#i always wanted to put into words why I adore Martina and this is the closest I'll get

[austajunk]

Okay, on a second playthrough of Rain Code and I really got a better look at Martina's mindset in general.

I honestly forgot how genuinely power hungry and downright diabolical she is. It's honestly mesmerizing how into her power trip she is during Chapter Two's case. She's so confident, she even licks an open jar of poison just to make a point that it's expired.

Now the reason why I don't recall her power trip and destructive, cruel nature was because it was all wiped away as soon as Yomi ordered her executed for making him look bad. In a second, Martina's terrified and pathetic and in the same way as Seth Burroughs, her fate left unknown to the viewer until Chapter Four.

It makes me think about how police forces are pretty much conditioned and told to go buck wild, to show no mercy, to enact cruelty and subjugation on civilians until they get their way. They get off on it. It's a power trip. Anyone who tries to show restraint on the force is routinely harassed until they quit or find themselves in trouble.

And this is what I really like about Martina as a character. There just isn't any excuse for her. She wanted power and control. She enjoyed it. Being an Amaterasu Peacekeeper gave her a way to enact power over others. Kissing up to Yomi, who I'm pretty sure her "love" and "adoration" for was quite shallow, gave her power and control. And it's addicting. It feels good.

Until she realizes that it's an illusion and someone like Yomi is just using her till he's done with her. She thought she endeared herself to him so much that she wasn't disposable like everyone else in Kanai Ward. But it isn't true and Yomi can just quite literally smash her up into a cube without a problem.

The next time we see Martina, she has undergone a lot of change. A near-death painful execution scare definitely pry your eyes open with a wrench and make you take a look at just how cruel you have been as well as the system you propped up.

She's self-reflective enough to the point that she tells Makoto she will resign from the Peacekeepers even though he says she doesn't have to (which is great in itself because it's powerful that Makoto stepping aside to let her make that choice *herself*). Martina orders the arrest on Yomi, but it's more than just sweet payback. She puts forward the example that criminals are human beings and meant to be treated with equality, fairness and respect. And it makes Yomi scream and lose his goddamn mind.

But more than that, Martina knows she isn't done with atoning, quits the Peacekeepers, and is aiding in rebuilding Kanai Ward. She gains autonomy and lets power go to become a better person.

And I loved every second of this arc. My only wish is that there were more moments of it... like maybe we could have seen her when Makoto stopped her execution because that would have been at her lowest. But as it stands, I knew there was always a reason why I adored and LOVED Martina Electro as a character. I've always been attracted to stories of attack dog type characters growing past what they were and becoming something new.

Martina is wonderful because she was an honest-to-god shitty cop who got an earth-shattering awakening that reshaped her entire morality until she became someone who renounced her need for power and actually aided the society around her. Love to see it.

Not strictly important: I would also let her fucking kill me.

[twistednuns]

May 2019

Leah Rieck’s book Sag dem Abenteuer, ich komme - she started out in Munich and travelled the world on her motorcycle, alone. I loved how down-to-earth it was, it didn’t glorify the places she visited. Reading it gave me the final impulse to hand in the application for my sabbatical in three years. Now I just have to sign up for Spanish class at uni.

Being sick - good for losing Canada weight. And getting better really quickly, too! I was already prepared for a horrible flu but after one feverish, painful day I was as good as new! Strange magic.

Andre sending me a very old photo of himself, sitting in a 90s bedroom, shirtless, playing a red electric guitar. He has long-ish hair and looks up into the camera. He looks like a seductive young Kurt Cobain.

Reading Meike Winnemuth’s book about gardening. Another book which kinda gives me the desire to have my own garden. Well. For now I’m just sprucing up the balcony.

My new Dyno vinyl label maker. Exactly the right thing for someone with a passion for sorting, labeling and organising.

Eating ripe peaches and strawberries.

Wearing my cowboy boots from Montréal. I love making click clack sounds while walking.

More literature: Finally reading Hesse’s Siddhartha for the first time. / Bela B Felsenheimer’s debut novel. / A very pretty graphic novel I got in Québec: Anne… La Maison Aux Pignons Verts / And another feminist dystopia, one of my favourite genres: Christina Dalcher’s Vox.

An evening with Maxim and Martina at Flex. Playing pool with the computer scientist and his girlfriend from New Zealand. Needing help for the foosball match - fortunately the guy from Kairo was on the spot. Grasovka and Gauloises on a Monday night. Living a little, you know? / Related: getting better at pool even though I have to play with idiots #horribletinderdates

Finding that sticker of Grumpy Cat saying “Don’t be racist - hate everyone!”

This list here is list number 100 of my Things I Love series. Ha. I’ve been doing this for a really long time now.

Long days, short nights. Twilight. Riding my bike in the evening. The smell of lilac in the air.

Reading about multipotentialism; thinking about my passions, skills and interests. Maybe it’s time to expand my portfolio. Get myself out there. Take on a part-time job or find a new project.

The little bird using my balcony as a playground.

Lit Cities - Where do you want to travel to? Just pick the right book. This literary world map will help you choose.

Me, the Queen of Bad Dates, the Realm of Being Single and Sky-High Standards despite Insecurities Galore sometimes needs to hear something like this.

Making my own crisp bread for the first time. With sea salt, rosemary and pine nuts.

Avocado green and beetroot magenta next to each other on a sunflower seed bun. A great colour combination.

Virginia Woolf inventing the ODTAA (One-Damned-Thing- After-Another) Society.

Seeing a girl one morning from the tram window. She rode her bike downhill in the morning sun without holding on to the handles. She wore a light jacket and the wind pushed it back over her shoulders. She looked free.

I love finding partyblowers in men’s pockets. That’s why I sometimes put them there. I think it started with Hannes after watching the Rocky Horror Picture Show at the cinema. For my birthday, Manu got a green one for his leather jacket. I always instruct them to keep it there for me to find next time.

Drawing a stripper greeting card for Sarah because I didn’t think Leoni was able or organise a real one for her.

Waiting for Lexi in front of the water fountain at Prinzregentenplatz when I saw a bunch of balloons rising up in the sky in the sunshine. I hope someone made a wish. Or a little kid was crying, who knows.

Spending time with Lexi! Bun and litchi mojitos as Thao, ice-cream at Ballabeni. Watching the cats at Katzentempel from outside. Shopping at Edited, Words’ Worth and Mikado (where I ran into Dani who showed me his Harley… what a coincidence).

Also: somehow motorcycles are a recurring theme at the moment. I’d like to get a scooter or my motorcycle driver’s license.

I’m a big fan of sculptures with little legs.

“Everything about this aesthetic is working! Can I buy you a drink?” (Jonah) - one of the best pick-up lines ever used on me. Sadly - of course - by a weirdo toymaker with a bimbo fetish. But hey, he had a very nice voice.

The yellow cascade blossoms on the tree in front of my balcony.

Watching videos by a foster mum for rescue kittens.

My birthday! I treated myself to ramen and pistachio ice-cream at Viktualienmarkt in the afternoon. In the evening I met Barbara, Maike, Lena, Obi, Lexi, Yanic, Bibi, Manu and Frank at Keg. It was karaoke night so I sang the Pina Colada song and I Just Died in Your Arms Tonight by Cutting Crew. I made a fool of myself but that’s fine. Gin and tonic and having an awesome time with my friends helped me get over it. I even got super nice presents: a colour-changing umbrella from Bibi (whose eyes looked especially beautiful that day), a book about epic road trips and &otherstories earrings from Lexi and Yanic, a Rivers of London graphic novel from Barbara and Maike and Lena and Obi gave me a happy llama DIY kit (such fun!) and a voucher for a hike with alpakas and llamas. My mum gave me Avène Antirougeurs face cream and a plant holder. Sounds weird but both items had actually been on my wish list.

Frank and Manu’s bromance. They just kept talking about Quake, ignoring me completely. It’s fine. I did a good deed by getting those two together.

An afternoon at the cinema watching Detective Pikachu with Manu, Isi, Andi, Dani and Martin.

The power of imagination: I get a physical reaction when I imagine cutting my finger on the edge of a metal can.

Planning on making a collection of hand sculptures and prints with different materials and media.

Taking part in iraville’s little drawing challenge (#drawthisinyourstyle) - she posted an illustration (‘Matcha Girl’) and asked her followers to use it as an inspiration to draw the same motif in their own personal style.

Drawing more in general. Actually using the huge set of Polychromos coloured pencils I bought.

Wolfgang Herrndorf’s poem Das Elend und die Welt.

Motto week at school. Getting to wear your pyjamas to work is awesome.

Going to England with the students. There were some small incidents but all in all I had a very good time. As a matter of fact I’m one of those rare teachers who enjoy class trips. Everything is better than routine. So we stayed at a host family with a small zoo - they had three cats, their son brought another one on the first day, and in the garden we’d get visits from foxes, seagulls and the neighbours’ cat, too. Sara’s Iranian cuisine was amazing. So much better than anything we had in a restaurant that week. Her granddaughter Liana was quite a handful but adorable. I love it when children have a British accent. I had never been on the Dover-Calais ferry before and seen the chalk cliffs.

[niuxita21]

And since I’ve started blogging regularly about TV shows again after about a couple of years of finding my happy place in women’s football, I just need to be intense about the season 2 premiere of El Embarcadero for two seconds and then I’ll be fine.

I was legit terrified of watching this episode lmao because the s1 finale left me SHOOKETH and there were just so many ways to go from there but I was only going to be OK with a couple of them so for me there was a lot riding on how they chose to develop things after Alex’s shocking confession in the last few seconds of the finale and the new development of her possibly having realized her feelings for Verónica. My worst case scenario was a time jump of like a year or so to account for the passage of time in real life (maybe?) So IMAGINE my surprise and delight when the episode starts and it picks up right where they left off (even a few seconds earlier), like, I knew it was going to be a good episode when just a few seconds in and I already approved of the decisions being made.

The fact that we got a redo of the bed makeout scene but this time better shot and with NO ÓSCAR anywhere to be seen like ???? Did someone read my innermost thoughts and find out that I was a bit disappointed in the eclectic camera work that didn’t let me see shit and in Óscar being interspersed with Alex and Verónica kissing for the very first time in the finale? WHO SAID god is not real????

The confrontation post-confession went about exactly as I’d hoped/imagined it would with Verónica getting mad and kicking Alex out almost immediately without letting her explain. I did enjoy the glimpses we got of their fight before Alex left, with both of them getting super intense and in each other’s faces, made all the more delicious by the height difference. That said, I had to LOL at Alex’s “You came into my house and stole the love of my life, you can’t kick me out of your house!” bc LMAO gurl, I love you to pieces but whaaaa?? Lots to unpack here but bottom line, it’s OK, you did just makeout with a hot lady for the first time in your life, it’s understandable that you wouldn’t be thinking straight (ha!)

Verónica deciding that the best way to deal with her anger at being betrayed by “Martina” is to BURN ALL HER SHIT LMAO. That is a totally sane and healthy reaction to a friend breakup, shall we say, and not at all an indication of some deeper feelings there. Nope, not at all.

I loved that Alex said in therapy that she thought what happened to her with Verónica with respect to her inability to pull away from her was the same thing that happened to Óscar, because that’s what I’ve always thought. Like I can totally see why Óscar and Alex would be drawn to each other, they’re both hot, adorable, type-A nerds, so it also makes sense that they would be drawn to the same type of person who comes into their lives and puts everything completely upside down just by virtue of being like no one they’ve ever met before. Also, Alex saying she’s having trouble dealing with Verónica’s absence, nawwwww. This show is just committed to giving me everything I want and it’s only episode 1!!!

The scene between Verónica and Conrado was interesting on a couple of levels. 1) He finally showed his true colours as the typical man who appears to be a cool and understanding dude until something comes between him and a woman he has decided he wants and then the aggressive, possessive alpha-male jumps out. Bit disappointing ngl because I thought he was one of the good ones. And 2) Verónica’s “What do you want with [Alex]?” (roughly), just a few shades from being jealous, and “I’ll step away if I want to” made me think that she was legit gonna pursue something with Alex just to piss off Conrado, but thankfully that was not the case. I did like that it was a subtle continuation of the way she’d been tuning into the thing between Alex and Conrado in the last two episodes of season 1. I always thought it was the beginnings of jealousy because she was starting to develop feelings for Alex so we’ll see if I was right and she ever brings it up when they get together for real.

THE BATHTUB SCENE. Possibly my favourite moment between these two in the entire series so far, dethroning the hug at the beach in the season 1 finale. I mean, UGH, where do I even start. The way Alex looks down at Verónica naked in the bathtub with such tenderness and asks her if she’s OK. Her “I’m not leaving, I can’t be away from you” in response to Verónica kicking her out. The way you can see the wheels turning inside her head and weighing the options of doing what Verónica is ordering her to do or staying and continuing to fight to get her back, until the latter finally wins out and she straight up TAKES HER SHOES OFF and gets into the bathtub with her. Like, she doesn’t say a single word, but that’s her grand gesture right there and it does all the work for her because a few seconds later, Verónica breaks down and pulls her into the tightest softest hug and at this point I DON’T KNOW HOW I AM STILL ALIVE. Also, this shot:

Like what kind of epic love story shit is this??? And then:

How TIGHTLY Verónica is wrapped around Alex I can’t deal with any of it.

And then Verónica pulls Alex down with her and all of a sudden they’re CUDDLING IN THE BATHTUB WITH ALEX FULLY CLOTHED AND LAYING COMPLETELY ON TOP OF A VERY NAKED VERÓNICA BECAUSE OF HOW TINY SHE IS LIKE HOW IS THIS A REAL THING THAT I’M WITNESSING WITH MY OWN TWO EYES I CAN’T EVEN. And then Verónica apologizes to Alex for ruining her marriage and Alex quips that she never even found out and they both laugh and like, it’s amazing that they’re already at a place where they can joke about that like it’s nbd I’m just :))))

That said... it did feel like Verónica came around way too quickly. IDK it seems to me that Alex would have had a bit more explaining to do before Verónica felt like she was OK with forgiving her like, no offense to that tiny, possibly lesbian disaster, I mean, I love her, but what she did to Verónica was messed UP even if she WAS her husband’s mistress, and at the very least I feel like Alex needed to apologize for deceiving her like that. Maybe the key to all this is that mysterious message Alex said she left for Verónica but that we didn’t listen. Maybe she apologized and explained herself at length knowing Verónica probably wouldn’t let her do it in person? That makes sense to me. Hopefully we get to hear it in later episodes, given how timey-wimey the storytelling is on this show.

ALSO, Verónica calling her “Alejandra” for the first time. Ugh, I love this song. As a sidenote, I always headcanoned that, once Verónica found out who Alex really was, she would always call her by her full name and not by her nickname. It just seems to jive with what we know of her character so far. Let’s see if I’m right.

The whole sequence of Alex, Verónica, and Sol having a happy family afternoon riding the horse, playing tag on the beach, and having a tortilla de patata contest all set to that happy-go-lucky “Suspicious Mind” song is what serotonin is made of. My goodness. It’s impossible not to smile while watching it. And my biggest takeaway is Alex’s big ass SMILE:

She’s SO HAPPY. This little family that she conned her way into makes her so genuinely HAPPY and it melts my heart. 

Alex telling Verónica she thinks Óscar was murdered and then “If you think someone killed him, I’m gonna help you find whoever did it.” Like DO YOU KNOW how much I wanted these two to team up and try to figure out what really happened to Óscar together??? I just figured, if it ever happened, it would be like halfway through the season at the very least, because that’s how long I imagined it would take Verónica to forgive Alex for deceiving her, so to have it happen already? IS IT MY BIRTHDAY OR SOMETHING??? And just, like, the amount of TRUST she already has in Alex, like not 24 hours have passed since she found out who she really is but she’s already willing to follow whatever theories she has and assuming she’s right. It makes me so happy.

Alex not being able to sleep next to a topless Verónica because she’s so attracted to her? Brilliant, fantastic, amazing, showstopping, spectacular, *chef’s kiss*, etc.

That whole morning scene when Alex wakes up and starts freaking out because Sol is gonna be late for school, like, she’s already acting like such a MOM to her, I can’t handle it. But my favourite part was how she asks Verónica “Did you burn ALL my clothes?” with not an ounce of reproach in her voice, she just wants to know if there’s anything in that house that she can wear to her meeting to save time, and Verónica’s like “I can lend you something” and Alex, “Something appropriate for a meeting with architects?” and Verónica fake ponders, “Hmm... let me think... nope,” clearly pulling her leg. I just ADORE how, now that the jig is up and Alex is being herself with Verónica, this new dynamic is starting to take shape wherein Alex can be all type-A with Verónica and Verónica just teases her about it without Alex even getting mad, the same way she did with Óscar.

Verónica dropping in on Alex at her work to tell her about the tickets to Óscar’s car. OK 1) The way Alex SMILES when she sees Verónica was probably my second favourite moment of the episode. There this show goes again subverting my expectations. When I saw Verónica walking in, I thought we were in for their first disagreement because Alex would be embarrassed about having Verónica there, since she’s always been very zealous about keeping her life at the albufera and her life as Alex separate. But NOPE, not this show!

skdfhkjdhk tattoo that smile on my forehead like???? I mean I thought I had a pretty clear read on Alex’s character so far, but she’s just throwing me for a loop here, lol. I guess being in love really does that to people IDK. (Sidenote: how GORGEOUS is she??? She’s got that classically Spanish dark hair and intense dark eyes that just drive me crazy.)

The both of them just sitting around in Alex’s office doing some amateur detective work re: Óscar’s speeding tickets and the mysterious town where he seemed to be coming and going, casually being like, “I’ve never seen him do that” “Neither have I” like they’re talking about a mutual friend and not about, idk, the man they were both in love with (and who is now dead) is freaking WILD, man, but also EXACTLY what I’d been wanting to see at some point and I still can’t believe the show is giving it to me so soon. Lastly, Verónica saying, “We should go to [that town]. Together.” makes me laugh because the “together” was COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY lmao but hey, Vero, if it makes you feel good to constantly restate the fact that you and Alex are in this TOGETHER then who am I to criticize. These two, I swear.

The way Katia comes in and, instead of scrambling to find a logical explanation, Alex is just casually like, “Verónica, I’d like you to meet my best friend, Katia,” which, ngl, just raises a whole slew of questions lmao. Like, does this mean Katia already knows Alex came clean to Verónica? Or are we supposed to assume that that random introduction was all Katia needed to realize things had shifted between them? Hopefully we’ll find out later in a proper conversation. My favourite part, though, was Verónica’s “Katia, huh?”, like the last piece of the puzzle that was Alex’s lie finally clicked into place. I loved that Katia apologized for yelling at her when impersonating Alex and Verónica, in her classic Vero way, just brushed it off like it was nbd. I mean, we know how much Katia’s words affected her when she thought they came from Óscar’s wife, but now that she knows who his real wife is and that she would never actually feel that way about Verónica, it’s like the power those words had over her evaporated the same way that “Martina”’s persona did. IDK, I just loved that exchange.

LASTLY, when Alex and Verónica are at the mysterious town Óscar was going to and they find the house where he supposedly lived, and Alex says they need to call Conrado and Verónica tells her about him finding out about them and that he’s mad at her and Alex tells her he found out because she talked about it in therapy. First of all, I like how this sets up a future scene between Alex and Conrado where you KNOW he’s gonna try to slut-shame Verónica like, “I don’t know what she told you but she always does that to get people into bed with her” or something and it will backfire spectacularly on him with Alex no doubt defending her and perhaps even getting mad at him for treating Verónica like that. CANNOT WAIT. And secondly, the way Verónica LOOKS at Alex while saying “You went to therapy... to talk about how we kissed a couple of times?” I’m--

She’s just SO AMUSED bless her little heart. Again, I thought she’d get mad at Alex for divulging her intimacy like that, but I should probably know Verónica better by now. The fact that she doesn’t give a rat’s ass about what people think of her is what makes her such a compelling character.

Alex being like, “I went to therapy to talk about how I kissed my husband’s mistress, yeah”, basically like “What of it?”, and then ADMITTING SHE LIKED IT!!!!!!! What I loved, though, was the matter-of-fact way she says it. It wasn’t a grand, sweeping love declaration, nor was she expecting Verónica to reciprocate or respond to it in any way. She was just explaining why she went to therapy to talk about it. IDK I just found it so refreshing that she’s basically admitting to feeling more than friendship towards Verónica and it’s not weird or anything anymore because they’re way past that. Also, I liked getting confirmation that nothing happened beyond kissing. I strongly suspected it just from the way it was shot, but I’m glad I don’t have to wonder anymore. This also means I still have their first time having sex to look forward to. We just keep winning!!!

“Maybe you’re a lesbian.” “I hope so! At least I’d have ONE thing clear!” I’M SCREAMINGGGGGG. But also, I like how this implies that kissing Alex wasn’t something new to Verónica or something she lost any sleep over. Like she only talks about redefining oneself post-makeout in the second person, like Alex is the only one who needs to change the way she sees herself after realizing she enjoyed kissing another woman. Ever since she told “Martina” early in season 1 that she’d slept with a lot of “people,” I figured she was bisexual, so I’m taking this as confirmation just because I can.

ANYWAY, like I said, I needed to be intense about this episode. There was just SO MUCH to unpack and I don’t feel like I even put all my thoughts on here, but this is still quite enough, lol. TL;DR I was afraid the show would build on the reveals of the season 1 finale in a direction I wouldn’t like and that would ruin my enjoyment of this season (having Alex and Verónica take until at least episode 4 to become friends again and perhaps even later to start working together to solve Óscar’s murder, let alone start inching towards a romantic relationship or, worst case scenario, a time jump in which I’d miss the immediate confrontation between them and Alex trying to win Verónica back) but, instead, they gave me everything I wanted already in episode 1, including something I didn’t know I wanted, which is putting them in a place where they’re really close but still very much in the friend zone such that I didn’t miss the moment their relationship shifted into romantic territory and, best of all, I’ll still probably get to see a few moments of sexual tension (like that amazing scene with Alex being unable to sleep) until that finally happens.

UGH, THIS SHOW. Very, very few times have I been so satisfied with a single episode of television and the decisions made to resolve a cliffhanger. Usually, even when the writers give me what I want or my ship gets together, there’s still something I would have done differently or that the show missed and I didn’t get to see, but not here. I can’t think of a single thing that I would add or change because I was hoping I’d see it but it wasn’t shown. Like on the one hand, this is good because it means that I’m less stressed about the upcoming episodes and I’m content to just watch everything play out because I already got to see everything I wanted between these two in terms of a resolution to last season’s cliffhanger and there’s nothing I’m worried we won’t be shown. But, on the other hand, that just probably means it will all be downhill from here, LMAO. 

[twistednuns]

March 2017

Passer une semaine merveilleuse à Paris avec Frank! Wow, my first impulse was actually to start writing in French, this is how far I've already come in little more than a week of intense training... Which brings me to me first good thing this month, even before writing about the great things that happened in Paris:

Being extremely motivated to brush up my French! It was so much fun to notice how my language skills improved every day even though I only spent five days in Paris. On my last day, I bought one of the Harry Potter books in French (I figured reading a book I already know more or less by heart will make it less hard when I have to guess every other word). I read seven chapters on the train to Munich and have since scored thousands of experience points on Duolingo. Gosh, I even started filling a notebook with vocabulary and grammar rules. I wonder how long I can keep up this pace... But it's so amazing, I catch myself talking to myself in French (in my thoughts at least). Immersing myself in the language definitely made an impression on me.

Ok, so, Paris. The train ride was great because I started AND finished reading a whole book. / I was so happy whenever I managed to have a successful conversation in French. / I really liked Ombeline, especially roaming around her apartment (with more than 17 chairs in the living room alone). Going through all her books and bandes dessinées (she even had one by Margaux Motin!), making breakfast in her kitchen, opening some of the cupboards and marvelling at the sheer amount of stuff and back-ups she owns, looking at her souvenirs from Africa and the beautiful crescent moon mask. / The SOHN concert at La Maroquinerie (which was by chance only a few hundred metres away from Ombeline's flat). "I can feel it coming, we can never go back." / Finding a statue of a gorgeous bearded man in marble; surrounded by baby angels with severed heads. A man after my fancy. / Sitting in Sacré-Coeur, taking cover from the rain, having a profane conversation. / Taking a walk from Montmartre to Faubourg; a good hour of sunshine, glitter on the streets in Pigalle, noticing that gay Frenchmen have a very distinct style. Sharing a passion fruit éclair. Decadent bulky waste (a pink satin canapé). / Spending time at Centre Pompidou, rediscovering Twombly, Brancusi and Klee. / Sitting outside a café with a strong drink and a cigarette (I had to think about Franzi's idea of the ideal way to spend time in Paris - sitting around in cafés all day, wearing red lipstick and smoking way too much). / Watching the swing dancers at Balajo. / Le jardin des plantes! The palaeontology and geology museum were fantastic. I've always wanted to go there but somehow I never managed even though I've been to Paris three times before. / Sitting at the Seine, next to each other, taking in the scenery.

Minimalism input: reading Escape Everything by Robert Wringham in Ombelines overly full apartment made me consider doing something drastic with my life. Sell all my stuff, become a digital nomad. So many ideas!

Overhearing a little girl one afternoon addressing the red, white and blue balloons she had just gotten in a bakery: "Ja ich weiß, ihr Luftballons ihr wollt weg!"

I've basically stopped watching TV? What's going on? I only saw one movie in February, and that was at the cinema! Awesome! More time for books!

Buying books is so satisfying. I loved spending time in French book stores (Les Mots à la Bouche!), going through the used-book section at the Bouquinistes and Shakespeare and Company. I bought so many books during the last few weeks. It's gonna take the rest of the year to read all of them.

My colleague asked me whether I'd like to start a sustainability exchange programme with a school in South America! Exciting!

The Grossstadtgeflüster concert at Feierwerk was awesome. I even got a sticker with a street sign for Fickt-Euch-Allee (I kinda wanna put it over the real street sign here in my street).

Oat cookies with dark chocolate. Baking my favourite lemon cake with poppy seeds and blueberries.

A weird weekend - I neither left the house nor talked to anyone - but I was in the mood to clean all my windows! My productivity high is getting scary...

How sadly true this article on jealousy is. The first paragraph actually triggered me to shout out "ha" because I felt caught. Oh well. After all "you have to keep breaking your heart before it opens." (Rumi)

ALMOST booking a flight to Cancún over Christmas and New Year's Eve. It might still happen. So far I'm afraid I'm spending too much money as it is... we'll see how much unreason my bank account can take. But just imagining lying on a white, sandy beach on the first day of 2018 while Germany vanishes in a cloud of dust and smoke after the annual fireworks... nice thought.

Making poached eggs for the first time. You have to make a swirl with an egg whisk in a pot of vinegar water and crack the eggs while the water is still moving.

The nice feeling of the dust cover of Zeige deine Wunde by Rüdiger Sünner.

Talking to Inge on the tram.

Watching Wilde Maus at Rio Filmpalast. Pia Hierzegger is such an interesting actress and I just found out that she's been dating Josef Hader for years now! Ha. Best quote: "Bist du angrennt irgendwo?"

Drawing some figures for my sixth-graders and colouring them in Photoshop (I haven't done that in a while but it's so much fun). And in general - being more creative. Drawing a treasure map with black ink. Getting the watercolours out. Sitting down with my students to make clay and stone sculptures. It's so nice to create something, free from pressure.

A fantastic room tour.

The handsome dude from the French textbook publishing company. Can he come over more often, please?

Watching old Art Attack videos.

A very stormy morning. 6am, the sky still dark blue, the trees bending and bowing as black silhouettes against it. What an energetic start into the day.

Pressed flowers. I'm thinking about making my own, just like I used to as a kid.

This article: On drowning goats.

I just had a wonderful idea: I'd like to make a book for my friends. I'm not quite sure what should go inside but I was thinking of stories and memories, recipes, photographs and of course some of my drawings. I'd have so much fun layouting it and I'd also have a full round of really good Christmas presents. Projects! Whee!

It sounds counter-intuitive but: Running from a situation instead of suffering through it. I often try to do "the right/decent thing" to put a good face on the matter and sit it out when I'm actually dying on the inside. It felt good to say "no, not that shit again" and walk away.

An unexpected support squad at school (thanks, Selina, Osna, Katarina!)

Liberté, Egalité, Beyoncé

My tiny new portrait drawing class.

Successful adulting: taking care of boring insurance policies, contracts, applying for a visa, having my bike repaired, refilling my car's water tank. But I did all the things!!

Milchschnitte Himbeer and mango panna cotta.

Liebertext / exchanging daily mails with a stranger.

Getting the invitation for Franzi's and Ralf's wedding in the mail! I was so happy I was hardly even mad about all the confetti in the envelope, I mean, on my bathroom floor. And I was so relieved that my return flight from Helsinki is going to be on the day before; for I second I thought I wasn't going to make it.

"Komm mal her!" - "Aber ich hab dich gar nicht lieb." - "Ich dich aber trotzdem."

Sexy schmexy (I love saying this at the moment)

Bibiana Beglau as Mephisto in the Faust production at the Residenztheater.

Hitting the jackpot when opening a pint of ice-cream just to find a huge pool of liquid caramel right under the lid.

Seeing how creative some of my students are (I mean, hello, Frenchman, hunter, Santa Claus, rockstar and superhero minions made out of clay? Such great ideas!)

Little pink tulips with round heads and yellow edges. So cute.

Dinner with the Educational Lady Warriors. I mean, Franzi, Elsa and Martina. Finding out that Elsa is pregnant! She showed us her ultrasound picture and you can actually see a tiny human already, with the spine, brain hemispheres, the heart, the limbs... Fascinating.

Receiving a 50€ gift voucher for a book shop after completing a random survey on school questions. AND winning two theatre tickets for Liebesblind at the Pathos. Sweet.

Unsweetened almond milk. It tastes like marzipan!

I noticed that I really like the sinew over my right big toe. I don't have many body parts that aren't soft, which is why I appreciate this one sinew standing out.

I won two tickets to Liebesblind at Pathos and took Franzi with me. The location was pretty great, very Berlin-esque. Afterwards we had some drinks at her place, Ralf and a few of their friends were also there. A pretty nice evening!

My trusted old 2-minute-recipe: couscous with some feta and tomato puree.

I went to a drive-in cinema for the first time and I don't know why I'd never been before, it's AWESOME. You're in your cosy little box, get the audio via radio frequency (since my new car has a BOSE sound system the quality is excellent) AND you can talk throughout the movie!!

This incredible weather. Getting the first pistachio ice-cream of the year at my favourite ice-cream parlour in Schwabing. Seeing everyone sitting in the sun in front of the Glypthothek. And the blossoms on the trees. Munich is so nice in the sunshine.

Having pizza and ice-cream with Lexi, driving on the highway with open windows and extremely amusing German songs blasting (Schnipo Schranke, Von Wegen Lisbeth, Sookee). Drinking beer at the Bilderbuch concert, singing along, mock-arguments with Frank.

Hugging Doris just as long as she can bear it.

The other day my pupils told a colleague that she was beautiful, then they saw me and quickly added: "Oh, you are beautiful, too!" And then they group-hugged me. Adorable, bootlicking little gangsters...

How much fun I can have when I'm layouting tests and worksheets.