#i always struggle with tags since i only want to tag relevant stuff; the rest is just ramblings or easter eggs

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

I'm not sure if your event is open just yet (potential time differences) but may I request Lilia, as the ghost, with the prompt 6.Bump in the night with romantic, fluff and maybe a bit of horror cause we know Lilia likes to scare people please?

I'm so sorry if I didn't do this right 😅

Bump in the Night; Lilia Vanrouge

Content; Gender-neutral reader, implied romantic feelings/pining

Content Warning; Swearing, light fear

Word Count; 700+

A/N; I hope you like what I came up with, Lilia will always be a little imp. And don't worry about formatting, you did everything perfectly!

Please do not put my work into AI. If you would like to see more of my work check out my masterlist!

You were grumbling to yourself as you lit some candles while holding a flashlight under your chin.

The power had gone out due to a blizzard, right when you were in the middle of catching up on your favourite show. But the weather didn’t care about the plotline or the barely warm soup that was now sitting sadly on your stovetop. No show and no dinner, you were shit out of luck tonight by the looks of it.

So instead, you grabbed all the candles you could find, a small horde of blankets, and hunkered down.

You fidgeted around, picking at some loose strings, and tapping to the beat of the battery-operated clock. 

… bored bored bored THIS SUCKS bored bored bored …

You dragged your hands down your face. Why couldn’t the power go out while you were asleep? Why did it have to go out on one of your only quiet nights to yourself? Why couldn’t the power wait until you had your dinner? 

The wind howled outside as if it were mocking you.

The hairs on the back of your neck stood on end, and the candles snuffed out, one by one. Not by a draft, or wind, but as if someone was pinching off the flame. The room was cast into darkness, only the pale blue light from outside lighting everything up in a dim silver cast.

Face the issue at hand that had all levels of nope nope NOPE written all over it? Or, hide under the blankets like you were a kid again?

… you hid under the blankets. You reasoned it wasn’t from fear, but rather to conserve your body heat, since hey, the candles died out due to some unforeseen and totally normal reason.

But then you smelt something burning.

There was no power though, nothing was working so why was something burning?

You shuffled to the kitchen and peered out from your blanket cocoon.

The soup, which was barely lukewarm, was now a charred mess of black sludge.

“The hell,” you hissed, eyeing the baffling liquid. Part of your brain was screaming DANGER DANGER DANGER!!! And the other part? It was mourning the loss of your dinner.

A breathy chuckle was in your ear.

You wanted to move, but you couldn’t. You were frozen in place by some unseen force.

You felt delicate fingers trace the back of your neck before they came to a stop at a pulse point, which was easy enough to find since your pulse was beating like a trapped bird trying to escape a cage.

“You always look the same,” the voice whispered, the chuckle and playfulness long gone.

The voice flitted closer, and you could make out a hazy figure in your peripheral vision, but just barely.

The figure, a petite figure, came to a stop in front of you. The only thing about them that felt physical, that was the most clear, were their magenta almost red eyes. They bore down on you with a weight; of knowing, of countless years, of longing, and a mix of grief and mischievous — an odd combination.

“What do you want,” you asked, fighting your mouth to spit out the words.

The man, you assumed the spectre to be a man at least, gave you a soft smile.

He took your face into his cold hands, or at least tried to, and rubbed circles into the apple of your cheeks. “Many things, dearie,” he sighed softly, “but only if you want them too. I’ll leave if you want me to. I just want to see you happy.”

An odd thing to say when you nearly gave me a stroke. 

Despite that near stroke though, you didn’t sense any malevolence from the ghostly figure who held you softly. And despite his cold touch, he was nothing but warmth, but in the sense of a weak candle.

One must just take care of the flame to see it grow.

Time after time, Lilia would find you, his spirit drawn towards yours.

I love you.

Never really said, but it would end in the same way. Him quietly loving you from the sidelines until he found his opening. An opening into your life, and your heart.

~~~~~~~

Taglist; @afunkyfreshblog @bloomstruck @eynnwwyjth @identity-theft-101 @ithseem @lucid-stories @moonsoup01637 @ryker-writes @twistwonderlanddevotee @xxoomiii

[guesst]

some of the best fantasy au fics for bnha that i've read

i decided to make a fic rec list of one of my favourite aus/fusions. mostly midoriya-centric, there are some crossovers (with hp), and a lot of different ways in which the authors have taken them - so it could be Quirks, ghosts, outright fantasy aus, spirits, witches etc etc. there isn't a specific order and there aren't a tonne (these are the ones i could find buried in my bookmarks lol), but the ones on the list are all really well written i love them.

i've tried adding relevant information, the summary (shortened if it's pretty long) and just. adding some random tags that may be important. not all of them though. obviously this is not a complete list and there will most definitely be more fics out there, if there are some really good fics that you know that aren't on this list, feel free to tell me, i'd love to read them!!!

i hope someone enjoys these!

Faith Becomes You by SugaSuga

oneshot | gen dfo, quirkless midoriya summary 'There's a tiny shrine in Musutafu that's overgrown with kudzu vines between Izuku's apartment and his middle-school. There may very well still be a god inside it. There may be nothing but the myth of a man from when Quirks were first emerging. Izuku hides in its walls for a while and ends up tending to the forgotten shrine. All good deeds have their impact, don't they?'

Of Mythos and Men by Oceanbreeze7

oneshot | gen spirit animal au, kinda summary (shortened) 'When he was young, Midoriya always wondered what his mythos would be. The matching half to his quirk, the ancestry of its power. Mythos were strange things, not linked genetically like quirks seemed to be. [...] Midoriya hadn't met his mythos. Even in UA. (In his dreams, something called to him, 'Chase me!')'

what a lion cannot manage by LadyLiterature

multichapter | ongoing | f/m, m/m kitsune au, female izuku, future bakudeku summary (shortened) 'She wants to be a hero. Wants to save everyone she meets and even the people she hasn’t. [...] A smart fox avoids fights. A smart fox does not seek them out. A smart fox does not fight for everyone. A smart fox, when they absolutely must, only fights for themselves and what is theirs and nothing else. Izumi, for all that she tries to be, is not a good fox.'

My Magic Academia by Kiterou

series | oneshots and multichapter | ongoing | gen HP crossover, wizard midoriya, platonic bkdk, some ocs summary (shortened) ' [...] In which Midoriya Inko is a witch and Izuku a wizard and even after 150 years of quirks taking over the world, Izuku still couldn't tell Kacchan that he isn't worthless and that he still could become a hero all on his own.'

A Lonely Windchime Makes No Sound by Musecookie

multichapter | ongoing | multi reader/shinso, total fantasy au, very wholesome summary (shortened) ' [...] You enjoy visiting your slightly creepy local library. When you accidentally befriend the elusive owner's familiar, he begins to appear more and more when you visit. You don't really mind, and he doesn't seem to hate you, even when the two of you become tied up in each other's fate as you pursue the secret to reviving a magical species of flower. Soft Strangers to Friends to Lovers type beat with lots of fluff and naps! Sleepy cuddles included.'

The grapes of friendship by Gentrychild

oneshot | gen crack, dfo, vampire izuku summary 'Izuku, a dhampir hiding his real identity as he goes to UA, the best wizard school in the country, spends the day with his friends. None of them are aware of it.'

Yesterday Upon the Stair by PitViperofDoom

multichapter | complete | gen less supernatural, izu's quirk lets him see ghosts, he still has ofa summary (shortened) 'Midoriya Izuku has always been written off as weird. As if it's not bad enough to be the quirkless weakling, he has to be the weird quirkless weakling on top of it. But truthfully, the "weird" part is the only part that's accurate. He's determined not to be a weakling, and in spite of what it says on paper, he's not actually quirkless [...] Not that anyone would believe it if he told them.'

sum of all (and by them driven) by Elemental

series | multichapter | ongoing | gen dadzawa, spirits give quirks, izu sees these spirits series summary 'Quirks aren't what you think they are.' first part summary (shortened) 'Midoriya Izuku is medically quirkless, not technically homeless, perpetually exhausted and doing his damned best despite it all. He also sees spirits, which might be cool if not for the fact that a) no one else does, b) they really don't like him very much, and c) he's pretty sure the heroes now think he's a villain working for the League [...]'

The Struggles of a Modern-Day Vampire by miraculousemily47

oneshot | gen crack, 1-a shenanigans, vampire midoriya summary 'After Midoriya Izuku is turned into a vampire towards the end of his first year at U.A., he decides he wants to tell his classmates about his condition. The only problem is that he can't physically say the words, and his classmates are fucking idiots.'

Lights in the Dark by FrostKitten

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen supernatural au, izuku can see demons etc, quirkless/magic au summary (of first part) 'Midoriya Izuku, like most young kids, knows there are monsters. They live in closets, under beds, and occasionally in the park. As he grows older, his friends stop seeing them...but he still does.'

Hand in Unlovable Hand by jumbletea

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen vampire midoriya (and aizawa), dadzawa, toga n dabi n mido being siblings summary 'A collection of stories surrounding a not-quite-human Izuku and everyone he meets along the way.'

Simply Superstitious by CryCaladrius

multichapter | ongoing | gen lots of folklore and yokai and stuff, 'quirkless' magic user izuku, decent dad hisashi too summary (shortened) 'Izuku Midoriya’s father is a Hou-ou — a Japanese phoenix. For some reason, this means yokai have a standing invitation to pester Izuku with their existence. Birds assemble choirs for his birthday. If there’s no cedar leaf under the welcome mat, the amazake babaa that lives two apartments over will be knocking on their door by evening. His yokai-purifying excursions get mistaken for vigilantism far too often. [...]'

Cuckoo Bird (anonymous author)

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | gen it may be discontinued but theres lots of fae folklore, deku is a changeling, deals etc, plus some platonic shindeku building up?? summary 'There's something off about Midoriya Izuku. (change·ling /ˈCHānjliNG/ noun a child believed to have been secretly substituted by fairies for the parents' real child in infancy.)'

tread softly as you go by IceEckos12

oneshot | gen if you read any fae au please let it be this! has faeries but mido is not one summary 'Humans used to be good at the old ways. They used to know how to bait the trap, to spin a web of words and lies that would ensnare even the most wily. Humans used to be able to twist deceptions around knots of iron and turn them into weapons of power. They forgot a long, long time ago. A boy unwittingly makes a deal with one of the fae, severing his ties to humanity. However, he finds that the fae world is far more strange and complex than he ever could have imagined.'

Hell is just a shoujo manga by supercrunch

multichapter | complete | f/m fantasy au, bakudeku, fem!izuku, isekai, dekusquad stuff, also some iidachako summary (shortened) 'Izuku wakes up crushed under a statue, trapped in the body of a princess who doesn't exist. Turns out she's a demon, which is weird. What's even weirder is the déjà vu that surrounds Kamino palace, reminding her of the events of this one manga she used to love. [...] But that's probably just a coincidence. [...] The problem here, obviously, is that Izuku's the demon princess. Ergo, she's a villain. And that means she's going to die at the end of this manga. Again.'

hold your breath as you cross by cassiopeia721

oneshot | gen dadzawa, another 'quirks are from spirits au' (expect more of those actually), mido is sad :( summary 'As the bridge between the world of guardian spirits and the quirk users who are blessed by them, Izuku's duty is to clean up the mess his predecessor left. It's taken what feels like an eternity worth of work, but Izuku's finally finished, and he's ready to rest at last. Unfortunately, the pro heroes who just watched him take down the Scourge of Kamino have no intention of letting him just wander off, and he finds himself stuck in an interrogation room with a bunch of humans who he's sure will never believe a word he says.'

To See with Eyes Unclouded by CrazySatan

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen witch au, witch midoriya, quirkless mido, bkg is not a good friend series summary 'Midoriya Izuku is a witch. A powerful witch. And even though he doesn't have a quirk, and magic doesn't Work Like That, Izuku ends up a hero. Somehow.'

Demons and Darkness by wolfsrainrules

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen dadzawa, shinso and mido and bkg are becoming friends, they can see monsters/spirits/bad things summary of first part 'Izuku has believed in the things that go bump in the night since he was small. That means he can see them, and almost everyone he knows....can't. So he decides he's going to be the shield humanity needs, no matter what. Eventually, he finds others that See too.'

know what i've made by the marks on my hands by simkjrs

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | gen dadzawa, quirk spirit au (this inspired most of the others on this list), also eri summary (shortened) 'Midoriya Izuku just wants to lead a quiet, peaceful life. This is foiled by the fact that a) he can see spirits, b) his good nature demands that he help anyone he sees in trouble, and c) he, by all rights, should not exist. [...]'

Izuku haunts class 1-A by Artistic-Gamer

series or multichapter whichever floats your boat | incomplete (hiatus) | other there are some triggering themes! such as suicide, blood, body disfigurement! please take care of yourself and avoid reading if this will hurt you! in other news: so much dadzawa, so much friendship, hurt mido summary (of first part) 'Class 1-A is rumored to be haunted, only the residents are aware it’s more than just a rumor..'

U.A's Resident Ghost by BeyondTheClouds777

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | gen ghost midoriya, dadzawa, friendships!!!! summary 'There is a ghost at U.A. Not haunting U.A. Not even hanging out at U.A. There is a ghost. Enrolled. As a student of U.A. And it's just Shouta's luck that he has everything to do with it.'

and now, the weather by xylophones

oneshot | gen CRACK, paranormal/ghost hunters au, dekusquad stuff summary 'Izuku runs a fictional horror radio show. Because ghosts aren’t real. Right? (“Holy shit, ghosts are real,” Izuku whispers. Then, with the smugness of a sixteen-year-old who just won a decade long bet, “I knew it! Kacchan owes me five hundred yen!” “Midoriya,” Todoroki sighs, “this ghost is trying to kill us.”)'

U.A Unsolved by handcrusher(ameliafromafairytale)

oneshot | gen (it's a fic of a fic, so if you've read yesterday upon the stair then you'll understand better) izuku can see ghosts thats his quirk summary ' "Hey there, ghosts," Midoriya says, "it's me, ya boy." The dorms are haunted. Shenanigans ensue.'

The Haunting of Class 1-A by BritishRobutt

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | n/a ghost midoriya, vigilante au, crack, the ghost bit is izu's quirk summary 'Everyone always told Izuku he couldn't be a hero, so when he dies and discovers his quirk, he becomes a vigilante out of spite. Whoops. After becoming Spectre, Japan's most wanted vigilante, Izuku realizes he can just fulfill his dreams of going to the top heroic school- after all, who can physically stop him from attending UA when he's a literal ghost?'

Caged by SternStunde

oneshot | gen tododeku, fantasy au (todo is a dragon, mido is a princess), genderbent deku (fem deku) summary 'Then she held up one of the books and smiled. "Want to learn an ancient language with me?" She was kind of a nerd, and she really hoped the dragon was too.'

Magic Runs Deep by draconicschinx

multichapter | ongoing/probably discontinued | gen mido has a quirk and he can see mythical creatures. summary '"Midoriya Izuku has always been good at making friends. Not human ones, really, but they are good friends nonetheless. " Izuku can see and talk to and interact with mythical creatures. It's not exactly the quirk he was hoping for, but he's going to use it to help humans and his non-human friends all the same.'

[iacon-stargazer]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE: MUN & MUSE

fill out & repost ♥ this meme definitely favors canons more, but i hope oc’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. multimuses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

tagged by: stolen from @oneshallfall like.... months ago. im a slow gremlin hjksd. it's been in my drafts and i finally decided to finish the last few sections while working on clearing them out

tagging: steal it

MY MUSE IS.   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless

is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  Well.../ NO / IDK. (i know optimus is but i don’t really... know about orion? i have seen a handful of fanartists who turn him into a very sexualized moe baby but i’m not sure about the fandom at large)

is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

are they underrated?  YES / NO. (lmao there’s like no fan content with him unless it’s with megatronus) 

were they relevant to the main story?  YES / NO.

were they relevant to the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO. (not yet.... lol)

how’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?

This... this is a trick question in this goddamn mess of a continuity. That said, I try my absolute best to make my portrayal coherent with the TFP show... even if said show contradicts itself at times. I take inspiration from the earlier parts (the thirteen primes section) of the Covenant of Primus for his origin backstory, but ignore the rest of the Covenant since it makes absolutely no sense with his characterization in... literally anything else. I’ve peeked at Exodus and it utterly sucks, but I’ve picked up bits and pieces of concepts that originated there just from spending time in the fandom. Aside from that... I spend a ton of time thinking about how to weave everything together in a way that both makes sense and makes for a character development arc.

SELL YOUR MUSE! (aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.)

Orion is genuinely kind, thoughtful, and introspective, very loving of the world around him.

He’s also a more complex character than is initially obvious - despite mostly being good sweet pure baby nerd he’s still flawed, with many of those flaws being his strengths put into the wrong situation. His strong morals can lead to dogmatism, and he’s only slightly less likely to deliver lectures than Optimus. His determination to be kind and help everyone can come off as unintentionally patronizing at times; he has a very “well-intentioned semi-privileged middle class” perspective that he’s not always self-aware of. However, he’s also willing to look at himself critically and learn/adapt. 

Essentially, he has many of the same traits as Optimus... just more or less apparent and/or developed. He's less confident than he eventually becomes through his future experience with leadership, wanting to change the world for the better but sometimes struggling to ground his plans in reality—something that continues to apply, but with reduced intensity and frequency over time. Idealistic cinnamon roll will eventually develop some realism, though never really quite enough. His selflessness remains a strength for now, but we know that eventually it will dip into martyristic tendencies.

NOW THE OPPOSITE! (list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?)

He could be potentially ‘boring’ in some senses. he’s the polite, considerate ‘next door’ type, who has for most of his life has just lived as a very average middle caste nobody. He’s more laid-back than he eventually becomes as optimus, but where others might get into trouble and shenanigans he’s most likely to just express concern. And since I try to keep him at least mostly ic, even with non-serious posts, this can derail ‘fun’ stuff and I fear dissuade some interaction.

While I try my best to give him realistic flaws that work with his character, he could still be seen as a little too good. very kind, understanding, forgiving, patient, considerate... almost endlessly so. A lot of my “he’s so good and pure” interpretation comes from using his having been the thirteenth prime as backstory, where he was pretty much the epitome of that, but some might not like the “he was a literal deity in a past life” idea for its “super special chosen one protagonist” elements.

His responsiveness to his environment can also be a downside. He’s not the type to start things; he just reacts and responds, standing his ground and finding himself when things get crazy around him. without megatronus, he may have eventually attempted political campaigning, but it wouldn’t have gotten very far. He needs to have more intense characters or events around him for major plots to really go places. Without those nothing would ever happen besides slice of life fluff, because he’s content with that kind of life.

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?  

Honestly I just wanted to write op/ratch fhsjkdjsdh. But I also wanted to be able to interact with a variety of muses and so I chose Orion over Optimus because he’s not so emotionally closed off, which I figured would give more flexibility beyond the handful of characters op would reasonably have close personal and/or plot-important relationships with. Also, I can relate to him on a thought-process level which lets me get into his head easily, which additionally made him an appealing choice for my first real rp muse.

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?  

I just love him so much, especially with the layers of his character I've built up around him. I don't always have inspiration to write or rp, but I think about him a lot. When I do find motivation to write, it's generally out of wanting to continue to work on developing him and just having a chance to express his characterization.

SOME MORE PERSONAL QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN.

do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO.

do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO.  (i should do it more...)

do you think a lot about your muse during the day? YES / NO.

are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO. (at least most days fhsdhfskj)

are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO. (it waxes and wanes. I know I'm a good writer but I could still be better...)

are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO.

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?

I’ll be honest; I’ve never gotten criticism. I haven’t been here very long in comparison to some and I’ve never been that popular, so I figure I’m pretty easy to just ignore. I guess how I would feel about it would depend on what it was and how it was delivered, though I like to think I would be reasonable regardless

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?  

yes? yes absolutely?

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?  

I would be curious to hear their reasoning, but I think enough about how everything fits together that chances are I would agree to disagree

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH YOUR PORTRAYAL, HOW WOULD YOU TAKE IT?

Depends on if their disagreement makes sense. Maybe I’ll give back my own reasoning for why I characterize the way I do. Maybe I’ll just agree to disagree, if their view is just totally different from mine. If they have valid points I’ll probably overthink it and spiral into self doubt. In all cases I’ll spill my thoughts to friends on discord.

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT?

......Orion in general or? ... fhsjkdhf...... Well if it was mine specifically that might hurt lol. But at the same time.... I doubt i’d agree with their takes either so... fair enough.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?  

Sure. I’m good at grammar so if something glaring is there it’s probably a typo I missed and I’ll be grateful for the chance to edit it out before more people see it lol

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN?  

Yeah. I’m pretty quiet most of the time because I just don’t have energy to talk to a lot of people, and I never want to get caught in drama. I honestly wouldn’t know what to do in a situation like that. I tend to avoid conflict, I’m quick to apologize, and polite with anyone I don’t know very well.

[fmdjaewonarchive]

► agree.

date(s): july 2020 - february 2021 mentions of: champion members, unity members (samsoo, yul & sunghee mentioned by name but like... blink and you’ll miss it)  word count: +/- 2.3k words (870w lyrics/660 words composition/740 words production) warnings: mentions of anxiety, panic attacks and car accidents details: full lyrics and full composition verification for agree, 3/3 verifications for jaewon’s upcoming album escapism. jaewon doesn’t only know how to write sad boi music, he also writes angry boi music, the only two emotions he’s ever experienced rlly. (a/n: i lost my braincells within the first 100 words and still haven’t retrieved them, read at your own discretion)

the song is born out of frustration, anger blocking up his throat to the point it feels hard to breathe.

it’s the kick-off point of champion’s world tour, a concept that has jaewon disgruntled enough as it is, snatching him away from unity and dropping him in the states like he is supposed to care about this group, like he doesn’t have better things to worry about.

but alas that’s beside his point, as much as he detests the idea behind champion, it’s not his main source of frustration.

traveling out to the states, that part is hell. now jaewon has never been a huge fan of traveling, suffering from a crippling fear of flying ever since predebut that somehow has not gotten any less severe with the sheer amount of flying all over the place unity has been doing. jaewon also absolutely hates airports, they’re too crowded, too hectic and far too stressful to not immediately put him in a godawful mood.

the cameras shoved right into his face both prior to departure and directly after arrival definitely didn't help.

comparatively, champion’s trip to the states this time hadn’t been that bad. jaewon just happens to be in an extra foul mood today but rationally, he has to admit that he’s seen far worse throughout the years.

but maybe that’s exactly the problem, how common these things have become, that getting pushed and pulled at while trying to get on flight was considered to be mild.

jaewon’s frustration isn’t solely aimed at an isolated instance, it’s at the ridiculous standard that’s been set for idols, the things they have to accept like they are normal.

normally he would call soo to complain about whatever was bothering him but with the time difference, jaewon knew his boyfriend was ought to be asleep at this hour and he definitely wasn’t waking him up for something this minor.

he even humors the thought of perhaps finding sunghee or yul to complain to but with most of champion out for the night doing whatever (admittedly, jaewon didn’t listen when they were making plans, he wasn’t gonna tag along anyway) that isn’t really in the cards either. perhaps that’s for the best, jaewon isn’t the biggest fan of actually talking to the younger unity members about what was on his mind.

either way, jaewon is stuck in a hotelroom by himself, no one around to really vent his frustration too so instead, he might just as well write it all down.

and that’s exactly what he does, settling down at the desk in his hotelroom, scribbling on a notepad randomly found laying around.

on the plane the person in the seat next to me that’s not my fan apparently buying info off the airplane company

it’s not entirely relevant to what happened at the airport earlier but jaewon feels angry all over just thinking about it. unity has had it’s fair share of experiences with saesangs, seemingly only increasing the more popular they keep getting. sure, that makes sense but it doesn’t mean it’s okay, contrary to what dimensions seem to believe with how easily the company brushes it off under the pretense of it just being another part of the job.

at the airplane lounge there’s a war between the 200 mm guns privacy, panic disorder, they barter with one another...

in the first place, jaewon’s main concern is unity, it always is. he’s willing to put up with a lot if it means the younger members are left off the hook. but he has to admit, since the panic attacks have started to become more prevalent, it’s a lot harder to take that stance. it’s hard to take care of others when he fails to take care of himself.

jaewon tries not to think about what that means for his position as a leader.

from early morning put on a mask and fight on in short, call it being a puppet...

jaewon knows he’s not an ideal idol, he’s never been and he never will be. maybe in retrospect, he would have done things differently but there is no use in considering those what-ifs now. there is, however, no denying that all of it is just a bigger struggle with him, it will never go as easily as with people who were made to stand in front of the camera’s. why shouldn’t he get to be open and honest about that? he’s not the perfect idol they want him to be, he will never fit that mold.

i know, that’s right that’s right that’s right that’s right that’s right that’s right i know that’s right that’s right that’s right

written out, the chorus feels a bit silly, but jaewon feels justified in his creative choices. not that the song is ever going to be used for anything, it’s just an attest to his frustration. jaewon knows he’s ought to sit down and silently accept whatever is expected of him.

it’s been years since he’s been his own person. these days, he’s dimensions’ property first and that of the general public second, there is no use in fighting that, no space for his voice.

so sure, whatever, he agrees, what else can he do?

---------------

jaewon forgets about the lyrics he’s written down after that.

in the moment there had been no intention to turn them into a full-fledged song, a haphazard combination of lyrics that in their raw form, probably held very little meaning, too much filler between the few parts that he did properly think through.

so jaewon forgets all about it before he even sets foot back in korea again. unity is busy enough, the release of neo zone lurking around the corner and with multiple schedules of his own, jaewon can’t even think about the song if he wants to.

it only comes drifting back into his consciousness at least a month of two having passed since champion’s american tour dates.

the day in itself isn’t anything special, if there is anything remarkable about it it’s the fact jaewon isn’t working for once. he’s just hanging around his and samsoo’s apartment, scrolling through whatever app on his phone keeps his attention for long enough.

until an article pops up.

it’s a news post about a rookie group he’s never heard of from a company he doesn’t know the name of, it has nothing to do with him, but he finds himself reading through it anyway. apparently, they got into an accident on their way home from schedules as they were being followed by saesangs. no one got injured and truly, it’s not the first time jaewon has read news like this but it does fill him with the same sense of anger as what he had experienced that first day in the states with champion.

because this type of news shouldn’t be common, for how long are people gonna pretend it is?

maybe he should finish that damn song.

wait does he even still have the lyrics?

jaewon vaguely remembers at the very least putting the sheet of paper in his backpack after the concert as he had been packing up to move to the next city of their tour but after that, he can’t say he recalls having seen it lay around.

he’s really ought to get more orderly with his drafts.

luckily for him, jaewon does find the sheet of paper, not in his bag but shoved in between the pages of a notebook and with the draft of his lyrics obtained he makes a beeline for his home studio. normally he’d do this stuff at the company headquarters but truly, that sounds like far too much work in the moment.

obviously, the song is meant to have an angry undertone to it, supposed to convey the same anger and frustration that swallowed jaewon whole as he had written the lyrics.

the deep, resonating boom of low brass sounds for the opening of the song are a no brainer, the sound gives a bombastic, ominous vibe, immediately setting the song off on the right note. it’s supposed to sound grande and honestly a little bit intimidating, a dark feeling creeping around the corners.

of course, the sound is far too theatrical to be underlaying to the entire song so jaewon alternates it with a deep, booming bassline, the brass only reappearing right before the chorus other than in the opening section as if to give off a warning. to fill up the verses and the parts in between, jaewon adds rumbling, deep drums in the background, making them feel less empty.

what really makes the song however is the rapidly-cycling electronic stuttering a rhythmic pattern across almost all parts of the song. it feels a little distracting at first before jaewon decides that really, that’s exactly what he’s going for. the melody feels just a little too fast, uncomfortably so and in a song reflecting so much stress and strain, that only feels fair, reflectives of the way his chest tightens up when he can’t breathe, when his hands tremble and his heart beats so fast it might as well make him sick.

jaewon thinks it conveys his frustrations pretty damn well.

---------------

it doesn’t seem in the books for the song to ever be released until the process of selecting songs for escapism comes along. while jaewon regains some of his creative freedom, most of it had been under dimensions terms, leaving it up to them to shape the album in a way they prefer over his creative vision.

until somewhere near the end of completing the track list, the head producer asks jaewon if he has any songs laying around that could fit in with the rest of the album.

‘agree’ is the first thing to come to mind.

the head producer seems to like the songs, enough to approve it at least and jaewon can’t help but feel a flare of pride. the producer seems intent on leaving the creative process in his hands, letting him handle the production.

it makes ‘agree’ the first song ever that’s entirely his own that he gets to release, it feels like a milestone to jaewon.

he does get a little list of suggestions, mainly pertaining to the lyrics. the producer leaves a few remarks here and there about where lines could be stronger, what he would do differently but all of it are very loose recommendations, jaewon isn’t actually under an obligation to do anything with them.

in the end, he does anyway, shuffles some lyrics around, dares to be a bit more assertive in his wording, right onto the border of what he would consider too gloat-y for himself. but the producer is right, it gets to pack a punch, it gets to be a little bit self-important. somehow having the external confirmation makes it easier to write those lyrics without feeling like a fraud. it’s still his, his writing, his song.

with the last tweaks done they’re quick to get to recording. they’re still on a time crunch as jaewon’s manager reminds him (jaewon likes the man well enough but dear lord would he never let him forget). it's one of the last songs on the album to be recorded after all and at this point, they are cutting it close.

with everything else he needs done, all jaewon has left to do is fine tune the song, the last tweaks and sounds to be added like missing puzzle pieces now he has the bigger picture pretty much laid out in front of him, polishing and detailing it to elevate the song worth of something to be released on an album.

the instrumental is already pretty hectic, fully intentional of course, but with a proper, clear recording it’s easier to spot the empty gaps, spaces to add the last finishing touches. he adds more brass, less grande and dramatic than the ones in the pre-chorus, curling around the edges of the chorus to round them up neatly and as if to scale down again for the verses, still fast paced but somewhat a breath of fresh air between one chorus and the other.

he delays the part at the opening before the brass and bass kick in, a silence before the storm feels even if the hyperactive stuttering beat is already there, he considers taking that out at first too but the point kind of is that it is more or less omnipresent, it’s always there even when there is nothing else much, like the anxiety that feels permanently stuck to his head.

there is also the addition of an extra melodic line, lingering behind that main, slightly headache inducing electronic synth. it doesn’t really stand out, especially not compared to it’s main competitor but it does remain prevalent in the few parts the main instrumental motif is nowhere to be found, giving it small moments to shine. it serves a clear function, or to jaewon listening ear at least (maybe he’s overanalyzing at this point). the little bounces of the electronic beat all over the place keep up the pace of the song, making sure its explosive nature prevails over the dark dreary undertones of the bassline and brass sections, giving it an overall dynamic feel.

it takes some fiddling, jaewon pulls something close to an all-nighter to finish up the song with the sheer amount of detail he ends up focussing on but by the time he sends it in, he has a good feeling about it at least.

when he presents the final product to the head producer, there are no more suggestions. it’s good, and it’s all his own work.

[dariaslore]

TV Show Tag Game

I wanna thank @darkpoisonouslove​ for tagging me, this looks cool and it’s a great way to save me from boredom, cuz God knows how much am I!

rules: pick 5 shows (idk if it’s enough), then answer the following questions. don’t cheat. tag 10 (or however many) people.

1) Winx Club

2) Lucifer

3) American Horror Story 

4) Glee

5) Dr House

what’s your favourite character from 1?

If I have to pick one, i would say Griffin, her character was always magnetic to me, there’s a whole hidden backstory behind her and you can’t help but falling in love with her stern. I would place next to her Darcy and Valtor.

who’s your least favourite character in 2?

Cain. I hate him and sometimes. At first he wasn’t that bad, I was curious about his story and intentions and relationship with God. During the first episode I thought he had a lot of potential and a some sort of depht to his character: he was the first assassin, a biblical figure, now chasing killer all around LA, isn’it crazy? As the episodes he dropped his good cope facade and turned out to be a ‘’douchebag’’ playing his sick game all along. And nobody can get Lucifer and Chloe to fall apart, never!

what’s your favourite episode of 4?

It’s between ‘’Grilled Cheesus’’ and "Britney/Brittany". The first is really Kurt (my fav chacters) centered, his struggles with his dad illness and founding Jesus face in grilled cheese. . Every characters gets the chance to share his personal view on religion and a very unique way and obv with music. The second one, well, I’m in love with Britney Spears and her songs and being the episode ‘’Britney theme’’ was an instant hit for me.

what is your favorite season of 5?

Season 5. We get to see into Dr House’s mind and psychology even more and it’s simply incredible.

what’s your favorite couple of 3?

Sorry, I don’t have one, except for Violet and Tate there isn’t such a big screen time given to couples, romance it’s not the main feature and if so, the two lovers don’t get to be together due to their dark twisted minds never realizing what they’re in front of it’s their real love, and it’s anthology series, so you don’t get to see all the characters every season, they are (almost) never the same. Btw I like The Countess and Donovan and I ship Mallory-Micheal Langdon for some unknown reasons. 

what’s your favorite couple in 2?

Deckerstar all the way! Look at these two!

what’s your favorite episode in 1?

I don’t remember the titles well, but 3x10 where my OTP was born. 

what’s your favorite episode in 5?

1x21, one of the best and most complex episode of Dr House. 

what’s your favorite season in 2?

The first one. We are introduced to the Devil Himself, Lucifer Morningstar in the best way possible: a black Corvette, a suit, a nightclub of perdition and free will, irony and sass and troubles with the police because, well, there ain’t no rest for the wicked!

how long have you been watching 1?

An extremely long time, I might’ve been 3 or 4, i rly don’t know. Here in Italy was such an huge thing and every girl would watch it. I still remember all the ‘’fights’’ in kindergarten for ‘’who was gonna be who’’ out of the six fairies, all the different dolls and stuff with the fairies’ faces my mom bought me and the event for the first movie. Yeah, it was just crazy but I keep all these moments dearly to my heart. I haven’t watched all the seasons, I’m not planning to, I stopped at season 4 and I rewatched the first three a couple of times and loved’em.

how did you get into 3?

I’ll tell you a story, I’ve been obsessed with magic, paranormal and horror stuff since I was a child and I would sneak into my mom’s bed cause I was too afraid to get killed by the Scream mask. Especially during middle school my bbf and I watched all the horror movies ever made in history, read a lot of books on the matter (my fav being Dracula, I’m always in the mood for a great gothic novel and a hopeless love story) and tried to perform some crazy rituals according to some creepypastas and questionable urban legends. The thing was that my 13 years old self had a liking for witches and she wanted to be one, so she came across this marvelous tv show going by the name of AHS Coven and it was love at first sight. Jessica Lange as Fiona Goode was simply breathtaking and I was captured by her humor and complexity... and she was a witch as well! The aftermath was me bingewatching the newest season every single October of the year.

favorite actor in 4?

Definitely Chris Colfer. His performance was outstanding as for his vocal abilities. 

which do you prefer? 1, 2 or 5?

I love 1, will always be in my heart, but it’s still relevant to me just cause of my OTP (GriffinxValtor) and the Trix, my first approach to witches. I think I’m more into 2 and waiting for the upcoming season. The 5 will always be one of my fav of all times, it did make me passionate about medicine and willing to make it my job, but it ended years ago and I watched it while I was in middle school so yeah. I’m currently watching some other series that would deserve a spot, but there was only 5.

which show have you seen more of, 1 or 3?

1 when I was a child, 3 now that I am a teen. 

if you could be anyone from 4, who would you be?

I guess Santana, i feel like we are similar, idk.

would a crossover of 3 and 4 work?

Yes. They’re both Ryan Murphy’s creation and crossover wouldn’t have been bad since there are some musical scenes scattered around AHS. Both of the series revolves a lot around pop culture, 3 it’s focused on the dark side and horror culture, while 4 it’s way lighter and all about pop music, musical world and pop personalites, but never being shallow, (it does deal with religion, omophobia, bullying and other relevant social issues), and have so well-written characters. The crossover i can think of would be set in a theater, the performers are getting ready for their debut and some crazy stuff starts happening  in AHS style. 

pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple?

IcyxSky, in some ways and after a lot of drama they could make a nice couple.

overall, which show has the better storyline, 3 or 5?

They are different, AHS doesn’t have a storyline as whole and its strongest point is the characters and their development. I’ll choose 5.

which has better theme music, 2 or 4?

It’s tie between Lucifer and Glee, you can’t pick one, both of the soundtracks are bomb, and one of them it’ kind of a musical.

Tagging: @her-majesty-wears-jeans​, if you want have fun with this, do it! 

[deathboundinautumn]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE;  Meme.

Mun & Muse

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

tagged by:   @foxcharmed​ (ily) tagging:    oof this is a longer one so ima tag only a few people @rock-you-like-a-hurricxne​, @niflheimqueen​, @tacitusauxilium​, @finalhxaven​, @dxfiedfxte​, and anyone who wants to do it, steal it from me (I wont tell if you dont ;) )

MY MUSE IS:   canon / oc / au / slightly canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated.

IS YOUR CHARACTER POPULAR IN THE FANDOM?   YES? / NO. (I’m not entirely sure? I know he’s generally well-liked in the fandom)

IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED HOT™ IN THE FANDOM?   YES / NO / IDK. (I’m pretty sure people think he is)

IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED STRONG IN THE FANDOM?   YES / NO / IDK. (Yeah he's pretty fucking strong, just most people dont use him because you only have him for like a month :/ )

ARE THEY UNDERRATED?   YES / NO / IDK. (I wouldn’t say they are.  I mean the persona 3 fandom is already small as it is and everyone seems to like him so)

WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN STORY?   YES / NO 

WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN CHARACTER?   YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG. (In vanilla game not as much but in other mediums that tell the story (which are also canon) yes they are)

ARE THEY WIDELY KNOWN IN THEIR WORLD?   YES / NO. (just a homeless orphan) 

HOW’S THEIR REPUTATION?   GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. (Depends on who you ask.  The other members of the Senpai squad would say he’s the goodest boy.  But others call him a criminal/vagrant/troublemaker and all sorts of things.  Shinji prefers his reputation to be leaning towards the bad side as he’s more likely to be left alone that way)

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?   —   I have a very very hard time breaking canon.  The big thing being his fate on Oct 4th, its very hard for me to not honor that.  I like that his story has a beginning, a middle, and an end.  I like how his sacrifice impacts the rest of the group.  I try to honor that this is what the character wanted and by not letting him have it that im cheapening his sacrifice.  That being said I do have my own headcanons about things but I would say theyre hardly canon divergent.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.   —   -pulls out homeless son from the dumpster- look at him, look at this burnt cinnamon roll.  He may be just a grumpy ol sour-puss but deep down there’s a heart of gold that can’t help but shine through.  Despite his reputation, my boy is wholesome and caring who will always go out of his way to help those in need even if he’ll deny it every time.  Just because he’s crunchy on the outside doesnt mean he aint soft on the inside. -tosses him back in the dumpster-

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).   —  Boy I sure hope you like building character relationships at a snails pace because hoo boy is it gonna take a long ass time for you to get anywhere with this boy.  Opening up? What’s that?  How to do?  He doesn’t want to get to know you or your muse.  He just wants to be left alone so he can die in peace.  Don’t bother him.

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?   —   I dunno.  I replayed Persona 3 and just really really liked him.  Been in the RP game for a few years at that point and decided, meh fuck it.  If I don’t like it, I’ll just delete.  

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?   —   His struggle is something I hold very near to me and really cut me deep and still does.  Also all of you who think of me and wanna do things with me and my interpretation of Shinjiro <3

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

DO YOU THINK YOU GIVE YOUR CHARACTER JUSTICE?   YES / NO / I SINCERELY HOPE I DO? (I believe that I do/am very confident in my portrayal)

DO YOU FREQUENTLY WRITE HEADCANONS?   YES / NO / SORT OF? (I think about them alot but seldom write them down.  Maybe I’ll start since Im actually starting to use tags to organize stuff)

DO YOU SOMETIMES WRITE DRABBLES?   YES / NO (Yep yep yep.  Somethings start as drabbles that make it into the thread (-cough the flashback of Mitsuru leaving the dorms in a thread I have going with @niflheimqueen​-))

DO YOU THINK A LOT ABOUT YOUR MUSE DURING THE DAY?   YES / NO

ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR PORTRAYAL?   YES / NO / SORT OF? (tons of praise throughout the year from the community has made me confident that my portrayal is well-liked)

ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR WRITING?   YES / NO / A LITTLE BIT. (sometimes when I’m on, I’m on.  Other times I look at my writing and am just like ‘dude find a different hobby’ but I keep on keeping on and the highs have been way better than any low ive gone through.

ARE YOU A SENSITIVE PERSON?   YES / NO. / SORTA.

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?   —   Aye if its constructive hit me.  But if you’re just hating then that’s not much use to me.

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU TO EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?   — Fuck me up with this shit

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?  — Sure, though I haven’t really had that happen before

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH YOUR PORTRAYAL, HOW WOULD YOU TAKE IT?   —  Live and let live.  Throughout the years there have been other Shinji’s out there who’s interpretation I’ve looked at and been like ‘nah this aint it chief’ but hey you know what’s real easy to do?  Not give a shit, live and let live.  So if someone didn’t agree with it, I wowuldn’t much care if they liked it or didn’t  its my interpretation and if they have a problem with it and make a point to come at me about it in a way that isn’t constructive then I’d say they have the bigger problem.

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT?  — I’d be sad because he’s a good boy.  But again, if you really dont like him that much you don’t have to interact :’)

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?   —   Ye, I make em a lot sometimes (especially if Im tired or something else).

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN?  —  I think so?   I haven’t been told that I’m not easy going and I’ve always felt very approachable.  I don’t always respond to dm’s but that’s because sometimes I’m busy but im always down to talk ooc.  It’s fun :’)

[ambitionsource]

001 for dasher!! :)

oh boy....... hoooooo boyyyyyyyyy

Dylan & Asher

When I started shipping it if I did: so if i were a viewer, i think i would like ship them from basically the moment it was made pretty clear on the show that they were romantically linked rather than just Good Pals Being Pals (i.e. “LOVE OF MY LIFE” in 103). but for a majority of s1 i think it would be a passive shipping sort of thing, like i’d love their moments and enjoy watching them, but things wouldn’t really Click into place until s2 when we really start to actually dig into them and their dynamic / their individual struggles (i.e., their promotion to regulars in s2). around 203 + 204 i’d be so locked in though, that’s probably when i’d start making fandom content or digging around for fics, and then by 207 / 208... whew y’all. whew!

My thoughts: okay so like not to be dramatic but like. im really kind of obsessed with them doe GJDSGFDKJHLFKDH. like i’m really chill about it on here for the most part, but i have not shut up about them in my gcs since quite literally like. august. there’s kind of like this whole timeline for them that doesn’t exist on the Show because its just not relevant to the story, but there’s a lot of their development as individuals and a relationship going on in the background of s2 that really informs how i write them and is really quite elaborate FDSJGLKDSG. i have an entire drive folder that’s dedicated to screenshots of the conversations we’ve had in the discord that chronicles some of this stuff. like what we fondly refer to as “4 days” which is this period between 203 and 204 in which asher became so overwhelmed with everything going on with lucas that he just dropped everything and isolated for a few days -- including closing the window on dylan; and that really has a major impact on their relationship and sort of leads to this Relationship Upgrade in the sense that they go from having the fun and easy going relationship they have in s1 to really like... committing to one another and stepping into this deeper Partnership. i can’t do it justice just talking abt it but like. again to keep it concise, i’m obsessed

What makes me happy about them: literally... so much. i will say that i think what’s really important to me about them -- as well as on the show and what they represent -- is that they really do demonstrate this like... Healthy relationship. and they don’t realize it, but they are one of the only examples of a healthy, committed, equal partnership that many of their friends have in their lives (lucas and isa, specifically). so they’re leaving this impact on people just by leading by example and just living with their hearts on their sleeves and being so unapologetically loving, and that is just... a message i want to spread far and wide. dylan and asher definitely both have their quirks and flaws, but they’re two characters who are so fundamentally driven by compassion and love in their own ways -- and then its really beautiful to watch them share that energy with one another at the most devoted level

What makes me sad about them: i mean like.......... honestly? not much. how wild is that. a pairing that doesn’t make me wanna kermit bc there’s so much angst riddled throughout.......... unreal..........

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: i firmly believe that da would be such an interesting fandom to analyze. this is because they would definitely have a strong fanbase of their own (especially post S2), but also i bet they would be victims of the “supporting pairing” in a lot of fics -- i.e., they get tagged as a pairing on ao3 but then only are featured in like 3 scenes out of a 220448328 word fic. you know, that tragedy. also annoying would be 1) dumbing down dylan or focusing only on his naivety / simplistic nature and stripping him of his incredible emotional literacy and lowkey wisdom 2) babying either of them and again stripping them of their nuances and complexities 3) exaggerating some of asher’s shrill qualities to the point that he’s just unbearable 4) ANY sort of obvious attempts to Gender their relationship -- i think zc would be able to avoid this for the most part, but i get the feeling it would be a common annoying thing in da portrayals 5) taking asher’s external hesitation towards pda / being too overtly emotional in public and reading that as either him being unaffectionate towards dylan in general or casting him as some sort of prude when in actuality i think asher is more instrumental in their Physical Relationship than one would think on the outset 6) fics where da is tagged but then its like. one of them leaving the other for lucas fDJSGDKGLFD LIKE BYEEEEEEEE

Things I look for in fanfic: on the flip side of my earlier answer, i really do believe that there would be a beautiful and dynamic da writer cohort. i think there would be some REALLY cool and lovely works out there for these two, because i know how much they’ve inspired creativity and excitement for me. i would love fics that are just about filling in missing moments to their relationship that we don’t get to see on the show just due to focus and time; i would be keen for any sort of au with them; i’d want to see portrayals of them that really highlight the balance they bring out in one another and how well they complement one another -- the ways that dylan makes up for asher’s emotional literacy and even a focus on how asher can sometimes struggle to grapple with his emotions despite being so put together in public would be A1; anything that highlights the utmost respect and adoration they have towards one another; always stan representing how touchy-feely dylan is with small affectionate touches; gold star fics would highlight their other relationships as well, both as a duo (the techie crew, dylucasher) and individually (jade x asher, dylan x isa, dylan x dave x nate, their dynamics with riley). i just..... i’m really aching for this fandom rn i tell ya!!!

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: i.......... there’s honestly not an answer. they’re asher and dylan. dylan and asher. they’re literally multiverse endorsed soulmates. there’s a mental block for alternatives sorry!

My happily ever after for them: i don’t have to worry about them so i know i’m gonna get it fDSJKGLFDG but just them continuing to have their deeply committed and supportive and emotionally healthy relationship and be there for one another as they continue to grow as people! can’t wait for them to live together college and beyond and just... thrive. i love them dearly

Who is the big spoon/little spoon: oh this has been well established. asher is the big spoon. there of course are OCCASIONAL days where it shifts (more likely during naps, for example), but when it’s time for bed they will fall asleep with asher hugging dylan and resting his head against his back. that’s The Move. it’s set in stone!

What is their favorite non-sexual activity: they spend so much time together i genuinely could say that just existing together is their activity fDJSKLGJFDKLHDh. but um they like to go on adventures with lucas; dylan will bake and asher will “help” i.e. just keep him company and steal dough; they like watching tv together (wide range from like true crime documentaries to Good TV to the classics like Spongebob to hgtv and chill fdkjhgkjdhg like. Cultured palette here folks); just spending time together but doing their own thing i.e. asher might be reading while dylan is playing nintendo switch but they’re like reclining against one another; they often take drives together and get out of the city just to listen to music and like escape the pressure of that environment; they go on trips with their families and their families even take trips together sometimes once they realize that dasher are basically tied for life (shoutout to the upcoming new years ski trip of 2019... Romance)... i could go on. there’s always much to say. i love them that’s it that’s it that’s it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

send some winter hiatus asks !! or try this one

[fleetofshippyships-archive]

Fanfic Author Meme

Tagged by @diligent-thunder and @rockmarina​ =)

Okay, so I’m me, and I talked way too much, so I’m putting this under a cut to save your dashes. You’re welcome 😘

Please do not reblog this post.

Author Name: 

Fleetofshippyships + Knowyourincantations + Legendaryroar

Fandoms You Write For: 

(in order of decreasing # of fics) Harry Potter, Voltron, Merlin, Yuri on Ice, Star Trek, Star Wars and then a few one-offs that aren’t really worth mentioning.

Where You Post: 

AO3 primarily, Tumblr, trying to post more on Pillowfort, I also post on a couple of sites for knowyourincantations

Most Popular One-Shot: 

Fleetofshippyships: Potter’s Insatiable Cock (Drarry, Explicit (duh XD), 20k (viewable only for logged-in AO3 users)).

Knowyourincantations: A Decent Start to Things (Pansmione, Teen, 7k)

Legendaryroar: Finding Time for Rest (Sheith (Voltron), Teen, 3k)

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: 

RestraintNone of my old multi-chapter fics are available to read at this time and I don’t really write multi-chapter fics anymore.

If oneshot/drabble collections or two-shots count, then:

Fleetofshippyships: Vanilla and Sweet Spices (Drarry, Explicit, 2 chapters, 20k)

and this really doesn’t count, but technically it has multiple ‘chapters’ soooooooooo

Legendaryroar: Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships (Voltron), Explicit (duh), 31 ‘chapters’, 26k)

Favourite Story You Wrote: 

I don’t think I ever have a static favourite, I’ve just written too many things, I too quickly move on to the next (and frequently forget some of my own fics exist XD), but recently I re-read In Pursuit of Red Wine (Dreville, Teen, 29k) and really enjoyed that again, and I am really attached to it cos it was my first longish rarepair fic, kind of proving to myself that I can write longer rarepair stuff. 

I also recently re-read Unburdened (Merthur (BBC Merlin), Explicit, 2k) and really enjoyed that too, had a total disconnect from having written it since it’s been so long, so I was able to read it without self-judging, and oh boy that was nice. 

I’m also quite proud of Healing What’s Left (Parkgrass, Teen, 2k) for some reason, I dunno, maybe the dark political backdrop of the fic, or maybe just cos it’s the first time I’ve written Daphne as the main character and I’m happy with the result and now have some headcanons about her rather than her being an unknown blank character to me. 

I also binge read a lot of my Voltron stuff recently and had big feels over that so....I also specifically enjoyed re-reading The Perks of Skincare (Klance (Voltron), Explicit, 3k) again cos I dunno, I like how I wrote Lance XD and also the Sheith fic I linked earlier is a fav for sure. Shiro/Rest is the ultimate OTP.

It really depends how soon after I write something or when I go back to re-read it as to what my fav is at any given time (or people commenting on it and hyping me up for it again).

Story You Were Nervous to Post: 

Everything. But most recently I was terrified out of my mind before posting: 

Friday Night by the Fire (Harry/Neville, Teen, 583 words) because I have a lot of fears about screwing up trying to write ace characters and somehow not even making that a focal point of the drabble made it even more terrifying,  No More Waiting (TianShan (19 Days), Teen, 2k) because it was a new fandom to write in, Harry Potter and the Maudlin Merman series (Drarry, Teen+ Mature, 3k +6k) due to my feelings of inadequacy because it would be better as long fic but I struggle too much with writing these days to write long fics and can only manage short things. I’d rather write this as a long fic, but then I’d never finish it so connected oneshots are the best I can do right now, but I still feel it’s not good enough and have a meltdown whenever I post one. And speaking of which, I’ve been sitting on the next one for months and should probably just fucking post it already.

Actually, most recently: Minding One’s Limits (Cho/Ginny, G rated, 1.5k), because I gave Cho a disability modeled off my fibromyalgia and wrote a scenario similar to something I’d dealt with myself, it was incredibly uncomfortable to write in the first place, and then terrifying to post, even though it’s so short. But in the end I’m proud I finally wrote about it a bit? I dunno, might take me a while to work up the nerve again though XD (also was my first time writing that ship, so there was a lot of nervousness over that too)

Oh, and I was a super ball of anxiety posting  Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships, Explicit, 31 ‘chapters’, 26k) because for almost all of those it was the first time I was writing those kinks (and some were kind of squicks for me but I wanted to see if I could write them anyway cos I’m dumb like that) and in a lot of cases those ships were completely new for me to write too, in addition to trying to write and post 1 a day, so...yeah. Also that was my first time writing tentacle and human/werewolf smut so...yeah. I was an absolute mess that month and not in a fun way. But I’m still really glad I did it, it was fun =D

In summary, I’m always an anxious mess posting anything, but most especially if it’s something I’ve not written before or is personal to me XD

How Do You Choose Your Titles: 

Most of the time I’m staring down the empty title field in AO3 cursing like a fucking sailor when I choose titles XD Sometimes it’s a line/theme/feeling from the fic. Sometimes it’s totally random and just comes to me. Sometimes I just grasp the first thing that I can no matter how stupid it sounds cos it’s been three days and I still don’t have a title and I’m over it and ready to post before I lose my nerve.

And tbh, it’s only getting harder to think of titles as my number of fics increases, and I’ve now started thinking of the perfect titles only to realise I already have a published fic by that title so....TITLES CAN DIE A FIERY DEATH

Sometimes, not so much anymore, it would turn out that I would give a wip doc a name just so I’d know what it was, sometimes as a joke with whoever was reading it and cheerleading while I wrote it, and then I would refer to it by that and think of it as that so much that when it came time to actually give the fic a title, it was too late and I could not think past that stupid file name, and that’s how Potter’s Insatiable Cock happened, and how I very nearly called a Merthur fic Arthur’s Wanking Tower (saved that one at the last moment thank god cos the tone of that fic is actually really serious and emotional and wtf was I even thinking with that file name and actually I linked to that fic above XD it ended up being called Unburdened). 

Potter’s Insatiable Cock slipped through cos it’s actually relevant to the fic content and I could live with it.

But needless to say, I don’t give my wip docs joke names anymore XD

Do You Outline: 

Only if I never want to actually write the idea...once I outline, it’s over. I can’t write to a detailed plan. It stifles me. I’ll always get stuck having to try and think ahead to the plan, and then I lose the flow and nothing works because I’m a pantser/intuitive/instinctive writer not a planner. Sometimes I jot down ideas but in like, the vaguest of ways, usually more focused on emotional development than actual scenes or events or anything because then I won’t be able to write it (and I rarely stick to those vague ideas anyway). 

I can really only write when I’m staring down a blank doc with no idea where it’s going and discover it as I go (which is why writing is so fun for me). I can only finish a fic if I don’t think too hard about what’s going to happen next and just let it happen as I write. 

This of course means that editing is a fucking bitch when I finish anything, beginnings often get totally re-written, but if I plan, it just doesn't happen at all, so I’ll take the extra editing if it means I manage to write something.

I do have a lot of detailed plotty fic idea outlines...and I mourn them cos I’m never going to write them now, but they’re so goooooooooood XD

Complete: 

Online (across all 3 accounts): 381 (incl. my hidden drarry fics as they are technically online just hidden, not incl. individual oneshots/drabbles in collection ‘fics’, of which there are ridiculously many). Offline: 20 (I have the worst habit of just sitting on completed fics and I really need to stop)

In-Progress: 

Too many to name, last time I counted it was ~60 but that wasn’t even including my vld wips so...I don’t actually know. I hoard wips and just switch up what I work on all the time depending on mood/interest levels/effort required. 

Current main focuses are a 50k+ plotty Drarry (*fingerscrossed* cos this is my first time seriously attempting something long (will probably reach 80k at least) in a very long time and I put it down for a few months and thought that was it but then I picked it up again recently, yay!), and re-writing some hidden fics I can’t put them back up in the quality they’re in, I just can’t guys, they’re awful.

I’ve been thinking a lot about working on the longish 8th year Pansmione fic I started for the wlw big bang before I had to pull out of cos stupid life stuff. I might pick that up again for a bit too, couldn’t be more different from the Drarry one so it’d make a nice focus break =)

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: 

I don’t even plan fics I’m writing, I sure don’t plan ahead to stuff I haven’t even started XD The only think I can think of for this category would be me re-writing my hidden long Drarry fics.

Oh, and there will be a Merthur oneshot coming (hopefully) soon, because @april-thelightfury115​ won my custom fic giveaway with a merthur idea. Just waiting for my brain to cooperate so I can start that and not suck XD but I’m so fucking excited to write some Merthur again, you have no idea.

Oh, and lots more Sapphic September drabbles coming too, I’m way behind and only just posted day 11 cos this month is literal hell for me, but I am still planning on finishing the prompt list, no matter how long it takes, but no plan for those, not even which ships, I just sit down with the next prompt and a blank doc and see what happens.

Do You Accept Prompts: 

Yes, I love writing to prompts, I’m take them via google form here, but I’m in such a bad space with my health I’ve been really struggling with writing lately, managed to do a bit of editing (fuck knows how), but writing new stuff is so hard, so there’s a long wait while I wait for my fibro fog to ease off to the point I can write new stuff with more regularity (and less stupid errors I have to edit out later).

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: 

Again, I so don’t plan. But I really want to be making more progress on the long plotty drarry wip I’m trying to write. I’m still not sure I’ll have the guts to post it even if I do finish it, given its subject matter (it would make a great careers or consent fest fic tbh), but damn I’m really excited by it. Not sure I can maintain it being plotty and not revert to focusing on the relationship (which is easier for me), but I can only try and see what happens. (trying to write a non-relationship plot without planning is a nightmare but I don’t have a choice if I want to write it at all XD)

I’m also now excited for my longish pansmione wip too actually, just because it’s already longer than my Dreville long-ish fic and it’s exciting and scary to do longer rarepair stuff. I’m way out of my comfort zone with the fic itself, but I dunno, I re-read some recently and fell in love with it all over again, like, flustered lesbian-awakening, disaster for Pansy (but sure she still hates her) Hermione? YES PLEASE! and also, I am guilty of not writing female characters as much as I should because, well, canonically, they don’t have much depth and I’m very meh about them, but in this there’s a huge focus on them because they’re all determined to band together for 8th year and Hermione is making friends with them (Parvati is like, dragging her along all the time XD) where she once dismissed them so it’s scary but exciting =D I’m getting more practice with all the sapphic I do over on knowyourincantations, so I feel more confident working on this wip now =D

I’m also kind of excited about re-writing my old long fics, because they’re all 3 years old now, and my writing tastes (and skill, yikes) have totally changed, so it’s like I’m writing the story again but how I would write it now while maintaining the overall same plot, so it’s really interesting, like discovering the story all over again. Like in one (Making Malfoy Blush) I’ve gone as far as introducing a new side character to replace another’s parts because I no longer feel those parts are in character for them. It’s super terrifying, but it’s fun at the same time =) it’ll take me forever to do these though, so I dunno about ‘upcoming’ really, I only chip away every now and then when I’m unable to write new stuff but am still coherent enough to do something.

Eh, it is what it is, I can’t write like I used to, hence me being inactive more than active these days, but I’m trying to work within my new limitations instead of getting frustrated with them and just giving up entirely =)

---

Now, who to tag....I think anyone I would tag has already done it, and if not..I blame the fog if I’m forgetting someone obvious, if you wanna do it just say I tagged you so I can be nosy and take a look =)

Again, please do not reblog this post

[greetingfromthedead]

Loki - Even in Death

Reader gender: Neutral

Summary: Thor wasn’t the only one to survive after Thanos’ attack on the ship and now you have just one mission in mind.

Author’s note: Hello! Maybe someone still remembers me… I’m the shitty Marvel writer. It’s been quite a while since I last wrote something. This is somewhat all over the place and is a bit longer than my usual stuff, but it’s just something that got stuck in my head. Plus I just really didn’t want to study for my exams :D

Author’s note 2 (rant): So apparently something has changed in the way Tumblr decides to show tags in searches. I can’t add any pictures to this text (I loved using special dividers + I always added a relevant picture), I also can’t link to anything (like my masterlist or tagging information). Basically Tumblr is just making it harder for me to like it anymore as it just limits my creativity.

***

You still hear the alarm ringing throughout the spaceship as you guide the Asgardians to the escape pod. Women and children are running for their life to get off this ship as something much bigger and very hostile looms over all of you.

The escape pod is filled to the prim, but half of the people are still on the main ship. You look with panic and worry, at the people who won’t fit into the pod and decide to do your best to protect them. You go up to Valkyrie and take her hand.

“Get these people as far away from here as possible, keep them safe.” you say and also look at Korg behind her. “Stay with them, they have to live.”

“Come with us. There aren’t many warriors amongst us, help us keep them safe.” Valkyrie demands, but you just shake your head.

“I have to try and fight here so maybe we get to live another day, these people here don’t deserve to die. Now stop wasting time and go.” your voice ice cold as you let go of her hand and push the release button next to the pod. It closes its doors and prepares to release from the main ship. With a heavy heart you watch them go knowing very well that everyone remaining on this ship is very likely going to die, including you… and Loki.

You draw your black bladed sword and make your way through the crowd who has fallen completely silent. You can hear fighting in the main hall behind the metal doors. You raise your weapon and are ready to strike. Just a moment later the doors open and a strange pale face greets you with the slightest hint of a smile.

“There you are,” the smooth voice says.

You sarge in with full force, but the figure just waves with his hand and metal wires from the ceiling bend and quickly wrap you up even covering your mouth. Your sword falls to the ground as you are pulled against a wall with no hope of escaping.

One by one the figure starts killing the people you swore to protect. You couldn’t watch this blood bath and nobody could hear your muffled screams over the panicked and afraid shouting. You close your eyes, but the noise alone is enough to make you want to vomit.

When the deed is done the figure walk out the door leaving you alone alive. You can hear voices talking somewhere in the distance, but the shouts of the wounded and the afraid are gone, meaning that they are all dead. Your face is wet with tears of grief. You don’t try to listen for the voices, you know everyone’s fate is already sealed.

Suddenly and without warning the wires holding you back loosen and you fall to the ground. You pick up your sword and run out the doors. You see glowing purple cracks appear all around you. Purple flames engulf your surroundings as you make it to the main hall. The last thing you can see before the ship blows to pieces is Thor crying over the body of his brother.

***

The sun shines brightly over the green fields, the river can barely be heard over the sound of blades clashing together.

“You have all your little tricks, but I’m still better than you,” you tease.

“You seem so sure about that,” the says as he pulls out two knives out of thin air and charges at you again, but you deflect his attack and even smack him lightly in the face with your free hand. Suddenly you are surrounded by an army of Lokis and you look around trying to find the real one.

“Your projections can’t hurt me, I just have to stab every single one of them until I find the real you,” you smile.

“Yes, but in the mean time I can sneak up on you,” his voice whispers in your ear as he wraps his arms around you.  You let your sword fall to the ground and you turn around. He places his hands on your neck and kisses you. His lips leave a burning trace down your neck.

Suddenly you knock him over, he loses his balance and falls.

“You fight dirty,” he says with a hint of admiration.

“You already knew that,” you smile.

You push him on his back before sitting on him and kissing him, stroking your fingers through his hair.

***

You wake up on a lumpy bed, your body hurts as you sit up. You look at your damaged armour and everything is covered in ash and blood. You look around and see that you are on a spaceship. Everything starts to flood back to you, the image of your dead love burned into your eyelids.

You get up and limp to the door of the little windowless room. To your surprise it is open and you walk down the hall till you get to a big room. There is no furniture there, but on the floor there are uneven lumps covered with fabric and you realise these must be the fallen Asgardians. You look at the rows of bodies and are reminded of your grief. You can’t bare to look anymore so you turn around and head for the exit, but suddenly there’s a loud whistle. You see a Yaka Arrow hovering in front of your face.

“Who are you?” a voice asks.

“Y/n, an Asgardian warrior,” you say.

“What happened to your people?”

“They were murdered.”

“By who?”

“Thanos,” you almost growl that name.

You turn around and see a scruffy looking man.

“Who are you?”

“My name’s Kraglin,” the man answers.

“Thank you.”

“What for?”

“For giving the dead some decency and for saving me.”

“Well, you did almost join them and I couldn’t just leave them there. I just wish I were closer when I received the distress call.”

He whistles again and the arrow flies to him.

“You’ve already done so much for me, but I have to ask a little more. Do you have an escape pod I could borrow? I will repay you.”

***

“Oh, did I offend you, my prince?” you ask in a serious manner.

“Yes, very much, my dear.” His expression looks stern, but you can see through it, you see the actual joking kindness he has towards you.

“Then I’m very sorry, your highness,” you bow and laugh.

Loki takes your hands and with a smile he pulls you closer. He places his right hand on your waste. His fingers play with yours for a moment before intertwining. Loki leads as the two of you slow dance to a melody sounding from far in the distance.

“I wish it could stay like this forever,” you sigh, “Where our biggest trouble is me stealing the last pastry from under your nose.”

“Why do you think it can’t stay like this?” Loki asks as he looks at your expression.

“Because I can feel a war coming.”

***

You wake up  in the small spacecraft you had stolen after getting denied by the Xandarian. Looking around in the small space you can tell that this was stolen before you got your hands on it.

Your body still aches from your injuries, but there’s no time to lose. You had already set your course and you can see that you are getting close. In just a couple more hours you find the gateway to the Lost Lands and land at the Sinner’s Market. You get out of your spacecraft and venture through the crowded streets. All kinds of creatures are here to sell you their sinister goods, but you had only one goal so you find the little storefront and walk in. You are greeted by all kinds of potions and magical trinkets. The blue skinned storekeeper smiles a toothless grin as he sees you.

“Do you have what we discussed?” you ask in his native tongue.

He takes two small vials from under the table and hands them to you.

“And this will work?” You demand as you look at the little potions.

“Most likely.”

“You are in luck today as “most likely” will have to do,” you say as you place a bag of money on the counter before leaving.

***

You lay in his arms. Loki’s hands holding yours. He moves his head closer till his lips are by your ear.

“I still think we should leave. I still think you should marry me.” he whispers.

You feel your heat ache. This is the second time he has brought this up after the big proposal.

“You know I can’t. You know why,” you say with sadness.

“Because you are part of the Asgardian elite force? There’s a simple solution - leave with me. You are my only light in this life. You hate this hell as much as I do. Let’s just leave, we could concur all of the nine realms and the rest of the multiverse and call it ours if we wanted to.”

“I hate the throne, I hate the politics, but I gave an oath to protect the people. They have done nothing to harm me and if protecting them means I cannot wed, so be it. A big ceremony doesn’t affect my love for you. Does it for you?” you turn your head to look at him.

“No, it doesn’t. I will love you the same. No matter what happens.” He gives you a kiss on the cheek.

***

You let your ship just drift in the fast emptiness of space as you sit on your chair and look at the vial in your hand. You take the cap off before putting it on your lips and drinking the sweet liquid. You feel the poison taking it’s toll on your body. You feel everything in you struggle, but the potion stretches out to every nook and cranny inside you and everything fades to black as it shuts you down.

You find yourself in a field. The long grass swaying in the wind. The sky of Valhalla painted with gold and rose colours. You are alone if it wasn’t for one other person. You take a step closer.

“My love?” you call out to the figure and Loki turns around.

“No, you can’t be here,” he comes closer, “Not so soon, you can’t be dead too.”

You approach him and stretch out your arms to hug him, but there’s a wall between the two of you.

“It’s not your time yet, it cannot be,” he says.

“Don’t worry, it is not. I just had to be sure you’re here,” you smile as you look into his brilliant eyes.

You feel a force pulling you away again, pulling you away from the wall, from your love.

“I will see you again, I promise,” you say before finding yourself back in your spacecraft.

The poison had brought you close enough to death to visit the land of the fallen, but now it retreats again until it is nothing more than just an empty feeling in your stomach.

***

You walk behind your spacecraft and open the storage compartment. You drag out the Asgardian. You push him back down when he tries to stand.

“Why? What have I done to you?” the man says not looking up at you.

“You are a murderer, a thief, and a traitor,” you say.

“Odin pardoned me after I acted as a spy for him,” he says, you hear the terror in his voice.

“Odin is dead, Asgard has fallen, half of our people were killed. Rules don’t apply anymore. And you have not earned forgiveness.”

You take the top of of the other potion you had brought with you from the Sinner’s market and force the criminal to drink it.

“Please, no, let me live,” he begged.

But you simply take your dagger and slit his throat. The man’s lifeless body falls to the ground with a thump and as his body turns into golden shimmer, but it changes colour to be green before disappearing. In it’s place a golden shimmering portal appears. and Loki steps through the gateway back into the realm of the living. He seems aghast as he looks at his hands. Then he turns his attention to you, he reaches out to touch you.

“Is this real?” he strokes your cheek.

“I did give you a promise,” you smile as you place your hand on his.

Loki steps closer and embraces you, kissing the top of your head and then pulling away just to kiss your lips.

“But how?” he asks.

“I damned an Asgardian soul to a eternity in Hel,” you say remembering the man you had killed just moments ago.

“I love you more than anything,” he says, his voice heavy with emotion.

“Then let’s get married,” you smile.

He still holds you, but suddenly it feels as if your stomach dropped, an uneasiness takes over and gives you just enough time to ask:

“My love…?”

You don’t get to finish asking if he feels it too, if he knows what’s happening. You just turn into dust in his arms and all Loki can do is watch in horror as the wind blows your remains away.

***

Sadly I can’t link to my masterlist here or the post won’t show up in search, but you can find it on blog page.

***

Taglist

@spookycatqueen @jdm-is-dad @kbarnes-2001 @thefallenbibliophilequote @honey-anon @chris-evans-teamcap @justaplainfangirl @obsessed--with

[comicteaparty]

June 24th-June 30th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from June 24th, 2019 to June 30th, 2019.  The chat focused on Drugs & Wires by Mary Safro & Io Black.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Drugs & Wires by Mary Safro & Io Black~! (https://www.drugsandwires.fail/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until June 30th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. Who do you think made the Worm and for what reason? Why does it seem to mostly be affecting Stradania and not other places? Do you think Dan’s implant can ultimately be fixed, or is he stuck forever away from VR?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 4. What aspect of the world’s cyberpunk setting interests you the most and why? Alternatively, what aspect are you hoping to see explored a bit more in regards to how it affects the characters?

RebelVampire

1) Gonna be a bit depressing when I say the bridge scene where Dan almost threw himself off it. Which I'm gonna spoiler tag the rest of this just as a suicide trigger warning precaution. I was 100% right there in the moment with him during that scene. Like I understood why he'd arrived at that conclusion, and it didn't come off as patronizing as I feel a lot of similar suicide scenes often do in comics. This is a man who even I felt really had nothing to live for, as sad as that is to say. Not that I wanted Dan to die, of course, but I get absolutely why he would. And then when he's saved, I liked that he is angry about it. Cause that is a dark reality I feel too many comics shy away from. And just all that gritty realism really hit me in the heart. 2) I don't know who made the worm and I don't think it matters all that much. Rather, I think the reason is more important, and the reason I think is to either kill VR or draw attention to Dan's shitty country. Which I kind of want to believe the latter, that this is somehow politically motivated. Or even if its the former, the idea is to get ppl more politically involved. That being said, I do think it's someone in Stradania who made it. As for Dan's implant being fixed, I don't think so. I don't think he'll be let off the hook that easy, and that he will continue to have to face his awful world for what it is, garbage and all.

3) Dan because he is the delicious epitome of a flawed protagonist. He's not mean, but between his drug problems, his crappy attitude towards most people, and so forth, he's got some real issues to work through. But that's great, cause at least that makes the few steps forward he's taken more satisfying. Since he's not getting those steps easy. He has to basically crawl through metaphorical lava to gain even 2 cm. 4) I really like the world's integration of VR and cybernetics. Like it's not on the level it's just there, but there's businesses around it, slang around it, and so forth. It's presented as this super ingrained culture thing, and that is super hard to play off. And it's just really well-done to see all the ways that those aspects bleed into their lives, whether the invention was intended to do so in that way or not.

Historical Jesus

I'm about to catch up. gimmy some time

RebelVampire

itll be going for the rest of the week, so theres no rush.

snuffysam

1) My favorite scene is the basement wake. It's a cool way to introduce those side characters (especially Vlad), and we were shown how our protagonist is seen through other people's eyes.

Like, we as the readers get to see Dan's struggles first-hand, but seeing the way Dan's "friends" think of him as a mindless junkie is really eye-opening

Re-reading the wake chapter made me think of something regarding question (2). Rebel, you suggested that the worm may have been made to kill VR. Could the reverse be true instead? Vlad has this speech about how the victims of the worm are martyrs, and the rest of the cast groans... but maybe he's not so far off.(edited)

My favorite character is Lin. On the surface, she's a terrible, shady person, but she's got heart where it counts! (in a trunk with a bunch of other organs)

Though I also really like Dan, for the same reasons as Rebel. He starts off in such a terrible place, and watching him take baby steps towards improvement is... honestly, uplifting, even if he does sometimes take some big steps backward.(edited)

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite illustration in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?

QUESTION 6. Do you think Dan will manage to find Eve again? If so, how might that affect him? Further, what do you think Dan’s past history is in general with his family and others that might play a role in the story?

Historical Jesus

Is the person writing this comic Russian

RebelVampire

cant speak for Io, but while not from Russia, Mary does speak Russian

Historical Jesus

SHe might have had family immigrate from Russia. This story just feels very Russian in the sense that everyone is down on their luck

But yeah. This story is freaking great!

Cryo

Hey, Mary here! I'm a Russian from Latvia, Io's German but I usually consult him on any Russian bits we have in the comic : D thanks so much for reading, loved seeing all the replies so far!

Historical Jesus

It's you

@Cryo Do you have experience with information security or bug hunting?(edited)

I mean, you sound like you REALLY understand hacker culture(edited)

Historical Jesus

ok I finished

1: Favorite scene? Hard to tell honestly. I like them all for different reasons. It's the continuum of the story I appreciate. The fact I'm always wanting to see what happens next? 2: Who made the worm. I've noticed that people who were infected had illegal copies of software. From a cybersecurity perspective, worms only work when either (A) someone finds a vulnurability that has never before been seem or (B) people don't update their shit for whatever reason. Hence why most software schedules mandatory updates. This could just be the inevitable conclusion to using pirated or older software. 3: Favorite character: Dan. I can relate to him the most. I don't do party drugs, just psycodelics.

4: Favorite aspect of cyberpunk. Historical relevance. In our past, rulers were privileged to rule because humans believed they were "ordained by God" to rule. European philosophers then said that the right to rule belongs to those who become the height of natural selection/ The premise being that there is no god and that we are "free agents" with "free will." No one is entitled to anything unless they produce something of value. This made perfect sense when manual labor was relevant and everything had to be done by hand. This includes pen and paper math. Hence why pay is exclusively based on labor value. Enter the age of technology fucked this up. Capitalism today is STUPIDLY efficient. We WHOOPED natural selections ass. We also learned that humans can't simply "change their outlook at will." Humans are mortal and are not much different than machines. The have needs and all that pesky human stuff. Some people could argue that healthier people have more free will than others, but poverty is the inevitable conclusion to this "free will" "labor value" mindset. But people think principles are sacred and set in stone. So what we are seeing is devalued labor and everyone becoming more poor and the formation of corporate oligarchies and dependences. Cyberpunk was WAY ahead of it's time in seeing this. We need to revisit this genre because I sure as shit don't want to live under a global illuminati with hard line cultural segregation.(edited)

Cryo

No, no real hacking experience here, I'm a 3d modeller by trade. We do our research when we can but our readers are a lot more technically minded than we are :p

Historical Jesus

I love 3D modeling

Attila Polyák

I'll be totally honest your work didn't really catch me at first, but I kept reading. Aaaaand dang that was a good decision. This is genuinely well made. I'm only at the end of chapter 4 but that bridge scene was great. I'm pretty sure it'll be my favourite scene but I need to read the rest first.

Historical Jesus

I have one of two options in life. Make high detailed models to sell on Gumroad or make comics. Gumroad will require constant adaptation to new software, but I already have my comic story structure fgiured out

Cryo

@Attila Polyák thanks for giving us a chance! Hope you enjoy the rest ( though chapter 5 is a lot less dramatic in comparison!)

Historical Jesus

Do you have a resolution in mind or are you just making it as you go?

Cryo

Yeah, we know where we're taking the story, but how it gets there can vary. Lots of the scenes we wrote years ago have to be tweaked or redone entirely to work

Historical Jesus

If the "free will" capitalist have their way, then we can expect the future to look very similar. Lots of poor people using lots of old tech. All software and hardware is closed sourced and locked down.The division between rich and poor will be larger than ever. Many of the zero days will be state sponsored much like they are now and they can use this to legally infect people and categorize them and use their own information against them if they ever become a threat to the state or the rich tech oligarchy

When I read this I got sense of creepy forcasting

More kids are playing with the Linux Kernal than smoking cigarettes so we might be ok

Historical Jesus

5: Favorite illustration? Anything that involved gif animations. That's not to say it should be overused but it was used at the right time

6a: Will Dan find Eve again? Probably. Since Cryo has a conceptual end in mind, I imagine she serves a key purpose in the plot. If they don't then it's likely that their actions will effect each other in some way.(edited)

6b: What is Dan's history with his parents? Let's look at who Dan is now. He's a poor drug addict who has had a dead end job. Yet he is not an overly angry person. Just depressed. He hangs around computer poetry people and other drug people. As a person who has experience with drugs, I noticed three types of people who do the dangerous drugs. At least in the US. They are... -People who have had repressive or needlessly strict parents. Thus overdoing drugs becomes associated with freedom and eventually a point of rebellion. But you can do too many of them. -People who are poor and need to sell them because they are poor. Naturally many of them do the drugs themselves so they naturally become addicted. -People who's parents are drug users themselves. The people who teach are schools will tell you it's that "people are trying to be cool" and it has nothing to do with that. Truth be told, they are hiding something. There is also a lot of dark racial history behind enhancing substances and the law and that can influence people's decision to take them, but I don't want to get into that because I don't want to get booted from this server.(edited)

Historical Jesus

Actually, @Cryo, would you be willing to give us a brief personal biography? Also, if you are, then can you tell us about your parents, what they did for a living, and the income situation you had growing up.(edited)

Why am I asking this? I think we can come up with more interesting answers about the comic if we know YOU as a person and how that influences your writing. I was able to infer that this story sounded Russian as fuck. Since the setting was Russian, I figured you were either from there or had family there

We can give more interesting answers that can help you come up with more interesting writing

RebelVampire

@Historical Jesus Your questions are getting a little personal, and while I understand the logic behind them, keep in mind we're here to discuss the comic and not the creators' personal lives.

keii4ii

Yeah... I feel even if the creators are okay with discussing it, this stuff is best left to DM

Historical Jesus

I understand. I would like to give her the choice. If she chooses not to then I understand. Biologically speaking, I think art is meant to be personal.

keii4ii

(and of course, if they don't want to discuss it, no one should pressure them about it )

RebelVampire

yeah if @Cryo wants to answer that's fine. Just for the future please keep those sorts of questions to a minimum and watch the wording on them. Cause that statement did sound overly pressure filled.

Historical Jesus

of course

keii4ii

I don't think we should be getting further into this territory?

RebelVampire

Agreed. This isn't a really appropriate topic for #week_long_bookclub, @Historical Jesus and has little to do with the comic.

Historical Jesus

I understand. I'm trying to demonstrate the the relevance and the benefits of understanding the author as a person. And again, it's her choice to choose what she discloses.

RebelVampire

And again, I get the logic. But just not appropriate for this discussion.

Historical Jesus

fair enough. I just want it to be known

I rephrased the question so it's less assertive. I apologies, I suck with social skills. Hopefully by the time she reads it, then it will be more inviting for her.

RebelVampire

thats better wording for sure, thank you.

Historical Jesus

no problem

art was definitely designed to be personal. The reason why a lot of big budget art feels bland is because it's meant for everyone and they have to not get too deep into offending people. Because it has to make money. That requires the work of a true genius. D&W is specialized and it will attract a certain group of people. Mostly people who value anonymous culture like myself. Or so I imagine.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?

QUESTION 8. Will Lin actually go through with her plan to get into politics? If so, do you believe she can actually make a difference? What obstacles do you think she might run into, and do you think Dan will be of any help to her?

Cryo

(i would appreciate not having to talk about my life and anyones political beliefs neither here nor in DMs, thanks for understanding)(edited)

Historical Jesus

Understood

Historical Jesus

7: Dan, primarily because he is relatable. He would interact the way I would. Not having money sucks.

Historical Jesus

8: Will in go into politics? Probably not. She strikes me as a neroatypycal character. I could be wrong though.

RebelVampire

@snuffysam If the worm was designed to improve VR, I really want to meet the person who decided that making ppl martyrs was the way to go. Cause that's some backwards thinking, imo at least XD

5) There's a lot of really great ones, but I'm kind of fond of the illustration of Dan puking up rainbows. It's this cool mix of gross, psychedelic, and not what I expected. It expressed a lot of mood somehow for something that's less grand than I usually pick. 6) I think Dan will find Eve again, if only cause from a technical perspective she was introduced super early on to not be important. However, I think meeting her again is just gonna make him feel bad about himself as he realizes how little his baby steps of improvement are. In regards to his family, just gonna be bold and say my theory: his dad is part of that political group that took control and really hates cyborgs and technology and all that. Thus they were probably not the most open-minded and rejected Dan in multiple ways both through emotional abuse and neglect.

7) I like seeing Dan and Troy right now. Everyone else in the comic is kind of...shitty towards Dan. Like i know Dan isn't the greatest person, but I would hate to be in the situation where I'm constantly being told I'm a junkie who won't amount to anything. Which I mean don't get me wrong, those are interesting interactions. But Troy? Troy is this new person whose only experience with Dan is kind of a nice if not high tension one. Troy comes with a fresh, no prior knowledge of Dan perspective, and I think that's really interesting and gonna be a good way to shed new light on Dan's more positive traits. 8) I think Lin will try to go through with it, but I think Lin is fighting a losing game. Short of stuffing the ballot, I don't think those she's trying to help will vote for her. Instead they'll just bitch and be complacent to the world around them. But on that same vain, Lin probably could just stuff the ballots to win. I umm...honeslty don't think Dan can help her in anyway. Dan is really busy helping himself to suck less at the moment. XD

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What sorts of art or story details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?

QUESTION 10. What do you think Sandman and Fixer will find in regards to the Worm as the story continues, and what does the VR cafe Sandman has been hacking have to do with anything? How will Nate tie into this given he’s looking for Fixer?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.

QUESTION 12. Overall, what role do you think Troy will have within the story? Additionally, how will she get out of her situation with having no ID, money, or much in the way of people she knows?

Historical Jesus

9: The art against the web design literally looks like something we would see at Def Con

10: I image he has a lead. After all his motivation is revenge

11: it’s strength is that it's good at making people empathize with characters even if you can't relate to them

12: I don't think Troy will get out of her situation. If she comes back to the states empty handed she will be fired. It might be in her best interest to get wrapped up in finding the worm programmer

Typically speaking large scale worms are state sponsored but it's not clear how far this thing actually spreads.

RebelVampire

9) My favorite details so far have been the small things in the background. Like the random graffiti on the walls, the cracks and dilapidation of the buildings, all the small do-dads in Lin's place. Like none of that needs to be there to create a complete background, but it adds so much character to the setting and each character. So I really appreciate the extra mile taken for that. 10) I think Sandman and Fixer are gonna find that some corporation or someone high up on some food chain made it on purpose. As for the VR cafe? Honestly, I think it's a red herring and Sandman is making an excuse to target them just cause he hates them. As for Nate, I think Nate is gonna join the investigation team but also kind of serve as a negotiator between Fixer and Dan. Cause I don't think those two will get along without help.

11) I think this comic's strengths are a) the setting both visually and story wise, as it's a really strong and vivid setting. then b) Dan. It is very, very hard to write a character like Dan. There are so many things he does that could immediately make him unlikeable, what between the drugs, self destruction, and general assholeness to some of the ppl around him. but yet he is likeable. you do want to see him succeed and not suffer. yet you also still can acknowledge hes unreliable. its a great dynamic that lesser writing could not pull off. 12) I think Troy is gonna be their viewport into the corporate world. Which I think will play a role since there is a themeing here about evil corporations. Plus, she at least knows some stuff better than they do, as she already showed off at the VR cafe. But getting out of it? Nope. Shes stuck and probably gonna make another panicked call to Dan at some point. And Dan will be an angel and help again.

snuffysam

I'm going to go out on a limb here. Not only will Lin go through with running for office, she'll win. And she won't even have to stuff the ballot that much. But... I'm not sure her fight will be over there. After all, there's more than just one corrupt person in the country. I agree with you on the investigation into the Worm, @RebelVampire . I think someone up the corporate ladder is responsible. With that said, I don't think Sandman is targeting the VR cafe for nothing. I think he's trying to draw more attention to their security flaws for... some reason. I guess to get more people involved in investigating? I doubt he foresaw Troy showing up and offering to upgrade the cafe's machines though, so I that probably isn't part of his plan. I think a major part of Dan's character arc going forward will be accepting that he doesn't need Eve. Like, accepting that he doesn't need her help to get better, and that he's the only one he needs to prove his progress to.

Dan's character writing is absolutely my favorite part of this comic. In a weaker comic, I would absolutely hate how a self-destructive character like Dan is portrayed. Like, often characters with addiction/other mental health problems in fiction come off as unlikeable, or too cartoonish, or too depressingly stagnant (at least, from what I've seen in other works of fiction). But Drugs & Wires strikes a great balance where character progression isn't always linear, and isn't always positive, but it's there, and that fluidity makes you want to root for him more each chapter.

Attila Polyák

Now that I finally read all of it... 1, The bridge scene at the end of chapter 4, that was really done. 2, Dan's implant... I'm pretty sure it can be fixed, but I have doubts if Dan will ever have the resources to have it fixed. As a matter of fact I feel like he'll never have the money or influence to have it fixed and the way it is he can't really replace it either, so... He's probably stuck without VR. 3, Lin! She's awesome! 4, Probably the grey market implant dealers, even though that's kinda bog standard cyberpunk stuff. :) 6, Yes, they will probably meet again. And yes, I do feel like we'll need to see more of Dan't past history especially about how he got involved in... well in everything that's his current life. 7, Nagy, as surreally odd, is a great addition to Dan. Like at times I thought his absurdity would actually help Dan. 8, Ofc she will, you don't forge that much "voter trust" for nothing. And Dan, tho probably seemingly unwillingly, will likely help her one way or another.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

QUESTION 14. Do you think Dan will ever be able to kick his drug habit, or will he continue to fall back into it forever? How will this affect his relationships? Further, how will his habits shape his future role in the story?

RebelVampire

13) I'm looking forward to getting more info about the worm. Cause right now I dont feel any more knowledgeable than I did at the start, and I'm itching to see Sandman, Fixer, or Dan to somehow get a bigger clue to what's going on. 14) I think both will apply. In that Dan will kick the habit eventually but will always be at risk because addiction is not really something you just completely cure. It's a battle he'll have for his entire life, even if he learns to manage it. As for for his relationships, I don't think it'll have much affect, tbh. Maybe things with Lin will improve, maybe Eve. But everyone else is kind of a jerk who already writes him off. Dan is in need of a fresh start somewhere far away.

Historical Jesus

13: Same here. I would like to know more about the worm. I hope that Cyro puts a cool technical characteristic into the worms behavior so that creates interesting and unique challenges for the characters 14: Statistically speaking most people do not kick their drug habit's. Especially not in the position he is in. Based on the story's cultural nature, I doubt the ending will be happy. But I am sure it will be interesting

Cryo

Thanks so much for picking and reading our comic this week! I've had a great time reading all the replies, especially since we don't hear from new readers often, and it's gonna come in handy when we get back into writing more stuff for the comic.

snuffysam

I had a great time reading it, Cryo!

Io.Black

Just wanted to add my own thanks to everybody who took the time to read and comment this past week. As a writer, it’s always incredibly valuable to get a sense of what people are taking away from your work, as well as where they think it’s headed.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Drugs & Wires this week! Please also give a special thank you to Mary Safro & Io Black for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Drugs & Wires, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://www.drugsandwires.fail/

Drugs & Wires’ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/drugsandwires

Drugs & Wires’ Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/Cryodraws

Drugs & Wires’ Merch: https://www.hellovoid.online/

Safro’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/marysafroart

Io Black’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/b_iologic

[littlehollyleaf]

a personal assessment of the future of nygmobblepot

(eh it’s all over my dash, thought I’d join the party - but this is really about organising my personal thoughts/feelings, YMMV).

So as my various tags and posts have shown, my gut feeling about Ed’s behaviour on the dock was that he was protesting too much in his claim that he didn’t love Oswald and wanted him to suffer and die - that the SUBTEXT of that scene and Ed’s revenge plot was that he DID have feelings for Oz (supported by the parallel between Ed and Lee).

Now subtext is subtext - if you can argue it with sufficient evidence then IT’S THERE NO MATTER WHAT, Word of God and authorial intent be damned, so I will continue to read Ed’s character and this plot with that subtext in mind thank you very much.

But when it comes to speculating on the future of a WIP story... then things get a little tricky and Word of God becomes potentially relevant and...

Well, this reads to me like BOTH Cory AND Robin are taking Ed’s words on the dock completely at face value:

[X] [X] [X] [X]

Because ‘zero question about the sincerity of each character’s wants’ is CRAZY BOLD - it’s claiming that Ed and Ozzie’s feelings were made 100% explicit and clear by what happened in this one episode.

Which is a real positive for OZ in terms of queer rep, so I can understand why Robin is so supportive - he and Cory are stating here, categorically, that Ozzie’s words and actions throughout the episode are HARD EVIDENCE that PROVE that OZZIE’S ROMANTIC LOVE FOR ED IS 100% REAL (hence the phrasing ‘sincerity of’ - I think that’s Cory addressing the upset over Ozzie’s feelings having been in doubt and trying to be reassure people that it is now clear that Ozzie’s love is sincere).

But for Ed - I know there’s been some debate over it, but can’t see this as meaning anything other than Cory and Robin claiming that the episode was also INCONTESTABLE PROOF that ED IS STRAIGHT AND DOES NOT LOVE OZ (because if Cory did mean something like ‘Ed is repressed/in denial and believes he is straight now, when really he isn’t, as will be revealed later’ then there wouldn’t be ‘zero question’ as to Ed’s feelings, there would be MUCH QUESTION as to Ed’s feelings, you know?).

...sooooo, it does rather seem to me that from Cory and Robin’s perspective, nygmobblepot simply is unrequited love on Ozzie’s side and that’s that, no ifs or buts.

Which is not to say it CAN’T become more EVER - Cory and Robin might think this NOW, but actors rarely know details about future episodes AND since their focus is largely on acting their parts and not analysing the story as a whole, they can often be unaware of subtext and so be mistaken in their readings/understandings (ie. yes they act as the characters, but it is also possible for actors to be WRONG about their characters, that IS A THING). So it’s possible that the show is still building towards a slow-burn plan to have nygmobblepot be mutual in the future, as is commonly argued. 

Buuut, considering they have already filmed a way into the future, I personally do suspect that there’s nothing explicit about Ed returning Ozzie’s feelings on the way for at least until Cory and Robin have been given scripts for (if at all). Because if there were it could contradict these tweets and, while I know actors do sometimes lie or fudge the truth to avoid spoilers, I just don’t think either of them would be so very bold as to outright say ‘Ed is not queer’ if they KNEW that the story was going to explicitly present Ed as queer. This doesn’t strike me as the same as when Robin started being ambiguous about Ozzie’s feelings, this is a very CLEAR STATEMENT of ‘ED IS STRAIGHT.’ It’s not a teasing ‘well maybe this, or maybe that, it’s hard to say.’ 

Where does that leave me?

Well, like I said at the start, Word of God doesn’t define my interpretation of a text. As long as I continue to find subtext to support it, Ed will be queer and struggling with feelings for Oz TO ME, no matter what Cory or Robin believe :P And I will happily continue to argue that interpretation going forward for as long as I can :) 

Ships can sail passed canon and all that! Plus I’m always a sucker for angst and my characters crying AND I’ll have Eddie’s RIDDLER plot to entertain me - I’m good for still enjoying the nygmbblepot dynamic as is. And that’s not touching on the rest of the stuff in the show that still brings me pleasure :)

But, I’m hoping, though, that Cory and Robin are mistaken. 

Because a) obviously it’s always more enjoyable to ACTUALLY HAVE YOUR SHIP GET TOGETHER. But also because b) while I’m hesitant to claim queerbaiting (though I don’t think those claims should be blanket dismissed either) I do think that if nothing else having nygmobblepot be nothing but queer Ozzie hopeless in love with straight Ed will be... disappointing from a queer representation POV.

See look, I’m not saying I think Ed and Oz need to be together and happy. The common argument is that ALL romances in Gotham are messed up and tragic, so I AGREE that it’s only right that Ed and Ozzie’s be the same in order to make them EQUAL. But you know what ALL OTHER Gotham romances have gotten so far? They have been REQUITED (even if only temporarily). They have BEEN TOGETHER in ways that were recognised as explicitly romantic and/or sexual. Even romances between LITERAL CHILDREN have shared a kiss. So it seems to me that right now nygmobblepot is NOT being treated equally to other romances, and as the ONLY m/m relationship in the whole show, I DO THINK that’s maybe a problem?

But yes - there’s still the rest of the season... we’ll see.