#i actually made smt else but I hate it

[ghostlylinks]

I love you Cloud Strife keep having birthdays

[luvonmes-blog]

Guilty

Y/N and Suguru were damn near polar opposites of each other. Y/N, a girl who wore her heart on her sleeve and gave and gave until she couldn't anymore. Suguru, a cocky dickhead who was spoon-fed opportunities and was given everything he ever wanted. how could the two ever make anything work?

Warnings - 18+ MDNI!! enemies to lovers! hockey player!geto, ice skater!reader, tatted!geto, pierced!geto, he gets bitched, getos a whiny little boy, smut, rough sex, sappy sex, daddy kink, breeding kink towards the end, some spit, sex in a public place, at some point Satoru walks in, Y/N kinda cries a lot (self-projection is real). i think theres more? lmk if i missed anything! w.c - 18.5k, not proof read. Song - Guilty By: TAEMIN

PSA - please do not compare this to Icebreaker. ik because of ice skating and the release of this book it’s the first thing you think of but, number one, that book sucks. number two, the book is supposed to have elements and revolve around muslim culture, the author obviously did not do enough research on what it is to be muslim and i hate it. number three, i actually spent time researching and even had someone help me make sure this was the best i can possibly make it, i’d like if my work was appreciated for being my work instead of it being appreciated because it reminds you of smt else. thank you!

all in all, DO NOT COMPARE THIS TO ICEBREAKER.

very special shout out to @r0ses4ndlilies for helping me use the proper ice skating terms!!!

----------------

to say Suguru Geto was meant to be something - someone - important was as if to say the sun was meant to shine. obvious. 

from a young age Suguru knew he was special, gifted in academics and sports, the only person to rival him - his own best friend, Satoru. the boys were their hometowns' prized possessions. their families bragged about them, boys wanted to be them, girls fawned after them. being in their presence meant there was never a dry day but as they grew older, they grew more focused. straying away from others to pursue their dream careers. the dream was finally reached in their college years, being accepted into the prestigious university, Tokyo Metropolitan Technical College. as soon as they graduated high school they were offered full rides to the school, as long as they played on the hockey team.

they took the offer without hesitation, going to one of the highest ranked schools and getting to play the sport of their dreams? easy yes. that was almost four years ago, the boys are in their last year of college, still playing for the hockey team, almost ready to graduate. the team was the best it had been in years, only three losses since Suguru and Satoru joined the team. not only were they the best on the team but the most popular in their frat as well - Sigma Beta Chi, courtesy of Satoru dragging Sugura to join along with him. 

then there was you.

to say you had busted your ass to get where you were today would be an understatement. you poured your blood sweat and tears to get to the spot you’re in, captain of the TMTC ice skating team. as a child you’d always dreamed of becoming a figure skater. a video you had seen sparked your interest and since then you’d never let it go. it was hard, growing up your grandfather had tried his best to support you, going out of his way to pay for your skating lessons and even putting you into an after school program. he never told you of his financial struggles, he didn’t want you to give up on your dream but when you found out, you vowed to pay him back any way you could. you made sure your grades in school couldn’t be challenged, you took on many temp jobs, making money any way you could, while balancing the energy-draining skate practices you went to at night.

in your third year both upper and lower-classmen voted you as captain for the school's team and you were over the moon. you immediately called your grandfather to tell him the great news and he was just as happy as you, forever and always your number one supporter. since you became captain you’ve pushed yourself to and over your limit, challenging yourself in any way possible to make sure you were always at your best. many late nights were spent at the rink until your legs hurt so much you weren’t sure you’d be able to walk back to your dorm. you made sure the team was as best as they possibly could be, some members thought you were a bit harsh but never challenged you. after all, you had won them gold three times in a row for the first time in years. 

the only conflict you had ever had in your four years of being a student at TMTC was with the hockey team. ironic seeing as your sports were the most similar of any other sport on campus but the rumor of all hockey players seemed true, they were dicks. especially the co-captains Suguru and Satoru. they didn’t seem to take your sport seriously, always taunting you whenever they’d see you. snide comments about your figure when they’d see you at practice or remarks about the uniforms you and the team wore. you wouldn’t go as far as to say you hate them (that’s just not you) but you weren’t particularly fond of them. they constantly got on your nerves, their deep boisterous laughs making your eye twitch whenever you heard them.

they ground your gears so much you just tried your best to avoid them. it wasn’t that hard seeing as you all lived on opposite sides of campus and in the two classes you had with Suguru, you sat closest to the wall while he sat dead center with his loud friends. Suguru was smart, extraordinarily so, which is exactly why you didn’t understand why he was such an asshole. you truly believed you two could be great friends but he was so rude it turned you away almost immediately. you never understood why he was so mean to you. the first time you had met you were all smiles and kind waves, you went to introduce yourself to him and he shot you down.

the coaches of both teams had called a meeting for all new team members. it was a run down of the rules and regulations, anti-harassment, anti-bullying, non-discrimination. so much that has done for you. after the meeting was over the coaches gave you the choices of either leaving or the opportunity to mingle. you took the chance to mingle, forever a social butterfly, going up to many different people. some of the girls from your team were a little hostile but open to talking, the hockey boys well… if they didn’t try to hit on you they mostly seemed uninterested in the conversation. making your rounds you finally ended up in front of Suguru and Satoru. Satoru had looked you up and down before walking away, hadn’t even given you the time. holding your hand out for Suguru to shake, you smiled at him. 

“hi, i’m Y/N.” he stared at you before mumbling under his breath. you thought he was going to say something to you but Satoru had called after him, saying something about pizza. Suguru placed the cup he was drinking out of in your hand and walked over to his best friend. “o-oh…” he looked back at you, your face stuck with your mouth open and eyes wide, shocked. a couple of times after you tried to approach him, trying your best to give him the benefit of the doubt, maybe he’s not so mean. time and time again he proved you wrong. you would bring in gifts for the team, snacks for practice, water, anything they’d need. everyone was always so grateful, Satoru had even said thank you maybe a handful of times. Suguru had never even muttered anything. 

you kept trying, ever the people pleaser, finding different ways to appease him, if you noticed he seemed to enjoy something more than another you would bring it in more. you would try to catch up to him after practice, spark up a conversation, he never seemed to care enough. you couldn’t understand why you were so obsessed with making him like you. maybe it was because growing up you always made sure everyone liked you, never leaving the house with a hair out place, always bending over backwards to make sure everyone was at least content with you. maybe it was because you couldn’t function if you felt like there was any sort of scrutiny upon your character. maybe you were so obsessed with making him like you because you had a little crush- no, no way. you kept up, trying so hard to get on his good side. it took up until one night, one night and the fixation fell. you were walking out after a long day of practice, he was in front of you, looking down on his phone. 

“hey!” you yelled after him, starting in a little jog to catch up to him. he stopped for a second as you stepped next to him. “hi.” you were panting a little bit, breaths coming out in clouds due to the cold air. the snow that was falling landed in your eyelashes, you were smiling at him, so bright and wide, you looked so cute. cuter than anyone Suguru has seen before. “um, i saw a spin you did back there when you were practicing. i was wondering if maybe you could show it to me. i’ve seen some other skaters on your team do it before too, it’s really cool and i was hoping i could take it back to my team and show them.” you looked up at him, hopeful.

“yeah, no.”

“oh. please? i’d really appreciate it.” you flashed him with that bright smile of yours. he was tempted to say yes, so tempted. if he did teach you maybe he could make you smile more. smile at him. 

“i said no.” you pouted, he was walking away before he turned back around to face you. your face lit back up, eyes sparkling, maybe he changed his mind? “and leave me alone, i notice the weird shit you do to get my attention. it’s annoying, stop.” your face dropped. he turned his back towards you again. after that day you did exactly what he said, left him alone. from that day on you’d begun avoiding him.

you’d done a great job at it too, for years you stayed out his way… until today.

it was another late night at the rink. wednesdays the rinks were always empty for mandatory deep cleaning, the captains would usually ask the manager of the building if they could borrow it on these nights to practice by themselves. there was a deal that the captains of the separate teams could have the rink every-other wednesday, tonight was your night. you were on your way into the rink, texting your friend Bri, she was telling you about how Satoru was staring at her from across the lecture hall. she was obsessed, it was odd seeing as you told her how much he got on your nerves and how he teased you in public. she didn’t seem to care too much. 

as you were heading to the locker room you heard clinking coming from the ice, you had assumed it was the cleaning crew, they’d usually be finishing up right about now. lacing up your skates you finally put your phone down, over Bri’s delusions, you were too afraid to cut her off as a friend, scared of the potential consequences. walking to the rink, your guards scuffing against the floor as you dragged your feet, already feeling the pain in your legs. you were just about to sit down and take your guards off before you saw him. the infamous number two on his jersey moving against his body as he moved the hockey puck around with his customized stick.

“hey!” you yelled out through the windows separating the bleachers and the rink. “what are you doing?” he stopped just as he was about to hit the puck into the makeshift goal he mapped out in the corner. turning around to look at you with low eyes.

“what does it look like i’m doing?” he answered back, snarkily.

“it looks like you’re taking up my time.” you were annoyed, he knows this is your time, you’d even specified yesterday. talking just loudly enough for the hockey team to hear from across the rink, you knew they were listening in, they always do. 

“your time?” he scoffed.

“yeah, my time.” you rolled your eyes. “listen, i don’t know how long you’ve been here but it’s long enough. i really don’t want to be mean or make this bigger than it is but i really need to practice. i’d really appreciate it if you left.” you gave him the kindest smile you could then sat down to take the guards off your skates.

“alright, princess, i was here first. that means i get the rink.” his arms were out at his side, gesturing to the rink. you shot back up quickly.

“no!” you exclaimed. “this is my night. you being here first doesn’t mean anything. and i told you to stop calling me that.” princess. the stupid nickname he had given you two years ago. you were leaving the rink after a meeting between the two teams, him and Satoru trailing behind laughing and giggling to each other. he’d tried calling after you, yelling your name a couple of times, you had ignored him, not wanting to deal with their antics. he yelled after you once more before the godforsaken nick-name fell from his lips. you stopped immediately, turning on your heels before telling him to not call you that. after that he made it a point to call you it whenever he could.

“first come first serve, princess.” your eye twitched. 

“Geto-”

“what’s up with the formalities? can’t call me by my name?” he raised an eyebrow at you.

“can you just leave?” 

“i already told you-”

“i know what you told me and i’m telling you, it’s my night here and i’d like to practice now.” your tone was stern.

“no.” he stated simply. you guffawed.

“no?”

“no.” you took a deep breath before turning away.

“y’know what, nevermind.” beginning to walk away you heard the sound of his skates against the ice.

“you giving up that easily princess!?” he yelled after you. you turned back around to find him at the door of the rink, coming towards you.

“can you just not? i’m not in the mood for this today.” turning back around and trudging to the locker room. he caught up to you quickly - the advantage of having long legs - grabbing your arm. you pulled away immediately, walking away faster. at that he put out his stick, knocking it against the blade of your right skate, harder than he intended. you hit the ground before you could try to catch yourself. your knees took the brunt of the fall as well as your palms. turning over to sit down you felt a sharp pain in your ankle. as you lifted to assess it you heard a snap, yout foot fell ungracefully. looking down, a piece of the blade of your skate lay next to your shoe.

“shit.” Suguru muttered under his breath. “i- i’m sorry.” you wouldn’t look up at him, staring at your broken skate. he heard your shuddering breath before he saw a tear fall and soak into your stockings. “um- here, let me-”

“asshole.” he reached to help you up but you pulled away. unlacing your other skate and ripping it off, you shot up, grabbing your skates along with the broken blade, stumbling before quickly limping away. “you’re such a fucking asshole.” sniffling and wiping your face, you headed to the locker room. he followed after. “just go away.”

“stop being such a bitch and let me help you.” you stopped and whipped around to face him.

“i’m being bitch?” you questioned exasperatedly. “you broke my fucking skate and i’m being a bitch?!” he had never heard you speak so crudely. you’ve called him an asshole on multiple occasions, him and Satoru but he’d never heard you say fuck. it’s like you refused. “look at what you did! you’ve been torturing me since junior year and i’m the fucking bitch! do you know how much these cost?! how much new ones will cost?!” you were damn near hyperventilating, pacing back and forth. 

“i’ll get you a new pair.” you scoffed and put your hands on your hips, facing the wall, the shoes in each one of your hands.

“you'll get me a new pair. you’ll get me a new pair?! do you even know where these came from?!” you were in distress, overwhelmed, Suguru seemed to have that effect on you. “you can’t just get me a new pair, Geto. i can’t believe you.” your voice broke. “i- i always knew you were a dick but i really didn’t you’d go so far to break my skates.”

“it’s really not that big of a deal.” he rolled his eyes.

“not a big deal?” you finally turned to face him, the look on your face did something to him, it actually made him feel… bad. “they were from my grandfather, he made them for me in junior year and the guy who made them closed shop the next year. you can’t get another pair.” shit. shit. he fucked up, bad. he was in too deep now, if he owned up to it now then that would means he’s wrong and Suguru Geto he never been wrong. well, not if you ever asked him.

“this wouldn’t have happened if you had just left.” 

“it’s my night Geto, you knew that!”

“yeah well i needed the practice.”

“what the fuck did you think i needed?”

“come on, we both know which one of us is more important here.” you were pissing him off, he was deflecting.

“you can’t be serious.”

“i am. nobody takes you fucking serious, nobody cares about watching you parade around on the rink in your small little fucking skirts.” you looked up to the ceiling and nodded your head.

“right.” you turned away from him. “you’re right.” you walked away, he heard you go into the locker room and he went back to the ice. eventually he heard the front doors open and close.

----------------

for the next three weeks he had not seen you come into your wednesday practices. he purposely came to the ones he knew you would be at but you had never showed up. he would wait until closing time, staying until the custodial staff would kick him out, you never appeared. he noticed you were in and out of your classes as well. you had the same classes together everyday, civics and economics, some days you would be there but have your head down and constantly checked your phone. other days you weren’t there at all. he had asked your professors if he could have your papers, to make sure you were getting them but each of them had replied that you didn’t need them, you were all caught up.

you didn’t come to your teams practices either, luckily you had always taught them the drills you came up with way beforehand. if Suguru had ever cared to look deeper into who you are (which he’d never admit that he did) he would maybe, possibly, just maybe own up to the fact that he might admire the way you carried yourself. you’re a great captain, an amazing skater, and an even better student. you’re just up there with him and Satoru. he’ll never tell you that though. he oftentimes wondered what you thought about him. did you think he was smart? a good skater? do you think he’s attractive? he wants to know if you think of him the way he thinks of you. he’ll never ask. 

eventually you came back. two more weeks of not being there, then, he saw you again. you were in class, back at practice, running drills and laughing with your friends. but he noticed something different, you were more reserved, if you weren’t with your friends you weren’t with anyone at all. your smile didn’t reach your eyes like it usually did. after practice you left immediately, not waiting for everyone to leave like you usually did. you were out of the door before anybody could say bye. you weren’t you. Suguru looked after you, even if you weren’t aware, he did. he made sure when him and Satoru picked on you they never went too far. when he heard other guys on the team talk about you, he shut it down almost immediately. Suguru cared, he’d never outright show it or tell you but he did. 

even now that you’re back you still weren’t coming to your wednesday practices. at some point he stopped going for “practice” and would wait for you to walk through the doors. you never did. he got around to asking one of your teammates, Yari, where you had been. she told him you found a new rink, a better one. apparently you knew the manager well and he would give you the space for two nights a week. she had said you lucked out, the rink was spacious and had more to offer. Suguru thanked Yari by finger-fucking her in the back office. she walked out dazed with a blissed out smile on her face while he sat… disgusted. he didn’t even like her. he didn’t like a lot of the girls he slept with, he just did. building up a reputation of one of the best fucks on campus, besides Satoru of course. 

he’s always wanted one girl. he’s always wanted you but you’ve never paid him any mind. around campus he’s heard about you, the boyfriend you had in junior year, how much he hurt you and how you swore off relationships after. choosing to focus on school like you had promised yourself you would once entering the university. Suguru had a girlfriend, plenty of them. they never lasted, he couldn’t stay tied down to one girl. eyes always wandering. he broke up with them before it got too serious. he liked them enough to get with them just… not enough to stay. 

walking into class you were heading to, looking at your phone checking your grandfather's location to make sure he was home like you told him to be. stopping in your tracks when you came across big black combat boots. looking up he had an all black outfit to match, like usual. his hair was down in a low bun, some strands framing his face. rolling your eyes and breathing out a sigh as you looked at him.

 “what do you want?” sitting up in his - your - seat he sat down his pencil on the desk. 

“you weren’t here.” he shrugged. 

“so you took my seat?” he could see the annoyance bleeding onto your face. 

“it’s not like you were here to stop me.” you just looked at him like he was stupid. 

“fine.” moving away and three rows behind him, you plopped down into a random desk. he grabbed all his stuff and took up the desk next to you. you looked at him before looking away and to the window. your leg started bouncing up and down. “you just don’t give up do you?” 

“give up what?” 

“what do you want, Geto?” you turned towards him. “what do you want? you want me to cry again? you want me to grovel?” 

“no. i just-”

“then what?”

“i was gonna say sorry but never-fucking-mind.” 

“you were gonna say sorry?” you laughed in his face. “that’s a good joke, Geto.” for some reason that got on his nerves. 

“what? i can’t apologize?”

“it’s not that you can’t. you don’t.” you’re right. “i don’t care anyway. so even if you do, it doesn’t matter.” he didn’t know what to say so for the rest of class he sat in silence. when the bell rang you packed your things up and left quickly. it was the last class of the day and he watched the direction you went in, he knew where you were headed so he followed. when you walked into the rink it was completely empty. you stopped in your tracks. 

“all practices were canceled today.” 

“you’re telling me now?”

“you didn’t get the email?”

“obviously not, Geto.” turning to leave you push past him but he grabs your arm. looking up into those brown eyes of his you try to pull away but he grips harder. “can you let go now?” 

“why do you act like that?” you look at him confused. 

“act like what.” 

“like you hate me.” 

“maybe cause i do.” you rip away from him, heading to the doors. he quickly catches up and blocks you from leaving. you let out a huff and try to push past him. “move.”

“you don’t hate me.”

“why wouldn’t i?” you look up at him. “hm? you make fun of my uniforms. you always say my drills suck. you and Satoru make fun of my team and my sport. you comment on the way i skate. hell, you broke my skates. skates i can’t get back. so why wouldn’t i?” 

“hate isn’t in your vocabulary.” he states, simply. he’s right, it’s not but would you let him know that? 

“yeah? how would you know?” he stared at you, questioning whether you did hate him or not. you were right, how would he know? pulling away from him you turn towards the locker rooms, if practice was canceled here today you would go somewhere else. he watched you for a second, contemplating leaving before he followed after you quickly. grabbing your things from your locker you watched him walk into the women’s locker room. “you’re not supposed to be in here-” he rushed over to you and before you could finish your sentence, his lips covered yours. his kiss was rough, lips moving over yours hurriedly, teeth gnawing at your bottom lip. your arms stayed at your side and your eyes were wide. you pushed him away, making space between your bodies. “what is wrong with you?” you were panting, chest rising and falling quickly. 

he moved in again, lips back on yours, this time you didn’t pull away. your bag fell off your shoulders and your new skates fell to the ground. your lips met his harshly, your fingers tangling in his hair. you pulled him down towards you, hunching him over. his hands slid around your waist to grip onto your shirt. he pushed you back into the lockers, the metal clanging as your body met them, he quickly spun you around, your torso pressing into the metal. he sucked on your ear and trailed wet kisses down your neck, the metal ball of his tongue piercing trailing down your skin. he panted into your skin as he ground his hardening cock on your ass. 

“if you’re gonna fuck me Geto, get it over with.” you breathed. his hand wrapped around your neck, arching your back and resting your head against his shoulder. 

“is that how you should talk to me? i’ll leave you right here.”

“your loss.” you shrugged, pushing him away to grab your things. before you could stray too far he pushed you back against the lockers. he made quick work of unbuttoning his pants and tugging them down just below his dick then, he pulled down your sweatpants, they pooled around your ankles. he ground his cock into your backside and groaned into your neck. his precum dripped on your back as he humped your ass. “hurry up.” you grumbled. sliding his tip through your folds, he pressed into your hole, sliding in only the tip before slipping back out. he did this over and over again until you were huffing in annoyance. 

behind you, his face was beet red. he was panting, teasing you and himself in hopes of dragging this out for as long as he possibly could. finally over it, you stamped your foot down, ready to completely push him off of you. he didn’t give you the chance, stuffing his cock all the way into you at once, shuffling forward to press his entire body into yours. you yelped out as his entire length throbbed in you, shaping your ways to accommodate for every ridge and vein. he’s the biggest you’ve ever taken, so thick you’re sure your walls are stretched to the fullest and so long you could feel him in your throat. 

“oh, fuck.” he moaned behind you. his heart was pounding in over-exertion. he was focusing so hard on trying not to cum so soon. he gave you time to adjust and time for himself to calm down before he busted before he even started. he groaned into your neck as you clenched around him, trying to get used to his girth. 

“fuck, move.”

“you sure?” 

“please, come on, just move Geto.” he nodded his head. giving one exploratory thrust, trying to gauge how you feel, how he'd feel. he moaned as his cock moved in and out of you. he could already feel the coil winding up within his lower stomach, he wasn’t gonna last. he thrust again, a whimper escaping his lips. your eyebrows raised at the noise. he whimpered. he started to develop a rhythm, hips moving languidly against yours. his hands moved up your body, gripping your boobs through your shirt, you’re not wearing a bra. he pinched your nipples through your shirt and a noise escaped your lips. the prettiest moan fell from your lips. 

he angled his hips differently and he hit that certain spot in you just right. a louder moan exited your mouth and he whimpered at it. your moans are so pretty, so pretty they made his dick throb. little “ah, ah, ah’s” left your lips at each thrust, everything about him took over your entire being. all you could feel was his hands on your body, all you could smell was his cedarwood and vanilla cologne. you were drowning in him, every sense revolved around him. Suguru couldn’t feel anything else besides your tight walls gripping him. you were so tight around him his eyes rolled back. he’d never been so vocal before, let alone whined to a girl he was fucking. 

you brought something in him, something he didn’t know existed. a need. a need for him to express how good you’re making him feel. “faster.” he shook his head against your shoulder. “come on, Geto, faster.” 

“i can’t, fuck,” he whined. “i’ll cum, i’ll fucking cum and it’ll all be over.” 

“already?” you moaned out a scoff. “i’m not even close, Geto.” he thrust into you faster. his length continuously brushing over you g-spot. one hand that was gripping your boob moved down to rub circles over your clit. his fingers were nimble and quick but messy. the circles are uncoordinated but good enough to make your thighs shake. you're so wet it's dripping down your thighs and getting on his, his hand is soaked now. 

“stop calling me that.” he whined. “say my name.”

“that is your name-”

“no. my name please.” he sounded so pretty whining for you. 

“Suguru.” he moaned. “i’m gonna cum, Suguru.” you were the one whining now. 

“please.” he rubbed your clit faster, hurriedly thrusting into you. you met him thrust for thrust, moving with him. “fuck, just like that, princess.” the claps of skin on skin could be heard throughout the locker room. you pray to whatever God out there that no one is here. “i’m gonna cum, i need you to first.” he licked a stripe up your neck, leading to your ear before he bit at your lobe. his nose pressed into your ear and he panted into your skin, harsh breaths against you. all the stimulation was getting to you, his fingers rubbing at your clit, his other hand grabbing your boob, his mouth breathing heavily against you and biting at you. the final straw was when he moved his hand from your chest to your neck, squeezing slightly, just enough to make your breathing labored and make you dizzy. your head fell to his shoulder and you dear damn screamed out as you came.  

your thighs shook violently as you creamed around Suguru. the essence of your orgasm dripping down his cock. his mouth dropped open as he felt you clench and unclench around him. he moaned out as he felt his own orgasm creeping up on him. “pull out.” you whimpered. “Suguru, pull out.” he didn’t want to, God, he didn’t want to. finally building up enough strength, he pulled out. his hand wrapped around his tip, jerking his cock quickly, your wetness helping his hand glide smoothly up and down his skin. the first spurt of his cum landed on your back, the warm fluid dripped down your back. the rest came and he moaned with each one. his chest heaved as he came, possibly the hardest he has since his first time, maybe better than that. there was so much of it too, long thick strings painted on your back. he removed his grip from his dick and ran his thumb through the small puddle on your back, smearing it across your skin.

“that was…” he huffed out a breath, smiling up at the roof.

“yeah, let’s not talk about it.” you were quick to pull up your pants. 

“what?” Suguru followed after, pulling up his pants, buttoning them, and buckling his belt. “i thought- i thought it was good. you thought it was good right?” you gathered all your things and headed to the door. 

“it was fine.”

“just fine?” you were rushing to the front door. “come on, it was more than just fine. Y/N, look at me.” you kept going, not sparing him a glance. “come on.” he reached out for you, grabbing your shoulder and turning you to him. “look at me.”

“for what?!” you yelled at him. “for what? it happened. you can go brag about it.” 

“you think i’m gonna brag about it?”

“that’s what you do, Geto. you fuck some girl and go tell the team about it or some boy in your frat. next thing you know the whole school knows about it and that girls just some whore. i’ve gone this fucking long without being caught up in this shit and you corner me once now i’m one of them.” tears built up in your eyes. “at least give me the courtesy of not saying my name.” you walked away from him, leaving him to stand alone, stunned.

----------------

Geto didn’t tell anyone. it’s been two weeks and he hasn’t muttered a single word about what happened in the rink. he didn’t even tell Satoru, the only person in the world he tells everything. ever since it happened you wouldn’t even look at him. if he caught your eyes you would immediately cast yours down. you went back to avoiding him and he hated it, he fucked up. he still can’t explain what came over him that night, he doesn’t know why it happened but he can’t take it back now. he thought it would open the door for something, some way in for him. it didn’t. 

one of your friends, Reí, had noticed something was up with you. you were quieter, there was this awkward air to you. she approached you one day when you were leaving class. 

“hey, what’s up with you?” you were heading to the quad, it was lunch time and you had some extra work you’d like to get done, you figured fresh air would be good for you. 

“nothings up with me.” you chuckled awkwardly. you took a seat on a bench under a shady tree. the sky was a little muted today, the fall season in full effect, it wasn’t a bright day like it usually would be. the sky not a bright blue and the sun not shining as much as it would. it seemed as though the earth was reflecting your mood. 

“come on, Y/N/N, be honest with me.” she laughed. “what’s up?” you huffed a bit as you looked over your campus. a gust of wind blew past you, blowing your hair over your shoulder. 

“i fucked up.” you whispered. 

“you? you never fuck up.” Reí tried to joke. 

“i did, i do. i- i don’t know.” you began to pick at your nails. 

“what happened?” you sighed before turning to look her in her eyes. 

“there’s this guy.” 

“a guy?”

“yeah.”

“so… what about this guy? do you like him? is that it, you like a guy?”

“no. i don’t like this guy, that’s the problem.”

“well Y/N/N, i don’t think it’s that much of a problem. you don’t like him, it can’t be that serious. right?”

“we fucked.”

“oh!”

“we fucked and i don’t know what to do.” you sobbed, tears running down your face. Reí moved closer and pulled you into a hug, her arms wrapping around you and petting your hair. she shushed you as you cried into her neck. “i don’t do that type of thing and- and ever since J i haven’t done anything and then this one guy comes out of nowhere and just fucks it all up!” 

“it’s ok, we all have flings in college, it’s cool.”

“no! it’s not just a fling, Reí, i hate this guy.” your sentences came out in broken sobs. “that was never supposed to happen and now when everyone finds out they’re gonna think i’m some slut for letting it happen.” you pulled back to look at her, your lower lip trembling as you spoke. 

“why would anybody think that?” she tucked pieces of your hair behind your ear and wiped your tears. 

“cause that’s what everybody thinks.” you looked down and played with your hands. “everyone here thinks all the girls here who have sex are nasty.” you looked back up to her. “i don’t wanna be nasty.” you pouted. 

“aww, baby, no one’s gonna think you’re nasty.”

“yes they will.” you nodded at her. “you should’ve heard what they said when me and J broke up. he told them what we did. he told them i let him take my virginity and everyone called me really mean names.” you swallowed harshly. “it took months for everyone to forget about that, until the next thing happened everyone was so mean. i didn’t even do anything! i thought i was just being a good girlfriend.” 

“what do you mean?” she gave you a puzzled look.

“J wanted to have sex.” you looked into her eyes. “i told him i wasn’t ready but he told me everyone else was doing it. he said that we should too and i’d be the best girlfriend. i didn’t even know what i was supposed to do.”

“Y/N/N he didn’t… did he?”

“no. i told him it was ok but i regretted it after. he got mad i didn’t wanna do anything anymore so he broke up with me.” another tear trailed down your face. “he told almost everyone. all the girls laughed at me and all they guys called me a prude. said i wasn’t even worth it.” 

“he was a dick, Y/N/N. he wasn’t worth it and i’m so sorry that happened.” you shrugged at her. “but, what does this have to do with this guy?” she tilted her head, her pretty brown hair falling over her shoulder. 

“cause he’s a dick too. he’s a dick and i know he’s gonna tell everyone.”

“how long ago was it?” 

“like… two weeks ago?”

“well, i haven’t heard anything and y’know, most guys wouldn’t wait two weeks to start telling everyone who he fucked, right?”

“i guess.” 

“look, i know this is a lot to think about, how about we get your mind off it. let’s go get some lunch, on me?” she was hopeful, she didn’t want to watch you sulk, you’re one of the best and brightest people she knows. you shook your head. 

“i have some stuff to do.” you whispered. 

“ok. fine, ok. you want me to sit with you?”

“no. i wanna be alone if that’s ok.”

“sure. just- just let me know if you need anything, yeah? i’m always here.” you gave her a nod and she leant down to give you a peck on the forehead before she walked away. she’d always been a good friend to you. looking back out to the campus, you saw his familiar black hair, in a half up half down style now. he walked with some girl - Yari, from your team - he was walking her to the science building and once they reached the front doors, she turned around and smiled at him. they spoke for a bit before he grabbed her by her chin, pulling her to him and planting a kiss on her lips. once he let go she looked up to him, her eyes sparkling. 

your heart clenched. 

getting up and gathering your things you stormed off and towards your dorm. retreating there for the rest of the day. 

Suguru didn’t mean to get involved with Yari. really, it just… happened. he was upset about the situation between you two and she just so happened to be there. the only reason he’s stayed talking to her for this long is because in some way, she reminds him of you. the way her eyes light up when she looks at him, as if he’s hung the moon and the stars, it reminds him of how you used to look at him way back when. before he fucked you over. before he was so mean to you, how your eyes would shine when you looked at him. if he squinted just enough when looking at her, he could see you. ever since that night in the rink, he’s only wanted to see you. to feel you again, to hold you. his hands have been itching to grab for you whenever you two cross paths. not having you is like living hell. he hates it. 

finally leaving Yari, he turns around to head to his own class. making his way across the quad he sees a figure hurriedly walking in some direction. when he looks over at it, he recognizes it’s you. he wants to follow you, so bad. but he knows he shouldn’t, if he did you’d probably have his head on a stake. 

----------------

another week had passed before you started feeling somewhat like yourself again. Reí had decided to take you out a couple of days ago. she took you to the diner not too far off campus, you two talked over milkshakes and french fries. she didn’t pry too much but talking to her made you feel like you had a weight lifted off your chest. it felt great. practice was canceled again today, something about one of the coaches having a family emergency, so the rink was free for the day. 

you decided to take it over for the night. one of the custodians told you no one was coming in tonight so you were free to have it. you were trying to get one specific move down, the same one you’ve been trying to learn since freshman year. it was a move all hockey players used. a hockey stop, simple yet, you’d once seen Suguru spin and come to a full hockey stop. you’d wondered how he did it. while your sports were similar there was a clear difference between them. figure skaters were gentle with their movements and it took more agility to follow through with them. hockey players were more aggressive. hockey was about defense and brutality, the players were more up-front and they lacked flexibility. 

while you were a figure skater, you did appreciate hockey and had taken a liking to practicing their moves. you’d even introduced some into the choreography of your team, giving some contrast to the ensemble. the harshness of the hockey moves plus the gentleness of figure skating make for a beautiful scene. you’ve mastered the hockey stop, it’s an easy move but when you had watched Suguru do a complete 360 and come to the stop it was something you had wanted to do as well. while you’d seen him do it years ago it never really left your head and with the new choreography you were coming up with, you wanted to include the move. 

you were getting closer, you think. well, it was better than before. at first you had completely busted your ass, sliding along the ice and hurting your chin. now most times when you fell, you went down slower. able to catch yourself before you fell on your ass again. as you were practicing you fell again, sitting down and huffing out a breath. the ice nipped at your legs through your tights and you sat for a second, looking up at the roof before looking down to play with your hands. what you hadn’t noticed was a guest within the seats, watching you as you tried to ace the move over, and over again. 

“you’re putting too much weight on your back foot.” your head shot around quickly, turning to face the booming voice. you rolled your eyes when you looked at him. there he stood, 6 '2'' stature wearing all black, his arms at his side and his jet black hair falling over his wide shoulders. 

“can you just go away?” 

“can i help you?” the question was genuine, he wanted to help. and maybe spend time with you. 

“no.”

“why not?”

“cause i don’t want your help.” you deadpanned. Suguru got up and walked away, you thanked God he chose to adhere to your request. getting back up, you went to the other side of the rink, skating yourself across the ice. you turned backwards and put your left leg out, turning into a camel spin, both your arms placed straight out to your sides. bringing your leg back down for an upright spin, putting an abrupt stop to the turn you jut out your right leg for the hockey stop. just as you thought you had gotten it, you fell back onto your palms. sitting back down and heaving out another sigh, you were ready to give up for the day. just as you were ready to go, you heard the doors to the rink being opened. you turned to see Suguru walking onto the ice. falling out and splaying yourself along the ice you groaned quite dramatically. 

“get up.” he stood over you. 

“i told you to go away.” you looked to him, one eye closed as the light shined in it. 

“i told you i was going to help.”

“i don’t need your help. i’m done.” you sat up, getting on your knees to stand up fully. Suguru grabbed your arm pulling you up and into him. “can you get off of me?” instead of responding, he started skating to the opposite side of the rink, dragging you along with him. once you reached the corner, he let go. 

“show me.” he gestured to the rink. 

“yeah, i’d rather not.” you were going to walk away but he grabbed you and turned you towards the open space of the rink. 

“you want to get it down right? show me.” his voice was soft as he spoke to you. you contemplated for a second. you could leave and go home or you could get help from the person who inspired the move. going home seemed like a really good option. getting into position, you started skating before doing just as you had done before, camel into an upright spin and full hockey stop. once again tipping over and landing on your ass. “like i said, you’re putting too much weight on your back foot, that’s why you keep falling back. and you can’t just stop, it’s too much force, you need to build up some sort of momentum so there’s something to combat the weight of your body.” his arms were crossed over his chest as he spoke to you, muscles bulging even through his black shirt. you were staring at the veins in his hands before you quickly brought your eyes up to his then looked away. 

“sure.” taking up your spot next to him you did as he said, once again a camel into an upright spinning and once your right foot met the ice again, you gave yourself a slight push before coming into the hockey stop. this time you didn’t fall onto your ass, landing on one of your knees instead. slightly better. 

“you’re not compensating enough for your own weight, look.” Suguru started his own skate and turned into a spin, not exactly an upright one but close enough. as the turn came to a close, he pushed himself forward again, quite harshly, before stopping. “see, you need a counter for yourself. just stopping isn’t enough to carry you. now you do it.” this time when you did it, following through with an extra push, you didn’t fall. instead you had tripped forward and bumped into the wall. “now you’re putting too much weight on your front foot. you need to find a balance. do we have to run first year training drills?”

“i’m not some freshman, Geto. i know what i’m doing.” you snapped. 

“do you?” you stared at him quizzically before giving up. 

“nevermind. i’m done.” walking away you headed to the door. 

“wait.” you paused. “i- i don’t mean to be rude or anything. i’m actually trying to help.”

“you think you’re gonna help by demeaning my skill set? i’m captain for a reason.”

“i’m not trying to. i’m captain too, remember?” 

“we play two different sports.”

“yeah, and you’re trying to perfect one of my moves. let me help you.”

“i can do it by myself.” you turned to face him. 

“i’m not saying you can’t. but i know it pretty well and i can show you how to do it.” you stared at him blankly. “listen, if… if i help you get this right, you can teach me some moves from your team.” that got your attention. 

“really?” 

“yeah.” you slowly skated to him. 

“ok.” for the next hour, Suguru had shown you how to incorporate a hockey stop into your routine. you had finally gotten to a point where you didn’t fall at all. the move could use a little work but it was way better than what you had before. once you had finally gotten it, you were so excited you jumped with glee, somehow making your way into Sugurus arms. his large arms had wrapped around you as you hugged him. when you noticed where you were, you immediately backed out of his embrace. 

“sorry.” 

“it’s fine.” you began to slowly skate backwards. 

“i should go now, it’s pretty late.” your voice came out quietly and you pointed behind you. Suguru began to skate toward you. 

“or, we can stay, practice a little longer?” 

“i- um, i don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“why not?” he was in front of you. you had skated yourself so far back and somehow, into a wall. 

“cause.”

“because?” there’s a small space left between your bodies and Suguru had reached forward, pulling you into him, he leaned down, inching his face closer to yours. “because what?” he whispered against your lips. 

“cause- um,” he pressed himself closer to you, torso to torso. “cause-” you didn’t get to finish your sentence as he gently pressed his lips to yours. you sighed into his mouth as your lips met. you wrapped your arms around his neck, falling into him as you breathed him in. he deepened the kiss, parting your lips with his own and sliding his tongue against yours. you moaned into his mouth and he groaned against yours. suddenly, reality hit you and you pulled away.  “what is wrong with you?”

“huh?”

“don’t act dumb, Geto, oh my God. i- i can’t.”

“can’t what?” you pressed a hand to your forehead and began to skate away. 

“what are you gonna tell your girlfriend?”

“girlfriend? i- i don’t-”

“what?” you turned back to him. “she doesn’t have to know? don’t give me that.”

“Y/N, what fucking girlfriend are you talking about.”

“Yari!” you exhaled, exasperated. 

“Yari’s not my girlfriend.” 

“so you’ve been doing this with her too? what, you fucked her in the locker room like you did me? does your girlfriend know about her-”

“i don’t have a girlfriend!” he yelled over you. 

“then why do i always see you with Yari?!” 

“see me with her? i’m never with her.”

“yes you are, Suguru! you’re always with her! i see you parading around campus with her, walking her to class, sitting out on the quad with her. she- she comes to practice talking about you.” you began picking at your nails. 

“i-” he didn’t know what to say, you’re right, he’s always with her. it’s not his choice, she just follows him around everywhere. he told her to leave him alone last week but she swore they had something special, that she loved him and knew he loved her too. talk about delusional. 

“so i’m right?” you scoffed. deciding to exit from the conversation, you began to skate to the exit. Suguru quickly caught up, grabbing your hand, he turned you to him. 

“you’re wrong.” you just stared at him, a glazed over look in your eye. “she’s not my girlfriend. yeah, ok, we did something but that was it. i fucked with her for a while but i told her i didn’t like her, she just- she won’t leave me alone. i don’t have a girlfriend, at all. i don’t want one.”

“so what’s this supposed to be?” you gestured between the two of you with your free hand. 

“i didn’t mean it like that.” 

“then what did you mean?” 

“Satoru’s having a thing tomorrow night,”

“i don’t do parties.” 

“it’s not a party,” he rushed out. “Satoru said it’s just a little get together with some friends. can you stop by? maybe we can talk then?” you wanted to say no, there’s nothing to talk about but your mind didn’t have time to catch up with your body. you were nodding your head before a word could be muttered. “ok.” he let go of your hand, it was then that you realized your fingers were intertwined.

 when you finally got back to your room that night, you screamed into a pillow. every pent up emotion that was building inside of you from spending so much time with Suguru escaping as you yelled. you couldn’t believe you let him get to you, again. and you can’t believe you agreed to meet him tomorrow night. what was wrong with you. 

----------------

the next day flew by, your classes went by smoothly, Suguru staring at you from across the room in the ones you had together. practice was a little rushed, it was a friday and a break was coming up, everyone was excited to get out. now you sat in your dorm, staring at your phone as the time ticked by. it was 7:23, Suguru never gave you a time to show up. what time were you supposed to come? were you already late? would he be mad? you sat for another hour, finally leaving the comfort of your room and heading across campus to the frat house. 

walking up to the house, lights were flashing and music was booming. people were sitting outside, all huddled up because of the cold, passing around a blunt. “so much for a ‘small get together.’” you muttered to yourself. approaching the front door, you walked in and were immediately hit with the smell of a college party. sweaty bodies jumped and rubbed against each other, others were making out somewhere in a corner. looking over the area, you tried to spot his tall stature and black hair. when you didn’t see him you moved into the crowd. walking through the people and moving to the kitchen, you grabbed a water bottle before going back to searching around. after searching for a while, you gave up, finding one of his frat brothers instead. “have you seen Suguru?” he looked you up and down before responding. 

“you that crazy bitch?”

“huh?”

“you that crazy bitch?” he said, more pointedly. 

“what crazy bitch?”

“what’s her name? um, she’s on the figure team.”

“Yari?” 

“yeah! that’s you?”

“i’m not Yari.” he squinted his eyes before shrugging. 

“upstairs, second door to the left. knock.” that’s all he said before turning to walk over to a group of girls, they all looked at you weird before he approached them. going up the stairs, you almost made it to the top before you saw him. his broad stature leaned against a wall, hair tied back in a bun, his arms crossed over his chest as he spoke. he sat talking to some girl, eyes hooded as he looked at her, a smirk on his face. you stared at the two, her short brown hair falling to one side as she tilted her head. walking back down the steps, especially quiet so they wouldn’t hear you, you headed back to the kitchen. you leaned against the counter, gripping the sides. ok, if he wants to be all over every girl, you can be all over every guy. 

stomping out of the kitchen you looked around before making your way to the makeshift dance floor. you slipped in between the bodies, finding your way to the middle. settling into the people grinding on each other, you tapped the shoulder of some random guy, Haibara his name is, another brother of the frat, you asked if he wanted to dance. he looked between you and the girl he was dancing with before completely turning to you, letting out and enthusiastic, “sure!” you heard the girl mutter something before she walked away angrily. turning around, you pulled the boy closer to you, pressing your ass to his crotch, you heard a stuttered breath escape his lips. 

you placed his hands on your hips and swayed slowly, grinding against him to the beat of the song. you saw Suguru make his way down the steps slowly, one arm hanging over the shoulder of the girl, they laughed together loudly. out of spite, you dragged one of Haibara's hands up your body slowly. his breathing grew heavier behind you. you knew he was shy, one of the more reserved brothers of the frat. he only joined because Satoru and Suguru made Nanami join and by association, him. you felt bad, you weren’t sure what he was comfortable with and here you were making him feel you up. he didn’t seem to care though, pulling you closer and laying his forehead on your shoulder. Suguru saw you from across the room, eyes locking onto you and the figure behind you. you saw him whisper something in the girl's ear and she looked over too, she gestured to you and Haibara, Suguru kissed her forehead quickly and let go.

he quickly made his way over to you two. when he reached you, he grabbed your forearm and pulled you away from the brunette boy. “hey- oh! what’s up Suguru.” Haibara smiled. 

“nothing.” he dragged you along with him as he walked away, taking you to the steps. 

“let go of me.” you tried to pull away but his grip grew more firm. “Suguru let go-” he spun you around when you reached the first step pushing you up against the wall. people around stared for a while before going back to minding their business.

“Haibara?” he questioned, his nostril flaring as he breathed. 

“what?”

“i come downstairs cause someone told me you’re looking for me and i catch you fucking with Haibara?”

“why does it matter?” you rolled your eyes. 

“cause it fucking does.”

“but it doesn’t matter when it’s you though, right?”

“what are you talking about.”

“i go upstairs to find you and i see you laughing and giggling with some girl? the same thing with Yari. it’s cool when you do it, right?”

“some girl?” he stared at you for a second before he started laughing. 

“what’s so funny?” he continued to laugh, damn near hunched over now.

“aww, princess.” he stood back up, you glared at him. “you jealous?”

“jealous?” you said incredulously. “why would i be jealous of anything you do?”

“that was Ieiri, princess, my best friend.”

“oh…”

“yeah and i told you i don’t like Yari.”

“you don’t act like it.” was your quick reply. 

“ok.” he stepped back. “go upstairs.”

“for?” he stepped back into your personal space. 

“go upstairs, when i get up there i want you sitting down in just that pretty little set i know you have on for me.” he whispered in your ear. your face felt like it was on fire. 

“i- i don’t have on a set.” 

“i know you do, princess.” he walked away, going to the kitchen, before he passed the threshold he looked back to you, raising his eyebrow at you. you turned around and walked up the steps, going straight to his room. once you entered, you contemplated for a second, would you really do this? yes. you took off your shirt first, letting it fall to the floor, you fixed the cups of your pretty bra before unbuttoning your pants. you let them pool around your ankles before kicking them off. you sat on the bed, tucking your legs under yourself and placing your hands on your knees. you sat there for maybe two minutes picking at your thumbs. the door opened and you jumped a bit.

Suguru entered with two water bottles in his hands and something wrapped up. he smiled when he saw you sitting so prettily on his bed. you stood out against his dark sheets. the bright pale blue and pinks of your lingerie contrasting with his dark gray bedspread. “you look so pretty like that.” he sat the things in his hands down and walked over to you, cupping his hand under your chin and tilting your head up. he ran the pad of his thumb along your bottom lip, pulling it down and then letting it pop back up into place. he leaned down, pressing a kiss to your lips, it quickly grew messy, “open.” he murmured against your lips. you parted your lips, looking up to him with wide eyes. he let a glob of spit from his mouth fall into yours. “swallow.” he watched your throat bob up and down, you could taste the fruit punch he drank earlier. he tasted sweet. “sit back and spread your legs for me.” you looked up at him as he stood back up, leaning himself against his dresser. “you gonna do it or do i have to make you?”

you crawled up to his headboard slowly on all fours, he watched you, his cock twitching in his pants as he watched you ass sway side to side. he cleared his throat as you settled against his pillows. you spread your legs for him, watching him from across the room. “what do you want me to do?” you asked in a whisper. 

“i want you to fuck yourself on you fingers like you do when you think of me.”

“i-”

“what?”

“i don’t think of you.”

“come on, princess, we both know you do. why else would you get your panties in a twist when you see me with another girl?” you sighed, looking down at yourself. “pull those pretty little panties to the side and spread yourself open on your fingers.” 

“ok.” you whispered. your fingers twitched nervously, not sure what to do with him staring at you. 

“just pretend i’m not here, pretty girl, it’s ok.” you nodded your head. everything around you was so irrecoverably him, the sheets were soft against him and smelled like him, so warm. if you focused hard enough you could hear his breathing from across the room. closing your eyes you began to slowly trail your fingers down your body, hyper aware of your own touch. you dragged your fingers back up your stomach and to your chest, cupping your boobs through your bra. “take it off.” you obliged, quickly unclipping the offending garment and letting it fall off the side of the bed. “fuck.” you could hear the sound of a zipper and some shuffling. pinching your nipples you let out a soft sound, tweaking both of them between your thumb and forefinger. letting one hand trail down your body again, you dragged it down and began to run circles over your clit on top of your underwear. 

“Suguru.” you moaned softly. he groaned at the noise. you slipped your hand into your underwear, the stimulation sent sparks up your spine. dragging your fingers down to your hole, you circled it before slipping your middle finger in. you could hear a wet noise coming from where he is and the idea of him pulling on his cock to your fingering yourself pulled a moan out of you. slipping another finger into yourself, you moved them faster, the pads of them rubbing against your walls. 

“go faster. wanna hear it.” he panted. wanted to hear it..? oh. oh. he wanted to hear the sound of your wetness as you fucked yourself. your back arched as you fucked yourself faster. your other hand continued to tweak at your nipple. you moaned out as you felt your stomach clench.

“Suguru! i’m gonna cum!” your toes curled and you whimpered. you could hear his stuttered breathing and he jerked himself off. 

“let me see, pull your panties down.” he panted. your hand quickly moved to tug the gusset of your panties to the side. Suguru watched your fingers move in and out of you. his dream was finally coming true, the one girl he wanted was splayed out on his bed, fucking herself on her fingers, moaning out his name. his orgasm was building up quickly, he was going to bust everywhere from just watching you. you clenched around your fingers, mouth dropping open as you orgasm washed over you. you arched off the bed, moaning Sugurus name over and over again. he watched as you came, the way your essence dripped around and seeped through your fingers, how your chest raised and fell as you breathed heavily. Suguru groaned as he played with his tip, thumb running over it and you looked at him when you heard the noise. 

“Sugu,” you whined. “wanna see you cum,” his jaw dropped and a small noise escaped his lips. “please.” he came all over his hand and the floor. spurts of his cum falling from his tip and he groaned as he came. you’re gonna be the death of him. once he regrouped, he walked over to you, kneeling above you as he looked into your eyes. he grabbed your hand, bringing it up to his lips and taking the two fingers that were just inside of you and putting them in his mouth. you moaned as he sucked on your fingers and his eyes rolled to the back of his head. 

“you taste so good, princess.” your hand fell from his mouth back to your side. “wanna taste for myself, flip over.” you took too long to listen to him so he flipped you over himself. he had you on your hands and knees, back arched for him. he went behind you, watching your pretty pussy drip for him. “fuck.” he whispered to himself. one hand rubbed over your ass as the other pulled your panties down. you kicked them off completely and he sniffed them before dropping them off the bed. “count.”

“huh?” slap! one loud clap against your ass, you yelped out at the initial pain but it eventually turned into a pleasurable stinging sensation. 

“count.” he said more firmly. 

“one,” slap! “two,” slap! “three…” on and on he spanked you again and again. you counted all the way up to eleven before he let up. your ass stung from the spanking but the line between pleasure and pain was blurred. it hurt so bad it felt good. you whimpered when he circled his hands over your ass. before you could recognize what was going on, you felt a stripe being licked from your clit to your clenching hole. “Sugu!” you looked behind you to see him hunched over, sucking harshly on your clit as he spread your ass. another stripe licked up to your hole before he slipped his tongue in, you clenched around it, the cold metal of his piercing contrasted against the warmth of your walls and you swore you saw heaven. you shook as he fucked you with his tongue, falling onto your front your back arched perfectly for him as you pushed back against him. 

the sounds were obscene, you could hear his tongue working against you and him groaning into your pussy. you moaned when he landed another slap to your ass, he gripped and jiggled it against his face. “oh my- fuck!” you squealed. he tongue licked and prodded against your walls as he ate you out. your thighs began to tremble, toes curling as your legs shook. his mouth moved down from your hole to your clit and you felt two of his fingers prodding at your entrance. his thick middle and ring fingers stretched you open he slipped them into you. he sucked on your clit and pressed his long fingers into that one spot inside of you. you whined loudly and he fucked you open on his fingers. “S-Sugu,” you slurred. “Sugu i’m gonna cum..!” you squeaked. he continued to work at you and another orgasm was building up in you. you kicked your feet as you felt your orgasm approaching but this felt different.

the coil in your stomach wound up tighter, you felt a pressure on your bladder and you trembled. you reached behind you blindly, grabbing Sugurus head and tangling your fingers in his hair. you felt him moan against you as you did so. “Sugu s-stop, i’m gonna pee.” you whined. he kept going, he either didn’t hear you or didn’t care but either way, he wasn’t gonna stop. “Sugu, wait!” he sucked harder at your clit and pressed his fingers into your g-spot. your toes curled as your back arched and you screamed out. your eyes rolled to the back of your head and all you saw was white. all you felt was your body shaking and wetness dripping down your thighs. your legs trembled at the earth-shattering orgasm and you whined and trembled at every touch you felt. Suguru moaned and groaned behind you, getting absolutely soaked as you squirted all over him and his bed. “Suguru!” you cried out, your feet kicked as he kept going. 

“one more, just give me one more princess, i know you can.” you sobbed as he went back to sucking on your clit. another orgasm was building up quickly, your entire body shook as he sucked and prodded at you.

“Suguru,” you cried out. “i can’t.”

“yes you can, i know you can.” he muttered against you. tears were streaming down your face, you shook and trembled with every pass of his tongue. your one hand gripped his hair as the other gripped the sheets. the next orgasm came quickly and you cried out as it took over your body. his bed was almost completely soaked through because of you. the essence of your orgasm streaked down your thighs. he let go of you, sitting back on his knees and your body relaxed. you fell against the sheets, they stuck against your body because of how soaked they were. he watched you take deep breaths, your body slowly calming down. you could feel some shuffling behind you and hear the sound of fabric ruffling. you felt the weight of the bed shift, Suguru leaned above you, trailing kisses up your spine.

you felt his weight against your back as he laid on top of you. he kissed and licked at your neck, breathing into your ear. he took all his clothes off, he laid completely naked on top of you, his bare chest pressing against your back. you could feel everything, every outline of his abs against your back, you could also feel his cock pressing into your ass. grabbing his dick he ran his tips through your folds, collecting your wetness and smearing it along his cock. he pushed your left leg up, spreading you open for him and lifting your ass up so he could slip in easily. he pressed his tip into you, slowly slipping in your walls. you whimpered as you felt him throb within you. “oh, fuck.” he sighed. “you feel so fucking good.” he moaned, resting his head in your neck. you pushed back against him, pressing your ass flush against. he whined into your neck, “you’re gonna kill me.”

“move, please.” 

“i can’t.” you got a flashback to the first night he fucked you. “i’ll cum.” 

“please, Sugu. please.” you begged. 

“ok.” he nodded, “ok.” he thrusted once and whimpered. he built up a steady rhythm, small noises fell from his lips as he fucked himself into you. “so fuckin’ tight, you’re so fuckin’ tight.” he fucked into you harder, the sounds of skin on skin bouncing off the walls of his room. “so much better than those other girls.” your body jerked and you looked behind you. “don’t worry princess, i’m not saying it to make you jealous.” he chuckled. “never had somebody like you, so fuckin perfect. you’re perfect y’know that?” when you didn’t respond he stopped moving. “answer me.”

“yes daddy!” you whined. his eyes crossed and his cock twitched deep within you, he never thought you were one to call somebody daddy, never took you as the submissive type at all. he leaned down over you. 

“good girl.” he groaned into your ear. “good fucking girl.” he started moving again, fucking you deeper. his tip nudged your cervix each time from how deep he was and the pain added to your pleasure. you were damn near fucked dumb, any train of thought you had completely gone, all you could focus on was Suguru fucking you. you tightened around him, your orgasm building up in your lower stomach. “fuck, are you close?” you nodded your head. “you gonna cum for me, princess? make a mess all over me, yeah?” one hand trailed down your body, fingers playing with your clit and pushing you closer to the edge. you gripped the sheets hard, you swore you could hear the seams ripping. 

“i’m gonna cum, Sugu!”

“hold it.” you shook your head. “you can hold it for me, i know you can.”

“i can’t, i can’t!” you sobbed. “i can’t, daddy, i’m gonna cum, please let me cum.”

“i said ‘hold it,’ right?” your body tensed up completely, your legs locking around Suguru from behind. before you could stop yourself, you were creaming around him. you cried out as you came, eyes crossing and rolling to the back of your head. you squeezed so tight around him he almost slipped out. he groaned as you clenched around him, his face was completely red, eyes hooded as he watched you cum around him. “i thought i told you to hold it.”

“i couldn’t do it.” you sniffled. “‘m sorry daddy.”

“aww, it’s ok baby.” he tucked some of your hair behind your ear, looking at your face. tears stained your face, mascara running down your cheeks, he smiled at you. 

“want you to cum, daddy. want you to cum in me.” he groaned at your words, his cock twitched violently inside of you. he completely covered you, laying on top of you and matching his body up with yours. his arms wrapped around you, pulling you flush against him. he began thrusting into you again, building up a fast pace, chasing his own orgasm. 

“i’m gonna cum, right in this pretty little pussy and you’re gonna hold it all inside you. then, you’re gonna walk around the house with it all in you, let everybody know that i did it, let everybody know i’m yours.” let everybody know i'm yours. he wants to kill you. his pace began to falter and he gave a couple of more thrusts before stilling above you. he moaned into your ear, quieting himself by biting your neck. you felt him fill you up, rope after rope of his cum filling you up. you moaned with him, another orgasm taking over your body. Sugurus' body twitched as he came, he sighed out as his orgasm finally passed over him. he relaxed into you, falling on top of you. 

“you’re heavy.” he laughed at you, sliding out of you and laying down next to your side. you turned your head to face him, he was already staring at you with a small smile on his face. “what?” your voice was hoarse. 

“you’re so pretty,” he said quietly. you looked down before looking back into his eyes. 

“thank you.” you whispered. he got up quickly, pulling on his boxer briefs, you sat up, covering yourself with your arms. “where are you going?” 

“nowhere.”

“are you leaving?” you asked shyly. 

“no, Y/N/N, i’m not leaving.” he walked over to his dresser, grabbing the two water bottles and whatever was wrapped up in the foil. making his way back to the bed, he sat down next to you. “here, drink something, it’ll help your throat.” he opened the water bottle for you. you took it from him and sipped from it slowly. he unwrapped what was in the foil - a sandwich. “eat this.” you took the sandwich from him and ate it. he watched you, he turned over to his nightstand - it was then you noticed the dragon tattoo displayed on his back - he grabbed some wipes and began unpacking them. he wiped the smeared mascara off of your face and wiped some crumbs from the corner of your mouth. “can i?” he gestured to you. you raised an eyebrow at him. “wipe you?”

“oh, you don’t have to.” 

“yeah but i want to.” 

“ok.” you laid back and opened your legs for him, he got in between them with a new new wipe. 

“can you push it out for me?”

“thought you wanted me to keep it all in.” 

“just do what i say.” he looked up at you, he looked so good between your legs like this, you’ll have to get him between them like this again. 

“yes, daddy.” you rolled your eyes. sighing, you tried your best to squeeze all of his cum out of you. he watched it flow out you in thick globs.

 “fuck.” he leaned down, licking at you quickly.

“Sugu!” your thighs closed around his head. “don’t do that. ‘m sensitive.”

“sorry, princess, you just look so good.” he smirked at you. he cleaned you up gently, getting up and searching through his drawers for a shirt and passing you one of his old gray tees. he picked you up and carried you out of the room, you hadn’t even noticed the party had stopped. carrying you to the bathroom and setting you on the sink he grabbed an extra toothbrush and any other thing he thought you would need. “i’m gonna go change the sheets real quick. you can come back to the room when you’re done.” he pecked your lips before exiting the bathroom. you got ready to go to bed, brushing your teeth and washing your face. you dried your hands and left the bathroom. you trekked back into his room, there he sat on the edge of it, scrolling on his phone. he put it down at his side and gestured for you to come over to him. when close enough he grabbed your hips and pulled you to him. 

“did you um- did you dry the wet spot?” you asked, embarrassed. his hands rubbed up and down your thighs. your own hands played with the hair at the nape of his neck, his bun was looser now, more hairs framing his face. 

“wet spot?” he looked behind him. “oh.” he laughed. 

“what’s so funny?” you froze.

“waterproof liner.” you looked at him questioningly. “spilled some shit on my bed once, couldn’t get the stain out so i bought some waterproof liners. do you want to lay down?”

“um, no.”

“why not?”

“cause i should go. y’know, it’s late and i don’t want my roommate-”

“you don’t want to stay here.”

“what? no. that’s not- i’d love to stay.”

“so why don’t you?”

“cause i don’t want you to get tired of me.” 

“tired?” you looked down awkwardly.

“i know how this goes, Suguru. i don’t want to stay only to be embarrassed later.”

“i wouldn’t embarrass you-”

“you can’t promise me that.”

“yeah, i can. do you- do you not see how much i care for you?”

“care?”

“i don’t want anybody the way i want you. never have. you make me… you make me feel good.”

“oh-”

“not like that. yeah, you make me feel good.” he chuckled. “but i just, i don’t know, i like the way you look at me.”

“how do i look at you?”

“like you care for me too. i like that. it makes me feel like i mean something.”

“everybody thinks you mean something.” you rubbed at his scalp and he felt shudders down his spine. 

“yeah but it’s different. everyone cares cause they think i can do something for them, y’know. it’s fake but when it’s you, it feels right.” your face burned at his words and you looked down shyly.

“oh.” you giggled. 

“oh?”

“i didn’t think you liked me like that.”

“why wouldn’t i?”

“cause you’re mean.”

“i am. i’m sorry.”

“you’re sorry?”

“yeah, i just, i didn’t know how to tell you i like you.”

“so you were practically a bully?”

“i guess.” he shrugged and laughed. 

“how backwards is that?” 

“i’ll have you backwards.” he smirked. 

“what does that even mean?!” you laughed. 

“wanna find out?”

“huh-” before you could finish, Suguru wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you down to the bed next to him. you fell in a fit of giggles and he laughed along with you, silencing you with a kiss. the rest of the tight was spent with shared laughter, kisses, and fingers tangled together. it felt nice, you weren’t used to this side of him. he fell asleep before you, his head resting on his own pillow while one arm stayed on your stomach. you stared at him, watched his eyes flutter under his lids and the way his lips parted as he breathed. you tucked some hair behind his ear and pressed a kiss to his cheek, snuggling into his side, you let sleep overtake you and it may have been the best sleep you’ve gotten in a while. it just felt right to be in his arms. 

----------------

for the next week you were either in Sugurus' room or somewhere out on the town with him. he kept you fed, hydrated, and full of dick. there were marks up and down your body from him, bites, hickeys, scratches, you had them all. all the brothers of his frat gave you a knowing look whenever you left his room, always in one of his shirts. when he took you out, Suguru made sure to always take you to places you’d never been before. which was pretty easy seeing as you spent most of your time cooped up in your dorm or in the rink. you’d found a new favorite diner, they had the best fries and milkshakes. the first time Suguru had watched you dip your fries into your vanilla shake, he stared at you in disgust. you’d forced him to try it, he had a whole fit before you stuffed his mouth with the fries. he shut up after a while and agreed that it wasn’t that bad, he wouldn’t tell you he actually liked it.

eventually Satoru had found out when he just walked into Sugurus room only to find him balls deep inside you. Suguru yelled at him to get out, throwing a shoe at his head. Satoru quickly slammed the door but not before he let out a wolf whistle at the sight. you were mortified, vowing to never show your face to Satoru again. that was in vain as the next morning at breakfast he had walked into the kitchen and stared at you for a while before exiting and making his way back upstairs. Suguru made sure his best friend would never mention it to you again, knowing how embarrassed you felt to be found in such a vulnerable position. 

you sat in Sugurus bed scrolling on your phone while his T.V played a random show in the back. he laid next to you asleep, tired from running around from errands all day. he stirred awake, rubbing at his eyes and looking at you. “g’mornin’.”

“Sugu, it’s one p.m.” you snickered. 

“oh. good afternoon.”

“hi.” you giggled. “do you wanna-” there was a knock at the door. Suguru went to get up but you grabbed his bicep. “i got it, lay back down.” you went to open the door. turning the knob, a familiar voice broke through the threshold before you could get it all the way open. 

“Geto, have you seen Satoru-” Bri paused as she stared at you. “no fucking way.”

“oh. hey Bri.” you chuckled awkwardly. 

“you’re such a fucking hypocrite.”

“what?”

“i can’t see Satoru but you can fuck his best friend.” the anger was obvious on her face. 

“i didn’t- i don’t-”

“are we fucking serious right now? you’re gonna lie about it. i thought you were a bitch but this is low even for you.”

“i- i never told you you couldn’t see Satoru and we’re not just fucking-”

“just shut up. you practically shouted how much you hated the idea of me and Satoru together. were you jealous? is that what it was? you were mad because i actually had him and you wanted his best friend? when he’s over you next week, don’t come fucking crying to me.” Suguru jumped up from his bed and stormed over to the door. 

“watch your fucking mouth when you’re taking to her.” your breathing stuttered and tears built up in your eyes. “no ones fucking jealous of you, i don’t even know why she’s friends with someone like you. Satoru doesn’t fucking like you, he told you that but you keep coming back here cause you think you can change his mind. let me tell you something, no matter how many times you fuck him, it’ll never change.” he stepped closer to her. “all he sees you as is something to nut in, that’s all everybody sees.” her eyes flickered all over his face. “go some fucking where before you embarrass yourself.” he slammed the door in her face and turned around to you. he saw the tears falling down your cheeks and immediately pulled you into him, wrapping his arms around you. “i’m sorry. i don’t know what her problem is, she was out of line.”

“it’s fine. she’s right.” you sniffled out. 

“how is she right?” he pulled away from you. 

“i am a hypocrite.” you cried. “i told her you and Satoru are dicks and then she finds me with you. it’s wrong.” 

“hey, hey.” he cupped your face and made you look up at him. “it’s not wrong, you’re right, me and Satoru are dicks but that doesn’t mean she can just talk to you like that.” you looked down to the floor, closing your eyes. “look at me. she’s the one whose jealous. she’s jealous because she knows Satoru doesn’t like her and you’re here with me. she wants to be you, that’s it. don’t listen to her, ok?”

“ok.” you whimpered. 

“how about a nap, yeah. sleep and when you wake up we can get milkshakes and fries.” you nodded and let him pull you down to the bed. 

----------------

it took a while for you to cheer up after the situation with Bri. Satoru had stopped talking to her completely after Suguru told him what happened, he’d even apologized for letting it happen when it wasn’t his fault at all. now, you sat on the sides of a rink at a major competition. the TMTC figure skating team had won a spot in a regional competition, schools from four different states were coming to compete and whatever team won got a grant of 7,000 dollars to use to upgrade their schools ice skating rink, an unnecessarily large trophy that sat in a glass case across the rink, and the chance to go to nationals. your team had won the spot at the competition a while ago after winning gold against Kyoto college. while you belonged here, it was proven in the way you participated in the last comp, you were deep in your own head.

you made the team practice non-stop to ace the choreography, making sure everyone was on their a-game. you sat on the bench with your hands on your knees, hands tucked under your chin and one of your knees bouncing up and down. you were nervous, you’d never performed in such a large stadium before, let alone in front of so many people. 

Suguru sat in a chair not too far from the rink, close enough to see your features and how nervous you were. he wanted to go out on the ice and hold you, tell you it was ok and he knew you would win because he did. you got this far, you carried your team all the way to this comp, he had no doubt in his mind you would bring gold home. he hoped you knew that as well. your team was up next, two already went before you. it was your time to get ready and you led the team to the locker room. everyone was lacing up their skates in silence, the nerves bouncing off all the girls. once you finished tying your skates you stood in front of them all. 

“guys.” you started. “i know i’m not really good at the whole encouraging speech thing but i just wanted you all to know that i’m proud of us. we got all the way here, we made it this far because of our hard work. i don’t want y’all to put too much pressure on yourselves. no matter what we all joined this sport because we love it and it’s fun. we can have fun tonight, don’t let some competitions take the joy out of this. whatever happens tonight, whether we win or we lose, it’s fine. i won’t say i wouldn’t be disappointed if we lost but we got here. we worked our asses off and proved we belong. so when we go out there, i want y’all to show everyone who we are. we’re not just the TMTC figure skating team, we’re girls who all have our own personalities and joined this sport for different reasons. show them that.” everyone clapped and smiled fondly at you, standing up and huddling around. they called for your team on the loud speakers. “alright, this is our time, don’t take it for granted.” 

the team left the locker room and you headed out behind them. you all lined up along the ice and waited for your que. the song you had chosen began to play and one by one the line began to disperse. following the choreography you had come up with, the dance started slowly. every girl skated out into a step sequence, their movements following the tempo of the song. the music began to speed up and so did the moves, excluding you there was an even amount of girls on the team, so you paired them in twos. two girls were assigned to each other and executed the choreography together. they did a combination of moves supporting one another. you skated through them, sometimes grabbing onto their waists as they spun around to spin with them, crouching down onto your knees and tucking your head into your shoulders. 

the music became louder, the beat progressing and each of your moves becoming harsher, more restricted to display the emotion of the dance. you skated on one leg, through four of the girls, you placed one of your legs down, turning the move onto an upright spin and once you began to spin faster, two sets of hands grabbed your waist stopping you. your turn stopped abruptly, just as you stopped you broke free, skating away from them and towards one wall, just as you reached it, you fell to your knees, turning on them as the rest of the team approached you. they covered your body completely, all of their hands reaching to grab some part of you and just as they moved and light broke through the makeshift cover they made over you, they hoisted you into the air. not too high to the point you’d land dangerously, but enough so you landed and turned, one foot poured out behind you and hands displayed in front of you for balance.

the girls began skating to you quite fast, their moves harsh as they came at you, just before they reached you, they stopped. clasping hands and beginning the next part of the choreo you taught them. while everyone was distracted by their dance, you snuck off into a corner, sitting and waiting for your que. you sat for a minute before your que came up. the girls were lined up once again, like they were when the dance started. they all had their backs turned to you. the music grew again, reaching its crescendo. skating to them, one by one from each row they all turned to you, skating faster and lifting one leg in the air, you held your hands out behind you. bringing that foot back down and jumping, you turned in the air and landed on the opposite foot, now skating backwards, body swaying side to side. 

just as you saw the tip of someone’s skate just in your view - strategically placed for you - you brought that leg back down again, pushing yourself forward off the tip of your blade and turning around, you headed for the gap between the girls split directly in the middle. you began to spin again just as you reached the gap some of their hands began reaching for you but stopping the turn, you came to a full hockey stop, falling down into position for a hydroblade. four girls behind you fell dramatically onto another while others began to turn into a sit spin. you laid with your chest pressing against the floor, rising and falling into the ice as you panted. the music stopped abruptly, the rest of the girls falling out of their sitting spins onto the floor as well and for a second all there was was silence. all you could hear was your own breathing before the stadium erupted into loud cheers. claps could be heard all throughout the stadium, whistles and the thumps of people’s boots and sneakers as they jumped. 

relaxing and getting up from the ice you turned to the team, everyone was looking around the stadium at all the people clapping for them. from across the arena, Suguru yelled for you. he clapped so hard his hands were red. “that’s my fucking girl!” he goaded, he was so proud of you he felt like his chest could burst. he whooped and yelled for you as you and the team headed back to the locker room. he stood out against everyone else, 6’2” frame wearing all black with jet black hair cheering for some girl on a team wearing a bright pink tutu, it was almost comical. you and the team got undressed in the locker room, all dressed in TMTC tracksuits. you skated back to the rink to sit back on your assigned bench. there are three more teams after you. you had to sit through all of them before the results came in. 

the teams after you were so good, you clapped and cheered for them when they finished and it was finally the end of the night. the panelists had called for all teams to come stand in the rink as they announced the winners, the announcements began. people from within the stadium voted on who they wanted to win on the website on their phones, they picked who they thought belonged in first, second and third. the victors for second and third were announced and you let your head hang. you had at least expected third, your performance wasn’t like others, it took a more aggressive approach rather than the usual gentleness of figure skating. maybe you should have stuck to what you knew. preparing for the disappointment of a loss, you began slowly backing away from the team. 

“and the first place winner for this year's regional competition is…” silence overtook the audience. “Tokyo Metropolitan Technical College!” you paused, not exactly sure if you heard him right. the crowd broke out in applause, cheers damn near breaking the sound barrier. your team was already at the man with the trophy’s side. they watched you before they all yelled at you to come get your trophy. you skated over to them quickly, Reí held out the trophy for you to grab and as you took it, you fell to your knees. you cried as you held the trophy. the team stood over you, rubbing your back, thanking you for leading them this far. you cried harder.

leaving the large stadium with the large trophy on your hand, everyone behind you was yelling out proudly. some stragglers from the crowd congratulated you as you left. once you got to the parking lot, you saw Suguru leaning against his car. you tried your best to run over to him, placing down the trophy and crashing into him. his arms wrapped around you and lifted you into the air, your feet left the concrete and you wrapped your arms around his neck. “you did it.”

“i did.” you sobbed, so proud of yourself. 

“i’m so proud of you. i knew you were gonna win.” you cried into his neck. “you did so good pretty girl, you were the best.”

“you’re just saying that cause you’re fucking me.”

“no.” he placed you down, making you look at him. “that’s not why.”

“then what, Sugu?” he stared at you for a second before he turned around and opened his car door, grabbing something and hiding it strategically so you couldn’t see it. once he turned back to face you his ears were bright red and he huffed out a breath. 

“Y/N L/N, will you do me the amazing honor and accept me as your boyfriend?” from behind his back, he pulled a beautiful bouquet of purple and white flowers. your jaw dropped and you looked between him and the flowers. “you gonna answer?”

“yes!” you wrapped your arms around him again. holding him close to you. you pulled back and pressed a messy kiss to his lips, tongues and teeth clashing. “you’re so corny.” you whispered to him. 

“what can i say? you bring it out of me.” you laughed together. eventually he led you to the passenger seat, buckling you in and pressing kisses to your face. you stared at him as he got in the car. fondness all over your features, how lucky could you have been?

----------------

two months later you found yourself in the spot where everything started. back in the now improved locker room of your school, lacing up your skates to head to the ice. Suguru was waiting for you outside, sitting down staring out to the floor. approaching him from behind you tapped his shoulder. “come on.”

“what are we doing here?” 

“just come on.” you rolled your eyes. grabbing his hands in your own, you began to walk backwards to the ice, watching him watch you. now on the rink you pulled him closer to you, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him towards you. 

“what are we doing here?”

“why are you complaining?”

“cause,” he whined. “i wanna go back to my room and watch movies with my favorite person.”

“and who’s your favorite person?”

“Satoru.” he deadpanned, you hit his shoulder. 

“be serious.” he let out a hearty laugh. 

“ok but what are we doing here? it’s late.”

“you remember that one night you told me if i let you teach me the hockey stop, i could teach you one of my own moves?” he groaned and let his head fall back. 

“i thought you forgot about that.”

“i did.” you shrugged. “‘till i didn’t.”

“do we have to?” he pouted. 

“yes, now stop being a baby. it’ll be easy, i promise.” you led him to the middle of the rink and let go. “ok, watch me.” you began skating away, once far enough you put one leg out. eventually putting it down you turned back to your boyfriend. “easy, right?”

“sure.”

“now you do it.” he began skating forward but as soon as he put his leg up, he stumbled forward, quickly catching himself. you crouched over laughing. 

“it’s not funny, Y/N/N.”

“yes it is.” you laughed even harder, he huffed. “ok, ok, i’m sorry, try again.” he kept trying, sometimes stumbling. he complained a lot along the way, asking if you two could just leave. you wouldn’t let him give up, you kept pushing until he finally got it. 

“was there a point to this?”

“of course.” you skated from your spot to him, grabbing him and pulling him along with you. beginning to gain speed, you pressed your back to his and placed his hands on your waist. you leaned forward, kicking your leg out as you skated, Suguru watched and knew what you wanted him to do. he did just the same as you, your bodies lined up together and you skated around half the rink like that. putting your leg down to stop you looked at him. “see, i had a point.”

“yeah but my point is better.”

“you didn’t even make a point.”

“yeah i did.”

“then what’s your point?”

“this.” he grabbed your jaw between his hand and planted his lips on yours. he parted your lips with his own and slipped his tongue into your mouth, you moaned around him. cupping the back of your head, he slowly inched you down until you were both lying on the floor. he kissed from your mouth to your neck, unbuttoning your shirt slowly, he trailed his fingertips along your body. his hands ran along the hem of your skirt before he slipped it under the garment. his finger circled your clit and slid down to your entrance. he circled it and felt you flutter before he slid one into you, you moaned when he entered another. you were so wet, soaking his entire hand as he fucked it in you, he stopped just as you felt your orgasm approaching. 

“hey!” you whined at him. 

“i know, i know. i’ll make it up to you.” he began suckling small marks into the skin and trailing them down your body. leaving kisses down your body as you heaved at the affection. he licked into your belly button before looking at you. “you’re so pretty.”

“you tell me all the time.”

“just making sure you know.” he leaned down to unlace both your and his skates and threw them somewhere across the rink. his hand slithered up your thigh and he gripped the stockings you were wearing under your skirt. “these are so dumb.” before you could reply, you heard the loud rip of the fabric.

“Suguru!” you yelled at him, “i have to wear these out of here!”

“it’ll be fine.”

“they’re my favorite pair.” you pouted. 

“i’ll get you some more, ok?”

“fine.” he moves down your body once more, now coming face to face with the wet spot on your panties. he ran his finger over and pushed into your hole slightly, collecting more wetness on the fabric. he pulled your panties to the side. he breathed against your skin, your pussy fluttering as you felt it. he licked your clit, his piercing running over it quickly. he dove straight into it. wasting no time he began eating at you like a man starved. your back arched off the ice, fingers tangling in his hair, you pulled on it roughly and he moaned into you. you guided his head up and down in you, his tongue dragging over your clit, his piercing rubbing over it. he looked up to you and the sight above him was beautiful, your mouth was dropped open and your chest was arched off the floor. one of his hands began to run circles over your hole, he slipped two fingers in you. you moaned as his fingers rubbed your walls, his tongue piercing rolled over your engorged clit and your voice broke as you cried out his name. 

his fingers began to fuck into you faster and he went from licking your clit to sucking on it. an orgasm was building up quickly and you couldn’t fight it off. “Sugu, i’m gonna cum.” ever since the two of you got together, Suguru spent his time learning your body, learning what made you tick and twitch. your hips began bucking up in his face, his other hand came up to hold you down. his palm pushed you back against the floor, making sure you couldn’t squirm away from him. he sucked on your clit harder, your stomach clenched and your toes curled. “Sugu!” your things trembled and you cried as you came, you shook as Suguru kept sucking, his fingers stilled inside of you pressing into your walls instead.

“give me another.” he murmured softly, he began sucking on your clit again. you panted, gripping his head harder, pressing him more into you. you clenched around his fingers harder and before you could warn him, you were squirting all over his face. he gulped it down happily, drinking from you like he was a parched man and you a fountain. he sat up and smiled at you, your juices dripping from his chin. you sighed as he let up, body relaxing into the floor. “i love it when you do that.” 

“i don’t.”

“why.” he whined like a petulant child. 

“it takes a lot out of me. take your pants off.” he obliged, sliding them to the middle of his thighs.

“you’re bossy,” he joked. 

“you like it.” he nodded his head with a smirk on his face, he does like it, you’re the only person who can put him in his place. he lifted your legs and wrapped them around his waist, his body engulfed yours, wrapping his arms around and you cradling your head as his body bent over yours. he lined his tip up with your entrance. he groaned as he pushed into you, your walls fluttered around him and you took him inch by inch. you turned your head to him searching for his lips. “Sugu.” you whispered, he turned to face you and you pressed your lips to his. he began thrusting into you, your lips moved against each other, you sucked on his tongue and his eyes rolled back. his moan vibrated through your head, you took the ball of his piercing into your mouth, rolling your tongue over it and biting the metal playfully. 

“you’re so big.” you rested your head on the ice, your ass was pressed against it. the tights were ripped around your thighs, your panties pulled to the side rubbing against Sugurus cock as he fucked you. 

“you’re so tight,” he moaned. “fuck, i love you.” your eyes widened. that was the first time he ever said it to you. his thrusts slowed down and grew deeper, he went from slutting you out to fucking you passionately. “i love you.” he pressed his lips to yours, his hand that was cradling your head tangled into your hair, pulling at it to make you look at him. his tongue ran over your lips, opening them and sliding it into your mouth. you took a minute to kiss him back, your eyes stayed open as he kissed you. his pelvis rubbed directly on your clit and your eyes crossed. he cock continuously rubbed your g-spot, his tip nudged your cervix. you panted and moaned into his mouth, he breathed you in, soaking up every sound that escaped your lips. 

“i’m gonna cum.” you whimpered. 

“me too.” the kiss between you two grew sloppy, less of a kiss and more of a combination of tongues and slobber. everything was so wet, your face with his spit, your body with sweat, in between your legs with his precum and your arousal. “i’m gonna cum in this tight pussy, gonna fill you up. wanna watch you grow, watch your stomach get bigger causa me.” you moaned at his words, who knew Suguru Geto had a breeding kink? “tell me.” he bit your lip. “tell me you want it. you want my kids.”

“fuck, i want it.” you sobbed, back arching to his chest. 

“you want it? wanna be a mommy? gonna make me a daddy?”

“yes! gonna make you a daddy, want you to make me a mommy.” you slurred, words stringing together.

“you’re gonna be such a pretty mommy, princess, gonna have the cutest kids.” he lifted his face to look into your eyes. he gripped your chin, making you look at him. “look at me when you cum, keep your eyes open.” you tried but your eyes rolled back into your head. he landed quick gentle slaps to your face “open ‘em.” your mouth dropped open, you tried to tell him you were close but all that came out were garbled words. “i know, pretty girl, you’re so close.” he mocked. “gonna cum all over me? make a mess? let it go.” you cried out as you came, voice cracking from the volume. “there it is, let it out for me.” your legs shook with your orgasm, your back arched and fell with tremors. “i’m gonna cum.” his thrust faltered, one, two, three more before he filled you up. there was so much of it that you swore you could see your stomach expanding with each rope. 

“Sugu, there’s so much.”

“fuck, i know.” it seeped out around him, dripping from you down his balls. he pulled out of you, wincing as the coldness of the rink met his cock. he laid next to you, sprawling out on the ice. “i meant it.” you looked at him. “i know what you’re thinking, i meant it. i wouldn’t have said it if i didn’t.” you sighed with relief. 

“i love you too.” he smiled so wide you thought it would stick to his face. “did you mean the other thing?”

“what? making you a mom?” you nodded. “fuck yeah.” he laughed. “you’d look hot as a mom.”

“Suguru!”

“what?! you would. and i’d get to watch it. getting hard jus’ thinkin’ bout it.” 

“you’re gross.” your face turned up jokingly.

“maybe but it’s more than that. i want that with you, i want kids with you, wanna have everything with you.” 

“i want it too.”

“really?”

“yeah but it might be too early right now.” you turned on your side, laying your head on his chest. “how about… meeting my grandfather next saturday?”

“ok. is he gonna kill me?”

“probably.”

“fuck.”

----------------

THIS TOOK FOREVER!! i was supposed to have this out weeks ago but it's out now! i hope you enjoyed. likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

@shadowthief78 @alittlepuppyslut @leave-rae-alone @sugurusprettygirl @kissyblake-uwu @blubearxy @moonlithavensworld @deanzelly @xxharumixx @httpghostface @enhypen-scholarship @breeziebetty @3xv5s @iwannachokeontojifushiguroscock @ilovemydogsimon @jellyamour @secretanimesimp @literallynothingandnobody @morganadorodo @shiroganekagami @mmeerraa @lunairiki @saccharine-nectarine @deepinballs @boba-is-a-soup @localgaytrainwreck @bootlegroach @r0ses4ndlilies @shoyos-sugarbaby @sativaxc @spam-love @sh0rtccakee @onlypickless @nishii28 @missgab @anastasijaiwaizumi @strawberry-hyacinth @ynmnln @flrdete @megmercury @bforbiblio @hwanin @reinersweiner @childof-iluvatar @toijisdilfdaddy @doniveatry @cursedwings2005 @liaurokodaki @vixensbrainrotts @pillowow @beelzmunchkin @idkkk343 @xoxohyuniin09 @fartzalot @ghostlillah @diiaicar @vampl-sh @bffrrufr @jay-mach @firstwarmdayofbluespring @svtkiss

[purseowner4thequalityanimation]

SMT Boardgame Kickstarter Smells Like Suspicious Fish

There's an SMT boardgame. Curb your enthusiasm, you shouldn't back it. And if you did, lower your pledge to like a buck until they clear things up, because as it stands it seems like an incredibly suspect product.

Checking through the Kickstarter comments and Japanese Tweets about the boardgame makes the entire thing seem poorly planned at best. I'll summarize as best I can;

The designer is incredibly infamous in the boardgame community

Naoki Matsunaga, a self-described "board game sommelier", is the designer. You'll find tweets lamenting that "the board game sommelier is involved". Why is he so hated? This thread goes into detail: co_boze on twitter. Part of it is they bashed Werewolf over one game they saw of it, another is they took on a kind of public-face role for boardgames appearing on late night TV shows to talk about them in ways that annoyed boardgamers. They seem to have designed a boardgame based on "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" which ripped off Sid Sackson's 'I'm the Boss". But it's what co_boze talks about next that's really bizarre. The game was apparently banned from most board game cafes and playing spaces. Seminars where people could play the game were hosted, but the venues that hosted these seminars all closed down.

If you keep looking through comments, you start finding claims that his company does multi-level marketing (ie pyramid schemes). To be honest, I don't know if this is true. But even if it isn't, it is really not hard to find people who know of this guy and would really really really REALLY prefer he was not involved.

"Oh fuck, it's THIS guy" is not a reaction that inspires confidence

2. Questionable development and presentation issues.

A regular collaborator with Atlus recently tweeted "The use of AI in Atlus works or derivative works is stictly prohibited." He responded to a reply asking if this was about a board game.

The staff running the SMT BG Kickstarter later clarified the actual -game- wouldn't use AI graphics... but from the looks of it, the promotional materials do.

Dig that... generic metal pipe aesthetic. Nothing screams MegaTen like black plumbing to nowhere.

In totally unrelated news, a board game manufacturer recently tweeted that a Kickstarter used their name without permission, and they're not sure why.

Quote tweets on the post would suggest it was the SMT board game. The comment they are loosely referring to is this:

In a follow-up post, they do specify "The product figures will be made of PVC." and "We will be manufacturing the games in partnership with a factory in China that has a proven track record... " "Figure director Kimura Yuzuru has over 10 years of experience..." and other boring development stuff that I have no issue with. What I do have issue with is how they can say things like they're "considering" which manufacturer to use and namedropping other companies that they're unrelated with. (While I was typing this post, they posted an update that clarified the CMON issue and literally nothing else: here.)

The boardgame is being presented with machine translated English printed on the same cards as the Japanese. But the actual game will have a translator check everything.

they hire translators to localize all game content

Additionally, there was a week long radio silence on the Kickstarter. For reference, Kickstarters are normally very active with the project planners dropping updates, responding to feedback and clearing up any concerns.

Some of the concerns were "How does the game actually play?", a question that would be best answered by dropping a rulebook for people to look at, or better yet showing them an entire run of the game. The SMT BG Kickstarter has boldly chosen neither. Devs have commented the game is on Version 11 and plays well, which makes it strange that they can't share any of it with anyone else.

Actually, when you compare this to how most Kickstarters are run, it becomes very clear the SMT BG Kickstarter is, uh, kinda failing in all possible regards. The first Backer Goal is "Jack Frost Dice" at 2000 backers (not funds raised, BACKERS). Despite getting 300%(!!!) of the initial pledge needed, there are no bonuses or unlocks.

Mind, this lack of information comes after they already delayed the start to supposedly improve Backer Goals and other aspects.

There aren't a shortage of issues - it's ICREA's first boardgame (but not their first tango with SMT; they made the SMT30th Logo, for instance.) The timeline seems totally wack. The staff have been incredibly slow to respond. Cards with tiny font and two languages printed on them. Etc, etc. Maybe individually these issues wouldn't be too concerning. But all of them combined make the product seem incompetently run at best, and at worst an actual scam.

I'm hardly a big influencer in the SMT scene (my biggest contribution is when that fucking succubus gif gets 36k likes on Twitter every 5 months) but I haven't seen any English speaking sources discuss this in detail, when there really should be at least some noise about all of this. Still. if just one of you end up saving 600 bucks on what ends up being a trashfire carcrash project because of this post, then that'll have made the past 30 minutes of typing this shit worth it.

[brainjvice]

Yapping about Kainess breakup

Kaiser was at his gentlest with Ness during his breakup and it was so fucked up for him.

Do I think it could've been worse? Yes. Do I still think it's still cruel for him to let Ness go this way? Absolutely.

See, Kaiser has never actually been nice to Ness: he was either mean or neutral towards him, calling him loser since day one (you have a way with words, Michael...).

The only other moment where Kaiser was "gentle" with Ness was in the hair cutting scene. I don't know how authentic Kaiser was being because we miss his pov. My theory about it is that it was some sort of last trial for Ness, to see if he really was the obedient dog that Kaiser spotted months (weeks?) prior.

It was less about trust and more about control. See how much Ness is willing to do for him. I think his first attempt for this was when he asked him to wash his hair in the shower scene. Kaiser was testing how much he could take from Ness without giving anything back.

He never planned to return Ness' "love", because Kaiser himself does Not see that as affection. It's something taken for granted, like the unconditional love you expect your dog to give you even if you neglect it.

Also Kaiser does not see Ness as a person, nor as something valuable. He does not see him "at his level", as a peer. Of course he would never want that type of love. Kaiser would probably feel love only if it's from someone he considers valuable. Someone he's at the same level on his imaginary hyerarchy.

On the other hand, we have Ness. Ness, who has poured his own whole identity into Kaiser. Kaiser is the centre of his world. The reason he is still playing football, his magic.

He's also someone he's projected onto like crazy.

Ness has never heard anything gentle come from Kaiser's mouth until that very moment. And then Kaiser shatters it all in the cruelest way possible.

I think the kindness he reserved to Ness was a vile way to let him down. See, if Kaiser had kept following his malicious pattern, for Ness it would've been easier to cope. But no, he chose to be kind and it's a slap right into Ness' face.

The words Kaiser deliver carry a double message. On one side, he's grateful for Ness, on another he's breaking up their friendship.

From Ness' pov, this is atrocious to witness. Because now what? Ness can be angry at Kaiser, hate him even, but he'd always feel guilty deep down, due to that sparkle of kindness Kaiser has shown to him.

I think I'd convey this sensation better using an example: imagine your (asshole) partner is breaking up with you and they do it by saying "I love what we had and you made me grow as a person, but I don't want you in my life anymore because I found someone else and it's different" or smt like that which makes you feel used. Like Ness gave everything to Kaiser, and Kaiser barely thanked him before moving on. Which leaves Ness with what? Nothing. Exactly. Not even an excuse to explode and be angry because of how "sweet" those words were for him. It's like Kaiser stunned him with a kiss before hitting him with a baseball bat. Like damn just use an axe next time jeez.

I think Ness will DEFINITELY have withdrawal symptoms after their separation is complete. Textbook withdrawal symptoms. Baby boy will struggle a LOT, and the fact he's all alone now? Without any support network? Damn.

Anyway from Kaiser's pov it makes sense and to him it's not even manipulative and he Is actually being kind. This is because, given that he sees Ness as a tool, he is just basically firing him from his job position. Like yeah you served me well but now I don't need you anymore so go serve someone else. Kaiser has no empathy nor shows any guilt and he's never attached himself to Ness as a person. To him it's like changing a pair of shoes, he's like "aw these don't fit anymore... anyway!" before discarding them away.

Is it cruel? Maybe. But given his backstory, his antisocial personality and his narcissistic traits... it makes sense for him to act this way.

((There's much more I could yap about but I'm gonna stop here and maybe make another post.))

[cozzzynook]

Idea!

Rodimus while with the habit of shirking his captain duties is actually pretty proactive in taking care of his crew

Like he loves his found family obviously (knows everyone’s name even cause he’s THAT good) so like short of paperwork (the horror) he’s willing to do a lot to make them happy

For example, the medics have been complaining about the quality of their supplies and Roddy overhears (or heard through Drift) and strings are pulled and the next time they restock on supplies they’re hooked up with a different and probably better supplier

Or gossip around the bar says there’s this big racing event on Velocitron coming up and people were talking about how they wish they could watch (like they’ve haven’t seen a race since before the war or smt) and suddenly their next pit stop for energon is conveniently Velocitron within the timeframe of the event

Brainstorm needs a super specific mineral but it isn’t high priority so he doesn’t ask for it? Tracked down and included in their next supply list. Crosscut needs a custom set piece for his next play? Set up for him on his stage within a week. Blaster wants to start a radio show on the intership comms (because let’s be honest they don’t use it that much)? Approved and green lit (mayhaps behind Mags’ back but he won’t find out until too late)

At some point people do start noticing but no one really acknowledges it you know?

There is however a secret Rodimus appreciation club (secret because they’re afraid of what it’ll do to his ego if he knew) because if Rodimus is taking care of everyone else, there should be people taking care of him

The founder may or may not be Thunderclash and Drift may or may not be super salty about that fact

Oh my gosh i love this idea!

Roddy really does a lot for his crew he just hates paperwork. It makes him break out in a viral rash, literally. Ratchet has never seen anything like it lol

I say he makes it up to Magnus by getting him books and poetry artifacts because Magnus is into that kinda stuff. He also makes it up to Megatron by doing his shifts often just not the paperwork lol and by sneaking the mech some high quality high grade and home cooked fuel that he made personally. Roddy’s a great cook and mixologist its just the stuff he makes will sneak up on you and its heavy engenx not for the light weights lol

For Ratchet he gives him a full week off every month with Drift of course. He’s fine picking up the shifts because he gets something to do and socialize. He also makes sure he keeps a good stock of Perceptors favorite fuel since the mech is with Brainstorm all day.

He even makes sure Whirl gets to let his rage out on old equipment or things they need to get rid of. The mech is a lot less violent since allowed to have a rage room of sorts. In fact a lot of mechs are leas violent since Roddy put the rage room in. He thanks swerve for his service and the idea by having Blurr on the ship for a solid week.

No one went near Swerves hab but the occasional metal clangs told them he was getting lucky. That and Blurr leaving his personal comm with Swerve covered in blue paint.

Roddy definitely doesn’t need to know about his appreciation club. Definitely not.

They do all wonder why Soundwave of all mechs greets Rodimus at the vacation planet he was mysteriously given tickets to and why the mech has a servo on his lower back leading him somewhere private.

[laylawatermelon]

Heartstopper Full Series Thoughts after each ep 😊

Spoilers below !! 👇🏾

Preface: my queer little heart adores this show and the ace rep in there!

After watching or TLDR: As a pan ace person inject this straight into my being as it's the queer rep we need and also a blessing to my eyes and heart every time.

I loved everything about it. The rest of the stuff down there is just my funny thoughts and a bit of philosophy and film analysis.

Ep 1

Ah yes my pan heart adores this show. Yasmin my heart beats for you endlessly. Tao..... U got it bro 🥲

The i love you scene is the sweetest thing I've ever seen.... I love love 😭😭

I hate crying to this show (hormones don't help 😭😭😭)

Tara and Darcy always love their storylines and complexities. Also their communication skills!

Ep 1 done!

Ep 2

Teehee the imagination scenes....

Ooh the i love yous

And the nick anxiety....

The title card was ominous

The color grading is beautiful though

Ah yes teenager angst

Also the co-parenting on tori???

Aw the little hesitancy from nick i get that babes 🥹

Eeee the teachers (lmao the cliche of teachers dating each other)

That tiny grandma car is insane

Rachel chinouriri!!!!!

Why's Tara upset about great grades ?

Awee nick and his little cousins

Ugh these imagination scenes are killing me

Ooh not the selfie

Ugh the aroace (and charlie and the food 😭)

I love the use of music in this series

Nick that's very specific (she's a psychiatrist she's gonna find out)

Darcy always speaking her mind i love it

😭😭😭Tori

Now you gonna put the straights on my screen 😤 (lmao very jk)

I love Elle's hair (not what I'm supposed to be focused on 🤣🤣)

Oh lawd Isaac

Lmao tori (her: i don't got time to learn them kids names)

I love Isaac's honesty and i just love Isaac

Platonic love for the win !!!

Oh i thought he was watching something savory 😏 but it's the same colors as the diagnosis website 😟

Twas right

Eheh something else

Smt lmaooo it wasn't savory time actually

Ohh the anxiety behind being left behind makes sense with tao

Communication 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

This couple pleases my eyes

I LOVE YOU RAHHHHHH

A gay person like me shouldn't be this happy i feel like im going to burst (rahhhhhh)

🌈🌈🌈

Charlie 😭😭😭

CHARLIE 😭😭😭😭😭

Nick you're probably worrying your aunt

Jeez kit and 16 year old in the same sentence made me giggle a bit (i just realized he's like 2 years younger than me 😭😭😭😭 i feel ancient)

Tara's nails are really pretty

I love his aunt + the message given

Ep 2 done!

Gotta get into the soundtrack as always!

Ep 3

I get it now... This show has the classic teen movie intros that's what makes it so special

Kit/Nick is just massive

Don't think Tara wants to have extra responsibility ?

Yay more queers !!! Always good to see the fam (Elle's crew)

Oooh secret relationship with the teachers ahhhhhhh

Yay more gays!

The coach 😂😂😂

Ugh. Hi. Hi. Aghhhhhh !!!

Ugh homophobia 🙄

Oop thought they were gonna get in trouble with the teachers

Ooooh (this is how to win a time war bigolas iykyk)

Oohh Charlie like mmmm clock it

Ugh the bullying was horrible and it did big damage to his mental health 😭

Ewwww they said i love each other 😊😊😊😊😊

Lmao Tori

His jumper is really nice i want it 🤗

Hooray animals (zoos are ehhhh though)

Is Darcy nonbinary? (I don't think she was in the comic but i might be misremembering)

Oooh Isaac babes this isn't the right time 😔

Oop charlie snapping

Tao and isaac are both immature i love it (like siblings)

Tao is like okaaayyy i see ittt

Lmao sahar and imogen

Coming out scene ! Aw the cute am i gay quiz (i failed every one i took by the way)

Ohh tao caught on 😟

The i love yous are killing me

Lmao i give you the gift of your clothes back 🤣🤣

Ughh he got the cute jumper i love (the pink it calls to me!)

The ILOVEYOU !!! (im sorry I'm obsessed)

I love the communication 💕 I'm also sobbing 😭😭😭

Tori 😭😭😭

Ep 3 done!

They did a really good job with the scene at the end and talking about mental health

Also i could relate to charlie a bit with the control thing and repeating thoughts/ocd intrusive (im good though! It's really mild and barely appears unless stressed or something)

Ep 4 start!

Yeah journaling!

The bi and lesbian unite!

Ugh Charlie 😭😭😭

The trees growing out of the corner is beautiful

Not this song 😭😭😭😭

Nick was so good 😭😭😭😭

Oh lawd boutta crash a car

Awww his friend are so cute

Ugh Tara's nails are iconic

Oooh say CAAAPPP (tain America ) 🎶caaaappp🎶

Is that Billie eilish i hear ?

Is Nick okay ???

Lmao sahar and imogen?????

This party is hilarious

I thought Tara was gonna be the one to help but it's interesting that it's tao

Awwww this is so sweet

Lmao the anger to marvel is hilarious (says Agatha all along actor)

Ocd + repeating thoughts (could relate)

Nick needs therapy too a little😔

Oh they're both journaling

I love the positive and normal rep of mental illness

Lmaoo Tori loves Nick 🤣🤣🤣 he has no idea (now that i think about it he's the only name she remembers)

I love the friendship and platonic love they emphasize

Aweeeee when they see each other is so 😭😭😭😭

Oh Isaac 😭 lmaoo messssyyyyyy

Ooh they darcy ! Shall be referring to them as such

I love the filming format

Yeah lmaooo messy taoooo

The huggggg!!

Love the mental health talks and everything

Christmas 👹 I LOVE CHRISTMAS

My babiessssssss back together again

I love the way that media depicts everyday life and can help people understand situations that may never encounter. Also the set design and lighting in this show are to top tier.

All hail queer works for having beautiful cinematography to display emotions and stuff. (Eg my beautiful man - eternal the movie especially, gameboys and sleep with me -ph short series)

Some suggestions (i should really do my queer works suggestions again im on the hunt for so much of them)

But anyways

Ep 5 lets go!!

Are we getting more Tori?

Lmao the bad tasting turkey

Hmm switch sponsorship goes crazy

Jeez

Is Oliver (former brother) now a cousin or something?

Lmao the gay question

Is that David????

Ugh

Ooop Nick cussing?

Ugh a front row seat to flirting in the group chat 🤣🤣

Sahar and imogen 😁😁😁😁

Ahhh tao and elleeeee

Oh tao and elle 😔

Omg the ignorance

Poor Tori 😭😭

Music is immaculate as always

Ohhhh whole family was there when they kissed (that's how he met them???)

Ohhhh okayyyy charlie and nic Nick hehehehe

The dawgggg

Lmao tao

😭😭😭😭 elle and tao are so 😭😭😭

Communication!!!!!!!

The dawgggg (again!)

Viral Queen elle

Aww Sahara 😔

Not rush (by troye sivan) In the bg show is queer all the way through 🙂‍↕️

Tai and elle the goofy couple that matches each other weird love it

Tao thinking about something else 😏

I love that she has another trans girl to talk to as she gets out

Jesus this guy -

Ahhhh the guy uhhh solitare ????

Tara's style is always amazing

Imogen and sahara !!! Vindication!!!!

Okay taoooooo elleeeee

I believe in love again after that kiss

I understand both Tori and Charlie with the argument they had. I just really feel bad for Tori.

I love the fact they talked about being trans and navigating sexual intimacy and things. It's so great. And that they have more than one platonic friend who's queer like them (elle has a trans girl friend, and Darcy talking to the other trans guy about exploring identity and gender affirming things to do and how it's supposed to be fun)

Ep 5 done!!

Ep 6 let's go!

Awww the rugby ladsss

Oh not cussing nickkkk ????

😔

Ooop okay plenty energy 🤣🤣

Trauma. Mhmm makes sense

This title card ain't looking too good

Elle's so talented

Ooh drummer boyfriend and the jock

Every time they kiss in school i have trauma

Lmao tao and Isaac so immature i love itt

Oh the mirror scene 😔

Lmaoo imogen diss

Nick please help the oblivious imogen

The cake is cute 🤗

Oh it's Michael he's so cute and awkward

I love the energy of all the core three being weird together

Aweeeee imogen and sahar 😞 but it's cute the conclusion they came to

Yeahhh oliviaaaa !! (soundtrack slaps)

I suspected the tara thing with pressure

Lmao he's a clingy drunk

I can't breathe - the tension -

I don't wanna be this person but ik their breath smell like hot garbage

Tori and Michael

Lmao Elle's dad

I don't know how i feel about this radio show

🤣🤣🤣 all of a sudden Nick gets it

Girl wtf are you talking and asking about ???

More thoughts about the whole thing at the bottom summary - i had to take a break cause 😤-

I took like 30 mins 😔

Lol nick getsss ittt

Oh no the body thing lmao mom is like no canoodling of any sense in my house

Oooh i want you that's craaaaazy

Doc said protection pleassee

Its a great message but my mind is like you WILL have confidence to bone your boyfriend and that in itself is beautiful 🙂‍↕️

This show gives me whiplash. Please give me a break. Sad. Sexy. Sad. Sexy. Extra sad. More sad.

I think I forget the ages the character represent and to get that whiplash into how messed up they use kids who just want to be themselves as talking points and not actually seeing them as people.

It brings up a really good point of how differences in queerness (or anything labeled as other) is no longer about individuals who exist but rather an idea to be imposed in them. But no more philosophy! Time for

Ep 7! Yay

Kit has the 'doe eyes in love' on lock beautiful performance

Nick ain't thinking bout nothing but that bodayyyy 🤣🤣🤣

Also Tara looks so at peace with dance

I love Tara and Nick's relationship 🤗

The journaling agenda

Omgggggg

Ooh Nick okayyyyy

Okay tao with the wisdom ew to the cucumber

Oh no now she's thinking about the politics

Let people liveeee pleasee

Nick said i been waiting on this !!!

Lmao David the panic Nick had

The dogs 🥰

Darcyyyyyy that's crazy

I live that they're displaying queer sex, normalizing it and not shying away from it being a normal and not fetishizing it (esp cause they're young and teens in shows usually are unfortunately overly sexualized or it's not shown to be intimate/delicate but rather more... Idk)

The other trans characters supporting Elle because they get it 😭

Nick has shalala playing in his head all the time looking at Charlie

I sense neurodivergence in Micheal (lowkey Tori as well but streets seem conflicted in the verdict for her ...)

Lmaoo the outrage in at school from Nick

Nick asks lesbian about gay sex perfect

I'm gonna cry Tara and Darcy, and all the coming out scene in this show (healing my heart one ep at a time 😭😭) one day it'll be me or I'll just pop out in rainbow with my queer af shows + books and no shame 🤷🏾‍♀️

Charlie and his teen angst

I can kind of understand his mom but honestly if someone wants to do something they will find a way to do it (+she's lucky he even tells her some people may just be sneaky about it)

Tao and elle are relationship goals 😭😭😭😭

Oh no Nick's pressure/anxiety

I love communication in this show 💕

Ooop not the sitting okkaayy charlieeee

Lmao to the mom

Nick said i been waiting for this !!

Oopp jessuese ! Hands handsssss

To mum: 🤷🏾‍♀️ he warned you at least you know it

Twas beautiful 🥹

Now the final episode

Lets gooooo!

Ep 8

Haha why are we like this

Nick said baby i don't careeee let's practice rn 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Oop Nick said I'm looking it up

Oh Nick please talk to him about it

Lmao he dropped him off like here's your deflowered son back

Tori is laughing inside

Jeez i can't imagine coming back after that and then talking to your mum

I get where his mom's coming from

Flowerovloveeee!!!! Omg all my favorite artists are here

Ask me my music taste and it's just heartstopper soundtrack

Charlie and Nick are a mess

I love the lgbt squad in all their sections

Imogen omg is this a coming out scene ?? Comp het???? Another lesbian 😭😭😭 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

Tara ain't feeling it

Nick is so embarrassed and them buying stuff i love it

The friendships are amazing in this show! I some think we see that enough displayed in teen/young adult shows

Awee the queer guide and his rugby boyfriend

The maturity in Charlie now 😭😭my baby

I love that Nick has his group

Tori is so happy

Ughhh the set design !!!!!

Lmao Michael is so cute

He's standing so awkwardly i love it

The siblings are so sweet (we need more of this in TV shows!!)

The song is so cute!

Lmao Nick dissing imogen

Nick needs to see he'll be okay without him

Nick please you're in public

The fair scene is so cute

Nick ain't thinking with his noggin at all for most the show🤣🤣🤣

They're gonna make me explode into a billion pieces of sadness and queer joy 😭😭

Ugh intimacy

End of ep 8???

What happened? It's just done 😟

Okay season 4 please love you Alice will be back with a dissertation or something. ✌🏾

[lotus-pear]

it’s impossible to be online when ur answering asks bc i obviously HAVE to read what the people are saying

but anyway, Update bitch, I READ STORMBRINGER (EXTREME SPOILER WARNING FOR THE PPL THAT KEEP PUTTING IT OFF LIKE I DID)

someone in the server was writing a one shot and needed feedback and when i sat to help they were like “u cant read this if u don’t know what happens!! it’ll spoil the ending!!” and i was like okay crazy, it’s not like i haven’t seen too much already 🙄🙄

LOTUS

THE WAY I FREAKED OUT ABOUT THE CLONE

THAT SHIT WAS NOT LEGAL TO BE PUT ON ME

THAT SHIT WAS DEEPLY UNNECESSARY

also didn’t know the flags died THAT EARLY??? like OKAY SURE make me love them and then TAKE EM AWAY RIGHT THEN AND THERE

Verlaine and Rimbaud are so lovers, like it’s kinda crazy that Asagiri put them together and make them close and have the GAL TO NOT MAKE THEM LOVERS LIKE EXCUSE ME-

he had the time to put Verlaine shoot Rimbaud like he did when he was drunk in Paris bUT NOT MAKE THEN HAVE LETTERS?? THE DIARY WAS DECIDEDLY NOT ENOUGH THANK YOU VERY MUCH

the way i was shocked that Verlaine ends up training the kids like Gin and Kyouka like OKAYYYYY THATS SLAYYY

Adam is my long lost love, idc if he was told to be nice by the creator (Wollstonecraft) but he and I are destined actually

ALSO BRO U SCARED ME WITH DAZAI BUT LIKE… It… it wasn’t that bad??

CUZ LISTEN

torture sucks. but tbh it’s so in character with him the news aren’t shocking at all. what is shocking? LETTING HIM CHOOSE TO USE CORRUPTION OR NOT??? HIM DOING HIS BEST TO FIND OUT WHETHER HE’S HUMAN OR NOT EVEN THO DAZAI HIMSELF IS CONVINCED??? BEING MADE TO PUKE AND PUKE AGAIN AS A CONSEQUENCE FOR LETTING CHUUYA BE TORTURED BC FAIR IS FAIR???

stormbringer just continues to prove they are so distinctly them and no one else has a chance in there 😭😭

in conclusion shirase is such a dumb bitch but lowkey at the end i kinda liked him

this is all to say lotus dear

ADAM ART DROPPING WHEN????

average stormbringer reaction also psa if you come out of stormbringer hating shirase or verlaine then the block button is right there bc none of my content is for you! i will love them both until the day i die ♥️

anyway stormbringer for me wasnt about chuuya it was about RIMLAINE i was curious abt rimabaud’s death monologue and was like “hm…who is this partner he speaks so fondly of?” least to say i wasn’t disappointed at all, quite the contrary in fact…..i was devastated. verlaine how does it feel knowing you’re my favorite character ever what did asagiri even put in that man to make him sooooo

ALSO ADAM WAUUGGHHH i stay delusional thinking since skk are in europe theyre gonna go to london or smt to see shirase and adam….sighhhh stormbringer trio i love you

anyway looks like you enjoyed‼️ for maximum whiplash you should read tdipud next

[crystalelemental]

Shifting gears, there is another game I finished playing a few weeks ago actually. I didn't talk about it because at the time, my intent was to complete the other routes and then discuss in more depth. That is not happening. Game's long, I needed a break, we're talking about just the one I did.

Shin Megami Tensei V Vengeance! I have...a complicated history with this particular series. It's short history, but still complicated. A high school friend I hope to never see again was super into it, and convinced me to give it a try when the newest one, SMT4, came out. I hated it. I can't even tell you all the reasons I hated it because I barely remember anything about it. Could not name a character, could not tell you anything about the story. I do remember feeling like the difficulty was bullshit, and being mad that cool monster designs had to go away because early demons don't keep up anymore, but the point is I have not looked favorably upon it.

"So why they hell did you buy another one?" This is going to sound insane, but I was playing Digimon Cyber Sleuth/Hacker's Memory and some of the setup and structure pinged as like...oh man, this is how I was supposed to approach that old SMT game. I bet I could play those and be good at them now! I also kinda blame @sinisteapot for posting a gifset of Agrat around that time. I know what I'm about. So I decided hey, if I find a copy, I'll give it a shot. And wouldn't you know it, games were actually in stock at GameStop for once. Sometimes miracles do happen.

I actually asked sinisteapot about the game prior to buying, and was told that it's mostly running around the desert listening to really good music, and kinda went "Okay, so it's a bit open ended like." What I was not ready for was 90 hours of a single route because I kept fucking around in the desert listening to really good music. Seriously, have you heard this shit? I think I spent two days worth of hour-long commute to and from work with just this one on repeat after reaching this zone. The music is very good.

Plot and character-wise, I actually had a pretty good time. I don't have a ton to say, in part because I only did one route out of apparently six, but I do like the characters we meet. Tao is my girl, I find her absolutely fascinating. Yoko's fun and honestly the funniest character in the game, always a treat when I jokingly say "kill them" when talking about there only being one way to deal with bullies and that's exactly what the character says. I actually find Dazai interesting despite him being kind of a piece of shit? Like, I had pegged Atsuta as the one about to go off the deep end about needing to be strong above all else, only for Dazai to be the one to snap about power being justice and whatever. Did not expect it to be him right away but the progression tracks.

For context, the route I cleared was Canon of Vengeance Law. It works out pretty neat for the most part. I really liked what the game was doing all through the Qadistu sequences. My wife played Canon of Creation instead, and honestly a lot of the sections feel hollow without their presence, it's just not quite as fulfilling? That said, I feel like the final area kinda drops off a bit. It's less interesting without the Qadistu, we kinda backpedal into the Lucifer stuff despite him not being present or significant at all for the game thus far, we kinda lose track of Mastema despite him being set up as a problem, and they killed Nuwa off-screen which is bullshit. I do like that the decision between Tao and Yoko at the end is made for you based on all your decisions to that point, and I greatly appreciate that the two of them stand completely opposed without it being like...I don't know the word I want to use here, but it's nice that they like each other as people. They're not just constantly antagonistic and awful and you have to pick the waifu or whatever. You're kinda just around while they have their clash of ideals. Which is nice.

But forget that nerd shit! It's time to finally answer the question of whether all these years have made me good at SMT!

No. They did not. I turned the difficulty down to Easy at the Namaah/Glasya-Labolas fight in Tokyo. I couldn't do it. I think I could now, but I couldn't at the time. I do have a bit more familiarity with its game, and I think I can talk intelligently about it, but...I am not good at it. I actually couldn't beat the superboss of the menorah quest. I couldn't do it. Like, could not. I tried and just got my shit blasted repeatedly. I have one idea, but...I'm not about to do it.

Anyway! The Press Turn system is neat. Each party member gets one action, but you gain more actions by striking an enemy weakness or landing a critical hit. Press Turns work by setting up your four blue circles. Getting an extra turn makes one flash, while not landing one consumes the left-most circle, flashing or otherwise. What means means is, your first and third slot need to land those conditions to get the full 8 turns, the other two can be more support-centric. As a result, I had my Nahobino set up with elemental coverage, and a third demon who did basically the same for most of the game. Agrat wound up my second slot because she can crit magic and hits 12 times with her signature move, which is great odds for another action, while my fourth was the sort of pure support.

However, you can also lose turns! When you miss, or an enemy negates an element, you lose not just your action turn, but another turn as well. If the enemy reflects or absorbs, you lose your entire round. I really like this system, because it makes AoE magic a serious consideration. There are several bosses and considerations where you want the AoE effect to hit the multiple targets in tandem, but there are several situations where you might aim for a weakness in a cluster, hit the AoE, only to find one enemy can negate it. The negation takes priority. Which means AoE, unlike most games where the AoE is a straight improvement over single-target, this game actually makes both valuable. Meanwhile, missing is absolutely devastating, and it makes the buff/debuff to both Accuracy and Evasion as a single stat incredibly powerful. This might be the only time I don't completely hate evasion mechanics in a game, because there's a sense of cost/benefit, and means of mitigating those detriments.

For most of the game, elemental damage felt ideal. Almost everything has a weakness, and as long as you're willing to use Spyglass to reveal the full enemy profile, you'll be fine. In fact, using items is hugely important here. Spyglass also reveals their attacks, so you can change up your party to not be weak to the elements they're throwing around. With the right spread, you can go from getting stomped to completely blasting the boss away. With the ability to apply another demon's traits to your own, you can really get crafty with your approach.

But. The last like two or three hours feel like the game suddenly pivots on a dime, into situations where enemies are immune to basically everything. And now your intended solution is Almighty damage. Which...generally fine? I guess? But truth be told, it feels like late-game Nahobino wants to go Strength. Your best Almighty attack is a high crit Strength-based attack. While your best magic move is great and pierces so no one can steal your turns, that means a lot less when you can't crit with it or strike a weakness. So you really shift into wanting to crit all the time, and the entire spread of skills feels like it needs reworked. I also got to learn that 99 is apparently not the stat cap. So my decision to evenly spread my stats was, in fact, ill-advised. Oops? You can adjust your stat allocations, and this combined with another full playthrough to get High Almighty Pleiroma again was my solution to that superboss, but it feels like more than I want to deal with.

I also feel like it's a bit mean to have the shop never sell MP recovery items. Maybe this is skill issue, but I feel like I am constantly running out of MP at every boss fight, even easier ones that we had no trouble with. My damage output was just never impressive at any point. Maybe I set myself up wrong, I honestly don't know. I think the fact this game is pretty open-ended and lets you explore a lot is the only reason I can beat it. You get a lot of these...magatama things, that will drop money, glory, or instant level items for you or your demons, and I got...quite a few for me. So I was at least a little overleveled the entire game, because I'd get all those resources and be really insistent on completing the demon compendium. But hey, at least I can over-level to solve a problem? I appreciate it. Though I like to think by the end I had it; I beat Shiva's optional quest like 8 levels below him, that has to count for something, right?

As for the demons...okay, look. I am still a bit sad about how they fall off. I attached really hard to demons like Mermaid and Muu Shuwuu, and they just...cannot keep up forever. Which is lame. I did always find someone new, and at least by Agrat I could just Grimoire her to keep up. But it is at least slightly frustrating to me that many of my favorites are like...temporarily good and then need to be fused off. I also don't love that there are "accident-specific" fusions that are completely random. I couldn't get a single one despite my best efforts. My compendium will never be finished.

The broad takeaway is that I actually had a lot of fun. This is a really interesting game that I...wish I had more to say about? I dunno, it's weird. I like it, I had a good time, but I struggle to find anything particularly clever to say about it? Maybe that's fine. I'm overthinking things again. Good game, fun time.

[blazescompendium]

Shin Megami Tensei is 31 years old today.

image provided by Vesk Scans. Please follow her archiving work!

Yeah, Shin Megami Tensei for the Super Famicom is now 31 years old. It is surprising for me how a game that came out full 6 years before i even give my first breath on this Earth, would be so important for me and my life. But here we are.

Even after playing the entirety of the mainline franchise, and a lot of spin offs, this game still holds its position very well in my heart because it is such a unique game. First, i always loved mythology and religion, so much so that i pursued it as a career. It started when i was little, with the influence of my father who was a scholar (albeit amateur) of those fields. Religion always played a major role in my life, both for the good and the bad, and although i don't actually align with any religion at the moment, i was studying the bible in a religious school since a very early age.

So, when i found out about Shin Megami Tensei, it clicked really, really well with me. I know that it is just a game, and even if it tries a lot to be faithful, as a researcher and scholar of Mythology and Religion we got to say it not always gets it right. But it tries! And when it tries, it can achieve very good results, and that's why i love it so much.

And that was when i was a teen/young adult. Now i grew up a lot, and even started my career in those fields, and still regard this game very high.

The characters are great for me, because i love how this game can be incredibly inclusive. Your main character is not a destined hero, or magical being. It is just an average guy, going to the groceries when the world start to end. He lives with his mom, have its problematic friends, and lives an average life. He always acts like any other person would act, and even his looks are just average.

Now, the thing is that this game did not aged well, but its absolutely playable and very fun to play. The old SMT titles have this ''survival horror'' energy, where you have to take care of resources while advancing in the game. ''Should you use your complete party in this dungeon, since its dangerous, but risk to deplete your MAG stock?'' Stuff like that got me.

And this brings me to how much i hate Atlus as a capitalist company. They made this effort to show us they care about the anniversary of the franchise that kick-started their business, but did not do anything about it. Just shoved merch to the US audience, that is not available anywhere else. Us, from outside, just did not got anything from this ''anniversary''. And i thought the Persona 25th was bad enough lol. But i guess merch hoarders are happy?

And that was a big fucking lie

I honestly don't want anything out of the ordinary. If they could at least port the SNES titles to the Switch Online at the west, because its already available in Japan, i beleive we would be very grateful already. Playing and presenting this games for a new generation is a pain. And i believe Shin Megami Tensei deserves it as a series, not only for its uniqueness but also for everything this IP did to Atlus.

But hey, i guess we are getting something, right? We have a whole new Persona 5 spin off coming next week! I am so hyped to see the same characters, exactly as they were 7 years ago, in another story about teen rebellion or whatever.

Im sorry, SMT. We failed with you. But your legacy will never be gone. I beleive SMT message keeps relevant to this day, and even more so as the time passes by. The world is a very different place then it was in 199X, but still a very divided and extremist place. SMT was the only game of its time to tackle this issues.

Happy anniversary to Shin Megami Tense, as a great game as one of my favorite games of all time. I wish more people could play it at least once!

And yeah, to celebrate i think i will be beating SMT 2 tonight, after lectures!

[captainjacklyn]

Ok....IRL update here we go.

So um- I've been reading a couple of manhwas and some are..a little old I mean people stopped reading those a long time ago or maybe I'm mistaken but either way I think its been at least a little while since people talked about....Ennead by Mojito. (it's an example and I think I have some plans for this one specifically cause the others are not something I could make writings about.) also- did I spell manhwa right ? idk if I did-

This will contain spoilers so those who do not know this manga I'm going to tell you that many of its content can be highly triggering to many people. Minors DNI or I will hack you system/jk but seriously do not, I don't wanna be responsible for any emotional scars.

!!SPOILERS OF ENNEAD BELOW THE CUT!!

Now this is mostly gonna be related to the reblog I made earlier regarding Seth. And the events that come after happen towards the end so bare with me, I'm quite new to the fandom and despite this fact I still wanna rant about smt that has been bugging me for a while.

Seth is...a very much broken character and I feel like he should be at peace...without Horus NOW WAIT BEFORE YOU START SPOUTING HATE AT ME-

Horus didn't intend to r*pe Seth but did in the end, Seth was actually planning on doing so but I'm a little more disturbed about smt else. I can't manage to see him as someone who is 'good'. Everything he does reminds me of Osiris and it grosses me out, I don't get the feel of 'loving actions' from Horus at all and he doesn't look sorry either.

It feels like he’s forcing his love onto set just like osiris did, with just less r*pe involved. I guess, to me, horus isn’t making up to his mistake enough. I think he could still be more gentle but Seth won't really allow that will he ? Ik he's also to blame for a lot of things but....SOMEONE LEAVE MY BABY ALONE-

He deserves to be at peace with a good friend or even his son, I want a happy ending (not that the other one wasn't happy, it just didn't correspond to me at all). i honestly just want the story to end with seth not being with any of them, just seth and some well deserved peace cuz this shit is getting tiring not of them are good choices for seth when it comes to relationships.

Thank you for listening.

[rath00ker]

The Twst x Demon slayer cross over that no one asked for (all the dorm-leaders are hashria cause reasons)

Heartslabyul

Riddle is the Flame Hashria cause he red. That’s it. Also because there was some dialogue that said that there was always a Flame and Water hashira at a time. So Riddle is the Flame Hashria who has only uses one Nichirin blade that’s red.

Riddle is from a famous demon slayer family (like Rengoku heho) and his mother was probably a high ranking demon slayer

Trey use wind breathing. I was stuck between wind, Stone and Flower breathing but like wind breathing users have green Nichirin blade and he is green. That is my reasoning. Thank you for listening

Trey probably isn’t even a demon slayer he’d probably work at like whatever the twst version of the butterfly mansion is and work there as a doctor because his personality fits more as a nurse than a demon slayer

Cater also uses Flame breathing but also works with Trey at whatever the twst version of the butterfly mansion is (I need to just make up a name for it). His reasoning is that he’s far to young and beautiful to be on the front lines like that but in reality he just isn’t very strong and fears he’d die quickly

Deuce uses water breathing because….blue. He’s a new demon slayer and his mom probably died or smt I dunno like half of the demon slayers have dead parents get to the back of the line.

Ace can’t use a breathing style and is still trying to learn one and probably makes up another way to kill demons.

Savanaclaw

Leona is the Beast Hashria because he is a beast man. Get it? I’m not creative. How did he learn Beast breathing when beast breathing was unique to Inosuke and how he learned his breathing style? I dunno don’t think about it to hard

Ruggie uses Thunder breathing and is known as one of the fastest members of the demon slayer crops. He doesn’t have a tragic backstory like everyone else he’s just here for the money

Jack uses Stone breathing because you have to be kinda beefy to use Stone breathing well and that is my reasoning.

Octavinelle

Azul is the water Hashria because if there’s a flame Hashria there is a water Hashria. Azul got to be the water Hashria because him and Riddle get compared in the game. That’s it. Also he is a fish.

Jade uses flower breathing because of his obsession with mushrooms. I have simple reasons you should have learned that by now

Floyd uses Stone breathing. Why? I don’t have a reasoning actually I just don’t know what else fits him (other than water breathing)

Scarabia

Kalim is the wind Hashria but he’s not actually strong enough to be considered a Hashria but was picked for some odd reason. He’s very kind and always makes sure to check on any humans around after he’s done his job

Jamil uses Serpent breathing because of his whole snake theme he has going on. He’s actually strong enough to be a Hashria but wasn’t pick (probably because Kalim is from a more important family) and he is very jealous of Kalim.

Pomefiore

Now please meet the reason this post was born. Vil is the Insect Hashria he also uses the same sword that Shinobu has to kill demons. He isn’t weak by any means he just prefers to use Insect breathing because if the demon gets away it’s already filled with poison and will die soon

Rook uses Insect Breathing as well but he uses a bow and Arrow instead of a sword. Using poison tipped arrows to attack Demons with

Epel uses Flower Breathing and fucking hates it due to how ‘girly’ he sees flower breathing as (Even if Flower breathing is still strong) he has a desire to try and learn Stone breathing but it hasn’t been going so well

Ignihyde

Idia is the Moon Hashria. I was gonna pick insect breathing for him as well since in Game Idia is shown to be very weak and a breathing style that was made because someone was to weak to be able to cut off a demons head sounds right but Vil is already the Insect Hashria sooo Moon breathing (how did he learn it? Idk don’t think too hard about it)

Imma be real Ortho probably just stays dead. Like he was probably killed by a demon and serves as Idias backstory. I am sorry Ortho fans this is my official apology

Diasomnia

Malleus is the Thunder Hashria. He is probably credited as the strongest Hashria (of his time) and has a rivalry with Leona. He’s incredibly fast and kills demons before they realize he’s even there

Lilia uses Flower breathing, I picked this because Flower breathing gives uses a pink sword and his hair do be pink. Also Flower breathing makes you think it wouldn’t be strong based on the name and Lilia looks like a young boy but is actually a 700 year old fae so looks are very deceiving.

Silver uses Mist breathing because he kinda reminds me of Muichiro. That’s it Silver is my least favorite character and I don’t want to think about him anymore heho

Sebek uses Thunder breathing because his last name is Zigvolt. It just makes sense. Okay bye now

That was my unasked for demon slayer x twisted wonderland au if your wondering about Yuu and Grim it would just be a Tanjiro and Nezuko situation. Grim would be a demon that was formerly close to Yuu and now Yuu is trying to cure him. Also Yuu uses Sun breathing.

[neomedievalist]

i feel i've already said what needs to be said about this game and it's kind of just widely accepted anyway so no need to retrace our steps here. yes, it's mid. It's extremely mid. if i can say one thing before this post gets too long it's this: Do not fucking buy vengeance at full price. Do not even buy it at half price. i DO NOT trust them to take smtv and make it good.

Okay lets talk about this law ending. needless to say it's the weakest law ending i have ever seen and it sounds like all the other endings are similarly mid. I was laughing at it and literally said wow this sounds just like objectively good what is the downside here until it got to the last line (pictured above) and i was just like OH lol. it genuinely feels like an afterthought really funny. Abdiel is a great character concept and has some great moments and i fucking wish they made her more relevant it hurts so bad that their good interesting ideas always go to waste but she was definitely like the peak of this route. blonde boy is nothing but i like that they did something unique and interesting with the law rep even if it ended up literally being nothing.

Its hard to disagree that the most interesting part of smtv lore is the fact that the world has already been destroyed and the normal world is an illusion kept up by god. I was waiting for them to do LITERALLY ANYTHING with that and they did not but in my head this is definitely the motivation to do law route. I was thinking back to the like one conversation/argument between the alignment reps and i want to tear my hair out thinking about how the moral dilemna of this was not brought up at all. I'm glad it was mentioned for one or two sentences in the ending but it is just not fucking enough. i hate that they didnt show any visuals at all for the ending cutscene. like immediately im thinking of strange journey law ending and how powerful and eerie it is with the scenery and everything but WE DO NOT GET TO SEE what the new world we created LOOKS like at all. We also jsut fucking get abdiel and blonde boy nodding at us and smiling with no actual commentary from them.

I will say I did enjoy a lot of the final bosses. the two final dungeons are absolute garbage just like the ONE other dungeon in the entire game. but the boss fights i really enjoyed which is obviously a common thread in smtv, the entire plot and everything is mid but the boss fights do get me hype. The tsukuyomi fight is absolutely a highlight it might be my fav fight in the game it really calls back to older ps2 smt final bosses, and lucifer was also extremely fun DESPITE THE FACT THAT I DID A MAGIC BUILD. It goes without saying the gameplay is fantastic although i have quite a few complaints they never really stopped me from having fun and they really pale in comparison to everything else in the game. i found the exploration Not Fun and i have also talked about this before. abcesses are fun for the first half of the game and then they become excruciatingly annoying I do not know why they decided to make them disrupt the map its genuinely awful. I do NOT like the miman collecting glory system i honestly think app points worked fine as they were and there was no reason to change them like this but, whatever. It ceases to be a problem in the lategame because you get a ton of glory crystals. thats another thing i noticed i had so many fucking items by endgame like grimoires that level up your demons i had been saving them for endgame and i used like...20 out of the 50 i had because why not btu they were really not needed. I also feel like the skill inheriting system where you get essences and can just put any fucking skill on a demon is incredibly busted BUT i can't actually complain about it because i have the ability to just Not Use It. same thing with the grimoires. Also the mp costs in this game are so fucking weirdly high but everyone has said this already. i also hate that concentrate is useless now. and i still hate that phys skills cost mp. but again none of this actually stopped me from having fun it all just mildly pissed me off

I honestly think other than abdiel my favourite character was tao. she was really interesting and had a lot going for her. after they kinda killed her off it was just like oh ok. anyway. i feel like she was involved in most of the actually good plot development scenes in the game and her conflict was genuinely cool and compelling. but, whatever, we just have amaterasu now i guess. Yuzuru was nothing, I really do not give a fuck abt nuwa and her boytoy sorry, prime minister was kind of interesting, i literally forget every other character in this game. who was the girl with the green scarf and what the fuck did she do. where is she. did she die? i cannot remember at all.

here now i have to admit it. i do want to play vengeance because i'm a sucker. i would love for them to elaborate on all of these themes that were dropped. but i genuinely ...i picture myself paying $20 for it and still feeling ripped off. i've seen some people say it looks good and interesting so far and i have to say it does not look interesting so far. i dont care about the new things theyre doing they dont look interesting enough to make me have faith or be invested. what would make me, and what IS making US buy this game as smt fans, is blind faith in atlus that this will be SMTV BUT GOOD. and WE CANNOT HAVE THIS BLIND FAITH!! WE CANNOT!! we cant fucking do this. we trusted smtv in the first place to be good and look where we are now! just because they're making an updated version of a mid game doesn't mean it wont ALSO BE MID! WE CANNOT FALL FOR THIS!! DO NOT FUCKING BUY VENGEANCE!! IF YOU HAVE TO BUY IT DO NOT BUY IT FULL PRICE AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DONT BUY ON RELEASE OR PREORDER BECAUSE I STILL REGRET THAT SO BAD.

oh also the blatant nocturne nostalgiabaiting still pisses me off ive just talked too much abt that already in other posts it isnt worth bringing up again. ok bye.

After almost 3 years i have finally fucking finished smtv. post coming with my full thoughts and review shortly

[chronosaurusnot]

VIP boy

pairing: dom!bangchan x bratty sub!reader

genre: smut

word count: 2.1k

warnings: +18, night club, mentions of alcohol, teasing (with minho), jealousy, possessiveness, bratty behavior, explicit sexual content, bathroom sex, choking, pet names, degrading, slight humiliation, fingering, oral sex (m), rough sex, unprotected sex (stay safe please), cumming, creampie

note: so the original idea was a request from my friend about chan in a night club, but after that teaser i can't get out of my mind that scene of him choking hyunjin from behind. so, this is a mix of both things, i hope you like it!

as always, i’d like to clarify that english is not my first language, so please let me know if there are any mistakes, and feel free to give me suggestions<3

-----------

you ended up in the night club again with your friends; another night when you don’t know why you are there. it’s been a rough week, full of work and with stressful exams, so your friends insisted on getting you out to distress yourself a little bit. but between the time you’ve spent on getting ready plus all the sweaty people pushing you all around right now, you could swear you would’ve been better in your bed watching a movie or something, or even sleeping. it’s been already an hour maybe? you don’t know so you go straight to the bar to get some drink to see if time gets faster; hopefully it’ll make you less grumpy.

but when you are there, you see him on the vip section of the first floor. chan is there with his friends, talking and looking good as he always does. you start feeling like the night could maybe get a little more interesting, but when you get to see him talking with a girl that feeling changes to anger. sure, you agreed on being friends with benefits -if that was even a title or smt- so you both could be with anyone else you wanted, always respecting each other. so if he didn’t know you were there, in the same way you didn’t know he was coming too, it was okay if he wanted to be with someone else, right? but all the logic didn’t seem to care to your emotions, because you were now in a horrible mood.

you took your drink from the bar and drank it in less than a minute without taking your eyes off him and that girl. that dumb girl, she really thinks he’s hers tonight. but it’s stupid to feel like fighting over a man, so you get your mind clear and go back with your friends to tell them what you just saw to laught about it.

but when you look up again, you see chris leaning on the railing looking at you. he smiles when he notices your stare and waves at you, and after you wave back he makes gestures to let you know you can go there with them. you really wanted to play hard but you go there with your friends, following his instructions like a puppy obeys his owner.

“hey princess, you didn’t tell me you were coming” he greets you with a smile on his face. “yeah, the girls insisted on going out to destress a little bit, but i think i would have been better sleeping” you answer, trying to hide your growing excitement to see him there. “oh don’t be grumpy y/n, it’s early, we can still have a good night” he said in a cute and smirky way, an attitude that you hated and loved at the same time.

“yes i see you were already having a good time” you answer, and chris looks kinda confused. you point with your eyes to the girl he has been talking to, and he smirks at your reaction. “don’t be jealous princess, i was just talking”

you rolled your eyes at his stupid answer, and he just smiles. you hated how flirty he was and his fuck boy vibes, but there was something about him that eventually made you like him; maybe way too much. it all started as just a sex partner, but since day one you discover he was actually a super sweet, caring and fun guy, so you got really atractted to him in a matter of time. friends with benefits sounded right for both of you, but you always wanted more from him. maybe it’s his fault, cause he’s always giving you everything you want, but not only sexually; he is a pleasant man, you know he would give and do anything for his girl. and you wanted to be that girl. his only one.

and especially tonight. how could someone be so fine? he was all in black as always: black pants, black leather jacket and a black silk shirt that let you see his whole chest. “what a fucking fuck boy” you said to yourself, trying to hate him.

“what do you wanna drink, babygirl?” chan said, bringing you back from your thoughts. “your favourite one?” he continued while taking off his wallet from his pocket. you knew he was just doing it to show his hands; chan knew exactly the power his hands hold on you.

“yes, please” he smiles at your answer and goes to the bar for your drink.

but as soon as he goes, minho comes to you. “come on change that shitty face and dance a little y/n” he says while grabbing you from your arms to force you to dance with him. he takes you maybe way too closer to his body considering he is chris’s friend. but you think to yourself that maybe it’s a good idea; using this to get chan’s attention, to look at you, to make him jealous, and taking advantage to dance with a man so fine like minho. you wouldn’t be with him, sure, he is his friend; but it would be nice to at least flirt with him a little bit.

you sincerely got lost while dancing with him, so close to each other; till you notice chan looking at you both while leaning on the railing with the two cups on his hands. he looks at you in a challenging way, like wanting to see how far you can go.

and you accept the challenge, getting minho even closer to your body without cutting the eye contact with chris; you can see how his eyes turned darker, and you just smirk at his reaction. you dance a couple more minutes with minho, his hands on your waist, yours on his neck; after deciding it was enough teasing, you go back to chan playing the innocent. “he was helping me to cut out the bad mood, he’s so sweet. thank you for the drink channie”

“yeah i see, you should hang out with him.” he answers, his look darker; you prouder. “oh you think so? i mean, he seems to want to help me out to not be bored.” you answer, loving to see how your dumb plan worked.

“oh you just want to have fun, mh?” he says in a dark way, making you feel nervous and taking a big sip from your drink. “i know a place when you could have fun”.

you finished your drink in a couple of seconds, so he just takes your cup away from your hand. “why don’t you follow me, princess?”

he lefts the cups in the table, and takes you by the hand to guide you through the place. he talked to you calmly, but you knew he wasn’t not only because of the way he looked at you, but also cause he was holding you rough.

“get in, princess” chris says, letting you place to came in the bathroom. you get shocked; is a public space, but you are feeling so aroused with this situation that you just got in. chan locks the door behind you and turns you around to put you against it, resting his hand above you.

“you’ve been such a bratty, babygirl” he says, using his free hand to caress your cheek, slowly moving down to your neck. “if you were just bored, you should have told me instead of acting like a slut with my friend” chan continues while adding pressure on your neck, making you shut your legs from the feeling. he notices it and smirks in a mocking way. “are you already turned on, y/n? are you that desperate?”

he keeps on adding pressure, driving you crazy. you felt your panties getting wetter as every second passed by. so you decided to keep pushing his limits. “you’re not the only one who pays attention to me, chris. you should try better” his smile turns devilish.

“do you want me to remind you how good i fuck you, y/n?” he keeps choking you, but uses his other hand to touch you under your skirt. “do you want me to remind you whose name you repeat endless times while moaning?” he moves your panties to a side and start touching your pussy while still choking you, making you moan at the feeling of his cold hands rubbing against your clit. he laughs mockingly again at your desperate face.

“did you get this wet while dancing with minho? do you prefer his fingers over mine?” he never desease the smirk on his face, his nose touching yours and the feeling of his heavy breathing so close to you while you were cutted out of air made you go crazy. but you let out a moan after he gets two fingers inside you, making him laugh again.

“tell me, princess. tell me whose are you” you wanna answer, but he curls his fingers inside you while increasing his pace and makes you even harder to breathe. “i’m yours” you answer, and he takes his fingers out of you to put them in your mouth. you suck them instinctively, keeping eye contact with him, seeing the arousal in his eyes.

“you’re mine, y/n. no one else” you keep sucking on his fingers while his other hand finally moves from your neck to your waist, getting you closer to him. he softly moans at the feeling of his hardened dick rubbing against your hot core. “you are my baby slut, and the only one i want to please”

that was everything you needed to hear for being now completely at his will. the only thing you wanted was to be his only girl, the only one who he pleases, the only one who pleased him. you were feeling more desperate than ever now, getting crazier at the way he was rubbing his bulge against you in such a needy way, with both of his hands now on your hips, guiding you to make the touch rougher.

you remove his jacket and your eyes travel all over his chest, revealed by the thin silk. one of your hands caresses his chest, shoulders and neck, while the other one unzips his pants to get his cock out, making him moan louder at the feeling of your skin. “let me please you too, chris” you tell him in a whiny voice that makes him shiver.

you kneeled before him, and as soon as your lips touched the tip of his cock he rested both of his hands on the door that was behind you, moving his head backwards between deep groans.

“you’re such a pretty slut for me, y/n” he says and you speed up your pace. he starts to feel uncomfortable in any position, battling his urge to cum only to have you sucking on his dick for a longer time.

just when you feel his precum in your mouth he lifts you up, getting his eyes teary due to the denied orgasm. “turn around, princess. i’m not over yet”.

chan pushes your body against the door, guiding your ass close to him and lifting your skirt. he kisses your neck before pulling his cock inside you, making you both moan at the feeling of your stretched and wet pussy. “tell me who can fuck you this good, y/n?” he says while keeping a painful fast speed, tears forming in your eyes from the intense excitement.

“are you still thinking in minho, mh?” he says while he chokes you from behind, the other hand guiding your hips to move on his cock even harder. “tell me again, babygirl, who do you belong to?”

the feeling of his fast and hard pace, his hand holding you hard from your hips, his other hand cutting your air, his heavy breathing on your neck, his possessiveness, his moans; everything was making you feel extremely sensitive, desperate for a release of the tension that’s been building up. “you, o-only to you” you cried out in a broken voice.

his now clumsy moves showed you he was close too, getting weak to your submission. “only mine, y/n. f-fuck.” his last words whispered in your ear made you hit your orgasm. the feeling of your release all over his cock made him cum inside you, groaning your name in a completely fucked up way.

after a moment to catch up your breaths, he turned you back, facing you with a relaxed smile. “you’re still my girl after this, y/n. and i’ll always please my girl.”

[pandoraylamcraziness]

Analysis of ep 8

Warning:  spoilers for ep 8 and preview of ep 9. This is a long ass post. Edit: I’m very sorry this is VERY long and I tried to cut it in two parts but tmblr hates my guts ;_;

Seeing this gifset of the paralels of the Fall of Trust between Sean and White got me thinking.

I don’t know what to think of Sean. I mean, in the preview it seems like he knows there’s a sibling. 

He suspect something. But I have no idea how he came to that conclusion. Maybe he found something else (like the fandon headcanon that he found the application papers for the diplomatic job. Who knows). Bc I think it would be grasping at straws if all he had was: 1) the fact Black is acting different 2) and the glasses and contact lenses 

There’s hole between the time Sean woke up and found the glasses and the time White woke up and found himself tied that we didn’t see.

Why did he did that?  I think he found something else but didn’t give him answers, only more questions. That’s why he tied White, bc he wanted to ask him questions and not being able to escape. But somewhere after White woke up he changed his mind. He left way too abruptily.

Let’s take what happened when White woke up:

- Sean is dressed. Metaphorical armor put on again. - He was waiting in the balcony for White to wake up, like he couldn’t bear the thought of looking at him, unlike when he woke up and spent a lot of time looking at White sleep (and caresing him with his fingers under the guise of seeing if he could wake him up, don’t think we didn’t see that Sean)

They had been drinking the night before. They fell asleep together. If Black (White) was someone he’s not who he says (a spy, a sibling, whatever) and lying to him and meaning harm, the logical conclusion to waking up tied in his own bed is that he’s been found.

Yet. Yet Black (White) first reaction was to call for Sean.

He’s screaming at the door, like he thinks Sean has been taken, like he fears for him.

That’s the first thing that didn’t go how Sean expected it. So he tries to keep going.

He tries to act menacing. But even if Black (White) is startled to find it was Sean who tied him, he’s not acting scared.

He’s not scared. He’s annoyed, yes, but he’s not scared of Sean. 

And then, when Sean tries to be intimidating (that way you leaned into his personal space, looming over him and talking in his ear is more sexy than you intended Sean, I see you), he takes a step back to regain his bearings and THIS happens:

(very nice legs courtesy of Gun)

THAT wasn’t something Sean could have ever thought it would happen. Fight him, hit him, do some serious damage like the real Black would do -or someone passing for him and pretending he’s weaker than he seems- ? Yes.  But not this. Grab his waist with his legs and push him close to him? I don’t think Sean in a million years would have thought he'd end like this after he made the decision of tying him.

He was BITING him!!! Black (White) could do real damage in this posture. He could kick Sean in the groin, could bite his ear (and not in a sexy way), could put so much pressure with his legs on his ribs that Sean would have trouble breathing. He could put his thighs around Sean’s neck (again, not in a sexy way) and press until Sean would be unconscious.  But he didn’t do anything of that. He just bit his arm like a dog (lol) and push him close and Sean was too offended and perplexed he didn’t know what to do. 

Nothing in how White reacted was what he expected. He didn't act like he was 'caught'. He didn’t act like he was in serious danger. He acted like Sean was messing with him, like it was a training exercise or smt like that. Or just plain Sean being an asshole. He was pissed, yes, but he wasn’t acting like he was in actual danger, just like they were messing with each other.

Sean was flustered.

So he said his snarky remark and flew the fuck out of there.

I wonder what was on Sean’s head when he got out. What he was thinking? Certainly nothing about this went in any way he predicted.

His new feelings for White has been brewing for some time, but all his interactions with Black (White) leaves him too surprised and perplexed to actually stop and think about what he feels about it. He almost never got the time to process those feelings or think about them. And then of course, he had to suffer Tawi’s presence at the university, so all thoughts about Black (White) flew out of the window.

He never catches a break, the poor thing.

He looks drained.

---

Now, back to White. One thing that took me by surprise was Todd coming to Black’s house like nothing. Yes, he brought groceries and he said he came bc White didn’t contact him in a while. But the first thing I thought was  “what if Sean left a camera or something? Did the crossed each other when Sean left the building? Why Todd came unannounced, what if White was with someone?? Gram, Sean or Eugene??” I even thought for a moment that maybe Sean tied White bc he knew Tawi was gonna be at the Uni and didn’t want to see him, but that doesn’t make sense.

---

Now 6 little (i tried ;__;) details that left me thinking:

1. Sean’s jacket

Happiness Loyalty Origins Constancy Family Commitment Teamwork

I only noticed them when I was making screencaps and I had to take a moment to stare at the screen bc holy shit. If all of that is not Sean at his core (and White too) I don’t know what it is. (jesus, the details of this show are killing me) (also, damn Gun with those legs. What? I have eyes!)

2. The thing White does with Sean’s ear. 

Maybe I’m thinking too much, but I think (maybe) it’s gonna be important at some point. Like a White thing. Maybe at some moment Black is gonna pretend to be White (like the trailer when he spits after kissing Sean) and this is gonna be something that tells him he’s not White.

3.  The funny thing is that Sean thinks Black is too drunk to feel him touching him and tying him -sure the real Black wouldn’t leave himself be this vulnerable, no matter how drunk he is, much less with Sean- when the truth is that White drinks vodka like it’s water, so this is just White subconsciously feeling safe around Sean.

Look at him. He’s smol and with a liver of titanium. If there’s an alcohol competition at the garage he would be the only one standing, while the others are either passed out (I think Sean would be the first which is hilarious as hell) or being messy drunks (Gram would be an emotional drunk, talking about imposible love and pining about Black; Sean we already saw he’s a sticky one, affectionate drunk. He would be hugging everyone and being all over White, pinching his cheeks and telling him how soft they’re before passing out cold and using his leg as a pillow leaving White all “???????????!!!”; Gumpa would be the surprise. He becomes the Problematic One™, cheery to the point of concern, jumping with Yok and seeing who comes with the wildest and dumbest ideas ever. That’s why he doesn’t drink. Yok is delighted. White is more concerned by the minute. They had to tie a rope to his waist so he don’t wander off and set fire to something (Yok is grinning like a maniac. White hopes he doesn’t remember anything tomorrow. In fact, he hopes no one remembers anything tomorrow. Specially after Sean drapes himself over White while Gram looks to the point of crying and Yok hollers at them and Gumpa says very seriously “This is all my work” before having a fit snickering)

(I’m dying to see a scene like this or one in which White drinks Sean under the table and he’s like fresh as a rose and Sean is red as a tomato until he falls asleep on his shoulder lol. But well, we always have fic lol)

4. I think Sean went to Black’s house with something in mind.

(this was very sexy of him)

Maybe getting him drunk and take a look over his things, maybe just to get himself drunk enough to be able to thank Black. Who knows. But he didn’t expect how things developed. This Black that cared was still a novelty. A novelty that scared him shitless bc he liked it. He liked the new Black and didn’t know what to do with that. He sure didn’t expect to spill his guts, and he didn’t expect Black to react this tender with him. 

(I see you White. Where are you looking at?)

5. The way he says to Gumpa he has been sleeping in Black’s home.

This is after he says that. He’s looking at Gumpa like he’s trying to see if Gumpa knows. If he thinks it’s also strange Sean slept in Black’s house. If anyone is smarter enough or pays enough attention to dettails, it has to be Gumpa. He has to know something. Anything.

And this is his face when Gumpa acts like everything is normal. Like there’s nothing out of the ordinary. After Gumpa gives him information for their next hit and Sean acts like it’s not something big and to be excited about. It feels like it’s the face of “I have to tell you something about Black”, or maybe “Do you really don’t think there’s something wrong with Black?”. This is the face of someone who has made a decision. 

6. The Fall of Trust

I think he doesn’t know who the hell is White -or maybe he has an idea-, he’s trying to figure out if he can trust him. He’s trying to figure out this new Black, or whoever he is.

So he falls. Figuratively and literally.

They both did:

And White catches him.

This is the most beautiful visualization of what letting oneself fall in love is. 

This is the face of someone who has been proven rigth.

“Oh. He cares about me”

“But he’s scared”

“He’s scared. He’s lying to me and he’s scared of nothing. But he’s scared of this”

“He’s gonna try to act like it’s nothing”

“And I don’t want him to”

“I have to do something”

“I like him and I’m at peace with myself”

White is giving him an out. To put aside what whatever happened between them and talk about other things. The Plan.  But he’s also being incredibly honest at the same time. White doesn’t know Sean suspects he’s not who he says he is. He’s asking a question he thinks Sean will take at face value, like they’re talking about social fighters stuff. What he’s really asking is “What I’d be doing if I didn’t came here? If I didn’t meet you guys? If I didn’t meet you. Who would I be? If you didn’t meet me. Who would you be?”

And Sean gets it. He gets what White is talking about. And he’s surprised. Again. He sighs. “I shouldn’t be surprised at this point” This is another reason. He gets even more determined then.

He takes a step closer. “I have to make him understand”

“I got you”

“He’s still scared”

“I got you”

“I’m not gonna let you go”

Some might be thinking this is Sean trying to manipulate White into trusting him with the things he’s hiding. But even if that’s true, Sean truly shot himself in the foot. Because this kiss?

This kiss was real.

Ps: Also the detail of how, even if White kissed him back, he didn’t grab Sean. I think the moment he tells Sean the truth (or maybe not, seeing the preview) is when he’s gonna grab Sean with his two hands and kiss him like he’s never gonna let him go.

[bulldyke-rider]

Idk if youre taking rants and Idw bother you so you can delete this btw but tw csa and child abuse. so one if the things that bothers me is when rabfems on here imply or say Im supposed to fight for women whove hurt me as well. my mother was my primary abuser. hell Im still fighting for her. but the implication that what she did was smt she was made to do never sits right with me. she hit me because the patriarchy forced her to? the sexual abuse? she told me she would be better off with me dead, when I wasnt even 5. how am I not supposed to blame the person that has done and said this to me??? this part has been v bad for me and v harmful with helping me with my ptsd. the implication itself makes me mad enough like as if women cant do no wrong when my mother did for several fucking years.

The idea of helping women you don't like comes from like conservative women who in general enforce the same rules on themselves that they enforce on other women. And they enforce these rules often because they see how unsafe it is to be a woman. But the women I don't like aren't just women who hate themselves as much as they hate me.

The women I'm complaining about are women trying to be me and then pushing me out of groups that supposedly welcome women like me. But they don't actually because they're really for osa women who put on a label.

There's an escape from every other group of women you don't like except homophobic women. All the radical feminists found eachother and they don't have to deal with conservative women to do their fighting for women shit. But there is no escape from homophobic women because you can't even just be around lesbians. There will always be a homophobic liar within any lesbian group; it's near impossible to weed them out.

But I get your discomfort with it too. A lot of the "the patriarchy caused her to do that" sounds exactly like libfems saying men can't help it because of the patriarchy. If one person can shed it, so can everyone else. If you can think about it and realize it's bullshit, so can everyone else.

[fantomette22]

Ok alright! *crack fingers*

First, we got to thanks Alfred for actually being the (only) one to explain to us a LOT of lore about it.

BUT, well he's probably biased because church propaganda + it's been a long time + side of the story of executioners aka vilebloods haters #1. But perhaps it's also possible he made quite a lot of research as well! Besides Queen killer (who perhaps is dead since a while) he's the only executioner. The covenant is perhaps not even active since a while and idk why the church would have give him that MUCH infos so at least the boi did his homework or try.

I would give SO MUCH to have Annalise's side of the story (she don't tell us anything 💀)it would probably be a bit biased as well but we would have both sides of the story.

We would probably have smt more neutral if we ask smn else who know what happened and could tell us 🤔 (Gehrman why don't you explain lore to us?! AHHHHHH !!!! oh yeah freaking moon presence screw you!)

So it's complicated to know what blood they take? it's not even 100% clear it's been "stolen" (I believe so but hey it could also be interpreted that Laurence gave them).

So Maybe it's just some "normal" old blood but it had particular effect because of cainhurst origin with pthumerians and all + their used are differents (look for blood dregs + use blood to fight not heal)

But my main headcanon / theory is the following :

I think this forbidden blood might come from Queen Yharnam herself. Or is similar to the blood she took. That's why it's forbidden. After all, queen killer is an executioner and can help us fight her. Why would he be here?

PLUS (I notice it today while a friend was streaming Yharnam's fight). They pointed out that her blood fight abilities + attacks were super similars to the ones Lady Maria use! (it's not clear if she's a Vileblood herself but if all her family is she perhaps was born like this and hated it as well). They are the only 2 who do that! (ok bloodlickers have an attack in common with Yharnam XD) No other Pthumerians use their blood like this as well!

+ her blood inflicted rapid poisoning like bloodsuckers, mergo attendants and the transformer chikage, perhaps it's why it's forbidden? + the ability to see blood dregs etc and with what happen to pthumerians and Queen Yharnam it's probably link with bad events so forbidden. And it made Annalise become semi immortal so... weird blood yeah. Maybe it killed people if you injected it to anyone and don't pass by a medium like Annalise or smt 💀

Sadly we don't have other exemple of other Vilebloods who could do that (+ we can theorize that others and Annalise without her mask? could maybe do that).

Random thought while I’m at work, but I don’t think the forbidden blood that the scholar brought to Cainhurst was the same “old blood” that Laurence and Willem were starting to look into. (To clarify: The blood of the Great Ones).

I suspect it was a tainted offshoot, or maybe the same frenzied blood Annalise wants for dregs that you find in blood-drunk hunters. Maybe it was even Pthumerian blood, or their coldblood (deadblood in Japanese).

It may have been a specific strain of blood that Byrgenwerth absolutely knew was dangerous or polluted, so they marked it as forbidden. (Could it have been undead blood like Annalise’s? That is what turns us into a Vileblood in the game, after all).

“The forbidden blood” and the “blood of the Healing Church” seem to be two different things to me. Laurence’s blood is all Great One-based, and the only one that would call it forbidden is…maybe Willem? But even then, Willem didn’t actually lay down a law to stop Laurence.

Now it is possible that they are the same, and that it was just Great One blood mingling with Pthumerian descendants that caused the transformation because of ancient pacts and relations.

But why was it forbidden?

Could we go even deeper and say that, as I have often suspected, Alfred’s story is full of lies because of Logarius? Did Logarius twist the truth to justify his vendetta? In my opinion, that would be in-character for a cult leader.

There are actually so many possibilities here, and I’m trying to figure out what to settle on.