#i already have problems focusing and getting chores and stuff done one the weekends on it's own

[a-s-levynn]

Just so you know, if i disappear i either jumped off the roof or finally snapped and murdered my upper floor neighbours.

[dadgonedeku]

Todoroki and kirishima with a s/o who comes back from training with her back and neck sore but she takes care of him and he notice by her actions that she’s not doing well and then he takes care of her

Todoroki + Kirishima taking care of physically exhausted s/o!

❄️~Hi lovely!! I hope these are okay! I apologize it’s so late!! 😭

🔥~SFW & Fem!Reader (fem!pronouns were used!)

🥊~Happy Reading!

Shouto Todoroki❄️🔥

❄️~ Training had been especially rough for the past few days, Aizawa not letting up on pushing you and your classmates beyond your limits.

🔥~ You were exhausted to say the least, as soon as training was over for the day you grabbed your stuff and practically limped to the locker room.

❄️~ Your back was killing you, so much so that you wouldn’t be surprised if you had broken or fractured something. Of course you hadn’t, but it sure felt like it. Every time you stretched or adjusted your posture a shooting pain would radiate through your upper body.

🔥~ Your boyfriend, however, was holding up pretty well. Psh, of course he was, he always did. It was rare when Todoroki got hurt or even exhausted during training. He was one of the strongest in the class, and you were right behind him. For some reason though, today just wasn’t your day.

❄️~ When you exited the locker room holding your costume case you spotted him waiting for you across the hall, typing on his phone leaning up against the plain walls of the school. Since Aizawa was satisfied with everyone’s work for the week, he decided to let you all go back to the dorms early for the weekend. Thank goodness.

🔥~ Your eyes met his and he flashed you a soft smile before tucking his phone into one of his pockets and picking up his own case. You met in the middle of the hallway and walked together. He took your free hand in his gently, and you almost instantly felt a little bit better.

❄️~ “Are you alright s/o?” He asked you curiously, and you only nodded in response. You didn’t want to worry him, if anything you wanted to ask him the same thing. Maybe some sleep and pain medicine would get rid of your back and neck pain. It was a chore to even hold your head up.

🔥~ Of course he could tell you were holding back, in your sparring match against Bakugou you pretty much got thrown all over the place. The force of his explosions almost never failed to send his opponents flying in one way or another. He never held back, especially against girls. You couldn’t help but be kind of grateful for that though, it made you feel tough.

❄️~ “Are you sure?” He asks again, worry lacing his words. Part of you wants to be honest and tell him you’re in pain. It hurts to walk, turn your head, and even stand up straight. You choke it down and swallow your pride, maybe taking care of him will help you feel better.

🔥~ “I’m fine Sho, let’s just head back so I can wrap up those cuts for you.” He barely even had any, and the ones he received in his match were minor, barely even bleeding. He knew something was up. Your posture was stiff and your shoulders were tense. You were walking a little weird too, but of course you always prioritized him over yourself. He couldn’t help but be a little resentful towards your lack of self care. He left it alone though, deciding that fighting you about it now wouldn’t accomplish anything.

❄️~ When the two of you arrived back at the dorms hand in hand, he noticed how you immediately start to head to your dorm instead of talking with the rest of the girls like usual. It had become a little habit of yours to talk with them every other day or so in the common room, but today you just didn’t have the energy. That made him worried, were you okay? Did he do anything wrong?

🔥~ He heads to his own dorm, following you upstairs. It was pure luck your rooms were on the same floor, it made sneaking sleepovers and movie nights easier. “You sure you’re okay s/o?”

❄️~ “Yes Sho, just let me borrow the first aid kit you have.” He responds with a quick okay before opening the door to his dorm, letting you in first before closing the door behind himself. You had grown to have your own little collection of clothes, personal products, etc in his room and honestly, he found it really cute. He notices you struggle to bend down to your backpack to get clothes for yourself. You just wanted to change, all you wanted to do was change, take care of your boyfriend, and sleep. You forced yourself to hold tears back from spilling over as you gave up, your back hurt too much, it was just too much.

🔥~ “S/o? What’s wrong?” He asks, and you break. The pain is overwhelming. You finally crack and tell him everything while trying to massage your aching neck with one hand. He only responds with a frown, making his way over to you and wrapping his arms gently around you. It hurts a little, but you’re instantly met with contrasting warm and cool sensations. It feels so good.

❄️~ “Sit on the edge of the bed, I’m gonna get a heating pad and some medicine from my bag. No objections.” He says bluntly before guiding you over his bed, begrudgingly you sit down best you can and put your face in your hands. Heating pad? Meds? Potential cuddles with your boyfriend? You were all for it, it was almost too good to be true. The only problem, you were still in your uniform and he was already changed, you wanted more comfy clothes.

🔥~ “Sho?” He responds with a hum, and you can almost see the small smile on his features as he digs through his closet. “Can you pass me my bag? I wanna get my comfy clothes so I can change.” He pokes his head from behind one of the doors before asking you to wait a moment. A few moments pass and he walks back over to you. In his arms are the heating pad, one of his hoodies, and a pair of his sweatpants. “These okay?” He asks, and you smile at him as he passes you his clothes and moves to plug the heating pad in, he helps you up and you change as fast as you can in the bathroom.

❄️~ When you come back out he’s already laying down waiting for you, heating pad resting on your side of the bed and a cold water bottle in his hand. It feels like a dream. You walk over to him and he helps you get back into bed, a comforting hand taking yours while the other gently supports the small of your back as you lay down. With a groan you assume the position, and he hands you the water bottle to drink from and a couple of pain pills to swallow.

🔥~ “You did really good today s/o, so please don’t hide things like this from me. I want to take care of you when you need it.” You’re almost in tears on the spot and you can feel the pain is already fading, slowly but surely. You had the best boyfriend ever. You thank him and reach your arms out, a silent request for snuggles. He flashes you another small smile before gently wrapping his arms around you, a cool hand rubbing smooth circles into the back of your neck. He places short kisses on your forehead, telling you how proud he is of you. The nap afterwards is heaven.

Eijirou Kirishima🥊

🥊~ “S/o, are you sure you’re okay? Today’s training was tough and you look really tired.” He asks for the 3rd time, and you just nod your head in response.

🥊~ You were busy patching up a small gash on his shoulder, one he had aquired earlier that afternoon during training. Aizawa had been relentless in his drills for the past couple days, and every night you would tend to Kiri’s cuts and bruises in his bathroom. He never knew about your own though, you didn’t want to worry him.

🥊~ Of all nights to have back and neck pain it had to be this one, and it sucked. It hurt to just keep your head up, but of course you kept it to yourself. Kiri’s physical wounds were worse than your pain right? That’s what you had convinced yourself of anyway.

🥊~ “Almost done Ei, can you pass me the ace bandage on the counter?” You hold out a hand and he nods, taking said bandage in his palm before dropping it accidentally. It rolls to the floor beside you and before he can even apologize you’re bending down to get it.

🥊~ Wrong move.

🥊~ As soon as you turn your body you let out a yelp of pain, tears pricking the corners of your eyes as you rush a hand to support your back. Kirishima is taken off guard, eyes wide and focused on you as he takes your free hand in his.

🥊~ “Babe are you okay? What’s wrong?” A worried gaze comes into view as he pulls you back upright, and you can’t help but fall over and lean your head on his chest. You’re so exhausted, your back and neck hurt like they never have before. All you want to do is lay down and sleep, but Kiri’s shoulder came first.

🥊~ “Sorry, I’m okay. My back just hurts a little.” You groan out, Kirishima bends down really quickly and picks up the bandage. Easy, he did it so easily. Why couldn’t you do it? You both had the same training right? Why was he better off than you? You couldn’t help but be at least a little curious.

🥊~ “You wouldn’t have reacted like that if it was just a little. Come on, let’s go get you some medicine and then we can cuddle.” He gives you a toothy grin before standing up and putting away the bandage.

🥊~ “Ei I’m fine, I promise. Just sit down and-“

🥊~ “Nope, no ifs, ands, or butts. I’m gonna help you and there’s no getting out of it. Come on babe, stand up for me.” He holds out a calloused hand for you to take in your own, and you do, not after rolling your eyes though.

🥊~ “But what about your arm? At least let me-“

🥊~ “I’ll be fine, it stopped bleeding anyways. You’re more important.” He gently ushers you to bed, and thank goodness you’re already in pajamas when you lay down, if you weren’t you didn’t think you ever get back up to change. He asks you to wait a moment before opening his mini fridge, he grabs a water bottle and tosses it onto the bed before heading to his desk drawer.

🥊~ Also known as the snack drawer.

🥊~ Why he had snacks in his desk drawer? You didn’t exactly know, but they always came in handy whenever you would sneak into his room to sleepover.

🥊~ He pulls out a package of your favorite snack before grabbing the water bottle and sitting down next to you. He opens the bottle and urges to drink, setting the snack on your lap for you to open and eat at your leisure.

🥊~ “Drink, you’re exhausted, staying hydrated is important.” Of course he would say something like that, being the fitness geek he is. He was 100% right though, so instead of arguing you just took the bottle and sipped from it.

🥊~ He props your neck up with a couple pillows and you relax against the soft material of the pillow cases. They are cool and soothing against the skin of your neck, and you nearly wallow in the relief.

🥊~ “Feel better babe?” Kirishima asks you with a side smile, he’s laying on his side now, facing you and holding one of your smaller hands in his again. He always knew how to make you feel better, no matter the day. You were eternally grateful.

🥊~ “Much, thank you. You didn’t have to do this you know.” His expression drops at your statement and you pause mid sip. You wonder why his crimson eyes are full of concern again. Did you say something wrong?

🥊~ “Babe, you always take care of me. You deserve the same, not only because you’re my girlfriend but because I love you and I wanna make sure you’re okay. Giving your body rest is important. Besides, taking care of you always makes me happy.” It had been a while since you’d heard him say something so serious, but even so it tugged at your heart strings. You only nodded, closing the water bottle and placing it on the table next to the side of the bed along with the snack. As if on cue he wraps his arms around you and you rest your head on his chest. You almost fall asleep right then and there.

🥊~ “Thank you Ei, I love you too.” He kisses your forehead and rubs gentle circles into your back. The pain has gone down a little, but it still lingers, and you let out a wince when he brings up a couple fingers to touch your neck.

🥊~ “You okay s/o? I can massage your neck too if you want.” He doesn’t even wait for your response, his hands already moving up to your shoulders and beginning to knead them, strong thumbs pressing into the back of your neck. You instantly feel a lot more relief, deciding to go limp in his hold with your arms wrapped around his leg while moving to lay in his lap.

🥊~ “I don’t deserve you Ei.” You say in a sleepy voice, only to be followed by a grunt in response to a flick on your forehead.

🥊~ “Ow! What was that for?”

🥊~ “Shush, don’t even start. We both know that’s a lie. You kicked ass today babe, as you always do. Stop selling yourself short. If anything I don’t deserve you. Now let me take care of you in peace please?” A teasing tone laces his last sentence, causing you to nod and giggle slightly. Luckily he’s probably too worn out to give you a lecture on self worth, he’s always good at making you feel confident.

🥊~ After a while you fall asleep in his lap with a smile on your face, and Kirishima kisses your head a few times before gently laying you back down next to him. He cuddles you in his arms and tucks you in, making sure your body isn’t contorted in any way before nodding off himself.

[purplesurveys]

874

What's something you couldn't live without, other than the obvious? It’d be very hard to have to get by without my glasses. I’d technically survive, but I’ll have to get used to bumping into things a lot and never recognizing anyone unless they’re right beside/in front of me. What's something that will always cheer you up? Dogs. Real life dogs, photos of dogs, videos of dogs, stories about dogs, etc. Who's had the biggest positive impact on your life? My orgmates. They made me happy when I needed it the most, called me out when I needed the help, and idk I’m just happy whenever I get to see them. I can’t recall a time where I felt like it was a chore to spend some time with them. Do you wear flip-flops during the winter? Sigh...moving on... What was the last thing you said out loud? I asked Nina to help me bring Cooper and his stuff up to my parents’ room; specifically, I asked her to bring his food and water bowls.

What's something that irritates you to no end? Backhand compliments. An uncle once congratulated me for getting into my dream school but ended his sentence with “are you sure you don’t wanna go to [2nd top university in the country, (which I also passed the day before)]? You’ll fit better there.” This was like two days after I found out I got into UP, so I was still on cloud nine. I don’t know how my face contorted after that but I wasn’t pleased.

Honestly, do looks matter to you? Yes, but not as much as personality and intelligence. When was the last time you had a girls/guys night out? Not sure. I just have nights out in general; I never plan out gender-exclusive hangouts with my friends. Do you still watch kiddie movies/tv shows? Sometimes, when I get in the mood to. It’s not something I feel the need to do regularly. What's your worst habit? Never learning my lesson and being careless just because everything is going well. Best way I can illustrate this is when a couple of a months ago I started getting regular headaches because I’d sleep at 3, 4 AM – I addressed it by giving myself an earlier bedtime. When the headaches went away and I started feeling better, I went right back to sleeping late lol. Procrastinating is a good example too; I’ve submitted work early occasionally and it’s satisfying as fuck, but I never learn for the most part and stick to doing stuff at the last minute. Do your parents call you by any embarrassing nicknames? No. Byn is a nickname, but I don’t find it embarrassing. Do you have road rage? Yeah but there have to be certain conditions for me to get to that point, like once I’ve seen enough stupidity on the road and I can’t take it anymore; when I’m tense about something; or when traffic has been standstill for too long. Is there a certain word that you always forget how to spell? Not really. I know my spelling pretty well. Are there any books in your room? Which ones? Yesssss but it’s mostly because I owned a lot of books as a kid and I’ve thrown none of them out. My book collection is sorely not updated because I stopped reading as I got older. Do you take too many surveys? I wouldn’t say I take too many, especially considering the fact that I used to take like 7-10 surveys everyday back in high school. I do take them regularly. Write some lyrics from the song you're currently listening to: "You know I’m always coming back to this place, you know I’m always gonna look for your face.”

When it comes to dating, what's your preferred age range? 0-1 year. When was the last time someone gave you a weird look? Continued the next morning, lol. I was dancing in my seat over dinner last night because the fried chicken we had was super good, so my mom looked at me strangely. Do you like to cuddle? Only with a significant other, and an animal if they’re willing to cuddle. Do you like the band Cartel? I don’t think I’ve heard of that band yet. Do you play any instruments? No, but I’m always wishing I could. Do you ever blare the music in the car and dance like an idiot? I used to do that when I drove to and from school. It’s the only time in the day where I’m not working and I’m alone, so I allow myself to let loose. Though I gotta say, most of it is recorded because I always have a dashcam on HAHAHAHA so I definitely have some footage I don’t want getting aired in like my funeral or something. Do you like playing in the rain? When I was a kid.

What's something you miss? Going to the mall is a big one. Anything unpleasant coming up soon? The worst thing I can think of is the first anniversary of Nacho’s passing. It’s not till September, but when I think about how March literally feels like yesterday September doesn’t seem too far away anymore. If you had a pet moose, what would you name him? Probably the name of another animal, like Cow. I’ve seen other people name their dogs the names of different animals and it has always sounded so hilarious to me. Do you often hold back what you really want to say? If it’s gonna make me look unnecessarily blunt and hurtful then yes. Are you currently wearing any jewlery? Nope. What was the last gift you gave to someone? Cooper, for Father’s Day. It was my mom’s idea but I helped chip in with the graduation money I got from one of my aunts. Do you decorate for Christmas? (If you celebrate it, that is.) We do. I’ll probably put a tree and some stockings up once I live alone, idk, just so I don’t feel too lonely. Are you hungry? A bit, but it’s manageable. On that note, I miss continental breakfasts. I’ve been having Filipino-style breakfast for months and I really would just like a goddamn croissant or bread rolls with butter for once, lol. When was the last time you went bowling? Sometime in September and October last year. Can you whistle? Yes. Is there a certain genre of music that you just can't stand? Country. Are you allergic to anything? Nope. How many pillows do you sleep with? Two. I lay my head on one and hug another. If I don’t have a ~hug pillow~ it takes much longer for me to fall asleep. You've just won a free vacation! Where do you want to go? Covid restrictions hypothetically put aside, I’d love to go on the New York/Texas trip I initially planned as my grad gift. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? I have a good relationship with my dad. But it’s not like I feel comfortable enough to tell either of my parents any of my secrets. What's your favorite thing about yourself? Gabie likes to tell me “you’re too selfless, you don’t have to help everyone” in sort of like an annoyed tone because that’s exactly what I do lol - help anyone, even if I have to go out of my way or even if it’ll inconvenience me to do it. But I love it about me. I like when I get to make people go home with one less issue on their shoulders. Do you have any health problems? Scoliosis. Have you ever had a near-death experience? Almost smashed into a car that suddenly braked while I was going 50, 60 kph. Are you extremely picky when it comes to guys/girls? That’s what demis essentially are, lol. Do you ever listen to classical music? It’s my last resort when I’m studying and no other music is helping me get focused. What was the last concert you attended? Paramore. What's a movie you'd like to see right now? (Old or new) Ammonite, it’s an upcoming film with Kate Winslet and Saoirse Ronan. Do you take life too seriously? Most of the time. I just find it necessary that way. When was the last time you were truly scared? This weekend when my mom watched a jumpscare with the sound on, so I heard the loud demon scream that came up in the end. What's the funniest trick you've ever pulled on anyone? I don’t like pulling tricks because I don’t like them pulled on me. The most I’ve done is take Gab’s phone and pretend with her that it’s lost. Do you like orange juice? I’ll drink it if it’s served for free, but I wouldn’t buy one for myself. Do you own any skinny jeans? Yes, nearly all my jeans are skinny. Do you have a diary/journal that you frequently write in? You’re looking at it. When was the last time you had a good workout? November, back when I still had that intense PE class that made me work out for an hour every Wednesday and Friday. Do you like your eye color? I find it too common but I’m not actively complaining about it. I don’t feel the need to change it. When was the last time you played with Play-Doh? Two or three years ago at a cousins’ place. One of them was still a baby then, so the toys they had around were clay and kinetic sand and stuff. What's something that you think people waste too much time on? Fighting on Facebook comments lol Do you think they should outlaw talking on your cell phone while driving? They already have, at least here. Are you embarrassed to burp or fart in front of your friends? For the most part. I’ll burp only in front of Angela and Gab. Do you like peanut butter cookies? Yesssssss, but I don’t get to have it a lot. :(

[she-is-tim]

I love hating you | Elu enemies to lovers AU | Ch. 2

Previous Chapters: 1

Lucas is an angry, closeted and frustrated gay teenager, while Eliott is the handsome, smart and popular guy in school. They hate each other… but not forever.

You are surprising

Lucas woke up with a terrible headache, feeling sick. He walked to the bathroom, taking in a painkiller and brushing his teeth. He could feel the smell of sweat and alcohol on himself. His face looked like a car accident with some horseshit on top of it. He walked back to the couch where he was sleeping, he hoped that Mika has to work today, so he won’t be bothering him. Lisa usually spent the weekends in her room anyways. Manon was still upset because of her breaking up with Charles, so she didn’t really came out of her room during weekends either. 

He laid down, trying to ignore the terrible sound of his “bed”. It wasn’t really uncomfortable and considering that he barely could pay the rent, it was more than he could have asked for. He pulled the blanket over his head. His legs felt numb now, his stomach was tiny, his chest hurt. He knew it was just his anxiety trying to take over, but it still freaked him out. Feeling so empty was just the worst. 

As he was struggling with his apathy, flashes of last night started to hunt his brain. He barely remembered anything after the first joint he smoke with Arthur. He could feel a touch of warm hands on his shoulder, a nice smell coming into his nose, stormy blue eyes appearing in his mind. Lucas pulled up his knees to his chest, still staying under the blanket. He wanted to stop thinking about it, but flashes of Eliott just kept coming. 

His happy smile, the way he looked at Lucas when they were in the bus stop, the feeling of his arms around him. His warm and strong chest, his messy hair and oh, those damn blue eyes. Lucas wanted to scream, rip out his brain and just throw it away. He was feeling everything and nothing at the same time. He hated this.

It was a real struggle going to school on monday, especially since he spend his sunday arguing with Mika. He was telling Lucas how lazy and useless he was around the house, that he was supposed to take care of the dishes on saturday and clean the bathroom, but he didn’t do it. Lucas was far beyond the point where he tried to explain things to his flatmate, because it was pointless. And Mika was also done with Lucas’ bullshit. They both knew that Lucas wasn’t being honest, but since the younger one refused to talk about his problems, Mika couldn’t do anything for him. 

He walked to his locker, taking out the books he needed and putting in the ones he doesn’t need until afternoon. He was so busy with packing, he didn’t notice the person appearing by his side, leaning to the lockers, arms crossed in front of his chest. When he closed the door of his locker, he jumped back, looking like a deer caught in headlight. Eliott smirked at him, eyes sparkling like the summer sky. 

“Morning.” He said on a soft tone, looking excited. Lucas had no idea why he was acting like this and he didn’t even wanted to know. “Are you okay?”

“Someone definitely overdosed you this morning, Demaury.” he said with a suspicious look on his face. 

“I think it was you who got a bit too overdosed on friday.” he said, still with that annoying smile on his face. 

“Thank you for reminding me of that.” he said, rolling his eyes. He was hugging his backpack to his chest, hoping that Eliott will finally leave, so he can breathe a little. 

“You didn’t even let me get you a taxi. But I can see you got home safe.” he said, reaching his hand out to put a stray lock of hair behind Lucas’ ear. The smaller boy jumped a little, taking a step back. Eliott seemed to be amused by that. Fuck you, Demaury.

“Don’t touch me.” he said angrily. 

Eliott was ready to answer when someone walked to them, punching his shoulder gently. It was Alex, smiling brightly, ruffling his friends hair, which made Eliott’s smile to turn into a grumpy expression.

“Morning, Eliott.” he said happily and then looked at Lucas, giving him a fistbump. “Morning, Lulu.” 

“Good morning, Alex.” Lucas said with a soft smile, it always cheered him up how this guy was acting like Lucas was his younger brother. 

“What do you want, dude?” Eliott asked a bit annoyed, Lucas was surprised how his enthusiasm were gone now. He seemed to be annoyingly happy just a couple minutes ago. 

“I am not here because of you.” Alex said and handed Lucas the scarf he left at his place on friday. “Here, I guess this one is yours, Lulu.” He said smiling, ignoring the piercing stare he got from Eliott. Lucas smiled happily, he totally forgot about his scarf, and it was kinda cold today, so he will need it for sure. He grabbed it and stuffed into his bag. 

“Thanks, Alex. I thought I lost it forever.” 

“Next time make sure you don’t leave it behind.” he said softly, ruffling Lucas’ hair. The short one chuckled, he really felt like the younger brother of Alex, it made his day a bit less shitty. 

“I will, thank you.” 

“No worries.” Alex said and walked away with a big smile on his face. Lucas was still smiling, looking back at Eliott, who seemed to be really upset now. He tilted his head, looking into those stormy eyes. He’s so fucking handsome.

“What’s wro...”

“Whatever, I’m going to class.” Eliott said, walking away just as quickly as he appeared. Lucas was watching him a bit shocked and confused. He is just as weird as good looking. 

Days passed and Lucas haven’t see Eliott much, only on their literature class, but he was strangely quiet, barely even said hi to Lucas. The small boy was a bit concerned about his behavior, not admitting to himself that he was actually worried. 

On wednesday he got a message from his mother, a short verse from the bible, including the fires of hell and some other shit like that. Lucas tried to forget about it. He had to text his father to remind him that he needed to pay the rent. His parents were just the worst, even though his mother wasn’t like this on purpose, it felt like he had no one to rely on. 

He was already very frustrated, so after his classes he decided to go to the common room. He had no patience to listen to Mika’s bullshit and he had no chores to do today anyways. He walked in, but the girls weren’t there. He was surprised, but also glad. It was nice to be finally alone, letting go of himself and forgetting the lies he was building each day. 

He looked at the piano in the corner, right in front of that terrible mural. Daphné was planning to repaint it, she had a lot of ideas to redecorate the common room, maybe that’s why they weren’t here. He could remember Emma saying that they wanted to get some stuff for Daphné’s plans this week. 

His steps were unsure a bit, but then he decided to fuck it and walked to the piano, sitting down on the little bench in front of it. He opened the key lid, looking at the black and white keyboard. He haven’t played in a long time now, since they didn’t have a piano at the flat, but he loved to learn playing the piano, making his mom smile with some silly or happy music. 

He was searching for melodies in his head, he remembered a complicated piece from a couple years ago. He was supposed to go to a competition with it, but his mom snapped just a day before, so he had to take care of her. He put his fingers on the keys, they were cold, but made him feel warm in his chest. A bit of nostalgia crawled its way up inside him and this time he let it to take over. He took a deep breath and started to play. 

His mind got lost into the song, he closed his eyes and enjoyed the freedom he felt spreading in his chest. He forgot about his pain, his worries, his lies, he was just living with the music his fingers created on the instrument. It was really magical and he felt sad when the song ended. He wished it could go on forever, to just sit here and keep playing the piano until the end of the world. 

He stopped playing, opening his eyes when he heard slow clapping, he jumped, turning around quickly to see Eliott Demaury himself standing in the door of the common room. He was standing there a while now, cause his bag was in front of his legs, not on his back. He was wearing dark jeans that were ripped at the knee parts, a black shirt and his usual hoodie jacket combo. But the thing that catched Lucas’ attention was his stunning smile and those piercing eyes. They were filled with so much emotion, focusing on Lucas like he was the only person on the whole world. 

“That was awesome.” Eliott said after a minute of clapping. 

Lucas didn’t know what to say, just watched as Eliott grabbed the straps of his bag, walking inside and closing the door behind him. He felt his heart beating faster as the boy got closer and closer. Finally he was standing in front of Lucas, looking down at him, still with that weird expression on his face. He couldn’t decide what he saw in those eyes, they looked like the sea on a really windy day, filled with waves of emotions. 

“You are surprising.” he said, looking into Lucas’ eyes.

“I wasn’t expecting anyone to hear it.” He mumbled, finally able to find his voice, but that was basically all he could push out. He was just in total panic thanks to the tall boy, stading so close to him. His neck was hurting because of looking up at him, but he didn’t wanted to break eyecontact.

“Didn’t know you can play piano. I wonder if there’s anything else you keep in secret.” he said with a soft, teasing smile.

“Not like you don’t know it already.” Lucas said, pointing out how Eliott knows about his sexuality.

“That was more of a guess. And you made my suspicions turn out to be right with how you reacted to me.” he said smiling. Lucas could punch him in the face. How dare he be so stunningly sweet? That was illegal. 

“I hate you so much.” Lucas mumbled, blaming his own stupidity for letting Eliott indirectly know that he is gay. The tall boy chuckled, running his fingers through his own hair, looking at Lucas happily.

“I know that.” he said smiling. 

“Why are you here?” Lucas couldn’t find a better question to ask, his brain was fucking him up so bad. Eliott’s smell was crawling into his nose, the flashes from friday night started to haunt him again. He remembered Eliott’s arms around his body, holding him so carefully, but still strongly. He remembered the warmth of his body and his breath on his neck. He got goosebumps just thinking about it. 

“I was on my way going home, then I heard the music. When I saw you sitting here, playing the piano... I just couldn’t leave.” he explained. 

Lucas felt his heart skipping a beat, he couldn’t tell why, but it made him happy that Eliott wanted to stay and listen to his music. They were staring at each other for long minutes, he had no idea who took the first move, but their face was so close now that he felt Eliott’s breath on his lips. He closed his eyes, lips opening a little. He was just following the moment, not thinking about what he was about to do. Their lips almost touched, when they heard a loud banging. 

Eliott pulled back, putting his bag on his shoulder, looking really lost and avoiding to look into the other boy’s eyes. The girls walked into the common room, bringing lots of special stuff with them, chatting and laughing loudly. They were already inside when they noticed the boys. Lucas quickly closed the lid of the piano. Manon and Emma were too busy talking, but Daphné smiled at them softly. 

“Hey, I wasn’t expecting of you guys to be here.” she said softly. “We got some supplies to redecorate the common room.” 

“That’s amazing, Daphy.” Lucas said softly, trying to forget about that moment with Eliott, which was hard considering that said boy was standing just a few meters away from him. 

“I was just... I heard you wanna repaint that shit.” Eliott said, pointing at the mural. “If you need help with it, I can try to make something better to cover it.” he offered with a little smile now. He looked at Lucas, who was staring at him in awe. Eliott repainting the mural? How can he be so fucking perfect? 

“Oh really?” Daphné asked with that bright smile of her. “That is so generous of you! I would love that.” she said excitedly. “I was actually worried, since I didn’t wanted to just repaint it to a certain color, but none of us is really the artistic type, y’know.” she said looking at the girls. They were packing stuff out of bags and boxes, discussing where to put all those, how to start the decoration. 

“I’ll let you know when I have free time to do it.” Eliott said. “I gotta go now. See you.” he said, but when he said the last two words, he was looking at Lucas only, which made the boy gasp. Then Eliott disappeared behind the door and he stayed there with the girls. He joined them in the packing, trying to get into the conversation, so he wouldn’t be thinking about that he almost kissed Eliott fucking Demaury. 

It was really late, Lucas was staring at his phone, more specifically a picture of Eliott on instagram. It was just a simple selfie, he looked into the camera, his hair was messy, he had dark circles around his eyes like always. He wasn’t smiling, well not the way he smiled at Lucas. It was just a half-smirk playing on his lips. The caption said: “Missing you”.

He posted it like 6 hours ago, not much after he left the common room. People in the comments were freaking out, mostly girls. They were guessing who the caption could be about, asking questions, but Eliott didn’t reply to any of those. Lucas didn’t know what to think about all this. He had a weird feeling that the caption was about him, but he didn’t wanted to think about that. He can’t have feelings for Eliott, not a good idea. What if I already feel something? 

Lucas showed his phone under his pillow, closing his eyes, but all he could see was Eliott’s face. His eyes while he was clapping, smiling at Lucas. His face before they leant close to each other. The smell of Eliott kept haunting him, it was infuriating. 

He spent long hours, suffering from his own thoughts. This caused him to sleep only 3 or 4 hours. He drank two mugs of black coffee in the morning before going to school. It wasn’t the best idea, but he had to stay awake and function in school somehow. 

Literature was his third class, but Lucas still looked like a walking dog poop. His eyelids tried to close every fifth minute, his limbs felt heavy, he sat down to his place, totally not noticing that Eliott is there. His mind could only process one thing at a time, and that was him trying not to fall asleep. 

He jumped a little when a warm hand touched his shoulder, looking to his left and seeing Eliott made his face feel suddenly really hot. First he thought it was embarrassment, but then he felt dizzy, not understanding what Eliott was saying to him. His eyes closed, his body was falling, ending up in strong arms. They everything ceased to exist and Lucas enjoyed the nothing surrounding him.

Quiet noises made him open his eyes, he wasn’t sure where he was, but he laid in a bed, having a blanket on him, but still wearing his indoor outfit, so he was definitely not home. His eyelids felt heavy, his head was spinning, but he slowly opened his eyes. The first thing he saw was a pair of blue eyes. His heart was fluttering of the thought that Eliott was there with him.

“Hey, how are you?” he asked softly, he looked relieved now that Lucas was conscious again. 

“I feel dizzy.” he said honestly, struggling to put his body into sitting position. He could see that Eliott wasn’t happy that he moved so much, but didn’t do anything to stop him. “What happened?” 

“You fainted in class.” he said simply. His eyes were dark, filled with worry which made Lucas smile a little. 

“Yeah, that makes sense.” he mumbled and laid back on the soft pillows. It felt good to finally get some rest in a real bed and not on a goddamn couch. “Sorry that you had to take care of me.” he said now, hugging the blanket on his body, looking at every little expression the other one makes. 

“Yeah, I had to carry you here, it wasn’t easy.” he said with a soft smile. “You owe me a lot, Lallemant.” the way he said Lucas’ name gave him goosebumps.

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah, you can make it up with...”

“Lulu!” Arthur, Yann and Basile stormed into the nursing room loudly, running to the bed, surrounding Lucas, asking questions, talking to fast for him to understand.

“Hey! Hey! Guys, I am fine, but calm down! I can’t understand shit.” he said, raising his hand to stop his friends talking. From the corner of his eyes he saw Eliott leaving, using that the boys were focused on Lucas. Of course he didn’t wanted to stay. Why would he wanna stay with such a loser as you, Lucas? 

He told his friends what happened, trying to avoid mentioning Eliott. Luckily they were focused on the fact that Lucas fainted and asked if he was sick. He told them that he has some trouble sleeping, but other than that he was fine. Well, they were asking about his physical health, so he actually wasn’t lying to them this time. 

He spent the rest of the day in the nursing room, resting and thinking about Eliott. He went home around 16:20, the school doctor made sure he got food, enough water and anything else. She was really nice to Lucas, which was a fresh thing after all the things he had to endure at the flat and from his parents. 

He was laying on the couch, the others were either not home or working, he had no idea, but he enjoyed the silence. He looked at his phone and noticed that he got a message, it was a DM on instagram, from Eliott himself. He swallowed before he opened the app to see the message.

srodulv You still owe me Did you get home safe? 

Lucas smirked like an idiot, seeing those messages and just enjoying the fact that this asshole at least a little bit cared for him. It was such a good feeling, his heart was beating faster, his palms were sweaty. He had to wipe them before typing a reply to Eliott.

lucallemant I’ll make it up to you, don’t worry I’m home now, laying on the couch

srodulv You should be in bed, not on the couch

lucallemant The couch is my bed

He wasn’t really thinking before sending that message. That was just so pathetic and lame. He ruined the mood totally and after long minutes without any sign from Eliott, he knew that it was a stupid idea telling the truth. 

srodulv You don’t have a bed?

lucallemant there’s only three room in the flat and we’re four I am the one who got the couch

srodulv Isn’t that a little unfair? 

lucallemant It sucks, but I barely can pay the rent, so it’s more than what I deserve

srodulv You deserve so much more

lucallemant Are you sure this is Eliott Demaury? I’m starting to think someone hacked your insta 

srodulv Very funny Go to sleep, Lallemant

lucallemant Sure, see you

srodulv See you 

Lucas put down his phone next to his pillow, but then picked it up again, reading their conversation over and over. He just couldn’t believe his eyes, but it was true. And maybe... just maybe he was right about that insta post. His heart started racing again, making it impossible for him to fall asleep, so instead he just went to Eliott’s profile, liking that last post. He closed his eyes, putting his phone down now. He haven’t feel so happy in a long time now.

Writers note: We’ll this got together fast, thanks to an idea of my best mec. I hope you guys liked it. I appreciate all the messages and asks I recieved! Feel free to do so after this chapter, I wanna hear your opinion about it. What do you like in it, what you don’t like? It would help me a lot! Bisou

[wordsablaze]

Chapter Eleven: Knock

All Because Of A Car Cinder's life revolved around the garage, working as a mechanic, until that one male student came in looking for a Mercedes and changed her life... AU AH Kaider story.

There's something extremely irritating about an alarm clock.

As much as you want to hate the device and smash it to pieces, a small part of you knows that you can't blame the machine because you're the one that told it to annoy you in the first place.

And that paradox of hatred is exactly why Cinder glares at the wall for an entire two and a half minutes before she sighs and swings her legs over the edge of the bed, reluctantly attempting to wake herself up as quickly as possible.

Of course, she spares a minute for holding her grudge against Garan for leaving with no warning and making her miss her date in the first place, but no more than a minute because something tells her there must have been a reason, there had to have been a reason, there's no way there wasn't a perfectly reasonable explanation.

She's awake and alert by the time she's showered and twisted her hair into a ponytail, not bothering to change outfit because it's comfortable and there's no point in wearing a new outfit only for it to get covered in paint or dust or whatever else Adri's chores entail.

But first, food.

Thankfully, she's had enough practice at being quick to assemble a breakfast before Adri and Pearl come downstairs and demand one. Peony never seems to mind but Cinder knows Adri will complain on behalf of her for the sake of making them both feel guilty.

She's also quickly eaten her own breakfast – a breakfast bar, an apple, and all that's left over from the cinnamon roll Kai had sent her, which admittedly isn't very much at all.

"Oh, well, would you look at that. You've finally managed to do something right," Adri says, the statement acting as a rather strange compliment.

Cinder just shrugs, stifling a laugh when Peony pulls a face from behind her sister and subtly finishes swallowing the cinnamon roll in her mouth.

"Spider!" Pearl yells, jumping up onto the table.

Cinder can't stop her eyes from rolling in exasperation. Why do people assume that yelling and stepping onto furniture will solve their problems? It's not like spiders can't climb at all, they have eight legs and webs at their disposal, for stars' sake.

Nevertheless, she carefully picks the spider up in a tissue and chucks it outside, pretending to be totally okay with a shrieking girl so early in the morning.

"Thanks, Cinder!" Peony chirps happily, a grateful smile blessing her expression.

Adri coughs as if she's had enough of being nice for one day even though she wasn't the one being nice, and loudly chews her piece of toast.

"I thought you said bread in the morning was unhealthy?" Pearl asks.

"For a growing girl like you, it is."

"Common sense, Pearl!" Peony adds, giggling.

Cinder can't help being amused herself but makes sure her laughter is silent as she waits for the three of them to finish eating.

When they do, she washes up as Adri sticks a 'new and improved' list of chores on the fridge door and practically orders the girls to get ready for their dance classes – one thing Cinder's glad she's not allowed to do because the very thought of having to pointlessly move her limbs in such a ridiculous pattern makes her shudder and she can't imagine actually having to do such a thing, especially when there are costumes involved.

"Make sure these are done by the time we get back."

"When are you getting back?" Cinder asks.

"Half seven."

"Half seven?" Cinder echoes, glancing at the clock, which reads 9 am.

Adri just sighs and points to the list before walking out. Peony pokes her head back into the room as soon as her mother has gone and whispers. "We have rehearsals, our classes, a different show each, and then the after-party, which ends up in us going to another party at someone's house."

"Oh… Thanks." Cinder frowns to herself, wondering how someone can tolerate such hassle once every season.

"I'm just hoping he's there…" Peony admits dreamily.

"Who?" Cinder asks.

"I don't know his name, but we all know he's the sweetest, dreamiest dancer ever."

"You have a crush?" Cinder asks, smiling.

"No!" A pause. "Maybe…"

Cinder laughs. "Don't worry, I won't tell if you don't tell."

Peony giggles to herself, then nods solemnly. "Deal."

The two of them salute each other before Cinder rolls her sleeves up and Peony skips up the stairs to get changed for her day of dance-related activities.

"Wash the freezer?" Cinder asks the list as if the paper could somehow be sentient, and goes to inspect said machine, groaning when she sees the layers of ice and what looks like paint at the bottom, "Why would you put paint in a freezer?"

She's just about aware of the others leaving but she pays no attention to it, more focused on trying not to get freezer ice all over her skin. She hears Peony whisper a faint 'good luck' before the door locks and she allows herself to groan, but not for long.

After all, she doesn't want to be stuck in this miserable place for any longer than the weekend and she needs to figure out where Adri's hidden her computer so she knows where to look in the future when such a situation occurs again – something that's sadly very possible.

Cinder finds herself humming, not to the tune of a song or a rhyme or anything like that, but to the sound of what she imagines would make a good testament to her annoyance.

Surprisingly, the freezer takes next to no time, and she's done with it before her hands get too cold to be warmed up by a little bit of hot tap water. It's a good thing Adri had forgotten to turn the boiler off like she does every day, something that annoys Cinder to no end but it's the one thing she can tolerate because she knows old habits die hard.

More than half the list is finished by the time she takes a break for lunch, which logically leaves her with plenty of time to search for her confiscated laptop. Only because she doesn't want to waste time walking to a café for coffee, she makes one with the old, barely used machine they have lying around and makes herself a couple of sandwiches with the pieces of bread that Adri dislikes and doesn't care about her eating.

She's about to start finishing the second half of the list when there's a knock at the door.

Cinder ignores it, figuring that it's a neighbour or something; pretentious neighbours are the last people she wants to deal with – aside from Adri and Pearl, of course. The person knocks twice more, apparently determined to be answered, before there's silence once again.

Shaking her head with a mixture of amusement and exasperation, Cinder starts heading up the stairs, aiming to find the stuff needed from the attic before taking another break to find her laptop.

Her plan works for a bit and she's already started humming the tune to a song that's yet to exist when there's another knock.

This time, it's at the window.

like/reblog but don’t repost, thanks!

[andrieh-vitimus]

Day 5: Enchantment +: The Thieves of Time...  Just say fuck it with me

Today was a fuck it kinda of day, but I made sure to do my Gigong before I said fuck it. I had a rough night sleeping after doing a rough divination with a client that just tapped my shit hard.  When your running a low calorie diet, and using analysis it freaking happens.  So today, I worked from home, and unfortunately... yep got little done on programming work.  It’s not for trying right.  Just cognitively, I was not in the game.  Now, there’s this cascade of events that happens, when you start thinking about it.  Those of you who work or even have a business kinda know this cascade.  Shit, this would happen alot more when I was actively doing magic to break ( let’s be honest, its physical manifestation or bust) reality.  Read on to see all that.

Shit now behind at work cause I was mentally fuckered for some reason and didn’t get much done ( outside of management, and even then.. eh).

Shit,  I was already behind on things I promised people for my author publicity stuff, I really wanted to get shit done.  I have a book on Sante Muerte, I really want to write  a blurb, blogs, other shit, but shit gets complicated over the weekend ( which we covered).

Shit, 5 hours into fixing Deeper down, shits still not working .

Shit I had plans for the week on the social side of things, and that would create problems if I cancel things.

Shit, now I have extra pressure and stress to get shit done the whole week at work, because well I was fuckered for a day.

Shit now all those social obligations and publicity obligations really hurt, cause theres work stress.

Hahaha... House chores don’t do themselves motherfucker.

Shit theres no coffee in the house to feed the spirits, do I go out.

Shit I am too fucking tired to even drive.

Come to the weekend, try to catch up on everything and start off the next week behind.. repeat suckle.

I know this cycle with many people.

So at 11 after getting to the Chiropractor, I did the Gigong first.  I got to about 6 pm or so, meditated my worries away, thought about shit,  and I went to sleep, cause I was not feeling optimal.  I should be able to do that.  I got up at 10, to write this.  Focusing purely on mental energy health, this was the right decision.

Now, there some people reading this will say.  No shit man, this is pointless self-analysis.  That’s what you should do, nor do I think it was right.  There is no right answer and I think its not at all simple.  I think many people are faced with decisions all the time, that are even harsher.  It was not to long ago that I was asking the questions of, do I hustle and pay rent or get sick?  But its all just a temporary lot of shit... spirituality of many faiths say, this is bullshit pursuits.  I am not so sure right, worldly achievements are valuable if they have meaning.

But theres alot of costs to what I did.  I didn’t get the Blurb done for Santa Muerta book meaning I probably will not be asked again ( I did tell the person I was coming off being sick, but that matters not).  It does actually look like a fucking good book.  That’s a publicity hit, and I keep having those.  Less attention = less money.    Keeping deeper down running, and more so not getting the bookings for the show done = another hit.  Let’s not even start about me taking care of the family, and not getting any publicity done for a while.  Even then, I know I did the right things, but lets ask?  

Do you think the public as an egregore cares why I am not feeding the spectacle? A person gives a fuck, the pubic does not. Of course not, and to paraphrase Mr. Wednesday, its hard when you know you’re being forgotten.  Facebook quantifies even that attention focus for us to make it even more toxic and even more destructive.  Now we are cursed with mortality AND the fact that people will create any image they want for you.  Now, like you I have family things to do, and other things.   Really, the continual stealing of time is exactly that, but its more then that, its energy.

“The world is a Vampire set to drain”... yep ... that’s so emo shit, but in this case the song fits.

Remember, now words and writing can be meditation, if you do not censor yourself. The writing is clarifying my thoughts, the stream of consciousness shakes down ideas.  Spending the time on Tumblr to write this is a type of meditation, to think about the patterns is meditation.  Even the hour to write this on Tumblr is done in a context of “others”, but not so much.  That affects the meditation and the analysis. When you start marshaling personal energy in units, or deep diving into self-analysis and doing the Qigong, in the way I am, you start becoming very aware of minutia patterns.  Where the drains are happening, how the drains are happening, and those issues.   Now, you can get all TCM about this and start applying this to specific Gigong excercises, but I am still rolling on that C-7 point, trying to prevent overworking myself and embracing some “dont give a fucks”.

Once you get on that spiral of expectations, it starts to hit you like a freight train. I am not whining about this all.  How about a nice cup of fuck off, if you think that, but I am analyzing it.   Before, I would tend to be more of a helping sort of magician, often in the circles I was running with that might even mean pretty serious “fuck off death” magic aka real shit, with little or no repayment from he people receiving that sort of boon.  Where does that get you?  No where in the modern world, and I have never had strong self-reward systems for being altruistic.  Really, that self-reward, we know thats why people do “selfless shit”, right ( some people would call this self-reward system, “being a good person”, or “faith”).

I like achievement in the world.  The World is the game.  I got to be honest.

Sometimes, it even the best of us, have to take a step back.  Yeah, many people selling shit will shift back the blame of the achievement gap back on you and say, you do not want it enough.  That sells because we are all addicted to self fucking punishment that comes from a sick and diseased society that tells us work harder, and get more achievement.  But it doesn’t hold up, and really the expectation train sucks us down and myth of hard work = success is vampiric of the highest order.

So this all goes back to the image started with,  a thief.  We need to be thieves for ourselves.  Yes, I know, some of you might not like that metaphor cause “thieving is bad”, but think about it.   

We all have expectations on us and around us.  Some of these we can blow off, at a cost. Can we afford the cost, sometimes. Sometimes the cost is too hight to actually blow off.   I mean it is hardly a choice to blow off your job, and not have a roof over your head.  It is a choice, but its not really a reasonable one. 

The hype and callousness of a whole industry will tell you so, but say no to that shit.  Instead, steal the time to make little changes. Most people cannot just transition to a different “career”, or follow the insane advise to do what you want and the positive thinking cult ( when there are real responsibilities that really are not easily discharged), but we can change our mindsets around that. Even simple things like television and now the internet are purposefully addictive.   Thieves of our time and energy.   In a world of thieves, learn to be a better thief and steal it back, with conscious deliberate intent.  One piece at a time.  Theirs a whole lot of “anti-nominal” engagement with the thief archetype, and that is purposefully why I am engaging it like this.  A thief is outside of “society”, and thus purposeful deviates from the expectation train.  See what I did there?  Just think on that for a moment.

Detach from the emotions of the expectations.  You will let people down, and thats their problem.   Realize it is what it is, steal the time from the other sources and then use that coveted jewel for expressly meaningful to you shit. We can steal that time back, because from the perspective of others, they believe they own it.   If you want take a self perspective, you could say you revolting and taking the time back.  I prefer to “thief” metaphor because it lets you build up on small tasks to get to that personal “revolt”.  I am working on that revolt components too, but this is antinomial.  People expect shit from you, when you do not comply they will punish you via social means.  Some part of you has to embrace that anti-nomial, outside of society attitude, lest society tear you apart.

Say it with me, “I am out of fucks to give”.. It helps.  Steal that time.  Detach the emotions, and covet your own jewels.

15-20 minute a day for Gigong, not alot, but lots of benefits.  Thats stealing the time back.   Its the same with the Calories on my health plan, they are measured and weighed.  If you are starting to quantify time and energy, like a thief... well then you can start seeing where the waste is going.  Aka engaging like a thief, a particularly antinomial and anti-social archetype in a capitalist society, allows you to start weighing the impact and reward of the choices versus the time commitment.

Besides, saying it like this is way more fun then telling you to be “Mindful” right?

Want to see a different type of Thief, well how about Pirate? A little more romatic now isn’t it :)  What’s a post with out Captain Jack.