#i always feel sort of silly for admitting the sad bits in this show hit me really hard
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A CHANGE OF HEART. one of my favorites. i love this episode SO MUCH!!!! for one: the songs are all great. the queens music video....taffy tango (the song that invented gay people fr)... i love the dancing in the tweedle's song where theyre climbing on the construction thingy....and then the last ones just catchy. but also!!!!!!! the episode is just sweet!!!!!!!! alice giving the queen a valentine just cus she likes her :((( dont even get me started on the queen not believing her at first :(((((( like its just so....RAAAH..... im crying man.....dont do this to me...,.,.,.,., if you like someone, say it with plyyyywoooood!
#“im not falling for THAT old line...” “im looking for where she wrote 'just kidding'!” WHO HURT YOU#i always feel sort of silly for admitting the sad bits in this show hit me really hard#there a few times that are like. damn!!!! like when hatter moves away or a bunch of rabbit episodes like its just aghhh#but the queen's ones esp are so sad to me#we're coming up on the christmas episode which always breaks my heart i WILL be going insane over it when we get to that one#alice in wonderland#adventures in wonderland#wonderland watchthrough#my art
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It’s not until after Wembley – when it all comes crashing down but he somehow finds himself still standing, strong arms wrapped around him to hold him up – that he tells his mum the truth. About all of it: Dad reappearing in the past few years, why he left City for Lust Conquers All, what he’d been like at Richmond back when he first came there and why he’s back at Richmond now, and how it’s going and how he’s struggling but how he’s properly a part of the team again, only different this time, and better.
It comes out a rush at times, jumbled, and at times it’s faltering and halted. His mum listens in silence and her hand never leaves his head, never stops stroking his hair.
“Is this why you stopped coming round?” she asks when he finally falls silent, and what the fuck can he tell her but the truth?
“Yeah. I didn’t… I just didn’t know what to tell you.”
He can feel her eyes on him, but he resolutely stares down at his hands idling along the hem of her shirt. Lying to her, if mostly by omission, had made him feel all sorts of sick and twisted up inside, so he’d just stayed away. Pleaded work and too far away and busy living the life, when he’d bothered to explain himself at all.
Mad shitty, that. He can admit that now, so he adds: “I’m sorry, mummy.”
She doesn’t tell him that he doesn’t need to be or that it doesn’t matter, because his mum has never lied to him, but her fingers finding his wrist for a gentle squeeze is absolution.
“I’m sorry, too,” she offers, and now his eyes snap to her face, because what. “That you had to deal with that hairy ball sack of a father again. Should have realized he’d start showing his ugly mug again once you became a star.”
He makes a face at that. “Yeah, no. Didn’t want you to know, so.”
His mum makes a face right back at him. “That’s just being silly, love. No more lies, yeah,” she adds with a light tap to his nose, as stern as she ever gets. “You don’t need to protect me, Jamie, and you don’t ever have to lie to me.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know. I know. It was just… fucking hard. Didn’t want you to have to deal with that shit or, or not be… proud of me or whatever.”
He can feel her smile, a little sad maybe, as she presses a kiss to the top of his head.
“I’ll always be proud of you, my sexy baby. And no matter where you go or what you do, I’ll always love you.”
Jamie nods against her chest, feeling a treacherous sting in his eyes. He knows that; has always known that. The first thing he ever knew about himself was that he was loved. He’d let himself forget, for a bit.
For a while, neither of them speak. He can hear the sound of a ball irregularly hitting a wall somewhere nearby and it’s the sound of his childhood, and from the kitchen drift the noises of Simon’s latest experiement, and he’s curled up against his mum on the couch and this is home.
“But it’s better now, at Richmond?” his mum asks eventually. “You’re doing all right?”
He lets out a long breath, just slightly shaky, and cuddles closer to her, pressing his face into her neck and letting himself relax completely into the comfort of her embrace and her familiar scent, the utter safety of it. Thinks about Sam returning his smiles now and about going out with Colin and Isaac again, leaning off of Dani’s shoulder. How Roy’s eyes no longer automatically harden whenever he enters a room.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m doing fine. Better.”
For the first time in a long time, it’s the truth.
#jamie is a mama’s boy and i’m not over it#i do have a lot of thoughts and questions about what georgie knew when#what jamie would tell her#about his dad’s abuse#and about being a prick when he first came to richmond#he’d not want to admit to either i think#not in spite of but BECAUSE of how close him and his mum are#he’d want to protect her AND be terrified of disappointing her#jamie tartt#georgie tartt#ted lasso#ficlet#my stuff
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levi ackerman relationship hcs
some modern headcanons, nsfw below the cut <3 it’s just levi brainrot at this point
definitely the type to follow (stalk) your spotify and check in to see what you’re listening to. if he has the time, he might even listen along and wonder what you’re doing. if it’s a particularly sad song or series of songs, he’ll know to send you a text to let you know he’s thinking of you
on that note, he also stalks your pinterest boards just to see what you’re into these days and (idk abt yall but i save pins of mens fashion) if he sees a cute outfit in your saves that fits his style, he might even try it out. reason being (though he’ll never admit to it) he loooves that kind of attention from you - when he looks particularly good and you can’t stop staring, it might just pull a smirk out of him
once you’re living together, he lowkey acts like a dad. might scold you for not closing doors, not turning off lights, all the like. he means well, honestly
however, doesn’t mind tidying up for you. folds your laundry, clears your plate, takes your jacket off your shoulders when you get home, just because it’s his way of showing he cares. definitely an acts of service kind of guy
really good at cooking! he likes spending days in the kitchen with you while he whips something up or tries something new and you just sit at the counter and talk to him. it’s a good way to catch up as your adult lives can sometimes get busy
if you fall asleep with earbuds still in, he’ll gently take them out for you before you go to bed <3 he’ll also plug your phone in for you if you forgot
occasionally reads aloud to you, especially if you’re having trouble sleeping. we all know he’s not much of a talker, but his voice is so relaxing and he doesn’t mind doing it if he knows it will help
the chillest, coolest boyfriend ever. he’s so mature, honest, and trusting, and you don’t have to worry about those high school dramatics when you’re dating him. when he chooses to date you, he’s serious about it - definitely not the type to just date for fun. he won’t hesitate to deny advances from other people, doesn’t care about what you wear, just fully devoted to you and wouldn’t even think about anyone else
i also think that with that dating in general, you would probably start out as acquaintances or maybe even friends. he needs to have a lot of trust in the person he chooses to date, so only after he’s known you a long time and you’ve made enough of an impact on his life for him to make it hard to let you go would he date you
speaking of, didn’t isayama say that levi would stutter around his crush? i can imagine him stumbling over his words, trying to cover it up with a cough, reaching to scratch his neck all sheepish, just getting all shy. even once you’re far past that stage of your relationship, sometimes you’re so upfront and bold, he can’t help himself :( you just make him so weak
braids your hair for you when you’re too tired to do it yourself - you’ll sit in front of him and his fingers are so gentle with your hair 🥺 he got the hang of it so quickly and has the dexterity to not tangle your hair and it always comes out so nice and clean, even if you’re just going to sleep in them
i peg him as a biiiig cuddler. not a lot of pda besides holding your hand, wrapping his arms around your waist, letting you hook your arm around his, etc., but in private he loves when he can just lay his head on your lap or chest bc then you can play with his hair, which relaxes him
he’s really intuitive and in tune with your emotions. if you’re feeling down, he’ll know, and he’ll also know if you need space or if you need comfort, both of which he is more than willing to oblige
he’s there to bring you cups of tea, maybe some cut up strawberries on the days you’re tired and want to sleep. will definitely tuck you in, and will also lay down with you for a bit if you ask
his go to way of getting you to talk is going on drives. 1) levi is a really good driver and 2) he’ll usually come and find you wherever you may be around the apartment, say something along the lines of, “i’m going on a drive, you wanna come?” or might just give you a look and jingle the keys around his fingers
it might take a little while of rolling through the backroads aimlessly for you to speak up, but when you do, he’s all ears. lets you talk through your thoughts, might prompt you further, offers advice if you ask for it. it’s also how you sort through relationship misunderstandings - they are rare, but all relationships have them, so it would be silly to present your relationship without them
i think that when levi is upset on the other hand, he’ll usually come to you for comfort. he isn’t necessarily looking for advice, but just to calm down and rest. some form of physical touch is good, like cuddling or napping, preferably where he can put his head on your chest so you can play with his hair
i think levi is the type of person to get a lot of intrusive thoughts or memories that he doesn’t really want to remember when they pop up, so having you as a distraction to hold him and let him know it’s alright is something he really appreciates
nsfw below the cut (18+)
unpopular opinion: levi is NOT the hard dom people tag him as. rather, i think of levi as a service top, so while he may be carrying out more of the work, you’re the one in control. getting you off gets him off 100%
considering he is usually very dominant outside the bedroom, he likes the opportunity to let you take control and direct him instead - it takes a weight off his shoulders
slow and smooth kisser. might put up a fake fight for dominance just to make it more fun, but eventually take the lead and kiss him dizzy
hearing your moans makes him unbelievably hard. the sounds you make go straight to his dick
and so: godly at giving head. he might edge you but it’s not to tease or as punishment, he just takes his time because he knows it feels better for you, and at the end of the day he wants you to feel as good as possible. your pleasure is his main priority.
knows how to use his fingers, knows how to use his tongue. knows what you like and picks up on it very quickly. i don’t think he’s that experienced but he’s got a good natural sense of what feels good - do not doubt him, he knows where the clit is
he’s got a very wide range of capabilities for this, too. he can go slow and sensual on a calm sunday morning or absolutely dive in and ravage your pussy for more intense sessions - this is the one time he doesn’t mind making a mess
making you cum is good for his self esteem/confidence lmfaooo he lives to see your flushed cheeks and heaving chest and be told he’s doing well. when you scratch his hair or cup his cheek as a quick thank you, his heart swells and his dick twitches
please kiss his neck, he will absolutely melt for you. especially the next day when he looks in the mirror and notices the little love bites you left him... he runs his fingers over them lightly and his eyelids get a little droopy as he remembers everything, will definitely seek you out for another round
tbh i don’t think he’s that kinky. he likes what he likes, i can’t imagine him comfortably degrading you or hitting you or anything like that. realistically, levi wouldn’t be having sex with someone he’s not in a committed relationship with. he wants it to be special and personal and therefore probably would not enjoy treating you poorly even if just for the sake of sex. if anything, he wants it the other way around bc he could easily be a bit of a masochist in bed
loves when you restrain him and ride the shit out of him, either by tying his hands to the bed or just pinning his arms down. likes when you “use” him to get off. put your hands around his neck and he’s putty in your hands
really loves when you tell him to cum - your voice is music to his hears and to hear it out loud and as a command has him doing exactly that. he’s not one to disobey orders lol.
his brows furrow, his eyes squeeze shut, mouth falls open and lets out a low moan... jesus christ
one more deep kiss, a quick clean up, and then he’s passing out with his head on your chest. after-sex sleep is some of the best rest he’s ever gotten
#levi ackerman x reader#aot x reader#snk x reader#levi ackerman fluff#levi ackerman smut#levi ackerman imagines#aot imagines#snk imagines#levi x reader#levi fluff#levi smut#aot headcanons#levi ackerman hcs#levi hcs#levi headcanons#levi ackerman headcanons
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Amazing (NaLu One-shot)
Summary: Natsu and Lucy's monthly routine is interrupted by a seemingly harmless question.
Rated: T
Words: 1998
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"Lucy?" Natsu scanned the room for his blonde teammate, a little hint of worry on his face.
Mira had told him about how she came into the guildhall incredibly grumpy that morning, and she's been cooped up in her apartment for the rest of the day.
The girls advised him to give her space for a bit, and while Happy decided to heed their warnings and lay low, Natsu knew good and well what was going on.
"I'm in the kitchen!" The sound of Lucy's voice was enough to prove that his suspicions were correct, she sounded so out of it right now.
Natsu poked his head into the kitchen, and gave a sad smile at the sight of Lucy hunched over on the counter. "You okay?"
"Do I look okay?" Lucy grumbled, "Where have you been?"
"We just got back from a job yesterday," Natsu rolled his eyes, "I was sleepin'."
"...Well, I need you. Now."
"Hm… It's early."
"I know it's early. Just be glad it's not while we were on the job. Now c'mon," Lucy held her arms up, Natsu quickly getting the hint and scooping her up to carry her.
"Bed or couch?"
"Bed, please."
Just as she requested, Natsu brought her to the comfort of her bed and gave her a moment to get situated amongst the pillows before he joined her in laying down.
The two wrestled with the comforter for a bit before ultimately deciding to go without it, and as patience began to run thin, Lucy pulled Natsu closer by his scarf, bringing his body flush against hers.
"You know what to do," She mumbled, earning a quiet growl in response.
"Yeah, I know," Natsu didn't like being rushed, but he knew she had good reason to be impatient. He wrapped his arms around her abdomen and warmed up his hands, Lucy immediately sighing in pure bliss from the feeling.
"Ah, yes…" She snuggled back into him, leaving no space between their bodies, "I've been waiting… all day for this."
Natsu frowned, had he known she was in pain, he would've came over sooner. "Sorry."
"Don't be. Like you said, it came early this month. Hit me like a ton of bricks, though."
"Then you should get something to warm your belly up when I'm not around…"
"I actually do have a heating pad," Lucy turned around to face him, making sure his hands didn't lose their place over the source of her pain, "But your hands are so much better."
Natsu couldn't deny that he really liked hearing her prefer his magic over something else, but a part of him still felt bad. He didn't mind doing this every month, it was the only time Lucy allowed him to not only be in her bed, but to also be this close to her while doing so.
It's nice to feel like she depends on him, and to be able to do something for her that no one else can. And their alone time during these days are always nice, sometimes she'll fall asleep in his arms, and other times they'll pass the time by just talking about any and everything.
But, he still hated that she had to be in pain for them to get this… close.
"Thanks for always doing this for me, Natsu," Lucy smiled. He couldn't help but smile back at her.
"'S not like I got something better to do."
"Mhm," She wrapped her arms around his middle, now each of them holding the other tightly, "You're the best. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"Me too."
"Really?"
"Yeah…"
"Aw, that's sweet," Lucy laid her head against Natsu's chest, closed her eyes and took in the peaceful moment. It was amazing to think about how she'd been in so much agony this morning, only for him to show up and relieve so much of the pain in seconds. She considers herself quite fortunate to be close with a fire mage like this. "...Do you think you could do this for me forever?"
"Of course," Natsu couldn't see how that could even be a question. He'll always be here for her when she needs him.
"You sure? Forever is a long time…"
"Yeah, it's not like it's hard to lay here with my hand on your stomach."
Lucy let out a quiet giggle, "That's not just it, though. Like, would you do it even in the distant future? When we're older?"
"...I don't see why not."
"Okay, and even when we go off and get married?"
"Uh, obviously… C'mon, I thought you were smarter than this, Luce."
"What? Don't start with that," She rolled her eyes, "Do you actually think our future spouses would be okay with us cuddling once month?"
Natsu stared at her, and when she didn't get a response, Lucy pulled away from his embrace to look into his eyes. He seemed genuinely confused, like there was something he was silently trying to wrap his head around.
"...Lucy."
"Yeah? You're thinking pretty hard there-"
"Why wouldn't it be okay for us to cuddle once a month?"
"Oh, c'mon. You know why," Lucy's face began to flush. It was obvious that these moments were pretty intimate, she'd only been ignoring it because her cramps are too ruthless for her to be worrying about that sort of thing.
But for him to be so confused, it was like he hadn't even noticed how close they are, and how close they've been since he started being her personal heating pad not too long after they met. Lucy assumed being able to lay with him like this was great progress in the direction she wished to go with him, but perhaps it's not reciprocated.
"Actually, nevermind. Just forget I asked-"
"Wait, I don't get why you think I'll stop doing this for you when we're married…"
"When we're-" Lucy shook her head, choosing to ignore his choice of words and the way they sounded, "Look, my future husband may not like you in my bed, holding me like this."
"...Yes I would, though? And you just asked me to do this for you forever, why would that change when you're my wife?"
It took a full minute for Lucy to process what he just said, and then another minute for her to replay it over and over in her head to make sure he really just said that.
Her face was bright red, burning nearly as hot as his hands on her stomach. "N-Natsu…" She willed herself not to stutter, but it was impossible with the way he looked at her.
"Yeah?"
"I didn't mean we'd be married to each other..!"
"What? Why?" Natsu's face broke out into a pout, and it was just the cutest thing.
Now, Lucy's heart felt like it'd just explode. "Oh my gosh! You seriously- I- I don't even-" She was at a lost, she'd been harboring these feelings for so long, just for him to blatantly admit something like that. "You… you'd wanna marry me?"
"Uh, duh?" This whole conversation had Natsu so confused, "We're basically already married anyway."
"W-what!? No we are not..!"
"We're not..?"
"No!"
"Oh…" Now the sadness on his face doubled, causing Lucy's heart to get tight.
"But…" She took in a deep breath. If he could say it so casually, she need to be upfront with him too, "I mean… I'm not opposed to being l-like… that with you…"
"Oh, so you're cool with it?"
"...Yeah, I'm c-cool with it."
"Cool. Now let's get married so you won't have to ask stupid questions like that!"
"Huh!?" Lucy squeaked when he began to sit up, stopping him before he could start carrying her, "Wait, lay back down!"
"Oh, right," He almost forgot about her current predicament, laying right back down and warming up his hands to offer her comfort. "We'll do it once you're done."
"Oh my gosh…" Lucy still wasn't convinced that this was real life right now, and that he was actually serious about this, "...We can't just go off and get married, Natsu."
"Huh? Says who?" Now he seemed to assume there was something coming in between them, the angry look on his face nearly making Lucy laugh.
"We aren't even dating yet…"
"...So?"
"So, we can't just get married when you haven't even… asked me on a date yet…" Lucy played with the loose ends of her hair, now refusing to look him in his eyes. It was easier to say these things knowing that he wants something like this, but it's still incredibly embarrassing.
"Oh."
"Y-yeah…"
The room fell back into silence, and Lucy let out an awkward cough when she realized he wasn't going to say anything more on the subject. "Uh, Natsu?"
"Hm?"
"...We can't get married before we start dating…"
"Yeah, I heard ya."
"...So, ask me on a date, silly!"
"Oh," Natsu had just assumed that was a rejection, he didn't know he could just ask like that, "Okay, uh, wanna go on a date?"
"I do!" As Lucy engulfed him in a big hug, Natsu's own heart began to flutter. She could be pretty confusing at times, but he was glad to have her right here.
"We can get married now, right?"
"Ugh," Lucy tightened the hug so she could hide her flushed face, "I don't know if you're doing this on purpose…"
He wasn't, but if it got her to react like this, he'd be sure to keep it up. "You're so weird."
"Me? You literally just assumed we'd get married! Imagine if I didn't feel the same…"
Natsu growled, he did not like imagining that. Besides, it was pretty obvious to him at this point, it's not like Lucy just let's anyone cuddle with her.
"And to answer your question- we can't get married now, that commitment takes time to think about."
"Eh? But I've had plenty of time…"
"...You've been thinking about it for that long?" Lucy's eyes sparkled, but she quickly brought herself back to reality, "I mean, no. That's something we'd need to discuss together in due time."
Still, Natsu couldn't understand why she'd want to wait so long, but if all she wants is time, he was willing to be patient. "Alright."
"Mhm. Leave it to you to wanna get married before we've even…"
"Hm? 'Before we've even' what?"
"...N-no, nevermind."
"C'mon, Lucy, I wanna know what else I gotta do."
"We, uh, we haven't had our first kiss…"
At the same time, they leaned back to gouge the other's expression, their eyes darting to each other's lips.
Lucy stifled an awkward laugh as she saw the look on Natsu's face, "Oh my gosh, are you blushing?"
He huffed, she was acting like her face isn't bright red right now. Before Lucy could convince herself that she shouldn't have said that, Natsu cupped her cheek and inched closer, her face heating up with each second.
Lucy knew he'd go for it as soon as she said that, and she fought the urge to cowar away when his lips came down to meet hers.
The kiss was quick and clumsy, but it had Natsu grinning against her lips and puffing out his chest in pride.
Lucy let herself giggle once they separated, she was overcome with giddiness and excitement. In her head, things would've been more romantic than an awkward confession in her bed while she's battling period cramps, but that doesn't matter right now.
"Can we kiss again?" Natsu mumbled, already leaning towards her lips.
Lucy answered by closing in the space between them, crashing her lips onto his and deepening the kiss.
Her hands ran along his body, feeling him up and down and enjoying every second before they had to separate for air.
"...Amazing," Lucy mumbled, though it wasn't like she had anything to base the kiss on.
Natsu was in the same boat, and he was actually more concerned about kissing her some more. "Yeah… Amazing."
#ft nalu#fairy tail#lucy heartifilla#nalu#nalu fairytail#natsu dragneel#nalu fluff#fanfic#oneshot#nalu fanfic#natsu x lucy
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Okay this may sound like an oddly detailed request but can you do a Laszlo x reader where Laszlo has been courting the reader for a while and has never met her father, because her father is dead or abandoned her at a young age or something like that and she never told Laszlo, but Laszlo is instant on meeting him for some reason or something like that?
Sorry if thats a weird request
Unofficial Meeting [Dr Laszlo Kreizler x Fem!Reader]
Word count: 1.8k
Warnings: a bit angsty, mention of old fashioned ideas
Author’s note: I hope you will like it and I respected your wishes <3
"Miss?"
The voice of your chamber maid called you distracting you from answering some correspondence.
"Yes?"
She smiled so widely as a bouquet of white roses and peonies was presented in front of you. She giggled as she was just so happy for you. You have been courted by Dr Laszlo Kreizler for some time now, but he never missed to send you flowers on a Saturday morning, it was his ritual since you two became serious.
"Those are so beautiful, miss"
She said excitedly before leaving you to read the note, she was probably living the romance through you which was quite weird but cute to witness.
You opened the card, Laszlo usually was a brief but intense poet, but this time the message was clear. Can I tempt you with a lunch at Delmonico's?
You frowned lightly before looking out of your window, his dark clothing making him strikingly visible in the greenery of the park in front of your house, he raised his hat for you and smiled.
Damn him and his top level courting.
You put your letters away and got ready spraying some perfume on you before going out, your maid helping you with your coat and hat.
When you stepped out of the front Door Laszlo was waiting in front of your gate.
"You could have called"
He smirked at you "it wouldn't have been a surprise" he concluded simply.
You smirked as it was true and you have also learned to admire the extent of Laszlo'd courtship. He was attentive and respectful, he knew when to trace a line to forbid any kind of bad talks. He was already famous for being a maverick and he didn't want to put that stigma on you too.
You obliged him as you walked your way together to the restaurant, he never failed to ask you about your day and your plans. he was very attentive and you reserved him the same tenderness asking him about his patients or latest articles.
Once you arrived at the restaurant you were brought to one of the best tables, Laszlo taking upon himself the honour to move your chair back behind you and then back toward you for you to sit comfortably.
"Thank you Laszlo"
He smiled proudly taking it as a compliment, but he looked rather stiff and tense for his usual mannerism toward you.
Once you ordered your meal he toyed with his glass of wine a bit attracting inevitably your attention.
"What is wrong?"
He looked at you surprised by your question, but he smiled because you sort of alleviated him from the weight of beginning what he wanted to ask.
"I was just wondering when I will be able to meet your father" he said just as directly as your question was "I met your grandmother and your uncles and aunts, I am missing somebody"
He said it quite easily as your mother had left this earth early for the standard and you regret she won't be able to see what an amazing man you met.
"You don't need to meet him"
He stared at you puzzled, what really concerned him wasn't your refusal, but more the hardness you showed into expressing it.
"I think I do"
You glared at him, your conversation briefly interrupted by the waiters landing the plates in front of the two of you.
He thanked them before looking back at you, your stern look still there.
You had discussions before but never of this size and also as much as he tried before to hint the theme of your father he wasn't acknowledged at all.
He also noticed how the rest of your family followed that same guideline, acting like they found you under a tree.
"I think it is something I have to do sooner or later"
You glared at him again.
"Stop it"
It was hard for him to stop. He was already launched on the theme and he was worse than a wild animal when he got fixated over a theme in particular.
You pushed some common ground theme while you ate. Like John or Sara's agency or other mundane things, but you hated to see the intensity in his look.
That question over and over into his mind.
You never hated to be with him as much as you did now.
You declined the offer of a dessert pretty quickly just wanting to go away.
Laszlo obliged and lead you back outside escorting you to your place.
"I don't mean to be invasive.."
"But you're" you confirmed to him "thank you for the lunch, I can walk myself home on my own”
You left him there moving after your house's gate.
He stood there biting the inside of his cheek nervously.
You didn't contact him any further on that day or the ones that followed, to be honest you avoided him and his flowers and attentions. You even stayed at home instead of attending places you were supposed to be, but where he also might find you.
Until your grandmother called you and you furiously ordered your maid to call the doctor and make him come at your place.
He arrived quicker than you expected. He was worried something happened, maybe you were ill and nobody told him.
When your maid showed him the way to your study and closed the door behind him he tried immediately to politely ask you about your state but your eyes burned holes like bullets in him.
“How dare you?” You growled at him. He stood still in front of you, his back straight even if you didn’t fail to notice the frown on his forehead.
“How dare you to call my grandmother? To ask her something I specifically told you I don’t want to share or talk or even mention? What is s hard about it? What makes you rightful to come bashing into my life asking for answers? “Y/N”
“No, no Y/N, you doctor, should learn to put a line between when you’re an alienist and when you’re a decent human being” you were being extra hard on him, but just earring your grandmother worried voice was enough to make you snap his neck.
He took your rage like a champion, even if he clearly was suffering it.
“Why is so important Laszlo? Why to see your mind at ease? It is just a man, somebody that doesn’t belong to my life, why you have to push it? Why you always have to push it?” “I just hoped..” “Hoped what? Hoped that a man that abandoned a pregnant woman while courting her was worth my time and thoughts? That I need to share my own life with somebody that wasn’t there? That never asked to meet me, or even see the woman he swore to every wind that he loved? That put my mother in the position of being considered a whore? How my grandma had to pretend I was hers to try give my mother a good shot at life?”
All those truths hit Laszlo like a bag of bricks, he was overwhelmed and saddened. Those situations were the ugliest in those times. Women always paying off the debts of the lust of men. The simple promise of a marriage just to gain something that could be tasted forever with a little more of wait. Just the human need to break a rule, just one, that revolutionary feeling that only losers at heart have. Because nobody makes a revolution over the expenses of a loved one.
“I had no idea” he concluded
“I hope you are satisfied now, your scientific mind has now all the puzzle pieces, now leave and let my family alone”
You could see his shoulders fall as you said that to him, his face paling in fear and sadness. He pressed his lips tight against each other, his jaw hurting as he didn’t know if at this point was really worth it to explain why he insisted so much. He ruined it, he tried to treat you with the white gloves and instead he hurt you even more.
“I apologise” he said staring at you, you letting him speak for the first time “I never meant to put you in such a position, I really just meant to be close to your family and I couldn’t see the fault in my own desires”
He admitted it but you didn’t wince, he crossed the line, he went too far and he needed to learn to respect the limits of others, not everyone needed to be under his care.
“I said you may leave”
He looked out of your window searching for words. Your anger was waving down as he looked so upset, and he should be.
“I am also a victim of our society in my own means, even if my behaviour is not excusable in any way, I stupidly fixated on the idea of doing things right with you and some things… Well, they teach us boys some things have to be asked to a father first”
You looked at him with a frown, you shook lightly your head as you didn’t understand his point and you were five seconds away from throwing him the vase with the latest flowers he sent you when you looked at him pul out a little velvet box from his inner pocket.
“The times are modern now, it was silly of me to try move past you like that” he leaned the box on your desk. He nodded at you respectfully leaving. You were left alone with that little box, you stared at it for a moment before moving closer to it.
You looked out of the window as you heard the gates closing and you watched Laszlo’s figure walk away.
Your eyes darted from his back to the box in front of you slowly opening it to find the ring of the dreams of any girl.
Tagged @cazzyimagines @lieutenantn @handmaiden-of-mischief@thesunflowersutra @zemomybeloved @fictionlandslanddreams @charistory @greeneyedblondie44 @apparrio @hb8301 @whatawildone @rhymerhymerhyme @thehuiabird @lilith-blackrose @unbeatablecurlgirl @obsidianlaszlo @alindeluce @zemosimp05 @baronesszemo-blackwood @nocapesdahling
Let me know if you want to get tagged to my publications too <3
#laszlo kreizler fanfic#laszlo kreizler#dr kreizler#dr laszlo kreizler#dr laszlo kreizler imagine#dr laszlo kreizler x reader#dr laszlo kreizler x you#dr kreizler x reader#laszlo kreizler fanfiction#laszlo kreizler imagine#laszlo kreizler x y/n#laszlo kreizler headcanons#laszlo kreizler x reader#laszlo kreizler x you
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Gestures and Evasion
Hello! Welcome to a new DT fic! My deepest apologies that it’s been so long, and thank you so much for waiting so patiently! Life’s been a bit of a rollercoaster recently, and I’ve needed a bit to recuperate, but I’m back again!
This prompt didn’t have a specific character mentioned, but luckily, since it wasn’t anonymous, I was able to shoot pistachoz a DM and they’ve confirmed it’s a Tenth Doctor request! :D
Warning: None, I don’t think?
Word Count: 3,514
Summary: Check out the prompt above! :)
(Gif doesn’t belong to me, credit to the creator! :D)
The Doctor doesn’t really remember the first small act he’d committed to try and get his companion to notice him. To notice him on a... well, on a more personal level?
It’s a general memory, nothing pinpointed, but he knows it happened long ago.
It was something small—mundane. (Y/N) had more or less brushed the gesture off with a light laugh and a smile that made his hearts hammer away in his chest, but (Y/N) had really seen if for what it had been.
It wasn’t very often that the Doctor had these sort of feeling about anything, but there was just something special about (Y/N). Something he couldn’t put his finger on.
He’d been trying for just about as long as the companion had been travelling with him to send little messages, or gestures in hopes that maybe (Y/N) would see what he was doing for what it was instead of brushing it off like she tended to do.
If he’s honest, he’s never really had this kind of problem before. He’s had many companions, and more often than not, those companions tend to want more from him than he’s willing to allow himself to give. Rose, and Martha—Jack, even—they were all looking for more from him, and being what he is, and what he does, it’s not that simple to reciprocate feelings.
They’ll all age and eventually die, whereas he’ll just move on to his next bout of regeneration with a broken heart he’ll have to try his hardest to keep under wraps.
The Doctor knows that maybe (Y/N) showing such little interest in him is almost a good thing. Less heartbreak down the road when (Y/N) decides not to accompany him any longer, or, worse, when old age takes (Y/N) away like every other human before her. It’s inevitable, and he really should have a stronger hold on human life compared to TimeLord life, but the loss always knocks him down for a while.
It should be a good thing, but he just can’t seem to bring himself around to believing that it’s a good thing. Not when every time (Y/N) brushes off a gesture he’s thought over, and put time and effort into, it fills his hearts with an unfamiliar pain he hasn’t felt since losing his family and Gallifrey alike.
It had taken him a while to notice he was even trying to win (Y/N) in a sort of courtship way. And it had taken even longer to realize he’d been doing it for about as long as he’d known (Y/N). It hadn’t seemed like it at the time, but looking back now, he can see how all the little comments and gestures were more than just friendly.
But she’d been brushing his attempts off since early in their travels. Shooting him a smile, but turning away when anything too even the slightest romantic turn. Avoiding his eyes when he stared fondly, or laughing it off when a compliment slipped past his lips.
He really didn’t understand it.
He could see the Gallifreyan romantic gestures confusing (Y/N), but the few earth gestures he’d picked up barely stirred anymore of a reaction than the Gallifreyan ones. He didn’t know where he was going wrong—how it was all being perceived the way it was. The wrong way. He wasn’t getting the reactions he wanted and... well, it hurt.
Both his pride, and his hearts.
It had started small with flowers—or, a flower. They were on a foreign planet, but he knew giving small gifts like a flower was one of the human gestures. So, he’d searched around while his companion was busy exploring, and located the loveliest flower he could find. It was mixtures of blues and purples; native to the planet but incredibly rare considering they only bloomed twice a year, for no longer that three days at a time.
The flower had a sweet smell; one similar to those of sweets from earth. For a while, before he’d remembered Earth didn’t have this specific species of flower, nor were they advanced enough in space travel to find one, he’d assumed they’d used the attractive scent of the flower as a marketing technique to sell their sweets.
The sugary smell Earth sweets had would always come second to the scent of this specific flower.
The exchange had been short, and less than pleasurable if the Doctor’s honest. He’d found (Y/N) sitting on the ground, just taking the calming atmosphere of the planet. His heart stuttered in his chest before he finally took those last few steps towards her, where he settled at her side and cleared his throat to gain her attention.
He’d held the flower out, rambling out facts as (Y/N) took the flower into her hands. She gave it a sniff, and fiddled with the stem and petals for a second before smiling down at it. She stared down at it, before looking back at him with an appreciative smile. He’d thought he’d won her over, but instead, she settled the flower on the ground beside her.
His hearts had cracked as his companion’s hand fell away from the flower, leaving it on the ground as she returned her attention to the world around her. He’d swallowed thickly before sitting himself beside her, not bothering to mention the fact his gesture had gone unnoticed.
It was the same ordeal when he’d ordered (Y/N) a space delicacy from one of his favorite planets, where his companion had taken the treat into her hands and tasted it without a second thought. Smiling down at the treat, before shooting him light smile as she licked her lips.
He didn’t know why he’d been expecting—hoping for—anything more than the usual ‘Thank you’ he always received when he did something out of the ordinary for his companion, but the mumbled words had filled his with a sense of sadness.
It was silly.
But he kept trying.
The gestures just kept coming. It was barely a forethought anymore. An unconscious effort to try and win over his companion—seeking this relationship (Y/N) quite obviously didn’t want. It was a sad downward spiral, but he really couldn’t imagine not trying to woo her. He’d been at it for so long, not trying sounded foreign.
He tried just about anything he could to get any sort of reaction. Any hint that his companion knew what he was trying to do. Any acknowledgment that she understood that he was trying. He’d prefer blatant rejection to this... whatever this evasive attitude (Y/N) was expressing.
Dinner in the stars.
Unique gifts from distant planets.
Various treats and snacks from wherever they happened to be.
He even tried to learn more about human things on earth. How humans went about stuff like this, and how it all differed from his Gallifreyan roots. Human courting was quite the oddity.
He didn’t talk to many humans who weren’t his companions, or people he’d saved in some way or another, but the man who ran one of the shops had taken some time to educate him, but the Doctor had come out of that conversation more confused than he’d gone in.
But on the bright side, (Y/N) had enjoyed the bag of sweets he’d awkwardly bought to stand at the register and chat with the friendly shopkeeper.
He was still at a loss. Nothing seemed to be working. Nothing wooed his companion. He didn’t understand—couldn't see how not one single thing he’d tried had gotten (Y/N)’s attention.
But he still had one more thing up his sleeve.
“Where are we going?” (Y/N) asked cautiously from the seat in the console room. The Doctor was doing his usual laps around the TARDIS console to what should be six TimeLord’s jobs simultaneously. He’d gotten good at it over the years, but there was still, occasionally, some rough kickbacks when he couldn’t be everywhere at once.
“It’s a surprise,” the man shot his companion a grin, pulling a lever. At this point, (Y/N) should be used to the surprises. He never got the kinds of reactions he was looking for, but he was still hoping that... maybe sometime he would. That something he planned would be the special one that could win his companion over.
(Y/N) didn’t reply, but continued to watch the Doctor how around the TARDIS like a madman.
They weren’t far from the next greatest surprise the man had planned. They’d been travelling a little under an hour, and (Y/N) had only joined him in the console room ten-ish minutes prior, but he’d still refused to tell her where they were heading.
(Y/N) was still quiet when the Doctor stabilized his space and time machine, checking everything twice before finally tugging his companion up by the hand and leading her towards the doors.
He threw the doors open, grinning widely as he gazed around. Just as promised.
It was a phenomenon really. A collection of heart shaped carbon monoxide ice chunks. No one was quite sure how they’d been formed, or whether someone had carved the hearts and left them to float in this tiny orbital pull in the middle of nowhere.
It was a sight few saw—the Doctor had only heard of this place from chatter on a nearby planet, but he had to admit it was just as beautiful as he’d imagined. The ice glistened as the light casted from the TARDIS hit it, making them twinkle just as brightly as the stars in the background.
It was about as romantic as you could get.
“Woah,” (Y/N) gaped at his side, and the Doctor turned to look, smile slowly lighting up his face as he watched his companion’s eyes travel from heart to heart. “What... what is this?”
“It’s carbon monoxide ice,” the Doctor informed softly, the smile on his face widening as his hearts thrummed in his chest. His companion had an astonished look on her face, eyes wide with childlike curiosity. “Like that of Mars in your solar system. No one’s really sure how they take shape but... well, they’re quite the sight.”
“It’s beautiful,” (Y/N) breathed out, almost like her breath was taken away by the sight.
The Doctor had been told by many, had seen for himself as beauty takes away people’s breath. He’d been there too, once or twice with his current companion.
He barely even caught his words as they left his mouth—his heart speaking before his brain had a chance to filter his words, “Like you.”
That was his moment of error, the Doctor noticed.
He frowned to himself as his companion slowly pulled themself away, shying away from his side and retreating back into the TARDIS with one last lingering glance at the ice. The Doctor’s hearts froze within his chest, as he watched uncertainly—unsure just how he’d managed to mess this one up as well.
“It’s late,” (Y/N) muttered softly before leaving the Doctor alone in the TARDIS doorway, the man’s gaze locked on one lone heart with a barely noticeable crack down the center. It wouldn’t be long before the orbit around them pulled the frail pieces apart, severing the heart into two.
The TimeLord forced a breath, squeezing his eyes shut for just a moment as he resided completely with the cracked heart.
He didn’t understand.
The clumps of frozen carbon monoxide made his hearts hurt the longer he stared, so he was quick to follow on his companion’s footsteps, spinning on his heels and shuffling back inside, making sure to shut the doors behind him.
He wanted to flee this place, this failed attempt, but he couldn’t bring himself around to flying the TARDIS at the moment. He didn’t have the energy too. Like expected, (Y/N) had disappeared into the TARDIS, so the Doctor plopped heavily down on the seat.
Maybe it was time to accept the fact that his companion did not reciprocate his feelings. That he was barking up the wrong tree. He’d thought that they were... but maybe he was wrong.
The Doctor stared up at the TARDIS ceiling, his space and time machine giving a little hum as if she could feel his worries and mood. His hand patted the back of his seat halfheartedly as a promise that he was okay.
It had never been this hard with any other companion. There was just something so special about (Y/N). Something he wanted to get closer too, even though he knew he’d end up hurt in the end. Something he wasn’t sure he’d ever get now.
Maybe it was time to settle this once and for all. His gestures were overlooked, or, maybe even ignored. As much as it hurt to admit, (Y/N) didn’t seem very enthused with anything he’d done. Maybe it was the human not understanding what he was trying to do—but humans tended to like words.
--
The Doctor from (Y/N) in her room, perched on the edge of her bed. (Y/N)’s attention raised when the Doctor announced his arrival with a sturdy knock on the slivered-open door. The knock pushed the door in enough for the Doctor to poke his head in.
“Do you, uh, have a moment?” He asked cautiously, almost ready for the rejection he’d been living with for the better part of travelling with (Y/N). He’d grown used to it, but it still tugged at his heart strings. She’d never deny him conversation, but he could still see and feel her pulling away from him.
“Of course,” (Y/N) sat up a little more, giving the Doctor her full attention. “What’s the matter?”
He hadn’t thought this far ahead, the Doctor realizes as he shifts from foot to foot in (Y/N)’s doorway, mind vacant of any thoughts. (Y/N) tilted her head at the Doctor’s odd silence, studying him from her spot, “Doctor...? Are you okay?”
“Yes,” the man cleared his throat. Then did so a second time before continuing, “I wanted to, uhm, know what you thought about the, uh,” he gestured broadly behind him, hoping his companion could piece his question together.
“The ice hearts?”
It was a good thing his companion was so clever.
“Yes, the hearts.” The Doctor nods, fingers tapping awkwardly against his side. “Did you... did you like them?”
“They were beautiful,” (Y/N) repeated once again, fidgeting with her own fingers, “it was a bit unexpected, but... yeah, I did. Thanks for showing me them.”
The man gave a nod, but didn’t voice anything. If he thought his voice would’ve come out naturally instead of the anxious waver he was sure would be there, he definitely would’ve replied with a soft ‘My pleasure,’ because it really was his pleasure to introduce (Y/N) to the beauty of the galaxy.
There was an unsettling moment of silence where neither really knew what to say.
It was the Doctor who broke it, staring at his shoes as he finally allowed the words he’d been stewing over out, “do you... not like me, (Y/N)?”
“What?” the surprise was prominent. The word rang out for a second before the Doctor lifted his gaze to settled on (Y/N)’s shocked, tense frame. Her muscles were stiff, body sitting up straighter and more alert than she had been when he’d first asked to talk. “I like you plenty,” (Y/N) assured quickly, “what gave you the idea I didn’t?”
There was a list, really. He could count things off on his fingers, but he wasn't here to be petty. The man bit his lip, leaning against the doorframe to support his weight. He honestly just wanted to know why (Y/N) was so evasive every time he so much as tried to woo her.
“You... well, uh, you never seem to care,” he made sure to word it carefully, “I... I’m not sure if you even notice, or ignore it, or what. I just, I need you to be honest with me. Why haven’t you... reciprocated any feelings?”
“I’m not sure what you mean, Doctor,” (Y/N)’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and one ankle crossed over the other as she leaned forwards in interest.
“Since I met you,” the Doctor swallowed, “I’ve been... I don’t know how to say it but, trying to court you, I suppose? That’s not really something humans do, but it is something TimeLords do. It’s just that... every attempt I’ve made... every try I’ve made to do something cute, or romantic, you brush it off. You’re evasive, and... I’d just like to know if that’s because you don’t reciprocate my feelings. If you don’t feel the same, we can just put this all behind us.”
“It’s not like that,” (Y/N)’s voice was quiet, a near whisper, “please don’t think it’s because I don’t like you. I do, Doctor. I just... I wasn’t sure.”
“Weren’t sure?” The man furrowed his eyebrows, “sure about what?”
“I didn’t want to risk our friendship. I noticed everything, the flower you gave me, the sweets. All the dinners, and the... the dates. Today with the ice hearts even. I didn’t know how to admit I liked you when there was a chance you didn’t like me back the same way. I don’t know what I’d do if I ruined this.”
“But the gestures and dates?” the Doctor frowned, finally stepping into (Y/N)’s room and sitting on the edge of her bed beside her. He’d thought he was being obvious.
“Very obvious,” his companion let out a little laugh, “and I should’ve known, but I was scared. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me. This adventure is a once in a lifetime opportunity, and I didn’t want to compromise that by admitting my feelings.”
He could understand that, a bit. “So... you do like me too?”
“Of course,” (Y/N)’s smile was soft, “a lot, Doctor. I just... didn’t know how to reciprocate it without there being a possibility that everything could fall through, and we’d ruin our relationship in the process. I know you were offering it, but I was nervous. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize,” the Doctor chastised quietly. He paused for a second before speaking again, “I’m having a hard time believing this is real,” he admitted with a tilt of his head, “you really acknowledged it all? I... never noticed.”
“Yeah,” (Y/N) smiled softly, “and I have proof it wasn’t all in vain, Doctor.” (Y/N) stood up from her spot on the bed, and moved towards her book shelf. It housed a few books, and some trinkets she’d found on their travels and liked. She continued speaking as she searched through the books, “I really enjoyed everything you put together for me since I met you. I wasn’t sure you were really doing it all to be romantic at first but... the hearts today really summed that up for me.”
The man watched as she tugged on one of the book’s spines, pulling it from the shelve and holding it in her hands for a second before she waving to retake her seat. She started flipping through the pages, so the Doctor leaned over her shoulder to watch.
“Here,” she stopped on a page towards the middle of the book. The Doctor refrained from gaping as his companion carefully pulled that singular flower he’d given her all that time ago from the book. The room was instantly filled with that sweet, alluring scent and his hand shook as he took the pressed flower into his fingers by the delicate stem.
“I thought you left this,” he admitted softly, studying the vibrant colours that had stayed even after being pressed into the book. He hadn’t noticed her bringing the flower back. Had really thought she’d left it on that planet and ignored the gesture entirely.
“I couldn’t,” his companion sighed, “it was selfish, even if I didn’t want to ruin what we had, I wanted to keep it to remember the moment. To remember you, even if we did at some point part ways.”
“You’re brilliant,” the Doctor breathed out, finally passing the flower back like it was as precious as a crown jewel or something. “So incredibly brilliant, (Y/N).”
(Y/N)’s cheeks flushed and she ducked her head away from his gaze, but it was different than the usual brushing away of his gestures. Something was different now.
They hadn’t cleared it all up, that was for sure. He still had questions, and she still had doubts. They didn’t quite understand each other yet, but it hadn’t all been in vain like he’d thought. She’d seen it all. Acknowledged it, even if not to him. His hearts swelled as he smiled lightly.
There was still a lot they needed to discuss, but for right now, the Doctor just wanted to spend a bit of time with his companion—without all the hassle of their rightful doubts and insecurities.
“Do you think we could... spend a little while longer looking out at the frozen carbon monoxide outside before we leave? It really is quite pretty, and... maybe we can talk about this more later?”
“I’d... love that, Doctor.”
“Good. Uh, great,” he cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. His companion giggled at him, but he didn’t mind in the slightest, “allons-y, (Y/N).”
<><><><>
Once again, sorry this took so long! I’m hoping to keep this momentum going and keep getting out the requests in waiting! I hope you all liked this fic, it was a bunch of fun to write! I thoroughly enjoyed creating the frozen carbon monoxide hearts, so I hope you all liked that as well!
As always, feel free to prompt me again if this wasn’t what you were looking for (though it might take a while to get around to it if you do!) and thanks once more for requesting. Hoping everyone had a good morning/day/night!
#Tenth Doctor#tenth doctor x reader#tenth doctor x you#ten#10th doctor#10th doctor x reader#10th doctor x you#10#doctor who#doctor who 2005#TARDIS#writing prompt#writing requests#reader insert#fanfiction#fanfic
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Cute + Awkward Headcanons (SFW/NSFW)
Trying to turn a bad day around, so I thought of these
Lucifer
Sometimes you can’t tell if he’s giving you bedroom eyes or if he’s actually angry. Lucifer has spent THOUSANDS of years glaring at his brothers and doesn’t know if he’s just staring or glaring
I think he’s super out of practice with romance so he’s hella awkward but when he gets that first positive sign that you’re into him, the charm and pride wakes up and suddenly he’s smooth AF
Flirts so formally he misses his shot 8/10 times
Has a habit of trying to police you like one of his brothers and it’s a knee-jerk, 1000+ year reaction to looking after 6 man-children of various difficulties. Always owns up and apologizes
Has accidentally almost made you pass out from kissing too long. Forgets you don’t have the same lung capacity
BRUISES YOU TO HELL! FORGETS SO MUCH! FEELS SO BAD!
That’s why he has the gloves, to soften his grip because he was one of the strongest in the Celestial Realm and that translates to power in the Devildom
Only complains to you about his back pain from long nights burning the candle at both ends. You find it cute and sad at the same time
Is probably physically very heavy given his stature and the weight of his wings, so if he falls asleep on you, you’re trapped
Rare midnight snack dates when he MUST finish papers by the deadline.
You may or may not have had a Demonus date in his study when a particularly bad batch of paperwork was finally done
You’ve probably cracked at least one (1) antique wood chair
Quickly learned he CANNOT spank you because that shit seriously bruised your ass. You either need a strengthening charm or he has to re-learn how to use his strength around people
That caused one awkward visit to the infirmary because you didn’t know if you were just sore, pinched, dislocated, or cracked. Turns out you were fine. There was no mistaking that hand print, though
It was the second time he’d apologized so profusely in his life. There was no pride left in this man.
You had a special cushion to ease the pain and it looked top of the line (hella fancy. Could probably resell it as fake Gucci in the human world.)
Lucifer gives me big dom vibes and orgasm denial/over-stimulation kink because of his pride basically demanding you beg for him. You passed out at least once from over-stimulation.
When you first start dating he wouldn’t want to own up to any awkward boners so if you sit in his lap while he’s taking a paper break, he’ll make every excuse under the sun (”That’s my belt,”, etc.)
Mammon
This boy is nothing but awkward moments, are you kidding me?
It’s a lot of ‘open mouth, insert foot’ because he can’t be upfront with his feelings. It’s partly not wanting to lose any ‘cred’ he has with people, but also because he’s embarrassed and can’t be honest
There’s lots of tracking you down to sort out things you might have overheard (that he didn’t honestly mean if they sounded bad)
Super sentimental about anything to do with you. You once kissed a piece of Grimm as a good luck charm for his exam and he’d kill someone over it. Always has it on him.
This lovable doofus just assumes you’re dating because you’re always together and you’re perfect and he’s your best man so who’s better?!
When you actually ask him out (with something silly, like ‘I think us dating would be pretty cash money’), he’s so confused. (”But we’ve been dating for, like, a month! Right, human?!”)
He talks big but he’s weak. You’ll always be able to fluster him
Wanted to make love to you on some Grimm and quickly realized that it’s uncomfortable. Porn lied to him and the idea’s ruined. You guys cut the session short to find every piece of Grimm so you can actually lay in the bed
Tends to plunk his head down on your chest and demand scratches/cuddles and has bruised you several times.
Accidentally fought you once or twice for his glasses while half asleep. Levi, Asmo, and Satan used to take them and hide from him
You learned he’s actually hella blind (contacts with non-prescription sunglasses or prescription yellow glasses) and have walked him around the House of Lamentation several times when his glasses went missing
He’ll complain about his brothers having it out for him and getting back at him, but it turns out they just wanted to make an excuse for you guys to hold hands. It’s like a date!
Made you hit your head on the headboard once when he was doing missionary style. Had to stop and check on you, then it got awkward. He cuddled and kissed you the whole time, though. Even got you an ice pack!
The type to flirt with you, try to lean on something, and take himself out on the way down
You’ve had a few of those cliche ‘trip and fell on each other’ moments
Has accidentally swung you into doors and walls trying to scoop you up and run/march out of a room
Levi
This boy is also super awkward
When you’re alone, he’s an absolute sucker for any kind of affection you can give. This boy will literally slither across the floor to make himself comfortable in your lap so he can game.
Pet his hair. He loves that.
Will also have to re-train himself on how to be with you in public. With him, it’s not making fun of a ‘normie’ as much.
Not big on PDA but will definitely hold your hand. How ELSE are people going to know you’re together?!
You get cute matching shirts or jewelry with the ‘Player 1, Player 2′ theme
Does a lot more snake-like things with his tongue. Especially when frustrated. Rub his jaw and chin to see it come out a little bit. It’s like a happy floppy dog tongue, just not as long or wide.
Craves a soft, warm thing to sleep on. You will be his new bed.
The first time you had sex, he broke out his demon form because he looked at you and loved you. He knew he’d get jealous if anyone ever saw you.
Was a little clumsy but determined. Sank in and started going at it, but wanted to look down and watch. He got his horns stuck in your hair and had to stop.
Is #1 fan when you’re naked. (”Ugh. Smother me.”) Boy can’t stand it. He needs it.
Tries to dress a little nicer (even if it’s casual) when you guys go out on dates.
You pack little snack bags when he stands in line for midnight releases and GODDAMN he’s gonna marry you?!
If you’re napping together and someone comes to wake him up or needs you, he just glares at them from underneath you, tail swishing threateningly. No one takes his human, okay?!
He has over-the-ear headphones but I bet he carries earbuds and has probably done that ‘share an earbud’ thing to hold you close and listen to music
Do you need to get up while he’s still sleeping? Untangle yourself and tuck your pillow in his arms. He’ll be fine. Bonus: you get to see the snuggling in action.
Between all the anime and centuries in the Devildom, he’s gotten used to using tails as another way of expression. They act subconsciously based on what the demon’s thinking. He’s surprised both of you several times by accidentally wrapping you up in his tail because he doesn’t want you to leave.
When he gets visibly uncomfortable in social situations, slip him something with your scent on it. It’s comforting. If you make up an excuse to get him out of there (he’s your escort and all), he’s over the moon.
Satan
Had more awkward moments than he’s willing to admit, but he’s more open about them than Lucifer. Basically, if someone guesses it happened, he won’t deny it.
BOY HAS A BOWTIE KINK. PLAY WITH HIS. STEAL ONE AND WEAR IT!
Has probably tripped over books walking you through his room or rushing to answer the door (not that you’d know how happy it makes him).
There’s a 50-50 chance that he’ll steal a glance and act like he didn’t, hiding behind an upside down book or something
Has definitely dropped books on his head after charming them down from the shelf. Your voice just sucks all his concentration up. You get bonus points for checking on him because some of those books are HELLA HEAVY
Say the right thing during a quiet tea session and you might hear him choke
Has probably been outed by one of his friends. Satan always seems to make friends without trying and gets invited to tons of stuff. What didn’t seem like a date turns out to DEFINITELY be a date (according to the friend).
Plan some silly treasure hunt/detective date and this guy is yours for life (especially if you’re the prize at the end).
Isn’t the most upfront about the disdain for his demon form, or how he feels weird about not being a true angel (just an extension of Lucifer), so expect a lot of raw, near-tears conversations in his demon form.
Hold him, run your fingers along the inside of his wings and the tips of his horns and Satan hugs you like there’s no tomorrow. He’ll cry, but he doesn’t regret these tears because they’re healing.
Weak for hand kisses. Smooch them hands.
Not super into PDA, but he’ll do other things to show he cares like carry your books and make sure you know what the weather’s like before you leave
Satan still hasn’t lived down the time Lucifer and the others broke down his door because they smelled blood and thought he’d hurt you. Turns out you guys were having sex and he just bit too hard.
Wouldn’t talk to any of them for a week. He swept you up on an impromptu hotel vacation and you continued to avoid everyone by shopping and eating at cafes.
The type to hold your panties hostage or like a trophy. Gives them back eventually, and enjoys watching Mammon almost have an aneurysm as he tries to figure out why his room smells so strongly of you.
Tea dates, cat cafe dates, and plenty of couple pictures with cat filters. Satan’s Devilgram activity goes up substantially when he’s dating.
You’re not his lock screen, but you’re his background.
Asmo
When you two start dating Asmo is literally the happiest demon in all of Devildom. Yeah he’s smug and cute like ‘how could they NOT fall for beautiful me?’ but boy is literally so stoked. All of that babble’s just a cover for how sickeningly happy he is
Thinks the world of you.
Wants to spend all his free time with you, be it napping and cuddling, shopping, getting pampered, or just doing your nails.
Now that he has that real, true love he doesn’t want to be without you.
You trend on Devilgram at least once
SO MANY PICTURES
Took you shopping for perfumes and has the tester strip you used to pick your perfume taped to his vanity. Then he can smell it whenever he likes!
Gives you a small thing of his cologne for when you get lonely or want to smell like him
Boy is super, super extra. Probably has matching shirts that say he’s yours and you’re his.
The type to get couple’s pillows, cups, and pajamas. You also get couple’s massages.
If you wear lipstick, he’s definitely made you a custom one at some exclusive-invite Devilgram event. He put your initials on the base of the tube and thinks it’s the cutest damn thing. His pride and joy--it’s basically a child.
There’s no shame in the bedroom with this one. I really doubt he’d have awkward moments because he has a lot of experience and has run into a lot of things that he’s handled one way or another. It’s gentle coaching and some sweet teasing.
The most embarrassing thing he’s ever done is probably moaned/whined at the wrong time. Or said something semi-naughty at a bad time. He’s not easily shamed so that doesn’t really matter, either.
He melts at the gentlest touches and will be SO dramatic about it, like half fainted into his bed.
Is easily hypnotized by jewelry. He’ll massage your ears if you have earrings in, cooing over them and wanting to look at them. If he’s laying on you and you’re wearing a necklace, he plays with it the whole time.
Beel
Smart but distractable. Beel’s love language revolves around protection and food so pack him a lunch for practice or bring him something from a town date with one of the bros and he’s super excited
He means well but forgets his own strength so there’s a lot that can go wrong in the bedroom
Has probably broken his bed several times
Had sex on the kitchen counter and the bros only found out because one of them was setting up dinner prep and one of the legs just gave out
Big, snuggly bear. Best hugs.
Hardest to wake up because he tends to sleep well and easily. It’s a side effect of being connected to Belphie. Will hug you to him and keep snoring. You have to get someone else to wake him up because he’ll just snuggle you the more you move around and talk
I headcanon that Beel does a tongue thing like Levi, mostly because his cardinal sin is gluttony and that helps get the food in his mouth faster. It’s not as slender or serpentine as Levi’s, but it definitely moves.
Has licked you in his sleep as an affectionate thing.
Loves to snuggle into your hair when he sleeps.
Bite mark king. He’s so affectionate and earnest when he makes love that he just ends up leaving all kinds of signs on you--mostly bite marks but when he’s conscious of leaving too many, they turn into hand prints.
Makes the purr sound when he’s inside of you. Purrs very easily.
Most of his awkward moments come from being oblivious. He’s the kind of guy you have to out-and-out tell you’re flirting with him, that you like him and want to date him.
Beel’s also very shy with flirting. He thinks you’ll just understand that he’s flirting when he shares food or wants to hug, or just anything. It can be missed because he’s generally chill and friendly.
Was royally embarrassed by Asmo (on accident) when he didn’t eat as much at dinner one night and you were ‘too tired’ to come down. Beel went to carry your food up and Asmo somehow found out he’d eaten you out right before. He was filled up on the human energy and you couldn’t walk to come down.
If you ride his face, grab his horns to hold on. It does something for him and his hands go crazy and he really eats.
Scratch his back and he’ll be your forever heater.
His PDA is carrying you because why not? It’s a workout AND you’re close. It makes him give that big, nice smile.
Belphie
The biggest issue is that he falls asleep on you all the time. He doesn’t mean to but he’s TIRED, okay?
Has a name for the cow pillow. Calls it ‘my moo.’ You are one of seven people that know that. Apparently it’s been a thing since he was little.
Has accidentally called you ‘my moo’ when he’s sleep delirious. It means you’re highly thought of. Beel used to be his moo, too, and now he’s been replaced.
This sloth will smother you. He’s like a koala that demands total contact to sleep
Gives you back rubs and massages. Sometimes he stays awake through them, sometimes you get sleepy and that makes him sleepy so he ends up falling asleep on your back.
Not big on PDA, but his version of caring for you is making sure you’re not bothered by annoying people. Wants you to sit with him at lunch though, and he’ll sulk if you don’t.
His favorite kind of dates are where you stockpile food and drink in the room and just feed each other while lounging in cozy blankets
If you make him any kind of pillow or blanket for a birthday, it’s at the top of his collection. Everyone will see it when they walk into his room.
You’ll plan dates in the star room where he just holds you and points out constellations until you fall asleep. Knows a lot of the mythology/stories behind them and shares that.
No matter the size, Belphie likes to cuddle between your boobs. He says it’s for your heartbeat and that they’re comfy like pillows. His tail wags like crazy when he does this.
Also big on physical contact due to his time in the attic. You just have to be alone.
Brush and play with his hair. That’s what he likes most.
Just hold this boy, okay? He needs it.
If you guys are trying to nap and the other brothers are being noisy, he’ll do the demon scream thing to tell them to shut the hell up. He’s an absolute angel to you though. You’re tired too, he knows.
If you get a little purple streak or something in your hair, he’s smitten.
Get him a kanigiri and the boy is super stoked. He’ll wear it all around the House of Lamentation. Bonus points if it has a hoodie or something he can throw up to annoy Lucifer.
Might get you a little stuffed cow toy so you have something to hug if you have to go away or can’t be with him.
The type to be restless if he can’t sleep with you. Will come to your room in the dead of night and ask to snuggle. It’s the only time he’s nice about it (and vulnerable), so say yes.
You get to be a human body pillow. He loves it very much.
#Obey me!#Obey me x reader#Lucifer x Reader#Mammon x Reader#Leviathan x Reader#Levi x Reader#Satan x Reader#Asmodeus x reader#asmo x reader#beelzebub x reader#Beel x Reader#Belphegor x Reader
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How the Peaky Blinders React To Your Scars
So the original request was a reader having a large facial scar she covers up, I tried to make it a lil flexible/easier to cover up, very similar to my GoT scar preference? sure why not
In this preference, you'll be with: Tommy Shelby, Arthur Shelby, John Shelby, Ada Shelby, Polly Gray, Michael Gray, Alfie Solomons, Lizzie Stark, Isaiah Jesus, Luca Changretta, Aberama Gold
THOMAS SHELBY
To be blunt about it, you intrigued Tommy more than most women because you were still startlingly pretty, and you had such a peculiar, almost haunting look in your eyes that he couldn’t help but be drawn in. He’d find an excuse to talk to you, even if you tried to dodge his attempts at conversation for one reason or another. Tommy would never stare or address you differently, he’d seem the same to anyone who knew him, but internally he was very interested by the mystery of it all.
He’d never ask you directly what happened, never. You’d have to volunteer that information, and he’d wait. However … as his affection grew, he’d grow protective even if you weren’t an item, and he’d begin to wonder if the person who did it was still alive, god help them. He’d become attached now, and anyone who stared or insulted you would be lucky to get off with just a harsh word.
ARTHUR SHELBY
You were used to people being startled when they looked at you, and Arthur was no different, so you brushed it off. Mr. Shelby worked with your boss, so you had to be polite. You just wish he’d stop staring whenever he came in to do business. The thing was, Arthur began to overlook the scar and was getting flustered from how sweet and charming you were. That was more disarming. The misunderstanding continued until he was waiting in your boss’ shop and overheard some man quietly insulting you to his friend… That ended with your boss hastily cleaning blood and glass off the floor and you alone with Arthur, dabbing a cloth on his bloody knuckles. He sort of blurted out the best apology he had, fumbling over his words and basically confessing how pretty and sweet he found you.
When you’re dating, any thoughts about the scarring falls to the wayside, as it’s just a part of you. Only sometimes when you look a little forlorn as you touch your face does he wonder what happened, though he feels like he’d just screw up if he asked about it. You know he still finds you lovely no matter what, because it just takes a kiss and a smile to get him to blush.
JOHN SHELBY
John puts his foot in his mouth constantly, everyone knows that. When he first saw you walk into the betting office to get to work, he blurted, “Did she get cut or what?”. Ada hit him so swiftly he stumbled back in surprise. He’d never seen a woman with scars like that, and you were still pretty, he realized a few minutes later. He knew what he said was idiotic, but it still took a few days before he managed an apology to you, feeling like a fool the whole time. He was interested, though, so John would hang around and talk with you when you weren’t busy. He started to get quite a crush, and it bothered him to think what happened to you. He thought back to all the men he cut, and it filled him with anger and disgust to think of someone doing the same to you.
Later when you two were an item, anytime John recalled that first meeting he felt his soul cringing out of his body. He’ll still randomly apologize for it, and you remind him it’s been more than a year at that point. It would be best to tell John what happened, because he’d think of all these scenarios in his head and it’d drive him a little mad wondering which was true. You better believe he’d become unreasonable and think of revenge if the person who did it was still around.
ADA SHELBY
Truthfully, Ada was drawn to you because she felt pity. It must have hurt so much, and being a woman, you must have been given a hard time, both before and after the ordeal … Well, you proved her wrong with how energetic and lively you were, not caring a bit about what people said. You didn’t even seem to notice it half the time. It made Ada think about how stupid and shallow her assumptions were… Also, it didn’t make you any less cute. She thought they were attractive, in an odd way, it only added to how interesting and different she found you. Her crush was hidden to no one who paid attention (which, granted, only Polly seemed to notice such things).
Ada wanted to befriend you right away, thinking she could keep that crush under control. Spoiler, she couldn’t. Whenever you show a more vulnerable side, worrying about how your scars look or remembering how you got them, Ada is quick to bring you close and give you plenty of kisses and reassurance. She’ll kiss your scarred side until there’s no question of her affection.
POLLY GRAY
She didn’t need to see the scars on your face to know you’d been through a hard time, it was there in your posture and your eyes, but you kept on. You worked for the Shelbys and you worked damn hard, although she wished you wouldn’t keep your head down all the time. Polly wish you’d speak up for yourself and stand your ground, and although she didn’t want to mother hen you, that would end up happening. For some reason, she felt a connection with you, although often she wondered if that was silliness on her part. When it came to the story of your scars, she’d let you come to her. It’d happen on a stormy evening when you were seated with her by the fire, full of warm tea, and the story would just come out.
You felt like you could tell her, and you could, Polly would take the secret seriously if you wanted it to be one. Still, she couldn’t help but think of who did it… If the person or group was still alive, still walking the streets of London, or hell - even Heath street - well … You wouldn’t tell, but she’d be silently struggling with what to do about it. After that, each time she’d look at your face, she’d get a nagging voice telling her to do something. Perhaps you didn’t want it, but perhaps you didn’t have to know.
MICHAEL GRAY
So, he’s a superficial young man, especially when it comes to women. He was disarmed by your appearance, even if he had to admit the rest of you was gorgeous. He knew it was an irrational feeling, but there it was. He didn’t want to get involved with a woman in the company, anyway. The thing was you were competent, and funny, and he relied on you more than once to get trickier deals done. Tommy trusted you as well, and it began to bother Michael when he noticed his cousin subtly flirting with you. It bothered him even more when someone commented on your looks - “Just look at her,” He’d hear someone sneer, and he’d loudly retort, “Yes, that color looks lovely on her, doesn’t it? She’s excellent to have at the company, for many reasons.”
He’d said things like that several times, but then you finally overheard. The defense startled you, since Michael always seemed so professional, so distant, but then you began to notice how protective he was getting, the little gifts he’d bring in, how many times he’d take you to dinners and parties. Eventually you had to just laugh and ask Michael if he was your boyfriend yet. A sudden kiss was your response.
ALFIE SOLOMONS
Frightening as he was to your father, Alfie was nothing but respectful and kind to you, even humorous. He liked to bring you something considerate, like flowers or some bread, whenever he discussed business with your father. It was so unlike the other men you’d met. For Alfie’s part, he’d never treat such a lovely, sweet lady any differently for something like a scar. He didn’t even care what the circumstances were, he was taken with you right away when he walked into your father’s establishment, and the scar didn’t add or take away from that. His favor wasn���t subtle at all, and as much as it flustered your father, Alfie made it clear he wanted to take you out at some point.
When you’re dating and intimate, he’s the sort of man to come to your defense no matter whose harassing you and what they’re saying. So, someone insulting your scarring gets the same punishment as someone whistling at you or questioning your virtue: Bloody bones. Alfie doesn’t like to show his temper in front of you, but protecting you is like a reflex. No one speaks about his girl like that. Much later when the cancer and the bullet begins to damage his eyes and face, he makes morbid jokes about how you two match and you’re clearly perfect for each other -- although you’re still far prettier.
LIZZIE STARK
In your first meeting, Lizzie immediately felt sorry for you, and that thought instantly bothered her. Who was she to assume you were some sad, lost bird? You seemed eager to work for the company, more focused on that than what you looked like, and she ought to not make assumptions. As Lizzie worked with you and became your friend, she stopped thinking about it, only glancing now and again if the light hit your scars just right. The problem with staring is she’d start looking at your eyelashes, then your lips, then your neck … Thank god you were too busy to notice. She hoped you didn’t notice, because then you might think she was looking at the scars… Although, in a way, they had their charm, too.
Lizzie is protective of you, especially if you don’t speak up. Anyone making a comment about you, even if it’s one of the Shelby boys, is going to get a sharp retort. She may even scold you for not sticking up for yourself, though you’ve heard everything under the sun at this point. She thinks you’re gorgeous and will tell you so, not settling for you blushing and shying away. She means it, damn it, and she’s not going to let a bunch of stupid men or stuck-up women make you feel bad about yourself.
ISAIAH JESUS
Because he’s helped his father with wounded men for years, scars don’t bother Isaiah like they do other people. He’s seen and helped patch up some grisly injuries that led to worse scarring. Isaiah was taken aback by your’s not because they were the worst he’s seen, far from it, but because he could tell what caused them and how much it could’ve hurt. While he was usually quick to flirt with any pretty girl in sight, it felt odd to do the same with you, almost disrespectful. So he approached you from a friendly perspective, and was glad that you both were able to talk so easily.
Once he gets to know you better and you’re friends, Isaiah wonders if it’s alright to give you some ointments to help if the scars start itching or aching. He asks his father for advice on this (his dad thinks the crush is cute). While he’s chill and easygoing when you hang out, his angry side comes out if anyone speaks out against you, and he knows plenty of young assholes who think they’re tough for harassing a girl. He’ll beat them up, no exceptions, though afterward he’d apologize bashfully for losing his head. Michael is the one who points out his crush during a night of drinking and Isaiah is too smashed to deny it. He’s completely taken with you.
LUCA CHANGRETTA
Most ladies Luca has been with are the more superficial type, meant exclusively to be arm candy, pleasure and little else. He was with one of them when he noticed you at a party. You had a bold, striking dress and an equally arresting smile - it took him a moment to notice the scars, but the people around you didn’t seem to notice, too interested in what you were saying. Luca liked that confidence, it drew him in right away. He liked that smile you had, it was crooked because of the scars, but it was cheeky and genuine. He spent much of the party speaking with you.
Luca liked taking you out on dates and spending money to please you. The more he got to know you, the deeper his feelings were, though he was mostly unaware of it until his father cheekily asked when you’d be introduced to the family. He was quick to your defense if anyone rudely commented on your scars or tried to ask you about them. Luca rarely thought of them after the first few dates, because there was so much else to focus on, in his opinion.
ABERAMA GOLD
It’s not just your unusual looks, but the sort of mystery that you give off that interests him. What can he say, he loves interesting people, especially if they’re pretty women. When he first started speaking to you with his usual charm, he realized that you didn’t believe him when he said you were lovely. Apparently you weren’t told that often, and that was a crime in his books. Each time you’d go out, he’d make a point to compliment your outfit and looks, and it was all genuine, even if you demurred or sighed in disagreement. You could’ve had scars all over and he’d still find you darling, and that was the truth.
While he wouldn’t push you to tell him what happened, often his mind would drift to it. He’d get angry thinking about who hurt you like that, and he’d idly wonder if they were still around … Maybe he could ask some questions, get some answers, so to speak. If you’d let him, he likes to run his fingers along them while he kisses you, feeling how soft the skin still is. He’d grin and offer to show you his old knife and bullet wounds … somewhere private, of course.
#peaky blinders imagine#peaky blinders preference#tommy shelby x reader#arthur shelby x reader#john shelby x reader#ada shelby x reader#alfie solomons x reader#lizzie stark x reader#isaiah jesus x reader#luca changretta x reader#aberama gold x reader#polly gray x reader#michael gray x reader#somebody plz give isaiah some gifs sob
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Ten steps ahead - Scott Lang x Fem!Reader
Pairing: Scott Lang x Fem!Reader
Warnings: Mentions of negative body image, sad reader, can get into some touchy subjects but nothing too severe.
Type: One shot
Request: *whispers* can you make a comforting scott lang fic where the reader is on their period and is sad for no reason. Sorry i just want comfort bye!(maybe that one giant ant lays with them on the couch like a dog while they watch sad animal memes)
Word Count: 1,790
Prompt: Scott Lang (baby) Comforts reader that’s on their period
Notes: Girl I feel you, this is actually the cutest request I’ve gotten. I didn’t get to add the big boi but I hope you liked this! I certainly enjoyed writing it. I want me a Scott when I get like this.
This always happens, when the time comes around to this lovely time of the month: mood drops, bloating, stomach aches, body aches really and not to mention, your self esteem seemed to plummet lower than the titanic.
You’ve been spending more and more time with Scott after his run in at the airport. There had been plenty of back and forth with you and him about the whole situation, though you knew the job he took up would endanger him from time to time, the experience still didn’t soothe your nerves. Thankfully after the airport incident Scott decided to stay low and only alternate between Cassie and the studio you were staying at with him and Luis.
Scott has always been great about picking up on small things, making sure you felt at home and cared for. It was no different when you started your period.
The pain at times felt unbearable, your mood definitely changed, you became more sluggish and reserved. Luis even managed to pick up on it. Watching you snuggle up in a few blankets, wearing an oversized sweater, fuzzy socks and avoiding making much movement, he began to familiarize himself with these actions during these few days every month.
“What’s up with Y/N?” He’d ask Scott when you wouldn’t be your usual self, to which Scott would just sigh and roll his eyes at the obliviousness of Luis.
This week was no different, you felt sluggish again, bloated. Passing by the mirror after you showered was no help either. You caught a glimpse of yourself, then stared a bit too long for your liking.
Of course, as it did at times, it sent you down a spiral, you began to overanalyze your body, parts of your body that were normal, stretch marks, bumps, cuts, bruises, discoloration, it seemed you were looking at yourself with a microscope until eventually Scott’s voice snapped you out of it.
“Y/N?” He called out from the hallway, the sound of bags rustling came along with his voice. You looked up frowning not knowing exactly what to say at first. “Yeah? I’m in here.” You tended to take longer showers in hopes of making yourself feel better, the heat of the water relieved some of the muscle ache. There was also hope that after the shower it would alleviate some of the sluggishness and grossness that you’d feel throughout the day.
Scott knew your ritual, he felt the warmth of the now-steaming bathroom from the hallway he stepped through. “I brought take out, I don’t know, I didn’t ask but- what’s wrong?” His smile shifting to a pout as you looked up to him, wrapped in a towel and headed towards the closet.
You didn’t know what was wrong, or more like, you didn’t know how to express it or even process it, but Scott seemed to be ten steps ahead of you.
Your eyes just gloomed over to his for a few seconds, it surely didn’t take longer than three for him to catch on. His pout remained, he always told you he wished he could help you more with the pain and the certain ickiness you tended to feel.
You had to admit, Scott was great, he was the best actually when it came to comforting you. Maybe it was because he had a daughter or maybe this was just second nature to him, either way you tried your best to keep him from feeling your wrath while you were menstruating.
“Oh. Well, get dressed, I know reheated food doesn’t taste the best.” Scott raised the bags gathered at his hands and just like that he disappeared into the living room. You always hated this part, getting ready after a warm shower, everything stuck onto you.
Tonight was no different, there was no way your clothes were going to show you any mercy whether you were bleeding or not. You slipped into a t shirt that fit you two sizes too big and somehow your hair managed to get tangled at the neck part of it. You growled in annoyance, it was no secret you were incredibly fussy, which only opted the men to exchange glances to each other from the living room they all ate at.
Sliding into the piece of clothing eventually, here came the most annoying part, the leggings and the socks. Sometimes they’d have a hard time sliding up when your legs were damp, no matter how many times you dragged the towel across your skin.
After what seemed like twenty attempts, you hissed in annoyance and tossed your socks aside a bit too hard. The sound of the pair of tiny socks hitting the cabinet across from you echoed through the bathroom.
Nobody knew what you were exactly up to, but the sound of something hitting a surface was enough to have everyone look to each other, The apartment wasn’t huge by any means, but when things would fall or hit any surface, sometimes it could be heard down the hall or even at the kitchen. Since there was nothing playing in the background while they inhaled their dinner, your frustration was taken into notice.
It was maybe Luis that was getting worried about you, Scott agreed that you were taking too long but it was obvious no one else was going to go check on you. Scott was the one encouraged to see how you were doing, which he would’ve done even if he wasn’t volunteered to do so.
“Y/n?” He asked as he walked up the hallway toward the bathroom, knocking on the door. You didn’t respond which only left him to worry more. “Y/n? I’m coming in, are you alright?”
You greeted him with watery eyes of frustration, you usually weren’t like this all the time but maybe today was just a really bad day. You made your attempts to have a nice relaxing day, but here you were on the floor, with your underwear holding a sticky pad that felt like a diaper, unable to put your socks and leggings on.
“Oh y/n.” Scott cooed, he tried to suppress his laugh, in hopes of not making worse. Walking over to you as you lowered your head, with hot tears streaming down your face. You couldn’t help it and Scott knew it. Although it was silly, he knew it wasn’t your fault.
There was not a word you could say, you knew your voice would quiver and it would send you down a spiral of emotions. Usually at times like this, one small sad thought would snowball into a bundle of depressing thoughts that maybe hadn’t crossed your mind in a while.
Scott didn’t hesitate to lean down and help you get your socks on, his touch was so gentle it made you want to curl onto him. You looked to him as his face puzzled when it came to your leggings.
“Well no wonder you can’t get them on sweetheart, are these new?” You couldn’t even whimper out a yes, only wiping your face with the back of your arm you nodded when Scott looked to you for a response. “I can’t even tell which one is the backside and which ones the front, it doesn’t even have a tag.”
You couldn’t help but giggle when you gazed into his frustrated look. “I have some shorts that are too small on me, we can figure out this pant situation later, come on.” Scott tossed the pair of leggings over his shoulder. Before he could stand, he looked to you, who although erupted a small laugh, still sat on the bathroom floor sulking.
It was then that you felt his arms slide from under you, hooking you from under your knees and your backside, he lifted you up with a grin in hopes that it would reflect onto you and admittedly it kind of did.
After you changed into the shorts Scott promised you, you were out and into the living room, everyone made the effort to not acknowledge what just happened, instead they focused on their phones, computer, TV or food. It was only Scott that greeted you and made you a spot on the couch.
He even brought you the two fluffiest blankets he could find, enough for you to cocoon yourself if you wanted to. You pulled your legs up towards your chest as you looked to the TV, it was Diehard that was playing on the screen, mostly as background noise to avoid hearing your irritated fit in the bathroom.
“Did you want to change the channel? We’re not really watching that.” Scott scoffed as he looked around the room. “Are there any cartoons we could watch?” You felt like a child, especially in a room full of people who had gotten away with crimes and all sorts of trouble, though you knew they weren’t violent per say.
When you were in pain or in any kind of miserable mood, cartoons, especially from your childhood, seemed to comfort you rather quickly. Scott knew this and it was a form of remedy for him as well, so he didn’t hesitate to fulfill your request.
It didn’t come as a surprise to him, he was happy to oblige, he’d be lying if he said him and Luis didn’t enjoy a few reruns of a few cartoons from their childhood.
You sat there in your cozy nest as Scott changed the channels, you took a few bites from your take out, it was still warm and fresh, just as Scott would hope. He truly was great, even with everything going on in the world and working with the avengers now, he still made the effort to make sure you were okay. Whether you were on your period or not, Scott was super attentive, even that would be an understatement.
He never suffocated you, maybe when you’d have pillow fights, or when he smothered you in blankets, but he wasn’t helicoptering over you.
A few hours passed and you both only shifted around to get into a more comfortable position, but neither of you had stood up since you sat down.
You and Scott didn’t give it much thought, he was sitting there, throughout the cartoon marathon he managed to scoot closer to you and you made your way to lean over towards him. His body was much warmer than the arm of the couch, not to mention more comfortable too.
Scott was even reaching over for your drink, bringing it up to your face so you didn’t have to take your hands out of your blanket, it was really the only time his eyes would leave the screen.
It was an odd site, but cute nevertheless.
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I Can Picture You So Easily
AO3
It hits Stan at the stupidest times.
Well. That makes it sounds like Stan just forgets, when really it never quite goes away — sometimes it’s just more.
Like now.
He’s looking in the mirror — he found it tucked way, way back in a closet (and he’s gonna skip right over that because when he got here the mirror in the bathroom was broken, cracked until you couldn’t see a thing and why was Ford—nope) — and he’s trying out a new look for Mr. Mystery.
Gotta keep it fresh, right? Accessorize?
Glasses aren’t accessories, unfortunately. He can’t go without them anymore.
(Really, he needed them years ago, but he was too stubborn to admit it, or too broke, or whatever, but he’s literally tripping over his own feet now. Needs must).
Ford wouldn’t be caught dead in this getup. No sense of fashion. So that’s fine.
The glasses—
(Ford started wearing glasses when he was six. Stan had laughed himself silly when they went to the drugstore and tried on the biggest, most obnoxious frames they could find. Ma had scolded, but she’d been too distracted checking price tags to do more than scold.
In the end, they went with some cheap horn-rimmed frames that Stan wouldn’t be caught dead in even now. Old-man glasses, at six. But that was Ford all over).
—they bring some stuff up. The twin thing sucks, sometimes.
(Looking in a mirror and seeing the changes, the lines in his face, the grey in his hair — does Ford have crow’s feet now? Is his hair going silver? It was always unmanageable — is it thinning like Stan’s is now, or is it still thick and flyaway, like it was when Ford was sixteen? Did he even live long enough to get lines in his face and aches in his joints, or is he forever twenty-eight, dead somewhere in the universe?)
Time to stop thinking.
Notice the differences.
Stan’s ears and nose are bigger than Ford’s, always have been. He’s heavier and his shoulders are broader.
(Has Ford gotten bulkier, fighting to survive? Or is still he halfway to gaunt, like the last time Stan saw him?)
Definitely time to stop thinking.
Stan flashes a smile, and yeah, that’s all him. Cheerful, magnetic, and a hundred percent fake.
Time to work the crowds.
*****
There’s an ad for the nice ink pens Ford saved up to buy when he was fourteen.
Stan turns it off.
*****
Mabel finds a picture, once.
“Grunkle Stan!” Her eyes are all lit up as she shows him the torn photograph. “I found this under a floorboard in the attic!”
If Stan ever had any doubts about his poker face, he can lay them to rest now. It’s all on the ropes and his expression is perfectly level, maybe even a little curious.
Mabel is still talking. “I didn’t know there were pictures of you before you were all old! Do you have any others?”
Oh.
Stan still forgets sometimes, even after everything, that most people can’t tell him and Ford apart.
He knows better.
The young man in the photograph is unmistakably Ford, taken while he was living in Gravity Falls. He’s got his head bent over that journal of his, but the photographer managed to catch the eager light in his eye, the edge of his smile.
Stan wonders who that photographer was, all those years ago.
A tug at his shirt reminds him he’s not alone, and he definitely can’t get messed up about this picture of his secret twin brother.
Mabel’s face has fallen a bit. “Grunkle Stan? Are you okay?”
Stan gives himself two more seconds to look at the picture — Ford just looks so happy; Stan can’t even remember the last time Ford looked like that, even before it all fell apart — and turns to Mabel.
“Yeah,” he says. He smiles and ruffles her hair. “Pretty good picture, huh?”
*****
The name is the worst.
Stan never thought identity theft could involve so little fun.
Usually he can get away with just “Stan Pines,” and that’s fine. That’s his name. That’s who he’s supposed to be.
Sometimes, though, that’s not enough for whoever’s asking.
“What did you say your name was again?”
He smiles. Lays it on thick. “Stanford Pines.”
“Could you sign here?”
He does. His blocky, uneven handwriting looks even worse than usual where he’s expecting to see neat, flowing script, the way Stanford Pines is supposed to be written.
“This is Stanford Pines,” someone will say. “Mr. Mystery.”
Stan smiles some more. Yes, Stanford Pines is certainly that.
Gideon is the worst. Stanford this and Stanford that and Stan’s never wanted to punch a child so much in his life.
“Stanford Pines!”
He smiles, and he lies.
*****
Dipper halfway drives him nuts sometimes.
It’s not like the kid’s a mini-Ford — he reminds Stan enough of himself, sometimes, though Stan’s not sure that’s great either — but he’s got the brains and the stubbornness and the love of weird nonsense, for sure.
He’s also got that obsessive edge, the drive that sent Ford right off the metaphorical cliff.
Usually Mabel tags along on the weirdness hunts — they make a day of it. They go out, just the two of them, and come back laughing and joking and shoving at each other.
That’s enough of a painful reminder, but sometimes Stan will catch Mabel sitting by herself, coloring or crafting with a little less energy than usual, and he’ll realize that Dipper’s buried himself in monster theory again.
He tries to keep the kid busy with chores and hustle, but it’s a losing battle.
It was the first time, too.
*****
There’s this old song that Ford used to love when they were younger.
It’s got no words, and Stan used to make fun of it — what's the point of a song with no words? But Ford insisted it had Meaning, capital M.
It comes on the radio now and then.
Depending on how masochistic Stan is feeling that day, he might let it play.
He still wonders what Ford heard in this song, and if Ford would hear it now.
*****
He realizes, one day near the end, that he’s been Stanford longer than he’s been Stanley.
What’s the point, really? What does a name matter if it’s so easy for someone else to take your place?
(Did Ford matter so little, in the grand scheme of things, that not one person could recognize him in a place he lived for six years?
Does Stan, in a place he’s lived for almost thirty?)
If he could just stop catching Ford in his reflection now and then, that’d be great.
*****
It’s not any better once Ford gets back (once Stan brings Ford back, the ungrateful bastard).
“Stanford!”
Stan’s got a smile on his face before he even turns around, and what’s wrong with him that he’s halfway made this lie into a Pavlovian response? Someone calls him Stanford, he smiles and lies.
(Stanford — the real Stanford — is in the basement right now. He doesn’t even exist, as far as anyone else is concerned. Stan is Stanford, Stanley is dead, and Ford is a nonentity.
What a life this is).
*****
“So how was it?”
Stan grunts. “How was what?”
Ford rolls his neck, wincing a little as he works out the unavoidable crick from hunching over a drawing for twenty minutes. “Being me.”
Stan shrugs. “Wasn’t hard. We’re basically the same person, y’know.”
Ford snorts. A long time (a lifetime) ago that comment might have gotten him worked up, but he’s steadier now, softer around the edges. “Very funny. I saw your lease renewal. You didn’t even change your handwriting, for heaven’s sake.”
“Ford, I rolled up to town, said I was you, and started a tourist trap. You had a total personality transplant and nobody noticed.” Stan grimaces. That sounded really bad.
Ford’s expression has gone rueful and a little sad at the edges, but he doesn’t seem like he’s about launch into full-blown self-recrimination, so that’s fine. “Yes, well. That’s what happens when you isolate yourself for six years and your only friend erases his mind to cope with the mistakes you made.”
And that’s Ford trying to shoulder all the blame again, but Stan keeps his mouth shut. They’re both too comfortable to argue right now. “Being honest — for once — it kinda sucked.” Ford’s looking at him, open and encouraging, so Stan keeps going. “Everyone thought I was you, and it—I wasn’t. I didn’t want to be.” Stan shrugs. “I wanted you you.”
Ford smiles, and it’s a little more worn than Stan remembers, but it’s real, and it’s him. “I understand. I met a few parallel versions of you on my travels, and they were you, but — they weren’t really you.” Ford closes his journal (his new one) and sets it aside, tipping his head back over his chair. More playfully, he adds, “I wouldn’t want to be you either, Stanley.”
Stan laughs. “Yeah? Couldn’t handle the salesmanship?”
“Have more self-respect than to wear any part of your wardrobe.”
“Says the man who wears sweaters in the summer.”
Ford lifts his head and smiles, and this time it’s almost exactly how Stan remembers — quick and a little crooked. “Fair enough.” Ford stretches, rolls his neck again. “For what it’s worth, Stanley, I am glad to be back.” A wry look. “Even if it’s going to take ages to sort out the criminal record you gave me.”
Stan slouches deeper into the couch. Any further and he’s going to slide off, but that’s a risk he’ll take. “Yeah, yeah. Talk to me when you’re legally dead.”
“You did that.”
“And?”
“I legally don’t exist.”
“I was trying to learn theoretical physics at the time, Stanford; cut a man some slack.”
Ford laughs, quiet. “Did I ever thank you for that?”
Stan cracks an eye open. He didn’t realize he closed them. “What, learnin’ physics? Because I’m pretty sure that’s some of the stuff that’s not coming back.”
Ford rolls his eyes. “For saving me.”
“Hm.” Ford’s thanked him several times, but lately it’s been less Ford kicking himself and more Ford cautiously trying to engage in the old back-and-forth they used to have, and Stan can get behind that one. “I dunno. Might have to say it again.”
“You’re burning through my gratitude very quickly,” Ford says mildly, “but all right. Thank you for saving me. You knucklehead.”
Stan never got called that when he was Ford. He thinks he’s missed it, at least the way Ford says it — like it means something completely different.
“Uh-huh.” Stan’s eyes are closed again. He figures he’ll just leave them closed. “Missed you too, nerd.”
And maybe there’s something to be said for being your own person.
It feels pretty good.
#gravity falls#gravity falls fanfiction#stanley pines#stanford pines#back on the angst with a happy ending train#feat. a side of introspection and melodrama!#i love it here
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A bathroom figures significantly in the origin stories of at least two classic One Direction songs. The first will be familiar to any fan: Songwriter and producer Savan Kotecha was sitting on the toilet in a London hotel room, when he heard his wife say, “I feel so ugly today.” The words that popped into his head would shape the chorus of One Direction’s unforgettable 2011 debut, “What Makes You Beautiful.”
The second takes place a few years later. Another hotel room in England — this one in Manchester — where songwriters and producers Julian Bunetta and John Ryan were throwing back Cucumber Collins cocktails and tinkering with a beat. Liam Payne was there, too. At one point, Liam got up to use the bathroom and when he re-emerged, he was singing a melody. They taped it immediately. Most of it was mumbled — a temporary placeholder — but there was one phrase: “Better than words…” A few hours later, on the bus to another city, another show — Bunetta and Ryan can’t remember where — Payne asked, maybe having a laugh, what if the rest of the song was just lyrics from other songs?
“Songs in general, you’re just sort of waiting for an idea to bonk you on the head,” Ryan says from a Los Angeles studio with Bunetta. “And if you’re sort of winking at it, laughing at it — we were probably joking, what if [the next line was] ‘More than a feeling’? Well, that would actually be tight!”
“Better Than Words,” closed One Direction’s third album, Midnight Memories. It was never a single, but became a fan-favorite live show staple. It’s a mid-tempo headbanger that captures the essence of what One Direction is, and always was: One of the great rock and roll bands of the 21st century.
July 23rd marks One Direction’s 10th anniversary, the day Simon Cowell told Harry Styles, Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne and Louis Tomlinson that they would progress on The X Factor as a group. Between that date and their last live performance (so far, one can hope) on December 31st, 2015, they released five albums, toured the world four times — twice playing stadiums — and left a trove of Top 10 hits for a devoted global fan base that came to life at the moment social media was re-defining the contours of fandom.
It’d been a decade since the heyday of ‘N Sync and Backstreet Boys, and the churn of generations demanded a new boy band. One Direction’s songs were great and their charisma and chemistry undeniable, but what made them stick was a sound unlike anything else in pop — rooted in guitar rock at a time when that couldn’t have been more passé.
Kotecha, who met 1D on The X Factor and shepherded them through their first few years, is a devoted student of boy band history. He first witnessed their power back in the Eighties when New Kids on the Block helped his older sister through her teens. The common thread linking all great boy bands, from New Kids to BSB, he says, is, “When they’d break, they’d come out of nowhere, sounding like nothing that’s on the radio.”
In 2010, Kotecha remembers, “everybody was doing this sort of Rihanna dance pop.” But that just wasn’t a sound One Direction could pull off (the Wanted only did it once); and famously, they didn’t even dance. Instead, the reference points for 1D went all the way back to the source of contemporary boy bands.
“Me and Simon would talk about how [One Direction] was Beatles-esque, Monkees-esque,” Kotecha continues. “They had such big personalities. I felt like a kid again when I was around them. And I felt like the only music you could really do that with is fun, pop-y guitar songs. It would come out of left field and become something owned by the fans.”
“The guitar riff had to be so simple that my friend’s 15-year-old daughter could play it and put a cover to YouTube,” says Carl Falk
To craft that sound on 1D’s first two albums, Up All Night and Take Me Home, Kotecha worked mostly with Swedish songwriters-producers Carl Falk and Rami Yacoub. They’d all studied at the Max Martin/Cheiron Studios school of pop craftsmanship, and Falk says they were confident they could crack the boy band code once more with songs that recalled BSB and ‘N Sync, but replaced the dated synths and pianos with guitars.
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The greatest thing popular music can do is make someone else think, “I can do that,” and One Direction’s music was designed with that intent. “The guitar riff had to be so simple that my friend’s 15-year-old daughter could play it and put a cover to YouTube,” Falk says. “If you listen to ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ or ‘One Thing,’ they have two-finger guitar riffs that everyone who can play a bit of guitar can learn. That was all on purpose.”
One Direction famously finished third on The X Factor, but Cowell immediately signed them to his label, Syco Music. They’d gone through one round of artist development boot camp on the show, and another followed on an X Factor live tour in spring 2011. They’d developed an onstage confidence, but the studio presented a new challenge. “We had to create who should do what in One Direction,” Falk says. To solve the puzzle the band’s five voices presented, they chose the kitchen sink method and everyone tried everything.
“They were searching for themselves,” Falk adds. “It was like, Harry, let’s just record him; he’s not afraid of anything. Liam’s the perfect song starter, and then you put Zayn on top with this high falsetto. Louis found his voice when we did ‘Change Your Mind.’ It was a long trial for everyone to find their strengths and weaknesses, but that was also the fun part.” Falk also gave Niall some of his first real guitar lessons; there’s video of them performing “One Thing” together, still blessedly up on YouTube.
“What Makes You Beautiful” was released September 11th, 2011 in the U.K. and debuted at Number One on the singles chart there — though the video had dropped a month prior. While One Direction’s immediate success in the U.K. and other parts of Europe wasn’t guaranteed, the home field odds were favorable. European markets have historically been kinder to boy bands than the U.S.; ‘N Sync and Backstreet Boys found huge success abroad before they conquered home. To that end, neither Kotecha nor Falk were sure 1D would break in the U.S. Falk even says of conceiving the band’s sound, “We didn’t want it to sound too American, because this was not meant — for us, at least — to work in America. This was gonna work in the U.K. and maybe outside the U.K.”
Stoking anticipation for “What Makes You Beautiful” by releasing the video on YouTube before the single dropped, preceded the strategy Columbia Records (the band’s U.S. label) adopted for Up All Night. Between its November 2011 arrival in the U.K. and its U.S. release in March 2012, Columbia eschewed traditional radio strategies and built hype on social media. One Direction had been extremely online since their X Factor days, engaging with fans and spending their downtime making silly videos to share. One goofy tune, made with Kotecha, called “Vas Happenin’ Boys?” was an early viral hit.
“They instinctively had this — and it might just be a generational thing — they just knew how to speak to their fans,” Kotecha says. “And they did that by being themselves. That was a unique thing about these boys: When the cameras turned on, they didn’t change who they were.”
Social media was flooded with One Direction contests and petitions to bring the band to fans’ towns. Radio stations were inundated with calls to play “What Makes You Beautiful” long before it was even available. When it did finally arrive, Kotecha (who was in Sweden at the time) remembers staying up all night to watch it climb the iTunes chart with each refresh.
Take Me Home, was recorded primarily in Stockholm and London during and after their first world tour. The success of Up All Night had attracted an array of top songwriting talent — Ed Sheeran even penned two hopeless romantic sad lad tunes, “Little Things” and “Over Again” — but Kotecha, Falk and Yacoub grabbed the reins, collaborating on six of the album’s 13 tracks. In charting their course, Kotecha returned to his boy band history: “My theory was, you give them a similar sound on album two, and album three is when you start moving on.”
Still, there was the inherent pressure of the second album to contend with. The label wanted a “What Makes You Beautiful, Part 2,” and evidence that the 1D phenomenon wasn’t slowing down appeared outside the window of the Stockholm studio: so many fans, the street had to be shut down. Kotecha even remembers seeing police officers with missing person photos, combing through the girls camped outside, looking for teens to return to their parents.
At this pivotal moment, One Direction made it clear that they wanted a greater say in their artistic future. Kotecha admits he was wary at first, but the band was determined. To help manage the workload, Kotecha had brought in two young songwriters, Kristoffer Fogelmark and Albin Nedler, who’d arrived with a handful of ideas, including a chorus for a booming power ballad called “Last First Kiss.”
“We thought, while we’re busy recording vocals, whoever’s not busy can go write songs with these two guys, and then we’ll help shape them as much as we can,” Kotecha says. “And to our pleasant surprise, the songs were pretty damn good.”
At this pivotal moment, too, songwriters Julian Bunetta and John Ryan also met the band. Friends from the Berklee College of Music, Bunetta and Ryan had moved out to L.A. and cut a few tracks, but still had no hits to their name. They entered the Syco orbit after scoring work on the U.S. version of The X Factor, and were asked if they wanted to try writing a song for Take Me Home. “I was like, yeah definitely,” Bunetta says. “They sold five million albums? Hell yeah, I want to make some money.”
Working with Jamie Scott, who’d written two songs on Up All Night (“More Than This” and “Stole My Heart”), Bunetta and Ryan wrote “C’mon, C’mon” — a blinding hit of young love that rips down a dance pop speedway through a comically oversized wall of Marshall stacks. It earned them a trip to London. Bunetta admits to thinking the whole 1D thing was “a quick little fad” ahead of their first meeting with the band, but their charms were overwhelming. Everyone hit it off immediately.
“Niall showed me his ass,” Bunetta remembers of the day they recorded, “They Don’t Know About Us,” one of five songs they produced for Take Me Home (two are on the deluxe edition). “The first vocal take, he went in to sing, did a take, I was looking down at the computer screen and was like, ‘On this line, can you sing it this way?’ And I looked over and he was mooning me. I was like, ‘I love this guy!’”
Take Me Home dropped November 9th, just nine days short of Up All Night’s first anniversary. With only seven weeks left in 2012, it became the fourth best-selling album of the year globally, moving 4.4 million copies, per the IFPI; it fell short of Adele’s 21, Taylor Swift’s Red and 1D’s own Up All Night, which had several extra months to sell 4.5 million copies.
Kotecha, Falk and Yacoub’s tracks anchored the album. Songs like “Kiss You,” “Heart Attack” and “Live While We’re Young” were pristine pop rock that One Direction delivered with full delirium, vulnerability and possibility — the essence of the teen — in voices increasingly capable of navigating all the little nuances of that spectrum. And the songs 1D helped write (“Last First Kiss,” “Back for You” and “Summer Love”) remain among the LP’s best.
“You saw that they caught the bug and were really good at it,” Kotecha says of their songwriting. “And moving forward, you got the impression that that was the way for them.”
Like clockwork, the wheels began to churn for album three right after Take Me Home dropped. But unlike those first two records, carving out dedicated studio time for LP3 was going to be difficult — on February 23rd, 2013, One Direction would launch a world tour in London, the first of 123 concerts they’d play that year. They’d have to write and record on the road, and for Kotecha and Falk — both of whom had just had kids — that just wasn’t possible.
But it was also time for a creative shift. Even Kotecha knew that from his boy band history: album three is, after all, when you start moving on. One Direction was ready, too. Kotecha credits Louis, the oldest member of the group, for “shepherding them into adulthood, away from the very pop-y stuff of the first two albums. He was leading the charge to make sure that they had a more mature sound. And at the time, being in it, it was a little difficult for me, Rami and Carl to grasp — but hindsight, that was the right thing to do.”
“For three years, this was our schedule,” Bunetta says. “We did X Factor October, November, December. Took off January. February, flew to London. We’d gather ideas with the band, come up with sounds, hang out. Then back to L.A. for March, produce some stuff, then go out on the road with them in April. Get vocals, write a song or two, come back for May, work on the vocals, and produce the songs we wrote on the road. Back to London in June-ish. Back here for July, produce it up. Go back on tour in August, get last bits of vocals, mix in September, back to X Factor in October, album out in November, January off, start it all over again.”
That cycle began in early 2013 when Bunetta and Ryan flew to London for a session that lasted just over a week, but yielded the bulk of Midnight Memories. With songwriters Jamie Scott, Wayne Hector and Ed Drewett they wrote “Best Song Ever” and “You and I,” and, with One Direction, “Diana” and “Midnight Memories.” Bunetta and Ryan’s initial rapport with the band strengthened — they were a few years older, but as Bunetta jokes, “We act like we’re 19 all the time anyway.” Years ago, Bunetta posted an audio clip documenting the creation of “Midnight Memories” — the place-holder chorus was a full-throated, perfectly harmonized, “I love KFC!”
For the most part, Bunetta, Ryan and 1D doubled down on the rock sound their predecessors had forged, but there was one outlier from that week. A stunning bit of post-Mumford festival folk buoyed by a new kind of lyrical and vocal maturity called “Story of My Life.”
“This was a make or break moment for them,” Bunetta says. “They needed to grow up, or they were gonna go away — and they wanted to grow up. To get to the level they got to, you need more than just your fan base. That song extended far beyond their fan base and made people really pay attention.”
Production on Midnight Memories continued on the road, where, like so many bands before them, One Direction unlocked a new dimension to their music. Tour engineer Alex Oriet made it possible, Ryan says, building makeshift vocal booths in hotel rooms by flipping beds up against the walls. Writing and recording was crammed in whenever — 20 minutes before a show, or right after another two-hour performance.
“It preserved the excitement of the moment,” Bunetta says. “We were just there, doing it, marinating in it at all times. You’re capturing moments instead of trying to recreate them. A lot of times we’d write a song, sing it in the hotel, produce it, then fly back out to have them re-sing it — and so many times the demo vocals were better. They hadn’t memorized it yet. They were still in the mood. There was a performance there that you couldn’t recreate.”
Midnight Memories arrived, per usual, in November 2013. And, per usual, it was a smash. The following year, 1D brought their songs to the environment they always deserved — stadiums around the world — and amid the biggest shows of their career, they worked on their aptly-titled fourth album Four. The 123 concerts 1D had played the year before had strengthened their combined vocal prowess in a way that opened up an array of new possibilities.
“We could use their voices on Four to make something sound more exciting and bigger, rather than having to add too many guitars, synths or drums,” Ryan says.
“They were so much more dynamic and subtle, too,” Bunetta adds. “I don’t think they could’ve pulled off a song like ‘Night Changes’ two albums prior; or the nuance to sing soft and emotionally on ‘Fireproof.’ It takes a lot of experience to deliver a restrained vocal that way.”
“A lot of the songs were double,” Bunetta says, “like somebody might be singing about their girlfriend, but there was another meaning that applied to the group as well.”
Musically, Four was 1D’s most expansive album yet — from the sky-high piano rock of “Steal My Girl” to the tender, tasteful groove of “Fireproof” — and it had the emotional range to match. Now in their early twenties, songs like “Where Do Broken Hearts Go,” “No Control,” “Fool’s Gold” and “Clouds” redrew the dramas and euphorias of adolescence with the new weight, wit and wanton winks of impending adulthood. One Direction wasn’t growing up normally in any sense of the word, but they were becoming songwriters capable of drawing out the most relatable elements from their extraordinary circumstances — like on “Change Your Ticket,” where the turbulent love affairs of young jet-setters are distilled to the universal pang of a long goodbye. There were real relationships inspiring these stories, but now that One Direction was four years into being the biggest band on the planet, it was natural that the relationships within the band would make it into the music as well.
“I think that on Four,” Bunetta says with a slight pause, “there were some tensions going on. A lot of the songs were double — like somebody might be singing about their girlfriend, but there was another meaning that applied to the group as well.”
He continues: “It’s tough going through that age, having to spread your wings with so many eyeballs on you, so much money and no break. It was tough for them to carve out their individual manhood, space and point of view, while learning how to communicate with each other. Even more than relationship things that were going on, that was the bigger blanket that was in there every day, seeping into the songs.”
Bunetta remembers Zayn playing him “Pillowtalk” and a few other songs for the first time through a three a.m. fog of cigarette smoke in a hotel room in Japan.
“Fucking amazing,” he says. “They were fucking awesome. I know creatively he wasn’t getting what he needed from the way that the albums were being made on the road. He wanted to lock himself in the studio and take his time, be methodical. And that just wasn’t possible.”
A month or so later, and 16 shows into One Direction’s “On the Road Again” tour, Zayn left the band. Bunetta and Ryan agree it wasn’t out of the blue: “He was frustrated and wanted to do things outside of the band,” Bunetta says. “It’s a lot for a young kid, all those shows. We’d been with them for a bunch of years at this point — it was a matter of when. You just hoped that it would wait until the last album.”
Still, Bunetta compares the loss to having a finger lopped off, and he acknowledges that Harry, Niall, Liam and Louis struggled to find their bearings as One Direction continued with their stadium tour and next album, Made in the A.M. Just as band tensions bubbled beneath the songs on Four, Zayn’s departure left an imprint on Made in the A.M. Not with any overt malice, but a song like “Drag Me Down,” Bunetta says, reflects the effort to bounce back. Even Niall pushing his voice to the limits of his range on that song wouldn’t have been necessary if Zayn and his trusty falsetto were available.
But Made in the A.M. wasn’t beholden to this shake-up. Bunetta and Ryan cite “Olivia” as a defining track, one that captures just how far One Direction had come as songwriters: They’d written it in 45 minutes, after wasting a whole day trying to write something far worse.
“When you start as a songwriter, you write a bunch of shitty songs, you get better and you keep getting better,” Ryan says. “But then you can get finicky and you’re like, ‘Maybe I have to get smart with this lyric.’ By Made in the A.M. … they were coming into their own in the sense of picking up a guitar, messing around and feeling something, rather than being like, ‘How do I put this puzzle together?’”
After Zayn’s departure, Bunetta and Ryan said it became clear that Made in the A.M. would be One Direction’s last album before some break of indeterminate length. The album boasts the palpable tug of the end, but to One Direction’s credit, that finality is balanced by a strong sense of forever. It’s literally the last sentiment they leave their fans on album-closer “History,” singing, “Baby don’t you know, baby don’t you know/We can live forever.”
In a way, Made in the A.M. is about One Direction as an entity. Not one that belonged to the group, but to everyone they spent five years making music for. Four years since their hiatus and 10 years since their formation, the fans remain One Direction’s defining legacy. Even as all five members have settled into solo careers, Ryan notes that baseless rumors of any kind of reunion — even a meager Zoom call — can still set the internet on fire. The old songs remain potent, too: Carl Falk says his nine-year-old son has taken to making TikToks to 1D tracks.
“Most of them weren’t necessarily musicians before this happened, but they loved music, and they found a love of creating, writing and playing,” Kotecha says
There are plenty of metrics to quantify One Direction’s reach, success and influence. The hard numbers — album sales and concert stubs — are staggering on their own, but the ineffable is always more fun. One Direction was such a good band that a fan, half-jokingly, but then kinda seriously, started a GoFundMe to buy out their contract and grant them full artistic freedom. One Direction was such a good band that songwriters like Kotecha and Falk — who would go on to make hits with Ariana Grande, the Weeknd and Nicki Minaj — still think about the songs they could’ve made with them. One Direction was such a good band that Mitski covered “Fireproof.”
But maybe it all comes down to the most ineffable thing of all: Chance. Kotecha compares success on talent shows like The X Factor to waking up one morning and being super cut — but now, to keep that figure, you have to work out at a 10, without having done the gradual work to reach that level. That’s the downfall for so many acts, but One Direction was not only able, but willing, to put in the work.
“They’re one of the only acts from those types of shows that managed to do it for such a long time,” Kotecha says. “Five years is a long time for a massive pop star to go nonstop. I know it was tiring, but they were fantastic sports about it. They appreciated and understood the opportunity they had — and, as you can see, they haven’t really stopped since. Most of them weren’t necessarily musicians before this happened, but they loved music, and they found a love of creating, writing and playing. To have these boys — that had been sort of randomly picked — to also have that? It will never be repeated.”
#rolling stone#ROLLING STONE SAID ROCK BAN SO ITS A ROCK B AND PERIDOT#220720#10years1d#one direction
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A bathroom figures significantly in the origin stories of at least two classic One Direction songs. The first will be familiar to any fan: Songwriter and producer Savan Kotecha was sitting on the toilet in a London hotel room, when he heard his wife say, “I feel so ugly today.” The words that popped into his head would shape the chorus of One Direction’s unforgettable 2011 debut, “What Makes You Beautiful.”
The second takes place a few years later. Another hotel room in England — this one in Manchester — where songwriters and producers Julian Bunetta and John Ryan were throwing back Cucumber Collins cocktails and tinkering with a beat. Liam Payne was there, too. At one point, Liam got up to use the bathroom and when he re-emerged, he was singing a melody. They taped it immediately. Most of it was mumbled — a temporary placeholder — but there was one phrase: “Better than words…” A few hours later, on the bus to another city, another show — Bunetta and Ryan can’t remember where — Payne asked, maybe having a laugh, what if the rest of the song was just lyrics from other songs?
“Songs in general, you’re just sort of waiting for an idea to bonk you on the head,” Ryan says from a Los Angeles studio with Bunetta. “And if you’re sort of winking at it, laughing at it — we were probably joking, what if [the next line was] ‘More than a feeling’? Well, that would actually be tight!”
“Better Than Words,” closed One Direction’s third album, Midnight Memories. It was never a single, but became a fan-favorite live show staple. It’s a mid-tempo headbanger that captures the essence of what One Direction is, and always was: One of the great rock and roll bands of the 21st century.
July 23rd marks One Direction’s 10th anniversary, the day Simon Cowell told Harry Styles, Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne and Louis Tomlinson that they would progress on The X Factor as a group. Between that date and their last live performance (so far, one can hope) on December 31st, 2015, they released five albums, toured the world four times — twice playing stadiums — and left a trove of Top 10 hits for a devoted global fan base that came to life at the moment social media was re-defining the contours of fandom.
It’d been a decade since the heyday of ‘N Sync and Backstreet Boys, and the churn of generations demanded a new boy band. One Direction’s songs were great and their charisma and chemistry undeniable, but what made them stick was a sound unlike anything else in pop — rooted in guitar rock at a time when that couldn’t have been more passé.
Kotecha, who met 1D on The X Factor and shepherded them through their first few years, is a devoted student of boy band history. He first witnessed their power back in the Eighties when New Kids on the Block helped his older sister through her teens. The common thread linking all great boy bands, from New Kids to BSB, he says, is, “When they’d break, they’d come out of nowhere, sounding like nothing that’s on the radio.”
In 2010, Kotecha remembers, “everybody was doing this sort of Rihanna dance pop.” But that just wasn’t a sound One Direction could pull off (the Wanted only did it once); and famously, they didn’t even dance. Instead, the reference points for 1D went all the way back to the source of contemporary boy bands.
“Me and Simon would talk about how [One Direction] was Beatles-esque, Monkees-esque,” Kotecha continues. “They had such big personalities. I felt like a kid again when I was around them. And I felt like the only music you could really do that with is fun, pop-y guitar songs. It would come out of left field and become something owned by the fans.”
“The guitar riff had to be so simple that my friend’s 15-year-old daughter could play it and put a cover to YouTube,” says Carl Falk
To craft that sound on 1D’s first two albums, Up All Night and Take Me Home, Kotecha worked mostly with Swedish songwriters-producers Carl Falk and Rami Yacoub. They’d all studied at the Max Martin/Cheiron Studios school of pop craftsmanship, and Falk says they were confident they could crack the boy band code once more with songs that recalled BSB and ‘N Sync, but replaced the dated synths and pianos with guitars.
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The greatest thing popular music can do is make someone else think, “I can do that,” and One Direction’s music was designed with that intent. “The guitar riff had to be so simple that my friend’s 15-year-old daughter could play it and put a cover to YouTube,” Falk says. “If you listen to ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ or ‘One Thing,’ they have two-finger guitar riffs that everyone who can play a bit of guitar can learn. That was all on purpose.”
One Direction famously finished third on The X Factor, but Cowell immediately signed them to his label, Syco Music. They’d gone through one round of artist development boot camp on the show, and another followed on an X Factor live tour in spring 2011. They’d developed an onstage confidence, but the studio presented a new challenge. “We had to create who should do what in One Direction,” Falk says. To solve the puzzle the band’s five voices presented, they chose the kitchen sink method and everyone tried everything.
“They were searching for themselves,” Falk adds. “It was like, Harry, let’s just record him; he’s not afraid of anything. Liam’s the perfect song starter, and then you put Zayn on top with this high falsetto. Louis found his voice when we did ‘Change Your Mind.’ It was a long trial for everyone to find their strengths and weaknesses, but that was also the fun part.” Falk also gave Niall some of his first real guitar lessons; there’s video of them performing “One Thing” together, still blessedly up on YouTube.
“What Makes You Beautiful” was released September 11th, 2011 in the U.K. and debuted at Number One on the singles chart there — though the video had dropped a month prior. While One Direction’s immediate success in the U.K. and other parts of Europe wasn’t guaranteed, the home field odds were favorable. European markets have historically been kinder to boy bands than the U.S.; ‘N Sync and Backstreet Boys found huge success abroad before they conquered home. To that end, neither Kotecha nor Falk were sure 1D would break in the U.S. Falk even says of conceiving the band’s sound, “We didn’t want it to sound too American, because this was not meant — for us, at least — to work in America. This was gonna work in the U.K. and maybe outside the U.K.”
Stoking anticipation for “What Makes You Beautiful” by releasing the video on YouTube before the single dropped, preceded the strategy Columbia Records (the band’s U.S. label) adopted for Up All Night. Between its November 2011 arrival in the U.K. and its U.S. release in March 2012, Columbia eschewed traditional radio strategies and built hype on social media. One Direction had been extremely online since their X Factor days, engaging with fans and spending their downtime making silly videos to share. One goofy tune, made with Kotecha, called “Vas Happenin’ Boys?” was an early viral hit.
“They instinctively had this — and it might just be a generational thing — they just knew how to speak to their fans,” Kotecha says. “And they did that by being themselves. That was a unique thing about these boys: When the cameras turned on, they didn’t change who they were.”
Social media was flooded with One Direction contests and petitions to bring the band to fans’ towns. Radio stations were inundated with calls to play “What Makes You Beautiful” long before it was even available. When it did finally arrive, Kotecha (who was in Sweden at the time) remembers staying up all night to watch it climb the iTunes chart with each refresh.
Take Me Home, was recorded primarily in Stockholm and London during and after their first world tour. The success of Up All Night had attracted an array of top songwriting talent — Ed Sheeran even penned two hopeless romantic sad lad tunes, “Little Things” and “Over Again” — but Kotecha, Falk and Yacoub grabbed the reins, collaborating on six of the album’s 13 tracks. In charting their course, Kotecha returned to his boy band history: “My theory was, you give them a similar sound on album two, and album three is when you start moving on.”
Still, there was the inherent pressure of the second album to contend with. The label wanted a “What Makes You Beautiful, Part 2,” and evidence that the 1D phenomenon wasn’t slowing down appeared outside the window of the Stockholm studio: so many fans, the street had to be shut down. Kotecha even remembers seeing police officers with missing person photos, combing through the girls camped outside, looking for teens to return to their parents.
At this pivotal moment, One Direction made it clear that they wanted a greater say in their artistic future. Kotecha admits he was wary at first, but the band was determined. To help manage the workload, Kotecha had brought in two young songwriters, Kristoffer Fogelmark and Albin Nedler, who’d arrived with a handful of ideas, including a chorus for a booming power ballad called “Last First Kiss.”
“We thought, while we’re busy recording vocals, whoever’s not busy can go write songs with these two guys, and then we’ll help shape them as much as we can,” Kotecha says. “And to our pleasant surprise, the songs were pretty damn good.”
At this pivotal moment, too, songwriters Julian Bunetta and John Ryan also met the band. Friends from the Berklee College of Music, Bunetta and Ryan had moved out to L.A. and cut a few tracks, but still had no hits to their name. They entered the Syco orbit after scoring work on the U.S. version of The X Factor, and were asked if they wanted to try writing a song for Take Me Home. “I was like, yeah definitely,” Bunetta says. “They sold five million albums? Hell yeah, I want to make some money.”
Working with Jamie Scott, who’d written two songs on Up All Night (“More Than This” and “Stole My Heart”), Bunetta and Ryan wrote “C’mon, C’mon” — a blinding hit of young love that rips down a dance pop speedway through a comically oversized wall of Marshall stacks. It earned them a trip to London. Bunetta admits to thinking the whole 1D thing was “a quick little fad” ahead of their first meeting with the band, but their charms were overwhelming. Everyone hit it off immediately.
“Niall showed me his ass,” Bunetta remembers of the day they recorded, “They Don’t Know About Us,” one of five songs they produced for Take Me Home (two are on the deluxe edition). “The first vocal take, he went in to sing, did a take, I was looking down at the computer screen and was like, ‘On this line, can you sing it this way?’ And I looked over and he was mooning me. I was like, ‘I love this guy!’”
Take Me Home dropped November 9th, just nine days short of Up All Night’s first anniversary. With only seven weeks left in 2012, it became the fourth best-selling album of the year globally, moving 4.4 million copies, per the IFPI; it fell short of Adele’s 21, Taylor Swift’s Red and 1D’s own Up All Night, which had several extra months to sell 4.5 million copies.
Kotecha, Falk and Yacoub’s tracks anchored the album. Songs like “Kiss You,” “Heart Attack” and “Live While We’re Young” were pristine pop rock that One Direction delivered with full delirium, vulnerability and possibility — the essence of the teen — in voices increasingly capable of navigating all the little nuances of that spectrum. And the songs 1D helped write (“Last First Kiss,” “Back for You” and “Summer Love”) remain among the LP’s best.
“You saw that they caught the bug and were really good at it,” Kotecha says of their songwriting. “And moving forward, you got the impression that that was the way for them.”
Like clockwork, the wheels began to churn for album three right after Take Me Home dropped. But unlike those first two records, carving out dedicated studio time for LP3 was going to be difficult — on February 23rd, 2013, One Direction would launch a world tour in London, the first of 123 concerts they’d play that year. They’d have to write and record on the road, and for Kotecha and Falk — both of whom had just had kids — that just wasn’t possible.
But it was also time for a creative shift. Even Kotecha knew that from his boy band history: album three is, after all, when you start moving on. One Direction was ready, too. Kotecha credits Louis, the oldest member of the group, for “shepherding them into adulthood, away from the very pop-y stuff of the first two albums. He was leading the charge to make sure that they had a more mature sound. And at the time, being in it, it was a little difficult for me, Rami and Carl to grasp — but hindsight, that was the right thing to do.”
“For three years, this was our schedule,” Bunetta says. “We did X Factor October, November, December. Took off January. February, flew to London. We’d gather ideas with the band, come up with sounds, hang out. Then back to L.A. for March, produce some stuff, then go out on the road with them in April. Get vocals, write a song or two, come back for May, work on the vocals, and produce the songs we wrote on the road. Back to London in June-ish. Back here for July, produce it up. Go back on tour in August, get last bits of vocals, mix in September, back to X Factor in October, album out in November, January off, start it all over again.”
That cycle began in early 2013 when Bunetta and Ryan flew to London for a session that lasted just over a week, but yielded the bulk of Midnight Memories. With songwriters Jamie Scott, Wayne Hector and Ed Drewett they wrote “Best Song Ever” and “You and I,” and, with One Direction, “Diana” and “Midnight Memories.” Bunetta and Ryan’s initial rapport with the band strengthened — they were a few years older, but as Bunetta jokes, “We act like we’re 19 all the time anyway.” Years ago, Bunetta posted an audio clip documenting the creation of “Midnight Memories” — the place-holder chorus was a full-throated, perfectly harmonized, “I love KFC!”
For the most part, Bunetta, Ryan and 1D doubled down on the rock sound their predecessors had forged, but there was one outlier from that week. A stunning bit of post-Mumford festival folk buoyed by a new kind of lyrical and vocal maturity called “Story of My Life.”
“This was a make or break moment for them,” Bunetta says. “They needed to grow up, or they were gonna go away — and they wanted to grow up. To get to the level they got to, you need more than just your fan base. That song extended far beyond their fan base and made people really pay attention.”
Production on Midnight Memories continued on the road, where, like so many bands before them, One Direction unlocked a new dimension to their music. Tour engineer Alex Oriet made it possible, Ryan says, building makeshift vocal booths in hotel rooms by flipping beds up against the walls. Writing and recording was crammed in whenever — 20 minutes before a show, or right after another two-hour performance.
“It preserved the excitement of the moment,” Bunetta says. “We were just there, doing it, marinating in it at all times. You’re capturing moments instead of trying to recreate them. A lot of times we’d write a song, sing it in the hotel, produce it, then fly back out to have them re-sing it — and so many times the demo vocals were better. They hadn’t memorized it yet. They were still in the mood. There was a performance there that you couldn’t recreate.”
Midnight Memories arrived, per usual, in November 2013. And, per usual, it was a smash. The following year, 1D brought their songs to the environment they always deserved — stadiums around the world — and amid the biggest shows of their career, they worked on their aptly-titled fourth album Four. The 123 concerts 1D had played the year before had strengthened their combined vocal prowess in a way that opened up an array of new possibilities.
“We could use their voices on Four to make something sound more exciting and bigger, rather than having to add too many guitars, synths or drums,” Ryan says.
“They were so much more dynamic and subtle, too,” Bunetta adds. “I don’t think they could’ve pulled off a song like ‘Night Changes’ two albums prior; or the nuance to sing soft and emotionally on ‘Fireproof.’ It takes a lot of experience to deliver a restrained vocal that way.”
“A lot of the songs were double,” Bunetta says, “like somebody might be singing about their girlfriend, but there was another meaning that applied to the group as well.”
Musically, Four was 1D’s most expansive album yet — from the sky-high piano rock of “Steal My Girl” to the tender, tasteful groove of “Fireproof” — and it had the emotional range to match. Now in their early twenties, songs like “Where Do Broken Hearts Go,” “No Control,” “Fool’s Gold” and “Clouds” redrew the dramas and euphorias of adolescence with the new weight, wit and wanton winks of impending adulthood. One Direction wasn’t growing up normally in any sense of the word, but they were becoming songwriters capable of drawing out the most relatable elements from their extraordinary circumstances — like on “Change Your Ticket,” where the turbulent love affairs of young jet-setters are distilled to the universal pang of a long goodbye. There were real relationships inspiring these stories, but now that One Direction was four years into being the biggest band on the planet, it was natural that the relationships within the band would make it into the music as well.
“I think that on Four,” Bunetta says with a slight pause, “there were some tensions going on. A lot of the songs were double — like somebody might be singing about their girlfriend, but there was another meaning that applied to the group as well.”
He continues: “It’s tough going through that age, having to spread your wings with so many eyeballs on you, so much money and no break. It was tough for them to carve out their individual manhood, space and point of view, while learning how to communicate with each other. Even more than relationship things that were going on, that was the bigger blanket that was in there every day, seeping into the songs.”
Bunetta remembers Zayn playing him “Pillowtalk” and a few other songs for the first time through a three a.m. fog of cigarette smoke in a hotel room in Japan.
“Fucking amazing,” he says. “They were fucking awesome. I know creatively he wasn’t getting what he needed from the way that the albums were being made on the road. He wanted to lock himself in the studio and take his time, be methodical. And that just wasn’t possible.”
A month or so later, and 16 shows into One Direction’s “On the Road Again” tour, Zayn left the band. Bunetta and Ryan agree it wasn’t out of the blue: “He was frustrated and wanted to do things outside of the band,” Bunetta says. “It’s a lot for a young kid, all those shows. We’d been with them for a bunch of years at this point — it was a matter of when. You just hoped that it would wait until the last album.”
Still, Bunetta compares the loss to having a finger lopped off, and he acknowledges that Harry, Niall, Liam and Louis struggled to find their bearings as One Direction continued with their stadium tour and next album, Made in the A.M. Just as band tensions bubbled beneath the songs on Four, Zayn’s departure left an imprint on Made in the A.M. Not with any overt malice, but a song like “Drag Me Down,” Bunetta says, reflects the effort to bounce back. Even Niall pushing his voice to the limits of his range on that song wouldn’t have been necessary if Zayn and his trusty falsetto were available.
But Made in the A.M. wasn’t beholden to this shake-up. Bunetta and Ryan cite “Olivia” as a defining track, one that captures just how far One Direction had come as songwriters: They’d written it in 45 minutes, after wasting a whole day trying to write something far worse.
“When you start as a songwriter, you write a bunch of shitty songs, you get better and you keep getting better,” Ryan says. “But then you can get finicky and you’re like, ‘Maybe I have to get smart with this lyric.’ By Made in the A.M. … they were coming into their own in the sense of picking up a guitar, messing around and feeling something, rather than being like, ‘How do I put this puzzle together?’”
After Zayn’s departure, Bunetta and Ryan said it became clear that Made in the A.M. would be One Direction’s last album before some break of indeterminate length. The album boasts the palpable tug of the end, but to One Direction’s credit, that finality is balanced by a strong sense of forever. It’s literally the last sentiment they leave their fans on album-closer “History,” singing, “Baby don’t you know, baby don’t you know/We can live forever.”
In a way, Made in the A.M. is about One Direction as an entity. Not one that belonged to the group, but to everyone they spent five years making music for. Four years since their hiatus and 10 years since their formation, the fans remain One Direction’s defining legacy. Even as all five members have settled into solo careers, Ryan notes that baseless rumors of any kind of reunion — even a meager Zoom call — can still set the internet on fire. The old songs remain potent, too: Carl Falk says his nine-year-old son has taken to making TikToks to 1D tracks.
“Most of them weren’t necessarily musicians before this happened, but they loved music, and they found a love of creating, writing and playing,” Kotecha says
There are plenty of metrics to quantify One Direction’s reach, success and influence. The hard numbers — album sales and concert stubs — are staggering on their own, but the ineffable is always more fun. One Direction was such a good band that a fan, half-jokingly, but then kinda seriously, started a GoFundMe to buy out their contract and grant them full artistic freedom. One Direction was such a good band that songwriters like Kotecha and Falk — who would go on to make hits with Ariana Grande, the Weeknd and Nicki Minaj — still think about the songs they could’ve made with them. One Direction was such a good band that Mitski covered “Fireproof.”
But maybe it all comes down to the most ineffable thing of all: Chance. Kotecha compares success on talent shows like The X Factor to waking up one morning and being super cut — but now, to keep that figure, you have to work out at a 10, without having done the gradual work to reach that level. That’s the downfall for so many acts, but One Direction was not only able, but willing, to put in the work.
“They’re one of the only acts from those types of shows that managed to do it for such a long time,” Kotecha says. “Five years is a long time for a massive pop star to go nonstop. I know it was tiring, but they were fantastic sports about it. They appreciated and understood the opportunity they had — and, as you can see, they haven’t really stopped since. Most of them weren’t necessarily musicians before this happened, but they loved music, and they found a love of creating, writing and playing. To have these boys — that had been sort of randomly picked — to also have that? It will never be repeated.”
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Bkdk Fic Rec
I’ve been inspired to write a fic rec! This one goes out to you @lonely-rabbit
At like, the end of 2018 and the beginning of 2019 I stayed up until 4am every night reading fics, and because I’m such a loser, I made a word doc to keep track of all of them so I wouldn’t forget them.... I tried organizing it by length but it got messy cause I’m ridiculous and cluttered, so sorry! (I’ll save my own for the end alskdjflsdkfj gotta self promote you know). This is going to get...really long, so I’ll put it under a read more! Also, just a heads up, these are all on ao3, in case that’s important to anyone!
Disclaimer: Any fics with mature or explicit content I will add a bolded warning for, even if it’s only a little bit. Normally most fics will be tagged as such, but some fics that are rated as teen I’ve found to be more suggestive than some of those rated as mature, so I will try to point it out where it feels necessary, for anyone who wishes to avoid it.
Fics under 1k:
Illuminate by TheQueen (269 words)
Summary: Bakugou watches the first firework launch and fights to keep his face neutral
Very short, plot is about a case of amnesia, also very cute and well written for that length! Not angsty at all imo
sweaty hands holding secrets - shounentwink (563 words)
Summary: Someone said Midoriya holds secrets in his hair.
It’s not true: He holds it tightly in his hands. Bakugou’s seen it.
I really like this writer! You’ll see quite a bit of them in this post alkdsjfalskdjf
Fics 1k - 10k:
Many sunflowers later - Jeka (2395 words)
Summary: Scholar Midoriya Izuku comes back to the person he left behind after his journey through the kingdom, the mighty dragon clan leader Bakugou Katsuki.
Day 1 of Twin Stars Week 2020: Fantasy AU.
First of all, fantasy au!!! Second of all, jeka!!! (I need to read more of your stuff!!) Anyways, so cute, such lovely, pretty writing, wonderful story telling, and they’re so in love TT_TT
Boom Badoom Boom - warschach (3429 words)
Summary: Izuku's working the kissing booth at the school fair, it just so happens Katsuki has been crushing on him since the first grade.
“Did you—“ Izuku parted his mouth with no sound leaving it, “Did you pay?”
“Yea.”
“For a kiss?”
This one’s a little silly but I love it still. It’s got a “kids in the 80′s over summer vacation” vibe, I think. I love warschach! I should read more of their writing... They have SUCH good bakudeku content! *It’s rated teen but there’s some suggestive content, just a heads up!
Hopeless Ramen-tic - lalazee (7155 words)
Summary: Midoriya is a cute guy who works at a ramen stall and Bakugou is thirsty as hell, but has to hide it by being an asshat. Another love story.
Ah, so good TT_TT so much sass, such good plot development and story telling for a simple concept *It’s rated as teen but again, it can be suggestive at times!
I’ll share this with you, so leave it behind - yabakuboi (3508 words)
Suammry: For the sake of the story, All Might is never in need of a successor, and, when Izuku saves Katsuki from the sludge monster, encourages young Midoriya down a different path. Thus, Katsuki and Izuku part ways after junior high, as Katsuki enters U.A. and the Midoriyas move overseas. It’s later that Katsuki realizes that there’s something missing, that he drove that something away.
Years after, Katsuki finds him in the last place he looks, in the cereal aisle at the local grocery store of their childhood neighborhood.
So soft, so sweet, so good if you just want to curl up in a comfy blanket and drink hot cocoa and feel warm and cozy and a little in love
The Secret Deku Box - yabakuboi (2241 words)
Summary: “Y’know, Bakugou never, ever talks about girls,” Kaminari says, his voice thoughtful.
“And I wonder why that is.” Ashido rolls her eyes.
“I’m just curious!” Kaminari whines. Kirishima drags the box out, unlabeled and unassuming, the lid not even fully clasped over the edges. “The guy has to— Whoa, what’s that?”
Kirishima realizes a little belatedly that this is a serious breach of privacy, and Bakugou will actually murder all of them. “Nothing!” he cries, attempting to shove it back under the bed, but Ashido snatches it away.
“Please be his porn stash!” Kaminari whispers as she whips the lid off.
Cute, funny, in canon, in character, and a must read I would say!
daisy bunches and heather branches - halcyonwhispers (5862 words)
Summary: izuku falls in love with the foul-mouthed tattoo artist next door.
Not another flower/tattoo shop au.... aldskjflaskdjfd Okay but punk!Bakugou is ALWAYS a smart move imo
the best part of me (is the worst I can give) - halcyonwhispers (5668)
Summary: Whole sentences usually make up people’s Words, but Katsuki got stuck with a name instead.
Izuku’s name.
I am such a sucker for soulmate aus when it comes to these boys TT_TT *There is some mature content, just a heads up!
Hard to Say - halcyonwhispers (8390 words)
Summary: Izuku is a Halfling, born after his faerie father spirited away his mom and then left her behind. Never quite fitting in with the humans or any of the supernatural beings in his small town, Izuku hoped that going to a diverse college in the big city will help him finally make friends.
Katsuki’s family has been powerful witches for generations, and he’s no different. Talented and a proclaimed genius to boot, he knew he shouldn’t waste his time on this dumbass (disgustingly cute) half-blood.
Or,
two idiots fall in love and don’t get that the other’s awkward cues are just a result of romantic tension.
I am ALSO a sucker for fantasy/mythical creatures au and I LOVED this one - Bakugou absolutely unable to handle how cute Midoriya is? Perfection - but it’s unfinished, and I don’t think it ever will be continued, unfortunately TT_TT
lots to unpack (throw away the whole suitcase) - shounentwink (4315 words)
Summary: “How’d you know?” Midoriya asks.
There’s a hunch to his shoulders that wasn’t there three hours ago. Freckled shoulders are kissed sunburnt and red: he looks like someone ran him over and left him like roadkill in the sunlight. Bakugou’s working with insurance today, but he could see the sparks of green lightning even from his elevated position in their shared agency. Midoriya’s holding his thumb, cracking it over and over — it looks like he’s rubbed it raw.
“Dunno,” Bakugou says. “Maybe you’re just easy to read, nerd.”
I love this one so much, it was one of the first ones I read, it’s so good, and it’s another that really affected how I view their relationship! Idk this one just hit for me
hang the moon from us (it’s a no from me) - shounentwink (1200 words)
Summary: Midoriya’s gonna get sick of Bakugou one of these days, and then the whole ruse will be over, and the balance of power will tilt beyond salvation, but that day isn’t today and it looks like Bakugou knows it.
What an asshole.
Once again, I’m a sucker for the fantasy au... But even more, the diction, the details, the imagery...it’s absolutely all stunning here. I wish I could write this pretty
In Which Bakugou Finds His One Tru Luv - Erina (5862 words) This is the first one of a series called The Misadventures of Explodo-kill Agency!
Summary: Welcome to the Explodo-kill agency! We can destroy your buildings, crash your cars, and help you solve one of the seven mysteries in life: who is Bakugou Katsuki's mysterious boyfriend?!
I’ll admit I’ve only read the first three but by god they are the funniest fics I’ve ever read in my life. I see that Erina has added more since the last time I checked it out! Tbh I was only interested in reading the purely bakudeku ones... (My favorite was the second one!! SO funny and cute!)
i still do - raeryn (9646 words)
Summary: He’s losing him to pieces, but Izuku still tries to make them count. In which a battle leaves Bakugou Katsuki with amnesia, and Izuku finds himself picking up the pieces.
So, this one makes me cry. TT_TT
One Thing Straight - winningshot (9899 words)
Summary: They totally aren't.
Hints of their relationship is found in all of their friends’ social media accounts, but majority of their fans still think that Katsuki and Izuku are in relationships with anybody but each other.
It was amusing up until it became sad.
Lmao it’s a little salty but I guess I can be too. This is a social media fic! There’s multiple ships in this one, too
A Demolition Boy & his Cryptid BF - kewltie (8472 words)
Summary: Bakugou of the Demolition Squad is famous for running one of the most popular Youtube channels on the web that regularly blow shit up and jumped off a perfectly good building for shit and giggles. He's also famous for his Cryptid BF™, never appearing on camera except for a few bodyshots and all information on him is kept locked up tighter than Fort Knox, therefore drawing all sort of attention and curiosity toward his mysterious boyfriend.
Deku from Deku Explains is a hopeless chatterbox who is known for uploading 20-30 minutes video that talked about his favorite shows and comics and have one of the most devoted following on Youtube. He also can't seem to shut up about his boyfriend Kacchan, who regularly make his presence on the channel as a disembodied voice.
They should theoretically have nothing in common except a shared platform to host their content and an army of fans with an endless curiosity and devotion to their Youtubers. Vidcon is where we lay our scene and the internet is about to get a rude wake up call.
Okay kewltie is SO GOOD and very creative! The formatting is phenomenal, it’s like you’re actually experiencing a social media melt down in real time lol
be my good luck charm - writedeku (6785 words)
Summary: See, the thing is, Midoriya Izuku had been born with a curse. It’s not a curse that’s particularly visible. He doesn’t have horns, or a tortured face, and it’s not the kind of silly curse like a friend of his had way down south in Diagnor, wherein the girl had been born without the ability to say the word duck. Midoriya Izuku is just extremely unlucky.
(Or the AU in which Izuku's the world's unluckiest travelling merchant, and Katsuki is someone who may be able to help him. For a price, that is.)
Oh I adore this one! It’s so cute and such a good narrative! Nice and warm, and Bakugou trying his damnedest to be suave, and it somehow working because Midoriya is just as flustered. *Another one rated as teen but some suggestive content.
Smells Like Victory - majjale (2377 words)
Summary: Bakugou takes two steps into the room and stops, clapping a hand over his nose. “Ugh, what stinks like Deku in here?”
"Good afternoon, Bakugou. That would be the amortentia."
I must admit, not a fan of HP, but majjale...TT_TT majjale writes these two boys so well. This one is really, really good!
Cherish Me - Justaperson1718 (2376 words)
Summary: “What?”
Izuku looked back down at his menu and flipped the page, a small smile on his face. “Nothing.”
Katsuki glared at Izuku from across the table. “If it was nothing then you wouldn’t be staring at me.”
“It’s just a little funny watching you try to look your best for our date when you always look great anyway,” Izuku explained. He wouldn’t look up from his menu while he spoke, but his words remained ingrained with confidence nevertheless. He considered what he was saying to be fact, and nothing else. “Even when you’re not trying in front of the cameras, it’s still hard to take my eyes off of you.”
This is a sequel to a fic that’ll be in the next section, because it’s longer, called Manage Me. Please read that one first before this one! (Not part of a series, but they’re the same story line)
Fascinating - Justaperson1718 (1556 words)
Summary: “I’m not staring at you,” Izuku replied, his eyes focused intently on Katsuki. He’s still wearing his pajamas, sitting on his knees in their shared bed. He was awake moments before Katsuki, and waited eagerly for the other to awake.
Katsuki glanced over his shoulder after his shirt was on and glared. “You’re fucking staring at me right now.”
Izuku shook his head, humming his disapproval quietly. “I’m watching you.”
“That’s the same damn thing,” Katsuki said while searching for a pair of pants in the dresser. “Your eyes are fixated on me like I’m your life’s fucking goal or some shit.”
“I just like watching you get dressed.” Izuku tilted his head to the side and smiled softly at Katsuki’s confused stare. “I know, it’s weird. But I like it.”
*There is a little bit of implied mature content, but overall, it’s just so sweet and intimate, and I just simply adore this one.
in a place once filled with gold - dorenamryn (9226 words)
Summary: It felt strange to remember such details, for they were things a friend should know, and as far as Katsuki was concerned, he and Deku hadn’t been friends in a very, very long time. He could admit, with reluctance, that they were on the path there, now, even though they would never make it. Katsuki would die before they could get the chance.
or: There is a garden growing in Katsuki’s lungs, and he is helpless to stop it.
“Hanahaki disease” okay, I can explain myself. Okay, I can’t. In any case, you got angst with a happy ending if that’s what you’re into!
Kaleidoscope - DPRenFTW (5141 words)
Summary: Izuku is a witch. He just needs to find his familiar. Enter a boy that is a wolf, and a wolf that is a boy - with wild red eyes and sharp smiles.
And Izuku thinks:
"Oh, it's him."
Just as beautiful and fascinating as the name implies! I seriously recommend for the beautiful writing, the gorgeous world, the mythical creatures au, and the lovely bakudeku romance!
Learning Curve - sensiblysilly (4222 words)
Summary: Deku and Katsuki’s first kiss goes rather differently than planned.
And Katsuki’s quickly learning that relationships can be unpredictable - especially when taking into account the variable that is Midoriya Izuku.
This really is just a careful handling of a teenage romance where perhaps one of them may have shit they’re still working through. It’s really sweet, and a careful study at boundaries and the building of a relationship. I actually stumbled across this while looking for another with the same name and ended up pleasantly surprised. Kacchan can has a little validation, as a treat.
4/20 is a national holiday - Ereri_Garbage (
Summary: Izuku is a drug dealer that doesn't really accept the fact he's a drug dealer, Katsuki is hot as hell as shouldn't be allowed a facebook.
Happy (Late) birthday Katsuki and happy (late) 4/20. I actually half assed an edit on this one so it took longer to post than I thought it would.
Uummmm lmao yes I have a sense of humor. ;ALDSKJFLSKDJF Okay, I say that, but this is not a crack fic, it’s a good story that I enjoy with good writing, and *it has mature, content, obviously for multiple reasons here. It’s rated as mature but there are borderline explicit moments imo. It’s a fun fic and funny, too! And, ngl, it really does remind me of college... But forget about me, the bakudeku is wonderful too of course :)
Drinking Watermelon - warschach (8906 words)
Summary: For whatever reason, maybe divine fate, Izuku turned and looked over his shoulder and waved to them.
Katsuki’s heart full on stopped right then, and his fingers forgot their duty on the rails, and his body neglected its job to keep Katsuki balanced.
Izuku’s summer sweet smile fell into concern as Katsuki went airborne and cracked his skull on the porch.
or Katsuki works as a camp counselor, and Izuku is a boy made of summer heat and sunlight.
Love it when people have Bakugou as absolutely enamored with Midoriya; it’s so good and true. Anyways this one makes me like summer camp story lines. It’s funny and also cute and great writing! *It’s got explicit content, just a heads up. Warschach stories just have this youthful 80′s vibe, I don’t know how else to explain it.
there are listed buildings - semiautomatichearts (3309)
Summary: Katsuki first sees colors bloom when he is only three years old. It is timid Izuku, hiding behind the cover of his mother's leg who looks upon him with wide eyes, and Katsuki's world explodes in shades of greens and pinks and blues, and he is so startled, he begins to cry.
His life is then on defined in color, in shades his peers can't see, by the forlorn, timid stare in Izuku's eyes that always lets off more than he is willing to tell. There is a schism driven between himself and his fated other, and Katsuki strives to be better than fate, better than what is defined for him. He is more than the written pages of a book, to be cracked open and read by the gods.
He wonders if it is possible for colors to bloom for someone who will never love you back.
Ah...soulmates :) So interesting how bakudeku fits into soulmate aus like this one when they’ve known each other as kids! And when they’ve had this complex push and pull thing going on all their lives! The writing is beautiful, and so is the story!
Promise Ring - bkdkwritingsdump (3579)
Summary: The midwest in the 1950′s is no place for boys who like kissing boys: something Izuku and Katsuki know all too well growing up there. However, the undeniable bond between the nervous science geek and the aloof delinquent will still find a way to blossom in such a desert.
Cute, sweet, makes my gay heart ache. Longing not just for the one you love, but just to feel right loving them. Very pretty story line, lovely story telling!
Fics 10k - 30k:
Fishy - warschach (19417 words)
Summary: Izuku’s convinced his hot co-worker/neighbor, Katsuki, is a mermaid-or merman- you gotta consider genders even with mythical creatures- and plans to prove it.
(or this is kinda like the show ‘Monster Quest’, except Izuku actually finds said monster, falls in love, and have sexy times.)
Another warschach! I love this one, I love how they write bakudeku, particularly as college students, their stories (at least, the ones that I’ve read) always feel so warm, like a summer’s day, but not a lazy one, one that’s playful? If that makes sense? *This one is explicit, another heads up!
Manage Me - Justaperson1718 (10756 words)
Summary: Izuku caught himself moving forward, his head tilted somewhat to the side, and his eyes shot wide open. His gaze met Katsuki’s half-lidded eyes now that he was no longer in a dreamlike state, and seeing the way Katsuki was looking at him—waiting for him—made him realize Katsuki would’ve let him do it. He might have even wanted him to do it.
“You’re both doing fabulous!” the photographer called out to them, packing his camera into his bag and getting ready to leave. “I just got word that what we have now should be good, so we’ll stop there. Thank you for your time! Lock the door on your way out after you change.”
The pair stayed frozen in place, with Izuku’s arms around Katsuki’s neck and Katsuki’s hands resting on Izuku’s waist, while the photographer and his supervisor left.
“Kacchan,” Izuku cooed once they were gone. “Did you want to…?”
Love the story, love the bakudeku! Very, very good bakudeku TT_TT very sweet *There is some mature content in here as well
point to a map (we’ve been there) - cosmicfuss (10589 words)
Summary: Serendipity / sĕr″ən-dĭp′ĭ-tē Serendipity is the occurrence of an unplanned fortunate discovery. Two men find themselves on a subway, hot coffee on one while the other is in the middle of a screaming match. After that they can't seem to stop finding each other, no matter how far they go.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; this fic owns my entire soul. I love the story, the ease of their relationship, just how lovely they are together. It’s another kind of nice, fluffy fic you’d read on a bad day where you come home and curl up in a blanket and listen to a ten hour video of thunderstorm white noise. *Again, some more mature content in here
Partners - tsukithewolf (13619 words) Another series! Two parts to this one this time
Summary: It is said that in Musutafu there is a charm that one can buy at a temple that will lead you to your destined partner. They say that if the charm works, you would be able to follow the red string of fate to the person you were meant to be with. And if the person returns your feelings, they would be able to see the string as well, proving that both were meant to be.
Three-year-old Katsuki and Izuku misunderstand what the word "partner" means and discover the charm and the rumor behind it is not only true, but more than expected.
Gets a little heavy, depression, bullying, suicidal thoughts, etc. But it must get worse before it gets better, that kind of thing. I also just adore the second part (called Bond) - maybe because it’s much fluffier, what about it?
Learning Curve - iknewaman (10304 words)
Summary: “Izuku.” Uraraka repeats as she motions at the person stood next to her. Green curls, average height, and, well. Up close, not such a bad smile. Uraraka points a thumb at Bakugou and enunciates slowly, “This is Bakugou. He can speak sign language too.”
Wait. Sign language?
The stranger— well, Izuku— looks at him with a raised brow. Their free hand lifts up as they make a slight motion of the hand.‘
Really?’
*
Bored out of his mind at a house party one night Bakugou is introduced to Izuku, a deaf student who offers to help teach Bakugou sign language in exchange for a favour-- or well, is prompted into asking for a favour.
Ah, I really want to explain this one a little bit? I’d never been into fanfiction ever, only really getting into it with these boys. This was the second one I read, I remember, and it caught me off guard, and it intrigued me. It really surprised me as to what fanfiction could be. Ngl I had biased perceptions of fanfics - I used to be one of those people who thought fanfiction could never be good writing - and this one slapped me in the face with it’s subtle beauty and creative story and heart melting capabilities, and very, very real relationship and growth. Anyways it’s so cute how happy Deku is to teach Kacchan sign language TT_TT Make sure to read the tags!
The Keeper and the Sun God’s Heir - SurelyHeavenWaits (12746 words)
Summary: The Titans' have stolen something important from Izuku, heir of the Sun God, and he wants it back.
This one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one this one- Oh my god this one. Okay so what, I was a Percy Jackson kid, what about it? I love the mythical aus, particularly the god ones. But beyond that, the writing is so beautiful, just like the world, and the imagery. The bakudeku...absolutely stunning. The story itself? Incredible. Cannot recommend more. *There is explicit content in this, though I will say, it’s all in the last chapter, and all of the story is in the first two chapters. There’s also a second part as it’s a series and it’s short but it’s cute and sweet TT_TT
seven days - aaAAAaaahhhhHHHHH (10094 words)
Summary: There’s something about the green haired boy, an aura that just drew Katsuki in before he even knew his name.
[Sometimes your mind forgets, but your heart remembers]
Heed my warning: DON’T read this in front of other people. I bawl every time I read this one TT_TT I know I said I don’t like angst but AJLSKDFJALSKDFJ it has a hopeful ending! I mean yeah you’re gonna cry but...hope? :’) (that username really says it all tbh)
Fics 30k+
Notice me, nerd - useless_donut (40000 words)
Summary: Bakugou is in love with Midoriya. He doesn’t hide it, in fact it’s so painfully obvious that the entire class of 3-A has him figured out in a matter of months (days, in some cases). Too bad Midoriya is the most oblivious motherfucker out there, and Bakugou is too damn stubborn to actually ask him out.
Will the class of 3-A survive the sexual tension? Who will snap first? Someone put Bakugou out of his misery, please, before everyone else dies of second-hand embarrassment.
(a love story as witnessed by the class of 3-A)
Love the idea of Bakugou being brazen and brash, cause yeah, he is. So fucking funny though how that translates to him flirting. Gotta say, thought I was gonna cringe, but his “I’m gay af” outfit really ended up being A Look. Love the mutual pining, it really is strong in this one. *Okay, mature content in this one lads.
While You Were Sleeping - Belkacaramelka (71197 words)
Summary: The one where quirkless fanboy Midoriya Izuku rescues Pro Hero Todoroki Shouto, gets mistaken as his fiancé while he is in a coma, and gets caught up in the most unlikely fake engagement... until his childhood enemy and Todoroki's classmate Bakugou Katsuki tries to catch him out, and they both end up discovering a lot more about each other than they'd expected.
Quirkless AU based on the film; endgame BakuDeku. -- Katsuki didn’t know when the change had happened: how he had gone from asking why Todoroki chose Deku of all people, to wondering why it was Todoroki that Deku chose. Troublesome Deku, who cooed like an idiot at cats, tripped at a random catcall and sang badly. Who, despite everything, proved that it wasn’t the quirk that defined a person. Deku, who was too much, not his, and undeniably off limits to begin with.
Update: Epilogue added
*This one has mature content. If you can, please, for the love of god, read this fic. It’s like, tied with my favorite bkdk fic perhaps ever. It’s based on the movie of the same title, a nineties romcom with Sandra Bullock, but Belkacaramelka has so effortlessly made it into it’s own story, fit it so perfectly inside of the bnha world. I definitely stayed up until 6:30am reading this one. It’s got such good badass Midoriya, who is also sweet, and really really good reconciliation between bakudeku.
All Gifted - fitzefitcher (39129 words)
Summary: The thing about gifts is that they're meant to be given, they're meant to be shared; so Izuku will take his gifts, so freely given to him, and share them with all he holds dear.
Izuku is born without any gifts, as his kind often are, to a witch mother and salamander father, on one sweltering night in July.
This one is unfinished...and I highly doubt it will ever be. But what has been written is incredible. Once again, I’m a sucker for the magic/mythical creatures aus. But the relationship is great! The characterization is great! The found family trope that was building up is great!
under a hollow sun - umbrage (40572 words)
Summary: Midoriya is cursed with emptiness.
Misfortune leads him to a man of ancient magic and endless rage.
To stop an unfathomable evil, their mismatched halves must become whole.
Uuuggghhhh this was so good! I don’t think it’s going to be finished either :( Once again, fantasy au, more amazing writing, on point characterization, incredible pacing, makes you hungry for more story.
all the savage soul requires - majjale (58032 words)
Summary: Bakugou seems to have exhausted his patience for words and no longer acknowledges that Midoriya exists, so Midoriya crosses his legs, stares down at his hands limned in firelight, and makes a list of things he knows.
One. His name is Midoriya Izuku.
Two. He is a Godmarked, future god of life, heir to the divine throne.
Three. The gods have been fighting Death for eons, and now he's coming for recompense with everything he’s got.
This is majjale, so of course, the writing is more than beautiful; it’s absolutely breathtaking. This may be my favorite fic ever - unfortunately I don’t think it will ever be finished either TT_TT There’s the gods/fantasy au, which you know by now I love. But the characterization of our two boys is absolutely perfect, and I mean that as literally as possible. And the story being crafted between the two, the memory loss, the obvious history muddled by it all, it was so dense, and the PINING, so incredibly written, flowing so naturally. It wasn’t even close to being done, but it was wonderful, still is wonderful.
My Writing: (You can skip this if you hate shameless self promotion)
You’re too damn flicking cute (1815 words)
Summary: Bakugou is certain his shitty boyfriend is instigating kisses. Maybe it doesn't help that he keeps giving them away like it's a damn going out of business sale, but the stupid nerd is too fucking cute. Either way, like everything else, this is a competition, and he's going to win it.
Please don’t read this unless you’re going to the dentist afterwards! I’ve been told it’s so sweet it’ll give you instant cavities >_>;;;;
Bakugou Katsuki, you smooth motherfucker (10118 words)
Summary: Everyone around him knows that Bakugou Katsuki has a very special way with words. To the untrained ear he is loud and crass; to those that speak Kacchan, he is caring and inspiring. Yet there are rare moments, moments so fleeting you blink and you miss them, where Bakugou’s words pierce straight through Midoriya’s chest, and surprise everyone around him.
Goddammit, if only he would say them to Midoriya’s face.
Or, the five times Bakugou said something nice about Midoriya, and the one time he said something kind to him (but that was too long of a title).
I think most would consider this my best published fic; it’s one of those snapshot fics, “the five times where x did this, and the one time where they didn’t.” The recurring comment I get on this one is both of them being super in character, so I think that’s it’s defining characteristic! Bakugou and Midoriya have never known a life without the other, and in a perfect world, they never will.
Here, let me fix that (11247 words)
Summary: Bakugou honestly never thought he’d see Deku ever again. And now that they were together in this tiny compartment, alone for the next two and a half minutes, he had no clue what to say. He’d just apologized, right? So perhaps he could leave it at that and carry on with the original plan to never see the green-haired man that reminded him of dense forests, late night adventures, and tear-stained faces, ever again.
Ha! Who is he kidding? These bitches are soulmates.
I’ve gotten some critiques on this one, so sorry in advance if it’s not to your liking! Basically, what if Midoriya never got his quirk? Obviously, life would find a way to put them together because, as previously stated, these bitches are soulmates.
Plenty of Time (16654 words)
Summary: Bakugou found what little sleep he got restless and filled with nightmares that he forgot the second he opened his eyes. Tonight was the first time in a long time where he just had a normal dream - and it happened to be about Deku.
How fucking typical.
In other words, two dorks realize they have feelings for each other but don't know what to do about said feelings.
Ah, my first fic. Very simple, boys being boys, kinda like a slow burn? Idk how to explain this one, just boys figuring out their feelings and trying to figure out what to do about them. Been told these two are a little stupid but I think that’s valid.
We’re all time bombs waiting to explode (39223 words)
Summary: We have now entered the slipstream of time, into an alternate dimension where it neither is, nor isn’t, the 80’s. Two teenagers, burdened with the weight of adolescence in the modern world, find themselves struggling side by side, in part because of each other.
Bakugou, the most popular boy in school, has everything he could possibly want; status, power, and an unbreakable will. Having been dragged along behind him all the way to the top, Midoriya can’t help but wonder how (and why) he ended up standing beside his childhood friend-turned bully-turned friend again, weighed down by their complicated past and present. As the tension between them grows every day, and the arrival of a new, pretty face causes it to peak, it won’t be long before something - or someone - snaps.
I am...very bad at titles, and summaries apparently. This was my Heathers au, but it very quickly diverges from the original (I don’t do sad endings....) *This one has mature content, including implied sexual activity, drug use, and underage drinking, along with other heavy topics; please read the tags! Though tbh Midoriya is 17 for a couple weeks before it hits his birthday halfway through, so keep that in mind I guess? I kind of went heavy with this one, but I think the pay off was immense. This is the one with the most amount of comments stating it’s their favorite bkdk fic ever (and I cry). It’s a rough start, with a rough journey, but so is bakudeku! There’s a lot of petty drama, and then all of a sudden it’s Not That Petty and very much Far Too Real. Many have cried reading the ending, I cried writing it. My sister says it’s her favorite of mine. Now, I did kind of push this out without polishing it so much because I was losing my willpower, so if it feels lacking, that’s one hundred percent my fault.
Okay that was a lot! It took me a couple days...I hope I wasn’t too annoying with all my opinions! Please have a nice day. and enjoy some good reads, even if they aren’t the ones in this post!
#bakudeku#katsudeku#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#mha#bnha#bkdk#fics#my writing#god i really hope i didn't fuck up any of this#i spent a long time on it alksdjflaskjdflkasdjf#this is 39 fics without my own#and 44 including mine#i can tell i've forgotten some but#idk it's hard TT_TT#anyways it's 2:30am#if i go to bed at 4am one more time i'm gonna throw myself down a flight of stairs#i hope this is good enough as is!#most of this was written very late so I hope it doesn't sound...crazed
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If I Could Tell Him [G.W.]
Pairing: George Weasley x Diggory!reader
PART ONE HERE
Summary: Based on the song If I Could Tell her from the musical Dear Evan Hansen; George has just lost his brotehr, and y/N tries to comfort him.
Musical Hogwarts || Hogwarts Masterlist
A/N: Here’s the second part! Hope you all like it, it’s a bit angst, but cute, I guess... well, enjoy it!
Words:2.000+
Tag List: @enjoying-fantasyland21 @stuckindilemma @boredoffmebox
Voldemort was finally gone, and this time, for good. It was time for celebration, but you weren’t much in the mood.
At your last year in Hogwarts, you started being closer to the Weasley family. At first, it was out of their pity, or at least, it was what you thought.
Fred Weasley used to talk to you during classes, and soon his twin started joining in. It was funny most of the time, and it made you forget about the recent loss of your brother Cedric Diggory.
Mrs and Mr Weasley then invited you all the time after graduation to stop by the Burrow, and you loved the place, so you always showed up.
It didn’t take long for you to realize you were catching feelings for George. He was kind to you, and every time you two talked, it was like he knew every word you were going to say before you even spoke.
Then, the war came. Although prepared, nobody could be expecting its effects.
Now, you faced one of its consequences.
Fred Weasley laid lifeless in front of you, laying as if asleep in a pampered coffin. You couldn’t stare for long, but you knew you had too. He had become a friend, and you would need closure.
George was in a corner, crying nonstop, although in silence. You could only imagine his pain. You had lost Cedric, and it hurt like hell, but you weren’t as close as Fred and George.
There was nothing you could say to him, so you avoided doing the same as the others. Hugging him and saying “I’m sorry” wasn’t a good thing to do. You knew it better than anyone.
So you walked away, and you avoided George and the rest of the Weasleys.
Sometimes you walked in front of their shop, expecting to see George there, but of course, he wasn’t ready. It was too soon.
Months passed when you finally saw the shop reopen. You didn’t even notice at first — it didn’t look as if the first time opening again, so it probably was open for a while.
The Diagon Alley wasn’t part of your way to work, but more times than you wanted to admit, you’d go to the Flourish and Blotts to get a new book.
That was one of those times. You stared at the open door, with your mouth gaped.
“Hey!” a voice called from inside. “Y/N?”
The red-haired boy that walked out of the shop was not one of the owners — but it was Ronald Weasley.
You smiled at him. He was a hero, but you were sure that with the loss of his brother, he wasn’t feeling so wonderful lately.
“Hi, Ron,” you said, walking in and side-hugging the boy.
Well, you should stop calling him ‘boy’. He was taller than you now — not that it need much to accomplish that.
“How are things?” urgh, wrong question!
“You know... slow,” he answered, with a sad smile.
“How’s Harry? And Hermione?” you asked, avoiding mentioning George.
“Harry’s working and loving it, may I add,” Ron was glad you didn’t ask about George because he had no idea what to answer. Hsi brother was there, working at the shop too, but he didn’t look the same anymore. “Hermione’s back at school. Couldn’t resist not finishing it.”
You giggled at the mention of Hermione. Of course, she’d be studying.
Silence fell between Ron and you. You two weren’t close; as stated before, you were starting to be close to the twins before the war got in the way.
Ron sighed. “George’s in the back,” he said, finally, bending his head towards the direction.
You pressed your lips together, gathering the courage to talk to your missed friend and walked towards the back of the shop.
George was sitting over a box, holding what it seemed to be a picture. He didn’t hear you walk it, distracted with the photograph. You leaned closer — it was him and Fred in front of the shop at its opening.
“You know, he thought you were awesome, ” you said with a sad smile, announcing you and referencing what he said to you when Cedric died.
For a second, you thought it was the wrong thing to say. George couldn’t possibly remember that.
But he looked over his shoulder, with a sad smile on his face.
“Hi, y/N.”
“Hi, George, ” you stepped inside the deposit, getting in front of George. “How are you holding?”
George sighed but did not answer. You knew it was stupid even to ask, but you had to say something.
“I miss him too,” you said, tilting your head towards the picture.
“I wish I could’ve done something, said something,” George finally opened up. “If I knew it was the last time I’d see him...”
“Don’t think like that — besides, I’m sure Fred would’ve wanted to say things to you as well.”
“Like what?” he asked, looking up from the picture and meeting your eyes.
“He’d say,” you gave him a sad smile in sympathy, “there’s nothing like your jokes — sort of subtle and funny and smart.”
George raised a brow at you. He couldn’t believe you were going to do that for him. He didn’t even think you remembered.
“He once even said you never knew how many laughs you could make someone laugh,” you couldn’t help but chuckle, thinking that, although Fred never mentioned those things to you, you knew he could’ve said it.
“And he knew that whenever you get bored,” you kept the conversation going, noticing that it was cheering George up, “you scribble someone doing something obscene.”
“I do not—” George tried to protest, but you cut him off.
”And he noticed that you do every chore he forgot to do himself,” that was something you remembered George did since Hogwarts. Probably was a habit of his since babies, but that you’d need to ask Molly.
“But he kept it all inside his head, what he saw he left unsaid,” you sighed, biting the inside of your cheek. “And though he wanted to, he couldn’t talk to you; he couldn’t find the way. But he would always say ‘If I could tell him everything I see’.”
George smiled. You were making him feel better, better like he had never felt since... well, since he lost Fred.
“‘But we’re a million worlds apart’—”
“‘And I don’t know how I would even start’,” George added, interrupting you. However, you weren’t mad. You couldn’t get mad at George.
He finally got up from the box, and you both walked out from the small deposit. He was still holding the picture, although he wasn’t staring at it as if his life depended on it anymore.
“You know, this is the picture you took,” George commented, getting behind the cashier counter. The store was surprisingly empty, but you figure it was because the new school year had already started.
“I know,” y/N beamed. “I’m an excellent photographer.”
You rested your elbows and the up part of your body on the counter, leaning towards George, with a silly smile on your face. For a moment, as he stared at you, it looked like he was going to scold you for leaning there; however, he said nothing about it.
“Do you remember anything else?”
You knew he was challenging you and it made you feel like it was the old days, back when the shop was new, and Fred was around.
“He thought you looked really, er—” you had to give extra thought on the adjective; it was not a good time to let Geroge know how you feel about him. “It looked pretty cool when you let your hair grow a bit more.”
“He did, huh?” George raised a brow, smirking. “Funny then he should have let his hair grow too. If I were cool, he’d be cool too. You know, identical.”
You widened your eyes and stopped blinking for a minute. George had caught you, but you decide to ignore it, so you continued your telling.
“He wondered how you learned to piss me off like no one else before,” you called, leaning out of the counter and crossing your arms.
“Piss you off or piss Fred off?” George smile in a way that made him remind you even more of Fred.
“Both. Pretty sure you pissed Fred off most of the time.”
George pretended to be offended, gaping his mouth and putting a hand over his heart. The truth was he was glad you were there for him. At first, George had wondered where you were. It had been months since he last saw you and he was worried he’d have to be the one to make the first touch. But then, there you were, and you were making him feel like in the old days.
“But,” you continued,“he kept it all inside his head; what he saw he left unsaid.”
“And now we’re a million worlds apart,” George sighed, turning his face at the cashier.
“I don’t know how I would even start,” you said, looking away too.
There was a moment of silence — you couldn’t decide if he was ignoring you or if he was just distracted with the cashier.
“You seem so far away,” y/N murmured, placing her forehead on the counter, a clear sign that she was desperate for George to be as he was before.
It was funny to look back now — to the years you had spent ignoring the Weasleys because they were from a different house than yours. It even seemed stupid.
“What?” George asked, and y/N looked up, shrugging. “It’s like I don’t know anything,” George confided, looking back at the cashier.
He seemed to be saying something of profound importance, but it didn’t make sense for you. Not yet, anyway.
Ron was walking towards you two, so all the depths the conversation was getting, disappeared.
“Hey, y/N, you used to help here at the shop,” Ron said with his hands on his hips. “You should come to do that again.”
“HA!” you laughed loudly. “Sorry, Ron, not freeing you from here so soon.”
Ron pretended to be hurt while George smiled at the interaction. He liked to know you hit it off well with all his brothers.
“Besides, I have a job now,” you added with a smirk.
George was surprised, but he didn’t need to ask where you worked because you were already answering.
“You’re looking at a Ministry’s employee,” you giggled while trying to copy the pronunciation of the voice of the lift from the Ministry, “Department of International Magical Cooperation.”
“Wow,” Ron widened his eyes. “Congrats!”
“Thank you, Ronald,” you said.
“Congrats,” muttered George from behind you.
You looked down at your wrist, attempting to hide your blush.
“Oh, Merlin!” you shouted. “I’m late for work!”
You headed to the door, forgetting to say goodbye.
“I was only gonna buy a book and now...” you sighed while giggling nervously.
“Y/N, before you go,” Ron’s voice called.
“Yes?” you turned around.
George was standing next to his brother — and for a second of distraction, it seemed like Fred and George were reunited. But then you shook your head, and Fred was gone.
“You should stop at the Burrow any time,” Ron said. “We’re staying there.”
You tilted your head in confusion. What did he mean with that?
George, on the other hand, understood his brother’s point and because of that, he elbowed Ron as if asking “what are you doing?”.
“Mum’d be delighted to have a guest for dinner,” Ron continued.
“Well, sure, Ron, I’ll stop by,” you answered, pressing your lips together, questioning. “If it’s okay.”
Ron opened a big smile while George only tilted his head.
“We’d be glad to have you for dinner,” George said, giving you the actual invite you wanted.
You smiled. “Then see you soon, boys! Take care!” and you headed for your job.
#george weasley#george weasley x reader#fred and george#george weasley imagine#Fred and George Weasley#george weasley x you#george weasley x slytherin reader#hp#harry potter#fred weasley#wizarding world
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A bathroom figures significantly in the origin stories of at least two classic One Direction songs. The first will be familiar to any fan: Songwriter and producer Savan Kotecha was sitting on the toilet in a London hotel room, when he heard his wife say, “I feel so ugly today.” The words that popped into his head would shape the chorus of One Direction’s unforgettable 2011 debut, “What Makes You Beautiful.”
The second takes place a few years later: Another hotel room in England — this one in Manchester — where songwriters and producers Julian Bunetta and John Ryan were throwing back Cucumber Collins cocktails and tinkering with a beat. Liam Payne was there, too. At one point, Payne got up to use the bathroom, and when he re-emerged, he was singing a melody. They taped it immediately. Most of it was mumbled — a temporary placeholder — but there was one phrase: “Better than words …” A few hours later, on the bus to another city, another show — Bunetta and Ryan can’t remember where — Payne asked, maybe having a laugh, “What if the rest of the song was just lyrics from other songs?”
“Songs in general, you’re just sort of waiting for an idea to bonk you on the head,” Ryan says from a Los Angeles studio, with Bunetta. “And if you’re sort of winking at it, laughing at it — we were probably joking, ‘What if [the next line was] “More than a feeling”? Well, that would actually be tight!’”
“Better Than Words,” closed One Direction’s third album, Midnight Memories. It was never a single, but became a fan-favorite live-show staple. It’s a midtempo headbanger that captures the essence of what One Direction is, and always was: One of the great rock & roll bands of the 21st century.
July 23rd marks One Direction’s 10th anniversary, the day Simon Cowell told Harry Styles, Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, and Louis Tomlinson that they would progress on The X Factor as a group. Between that date and their last live performance (so far, one can hope) on December 31st, 2015, they released five albums, toured the world four times — twice playing stadiums — and left a trove of Top 10 hits for a devoted global fan base that came to life at the moment social media was redefining the contours of fandom.
It’d been a decade since the heyday of ‘NSync and Backstreet Boys, and the churn of generations demanded a new boy band. One Direction’s songs were great and their charisma and chemistry undeniable, but what made them stick was a sound unlike anything else in pop — rooted in guitar rock at a time when that couldn’t have been more passé.
Kotecha, who met 1D on The X Factor and shepherded them through their first few years, is a devoted student of the history of boy bands. He first witnessed their power back in the Eighties, when New Kids on the Block helped his older sister through her teens. The common thread linking all great boy bands, from New Kids to BSB, he says, is, “When they’d break, they’d come out of nowhere, sounding like nothing that’s on the radio.”
In 2010, Kotecha remembers, “everybody was doing this sort of Rihanna dance pop.” But that just wasn’t a sound One Direction could pull off (the Wanted did it only once); and famously, they didn’t even dance. Instead, the reference points for 1D went all the way back to the source of contemporary boy bands.
“Me and Simon would talk about how [One Direction] was Beatlesque, Monkees-esque,” Kotecha continues. “They had such big personalities. I felt like a kid again when I was around them. And I felt like the only music you could really do that with is fun, poppy guitar songs. It would come out of left field and become something owned by the fans.”
To craft that sound on 1D’s first two albums, Up All Night and Take Me Home, Kotecha worked mostly with Swedish songwriters-producers Carl Falk and Rami Yacoub. They’d all studied at the Max Martin/Cheiron Studios school of pop craftsmanship, and Falk says they were confident they could crack the boy-band code once more with songs that recalled BSB and ‘NSync, but replaced the dated synths and pianos with guitars.
The greatest thing popular music can do is make someone else think, “I can do that,” and One Direction’s music was designed with that intent. “The guitar riff had to be so simple that my friend’s 15-year-old daughter could play it and put a cover to YouTube,” Falk says. “If you listen to ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ or ‘One Thing,’ they have two-finger guitar riffs that everyone who can play a bit of guitar can learn. That was all on purpose.”
One Direction famously finished third on The X Factor, but Cowell immediately signed them to his label, Syco Music. They’d gone through one round of artist development boot camp on the show, and another followed on an X Factor live tour in spring 2011. They’d developed an onstage confidence, but the studio presented a new challenge. “We had to create who should do what in One Direction,” Falk says. To solve the puzzle the band’s five voices presented, they chose the kitchen sink method and everyone tried everything.
“They were searching for themselves,” Falk adds. “It was like, Harry, let’s just record him; he’s not afraid of anything. Liam’s the perfect song starter, and then you put Zayn on top with this high falsetto. Louis found his voice when we did ‘Change Your Mind.’ It was a long trial for everyone to find their strengths and weaknesses, but that was also the fun part.” Falk also gave Niall some of his first real guitar lessons; there’s video of them performing “One Thing” together, still blessedly up on YouTube.
“What Makes You Beautiful” was released September 11th, 2011 in the U.K. and debuted at Number One on the singles chart there — though the video had dropped a month prior. While One Direction’s immediate success in the U.K. and other parts of Europe wasn’t guaranteed, the home field odds were favorable. European markets have historically been kinder to boy bands than the U.S.; ‘N Sync and Backstreet Boys found huge success abroad before they conquered home. To that end, neither Kotecha nor Falk were sure 1D would break in the U.S. Falk even says of conceiving the band’s sound, “We didn’t want it to sound too American, because this was not meant — for us, at least — to work in America. This was gonna work in the U.K. and maybe outside the U.K.”
Stoking anticipation for “What Makes You Beautiful” by releasing the video on YouTube before the single dropped, preceded the strategy Columbia Records (the band’s U.S. label) adopted for Up All Night. Between its November 2011 arrival in the U.K. and its U.S. release in March 2012, Columbia eschewed traditional radio strategies and built hype on social media. One Direction had been extremely online since their X Factor days, engaging with fans and spending their downtime making silly videos to share. One goofy tune, made with Kotecha, called “Vas Happenin’ Boys?” was an early viral hit.
“They instinctively had this — and it might just be a generational thing — they just knew how to speak to their fans,” Kotecha says. “And they did that by being themselves. That was a unique thing about these boys: When the cameras turned on, they didn’t change who they were.”
Social media was flooded with One Direction contests and petitions to bring the band to fans’ towns. Radio stations were inundated with calls to play “What Makes You Beautiful” long before it was even available. When it did finally arrive, Kotecha (who was in Sweden at the time) remembers staying up all night to watch it climb the iTunes chart with each refresh.
Take Me Home, was recorded primarily in Stockholm and London during and after their first world tour. The success of Up All Night had attracted an array of top songwriting talent — Ed Sheeran even penned two hopeless romantic sad lad tunes, “Little Things” and “Over Again” — but Kotecha, Falk and Yacoub grabbed the reins, collaborating on six of the album’s 13 tracks. In charting their course, Kotecha returned to his boy band history: “My theory was, you give them a similar sound on album two, and album three is when you start moving on.”
Still, there was the inherent pressure of the second album to contend with. The label wanted a “What Makes You Beautiful, Part 2,” and evidence that the 1D phenomenon wasn’t slowing down appeared outside the window of the Stockholm studio: so many fans, the street had to be shut down. Kotecha even remembers seeing police officers with missing person photos, combing through the girls camped outside, looking for teens to return to their parents.
At this pivotal moment, One Direction made it clear that they wanted a greater say in their artistic future. Kotecha admits he was wary at first, but the band was determined. To help manage the workload, Kotecha had brought in two young songwriters, Kristoffer Fogelmark and Albin Nedler, who’d arrived with a handful of ideas, including a chorus for a booming power ballad called “Last First Kiss.”
“We thought, while we’re busy recording vocals, whoever’s not busy can go write songs with these two guys, and then we’ll help shape them as much as we can,” Kotecha says. “And to our pleasant surprise, the songs were pretty damn good.”
At this pivotal moment, too, songwriters Julian Bunetta and John Ryan also met the band. Friends from the Berklee College of Music, Bunetta and Ryan had moved out to L.A. and cut a few tracks, but still had no hits to their name. They entered the Syco orbit after scoring work on the U.S. version of The X Factor, and were asked if they wanted to try writing a song for Take Me Home. “I was like, yeah definitely,” Bunetta says. “They sold five million albums? Hell yeah, I want to make some money.”
Working with Jamie Scott, who’d written two songs on Up All Night (“More Than This” and “Stole My Heart”), Bunetta and Ryan wrote “C’mon, C’mon” — a blinding hit of young love that rips down a dance pop speedway through a comically oversized wall of Marshall stacks. It earned them a trip to London. Bunetta admits to thinking the whole 1D thing was “a quick little fad” ahead of their first meeting with the band, but their charms were overwhelming. Everyone hit it off immediately.
“Niall showed me his ass,” Bunetta remembers of the day they recorded, “They Don’t Know About Us,” one of five songs they produced for Take Me Home (two are on the deluxe edition). “The first vocal take, he went in to sing, did a take, I was looking down at the computer screen and was like, ‘On this line, can you sing it this way?’ And I looked over and he was mooning me. I was like, ‘I love this guy!’”
Take Me Home dropped November 9th, just nine days short of Up All Night’s first anniversary. With only seven weeks left in 2012, it became the fourth best-selling album of the year globally, moving 4.4 million copies, per the IFPI; it fell short of Adele’s 21, Taylor Swift’s Red and 1D’s own Up All Night, which had several extra months to sell 4.5 million copies.
Kotecha, Falk and Yacoub’s tracks anchored the album. Songs like “Kiss You,” “Heart Attack” and “Live While We’re Young” were pristine pop rock that One Direction delivered with full delirium, vulnerability and possibility — the essence of the teen — in voices increasingly capable of navigating all the little nuances of that spectrum. And the songs 1D helped write (“Last First Kiss,” “Back for You” and “Summer Love”) remain among the LP’s best.
“You saw that they caught the bug and were really good at it,” Kotecha says of their songwriting. “And moving forward, you got the impression that that was the way for them.”
Like clockwork, the wheels began to churn for album three right after Take Me Home dropped. But unlike those first two records, carving out dedicated studio time for LP3 was going to be difficult — on February 23rd, 2013, One Direction would launch a world tour in London, the first of 123 concerts they’d play that year. They’d have to write and record on the road, and for Kotecha and Falk — both of whom had just had kids — that just wasn’t possible.
But it was also time for a creative shift. Even Kotecha knew that from his boy band history: album three is, after all, when you start moving on. One Direction was ready, too. Kotecha credits Louis, the oldest member of the group, for “shepherding them into adulthood, away from the very pop-y stuff of the first two albums. He was leading the charge to make sure that they had a more mature sound. And at the time, being in it, it was a little difficult for me, Rami and Carl to grasp — but hindsight, that was the right thing to do.”
“For three years, this was our schedule,” Bunetta says. “We did X Factor October, November, December. Took off January. February, flew to London. We’d gather ideas with the band, come up with sounds, hang out. Then back to L.A. for March, produce some stuff, then go out on the road with them in April. Get vocals, write a song or two, come back for May, work on the vocals, and produce the songs we wrote on the road. Back to London in June-ish. Back here for July, produce it up. Go back on tour in August, get last bits of vocals, mix in September, back to X Factor in October, album out in November, January off, start it all over again.”
That cycle began in early 2013 when Bunetta and Ryan flew to London for a session that lasted just over a week, but yielded the bulk of Midnight Memories. With songwriters Jamie Scott, Wayne Hector and Ed Drewett they wrote “Best Song Ever” and “You and I,” and, with One Direction, “Diana” and “Midnight Memories.” Bunetta and Ryan’s initial rapport with the band strengthened — they were a few years older, but as Bunetta jokes, “We act like we’re 19 all the time anyway.” Years ago, Bunetta posted an audio clip documenting the creation of “Midnight Memories” — the place-holder chorus was a full-throated, perfectly harmonized, “I love KFC!”
For the most part, Bunetta, Ryan and 1D doubled down on the rock sound their predecessors had forged, but there was one outlier from that week. A stunning bit of post-Mumford festival folk buoyed by a new kind of lyrical and vocal maturity called “Story of My Life.”
“This was a make or break moment for them,” Bunetta says. “They needed to grow up, or they were gonna go away — and they wanted to grow up. To get to the level they got to, you need more than just your fan base. That song extended far beyond their fan base and made people really pay attention.”
Production on Midnight Memories continued on the road, where, like so many bands before them, One Direction unlocked a new dimension to their music. Tour engineer Alex Oriet made it possible, Ryan says, building makeshift vocal booths in hotel rooms by flipping beds up against the walls. Writing and recording was crammed in whenever — 20 minutes before a show, or right after another two-hour performance.
“It preserved the excitement of the moment,” Bunetta says. “We were just there, doing it, marinating in it at all times. You’re capturing moments instead of trying to recreate them. A lot of times we’d write a song, sing it in the hotel, produce it, then fly back out to have them re-sing it — and so many times the demo vocals were better. They hadn’t memorized it yet. They were still in the mood. There was a performance there that you couldn’t recreate.”
Midnight Memories arrived, per usual, in November 2013. And, per usual, it was a smash. The following year, 1D brought their songs to the environment they always deserved — stadiums around the world — and amid the biggest shows of their career, they worked on their aptly-titled fourth album Four. The 123 concerts 1D had played the year before had strengthened their combined vocal prowess in a way that opened up an array of new possibilities.
“We could use their voices on Four to make something sound more exciting and bigger, rather than having to add too many guitars, synths or drums,” Ryan says.
“They were so much more dynamic and subtle, too,” Bunetta adds. “I don’t think they could’ve pulled off a song like ‘Night Changes’ two albums prior; or the nuance to sing soft and emotionally on ‘Fireproof.’ It takes a lot of experience to deliver a restrained vocal that way.”
Musically, Four was 1D’s most expansive album yet — from the sky-high piano rock of “Steal My Girl” to the tender, tasteful groove of “Fireproof” — and it had the emotional range to match. Now in their early twenties, songs like “Where Do Broken Hearts Go,” “No Control,” “Fool’s Gold” and “Clouds” redrew the dramas and euphorias of adolescence with the new weight, wit and wanton winks of impending adulthood. One Direction wasn’t growing up normally in any sense of the word, but they were becoming songwriters capable of drawing out the most relatable elements from their extraordinary circumstances — like on “Change Your Ticket,” where the turbulent love affairs of young jet-setters are distilled to the universal pang of a long goodbye. There were real relationships inspiring these stories, but now that One Direction was four years into being the biggest band on the planet, it was natural that the relationships within the band would make it into the music as well.
“I think that on Four,” Bunetta says with a slight pause, “there were some tensions going on. A lot of the songs were double — like somebody might be singing about their girlfriend, but there was another meaning that applied to the group as well.”
He continues: “It’s tough going through that age, having to spread your wings with so many eyeballs on you, so much money and no break. It was tough for them to carve out their individual manhood, space and point of view, while learning how to communicate with each other. Even more than relationship things that were going on, that was the bigger blanket that was in there every day, seeping into the songs.”
Bunetta remembers Zayn playing him “Pillowtalk” and a few other songs for the first time through a three a.m. fog of cigarette smoke in a hotel room in Japan.
“Fucking amazing,” he says. “They were fucking awesome. I know creatively he wasn’t getting what he needed from the way that the albums were being made on the road. He wanted to lock himself in the studio and take his time, be methodical. And that just wasn’t possible.”
A month or so later, and 16 shows into One Direction’s “On the Road Again” tour, Zayn left the band. Bunetta and Ryan agree it wasn’t out of the blue: “He was frustrated and wanted to do things outside of the band,” Bunetta says. “It’s a lot for a young kid, all those shows. We’d been with them for a bunch of years at this point — it was a matter of when. You just hoped that it would wait until the last album.”
Still, Bunetta compares the loss to having a finger lopped off, and he acknowledges that Harry, Niall, Liam and Louis struggled to find their bearings as One Direction continued with their stadium tour and next album, Made in the A.M. Just as band tensions bubbled beneath the songs on Four, Zayn’s departure left an imprint on Made in the A.M. Not with any overt malice, but a song like “Drag Me Down,” Bunetta says, reflects the effort to bounce back. Even Niall pushing his voice to the limits of his range on that song wouldn’t have been necessary if Zayn and his trusty falsetto were available.
But Made in the A.M. wasn’t beholden to this shake-up. Bunetta and Ryan cite “Olivia” as a defining track, one that captures just how far One Direction had come as songwriters: They’d written it in 45 minutes, after wasting a whole day trying to write something far worse.
“When you start as a songwriter, you write a bunch of shitty songs, you get better and you keep getting better,” Ryan says. “But then you can get finicky and you’re like, ‘Maybe I have to get smart with this lyric.’ By Made in the A.M. … they were coming into their own in the sense of picking up a guitar, messing around and feeling something, rather than being like, ‘How do I put this puzzle together?’”
After Zayn’s departure, Bunetta and Ryan said it became clear that Made in the A.M. would be One Direction’s last album before some break of indeterminate length. The album boasts the palpable tug of the end, but to One Direction’s credit, that finality is balanced by a strong sense of forever. It’s literally the last sentiment they leave their fans on album-closer “History,” singing, “Baby don’t you know, baby don’t you know/We can live forever.”
In a way, Made in the A.M. is about One Direction as an entity. Not one that belonged to the group, but to everyone they spent five years making music for. Four years since their hiatus and 10 years since their formation, the fans remain One Direction’s defining legacy. Even as all five members have settled into solo careers, Ryan notes that baseless rumors of any kind of reunion — even a meager Zoom call — can still set the internet on fire. The old songs remain potent, too: Carl Falk says his nine-year-old son has taken to making TikToks to 1D tracks.
There are plenty of metrics to quantify One Direction’s reach, success and influence. The hard numbers — album sales and concert stubs — are staggering on their own, but the ineffable is always more fun. One Direction was such a good band that a fan, half-jokingly, but then kinda seriously, started a GoFundMe to buy out their contract and grant them full artistic freedom. One Direction was such a good band that songwriters like Kotecha and Falk — who would go on to make hits with Ariana Grande, the Weeknd and Nicki Minaj — still think about the songs they could’ve made with them. One Direction was such a good band that Mitski covered “Fireproof.”
But maybe it all comes down to the most ineffable thing of all: Chance. Kotecha compares success on talent shows like The X Factor to waking up one morning and being super cut — but now, to keep that figure, you have to work out at a 10, without having done the gradual work to reach that level. That’s the downfall for so many acts, but One Direction was not only able, but willing, to put in the work.
“They’re one of the only acts from those types of shows that managed to do it for such a long time,” Kotecha says. “Five years is a long time for a massive pop star to go nonstop. I know it was tiring, but they were fantastic sports about it. They appreciated and understood the opportunity they had — and, as you can see, they haven’t really stopped since. Most of them weren’t necessarily musicians before this happened, but they loved music, and they found a love of creating, writing and playing. To have these boys — that had been sort of randomly picked — to also have that? It will never be repeated.”
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Creator meme
Thank you @indelibleevidence for the tag!
RULES: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works <3
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This made me realize once again how much Fandom helped me through the pandemic for a few months - browsing through my own tags there’s so much stuff I’d completely forgotten about!
1) “Jane Doe” - a 3 part comic series (especially the first one)
Post 5x10, where Jane has lost her memories because of the ZIP, and slowly bonds again with Kurt and the team. Originally it was meant to be a 4 to 5 part comic series, but I needed to get it done before the finale aired, and I ran out of time. Since I have the lines written down somewhere, I may write it as a fic at some point, albeit a very minimalist one (and it would count as canon divergent post 5x10), because it was meant to be a comic script.
Still, the first part of this comic took SO LONG and while I can still pick at things I could have done better, I’m proud of it anyway, especially because my specialty are chibi-like drawings. Cute is my cup of tea, serious is haaaard.
2) “Ever After” - a bittersweet Jeller oneshot.
Technically there is a second chapter to this, but reads more as an epilogue, so this could be read as a standalone (and I don’t know if I’ll ever get to finishing that 2nd chapter! I’ll try, though).
I mostly wrote it for myself as a fix-it fic (sort of) after the series finale. While I stubbornly will stay in happy-ending camp, sometimes when I saw images of the sad-ending, that feeling of dread filled my gut. I had some ideas in my head to narratively justify what happened, including the odd dinner scene, so I rushed to write it out while the Muse kicked and screamed at me to do so.
So in the fic, it starts as Jane collapses to the ground, but not everything is rosy and magically fixed. Both Jane and Kurt have to deal with the aftermath of what happened, and be there for each other as they learn their new normal and start healing from it, in the way supportive partners do ♥
3) Nightmares - a hurt/comfort Jeller fanart.
Post 4x12, this is how I’d imagine things may go, at least sometimes. Jane almost died (again), and even though she is now fine, has her memories and is no longer poisoned, losing her is still Kurt’s biggest fear, and he has nightmares about it in the following days or weeks. Not all the time, but when they show, it hits hard. She’d always try to reassure him as best she can, whispering words of comfort as he mumbles incoherently and apologizes for what could have been.
While some details about it still bug me (why am I like this) I still like this drawing a lot. One of the many scenes of Jeller in bed that are in my headcanon, if only finding good references for Jane’s tattoos (other than her arms) wasn’t such a hassle, I swear I’d have done so many more.
4) Honest screencaps: one & two (I couldn’t choose)
I just had to lol when I was rewatching season 1 earlier in the year and screencapping things for drawing reference and because of reasons, some facial expressions where just too good not to caption. The ridiculous lines worked even better as a screencap-comic rather than an actual comic, imo.
It’s so much fun.
5) Too tired for subtlety - a silly Jeller comic.
Early season 5, Kurt is still very much a workaholic, even in the bunker. But this time, Jane is not having it. Mwahaha.
It took a while to find photos of the relevant tattoos, and even then I had to BS a good bunch of them because the images were too blurry to tell xD. I swear if they released an artbook I’d buy it in a second. They could use the same pictures they had in SIOC where Jane was standing up with all her tats, they blur out the necessary bits and have a map of ALL the tattoos, dammit!
How am I supposed to draw Summer Jeller when drawing Jane in a bathing suit is gonna take 5 hours just to find references D:?
Bonus) :D this ridiculous video (feat Rich’s rescue)
Basically, expectations vs reality.
This tiny video took way more than I’d like to admit lol and it still looks so choppy. But it’s part of the charm, right? lol Even so, the idea wouldn’t leave me alone and I had to do it. And I feel honored and proud that Ennis saw it on instagram xD
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Hmmm, trying to tag people Amy hasn’t tagged yet! @marv-el-spot @birdsaesthetic @mchellesvanity @whatshouldjustbeours @singinprincess
Anyone else, feel free to do it! So much fun.
#blindspot#creator meme#blindspot fanart#blindspot fanfic#fandom things#blindspot fam#blindspot fandom#fic recs#my faves#my stuff#yay!#2020#2020 creations#motivation for 2021#this was a lovely road through memory lane#also i'm sure i'd have some faves from the gifsets but they're just too many lol#they were such a good stress relief#jeller
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