#i always think of how weird it is that people have unfinished/hidden fics in their drafts that readers will probs never see

[gardenoflupins]

Frediee is nice. Can we have lovermarks 🥺

LMAO is this a new tactic? Honestly I’m a little surprised at the amount of people that want to see more of Lovemarks.

I wrote it a year ago and let it rot in the drafts because I was sick of it (happens to everything I write which is why most of my fics dont make it to ao3) but it’s been refreshing to see it through everyone else’s eyes. I feel less critical about it and more willingly to work on it because of everyone’s engagement (I sometimes get repeat comments by people saying they’re still eagerly waiting and I can’t resissttt them ❤️‍🩹).

That was just a little ramble but yes! You can have more. I don’t have it in me to abandon it when people want to see more of it but it might take a while ❤️ it needs a bit of work

Thank you for showing your interest <3

[magpiemorality]

Oh! It’s Saturday! I can send in a prompt! So way back when Altruistic Skittles did the first of the nightmare series, with Remus, you reblogged and said you might want to write something based on the picture. Last I knew, she said that people can write fanfictions from the pictures, as long as they’re properly credited. If that’s still something you’d be interested in, I’d love to see it!

This is very big, somewhat in honour of Remus’ birthday today, a very long and dramatic origin for him.

Check out the amazing art that prompted this fic here :) and thanks to @altruistic-skittles​ for making it and allowing works based off it!! 

Also thanks to @omgsomeonesomewhereonearth for giving this a glance over for me on very short notice :)

Warnings: unreliable narrator, Anxiety is viewed as a bad guy, Remus isn’t particularly friendly, long post.

AO3

***

Roman had been feeling off for a while. He was far from the only one; puberty was tough on every aspect of Thomas, including Logan who had been stretched to his limits trying to keep up with all the demands of an average American high school life. But with Anxiety suddenly in the picture things were even more complicated. Who was he? Where had he come from? And why wouldn’t he leave?

In all honesty Roman hadn’t actually known there were other sides. He’d sort of, maybe naively, assumed that the three of them were the sum of Thomas’ parts, and that they covered everything Thomas would ever need. Sort of like Inside Out, which had in no way at all influenced their existence; they were the pilots who tended to the world inside Thomas’ busy head, just… minus the less good parts. Maybe Thomas didn’t need avatars for those things; maybe he didn’t value them that way, or maybe he just didn’t view them as part of himself?

It was an unfinished theory, but Roman mostly left those sorts of things to Logan, and Logan was too busy for much introspection these days. Which was why Anxiety had gone unchecked for so long.

Sometimes it felt like only Roman was the target of his attacks. Logan faltered, sure, but he was stubborn as all hell when it came to his routines and priorities and Anxiety hadn’t managed to shake them too much just yet. Logan was too established in Thomas’ head to allow wiggle room for anxious thoughts to disrupt his work. Patton also seemed to get away with coexisting with the guy; they fed off each other, or perhaps Anxiety had seen Patton’s power and figured it was easier to work with him than against him, turning good feelings to worry and guilt.

Okay so maybe Patton wasn’t unaffected, but he was so good at putting on a brave face that Anxiety had evidently seen fit to back off out of pure pity, and that left Roman. 

Roman, Roman, Roman, trying his best to stay afloat on the sea of schoolwork and stress, to throw creativity into Thomas’ days so his smile wouldn’t fade. Until stupid, miserable, Despicable He, came along and took it upon himself to thwart Roman’s noble goal.

Their fights were spectacular, unfortunately often feeding into the influence Anxiety had clawed for himself over Thomas and leaving him feeling worse than before Roman had begun the battle. Not that Roman ever started things! He just kept trying to do his work, to do his best, and then Anxiety would show up and bam! Thomas’ hand would falter when writing his cathartic fanfiction, or his mind would blank as he searched for the lines to his latest monologue, or his voice would wobble and break on the notes of a song.

So things were weird, and that wasn’t all.

All it took in the end were a few cutting remarks from Anxiety that didn’t make any sense, and Roman was lost to that edge of paranoia, forever wondering what he meant. A jibe about Thomas not being a perfect person; a sneer laughing at how none of them had even known Anxiety existed before he’d appeared; a scoff that came with the bold assertion that just pretending you weren’t like that didn’t mean you actually weren’t. He seemed to reference someone else sometimes, with a vicious sort of victory that was at least in part tainted with misery, someone who- if Roman was interpreting the clues right- Thomas didn’t even know worked for him, who Anxiety had escaped from. 

And then there was the matter of the tower.

~

Roman stared out of the bedroom window. It was his bedroom, his own copy of Thomas’, and if he focused hard enough he could see the shimmering after-images of the original, with Thomas’ homework on the desk, his clothes on the floor, his posters not quite matching up to Roman’s. He wasn’t in his room like Roman was, downstairs at dinner with the family, and not thinking too hard with his creativity. It left Roman free to do what he so often did these days; stare out of the window. 

Spread out below him was the familiar, comforting sight of the backyard, with its play area and the patio and the grass, the treehouse in the far right corner looking shabbier than ever from its lack of use. Thomas’ dad had been talking of taking it down soon now the kids were too old to use it, but both Patton and Roman- and in fact Anxiety in a rare display of unity- had dug their heels in as Thomas instinctively balked at the prospect of losing just another tie to his childhood. Patton had discovered nostalgia recently and Anxiety had discovered how much Roman feared the term ‘growing up’ and the treehouse was just a big old symbol for all of them to cling to. A beacon of bad things; a final point of no return. 

Roman hadn’t been inside in years, in all honesty, but curiously Thomas had, and more than once. Whatever occurred in there Roman wasn’t sure, but he felt a sense of… something faintly off whenever he looked at the treehouse, that hadn’t entirely started after he’d stopped going inside. This time was no different, and he wondered what the slight churn in Thomas’ gut meant, now that Roman had inadvertently bent his thoughts in the direction of the bottom right corner of the garden. Why picking at the faint memories of the interior of that shadowy wooden structure made their creator push his food around the plate and focus extra hard on talking about his classes, shutting Roman out soundly. 

The treehouse was still there, still dark and foreboding and strange. Roman’s eyes started to water slightly, warping the image, until it flickered ever so quickly.

 He gasped, shoving his whole body forwards, pressing his nose to the glass as it fogged around him with his quick breaths, trying to see it again. 

It remained stubbornly as it always had been, leaving Roman to wonder if he’d imagined the flash of dark, crumbling tower that had blinked into and out of existence. 

But he hadn’t, because as he lay in bed that night, doodling ideas into his notebook while Thomas tried to fall asleep, the shadows outside his window lengthened and the light that should have fallen on his curtains was slowly, steadily blocked out. The darkness felt cool, and thrilling in the way watching a horror movie when you weren’t supposed to felt thrilling, with that edge of risk to it that got your heartbeat going and made your palms clammy. Roman could feel the moment Anxiety noticed it as well, because Thomas’ brain whirred back awake in an instant, the tossing and turning that disrupted him more and more often these teenage nights starting up yet again. Logan began gamely battling to get Thomas to continue on to sleep, Logic coming up against Anxiety for once, but Roman… 

Roman got out of bed, creeping out of his room and down the hall, sneaking carefully down the stairs one by one so Logan wouldn’t notice and stop fighting with Anxiety. The tiled floor was cool under his bare feet as he crossed it to the back door, sliding it open with a soft whoosh of the well-used mechanism. 

The tower awaited him, taller than the treehouse had ever been and far more foreboding. It was made of dark, black brick, slimy and badly worn, surrounded by thorns and with no discernible entrance. A real Rapunzel tower, straight from the Grimm brothers themselves. 

A fairy-tale come to life. And Thomas hadn’t imagined Roman in the image of a dashing Disney prince for nothing; so he started forwards, heedless of his lack of shoes or weapons or anything. He had his curiosity and that was a thousand times more powerful in that moment than anything else. He wanted to know, and whatever thing (maybe a monster? Roman had only vague theories but he was leaning towards trapped monster) was imprisoned within; it felt close to escape. 

Were he Logan in that moment, Roman would theorise that the tower held some kind of dark aspect of Thomas that he’d hidden from himself, and that in the darkness before sleep it was hardest to maintain the lie, confronted with the harsh truth of oneself. But Roman wasn’t Logan, and he didn’t think too deeply beyond thing bad- must know more. 

He got through the thorns with relative ease, considering how large and deadly they looked from across the garden. All it took was a stick from the pile they kept for a bug hotel, a brief flash of inspiration turning it to a shining sharp sword that sliced neatly through each thick tendril until they started to wither away from him as he approached and revealed a door with no lock nor handle, carved into the base of the tower. 

Curiosity won again as Roman kicked it in, crumbling the ancient wood. He gasped, coughing as a thick gust of stale air wheezed out. It left Roman’s stomach twisting with nausea, but the need to be the prince and climb the tower was too strong to be deterred. Inside the house Anxiety upped the ante and Logan turned too late towards his own window, missing seeing Creativity take a step forwards and disappear into the treehouse. 

~

It was dark inside, that was the first thing Roman noticed. It was obviously going to be dark, a tower with no windows, but the darkness felt more than that. It felt like it hid an endless number of bad things waiting to come forwards, to pounce at any moment. The walls were horribly slimy when Roman used them to find the winding staircase, and the smell… Better not to mention it at all. 

Suddenly, the sound of whispered movement from above. 

“Hello?” Roman called softly, hoping he’d imagined it. Nothing replied, but the darkness felt closer, and he hurried upwards with the sword ready. “Anyone there?”

A pair of yellow eyes watched, waiting, from below, but Roman never looked down, intent on reaching his goal. He didn’t see the way the door was repairing itself, or how the thorns had regrown. His only thoughts were for the top of the tower and what lay in wait. 

There was the tiniest crack of light when he got up at long last, feet sore and eyes dry from straining to see something. It was a sliver from under a door, faint silver light, the only hint there was a door there at all until he felt it under his fingertips. 

It didn’t budge when he touched it, and once again there was no sign of a handle. Roman kicked it with a frustrated sigh, only to freeze totally still when the whisper of movement came again, -only this time, closer and clearer- it sounded a little like rusted metal, sliding against itself. 

The eyes down below, having followed the prince’s progress, narrowed in thought, but before they could make a decision Logic gained the upper hand over Anxiety back in the house and for a brief, shining moment, the tower was lit up bright and the door clicked open. 

Roman threw himself in before it could close again, and just in time too, because the light faded not a moment later, the door sealing itself up again. How he was going to get out, he wasn’t sure. But that was a problem for later- the fairy-tale dictated he had reached his goal. This was the end of the story. 

So what was his prize? 

There was a shape, in the room. A figure, about his own size, sat facing the window. Roman blinked hard to clear the spots that danced over his vision in the wake of the sudden flash of light, and the figure came slowly into view in the murk. A boy, with poufy sleeves and an outfit to match the setting, staring out of the window back towards the house. Back towards Thomas, back towards where Roman had been staring out from. The boy yawned, stretching his arms up and it was then that Roman noticed the chains. 

He was chained to the floor. Was this the monster at the top of the tower? Or the… dude in distress?!

This wasn't actually a fairy-tale, so the former seemed exponentially more likely, and Roman gulped as fear took root. 

“I know, I know, come to shut me up again. I just wanted a bit of fun, D-“ 

The boy stopped, frozen as still as Roman’s heart as it skipped a beat. Two identical faces, two sets of identical eyes, stared in horror and dawning, dim comprehension at each other. 

“You’re Roman!” The other boy shrieked, loud enough to make Roman flinch back. It stopped the grin on the chained boy’s face in its tracks, and he tilted his head, eyes turning cold and calculating in a heartbeat. 

“Who are you?” Roman squeaked, barely able to get his voice to work. “Why are you locked up? Are you evil? Does Thomas have…” his voice fell to a whisper. “A Dark side?”

The boy cackled, a joyful sound that shouldn’t have been as unsettling as it was. The clanking of the chains as he doubled over only heightened the feeling that something was wrong, and Roman screamed when the boy darted forwards suddenly. 

He was yanked back by the chains, snapping his jaw in Roman’s face with a wild snarl and snorting with amusement when Roman’s back hit the far wall, sword out and shaking in his unsteady grip. “A dark side? Everyone’s got a dark side, Prince Perfect. If you think you don’t, you’re just not looking hard enough." 

"Thomas is good!" 

"Thomas is real,” the boy purred, moving back to sit at the window again, gazing back towards the house. The distant sensation of Logic and Anxiety fighting for the upper hand grew when Patton joined, his constant underlying guilt swelling support for their anxious antagonist. The chained boy laughed, fingers tapping against his face too quick for Roman to even see, lips moving soundlessly on words Roman definitely didn’t want to hear. “Have you come to defeat me, Roman? No, you didn’t even know I was here, did you. Locked in my tower, kept from my one true calling. It’s for my own good, you know? D- the dragon that guards me says so. It’s for everyone’s good that I don’t get out, most of all Thomas’.” The name felt reverent the way the boy said it, softly and sweetly, like calling the name of a deity. It made Roman wince. “It’s only right that a villain should be kept away.”

“Who are you?" 

"I’m you, but stronger,” the boy retorted, breaking into cackles. “I’m you but scarier. That’s what they thought, anyway. I think I’m just something else. I think I’m bad news. I think Thomas is bad news…" 

Roman wouldn’t stand for that. He held his sword out more confidently, raising his chin. "Thomas is a great guy! He’s the best! He’s full of good things and light and-”

“And darkness and wondering, wandering thoughts and impulses, just like anyone. Even you. You would kill me if you thought you should, if you thought it was your Disney story, wouldn’t you. Without hesitation, but Roman! Killing is wrong!”

“Not in Disney!" 

”Even in Disney!“

A howl of rage echoed around the tower, along with the sound of metal on stone as Roman brought the sword down on the window ledge beside the boy’s hands. The chained boy didn’t flinch, just beaming victoriously at Roman, cackling his disquieting cackle. 

"Who are you really?! Tell me!" 

The boy opened his mouth to speak, a hunger in his eyes that Roman didn’t understand, but the tower shuddered. His eyes darted to the door and Roman’s couldn’t help but follow. "Oh dear, Roman. You shouldn’t have come here. Curiosity killed the cat, you know, and the witch is on his way to toss you out of the tower…”

“I thought you said it was a dragon?”

“Dragon, witch, there was a time when there wasn’t any difference to you. Maybe you’re learning some nuance now though. That’s gotta be rough, buddy, you’re practically made from simplicity.”

Roman narrowed his eyes at the insult, and the tower shuddered again. The boy picked up his cackling again, louder and louder as the shuddering turned to heavy footsteps approaching up the stairs. And Roman wondered, if this was the monster that guarded this boy, what did that make the boy?

“He’s here.”

The door burst open, a hazy shape flying in and grabbing Roman, what felt like giant claws snatching him up and carrying him out of the tower, dropping him hard onto the lawn before it whirled back around and vanished back into the… treehouse? 

The tower was gone. The treehouse looked like it always had, dark and grim, but it was definitely just the same treehouse as ever. 

He fell back, sprawling on the grass as his limbs turned to jelly from the residual adrenaline, while inside Anxiety let up at last and Logan won the battle for the night. Thomas slipped uneasily into dreams.

The tug of unconsciousness grew heavy, dragging on Roman’s very being now his creator had finally fallen asleep. He just about managed to drag himself inside to bed before succumbing at last, glad to leave the whole strange night behind him. 

-

Masterlist | Buymeacoffee

[mercifuldeaths]

Vertigo: Chapter 2: Jacked Up

Vertigo: Chapter 2

Jacked Up

This fic is in progress.

Jim Mason x Reader

Warnings for this chapter: Graphic descriptions of drug use.

Summary: Jim’s very good at hiding his vices, except, that is, with Medina.

Notes: More exposition. I’m sorry guys but the drama is worth the wait. This is Jim’s story-Y/N is a component, but this is a story about Jim’s journey. Thank you all so much for the positive responses from Ch 1! 

Word Count: 2.6k

Jim would see Y/N at the beach pretty regularly, not that he was looking for her. He couldn’t help that his room had a perfect view of the bay and whenever Medina was going for dawn patrol with her he would have his coffee outside, waiting for Sandy to be awakened by the other’s starting their day in the waves.

It seemed that Medina had finally had a friend, which made him exceedingly happy. Jim recalled the nights Medina would slip into his room and lay on the unmade bed asking why nobody liked her. He didn’t have an answer for her, or rather he did, but didn’t have the heart to tell her.

He couldn’t help but constantly be reminded of how much stronger she was. Of course, she was heartbroken that she didn’t have friends, but she did have the strength to not change herself for others’ approval. Jim couldn’t say the same for himself.

Coming in from his coffee- she wasn’t out there that day- he picked up his backpack and jacket.

“‘Dina,” he whispered, ear pressed to her door. He almost fell over when the door was ripped away from his face.

“Hey, we’re running late, let’s go,” she responded. She managed to smack him with her backpack as they snuck out the door, avoiding Sandy.It was a miracle that she even let him go to his classes.

The pair hopped into Jim’s car, a new Nissan SUV from Phil. A graduation gift his father had called it but Jim knew what it really was. It was a “Sorry we’ve been shitty parents and let you overdose, but here’s a material item that’ll make up for it” gift. Medina got a smaller Volkswagen beetle that she absolutely adored.

It had been three and a half years since his overdose. It really wasn’t even that bad, he thought. He had passed out at home, Sandy overreacted and he spent a night in the hospital. Then Phil proceeded to tell him that they wouldn’t be going to Paris and that he’ll do better.

Admittedly, it had been slightly better. With Sandy back on her meds she wasn’t as prone to mood swings and temper tantrums meaning Jim had slightly more freedom. It didn’t allow him to escape his responsibilities as ‘man of the house’ but things were almost manageable. Almost.

After everything, he had to be more careful. Withdrawal had been a nightmare but when his mind cleared he found that the memory was fuzzy. Turning back to booze, then weed, then pills, then coke, then everything at once, had been an easy decision. This time, though, he needed to be careful.

A few weeks into sobriety, his mother would inevitably forget about Jim’s problems, replacing herself as the center of attention in her mind, so hiding it from her had been a joke. “Oh, I’m just tired, mom. Long day at school,” he’d say as his eyes fluttered shut, laying on the couch with a comfortable blanket of haze clouding his thoughts. She ate that shit up.

His father was even easier. He had still moved out, but his relationship with Ava had ended a while back, now seeing some other redhead. He was never around, not that Jim wanted to see him anyway. But with him being a doctor, he had to make sure he was sober around the man. He’d recognize all the signs, especially knowing Jim was a user.

Medina. She was...complex. He had tried to hide it from her, he really did. She found out almost immediately and hadn’t said anything but he could see the pain in her eyes. The only response she gave was a “Be careful with that shit, Jim. You don’t know what you’re playing with,” bitten out on his way back to his room from the bathroom where he had just taken an oxy. All the warning he needed was written on her face every time she looked at him. He tried to ignore it, for his own sake.

It’s because of this that when she said, “Is it getting bad again? Please tell me,” while biting into an egg McMuffin on their way to campus that morning Jim almost crashed his shiny new car. She had begged to get breakfast on the way and he could never say no to his sister.

“What are you talking about, Medina?” he rolled down the window and looked out the windshield pretending to focus on the traffic in front of him.

“I know what you’re doing. I’m not stupid. But just tell me if it’s that bad again,” she tried to seem casual, sipping her iced coffee but it sounded a little too rehearsed.

“I’m fine. You don’t need to worry,” his teeth grit together. Turning into the parking lot of their university

“‘Cause I know when mom gets weird you get weird. I don’t think she’s taking her medicine again- since dad’s new girlfriend,” she hesitated not knowing what reaction Jim would have.

His fist slammed against the steering wheel, making Medina jump, spilling coffee on her corduroys. “I’m not ‘getting weird’ or whatever, okay?” he yelled. “Yeah, mom’s fucking crazy again, it’s whatever.” He pulled into a parking space a little too quickly and the car lurched.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that,” her voice was smaller than she wanted it to be.

Jim’s jaw was still tense, teeth clenched. He took a deep breath through his nose and rolled his eyes back. “I know you didn’t. I’m sorry for yelling,” he looked over to her and stuck his tongue out a little, the way that usually made her laugh.

She wasn’t laughing. “So it’s gonna be like that, then,” he leaned over and poked her in the ribs, right in the spot that tickled most.

“Jim, stop!” she shrieked, attempting to get away from his long arms. Her laughter bounced in the car. They both smiled.

“Now, go. I know you have ‘Adult Coloring’ or some bullshit,” he loved to make fun of her customized major, full of classes she was taking to one day do what she wanted most, travel and surf. It was a lot of photography, journalism, and some random classes for credits.

“It’s ‘portraiture’, I’ll have you know,” she called over he shoulder before closing the door. Through the open window, she smirked, “Have fun with your blocks or whatever you do.”

He let out a groan that turned into a laugh, “It was once!” he shouted to her back, walking to campus’ central. He had been trying to figure out the flow and perception of this one project he was working on, so yeah he brought out some Legos to visualize it. That’s architecture for you.

What she’ll never mention is that she distracted him and then proceed to spend the entire night on the living room floor trying to one-up each other's towers. Jim using what he had learned from four years of design and structural classes while Medina relied on ‘just staking them up until they fall.’ Her’s was taller by two blocks and she will never let it go.

Grabbing his backpack he decided to pull the small baggie of pills out and place them in an empty plastic cup, hidden under the seat. Out of sight, out of mind. He was almost off his last bender and held a small glimmer of hope that this would be the last time. The back of his mind was already itching for another fix, reminding him to be even more careful around Medina.

Planning for a long day in the library, still trying to find a topic for his senior thesis, he grabbed Medina’s unfinished iced coffee and headed into the beating sun with a brave face painted on.

--

No. No. No. He coughed up more bile, spilling from his throat into the toilet in front of him. It was disgusting, he knew, but he needed to rest his head on the seat of it, cool porcelain taming the heat that coursed through him. He dry heaved this time, causing the head-splitting migraine to reappear.

“Jim?” his mother knocked on the bathroom door. “Jimmy, are you okay?” The handle jiggled but it was locked.

“I’m fine, mom,” he breathed through his nose, trying to stare straight ahead to stop the room from spinning.

“I can hear you in there. Are you sick, honey?”

“Food poisoning. I’m fine.” Short words. Short sentences. The sound of his own voice making him want to smash his head on the tile, hopefully blacking out.

“Let me in,” she demanded. The thought of her being around him made him retch again, this time probably for the last time as there was nothing left to vomit up. But, from experience, he knew to sometimes just go along with Sandy rather than fighting. Especially when he was feeling like this, he had no fight left in him.

He crawled over to the door and managed to unlock it, Sandy not missing a beat and plowing into the room. “Jim!” She kneeled next to him and immediately put her hand over his sweaty forehead. Admittedly, her cool hand felt nice.

“It’s just food poisoning, mom. I’m fine,” he whispered and leaned into her- an instinct leftover from childhood. “Just need to sleep.” Chills wracked his body but sweat was clinging to every pore, the dark circles under his eyes almost red. His irises still shined a brilliant blue.

Sandy put her arm around him and helped to bring him to his feet. They shuffled into his room, his mother rambling about how California sushi can’t be trusted because so many of the people eat it, its mass produced.

Jim wished she would shut the fuck up.

He didn’t fully recognize how, but he was laying in his bed, tee shirt removed, blankets pushed off the mattress. In the fetal position, he slowly rocked himself willing the nausea away. He nearly lept out of his skin when Medina suddenly appeared, replacing Sandy.

“He likes to be alone when he’s sick,” Medina tried to reason to their mother, recalling when they were kids how Jim would always shy away from attention when he was sick, preferring to suffer in silence.

“He doesn’t like to be alone, he likes to be with you,” their mom spit out and turned on her heel, leaving Medina in the doorway holding a glass of water.

She made her way closer Jim, placing the glass on the nightstand. Perching on the side of the bed, she ran a hand through his sweat soaked hair, grimacing a little. He sighed under her touch and closed his eyes again.

“Thank you,” she whispered, mindful of his migraine. His eye cracked open and managed to convey his confusion. “I know what this is.”

“It’s food poisoning, that’s what it is. It’s that bullshit sushi we stopped for. Thanks for that,” he scoffed. She knew he didn’t mean any of it, that he was hurting. She could see his muscles twitch under his thin skin. They reminded her of springs, coiled and ready. His eyes screwed shut again and he nuzzled into her thigh. She could hear the small cries he was trying to hold back.

“We had the same thing for lunch, Jim. We split it,” she observed, letting him know his jig was up. She felt his head shake.

“Okay, then. It’s the stomach flu. Same thing, Jesus. Let it go,” he attempted to growl out but the intent wasn’t there. She held out the glass of water she had brought in and he was never more grateful for their twin telepathy ‘thing’. He managed to prop himself up and take a few slow sips. “Thank you,” he mumbled and handed the glass back to his sister, relishing the cool that washed down his throat.

Laying on his back he tried to stare ahead again, this time at the blank ceiling above him. He briefly thought about going outside to look up at the sky, but remembered that any sort of movement was practically impossible at the moment. His body ached as he had just run a marathon. Joints tight, frozen in place, he continued to lay on his back trying to regulate his breathing. 5 seconds in, 5 seconds out. He counted.

Medina continued to run her cool hands over his head and face. It only felt good because it was her. His other half, a strange extension of himself. Or probably he was the extension-Medina was already her own person. She didn’t need him anymore. His thoughts made him start rocking again, seeking any sort of primal comfort.

As if on cue, he felt the bed shift and she started to leave. Before she could, he managed to grab her wrist. “Don’t.” Only his lips moved. “Please.”

“I’ll be right back. I’m just getting more water,” she went to pull the blankets over him as the had shivers started despite his constant sweating. He nodded, content with her answer.

He thought that maybe he had finally started to drift off to sleep but was awakened by yelling. Sandy. At Medina, of course. Their shouts were muffled by the door and the fact that he couldn’t really think straight helped a bit, but his head still throbbed.

Sandy was going off about how Medina was always so judgemental towards her. Medina was snapping back with questions of why she wasn’t the ‘favorite’ twin. Sandy didn’t bother trying to hide it and plainly stated that she liked Jim better because he cared for her. Loved her. Medina started ranting about how this was just like last time. Last time, when things were Not Good. When Jim, the favorite, was Not Good. She suggested that maybe Sandy wasn’t that great of a mother if she didn’t love one of her children and couldn’t even manage to keep the one she liked from spiraling, practically killing himself.

Jim ground his teeth willing them to stop.

“This isn’t like last time for god’s sake,” Sandy screeched. “And it wasn’t my fault. Jim’s fine. Just like he was last time. It was a stupid mistake, once. He hasn’t touched that shit since, I’ll have you know,” she huffed. “Don’t make things worse than they are.”

Medina wasn’t about to out Jim. She was just trying to drop subtle enough hints that maybe Sandy would get the picture that things weren’t all that great.

Medina and Jim knew what was really going on in the other room. He was trying to detox from everything he had been taking in for the past few weeks. The two of them knew, and that’s the only thing that mattered.

Jim continued to hear them screaming from one thing to another. It was Sandy treating Jim like a husband, then it was how Phil was a bad father, then it was school, then Jim, then back to Phil, then Medina’s apathy, then back to Jim.

It always went back to Jim.

In a further attempt to block it out he rolled onto his side to his body’s dismay. Everything screamed in protest. When he opened his eyes he was greeted with the almost empty glass of water resting on the nightstand. His eyes narrowed in on the draw. Oh shit. Oh fuck.

To his horror and delight, he remembered the two small tablets he had pushed in the back of the drawer. For emergencies only, he told himself when he had placed them there. They went completely forgotten for so long he couldn’t even properly remember what they were. As if a puppet on a string, he propped himself up and opened the drawer, feeling the contents with long fingers. He felt the thin plastic and pulled the baggie out.

Directly depositing both of the pills on the back of his tongue, he used the last sip of water his sister had brought to swallow them. Shortly thereafter, he finally fell asleep.

Tags: @langdonsdemon @coloursunlimited @thecinderellaposts @michael-langdon-appreciation @langdonalien @tarkofetis @stupidocupido @katiekitty261

Special thanks to some ultimate babes: @michael-langdon-appreciation @thecinderellaposts @katiekitty261 You are all so amazing and keep me fed with only the best Jim content. Thank you <3 

[johnsspacesuittight]

A lil unfinished SAF fic

Hi Spies Are Forever fandom, here’s a little Curt x Owen fic I never really finished, but I kind of like it so I thought I may as well share what I have

__________

Agents Carvour and Mega

Banquet for the American Republican Party

Manhattan, New York 1954

Curt glared at Cynthia annoyed as her assistant came by with his suit hanging it on the door inside his hotel room. "Why do I even have to be here? I have more important things to do than spend my evening dancing and parading around here." He said pulling back a few strands of dark hair with his free hand. The other was hand-cuffed to the heater on the wall beside him.

"MI6 will be there tonight Mega, and they will expect my best agent to be there. Especially since they are bringing that bastard Owen Carvour." Cynthia said hinting for her assistant, Susan, to take the suit over to Curt. "Besides, there is a lot of important people there tonight, you never know when you might need a good agent. So behave, will you Mega?" She commanded rather than asked giving him a glare.

Rolling his eyes Curt gestured to the handcuffs that tied him up and with an annoyed groan Cynthia ordered Susan to take it off him. Rubbing his wrist with an annoyed expression Curt accepted the suit Susan was handing him. "Now if you'll leave me alone to get dressed." Curt suggested beginning to shove the two out of his hotel room.

"If you dare even think of climbing out the window Curt I swear-" Cynthia didn't even get to finish her sentence before he had slammed the door in her face and locked it behind them. Knowing he was well alone Curt pulled the t-shirt he was wearing over his head and easily exchanged it for the white dress shirt belonging to the suit Cynthia had got him.

The banquet was starting in an hour and Cynthia had just managed to drag him down there threatening to fire him if he didn't come. When he had then still refused to join her for the banquet she had locked him to the heater to stop him from escaping and taken his own gun, to which Curt had finally given in. Figuring it wasn't worth loosing his life over a boring banquet, although he might just die of boredom from it anyway.

Parties like that really wasn't Curt's favourite thing in the world. He was way too impatient to manage just wandering around and talking to people that you actually hated but had to pretend that you liked because it could cause a civil war or even a world war if you didn't. Curt preferred dangerous situations that gave him an adrenaline rush, which was why he was an agent for the government in the first place.

Only about fifteen minutes later Curt was all dressed up in the suit which consisted of a black bow tie, a white jacket and his usual black shoes that Barb had given him three months back. Curt had only worked for the American secret service for two years, but had quickly become their best agent, a grand scale professional who could compete for the title of the world's greatest spy. One of the only few standing in the way of that was MI6's Owen Carvour. Whom Curt had yet not met, he had only heard the rumours.

With his hair as styled as the rest of him and another quick glance in the mirror Curt decided he looked good enough and opened the door to walk out and down to the ground floor where the ballroom was, and the banquet was to be held. If it hadn't been for his quick reflexes Curt would have walked straight into the tiny frame just about to knock on his door. Curt stopped in his tracks.

"Barb!" He said surprised at seeing the younger woman all dressed up like this. She was wearing a long ball gown in blue, and her usually terrible blonde haircut was pulled back into a slightly less terrible hairstyle. "You look nice." He complimented, even surprised himself that those words came out his mouth while talking to her.

Her cheeks flushed a deep red and Curt cursed on the inside knowing complimenting her wasn't going to help. "Curt, I -we were looking for you." She stuttered slightly, smiling shyly. "You look nice too." She then added, realising she hadn't given a response to his compliment.

"Thanks Barb, you ready to head down?" He then asked and she nodded, doing her best to keep up with him as he begun walking down the hall. She was quite a small woman and it wasn't weird that she had trouble keeping up with him. They reached the end of the hall in a minute and took the elevator down to the ground floor from there.

Entering the ground floor of the building was a mess. People were everywhere, most of them more important than Curt would ever be. Leaders of governments, agencies and parties, people that could in fact end up creating a world war if they got of on the wrong foot. Both Curt and Barb discovered Cynthia at the same time, and with a much lesser tempo then a few minutes before, they headed over to her.

"Ah Agent Mega, Agent Lavernor, welcome. Barbara I want you to meet someone, this is Aron Marco who works for NASA." And as Barb was thrust into an excited conversation with the man with glasses Curt headed away from the scene. He gazed around, trying to find the bar but before he had the chance a voice behind him spoke. "Looking for the bar as well?" The voice carried a strong British accent and an obvious charm to it, and as Curt turned around, coming face to face with the man who had spoken he understood why. With dark slicked back hair and a face that seemed to carry a constant side smirk the man was just of Curt's taste. Dark mysterious eyes that he could already tell held much history. He was taller than Curt and carrying his dark grey suit with great elegance.

The man's smile widened just a little as their gaze's met, maybe almost in recognition. "Ahh, amusing that I was to just bump into someone like you." He said, then offering Curt his hand. "I am Owen Carvour, also known as your greatest competition Mr. Mega." He smirked charmingly as Curt took his hand and shook it. The two paused for a moment their gazes reading into each other, and Curt almost forgot that his hand was still gripping into the others. In a swift movement he let the other's hand fall and turned his gaze somewhere else, pretending to still be looking for the bar.

Not really meaning to Curt discovered the bar and met eyes with Owen for a second nodding to the bar behind him. Owen smirked turning around to see it for himself then he looked back at Curt and offered him his hand again. For a moment Curt hesitated fearing that someone in the room might notice, but upon seeing that everyone there seemed quite busy with their own things he laid his own hand into the others.

Owen led him across the room to the bar, with their hands well hidden between them. Owen sat down at the bar first, catching the attention of the bartender. Their hands had already then let go of each other. "Two vodka martinis for me and the gentleman." Owen ordered as Curt elegantly slid into the barstool beside him.

The bartender nodded and went to work, paying no attention to the two anymore. "So you're Owen Carvour huh?" Curt questioned looking him up and down. "I expected someone greater looking I must admit." He added and Owen turned his head just a bit with an amused and just as charming as before smirk.

"What am I not good enough for you?" He questioned raising his eyebrows expectantly. Curt really expected the great Owen Carvour to be even more professional looking, this man wasn't bad looking, he just didn't look like as much of "the world's greatest spy" as Curt would've thought. Although Curt wasn't exactly sure what he had expected.

"Oh I didn't say that, in fact you are just my type." Curt smirked bobbing his head just slightly closer to Owen who's smirk was just as evident. Just a second later both had a drink before them and had their attention turned away from one another. Curt had picked up his glass and was spinning it slightly in his hand, the ice and glass hitting with each other in clinking noises. Owen had picked his up and seemed to be examining it for a moment before he turned to Curt, his glass still raised.

"I propose a toast." He said, turning Curt's head as well so that their eyes met once again. Curt frowned slightly at this idea, not knowing exactly what they were supposed to toast for. This wasn't much of a special celebration exactly, for the two of them to meet. "To what?" Curt questioned scrunching his eyebrows slightly together.

"To the world's greatest spies." Owen smirked and Curt let out a laugh, lifting his glass up to Owen's and letting them clink together. "To the world's greatest spies." He repeated and then both took a nice big sip of their vodka. Curt looked at Owen as he sat down his drink and ran a hand through his slick dark hair pulling it back. He was about to speak up again, but he didn't have the chance because they were abruptly interrupted.

"Agent Mega, you've met Agent Carvour." Cynthia's voice rung behind them and Owen spun around swiftly practically leaping off his chair to greet her as a real gentleman. He took her hand and leant in close kissing her softly on the cheek.

"Cynthia," He said and Curt noticed how his accent made her name sound almost delicate which wasn't something he was used to thinking about her. "Always a pleasure." He smirked and to Curt's surprise Cynthia looked actually flushed at this greeting. Which he had in fact never seen before either. Maybe Owen was in fact as charming to women as he appeared to Curt.

That was when Curt noticed the man that had arrived with her. He recognised him immediately from the organisation's files. He was the leader of MI6 and therefore also Owen's boss. "Yes, it's been quite the pleasure in fact." Curt responded to Cynthia's previous comment and couldn't help but notice the widening smirk on Owen's face as he said this.

"Well, boys," Cynthia began pausing to straighten her dress. "Andrew here and I have been discussing recent happenings and come to discover you two are working on the same leads. And as this is international business we thought it would be a good idea for the two of you to work together on the next mission." She explained and Curt could feel Owen's eyes on him and already knew him well enough to know the smirk on his face.

"That sounds like a marvellous idea Cynthia, I'm sure Curt and I will quite enjoy working together." Owen said, Curt finally looking at him again instead at Cynthia. "Or what do you think chap?" Owen then added, hitting Curt swiftly but not too hard on the chest. Curt nodded in agreement which seemed to make Cynthia quite happy. She exchanged a glance with Andrew before nodding.

"Well good, now if I may borrow Curt for a minutes there are a few people I need to introduce my best agent to." Cynthia then said taking a hold of Curt and pulling him away from both the leader of the MI6 and it's best agent. She pulled him along to some important world leaders that he didn't pay attention to, not because he was bored but because he was too busy staring at Owen from across the room. The other seemed to be playing it cooler than he was, chatting to a few people and dancing with beautiful women in long gowns. Only when he did his eyes stayed with Curt every time they had the chance. The small glances and smiles Owen sent him from across the room as he too chatted and danced around were driving him mad.

Curt had always known he wasn't exactly like everyone else, that women weren't so much his area as everyone seemed to think. He respected women and liked their company but that was all. Men on the other hand, that was a little more complicated. Now Curt knew it was wrong and every piece of society told him no, but Owen wasn't the first he'd met that he had taken interest in or who had taken interest in him. Yet Owen for sure was the most intriguing out of those he had met. First of all he was a spy, he recognised Curt's lifestyle and the way he lived. If anything Curt felt it was perfect because they were both spies and now they were even working together. If fate wasn't trying to cook something up between them Curt didn't know what was happening.

"Curt." Barb snapped a finger in front of his face, catching his attention again. He had switched Cynthia out with her about an hour ago and had been dancing and chatting with her for a while just because he had nothing else to do, and because Owen seemed so busy with his own things. "What were you thinking about?" Barb questioned and Curt just shrugged.

"Just a mission Cynthia was talking about earlier. I'll be working with Agent Carvour from MI6." Curt made sure his way of addressing Owen made it seem as though he thought of the other agent purely professionally, because there wasn't supposed to be any other way for him to think about Owen.

"Oh yes, Owen." Barb commented acknowledging that she knew of him, maybe even personally. Though Curt took noticed that she didn't speak of him like others seemed to do. Even when Cynthia had been calling him a bastard earlier it had been with admiration, Barb spoke of him as if he didn't matter to her at all. No admiration in her voice, her eyes didn't light up she didn't seem to be interested, at all even though she sounded as though she knew him, which Curt found interesting.

He was about to say something more when he looked over to the spot Owen had previously been in and not seeing him there. Almost in distress Curt glanced hastily around although trying to make it seem as though he was just looking casually around. When he didn't see Owen anywhere else in the room he went over all the possibilities for where he could have gone and settled for the most likely to be the toilet. "Excuse me for a moment Barb." He said quickly as he begun moving through the crowd trying to not interfere with anything.

When he arrived at the toilets he paused for a moment outside realising he really didn't have any good reason to be in there. He could just wait outside to see if Owen was in there, but then decided he would go in. Just in case it was empty in there other than Owen and he could do what he had wanted to for an hour and a half.

Just as he came through the door of the men's bathroom, hands grabbed his shirt collar and pushed him towards an open stall. Before he even had the chance to process what was happening Owen's lips were on his only moments before they entered the stall which he quickly shut behind them, still kissing Owen. "You're as smart as I thought." He said breaking apart from Curt for a moment and smirking slightly at him with those shining dark brown eyes. Then Owen was kissing him again and Curt let his arms join too placing them around Owen's neck pulling him even closer to himself.

Curt had been with men before, though never for more than a night never for more than a short amount of time. He had never got to know them or developed real feelings for them but Owen was already so different, for Curt knew he already had feelings for him. He had only known Owen for a few hours, and he didn't know much about him, but Curt could already tell Owen understood him in a way no one else could.

"We should get out of here." Curt breathed letting go of Owen for a second to look him in the eyes and speak to him. The other's eyes sparked with curiosity at this comment and stopped for a second to push back his dark hair, which Curt found way too attractive.

"Are you sure?" Owen questioned keeping his voice low incase someone was in the bathroom or was about to enter it. "Do you want to do this?" He said putting his arms around Curt's neck and running them down the back of his head and through his hair.

"I want you." Curt whispered kissing Owen again tenderly. The other smirked, before nodding and backing out from the stall letting it close behind him. Then Curt heard him going over to the sink, washing his hands as if he had just been to the toilet and then his steps across the floor leaving. Then Curt did the same. Exited the bathroom stall and then the bathroom.

He met Owen right outside, waiting by the door beside the bathroom, one that led out into an empty lobby. Owen's smirk was apparent, and Curt was itching to kiss him again right then and there, but knew the better of it. Owen nodded at him professionally, and opened the door, holding it open for him. Curt walked outside, and Owen followed suit, letting the door slide shut behind them. The moment it closed Curt kissed Owen again, having already checked to see that no one was around. He could feel Owen's constant smirk still on his lips as he kissed him back, pushing him up against a wall behind them.

Owen then pushed back a little. "My room," pecking him in between sentences. "Or yours." He smirked, his arm up against Curt's throat as if they were in a fight, and not in the middle of making out with one another.

"Mine is just a few floors up." Curt grinned pushing away his now quite messy dark hair. Owen grinned too and nodded, taking his hand and pulling him towards the elevator. The room was still empty, and the moment Curt had pushed the button for the floor they were going to he begun kissing Owen again. Not roughly and hungrily anymore, just body against body close, lips softly touching in between. When the elevator opened the two stood a feet apart, with arms crossed, but the floor was just as empty as the rest.

Curt took the lead, heading for his room, and Owen followed closely, Curt could almost feel his breath on the back of his neck, but it wasn't an unpleasant thing. When they finally reached his room, Curt put the key in the hole and swung the door open, pulling Owen in after him by his collar. Owen closed the door, and locked it, before pushing Curt up against it while freeing himself from his jacket at the same time. Then he begun tugging at Curt's jacket, but Curt had other plans, pushing instead Owen, while still kissing him, towards the large bed.

....discontinued

[larryfanfiction]

suspendrs @suspendrs

💚 satellite (100k)

“It’s been three years since I’ve had a proper hot meal,” Louis says finally. “I have no idea where my family is, or if any of them are even still alive. The only reason I’ve been able to keep myself alive for as long as I have is because I keep to myself, stay guarded, stay hidden. It’s the only way I know how to live,” he says.

Harry wants to cry, but he tries to put on a brave face when Louis finally meets his eyes. “You’re safe here. You don’t have to be so guarded around me,” Harry says quietly, earnestly.

“That’s very sweet of you,” Louis says, putting his fork down. “But yes I do. Especially around you.”

Or, Harry finds out that someone's been living in his house without him knowing, but instead of kicking him out, he falls in love with him.

💚 sugar in a plum (4k)

“I’m your dad,” Harry says softly, extending his hand to Plum for her to have a sniff. Plum considers for a moment, looks up at Louis, and then bites Harry’s finger.

“Ow!” Harry shrieks, pulling his hand away quickly. He’s not bleeding, but Plum’s teeth are incredibly sharp, he feels like he’s been stabbed with ten tiny needles. “Jesus, Lou, I thought we were getting a cat, not a demon.”

Or, Harry's new kitten is out to ruin his life.

💚 there are no atheists in foxholes (64k)

“Do you think we’ll ever see it again?” Harry asks after a minute. “London?”

Louis blinks, looking down. They very well could spend the rest of their lives on this island, and they’re both very aware of that. Everyone probably already thinks they’re dead, anyway. Their flats are going to be sold, and their families are going to have funerals, and life is going to go on without them. Even if they do get rescued, it’s already been days. The news of the shipwreck has definitely reached London by now. They don’t know if there’s been any effort to look for survivors, but they also don’t know how far away from the wreck they are, or how far people are going to go to look for them, or if anyone even knows that this island is here and, like, it’s very possible that they’ve already looked and stopped looking for survivors, and no one knows they’re out here-

“I don’t know,” Louis says, before he can start spiraling. “I hope so, but I don’t know.”

Or, the sea takes everything from Louis, but it gives him back more than he ever could’ve asked for.

💚 keep this love in a photograph (48k)

“I could never forget a damn thing about you, Harry Styles, not even if I wanted to,” Louis says. His hair falls into his face when he glances over at Harry, the moonlight reflecting off of it and making it glow golden, like maybe Louis himself is the sun.

Harry thinks of how dark and cold his life got once Louis went away, how Harry got a taste of the sweetest sunshine imaginable and then was plunged into the longest winter of his life. He feels like he’s been buried under mounds of snow for months, years, and he’s finally made it to spring, finally getting another taste of how wonderful life can be.

Or, it’s 1919, and Harry’s been falling in love with his best friend for his entire life.

💚 not even the gods above (25k)

The thing is, though, this isn’t good enough for Harry. Sure, he has the rest of his life to be a notable king, but he wants to be notable now. He wants to bring the two kingdoms together and he wants to do it early on, wants to be the one to facilitate the merge until it seems like the two kingdoms were one all along. He doesn’t want to wait, but everyone he’s turned to thinks waiting is the right choice, so he supposes he has to trust them.

That is, of course, until a declaration of war from the Kingdom of Tomlinson shows up at his palace.

Prompt: Both are new kings of countries that haven’t been allies for the past decade. They need to come up with a treaty which means actually spending time with another. A hate-to-love.

💚 i'll take your pain (2k)

It’s kind of romantic when Harry thinks about it, feeling all the pain of the person he’s supposed to love for the rest of his life. Sure, it’s rather inconvenient when he’s in class and his soulmate gets kicked in the balls, or when he’s sleeping and his soulmate knocks his head or his knee off something. It’d be nice if the function helped them to find each other, but Harry supposes he can live with knowing that they’re destined to run into each other someday.

Or, soulmates have the ability to feel each other's pain, and Harry finds his after getting his arse waxed. (Or, the soulmate au crack fic I can't believe I actually wrote.)

💚 the pink album (31k)

They don’t really discuss how hard it is to be in this situation, or to be doing the things they have to do to continue being together. It’s just something they don’t talk about, and that’s alright. Or maybe it isn’t, but they’ll cross that bridge when they get to it.

Or, a love seven years in the making, inspired by Harry's debut album.

💚 i'll make this feel like home (41k)

It’s nerdy, much nerdier than anything Harry would have engaged in back home. Perrie and Ed are singing some song from West Side Story and Stan is just giggling along, and it’s almost weird how weird Harry doesn’t find it. Liam and Niall would be running as fast as they could from this interaction, but somehow, Harry finds himself giggling along as well.

Maybe it’s because no one in this group seems like they should belong in this group, but Harry feels like he fits right in. He feels more himself than he has in weeks when Louis plops down beside him for a couple moments and throws out another title to add to their movie marathon. Even though he can’t contribute to the conversation about musicals and he has no idea whether The King and I or Oklahoma is more important, he never feels like an outsider.

Or, Harry is new to Plymouth and has had a rough start, but Louis won't rest until he makes it start to feel like home.

💚 dirty laundry looks good on you (19k)

“So um, Niall mentioned you haven’t lived here long. What brings you to London?”

“What is this, an interview?” Louis smirks, stealing Harry’s drink and taking a sip. “Wanted a change of scenery. Dunno.”

Harry hums and takes his drink back, narrowing his eyes playfully at Louis as he takes a long sip. “Can I buy you a drink, or would you rather keep sharing mine?”

“You most certainly can buy me a drink,” Louis grins, grabbing the bottle back out of Harry’s hand, “but I’m still going to be stealing yours.”

Or, Harry is jaded and sad and resigned to be forever alone, until Niall sets him up with a friend of his whose broken pieces may just fit pretty well with Harry's.

💚 we've got to get away from here (23k)

“It is my understanding that you are the most comprehensive member of this agency in the field of extraterrestrial life, is that right?” the agent asks. He’s trying to sound calm, but Louis can tell he’s shaken as well.

“Um, I guess so,” Louis says, glancing over at the man in the blanket again.

Suddenly, Louis’s blood runs cold. There’s something off about the man, something in his gaze, something Louis can’t put his finger on. It’s terribly unsettling, but excitement bubbles in his gut.

Or, Louis is an FBI agent who likes to think himself a paranormal expert, and Harry is the alien that somehow ended up in his office.

💚 in midnights, in cups of coffee (15k)

“Sorry about the sugar,” Louis says, backing toward his own flat. “Bundle up before you go out.”

Harry smiles so sweetly then that Louis can’t imagine he’ll even need the sugar, if the muffins aren’t sweet enough just because they were made by him. “Thanks,” he says, eyes lingering a little longer on Louis before he lets himself back into Gemma’s apartment, and then Louis is just standing in the hallway by himself.

Or, Louis is overworked and cold, Harry is stressed out, and they might be in love.

💚 autumn leaves (27k)

“Brave?” Harry frowns, caught off guard. “No, not particularly.”

“You seem brave,” Louis decides, pushing off the wall and stepping on the butt of his cigarette. “You are strong, and you are not mean. That’s good,” he assures, touching Harry’s arm gently.

“Thank you, but that’s not true,” Harry smiles ruefully. “I’m really not anything special.”

Or, Harry is an American soldier in France during World War II, and Louis is a French waiter that doesn't mean to fall in love with him.

💚 we've got unfinished business (6k)

“Maybe we have a ghost,” Harry suggests, frowning when Louis laughs. “Lots of people have them, you know.”

“Harry, ghosts aren’t real,” Louis snorts, shaking his head as he makes his way back to the kitchen. Harry pouts for a moment, until he hears Louis shriek on the other side of the door.

Or, there’s a ghost in Harry and Louis’s apartment that seemingly just wants them to date.

💚 come away with me (80k)

Louis had such big plans. He wanted so much out of life, and so did Amy. Now Bridget is going to grow up without a mother, and she’s always going to wonder what it would be like if this hadn’t happened. He wonders if she’ll blame him for her mother’s death as she gets older, or if she’ll understand that this is just as painful for Louis as it is for her. Louis doesn’t know how he’s going to raise her on his own, because he’s a fantastic father, yes, but he’s always been the fun parent, and Amy was in charge of the rules. He doesn’t know how to make sure Bridget has everything she needs all the time, doesn’t know how to make her favorite meal or how to do that one braid she loves to have in her hair or how to teach her to be the best person she can be. He doesn’t know how to live without Amy, he doesn’t know what he’s going to do.

Or, Louis has to pick up the pieces of his and his daughter's life after his wife dies, and Harry is a beautiful stranger that just wants to help.

💚 heading for a small disaster (20k)

He and Harry have never had an interaction outside of this car, and they probably never will. After all, Harry is just the guy that drives Louis to work, and Louis is just another customer. That’s all they are, really.

Or, Harry drives an Uber and Louis’s life is falling apart.

💚 maps can be poems when you're on your own (18k)

“Harry, this is Louis, the guy I was telling you about,” Liam says. “Lou, this is Harry, my roommate.”

Harry looks up and locks eyes with Louis, who is very clearly drunk. Louis just giggles in surprise and claps a hand over his own mouth, widening his eyes at Harry comically.

“Nice to meet you,” Harry croaks, watching as Louis tucks himself more firmly into Liam’s side.

Or, Harry falls in love with the guy his best friend is fooling around with.

💚 we could be enough (4k)

“I mean, what if you had a big enough crush on somebody to write into a newspaper about it and confess and you knew someone was just sitting around laughing at-”

“Harry,” Louis interrupts, smiling slightly now. “Did you write one of these?”

“No,” Harry says pointedly, rolling his eyes.

Or, Harry runs an anonymous crush confession column in the school newspaper and Louis has quite the crush to write in about.

💚 no place to call home (21k)

“What are you smiling about, Harrison,” the boy spits, body language suddenly getting defensive. “I’ll have you know that I’m-”

“Harry,” Harry interrupts, giggling. “My name is Harry. And if you’re not called Peter, then what are you called?”

The boy tilts his chin up slightly, surveying Harry like he’s checking if he’s worthy of knowing something as important as his name. “Well, Herschel, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Louis.”

Or, Louis isn't Peter Pan and Harry isn't Wendy and Neverland is nothing like Harry thought it would be, but it's perfect anyway.

💚 nobody does it like you do (58k)

“Like, I still wanna be me, and I want you to be you. I don’t want anything to change. I just wanna call you daddy sometimes,” Louis whispers.

Or, Louis isn't looking for a home, but he finds one in Harry.

💚 kiss me on the mouth and set me free (17k)

He moves on to Twitter next, where things get marginally weirder. His newsfeed is full of tweets about someone called Larry, and that apparently everyone is trying to ship him somewhere. There are a good amount of people though, mostly his hardcore gamer fans and ones with little crushes on him, that are screaming about how this Larry guy is gross.

Fifteen minutes of scrolling tells Louis that Larry Stylinson isn’t a person, but instead a combination of his and Harry’s names. The people that are claiming to ‘ship it’ are apparently rooting for them to get together, which. Okay.

Or, Louis is a gamer and Harry is a beauty guru, and VidCon is a good place to fall in love.

let us know who to feature next!

[aubrey-plaza]

Hi!! I just read all three of the staubrey fics that you recommended. Do you happen to have a longer list of your favorite staubrey fics, I would love to read them!!

this became long, so I put it under a cut

Obviously, I would be remiss to start any favourite fics list without including the two stories that got me into this ship at all.  

I used to be a major Bechloe shipper (like, I even ran a fanblog when pp1 first came out) and even though I’d read the Stacie/Aubrey pairing in fic before, I’d never quite clicked with it.

And then I read She’s Out of My League by OmACAgee / @omacagee​ and it was the definition of ‘came for the Bechloe, stayed for the Staubrey’ because I was immediately hooked on these two.

I have no idea what it was about that story specifically that hooked me in as opposed to the countless other Bechloe ft side-Staubrey I’d read before but that was it, it was like flipping a switch.

I then gravitated into the tag and found honey_hill / @relaxingwithhoney​‘s Sweeter Than This; read that in one go and I’ve been Staubrey trash ever since.

(more under the cut)

I love this ship so much so here are my favourite fics (in no particular order):

anything/everything backinthebox / @girlneedsadonut​

literally like I cannot express this enough: read all of them.

I’m going to highlight a few here but they are ALL my favourite

The whole Welcome To The Lodge At Fallen Leaves series which is STILL being written!  

You’ve Started Something is a triumph of characterisation and story building and, again, is still ongoing. The fic is a gorgeous exploration of these two characters and one of the reasons I love them as much as I do.  

Tears Are Something to Hide by backinthebox(long) oneshot — complete — canon-divergence: after Pitch Perfect 2

This story hurt my fucking soul. There are no other words for it. I’ve always believed that Stacie and Aubrey were the type of couple who, once together, could (and would) conquer the world and that little could really come between them and yet this author has written one of the only scenarios wherein I could see them apart, and really apart, not taking a break or splitting up where it’s inevitable they’ll find each other again but really break them apart with all the heartbreak and angst that comes with it.  

Set against the backdrop of being in the South, dealing with grieving someone with whom you have a tumultuous relationship, and the Bellas being fiercely a unit and a family, this story hits every beat perfect and is honestly a masterpiece.  

I had to read the story at least 3 times to really get the full force of it because it’s so beautifully nuanced and layered and every time that I go back to re-read it, I find something else about it that I love.  

This story will make you ache for these characters and it is possibly — probably — the best Stacie/Aubrey fic I’ve ever read.  

There is no standout or favourite line because the whole thing is sheer perfection.  

Énouement by backintheboxmulti-chapter — complete — canon-divergence: Pitch Perfect 1 timeline

I can’t say much about this fic without giving the plot away and what a delicious plot it is so just go read it because it features flirty freshman Stacie and assertive, confident Aubrey and lowkey the reason I headcanon Aubrey being a discreet but total player

standout line:  

And the fact that someone could blush about being good in bed had Stacie wanting more.

You Came to Me in January by Lucky_13 / @number-thirteen​multi-chapter — work in progress — canon-divergence after Pitch Perfect 2 (I think, it’s not really specified and not really important)

I love everything about this story. It finds Stacie and Aubrey a few years after (Stacie’s) graduation and they reconnect and it’s a beautifully mature telling of them falling for each other. They mesh so well together and their characterisation is absolutely on point. The author delicately balances their feelings, humour, and surroundings in a wonderfully immersive story that I keep coming back to.  

there is no specific standout line because it’s all so great, but I particularly love every scene with Mia (honestly kudos to any writer who gets me this invested in an OC!)

Prelude in Lydian Mode by Knappster / @ss-staubrey​oneshot — complete — canon divergence but not really important to the plot

I’m a sucker for the ‘we’re just sleeping together but have now developed feelings’ type of story (clearly) and this one hits it out of the park. It’s mutual pining meets secret hook ups with just enough background angst to drive the story forwards and I, for one, am in love with this fic.

standout line:

“She deserves better than someone who just fucks her at her friends’ weddings.”

The One Where They Find Out by Knappster(long) oneshot — complete — in-canon: Pitch Perfect 2 timeline

Hiding a relationship from the Bellas? Sign me the fuck up because I am a whore for those stories. I don’t know why but I just am and this fic has it all. Weird Lilly, struggling™ Beca, Jessica and Ashley duo-ness, a sprinkling of jealousy, developing feelings, heat, and just general gooey fluff.  

standout line:

Get your shit together. Get it all together and put it in a backpack, all your shit, so it’s together!” She started to walk away but walked back after a few steps. “And if you gotta take it somewhere, take it somewhere, you know? Take it to the shit store and sell it, or put it in a shit museum. I don’t care what you do, you just gotta get it together.

Aubrey in Wonderland by Knappstermulti-chapter — work in progress (seems discontinued) — in-canon & AU

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS. Honestly, I put off reading this story because I saw that it was unfinished and didn’t want to get my heart broken but in this case it is better to have loved and lost than never loved at all because this fic is absolute GOLDEN. I never in a million years would’ve imagined Stacie as Cheshire Cat and yet, reading it, it completely works and I’m dying for more. It’s the right amount of crack and humorous that makes this fic work.  

standout line:

“Tamed. She’s like a house cat now. She’s practically purring.”

Snowbound by ACamp_Toner / @ss-staubrey​multi-chapter — complete — in-canon: Pitch Perfect 2 timeline

the sexual tension here is OFF THE CHARTS and it somehow increases after they sleep together. 0/10 would not read in public again. But at it’s core it’s a wonderfully fleshed out story with adorable playful fun, set against a backdrop of a ski vacation which is unlike any other story I’ve read before.

standout line:

“Nice hat, Posen,” Beca smirked.

“How can you see it from all the way down there, Hobbit?” Beca’s smirk turned into a glare but it couldn’t rival Aubrey’s.

“Okay, okay, knock it off you two. Aubrey, the hat looks adorable on you. And Beca,” Stacie paused, thinking, “I’m sorry you’re so short.”

The One with the Roommate’s Girlfriend by ACamp_tonerone-shot — complete — AU

Friends would have been made a 1000% better with more lesbians and that’s what we have here and it’s honestly a little astounding how well this fits. This fic works beautifully and I’m in love with this AU.

standout line:

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found this great place called ‘Invisible Things for Aubrey.’ Can you give me a hand with all of this stuff?” Stacie motioned dramatically to the empty space next to her.

i hate you i hate you (i really love you) by Euterpemulti-chapter — complete — in-canon: Pitch Perfect 1 timeline

one of life’s greatest disappointments is finding an amazing fic, clicking through to the author profile and finding that it’s their only fic for your fandom/pairing and this is it, lads.  

This fic is one of few written from Aubrey’s point of view that I absolutely ADORE and her inner monologue is both relatable and so damn funny. The characterisation for both is splendidly done and the story is fun to read.  

standout line:

Simply put, as her father would tell her, she has lost control of the situation. The proper course of action in this case is to calmly handle whatever problem there is until everything is under control again. But for some reason, Aubrey can’t bring herself to push Stacie away. Her arms aren’t responding to the screaming messages from her brain, like in that movie where the guy gets possessed by little people who control him like a robot.

The First Time by youarefire / @shiaa-esttoneshot — complete — in-canon: between Pitch Perfect 1 and 2

Stacie singing to Aubrey is my absolute weakness (I have a lot of them if you can’t tell) and this story is just so soft and tender (no pun intended).  

standout line:

“I’ve been singing to you for three years, Posen, you finally got the hint.”

can my heart beat quiet? (no) by DJ Jiggle Juice (babytobin_horse) / @backtobasicbellas​ oneshot — complete — in-canon: Pitch Perfect 2 timeline

What did I say about being a slut for sneaking around and hidden relationships??? Because here we have another Stacie and Aubrey hiding their relationship from the Bellas. A particular highlight in this one is Beca’s A+ snarkiness and her and Aubrey sniping at each other while Stacie tries to keep the peace.  

standout line:  

And Stacie still isn’t quite used to this, seeing more than just lust from someone, but Aubrey makes her feel wanted all the time and sends her care packages and reminds Stacie of just how smart she is and god, Stacie thinks she’s -

love is a losing game (oh, what a mess we made) by DJ Jiggle Juice (babytobin_horse)(long) oneshot — complete — in-canon: Pitch Perfect 1 timeline — additional note: it’s a half Staubrey/half Bechloe story featuring a Steca friends with benefits type thing (but the listed pairings are endgame) (side note because I have poor reading comprehension skills and completely missed the steca tag and was HELLA surprised by that turn of events)

Basically, our lovely foursome are all in DENIAL and Beca and Stacie being as emotionally stunted as they are decide that maybe sleeping together to get over their (supposedly unrequited) feelings is the best way to go about things and it backfires.  

The Stacie/Aubrey stuff makes my chest hurt and my throat close up it’s so wonderfully written.  

It’s a lovely story and if Bechloe isn’t your thing, you can skip their scenes but I don’t recommend that because the whole story flows a lot better if you read the whole thing

standout line:  

Aubrey smells like vanilla and lavender wrapped into one. She holds Stacie tight, hand running up and down her back before she pulls away.

Stacie misses her touch already.

Can’t Fight This Feeling by snowtamale / @snowtamale​oneshot — complete — AU

I love a fun exploration of Aubrey’s issues within an AU because they tend to be similar to in-universe stories but manifest in different ways and this fic explores that. As mentioned, I also like a sex-then-feelings type of story and this one includes that. Coupled with the hi-larious sidebars? I’m here for it.  

standout line:  

(Ready to give up on love: check) 

Holding The Frame by jdc15oneshot — complete — canon divergence after Pitch Perfect 2

I don’t usually venture back to fanfiction.net for stories but this one is well worth it. For as much as I love college era Stacie and Aubrey, there’s just something about them being slightly older and slightly less unfortunate with their feelings.  

This story finds them a year after Pitch Perfect 2 ends and it’s absolutely beautifully written. 10/10 would go back to ff.net for this author.

standout line:  

“You and Aubrey have excellent chemistry. And to dance the tango, if you have chemistry, you have half the dance. You are beautiful together.”

and also the final line which I won’t spoil for you but is possibly the best ending to a fic I’ve ever read wow.  

Juncture by jdc15oneshot — complete — AU

jesus christ this story is hot. Assertive Aubrey is a thing of dreams. This author writes great smut and are the only reason I’m still subscribed to a ff.net author

standout line:  

Aubrey’s lips are soft and sure, confident yet polite, and Stacie is glad for the wall behind her because without it to lean against she’d already be a puddle on the floor.

Nowish by Psy456 / @chloes-yellow-cupmulti-chapter — complete — canon divergence after Pitch Perfect 2 — additional note: Bellas squared ship

This is… not technically an exclusively Staubrey story but it’s such a masterpiece that I can’t leave it out of this list. It’s a beautiful written work and pretty much the only fic I find myself shipping all of these women together because it is so well fleshed out (no pun intended). It’s both hot as hell and sweet as sugar and an all around great fic.  

no standout line, but all of the smut was wow-ee 0/10 do not read in public

also I re-read my own fics like all the time but this isn’t a time for self-promotion

I strongly encourage everybody to read all the other fics by the authors I’ve got here because most of them have more than what is listed here and just because a story isn’t listed doesn’t mean it isn’t absolutely incredible, especially since I don’t have the space to list every single story I love (it was hard enough picking out these to be quite honest).  

Also! If you go on a reading binge please comment; some of these stories are criminally under-commented on (especially the multi-chapters) and with all of the hate going around these days, it would be nice to show some love to the authors for their incredible writing and this awesome ship

[someobscurereference]

hey so i love your fe stuff! its soo good! but ive noticed that most of it is either gen or takes place after the relationships have gotten together (which is fine, i love that) but it did make me curious if youd be willing to share some of your headcanons (for odin/niles/leo, camilla/beruka/selena, and xander/laslow) for how they got together/developed feelings for one another? im very curious about your take on it bc i love your characterization! thank u so much for writing such beautiful fics

Aww, thank you, anon!! FE13/14 isn’t as popular as it probably once was and I definitely joined the writing fic for it part of the fandom pretty late, so I’m so pleased to hear that you enjoy my fics! Thank you!!

Secondly, anon….This is gonna be mega long and I hope you’re prepared for that, lmao (Also if you had any other questions or anything, don’t be afraid to send another ask!)

I don’t know if I have any “set in stone” headcanons for how any of these three pairs get together because I’m a multishipper who loves AUs, but if we’re talking about canon FE14 universe, I definitely have some thoughts as to how that’s going to go.

I’m gonna blabble a lot now

Odin/Niles/Leo

I actually feel like Odin would have the easiest time accepting dating people anyone, even if they’re a prince or a coworker or two people at once or he feels he has to travel to another dimension in a few years.

Like, he’s very? Pragmatic? Not necessarily 24/7 (because he loves to tell tales and exaggerate and roleplay) but Big Decisions. Like in Hidden Truths DLC, when Laslow and Selena are questioning where they should go when it’s time to leave Nohr–their home dimension with their family’s graves or to return to the world where their parents are still alive–iirc, Odin is the first one to say “We can worry about this later, we just have to deal with this now.” It’s not that he doesn’t care as much, because he super does, but I think he like? Compartmentalizes a little more? In the FE13 Future Past DLC, when he and Inigo are stuck on one side of the bridge and Brady and Yarne are on the other, Owain talks through what’s going to happen if they try to cross the bridge until he gets to the conclusion, “If you go and I stay behind, the most people in this scenario live and we still succeed, even if that means my death.” When Inigo cuts the brige with both of them on one side, Owain says, “We don’t both have to die!” Now part of this is Owain/Odin’s dramatic personality and the (probably unhealthy) self-sacrificing tendencies he almost certainly had during his years before jumping through time and even some time after, even Inigo acknowledges that Owain’s plan was probably the best way to get the gemstone to Ylisse (though not the best plan for Owain’s life.) He’s also the one who adjusts most to living in Nohr, by which I mean his homesickness and memories of Ylisse seem to weigh on him the least. While he admits to Selena in their Supports that he also is unable to sleep at night from his memories, Selena and Laslow’s Supports with him are more about their problems with missing home and he has become a kind of shoulder to lean on between the three of them.

Anyway all of this is basically evidence to say that Odin is pretty reasonable and levelheaded when not indulging in his imagination (which was almost definitely a coping mechanism of some kind in his younger years, though it may have become a bit more of an innocent hobby by the time he’s in Nohr… though I don’t want this to get dark, OTL)

ANYWAY! I think Odin is has the easiest time adjusting between all three of the Time Travel Trio, but I don’t know if he’s necessarily the one to make the first move in anything? If anything, it would have to be all three make a move at the same time (through some circumstance) or Niles/Leo get together first (even though Niles thinks his purpose in life is to “serve” Leo until he dies via their Supports and Leo probably wouldn’t want to put anyone in a weird position considering his status). I’ve written past stuff where Odin gets confident and does something bold like sit in Laslow’s lap and kiss him while Laslow bemoans never having a first kiss, and while I think Odin could catch onto moves being made on him and be down for it, I don’t think he’d be as likely to do something as bold as that for Niles/Leo like he would for someone he’s known years and years, like Laslow or Selena.

The thing about Niles is that… Idk, I don’t think he views himself as garbage? (Unless there’s a support I don’t remember.) But he definitely thinks of himself as “lower” than Leo, who he views as having saved his life and literally is the start to “good” memories in Nile’s mind. I’m not sure he’d ever make a move on Leo and compromise that relationship he values so highly unless it was something he felt Leo needed or something out of his control. (Like doing something to save Leo’s life and Leo is like “Hey do you have Feelings for me” and Niles, broken out in a cold sweat, hands shaking, answers “I mean Yes, but it doesn’t have to be weird…. unless u want that.” 

For Leo, I don’t think he really thinks about love unless it’s right there in his face. Either because he’s thinking about marriage for political reasons/someone else is getting married or because Niles/Odin is hanging around a lot and he’s like “What is this Feeling, it’s highly inconvenient but I cannot deny it exists”. (Also another thing about him is that he’s probably a little uncomfortable with Nile’s… Pedestal, I guess? For him. Like, he knows Niles values him a lot and vice versa but when Niles is like “You’re the reason my life is good and I will serve you until I Die For You,” Leo is like “I don’t know what to say but I guess ‘Thank you’ is the right response.” So he probably wouldn’t want to take advantage of Nile’s feelings either.)

(The thing about all the Royal Nohrian Sibs is that they are under the watchful eye of Garon for most of their life, and that’s a huge influence on what they are or aren’t willing to do in terms of romance until the Big Slime is no longer an issue for them. So that’s a major factor as well.)

I think Niles and Odin make a great team, but Niles is initially very suspicious when Odin/Selena/Laslow show up out of the blue and even when he trusts Odin later on, he does use that suspicion as a little jab on Odin’s origins in their C-Support when they’re having an annoyed argument. They both apologize to each other later with Odin conceding that Niles was right and his actions weren’t out of line, and while Nile’s is like, “Aw, I shouldn’t have done that, Lord Leo trusts you and that’s enough for me,” the secretiveness of Odin’s past is like. An undercurrent in their relationship on both their parts for a long time. (While meanwhile Leo does not give a single fuck what you did or who you were before you met him so long as he knows what kind of person you are now.)

So with all this I can absolutely see Niles and Leo getting together and Odin being supportive from the sidelines for a Long Time as Niles/Leo either pine a little secretly (maybe separately) or they don’t really realize their own feelings for Odin or the idea all three of them could be a thing until later. (Bc Odin is not gonna intrude on something he feels he shouldn’t and when it’s a better idea not to.) (However, if that opportunity appears and everything is Chill, Odin is absolutely Hell Yeah, down for it.)

(This didn’t really come up anywhere before but? Leo and Odin’s supports?? Are so Much????? Like, Leo doesn’t want to send Odin out on any more “adventures” he used to because according to Leo: “uh that was to be a dick to you and I literally Cannot imagine living without you now because you’re so Valuable to me, so you can’t go on any Mega Dangerous missions, sorry.” He says he wont’ keep Odin from being his own person and leaving Nohr but that he honestly wishes Odin would stay and if he does leave, all the victories afterwards will be a little “bittersweet” without Odin there. Also if Odin does leave, Leo asks that he use his title as Leo’s retainer still so there will always be that “connection” between them. 

Like??? Holy shit??

It was here that Leo struck me as the type of person to want Niles and Odin by his side literally Forever in whatever form that relationship may be, even if nothing romantic ever comes from it.)

Camilla/Beruka/Selena

My girl!! Selena!!! I love her!!!! I’ve probably written the least about Selena (I have like one unfinished Selena/Laslow/Odin fic on my computer and that’s probably it besides maybe a tiny Selena/Noire thing I wrote 2 sentences of and never finished either) but!! I think about her a lot and I love my girl!!

I rambled a lot with Odin/Niles/Leo so to cut to the chase here a bit more, Camilla/Beruka/Selena probably comes from Selena’s need to be validated and prove that she’s the Best. Camilla always reassures Selena that she’s “darling, powerful, and obedient,” which are qualities Camilla values a lot in a retainer. I think Camilla, for all her ruthlessness, also has a lot of love in her heart and so she is a little smitten with Selena (and Beruka) from the start because of these qualities they share. Camilla gets melancholy when she thinks about how Selena might leave her one day and wants Selena to know she is Camilla’s. I don’t think Camilla would ever do or say anything about her feelings while under the watchful eye of Garon because she’s not stupid and she knows what will happen if she tries to get too close to anyone while he’s within reach, but she’s not lying. When she says she loves Selena and Beruka, she really does mean it, even if her meaning gets lost in the context of all the other times she says she loves Corrin and Elise and her other siblings and such. 

(As a side note, Camilla and Selena’s C-Support is so fucking funny to me because Selena is like “hey I’m your favorite, right?” and Camilla is straight up like “I would rather murder you than you leave” and Selena’s like “that’s not….what I wanted you to say…”. Camilla is so fucking Extra??? I love it. Though she’s honestly very scary too, so that element of humor is one I’m taking with grain of salt because Camilla is also truthful in her violence. Their B-Support is similar.)

This same drive to be the Best is what causes Selena and Beruka to butt heads in their C-Support, but they show they understand each other well by calling out each other’s complexities and flaws while arguing. Later, they show they care about each other by apologizing in the B-Support, and it’s shown for all her emotionless attitude, Selena can get Beruka to smile the tiniest bit while supporting her and telling Beruka that she should do the things she loves, even if that thing is work, and that Selena is her friend. (Beruka’s questioning of “Should I really bury myself in my work?” also shows that she took Selena’s earlier words of “What even makes you You if all you do is your work/only do things for money?”. So Selena’s views do impact Beruka.)

I’m rereading their A support right now and?? It’s so sweet? Selena wants to get matching jewelry for all three of them as a symbol of their connection (and for when Selena leaves) and Beruka accepts this, despite Selena requesting she not get something that doubles as a weapon, and also says she wouldn’t wear the matching jewelry if Selena were gone because it would be “lonely” and she’d only wear it if Selena were there so she wouldn’t lose it. Like? They value each other a lot. Beruka indulges Selena in this and by extension says she’s “enjoying” herself as well��something Beruka rarely does at all. 

Beruka is a little more hesitant around Camilla, but that’s likely a response to Camilla being her employer and Beruka placing so much value in her work. It’s a complicated situation for someone who isn’t as casual as Selena or Odin are with their Lord/Lady. Beruka admits she would betray Camilla if offered something better from another employer, but that possibility is so unlikely because she doesn’t think she could find anyone she trusts as much as Camilla. For an assassin, trust is a big deal. Camilla is a huge part of Beruka’s heart even if Beruka doesn’t recognize it the same way someone else might. Camilla, on her part, is pleased but orders Beruka not to throw herself away in the process because Beruka means a lot to her. Their relationship is a bit different than Camilla and Selena’s or Selena and Beruka’s because of their unique dynamic and how seriously Beruka takes herself. Camilla is somewhat less affectionate when alone with Beruka, most likely because it makes Beruka uncomfortable. The affection is still there; Beruka just doesn’t yearn for it as much and so Camilla backs off a bit. Beruka is very truthful about the realities of life–both Beruka’s job and how she’ll probably stick with Camilla forever, even if she doesn’t explicitly say so. They’re good. 

I’m getting off track again, sorry. I love character analysis. ANYWAY!

Camilla/Selena/Beruka would probably get together all at the same time because Camilla wouldn’t want anyone to misunderstand or feel left out (even if Beruka would insist she didn’t feel anything about it, she probably would.) Selena would probably push about being the Best Retainer again and Camilla would say something like, “Oh, but I love you both equally” and pull Beruka and Selena close. Selena would probably grumble something like “but do you really?” or “but who do you love more?” or something, letting a little jealousy take hold. Camilla probably wouldn’t stand for this, both on the basis that she loves them equally and that this has been probably going on for years. 

To be honest, I could see them kind of… falling into it. Like Camilla kissing Selena’s forehead or cheek, leaving a big lipstick mark behind and while Selena sputters, face red and brain reeling, Camilla does the same thing to Beruka.

“Wha–What’s that supposed to mean?” Selena asks, eyes rolling in her head and steam coming from her ears.

“I told you,” Camilla says simply. “You are both my precious, darling retainers.”

Beruka, eyes closed in thought: “Hm.” 

And before anybody can do anything else, Camilla’s like, “okay, chop-chop, we have things to do, people to kill” and they just go about doing their daily jobs and fighting battles. And anytime Selena or even Beruka tries to question it, Camilla’s like, “I told you, I love you both” and kisses their cheek again. Eventually maybe Beruka and Selena talk a little among themselves, but honestly I really see them falling into it after that. Kissing their foreheads every time they separate (never the mouth in the beginning, unless Selena or Beruka initiate because this isn’t supposed to be a pressured thing). Selena and Beruka heading off to their own rooms at night and Camilla telling them they can stay with her if they want. Selena’s a bit rowdy, but I think she’d be content with starting off like this just because it’s Camilla. (She might confront someone if anyone else tried to pull this move.)

(I take most C-A Supports for all party members as having really happened in-game eventually, so this might even be after Beruka’s support with Odin where he tries to help her understand her own emotions through mimicking facial expressions and looking within herself and stuff via lying about magic spells. So Beruka might discover a bit more about herself here too, like “Hmm, is this what love feels like? It must be.” Even though she’d probably been feeling it for a while and not recognizing it.)

Xander/Laslow

The thing about Xander/Laslow is that while Camilla and Leo have varying levels of more freedom between the two of them, Xander is The Crown Prince. He’s the one to take the throne. He has do what’s best for the people, and he’s always going to put Nohr before himself. On the flipside, Laslow is a flirt but he knows how fickle life can be and often laments the fleeting connections between people as they only have a short time in this world (he gets super melancholy in some of his supports; he hides his sadness a lot but it’s there), and I don’t think he’d want to jeopardize his relationship with Xander or put him in a bad position either. Plus, he’s super-duper homesick, so he wouldn’t want to start anything he felt he couldn’t finish either. 

I really think there’d have to be a big catalyst for their relationship to begin. One of two things probably has to happen.

1. Something really relieves Xander of his pressures as King and makes him relaxed enough to maybe request a kiss or courtship from Laslow one day, if/when Laslow ever feels he wants it, no pressure (though I don’t know what this event would be; Xander feels LOT of responsibility. Duty chains him more than anything. Even if he feels mentally exhausted by everything and restraining his feelings on top of that, he’s always going to be stuck unless something forces him to move or slackens that grip.) (Laslow, in turn, is also chained by what he feels is his obligation and memories to return to Ylisse some day, so he’s stuck a bit too.)

2. Like in Home (Is Where The Heart Is) (spoilers), Xander realizes if he doesn’t do something, he will lose Laslow forever In This Moment, Right Now and (as this is a huge fear) Goes For It via Kiss of Life or pouring his feelings out. (I really think Xander is the type of person to make huge declarations of devotion and love while Laslow melts into a huge blushing puddle in the corner while crying from being overwhelmed.) 

They would mutually pine. A Lot.

I’ve written a lot less for them but I’ve written so much already and I think at least one of these two events are really the needed qualifications for a Xander/Laslow relationship to happen in canon universe. (There are other AUs on ao3 that are super good and probably do a better job of imagination than I will here, so :p)

All three relationships probably have an undercurrent of Devotion For My Lord/Lady because they are all retainers/royals first and foremost and jobs come first, but that’s an interesting dynamic to work around in itself. 

Even if were only friendship between them all, I really like how Odin/Selena/Laslow are so willing to say, “MY Lord/Lady is the best one!” (I’m mostly thinking of the Beach DLC where everyone fought for that beach trip, whether or not their Lord/Lady wanted it.) They love the Royal Nohrians so much, no matter the context. 

(RIP Me, this is super long and I just spent the last 2 hours writing it. If there was anything you wanted me to expand on, let me know! I’m a blabber mouth.)