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My Wife: babe I think my dad might be autistic

Me: your face-blind, emotionally oblivious, picky eater of a father, who has numerous niche interests and the best-organized fly-tackle-box I have ever seen, might be autistic?

My Wife: you knew?

Me: you didn’t?

My Wife: babe I’m not ok I’m having a whole-

Me: you can hear the TVs, babe.

My Wife: What

Me, pointing at the special no-flicker lighting I installed in our house so that we never actually have to have the Big Overhead Light on: babe!

My Wife: … oh my god am I autistic?

Me:

My Wife:

Me: you didn’t know!?

My Wife: YOU DID!?

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Round1

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if you ever get impostors syndrome when applying for a job remember they let fucking anyone aboard the belgica

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just saw in some stupid medical drama someone burst into the hospital with an injured person over their shoulder and they said "is anyone here a doctor????" . that's so fucking dumb. thats like going into a rock climbing gym and saying "does anyone wanna start a podcast????" like thats the only people who go there dipshit

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stop with the tractor penis story i believed you for a second

well you should because it's true. and it's horrific. mcfadyen did not get proper tractor certification and he ran over hugh grant's cock penis and balls. a national treasure's cock penis and balls. destroyed. #tractorsafety #nomoreneedlesscockdestroying

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DOECHII NISSAN ALTIMA - Swamp Session

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the relationship between tomas cromwell and anne boleyn in these books just really defies description. they’re sisterwives to henry viii together. they’re eve and the serpent. they’re each other’s other woman. she’s his hag. he might have been in love with her sister but they don’t talk about that. she trusts him because he’s not noble and therefore expendable but that’s the main reason she doesn’t trust him. he put her in power and is actively trying to supplant her because he wants to watch her think her way out of it. she tried to get him beheaded yesterday but today they’re getting brunch. he’s her right hand left hand arm. she’s his silly rabbit. does he call her that. no

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next time you encounter something confusing, try using your fan fiction reading device to access websites like "wikipedia" or "miriam webster" to break down those pesky difficult topics. its sorta like a "enemies to lovers" situation, where the scary new knowledge can become your friend - and then you won't look so unflattering when you comment

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How did the Niles-Daphne plot come about? David Hyde Pierce: I can tell you the idea for the whole thing came at one of the very first photo shoots we did before filming the series… Jane Leeves: I think I actually said it to you during the pilot. David Hyde Pierce: She said, “I wonder if we would have some sort of thing going”, and then we sort of did the photo shoot kind of hanging out all over each other. I don’t think we actually spoke to the writers about it; it was based on seeing us that was the kernel of the idea.

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ok but why is this scene giving looking at pics of you and your ex on insta after yall broke up vibes

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they should invent a constructive feedback that doesnt make me feel like the guy on the ten of swords tarot card

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uooooogh the christian God is actually deer skull and raccoon salmon in pickup truck ooooooooooooooo and She (god) (usually refererd to as Male but im Queering it) talked to me in parking lot and said uh h Life Is Decay Anr Rotting and Sunlight is actually the souls of deer skull and i was like woah but im just little old me from somewhere in the contiguous USA and She (god) (Queering it) said being Yourself is th e most important thing and that i should Vote

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Me: im trans

Snake: Hrm... trans huh? give me a moment

Snake goes into a box and calls up his husband

Snake: Otacon, this lady dropped a piece of intel in regards to herself, do you know what "trans" means

Otacon: Snake, that's short for the term "transgender" a phrase used for those who's identity doesn't align with their asigned sex, some use hormones or surgery to better fit their lifestyle

Snake: Chemical and Surgical modification huh? they're like supersoldiers but they choose to change to fight for their own spirits rather than a nation...

Otacon: Remember snake, being "trans" is an umbrella label, many in the community identify beyond our common gender binary, including traditional cultural gender roles or wholly new ones

Snake: A wide variety of genders, such diversity not only make them unpredictable but increases practical versatility, impressive stuff

Otacon: oh this is just like Lily Hoshikawa from my Japanese animes

Snake leaves the box

Snake: You're pretty good huh? this trans stuff sounds intense, you have my support as a fellow soldier

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The point of marriage is not to create a quick commonality by tearing down all boundaries; on the contrary, a good marriage is one in which each partner appoints the other to be the guardian of his solitude, and thus they show each other the greatest possible trust. A merging of two people is an impossibility, and where it seems to exist, it is a hemming-in, a mutual consent that robs one party or both parties of their fullest freedom and development. But once the realization is accepted that even between the closest people infinite distances exist, a marvelous living side-by-side can grow up for them, if they succeed in loving the expanse between them, which gives them the possibility of always seeing each other as a whole and before an immense sky.

― Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

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