#i am a sucker for two terrible people in love

[bardandbear]

Jumping on this train (and it really helped me think about backstory before release!)

Morgwynn Belaine - Warlock, Tiefling, Charlatan

She's the black sheep of the family - their entire purpose is to breed powerful spellcasters, but she had no magic beyond a few infernal cantrips. Flunking out of wizard school and then bard college led to her making a deal with a succubus to finally get access to the magic she so desperately needed, only to be kicked out for cheating and disowned. She's bitter, hedonistic and quietly desperate to prove she's worthy of something other than failure. Gale pokes sore points about her lack of magical talent, but she pokes back (the scene where she channels the weave with Gale is super important to her). She's this close to falling for him. But the moments where she and Astarion share genuine connection like two feral animals experiencing kindness for the first time eventually win out, especially after her patron gets involved (and doesn't trust Gale one bit). It's entirely by accident, and there's a chance they might actually recognise enough of the toxic parts they share to heal eachother, or alternatively wallow in them like it's a hot tub. They're going to make each other better, or so much worse. But they'll do it together.

Feed my BG3 hunger.

I wanna know for those playing with CustomTavs that will romance someone in the game, who are they wooing? And why? How do you imagine their dynamic? In tags or reblogs are fine! I'll start;

Delight- Warlock, Tiefling, Criminal

I literally cannot unsee her romancing Astarion.

Their pasts just line up and mirror so well, as do their current situations, and while she's not outright cruel she's definitely not a Good Guy. She finds him funny and over the top, and is entertained by his poor lying but drawn in by his vulnerability. He finds her contradictory but also funny (laughing together about the walking undead husband was a sweet moment between them lmao) and is starting to find her smartass comments and teasing endearing. They don't just become good lovers, they become good friends, and they will be wonderfully morally grey and chaotic together.

Briallen- Half-Orc, Sorceror, Folk Hero

This bitch can fit so much Survivor's Guilt inside her!! I think she will really fit well with Halsin all things considered. She is, down to her core, a genuinely good person who wants to protect and help, even if she sees her heroism as a selfish act to punish herself. I can see her being drawn to Halsin's strength, confidence and wisdom and I can see him drawn to her bravery, selflessness and serenity. But hopefully he will be able to curb her extremely low sense of self-preservation and she will show him that she will accept him in his entirety with no strings. Two folks who really admire each other slowly falling head over heels for each other!

Iker- Human, Ranger, Soldier

Gale. Not just because he's a magebreaker and I love the whole enemies/rivals to lovers, but because Gale is a wonderfully complicated person and turns out Iker finds complicated hot. I can see Gale intially finding his standoffish and straight up cunty behaviour annoying/vaguely amusing at first, but become increasingly curious about the person he used to be before everything. Iker looks at Gale and they think "Fuck. He's hot. Damn mage." and becomes fascinated with the fractured man beneath the perfect veneer. Idk about Gale, but Iker is actually the devoted type and in the future won't care what he does as long as he lets them stay by his side. Unhealthy obsessions all round let's get on it cunts.

Rowan- Half-Elf, Wizard, Scholar/Sage

I am truly a bit stumped with them BUT I can see them making poor decisions and falling for Wyll. He's got secrets and they're a curious sort who naturally wants to uncover them, for good or ill. They trigger Wyll's protective instinct, as they are particularly a bit naive about the wider world beyond their studies and dig sites and he's as soon to find them crouching down in the middle of a battle protecting a suspected artifact as he is to find them completely closed off to the world with her nose in a tome. He would find their completely objective opinion about his situation surprisingly refreshing and they want to study him under a microscope (oh and he has a very nice smile they can't seem to say no to). They'll make him better, he'll make them worse lol.

Zlatan- Githyanki, Cleric, Outlander

Oh Shadowheart for sure. Not only does he find her beautiful, he's intrigued with the fact that such a kind person (objectively) worships such an evil goddess. He's always been fascinated with outlier cultures and beliefs, like the drow. She would obviously be wary of him at first, but will be pleasantly surprised by his easygoing and cheerful nature yet shocked by his daredevilry and adventurousness. When she finally lets down her guard and they get closer, I can see them having actually quite a romantic dynamic between them.

Delshad [Name WIP]- Dragonborn, Fighter, Noble

I'll be honest, I was inspired by the Panel to make a hot af dragonborn to sweep Karlach off her feet. I'm weak. He is literally Just Some Guy. He's polite, he's softspoken, he likes embroidery and he will Fuck You Up when pressed. He would find Karlach very, very cute once she trusts him with her more romantic side and he can withstand her sparky tendencies with all his scales. She would appreciate the fact that he's pretty non-conforming in terms of his status and his gender stereotype and that he's only a gentleman with her FOR her. Very sweet, very soft relationship ahoy!!

Tav [Name Undecided]- Gnome/Deep Gnome, Rogue, Urchin or Charlatan?

Now this Tav is very much a recent and underdeveloped idea, because I saw The Prettiest gnome Tav the other day and I had this image of a cute gnome lady Absolutely Down Bad for Lae'zel because she loves big strong hot mean women. I imagine a very messy, horny dynamic since this Tav despises any authority on principle and Lae'zel comes from a society very much built upon obeying authority, but I can see Lae'zel finding Tav's dedication to chaos and getting things done her way or no way quite attractive.

[rebornofstars]

SEPFEMBER 2024 PROMPTS LIST

HERE WE ARE! AT LONG LAST! THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN (HOPEFULLY) WAITING FOR! GIRL MONTH!

I honestly can't believe this is actually happening. This event was a shower thought a few months ago.

Here's a recap of the event: to participate, make at least one fanwork of any variety during September that features a woman or women from the Zelda franchise as the main character/s. All Linksmeets are welcome in this challenge, as well as general LoZ fans!

Before I drop the prompts list for those who are looking for a little direction, I'd like to mention that I have made an AO3 COLLECTION FOR THIS EVENT. It's open and unmoderated so you can add your works to it freely. And if you post on tumblr, please tag #sepfember !! I'll be scrolling through the tag every day looking for things to reblog and gush about 👀

If you have any questions at all about this event, or you want to chat about it, my askbox is open! I will also respond to comments and reblogs of this post.

Now, onto the prompts. Disclaimer: you DON'T have to use all/any of these prompts, or only create things for certain characters on their featured day. This list is just a GUIDE for those who want it. If you have other plans, go with your heart!

At the end of the day, this is a celebration, and all that matters is that you have fun. I hope some of you will join me next month in giving our girls some time in the spotlight, but if you can't, that's okay! There's no pressure! This is just a passion project of mine, really, and I am overjoyed that people are interested 💛💛💛

(apologies in advance for the terrible quality of these pics and the equally terrible commentary. i thought it would be funny. also, i've never had to come up with a prompts list before and it shows.)

DAY 1: SKYWARD SWORD ZELDA + PURPOSE

(we start at the beginning of course 💛)

DAY 2: MARIN + WASH

(it was SO hard to find a screenshot of her that didn't have link in it. they're both cute but this ain't about him.)

DAY 3: MEDLI + GIFT

(i didn't know she played the harp until i saw this screenshot! i obviously have a lot to learn.)

DAY 4: TWILIGHT PRINCESS ZELDA + FREEZE

(how creepy does she look here?! so awesome)

DAY 5: HILDA + GHOST

(SUCH a good character for real. she has depth!!!! she has a thematic purpose!!!)

DAY 6: URBOSA + LOSE

(two words: LIGHTNING POWERS ⚡⚡⚡)

DAY 7: SPIRIT TRACKS ZELDA + MISTAKE

(babygirl you are 2 entire pixels.)

DAY 8: FI + ORDER

(oh she is everything to me)

DAY 9: MIDNA + SWORD

(she looks so soulful right now)

DAY 10: HYRULE WARRIORS ZELDA + SUMMON

(what a FIRE camera angle??? her armour is so impractically attached but SHE HAS A SWORD‼️)

DAY 11: GODDESSES OF HYRULE + EYES

(hylia, din, nayru, farore, the list goes on...)

DAY 12: ZORA PRINCESSES + TRUST

(mipha, ruto... poor suckers... it can't be fun, falling for link...)

DAY 13: OCARINA OF TIME ZELDA | SHEIK + FATE

(note: I personally hc this character as a trans man, but since this isn't explicitly confirmed in-game and might not be shared with everyone, I've given them a celebration day anyway. you are free to do what you wish.)

DAY 14: MALON + GUARD

(she is adorable. look at her)

DAY 15: IMPA + BOUND

(HOTTEST MOST SEXY MOST BADASS WOMAN IN THE FRANCHISE ‼️‼️‼️ I LOVE YOU IMPA YOU ARE PERFECT. SHUT UP I DEFINITELY DON'T PLAY FAVOURITES—)

DAY 16: FOUR SWORDS ADVENTURES ZELDA + PORTAL

(i loved her in the fsa manga. she's barely in it but STILL. go read it.)

DAY 17: FAIRIES + TIRED

(the great fairies, navi, ciela, tatl, proxi...)

DAY 18: TETRA + LEGACY

(isn't she KICKASS?!)

DAY 19: EPONA + BONE

(our lovely loyal girl 🥰)

DAY 20: A LINK BETWEEN WORLDS ZELDA + HOME

(SHE IS SUCH A GOOD PARALLEL TO HILDA PLEASSSSSE)

DAY 21: SARIA + WISH

(a classic character! isn't this picture so peaceful)

DAY 22: BOTW/AOC/TOTK ZELDA + PEACE

(SHE IS EVERYTHING TO ME. SCREAMING CLAWING CRYING. MY DARLING, YOUR FANARTISTS WERE THE ONES TO DRAW ME INTO THE ZELDA FANDOM. I HOPE I CAN RETURN THE FAVOUR ONE DAY)

DAY 23: CIA + LANA + STUDY

(technically, she's one person. between the two of them they certainly only wear enough clothes for one person... )

DAY 24: ARYLL + HUG

(sister to the hero! but what's her story?)

DAY 25: ECHOES OF WISDOM ZELDA + ARREST

(YEAHHHHHHHHH GIRL MONTH GIRL DAY GIRL GAME!!!)

DAY 26: CD-i ZELDA + HOLIDAY

(hehheehehehe. i bet you weren't expecting her. neither was i tbh)

DAY 27: PURAH + FIRE

(SHE'S CLEVER! I LOVE CLEVER WOMEN!)

DAY 28: ILIA + ERUNE + MEND

(listen. i know erune is a very niche character - she literally only exists in the four swords manga - but consider. i love her)

DAY 29: ALTTP/OOS/OOA/LA ZELDA + MISSING

(she has no canon personality. you know what that means. get the building equipment out fellas)

DAY 30: LINKLE + FAREWELL

(and here we are - LAST DAY!)

THE END! YAY! I CAN'T WAIT FOR SEPTEMBER - CAN YOU?

[samubytheocean]

imagine hot summer days

It’s so hot, you imagine if it’s what it is like to be buried. You wonder if people will be able to smell the love of his gaze on you at this moment. You pray that they will.

Fluff, little something based on my previous post cuz I am a sucker for summer

Hot summers. The ac is broken with a week until the AS comes, so it’s a lazy afternoon on your bed, wearing the skimpiest tank and shorts, laying down flat with the fan on the highest setting. You’ve got a glass of ice linked between your arms, switching every now and then to keep both sides cool. It’s a pretty desperate attempt to stay sane in this burning weather, especially when you’ve got this furnace of a boy laying flat next to you.

He looks loopy as well, sweaty hair sticking to his slightly red face. You guys are sharing a pillow, the biggest form of intimacy you’ll allow at the moment, and his breath fans around the humid room across to your face, smelling like soap and wooden gym floor. It’s comforting. He’s comforting. The white sound of the fan and the occasional airplane noise is almost to lure you to sleep- maybe you’re passing out. You wouldn’t mind, you’re in the safest hands- until you feel hot fingertips feather on your stomach. You open your eyes and glance at the handsome boy, who’s still looking up at the ceiling with heavy eyelids, but pretty face barely holding back the smile. You softly snap the hand away.

“It’s hot.” You whisper.

“You’re hot.” He whispers back. You roll your eyes affectionately. You can’t tell if it’s the heat or he is actually blushing. Ever so charming. You hate that it works every time. You’re blushing.

“I really am. So please stay on your side of the bed.”

“Like this?” He leans over to you, the body clearly not touching, but you can feel the warmth radiate from him. Despite his cheeky teasing, you feel content. Your eyes soften. You feel held, and it’s something about summer that you love. You already felt like he was touching you- everywhere, so warm and hot and drowsy but oh so passionate. Yeah summer. Young, stupid love. But he’s yours, and he looks at you, your entire face.

His love is observing you. And torturing you with terrible lines, but his gaze dips you into something people will only call youth. And love. You memorize his scent. You know it will be held part of your own musk, for longer than you’ll live. You think about being buried under a willow tree. You pray that other lovers- in a hot summer day just like this- will catch the scent of this moment and pass it on. It’s the kind of moments you’ll write poetry about, and pray that people will read on your grave. You hope to live, to be recognized just as this moment, all down to the molecules. Not because he owns you- but you’ll be named after his love, for only he truly knows the symbols you speak.

“Yeah. Like that.”

“Sleepy?”

“A little.”

“I’ll wake you up when it gets a little cooler.”

You know he won’t. His big built body is getting warmer just like how it gets when he gets sleepy. You know he isn’t going to set that alarm. But you wouldn’t mind jerking up at 11 pm all in sweat and fake complaining to him for letting you two to miss an entire day. You wouldn’t mind his sleepy, firm and gentle hands pull you back into the bed. It’s just a day. It’s just a very hot summer day.

And honestly? You wouldn’t even mind missing a sweet little eternity if it’s with your boy.

OSAMU, AKAASHI, SUGAWARA, TSUKISHIMA, KUROO, KITA, IWAIZUMI

SUGURU, CHOSO

JEAN, EREN

[1moreff-creator]

I remember you saying that Tsuno and Okazaki are your favorites from Tetro. How are you feeling, FF :3

Spoilers for TDRP CH3. CW: Murder, Okazaki.

I, for one, am feeling delighted on one hand and kinda sad on the other, as you can probably imagine! I can’t be too upset though, since I’m used to my favorites dying in general, but in Tetro especially. Sasaki was my favorite in CH1. Oka and Chiba competed for my favorite status in CH2. And now Oka and Tsuno were my favorites in CH3. I haven’t decided who is my favorite of the people still alive, but Hiroaki, Tamba and Yanagi are on thin ice (pun intended for Yanagi).

In particular, I’m not upset at all about Oka’s death. I think you put it best in some of your posts: she wasn’t gonna last forever, so I just wanted her to go out with a bang, and she went out with the equivalent of a nuclear blast. Her supervillain reveal is probably my favorite scene in all of Tetro, I can’t immediately think of any other that matches up to it in my books. Just completely unhinged behavior after what was probably my favorite trial so far, which is impressive given the whole “CH3 curse” canon dangan usually had.

She was just extremely entertaining, what can I say? Her insults, her taunts, her crazy beef with Tsuno, everyone’s reactions, all simply peak. And I know this might seem like a weird thing to focus on, but her background music is lovely. One of my main gripes with the Tetro format (and this is just personal preference, don’t take it as criticism because it isn’t) is the lack of bg music, so of course I’m glad my fave gets her own theme. Monarch shit.

And, come on. How often is it that both of your favorites have a storyline connection as peculiar as the whole “nemesis” thing these two had going on? Like, it’s genuinely awesome, and the fact that it’s completely one-sided just makes it better! I kinda wish we could have seen Tsuno’s reaction to this, because holy hell. How would you even react to this???

Oh, and the Watari thing. I’ve always been a sucker for terribly evil characters who have a soft spot for a nice person. Watari’s despair while Oka’s having the time of her life is genuinely awesome, and Oka clearly liking the time she spent with Watari is fun.

I do feel like I’m missing stuff, though? Like, I‘ve seen some analysis in Tumblr about Oka’s backstory which I assume is revealed in Staffside, because I have no idea what these people are talking about but it sounds cool. I really- I gotta read Staffside, I think, it’s getting critical by now.

Oh yeah, btw. Oka’s Yonekura’s kid! Since I haven’t read Staffside, that only tells me something about Dr Yonekura and not so much Oka. I will thank Oka for Dr Yonekura dropping one of my favorite lines in Tetro, though. “[Does your daughter have] Any special skills?” is crazy.

That said, I am slightly upset that Tsuno died when she did. I wanted to see her crash out after learning Oka beat up Wada! I would have loved to see her react to Oka’s made up beef with her! I wanted to see her crumble and burn out even more than she already was! I would have loved for her to outlive Wada just to see her reaction! I am a normal person with normal desires of seeing my favorites suffer horrendously!!! But oh well, fangans gonna fangan, I guess. Can’t be too torn up about it. At least Oka’s beef with her remains legendary.

I also feel like I should at least mention Kamimura? It’s funny ‘cuz like. He’s just There. He ain’t got nothing to do with the most toxic one-sided ship in history, he kinda just got caught in the crossfire. I feel like his death here makes sense, though; he had his arcs, he had his development and stuff, and now we get to see Hasegawa crash out for up to 3 chapters which is awesome! Assuming a standard DR formula, of course.

Anyways, thanks for the ask! I really should probably post more about Tetro, so this gives me an excuse lol :v

[blue-willow-tree]

hii so i know you’re not that active rn, but i hahr s question about a kink.

first n foremost i want you to know that you can absolutely not answer if this makes you uncomfortable! please don’t feel obligated to answer.

i‘m an anon of yours but this is kinda too personal for me to ask even on anon with my emoji, so i‘m asking completely anon.

you have an educational post about cnc, and i kinda have a question to that, or rather, a kink that falls under the category. i get the concept of cnc n stuff.

there‘s this r@pe play or kink. i get that it falls under cnc, consensual non consent. i just feel wierd about it. damn this is hard to explain/ask

so like — i was r-worded when i was younger and i kind of do enjoy the idea of r@pe play/kink but st the same time i feel wierd about it. cause - yk, it happened to me n it’s not fun but with someone i love, as part of cnc, it doesn’t sound so bad. like — i‘m a sucker for somno and intox play, like HELL YEAH i like that, but i‘m really conflicted about the r@pe play/kink thingy.

like — yeah on the one side it has appeal to just let go, but know you‘re safe with your partner but at the other side i think it’s wierd i think about it, or kind of like it.

god, does this make sense at all? i understand that cnc can be a way of trauma coping and that‘s probably why i find it somewhat appealing, but i just— i don‘t get why, you know?

damn this feels like total gibberish. i guess my overall question is, WHY can cnc/r@pe kink be a way of coping with trauma? or, am i wierd for kind of liking it, as a victim?

once again, i totally get it if you don’t wanna answer, if it’s too much or something.

have a nice day, mommy :3

Hi there angel x

First of all, thank you for trusting me to help you with this question. I promise to answer it to the best of my abilities, and I'll happily take a small break from my inactivity to answer this x

Well, the answer to this question can vary, but the most prominent reason as to why this is a way to cope with the trauma is because of the aspect of control. Even though the sub gets to feel as if they don't have control, and the freedom that comes with that feeling, they also get to have the safety of knowing that they are in control this time. Some people like to replay the scenario that happened to them, purely so that they can change it into a positive scenario by knowing that they have control this time and that they're safe. Others prefer taking other cnc approaches, but it's all about knowing that they get to feel the freedom of letting go but also knowing that this time it's different.

Trauma kinks come in all different forms, that's why in the bdsm community there is no shame. You can have limits and boundaries as long as you don't disrespect those that fit within your limits and boundaries. I am not an ageplayer, but I am friends with a few. I have plenty of fauxcest followers that are all really sweet and funny on their blogs. Cnc is a kink of my own and it also spawned from trauma, but it's apart of many peoples limits as well and it isn't for everyone. This community is a safe space and our mind wants to protect us by changing a negative past trauma into something we desire in a positive, healthy way between two consenting adults that are in full control of the situation. (Ageplay, fauxcest and cnc don't need to particularly stem from trauma but in many cases they do, that's why I used those examples x)

Something terrible happened to you, love, and I'm so incredibly sorry for that. Don't feel shame, rather allow yourself to embrace your desires in a healthy manner instead of tearing yourself alive because of the shame. Take control, stay safe, and only ever embrace this with somebody you are 100000000% comfortable with.

Come back anytime, angel, and remember that you're safe here x Would you feel comfortable with me linking this into my pinned as an educational post about cnc and trauma kinks?

[notmorbid]

twin peaks: season 1.

dialogue prompts from season one of twin peaks.

is this going to happen every damn time?

now means now.

i thought the only time you cared about was making time.

i'll see you in my dreams.

don't do anything i wouldn't do.

come on, cowboy, light your fire.

i thought i was your little pick-me-up.

quit worrying and start scurrying.

nice day for a picnic.

don't walk away from me like that.

you're not telling anybody anything.

buy you a coffee?

i've never seen so many trees in my life.

have any trouble finding the place?

the whole town's really badly shaken up.

what kind of fantastic trees have you got growing around here?

i told you i had a feeling we'd see ___ again.

you gonna let me in on whatever the hell is going on here?

don't tell me where i ought to be.

muffle it, junior.

i'm not your friend.

i sure know how to pick 'em, huh?

i don't need any damn sympathetic anything.

is there some law against having a picnic?

who are you protecting?

what kind of cigarettes do you smoke?

you're not drinking and driving, are you?

the best-laid plans of mice and men...

don't do it for me. do it for yourself.

there's liable to be a little trouble this evening.

you want me to follow at a discreet distance?

i changed my mind. i'm not sorry.

do your palms ever itch?

who would do a thing like that?

guess why i'm so happy today.

you woke us crying in your sleep last night.

if we tell the truth, we don't have to get our stories straight.

we got places to go and people to see.

i think now i understand how you feel about ____.

don't drink that coffee! you'd never guess: there was a fish in the percolator.

don't 'sweetheart' me, you old dog.

i respect your rebellious nature.

the quieter we become, the more we hear.

you think you got problems?

let's get the hell out of here.

i was up all night working on that invention.

you cannot come by here like this.

it's not the first time and it won't be the last, but i'm in that doghouse again.

god, i love this music.

i've seen some slipshod, backwater burgs, but this place takes the cake.

you don't know what you've done for me.

i told them you were on your world tour and they should contact your press agent.

get your boots off my bed and go to your room.

what is going on in this house?

i mean it like it is. as it sounds.

when i saw the face of god, i was changed.

let's rock.

where we're from, the birds sing a pretty song, and there's music in the air.

thank you for talking to me.

let me tell you about the dream i had last night.

do you know where dreams come from?

i've got compassion running out of my nose, pal.

stupidity is not a necessarily inherent trait.

i do not suffer fools gladly, and fools with badges, never.

the old rustic sucker punch, huh?

in ceremony begins understanding.

don't be afraid. we will all be there together.

sounds like you've been snacking on some of the local mushrooms.

what are you looking at? what are you waiting for?

you damn hypocrites make me sick.

save your prayers. ___ would have laughed at them, anyway.

this must be where pies go when they die.

there's something evil out there. something very, very strange in these old woods.

something horrible is going to happen.

they want to hurt me. i know it.

be a man about it. ask me to my face.

i'm a terrible person. i pretend that i'm not, but i am.

people think of me as their friend. the truth is, i really don't care.

nothing is going to happen to you. not now, not ever. not while i'm around.

do you believe in the soul?

you always said you could never tell us apart.

in real life there is no algebra.

maybe you should run away and join the circus.

i swear on my life, i have changed.

the shortest distance between two points is not necessarily a straight line.

not too many secrets left around here.

i've got one man too many in my life, and i'm married to him.

there isn't all the time in the world. i see that now.

to be perfectly honest, i'm tired and a little on edge.

i can't believe you were ever my age.

i have to put gas in my car like everyone else.

maybe that's our trouble. we never want to hurt anyone. we never just take what we want.

i got your note. are you alright?

you little fruit loop.

they move so slowly when they're not afraid.

i've got tea, i've got cookies. no cake.

shut your eyes and you'll burst into flames.

fire is the devil, hiding like a coward in the smoke.

you're not going to hurt me again.

what you need right now, more than anything else, is a friend.

secrets are dangerous things.

i don't appreciate your attitude.

i'm a little better at faces than names, i guess.

you think people really change?

every day, once a day, give yourself a present.

mother always said i was born lucky.

no names. you don't offer and you don't ask.

there used to be something caring between us.

i never should have taken you up to that house on the hill.

if somewhere under all that scar tissue there's the faintest flicker of what we used to feel for each other, i'm asking you to feel that now.

given what i've become and the way i've treated people, there's no one else i can turn to.

i can't blame you for dreaming.

i always talk too big. that's my biggest fault.

what kind of dangerous game have you been playing?

[fluffyfantasticducky]

The Sound of Love

☆ Pairing: Loki x Mutant!Reader

☆ Synopsis: Loki now an Avenger, is quite the reclusive and introverted member in the Avenger's compound and for someone who likes peace and quiet, it's ironic how smitten he is for the loudest member of the team.

☆ Word Count: 5,207

☆ Notes: Loki is smitten flirty ler. Reader is a mutant with hypersonic voice. This had been in my WIPs for so long, but I finally have some time off 😭 enjoy.

☆ Warnings: Anxious Reader, insecurities regarding voice and brief weight insecurities are mentioned. I am a sucker for opposites attract so the reader is a stereotypical sunshine happy go lucky.

Being an Avenger was interesting on its own, periods of strict dieting, rigorous training regimes, public events to raise public morale, testing out technology, political meetings, missions that lasted days or even weeks. Now, when you were, not only a former enemy, but the enemy, the original reason they came to exist… Well, it made it all more difficult to just do anything outside of the tower.

It made Loki concerningly reclusive. At first it seemed convenient, people were scared of him, so him wanting nothing to do with the outside seemed like a fair exchange, the facilities had everything needed to survive anyway. But it was only a matter of time until it became concerning.

So, Thor started doing his best to drag him along to his patrols and visits to town. Which helped getting less dirty looks from people rather when he tried going alone. But Loki always found a way to escape back to the compound and cut his visits to the town short.

But things changed the day he met you.

And Loki was not particularly one to fawn over mortals like his brother whose line of lovers could fill countries, not even over another god. While Loki had a fair string of lovers behind him, none ever really meant much to him or lasted much for that matter.

But you… you had something different. You were everything Loki found annoying. If there was a list to thing that got on Loki’s nerves, you may have as well checked every little box. You had a strict moral code and mawkish righteousness like the super soldiers, you had a strong temper and were very vocal about the things you did not stand for like his brother, you had a bubbly personality and enjoyed teasing and joking (almost flirting) around like Stark and the Falcon did and given your powers you tended to be quite loud. And somehow, despite all those things that could drive Loki mad, he was completely smitten. Which was probably the most infuriating trait you had.

Being placed together, Loki and you seemed to be like night and day at first instance. Loki noticed how you always seemed to be in a good mood and never denied anyone a nice chat, while you practically had to beg Loki to engage in conversation and even still, he’d seem rather bothered by being interrupted. You were always doing something to help around the quarters like doing extra dishes, cooking snacks for everyone, or wiping dusty furniture when you noticed something was dirty while Loki spent his free time with books are maybe an old movie when he felt like agreeing to enjoy human culture. And while you enjoyed reading as well, while Loki liked reading in silence you usually heard music earphones as you wagged your leg along the beat as you devoured books beside him.

“Hey nerds,” Sam stepped in the room. “We’re going dancing tonight, you two coming?”

“I’d rather—”

“Oh, which club?” you asked excitedly.

You had a way of peaking Loki’s interest when you spoke like that, your enthusiasm was terribly contagious, but he was too proud to do anything but pretend he was still focused on his book.

“Nat and Wanda wanted to take their men dancing.”

“Oh, so we’re staying home tonight?” you smiled.

“Do you think yourself capable of convincing Banner or Vision of socializing in a big club?”

“Hey, no judging. Besides, it’s more fun like that, we get to choose our own music.” You smiled brightly, you always seemed to have something nice to say about everyone. “Which conference hall are you gonna use?”

“2C, at 9 pm.” Sam grinned. “I take it we’ll see you there, mockingbird?”

“Yeah, should I wear something in particular?” you asked.

“Oh, how about that something se—”

“Sam, you finish that sentence and I’ll glue your upper arms to your chest.”

He wasn’t one to agree with the other Avengers, but that was something he wouldn’t mind seeing. And Wilson didn’t take it personal as he just laughed and left.

“Are you joining us, Loki?” you asked.

“I would rather stay here and finish my book” Loki smiled. “You go have fun though, darling.”

“Oh… b-but it won’t be as fun without you! Please, please, oh please!” you had your fingers tangled in a praying gesture and you were making the biggest pleading eyes he’d ever seen.

You were unfairly cute, but the power of persuasion you had over him was even scarier than the one from your mutation.

“Yes, of course” he sighed. “Thor would be upset if I keep passing up on your silly group bonding activities.”

You had tackled him in a couch in a bright hug as you thanked him over and over as your cheek squeezed his own, even pressing a sweet kiss against his cheek.

Between such affection and getting to see you dance all night was the most delightful way to spend the night he could think of. Next chance he’d even dance with you. Because he didn’t want to make the mistake of not dancing with you when you invited him ever again. Not that he minded watching you dance the night away.

And your singing, Norns, if you weren’t talking to anyone, you were always singing at least in a mumbly manner. Loki wondered how you could never go hoarse.

Every time you sung Loki’s heart fluttered. There was no right that your singing did the things it did to him. But he couldn’t help but swoon every time you did. And people were starting to notice. Karaoke nights were particularly interesting.

“The little mortal has a lovely voice, right?” Thor nudged him while you were on their improvised stage with Wanda, singing to Dance with Somebody.

“It’s good” Loki shrugged, trying to play it off.

“Yes, you seem to be enjoying it...” Clint said making a mocking dreamy face with along with an over dramatic sigh.

“Leave Rudolf alone,” Tony said.

Loki arched an eyebrow. Stark wasn’t the kind to be mediator when teasing took place, much less when he was tipsy like this.

“Being absolutely smitten over a human must be damaging enough to his pride.” He snickered.

Banner and Rogers just smiled amusedly, meaning Loki was not gonna get any back up from the more level-headed Avengers. Not that he expected it.

“You’re all delusional idiots.” Loki rolled his eyes.

But his attention was snatched back to the stage when you reached a high note. You had a good technique, your mouth opened wide with a smile as your voice reached a volume high enough that you broke Tony’s wineglass.

At this point, it was a normal occurrence. Everyone still remembered that they had to replace the old crystal dome on the recreational room with fortified polymer “soundproof” windows from that one karaoke night when they had you singing Dream On, the fact that no one left that night with permanent hearing damage was almost a miracle.

This time you didn’t seem to even notice the casualty of Tony’s glass, as you and Wanda kept jumping and dancing around as you sang happily with your friend. Loki could feel the heat creeping up on his cheeks as he saw how happy you danced around, and he could suppress the smile.

It was funny really, how much his mother would scold him growing up for being so impatient with Thor’s loud a boisterous nature just to end up falling for someone who was exactly that, maybe even worse. You had a lot of energy which was good because you always pushed yourself in training, but Loki never expected to be so drawn to someone like you. You shone like the sun itself, and being a frost giant like he was, it seemed almost dangerous to fall for you.

“Loki, Loki, Loki!” you jumped on the couch next to him, “Look, Loki!”

Ah, that was another thing, you had a tendency to say his name a lot. You were what Midgardians described as hyperactive, but his name was something you repeated a lot more than any word, and more than anyone else’s.

“A cardboard box?” he smiled. “What’s so exciting about that?”

“Oh, haha” you rolled your eyes, “My package arrived!”

You gave him a pleading look and he smiled. At this point it was almost a ritual, you got a delivery and you rushed to Loki for him to open it with a dagger he’d summon. Which had also started a game.

“What’s your guess, darling?” he smirked as his hand sizzled with his Seid.

“The silver twins daggers, I mean one of them, but you get it” you said firmly.

It was that simple, he had such a wide and vast collection of daggers that whenever you needed him to use them, you’d have to try to guess which one he’d summon.

Most of the time you’d lose give the odds were at least 50 to one, and it didn’t help that honoring his title, Loki would change his pick last second if you ever got it right. But today he was in a good mood, and soon he was wielding one of his silver daggers, it felt weird wielding the left dagger on his right hand, but your excitement to see you had got it right was worth it as you fell back to the couch with a “WOOO!”

“Oh, congratulations little canary” he clapped.

“You’re becoming predictable, Loki” you smiled.

“Oh, is that right?” he grinned as he reached to poke your side making you squeak.

“Would you rather admit that I’m getting to know you better?” you smiled.

“Loki don’t quit your dreams as an Avenger, you don’t have much future as a harlequin” he chuckled.

“Oh, I don’t know, I’ve made you laugh, and not everyone is as tough of an audience as you are.”

He just chuckled as he opened your package for you. It was two pairs of headphones.

“Another one?” he smiled. “Do you break them that often that you need to be in constant state of purchase? And what do you need the extra set for?”

“You say it as if I just compulsively and irresponsibly bought headphones!”

Loki arched an eyebrow and relished the fait blush on your cheeks.

“I re-sell the ones in good state” you mumbled.

“Right, whatever you say. That’s why you got two pairs.”

“No, uh... this one’s for you.” You smiled as you handed him a pair, “They have better Bluetooth range, the battery lasts longer, the headband is adjustable, and it blocks outside noise.”

When you handed him the pair, he got a better look at them. It was pitch black, and on the driver, it had a little golden sticker shaped like his helmet, he shifted it and the gold shone green. It was still weird how ever since Thor let his story be known people had become more accepting of him, especially people who knew that the Mad Titan was a monster had even come to support him, but the concept of merchandising his image for admirers to show their preference for him was still new to the former prince.

But the present was very pretty, almost as the little mortal gifting it.

“Thank you” he said a bit more softly than he intended.

“It’s no problem,” you tucked a string of hair behind your ear in a way that made his heart flutter.

“This will help me have a reason to not hear Thor’s drunk singing the next Barton drops by with beer.”

You let out a shy laugh.

“A-Ah… no, it’s for me actually” you said, “well, because of me, I mean.”

“You? What could I possibly need to avoid hearing you for?”

You shrugged.

“Thor mentioned a while back that you thought I was too loud.”

“He did?”

Oh… Oh that imprudent, bumbling, traitorous, airheaded, twisted oaf. That’s NOT what had happened. He remembered that conversation like it had been yesterday.

“Loki, there you are!” his brother had called him.

“Where else would I be?” Loki asked tiredly. “It’s too early.”

“Ah, I see the young mockingbird has kept you awake again” Thor said noticing the mug of coffee on his younger’s brother’s hands.

“We stayed up late talking, yes” Loki yawned. “Where she gets so much energy from is beyond me.”

Thor just laughed.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this brother, it’s a welcome change, for sure, but an odd one.”

“What do you mean?”

“The little Midgardian has you completely enamored” Thor grinned smoothly, “I didn’t think she’d even be your type.”

“She’s… certainly different from what I’m accustomed” Loki agreed. “I’d dare to say he’s more rambunctious than you are. But she’s honest and strong-willed, a combination I didn’t get to see much of.”

Loki could only roll his eyes at previous relationships, because of his status he’d be greeted with two approaches: either partners who feared his rank and power and would submit to his will for fear, or even worse, leeches that would use him as a steppingstone to get to power (or get close to Thor). After a while Loki just gave up and played along treating every lover like a casual affair and soon move on to the next thing.

You, for once had no interest on royalty besides movies, you absolutely adored helping Thor prepare for dates with Jane which mean there was no interest. And you had no reprieve on giving Loki a piece of your mind when you felt he deserved it.

He smiled.

“She stayed up singing until late…” Loki mumbled, mostly for himself.

“I think it’s great.” Thor encouraged him. “When are you asking our little singing bird out?”

Loki chuckled, it was amusing to see how much better Thor adapted to Midgard expressions and idioms.

“I don’t think that’s gonna happen, brother” Loki said with the hint of a sad smile. “You said it, we’re not exactly each other’s types.”

“It’s true you’re quite the somber one, brother.” Thor teased him. “And our little mortal canary is always loud and bright.”

“Thing I would not and do not tolerate from anyone else” Loki said looking at his uproarious brother. “But she would find me rather dull.”

He never said he found you annoying, quite the opposite. But he could only imagine what his brother had done. He’d seen it far too many times back on Asgard.

When Thor, Volstagg or Fandral wanted to flirt they’d have this ridiculous approach of sending another one of them to mess with the girl they wanted to impress, annoy her into flirting. All harmless fun and always careful not to actually disrespect the maiden in question but Loki still found it annoying and like Hogun preferred a calmer style for the first approach. At least it was funny to see their strategy blow up in their face and more than once get a slap in the face.

Thor must have gone to you and mentioned that Loki thought you were too loud to tease you on his behalf. Not keeping in mind that you were not Asgardian which meant you were not accustomed to their harsher approach, and much less that despite loving to sing you were profoundly conscious about your voice’s volume. Loki had always been very careful about pointing out when your power made you too loud. Gently placing a hand on your thigh to calm you down when you got overexcited and therefore loud.

And yet, despite all of Loki’s effort to make you feel comfortable around him, here you were, with a timid smile with the most thoughtful gift to push Loki away. Thor could officially be crowned as the worst wingman in history of all Nine Realms.

He sighed.

“Dear heart, I don’t think I need this” Loki said gently, “Not for the reason you think, at least.”

“I just thought you could use not hearing me blasting your eardrums when you’re reading” you joked, but the tone of awkwardness was palpable.

“I’d be willing to risk that if you’d believe me, I don’t truly mind hearing you sing” Loki chuckled.

“But my voice… And music taste…”

“Are both beautiful,” Loki interrupted you, “and no one has a wider range of music in the entire Compound. Which I recall someone scolding me for not expanding my horizons to human music.”

“Ah… well, yeah, but you can always get that from the others, oldies from Steve and Bucky, rock from Tony, pop and electronic from Pete, and when Quill and the Guardians you can hear 80’s—”

“Dear, you’re very optimistic I can actually stand anyone you mentioned” Loki laughed. “Not everyone has your luck.”

“And no one else here likes—”

“Aaah!” you shushed him covering his mouth, “We agreed to never talk about my sins. It’s our secret.”

The look you gave him was threatening but sharing a secret with you was exciting and heartwarming. More because it was the most harmless secret, but you still got embarrassed about it, which Loki found beyond endearing.

“Oh, really? I very clearly remember hearing you singing to the top of your lungs this very week to it.”

“Shhh” you whispered as you fought a giggle. “We don’t talk about that, only you get to know.”

“Good to know I’m so special” Loki chuckled.

“You were a happy mistake” you said squinting your eyes in joking manner. “But if anyone else finds out I’m strangling you.”

“What’s the expression you mortals have…?” Loki smirked, “Don’t threaten me with a good time?”

Your cheeks turned hot pink as you smacked his arm with a laugh.

“You’re pain in the ass” you laughed.

“Well, I certainly appreciate having some influence on your backside.”

You let out a screech as you began smacking his arm with a bright blush on your face. But as he should’ve expected your screech was loud and made Loki wince a bit.

“Ah… Sorry” you said as the mumble returned to your voice. “See? That’s what the headphones are good for.”

Loki scowled with a huff.

“Alright, that’s enough.”

Before you had time to ask Loki had thrown you over the ottoman and with his knees pinning you by the shoulders and his feet stuck under the ottoman so there was no force on earth moving you.

“Uhh… Lokes? W-What are you doing?” you asked nervously.

“Testing how loud you can really be.”

What do you— Pfft!”

Loki didn’t make you wait for an answer (or to finish your question, that is), and he began slowly dragging his fingers across your ribs in a maddeningly gentle manner. And it wasn’t like your thin t-shirt didn’t do much to protect you.

You clenched your jaw as a big grin appeared on your face.

“Pfft! L-Loki!” you snickered.

“Yes, little dove?” Loki asked innocently.

Loki kept gently dragging his fingers across your torso, slowly tracing his fingers up and down your sides and ribs, in circular motion across your armpits and spiraling onto the center of your tummy.

All you could do was smack his legs as you tried to free your arms and kicking your legs on the air and your cheeks puffed with your jaw clenched as you did all you could to not burst out laughing.

“L-Loho— Loki please!” you looked like you were about to burst. “I’m behe— I’m begging you. D-Don’t!”

Loki just chuckled.

“Darling, I have not even started the real fun” he grinned deviously, “and you already look like you’re gonna puncture your own lung. Just laugh already.”

“I cahahan’t” you whined between the strangled giggles. “It’ll huhurt yohohou!”

“Beautiful little bird,” Loki smiled, “it’d be impossible for you to hurt me.”

He noticed the pretty rosy blush on your cheeks, and he relished the way you got flustered at his teasing. Loki simply chuckled and squeezed your ribs, now poking your ribs, drilling his fingers between each rib. Growing up both as the God of Mischief and with Thor as his older brother, he had come to know first-hand what kind of tickles were better to make someone laugh to insanity.

And that you did.

Your face was already impossibly red in the face, and giggles were already slipping out, so the poking were just the last straw that made you finally crack up. And you burst into loud laughter and crazy squirming, kicking your legs against the ottoman, arching your back and tugging against Loki’s hold as he tickled you to tears.

“LOKI! HAHAHAHA! W-WAIT! WAHAHAHAIT!” you screeched.

Loki winced a bit at your superhuman volume as a smile formed on his face from both pride from making you laugh and the endearment of your laugh on its own. Your pretty laugh only being further motivation to tickle you more.

But he decided ease off the tickling as he just stopped poking your ribs to gently scribble your ribs in light feather like touches. But by now your defenses were shattered to pieces and you kept giggling in soft wheezing giggles. He simply wiggled two fingers on each side as if he was striking chords of his old lyre.

“Oh gohohohod! How is thahahat so bad?!” you giggled in between hiccups and soft wheezes.

“I don’t think it’s that bad, you’re just that ticklish” he chuckled softly. “Look at you, you’re wheezing.”

“Hehehe! I’m not!” you hiccup. “Lohoki!”

The way you laughed out his name made Loki’s heart flutter in his chest. Your voice got high-pitched and wheezy in a way that was awfully adorable and it urged him to give you the biggest hug and cover your face in kisses and beg you to be his own.

“Loki! I'm gonna gehehet you back for this!” you screamed in a fit of laughter. “Stohohop it!”

Loki grinned without relenting just a bit, simply leaning into your ear.

“Oh, is that so? What makes you think you can get me, little dove?” he chuckles as he gently traced his fingers over your sides. “And do you assume you can get now, or at some later point when you are not trapped and helpless under me? Because all things considered...that sounds like an empty threat… my dear.”

The self-satisfaction in his tone was infuriating.

“You’re all mine to toy around with right now, little robin…” he said in an almost flirtatious tone.

“N-No! Loki! Don’t you dare!” you squeaked out.

He looked you in your eyes with a devious sparkle in his eyes, those same eyes Loki did whenever he got you involved in a prank that would most likely get both of you in trouble, and he smiled.

“I think, my darling…” he whispered softly, in a way he knew his breath would tingle against your skin. “I very much dare.”

And with that his gentle and nimble fingers reached your stomach, giving it a lot of gentle pokes and scribbling all over the skin poorly covered by your thin shirt with his blunt nails.

He knew that among the long list of insecurities you had, your stomach was high up there, and so he knew certain touches would make you uncomfortable, so he kept his eye on your face, paying extra reactions to see if any touch made you upset. But you seemed more focused on the sensation he inflicted on your sensitive skin, and your expressions didn’t reflect any sign of distress.

“Lohohohoki! Stohohop that!” you giggled.

“Aw… is it too much for you?” he grinned cheekily. “You’re quite the delight to torment though, and I wonder… just how would you manage this sort of attention… on the other areas you were ticklish upon.”

As he spoke he lower his hand to drag his fingers over your waistline from side to side in a maddeningly slow manner. The look of shock on your face was priceless.

“LOKI!” you cried.

“Oh my, my, little sparrow, are you ticklish here too?” he chuckled in an almost innocent tone as his finger slipped past your shirt as his nail scraped lightly over the ticklish spot.

But he did slow down, not enough to make it all stop, but enough to make you go back to soft laughs.

“Hm…” Loki looked at you, pretending to be in deep contemplation. “If I didn’t know you any better, I would dare to assume you are enjoying yourself.”

Loki had seen others in the compound tickle you before, he had tickled you before, and it was noticeable enough that you didn’t seem to mind the playful attention, given you hardly fought back or protested when.

You let out an outraged before a squeeze to your hipbones made you burst into giggles after a clearly involuntary snort that made Loki laugh.

“Oh, no witty back talking?” Loki chuckled.

 “Ihihihi! I’m gohohonna kill you!” you threatened him.

“Will you now?” Loki arched an eyebrow. “And how do you intend to do so?”

Rather than having a verbal response, he felt ticklish squeezing over his thighs and above his knees that made him jolt and bark out a laugh. It was enough distraction to make him stop for a moment, and he saw that little triumphant glint in your gaze.

“That was very very bold of you to make an attack like that...” he congratulated you, his tone menacingly impish. “But so far I had been gentle.”

And with that he shot his fingers onto the exposed hollow of your armpits. You immediately lose it when his fingers reach and tickle your underarms, immediately exploding into loud laughter once more.

“NOHOHOHO! NONONONO! LOKI, LOKI PLEASE! NOHOHOHOT THERE!” you squealed. “NAHAHAHAHA! HEHEHAHAHA! PLEEEEHAHAHAHAAHAHA!”

Your voice turned loud, and the walls literally shook around the two of you. But Loki was unscathed, perhaps a bit stunned by the strength of your voice, but he didn’t relent on the tickling.

“Well, that’s cute… but just for your information…” he smirked in a way that, had you been able to see through your tears of laughter would’ve made you weak in the knees. “I am not afraid of your ticklish little fingers.”

He chuckled again, as his fingers wiggling more sporadically, almost vibrating against your skin. You let out a blood curdling scream before your laughter turns silent, your face is red like a tomato and tears just kept streaming nonstop down your face as your body was shaking like a malfunctioning machine, your entire body language making evident that you need a break.

Perhaps that was a good sign that he had to stop. So, he did.

He raised his knees so you could slip your arms from under his legs, and you immediately pressed them against your chest, laughing silently prey of a giggle fit in a state of euphoria.

“Did I just...go too far?” he asked with a sheepish smile. “...I think...I may have gone too far, I apologize if… if I... I— hmpf!”

Before Loki could register what had happened, you had cupped his face and your lips were against his.

It wasn’t exactly the way Loki had pictured kissing you, and by all the Nine Realms had thought about it quite in detail. But this was… quite different from what he had fantasized. Your faces were upside down one from another, and it had happened so fast that you had just got Loki’s bottom lip at first impact, and he had been caught completely off guard.

But oh Gods… this topped every scenario he could’ve mused. Your lips were soft and smooth, and the taste of you… Norns, it was intoxicating, and it made him feel light-hearted, instinctively making close his eyes as melted into the kiss, leaning over to get a better taste of this paradise he had just encountered. He mimicked you as one of his hands reached to cup your cheek and caress it with his thumb.

Who knows how long you were like this, but it was certainly not enough.

But when you broke the kiss the look in your eyes was of shock and terror as you cupped your hands over your mouth.  Again, not what he would’ve expected. He had not got any complaints in his past about his skills, so he was certain he was not a sloppy kisser to be the sole cause of that expression.

“I— no... I didn’t… I uh… I’m sorry…” you mumbled. “I— I wasn’t, oh no…”

“What are you apologizing for?” Loki asked, as he felt anxiety starting to bubble on the pit of his stomach.

“I— I’m sorry… I don’t know what came over me…”  you stuttered and stumbled over your words, “I w-wasn’t thinking… I just… I felt giddy and… No… no, no... I’m sorry…”

Loki felt his brain throbbing inside his skull as you kept sputtering apologizes. A million thoughts rushing over his mind every fraction of a second. Did the kiss meant you liked him? But if you liked him what were you apologizing for? Or did you like him but not enough? Were you aware of all the feelings you stirred in him? Was this a cruel joke?

Before he realized what his body was doing, he had already smashed his mouth onto yours once more.

He wasn’t sure why he did that. Maybe desire. Perhaps just the panic of thinking that could’ve been the last time he tasted something quite as ineffable as you ever again and he refused to give it up so soon. Or he could simply have gone mad. Whatever the reason, he just prayed you didn’t hate him after this.

But to his surprise, you kissed him back, and he felt once again that peculiar wave of peace and simultaneous thrill running through his veins. Now pleasantly complemented by your fingers running through his hair, making him turn into putty in your hands. This time the kiss lasted much longer than the first.

Not that it left Loki quite satisfied… yet.

“S-So… Do I take this as a good sign that you maybe, sort of, kinda like me too?” you asked timidly.

Loki could help but laugh at that.

“I will dare to say so” he rolled his eyes, unable to hide the smile on his face.

“And that we could do that thing again… t-the kissing?”

Norns, his heart was gonna beat out of his chest.

“I would like that” he smiled.

You pressed your lips against his and that rush of excitement ran through him once again. Loki felt your lips buzzing as he heard the muffled laughs through the kiss, it made him laugh as well.

“What’s so funny?” he chuckled.

“Nothing” you giggled, “I just feel your smile.”

“What?”

“Yeah, I feel your smile curled up in a smile.” You explained. “It feels… nice.”

His cheeks lit up and he just shook his head with a smile before diving in for another kiss.

You were right, you could feel the other’s smile when you kissed. How did Loki never notice a detail as simple as that? It felt so lovely. Even more with the little hum-like muffled laughs bubbling from your throat as you kissed. Hearing your happy nervous laughs through the kiss was the loveliest sound he had ever heard.

| Masterpost |

[the-girl-in-the-high-castle]

I finished From S3 last night and wtf?

Every revelation simply happens. There is no foreshadowing, at least not a proper one. Nothing happens the whole season, and then, in the end, Fatima magically knows the truth about the sacrifices, even though we don't know how.

Tabitha and Jade just remember out of nowhere (I'm sorry, but it looked so cringe). The only good thing about it is Jim's confused ass.

Ethan simply starts talking about storywalkers, as if it's nothing strange and as if they have discussed it a thousand times before. Plus, that storywalker thing came out of nowhere too.

Every single character was useless as fuck the whole season. I won't even mention the things that were just forgotten for convenience.

I really, really wanted to ship Jade and Tabitha, and the reason for it was the storyline I thought they would have before I started watching. People were trying to make me watch the show for years, but I didn't, until the moment I heard about it having the reincarnation/past lives/destined meetings story in it. Because I am a sucker for those. If you have that in a story, I am all yours. It doesn't have to be a love story either. Except, this was handled terribly.

You expect me to buy the reincarnated lovers shit when you have the characters have like two scenes together. They don't even talk to each other until the end of S2/beginning of S3. For two seasons, Jade's had a more heartfelt conversation with Julie than he did with Tabitha. It all looks like the showrunners had no idea they were going to go there. You can't just tell people they are reincarnated lovers destined to keep meeting until they fix a mistake and then give us some half-baked plot twist when nothing that happened before was pointing to that. A plot twist is useless if you don't see the sense behind it.

I can't help but mention my canceled boat show, because if you want to see how it looks when you have two characters, seemingly strangers, make everyone believe they are the real thing even though the story doesn't say it. It shows it. Even if I never get the answers, I will forever believe Eyk is Maura's real husband. Sure, the show said "Look this other guy is her husband", but you don't believe in that because the characters' actions are showing something completely different. Or that Clémence and Jerome are the real thing, or other characters that form the connection on the ship. The story shows you that. But From S3 didn't show shit.

P.S

I really love Eion Bailey (since he was my beloved August/Pinocchio), and I'm really sorry he isn't playing a more likable character. Plus, I don't get the hate he gets. Sure, he's annoying, but I don't think he deserves hate more than most others.

[holdmytesseract]

The Price of Love

☆ The Baby Fever AU ☆

Loki x Y/N

Summary: You convince Loki to take you with him on a charity event, together with some other Avengers. What starts as a nice and exciting little trip to Canada, ends in a nightmare...

Warnings: pregnancy things/symptomps, overprotective Loki, almost nudity? thirst, suggestive smut?, swear words, Loki being the best hubby and dad possible, angst - quite a lot of angst, guns, bad people, violence, fighting, injury, blood, Loki going FERAL and being a bit... brutal, death, fluff

Word Count: 7,9k

a/n: Here it is, guys! The (almost) 8k words Baby Fever rollercoaster ride. 🫡 Yep... I went absolute bananas with this one. 😂 I love every bit, though. 😁 The story behind this fic? Well... @iamlokisgloriouspurpose made a post about a story she was looking for (some of you might remember) a few weeks ago. It was something about Loki x pregnant!reader, where she accidentally gets hit or something and Loki is overprotective, etc. She couldn't find the fic and I was like: Hey, would you want me to write something along that? And @iamlokisgloriouspurpose was like: Heck yeah! Well, here we are. You know how much of a sucker I am for such things... I couldn't resist. 🤷🏼‍♀️👀 Anyways... I hope y'all like it! 😁

Baby Fever Crew: Tagging y'all again in the comments! 😊💚

Baby Fever Masterlist °☆• Masterlist

"No, love, absolutely not," Loki stated; shaking his head and crossing his arms over his chest. "I won't allow that. Not in your condition. You rather stay here with Ella."

You raised an eyebrow, and put your hands on your hips. "In my condition? Babe, I'm pregnant! That's not a condition. I thought you knew that?" Loki snorted. "Well, to me it is." You sighed. "Okay, look, I understand your worry - but geez... Ease up a bit. I didn't even pass the first trimester. And besides, this is just a charity event. Not in the slightest dangerous." Your husband's jaw clenched, as his brain searched for the right words.

"I know, Y/N. I am more than aware of that, but..." He paused; unlocking his arms to tenderly cup your tiny, almost still invisible baby bump. "We fought so long for this, darling. Against heartbreak, sadness - Norns, even depression, and now that we are finally blessed with this little wonder growing in there, I'm not letting it go again. It was so hard for us to get pregnant. I'm not going to risk it."

You swallowed; raised your hands to cup both his cheeks. "I know, babe, I know..." You whispered; on the verge of giving in - but then you remembered a very important thing. "But you'll be there, too. You can always have an eye on me and protect us. I promise, that I'll never leave your side. And that I'll be careful. Plus, you wouldn't need to worry about our princess as well, 'cause she's more than safe with her grandparents on Asgard. She's already so excited to go there."

You could practically see the gears turning in his head. "How does that sound? What do you say?" A low grumble of disliking rumbled through Loki's chest, but in the end, he gave in with a sigh. A decision he was going to regret later. "Alright, fine."

Only a few days later, you and Loki were on your way to Canada - Calgary, to be precisely; together with Bruce, Peter and Tony. It wasn't a very big charity event, but an important one nevertheless.

Once the Quinjet landed, Tony immediately made sure to get everyone to the hotel you were staying in. After checking everyone in, the billionaire was quick to get to his room. "Alright, team... We'll meet at exactly eight p.m. tonight. No minute later. We have to be on time." He pointed at everyone - the longest at you and Loki. "Especially you two lovebirds. Understood?" Everybody nodded well-behaved. "Sure thing, Mr. Stark." Except Loki. The god just rolled his eyes. Tony ignored him and instead turned on his heels to leave the lobby. "Now if you'd excuse me... I've got a terrible headache, caused by all the sweet talk coming from Laufeyson's mouth. Ta-ta." From the corner of your eyes, you could see Bruce shaking his head. "He's such a diva sometimes." "Sometimes?" Asked Loki in return, causing you - and even Peter to giggle.

Loki stopped mid-sentence, to ask you this question in an almost offended voice, once he had turned to face you. You put the t-shirt in your hands down and looked at him confused; blinking. "Umm... Unpacking our stuff?" He immediately shook his head and walked over to you. "No, you're not." Loki said in a firm tone, taking the suitcase away. "You are going to lay down and rest. We can unpack later or even tomorrow. The flight was very stressful and exhausting - and the next few days are going to be packed and eventful as well. I don't want you to overdo it." "But, babe, I-" "No." He shushed you, placing both hands on your hips. "No excuses. You promised me, remember?" You sighed, knowing that he was right. You did promise him. "Alright, alright, fine. I'll go, lay down."

Loki took your hand and guided you to the hotel room you shared - and it was absolutely beautiful. Modern, luxurious, cosy - perfect for a few days. Tony had planned to take everyone to a few fan events and Comic Con's around Calgary after the charity event. Something you were definitely looking forward to.

"Tony definitely has a nice taste in hotels... Can't deny that. Don't you think, babe?" You looked over at Loki, who had just pulled the t-shirt he wore over his head. "It's more than likely the only thing Stark has a good taste in." You couldn't help yourself but to laugh. That laugh quickly died in your throat, though, when Loki slipped the jeans – which covered his lower body, over his hips and down his thighs; leaving him only in his black underwear - and socks. You bit your lip; tried not to stare or give into your raging pregnancy hormones. It was difficult. So, you decided to stop watching your husband strip and rather start unpacking your luggage. "I'm going to take a shower now, love. It was way too hot in the Quinjet. Stark always pretends he doesn't know that I am half a Frost Giant… And after that, I'm taking you out for dinner. You have to- What are you doing?"

Loki smiled and placed a tender kiss on your forehead. "Thank you." You wrapped both your arms around his torso, in order to hug him. But then another idea crossed your mind, and you let your hands wander down to the waistband of his briefs. "I could join you in the shower, you know..." A dark chuckle rumbled through his chest. You really thought you had him for a minute, "As tempting as this sounds, my queen..." but then he stepped out of your embrace. "But no. Not now. Not today. Please rest. It'll be good for you and the baby." Once again you sighed. It couldn't be helped. Loki stood his ground. "Okay, okay, I give up." Loki smiled and pressed a quick kiss on your lips, "Good girl." before he left for the bathroom.

Later that day, after having eaten dinner, you and Loki got ready for the charity event. While your husband got dressed, you decided to pay the shower a visit as well - for which you took your time. Getting ready for such a big event wasn't just done in a few minutes. Funnily, you had absolutely no idea what Loki was going to wear, so you chose to wear a black, elegant dress, which wasn't too sexy and overdressed, but also not completely innocent. It reached to your ankles and had a slit on the left side of your leg; stopping at your thighs. It was also tight around your waist, but not too tight - since you decided to not show the world (and teammates) yet that you were pregnant again. Okay, admittedly it could be easily mistaken by weight gaining, but you didn't want to risk the rumours to spread. After fixing your hair and applying some decent makeup, you were ready to go. You hoped Loki was ready as well, because a look on your phone told you, that it was almost time - and you didn't want to face Tony's diva wrath.

"Babe, are you rea-" Your words died in your throat, when you closed the bathroom door behind yourself; eyes landing on the god. He sat on the big, king-sized hotel bed; legs spread wide and phone in hands - which wasn't an unusual thing. It was the outfit he chose to wear, that took your breath away...

A black shirt, which hugged his arms and torso snugly; causing his biceps to bulge. The sleeves were rolled up, leaving his forearms deliciously bare. He had left the first few buttons of the shirt undone, exposing his chest in an almost sluttish way. With that not enough... Black, tight suit trousers covered his muscular thighs and legs; held together by an equally black leather belt. All this was paired with shiny, black dress shoes.

"Sweet Lord have mercy... Have you planned to get me pregnant all over again, looking like that, or... Perhaps to kill me?" Loki just chuckled, shaking his head, "Absolutely not, my queen." and stood up, "As much as I'd love to do that, though..."  straightening his shirt. "I can't, because I already did." He practically growled; winking at you. "I just wanted to give you something to look at. Besides, it's for charity - and you should look adequate on such a big event, right?" You were speechless. Entranced by his look and the words leaving his mouth.

And if this wouldn't have been erotic enough, he overcame it...

Those wild raven locks of his, were bound together, styled into a high manbun, with only a few loose curls being loose; neatly tucked behind his ears. On his fingers twinkled beside his wedding band a few other rings in black and emerald green; completing his outfit. Loki looked drop dead sexy. You could've jumped him. Right then and there - and he knew. Oh, he knew. The mischievous smile and cheeky look he was giving you said it all.

"You are a naughty, cheeky little shit sometimes, do you know that?" Your husband just chuckled once again and stepped over to you, in order to place his big hands on your waist. "I am aware of that, yes - and I know how much you love it." You smiled; trailing your fingertips over his exposed chest. "Hell yes, I do." He smirked mischievously and leaned down to kiss you passionately.

His oceanic blue eyes roamed over your body then; wetting his lips. "You look absolutely stunning as well, my love. Beautiful as ever. I especially appreciate..." His hand found the slit in your dress; cool palm gliding over the hot skin of your thigh. "...this little feature." You giggled like a schoolgirl - high on love and pregnancy hormones. "Thanks, Lokes - but I don't look quite as sexy as you do. You are going to break so many hearts tonight, babe." Loki shook his head. "That may be true, love, but I'd never break yours. Never." "I know."

About twenty minutes later, the whole team - including Pepper, who joined the party a bit later, 'cause she had a meeting this morning - arrived at the charity event, where already a lot of fans and paparazzi waited... At the red carpet. "Are you ready, my love?" Loki asked; taking your hand into his and helping you out of the limousine Tony had rented. "More than ready."

Together, with the other Avengers you set foot on the red carpet; cameras flashing around you like lightning. Loki kept on holding your hand tightly, not letting you go. He still wasn't convinced of your idea in joining all this - him. You noticed it; felt it. Recognized it in the way he acted around you. "Loki! Loki! Loki!" From everywhere around you, fans (mostly girls, of course) and paparazzi screamed his name; literally praising him like the god he was. But Loki only had eyes for you. He didn't give the people that much attention; his number one priority being you - his pregnant wife and mother of his little princess.

Nevertheless, he couldn't help himself but to throw one of his smouldering looks at the crowd, causing several women to faint - you were sure of it. After that, he redirected his attention back to you. "Everything alright, my love?" You nodded, squeezing his hand. "Of course. We're good." Loki gave you a smile, then turned to lean closer to your ear. "Stay close to me, please. I know this is just a charity event. And I am also very aware that you can defend yourself, but I told you once and I'm telling you again... I don't want to risk anything. I hope you understand." There was so much love, adoration and worry in his eyes; it almost caused your legs to give in.

Once more you nodded. "I promise. I promised you already." He smiled the softest of smiles and lifted your hand to his lips, earning a lot of coos and 'Aww's' from the hundreds of people at the display of affection. "Thank you. Somehow, I have a very bad feeling about all this. I don't know why, but... It's present." And Loki was proven right with his gut feeling. He watched you like a hawk during the whole evening, but he couldn't prevent it from happening...

The god was talking together with Bruce to a few of the important people who organized this event, when you were approaching the group of men, after getting yourself something to drink with Pepper. "Apologies to interrupt, but… Babe, do you have a second?" Loki immediately turned to face you, "Sure, darling." and placed a hand on the small of your back. "Please excuse me for a moment, gentlemen, but my lady is in need of me." He gave the men one of his charming gentlemen-like smiles and guided you a bit off sides from all the people.

"What's the matter, my love? Are you alright?" "Actually, I feel a bit woozy and..." You grimaced and placed both your hands on your lower abdomen; Loki's hands following suit. "Uh... Nauseous." Your husband frowned. Sure, this wasn't uncommon and it happened when you were pregnant with Ella as well, but that didn't stop him from being worried and protective. "Do you wish to leave?" "No. It's not that bad. I think I'm just going to pay the bathroom a visit; freshen up a bit and take a breath." Loki nodded, "Alright. I'll accompany you." and was more than ready to walk ahead, when you stopped him. "I think I can do that alone. It's just a visit to the bathroom. I won't be gone for long." The god bit his lip; clearly not convinced by your suggestion. "I don't know, I-" "Hey..." You gently grabbed both his hands squeezing them. "I'll be just fine. I don't want to drag you all across the building just for this. Besides, it's the ladies bathroom and you're a man, so..." Loki sighed, but once again, gave in. "Fine. Be careful, yes? And if it gets worse, we'll leave immediately." "Yes, Sir," you promised and pressed a quick kiss on his lips, before you let go of his hands and left for the bathroom.

Both, Loki's and Bruce's eyes widened immediately. They exchanged one look - and started to run, into the direction from where the woman came from. It led both men into the big, fancy stairwell of the building. Scanning the area, they searched for the said men - and found them quickly. They had barged through the doors on the bottom floor and were now standing in the entrance area, looking up. The Hydra logo shone bright on their black battle suits. "Hydra," stated Bruce, recognising the danger as well. "Stark, get your billionaire ass over here. We have a problem." Loki spoke through his little communication device. Not a second later, Tony flew over their heads, dressed in his suit, of course. "Already on it, Reindeer Games." "We have to get all the people out of here." The god nodded; green seidr washing over his body and changing his suit into his armour. "You do that, Banner. I'll go find Y/N." "No. She'll be alright, Loki. She can look after herself. I firstly need your help. I can't get all those innocent people out of here alone. Tony can distract those guys, but not for long."

That was the last time he had seen you for quite a while. At first, Loki was all cool with it, giving you the time to freshen up and calm your pregnancy symptoms - but after fifteen minutes, he got suspicious and an uneasy feeling started to grow within his stomach. So, he started to look around for you; asking his colleagues on the way, if they had seen you. Unfortunately, they didn't...

"Banner... Have you seen Y/N?" The doctor shook his head. "No, sorry. I haven't seen her in a while to be hon-" Bruce's words got interrupted by a loud noise - causing everyone inside the big hall to freeze. "What was that?" Loki's question didn't need to be answered by Bruce. A woman in black high heels and a sparkling pink dress literally ran inside the hall, screaming. "Guns! Gun! There are men with guns!"

Loki didn't like this. Not at all, but he knew that Bruce was right. If he wouldn't help him, a lot of innocent people would get more than likely hurt or killed. "Fine. Let's go." Bruce nodded and started to run off; Loki following him. "There's an emergency stairway, right down that hall. We'll get them out there."

That's what the two Avengers did then. Evacuating all the people. Loki was unable to stay focused, though. His thoughts were constantly travelling to you. He had a bad feeling about this from the beginning - and he had been right. He just hoped that you were alright...

After emptying your stomach one last time, you walked on slightly wobbly feet out of the cabin and to the sink. Looking in the mirror, you noticed that you were quite a bit pale. Well, no wonder. After throwing up that much... Once more you sighed and turned on the tap to splash yourself with some cold water and to rinse out your mouth to get rid of the foul taste. Then you took some more deep breaths and when you felt slightly better, you decided to find your husband and leave. So, you stepped over to the door and opened it - only to walk into an absolute chaos. It was loud. Gunshots sounded from everywhere. Rubble was laying around; the insides of the building was quite a bit damaged. Then you saw Tony in his suit flying around and shooting at something. You blinked. Whatever it was what happened and what was going on... How could you not notice?! Still in some kind of shock, you walked to the still intact railing of the open hallway, in order to find out what the fuck was happening. A mistake. A wrong decision. A decision your still woozy and foggy brain didn't think through. With horror in your eyes, you witnessed the literal army of what seemed to be Hydra men fighting against Tony and Pepper. Help..., you thought. They needed help. You were about to switch into your fighting mode, when you suddenly heard Loki's voice from far away. "Y/N! Watch out!" The warning came too late. Before you could even make out the sniper from across you, the bullet had hit you already. The force of it threw you to the ground. The last thing you heard before everything got dark, was the heart wrenching scream, which left your husband's lips.

While Loki, Bruce, Tony and even Pepper fought the army of Hydra supporter, you were still in the ladies bathroom; not having a clue what was going on. Yes, you had heard a loud noise, but were too occupied with not missing the toilet bowl while throwing up. On the way to the bathroom, your condition had suddenly switched very fast from 'not that bad' to 'I'm going to throw up any minute now'.

Well, that's where you were now... Hanging over the toilet; literally puking your guts out - all the while trying to not ruin your dress and hair. "Oh gods..." You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. You felt awful. Perhaps it was for the best to accept Loki's offer and return to the hotel. But... What to tell the others? The only people who knew of your second pregnancy were Loki, Ella and Natasha. Nobody else. After all, you told your best friend to not tell it a single soul - and you knew you could trust her, so... Bruce wouldn't know. Just like Tony and Pepper. And you had no intention in telling them. At least not now. You wanted to wait until you passed the 'critical' first trimester. Although, the little Frost Giant inside you was growing fast and soon you wouldn't be able to hide it for much longer anyway. Ugh, you thought. Decisions, decisions...

Loki was powerless. He couldn't do anything about it; was too far away from the sniper to stop him. With wide, teary eyes, he saw your body hitting the ground. For a moment, time seemed to stand still for him. He didn't even notice how he screamed. But then the harsh realisation hit him, and he started to run, getting as fast as somehow possible to you.

His heart was beating fast against his ribcage when he saw your limp, seemingly lifeless body - and the tears started to fall rapidly. "No, no, no, no, no!" Loki didn't care that there was a battle going on. All he had on his mind now was you - and his unborn child. He ran over to you and fell to his knees beside you, gently turning your body around. There was blood and a big, gushing wound on your shoulder. Luckily your shoulder. Loki's shaking hand quickly went to check your pulse. It was there. You were alive. Utter relief flooded his body. "Oh thank the Norns, thank the Norns." He praised; voice breaking. But then he noticed how much blood you were losing and that your bullet wound needed medical attention - unless you were going to die. So, he switched on his communication device. "Banner, get over here. Quick. Third floor. Ladies bathroom." The answer came prompt. "On my way." "Bring every medical supply you can find on your way. And hurry up! It's urgent!"

While Bruce was on his way, Loki sat down beside you. He took one hand of yours into his and placed his other hand on the wound. He wouldn't be able to heal you, but he could slow the blood loss. He closed his eyes for a moment; green seidr starting to flow from his palm. "Hold on, my love. Norns, please hold on. I'm here." Loki squeezed your hand, before he gently let go again to cup your lower stomach. Seidr started to pour out of his other hand as well. He tried to feel the baby; knowing well that it was too early for him to feel him or her. And he was right. He couldn't feel them. He couldn't tell if they were alright or not. With a frustrated groan, he stopped his attempt - just as worried as before. Anyways, he had to try, didn't he?

Only a few minutes later, Bruce came running down the hall. The doctor's eyes widened, when he came to witness the scene in front of him. "What happened?!" It was, of course, as clear as a day what had happened, but the question bubbled out of him nevertheless. "Sniper," Loki answered dryly; then quickly removed his hand, so Bruce could take a look. He nodded; examining your shoulder. "There's an exit wound. That's good. Means the bullet went through. Nevertheless, we have to patch this up. Unless she's going to bleed out. We have to get her out of here." Loki clenched his jaw. "I am very aware of that, Dr. Banner," he hissed. "Just do something. I can't lose her." His teary, frightful and worried eyes met Bruce's brown ones. "Please," Loki added, desperately. The doctor nodded and reached for the medical supplies he found on his way... Plasters, bandages, disinfection, gloves and other things. "I'll try my best to stop the bleeding as good as possible, but- Loki, what are you doing?" Bruce witnessed how the god stood up; eyes focused on something across the grand stairwell. "You got her, Banner?" The doctor frowned, "I-I think so, y-yes, what-" and followed Loki's eyes - and realised. There was a Hydra agent - and Bruce had a guess. He could count one and one together. "Loki, no. Leave him be; I-" The god turned around; the fury and anger in his eyes causing Bruce to clap his mouth immediately shut. "You got her, Banner?" He repeated his question, more firmly this time. Bruce nodded; swallowing hard. "Good." His eyes wandered shortly to the man with bright pink hair again - the one who shot you. Loki recognised him, of course. And when he saw him standing there, he lost it. Completely. Rage was taking over his system like venom. "Guard her with your life," he said and started to walk away; adding in a threatening, dark and intimidating voice: "Or you'll be the next."

Led by his untamed wrath, Loki made his way quickly to that one Hydra soldier; killing every other on his way - without even blinking. He was like in a trance; blinded by his anger. That man had almost taken one of his most precious things in his life away from him - and he couldn't just let that pass. That man was going to pay - right now.

The man with pink hair was about to escape through one of the ventilation shafts, when green seidr hit him; causing him to get thrown to the ground. He tried to reach for his rifle, but the god was quick to kick it away and out of reach for him. Before the man could even stand up and defend himself, Loki had picked him up off the hard ground and literally slammed him against the nearest wall; big hand wrapped around his neck. The man's eyes met the god's furious ones - and he just laughed. "What are you waiting for, huh? Kill me." Loki practically growled, squeezing his neck tighter. "Do you even know with whom exactly you are dealing with and what monster you just unleashed by doing what you did?" Again, the man just laughed - not even trying to fight Loki. "For such a smartass god, you are incredibly stupid, Laufeyson." The god's jaw clenched. He was losing his nerves. "What I did was the only reason I came for. Killing Agent Y/L/N was my job; knowing very well that I'd die here tonight doing it - because of you. So, what are you waiting for. Do it." Those words caused Loki to laugh dangerously - almost hysterically. This man really thought he had killed you. "Possibly. But you are the fool - not me. Being so stupid and trying to take my wife away from me… You have no idea what you have gotten yourself into, little mortal," Loki whispered in a threatening voice and started to shapeshift into his Jotun form.

The man's eyes widened in shock. He didn't know. He didn't know. Loki was towering over him now; ruby eyes glowing dangerously red. "Not so brave and impudent now, are we?" The man just swallowed; still gazing at Loki shocked. "I told you. You have no idea what monster you unleashed..." He stated once more, tightened his grip a bit. "Tell me, mortal... You've got a family?" The man nodded, unable to form any words, due to Loki's strong grip. "A wife? Children?" Another nod. "So you are a father, just like me and nevertheless you agree to take the life of an innocent child's mother? That is pathetic. Weak. Cowardly. You disgust me." Loki spat. "And with that not enough... You almost took two lifes." The man's eyes widened to the size of plates; connecting the dots. "That's right. She's with child. I don't know yet if your headless, rash assassination hurt them, but… You better pray it didn't." And again, Loki tightened his grip, before conjuring a dagger - made out of ice, "But... Actually, if I think this through, you don't have to pray, because you won't get to know. It's time to pay." and rammed the dagger into his stomach, causing the man's jaw to drop and a breathless scream to leave his lips. Loki twisted the dagger and let go of him. The man fell to the ground, gasping and gurgling. The god rounded the man – like a predator its prey, before he squatted down beside him, shifting back into his Æsir form. "Next time you try to take my family away from me, do it right - or better... Don't even try it. Although, I highly doubt there will be a next time." With a clasp on the dying man's shoulder, Loki sauntered away. He had to do it. He just had to.

After Bruce had turned the Quinjet on autopilot; giving it the coordinations of the next hospital, which was fifteen minutes away, he returned to you and Loki. He checked on your wound - which was oozing a bit of blood again, but not as much. Loki's seidr and Bruce's pressure bandage had helped, but so slowly the fabric of the bandage turned from white to red as well... "I already informed the hospital. They'll be ready when we arrive," he informed the god, who stared at your unconscious body. "Good." His eyes were focused on your stomach. Loki was utterly afraid and worried, that the blood loss this bullet wound caused, could've harmed the baby. He just couldn't shake off that thought. It drove him crazy not to know - up to the point where he couldn't take it anymore. So, he had no other option but to tell Bruce...

As soon as he had quenched his thirst for revenge, his mind wandered - of course, back to you. So, without further ado, he made his way back to you.

Bruce was luckily still sitting by your side; two lifeless Hydra men laying a few meters away from them. "How is she?" Loki asked immediately. The doctor turned at the god's voice; facing him. "For the moment, stable. I stopped the bleeding, but the point still stands... She needs medical attention." Then Banner looked Loki up and down, swallowing. "Did you...?" He knew what Bruce meant, and nodded. "I had to." Loki stepped closer to you and knelt down, "Let's get her out of here and to the Quinjet." and gently took you in his arms; carrying you bridal style. "Back me up?" Bruce nodded, and turned quickly to Hulk; watching out for any enemies to come your way.

The three of you made it out of the building and to the Quinjet without any further incident. While Bruce started the engines, Loki laid you slowly down on the stretcher. "Stark. Banner and I are on the Quinjet now, bringing Y/N into a hospital and-" "Yes, yes, I know. Bruce told me. Make sure she's alright." "Are you able to make this without us?" "What kind of question is that, Reindeer Games? Pepper and I are almost done here. The civilians are safe and sound and the Hydra men reduced to a group of ten." Loki rolled his eyes at Tony's comment. "Fine."

"Banner, would you check her stomach and lower abdomen, please?" The doctor frowned. "Why? She's been shot in the shoulder, not in the stomach and-" "Just do it!" Loki cut him off; almost screaming at the man. "Alright, alright, I'll do it. Calm down, man." He went to grab a little device and held it over your stomach. Looking down at the miniature display, and not expecting to find something, Bruce's eyes suddenly widened. He lifted his head, gazing with surprise and a little shocked at the god. "Loki, that... There's... Y/N, she... She's-" "Pregnant, yes." Loki finished his sentence. "That's why I asked you to check. Is the baby alright?" Bruce blinked, and nodded. "Y-Yes, I... As far as I can tell, y-yes." "Oh thank the Norns," the god breathed out relieved. He took your hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze, all the while he leaned down to pepper your stomach with little kisses. "Our baby is okay, my love... They are alright - and you'll be too, I promise," Loki sobbed into the fabric of your dress; holding on to you.

As for Bruce, he clearly needed a moment to grasp this. "How far along is she? How... How long do you know?" Loki turned his head to Bruce and smiled through his tears. "About ten weeks. She told me a month ago, right after she found out. Well, Ella told me, but yes..." Bruce couldn't help but smile as well. He was, of course, happy for you and Loki. "Well, in that case... Congratulations." "Thank you. I'm honestly a bit surprised that Romanoff didn't tell you anything." The doctor's eyes widened. "Natasha knew?!" Loki nodded. "She was the only one who knew. She was with Y/N when she found out." Banner nodded, "Makes sense." before he went to land the Quinjet. "Let's get her help - as fast as possible."

"Mr. Laufeyson, Sir." A doctor ripped him out of his thoughts. Loki literally jumped to his feet, looking at the young man with anticipation and hope. "How is she?" "She's alright according to the circumstances." The god let out a deep, relieved breath he didn't know he was holding. "Oh Norns… Thank you." "She was lucky that the bullet went through and we didn't have to operate." "Is the baby alright?" Not that Loki didn't trust Bruce, but he'd rather have it checked twice - and besides, Loki had to tell the doctors that you were pregnant anyways. "Yes. The baby is safe and sound." He took a deep breath, nodding. "Can I go to her?" "Of course."

While the doctors looked after you and patched the wound up, Loki sat on a chair in front of the wooden door in the white, empty hallway, waiting. Bruce had returned to Tony and Pepper.

Fear and worry were still very present in the god's head, but also guilt. He felt utterly guilty. Guilty of taking you with him on this damn event. Guilty of not accompanying you to the toilets - as stupid as it might sound. Guilty of not having been able to protect you - and his baby. It weighed him down. And nevertheless... He couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't change the past. It happened; and the most important thing now was that you were going to be alright.

No ten minutes later, Loki was sitting by your bedside; your hand in his and patiently waiting for you to wake up. To his sheer relief, he didn't have to wait long. Your eyes fluttered open; blinking; needing to adjust to the bright light. "L-" Loki was it you wanted to say, but your throat felt dry, causing you to not even get his name out. Your husband reacted immediately, of course and reached for the glass of water on your bedside table; gently helping you to drink. "T-Thank you." "Of course, my love." Then you looked around. "Loki, where... Where am I?" "In the hospital." You blinked, before you started to smile. "I survived this?" Loki couldn't help but chuckle softly. "For sure! Do you think I'd let the most important being in my life die?" You smiled even wider, shaking your head. "See?" Loki smiled as well, squeezing your hand. "How are you feeling? Are you in pain?" You shook your head. "No, but... I feel utterly tired." Apparently were the pain killers working just fine yet. "Good, that's good. But you should rest then. Give yourself and our child time to overcome this accident." Your eyes widened on an instant at Loki's words; free hand flying to clutch your stomach (It was luckily not your hurt arm). "Oh my g-gosh, the baby! Are they alright?!" You panicked for a moment, but Loki was quick to reassure you. He placed his free hand on yours. "Don't worry, darling. They are completely fine." "T-Thank god."

Loki's expression changed suddenly; the guilty feeling returning. "My love, I am so sorry. This all is my fault. I promised to protect you... And I failed. I-I wasn't there when you needed me and-" You shook your head, interrupting him. "Let me stop you right there, babe." Intertwining your hand with his, you looked him deeply in his stunning blue eyes. "This is absolutely not your fault. I am the one to blame for this. Not you. I chose to accompany you. I chose to go alone to the bathroom. It was me, not you. You did your absolute best and protected me the best you could." Loki blinked. "But-" "Ah.Ah. No but's. Please... Don't blame yourself."

Your husband took a deep breath; running a hand through his luscious curls. "I... I could've lost you, Y/N. And our child. Ella could've lost her mother." "I know... But you didn't. Ella didn't. I'm here. I'm alive. The baby is alive. We are both okay - and we will make this. My shoulder's going to heal." Despite your words, there was still hesitation in his eyes. So, you tugged gently at his hand, "C'mere." encouraging him to lean down. He did what you asked him to, and leaned down. You didn't hesitate; pulled him instantly in a kiss. It was so loving and intense; almost taking Loki's breath away. "Stop. Blaming. Yourself," you mumbled in between kisses. Loki couldn't help but smirk; brushing your nose with his. "Only if you keep on kissing me." "Pfft," you laughed and shook your head, but kept on kissing him.

Once Loki assured himself, that you were, indeed alright - according to the circumstances, he decided to take a trip home and tell Ella and his parents what had happened. He had to. So, he stayed with you the whole day, night and even the next day, before he left on the following morning; travelling to Asgard.

"My, my, what do we have here? Is this a tea party? And I am not invited?" Loki asked; approaching them. Ella's head snapped, of course, immediately into his direction after hearing her father's voice. "Daddy!" She squeaked out excitedly and scrambled to stand up. Loki knew what was about to come, so he squatted down and opened his arms. Ella came running and threw herself into Loki's awaiting embrace. He swiped her off her feet and lifted the girl up; hugging her tightly. Ella giggled; both her little arms tangling around his neck. "Ah, my little princess... I missed you." "I missed you too, daddy." Loki kissed her cheek, before letting her down again.

"Welcome back, prince Loki." Heimdall greeted him with a bow of his head. Loki gave him a nod. "Heimdall." "Bear my best recovery wishes for her - and congratulations." The prince smiled. "Thank you. I shall do that."

On a horse, the god made his way to the palace. "Greetings, my prince." The guards welcomed him and let him inside, of course, where he asked for his daughter and parents. Loki got told, that Ella was with his mother in the royal gardens and the Allfather caught up in a court meeting with the royal advisors of the king from Svartalfheim. So, Loki went to the gardens. He could already see his princess and mother from afar. They were sitting on a soft blanket, which laid underneath a cherry tree, in order to shield them from the sun. Both of them had tea cups in their hands and he could swear that he also saw two big slices of cake. Loki couldn't help the smile, which spread over his lips at the scene in front of him - and when he heard Ella's sweet laughter, it only widened.

Frigga just watched with a smile on her face. She loved seeing her son being a father. "Mother," Loki greeted her; kissing her cheek as well. "Hello, son. You're back early." At her words, the god got taken back in time; remembering what had happened. "I know. I'll explain. But first..." He turned back to Ella, tickling her. Again, she bursted into fits of giggles. "I'd like to have a biiiig slice of cake. It looks so very delicious. Princess, would you go to the kitchen and ask Bjørn, if he would be so nice and give me a slice?" "O-Okay, daddy," Ella panted; still giggling and trying to recover from her dad's tickle attack. "You're a treasure, thank you." Ella smiled, then hopped away. The skirts of her pink summer dress billowing in the wind; raven curls, which just reached her shoulders, bobbing.

"I have the feeling you want to tell me something without my grandchild listening..." Frigga noted. She wasn't stupid. Loki nodded, "I do, mother." and swallowed. "I... Have good news and bad news." Loki pondered about with which news to start, but then decided on the good news. His parents didn't know yet that they were going to be grandparents - again. Perhaps this was the time to tell them. Well, at least Frigga. He'd come around the next few days to tell his father as well. Actually, Loki wanted to do this with you, but... The current circumstances didn't allow it. Hopefully you wouldn't be mad at him...

"The good news is; Y/N is... Well, she's pregnant again."

For the second time, Frigga's eyes widened - but this time out of shock. "Oh by the Norns! How is she?! Did it affect your child?" "She's alright - according to the circumstances. The bullet went through, so they didn't need to operate. She lost a lot of blood, but we made it in time to the hospital. Luckily, it didn't affect the child. They are safe and sound, steadily growing in their mother's womb." A relieved breath left the Allmother's lips. "Indeed... That's why I am back earlier. I'll take Ella with me now and tell her. Y/N's dying to see her baby again," he stated with a small chuckle. Frigga nodded. "Of course, my son." Just in that moment, they noticed Ella returning - carrying a plate with a big slice of cake on top. "Please greet her and wish her all the best. And tell us if she's getting better!" Loki took his mother's hand and squeezed it. "I will do that, for sure."

Frigga's eyes widened. "Pregnant?" The god nodded with a smile; almost unable to hold back the tears. "Yes, mother. We're having another baby." The queen gasped; hand flying to cover her mouth. She tried to hold back the tears again. "Oh Loki..." She more or less sobbed, before lunching forwards to hug him. "That's wonderful, son. I'm so delighted and happy for you and Y/N." Loki hugged her even tighter. "Me too. I'm honestly a little surprised that Ella didn't tell you. Well, we told her to not do it, but... You know how excited, small children are... We wouldn't have been mad at her if it had slipped past her lips, but well..." Frigga just giggled. "It would've been a great way to find out as well." "Oh definitely!" Loki chuckled; pausing. "I, uh, wish to tell father as well. I'm coming back in the next few days as soon as he has got more time." His mother smiled, "My lips shall be sealed then." but it dropped quite quickly again. "I'm a little afraid of the bad news now..."

"Well..." Loki started; thoughts returning to the accident once more. "We, um, we were on that charity event and... And there was an attack." He fumbled with his fingers. "I swore to protect Y/N and couldn't in that very moment. She's... She's been shot in the shoulder and is in the hospital now."

After Loki had eaten the delicious cake and spent a bit of quality time with his mother and daughter; he decided to return to you, taking Ella with him. They both bid their goodbyes and off they went through the Bifrost; only to land in a hospital - much to Ella's confusion...

"Uhh, daddy? Why are we in a hospital?" The little girl looked around; seemed quite a bit frightened. "Where's... Where's mommy?" Loki's heart felt already heavy; having to tell his child what had happened. He took a deep breath and squatted down in front of Ella, to be on eye-level with her, and took her smaller hands in his. "You know we were away to attend an Avengers thingy?" She nodded; getting visibly more nervous and angsty. "Unfortunately, we've got attacked by some really bad guys and... Mommy got hurt - but she's okay, sweetheart! She has a wound that needs to heal, but she will be perfectly fine!" Loki immediately went to calm her down, since her eyes started to get watery; tears running down her cheeks promptly. "M-Mommy's hurt? What happened?" The god swallowed. "A man tried to shoot mommy and hit her shoulder," Loki explained; gently wiping the little girl's tears away with his thumbs.

"Can… Can I see mommy?" "Of course, princess. That's why we're here." He smiled softly; looking down at his daughter, who resembled him so much. "Come here." Loki then just scooped her up in his arms; hugging her and carrying her to the room you were in. He didn't care that Ella got heavier so slowly; being not a toddler anymore. She held onto her dad, burying her face in his neck and hair. It had been clearly a shook for the little girl to learn that her mother was hurt in a hospital...

Loki gently knocked on your door and waited patiently for an answer. "Come in!" You were awake. Loki freed one hand and opened the door; stepping inside. Your eyes immediately lit up, when you saw your husband and daughter. You were so happy to see Ella. You had missed her - a lot. When you saw that Loki was carrying her, you knew exactly what was going on...

"Princess, hey," you greeted Ella softly, after your husband had carried her over to your bed. She was still clinging to her dad, but when she felt your touch on her back and especially heard your voice, her head snapped to face you. Her cheeks were reddened - just like her eyes, in which were still tears glistening. It definitely teared at your heartstrings. "Oh no, sweetie... Come here." You opened your arm (the one which wasn't hurt) for her. Loki immediately let her down and she didn't hesitate even a second; ran into your arm as quickly as possible. Sure, Ella had to overcome the obstacle which was the hospital bed; but that didn't stop her.

"Mommy," she sobbed; clinging now to you. She may have been already a big girl, but in moments like this, she was still just a child - which was more than alright. "Don't cry, baby. I'm ok." You stroked her hair in a reassuring manner and pressed soft, little kisses to the crown of her head. Exchanging a look with your husband, you could tell that it hurt him as well; seeing his daughter sad and crying. It always did.

Once you managed to calm her down, you were in for a long round of cuddles. Ella laid in your arm, cuddled against your side. At some point she had just slept in. Perhaps from the exciting vacation she's been on. Perhaps from the shock. Anyways, you were just glad she had calmed down - and so was Loki, who sat beside your bed on a chair. His oceanic blue eyes watching over you and his princess. He still had to tell you that his mother knew now about the little wonder growing within you, but that was a story for another time.

[cecilyv]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @screamlet

1. How many works do you have an AO3? 14 (and, full disclosure, all but some of the tumblr fics are with @liminalmemories21)

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 151,628

3. What fandoms do you write for? 9-1-1

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? In order: Awful quiet here since love fell asleep (9-1-1, the break up, make up fic), Atlas (bound) (9-1-1, the Buckley parents are trash fic), Baggage that goes with mine (9-1-1, Tommy begins), (I'm in love) but I do not speak the language (9-1-1, the relationship discovery one), and I'll cover you (9-1-1, part II after Baggage, when Buck and Tommy get a dog).

5. Do you respond to comments? I really try. @liminalmemories21 is much better at it than I am, but I do always intend to because each comment is my best beloved.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Erm, we don't really write angsty things? Awful quiet, Atlas and Inside, You've Got Heaven and Earth all start angsty, but don't end there?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Oh, god, uh, probably What's with today, today? Mostly just because making them all librarians on Stuffie Day itself was an indulgent turducken of a dessert.

8. Do you get hate on fics? not so far, thankfully

9. Do you write smut? a hundred percent more than I ever imagined

10. Do you write crossovers? I drop them in Lim's chat all the time but one has never stuck. Like, the one from this week was Wolfram and Heart is based in LA and reopens and... I don't know, Lindsey sticks around with his evil hand? THNK OF BUCK AND FREAKING OUT WITH THE CURSES AND THE RESEARCH SPIRALS AND...

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Err, all of the recent ones because I am nothing (fandom-wise) without Lim

14. What's your all time favorite ship? I have no answer for this. I read like, a decade's worth of Stiles/Derek and literally never watched an episode of the show, but I watched SO MUCH Stargate because John/Rodney, my beloveds. I am still a sucker for a good Arthur/Eames. I would bow down if people brought back silver foxes Fraser/RayK. It's hard to have favorites after over 30 years in fandom.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Lim and I poke things to death, and definitely don't post a lot of them because we can't imagine things not being done before we put them out in the world -- see the Merlin fic of epicness that we started way over a decade ago and still sits in our google docs.

16. What are your writing strengths? I also think this is a thing best answered by others, like hi, Lim, how do I help? I honestly think I'm a better editor than writer? I'm not good about setting scenes, but I'm pretty good about taking drafts and massaging them?

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I always want things to feel more lived in than I feel I can accomplish on my own.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I speak english and bad english, so I am terrible about this, but I totally understand that sometimes its warranted.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Popslash and Smallville, and hi, yes, I disappeared for two decades.

20. Favorite fics you've written?

Awful quiet did exactly what I wanted that fic to when we set out to write it, and while maybe I wish some of the OCs were handled better/differently, I'm still happy with how we got from the beginning to end.

The What Binds series definitely put Tommy in a place and time, and there's a reason there's four stories worth of it (hi, I'm super proud of the detail about Tommy losing his virginity to Dave Matthew Band because, come on, people).

I know that Inside, You've Got Heaven and Earth didn't really hit with people, but it addressed something I wanted to fiddle with for Buck and Tommy, and Lim was a trooper for going there with me.

[dangermousie]

OK, now that I finished Beyond Evil, after I catch up on the backlog of all the airing dramas I put aside to watch this, what should be my next kdrama binge watch or rewatch?

Candidates:

The Nokdu Flower - it's dark and grim and period and I love the cast and I've loved the first two eps and I keep meaning to watch forever.

Circle - clearly I am on a Yeo Jin Goo kick, so why break the streak? Honestly, the kid hasn't made a drama I didn't love except for Absolute Boyfriend (I loved that manga but it made a terrible drama for three separate countries so perhaps it's just not a story that can ever be adapted, pls leave it alone people.) Also it seems scifi and I love the rest of the cast.

That Winter the Wind Blows - I got to ep 5 in my rewatch ages ago and got sidetracked but that exquisite cast and romance and intensity and angst and I've been a Jo In Sung fangirl since forever.

Padam Padam - once again a rewatch and that angst and romance and second chances and that cast. Also, it's been so long I genuinely don't remember, but perhaps the ML should join that whole "accused of murder but innocent" list I made.

Mawang - a rare perfect kdrama, the one I meant to rewatch before being dragged into BE world.

Hello Monster - to keep up with being on a tormented detectives and serial killers kick, plus I meant to watch that forever.

Fates and Furies - old school melo and I watched first few eps when aired and adored it. Plus a rare drama where JSW plays the good guy and I am a sucker for the whole "woman is hired to wreck the man but falls for him" set up.

Whisper - rewatch of one of my all time faves, where a fallen cop and a fallen judge fight each other but then fight together to take down the evil and powerful and there is tension and UST and dysfunction and perfection.

(why yes, she's muffling his moaning from his wounds with her mouth)

Nine: Nine Times Time Travel - I remember it being mega acclaimed and it's from the writer of Queen In Hyun's Man and W so...

You Are My Spring - I love me some Kim Dong Wook

Find Me In Your Memory - I love me some Kim Dong Wook AND Moon Ga In and the set up is such angsty melo.

The Girl Who Sees Smells - to keep up with the whole detective who lost family to serial killer getting involved with someone who is also tied to it set up, plus I love the leads.

Anyway, here is your chance to vote and provide input and then see me freak out about whatever for a week straight. (Beyond Evil won last time and you saw how insane I went.) So POLL:

[redfour0]

Anyway here is my redo of starwars

part one

(longer post)

Everything changes because Obi-Wan actually hates politicians. Sorta.

Instead of just stabbing him, Maul slices Qui-Gon diagonally as PadObi-Wan gets into the room, causing his master to poof. Obi-Wan still gets Maul, like in canon, and everything progresses like normal.

So besides that its just Obi-Wan hating politicians.

For about five years. Now 14 yo Anakin goes to Obi-Wan to talk about the fact that he still has a crush on Padme (bc palps isn't whispering lies into his ear), and Obi-Wan says "Ani its been five years you met her once I don't want to be rude but please get over it" or some Jedi version of that. Anakin eventually does, and continues on as a padawan till AOTC.

The pair are still assigned to protect Padme, but Anakin sees her as more of big sister than anything else. The trip to Naboo only solidifies that. Since he is more open with his master, Anakin tells Obi-wan about his visions of his mom, and she was given slight protective measures, so she never get taken by the tuskins. Obi-Wan finds the clones, gets trapped on Geonosis, sends out the signal, which still get to Anakin because he was being a silly boi and visiting his mother with Padme.

Much of AOTC is similar, but Anakin doesn't lose his hand because he is smart and waits for Obi-Wan. Dooku still gets them with a force shove, escaping (for now).

Anakin is still a padawan during the war now, losing his hand to Dooku on Christophsis because Dooku went there instead of Asajj. Anakin is knighed after that, getting Ahsoka and a note telling Obi-Wan "field knight him ;)" from Yoda (or some jedi equivalent of that). Anakin doesn't know what to do with the padawan braid so he just pockets it for now.

Now that TCW has started, Anakin and Obi-Wan are sent their separate ways as they fight around the galaxy, meeting up every few weeks to fight together (they happen to be besties, along with their commander and captain).

Enter the fact that I, at heart, am a hopeless romantic and a sucker for forbidden love. Rex and Anakin are together by the year one mark. Dispite the two of them being terrible at lying, obvious, over all STUPID- no one finds out. In fact, everyone outside their inner circle think Anakin and Padme are dating, despite many people (mainly said inner circle) walking in on them

Cody and Obi-Wan end up together by year two, both much better at hiding it and being aware of their surroundings. No one ever finds out.

[choicesficwriterscreations]

December Creator of the Month: Oh-So-Youre-a-Nerd

Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists, and this month’s creator of the month is @oh-so-youre-a-nerd . We're very excited because Ascindio is our very first artist to be highlighted! We hope you will enjoy learning more about them and their work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog Instagram

How do you want to be known on Tumblr? 

Ascindio 

More below...

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played? 

I started playing in 2016, I can't remember if I read Endless Summer or Rules of Engagement first, but I ended up deleting the app after like 2 weeks cause I couldn't stop buying diamonds 😅🤦

I re-downloaded it about, ohh idk 2 years ago?

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

I joined the Fandom specifically on Tumblr and specifically for It Lives Within, which happened to come out right after I read the first two books 

3- How did you pick your blog name? 

I always try to seem cool and mysterious when I meet people irl, and then as soon as I open my mouth, I ruin it with some niche trivia or something, and they say,  “Oh, so you're a nerd.” 😂 Can't tell you how many times this exact phrase has been uttered to me. 

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!  

This is the first Choices related post I made 😂 I was just thinking about the concept of what if characters make terrible decisions cause they're controlled by a player who is out of diamonds lol I was going to do a whole series of them (next was going to be lotr “fly on eagles to mordor?” *30 diamonds* or “simply walk”) but got lazy lol

5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both? 

Only art. God, I  WISH  I wrote too. I've thought about trying cause I have so many ideas floating around in my head, but at the end of the day, I'd rather spend my free time drawing. 

6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?

For Choices, since early 2022

For other fandoms, since well, forever, but I only started posting around 2017/18

7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?

Favorite Choices book is probably It Lives in the Woods. All of the characters were so interesting, I never got bored reading it, and it had an incredible twist that made sense but I still didn't see coming. 

Favorite to create for is probably Blades of Light and Shadow though because I am such a sucker for the fantasy aesthetic.

8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?.

This isn't the first Choices art I made, but it IS the first I actually shared

And honestly, I DO still like it because I still remember the way I felt absolutely POSSESSED while drawing it (I hadn't drawn anything for *months*). I would definitely change the background, though. Those trees look like shit, and they're not even the correct type for the kind of forest they're in. 

9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created? 

My favorite Choices art I've done is probably this piece. 

10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?

I definitely didn't expect this one to do well at all as it was so hastily drawn

And I was sad this piece didn't get more love, it was such a dope scene and I was so excited about how the sword turned out

11- If you could only draw one style or type of art for the rest of your life, what would it be and why? 

I'm not sure if I'm interpreting the question right, but if I had to pick like a specific type of art, it would be digital, and I would want to do fan art. I have a hard time painting anything that I don't already have a deep connection with (so original art with no story behind it is usually a chore for me), and digital art is just so incredibly convenient and not messy and so so versatile. 

12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

Because I use fiction as a way to safely process trauma/ grief/ other big emotions, each MC I make has a small part of me, whichever part I feel the need to explore at the time.

There's an amazing quote by Patrick Rothfuss that I feel explains it perfectly. 

It's from Wise Man's Fear

“These folk knew all about death. They killed their own livestock. They died from fevers, falls, or broken bones gone sour. Death was like an unpleasant neighbor. You didn’t talk about him for fear he might hear you and decide to pay a visit.

Except for stories, of course. Tales of poisoned kings and duels and old wars were fine. They dressed death in foreign clothes and sent him far from your door. A chimney fire or the croup cough were terrifying. But Gibea’s trial or the siege of Enfast, those were different. They were like prayers, like charms muttered late at night when you were walking alone in the dark. Stories were like ha’penny amulets you bought from a peddler, just in case.”

13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most?

I have a very difficult time making the poses seem natural and flowing. My all time favorite art is Baroque/Renaissance style and how fluid the poses are, how soft the skin looks, how delicately it's all done. Obviously, I will always have my own style, but those are things that I so want to incorporate but never seem to get quite right, and it drives me crazy 😂

14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

Not really. I mean, I have a ton of unfinished work, but as soon as the window of inspiration passes, I just can't get myself to care enough about it to finish it (insert Jake the Dog, “now it's gone, and I don't care about it anymore!” )

15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first? 

I would, and have.  I typically show them whatever most rendered recent picture from my Instagram because I don't post any nsfw there and usually try to post only my prettier work for this specific reason haha. (As opposed to here, I post everything here, ain't NO ONE from real life invited to see my tumblr 😂)

16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?

Writers: Brandon Sanderson, for sure. He's the reason I got back into art back in 2017 ish. His stories are just so emotional they push me to create. Same with @saibug1022, there is always at least one scene from every story he shares that I desperately want to draw to try to capture the emotions. 

Artists: God, sooo many, here are just like my top 3 favorites and their instagrams.

Audra Auclair

Obsessed with her unique style, and specifically the way she draws eyelids and noses

f3lc4t

The way they draw those dripping, glowing wisps. I stare at their pieces for hours (no lie) trying to dissect them stroke by stroke to figure out how they do it.

Miho Hirano

Their art has a delicate whimsy-ness I would SELL MY SOUL to achieve 

17- Which one of your creations would you like to see a fiction written about? 

JC, this is the shit I DREAM of.

Definitely this one. 

So this is love.

This little comic means a lot to me. 

18- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art? 

Very rarely, but I do, every so often. This is my favorite original piece.

20-  What other hobbies do you have?

Gaming, singing, walking through the Cemetary with my wee daughter, reading, that's about it 🤷

21 - What’s your favorite emoji? 

🙇

22: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).

I really wanted to say that I don't believe in “good” art and “bad” art (just ethical vs non-ethical). That being said, I know what it's like to hate your art, like soooo intimately. If you ever are feeling shit about your art, you can ABSOLUTELY message me (I don't care if we're mutuals or not, I don't care if we've never interacted before) and just say, “I am feeling shit about my art” and I will go through your art and tell you every specific thing I love about it and why it's wonderful. I am not joking; I am so so serious rn. 💗💗💗💗 

[thecrystalkid]

what is your opinion on the tdc Netflix show?

i haven’t posted in a billion years but HII thanks for the ask!!!

it’s been a hot minute since i’ve rewatched the show, so it’s far from being fresh in my mind, and i’m of course not an expert on it. all the same, i still have a lot of thoughts and opinions* on it (*some of these might be a lil controversial as far as the TDCAOR fandom goes but i’m not trying to attack or criticize anyone for enjoying anything in this show, go in peace, ily❤️)

the show itself

to be honest, AOR has never been my favorite installment in the TDC franchise. i’m very attached to the original movie and jen and kira, so i think the obvious absence of them in the show may have played a part in that

but this^^ has nothing to do with the fact that the show is an objective masterpiece of artistry. it’s overwhelming how immersive and beautiful every inch of the environment is within thra, and whatever the creative team and everyone involved with the making of the show were paid, it’s not enough.

the design and craft of the gelfling is another thing i’m obsessed with, i loved the distinctive fashion and presentation of every clan (especially drenchen i love u drenchen) and just the sheer quality of every individual puppet. there’s something so uncanny and beautiful about the realistic skin, hair, and eyes of the gelfling, each one is so mesmerizing to watch.

sadly, i’ve always kind of disliked the overall voice-acting of the show. i love taron egerton, anya taylor-joy, etc. as much as the next person, but personally, their voices seemed so detached from their characters, which i think could be partially attributed to the fact that several of the actors are not professional voice actors

i’m beating the very dead horse here but i’m never not devastated that the show was cancelled when it was. it may not have been my favorite installment in TDC but not knowing what ultimately became of deet haunts me forever and always

not a day goes by that i’m not sad that lisa maxwell (kira’s voice actor) didn’t do the opening narration for the show. i didn’t even know that was a possibility until i listened to a podcast episode about it and found out lisa was originally going to do it. i still love sigourney weaver but like come on.

characters n in-universe stuff

one thing i love about the show is how many sibling relationships it explores. as someone with older sisters i obviously am a sucker for the dynamic between brea, tavra, and seladon. i always love seeing an absolute gutpunch soul-crushing diabolical sister relationship in media, the mirroring each other, bringing out the best and worst of each other, i love it it’s terrible. also gurjin and naia, i’m also a sucker for comedic siblings

i really really hate to say it but i’m not a fan of rian and deet as a romantic pairing. i just never really felt any chemistry between the two of them, and the fact that their whole thing started so shortly after the death of mira has always personally rubbed me the wrong way. obviously i’m not here to beat up stonegrot enjoyers, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with the pairing or people who enjoy it, it’s just not for me. i love and am happy for stonegrot folk, god bless <3

augh you know what pairing i do like though is brea and kylan, this whole post could be about them. idk, i know it’s one of those things where they barely have any interaction with each other but i always die at kylan’s little “and brea!” when they’re rescuing them all, and i would’ve DIED for an interaction between them where they discover they both can read

i do also really love how the show explored the skeksis and mystics being two halves of the same whole, and how that relationship can differ. it’s one of the most interesting concepts from the og movie and i’m glad it was expanded upon

i’m sure this may have been being saved for a possible continuation of the show but i would’ve loved a deeper look at each individual gelfling clan, like a really detailed thorough episode(s) about the life/history of each clan (dousan especially i feel like they were skimped on the most)

i, like many, am obsessed with aughra, and i love that she played such a major role in the show. i love how they showcased her maternal role and connection to the gelfling and thra, whilst always keeping her stern, choppy personality present

this is just my conspiracy theory but on the subject of who jen and kira’s respective parents are, i choose to imagine it’s not anyone in the AOR cast and just some other gelfling we never/haven’t met

wow that was a lot of yapping but again thanks for the ask!! i love being able to just dump all my thoughts into one place, it’s always very fun! 

[esseastri]

Nicole's Favorite Books That She Read in 2024!

I think I missed doing this post the last few years, but let's get back on the train, shall we?

In no particular order, we have:

The Book of Ile-Rein, by Martha Wells: I've been gobbling up all the Martha Wells backlist that Tor has been reprinting, and I adored this set. Element of Fire was a classic and Death of the Necromancer was a romp. Both were fun for very different reasons, but as always I love Martha's characters too much.

Lady Eve's Last Con, by Rebecca Fairmow: Oh, what an absolute DELIGHT of a novel! Full of 1820s etiquette and elegance, 1920s glitz and glam, 2020s swag and shenanigans, and 2120s gravity and grit, this book is fast and fun. The characters are unforgettable, the plot is unputdownable, and the romance is to die for. The most fun you've had at a zero-g engagement gala, for sure.

The River Has Roots, by Amal El-Mohtar: Comes out in March 2025!: I cannot put into coherent words how very much I love Amal El-Mohtar's writing. It's just so beautiful. Lyrical and clever, intricate but open, so full of heart. This book was written with so much love, and it shows. I could wrap myself in this story like it's a scarf and just wander its sentences forever.

The City in Glass, by Nghi Vo: God, this book is so beautiful, but it made me full-body sob for an entire chapter, so I guess, be aware. This book is about grief. Loss and hurt and anger and grief. It is absolutely gorgeous.

Parable of the Sower, by Octavia Butler: It's really hard to rate this book because it was amazing and also horrifying. So many terrible things happen, but the book is beautiful, too. Despite the fact that everything that can go wrong in Lauren's life does, in fact, go wrong, she is so hopeful. She's got something to believe in, and she is so tenacious. I hated this book and I also loved it. And I am so deeply angry at every literature class I took that didn't teach Octavia Butler.

The Dead Cat Tail Assassins, by P Djeli Clark: I don't think P. Djèlí Clark is capable of writing a thing I don't like. His prose is just magical, his ideas are brilliant, his characters are wonderful, and his books just fill me with joy. This was hilarious and brutal and fun and sad and I loved it. I loved it so much.

Mammoths at the Gates, by Nghi Vo: If you haven't read the Singing Hills, don't start with this one, go back and read the first three. But then read this one. This one is about grief and it is beautiful.

Swordcrossed, by Freya Marske: The Midnight Bargain's less magical and much spicier cousin, this book is an absolute delight. I'm a sucker for a snarky con man with a heart of gold, so I was sold on Luca from page one, but Matti crept up on me and I found myself loving his seriousness and his sneaky sense of humor, too. Personally, I want the Maya and Sofia POV of this book, because I love those two women more than I can explain, but I'm content with the disaster boys getting the spotlight, too. A great, low-stakes romp though business espionage, sword lessons, guild intrigue, "sword lessons", and the wildest wedding this town has ever seen, Swordcrossed is just fun. So much fun.

A Novel Love Story, by Ashley Poston: This one is about how books by your favorite authors have the ability to change the course of your life, and I just wish Ashley could know that she's that author for me. I love this book.

Howl's Moving Castle, by Diana Wynne Jones: I'm still not sure how I somehow managed to miss this book entirely, but god, it is SO SWEET and I LOVE IT SO MUCH. It wraps up very quickly at the end, but honestly, that feels very Howl--slapdash and manic and wild. I love how Sophie is the embodiment of "This Might As Well Happen." I just really love them all. What a good book.

Godkiller, by Hannah Kaner: I loved Kissen from page one, and Elo is such a soft boy he was irresistible, and I love the worldbuilding of this strange, godful land sO MUCH. The circle of people creating gods who create people and destroy them so the people must destroy them is such a fascinating design for faith and belief, and I loved the exploration of it.

The Mars House, by Natasha Pulley: Have you ever gotten mad at an author for being too good at writing words? For taking deep, dark, heavy topics like prejudice and fear, anger and murder, right versus good versus kind--and making them beautiful and delicate? For taking harsh edges and writing them in such a way that they seem like soft candlelight? For taking real science and feeding enough fiction into it that you hope this is how the world turns out because maybe, if it were real, then things might be okay a long time from now? Anyway, I've finished this book and I am pissed off that I finished it because what the hell do I read now?

City of Bones, by Martha Wells: While I don't jive with the title of this book (and I'm not sure the book jives with it either), I loved everything else about it. Wells is an absolute master of characters, especially non-human characters that end up being the most human and the best of them. Khat is no exception, and falls in with Murderbot, Moon, and Kai on my favorites list. I love a person who is too deeply good for their own safety. And Wells writes these doofuses perfectly. It's a slow start and a soft story (surprisingly soft, considering how dark it can be), but if you can give it a little patience and attention, this book--like its main character--will open up to you and reward you greatly for your time.

[spacelazarwolf]

tldr scroll down to see my new plants.

this is a departure from my usual posts, it's a bit more like hybrid blog/diary entry, idk, but here u go.

for those of y'all who don't know, one of my hobbies is plants. i like to collect them propagate them, trade them, etc. and my favorite type of plant is aroids, particularly philodendrons. it was a very difficult hobby to maintain after the plant boom during lockdown caused plant prices to skyrocket, so for the past year or two i haven't relaly been buying that many new plants, and when i have it's just been from garden centers or local nurseries.

yesterday, however, i went to an aroid show where there was a vendor from south america who had brought a bunch of specimens people could purchase. they're a family owned business that focuses on protection and preservation of biodiversity and native plant species, and all their plants are ethically sourced, usually grown in their own greenhouses from propagations instead of taking them from their natural habitat and selling them. so obviously i had to check them out.

but this is where i sort of pause while writing this post, because i get really nervous talking about spending money, especially on here. i've frequently asked for help when i needed assistance getting my account out of the red or paying late rent, so part of me feels like it would be insulting to post about things i spend money on that aren't the essentials. but my plants make me happy. they give me something to take care of. they brighten up my apartment. they give me something to be excited about. so i'm just gonna tell you about my new plants.

about a month ago when i left my old church job, they gave me a gift card that the choir had pitched in for. i couldn't get cash out, use it for rent, or transfer it to my bank account, so i decided it would be my hobby fund. when i found out about the aroid show, i set aside a portion of that fund for plants because i knew that the specimens at the show would be significantly less expensive than anything i could find online or in local shops, and it might be one of the only chances i would ever have to actually buy some of my wishlist plants.

this is a philodendron esmeraldense. this is what they look like when the leaves get bigger and more mature. this is one i hadn't seen before so it wasn't on my wishlist, but when i was checking the vendors' stock last week i loved how it looked. i'm gonna put it on a moss pole and let it climb. the leaves probably won't ever get as big as the one in the linked photo, but i'm still excited to watch it grow.

this is a terrible picture but this is a philodendron patriciae. they get super long. this one’s putting out like two new leaves. it’s also a climber. the ripples in the leaves get more intense as it matures, so paired with the very long leaves it looks so cool. i can't wait to grow this one bigger.

philodendron pastazanum. it’s a crawler so i’ll be getting a window box to put it in so it has space to grow across the substrate. this has been on my list for a while but i couldn’t find it anywhere. the big heart leaves are just gorgeous.

this is a philodendron melanochrysum. the leaves can get huge. technically i already have a smaller one, but this one was just so gorgeous. i will probably end up planting them together on one moss pole. it’s one of my favorite plants, i am a sucker for velvety leaves. you can see one of the older leaves is getting ready to drop, and i think i'm going to try to make a project out of it.

philodendron tortum. it feels like the kind of plant that would have been growing while the dinos were around. it's very reminiscent of a fern, but it is also a climber. i had one like two years ago but i had to sell it to pay some bills, so i'm happy to have it back in my collection.

the one in the center. anthurium veitchii, or king anthurium. this one was kind of an impulse buy. i don’t usually do anthurium but it was cheap and looked incredibly cool. they look even cooler when they get mature.

what is a king without his queen. anthurium warocqueanum, or queen anthurium. i wasn't sure if i wanted to tackle this one bc it's notoriously hard to take care of, but it was very cheap so i took the plunge. these also get super long, and the velvety shiny leaves are so pretty.

monstera obliqua peru. this was a unicorn plant. it is difficult to find in the wild, grows slowly, and is hard to propagate, so it was mostly just passed from collector to collector until the plant boom during covid. nodes of this plant, literally just bits of stem you would cross your fingers and hope would root and grow leaves, were going for a thousand dollars and a single leaf up to three thousand dollars a year or two ago. and now i have a very full plant for only forty bucks. 2020 me is screaming. this specimen looks a little squished from the trek from south america to the midwest, but when it acclimates to its new environment, it's going to look so cool. this is another plant that has dino vibes.

and finally the grand finale. philodendron spiritus sancti. i honestly can't believe i'm typing this. this plant is considered to be one of the rarest philodendrons in the world - if not the rarest. it only grows in one place, and there are reportedly only 10 known plants left in the wild because of a combination of poaching and the excessive clearing of their habitat. it was another one that pretty much only existed in high level (wealthy) collections for a very long time. now, more specimens of this plant exist in private collections than in the wild, which makes ownership of this plant very emotional for me. this is a plant that was going for upwards of $14k for large specimens at the height of the plant boom. people were scrambling to get their hands on that one plant that no one could get, the highest prize, a bragging point. no one cared if they were getting it ethically. someone even stole a cutting from a botanical garden just to sell it.

this plant was not on my wishlist because i never thought i would even get to see in person, let alone hold, let alone own. and yet yesterday i picked it up, held it in my hands, saw the two digit price tag, and decided yeah. i think it's only fair that the money a bunch of presbyterians gave me should go to adding a plant called a "spiritus sancti" to my jewish plant collection.

it still doesn't feel real. i can just look over at my plant cabinet, and there it is. a spiritus sancti. bc for me it was never about having a big name plant in my collection. it was never about bragging or showing off or just checking names off a list of things i was supposed to want if i was into houseplants. this plant still exists because botanists and aroid enthusiasts have worked tirelessly to conserve it. and having this little piece of history and the world in my little plant cabinet feels more like a responsibility to me than a prize.

so yeah. those are my new plants. i'm excited to see them grow and still a little starstruck that i was even able to bring home the last two.