#i am also hella tired its 2 am over here lol

[lcec0ldheart]

Random OC stuff of the day #2: What if the trio was in pokémon horizons?

I’m gonna be honest, I haven’t been feeling too good over the past day and I’m hella tired. I got ideas but i dont feel like writing them djdjddj so have something i cooked on priv

Sorry for the twitter jumpscare lmao but yeah. Explorers AU. At first I was like “found family for Violet and Amethio finally has someone his age to be around🎉” i kinda want to write a fic about that lol at some point but now I’m thinking about how hellish it would be to be Spinel’s subordinate if you’re not named Frankie (great oc btw she’s a cool oc by gem-in-the-horizon), especially since he’s so young and traumatized already. I’d imagine Spinel would have a fun time breaking him.

We saw what he did to Liko, without showing any remorse, now if he had complete power over this 15 year old kid that’s working for him? I think he’d be even worse. Spinel likes messing with people because he’s curious and its entertaining. Spinel’s a smart cunning guy who doesn’t care and that’s kind of terrifying

I may draw my ocs in pokémon soonish, although Frost did originate frm a pokemon rp anyways lol

(TW: Mind manipulation, memory erasure, also generally a guy taking advantage of a kid and mentally grooming him, this was hard for me to write too)

It starts relatively mild, at first.

Comments about how he’s been failing lately, how he’s looking more tired, how he’s not been enough. It hurts, of course, but Frost’s been through it before

Then Spinel starts testing with him.

Putting him in situations to see how a kid would cope with it. Making him do things that are completely against who Frost is. Molding him into something he’s not.

Eventually, Spinel begins to use his Beeheeyem, sometimes hovering over Frost, watching his every move, altering his memories, state of mind, what he thinks about, hell even trying to change who he is, trying to make him into Spinel’s sidekick. His toy. His tool.

It starts working. It took a while to, Spinel doesn’t mind playing the long game, and it’s more entertaining for him anyways, seeing it all drawn out. It was mild, at first, just forgetting where he was before the explorers, having some difficulty recalling what he was into before them, then it became forgetting people before the explorers, and he starts forgetting about his life before he was forced under Spinel entirely. There’s some people he can vaguely remember that stick for some reason, like this kid he met when he was 5 with those bright purple eyes, but other than that, he doesn’t know. He can’t remember.

~~~

Why should I leave? There’s no where else for me to go to. The explorers have always been my home. I’m meant to serve here. I’m destined to, it’s my very purpose, i am here to serve Master Spinel.

That is what I’m good for, and so, I’ll do whatever he desires. If master wants it, I want it. I will do whatever it takes. If I die, oh well, at least I served him well. But that would make me worthless, because I’m here to be his most valuable tool, and I can’t do that if I’m broken.

I’m happy here. This is my home -this is where I am from, and this is where I’ll stay. I am his -and I always will be, because I am Master Spinel’s most valuable possesion. That is what I am. I’m Spinel’s gem -and that’s all I will be. I’m happy with this.

Right?

~~~ OUGH THAT GOT DARK JESUS CHRIST I AM SO SORRY. This is why you dont let me on tumblr past 9 pm-

Anyways uh, if you managed to not be scared off by that, hope you have a good day, i am sorry this was short ive just been tired and today was kinda sucky so. see you tomorrow I guess

[zeravmeta]

I always do find it super interesting and really funny that its usually the human characters who are more monstrous than the actual monsters through no great feat other than passion and dedication.

Raikou can kick ass in every concievable way but the majority of her character arc stems with how she wants to connect with others but can't. However despite her horrible lineage she still genuinely wants to connect with people, which is a very human goal to have. Another great example of this is Merlin, who has the biggeat emotional boner for Guda because he genuinely cares about Guda yet because of hid half incubus nature deludes himself onto thinking it's just entertainment value. AND EVEN SPECIFICALLY his relationship with Saber and how he distanced himself entirely from Camelot because he felt he had no place there after watching it all fall and put himself in self-imposed isolation to observe and quite literally stay out of the way of those he loved. Lots of the monster characters really do care so deeply and strive to reach the abstract goal of being human yet don't realize that they're closer than they think.

Meanwhile people like Scathch, Nightingale, Hijikata, and Ushiwakamaru for example are all completely human yet find difficulty connecting with others because they're so set in their ways and achieved unreachable peaks of total badass compared to their peers that most normal people are just "thats illegal you're a monster". Alot (and i stress the ALOT) of the rules in Nasuverse are based around the perception of people and thats part of what warps these individuals to seem more monsterlike. Nightingale for example is a driven and determined person by nature but the idea that someone could be so genuinely selfless was registered as insane by the throne and so she was GIVEN madness enhancement (her 2nd interlude reveals that she actually didnt fit into ANY servant class container and that zerker was the last resort/best fit and warped her as a result). Another good example is Scathach, who was literally retconned by the world itself to be immortal becauae she achieved so much in so few time so the world gave her retroactive immortality she needs to live out in order to feasibly have done everything shes already done and properly exist. And once again, circling back to Ushiwakamaru, shes just WAY too good at kicking ass to be able to connect with others, and that perception does warp them. They're all literally too badass to cope. They stop being human and start being Heroes

Overall, appreciate your servants theyre trying their best

#oooh spicy #theres also how compared to raikou ushi is alot more concious of her actions bc she doesnt have the craziest mimosa of a bloodline like mama #so while raikou is insane due to mad enhancement + all her lineage nonsense AND her shit family #ushi is just *like that* because shes eager to please yet also has no problem just slaughrering dor the hell of it #ushiwakamaru: i love you do you need someone killed please let me kill someone for you

@zeravmeta

I feel it bears mentioning that because Raikou has Mad Enhancement EX, it’s a case of her actually being insane rather than it being an alteration of her personality due to Servanthood.

Similar to Hijikata, Spartacus, Nightingale, and Penth, she’s not insane because she was summoned as Berskerer and given Mad Enhancement, she has Mad Enhancement EX and became a Berserker because she was already insane to begin with.  It’s why she retains her Mad Enhancement, albeit a weakened version of it, in her Summer Lancer form.  

As for Ushi, her inability to actually relate to other people comes from a very similar place as Raikou.  Raikou isn’t human, and her inability to reconcile this with her desire to be human drives her insane.  Ushi IS human, but is so hypercompetent when it comes to fighting that she might as well be inhuman.

Raikou on a fundamental level can’t relate to humans because the nature of her existence is far beyond them.  Ushi can’t relate to humans because her skill and ability are so far beyond them.  For both of them, in different ways, killing is as easy as breathing.  “People” die so easily, and struggle with things they achieve so effortlessly, they just can’t truly get along with them.

But they both desire to live with humanity and be accepted.  Raikou channeled this into motherhood and got her validation from Kintoki.  Ushi channeled it into unfailing loyalty and fixated on her older brother, who as we all know betrayed and murdered her.

[lizacstuff]

SCK episode 46 asks!

Hi folks, below the read more you'll find a smattering of asks about this week's episode as well as a few spoilers for 47.

Good asks this week:

(under the cut)

Anonymous asked: this may be superficial of me, but why are they dressing Serkan in such ugly tops? they finally brought Eda's hair back but now this

BWAH! You're not wrong. You know what I'm wondering, if they've put him in some of those outfits because they are showing his suburban dad side? It's kind of a subtle nod to him embracing father hood and a different way of life? He's now all about running around the yard after his daughter and not about what he looks like when he's being SERKAN BOLAT, FAMOUS BUSINESS MAN and WORLD'S BEST ARCHITECT.

Also, Eda's hair, thank goodness they let that go once the flashbacks were over and we didn't need something to distinguish between then and now! Those curly bangs were not it.

Anonymous asked: They built up the Edser chemistry soooooo well throughout the episode... for that ending? Who decided to cut it there?! The scene was BEAUTIFUL I’m actually upset lol. are not we going to see any more? I’m not asking for a sex scene, I wanted to see THE moment they decided to get back together (the tattoo line doesn’t do it for me) - a few words, tears as they embrace, him walking through the door as she closes it, one passionate kiss, something! But it doesn’t feel like a cliffhanger that continues next week. I’ll be so underwhelmed when they cut to the morning after and we have to infer that they got back together overnight *sigh* if they were allowed 1 kiss only, id rather it have been here instead of ep 2

We do deserve to see how they reconcile, that should be one of the biggest moments of the season after 7 episodes of build up to it.

90% of final scenes in this show have continued uninterrupted the next week. To me there's no reason to think the next episode won't pick up right where this one left off. Crossing fingers!

Anonymous asked: It just hit me that Serkan is the “Kiraz” for Kemal - but Kemal actually missed his child’s whole 35 years 😬 this is an interesting turn of events. Also that line Serkan said about how fathers should love their child’s mother and how he didn’t have that with his own parents....but his real dad does love Aydan, more than she deserves haha.

Oh so true! Kemal really does love his mother more than she deserves! How he puts up with her, I don't know.

The parallel between Serkan/Kemal and Kiraz/Serkan is strong and I hope it gives Serkan some perspective when he starts grappling with this knowledge. I'm sure it's going to be very disconcerting for him, because while he expected to never see his father again, Alptekin is still his father. He's still the man who raised him and formed him into the man he is. Serkan still runs the company he founded and bears his name.

I don't expect any of that to change, but hopefully he can forge a separate relationship with Kemal that might fill some emotional holes that he has and bring him some peace.

None of that even contemplates how Kemal will feel, thankfully Aydan didn't willfully hide the truth from him. How awful to realize you lost 35 years.

We aren't there yet, but I wonder at what age with Kiraz learn the truth, that her dad is not an astronaut, that her parents went through hell with with cancer and plane crashes, and that her father didn't know of her existence until right before they met?

Just something to think about.

Anonymous asked: i'm so happy for hanker, don't get me wrong, and i'm also so happy we get "together" edser for so many episodes until the end, but i'm already tired of the constant "hanker improvising" comments i know i will be seeing. not that they don't improvise in some scenes, but i just know that every romantic edser scene is gonna be analyzed to hell bc ppl want to look for hanker in them. like there's no possible way that ayse, the writer ppl hate the most, could write any romantic scenes.. nope no way!

Yes, this is one of my pet peeves, I can't stand the "Edser left the chat" and all the "that's Hanker, not Edser" type conversation. it's so invasive and most of all disrespectful to not only the writers, but Hande and Kerem and all the work they pour into bringing Eda and Serkan to life.

One of the things in fandom that sets my teeth on edge is when folks take some interpretation of the character by the actor and then decide because it wasn't "scripted" (pro tip the vast majority of physical movements the actors make are "unscripted") that it must just be the actors themselves and have nothing to do with the characters. What an embarrassing and naïve assertion. Actors literal job is to take what's on the page and then translate that. So, no, OF COURSE, every look and touch is not scripted. The actors interpret how their characters would think and feel, and what they would do in given moments and then do those things.

Eda is not touching Serkan's arm just because Hande can't hold herself back from touching Kerem. Puh-lease, they are professionals. Grow up.

However, having said all that, I do think there was one scene that seemed to be very improvised this episode. The bean scene in the grocery store did feel like them just eFFing around. LOL.

andhewonherheart asked: @andhewonherheart: SCK promo department is best and worst all at the same time, cause giving away the last (cliffhanger) scene in fragman is just cruel. But based on the next week’s fragman thing happens that we we think happens *wink*

Hee! So true. The thing I'm grateful for is that in season 2 not one fragman has made me dread the episode, I think there was at least one fragman an episode from 29-37 that was hella upsetting.

As far as I'm concerned these fragmans are doing there job, making me want to watch.

I am really excited for Serkan planning how he's going to ask Eda to marry him, I wonder what Kiraz's reaction is going to be. So far she's been their very own cupid!

Anonymous asked: I didn't find it surprising that Serkan removed his tattoo as soon as Eda left. His logic is always out of sight out of mind though it doesn't work. He did the same when he broke up with her when he found out about the death of her parents. He removed all of her belongings. But their memories are too strong and enough for him to continue to remember her.

Truth! Will he ever learn that it's never going to work? He'll never be able to erase Eda, she has left an indelible mark on his soul. Let's hope he's never faced with that situation again! From here on out, he and Eda are together, a unit, and will live a long life together and in love.

Anyone have any guesses where Eda's tattoo is? Will we find out or will it remain between the characters.

Anonymous asked: I've seen some people say that Edser are getting married now way too fast and to that I just have to laugh lol. First there were complaints we don't have happy Edser and now when we do, of course there's something else. These two have had a rollercoaster of a year when they first met and a five year separation.. they've been through the dating phase, the engaged phase.. of course they'll head straight to the altar! It's not like Eda's plane proposal and that first wedding wasn't rushed either!

I'm on team head straight to the alter! No more waiting. They've had terrible luck, so they just need to tie the knot and make sure there are no easy outs.

As for people who think it's too fast, they don't even know the storyline yet, I swear there are folks who complain just because that's their personality and they're never satisfied.

Anonymous asked: From some of the spoilers of BTS pics, and the fragman we got, I was just reflecting on this season and Turk romcom dizis in general and I just wanted to say how LUCKY we are to see Edser married (again, from spoilers) and with a kid on screen for more than just 10 minute at the end of the finale. Like, it is really rare and as much as people have nitpicked on this season in general, I feel like watching these last episodes have been such a breeze after the last arc of S1.

Oh agreed, I think these episodes have been very enjoyable. The writers are giving me exactly what I want from this show. Comedy, UST, romance with a little light angst thrown in now and again. I would rewatch this season a dozen times before even thinking about watching anything from the 30s.

We are very lucky that we've got to see them as parents, and actually forming their family. We've gotten so much domestic goodness so far and we still have a ways to go. I'm very appreciative of this season and that Ayse came back, got rid of the constant ridiculous melodrama for melodrama's-sake and is telling a very human story about family and love persevering.

Anonymous asked: the last scene gave me chills for some reason. you could actually see eda fighting her head and her heart and deciding to take the step (metaphorically and physically!) towards him for good. i wanna SUE whoever decided to end it the ep there though.. it was actually cruel. also looking at the next frag.. it makes my heart soft that in the flashbacks we see serkan pushing off their wedding bc of his fears and now he can't propose and get married fast enough.. can't believe we're really getting it

I know, it's almost surreal at this point. Since we're near the end we know it's for real and won't be ruined by psychos or awful family members or terminal illness. I just hope that they give us an emotional scene when they get married, whether its just them or the whole cast is there as guests, after everything they've (we've) been through we need to see them both feeling that moment and reveling in it.

FYI - I'm out of town next weekend, so I may be slower than usual in replying to asks and in posting gifs of 47, but I'll get to it all eventually!

[fleshblueberry]

Babe wake up im going to rant about my ocs lore because im bored

Tw/cw depression, suicide, kidnapping, addiction, unreality

I write angsty stuff for my ocs oops-

When i first started making my characters they were very different in alot of ways and they were very different from what they are now. But i some how managed to glue all the chaos of my ocs together into a semi-coherent story. I went through an insane amount of world building with myself and i honestly dont think ive ever writen or typed any of it out before! its all just up in my head (and you know my memory is trash so ive probably forgotten of alot of things i made before lol). Anyways- i have two main story lines for my characters. Ethan's story, and Vevlet's story. Although i must admit Ethan's story is less complex than velvets simply beacsue it acts as a story of prequeal to Velvets story line. (Alternate realities that happen to have effect on each other basically- we love space time junk)

Ethan's world is very similar to ours, the most similar out of any of my fantasy worlds lol. Ethan's story revolves around self-discovery. I mean for it to be a wholesome/lighthearted thing that quickly leads up to dark undertones (spoilers lol). Ethan's story begins with Eef pre-transition (AFAB to NB). We get to see Ethan learn about themself and have fun exploring emotions and what it means to be alive. Ethan comes from a run-down family (mom khs, dad mia). So he lives with his adoptive parents (who i have yet to design and think about- theyre lesbians 100% though). A major moment for Eef is meeting his partner Seth. As you already know Ethan and Seth are cute ass boyfriends and stuff but guess what! im jammed their story full of angst and edgy shit bc i "wrote" most of this when i was hella depressed! Anyways Seth's family is like moderally welathy, wealthier than most i would say. Seth catches feelings for the emo chick ofc (forgot to metion Eef was definately a hot goth girl before he transitions).... uh yea anyways seth ends up flirting and crushing on eef and eef is like yea sure im bored and sad why not. and they end up dating after a while. Theres an important moment in their relationship when Ethan take Seth to this dead tree. THis dead tree is very important also bc it is where his mother hanged herself, and Ethan doesnt quite remember that bc he was very young when it happened, but he knows it as a place of comfort and he goes there alot when he feels sad or alone. this tree could be taken as symbolizim but heheh ill never tell. anyways Ethan is like yo my fevorite tree and Seth is like wtf okay bro ily and all but why a dead tree with an unstable tire swing?? ANd ethans like idk but i like it here reminds me of my childhood (op my guy) and they spend the night there. Also when ethan comes out to seth as nonbinary seth is just like ok,,, because hes bisexual lol. anyways time skip and Seth has some addiction problems once he graduates, long story short- Ethan doesnt like it bc his dad was a druggie so he trys to help Seth and Seth raises his voice and ethan is tiny compared to his bf so hes naturally like terrified of being hit and he suddenly feels his world of happy and peace he build back up bieng destroyed once again so he heads to his mothers dead tree and decides life isnt worth it anymore, and he hangs himself in the exact spot his mother did.... once seth comes off one of his highs or whatever hes like- oh fuck i yelled and acted agro to my traumatized partner. and he immedatly goes to the tree bc its Ethans favortie spot but its to late. regret is the only emootion anymore... its over for them.

now youre probably wondering how the absolute hell does that tie into velvets lore?? well do i have a tale for you. Velvets sotry begins on her 21st birthday, she is out for drinks with her douchebag bf and her bestfriend. several drinks later she yells over blaring club music shes going to the restroom, and as shes walking back she sees her bf and her bestie making out and she doesnt even say anyhting and walks out alone. She is making her way back to her apartment very tipsy. She then hears a vechile driving beside her, she cant make out anyhting theyre saying and the people in the car get out and before she even relises whats going on shes thrown into the vechile and is being beaten and yelled at. She passes out as theyre driivng to somewhere. When she next awakes she is in a barn-looking place. Concreate walls painted red and straw all over the floor. she cant stand, her legs stung and so did her entire body. for several days- she doesnt know how long she stayed in this place unable to move or do anything. Weak and starving, she gathered up her last bit of strength and hung herself on a low board (havent really worked out the details on that scence bc i keep changing my mind but she does hang herself). Cut to a space of nothingness- legit nothing- exactly its impossible to imagine nothing. In the nothing sits velvet all skin and bone, and then an entity, a hooded figure with long hair, sits next to her. No words are spoke, but the entity looks at velvet longingly. Then it tears out its eye- just full on plunges its hand into its socket and rips it out. bloody mess honestly. the entity hands its eye to velvet, and she takes it. there is no thoughts here, no sound, only actions. Cut once more to a coriners room place? ya know the place with dead bodies and tables and shit- anyways a bright light emerges from dead!vevlets chest and surrounds her entire body. *cue stunned doctor mans* Velvet arises from her death with her scars healed over and... wings. Yup shes an angel now. I mean her world already had monsters and things of suppernatural belonging but- angels are rare. She makes 1 of 2 angels in their relam as of current. Angels are "made" from regrets. Regret overflowing from two sources- one long dead and the other recent. This is where ethan comes in. Ethan's regret from how he died was powerful and sad, powerful enough for his spirt- an entity- to reach Velvets. Velvet too, had much regret in her death. So young and so many things that could have been avoided. In the days following up to her death in the barn/cellar she only felt regret. Regret for all she did and all she didnt do. So much pain summoned the entity. Their powerful forces of regret pulled them together and allowed Velvet to return- but at a price for the both of them. the entity lost its eye- symbolizing a loss of humanity and conscientiousness. While Velvet lost herself, she no longer can view her world in the same way. She has severe ptsd- like episodes and halucinations. She cant go back, she has to live through he own grief. Velvets appearnace also changes quite a bit. Her hair got longer, she has two sleek gray wings on her back, and- one of her eyes are purple now. why does it hrut her to see that eye? why is it all so familiar yet far away. Her human brain can hardly understand all the changes. But she was gifted this- she knows she must try. And luckily for her society sees angels as higher beings. They are given the umost respect but they are also greatly feared because of how misterious their origins are. The only other known angel meets with velvet quite alot through her story, he will act as a sort of guide/plot device to make things a bit easier for myself (havent worked out his lore tho or even a design for him hjbfkjsdb). Anyways im tired and its 1:35 am so thats all the lore you get for now, plus its the stuff ive thought about the most so- i dont really want to think any furtherb ahead yet lol. to many little things to work out...... i love creating but oml typing hurts after an hour or so-

Jam out!

... I don't even know what to say to this

[cutenessinanutshell]

You know what i’ve been thinking today?? How it’s been ten years since I started actively writing about my life on the internet. I started sometime in 2011 on Xanga, when I’d write about all the dirty day dreams I’ve had as a hormonal teenager.  I have clear memories of writing about all the things I wanted to do to him when we went to see a school play. And I remember reading all the comments and feeling heard, whatever I was talking about. Then Xanga shut down and I couldn’t find a blogging site I liked (and i still can’t high key), so we came to tumblr. A few different blogs and a couple years later and here we are. 

All the boys, all the sadness, all the adventures later. I think what we can all conclude, I am hella dramatic and emotional LOL I also LOVE Taylor Swift hahaha

I was thinking about how it took tj seven years but he’s finally starting to be better to me. I still think he’s bluffing but the ball hasn’t dropped yet.  And so I’m happy these days. Things feel more quiet. It felt really loud a month ago, but not because of him. The studio’s been closed since November. Ontario has the record for longest lockdown in the world. If you add the amount of days we have been closed since COVID hit us, it adds up to 368 days. An entire year without a consistent income. I’m tired of it. I missed winter and spring with the girls. Sad. I miss having things to do. Vanessa and I want to find a new space. One with hopefully more windows or natural light. Open brick would be the dream but it’s hard to find those kind of spaces in the suburbs. We want to offer more than just pole and circus. We want to make it a space that has turf, and weights and barbells and physiotherapists. But not up tight like a regular gym. Still very feminine and in line with the brand. Glamourous, fierce and epic. The studio that throws the best showcases in the GTA. But with so much more. I want to elevate the brand and be able to pay myself properly by the end of the year. My plan to move out went out the window with the pandemic, so this is the next best thing and my only hope. 

I have to build my following more. I   know I could be worthy of a bigger following. But I’m terrified of sharing on social media because of November. It makes me so anxious. I’ve started experimenting with Facebook and I’m comfortable with it i think, but posting on IG, where majority of my community is active, gives me the worst anxiety.  There’s just so many people watching me. So many people that don’t like me watching me. Sooo many people that would smile if they heard I failed. All watching me and that’s a lot of pressure. I know you’re not supposed to care what those people think but I do.  I hate them for making me feel like I’ll never be good enough, and still I can’t help but freak out at the idea of them seeing my stories and thinking “pft.”  I’m just bitter because girls showed so many colours to me. Girls I trained with all the time, who showed that they never thought I was good enough, and they were keeping up appearances when they talked to me because I was on the inside.  Girls who I would help and give free training time to, just dismissed me. Let me go over their head because I was just the ditzy admin without a real people job like them, so I could never. Those are the girls watching me. The people who watch my stories and laugh at me and gossip in group chats. 

My stalker is also back. Yall I hadn’t heard from her since August. Like bruh I went to vegas in 2019. Why is she still on my ass, i literally can’t figure it out and its gonna drive me mad. I just don’t get what her issue is, I’ve literally never met her. Ever. But she thinks I’m running my mouth about her, when I only know that she’s constantly calling me a sand n word, and telling me im a loser prostitute on a pole and that I’m a loser bitch whatever the fuck lol. She’s trying to blackmail her but I’m not engaging. I haven’t engaged at all and it’s still been going on for 2 years.  She lives in arizona, i do not know this bitch LOL. You get tagged in a guys IG post once and then you’re fucked forever i guess.  She’s a literal crazy person and someone needs to commit her

My life is boring because of the pandemic haha. I just wanted to write. 

\

[deltastorm101]

So, I tried to calculate Control...

... and its Epic Games deal, with the help of my certified smooth brain™ and probably incorrect sources. I started this last night hella tired and with a headache, I have finished it up today hella tired and with a headache, and this is what I produced: bullshit! :D But hey, at least double checked bullshit that’s open for discussion and contribution and expansion. Also, I probably won’t list the sources because a) I’m lazy and b) I didn’t have to dig thaaat deep down to find all this so if you really wanna know you could probably hit google with it as well. Anyhow here we go lol So, the initial thought which got all of this rolling was the 2020-wrap-up-post Remedy linked on their twitter, and Epic’s linked publishing announcement in it: studios Remedy, Playdead and GenDesign will release their next next-gen games with Epic. Now, we all know Remedy are working on some sort of Alan Wake-ish thing as we speak (right? right?? god I hope so), which meanssss our boy will most likely be an Epic exclusive. Which makes me kinda sad because, well. I’m deep in Steam’s ass. Hell, I waited for Control for a full year before I played it because they can pry the Steam version from my cold dead hands. So I asked myself... was it worth it for them? How much money did they throw at Remedy (and 505 Games) to have them play along? Would they have reached more people from the get-go if they had released it on Steam right away? Did the individual programmer, designer, writer, artist, person behind it profit from this at all? (Also, like, about the rights and copyright thing,,,,, you’d think they could have learned from Alan Wake and its IP belonging to Microsoft and so not really being able to do anything more with it because they don’t ‘own’ it and shit) buuut anyway that’s not the point of this post, now it’s time to do some MATH BABEY

Ok, let’s start with some things we know. Facts. Figures. Data. Turns out my initial question, how much money was involved, could be answered by doing one (1) google search: according to Wikipedia, Epic gave Remedy and 505 Games €9.49mio. The total budget for the game was €26.9mio over the course of 3 years of development. We know that as of December 2020, over 2mio copies of the game were sold, with November 2020 being the best-selling month ever since its initial release in August 2019. This is where question 1) comes into play: how many of those 2 million copies were sold in 2019 and how many in 2020? Stay tuned, I think I found out.

We know that Remedy gets to keep 45% of the revenue, which, I assumed, means that 505 keeps the remaining 55% (probably a lot more going on there but shhh). We know that Control’s sales cooked up €17.84mio in 2019 (so months September – December), €17.7mio of those in the first month alone (O.O). Side note: because it came out at the very end of August, I’ll ignore that month and declare September the first sales month.

We know that 60% of sales in 2019 were digital ones (aka Epic Store, mostly), 40% physical ones (consoles PS4 and XB1), while in 2020, only 10% of sales were physical and a whopping 90% digital; which is people on Epic who wanted to get their hands on the first DLC and – you guessed it – the Steam release of the Ultimate Edition in August 2020.

Which begs question 2): what’s bigger, 60% of 2019 sales because ‘ooh shiny new game’, or 90% of 2020 sales because ‘yay steam release’? The answer may look obvious, but you have to take into account the dropping price, which I also researched for your pleasure and enjoyment.

For this I used a German website called idealo.de, which focuses on looking for the best deals for basically anything you can buy on the internet, and it also gives you diagrams that describe at which point in time the product was at which exact price. This is what it gave me: - release price: €60 - December 2019: €41 (PS4)/€44 (XB1) - mid-2020: €30 - Ultimate Edition release: €30 - December 2020: €14 (PS4)/€18 (XB1)/€30 (Ultimate Editions) At this point I was like “lol hold on i need chocolate for this cuz i’ll be here for some time *sweating*”

To continue this mess™, I see more questions: 3) How many employees does Remedy have, which positions do they work in and what are their salaries? 4) How many employees does 505 have, which positions and salaries do they have? 5) What’s the total revenue that Control has generated so far?

And also some more stuff like, are my numbers accurate, am I even grasping these concepts correctly, are there even more people involved or am I just trying to explain complete crap (yes) but let’s just ignore all of that shall we. At that point I went “oh shit what have i gotten myself into, this screen does not get my point across, i need pen and paper” and you know shit is gonna go DOWN when I do math on paper.

My paper math birthed the following calculation:

Following this up, we can calculate the end-of-2019 sales, if we set the price for September and October to €60, for November and December to approx. €45:

Now, you might notice that one of those numbers is big and the other is HUGE. Why might that be? Well...

- Covid19: everyone stayed at home and needed video games to play - More sale months of the year, naturally - dropping price: why get it for €60 when you can get it for 20 - Ultimate Edition: why buy it in June when you get more content in August aaaand... - it comes out on Steam.

With this in mind, let’s see what questions we can answer: 1) 661,110 copies in 2019; 1,338,889 copies in 2020 2) 60% digital sales in 2019 means 396,666 Epic copies; 90% digital sales in 2020 means 1,205,000 copies – most of it from Steam? Some of it? A good chunk? The bigger chunk? There’s no way of really knowing for sure but... you could read this into it. I definitely am. 3) Google told me Remedy had a little over 250 employees at the end of 2019... 4) ... and 505 has less than 100. I found no good sources for this, I think linkedin said 37, someone else said 50. I’ll just use the 50 figure, idk. No idea man. and for 5) I’ll contradict my point that the Steam release is what knocked the sales out of the park and assume that the number of sold copies stayed the same across all 12 months of 2020, which gives us this:

Ok and now we’re getting into the most dangerous of danger zones because I have no idea how companies or capitalism work, so for educated people™, the remaining calculations might read like a toddler wrote them; I apologize profusely and hereby present last night’s brain vomit:

As stated earlier, development took 3 years, but everyone wanted to get paid in 2020 as well so let’s use 4 years to find out the salaries, which is 48 months. Let’s assume the utopian idea that every employee on the line here gets the exact same amount of money (LOL ikr but shhhh, let’s live out our dirtiest equality fantasies for a second ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)). Which would mean...

And now without the Epic Deal™:

Quod erat demonstrandum. Remedy has been selling their souls to Epic for €350 a month since 2017. (I don’t mean this as maliciously as I’m making it sound, don’t worry xD)

OKAY SO, O B V I O U S L Y, I have not the slightest idea what on earth I’m talking about so read this like you’d read a good fanfiction. We don’t know the different salaries across the different positions (and genders HAH), we don’t know if other parties were involved, I’ve completely ignored the sum that Epic themselves get, I have ignored taxes, I don’t know if my numbers are accurate (they’re definitely not I mean 505 must have more employees than 50), if I made mistakes (yes), and also somewhere along the way I forgot to use the €26.9mio budget figure because, uuh, I have no idea where to use it, what it means, where did it come from, where did it go, cotton eye joe - but oh well, I’m not starting over, take it or leave it.

So... I can now officially say I have written hot steamy economics fic xD Man I put waaay too much time into this but damn was it fun. Good three-hour-deep-dive (two of them spent munching on chocolate half-asleep listening to psytrance to keep my brain twitchy). Real-life-theorizing. Fuck capitalism. Don’t do drugs. Pet a cat. Wear your mask. Call your grandparents.

If there’s typos in this I’m sorry but also I’m not, I can’t be bothered to proofread again lol. Goodnight imma catch up on the sleep I lost. Gotta love full moons

[i-am-just-a-kiddo]

Thank you @vishcount for tagging me once again, you busy bee 💞

This took ages but was fun

1. What is the color of your hairbrush?  black

2. Name a food you never eat. hard cheese? like cheese that is not melted, the only exception is mozarella and feta 

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? both, my system is all over the place so it keeps varying between extremes. but i loathe heat so i am not a good summer person, i whine so much 

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? i watched this girl on youtube dragging onision’s book lol

5. What’s your favorite candy bar? hmmm i feel like i haven’t eaten one in ages but the one i remembered now is kaštan - the chocolate is so smooth, but i don’t have it often

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? i don’t think so? unless you count the gymnastics competions i went to when i was a child and still doing gymnastics

7. What is the last thing you said out loud? “enjoy your food” to my flatmate cooking in the kitchen 

8. What is your favourite ice cream? chocolate and lemon sorbet (or just any sorbet tbh) 

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? water

10. Do you like your wallet? yeah it’s cute, my dad bought it for me when i went through my kuroshitsuji phase - it’s fake-leather with the demonic sigil on one side and the japanese name on the other (also it’s hella battered rip)

11. What is the last thing you ate? pasta with spinach and feta (why is it with these i always eat pasta)

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? nope

13. What’s the last sporting event you watched? am just gonna count street dance china here

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? just normal salty ones

15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to? @vishcount as well, because i love them and i enjoy their screaming as well as screaming back at them 💞

16. Ever been camping? yes, my family and i used to go camping in italy all the time, it was so lovely. i miss those times sometimes. i’ve also been camping during festivals and the last time i went was denmark in summer 2019

17. Do you take vitamins? i take vitamin d’s during winter, and also eat oranges and lemons very responsibly

18. Do you regularly attend a place of worship? i do not, i only like looking at churches/mosques when they are empty so i guess i do that often 

19. Do you have a tan? no, and my mum keeps scolding me for my paleness

20. Do you prefer chinese or pizza? please don’t make me choose sob. i wanna say both, but i think pizza wins by slight margin

21. Do you drink your soda through a straw? not really, unless am at mcdonalds or somewhere else

22. What color socks do you usually wear? very colourful ones with patters!! since my entire outfit is black usually i love having cute/colourful/patterned socks (my recent treasure was provided by vishie and i sobbed)

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? i can’t drive

24. What terrifies you? the future

25. Look to your left, what do you see? my water glass, my crocheting, a pile of writing material

26. What chore do you hate most? emptying the dishwasher - it’s too noisy

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? steve irwin, i loved watching his show when i was little

28. What’s your favorite soda? coke or sprite 

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? i can’t drive, so any other option

30. What’s your favorite number? i think eight but i don’t have strong feelings

31. Who’s the last person you talked to? my flatmate

32. Favorite meat? hmm fish and seafood (am 80% vegetarian so yeah) 

33. Last song you listened to? dragon tongue squad - chinese cooking (this song is so feel good and i love it okay) 

34. Last book you read? phew let me thing for a second. 

okay so i couldn’t remember the last book i read but i can name a longer dissertation called transformation and tradition: cataloguing chinese art in the middle and late imperial eras in by cheng yen-wen; and am working my way through an actual book called bronze and stone: the cult of antiquity in song dynasty china by sena yunchiahn c. (i feel like i don’t read anything else apart from uni lately - and honestly i am fine with that cause it’s fun) 

35. Favorite day of the week? friday maybe? 

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? nope, we gotta sit here til tomorrow 

37. How do you like your coffee? black, in summer iced

38. Favorite pair of shoes? all my pairs of docs boots

39. Time you normally get up? hmm recently i have woken up somewhere between 9-10 but usually i take ages to get up so 11ish is a good time

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? i loooooove sunsets in every form but i experience sunrises so rarely that it always feels very special and magical

41. How many blankets on your bed? one, and one for emergency

42. Describe your kitchen plates. bold of you to assume i have one set of kitchen plates and not just a jumbled mess of second hand plates and plates ppl have left in this flat ages ago. and honestly i wouldn’t want it any other way. (but i bought myself a pair of pastel pink and black plates from ikea)

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment. moderately tidy, for once it is not crowded and there are only some pots piling by the sink for drying

44. Do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? sparkling wine/prosecco, wine, beer, gin tonic

45. Do you play cards? no, only uno and maumau cause i suck at cards

46. What color is your car? invisible cause nonexistent

47. Can you change a tire? nope!!

48. Your favorite state or province? uhm. huh. i think where i live right now is good, the capital is its own province so that is nice

49. Favorite job you’ve had? i have only worked at one factory that produces measurement equipment and spirit levels for 5,5 months in total and i gotta say, it was surprisingly okay? i mean it was hell, because everyone is treated like machines, but i guess i enjoyed doing physical labour on my own without having to interact with ppl a lot; and with those i interacted they were really nice and you sort of connect through this atmosphere of being stuck there (though i guess i was most privileged cause i knew i would go to uni and wouldn’t be stuck here for the next 30 years like many others that worked there. i am angry about this, why is capitalism like this)

i am tagging @sassyassassy , @intyalote , @the-cloud-whisperer , @isabellaofparma (two in one day - i am sorry, my friend vishie is busy tagging me in all these so am just continuing this love train). no pressure though, as always

[fiddle-styx]

on-going jikook fics

come and enjoy that wonderful moment of receiving an update notification

psa: i am sharing these wonderful stories because i love them and they deserve more recognition. please do not hassle the authors about updates because it is a terrible feeling and they don’t deserve that. we can just enjoy the wonderful anticipation of updates and share love for stories together!

go tell these authors how amazing their stories are instead!

(my tastes are all over the place, so enjoy variety too)

college/uni au and/or social media aus:

International playboy (don't answer) by blt_prf | 119k, 21chp oH I FUCHKED UP I FU UCKED UP YOUR'E NOT NAMJOON yeah what I've been trying to tell you or the one in which Jimin manages to mess up everything in one night and accidentally texts the guy he has a crush on

HIM by blt_prf | 99k, 14/16chp Jungook falls in love with the color red when he sees Jimin. Every single time a little bit more. In which Jimin has motion sickness and travels way too much, Jungkook is good at everything but relationships and Taehyung simply wants everyone to be happy. Hoseok and Yoongi are a mess, Namjoon takes too many philosophy classes and Jin makes sure nobody gets arrested. Everyone's in love and no one wants to grow up.

travel au:

until then, sink slowly by flitter | 46k, 8chp After a breakup, Jimin needs to get away. He ends up in Santorini, 5.4k miles away from home, eager to distance himself from anything remotely related to love. Too bad fate has other plans, in the form of a tour guide named Jungkook.

magic/supernatural aus:

Maelstrom by Charmander | 6k, 1/8chp It's been one year since Jungkook ran away with the circus, one year since he learned of the angel blood that runs through his veins. He thought he had learned everything about the supernatural world by now, but he's barely even touched the surface of its darkness. series here: Silk

a room inside your heart (you'll be okay here) by ohbutter | 26k, 2/3chp “Hyung, there’s something horribly, horribly wrong here.” “I’d say so, yes. You destroyed our bathroom.” Jimin mhms. “Right… why though?” All Jimin can manage is, “Orange.” Yoongi nods slowly, “Yes Jimin, orange.” “Green.” Now Namjoon and Jin are huddled behind Yoongi, peering inside. Jimin sits up and sees Namjoon’s cotton candy pink hair. “What’s the date today?” “December 18th 2016.” alternatively: jimin wakes up two years in the past, he has horrendous orange hair, his friends are in love and here, so is he

The Art of Drowning by Kookies_N_Jams | 45k, 22chp Jeon Jungkook doesn't want to die; he's just tired of living. Park Jimin is surrounded by death, but all he wants is to live. When their worlds collide, everything changes.

For and Against Us by thefifth | 18k, 11chp Jungkook trusts fate. Jimin? Not so much.

idol/celebrity aus:

Faking It by little_star_in_the_universe | 16k, 6chp "Jungkook, are you listening to me?" "Yeah." "You're lying." - Jungkook is tired. He's tired of being told what to say, what to do, how to act, how to respond, how to write his own fucking music. He's tired of it all. All he wants is a break. He doesn't expect to find someone who'd be more of a break than being home with his parents.

depth of field by petrichorian | 30k, 4chp “You’re seriously telling me you just spontaneously took a hella good picture of Suga and now you’re being called Jeongguk masternim?” or Jeon Jeongguk accidentally becomes Suga's new popular fansite, makes famous friends and tries to avoid how much he wants to kiss BTS' maknae, Park Jimin. 

The Last of Them All by dglrd | 9k, 13chp dyspraxia [/dɪsˈpraksɪə/]: a developmental disorder of the brain in childhood causing difficulty in activities requiring coordination and movement. in which jungkook has to juggle the difficulties of having dyspraxia and being an idol at the same time.

The Voice by Pinkworld | 25k, 6chp Jimin is a veteran ASMRtist, spreading the tingles through Youtube. He never shows his face. He's been low-key (Taehyung: I'm pretty sure drooling falls under HIGH-key, dude) interested in Jeongguk, a popular cover artist on Youtube. Completely against his confident character, Jimin doesn't find courage to reach out and just stalks Jeongguk's channel and instagram for a year. They finally get to messaging each other (Thank you Taehyung and Jin), then texting, then talking.... and that's when it gets a bit problematic...

smut focused:

Switch It by ashina | 75k, 17chp this is a series where jungkook and jimin are fucking. how original.

the chains that bind us by busanpjm | 19k, 3chp “You are not simply some flashy accessory, Jeonggukie. You are mine to use as I wish as long as I want. Whether you are twenty or forty; it makes no difference. You are that lithe and lewd slum mongrel who fawns on no one, and I am the slave knight of Midas who holds the chains to your collar. How could you imagine I would let you go at this juncture?” Jeongguk, a slum mongler and Jimin, an elite, find themselves wrapped up in a relation neither of them could have seen coming. or the Ai no kusabi au with a hint of something else and more.

soulmates au:

hard candy by jiminlogy | 25k, 8chp Jimin douses himself in colours every day and then he meets black and white. 

Shatter Me by lostinjungkook | 19k, 16chp »There were things Jungkook wanted to tell Jimin. But he knew they would hurt his hyung. So he buried them inside and let them hurt him instead.« 19 year old Jungkook lives in a world where 25% of the world population is born with a soulmate mark on their wrist and supernatural powers running through their veins. But he never had a chance to see the beauty that the world bears as he grew up in the fangs of Omega, a facility led by humans who try everything to create the strongest inhuman possible. What will happen when he meets six boys in the middle of the woods and discovers his soulmate among them?

abo dynamics:

Howl by Ravennest | 17k, 4chp Taehyung was convinced wherewolves existed — he only had to prove it to his best friend Jimin then he’d get bragging rights for years! But he never expected to be one of the wolves mate.

let me love you by Thejenn | 12k, 2chp the one where jungkook is shamelessly in love with his shy mate jimin

Guide Books are for Suckers--or Life is Like Trying to Build a Lego Death Star, but Some Fucker Burned the Instruction Book For lols by Momochii | 26k, 7/9chp He never expected to be an alpha. He also never expected to present in the middle of dance practice. He definitely never planned for what would happen if he, maybe, accidentally, tried to claim his best friend only seconds after presenting—in the middle of fucking dance practice. But hey, predictability is over-rated, right?

Leave Your Mark by snarcsics | 112k, 7/15chp Out of the three patients within Namjoon's lab, Jungkook is the one Jimin finds the most frightening, yet shamelessly intriguing. Even as a beta, there’s something distinctly animalistic about Jungkook that does not bode well for Jimin.

mafia au:

The Fire Was Screaming Out Your Name (And I Watched You Burn) by JungkookieBiased | 8k, 4chp “Jungkook...come here." Jimin crossed one leg over the other, arms folded across his chest. The taller male strode over in two long strides, head bowed down. Jimin tilted his chin up and Jungkook followed the movement like Jimin was controlling a puppet with a twitch of his fingers. Jimin leaned in right beside his ear, "Eliminate him." OR Jeon Jungkook belongs to him. Jeon Jungkook lives for him. Park Jimin, the most feared mafia leader, belongs to him just as much but won't say so.

spiderman au:

little do you know (i love you 'til the sun dies) by stellars | 7k, 1/2chp jeongguk is spiderman and everytime he comes back from one of his adventures, he goes to jimin to get patched up, spinning white lies about how he's out saving kittens from getting run over.

cute/fluffy/domestic/smut:

A Wicked Miniseries by Charmander | 30k, 4chp A collection of moments and flashbacks from Jimin’s and Jungkook’s life together; from back road street racer and tired, night shift police officer to spoiled, domestic boyfriends. series here: Chase Me, Race Me, Taste Me 

tattoo au:

Damp nights by vanillajae | 20k, 5chp Two years later and history repeats itself. Jungkook pops back into Jimin’s life on a rainy day under a bus stop, and whether Jimin wants it or not the storm is back. series here: Thunderstorms

some ot7!

A Hint of Magik. by moonchildleigh | 35k, 7chp Jeon Jeongguk is the son of two powerful evil Warlocks. He's lived his whole life in Busan inside the Warlock community, and hasn't come into contact with anyone else in the Magik world. This changes, however, when his parents are arrested and jailed for the murder of a Witch. Being the son of two of the most dangerous people in the magical community, The Council of Magik has to decide what to do with him. Jeongguk isn't like other Warlocks though, as he doesn't have the Calling to darkness like the rest. He's abnormal. His fate seems sealed, until two interesting men show up at his court hearing and demand to adopt him. or Ot6 lives in an enchanted forest in America and take young Warlock Jungkook into their home because they're absolute sweethearts.

Late Bloomer by LulaWrites | 91k, 25/26chp Given that he’d made it into adulthood without having ever experienced any dynamic-related instincts or pre-heat symptoms, Jungkook (and the rest of society) had naturally assumed the maknae was a Beta. Turns out they were wrong. (Or, the one where Jungkook goes into heat unexpectedly and subsequently gets coddled by his affectionate hyungs.) The Last of Them All by dglrd

[fishmech]

DaNcInG-iN-yOuR-dUsT.nEt

.x.Welcome.x.

Welcome

to Dancing-in-Your-Dust.net. The name comes from the AFI song Paper Airplanes (makeshift wings). This is just a place to express my thoughts and ideas, if you don't like it..simply leave. If you do however, stick around and enjoy =D

.x.Girl.x.

Lizzy. Arizona. sXe. Vegetarian. Sarcastic. AFI. Tiger Army. Nekromantix. <3 <3 Davey Havok. Make-Up. Music. Movies. <3 Johnny Depp. HUGE Dork. Despair Faction. TNBC. Lock, Shock & Barrel. Jack Skellington. Halloween.

.x.Site Stats.x.

Since:

June 20th, 2003

Webby:

Lizzy

Hits: Listed:

Featured Site:

minor-threat.net

Brush Credits:

Kenekila.net

;

Anti-Poser.org

;

Angelic-Trust.net

Guestbook:

Sign it!

Tools:

;

;

;

Voting:

Twi5ted Reality Awards

.x.About the Layout.x.

This is the 9th layout for DIYD. It features the Movie Sleepy Hollow ! =). The pictures are from

johnny depp online

and google image search.

.x.Content.x.

Come's in a Pop-Up

Hiatus (Be Back Soon)

.x.Web Cam.x.

.x.Hostees.x.

/mine

/afi

/davey

/listing

/alyssa

.x.Link Me.x. .x.True Fucking Love.x.

<3 Sadey

;

<3 Cristal

;

<3 Alyssa

;

<3 Carol

;

<3 Ashley

;

<3 Stacey

;

<3 Krista

;

<3 Karla

.x.Affiliates.x.

.x.Current Events.x.

08-11-03: My B-Day 09-09-03: Jeanelle's B-Day 09-10-03: Work @ Merch Booth 4 the Starting Line 09-20-03: EdgeFest 03' 09-24-03: Seeing AFI/Hot Water Music/Bleeding Through in Fresno 09-26-03: Seeing AFI/Hot Water Music/Bleeding Through in Las Vegas 09-27-03: Seeing AFI/Hot Water Music/Bleeding Through in Utah 10-13-03: Kevin <3 <3 & Ashley's Birthday 10-14-03: Nightfall 10-30-03: Seeing AFI/Hot Water Music/Bleeding Through in Universal CA for Halloween Eve show 10-31-03: Halloween AFI'S Halloween Show??

.x.Playlist.x. Smile--AFI Jack of all Trades--Hot Water Music Unstoppable--Death by Stereo The Power of Moonlite--Tiger Army True Romance--Tiger Army Who Killed the Cheerleader--Nekromantix A Single Second--AFI Darkangel--VNVNATION Dirty Magic--The Offspring Anabelle Lee--Tiger Army The Man Who Sold the World--David Bowie Can I Say?--Dag Nasty .x.CD Player.x. Art of Drowning--AFI Sing the Sorrow--AFI Shut your mouth and open your eyes--AFI Moonlite--Tiger Army Can I say?--Dag Nasty Empires--VNVNATION War of all Time--Thursday .x.Stalker.x.

DancingInUrDust

E-Mail:

lizzy@dancing-in-your-dust.net

Deadjournal:

coinXreturn

.x.At the Moment.x. Date:October 1, 2003 Mood: Tired Eating: Nothing Drinking: nothin Watching: nothin Hearing: Transplants Wearing: Night of the living dead Shirt and duck pj's Thinking: AFI IS ONLY 28 DAYS AWAY!!!!!!! Talking to:  nobody Drooling over: Davey Havok Wanting: The 30th to get here! Surfing: Nothing .x.Tagboard.x.                                      Name:               URL:              Message:                      

.x.Fanlistings.x.

MORE??

.x.Cliques.x.

I believe in ¤

Aliens, Ghosts, and Magic

Horror Movie

||

The Lost Boys & The Bride of Frankenstien

REAL men paint their nails.

AFI is my obsession

Morningstar by AFI is MINE

My Song::Morningstar

MORE??

.x.Last Look.x.

.x.Desktop.x.

October 6, 2003

Hello all..thought I'd write in here since I have pretty much nothing else to do. I've been up to pretty much nothing. Sadey and I went to the mall and bought our AFI limited edition Art & Artisha dolls..which cost an arm and a leg. We also talked to kevin..just him tho cuz Bobby-o wasn't there today. It was hilarious because when we were leaving I go to hug kevin and I accidentally hit his nose...he's all like "oh great she's trying to beat me up too!" good times man, good times. Anyway in other good news, Sadey's mom is thinking about opening a store sorta like Hot Topic @ the mall..and it's gonna be hella rad cuz well, I can work there =D We'd carry much more cooler things than Hot Topic..I mean I like that store at times but, they never really carry anything that cool now. Speaking of HT im gonna start working there prolly in mid november. Im putting my 2 weeks @ Target in tommorow. Anyhoo while I was at HT I saw this rad velvet black dress with like flared sleeves and I want it for the show in Universal but I checked the price and its like 90 bucks so I was like hell no..so Im gonna have my mom make one for me and im adding shit on it like red laced trim...its gonna be so super awesome =D Im trying to think of what else that has happened..Oh I was sick this weekened and I called in for work and Nickey (the LOD) got all pissed and told me im not taking my job seriously anymore and all this other BS and she hung up on me...so she basically called me a liar....and im telling you, I was really sick! So I woke up the next morning and it was already like 11:00am and my shift was supposed to start at 9 and I was like shit...they're gonna fire me. So I called Nickey and she apologized for hanging up on me and that she doesnt wanna lose me as an employee and that she values me and shit..I was just like yea, well you're in for a rude awakening cuz im quitting haha..no I didn't say that but I was thinking it..so she told me to just take the day off. I was like cool ok. So I guess thats all that really happened...I went to this wedding party thing on Saturday night w/ sadey a whole bunch of Italians from brooklyn...awesome as hell im in love with their accents..lol. There was this annoying kid there that was trying to impress Sadey and I by acting all drunk and telling us how much he had to drink when in all reality he wasn't really drunk he was just pretending because all his mom would let him have was one drink..little does he know we're sXe..haha loser. Alright anyhoo I guess thats all for site news.. my wonderful katie (rapturous voice davey fansite) is leaving me ::cries:: she bought a domain,

davey-havok.net

Ill miss you much Katie =D Go visit her now BTW. But the good news is that I got a new hostee,

Barbara

. She's gonna open the fanlisting for AFI's

Morningstar

which I am very happy about..it's about damn time someone decides to make a fanlisting for that song cuz it is such a beautiful song =D Alright so..enough of my rambling im out, later =D --Lizzy--[Deadjournal] | [Plug]

(8) are dancing in the dust

October 1, 2003

[EDIT]

Ok Im taking my blog down because it was wayyy too long and for some reason my ftp is not letting me write anything else on to my notepad sorry kids..if ya wanna know what happened just drop me a line on AIM @ dancinginurdust or email me at lizzy@dancing-in-your-dust.net and ill be sure to tell you everything...you can still click the pics and look at those if you like =D

[/EDIT] Happy October..new layout in spirit of Halloween..ill have loads more halloween ones than this..being as this is my fave holiday =D

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17, 18,21,  22,  23,  24,  25 click here for autographs =D --Lizzy--[

Deadjournal

] | [

Plug

]

(7) are dancing in the dust

[lonelyshrimp]

What happened with your roomies if you don’t mind me asking...?

 Yknow what I’m in a mood and they don’t know my tumblr (haha they think I’m a cisstraight girl lol) so let’s get into some shit. Imma put everything under a read more bc imma rant a bit and this is gonna get long.

TW: food, unsanitary (general things not being kept clean, typically bathroom and kitchen related), drug use, fighting, slurs

tl;dr if you dont feel like reading this beast:

They steal what food i dare leave out in the kitchen rather tan keep in my room

They slam doors excessively, fight, yell horrible things to each other, have friends over yelling at like 2 am (last night for example)

Leave the doors unlocked and open?? We cant even lock the front door anymore??? (Dw the doors to our rooms all have locks. If I’m in my room or out of the house, my door is locked)

Constantly throw around the r slur. Like. All the time. Including one person having called me it. Y i k e s

One person keeps smoking in the house even though i’ve asked numerous times (and even have a note on my door) asking people to please smoke outside, it gives me headaches. You are physically hurting me stop.

Don’t Clean Anything. The kitchen is a wreck. The toilets are constantly clogging, I Am In Hell.

For context: the house is a one story house divided into a main floor and finished basement. It’s a rooming house and the basement is largely seperate from upstairs. (They have a kitchen door that they keep closed and locked.) The stairs to the basement are split into two smaller flights, with a landing in between the floors. That’s where the side door is. The public spaces upstairs are the kitchen (connects to stairs), the hallway, and the two bathrooms (big main one, tiny water closet by the front door). The rest of the upstairs is split into five rooms. For comprehension sake, we’ll call my roommates: The Couple (M&F), A, T, and J.

Mmkay lets start with the least egregious and move our way up, shall we? Theft! Of anything and everything! No one can have anything out in the public areas if they actually care about it. It. Will. Get. Stolen. Now, I have a mini fridge and the second biggest room here, so I’m lucky in that 99% of my groceries, as well as all my other belongings, fit in my room. There’s just a wee problem: I don’t have a freezer. Not to fear, past naïve me thought, I’ll just clean out and use the locked freezer since I still have the keys for that fridge! (We have two fridges and food theft was a problem beforehand and so me and my friend who lived here cleaned out the second fridge to use as our own and kept it locked.) I decided to do this after I had bought myself some ice cream, wrote my name on the top, and put it in the main freezer. I go to have some ice cream later that week, I open the tub for the first time (as in I removed the seal holding the lid onto the tub) to find that someone eaten half the tub of ice cream while making it seem like it hadn’t been opened. I know it happened at home bc the spoon marks were clear as day and I have to walk 20 minutes back from the grocery store. That woulda melted by then (Also I would’ve noticed at the store that. The tub was hella lopsided??? And way too light???) So yea of course I’m ticked now, I spent 6 bucks on that bro like just ask or get ur own??? So I put it the other freezer, and for a while it’s fine. Next month I decide to treat myself to some frozen waffles and some chicken strips and come home to find that the hinges holding the locks onto the doors of the fridge were torn out of the fridge/freezer doors. Like. The screws were pried outta this metal door rendering the locks completely useless (to the point i wouldn’t even be able to put the hinges back on.) And the cherry on top?? My ice cream was gone!!! Hope u enjoyed it, asshole. So whatever. Fine. I put my food away and. a week later?? Im like “Man i could go for some waffles rn”. I bought 2 8 packs. One chocolate chip, one cinnamon (y’all i literally buy the cheapest ones Zehrs sells. 2,19$ a box y’all. not even eggos). Surprise surprise!! The entire box of choccy chip ones GONE. Mind u, i wrote my name on all of these boxes, as well as a very large “DO NOT EAT”. so i begrudgingly had a couple (note that, 2) cinnamon waffles and move on. A couple days later I go to have some more and. The waffles are completely gone. Out of a total of 16 waffles, ya boy got a solid 2. (It’s worth noting that there was a single waffle left, but at 0,27$ a waffle, I didn’t mind leaving the box on the table with a note basically reading “these are cheap af, buy ur own bitch”.) (I didn’t swear that much tho)

I’d add the bike to the list but i can’t confirm nor deny that one of my roommates stole my tires and seat off my bike (although M does work on bikes all the time so man idk.)

Next up: wow people here are l o u d. I’m talking slamming doors all the time, slamming things around, yelling, playing music wildly loud. It’s awful. Like. You can just. Close the door quietly? Stop slamming things around please? It’s awful because loud sudden noises make me panic and lemme tell ya, wakin up at eight am bc your a-hole roommate decided to slam the door eight times bc the front door is broken because someone took the border around the jamb off instead of fixing it so we can actually?? lock that door?? because it doesnt quite fit in the jamb and so the only wat to lock it was the chain lock and. someone took that too so thats fun :)))))). The side door isn’t that much better. We have a code lock and. No One Ever Locks It. Like. I’ll come outta room and?? It’s just open????? Close the door???????????

The worst, however, is the fucking fighting. The Couple love to argue all the time. and yell at each other and slam the doors or smashing shit and they yell pretty awful things to each other. Like. I’ve heard M call his gf some awful shit. It’s worse when they have people over too. The other day there were like. 14 cops in here bc of them at like 2 am. Cue me, 2 am, trying to watch a livestream and seeing like??? Six cop cars pull up????? Wh a t????? Not fun not good for my brain.

God and. What is with everyone and the r slur??? Like what?? there are so many words you can choose stop using that word. Like okay the other night someone?? took the dc adapter for the wireless modem and one of the dudes downstairs as well as the couple were looking to see if they had a compatible dc adapter and so i just decided to wait?? and i just spaced out a bit okay whatever i was lookin at the wall like i do and fuckin. the couple had a couple friends over and one of em was chillin between the kitchen and the hall and M yells out from his room “Hey don’t you feel weird with this creepy ass bitch standing next to you? Like what is she, m*ntally r*tarded?” like wow okay dude i’m literally not doing anything. Luckily his friends reaction was basically “?? She lives here?? She can stand there if she wants??” (wow referring to myself as she feels weird and wrong).

A big problem I have is I feel like theres a community in this house that I just don’t fit into? Part of it is I’m like. the only person here who doesn’t do drugs of any kind?? Like I have nothing against ppl who use drugs like whatever bro, but it feels super othering to me when i can’t relate to anyone here because of it. That and. Getting T in particular but really just anyone but A to respect me asking that if you’re going to smoke anything to do it outside because weed and to a lesser extent cigarette smoke trigger my sensory disorder and causes me pain and causes sensory overload and I still find myself asking people to smoke outside.Like I’ve never been unreasonable and said “no drugs in the house” or some bs. I’m just asking u to respect my disability thanks.And like?? I’ll get into this in a second but there were needles in the toilet?? Bro throw them out properly.

And now: Hell.

Can no one clean up after themselves?? Do your dishes. If theres food left on your plate, throw it out first, don’t dump it in the sink. Seriously the kitchen sink is fucked. The kitchen is gross. The microwave ugh ugh ugh no thanks. No one can clean everything. This is why all my cookware and dishes are in my room. That way I can make sure I 1) Still Own It and 2) Its clean and usable. I clean them as I go and just use my own shit.

Nothing compares to the bathrooms, though. It seems like every other day one of the toilets are clogged. Last week there were spoons in the sink?? Like at least 10 spoons. In the bathroom sink. The floor is dirty because no one owns a mop and?? there was one in the kitchen?? I haven’t seen it in like a month. And the worst of all. Okay, it’s really bad when every one up here is between like. 16 and 19 I think? And I had to put up a sign in the bathroom asking people to flush when you’re done??? And I still have to flush before I can use the washroom???? And it feels like every week or so. The toilet’s clogged. Oh! I forgot to mention that the water closet doesn’t even have a doorknob anymore. Someone took it. But wait, it gets worse. Seriously if extremely unsanitary things bother u, stop reading now.

Twice in the past month I’ve had to contact the landlord because the toilets were beyond clogged. The first time was bad but oh lord nothing compares to the second time (aka last week). The first time was your pretty standard toilet clogs and backs up and its very gross. I contacted the landlord and it was fixed the next day and it was fine. For. Two Days. Im serious. See. People here have a real issue it seems of “The person before me didn’t flush so neither will I”, leading to a toilet bowl full of like. a half a roll of toilet paper and waste. F u n. What that led to was the toilet clogging, people not doing anything about it, and continuing to use it. Eventually the toilet bowl was full, so trow a shopping bag over the lid to mark the toilet as “Out of order” and move on to the other one.Both toilets were completely unusable. I emailed the landlord and i don’t know if either they or one of the people living here contacted them, but the old landlord and old property manager were here the other day to clean them out and fix them?? and yea among all the standard waste you’d expect in a toilet, there were needles? Like buddy theres a trash can right there? I know u had the needle caps bc they were in there too. just... disgusting...

bro this is just what i can think of off the top of my head i know theres more but oh no this is so long now. just. this is a lot more detail than u wanted but i wanted to get this out of my brain??

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Episode 2: Rebecca...She’s back, I guess?

So I got hella sick this week so it’s...just one update this weekend. The rest of the next update has the caps done but then the copy I was putting together got very distracted about which Founding Father was the hottest and I think that was the Dayquil? I barely know what day of the week it is rn. I think it’s Saturday, is it Saturday?

Anyway, we’re battling that Monocle guy. Gurimo? Yeah his name is Gurimo. I honestly can’t remember him saying his name even once, so thanks Google for the help.

It’s a new season so not only did we suck all the power out of God Cards but now you can’t use them anymore with the new glowing green mechanic. The writers really did just...a lot to make it so God Cards are no longer relevant. Like they buried them so far.

This guy repeats himself quite a lot about being soul hungry? Yeah I watched all of Sailor Moon so like, I’m super up to date on my soul energy anime. I’ve walked this path before I know it well.

(read more under the cut)

Such a shame we can’t read those stats which may just be Hebrew letters in lorem ipsum (note that when Pegasus makes you a card, you don’t get to have stats) but it’s nice to know that, if you wanted to, you could play Rex and Weevil in universe of the show and something would happen.

Anyway, Gurimo lost, his eyes went all glowy red at some point, and decided to go out throwing stuff because it’s Yugioh and you have to throw cards at least 3 times a season, its in the contract.

Don’t think about physics guys, just trust that cards can do this on a roof where there’s no wind for some reason.

And then he went up in a green ball of glory. It was nice of the green beam of soul energy to wait until the impossible card toss was over.

Lol this show and how it just kills people on screen just...all the time. All the freakin time. Can’t show a gun, but murder as many people as you like. It’s OK, his soul is in a paper card so he’s not *really* dead. That won’t terrify children under the age of 10.

So Pharaoh decides to do the tactic of telling a bunch of motorcycle gang edgy kids (adults? not sure about those three) that stealing is Wrong.

They also, youknow, are implicit in murdering Rex and Weevil but youknow, stealing is wrong and the God Cards don’t belong to them and Pharaoh is shook that these kids won’t keep their end of their bargain that whoever wins the card fight keeps the cards.

So basically Gurimo died for freakin nothing.

Welcome back to the fold, Rex and Weevil, apparently this show isn’t done with you yet. I was pretty much done with both of you 3 seasons ago but alas, you will be back, with your raspy as hell voice acting, at the beginning of S5. I am sure of it.

(PS I just noticed I spelled resurrect wrong and I know I should go back into photoshop but like...I’m too sick to care at this moment so maybe I’ll change it in the next week or so I dunno, I’m just gonna post this thing so I can feel like I did something productive today.)

And so these kids decide the police are never going to freakin show up to the rooftop brawl where a guy super died and several children were endangered and a huge beam of light you can see from space went out like a bat signal to the rest of the city of “ps, something bad is happening over here, if any of you adults feel like helping out these four high school drop outs? Nobody?”

First, they decide to keep this horrible thing:

(which second thought is not SO surprising, because Yugi clearly loves hoarding dead people)

And then this other horrible thing:

Why would you keep these? Why would you do this?

I mean Yugi’s got such specific dark tastes that I wouldn’t be half surprised if his closet is filled with dozens and dozens of rat skulls he collected from the subway station.

And then the next day, Yugi decided to just like watch Joey and Tristan dangle Rex and Weevil like puppets. It just seemed super unnecessary.

Like Yugi isn’t even Pharaoh right now but he’s absolutely fine with these guys getting shook around. Yugi is all sorts of gray area in this show and I’m glad that’s never changed although sometimes it’s like “Is Yugi slowly turning into a mob boss? Because I’m down, but also somewhat concerned?”

Anyway, the God Cards aren’t even here anymore so we say farewell to Rex and Weevil who seem just as confused at how the hell you can steal a God Card as we are.

*not entirely sure where Rex and Weevil are from. I’ve been assuming the UK or the US but like...maybe they live here? I don’t even know.

And then Chibiusa--I mean Rebecca showed up.

Ah, remember this plot point from S1? What if she shows up and (according to Bro) Just never leaves?

I’m coming to terms with this. Anyway, Rebecca’s only purpose seems to be as a part of a (love????) triangle (square????) between Yugi and Tea but like...

And maybe this is the Dayquil speaking but...

Is this even weird?

Seriously, they’re family friends, why is this weird? Maybe it’s because one of Rebecca’s core traits is that she’s American and I’m also an American so I don’t even see a problem with Rebecca and how she acts (since she’s a freakin child with a crush on a card-famous person) but like what small child see her friend she hasn’t seen in 2 years and is not going to hug him?

Anyway, Yugi was the worst to not remember this chick. Maybe his brain looks like a box of loose packing peanuts (I say as a metaphor remembering that his brain literally looks like an Escher painting screensaver), but he can’t remember this chick from just 2 years ago that he gave his rarest card to? The chick who’s grandfather had that blue-eyes he gave to Yugi’s Grandfather? The chick who’s grandfather helped his grandfather get that necklace around Yugi’s neck? The necklace he wears every single day and is super cursed by?

How do you forget the Hawkins when they are part of the reason everyone thinks you’re losing your mind?

But I guess she looks older now and got a pair of glasses (bifocals????). She No longer has her hair in pigtails but, I dunno, she looks basically the same to me since she’s still about the same size as Yugi but wtv.

And then Yugioh was like “Listen everyone, we’re very tired of all of your angry reviews, and I see y’all are saying we never do romance, well get ready, we know how to do romance really well, get ready for it, we can make things move faster than a snail in wet cement, just watch.”

Because somehow, after Yugi was the biggest asshole ever to Rebeca, I guess she figured like “well, at least you’re still card famous”

You know what? I have several girlfriends who I am not dating, but, if it’s been a couple weeks since they’ve seen me last, will give me a huge as drunk hug on my arm and go “MY LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND MARRY ME” and like...Again I’m American so maybe this is just my culture here in California?

I’d like to believe that Rebecca is just messing with these people because she can.

Ps I’m pretty sure this girl was 6 last time we saw her but they decided...we better age her up if it’s gonna be a romance but they only made her 12. OK show. Yugi’s pushing 17 at this point so like...barely even logical. I’d say legal but I’m thinking more of just logic at this point because the last time we saw this girl she was holding a teddy bear (which we can guarantee is probably still shoved into her luggage)

...OK, show...

Now listen listen listen. All ships are fine here. I’m not gonna go after shipping because like, c’mon, it’s 2019. If you stan Rebecca and Yugi, go for it, why not? I’ve said it before, and my feelings haven’t really changed, I’m immune to shipping, so I feel absolutely no different with Rebecca and Yugi than I do with Tea and Yugi. I think Tea makes more sense, but that’s not saying very much because literally anyone else on this cast who isn’t related to him could probably work. Go ahead and bring back Mako Tsunami. There’d be a fun pair.

Bro got very excited when I mentioned a MakoxYugi pairing just now ps.

But it really does feel like this ship has the dynamic of the Usagi/Chibiusa/Mamaru ship from Sailor Moon where Usagi was always jealous of small little Chibiusa spending time with Mamaru who was her OWN DAD. Why would you EVER be jealous of a 12 year old girl hanging with your boy...friend? Tea is a 17ish year old ballerina who never, ever wears full pants. She’d have this in the bag if she ever decided to like...do anything with...this. And I don’t blame Tea for never doing anything with “this” because like...look at “this.”

I just don’t think the writing team knows how to write a competent love triangle (square) but...this exists now. They even had Rebecca decide to dress nearly identically to Tea as a demonstration of her devotion but like...it honestly comes off more that this small child just admires Tea. Because she’s 12.

Yugi is just babysitting this girl for his Grandfather and it feels like the writing team just had to have the girls be all catty at eachother. Because it’s a kids show. Gotta have those girls all catty. Can’t let them be friends.

Anyway, back at this museum that these kids visit so freakin often, you’d think they’d change their home address, we meet up with the granddads in question.

Ah, now Ishizu is no longer with us, Exposition Grandpa is here to take the torch. Can’t wait for that.

And I made his font gray because I freakin give up. Grandpa Hawkins might change his font color every episode. I...I’m figuring it out.

And then, every helicopter in Domino shed a single tear.

Wow. I’ve been so mad for so many seasons that they never use a freakin seaplane to cross the ocean that when they actually do I’m like...kind of disappointed?

I mean it’s not shaped like a dragon, but I will take this perfectly acceptable seaplane.

I can’t believe they drew a normal ass plane. on this show.

*Waits patiently for it to turn into a blimp next episode*

Anyway, if you just got here, this is a link to read all the caps in chrono order. There’s over 3 seasons of this. Y’all I’ve done over 100 episodes.

[thelionshoarde]

Voltron legendary defender, Shance, "Hey Beautiful. Oh $hit, wrong beautiful!" (You don't have to censor the swear if you're comfortable using it)

THIS IS SO LATE, but your prompt inspired an au where the galra never pick up the kerberos team and now shiro has to deal with being back home, not being as over adam as he thought he was, sick again for the first time in a while, and with the WHOLE WORLD now aware of his disease because sanda is a dick! And also most definitely some adorable shance. (or at least, i consider it adorable. there will be duck videos!!!) a thousand pardons for the tardiness, i kept waiting until i finished the whole fic but i’m hella slow and i just keep ADDING THINGS instead

anyway, this is JUST the scene with your prompt in it lol

psa: i focused mostly on ms rather than polio when researching for shiro’s disease, but 1) i need to do a lot more research and 2) i have no personal authority or experience over this topic (tho i do have some experience with chronic illness), so while i am trying to be respectful and realistic about what shiro in this circumstance might be dealing with, please remember that i know nothing about anything, thank you

��Hey, Captain!” called a grinning engineer, coveralls down about her waist. “Good to see you up and about!”

Ah.

Shiro let his shades fall down, slapping against the sides of his nose with gentle pressure. He angled a grin and a wave, and said, “Hey yourself,” and was content to shove his hands into the pockets of his jacket and amble on over toward a big beauty all by herself on the far side.

He had been hoping not to be recognized.

More than that, he had been hoping not to be recognized in direct correlation to his disease. It wasn’t as though it weren’t a part of him, obviously -- he had to deal with it, he had to adjust the world around him to factor it in. It was there, always. But there had been a reason he’d kept it so under wraps. Shiro preferred when it was only ever acknowledged as an afterthought -- he wanted people to see him, not some version of him distorted by sickness.

At least the ‘ships were still beautiful and the summer breeze nice. He made it through the rest of the ‘yard without incident, taking a slow, curving path toward what looked to be a Corona Class vessel. Bulky, heavily shielded, made to withstand longer bouts of radiation than most of the fighters. Her cargo bay was a massive belly on the back half of her fuselage; she had to be hell on turns. And she was just as beautiful close up as she’d been at a distance. Even with his sunglasses on half of the ‘ship was a glare of sun on metal too bright to see through. It didn’t bother him; he knew a good freighter when he saw one.

Shiro came to an unsteady, grateful stop in the shadow of her nose, trying to ignore the way the world had slowly started spinning lopsided on its axis on the way over. He really should have brought his cane, but also: fuck his cane.

“Hello gorgeous,” he called up to the cockpit, nearly as bulbous as her cargo bay.

To his surprise, a voice called back: “You flatterer!”

Startled, Shiro took a step backward and nearly lost his footing, muscles not quite responding how they ought. Damn. He hadn’t realized there was anyone here. The ‘ship had been quiet the whole way over, and -- oh.

That was a torso and head rearing up from the cockpit, the top of which was apparently popped.

Shiro hadn’t been able to tell with the sun shining through the quartz glass at this angle. Ohhh shit, Shiro thought, embarrassed, as the person leaned down over the side of it and laughingly said, “I could say the same to you, Captain! I did not expect to see you here.”

“I didn’t mean you,” Shiro muttered, but he had a feeling his voice had carried with the wind because the shadowy blob nearly twenty feet overhead snickered a little. So Shiro said, louder, “I was talking to the ‘ship. I can’t even see you.”

“Just a minute and I can fix that!” the voice said, cheerily enough.

Shiro squinted through his shades, still embarrassed, and watched as the figure disappeared back into the ‘ship. The cockpits on freighter class vessels were only released for maintenance or in the case of critical emergencies out in the black. That high up in the air it wasn’t feasible to get in and out of in anything less than zero-G. A moment later and the cargo door dropped open with a creaking groan beneath the ‘ship’s high-mounted tail.

Shiro considered turning around and wandering off the way he’d come. But --

He had left the apartment because he couldn’t stand to be there, trapped. He had never felt trapped inside a spacecraft, though, even one that was grounded. And what was one person versus a whole Garrison full of them, which he’d have to traverse again if he wanted to leave. He’d been stopped only once on the way out here, yes, but there was no telling how many might stop him a second time.

And besides. He was pretty certain he wasn’t going to be able to make the walk without issue, if the numbness spreading through his shoulder, now, was any indication.

Fuck, this was awful. What was the best option here? Suddenly he felt tired all over again, weary and worn down, hating how something once so simple had become so complex. He’d just wanted to see the damn spaceships. Fuck this relapse, and fuck himself for not putting on the damned pump when his doctor had told him to.

“Hey, Captain!” the voice called once more, peering out at him, crouched absurdly halfway down the lowered ramp. “Do you want to check my girl out or not?”

The grin smudging against the corners of his mouth in response to that casual, boasting question was all the reason Shiro needed to feel better about staying right here, at least. Hands in his pockets, Shiro carefully ambled on over to the back half of the ‘ship, working hard to keep it natural looking. “Corona Class, right? I recognize the body type, but I didn’t realize there were any still in active use. There were only, hm… three? Before I left for Kerberos.”

“Yup. Helen’s the last one standing. And she’s been refitted, too, so she’s super sexy. I bet you’ve never seen anything like her.”

Snorting, Shiro finally came around aft and put a cautious foot up on the heavy metal of the cargo door, converted into a ramp here where it had thumped into the ground. “I bet I haven’t,” Shiro agreed peaceably enough. He always enjoyed it when pilots were a little in love with their ‘ships. Somehow it made him trust them more.

“Come on, come on, get up here! I never thought I’d get to show off for Captain Shirogane, I’m about to pee myself in excitement here, come on.”

“Whoa,” said Shiro, brows skyrocketing and finding a hand thrust down to help him up the ramp. The sight made something tighten inside his chest, and it was on the tip of his tongue to protest that he didn’t need any help, thank you, he knew his way around a fucking freighter. But then he followed that hand up to the man it apparently belonged to and recognized him.

“Oh,” said Shiro, startled. “You’re -- Ensign Maine, right? From the uh. The press conference?”

The ensign had risen from his crouch and come to stand sideways, staring back into the belly of the ‘ship. His hand was wiggling in impatience, and considering his past experience with this particular ensign, Shiro had the sudden, strong impression that it hadn’t been held out in deference to Shiro’s potential delicacy, and instead simply because he was eager to get Shiro in and started on the tour and this was the compromise to coming down, grabbing Shiro by his jacket, and hauling him bodily up the ramp.

Huh.

Shiro was about to go ahead and take that hand, because he could probably use the help even if he didn’t want it, and this kind of offer was far more palatable than his first assumption. But at the question, the ensign squawked, swinging around to face him. Standing farther up the incline as he was, it put him taller than Shiro, and his eyes were dark and wide, mouth gaping open in ridiculous, dramatic affront. “Maine,” he said, indignant. “That -- totally not my name, oh my god. Have you thought -- ? Agh! And all this time I’ve been so excited that I actually talked to you and you didn’t even know my name, what --”

Shiro reached up and snagged the ensign’s hand in his, tugging hard, just to get him to shut up. And also maybe because he wanted to. Just a little. Smirking, Shiro said, “I still remember you. Sorry I got the name wrong. What is it?”

He would have looked for himself, but for whatever reason this ensign seemed determined to make it impossible to see the damned name sewn onto his clothes. He was in orange again today, but this time it was a dirty coverall, the upper portion shrugged off to revealed toned biceps and forearms and what appeared to be a firm chest beneath a too-tight white undershirt. Happily, it was still just bright enough on the ramp that Shiro hadn’t had to take off his sunglasses, so the guy wouldn’t be able to tell where Shiro’s gaze was lingering. He let himself appreciate the way the ensign’s bicep bulged like a softball as he took Shiro’s weight, standing firm.

Nice.

“McClain,” said the man, now grinning down at him. It was a very white grin, big and bright in a lean, handsome face, and Shiro finally reached up to twitch his sunglasses atop his head, because Ensign McClain was officially pretty enough for eye-candy and -- yep, those eyes were blue, dark and a little wicked with that glint in them.

“Nice to meet you, Ensign McClain,” Shiro said.

McClain waggled his brows and drew Shiro a little closer, up half a step onto the ramp. “The pleasure, Captain,” he teased, “is all mine. Trust me on that one.”

[joyxsoul]

han jisung as ur boyfriend

-lmao there’s so many of these, but here’s another !! (highschool au rlly lol)

-okay, so u two met at school in ur senior year. he was a class clown type, always making jokes, being loud with his friends annoying every one of his teachers along the way.

-bUt, you made him soft !! like the instant he saw you, a little smile was on his face, making his friends (especially his best friend Felix) tease lil jisung, wondering who, or what could have made him this flustered

-i mean, he stopped talking for a full two hours after he saw you, your power

-anyways !!

-you had a couple of classes together, being history and english, and jisung just loved to watch you whenever there was free time between lectures

-it sounds hella creepy (it kinda was), but the way you scrunched your nose when you were concentrated, or your smirk when you finally figured something out or finished a project made his heart jump in his chest

-you were making THE han jisung shut up

-(like i said, your power :3)

-eventually, he grew the courage to talk to you (which included a pep talk from all of his closest friends, making him stand in front of the mirror and scream, “YOU ARE THE SHIT !!”)

-his tactic was to start with a pick-up line, a very classy, “on a scale of one to america, how free are you tonight ?” 

-hyunjin cringed listening to that one, seungmin was sure jisung had blew it and was gonna beat his ass after

-you were a bit surprised; you two weren’t in the same friend group and you hadn’t been seated together at any point

-but you DEFINITELY knew who he was bc who in this school didn’t know his group (a weird combination of crackheads, intellects, and stoners)

-i’ll let you decide who the stoners are in skz ;)

-being as easygoing as you were, you just laughed, responding with “are you from tennessee ? because you’re the only ten i see”

-jisung thought he was going to piss his pants he was so nervous 

-glad that he hadn’t completely ruined his image in front of you, he pulled out the empty chair beside you and struck up a conversation, most likely something related to the substitute asleep at the teacher’s desk

- you guys began to talk more often, working together on various projects, “studying” in the library (all it was was him pointing out random people in a textbook and saying, ‘that’s you’), and sitting together at lunch

-one night, he was facetiming you about homework for your history class. it was probably around 10 pm, and he spent most of the call complaining about how the pizza place messed up his order and gave him pepperoni instead of cheese 

-he had this gray hoodie on; he looked so tired and you constantly fussed over how he should get some more sleep, but he looked so cute in-

-wait did you just call him cute

-you couldn’t lie, jisung was attractive; his almond shaped eyes, his heart shaped mouth, his fluffy long hair, how his nickname was ‘quokka’ due to his face and his personality, how he texted you every morning and night, the way he said your name-

- “y/n ? is something wrong ? stop staring at my face.”

-oh shit you have a crush on han jisung

- “i told you to stop staring !! what, you have a crush on me or something ?” you shook yourself out of it, staring at him through the screen with wide eyes

-he was playing with the strings of his hoodie, his hair being messy with all the times he ran his hand through it. it was a habit you always rolled your eyes at; he’d obviously spend time in the mornings to make it look nice, only for him to ruin in ten minutes into talking about the cold war

-your other friends (wendy and lucas in particular) always teased you about your relationship with jisung

-”DO YOU SEE THOSE PUPPY EYES ?? LOOK AT HIM STARING AT YOU! !”

-”lucas please shut up.”

-but when you did look, jisung was staring at you, his smoothie straw hanging out of his mouth

-you couldn’t help but laugh at how dumb he looked

-and wow, you almost thought you saw his cheeks turn pink when you giggled 

“i know i wasn’t the only one who saw that.�� lucas was looking like he was going to cry, wendy just looked fed up

-you didn’t know when your crush on him started. in those seconds of silence where you and jisung were just ogling at each other through the phone camera, you reflected on where it could’ve all gone wrong

-was it the time he held your hand when he was walking you home when an older man got too close for your liking ? or was it the time you were hanging out at his house and he fell asleep on your lap, only to smile in his sleep when you began running your fingers through his hair ? or was it the time when you two went out for boba tea when the waitress said you were a cute couple, only for him to smile and say, “thank you.”

“..y/n ?”

-”jisung, i have a crush on you.”

-silence

-pure silence

-oh my god, you messed everything up. the screen had gone black, you didn’t hear anything. building up your courage, you actually saw that he had hung up the phone, the numbers taunting you. 

-call ended  2:29

-you didn’t know what to do. your body felt numb, all sounds muted. you could only focus on a car passing by, a bird flying against the wind, the soft raindrops against the window.

-what are you supposed to do ? you had just lost the one person who you cared about the most. you two had known each other for a little over two months, but you'd already grown extremely close. you told him everything, he trusted you.

-and you fucked up a perfect, amazing friendship.

-the rain was getting heavier now, but you didn’t mind. it was always comforting to listen to, especially when you felt upset. your parents weren’t home until sunday, and as it was a saturday night, you had plenty of time to cry it out.

-”Y/N !!”

-god, you were going crazy, you swore you just heard jisung’s voice

-”Y/N !! PLEASE LET ME IN ITS RAINING AND I’M TIRED”

-dumbfounded, you looked out your bedroom window to find jisung, still wearing his gray hoodie, a little drenched, with pebbles in his hand

-oh wow he rlly went full rom com with this one

-rushing downstairs, you pulled open the front door, only to be attacked by a hug from jisung, giggling to himself in glee

- “i got here as fast as i could, i need you.” with that, he pressed his lips against yours, still wet from the rain. he smiled into it, letting out a chuckle when you kissed him back. you pulled away quickly though, the blush on your cheeks turning into a full on tomato. jisung pouted, you poking his face as he flushed pink

- “in case you couldn't tell, i like you too. thought it was obvious.” he elbowed you, leading you up to your room while muttering “this isn’t real, this isn’t real”

-”you sleepy ?” you asked, making room for him on the bed. he just nodded, saying the homework could wait

-it was a little past midnight, and all you wanted to do was sleep. you climbed in, turning off all the lights, feeling jisung’s arms snake around your waist. he put his head into your neck, humming a song that wasn't familiar. just feeling his breath on your neck was making you drift off

- “goodnight sunshine, i’ll see you in the morning.” he placed a lazy kiss on your cheek, and drifted off.

-when it came to you two actually dating, no one was surprised (except mark, but he was oblivious at the best of times). the rest of skz couldn’t care less about what you looked like; they all knew how happy you made jisung and really, that’s all that matters

-jisung was always clingy, but dating him made it worse. he was always nearby, wanting to hold your hand, wanting to play with your fingers; basically any excuse to touch you. if you don’t like pda, he would definitely respect that, it made all those moments you shared with him that much more special

-he always had a nickname for you, but ever since you had first met, ‘sunshine’ had stuck. you never knew why, but jisung just thought you glowed, even at 3 pm on a school day or 7 am on a weekend because wow he loves you

-more than anything, he loved when you played with his hair, whether you were just touching it, or running your hands through it

-he might have liked it a bit too much, but uh you were not ready to venture down that path

-jisung would also spray his cologne on all of the hoodies he gave you because he knows how much you love it

-you have SO MANY OF HIS HOODIES IN YOUR HOME

-it’s not funny

-you keep telling him to take them back, but he doesn’t want them ?? “cooties bro. can’t.”

-you aren’t complaining, they’re comfy >:((

-jisung teases the ShiT oUt OF yOU

-like one day you came into class with your friend acting cute in an attempt to steal some of her hot cheetos

-only to have HEADASS just stare at you blankly, exclaiming “you look mentally unstable” while he laughed at you

-this along with doing middle school boy shit

-i’m talking taking your notebook and hiding it in another spot of the classroom, scaring you in the hallway, making you pull worksheets out of his hands while he passed them out

-think of ANYTHING that gives off middle school boy energy, he’s done it

-as annoying as he is

-he loves you. a lot. like, his main goal in your relationship is to make sure you’re happy with him, that you aren’t going to leave him because he isn’t putting the effort in

-you keep assuring him you love him, that you’d never do that to him. but no matter how many times he nods, or smiles

-there’s uncertainty in his eyes. because of that, he always assures you how beautiful you are, stays up all night if he has to when you pull an all nighter to study, gives you all the hoodies he can provide

-not only because he feels like he has to, but he’d do anything to see you happy; no matter how tired he feels 

-it breaks his heart to see you upset

-one day, you had gotten a test back while hanging out at jisung’s house, trying to help him study. you opened your score and your heart dropped. a 59%. that’s the worst you’d ever done. you had stayed up multiple nights to study, putting off your own personal needs in order to success

-it wasn’t enough. and that hurt

-jisung saw you start to cry and he  f r e a k e d

-oh god, his precious sunshine was crying and he didn’t know what to do

-he fumbled for a bit, saying, “it’s going to be okay !! it’s just one grade !!” only for you to cry harder and him to freak out even more

-eventually, he just hugged you from behind, laying you down on the couch. you were shaking so bad and it was making jisung tear up; he really hated seeing you like this 

-he knew talking wouldn't help, so he let you cry, wiping away your tears and rubbing small circles into your back. 

-”you’re okay sunshine, just hold onto me.” you always thought you didn’t deserve someone like him. someone so loving, so supportive. 

-but you love him. you’ve never loved someone like him; how dumb he sounded but always gave the best advice, always teasing you at any time during the day but shows up in front of your door with flowers just because

-and so when he sings “i smile” while caressing your cheek, you know there’s no place you’d rather be. in his arms, the vibration of his voice lulling you to sleep and just how warm he was

-and when you got to see him perform with the rest of his rapping group, your eyes just couldn’t leave him. his charisma, his confidence, how he’d always wink at you when he spotted you in the crowd. he was truly ethereal there, almost angelic in whatever he wore, because look at him

-almost nothing was better than seeing him backstage after a show to see him; him smirking when he’d pull you into his arms still sweaty when he’d whisper “missed you babydoll”

-no matter how much he’d nag you for staying up too late and not putting enough time into yourself, and no matter how much you’d nag him for not eating enough, you wouldn’t trade each other for the moon and all of her stars

-if soulmates existed, you were lucky enough to find yours in a shitty high school at 9:40 a.m. with a cheesy pick-up line

-but you wouldn’t have it any other way

AGHHHHH i really hope everyone liked this ?? ugh, it feels so rushed, but it’s really late here, so i hope i did sungie justice :((

[atamascolily]

lilyliveblogs “terminator 2″ for the first time, part 2

When we last left off, I was a pile of shipper goo, so time to get back to the movie.

(Part one here)

Someone -- the female doctor we saw before who looks kinda like Sarah? -- watching the video, smoking. I think I can see how Sarah is going to escape now. Oh, wait, it's Sarah, with Dr. Silbermann, watching herself on screen. The two asshole guards are in the background. Her hair's combed. She's subdued. Silbermann is still a jerk.

She wants to see her son. Silbermann's not going to let her, is he? Asshole. She denies crushing a Terminator, their existence, claiming Cyberdyne covered up the evidence. Cut to '90s computer nerds in their cubes, doing experiments that are probably going to trigger Judgment Day. Like you do.

They're doing experiments on "it," and new employee wants to know where "it" came from, so Dyson the manager can tell the audience. "Don't ask," is the answer. Everyone's wearing clean suits, which can't be good. There's a door with two keys that needs two people to open it. Yeah, this really can't be good.

Showdown at the Cyberdyne factory with whatever Terminator goes rogue in here??

Cyberdyne has built a safe for that one little fragment they got from the original Terminator... maybe there are more in different jars; it's a really big vault. Yup, there's the arm. The manager stares at it, and you can see the muscles in his cheek twitch as he contemplates it. He's probably going to die by strangulation at the hands of the Terminator if this movie keeps up with its dramatic ironies.

Of course Silbermann won't let Sarah see her son, so she tries to strangle him with his own tie.

Arnold on a motorcycle spies John Connor on a motorcycle, and the game is on!!

I'm like... 90% certain that's the Los Angeles River that John Connor is cycling down... because it's channeled and running through LA and barely has any water in it and everybody LOVES to film there... going to wiki that later...

Fake police officer asking girls for info about John. They're also delightfully '90s. John is an the arcade, delighting in his ill-gotten funds.

Terminator has disguised his gun as a... box of roses? Did I see that right?

John is playing a fighter simulation that is SO MUCH A CALLBACK TO THE OPENING SCENE WITH ALL THE SHIPS TRYING TO KILL THE HUMANS.

The police dude ASKS THE PUNK FRIEND shows him John's photograph, and the friend says "Nah, I don't know him," BECAUSE HE KNOWS BETTER THAN TO TRUST THE COP. Of course this gets John's attention and they run. And then the friend tries to point the cop in the other direction, but the cop just shoves him aside.

(I'll say this much for the punk friend: he tried. He was a good friend.)

LOL, the fact that John Connor knows better than to trust cops is what saves him. Otherwise, he'd've been a sitting duck. Except he runs right into Arnold...

Arnold flips over the rose box, revealing the gun, and it looks like all hope is lost as the cop comes around the corner... and Arnold tells John to get down and shoots at the cops. His first line in the movie.

When this movie first came out, I bet the audience FLIPPED THEIR SHIT at this twist, but I was a) kinda tangentially aware of it from pop cultural osmosis and also b) that fake cop guy was HELLA SUSPICIOUS, so I'm just like... yeah!!! Because the only way to top being hunted by Arnold was to either a) BE HUNTED BY MULTIPLE ARNOLDS, or b) HAVE ARNOLD ON YOUR SIDE, and of course they went with the latter, because WHY NOT?

the cop's hit but gets back up, John is freaked out, and we the audience realize SOMETHING'S UP. A poor bystander gets murdered as the Terminator uses himself as a human shield to save John, who is screaming...

Arnold busts him into the voltage room out of the way and we have a Terminator on Terminator shoot-out, which is kinda incredible, except that Arnold has a bigger gun, so he gets to keep shooting while the police dude tries to recover from the impact.

That moment where the bullet holes are all silver-y as the police guy re-heals himself, and the CGI is obviously early '90s, but still quite effective and horrifying. And then he gets back up and they start grappling and going through walls AND NOW THEY'RE IN THE '90S MALL, OH MY GOD.

John Connor, not surprisingly, gets the fuck OUT. I wonder if Sarah told him what the Terminator looks like, and if he's surprised to see it defend him?

THE LIQUID METAL TERMINATOR LOOKING AT THE SILVERY-SKINNED MANNEQUINS IN THE MALL DISPLAY OH MY GOD.

LOL random dude snapping photos with his SLR he just happens to be carrying around.

John's motorcycle won't start for reasons of DRAMA, lol.

God, this new Terminator can run freakishly fast, it's inhuman.

Of course no one is going to question a cop chasing anyone, sigh...

(I feel like this movie works eerily well for social commentary in 2019 on SO MANY LEVELS.)

The running terminator runs up to a moving truck and tosses out the driver and keeps driving... wow.

ok, this is all great, but I really want more Sarah, where is Sarah in all this, will she ever talk to another woman in this movie PROBABLY NOT. How about more Kyle Reese flashbacks/dream sequences, can we have those? I am but a simple soul.

Okay NOW there's a chase scene in the Los Angeles riverbed.... that little tiny rivulet in the midst of all that concrete is the river. SOB.

Well, I gotta hand it to the human resistance for sending a Terminator after another Terminator, but it also works because JOHN CONNOR LIVED THROUGH THE EXPERIENCE AND REMEMBERS WHAT THE HELL HIS FUTURE SELF DID... timey-wimey paradox ball...

OH MY GOD THAT LEAP AS ARNOLD'S MOTORCYCLE LEAPS INTO THE RIVERBED. No wonder this movie is so frikkin' famous.

John Connor's bike getting run over by the truck is SO a callback to that tiny little toy truck getting run over by the Terminator in T1...

I like how the police Terminator is so focused on John Connor to the exclusion of ignoring the other Terminator unless he's actively in the way. The intensity in his blue-eyed stare is FANATICAL and inhuman and I love it because it's so gosh darn creepy.

Arnold shoots out the truck's tires, and it catches on FIRE. i love how arnold is prepared to shoot anything that comes out of the flames, but they've bought themselves at least a little time. Of course the CGI silver man comes out of the flames as soon as they leave and melts back to normal. He looks like the frikkin' Oscars statue, only silver.

Even his clothes regenerate back on, which raises interesting and troubling questions as to WHY since he couldn't just re-generate his clothes back on when he came out of the sphere, he had to steal them. I have no clue why this is.

Of course, Arnold and John stop in an alleyway to have their conversation. JOHN KNOWS THIS IS A TERMINATOR, OH MY GOD. (Do you think he feels bad for bad-mouthing Sarah earlier now??)

I think Arnold's talked more in this scene than he did in the entirety of T1, lol. The irony of him being John's father-figure now is just priceless, really.

John handles this much better than Sarah in T1, precisely because this is pretty much EXACTLY WHAT HIS MOM'S BEING TELLING HIM FOR AGES, so at least he has a FRAMEWORK for weird shit like this.

John Connor fighting alongside his own father and re-programming a Terminator to BE HIS OWN ADOPTED FATHER FIGURE OH MY GOD. No wonder he's so fucked up.

Arnold: "The T-1000 would definitely try to re-acquire you there." John: "You sure?" Arnold: "I would."

BAM. That's cold. I love it.

They go to a phone booth, and John doesn't have any quarters because he used them all at the arcade. He's going to try to warn his foster parents because he's not a complete asshole, but I... don't think the T-1000 is interested in killing them? Like, they already cooperated with this dude because he was in uniform. John doesn't seem to GET that not everybody responds to police the way he does.

Arnold slamming the machine to get more quarters is AMAZING and the look on John's face is PRICELESS. Also, parallels to his robbing the ATM earlier...

John's foster parents have a German shepherd that won't stop barking, oh this isn't good... the foster dad doesn't like the dog, which is further proof he's an asshole.Oh, wait, it’s John’s dog, this is probably the same dog we saw with Sarah at the end of T1 or its successor, ahhhhhhhh.

I really feel for Janelle. I feel like she's stuck in a relationship with this asshole Todd, and she deserves better and she's probably going to die, and I'm gonna feel bad about it.

Then we hear a gun cock, and she sticks her arm out, and we realize that holy shit, it's the Terminator mimicking Janelle's face as well as her voice, just like the Terminator did with Sarah's mother in T1, and we realize THAT's why she's being so OOC to John over the phone...

Arnold takes over the call and starts mimicking John's voice. John just stares. I think he's starting to get it.

The T1000 doesn't know the name of the dog. Arnold hangs up and tells John his foster parents are dead. Well, fuck. At least Janelle is dead. Too much to hope that the T1000 didn't just tie her up in the spare bedroom and Todd will find her later after "Janelle" goes to look for John? Sigh.

Nope. No luck. Todd is dead and the T1000 has shifted its arm to be a FRIGGIN' SWORD. Fuck, I didn't know they could do that.

This is supposed to be played as black comedy, but it's just horrific, really, even if the dude was an asshole.

Okay, I get it, the T1000 didn't steal the original cop outfit, he just mimicked it? along with the appearance? That's why he only took the gun. Only the earlier models needed to actually steal clothes.

Oh, good, we cut to Arnold explaining all this to John. Thanks, Cameron!

Oh, and now the T1000's going to kill the dog, right? Because it can. Sigh. And the dog's name is on the collar, so it knows that John knows that it wasn't really Janelle on the phone OR it was talking to a Terminator instead. Clever. Poor doggie. IT WAS TRYING SO HARD. IT DESERVED BETTER.

Sarah is being shown photos of the original Terminator from T1 from the security footage at the police station. Apparently, they saw him on mall footage, too. The police are mad that Sarah has no reaction and I'm like... you spent years telling her she was crazy, and NOW you want stuff from her?? Sigh. Is this the drugs that are responsible for her apathy or is it something else? I think she's contemplating her next move...

Silbermann being an ASSHOLE about it...

Honestly, not sure I blame Sarah for not cooperating given how she's been treated thus far... she knows from experience that even the most well-meaning officers are functionally useless against a Terminator because they don't really GET IT.

But she gets a paper clip. And knowing Sarah, that's all she needs to pick a lock and GTFO.

John says he grew up in Nicaragua as Sarah studied from paramilitary officers throughout Central and South America. He uses the word "shack up," which implies Sarah traded lessons for sex, but I hope... she found some sort of comfort there? It's clear from her hallucination she still desperately loves Kyle. SOB.

John realizes he's been an asshole about Sarah all this time because she WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG. The whole theme of this series is that pretty much everyone except for Kyle TOTALLY BELIEVED SARAH WAS CRAZY, so it's nice to see John finally back on track again. He's younger, so he hasn't been indoctrinated into the patriarchy quite as hard as everyone else in this movie.

of course they're going to go try to bust her out, but she might be out on her own by the time they get there...

But of course the T1000 is going to try to get her so he can copy her and he's going to kill her after that, because that's standard operating procedure. I'm not sure how a T101 would necessarily know that, but maybe he ran into some in the future before he was sent back? Whatever, it sounds plausible.

"Fuck you! She's a priority to me!" YEAH, JOHN, YOU TELL 'EM!!

I like how all these random muscle dudes are all coming over to investigate when John starts shouting about being kidnapped... only to be so confused when he blows them off. I'm sure the T1000 will be around to question them later, of course.

Oh, T101 is programmed to obey John Connor... even the younger version. LOLOLOLOL.

John is such a little shit. YOU CALLED THOSE PUNKS OVER TO HELP YOU, WHY ARE YOU BEING SUCH AN ASS NOW? All you had to do was say "Look, sorry, just a misunderstanding, we're good," and MOVE ON instead of this Macho power trip.

(I take back what I said about John and the patriarchy, btw.)

Oh my god, the random dude who tried to help his friend gets SHOT, WTF JOHN, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU STARTED THIS!!!

In which John Connor learns that Terminators are NOT toys. DAMN STRAIGHT YOU LITTLE PUNK.

Of course the police can get into the state mental hospital without question. The guard doesn't even check ID or ask questions, just waves him through. (It probably saves his life, though.)

AAAAAHHHH, the creepy guard is assaulting Sarah when she's strapped down eww gross please no. I suppose I should be grateful it wasn't anything more graphic than him licking her face. She can't react because she's got the paper clip in her mouth.

(Kyle Reese would be so proud of her right now.)

Ahh, it's night, but everything's so brightly lit. This is going to be freakin' beautiful action scene.

Sarah ties her hair back! This is a symbolic gesture, of course, and a practical one, but also a huge question for me: what is she using for a hair tie? No way they gave her one... what is she improvising with?

AHHHH THE T1000 IS IN THE FLOOR HOLY FUCK THAT'S CREEPY. And that's how he acquired the guard when the guard walked over him. WOW.

So the gun on his hip when he originally shifts is a fake? It's part of him- because the T1000 can't make weapons. So he has to take the guard's gun. I think that's what happened?

It's going to be really hard for me to mourn when that asshole orderly that's assaulted Sarah gets what's coming to him. The only question is whether Sarah's going to get him first.

GOD SARAH CONNOR KICKING ASS IS SO SATISFYING. First the dude who assaulted her, and then Silbermann. Karma's such a bitch, isn't it?

John in his naivete order the T101 not to kill anybody, so he just shoots the guard in the legs instead. John, you'd better be more careful with your wording there....

Oh, goody, another underground parking garage...

Sarah comes face to face with the T101... awkward. She runs away before she sees John, only to get tackled. But the T101 comes to her rescue.

The female guard is the only one to bother him by knocking his shades off, lol.

AAHHHHHH THE TERMINATOR TELLS HER WHAT KYLE REESE SAID TO HER BECAUSE ADULT JOHN CONNOR TOLD HIM IT WAS THE ONLY WAY TO GET HER TO TRUST HIM (and also a freakin' great callback!!!)

Silbermann is watching the whole thing go down, he's probably going to spill it all to the T1000, of course...

Of course the T1000 just walks through the bars. Holy shit Silbermann is never going to get over the fact that Sarah was right all along. This is going to totally break him. Either that, or he'll double down on it.to save face. The only reason he survives is because he stays close to the wall and nobody cares enough to stop and deal with him.

AHHH, THE CGI WHEN HIS HEAD SPLITS OPEN IS BOTH TOTALLY FAKE AND ALSO HELLA CREEPY AND SILBERMANN IS WATCHING ALL OF IT, THEY'RE TOTALLY GOING TO LOCK HIM UP AFTER THIS OH MY GOD, KARMA.

Like, the uncanny valley of '90s CGI totally WORKS here, because it's just so fucking creepy. But it's also another sign that this is action and not horror, because action is less focused on blood and guts and gore--the reality and effects of violence.

Oh, good, they steal a car, because they weren't all going to fit on the motorcycle.

The T1000 has given up all subtlety now, and is just a giant silver amorphous human now. Oh, wait, now they ran out of money and he's human again.

LOLOLOLOL Sarah and T101 making John reload in the back seat because OF COURSE HE KNOWS HOW TO DO THAT, HE'S SARAH'S KID.

Sarah Connor is in her friggin' ELEMENT NOW, boys and girls.

god, it's like crossing the Terminator with Freddie Krueger or something (I almost typed "Freddie Mercury," and that's an interesting slip, given how much like mercury the silver goo reminds me of...)

Ahhh, Sarah hugs John and then lectures him for being stupid and reckless, and John just wants love and support... awwwww, he's trying so hard. I love Sarah, and she loves her son, but they don't always connect...

John doesn't want his mom or the T101 to see him crying, because patriarchy. Sigh.

The T101 sewing Sarah up is such a delicious callback to T1 on so many levels. And then she sews HIM up, oh my god.

BRAIN SURGERY ON A TERMINATOR, WOW.

The CPU of a Terminator is what's in the lab at Cyberdyne that they're experimenting on... which is going to become the core of Skynet... NO WONDER IT TRIES TO KILL EVERYONE, IT'S A FUCKING TERMINATOR AT HEART, IT'S ONLY DOING WHAT IT WAS PROGRAMMED TO DO!!!!

(this explains SO MUCH, honestly)

I wish John asserting his independence was NOT another example of a man telling Sarah Connor what to do, thank you very much. And I hate how she's literally relegated to the back seat, ugh. This is a great example of how horror tropes are more feminist-friendly than action.

John deigning to give his mother money is the most obnoxious thing ever, good for Sarah snatching it out of his hand, counting it, and handing him back a handful. We're supposed to find him endearing and relatable and I just keep wanting to smack him for his sexist bullshit.

Children playing with fake guns at the gas station, like that isn't symbolic of anything. John's seen too much now to take it lightly. Compare the children playing on the playground earlier in the movie with this.

wow, I’m still only halfway through the movie, who knew this was so deep

[jichew]

kim seunghun♡soulmate!au

a/n: this took….WAY TOO LONG to finish. I apologize if this au is not as cohesive bc I did write it over the span of a few weeks lol. Thank you all for waiting so patiently and feel free to leave any requests as I will be free to write this weekend!!! mwah♡

so,, in this alternate universe exists the soulmate tattoo

yes, i know so creative ;w;

essentially, you are born with the name of your soulmate tattooed somewhere on your body

and you have the absolute pleasure of having the name kim seunghun tattooed in cursive across the expanse of your right hip

spicy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

anyway,,, you’re kind of asjsdjkSAD

bc seunghun is such a common name??? and you’ve met so many seunghuns???

but NONE of them are your soulmate :((((

you would know,, considering u basically ripped a guys shirt off when he told u that yes, his name was kim seunghun but no, he did not have ur name on his hip

uhh but that’s a story for another day :,)

anyway,,, ur kinda bummed??

and it’s gotten to the point where you’ve almost lost all hope of finding him

。・°°・(＞_＜)・°°・。

but anyway ,, life goes on I guess

SO

you’re yedam’s older sister by about 3 years

( sorry forgot to mention that important detail )

you both go to the same high school!!!

ur a senior and he’s a FRESHIE

obviously,,, hes a BABY（≧∇≦）

so ur super protective of him

and when you find out he’s been hanging out with some ,, QUESTIONABLE individuals at school

mom mode: activated

“dammie who r these kids”

“MOM, we’re part of dance club together!! they’re super nice i promise”

＼＼\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／

u just want your baby to stay safe u know??

so when he asks to invite his friends over to practice

you’re like ( ˘ω˘ )

yedam: (◞‸◟)

you: (　˙-˙　)

sad yedam is a big fat NO in this household

so you have no choice but to agree

and as his unofficial mom, you decide to greet his friends !

“hi, i’m y/n! bang y/n!” ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

and like ,,,, you lowkey feel bad thinking his friends were bad bc most of the guys are pretty chill

like this byounggon kid??

the epitome of looks like he wants to kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll ( ^ω^ )

but when you get to the last dude ,,,

he just kinda ~looks~ at you

and ur not gonna lie … he’s HOT

like he’s only wearing a hoodie ,, but he has silver hoops lined along his ears,, and his hair just messily grazes across his forehead

you internally: *･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･’(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)‘･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

uhhhh but also he’s staring u down like he wants to kill u

“i’m hun” he introduces himself coldly

(._.)

he still cute tho

so,,, it’s been a while and yedam has continued to bring his friends over to practice

and you’ve come to grow fond of the boys!!!

esp byounggon :,)))

you guys just click???

except,,,, there’s still a certain blonde haired boy who just doesn’t seem to like u???

like u were walking to ur class the other morning

and you just HAPPENED to see him

so u were like,,, hm let me be a nice person today(＾ｰ^)

so you run up to him and grab his shoulder

“hun!!! what’s up my guy!!” ( ＾∀＾)

honestly,, you went in to this thinking that the only thing hun would do is say hi back???

you: WRONG

he kind of freezes for a second

and you’re like???? u ok bud

he slowly turns around

and his eyes,,, literally pierce into yours

he gingerly takes your hand from its grip on your shoulder, letting it limply fall at your side

and then he slowly walks towards you until your back is pressed against the white brick wall of the hallway, his hands caging you in on either side of your head

slowly, he inches his face towards yours

“stop faking nice to me, we are not and will never be friends”

you internally: hnnngg why does he smell so nice???? is that bath and body works? since when did men shop at bath and body works??(΄◉◞౪◟◉｀)

you externally: HMPH how DARE U invade my personal bubble young man i won’t hesitate to FIGHT(● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭

and then he walks off

“FUCK YOU TOO HUN!!! I BET THAT’S NOT EVEN YOUR REAL NAME!! I HOPE U THINK ABOUT WHAT U DID WHEN U GO BACK HOME YOUNG MAN” ＼＼\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／

you are a BIG MAD

like??? who does this kid think he is???

you dont really bother talking to him much after that :///

but also ,, you hate yourself bc you’re still so ATTRACTED to him??? and u don’t even know why??? like bad personalities are such a turn off why ,,???

hmph

ANYWAY

so it’s a saturday night ,,

u know what that means…

party @ byounggon’s place ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

bc what’s a bullet point au w out a party am i right???

basically, gon’s parents were on vacation for the weekend, so he took the chance to have the party of the year

and after the stress of exam season, you’re ready to get SMACKED

lmao i do not support underage drinking kids!

uhhh anyway

this is your first party in a ,, while

so you dress yourself up in a red mini dress and some platform heels and strut your hot ass to gon’s house ;)

by the time you walked up to the house,, it was a full fledged RAGER 😤

so like one second,,, you’re just chilling, shaking your hips to some britney spears

and the next thing you know!! you’re downing your fifth shot of the night

“GON I THIBJK IM GONNA THROW UP”

gon: Σ('◉⌓◉’)

the next thing u know you’re in the bathroom bent over the toilet

(;´д｀)

thankfully,,, you don’t puke

but you do drink atleast five bottles of water and take a power nap on gon’s shoulder

anyway ,,, by the the time you’ve slightly sobered up, you realize your head kinda hurts and the party is still going strong but u promised gon you’d stay to clean up soooo

you end up going upstairs to NAP (ᵔᴥᵔ)

but when you open the door to the guest room at the end of the hall,,,

you just HAPPEN to see hun already there on the bed scrolling through his phone

＼＼\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／

this man rlly just knows how to push ur buttons huh

if you weren’t so tired maybe you would’ve taken the time to appreciate the way his leather jacket complimented his broad shoulders

like not 2 be rude but this bich looked hella good

but also ur tired :///

“what are YOU doing here”

hun finally looks up and notices you standing in the doorway

and he doesn’t say anything for a while

just kinda stares at you

and it takes you a while to realize that he’s lowkey checking you out

you wouldn’t admit it, but the way his eyes glazed over your form made a pit form in your stomach

finally he locks eyes with yours

“what do you mean what am I doing here, what are YOU doing here?”

he smirks and gets off the bed to step closer to you

“i WANTED to take a NAP but you just HAD to take the only room that doesn’t have people FUCKING” (● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾

“well it’s not my fault you can’t handle your alcohol”

this BITCH

“can you PLEASE just leave”

“no”

you let out a sigh of frustration and square your hands on your hips

“why do you hate me so much”

“i never said i hated you”

“well the way you act sure makes it seem like you do” you huff

hun cocks his head a little and steps closer to you

suddenly, it seems like the idea of personal space is almost nonexistant

you look up at him

and u notice the way his hooded eyes rest on your lips

and how the air around you both has suddenly gotten heavier

and you feel your body heating up

and you realize that maybe,,, you’re not so tired anymore

“well how about i prove to you that i don’t”

hun’s voice has reached a whisper, his lips only centimeters from yours

and suddenly he’s kissing you

and you’re kissing back

perhaps it’s because you’re not completely sober that you don’t notice the way his touch burns your hip

and if you do, you ignore it

the softness of his lips against yours almost makes you feel drunk again

and the next thing you know, he’s taking off your shirt, hands finding their way to the curve of your waist

as your lips make their way down his neck, you allow yourself to do the same to him

( you wish you didn’t do that )

because as you push his shirtless body against the bed, you can’t help but notice the cursive scrawl lining his right hip

and in that moment, it feels as if you’ve never been more sober in your life

you’re frozen, eyes resting on his hip

and maybe hun, or should we now say seunghun, is not as sober as he seems, considering it takes him a while to track down the path of your eyes

and when he finally does, his heart drops in his chest

he reaches out to grasp some part, any part, of you

but you flinch away

“y/n…. this isn’t what you think it is”

his eyes are pleading you to stay and listen to him

you let out a harsh laugh

“no, no this is EXACTLY what i think it is”

“y/n please don’t -“

and suddenly you’re untangling yourself from the bed sheets, haphazardly throwing your shirt on and slamming the door behind you  

and in that moment you realize that maybe soulmates aren’t as perfect as the world makes them out to be

so the rest of the weekend is spent in your bed,,, wrapped up in ur sheets like a burrito

you don’t really cry much

you’re just ,,, confused

having the idea that your soulmate knew you were his soulmate but never told you, and better yet, acts like he hates you??

(◞‸◟)

yedam: y/n, why have u been laying in bed all day (● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾

you: ;w;

and as much as dammie wants to talk to you, he has more emotional intelligence than most guys his age (or guys in general tbh)

so he pats your back, makes two bags of popcorn, puts kimi no na wa on his laptop and gets under the covers beside you

it isn’t until the end of the movie when the last of your tears have dried on your face that you look up at him with puffy eyes

“dammie, i found my soulmate”

yedam: Σ('◉⌓◉’)

“it’s not that big of a deal… i don’t think he  wants me anyway”

by the time you reach the end of the sentence, your voice falls into a whisper

perhaps you would like to believe seunghun wanted you

but some things don’t turn out the way we believe

“why would u say that” yedam looks down at you, brows furrowed in worry

“uhh, i mean -“

“WAIT … who even is your soulmate??”

you:👀🍵

“it’s … hun”

“W H A T”

and that, my friends, is how yedam realized u can’t trust people in this world :/

so it’s monday

and as you brush your teeth, you can’t help but feel uneasy knowing that you could possibly see seunghun today

thankfully you don’t

but when it’s finally nighttime and you’re making your way under your covers ,,,

unknown: y/n, open your window

unknown: i’m outside and it’s cold

unknown: this is seunghun btw…

you on the outside: what the FUCK

you on the inside: i’m literally wearing basketball shorts how am i supposed to see my soulmate like this (O_O)

and when you pull back your curtains and open your window, you are met with none other than kim seunghun barreling into your room

“how long were you out there??” (● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾

“uhhh maybe an hour or so” m(._.)m

and perhaps it’s the motherly side of you that decides to pull his face down and cup his cheeks in your hands in an attempt to warm him up

and you don’t really notice how close you’ve gotten to him until you look down and realize his lips are only centimeters from yours

but when seunghun’s lips form into a little smirk at your obviously flustered state, you quickly retract your hands

“i’m sorry…”

you don’t really make a move to respond to seunghun, choosing to stare at the floor instead

“I know what i did was stupid … and i should have told you from the start… but i’ve had bad experiences in the past with soulmates and i didn’t know if -“

“that doesn’t matter, you should have just told me that you didn’t want me in the first place instead of making me feel this way”

you’re a bit pissed off now

that this dude thinks he has the right to act like that and then barge into your room??

but when you take the time to look up at him

his eyes have softened

and he moves a step closer to you

“i do want you though”

… “ w h a t “

“then why have you acted so rude to me?? when you obviously knew i was your soulmate from the start, why did you hide it??”

now seunghun is the one looking down at his hands

and he looks so defeated, before he opens his mouth

“i’m scared”

you look up at him, but he’s still looking down at his hands

“my dad rejected my mom when he found out they were soulmates. i don’t think … he wanted to deal with the commitment of having a soulmate. he thought they were stupid. so he rejected her and he went off to do whatever the hell he’s doing right now. he went off and he abandoned my mom with two year old me and we haven’t heard from him since.”

a single tear drops from his eyes

and you move a step closer and wrap your arms around him

he’s frozen for a second but he hugs you back

and you both stay there for a while, you rubbing his back in an attempt to calm him down

“i won’t ever leave you seunghun”

he pulls back

and despite his red-rimmed eyes and tear stained cheeks, he cups your face with his cold finger tips and kisses you

and you kiss him back

[kvmes]

Another Love TKO

I just read your text post about the dude you liked and it made me think of a situation that happened with me and this girl i had a huge crush on at my college.

I'm pretty sure it was fall semester 2017, i had walked to my building for class like i always did, i had my headphones in like always and was early to my class like always.

(quick side note) idk about you but im introverted, the reason i mention that is because me being as introverted as i am, im very observant.  I notice everything around me, i notice peoples faces, the clothes they wear, im just a very observant person. I dont talk that much, and i never walk around with my face in my phone like everyone seems to do these days, im always, always in deep thought, and deep observation.  

Anyways, i get to class hella early and i have my headphones in and im just chilling, when all of a sudden i see the most beautiful girl i have ever seen at my college, i mean, she was stunning. her hair was curly, and it was in a bun, her skin was golden and she had a bandana that was a mixture of red, black, and green. she had those gold and black suede pumas that was popular around that time.

Her arms were criss crossed across her chest and she was carrying her books. in the 5 seconds it took for her to pass me i picked up her whole vibe. she walked past me and didnt even know i existed. but i didnt give a shit, i was absolutely blown away by how gorgeous this girl was. when i say she was the most THE most beautiful girl i had ever seen at my college... i mean it. 

She walked past and it was like slow motion, i stopped my music and said to myself, "damn who is that"?! and that slow motion shit stopped and time was regular again, i was like "aigh i have to get to know her". so i literally looked at the time to make sure that every tuesday/ thursday i was at that exact spot just so i could get a glimpse of her. and sure enough every tuesday/ thursday i saw what i thought would be my future wife. 

But the thing is, here i am picturing all this lovey dovey shit like walking down the beach, me surprising her with flowers, me taking picture of her (im a photographer) all that gushy shit, and i know deep down im too shy to even approach her lol... one thing about men that most of us wont admit is that, when we see "the one" or that girl that makes time stop and makes you reevaluate life for a second.... we be gettin scared... or shit maybe its just me. but the fear of fuckin up can really stop you from doing somethin great. in this instance it was my fear that got the best of me. but when we men see that girl that you just know you have to have, we just dont know how to act idk why.

but idk im speaking for all dudes like i know, shit so maybe its me. anyways... i would see this girl basically every tuesday/ thursday and never speak.. i would always chicken out, because it would be hella people in the hallways, then on top of that she always looked like she didnt wanna be bothered, so i was like fuck lol im never gon get this girl. 

so i said fuck it. ima just wait till i see her on the campus walking and try and speak to her then. i figured shit if i talk to her when its only her, if i get rejected, only me and her will know lol... so idk what picture i had in my head but the shit was nothing close to what actually happened. i thought i would see her on campus... and i literally saw her like 3 times on campus, and she was either to far for me to get to her or going in a building i wasnt going into... its like she was a ghost. i started questioning did i even see her in the first place, or was i just so in need of real love that i made her up...

So i basically just gave up... and then one day at work i saw her again. at this point it had been like weeks since i last saw her on campus. i had dropped the class i had in the spot where i saw her in the first place, so i basically didnt see her at all. 

if im being honest the shit was like a movie, i had got on the elevator to go check the trash in one of the buildings like i had did every single day of that semester, and as soon as i got off i saw her walking in one of the entrances. that same rush of adrenaline came over me like it was my first time seeing her all over again. we looked at each other but walked past one another. she walked to the staircase entrance and was gone in 5 seconds again.

i had never had a girl make my heart beat like this before. i was in a daze. i was so nervous but i now knew that she lived in one of the dorms i worked in, which made me happy. so i planned on talking to her the next day. my confidence level shot up, i was ready to finally talk to this girl. 

the next day at work i tried to spend as much time as i could in her dorm, and of course... i didnt see her. I saw her the one time and that was it. 

It wouldnt be until the end of the next semester which was spring 2017 that i saw her again. i was working in the dorms. she was packing her stuff up to leave, and i said oh well no use now. so i was with my coworker and we were laughing and joking, and i said alright man ima go and make myself busy. 

no sooner do i leave him to go check on trash in the dorm "my future wife" lived in, i was cleaning something in the lobby, and through the blinds i saw my coworker talking to the girl of my dreams!! she was smiling and laughing and i saw them get in the elevator together... so i rushed over to that building and of course the elevators we busy. so i took the stairs down and went to the basement and i didnt see them... i rushed to catch the elevator back up and as i was getting off the elevator i heard her laugh and say "have a good day" and the door shut, and my coworker walked around the corner and said "oh shits whats up"! from the time i saw them talking in the first place to me getting up there when she was walking out the door, it was about 2-3 minutes. 

my heart was beating 1000 times a minute, my coworker came around the corner and saw me, i said "yo bro, who was that girl you were just with"? he said oh her, idk... i was like bro that girl is the girl of my universe lol... the next time you see her give her my number or just text me so i can talk to her... he said alright bro i got you.

And of course because life is life, i didnt see her until spring 2018. J. cole's KOD album had just came out a few weeks prior and i was blasting it in my headphones. i was in dream girl's dorm, and i saw her again... she was loading up her car and getting ready to leave... today was the day. i was goin to speak to her... and i know i said this shit 5 thousand times, but this time i had a feeling it would be my last chance.

i saw her a few times loading her car and was nervous. so i turned on one of my favorite cole songs... 03 adolescence. it gave me the confidence i needed. i saw her walking with her R.A and i knew that meant she was checking out and leaving for good, so i waited in the lobby because i knew she would have to walk through there to get to her car...

i was nervous as fuck, and even more because she had her R.A with her and if i got rejected he would see, but i said fuck it. she walked in and i said excuse me, she turned to me and her smile was beautiful, her voice was soft and kind of high pitched. "i said im sorry to bother you but you are beautiful to me and i have had a crush on you for a long time"

she started blushing, smiling and giggling. she said "oh my god do u? where have you see me at?" I said "eh you know, just around". i knew time was fading for me to ask for her number, so i said hey listen i have to get back to work and i know you have to leave, so how about i give you my number and you just text me. she said ok cool.. she pulled out her iphone. the screen was cracked, so i was extra careful to type my number in correctly. i handed it back to her and she said "cool i'll text you when later"

i said ok. on the outside i looked hella regular, but on the inside i was on the moon somewere... i walked into one of the other dorms and jumped up with excitement, i couldnt believe after all this time we had finally spoke. i finally got to talk to her. i was on fire. but then i quickly came back down to earth because the real test was waiting to see would she hit me up. 

I waited all day and all night, and came up with every excuse in the book. "maybe she just got tired from driving" lol... maybe she dropped her phone and it cracked and broke... maybe she accidently deleted the number. i came up with every excuse in the book. 

and after all that, she never texted me. and i have to say my feelings were hurt for a few days. i was more embarrassed than anything, because i put myself out there only to strike out. it was also the fact that i pictured us walking down the beach, all that lovey dovey shit i had thought about was basically never gonna happen. i had feelings for this girl, and she didnt even know the half. what hurt the most was that she never got to know how i really felt. i pictured her asking me "so how long have you liked me"? and i wouldve told her how i knew i liked her from the first time i laid eyes on her

how i knew exactly what she wore on the first day i saw her, how furiously my heart beat from just getting a glimpse of her. i wouldve told her that every time i saw her it was like the first time i saw her.... but it never happened sadly... and after that encounter it was truly the last time i had saw her. she either transferred,  moved off campus, or graduated. so i wrote this out because your story reminded me of this, but also just to say, we're all kind of awkward in our own little way, and i think that no matter how awkward we are and how odd we might be, theres someone out there waiting in the universe that will love us unconditionally. ( sorry this was so long) have a great night.