#hunting husbands

[fireflysugarpie]

I think it would be funny if Shang Qinghua and Shen Qingqiu decided to get married, not for tax purposes per se, but for marriage/sex curse immunity. secretly, of course ;)

why would they do this, you may ask? why wouldn't they? excluding aphrodisiacs, there are plenty of curses and/or magical objects just laying around the SVSSS world just waiting for an unsuspecting Peak Lord to trip over them. And since Shen Qingqiu has decided to travel to see all the worldbuilding and cool flora/fauna he missed out on in the original PIDW, he's dragging Shang Qinghua along with him for the ride. Of course, they would need protection against the more serious afflictions they could catch or be caught by, and getting married was the perfectly logical solution!

and if they ended up getting sex-pollened and needed to rail each other anyway? if they both said no-homo after, then it didn't count! and if they had started to sleep in the same bed and woke up in each other's arms, that's because it's cheaper than getting separate rooms! Who cared that Shang Qinghua started to sleep over at Shen Qingqiu's peak when they were both back at the sect? And brought him gifts and food? And that he reciprocated? They were obviously just hanging out as friends.

And friends are supposed to be affectionate and show care towards each other! They're the only transmigrators in this world, so they need to stick together! Watching the other jerk off can be a bonding activity, you know!

And if Shen Qingqiu noticed one day that they stopped saying no-homo? They already know they aren't gay, so it would be redundant to keep saying it. Carding your fingers through your fake (real) husband's hair while he lays in your lap and complains about the merchant's trying to weasel out of a deal with the sect is completely straight behavior!

[bloodydancy]

Hannibal (2013-2015) | The Hunt (2012)

[yashley]

vex & pike in c3e112

[hemlock-dreams]

Your Kraven post you just made is making my brain spin like a microwave going at Mach speed like 1. Hot 2. Very hot 3. The mental image of Wade having a jealous no good very bad time over Spidey and Kraven is absolutely hilarious. I can only Imagine the hijinks and chaos

Wade does not like Kraven. Kraven does not get to pass go. He does not get to collect $200.

[li77ard]

I hear you call my name

And it feels like home

[cannibalismposting]

Beauty of this man makes me speechless

[aq2003]

has anyone gotten the idea that odysseus' storyline in hades 2 is a depiction/exploration of trauma over his SA and how he's blaming himself for things that were out of his control? because that's the impression i'm getting from what i've seen. he talks about "goddesses" as his "greatest weakness" and that "he's not one to say no to them"...

when mel invites him to the bath, he brings up mortals having different standards for intimacy than gods and how it usually has a more romantic/sexual connotation. she then asks if he's uncomfortable and he has a startled reaction and brings up circe and calypso again (but never actually by name)

(this isn't ship/romance bait btw. odysseus knew mel as a kid and they're stated in-game to have a sibling/uncle-niece relationship)

also he grew apart from penelope after his return, but the game makes a point of showing that his love for penelope and telemachus is what drove him on at all so that element of his character isn't brought into question

[coachbeards]

#married.

bonus:

[mrghostrat]

Editor's Note (1/5) (M)

In which two of the least romantic men on earth try to write a romance novel.

“Now, what I was saying, before your little tantrum—” Crowley stuck his tongue out, and Aziraphale ignored him, “—is that, perhaps, this might be call for a retreat?” He slowly pulled his tongue back in, frowning from behind his sunglasses. He arched a brow to make sure Aziraphale would see it. “What, lock me in a windowless hotel room until I finish the book?” he scoffed, entirely joking. “If that’s what it takes,” Aziraphale replied, entirely serious.

i've decided to try out this posting schedule! so here's chapter 1 of my editor AU, lemme know what you think, and i'll be back with more chapters once the rest of the fic is written 🎉

[the-bi-fangirl-biatch]

"aziraphale didn't want the kiss! it was non consensual!!!!"

then what, pray tell, does THIS mean?????

it's not that he didn't want it, he regretted that it had to be that way. the trembling, the hands pressing to his lips like he wants to feel it again, to savour it. it's supposed to be romantic but it's just heartbreaking.

[bipolargreen]

Crowley just wears his damn heart on his sleeve 💔💗💗

[ms0milk]

thinking about mithrun dunmeshi who could incapacitate most opponents in hand-to-hand (update: he’s a trained knife-fighter!) but chooses to use extremely fastidious teleportation magic without blinking at how easy it would be to accidentally blow himself or everyone involved, friend or foe, all the way up

(and finding something in all of his lackthereof, to smile about here which only ever happens one more time SPARE me SPEAR me anything love this guy forever)

[serpentface]

Scenes from The Baby Wars Part One: The First One

[Hibrides never wanted to be a mother (though the concept of childbearing has always occurred to her as 'inevitable and necessary'), underwent very severe post-partum depression, never really bonded with the infant, and was extremely uncomfortable with nursing her (they had a wet nurse who covered most of it).

Brakul ended up being the Designated Housewife throughout Erubi's infancy and was effectively the only member of the household providing parental care, was Extremely bitter with Hibrides for not really wanting anything to do with her daughter (among other things), and was raised in a context where fathers allowing their infants to comfort nurse on them is a standard practice (which is not widely conceptualized as a Thing men can do in the Wardi cultural sphere and comes off as bizarre to the rest of his household).

These combined factors lead to tense standoffs where he looms behind Hibrides trying to guilt her into Feeding The GodDamn Baby while looking, from her perspective, like he's trying his absolute hardest to breastfeed.]

[gahellhimself-blog]

Hey dear people in London!! Ready for another treasure hunt?

It’s hidden somewhere in St James :)

Leave Clues on my instagram today

[mischievous-thunder]

Person A: My love language is to get on your last nerve.

Person B: My love language is lying about my last nerve and secretly keeping a more flexible last nerve.

[li77ard]

impossible husbands