#how will swap Papyrus react to that now uh

[seirindono]

The Missing Scarf (Interlude) - part 19

You look like you know a lot of Monsters so maybe you've heard of him too...

The doctor.

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[tyranttortoise]

How would boys react to watching a movie with their crush and there being an unexpected sex scene? Like these scenes where there's a lot of loud makeout sessions and moans and technically it's not porn but it's so loud and in your face. How would Fell, Swap and Swapfell bros react to seeing that when their crush is sitting next to them? (Bonus points for embarassed, red in the face crush)

(*I ended up doing Fell and Swap bros because I feel like I need to start kicking these down to four skeletons at a time.  Hope that’s okay!)

_______

You and your skeleton companion are watching You on Netflix, settled onto the couch as a nice way to unwind after dinner.  You’re feeling good about the fact that you talked him into watching it; the beginning of the first episode had quite a few literary references that were a little too human for him and went right over his head.  You half-expected this to be a show that you’d just chalk up to being a cultural barrier he couldn’t overcome enough to enjoy, but then the plot quickly ramped up.  

You were both intrigued, wrapped up in the story.  And then came a scene with a double-whammy.  Not only was the protagonist caught in a voyeur situation, but the sex scene involved unexpected nudity (the kind that would be flagged for sure on tumblr, a cynical part of you thinks), exaggerated, open-mouthed moans, and strategic camera angles.

Immediately, you freeze, feeling your face begin to flush hot.  If you were by yourself, this wouldn’t make you feel quite as mortified, but he’s right there.

_______

Red

He doesn’t think much about the sex scene when it pops up initially, except that he feels for that poor bastard that’s stuck watching the scene unfold from the shadows.  That’s gotta suck.  He wasn’t expecting the nudity so quickly in the series, and he chuckles.  “well, sweetheart, ya certainly know how ta pick a show.”  

Red glances over at you with a sharp-toothed smirk, and then finally realizes just how red your face is; his teasing only served to deepen your blush.  

“Hey, I didn’t know!” you respond defensively, shoving his shoulder, while he laughs harder.  You focus on looking at him instead of watching the scene, and try to compose yourself.  Your heart’s beating quick, so you must be more flustered than you thought.

“sure ya didn’t.  i mean, if ya wanted to watch some porn wit’ me, all you had t’do was ask.”  Red leans in, his arm resting behind the couch cushions by your head.  His grin is teasing, but there’s a certain heat in his gaze that’s different than before.  It feels almost like a challenge, but more of an... invitation?

Or are you just reading into this wrong because your mind’s in the gutter?

“You wish,” you scoff, pushing him back with a hand against his chest.  “Just watch the show, you perv.”

“takes one to know one,” he absently retorts, obediently returning his gaze to the TV just in time for the scene to shift from gratuitous sex to plot.  

His arm doesn’t move from behind your head... and sometime during the show, it drops to your shoulders.  

You lean into him.

Edge

Edge freezes up much like you do, unsure how to react.  His face is glowing red, flushed with magic, and he realizes that with every passing moment, it looks as if he’s watching with rapt interest.  

Horrified that you would think that of him, Edge deflects the only way he knows how:  with anger.  

“WHAT IN THE NAME OF ASGORE’S BEARD DID YOU INSIST ON WATCHING?!”

“Hey, I didn’t know!” you shoot back, absolutely mortified.  You knew he was going to react like this!  You knew he was going to be horrified -- he always hates Red’s perversions -- and think you to be some sort of pervert.

(I mean, if he only knew, but you’re letting your gutter mind slip out gradually.)

“It’s just one scene, Edge.  It’ll be over in a sec.”  The words come out in a rush; your face is burning, and his face is redder than you’ve ever seen it.  Edge can’t look at you; he’s too embarrassed.  

The scene is still going, so he yells to cover up the sounds from the TV.  “I HIGHLY DOUBT IT WILL BE JUST ONE SCENE!”

“If you don’t wanna watch it, we can find something el--”

“NO.”

He surprises himself by cutting you off.  Edge doesn’t want to admit that he’s intrigued -- or that the one scene has sent his mind straight into the gutter, too, and now he’s wondering what you’d look like with so much skin on display, and what kind of sounds you’d make.  

Stars, he can’t look at you.

“YOU WANTED TO WATCH THIS.  AND NOW YOU HAVE ME INTERESTED IN THE PLOT.  THE TERRIBLE PAPYRUS DOES NOT QUIT THINGS HALFWAY.”

He stares ahead of the TV, his arms crossed and his chin raised defiantly, while you relax beside him.  You want to point out his reddened skull, but you decide to have mercy on him and fall back into a comfortable silence.  Edge isn’t one that likes talking during a show, so you reach out and pat his upper arm.

His reddened skull doesn’t disappear anytime soon.

Blueberry

Blueberry feels his face light up a faint blue as soon as the scene begins.  He isn’t sure how to react.  If he was watching it by himself, he would be unphased at this point, although he did ask Papy one time why humans were obsessed with mating on camera.  Oddly enough, Stretch had nearly spat out his coffee and asked if Blue had been using his laptop recently.

The more Blue researched humans on his own computer, the more desensitized he realized he was to it.  

So why is he absolutely mortified?

“W-WELL, THAT WAS UNEXPECTED, MWEH HEH!” he blurts nervously, his voice sounding higher than usual, filled with nerves.

His eyelights shift to you.  He’s so embarrassed because you’re sitting next to him, furiously blushing, and it’s making his SOUL pulse through his bones.  You’re a human -- these are humans.  Do you think that he’s envisioning you in this situation?  That he’s picturing you without your cloth--

Whoops, now he is.  His skull glows brighter, and he laughs again.  

Loudly.  Nervously.  

You, on the other hand, are stammering an apology.  “Geez, Blue, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to expose you to that out of the blue -- shit, uh, without that unintentional pun.”

This gives him pause.  “EXPOSE ME TO WHAT?  TO A HUMAN SEX SCENE??”

Oh god.  You meekly nod.  “Well, yeah.”

Blue relaxes, grinning broadly.  “OH!  IS THAT WHY YOU’RE SO RED?  YOU WERE WORRIED?  WELL, FEAR NOT, MY HUMAN BESTIE!  THE MAGNIFICENT BLUE HAS DONE PLENTY OF RESEARCH ON HUMANS!!  AND THAT MEANS I AM WELL-VERSED ON WHAT HUMAN MATING ENTAILS!”  

... Did Blue just admit to you that he’s watched a lot of porn?

You can’t help it; you start laughing, and you can’t stop.  

Meanwhile, Blue tries to backpedal, while he simultaneously wishes he could hurl himself out the back window.  

Stretch

The lanky skeleton doesn’t even blush when you glance over at him.  Instead, he rolls his sucker around in his mouth, his relaxed grin still perfectly in place.  

Is it that he’s completely comfortable with you, or is he the type that just isn’t bothered by nudity?  Is it a skeleton thing -- or at the very least, a monster thing?  After all, physically, monsters and humans are incredibly different (there were plenty of humans wondering what monster sex looked like, but you’re not sure if the monsters shared the same perverted curiosity), so perhaps the intimacy didn’t translate.  

“there’s somethin’ i don’t get about this, hun.”

“Huh?” you snap out of your introspect.  Were you staring at him?

“why not just have curtains?  i’d always feel like i was bein’ watched.  and that’s exactly what’s happening here.”

“That’s your takeaway from this?” you can’t help but press, your embarrassment fading.

“sure.  what should i be taking away from this?  that i might need to watch you around my pillows?  is that a human thing?”  He gestures toward the screen, where one of the humans is... uh, enjoying the softness of a pillow even more than they just enjoyed their lover.

You swat him with a pillow from the couch, and he moans in-sync with the character on TV.  

A moment later, both of you are laughing.  

You’ll have to remember this the next time he wants to lie on you and asks you to be his pillow.  

If you’re lucky, you might be able to make him blush.

[undertale-rho]

Multiverse Saga: Taken!Altertale - Chapter 7

Rhosaith materialized within AlT-113 next to a bed of golden flowers; a pillar of light extended from a hole above down to the bed.

"You came." a voice sounded from nearby.

Turning to face the source, Rho saw 4 standing nearby, next to an alcove.

"Of course I did. I came to help with the reclamation of AlT-113." she said.

"And what about the others?"

Rhosaith shrugged.

4 looked to the alcove. "Works for me. Just be sure to stay out of my way."

4 moved to enter the alcove when a tear of light appeared near the bed of golden flowers; out from which emerged the Star Sanses and the Bad Time Trio. They were chatting among themselves but quieted down when they saw Rhosaith and 4 standing within the space already.

"Mweh heh heh!!!" Blueberry exclaimed. "We meet again, Rhosaith!" he then turned to 4. "And you, brooding Sans. Nice to meet you!!"

4 turned back around and entered through the alcove.

"Well that was rude." Blueberry pouted. "Didn't even say hi back."

"Don't let it get you down, Blue." the yellow-cloaked Sans said.

Blueberry looked back at the yellow-cloaked Sans.

"Yeah, I know, Dream." he said. "Not everybody is positive. Some people are negative. We should do our best not to be negative."

Dream!Sans smiled. "Anyway, we shouldn't leave him alone out here, with that Destroyer loose."

The Star Sanses, followed by the Bad Time Trio, walked through the alcove and down the tunnel beyond.

"You coming?" Chara called back to Rhosaith.

Rho looked up at him, nodded, and ran his way.

"So what's your story?" Chara asked Rhosaith when she caught up.

"My story?" Rhosaith asked.

"Yeah. I don't think I have ever seen you around before. What universe are you from?"

"My... universe?" Rhosaith thought about that for a second. She didn't know their designation system, and she didn't know what designation her universe held.

"According to Alliance archives," Hamlet spoke into Rhosaith's ear, "your universal designation is UnTR-13PO."

"I think it's... UnTR-13PO. Yeah."

Everybody stopped moving and turned to face Rhosaith, their faces dark with apprehension.

"What did you just say?" Sans asked, the white lights inside his eye sockets now point-like.

"What?" Rhosaith asked, unsure what to make of the situation.

"Did you just say you're from a restricted universe?" he asked, this time a bit more specific.

Rhosaith remained silent, unsure how to answer.

"Yeah, she did." Ink!Sans said. "Universe 13, no less."

"Whoa, you're from universe 13?" Blueberry then asked. "That's so cool! What's it like there? How'd you escape without alerting the Alliance?"

"Not the time for questions, Blue." Dream!Sans said, stepping out in front of him defensively.

"What's wrong with universe 13?" Rhosaith asked.

"It's a restricted universe." Ink answered. "Meaning that something, or somethings, within hold a realistic threat to the Alliance."

Rhosaith was struck dumb for a few seconds. A realistic threat?

"What the hell is in universe 13 that could possibly hold a 'realistic threat' to a K4 civilization?" Rhosaith demanded.

"Nobody knows." Papyrus said, pulling a box of cigarettes out of his hoodie pocket. "Mind if I smoke?" he then asked.

Rhosaith waved her hand. In response, Papyrus opened the box and pulled one out with his teeth, replacing the box to his pocket as he used fire magic to light the end. After a second, he pulled the cigarette out and held the end of it next to his neck.

"Universe 13 was among the first universes discovered by the Alliance." Papyrus continued. "The only thing that's known about it is that the eggheads back on the Nexus believe it to be the oldest universe in the multiverse. Other than that, only the King knows what lurks within. Well, the King, and you."

Rhosaith shook her head.

"I have no idea what the Alliance could possibly be afraid of." Rhosaith went silent for a few seconds. "Well, except maybe LOV."

"What's LOV?" Papyrus asked.

"It's a parasite that feeds off the SOUL of living creatures. Lives to murder."

"Oh, that." Papyrus said, unconcerned. "No, SOUL-crust—as the Alliance calls it—is prevalent throughout the multiverse."

"Then I don't know why the Alliance restricted my universe; what could possibly have spooked them that badly.

"Anyway," Rhosaith concluded, "we should keep moving. 4 is probably already far ahead."

Slowly, they all agreed and pressed forward, but all of them keeping a hidden eye on Rhosaith.

"Thanks a lot, Hamlet." Rhosaith said.

"It is of no fault of mine, Madam Rho." Hamlet replied.

"You knew they'd react that way. Why didn't you warn me?"

"There's nothing to worry about, Madam. Everything will work out fine."

Sighing, Rho continued along with the rest.

Entering the greater part of the Royal Watchtower, the mercenaries quickly ran across streaks of blood traced along in some areas. Upon entering a long hallway, a sudden shiver of the ground caused them all to stop progress.

"Whoa, did you feel that?" Chara asked the others.

"I felt something just now." Sans responded, turning a covert eye to Rhosaith.

An earthquake, just as sudden as the rumble the mercenaries felt, then appeared; seeming to shake the very foundations of the world itself. After a few seconds, everything stopped just as suddenly as it began.

"Did we get it?" a brooklyn-accented voice called out from nearby.

"I think so." a more feminine brooklyn-accented voice replied. "Lemme check."

"What's going on?" Blueberry asked. "Where are those voices?"

Rhosaith pointed to a massive fissure in one of the purple brick walls. "I think it's coming from there." she said.

"What the— was that always there?" Papyrus asked.

A red hook appeared from the fissure, grasping the outer rim of it. A few seconds later, one of the skeletons who was at the briefing appeared from the hole. Catching sight of the mercenaries standing nearby, she turned back towards the darkness of the fissure.

"Yeah, we got it." she called in, unhooking the red hook from the rim and dangling it down for her partner.

A few seconds later, S.T—the naked skeleton who attended the briefing—climbed from the fissure as well.

"Ay, well ain't this a surprise." S.T said upon climbing free of the hole.

The other skeleton then hopped down as well, the red item she held vanishing completely as she did so.

"Did you cause that quake?" Rhosaith asked.

S.T looked back at the fissure. "Eh, probably. There wasn't a Tunnel entrance to this universe."

"Tunnel entrance?"

S.T pointed back at the fissure. "Yeah, way to get to other universes."

"Why not just use an Anti-Void?" Ink!Sans asked.

S.T gave Ink an annoyed look.

"Does it look like I can access the Expanse?" he asked.

"I mean, you can't really tell just by looking."

"The answer's no, I can't. Nobody in my Crew can. So lay off."

Ink put his hands up defensively. "Relax, I was just asking."

"So who's this with you?" Rhosaith asked, trying to distract the two from conflicting further.

S.T looked bemused at Rhosaith, then answered, "Oh, this is Swap."

"Hello." Swap said, waving to the rest.

The mercenaries greeted Swap.

"We should hurry forward." Rhosaith said. "4 is up ahead, and he didn't seem too interested in wanting help."

"What!?" Dream exclaimed. "4 is planning to fight that Destroyer alone?"

"That's what it looked like to me."

Immediately, all the mercenaries in the hall began running through the rest of the tower. In what seemed like no time at all, they finally found 4 heading down the hall below the home at the end of the tower.

"4!" Dream called out when they saw him.

4 turned to face who had said his name, finding everyone else who had been at the briefing.

"So you finally arrive. Took you long enough." 4 said, continuing on his path unconcerned.

"4, wait!" Dream called again. "We need to think out our plan of attack. We don't even know who we're dealing with, so we need to be extra careful."

"You be careful." 4 said. "'the Destroyer' is in Snowdin Town, and he probably already knows we're here."

"What!?!" Ink said. "How do you know this, do you... have you encountered this Destroyer before?"

4 stopped walking.

"Yes." he said after a minute. "And I'm here to kill him, once and for all." he began walking again.

Unsure what else to do, the rest followed after.

"So, 4," Rhosaith said a few minutes after they'd walked through the Citadel door to the Snowdin Province, "seeing as you've encountered this... Destroyer, before, what can you tell us?"

4 looked over at Rho.

"You're a new rifter, aren't you." he said.

"I, uh, don't really understand what 'rifter' means."

"A rifter is somebody who travels between universes using the Anti-Void Expanse as a go-between. It is by far the most common means of travel in the multiverse. You saying you don't know the term confirms it."

"So basically, I'm new."

4 nodded.

"So, are you gonna—"

"Mercenaries don't commonly share information about Destroyers." 4 said bluntly. "Clears competition in that way. If others don't know what they're up against, they could get themselves killed, or they could run. Either way, you get a bigger cut."

"That's insane!" Rhosaith protested.

"Information is power. If you think it's so insane, the Star Sanses is the group best suited for you. They share information like it's nobody's business. For example, everything they've ever discovered about another Destroyer—Error!Sans—has been shared in every detail with the Alliance." 4 spat dismissively at that last statement.

"So information about the enemy should never be shared, simply to sabotage the abilities of the others with you?"

"Sounds like you got it, rook."

As they finished their conversation, the mercenaries were approaching the outer-most sections of the town.

Reaching the inn not too far in, a raspy voice echoed across the empty buildings.

"THAT'S CLOSE ENOUGH!" it shouted.

Everybody stopped where they stood.

"I see you brought friends along this time, Error!404." the voice then said.

"And I can see you're still hiding like a coward, Infected." 4 responded.

A hysterical laughter then echoed across the village as a single Sans dragging a somewhat smaller goat-Monster appeared out from behind the furthest house in the village.

"Here I am!" Infected declared.

A blue aura appeared around 404, a great feeling of power seeming to build around him.

"Ah ah ah," Infected warned, "look what I got!"

Infected dragged the goat-Monster—which Rhosaith confirmed to be a naked Toriel—up in front of him and presented her like a meat shield.

"You wouldn't want to hurt sweet little miss Toriel here, now would you?" Infected asked, drawing his axe and pressing it against Toriel's throat.

Toriel didn't seem responsive.

"You know I only care about tearing you to pieces!" 404 said.

"Yes, but what about your new friends?" Infected asked.

404's eyes widened, and he glanced behind him at the other mercenaries. S.T's Crew was an unknown variable, but 404 knew that the Star Sanses and the Bad Time Trio wouldn't stand for innocents being hurt.

"You wouldn't want them to tear you apart before you can do it to me, now would you."

404's aura dimmed.

"That's it. Now back away slowly."

404 backed up a few paces.

Suddenly, Rhosaith drew both a blade from the skirt on her long-coat along with the handle, clicking the blade into place at the end, then pointed it at Infected and fired, launching the blade at high speeds, straight into Infected's right eye.

"Sans!" Rhosaith then shouted. "Use gravity magic and pull Toriel to us."

Immediately, Sans raised his arm and pulled the Toriel from Infected's distracted grasps, pulling her to them in no time.

"Is she alright?" Rhosaith asked as soon as Toriel slid to the ground in front of Sans.

Sans held a hand over her chest, a faint green glow emanating from his palm.

"She's alive." he said after a few seconds.

A hysterical laughter once again broke through the air. Looking back at Infected, he had grasped the blade that was sticking from his socket and was slowly pulling it free, laughing as he did so.

"That was a nice shot!" he said, pulling the blade free. "Weren't you worried you might hit dear sweet Toriel?"

"Not at all." Rhosaith said bluntly.

Infected's smile wavered slightly.

"Not at all?" he parroted. "What are you, some kind of psychopath?"

"Maybe. Or maybe I was so certain in my aim that I wasn't concerned for Toriel."

Infected's smile grew again. "Oh I can't wait to tear into you." he said, licking his teeth.

"Blue, Dream, Rhosaith," Ink said, stepping forward with his massive paintbrush. "you three protect Toriel and see if you can revive her. The rest of you, with me. We're gonna take this... thing down!"

Rhosaith glanced over at Ink, annoyed that she'd been told to stay back, but when she saw that the other mercenaries were doing as they'd been told by him, she relented and fell back to where Toriel lay.

"How is she?" Rhosaith asked again when she reached her body, which was already being tended to by Blue and Dream.

"She'll be fine... I hope..." Dream said, carefully administering life magic to her SOUL as Blue tended to her physical injuries.

"What can I do to help?"

"Honestly? Just... stay back."

"What?"

Dream looked up from Toriel and looked Rhosaith directly in the visor.

"Stay here and out of the way." he said.

"Why!?" Rhosaith demanded to know as Dream went back to healing.

"Because... the others, they don't... trust you. Please understand, you're new, so you already have that working against you. Now normally, that wouldn't be so bad, but you're also from a restricted universe. Seeing as the King isn't hunting you down, that must mean you bypassed the Alliance's sensors."

"So you all see me as a threat."

Dream slowed a bit. "Yes... nobody knows how to bypass the sensors—not even the King—so you being able to do it... well, it's frightening. What if something else from your universe finds a way to leave without alerting the sensors? It could mean the end of the Alliance and multiverse peace as we know it."

Rhosaith looked over at the mercenaries, who were fighting tooth-and-nail against Infected.

They call this peace?

"There's that," Dream continued, "and the fact that you just... fired at Infected without a moment's hesitation. What if you hit Toriel?"

"I wasn't going to." Rhosaith said.

"How do you know that?"

"Because I peered through time and saw that, if I did things correctly, there would be no possible way I would hit her."

"You... peered through time?" Dream asked, freezing up. "Are you trying to get a Keeper to delete you?"

Rhosaith looked back at the battle. "I... don't think I'll have to worry about that..."

"Everybody who screws with time thinks that! The Keepers don't like it when people screw with time, no matter who it is!"

Rhosaith looked back at Dream to respond but was interrupted by Hamlet.

"Rhosaith is a Time Specter of a 'Keeper' League. She is permitted—within reason—to 'screw with time', as you say."

Dream and Blue both looked dumb-struck.

"You... work with the Keepers?" Blue asked.

Rhosaith silently looked away, back towards the battle. Blue and Dream didn't press.

The battle, all things considered, was going relatively well. Ink had cut off any avenues of escape, while S.T and Swap herded Infected around Snowdin. The Bad Time Trio, along with Error!404, were the major hard-hitters, with Sans and Papyrus keeping Infected from doing anything that would put him at an advantage, and Chara and Error!404 making sure to keep him immobile and pound him with horrid attacks; Chara with his vines, and 404 with his cables.

About five minutes after the battle began, S.T, who had been holding a supporting role for the majority of the battle, finally managed to sever the skull from the rest of Infected's body as he had been immobilized by an endless growth of vines. The last sound heard from the beast was laughter as his body disintegrated into pale blue specks that flew up into the sky.

Taken!Altertale : Hysteria

Previous Underearth Prologue First of this book Next

[happyhearthooligan]

Master List Jan Edition 2020

franstastic-ideas - January Content

------------------------------------------------------

Cleaved

Jan 6 - May I have some more Cleaved!AU headcanons???

Jan 27 - Can I have more yandere cleaved au? Please.

Jan 29 - The skeletons’ perspective when Frisk leaves for the first time

Pure Underfell

Jan 1 - Does Red ever tease Edge about how "poor" his "flirt game" is?

Jan 3

Are Mettaton and Alphys fans of humans as well?

Papyrus and Chara’s relationship is honestly extremely sweet

Jan 6 - You said that UF Sans is a romantic at heart…

Jan 13 - As Frisk doesn't live with the Royal Family, she's not their child…

Jan 19 - I feel obligated to say that, out of ALL the Sanses…

Jan 29 - One of UF Chara's hobbies is writing poems…

Pure Underswap

Jan 6  - y A n d e r e ?

Jan 21 - Since you now need "aggressively affectionate Swap Sans”…

Jan 25 - Yandere berry hides under Frisk's bed. Pass it on

Classic Undertale

Jan 3 - What "body types" do Frisk and Chara have?

Jan 5 - Does Chara still think Papyrus is a dork after marriage?

Jan 13 - How do the characters react to hearing their theme?

Jan 20 - Pre-pacifist, does Papyrus tell Sans puns to help Sans out of his brooding?

Jan 21 - Does Papyrus get jealous because Chara and Asriel relation?

Multiple AU Headcanons

Jan 3 - What's Papyrus and Undyne’s relationship in the other Aus?

Jan 5 - How do Chara’s AU counterparts feel about flowers?

Jan 26 - The Sanses give their girls a puppy as a gift…

Other Headcanons

Jan 3 - Dancetale G x Frisk headcanon?

Jan 5

A Pokemon AU, Frans/Papara content.

What is Valentine's Day like in the Convergence AU?

Jan 6 - Some Mystery Dungeon AU headcanons

Jan 13 - More Greaser G AU Frans? HC?

Jan 16

Any lamia head cannon? UwU

Can we have some kiddie young love Frans ^^

Jan 20 - I have the most horrible, most cruel, most heinous concept for a Fransfic…

Jan 23 - Swapfell Frans headcanons

Jan 28 - Fun Fact for the UF Prompt "You’ve Gotta Be Kitten Me”:

Other types of posts

Jan 3

My Switch Lite arrived in the mail today, and I am loving it!

I’ve obtained an insane amount of shinies recently…

How come you've never read Sooner or Later You're Gonna Be Mine?

Jan 13 - I don't know if you have seen the cartoon called Big City Green…

Jan 14 - The Switch Lite? Definitely a good investment on my part

Jan 16

I’ve been thinking about…

Okay, so Pokémon: Twilight Wings is a thing now.

Jan 17 - So, uh, would anybody like to hear about that time…

Jan 18 - I thought I was gonna add a Frosmoth as the final member…

Jan 19 - Me: You mean 2008 wasn’t, like, three years ago?

Jan 21 - Leon took his loss so well and in great stride, with dignity.

Jan 23 - By all means, let us hear about this dark, comedy, otome game…

Jan 24 - Why are so many people portraying Gordie as…

Jan 25 - So, uh, Fransweek…

Jan 27 - Do you like Error x Core!Frisk? Or Ink x Core!Frisk?

Jan 28 - What the heck is going on in that jacked up game of yours? ------------------------------------------------------

[sleepyfan-blog]

Sleepy Dream [Part 2]

Fandom: Undertale AU

Part two of this. Part three here. 

Characters: Dream, Science!Sans, WD Gaster

warnings: cursing

word count: 1,883

Summary: Dream decides to go to Sci for help.

A month later, and Dream was definitely sure that it wasn’t because of the timelines they’d been fighting to protect. He’d managed to convince Stretch of that though, and the Swap Papyrus had stopped gently poking him. But Dream had no idea what was wrong… And the positive guardian could admit, at least to himself, that he needed someone else’s help in figuring out what was going on. But who had the expertise and the ability? Not to mention the access to whatever resources he might need to deal with whatever was wrong. While he could tell Ink about the issue… Dream grimaced a little. The artistic skeleton wasn’t his first choice for talking about such an issue with. Mostly because he was pretty sure that Ink would just laugh it off, pat him on the head and tell him to take a nap.

He was currently wandering around in a pretale, hiding from the monsters in the underground per Ink’s rules of only Sanses and Papyri getting involved in the multiversal shenanigans - as the more beings aware of them in a single AU, the more likely that Error was to notice where they were. Or at least, that’s what the other said was true… And Dream had no reason not to believe the other. His eye lights brighten as he realized that the Science Sans of this AU was already aware of the multiverse and a good friend and ally of Ink’s… And someone who Dream was relatively sure he could trust with this issue.

The positive guardian waited until Sci was on his lunch break - and from the looks of it, he’d grabbed enough Grillby’s for the entire team beneath the Royal Scientist (who was a Gaster currently, if Dream wasn’t mistaken), shadowing the other until he was walking through an empty spot in Waterfall before calling out “Hey Sci! Uhm… Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Sci turned around, his eye lights widening a little, before a bright smile appeared on his face “Oh, heya Dream! Got a new gadget that you want me to take apart and put back together? There shouldn’t be anyone else around during this time - everyone’s either at work or sleeping.”

“Ah… No. Actually I was… I was hoping if you could help me with a personal issue, actually.” Dream started, fidgeting with his hands a little “I’ve been having some issues keeping my energy levels up to where they normally are and I don’t know why. I’m not hurt and as far as I know, I didn’t pick up any negative stat effects or curses.”

Sci hummed a little, frowning a bit “How long’s this been going on? Can you tell me what your signs and symptoms are?”

The positive spirit sighed a little, explaining what he’d noticed… And finished semi reluctantly with “And this has been happening for about three months now. The passive MP and energy loss is… About 10 MP per hour. I’ve been snacking on monster candy and cinnabunnies to counteract that but… It’s starting to become less effective. Also while sleeping for eight hours does restore me back to full MP, that only lasts for about three hours - less if I get into a fight.”

“That’s… How much MP do you even have if a loss of 10 MP an hour isn’t a noticeable dip in power? Stars above, Dream. That could be really dangerous!” Sci sputtered, his eye lights shrinking to panicked pinpricks for a moment “Of course I’ll help you. I’ll… If you’re not physically hurt, it could indicate that you might have… I’ll need to check your Soul.”

Dream winced at that, fidgeting a little. Most people had really strange reactions to seeing it. Given the fact that it was colored, I'm not in the shape of a normal, for either a human or a monster. The fact was that Dream was neither, but he tended not to like to think of that fact as it was simply easier for him to be assumed to be just a normal skeleton monster. It was a lot easier and to allow others to make assumptions then to explain the truth and have to go into details about his past that he did not want to speak about to anyone ever. “I… ok. Will you be able to run the tests during the day, or should I come back when you're off-shift?”

“Dream, I know that you and Ink have this no-interference policy. And I can understand why it’s in place. But this could be a very serious issue. I’ll be the one taking the data and looking it over, but I’m going to have to report this to my boss - because I’m going to have to be using some of the Soul equipment which none of us are allowed to do except under certain circumstances. A… Condition like yours being one of them. I’ll only tell Doc G though. And he’s good. A little weird, but he’s good. Trust me on this, I’m an excellent judge of character. He’ll also be helping me look at the data as he’s got a lot more experience with these things than I do.” Sci explained, suddenly grabbing one of Dream’s wrists and teleporting the two of them directly in front of the labs. The younger skeleton fumbled with his keycard for a moment before swiping it and marching the both of them into the top floor of the labs.

The Dr. Alphys was on the floor, along with several other monsters whose names Dream did not know off of the top of his head. In the middle of all of them, quietly talking to the Alphys, was a Dr. Gaster. He was just as tall and intimidating as any other Gaster who Dream had tentatively peeked at from behind a tree (or Ink) and the positive guardian dug his heels in for a moment “Sc… Saaaans!” He fussed, tugging at the other before stumbling forwards, an unhappy groan coming from the back of his throat as he realized that he was wholly incapable of stopping the younger skeleton from dragging him around like a ragdoll. He called the other Sans,  rather than his nickname as this was going to be strange enough as it was.

“Uh… Sans… Who’ve you got there? I didn’t realize there were any other skeletons in the underground about from the doc,  you and your brother…” A snake-like monster spoke up, moving towards the two of them curiously.

“That’s because he’s not from the Underground. Or this universe. Everyone, this is Dream the source and protector of all positive feelings in the multiverse. He’s in dire need of help and may be dying a little bit. Here’s the grub, I’m going to be on sub level five - and he’s not gonna react well to being poked and prodded by anyone but me. Don’t ask me how or why I know him, just that I do.” Sci explained, throwing the bags of Grillby’s at the cat monster - who caught the food immediately. Everyone around them was staring in utter confusion as Sci stomped over to the elevator, still dragging a limp and face palming Dream behind him.

“Why did you tell them that?” Dream asked, voice muffled as they waited for the elevator to show up “And can’t we just teleport down there?”

“Because they would have asked a bunch of questions and trying to lie to them is damn near impossible. Especially since this is not something that is probably going to be fixed after a quick check-up. Besides, all of them have met Ink before. Alph found his dumb ass passed out in a puddle of paint half-dead before you showed up and dragged him inside to get healed. So they’re aware that the multiverse is more than just a concept, and that there are protectors trying to keep glitch head from destroying all of us.” Sci explained impatiently “And there are anti-teleportation wards on the lower levels of the labs to prevent potential theft. Or Ink wandering in and seeing how many things he can poke and mix together until something explodes.”

“Oh. Okay…” Dream responded, managing to finally get his feet under him. He shuffles a little bit closer to the younger skeleton, distinctly distressed by the way that the scientists are watching him and tries to shake off the desire to run and hide. He… People watching him with that sort of intensity usually doesn’t entirely end well. “Uhm… They’re kind of… Staring… A bit?”

“We look a lot alike, Dream. And I kind of shoved a lot of information their way. They’re good people, Dream. We’re safe here.” the younger skeleton murmured as the elevator dinged and the two of them stepped into it.

Dr. Gaster followed behind them before the elevator doors could close. “I believe you’ll need my help, Sans.” He murmured glancing curiously at the both of them. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, ah, Dream I believe it was? I am Doctor Wing Dings Gaster, although most Call me Doctor Gaster… Or Doc G, if they’re feeling particularly cheeky.”

The positive spirit couldn’t help the flinch - nor could he help the fact that he grabbed Sci and pulled the both of them into the furthest corner of the elevator, trying and failing to teleport them out of there, starting to shake a little. He was holding Sci close to him, the both of them scrunched into the corner of the elevator as Dream trembled as he stared up at him. He wanted to believe Sci when he said that this Gaster was good… But with the other’s tall, looming presence and the way the other’s darker magic pressed against his senses, Dream was feeling incredibly trapped at the moment.

“Dream… Dream did you have a bad encounter with a Fell G recently? Or… Hell, did you run into a Handplates Gaster recently? I promise you. He just wants to help. He’s not going to hurt anyone. It’s okay. We’re safe here. You can trust us. We won’t hurt you.” Sci attempted to soothe, his calm, caring emotions - along with the neutrally curious emotion coming from Gaster were helping somewhat.

“...Sorry. I just… I don’t… Like asking for help… From anyone and wasn’t expecting to be introduced to a room full of beings and my weakness shouted at them.” Dream managed out, voice quiet and trembling. He didn’t mean to cause the flash of guilt that ran through Sci, he really didn’t. “And I did tell you earlier that I can’t die of natural causes.”

“You could be cursed or something, and it’s hidden well enough that it doesn’t pop up on a surface check, Dream. I’ve seen the occasional curse like that. It’s slow-acting, but it’s insidious and has taken lives if not stopped.” Sci answered back bluntly, shaking his head a little as they reached their stop “And I like hugs… But please let me go this is our stop.”

“... Okay. I… I trust you, Sci. And you did mention that this Dr. Gaster is trustworthy… So I’ll take you at your word.” The positive spirit responds quietly, letting his friend go and following him out of the elevator and into one of the labs.

[skeletorific]

Play My Heart in Swing Time- A Ko-fi and Kisses Drabble. GN!Reader/MT!Papyrus+UT!Sans+US!Sans

a drabble for @iliterallyhavenolife , who has been wonderfully patient. Hope you like it, it was a lot of fun to write!

“You know, if you guys ever relaxed the dress code, I might actually swing by this place more often,” Sans said, adjusting his tie for the twelfth time while he did a sweeping glance of the smoky interior of Grillby’s bar. Lucky had no doubt that this alternate of his brother would quickly be stripping both it and the dark blue sports coat he had donned for the occasion, but frankly, he had larger concerns right now.

“I QUITE LIKE IT, ACTUALLY,” Blue said, who had favored a light grey with cyan pinstripes that matched his eyes. “STILL, ALL THESE CIGARETTES CAN’T BE GOOD FOR HUMANS-”

Lucky held up a hand for silence, leaning across the bar to try and catch Grillby’s eye. Normally he didn’t like being rude but he was a bit desperate to make sure he hadn’t missed it.

Finally, the blue fireman saw him and came over, wiping out a glass. “back again?” He crackled softly.

“ARE THEY-”

“They’re still on,” he said, with definite amusement, but Lucky only sighed in obvious relief, collapsing onto a stool.

“Alright, man, what’s up? You’re looking a bit rattled.” That joke was even weak by his brother’s standards, but he couldn’t manage more than a vaguely annoyed glare before riveting his attention to the stage. Sans took a seat on his left side, leaning on the counter and ordering a drink.

“YES, WHAT WAS SO IMPORTANT? INK SAID YOU SOUNDED...URGENT.” Blue said, sitting down on his right.

“.....THERE’S THIS PERFORMER.” Lucky said quietly (well, quietly for him). “THEY’RE...NOT FROM AROUND HERE. AT LEAST, I DON’T THINK SO. THEY’VE BEEN PLAYING HERE ONCE A WEEK, AND NO ONE AROUND HERE SEEMS TO KNOW MORE THAN A NAME. I WAS WONDERING IF EITHER OF YOU THOUGHT THEY LOOKED FAMILIAR.” Human tourists weren’t uncommon these days. Ink made his traveling service available to pretty much everyone who knew how to get in contact with him, and it wasn’t uncommon to see plenty of wide-eyed humans wandering in a world that wasn’t their own.

“ONE OF THE DETERMINED HUMANS, OR...” Blue said, referring broadly to the Frisks and Swap Charas.

“I...I DON’T THINK SO. THEY DIDN’T LOOK LIKE ONE, AT LEAST.”

“they causing trouble or something? why do you need information this bad-”

“....I-I WAS HOPING FOR AN INTRODUCTION.” Lucky blurted out, cheekbones glowing a bright vermillion.

Blue and Sans exchanged a look and then matching mischievous grins.

“I SEE...”

“so, the crack shot finally took a...bullet to the heart, huh?”

“MMM!” Lucky groaned, burying his face in his hands. “LOOK, YOU TWO...YOUR WORLDS SEEMED LIKE A GOOD FIT AND...FOR WHATEVER REASON I FEEL LIKE YOU’RE LESS LIKELY TO BALL THIS UP FOR ME.”

“OF COURSE WE’LL HELP!” Blue said, patting his shoulder encouragingly.

“And hey, even if we don’t recognize them, might work as wingmen-”

“UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES.”

“its starting” Grillby said, who had been watching this whole conversation. Lucky sat bolt upright, making the other two snicker. Still, neither Blue nor Sans could resist looking with interest at the stage as the last performer was ushered off with applause and Mettaton took over, looking around the crowded bar with a dazzling metallic grin.

“Well, hot dawg, aren’t they just marvelous?” Scattered applause. “Kisses, darling, thanks for coming out. And now, for a returning favorite, and an old friend, its Shyren, with a new member of her little band, Kai! Knock em dead, dolls!”

Shyren, Aaron, and Napstablook took the stage, Shyren looking like she wanted to pass out from nerves, as always. Napstablook sat down by the drum. Aaron flexed for the pleasure of the audience (several of whom screamed very loud), before picking up the sax.

Alongside was the cutest human any of them had ever seen. They were a bit chubby, with a sweet open face under bright blue hair that caught the stage lights well. They seemed fairly nervous too but gave a bright wave out into the audience. Sans could notice the blush growing brighter on Lucky’s cheekbones, and bit back a smile.

Kai picked up the guitar. The band all exchanged nods, and then Shyren signaled the piano player.

“A one two three four...”

The band meshed well together. None of them could tear the eyes of their human. They were focused on their performance, to be sure, but they seemed to be having fun with it. When Shyren would stumble on a note they’d make a goofy face, emboldening her a bit. The audience began to get into the performance and they seemed to latch onto that, encouraging it along.

“THEY’RE...” Blue seemed to be developing his own flush.

“AMAZING” Lucky said with a forlorn sigh.

Sans tried to make a joke, but in the end, all he could do was murmur “fuck”

After far too short a time, the four of them exited the stage, flushed and excited. Mettaton started introducing the next act but the three of them just exchanged a look.

“SO...ANYONE, YOU KNOW?”

Blue shook his head, straining his neck to try and keep an eye on them

“think I’d remember something like them” He mumbled.

“WELL...IT WAS WORTH A SHOT...” Lucky said weakly, unable to tear his eyes away.

“.....fuck it, we’re going over,” Sans said, getting to his feet. Before the other two could react he’d wrapped his hands around their wrists and teleported to the other end of the room, near where they are. Both of them were startled and started to protest, but realized they were within earshot and shifted into whispers.

“WE CAN’T JUST-”

“Look, I think we’re all gonna regret it if we just let it slip past. If they’re not from any of our worlds, then who knows when we’ll see them again.” He stuck out his hand towards both of them. “We’ll all make our shot and let them make up their mind. Deal?”

“.....” They both looked at the hand, clearly wavering.

“WELL...I ALWAYS AM UP FOR A ROMANTIC ENCOUNTER.” Blue said, putting his hand on top of his.

Sans looked at Lucky. “c’mon, you really wanna spend another few weeks attached to the counter of this place, wishing you’d acted sooner? A one in three chance is better than months with no shot at all.”

Lucky grimaced...but straightened his hat, placing his hand on top of the pile. “ALRIGHT”

“MAYBE WE’LL GET LUCKY AND THEY’LL LIKE ALL THREE OF US?”

“We’ll see, bud, we’ll see.” Sans broke it and turned towards them, tapping them on the shoulder.

They turned to face him and smiled. “Oh, hi!” Fuck, they were even cuter up close, their face had a whole galaxy of freckles going on.

“hi,” he said, recovering quickly and shoving his hands in his pockets, grinning. “Uh, me and my friends back there just wanted to letcha know we enjoyed the show.”

“Oh, thank you so much! Um, to you too” they said, turning their smile on the other two. Lucky stiffened a bit and Blue smiled back just as bright. “I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

“Name’s Sans. Sans the Skeleton” He held out his hand.

“Oh, Kai!” They shook his hand enthusiastically. “And, you two?”

“I’M BLUE,” He said, coming forward and shaking their hand too.

Kai grinned and gave him a light buddy punch, which made Blue giggle. “Nice to meet you, Blue.” They finally looked at Lucky. “Oh, hey, I’ve seen you here before haven’t I?”

“....YES....”

“Well, it's nice to finally meet you.” They held out their hand. “Kai”

Before the other two could blink Lucky had taken their hand and pressed a gentle kiss to their knuckles before releasing it just as quickly, doffing his hat and giving them that boyish smile that made him seem like such a non-threat to the cops. “LUCKY. NICE TO MEET YOU TOO. I’M A BIG FAN.”

Damn it, looks like the family charm came for both brothers. And he was such a stammering blusher before...

“We were just wondering if you and your friends wanted some drinks,” Sans said. Probably for the best if three strange men didn’t immediately try to get them somewhere alone.

“Well, my bandmates are actually gonna be heading home. I should be getting back myself, but...I’d love a drink before I leave!”

They all grinned. Perfect.

“RIGHT THIS WAY,” Lucky said, swooping in before the others and gently escorting them to the bar. Blue and Sans exchanged grins. Oh, no way were they letting him lead this whole thing.

“SO WHERE’D YOU LEARN TO PLAY GUITAR?” Blue said, moving onto the other side of them.

“These two are gonna fret you with questions, of chords”

Needless to say, they didn’t so much as think to call Ink for several hours, and they were treated to the sound of that laugh more than once, as well as a few puns of their own. They all left with their number, and the promise of more to come...

[skeletonbrothersreptilelovers]

Oh! The requests are open! Hmmm, how about US and UT skelebros Who has an SO, which can alter reality? Kind of walking on the walls! Thank you and have a nice Day!

I hope you have a niceday as well! ^^ I tried to give them all a different way to alter reality to keep it different, but if you don’t like one of the ways or want them all to be the same then tell me! I enjoyed writing it so I don’t mind to redo it ^^

Also, I realized after finishing half of Swap Pap that you didn’t really ask for their reaction, so I hope that it’s okay that I included it! I still included how they feel about it so it’s still what you asked, just a little extra. Still, if you don’t like it then I’ll change it ^^ 

Either way, I do hope you enjoy! 

Sans (UnderTale)

It was cleaning day. No biggie, it happens allthe time. Sans and his s/o usually go on a date during cleaning day, but theysaid his room was to filthy this time and they needed to clean it. No big deal,right? At least, until he walks in to check on them. And they’re upside down.On the ceiling. They seem to be cleaning some kind of stain. “Uh…” How ishe suppose to react to that? His s/o startles when they hear Sans, causing themto lose their concentration and drop down. Luckily, Sans catches them with hismagic before they hit the ground. “I would say ‘what’s up’ but weboth know that answer.” His s/o chuckles nervously in response. He isn’t sure how he’s supposed to feel about what hesaw, or even understands what he saweither. They rub the back of their neck awkwardly, obviously uncomfortable andanxious. They both sit down to have a talk about what Sans had seen, and theyexplain they have the ability to alter the way gravity pulls people or objects.Sans thinks it’s cool, even if it’sunexpected. It’s pretty similar to his power (expect his power is levitationand not controlling the way gravity is pulling). He’ll frequently ask them toalter his gravitational pull so he can sleep on the ceiling (Why? to annoyPaps, of course). He also asks them to change the gravity pull of randomobjects (Once again, so he can annoy paps). 

Papyrus (UnderTale)

Papyrus is washing dishes afterdinner as normal. His brother left for his hot dog stand afew minutes prior and his s/o was upstairs most likely painting.Nothing unusual was happening… Until he notices the water stopped. Not justturned off, the faucet was still on and the water was still coming out, but itwas frozen. Papyrus hesitantly sticks his hand into the water, only to jerkback when it goes through it. It leaves a frozen trail of water droplets wherehe pulled his hand back. He’s very confused and concerned, so he goes to walkupstairs to check on his s/o to see if it affected them. “DATEMATE?” hecalls out as soon as he opens the door and they shriek in fear. They turn toPapyrus with an incredulous expression. “I DID NOT MEAN TO SCARE YOU BUTSOMETHING IS WRONG! NOTHING IS MOVING! BESIDES YOU AND ME.” He rubs his handstogether nervously and a guilty expression crosses their face. They tell himit’s their fault, they didn’t realize that it didn’t affect him likeit was supposed to do. They explain that they have the ability toalter reality’s time so it pauses everything. They had knocked paint over andpaused before it hit the ground, and they aren’t sure why itdidn’t affect him this time. He doesn’t mind and thinks theirability is super amazing! He occasionally asks them to pause time so he canprank Sans. Japed again by the great Papyrus! 

Sans (UnderSwap)

Sans was asleep until he was woken by an oddfeeling. It almost felt like he wasn’t laying on the bed anymore, but not likesomeone picked him up either. He couldn’t feel any arms under him. It wasn’this brother’s magic either because he couldn’t feel that heavy feeling of bluemagic! He opens his eyes to see what was going on… only to be face to facewith his ceiling. “Wha…?” He’s very sleepy and confused. As he looksaround the room, he could feel the sleep in his system quickly leave.Everything in his room was floating! Even the water from his glass he left onthe nightstand! And his datemate! “DATEMATE!”Sans’s loud voice causes them to jerk awake and suddenly everything was fallingto the ground. Sans groans when he lands on top of the bookshelf while his s/olands safely on top of the mattress (which was off the bed). The commotioncauses Papyrus to pop into the room, but after staring at a very bewilderedSans and taking in the state of his room, he just turns and leaves. He didn’twant to know and he didn’t want to help clean it up either. Sans’s attentionturns to his s/o when they start profusely apologizing to him. They tell himthey have the ability to alter gravity and they were having a weird dream,which caused them to make this mess. Sans forgives them, they didn’t do onpurpose after all. He is super excited to learn about their powers though!Just, don’t do it in the room anymore if they can help it. It takes a couple ofdays to get everything sorted out. He’ll occasionally ask them to use it sothey can float around the house (as long as the furniture isn’t involved). Hisfavorite thing is when they change his gravity outside and he can float around(but he is no longer allowed to do that after a near heart attack fromPapyrus).

Papyrus (UnderSwap)

Papyrus had noticedstrange things happening before, but never knew it was his s/o. Like sometimeshis honey actually turns out to be water even though he could’ve sworn it washoney ten seconds ago. He always failed to notice his s/o quietly snickering inthe background. He finally finds out it was them when he tries to prank themone day. They had just woke up and was walking into the kitchen when Papyrustries to pour a bucket of ice-cold water on them while making a pun. “Heyhun, water ya up to.” Intheir sleepy state they didn’t think much about it when they altered the waterso it would turn into steam instead. Papyrus hasto blink a couple of times because whatthe fuck just happened? It wasn’t until after they’ve stared at Papyrus’sbewildered expression for a while that they realize what they did. Neither knows how to respond, so they both stare at eachin awkward silence for a long time. “Isthis a steam or did that justhappen?” His joke is forced and they hesitate a few seconds before nervouslyexplaining what just happened. They canalter certain elements (not sentimental beings, mostly things like water,stone, wood, trees, etc) and change them into a whole different element (sothey could change water into steam or rock or sand or anything really, or theycould do the same thing to rocks and so on). Papyrus finds their ability veryintriguing and asks them all kinds of questions about it (mostly the sciencebehind it and what all they can exactly do). He now asks them to turn whateverhe’s drinking into honey (unless it’s water, then he’ll ask them to turn itinto wine and chuckles). He’ll ask them occasionally to turn something randominto something else just to watch how it transforms.

[get-dunked-on-18]

Toriel got a strange look on her face, as if she were trying to remember something. She seemed to dismiss whatever thought it was.

"Is it sensitive at all? Some scars lose feeling, but this crack is deep." Toriel's other hand pressed against his, against his cheekbone, dwarfing the small phalanges and carples.

Sans glanced away.

"No, it doesn't hurt. So you have nothing to feEEE--!" Sans was cut off by the sudden feeling of wet and warmth in his left socket. He shivered at the sensation, his eyelight going out with the temporary intrusion. With his one eyelight he could see the queen's face up close, and the appendage offending his eye must be her tongue. It pressed up against the crack, into the crack, and Sans didn't like that.

"Um! I uh!!!" He tried to say, warring with his want for her to stop and his secondary desire to please his partner.

"Does it hurt after all?" She asked, although her tongue returned to fiddling with the old injury.

"No! It. Doesn't hurt, but? I uh..."

"Hm. Do you like it?" She pulled her mouth away then, smirking down at the small monster. His face was flushed, not because he did, in fact like her tongue in his eyesocket, but because he was embarrassed that he'd said anything at all. It wasn't that unpleasant, but he definitely didn't want it to continue. It felt weird.

"N-no. I don't like it, actually!" Sans blurted.

"No?" Toriel stroked his face with her thumbs. "You love being teased, though, don't y--"

"No? I don't? Not...my eye sockets." His voice dropped almost to an uncharacteristic whisper with the fonal part. Sans was hesitant, trying to read his queen's expression. Toriel chuckled softly. She still had a smirk on her face. He hadn't shown a moment's hesitation since the first time she'd suggested they touch souls, and he was unsure how she would react. He'd vowed his everything, and if she really wanted to she could...stick things in his sockets, he could get used to it if it was something she wanted.

"You're sure?" She asked, continuing before he could respond with, "is there anywhere else you do not want me to..." she trailed off.

Sans shook his head, not trusting his mouth not to embarrass him further.

"Here?" She asked, tipping his head back to nip at his jaw.

"Oh? That's fine."

"And here?" She asked, licking over his front teeth. He opened his mouth for her, allowing her to trace his teeth. He couldn't help but conjure his own tongue to twine with hers. His right hand gripped tight into the fur at her thigh, where it had been just resting. She broke away, and he took a second to reply.

"That is an excellent place for your tongue to be." His grin grew as her hands delicately slid down around his collarbones.

"Another keen choice."

Her fingers wrapped around his ribs, feeling how his chest was moving with deeper breaths now.

"There too."

"And..." her hands fell to his pelvis, hands sliding inside his shorts, nearing his pelvic inlet.

"Here?" The moment she touched his sensitive tailbone, his mouth was back on hers with a quiet growl. The telling of the old story about the injury he didn't remember, was also forgotten. He stood on his knees for leverage, wrapping his hands around the back of her head, kissing her deeply.

"I thought you'd been getting dressed?" The queen asked, in that knowing, teasing tone she used often.

"It would have been foolish to assume I'd be going home tonight," he came back, slowly pushing her back onto the bed. She still had her hands in his pelvis, and she pinched at the bone there, earning a hiss from the skeleton.

Okay so there's a sfw version also posted to my sfw blog. I scrapped the second half of the comic because it's weird, in hindsight, that he would actually like a tongue to the eyesocket, idk.

Yes, they've just finished doing the frickle and yes they're going to do it again. Swap Sanses have stamina.

Also, Papyrus went through some really fishy dealings in order to not only save Sans's eyesight, but his life. Sans was 13, almost 14, Papyrus was 22.

[flower-angel]

Endless Madness part 2

Characters will be OC from canon. The Fell!Afterdeath family will be refer as is Fell!Geno= Mass (Short for massacre), Fell!Reaper= Grim, Fell!Goth= Cupcake or Lotus, and Dark Tempest= Tempest or Dark. Also, since original Geno considers underfell Papyrus as his stepbrother, why not make underswap Papyrus Fell!Geno’s stepbrother! Enjoy! here’s the link to Dark Tempest dress => Dress, shoes, and cape Part 1   Part 2 (here)    Part 3

Fell!Goth belongs to @nekophy Fell!Geno & Fell!Reaper belongs to @nateeew Dark Tempest belongs to @flower-angel/ @lovephantomsnow Original Reaper belongs to @renrink Original Geno belongs to @loverofpiggies Underswap brothers belong to the undertale community

“Kill me…”

“Sorry, but no can’t do. Now stop complaining, you don’t see Lotus fuzzing about his clothing.”

Grim pointed to the laughing and smiling Lotus, the young baby bones was dress in a very cute bear onesie.

“He’s a baby! You can dress him up in a frilly dress and he won’t care! Besides…Did it have to be so girly?!”

Dark Tempest was wearing a lovely pink Lolita gothic dress with matching heels and accessories. She looked adorable, which she hated.

“Enough complaining. Your uncle Blue went to the trouble of finding something that you will like. If you do have to blame someone, blame your father. Grim showed him a picture of you in some of your older dresses.” Mass said.

Dark Tempest was now glaring at her father, Grim just gave ignore it. She wanted to give him a piece of her mind, but was distracted by Lotus’s cry for attention. She was going to comfort her brother, only for Mass to scoop him up first.

“Can you at least tell me why I have to go with you guys to visit the Swap brothers? Especially now of all times?” She tried to sound indifferent with the whole situation. Although, she was excited and afraid to finally meet her uncles for the first time in her life (excluding Fell reaper Papyrus).

“They wanted to meet their dear niece, once they found out they had one.” Mass causally said, as he feed Lotus a bottle of milk.

Tempest tried to ignore the pulsing pain in her chest. She had found it strange that her step-uncles never asked for her presences or visit her. Especially with how her parents describe them as “cheerful” and “caring”. Only to find out that she was never mention, was heart breaking.

“…If they make me go shopping for clothing, both of you will have to take care of cupcake until I reap all the souls from the big list.” She let out a false lie and grimace to hide her sadness.

“Deal!” Grim enthusiastically agreed, while Mass had a face of dread.

****************************

*Inside the Underswap brother’s home*

“HELLO DEAREST NIECE! IT IS I, YOUR UNCLE, THE MAGNIFICENT SANS! I ALSO GO BY BLUE! IT IS SO GOOD TO FINALLY MEET YOU! THERE IS SO MUCH WE HAVE TO CATCH UP ON!” Blue said while hugging the living life out of Dark Tempest.

In the background, Grim was laughing at his daughters’ dismay. Mass was entertaining Lotus with a rattle.

“Bro, she needs to breathe.” Underswap Papyrus said.

Blue looked at his adorable niece, to see that his brother was right. “I’M SORRY!” Blue then let her go. Tempest fell to the ground and started to swallow as much air as her non-existing lungs could take.

“Sorry about that, kiddo. Your uncle Blue can get a bit enthusiastic. I’m your uncle Papyrus, I also go by Stretch.” He helped her up to her feet again.

“It’s nice to meet you too, uncle Blue and uncle Stretch? And its fine.” She hoped that it came out forgiving.

There was a long awkward pause, Lotus called for his sister’s attention. Soon there was a comfortable atmosphere where everyone just talked and snacked on treats.

Dark Tempest was enjoying the small moment, even if she did not engage in any conversation. For once, she felt safe and comfortable in her parents’ presence.

“You look so cute in that dress!” Blue said, scaring Tempest to let out a small shriek. “Shame on both of you for not mentioning her sooner!” Blue scold Grim and Mass.

“Don’t blame us, you never asked if we had any kids before Lotus was born.” Grim pointed out.

“That’s no excuse, mister! Do you have any idea how much quality time we had lost?!” Blue was fuming.

 “Blue, just let it go. It is somewhat our fault for not asking them if they had any other kids. Besides, now’s a perfect time to get to know her.” Stretch said.

“Your right, Brother! So Dark Tempest, tell us about yourself! Do prefer Dark or Tempest? Do you like puzzles? Do you love your dress? What’s your favorite color? How old are you? What are your hobbies? Do you have a cellphone? If you do, what’s your number? My is xxx-xxx-xxxx. Do you have a crush on someone?”

“…uh…I-I my either, but most use Tempest. I don’t like or dislike puzzles? I do like the dress, especially since it’s very comfy. I don’t really have a color preference, so���yeah. I’m fifteen… My hobbies are cooking, baking, and reading. I do have a cellphone and my number is xxx-xxx-xxxx. No, I don’t have a love interest.” She monotony responded, with a small blush on her face.

“Okay…uh, is there something we should know? Allergies, phobias, something of that nature?” Stretch tried to keep the float of the conversation going.

“I don’t have any allergies, although, I don’t like spice food much and I don’t like coconut. I don’t have any phobias... I work as a reaper, so don’t worry if I’m out too late or long…HURT CUPCAKE AND I WILL END YOU.” She said all this with a straight face, until the end.

“…Who’s Cupcake?” Blue hesitantly asked.

“Cupcake is Lotus, I just like calling him that.” Tempest said, as she took Cupcake from Mass’s hands and snuggled him.

“More like she didn’t know his name and just called him Cupcake for a month.” Mass said, while Tempest denied the claim.

“Which reminds us…” Stretch pulled a hidden rope from somewhere, which led to a sequence of events that resulted in balloons, confetti, and cheerful music being played.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARK TEMPEST!” Everyone shouted.

“…”

“Whoa, I think you out did yourself this time Blue, you left her speechless.” Stretch lazily commented.

“But of course! It will be a disgrace if I did less than my best, especially for our niece’s first birthday party as a family!”

“…”

“I think you broke her.” Grim commented.

It took five minutes for her to react, by then all anyone could hear were inaudible nonsense from the cherry red girl. After that, the party began.

*************

The birthday celebration ended a few hours ago, where everyone did enjoy themselves with games and food. The Afterdeath family took their sleeping children home and tuck them in into their bed.

“It’s cute how Tempest reacts to the simplest of gestures.” Grim commented randomly.

“…It was nice to see a side of her that was different from her hollow or sassy self.” Mass chip in.

Once they put Lotus to bed, they retired to their room.

“Grim…do you think we’re too hard on her?” Mass softly said.

“We have to be tough with her love. It’s kill or be killed in our world.” Grim replied with defeat in his voice.

“She grew up too fast.”

“…I know. Let’s just hope that it will help her in the future.”

[skeletorific]

Hello, may I request a fluff imagine/headcanon? How would UT and UF Sans (who I imagine are space nerds) react to finding out that their s/o (who they've recently started dating) works at a planetarium/observatory complex when the s/o takes them on a date there? They also tell them the reason they kept their work a secret is because they didn't want to appear like a huge nerd in front of the cool skele. Oh, and the skele can come by anytime as long as the s/o worns their boss beforehand

UT!Sans: Okay, it will be a MIRACLE if he doesn’t already know. Sans spends a lot of time at the planetarium. Given that monsters went Underground centuries ago their understanding of astronomy is way, waaay behind the times. He’s done his best with the sci-fi novels and occasional textbooks that fall into the dump, but it's very piecemeal and sometimes hard to tell what’s real and what’s just a sci-fi trope. After he and Papyrus get settled he spends a lot of time wandering and figuring out what he can. He’s relieved the moon landing was real (or was it…no its real).

He’s seen you a couple times but just assumed you were a regular like him (the dress code is basically just formal wear for you). You were pretty cute, and he ended up striking up a conversation after you’d ended up responding to his bad joke (”that solar system exhibit’s so nice I wanna put a ring on it”) with one of your own (”yeah, must’ve taken a long time to planet”). 

You’d talked for a while and he’d walked away for your number. Normally Sans isn’t the type to move fast but clearly, there was some kind of gravity at work here (heh) so it wasn’t long before you’d had a first date. Then a second.

Third date planning went something like this:

Sans: what do u think, brave enough to try Paps spaghetti again tonight?

You: as appealing as that sounds, I’ve got work late tonight :’(

Sans: nooo

You: yeah…

Sans: eh, it's okay. can always try for another night

A pause. And an idea struck you.

You: u know what? Meet me at the planetarium at 10 with some food.

Sans: ok?

Sans: u don’t have time to get to my house but have time to get to a closed planetarium in the middle of nowhere?

Sans: that sounded sarcastic tbh i’m sorry

You: you’re good xD. and trust me. it's a surprise ;)

Sans oooh~

He showed up at ten on the dot, not late for once and holding McDonald's. He looked around for you on the front steps when the locked doors opened and you were on the other side, trying to stifle an excited grin. “hey”

“uh, hey. How did you….” he smacked his forehead. “I’m an idiot. you work here?

”yeah. I mean, to be fair to you, I’m upper management, so I don’t wear the uniform.” You held the door open for him and he walked inside.

“still, might’ve picked up on it. how come you acted all mysterious about it?”

“I dunno.” You led him down the dimly lit hallway, shrugging. “its kind of nerdy, I guess? not like the glamourous nerdy, like NASA or something. Like, low budget never enough funding nerdy.”

“hey, what part of this made you think I wasn’t into nerdy?” He gestured to himself.

“I don’t know, it's dumb. and I’m hungry” You made a grab for the food and he pulled it out of your reach.

“hmm, I dunno..” His perpetual grin widened and he waved the bag tauntingly. “don’t know if secret keepers deserve food…”

You grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him in for a brief kiss. He flushed bright blue and you took advantage of this to snatch the bag out of his hand and stuff some fries in your face.

“heh, you play dirty, kid”

“always”

“so what did you want me to see?”

“Same reason I had to stay late” You rolled up the bag to save the rest for later. “we’re opening a new special exhibit, and well…got special permission from my boss to give a special tour.”

“…..you didn’t”

“I did” You grinned

“you didn’t”

“come on” you grabbed his hand and pulled him along

It was a small theatre with about twenty seats in it. You led him to the front row and then dug around in your bag, pulling out two pairs of 3D glasses and handing one to him. “its this recreation of a satellite’s path. Goes out pretty far and the effects are fan-fucking-tastic” You sat down next to him

He wrapped an arm around your shoulder. “hey i think i’m in love with you, is that normal?”

You stuffed some fries in his mouth, smiling. “just don’t spill food, the janitor will murder me.”

You sat there in content silence for the full thirty minutes, listening to the narration as it took you on a tour of the galaxy. You’d seen the video a lot of times at this point and spent most of it watching him.

He looked like a kid at a theme park. It was honestly kind of adorable. Sans didn’t show open excitement often, but he was so lost in the film and the visuals that he wasn’t at all self-conscious about his facial expressions. His smile was wider than you’d ever seen it and he kept squeezing your shoulder whenever something particularly cool came on screen.

You settled against him. Enjoying the silence and the warmth, and the moment between you.

UF!Sans: “what is this uniform even for?”

“stop going through my clothes, ya creep,” you said, snatching the blue polo out of his hands and pulling it on.

“up until about five seconds ago you were naked but it's noticing the clothes that make me creepy” Red sat up and stretched, pulling back the blankets on the bed.

“no one ever said I made sense” You pulled on some dark slacks too, turning to the mirror leaning against the corner and trying to get your hair into something approaching decent shape. 

Red sidled up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist, pressing toothy kisses along the crook of your neck. “sure you gotta go?”

“yeah, got work.” You smiled, humming softly at the attention.

“could call in sick…” His hands crept lower, towards your hips. “stay a little longer…”

You flushed and gently pulled his hands off.“ my boss would actually kill me.”

“trust me, your boss ain’t seen nothin like me yet” He grinned.

“hey, be nice to my boss, I actually like this job” You adjusted your shirt.

“like it so much you won’t even tell me what it is.”

“is it important that you know?” You pull on some shoes

“nah, just a weird thing for me to not know.” He rolled his neck, groaning softly.

“I’ll tell you someday” You pulled on a jacket and grabbed your keys.

“unless I find out first” He smirked sharply.

“that threat would be a lot more credible if you were wearing pants right now instead of just boxers”

“that a challenge?”

“take it how you will. I gotta go”

“hey” You turned your head to face him and he caught you in a slow, soft kiss. “have a good day”

You smiled. “yeah. you too.” And with that, you were out the door.

You’d been seeing Red for a couple months now. What the battle-hardened, rugged, smooth-talking skeleton saw in you you’d probably never know, but all that mattered right now was that his jokes made you laugh (even the bad ones) and his kisses left you weak at the knees. You’d be an idiot to give that up.

Which….is probably why you hadn’t told him about your job. Like, you hadn’t been actively hiding it or lying to him or anything. But you’d skirted questions and tried to avoid talking about anything that happened at work. Red was a badass. And you were slowly realizing that he was probably a genius too, based on what little he told you of his life Underground. And there was something kind of embarrassing about telling a person like that that your place of work was a planetarium gift shop.

As if you needed more reasons to feel inadequate next to him. You knew you were being kind of stupid about the whole thing, and you kept meaning to tell him. But every time you’d get so nervous about what he might say or think that you couldn’t make yourself.

Which was a shame, because you really did like your job. Sure, some of the customers could get a little annoying, and the pay wasn’t super great. But there were definite perks. Watching little kids chatter excitedly about planets and comets and asteroids to their parents/teachers. Getting to wander around the exhibits on your breaks and after work. Even the occasional chance to talk to guest speakers in between lectures. You were fascinated by space and space-related stuff. No interest in becoming an astronaut or even an astronomist but you loved the opportunity to learn in a more casual setting.

Still, by the end of your shift, you were ready to get home and clean up for your date. You and Red were planning on going to a movie.

One problem. You couldn’t find your keys.You dug around in your pockets, the break room, even the space behind the counter in case they fell out, but nothing. You searched for nearly forty-five minutes, making a general nuisance of yourself to the person who came to swap you out.

Your phone buzzed.

Red: where are you?

You: sorry, still at work, can’t find my keys. be home soon

Red: want a lift?

You: you don’t know where I am.

Long pause.

You: Sans-

Before you could send it you heard a familiar, amused voice behind you. “really should know better than to leave your location on, doll~”

You yelped, nearly dropping your phone as you whirled around. “Red-!”

“so, where are we-’ His voice dropped off and his eyes went wide as he took in his surroundings. 

Your face slowly grew redder. “I…..I know its nerdy and I swear I was gonna tell you eventually but…” Your voice died off as you realized he was chuckling. “….what’s so funny?”

“stars, doll.” He hooked his fingers under your chin and pecked you on the lips, eyes lidded. ‘if I believed in soulmates i’d say you’re getting pretty damn close to one.”

“….you’re into space?” Your cheeks felt like they might catch on fire but your heart leaped in your chest. 

“uh…” His turn to look slightly awkward. He rubbed the back of his head. “yeah, honestly. one of those interests I keep on the down low, but…yeah.”

“…do you want a tour-”

“yes”

The movie fell by the wayside (you found your keys in your car later on). You walked, handing hand through the planetarium, and got to watch as your gruff and tough boyfriend turned into a hyperactive twelve-year-old over all of it.

Comforting to know deep down, he was just as big a nerd as you are.

[skeletorific]

How would Raspberry react if Salt's store was being robbed and Salt and the rest of their co-workers were being held hostage while they robbed it?

YAAAAS Saltberry makes a long-awaited (okay maybe just by me) comeback. Anyways, I’m setting this after Rasp has been nurturing this crush for a few months, and most of the staff is pretty familiar with him at this point. This’ll be written from the perspective of Salt. Forgive me length gods, I couldn’t resist a mini-fic

You know, when they cover what to do in the event of a hostage situation, most of us just laugh it off during orientation.

Because really, who’s gonna try? This isn’t LA or some shit like that. This is a crummy department store, in a shitty mall, in the middle of stars-who-cares. The closest we get to importance is we’re right at the foot of Ebott, but really, before monsters left and we all discovered maybe they weren’t as shitty as we all thought, who wanted to live next to a hive of potential bloodsuckers that could crack open at any minute?

So yeah, they cover it in orientation. Procedures, tactics to avoid enraging the assailant, how to spot a bulge that might be a gun. Its always a joke among the new kids on that day of training. They point to men with baggy shirts and say in mock serious tones “Better keep an eye on that one.” I did the same thing. You delete the information to leave space for the shit-ton of buttons on the cash register and uniform regulations you need to remember and move on with your day.

So needless to say, when the guy pulled a gun on Sadie and started screaming at all of us to get on the ground, we didn’t exactly move in orderly fashion.

I was just at the next till when it happened. Why didn’t I spot the gun bulge? Well, truth be told, I was fantasizing about leaving. Just ten minutes left of my shift. Could’ve been on my way home, heard about it on the news. Now instead I’m sitting quietly where he can see me, phone and shoes in a pile with the others’ in the middle of the floor. Two other guys had come out of the woodwork and were helping him keep us in line.

The first guy made Lin and Marcus bar the doors to make sure security didn’t get in. At that point all of us were just trying to do what he said. All of us were essentially shaking in our boots and just going obediently with what he said. So they both got up, started barring doors…..and then Marcus had to be a hero and yell out the front door for Paul, the closest mall cop, to do something. Got a bullet in his shoulder for his trouble.

That’s when it went from a shitty event to a nightmare.

Fortunately, Dani, our manager, knows a thing or two about first aid. The guy with the gun let her patch Marcus up (poor guy was in a lot of pain, but trying to be brave. Or maybe he was just stupid.) But that didn’t solve the problem outside.

Paul, fortunately, knew better than to charge in guns blazing. He called the cops (I assume) because pretty soon the closest thing our town has to a SWAT team showed up. A bunch of guys in dark blue, all posted outside with guns drawn, trying to look like they knew what the hell they were doing.

If I sound bitter…..yeah, I am. But in this case its more coping than just my usual sparkling personality shining through. I think I find it easier to deal with stuff if I make fun of people who are there for the stuff.

Anyways, the guy was one step ahead, clearly. He set us up with shifts. We would all take turns taking long pacing walks in front of all the entrances, windows, and exits, thus providing no clear line of fire. Meanwhile, he got on the phone with their negotiator (who must have been thrilled that his job title suddenly had purpose) and started swapping deals. He kept his henchmen patrolling around, making sure we didn’t sneak off.

Guess who got to be part of the human shield?

I was near the back exit, walking back and forth across the open fire exits. I took in the sight of the store.

Aside from the Three Stooges there weren’t that many customers left. It had almost been closing time (something I figure could only be cruel irony on God’s behalf). Most of them were just the staff. Marcus was leaned against a stack of soda boxes. The makeshift bandage Dani had made out of pads and duct tape was already starting to soak through, but he had on a shaky smile as he chattered with the manager. Dani was trying her best to hold it together (always the natural leader my high school had been so enthusiastic about) but her stress was showing, understandably. Sadie was a sobbing mess on the floor and trying to get a handle on herself. She was pretty shook up from a gun being drawn on her. One of the customers had an arm around her and was trying to calm her down.

One of the henchman was pacing pretty close to me for a while, but I think he figured I was no Marcus and so went to go check something with his Boss. That was when I suddenly heard a swift beating of footsteps and suddenly a tap on my shoulder.

I turned fast, ready to tell that person to get the hell out, when I found myself face to face with a skeleton a couple of inches shorter than me.

There was a time that sentence would have been cause for confusion.

But this was Sans, one of the monsters that had moved in when that Chara kid freed the Underground. I saw him a lot around the store with his brother, Papyrus. They hung around almost every day for some reason. We weren’t exactly friends (I’m a firm believer in not having friends that have anything to do with this dead-end job) but he was decent company and seemed to find me less annoying than most people here.

“Sans, what the he-” he put a finger to his….teeth I guess (I’m still no expert on skeleton anatomy terms) and pointed up to the ceiling. Quicker than I could blink (or fortunately, henchman #1 could turn to see him) he disappeared into a nearby vent shaft, just big enough for his small form. Depite being so small (or perhaps because of it) he could move pretty fast when he wanted to. He crawled along the vent shaft as I continued pacing, heart pounding slightly.

“WHAT HAPPENED.” he said, his muttering voice muffled somewhat by the metal shield. “I HEARD REPORTS OF POLICE OUTSIDE THE STORE BUT DIDN’T WAIT AROUND TO FIND OUT WHY.”

“See the three guys with the guns?” I said, trying to move my mouth as little as possibly (never had those ventriloquism skills of my Uncle Pat been so enviable). An affirmative grunt came from the vent. “Yeah, they’re the problem. Where’s your brother?”

“LURKING, AS USUAL.” For a guy who usually made so much noise he was quiet as all hell crawling along those vents. “HE’LL COME WHEN I SIGNAL.”

“Look, I appreciate the help, but are you sure you want to do this?” I looked at Marcus again. “These guys have already shown they’re not shy about firing those things.”

There was a low chuckle, that I swear to hell legitimately said MWAH HA HA.  “TRUST ME, WE’VE DEALT WITH WORSE. HAVE THEY HURT YOU?”

“No, I’m fi-”

“Hey! Who’re you talking to?”

Shit. Henchman #2 strides towards me, pistol waving at his side menacingly.

“Uh….n-no one, I wasn’t….wasn’t talking.”

“Don’t bullshit me, I saw your fucking lips move!”

“I…I….” I did my best to look scared stupid. Wasn’t much of a reach. “I was praying!”

The guy looked at me disbelievingly and then rolled his eyes. Suddenly he caught sight of my name tag. “Hey, Jack.” he said, and Henchman #1 looked over. “This one’s a supervisor. Bet they know how to get into that safe in the office.” He shoved the pistol under my jaw and I swear I heard a low growling noise from the vent, or maybe it was just the AC kicking in. “Can you open it?”

“Um…I….” Hand one: I do not want to go any fucking where with this guy. Hand the other: based on the gun-waving I don’t like my odds if I lie. “Yes!”

“Dude, I don’t know, I think boss said not to leave the main area….” Jack said, looking nervously at the guy on the phone.

“I’ll be quick.” he said dismissively, pressing a gun to my head and shoving me forward. “They’re the only one we’ve found who could even open the damn thing anyways, and the cops are taking to damn long.”

I trot forward, shaking slightly. I look sidelong at Dani. She had to borrow a uniform shirt today since her manager’s shirt was in the wash, which was likely why they hadn’t picked her out. There was a deeply selfish part of me that wanted to throw this on her, but even I’m not that much of a scumbag. I just pray Sans works out whatever he’s doing with his brother soon.

We continue on into the manager’s office, and I’m shoved down none too lightly by the safe where I start shakily working on the combination. Its an old keypad lock that doesn’t always remember you pushed the buttons you pushed, so I have to keep trying the combination.

Despite his gung-ho attitude moments before Pistol isn’t looking too self-assured at the moment. He keeps looking over his shoulder like he’s expecting his boss to burst in and yell at him, and he’s telling me to hurry up. My mind’s racing, trying to figure out how I can use this to my advantage but with the muzzle point blank I don’t think there’s much I can do.

“What the fuck is taking so long?”

“I….I don’t know.” I know for sure I entered the combination right the past three times, what is……I freeze. Once a year we’re required to rotate out the combination. Today was that day, and Dani hadn’t had the chance to tell me today.

“I…..can’t do it.”

“What?!”

“They changed the combination.” Much as I hate myself for it my hands are shaking. Holy shit I could get shot over this. “I can’t get in.”

“You piece of shit!” Suddenly there’s a blow like the hand of God on the side of my head, and there’s a moment when I think I’m already dead as I land on my back. But he didn’t shoot me, just smacked me with the butt of his gun so hard stars are lining my vision. “Why the fuck did you tell me you could?”

He’s approaching me, hands poised to strike again, and all I can do is look away, head throbbing in pain.

A smack, a grunt, and a thud. None of which were connected with me and my person.

Tentatively, I open my eyes. Sans is crouching in front of me, Pistol on the ground, dead or unconscious, I don’t know. “ARE YOU ALRIGHT?”

“I….” I blink hard a few times, the pain distracting from everything else, but in this instance I know ‘fine’ means mobile, not actually fine. “Yeah….”

He puts up three gloved fingers. “HOW MANY PHALANGES?”

“Three…”

He helps me to my feet and turns my head to inspect the wound. “A BIT OF BLOOD, BUT I DON’T THINK YOU’LL HAVE A CONCUSSION FOR THIS. YOU’RE VERY LUCKY.”

“Is that what I am?” I say, chuckling ruefully and wincing immediately after.

“OF COURSE.” He says it matter of factly, releasing my head. “I’M HERE NOW.”

I pause. “….Right. So, uh,” I look at the still unmoving Pistol. “Thanks for the save and everything, but do we have a plan.”

“WE’VE HAD A PLAN FROM THE MOMENT I WALKED IN, YOU BEING CAPTURED JUST DETOURED IT SLIGHTLY.” He picked up the gun and handed it to me. “HERE. YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO USE IT, BUT JUST IN CASE.”

“Um….don’t you want it?” Out of the two of us he strikes me as the one more likely to know how to aim and shoot it, but he looks mildly offended.

“DO I LOOK LIKE I NEED YOUR PITI-….HUMAN WEAPONS?” he said.

“Alright, alright, tough guy.” I say, taking the gun. I know I’m probably holding it wrong, but the weight does feel secure in my hands. “Now what.”

He pulled out his phone and started texting. “TIME FOR MY BROTHER TO START PULLING HIS WEIGHT.”

There’s a joke here about how much a skeleton can weigh, all told, but I don’t know if that’s offensive or not. He sends the text and then stands patiently.

“……Is something supposed to be-”

He cut me off by holding up a single finger, smirking like he knew exactly how cool he was going to look in just a second.

A thunderous boom from the next room, followed by someone yelling “WHAT THE FUCK!”

We both run out of the office to see his brother Papyrus standing in the middle of the room, hand raised over his head, and what looks like a giant bony dragon head floating by him, mouth charged with energy. Jack is already down, smelling like singed hair, while Sans’ pet pig stands triumphantly over his body. Their boss is shakily pointing a gun at him, looking terrified. Papyrus has a quiet smirk on his face, clearly somewhat relishing the situation. The customers look freaked out,  but most of the staff just look relieved.

“GOOD WORK.” Sans says. “NOW LET’S FI-”

Panicked, the boss had whipped around and fired, I suddenly felt myself being shoved out of the way, hitting the ground, and a sudden groan of pain. When I look up, Sans is clutching his arm and gritting his teeth.

“Chief!” Papyrus yells. With a sudden fury, he turns the Blaster on the guy, hitting his with a blast of energy so bright it’s blinding. The boss collapses to the ground….and based on the smell I don’t think he’s getting back up.

But no time to think about that now. I get to my feet. “Holy shit, Sans….”

He’s groaning in pain and trying not to show it, but there’s a thin pallor of sweat on his skull somehow. Near as I can tell it just clipped his arm, but there are red numbers hovering over his head are growing smaller and smaller at an alarming rate. .6666. .5555. It holds steady at .45555 but he’s looking decidedly worse for wear and suddenly has to lean against me for support. He looks….oddly vulnerable, for a guy I’m used to seeing as just this unstoppable force of terror.

I don’t have long think about this, though. His brother comes and picks him up, looking torn between worry and exasperation. “Come on, you little idiot.” he mutters, taking off his jacket and wrapping him up in it. It smells like the cigarettes Dani’s always having to tell him not to smoke in the store. “Let’s get you patched up.”

“Uh…wait.” I say. All around me, people are starting to get up. The cops seem to know the threat’s been handled enough, so they’re charging in, and its a flurry of chaos and activity. “Can I….come with?”

“We’ll be okay.” he say, but then he catches a look at my face. I don’t know what he sees there, but I think he can tell I’m trying to pay them back best I can. “Alright, grab my arm.”

I do, a little nervously. I’ve seen him teleport before, but this’ll be my first time experiencing it. There’s a sudden tingling sensation….and I find myself in front of a small house. Papyrus brushes past me and knocks on the door.

A scaly blue woman with fish eyes and bright red hair opens it. “What are you doing here, it’s the middle of….” she sees the bundle in his arms. “Oh.” she sounds oddly neutral. Like its normal for him to show up with injured people.

“Its just a graze, but….”

“The 1 HP?”

Papyrus remains silent.

The woman sighs and opens the door wider, letting him walk past. He goes inside, and I follow. She suddenly pushes the door against me a little, looking suspicious.

“That’s Salt, they’re a friend.” Papyrus says, settling his brother on the couch and pulling his jacket off of him. “Let them in.”

The woman examines me up and down and then walks away, ignoring me to check on Sans but not stopping me. I walk in, closing the door behind me and standing awkwardly at the entrance to the living room. The fish woman is examining Sans with sure but curious fingers.

“You sure you won’t let me experiment a bit?” she says. “Might be able to find a way to help with that little….inadequacy of his….”

Papyrus growls in the back of his throat.

“Fine, fine.” She says it like this is a game she plays with him quite a bit. “He should be fine. A few ITEMs and some bed rest.”

“Babe, who was at the door?” The gravelly voice behind me makes me jump a bit and I turn to see a yellow dinosaur chick (I think it’s a chick). She’s a mass of scars and muscles, and a couple of inches taller than Sans. She glares at me with confusion.

“Who the hell are you?”

“Um…I’m….”

“I’m in here, Alphys.” The fish woman says, starting to tie a bandage around Sans’ humerus (since they’d started hanging around so much I’d been brushing up on my skeleton anatomy, all though who knows if they even called the bones the same thing.) He was starting to regain consciousness. “Ignore the human, they’re with Sans and Papyrus.”

Alphys nods like this settles it and pushes past me, standing solidly in the middle of the room. “What happened to you, runt? Somebody finally get tired of your mouth opening?”

Sans growled tiredly, eyelids flickering, and she chuckled. Despite the causticity I couldn’t really sense any malice for him in her voice.

“Just tell me you at least gave them worse.”

“DAMN RIGHT.” he said. He neglected to mention Papyrus was the one “giving them worse” but the taller skeleton didn’t seem to feel the need to protest. Suddenly his eyelights latched on me and he flushed somewhat (don’t ask me how the fuck that’s possible). “I…..I DIDN’T REALIZE YOU WERE HERE.”

Slowly, I came a bit closer. “Papyrus let me hitch a ride. How are you doing?”

“FINE.” he said quickly. Papyrus snorted, earning him a resentful look from his brother.

I kneeled by the couch, just to the fish lady’s right. “You….really saved my skin back there. Everyone’s skin, really. We could’ve been trapped there forever if you and Papyrus hadn’t come so….thanks.”

He makes steady eye contact with me for a minute, then turns away. “IT WAS NO TROUBLE. IT WOULD BE REGRETTABLE IF WE HAD TO SWITCH STORES. TEACUP WON’T EAT ANY OTHER BRAND OF FOOD.”

Papyrus’ eye sockets widened suddenly. “Shit!” and he suddenly disappeared.

Alphys raised a brow. “What was that about?”

It hit me. “Damn it, we left Teacup!”

Sans’ eyes went wide and he looked furious. “WHAT?!”

Papyrus appeared a minute later with the pig, who calmly trotted over to her Master to snuffle worriedly at his side.

“YOU IDIOT! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, LEAVING HER, ANYTHING COULD’VE HAPPENED!”

Papyrus took the chastising, looking apologetic. I felt bad for him, so I stepped in, scratching behind Teacup’s ears. “He was just worried about you. Besides, can you imagine anything hurting this little porker? She’d trample them before they got the chance.”

He looked both surprised and mollified. “I….YES, TEACUP IS ADMIRABLY TRAINED, BUT STILL, THAT’S NO EXCUSE TO-”

“Actually” I said, trying to keep the conversation off yelling at his brother. “Just had a thought, I should really do something to thank you.”

It startled him. “THERE….THERE’S NO NEED TO-”

“Nah, it’d be my pleasure. Come on, what can I do for ya?”

Sans looked ready to protest when Papyrus cut in. “How about you just come over some night to cook dinner for us and we’ll call it even.”

Sans shot him a look. “It’d be my pleasure.” I said, standing up. “Does tomorrow night sound alright to you? I’m pretty sure we’ll be closed. Even if we aren’t I think I’m taking a day off regardless.”

His mouth flapped open and closed for a second before he turned aside, flushing slightly. “…..TOMORROW NIGHT IS FINE.” he turned back. “I WARN YOU, MY COOKING STANDARDS ARE NOT EASILY MET.”

“Well, I’ll be happy to accept any tips.” I said, smiling slightly. I checked my phone’s clock. “Oh, shit, I should be getting home, my roommate’s gonna be worried sick.”

“I can take you home.” Papyrus said.

“Alright, cool.” I gave Teacup one last pat (she snorted appreciatively but kept her attention on Sans) and smiled one last time at Sans. “Seriously, thank you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He didn’t say anything, just nodded.

Papyrus put a hand on my shoulder, the tingling sensation returned, and suddenly we were outside my apartment.

“Our schedule’s pretty open tomorrow.” he told me. He gave me his number. “Just text us when you’re ready.”

“Alright. Thanks for the lift, and…..well, everything over the past couple of hours.”

He gave a quiet smile. “Like Chief would let anything get between Teacup and her treats.”

I laughed. “Well, happy to be of service. Good night.”

“Good night.” he said, and with that disappeared.

I honestly kind of liked this story. May do the follow-up story at some point about the dinner date, actually. Let me know if you guys would be interested in that.