#i also reread like three or four entire series so you can perhaps guess at my energy levels in relation to my executive dysfunction

[scorpius-rising]

Read some books and graphic novels this year and some of them were good. So I put them in some lists, which are linked below. Cheers 👍

Graphics/Manga

Books

[dear-yandere]

—ask collection!

a collection of mostly very old chats and sweet asks that i never got around to answering! thanks for the patience and love!! 

beware, fairly long post... woops....

chat asks.

darling: Eu-jin is best boy. Change my mind.

vanya: i am physically incapable of fulfilling that request, how dare you do that to me... i’m biased since he’s my own oc, but i would die for my (very best) boy eu-jin... who can resist such a gentle yandere that loves you so whole-heartedly?

that reminds me! he’s actually based off of kuroyuki and gekkamaru from the otome nightshade, so if you want similar characters by any chance, do check them and the game out ♡

darling: I was watching the dub for Part 5 of JoJo's Bizarre adventure yesterday...Mista called himself Daddy and I like- sdfghjfgsdhnhnmj!! My heart can't take this--

vanya: WAIT HE DID???? i’m not even big on daddy kink and reading that made me go 😳 this is vital information to know... what episode was this??? for research purposes, of course. gotta perfect my yan! mista, after all~...

darling: for yandere songs, have you heard of the major to minor covers by chase holfelder :O? the way he delivers the lyrics in some songs (betty, all i want for christmas), added with the key changes to minor, is really fantastic, and gives a stalker-ish vibe imo! and he's a really good singer in general

vanya: i have!! a good chunk of them are actually on my personal yandere playlist, so i end up hearing them frequently when i’m writing!! i haven’t been keeping up with his uploads recently, so ‘betty’ is completely new to me and just, wow???????????? this man is an absolute god send for us “romantic” horror fans... ♡

this ask gave me such a lovely idea, though, darling: assigning yandere types/mbti based off each of chase’s minor key covers. i think i’ll do that just for you. ♡

darling @blossomiich​: I reread some of your old character interaction asks and saw the one with Jotaro hugging his Darling after a panic attack and the elephant seal plush reminded me of the iconic C H O N K Y ringed seal plushie that was kinda trending and I can totally imagine Jotaro having one of those >w< that's so adorable!

vanya: i honestly don’t remember that interaction, but then again i don’t remember most things hmghng so i looked it up and

j...just imagine star plat hogging it and not letting joot cuddle with it 🥺 the duality of man...thank you for this cute image...

darling: Umm, sorry for asking this. I'm just curious because of your bio language in your header. Are you Chinese too, perhaps?

vanya: no worries!! i’m mixed guyanese (indian, chinese, & possibly black and/or portuguese), but my family only celebrates (or rather, acknowledges?) our indian descent, since the majority of our family is predominantly east indian. 

my header is actually a quote from a danmei novel (and one of my all-time favorite fandoms), tiān guān cì fú (heaven’s official blessing)!

darling genki stan anon: Omg you're writing for free now, i didn't expect that one lol. It's a cute show innit? Not a nagi stan but I feel like nagisa has that kinda unsnapped personality that would make him peak delusional yandere material lolol like oikawa but less threatening and without his head being up his own ass 😂. Hope you're doing well!! -gsa

Gdjsjs im such a fool, i think my last ask said something about not thinking you'd write for free when i literally just pointed out kisumi on your sideblog LMAO my bad 😅 😂 also ill hold back on the gen chan requests because ive already asked so many in the past! Thank you though 🥺. Also feel free not to post this, it can just dip into my onesided chats with my lil flower 💐 so long as you receive them im fine 😌 -genki stan anon

vanya: nagisa isn’t my favorite (kisumi is), but gods if he wouldn’t make a great yandere. honestly, out of the iwatobi boys, nagi is probably the most unhinged. i wouldn’t peg him as delusional, at least not at first; i think he’s very lucid and knows exactly what he wants and how to manipulate people in order to get it!!! kisumi is fairly similar now that i think about it... i might... have a type...

please feel free to send in gen-chan requests whenever you want!!!! i’m kinda super asocial, so it’ll take me a while to answer, but i love getting asks from you since you’re so sweet and excitable!!! your little flower reads and cherishes them all!! 🥺

also darling genki stan anon: Sorry for spamming you with asks hdjkdks, u dont even need to reply im just kinda brain empty venting here whether you recieve them or not 😂 i just needed to confess that while yes i am #1 gen simp, and he is undoubtedly my fave oc of yours but that Ilya tentacle smut had me very much so highkey kinda 👀, had to re read the genki oral style drabble to bring my head back. He dont even need to worry about luca bc that man a thot. I think therin is a thot too but like lowkey, a classy thót -gsa

vanya: omg i’ve kept this one for forever mnmghngh i might’ve even answered at some other point, now that i think about it... but i just 🥺 gosh i hope i find my muse soon, because i really wanna write you a genki fic 🥺 hhhh

the ilya tentacle smut was so in character for that boy... i have no clue how to write monsters, much less tentacles, but i’d honestly do anything for him 🙏 kinky russian boy...

therin is definitely a classy thot, the kind that only bangs the finest concubines then turns around and slut shames you for banging the very same prostitutes gbfmngnfg rules don’t apply to him, in his kingdom...wish that were me tbh ✊😔

sweet asks.

darling one: i've read almost all of your dazai and chuuya fics and i love them so much!! your formatting is also super aesthetic just a question, i saw on your kofi that you also draw so i was wondering if you drew all the header arts?? bc they're all super pretty :) have a great day!

darling two: Just wanted to say love the writing and the way your format your posts is so aesthetically pleasing. One day I hope my posts looks half as good as yours because I legit can't get over how pretty and organized it looks.

vanya: omg thank you so much!!!! one of my bffs, yue, is to thank for the formatting and aesthetic choices, really! if you wanna see more of her aesthetic formats and posts, she actually runs a few blogs! you may know her as @milkscafe​, formally @milkaaton! i adore her and her aes choices so much 🥺

as for the headers, i don’t draw 99.98% of them! i have drawn a couple, but they’re so few and far in between since i almost never finish my art wips haha... my older posts are lacking proper credits because i’m an absolute idiot, but i’m slowly working my way backwards to credit them all where possible! they’re all indeed super pretty!!!

have a great day yourself, my love!!

darling: THEY’RE NOT BAD CONTENT, I LOVE THEM ALL

vanya: this was in response to a now-deleted lil blurb but i kept it in my inbox because i wanted to say i love u very much and seeing this ask each time i open my inbox makes my heart skip a beat ♡

darling: Listen I love your writing, you inspired me to start it myself! I've always loved to write, and read of course but your style and concepts just stick with me. If you where to write something besides Yandere content/fandom content and started your own series? I would read the shit, out of it. I'm always nervous to interact with my favorite writers because you know, I'm afraid of the impression I'd leave but I just wanted to say this anyway! 💞💞💞🔫😳

vanya: wowowow fgfnmgnfmngfg that’s such a high compliment my brain just gmfnbgmnf go boom fogjfngnfg and thank you for the interaction, us writers truly appreciate it no matter how awkward or nervous you think you may be / come off!!!

darling one: As a writer, your post struck a nerve with me. I don’t send feedback to writers I like nearly as much as I should (and certainly not as much as I’d like in return as a writer). So, as such, I’m going to start doing that when I can, starting with you.

You are an incredible writer. You were one of the first yandere writing blogs I found and you’re still one I check in on regularly to see what you have been working on. You can portray a sense of suspense and intrigue in a natural way that many other writers - published ones included - struggle with. You delve into the darkness without it feeling forced, and you have an amazing grasp on the psyches of the characters you write for (which is a quality I adore in writing and strive toward myself).

I’m not great at ending these things so I guess.. you keep doing you? Because the you is great and I appreciate it.

darling two:  hey. i'm here to tell you that from the bottom of my heart i love you and your writings. i really admire your writing skills. you inspire me. one of your posts once saved me from a nervous breakdown. thank you for everything you do. you're a wonderful person. good luck!

darling three: I wanted to tell you that thank you for writing such wonderful beautiful writings and that you take time to edit and write I hope you are taking care of yourself 💖❤

darling four: Thanks. I was having a hard time and deleted all my apps, but as soon as i opened my phone my first instinct was to look at your blog and i got my motivation back. Thanks (:

darling five: Hi ! I just wanted to say I really enjoy the stories you write and how they are detailed so well ! Stay safe and I hope you have a good day/night ! ლ(╹◡╹ლ)

vanya: ahhhh, these are very old asks mostly dating back to my “tumblr writing community is dying” post, and i’ve kept them this entire time because i’m just so starstruck. i have no clue how to reply to compliments, so i’m not sure what else to say besides that these asks made me very happy and got me through a few insecure moments!!! i’ve actually been feeling a little down about my writing recently, mostly because of lack of motivation / inspiration, so revisiting these really warmed my heart, so thank you truly ♡ i’m certainly keeping the originals in my inbox until the end of time!!

darling @monstrously-obsessed: psst, this local cryptic mom thing send all of their love for you 💕

vanya: your local herbo says she loves you very much momster 🥺 mwah

also, to the anon worried about my safety:

thank you so much for pointing that out!!! it hadn’t even crossed my mind when i made those ocs, so i appreciate your concern! i was contemplating revamping those two as is, so this is a great place to start! thank you again!!

[multiply014]

One Chilly Morning

Again, Happy CoAi Day, everyone!

I wrote this to cap off my 31 Days of CoAi project:

Last 4/1, ShinAi Day, I posted Accomplice (Chapter 2) to start off 31 Days of CoAi!

From 4/2 to 4/30, I posted fics daily on Tumblr. I’m still in the process of crossposting them on AO3 and FF (29 in between), Mondays and Fridays… If you want to read them, they’re on my Tumblr page, see tag “x prompt fills”.

Today, 5/1, I posted this, One Chilly Morning, which is the third and final part to One-verse (One Starry Night - One Rainy Afternoon - One Chilly Morning), to end 31 Days of CoAi!

Aside from fics, I’ve also posted:

On 4/1 and 5/1, I wrote two meta posts answering why I ship CoAi! If you want to read them, they’re on my Tumblr page, see tag “x meta”.

From 4/1 to 5/1, I posted about my ramblings about the CoAi fics I've written one by one daily! If you want to read them, they’re on my Tumblr page, see tag “x fic posts”.

I hope everyone had as much fun as I did throughout the project. I never thought I could pull it off, but, hey, I pulled through! The people who have expressed their support (and just when I need it most, too!) deserves credit for helping me complete this project… You know who you are! That’s you! 

Thank you so, so much..!

Now on to a bit of description about this work! One Chilly Morning is posted separately from One Rainy Afternoon because it can stand on its own. On AO3, I will be collecting the three works as a series, but you don’t really have to read One Starry Night and One Rainy Afternoon to get what’s up here. It’s just a bit of a plus if you did..!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this final post for 31 Days of CoAi!

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31 Days of CoAi Prompt Fill 31 of 31:

One Chilly Morning

Fandom (Pairing): DCMK (CoAi) Title: One Chilly Morning Summary (Word Count): Shinichi wakes up early one morning just in time to see The White Mazda(tm) parked outside Hakase’s house, and consequently has bad mood for most of the day. (1228) Links: Also on AO3 and FF. Part 1 and 2 is also on Tumblr (tag: x dcmk one rainy afternoon)

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It’s a chilly morning. Shinichi doesn’t think he’s sick, but he gets up earlier than usual. To kill some time before he’s expected to be out and about, he goes to the study to get some books—because what do you do when you wake up early, really?

His mind isn’t up to speed in the early hours yet, and he can’t seem to settle on a book to reread. His restless eyes find themselves looking out the window. He tells himself he’s not peeking at Hakase’s house, but he is, and the first thing he sees is a white Mazda parked just outside the gate.

It’s Amuro’s car.

His thoughts are confirmed when the front door opens and out comes Amuro and Haibara, one after the other, Hakase seeing them off. In Amuro’s hand is a Fusae shoulder bag—of course, he’s acting like a perfect gentleman. Hakase waves enthusiastically, like a mom sending off her daughter for marriage, to that bag-carrying gentleman all shiny and cheery in the morning—and Shinichi doesn’t really want to think about that, and how he feels a vague sense of betrayal at the image.

The two disappear into the car, Shiho first because of course sparkly host in a gray suit that Shinichi thinks is not really flattering in the morning has to open the car door for the shotgun seat for Haibara—and she doesn’t bat an eye, no hesitation, zero. That makes Shinichi feel increasingly more betrayed to the point that he can’t even push it down with denial because clearly this is not the first time for Haibara and Mr. Blondie to go somewhere together. He hates that he doesn’t know where.

And so, as with all unimportant things regarding Haibara, he doesn’t even bother deducing anything. He just straight up asks her—three rings, four rings, and then five.

She’s not answering.

—For her to be unresponsive, what the hell are they doing in the car in broad daylight?!

Just after the sixth ring, it connects—”Kudo-kun?”

“Where are you?” It comes out snappier than he wants to, but, whatever, the woman’s—just—out there!

A few seconds of silence, and Shinichi can hear Haibara thinking, before she answers, “What do you need?”

To Shinichi’s complete surprise—not—Haibara doesn’t answer his question. So, he just repeats, “Where are you?”

In a beat, Haibara replies, a bit of panic in her voice, “..! Has something happened to Hakase?!”

This, Shinichi quickly denies, “Huh, no! Just, what are you doing?”

Shinichi hears an audible sigh before a tired voice says, “Then why are you so cranky? I’m outside. What do you need?”

Shinichi presses, “Outside, where?”

“Why are you always so weird? On my way to work, why? A case?”

Work, huh… huh? So does this mean since Haibara got the job, Amuro’s always been driving her there?!

Haibara’s voice brings him back from his thoughts, calling him, “Kudo-kun?”

Automatically, he answers, “What?”

“You...” He can hear the irritation in her voice.

Now, Shinichi is confused. What did he do to annoy her this time? “...What?”

“You’re really asking me what?! You’re the one who called out of nowhere, idiot!” She ends the call.

He calls again. It goes to voicemail and he has no doubt that she blocked him.

Haibara blocked his number. She actually blocked him!

This… infuriating… woman!

Whatever! It’s not like he cares!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

He does, in fact, care.

He makes sure he’s presentable and all but runs to the professor’s house. When Shinichi spots Hakase, he starts practically grilling him with questions, the professor rattling off the answers as fast as he can before Shinichi can fire off the next—

“—Yes, Shinichi, they go to work together.”

“—Yes, Shinichi, it’s been a while, but I don’t remember when it started.”

“—No, Shinichi, I don’t know why; maybe she can tell you?”

“—Hahaha! Shinichi, what did you say for her to block you?”

“—What did you need her for, Shinichi? If it’s urgent, I can tell her.”

Shinichi sighs, and shakes his head, saying, “Nothing, it’s nothing.”

Hakase casts a doubtful look at him, but ultimately acquiesces, “If you say so, Shinichi...”

As he mooches off Hakase’s breakfast, he grumbles. Hakase casts numerous surreptitious glances at Shinichi, before his curiosity wins out, and he finally asks, “Why the interest then?”

Shinichi jumps at the question, and the lettuce leaf he had been torturing with his fork drops on the plate. He immediately shakes his head and denies, “Nothing! It’s just—I saw them today, I… I thought something was up. If there isn’t anything then, I don’t know, whatever, I guess???”

A beep rings out from Hakase’s phone, and, surprisingly, the professor reads the message out loud, “‘Hakase, please check if the dumbass is sick?’”

Without the professor saying the sender, Shinichi blushes and mumbles something about why she doesn’t just go and enjoy the car ride to work instead of worrying about someone she totally didn’t confess to.

Hakase’s knowing smile hidden by his hand, he tries to keep his voice even as he suggests, “Maybe I should just tell her you’re sick, Shinichi?”

Shinichi replies, “I’m fine, Hakase.”

“Well... you don’t know, maybe she’d come home early if we say you are.”

Shinichi replies, a bit louder this time, “I’m fine, Hakase!”

Sighing, then shaking his head, Hakase drops the issue, “Whatever you say, Shinichi...”

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Dinner time rolls around, and Shinichi’s phone lights up. When he sees that woman’s name on his phone’s notifications, he hesitates… but ultimately opens it. He reads the message: Come over for dinner.

Shinichi immediately sends a message… to Hakase: Hakase, what did you tell her?

A few excruciating minutes after that Shinichi totally did not notice go by, he receives a reply: Shinichi, I don’t know what you’re talking about?

Hmm. He might as well go in person to tell the professor—and, might as well, her, too—that he’s fine. It’s just next door, after all.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

On the table, okayu is served with the usual side dishes, and at the center is a pot of what smells like ginger tea.

Before anyone can say anything about the spread, Shiho clears her throat and says, “It’s been chilly recently.”

“Yeah,” is Shinichi’s intelligent reply.

(Hakase is grinning in the background, but neither notice.)

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By the time Shinichi is back at the mansion, he still feels so unbearably warm that he wonders why he isn’t sweating… perhaps he’d caught the flu after all?

He does not think about that morning. He does not think about her message to Hakase. He does not think about her message to him.

He certainly does not think about the dinner.

He does not think about how he did not say he isn’t sick. He does not think even the slightest bit of why he didn’t call her out on her oh-so-obvious intentions, preparing those dishes for dinner. Intentions that he does not think about, too.

Of course, he does not think about how she /must/ have noticed that he did not call her out on it. Which had been unintentional. He simply forgot to point it out—the porridge is just that well-made after all. He’d insist on it being so had he been thinking about it. But he isn’t, so.

Yep, he does not think about all of those.

(He does.)

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Sigh... I want to rewrite (again!) the entire first chapter, One Starry Night… And I want to beat up past me for ever thinking it was a good idea to promise to write another chapter of One-verse. (Literally no one asked for it. Please, past self, why are you so masochistic?)

And, wow, this is really, really the end of 31 Days of CoAi... What a run..!

Check out my 31 Days of CoAi series on AO3 for a better formatted information on my project!

[bookedbookshelf]

Revisiting Harry Potter After 12 Years: The Great, the Good, and the Bad

Some Background on Harry Potter and I...

When I was a child, I practically breathed Harry Potter. The books were everything to me. I used to connect every conversation around me to HP in every way that I could (to the great annoyance of my entire family.) But I didn’t care that I could see their indifference or that my older sister used to make fun of me for reading it. I didn’t care that I had annoyed her so much with the topic that she began to call it “Harry Pothead.” Harry Potter was my thing as a kid- a fixation I never quite got rid of, even as an adult. To this day, nothing can get me into a passionate debate the way that a Harry Potter-based conversation can. I watch the movies at least once a year with my nephews.

I read Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone for the first time when I was in the third grade. I had trouble reading chapter-books and writing during this time. Looking back on it, it makes a lot of sense that I was probably suffering from some kind of learning disability. If it was ever diagnosed, I’m not sure, but I had been going to a special reading and writing program twice a week since grade one. The purpose of putting me in this program was to try and keep pace with the other students around me who were beginning to read and write with a speed that I just could not match.

Even now, I remember how much it embarrassed me. I hated feeling stupid and like I lacked something the other students had. And so, when my teacher announced to my class that he would be reading Harry Potter to us during Story Time, I asked my father to purchase the book for me, so I could read along. It was a huge decision that I still remember the exact moment that I made it. That decision was the foundation for my love of reading. Reading Harry Potter, and struggling to keep up with my teacher, but doing it regardless, cemented my love for the books. It was the first chapter book I ever read cover to cover. When I put that book down, I no longer felt stupid. I felt accomplished.   

The number of times I reread the first three books are countless. I can confidently say I have read every Harry Potter book, except the last, more than four times. I have only read Death Hallows twice, once when first released in 2007 and again last month.

So, why did I wait so long to reread these books I so desperately loved and endlessly talked about?

I think I was afraid that I’d reread them and find faults and flaws that would make me become sad. I didn’t want to find a reason to distance myself from these books, I wanted them to remain this untouched relic of my childhood that turned me into an avid reader. I know so many people have the same story of learning to love reading because of Harry Potter. For me, it turned something I hated, dreaded, and pretended to do, into something I actively sought. Harry Potter changed everything about my childhood education and is probably a massive reason why I want to be an author today. I owe so much to these seven magical books about a boy who lived in a cupboard.

So...why, after all this time, did I change my mind? Why did I reread all of the books?

That sister who called it “Harry Pothead” finally decided to read them and when she told me that she was on the fourth, I was suddenly inspired to pick up my books and reread them too. And so I did, one after the other, cover to cover, first until last.

So...has anything changed? Is this series still a nostalgic favourite that cannot be touched by criticism for me?

Nope, but I still love them!

The Review: 4.5/5

Let’s start with the fact that this review is not spoiler free, as it has been...12 years since the last HP book came out. I feel that is a plentiful grace period and if you haven’t read it by now, I doubt you care much about spoilers. Even so, please take into consideration that this entire review is spoiler- heavy. 

Harry Potter perfectly captures a few things through the entire series: the pain of isolation, the importance of friendship, and the fear of failure.

But Harry Potter also lacks sorely in some areas and we’ll touch on that. While I will not be going book by book, because I was a dummy who didn’t consider doing this when I began to reread them, I will break down some of the major themes and what the series lacks or did poorly. Having flaws doesn’t make Harry Potter bad. Despite everything, these books are still like a 4.5/5, with just some nitpicky flaws from my perspective.

So let’s get started with what Harry Potter did well, in my opinion.

What I Liked...

Isolation and Character-Building:

All of the books captured Harry’s isolation perfectly. Through every novel, you wish that he still had his family and he didn’t have to fulfill an insane destiny that was thrust upon him the moment Voldemort saw him as a threat. As I am older, I understand Mrs. Weasley so. much. more. I understand why she worried about Harry so much, he was indeed just a boy.

As the novels go on, every loss that Harry suffers feels like a sucker-punch to the stomach, because you know Harry started out with so little and it feels like he is losing things for shock value. For good or bad, I can say that these books know how to tug at your heart and make you invested in the main character, as well as the side characters. One of the things that Harry Potter does best is its large cast of interesting and sympathetic characters. You even pity Voldemort’s origins and how he was created despite him being a monster of a man.

Magical World Building:

All of the books capture the wonder and magic of the Harry Potter universe with effortless beauty. There was pure genius in ensuring that Harry grew up like a muggle because it allowed us as readers to experience Diagon Alley, Hogwarts, and all of the other magical places in the books, as Harry did. It allowed us to learn about magic as he did and it created a sense of being there beside Harry, learning as he did.

Never once does it feel like laws of the world are being peddled off just to catch the reader up to speed. This is something Rowling does amazingly and something I am so in awe of even to this day. Harry going to Hogwarts during his first year felt like we went with him and I’ll never forget how thrilling it was to read as a child.

Blending Other Genres into a Fantasy Series:

As the books go on, little mysteries are written here and there are truly very well executed. Especially in the Goblet of Fire, which always felt like a hybrid mystery/fantasy novel to me, as we’re trying to discover who put Harry’s name in the Goblet. Furthermore, as the books mature, so do the characters. Through book five, six, and seven, there is an aspect of romance, as Harry has fallen in and out of crushes a couple different times. I love that Rowling blends other book genres into the story very well.

Relationship Building:

As the books go on, the relationships between characters develop. Many people think Ron/Hermione was terrible, but I disagree. I thoroughly enjoyed seeing Ron coming to realise he felt strongly for her and Hermione grappling with her gender identity and feeling invisible to both Harry and Ron as a female. I thought the Ron and Hermione love was actually well thought out and developed over several books, despite popular opinions.

Complex Characters:

Harry Potter has an array of complex characters, ranging from Dumbledore to Lupin, James, Sirius, and Snape. While there are characters that I despise with a bitter passion despite them being fan favourites (ahem, Snape,) I can still recognise that many of the villainous characters in HP are written BRILLIANTLY. I love me some problematic and interesting characters who keep you guessing (ahem, also Snape.) Brilliant writing, through and through.

Conclusion:

Overall, the story throughout the books is gripping and takes you through each page with absolute ease. The pacing of these books never lacked for me or dragged- the story was thoroughly gripping and entertaining, cover to cover.

But there are some things that could be better.

What I Didn’t Like...

What the Hell is Going on with the Magic System???:

Harry Potter is littered with magical inconsistencies and perhaps the MOST glaring is the Fidelius Charm. Let’s talk about Secret Keepers. Okay, we talked about it, they’re flipping stupid. I cannot express how much frustration these things have caused me over the years.

WHY DIDN’T JAMES JUST BE HIS OWN SECRET KEEPER IF THAT WAS POSSIBLE...EH, BILL WEASLEY? EH?

I feel like the Fidelius Charm has the most crippling plot holes and ret-cons out of all of the spells inside of the HP world. Why is this a problem? Well, it is only a huge freaking catalyst in the entire story: using the Fidelius Charm with the wrong people is what caused Lily and James Potter to die. I feel that more attention should be paid to the way a spell can and cannot work in the book, or else everything falls apart. Yes, we could say that James’ flaw was wanting to trust and believe in his friends, and so he didn’t make himself the secret keeper….but that is freaking dumb. The life of his wife and child were on the line, no one would spare any possible measure of safety, not even James Flipping Potter.

Let’s move onto the god.damned.trace. THE TRACE. I hate the trace mostly because of its glaring inconsistencies. It is the worse case of plot-convenience-holes throughout the series. Let’s talk about how Voldemort murdered his father and his grandparents without the Ministry even blinking an eye, as this did not happen in a wizard's house, unlike him attacking his Uncle. Because the exact way the trace works has never been specified in book canon, it leaves glaring plot holes everywhere. While I do not hate the concept of the trace, I definitely hate the execution.

Harry and Ginny? Are We Serious?:

While I did praise Rowling for her relationship developing, Harry being into Ginny felt very very very sudden and out of nowhere. Harry never considered Ginny romantically until the 6th book, fine, but his romantic interest came out of...no where? One day in the common room he noticed she smells like the flowers he smelled in Slughorn’s love potion...okie dokie. 

While we can say this is because Harry had to spend that summer playing Quidditch with her, Ron, and Hermione at the Burrow, to have these feelings come upon him. I say bull-crap. We know Rowling put years into the development of Ron and Hermione, building it up through multiple books. As a result, Harry and Ginny felt cheap, last minute, and insincere. I wouldn’t have minded the couple, if she put more time making it believable.

What the Hell Happened to Lupin in the 7th Book?:

Lupin turning into a full-on edgelord in the seventh book felt like such a cop-out to the type of character we had seen thus far. And yes, we can explain it as Harry seeing Lupin as an adult to admire and not really like a person with complicated feelings and emotions. But wanting to ditch Tonks to go on an adventure? Sorry, can’t relate. Lupin’s sudden character change felt cheap and like there was nothing leading up to the sudden change. Even the tension beforehand did not seem grand enough for this.

Let’s Talk About Deaths:

The undeniably worst thing for me about Harry Potter is how poorly Rowling writes deaths. They are just...horrible. She leaves so little detail in the actual death happening, it’s always one or two sentences max that vaguely outline someone’s death. And I am sure she does this to give you a snap sense of someone suddenly dying, but it feels unbelievably cheap and poorly thought out. Furthermore, I truly believe no one but Dumbledore needed to die throughout the last few books to advance the plot, and yet we’re hit with death after death that lent nothing to the plot.

Sirius dying felt rushed and unnecessary. What plot did his death further lend, what did it spur into action? You may say Harry needed to have everything taken from him to truly be okay with learning his fate in the last book, but I say no. I think it was just another thing written in to remind the audience of how alone Harry is and it felt lacklustre and poorly executed. I don’t hate that Sirius died, but I hate when he did. I felt killing him so early and for no reason was outrightly silly.

The biggest problem is it did not lend to the effect that Rowling intended- it did not make me feel hollow inside for Harry. It didn’t make me cry when it happened. It doesn’t hit in an impactful way at all. It just felt like Sirius died to a series of clumsy mistakes (largely due to his own actions,) but still clumsy nonetheless. Of course, characters can be killed suddenly and hard-hitting for . However, when reading through the books, it felt like Sirius’ death didn’t actually have such a far-reaching impact as it should have had. He felt discarded of in a very poorly managed way. It was as if Rowling made up a list of “people to kill” because she thought her story wouldn’t be real enough without death.

Similarly, Tonks and Lupin feel very much the same. Their deaths are more justifiable, as they are casualties of a battle, but the problem was they happened off page. You have no connection to how it happened or why, they’re just dead, in a room full of other bodies. Many argue this is impactful because it is the cost of war, but I argue differently. I argue that just seeing them dead in the Great Hall takes all of the impact out of their deaths. I feel practically all of the deaths throughout the Battle of Hogwarts were handled this way and it wasn’t as gripping as I’d like it to be. I loved Tonks and Lupin as characters, but it just felt like a shrug of the shoulders, because it was given so little time of contemplation.

Snape, on the other hand, was written very well. We saw how it happened, we saw that he knew it was about to go down. We saw his last breaths and the painful way that he died. The entire scene is very emotionally gripping, unlike the way the other deaths are handled throughout the ending quarter of Deathly Hallows.

To me, it just felt more effort was put in some deaths over others, leaving a majority of them to feel cheap, poorly planned, and poorly executed.

So, is Harry Potter Worth Reading? Even As an Adult?  

Yes, Harry Potter, books 1-7, are thoroughly worth reading. They’re enjoyable, gripping, suspenseful in places, and truly magical. While there are some flaws, such as a lack of representation and a faulty magic system, the books hold up incredibly well and there is a reason they have endured this long as a childhood favourite. Think about it, the craze of other series such as Twilight, the Hunger Games, Divergent, and so on have all died out, but Harry Potter remains strong and relevant to this day. You can find Harry Potter merchandise easily in physical stores around the world. The truth is that Harry Potter endures so well because it is a coming of age story about so much more than magic.

Harry Potter flawlessly blends many relatable themes together, such as friendship, loyalty, uncertainty, loneliness, anger, and hope in the face of adversity together into a story of fantastically written characters and settings. Backpedaled by a good plot, interesting characters, and a bit of magic, alongside Rowling’s easy to read writing style, I have no doubts that Harry Potter will continue to endure for generations to come.

My sister, the one who teased me, is 32 now. She read through every book this year as well and upon finishing it, she told me that she wished there was more. A common feeling among anyone who has read all of the books cover to cover.

[libralita]

Reread Review!

Title: Secret History

Author: Brandon Sanderson

Summary:

Mistborn: Secret History is a companion story to the original Mistborn trilogy.

As such, it contains HUGE SPOILERS for the books Mistborn (The Final Empire), The Well of Ascension, and The Hero of Ages. It also contains very minor spoilers for the book The Bands of Mourning.

Mistborn: Secret History builds upon the characterization, events, and worldbuilding of the original trilogy. Reading it without that background will be a confusing process at best.

In short, this isn’t the place to start your journey into Mistborn. (Though if you have read the trilogy—but it has been a while—you should be just fine, so long as you remember the characters and the general plot of the books.)

Saying anything more here risks revealing too much. Even knowledge of this story’s existence is, in a way, a spoiler.

There’s always another secret.

Rating: ★★★★★

Original Review

Review:

The cry count on this reread was like four, this story makes me so emotional. Also the description is a lie, don’t read this unless you’ve read Bands of Mourning. I can’t really talk about this story without spoilers to the entire Mistborn series, along with other Cosmere books. This read through was so much more productive because I have a better understanding of how the Cosmere works. It was just as enjoyable as the first time. I recommend reading this review to my original but if you want to, you can read the other. Also, I was rereading this from Arcanum Unbounded so when I give the page numbers it comes from that collection.

“Kelsier breathed in and out, then growled, heaving himself to his feet. ‘Well,’ he proclaimed, ‘that was thoroughly awful.’ It did seem there was an afterlife, which was a pleasant discovery.”—Page 203

Ah, Kell always a snarky bastard.

“Metal and souls are the same thing, he observed. Who would have thought?”—Page 204

I dunno.

“‘Ah, child,’ Kelsier said. ‘I’m sorry.’ He reached out and cupped Vin’s face as she wept over him, and found her could feel her.”—Page 204

Poor, Vin.

“‘You let him kill you.’ Kelsier spun, surprised to find a person standing beside him. Not a figure made of mist, but a man in strange clothing: a think wool coat that went down almost to his feet, and beneath it a shirt that laced closed, with a kind of conical skirt.”—Page 204

So, is this like in Yolen fashion?

“‘Oh, hell,’ Kelsier said. ‘There’s actually a God?’ ‘Yes.’ Kelsier decked him.”—Page 205

Kell, please don’t punch god.

I find it interesting that Leras finds it a “duty that comes with my position” to comfort the souls before they got to the Beyond but Sazed takes pride in it. It could because of the different personalities of Leras and Sazed or because they’re Preservation and Harmony.

“Damn, Kelsier thought. He seems one step from falling apart himself. Well, you had to work with what you had. ‘You’ve got to have some kind of idea what I could try, Fuzz.’ ‘What did you call me?’”—Page 207

God help Leras.

“‘Wonderful?’ Kelsier felt like spitting. ‘He’s a tyrant, Fuzz.’ ‘He’s unchanging,’ God said, defensive. ‘He’s a brilliant specimen. So unique. I don’t agree with what he does, but one can empathize with the lamb while admiring the lion, can one not?’ ‘Why not stop him? If you disagree with what he does, then do something about it!’ ‘Now, now.’ God said. ‘That would be hasty. What would removing him accomplish? It would just raise another leader who is more transient—and cause chaos and even more deaths than the Lord Ruler has caused. Better to have stability. Yes. A constant leader.’”—Page 209

First of all, does Scadrial have lambs and lions are this point? I guess so. Second, yeah, I’m pretty sure the Lord Ruler dying a lot of deaths. Sieges and Ruin being a dick.

“‘Power is returning to the Well of Ascension,’ Kelsier said. Fuzz hesitated. ‘Hm. Yes. Um, but it’s far, far away. Yes, too far for you to go. Too bad.’”—Page 210

Does the Preservation shard make you an awful liar?

“‘You didn’t even fight.’ ‘I used the Eleventh Metal.’ ‘Foolishness,’ God said. He started pacing. ‘That was Ruin’s influence on you.’”—Page 211

Yep.

“You zinc-tongued raven.”—Preservation, Page 213

Okay, I get the zinc-tongued part because zinc riots emotions but why a raven?

“He shook, glancing toward Kelsier, and the sides of his head unraveled slowly—like a fraying rug, each threat seeping away and vanishing into nothing. ‘He’s killing me, you know. He wants me gone before the next cycle, though…perhaps I can hold out. you hear me, ruin! I’m not dead yet! Still…still here…’ Hell, Kelsier thought, cold. God is going insane. Fuzz started pacing. ‘I know you’re listening, changing what I write, what I have written. You make our religion all about you. They hardly remember the truth any longer. Subtle as always, you worm.’”—Page 218

I feel so bad for Preservation, he’s such a sad character. He’s dying and going insane, he’s trying to so hard to preserve humanity.

“‘I killed you,’ the Lord Ruler said. ‘Twice. Yet you live.’”—Page 219

Yeah, I know, he’s annoying.

Rashek, don’t you dare call Preservation an impotent mouse!

“I told you, by this point rational people want to move on.”—Preservation, Page 220

Yeah, Kell isn’t rational and neither is Wax.

“Oh, he couldn’t hear it. But could he “hear” anything? He didn’t have ears. He was…what had Fuzz said? A Cognitive Shadow? A force of mind, holding his spirit together, preventing it from diffusing. Saze would have a field day. He loved mystical topics like this.”—Page 226

Cognitive Shadows confuse me.

“It was when he started talking to himself that he really got worried. ‘What have you done?’ ‘I’ve saved the world. Freed mankind. ‘Gotten revenge.’ ‘The goals can align.’ ‘You are a coward.’ ‘I changed the world!’ ‘And if you’re just a pawn of that thing Beyond? Like the Lord Ruler claimed? Kelsier, what if you have destiny other than to do as you’re told?’”—Page 229

And you’re going insane.

“This, however, was not a figure made of mist. It was a man with stark white hair, his face defined by angular features and a sharp nose. He seemed vaguely familiar to Kelsier, but he couldn’t place why.”—Page 230

Hey, Hoid, sorry I didn’t recognize you last time.

I love Michael Kramer but seriously Ati’s name has been mentioned like three times and each he’s pronounced it differently. Pick one!

“‘Got stuck here, did you?’ the man said. ‘In Ati’s prison…’ He clicked his tongue. ‘Fitting recompense, for what you did. Poetic even.’ ‘What I did?’ ‘Destroying the Pits, O scarred one. That was the only perpendicularity on this planet with any reasonable ease of access. This one is very dangerous, growing more so by the minute, and difficult to find. By doing as you did, you basically ended traffic through Scadrial. Upended an entire mercantile ecosystem, which I’ll admit was fun to watch.’”—Page 230

Okay so the Pits were a way for worldhoppers to get to Scadrial, a perpendicularity. Okay. And Kell destroyed that. Which is interesting.

“‘Who are you?’ Kelsier said. ‘I?’the man said. ‘I am a drifter. A miscreant. The flame’s last breath, made of smoke at its passing.’ ‘That’s…needlessly obtuse.’ ‘Well, I am that too.’”—Page 230

I love Hoid, he should interaction more with Kell.

“‘Alas,’ the Drifter said. ‘Your case is hopeless.’ Kelsier felt his heart sink. ‘Yes, nothing to be done,’ the Drifter continued. ‘You are, indeed, stuck with that face. By manifesting those same features on this side, you show that even your soul is resign to you always looking like one ugly sonofa—’ ‘Bastard,’ Kelsier cut in. ‘You had me for a second.’”—Page 231

Jesus Christ I love these two interactions.

The most disappointing thing in the entire Cosmere is that Kell didn’t participate in the insult battle with Hoid.

“‘I’m going to murder you,’ Kelsier said softly. ‘I—Wait, what?’ ‘If you step inside here,’ Kelsier said, ‘I’m going to murder you. I’ll slice the tendons on your wrists so your hands can’t do anything more than batter at me uselessly as I kneel against your throat and slowly crush the life out of you—all while I remove your fingers one by one. I’ll finally let you breathe a single, frantic gasp—but at that moment I’ll shove your middle finger between your lips so that you’re force to suck it down as you struggle for air. You’ll go out knowing you choked to death on your own rotten flesh.’”—Page 233

Kelsier is clearly sane.

“‘Seriously,’ Drifter said. ‘You need some help, friend. I know a guy. Tall, bald, wears lots of earrings Have a chat with him next—’”—Page 233

Wait, Hoid knows Sazed? Does this mean he’s MET Sazed or he knows OF Sazed?

“‘I see,’ Fuzz said softly. ‘He dared that, did he? Dangerous, with ruin straining against his bonds. But if anyone were going to try something so foolhardy, it would be Cephandrius.”—Page 236

Okay so Hoid, Dust and Cephandrius are names Hoid goes by.

“‘That…’ Preservation said, trailing off. ‘That?’ Kelsier prompted. ‘That’s utterly wrong.’”—Page 241

Me, trying to participate in the Cosmere Fandom.

“You tried to rescue a boatful of people from a fire by sinking them boat, then claiming, ‘At least they didn’t burn to death.”—Page 244

I love Preservation calling Kell out.

“‘This is where you joke that you aren’t certain which was more dangerous to release. Me or the other one.’ ‘No,’ Fuzz said. ‘I know which is more dangerous.’ ‘Failing marks for effort there, I’m afraid.’ ‘But perhaps…’ Preservation said. ‘Perhaps I cannot say which is more annoying.’”—Page 250

I love Preservation, I can’t wait to get to know Leras.

“‘I mean,’ Kelsier continued, ‘yes, we ended up releasing a world-ending force of destruction and chaos, but at least the Lord Ruler is dead. Mission accomplished. Plus you still have your nobleman boyfriend, so there’s that. Don’t worry about the scar on his stomach. It’ll make him look more rugged. Mists know, the little bookworker could use some toughening up.’”—Page 255

Kell, you aren’t helping.

“And…to the south…what was that? People?”—Page 258

Malwish.

“Kelsier held Preservation, in awe at the creature’s divine agony. Then Kelsier pulled him close, into an embrace. ‘I’m so sorry,’ Kelsier whispered. ‘Oh, Senna…’ Preservation whispered. ‘I’m losing this place. Losing them all…’”—Page 258

Oh god poor Preservation. Also who is Senna? An old god or old lover?

“‘So,’ Kelsier said, glancing at the sky with its shifting, writhing mass of too solid tendrils, ‘anyone else bothered by the voracious force of destruction in the air above us?’”—Page 262

That’s the evil force of doom, thank you!

“‘How?’ the man sputtered. ‘What? When…’ ‘…Why?’ Kelsier added helpfully. ‘Yes, why!’ ‘I have a very delicate constitution, you see,’ Kelsier said. ‘And death seemed like it would be rather bad for the digestion. So I decided not to participate.’”—Page 262

I think I love Nazh’s interaction with Kell more than Hoid’s.

What, you can’t tell us where Nazh is from?

“‘Sixteen,’ Kelsier breathed. ‘There are fourteen more of these things running around?’ ‘The rest are on other planets.’ ‘Other…’ Kelsier blinked. ‘Other planets.’ ‘Ah, see,’ Nazh said. ‘You’ve broken him already, Khriss.’”—Page 265

Down the rabbit hole we go!

“‘Going?’ Preservation said. ‘You’re leaving me?’ The urgency of those words startled Kelsier. ‘If these people can help us, then I need to talk to them.’ ‘They can’t help us,’ Preservation said. ‘They’re…they’re callous. They plot over my corpse like scavenging insects waiting for the last beat of the heart. Don’t go. Don’t leave me.’”—Page 270

My poor baby.

“‘Your mind is too fragile. It will break.’ ‘I broke that damn thing years ago, Fuzz. Do it. Please.’”—Page 272

That is true.

“Surely she couldn’t have expected him to just give in, to let the stretching darkness take him? Everyone else I’ve seen passed willingly, Kelsier thought. Even the Lord Ruler. Why must I insist on remaining?”—Page 282

Because you’re a stupid SOB?

“Cold wood that somehow remembered warmth. This fire was dead in the real world, but it wished it could burn again.”—Page 283

It’s easier than a stick to convince to become fire. Now I’m realizing that Kell had done some form a soulcasting.

Okay so even objects have an Identity from Investiture and that’s why you have boats, sticks and campfires that have some form sentience.

“It was a gift I gave. Life. Wondrous, beautiful life. They joy of a new child, the pride of a parent, the satisfaction of a job well done. These are from me. But it is done now, Kelsier. This planet is an elderly man, having lived his life in full, now wheezing his last breaths. It is not evil to give him the rest he demands. It’s a mercy.”—Page 289

While I agree that you need Ruin and need things to end, bro we still got three more eras.

“‘Sure,’ Kelsier said. ‘Tell Fuzz he’s to take something long, hard, and sharp, then ram it up your backside for me.’”—Page 290

I do like this.

“This turned out to be an enormous glowing cord as thick as a large tree trunk. It pulsed with a slow, rhythmic power, and the light it gave off was the same shade as the walls—only far more brilliant. It seemed to be some kind of energy conduit, and ran off into the far distance, visible in the darkness for miles.”—Page 297

The thing to transport the Dor.

“The power coursing through this place kept giving him visions of another world—and, he realized with discomfort, the energy seemed to be permeating him. Mixing with his soul’s own energy, which had already been touched by the power at the Well. In a few brief moments, he had started to think that place with the green plants looked normal.”—Page 299

Does this have something to do with Connection? Like when Allik uses Connection to change what language he speaks, it changes his soul to make it think he grew up in the Basin and therefore speaks the language. So the Dor energy is changing Kell’s Connection to where his soul thinks he grew up on Sel where green plants are normal?

“‘How could a Threnodite have made it all the way here?’ the other guard snapped. ‘It defies reason, I tell you.’”—Page 300

I guess a Threnodite coming around to Scadrial is really rare?

“‘Well, well,’ the ancient creature said. ‘My foresight does not seem so foolish now, does it, Captain? The Powers of Threnody wish to join the main stage. Engage the device.’”—Page 301

What’s going on, on Threnody? Besides eviler Dementors? Are they trying to get the Preservation Shard to save their planet?

“Yes…These were writing, though most of the pages were filled with terms he couldn’t begin to comprehend, even once he began to be able to read the symbols themselves. Terms like ‘Adonalsium’, ‘Connection,’ ‘Realmatic Theory’.”—Page 304

I actually know what all three of these things are!

Kell is so cruel to the Elantrians but because they want to hurt Preservation, then I don’t feel that bad.

“I could serve you, Vessel. I—”—Page 312

Damn, she can change sides pretty easily.

“‘Come now, Fuzz, when have you known me to be wrong?’ ‘Well, there was—’ ‘Those don’t count. I wasn’t fully myself back then.’ ‘And…when did you become…fully yourself?’ ‘Only just now,’ Kelsier said. ‘You could…you could use that excuse…anytime…’ ‘Now you’re catching on, Fuzz.’”—Page 327

I love these two.

“Kelsier! Preservation said, his voice strengthening. Do better than you have before! They call you their god, and you were casual with their faith! The hearts of men are NOT YOUR TOYS. ‘I…’ Kelsier licked his lips. ‘I understand. My Lord.’ Do better, Kelsier, Preservation commanded, his voice fading. If the end comes, get them below ground. It might help. And remember…remember what I told you, so long ago…Do what I cannot, Kelsier. SURVIVE.”—Page 333

BRB gonna go cry.

“Elend blinked. ‘Wow. I hate you already.’”—Page 355

I love Elend.

“Elend Venture placed a hand on Kelsier’s shoulder. ‘You need to pay better attention,’ he noted. ‘Kid.’”—Page 355

Oh, Elend, I wish you’d interacted more with Kell.

“He stepped closer to Vin. ‘I….’ What did he say? Hell, he didn’t know. Force once, he didn’t know. She embraced him, and he found himself weeping. The daughter he’d never had, the little child of the streets. Though she was still small, she’d outgrown him. And she loved him anyway. He held his daughter lose against his own broken soul.”—Page 356

God, this book is breaking me.

Kell, stop decking gods. Also who’s Vax and Senna? I’m sure it’ll take us 10 books to find out.

“Once, you taught me an important lesson about friendship. I need to return that lesson. A last gift. You need to know, you need to ask. How much of what you’ve done was about love, and how much was about proving something? That you hadn’t been betrayed, bested, beaten? Can you answer honestly, Kelsier?”—Vin, Page 358

God, Vin has grown so much.

“He considered, then—perhaps against his better judgment—jabbed the thing through his ear. Kelsier appeared in the room with him. ‘Gah!’ Spook said, leaping back. ‘You! You’re dead. Vin killed you. Saze’s book says—’ ‘It’s okay, kid.’ Kelsier said. ‘I’m the real one.’ ‘I…’ Spook stammered. ‘It…Gah!’”—Page 362

Kell, please leave poor Spook alone. *Sighs* Harmony, help that poor boy.