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34saveme34 · 30 days ago

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MG AU ep 4 - Where Truth Lies

Originally meant to title it "He didn't know" but I don't like that anymore

kind of emotional episode with gay ass pay off

words: 8.4k+

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The day started… oddly. 4 took longer than usual to get ready. Not to say he was faster at getting ready than 3 was but he was never really this slow.

“Yo” he knocked on the bathroom door, considering 4 had been inside for a while “Are you good? We’re gonna be late, dumbass”

But he could hear no response. He sighed. He knew he couldn’t be too hard on 4, he didn’t seem to react best to that stuff- Not that anyone would.

“Come on…” he started again, trying to take a softer tone “I don’t wanna go against my word”

The door finally opened, 4 had a normal expression yet there were some weird vibes.

“Will… you be good to go?” 3 asked.

“In a moment, yeah” 4 forced a smile.

After grabbing what he needed, they finally got going.

“So…” 3 tried to inquire just a little more “Any reason for… why you asked to come with me?”

“No..” 4 looked away from 3 “There’s no reason”

“Huh… well…” 3 sighed “Just know I don’t believe that”

4 looked tense over that.

“Whatever…”

4 was… colder than usual. 3 was a tad bit confused. But for now all he could do is bear this while they go through the day. Maybe 4 just needed someone. Sometimes he needs reassurance too… Especially when… No, let’s… let’s not think about that. Not now.

They got to class rather quietly. Somehow 4 ended up farther from him than how he was in the beginning. 3 sat beside his friends, now his attention diverted. But he couldn’t always be kept back, sneaking glances. Seeing the gloomy frown on 4 was starting to dampen his mood too.

Regardless he tried to pay attention during class though he barely remembered anything. Luckily this was one of the professors that was giving breaks at normal intervals. And a 20 minute one was coming, usually being used for lunch and such.

3 quickly found himself walking to 4’s seat. He sat down beside him. 4 wouldn’t look at him.

“Are you just gonna pretend I’m not here?” 3 asked.

“Maybe…”

“Dumbass”

“Maybe…” 4 sighed, as he sank with his forehead lightly hitting the table in front of him.

“You’re not telling me something”

“You don’t need to know everything”

“I-... 4. I just want to know if it’s because of me. If I did something I shouldn’t have”

4 looked up, like he was about to say something. And he really almost did but he noticed something. Or someone. And quickly shut his mouth.

3 never felt so frustrated. He got up and decided to go outside for the rest of the break, needing some air.

At just the right time he came back, taking a seat with his friends. 4 once again, not even once looking his way. It was like he was trying to ignore him for some reason. What reason would he have?

Rest of the day went by with more of 4 ignoring him and his friends’ words going in one ear and out the other. He was maybe… a little obsessed with 4 not talking to him. But he didn’t know why! He was trying to figure out what he was doing wrong, what did he do to hurt him? How could he actually fix this? Would he have to get on his knees and like, beg for forgiveness? He was so receptive to his hug yesterday- was he actually pushing it? Maybe he shouldn’t have offered despite seeing how important touch seemed to be for 4. Just because he notices these kinds of things faster, maybe he shouldn’t have… Did it have to do with 4 himself feeling left out? But he would’ve mentioned that more then, no? Ugh… He just couldn’t figure it out. It felt like he was missing something. Something very close to him. Closer than he realised.

“Dude, are you even listening?” one of his friends asked.

“Yea, you’ve been staring at the air for quite a while now” another joked.

“4’s not air, okay?” 3 said a little offended.

“Dude… what did he do to you?”

3 sighed.

“We just became friends? I already told you”

“But he’s so…”

“He’s what?”

“Annoying? Weird? A freak even?”

“Like totally, he’s such a freak! He doesn’t even talk to anyone in this class! Why does a loner like him even come to college?”

3 was getting annoyed. Very annoyed at that.

“To learn? Dude, it’s that simple, now get off me about it”

After that, they were officially dismissed.

“I’m off, with my roommate, like it or not, you guys go be immature as shit without me” 3 left his friend group behind.

“We’re off, 4” he said then grabbed 4 by the arm, maybe pulling him along with a bit too much force, his friends only watched in despair. They were walking along for a bit, noises of the halls slowly drowning out their thoughts. 3 grew a bit softer, his hand travelling down to take a firm hold of 4’s hand instead. 4 didn’t know how to feel. So he just stayed quiet all the way until they got back. Not to say he didn’t feel anything, the complete opposite actually. So many things racing on his mind… His head felt like a merry-go-round malfunction.

They entered their room. 3 finally let go of 4’s hand.

“Damn, I just realised I’ve been pulling you all the way back… sorry about that”

But 4 still wouldn’t talk.

“Can you… can you at least tell me what I did wrong?” 3 asked, feeling defeated. He wanted to scream but he couldn’t make this worse. Not again.

4 looked at him then.

“You… the fact that you chose to befriend me… Like, I’m the freak of the class, right?”

“Who told you that?” 3 asked.

“... Everyone really? Why would it matter… maybe I really should just… stop…”

3 was hardly believing what he was hearing.

“This can’t be the same 4 I was talking to yesterday. The same one that accepted a hug from me despite everything” 3 was starting to get emotional.

4 didn’t answer, instead sitting down in front of his computer with a blank expression.

“4… 4 please. I can’t deal with this right now. I want to know what the FUCK happened this IS SO INFURIATING!! I JUST- I just,,,” the tears. Let’s pretend they never happened. He wiped away those not tears.

“JUST TELL ME IF YOU DON’T WANNA BE MY FRIEND” 3 was having none of this.

4 broke. Not yet with words but his neutral way of holding himself broke. He slowly turned away from his computer, his hand raised up and shaking a bit, trying to reach out yet so unsure. He looked back at 3.

“I… I’m just…” he was trying to convey what he was feeling, not too successfully though.

“Y…Yeah?”

“I’m just… scared”

“Of… is… is it me..?”

4 shook his head.

“No… it’s…”

“Just tell me! I want to help, alright?? Like, promise, I’m not playing you”

“But… if I tell you…” and so it slipped that 4 was keeping back something.

“Anything it is, please, I’m tired and I just… please”

“Your… friends… they’ve been… not the nicest to me…”

3 blinked as it settled in.

“And…” 4 said “They… told me to stay away and-… and…” but 4 couldn’t finish, the words left unspoken.

3 was mad to say the least.

“Really now? What the fuck… What the fuck?? How can adults be so fucking immature!” 3 paced in the room while the anger settled in “Like genuinely, how can thry be such a pieces of shits… thinking they can fucking control who I’m talking to, not even my parents could stop me from talking to people they didn’t want me to, what makes them think THEY can??” 3 rambled on then stopped by 4 in his anger induced state. Looking at 4, all he could see was worry. Did 4 ever even not worry? He sighed, hugging 4, telling himself that it was only 4 that needed it and not him.

“You don’t need to stay away. Don’t let them tell you shit”

“...Alright..” 4 took a bit to hug back “I’m… I’m sorry I’m causing so much trouble”

3 only hugged him tighter in response. It… did feel nice. It felt like an eternity until 3 let go. 4 was starting to think he wasn’t the clingy one in this room.

“All that for calling me the clingy one…” he joked, trying to ease some tension.

And it did fluster 3.

“Look, man, I’m just trying not to isolate you! Or is that not allowed anymore?”

“You fought for your right to do so”

“I sure damn fucking did. I think I deserve to listen to some Peach now”

“... Is her music comforting to you?”

“In a way, yeah”

“Huh… I mean I guess it’s an idyllic image of a world… kind of the definition of escapism”

“It’s also about her performance to me. There’s something about it… Like she reaches beyond that, she’ll always have something we don’t, it’s like-”

“A lot of money”

3 stared for a second then laughed.

“Yeah alright I walked right into that alright, you got me there”

4 laughed.

“But I get it. I’m not as fixated on it but I see what you mean. I do really like her outfits though”

3 thought for a bit if he should ask what he was about to.

“Well… would you wear her outfits?” 3 asked, he really had no ulterior motives despite 4 getting quickly flustered.

“What makes you think thaat?”

3 looked at him like he was stupid.

“Am I- Am I missing something?” 4 asked again.

“Your guardian outfit?”

“That’s- that’s a…totally special case”

“But you like it?”

4 was slowly starting to sink in his seat.

“I mean” 3 was trying to think of the right way to say it “Not that it’s a bad thing this- isn’t some stupid ass interrogation, I just wanted to say you do look nice in it, it suits you”

“Are you lying?”

“Nah, I told you before, I still think you look cute in it”

“Oh- Oh huh” 4 was gonna think about that longer than he was probably ever meant to. Not that stopped a smile from creeping on his face. It did make him happy.

And the conversation was left there. Despite some feelings lingering like a strong perfume that could chase the writer (me) out of the world.

4 turned to turn on his computer. He was still feeling flustered. For some reason when it was someone who was a friend to him and not just some guy it just hit more? He didn’t quite understand what this feeling was really. But he was kind of happy. Maybe he could look into… dressing like it too… maybe one day. Not that he would know where to start… or how to actually be confident enough for that. And the prices, and if he gets into it he would have to buy more stuff to actually be able to put together outfits- And he would have to be so selective too- AND oh OH the nightmare of sizes, especially with his physique, if it wasn’t for the guardian outfit, he wouldn’t have any of the sort. He’d be…. so miserable. But oh if none of these were a factor. He could still dream despite being 999% sure that the only way anyone will ever see him in a dress will be only through his guardian form. At least he had that if nothing else. Like a beacon of a rainbow among a sky of gray so blurry and weird.

While he was deep in thoughts he barely even noticed Puzzles popping up who looked a little concerned.

“SMG4! SMG4! Can you hear me?” they sobbed.

“Oh! Oh, yeah uhm, sorry. Hey, can you fetch me what I worked on last? It’s been a bit”

“Of course!” and they went to fetch the file “Here it is, this script was the last thing you worked on, where Bowser was planning to steal the Moon to impress the Princess. And yes, the snapcube reference is in it already!”

“Mhmm…” 4 thought for a bit then started writing.

He knew he wanted the ending for Bowser to be pathetic, he thought it was really fun to see brutes like him fail. Not that the actual games were much kinder, his episodes were just more direct about it. He was debating on whether or not to make Mario piss on the Moon. Sure it would be great if he took the reference that seriously… Maybe have Eggman appear for comedic effect? Maybe thanking Bowser so he can piss on the Moon easier? And that leaving the Princess disappointed and disgusted and leaving? This is a possibility… But he gotta think about it harder, if there could be anything else he could come up with. He can only deliver the best comedy he could think of or else.

“Are you stumped?” Puzzles asked, noticing that 4 stopped.

“Oh, I’m just considering the possibilities, lot of ways this can go”

“Well, isn’t that always the case?”

“Most of the time… sometimes endings will be incredibly obvious, sometimes not”

“Huh…” Puzzles pretended to understand 4’s wisdom.

“Hey, 4?” 3 piped up suddenly after looking at his phone for a bit, disturbing the brainstorming.

“Yeah?”

“Y’know, I actually added Meg and she’s asking if we’d like to come down to the beach, considering the weather’s not that bad yet”

“That does sound nice…but my script…” 4 lamented.

“Honestly… maybe I could help- but don’t rely on me too hard. But I could maybe help with some stuff”

“Oh? Oh like- audio, right?”

“Yeah! But honestly I did dabble a- teeny tiny bit in video editing but it really wasn’t much. Aaand I’m also not proud of it-”

4 was looking at him like he REALLY wanted to know what those videos could be.

“You’re not gonna see them, 4, they’re EMBARRASSING” 3 looked a little flustered.

“Aw man… My first works are embarrassing too though!”

“Look, us being friends won’t give you the right to see the worst things I’ve ever done”

“So I just need to get closer to him to see it…” 4 thought out loud then realised what he did as 3 was looking at him a little flustered but more annoyed.

“Awful reason to get closer to me”

“But it is one…” 4 said, trying to make it sound like a joke. 4, you really suck at this.

“So! Anyways! Beach?”

“Y-. Yeah right! Yea! Maybe I’ll get an idea there too…”

“...Should I do anything until then, SMG4?” Puzzles asked, rather timid. 4 then just realised that he was silent all throughout their conversation.

“Uhhh… well actually… how about you look for some marble models for me? It’s for… a future idea I have but…. anything marble related is good to go”

“Oh? Uhm… Like the material?”

“Like the little glass balls, while you’re at it, maybe some marble raceway models too if you can find any, if not I’m sure we can work something out”

“Uhuuuuh. What do you plan to do with them?”

“No spoilers” 4 asserted dominance, as if he actually had an exact idea for the plot.

3 chuckled.

“Then I can write back to her about it?”

“Yeah”

The 2 got ready to go out, dressing somewhat warmer. 4 put on a hoodie, while 3 put on a thin coat which kind of looked like a dress when zipped up. And 4 sure thought it fit him.

They got going, this time 3 leading there because 4 had never been to the beach.

They got on the bus that would take them there, once again ending up sitting next to each other.

“Good you at least know where it is so well” 4 said.

“Of course I do, the city is like my second home. I didn’t spend- too much time at my actual home”

“Oh, that explains that part of your rant…”

“Huh?”

“You don’t like your home”

“...I…” 3 thought for a moment “Damn it, I didn’t even realise I said that”

“It… happens… I don’t like home too much either. I was left alone a lot, especially after my sister left home”

“You.. have a sister?”

“Yeah. Half sister at that… We were still talking for a bit but she got too busy… I wonder what she’s up to now”

“What’s she like?” 3 asked.

“Oh? Well, if you want to know… She was so- so different from me. So chaotic and fun but still caring, always so full of energy, knowing how to make me feel better… The best sister someone could ask for” 4 rambled a little, a sort of bitter sweet look on his face.

“Hope you get to see her soon again” 3 pat him on the shoulder.

“Yeah… anyways how long until we get there?”

“Oh this is… longer than how far you usually go I think. About a hour despite the bus going directly there”

“Wow…”

“Do you regret coming now?”

“I mean, I would’ve wanted to know but- I uh… I guess it’s not the end of the world”

“I’ll tell you next time”

3 looked out the window now, relaxing a little. Just as he would’ve fully immersed himself in the little sounds and feels of the bus he felt 4 lean on him. He was kind of glad 4 was there. He leaned on 4 a little bit too. He looked at 4, expecting him to not show much but instead he saw such a peaceful smile on his face… Yeah, let’s not dwell on that.

They spent the rest of it peacefully like that and almost forgot to get off but thank god it was the last stop.

As they got off, the beach was visible from the stop. 4 found the view pretty. He then regretted coming just a little bit less. Though he’d be lying if he said 3’s simple presence wasn’t also at least a little bit nice.

“Don’t just stand here, we can’t have Meg wait for us forever”

“Oh- OH! Right! Sorry, it’s just really pretty, with the sky too…”

“Yeah yeah” 3 said then pulled 4 along. He found the view pretty too but they couldn’t leave Meggy hanging on just like that.

It didn’t take them much walking to spot Meggy with someone else with her, being Tari who seemed to be deep in making an absurdly large, detailed sand castle. Nobody else was there, probably because not everyone likes to visit beaches when it’s cold.

“Hey, you two!!” Meggy walked up to them, greeting them, Tari didn’t notice the 2 as she was rather fixated on her diabolically large fortress, it was taller than her!

“Heya” 3 said, with a relaxed smile. He did feel pretty comfortable, with that good old beach breeze and all that. Very good fresh air after today.

“Oh yeah, hi! Sorry just… wow” 4 was belated as he was absolutely enamoured with Tari’s work.

“It sure is something” 3 and Meggy somehow managed to say in sync which made 3 chuckle.

“Copying me now, are you?” he teased her.

“Not my fault you decided to express yourself the same way as I did” she teased back.

“I’ll make you somehow believe that it is” 3 said, clearly knowing he could never do that but it made Meggy chuckle nonetheless.

“I’ll listen to your argument alright, lay it out for me, I did some debate stuff before”

They proceeded to argue for fun, as it turns out after talking about it, they both really like to do that so it was way less tense compared to what happened at that freshman event.

Meanwhile 4 watched what Tari was making. She was carefully carving out her castle of excellence with how precise she was. Crazy precise actually, 4 thought she could maybe even…. do surgery…. on a grape even.

4 laughed at that thought which alerted Tari all of a sudden, as she almost fell into her castle but 4 grabbed her by her arms before she could, although he had to put his weight into it a little bit considering that her arms weren’t exactly the lightest. And she’s walking around them so casually…

“Sorry, Tari! I should’ve said something but you were so focused on your castle”

“Wuh- Uh yeah! It’s fine, 4, really! I only smudged a little part” she pointed to a place where she accidentally smeared away a part of an intricate pattern that was running along the walls.

“So, sand castles, huh?”

“Yeah! Actually the idea came from Meggy, we were like- looking at the best ways to make a sand castle and I-” she chuckled “I really optimised it. It’s cool, right?”

“More than cool” 4 smiled, sincerely.

Tari was flustered over the compliment but she looked so giddy.

“Yeah!!! It’s so nice to hear that you know! Getting praise for something you have fun with? So cool”

“I get how you feel. That’s how I am with my videos too”

“Videos?”

“Yeah like… they’re basically animations that have some story but some memes too- sometimes more story, sometimes more memes, depending on how I feel and what the plot demands.”

“Wow” Tari said, genuinely invested “And how do you decide what the plot demands?”

“It depends how I can implement memes! I can’t just put in random ones, they have to do with the plot! Like I can’t put uhm…. I can’t put cat videos as a meme in a villain’s monologue- unless if it fits… if it’s more serious I wouldn’t do it but if it’s to maybe give the viewers some space to breathe with maybe there being previously a lot of action…. heck, cat videos could even be an important plot point!”

Tari looked on him like a little baby, so interested in what he’s saying, so inquisitive but barely understanding what he’s saying as well.

“Wow- This whole video making stuff sounds so complicated!! You’re so talented”

“We’ve all got our strengths, Tari”

“Yeah!” she said, punching forward and her fortress suffered the blow. She looked ahead of herself a little shocked. She forgot how close she was to it.

“Aww, sorry” 4 said almost instinctively.

“It’s not your fault!! At least it wasn’t something actually important” she said while looking away.

“Tari?” 4 noticed something off.

“Tari, are you okay?” Meggy noticed the feeling of something off too. 3 looked on too.

“If I… ever made a… no” she muttered under her breath “No! No, I gotta work on my attention span! This- This can’t happen again” she spoke rather loudly then got up and tried to fix her castle as fast as possible. She looked scared. This wasn’t something entirely unfamiliar to Meggy.

“Tari…” Meggy spoke softly “Just- Just make sure not to burn out your arms, last time it took a bit to get them back to their usual state”

But Tari didn’t seem to hear her.

4 froze up while 3 tried to talk to Tari.

“Yo, Tari, it’s okay, even with mistakes your build looks great! It’s natural to mess up sometimes, sometimes worse than usual… it sadly happens”

Tari stopped.

“Life ruining mistakes too? Are they natural?”

“Sure are”

“...I wish I had nothing natural about me…”

But at least she stopped before she could fry any circuits. Meggy sighed in relief.

“Wow, I didn’t know you could give pep talks” Meggy teased 3.

“I just acted cuz no one else would- don’t feel miserable about that” 3 said while pointing and looking at 4.

“Geez- um, alright” 4 was taken aback. Was he… that obvious?

Suddenly, Tari started crying, which alerted all three of them.

“Oh, dear! Tari” Meggy got the closest to her, wrapping an arm around her back in an attempt to comfort her. 4 froze for a bit. What could he even say? He had nothing. But that was when it hit him.

“Wait, Tari, are you… are you sad because it’s not perfect? You know I… tend to be a perfectionist too” she looked up at him, as she had been kneeling beside her ruins.

“And like, of course it’s not comparable to the amazing things you can do but… I know when I get lost in the idea that I might mess up well… I mess up more, inevitably. There’s- so much out there and uh… focusing on your worst moments can really ruin what good you have”

Tari thought for a bit. She wiped her tears away, now looking more sorrowful.

“I… hadn’t been too truthful. I- broke down this bad because… I remembered what happened last time I messed up like this… it wasn’t a great time to say the least… but, thank you, 4 I… do think you have a point… if maybe one day I won’t be able to come out from Tascorp again, I’ll remember what you said” she smiled by the end, although a bittersweet smile.

“And I assure you, you’d be missed the same way, I won’t ever forget you, Tari” Meggy added.

Tari felt emotional again, almost throwing herself on Meggy, hugging her tightly.

“Woah, careful!” Meggy giggled.

“So…” 3 attempted to change the topic “What made you 2 come down here, anything specific?”

“Last week there was a huge storm that brought some stuff up and I wanted to look around!” Meggy said, although still stuck in Tari’s grip.

“Some stuff?” 4 asked.

“It’s the BEST time to collect pretty rocks, especially with the fact that it’s too cold to go in the water at this point… aaaand other things of course…..”

She had a devious grin which had both 3 and 4 share a look, unsure of what they got themselves into.

Meggy was finally let go from hug prison and they went on a search. Turned out she had a metal detector so they could use that as well. 4 decided to show Tari more memes to which 3 kind of joined in after a while. It was… a little bit funny. Especially when they watched a meme that actually made 3 chuckle which of course got those 2’s attention.

“Oh, quit looking at me like that!” he stood for himself, though flustered “It’s not like I have seen anything else you guys watched!”

4 looked at him like he was stupid.

“C’mon, 3, watch memes with us, it’s fun!” Tari was trying to convince 3.

“With this guy I’m seeing memes all fucking day”

“I’m just ‘this guy’ now?” 4 pouted, clearly trying to get a reaction out of 3.

“Would you rather be ‘that guy’ instead?”

“Oh, are you implying with words that you’re distancing yourself from me?”

“Or, I could go with my guy”

“Now I’m owned”

“Nothing’s good for the guy”

“You guys…” Meggy looked back at the 2. She was entertained although their stupidity might’ve caused her some psychic damage.

“I don’t know, Meggy, I think they’re rather entertaining”

“I’m trying to concentrate though”

“Damn” 4 said.

“I guess you can’t be guy no more…” 3 pat him on the back.

“You can be guy despite whatever Meggy’s saying” Tari whispered to him, making him chuckle.

Then Meggy suddenly fell over on something.

“WHOAH!” she exclaimed only after she already fell. Talk about delayed reaction.

“Meggy!!! Are you okay!!?” Tari immediately got beside her, helping her up by her waist. Rather fast at that. Meggy didn’t look fazed at all. Does this happen often?

“All good just… lemme see…” She reached down and grabbed what looked to be a choker with a pendant embedded. It looked to be a circle but cut into even, but sort of curved slices, and everything else but one slice being gray while the odd one out was light blue. It was also colder than the other parts of it. And had a strange aura. Weird.

“Woah” she looked at it, a little mesmerised “You guys think this was fate?”

“It’s a necklace?” 3 said.

“It’s a pretty one though! I bet it’d look good on you, Meggy” Tari said.

Meggy put it on. It really did feel like fate. It fit her perfectly. Maybe too perfectly.

“This alone makes today ultra successful” she exclaimed with a big smile as they then continued going around.

3 got to the tail of the group now, being the straggler while 4 and Tari went right back to memes. He was just thinking about stuff… Time heals they say, yet he felt the same grief he did last year and before that when coming closer and closer to a certain date ingrained in his mind. He shook his head, he couldn’t think about that right now.

Then he heard barking. He looked around to see what looked like an eggshaped dog. No one else seemed to notice the lil guy yet, who, after being noticed, decided to run up to him.

“Woah! Little guy!” he exclaimed.

4 and Tari looked back to see him talk with the eggdog.

“Woah, really? I wouldn’t have guessed but that sounds awful!”

“3?” 4 asked which got his attention.

“Wow, I didn’t know 3 liked dogs so much!” Tari said, finding the display cute. Meggy noticed all the other 3 stopped.

“What kinda animal is that?” she asked, although it would’ve been more of an inside thought she said that outloud anyways.

“Well… appears to be a meme actually!” 4 said, as he pulled up his organised meme folder on his phone. He showed Tari and Meggy, indeed confirming the lil guy as such.

“4…” 3 started, whining “Can we keep him? Please? He promises to be a good boy”

“H– Huh? 3- it’s a dorm-”

Both 3 and the eggdog were giving him the best puppy eyes they could muster. It flustered and made 4 laugh at the same time.

“Geez, you…”

“Look, he can turn into an egg!” 3 said very excited and then the eggdog turned into an egg “It’s the perfect disguise!!”

Meggy looked on baffled.

“What kinda sorcery is this???”

Tari was more excited in awe.

“Memes? I already said so?” 4 said.

“Why are you 2 so casual about this? This- This thing isn’t a normal animal!”

4 froze up while 3 got rather offended.

“Hey, don’t you say that about Eggy, he lives and breathes just as much as any other animal!”

“And why are you so casual? Do YOU just see living, breathing memes everyday?”

3 was taken aback now too, while 4 settled even more in his panic.

“Well- guess so. You don’t?”

“No??”

“They like, attack cities every once in a while, though more times lately than usual.”

“HOW can memes ATTACK??”

“Like- the monsters you see around are like, irritated memes or something like that! After being defeated they turn pretty docile, like Eggy here!”

“Why do you know so much?” Meggy was clearly suspicious.

“I just live and go out enough to see them”

“I’ve never seen a picture of a harmless one of those creatures”

“I saw them with my own eyes”

“How are they even real?”

“I don’t know but I’m glad they are” he hugged Eggy. 4 took a second still, as he froze up but the sight of 3 looking happy like that was sort of reassuring. Maybe they could go through this without-

“4, what is your opinion on all this?” Meggy asked him with quite the accusatory tone.

He looked at her like she was eldritch horror with how pale he looked.

“U-Uhhh…Uhm…uh…” he couldn’t find the words.

“Meggy.” Tari put a hand on Meggy’s shoulder pretty firmly “Let them be, I… really don’t think this is necessary”

“I’m just- I’m bothered by this. I don’t like secrets, I hate when- I hate when…” she went quiet.

“It’s… not anything like that…” 4 broke a bit, showing there was indeed something “There’s just… some things you might not be safe knowing for all I know ahah,,” he laughed awkwardly by the end.

“Besides if we told you, you wouldn’t believe it” 3 said pretty nonchalantly.

“I would!” Tari cheered for them.

“I don’t know what to believe. The world is strange…” she looked like she lost hope then sighed “But I can try at least. I… hope you guys can trust me…. trust us. And maybe we could- even help, I don’t know- I don’t know what I’m saying anymore” she felt lost in some way. And slowly, not just mentally.

“Meggy…? Are you alright?” Tari looked at her concerned.

“Uhmm.. probably… nooooot no uh… maybe? I don’t know…” she felt the world spin a little.

“I- I think I’ll take her home! You guys take care and… don’t get in too much trouble alright, I hope to hang out again!” Tari waved them goodbye and then helped Meggy get going too.

3 and 4 started to walk back too, with Eggy following behind them calmly, looked like he was a little sleepy. Poor little guy had probably travelled a lot.

“Did… Did we really almost tell them?” 4 asked 3.

“Eh… I don’t know what it is but… wait…” he got his phone out “That necklace…”

“What about it?”

“I don’t know, it had a weird aura? I don’t know if you could see it too”

“Like…? I… might’ve”

“In a way it felt like the… stone thing in it had a weird weight to it? I hope it’s not like… deathly. Which is why I want to warn Tari and Meg about it”

“Ah! Yeah, I get what you mean but… besides the weight…it was… really strong?”

“Something to tell about to 1 and 2 I guess, huh?”

“You think they might know something about it?”

“Definitely more than us”

4 stayed silent after this while 3 wrote the message to Tari about warning her.

By the time they got to the bus stop, the sky started to get darker and darker. And it showed because Eggy was now eggified and 3 was holding onto him in the space between his overalls and top, considering his lack of front pockets. Maybe he would invest in more clothes like that just for his little guy…

4 didn’t really like being out in the city when it was past such an hour. He seemed to be visibly scared as he noticed 3 looking at him rather concerned.

“Dude… are you scared or something?” he asked 4 quietly, trying not to disturb him further.

“Juuuust uneasy” 4 lied “I totally don’t have a reason to be scared haha”

“I’ll just say” 3 leaned closer to talk even more quietly to 4 “I’ll beat up anyone who tries to mug you or some shit, if I get a felony I get a felony, who cares”

4 wasn’t sure if to get baffled by or to laugh at 3’s nonchalant behaviour. So he did neither, just looking at 3 with a weird grin with how he was stuck not knowing how to respond.

“You look like a dumbass right now, 4” 3 teased him but it came off more lovingly if anything.

“I’m not the one who wants to get arrested for his friend”

“I didn’t say I wanted to! I said if I have to then that’s not a problem. Besides I’ve been before and it’s… eh”

4 had to do a double take.

“Huh I? You know, I don’t know why I’m surprised”

“Maybe you need to spend more time with me to never be surprised by such facts about me”

“I already spend enough time by you I think”

“Maybe it’s YOU who wants me in jail….. then you can have the whole room to yourself!! How clever”

4 looked at 3 as if he was stupid.

“That was awful”

“Aw, not liking the bit anymore?”

4 thought for a second.

“Oh, it was just a bit?”

“Damn considering throwing me out, just like that?”

“You’d come back anyways”

“If you push me away enough I might not” there was genuinity “Just kidding, I’m a cockroach of a man” and there wasn’t.

“Didn’t know I was such a desirable roommate”

“I didn’t know either”

4 laughed at the comment.

3 could maybe listen to it forever. But whatever, no he wouldn’t. He heard it enough anyways. But he smiled either way, seeing that sticking to the bit helped 4 feel better. At least for him to feel better while he-

But then he noticed 4 didn’t seem fine, as if something struck him and was on his mind.

“Are… you good?”

“I just… felt like someone was staring at us”

“Huh… Hopefully it was nothing?”

“Yeah…”

Just as they’d get comfortable, someone approached them from the back, coming beside them.

It was… a girl from their class, someone who was fond of 3.

“Yo, dude!” she said, fully ignoring 4 “Didn’t think I’d see you on this bus! Where to?”

“Back to dorms. Today’s been a bit long”

“Honestly, I was kinda hoping you would come with us to hang out. I recently found a pretty cool place”

“Maybe next time? Today was exhausting, really, sorry”

“Is it because you hung out with this guy?”

Oh, was she really about to…

4 sunk in his seat.

“Hey now, he’s alright. I really…. I really don’t feel like this right now. I’m tired”

“You’re not fun anymore…. like, you used to be cool”

3 was really not having this.

“I said I’m tired. I promise you I’m not fun to have around when tired”

She took a bit but then went back to where she was originally, though not looking pleased or satisfied with the answer she got.

“...Will…. Will this be… ok?” 4 asked, quietly, as if someone could hear him who wasn’t supposed to.

“I’m not going out this tired no way”

“Yeah…”

“Besides, she was being rude to you”

“...Riiight”

“Our stop seems to come soon so at least there’s that, bet you need a bit of rest too”

“Well… Yeah, I do”

They got off the bus, walking back to their dormitory. It was rather quiet, maybe both were too tired to speak much by this point. 4 wasn’t realising it as he was thinking about other stuff but he was leaning towards 3. He only realised that when they actually made contact, with his head on 3’s shoulder. 3 didn’t react much, just looking at him. 4 realised his error and straightened up, not saying a word about it. 3 tilted his head, maybe looking a little concerned.

“Are you good?”

“Yeah! Yeah… ah..”

“You don’t have to jump around over the smallest things. I don’t mind you being close, really”

“I didn’t uhm… I didn’t mean to either way”

“I see” why did that hurt a little?

They finally arrived inside, 3 wordlessly sat down on his bed, getting his phone out to see if Tari wrote anything back. Nothing much could he see at that moment so he moved onto other things. Eggy rolled out from 3’s overalls and landed on his bed, quickly finding comfortable space on it. Such a good boy.

4 was standing there for a bit before going for his pc, finally booting it up. And so the night would pass. And both went to sleep, not exchanging too many more words. It felt weird. Like they were supposed to say more but it would all just stay in the back of their minds. Feeling tense in a way that didn’t feel right at all while feeling like addressing it would just make it worse. Especially if they were to address it and maybe it would just turn out to be nothing. There was a chance for that right? 4 had a hard time falling asleep but he did regardless, trying hard not to think about the awful things such wretched things as tomorrow could bring.

It was foggy and the air felt like it could eat a hole through you. And people that would look on with delight, not seeing the way you suffer. Or maybe they were enjoying seeing you like this. You would never know why it even began like this. They would just like for specifically you, YOU to not achieve anything. They just wouldn’t want you to have what you might think you deserve. You’re not even sure if you deserve anything at all anymore. Do you even deserve the air you breathe, even if it’s made of everything that should’ve killed you long ago? Or maybe it’s just waiting for you to do it. Especially because they laugh, unafraid of how you might take it, maybe even relishing in the idea that you could hate this. They’re entertained because of you! Isn’t that wonderful? You, on the top of this stage, and the air is still weird. And they gasp for air from laughing so much because you make a fool of yourself even just standing there. And when you would fall.

Was when 4 woke up, gasping for air, wide eyed, scared. Then nothing much. Looking in front of himself he felt miserable and miserably stupid. He got up to go out and wash his face. He glanced towards 3 while going, seeing he was still sleeping made him feel less tense. He didn’t want to bother 3 about… whatever all that nightmare was.

He washed his face, finally feeling some relief on his skin. He looked at himself in the mirror, the misery couldn’t hide behind his eyes at all. It was written all over his face with obvious signs. His face truly screamed that he hated living. He sighed, once again feeling hopeless about himself. He felt like the next day was gonna be real long.

He left the bathroom, not really masking away his feelings. That was a mistake.

“...4?” he heard one single word, his name, coming right from 3 and all that fear he thought he lost, all that anxiety came back tenfold.

“I’m good!” he immediately protested, trying to push all that dread to the back.

“Dude” 3 said as if he thought 4 was stupid.

“You don’t need to worry”

“I woke up because of you”

“Huh?”

“I mean uhm… you know how like this…” he yawned “this guardian thing… I woke up because I had this like, dreadful feeling that you feel like shit”

4 blinked, oh my god, of course this thing would work like the most evil telepathy. Can he hide ANYTHING in this room, anything at all??

“Well… what else can I say that I didn’t say before?” 4 said, halfly telling the truth.

“Are you gonna be… fine?”

“Probably…”

“Do you need anything?”

“Uhm..” 4 stood there, almost motionless. A question that caught him in stasis. He wanted something but even he wasn’t sure what. Or maybe he did he just wasn’t sure. Did he even deserve comfort?

“Are you just gonna stand there?”

“Uhmmm! Uh,,” 4 kept standing though more urgently now. Really trying to speed up hesitation. As if that could ever work. The words burned in his mind and maybe they got further with how his face felt. His breathing became a bit louder because of it.

“You can just say if you don’t want anything you know” a slip of honesty with a hint of sorrow. Weird.

4 felt something then. His feet gained feeling. And so he moved, each step towards 3. 3 looked at him confused. But then 4 reached out, hugging 3 close without another word. 3 only took half a moment to hug back. Almost felt like he was expecting this. Or he just wanted it so much he willed it into existence. And he hugged him tighter, whatever it was it couldn’t stand between them. 3 never felt so… hellbent on helping someone. He pulled him in and down a bit, 4 ended up half laying on 3’s bed, not that he realised that. He was busy slowly starting to cry. As soon as 3 heard the first sob, he held on tight. He didn’t think he’d be comforting 4 so late at night but here he was. And it felt kind of cathartic. He was just a little confused with 4’s behaviour. Once so intimately close then suddenly acting so cold and then running right back to him. It was frustrating. And he thought sleeping would make him forget but it didn’t.

“There’s a reason you were off when coming back” 3 said matter of factly.

“It was her”

“...Eh? Wait my… Did she do something I didn’t see?”

“Not… this time…”

“4…”

3 pulled out of the hug enough to make 4 face him.

“4, what do you mean this time”

4 looked scared.

“What did they… do to you?”

“Where do I… start… I- hm… do you uh… promise not to freak out?”

“I can try”

“Well uh… their first movement was to… push me off the stairs once. And we…weren’t even talking then. I was just your roommate…And other than that whenever they could get away with… actually just… hitting me…telling me to hide anything unless I want more… like I should hide myself” he cried by the end.

3 wasn’t even sure what to say. He was really mad by all this, for more than one reason.

“You’re staying here”

“...H…Here as in?” 4 was confused, seeing how his words were received.

“Here” 3 said sternly, fully pulling 4 into his bed. That was when 4 fully realised his situation. He felt hot, like this was…Wrong?

“What… uhm what… do you mean?” 4 was trying to keep his calm.

“I just… feel guilty even letting you out of my sight. It feels like if I do even for a second… something could happen and then you seemingly want me gone all over again”

“I didn’t want you gone at all, 3… Just…felt scared to… talk with them around and… felt like I don’t… deserve it at all”

“Nonsense… look, I… I may be tired but I know that’s stupid”

“But I…” 4 was flustered. Very. He was full of so many conflicting feelings, it was driving him mad.

“I mean I… guess you can just go back but… yeah you can just go if you… want to, yeah” 3 was now the one being stupid about his words.

4 thought for a moment. He closed his eyes to think, to feel. Maybe it was weird but the idea of indulging felt so enticing. But it felt wrong too! For some… reason…

“Is it… Is it weird to feel guilty about it?”

“You’re allowed to indulge” 3 said the right words. Never did he say words that had 4 so convinced. It was like the stars aligned just for 4 to stop thinking so damn hard. He could indulge, he really could, this was okay. At least 3 found it okay and… 4 loved the idea so… Who could ever… Who could ever tell them this isn’t fine? Besides, he hadn’t had comfort like this since his sister moved out, the only other person who was as clingy as him. He could really let himself have this, at least this once. Just… this single time.

4 basically lept further into 3’s arms, who took him in. Never did the urge to protect make him feel so stupid, like a guard dog. Did 3 ever change?

But maybe he could indulge too, just for a little bit at least. He deserved it after such a long day. He held 4, with everything in him, nothing to hide. 4 finally felt real peace even if it came in such a weird form. But he was allowed to indulge, he really was. They fell asleep like that, though couldn’t fully take the bed with Eggy around, he took up a bit of space around them. But damn, was it so comfortable and didn’t it feel so right when they didn’t think about anything else.

The next day, 4 was the first one to wake up, feeling a little confused at first but then the situation really settled in his brain. His tired, sad brain really thought it would be cool to just- sleep beside 3, of course, a marvelous idea! Though when he’d look at 3’s face, it felt like worries could melt away and leave as fast as they came. Was it weird to think that 3 made him happy? Well… friends are meant to make you feel happy so maybe not that weird. Besides, the way he could listen to him made him feel nice. He wished he could repay him somehow so he wouldn’t feel so indebted to him.

Though he couldn’t be lost in 3 for too long as he did stir awake. Now he was stuck in a bit of a staring contest, neither saying much.

“...Morning?” 3 finally pulled through his morning confusion to be confused about the situation instead.

“I.. yea uhhmm, morninng hahhhaa”

“You’re so awkward” 3 chuckled.

“I-.. I guess”

“Don’t like… overthink it… that’s gonna ruin it”

“Uh… huh”

“I mean, you can also always just get up”

“Right”

But he didn’t. Damn, getting up sounded even worse!

“So?”

“Soo…”

“What are you gonna do?”

“You’re really putting me on the spot”

“Oh well”

4 rolled his eyes.

“I thought you cared” he said dramatically.

“Yeah, like I totaaaally invited you to sleep in my bed with me fooorrr fuuuuun”

“Why did you anyways? I mean… we’re adults and it was just a silly nightmare…”

“Uh- heat of the moment” 3 got up, a bit flustered, looking away from 4 “Don’t think too hard about it”

“So it wasn’t out of you caring?”

“4… 4….” 3 sighed “Of course it was because of that, maybe the guardian link too I don’t know… I guess I just wanted you to feel safe”

4 smiled, that felt nice to know.

“Yeah… you did succeed”

Brief moment of happiness. Guards down.

“Wait, shit, what time is it?” 3 reached for his phone to check “5… That’s crazy early actually”

“Huh…It felt later to me but sure”

“Yep” he laid back “That’s nice”

4 thought for a bit, for some long, painful moments, before pulling himself close to 3, resting his head on 3’s chest, which did leave 3 a little surprised, not that he minded all to much.

“Hope it’s cool of me to take advantage of it” 4 said. Indulging was fun.

“Sure alright” 3 chuckled, wrapping his arm around 4 in a way so he can’t squeeze the feel out of it. That stuff is uncomfortable!

Finally, despite everything, things started to look up. Hopefully that would keep up.

#smg4 #smg34 #smg4 au #nicc's-magical-au #nicc's-fics

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divinedelusional · 24 days ago

Text

without my baby

nate archibald x fem reader

word count: 1513

warnings: angst at the end

a/n: hi babes, this is second part to his darkest hour, there will be part three and it's gonna be a happy one, so don't worry. this fic contains a little bit of blair x nate but only a past relationship! also in this au nate didn't kiss serena at a masked ball. fic takes place in season 1 after ep 6 & 7, loosely inspired by it. changed reader to female bc it was easier for me to write it, but there's no description of reader's appearance

Nate was doing everything he thought he could, to get you to talk to him. After the unfortunate evening, he only saw you for a minute, when you were leaving school after the test you studied for last night. It was weird for him since he knew you had at least two more classes to attend. He tried calling you later that day and was texting you constantly during classes. Next day he even called your house when you were absent at school once again. Your mum picked up the phone and informed him that you weren't feeling well. Then she chit chatted with him a bit about the test and school stuff and Nate sighed with relief. He always got along with your parents and wouldn't want to upset them, so by the tone of your mum's voice he figured out that you didn't tell her what he did. But that didin't change the fact that you didn't want to talk to him and haven't answered his texts. He sat outside, where you usually eat your lunches together. It was after his last class and he was to deep in his thoughts to notice that almost everyone went home.

"Archibald, what are you still doing here?" he heard familiar voice and noticed Blair coming up to him. He looked at her while she walked to sit beside him and didn't say anything.

"Hate to say it, but you look like hell" Blair said and Nate chuckled.

"Nice to see you too, Blair."

"Where's y/n? I haven't seen her since the test yesterday".

"If only I knew... I said something to her that I didn't mean to and she's not talking to me since then"

Blair stared at him in shock.

"I'm not good at talking things out lately you know"

"But what happened that you said that to her?" Blair asked geniunely concerned.

"I had a lot going on, first this thing with my dad, then with us... Blair I'm sorry, we hadn't even talked about what happened with us and I'm already..."

"Nate, stop. It's okay. Guess time will show, but I had a feeling that something is off even before that thing with your dad".

"You did?"

"Yeah, but I was too focused on trying to save it, to make our relationship still be seen as perfect even if I could come to you and talk how you feel with it how we feel with it. To be honest that stunt your parents pulled with a ring...that kinda can mess with your head right?" she smiled.

"Right" Nate chuckled "I'm sorry Blair but this, us it started to feel more like something everyone wants us to be not what we really are"

"Yeah, we dated for so long that everyone just assumed it's gonna be forever, huh?" Blair said. "But Nate, I can't imagine us not being friends, so while we still have things to figure out, you can always count on me."

"Thank you Blair" Nate replied by hugging her.

"But you should definitely talk to y/n, tell her everything you told me, she deserves to know. I'll stop by her house today, so maybe I can get her to talk to you, okay?"

"I hope she'll say yes."

"Why didn't you tell her right away? You know, when I was busy with masked ball and Chuck didn't listen. Y/n's always there for us, so what made you not tell her?"

"If only I knew Blair, if only I knew..." Nate answered and looked down.

Blair didn't answer and looked at her friend like she knew something he had yet to figure out.

Nate stood before your bedroom door two days after he had talked to Blair. It turned out that you really catched a cold that's why you weren't at school. Blair told Nate she didn't need to convince you much and the same day you replied to his texts. Nate was sure that you will forgive him but still was very nervous when he knocked on your door.

"Come in!" you called. Nate entered your bedroom where you stood by your desk.

"Hi" Nate said quietly.

"Hi" you answered. "Please Nate, sit. Want some green tea?"

You were acting so normal like nothing had happened, but Nate knew better and that made him feel even more guilty. He yelled at you the other day, yet here you were, doing everything to make him feel comfortable, becasue you were his friend, and you knew that he would never act like this if something major hadn't happened.

Nate sat on your bed while you sat on an armchair next to your vanity so you could look at him while remaining space.

"Y/n I'm sorry, I should've come to you sooner..."

"Nate, please" you leaned towards him and put your hand over his. "I already forgave you, you know that. I just want you to know what happened."

So Nate told her everything. How he found out his dad's bag of coke, how he lied to Nate's mother that Nate was the one owning the drug and how he broke his promise to stay clean, that this was just one time thing. Then he told y/n how his parents were preasuring him and Blair into future engagement, while things were falling apart and finally that he and Blair were no longer together.

"But how? Blair didn't tell me anything"

"She wanted you to hear it from me. And you know, we weren't exactly happy anymore"

"I'm so sorry Nate"

"You don't need to be, really. Blair and I are still going to be friends, so there's not gonna be any awkardness between the three of us"

"I'm glad" you smiled. "But Nate why didn't you come to me when things got like this?"

"You recently went through the break up and was i there for you?" Nate asked.

"Yeah you were, Nate."

"Y/n we had one conversation about it!" Nate laughed.

"Because I told you a thousand times Nate, the douchebag wasn't worth of more conversations! I didn't care for him that much to begin with, it was just a summer fling."

"But you seemed happy with him"

"Eh and when do I seem unhappy, huh? you asked Nate and shoved him playfully. Nate laughed. It was true. While you weren't exactly bubbly person, you hardly ever were seen upset. Of course you had your moments like any human being, but you brought calmness and good energy like a rainbow after storm.

"So anyway, you didn't need to take special care of me Nate, it's not like I was going through some breakdown and I was left alone. And next time something like that happens, you have to tell me, alright?"

"Yes m'am" he said. "So? We good?" he asked while looking into your eyes.

You were lost for a moment. You haven't thought about it in a while and now you were reminded how beautiful his eyes were.

"Yeah, we good" you replied.

Nate stayed for a minute then left saying that he wants to be with his mother as she needed him right now. You nodded and told him once again that you're here if he needs you, to which he jokingly rolled his eyes at you.

After he left you stared through the window for a couple minutes. You thought about everything Nate said to you today and suddenly it came down to you. When you were talking to him, you were entirely focused on his well being and listening to him to understand him. And now sudden way of sadness came over you. You felt the weight of the events that happened on your shoulders. That was some serious problems Nate was dealing with and he didn't tell you. You realized that in the past he called you when anything was on his mind. When him and Blair had even a small fight, he always asked you to mediate. Some guy played dirty at lacrosse practise? He met you after practise for coffee or something and was talking your ear off. And that was minor inconvince.

You were aware that your mind could play tricks on you, but you couldn't stop tears forming in your eyes and one awful thought that played in your brain like an alarm: your best friend hated you.

You fell on your bed, tears now streaming down your face. It's obvoious, you thought to yourself, Nate was drifting away, didn't tell you about his problems, because he didn't want your help anymore. Then a small voice tried to calm you by saying: Nate would never do that, but then you suddenly remembered what Nate said that day: "By I don't want to talk about it with anyone I meant you too. Especially you".

And that was it for you. The memory made you cry harder, your vision blurry as you stared at the celling. "Please, please, it can't be true" you whispered to yourself, your sobs getting quieter as you cried yourself to sleep.

reblogs and comments highly appreciated♡

natie's taglist: @luluartpop @lanawinterscigarettes

#nate archibald x reader #nate archibald fanfiction #nate archibald x you #nate archibald #nate archibald fanfic #gossip girl #gossip girl fanfiction #gossip girl imagine #nate archibald imagine #nate archibald angst #dividers by adornedwithlight

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amelikos · 1 month ago

Text

Some character notes and episode notes for HZ081, writing them down for future reference.

Liko and co go to the place in Area Zero where Entei is said to have been located. While they have lunch and discuss with Briar, Sango and Onyx are monitoring them from afar. As they start packing their things after lunch, Entei suddenly appears in front of the group but he looks different from the one they met in Johto. Entei does resonate with Pagogo, which confirms that it's Lucius's Pokemon. The other Heroes come out of their Pokeballs and eventually leave things to Liko. Liko reaches out to Entei and ask him to join them to go to Rakua. Entei will only join them and acknowledge them if they fulfill his condition, which is getting back Lucius's belt hidden in his fur.

Thus, they all decide to battle Entei. During the battle, they realize that Entei knows moves it's not supposed to know. They eventually realize that it's not an Entei, but a Paradox Pokemon: Gouging Fire. They continue the battle, which Dot is leading in terms of strategy. They end up getting back the belt and Gouging Fire acknowledges them. Pagogo shows the RVT and Briar a memory of the past, and they get to see Lucius playing with Gouging Fire in the past before he and Rystal renew their desire to go to Rakua.

Liko thanks Gouging Fire for joining them, and Roy gets excited as there is only Rayquaza left to find. As he says that, Pagogo reacts and all the Heroes come out of their Pokeballs and look up at the sky. Rayquaza has arrived.

Overall, liked the ep! Many things to cover as usual, I'll go out of order.

First, Sango and Onyx.

Not to be all "my ship had a kind of physical contact" but they had a kind of physical contact, so I need to point that out. And if they had to stay in Area Zero during the night, that means there is also the implication that they were camping together so that's also something worth thinking about. Shippy enjoyment aside, it keeps standing out to me that they gradually get even closer while everyone else in the Explorers are different? This kind of scenario (implication of camping, school, etc) can only be portrayed through them specifically. Even something as simple as physical contact is something that is exclusive to them so far? I don't recall any other characters in the Explorers having physical contact with each other (there is Amethio who held Liko's hand to help her, and she was someone outside the Explorers and this gesture was considered as treason). (Spinel is always spoiling/patting his Blacky, but that's a Pokemon and not a human.)

The whole scene with Sango telling Onyx not to give her orders was funny, and felt meaningful to me.. First, Sango reminded me of Amethio in HZ045 when he said the exact same thing to Friede ("don't give me orders"). So that's another parallel between Amethio and Sango. Onyx's delivery of his "we're on a mission" also kind of stood out to me.. Compared to that time in HZ044 when he felt a bit angrier when he told Sango not to idle around during the mission. In this ep, he feels judgemental but also like he knows this behavior is expected from her. Sango telling him not to boss her around also says a lot about her. It shows that she doesn't really have any interest in recon missions (the grander goal of the Explorers doesn't seem to be something she is interested in or even knows about). Usually, Sango ends up listening and following orders even when she initially complains.. Which made me realize that the previous times she did so, it was usually because there were characters like Agate around telling her what to do. It makes me think that she probably perceives Onyx as someone who is an "equal" to her, therefore she is not going to receive orders from him as if he was her superior. The fact that she talks back to him at all and isn't intimidated emphasizes that too. Sango throwing a jab at him, too.. Even though I like that they started arguing less than before after the school arc, I am also kinda happy that they still have the capacity to banter with each other. I always thought that the fact that they can act in such a familiar way around each other is one of those many elements that make them stand out as a duo among the Explorers. They are close enough to argue, talk back, spend a lot of time with each other, and also feel comfortable enough to be a bit vulnerable around each other sometimes, etc. It comes back to one of my train of thoughts about the comedy used around them, because I like the use of silly moments with them. It enhances and emphasizes specific aspects of their characters instead of being something that devalues them or make them grating? It humanizes them, stresses the fact that they don't really belong in the Explorers (compared to Spinel or Agate who seem to have deeper motives), the humor is used scarcely at appropriate times and as a tool to showcase the chemistry between both characters and reveals things about them, etc. And despite that, they are serious and competent opponents. I think it's good stuff.

Sango itching to join the battle also furthermore emphasizes that her only interest seems to be about getting to battle opponents and let loose in confrontations, it's probably her way to vent out her pent up energy. It makes me want to see more of her interactions with Roy. They built up a kind of rivalry around them, Roy is as excited when it comes to battles and he kept up with her before, etc. They play off each other in an interesting way, which is different from Sango's dynamics with Onyx. Roy is close friends with Liko and Dot, and seeing him interact with Sango (a girl who is a bit on the unhinged side) brings out sides of him we don't usually see either, which is fun to me. Like, their exchange in ep 43 when Sango was complaining about Liko and Roy "stealing" cakes from her ("Do you know how long I waited?!" "That's not our fault though :|".. Roy wasn't going to be "nice" to her about it and I thought it was fun).

Either way, I am curious what this small arc at Area Zero will mean for Sango and Onyx in the future. Sango befriended a Pokemon who willingly joined her (and it was cute to see Onipurin out in this ep too). Onyx seemed curious and surprised about the white dome that enveloped Liko and the others when Pagogo showed them a memory of the past. They both seemed surprised at seeing Rayquaza show up, too.

I think the plot around Entei's true identity was really interesting too. Pointing out that Paradox Pokemon are recent studies and a product of modern research, which explains why people from 100 years ago like Lucius wouldn't know about them. They called Entei as such because they simply assumed it was one. The buildup and the red herring with the previous Entei were good and Briar giving the explanations and analyzing in real time didn't feel out of place. Dot figuring out the truth at the same time as Friede and Briar was also a cool moment for her. She was on the same level as two professors!

I also liked that the flashbacks we've gotten from the Heroes who joined this arc felt personal to them. Basagiri's flashback was the first time he met Lucius, and when Lucius accepted him at a time he was rejected and feared by everyone. Gouging Fire's memory is a simple one: playing with Lucius. Which reframes the battle Liko and the others had with him in an effective way, because it used to be a kind of game he'd play with Lucius and something that allowed them to become closer. I like when Pokemon feel like beings with their own thoughts and feelings, and this made Gouging Fire really endearing to me. Same for Rayquaza. He showed up at the end. I think this implies that Rayquaza has probably been keeping a close eye on Liko and the others, watching over them and wait for them to become stronger, like a guide.. Rayquaza also showed up of his own volition at the end of HZ032 which was when Lapras joined the group and after Liko and co got three of the Heroes to join them. So he decided to show himself after they got half of the Heroes to potentially encourage them and see how they were faring.

The battle was fun and well coordinated. I like battles that aren't just about winning, and the test given by Gouging Fire made for interesting strategies. Dot being the main strategist and leading the others was really cool. Friede trusting her and letting her handle it felt significant. I feel like Friede could have come up with something himself, but he probably wanted to push and encourage Dot to grow further. Also a way to showcase that the trio is learning to stand alongside Friede as full equals even in battles, which is really nice to see. Roy's Achigator saving Cap was also a nice callback to the previous Entei battle in HZ078 when Cap had to save Achigator from being hit. Now, it was Roy's turn to save Cap.

I find it really compelling that Dot's growing passion for battles is directly tied into her character and interests, too. It's something I appreciate about the way the trio is handled. Their motivations are unique to their characters and fit them, instead of trying to make everyone fit the same mould. They are trying to portray "battles" differently for each of the characters. Liko learned to stop holding herself back, she learned to immerse herself in battles fully and grew more passionate, and it became a way for her to connect with her Pokemon's emotions. The depiction of Dot's passion for battles in this episode was tied to her curiosity about Pokemon themselves. She found them fun because it allowed her to learn about an unknown species of Pokemon and enrich and broaden her knowledge. She approached them from a professor perspective, which makes me think she could follow Friede's footsteps in this aspect too.. Anyway, the way battles are explored in Horizons is really interesting. There are many different reasons for battling, which go beyond the competitive stuff, but it also helps characters find a kind of common ground as they can have "fun" through it.

I am hoping that this isn't the last we see of Rystal either. I am glad we got to see her again with Lucius a little bit (especially knowing how things end and that she never got to see her beloved again).. It was also interesting seeing sides of Lucius we've never really seen before. Usually, the Six Heroes flashbacks emphasized his heroic aspects and felt more mysterious. Seeing him as someone who just loved playing around with his Pokemon felt like such a simple yet meaningful moment (and it was meaningful because Lucius did that so Entei could get used to him). I hope we get to see more of the original Explorers together.

The scene when Rayquaza showed up at the end was beautiful.. The music used during that scene was great too. I hope they release it someday in the next Horizons OST. They keep using great BGM when Rayquaza appears. I remember the one used in HZ044 really left an impact on me (for reference: it was the first 30 seconds of track 19 of the first OST here).

I wonder if we'll see a Pagogo flashback once Rayquaza joins the group? Gibeon wasn't in any of the flashbacks so far. Though the RVT have seen a picture of him in black and white when he was younger, so they should know what he looks like? He grew older since then though.

#hz081 #character notes #episode notes

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qnewsau · 2 months ago

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Queer artist Alex the Astronaut gets personal in new music

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/queer-artist-alex-the-astronaut-gets-personal-in-new-music/

Queer artist Alex the Astronaut gets personal in new music

Queer musician Alex the Astronaut is back with a new EP. She spoke to QNews about why this was her most personal work yet.

Sydney-born folk-pop singer and songwriter Alex the Astronaut has released their most personal project yet, a new EP Rage And All Its Friends.

This marks a career milestone, as for the first time Alex collaborates with renowned artists to expand and refine her sound and storytelling.

About Alex the Astronaut

Since their debut EP with To Whom It May Concern in 2017, Alex has gained significant success.

Her second EP, See You Soon, also released that year, earned them a J Award nomination for Unearthed Artist of the Year.

The track Not Worth Hiding, from the EP, became an unofficial rallying cry for Yes campaign in the Australian Marriage Law Postal Survey and reached no.23 on Triple J’s Hottest 100.

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Alex’s debut album, The Theory of Absolutely Nothing, charted at no.22 on the ARIA Album Chart in 2020, followed by How to Grow a Sunflower Underwater in 2022, both of which garnered ARIA Award nominations.

In May 2021, Alex was diagnosed with autism, and she’s been candid about her journey. Alongside music, she’s studying acting at the National Institute of Dramatic Art (NIDA).

We caught up with Alex to discuss their new music collaborations, their advocacy for LGBTQIA+ rights, and life beyond music.

Her new EP

Congratulations on the release of your new EP Rage And All Its Friends. It has been described as your most personal project yet, covering themes of grief, anger, and acceptance. How does it feel to be sharing such personal experiences?

It’s weird. Mostly I write a song and then I move on and forget what I felt until I go back to it. Now Rage.. is coming out I’ve gone back to all the songs and I’ve been very candid in these songs.

I think the most candid line is “My sister said slow down, why are you always so mad? And I said well why don’t you just shut up?.”

youtube

You incorporated co-writing into the creation of your new EP. How did it feel to share the creative songwriting process with others?

I usually don’t like it but I started getting bored of myself so I thought I should start to listen to how other people think.

The goal for the E.P. Was to write 50 songs. I ended up with 37 and most of those were co-writes from which my team and I picked the 6 songs that ended up being Rage and All It’s Friends.

Lisa Mitchell, Vlada Edirippulige, Paul Kelly, Benjamin Francis Leftwich, Angie Macmahon, Courtney Barnett, and so many others I got to work with. They changed my brain and how I worked forever.

Collaborations

Over your career, you have been often compared to Paul Kelly and you got to collaborate with the Aussie legend on the song Cold Pizza. What was it like working with Paul Kelly?

I shouldn’t be compared to Paul, he’s a genius. I’m a student. It was definitely one of the best days of my life.

Paul is generous and kind. He worked slowly and patiently with me for a few days. We had lunch together and chatted about our mornings and his dog sat in with us while we wrote. I loved it.

If You Have To Go is an absolute gem! You wrote the song during Troye Sivan’s World Pride writing camp. What was that experience like?

It was weird. I’ve never been in a group that was all queer at a songwriting camp. It was so diverse and comforting. I met so many new friends.

Troye is a very generous artist there was something really special about the camp he made. I got to play If You Have To Go for him at the playback dinner. He said he loved it. I will always remember that camp.

youtube

Your new EP features some exciting collaborations. Are there any dream artists or collaborators you’d love to work with in the future?

Phoebe Bridgers, Thelma Plum, and RAYE. I listen to their songs and always love them and always feel a bit jealous I haven’t written them so I’d love to sit down and understand what they know.

Life for Alex

Back in May 2021 you revealed that you were diagnosed with autism, and have been very open about it. Are there any misconceptions about autism that you wish people understood better?

I think [a misconception is] that autistic people are just rain men or people that don’t care about others.

I’m certainly not a rainman. I mostly can’t even remember the lyrics to my own songs.

And I think the misconception that autistic people don’t have empathy. Everyone I’ve met with autism is overflowing with empathy, and I think for me that’s why I write songs.

What is “gay life” like for you? How important is it for you to be involved in LGBTQIA+ advocacy or social causes?

I think it’s feeling safe in my community.

Being able to walk around without being scared that someone will want to hurt me because of who I am. It’s important to me because

I think that the progress we’ve had over the last few years feels fragile and we shouldn’t take what we have as a constant we need to keep showing up for each other.

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When you’re not writing music or on the road, what’s your ideal way to unwind or recharge?

I watch TV. Play sport, make food. I love snorkelling and swimming and bike riding around, hanging out with my friends and like to try everything and try get out of the house at least once a day.

But sometimes I just play Super Mario Wonder and sit on the couch.

The future

You hit the stage again with a series of shows across Australia this year. What was it like returning to live performances?

It was a strange familiarity. I’ve spent a year learning acting full time at NIDA. I think it’s in my nature to show off.

So it was fun to be up on stage showing off with my friends without having to pretend to be someone else and saying things I hadn’t written like I have this year.

I love these six songs. They’re really fun to play and they’re really special to me so I loved singing them with my band friends.

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What can we expect from Alex the Astronaut in 2025?

Who even knows, hopefully good things!

Alex the Astronaut’s new EP Rage And All Its Friends is out now. You can follow them @alex.the.astronaut on Instagram

Read next:

Meet the Brisbane queer band making waves: Worm Girlz

The Gold Coast queer musician taking on misogynistic “fans”

Meet Brisbane’s brightest queer breakout artist Hope D

The top 10 queer songs of 2024

Queer Aussie Artists you should be listening to

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

#Lesbian #troye sivan

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gobacktosleepsweet · 1 year ago

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The "idontwanttogotoschool" chronicles ep.1 :)

Hey....

Wake up...It's an usual school day.

But...what is a usual school day for me?

well....

I wake up at 6:30 a.m. Dutch time with 0 will to live, but i dont have anything better to do so i just wake up.

Next, I take a shower because that may be the only thing keeping me awake for the rest of the day.I take it fast and don't wash my hair, because i'm going out with fucking -4 degrees Celsius outside so wet hair is a big no. And of course, I don't have the patience to blow dry it.

Then I choose my outfit which is the same outfit as the day before (it's always stupid jeans, that are ripped even if as I said it's -4 degrees Celsius outside, a random hoodie, Jordans and my favorite necklace).I always stop with my pants half-way up to stare at my wall thinking "what the actual hell i'm doing with life?". After being called out by my mom for being slow,i finish getting dressed up and i run to get breakfast.

Breakfast: a meal eaten in the morning as the first meal of the day (Shotout to Cambridge). For me, it is simply milk poured into my 30002938-year-old mug, with 5 biscuits inside.Yep, that's my breakfast.

Then I have literally 20 seconds of peace, 'cause between brushing my teeth, brushing my hair, taking asthma meds, and preparing my backpack cuz I was too lazy to do it the night before, it's already 7:40 a.m., as known as the time I leave for school.

So, let's start with the fact that I am indeed lucky. I live in the rural zone of my city, in a building full of immigrants, as I am, in fact, an immigrant myself. But despite that (NOT SAYING THAT IF YOU LIVE IN A RURAL ZONE YOU ARE UNLUCKY OR WTV) , i'm lucky, because almost everyday i go to school by car with one of my parents, and i have access to everything i ask for.Anyways, that not the point. By the time i was talking to you, i arrived at school.

As soon as i arrive i run to the only person i know that arrives earlier than me: Lara. Lara is literally one of the people I see the most at school because, despite her being of a different friend group, she's my deskmate (if such a thing exists lol), so we talk during ALL THE LESSONS. Anyway, as soon as I reach her, she asks for my phone. Ever since I got an iPhone 15 as a gift, my phone became her property. She knows my password, she uses it daily, but that's alright, she's my friend anyway.

Then, there's Matilde. She's been there way more time than Lara. But I don't go up to her. She's older, and her other friends are older too, so I feel embarrassed. But 2 minutes before getting to class, she comes up to me on her own and just starts telling me all the juicy gossip drama or whatever, and I listen to it, not cause I love gossip, but it is because she's my friend. Anyways that's one of my favorite parts of the day, because Matilde is beautiful.

It's 8 a.m right now, and my BORING school day started. It really doesn't matter which subject it is, everything bores me.Thank god i have Lara by my side, Eva and Mathilda behind, and Giorgia in front. I literally chat or draw during the entire lesson and then...

9.45 a.m, it's recess and I go to my chosen friend group of the day, cuz im unstable as fuck haha. I usually steal other people's snacks, even if I have mine (I don't tell them). Then,it's time for other boring lessons and then another break, so i'll skip to the end of the school day.

It's 2 p.m,and from this point,things are pretty different each day

MONDAY

Recapping,i have flute lessons go home at 3.45, gym at 5,00 and then i have my night routine

TUESDAY

Italian extra lessons, home at 4.00 and i'm done.

OTHER DAYS:

i go to this place after school where i lunch, do my homework, or atleast i'm supposed to cause i literally use my phone.

P.S:it's full of nuns

P.P.S: Matilde goes there too :)

Now, it's 7 p.m, and i'm at home having dinner.Sometimes my family isn't at home for dinner,so i have dinner alone with my sister.After dinner i use my phone or read.At 20.30 i'm setted to sleep,but i start overthinking about very random stuff.Then,i fall asleep.

Usually i wake up at 2 a.m for various reasons:

1.I need water more than everything

2.I need to pee

3.I just woke up and now i can't fall back asleep

After this,the cycle restarts,and this goes up 5 days a week.

Well folks of tumblr, this is my usual school day,hope you disliked it as much as i do,se ya next post

bye

Oh right this shit was wrote with Grammarly on a late night with annoying kids at home

Btw I ain't sponsoring Grammarly, it's all paying and no english

#shitpost #random #school

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lost-on-kamino · 3 years ago

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Records

Changing the Disk

A brief interlude before we continue our scheduled playlist

(It’s been a while! But i finally picked up speed again for this part of Rhythm’s story, though it’s now a look over the other side of things... Please don’t hate me, Eps is already hunting me-) Small Cameos by: Remedy ( @kkrazy256) Twitch ( @gaeasun) , Sponge and Olly (@mwolf0epsilon)

The wind was calmer today, Pitch found as he peered from the building. He scratched his beard as he looked back to the sleeping brothers and sisters and siblings, recovering from their time in the front.

Granted he had been requested to stay with Coric as Kix and Twitch went off following the ‘Chosen One’.

Sure, Pitch trusted the man; but he often found Slick’s words rotating. He hadn’t been deployed for Christophis… But he heard the stories.

It had left him a lot of time to think when he was on watch as Coric caught up on some much needed sleep. The older Medic had decided to keep watch over him which was its own blessing in disguise… as much as he did annoy his ori’vod from his habit of bringing food into the Medbay.

You named it; Berries, cookies, fruit, chips, lollies; Pitch had brought it in to help his family feel more at ease. It was a quirk he called it… from past experiences of- Actually he didn’t want to think about it… He just always had food around, just in case. Always on hand.

He rubbed his face, likely smudging it with dirt as he kept his focus and leaned back on his perch. Pitch kept a silent watch, a soft smile on his face.

He could hear the distant roar of blasters and cannons in the trees and hoped they’d have time to evacuate if it came to it. Though he wondered how his brother lost on Coruscant was… Pitch only heard the news from the newly formed ARF Trooper, Bumblebee who had transferred from the 212th… Pitch had gotten to be good friends with him before his incident on Coruscant; which he then transferred to to keep with the Medic who was monitoring him.

Pitch shared it with his older siblings. Beat had cursed and remained off line, likely blowing steam over not being able to keep her promise while Tacet remained levelled headed and kept mediating between their siblings.

He felt a hand brush his hair and a whisper.

“He’s home.”

Pitch turned to his right, spotting no one as he narrowed his eyes. But the tone and… that feeling… That felt like Chord. Rhythm’s twin would always brush his hair and even joked about the former pilot to change his hair style. Pitch relaxed into his seat, Coric walking over and offering a canteen as Sponge joined them.

He had a feeling… It was ok.

Beat was keeping up with the other members of the Wolfpack. Though she could tell they were watching her, after her outburst in the training room. Fight after fight, keeping her head down. Any clone that offered to spar would be pummelled until Commander Wolffe got hold of her. It was not until after General Plo had offered to duel her and destroyed her that she admitted the words that prayed on her mind.

My Vod is missing.

Until then, nothing had really changed, but she could tell Boost and Sinker would join her in morning sprints as they made their way towards another relief mission. Comet sat with her during lunch and talked to her, Warthog would ask for her help looking over the ships and Wildfire kept her busy with inventory. They were all keeping her busy and away from a path of self destruction.

What had meant to most was when Wolffe sat down with her and asked why she felt so strongly that it was her fault. That was when she told him about Chord.

That it was her push and plan that caused the explosives to rattle the citadel challenge, Chord was the medic and rushed to save Rhythm, his twin and was bludgeoned to death.

She was the eldest. She needed to watch her siblings and protect them, that was her promise to Chord. And Chord helped her work out who she was. Wolffe had simply listened and thanked her for letting him learn about Chord. That Chord would be proud of her growth and he wouldn’t blame her as they were all following orders… and sometimes, it doesn’t go all to plan.

You lose everything and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.

You watch as everyone dies around you yet continue to live when the Captain should have gone down with the ship.

You can only watch as your remaining brothers fight with your general and you can only hope whatever force is out there. The one who could barely breathe as the Escape pod came close to releasing the precious air as you called for help, locating the one person who was close to your battalion as a sister.

Then the wait as you and your remaining two brothers recover, hoping for the news of sweet revenge as the wolf’s fangs to kill off the one who had taken so much from you.

Beat could listen in quiet horror, realising she could relate to her commander more than she knew. That was the day she swore her loyalty to the pack. It was when Beat had returned to training; slow punches as Sinker cheered her on; she felt a tremor.

A distant humming on the breeze.

A song that she and Chord would hum, copied from their trainers, to ease their brothers.

He’s home.

His voice sung softly as Beat stumbled in her next punch and fell to the floor, catching herself as Sinker knelt by her. She sobs, tucking herself in as the Wolfpack surrounds her. Wolffe walks in and knows as Warthog dashes in like a hot landing, holding a chat message likely from his Batchmate, Hound.

It will be okay.

Tacet found themselves watching as the transport ship took them back to the Negotiator. The ARF Trooper sinking slightly in which knowing he had done his darn hardest to look for his batchmate. As the second eldest… it was his duty.

They heard their name as Boil waved and they quickly clipped their helmet to sign back ‘Hello’, waving their hand.

“Any luck?” Boil questioned as they walked towards their stations. Tacet shook their head.

They held their hands to their chest and shook them, mouthing the word.

‘Nothing’

Boil pulled Tacet close.

“They’ll find something.” He reassured as Waxer soon joined them and the three slowly chatted quietly among themselves. They had worked out what Tacet had been doing when he quietly returned to the barracks late in the Coruscant night and they had also kept an eye out for Tacet’s vod’ika.

The ARF Trooper stretched from his position at the desk, looking over the channels for distress calls, Boil and Waxer within his group before the big jump to their next battlefield. The thing is with Tacet, would be that the thoughts would linger in his mind, circling.

Was there more they could have done? Did they search hard enough for Rhythm? And those thoughts would remain until he knew about his Vod’s whereabouts. He sunk slightly, a nudge from Waxer and an soft smile pressed him on. Boil looked over and muttered about getting Caf for the three, moving off as Tacet paused at a message that flicked on his comm channel.

Olly.

Waxer saw Tacet frozen and peered over. It had been sent about 10 minutes ago and Tacet was hovering over the channel. But it wasn’t the fear of checking. A soft murmur had rattled his mind.

You know its good news, Tacet.

“Easy, Vod.” Waxer smiled, taking the place of Chord as Tacet flinched and looked over, rapidly apologising. Waxer took the lead and pressed the channel.

When Boil returned, the sight of Tacet leaning into Waxer’s arms, face hidden and arms trembling; he knew Rhythm would be alright.

It was perfectly okay.

Rhythm curled up in his covers, head down as he prepared himself for another day.

Tomorrow he’d catch up with Lenta and the kids, something he looked forward to as he needed to return Vite’s Massif plush. Remedy had cleared him finally to start heading out again after his leg was fixed up despite the scarring around the knee and shin.

He smiled to himself.

Everything should be back to normal again, he can return calls and catch people out in their language… He would patrol with Bumblebee and Bulkhead to get used to stretching his leg in armor…

Everything was good.

…

Blank eyes shot open late at night. The buzzing of the room and soft snores of the other guardsmen hummed in the air as CT-2895 prepared and suited himself up.

He paused when he saw the Riot Trooper shift in his bed, turning to walk off.

He froze again when he stepped on something. Looking down at what appeared to be a stuffed Massif, he stared blankly before pressing down more and walked off into the night, helmet on tight.

After all, Good soldiers follow orders.

#star wars #the clone wars #tcw #coruscant guard #clone oc #communications corrie rhythm #clone medic pitch #arf trooper tacet #arc trooper beat #riot trooper olly olly oxenfree #clone medic sponge #clone medic twitch #basically many clones help #mostly background #the records collection #there is no clonecest this is all platonic i swear if anyone comes in and says i will stab #rogue writings

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heyitsyn · 4 years ago

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Keeping Up With Seijoh Ep. 6

a/n: DKFJSLDKFSJ OMG YOU GUYS IVE LTR BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS FOR SO LONG AACCKKK!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

also, omg im screeching bc BAHAHAHA THERE IS GOING TO BE A SLIGHT PLOT TWIST YOU GUYS!!!!!

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon:

- Ever since yn got lost during a trip to another school, the team made the rule that she has to hold one of their hands. Its probably so small compared against the boys. She got lost cause babie saw a cat

SKDLFJLSDKFJ EWWWWWWWW IM SCREECHING IN DISGUST RIGHT NOW LIKE THATS SO DIS COS TANG OIKAWA TOORU LIKE LEAVE MY GUY ALONE!!!!!!! #LETMAKKILIVE

lmao yep this is really happening

okay so anyways

you guys know how seijoh is like known around the prefecture right?

and we all know that nekomata and old ukai are like besties so they were talking over the phone right

and nekomata was complaining that his players were already fed up with playing against the same people and they wanted to be challenged and wanted new exposure to other players and all that jazz

old ukai was cackling at the other side bc haha youre actually begging me to find you new teams now?

but anyways

theyre like besties forever so ofc old ukai would help

and by help, he turned to poor zaddy keishin and told him to look for teams that could be sent up to tokyo and play against nekoma

‘what?! im already busy and i dont have time to scout-’

‘YOU WATCH YOUR TONGUE BOY! I CREATED YOUR FATHER AND WITHOUT HIM, YOU WOULDNT BE HERE TODAY!’

‘BOLD OF YOU TO ASSUME I WANTED TO BE ALIVE IN THE FIRST PLACE!’

family goals 😍😍😍

but keishin still listened to his grandfather and recommended seijoh as being the one to go as they are one of the hardest to beat opponents in the preferecture

but its more like he wants to hear about nekoma being destroyed by oikawa’s service aces and grovel at their feet since naoi always made fun of them saying country boys arent as good as city boys

LIKE PLEASE

anyways!!!!!!

nekomata got word of it and immediately phoned aoba johsai and talked to the coach

‘yes, i heard from an old friend of mine that you are quite strong’

nekomata praised, wanting and desperate to have them come up

‘and do you think your team is good enough to beat us?’

LMAO YESSSS GRANDPA IRIHATA!!! DRAG THEM KITTIES!!!!

WAIT NO THAT SOUNDS WRONG

but they settled on their disagreements and decided yep they were going to go up there and have a practice match

however

irihata and nekomata wanted their boys to be kept in the dark about who this team is as knowing them, they have sources to find them tapes of old plays

they wanted it to be a fair match

even the managers were being kept from it as they could easily be influenced by the players for that information

irihata walked into the gym and announced a team meeting to which they stopped

you sat down next to kyotani, who pulled you beside him and wrapped a protective arm around your waist

‘we have a practice match against a prominent team up in tokyo in 3 days. make sure you have your plays right and pat down as they are known to be quite an opponent’

the boys shouted a determined cheer and they all hussled back to practice

you were running around, tending to everyone with towels or medical tape

once you finally sat back down on the bench, you noticed your phone screen light up, indicating someone sent you a message

it was natsu

you swiped open and smiled softly at his picture

it a selfie of him in front of his school as you told him to send you a picture that he arrived safely

‘got here in one piece since im not ready to meet daddy satan yet’

i hate him you guys

after receiving news of his mother gaining custody of him, he cheered and was able to go back to tokyo without his father in the picture

lets just say,,, hes not nice

anyways

you were sad to let him go but you understood he missed his friends and his almost-boyfriend so you were able to say goodbye easily at the station

‘gross but im pretty sure katsuki would blow satan to smithereens’

‘hehe ;) he would’

‘N A S T Y’

you cringed but giggled and the team noticed so they tried hard to gain your attention back on them

‘aaa!!!!! y/n-chan!!! my leg!!!!’

‘i think i chopped off my finger!!!!’

‘my head snapped off my body!!!!!’

you rolled your eyes and placed your phone down before walking over to mattsun to help him snap his head back on his neck

finally, it was the day of the match

you were arranged to stay the night at tokyo to have a few practice matches with this unknown team

the team was arranged to meet at the train station at 9:45 since the train leaves at 10

you arrived the earliest to keep track of everyone and just because you were actually kinda excited

theres this weird feeling in your stomach that isn’t exactly bad but its,,, giddy

you sat on the bench, waiting for the team

they all started arriving one by one and you were doing a headcount for everyone but you were missing one

you checked your phone and you noticed he was getting late

it was already 9:54

you hate it when people are late to meeting time so you were slightly irritated

you dialed up your captain’s number and you stood up, pacing around

‘hello~~~~ y/n-cha-’

‘oikawa-san! do you know what time it is?! you were arranged to come here at specifically 9:45 but its 14 minutes passed that so where the hell are you? you better have a good excuse you piece of-’

‘aww y/n-chan oikawa-san is sorry’

someone whispered in your ear from behind and you flinched, surprised at the sudden person

oikawa wrapped an arm around your waist while his other hung up the call and you turned around, arms crossed while pouting at him

‘sorrysorrysorry!’

he apologized and you rolled your eyes

‘i swear, oikawa-san. if i find out it was because of your hair again-’

‘oi shittykawa! your sister just called me and you left the curling iron on, you stupid bastard!’

iwaizumi’s shout made oikawa sweat and pale

your eyes glinted dangerously

‘this is the last straw, oikawa-san’

you growled and he shot down to his knees and was about to start praying to you when the coach decided he had enough entertainment for the day and called everyone to gather around

‘heres your tickets. this train will get us there around lunch time so dont worry about getting hungry’

the shinkansen train had 2-person seating so everyone fought secretly amongst each other to sit next to you

literally, their private group chat was blowing up until early this morning at the shouts and yells of everyone caps locking their arguments as to why they deserve to sit next to you

the only one who didnt was mattsukawa issei

bc quite frankly, he didnt care who he sat next to and although it sounds nice to be next to you, he isnt exactly the comfiest to sleep on due to the obvious size difference

lmao like your head probably wouldnt reach his shoulders bruh

now youre not oblivious

or blind

so you noticed the glares of everyone as you all stood for the train to come

and you also noticed mattsun just standing there, bored, so you sneaked over to him, wrapping your arms around him

‘arent you excited, mattsun-san?’

he gasped quietly at your sudden appearance but he smirked

‘its nothing special. just another team that we’re going to beat’

you giggled at his confidence and you walked in front of him so you could properly be held by him

it was practically second nature now by the way he just opened his arms and you crashed into them, his own wrapping around your shoulders to hold you tight

‘i love your confidence so much mattsun-san’

he flushed red and furrowed his eyebrows, head turning to the side to hide the obvious effect you had on him

‘whats the point of playing when you cant be confident’

‘aaaa why are you looking away mattsun-san!!!’

lmao when the team saw you sitting next to mattsun, they all felt so betrayed like bruh

ltr kyo and iwa were about to go feral

oikawa was like ready to screech his ass off but one look from you made him shut up

‘i sincerely, really, truly hope youre just complaining about the seat hurting your flat ass, oikawa-san’

KDFJLSDKFJSDL Y/N NO STOP IT

it was kinda funny actually bc everyone was all pouting and sulky while you just have mattsun who’s smirking like ‘beat that’

SDKFJLSDKF I LOVE MATTSUN’S SMIRK LIKE PLEASE OMG

ofc he let you sit at the window bc you love window seats

like iwa, he also pulls up the arm barrier thingy and you shuffle closer to him and mattsun practically combusts

the ride isnt expected to be very long but you still found yourself sleeping during it

mattsun has his arm around your shoulder while your head is leaning against his peck man boobie

omg its so cute like he actually slides lower on the seat to help you reach his shoulder and hes slouching and back is hurting just for you

;’)

he was awake the whole time bc he couldnt sleep with his heart beating so hard it might rip out of his chest

ew thats kinda gorey

your hand was gripping his own and to pass time, he found himself fiddling with your fingers

an unknown smile appeared on his face at the obvious size difference between yours and his

a finger traced different and foreign shapes just to feel the softness of your hand and he combusts again when you unconsciously squeeze his hand

mattsun couldnt help but bring your linked hands up and kiss the back of yours

it was soft, gentle, and his lips lingered there for more than a second

then a sudden feeling of fatigue washed over him and he leaned his cheek against the top of your head

the last thing he remembers is the smell of your f/s (favorite smell) shampoo

then you guys arrived in tokyo

irihata had to personally wake you all up because even naoi fell asleep and everyone fell asleep

irihata gently shook mattsun awake and when the boy opened his eyes, the older man nodded over to your form

‘gently wake her up’

as if mattsun didnt already know

thats why he softly ran the pad of his thumb on your cheek that was exposed to the air

‘y/n~~’

he coos and your nose twitches, in between the border of dreams and reality

‘darling, wake up, baby bear’

FSDKLFJSDLKSDJKFJDSKLFJSDLFKSJDLF YOU GUYS I CANNNNTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

also im listening to kataomoi by aimer so that kinda influences the ‘darling

his deep voice that surprisingly reaches a level of quietness made your eyes flutter

your whole face scrunched at suddenly being woken up but the sight of mattsun’s genuine smile made you mirror it and cuddle closer for an extra dose of warmth

‘hmm, is my baby tired?’

he teasingly whispers and you nodded, snuggling even further and he gently cups your face

his hold had made your cheeks squeeze slightly together and your pout increased the cute factor

‘nwoooo dont skweeze demmm’

you slurred and he chuckled

‘hai hai’

‘kwiss it better’

you demanded and he full on laughed before moving his hands to your jaws so he could plant many kisses on your cheeks

the repeated kisses tickled so you giggled and squirmed

‘aaaaaa mattsun-san it tickles!!!’

your playful protests forced him to stop and allow you to actually sit up

as usual, your hair was a bird’s nest and mattsun attempted to settle it out

‘hah, y/n-chan your hair is like another being itself’

he choked out and you pouted at him

‘so mean! mattsun-san is so mean! baba-san! rescue me!!’

yahaba was known in the team to be the one who fixed your hair and you trusted him the most with it

hearing his name being called, the pretty boy dashed towards you and mattsun’s seats

‘is senpai giving you trouble again? come, honey, come to baba-san’

mattsun gave him a look for the younger’s passive agressive tone

oikawa immediately dashed over right next to yahaba

‘oh? y/n-chan! oikawa-san is here!!’

iwa and kyo growled

‘SHUT UP SHITTYKAWA!’

meanwhile irihata and naoi were just done

they just wanted to get off the train like is that such a big favor?

finally!!!!

seijoh was able to actually make it to the city and ngl, despite living in sendai, you were actually overwhelmed by the bustling city of tokyo

there were people all over the place and many cars and you were being pushed around

it didnt help that it was ltr lunch hour and a flurry of business people just flooded out of their buildings

you unconsciously gripped your bag and focused on just not tripping over people so your eyes were trained on your feet

then in the corner of your eye, you saw a tiny animal that was in danger of being stepped on so you ofc had to go chase after it

you shouted at some people to watch out and to not step on it

but then it disappeared

the moment you looked up, everyone was gone

you panicked and your head was turning from side to side

‘MATTSUN-SAN?! IWA-SAN?! KYO-SAN?!’

you shouted but it seems your voice wasnt loud enough

GIRL YOU GOTTA MANIFEST THAT BULLHORN VOICE

worry and dread bubbled inside of you but you stopped, just trying to calm down and think

then you saw the flash of white again so you hurriedly ran after it, not knowing that you were straying away from the city and towards the suburbs

you noticed you were now lost at the less amount of feet walking and this wasnt the city and you were now away from the team

taking yoru eyes off of the cat, you looked around to confirm your fear and that gave the cat an opportunity to disappear again

yoo crookshanks

huffing a curse, you pulled your phone out of your bag and dialed each

your phone wasnt reaching the boys and no one was picking up

what the heck

you ended up at some quieter and less crowded spot

like a neighborhood

you contemplated calling natsu as he lived in tokyo but tokyo was a big city and you were at some neighborhood so its highly unlikely he would know where you are

so you just walked around, looking for a place to sit and think like a park

then you heard a distressed meow

you were just walking and hearing that loud cry of help made you stop and immediately follow the sound

‘kitty? kitty?’

you called out even though you knew fully well they didnt understand you

but the cat cried even louder and you heard another cat

it was less higher pitched and honestly, you just felt like there was another cat

as you looked around, you saw the same cat you followed after and it bobbed its head at you as if asking you to follow him

‘you want me to go with you?’

the cat blinked then turned around and started walking

‘okay then’

you took the time to inspect the actual color of the cat

it was dominantly white furred but it had multiple colored spots, mainly yellow and brown

you eventually ended up at a large tree with a cat shivering on the biggest branch

it was black and had some fur sticking out at the top of its head and it looked young so its probably a kitten

you tutted and reached out your hand but it recoiled, hissing at you

BOI SHE TRYING TO HELP YOU WHAT

‘hey, i want to help you’

you softly said and maybe youre just doctor dolittle?

bc it stopped hissing and started whining instead

‘kenma-san! i swear i saw it just now-’

a sudden foreign voice made the black haired cat hiss again and this time, even you were counted as a threat

the appearance by the corner of two boys made you glare at them

one was freakishly tall with grey hair and scary green eyes while the other was shorter and had bleached hair that grew out

they both wore running shorts and black shirts and they looked like they were on a run or something

then you had a thought

this guy was tall

he could help

‘hey! you!’

you waved and the boys stopped, eyes wide

they pointed to themselves and you nodded

‘yes, silly! especially the tall one!’

the other had a flash of a glare that disappeared almost immediately but the ‘tall one’ happily skipped over

‘oho, hello chibi-chan’

KDFJSLDFKSDJLFDKSJ YES IM CONDENSCENDING

you puffed your cheeks out in anger at the nickname but this was not the time

‘that kitty up there is stuck. and i cant help it because its scared. and its all the way up there’

you pointed and he nodded

‘i followed that cat here too but i needed someone else. thats why i brought kenma-san’

your eyes shifted to ‘kenma-san’ who was focused on the other cat who also stared back at his spot by the tree

hmmm, they look kinda similar

‘well! we need to help it,,,,,, grandpa-san!’

taken aback by the nickname, the tall guy gasped while the blonde boy choked out a sudden laugh and you giggled

‘GRANDPA?!’

‘yea. you know cus you have gray hair’

you reasoned and he was about to retort when he stopped himself

‘no. we have more important matters in hand. kenma-san, come stand on my shoulders. chibi, use my jacket to catch it if it falls’

you scrambled to do your task but you heard kenma-san mumble

‘you cant tell me what to do’

‘oh hey! whats your name?’

you asked and the tall guy waved

‘im lev. haiba lev. first year’

‘kozume,,, kenma. im a second year’

‘oh! then nice to meet you! im l/n y/n!’

introductions had to be cut short as you all assembled

kenma wobbled while lev cringed at the obvious pain but they gritted their teeth and kenma lunged to grab the cat

but the cat jumped away, falling to the ground where it was caught safely by you

thankfully the jacket saved you from scratching but after a few soft whispers of reassurance, the kitty calmed down and it resulted in just shaking

‘its okay. we’re okay. i got you’

you were completely oblivious to the fact that kenma and lev were on the ground, bleeding after falling, or the shout at the distance

‘kenma! lev!’

‘Y/N-CHAN!’

you three turned to see two groups of boys coming from two directions

on the right had a guy with black hair similar looking to the cat on your arms

while the left had your familiar looking captain

‘oikawa-san!’

you shouted and he ran up, eyes wide with worry

‘where were you?! why did you run off?! you shouldn’t-’

he rambled but your eyes stopped at the appearance of your familiar pink-haired cousin

‘natsu?!’

you shrieked and he had an equally surprised expression

‘y/n?!’

he shouted

‘what-!’

he started but you beat him to it

‘why are you here?!’

you pointed to the people behind him

‘im,,, a manager. im a manager for my volleyball team’

‘volleyball,,,’

you trailed off

‘VOLLEYBALL?! NEKOMA?!’

you knew of your cousin’s school but you didnt think you guys would meet here

‘shes your cousin?’

someone piped up from the back and natsu nodded, still looking at you

‘oya? the apple doesnt fall far from the tree, then. hello gorgeous, the names kuroo tetsurou’

KSLDFJDSK I HATE THIS LIKE PLEASE HES JUST A NERD YET I WRITE HIM LIKE THIS I HATE MYSELF

‘HAH?! YOU BACK OFF!’

kyotani started but you caught him in time, holding him in your arms

‘nooo,, calm down, kyo-san’

natsu’s nose crinkled and his mouth curled

‘ugh, nice to see you too, brat’

‘BRAT?! YOU BASTARD!’

‘IM A THIRD YEAR, YOU BASTARD!’

kyotani was held back by oikawa and iwa while your cousin was with that kuroo guy and lev

you hurried back to the rest of the team and they each glared at you but they had an obvious expression of relief

‘do that again y/n-’

‘i know, makki-san. youll use a leash backpack’

lets just say its not,,, the first time youve been lost

‘new team rule. youre holding someone’s hand at all times. no matter what, always hold us’

yahaba scolded and watari nodded

meanwhile, mattsun grabbed your hand and gripped it tight

‘youre never leaving my sight again’

his tone was different from his usual playful and teasing voice

you knew he was very worried and that made you feel really guilty

‘im sorry’

you whispered and he pulled you to him, hugging you tightly

‘its okay. youre here right now and thats all that matters’

you nodded and you turned your head, leaning on his chest to watch oikawa yelling and shouting at this kuroo guy while your cousin and kyo were arguing and you chuckled

this was,,, chaos

‘dear god, you shouldve let me be lost for a few more hours’

you mumbled, smiling lightly when mattsun’s chest vibrated as he laughed

‘take me with you next time’

‘i will’

you hummed

‘Y/N-CHAN! YOU ARE NOT GOING NEAR THIS-THIS MONGREL!’

oikawa screeched, stomping his way over to you

you smirked

‘oi kuroo-san! lets hang out after the match!’

oikawa screamed

a/n: now that my nekoma manager is out, i can finally have a manager x manager interaction and uwuwuwuwu just wait until i finish the others and ill do that req anon sent in ;) if you sent it in, you know what im talking about ;)

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onestowatch · 3 years ago

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For Griff, Vulnerability Is the Only Way to Cut Through the Noise [Q&A]

Photo: Zachary Chick

Griff may have just turned 21, but for the last few years, her life has been anything unlike the average 20-year-old’s. Since releasing her debut EP in 2019, the British singer-songwriter has put out a sophomore effort, won Rising Star at the Brit Awards, and is set to join Dua Lipa’s 2022 ‘Future Nostalgia’ tour. Most recently, she released her well-received collaboration, “Head on Fire,” which also features the up-and-coming Norwegian artist, Sigrid.

Best known for her reflective yet catchy pop songs, Griff draws on inspiration from her childhood and current experience to create a narrative that one can find meaning in at any stage of life. She candidly writes on themes that are deeply personal, yet incredibly relatable, allowing her music to evolve with her audience. We were privileged enough to sit down with Griff and talk all things touring, vulnerable songwriting, and what it means to come into your own.

youtube

Ones to Watch: Congratulations on your US tour! How has your time in New York been so far?

Griff: Thank you! How’s it been? Oh my god, it's so cold here. (laughs) But no, it's been amazing. I’m trying to remember, so we landed in New York and did a show, and it was amazing. Then we went to D.C. and then went back and did a second show in New York. It feels surreal to be back here. It feels really surreal to be doing my first American tour.

I saw you asked for lunch recommendations the other day. Did you find something extraordinary to eat?

I didn’t have loads of time, so I was looking for places near me. I went to Dudley’s. It was a nice brunch spot. I went to Scar’s Pizza. I’ve also had Prince Street Pizza.

So, in terms of coming into your career, is there an experience or memory that affirmed your decision to pursue music?

I don’t know, I’ve always loved music. I’ve grown up in church and that was always a really encouraging space for me to fall in love with music. And I think I always really just liked writing songs. I was always writing songs when I wasn’t in school. I was always learning chords to my favorite songs. Yeah, so I feel like I don’t have one big revelation moment; I think it’s just something that evolved and grew and was always inside of me.

Has growing up half-Chinese, half-Jamaican influenced your creative process and how you approach songs?

I think on the creative side, that's definitely my Black, Jamaican roots. I grew up a lot listening to Black and soul music. My dad is super musical, and I think that music and soul is definitely a large part of Black culture, so that’s kind of bled into what I do. And I think my Chinese side has given me a work ethic. Even watching my mom immigrate to London and going super working class to move us out and building a whole life for the family out of nothing, I think there’s something in the Chinese mentality where you do just make something out of nothing and you do work really hard until you see results. I think it’s kind of a perfect combination.

During your songwriting process, do you largely draw from personal experiences or do you find that you take inspiration from outside of yourself?

I think it’s a bit of both. Because it’s not everyday, when you’ve come to write a song, you feel like you have something really personal and detailed to say, but some days you do. I think the best songwriters can draw inspiration from anywhere and still tell a story that feels very personal. So, I think it's a bit of both, it really depends where I’m at.

I’m sure it’s quite a challenge to be so raw and vulnerable in your songwriting. Was there ever a time when you were hesitant to share your music with the world?

I always feel hesitant to share music with the world. I think if it were up to me, all my music would just stay on my laptop and I’d never release it, because I’m constantly overthinking. I never feel like anything is ready, and I never feel like anything is good enough. Honestly, every single release, I’m incredibly hesitant.

What helps you continue to find the courage to share that more vulnerable side of you?

I think the best songs are the vulnerable ones. There’s a lot of talent out there, and a lot of incredible singers and songwriters. I think the ones that move you are the ones that are most honest and vulnerable. It's kind of not really a choice, you just have to make sure that you’re writing stuff that cuts through the rest of it and being honest is the way that you do it.

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Do you feel that the creative process differed at all between One Foot In Front Of The Other and The Mirror Talk?

I think it did change, but not intentionally. There were still a lot of similarities, like I think it's all still this bedroom pop-ish, synth-based honest songwriting, so that front will always be there. What I’m writing about has changed and hopefully my songwriting has gotten a little bit better, but I don’t think I’ve been conscious in making them sound different or the same, it’s more up to other people to judge that.

When relistening back to older projects, do you feel that you still relate to the themes that you wrote about, or does it seem like a distant memory now?

I think a bit of both. I don’t tend to listen to a lot of the songs that I once wrote, I think I’ll probably listen to them and wish that I did things differently or produce them differently. But I think in any songs you can find your own meaning in them and in new ways.

One Foot In Front Of The Other is all about walking through life. Do you feel like there is a certain theme to this particular walk of life that you’re in?

I think my headspace is very much that 2022 is looking like a lot of touring, so that's kind of where I’m at right now. I’m figuring that out, and I’ve only just started. I feel like that’s my next challenge that I haven’t really experienced a lot of yet.

I know that you’ve had to postpone your UK tour, which I'm sure was heartbreaking for you. Now that you’re on an international tour, I’m sure it must feel surreal.

It feels really crazy. I think it's very difficult as well for artists to tour and to say that they’ve sold out tours and that kind of thing, especially in this climate, so I’m feeling very very grateful to be here. I know that this isn’t something that comes by very often. It’s just crazy to see people actually show up and to see rooms packed.

Speaking on your Against the Clock series, is there a particular collaboration that you were especially proud of or that has stood out to you?

I loved the Maisie Peters one, just because Taylor saw that one and that really did stick out. This one is probably one of the less popular ones, but I did one with Conor Albert, who is a really talented UK musician and producer. We did Phoebe Bridgers’ “Kyoto” and that was really fun. He is just incredibly talented.

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Speaking of Taylor Swift, what did it feel like to receive such high praise from someone that you’ve looked up to since you were young?

Really insane. Like really really crazy. I think the first time that I met her, it was really surreal and she was very complimentary. But you kind of start convincing yourself, like of course she’d be nice, you have to be, we’re at an award show, you have to be complimentary, that’s apart of what the chat is, but it was when she put my mixtape on her story, because she doesn’t post a lot at all. I remember that day because I didn’t even expect to see any reviews, but I remember I saw one that wasn’t that amazing, but then Taylor Swift put that on her story literally within a few hours after and I was like it’s fine because Taylor likes it.

Is there anything that you particularly want to do while you're in the US?

No, I just want to eat good food, I feel like you guys have good restaurants that are way better than London. I would like to go to what we call charity shops but what you call thrift stores. What else? Yeah, I think those are the top two things.

Happy belated birthday! Being in your 20s is such an exciting time. Is there anything in particular that you want to attract or manifest this year?

I mean, I’m not so much a big manifest energy person, but I think the one thing that I’m praying for is to write an incredible album and to really just enjoy touring. I think you can let kind of the whole music and the whole whirlwind of it pass you by so I think just really enjoying it. And just really praying that creativity will come and that I’ll write something really interesting and groundbreaking.

#griff #interview #pop #singer songwriter

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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years ago

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Oh, The Lies You Tell - Bakugou Katsuki - pt.4

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: angst, trauma, abuse, betrayal, fluff, slice of life, smut, cursing, manipulation, possible spoilers, physical harm, 18+

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Ep. Warnings: cursing, small angst

Summary: after getting caught by dabi, Y/N’s been extra cautious ESPECIALLY with Bakugou. She’s still trying to figure out her feelings about..well, EVERYTHING and so to cope, she blocks out everything and isolates.

Pt.1 Pt.2 P.3 P.4 Pt.5 Pt.6 Pt.7 Pt.8 Pt.9

A/N: Kinda short, Sorry :P

Bakugou’s POV

After spending all that time with Y/N, I could definitely say I like her. Like...LIKE HER like her. She’s..amazing. She has to be one of the top fighters in our class, she’s beautiful and has an incredible body. Her voice is like honey and she has this smile..that’s just..wow. Besides her physical, her as a person is incredible. She’s a good listener, she’s so open minded, she’s respectfully honest, and she brings out the better me.

I’ll admit, I’m pretty strict on following rules. I need to make a good name for myself out in the hero world. But Y/N has a delinquent past. She teaches me to risk it with the stupid rules and just enjoy life as a teen. Not only that, but considering she’s a little rebel herself, she can get out of hand sometimes. So she has me to keep her from going over the cliff. We’re a perfect balance for each other.

.....We’re perfect for each other.

No one’s POV

The morning after your little rendezvou with Bakugou, you woke up in heartache. You were so confused on why. Was it because you were something you’re not to everyone? Was it because you were doing this for the league more than for yourself? But you weren’t dumb. You knew the answer. Or rather, answers. Firstly, it’s because you knew you weren’t enjoying yourself by going through with this plan. It didnt feel right. Second, Bakugou. As scared as you were to admit it..you liked him. You really liked him.

That fact terrified you. You didn’t grow up around love. You grew up around hatred, bloodshed, violence, and fear. For your entire life, everything was all about survival. Even when you had a “steady” home with the league. But Bakugou came into the picture and threw you off. With him, he gave you a sense of security and peace. A warm feeling inside your heart that became more addicting than any drug. Yes, you enjoyed it but at the same time, it confused you. You weren’t sure how to deal with these emotions. You weren’t even sure if you deserved to be blessed with these emotions. With Katsuki.

You were and are a villain. You are the high ranking villain, Titania, and you are on a mission to take down UA from the inside. You were a villain, and you knew your place. A killer, a criminal, a thief, a menace like you didn’t deserve these feelings of..love. You didn’t even know how to handle them. So you did what you thought was best no matter how bad it hurt you.

When you walked into the hallway that your dorm opens up to, you were gifted with the surprise of Katsuki being there, waiting for you.

“Hey Princess,” he began but looked down to your side. “Princess and Rumor.” He said as he chuckled and petted Rumor’s head. Rumor smiled up at the familiar blonde and barked in happiness. Those two got along so well. “So I was thinking we could walk to class together.”

“Sorry...but..no. Come Rumor.” You said and turned away as you cringed at yourself in regret. Rumor followed you, along with Bakugou.

“Heh..sure princess. Try again.” He said thinking you were just messing around. Except, you didn’t answer him. You just kept walking with a blank look on your face, as if he wasn’t even around. Your entire persona was just..off? No playful remarks, no sass or attitude, no teasing mannerisms. It wasn’t you. “Hey, Y/N.”

He tried to put his hand on your shoulder but you sped up and walked out the doors with Rumor leaving Bakugou in confusion and hurt.

‘Did I do something wrong?’ Bakugou released a quiet whine to your behavior and just shook his head and continued to walk to school.

When he arrived in the class, you had already been seated. Thankfully, your desk was next to his so he could try speaking to you then. He firstly walked to you and tried getting some sort of conversation out of you.

“So..what do you think is gonna happen today?” He asked. Even he thought it was a pathetic question but at least it was something.

“Not sure.” You blatantly replied.

“Oh...okay well, uh, Shitty hair and I were planning on getting a workout in later, do you wanna join us?” He asked again.

“I’ll be training with Rumor today and thats all.” You said.

“Nice....you uh, mind if we join you?”

“No.”

“Uh....okay. Cool...........Y/N, listen I-“

“Take your seat Bakugou. Class is starting.” Mr. Aizawa said. Bakugou reluctantly took his seat but not before looking towards you with desperate eyes for at least something more than what you were giving him. But nothing came.

Class went on and Bakugou tried to focus as best as he could, but with the girl he was falling for completely brushing him off, he was in a silent frenzy. Bakugou and you had a thing during class hours. When you guys were dying to talk to each other, you would pass little notes to each other’s desks and continue with that. So he did his usual notes with you and passed one your way. It’s said ‘are you doing okay, Princess?’ But when he tossed it onto your desk, you left the crumpled piece of paper there as you continued listening to Mr. Aizawa.

Since you didn’t reply, he sent another one your way. This time, making sure it hit you a little bit to get your attention but once again, nothing.

‘Wtf’ Bakugou thought. He assumed you were just having a bad morning so even though it hurt him, he left you alone to cool off. I mean, it’s not like he was the only one you weren’t speaking to. You were practically ignoring everybody’s existence.

Lunch rush came and Bakugou was a little relieved. Y/N always say next to him no matter what happened. Even on those quiet days where she didn’t speak a lot during that time, he was glad she was still there and would occasionally join in on the conversation just like he did. But you didn’t come this time. Bakugou waited and when he finally saw you walking towards the table, he smiled and spoke.

“Hey Princess! About time you-“ but before he could continue, you kept your head straight and kept walking, not even sparring the table a glance. He watched you walk on and sit at a lonely table. No one was there. It was just you and Rumor. Bakugou stared from afar and after waiting for a few minutes and giving you multiple concerned stares every now and then, he finally got up to walk to you. Before he could even leave his seat though, Kirishima held him back.

“Don’t man, give her some time. She needs a break.” Kirishima said.

“From what exactly? If you know something, you should tell me now! Cuz if there’s something messing with her, tell me so I can kill it.” Bakugou replied. He was a little hurt thinking that you told Kirishima your problems and not him but he was really more concerned with what’s bugging you. What the hell was bothering you so much? Whatever it was, he’ll make sure it stops.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with her, but it’s obvious she doesn’t wanna speak to anyone right now. Just let her stick by Rumor and be at peace for the day. Or at least until she’s feeling better.” Kirishima explained. And Bakugou knew he was right, so with a stubborn groan he sat back down and just continued to stare.

The day went on and Bakugou let you be. But it was definitely killing him on the inside. He struggled to hold himself back whenever he saw you in a room but he did restrain himself. Once in the common rooms, he noticed you didn’t even bother to stay for a minute. You went straight to your dorm even though Rumor stayed to play with Kaminari and Sero. You spent all day in there and only opened the door to Rumor. When you finally came out, it was to grab a plate of dinner for you and Rumor. You didn’t even stay to eat, you brought the food to you room and that was the last time Bakugou saw you that day. This whole thing was killing him, but what he didn’t know was that from the privacy of your room, your own tears fell much heavier than Bakugou’s.

When Y/N entered her dorm room and placed the plates of food on her table side, she sat on the side of the bed with her head hanging low, casting a shadow to fall over her face. She gripped her bed sheets and she held back sobs. Her teeth grinding against each other in frustration as her eyes squeezed shut to attemp to stop the flooding tears but to no avail. As her hiccups left her voice, Rumor came to place his head on her lap to calm her down. She placed one hand over her mouth to silence herself and calm down as she rubbed Rumor’s soft fur. She eventually gave in and sat on the floor, hugging and holding onto the giant wolf-dog.

“T-This isn’t our place Rumor...this isn’t where we belong. We’re v-villains....we don’t deserve the good they’re giv-ing us.” You sobbed out as you cried into his side.

“I d-don’t belong here!” You cried out. You sobbed into your mattress as Rumor waited for you on the side. He didn’t know what to do with his best friend being so distraught. Your continuous sobs went on for a few hours into the night. Rumor stayed right by your side through it all. The silence that filled your room was so loud and head ringing, it was almost torture. In a quiet voice, you whispered only to remind yourself a fact that Dabi had told you.

“I don’t deserve him.”

——————————————————————————

“ARGHHH!” Bakugou screamed as he snapped his pencil in anger. Y/N and Rumor just walked passed the group and went to Y/N’s dorm in silence. The Bakusquad looked at the ash blonde in concern. They knew how this boy felt. Y/N’s been avoiding him like the plague and Bakugou can’t get her off his mind.

When you completely ignored his presence, it put Bakugou into a state of sadness. Whenever he tried to talk to you, he was given brief answers followed with your dismissal. He tried doing favors for you, making time to hang out again, and asked to train with you which resulted in him getting rejected each time. It was driving him mad and he just wanted to be around you again.

“I still don’t get why the hell she’s acting like this! When we hung out, everything was perfect! What the fuck is going on with her?!” He shouted in anger. When Y/N is around, Bakugou gets this warm feeling inside that he’s learned to love. Now the girl is never around and he’s bursting in anger at every little thing. Can you blame him? He’s kind of hurt. The girl he’s in like with doesn’t even acknowledge him when she passes by anymore. He misses you. A lot.

“Well why don’t you ask her?” Kirishima questioned.

“Because I-.........actually, that’s a good idea.” Bakugou said as he dropped everything to run up to your dorm and talk. How could he have been so dumb? Listening to Shitty hair. All that hair dye is messing with his brain and local advice. He couldn’t believe he had really left you alone in pain for a whole day. Now, he was gonna get to the bottom of this one way or another. When he made it there, he began banging on your door without even giving it a second thought.

“Y/N! Open up, c’mon! I know you’re in there.” He said on the other side. In the comfort of your bed you poked your head out of the covers and reluctantly got out. You knew he wouldn’t stop till he got his answers. So you went to open the door and put on the best smile you could.

“Hi Katsuki,” you said with a huff. “Look, I’ve been having a really bad headache so if you don’t mind-“

“Nope,” he interrupted and just pushed open the door to get inside. How charming. He walked in and you just rolled your eyes and sighed. You shut the door and turned to him. “You can’t lie to me about some headache Y/N, I know it’s not the truth. You’ve been avoiding me and I wanna know why.”

“It’s nothing personal, I just..needed some time.” You said, looking everywhere but at him. A silence entered the room. Not the comforting silence it usually is with you two, more of the nervous kind. Bakugou thought about what he would say next..he didn’t even know if it was okay to say. But he did it anyway.

“Is it...me? Did I do something wrong?” You looked at him with a shocked face as he continued, “‘cuz if it was me, then... I’m sorry. I’m new to this whole..whatever we have going on, but I’m really trying here and I-...I don’t know, I thought that night we went out was pretty good, but I can do better if you jus-“

“Katsuki, hey no, stop that,” you said as you walked up to him. “This has nothing to do with you messing up or anything. That night was amazing, you are amazing, and everything that’s happened between us so far has been..amazing.” You confessed.

“So then...why? Why all the distance? Why do you avoid me?....what happened?” Bakugou asked as he got closer. If something was wrong, he genuinely wanted to help you out of it. You just laughed a little before you spoke, realizing how cliche you were gonna sound.

“Look, it’s not you, it’s me. I’ve just been going through something..life changing, and I don’t really know who I am yet. I just..needed a break from everything. Especially you.” You said as you looked him in his eyes.

“Especially me? Why?” He asked. The amount of nerves that hit you all at once was ridiculous. You could confess right here right now and rip off the bandaid. Or you could lie your way out and save yourself the embarrassment. You bit your lip and tilted your head towards the ceiling for a second in exhaustion before speaking.

“Because.....Ugh! I like you, all right? A lot. You..you’re really cute, and fun, and there’s just all these amazing things about you annddd..” as you spoke you looked at his face and he started to grow a small smile as he looked at you with that cocky look and a slightly raised brow, “stop doing that!” You said and smacked his shoulder.

“Ow, what?” He laughed out. “Stop doing what?”

“That! That stupid face that you do when you look at me with that smile and face when you just...and..you....you just-.....Umm..uh..” you trailed off from your sentence as Bakugou leaned down into your face, resting his forehead on yours.

“And..?” He asked.

“And...and no free compliments!” You said as you pushed his shoulder and turned to your side. He chuckled at the way you pouted and crossed your arms. “Look, we’ve established that I like you Katsuki,”

“Keep going, I like what I’m hearing,” he said with a grin and his hands in his pockets.

“And that’s the problem.”

“Okay, stop. I don’t like it anymore.” He said and looked to the side with a grouchy face. You laughed and walked up to him and pulled at his arms.

“No, seriously,” you said with a laugh, “I like you, but that’s the problem. Where I’m from...it’s..different. I never really got to explore emotions like this..so..I don’t really know how to handle them. It’s confusing. I just thought, if I isolated and took some time to myself, they would go away...but they haven’t. They’re still here, they’re still strong, and I still don’t know what to do.” You said with a heavy breath. The weight finally came off of your chest after your confession but something was still poking at you and you weren’t sure what. You didn’t let it bother you for too long though, you finally felt like you could breath again.

“So..what? You’re emotionally constipated? ‘Cuz if That’s the case, then I’m the same way, princess. We must come from the same place.” He joked.

“Oh no we don’t. If anything......it’s almost like we’re from two different worlds,” you said with a slightly sad demeanor that Bakugou detected. He picked you up, sat on your bed and got comfortable while placing you on his lap.

“So then explain. Talk. Tell me about this ‘different world’ you claim you’re from, princess.” He said with air quotes as he kept one arm snug around your waist.

“I can’t,” you sighed and looked down at your hands in your lap, “if I told you everything, I know for a fact you’d just drop me outta your life...I know it’s selfish but I don’t know if I could honestly handle that,” you quietly said. Bakugou tilted your head so you were facing him.

“Nothing you say could ever make me want to get rid of you..I promise.....something about you just..makes me need to have you around.” He said caressing your cheek. You both stared at each other, enjoying the warmth you both radiated. The atmosphere changed into something some would call love, and if this was what it was, you didn’t want it to stop. It became something so comforting and addicting the both of you didn’t want to lose it.

Once again, the world around you fell away, as you and Bakugou became the only two people in the world again. He leaned in closer, and you mimicked his actions, until the soft feeling of his lips pressed against yours. Fireworks went off in your head as you met in the middle in the softest way, and what started as a passionate kiss turned into a sweet makeout. Your lips danced across one another and you both could savor the taste you were experiencing. While the flavor of caramel and spice came onto you, the delicious taste of strawberries and scent of vanilla invaded Bakugou’s senses. He adored the way you tasted and craved it even more after every second. When you both finally separated, you stared at each other with starry eyes and heavy breaths as you leaned against each other in a loving way. Blush adorned both your faces as the comforting silence filled the air once again. Bakugou was the first to speak.

“Y/N...whatever it is you need..assistance, time, comfort, I’ll always provide. Just please don’t push me away ‘cuz I won’t go.” He said with his head against yours.

“Yeah..heh, I believe you,” you softly said. Bakugou pulled your head down to lean against his shoulder as you cuddled into him, enjoying the moment. Until you realized, you might just have to tell him everything. Bakugou seemed to sense your little nerve and settled you down. He kissed the crown of your head before speaking.

“Tell me everything when you’re ready, princess.” He said. You felt tears of joy fill your eyes, but you didn’t let them fall. You just reveled in the comfort and love Bakugou was giving you. Love. How amazing. Something many people had told you, you didn’t deserve. But Bakugou came in and changed all of that for you. He came into the darkness and provided the small amount of light you needed. You were so thankful for him. You smiled before speaking in a sweet voice of appreciation.

“Okay.”

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shunsuiken · 5 years ago

Note

hc’s for Kuroo and Bokuto with a fem!s/o that DOES NOT STOP TALKING!!EVER!!! like she seems quiet and calm at first, but then she surprises them; please 🥺🥺 xo

due to my illiteracy i read kuroo and kenma sdsjdksj i still wrote bokutos hcs tho so dw! thank u for this request<3

kuroo, kenma and bokuto having a talkative fem s/o.

—kuroo tetsurou.

so when you and kuroo first started dating

you guys were kinda nervous at first but thats natural for a new couple

after a few weeks though, you guys began opening up quicker and more comfortably with each other

communicating became much easier as well when you both learned each others love languages through lots of trial and error 💀

then came this time where

it was as if

your soul had switched with someone elses

because kuroo knew the type of person you were and what you were like

but that was not what he felt when he saw you excitedly chatting away with your friends regarding some movie that came out last week

(you guys are also laughing HYSTERICALLY with each other and omg kuroo has never seen that big of a smile on your face EVER)

kenma had to poke his sides to bring him back to earth cus dude was just that shocked

“KENMA WHAT WAS THAT FOR??-?-?-?1?1”

“you’ve been staring at y/n for a socially unacceptable amount of time, you look like a creep.”

“OH! HEY KUROO YOU’RE ON LUNCH BREAK”

oh my god. kuroo would think at first. who WERE you???

he realised that maybe all this time, the reserved and quiet you may have just been the first layer of your personality, maybe you just needed the time to adapt to the changes?

and so will kuroo lmao

“KUROO KUROO HAVE YOU SEEN THIS NEW MOVIE” “WE SHOULD WATCH IT” “ITS ACTUALLY REALLY NICE AND”

“y/N??? DO YOU NORMALLY SPEAK FHIS MUCH???” he was so used to seeing your calm and relaxed composure

and now that you looked like the epitome of chaos, he felt so cheated that he wasn’t able to get you to be like this in the first few weeks of the relationship

“YEAH!!! but MAYBE im on a SUGAR RUSH right now IM NOT ENTIRELT SURE BUT”

kuroo is just watching you speak, this dumb smile on his face as the truest form of you flourishes in front of him

he’ll start acting like a parent at some point because YOU ARE CRAZY MAAM

“y/n stop yappin’ and EAT” “WAIT WAIT LOOK AT THIS TEASER FOR THAT NE-”

he’d deadass shove a whole onigiri in your mouth just to tease you for a bit

he also likes that he can make jokes and make you laugh louder than before

hes just so happy to see this side of you 🥺

—kozume kenma.

kenma is going to be SO SHOCKED

ngl he’d probably look at u with his brows like >:0 “where did u take my girlfriend!!! where is my girlfriend!!!”

and you’d be in this happy mood so you are PEAK chatty right now so you’re laughing at kenma’s face cus 💀

were your two personalities really just that different 💀💀

kenma will have to get used to your sudden outbursts of excitement conversations every now and then

boy has NO idea what triggered you into switching personalities

but i guess kuroo helps him connect the dots and hes like oh and then hes like oh :D because its a good thing that you willingly act like this in front of him

esp without feeling embarassed or anything hes happy you’re comfortable

its also really cute when you suddenly feel like youre rambling too much

your arm would cling around kenma’s and he’d listen to you ramble about this new netflix show that was released a few weeks ago but it was totally cliche so you told him how the entire internet made fun of it

then when you turn your head to look at kenma, hes just looking forward and you’re like “sorry, rambling arent i?”

“its not a bother,” he’ll say, sliding his fingers to wrap around yours. “if you want we could watch it together for the fun of it”

and thats literally what yall did and oml is kenma glad to see the chaos unfold in front of him

(you were not wrong when you said it was cliche, kenma almost puked at how cliche it was lmfao)

he’ll defs poke fun at the way youre loud just around him and your closest friends but when youre with other people youre just crickets

sometimes when hes playing, you’ll watch his screen and suddenly start braiding his hair

and boy does he have some silky locks despite all the bleaching

then theres another situation where hes playing and you’ll be right beside him, commenting and yelling when they’re in a danger zone

“KENMA IF YOU STAY THERE YOURE-” “I KNOW I KNOW IM TRYING TO GET OUT” “QUICK!! YOUVE ONLY GOT 10 SECONDS LEFT”

“pft kenma you got your girl over or sth? we can hear her” an online friend is gonna say and kenma’s JUST BLUSHING AND STUTTERING, TRYING TO EXPLAIN

you can hear kuroo’s hyena laughter through kenma’s headphones 💀

and since you got to see kenma stumble all over his words and act like a nervous trainwreck, it was overall a very enjoyable experience for you

“sooo when are you gonna play again?”

HES GOING TO PINCH YOUR CHEEKS AS A PUNISHMENT

but you like it cus kenma does this cute nose scrunch whenever he pinches your cheeks

and ever since you’ve shown kenma this side of you, the teases between you and him have been endless

you both make sure never to go too far with the jokes tho! so alls good :)

—bokuto koutarou.

bo would prolly be so confused at first like yall know that one ep where hes up against karasuno for that summer training camp and hes just (°_°) YEAH

he’d be like that for the first five seconds before shit clicks

“Y/N!!! Y/N!!!!” “KOU!!! KOUTAROU!!!!” and cue the big couple hug

and every other third year is like 💆🏻‍♀️ here they go AGAIN

and akaashi is literally holding bokuto’s hotdog he literally threw in the air

“A- AKAASHI DO YOU SEE THIS” “yes, bokuto-san, please lower your voice”

bokuto is just 🤩 @ you and he can’t seem to take his eyes off your lips, he loves the way they move

sometimes when yall are in the same class, everyone purposely puts you two on each end of the class

just so that your vibes dont mix and end up causing an explosion

but distance makes the heart grow fonder 🥴

SO THERES LITERALLY NO DIFFERENCE

but even if you two become a lil too loud for everyones liking, they still enjoy the atmosphere you two bring

also loves to invite you and akaashi to walk home together because 🥺 the energy is just so nice

hes also glad that his girl and his best friend can speak comfortably

also rip akaashi’s ears whenever you two start laughing or yelling about some stupid puns you read out loud on the way home

now, during practises after school

the entire fukurodani vbc has to constantly remind you guys to tone down your noise levels

no, not those noise levels

but the way both of you can speak so passionately when talking about things you both have mutual interest in

there’ll be lots of jumping around and always expect the unconscious hand-holding, bo just really likes to hold hands with you

“Y/N YOU LIKE THIS MOVIE??1?2?1?-?1?” “YEAH IVE LOVED IT SINCE LIKE,,, FOREVER!!”

and obvi bokuto’s gonna bring up and ask you why and how you suddenly have so much more energy than before

and you’re just like “i’m only like that for a while 🥺” and you tell him you only start showing the way you actually act when you’re fully comfy w the person

his face softens, relieved that he can make you feel safe in his presence

hes happy that you’ve come to feel that way

so he becomes clingy for the rest of the afternoon you’re not complaining

#haikyuu!!#kuroo tetsurou #kozume kenma #bokuto koutaru #kuroo tetsurou x reader #kenma kozume x reader #kuroo x reader #kenma x reader #bokuto x reader #haikyuu fluff #hq fluff #haikyuu headcannons #hq headcanons #hq hcs #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #bokuto koutarou x reader

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argumentl · 4 years ago

Text

The Freedom of Expression - Ep 45, radio version, August 2016 - Dobashi in Brazil, 'Crush the NHK' election broadcast, Shark movies.

Kaoru starts the show by commenting on how suntanned Joe looks. Joe says he attended Fuji Rock and got tanned. He spent three days watching live performances and had a great time. The weather was relatively mild, cool at night, no rain, so Joe says it was quite a 'comfortable' Fuji Rock. Joe asks Kaoru if he's getting a suntan yet. Kaoru says he hasn't got a tan at all. He has been spending all his time indoors song writing.

Kaoru then reminds listeners that its only three more days until the live special will be broadcast, and reads out the title of it again. Joe says its quite a rough sounding title. People will be intrigued by it. Kaoru then says he has recieved a message from Dobashi in Brazil, and proceeds to read it out..The message reads as follows: 'Hi to everyone at TFoE. Are you all well? Are you into 'Hiranabe Go'? (*Kaoru comments, 'We kinda are'*) At the time of this broadcast I am in the Southern hemisphere, in Rio de Janeio, Brazil. There may be people wondering why Tokyo Sports has come here. I've been requested to do Tokyo Sports style reporting here, but nothing dangerous enough to get us into trouble. Some of my articles are already published, so please, fans of Dir en grey, fans of Joe, fans of Kami, and fans of Hiranabe with thier butts out (*Did I get this right?? '平鍋の下半身出たファンの皆さん'...??😳*), please do go and pick up a copy of Tokyo Sports. There will also apparently be a live broadcast of this show on August 9th and I will join it from the other side of the world for just a little while. Security is so bad here, and I may be robbed during the broadcast, but I won't miss it! Everyone please listen'. Kaoru and Joe both say they are looking forward to it. Kaoru reckons it'll be about lunch time in Brazil when Dobashi joins them for the show. Just the kind of time he's likely to be busy with work.

Tasai joins them next, for the Tokyo Sports corner. Tasai goes back to the question of why Tokyo Sports is at the Olympics. He says that overseas, people see the word 'Tokyo' in Tokyo Sports, and often mistakenly assume that it must be the major sports newspaper in Japan (*It isn't actually considered a serious newpaper at all in Japan*). Once, when a Tokyo Sports journalist went overseas to report, a special reserved seat had been set up just for them. Kaoru says he can understand how such a misunderstanding could take place. If they, as Japanese people, heard of a newspaper with 'New York' in the title, they would assume it was pretty major. Tasai calls this, 'Tokyo Sports magic'. They laugh about how the people in Brazil might see Dobashi and think 'Wow, a Tokyo Sports reporter!', they probably assume he's rich.

Tasai's first news is about one of the contenders for the Tokyo Governor position, Tachibana Takashi, who represents the N Koku party (or The Party To Protect The People From The NHK). His election broadcast/pitch was pretty incredible, says Tasai. Joe watched it, so knows all about it, but Kaoru did not. Tachibana was originally an employee of NHK. He quit after leaking info about NHK's financial trouble to a gossip mag. When running for Tokyo Governor, he put out a 6 min televised election pitch, which was actually broadcast on NHK, in which he repeatedly called for the NHK to be destroyed. This has gained both supportive and critcal reactions from the public. NHK employees get a very high annual salary, which is paid for by the NHK fee imposed on the public. Even people with low incomes are hounded for this fee, which Tachibana thinks is questionable. In his pitch, Tachibana also raised the many crimes or wrongdoings which individuals related to NHK have been involved in, including the case of two NHK TV announcers who were having an affair, and were caught having sex in a car. Tachibana claims the NHK is trying to cover up this info. Kaoru wonders if Tachibana is holding some kind of grudge against the NHK.

Joe then mentions the documentary movie 'Candidates/立候補', which deals with the topic of bubble candidates in elections. This movie features Mac Akasaka who is also another bubble candidate in this Tokyo Governor election. Joe explains that a bubble candidate is a candidate who is not expected to recieve many votes (like Tachibana). He adds that in order to run in the election, any wannabe candidates have to first pay a fee of ¥3million. This is to try to avoid joke candidates from running, and to make sure the candidates who do run are doing so seriously. The movie in question deals with the idea of paying the fee whilst knowing you won't win, and the reasons for doing so. Joe says it may obviously just be for a bit of self promotion, but this is also actually a good way to put a message out to the public that would never normally get there through the mass media. At the same time, there is always the risk that you will come across as a joke, despite paying ¥3million. Its a risk you have to take if you run as a bubble candidate. Tasai adds that any candidate that recieves less than ten percent of the vote has to forfeit the money they paid. Joe says that most bubble candidates never clear this post, and they have the added burden of campaign costs. They may get a chance to speak out about what they want, but it costs. Tasai comments that criticizing the NHK publicly is actually a massive tabboo, so ¥3million is perhaps not so expensive if it means being able to say such things publicly. With the tv election pitch which all candidates get, you have 6 mins on national tv to speak the truth exactly as you see it. Tasai's favourite thing about Tachibana's pitch is that at the end of his speech, he proposed a kind of quiz asking viewers to guess how many times he had said, 'Crush the NHK!' during the last 6 mins.

Joe also mentions that the 6 min televised election pitch can also unfortunately be used as a means to deliver hate speech, which was seen in the pitch of candidate Sakurai Makoto, founder of the ultra-nationalist/far-right group Zaitokukai. Allowing candidates to speak thier mind directly comes with this risk. Joe then brings up the legendary election pitch by rock star Uchida Yūya, still available to watch on youtube today. (*Do check this out if you havn't already!*)

Tasai's next news is about the recent hit shark move, 'The Shallows' (Japanese title: Lost Vacation.), starring Blake Lively. The movie had quite a low budget, but has taken in huge amounts at the box office. Tasai asks Joe and Kaoru if they like shark movies. Joe says he knows someone at the Rolling Stone office who is a shark movie mega-fan. Shark movies have evolved a lot since 'Jaws', there are even movies about flying sharks etc out there now. Its proper b-movie territory. These days there is also a lot of shark merchandise, like shark backpacks etc.

Tasai goes on to say that shark movies are particularly popular with young women these days. The younger generations, particularly women, are not that interested in mainstream Japanese movies, but much more into horror etc. Kaoru didn't know that young women actually went out to watch movies much these days. Tasai says they apparently tend go as groups of three or so. Each of the three will then tweet to thier friends, and so popularity spreads. Kaoru comes to the realisation that women also actually like scary stuff. Tasai says (*I think*) that a scary movie is the place to go to find young women this summer, and Kaoru likens this to playing 'Hiranabe Go'.

To finish, Kaoru comes back to talk about the live special which will happen in 3 days. Joe admits a lot of his friends have asked him about it. After the last live boadcast, they all recieved a bit of a bashing. Kaoru doesn't know how it will turn out. Joe says they will look back over the last six months during it, and Kaoru adds that he will play some more of the new jingle entries for the last time. Finally, he plugs the Dum Spiro Spero tour and ends the episode.

Songs - Dir en grey/Lotus, ???/??? (*couldn't make this out*), Dir en grey/Utafumi

Back to radio top page

#If anyone knows what the song at 12:40 is pls let me know #dir en grey #the freedom of expression #radio

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anothersievefistedfind · 4 years ago

Photo

Fugazi, 40 Watt, Athens, GA USA 12/18/1999 (FLS #0959)

This recording documents the last out of eight times Fugazi performed in Athens, Georgia, which played out at the 40 Watt Club as it did every single time since their first show in Athens on June 3, 1988.

As per Ian, “until recently, I think there were two cities in the country that we had played like numerous shows but always at the same place, one was in Austin, Texas at the Liberty Lunch, and the other one is right here at the 40 Watt, and we’ve gotten word that the Liberty Lunch has been shut down or it’s all over […] but the 40 Watt is still here so, here’s one, I guess we just wanna say thanks to the 40 Watt for having us some many times over the years.”

Clocking in at 1 hour and 55 minutes, this recording surely preserves one of the longest, perhaps even the longest performance in the live history of the band.

During the introductory remarks, Ian addresses someone in the crowd, asking if he is “the guy that played the 3 hours of Fugazi today”, adding: “Well, thanks. I am surprised you’re here actually, I’d think you’d be fucking sick of us by now…” while towards the end of the show, Ian reiterates that “it just occurred to me, if you played Fugazi songs for 3 hours today, you’re working on your fifth fucking hour of us” and grants him a request by way of “reward” which results in Great Cop. It appears that the “DJ” in question is John Farrar, current co-host of the Live On 4 Legs podcast which pays tribute to the Pearl Jam live repertoire.

While the recording sounds excellent overall, as noted (see submission below), I find that a good part of the set is a bit of a hodgepodge and it is not until Break that it really starts grabbing my attention. But those last nine songs are pretty much perfect and elevate the overall performance.

It certainly offers really good live versions of a number of songs, yet absolute highlights in my book include KYEO, a song “particularly appropriate given the fact that people in Seattle try to make us think about a somewhat dubious World Trade Organization, so-called civilized American police force shot them with rubber bullets, and a so-called truthful American media portrayed it as a bunch of fucking thugs breaking windows but the thugs are on the other side of the badge, so just when you though it was safe… the troops are quiet tonight, but it’s not alright cause they are planning something…”, as well as an early live rendering of Ex-Spectator in instrumental form and a standout performance of Sweet and Low which features various nice additional yet subtle touches and embellishments on guitars and drums (accentuated by sound-man Nick Pellicciotto) and unusually ends with some drawn-out guitar feedback.

While the set list draws from all available work at the time (or even the Argument album and Furniture EP unreleased at the time), note that it includes just one song off of Margin Walker EP and 7 Songs debut EP each, as well as just two songs off of Repeater.

(Words below submitted by Antti Väärälä)

“I gotta say, this is definitely one of the best sounding FLS offerings I've had the pleasure to listen to so far. There's some mix settling going on during Number 5, but after that it's a breeze. So I would easily rate this as ‘excellent’. The mix breathes, the stereo field is fully utilized and every instrument and vocal is clear. The drum sound is as good as it gets. The added effects are not over-used, but instead add some very nice color and atmosphere.

Be prepared that there is some minimal digital crackling here and there. It didn't really bother me though, as it's only a few times.

The band start off with some amusingly casual chatting. A pretty classic show structure follows at first in the form of flowing rockers with Place Position being a personal highlight. As a sidenote, I'm pretty sure you can hear Brendan yelling in delight behind the kit on a lot of songs which is a lot of fun.

Stacks is a perfect addition to the set and after that it's all a highlight for me, as the band practically flies through awesome performances one after another. A psychedelic Floating Boy merging seamlessly into a superbly dynamic Argument is just pure Fugazi bliss for me. Another really cool seamless merge is from Oh to Closed Captioned. More of these merges follow but I don't want to spoil them all.

The band play a really long set, representing basically their whole repertoire. A lot of tight rockers are balanced with some sweet moments. The final encore shows this especially well with punk fury, rocking wit and tenderness all thrown into play. Ex-Spectator is starting to be very confident albeit still instrumental here. Sweet And Low is definitely one of the coolest versions I've ever heard.

I gotta give a special mention to how amazingly Fugazi utilize dynamics in their performance at this point. A recording of this caliber really shows that off.

A highly recommended mammoth of a show!”

The set list:

1. Intro 2. Number 5 3. Cassavetes 4. And The Same 5. Place Position 6. Styrofoam 7. Public Witness Program 8. Interlude 1 9. Stacks 10. Recap Modotti 11. FD 12. Furniture 13. Floating Boy 14. Argument 15. Give Me The Cure 16. Song #1 17. Arpeggiator 18. Oh 19. Closed Captioned 20. Runaway Return 21. Interlude 2 22. Five Corporations 23. Interlude 3 24. Turnover 25. Bed For The Scraping 26. Caustic Acrostic 27. Break 28. Forensic Scene 29. Pink Frosty 30. Target 31. Interlude 4 32. KYEO 33. Encore 34. Ex-Spectator Instrumental 35. Interlude 6 36. Great Cop 37. Do You Like Me 38. Sweet and Low

#FLS1999 #fugazi #fugazi live series #dischord #40 watt #athens #georgia #ga #liberty lunch #austin #antti väärälä #ian wright #the alphabetical fugazi #john farrar #live on 4 legs

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sleepyboisinc · 5 years ago

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soo,,, the secret au huh?

its a band au. its a fucking band au. im posting this super impulsively, and it has no editing i think so if there are any mistakes,,,, fuck it idc

also this ends in a sort of cliffhanger i was gonan write more but i got tired of writing and never got the motivation to again im sorry lul

this au isnt just by me, theres other ppl involved in it too!! mainly bad timezone gang in technohive but others also helped :)

anywaysyysyshdhsh yea read if u want to ig

wilbur soot was discovered by a record label when he was 15 after he wrote the squid song. they didn't care that the lyrics were objectively bad, it was wilbur’s voice that grabbed their attention. they interviewed him and decided that they were gonna give him a chance. wilbur, who had always dreamed of being a singer, jumped at the opportunity. the interview went very well. they even asked him to sing a few songs and he nailed it. however, he wasn’t perfect. he still needed some vocal training. they spent an entire day discussing and signing paperwork. the label ended up arranging for wilbur to attend music classes to enhance his voice and get better at the guitar.

time-skip about 3 years. wilbur is 18 and is phenomenal at singing and the guitar. he starts going to uni and meets his roommate, an american student named technoblade who plays the violin. wilbur and techno quickly become friends, bonding over music and other mutual interests like video games. techno plays mini gigs on the street and at bars close to campus to make some money for himself. particularly at a little bar called “the harpy’s nest”

one day, wilbur gets bored sitting at home alone, so he goes to watch techno’s gig. he arrives halfway through the set and watches for about 5 minutes. after the gig is over, he watches as techno interacts with the bartender, a young man only slightly older looking than the two of them. techno notices wilbur and calls him over, introducing him to the bartender, philza. the two immediately hit it off and by the end of the night, they’ve exchanged numbers and a promise to meet up phil’s next shift.

over the next few months, the trio became best friends. wilbur learns that phil plays the drums and has several eps. one ep in particular, “hardcore2” blew up a bit in their general area and phil gained a bit of traction as a musician. the three boys spend most of their time hanging out at wilbur and techno’s dorm, or at phil’s bar. they stay up till ungodly hours playing video games and talking. their other friends dub them the sleepy boys, because of how tired they all are the next day.

however, as the months fly by, the date wilbur is supposed to finish training and write his first songs draws closer. he worries he’s bitten more than he can chew and he wonders if he’s even ready for fame. a month later he is assigned a manager, pete. pete says that his training contract has expired, meaning that he's ready to start writing his album. wilbur says that he needs to think a bit before he starts. pete was about to tell him he can’t have extra time to think because he signed a contract, but seeing the look of stress on wilbur’s face, he allows him 2 days before he starts. wilbur goes on a walk to think. he curses himself for second-guessing himself now. he realizes he doesn’t wanna do this alone. then he thinks of techno and phil.

what if they formed a band? that way he wouldn’t have to do this alone. he’s sure that they'd love to make a band together as well. he goes to them and… they agree. he goes to pete and asks him if they can be a three-piece band. pete says he needs to ask his higher-ups first. wilbur doesn’t hear from pete for 4 days and starts to worry. what if they won’t allow it? it wasn't part of the agreement so they have every right to turn him down. at the end of the fourth day, pete calls him and says that the higher-ups have agreed. they had to choose a group name by the end of 2 days. the trio was over the moon.

this was the start of sleepy bois inc.

their record label wasn’t massive, so the boys took to playing on the streets and in bars to gain some traction. they slowly started gaining recognition and grew faster when they made a youtube channel. they released several eps and a few albums, and gained a following over the next few years.

their first big break came 3 years after the band was formed. they had a decent following, about 50k subs on youtube and slightly less on other platforms. one day, jschlatt from lunch club, a massive boy band, got their music recommended to him on youtube. he’s intrigued and listened to it, and was surprised at how much he liked it. he liked it so much, that he decided to shout them out on twitter.

sleepybois inc’s popularity skyrocketed, and the members of both bands grew close. when lunch club announced their next tour, they revealed that sleepybois inc would open for them. the fans freak out, and many iconic moments and inside jokes form from this tour.

tommy innit was 19 years old and was preparing to become a musician. he was almost done with the 4 years of vocal and keyboard training provided by a record label and had to make a decision: be a solo artist, or join a band. if he chose the band, he has another 2 options: be assigned into a band that already exists under this label or make a new one with people that he knows.

tommy is also a massive fan of lunch club, and sees that jschlatt shouted out a band called sleepybois inc. he likes them a lot and becomes a fan of their stuff too. what tommy didn’t know is that they were at the same label he was training at and were open for a 4th member.

back on the music, tommy ended up going with band. he debated between making a band or being assigned one. after a while, he ended up going with being assigned. he was nervous about this because he'd have to integrate himself into their dynamic and feared that fans won’t like him, but he figured it’d be easier than making his friends all learn instruments.

being assigned a band is a process, so tommy had a couple of months free. during this time, lunch club was on tour with sleepybois inc and tommy got vip tickets to a show. so he went to the meet and greet and gave his number to sleepybois inc saying ”hmu if u need a keyboardist lul” as a joke (this is a very important detail i will include it f u)

so come around the day of tommy getting assigned. he has to do auditions for the bands that the record label selected for him to join. management has narrowed it down to the youngest 2 bands at their label who are open for a member: one of which is sleepybois inc.

it had been a month since tommy interviewed for sleepybois inc. he did pretty well at it, and had been talking to the boys a lot since then. he still hadn’t had news on whether he joined though.

it was 3 am. tommy had been working on school work for hours and had only just managed to finish up for the night. he settled into bed and was about to fall asleep when his phone rang. not bothering to look at who was calling, tommy picked it up

“who the fuck is calling me at 3 in the morning i swear to god-” tommy whispered angrily.

“tommy?” wilbur’s voice rang out “wait shit- this is probably a really bad time im sorry. but we have something important to tell you.”

tommy’s eyes widened.

“we’ve decided that you can join the band”

the band and their label spent a few weeks discussing how they would go about this. they boys decided they would need a name change too, and ended up settling on the name ‘purple pandas’. however, a new member and a name change would practically transform the band completely, so they had to go about announcing this the right way.

they ended up settling on posting a youtube video titled ‘making some changes’. seeing the announcement for this sent fans into a frenzy, frantically tweeting about what it could be. many rumours spread fast and it even got into a few news articles. conspiracies started floating around about what changes could possibly be taking place.

i cant write this shit no more bye

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d-criss-news · 5 years ago

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Darren Criss acts as playwright when he writes songs. He’s far more confident, and certainly more vulnerable, when he allows himself to play the part. In such a way, songwriting opens up a whole new world that pulses with untapped potential. So much of what he has accomplished in 15 years resides in his willingness to expose himself to what his imagination and intuition have in store. He steps into a playwright’s shoes with considerable ease (just look at his resume), and always one to put on plenty of bravado, especially during our Zoom face-to-face, it’s the natural order of things.

“As I get older and write more and more songs, I really recognize that I’ve always preferred to write for another context other than my own,” Criss tells American Songwriter. He speaks with a cool intensity, gesturing emphatically to accentuate a sentence, and when you let him go, he’s like the Energizer Bunny 一 “I can tell by just how quiet you already are that you’re fucked,” he jokes at the start of our video chat. But he remains just as engaged and focused when listening.

He soaks in the world, taking astute notes about behavior and emotional traits he can later use in song. His storytelling, though, arrives already in character, fully formed portraits he can then relay to the world. It’s not that he can’t be vulnerable, like such greats as Randy Newman, Tom Waits, and Rufus Wainwright, who have all embroidered their work with deeply personal observations, it just doesn’t feel as comfortable. “I’ve always really admired the great songwriters of the world who are extremely introspective and can put their heart and soul on the chopping block,” he muses. “That’s a vulnerability that I think is so majestic. I’ve never had access to it. I’m not mad about it. It’s just good to know what your deal is.”

Criss’ strengths lie in his ability to braid his own experiences, as charmed as they might be, into wild, goofy fantasies. In the case of his new series “Royalties,” now streaming on Quibi, he walks a fine line between pointed commentary on the music industry, from menial songwriting sessions to constantly chasing down the next smash, and oddball comedy that is unequivocally fun. Plotted with long-standing friends and collaborators Matt and Nick Lang, co-founders of Team StarKid, created during their University of Michigan days (circa 2009), the show’s conceptual nucleus dates back more than a decade.

If “Royalties” (starring Criss and Kether Donohue) feels familiar, that’s because it is. The 10-episode show ─ boasting a smorgasbord of delightful guest stars, including Mark Hammill, Georgia King, Julianna Hough, Sabrina Carpenter, and Lil Rel Howery ─ captures the very essence of a little known web series called “Little White Lie.” Mid-summer 2009, Team StarKid uploaded the shoddy, low budget production onto YouTube, and its scrappy tale of amateur musicians seeking fame and fortune quickly found its audience, coming on the heels of “A Very Potter Musical,” co-written with and starring Criss. Little did the trio know, those initial endeavors laid the groundwork for a lifetime of creative genius.

“It’s a full circle moment,” says Criss, 33, zooming from his Los Angeles home, which he shares with his wife Mia. He’s fresh-faced and zestful in talking about the new project. 11 years separate the two series, but their connective thematic tissues remain striking. “Royalties” is far more polished, the obvious natural progression in so much time, and where “Little White Lie” soaked in soapy melodrama, the former analyzes the ins and outs of the music world through more thoughtful writing, better defined (and performed) characters, and hookier original tunes.

“Royalties” follows Sara (Donohue) and Pierce (Criss), two struggling songwriters in Los Angeles, through various career exploits and pursuits. The pilot, titled “Just That Good,” features an outlandish performance from Rufus Wainwright as a major player in dance-pop music, kickstarting the absurdity of Criss’ perfectly-heightened reality. As our two main characters stumble their way between songwriting sessions, finally uncovering hit single potential while eating a hot dog, Criss offers a glimpse into the oft-unappreciated art of songwriting.

In his own songwriting career ─ from 2010’s self-released Human EP and a deal with Columbia Records (with whom a project never materialized) to 2017’s Homework EP and Computer Games’ debut, Lost Boys Life, (a collaboration with his brother Chuck) ─ he’s learned a thing or two about the process. Something about sitting in a room with someone you’ve never met before always rang a little funny to him.

“You meet a stranger, and you have to be creative, vulnerable, and open. It’s speed-dating, essentially. It’s a different episode every time you pull it off or not. All the big songwriters will tell you all these crazy war stories. Everyone has a wacky story from songwriting,” he says. “I slowly realized I may ─ I can’t flatter myself, there are tons of creative people who are songwriters ─ have prerequisites to just put the two together [TV and music]. I’ve worked enough in television as an actor and creator. I can connect the dots. I had dual citizenship where I felt like it was really time for me to go forth with this show.”

But a packed professional life pushed the idea to the backburner.

Between six seasons of “Glee” (playing Blaine Anderson, a Warbler and lover to Chris Colfer’s Kurt Hummel), starring in “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” on Broadway, and creating Elsie Fest, a one-day outdoor festival celebrating songs of the stage and screen, he never had the time. “I was lucky enough to be busy,” he says. “As Team StarKid’s star was continuing to rise with me being separate from it, I was trying to think of a way to get involved again with songwriting.”

At one point, “Glee” had officially wrapped and his Broadway run was finished. It appeared “Royalties” may finally get its day in the sun. “I went to Chicago for a work pilgrimage with the Langs. We had a few days, and we put all our ideas on the map: every musical, feature film, show, graphic novel, and animated series we’ve ever thought of,” he says. “A lot of them were from the Langs; they were just things I was interested in as a producer or actor. We looked at all of them and made a top three.”

“Royalties” obviously made the cut.

Fast forward several years, Gail Berman’s SideCar, a production company under FOX Entertainment, was looking to produce a music show. Those early conversations, beginning at an otherwise random LA party, showed great promise in airlifting the concept from novel idea to discernible reality. Things quickly stalled, however, as they often do in Hollywood, but Criss had at least spoken his dreams into the universe.

“I finally had an outlet to put it into gear. It wasn’t until two to three years after that that things really locked in. We eventually made shorts and made a pilot presentation. We showed it to people, and it wasn’t until Quibi started making their presence known that making something seemed really appealing,” he says. “As a creator, they’re very creator-centric. They’re not a studio. They’re a platform. They are licensing IP much like when a label licenses an indie band’s album after the fact.”

Quibi has drawn severe ire over the last few months, perhaps because there is a “Wild Westness” to it, Criss says. “I think that makes some people nervous. Being my first foray into something of this kind, Quibi felt like a natural partner for us. If this had been a network or cable show, we would’ve molded it to be whatever it was.”

Format-wise, “Royalties” works best as bite-sized vignettes, charming hijinks through the boardroom and beyond, and serves as a direct response to a sea of music shows, from “Nashville” and “Empire” to “Smash.” “Those shows were bigger, more melodramatic looks at the inside base of our world. I’ve always been a goofball, and I just wanted to take the piss out of it,” he says. “This show isn’t about songwriting. It’s about songwriters… but a very wacky look at them.”

“30 Rock,” a scripted comedy loosely based around “Saturday Night Live,” in which the focus predominantly resides around the characters, rather than the business itself, was also on his mind. “It’s about the interconnectivity of the people and characters. As much of the insider knowledge that I wanted to put into our show, at the end of the day, you just want to make a fun, funny show that’s relatable to people who know nothing about songwriting and who shouldn’t have to know anything.”

Throughout 10 episodes, Criss culls the “musicality, fun, and humor” of Fountains of Wayne’s Adam Schlesinger and Max Martin, two of his biggest songwriting heroes, and covers as many genres as possible, from K-Pop to rap-caviar and classic country. While zip-lining between formats, the songs fully rely on a sturdy storytelling foundation ─ only then can Criss drape the music around the characters and their respective trajectories. “I wanted to do something where I could use all the muscles I like to flex at once, instead of compartmentalizing them,” he says. “I really love writing songs for a narrative, not necessarily for myself. I thrive a little more when I have parameters, characters, and a story to tell.”

Bonnie McKee, one of today’s greatest pop architects, takes centerstage, too, with an episode called “Kick Your Shoes Off,” in which she plays a bizarro version of herself. “She has her own story, and I’ve always been fascinated by it,” says Criss, who took her out to lunch one day to tell her about it. Initially, the singer-songwriter, known for penning hits for Katy Perry, Taio Cruz, and Britney Spears, would anchor the entire show, but it soon became apparent she would simply star in her own gloriously zany episode.

In one of the show’s standout scenes, Pierce and Sara sit in on a label meeting with McKee’s character and are tasked with writing a future hit. But they quickly learn how many cooks are in the kitchen at any given moment. Everyone from senior level executives to publicists and contracted consultants have an opinion about the artist’s music. One individual urges her to experiment, while another begs not to alienate her loyal fanbase, and then a third advises her to chronicle the entire history of music itself ─ all within three minutes or so. It’s absurd, and that’s the point. “Everyone’s been in that meeting, whether you’re in marketing or any creative discussion that has to be made on a corporate level by committee. It’s the inevitable, comedic contradictions and dissociations from not only rationality but feasibility.”

Criss also draws upon his own major label days, having signed with Sony/Columbia right off the set of “Glee,” as well as second-hand accounts from close friends. “There are so many artists, particularly young artists, who famously get chewed up and spat out by the label system,” he says. “There’s a lot of sour tastes in a lot of people’s mouths from being ‘mistreated’ by a label. I have a lot of friends who’ve had very unfortunate experiences.”

“I was really lucky. I didn’t have that. I have nothing but wonderful things to say,” he quickly adds.“It wasn’t a full-on drop or anything. I was acting, and I was spreading myself really thin. It’s a record label’s job to make product, and I was doing it piecemeal here and there. I would shoot a season [of ‘Glee’] and then do a play. I was doing too many things. I didn’t have it in me at the time to do music. I had written a few songs I thought were… fine.”

Both Criss and the label came to the same conclusion: perhaps this professional relationship just wasn’t a good fit. They parted ways, and he harbors no ill-will. In fact, he remains close friends with many folks from that time. So, it seems, a show like “Royalties” satisfies his deep hunger to make music and write songs ─ and do it totally on his own terms.

“I still say I want to put out music, and fans have been very vocal about that. I feel very fortunate they’re still interested at all,” he says. “That passion for making music really does come out in stuff like [this show].”

“Royalties” is Darren Criss at his most playful, daring, and offbeat. It’s the culmination of everything he has tirelessly worked toward over the last decade and a half. Under pressure with a limited filming schedule, he hits on all cylinders with a soundtrack, released on Republic Records, that sticks in the brain like all good pop music should do. And it would not have been the same had he, alongside Matt and Nick Lang, not formed Team StarKid 11 years ago.

Truth be told, it all began with a “Little White Lie.”

#darren criss #american songwriter #royalties press #press #royalties #june 2020

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