#i agree wholeheartedly with the post this was on i just dont think thats the takeaway to make

[visualmemoryunit]

this is like. genuinely the worst take i have ever seen. like i do understand that some people who had bad experiences now take it out on others, but i think saying blanket "whoever had it bad in school is mean online now" is just not what to take away from people being mean online. i feel its more that a lot of people who would have been bullies in school were they not bullied now do it online.

[ganondoodle]

seeing posts about the damage that skyward sword did to the nuances of lore in zelda games (bc the whole thing with demise and hylia in canon really is the start of flattening the lore down to always be extremely black and white with no grey in between-)

and wholeheartedly agreeing but also thinking about how i have written the storyline in destiny and it putting a whole other context on it all and kinda wanting to know how other people think of seeing it that way when i just only got the first chapter done and its still just my cringy fanfiction and most people probably not being interested anyway (thats ok) and it not mattering anyway bc you can make up anything you want anyway so its got no impact on the lore anyway-

but also i cant help but feel like i need to defend demise in a way bc i KNOW his introduction did alot of damage to the lore but feel like its not really fair to pin it all on him as a character bc he also suffered from that one-note thing all games past skysw have, he also is a one note villain with no lore other than -is evil- and similarly dubious design decisions, but with even less characterization and even LESS screentime so naturally people dont like him or care about him at all bc after all he also negatively impacted the way more beloved villain (gan) and people not liking demise bc of everything is absolutely justified but i still feel sad about it bc he is my blorbo and somehow feel responsible for making him into an actual character with a background that isnt just -evil demon- and attempt to change how people feel about him but i would never butt in on someone elses post so i am wiritng it here instead

[vveakfish]

do you have any thoughts about the core four whose gender(s) are basically just a trans fruit cocktail that you would like to talk about? because I would love to listen

oh boy DO I !!!

I have So Many thoughts about them Anon, so thank you for giving me an excuse to try and put it into words beyond “Damn, these bitches trans! Good for them.”

Honestly, there are so many different ways to explore these characters genders based on how you choose to interpret their life experiences, and their aesthetic changes, and their relationships with each other. I am of the belief that any of them could be trans in any direction

But, that said, I Do have particular gender headcanons for YJ that i am very fond of, so thats what I’ll be talking about today.

(Small disclaimer. I have not finished all of the comics referenced in this. I am using the information i have to inform these, but you know, i might come back to this post at some point in the future and look at it like “wow, i don’t agree with any of this anymore.” And i think thats okay.

I’m just here to have fun, and i thoroughly enjoy these little guys, and think abt them alot, so enjoy

(also if you dont want to read 4.1k words of blorbo gender analysis, or would like to avoid spoilers for Superboy (1993), Young Justice (1998) & (2019), and Red Robin (2009) in varying degrees of detail, or you just want to see what lables i assigned them, scroll down to the bottom <3))

lets get started.

Bart:

Bart's gender is the most complex, but his thought process about it is also the most simple. I think his view of gender would be very much influenced by the fact that he grew up in VR in the future like…

A body is just an avatar, do what ever the fuck you want with it.

That said, the lil guy has always given me transmasc vibes. These vibes, however, are by no means binary.

He understands that in the 21st century a lot of people do not have his sort of “throw things at the wall and see what sticks” approach to gender, so he’s okay with being put in the box of Boy™. But his gender is a lot more * hand waves vaguely *

Clothes don’t have gender in his eyes, they’re fabric you put on your body. Wear what ever you want forever!

Bart in skirts is something i have seen many people draw/talk about before, and its something i agree with wholeheartedly. He likes hair clips, and like, those loud (actually loud and visually loud) beaded bracelet type things that ravers wear. He like nail polish. He doesn’t grow facial hair, but he wouldn’t care if he did. He’s not on hormones, but he definitely considered it for the bit. “Gotta drink my boy juice” Kind of vibes.

For him gender has Nothing to do with performance, its all about comfort. About wearing what feels right, regardless of whether or not he’s adhering to expectations of masculinity.

Yes, he Will wear that god awful outfit out of the house, haters can die mad

Cassie:

Anon, I need you to understand how much i love early yj98 cass. She is everything to me — her process of coming to terms with herself, and being able to watch her start to feel at home in her own skin. It makes me absolutely feral.

lets see if i can explain why… succinctly

When we first meet her in yj98, her identity as “Wonder Girl” is this sort of amalgamation of What it Means To Be A Hero in her eyes. She has her party city blunt bob wig (Because Diana is who she looks up to), the gloves, leather jacket, goggles combo (that so clearly take inspiration from Kon).

At this point in her life Wonder Girl is not really her. Its very clearly a mask she’s putting on. which is what makes it the perfect avenue for her to explore gender expression without it having to actually be about her gender.

I think the part that specifically makes me feral though is her… we’ll call it admiration of Kon.

The girl is a self proclaimed Superboy stan + theres all the weird not-drama between Cassie and Cissie over wanting attention from Kon. (And i say Not Drama bc its like… Kon flirting with cissie (which like… have you met 90’s Kon?? he flirts with everything that moves) and Cassie being upset that he’s Not flirting with her. and cissie is just along for the ride. She’s not quite as much of a flirt as kon is, but she has her moments)

All of this to say i feel like its impossible to have a conversation about Cassie’s gender without also talking about her experiences with comphet and lesbianism.

At the beginning, Cassie sees Kon — this cocksure, conventionally attractive boy with powers that (at first glance) seem very similar to hers, and felt something about it. And, in the way of teen girls who have been told since grade school that they’re supposed to like boys, Cassie comes to the conclusion that what she feels for Kon must be romantic in nature, right?.

All of this, the jealousy over Kon and Cissie flirting, basing her costume off Superboy’s (intentionally or otherwise), the fact that she wont let her team see her without the wig and goggles at all for so much of yj98. To me it all reads as the tangled mix of undiscovered lesbianism and gender dysphoria that the poor girl simply doesn’t have the words to define yet.

So, then what IS cassie’s deal with gender???

i am so very glad you asked.

She, too, is a transmasc of the nonbinary variety.

I think her relationship to femininity is complex, and ever changing. She doesn’t feel comfortable performing femininity the way the world expects her to, but she is also part Amazon. And i think having a relationship with both Diana and Donna would greatly influence how she felt about femininity as a whole.

The Amazons are strong, their femininity isn’t about beauty, or being soft spoken — it isn’t about Men at all. On Themyscira, to be a Woman is about bravery, honor, skill, and in some ways, divinity. Getting closer with her Amazonian sisters would change her relationship to womanhood immensely.

But it still wouldn’t feel Right. She would be able to see that womanhood can be defined differently, but that wouldn’t change the connotations that womanhood had as she was growing up. She’d never be able to lean into it the way Diana or Donna do — they both grew up only having woman defined as strong and brave and confident. Their experiences are not analogous.

The baggage of growing up a girl under the patriarchy wouldn’t just… vanish because she sees that it Doesn’t have to be that way. In some ways, the knowledge that it didn’t have to be that way could make her dysphoria all that stronger (especially if she hasn’t quite deciphered that dysphoria is what she’s feeling).

but i think there would be a point where two things sharpen into focus for her.

fiirstly she has a big fat crush on cissie king-jones.

and second (which would only come AFTER realizing her feelings for cissie) is that what she feels for Kon is Not the same as what she feels for Ciss.

She didn’t want to be with Kon romantically, she just wanted his gender.

I could see her experimenting with wearing a binder, liking that she can get rid of her boobs if she isn’t feeling them that day.

She already has her short hair, and her leather jacket and jeans, and shes big and buff and strong (because she deserves to be butch!!! okay???).

I still think she would use she/her pronouns, but she wouldn’t be picky ab it (if she gets called sir while at the pizza place, she’s not going to correct them.)

But here’s the kicker — I think leaning hard into her masculinity would be EXACTLY what she needs in order to actually ENJOY expressing femininity again.

When putting on the mask that is ‘womanhood’ becomes something that she can Choose to do, rather than something that is being forced on her, it can be pleasant. Like playing dress up.

She has a new appreciation for it, especially since her friends respect her gender, and she knows at the end of the day, when she takes the makeup, the clothes, and the wig off, underneath it all she’s just her.

(Small addendum re: TT’03 Cassie’s fem phase. I have Many thoughts about this as well, and while they end up in roughly the same place, i exploring her experience with comphet and her decision to dress in a more traditionally feminine in that run is something id like to explore in another post (once i’ve actually read the run too.)

Cissie (bonus):

This one should be shorter than Cassies, mainly because my reasoning for it is much simpler.

YJ'98 (#11)

She lists all these names, all of them feminine except for Fucking Ralph. “One weird phase” she calls it.

To me, Cissie is a transgirl through and through. She has this huge list of femme names she tried on while she tried to find the one that fit best. She mentions ralph in this off handed way, as if its not important, and i think thats just her way of dismissing her deadname as something of little consequence.

(that said, i think there’s lots of fun to be had with transmasc cissie, or tried transing-her-gender and realized it wasn’t for her Cissie. But as a transfemme, tgirl cissie is So important to me <3)

Kon:

other people on here have made posts about Kon’s gender that are much more coherent than this will be, but i’m putting the words down anyway. bear with me.

Kon’s experience with identity (especially in his earlier years) is almost entirely about the external rather than the internal.

Kon has his whole life planned out for him from the moment he opens his eyes. It’s simple really — become Superman.

So you have this freshly hatched teenage boy, saving the world as Superman (not the Only one, but definitely the coolest one (Kon would argue)). All eyes on him, all the time. In some ways, performance is inseparable from who he is. From the very beginning, everything he does is on display.

He starts his life with a Name (Superman), a life path (…again, Superman), and all the confidence of a sixteen year old jock with nothing but wins under his belt. then it all gets taken away.

Turns out Clark ISNT dead, and the world doesn’t need its pint sized superman anymore now that its got the real thing.

enter Superboy

Kon’s entire identity, his whole purpose for being alive, was to step into the shoes of a dead man who is no longer dead. So where does that leave our genetically engineered test tube baby?

lost, and extremely confused.

But he’s good at using his charisma as a shield, and even better at keeping himself busy. His problems aren’t there if he doesn’t have the time to think about them, right?

and i think that’s true about his gender as well.

Similar to Cassie, his discovery and exploration of his gender feels incredibly tied to his sexuality (to me). If you’ve read sb93, you know Kon’s deal with women. He is cute & conventionally attractive & he's like superman with a fashion sense, so of course there are people fawning over him.

And he loves the attention. He likes that people want him, or that they are looking at him. The issue is he doesn’t have the life experience to realize that their reasons for paying attention to him are often very shallow, manipulative, or selfish.

He isn’t treated as a person very often. He’s a brand, a product, a tool, a weapon. He’s arm candy, he’s a photo op, he’s a headline, he’s a paycheck. And it takes him a long time to be able to tell the difference between someone Liking Him & someone Using Him.

For the longest Time, Superboy is all he is. He doesn’t have a name outside of that identity (except for the various pet names the women in his life give him (kid & pup, mainly)).

And even when Clark does give him his real name, Kon-El, its still Attatched to his identity as Superboy.

I dont think that he would really even be able to start dissecting how HE feels about his identity until he’s much older.

Part of this would come from the space to be someone else that gaining a civilian identity would give him. As Superboy, the goal has always been to stand out, to be seen, to shine like the sun.

As Conner Kent, he has to blend in. He doesnt want to draw attention to himself, or the Kents, or Clark. He has to fit in, which was never something he had to do as Kon. And i think it would kind of chafe at him — but he wouldn’t really know why.

I think he’d chalk it up to how different of an experience it is. Not being loud, having to be normal™. And so i think he’d just… continue to play the part. For a while anyway.

And like, part of being Normalest Boy Conner Kent would also involve actively un-queer coding himself for the sake of fitting into the ecosystem of Smallville High. and its like…

Young Justice, as a friend group, is SOOO queerplatonic. The lines between romantic and platonic intimacy are so blurred, and Prior to Kon’s YJ days he he was also like… living with these woman who he had complicated relationships with that also blurred the lines between platonic, romantic, and sexual (…looking at you, Knockout).

So learning where the line is when it comes to how he can acceptably interact with his civilian friends (particularly the boys) would Really open his eyes to just how close he is with Bart and Tim, and how similar his feelings for them are to his feelings for… lets say, Simon Valentine.

But i dont think That is what would actually tip the scale. I think realizing that these feelings for his friends aren’t considered ‘normal’ would make him shove them down deeper. As ‘Conner’ anyway.

from here it could go two ways, right?

Either we get Teen Titans ‘03 t-shirt Kon, who sheds his GNC 90s swag in exchange for adhering closer to traditional (read; boring) masculine gender roles.

or we get a Kon who leans Harder into his punk roots, but its a conscious choice now.

(this isn’t even digging into how he would feel once Jon comes into the picture, because while Kon cares for that boy Deeply, his feelings abt the new kiddo in the family could also be very complicated. But that’s a post for another time.)

Personally i prefer the second one.

Kon has always been a curious kid, i love the way he makes pop culture references, and how he bases his behavior off of 90’s teen tropes that he Most Definitely learned from TV. In his early days this wasn’t done in a research way necessarily, but he Did want to learn what it was like to Be a Teen™, and TV was the easiest way to figure that out.

(and, playing in the space of Kon adaptations, his love of media/pop culture, and just over all thirst for knowledge, are present both in the Reign of the Supermen Movie, and in his iteration during the n52 (which is one of the few things i personally have internalized from reading n52 Superboy/Teen Titans)).

But post gay awakening, i feel liked he’d be interested not just in behaviors, but also the context of them. Digging into punk as a subculture rather than as an aesthetic. Learning about its connections to queerness, and community, and self expression. And i think this would be extremely freeing for him. (especially if this were around the time of Jon becoming Superboy v.3, but again, not the point of this post.)

this all culminates in Kon being like yk? gender just… isnt for me. Like, it takes im a long time to get to this point, but realizing that the path that was set out for him is just one of the potential paths he can take, and while he might not know where this new path will take him, its his, that that matters.

And also like, Because his friends are who they are, he’s seen different versions of queerness, and transness, but i think it would take him a bit to see himself as someone who Isn’t Cis bc like… he doesnt have dysphoria in the traditional sense.

He’s still the beefcake he’s always been, but i think he’d start playing with makeup when he realizes it makes him feel good (he shows up the the cave one day with smudgy eye liner and Cissie is immediately like a) you look so good and b) can i Please do your makeup? (and then she does it, and he looks so pretty, and he gets these weird giddy feelings that he doesn’t realize is gender euphoria until his friends start talking abt gender euphoria)

His uniform starts to get more personalized too, like the designs where he has knee patches, and all his little belts, and stuff. maybe he starts experimenting with showing skin. bc he deserves it

(’its for maximum sun exposure!!!’ is the what he tells clark… he’s not sure if clark bought it or not)

And hey, exploring gender presentation more as Superboy might help him do the same as Conner. Cassie will take him thrifting, he’ll try of a flowy skirt or a sun dress or something and then its Over. Gender euphoria part two, electric boogagloo.

In the end, its about realizing that adhering gender roles (and truthfully, any socially imposed ‘rule’ about self expression) is something he can simply Choose not to do. And i think this freedom would be something that benefits him in his civilian life as well.

His gender is: literally what ever, man.

Tim:

Ok, here’s the thing about Tim and gender, right? I think he’s kind of just comfortable as he is. He’s good at playing the roles he needs to in what ever situation hes thrown into. ‘Robin’ and ‘Tim Drake’ (and even ‘Tim Drake-Wayne’ if you want to split hairs) might be masks he wears, but that doesn’t mean they’re any less him. if that makes sense. like…

Lets look at the differences between Bruce (or Brucie) and Batman for a second. They really are different people. Batman is who bruce is at his core, ‘bruce’ is this sort of liminal space between the cowl and his public persona, and then theres Brucie™, and well, you know how he is. These are personas that Bruce puts on.

With Tim its like he just highlights different aspects of himself when a situation requires it. (oh no, the autistic!Tim head canons are being loud today.) But like, he’s Always been masking. And i think this is something he would look at as like… getting a good grade in adapting. or something. He’s comfortable, all the roles he plays are ones he’s familiar with, and he doesn’t really question who he is outside of who he needs to be.

That is, until Caroline Hill makes an appearance.

I feel that the decision to go undercover as a woman was a wholly practical decision in the moment. It’s what the mission required, and therefore tim stepped up. Its just another mask, right? Surely this wont awaken anything in him…right?

But this is an entirely new mask. And i think it might like… shift the way he looks at/thinks about the other masks he puts on. He was able to step into a role that was very foreign to him, and it Worked. (and he felt pretty, which like… woah, thats a new feeling. and he kinda liked it? file that under ‘thoughts he doesn’t have the bandwidth to process right now.’ Bruce needs him back at the cave! its time to debreif! and he has a biology test tmrw! no time for gender scaries!!!).

I think it would take a while for him to be able to admit it to himself though. Because like… hes Not uncomfortable with his body, but he also keeps thinking about how good he felt dressed up femininely, and how he felt powerful, in a way. That putting on that mask felt just as good as putting on his domino.

Personally, i think itd be funny if instead of coming out right away, Tim doing undercover missions essentially in drag becomes a recurring thing. And i imagine some people give him a hard time. (not in a transphobic way or anything, i just mean like, teasing him fondly or what ever.) (Also, i like to imagine that when cissie Did kons makeup, bart and Tim jumped in there too bc like hey why not, and hoooooo boy, if Tims egg hadn’t cracked before then, it sure would have cracked after.)

The thing about him is, i’m not sure if he’d come to the realization himself. You know, that he would like to present femme sometimes, in a situation that has Nothing to do with a mission.

I could see Tim convincing himself that its a pointless or frivolous desire, which is Why he relegates his time presenting femme to when he can prove that it’s useful.

but i have this image in my mind, right? Of him, taking his makeup and wig off, and hes chatting with whoever is in the room with him (literally anyone else mentioned above… or Dick). And Tim’s just talking about how he wishes he could present this way in situations other than missions.

and the other person in the room is just like… i mean, you literally can.

and hes just like…. shit you’re right. i Can :0

I could probably go further into depth abt this, but i think this just frees him to start playing with gender more as Tim. and start to recognize when he’s feeling more masculine, more feminine, or somewhere in between.

His gender isn’t consistent, its this thing he’s constantly listening to, and trying to understand. but in the mean time, he can paint his face, and wear pretty clothes, or dress like just Some Guy, or be a hedgehog dressed in traffic light colors, or what ever his heart desires.

As far as like… how He describes his gender, i think he’d say something corny like bi^2 (bi of both the sexual and the gendered varieties). Or shrug, handwave, generally give a non-helpful vague description. Or tell who evers asking to buzz off.

(small addendum wrt Kon and Cassie in TT’03. I haven’t read this run yet, so i didn’t really include it in this post. But i Do have thoughts about what might cause the two of them (my gnc besties from my comics books) to lean sooooo hard into traditional gender roles after being So Queercoded in their other appearences. Before i talk abt that though, i want to read the comic. So, that will have to be a post for another time)

ANYWAY, heres that TL;DR i promised.

Bart: NB Transmasc Cassie: NB Lesbian (of the transmasc variety) Kon: Agender Tim: Fluid (bi-gender) + Cissie: Transgirl

Thank you soooooo much for giving me the opporrtunity to ramble abt the silles and how Not Cis i think they are. Love you forever.

[raisinchallah]

you know the post that had me the most oh my god maybe im not autistic this is insane was this video where this guy was like acting out a fake dialogue with a neurotypical person who was annoyed that he was overexplaining things and hes like well ur not doing it right and like saying just full stop its the neurotypical persons fault for being annoyed at being told how to do stuff because they were unenlightened to the correct way and like seemingly not able to understand this would annoy someone and everyone in the comments was wholeheartedly agreeing wishing everyone was super normal about being told how to do stuff which is so wild to me cuz i get like the overexplaining thing and i know it often is not like malice or critique but literally how are u not driven up a wall because its like immovable object vs immovable object like this conflict would be worse with two autistic people tbh this isnt a neurotypical thing no force on earth greater than an autistic person and their specific routine like dont tell me this is wrong dont tell me what to do explodes u with eye lasers like akfkakkf im very familiar with this type of conflict my last job i had a coworker literally nicest dude in the world but was soooo particular about how stuff was done like more stringent than our managers telling me to only shake the noodles dry with a specific hand grip type stuff and again he meant zero malice and was just trying to help me and train me but i literally felt like i was clawing the fucking walls like um dont break my routine and like again i get the impulse i do i was like mentally feeling like noo how could u be doing it wrong (different from me) when working with my less experienced coworker and like i get the insane micromanager thing lol my autistic dad also hates being told what to do but will try to offer wayyy too much help and advice and corrections to the point u cant do it urself and i think i was just like so fascinated and appalled that like i fully get people being like of course my overexplaining is just helpful and kind cuz thats how its taken but having zero idea of the reverse of being on the other end of someone telling u how to do stuff but theyre wrong about it or simply different being literally the worst thing in the entire world the systems the rules the order comes crashing down and somehow instead everyones like yeah neurotypicals just gotta get it together and listen to our advice and im like no actually wheres the rights for people who are particular freaks to a degree they cant stand being told what to do in a different manner like how do u not suffer with this all the time if u have such strong opinions

[evansbby]

OH MY GOD MENS ICKSSS- like there are few for me but when i get them its like an allergic reaction!

- when they do those internet dances FUCK ICK!! like the Dab or something fuck. (Except for that one video where benedict cucumber did it cyz that... that confused me. that made me produce an egg. NEXT.)

-slippers... idfk... sandals. mens toes are ew. with the fucking long hair on their toes and theyre so UNAPOLOGETIC about how thick and fat their toes are fucking GAG.

- when they flip their coat/shirt collars up (except for benedict as sherlock??? shit. AGAIN IDK WHY i might have to look into this and self refect.)

- when they have those super unfunny group chats with their friends where they talk as if theyre all geniuses ahead of the game wtf why do all men have those group chats??? and its never funny??? but they think it is??? everytime i catch a glimpse of it im like bitch the fuck 😭 im funnier than that surely. and they sound so fucking dumb everytime but PROUD. ick vicky wicky.

- when they cant deal with standing in lines. its like theyre too cool for it. bro no, you don't clean ur nails, stand in line like a normal human being and accept the shame u weirdly associate with being patient.

- when men barely talk to their children during family outings... thats just asking for me to commit a hate crime. not even an ick.

- cartoon shirts... anime shirts... quote shirts... id rather they wear banana patterns t shirts or something like... ITS FINE WHEN IM UNINTERESTED IN THE DUDE but like after fhat i cant help but look at it and wonder... "doth he hentai?" and then "is thee childish???" and then it makes me hate myself because im judging them way to hard and its double damage. coz im ick with him and ick with myself 😔

- SMOKING which is less icky then FUCKING VAPING WHAT. Both gives me loser vibes fucking pupping in a desolate corner every hour, begging for a light maybe. standing around awkwardly with people and delighting in your addiction. the whole thing is super mega ducky ick. Like WHY??? (the only exception is tommy shelby and sherlock- SPECIFICALLY the fictional characters. I saw benedict on the streets once and phsically cringed and crossed the street i wish i was joking thats how bad my ick was.)

- Long hair. no no i know some guys apparently look hot in it but i dont SEE it and i REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT. i had to INVESTIGATE for years why people found harry styles hot and had to cover the sides of his head with my hands to see him in short hair to understand he had potential. not. one. guy. with long hair looks hot. nope. even daemon i was like hUh? until he showed up in that one ep with short hair and i was like 🤤 Papa? Be my uncle ❤️ then his L'Oreal hair came back and he looked like a 🐴

- guys who try to be fashionable but they just look so shit. with the fuckin berets and big leather pants and vests and gun harneses 🙂‍↕️ my guy u look like what invented delete. like some dudes can do the shit out of and it just works but my guy... a clean shirt and some black trousers...

- guy sending sexy selfies... like who r u pouting for my dude 😭 just smile please 🤌✨

idk if these are icks but i felt these to my soul 🥹 im sorry its long i just had to get it off my chest HAHAH

luv u xoxo

-🐝🖖

oh wow bestie this is some list!!!

if by internet dances you mean like the tiktok dances then yes i wholeheartedly agree.. my man should ONLY have a tiktok for watching purposes. if he posts a thirst trap or him dancing to some trending song then that's it, he's not my man anymore lmfaoo. like that's so CRINGE tiktok dances are for the girlies!!! my man needs to have minimal social media presence hehe.

i kinda agree with the sandals one but i don't mind when men wear sliders sometimes in a casual way haha.

boys group chats are the worst most misogynistic cesspools of debauchery ever like truly boys are SO LAME when with their dumb friends so agree with that one.

i've never met a man who can't deal with standing in lines lol but tbh I HAVE ZERO PATIENCE therefore i myself hate standing in lines lmfaooo so my man would have to be the opposite of me. although i understand this one so this isn't an ick for me.

[tame-a-messenger]

I wholeheartedly agree with you and other anon, I love Shayne and he’s been my top 3 for as long as I can remember but he hosts too many freaking shows. Anon only mentioned Reddit and the guessing but we also have who meme’d it, beopardy, and challenge pit technically bc he was in most of them. I know he’s pretty much the money maker of Smosh and everyone enjoys him but I miss back in the day where almost everyone had a show on pit they can enjoy. But honestly I think the reason he’s pretty much the only host is because it seems he’s one of the only people full time. So I feel like thats the smartest decision money and views wise. Idk I just miss when they actively tried out new shows, I know that those don’t really pay their bills but it would be nice bc it’s something new and refreshing. I think I’m just ranting at this point, I just NEED my babies to come back 😕

I totally didn't count those! I was mainly talking about "one person" videos where it's only Shayne + 1 or 2 other people, but yeah, no you're right he does HOST a LOT of shows.

I miss back when everyone had a 'show' too. "Seriously Super Stupid Sleepover" was my FAVORITE thing they did back in that time! (it might have been the only thing I watched at some points)

"I just miss when they actively tried out new shows"

Me too! They've been trying that out recently (kind of) and it's been some fun? It kind of seems like they don't want to spend too much money on newer content. Which I understand, but some of my FAVORITE videos are the low budget ones! like the squad vlogs!!! I LOVE THOSE. We don't want big impressive sets, we want the cast having a good time with a good premise!!! (I genuinely have no clue why they haven't tried more different stuff out. The only thing I can think of is they don't want a video to bomb and lose out on guaranteed money, but they aren't getting anywhere as they are rn. Risk = Reward gamble)

I am really starting to think they don't really know what they want to do on the channels because of how they are acting as of recent. They keep trying out stuff between things they know get views, (Sniper Chess - Reddit Stories) and I'm not saying I think they're shitting the bed or going bankrupt rn, just that they seem nervous?

OR y'know, they could just be planning big things for the future so that's why we've been getting these "low effort" videos.

Some of the best times I had watching Smosh was when they were doing different stuff on most uploads. They can keep the Reddit Stories and all their staple shows, but give me VARIETY. Like REAL variety. Don't force feed me content that doesn't even get you views, focus on building your fanbase! LOOK AT HOW MUCH MONEY THEY RAISED JUST DOING NOT EVEN AN HOUR AND A HALF LIVESTREAM???

21k IN 1hr 20mins ???? that's $262.5 dollars A MINUTE .....

THEY DONT REALISE HOW MUCH THEY SQUANDER THE FANS THEY DO HAVE.

do. better.

So sorry this ended in a rant, I just am very passionate about this subject! I WANT them to do well! I see all the ways they could have more and they just shit themselves and flounder, then act like they couldn't do anything, it's INFURIATING! They have a large fan base that loves them, that would be willing to help crowd fund most anything cool (summer games anyone?? I'm 100% certain that if they did a fundraiser for that we could get them AT LEAST 50k to spend on it) and they don't. do. anything.

Maybe I am just fully unaware about what goes on, and if I am lmk, but it really just feels like incompetence from the 'suits' at Smosh

Sorry this turned into a rant Anon :D I also have been in need of my cuties (IM GOING CRAZYYYY as you probably can tell from this post lmao)

[codeform]

I just saw your posts about gender for that Clu person, and based on their responses, I think this is someone who is dealing with a lot of uncertainty and they were hoping for a certain answer for their question. Maybe not a permanent one, but a springboard or starting point. They are probably looking for a starting point that's a little more specific than 'whatever u want' because I think they might've said (or suggested) they aren't sure what they want.

Your answers are correct, of course, but speaking from personal experience on other topics, it can be frustrating asking for a simple yet specific answer (in this case, that would be an answer like 'cis male' or 'transfem') and getting only broad generalities. Might I suggest supplying them with some terms that seem to be a pretty close fit to what they described? You wouldn't be labeling them, you'd just be giving them some things to Google so they can see if it fits them. A place to start their gender identity journey from (because some people do feel more secure when they have that 'label' and this person might be one of those. And that's completely okay if they need that.)

Hope this helps you and them!

i Absolutely agree w u anon! but (and i am speaking as sm1 whose early exploration was almost entirely based off of discussions w highschool friends— all 2nd hand information. which is its own can of worms hsdfjkjs) i do think its important to like. do that initial footwork yourself?

bc (n im glad u agree!) there is just no neat answer!! esp not w nonbinary genders!! I (a man who has a very weird gender itself) am still constantly learning!! and i did edit one of my rbs but idk if Hal saw, but i think a very good place to start is less "what is upsetting me abt my gender" but rather "what is making me happy" — this is just generally a less painful jumping-off point too, bc its usually easier to work through when you're confused (its a lot to unpack upset/pain/confusion at the SAME TIME!!! not fun)

i will stick by honestly wikipedia as a genuinely useful surface level resource. install shinigami eyes so u dont wind up on transphobic sites and it has a solid rundown of both your "basic" terms and the history of the community, especially bc it is very hard if impossible to get an answer when youre asking sm1 else "heres what i feel now what am i." skhsdhf

and no hate!!! genuinely!!! thats a very easy place to wind up in, where u just WANT a clear-cut answer from sm1 else, but like i said b4: nobody knows you better than YOU!! i think theres like. this idea that we all just Knew and the truth is no, i promise we did not. we have all googled "nonbinary definition" "demigender definition" "neopronouns definition" i went thru 2 whole entire genders b4 i settled on Man and MORE AFTER THAT before settling on Man But Weird

AND ALSO. i am open to questions!!!!!!! but i am A WEIRD DUDE W AUTISM AND I AM NOT BUILT FOR MAKING SENSE!!!!! i promise i AM trying!!! and will continue to try!!! but it is abt to be June and pride is this month and wholeheartedly go to your local pride events if you are confused!!!!!! take to queer ppl who are both prepared to answer questions AND can provide much more relevant, local(!!!) resources — and talk to queer elders!!!! meet the coolest people in the world forever!!!!

but yea to circle back 2 th point i was like. Trying to make. doing that initial footwork yrself is the easiest i think bc you know you. i promise even tho it seems daunting it WILL ultimately be less confusing than trying 2 play 2nd hand telephone even if yr playing w friends (like i did. not ideal — wasnt safe for me to research myself but still Not Ideal)

[dodi-li]

i have neither patience nor desire to get into a fight over this but I’ve thought about it too much to leave this be, my apologies for the disturbance.

positivity first, I agree wholeheartedly with the actual point of the post; its a very unsightly thing to let the whole world bear witness to Medrano living in one’s head rent free, and more often than not it takes the form of a very discourse-oriented “virtue signaling”, if you’ll forgive the vulgar word for lack of others. Its a negativity of a particularly nasty sort, and inspires an affliction of mind comparable to waking up with a hangover. I fear I am one of these people.

I have never posted about it, nor spoken openly of it to more then two close friends, but naturally in my likely very compromised opinion, theres nuances to it. on a personal level, i dont really gaf whether or not im wasting my time, what ive come up with is a form of art in its own right, which is all the justification i need to be satisfied. but thats not to say there aren’t other beneficial consequences. for instance, when we as discoursers talk about racism, or religion, or revolution, its more often than not in strictly theoretical terms. as a result, ive found, the then proposed solutions to these things take on an air of armchair isolation, being in the same theoretical terms as were used to frame the problem itself.

but that isnt how it works. these things arent just matters of hypothetical relationships between theoretical factors as part of a thought experiment, they are real physical phenomenon, with material, comprehensible causes and effects. they are, as in this case is Hazbin Hotel, cases that can be studied. turning away completely is certainly easier, and as stated above the other option is rarely much fun, and it is certainly the best way to protect one’s peace. but like it or not you cant be escapist all of the time, youve gotta threaten the bubble now and again. that doesnt mean you have to watch and write commentary on a pair of eight-hour brandon rodgers sketches, but again, that is the case being discussed. well less discussed, moreso shouted by me unprompted from the peanut gallery, but im not done talking.

a concrete example of what i’m talking about is the fact that, in my journey as a writer, this endeavor of mine has represented a monumental milestone in the development of my sense of subtlety and poetry. I shall not bore you with specific details, but it consists of a re-write of the story written with one primary design principle— use everything. every character, every concept, failed or successful must be included. large shifts are obviously allowed, but they must flow naturally out of only the material we currently have. in short, the question i aimed to answer was, what would it take to make this story good? cliché i imagine, i dont talk to very many people about this. obviously, as a creative endeavor, weirdo behavior. im aware. how do you think i feel. but as an exercise, a more heavily structured project in which the main skill being used is problem solving, its just as obviously an extremely rewarding experience.

and outside artistic growth, theres the other obvious consequence of me having to take its dogshit depiction of bigotry and abuse and somehow turn it into something interesting. Again, sparing detail, but in my view, and in the judgement of the two people who know about it, i cooked! more than that, it allowed my personal philosophy around these things to solidify in my mind, and be it real or a trick of bias, i feel smarter for it.

but once again, theres the elephant taking up half the room, the fact that i am in no way of sound mind, and my putting six years on-and-off into this with absolute earnesty is more than a little offputting. hence the readmore up there. sorry. also fuck vivziepop or w e

I hate Hazbin Hotel as much as the next person but every time I've encountered someone who dedicates a whole blog to how much they hate Hazbin, writing posts about how they would have written the plot much better, making redesigns of the characters, etc etc it just feels as insufferable as actual Hazbin fans. You're just as obsessed as the fans, why are you giving it so much of your time.

[alstroemerian-dragon]

Bruh tumblr didn't even tell me you responded, I 1000% agree with you on fuyus view of kids cus like he’s from a world where kids were (literally) property of corse he’s gonna have complicated relationship with kids also the idea of whether they even deserve them is so sad cus the topic is hella grey. Also everything with Hajime oh boy that’s a bag of worms on its own he’d hella spiral if he had one

Don’t feel bad that the convo doesn’t have a lot of what you wrote! If anything it’s gonna sound more realistic cus unless with a therapist everything everyone says in a serious convo is dipped in like 3-5 layers of context that will never be brought up unless asked especially depending on how emotionally open they are

Also don’t apologize for having things to do, real life comes first :)

oh dw tumblr is sooooo functional (sarcasm)

the thing about fuyuhiko is i think hed be really really good with kids. despite everything, he loved natsumi so much, and you can tell that in a better world he would have been such a good big brother. i try to convey that in anything i write pertaining to his relationship with natsumi (which. the way theyre Actually related is something ive taken significant time thinking about lmao its Not simple), that he loved her and tried to do what he thought was best for her and protect her from the worst of their parents’ bullshit. i dont doubt that some of the times his parents hurt him during fights he was protecting her.

the problem is that he doesnt believe hed be good with kids because. fuyuhiko to me is the kind of person who because of circumstance and trauma believes that he is fundamentally a Bad and Broken Person but that hes Okay With That, that at least he can use the time he has left to protect the people who he sees as Good (ie most of the rest of his class, people who he sees as innocent, etc). this is something i think he believed even as a kid, and therefore something junko used wholeheartedly to manipulate him. its complicated.

but like… hes not. hes not a bad person, hes not broken, hes traumatized and has really bad anger issues, yes but. hes genuinely a really good person. he has a really strong moral compass, and overall believes in minimizing harm as much as possible, at least when it comes to people who dont deserve it. given enough time (and therapy) i think he would make a really really good parent.

and hajime… oof. personally i think hajime could ALSO be a really good parent (because its me) but again. lots of time. lots of therapy. his relationship with his parents is a whole other post in itself, but at the end of the day, hes definitely got multiple talents related to being nurturing in him. maybe not ‘ultimate father’ ‘ultimate mother’ or whatever because they would have been talents from teenagers, but something. and again, hajime is really really intent on human connection and letting himself and others feel emotions in a healthy way. thats a really good quality in a parent!!!

a lot of moral and ethical stuff regarding the remnants is SUPER gray just by virtue of who they are and it makes me go bonkers crazy wild makes me scream wail etc. love me a moral quandary. love me a fuckin. trolley problem-ass situation

[violentviolette]

throwing my opinion in for some reason, the reason i personally bristled at the 'feminine and delicate' part of ur post (which i wholeheartedly agreed with) wasn't the word feminine but the word delicate, and if someone referred to a vagina as delicate i'd be equally skeeved out, like the word is just so wrapped up in purity culture weirdness that referring to women's genitalia as delicate just feels icky, ya know?

see I completely understand that reaction and the place it comes from is not at all invalid

but it is inherently a view that stems from a very white and afab experience and thus it unintentionally completely misses the intersectionality that is needed in this discussion

trans women are gatekept from traditional feminity much in the way black cis women are. they are denied the right to be shown and described in ways that misogyny forces onto white afab people

when was the last time u saw in mainstream settings a trans woman or a black woman described as delicate? dainty? soft?

name any mainstream depiction of trans women who are soft and delicate flowers in need of saving and worthy of adoration and love?

that view is misogynistic when applied to white afab ppl because it is forced onto us, thats why it feels revolutionary to see white afab ppl being shown as masculine and strong and indipendant

but that experience is exactly the opposite for trans women of all races and for cis women of color (especially black women). they are majority depicted and described as masculine and hard and tough and abrasive and violent

so for those demographics being seen as traditionally feminine, as dainty and delicate and soft, is what's revolutionary and what feels more empowering

talk to any black woman and I'm sure a lot of them will talk about being sick of the "strong independent black woman who doesnt need love" trope. they want to be seen specifically in the ways society has denied them

same too goes for trans women. not all trans women obviously because no demographic is a monolith and butch trans women exist and their experiences are just as relevant and important

but for the most part, we have this inherent knee jerk reaction as a transmisogynistic society to not want to associate trans women's bodies with traditional feminity

and I think peoples discomfort with that part of the post in particular is very telling in just how uncomfortable that notion makes ppl. the notion that trans women's bodies, their penises, can be delicate and soft and feminine

I have gotten the most push back on those words specifically and I dont think thats a coincidence. people are uncomfortable with viewing penises in these ways and it is literally just because of how deep all of our own transmisogyny (and racism) goes

[sholangagaga]

What makes Bonnie throw hands (fight) with someone? What would he do to the poor fool lol

(I headcanon that Bonnie has no f*cks left to give and will dropkick someone in 'self defense')

- Ramen

I'm pretty sure I mentioned this in another post but I like to think Glamrock Bonnie is the more subdued than his past incarnations. Which is NOT to say that he still wouldn't throw hands, it's just that maybe his trigger is a bit more lenient than other Bonnies.

Bonnie just seems like the type who bottles up his frustration, but not for long. So minor things dont bother him, but when you push the issue, thats how you get a pissed off rabbit.

I agree with your hc wholeheartedly! Bonnie is definitely the type to shoot as a warning once you DO piss him off. That's why I feel he'd get along so well with Gregory, because they both have horrible impulse control when it comes to being wronged/enacting revenge.

Though my Bonnie would probably throw a bowling ball at someone's head and he's garnered himself a pretty decent fear following. (Characters like Monty and Foxy, while they like to bother Bonnie, would never do so to the extent of him getting genuinely angry. Because they know he'd fuck them up very easily)

[guxciestone]

i have no idea how you do not see the irony in rbing a post about accepting all lgbt people and immediately after rb a conspiracy post with blatant transphobia racism antisemitic dog whistles and terf logic im not trying to antagonize you but i need you to know that those theories are incredibly harmful to marginalized groups if you dont care or disagree thats fine but it was extremely tone-deaf

Hi! I hope you’re doing well ♡

If I had to be honest, @glitterheartz did say some off-the-wall stuff that could have potentially offended transgenders and the LGBTQ+ community as well as mixed people. I remember I would enjoy reading that post I reblogged and agreed with everything she was saying but then get confused when I read her theory about transgenderism being “man-made”, it was off-putting but I disregarded it at the time. Along with her theory with it being bad to “mix with other races”, I knew that there was a homophobic or racist undertone to it, I guessed I shrugged it off. Therefore I can say that I never claimed that I agreed with everything she said. I was more so emphasizing and praising on how she used to post conspiracy theories about celebrities, MK ultra mind control, the illuminati and stuff like that in general. I wasn’t really focusing on the smaller hints of homophobia and racism; I also don’t know what “terf logic” or “antisemetic dog whistles” are, maybe I skipped too many parts to see it. So I apologize if it seemed as though I was supporting all of that, I just liked her ideas surrounding celebrities and the crazy secret stuff behind hollywood.

And now thinking about it, although I don’t believe in Christianity wholeheartedly, she was a bit disrespectful towards the religion and other religions as well. I’m also sorry for that 💞

Thank you for calling this out to me!

Also, I do accept anyone and everyone, especially considering the fact that I have friends part of the LGBTQ+, of course I accept them, why wouldn’t I? It was stupid how I posted it right after the LGBTQ+ reblog. But, I sincerely apologize for the “irony”, it’s been a long time since I’ve read her conspiracy posts and I forgot that they had certain themes like that in it, the information probably seemed too subtle for me at the time. I should’ve revised it before reblogging and giving publicity to it. Again, I apologize and I hope you or anyone else isn’t offended by this-

Bye! 🤍

[backseatloversz]

hi !! ive seen a couple posts abt the dps fandom on my dash today and i agree w/ them wholeheartedly, and its reminded me of some other dps/fandom-in-general thoughts ive been meaning to say! so . here they are.

actors do not know you! we all know this one, right?

actors often arent the ones who wrote the characters

going off that,

actors often cannot confirm things as canon

for sure they can say they like your headcanons, thats fun!

but, again, that doesnt make it canon

which can also be fun, bc that means if you dont like the headcanon they agreed with, you can ignore it!

some things should stay in fandom, though

sometimes it can be nice not to get the validation/confirmation from an actor on a headcanon, cause that means you can do whatever you want with it, and nobody can go "um, actually-"

you know?

does that make sense?

probably ! i am gonna use an example anyway. to relate this back 2 dps lol

the ship anderperry! anderperry is great. i love it. im glad a lot of fans love it!

but, especially seeing how dps canonically ends and a lot of the negative messages it could imply if anderperry were intentional, a part of me appreciates it wasnt!

bc this means i can read and write as much as i want where anderperry is real, and they get a happy ending :)

and, relating this back to actors; since anderperry isnt canon, i can see gale hansen (who played charlie, not even ander- or -perry anyway, lol) saying he could see it, and he thinks that if it were canon, todd never wouldve talked about it after neil died, and i can completely ignore it! bc i dont like that. i like to think that, even if anderperry were real, and the canon ending happened, todd wouldve opened up about it w/ at least someone

(not to imply ppl asking gale abt ships/queer headcanons are in the wrong! he seems p open to answering those kinds of things, and i love that he supports the queer community/fans sm!! but just in general; his word + the word of most actors isnt law, and if actors have made it clear theyre uncomfortable w/ certain questions, leave it at that)

so. yea. actors often dont have the power to confirm stuff. actors dont know u, dont ask/send them dark/weird/etc things unwarranted. some things should be kept within fandom

ahh the magic of fandom & headcanons.

hope that all made sense

fin

[magic-is-something-we-create]

heya, pax! how are you? idk if it's possible to talk about this specific character without spoilers, so. . . i'd love to hear facts regarding ruti!

i just saw the 'rotten little man' post you reblogged and i remember ruti embodying 'cat pushes things off a surface' energy, lmao.

either way, hoping things will get better for you! and take care and wishing for you to stay safe. :3 - 🔮⛈

hi enchant!! im doin good!! and thank u for the well wishes, im sending the good vibes right back at ya!! <3<3<3

ruti absolutely embodies that energy of a cat, and i can delve into at least part of that without terrible spoilers, but he has decided to become one of my favorite side characters in echoseers so theres even more behind the cut <3

the biggest things that stand out about ruti:

- he's the cityheir of aree. its His Parents that are being overthrown in firebreathers

- he's ALSO the subject of gab's one-sided rivalry in the aree circus-theater because the citylord wants his boy to be the spotlight if he's gonna be an acrobat, and absolutely has bribed the ringleader several times to give ruti the lead

- ruti was not aware of the above and because gab is Professional he literally just thinks gab is his buddy.

- those two are just the perfect amount of similar catty mean-girl energy to absolutely hate each other given the opportunity

- aka when gab finally Snaps they are at each other's throats in the most petty way possible. this is where the line "Do these look chipped to you? Asshole?" *waving manicure in face* comes from

but for my favorite things about ruti........... we must dive into Spoilers. purposefully a bit vague so theres no huge things, but behind the cut nonetheless <3

SO. ruti palm. my new favorite Bastard.

turns out he was doing his damnedest to get his dad to listen to the rebellion before they got their shit rocked, and wholeheartedly agrees with the rebels. mans was literally working at the theater that whole goddamn time, he knows what the people think and care about and he's been made to care too. his dad's just a stubborn asshole

also when he wasn't in aree?? when he was in impalfahr for half the year on political business with his parents?? yeah that time??

he was being trained in espionage. BY ACTAEA. AT XAVI'S SIDE.

he then uses said training to rock her shit in return, albeit because he's paired with the Idiots Who Stumbled Into World-Saving Importance (aka gab + andy + ros) it does end up being entirely ineffective. but also xavi's kinda like an older brother to him, but also xavi Betrayed Him and he's still trying to grapple with that whole deal.

he's fully capable of sneaking up on and spying on the eternals, and has done it, and does it before the readers learn this about him. he also openly admits to breaking into tieling's office to burn a proposal his dad put forth to take back aree. because he's that ballsy.

also also: the one-sidedness of gab's rivalry? made all the clearer when ruti's like "YOU WERE LITERALLY THE ONLY PERSON WHO I THOUGHT EVEN MAYBE LIKED ME, WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE NOT MY FRIEND???" because.......... he literally just realized his Only Friend hates his guts.

yeah. that part made me sad for him. which i was not expecting ever to do.

ruti genuinely wants to be a good dude, he's just also super vain and was raised in a monarchy that told him he was The Most Specialest Boy (except his grandparents, thats a whole other homophobia deal thats left vague even in-book) and so he forgets to turn that whole line of thinking off sometimes.

still a lil bit of a dick but gab's also a dick and we love him for it so. yeah

i dont stan ruti but i Understand ruti. and i have absolutely laid the groundwork for him to come back up in later books after the Glittergale arc and we'll get to see him as a well-adjusted common man into some nefarious side gigs beyond his small theater troupe. and i am so excited for that

[fluffyheretic]

d0nt rebl0g this im mad and need to vent abt petty stupid shit

99% of this post is good and i agree with the message wholeheartedly but i am so sick like sick to DEEEAAAATH of seeing "gays, lesbians, and trans people" when there is literally nooooooo reason whatsoever to exclude bisexuals. i know people are gonna say im petty for this and be like "thats not the point of the post get over yourself" and maybe theyre right but idc! im gonna be petty rn fuck it. theres no reason to get mad over being excluded here? well there was no reason to exclude us in the first place either. im allowed to be put off by that.

bc heres the thing: if it was just this post id be like "oh thats kind of lame" but its NOT just this post, this isnt ABOUT this post, its a good post in every other respect, im just using it as an example here bc i see this happen literally all the damn time. this post is just the last straw on the camels back rn. people list out the acronym and do a hop skip and a jump right over a whole community and act like nobody will fucking notice or give a shit. and for what? why? whats the point??

"you cant expect them to list every identity" just say LGBT people then. lgbt+, lgbtq, whatever the hell you prefer but either list us out or dont. SGA people and trans people, sure, whatever works. i cant stand the q slur but id almost rather you say that just to at least act like youre trying to be inclusive.

like again i knoooow im gonna look petty for this. like yeah in the grand scheme its a small thing. the thing is im not even saying op is intentionally biphobic. i bet ey just didnt even think of it as ey were writing the post. that doesnt mean it doesnt hurt. that doesnt mean im not sick of seeing it happen over and over again. it feels like it doesnt matter what bisexuals complain about. big things, small things. it all gets brushed aside as us being too dramatic. small casual biphobia is still shitty. so fuck it. ill be overly dramatic and petty about the small things too. might as well for all the difference it makes. fuck it.

idk. its a good post with a good message. and also fuck that post and fuck this post that youre reading right now too. im so sick of this. dont take this too seriously or start shit over this bc i just needed to rant and get shit off my chest. but also do take it seriously. nobody takes us seriously. or dont. or do. idk idc bye.

[vanityloves]

Hai. heyheyheypspspsps hey pspsps Gush about murdoc. :grabbyhands:

GAJDFH i just made a whole post ab the guy saying hes pretty which, he is not. he doesnt deserve anymore praise. but yknow, ill 'lovingly' dissect him.

murdad and noodle time 😌😏

i thoroughly love his relationship w/ Noodle and its something thats always on my mind. Russ and 2d grew up with a loving family and it was something he couldnt relate to, along w/ a whole string of things. No one liked Murdoc when he got the band together and with good reason - I don't think that was an issue for him; for the 2 men to hate him anyways. But I think as time progressed he didn't have any connection to them and its was tense. He's an incredibly jealous individual and he 100% fooled around w/ Paula (2d's girlfriend and guitarist when they were just 'Gorilla') to spite 2D.

I think when Noodle came into the picture he didnt really know what to do besides use her talent for the bands personal gain/growth, but over time (and quite quickly) he became extremly fond of her. He doesn't have the heart (or literal soul) to say anything bad about her as shown in interviews. Murdoc- the guy who "hates everyone including himself" had nothing bad to say ab her...in fact he talks ab her highly and defends her and it makes me so happy. Its obvious he cares about her a lot and doesnt know how to show it.

I like to think they connected bc of their relationship w/ their own family or lack of one: which was either... abusive or no 'real family' stated. It's definitely not spoken about and i dont think Murdoc would look into it/notice it/ think hard ab it but he gravitates towards Noodle bc it was almost comforting to see someone her age so sweet and kind bc he definitely wasnt when he was that young. He definitely wanted to keep her safe but I think thats what makes Murdoc extremely tragic. But thats another post.

None of the boys knew how to raise a kid and Murdoc was apprehensive of being parental towards her due to his upbringing bc all he knew was abusive behavior and i think every so often he gets extremely distant from her especially when he realizes that he's actually taking care and doting on her in the 'conventional' ways. He leaves the nitty gritty to Russ and 2D but he did have a hand in raising her - its widely accepted that Russ was Noodles true dad of the band and I can Agree w/ that! But I feel like she'd come to him for help too - he was a funky kind of hypeman for her or would feed into her chaotic ideas and let her be angry and throw tantrums bc 'sometimes it feels good to just yell' - thankfully she was fairly mild tempered. He has a funny way of talking, which i assume is something she enjoyed; Noodle even says Murdoc makes her laugh all the time and even when hes grumpy, she still likes him. I just love the contrast of the Eldest of the band, someone extremely vulgar and not very child friendly,,, being child friendly for her. He's nothing close to perfect but i wholeheartedly believe he tried to do things for her and it was easy bc she wasnt extremly needy - he wasnt uncomfortable with her as i feel he would be with children. Tried to comfort her when she had stagefright, or kept the secrets she couldn't share w/ 2D or Russ, and he'd stay up late w/ her when she couldnt sleep/let her sleep with him on particularly hard nights, let her run around the house and do her own thing, he let her have Fun and his influence definitely rubbed off on her, and now; Noodle in her 30s and Murdoc in his 50's hes kept that "annoying my daughter" vibe w/ her. Can she ever forgive eveyrthing he's done? No, and I think apart of Murdocs growth is accepting that he can't be forgiven for everything. But she loves him and he cares ab her in the most 'fatherly way' he can manage.