#hphmfictober2019

[shinyrockalaska]

True amortentia

Fictober day 11- "potions"

@hphm-fictober

Summary: MC always wanted to learn this potion, to discover who is their crush. But what if they don't have a crush?

Ft. AroAce MC :D

Word count: 1k

Enjoy~

***

You've waited for this day ever since hearing about it somewhere in your fourth year. It was probably the first time ever you were excited for potion class. It was stupid, but you truly believed that this class will help you find the truth. It did, actually. But it wasn't the truth you wanted.

Most people hated this potion lesson, amortentia. It was an embarrassing lesson for everyone, where Snape humiliated everyone by forcing them to say out loud what they smell. And he always knew if someone was lying.

But for you, it was the day you might finally be normal.

It wasn't always like that. When you were young no one excepted you to date anyone, of course. You were able to be silly and happy and love whatever and whoever you wanted. It's all just innocent and meaningless when you're a kid. But then puberty came and changed the rules. Boys and girls started to chase one another, looking for a significant other, like they were some kind of a prize to be won. They were all acting like idiots. Everyone, including your friends, started to get crushes and go on dates but you just never seemed to catch up to them. People tried to ask you out a few times, of course, but you had to decline all of their offers. They all asked why don't you have a significant other and you always said "I'm just more focused on studying/finding my brother/breaking the curse", but what you really wanted to say was "I don't know. I'm just not interested".

You couldn't help but feel like something might be wrong with you. All the adults you've known kept on saying on how're you going to be a great partner to your future husband/wife but you just couldn't see it. You thought maybe a healer would know how to change this, but madam Pomfrey, like everyone else, kept on saying that it's probably just a phase and you'll be a great parent to your kids in your future family.

The longer people kept on rambling about crushes, the more you were convinced that there is probably someone you like too, and just didn't knew yet. that's why you were excited to learn amortentia. To find out who you like.

Out of all your friends there was definitely some you could've pictured yourself living with. But did you really liked them? Now it was the time to find out.

As you put the last ingredient in the potion you couldn't help but smile. Now is the moment to find out the truth!

"Y/L/N, can you tell me what you smell?" Snape asked you, with a devilish smile.

You leaned in to smell the potion but were confused. "Well?"

"I- I think my potion don't work, I don't smell anything, maybe I messed it up ju-"

"How typical of you" Snape frowned, "Khanna, do you smell anything?"

"Yes professor", you heard them say as they leaned into the potion you both made. "It smells like new books, trees after the rain and uh-" they blushed and added quietly, "old papers and grass." well, it was no secret Rowan fancied Bill since forever.

"I swear it doesn't smell like anything to me!" You panicked, "there must be something wrong with the potion I-"

"Khanna smelled it, there must be something wrong with you then" you could hear Merula's voice from the other table. It was true, thought. Even cold hearted people like Ismelda and merula got crushes. You yourself helped Ismelda with her crush on Barnaby, and you knew Merula fancy your brother, so why can't your stupid heart-body-mind DO SOMETHING?

Some people started to laugh and you couldn't take it anymore. You were so disappointed to find out that the truth is you really don't like anybody, that you just run out of the class.

Outside in the hallways you accidentally bumped into someone, who happened to be Jae Kim who just got out of detention in the kitchens.

"Hey are you okay?" He asked, "aren't you supposed to be in class?"

"Where do you think I've got from?" You asked, annoyed.

"Potion class, ha?" He asked, "must've been amortetnia, right?"

You were surprised he guessed it so easily. "By your expression I guess I'm correct." He continued, "Yeah, people tend to leave this class early. Was it too embarrassing to reveal who your crush is?" He asked, only making you more emotional.

"If you must know" you said while rubbing your still teary eyes, "I don't have a crush. That's why I run out". he raised his eyebrow, "seriously? Why would you run then?"

"Because," you were surprised he didn't understand, "I'm a monster!"

"You literally help everyone, give your everything to strangers how does this makes you a monster? Not to like anyone romantically or sexually?" He wondered, but you continued. "I don't know Jae, but something is obviously wrong with me. Maybe I'm broken or numb or-" you breathed, "I don't know. Everyone around me seem so interested in sex and dating and I don't get it and I don't understand why I don't feel it and why my stupid amortentia smelled like nothing!"

"You don't have to be like everybody, though" Jae seemed to be chill about the situation you put him in, "you're yourself, and you're a very kind and loving person. You need to accept yourself, that's all. That's your amortentia."

"How do you know all that?" You asked, confused, as he shrugged. "I also don't like anyone. My amortentia smelled like myself"

"Didn't you felt like a narcissist, to tell the entire class you smell yourself in your amortentia?"

He shrugged again, "not really. I'm not ashamed of myself. You shouldn't be either." He smiled at you and you finally calmed down. There's nothing wrong with you. And you weren't alone. You smiled as you answered, "Wow, I never realized that I'm probably not the only one who feels this way, I- thank you Jae. For showing me the truth."

It's was like a new world. You suddenly understood that you did discovered something in this lesson. Not your crush, but your true self. Your amortentia.

[spaceacealyx]

Let’s Get Down to Business

HPHM fic/inktober day: 1. Courage

Words: 230

Summary: Sam’s conversation with Diego before their duel with a troll.

I’ve had this written for a little while since I had planned out all of October before @hphm-fictober posted their prompt list so I’m using the prompts from @hphminktober-2019 ‘s list, which you can find here.

“I can’t do this without you, Diego.”

Fighting a troll? Is he mad? Diego looks Samuel in the eye, worry clear on his face, but Sam just stares back, eyes full of determination.

Diego sighs. “You said this was to save Beatrice and the others, yes?”

Sam nods, no hint of jest or joke.

“Then yes, I will help. Even if I think this is a terrible idea…”

Samuel’s face lights up with a smile. “Thank you, Diego. I knew I could count on you.”

While Diego is still terribly reluctant about the entire “fighting a troll thing, Sam seemed so sure of himself, it was hard to disagree with him.

 Diego is late getting to the meetup point. The troll is impossibly big and impossibly destructive. He hesitates. This is a really bad idea.

“Diego!”

Sam is directing students away from the beast when Diego spots him. “Are you ready, mi amigo?”

Sam glances at him. “You know what to do.”

Diego watches him pull out his wand and move to block the troll with his own body from going after the students.

For a moment, Diego forgets that Sam is a sweet little Ravenclaw that stays in the hospital wing to help Madam Pomfrey and makes baked goods for his friends. His expression is fierce and determined, and it sends chills down Diego’s spine.

“Well… here goes nothing…”

[strangerdeer]

Ice + Fear

For Inktober day 7 + 8 I write a small fic! The post about the days HERE and follow @hphminktober-2019 and @hphm-fictober ! Staring at: Ben Copper and Tulip Karasu Word Count: 879

Ben stared down at the frozen lake, it was covered in blank ice. If he leaned forward, he would have the luck to see some mermaids swimming down in the deep of the lake. But all he could see was the ice, and a faint of his reflection that wore the red hat and the jacket he got from his dad. “So cold,” those words he had said when he was stuck in the Ice. All he could remember was the freezing feeling, numbness. Not being able to breathe normally and teeth chattering so much he thought they would fall out. But at one point while he was stuck, he felt a warmness, it started to get hot and it burned. The teachers had to move him quickly to Hospital Wing after they freed him. 

“Are you seeing something funny Ben Copper?” It was now years since that happened. Only sixth year and seventh year, then Ben would leave this school and find a more peaceful place. “Or are you scared?” Ben looked behind him, it was Tulip. He and Tulip wasn’t the closest of friends. They knew each other, could talk once in a while. Nothing more than that, seeing her by herself at the lake was a difference. She wore a Ravenclaw hat, matching with the Ravenclaw scarf that she had swung around her neck and covered half of her face. 

“I’m not scared of it,” Ben said coldly. “it is just a frozen lake.” “Oh yeah I forgot, the rumours of you not being scared anymore,” Tulip got closer, the footsteps she took made a soft noise in the snow. “when did you sign off the contract?” “When Rakepick left us to die.”

The red haired girl nodded slowly, avoided the eye contact and kneeled down to the snow. Her grey gloves wrapped a good amount of snow and pressed the snow together. “Yeah, a real bitch she was,” she sighed. Ben knew that Tulip never trusted Rakepick in the first place. It must been difficult to be friend with someone who trusted Rakepick and did everything she told them to do. “Do you ever think about the Vaults?” Tulip asked before Ben could think of something else. “like…. when we faced them?” “You mean when we were affected by them?” “Yes… that. I mean, you were one of the first students who got stuck in-” “I don’t need to be reminded,” Ben cut off Tulip. She looked up from the snowball she had made in her hands and stretched herself up. “Sorry. I thought it was that the reason you stared at the lake.” “It isn’t your business of that.” Tulip nodded and walked closer, standing next to Ben, staring out at the lake. She still hugged the snowball in her hands. Ben could see that Tulip was thinking of something but chose not to ask. If she had something on her mind she could tell it by herself.

Tulip let the snowball fall in to her right hand, pulling back her hand and tossed the snowball far out on the lake. It landed on the ice and broke in to the small snowflakes spread across the ice. “Sometimes I have the nightmares of You-Know-Who,” Tulip broke the silence. “all because of the boggart curse. Which comes to my mind too often, and the sleeping curse-” “Perhaps you should move on and not live in the past,” Ben glanced over to Tulip. “Because it worked for you?” “Because we aren’t children anymore. And living in the past won’t make you grow up.” A faint smoke came out from Tulip’s mouth as she sighed. “It seems we needed to be adults as first we got here to Hogwarts.” “That was never shown on you,” Ben turned over to Tulip. “foolish pranks and running around. Of course you can’t stop thinking of the past if you keep doing the same old thing.” “It is for fun,” Tulip snorted, glared at him. “It is foolishness, we are graduating in two years, do you think you can live in the same old shoes for the rest of your life?”

Ben wasn’t in the mood to have a argument and turned on his heels, burying his nose in the jacket and having his hands in the pockets as he made his way to Hogwarts. Tulip stood still, looking at the lake and thought back to the Vaults. To what Ben have said. A weird feeling came to her, a worrying kind of feeling. She won’t be young forever, the only thing that made her happy was the pranks, not needing to worry about anything. But soon she is going to face the world, just like she has done at Hogwarts. A small smile was on her lips, pressing against the scarf. She was going to face the world but the world is going to face her as well. And they would need to be prepared for that. Tulip looked behind, seeing Ben haven’t made it far and rushed over to him. “Ben!” A couple of shouts for him made him turn around and look at her, the scarf had fallen down and he could see a big grin on Tulip’s face. “Wanna grab a butterbeer?” she said between her breaths.

[spaceacealyx]

A Begrudging Realization

HPHM fic/inktober day: 13. Festivity

Words: 700

Summary: Ismelda carves a pumpkin. Then someone joins her.

Ismelda forces the knife into the gourd while rolling her eyes. “Okay, Merula. I get it… hey, hand me that scoop.”

“Get it yourself. I’m going to check out that room. It’s gotta have something in it that can lead me to the next vault…” Merula gets up from her spot at the Slytherin table in the great hall and starts to bite the nail of her thumb. “I wonder if…” As she moves away, her muttering slowly fades into the din of the room.

Ismelda stands up and leans over the pumpkin to reach the tool and plops back down. “Couldn’t even… fuckin vaults… all she talks about…” As she’s grumbling to herself, she scoops the pumpkin insides out and onto the paper beside her.

“Oh, are you carving a pumpkin?”

Ismelda internally groans and looks at whoever is bothering her. Penny Haywood. Of course, just her luck. “What do you want, powderpuff princess? I’m busy.”

Ismelda’s harsh tone rolls right off Penny. “I love carving pumpkins! Mind if I join you?”

“No, not at all,” she says, her words dripping with sarcasm.

“Great!”

Penny sits beside Ismelda, and Ismelda can feel her lip curl upward in a snarl.

“My mom always has us carve the hole at the bottom, so it lasts longer.” Penny is either ignoring Ismelda’s distaste or doesn’t notice. Typical…

“What kind of face do you have planned for this one?”

The question distracts her from her pettiness. “Uhh… I don’t know.”

“I usually like to make mine goofy. Here, like this.” Penny picks up the carving knife and makes several little marks in the pumpkin. The teeth are uneven and missing a few, but it’s cute. Ismelda stares at the pumpkin’s face. When she notices she’s been silent for too long, she clears her throat.

“Whatever. Just give me the knife.”

Penny smiles brightly at her and Ismelda’s ears grow hot. “Sure. Here you go. Careful, don’t cut yourself.”

Ismelda takes the utensil, feeling slightly… odd about Penny’s genuine concern. “Pfft… yeah, whatever.” She starts to carefully cut out the face and Penny begins to talk about anything and everything.

“I just love fall. All the leaves change colors, and my mum and I have a tradition where every year, we make pumpkin spice cake bars and share them with our neighbors. My mum sent me some the other day since I’m not at home. I wonder if I would be able to make them here with a few friends…”

As Penny rambles, Ismelda gradually starts to tune her words out. She looks up at some point and Penny is so excitedly engrossed in her story, all Ismelda’s brain can think is, “She’s cute…” The thought is so sudden and absolutely crazy, it startles her. Ismelda doesn’t have much time to dwell on it because she notices Penny is looking at her expectantly. She must have asked her a question.

“Huh?”

Penny smiles her adorable smile again. “I asked if you would want to help me make pumpkin spice bars if we’re allowed to.” Penny’s full gaze is on her, and Ismelda almost doesn’t know how to deal with it.

Her body language changes to try to be casual, though it’s obvious it got through to her. She scoffs, “I mean… it’s not like we’re friends or anything… So… don’t count on it… or anything…” Ismelda’s ears are slightly pink again.

Penny stares at her with an odd expression for a moment before smiling again. The softness of it makes Ismelda’s heart flutter. “I’ll let you know if I do end up doing it. I hope we can…”

Ismelda hums in acknowledgment and goes back to what she was doing before. Only now, Ismelda sneaks glances at Penny as she speaks. She notices how Penny’s eyes light up with joy when she talks about something she’s excited about and her voice pitches up when she’s happy. What surprises Ismelda about it is that Penny gets this excited even when the only person she’s talking to… is Ismelda herself. It makes butterflies appear in her stomach and her only thought is, “Maybe Penny isn’t that bad.” Merlin forbid anyone finds that out though…

[spaceacealyx]

Troubled Souls

HPHM fic/inktober day: 2. Ambition

Words: 320

Summary: A little explanation as to why Sam is so determined to become a healer.

Again, I’ve had this written for a little while so I went by the prompt list that you can find here from @hphminktober-2019 but @hphm-fictober also has some cool prompts and many more cool fics.

“Jacob? Hey Jacob… I made a cake. Do you want a piece?”

Sam leans his ear against the door to listen for Jacob’s reply. He hears sniffling and cursing. “Go away, Sammy. Not right now.”

Sam frowns. He cracks the door open slightly, silently. Jacob is hunched over the sink.

“Shit…”

Concern takes over and Sam opens the door all the way, running over to his brother. “Jacob, are you-“

“Get out! Now!”

Sam stops but doesn’t move to leave. “Are you hurt? Wh-… can I help?”

“No- Just… Get out!”

Sam flinches at J raising his voice. “But-“

“Now!”

He shrinks in on himself and nods. “Okay…” With that, he leaves, closing the door behind himself.

He could feel tears prickling in his eyes. What was going on? Is J okay? Why can’t he help?

Sam sits and waits for Jacob at the dining room table. He stares at the lumpy strawberry cake (which is still a feat for a seven-year-old without supervision) in front of him and frowns. He stays there until J comes out of the bathroom and sits at the table across from Sa. They sit in silence for a few minutes. Sam knows not to push Jacob for answers. Finally, J sighs.

“I’m fine Sam. I just… nicked myself on something. It’s not a big deal.”

Sam frowns but doesn’t press. Only, “Well then… I’ll just become a healer when I go to Hogwarts like you. So then, when you get hurt, I’ll be able to fix it for you.”

Jacob stares at him with a strange expression before taking a deep breath in and looking at the cake. “Looks good Sammy…What do you say about cutting into it?”

Sam smiles brightly and shoots up to get the plates and utensils.

 Years later, after Jacob has long forgotten their conversation that day, Sam asks Madam Pomfrey to help him study to become a healer.

[shinyrockalaska]

Good-bye

Fictober day 9- farewell

I feel like I'm the only one following the official prompts 😅 but anyway...

@hphm-fictober

"Do we really have to say goodbye to Bill?" You asked as you and your friends got ready for the last day of the school year, "I mean can't he just stay?"

"It's time for graduation." Said Charlie, but it didn't cheer you up. "Why do goodbyes have to always be so sad?" You said while combing your hair.

"It's not always sad actually," Rowan cut in and said, "most of the times it is, but there are still some happy goodbyes too."

"like what exactly?" Asked Ben, "I can't think of any happy goodbyes."

"Weren't you excited to go to Hogwarts?" Rowan pointed out, "I know I was. That's why it wasn't sad for me to say goodbye to my parents. We were all happy that I finally got to go to Hogwarts. I was excited to learn all those new things and meet new people and see y/n again"

"Honestly, me too" Charlie, Penny and Tonks agreed.

"I was happy to get away from my family" said Barnaby, "they didn't cared much so it wasn't sad."

"Same for me," said tulip, "my parents were busy anyway, and I was happy to get away from all of their strict rules"

"I was terrified to go to Hogwarts and you know it" said Ben, finally. "I cried a lot and wanted to stay at home. My parents somehow convinced me to go, even though it was sad for them too.."

"But I guess.." he continued, "I was happy to leave my muggle school. People were mean to me and it was nice for once to feel like I'm somehow better than them."

"See?" Rowan said to you, "happy goodbyes do exist."

"You're right." You finally agreed, "Let's go and make this the happiest goodbye Bill ever had!"

[shinyrockalaska]

The breakup

Fictober day 6- "friends"

@hphm-fictober

Friendship is probably my favorite subject in the entire world. So simple yet soooo complicated, I have a lot of experiences with this so I wanted to write about the complicated parts.

A lot of people say they wished they could unfriend Rowan so I decided to write from her perspective on how would it feel if this would actually happen.

Word count: 1.2k

Enjoy!

~~

Looking at it now I guess I can't really put a finger on when it started. Or more accurate, when it ended. It took us months to actually talk about it. I guess I thought, I hoped, there would be nothing to talk about, though deep down I knew there was.

I guess it started with her avoiding me. Not always answering me, not always smiling at me. And it was okay, I thought maybe she wasn't in the mood. I guess I should've notice how affectionate she was towards her other friends, even when she wasn't in the mood to be affectionate towards me. It became difficult to me because I didn't knew what to do. We shared a room together and used to be very close. It was all very unlike her to act this way. Every time it was just the two of us she searched for an excuse to get out, even if it was late in the evening. It was strange, but I thought if I'll give her the space she clearly wants, it might help.

The moment that made me realize something might be seriously wrong was one morning, when we sat at the great hall and she referred to Bill as her best friend. I was surprised and hurt but didn't wanted to make a big deal out of it. 'It's okay', I thought, 'she is allowed to do whatever she wants, and I don't want to be seem so clingy..'

Later that day I asked Bill if he think MC might hate me. I thought he might knew, he's her new best friend, after all. He answered with a shrug and told me not to worry about it, that sometimes people just drift away from each other and it's all netural. He promised that she doesn't hate me, and even though it still sounded weird, I was still convinced it's all just a little phase.

The last straw for me wasn't the insults. Of course it hurts when your BFF (or maybe ex-BFF) mock you for not succeeding on casting an easy charm like lumos, but seeing her hang out with Merula was much worse.

At first I didn't want to believe it, that this is the kind of people who replace me. Bullies who clearly don't care about her as much as I do. That's when I decided we must talk.

I knew I was acting like a fool when our friends looked at me shoked as I loudly confronted MC in the empty courtyard, but it was too late to change it. One of our friends joked about her replacing them with Merula and ismelda and I took it too seriously, reminding them all of the awful things she used to do. MC fought back, saying how much Merula changed since we first met her, but I couldn't just forgive her after all the years she bullied the both of us. "I'm sorry," I said, "but she has a potential to make someone commit sucide." Maybe I went too far. Especially when I added, "she's probably a death eater".

MC was furious, "you don't even know her!" She screamed at me, but the worst part was when Penny and Bill agreed with her. It would've probably turn into a big fight if Ben wasn't starting to panic from all of the screaming and fighting, "please stop you're making me anxious" he said, and that was the end of the fight. Everyone started to make their way back to their dormitories, but I grabbed MC hand and asked her to stay. She was confused and didn't understood why should she stay, even after I stated how I wanted to talk to her about our friendship. "There's nothing to talk about", she shrugged but I insisted.

"Are we friends? I feel like we're so far away from each other, like I don't even know you anymore. And it's weird because we've been friends, best friends, since we started here at Hogwarts. Did I do something wrong..?" I slowly asked. She didn't answered so I continued, "It's crazy that you don't even want to talk about it. Friendship isn't a one-sided thing, you know.. so I guess I just really need to know, do you still care about me? Because, I still care about you..." My voice got more and more quite as I spoke. My thoughts were filled with regret as she answered me. "I care about you, but we did kind of drifted apart.. and it's okay! You don't have to feel bad about it, but Merula is my friend now too and I can't stand it when you talk shit about her. You're overthinking this whole friendship. It's supposed to be easy, and yet somehow you make it so difficult. We shouldn't even be talking about it. I've changed, and I must admit that the way you act annoys me sometimes. You're a good friend, you really are, but I have other friends now who I trust more."

This was a lot to take. And it hurted, a lot. I was probably lying when I said, "I never realized this is how you see it. I hope we'll get closer again, but even if not I'll be happy as long as you are." Because after our talk everything got even worse. MC must have told Merula about it because the next day she bullied me even more than before, insulting me with new words.

Now that we weren't friends anymore it was hard to keep the friendship with the other friends, because they were all her friends too. She acted as if nothing happened but I couldn't just pretend that it's alright, that I'm alright. It was hard for me to act the same when it felt like my entire world has just changed. I used to be fine with having no friends but it was hard to get used to it again after knowing how good it feels to have one. I don't know how I survived the next year at Hogwarts. We didn't shared a room anymore.

It was definitely hard, watching them all from the side, watching her finding her brother, saving the school and everything. But I did it. On the last day for me in Hogwarts as a student, I walked in the hallways, knowing after the summer I'll come back here as the youngest professor in history. I saw her, with all of my ex-friends and some others walking in my direction. It still felt weird to see them together and not be part of it. I shoot them an apologetic smile, planning to pass them quickly, when I heard her speak. "I heard your dream came true, Khanna. Congratulations, and good luck with all the trouble makers" she said, half joking. "Thanks" I said as I walked away, ready to leave the past behind.

It was my last day of school, and even though it was hard to see it sometimes, I was happy for everything that happened. If there's anything I've learned In life so far is that it's full of possiblities. And no matter how much things change, the memories are yours forever.

~~

Was it a good idea to use my past experiences and same hard conversation I had for the fic? Heck no! But I really really like how it turned out, Hope you enjoyed it too❤

Rowan is an amazing character and I wish people wouldn't hate them so much..

[shinyrockalaska]

stupid smile

Fictober day 22- "smile"

@hphm-fictober

Using @geronimo-scamander-spd great ideas again on this short Merula x Penny fic

###

Penny was so focused on brewing a potion she didn't noticed someone was glaring at her. Making potions was her favorite thing and so she smiled widely while Snape compliment her great brewing technique. Merula, on the side, frowned. Of course perfect Penny would succeed even this hard potion. 'That little teacher pet' she thought angrily. She had her own reasons to hate her. First of all, Penny was popular. And even though no one will never admits it- everyone wants to be popular. Secondly, she was friend with the cursed vault kid, probably the person Merula hated the most. And lastly, she was perfect. There was no other word to describe Penny because it was a known thing that she's in fact- perfect. Everything about her was. Her eyes, her hair, her smile. Merula gleared at her, smiling that stupid pretty smile of her..

"Psst, why are you smiling" Ismelda whispered to her, caughting her off guard. "What?! Shut up I was thinking."

"Thinking about someone? Penny, perhaps?"

Merula just rolled her eyes and then frowned. "Finish your potion instead of bothering me, won't you?"

Ismelda made an angry sound but turned back to work, leaving Merula alone.

She turned back to glar at Penny only to find her looking back at her. Merula eyes widened up as she watched Penny, surprisingly, smiling at her. It was the same perfect smile of her, that she smiled at potions, and flowers and other students and everyone and everything with but somehow it felt more personal this time.

Merula was so deep in her thoughts she didn't noticed Ismelda's hand on her shoulder. "Are you done drooling other Haywood there? The lessosn's over."

"For your information I was admiring her potion and definitely not her beutifu- I mean boring face" she growled back but as they walked out of the classroom Merula felt her face still warm and red, "oh no.." she thought and then frowned, "Penny and her stupid smile".

[strangerdeer]

courage

/ˈkʌrɪdʒ/

noun the ability to do something that frightens one; bravery. strength in the face of pain or grief. hphmInkotober2019 post! And I’m joining with small fics! follow @hphminktober-2019 for more stuff and see everyones beautiful art! 797 Words Staring at: Ben Copper

“Please, tell me. Why did you put me in Gryffindor?” Ben stood alone in Dumbledore’s office, waiting for the Headmaster to come and speak with him. But Ben saw the Sorting Hat, placed up high on the shelf. He stared at it for what seemed an entirety, hesitating to bring it down, wondering if he would get in trouble. But after a good amount of pushing himself, he took down the hat with the help of magic. It has been three years now since the cenemorny but Ben remember like it was yesterday.

He was scared. Thought about that it was all a mistake, he wasn’t a wizard, wasn’t supposed to be there. And he was around of the first ones called up to the hat, sitting on a chair and looking out in the ocean of students, wizards and witches. All looking at him, waiting for the hat to yell out what house he would be in. As the hat had made it on his head, too big for him so it had slid down over his eyes, he could hear a voice. “For those who wants to find a loyal friend can trust you,” the voice seemed to come from the hat, raspy and didn’t sound all clear as it had sung before. “I see a lot of talent in you and kindness, but I do see more of you.” And when the hat went silence and the only thing Ben could hear was his own heartbeat up in his ears, was the moment Ben thought it was all a big mistake. “Didn’t I tell you why I put you in Gryffindor?” Ben let out a yelp, almost dropped the hat to the ground. He had been staring down at it while being lost in his thoughts. The old hat didn’t seem to be bothered that he had give Ben a fright, not that Ben could tell the hat’s face expressions anyway. “Perhaps you did,” Ben said after a long silence, mumbling out the answer. “but I think you made a mistake. I am not brave as you said I was. I am not anything like a Gryffindor. I… I am scared.” “I might say,” was a voice heard that made Ben turn around and looking at one of the portraits. “you are the most frighten Gryffindor I have ever laid my eyes on.” The portrait wrinkled his nose as he looked up and down on Ben. Ben’s eyes flickered a bit. If a portrait, old as the Hogwarts itself, even said he never seen more frighten Gryffindor then the Hat must have done something wrong. “How often do you see a Gryffindor taking down me from my shelf?” Ben looked slowly back at the hat in his hands. “Or how often do you see a Gryffindor dare to say I made a mistake? You might haven’t heard Phillipus, but Ben Copper was one of the students who faced the Cursed Vault, the ice vault. Trapped in it the second year but still went to defeat the curse along side with his friends.” Ben looked down on the floor, remembering those terrible memories, he still get nightmares by them. Have woken up in cold sweat, shaking, almost out of breath when he wakes up. Holding back the gags as the tears would slip down, making sure to not wake anyone else up. “Ben Copper,” Ben jolted and turned on his heel quick to face Headmaster Dumbledore. “Oh sir! I was just talking,” Ben looked down on the hat who seemed fairly quiet now. But Dumbledore raised his hand slowly. “No need to make apologies, Mr Copper,” Dumbledore said softly. “we all doubt our paths once or twice in our lifetime.” “So you heard me?” Ben tugged his fingers to the hat, avoiding eye contact, he have been taught if you look at the middle of the space between the eyes it looks like you make eye contact. A method he use often to actually avoid Snape’s death glares. “Indeed I did. And I can tell you, you aren’t the only one who doubt if they were put in the right House. But in the end you fit perfectly in the House.” “How could I fit in? I am the least bravest person in Gryffindor.” Dumbledore let out a humming sound as he made his way towards the desk. “The ability to do something that frightens you, that is bravery. And I will be real with you Mr. Copper.” The old man sat down slowly in the chair as Ben took small steps to the front desk. Dumbledore tilted his head down to look at Ben over his half-moon glasses, having a small smile. “You do a lot of things that you considering is scaring you.”

[spaceacealyx]

Friendship Bracelets

HPHM fic/inktober day: 4. Creativity

Words: 400

Summary: I wanted to show my fankid Jade’s relationship with her sibling Robin and her friend Thibault Landon (who is the fankid of @neonbluewaves )

Again, I used this prompt for inspiration.

Jade huffs. “I don’t see why you want me to do this so bad.”

Robin looks up from their bracelet in progress with a pout. “Because Jade. It’s fun and I wanted to hang out… I guess you could leave if you really wanted to I just thought… I don’t know, maybe we could still hang out even though we aren’t with the entire family…” they look pitifully back to their work and Jade throws her head back, groaning in frustration.

“Okay, fine. I don’t see why we have to make stupid things like these though…”

Robin allows themselves a small smile. Jade does care, no matter how much she acts like she doesn’t.

Jade looks through all the different colors. “This is stupid. Why am I doing this?” She looks at her sibling again. Robin is always so sweet. It reminds Jade of Thibault. He would probably love this mushy shit… She goes back to looking through the colors and picks out three bundles of thread- one blue, one purple, and one pink- and sets to work.

“So… uh… Robin, I’m sure Dad has asked but how’re your grades and… stuff?”

“Morning, Jade.”

Jade is trying to tie up her wet hair as she sits down next to Thibault for breakfast. “Hey.” She leans forward onto the table and looks tiredly at Thibault. That’s when she remembers the bracelet she made him and she perks up. “I have something for you!”

He’s in the middle of taking a bite of his food but stops to look at her. “Huh?”

She digs around in her pocket and fishes out the flimsy string bracelet. “Robin made me make one with them, and it’s kinda weird to make them for yourself so… here.” She holds it out to him, the tips of her ears growing hot.

He looks at it for a moment before smiling and taking it from her. “Thanks.”

Jade shrugs. “Don’t mention it.”

Jade doesn’t give it much thought and starts piling food onto her plate. Little does she know that Thibault will stare at it later when he’s alone, thinking back to when no one had wanted to become his friend and how taking a chance to come out of his shell paid off. The bracelet is a physical representation of the friendship he and Jade developed and therefore proof that his choice to stop hiding had a positive outcome.

[shinyrockalaska]

Fictober day 14- "dance"

@hphm-fictober

Just a short fic using @geronimo-scamander-spd 's idea ^^

~~

Ben walked back and forth in the lower floor. He was supposed to be happy, but couldn't help and feel more nervous than usual.

Y/N has just asked him out to the ball, and he agreed of course. Even though he didn't wanted to go to the ball he still secretly hoped the cursed vault kid would ask him out. Which is exactly what happened, so why was he so stressed?

Right. Because he's still himself, and being himself means being nervous and anxious and afraid and worried and-

Suddenly he realized a terrible thing. He does not know how to dance!

His nervous pace got faster as he panicked more and more not even noticing the person standing behind him until they touched his shoulder.

"AHH! Wha-" he turned Around confused, "Merula?! What do you want?" He frowned.

Merula rolled her eyes, "You're standing in my way"

"Oh. Sorry." He moved but Merula stayed still.

"Why were you mumbling so much anyway? Is it because you're going to the ball? Pathetic."

Ben really didn't had the energy to deal with her right now. "So what? The entire school is going to be there." He answered.

"Well, you're definitely gonna be so ridicul-"

"Look, Merula-" he cut her off, "my brain doing an amazing job so far on stressing me out so don't waste your time and just leave."

Merula raised her eyebrow, "wow could you lighten up a little?" She rolled her eyes again, "whatever. Bye loser" she walked away and Ben returned to his anxious pace, so deep in thoughts that he didn't noticed Merula was standing next to him, again.

"Fine." She said, making Ben startle, "fine, I'll do it."

Ben looked at her confused, "what?"

"I said fine, I'll do it." She said angrily, "I'll teach you to dance"

Ben didn't knew if he should take her seriously or not. "You're always bullying me. Why should I trust you?"

"Because you're pathetic and helpless and I hate hearing you speak so much so shut up and follow me."

She didn't left him time to consider it and already walked away. Ben decided to follow, knowing there aren't really other options for him.

And that's how he found himself standing in the empty training grounds under the moonlight with Merula in his arms. Turned out she was a really good dancer. It was a terrifying experience for Ben 'cause every bad move earned him an angry yell from Merula, but he managed to learn pretty quickly.

"I still don't understand why would you do that" Ben said when they were done, feeling much more relieved.

"I already told you, you're pathetic. And it's my duty as the most powerful witch at Hogwarts to help useless idiots like you" she said, "and besides, if I managed to teach you that means that I really am the best. At everything." She looked proud yet still a little angry.

"Well.. thanks. I didn't knew you're such a good dancer."

That last sentence made Merula frown, "well if you tell anyone about it I'll kill you for sure. Not like they'll believe you. but still."

Even in his fourth year Ben was still terrified of Merula. He nodded and choked on his words as he answered, "got it."

[shinyrockalaska]

My most dearest (and only) friend

Fictober day 8- "window to the past"

@hphm-fictober

Summary: Tulip and Merula friendship, ft. Dyeing Tulip's hair

Word count: 1.5k

Enjoy!

###

"I don't understand why are we doing this?" Merula wonderd as she and Tulip snuck out of their parents and caretakers sight and got out of diagon Alley. They were now walking in a muggle street looking to buy a hair dye.

"Because," explained tulip, "I want to rebel against my parents in a way they can't understand. And I want to look different, maybe more like myself."

Merula rolled her eyes, "you're a witch", she stated, "you have magic."

"They'll be able to undo it with magic" Tulip reminded her, "besides, then it wouldn't be exciting to sneak out to the muggle town with my dear friend!"

Merula groaned to the 'dear Friend' part, but Tulip knew she secretly liked it.

"So many colors! Would it really dye your hair?" Merula asked when they reached the store.

"I don't know.. you know I'm a pure blood and my parents never let me out of the wizarding world."

"So how do you even know muggles can change their hair color?" Merula raised her eyebrow, Wondering.

"Just because they don't let me out doesn't mean I don't sneak out!" Tulip answered with a mischievous look, "I met a lady with purple hair and she told me about those muggle hair dyes. Now quick, help me pick a color!"

"How 'bout bright green!" Merula suggested, half joking.

"What am I? A stupid Slytherin??" She joked back.

"Hey, I'm not stupid!" Merula frowned and then smiled, "fine, how about blue, then? Or bronze? Or both??"

"Nah, too much house pride. I'm trying to be unique here!"

"Then you'll have a hard competition against that nymphadora girl. She can basically change her look to everything, anytime she wants. Her hair too."

"Yeah, she's cool." Agreed Tulip

"How about pink? Like my eyes?" Merula looked at her, excited.

"I think I'm gonna go with red. It's unusual but still kind of normal. I don't want to get too much attention over my hair.."

"So now you're a Griffindor?"

Tulip laughed, "Maybe I'll dye my hair pink next time." She said, "now come on! We gotta go back before my parents will get suspicious!"

When they got back to diagon alley they had to say goodbye to each other and return separately to their parents and caretakers. Their Friendship was a seceret outside of Hogwarts. Even though Tulip parents couldn't really control her life in Hogwarts, she didn't wanted to take the risk. Merula's family was known as death eaters, and Tulip parents worked at the ministry of magic. Those two families were the opposite, but the girls were the same. That's why the entire summer Tulip had to lie to her parents and create the perfect friend for them, so they won't find out that all of the countless letters were actually from the girl of the Snyde family.

But now it was time to go back to Hogwarts, to their second year. The girls met inside the train (away from judging parents and caretakers) and decided when and where to meet that night, in order to dye Tulip's hair. "Just imagine tomorrow! Everyone would think it's a magic, and then a few days later they'll realize it's actually fixated!" Tulip was excited. "And then at Christmas or Halloween or whatever your parents would punish you" Merula rolled her eyes. "I'm a witch, remember? I can magically dye it back for the short period of time when I'm home" Tulip really did planned everything. "At least until summer break, I guess."

"Hope they'll still let you write me letters.. Summer would be boring without hearing from you.." Merula admitted, a bit embarrassed.

"Even if not I will find a way to write you! My most dearest and actually only friend" she giggled, making Merula smile, which was very rare. "You too" Merula said, "my only friend. And dearest too" she added quietly. It wasn't expected of Tulip to be all cheesey about their friendship. It was also very surprising of Merula to be so honest with Tulip. But this is how it was. "Awwwww Merula has feelings, how cute!"

"I- I'm not cute! Stop it!" Merula groaned, "why are we even Friends, you frick"

"Because," Tulip started to explain, "you insulted me for standing outside of filch office, cause anyone who's standing there like an easy target for filch is obviously an idiot. But then the dungbomb exploded and I ran. You ran after me because you're not an idiot. When we got to the hidden spot I planned before, you were shocked and insulted me even more, saying how you would kill me if we'll get caught. You were so mad that I got you into trouble, and I had to remind you that I didn't asked you to come and insult me in the first place. When you saw that everything's okay, the impossible thing happened and you were impressed. Then we started to talk and spend more time together as you asked everything you could about all the tricks and pranks I've done. And that's basically it. We're an odd couple of friends, I'd say, but I like it."

"You really didn't had to tell me all of that. I know how me met. I was there"

Tulip shrugged "I just wanted to annoy you and you know it."

They had to separate for the start-of-term feast but right after dinner they both snuck out to the second floor girls' bathroom to do what they planned. Luckily, moaning Mirtel was nowhere to be seen.

"So do I just put it on your hair or what?"

"I don't think so, the box says you need to mix the liquid with the other liquid.."

"Just like a potion. It's a good thing I'm the best at this class" Merula bragged as she mixed the ingredients together with the brush from the dyeing kit.

"Pretty sure it's that popular girl, Penny, but whatever"

"Shut up"

Tulip sat on a close toilet seat while she and Merula got ready to dyeing her hair. "Looks good, now it's time to dye!" Tulip anunsed, excited. "You need gloves, thought.. do you have any?"

"I thought you planned all of it! Why would I have gloves??"

"Fine, let's use socks then," Tulip suggested a creative solution.

"We don't have socks, we have tights."

"Then let's use yours, it's ripped and ruined anyway.."

"It's called fashion, you idiot. There's no way I'm using it!"

"Oh nevermind, there are gloves in the kit!"

"Well I hope I'm doing it right," Merula said as she started to dye Tulip's hair, "but honestly I have no idea what I'm doing and it smells really bad.."

"Maybe you should read the instructions, I don't wanna end up bald!"

"It'll be very rebellious, though. And you could fix it, you are a witch, after all."

"Just because we have magic doesn't mean we have to use it all the time.." Tulip disagreed with her, but Merula just rolled her eyes. "You're only saying it because you're afraid I'm gonna make you bald. Don't worry, it looks good actually."

About an hour later of them dyeing and chatting Merula helped Tulip wash her hair in the bathroom sink. They kept on talking while they waited for Tulip's hair to dry so they can see the hopefully not so awful result, ("why don't you just use magic to dry it fast?", "I wanna do it the muggle way!!") But fell asleep while waiting. The next day they woke up, late for all of their morning classes, but fully rested.

"Oh my- your hair looks great! So red! Awesome!" Somehow Merula was even more excited than Tulip. "It looks so weird and so.. fitting. I'm really happy of how it turned out!"

"Your eyebrows still black though" Merula joked but tulip didn't mind, "who cares! I have red hair! Wow!!!"

"Yeah you do! Dyed by the best witch at Hogwarts!"

"Come on," Tulip grabbed Merula's hand, "let's go outside to show off my amazing look!"

Almost everyone looked at Tulip that week. Other studen were very surprised by the permanent change. Some people were mean, some people complimented her, but for the entire week she was the topic. She decided that she didn't really liked all the attention, but when she was with Merula it was more enjoyable.

It was an experience they both liked. Merula was happy that Tulip had trusted her with such thing, and tulip was glad that it was Merula who helped her, because she really couldn't see anyone else who would do it as good as Merula did.

Since then, everytime she had to buy a new hair dye when the color faded or hair grew, she would think of Merula and would get tempted to buy the pink hair dye. Especially now, that they weren't really friends anymore after they both kind of betrayed each other. She wanted to show Merula that she's sorry and she does care. But each time she would end up buying the usual red colour. It was scary to make such a big change without Merula on her side.

Oh well, the future still might be bright, and so is Tulip's hair.

##

Yep, I suck at the ending...

I really really enjoyed writing for those two!! I'm definitely gonna write about them more, even after Fictober! ❤

[spaceacealyx]

Family Means Nobody Gets Left Behind Or Forgotten

HPHM fic/inktober day: 3. Loyalty

Words: 390

Summary: A little interaction between my fankids Jade and Robin

@hphm-fictober and the prompt is from @hphminktober-2019 which you can find here.

“But, no, okay, he’s got this smile that… ohh it’s so cute!”

Jade rolls her eyes. Robin liked to ramble about a new person about every other week. Today it happened to be some guy by the name of “Jeremy is just… amazing!” Jade gives them time to let it out. She can’t say no to this particular sibling for some reason. “And then! He smiled at me!” robin squeals, earning themselves a dirty look from Jade.

“Sorry… I’m just… He’s so…!

robin is so excited they can’t even finish their sentence.

“Yeah… I got that…” They smile at her and she can’t stay mad.

They gasp softly and Jade looks around to see what Robin is gaping at. “This must be the guy then…” He smiles at Robin and doesn’t even spare Jade a glance. Good.

“Hey., it’s Robin, right?”

Robin’s eyes grow wide. “You know my name?” It makes the boy chuckle.

“Well, I mean., yeah. You’ve got a cute face.” Robin blushes bright red. Jade is about to make a sarcastic remark and leave until the boy gives her a look.

“You mind, goth girl?”

Anger flares in Jade’s chest. The only person allowed to live after calling her that is-

“thank you, but my sister and I have to go. Have a nice day.”

Robin grabs Jade’s hand lightly and steers her away from the boy. Confusion fills Jade but she allows Robin to lead her around.

When Robin finally stops and turns around to look at Jade, Jade looks as confused as she feels.

“What?”

Jade raises her shoulders in a shrug, shaking her head and raising her eyebrows. “I-… I don’t know, I just… don’t you like him?”

They shrug. “He was being an ass to you. I care about you more. You are family after all. We gotta stick together.”

The statement is so nonchalant and matter of fact, Jade is at a loss for words. She feels the overwhelming emotions burn her throat, but she pushes it down and clears her throat. Jade shoves her hands into her pockets.

“M’kay than… Whatever you say.”

Robin smiles at her and starts walking beside Jade again. After a few moments, Jade silently pulls a hand out of her pocket and wraps her arm around Robin’s shoulders. The Hufflepuff smiles softly at her but says nothing.

[shinyrockalaska]

Fictober day 1: "so close"

Happy October everyone!

It's short and not really good but oh well

@hphm-fictober

------

This is not how you imagined the end of the fifth year would be. No, you imagined it being all happy, just you and your friends celebrating being done with your owls and newts with a side of sadness by saying goodbye to Bill who just graduated. Instead of it, everyone were depressed because of you and your brother, once again. Since coming to Hogwarts every year you got closer and closer to finding Jacob, and now you were definitely the closest. You hugged him! He hugged you! You were so close to finding him, yet sometimes almost isn't enough.

You were sitting in your bed now, at home. Summer vacation, yet you never felt so stressed. It was lonely at your house, but it was a loneliness you got used to. Still you wished it was different. You wished your brother wasn't so selfish, leaving you again two minutes after you finally found him, wasting all your years in Hogwarts just for him. After everything that happened you still wished for that feeling, the excitement of being so close to your brother that you loved. You still missed him.

[spaceacealyx]

History Class

HPHM fic/inktober day: 9. Repose

Words: 530

Summary: A little self-indulgent fankid fluff with Jade and @neonbluewaves‘ kids Lorena and Thibault Landon.

The prompt I used is from here.

Binns’ monotonous voice, paired with Jade’s lack of sleep the previous night, makes a very sleepy Jade. She yawns tiredly and leans on the person next to her, her girlfriend. Lore puts an arm around her, leaning into her as well.

Thibault looks up from his notes and snorts. “Now you’re being gross in class too?”

Jade looks back at him over Lore’s shoulder with a glare. “I liked you better when you were shy.” It’s only a joke but she looks serious. She turns back around and rests her head back on Lore’s shoulder, her eyes closing again. Lore smirks. For a moment it’s silent until Jade decides she isn’t done and mumbles, “Maybe you need a person to be a nerd with. Got any crushes, Thibault?”

He blushes bright red and perks up, “W-well um… there’s O’Malley. He’s a year ahead of us in Gryffindor. He has amazing hair and an amazing smile… He’s in the dueling club? Okay, so, there’s him… Oh, have you met Weiss? She’s in Slytherin, two years older… Well, she picked up my book when I was carrying a bunch and she’s got these green eyes that-“

“Oh my god, forget I asked.”

Jade laughs lightly, snorting at the thought that pops into her head. “And you say I’m the disaster.”

Thibault pouts. “When I like a girl, I smile and say hi. You insult her and fight her.”

Jade freezes. He’s right. That’s exactly what she did. “I…” She pauses to think of a comeback, but none come to her. “… Yeah, I regret that…” She looks up at Lore and frowns. Apologizing again now would feel weird so she opts for giving her a soft kiss on the cheek. Lore smiles slightly at her, but Jade’s eyes are drawn to the big black mark left from her lipstick.

Jade’s ears tinge with red. She forgot she was wearing lipstick. She reaches up to wipe it off, brushing it away carefully with her thumb.

“Gross…”

“Thibault, shut it!”

Lore snorts, letting her eyes close with a smile on her face. Jade settles back against her. She lets out a silent sigh and feels most of the tension in her body melt away.

 By the end of class, both girls are passed out together. Thibault stands by their desk wondering if he should even attempt to wake both of them.

Unfortunately, they all have their next class to get to. He lightly pinches Lore’s cheek. “Lore, come on we have class.” She slaps his hand away before even opening her eyes. “Can you get Jade?”

 Waking Jade up is never a fun task. Normally when someone wakes Jade up, she grumbles angrily, and she’s pissed at everyone for the rest of the day. There was even one time when Thibault had woken her up, she had looked up at him with such fear and tears in her eyes it made Thibault feel weird.

When Lore wakes her up though, she merely rubs the sleep from her eyes and takes Lore’s hand, tiredly following them out of the classroom.

Jade seems much happier the rest of the day, compared to how she usually is.

[shinyrockalaska]

The charms club competition

Fictober day 20- "charms"

I'm not really satisfied with it so I might rewrite it someday, but that's what I got for now..

@hphm-fictober

Big thanks to @geronimo-scamander-spd for always having the best ideas!

Summary: a charms club competition for Valentine's day turning out slightly different than what Ben expected..

A Barnaby x Ben fic

Word count: 1.4k

~~~

"don't forget Valentine's day is a week from now, which means you still have six days to create a nice charm for a loved one, wether it's a friend, family member or a significant other, and show it to me." Flitwick announced and by that the charms club meeting ended. Ben sight quietly as he gathered his stuff and left the classroom. He didn't really wanted to participate in this competition but since he already invented a charm, it's only make sense to share it for the competition. Flitwick loved the idea of the charm, a charm that makes the birds sing for the one you cast it on, and Ben was happy to have Flitwick support. But in order to participate he still needed to try the charm. He wanted to cast it on someone who isn't himself, to see the reaction of another person, a friend. But he didn't wanted to tell his friends yet, knowing they would pressure him to aim for winning, and he simply didn't want that. For him, making charms was something you do for fun, and the pressure of the competition would've ruined it for him.

When he looked at his friends, trying hard to decide on who to cast the charm, it was a hard decision to make so he spent a couple of nights imagining how they would react. MC, Bill and Rowan would think it's some sort of a curse and would immediately go and so a research about it. Tonks and tulip would think it's a prank. Penny, Charlie and Andre probably won't even notice. The imagined reaction he liked the most was Barnaby's reaction. He would be oblivious at first but will notice after a while and would really appreciate it. That's why he decided to cast it on him. Because of that, and not because it felt right in his heart. Or at least that's what he told himself...

Being his scared self, he casted the charm on Barnaby only a day before the deadline. He was outside of care of magical creatures class and luckily, it worked immediately. Ben watched behind a tree how a little bird flied around Barnaby and started tweeting a song, just for him. Just as Ben suspected, Barnaby enjoyed it but didn't noticed how unusual it is for a bird to do that. But nonetheless, Ben enjoyed watching it.

The day later he stood in the courtyard and casted it on himself so Flitwick could see and judge. He simply loved it and after he walked away, smiling, Ben used the counter spell, feeling nervous a little more than usual. Tomorrow would be Valentine's day and at lunch Flitwick would announce the winner and would call him to cast the charm. Ben didn't really wanted to win and if only cause he was terrified of the thought of himself standing in front of the entire school and casting his own charm. He barley slept that night, but the morning arrived anyway.

In the morning he felt so sick that he didn't even eat anything. "What's the matter, Ben? Why aren't you eating?" Charlie asked him, and Ben shrugged. "Are you sad because you don't have a date?" Bill teased and Ben just rolled his eyes and answered, "neither do you.."

he liked his friends a lot, but they never seem to recognize or understand his anxiety issues.

He couldn't focus in classes and when lunch time came he considered skipping a meal again but Rowan saw him and made him go inside and eat.

When Flitwick came to announce the winner, Ben found himself wishing he won't be the winner, but he was. He got up on stage and casted the charm on himself again, receiving cheering and applauses from the students as two birds flew inside the great hall and sang to Ben.

After that, a lot of students asked him to teach them the spell. There were so many that Flitwick had to promise to all of them that he'll set up a meeting in the next days where Ben would teach all of them the spell. Even though ben wished it could be his own little secret spell, he was very proud of himself, to be the winner out of all the other talented students who participated in the competition. After his friends congratulated him and they finally made it out of the great hall Ben remembered he still didn't use the counter spell on Barnaby, meaning birds still sing for him, meaning the entire school would know Ben casted it on Barnaby meaning they would all know he li-

"Watch out, Ben!" Penny's voice stopped him from his train of thoughts and he suddenly saw how close he was to bump into the wall. "Oh, thanks Penny" he said, embarrassed.

"What's the matter? Why are you so distracted?" Rowan asked. They were all walking to transfiguration class, along with Charlie and Barnaby. "It's nothing," he said, "I'm just really tired."

In transfiguration class they, of course, learned the bird conjuring charm. Luckily most of the students didn't succeed this charm so only a few birds sang to Barnaby, and Ben hoped none of the students would notice. Unfortunately, he could hear Tonks from behind him asking Barnaby, "aren't those birds singing to you? Just like Ben's charm?" He covered his eyes, embarrassed and sneaked a look at them just to see Barnaby answering, confused, "are they really singing to me? Isn't that what birds usually do?"

"Not in this way.. it's way too similar to the way Ben's charm worked back in the great hall"

"I think it's been like this for a few days now.. The singing birds.. are you sure it's the charm?"

"Awww he probably really likes you!"

Ben felt his entire face warm up as he blushed. As soon as the lesson was over Ben ran out of the classroom, his heart pounding fast, not ready to deal with anything right now. He went straight to the artefacts room, his usual hiding place, and tried to calm down.

His secret was out now, for everyone including himself. That's why he wanted to cast it on Barnaby. To make him happy and see him smile. No one in the world deserved to enjoy the sweet songs of the birds like Barnaby. Ben wished he could hang out with Barnaby forever, even though he didn't know him that well he could just feel there was something different about Barnaby and he wanted to know him better. To be the closest to him as possible.

Something in his mind told him it's wrong. Ben never saw two boys together, and he knew what muggles think about it. He didn't wanted to give his classmates another reason to hate him. They already disliked him for being an awkward coward, he doesn't need them to hate him for being gay too. "But it's not like Barnaby would even like me back, right?", he thought, "It was all just a big mistake, I shouldn't have done that. He doesn't deserve a pathetit, loser, weird, mudbloo-"

"I thought I'd find you here" Ben raised his head and found himself looking at Barnaby's deep green beautiful eyes. "It's almost time for dinner."

Ben nodded, feeling nervous again. Why, out all of his friends, it had to be Barnaby who finds him?

"Did you... did you cast your spell on me?" He asked the question Ben hoped he'd forget about.

He thought about lying but couldn't so he slowly nodded.

"I really enjoyed your charm. You are very talented. I don't know why you chose to cast it on me but it was nice."

"Well, Flitwick told us to create a charm for a loved one and-" the words left Ben's mouth before he realized it. He tried to think of a way to make it sound more casual but didn't succeed so he just glanced at the floor instead, with a very red face.

"We should get going, I don't want to miss dinner." Barnaby said, braking the silence, "I like food."

Ben felt disappointed a little but mostly worried and stressed as they made their way to the great hall.

Then Barnaby talked again. "but maybe we should hang out more."

Ben face light up immediately, making Barnaby smile as well. This smile made Ben feel at ease.

"I would like that a lot" he said, "do you think we could ever do this as-" he swallowed and took a deep breath before adding, "a date?"

He felt his stomach filled up with butterflies and as he closed his eyes he could feel Barnaby's hand reaching for his own, holding his hand tight as he answered, with a smile,

"yes."