#i also *almost* feel bad about the fact 3/4 of my ocs are similar to characters in this comic

[yeehawkins]

[slams fists on the table] How To Be A Werewolf was made for me

-shadowy wolves with pure white eyes

-gay lanky scruffy guy

-magical lesbians/bi gals

-depeche mode reference in flavor text of a page

[resplendent-chungus]

Fanfic 20 questions! This seems really fun, thanks for tagging me @followerofmercy

1. How many fics do you have on AO3?

Twenty-six! Which I think is a bunch when not compared to insane people who right, say, a hundred twenty fics. Cough Mercy.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

179,826, though I will add since I got my start in fic writing quests on Sufficient Velocity, there's another 113.2K that's not on AO3.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

My tastes are as fickle as the wind. I am a wandering ronin writing whatever I feel like. I theoretically write RWBY but also haven't updated a RWBY fic since January. I thought I was done with Madoka fics but then I heard news about the movie and had no choice but to write Heartless. I've written 3 A Practical Guide To Evil fics over 5 years. Who fuckin knows with me?

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Breaking and Entering Your Heart (Madoka Magica) is, somehow, my most kudo'd fic of all time. I have no idea why. I don't think it's particularly good (not helped by the fact that I was like 16 when I wrote it). It's not even my favourite Madoka fic I wrote as a teenager!

Doka Don't You Know (Madoka Magica) is my favourite Madoka fic I wrote as a teenager. It's still kind of embarrassing for me to read back, but I do think I did good with it. The real embarrassing part is that it was inspired by me getting emotional listening to the Ninja Sex Party song of a similar name.

Drabble Roulette (Steven Universe) is sort of cheating, as it was a drabble collection I did with several friends, but nevertheless it's one of the most kudo'd fics I've worked on. We all did a short fic every week based on the same one-word prompt, and God we kicked ass.

I can almost hear the Hounds (RWBY) is definitely the one I'm most proud of. What if Ruby got turned into a Hound before V1? Well everyone would be sad, for one. It also holds the distinction of being the first time anyone's ever done a "Cast of [show] reacts!" thing to a fic I've read. Talk about an ego boost!

And my fifth-most kudo'd fic is... Actions, Consequences, and the Tragic Lack Thereof (Worm)? The edgy oneshot I did where a very well-adjusted Taylor uses Coil's power to blow off steam? Huh. Not either of my RWBY oneshots? Well I suppose I can't complain.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Not really. I try, but as I've said before responding to comments is my dump stat. I really do love everyone's comments, I'm sooo insanely bad at responding sdgsd

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

It depends on what qualifies as an angsty ending; most of my angsty fics have happy endings, with Heartless being the only one I've written to really contradict that. Blood, Blood, Gallons of the Stuff and Sometimes the only way out is as a carcass have the worst endings insofar as horrible fates, but I wouldn't really call them angst.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Trim and nothing else? It depends on how you define it, but I'd say that one.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really, thankfully. I straight up can't remember anything of the sort lmao

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Boy, do I! Of the smut I've published, I'd say it's pretty varied? Some het, some gays, some ships and an OC or two... I've got the variety, baby.

10. Do you write crossovers? If so, what's the craziest one you've ever written?

Not really? I find they're usually more daydream material than hunker-down-and-write material, though sometimes I have no choice. I have a chapter or two of the most self-indulgent APGTE/RWBY crossover that I doubt I'd ever put out there on account of it having a target audience of exactly one. Craziest would probably be the Madoka Magica/Magical Girl Noir Quest crossover I wrote as a teenager. It's harder to get more self-indulgent than fanfiction of a fanfiction crossing it over with the source material sdgds

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I sort of vaguely remember this happening? I remember someone posting a really poorly written edgy SU fic that had the exact same premise as my slightly better written edgy SU fic and only updated after mine did.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of, though if anyone wants to please feel free.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really? The Drabble roulette is the closest I've come, and that was a bunch of individual shorties. Besides, I can't imagine I'd have a great time trying to fit my writing process with someone else (and I definitely don't think they'd have a good time trying to adjust to me lmao)

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

God that's tough. I'm not sure I can give a definitive answer here. I might have to say Madohomu or Midlink just because of how deeply they've altered my brain chemistry

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Brother that is most of what I've written. I really want to get Tomorrow I'll be perfect and You waxen wing, you foolish thing done at some point, though I'm not sure I'm will. The Most Insane Girls On Remnant is a work so in progress that only one person knows it even exists, and if I could magic myself into fully writing one it would probably be that one.

16. What are your writing strengths?

If I could write an entire book of nothing but snarky narrators I would be a new york times bestseller by now. They are my bread and butter. Comedy in general, I guess, but that specifically.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action scenes. Action scenes action scenes action scenes. It's not so much that I think I'm bad at them, more that they're just so hard for me. I could write a thousand words of most anything else before I write five hundred words of an action scene.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I don't super mind it when reading, but I can't imagine writing it. Maybe a word or two, but still.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I wrote down Madoka Magica at first, but now I'm realizing it was actually Warrior Cats, all the way back when I was a wee little child. I'm not sure if I deleted them or just changed ff.net accounts at some point, but I don't know where they are and I'm happy that way.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I mean it's gotta be I can almost hear the Hounds. There's a lot of other things like (Aw Drat, Tomorrow I'll be Perfect, etc) but this one hold a special place in my heart. There's a reason I have chapter on pinned in my blog.

Damn that took me like three days to write. I shall pass the curse onto @golddragon387, of course, and perhaps @borkthemork to torment him

[i-need-entertainment]

Haikyuu!! Boys and who’s sister they’d unknowingly date

**Keep in mind, it may happen that not all of these characters actually HAVE sisters, but let’s just ~pretend~ for entertainment purposes. I also put in names for the sisters, but feel free to put your name/an OC’s name and descriptions!!**

Characters: Akaashi, Washio, Konoha, Kita, Ushijima, Yahaba, Iwaizumi, Futakuchi, Daishou and Numai.

This has taken me...days.. I kid you not. THESE ARE REALLY LONG oOps

**I HAVE ADDED Numai Kazuma BECAUSE HE IS AN INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE MAN AND NEEDS MUCH MORE ATTENTION**

Akaashi Keiji: 

It was during the Tokyo training camp.

Akaashi was with Bokuto, Kuroo, Tsukishima, Hinata and Lev in the 3rd gym in the middle of another 3 on 3 match.

Despite his initial concerns they weren’t doing too bad. It helps that the other team was comprised of 3 middle blockers where no one adequately knew how to set, and their newbie (Hinata) was just a *little* bit better than Lev.

“TETSURO YOU JERK!!!” They all turned towards the door where a girl wearing a black t-shirt with red athletic shorts came running in, straight towards the middle blocker. Kuroo, who had a smirk across his face began to retreat. 

“Welp, looks like it’s time for me to go. See you guys later!”

“Oh no you don’t. Where did you put my phone?! It’s been missing for over 2 hours. 2 HOURS!”

Akaashi looked at the girl, noticing she was really pretty. She had beautiful brown eyes, and her black hair was styled into two French braids, which were bouncing as she desperately tried to attack the middle blocker.

“Try checking the club room, I saw him and Bokuto go in there earlier and come out snickering like idiots,” He heard an offended gasp from Kuroo and a ‘Hey!’ from Bokuto. “Thank you, at least someone here has some decency.” Akaashi nodded.

He didn’t really know what it was but he felt intrigued by the girl and he wanted to know more about her.

“I’ll come with you, I have an idea of where they might have put it.” The girl smiled and nodded her head. As they were making their way out of the gym he heard Kuroo say ‘simp’ while Bokuto asked ‘who is’, he stopped listening after that. He spends too much time with them as it is, it’s best to preserve the brain cells he can.

“I’m Azumi by the way, thank you for helping me, you didn’t have to do that.” Akaashi smiled, “I’m Akaashi, it’s not a big deal really You’re actually doing me a favor by getting me out of there.”

The girl, Azumi laughed. ‘She has a pretty laugh..’ Akaashi’s eyes slightly widened at his thoughts. He just met the girl! What’s wrong with him.

Pushing the thought aside he continue to chat and talk with the girl, learning she was also a second year and Nekoma’s manager.

They got to the club room and started looking for the device.

“Why did they take your phone?” Azumi sighed and shrugged her shoulders. “My best guess is for their own entertainment, Tetsuro is always doing things like that.” Akaashi nodded and tried his best not to appear as disappointed as he felt.

Of course she’s dating Kuroo, he’s smart, good looking popular. Figures...

“Sometimes I wonder why out of all the people on the planet I had to get him as a brother, y’know?” Akaashi’s head shot up at her words.

‘Brother?!!?’ He almost laughed at himself. Looking at the situation now it was obvious the two were siblings. He smiled, he still had a chance.

“Yeah I know the feeling. Sometimes I think, out of all the spikers why did I have to get Bokuto.” Azumi laughed again, “I don’t think Fukurodani would still be standing if you weren’t there to reign him in. Not to mention you’re a really good setter and vice-captain.” He felt the tips of his ears turn red as he tried not to stumble over his words.

The rest of the training camp went smoothly, the two became pretty solid friends and exchanged numbers making plans to meet soon.

He went home with a smile on his face and a warm feeling in his heart.

And then he realized, he had a crush...

A crush on Kuroo’s little sister...

oops.

Washio Tatsuki: 

Washio had just gotten out of practice, a really good practice actually.

Everything went pretty smoothly, Bokuto had no tantrums, he nailed a really good spike and it was just a good day all around.

Because of this wonderful day, he figured he’d go to a café he had been wanting to try.

It was a small little coffee shop that had opened about a year ago but he hadn’t had the chance to go yet.

He walked in and was seated by the hostess at a small table by the window.

“Hi there! My name’s Yui and i’ll be your waitress today! Can I get you something to drink?” Washio looked up to see a girl, somewhere around 5′7, with white/silver hair that was tied up in a ponytail. She had the biggest smile he had ever seen, heck she was probably the prettiest girl he’d ever seen.

He ordered his drink (focusing hard so he wouldn’t mess up in front of the pretty girl) and she gave him another bright smile.

“Coming right up!” She walked away going behind the counter to get the drink. Apparently the girls enthusiasm was contagious, because Washio swore he was feeling better than when he and walked in here. And he was feeling pretty good.

She also looked really familiar..but he couldn’t place just where she seemed familiar from.

Removing himself from his thoughts he turned his attention back to the girl, who was back with his drink.

I really hope this doesn’t sound weird or creepy, but do you go to Fukurodani?” Washio seemed a bit surprised by this, but he chalked it up tot he fact he was wearing his school uniform.

He nodded, “I do, do you go there too?” The girl excitedly nodded her yet. “Yup! I’d know that uniform anywhere! Oh! You’re on the volleyball team! Washio, right?” He nodded again. “Sorry if I seem random, my brother’s on the team too so i’ve seen a few games. You’re really good!”

Washio could feel his cheeks burning. No one had ever complimented him like this, well aside from his coach/teammates and family.

“T-thanks...it means a lot...” The girl smiled, a bit more sheepish this time.

“Of course...you’re actually my favorite to see play. My brother’s a spiker so I’m used to his antics but it’s nice to see talented blockers too. Plus, blockers are much cooler in my opinion. OH! I’m still at work, um, here...” The girl reached into her apron and gave him a little note.

“I hope we get to talk again soon, bye Washio!” Before he could even say goodbye the girl had pranced back to the kitchen.

Looking down at the note she gave him he could feel the blush on his cheeks but he didn’t care.

Because written on the note was the girls number, ‘xxx-xxx-xxxx, <3 call me~’ he smiled, he for sure was gonna call her later.

Before he could put the note away however he noticed the writing at the bottom.

...Now he knew why she looked so familiar.

Because signed at the bottom was, in adorably messy handwriting, ‘Yui Bokuto’.

Oh boy.

Konoha Akinori: 

Konoha had been chilling at home when his younger sister, who was a first year at Fukurodani had come home, announcing she had brought a friend home.

Standing up from his place on the couch he stopped in his tracks. In front of him was the prettiest girl he had ever seen.

She had medium length dark brown hair and beautiful gray eyes, she was taller than most females, around 5′6 would be his guess, but she was still a few inches shorter than him.

Looking at her, she looked...familiar? He didn’t really know where she seemed familiar from, school maybe?

He shrugged it off, deciding it wasn’t something worth driving him crazy.

She introduced herself (his sister introduced her really, the girl was pretty shy) as Momo, he didn’t catch the last name though.

Anywho as the afternoon went on the girls remained down in the living room doing homework, which they needed help with. Luckily Konoha was a few years ahead and had already gone through that, so he helped them with their homework.

Seeing as it was the middle of the year and mid terms were coming up, the girls would ask him for help a lot.

Now, he may not have the best track record of helping others (...i.e Bokuto with spiking *cOuGh couGh). But this was his little sister! And it definitely wasn’t because he had a *little* crush on Momo...definitely not...Okay maybe.

But it’s not like she didn’t have just as bi of a crush on him so..

Anyways, one day Konoha’s little sister, Azumi had to leave early for a doctor’s appointment but Momo still needed help.

Knowing her brother was a ~gentlemen~ and Momo didn’t have a problem with it she left the two alone.

They were both...nervous. I mean who wouldn’t be! They were both unknowingly left alone with their crush.

Konoha decided he’d just start a conversation, and with that conversation the two found out they actually had a lot in common!

Konoha found out she had an older brother, who also went to Fukurodani! She didn’t mention a name though..Oh well.

The two spent the afternoon chatting and getting to know each other! And he may or may not have gotten her number...For studying purposes of course!

At about 4:47 there was a knock at the door. “Oh, that’s probably my older brother!” Konoha nodded, but walked over to check.

He opened the door...”wASHIO!?!  What are you doing here?” The middle blocker looked just as shocked. “I’m here to pick up my little sister...” Konoha just about felt the color drain out of his face.

. . .He had a crush on Washio Tatsuki’s little sister. . . 

Oh he was dead. 

Kita Shinsuke: 

It was during lunch one day when a 2nd year had approached him, Reina Omimi.

She was very pretty with long silky black hair, slanted gray eyes standing out to him but what caught his eye the most was the cute smile on her face.

She asked him to tutor her, since she was having trouble in English, he agreed asking her to come to class 3-7 after school since he didn’t have volleyball practice.

So, the two started meeting each other after school on the days he didn’t have volleyball practice and she was free from her club activities.

He truly thought it was a coincidence.

I mean, sure there were similarities beyond their names but couldn’t have been that rare right? Besides it’s not like everyone with the same last name was related.

Anyways, soon enough the two had gotten so close, they started dating!

They had yet to meet each others families, not on purpose of course! It just didn’t seem like the biggest priority on top of everything else going on.

One day before practice the boys were in the locker room changing from their school uniforms into their practice clothes.

All was fine until *Atsumu* just had to bring something up..

“Say, Kita, I saw you with a girl the other day, who was it?” 

Kita, being unbothered by the question answered, “My girlfriend” the whole locker room went quiet before erupting in a chorus of ‘wHaT?!’, ‘who is it’ and other unintelligible things.

“Her names Reina, she’s in class 2-6 so I doubt any of you second years know her.” That instantly shut up the rambunctious (minus Suna) second years (Suna and Osamu are 2-1, Ginjima and Atsumu are class 2-3...).

...But it did intrigue a certain 3rd year.

“Shinsuke...what’s her last name?” The captain in question turned to the third year middle blocker.

“It’s Omimi, wh-...oh.” Realization hit him like a truck.

The name, the hair, the eyes, the brains...how didn’t he see it?!?!

After Omimi assured Kita he was fine with him dating her, the team got on with practice. 

But let’s just say it was a fun conversation to be had between Kita and both Omimi’s...

Suna Rintaro: 

To be fair, NO ONE knows how this happened!

SUNA doesn’t even know how this happened!

Anyways, Suna had been going for a walk (his parents had kicked him out of the house for the day for being lazy) when he bumped into her, Megumi Kita.

He recognized the name when she introduced herself, but he didn’t put two and two together.

Kita had brought her to practice about a week or so ago and had introduced her but Suna had been asleep in the club room so..

Anyways, megumi had been on her way home from the store when she and Suna collided.

Seeing as it was his fault and he wasn’t allowed back in the house yet anyways he offered to help her bring the groceries to her house.

When they got there they were immediately greeted by Yumie Kita (Kita’s grandmother), who insisted Suna stay until he could go back home. (*and her granddaughter was single and he is a very handsome young man)

Not being able to turn down the sweet elderly woman he gratefully agreed. The afternoon went on smoothly.

A few hours after his exile his mom texted him telling him he could go back home.

Wanting the two to spend more time together Yumie insisted Megumi go back with Suna, and to meet her older brother on the way back since he was nearby.

The walk was filled with playful banter and getting to know each other.

So when they got to Suna’s house he obviously asked if she’d see him again and she happily agreed.

It wasn’t until he tried to sleep that night he remembered why that name had sounded so familiar.

Fast forward two months, Megumi and Suna were happily dating, er happily dating in secret. Why? Because the two knew Kita would not be happy to know someone (from his team nonetheless) was dating his little sister.

It was during practice one day that the fateful encounter had occurred...Suna had mysteriously disappeared, and Kita’s little sister who had come to watch had disappeared as well...The team went on a scavenger hunt for the sleepy middle blocker, figuring the sister’s absence was just a coincidence.

Until they found them snuggled up and asleep in the stairwell...

Suna did a few extra drills that practice...

And for 5 practices after that.

Ushijima Wakatoshi: 

Okay...to be completely fair...he knew she was Oikawa’s little sister.

He met her at the beginning of his second year when she became the first year manager at Shiratorizawa.

Due to her sweet and kind personality, which he found greatly contrasted Oikawa’s he took a strong liking to the girl one she returned.

At first the two were just friends but as they spent more time together they developed feelings for each other.

Despite not going to the same school, and Natsuki staying in the dorms the Oikawa siblings remained close.

So Oikawa knew she went to Shiratorizawa...and that she was their manager...he just didn’t think she even TALKED to Ushijima.

Let alone that she was DATING him!

N E wAys Ushijima and Natsuki were out on a date, it was a Saturday and the two were out and about in town.

The two had just exited the café they were in when they heard a loud gasp.

Turning around the two were met with....basically all of Aoba Johsai.

And a broad range of reactions.

Oikawa looked DiSgUsTeD, iwaizumi looked conflicted, Yahaba showed a *hint* of surprise, Kindaichi looked scared and Hanamaki, Matsukawa and Kunimi were all laughing at their captain.

“wha-why-how-hUH!?!?! HOW DID THIS HAP-” He was promptly cut off by a firm slap to the back of his head. “Get over yourself loserkawa! You should’ve known you couldn’t control her forever!” 

Whining from the blow to the back of his head Oikawa turned to face the love birds, staring down Ushijima and proceeding to look his little sister in the eye.

After much mental deliberation (and another hit from Iwaizumi) he sighed and turned around, waving a dramatic hand in the air.

As he walked away he shouted, “Oh~ But don’t think you’re getting off easy now Ushiwaka,” He momentarily stopped to turn his head and give the two a *look. “We will be discussing this later.”

Yahaba Shigeru: 

 After a game ended he was headed towards the locker room when someone stopped him.

She introduced herself as Emi and said she wanted to say he played really well.

Yahaba, thinking she was really sweet and cute asked for her number which she gladly gave to him.

As he walked to the locker room, he couldn’t stop thinking about her beautiful long black hair that was perfectly curly. 

She really was quite pretty, one of the prettiest girls he’d ever seen.

Fast forward a week, he had asked the girl on a date and she’d said yes!

So now, he was headed to an address she had given him to pick her up.

She was running a bit late so she told him to knock on the door and her older brother would let him in.

Making sure he looked his best he got out of his car and knocked on the front door.

He almost choked when none other than his teammate, Matsukawa opened the front door confused as to why Yahaba was there.

To stunned to answer coherently, Mattsun’s little sister skipped past her brother and gave Yahaba a hug, explaining to her brother this was the guy she had been talking about.

...Yahaba knew he was in for it later when he saw the look Matsukawa was giving him...it was the same look he had perfected as a middle blocker.

Y’know, the one he used to intimidate his opponents.

Nervously gulping Yahaba promised to have her home at a reasonable time and nervously left with his date.

The next practice was a dreaded date for the poor man.

Iwaizumi Hajime: 

Iwaizumi had been racing the halls of Aoba Johsai (he was late to practice...) when he had accidentally bumped into someone, sub sequentially knocking them to the ground.

Looking down he saw that he had bumped into a girl he had seen around, Kanna something or the other.

Apologizing he was quick to offer her a hand up, which she gratefully accepted.

He helped her gather her things and discovered she was on her way to deliver some papers to the guidance office.

Seeing as he was responsible for them being knocked to the floor he offered to help her take them there.

On their way to the office Iwaizumi made some small talk and got to know somethings about the girl.

He knew the name ‘Kyotani’ but he didn’t think anything of it especially since she was so nice and sweet!

So he figured it was a coincidence the two had the same name.

After that day the two would meet for study sessions, lunch, etc. Until they eventually started to go on dates.

So when he asked her to be his girlfriend, she had agreed.

On this specific day the two had plans to hang out after school, but because of a quick team meeting after practice Iwaizumi would be late to pick Kanna up after her club.

She assured him it was fine and that she’d just meet Iwaizumi at the gym.

“The HECK are you doin’ here?” Iwaizumi turned from where he was chatting with Hanamaki to see his girlfriend had just walked into the gym.

“Shut up Kentaro! Oh, Hajime! Sorry if I’m a bit early, club ended sooner than I had expected.”

Iwaizumi walked over and gave his girlfriend a short kiss on the lips, which wasn’t that weird since they’ve been dating for a few months now and had kissed several times.

“Are you serious? Right in front of my salad?” The whole gym (minus one player) cracked up at Makki’s joke, Iwaizumi rolling his eyes.

“Chill out everyone, this is my girlfriend, Kanna-” “GiRLfRiEnD!?!”

The team now directed their eyes towards Kyotani, who was a mix between fuming and shocked.

“Oh shut it Kentaro! You knew I had a boyfriend.” Kanna rolled her eyes at her overprotective younger brother. He sputtered a bit before he could formulate a response, “yEah, but I didn’t know it was him!”.

Before young Mad-dog exploded Yahaba came over and dragged him by the collar back to the court to ‘practice his spikes’ or whatever.

Futakuchi Kenji: 

He swears it was an accident! 

How was he supposed to know she was Aone’s little sister?!

Futakuchi had gone over one afternoon to work on some homework with Aone.

When Futakuchi knocked on the door, a beautiful kind looking girl opened it, asking him why he was here.

Introducing himself as a friend of Aone’s, the girl let him in, figuring he was  friend of her brothers.

You see, before Futakuchi had come over that afternoon, Aone had warned him his younger sister had some friends over.

So naturally he assumed the girl who answered the door was one of those friends since the girl (whose name he learned was Niko) and Aone looked absolutely nothing alike!

She was also quite bubbly and extroverted, easily keeping conversation with the girl.

Being the absolute charmer he is he begun lightly flirting with the girl.

And IN HIS DEFENSE!! She flirted back.

IT WAS ALSO AT THIS TIME THAT AONE HAD COME DOWNSTAIRS.

A look of concern came over his face as he saw Futakuchi flirting with his little sister. 

Quickly walking over to the two, he pushed Futakuchi away (by his face of course) before turning to his younger sister who was frantically asking why he’d do such a thing.

“You know that guy on the team I always talk about.” Niko looked at him confused, “You mean the scummy one with a terrible personality?” Aone nodded and pointed at Futakuchi, “He’s that guy.” 

Futakuchi just yelled out a “HEY!”, knowing his friend wasn’t exactly wrong.

Niko just laughed, “He’s not that bad! He seems nice to me! Plus you never mentioned he was so handsome.”

Making a face of disgust Aone just shook his head muttering ‘It’s your funeral’ before heading back to his room.

The two hit it off, and despite his initial protests Aone is very happy for both of them.

Daishou Suguru: 

It was after Mika dumped him, he had been incredibly distraught and had gone to a local park to let his feelings out.

Unfortunately, it had started raining and Daishou hadn’t exactly been in the right state of mind so he had forgotten to bring an umbrella.

Just as it had started to sprinkle he had gotten shielded from the rain,

Looking up he saw a really pretty girl with black hair and warm gray eyes looking at him with concern.

Convincing him it was dangerous to be out in this weather, the two made their way to the safety of a nearby café.

The two talked for hours and as it turns out the girl, Yuna as he had learned her name was, had been going through a similar situation.

Exchanging numbers the two continued to see each other and eventually started dating.

They had yet to meet each other’s families due to both of them being busy, so they decided to wait until after the Spring High Preliminary’s since Daishou would be free after them. (Due to scheduling conflicts Yuna was not able to go to the Match, but consoled her boyfriend after they lost)

Knocking on the door Yuna let him in and the two hung out in the living room until everyone had gotten there.

Once dinner had been cooked the family sat down at the table, all except one who Yuna had said was still at practice.

About 1/4 of the way through dinner they heard the front door open, in walking Yuna’s little brother.

“Oh! I should have asked earlier but you two know each other don’t you Yuuki?” 

Daishou mentally screamed realizing his girlfriend’s younger brother just so happened to be the rookie libero he had targeted during the preliminary’s.

Stilling in his tracks Shibayama nervously shook his head, saying he had only gone up against him at the preliminary’s and that they hadn’t really met.

Seeing as Shibayama is a stand up guy, he didn’t say anything to his family. So all was actually going well until Mr. Shibayama said Daishou had looked familiar....

Yuna had not gone to the Match...but Mr. Shibayama and Mrs. Shibayama had...and they had now recognized Daishou.

Oh boy.

Numai Kazuma:

It was when Numai had dislocated his thumb.

After the match he had gone to the nurses office, where a very pretty girl helped him.

She introduced herself as Kaia, she was helping out with first aid since she was enrolled in a medical program at Nohebi.

When Numai heard ‘Nohebi’ he talked about how he was the Ace for the Boys Volleyball team.

Kaia then asked him questions and before the two knew it they were engaged in a conversation while she helped him with his injury.

The two bonded over volleyball, since Numai learned her little brother played, and he played as a wing spiker!

During the duration of his stay, he built up the courage to ask her for her number, which she of course agreed to.

Seeing as she had done as much as she could do for a dislocated thumb, she released him, opting to walk him back to his team (definitely nOt just to spend more time with him h a h a).

When they got to the club room, where the team had just finished discussing the game.

Numai opened the door a smidge before he paused, not noticing the team eagerly waiting behind the closed door.

Turning back to Kaia he took  deep breath before nervously asking the girl out sometime, which she also happily agreed to.

Little did he realize the girls reply had interested someone behind the semi-closed door, he hadn’t really cared what was going on until he recognized that voice.

When the team decided their ace had had enough fun, the quickly opened the door and pulled him inside, the whole team piling on top of him.

All except one...

“Kaia...what are you doing here..?” everyone turned to look at a now awake Kuguri, who had been napping after taking over for the poor ace.

Kaia then entered the room and gave her little brother a hug, congratulating him for stepping up.

Noticing the team’s weird stares, the eldest of the two siblings turned around before properly introducing herself.

“I’m Kaia Kuguri, Naoyasu’s older sister.”

The underclassmen went silent, since they didn’t want to seem disrespectful towards their ace, while the third years all started howling with laughter, Sakishima and Daishou being the worst offenders.

Kaia just shook her head before leaving her dumbstruck brother and a red and stuttering Numai behind to deal with his cackling teammates.

[usergreenpixel]

JACOBIN FICTION CONVENTION MEETING 2: The Black Book (1949)

1. Introduction

Welp, here it is, Citizens.

Welcome to the second meeting of the Jacobin Fiction Convention. Please, enjoy some snacks and drinks and get comfortable because we’re in for a pretty wild ride.

The review of “The Black Book” is finally here. Initially released under the title “Reign of Terror” in 1949, it acquired its second (and more famous in our community) title during its rereleases, as far as my research could tell me.

Now, before we proceed, allow me to give you some background info on the way I found this movie.

I have seen @frevandrest ‘s posts referring to it. A few other people too, but I simply don’t remember the usernames. Still, I immediately got the impression that it’s a rather infamous movie in our community so I decided to review it simply out of morbid curiosity, just to see what the fuss was about.

I found the entire thing on YouTube so it’s available for anyone curious or masochistic enough to check it out.

Let’s just say that I dropped the movie several times and the reasons for this awful impression are going to be listed below.

2. The Story

The story reeks of propaganda, which is to be expected.

Basically, The Evil Misogynistic Gay Pigeon Boi Not Yet Dictator ™️ Robespierre wants to become, well, the dictator of France.

Problem is, apparently only Barras can appoint him as the dictator and that guy is in hiding, refusing to comply. And to make things worse, the titular book, Robespierre’s personal death list of sorts, has vanished.

Robespierre believes that he cannot control the Convention without the book and summons Duval, the butcher prosecutor from Strasbourg, to locate the death list in 24 hours. Unbeknownst to him, Duval gets replaced by one Charles D’Aubigny, who is eager to stop Robespierre...

Yes, Citizens, they attempted to make a thriller/detective story of sorts, which isn’t a bad idea. If my prompts are any indication, there’s a lot of genres that fit the setting of the French Revolution. In fact, I would love to read a good detective story set in this era.

The keyword here is ‘good’ though, and, unfortunately, this movie simply didn’t cut it for me as a detective story.

(Spoilers ahead!)

In all honesty, it’s actually quite predictable in its execution. Personally, I predicted rather quickly that the book wasn’t actually stolen and it was a distraction move.

The complete lack of logic in the actions of this Robespierre and the ridiculous levels of seriousness also were really painful to watch and kept breaking any potential immersion on my part.

For instance, Robespierre’s method of controlling the Convention is not telling who is and who is not on the list.

Now, in Real Life ™️, this hardly stopped the Thermidorians but apparently that’s not the case in the movie! Nobody even tries to speak up against him or, you know, quietly assassinate him to prevent him from getting all the power, which is hardly realistic if you ask me.

I also feel like this plot line of Charles and Madelon (the female lead) being these bitter exes is boring and really done to death. It’s actually one of my least favorite tropes and I would rather prefer them to simply have a professional relationship (because yes, men and women can have platonic relationships), like old acquaintances who went on a spying mission that one time or something similar.

This romantic subplot was really shoehorned into the story in my opinion and I do believe that it would’ve been more tolerable with only the main plot left in the final script, but oh well.

3. The Characters

Once again, boring is the best adjective I can come up with. Fouché felt less out of character than the others though, which is not a good sign.

Madelon is the femme fatale mixed with damsel in distress and Charles is the stereotypical single detective character. That’s about it. They’re both just walking clichés.

Anyway, since the OCs are kind of archetypical and blander than oatmeal without milk, let’s discuss the historical figures.

Robespierre is once again stereotypical, but I find it funny that his HQ are connected to a bakery and his scene with pigeons near the beginning is surprisingly accurate in the sense of the “he likes pigeons” tidbit. I don’t know if the creators did any research on this but it’s a nice detail nonetheless.

And now let’s talk about Saint-Just in this mess. He is ridiculously and cartoonishly evil, kicks kittens to prove it, giggles and grins like me when I write something funny in my chapters and is incredibly dumb. Also, he sounds and acts like he belongs in a Western, not in this kind of movie.

Fouché is...well, Fouché, believe it or not. Opportunistic, cruel, a backstabber and he turns on Robespierre so he is not as out of character as the others. He also makes a face similar to an owl or that “You don’t say” meme. His almost friendly banter with Charles is pretty entertaining though, I’ll give him that.

4. The Setting

The authors didn’t do their homework here properly. I’m not an expert but most outfits don’t fit that epoch and a lot of names are butchered when they’re pronounced. Danton and Marie-Antoinette in particular suffer from that, but so does SJ.

I know that the Internet was not a thing yet but it baffles me that apparently the creators couldn’t bother to consult native French speakers? Dig up information about the time period in archives? Look at portraits? Read books? You know, the usual parts of ❇️ research ❇️. Apparently, they couldn’t and it really shows.

The backgrounds are better in this department, but nothing particularly impressive here either.

5. The Acting

A+ for effort I guess. Look, guys, people trash actors a lot but I think that here they tried their best with what they had so props for that. The over-the-top acting and the extensive seriousness even made this boredom fest kind of funny to watch at times so I’m going to give it credit where credit is due.

6. The Conclusion

All in all, a pretty bad and boring movie filled with propaganda, clichés, flat characters but also occasional unintentionally funny and cartoonish moments sprinkled in.

If you’re into bad movies, I won’t stop you from watching it but I highly recommend you to do something else with your free time if you’re looking for an actually good movie.

This concludes today’s meeting of the Jacobin Fiction Convention. Stay tuned for updates, Citizens, and stay safe!

Love,

- Citizen Green Pixel

[hawkland]

Destiel fic recs (round #4) + commentary

Time for another (mostly) Destiel fic rec round-up post before my bookmarks get out of control! This one’s a mix of longer and some shorter fics (or series thereof), no particular theme except I guess a lot of angst, hurting Cas, and all the other things that tickle my Id. Several Season 9 human!Cas divergence fics, plus some later season angst-fests and rewrites.

In the Shadow of your Wings by Enochian Things (Salr323) (52k) The first of two fics by this author which I absolutely fell in love with! Canon-divergence from the end of Season 11. Cas finds himself blasted to Naples, Italy by the banishing sigil in the bunker and he stumbles — almost literally — into a sexy, delightful Italian Man of Letters, Luca. When he makes his way back to the bunker and finds Dean still alive, he tries to confess his feelings but Dean panics and shuts him down. Cas goes back in Italy soon thereafter and ends up beginning a relationship with Luca, much to Dean’s chagrin. Meanwhile Sam is still missing and it turns out there may be some dangerous individuals who are out for Cas more so than even the Winchesters. 

I loved everything about this fic so much - Luca is an amazing OC, the Naples and London locations are wonderfully evoked and took me straight back to places I’d been. The angst, the pacing, the plotting and the eventual Dean/Cas getting together are all amazing and this is definitely on my re-read in the future list.

The rest of my recs below the cut!

My heart is beating from me by Enochian Things (Salr323) (55k) The other fic by this author that I literally inhaled in one day! Season 9 Human!Cas canon divergence. It’s been months since Sam and Dean have heard from Cas, and when they do, it’s in the form of a wedding invitation. Cas is getting married to Daphne - the woman who “rescued” him and named him Emmanuel when he’d lost all his memories post-Leviathans. It seems Cas went back to her while on his own and they’ve rekindled their relationship...whatever it is. Dean just knows something isn’t right about her, so he sets out to investigate and try to figure out WTF Cas is doing before it’s too late. 

This story is so, so good! The case Dean gets Cas to come along on is unique and provides a neat investigation subplot, but what’s so especially wonderful is the explanation the author gives of who Daphne really is — and why she’d been so cool about just having a strange man with no memories move in to be her “husband” (and then want to marry him for real a couple years later, after he’d vanished from her life!) In fact it’s so brilliant I’m basically accepting it as my Daphne headcanon from now on and I don’t want to spoil it. The fic is also great in exploring Cas still struggling with understanding human emotions, customs and etiquette, Sam is A Very Good Friend, and Dean is, well, Dean. (I’m just sad this author hasn’t written more SPN fics because what they have is just brilliant.)

The wilderness. by orange_crushed (8k) Wonderful, shorter Season 9 canon divergence fic by an author who consistently makes me happy. Human!Cas leaves the bunker with a few things to get off the ground from Dean and directions to connect with Garth...but he ditches that plan to try to find his way on his own. It’s wonderfully detailed about the basic struggles of survival, finding work, making ends meet and trying to make some new friends...and why it’s important for him to prove he can make it on his own before he’s willing to welcome Dean (back) into his life.

I Through My Window See by deHavilland (26k) This is an interesting one, written well before we had canon human!Cas in Season 9. Canon-divergence in which Cas remains human after they avert the apocalypse in Season 5. Sam and Dean set him up in an apartment in Sioux Falls and then...just kind of abandon him there. He spends most of a year just barely existing before a visit from Sam finally stirs him out of his inertia and depression, to eventually get a job and also start hunting on his own. This is an interesting read, if just to see an author exploring the idea of human!Cas abandoned by Dean a few years before it actually...ended up becoming canon! I love how Cas is written in this (it’s a story much like the next one on my list that I thought does an amazing, realistic job of capturing what depression feels like), but I do have some issues with Dean. It’s never fully resolved or explained why Dean was being such an ass so I honestly wasn’t totally sold on the ending - I wanted some more out of Dean, some more explanation or apology or something. It’s a story that would have been great to have a sequel from Dean’s POV but after all this time, that will just have to exist in my brain, I suppose! Still worth a read because it’s excellently written, Cas becomes totally bad ass again by the end and it’s always fun to read early SPN fic speculating on future developments.

I Shall Not Want by domesticadventures (20k) I found myself inhaling a bunch of wonderful short ficlets by this author the other day, but this is the one I had to stop at to rec. It’s another Season 9 divergence fic, of a sort - Cas is newly human, for the sake of the story there’s no Abbadon to worry about, Sam is healed...and Sam wants to move out and get on with his own life. Cas and Dean are both struggling with adapting to their new lives and it’s a hauntingly rich and stark portrayal of depression, inertia, and the slow healing process of accepting and adapting to change. I also liked that this story gives us a Dean who is a little more aware of his feelings for Cas and they both struggle to reach out to each other - for once it’s not sexuality causing a crisis of identity but all the other shit they are coping with.

Don't Sing Love Songs by ireallydidthistomyself (17k). I’m not normally a big fan of baby/toddler!Jack fics - I like the angst that he was forced to grow up too quickly, and in general I’m not big on kid!fic in fandom. This author’s work is a big exception to that. They’ve written several stories along a similar theme: Cas raising Jack on his own/in secret for years, Dean only finding them or coming back into their lives later on. But this is the version of that idea that really packed the most punch for me and was incredibly emotionally satisfying. Dean finds Cas after 6 years, where he’s kept Jack mostly isolated and safe from the world. But with Dean allowed back into his life, Cas may be inviting grave danger upon Jack as well. This one ripped my heart out but managed to make it all better by the end.

Better Ways to Kill Our Time by always_a_birthday_girl (8k) I don’t know why I torture myself reading Dean-in-the-Ma’lak-box AUs, but I do. I think because it’s pretty much my biggest nightmare/horror and for some reason it’s cathartic while terrifying? Anyway here’s one where Dean goes through with his plan, Cas crashes and burns for most of a year, until Dean finally starts doing what he promised he wouldn’t: praying to him. Cas figures out a way to communicate back and over the distance, they manage to have certain conversations they should have years before. It’s painful but lovely and there is a happy ending, so it’s well worth the read!

Time Flows Like Water and We're Drowning by triedunture (7.9k) A little break from the later-seasons stuff I (mostly?) read, featuring a seriously hot (but angsty) Cas/Endverse!Cas/Dean threesome. When Zacariah’s plan to show Dean the future doesn’t change his mind about taking on his “responsibility”, he sends Endverse!Cas back in time to try to convince Cas instead, showing him what he’s to become. I don’t think Zac expected it to turn into a threesome, but it’s hot and beautiful and sad and wonderful all at once. 

hachikireru by vaudelin  (23k) At one point I went on a wallow-fest of reading a bunch of sad 14x20-15x03 divorce-arc fics. Just to hurt myself more, I guess. I know this fic’s been recced around a lot (at least on fail_fandomanon) and I can see why! After leaving the bunker, Cas ends up in Sioux Falls to visit Claire. She’s busy tracking down leads to find Kaia’s killer and he decides to go along with her on one such hunt. But what they find is an unexpected supernatural threat targeting those with broken hearts. Well. I think you know where that might be leading. This is a wonderful casefic with lots of character moments between Cas & Claire and then Cas & Dean, working through their pain and angst and just...it’s a very satisfying read.

Moriah Codas: A Trilogy by Toomanyfandoms99 (11k total) A series of 3 shorter fics spinning off the events of 14x20, developing a slightly divergent universe the author’s written where Cas does have his wings back and has helped resurrect a few of the angels (Balthazar, Gabriel, and Samandriel in particular). This series is absolutely heartbreaking — Cas is completely broken by Jack’s loss, has “fallen out of love” with Dean after he was ready to kill Jack, and sees no way back to what he’d had and felt before. He’s determined to just let the Empty take him...but not until he and his assembled squad of “avenging angels” clean up the mess Chuck has created, smiting zombies and taking out super-powered monsters across North America. 

Cas’s motorcycle gang/angel squad is so fucking awesome (I want a happy fic where they do this!) and this is BAMF!Cas at his finest. I just have to include a quote:

He set down the empty glass, and Gabriel said, “well, dearly beloved, we have gathered here today to kick some zombie ass. Since they have chosen to amass in Carthage, we are here to take out as many as we can without causing this town to flip the fuck out. Are we in agreement?”

“I expect,” Balthazar grinned, “a full-on bar brawl. Do not disappoint me.”

“Cassie, Driel,” Gabriel addressed the duo, “how are we with weapons?”

“I have enough machetes in a storage facility uptown to film a Jackie Chan movie,” Castiel said.

But it’s also utterly and completely heartbreaking, so don’t read this one if you need a happy ending. If you do read, check out the author’s other later-season coda fics and fic series as they are all really great.

to mend what is not broken by gothyringwald (2.6k) This last short one I’ve mentioned before, but I just have to rec it again! It was my gift for the 2021 Hurt Comfort Gift Exchange and it’s everything I wanted, and more. Sweet and caring Dean, wounded but still prideful Cas, and some lovely wing!kink/wing!care that pushes all of my button just right.

Anyway, that’s it for now as I think this is long enough. If you enjoy my recs, could you let me know? I try to not just list titles but give some commentary...as it helps me re-find stories I enjoyed the most, too!

[cosmiciaria]

Assasin’s Creed III Remaster review - Spoilers! - Long post!

I wanted to keep this spoiler free, but as this game is such a narrative experience, I don't think I'll be able to. I'll try to keep them at minimum, but be warned: there are major spoilers ahead. By the way, this game is almost a decade old, so y'all had plenty of time to get spoiled beforehand. And if you're reading this, it's because you like this game and you probably know how it ends.

Review under the cut because this is way too long. 

As always, I express my feelings and impressions regarding my experience with a game – I write it because I like writing reviews instead of, I don't know, recording a video for YouTube. I'm not a YouTuber and I feel safer behind a keyboard where people don't point out about my weird accent (the accent every Hispanic person has when they speak English). Since the pandemic started, I found refuge and comfort in AC games, with Syndicate being my first contact with the franchise, and Unity solidifying my love for it. I found strength and weaknesses in all the installments I've played, which are almost all of them by now (excluding the first AC with Altaïr, the new saga with Origins, Odyssey and Valhalla, and Rogue). I've also platinumed three of those games I've played, and I'm on my way to platinum this one, so I think I can speak from a deep fan standpoint by now.

Since Syndicate, I studied from up close each of the protagonists of the mainline games. I felt drawn to Arno because he looked like one of my oc's (and his girlfriend looked like my oc's girlfriend as well); I wanted to learn about Ezio because he's a fan favorite; I wasn't at all impressed by Edward but ended up growing fond of him; I respect Altaïr for what he means to the Brotherhood; but I can safely say, that I haven't felt as attracted to a main AC protagonist as I felt with Connor.

From the moment I knew he was a native American (such a bold choice, it seemed for me) I felt instant attraction – but not the, idk, physical (he's a cutie I give it to you), but because of what he could bring about as a main character. A perspective we don't usually get to see, and personally, as I'm not American, a point of view to educate me on a different side of history. I wanted to see what they could do with him as the star of the game, I wanted to play with him and understand how someone like him could rise up and become a protagonist of such a well known and beloved saga of games. I applaud this decision from Ubisoft, whether they did it because they wanted to look progressive or not, I don't care, I'll always cherish that the protagonist of a famous videogame is a Mohawk. And with the American Revolution as the main stage, no less. Such an important scenario to strengthen the virtue of independence, patriotism and love for a country, going hand in hand with a character that represents America even more than the Founding Fathers.

(Also I'm a Hamilton Fan Trademark so I couldn't stop singing random parts of songs while playing this game, it was a nightmare every time Lafayette appeared on screen because I JUST HAD TO start mumbling Guns and Ships)

I lunged blindly into this game – I'd only spoiled myself the very ending because I played Black Flag before – so imagine my surprise when I first saw Haytham, Connor's father, as the main protagonist.

So here's the deal. Let's clear this out of the way.

I thoroughly enjoyed the game. It was what I expected and more.

But.

Yes, there's always a but in AC games, you know the drill.

As I kept playing with Haytham, charming though he was, I kept thinking to myself "ok but when does Connor come into play". I also already knew Haytham was a Templar, so the end of the first few sequences didn't catch me by surprise – actually, what caught me by surprise was that there was no mention of Assassins or Templars during the "prologue" with Haytham, instead you're left to believe they're all Assassins until he prays to the Father of Understanding and you realize with a gasp "oH NoO!".

You play with Haytham the first three sequences. One of these have the most memories out all of the sequences more or less. This whole thing can take up to three to five hours depending on how much time you wish to put into exploring or completing the optional objectives. And still no signs of Connor.

Connor does come eventually – as a child – by sequence 4. It's not until the end of sequence 5 that you get to play as (almost) adult Assassin Connor, so maybe five or six or even seven hours into the game and you're barely starting.

I know what they did here. I understand. And this is what I meant when I said they were going for a 'narrative experience'. To make you play as Haytham before, to lure you into a false sense of safety believing he was an Assassin working for a just cause, to make you feel invested in his relationship with Ziio – only to discover he's one of the bad guys, that will eventually give birth to our true hero of the game – it sediments everything perfectly. It tells you everything you need to know to understand these characters and their motivations. I can see where they're going and some of it can be quite predictable, but it was done right. On the narrative aspect at least.

I got used to Haytham by the time we switch to Connor, we're used to his cloak and his three pointed hat – his accent, his sassiness, his everything. You grow fond of him and you think, hey, maybe it isn't so bad to not play as Connor, I can roll with this – until the sudden change happens. The game completed its purpose: let you know and care for Haytham, only to strip him away from your hands and bring you the real protagonist with an interesting background that didn't need to be told, but it was instead shown to us players. What a better way to tell a story.

But the problem is – most of Haytham's memories are fillers. For starters, the very first memory where you appear in the opera house (similar to that one at the end of Black Flag… mmm) serves as a tutorial for climbing and killing with the hidden blade. Then the whole memory on the ship to Boston – completely expendable and removable, the story doesn't suffer from it. All the memories used with Haytham as tutorials – how to shield from an open line of fire, how to use ranged weapons, how to sneak and find stores and viewpoints, how to use horses and walk on snow, fricking Ben Franklin – everything, everything could've blended in better. You could still tell the story you wanted in only one sequence playing with Haytham, and end it the way it does end in sequence 3, without avoiding any important detail to frame Connor's backstory as well – but instead, this part with Haytham does feel like it overstays its welcome, and by the end you're just hoping it ends soon, it drags on for too long, and there's no real sense of thread pulling the strings together here, everything just kind of 'happens'.

But the never-ending prologue doesn't end there (badam tum tsss), because Connor still isn't an Assassin. Connor is not Connor actually, as I had been led to believe prior to playing this game: his real name is Ratonhnhaké:ton, which I wish it was used more often than it was. Ratonhnhaké:ton is like four or five years old when you first play with him, and his village is assaulted by what we assume are Charles Lee's men, a Templar and companion to Haytham. Ratonhnhaké:ton swears revenge upon these putrid British invaders and he grows up resenting the death of his mother, who died in the fire provoked by these Templars.

Not even knowing what a Templar or an Assassin is, Ratonhnhaké:ton is sent by one of "the spirit guides" (actually, Juno, one of the Precursor people) to seek the Brotherhood. When he's around 14, he sets out of his village into the wide world and finds Achilles, who will become his Assassin mentor – that is, after completing a set of tasks that yet again seem to go on forever. Ratonhnhaké:ton turns into Connor to cover his true origins, a name I thought it was random, but by the end I realized how wrong I was.

It isn't until Connor turns 17 that he becomes a fully-fledged Assassin – and you might think, well, Ezio became an Assassin at the same age – yes, but it didn't take him five sequences to reach there. I can't believe I'm defending Ezio.

It's not that I didn't enjoy playing as Connor when he was a kid, no, and I also don't think that part of the game should be skipped since it shows his people, family and friends – maybe comprised, yes, into only one sequence – the real problem here is the fact that first you need to play what could be considered the longest prologue ever, even longer than Kingdom Hearts 2's one, and you're teased with grasping the real protagonist but no, because there's still more 'prologue' to cover with Connor's rise to the Brotherhood. The real, real story, begins in sequence 6, and even then you still have a lot of tutorials to listen from the NPC on duty.

And if you do the maths – you're halfway through the game – halfway! – and you're just starting. The game has twelve sequences and the meat of the plot is on the last six. Then, why did I play all the previous parts?

For the 'narrative experience' thing I talked about. They wanted to lay the groundwork for a better, compelling storytelling, and I can appreciate it, but not when it hinders the pace of the game this way.

That is, certainly, my biggest issue with the game. The pace. If you're going to give me such a slow start, introducing characters non-stop, and only give me resolutions, discoveries and action packed sequences on the later half, then the story isn't balanced at all – I understand that at some points you need to slow down and sink in what's going on; you can't also introduce ten characters in one cutscene because that's just bad story telling – but the memories of this game are clearly not well organized and weren't thought with the player in mind, but rather with the story in mind. To think that the first mission you do as a full Assassin is to receive more and more tutorials on how the fast travel points work and how you can lower your notoriety (as far as gameplay goes in this mission, it's only walking around at a slug's pace to follow the NPC giving you instructions) it does feel like a slap in the face after all the things and hours and effort you put into it to finally reaching this point (which, I remind you, it's by sequence six!).

It's at this point where I can't blame people for not following through with this game. I have plenty of friends who abandoned it even before reaching this part. And I found myself having trouble to return to it: I only wanted to go back to it because I knew I had to like Connor, I knew he wouldn't disappoint me as a character.

Boy, was I RIGHT!

Now, to be honest, I may be biased, like I said: I was instantly attracted to Connor due to his backstory and I wished to see what he could bring to the table. And I have to say, he didn't disappoint me at all.

Maybe you know or maybe you don't, but up until this point, my fave Assassin was Arno: he showed weaknesses and he suffered the consequences of his actions, to the point of no return, that rendered him vulnerable and a mere human being. And I love me a good vulnerable character who knows their limits and strives to get out of that pit. I love me a good, compelling character that has growth and agency and isn't made of cardboard or has a one-dimensional personality. And Connor delivered on this front.

Connor might very well be my new fave Assassin. I'm sorry, Arno. I still love you babe. But Connor… I never found myself rooting for a character more than I did with him. I wanted him to succeed, I wanted his people to be saved, I wanted to see his ideals become a reality – and he's got so much agency, he's a storm when he comes into a scene, his naivety mixed with the brutality of his killings, the simplicity of his reasonings – he's an idealist, and he fights for it, whether we like it or not, and that devotion to his own creed is at least respectable, let alone admirable. He's never downplayed for his upbringing or his ethnicity, he works among the most notorious people as if he was another one of them, he's well respected in his community, he shows kindness and always offers a helping hand to those in need, but never doubts to plunge his blade into this opponent's throats, fearlessly, he doesn't mind telling George Friking Washington to shut the hell up and not follow him because he'll kill him (there's such a pleasure in a native reprimanding enslaver Washington) – he's, simply put, a great hero.

I've seen many complain that he's boring, or that the actor who played him, Noah Watts, delivered lines in an emotionless way – the only thing that could make him 'boring' is the fact that he's not a lady's man like Ezio was, and to my eyes that's a plus. He speaks slowly and modulates well in English because that's not his mother tongue, and I can appreciate when a company puts these little details, like his way of speaking changing throughout the game as he gained more confidence with this new language he was learning to use. As non-English native speaker, I certainly can commune with the feeling of adapting my tongue and my brain to a new language, and I also know that I speak weirdly to those who are native, maybe I don't have the same intonations, and maybe I sound emotionless as well, who knows, but I can't think of a better portrayal of a non-English character speaking English in videogames than this one. They remained faithful to his culture, and even though I noticed Noah didn't speak Mohawk as fluently as English, I can still feel pleased with the fact that Connor speaks in his mother tongue in all of the scenes he interacts with Mohawks (that's something they did better here than in Unity, where not a single character has even a French accent. I switched the language spoken to French in my subsequent playthroughs, much to my disappointment, because I really liked the Canadian actors). I know subtitles may seem threatening to some, but I wish they did this more often: deliver more lines in the original language of each of the protagonists. It shows care and respect. And I think this game excels at respect.

So, yes, I liked Ratonhnhaké:ton, as you can see. Maybe a lot. Too much.

I also really, really enjoyed his relationship with Haytham.

When Haytham appears back in to the fray it's when the plot picks up. Their interactions are gold: I love the rivalry, I love that Haytham is constantly testing his son, and I love the tiny bits that may show or make us believe that Haytham has a soft spot for him – I love that we never truly know what's going on through Haytham's mind, why does he do the things he does – but what I enjoyed the most about these two fighting together is the fact that they represent opposing forces, a clash of interest, and they bring back the concept of the blurred line between the Templars and the Assassins, their different methods. Haytham represents the collectiveness of the Templars, through him we learn of what they truly uphold as right and just, and behind some of his reasonings you can see sense and understanding – you comprehend his goals, you get to know your enemy, your antagonist, which is something, for instance, the Ezio trilogy lacks (because Templars bad bad pium pium die Templar bad guy) and Unity and Rogue tried to do but ultimately ended wasting its potential. I never understood Templars more than I did through Haytham, and sometimes I found myself nodding at some of his statement, like 'hey… huh… he's not that wrong about this…'. But still, we're led to believe that the good guys, the Assassins, are never wrong, so we pull through with Connor – only to realize that yes, Haytham was right in many aspects, and yes, Haytham has lied to us and he needs to be stopped.

It's here when my love for Connor reached its ultimate stage: when he denies both his father (Templars) and Washington (for whom the Assassins were working). It's here where you see the true agency of this character. It's not black or white, as Ezio's games were; it's not that he was expelled against his will from the Brotherhood like in Unity; it's not that because of a clash of interest now he resorted to the Templars, like in Rogue; no, it's the philosophy of the very first AC game with Altaïr: Templars and Assassins are one and the same, they only differ in their methods, and when Connor comes to this realization, his struggle is visible and he puts his people first. Like always.

He remains true to his personality. He's grown, he's seen the truth, but he must make a decision. And after all, we're here because we want to see him protect his people. That's his real main driving force and we root for him because of it.

Now, I've spoken a lot about our main character. But, what about the secondary ones?

Achilles, Connor's mentor, hides more than he's willing to share – but slowly his backstory unfolds. In his homestead, Davenport, you're able to build a community with different townsfolk that you can invite to live with you through special sidequests, which combine plot and gameplay seamlessly. Through the homestead missions, you get to know Achilles and the other inhabitants and you see them thrive and grow into a tight-knit community close as family. I daresay that these missions were my favorite out of the whole game, and seeing the town grow not only in NPC's walking around but also in sounds, steps, people working and laughing and dogs barking and kids playing, gave me all the fuzzy and cozy feelings of a warm blanket in winter. Most of Connor's innocence and kindness is shown through these missions, and there are also some really good jewels hidden there, like the quest that asks you to guide the pigs back inside – damn. This game gave me very good laughs.

On a gameplay level, this game is light years away from its predecessors – the parkour alone has been revamped and revitalized, making it more fluid. Free running now isn't a chore anymore. Now you can hunt, which is a great part of Connor's backstory and culture, so it's good to see they blend gameplay with plot like this. There's a crafting system that took me ages to understand, but thankfully I got the hang of it. The combat is pretty much the same (counter kills always for the win) and the difficulty remains quite easy, as the games that came before. I wasn't looking for a challenge so I'm fine with it. Now, if you're looking for a challenge… the optional objectives got it covered for you. Because, good lord, they made these stupid main missions so much unnecessarily HARDER and IMPOSSIBLE to complete without having three or four ragequits and sometimes you have to restart up to ten times. To be honest, I never found myself more enraged with the optional objectives than I was with these missions, and I thought Unity's optional constraints were stupid ass complicated, I was wrong. This game. Must be. The most. Annoying. Piece of videogame. To platinum.

Apart from the 'oh I want to die optional objectives' thing, you have naval missions – which, yes, you guessed it, take place on a ship – I guess they were testing the mechanics for a (not so far away) future pirate game, because I can see the seeds of what later Black Flag came to be. It's serviceable and it fulfills its purpose, but as I don't like ships much, I left it on hold for the endgame. 

If you don’t dig the naval missions nor the main missions, there’s plenty to do in this game: you have the aforementioned homstead missions, the club challenges (which can take... quite a while), the underground fast travel points (a nice change of pace, though you can easily grow tired of them), the liberation missions, which will see you help liberate a city from Templar control and recruiting a new Assassin apprentice, much like in Brotherhood and Revelations; taking Forts, hunting like there’s no tomorrow, courier, delivering items and message delivery missions, a ton of collectibles, etc, etc. 

You might realize I stopped talking about the plot by the time I reached sequence 6 – yes, it's because I'm a little upset with it.

I said that we're here because we want to see Connor protect his people and triumph against the Templars. Yes. We receive that, yes. Amidst. A thousand. History. Lessons.

In my Ezio's Collection review, I complained that in Revelations we were shoved history in the face – I hadn't still finished AC3, because then I would've mentioned something about it. Connor comes across all the important figures of the American Revolution in such a contrived way – he acts as a guardian angel of this revolution, aiding each of the emblematic characters that took part in. I can roll with it in my suspension of disbelief (how come this one person was present at every major event, you know), what I can't roll with is the fact that he was present at the Declaration of Independence – this is some Ken Follett level of bs of probability of something happening to a character. Besides, it's always latent though never truly explicitly addressed, but Connor's skintone was something that should've deterred him from even speaking to someone like Washington – let alone, be present at the moment they signed the Declaration. He does mention at some point that freedom and this new nation was only for white men, and that he acknowledged that slaves deserved as much freedom as everyone else was fighting for; I'm glad he addressed the elephant in the room, though I'm also glad they didn't make the whole thing about it, because normalizing a character like this as a main protagonist was the main idea, I think, when they chose a Mohawk to represent the American Revolution. Still, that someone like him was able to achieve all he achieved in a plot like this, it only means he has some kind of Main Protagonist Shield, otherwise I doubt this could've served as a realistic story for anyone else in the same situation as him. It's, uh, a little hard to believe, that's all. Whereas I can see Arno existing within the historical frame of the French Revolution, without being the one that let the guillotine fall on King Louis' head, this one was a little more far-fetched.

I haven't touched upon the Desmond part – the present day of this game is more, uh… present than ever. And I loved it! I loved it because it delved deep into the Precursor's lore, and also it fleshed out Desmond's relationship with his father, and we actually do shit with Desmond – though that part of the Brazilian stadium, huh, for a company that paid too much attention and consulted with experts on the Mohawks, they clearly left Brazil out of their investigations. I forgive them, they tried.

The music… didn't have as much personality as other installments, it was kind of there, and right now I can't evoke a single theme except for the main menu one, so there you go, it's quite forgettable for my taste, sadly.

I forgot to mention that: this game looks gorgeous. I played the Remastered version of the game, and sometimes it looked like it was done for the PS4 instead of being a remaster (it does look better than Black Flag which came afterwards!). Lighting is magical, the trees breathe life into the screen, the water effects are crystal and realistic; many times I felt like was horse-riding in a Last of Us game (yes, I just compared Ubisoft to Naughty Dog, don't hit me). Davenport Homestead is my favorite location, now more than ever, because it's not only beautiful, but it also means home.

This game accompanied me in a very important moment of my life: I sprained my ankle and I spent a week in bed recovering, while also pondering about my job and the prospects of my future; I took many decisions while playing regarding what I want for my life. I cried at the end because I realized I had become too attached to the characters and because I was so sad to see Connor keep losing things. It all comes full circle by the end. It's a very mature ending, maybe a little unfulfilling, but reality is often disappointing and not everything needs a happily ever after.

All in all, my major complaint goes to the structure of the game and the poor organization they gave to it (AND THE OPTIONAL OBJECTIVES DAAJKSDAD). But Connor as a character in itself made it all worthwhile for me. And I'll always cherish him. I know he won't resonate with everyone, but he resonated with me.

[applepi1101]

every single question with rory if you would

oh my god-

okay this is a long post I'm so sorry:

1. What’s your oc’s most irrational fear? Is there a specific reason this fear came about?

He's very afraid of going too far.. specifically when in a relationship with someone. His dad was not the best with consent and he saw how much it hurt his mom.. Rory is very careful about consent and if his partner looks even the slightest bit uncomfortable he would feel,, so bad.

2. Is your oc picky about food? What kinds of foods do they like and dislike? What do they consider a comfort or “safe” food?

He's baby he's very picky. He hates seafood. he doesn't like fish. uhhh,, he enjoys chocolate and fruity (hard)candy! also: pasta

3. What does your oc’s voice sound like? (Or, if you have one, what’s their voice claim?) Can they sing, whistle, or roll their rs? Do they have any speech impediments or notable dialects/accents?

He can sing a little, he cant do anything fancy but he has pretty good control. he can whistle really loudly and he uses it to annoy people [cough] amanda [cough]. he cant roll his rs but he will try his hardest. he sounds like alucard from Castlevania and I'm not sorry for that.

4. Is your oc good at keeping secrets?

He's pretty average at it. He tries his best but he's just as prone to slip-ups as the rest of us.

5. What kind of clothes is your oc most comfortable wearing?

He likes something comfortable when he's just hanging out in the castle. but when he has something important to do he likes to dress up a little fancy. he likes capes a lot!!

6. What kind of clothes is your oc least comfortable wearing?

probably like.. something super revealing.. he's still king and the thought of being caught out in something 'indecent' stresses him out a little. he still has a reputation to uphold.

7. What song reminds you of this oc? Does this match up with the type of music your oc likes to listen to?

World's Smallest Violin- AJR def reminds me of Rory. I think Rory would probably listen to similar music too.

8. What’s it like inside your OC's mind? (Literally, or metaphorically.)

Rory has a few worries but overall he's quite good at not letting himself get overwhelmed by things. he's genuinely full of love and it takes a lot out of him to keep all of it inside.

9. What are your oc’s goals for the future? Relationship-wise, career-wise, or other?

he kinda wants to get married. other than that he's fine with the way things are. he's definitely more of a 'in the moment' thinker. he thinks about the future when its important but he prefers to keep his mind in the present.

10. Who’s the first person your oc goes to to talk about something that made them happy? Sad? Angry?

amanda is his #1 go to. he knows that she wont judge him for anything and he's just gone to her for everything since he was a tiny little man. next would be his romantic partner and sean.

11. Does your oc have any interests/hobbies that they hide from everyone? Why do they hide these interests?

he loves collecting things!!! his favorite things to collect are probably bottle caps and coins!! he kind of only hides this because it doesn't ever come up in conversation. if you gave him a cool coin or bottle cap he would love you forever.

12. How does your oc handle talking to somebody they can’t stand? What if it’s a situation where they’re forced to work with this person?

he tries to be civil. but if they continue to piss him off then he'll become really snappy. if he's forced to work with them then he'll probably manage. he'll hate every minute of it, but he knows he has to do it.

13. What’s your oc’s dream home like?

probably something cozy. he likes the castle but it seems like so much space and a lot of it goes unused. it sounds a little silly but he kinda likes the idea of a small house in a nice neighborhood, a place he can know by heart yknow.

14. If your oc spent one day free from any consequences or recognition for their actions, how would they act?

He would probably run away lmao. not forever though, he loves his people and he would rather die than leave them with his father as their only ruler. at the moment he just has no vacation time and a day he can have just for himself would be too good for him to pass up.

15. What’s your oc’s morning routine like?

he wouldn't get up early if amanda didn't wake him up every morning. but usually around 7 or 8 he's out of bed and brushing his teeth. he has a skincare routine that i wont go into because. no. but he usually takes a while to get ready in the morning.

16. What’s your oc’s nighttime routine like?

he takes the LONGEST showers.. he likes to wait until his hair completely dries before going to bed.. so.. he usually goes to be a while after his shower :,,)

17. If your oc had a social media page, what would it be like? What would they post about? How much personal information would they feel comfortable posting on it? How often would they update it?

when he first sets up an account he would probably post about anything and everything he's interested in, after a while he would calm down a bit. he would be almost fully open about who he is online. he's well known anyway, and he has nothing to hide.

18. How does your oc see themself? How does this compare to the way other ocs see them?

He sees himself as a leader (and he is). most people would agree that he gives off 'powerful man' vibes, but the people that he's closest to know that he's just a sweetie.. he's so caring and ready to help anyone that needs it.

19. How would an enemy describe this oc?

they would probably think that he's childish. Rory is very protective of things that have been put under his protection, and he takes any loss very hard. however: Rory is good at what he does and he's always trying his best, so that might leave his enemy more than a little annoyed.

20. What’s a superpower or magical ability that this oc would hate having?

He would hate anything that involved touch.. he likes to be touchy with the people he loves so not being able to do that would upset him a lot.

21. What’s a fact you haven’t shared about this oc?

please.. this man is afraid of monkeys..

22. What’s your oc’s dream job? Is this similar to what they’re doing now? Do they believe they could ever achieve this dream?

he cant really see himself doing anything else. he was raised knowing that he was going to rule a country and he never really thought of doing something else.

23. Who would this oc consider their family? What is their relationship with these people?

his mom maybe. he hates his dad. amanda and sean are def people he considers his family. he grew up with Amanda and she's always helped him with everything. sean has been helping him out since he was fifteen and yknow. they talk about boy stuff. (also basil in that one specific au with squills mafia ocs)

24. What is one thing that, no matter who it’s coming from, would anger your oc?

Please please please, do not compare him to anyone else. he hates being compared to other people, even if its supposed to be a compliment. he spent so long being compared to his dad please just let him be his own person.

25. How does your oc handle sadness?

he doesn't get sad all that often (he usually gets angry as opposed to just.. sad..) but when he is sad he kind of.. tries to ignore it..

26. How does your oc handle anger?

he hates to admit it but he has some trouble controlling his anger... he's good at controlling his other emotions but just.. when he's angry he tends to let go of everything else and its very destructive.

27. How does your oc handle fear?

he's definitely one to ignore fear. He has a very dominant personality and his first instinct is to protect, so he finds himself ignoring his own feelings more often than not.

28. What’s your favorite thing about this oc?

he's so fun,, i love him because he just,,,, he's such a sweetie,,

29. What’s your least favorite thing about this oc?

He's probably one of my most inconsistent ocs.. his personality is somewhat unpredictable and he seems like he's always growing.. and thats a good thing but by god if it isn't hard to keep track of.

30. Tell a random fact about this oc!

he fucking loves dinosaurs.

[capricornus-rex]

A Shadow of What You Used to Be (4)

Chapter 4: Brother, Brother | Cal Kestis x Irele Skywalker

Requested by Anon

Summary: There is another! Years after young Anakin Skywalker departed Tatooine, his mother Shmi delivers a second child—this time, a daughter. Whilst the circumstance of the girl’s birth remains unexplained, Irele Skywalker has yet to choose the true path between those laid out for her.

Tags: Fem! OC, Irele Skywalker, Force-sensitive! OC, Anakin’s Younger Sister, Skywalker! OC, Darth Vader’s Secret Apprentice, Long-lost Sibling

Also in AO3

Chapters: Prelude – 1 – 2 | Previous: Part 3 | Next: Part 5 | Masterlist

5 of ?

They arrived at the moisture farm, the exact one that Watto told them. The domed abode stood out across the surrounding dunes, behind it were the suns hoisted in its point for high noon. As Anakin and Padmé approached, a dark-colored figure got into their better view—little did the Jedi knew that the figure posted outside was the droid he had created years ago.

“Oh!” startled, the droid turned around to face the visitors. “Hello, how may I be of service? I am C—”

“3PO?” Anakin squinted some more, unsure whether the sunlight was playing tricks on his already narrowed eyes.

The droid paused, its photoreceptors processing the face of the young man before him, and then it dawned on him.

“Could it be? The Maker!” the black droid exclaimed. “Master Ani, I knew you would return! Oh and Miss Padmé, oh my.”

At least Padmé was delighted to have been remembered by the droid she has not seen in a decade.

“Bless my circuits! I’m so pleased to see you both.”

“I’ve come to see my mother,” the droid’s maker said in the same steely tone he used when speaking with the Toydarian, affording no moment for the droid to celebrate this small reunion.

C3PO stuttered, unsure how to begin responding to that purpose.

“Yes, well, I do believe it is best I bring you inside.”

The droid stiffly turned around, expecting the human pair to follow, and they were escorted into the ground floor of the Lars homestead.

From the kitchen, Owen could hear C3PO speaking like a tour guide. He had figured it might have been the person he thought would come, he just didn’t realize it’d be today. Out of common courtesy, he—along with the Whitesun girl—came out of the kitchen to greet their guests.

“Master Owen, might I present to you the two most important visitors.”

“I’m Anakin Skywalker.”

“Owen Lars. And this is my girlfriend, Beru.”

Beru managed a smile to both visitors before softly saying “Hello.”

“I’m Padmé.”

“I guess I’m your stepbrother,” he swallowed. “I had a feeling you might show up someday.”

Anakin didn’t take that kindly, he had no emotional reaction to it—he’s just here for his mother.

“Is my mother here?” he demanded, stepping away from his apparent stepbrother.

“No, she’s not,” a gruff voice drew everyone’s attention to its direction, followed by the soft whirring of a hoverchair.

Cliegg had aged, though not quite well, given what had happened in the past. He extended a hand as he introduced himself.

“Shmi is my wife,” he added. “We should go inside. We have a lot to talk about.”

Owen quickly came to his father, taking the two handles protruding outward from the backrest of the chair.

“Where is your sister?”

“She hasn’t come back yet,”

“Well, she better come home quick.” Grumbled the elder Lars only within Owen’s earshot.

They all gathered at the dining table. Cliegg began with how he met Shmi, how he bought her, and eventually freed her. The old man chuckled once as he studied the boy’s features while he was listening in carefully, even while he stares at his hands clasped together.

“You know, it’s funny,” he began, the remark caught Anakin’s attention. “I never realize that you and Irele have the same eyes—but I think she resembles Shmi’s the most.”

Anakin’s eyes shifted shakily, his lips parted but no words escaped from it; he looked alternately between Cliegg and Owen, wordlessly demanding some clarification to what Cliegg said. Anakin blinked once, dramatically so, and finally managed to let out the words: “I… Irele?”

Everyone on that very table exchanged looks, but the other party was more confused and perhaps curious on who’s this Irele person that they don’t know of. Cliegg’s last words also got to Anakin and he decoded it quickly—but as he solved the minor riddle, more questions piled up after the answer. Has his mother given him a sister without his knowledge? Why hasn’t he felt her through the Force? Is she not gifted with the same abilities as he is?

“W-Where… Where is she?”

“She’s probably out in town with the other children her age. Irele is coping, you see, but I don’t think it’s not doing her much good. Overworking, finding and taking one too many odd jobs—more than she can handle—”

“Coping?” Anakin asked for elaboration.

Cliegg guessed there’s no way of sliding his way out of that question. They will come to the point in the conversation on what had happened to Shmi. The mood in the dining room changed significantly. A gloomy silence befell Owen and Beru as they waited for the head of the house to begin the tale.

“Your mother went out early—just before dawn—to pick mushrooms, like she always does. But this one time, she was ambushed by the Tusken Raiders, they had been prowling by the ridge waiting to raid the farms when there’s no one looking—but they saw your mother. They attacked her and took her with them, kept her hostage. And your sister, well…”

The elderly man sighed, taking and then letting out a deep breath, he attempts to continue.

“She left the house to search for her the moment she got out of bed. I found her woken up by a cold sweat, then she insisted that something was wrong. I trusted her, believed her, and let her go find her mother in the fields. She came back empty-handed, I had already prepared a search party. Those Tuskens walk like men, but they’re vicious, mindless monsters. About thirty of us went, only four of us came back. I’d be out there with them, but after I lost my leg… I just couldn’t ride anymore until I heal. I don’t want to give up on her, but she’s been gone for a month.”

The silence was distrupted by the sound of light footsteps, the only noise that rung across the homestead apart from their voices.

“I’m home!” a girl’s voice announced. “Dad? Owen?”

Her voice and her arrival caught the attention of both her family and the two visitors. Anakin stood up and stepped out so that he can see—and be seen—the rotunda. Just a meter and a half away from him was a girl of ten years—nearing eleven—standing from the stairs from where he came when he himself arrived in this house.

Irele was immediately taken aback by this stranger, not because it was a new face—but because she was bothered by how familiar he looked and felt. A good minute has passed and it dawned on her. She knows who this is.

Anakin examined the girl: black hair tied back into a ponytail, donning a woven scarf to protect her from the sands, and a pair of earthy hazel eyes hooded with a somber, unreadable gaze—nearly similar a hue to Shmi’s eye color. Looking at her was like seeing Shmi in her girlhood, for Irele could perhaps grow to be the spitting image of their mother. This is his sister, he thought, but he wasn’t sure what to do or how to react and interact with her—neither of them have known much about the other. And they’ve only just met! To Irele, it felt like she had waited a lifetime to meet him; she always had that feeling, perhaps over time, she didn’t anticipate him as much.

“Irele…?” Anakin uttered.

“H-Hi…” she stuttered shyly, reacting to her name.

Cliegg spun his hoverchair, “Irele, this is your brother. Your real brother.”

Irele’s brows furrowed, she blinked several times as she examined Anakin’s features. Perhaps she could not spot any resemblance yet, but eventually she would have—if she gave it time. As the siblings stared at one another; thoughts, questions, and even comments about each other’s appearances flood their minds.

What does she know about me? Did Mom ever tell her about me?

There’s something I feel about him… though it’s making me too nervous. It’s almost like it’s something bad… or maybe because he just looks a little mean.

Before giving a proper reaction or even speaking a single word, she sprang to her heels and fled to her room, flimsily holding her satchel loosely by the strap, dangling just inches away from the ground as she ran.

The adults dismissed it as bashfulness and also surprise. Anakin did not go after her anymore and went to the direction of the front door.

“Give her time,” Cliegg advised.

“Where are you going?”

Anakin’s eyebrows slightly pulled, but Owen did not notice, “To go find my mother.”

“Your mother’s dead son, accept it. There’s little hope she’s lasted this long.”

In fact, he didn’t. He could never ever. Then Cliegg sighed in defeat, knowing that this boy might be just as stubborn as his little sister. He reached for Anakin’s forearm and clutched it weakly, slightly startling him.

“If you can’t do that… at least talk to your sister.”

The sky had burned into a golden orange hue, sunset was nearing. Night will be upon them soon. Anakin found Irele in the workshop, he recognized some of the apparatus to be Shmi’s—apparently, she had brought those with her when she and Irele were bought.

As he was approaching her, he caught a glimpse of what she was doing—she was piecing together a sort of tech that seemed familiar, along with a little help from her friends in town.

“Irele, I…”

“She told me about you,” Irele matched her brother’s firm tone of voice, though the hint of uncertainty rang along her words. She did not look at him, she spoke to him while keeping her eyes on her handicraft. “A long time ago. I just didn’t think we’d meet at this time.”

Anakin got close enough to get a better look at her tinkering, he examined the small machine and discovered that she was retrofitting a podracer’s dashboard.

Attempting and hoping he’d establish a connection with her, he caved in to listen on what Irele has to say.

“She told me that you were a great racer. You won against Sebulba.”

“Sebulba? He still races?”

Irele turned to Anakin, not exactly surprised that he still remembers the cheating Dug, though a decade’s worth of not knowing anything happening in Tatooine would at least fog his memory. His sister nodded slowly and then returned to fixing the dashboard.

“No, it’s…” she trailed off when she got too focused on arranging the wires. “It’s from a customer in Anchorhead. I used to be in a podracer’s pit stop entourage, when I was like six.”

“Do they still race?”

She shook her head, and answered the question she knew was coming, “Accident. Can’t drive a pod with just one arm, huh?”

Her posture straightened, she moved the magnifying lens away from her, and then secured the dashboard in a leather sleeve before settling it down neatly in the center of the workbench. Irele finally afforded a good long look at her big brother.

Big brother… kinda weird to call him that.

“Ani,” she uttered, though she meant it as a practice of getting used to addressing him when talking to him. She didn’t really intend to call him, but he looked at her anyway. There was a pause before she continued.

“How much did Dad tell you—about Mom?”

It slightly baffled Anakin how casually she called Cliegg her father, he cannot blame her anyway if this is the father figure she grew up with.

“Just enough for me to know,” Anakin answered.

She hummed. Then Anakin decided to ask the question that has been lingering in his mind. If this was his birth sister, was she born in the same way he was?

“Irele, perhaps you can tell me something,” he began.

Detecting the seriousness in his tone, she swiveled the chair to face him, propping her elbow on the table. Staring back at him with those hazel eyes that he cannot gaze upon without remembering Shmi—because he could definitely see his mother within his sister—he licked his lips before speaking.

“Cliegg isn’t really your father, is he?”

His sister stared at him some more with squinted eyes, bobbed her head to the side as she got the idea of his question. She wordlessly shook her head; when she did, then Anakin’s presumptions have been realized—she was exactly like him. Within their moment together of just conversing, he could feel the Force flowing in her, although it was faint and seemingly dormant. In that case, her Force-sensitivity might be still untapped—what seemed to be a small stream on a quiet summer morning will eventually turn out to be a powerful, raging dam. And so it begs the question: will he report her to the Jedi Council?

“He told you about the Tuskens, didn’t he?”

“Yes.”

“Oh…” Irele’s eyelids drooped as she looked randomly on the floor, avoiding her brother’s gaze. Another moment passed, both siblings were inept in speaking to  one another casually—unlike how Irele is to Owen—but then she lifted her head again, and this time, she looked at her real big brother with pleading eyes, suggesting a sense of longing for their mother and sadness. The latter being a dangerous emotion to dwell on. “You’ll bring her back, won’t you… Anakin?”

Then at that moment, Anakin was both determined and burdened to keep such a promise. He was confident and hopeful that he would rescue Shmi, but with such a motivation fueled by the fear of loss, Irele was beginning to sense something ominous from him. In the back of her head, she was regretting what she asked of him. She saw a shadow loom over Anakin, as dark as his long robes that sweep the sand as he strode. Her heart pumped slowly and heavily, it suffocated her and made her nervous.

There’s something not right with him. Something… bad. She thought to herself, her fingers twitched with anxiety. It’s too late to take that back. Anakin has sealed a contract forged from her behest—which was also his. Now she wanted to stop him, because she know something bad was going to happen—executing the same foresight she had for Shmi.

“Anakin, are you alright?” Irele asked, and that seemed to snap him back to reality.

He stammered as he answers, “Yes. I… I just blanked out, I guess.”

“Right…” she groaned with a growing suspicion. “Just… Just don’t lose sight of what you came for.”

Her vague warning would allude to the preceding events. Anakin took her words to heart, and his being a Jedi gave him the advantage to read people better than most, to analyze their motives and desires. Hearing Irele say something like that hints her Jedi-like abilities: her foresight, which was something Qui Gon had noted of Anakin himself when he was still a child.

“I won’t,” he said with conviction, and then he managed a smile in the hopes of easing her spirits. “Don’t worry, I’ll bring her back.”

Irele’s thin lips pursed and watched her big brother turn around to leave her be in the workshop. When his back turned to her, that smile instantaneously melted away; her stomach slightly churned at the sight of his robes shadowing his figure—he looked broader and more intimidating, and quite ominous.

She had a bad feeling. A very bad feeling about this.

[imnotwolverine]

The marriage pact - Reality strikes

Henry Cavill x OC Alice - multi-chapter

< Part 20 | Part 21 Reality strikes | Part 22 >

Disclaimer: Some angst

Author’s note: No idea what to write here today other than it’s 7.52 AM, so: good morning! 

Word count: 2.723

(Link to my Masterlist)

Dear readers,

Another year reaches its end and I’m sitting here with mixed emotions. Tonight I’ll be celebrating with friends. Meaning a house filled with a whole horde of kids and a few slightly boozed up adults.

I’ll be the only childless adult. I’ll be the only unmarried adult. And with my dear chocolate cake right now working abroad, I’ll also be the only adult that will show up alone.

It is what it is. Life’s reality. But I must admit that it sets a tiny sad note to an otherwise quite lovely year. I lost one love, but gained a far better one in return. I now know my parents better than I probably ever have - and what joy it has been to share my life with them again. Also, I am writing my first novel and that is truly a dream come true.

Looking at this from the bright side; it does give me some new goals for the next year and I can’t wait to smash next year out of the park. Do you have any new years resolutions, dear readers?

Ali

‘9..8..7…’

*BBZZZZTT-BZZZZTTTT*

With hasty fingers I grasped for my phone, hearing the count down quickly proceed. Henry bear. It was silly to feel relieved to see his name. 

He didn’t forget. 

‘5..4..3..’

Putting him on speakers I laughed as my friends had bottles of champagne in hand, thumbs on the ready-to-pop corks. Around us excited, albeit slightly sleepy, children were watching with expectant eyes, their arms hugging their favourite stuffies. It was special for them to be allowed to stay up so late, which only added onto the magic of New Years eve.

‘2..1!!!’

PffffPOP - ’Oh fuck..!!’

A cork shot out in a wild direction and near hit Gisele in the face, everyone gasping as the poor woman blinked in silent terror. Ooph..that could have gone wrong.

‘HANKK..come on!’ She laughed after recapitulating a bit, her shocked lips turning up in amused smile. And just like that the mood was good again, everyone starting to give each other kisses and hugs. After clinking my glass with a few friends I quickly walked off to the quiet of the hallway, bringing my ear back to my phone, Henry expectantly waiting for my voice.

‘Hen..’ My voice was cracking.

‘ALI, YOU OKAY? DID SOMETHING HAPPEN?’

‘Haha..’ I sniffled back a little tear. ‘No no. Just Hendrik being a fool..*sniff* with the champagne. Nobody’s hurt though.’

‘Hey baby.’ He said, still mildly concerned, hearing me sniffling back tears. ‘Hi.’ I mumbled, looking over my shoulder to see the party getting in full swing, glasses refilled and kids jumping with excitement, everyone dancing on the music that was playing on the tv.

‘Happy new year.’ I whispered, hiding another quiet sob.

‘Happy new year baby.’ He sighed. ‘Gosh I wish I could be there. I miss you terribly.’

‘Same..*sniff* sorry about this. It’s just the wine I think.’

‘Hmm..it’s okay baby. I’m going to kiss allll those tears away when I get back, okay?’ His promise sounded extra bitter, because that would take another three weeks. Three long weeks before he’d get back here for two days, only to fly back again immediately after. But then again, trying to see it on a more positive note; that gave me three weeks to put some pressure on getting that hiatus approved. And that was do-able, right?

—

‘Hi Ali.’ Mrs. Mulligan smiled, lighting up another cigarette, the office building quiet as most employees were out running reports. It was mid January and though I hoped there would be good news, I never could be quite so sure with Mrs. Mulligan. The bad ass Chief editor was hard for me to read. Was she happy? Enthused? Taking the piss? Or being for real? Sinking down in the seat opposite of her desk I gave her a pensive look.

‘Hi Mrs. Mulligan.’ I said, trying my best at returning the smile she offered me. She chuckled. ‘You worry too much Ali. Really.’ She sucked on her cigarette, the tip burning bright orange. Licking her lips she shifted forward a bit. ‘So how is Henry?’

Of course, small talk. I sighed and shrugged. ‘Bit difficult to tell with his busy schedule and the time zone issue, but, I think he’s doing alright. At least they haven’t gotten any delays thus far.’

Mrs. Mulligan turned in her chair, nodding. ‘Well let’s hope that you won’t distract him, when you join him.’ She quickly took another inhale, smiling as the realisation of her words hit me. ‘Really?!’ I sat up a bit in my chair, looking at her with widened eyes. ‘Really really. Though of course we still want to get plenty of updates. You’re one of our best reporters and..as you know..we islanders are close-knit. Even Superman can’t steal you away from us for good.’ She winked, blowing the smoke out high above her head.

I gasped quietly and I couldn’t help but laugh, the relief this news brought being just what I needed.

‘Thank you so much Mrs. Mulligan.’ I smiled.

‘You’re welcome Ali.’ She winked, then pressed her burned up cigarette down in her ash tray. Her way of saying; this meeting is over. Quickly I got up and fumbled through my jean pocket to retrieve my phone; I had to tell him! I had to tell him!

—

But I couldn’t tell him. He didn’t have reception, again. And when I tried once more later that night all I got was a quick message from him, sent from an unknown number, telling me they had some technical difficulties now they were out in the wilderness. He’d try to get a moment to call later that week, but he couldn’t promise anything. And that he missed me. Terribly.

I hated it. This. The distance. The time zones. The difficulty to reach him. The fact I couldn’t share the happy news with him. At least the good thing was that it was just one more week till I’d see him. And we’d better find a way to tackle this problem once and for all..and quickly..because with every lonely night in my bed the unease in my mind grew; like this, it simply couldn’t work. No matter how hard we both tried. If we couldn’t be together, then this relationship was doomed.

—

Once more I was standing here at the airport, looking through the arriving crowd, their suitcases rolling over the grey tiles of the hall as the cold draft made me huddle closer in my thick wool jacket. I couldn’t wait to be back in Henry’s warm embrace again, especially after being almost a month apart. It had been simply too long.

More and more people flooded the airport, loved ones embracing one another, business men back on their phones, their faces stuck in expressions of true importance. But no Henry.

*BZZZ BZZZZ*

Henry bear: Sweetheart, running a little late. Issue with my baggage.

Seeing the message on my phone, made me all the more frustrated. He was here! In this darn building! And what was up with this baggage? He really didn’t need to bring any hold luggage for just the few days he was going to be here right? Groaning in silent frustration I saw an old lady in the corner of my eye, her small blue eyes also looking over the crowd with a sense of worry. As if she couldn’t find the person she was waiting for.

Using some passersby as an excuse to move in her direction, I smiled at her, attracting her attention. ‘Picking someone up?’ I asked, finding her worried look melt in a friendly smile. ‘Hello dear. Eh..yes..my son..he was supposed to be on this flight, but I don’t see him..’ She furrowed her thin eyebrows and looked back at the sliding door, the flood of passengers slowly becoming thinner and thinner.

‘Well that makes two of us. Though I am not waiting for my son, but my boyfriend. He just texted me there’s some issues with the baggage, so maybe your son has similar problems.’ I also looked back at the sliding door, the door now sliding fully closed.

No more people coming through.

It shouldn’t have hurt so. But it did all the same. After weeks of hoping, wishing, waiting, it was all the more frustrating to have to wait even more because of something silly like an issue with the luggage. And it was especially frustrating to think that I only had so few hours with him before he had to head back again to continue shooting.

The woman turned back towards me and looked me up and down. ‘Aren’t you…’ She squinted her eyes slightly, then beamed up as recognition hit. ‘..Henry’s girl?’ I looked at her, seeing those small but warm blue eyes peering at me, her wrinkly face lined with years of many smiles and few frowns. I laughed. ‘Correct. I’m Alice. From the west side of town, work for the local newspaper.’

The woman nodded, then near jumped on her feet when the door opened and two men came strolling in. First a man who probably was her son. And then Henry. A very tired to the bone Henry, his day old beard unshaven and hair slightly disheveled. It was a silver lining that most people had long left the hall, making the odds of someone snapping a picture of him in this state just that bit smaller.

As the two men strode over towards us it became apparent that there was some mutual recognition.

‘Mrs. Penny?’ Henry blinked at the woman who was giving her son a quick but big hug. Pulling back she tilted her head slightly, taking in his disheveled look. ‘Little Henry. Look at you dear boy! All grown up! And you need a shave!’ She winked then directed at me: ‘I was his drama teacher.’

I wished to smile at her, but before I could I felt two large arms wrap around me, a head dipping down in the crook of my neck.

Henry.

Home at last.

Running my hands over his back I looked through the confines of his big embrace at the lady called Mrs. Penny, her son checking his watch as if he wasn’t quite willing to wait a moment longer. I felt Henry pull back and for the briefest of moments his lips brushed over mine.

‘Hi.’ He breathed, smiling at me warmly, albeit with great tiredness.

‘Hi bear.’ I smiled, stroking a thumb over his cheek.

Turning back towards his drama teacher Henry reached out his arms, wishing to receive a hug from her as well. She gladly accepted, snickering a bit as Henry was near twice her height and triple her weight. The tiny lady and the huge bear of a man.

‘Mom, it’s time to go. We need to get eh…’ The son licked his lip as he looked at Henry, a glint of jealousy or distaste lingering in his eyes. Thankfully his mom was quick to agree. ‘Yes yes. Time is fleeting! It is good to see you Henry and I love your work. Though gotta practise that smile talking a little.’ She tutted, pinching his cheek with some motherly affection. Henry laughed and shook his head. ‘It’s good to see you Mrs. Penny and..please..let us not hold you up.’ Henry nodded at the other man, who was practically sneering at him.

—

‘Something happened with that guy?’ I asked, driving us home in his dad’s car - anything better than my mom’s car. Henry sighed. ‘Got our bags mixed up and he just kept saying my bag was his, refusing to open it and compare the contents.’ 

He sounded so done with it all, voice low and dry, eyes peering out over the icy cold waves hitting the frosty shoreline. ‘Sounds like a pain in the ass.’ I frowned, looking at him a bit better. ‘How are you Hen?’ A question that I could easily answer myself; awful. Because he sure as hell looked awful, his whole aura dark and gloomy, perfectly fitting the weather outside.

‘Could use a nap.’ He yawned, looking back over at me and trying his best to offer me a smile, the joy not reaching his eyes.

Oh my poor bear.

‘Then let’s nap and talk later.’

‘Yea..’ He reached out a hand and squeezed the hand I kept at the gear stick. ‘I’m terribly glad to be with you again. I am. Just..tired..’s all. Sorry if I..-’ 

‘Hen..it’s okay. Relax. Close your eyes for a bit and I’ll tell you when we’ve arrived.’

‘Okay.’ He slowly nodded, immediately closing his eyes, settling more comfortably in his seat.

‘Okay.’ I whispered.

—

Running my hand through his curls, his head resting on my lap, I folded over another page of the book I was reading. We were sitting / sleeping on his parents couch, his father upstairs going about his business, his mom out for tea with a friend. The house was nice and quiet, all sound reaching my ears being Henry’s slow breathing and the buzz of the dishwasher running in the kitchen.

He looked tired even while sleeping.

Oh poor, poor bear.

It was then he shifted a little, heavy eyelids slowly blinking open and his lip curling up in a tiny smile. ‘MMmmmm…’ He hummed, nuzzling his nose in my thighs, making me giggle. ‘Hennn! Cheeky!’ He chuckled in turn, his voice deep with sleep. ‘Am I still dreaming?’ ‘No, you’re not. I’m here. And you’re home. And it’s 11.30, in case you wonder.’

He sighed deeply and nodded, shifting so he was laying flat on his back, his ocean blue eyes looking up at me. ‘Hi.’ He rumbled. ‘Hi.’ I sniffled, tracing my fingers through his curls again, massaging his scalp ever so slightly. ‘Mmm..I missed you. Your hands..’ He slowly sat up, moving his nose into my chest, sniffing a long line up into my neck. ‘..your smell.’

I giggled again. ‘Okay then Geralt.’ He smiled and sat back a little, cupping my cheek. ‘It was worth every delay, every sleepless hour, every luggage swap annoyance.’ And then he placed the first proper kiss on my lips. Soft and loving, as if testing again how I feel like. How our lips can slot together perfectly.

And what a good kisser he was. Hmm.

Humming gladly I didn’t wish the kiss to end, but he eventually did break it, chuckling softly when I leaned into him a little more. ’How are you sweet one?’ He asked, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, looking studiously at my face. As if relearning what I looked like.

Gosh we had really been apart for too long. If anything this had to be prevented from here on at any cost. At any..

‘OH! I have news actually.’ I smiled at him, my worried face turning up with pure joy. He also started to smile. ‘Does this mean that..?’ - ‘Yes. Or well. I don’t know what you’re assuming here. But eh..yea..I received green light for my hiatus. So..’

‘AAAHH YES!’ He let out an excited cheer and quickly pulled me in for another kiss. Deeper this time. And longer. Until both of us had to pull apart for the simple fact of requiring fresh air in our lungs. He was properly beaming. ‘Oh baby..oh…so..when and..?’ He babbled, keeping my face close to his. ‘Now, right now.’ I laughed, feeling his aura lighten up, the dark storm clouds pulling away, his eyes finally starting to shine with happiness.

—

The next morning we had our usual morning walk and it almost felt like it had for all those months before he left. Albeit that there was no happy Akita trodding ahead of us - Kal was still in Canada. With gloved hands interlinked we stepped in steady rhythm, small clouds coming from our mouths as we talked and laughed into the cold morning air.

‘You better pack real warm. It’s really, really cold over there.’ He smiled, pulling me closer and kissing my cold red nose. ‘Mmpff can’t wait.’ I grumbled - hating the cold, but accepting it if that meant I could finally be with Henry. ‘Hahaha. Oh sweetheart. Now...’ He halted us before a large blue slatted house. ‘Are you ready to move in with me?’ He raised a teasing eyebrow and I poked him playfully in the ribs.

‘I thought you’d never ask.’

--

General tagsquad: @harrysthiccthighss​ @tumblnewby @magdelen69​ @thereisa8ella​ @mary-ann84​ @darkbooksarwin​ @summersong69​ @madbaddic7ed​

Fluff lovers squad: @star017​ @perhaps2remember​ @pterodactylterrace​ @witchersqueen​ @desperate-and-broken​​ @toomanyfandomsshreya​​ @deliciouslysassyarcade​​ @pamacs-macs​​ @cavilladdict​​ @scorpionchild81​​ @lebguardians​​ @sofiebstar​​ @amberbabem​​ @mis-lil-red @aestheticqueenb​​ @misslalaland-blog-blog​ @ilieherecharmed-fics2readnrec​ @michelehansel​ @henryfanfics101​

Want to be added to or removed from the tag list? Shoot me a message!

[randomfandomimagine]

End Of The Year Faves

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 8 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome work!

I was tagged by @myriadimagines and @musicallisto, thank you, lovelies!

10. Zack Fair (FFVII) gif imagine

I really love this one because it’s like the definition of short and sweet. It’s adorable, warm and I think I got Zack’s characterization pretty well and I often reread it when I need a smile. I just love my boy Zack and how this little thing turned out.

9. Connor (DBH) prompt (”I shouldn’t be in love with you”)

The reason I love this one it’s because I wrote it as one of my favorite things to write: a character study. I tried to express Connor’s struggle as he develops feelings for the reader and how conflicted he would be to have fallen in love with someone, having developed such a human thing as feelings. One of the many reasons why I love Connor is because of his arc in the game, because of how guilty he feels for becoming deviant despite being the very android that hunts them, it just gets to me. I’m just really glad that I could explore that in this prompt and that I managed to show it properly as well as make this more angsty, since my specialty is usually fluff.

8. Yennefer (Witcher) prompt (”I shouldn’t be in love with you” “Are you jealous?” “I’m so scared”)

This is the only Yennefer request I’ve ever gotten (besides one for a dating would include that I had already written), and I had so much fun writing it! Yennefer has appeared in my Witcher writings a lot, but never as a main character and never as a love interest, so that’s why this was so cool! I think she’s a very interesting character, so I really enjoyed getting the chance to explore her personality. I love how it turned out because I think it’s the perfect balance between her being sly and also being loving and showing her feelings for the reader. 

7. Too Nice (John Ambrose McClaren, TATBILB ficlet)

John Ambrose is another character I really like writing for. What can I say? I fell in love with him and it was great to write something for him. This is somewhere between love and almost hate, with a lot of misunderstandings and complex feelings that ultimately lead to a happy fluffy ending. He’s just the sweetest and it was curious to write his reactions to someone who doesn’t always respond well to his kindness, even if because it flusters them.

6. Special (Howl Pendragon, HMC ficlet)

And yet another character I love. It was a bit hard settling on just one version of the character, because I love both the movie and book versions, so I tried to make it a little bit of both... even if this Howl is more suave and charming like in the movie rather than the absolute endearing disaster that book Howl is. Still, I always have fun getting other characters involved with the reader and their love interest, so I loved adding Calcifer and Marko to the mix. As well as the cute interactions Howl and reader have, I love the ending in which he hints at the fact that the reader unlocked something in his heart that he didn’t think was possible.

5. Kind (Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad ficlet)

I don’t often get to write about Jesse, so this was awesome! Peekaboo was one of my favorite episodes and it was amazing to get to explore it. While it’s not perfect, I really like how the connection between Jesse and reader turned out, how kind (:D) he is and patient and respectful, and I think I also poured a lot of emotion to the reader with that background.

4. Separated (Zuko, ATLA ficlet)

By this point, it’s obvious that I’m more proud of ficlets (because they’re longer and take more planning and more time and effort) and about characters I love because I think the passion I have for them is more obvious. I wrote this one right when I was watching ATLA because I loved (and still love) Zuko so much. It’s sort of a character study as well (it’s established that I adore writing them) and I’m so glad that I had the idea of getting Iroh involved because he’s awesome. This ficlet just has a lot of pining and repressed emotions that come out in the end and I love it.

3. Weight On His Shoulders (PS4 Peter Parker ficlet)

This one if pretty recent, as I wrote it after beating the game myself. This game is just awesome, and this is my favorite representation of Peter ever. He’s cute, charming, nerdy, loving, kind, a bit awkward and just everything that Peter and Spidey should be (at least for me). I wanted to represent both his personas in this one, and I like the balance I achieved with it as well as the emotions, the pining, the secret identity and in the end the understanding of the reader. The part with Spidey saving reader is great and I’m very happy with how reader is prepared to confront him about it once they learn he’s Spiderman only to change their mind when they see how much it’s weighing on him so they decide to relax with him for a bit.

2. Reunion (Cloud Strife, FFVII ficlet)

I’ve written a lot of things for this fandom this year because I was super inspired after beating the remake with my brother, I loved it (honorable mentions to Heal My Heart and Stars In Your Eyes, two other ficlets that I wrote and I’m very proud of). Cloud has always been one of my favorite characters, and in this one I got to examine a side of him I usually don’t. Not only does this ficlet include Zack Fair (another one of my favorite characters) but it also goes along with an idea I had been thinking about for a long time of a female reader pretending to be a boy to get into SOLDIER and becoming friends with them, but it also shows Cloud as the meeker and shy boy he is in Crisis Core. It was so cool to write about him back then and after once he had joined AVALANCHE. His relationship with the reader was also bittersweet because of their past and it’s just so complex and emotional that I love it, especially their reunion at the end.

1. Soul of a Warrior (Jaskier x Nissa, The Witcher Fanfiction Series). This was a big project, as series always are. I spent several months planning and plotting the story and even more months writing it, and also revising it once it was finished before posting it. I put so much effort, love and time into this series that it absolutely had to be number one. Soul of a Warrior is probably the thing I’m most proud of (that I have written) in 2020. 

As most of you know (my mutuals definitely do, as they have gifted me amazing things with him), Jaskier is probably the character I fangirled the hardest about this year. I wrote many things for him (the ficlet What Would You Do Without Me? deserves another honorable mention because it’s probably my favorite thing I’ve written this year along with the series) and working on each of them has brought me so much serotonin. Jaskier is just such an amazing character, loving and compassionate but cheeky and selfish while at the same time being charming, optimistic, bubbly, extroverted and a huge flirt. So many layers!

But back to the series... Soul of a Warrior had one of the best faceclaims I’ve found, the sweetest friendship between my OC Nissa and Geralt and the slowest of burns romances with Jaskier. Him and Nissa are very similar in some aspects, so much so that they’re both too blind to realize the other’s feelings (idiots to lovers, am I right?) but they care so much about one another. The three of them were strangers, but they become family (found family, another one for the fandom bingo!) and I’m the proudest of how real and organic their relationship feels. Not to mention that their dynamic was super fun to write because Geralt is the only one that knows they’re in love and is so fed up and exasperated with their obliviousness. As well as this, I think I managed to mix action, emotion and depth really well. My secondary OCs feel more alive than others before them, Nissa was pretty complex and coherent and had a true voice of her own, and their part on the story feels important. There are tense moments, cute ones, sad ones, tragic ones... a little bit of everything. I think this one as a lot more angst and whump because I was in a bit of a dark place when I wrote it, but it still has hope and light in it, which I really love. The series also has a lot more violence than what I’m used to, but it was interesting to get out of my comfort zone a bit. 

Overall, not only do I think it’s fun to read, compelling, funny and emotional all at once, I’m just very proud that I managed to write something a little different from what I usually do and feel like I did it well. I put a big part of me in this series and for that reason Soul of a Warrior will always have a special place in my heart 💜

That it’s, sorry if I ranted a bit! I tag anyone who wants to do this!! 

[sopeyb23-blog]

Coming Home

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9

Summary: While Spencer recovers at OC’s old home, she is forced to tell what happened to her there.

Warnings: Anxiety, Trauma, Injury, hit and run, stalking, swearing, angst, panic, suicide (past)

pairing: Spencer Reid X OC

Words: 2K

A/N: this ones suuuuper dark people, i’m not gonna lie. Its longer than usual because I am hoping to finish this series with the next chapter! If criminal minds style plots trigger you I wouldn’t recommend this chapter is pretty dark.

*I do not own any CM characters 

~~~~~~~~

Part 9

Spencer~

For the days that we stayed in her house, I never once saw a sign in her parents, or even her sister for that matter, that would tell me about what happened to her here. Not that I was looking so hard. It’s difficult sometimes, to keep myself from looking at all the little moves people make. It's difficult to not immediately think the worst of everyone around me after all of the horrible parts of humanity that I’ve seen. I had been in situations similar to hers before. I knew the pain of thinking that your trauma is something for only you to handle. The terrifying feeling that maybe it won't go away, thinking constantly that I’m just a burden. I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone, especially not anyone I love as much as her. 

I looked up from my seat at the counter to where Sophie and her sister were talking in hushed voices. Every once in a while I would see the both of them look at the pictures adorning the walls of the house. At some of them they would give a faint smile, while at others a small grimace. I heard little bits of their conversations sometimes, slowly putting together what I missed.

“We promised not to talk about-” 

“Well we also said we wouldn't-”

“Have you seen-”

“No, I assumed they were-”

It was that moment, that I'm sure of. The moment none of them would speak of. Something that not only made the three siblings closer than ever, but also more afraid of losing one another than they ever had been. Something big enough to scare two of three of them out of the state the same year, to never come back. Something so terrifying to all of them that they would never even talk about it.

Sophie~

Spencer sat at my kitchen counter slowly eating the soup I had made for him the previous night. Lu and I were in the doorway to the living room talking as quietly as we could.

“If you would just tell him we wouldn’t have to-” 

“No, not yet, I don’t want to have to bring him into this!”

We were talking about that night. The night that the three of us would keep guarded forever. Less than two months after that night I left for college and never came back. That is, until now. I knew I had to tell Spencer. I was waiting until we could go home. When I wasn't here anymore, then maybe, but it seemed that we wouldn't be leaving for at least another week. I didn't want to keep dodging his questions. But the fact of the matter is, not only does this change everything for him, but for me as well. And I am notoriously bad with change. After keeping this to myself for all these years, the prospect of telling someone else terrified me. Even if that person was Spencer.

“Sophie, I love you, you know that. We both know what happened wasn't our fault. But not telling him doesn't make it go away. You have to do it. Staying here without him knowing just puts him and you more at risk than ever.”

Spencer~

Now that, I heard. Loud and clear even though my brain was hazy from pain and sleep. What risk? If something happened to her I don’t know what I would do. Another loss in my life would be too much. I only had her left to lose. She's all I have left. 

“Sophie if you're in trouble you know I would help you, right?” I attempted to stay quiet but the thought of her trying to do this on her own was one step I wasn’t willing to take.

She quickly turned around after hearing my voice and rubbed a hand over her forehead.

“If somethings wrong you need to tell me. I can help.” she put her hand down and walked toward me. 

“I know, Spence, I know” she sat down on the stool next to me and took my hand.

“How about we take a walk?” Her eyes pleaded with me not to say anything more for the moment, and I complied. She helped me up from the seat and kept her hand on my back as she walked me out of the house.

“There's a place, out back, I used to go there when I was upset, it's quiet so we can talk”

Her voice rang with sadness and defeat but her eyes stayed looking toward the ground and she walked with me on a small gravel path leading behind the house.

Sophie~

This is not how it was supposed to happen. I was going to take him back home, I was going to put on the tea kettle and make us both peppermint tea. I was going to sit beside him on the couch in our living room and tell him about that night. But here I am, walking with him back to the place I used to come to cry when I was young. Preparing to tell him something that would change everything. 

“Right here, Spence. Sit.” I sat him on a log bench overlooking the ocean behind my house. I stood before him for a second, contemplating how to tell him before sitting beside him on the bench.

“It started when I was sixteen”

I laughed and opened up my car door, throwing my backpack in the backseat before moving to the front. On the front seat was a little envelope, presumably slipped through the little crack at the top of my window. It was addressed to me in dark bold lettering, but handwriting that I didn’t recognize. I sent a picture to my best friend at the time, Ben. He responded almost immediately:

B: wasn’t me, I promise! Where'd you find that?

S: my car, it was just sitting on the driver's seat, should I open it?

B: ummmm, Yeah!! But send me a picture of what it says!

I carefully opened the envelope, trying my best to not rip- 

“Wait, wait, wait.” Spencer stopped me in my tracks and put his hand out in front of him like he was stopping a car in the road.

“Ben? Isn't he-”

“The one that killed himself the first year we were dating” I stopped him in his tracks and gulped after I said it. It was never an easy thing to talk about, even so long after. But he comes in later, and I have too much of the story left to start crying now, so I continued.

I opened it to find a badly folded bit of construction paper with a note saying “I always love it when you wear braids” behind the paper was about six or seven pictures of me. All of them were in color and taken from afar, usually at my back, with the braids that I wore so often circled on each photo in red sharpie. I took a few photos to send to Ben but didn't wait for a response before securing the envelope in my glove compartment and locking my doors. I right away texted my sister the photos as well and drove off as fast as I could from the school parking lot.

“So you were being stalked?”

“In short, yes. It got worse and much more frequent. After that I stopped wearing my braids as often. I figured, if that's what he wants I'm sure as hell not giving it to him. But the pictures kept coming, until one day a few months after the first envelope my mom found one on my doorstep.”

“Oh, Sophie, I forgot to tell you, I put a letter for you on your desk, I found it on the porch.” my heart stopped when she told me. He had never left them at my home before. He had left them in my car, in my locker, in my school bag even, but never once at my home. I never told my mom, only my siblings and Ben. I faked a smile to her after I could calm my breathing enough to speak.

“Thanks, Mom, I'll look at it a bit. It's probably just an invitation or something” I couldn't bring her into this, especially not now that he knew where I lived. 

I took photos of the new envelope. The same handwriting adorned the note and my name written on the outside. Again the note was written with a red sharpie on badly folded construction paper. Again six or seven photos with markings all over the pictures in the same red sharpie as on the note. This time, the pictures were closer. Some still far away, but those taken from afar were through windows. Some even into my bedroom.

“And you didn't go to the police?” Spencer's voice yet again interrupted me from the memories that were so prevalent in my mind.

“No. The new note said I couldn't. I was a young woman, in Maine, Spence. No one would have taken me seriously even if I had. Besides, in that same note he wrote the address of all of my friends and family. He promised to kill them If I told anyone.” Spencer said nothing but his eyes and shoulders sank. He put a hand on my leg and rubbed as he saw me shake. Even all these years later the very thought of it scared me so bad that I could barely breathe.

It continued like that for two years. Once a month at least I would get an envelope. I never saw him. After I graduated there were a few months where I didn’t get a note. I thought it was over. My brother and my sister came back to Maine for the summer. I was accepted into an accelerated MD program at Tufts and was leaving in a few months. Then, three months before I was supposed to leave, the notes came back. 

“Lu, I don't know what to do!” I sat on the couch in our living room and cried to her while my brother stood by the wall reading the note. After he was done reading, he grabbed my hand and looked me dead in the eyes.

“We’re going to the school” He helped me and Lu up from the couch and we all got in his car.

“Dominic, we can’t! You saw the last one! He knows where we live!” 

“He said we couldn't go to the police, he never said anything about the school” 

And so, we went. He parked in the back and locked the car with the windows rolled up even with the summer heat. He walked in front of me and Lu behind me. And then we went in. 

“So you told the school?”

“We tried. It was already dark by the time we had gotten there. There was no one in the building, so we left.”

Defeated, Dominic promised me that we would go as soon as we could the next day and he and Lu walked out of the building towards the car. I swear before it happened I felt something was wrong. There was nothing that could have told me that, I know. But as I stepped off of that curb in front of the building, chills went up my spine. I looked up to see the face of a boy in my class. I didn't even know his name but I recognized him. He was driving a car. A red Ford truck. As I smiled up to him I didn't even notice his engine revving. He hit me full force and drove off without a second of hesitation. 

I was sobbing now, remembering the pain that I felt before I went unconscious. I was barely conscious for a minute before I passed out. But still that was the worst pain I had felt in my life. Spencer rubbed my back and coached me through breathing as best he could. His face was a mixture of panic and sadness but he said nothing as he helped me breathe.

“I should have died that night, maybe then he would have left us all alone”

[pride-and-flags-47]

Nonbinary November, Again!

Last year i answered the 22 questions @letters-to-lgbt-kids made for november, and I think it’s a good idea do re-answer them!

1.Which labels do you use?

At the moment, my gender labels are trans guy, nonbinary and demiboy, my gender isn’t exactly three gender but also isn’t exactly only one. For other non gender related stuff, aroace and gay (gay as in mlm, nblm, nblnb and mlnb).

And Ive named my gender but don't actively use the term, but it's still my gender, boyenbyflux.

2.What are your pronouns?

Only he/him!

3.How old were you when you came out to yourself as nonbinary?

Had to look in the older answers, but ye, in 2017 I used the label demigirl but never really thought of myself as not cis at the time, and in december of 2018 was when I realized I was trans, and started using demiboy, but as far as using the label nonbinary itself, around the middle of 2019.

4.What’s one thing you’d like to tell your younger self?

I always have a hard time with things like this. I think I’ll focus this on Alec on early 2020 for this: you’re not faking or cis for having weird gender dysphoria/euphora/apathy days, and a part of these weird days is because of the nonbinary part being louder than the male part of your gender at that moment.

5.Is there a myth about nonbinary people that annoys you the most?

Not really a myth, but the wrong belief that nonbinary genders are only one thing and that they can’t sometimes lean towards one or both binary genders.

6.Is there a nonbinary celebrity you look up to?

Not really? I’m not really big on following celebrities.

7.If you’re out, how did you come out?

Haven’t come out to most people I know irl. But I did come out to a colleague, it went well! I came out through WhatsApp and just said that I'm trans and aroace and gay.

8.Is there a gender-related pun you like?

non-bee-nary

Also not really a pun but none gender with left boy XD

9.Do you have friends who identify as nonbinary, too?

Nbfbsbsnn yeah basically most of my transmasc friends are also on the nonbinary spectrum.

10.Do you have a favorite lgbt+ character?

My characters fndnfsnn

But also my friends’ ocs.

As for more known media I forgot everything right now.

11. Lgbt, lgbt+, lgbtqa+… which one do you usually use?

All of them but also LGBTQ and LGBTQ+ and many other alternatives. Depends on the day.

12. How do you explain the term “nonbinary” to people who have no idea what it means?

A gender that isn’t entirely a binary gender (aka man and woman), basically almost any gender that isn’t 100% man or woman.

13.Tell us a fun fact about yourself (gender-related or random!)

I’ve been drawing everyday this year so far!

14.How did you find your name?

OK now that I have more names, I’ll go through each one XD

I chose Alec because two months before I realized I was trans I created an oc and called him Alec and I thought it was the closest to the male version of my deadname (it’s honestly not that close) and then I started using it! And it's my main name still.

As for Arthur, I just like it! Same for Alexandre, besides the fact that I though of a hypothetical scenario where I’m called uncle Alexandre and it makes me soft :3 and I had already been thinking about using Arthur or Alexandre instead of Alec or as my legal name while Alec would be a nickname, back in 2019 but I forgot about this until like, august/september of this year. And its AlexandRE, not AlexandER, Alexandre is more common here in my country + I have an oc with the name Alexander and he’s a horrible person and I couldn’t ever use that name for me XD

And Alex, it’s because I ended up starting relating a lot with my oc with that name, and there’s the bonus that is very similar to Alec and it’s a nice name.

15.If you’re in a relationship, how did your partner react to your coming-out?

I don’t have a partner.

16.Do you prefer partner, datemate, significant other or something else?

I don’t want a romantic relationship but if I enter a QPR I’d like to be called boyfriend :3 I also like the term joyfriend :3 I’m ok with partner but isn’t my prefered one.

17.A piece of advice for questioning kids?

Take your time, there’s no pressure to find out as fast as possible. Also gender and orientation is weird so it’s normal to end up going through a lot of labels, to settle with the first one you think about, to change between labels and go back to the first one and even to never really always settle. Life is weird and labels are too, and you have my full on support on your questioning journey.

18.Which flag(s) do you use?

I've been also looking for other gay man flags but haven't settled with another besides the rainbow one, but Ive been looking at the one libragender made and it's pretty nice.

And these last two i made them! It's the mlm + nblm flag and the flag about my gender!

19.Any tips for bad days?

Drink water, eat something, if you’re able, socialize and/or take a walk and get some sunlight. It wont help everything but somethimes that’s what is what is wrong and if it’s not the case, at least it’s less things making you feel worse.

And this blog is always open to listening and supporting, althought I may not always have advice, I can lend an ear for vents and stuff.

20.Do you have a favorite nonbinary blog on tumblr?

@finley-myself

Their comic is great and they’re honestly a really nice person!

21.Feminine, masculine, androgynous - or none of those things?

I call my presentation soft masc. It’s definetly masculine, with a tinge of androgeny but without anything feminine, Or I take something feminine and make it androgenous. And it’s soft because it’s not overly masculine, it’s masc light.

22. What are your three favorite things about yourself?

1- My sense of humor

2- My knowledge of random things

3- My attention to small things

And that’s it! be sure to check Oliver’s blog out too! It’s a really nice and positive place and his letters always cheer me up!

[thebiasrekkers]

Make It Right [BTS Mafia!AU]

Plot: “It’s always darkest before the dawn…” It’s a dog-eat-dog world in Seoul, South Korea. One has to dwell in the shadows in order to reach for the light. What are you willing to sacrifice in order to feel the sunlight on your face? What will it take to drag you back into darkness? How long will the journey be to make it right?

Rating: NC-17 // NSFW

Genre: Series | Mafia!AU | Crime!AU | Angst | Romance/Fluff

Pairings: Jin x OC | Taehyung/Hoseok x OC | Yoongi/Jungkook x OC

Warnings: Graphic Violence, Heavy Language, Angst, Slow Burn, Smut

Previous Chapters: Prologue 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34

Links: FAQ || BTS Masterlist || Admin E’s AO3 || Admin E’s WP || [ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ]

Word Count: 2,832

Tag List: @prisczero​, @pinkpjmin​, @btsaudge​, @flowerwrites06​, @unoriginal-username15432, @halussali​

CHAPTER 34: EPIPHANY

“Underneath the smiling mask, my true self is coming out.”

© thebiasrekkers (Admin E). All rights reserved. Reposting/modifying our work is prohibited. Translations are not allowed. Plagiarism/stealing is not tolerated by any means. Legal action will be taken in instances of theft.

Seoul – Cheongdam; Gangnam District South Korea

Anastasia groaned when she felt someone tugging at her shoulder, attempting to rouse her from her drunken slumber. Her body swayed back and forth and she swatted at the hand pulling her. Her hand fumbled around for the covers and she attempted to yank them up and over her head. Solace was given to her for a moment and she hummed in sleepy contentment.

However, her victory was short-lived when the blanket was completely ripped from her body, exposing her to the open air. Flailing like a toddler throwing a tantrum, Anastasia flopped onto her back and then sprung up into a sitting position. Her dirty blonde hair was messy and tangled but she didn’t care. Instead, she glared up at the person who was destroying her sweet slumber.

“Ana,” Raelyn said while shaking her head, “if you don’t get up and come on.”

Anastasia flung her arms around in various directions, fighting back an oncoming migraine and whining in the process. “Rae Unnie, it’s my day off!”

Raelyn held a glass of water out to her. She took it and automatically opened her other hand to accept the aspirin that was waiting for her. Raelyn smirked when she downed the aspirin and drained the glass.

“I made breakfast,” said the older woman, turning away from her to head down the small flight of stairs from the bedroom loft, “so get washed up and come down to eat.”

“Kay,” was all Anastasia offered before swinging her legs over the edge of the bed.

Not wanting to keep her friend waiting, she opted to wash her face and brush her teeth. She’d shower later. Once she made her way downstairs, Anastasia took note of the folded-up blankets and pillows on the couch. The previous night’s antics played out in her mind and she couldn’t help grinning.

Raelyn suddenly showed up at her door with two big bottles of booze. Anastasia wasn’t one to usually turn down free alcohol, but she also knew that Raelyn wasn’t the type to mindlessly indulge in binge drinking like some college student. There was clearly something on her mind and the only way to chase it away was through booze. Anastasia could relate and since she had the next day off, she didn’t mind spending the evening drinking away.

They played cards, Monopoly, UNO and vegged out on the couch watching Netflix. Neither of them talked about work or the boys. Anastasia could tell that Raelyn wanted to avoid those subjects as much as possible. Everyone deserved a night to escape and there was a part of her that felt bad that they hadn’t included Eden. When it was mentioned, Raelyn said that Eden had other plans. Without having to say it aloud, Anastasia knew that it was with Jungkook. The woman was brutally honest and stubborn, but her affection toward Jungkook was cute.

She would tease her about it relentlessly.

The smells from the kitchen made Anastasia’s stomach groan, reminding her that she was, in fact, starving. It reminded her of when she had her own aspirations to start a restaurant and ultimately failed. It was probably for the best, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t prone to thinking about those days from time to time.

Raelyn whipped them up a traditional Southern Style breakfast of sausage, eggs, grits and toast. A side of sliced strawberries were set on small plates. Anastasia watched her pour a glass of milk and a glass of orange juice for each of them. When everything was set, the two women sidled onto the chairs by the counter and began to eat, neither of them wanting to say anything until they’d gotten a few bites in.

Anastasia swallowed a mouthful of toast and scrambled eggs, washing it down with milk, before finally deciding to break the silence. “So, do you want to talk about it now?”

The fork hovered by Raelyn’s lips and stayed there for a few seconds. She sighed, setting the utensil down on her plate. Anastasia remained quiet, not sure if she should repeat the question. There was a glint in Raelyn’s eyes that almost screamed what was being turned over and over inside of her head. But doing that would mean she hadn’t processed anything; that she hadn’t been sitting on this something for days.

She wouldn’t have shown up with the offer to booze it up if she wasn’t prepared to get her mind right.

Stabbing at a piece of strawberry, Anastasia gripped the utensil and tried to slow her heart rate some. It never usually took Raelyn this long to speak her mind. Especially if something was bothering her. This, in turn, made her uncomfortable. But instead of prodding further, she waited.

She watched Raelyn pressing her hand to her forehead, sighing again. “Everything’s fucked up,” she finally said.

Anastasia blinked, canting her head slightly. “What do you mean?”

Raelyn was now pressing both of her hands to her face. “I mean everything is fucked up, Ana.”

There was a broken tone in her voice that was unfamiliar to Anastasia. She couldn’t help but worry that something terrible had happened. But from what she understood, the boys were doing okay. Their businesses were thriving, and they were walking away from the criminal underworld like they’d dreamed. Raelyn’s reason for worrying wasn’t even a factor anymore. She could date Taehyung freely and without the strain of having to look over her shoulder.

She didn’t understand what the problem was.

Anastasia reached out to place a hand on her friend’s shoulder. “Did something happen?” She paused, brows furrowing. “I mean, besides what happened with Eden Unnie?”

She’d heard about the incident that occurred when Raelyn was dispatched to another hospital. Eden got half a dozen voicemails from her that day and an earful of high-pitched screaming when she finally answered the phone. Regardless of how tough her friends were, Anastasia didn’t want them getting hurt. Not when there wasn’t a need for them to worry about it anymore.

Raelyn shook her head back and forth fervently, her fingers clenching into fists near her forehead. “Things were supposed to get better once they went straight, right?” Anastasia’s brows furrowed when the older woman finally turned to look at her, eyes wide and shaking. “So why does it feel like things are going to get worse?”

“What?” She felt a lump forming in her throat. “What in the world is that supposed to mean? Why would they get worse?”

The older woman laughed, border lining mania, and this caused Anastasia’s hand to fall from her shoulder. “God, how could I have been so fucking stupid? How could I have missed it?”

Anastasia didn’t understand what she was talking about. However, just because she couldn’t understand didn’t mean that the implications weren’t unsettling. It felt like she’d eaten a bag of river stones for breakfast – her stomach heavy and cold.

“Jimin told me something, Ana, and I’m not gonna lie, it rattled the hell out of me.”

“What did he—”

“The boys might be out, but there’s competition that wants them to stay.”

She blinked, unable to believe what she’d just heard.

“Whoa, wait…what?” Again, she blinked. “Why?”

“That’s the million-dollar question, isn’t it?” Raelyn scoffed. “Why in the fuck—”

“—would they want their rivals to stick around when they could just claim the territory the Golden Jackals left for themselves?” Anastasia finished the thought and now it was Raelyn’s turn to look surprised. Averting her gaze, she curled her hand near her chin while glaring at her half-eaten breakfast. “That just doesn’t make sense. Strategically, when competition is gone, that leaves room for a takeover when the option for a merger is no longer on the table.”

From a marketing or bargaining standpoint, attacking the former Golden Jackals would lead to zero gain. She recalled a conversation she had with Seokjin about something similar. When companies refused to go along with mergers, a buyout option was presented. If the buyout option was refused, then eradicating all competition from the board was the next step. But if the competition chose to pull itself from the game, then the remaining competitors usually fought amongst themselves over who would take over what was left behind.

Pulling the competition back that chose to remove themselves would bring them no profit. It would create unrest all over again…

Is someone foaming at the mouth or something?

When she next met Raelyn’s gaze, it was like something dawned on the older woman. Several emotions passed over her face, but the one that Anastasia recognized immediately was anger. Something she’d said apparently set her off.

“They think they’re bluffing.”

“Huh?”

Raelyn stood from her chair suddenly, causing Anastasia to recoil. “They think Hoseok and the others are bluffing!” She began pacing and all Anastasia could do was follow her with her eyes. “They’re not sure if they’ve really dissolved or not. That’s why they’re not launching a war.” She smacked her forehead while letting loose a mirthless laugh. “That’s why the others haven’t started stirring up shit. They’re not sure what Hoseok and the others are going to do!”

Anastasia heard her laugh again, but it sounded terrible, making her skin crawl. “Rae…”

The older woman continued pacing for a few more minutes, muttering things to herself. When she suddenly stopped, Anastasia was halfway out of her seat. The two friends met each other’s gazes and it was like they both thought the same thing at that very same moment.

“What’s going to happen when they find out that it’s true?”

The work week seemed to crawl at a snail’s pace. It was unbearable and Anastasia was sure she would start the process of plucking her own eyeballs out. Seokjin and she hardly had time to see each other at all since he was doing his best to assist Hoseok and Namjoon at the new hotel in Yongsan. Not that she blamed him or needed her hand held. He wouldn’t have hired her if he didn’t think she was capable of handling things without him constantly being in the office.

Jimin being there was a boon and he was always at the ready to assist whenever she needed him. Even when she didn’t, he had coffee and snacks ready – encouraging her to take breaks before she got lost in a mountain of paperwork.

Burying herself in her work, however, was the only way she could successfully chase her worries from her mind.

She’d wanted to pick Jimin’s brain; to figure out what was going on behind the scenes. All she knew was the financial aspect of their businesses. It was her job to maintain it and make sure all the books were up to date. Nothing was out of place and Seokjin wasn’t asking her to fudge the books either. Accounts were stable and clean. No money was laundered since none of their funds were funneling in from an outside source even remotely associated with the criminal underworld.

Yet she couldn’t shake the frustration and worry that radiated from Raelyn. It was bleeding across to her now, making it hard to focus on her job. Seokjin and she were getting closer, sure, and others could clearly see that they were an item. But without him there to reassure her that things were going to be alright, Anastasia felt on edge. Hell, borderline neurotic. She could admit it.

Was their friend, Eden, suffering like this also? When she saw her a few days ago, it didn’t look like it. What was she doing that was different than what either Raelyn or she were? Had the mixed girl gotten her hands on some magic pills, being selfish and unwilling to share?

Wanting to stop by her friend’s shop on her lunch break, she took a breath of air in relief when she arrived and saw that nothing was happening. The garage was closed, a sign hanging out the window saying they were out to lunch and would be back in an hour. Anastasia finished her paperwork early and decided she would take a long lunch, so she had time to kill until her friend got back. Maybe Eden would have some answers to the questions that were constantly nagging at her.

Just as she was about to hail a cab to a nearby café, Anastasia let out a sharp squeak, realizing too late that someone was now in front of her. Her chest bumped into said person, causing her to stumble backwards. The stiletto points of her shoes scraped along the concrete loudly. When she was positive she was going to see the sky, a pair of hands grabbed her shoulders to steady her.

“Whoa,” said a gentle voice, a hint of amusement laced through it, “careful there.”

“I’m so sorry!” Anastasia apologized, taking a step back and bowing her head. “I should have been paying more attention.”

“It’s alright. I was just wondering where the fire was.”

When she finally lifted her head to look up, she saw an unfamiliar man standing in front of her. He had mouse brown hair, umber eyes, and a sweet smile that mirrored in motion with said eyes. Flushing at his appearance, she quickly shifted her gaze to look away from him. She felt more embarrassed than anything else.

“There’s no fire.”

“I can see that.” She moved to look at him again just as the man brushed some of his hair out of his eyes. “Were you here for an appointment?”

“Oh, no,” she said with a laugh, “I just came to see my friend. Looks like I just missed them.”

He slipped his hands into the pockets of his slacks. “In this day and age, you didn’t think to call her ahead of time?”

Anastasia pressed her hand against the side of her neck, giving a shy laugh while shrugging one shoulder. “I suck at surprises?” She laughed again until a thought struck her, causing a tiny shiver to shoot down her spine. Her hand slid slowly from her neck, falling to her side as she began narrowing her eyes at the stranger in front of her. “How did you know my friend’s a girl?”

“I assumed.”

“Assumed that I don’t have guy friends?” Anastasia took a step back when she saw the man’s gaze darken, his smile remaining. “Or that you already know who owns this shop?”

The man laughed, shrugging and then taking a step forward. She took another step back. He leaned forward, peering at her like he was examining a specimen in a jar.

“Clever girl,” he mused, straightening to his full height, “it didn’t take you long to pick up on that. No wonder you’re their financial advisor.”

Her eyes narrowed further. Anastasia didn’t appreciate being mocked. “…and who the fuck are you?”

“Ya, Yoo Kihyun,” called a familiar voice from the sidewalk. They both looked to see Yoongi approaching them and Anastasia felt a wave of relief wash over her. “What do you think you’re doing?”

Kihyun gave a lazy smile but there was no warmth in the gesture. Anastasia shuffled a few steps back when Yoongi closed the distance between them. He made a point to place himself in front of Anastasia, shielding her from the man who was getting his kicks out of messing with her. She had half a mind to throw her shoe at him.

Peering at him over Yoongi’s shoulder, Anastasia maintained vigilance as the other man scrutinized over her rescuer.

“Ah, Yoongi-ah. It’s been so long.”

She heard Yoongi scoff. “Not long enough. Now answer me: what do you think you’re doing?” Kihyun said nothing. “Actually, a better question: why are you here?”

“No reason,” he dismissed and Anastasia bit back her urge to pop off, “curiosity mostly.”

“I’m not surprised. You’ve always been a sick, twisted little fuck.” Anastasia blinked at the barbs coming from Yoongi. She gasped when he suddenly turned around to look at her. “When Eden gets back, don’t tell her about this.”

“Huh? But why?”

“Please, Ana-ssi,” he said, his brows furrowing.

Swallowing the lump in her throat, she finally nodded – albeit reluctantly. Yoongi’s expression relaxed somewhat and he bowed his head.

“Thank you.” He then turned around to face Kihyun. “You’re done here, Kihyun-ah. You talk to me now.” Yoongi strolled past the other man, not so much as giving him a backwards glance. “Follow me.”

Kihyun smirked, winked at Anastasia, and then followed after Yoongi as was demanded of him. Anastasia wasn’t sure of what to make of that encounter, but she knew she would have to thank Yoongi properly when she got the chance. Kihyun’s smile may have been charming, but the way he carried himself suggested something cold and unfeeling.

It left a knot in Anastasia’s stomach.

Is he one of the guys Rae was talking about? she thought, frowning, …are they the ones trying to pull them back?

[the-last-airbadger]

My 2020

Hey y’all. So 2020 happened. That was a thing. Apparently. I know for a lot of people this year was uhm… pretty shit… but it was still a year that happened so it’s time for my annual reflection post (probably the only time I still post about myself on tumblr lol) and maybe we might even find some good things that happened this year!

 The Beginning of 2020 vs Now

So, a lot has changed since the start of the year. A pandemic happened, for one. I can’t believe that a year ago I could still go to class every day and see my friends and now I’m pretty much stuck at home every day. The year started out pretty normal and then march happened and well, you all know what happened next. The worst part about the pandemic for me personally was probably the fact that I barely see my friends anymore and I can’t go to class every day. Some people may not think that not going to class is that bad, but I really enjoyed university more than I ever enjoyed school and I was really happy going there every day, and I was already sad I’d only have 4 to 5 years to spend there, so when that period got even shorter it made me kinda sad.

On the other hand, I do think that mentally I’m in a much better place than I was last year around this time. Being home this much really gave me time to reflect and work on my issues, and because my sister was stuck in our house for a couple of weeks I got to talk to her a lot which really helped me feel better. I think in general my entire family (my brother, sister and mom) have become a lot more open with each other which I think is great! I guess quarantine can have some benefits.

 The Best Things about 2020

Okay, here’s is where we’re going to get even more positive and go over all the good things that happened (to me) this year! To be honest, most of the year was a bit of a blur so I probably will forget quite a bit, but I’m going to give this a try anyway. At the start of the year (when things were still normal) I was super excited to get into the next semester, as the one before had,,, kinda sucked, and those 6 weeks of class I had at the start of the year were really great. I remember me and my friends having a competition of who could get mentioned the most in our teacher’s powerpoint presentation so those classes were always interesting. I also finally got to dye my hair for the first time with the help of my friends. I’ve been wanting to do that for so long, and I’m so happy I finally got to do it! I even know how to do it myself now, and my hair hasn’t been brown since the start of march! Then, at the start of march, my dad and stepmother moved away and I permanently moved in with my mom. Before, I used to live with both my mom and my dad and I got really really sick of switching houses every week, so to finally live in one house and have all my stuff in one place was a bit of a relief to me, and I’m still really happy with it. After that, things become a bit blurry. I remember that at the start of quarantine in … April? I watched Sex Education or the first time, which is now not only one of my favourite shows ever, but also taught me a lot and helped me with some of the issues I was dealing with. We’ll skip over the subsequent sexuality crisis I had (I think I might actually be straight??), and skip straight to the summer, when I started watching I-Land. I watched every episode as it aired live, and because of this show my Fridays really became the highlight of the week. I don’t think I’ve ever been so invested in a survival show XD. The rest of the year was mostly just me spending time with myself. It got a bit lonely sometimes, but I also don’t think I’ve ever written as much as I have this year, and my drawing has significantly improved (if I may say so myself)! Especially towards the end of the year, when I started making a planning every day to prevent myself from wasting away all my time on youtube, I got super productive, and I wrote a lot, and made a lot of art, and I really felt good. I even started (gasp) working out. Yeah I know. Shocking right.

There was also a lot of good music that was released this year, and, to close this section on a great note, through one of my classes I finally found a group of friends to play D&D with! We haven’t actually played yet, but we will, and I’m so excited to play the game and get to know these people more! They all seem really kind!

 My Resolutions for 2020?

Now, here’s the part where we check whether I actually reached all the goals I set myself for 2020. As usual, I have no idea what my resolutions were, so I honestly have no idea how I did. Let’s see, shall we?

Express my feelings more (as in I get really awkward in any sappy or mushy situation but I would like to be able to tell people I appreciate them without cringing) – UHM way to attack me on the very first resolution jeez. I did get more open with my family but I still can’t tell people I care about them without cringing so this is a fail lol

Again, learn to depend less on other people’s opinion and trust my own – I’ve been working on it, I think I’ve gotten a bit better? So win?

Get my sleeping schedule back on track – did that! It’s a bit whacky again now because of the holidays, but October and November were a big success regarding this resolution

WRITE MORE. This time I’ll make some concrete goals: Either I’ll get my story’s first draft done, or I’ll write 100 pages on a single project – okay, so here’s the thing. I don’t think I did any of these particular things, however this time I am 100% sure I wrote a lot more than the past years. I cannot count all the files and pages and notes I have now, but I wrote a lot, so I’m counting this as a win

I want to try NaNoWriMo (not necessarily in November, but at some point) – yeah, didn’t do that oops

I want to read a lot again but maybe not as much as this year because I want to focus on writing too. 40 books? – 49 books babey

Read all my current unread books (Aru Shah 2, Skullduggery Pleasant 9, Gemina, The Mistborn Trilogy and Call Down The Hawk) and finish my reread of Heroes of Olympus and the Raven Cycle) – Did all of these except Skullduggery Pleasant 9 (the start was so boring I decided not to read it all) and The Mistborn Trilogy (I am about halfway through the first book I think?) so I’m counting this as half a win

Finally read a book by V.E. Schwab (I’ve been wanting to try one of her books for ages) – Did that! Read a whole trilogy. It was good but not as great as I expected them to be. I think my expectations were too high though

Finish Playing Twilight Princess (I promised my brother) – Did that! I’m really proud of myself and so is my brother

Go. Swimming. Seriously. It’s scandalous that I still haven’t done that after waiting so long to be able to – IT’S BEEN 5 YEARS SINCE I LAST WENT SWIMMING WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME. I did buy new swimshorts but I still haven’t actually used them… shame on me

Try to worry less about school and not overwork myself – kinda?

Maybe try another drawing challenge somewhere this summer? I haven’t done any of those in a while and I feel like my art needs more attention – okay, so I didn’t do that, but I did at the start of the year make the resolution to make portrait/photoshoot-like drawings for my 8 main oc’s, and I did actually manage to finish that, and they are some of the best drawings I’ve ever made, so though I haven’t actually done a challenge specifically, I did do something

I want to try a 24 hour readathon – Yeah, didn’t do that oops

I kinda want to learn a piano piece as well, but I already have so many hobbies I want to focus on so I don’t know if I’ll have the time ☹ – yeah my dad sold our piano so… fail XD

 Expectations for 2021

Now, after last year I think it’s safe to say we can never really know what to expect. But! I’m going to guess anyway because it’ll be really fun to see next year whether I got anything right.

The first thing that I think will probably happen this year (if I don’t majorly mess anything up) is I’ll be writing my thesis next semester, and then in the summer I’ll get my bachelor’s degree. Honestly I can’t believe how fricking fast those 3 years went, but I guess I’ll just have to roll with it lol. Corona vaccinations will also probably start happening next year, and hopefully this will mean that going outside and seeing my friends will be possible again next year – at least a lot more than it was this year. I hope 2021 will be the year of hanging out with friends and getting to live a little again. Maybe even get to go to class. That would be great.

On to more minor – but no less exciting – things, 2021 will probably bring us a new season of Sex Education! I’m sooo excited for that holy shit. And, in a similar vein, I have high hopes for kpop releases now that SHINee is finally back, and it looks like Haseul is also returning to LOONA! 2021 will also be the year in which ENHYPEN makes their first comeback, and some of the other I-LAND contestants will also make their debut, and there might even be a new season of I-LAND as well in the summer? So there’s a lot of things to look forward to. Oh, and I almost forgot, Dan Howell’s book will be released in May, and there will be a new Grishaverse book, and the Shadow and Bone show will start airing, which I am really curious about. Again, lots of things to look forward to!

 2021 Resolutions

I’m not feeling as ambitious as I was last year, but there are a couple of things I want to try and do, so let’s jump into the resolutions!

I just came up with this today, but I think I want to try and build a bit of a skincare routine? The skin on my nose is kinda flakey, and I think it couldn’t hurt to try and take better care of my skin

Keep up with my daily workouts. I want to work out every day, except when I’m at my dad’s or when it’s a special day, like Christmas or something.

Be able to do either 50 push-ups on my knees, 25 normal push-ups, or both

GO SWIMMING

Keep up with planning daily! It’s a really good way to balance all of my 3195 hobbies and it helps me to not get stressed about school

Write (almost) every day. I need to make it a habit

Draw at least once a week, every other day if possible

Go outside at least once a week. That doesn’t seem very hard but with corona I did not realise how little I go outside if I am not forced to. Sometimes I spend 3 weeks without going out and I don’t even notice it. That can’t be good for me lol

Try to make healthier food choices. Maybe follow the lunch meal plan of the guy whose workout videos I follow.

Get my bachelor’s degree

Grow a beard. I’m getting closer… I know I’m getting closer…

Meet with my frIENDS and give them the alBUMS I have for them

Be more careful with my money, maybe even save a bit of money

Spend less time on social media

Read more educational books

I think that’s it! I can’t think of anything else right now so these will have to do. I wish that 2021 will treat all of you much better than whatever mess 2020 was! Happy 2021!

Last year’s post: (x)

@the-official-pentacorn @asiandutchgirl

[themoonstarwarrior]

PLAYLIST SHUFFLE TAG!

Okay, so @viterbofangirl tagged me in this and I need to start learning to post my own shit, so what the hell, why not?

Rules: you can usually tell a lot about a person by the type of music they listen to! put your favorite playlist on shuffle and list the first 10 15 songs, then tag 10 people. no skipping!

(I couldn’t stop at 10 so I added 5 more, sue me)

I have very random music taste and I listen to my music on shuffle alot, so I made a playlist of the ones I like the most (that way I don’t hafta skip 150 songs to get to the one I feel like) so I’m gonna use that one.

1) History of Violence - Theory of a Deadman

Hoo boy starting off light huh?.... Yeah so, I was in the drive thru at Sonic when I first heard this on the radio and was immediately like “holy shit”. Instead of like metaphors and poetic subtlety, it’s just straight up like “here’s a poor abused woman who resorted to murdering her shitty boyfriend/husband cuz she couldn’t take it dum dum dum”. Even though the actual situation is not the same, this song is perfect for getting across the internal issues and turmoil of my character Mikey. Its so perfect I’m even planning to animate something for it...... if I ever get around to learning animation that is.....     

2) The Vengeful One - Disturbed

Two songs in and I look kinda emo.... But hey this song is soooooo cathartic! I love me a good heavy rock song, and the drums and electric guitar are perfect for my ears to absorb. This song gives off a feeling of overwhelming power mixed with a coldness and disdain for the bad in the world. Obviously, thats not my usual temperment, but its an interesting one to explore! Especially when I’m trying to get into the head of characters that exude that like my OCs Spark or Ryu. Plus its fun to sing in the car X)

3) Enter Sandman - Metallica

Okay this one is just a classic! Same thing with the drums and guitar they both slap SOOOOO GOOD. I don’t really associate this song with any of my characters or fandom favorites, but it DOES give me a super strong urge to learn the drums. EXXXXXXXXIT LIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! OFF TO NEVER NEVERLAND!!

4) We Are Giants - Lindsey Stirling ft. Dia Frampton

I don’t really to listen to music by band or artist, but I LOVE Lindsey Stirling!!! She’s probably my favorite musician! This is such a good song, especially for someone like me. Its a positive song that talks about feeling alone in a crowd and unimportant to the world, but how you really do matter and shouldn’t be afraid to dream big and shoot for the stars. It really speaks to me and the vocalization is so good (especially for singing), not to mention the official music video is animated and AMAZING!

5) Cetus - Lensko NCS

I dunno if anyone knows this song, but damn its good. Its one of those Royalty-Free songs that people look up for their channels, which is how I found it in the first place, but I loved it immediately. Its a peppy 8-bit electronic bop that turns a little Irish jig at the end and honestly I think if I ever start an animation channel I’m totally gonna use it! (Also go support Lensko he make good beats!)

6) Sanctuary - Utada Hikaru

I did not grow up with Kingdom Hearts, and only played KH2 within the past year n’ a half. But good God, the moment that Cinematic Opening came on and this song started playing I swear I astral projected into a daze of feelings without names. I know that “Simple and Clean” is the quintessential Kingdom Heart song that gives everyone feelings, but IMHO Sanctuary blows it out of the water. As beautiful as the animation was, or how curious the occasional backwards lyrics are, or how weird it is having high-res Goofy and Donald in what is essentially an anime opening, I really can’t be distracted from this song when I play.

7) Chemical Plant Zone (Rock Remix) - Zerobadniks

Chemical Plant Song is like, one of the TOP Sonic songs by popular vote (and we know how awesome the Sonic series is musically so thats saying something!), but I could never quite vibe with the normal 8-bit version. I think I first heard this as someone’s ringtone and was immediately like “THATS PERFECT THATS EXACTLY HOW I NEED IT!”. The rock makes the song soooo much better and honestly gives the song the perfect vibe. Unfortunately, it took FOREVER to find cuz none of the Rock Covers of this song were the right one. In fact, tbh, I’m not even sure whether Zerobadniks is the correct artist..... that’s just who everybody was crediting when I found it. 

(imma include the link i found since its a little hard to find: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fqJiZEM6aPI )

8) The Wolf - SIAMES

YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT ANIMATED MUSIC VIDEOS???? THIS IS A GOD-TIER ANIMATED MUSIC VIDEO. I found the video first, and seriously, if you haven’t seen it YOU NEED TO!!! The beat works perfectly with the images on screen and the story being portrayed is really intriguing, with the lyrics adding to atmosphere without necessarily describing the visuals shown. Even without the animation, the song itself is a banger. It bring to mind the feeling of intense motion forward, but unable to decide whether its movement TOWARD something or AWAY from something. I love listening to this on a nighttime drive.

9) Burn the House Down - AJR

If you ask me, the best way to make a pop song better is to add either violins or trumpets. For this song, it was definitely the trumpets that first caught my attention, and the rest of the song kept me listening. I don’t really know how to describe the vibe of this song, and I don’t have a specific character or story in mind when I listen to it, so its a little hard for me to talk about it. I think the best way I can describe this song and what draws me to it is a feeling of nonchalant go-with-the-flow attitude to shenaniganry. Almost an undertone of “We’re hooligans in a situation that we probably should get out of, but hey we’ve got life and each other so why worry?” At least that’s the closest I can get to a verbal description heh...

10) Slim Pickens Does the Right Thing and Rides the Bomb to Hell - The Offspring 

DANCE, FUCKER, DANCE, LET THE MOTHERFUCKER BURN!!!

So this also has a KICKASS animated music video, but its technically combined with the song “Dividing by Zero”. Now the video works SO well with both, and the shifting artstyles reflect the differing tones of the songs PERFECTLY. However, I have a preference for both the animation and the song on the Slim Pickens half. Its fun to listen to and sing at the top of your lungs and its SO CATHARTIC. Again I cant really describe what my head does when I hear it, but I think you can probably feel a similar vibe if you watch the music video. 

11) No Heaven - DJ Champion

The first time I finished the original Borderlands, I had been playing for days on end, had just finished a long battle with the Destroyer, and sitting back relieved to have beaten it and reflecting on how much I had enjoyed the adventure. Then this song started playing. For what I believe was forty minutes this song looped on my TV while the credits rolled. By the time the credits finished I was pulling up the song to listen to again! What an absolutely PERFECT cherry to add to this experience. This song perfectly encapsulated the chaotic, trigger-happy, morally ambiguous craziness that I had enjoyed and absorbed in this game. Every time I hear it now, I imagine myself in the wastelands of Pandora, driving haphazardly across the sandy dunes as my companions and I shoot and blow up everything in sight. You know, living the dream.......     

12) Hit & Run (Wolfgang Lohr Remix) -  The Electric Swing Circus

I fucking LOVE electro-swing! The electronic beats and rhythm blend so well with the wild and energetic freedom of swing. A lot of electro-swing gives me a vibe of wild movement, reckless abandon, and freedom from constraint. I think this song melds all of these feelings the best! As the last song might have indicated, despite my general nice and sweet temperament, there is a part of me deep down that is an absolute gremlin secretly enamored with chaos, insanity, and a general disdain for law and authority X). But whereas anything Borderlands related has a more “morality is an illusion blowing shit up is real” air about it, this song is far more peppy. More of a “good-hearted but insane” type of chaos, like an 100mph car chase where you end up sailing over the train tracks JUST as the train passes.

.... I may have gotten a bit off track lol 

13) Kickstart my Heart - Motley Crue

I love this song, but I have to be VERY careful when and where I listen to this. I love songs that make me feel like I’m going a million miles per hour, like I’m gotdam Sonic the Hedgehog. Unfortunately, I may or may not have had multiple instances of listening to this song in the car and abruptly realizing that I’m going like 15mph above the speed limit...... So yeah, regardless of absolutely perfect it feels to play this song while speeding down a nearly empty highway, please be careful and drive responsibly!!!

14) I’m Born to Run - American Authors

Imma just up and say it. This song is a Sonic song; like not like actually from the series but a song for the character. This song encapsulates Sonic as a character better than some of his ACTUAL THEMES (and remember Sonic music are bangers!). Its a song about freedom, living life as it comes, and not letting anything slow you down. Frankly I’m surprised they didn’t make this song FOR the Sonic series, or even the movie! Speaking of which, ironically I heard this song right after watching the Sonic movie in theaters, so yeah there’s no way I can associate it with anything else. 

15) Opa Opa - Antique

Oh, what a PERFECT way to end this list! This may be one of my absolute favorite songs of all time! I don’t remember exactly how I found this song... I think I had just relistened to Dalar Mehndi’s “Tunak Tunak Tun” and was looking for other catchy non-english songs and BOY HOWDY I found one! I know nothing about the band or what the song’s about (its in greek and i dont speak it), but this song is just a masterpiece of retro, pop, and dance sounds. This song feels like the musical and lyrical manifestation of dance and movement. I really REALLY wish I could dance JUST so I can express how happy and free this song makes me feel! This is the BEST song for me to end this list with!

***********************************************************************************

JESUS, this got long..... Sorry about that XD. It was fun though, and hopefully somebody was vaguely interested in my ramblings.

Guess I need to tag people now? How about @tharkflark1, @rockmilkshake, @neonbuck, @drawingsdrawingseverywhere, @birthgiverofbirds, @puccafangirl, @kalcat, @biblestudybussybopsbabey, @monstrous-milktea, and @memecage! I think there are a couple of people here I haven’t talked to though soooooo..... hi, I hope you don’t mind the tag X)

 Anyway hope you enjoyed and/or want to do this too! This took for-fucking-EVER to type, so imma go fuck off and watch youtube or something now...

[callunavulgari]

TOP 25 FICS OF 2019

1. these roads will take you into your own country by @notbecauseofvictories | American Gods | Laura Moon/Mad Sweeney | WIP | 33k

Here’s a joke for you: a Muslim, a zombie, and a leprechaun walk into a bar in Misery, Indiana. No one stares, because no one in the puckered, shitty asshole of Misery, Indiana gives a fuck. The Colts are playing.

Heather Says: So. It’s funny that another of @notbecauseofvictories‘s stories is at the top of my list again this year. Keep in mind this list is sorted by when the fic was read rather than favorites (because that would get real complicated real quick). Clearly there must be something about January. There’s just something about the writing that is easy to slip into, be it a Star Wars fic or a Labyrinth fic or even a fic about Johnny and the Devil. This was lovely and I can’t wait until it’s finished.

2. eighteen wheels on an uphill climb by @honkforhankcon | Detroit: Become Human | Hank/Connor | 91k

Hank is going to die. He’s going to die right here in Kentucky, 53 years old, halfway to broke, and tragically sober. Survived only by a nine-year-old St. Bernard and the 31-year-old twink who delivered the fatal blow.

Heather Says: I don’t think that this is the first DBH fic that I sought out after beating the game, but it is the first that I loved enough to make it to this list. I didn’t think that I would go for a modern au for this fandom, certainly not a modern au wihere Hank is a truck driver and Connor is a sex worker (albeit briefly?) but here I am.

3. Fuck pride (pride only hurts, it never helps) by ImogenGotDrunk | Detroit: Become Human | RK900/Gavin Reed | 41k

After the android uprising, Connor becomes a permanent fixture in the DPD. That’s fine. Gavin can accept that. The dipshit’s more human than he used to be, and a decent detective to boot. Gavin can deal with him being around. What Gavin cannot deal with is Connor’s replica; two inches taller, blue-eyed, and with a mouth that Gavin doesn’t know whether to punch or take between his teeth. The RK900 model has been assigned as his partner for the foreseeable future.

Heather Says: I also never thought that I’d like a fic with Gavin in it. But I got curious about all the Reed900, and well, this fic really won me over. The writing is fantastic, and it softens Gavin while still keeping him believable. Also, well, I like the enemies to lovers thing.

4. Almost Cool by @blacktofade | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 30k

While filming the Yuma Territorial Prison episode, Shane gets bitten by what he thinks is a bat. Spoiler alert: it's not.

Heather Says: This is actually the first thing that I read for this fandom. In fact, this is the fic that got me into Buzzfeed Unsolved in the first place. I’d seen a lot of art and gifs and fics pass my way, but I was only ever slightly interested in what I saw until this fic came through my inbox and piqued my curiosity. 

5. Pride by @astolat | Game of Thrones | Jaime/Brienne/Cersei | 22k

Jaime didn’t understand why Cersei suddenly insisted on trimming his hair and shaving his beard, but he also didn’t care to fight her on it, even though he’d just as soon have kept the beard: it was bitterly cold in the small tower room with its arrow-slits. 

Heather Says: Wowza. This fic was intense. I’ve always loved Jaime and Brienne. I’ve loved them since the second book, which was read at least a few years before I started loving them in the show. Adding Cersei to their dynamic would have probably been almost impossible to pull off if it was anyone else, but @astolat lives to surpass my expectations.

6. Skin and Scales by Ernmark | The Penumbra Podcast | Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla | 18k

The man glares, and this time, Damien is certain it isn’t a trick of the light: those eyes are violet as amethyst. He wears disdain like a second skin–- or, perhaps, like the scales that he is missing. “Lord Arum?”

Heather Says: I was one of those people who skipped through all of the Second Citadel episodes during my first listen through of Penumbra. The stories were good, but the pull of Juno was too great. A couple months after I finished, I went back and listened to everything I didn’t. And let me tell you. Lizard monster. Honorable knight. Bookish girlfriend. Poly. It hit every single button I had and then some. This fic really hit the spot when I ran out of story.

7. someone you like by caela | She-Ra | Adora/Catra | 5k

catwithabat u think ur so hipster but u just look like a lesbian 27m she_ra @catwithabat bc… i’m a lesbian. lmao 5m

Heather Says: Noooot usually a big fan of high school fics. Namely because I’m not in high school anymore and well, after you read so many in your teenage years they sort of lose their luster. This one was phenomenal enough to change my mind.

8. Sands of Time by @tirsynni | Legend of Zelda | Ganondorf/Link | WIP | 98k

Link awakens in the desert with no idea how he got there, to encounter his worst enemy...except it was the King of the Gerudo, not the King of Evil, he faced.

Heather Says: I have seen a lot of really good Link/Ganondorf art over the years, but never really stumbled across a fic that didn’t have judicious amount of non-con involved. But the Breath of the Wild 2 trailer happened, and everybody started drawing really pretty art, so I went looking. And lo and behold, @tirsynni saved the day with this gorgeous time travel/fix-it fic. 

9. killed with kindness by veterization | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 52k

Goro can't quite figure out why so many people keep acting like they're his friend. (Or: the one where the Phantom Thieves decide to know thy enemy, befriend thy enemy, love thy enemy, crush on thy enemy).

Heather Says: I’ve read a couple of veterization’s fics over the years, and to date they have never disappointed me. They published this in June, and I think I clicked on it mostly because I was bored and hadn’t read any good P5 fic yet. This was basically just what the doctor ordered, and I was really happy to find something where Akechi’s story went ever so slightly different.

10. paper thin by @ebonybow | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane/Sara | 9k

Shane’s new neighbors are a morning-sex kind of couple.

Heather Says: So I went into this one knowing very little about how Sara fit into things. I didn’t know she was Shane’s girlfriend. I’d never even seen her, but I clicked because I like poly and I trust the author. I was 100% not disappointed. There’s also another fic with a very similar dynamic here, which is also aces.

11. damn.nation, now available on itunes by @kaikamahine | Good Omens | Aziraphale/Crowley | 11k

When lowly tempt-pusher Amphora (formerly of Stairwell 7B North, before she Fell,) gets the notice that end times are nigh, she gleefully quits her job and cancels her Netflix subscription and takes her place among the legions of hell. This, it turns out, was a bad plan.

Heather Says: Elizabeth may have only written one fic this year, but she made it a damn good one. I’ve always loved her OCs especially, so I was pretty tickled that this is 10k+ of outsider pov. Also, demons! Demons are great! This demon is great! I want like 9 seasons and a movie about Amphora, just saying.

12. The Dragon and Her Wolves by hapakitsune | Game of Thrones | Jon/Sansa/Daenarys | 60k

When the truth of Jon's birthright is revealed, control of the North and Daenerys's claim to the Iron Throne are both called into question. To preserve their tenuous alliance and secure her rule, Daenerys puts aside her personal feelings to arrange a marriage of political convenience between Jon and Sansa Stark.

Heather Says: What do you mean season 8 didn’t exist and the show totally ended with a three way relationship between the two most powerful women in Westeros and Jon Snow? Never been a big fan of Jon/Sansa before this, but this is another of those writers that I would literally trust if they wrote a fic about a fork and a spoon.

13. never tell me the odds by @wildehacked | Wolf 359 | Eiffel/Hera | 9k

“I tried Star Wars," he says, adjusting the phone under his neck, "and it was way underwhelming.”

A shaky breath from her end. “Well, where did you start?”

Heather Says: I don’t remember which of @wildehacked‘s fandoms I started reading first. Most recently it’s been The Magnus Archives (more on this later). The point is, they’d written Wolf 359 fic and it had Hera and Eiffel and it was literally everything that I’ve been looking for since the series ended.

14. Find Me Somebody by raiining | Good Omens | Warlock/Adam Young | 11k

“You left me,” he said. “You both left me, for him. And I can’t even blame you, because I’d have left me for him too.”

Heather Says: There was an Art. The art was lovely. So I went looking, because that’s what I do when faced with beautiful art depicting a rare pairing. And I found the holy grail. Like, possibly my favorite Good Omens fic? Ever? 

15. flirting with fire by @brawlite | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | WIP | 7k

Steve's a cop, Billy's a firefighter. It's not a grudge, it's just a regular old small town rivalry.

Heather Says: Okay so brawlite has written a lot of great stuff this year (more on that later), but I read this in bed at the beach house this August while I was reeling from both a horrible sunburn and like seven hours of mild to moderate day-drinking while everyone else was still throwing back shots right outside my bedroom door. Jaws was playing on the tv and I wasn’t even paying attention to it, because THIS. Long story short, I’ve been thirsty for more ever since.

16. gold, when you find me by mmtion | The Flash | Iris/Barry | 53k

It's not that Iris hates The Flash, per say - more that she hates writing about The Streak in a weekly, pun-heavy comic based on The Flash.

Heather Says: I never would have thought that a canon pairing would make it to my Top 25 list, but here we are. I like Iris/Barry a lot better when they don’t grow up together and spend a lot of time playing the Superman game, apparently. Also, this was really well-written, and sexual tension has never been something I’ve felt from Barry and Iris, but I felt it in this fic. Just. Damn.

17. never gets old by @brawlite & @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger| Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 78k

Falling in love with a cam boy named KingSteve isn't the smartest thing Billy Hargrove has ever done, nor is it the most healthy -- but the good choice is rarely ever the fun choice, and Billy is all about living life fast and loose.

Heather Says: Told you I’d come back to it. brawlite and toastranger are a fantastic team. last year was cherry pie and under the covers, this year it’s camboys and cop/firefighter dynamics. Also, I have a really strange fascination with fics where a character has an instragram. It’s really, incredibly strange. Also also, every time I see this fic title I get that one Discovery Channel song stuck in my head. And no, it probably isn’t the one you’re thinking.

18. ways to save the world by @wildehacked | The Magnus Archives | Martin Blackwood/Jon Sims | 19k

“I left you,” Martin says softly.

Heather Says: And we’re back at wildehacked too! The Magnus Archives was a thing that happened to me. This is I think the first fic I read for it while listening, and it was so very close to what we got in canon. I think when it comes down to it though, I still prefer this fic, even if the ending of this season was pretty fantastic.

19. The Denial Twist by beethechange | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 35k

“This is kind of surreal,” Shane says, taking a sip of his tea. It’s piping hot and delicious, except it tastes like hot chocolate and not like tea at all. “Sort of—Wonka-esque, right? Or Alice in Wonderland.”

Heather Says: While the vampire one is my favorite both because it is excellent and because it was my first, this one was bizarre and sexy and also I read it like only a month or so ago! The dancing was my favorite part, but having dreams to work with made this story fantastically interesting and I loved every second of it.

20. silver in our lungs by taywen | Spinning Silver | Miryem/The Staryk Lord | 4k

The marks had been with Miryem for as long as she could remember. There were a number of them, all the same shade, following one after the other around her left wrist. They were pale as old scars, though they felt no different from the rest of her skin, and her mother claimed that Miryem had been born with them.

Heather Says: I really like soulmate aus. There’s so many different ways to twist them and the way they can sometimes change the dynamic entirely and other times not change them at all is just fascinating. I’ve been hoping there would be more Spinning Silver content on ao3 and running into this while I was trying to decide what I wanted to do for yuletide was a real treat.

21. you got me begging, begging, i'm on my knees by plalligator | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 5k

Costis has a particularly enlightening evening. (or, that struggle when you're a guard who's in love with your rulers and it turns out you would kind of like it if they bossed you around a little)

Heather Says: I accidentally re-read the King of Attolia and it made me consider ships I had perhaps not previously considered. This was really lovely and just steamy enough.

22. something more alive than silence by pageleaf | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 21k

It was a good thing that six months after the king had promised to halve the guard, he still hadn’t done it, because since then, there had been two attempts on the king’s life.

Heather Says: I want to only type the words AGONIZED NOISES to describe this fic because that’s basically my headspace when I get 21k of a shiny new ot3, but I mean. Really. This is super good and maybe my favorite yet? Why didn’t I start reading this fandom when I first read the books?

23. Timing it Right by DragonBandit | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 14k

The dragon chooses, Mark knows that as well as any boy born in a weyr. He'd never considered what that would mean if the dragon picked someone you hated. He's starting to think that was a mistake.

Damien's gold rises at Whitney. Mark tries to make things right.

Heather Says: This should actually be somewhere back in March, but I apparently closed out of the tab at some point. I never really got into Pern much. I have the first three books, but got most of the way through the first one a long time ago and then never picked it back up. I didn’t think I would like this, mostly because of the fact that I hadn’t gotten into the books, but was surprised to find that I absolutely loved it.

24. Keep It In Your Sights Now by LuckyDiceKirby | Shades of Magic | Lila/Kell/Holland | 9k

Holland travels with Lila and Kell. Somewhere along the way, they reach an equilibrium.

Heather Says: I love the new things I’ve discovered during my yuletide trompings. I don’t think I ever actually considered this pairing when I first read the books, but I am just so enamored with the idea of the three of them together. Like, why did I not realize that potential back then? This was lovely, and I loved it, and I want so much more out of this pairing than what ao3 has to offer me.

25. Charioteer by petrichoral | The Queen’s Thief | Gen & Costis | 13k

Captured in battle and stuck in the Mede capital, Costis has given up all hope of seeing his country again. But Eugenides has a habit of turning up where he's least expected.

Heather Says: Technically this shouldn’t be on here because I only read it today, but it was really wonderful and so canon typical. Gen and Costis were perfect in it, Irene was perfect in it. Everyone was perfect and nothing hurts.