#how we doin unis?

[snowstuckytrail]

Ok so I'm in the top 0.005% of listeners for Pentagon... I mean what can I do when all their songs are bangers amirite?

[justabunchofdragons]

helo >:) today is sunny & i am going to b productive

[mishellii]

♢ᴘᴇᴛ ɴᴀᴍᴇꜱ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ♢

naruto, sasuke, shikamaru, kiba, shino, neji, iruka & kakashi

a/n: sooo,, i SHOUld be working on my uni essays and on the bf!neji texts BUT this had been sitting in my notes app for a while so i decided to post it ;D (the neji texts will come soon i promise). some are longer, some are shorter for which i apologise,,,,,, please ignore typos, i can't spell & enjoy MWUAH

likes & reblogs appreciated <3

warnings: some NSFW parts! MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! :) also not proofread as usual

masterlist

♢ɴᴀʀᴜᴛᴏ ᴜᴢᴜᴍᴀᴋɪ♢

✿oh my baby boy

❀first off: angel. 100%.

✿because u are his angel u feel me

❀he can't go a day without telling u

✿then also just the basic baby

❀but mostly when he wants something from u or he's apologising for dumb stuff he's done

✿puppy eyes and all

❀and also during sexy time

✿it's his most used name for u there

✿fight me on this

❀big on his own self made nicknames for u

✿for instance: u fell down the stairs once?

❀"hey, stairs, how you doin'"

✿and just silly ones like: boo, pookie, apple of my eye

❀he's weird like that c'mon we been knew

♢ꜱᴀꜱᴜᴋᴇ ᴜᴄʜɪʜᴀ♢

✿now this guy is a wild card

❀he'd prefer ur name through & through

✿but he'd slip in a casual babe sometimes which makes ur knees weak obviously

❀because he barely ever calls u that

✿if ur married he'd only call you his wife

❀doesn't even let you answer questions on your own sometimes just so he can hit them with

❀"well, MY WIFE, thinks you suck ass, so.."

✿during sex he can be quiet mean 

❀I DONT THINK in the derogatory way but more in a teasing way

✿"c'mon, sweetheart, look at me."

❀when ur just about to black out??

✿but like i said 

❀not big on pet names but he'll use them more often if he knows u enjoy it <3

♢ꜱʜɪᴋᴀᴍᴀʀᴜ ɴᴀʀᴀ♢

✿pretty

❀just pretty bro.

✿not ALL THE TIME, especially not in public as i don't think he's big on PDA

❀but in the comfort of ur own 4 walls? definitely

✿now don't HATE ME for this but,,,

❀woman. and brat.

✿but only in petty situations, like when ur scolding his lazy ass and he hits u with a "go easy on me, woman, i just woke up."

❀or u've been going on his nerves while he's working

✿,,i'm busy, brat.''

❀in bed tho???

✿love or doll

❀i'm almost CERTAIN.

✿like,, can u imagine?? in his dumb fucking charming voice ???

❀PFFF i'm on my knees 

♢ᴋɪʙᴀ ɪɴᴜᴢᴜᴋᴀ♢

✿now this fucker

❀teasing names through & through

✿ur shorter than him? 

❀"hey, shortie, need help?"

✿ur taller than him?

❀"hey, giant, how's the weather up there?"

✿he's a DICK ok (affectionately ofc)

❀but he can be sweet too i promise

✿he's having fun with calling u bunny during sex or simply baby 

❀also ???? "okay, boss." when he's been annoying u all day and u finally snap at him?

✿he's a menace with nicknames i'm telling u

♢ꜱʜɪɴᴏ ᴀʙᴜʀᴀᴍᴇ♢

✿you probably guessed it and bully me if you'd like but,,,

❀bug or lovebug

✿come oooon he loves his bugs AND he loves you?? it fits PERFECTLY

❀not one to do it infront of other people either but in your private space he just wouldn't stop calling you one of these

✿i also see him using the regular honey but the abbreviation so hun because it's short and sweet and he doesn't like those long ass names

❀apologies if ur name is long LMAO mine is too tho

✿takes the hun into the bedroom but prefers a gentle love while having sex

❀shino's not a sweet talker in my mind, but the pet names make up for it FOSHOU

✿ALSO big brain idea i just had:

❀i think shino can't fully express his emotions verbally so before going on missions he definitely writes u letters and that's where he's blooming

✿''u keep me going everyday, sunshine.''

❀and it doesn't even matter if you have a bubbly personality or not

✿UGH lovesick fr

♢ɴᴇᴊɪ ʜʏᴜ��ᴀ♢

❀this pretty princess doesn't even know ur name when ur alone with him 

✿ESPECIALLY when ur texting

❀sweetheart, love & darling

✿he'd make u fall in love over again whenever he calls u one of those i'm just saying

❀because he's always so sincere when he's talking to u it drives me crazy just thinking about it 

✿during sexy time too, he would NEVER

❀& i will die on this hill 

✿NEVER use any degrading names for u

❀ur his baby don't make him do that

✿even when ur fighting, he'd always address u in such a kind way i'm actually going insane

❀"have you had dinner yet, dear?"

✿ sedate me pls

♢ɪʀᴜᴋᴀ ᴜᴍɪɴᴏ♢

✿AAA this guy

❀soo,, like father like son,,, angel

✿u can't change my mind

❀being the kind hearted person he is, it just fits u can't tell me off

✿but i will also say he'd use some funny ones in private because we all know he's just a silly lil guy deep inside

❀i'm thinking toots & peach

✿especially when greeting u !! like ''ey, toots, how's it going?''

❀during sex he will be quiet awkward at the start of ur relationship, settling in angel as he's most familiar with it at first

✿but after some time he'd pull a babydoll or gorgeous on u

❀i mean,,, i'd cry but idk about y'all

✿oVERALL he loves using pet names and wouldn't be opossed to u calling him some sweet ones as well <3

❀call him handsome and he'll go through the roof

♢ᴋᴀᴋᴀꜱʜɪ ʜᴀᴛᴀᴋᴇ♢

✿AHEM

❀so this man,,

✿at the start of ur relationship he's such a shy lil bean so he'll only use your first name

❀but once he's been with you long enough he gets so so comfortable

✿starts of with the regular baby because u are his baby aight.

❀his most frequently used one too i'd say

✿but then he'd go like 

❀"hey, beautiful." "y'alright, sweetheart?"

✿and idk about u but i'd faint

❀HE KNOWS ABOUT HIS AFFECT ON U TOO

✿uses it against u during sex SO OFTEN

❀grunting a "there y'go, darling." into your ear with a sly smirk on his lips 

✿i'm (s)creaming

❀but he's a very private person so don't expect too much of that in public !!

✿a side from a "yes, ma'am" when u tell him not to die on a mission <3

a/n: i hope this doesn't SUCK ahemm,,, and i'll see you beans next time bye bye x

devider by @enchanthings

[sturnioz]

hey

wait

what about

mechanic!matt…………..he been told you to get rid of your car but you don’t have the money for it, the uni semester has already been off to a chaotic start, and PLUS it was a gift from your grandpa on your 18th :(

i lowkey kinda fucked up this req and changed it a bit cos i struggled to write it :| i wrote meeting mechanic!matt for the first time instead my bad my bad my bad.

you're freaking out.

you're freaking out so bad you're teetering on the edge of a mental breakdown, overwhelmed by a storm of emotions as you stand in the middle of the auto repair shop.

you've been so stressed; your new semester had a chaotic start, your classes keeping you unbelievably busy. to make matters worse, you've also had a painful falling out with your best friend, the kind of rift that feels like a gaping wound. on top of that, you recent breakup still fucking stings and you feel like you're going to throw up every time you cross paths.

and now, as if the universe is conspiring against you, your car has betrayed you, refusing to start in the middle of the road when you were on your way home. (the embarrassment of having to call a tow truck had only made it worse).

the constant sounds of clanging metal and the low hum of machinery surrounds you, gnawing at your nerves, overstimulating you. you close your eyes and rub your temples, desperately trying to block out the flickering overhead lights that create disorientating flashes behind your eyelids.

the air was thick too, heavy with the scent of motor oil and burnt rubber, a pungent reminder of your current predicament that makes your stomach churn with nausea, and you feel an overwhelming urge to escape, to bolt out the fucking door and leave this place behind.

but you can't.

you can't abandon your car — your baby, a precious gift from your grandpa.

with a deep breath, you peel your eyes open, your teeth gnawing at your bottom lip as you scan the bustling shop for the beefy man who greeted you when you first arrived. you're desperate for answers, anxious to find out if your car is truly fucked.

oh god, you wanted to cry. the thought of the repair costs makes you stomach twist. how much money will you have to spend? money that you don't even have. panic instantly washes over you.

you're screwed. you're done. you're hopeless. you're—

"hey," a voice jolts you from your spiralling thoughts, and you snap around, bracing yourself to confront the man you were searching for, but instead, you're taken aback by someone completely different.

he stands before you, hair tousled, strands falling over his light blue eyes. he's wearing a snug black tank top and dark blue overalls, the sleeves casually wrapped around his slim waist, showcasing a patchwork tattooed arm. his hands are smeared with grease and oil, evidence of a long day spent working on cars, and he nonchalantly twirls a wrench around his finger while chewing gum, casualness radiating from him as he stares at you.

"how bad is she?" you dare to ask, your voice trembles slightly, a mix of fear and hope surfacing in your chest.

the corner of his lips twitches slightly at your words before he begins. "she's not doin' too good." your heart sinks, a lump forming in your throat as you brace yourself for what's coming. "for starters, your battery is dead, but there's some damage done to the ignition system too... s'likely that the stater's shot, and the alternator needs replacing too."

you swallow hard, the reality of the situation hits you like a punch in the gut, and the weight of his words settling over you like a heavy fog. "how... how much are we talking?"

"could be a couple hundred for the battery 'n starter, maybe more dependin' on what else i find when i dig deeper," his fingers rhythmically tap against the wrench in his hands, chewing his gum slowly as he admits, "not gonna lie t'you, sweetheart — s'not gonna be cheap."

"fuck," another wave of panic rises within you, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. you feel so helpless. "i uh, i don't, i.. i can't, i—"

"hey," he says again, his voice steady and soothing as he gets your attention. your watery eyes snap to his when you feel his hand touch your shoulder gently. you don't even care about the grease and oil staining your shirt right now. "take a deep breathe, yeah? in and out. eeeeasy."

you nod quickly, following his instructions, inhaling deeply through your nose and exhaling through your mouth, trying to regain control over the rapid beating of your heart. your skin feels clammy, and your head is fuzzy, but his calm demeanour seems to help anchor you.

"there we go.. that's it," he hums softly, squeezing your arm as he nods in approval. "now, talk t'me. slowly."

"i... i can't afford it," you whisper defeatedly. "i don't have a job right now, i can't. i don't know how i'm going to pay for all this."

he studies you quietly for a moment, his gaze shifting from concern to something more contemplative. "we can figure somethin' out... sellin' the parts might be—"

"no!" you blurt out, shaking your head sharply. the suddenness of your response catches him off guard, his eyebrows raising slightly in surprise at your defiance. "i'm sorry, i... i can't sell it."

he lifts his hand to scratch at his cheek, squinting his eyes as he processes your reaction. "you uh, y'not makin' this easy, sweetheart—"

"i know, but i can't sell it," you insist with a soft sigh. "it means a lot to me.. please? is there another way?"

he studies you again, standing in silence, and you hold his gaze, hoping he'll come up with a solution. you watch as he takes a step closer, lowering his voice as if he's sharing a secret.

"what if.. we work somethin' out?" he suggests. "i'll uh, i'll fix your car for cheap — maybe for nothin' if you do somethin' for me?"

"what are you suggesting?" you ask, curiosity piqued.

he grins, revealing his pearly whites as he chews his gum, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly as if he hadn't just proposed something so serious and sudden. he doesn't answer you, which makes you prompt the question again, and he keeps the grin on his face as he turns and walks further into the shop, casting a glance over his shoulder at you, a silent invitation to follow him.

[honeykyeom]

white noise / track 3: ghosts (teaser)

pairing: lee seokmin x afab! reader

series summary: your best friend seokmin has always been there for you. after a particularly rough heartbreak, you find out he's there for you in more ways than just one.

series notes: uni!au, best friends to lovers, friends with benefits, kpop 97 line antics and shenanigans (specifically seventeen & loona), 18+ (smut is outlined/warned beforehand)

teaser notes: suggestive kinda but no smut, seokmin is a SIMP, two idiots being idiots tbh and there's absolutely no way this could go wrong!!

teaser wc: ~900 words

a/n: heeey...... hey... how ya'll doin? yeah i never thought i would be far enough into writing that i could ACTUALLY post a teaser for the next track.. shoutout to my accountability buddy @smileysuh, ur the best babe. wouldn't want anyone else to cheer for my maybe 800 words a day lol. also congrats to @bitchlessdino my bb i can't wait to see you walk down the aisle so take this lil treat as a token of my love ♡ also pspspspsps @onlyseokmins (love u wife)

If you had told Seokmin that he would be in the position that he’s currently in, he’d think you’re full of shit.

But here he was, sinking into your sectional as you grind on his lap and making his head spin with the ease in which you pull at his roots. Seokmin keeps telling himself it’s a fantasy, one of his many recurring dreams where he’s finally with you, the person he’s been in love with for the past two years. He repeats it like a mantra, to will himself it’s all in his head until it’s something he can no longer deny when a moan leaves your lips, sounding more ethereal than any dream he’s ever had.

Seokmin’s lips slot between yours perfectly, his tongue gracing your bottom lip. Your mewls ring like bells in his ears, sweet and inviting–he can’t help but smile into your kiss. He’s determined to continue hearing your noises, his nerves firing against every logical thought in his brain.

The kitchen counter of your humble apartment is littered with chips, stray alcohol & red solo cups. Neither of you pay it any mind though, too preoccupied with the present moment as Seokmin’s hands graze your lower back and you straddle his hips, your bodies sinking further into the soft fabric of your sectional. 

Seokmin’s lips chase yours when you pull away from him, not wanting to lose your warmth. He’s completely dazed as you view him from above, eyes glazed over in lust and desire. You giggle, bringing your hand to his chin and supporting his head to keep his eyes on you. 

“Are you still with me, baby?” 

He blacks out at the pet name–his brain short-circuiting at the way your breath warms his skin as you speak, only getting enough energy to respond with a soft yes as Seokmin watches you smile at him.

It’s baffling how you have him under your spell and you’re oblivious to that fact. 

Seokmin slowly comes down from his high of the past 20 minutes–registering the words that you’re speaking to him.

“We need to talk.”

“About?”

“This…” you take a pause, your thumb caressing the soft skin of his chin as you focus on the oceans of brown in Seokmin’s eyes before you continue. “Us.”

Seokmin quickly sobers up, his hands removing themselves from your waist but laying purchase on your thighs. He tries his hardest to keep his composure–you’ve always been able to read him like a book, better than anyone else in his life. You were able to capture every tell with ease, down to a small eye twitch or throat itch. Knowing this, he finds it hard to believe you’re unaware of his feelings for you–the immediate red shade of his ears appearing when he’s in your presence.

‘Breathe’, he tells himself. He does just that before focusing back to the present moment, with you, instead of stuck in his own thoughts.

“Okay. What about us?”

“We need to establish some ground rules.” You take a quick pause, brief, but enough for Seokmin to notice the small drop of sweat growing on the tip of your eyebrow. “Just so we’re on the same page.”

“Ok then. Rule number 1?”

“This stays between us. Can’t tell the rest of the group.”

“Ok… Seems fair enough.. Rule 2?”

“No unusual PDA.”

Seokmin retorts with a small pout, “So I can’t hold your hand in public anymore?”

You bring a soft smile to your face, slightly giggling at the sincerity in his tone. Running your hand through his hair, you respond, “No, that’s not what I meant! We just don’t want to give ourselves away. So, hand holding between friends is okay.” Leaning closer into Seokmin, he’s suddenly falling into the swirls of color in your eyes and into a trance when your voice gets quieter as you speak. “But kissing,” you punctuate your statement by connecting your lips to his. Seokmin has to swallow a moan as he gets lost in you, pulling you closer and molding your body to his. His hands come to grasp at each side of your face, gentle yet desperate to keep you two moving in unison. 

His efforts were futile, though, as you pull away from him with a smirk, leaving him with the inability to catch his breath. “Isn’t allowed.”

Seokmin is only left able to stare at you, his hands feeling clammy as they still rest on your cheeks. His thumb brushes across your face, his own body heat making your skin hot to the touch. All he can do is chuckle, shaking his head at the predicament he’s found himself in before he’s looking back at you. “Okay. Fine. Is that it?”

“One last rule. No seeing other people without us talking about it first.”

‘Easy,’ Seokmin thinks, but he still has to play it cool.

Raising his eyebrows, a playful tone enters his voice as Seokmin asks, “So, we’re exclusive fuck buddies now?”

You roll your eyes. “Not exactly. It’s more of a safety thing, you know?”

“Yeah, I’ll pretend that you aren’t just keeping your jealousy in check.”

“Do we have a deal or not, Lee?”

You present your pinky finger in between you, a lighthearted ritual that holds the weight of the future of your relationship with Seokmin. It seems too lax for such a situation, but he knows this is as important to you as it is to him with the small appendage in front of him.

“Fine. Deal.”

hehe <3

[juyeonszn]

DREAMS COME TRUE

PAIRING kim younghoon x f!reader

WORD COUNT 1.36k

GENRES fluff,,, just fluff

WARNINGS mature language but are we surprised, the tamest thing i’ve written in what feels like years, uni!au, best friends to lovers, mutual pining but younghoon is kinda dumb and very dramatic, one (1) kiss scene but thats about it

SUMMARY younghoon has been in love with you since what feels like the dawn of time. he’s watched you fall for the wrong guys over and over again, too much of a coward to do anything about it. but you’re on the brink of graduation and he’s finally ready to let you know. he just hopes you feel the same.

MORE hi…. how yall doin…. LOL the juyeonszn comeback no one was expecting 🥳 i’ve been in a bit of a younghoon phase lately and i realized i was not showing him enough love so i present to u this lovely piece of younghoonery <3 this is also my submission for the @deoboyznet love letter collective event! huge thank u to @sungbeam for beta’ing i owe u my life beam </3

PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri @/deoboyznet @cloverdaisies @vernyangel @ericlvr

Maybe he should’ve told you how he felt about you during your dinner before prom senior year. The words sat on the tip of his tongue, waiting to be spoken into existence. It was the perfect moment. You were each other’s dates anyway. 

But then he chickened out—he didn’t think he deserved you. And perhaps that was only slightly true: for letting you slip through his fingers numerous times? Absolutely. But for everything else? The universe couldn’t help but pity him, too. 

There was also the time that your ex boyfriend cheated on you and you came crying to him in the middle of the night. He woke up and stayed awake until early hours of the morning just to comfort you. It wasn’t because he felt bad, but because he would do any and everything for you. While you curled in on yourself, cuddled into the safety of his arms, he debated telling you then, too. 

Time and time again, Younghoon has sat there and watched as you dated different guys. He sucks it up and deals with it because he’s afraid of rejection, but he also doesn’t want to ruin your friendship. You’ve been best friends since middle school, and that made him afraid that you’d always only see him as that. There was that saying that girls and guys could never just be friends. Unfortunately, that was the case for him, but maybe not for you.

Now here you are, the day before your college graduation, and Younghoon is once again torn between mustering up the courage to confess and putting this puppy love to rest. 

He told himself during your first year of university if he didn’t tell you at all during these four years, he would give up. You were both preparing for true adulthood and if he couldn’t lay himself bare for the person closest to him, he didn’t think it was meant to be. And well, time is running out for him. He had to speak now, or forever hold his peace.

Younghoon watches as you scamper around your apartment, gathering your things for graduation tomorrow. It was a hectic enough day without you worrying if you were going to lose something, or run late. You hang your cap and gown on the coat hook near your front door before dashing back into your room to make sure your outfit is put together. 

Even in the chaos of your zooming around, Younghoon still finds you absolutely breathtaking. You’re slightly sweating from all of your movement and from the heat of the rapidly approaching summer, but nevertheless, you look so beautiful to him. The decision that seemed so hard to make over the years feels pointless. The answer has been clear from the beginning.

“Y/N.”

You pause what you’re doing to look over at him, wiping your forehead with the back of your hand. Your cute, caught-off-guard expression has him nearly melting into the couch. He doesn’t understand why it took him so long to get it together. 

Your eyebrows furrow in confusion when he starts walking towards you. “Wha— Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine,” he says, his frame towering over you in a way that is never intimidating, only comforting. “I have something I need to tell you, though.”

“Can it wait? I’m a little busy here.” Your hands come to rest on your hips and it takes all of the strength inside of Younghoon to not pull you into his embrace and kiss you. He thinks he would die, and he has to survive the duration of this confession if he wants to see the other side. (The side where, hopefully, you finally become his, in the way he’s wanted for years.)

“It can’t, actually,” he breathes, a newfound, unwavering confidence taking over. “I think I’ve waited for too long.”

“You’re kinda scaring me,” you laugh, scratching the back of your neck. “What is it, Hoon?”

Speak now or forever hold your damn peace, Kim Younghoon.

“Y/N, I love you,” he starts, and when you open your mouth to say you already know that, he continues. “And not in the way I’ve told you since we were eleven. I love you in the way that I can’t go to sleep at night without wondering if you’re sleeping comfortably, too. I can’t wake up in the morning without wondering if you did that cute, little whine that you do when your alarm goes off. I think about my future constantly, even though it’s fucking terrifying, and you’re always in it. Not just as my best friend or my partner in crime, but as my forever partner, too. I’ve felt this way about for god knows how long now, but I’ve always just been too afraid of what it would do to our friendship if you didn’t see me the same way. I don’t want to sit back and watch you date these other guys who end up hurting you anymore. I want to be the one you go to for everything.”

When he finishes, his chest is heaving a little, practically spieling without taking a moment for air. Despite the strength he collected to say all of that out loud, he was still nervous and looked away from you as he did it. He’s making eye contact now though, and he’s freaking the fuck out because he can’t read you one bit.

You aren’t saying anything, just staring at him with your lips parted, and he thinks that's tenfold more frightening than if you were to yell and slap him in the face. Each second that passes in complete silence has his hands clamming up and his heart racing faster. He realizes how close he’s standing to you and takes a step back, and then another, then another, until he’s grabbing his things and scrambling to get out of your apartment. 

You hate him. That has to be it. You see him as a brother more than anything else and he just ruined it all. 

But the moment he steps foot into the hallway, you’re calling after him desperately. 

“Younghoon, wait!”

Your voice, laced with emotion, has him halting in place. He turns around to see you standing in the threshold of your door, eyes welled with tears. He’s only ever seen you cry when you're sad, when you’re heartbroken, and he prays to whatever higher being exists that he didn’t do just that to you. (He tries to ignore how gorgeous you look even when crying.)

“I— You can’t just say all of that and run away!” You’re full on bawling now and it has his eyes widening. “You’re so stupid, you know that? I’ve been in love with you since we were thirteen and you lent me your hoodie inside of the movie theater when I said I was cold. You’ve always cared so deeply for me, so unconditionally. How could I not fall for you? You made it so hard not to.”

Younghoon is stunned. He had no idea you felt the same because you’ve been so good at hiding your feelings from him unless you chose to show him something. “Why did you date all those guys then?”

“To make you jealous, you idiot,” you sniffle, laughing at his obliviousness. “You’re such a guy; it’s endearing.”

He pouts at your low-key insult, but it doesn’t really upset him. In fact, he feels like he’s soaring right now. Your feelings are mutual and it’s as if all is well in the world. He closes the space between you once again, lifting his arm to swipe away your tears. You nuzzle into his palm instinctively and he’s sure he’s a puddle on the ground.

“Can— Can I kiss you?” He braves himself to ask, searching your features for any indication that you didn’t want this. You nod, your own hand covering his. The sparkle in your eyes is more than enough confirmation for him and so he leans in.

When your lips meet, Younghoon wonders if he did something heroic in a past life. He feels a pleasant buzz all the way to the tips of his fingers. It’s everything he’s dreamed of. 

You’re everything he’s dreamed of.

© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost. 

[ourtearsofrain]

All Of Me (J.M.K/O.C) (Save a Horse Universe)

Summary: As their relationship develops, Austin knows that he needs to tell Josh a key aspect of his identity; but every time he tries, his nerves take over, afraid of losing him. He’s finally “forced” into the perfect opportunity as Josh gets handsy after their date, pushing aside his fears to tell him.

Pairings: Josh Kiszka x Male O.C.

Genre: angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, smut

Word Count:  6k

Warnings: discussions of negative experiences with past partners in relation to gender identity, brief explanation of biological sex anatomy from a trans man, crying, smoking/drinking wine, oral (M receiving), vaginal penetration (wrap it before you tap it), fingering, praise

A/N: This new addition to the SAHRAC Uni takes place fairly early on into their relationship, so a little after Salty Dogs, Anyone? (That being said, this is a fic within an established universe, so it definitely helps if you read at least Ride a Cowboy and Salty Dogs, Anyone? beforehand)

I wanted to wrap pride month up with this, I hope everyone had a very good, very gay June. Remember the first pride was a riot, led by trans women of color; trans people are and have always been a core pillar of our history in the fight for equal rights.

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“Good afternoon, darlin’.”

“Hey baby, how are you?” Austin closes his front door behind himself, clicking the lock into place as he resists the urge to grin at the pet name. Even after having been “official” for nearly two weeks, he still got butterflies at each little name Josh had bestowed upon him.

He slots his hand into Josh’s before offering him a ‘hello’ kiss, beginning their short walk towards the Saturday Market that they never missed. “Been doin’ alright. Doin’ even better now. How about you?”

“I’m good, and excited. I can’t wait to show you how to make that Basil and Pesto Pasta recipe. I swear to god, it’s the best thing you’ll ever eat.”

Austin cocks an eyebrow at him, amused at his enthusiasm and continuous claims of just how good this dish was. “Is that a promise?”

“You fucking bet it is. If you don’t like it, then… ok, I’m not exactly sure what’ll happen if you don’t, but that doesn’t matter cause you’re gonna love it.”

“Mhm, right. So, what do we needa get for it today?”

“Uhhh hold on,” Josh pats his pockets frantically, shifting through everything he kept shoved in each until he pulls out a tattered scrap of paper. “We’ll need some fresh basil and asparagus, and maybe a fresh lemon and bunch of garlic. Hopefully that pasta vendor is set up, we need linguine too. The rest of the ingredients I already have, so that should do it.”

He slips the paper back into his pocket as the market comes into view, the vendors set up along the edge close enough that the smell of their fresh produce and baked goods wafted towards the men as they crossed the street. “Sounds fantastic already, darlin’. Great choice for a late lunch.”

“I know right! It’s amazing, you’ll see.”

“Lotta big talk from you, Kiszka; you’re playin’ a dangerous game by raisin’ my expectations like this.”

“Only talking it up cause I know you’ll love it. I’d like to think that I know you very well, Austin. If I do say so myself.”

Don’t know everything about me… Austin rubs at the back of his neck nervously, his eyes finding the ground. “I actually wanted to talk to you about somethin’-”

“Oh. My. God.”

Austin’s mind races at Josh’s reaction, completely uncaring that he had cut off what he wanted to be a serious conversation as he looks around them for whatever could have caused his interruption. “What?!”

Instead of responding, Josh darts away from Austin, headed straight for a flower stand as he barely even glances back in his eagerness. Finding his side, Austin quickly realizes exactly what had gotten Josh so excited as he picks up a bunch of daffodils, turning towards him with a lopsided grin full of nothing but love. “Your favorite, right?”

Oh my lord. How is one man so goddamn sweet? Austin’s slight frustration that had begun to grow completely melts away as Josh looks between him and the flowers, looking over each to make sure there were no imperfections or wilted petals. “It is, darlin’. You remembered?”

“Of course I did, wanted to know what flowers you liked so I can get them for you.”

Austin’s cheeks tint pink under Josh’s gaze, suddenly growing bashful. “You don’t have to…”

“I want to. No one ever get you flowers before?”

“Not that I can think of.”

“Well, I’m changing that.” Josh leaves him before he can respond, quickly making his way over to the vendor and paying for the bundle as Austin can do nothing but watch him in awe. “These are for you.” He offers him that same grin as he hands them to Austin, his cheeks tinting in the soft midday light.

“You didn’t have to… but thank you, darlin’.”

“Of course. Now, I believe we are on a mission, although I will inevitably get sidetracked. Help me stay focused?”

“Sir yes sir.” Austin offers a weak salute as best he can with the hand holding the flowers, his other hand once again in Josh’s as they set off to find the ingredients they needed for their meal.

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“So, I’m gonna be honest, most of the ingredients were originally in grams so my recipe is a conversion, and more based on how much of something feels right.”

“I bake more than cook so imma letcha take the lead for this one, sound good?”

“Mhm. Don’t worry, I’m the oldest of 4, I’m good at bossing people around.”

Austin barks out a laugh as they set in on preparing the ingredients, Josh barely sparing a glance at his recipe as he had made the dish so many times that he nearly had it committed to memory, while Austin trails behind him waiting for instruction. It doesn’t take too long for them to finish, both men serving themselves up plates before meeting at Josh’s dinner table. Josh props his head up with his hands under his chin, eyes glued to Austin as he waits for him to try the fruit of their labors.

As Austin brings the forkful of pasta to his mouth and takes the first bite, Josh’s eyes go wide, his eyebrows slightly raising as he meets his gaze. “Oh-”

“Oh???”

“This is… this is fuckin’ fantastic. Holy shit, darlin’, you weren’t kiddin’.” Austin takes another large bite, having spent so much of his day devoted to cooking that he had forgotten to eat much else.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Amazing. See, I told you.” Josh grins wide at him before setting in on his own plate, both falling into a comfortable silence as they eat. When they finish, they work together to clean up their mess; all the while, Austin’s mind circles the conversation he had tried to have with Josh earlier, knowing that their time together would come to an end soon. Just as he’s thought he found the perfect way to bring it up, Josh’s voice captures his attention from the fridge as he cleans the last pan.

“Oh my god, I completely forgot. I got us a white wine to go with the pesto pasta. I guess I was so excited to make it that I overlooked it when grabbing ingredients.”

A small frown passes over Josh’s face as Austin dries his hands and meets him, taking the bottle from him to set it on the counter. “Aw, that’s alright, darlin’. I mean, it is almost five and I don’t have any other plans for the day. I can always stay here; we can watch a movie and crack this open.”

“Really?” His face lights up at the offer, already looking around to find a wine corkscrew and glasses.

“Of course. Is Jacob home though?”

“No, he’s at Sebastian’s. Why?” A mischievous look passes over his face as he glances over at Austin, his hands pausing on their way to the wine glasses stashed in the cupboard.

“Get your mind outta the gutter, Joshua.” Swatting him lightly, he finds the corkscrew and sets in on uncorking the bottle. “I was just askin’ cause I didn’t wanna disrupt him by watchin’ somethin’ in the livin’ room if he wanted to make dinner or have Sebastian over.”

“Mhmmm, right. That’s what they all say. But yeah, Jake spends most nights at Seb’s now, so I have the place to myself a lot of the time. No complaints here, I’d rather have them subject Sebastian’s neighbors to the sound of their… fun… instead of having to hear it myself.”

As he laughs lightly, anxiety creeps into his mind as Josh pours them both a glass before handing it to him and pulling him in the direction of the living room. “By the way, uh… I know we haven’t- we haven’t had like, sex sex. Like, you know we’ve had our fun, but we haven’t… gone all the way. Is that ok? I mean we have been together for like two weeks, and I know most people our age have- have done that with their partner by that mark.”

“Of course it is. I love sex, but I don’t want to do anything until you do. No pressure, ever. I’ll wait as long as you need, baby.” He offers one reassuring squeeze to his hand as they sit down on a couch before bringing his attention to the screen. “Alright, what movie we watching?”

“You’re gonna suggest Dirty Dancin’, aren’t you?”

“You know me so well. But we don’t have to if you’d prefer something else.”

“No, no, we can watch it, darlin’. Since you bought me flowers and cooked an amazing dinner for us, it’s your night to choose.”

“You’re the best.” Josh presses a kiss to his cheek before snuggling into his side, quickly queuing up Dirty Dancing as they both get comfortable.

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An hour and 30 minutes and half a bottle of wine later, both men watch the end credits roll as they giggle through their conversation, their cheeks red and bodies warm from the alcohol in their systems. “No, we are not tryin’ the Dirty Dancin’ lift.” Austin laughs out, trying his best to keep both his and Josh’s glasses from spilling. “Maybe when we haven’t gone through half a bottle of wine in barely over an hour. I don’t wanna drop you, darlin’.”

“Who say’s I’d be the one getting lifted?”

“You cannot lift me, I’m sorry but that ain’t happenin’.”

Josh frowns at his words, seemingly genuine disappointment washing across his features as he sets his wine glass down. “Why not?”

“Because for starters, I’m 5 inches taller’n you. And I weigh more than you. And like I said, we’ve had some wine.” Austin follows suit, setting his glass down before tucking himself back into the couch with Josh’s body pressed against his.

“So, you’re drunk?”

“I am not drunk, thank you very much. Tipsy, maybe. Not drunk though. You however…”

“Woah, woah, woah! I’m not drunk either! Like you said, tipsy, not drunk.”

“Right, sure.” Austin grins down at him, letting himself take in his gorgeous features in the dim lighting, his pupils blown wide as he looks up at him. “Why does it matter if you’re drunk or not?”

“Because I want to kiss you. And I want you to know that it’s consensual on my part, despite the little bit of wine. As long as it’s the same for you.” Something Austin can’t quite distinguish lurks under Josh’s tone, his voice low and calm as he blinks up at him. Austin’s breath hitches at the clear communication, not used to having a partner be so upfront about topics such as these.

“It’s the same for me, darlin’. I want to kiss you too.” Before he can say anything more, Josh leans forward to connect their lips in a hungry, passionate kiss, drinking Austin up as if he were dying of thirst. Losing themselves in each other, Austin doesn’t realize how quickly their kiss had become a heated make out session until Josh straddles him, slightly grinding the tent in his pants into Austin’s lower stomach. Fuck. I want to, he just- he doesn’t know. He might not want to have sex right now right now. Don’t jump the gun, just wait and see what happens.

Austin’s heart rate speeds as Josh’s hands find his sides, squeezing his body through the fabric before slipping them under his shirt, his warm hands ghosting across his skin. This is fine, it’s alright. Enjoy it, see what happens. Trying to stay focused on the moment and not wanting his own thoughts to distract him from enjoying himself, Austin tries to push his worries to the back of his mind as Josh’s fingertips trace the waistband of his boxers, toying with the hem. It isn’t until he dips the fingers of his right hand down into his boxers lower, beginning to brush the hair at the very bottom of his happy trail that Austin freezes, his body taking over in his panic.

“Stop.”

At the word, Josh immediately pulls his hand back before leaning away from him to create some distance between the two. “I’m sorry.”  His face heats with shame as he moves to sit next to him hurriedly, his eyes looking everywhere but at Austin. “I should have asked, especially after our conversation earlier. I just got lost in the moment, but that’s no excuse.”

“I didn’t stop you because I don’t want to have sex with you, Josh.” Austin’s voice breaks slightly, causing Josh to tear his gaze towards him, his expression twisted with confusion.

“Then why-?”

Rip the band-aid off, Austin. Now or never. “I stopped you because I haven’t told you everything about myself, and I need to tell you before we take this any further.”

“What’s up, baby? You can tell me anything.” His eyebrows furrow in concern as he takes Austin’s hands in his own, his worry only growing as he tries to meet his eyes only to find them brimming with tears.

Austin finally meets his eyes, adrenaline coursing through his body as he takes a deep breath. “I’m trans, Josh. I’m a trans man. I wanted to tell you sooner, I was just worried. I know it’s unfair for me to spring this on you now when we’ve already been together for a bit, so if you- if you don’t want this now, us, I understand completely. Tell me to leave and I will. But I needed you to know I haven’t been puttin’ out because I don’t want to have sex with you, believe me, I do; I just- I’ve had top surgery, but not bottom, and I don’t plan to. Everythin’ you may have felt is just a packer, I just- I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“Why would I not want to be with you anymore, Austin?” Josh doesn’t even miss a beat, his tone serious and quiet as he looks at him with sadness beneath his eyes.

“Because we haven’t really talked about what you identify as. It hasn’t been important, cause you and everyone else thought I was a cis man. I was blessed with bein’ tall, havin’ a small chest and more masculine features already, and I’ve been on T for nearin’ three years, so it ain’t like it’s ‘obvious’. If you have a preference for people with penises, I need you to know that that ain’t me. So, if you do, I won’t take it personally if you’d like to end this.”

“Do you want to end this?”

Austin blinks back tears, praying that Josh would give him some sign, any sign about what he was feeling. “No.”

“Then I don’t either.”

“You don’t?”

“Of course not. Austin, I don’t care that you’re trans.” Josh catches himself, realizing what he said and quickly backtracking. “I mean, obviously I do. It’s part of your identity, it’s part of who you are. But it’s not the only thing that makes you, you. And I’m queer, I like every identity, every genitalia, doesn’t matter to me. And even if I did identify as strictly ‘gay’, that wouldn’t change a goddamn thing. You’re my boyfriend, not having a biological male penis doesn’t make you any less of a man.”

Austin’s tears escape him as he lets Josh pull him into his chest, beginning to sob into his shirt as his hand comes up to gently cradle the back of his head, the other rubbing soothing circles into his back. “Oh, baby. Thank you for trusting me with this, I know how hard it can be to come out to people that are important to you. If I may ask, why were you so nervous?” Josh’s tone is gentle, making it clear to him that he didn’t have to share if he didn’t want to.

“I was afraid’a loosin’ you. I really, really, like you, Josh. I was afraid that you wouldn’t want me if you knew, I didn’t wanna go through that pain again.”

“Again?”

Nodding slightly against his chest, Austin sits up to look at him properly, finding it hard as he inevitably trains his eyes on his hands fidgeting in his lap. “Mhm. I’ve had guys ghost me or- get angry after findin’ out. Obviously, I knew you wouldn’t get angry or anythin’ like some have, I just- wasn’t ready to risk loosin’ you. It’s a bit selfish, I should’ve told you sooner. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize to me, please.” Josh’s hands move to cup his face, gently tilting his head to make him meet his gaze as he wipes stray tears away with the pads of his thumbs. “You do not need to apologize for your identity, or who you choose to disclose that information with. Ever. I completely understand, and I’m so sorry you’ve had those experiences. I’m not going anywhere, baby. I like you, all of you, and I want all of you. Everything that comes with it, alright?”

Despite the tears still pouring down his cheeks, Austin grins wide at Josh, his fears and worries evaporating from his mind at the genuine expression of care on his face and his sincere tone. “Alright. Thank you, darlin’.”

“Of course, baby.” Josh presses a kiss to his lips, still gently cradling his face before leaning back slightly and breaking it only to pepper kisses on the corners of his lips and across the skin of his cheeks, drawing a wet laugh from Austin. “Thanks again for telling me.”

Austin looks up at him through his lashes as Josh wipes the last of his tears away, still looking at him with the kindest expression he had ever seen. “Thanks for bein’ so supportive.”

“Always. Now, what do you want to do with the rest of the night? We can watch another movie if you’d like, or go out somewhere. Whatever you feel comfortable with.”

Whatever I feel comfortable with? I mean I did- I still do want to- and now he knows and don’t seem to negatively care. “Anything?”

“Mhm, whatever you want.”

“I want you to show me just how much you want me.” Austin locks his eyes on Josh’s, seeing his pupils rapidly expand as the previous, charged energy between them returns. “All of me.”

Josh’s tongue flits out to wet his lips, his eyes dipping to Austin’s lips as his breath catches in his throat. “You sure?”

“Mhm. I did say I wanted to fuck you, didn’t I? Now that we have that conversation out of the way.”

As his hips jerk forward involuntarily, Josh tries to organize his thoughts into some response as his brain short-circuits, clearing his throat before speaking. “I believe the original statement was a little less vulgar.”

“Was it now?” Closing the distance between them, Austin brings his lips to Josh’s, one hand on his neck pulling him impossibly closer as the other slowly made its way up his thigh. Ghosting his hand over his bulge, Austin smiles against his lips as he feels Josh’s breath hitch, the faintest whimper escaping his lips as he tries to press himself up into his hand. To Josh’s dismay, Austin continues his path with his hand upwards, ignoring the whines of protest as his hand moves under his shirt to grip the soft skin of his sides. “Fancy takin’ this to the bedroom? I know Jacob ain’t here, but I’d feel bad if he walked in on somethin’; and I don’t think I could ever look anyone in the eyes again if I saw they sat on this couch after.”

As both lean back slightly, Austin opens his eyes to see Josh grinning at him, a light laugh leaving his pink, kiss-swollen lips. “That’s probably the smartest idea.” Getting up from the couch, they both grab their half-full glasses of wine as Josh eagerly leads Austin to his bedroom, closing the door behind them immediately after entering. Their hands find the other’s body the second they set their glasses down on Josh’s dresser, now empty and free to roam under each other’s shirts as Austin begins pushing Josh backwards towards his bed. Austin draws Josh’s shirt over his head before giving him one final shove, the action causing him to fall back onto the bed as he looks up at Austin, already breathless from anticipation.

He says nothing as he grins down at Josh mischievously, making sure his eyes were trained on him before he pulls his shirt off, throwing it to the side as Josh’s eyes darken. Closing the distance between them, Austin pushes Josh backwards until he’s laying on his back, slotting his leg in between his as their lips reconnect. The second Austin applies the slightest amount of downwards pressure with his thigh, Josh moans into his mouth, his hands tangling in his curls. With his lips still parted, Austin takes the opportunity to swipe his tongue across his bottom lip, his breath hitching as Josh immediately reciprocates, his own tongue snaking in between his teeth as he licks into his mouth breathlessly.

It isn’t long before Austin’s mouth leaves Josh’s, his lips ghosting across his neck and shoulder as he peppers kisses and soft bites across his skin. “What- what do you want to do?” Josh huffs the words out, as if speaking was a strain in his current state as he writhed under Austin.

“What do you mean, darlin’?”

“Like, do you- do you want to- oh fuck-” The end of his sentence transforms into a deep groan as Austin bites a sensitive spot on his neck, beginning to suck a hickey into the skin. “How do you want to fuck-? I have condoms, I’m down for whatever you’re comfortable with.”

“Well.” Austin’s breath fans across his skin as his lips slow, still placing gentle kisses to his skin between words. “The way you were shovin’ that tongue in my mouth has me thinkin’ ‘bout what it’d feel like between my legs. If you want to.”

“Fucking hell.” Josh groans the words out at his sentence, his hips bucking involuntarily against Austin’s front, only sending another groan through him. “Of fucking course I want to.”

Bringing his mouth back up to Josh’s, he grins against his lips before flipping their positions, slowly leaning back as Josh moves to position his body between his legs. As Austin’s head hits a pillow, Josh begins his descent, slowly kissing a trail down his neck and across the expanse of his collarbones, leaving a path of deep red and purple marks as he continues to his chest. I’m about ten seconds from tellin’ him to hurry his ass up and stop teasin’ me if he don’t- His train of thought completely derails as Josh sinks his teeth into the soft skin to the left of his belly button, his hand not supporting his body pressing down firmly in between his legs.

“Can I?” Austin looks down at Josh to see him gazing right back through heavy lids, his warm, ragged breath fanning across his lower stomach. As his fingers toy with the waistband of his pants and boxers, dipping below the fabric to lightly graze across his skin, Austin understands what Josh was asking.

“Mhm.” Despite himself, anxiety rushes through him as Josh draws both his jeans and boxers down his legs, watching Josh’s face for any signs of reluctance or disappointment. Josh’s jaw goes slack as he stares up at Austin, keeping steady eye contact as he brings his lips to the sensitive skin of his inner thigh and sinking his teeth into it. To ground himself, Austin brings one hand to tangle in Josh’s hair gently as the other fists the sheet below him, his breaths uneven from nerves and anticipation.

“You ok?” Austin barely hears the words, beginning to lose himself in his own mind.

“Mhm. Just nervous.”

“You don’t have to be nervous, we don’t have to keep going if you’re uncomfortable.”

“No!” Austin’s cheeks tint red at how fast the words had left his mouth, not missing the small smirk that flashes across Josh’s lips momentarily. “I want to, really. Just haven’t done this in… a while.”

“I’ll take care of you, baby. Just sit back and let me make you feel good.” Austin swears he can see stars at Josh’s low tone, his eyes hungry as his lips return to his thigh. He continues scattering kisses and bites across his thighs, slowly but surely moving lower and lower until he reaches the crease of his hip, lowering his body until he’s lying on his stomach in between his legs. “You ready?”

“Mhm.” Josh gives him a few seconds before he shifts his weight, lowering his head until he sinks forward, burying his tongue in Austin. He lets out a guttural moan as he feels Josh lick into him fervently, his grip on his hair tightening with each movement. His moans only grow louder as Josh drags his tongue upwards until it reaches his clit, swirling his tongue around him a few times before suctioning his lips around it. Austin tries to keep his hips from bucking up into him as he sets a steady pace, his tongue circling his dick as the sound of his pleasure goes straight to his own, weak moans escaping him as he presses himself against the mattress for any relief.

Josh brings his hand not gripping Austin’s thigh up to his entrance, circling it with the slightest amount of pressure, not yet pressing into him yet as he waits for some form of response. He gets it as Austin nods, his eyes screwed shut and eyebrows furrowed in his ecstasy. Wasting no time, he slowly inserts his middle finger, reveling in the sigh that left Austin as he buries himself in him. Pausing slightly to allow him to get used to the depth, he begins slowing pumping his finger in and out, curling it slightly as he searches for his G-spot. As Josh finds it, Austin’s back arches, his mouth falling open in a silent groan as the hand in Josh’s hair pulls at his roots. The sensation of it nearly pushes Josh over the edge as he weakly grinds into the mattress, his moans vibrating against Austin.

“Oh fuck-” Austin can say nothing else as his breath catches in his throat, pleasure crashing over him as his hips erratically buck forward, riding his high out. Josh’s pace remains unfaltering as he carries him through his orgasm, his neglected erection becoming painful at the sounds leaving his boyfriend’s mouth. It isn’t until Austin’s face contorts with overstimulation, his hand roughly pulling Josh away from him that he pulls his finger from him and leans back, allowing him a moment to breathe and come down as he kisses the skin of his thighs once again.

“You good?”

“Mhm, I am- I am so good, darlin’.” Austin cracks his eyes open, almost immediately ready for a second round as he takes in Josh’s appearance; his sweat slick hair, the curls at the edges of his face sticking to his skin, blown out pupils, and sweat and cum soaked lips and chin sending Austin spiraling once more despite how overstimulated he still was.

“Good.” Josh places one last kiss to his thigh before sitting up and moving back up his body, his slick lips ghosting across his skin until he reaches his mouth. The second he tastes himself on his lips, he makes up his mind, flipping their bodies quickly.

“You said you got protection, darlin’?”

“Bedside table, top drawer. You sure? You just-”

“You’re gonna find out just how high my sex drive is.” Austin grins at him before temporarily leaving him to snatch a condom from the drawer, finding his place between Josh’s legs once more as he begins working at the button of his pants. “Try and remember how high your sex drive was when you were 17 or 18; like I said, I’ve been on T for three years, so that’s about where mine’s at constantly.”

“Jesus fuck-” Austin offers no response as he pulls Josh’s pants and briefs down, his breath catching in his throat as his dick springs free, the tip red and neglected against his soft lower stomach.

Fuckin’ hell- I knew he was big, but I wasn’t expectin’ this big. Trying to stay focused, Austin rolls the condom on quickly before placing his legs on either side of Josh’s thighs, teasing the other man by wrapping his hand around the base of his dick and applying the slightest amount of pressure. Josh sits up to meet him, his hands immediately finding Austin’s hips as he raises himself up, guiding him towards his entrance. “Ready?”

“Mhm.” Austin wastes no time in sinking down onto him, their mouths falling open in unison as he slowly lowers himself until he’s buried completely in him. Neither move as they adjust to the feel of each other, their breaths fanning against the other’s lips as Austin’s hands find his shoulders, Josh’s still firmly gripping his hips.

“You good?” Austin pants the words out, needing to feel him moving inside himself but not wanting to overstimulate Josh if he needed more time.

“Mhm. Please- please move. Please fuck me.”

Fuck. Josh bites his bottom lip between his teeth as Austin raises himself almost completely off him before sinking back down in one swift motion, quickly finding and setting a pace that he knew would have both of them coming undone in minutes. As his head tilts backwards from pleasure, Josh’s eyes squeeze shut as he clamps his mouth shut to stifle a moan, only causing Austin to bring his hand up to his mouth, his thumb dragging across his lower lip. “I want to hear everything, y’understand?”

“Mhm.”

“Say it.”

“I- I understand.” Josh is true to his words as Austin experimentally grinds his hips forward, a loud moan leaving his lips as his grip tightens on the other man.

“Good boy.” Austin feels his dick twitch inside him at the words, setting his pace once more as his lips find the skin of his neck. “Such a good listener, ain’t ya?” Now his turn to bite, suck, and kiss marks into his skin, Austin memorizes each whine and groan that escapes him as he works his way up and down, his own high creeping up on him as he feels Josh’s body tense under his hands.

“Close- Almost there, baby. Just like that- Yes-”

“Cum for me.”

“No.” Josh’s eyebrows furrow as he tries to crack his eyes open, restraint twisting his features as he finds it increasingly hard to hold his orgasm back. “Want you to cum with me.” Austin doesn’t even have time to argue as his hand lowers, beginning to gently rub circles around his clit with his index and middle finger.

Austin’s forehead comes to rest against Josh’s as his eyes close, his senses bombarded with his second orgasm of the night. “Fuck. Right there-” It isn’t long after that he begins to feel that familiar twitch in his thighs and lower abdomen, his muscles tensing before pleasure crashes over him, seeing nothing but a blinding white light as he rides through his orgasm.

The feeling of Austin tensing around his dick sends Josh into his own high, trying to keep his pace on his clit steady as they peak together. They carry each other through their climaxes until uncomfortable overstimulation replaces their pleasure, both men hissing at the contact as Austin quickly raises himself off Josh, collapsing onto the bed beside him.

Josh falls backwards to lay on the bed completely, finding himself wrapped in Austin’s arms and pulled snug against his chest almost immediately. They allow themselves to lie like this for a few moments, not wanting to leave the other by getting up. Finally, they give in to the feeling of needing to clean up, both men quickly realizing just how sweaty their activities had made them as they peel themselves from the other and head to Josh’s bathroom together.

“Want to go smoke and finish our wine in the glasses on the porch?” Josh’s voice is casual and light despite the fact that he had asked the question while discarding their used condom, both men completely naked in the small space as they set in on the bare minimum of cleaning up.

Is this how casual and communicative all people are after or during sex? “Smoke what? And maybe, I know it ain’t too hot or cold out, but I don’t feel like getting’ dressed again and I don’t think your neighbors would appreciate it if we went commando.”

“Weed, cigarette for me. And I have a robe you can borrow, I might have another somewhere I can use, but I’m not sure.” Closing the bathroom door slightly, Josh pulls a silk robe off the hook attached to the back of the door, handing the dark blue fabric scattered with stars to him before making his way back into his room and towards his closet.

“If you can’t find your other one, I can just slip on a t-shirt and some boxers, it’s no biggie.” Despite his reluctance, he puts the robe on, knowing that no matter what, Josh would refuse to take it back. Instead of responding, Josh snorts as he pulls out a massive pile of bright pink silk and faux fur from his closet, unfolding it to reveal a long, billowing robe, the sleeves cascading nearly to the floor as he slips it on with a grin.

“Oh. My. God. You look like your old, rich husband just died under mysterious circumstances; and you definitely poisoned him.” Josh barks out a laugh as he retrieves the wine glasses, his robe ghosting across the floor and flowing behind him like a cape as he moves around the room. “Why the hell do you have that?”

“Went all out on a Halloween costume last year, I forgot about it till now to be honest.” He hands him the glasses as he finds a lighter, a box of cigarettes, and a joint, moving all three items to one hand as he takes his glass back. “What, do you not like it?” Glancing back at him with a smile, they move through the house together, making their way towards the back door in the dim light of the dying summer day.

“No, no, I love it. It suits you, honestly. I just wasn’t expectin’ it, that’s all.” They say nothing more as they sit down on the comfortable couch on the patio, Josh turning on the surrounding fairy lights strung along the walls and railings before sitting as close to Austin as he can. Sitting in comfortable silence, they sip their wine and Josh lights a cigarette after a few minutes, finishing it just as he drains the remainder of his wine glass. Noticing Austin’s glass had been emptied too, he retrieves the joint, lighting it carefully to ensure an even burn before taking a long drag.

He holds it out to Austin, unashamed of how his eyes stayed glued to the other man’s lips as they brush his fingertips, his heartbeat faltering at the contact. They get through half the joint before Austin finally breaks the silence, the weed loosening his lips as he replays the last hour or so of his life.

“Thanks again for bein’ so supportive. I don’t mean to make you feel like I didn’t trust you with knowin’, or that I thought you’d react negatively. That ain’t it, I swear. I’ve just had too many negative experiences with other guys that I just- I just expect guys won’t want me like they did before findin’ out. And I couldn’t shake that, even though I knew that you wouldn’t do that.”

“Don’t worry, baby, I know. I don’t take it personally, and I’m not upset. Like I said, it’s not important in terms of how it might affect our relationship or sex life. It doesn’t change how I feel for you, or how much I want you. I fully support you and am so grateful that you’re letting me see every beautiful part of you.”

Tears come to Austin’s eyes at his boyfriend’s words, his heart soaring at the level of support and what he could only describe as love that Josh had shown him. “Thank you, darlin’. Thank you for acceptin’ all of me.”

“Always and forever, Austin. Never forget it.”

--------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Since I decided that Austin would become a core OC, not just a background character briefly mentioned in Save a Horse, he has been very special to my trans, queer friends and I. I have woven in our experiences and who we are into him; in a way, he is a collection and reflection of myself and the people I love most. It wasn’t until very recently that I realized we had always perceived him as a trans man, even though it was never explicitly stated. I chose to write this so that we/I can share this part of him with you all. As it was a smut fic, I chose to not put “trans M receiving” or anything denoting that part of his identity into the warnings (besides warnings of certain discussions as I recognize it may be a sensitive topic for other trans people) and will continue to do the same in the future. Trans gay sex is gay sex, it should be considered no different than gay smut between two cis men.  

A/N pt 2: normalize👏healthy👏communication👏during👏sex👏

taglist: @gretnavannfleet @aioba1503-sdm @sanguinebats @fuckyoutommie

[the-sirens-asks]

Huh. You used to be in a band, right?

What happened to that band?

— @sebastians-asks

Hey, Seb. Good t’ see ya ‘round ‘ere. I was in a band back in uni. This was the time when nu-metal was on the rise, so my friends and I started a band called “Star Chasing”!

I was the lead singer, my friend was the bassist, another friend was the guitarist, and my girl back then was the drummer. We’d play gigs at local bars and restaurants, open mic nights, ‘n at garage parties. Those years were so memorable.

When graduation season rolled around, we decided t’ call it quits since we’d be on our own paths adultin’ in the world. But, we couldn’t say goodbye without makin’ our final appearance at the annual Rocker’s Bash. We’d go up against several rock bands across the city fer a hefty cash prize, but I was more in it so I’d kickstart my dream career as a musician.

But uh…um…my girl cheated on me with our guitarist. What’s worse was that she turned the whole situation ‘round ‘n tellin’ my friends I manipulated her to doin’ some bad things ‘n that’s why she cheated.

‘N everyone sided with her even if that wasn’t true. My friend couldn’t even back me up ‘cuz he was too afraid to say shit. I quit the band a day before Rocker’s Bash, ‘n everyone followed suit.

I know that was years ago, but… I still have trouble trustin’ people no matter how close they are. I feel bad sometimes, I just can’t help it, y’know?

But hey. I got you, Sam, ‘n a bunch o’ other people in town who like me fer who I am. ‘N I thank y’all for bein’ so nice to me every time. I hope one day I can really show my gratitude more.

[yakultii]

it’s that time of the day agaaaaiinnnn …. when I woke up this morning (or should I say afternoon bc I didn’t go to sleep til like 5am again rip) I thought today was gonna be so rough BUT I went through the motions and made some moves to improve it (I’m getting very good at this now! or maybe I always was and never really recognised it until now, allowing me to now feel good about it) and the afternoon was a lot better than expected! It was so exhausting I felt like I was physically dying but I spent hrs cleaning up so now if someone saw into my apartment it just looks a normal amount of messy rather than time to be institutionalised type vibe (no exaggeration) and then I made heaps more protein icecream and then I was so exhausted I wanted to lie in my bed forever but I also wanted to get some fresh air on a walk but I told myself I could only go for my walk IF I cooked them god damn burritos first(knowing I’d be both mentally and physically exhausted by the time I got back and put it off again….. and I did it!!!!!!! It didn’t take long at all which I knew all along but sometimes my mind can’t comprehend that until I actually do it ugh. Then I FaceTimed my mum while I went for a walk but on the way home I walked past them filming the news live cos some really tragic events occurred on my road which is so sad.. and then I got home and learned I have the heart rate variability of a 75yro at 24 so that’s super duper fun but we all knew my body was cooked and imma try do everything in my power to increase that :,) ALSO before I went on my walk I saw the new sign my neighbour put up (as u will see in a prev post) and it made me so happy :))) I’m so glad I made the card heheh making it and giving it brought me so much joy - I think maybe the reason my life feels so empty is because I haven’t been doing nice things for people(idk?) like how can I expect the universe be kind to me when I haven’t actively been going out of my way to be kind lately (I used to all the time but now I don’t have much human contact so that’s kinda why it’s been limited)… I was running at parkrun on Saturday mornings bit before I started getting too physically exhausted to even do that but this has got me thinking maybe I should just go there and volunteer until I’m feeling physically better?? It really can’t hurt for me to learn how to be around people again just one morning a week (just gotta fix my sleep schedule over the next few days first)… anyways I’ll get back to you on the progress w that one! additionally I am super grateful for my hot shower and even more so for the bomb ass burritos I just ate for dinner! I also achieved most my goals from yesterday of drink water and make burrito but not get sleep rip. My goals for tomorrow are 1. get to SLEEP before 3am (I mean that’s kinda today,kinda tomorrowlol) 2. eat a little more than I did today 3. complete readings/questions for at least 1 of my uni classes for next week(I’ve barely done any readings the entirety of my degree and still managed mostly 90s but I’m doin a lil experiment to see what happens when I do LOOL also now I only do so, no more philos, so that readings are gonna be a lot more manageable/I may as well try :) I hope you’re all having a lovely day today and that your tomorrow is even better!

[idkwhatimdoingbutslay]

Hey just wanted to pop in and wish you a belated HAPPY NEW YEAR, even though you had some bad luck with chapter 16 of "dear, hello..." to start. (I'm sorry to see that happened!!) We shake it off and run it back, babeyyy! Also, I'm VERY excited to see chapter 16 tomorrow and to see the list of stories you have planned. 😍😍 Oh, since this is an "ask" and not a fangirl moment: How ya doin? Any new years resolutions you want to share? Take care of yourself, and have a lovely weeeek!! 🤗🤙

AHH omg thanks so much anony-mony !!!!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU TOO! Hope 2024 is already going amazing‼️‼️

Thanks so much for the well wishes and everything 😭. It was most definitely a struggle to see a bunch of my work gone but I think I redid it pretty well! We’re absolutely shaking it off and moving forward, it’s all good 💋

I’m also veryyyy excited for you to see chapter 16!!!! I def think you’re gonna love it because……. Just cause 🤭

Once dear, hello is finished I def plan on getting some more stories out. I have even… been thinking of a dear, hello post Uni sequel but I won’t say or promise too much LMAO. That’s not all I’ve been thinking writing tho but no more yapping 🏃🏾‍♀️🤧

ANYWAY: I’m doing good! Pretty solid actually. No resolutions because I’m pretty awesome, BUT MAYBE just make more time for art and personal writing. Also, take care of yourself too!!!! Hope your week is wonderful‼️‼️‼️

[koyunsoncizeri]

Me, winning a comics competition among thousands of people who applied, get the yes of 15 jury members 2 of which is The Comics Industry Big Mens™ only to find out everyone has an artbackground (not bad) but they are extremely arrogant and elitist (bad),

Just a small rant andd Uuuhh msg to other people n shid

So we are talking about why we chose comics, what are our insporations etc. And i told them "i didnt have an art bg, neither was I supported. I was in love with Golden era American animation, but since it was only me and only me, comics seemed lot more doable. And i love it even more than any other medium now" the teacher is smiling all is good.

But then one guy tells ME, (who was constantly told to "drop it, grow up", who had to go to an extremely demanding uni to study another major, and filled her free time drawing until i fcked up my tendons,) "you could have done it if you wanted / dedicated your time" with the most arrogant vibe. So i shut him tf up by saying "ur studying animation, that is what you are supposed to do and you do that. I studied translation. It wasnt the only thing that needed my energy and time" .....sigh.

And after that it got heated , and i found out the CEO (?) Of this thing was also impressed by the schools they attended rather that their own work. 🤡 Talked a good 15 mins about how good their schools are and how amazing teacher they had.

You know what that left a mf sour taste in my mouth.

Like if it was old me, i would have cried right there. Like stop gatekeeping, stop putting people down. You are speajing from a privilaged position, aint no middle class family send their kids to art school unless they re really supportive or they re rich.

....... anyway. Tis for everyone (and my little self) who doin arts with no art degree, who doin arts with no support from their parents or friends, who were laughed at cuz of their interests. (Goes for any creatives really)

You good my little dude. You are going to places. You will. You dont need no paper to tell ya u know how to draw n shit. Most of those teachers in art schools dont even know human anatomy dawg. You learn by yourself, everyone is their own teacher. You will find your style lot more easier and faster than everyone, cuz it be yours from the beginning, aint some teachers' . You are good dawg. Tou will be aight.

Also missing my teacher so much,,,,..who learned how to draw in prison and shiDDed on art schools. I miss you so much man. Thank ya for looking at my shid drawings and see their potential. If hadnt, i wouldnt be able to.

[felassan]

I'm havin a 'clear out my drafts' day so heres a wee tagmeme fill:

I was tagged a while back by @thebookworm0001, thanku :) (its edited somewhat)

Are you named after anyone? a figure from myth

Do you have kids? nope

What’s the first thing you notice about people? like what their vibe is ig. its hard to articulate what that is exactly, but their vibe

Any special talents? bird and plant ID. like i can show u where to find and how to make e.g. nice free tea thats good for ur health. and on the way tell u what birds we are hearing and seeing as we wander ◕‿◕ (hhh i also wanna say DA lore but like everyone here is good at that !)

Where were you born? scotland 💙

What are your hobbies? gaming, gaming news, DA/ME, fantasy & sci-fi generally, foraging, birding and anything to do with animals and the natural world rly, queer stuff, folklore & the like, rats, goin to old and ancient places, [scot]politics irl (insofar as politics can be a hobby.. hobby is the wrong word.. but it does take up a lot of free time. u know). also lately I've been doin random classes and self-study of subjects towards random lil qualifications n stuff but like. for fun¿?¿

Have you any pets? not at the moment but I'm a rat fancier/enthusiast and usually keep rescue rats

What sports do you play/have played? cycling/biking, field hockey

How tall are you? bout 5 ft 6

Favorite subject[s] in school? biology, environmental science/studies, art, creative writing. the first 2 i then did at college/uni ◕‿◕

Dream job? actually idk about the idea itself of a "dream job". i enjoy my current job, it helps society, and i am happy and vibin generally which is what matters most i think ◕‿◕

not tagging anyone but if you see this and feel like it, pls do it and tag me so i can see!!

[hoonvrs]

Hey saint watchu doin 😊

Honestly had a really bad day today and Ur the only person I can talk to rn. Idk what's up with ppl forcing me to do things I don't like and telling me to stop doing things I love doing. As if whatever I wanna do is always wrong. My school has restricted me to do any crochet in the campus EVEN THOUGH I don't interrupt nor am I distracted during the classes. My mum has told me to solely focus on studies and do crochet in the holidays. BUT now they want me to do extracurriculars. Maybe I'm in the wrong but I have no interest in the acts of singing, dancing, art and other cultural activities. But I have to do them because I do nothing at home. Like I don't take extra classes for playing instruments, or go to other places for tutoring, nor do I learn anything involving self defense, dancing, singing, reciting. I don't even like sports. I just don't like these activities. But I have to do them and I'm being forced because they're 'good for me' and 'good for my future'. Which I get it's completely fine. But is crochet not? Infact I wanted to do a specific activity and my friend wanted to do photography. But since I chose that activity, she has to too because she won't do photography alone. And then she said it's my fault but when I said that I could switch for the sake of her not blaming it on me for the rest of the semester, she said no. I can't deny anything anymore. When they ask me if I want to do something and I say no, they ask why and I just say that I don't want to. But apparently that isn't a valid reason to say no. I would say all of this to my mum but she's friends with my friends mums and would try taking to them about it but I don't want the others knowing. Ill be honest saint you were the first person I could think of because no one else would just listen to me and not go tell someone else or start asking questions. I don't have anyone to talk to anymore. I just wish things were like before when in was like five and I wasn't allowed to meet my friends outside of school. When our parents weren't friends to the point they would steal away the only day my mum had a holiday I could spend time with her on. I wish I had someone to talk to. Now all I can do is look in the mirror, cry, and talk to myself. Saint you don't understand how much talking to u like this is helping me. We don't even know eachother personally but at least I can talk to you freely without any judgement. I just wanna live my life. I've never had a moment in life where I felt free since I was 5. I miss freedom.

-🌜(rant again 😭)

i can’t understand personally but i can definitely feel for you cause i have a friend in the exact same situation and honestly fuck them for not letting you do what you want in your own life, esp ur school cause in what world do they completely nan you from crocheting in school likes it’s really none of their business. honestly the advice i can give ( if you even want any ) is to not do it. nothing teaches a parent a lesson unless their kids rebel cause it honestly so much easier to ask for forgiveness then for permission, and they’ll see in the future all of that was so useless.

with your friend pls try and stand up for yourself, coming from someone who’s literally ignored her own cousins cause they were being bitchy it’ll be better to avoid and ignore her then to have to put up with her attitude. tell her no one told her to ditch photography and that she should learn some independence or she won’t get too far in life, and she might get offended but that’s her problem not yours.

i’m happy that you feel safe enough with me to share this but i’m so upset that you have to go through this, praying it’ll be js an emotional memory when you’re a little bit older with more independence cause parents will learn to give their kids freedom once they’ve hit an age where they can’t control them ( usually uni )

don’t let anyone try to talk you out of what you love or talk you down into staying in a toxic friendship just because you’re ‘parents are close’ or ‘you’ve known each other for so long’ they’re js manipulating you into wasting your energy and effort on stupid friendships and ik it’s easier said then done but you’ll feel so much better without that burden

[paradiqms]

JESUS IS BACK !!! paradiqms serving cunty and authenticity what's new? 🙄

omg how i missed u 💔 how you doin? how was your week? your month? hope u been doin well ❤️‍🩹

and i just saw the yunho smau and ugh *chef kiss* THE PLOT IS JUST ON POINT HIHIHIHI i love me some enemies to lovers with the crack funny rivality !

i've been laughing at the ratinies joke for the past 5 minutes it just caught me off guard 😭 yuuta and uta friendship dynamic is ALSO on point they're both pain in the ass and both crackheads with malefic ideas in their silly heads ! also i live to see cheol being the only functional braincell of the band 💔 u slayed again

woosan being into the same conspiracy theories about who's living in whose walls is also so funny . it's the first chapter but im already having so much fun 😋 you catch all the atinytwt jokes real good when you mentioned yunho's feet kink 😋🙈 i see you're going to feed us high quality content and i can't wait to hype it all !

hope u doin great and take your time to write !! im happy you're back !!

*real pic of me after getting the notification*

KSKFKD U DON'T UNDERSTAND I ACTUALLY LOVE U SM 💔💔 i've been doing good lately!! uni is beating my ass tho but what's new... I HOPE YOU'VE BEEN DOING WONDERFUL THOUGH <333

AAAA PLS the smau idea has been haunting me for so long 😭 im so happy you like it!!!!! seungcheol is about to grow white hair bc of yuta and uta fr..... making atinytwt jokes is so fun cuz i cackle at them all the time too. also yunho can't hide anything from us, we know his feet kink is real 🤺

THE REACTION PIC MADE ME LAUGH SO LOUD THO I CAMTT 😭😭 GONNA KEEP IT AND FRAME IT ON MY WALL

[heeliopheelia]

Bestie how you doin? You good now? Did the sick cuddles work?!!

I just saw your asks about Gege and Geto. And FOR REAL GEGE DESERVES TO BE LOCKED UP IN MY BASEMENT AND STAY THERE FOREVER. Geto is so fucking tiny I love him so pathetically.

Also also also I did an experiment at the aquarium I'm working at where I showed some pictures of k-pop idols to some friendly octopus for science of course (we had an assignment where we had to interact and note down reactions of some different fishies). AND IM TELLING YOU A FEMALE OCTOPUS LEGIT FREAKED OUT WHEN I SHOWED HER A PICTURE OF JAY. And it was the blessed cursed era Jay! I was like 'relatable'. This one male octopus, the oldest one we have, flapped his arms around when I showed his Heeseung, yk that one concert where bitch was LITERALLY poisoning us with purple hair? Yep. The baby octopus reacted well when I showed them Sunoo and Niki, in the future perfect era, which was like 'ok now that's cool.'

Sigh. I relate to these octopi so well.

Hi babe!! I'm doing well... fine ig 🤡😩 My loser bf had classes and work today so he's gonna drop by in two hours or so 👎 Geto would never leave me alone in such state fr fr

BUT THE OCTOPI (? is that correct?) EXPERIMENT SOUNDS SO CUTE TF 😭🥺 My boring uni could never 😒

How are you tho? Ur girly's doing fine? 😚

[ffsg0jo]

This is random af butttt

I just went thru ur blog cos well ur one of my comfort ppl tbh and im havin this headache right?

And whn incame to my moodboard my headache just?went?away?

Maybe its cos of the colour blue but either way

Just wanted to tell you😅

Hope youre doin well

Byeee bestieeee💙💙

-jaya

WHAT YOURE JOKING RIGHT???? THATS THE BIGGEST FUCKING COMPLIMENT EVER, ESPECIALLY SINCE MY BLOG IS SO FUCKING DRYY, JAYA YOU'RE THE BEST I STG

also that is so cool, it could actually be because of the blue, because its a calming colour. we should conduct an experiment testing pain levels and how they change when the participant sees different colours. i feel like red would intensify it and blue would calm it down a little bit. or there could be zero correlation as well lmaoo

thank you for telling me that, that's honestly really cool and interesting. i need to do an experiment for uni (it's 3 years away lmao) and that's got my brain going :))

i hope you're having a wonderful day and hope youre doing well too <33