#hwhbh!wilbur

[sunlitmcgee]

was about to make a post about how teenage Michael struggles to get much in the way of dating advice from his parents because. Yeah. and I was like "oh maybe he can talk to XD or Jordan or whoever" and then I remembered "Oh Yeah. This kid's uncle is Cee Wilbur Bisexual Soot. He's fine."

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

hi metaru i have work in like an hour but before i have to go I just think it's funny how you mentioned that your version of cDream is nicer than canon, when in my fics I always work to make him even Worse by leaning into the "sick fuck who takes joy in torturing a child" aspect of his character. Like in hwhbh, he's just a Grosser person. He's written as a smug, petty, vindicative manbaby who, as soon as he's robbed of his armor and weapons and put in that cell, all the Classy Mysterious Elegance he held himself with just Drops. He's ofc a guy in a hostile oppressive environment that's fucking with his already shit poor mental health, and once XD goes in and throws his brain into the God Blender Torture Matrix Palinko, he's literally a husk of who he was and can barely make sense of where he is half the time. But there's still the constant undercurrent of Tommy Tommy Tommy in his thoughts. he's a cDream's who fear-fueled hatred of the boy is what he wears on his sleeve, because when robbed of his capacity to cause harm, all that's left is a sad, pitiful little man who felt like his world was being threatened by a literally child and resorted to torture and barbaric cruelty about it.

I mean like to be fair once you get a literal god torturing you I think niceness goes out the window. And like fair for him what XD is doing is like. Not Okay? Don’t torture people. (And this isn’t a criticism of your work, I think it’s some really good characterisation of XD. We know he’s ruthless and cruel to people he dislikes, so it’d make sense for him to be so towards someone who hurt someone he deeply cares for).

The way I write c!Dream is that he's like, fully and completely genuine about his desires for a big happy family and friendship, because I think that’s an excellent thing to explore in my horror work. So he's entirely genuine when he’s being kind to c!Tommy. He is being manipulative intentionally, yes, but when he says he cares about c!Tommy and enjoys spending time with him it’s the whole truth. He'd happily spend all day playing games and chatting with c!Tommy as much as he'd happily torture and experiment on him because he genuinely sees c!Tommy as a brother. He adores him in the same way c!Wilbur does, the same way c!Tubbo does, yet it’s horribly twisted. The kindness is fully genuine, and so is the cruelty. I think c!Dream is a lot worse if he's incredibly kind… and still a gleeful torturer who views that torture as kindness. He’s painfully human and he thinks he’s a good person. He has so many virtues yet used in ways worse than any vice. He's the dark side to every light.

[ao3feed-crimeboys]

Forgiveness, Can You Imagine?

by SunlitStruggles

A man comes back from the dead after being left to rot in a special hell that was made for him by the universe. Upon being revived, he is checked in to an esteem mental wellness center where he will begin his recovery. All the while he mediates on the events that led up to his death, on grief, pain, fear, loneliness. Regret. This is a story about a main who rots in his regret Can this sorry mess of a man forgive himself enough to recover? Can a man who hated himself to the point of wanting to die learn to love himself? Can life-ruining actions be forgiven? Can he be good? Can he fix it?

Well, this story isn't about answer. It's more about the maybes. And maybe this sad sack will be okay when it's all over. Maybe. Here's to hoping.

-This fic is a fully canon spin-off to my work "Heal What Has Been Hurt", a canon divergent AU. While this fic can be read on its own, many aspects of its story will not make sense without context of the main story. It takes place immediately after the events of chapter 101 and follows hwhbh!Wilbur's perspective of events going from there.

Words: 2850, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 9 of Heal What Has Been Hurt+ Connected Works

Fandoms: Dream SMP

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: Gen

Characters: Wilbur Soot, Ghostbur (Dream SMP), TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), DreamXD (Dream SMP)

Relationships: Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, DreamXD (Dream SMP) & Wilbur Soot, Ghostbur (Dream SMP) & Wilbur Soot

Additional Tags: Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, Traumatized Wilbur Soot, Mental Health Issues, Hallucinations, Blood and Gore, Recovery, Mentioned Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Phil Watson is Wilbur Soot's Parent, Bad Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Author Is Not a Phil Watson Apologist (Video Blogging RPF), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Sympathetic Wilbur Soot, Depression, Anxiety, Avian Wilbur Soot, Author is a TommyInnit Apologist (Video Blogging RPF), Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Wilbur Soot is Not Ghostbur, Original Character(s), Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

[flamedoesart]

no but you need to understand, Flame. HWHBH!Wilbur is a man who was raised in a very(by our world's standards of culture/politics) conservative environment. He is not familiar with various labels and identities and what not outside of the sparse handful he's been able to learn about throughout his pre-SMP travels.

HWHBH!Wilbur is a whore. A professional whore. My man's knows sex, but he don't know much else.

Heal!Wil has ZERO CONCEPT of what a platonic/queerplatonic relationship is. He just...doesn't know, because the concept was never introduced to him.

My man's is gonna come out of Limbo on the ol' "I'M ALIVE, I'M REVIVED, I SURVIVED" high, see beeduo being smoft on tommy, watch some tall prissy enderian kid make ~moves TM~ on his baby brother, aaaaaaaand then I think the poor guy will need to lay down for like. 800 years. because like.......how the fuck do you process that?

the old elder queer whore man's white streak isn't from revival it's from the stress of worrying for his baby brother. oh the poor guy. the poor poor thing

dude is like "omg ppl love my brother" and then he passes tf away

[sunlitmcgee]

this is the last thing I'm goinna be able to write for the rest of the day because I don't think I can physically write more after That

and of course, the parents. the parents of the children who have to fight against this admin and his army because there's hardly any other adults around to help. we've got like 5 other people who know how to use a sword. he has to talk to the parents. of course. of course he has to turn and talk to the parents while their kids all play together outside and run around in their little uniforms. He has to talk to the Parents.

[sunlitmcgee]

they're talking about heal!tommy

[sunlitmcgee]

Just a reminder, since he's on the brain. The way I wrote cWilbur at the start of HWHBH was fueled by a cocktail combo of misunderstanding his character, wrongly projecting some personal traumas onto him when I should've done it on cDream, as well as ableism, much of which was internalized. I started writing Heal when I was still in highschool. I was younger. I was stupid.

I haven't gone back to edit those writings because they are writing from the POV of heal!tommy(the child who was hurt/traumatized by his older brother's behavior) and heal!XD(the haughtily dilf god whose views of people are warped by their self-righteous rage).

I still write HWHBH!Wilbur as a former abuser in the fic, because in the context of this fic's AU, he WAS abusive during Pogtopia, unlike his counterpart in canon. That abuse was largely fueled by his mental health at the time, but I'm sure we all are aware here that mental illness doesn't excuse abusive behavior, it just offers insight and an explanation to it. His story is one of someone who comes to recognize how his behavior was bad, what he did wrong, who he wronged, and how to work on his current behavior and properly apologize for his past actions. HWHBH!Wilbur is someone who WAS abusive. But unlike a certain green prick, he has enough of a conscious to recognize and actually feel bad about it. He Can Be Better. He Can Heal. I Will Force Him Too.

though also please remember, while I the author am now much easier on cWilbur, heal!XD in character is just as pissed and petty as always. They put that man into Limbo. I am having to work with a character who was written when I help some very different and very stupid opinions. I'm sure you can all. imagine. the Struggle of It.

but yea.

just wanted to remind yall of that. becuz yea

[sunlitmcgee]

im writing like. chunks of this wedding chapter. just bits at a time to slot into place until I have the energy to actually write stuff out. and wilbur's Happy. he's happy and he's Proud of himself. he's proud at how well he's doing and at how far he's come since revival. it's the 16th, but it's a day of love and building something New this time instead of a day of tearing something down to the ground. his baby brother's gettng platonic gay married. im gonna cry actually

[sunlitmcgee]

hwhbh!XD and hwhbh!Wilbur have done terrible terrible things but they're so stubborn and scared that they refuse to fully face all the work that'll come from having to fix them.

the only difference is one is a god and the other is a little osprey man.

[sunlitmcgee]

I think of hwhbh!wilbur's personal road to recovery as a sort of self-inflicted vivisection. He's given the tools with which to cut his chest open so he can look inside and see exactly what's Wrong. It's not all unsalvageable. There's love in there. There's goodness inside of him. There's grace. But there's also plenty that's gone rotten, rancid flesh and open pores that he's got to put in the effort into sealing up, healing not concealing, if he really wants to stop the gradual decay. It's not pretty or soft or tender in the way he wants, but it's what he needs and he knows that. So fetch him the bone saw.

[sunlitmcgee]

yeah. all those people who were shit talking heal!wilbur because ghostbur was around with Shroud? Very young adults who grew up in L'manburg during and after the war. yeah. Yeah...

[sunlitmcgee]

Oh! BTW, in case anyone was wondering how it is in HWHBH that an osprey avian man and a salmon merfolk lady were able to make a humanoid fox hybrid, the answer is simple: HWHBH!Sally had a lot of fox hybrids in her family tree on her mom's side.

It's just funky hybrid race genetics being funky.

[sunlitmcgee]

heal!crimeboys both deal with intense paranoia but with Wilbur he feels like everyone is going to abandon him while Tommy is fully convinced his platonic bf is on his way to turn him into soup. Brothers,,,

[sunlitmcgee]

ahhhh.

101 and 102 were both very good

I actually greatly enjoy how you've gone about stuff with wilbur, alot of people write his character as all bad or all good in the smp setting so it's very nice to see that while yes, there were reasons for his actions and he was mentally ill he still needs to be held responsible for his actions (also you *didn't* kill ghostbur/pos)

102 I liked bc like. kids have arguments with their parents. even if a parent was just trying to do what they thought was right and the kid doesn't agree. parents mess up and their kids lash out. it was actually kinda nice to see with them (also Allium duo who are litterally my favorite duo and my favorite characters individually)

I'm really happy you enjoyed both of them! When writing 101, my greatest worry was leaning too far into either of the "cWilbur is all evil VS cWilbur is totally pure" sides of fandom characterization, and I'm glad that I was able to get his status as a victim who has still caused harm he needs to make up for across like I intended.

102 was similarly difficult(as is the next update I'm working on right now), because so much of heal!Tommy and heal!XD's characters are based around their relationship being so stable as a source of comfort. XD is the one Tommy always goes to for comfort when he's unwell, and Tommy is XD's source of motivation. So having conflict between them really risks having the whole story fall apart. But as you say, sometimes parents mess up. And sometimes a child needs comfort from someone other than their parent when their parent is the one who made them upset.

Tommy's feelings on this situation will be explored just as much as XD. But I'm sure it's obvious who needs more time in the light VS who needs to learn something from all of this.

in this house we cherish ghostbah & do not kill him because that is TOO SAD!!!!! I am very very happy that you enjoyed both of them <3

[sunlitmcgee]

Uh. How much does Ghostbur look like wilbur in hwhbh after he becomes alive(gets revived? I don't know the term for this scenario)?

I am actually considering making them in the Sims 4 to have a visual of that, anon! But until then(and until the next update in which he will be fully described), I'll just say they look similar enough to be mistaken for being related, like twin brothers!

[sunlitmcgee]

to this day I really feel that hwhbh!wilbur's thought of "and I'm the biggest slut this side of the crystal sea!" in the valentine's day special fic really doe set the tone for his entire character. he is a whore and he wears that title with pride and he cries in the olive garden bathroom because he said something hurtful on accident and worries he's ruined everything with Tommy all over again, because really it was already ruined, he fucking died and killed himself and got murdered by their dad and blew it all up, he legit fucking blew it, he is a failure of a big brother and a failure of a man. maybe 20+ canes of 7-UP will fix him if he watches some studio ghibli. maybe.