#i almost got a blood transfusion out of that but thanks to my mom's idea of making me get chuffed with iron foods i didn't

[alinedreams]

I'd love to tell the story of how I survived almost 4 months of constant menstrual bleeding (due to a medical error) AND I recorded a VCV UTAU voicebank in that meantime, but truth be told, I barely did and I'm still facing several consequences to this day.

But I'll tell y'all one thing: now I can barely eat iron-rich foods because I got FREAKING TIRED of their taste.

But yeah, every time someone proposes a nearly unsurvivable scenario, I'm like "I'll survive but I'll be in unbearable pain the whole time because God hates me" because it's exactly what happened

[crusty-chronicles]

Airheaded S/O Headcannons #12: Uryu (Bleach)

You honestly irritate and drain him at first

That being said, he is probably one of the most capable people when it comes dealing with your bullshit.

Remember Orihime during the soul society arc?

Yeah, he's got the patience of a god

Perfectly equipped for handling your chaos, albeit begrudgingly

"Whaddya mean I can't fight that guy?" You complained.

"You dimwit, he's at least double your size with double the spiritual pressure!!!" Uryu retorted while gesturing to a particularly large arrancar.

"Booo, you're no fun. I like Ichigo better."

His pride won't allow a blow like that, so he tries to show off to prove that Ichigo is in fact not better.

When the enemy is finally defeated, he's met with you clapping and cheering like one of those soccer moms.

Admittedly, it does get him a little flustered. But it's a major ego booster, especially from you.

The first time he met you he had no idea you were completely brain dead

It was during his first showdown with Ichigo.

The hollows wouldn't stop coming, and what's worse, a Menos was starting to crossover from Heuco Mundo.

It was just too much and too overwhelming at the same time.

And then a spike of spiritual pressure came from next to him and Ichigo.

The surrounding hollows being defeated before you made your presence known.

Giving a look between the soul reaper and the Quincy before scowling.

"This isn't a dick swinging contest! Actual people could be hurt, so get your shit together and get rid of that thing!" You lectured before shooting a little ray of reishi towards another group of hollows, decimating them completely.

It felt like you were almost as strong as a Lieutenant from the Soul Society.

Which was admittedly shocking, but gave them enough time to knock the Menos back from where it came from.

"Thank you, for holding the other hallows off." Uryu figured it was the least he could do after you stalled for so long.

"Huh? Oof-!"

You just tripped.

Over nothing.

And then shot right back up.

"OH NO I LEFT THE SHOP UNATTENDED!!! TESAI'S GONNA KILL ME!!!"

You were odd. But that could've been a coincidence, right???

It was not a coincidence and now he's wondering how you manage not to get yourself killed everyday.

"Do NOT slice the box cutter towards yourself!"

And then he shows you how to do it properly so you don't stab yourself.

Will always complain about you ripping your clothes during a fight, and then proceed to stitch up all the holes.

"Wait, I can have little dandelions on that part of my sleeve?"

"Shut up, you should be glad I'm fixing it for you at all."

Makes sure he has the right thread to embroider them on 💀💀💀

You're bleeding profusely?

"Why don't you want Orihime to heal you? She's a pro at this." Uryu complains as he's cleaning up your wounds.

"Because I like you better. And you're good with stitching."

He's extremely embarrassed but appreciates the compliment.

Also, he probably has to take you to the hospital because you definitely need a blood transfusion.

You 🤝Pesche = Uryu's sleep paralysis demons

The two of you together make him want to pull his hair out.

One makes his life hell on purpose and the other (you) on accident.

But you get a pass. You're actually useful in combat.

Kisuke's adopted child™ so you're extra strong 💪💪💪

Doesn't realize he likes you until the bounts show up and he gets abducted by Yoshino.

You kept up with her surprisingly well, despite being injured by Udagawa.

Giving a relentless pursuit to get him back

But you could only push yourself so much with the gash on your side that eventually, Yoshino's doll managed to land a direct hit on you.

The next time Uryu sees you is when he wakes up in his father's hospital.

Everyone bursting in to come and see if he was okay.

Then there was you who made your way in on crutches with Kisuke supporting you.

And before he could ask if you were okay, you practically collapsed on top of him.

Giving him a bone crushing hug before finally speaking.

"I'm just so happy you're okay."

And it was the way you said it that had him smitten.

Like you really were worried about him.

Like he was actually important despite not having his powers anymore.

Yeah okay, maybe he didn't have anything to prove.

At least not to you.

Another one of the unfortunate few who tries to court you normally.

Except it's way more awkward.

This man has absolutely no idea how to approach you now that he has these feelings for you.

"I got you flowers."

"Oh... I'm allergic, but they're still pretty though 😃"

A little embarrassed but not deterred because it wasn't a 'no.'

Tries to make you food.

Key word: tries because he forgot about the fact that you and Orihime always share

Uryu, you fool! How could you be so blind?!?

☝️his actual thoughts as his attempts to court you keep failing.

But his last and final attempt finally works.

He was once again trying to show off to you while fighting a hollow.

He was doing fine up until he fell flat on his ass dodging an attack.

You'd been so quick to divert the enemy's oncoming attack before helping him up.

"Hey I got you, okay?"

And he just blurts it out.

"I'm in love with you."

And your bright smile makes him relax.

"I know... Ichigo told me."

"HE WHAT!?!?"

100% babies you.

You keep forgetting to pack your lunch?

Don't worry it's already on the counter with a little sticky note inside.

You scrapped yourself on who knows what?

You're in good hands, he's been around a hospital enough of his life to know what he's doing.

He'll even give you a kiss over the bandaid if you want to 👉👈

Speaking of hospitals 👀👀👀

Ryuken absolutely hates you

Like with a fiery passion

"Really? Them?" He gestures angrily over at you.

And it's you making silly faces at a nervous kid going in for surgery to make them laugh.

Uryu's so smitten. 😊😊😊

"Yeah. That's the one."

Does get a little insecure but not exactly jealous

He doesn't understand what you see in him.

He's not exactly the strongest or the most good looking.

The only thing he's confident in is his mind

And even then it has the tendency to fail him.

But you don't seem to see that

For whatever reason, you like him

Flaws and all, you chose him.

Will only call you sweet nicknames in private.

Among them are: love, sweetheart, baby, dear, hun, and his personal favorite - sunshine.

Prefers to fight for you than have you join in and get hurt.

Even if he's more at risk of being injured than you are

His Quincy pride just won't allow it.

NEXT UP: Gaara (Naruto)

MASTERLIST

An: A long boi because I'm currently watching bleach right now. Honesty all the men in bleach are so fine and I'm probably gonna add grimmjow for my bonus headcannons

[topazy]

The Fierce And Broken

1.02

Masters

Knowing that you are all in danger while looking for the kid named Jasper, everyone splits off into pairs. Luckily, you are with Murphy. It was an unspoken understanding that you would have each other’s backs no matter what. Bellamy, on the other hand? You weren’t so sure.

Murphy put his arm around you while smirking. "So...things got a little heated before."

Frowning, you shoved his arm off your shoulder. While heading to the area where Jasper got speared, Bellamy had made it clear he wanted yours and Clarke’s wristbands. Both you and the blonde told him to go to hell. Clarke had since teamed up with Finn, leaving Wells with a less than impressed Bellamy.

"How long do you think it will be before Clarke and Finn get it on?" You asked, changing the subject. "The sexual tension between them is almost unbearable to stand."

"He’s not the only one drooling after the princess."

You and Murphy both turned to look at Bellamy and Wells, walking a short distance behind you. It was true, Wells liked Clarke as well, but you also had a feeling Bellamy was interested in her.

"Hey guys, I think we’ve found something!" Finn yelled.

You watched as Bellamy and Wells rushed over to him, and Clarke. You and Murphy walked at a more normal pace. "Is it wise to be shouting, alerting anything near to our presence?" You mumbled. Murphy snorted at your comment.

—

"What’s going on?" You asked once, reaching the others.

"A trail of blood. The people who speared him moved him." Clarke explained.

A growling sound came from the nearby bushes. Clarke turned to Bellamy, "Now would be a good time to take out that gun."

"Did any of you hear that?" You asked in a low voice. The small group shook their heads. "It sounded like a cry for pain."

Hearing it again, you took off running. Throw your previous idea of trying to blend in to the scenery away. Jasper. "He’s over here."

"Y/N, just wait for us!" Clarke called back.

Ignoring her, you walked forward when the ground beneath you gave way. You grabbed onto the vines and grass for dear life. You screamed, looking down at the spikes below. Relief washed over you when you felt someone grabbing onto your wrist.

Bellamy. He was staring at you blankly as you squirmed like a worm on a hook. He was going to let you die. Suddenly, Finn lunged forward and took hold of your other wrist, pulling you up. Clarke, Wells, and Murphy quickly arrived and helped him.

You landed on the ground with a thud. Panting, you turned over to your side and sent Bellamy a death glare, before turning to face Finn. "Thanks, spacewalker."

Clarke kneeled down beside you. "What happened? Are you hurt?"

You nodded and gave her a weak smile. "I’m fine Clarke, no, thanks to some people."

Bellamy snapped, "I helped pull you up."

"Whatever." You stood up and brushed the dirt and grass off your clothes. "I’m going to help Finn, and Murphy get Jasper down."

You could hear the growling getting closer, quickly followed by gunshots. You spun to see Wells holding the gun. Good for him. You didn’t think Jaha junior had it in him.

"Let’s get Jasper back. Finn, can you help me make a stretcher?"

—

The moonlight shining through the trees was the only light you had to use to find the right way back to camp.

You, Finn, Wells and Clarke carried the stretcher that was supporting an injured Jasper, while Bellamy and Murphy carried the large dead cat. You knew little about animals, but you guessed that it was a very deadly animal.

—

Inside the drop-ship, Clarke made quick work inspecting Jasper's wound, while you had another look at Octavia’s leg.

"What happened to you?" She asked, pointing towards the bruise that was developing on your elbow.

"Oh, it’s nothing. I tripped over a vine and stumbled forward and hit it against a rock. It’s stupid really." You explained. Lying wasn’t in your nature, but you didn’t see the point in telling Octavia the truth that you almost walked into a death trap set up by grounders. It would only cause a panic within the camp.

The dark-haired girl let out a slight wince in pain. Her cut was showing signs of an infection. You weren’t sure what to do about it. Without antibiotics, it would only get worse. Hopefully, Clarke will know.

"Just keep it rested." You said it with a reassuring smile.

Octavia hopped off the table. "How did you learn so much about medical stuff?"

"My mom was a nurse on the ark." You explained, "she taught me a few things before...before she got floated."

Octavia tilted her head to the side. "What did she do?"

"Tried to save somebody’s." You scoffed, shaking your head. The memory of what happened still made you mad. "It was a traumatic birth. The woman had lost a lot of blood, and my mom fought to save her and the baby. She broke the law by going over the limit on how much blood they were allowed to use during a transfusion."

The younger Blake gave you a look of sympathy. "At least your mom died a hero. Mine got killed because of me."

"That’s not true, your mom risked her life because she loved you. I bet you and Bellamy were her entire world."

You and Octavia shared a heartfelt smile before going your separate ways. You liked her. It was just a shame you hated her brother so much, otherwise you probably could have been good friends with her.

[djsherriff]

Here’s redesigns of the other 3 new warriors , more in depth comments under cut 

B-negative is now Blood Saint!

When he was born ,instead of being a bundle of life ready to take on the world, he suffered from extreme blood due to complications from the labour, meaning he had to have a blood transfusion.

Though unaware at the time, doctors actually used the blood of a vampire to save his life, causing him to become a living vampire of sorts. (So yes he can still age)

It’s his life long mission to learn who his mysterious blood donor is and master his dark powers, but it would be much easier his parent stopped bugging him about him wearing 4 layers of leather in the summer and his loud music. “augh , my parents are the REAL blood suckers around here”

You’re probably curious why he would go by “blood saint” , well besides sounding cool, it’s also a bit of irony for him.

See , unlike other vampires Saint can actually heal people when he bites them rather than turn them, which also works cause he actually can’t stand the taste of human blood (no matter how much he loves to push the brooding vampire aesthetic), he eats foods like any other kid his age, though his diet consists of more meat than the average teenager.

Besides that , he has the standard vampire traits like turning into a bat, weak in sunlight , can’t stand garlic , you know like the classics!

Artist comment:

Since Marvel has a bunch of other vampires they rarely use, I rewrote his backstory a bit so he wasn’t tied to a well known superhero , as well as have a chance to have more original vampire characters in the marvel universe.

The only thing I really pushed design wise was tone down the red/pink and use it more sparingly throughout to make it pop more (hence his hair colour being changed), as well as add a few more punk aesthetics to it such as spikes.

I imagined that his your standard punk teen who trying way too hard to rebel against everyone and everything besides what he personally likes, you know the “its not a PHASE mom” kinda teenager. I thought it be hilarious if besides the vampire thing he has going , his got the most normal home life outta everyone on the team and thus the most “boring”. Yes he totally makes up ridiculously tragic backstories for himself when meeting strangers , his a complete drama queen and is definitely a theatre kid.

Speaking of hilarious, I also made him the team’s medic with his healing bite, cause I also thought that was funny and also a great opportunity for both good comedy and some good character development for him.

His greatest character flaw is his tendency to overdramatise EVERYTHING and he needs to learn that sometimes , life is that simple and that’s not a bad thing.

Trailblazer is now Void Caster

Void Caster is a young teeenager from a family who regularly travels through the universe to explore the wonders and to gain a living , though her mother decided she needed to stop having her head up in the stars so much and return to Earth- literally.

She comes from a long line of space witches : witches ...... but in space! The deeper history is that her ancestors were witches who came into contact with aliens and decided to use their magic to explore beyond the world of earth , which lead to a brand of magic that’s more “sci-fi “ aesthetic than its earth counterpart.

Thanks to a life full of space adventures, Void Caster is what most people would describe as “quirky” as she very new to a lot of concepts on earth , like selfies! She always has a smile on her face and a sparkle in her eyes, though those sparkles can be seem almost forced sometimes. But she generally curious to the world around her and always open to learning new concepts!

You wouldn’t think it , but Void Caster’s seemingly mundane mother has a lot more in common with her daughter than either of the two release, though what remains a mystery.

Void Caster main ability is to create worm holes to transport to one place to the other, which is the main form of transportation for the whole team, she is also capable of making items shrink and grow whatever size she wants and effect gravity of those said items. The limits of her powers though is that she can only effect the size of an object as long as she can see it without straining (so she can’t turn people into the size of an atom or make someone be big enough to sit on the sun) she also struggles to change her own size (she’s very self conscious of it) her portal powers also have a similar size limit (she can’t make a planet size portal but making one a size of a tank would be possible, but straining for her)

Artist comments:

So with Trailblazer’s redesign I could’ve went with one of two options:

Make her a Native American and very likely make her a stereotype due to my lack of knowledge on the culture.

Or

An obvious Dora the Explorer knock off

I went with making her an obvious Dora the Explorer knock off , with a bit of a sci- fi twist to her. Her hair being a short bob is an obvious nod to Dora, as well as sticking with a pink and purple colour scheme which was also a way of ditching the all neon palette she originally had.

While she still has pockets , I completely ditched the bag all together and instead made it so she had space themed powers instead. I went with the weird idea of “witches but from space” since I didn’t want her to be a mutant as there were already 3 mutants on my redesign of the team, but adding onto the weirdness I also made it so her style was more “quirky” in comparison to her teammates , as well as stand out as the leader of her team.

I like to think that she’s a very outgoing girl but doesn’t grasp social ques all that well and usually ends up feeling like an annoyance to people when she tries to connect with others, though she also struggles with her more negative feelings and tries bottling them down to avoid bothering people , only for those feelings to explode at the most inconvenient time.

So naturally her biggest character flaw would be that she tries too hard to please people and fit in and that she’ll have to learn that she can find friends without sacrificing her own quirks, and that expression negative emotions isn’t a burden to anyone.

Screen time is the worst so I made him Brain scan

With the others I made in depth backstories and such for them as well as some notes on their rewritten character.

But here I didn’t, I honestly hate screen time , his the worst character outta everybody if you ask me and the first I would throw off a cliff if given the chance.

This is less of a redesign and just me making up a straight up oc here cause what the hell is “internet gas”???

Soooo uh, Screen time is now brain scan.

His an autistic kid who spends most of his time online cause his power of telepathy makes it extremely difficult to be around people. He learns to control his peers and socialise more

I’m sorry , that’s literally all I could do here.

(If I do turn these redesigns into my own ocs, I would 110% make “him” a “she” ;) )

[cdelphiki]

Jason saw it happen before it did.  

It was one of the many, many reasons he hated working with the bats.  They had no idea how to deal with his style of combat.

But that’s what happens when the Bat refuses to let any of his precious little soldiers train with guns.  They have no idea how to fight with them.

Now, perhaps that was a bit unfair.  The demon should know how to work alongside firearms.  Should know better than to jump in front of any gun, especially that of his ally.  Especially when it’s being fired.  Especially without warning. But the demon could be pretty thick sometimes.

Him and his stupid tunnel vision.

That’s what caused this situation.

Jason hadn’t even been aware Damian was there. 

Why was Damian in the warehouse with him, and why the fuck was he getting himself involved in Jason’s case?

This was solidly a Red Hood case.  No need for any of the bats to get involved.  And definitely no reason for Robin to get involved.

Yet here he was.

Dropping down from the rafters just as Jason was pulling the trigger.  Aimed at the guy’s leg, thank you very much.  Even if every last thug in this warehouse deserved death.  

This was a child trafficking ring, after all.  

And Jason saw it all happen before it did.  Damian dropped down too suddenly, his yellow cape barely a flash in Jason’s vision before his body was fully in front of Jason’s outstretched arm.  In front of the barrel of his gun.  His finger was already squeezing, his aim set.  No movement could have saved him.  

There was nothing Jason could do but watch in slow-motion horror as the bullet exploded out of his glock and ripped into Damian’s back.  Right into his side, probably hitting a rib and nicking his lung.  

“Holy fuck, kid,” Jason shouted, leaping over Damian’s crumpling form to shoot the last few men left standing, including the idiot Damian just shielded, “What the shit?”

Had he been shielding this moron?  Jason sure hoped not, because they would need to have a serious discussion about who is worth Damian’s life.  Human traffickers with a penchant for 6-year-olds definitely were not it.

Panting now, Jason spun back to face Damian, taking in the way he was hunched over, barely keeping himself up on his knees with one hand, the other doing absolutely nothing as it clutched at the front exit wound.  “Didn’t your mom ever teach you not to jump in front of a gun?” 

Damian cut his eyes up at Jason and let out a bitter, scathing, “Didn’t she teach you not to shoot at allies?”

“This is not my fucking fault!” he shouted, running over and sliding to a stop right in front of the brat, on his knees to assess the wound, “You jumped in front of me.  You didn’t even warn me you were there you stupid fucking brat.”

“Tt.” 

It was bad.  

The usual fire engine red of Robin’s tunic was quickly morphing into a deep crimson as Damian’s breathing became labored.  

“Shit.”  Jason started rifling around his supplies, trying his best to staunch the bleeding.  But there was so much.  It was happening so fast.  “Shit shit shit.”

Robin was going to die.  Right here in front of Jason.  

Bruce was going to be so pissed.

Fuck.

“How stupid are you?” he mumbled, pressing more gauze on Damian’s back.  He was basically cradling the brat in his arms now as he attempted to quell the bleeding on both sides at once.  

“I’m not the one,” Damian wheezed, then paused to take in a breath, his right hand clumsily attempting to help Jason apply pressure to the front wound, “who shot his ally.”

“I was pulling the trigger  before I saw you!”  Jason pulled out the last of his gauze and added it to the back set, which had already bled through.  The front was bleeding through, too.  “Fuck, where do you keep your supplies?”

With his left hand, Damian tapped at a pocket, so Jason raided it for more.  “Did you call for backup?”

Damian grimaced.  

Of course he fucking didn’t.

“You stupid brat if you die I am going to kill you.”

“Well you are…. The one who… shot me.”

“Shut up!” Jason reached up and felt around the comm in Damian’s ear for the button, then started babbling once he thought it was on. 

“Fuck I need backup here.  This stupid little bird went and got himself shot and he needs medical attention.  Probably five minutes ago.  Shit.  Robin is it working are they hearing me?”

“Yes,” Damian bit out, “I’m fine… Red Hood… shot me.”

“He jumped in front of my gun,” Jason shouted, already having flashbacks of Bruce beating the shit out of him.  Or flash-forwards.  Visions.  Something. 

Bruce was going to kill him.

“Affirmative,” Damian wheezed, his head lulling a little forward, “Friendly… fire.”

“Dammit, Dames.  I swear to God.  Stop leaking all your blood out, it’s supposed to stay inside.”  

“Do you ever… shut up…  You malodorous oaf.”

Jason scowled at the brat, resisting the urge to pause in his tight wrapping of Damian’s torso. “Did you just call me a malodorous oaf?  What are you?  Eight?”

Well, actually.  He’s eleven.  So close enough.

“Tt.”  A good ten seconds passed before Damian added, his speech slurring, “That is what you are.”

“Is your comeback really ‘I know you are but what am I?’ Oh my God, who even are you?”

“Todd,” Damian said, his head slumping fully forward, landing on Jason’s chest. 

And Jason heard a lot in that one word.  In his name.  It was almost like a plea for help.  For comfort.  For reassurance, maybe?

Stop panicking, Todd.  You need to keep it together for the little guy.

Jason hefted Damian up into his arms as he stood, ready to run out into the street and find a way to help Damian himself.  “It’s okay, brat.  You’re fine.”

His little body was too still in his arms.  His breathing too shallow.  His face too pale.

The red staining the bandages was too much for Jason to look at, so he wrapped the brat’s cape around.  The black outer-layer would at least conceal the blood.  

“Come on, Damian.  Stay with me, okay?”

It was quiet.  So quiet Jason almost missed it, but Damian let out a soft, “Tt,” that reignited Jason’s drive to save him.  It wasn’t too late.  He just needed attention within the next couple minutes, and he’d be fine.  

Jason was about at the point of ripping the kid’s comm out of his ear and shoving it into his own, but the second he stepped outside the warehouse, he could hear the batmobile racing toward him.  It was three blocks away, at most.  

“I think the comm is still active,” Jason said, clutching Damian a little tighter to his chest, “We’re standing right outside the warehouse now.  Hurry, he’s lost consciousness.”

“Hnnnn,” Damian groaned, making Jason roll his eyes.

“He’s almost lost consciousness,” he amended, just as the batmobile came to a screeching halt in front of him.  

“Get in,” Batman growled, the passenger door sliding open in one smooth motion, “both of you.”

Nodding shakily, Jason hopped in, barely getting the door shut behind him before Batman was racing off again.  

He slid the chair back so he could set Damian in it and kneel in the space between the dash and the seat.  Batman pressed a button that reclined the chair back all the way, turning it into a makeshift cot.  

“There is more gauze in the compartment under the seat, and a pint of Damian’s blood in the refrigerator behind mine,” Bruce grumbled.  

The next fifteen minutes passed by in a blur.  A blur of Jason performing emergency first aid while Bruce tensely sped them back to the cave.  

Damian…

Damian required surgery.  There was some internal bleeding as well as the obvious external.  Leslie had to be called in.  He needed several more transfusions and was in surgery for hours.  

It wasn’t until about 10 in the morning did Jason get to change out of his uniform.  Shower off all the dried sweat and blood from his body.  Let out a long breath.  

He was still in the cave and Bruce hadn’t said more than two words to him outside shouting commands regarding Damian’s treatment.  

Jason had shot Damian.

Again. 

And he’d almost died.

Again. 

If he were Bruce, he’d ship him off to Arkham right now.  Or get in touch with Superman and figure out a way to send him off to the Phantom Zone.  

Or just kill him. 

But knowing Bruce, he was probably just going to get screamed at and punched a few times.  Just like all the other villains in Gotham.  

He really should put his armor back on, he thought idly as he slipped on one of Bruce’s t-shirts and a pair of his sweats Jason had found in one of the lockers.  But he didn’t really deserve the protection it offered.  

Damian almost died. 

Slowly, Jason made his way out of the showers and back into the cave proper.  He didn’t even put shoes on.  Just socks.  He wasn’t really expecting being able to leave anytime soon, anyway.  

“Jay,” Bruce greeted tiredly from where he was keeping vigil at Damian’s bedside.  He’d also showered and changed, but probably upstairs or something.  Since Jason hadn’t seen him in the cave’s facilities.  

“Bruce,” he said back, sticking his hands in his pockets, refusing to step closer.  If Bruce wanted to do this, he’d have to come to Jason.  He prepared himself for the lecture.  For the screaming.  For the accusations of trying to kill Damian.  Again.  

It’s all his own brain was yelling at him.

“His vitals have stabilized,” Bruce said instead, turning his head back to the sleeping form on the cot, “he should be fine.”

“That’s good,” Jason rasped, nodding.  

A good minute passed.  Then two.  Three.  All in tense silence. 

“I’m sorry,” Jason finally said, at the same time Bruce rushed out a pained, “Thank you.”

Which, actually got Jason’s attention.  “Wait, what?”

“Thank you,” Bruce repeated, “for taking care of him.”

“But,” Jason stuttered, “but I shot him.”

“He jumped in front of your bullet,” Bruce said simply, “It’s different.”

“It-” Jason spluttered, blinking at Batman.  At Bruce.  

Who the fuck was this guy and what had he done to the normal broody asshole?

Jason flinched as Bruce walked closer, eliciting a frown from the man as he did.  Regardless, Bruce placed a hand on the base of Jason’s neck, squeezing just slightly.  Just enough to provide that modicum of comfort.  That morsel of reassurance. 

“This was not your fault,” Bruce asserted, shaking Jason ever so slightly, as if to force his words to penetrate Jason’s walls.  To go in deep and stick.  “You did good.  You saved him.”

“But, I-” Jason said, and he hated himself for how whiney his voice sounded.  How broken and despairing. 

“You did good,” Bruce repeated, dragging Jason in close to wrap his arms around, “He’s fine.  You did good.”

“Okay,” Jason whispered, because he had nothing else to say.  Nothing was coming to mind.  

Because Bruce was hugging him and practically saying he was proud.  

There was nothing to say to that.

Because that’s all he ever wanted.  

It wasn’t his fault. 

Damian was going to be fine.

“You did good.”

Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown. org/works/17738375

[dashesofink]

Finally Useful

Drabble: ”I just discovered your blog and it's AWESOME! Love your work!! I was wondering if you could make an imagine with fem!reader being the 8th sibling with a healing power (like... Wolverine's accelerated healing) and because her power it's not meant for fighting she got benched along with Vanya? Maybe she saves Luther with a blood transfusion?” @rachelaudreydelarosamontoya

Pairing: platonic!Luther Hargreeves x Reader (I guess)

Word Count: 1178

Notes: None

Warnings: mentions of blood,

Genre: kinda angsty, I guess

You absolutely despised the academy, but you didn’t really have a choice but to stay. Everyone eventually left, finding someplace that they felt most comfortable in or around, but you? Who wanted to be around someone that never got hurt, or seemed to never age? Quite literally no one, not even your own family. So even after everyone left, you stayed behind with your mom, Pogo, Reginald and unfortunately, Luther.

Having an accelerated healing rate meant that people seemed to think that you didn’t know how to fight. According to your dad, you “weren’t up to par in the fighting area, so you need to stay behind with Vanya.” God, how much you loathed your dad. If it wasn’t for him, both you and Vanya, your sister, would’ve been much better off in the world. Despite being left at home while your other siblings left for missions, you were able to find other things to occupy yourself. While you never really did catch on to an instrument quite like Vanya had, you found the human body quite fascinating. Grace helped you to further your knowledge on biology, and soon enough you found yourself becoming the family doctor. Whenever they would come home from a mission with cuts, bruises, or both, you were the one to patch them up. With the help of Grace of course.

However, once everyone moved off, that left you nothing but your ‘parents’ company and an empty house. Each time you walked past a mirror, you found yourself faced with the reality that you’d never really be like a normal person; not only did your wounds heal extraordinarily fast, but that also meant that your body didn’t grow as fast, as your ailments were always healed quickly. You may have mentally been almost 30, but you physically looked to be barely 20. Apparently though, despite the fact that you tried on numerous occasions to rid yourself of the torment that came from being at the academy, Reginald still liked to bother you.

You remember when he suddenly called you down into the infirmary. Well, really it was Pogo, who barged into your room with an urgent, almost fearful look in his eyes. You were confused at first, but when he explained that Luther had come back from his solo mission in critical condition, you jumped to your feet and raced down to the infirmary. Grace had already hooked up an IV into his arm, and though Reginald didn’t appear to know what he was doing, he was still shouting orders to try and save your brothers life. Almost immediately you jumped into action, your body seeming to move on its own as you began hooking up differently machines to Luther’s unconscious body all while applying pressure to the gaping wound and many burns that covered his chest.

“How long has he been like this?” You remember asking, blood already soaking the front of your shirt as you basically climbed over Luther to keep pressure on his wound. Reginald gave you a quick reply before you began searching the room for a clean towel, however Grace already had one placed over Luther’s chest as you threw the blood-soaked one in your hands away. “Jesus Christ, I’m not sure he’s gonna make it at this rate.”

Both you and Reginald cursed when you heared the blaring alarm of the heart monitor begin to go off, your eyes widening before you backed away from his body so Grace could try and revive him. It was a split second decision that you made, grabbing a needle and shoving it haphazardly into the crook of your elbow. You usually weren’t one to think that quick on your feet, but your brothers life was at stake. “What’re you doing?!” Reginald’s voice echoed through the air as Grace continued to try and shock Luther’s heart back to life, but you shot him a heavy glare in reply as you reached for the other end of the tube that was connected to the needle in your arm.

“If my blood can heal my body at an accelerated rate, then maybe it’ll do the same for Luther.” You stated, ignoring the look that your father sent you as you tried to clean Luther’s arm off with a cleanish towel. Both Pogo and Grace seemed to have the same idea as you, and Grace quickly abandoned the defibrillator paddles and hurried to your side as you prepped Luther’s arm. Pogo tried his best to calm Reginald down, but the longer that Luther’s heart flatlined, the more angry he seemed to get. Within moments, however, you had sent the needle deep into the crook of Luther’s arm, and soon enough you watched as your blood traveled from your arm, through the tube, and into Luther’s arm.

The room went silent for a moment, and everyone held their breath as you waited to see if your blood had the same effect on Luther’s body as it did for yours. Soon enough, though, and much to the relief of everyone in the room, the heart monitor stabilized and same as your body usually did, you watched as the hole in Luther’s chest, as well as the burns, seemed to slowly heal themselves. In all honesty, you weren’t expecting your blood to heal Luther at all, especially at the rate that it was, so despite how confident you seemed a minute ago, you were just about as shocked as everyone else. “Well, how’s that for thinking on my feet, eh?” Your comment to one of Reginald’s earlier statements about you went unnoticed as he let out a sigh of relief, and he gave Pogo a knowing nod before spinning on his heels and quickly making his way back to his office.

“Well done, master y/n.” Pogo gave your shoulder a small pat as he followed after Reginald, his lips pulling into a tight smile before he completely disappeared. You scoffed at his words, shaking your head in annoyance before you turned back to Luther’s body.

“You did well, y/n.” Grace’s soft voice rang through your ears before you looked towards her, her blue polka-dotted dress covered in blood as she tried to clean up the infirmary a bit. You gave a small shrug in reply as you glanced back to the heart monitor, a sigh falling past your lips as you grabbed a nearby chair to sit on. “Don’t worry, thanks to your transfusion, Luther is going to be fine, dear.”

You glanced wearily to the transfusion tube that was attached to your arm, the deep red blood flowing through it and into Luther’s arm glaring back at you. If it wasn’t for your blood, you would be useless. That’s all everyone really seemed to care about though, isn’t it? How useful you were supposed to be. “Yeah,” You murmured, resting your cheek against the palm of your hand as you leaned against the table, and you eyed the side of Luther’s head as Grace continued to clean up around you. “All thanks to me, huh?”

[sweetness47]

New Coffee, New Chance, part 6

Pairing Misha x reader

Warnings: Probably smut, language, violence

Summary: You ran from an abusive relationship, and found new hope in a chance encounter with Misha Collins. He has been nothing but nice to you, and has fallen in love with you. You in return have fallen in love with him. But the danger is far from over. Your asshole husband avoided arrest, and is now threatening you, and everyone you love and care about.

I open my eyes as I feel warmth beside me, then smile as I remember the events of the night before. My gaze goes to the man laying beside me, his body half covered by the sheets, half covered by me. I stretch out, and my skin tingles where it meets his. Everything about this man has me enamored, his scent invades my nostrils, his touch sends shivers in all the right places. I know he plays an angel on T.V. but I wouldn’t be surprised if he was one in real life. I drape my arm over his chest, and he turns toward me, placing a kiss on my forehead. I bury my face in him, sighing with overflowing happiness.

“Morning. How did you sleep last night?” Misha asks tenderly. His large hand traces circles on my arm and down my bare back.

I look up into his sparkling eyes. “That is honestly the best sleep I have had in years. You make me feel safe Misha. But last night? Last night was absolute bliss. I haven’t experienced anything that wonderful, not even when my marriage was good.” I stop and bring myself up on my elbow so I can look directly at him. “Thank you. I really needed this.”

He takes my mouth and captures it lightly with his. “You’re welcome Y/N. I rather enjoyed it myself.” He chuckles and my heart melts again. “I sent a message to Jensen and Jared last night after you fell asleep. I let them know about the note so they could be on guard.”

I nod but my body shivers at the reminder. Misha pulls me close and kisses my neck, and runs his tongue along my shoulders, my breasts. His goal is to take my mind off Daryl and his threats. It works. Soon he rolls me on top of him and brings his large erection to meet my waiting, wet hole. Misha thrusts inside, and I arch back as he makes me orgasm instantly again. I don’t know how he does it. But he doesn’t slow down. He pushes hard, grinding and pumping fast, climaxing, causing my second orgasm. We leave the bed and shower, which takes another half hour, not that I am complaining or anything, quite the opposite actually. I’m pretty sure the neighbours are going to be wondering if I watch porn.

I make waffles this morning while Misha checks in with my cousin and Jensen. Both assure him that they have taken extra precautions with regards to safety. The kids will be watched at all times, and both sets of families are going to be allowed on set today with me. This is a good idea, it ensures that Gen and Danne and the kids will all be safe and secure. And I get company while the guys work, so it’s a win for me as well. As per usual, I am greeted with numerous hugs and kisses from tiny adorable kids and awesome friends. We all sit on a picnic blanket near the set, and spend the afternoon playing games and eating a picnic lunch that Gen prepared for us. The bodyguards surround all of us in almost a cocoon of protection as we have fun.

As the filming wraps up for the day, I help Gen and Danne pack up the kids, games and food. We are all laughing and I have been roped into playing tag with Tomas, Austin, and Justice Jay, or JJ as I like to call her, much to Jensen’s dismay. I happen to be ‘it’, something all the kids agreed to without me. I laugh and chase the children around the set and towards the waiting vehicles. As I chase them, I notice something out of the corner of my eye and I stop. I call the kids back, and they come running, thinking I’m still playing, which is good in this case. I’m feeling really uneasy.

My feelings are justified as Jared’s van is suddenly engulfed in flames, and Jensen’s follows suit. We all rush to gather the children and head for the closest building, one we know for sure is secure. But where is JJ? None of us have her, and I frantically turn around to search for her. I spot her huddled behind some barrels, pinned down by the hot flames. The bodyguards can’t get to her, the opening where she could get out is too big for them to crawl into. But I am small enough. I run as fast as I can towards JJ, and dive inside the small opening. Gathering the child in my arms I make my way out and run toward everyone else. Suddenly I feel something sting my side, but I ignore it as I reach the door and shove JJ into Jensen’s arms. As I follow, I grab my ribcage, and feel a sticky warmth. I bring my hand up to find it covered in blood, my blood. I lose consciousness and fall to the ground.

I wake up, and my side feels like it’s on fire. I’m in a hospital bed attached to an I.V. Misha is sitting in a chair beside my bed, holding his head in his hands, looking like he hasn’t slept in days. I gently reach over and take his hand in mine, and he is instantly awake, relief flooding his perfect face. He showers the back of my hand with gentle kisses and reaches over to plant a kiss on my lips as well. I smile as he does this.

“Y/N! Thank God you’re awake. It’s been 3 days since the incident at the studios. You were shot when you rescued Justice Jay, who is very impatient for you to be better so she can smother you with hugs for saving her life. How are you feeling?” Misha asks with deep concern.

I clear my throat, and reply, “I feel like I got hit with a semi truck. You didn’t happen to get the license plate number did you?” I try to make a joke and end up with pain shooting along my left side as I laugh. Misha chuckles lightly, but then looks at me sternly.

“You shouldn’t be making jokes Y/N. This is serious. You shouldn’t have run into the open like that. That was a stupid, reckless move that could have gotten you killed! I almost lost you, and I don’t think I could live with that.”

I look over at Misha. “I couldn’t let JJ just sit there, trapped. No one else was able to get to her quick enough. And besides, I was the only one small enough to crawl in to that tiny space and get her out! So please don’t tell me I was reckless. I did what I knew to be the right thing. I saved JJ first. You know I’m right Misha.” I say just as sternly.

Misha sighs and squeezes my hand. “I know. And I would have done the same thing in your place. We all would have. I just don’t want to lose you. I plan to marry you when this whole fiasco is over, and have a big family. I want you beside me for the rest of our lives. I want to grow old with you, and spoil our grandchildren together, and sit together in the lounge in the old folks home with you.” He grinned as he spoke the last part, and I giggled again, but the pain was worth it. He was worth it.

Misha called Jared, who immediately came over with Jensen and the families. I was flooded with affection, a little more gently than normal, but loved none the less. JJ drew me a picture and made me a card, thanking me for saving her. Jared and Jensen both brought flowers and cards, while Gen and Danne both snuck in some decent food for when I was feeling better. Hospital food sucks, something else everyone agrees on. Tomas was very excited to mention he helped his mom make the cupcakes for me, and even picked all the decorations and colors. I thanked him and took a small bite of a pink and green with yellow sprinkles cupcake. I smiled warmly at Tomas, then at Gen, who made sure the recipe was perfect for the ‘add-ins’ that the boys did.

I also ate some of the brownies that Danne made with Justice Jay. They were moist and absolutely heavenly. Soon after, visiting hours were over, and most of my company had to leave. Jared promised he would be by tomorrow and took his family home, but not before kissing my cheek affectionately. Jensen gave me a light hug and a kiss on my forehead, thanking me for saving his little girl. Then he took his family home as well. As they all left, I noticed the large amount of police presence and tons of bodyguards. The doctor and the nurses allow Misha to stay with me, and even bring in an extra bed for him to use instead of the chair.

I learn from the doctor that the bullet didn’t hit any major organs, which was good news. I lost consciousness from the rapid blood loss. The bullet had grazed a major artery. But the doctor repaired it quickly and gave me a couple of transfusions to help rebuild my blood supply. I also learned it was Misha who donated the blood that helped save my life. He has type O blood, which means he is a universal donor. The police came in after the doctor left to state they were investigating what happened and how this went un-noticed by studio security. They were also combining this new incident with the other evidence and allegations relating to my shithead husband and the abuse I suffered at his hands.

A week later I am released from the hospital. Misha takes me to his place, determined to make sure I rest and relax. I begin to protest, but he stops me and ignores my rantings.  He carries me from the car to his house, and doesn’t let me walk anywhere. He places me gently in his bed, and goes to bring in my clothes and flowers from the car. I’m pretty sure he isn’t going to let me go to the washroom by myself at this rate. Once settled in, he comes to sit beside me on the bed.

“I am sorry if I seem a little over-protective Y/N. I just want you to get better. I hope you aren’t mad at me for all this pampering.” He says.

I give him my best puppy-dog eyes and a sweet smile. “Mad? Nah. I’ve always wanted a butler.” His voice rings out in genuine laughter as mine does. My side doesn’t hurt as much, but it’s still worth it just to hear him laugh. He leans in and kisses me, and I kiss him back. He doesn’t let it go too far though, I am still injured for another 2 weeks at least according to the doctor.

[imagineromanreigns]

Jukai

“What did you do, Tina?! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!”

That’s all I could say. What I saw, completely wiped my vocabulary of anything else. White bathroom tiles were covered with blood. The sources were two perfectly slit wrists, turning purple and stained.

“What did you do?!”

I was so scared to move her and my heart was pounding hard! But I couldn’t hear myself think with the twins crying madly in their cribs. I can’t just haul her to the ER without taking the time to get the babies in tow. She’s already lost so much blood that the delay may kill her. Fuck, or is she already dead?! How long has she been like this? Frantically, I reached into my back pocket and grabbed my phone.

Dispatcher: 911, what’s your emergency?

“My wife tried to commit suicide by slitting her wrists! I need an ambulance here now!”

Dispatcher: Ok, sir. Is she still breathing? Could you check for a pulse?

“Tina, baby. Stay with me! PLEASE!” I grabbed her face, watching her head lifelessly fall towards me.

My throat was getting tight. “Yes, she’s still with me. Send someone please! Can I wrap her wrists to stop the bleeding?! I don’t know how long she’s been like this and there’s already a lot of blood loss!

Rushed tears fled down my cheeks. “Please.. help my wife!”

Dispatcher: Calm down, sir. I understand this is a serious matter and I will do what I can do get her help, okay? What’s your address and full name?

“Joe Anoa’i. 423 Gracehill Dr.” My voice cracked to the dispatch.

Dispatcher: Help is on the way, Mr. Anoa’i. In the meantime, yes, I would advise you to wrap her wrists to stop more bleeding.

“Thank you!”

I tossed my phone across the tiles, as I grabbed two bath cloths and tied them around the bloody wrists. The bleeding had slowed its flow, but it didn’t stop. Tina’s breathing was getting slower but remaining steady. I couldn’t resist it anymore. I tucked her into my arms and cried into her soft neck. Tendrils of her hair dipped into the red puddles, while I cradled her. Her eyeballs moved sporadically behind her eyelids.

“Why would you do this to yourself?” I sniff. “Just why? Did you not want to be with me anymore? Was it something I did to hurt you? Baby, just tell me please!” More tears burst through with a yell that temporarily quieted the twins.

I could soon hear sirens coming from up the street, and without hesitation I stood up with Tina in tow. Before the EMTs could even make it out the ambulance, I had Tina at the back of the truck. They rushed out, immediately opening the doors, and taking my comatose wife out of my grasp. The female EMT helped secure Tina on the bed. Her partner was grabbing medical tools and preparing to check vital signs.

“Mr. Anoa’i?”

I stood dazed at the sight of my wife’s life slowly slipping away. It took for the female EMT to touch my arm gently and pull me back.

“Y-yes, sorry.”

She shook her head, “No, it’s okay. I just need to know are you coming with us because we want to get her to a hospital ASAP.”

I looked back at the house, remembering my girls still inside. “I have to grab our girls! Which hospital will you go to?”

She nodded and gave me the address to the hospital they were going to. Once the ambulance drove off, I hurried back inside to grab the twins and their packed bags. My heart was still racing madly. The nerves throughout my body were heavy as stone. After placing the now alert baby girls in the back seat safely fastened, I drove out of the garage and phoned my mom. I told her to meet us at the hospital to keep an eye on the girls. She was just as frantic as I was and before I knew it, I heard an engine roar through the phone.

“Mommy’s gonna be alright, okay?” I look at the rear view mirror. “Don’t you girls worry.”

The both made subtle noises in response.

Within minutes we arrived at the hospital and my heart rate spiked higher. It was as if I took a quick shot of adrenaline.

“Calm down, Joe. Get yourself together.” I muttered to myself with shaking hands. “Tina’s still alive, so stop thinking the worst.”

She’s okay. She’s okay. She’s okay.

Before I could start to cry again, I hopped out, placed both diaper bags criss-cross on my shoulders, and grabbed the car seats. I sped walked into the ER and headed to the receptionist desk.

“Hi, how may I help you, sir?” The petite woman greeted pleasantly.

“Uh, yes. My wife was just admitted here and I desperately need to get to her.”

She turned her attention to her computer. “Okay, what’s her name?”

“Tina Ross-Anoa’i.”

“She’s in room 282A down this hall. I can have a nurse escort you there, if you could wait for a moment. I can also ask her if she could take the babies to the nursery for you.” She picked up her phone.

“I’d really appreciate that.” I sternly nod.

“Can I get a nurse to the front for assistance? A nurse to the front for assistance.” The intercom roared through the ER.

Within seconds a tall, brown haired woman came power walking towards the desk. She wore soft blue scrubs and looked like she’d already had one helluva night.

“What Can I do for you, Lucy?” She placed her arm on the desk.

“Nurse Jackie, this is Mr. Anoa’i. He’s here to see his wife in 282A. I was wondering if you could escort him to her and take the babies to the nursery.”

The nurse turned her attention to me with wide eyes. “Oh God, yes! Come this way. I just left your wife’s room an—“

“How is she doing?!”

“She’s better now,” Nurse Jackie thinned her lips. “But there was a lot of blood loss. By the time she got to us, she had almost gone cold. Thankfully, we had her blood type in stock and gave her an emergency transfusion. She was already heavily sedated by the muscle relaxers she’d overdose on, so we went on with the procedure.”

“Fuck,” I clenched the seat handles tighter. “She overdosed too?”

“Follow me, Mr. Anoa’i. We can walk and talk on our way to the room.” She placed a hand on my trembling shoulder, as she guided me down the hall.

“As I was saying, it seems that before she slit her wrists, there was a pill overdose. Do any of you take muscle relaxers?”

“I do. I’m a professional athlete and I have a prescription for them when I pull muscles.” I shake my head, cursing myself for leaving those at home. “But Tina never had a reason to take them.”

She nodded, “Understood. Well I’m sure you’ll know then that we had to do a gastric lavage as well. With those pills still in her system, there wasn’t any chance of her living on top of the major blood loss.”

All I could do was nod my response. I was speechless. I had no idea that she’d taken my pills. Now that I think about it, that it explains why I couldn’t find them in my gym bag yesterday.

Nurse Jackie stopped us in front of 282A and walked me in. She stood at the foot of the bed, as I stood statue still by the door. I could’ve hit the floor from the sight of my wife. She appeared lifeless, but I could see her chest slowly inflate. The heart monitor’s beeps seemed to show steady signs of life, however it all appeared to be an illusion. This is purely something I wanted to see but it doesn’t mean it’s real.

Of course she’s alive!

But I see different just staring at her. Color has resurfaced in her skin. Her hair had been washed and gathered over one shoulder. Just an hour ago it was washed in blood. My chest tightened at the flashback.

This isn’t an illusion. Tina’s still here. The mother of my beautiful girls is still breathing.

“She seems peaceful.” Nurse Jackie grins back at me, then turned back to Tina. “But I’d advise she gets some help. Whatever was troubling her surely took a huge toll. Next time, she may be successful if she tries again.”

Finally, I broke away the stone and ordered my legs to move. I grabbed the chair closer to the bed and grabbed her hand. White gauze was wrapped securely around both wrists. I rubbed a thumb slightly over her wrist and felt stitches.

Tina...

“I would like to provide you with the contact information for my wife, Dr. Ambers. She’s been a licensed psychiatrist going on three years now and she’s simply amazing.” Nurse Jackie retrieved a small notepad and pen from her pocket.

“Thank you very much for your help, Nurse Jackie. We’ll be giving her a call first thing in the morning.” I folded the paper once and placed it in my pocket with my free hand.

She nodded, “Sounds good, Mr. Anoa’i.”

The good nurse checked her watch. “Well, it’s my lunch time and I will leave you with Tina. If anything happens, don’t hesitate to press the emergency button.”

I kiss the back of Tina’s hand. “Yes ma’am.”

I waited until the door was securely closed shut after her exit. Immediately, I started to cry. The images flashed around and around in my head of the day. I come home from the airport to crying babies and a wife half way dead on our bathroom floor. I felt that something was wrong from our last phone call. Her voice wasn’t the usual cheery tone I’d always hear when I was coming back home. They were few. She kept saying that she was exhausted and had a headache. But I’ve seen and heard her exhausted. I’ve seen and heard her with a headache. It wasn’t anything like what I heard on the phone. Something was truly wrong with my wife and I wasn’t here to comfort her. The pain in my chest twisted more, forming another lump in my throat.

“Tina, why didn’t you just tell me? Why couldn’t you just wait until I’d gotten home to help you?” I said through my sobs.

I laid my head down on my forearm on the bed. I lightly kissed her covered wrist and continued holding her hand. My baby was okay. She was going to make it. There was a force stronger than her that wouldn’t allow her to leave us. Weight was slowly being lifted from my chest with those positive thoughts. Because they were true. I stared at her, still breathing, still beautiful, and still here with me.

The next day...

I kept feeling light touches on my face, from my forehead to my cheek. They felt familiar. Warm and welcoming. It was as if I was being awakened at home by —

My eyes flew opened. “Tina!” I said on a rushed whisper.

“Hope you dreamed of me.” Her smile was weak but sincere.

“Baby,” I stood up. “I’m so glad you’re still here.” I covered her face in kisses, as she brought her hands to my face. “I’m so happy.”

“I’m so sorry,” She croaked, “Joe, I’m so sorry!”

“Shh shh. It’s okay, baby. It’s okay.” I said against her forehead.

She shook her head. “No, it’s not okay. I was so weak and troubled. I just couldn’t take that feeling anymore.”

“I had no idea you’d been feeling that way. Why didn’t you tell me?” I sat back down, grabbing both of her hands. “I’m your husband. You’re supposed to tell me these things. So why didn’t you, Tina?”

“Because it was my burden. I didn’t want you worrying and you had too much going on. I felt maybe it would go away eventually. It’s been three months now. Things should get better. But they kept getting heavier. Until finally, I felt like I couldn’t even breathe anymore.”

“Three months now? It’s been that lo—“ it occurred to me, “Your grandma died three months ago.” I said solemnly.

“Yes,” she confirmed. “I’ve been feeling incomplete ever since.” Her eyes close, “She was all I had left. My first best friend. I told her not to leave me yet, because I wasn’t ready for her to go. I still needed her.”

“Tina, you know she’s still here with you. Your grandma never left your side.”

“It’s not the same. I can’t just call her or drive to go see her. I can’t hug and kiss her like I used to do. She was my mama, Joe. She taught me how to be a woman. A wife and a mother. There’s still things I want to talk to her about but I’ll never be able to. I miss her laugh, her jokes, her love. I miss her so much.

“I’ve cried so much since her funeral that I can’t even cry anymore. That’s when I felt like it was my time to go.” She said.

I took in every word. Seeing the emotions flooding through her tired features. I do remember her grandma very well. I loved her from the moment I met her. It was something about her spirit that just made you want to be around her every hour of the day. Tina always referred to her as her mama, not grandma. That’s how close they were. She never wanted to talk about her biological mother. They haven’t talked in years and Tina had no issue with continuing that race. As long as she had her grandma, she was happy. So when I got the news that she died, I felt my heart break for Tina. What made it worse for her, I think, was watching her grandma slowly die in front of her. She died of old age, which I felt was a better way out than dying from a sickness. Her grandma lived a tough life but always made life seem beautiful. That’s one of the many things I admired about her.

“Baby, I know how much she meant to you. In the short years I’ve known her, she meant a lot to me as well. And I loved her as if she was my own grandma. So I know her death was going to be very hard for you to take. I just never thought it would drive you to try taking your own life. I didn’t know it hurt that bad.”

“I should’ve told you, Joe. I know I should have. But I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.” Her hands squeezed mines. “You should’ve been the first to know.” She winced.

“Be careful. You have stitches now.” I delicately rub her wrists.

“Right.” She sighs, “I’m sorry for stealing your pills.”

My voice hardened, “Tina, I hope you know that until I can trust you again, I’m taking every pill bottle we have out of the house. If you have any sort of body ache, I’ll give you want you need. But I’ll be damned if I discover that you’ve overdosed on something again. Those muscle relaxers could’ve permanently damaged you somehow if they didn’t kill you.”

Guilty, sad eyes looked at me. “Understood.”

Silence filled the room. Neither of us had a comeback. The sun was starting to shine more  as the morning progressed. Faint sounds of hospital activity were heard through the walls. I glanced at the digital clock over the door. It read, “7:53 AM.”

“I heard you talking to me last night.” She swallowed, “I wanted to tell you that it wasn’t because of you. But I was so out of it that my mouth wouldn’t move. Felt like my voice had vanished. When I no longer heard the girls crying, I thought that was the end. But then I somehow heard your voice. The fear I heard in your voice was so clear.”

“I thought you were already gone.” I shake my head. “You were lying there so still that I thought I was too late.” Fresh tears slid down my cheeks.

“I know. It felt like I was. But you pulled me from that darkness. I could hear my daughters’ cries again. That’s when I knew I couldn’t go back. I had to fight this, even as weak as I was, I had to try.” She wiped my droplets away, one by one.

There were soft knocks at the door until the knob turned. In walked Nurse Jackie, looking refreshed and energized for another day. Her face lit up as she took a good look at Tina.

“Well, good morning gorgeous! How are we feeling?”

Tina grinned. “Much better, thank you. For everything.”

Nurse Jackie waved her hand. “That’s my job, dear. As long as you’re still with us, that’s all the thanks I need. I’m sure Mr. Anoa’i would agree.” She looked in my direction.

“I definitely agree.” I say warmly.

“Mrs. Anoa’i, I recommended to your husband that you start seeing my wife, who’s a psychiatrist. She’s truly amazing and I’m sure with her help, you’ll be able to come overcome this unfortunate experience. Nurse Jackie’s eyes gain a sparkle. “That’s how I met her.

She continues, “It’s truly your choice, but I strongly feel you should consider it.”

“I appreciate that, ma’am. It’s taken me a long time to admit this, but I truly need the help. I can’t do this to my family ever again.” Tina looks back at me, softly squeezing my hand. “I love them too much to leave them this way.”

“And we love you more, baby. I want you to always remember that.” I stand and kiss her lips. “Always remember that, okay?”

She nods. “Always.”

[danahmbisyosangdoktora]

HI GUYS!!!! Oh my, it’s been a looooooong while. I actually went through my blog and re-read everything and I’ve noticed that I was always saying how “I don’t know what to and how to do blogging anymore” in most of my previous posts but I PROMISE THIS TIME, I LEGIT DON’T KNOW WHAT TO WRITE OR HOW DO I DO THIS ANYMORE because I haven’t done this for like forever. It felt like I’m starting again!!! Okay sige, I’m not gonna babble more. Let’s just hop right into my post.

Okay, so as what I’ve mentioned on my previous posts, I’ve entered Third Year or the Medtech proper last school year 2016-2017 and that’s (also) the reason why I was gone for a very long time. Idk, I just found myself being swallowed by acads and all that jazz that I never really had the time to write a single blogpost. There’s so much that has happened in my entire Third Year life and I wish I could’ve had written any of’em and immortalize the memories on this blog and hark back to those times... but sadly, I didn’t. Anyway, as you can probably tell on the title, this post would be a “rundown” of my experience as a Third Year Medical Technology student.

(Wait, how do I start?)

We started the school year earlier than the normal students in our university due to the reason that we were trying to chase the schedule for the 1-year internship so everything would fit and we would end just right on time for the graduation (yikes chills) because as you all know, we are one of those pabibo schools who embraced the academic calendar shift. So the clinical subjects I took this year are as follows:

1st Semester

MIC111 – Bacteriology

PAR100 – Clinical Parasitology

GPHC100 – General Pathology, Histopathology and Cytopathology

CC111 – Routine Clinical Chemistry

HEMA111 – Hematology 1

MTLBE100 – Medical Technology Laws and Bioethics

LMS100 – Laboratory Management and Supervision

2nd Semester

MIC112 – Mycology and Virology

UBF100 – Urinalysis and Body Fluids (Clinical Microscopy)

HEMA112 – Hematology 2

SIM100 – Serology and Immunology

CC112 – Continuation of CC1/ Special Chemistry

CC113 – Endocrinology, Toxicology and Drug Testing

IMH100 – Immunohematology (Blood Banking and Transfusion Medicine)

 I can’t believe I already passed all these subjects let alone the first sem subjects!!!! Personally, I think First semester is harder than the Second Semester idk maybe because it’s the time when we were just and still adapting to the new and toxic environment of Third Year life and the transition is quite overwhelming. Also, the passing rate was raised from 60% in Second Year to 70% in Third Year. I CAN’T EVEN!!! Plus the laboratory practical exams had an upgrade to like 5x that of the Second Year pracs. There’s legit a time when I went back to my dorm during lunch break just to cry because of a practical exam and a fair share of tears were shed at nights when I have no idea how to fit and finish everything before the sunrise. Also there’s a day when, for the first time in my life, I called my mom after I got back in my dorm from school and cried for my dear life because EVERYTHING WAS SO HARD.

It’s also during First Semester when I learned how essential it is to know the time difference from night (let’s say 7pm) to 5am the next day and how to utilize it very well because your life literally depends on how you manage and distribute it to sleeping and studying because you know, you’ll only have to read 1-3 chapters per subject and you only have like 3 quizzes the next day for the lecture and probably a practical exam or a long quiz for the laboratory in the afternoon. JUST HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PREPARE FOR THAT IN LESS THAN 10HRS???--- is all I was thinking then. That’s how resentful and pitiful I was back then.

We were taught the laboratory skills we need— Venipuncture (of course! the freaking highlight and a must), Blood Smearing, Staining, Pipetting!! Oh God forbid, I loathe glass pipetting so much! Direct Fecal Smear... and all medtech-y skills. I love Bacteriology so much. It was the subject I got the highest grade during First Semester. The lecture and laboratory were both the bomb.com. But ofc, I wouldn’t forget the anxiety the Unknown has given us. For our finals in the lab, we were given unknown organisms and we were to identify it via Biochemical Testing and everything we were taught of on how to identify such. It took me so long to decide what my organism was because some of the biochemical test results weren’t at par with theoretical information so imagine my anguish. Our grades basically depended on it so... yeah.

 but in the end, I decided it was Enterobacter cloacae.

Another memory from First Semester is the time when we were to submit Enterobius swabs as additional points for our Parasitology laboratory. I took my bestfriend with me to hunt down possible patients. It was such a memorable experience, I have no more words. I poured all the feels on this Facebook post.

 Also, I’ll never forget about First Semester is the day when we had our Grand Practical Exam in our laboratory subjects and it was the time when 3rd Floor HSC was in a total dishevelment. We were taking turns and rotating in different labs to have our moving practical exams simultaneously--- one section is having their Histopath moving pracs, the other is having their Bacte moving pracs, then another section is on the roil in Hematology moving pracs while the other one is having their Parasitology Moving Pracs and the like. That was the most intense day ever imaginable.

Also on that day, was the first time I was able to extract blood on a practical exam!!! I can never forget how stupid I may have looked for shouting “Hala may dugo” when blood oozed out from my partner’s vein. I was never able to bleed my partner in almost all the practicals we had due to my infamous phobia with needles and I was legit surprised and awed when a blood came out that day!!!

For the events of Second Semester... I’m not really sure?? lol even though it’s the more recent semester, I can’t remember much from it coz it went like a blur to me. It was so fast it was so unreal that it actually happened!!! (and that I passed!)

Okay. One thing I could say about Second Semester is that I fancy UBF hahahaha I’m not sure if it’s the subject itself or teacher factor hahahaha but to be honest, it was so fun to study and probably the easiest of the panel of subjects for second semester (or so I thought).

The laboratory learning and insights this semester gave me more of the medtech feels because most of the experiments/tests we did in the lab were the ones that are being performed in the actual laboratory setting. I will never forget the struggle of dilution in Serology lab. We aren’t allowed to use calculators during the entire semester and of course as someone who absolutely hates math and computation, that’s. the. worst. nightmare. ever. So given that situation, imagine our surprise during the Final Laboratory Written examination when our instructor finally allowed us to use calculator. Everybody in the class was in awe because that’s super unexpected. We didn’t have much of moving practical exams this sem compared to the numerous ones we had on first semester. The practical exams this time were more like skills-based and principle application. Slide identification-kind-of-moving practicals was surprisingly nakakamiss.

Self-pity time: Two semester have passed and no one was able to extract blood from me huhuhu do I even have veins??? :------(

Just to give you some insight, there are:

4 major examinations in each lecture subjects

2 major written examination in each laboratory subjects

(100-item identification)

Moving Practical Exam in each laboratory subjects

Skills/Application Practical Exam in each laboratory subjects

Pre and post quizzes in every meeting in each lecture subjects

Pre and post quizzes in every laboratory experiments

Long Quizzes every after chapter

Long Quizzes before major examination in each lecture subject

Long Quizzes before major examination in each laboratory subjects

Surprise quizzes whenever the professor would like

Not to mention the drawings of each specimen in laboratory manuals in each laboratory subject

2 Journal readings in each lecture subject

So ayun, hindi po kami OA and nag-iinarte. Our lives literally revolve in exams and quizzes.

Moving on, last May 09, we had our Pre-Internship Program which is a prerequisite before you can proceed to the actual internship. On that exact day,we took a 700-item Diagnostic Examination without any notice and I literally just came back from an 8-hour trip because I went home in Bicol so I was sitting for like 14 hours straight!!! We had series of practical examinations for two weeks, a Phlebotomy seminar with BD Philippines, a tour in a National Reference Laboratory which is the National Kidney Institute and an Oral Revalida.

CAUTION: Photospam ahead.

I’m not sure if this is enough to summarize everything because I can feel that it’s not even in the slightest bit justified on this post. Maybe it’s one of the wonders of life that cannot be really put into words. (But you tried, self what are you doing hahaha)

Suffice to say that all these experiences; the nerve-racking and heartbreaking quizzes, no-sleep days, tears, sweats, blood (hahahaha legit), cramming moments and all other hardships are the variables which played significant roles in this endeavour which lead me to where I am heading right now. I’m so happy and proud to share to you guys the next step I’m taking in this career path. I am now officially a Medical Technology Intern at St. Luke’s Medical Center – Quezon City under the Institute of Pathology. I know, I can’t believe it myself that I was able to pass through the needle-hole like hurdle you call “Third Year life”. SLMC is actually my first-in since we are to undergo 1-year internship and we will be having our second-in next semester in another hospital.

 I will be forever thankful to Trinity University of Asia especially to Dean Rodriguez for always making sure that the quality of education/ training is there. Thank you for a super hands-on laboratory experience and our very own DIagnostic Laboratory in the 4th Floor. It’s like a simulation of the environment that we will be facing in the near future. Would also like to thank our Clinical Instructors:

Mam Majo Liao

Sir Jude Anthony Trinidad

Dra. Mary Anne Isip

Sir Mark Francisco

Sir Mel Destacamento

Mam Gigi Dayrit

Mam Violie Bascao

Mam Suzzette Lumanga

Mam Rona Gonzaga

Sir Joshua Descamparado

Sir Nikko Onate

Mam Krystal Tio

 for gearing us up with all the lectures, wisdom and skills that we would need  to be the Medical Technologists that we are aiming to be.

 ---------------------------

Other significant life events during the course of Third Year life:

 I became an Altar Server at the Shrine of Jesus the Divine Word. Hashtag dream come true.

I was elected Medical Technology Councilor in the University Student Council. Hashtag unreal.

All glory and praise to the Lord God above. Thank you for guiding me in almost everything I do. Thank you also St. Jude Thaddeus for interceding for me. Forever grateful and blessed.

That’s pretty much how I can sum up my Third Year life. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing it! Thank you so much for reading yet another long blog post of mine. See you on my next post (hopefully there’s a next)!!!

[masonbellamy]

Blood of My Blood | Para

Tagging: Mason Bellamy & Liam Moran; mentions of Alby & Rose O’Riordan, and Lisa & Michelle Bellamy Location: Manhattan General Hospital Time Frame: Late afternoon; July 16, 2017 General Notes: After suspicions are raised, the connection between Mason and Alby turns out to run deeper than either of them could have imagined.

Though Liam Moran had had a couple of days to process this newest development in his already crazy life, he was still quite shocked as he sat and waited for the nurse to return with their test results. He’d reunited with his first love and the child they’d made together only because they happened to be paired up through the insane law that their government had heaped upon them, found out that he was going to be a father again and almost lost his son. Now, he was waiting to see if he’d fathered a second son. He’d donated his sperm as a young man, wanting to help out other couples after his own parents had had such a difficult time conceiving him. It had been one of the reasons that he’d gone into his branch of medicine after all. It was crazy to think that someone had chosen him to help after all and that almost three decades later, his son and his potential son were best friends. Hearing the sound of someone approaching, Liam looked up to see the latter heading towards him. He smiled softly and patted the seat next to him. Like most people visiting the still unconscious Alby in the hospital, Mason looked worse for wear. “How are you holding up?” He asked gently, his accent thick with worry as he ran his fingers through his short, dark hair.. “I had to get out of there. I know I’ve only known him a little while but that’s my kid in there, y’know.”

Tired was a vast understatement. Mason was exhausted but he couldn’t think of a stronger word or phrase for the feeling. Dead on his feet? Perhaps that was it there. When he ended his final show, the month and a half’s worth of sleep lost was on his mind more than anything else. Now, his best friend--who was already like a brother to him and very well could be--was lying in a coma fighting for his life. Days were running together before the tour had come to an end; he’d bitten a few heads over the past couple of days and enough people eventually gave up trying to get him to go home, stay home and sleep. He never left the hospital since finding out about Alby’s accident--other than to make an appearance at Alex and Levi’s wedding roughly an hour ago--and when the need for a blood transfusion sprouted the possibility of him not only having a half-brother, but also a father, Mason felt like his brain had been put in the blender. Between his moms and Dorothy, he and whoever else might have been at the hospital at the time were brought food and if he did manage to get any sleep, it was nothing to consider restful. Before returning from the wedding, Mason stopped by the cafeteria for some coffee, adding in some cream and sugar for himself. Since he didn’t know how Liam liked his, Mason left room at the top for the second cup he’d filled and picked up cream and sugar packets to bring back to the waiting room. Dark circles formed under his two-toned eyes and a small, invisible twitch came and went below his right eyebrow, as was the case whenever went too long without much sleep. He had given up on his contacts for the time being and was sporting his glasses for the time being. Sipping the hot beverage, he offered the other cup and packets to Liam before taking a seat. Mason’s shoulders rose and fell. Liam wasn’t a reporter so he didn’t have to save face with some generic, appeasing response; he really didn’t know how to answer the question. But he listened to Liam and nodded. “I get it enough... Knowing what you know now makes you care, regardless of how long you’ve actually known him.” He had no idea if what he just said made any sense at all but it sounded right in his head before he uttered the words. He took another sip of his coffee, eyes glazing over before he reached up under his lenses to rub them. “Can I ask you something?”

Taking the coffee and the packets offered, Liam made himself his usual cup of coffee - cream and one sugar - but added two extra packets. Sugar was good for shock, nerves, worry and just sadness in general and he still felt a mixture of all four emotions along with a host of others. Rose wasn’t eating or sleeping well and it couldn’t be good for the baby and Alby didn’t seem to be waking up anytime soon. He’d waited so long to have a family of his own, no woman ever coming close to the way his Rosie had made him feel, and now he was terrified that it would all be taken away from him in the blink of an eye. It hurt so badly to see Alby - his son - lying as still and as pale as death even though he’d only known him for a little under a month. He’d heard rumours that Rose had been pregnant when she’d left Ireland but he’d left not long after and had never known for sure. He turned his head and studied the man next to him. They had a similar face shape, their lips also - though the younger man’s were plumper. Though Mason’s sectoral heterochromia caused his eyes to be two different colours, the blue in their eyes was the same. Maybe he was just making up similarities between the two of them now that the idea that they might be related was in his head. Mason’s question drew him from his thoughts and he cleared his throat hoping that his voice didn’t break when he spoke. “Sure, Mason, what’s up?” The older man said finally.

Ever since the blood results indicated a possible relation between he and Liam, Mason was finding himself glancing at the older man, trying to find similarities between them as well, even despite himself since there wasn't anything certain yet. If it was true, it would explain where his naturally dark hair came from since his mom was blonde to her roots. Until now, he always assumed that the blue in his eyes was from his mom but now he wasn't so sure who he inherited them from--nevermind there would never be a definitive explanation for the third of brown in his left eye. He and his moms usually joked that that was from his mama even though they all knew better. When Liam gave him the go ahead for his question, Mason started out stating, “Before this law, I never gave any real thought to where the other half of my DNA came from. Moms were always enough and never made me feel like I had to know, and Rosie’s always been like a third mom to me for as long as I've known her... “ He didn't know why he felt compelled to share all of this with Liam but for some reason, Mason couldn't stop himself. “It wasn't until this law, when I knew I was going to have to be someone's dad someday that I began wondering. I didn't want to ask Moms since… I mean I've gone twenty-six years without a dad, or dad figure… I didn't want them to think I suddenly felt like they weren't enough for me.” With all his somber rambling, he almost forgot about the question and sighed at himself for it, carding a hand through his dark blond locks, briefly gripping at the brunette roots. “Were you anonymous?” He knew he should have been asking his mothers this question but his reason for asking Liam held purpose.

Liam listened to Mason as verbalised his thoughts, nodding along and occasionally humming when appropriate. It was the long way to the question but when he finally got to it, the older male took his time to organise his thoughts though he, too, was tired and it was a struggle. “Yes, but not because I didn’t want to ever have the chance to get to know any kids that might have come from my donation.” He sighed and raked his long fingers through his hair. “My parents struggled to have me but back then it wasn’t really a thing that middle class people could do - hell not even rich people did it so they just accepted that they would most likely never have children.” He smiled fondly, thinking about his parents. “They got lucky and had me after being childless for fifteen years. When I moved to the states, some friends were low on cash and were joking about going to the sperm bank and it just clicked in my head. If I donated, I could help other people like my parents who couldn’t have kids. So I decided to be anonymous to make things easy on the couple who chose me to help them.” He grinned sheepishly. “That was probably a long answer and way more than you wanted to hear. I don’t expect anything to come from this especially because you moms did a damn fine job of raising you without my ugly mug around, but if you want to know anything - about me or my family, health, whatever - I’d be happy to help.” He reached over, hesitating for a moment before patting him on the shoulder. “Or if you just want to go and get a beer some time to get your mind off things.”

Mason

took in Liam’s response to his question. There wasn’t any reason for him to think about the reason why Liam might have been an anonymous donor but he didn’t have to think about it when the explanation was already given to him. It was selfless; Mason admired Liam for that. He huffed the lightest chuckle at the compliment and simultaneous self-deprecation from the older man. Perhaps it was too strange to think about he and Liam having any sort of relationship exceeding friendship. It was nice to have him being open to talking about his family and anything else Mason might want to know, and that he was equally willing to keep their relationship casual. “Thanks, Liam. If it turns out we’re related, having those options...well, it means a lot to me.” For now, that was enough for the singer and whether or not that would ever change, Mason couldn’t think about it right now. It wasn’t common of him to let his thoughts get too far ahead since he generally lived in the moment. If being there in the hospital declared anything it was that life was too unpredictable to go solidifying your mind in what you think the future should be. Right now, they both had enough that they didn’t know, but some of that was about to change. As Mason brought his coffee cup to his mouth of another sip, he looked down past the end of his cup and saw a doctor approaching the two of them. Mason’s knee-jerk reaction was to get back on his feet and brace for an update on Alby, but after only a small lurch forward cut short, Mason made himself stay where he was. The doctor was holding a sealed manila envelope underneath a tablet when she approached the two men. “Good afternoon Mr. Moran, Mr. Bellamy. I have the results to your paternity test here with me, along with copies for each of you and your own records.” The doctor moved the envelope under her arm while turning the tablet around to show them the results. This time, Mason stood up and squinted at the screen from behind his glasses. He didn’t have a clue what he was being shown, with the abbreviations and alpha-numeric terms running down one column. The doctor’s explanation that was accompanying this mattered very little to him. What he really wanted to know already was just a “yes” or “no” from the doctor but they finally reached the moment, as well as the area on the screen as she guided her finger on the glass to move the page down and reveal a percentage summarizing the results. It was there on the screen, revealing a 98.79… the other decimal numbers didn’t matter when the odds were so overwhelmingly in favor of showing that he and Liam were blood relatives; Liam was his biological father, and Alby was his half-brother.

Nodding, Liam

couldn’t help but smile warmly. “If it’s the case, I’d like the chance to get to know you, not as Mason the celebrity or as my son’s best friend, but as yourself. I -” He thought about his words for a second and was about to speak when he noticed the doctor approaching him. For a moment he forgot while they were waiting there and his stomach lurched, his mind automatically going to Rosie keeping watch over Alby. “Alby..” He murmured, his legs twitching to get up and meet the doctor halfway before he remembered what they were waiting on. Leaning forward, Liam’s gaze skimmed the tablet, wishing he had thought to bring his glasses before he’d hurried to head back to the hospital. He skipped over the information looking to get to the crux of the information. He could always read through the rest later. 98.79%. Mason was his biological son. The doctor handed them both a copy of the paternity test before saying something and leaving them both alone. “So…” Liam started not quite sure where to go from there. “Um, Rosie’s pregnant. We found out the morning of…” He cleared his throat, suddenly nervous. What did Mason expect to get out of this? Now that his curiosity was satisfied where did they go from there? He knew that Mason had his parents, his moms who had done an amazing job raising him but he couldn’t help but find himself wanting to be in the younger man’s life in some way. This thought made him conflicted because he’d only ever become a donor to help another couple. He knew that, if anyone ever used his sperm to help them on their journey, he would never have had the chance be in the child’s life. Surely it was fate that they were sitting there now. “I don’t know what you expect from this or what your moms would prefer and you don’t have to call me dad. That might be a little strange to hear but… I’m just making a cock of things, aren’t I?”

Mason didn’t know what to make of the paternity test results If he were better rested he might have cracked a joke. He took the copy of the results and looked at the information identical to the tablet and folded it in half; he had taken off his tux jacket and would stick it in there later. His lips puckered slightly for the start of him saying, “Well” but the word never left his mouth. Liam beat him to speaking up and Mason looked at him expectedly, although for what exactly, he wasn’t sure. It sure as hell wasn’t what Liam said next. He knew Rosie was a young mother and Liam wasn’t exactly someone Mason would consider old either but how could he not be surprised by this? At this point, it was more surprising than getting confirmation on his and Liam’s relation to each other. “The morning of the accident? Alby’s wedding?...” His head slowly shook as the two questions left his mouth but he backpedaled, knowing it wasn’t completely his business. “So…” he repeated back. “Alby’s going to have a little brother or sister, and--” Was it accurate to ask if that meant he would have a half-brother or sister someday? Maybe he did need sleep after all--trying to make sense of things was bringing on a headache. It must have shown on his face from what Liam said to him next. “I… I think they would want me to do what’s best for me. I haven’t really talked to them too much about all of this and I know they’ve mostly just been thinking about Alby getting better, and me not surviving on hospital food since I’ve hardly left.” The idea of going on some sort of cinematic journey to figure out who his biological father was never crossed Mason’s mind, even when thinking about who his father might be. It sounded corny and exhausting. But now he didn’t have to consider anything of the sort. “What? No, no you’re not, I just…” Mason carded a hand through his hair, “I think, for now…” I think for now I don’t know up from sideways is what he wanted to say, but out loud, he told Liam, “...I’m going to talk with my moms. And wait until Alby’s awake.” Mason still refused to think Alby wouldn’t wake, but playing out scenarios in his head, nothing really felt right without getting to talk to Alby since he was affected by this news too. If he did find himself wanting to call Liam ‘Dad’ but Alby didn’t, or vice versa, wouldn’t that make it weird? Would his moms’ feelings be hurt like he assumed they would be? “I won’t keep you in the dark though, after I talk to them...and maybe get about two weeks’ worth of sleep.” Mason cracked a soft smirk from his own words but it soon faded as his face melted into a more meaningful expression. He kept thinking about how Liam wanted to get to know him better, as who he really was. Maybe Mason would grow to regret saying this one day but true to his ‘live in the moment’ nature, that wasn’t much of a present thought. What had been was exactly what came out of his mouth next. “I know we don’t know each other well yet. It’s... we’re going to change that no matter how we end up defining our relationship, but… I know enough for right now to say I’m glad you turned out to be my--” Mason bit the inside of his cheek and tugged on his neck tie like it was momentarily serving as a noose to keep him from jumping the gun, “I’m glad we’re related.”

Clearing his throat and feeling sheepish, Liam nodded. “Of the accident.” He felt guilty about the whole thing and knew that Rose felt the same. “Alby found us,” He gestured to his bruised eye. “And left after Rosie explained everything. He didn’t know who I was until that morning. We just got complacent with our relationship just being for us. If I could take it b-back.” He cleared his throat again when his voice cracked with emotion. “But yeah, he’s going to have a little brother or sister.” Mason’s question hung in the air. “If it’s something you want… I mean, technically they’re going to be your little brother or sister too.” Nodding, Liam listened to Mason trying to sort out his thoughts and feelings. “I think that’s a good idea.” He smiled. “We don’t need to rush anything, it’s all so new and there’s a lot going on.” At Mason’s comment about sleep, he couldn’t help but laugh out loud. “I can’t help but agree with you there. I’d kill to be able to sleep anywhere right now - not even my own bed.” He was just too worried to let himself sleep longer than a few minutes however and, even if he could, Rosie needed him. He smiled softly and placed his hand on Mason’s shoulder once more. “I’m glad too.” He told him sincerely before laughing. “Won’t Alby be surprised when he wakes up.” His mood was soured however to see Rose running towards them, crying her eyes out, and his stomach lurched. Jumping to his feet, he met her halfway, worried that she’d trip and fall just as badly as he was worried about Alby. “Alby? Is he…” He let his words hang in the air, too afraid to say the words. Noticing Mason appear beside him, Liam reached out to grip his arm, wanting to support both of them if the news was as bad as he feared. Instead, Rosie shook her head. “He’s awake. Oh, Liam, Mason. He’s awake and talking. He doesn’t remember the last few weeks but he’s awake.”

After years and years of wanting a sibling and now he had one and was going to have two. Mason knew that Liam was right, technically speaking, about the baby Rosie was carrying. There was a part of him that wanted to think about the baby like that but a part of him still wasn’t sure if he should yet. He would care, no matter how he ended up ultimately thinking but it was hard for him to be questioning what his place would be in the O’Riordan family--rather, the O’Riordan-Moran family--now. All in all, it felt strange to be so unsure and to feel drawn into a tangled web when his life had been mostly uncomplicated until now. But he was thankful Liam was understanding about them taking time to figure it out. It was a bit hypocritical of Mason to suggest it but hearing Liam express his own exhaust had Mason say, “I think Dorothy’s still around… she told me on the way over that her boss made her go home this morning but she rode back here from a friend’s wedding with me. I bet she could get a hold of one of those rollaway cots.” Between the two of them, Rosie and Evan’s mom, along with appearances from other relatives of Alby’s, they had already essentially camped out in the waiting area as it was, but Mason didn’t know what the protocol was for the hospital. It was nice that things seemed to lighten up for a short while. “He’s either going to shit bricks or he’s going to let us down with the most casual reaction ever.” Mason smiled, “And Mama Rose too--” but the reaction was cut short seeing Liam’s expression change. He turned around and saw the hysterics in Rose’s face; right away, Mason’s heart sank despite himself. He cut Liam a look for the question he started to ask but was thankful the worst wasn’t revealed to them. The turn of events made Mason feel like his legs turned to jello for a few seconds. He gripped at Liam’s shoulder for support but his other hand came Rosie’s back while he briefly bowed his head against her shoulder. “Thank God.” When he lifted his head, he let out a small sigh. “If im not remembering the last few weeks is the worst to come out of him being awake, I’m buying us all lotto tickets.” Mason shook his head at his own feeble half-joke. “This is good news...really good news.” His fingers were still holding the paternity test paper, which suddenly felt warm in the hand behind Rosie’s back. Was this going to change anything with their dynamic? His heart beat a little faster than before but he maintained his resolve as much as his sleep-deprived body would allow. “I guess it’s a day full of news though…” He glanced at Liam and then back to Rosie, “..since I had to find out from this bloke here that you’re going to be a mam again.” Casting her a tired smile after his lighthearted scolding, Mason let his hand drop from Liam’s shoulder to give Rosie a proper hug. “Congratulations, Mama Rose.”

Liam shook his head at his suggestion of finding a cot for him to sleep on and smiled. “I can’t sleep while Rosie’s so worked up. If anyone needs the rest it’s her.” He couldn’t help but chuckle at Mason’s hypothesis and nodded. “I wouldn’t put anything past Alby, to be honest. I can’t figure out how he’s going to react.” Honestly, he didn’t know his son well enough to guess how he’d react and before he could say so, his attention was taken by his fiancee For a moment, allowed himself to cling to Mason’s shoulder and Rosie for a second before pulling away. “That’s great, Rose.” He sighed, his shoulders relaxing slightly. The memory loss was one thing but it was easier to deal with. He couldn’t help the happy look that crossed his face when Mason brought up the baby and Rose’s face lit up for the first time since they’d arrived to the hospital. She let go of him and threw her arms around the man she considered her second son and hugged him tightly. “Thank ya a stór.” Rosie murmured reaching up on her tiptoes to place a warm kiss against his cheek. She knew what the two of them were being tested for, Liam had told her after the two of them had returned from donating blood but she didn’t want to pry. Mason would want to speak to his mother’s first before sharing the news with anyone else. Besides, part of her was worried about this changing things. “I’ll always love you, Mason Drew.” She smiled and patted his cheek. “No matter what.” Sniffling, Rose turned away for a moment. “Lord, this pregnancy has me all over the place.” She laughed, “Let’s go see my boy.”

[kristie-rp]

hold your breath

P R E V I O U S   -   |   -   N E X T

“Caramel,” Faust greets her with the stage name she hated; that she still hates. His voice is tinny on the line. She keeps this flip phone because he’s the only one with the number, and the terrible quality of it amuses her, in a petty way he need never know about. “You’ll want to come to the hospital.”

“Coincidentally,” she snipes back, “I’ve just decided I’m not going anywhere near the hospital. Fancy that.”

“Darcy was in a car crash.” He doesn’t beat around the bush, likely because he knows carelessness is going to annoy her more than deliberating.

Kara’s heart lunges into her throat, and she drops the case of ammunition she’d been placing on the shelf. Raspberry, checking out the new line of ladies weapons – pistols for the tiniest of purses! Only $375 – looks up in surprise. Kara’s dad had haemophilia, and she has it to a lesser degree, and she took Darcy for testing when she was born, and of course Darcy has it worse than her – all of this runs through Kara’s mind as she reaches to clutch the phone, instead of sandwiching it between her shoulder and ear. “What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything,” he says drily, “but you managed to have a daughter with the rarest blood type in Blacklight. They’re out of anything for transfusion. Of course, if your hatred for me is strong enough, you might just let her die...”

Fuck you, Kara thinks acidly, but refuses to say it aloud. “What room?”

She gets the distinct impression that Faust is smirking as he answers. It’s about the least surprising thing possible, and she hangs up.

If he doesn’t have any guards with him, I’m  going to punch him in the face, she decides. “You okay, Kar?” Raspberry asks. Kara looks up at her, staring for a long moment.

“I don’t have time, I need to go to the hospital. Something – something’s come up,” she explains, darting into the back room for her threadbare coat and purse. “Can you close up?”

“Uh, sure.” The criminal blinks at Kara, because she doesn’t ask for help, not for her own sake. This – this is unusual.

Kara doesn’t bother explaining, shouting a thanks as she bolts out the side door.

Kara’s knuckles are split and aching, broken against Faust’s face when she met him alone in a hallway. A passing nurse paused in alarm, and a hulking shadow seeps amusement as he stops the woman from interfering. The shadow says something – trust me, he deserves this and worse – and Kara spits in his face before grabbing the nurses arm. “Darcy St – Egrid. Darcy Egrid. I’m Kara St Claire; I have the same blood type, I’m compatible. I was told it’s an emergency.”

The nurse blinked at her, but led her into the correct room, and Kara’s hand goes to her mouth. She hasn’t seen her daughter in years, not in person, and it’s not a pretty picture. They’ve removed whatever has caused the injury to her, but she’s pale and lifeless on the bed. If Kara was the sort to leak tears, she’d be doing so right now, startled into them.

It’s hours later now, and Kara is still connected to Darcy. The doctor had decided on a direct person-to-person transfer, and it takes her a long minute to figure out why. Doctor Zavala is the same woman she came to eighteen, nineteen years ago now, for all the tests and the start of vaccinations for her newborn daughter. Kara doesn’t know if it’s coincidence or by design, and if so, then whose design – Faust, to mess with her, or Faust, to have a doctor who he doesn’t have to give extensive personal records to. Either way, Zavala offers her a sad smile, pats her arm after she sets the transfusion, and leaves her to it.

The thoughts are chasing each other around her head, and she knows she looks like a pretty picture right now. There’s a man she could charitably describe as a vampire lurking on the edge of the room, and she keeps almost asking him to sit before deciding not to. He obviously has some weapon on him, and his hands are still bloody. She thinks he’s nothing more than another one of Faust’s goons, except he watches her, when she looks up, with curiosity and suspicion in his gaze. Other than that, his face is impassive, and he never attempts to speak to her. It’s creepy.

Zavala and the nurse from before have come back, and they’re changing the bandage around the stitches they’ve worked into Darcy’s stomach. “The anaesthesia is wearing off,” Zavala murmurs, nodding to a nurse, who shakes her head. Apparently, they’ve already exceeded the maximum dosage for the day.

“S-stop,” a voice gasps, and Kara’s eyes widen as Darcy starts to move. She’s swatting at the doctors, trying to push them off. The shadow in the corner moves as if to come closer, but Kara moves first, taking Darcy’s hand with gentle fingers. It jostles the transfusion equipment, and the nurse tuts, but it serves the purpose, and the girl stills. “Wh – who are you?”

Kara is not a happy seeming woman at the best of times. More often than not, she comes across as angry or stand offish. Today, she looks sad more than anything else, a weight on her shoulders driving her to hunch over. She’s watching Darcy carefully, waiting for some sign of – anything. What Darcy wants, she expects. “Kara,” she breathes quietly. “Kara St Claire. You were hurt, you – needed blood. I’m a match.”

Something passes over Darcy’s face, and settles into frustration. “Is dad paying you to do this?”

The bitterness, that makes sense to Kara. Her expression twists into a sympathetic sneer. “I’d sooner swap places with you than accept money from that jackass again,” she snaps, terse. Darcy flnches, probably from the harsh tone, and Kara immediately hunches in on herself. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I don’t work for Faust. I got out.”

Scepticism. “He owns the city,” Darcy says. The fineprint is clear: no one gets out.

“He didn’t have anything to use to scare me into following anymore,” Kara explains. Darcy frowns. It’s clearly an invitation to elaborate. Kara, though – she hesitates. She knows Darcy has never been told that Candy isn’t her mother, that Faust started taking her as his kept woman around the same time.

The shadow breaks the silence. “You know how Candy isn’t your mother?”

Darcy’s gaze flickers from Kara to the corner, past the doctor quietly finishing up rebandaging. “Liez?”

“Only one person in Blacklight with compatible blood,” says the man. “And it’s her.” Kara has no idea what his accent is, something European, and she really, really isn’t inclined to trust him. But Darcy’s face shifts, and she frowns at Kara. Who squeezes her hand gently.

“My name is Kara St Claire,” she says, quietly. Zavala finishes whatever she’s doing and pats the nurse, coaxing her from the room to grant them some privacy. “Nineteen years ago, I was a whore working for Faust. I found out I was pregnant, and I decided I was going to keep the baby. I was alone before that, but this – this little girl? She felt like a fresh start. I doubt you can imagine it, you’ve never – or maybe you can, which might be worse, having been through what you have. Working the way I was, I didn’t think I could raise her the way I wanted, so I’d started this course on business management. Classes fit around work and the whole pregnancy experience, and then around raising her, with my neighbour helping out...

“Faust found out about the course, and he was annoyed more than mad. How dare I want to do something other than have sex in exchange for money? After all, I was just a stupid little whore. He broke into the apartment one night, him and some lackeys. It was my fault – I gave him the idea; I made the stupid mistake of telling him he was the father. Even if I hadn’t, obviously I cared for her, enough to want to be above him, and that was enough to keep me from breaking the way most of them do. So he decided he was going to do the last thing he could think of to hurt me. But – but he stole my daughter. He’s held it over my head ever since, sends me little updates but doesn’t let me anywhere near her. Gives himself credit for every accomplishment, usually months later at best.” Her laugh is hollow, she looks down to where she is still holding Darcy’s hand, running her thumb over the knuckles. “He’s a terrible man, and I’d bet he’s a worse father.”

Darcy stares at her for a long moment before she looks away, over to the shadow – the man called Liez. He shifts in the corner of Kara’s vision, but she doesn’t look up; let’s them have their moment, figure out whatever needs to be figured out.

“You’re my real mom,” she says at last, after a long silence. Kara swallows, looks up at her. Nods.

“I’ve missed you so much, Darcy.”

[carasueachterberg]

Health is sacred. We are all realizing this as we struggle together against a virus we can’t see.

I’m also realizing this as I care for our foster dogs this week. Siobhan is handling heartworm treatment beautifully so far, but I will not say she is out of the woods because I am still learning the hard way that we cannot take anything for granted when it comes to these amazing, yet fragile animals.

We lost one of our puppies on Sunday night. Ever since last Thursday, things have been tough in the puppy pen. Every litter we bring up from the shelters comes with mysteries hidden inside those beautiful faces. Mia quite definitely didn’t have any quality prenatal care. Abandoned because she was pregnant or abandoned and then becoming pregnant, I’ll never know. What I do know is that she is not in the best of health. She is bony and angular where she should be round and plump. Her ribs seem almost swollen, but I’m pretty sure it’s a body full of worms creating that illusion. She is always hungry and eats all day long, never getting her fill no matter how often I feed her.

She doesn’t have the huge swollen teats of every other mama dog I’ve fostered, it has never seemed as though the milk supply is enough. Add to that there are only 8 teats for ten puppies, so someone was always being short changed. Those were the factors I attributed for that fact for two weeks although the puppies grew steadily, they never became butterballs like most my litters.

It was Usnavi who first started to fade. His weight began going down instead of up and he seemed lethargic and confused. I began supplementing him with puppy formula. His weight held steady all weekend and he perked up, but he didn’t gain.

Meanwhile, Pippin began to follow his path, and then Elphaba, but neither of the girls took to the formula the way Usnavi did.

Even with the introduction of solid food, when I weighed everyone on Sunday, I discovered that seven out of ten had either not gained or lost a few ounces. I turned up the space heater in their room and tried to stay away as much as possible so that Mia would nurse. If I’m in the room, she jumps out of the box to visit me. Still the puppies seemed to deflate by the hour- wind up toys winding down.

On Sunday night, we lost Elphaba. I found her in the morning with Mia in her dog bed. She’d carried her there at some point in the night, maybe knowing she was passing, maybe trying to help.

On Monday morning it was clear that Pippin was also losing her battle. My best guess was that the worms were just too pervasive. I gave them a stronger wormer early Monday morning after I discovered Elphaba. That was a few days early, but at that point, the risk seemed to outweigh the benefit of waiting.

Tracy, OPH medical director, made an appointment for the pups at the vet and yesterday afternoon I gathered stool samples and put the pups together in a crate and headed to Hanover hoping it wasn’t too late for Pippin who had continued to refuse formula.

I was grateful that I was allowed to come in with the puppies. COVID-19 protocol meant that most owners waited in their car for a vet tech to come get their dog and then return it to them.

The vet spent nearly three hours with us – examining each pup, taking temps, weighing them, checking their blood-sugars and their red blood cell count. Blood sugar was fine and no sign of parvo, thank goodness, but worms were obvious in the loss of fat/muscle along the backbones and hips. In the harsh light of the examing room they looked even worse than in my puppy room. Four-week-old puppies should not be so docile and cooperative, nor so thin.

Their fecal test came back positive for hookworms – lots of them. Hookworms are awful worms that ‘hook’ themselves onto the intestinal wall and feed on the dog’s blood, causing the animal to become anemic and slowly die. In a puppy, that danger is much higher because of their fragile systems. As the worms progressed, the puppies regressed, being eaten alive from the inside out.

Red blood cell counts below 20 are cause for real concern, and anything 12 or under would normally require a blood transfusion. My pups were between 8 (Pippin) and 15 (Mr. Misto). They were too tiny for blood transfusions, never mind the astronomical expense. So, the doctor gave them each a shot of B12 and we talked about the harsh reality that the only way these pups make it is if we get them away from Mia. Otherwise we can’t break the cycle of reinfestation.

Our plan is to separate them from Mia, switch them to puppy mush (blended high quality puppy food and formula), follow an aggressive deworming schedule and give them iron supplements. Luckily, at four weeks, they are old enough (just barely) to be away from mom as long as I can convince them to eat mush.

So far, five of them seem fine with this plan – gobbling up mush, drinking water, and lapping formula. The other four require a little convincing. I have been able to get three of them to drink formula if I start them with a syringe feeding and then let them lap it out of my cupped palm.

Pippin has been the hold out. She will drink water happily – until her belly looks bloated. She refuses the formula and fights my syringe. I don’t want to inadvertently make things worse by causing her to aspirate from forcing the formula, so I have to be content with rubbing it on her gums so she will lick it off. Last night at 3am, she was finally hungry enough to drink from a bowl of formula. It was a great moment, shared only by the other puppies since the rest of the house was asleep.

This morning she tentatively tried the mush and again, drank from the bowl of formula. She doesn’t look much better physically, but hopefully her body is strong and with that nourishment and another deworming tomorrow, we can turn the tide.

Millie, Usnavi, and Cinderella remain skinny but are starting to warm to the idea of mush and formula. Millie seems strong but is resisting the most. I’m encouraged that she skips mealtime in favor of trying to wrestle with the others and have to assume she is one of the ones draining the bowl when I leave it in the pen.

It is touch and go here. Waiting and hoping that their red blood cells will regenerate, watching for more signs of life. My world has been reduced to the puppy room and Mia. Thankfully, Ian takes care of Siobhan and Nick is giving Fanny a lot of attention and allowing her to ‘help’ him work in his home office. Gracie, as always, deals with what is dealt. She’s got guard duty trooping in and out of the house to bark at any movement on our street or the neighbor’s yard.

I know we will get through this. It’s part of rescue. I won’t even say it’s my bad luck, because it’s the reality of rescuing dogs who need rescuing. Dogs that are thrown away by humans who did not care enough to spay them or deworm them or feed them properly. People who never appreciated the huge heart and happy soul of Mia. And communities that do not support or fund a shelter that can offer basic medical care, something as simple as a dewormer.

Once again I am reminded how simple the fix is for this. There is no reason this dog and her pups should be suffering so, no reason that Elphaba should have died. So much in this world is complicated and hard, but this one’s easy. It really is.

Be well,

Cara

If you’d like regular updates of all my foster dogs past and present, plus occasional dog care/training tips from OPH training, be sure to join the Facebook group, Another Good Dog.

For information on me, my writing, and books, visit CaraWrites.com. I have a new book, One Hundred Dogs and Counting: One  Woman, Ten Thousand Miles, and a Journey into the Heart of Shelters and Rescues, coming out in July. If it sounds like something you’d like to read, I’d be beyond grateful if you’d consider preordering it. Preorders contribute to the success of the book, not only giving me and my publisher some peace of mind but hopefully attracting media attention.

And if you’d like to know where all these dogs come from and how you can help solve the crisis of too many unwanted dogs in our shelters, visit WhoWillLetTheDogsOut.org.

Our family fosters through the all-breed rescue, Operation Paws for Homes, a network of foster homes in Virginia, Maryland, D.C., and south-central PA.

If you can’t get enough foster dog stories, check out my book: Another Good Dog: One Family and Fifty Foster Dogs . It’s available anywhere books are sold.

I love to hear from readers and dog-hearted people! Email me at carasueachterberg@gmail.com.

    Doing all we can with a deck that is stacked against us. #rescueisreal #thisisfixable Health is sacred. We are all realizing this as we struggle together against a virus we can’t see.

[thewalkingdeadfanfictions]

T, the Mute, Meets Daryl, the Stupid Redneck Chapter 8 - He’s a Military Boy

****Daryl’s POV****

           I was trying to go to sleep but for some reason my mind kept going back to T leaving with Rick, Shane, and Carl. Not only did I feel like that was the last time I’ll see her, Carol is crying over Sophia, and Andrea is loading clips. I get up and decide to go look for Sophia. I grab my crossbow and say “I need my clip now.” Andrea hands it to me so I load it and say “I’m gonna walk the road, look for the girl.” I look at Carol and nod before leaving. I had only walked a few steps when Andrea follows saying “I’m coming, too.” So I look at Dale and say “I’m going for a walk. Shine some light in the forest. If she’s out there, give her something to look at.” “Do you think that’s a good idea right now?” Dale asks but Andrea says “Dale.” And walks past me so he drops it.

****Glenn’s POV****

           T-Dog and I get out of the car and walk towards the farm house. Stopping at the steps I ask “So do we ring the bell? I mean, it looks like people live here.” “We’re past this kind of stuff, aren’t we? Having to be considerate.” T-Dog asks walking up the steps. “Did you close the gate up the road when you drove in?” the girl who came and got Lori asks. “Uh, hi. Yes, we closed it. Did the latch and everything.” She leans forward so I say “Hello. Nice to see you again. We met before briefly.” “Look, we came to help. There anything we can do?” T-Dog asks but groans. She looks at him so he says “It’s not a bite. I cut myself pretty bad though.” “We’ll have it looked at. I’ll tell them you’re here.” She says so I say “We have some painkillers and antibiotics. I already gave him some. If Carl needs any.” I say so she says “Come on inside. I’ll make you something to eat.”  Going into the house we follow her in and she leads us into a room saying “Your friends are in here.” Going in the room I expect to see Carl on the bed but it’s T, Carl is sitting next to her bed holding her hand and crying. Rick and Lori are next to him holding his other hand and an old guy is sitting on the bed with T. I take off my hat and say “Hey.” “Hey.” Rick says looking at us. “I thought…” I start trailing off so Carl looks at me and says crying “She did it for me. She saved me.” “Um, we’re here, okay?” I say not really knowing what else to say. “Thank you.” Lori says. “Whatever you need.” T-Dog says. Rick nods so we leave the room.

****Carl’s POV****

           T-Dog and Glenn had just left the room when Hershel rolls down the blanket covering T, her stomach is purple and bloated, and looks at mom and dad and says “They don’t get back soon, we’re gonna have a decision to make.” “And that is?” Dad asks. “Whether to operate on her without the respirator.” Hershel says. “You said that wouldn’t work.” Mom says so I grip T’s hand harder. “I know. It’s extremely unlikely. But we can’t wait much longer.” Hershel says and mom and dad get up and leave. “I don’t want her to die.” I tell Hershel. He looks at me and says “Neither do I, but she has to keep fighting. There’s nothing I can do if she stops.” I nod and pray that she doesn’t stop.

****Daryl’s POV****

           “You really think we’re gonna find Sophia?” Andrea asks as we walk through the woods so I shine my light on her face then say “You got that look on your face same as everybody else, ‘cept T. What the hell’s wrong with you people? We just started looking.” “T would look forever even if he thought he wouldn’t find her. That’s just how he is. But do you think we’re actually gonna find her?” she asks. “It ain’t the mountains of Tibet. It’s Georgia. She could be holed up in a farmhouse somewhere. People get lost and they survive. It happens all the time.” I say. “She’s only 12.” Andrea says mockingly so I say “Hell, I was younger than her and I got lost. Nine days in the woods eating berries, wiping my ass with poison oak.” “They found you?” she asks so I scoff and say “My old man was off on a bender with some waitress. Merle was doing another stint in juvie. Didn’t even know I was gone. I made my way back though. Went straight into the kitchen and made myself a sandwich. No worse for wear. Except my ass itched something awful.” She laughs and says “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that is a terrible story.” I chuckle as she laughs again and I say “Only difference is Sophia’s got people looking for her. I call that an advantage. And like you said T won’t stop looking for her till he finds her.” Suddenly she asks “When he left with Rick, Shane, and Carl did you get the feeling you wouldn’t see him again?” “Why?” I ask, I did but didn’t want her to know that. “I did and do. The way he was acting, it was like he was willing to give his own life if it meant that Sophia would be back. It’s almost like he doesn’t care about what happens to himself as long as everyone is okay.” She says so I say simply “He’ll be fine.” “You don’t know that. He literally almost blew himself up to get you guys out of the CDC.” She says causing me to counter “He’s ex-military he knew what he was doing.” “Exactly my point. He’s a military boy. Loyalty and protect that’s the only things going through his brain.” She says stopping and adding “It’s like he has nothing left in his heart to actually feel happy and cared for. You and Glenn come closest though, he trusts you and Glenn is like a brother to him.” I don’t say anything then and walk in silence thinking about T.

****Lori’s POV****

           I stand outside on the porch leaving the others inside as I wonder if it’ll be kinder to let T die now instead of being torn apart by walkers. When Rick comes outside I say “Maybe this isn’t a world for children anymore.” “Yeah well, we have children. Carl and T are here in this world now.” He says so I say quietly “Maybe they shouldn’t be. Maybe this is how it’s supposed to be.” “You can’t mean that.” He says. I just look at him so he says “Okay. All right. I can understand that thought crossing your mind.” “It didn’t cross my mind, Rick. I can’t stop thinking it. Why do we want them to live in this world? To have this life? So they can see more people torn apart in front of them? So that they can be hungry and scared for however long they have before they…So they can run and run and run and run and then even if they survive they end up-they end up just another animal who doesn’t know anything except survival? If she-if she dies tonight, it ends for her. Tell me why it would be better another way.” I tell him so he asks “What changed?” looking at me. “What?” I ask so he says “Jenner offered us a way out. You asked him to let us keep trying. You begged him. ‘For as long as we can,’ you said. What changed?” “There was a moment the other day-it was just a second but I forgot Jacqui was dead. I turned around, I wanted to tell her something. I almost said her name. It was just a second and then I remembered. But then I realized she didn’t have to see any of it. The highway, the herds, Sophia, Carl and T getting shot-She didn’t…She doesn’t have to be afraid anymore. Hungry. Angry. It hasn’t stopped happening, Rick. It’s like we live with a knife at our throats every second of every day. But Jacqui doesn’t. Not anymore. And then…I thought, ‘Maybe Jenner was right.’” Rick pauses in disbelief before saying “I don’t accept that. I can’t accept that. That man surrendered. It doesn’t matt-it doesn’t matter what he said. None of it. You really think it would be better if T…If we just gave up?” so I say “Tell me why it would be better the other way. Please.” He can’t tell me so I go back inside.

****Rick’s POV****

           Lori, Carl, and I are sitting in the hall when T starts coughing. We run into the room and she’s looking around wildly her eyes land on Carl so she says “Glad you’re okay. You remember the deer?” “Yeah!” Carl says approaching her. She smiles and says “Ask Daryl to teach you to track. Then you could see one again. He’s…” trailing off she looks at the ceiling. “T?” Carl asks. She doesn’t respond so Lori asked “What’s happening?” But T starts convulsing, I go to hold her down but Hershel says “Don’t. It’s a seizure. If you hold her down, you would hurt her.” Moving the pillow as Lori asks “You can’t stop it?” “She has to just go through it.” Hershel says so we step back. Lori and Carl start sobbing so I hug them. T stops convulsing a minute later so we jump to her side as Hershel says “Her brain isn’t getting enough blood. Her pressure is bottoming. She needs another transfusion.” Starting to get the stuff for a transfusion he calls for Beth. She comes running and is rolling up her sleeve saying “The only thing bad about being a universal donner is that you can only get blood from a universal donner.”

****Glenn’s POV****

           I was watching T-Dog get his arm stitched up as I couldn’t stand to see T like that, extremely pale and barely breathing she’s my best friend and like a sister to me. “You got here right in time. This couldn’t go untreated much longer. ‘Merle Dixon.’ Is that you friend with the antibiotics?” Patricia says so I say “No, ma’am. Merle’s no longer with us. Daryl gave us those, his brother.” “Not sure I’d call him a friend.” T-Dog says so she says “He is today. This doxycycline might have just saved your life. You know what Merle was taking it for?” “The clap. Um, venereal disease. That’s what Daryl said.” I say. “I’d say Merle Dixon’s clap was the best thing to ever happen to you.” Patricia says so T-Dog says “I’m really trying not to think about that.” As I go out on the porch and sit. I was thinking about how Daryl will react if T doesn’t make it and praying that she did when Maggie asks “Are you praying?” I sigh and ask “Why do you sneak up on people so much?” “You’re easy to sneak up on.” She says sitting on the railing. “I was praying. I was trying to.” I say. “You religious? You pray a lot?” She asks so I say “Actually this was my first try.” “Ever?” she asks. I nod and she says “Wow. Sorry. I didn’t mean to wreck your first time.” “God probably got the gist.” I say so she asks “Praying for what?” “My friends. Looks like they could all use a little help right now.” I sigh before adding “You think-you think God exists?” “I always took it on faith. Lately I’ve wondered. Everything that’s happened, there must have been a lot of praying going on. It seems quite a few went unanswered.” She says so I nod and say “Thanks. This is really helping.” “Sorry. Go ahead. Really.” She says so I look at her, look away, then look back and ask “You gonna watch?” She walks over and says “I’ll get you a refill instead.” She starts walking away but she stops and says “I know it’s not my business, and feel free to believe in God, but the thing is you’ve got to make it okay somehow no matter what happens.” She then goes back inside.

****Daryl’s POV****

           As we were walking something rustles so we head towards it. We come up on a camp site with a walker hanging from the tree. “What the hell?” I ask as Andrea is staring at it as it growls and tries to reach for us. Stepping closer to the tree I read the suicide note on it out loud “Got bit. Fever hit. World gone to shit. Might as well quit.” Stepping away from the tree I add “Dumbass didn’t know enough to shoot himself in the head. Turned himself into a big swinging piece of bait. And a mess.” She groans so I ask “You all right?” “Trying not to puke.” She says so I look at her then back at the walker and say “Go ahead if you gotta.” “No, I’m fine. Let’s just talk about something else for a minute. How’d you learn to shoot?” She says so I say “Gotta eat. That’s one thing these walkers and us have in common. I guess it’s the closest he’s been to food since he turned. Look at ‘em. Hanging up there like a big piñata. The other geeks came and ate all the flesh off his legs.” Causing her to vomit. I look at her as she says “I thought we were changing the subject.” So I say “Call that payback for laughing about my itchy ass.” “There wasn’t a lot that came up.” She says so I say “Huh.” And turn adding “Let’s head back.” “Aren’t you gonna…” She says trailing off so I look at her then it and say “No. He ain’t hurting nobody. Ain’t gonna waste an arrow either. He made his choice. Opted out. Let him hang.” But she walks towards it staring at it so I ask “You want to live now or not?” She looks at me so I add “It’s just a question.” “An answer for an arrow. Fair?” She says, I nod so she says “I don’t know if I want to live or if I have to or if it’s just a habit.” “Not much of an answer.” I say as I shoot the walker in the head and add “Waste of an arrow.” Before walking back without her but she soon catches up.

We walk in silent for a few steps before she asks “If it was T who asked would you say no?” I ignore her so she stops me and says “I’ve seen how you look at him. How you carried him like he would break back at the quarry when Amy died and how you steal glances at him.” “What are you getting at!?” I yell/ask her defensive before I could stop myself. “You wouldn’t hesitate if it was T asking.” She states so I glare at her and state “He wouldn’t need to ask. He’d do it himself.” “You like him. Don’t you?” She asks then. “I care about him.” I admit causing her to say “He does the same with you.” and slaps a hand over her mouth. “What?” I ask her in disbelief so she says “I shouldn’t tell you…but I will. He looks at you the same way you look at him. If you don’t believe me, the next time you see him kiss him. See what happens.” “I will not!” I state before turning to go but pause when she asks “T’s a girl?” “You can’t tell anyone!” I yell at her before I can stop myself again. “Oh god it all makes sense now.” She says causing me to look at her confused so she explains “T doesn’t talk to make it easier to hide the fact that she’s a she. She wears that stupid hat and hoodie as well to help hide it. I knew she was too pretty to be a boy but I figured it was ‘cause she was young.” She pauses then says “Glenn probably knows that’s why he treats her more like a sister than a brother. That’s why he wanted you two to share a room at the CDC and why he wanted T to ride with you. He was trying to get you to realize she was a she and your feelings for her.” “Is everyone trying to get us together?!” I ask/yell remembering the look Rick gave me back at the quarry. She laughs and says “I think so. I know I will now.” I turn and stalk back to the highway as she follows me laughing quietly.

****Rick’s POV****

           “Before it happened we were standing there in the woods and this deer just crossed right in front of us. I swear, it just planted itself there and looked Carl right in the eye. And I looked at Carl looking at that deer, and that deer looking right back at Carl. And that moment just-“I sigh before adding “Slipped away. It slipped away. That’s what she was talking about when she woke up. Not about what happened at the CDC. She talked about something beautiful, something living. There’s still a life for us, a place maybe like this. It isn’t all death out there. It can’t be. We just have to be strong enough after everything we’ve seen to still believe that. Why is it better for T to live even in this world? She talked about the deer, Lori. She talked about the deer.”

           Hershel then came in and checked T’s pulse. “She’s still losing blood faster than we can replace it. And with the swelling in her abdomen we can’t wait any longer or she’s just going to slip away. Now I need to know right now if you want me to do this, because I think she is out of time. You have to make a choice.” “A choice?” Lori asked so I say “A choice. You have to tell me what it is. You have to tell me what it is.” She puts her hand on my face and looks at Hershel and says “We do it.”

           Just as Hershel was about to do it a truck approaches. Patricia stays with T as we go see who it is. Shane gets out and asks “T?” “There’s still a chance.” I say as Hershel and Glenn take the bags from him. “Otis?” Hershel asks but Shane shakes his head and says “No.” We all are silent until Hershel says “We say nothing to Patricia. Not till after. I need her.” Then he and Glenn run into the house. I hug Shane and he says “They kept blocking us at every turn. We had nothing left. We were down to 10 rounds. Then he said-he said he’d cover me and that I should keep going. So that’s what I did. I just….I kept going. But I….I looked back and he….I tried.” “He wanted to make it right.” I tell him.

****Time skip****

           Lori, Shane, Carl, and I were outside waiting when Hershel comes out and says “She seems to have stabilized.” “Oh god.” I exclaim and hug Hershel as Lori says “I don’t have words.” “I don’t either. Wish I did. How do I tell Patricia about Otis?” Hershel says. I look at Carl and Lori and say “You two go to T. I’ll go with Hershel.” And follow Hershel inside.

****T’s POV****

           I wake up and squeeze the small hand in mine causing Carl to cry “T! You’re okay!” I chuckle so Lori asks “How you feeling?” “Tired.” I say too tired to write. “Then you need to rest.” Lori says. “T you’re awake?” Hershel asks surprised as he walks in the room. I look at him like he was stupid so he adds “Any pain? Fever? Nausea?” “I might have a fever but other than that I’m just tired.” I say slowly so he comes over and feels my forehead. “You have a slight fever, but it should go away in the morning if you rest. Your body is strong but it can only stay that way if you rest when you can.” He says wetting a towel and putting it on my forehead. I yawn and nod so Hershel ushers Carl and Lori out of the room. I stare at the ceiling and for some reason my thoughts drift to Daryl as I fall asleep.

           I follow the others towards camp as Daryl is yelling “Merle! Merle! Get your ugly ass out here! I got us some squirrel! Let’s stew ‘em up.” “Daryl, just slow up a bit I need to talk to you.” Shane says. He stops walking and asks “About what?” “About Merle. There was a-There was a problem in Atlanta.” Shane tells him walking in front of him so Daryl looks between him and Rick twice before asking “He dead?” “We’re not sure.” Shane says. Angry now Daryl yells “He either is or he ain’t!” Rick walks up to them and says “No easy way to say this, so I’ll just say it.” “Who are you?" Daryl asks/yells at him whipping around. Rick pauses before saying "Rick Grimes." "Rick Grimes, you got something you want to tell me?” Daryl asks him so Rick tells him “Your brother was a danger to us all, so I handcuffed him on a roof, hooked him to a piece of metal. He’s still there.” “Hold on. Let me process this. You’re saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof and you left him there?!” Daryl asks/yells and Rick being stupid just says “Yeah.” Daryl then throws the squirrels at Rick and go to punch him but Shane pushes Daryl down. He pulls out his knife and T-Dog yells “Watch the Knife!” He stands up and tries to stab Rick but I tackle him to the ground taking his knife, place it at his neck, and watch his face calmly a feeling I can’t identify, but shows up anytime I look at Daryl, stirring in my chest “You’d best let me go!” He yells I shake my head and Rick comes over and says “I’d like to have a calm discussion on this topic. Do you think we can manage that?” Daryl doesn’t reply so he asks again “Do you think we can manage that?” looking at me. I nod so Rick then says “Yeah.” So I scoot down to where I’m sitting in Daryl’s lap as he sits up, keeping him from getting up to kick Rick’s ass. “What I did was not on a whim. Your brother does not work and play well with others.” Rick says but then T-Dog says “It’s not Rick’s fault. I had the key. I dropped it.” “You couldn’t pick it up?” Daryl asked angry. “Well, I dropped it down a drain.” T-Dog says and Daryl relaxes a little so I get up and offers him a hand. “If that’s supposed to make me feel better it don’t.” he say getting up on his own and starts walking off but he stops when T-Dog says “Well, maybe this will. Look I chained the door to the roof so the geeks couldn’t get at him. With a padlock.” As I leave, walking over to the van, climb up it, and start fixing the arrows. I look up and see Daryl coming so I grab his knife, hop off the van, and hold it out to him handle first as I look forward not liking the comfortable feeling in my chest when I look at him. He takes it from me carefully as to not cut me so I brush past him and climb back up on the van as he walks away.

           There’s a flash and we’re at the CDC. He pushes me into his truck before getting on top of me as he shuts the door and the CDC explodes shaking the truck. We’re both breathing heavy as we look at each other after he props himself up. His arms on either side of my head and his legs in-between mine. He quickly gets up and moves over to the driver’s side as I sit up. My heart is racing so I shut my eyes for a second.

           I open them and I’m looking at a ceiling as Daryl asks “T?” I look at him and ask “Daryl?” as rough hands release mine. His posture and face changes for a second before returning to normal as he asks “You okay?” I nod and sit up stretching before looking around the room. Hershel is in the doorway and he says “T, you need to get more rest. You can get up in a few hours.” I glare at him so he says “Or you could get up now, reopen your wounds, and have Beth give you another transfusion.” stepping towards the bed. I then turn the glare towards my wound, take the bandage off, and start poking the spots. I sigh knowing Hershel’s right, it not being the first time I’ve been shot, and hold a hand out to him. He gives me a new bandage so I put it on and look at the door. Glenn is there so he asks “Is it still bad?” I shrug, lay back down, and pull the blanket over my head as I roll on my side, my back towards Daryl trying to forget the dream/memory.

[its-faustina]

Abortion is not God’s answer

You can relate to my views only if you are God fearing or you can even check whether you actually place Him first in your life.

Personally I believe that God knows what is best for us. Pregnancy either from rape or  outside marriage or within marriage does not change the status of an unborn child.

Maybe one thinks he/she lacks the financial support or may not be mentally prepared to take care of a child but don’t we have a God we call on in times of utter confusion and indecisiveness.How can we be exactly sure that the parents-to-be are incapable of handling children even when they have not born yet.If we completely place our trust in God to take care of His child, won’t He do what’s best for us.He never sends problems that are too complicated for us to handle.Such decisions like abortion can not be taken by our own strength on our own will because it could lead to a big mistake that could damage our lives completely.

If God clearly knows that someone is not ready to bring up children let it even be from couples who have waited all their lives to bring forth children to the world, it is always for the best. When conceived even by ‘ mistake ’ , God is the only person who will know whether you should or should not go ahead with the birth.If God clearly sees that you incapable of handle children , He will end the life of the child.We don’t need to intervene using contraceptive pills or under go any surgery for that matter.But if He knows that you enjoy life better with a child regardless of all the materialistic difficulties or mental preparation God will find a way to bring the child up to be well bred and taken care of even when we think the odds are not in our favour.

Camille’s story is one instance :

She was 23 years old, unmarried, and without a college degree. She couldn’t imagine how she could raise a child. The baby’s father had already morphed into her ex-boyfriend, Dan, and he had made it abundantly clear that he was not interested in marrying her. For some women, the stage would have been set for an abortion. But Camille took a different route.

Camille doesn’t regret giving her son life for one moment. Her point in sharing the hard times is to show that life’s hard times are okay because they are worth it. Sometimes things happen that are not planned, but you don’t kill the fruit of it; you make it work. That’s what Camille wants to emphasize the most:

“I made it work somehow. My life wasn’t over. It wasn’t ruined. It wasn’t what I had planned or expected. It was different. It was certainly more challenging. But I just kept making it work. Coincidentally, Dan will tell you that was a part of what initially attracted Dan back to me.”

Dan and Camille were married when baby Daniel was eight months old. Indeed, Dan had been impressed by how Camille chose to work hard and handle her life despite not planning for Daniel.

And news articles as such these show God’s unceasing love for his children:

Woman gives birth to quadruplets while fighting cancer

When Kayla Gaytan called her husband Sergeant Charles Gaytan to tell him that she was pregnant, neither one of the could have been more excited. Gaytan had just beaten Hodgkin’s Lymphoma and had endured five months of chemotherapy. It had only been a month since completing chemotherapy and doctors told her that the chances of having more children were slim.

On December 30 doctors safely delivered the couple’s four babies. Lillian, Victoria, Michael, and Charles were all healthy, with the smallest weighing just two pounds, eight ounces. They children will need to spend over a month in the neonatal intensive care unit.

“It was exciting. It was nerve-wracking,” said Kayla Gaytan. “But to see them when they all came out and to hear them crying, that was really exciting.”

In about a week, Kayla Gaytan will begin another round of chemotherapy. She has a 50/50 chance of surviving for five years.

“We know that (God has) got to have a different plan up there for us, and surely everything’s going to work out in the end,” Kayla Gaytan said.

Born at 23 weeks, Imogen and Annabelle are the smallest surviving twins in Scotland

At 23 weeks and four days, baby Annabelle was born weighing just 15.5 ounces. Ten minutes later, her twin, Imogen, was born weighing one pound and half an ounce. They were taken straight to intensive care while their mother underwent surgery. It would be six days before she held Imogen, and weeks before she was able to hold Annabelle.

The girls spent six weeks in incubators connected to positive pressure ventilators, and they faced more than their share of challenges. Annabelle had problems with her stomach and struggled to breathe, while Imogen had to undergo eye surgery.  They both needed multiple blood transfusions. Now, at almost 11 months, they are both home and doing well.

If you doubt that you can not trust the foster care agencies in your area or if you can not find parents who will take good care of your child, God will definitely intervene to make sure all necessary arrangements are done to protect the child from potential harm as long as we place our complete trust in the Lord.

This is how God took care of Ryan’s life…………

Pro-choice activists say I should have been aborted. Thank God I was adopted instead

Ryan says: “My biological mom proved that she was stronger than her circumstances by not choosing the violence of abortion. Once a foster child herself, she was faced with a decision that no one should ever have to make. No man should ever violate a woman like my biological “father” did to her.

Adoption unleashed purpose in my life. As a Christian, it is the essence of salvation; there is no salvation without it. I was a Boy Scout, record-setting athlete, honor roll student, National Honour Society member, musician, singer, writer, student leader, DJ, activist, designer, and a Who’s Who among American Colleges and Universities. I earned my Bachelor’s in Marketing and Master’s in Communications with a full-paid scholarship based upon my academic and extracurricular achievements. I became a small business entrepreneur, built a successful media production company, earned multiple awards for my broadcast design work, helped another adoptive family (now, part of my own family) reach millions of viewers on the former ABC Family and Oprah, and met the incredible woman (my wife, Bethany) who would love someone the world said would be “unwanted”.

I don’t detail these achievements to boast about me. All of the things that I’ve been able to be are because of a God who can make triumph rise from tragedy. Even if I weren’t able to achieve any of these things, I would have irreplaceable priceless value—like every other human being—simply because I exist.”

Did you know that Steve Jobs was adopted at Birth? God decided the birth of Steve Jobs to take place and found foster care for him as well. But what if his birth mom got in the way of God’s plan to abort Steve? We need to admit that we make big mistakes in our life and its only God who keeps us from falling apart. Through abortion we might be killing the very persons who bring solutions to many problems in our generation bring in innovative ideas to change the world and make it a better and safer place to live in.

God performs miracles in the life of every human being  even though his people fail to recognize His power specially the persons who think is the abortion is the only solution.It could be mistake for it a solution given by a human.We tend to make mistakes.But God will never recommend to abort children for we believe he is the author of life and death.He will never make mistake. Just as our existence is no mistake for God has given us a purpose.

He will never leave you as long as you remain faithful to Him.The ones who are quick to make decisions are the ones who doubt God and generally doubt the power of prayer.Prayer is crucial at times of confusion especially when you clearly know you are going against the fifth commandment: Do not slay the innocent and the righteous.

Frequent communion and confession, daily recitation of the Rosary and even asking the intercession of saints is a great idea.I recommend to pray and pray and pray for there will be an answer.And we can have a genuine smile on our faces for we know God is working on our problems and He has the best solutions.

Source for articles -  www.lifesitenews.com