#how not to lose weight 😂

[sweptawaybyadhd]

Anti-Keto Cookies, 😂 Peanut butter cookies topped with a milk chocolate Hershey's Kiss. Beloved wife makes these cookies for the students at the fancy private boys' school where she teaches. The boys, being boys, call them "nipple cookies," lol.

These are great cookies 🍪, but you could almost say they are the "anti-keto cookie." But after 3 or 4 years on this diet, my cravings for sugar have subsided pretty much.

[lucygraysboy]

it’s now or never, billy tells himself, rolling onto his side as his forearms begin to go numb. he either cuts all ties to his past and lucy gray now or she’ll keep coming back, doing what she’s done earlier today, bombarding his phone with strange messages that feel more like invisible knives, cutting into his heart, haunting him. he can’t say what’s possessed him to type all those cold, cruel words when he could have just blocked her number, but there’s no taking them back now, not when she’s already viewed them. awaiting her response, he contemplates his choices and can’t say that he’s proud of them, but once again reassures himself that it had to be done. she doesn’t want him. she’s been playing mind games with him, giving him nothing but mixed signals basically ever since they both hit puberty. he can’t be hung up on her, waste away his life because she’s not done messing with his heart just yet. and so he doesn’t think about the consequences of his actions, about how his texts might affect his childhood sweetheart the other, because he won’t be there to pick up the pieces of her broken heart or witness the aftermath first-hand. 

when his phone lights up again, he presses play almost automatically. it’s like ripping off the band-aid. he knows there’s nothing pleasant awaiting him, quite the opposite, but postponing this moment won’t make it hurt any less. tears well up in his pale blue eyes the second lucy gray’s voice fills the air, part of him feeling like she’s right beside him or talking to him from the other room, his chest constricting violently. he’s dead to her. good. but then why doesn’t it feel good? isn’t this what he’s wanted this whole time? as more words keep pouring out, he realizes that he’s not the only one crying, that she sounds so different because she must be fighting back tears. it hits him at once, all the memories of her bambi eyes, so big and innocent, glistening with sadness. when she begins to belittle her looks, he sits up and cradles his head in his hands, fingers sinking into his dark curls, pulling, tugging until his scalp’s gone numb. none of this is true. not a single word. he wants to scream and cry and get on the first plane back home just to beg her for forgiveness, but… he can’t turn back now. he’s made his bed, now he has to lie in it. 

by the time she gets to the part about their mothers, how his own would be ashamed of him, how he doesn’t have the right to insult hers, he’s overcome with fear and heartbreak and anger, and barely listening. he throws his phone at the wall out of sheer helplessness, her voice stopping abruptly mid-sentence. he will not remember much from this moment in the morning, his emotions too strong, his grief all-consuming — he’d felt this way before only once when he learned about his mother’s death. now it’s lucy gray. she’s the one passing away and he can’t save her… or maybe he’s the one holding the knife that’s cutting her heart out. either way, the pain of losing her, really losing her, is so great that even his lungs constrict, and suddenly it seems he’ll never be able to breathe again. he races to the bathroom and doesn’t even lock the door, climbing into the shower with his underwear still on. originally, he only intends to cry, hugging his knees to his chest and rocking back and forth, letting the cold water wash away his tears, but then he spots the scissors just sitting there on the counter. he crawls out and picks them up, and soon his dark curls are falling into the sink, one ringlet after another as he begins to chop off his hair. billy’s dead. he’s dead to her. and she’s always loved his locks so… it somehow makes sense. the water keeps running, muffling out any desolate sounds that might leave his mouth. he uses the razor to shave off what’s left of his beautiful hair, and then, once he’s exhausted both physically and emotionally, his body finally sinks to the floor and somehow more tears fill his eyes… he stays on the bathroom floor until charlie finds him in the morning.

she expected some smart ass reply again, but not another shock. not another knife to her chest. ripping out what's measly left of her heart. for a moment she just continued to stare at the screen like it wasn't real– this was just a nightmare she'd wake up from, her heart lurching, panging, feeling the actual painful vibrations those detrimental words took a toll on her beat against her ribcage. forget typing, she pressed voice record,

‘i dont know but you’ve gone too far now billy bonney, you’re dead to me now’ she hiccuped, her throat constricting, ‘like you're one to attack my looks. don't get so high above your raisin'. like you haven’t always been that dorky lil boy in school? but you know what,’ she bit her lower lip to keep it from wobbling, sucking in a breath, ‘i always thought you were the most handsome one there.’ her nose sniffed, ‘not anymore... not ever.' voice cracking, a hard cry tearing from her throat. wailing as she clutched her shirt at the hurt that caused, 'you’re the ugliest person on the inside. usin' me like an object, while thinkin' i'm ugly. maybe i am...but you got nothin' but the devil in you for sayin' shit like that to me. and yeah, your mother WOULD be a damn shamed of you at what you've turned into.' it's not an attack, it's the truth. she knows his mother as well as he does, it wasn't like she didn't spend endless days with her too. lucy gray loved his mama as much as he did, her cries become even more out of control because she can't just go over and tell her how he's acting anymore. can't just go over and tell her to help her make this better.

because she's gone, neither of them have her anymore. he's selfish even more if he thinks she didn't see her as her second mom she could confide in. a mom she mourns everyday, too. 'and don't call MY mama names, she'd be even more ashamed of you,' she gritted her teeth in a streak of anger, jabbing the bed with her finger, 'she's been nothin' but KIND to you all these years and loved you like her own ALL these years. you can hate me all you want to cause jesse told you to, but she did nothin' to you. but it don't fuckin' matter anyway,' chest heaving, coughing up the words her throat was so terribly tight as the tears continued to explode out of her eyes, 'you're dead to me, billy bonney.' she hit stop on the voice record then sent. DEAD. he was dead to her as she finished screaming and crying into the mattress. she might as well hit block on his contact number because she didn't want to provoke anymore evil things he might say to her, but she couldn't dare move right now, not when she could do nothing but wear herself exhausted with the violent emotions he'd turned over in her head all from one line.

[dollgxtz]

I gotta know when you’re posting the Zayne CNC fic??? I’ve been checking your blog multiple times a day for it!

But realistically, no pressure 😂 I know writing is hard, and I can wait, lol. It’s worth the wait. I just want to show support for you and your craft. ❤️

Also, I love your yandere!Sylus fic! I’m only on chapter four and I see so many asks about it and I have to physically stop myself from spoiling it for myself, lmao. I’m so excited to read more! Your writing and your tics are a highlight of my day. 😊🥰

Edge Of Control

Word Count: 6.2k

Tags: zayne x fem!reader, cnc, cutting, tw slight blood, scalpel play, choking, biting, degradation, blowjob, degrading names, pet names like darling, pain play, home invasion roleplay, primal play, aftercare in the end

AN: Hi everyone! I know this was a LONG awaited fic but I wanted it to be absolutely perfect for my second husband ^0^. Also ty anon for the very sweet words! I hope this fic makes up for the amount of time you had to wait!!!

It was well past midnight, and the house felt eerily quiet without him. You lay on the couch, wearing nothing but a pair of Zayne’s boxers, the soft fabric a small comfort in his absence. A half-empty bottle of wine sat forgotten on the floor beside you, each sip doing little to calm the restless energy humming beneath your skin. The TV flickered, casting shadows across the room as you absentmindedly flicked through the channels, though nothing could hold your attention.

Your mind kept wandering back to Zayne, a dull ache settling in your chest. He was on another one of those grueling shifts—long hours with no word, no way to reach out to him. The pit of anxiety in your stomach tightened. You didn’t know exactly what his job as a surgeon demanded of him, but you could see it weighing on him more and more. His face had grown tired, the usual sparkle in his eyes dulled by exhaustion. You noticed the way his shoulders remained stiff, tension knotting in his body like a rope pulled too tight, barely holding it together.

Every time he came home like this, you saw it—the frustration simmering just beneath the surface. His body brimming with pent-up energy, adrenaline coursing through his veins with no way to let go. He was so tightly wound, like he was carrying the weight of a world you couldn’t fully understand. And every time you saw him like that, it broke something inside you. You wanted to help him. You wanted to be the one to take that edge off, to give him the release he so desperately needed but would never ask for.

You remembered the last time he came home with that storm in his eyes. Desperation had driven you to plead with him, to offer yourself as an outlet for all that tension, that frustration. You had begged him, your voice trembling, to let go, to take what he needed from you. But he refused. The worry in his eyes had cut deep, his voice firm but laced with guilt as he told you he didn’t want to hurt you.

That memory lingered now, thick in your chest. He was always so controlled, so careful. You knew he loved you, but there was a part of him that he kept locked away, too afraid to unleash it. But you wanted it—you craved it. You wanted him to feel safe enough to lose that control with you, to trust that you could handle it. That you wanted to handle it. But no matter how much you tried to reach him, he kept that wall up, afraid of what might happen if he let himself go.

You took another slow sip of wine, feeling the warmth of it spread through your chest, slightly loosening the anxious knot that had taken residence in your stomach. You always drank more when he was away—needed it, really. It dulled the sharp edges of worry that kept you up at night, made sleep feel a little less impossible. Without him beside you, the house felt too empty, and your mind raced with thoughts you couldn’t control.

Your eyes drifted shut, and the thought crossed your mind again—he could hurt you, if he wanted to. God, he was strong enough. His hands, so skilled and sure in the operating room, could easily push you beyond your limits if he ever let himself go. He knew the human body better than anyone; he understood exactly where and how to apply pressure, how to control every reaction. And then there was the scalpel—his precision tool of choice. He was so adept with it, using it in ways you’d never imagined.

You remembered the first time he’d worked it into one of your nights together, after you had begged him to try something more daring, something that would leave you breathless. He had been hesitant at first, but the results... God, the results. The thrill of that sharp edge glinting in the dim light, the cold metal kissing your skin before it pressed just enough to break the surface. You shivered as the memory washed over you, your body tingling with the vivid recollection.

The pain had been brief, but it was the anticipation, the unspoken threat, that had driven you wild. You could still feel it—the delicate line of fire it had traced across your shoulder, a stinging reminder of his control. And then the blade had hovered at your throat, a silent promise lingering in the air between you, making your pulse race and your breath catch in your throat. In that moment, you had never felt more alive, more his.

Your hand had barely slipped down to your heat when the sharp trill of your phone cut through the quiet. Heart pounding, you snatched it up, the suddenness of it snapping you out of your haze.

“Hello?” you answered, your voice a little breathless, still tangled in the memory of him.

“Is that offer still on the table?” Zayne’s voice poured through the speaker, low and worn, with that familiar undercurrent of exhaustion. But there was something else this time—something darker. His words dripped with a kind of danger, smooth and sweet like black honey, making your stomach flip.

You swallowed hard, a spark igniting low in your belly. “Uh, depends which one,” you managed, trying to play it cool as you sat up, bringing the wine bottle to your lips for another sip. Your heart was racing, anticipation thrumming under your skin.

“The one where I use you.”

The words hit you like a jolt of electricity, sending a thrill straight to your core. The raw need in his voice was unmistakable, and it struck every nerve you had. You faltered for a moment, caught off guard by the intensity of your own reaction. You tried to cover the sudden loss of words with another drink, the wine sliding down your throat as you let the tension stretch between you.

One more sip—just one more for courage. Then, finally, you answered, your voice steadier than you felt.

“Yes.”

“Is the wine good, darling?”

The question hung in the air, and your heart skipped a beat. “What?” you murmured, glancing around the dark living room. The flicker of the TV had left your eyes hazy, still not fully adjusted to the shadows creeping through the room. How did he know you’d been drinking wine?

Your breath caught as an icy chill swept through the house, raising goosebumps on your skin. Instinctively, your gaze darted to the front door, and your stomach dropped. It was wide open, swaying slightly as a gust of wind pushed against it.

You hadn’t heard a thing. Not the lock turning, not the door creaking. Nothing.

How had he gotten in without you noticing?

You stared at the door, frozen in place, watching as it swung shut on its own, the soft click of the latch echoing through the quiet. A chill ran down your spine as the realization hit—you hadn’t heard him enter on purpose. He wanted you to know he’d slipped in unnoticed, that he’d been watching you this whole time. Your mind spun with the thought: How long had he been there?

The phone slipped from your grasp, and you barely registered the sharp whine of the line going dead, drowned out by the thundering pulse of your heartbeat in your ears.

The soft but deliberate sound of shoes against the ceramic floor snapped you back into focus. Your senses sharpened, instincts kicking in. He was coming closer—fast.

In the low, flickering light of the TV, you saw him emerge from the shadows. Long strides brought him swiftly across the room, his form cutting through the dim light with an air of purpose. His form caught the harsh glow—the broad shoulders of his body, the sharp angles of his face—only partially revealed, but enough to make your breath hitch.

Then, without warning, the TV blinked out, plunging the room into complete darkness. The sudden silence was deafening. The sound of his footsteps, which had been closing in on you, vanished as if he’d disappeared into the night itself.

But you knew better.

He was there, somewhere in the blackness, waiting for you to realize it. The tension in the air was thick, every hair on your body standing on end as you strained to hear the slightest movement, feel the faintest brush of his presence.

You held your breath, every muscle in your body coiled tight. The tension crackled in the dark, your senses heightened by the weight of his silent presence.

Suddenly, the TV blared a sharp noise from the movie, flooding the room with light for just a second. And there he was, Zayne, only a few feet away—moving like a shadow, so silently it made your skin crawl. His face was bathed in the cold glow, and the way the light played off his sharp features made him look almost predatory. His expression was intense, dark, and unreadable, as if he was walking a line between control and something much more dangerous.

Your brain screamed danger. Fight or flight surged through your veins, heart hammering against your ribcage as self-preservation took over. Without thinking, your hand tightened around the neck of the wine bottle, the glass cool and smooth in your grip. Before you could second-guess it, you raised it high above your head and hurled it straight at him, instinct driving your every move.

But then—he catches it. Effortlessly. The bottle freezes mid-air, his hand snapping up to grab it as if it were nothing more than a tossed pillow. He doesn’t flinch. His stride doesn’t break. His hazel green eyes, burning with that same dangerous intensity, never leave yours for even a second. The best defense you could muster didn’t even make him blink.

Calmly, as though the act hadn’t fazed him at all, he places the bottle on the side table, his gaze still locked on you. The silence between you feels deafening as he closes the distance, his steps slow but deliberate.

Panic shot through you like a wild animal, adrenaline making your limbs tremble. But something else flared right alongside it—something that sent a pulse of heat straight to your core. It was fear, raw and visceral, but it was tangled up with desire, twisted into something you couldn’t quite understand but craved all the same.

You held your breath, every muscle in your body coiled tight. The tension crackled in the dark, your senses heightened by the weight of his silent presence.

Like prey trapped in the gaze of a predator, you couldn’t move.

Couldn’t look away.

And you almost didn’t want to.

You whip around, adrenaline taking over, and try to run—but you barely make it a few steps before it’s too late. You don’t even hear him behind you. The silence is terrifying, disorienting. Then, out of nowhere, his hand clamps around your elbow, and a startled shriek escapes your lips, cut off as he uses your momentum against you, spinning you sharply into the wall.

Your back collides with it hard, knocking the breath from your lungs. A whimper slips out, unbidden, from the shock of the impact. Before you can recover, Zayne’s voice, low and commanding, hisses in your ear.

“Don’t fight it,” he growls, the words sharp like a promise. “You asked for this.”

Panic surges through your body, instinct screaming at you to get away. “Let go!” you cry out, fear pulsing hot and fast through your veins. But your voice is weak, barely masking the excitement that’s battling for control inside you.

He doesn’t. Instead, he’s on you again, his mouth descending on your neck with a hunger that makes your pulse quicken. One of his hands grips your jaw with rough precision, calloused fingers pressing into your skin, holding you in place. You try to twist away, but he holds you firm, his touch demanding, possessive.

His lips travel down your neck, finding your pulse point first, then moving lower, grazing the soft curve beneath your ear. The sensation sends a shiver down your spine, and despite the panic swirling in your chest, a desperate whimper escapes. Your body betrays you, your hips instinctively rocking toward him, already aching for his touch. The heat between your legs flares, want burning through the fear.

His tongue traces a line down your neck, the warmth of it lingering only for a moment before the cool air chills the wet skin. Then his teeth sink into the muscle above your collarbone, not hard enough to break the skin but enough to make you gasp in pain. You wince, your body tensing as the sharp sensation rolls through you.

Your hand flies up to his head, fingers tangling in his hair as you try to push him off, your grip weak and trembling. But Zayne doesn't budge. His strength overwhelms you, his body pressing against yours with an intensity that leaves no room for escape. His breath is hot against your skin as he continues, relentless, leaving you caught between fear and an overpowering need that consumes you both.

"Zayne," you whimper. He releases his teeth from your neck with a chuckle that curls fear inside you…

His hands take your wrists, leading them above your head. You try to squirm out of his grasp. Partly because you don’t want to give him the satisfaction of pinning you. Partly out of the fear of what he could do if you can’t push him away, his entire aura shifted to something more angry and dangerous than usual. 

"Don't pretend like you don't like it," he says into the angle of your jaw. He leaves soft kisses there while he effortlessly pins your arms above your head. He holds them there with one hand.

The other gropes and squeezes it’s way down your body. Your chest, your side, your waist. He grabs a hold of your hips, thumb perfectly lining up with the dune of your hipbone. He pulls your hips towards him harshly enough to draw a noise from your lips. He works his knee between your thighs, then pushes them open. He swallows any attempted protests with a kiss. His knee presses against your sensitive cunt and you whimper against his lips in response. 

“Oh, what happened to all the struggling?” Zayne mocks you, punctuating his words by squeezing your wrists hard enough to bruise. His hand comes up under your t-shirt and you shiver against the sensation of his fingers on your bare skin. You melt. Fucking putty in his hands.

You open your mouth to protest, to say anything that might break the tension or reclaim some of your control, but before the words can form, Zayne grinds his knee into your core. The pressure sends a jolt of raw pleasure through your body, and the only sound that escapes is a desperate, breathy whine. His reaction is immediate—he hums with satisfaction, his lips curving into a smug smile. He does it again, harder this time, and you can feel him reveling in the control, in the power he has over you.

Your mind scrambles to catch up with your body, which is already responding in ways you can’t hide. You try to meet his gaze, desperately wanting to say something sharp, something biting, anything to regain your footing. But the moment your eyes lock with his, whatever witty retort you had dies on your tongue.

His face is half-hidden in the darkness, but his eyes... there’s something in them that makes your heart stutter. Not just the hunger, not just the dominance—it’s deeper. There’s a flash of genuine anger simmering beneath the surface, something darker that you hadn’t expected, and it sends a ripple of unease through you. The intensity of it levels you, catching you off guard.

Suddenly, this feels like more than just a game. Warmth floods your chest, your body still responding to him in ways you can’t control, but a new sense of apprehension takes root. You’re playing with something dangerous, something unpredictable. The heat between you is no longer just desire—it’s the burn of real fire, and you’re not sure if you’re ready for the flames.

Your breath comes faster as you take in the sight of him. His chest rising and falling, his lips parted slightly, the way his muscles tense beneath his skin. You’re mesmerized, caught between the fear of what he might do next and the undeniable pull he has over you.

You take him in, eyes sweeping over the familiar lines of his body now that he’s standing in front of you. His white lab coat is gone, discarded somewhere behind him, leaving him in his crisp white dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows as if he couldn’t be bothered to fully undress. His shirt is buttoned neatly up to the collar, accentuating his thick, muscular frame in a way that makes your heart skip a beat. The tie around his neck is still knotted, slightly loosened from a long day’s work, but there’s something disheveled about him now—something raw and untamed lurking beneath the polished exterior.

His dark slacks cling to his legs, perfectly tailored to his build, emphasizing his long leg now settled between your core. The soft fabric sways with his movements, while his polished shoes make almost no sound against the floor, their silence unsettling given the tension simmering between you.

His arms cage you in, closing off this small corner of the world to just the two of you. It feels like there’s nothing outside this moment, no one else but him—towering over you, his strength radiating off him in waves. The air between you feels thick, charged with tension and unspoken desire. Your gaze travels back to his face, meeting his intense eyes, and despite the weight of the moment, you can’t help but smile mischievously.

Without a second thought, you turn your head and sink your teeth into his arm, biting down just enough to feel the resistance of his skin, tasting the salty warmth of him. At the same time, you grind your hips down against him, pressing into the hardness beneath his slacks.

You expect him to react instantly, to snarl an insult or degrade you for your boldness. To throw out one of his usual threats—punishment, discipline—his voice dripping with disdain for your insolence, for the way you always push his boundaries. You brace yourself for it, for the sting of his words, the sharp crack of his tone that would send heat rushing through your body.

But it doesn’t come.

Instead, he goes completely still. The tension in his muscles shifts, tightening under your bite, but his silence unnerves you more than anything. You can feel it—the raw power coursing just beneath his skin, his body vibrating with restraint. His muscles flex under your teeth, taut with the effort of holding something back. You release your grip slightly, confused, nervous. But Zayne says nothing. He’s a coiled spring, quiet, calculating, like a predator biding its time.

Methodically, he moves, his hands sliding down your arms, his touch precise, controlled, like he’s performing surgery. Each motion deliberate, calculated. His fingers glide over your skin, and with each inch he covers, the nervousness inside you builds. His control feels absolute, every movement designed to unsettle, to leave you wondering what’s coming next.

Then his hands reach your head, enveloping it completely. His fingers curl around your skull, not rough but firm enough to make you feel small, trapped in his grip. His thumbs rest near your temples, steady, as if he’s taking his time to savor the way your breath catches. The weight of his touch presses down on you, making it impossible to move.

With one harsh movement, he’s pushed you down onto your knees. He undoes his belt and pulls himself free, his beautiful cock glistening with pre-cum. One hand presses hard into your jaw. Harder. His thumb pressing against the muscles there until you open your mouth for him. The head of his cock comes to rest against your lips.

The taste of salt and Zayne’s soap is too tempting to resist. He was usually such a giver, and when you went down on him, he always liked it slow. You lick up the length of his cock and he shivers in response. He drops his hands to your shoulders and you watch his forearms flex in pleasure. Your tongue swirls around his soft tip, and then you take him into your mouth soft and sweet.

Except... this time he doesn’t respond with shaking breaths and high pitched whimpers. Not even an utterance of your name. Insecurity flashes through you - you were sure this is how he usually liked it. Were you not doing well enough for him? You cast your eyes upwards for guidance, barely able to see him in the dark. 

“You really think that’s going to cut it?” His voice is cold and hard. Then his hands are on the back of your head, pushing you down onto his cock so fast and deep you almost gag. You pull away to drag a sharp breath into your lungs, abdomen muscles flexing.

 “You want to be fucked like a slut, you’re going to have to earn it.” He pulls you back down onto him.

Suppressing the urge to gag brings tears to your eyes, and it isn’t long until they’re falling down your cheek, mingling with the saliva making a mess of your mouth and chin. Wet, choking noises echo into the empty hall. When you start to slow, whimpering from the effort, he’s quick to pick up the slack. He thrusts his hips forward, pinning your head between him and the wall. You choke and gag around him, struggling to adjust around the brutal pace he sets, fucking your throat like you're nothing to him but a toy. Your hands come up to his hips, but he wrenches them away with a furious grunt. 

He pulls out suddenly, thick strands of saliva dripping off his cock. His breathing is hard and sweat rolls down the lines of his ab muscles. Your shoulders slump and you try to catch your breath. You’re absolutely spent. How humiliating that he didn’t even have to touch you to keep you wet for him, a vague sense of disgust emanating through your core.

“Was that good enough?” you weakly ask, but you might as well be begging him to fuck you for the look in your eyes. You don’t even bother to wipe the spit from your chin or the tears from your cheeks. You hope the sight gets under his skin so he can fuck you just as rough as he did your throat. 

“I don’t buy it,” he says. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion and frustration. 

“What?” 

“I just don’t buy that you want me to fuck you.” 

You’re about to ask what you can possibly do more to prove it when something hard presses against your warmth, pushing your soaked boxers against you. You look down do see Zayne presenting his shoe. Polished and tightly tied, the mere sight of them gave obvious impression of what he wanted from you. But why?

You look up at him, but all he does is look back at you, expectantly. Your can feel the heat creeping up your neck as you adjust to straddle his shoe. You keep hoping he’ll just end your suffering by mocking you for even considering it, but it never comes. The cold, hard leather against you sends a wave of electricity through your body. Your hips are moving on their own. Your body desperate for anything it can get, chasing it’s high no matter how humiliating. You turn your face away from him, unable to stand him looking at you like this. Grinding against his shoe... 

“There they are. My desperate little darling,” his voice has the first touch of warmth it’s had all night. It’s enough to spurn you on, the heat coiling in your abdomen. You pick up the pace against your will, your body chasing ecstasy like an uncaged animal. And Zayne just watches you, expression never changing, never reaching down to touch you. God, were you really going to cum on his shoe while he looked at you like that?

He kneeled down to one knee, doing his best not to disturb your work. His strong hands take hold of your hips and push you harder against his shoe, dragging your hips up and down. You moan, tears collecting in your eyes again. You can’t believe you’re enjoying this. Even - no, especially because it hurt. You were getting closer, your moans coming faster. 

“Beg for it,” Zayne orders. 

“Please let me cum, Zayne, please!” 

“Tsk. Not that,” he pulls his shoe away like he's disgusted and you whimper in protest. Then, as if you were light as a feather, he’s tossing you to the side. You catch yourself on your elbows and feel them scrape against the ceramic floor. Your hips grind against the air as they searched for any friction at all that would send you over the edge. They found nothing. 

“Silly girl.” He sounds bored as he stands to his full height above you.

You watch as his hand pulls a scalpel from his pocket. It captures his full attention, glinting in the light of the TV behind him. When he speaks, it's almost to the room.

“Isn’t this your favorite part? Where you try and fail to escape?” 

You don’t move. He flips the scalpel in the air, catching it by the tip of the blade, and then again to catch it by the handle. He admires it as if it were the most beautiful thing in the world. 

“Start crawling,” he suggests. 

You push yourself onto tired, shaking limbs and try to get up. They give out on you. You pull yourself forward on your elbows instead. You hear the nearly silent creak of his shoes. The another. Then another. You feel small crawling beneath him, listening to the gentle whirl of the scalpel as he tosses it in the air. His shoes creak again, then again. 

You turned to look at him. You were almost overwhelmed at how he towered above you. His broad shoulders blocking out the light in the hallway. One hand busy toying with the scalpel, the other pulling his pants further down his hips. He was clearly taking his time.

“You ever wonder why you like to fight so much?” You watch shoe follow shoe in lazy strides until they were at either side of your ribcage, standing above you.

“Should I let you get away again?” he asks, but then he’s dropping to his knees, pinning you beneath him. Fear takes hold of your vocal chords and you make a desperate noise, pushing at his legs. “Will you just give in already?” 

With a calculated shift, Zayne turns your body to face him, your heart pounding so hard it feels like it might burst from your chest. The tension between you crackles in the air, and before you can fully process what’s happening, his hand finds your neck, fingers wrapping around it with unyielding force. His palm presses against your throat, squeezing just enough to send a jolt of pain through you, sharp and undeniable.

"It takes about 10 seconds for pressure to the jugular to result in unconsciousness," Zayne says calmly, his voice low, almost clinical, as if reciting a fact from one of his textbooks. His grip tightens again, harder this time, and the sensation of control he wields is overwhelming.

The edges of your vision blur almost immediately, the world around you starting to fade. You feel lightheaded, like the ground is slipping away beneath your feet, your body caught in the thin space between pain and pleasure. But beneath the intoxicating sensations, panic begins to swell. The lightness in your head grows, and then you feel weightless, disconnected from reality as the darkness creeps in around your sight.

Your body starts to respond, instinct driving you toward the rising sense of panic. The pleasure and thrill that had mixed with the danger of it all suddenly feel too real, too much, as Zayne relentlessly pushes you to your limits.

You bring your hand up weakly, your fingers trembling, and tap his arm three times. The motion is small but deliberate, your safe signal.

For a brief, terrifying second, you wonder if he’s noticed.

He releases and you gasp for air. He lets you catch your breath, and for a minute you’re almost angry. But the growing wet between your legs betrays you to yourself, forcing you to admit you liked being pushed to the edge. An exhilarated smile picks up the corners of your mouth and Zayne, intently waiting for you to lead, just watches.

“More,” is all you need to say, and he’s on you again. Hand lighter on your throat, he brandishes the scalpel to catch your eye. It makes contact with your skin and you fight to control a shiver. 

It glides around your shoulder, then down your collar bone. The razor sharp point leaving a thin, red cut beneath the bone. You gasp, back arching into the sting. He withdraws. 

“If you keep squirming, I’m going to hurt you for real.” It’s as much a warning as it is a threat, and the dark rasp of his voice sends a chill down your spine. 

Then you go still again, he continues. The scalpel crosses your chest, taking it’s time tracing each and every one of your ribs. He draws a bead of blood there, before lifting the blade again. You moan, squeezing your thighs together to keep from moving your hips. The anticipation almost too much for you. But the movement catches his eye. He pockets the scalpel, and then he’s prying your thighs apart so hard you feel the ache in your hips. You try to shimmy away, but his hands hold your thighs fast against him. 

“I said hold still,” he grunts, squeezing his hands around the squish of your thighs hard enough that you make a noise. "What part of stop squirming do you not get?"

Your hand comes up to his hips, trying to hold them at a distance, but it doesn’t help. He pulls you closer to him and you feel his cock hard and leaking over your boxers. Fuck, you almost come undone all over again. Feeling him pressed against you like this... his cock easily reaching your belly button, reminding you how deep inside you he could be. 

“Zayne, please,” you whimper. 

“Please what?” He asks. You feel the cold blade against the tender, exposed part of your thigh. 

“Please fuck me.” 

He grunts, a noise that commits to nothing. He pulls the fabric of your boxers off your body and slips the scalpel beneath it. He cuts the thin fabric off of you in a show of strength and skill that intimidates you. 

He leans over you slowly, his hips pressed flush against yours, his cock pressed against where you want it most. A hand comes up to your face then, holding your jaw hard as he turns your face away from his. The scalpels beautiful surface approaches your cheek. Your breath picks up, fear coursing through you. He says nothing, and it makes it all the more terrifying. Your instincts freeze every muscle in your body. 

“You asked for this,” he reminds you, tracing the curve of your cheek. You bite your lip.

He pockets the scalpel once more, and you realize then that he's still entirely dressed, his pants only pulled down enough to fuck you. He shifts his hips, lining up with your needy hole. You’re already moaning for him.

“Begging me to use you like this, begging me to hurt you like this.” He pushes into you, your cunt struggling to adjust to his size. He only makes it a couple inches. He pulls out of you, then thrusts again, moaning as he does. This time when he pushes into you, he completely fills you. You both release an almost victorious sigh.

“Always fucking struggling. Can never just make it easy,” he growls, that angry look in his eye. His jaw flexes. Your cunt tenses around him.

He thrusts into you again, and again, so hard it feels like he could fuck you in half. He dips his face into your neck, moaning.

"You want me to force you onto my cock." His voice tightened with effort, but never lost that black-honey edge. "Can't say no to you. Do this because I love you."

You reach up and cling to his shoulders, nails digging into the fabric. His words shouldn't thrill you, but they did. Your eyes flutter closed. Your body shook beneath him.

“This is messed up,” Zayne’s hips start to pick up their pace. You wrap your legs around him, encouraging him, pulling him deeper into you. You find yourself moaning his own words back at him; so messed up, so messed up. 

Fuck, he felt so good. The two of you dissolved into senseless babbling, saying whatever it took to push each other closer to the edge. A meaningless cloud of fuck and just like that and you begged for this until neither of you could form words at all. Your pace became erratic, moaning into each other’s necks, limbs tightening around each other as you both approached your highs.

“Fuck, fuck, m’so-” you barely manage, panting and moaning through your words. Your thighs tighten around him and he groans in response. 

And then you’re coming undone together. His hips driving his cock as deep as they can with the primal need to fuck his cum deeper inside you. You take it, greedily, breathlessly as your own climax rocks through your body like an earthquake. 

He rests his forehead against your chest while he pulls out of you, then collapses onto the cool ceramic floor of the hallway beside you. He turns you onto your side and buries his head against your back, forearms tight against your chest while he hugs you close to him. 

“I didn’t think,” you take a deep breath, trying not to pant through your sentence, “that when I asked you to use me after your work shifts, that it’d be like that.” 

“Bad?” He asks, his voice uncharacteristically small. 

“No, no,” you rush to recover the situation. You lace your fingers with his, “Of course not.” 

He says nothing. You turn to look at him, and there’s that distant, tired look on his face. 

“Are you okay...?” 

“I will tell you about it soon, darling” he says. You hum as acknowledgement, wishing you could say anything, but feeling like nothing was the right thing to say. Instead you just let him hold you for awhile. 

Zayne held you close, his body a solid, comforting weight against yours, his bodily warmth gradually soothing the whirlwind of sensation still buzzing under your skin. But then, you felt him shift. His fingers, cold and precise, began to ghost over the cuts he had made, tracing the delicate lines he’d etched into your skin with surgical precision. You shivered at his touch, a soft gasp escaping your lips.

His eyes softened, and in a voice barely louder than a whisper, he said, “I need to tend to these.” His words were gentle, but firm, a quiet reminder of the care he always took with you, even now.

He pressed a tender kiss to your temple, the warmth of it contrasting with the coolness of his fingers, and then he pulled away. You watched him button his pants, his movements deliberate but unhurried, before disappearing down the hall. Even through the exhaustion weighing you down, you heard the faint sound of him rummaging in the bathroom, retrieving what he needed.

When he returned, Zayne knelt beside you, his medical kit in hand. His usual calm, professional demeanor was still there, but this time it was softened with a tenderness only reserved for you. Gently, he began to disinfect the cuts, his touch as light as it was thorough. The sting of the antiseptic bit into your skin, making you wince, but his hand found yours, his thumb brushing reassuringly over your knuckles. It was a silent promise: I’m here, I’ve got you.

With every stroke of the gauze, every carefully placed bandaid, Zayne’s focus never wavered. His gaze remained trained on you, on the cuts he was tending to, but there was something deeper in his expression—something protective, almost reverent, as though he was caring for a part of himself.

When he finally finished, he sat back slightly, his hand resting on your arm, his eyes searching yours as if to make sure you were truly okay. You could see the tension from earlier still lingering in the set of his jaw, the concern etched faintly into the lines of his face.

“I’m okay, I promise,” you murmured, your voice heavy with exhaustion, your body finally giving in to the weight of the night. Your limbs felt like lead, but your heart fluttered at the care he was taking with you, the gentleness of his hands now so different from the intensity you’d felt earlier.

“I’m just…so exhausted now” you sigh, briefly closing your eyes as another wave of tiredness washed through you.

Zayne’s expression softened into a small smile, one so full of adoration it made your chest tighten with affection. He stood, helping you up with careful hands, supporting your weight as he guided you to the couch. His arm stayed wrapped around you, keeping you close, steadying you as he laid you down gently, as though you were something fragile.

He settled in beside you, his body curling protectively around yours, pulling you against his chest. “We’ll clean up later,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your forehead in a soft kiss. The warmth of his breath and the steady rhythm of his heartbeat lulled you, the scent of him comforting, grounding you.

You nestled deeper into him, the tension of the night melting away in his embrace. Wrapped in his arms, in the safety of his presence, your exhaustion finally caught up with you. Your eyelids fluttered closed, the world around you fading into the soft haze of sleep. And there, in the quiet of the night, you both drifted off together, tangled in each other, with nothing but the sound of your breathing and the quiet rise and fall of his chest.

[revelboo]

May I request a part 2 to “Skin and Bones: Megatron x pet reader”? Maybe megatron is stuck taking care of the reader again. Skywarp’s a d*ck who forgot to feed the poor organic that morning. And maybe there’s another incident where the human doesn’t think anyone is in earshot and megatron hears them singing and/or frees-stying poetry because they are bored. Bonus points if the human gets a bouncy ball as a gift from some con (if you’re choice I’m thinking Starscream or Soundwave but maybe Megatron? Whoever you feel is most likely to do it) for entertainment and just as said con of your choice turns around to address a concerned con to say “Oh don’t worry they aren’t a human sparkling they won’t try to eat it and choke, it’ll be fine.” The human pulls an Andy from parks and rec by throwing the ball against the nearest metal wall and it bouncing back to hit them in the face making them fall to the ground. 😂

Skin and Bones pt 2

Megatron x reader- pet

• A day without drama. Without putting out fires, dealing with whatever abominations Shockwave has created, or handling poorly thought out take over attempts by his SIC. Megatron’s not quite sure what to make of it as he rounds a corner and nearly steps on the human. Because it’s somehow loose and unsupervised and it definitely shouldn’t be.

• Yelping, you throw yourself backward as you nearly run right under the huge foot of Megatron in your hurry. Falling back on your butt, you stare up at him with dread. Especially as you hear your pursuer’s heavy steps. Oh, you’re dead. The leader of the Decepticons stares at you before looking back the way you came. Because you can both hear Skywarp threatening to weld you to a wall when he catches you. Very dead.

• Megatron frowns as the human darts toward him, having apparently decides its pursuer is scarier than he is and he’s not sure what to make of that. That he’s the safe harbor in the storm. Hearing the snarling profanity before the Seeker darts into the hallway, Megatron bends and scoops up the human, once again surprised by how light it is, insubstantial skin and bones. Aside from a sharp intake of breath, it’s silent. Those big eyes stare pleadingly up at him from that oddly almost Cybertronian face. Aside from the softness of it, he can almost pretend it’s a particularly tiny minicon.

• “Lose something?” He asks, dragging his optics from the human to Skywarp as the Seeker freezes.

• “It got away from me. Won’t happen again.” Baring his denta in a smile that promises pain, he holds out a hand. You shrink back, pressing tighter to the hand holding you.

• “Why aren’t you on patrol?” Shifting his cupped hand closer to his chassis, Megatron huffs as those little hands hold on to him. Clinging to him for safety. That shouldn’t warm his spark, but it does. He’s not soft on the hapless little creature. Of course not.

• “I’m not scheduled for-“

• “Allow me to rephrase that, go patrol,” he says, noting the way the human’s shoulders slump in relief as it looks up at him. Skywarp stiffens and for a moment, he thinks the mech might argue, then he turns on his heel. But not before shooting a filthy look at the human in his hand. He waits until Skywarp is gone before rumbling. “Want to explain what you did to make him so angry?”

• Breath hitching, your lips part, because he’s asking you a question. And he expects an answer. Starscream, Thundercracker, and Soundwave treat you so much like a badly trained, but loved puppy that you forget that they know you’re intelligent sometimes. Those red optics are burning a hole in you as you debate how much trouble the truth will get you in before you start talking.

• It wasn’t really your fault anyway. Thundercracker had given you the dodge ball like you were a little kid not an adult. How old did they think you were? Turning the hard rubber ball in your palms to test the weight of it, you’d offered Thundercracker a smile because he meant well at least. He was always bringing you weird stuff and when you thank him, he does that weirdly adorable wing flutter just like Starscream does when you agree with him.

• No sooner has he left, you’d become aware of Skywarp- your skin had prickled in goosebumps as you’d tried to not panic. Because this one had made it his goal to mess with you. Refusing to give him the satisfaction of looking, your skin still crawled because he’s there behind you. You could feel him behind you, watching with cruel predatory interest. You’d tossed the ball up and caught it to get a feel for it, then turned and lobbed it right at Skywarp’s face since it was right there. And when were you going to get a better opportunity?

• After admitting what you’d done as revenge for an earlier attempt by Skywarp to drown you that he’d generously called a bath, you fell silent and waited for Megatron’s judgement. Really, it’d been Skywarp’s fault for leaning so close to you- what had he expected? And a lot of the anger was because, by sheer luck, you’d nailed him square in the optic.

• Your tension drains away when Megatron actually laughs, his other hand coming up to ruffle your hair a bit too roughly with a servo and declare you tiny but fierce. Sure. He can call you whatever he wants if he keeps Skywarp from murdering you. You relax in his hand as he carries you back to the throne room to wait for Soundwave or Starscream to notice you’re missing. Previous Next

[dirtyvulture]

Natasha Romanoff* x Fem!Reader

18+ only, read at your own risk

Requested by @amanda13parker: GP!Nat who has blanket consent from fem!R to use her whenever and Nat takes full advantage of it. Cooking? Not anymore she's not. Bent over the counter and stuffed. Watching a movie? Nope. Riding Nat and bouncing on her ... thing... Sleeping? Woke up to being bred. And R is loving every second of it while being praised and a bit degraded, being called by Nat her good girl and her breeding slut since she enjoys it so much.

AN: Enjoy, friend! And everyone should go check out your artwork. 👀 This is basically just porn with no plot, so keep scrolling if you're looking for something with substance. 😂

*Nat has a penis.

You hear the front door slam open and Natasha trudge inside, dropping her heavy work bag to the floor.

"I'm in the kitchen!" you call out, although you know she can guess where you are based on the smell of your cooking. You're almost done now, the stew aromatic and bubbling in the pot, and you're taking the freshly baked bread out of the oven when Natasha walks in.

Just as you set the hot pan on the counter, you feel Natasha's arms coil around your waist, her front pressing against your back, her weight heavy and warm against you.

"That smells so good, baby," she whispers into your ear and your heart rate quickens when you feel her bulge press against your butt.

"Are you hungry?" you ask.

"For you," she responds, and before you can protest, Natasha has you turned around, facing the counter. Your shorts are on the floor as she wrestles out of her pants, her strong hands lifting your hips up to angle yourself back.

"Oh Nat," you moan as her thick cock slides through your center. You feel yourself dripping onto her in record time and you're glad she can't see how red you are in the face at how quickly she turns you on. Her fingers part your folds and rub your clit roughly, causing you to keen louder and thrust back, the emptiness in your core begging to be filled by her.

Natasha throbs at the noises you make, her breathing picking up as she prepares you for her. She slaps her cock against your butt before sliding in, grunting as you tighten and convulse around her.

"Fuck babe, your'e so big," you pant, pushing back to take her entire length. Natasha slams her hips forward, almost sending you crashing into the counter, setting a hard and face pace you can barely keep up with.

Good thing the bread is already out of the oven, because you have no chance of going anywhere now.

Natasha's grip on your waist tightens to keep you in place as she slams into you over and over, the tip of her cock brushing the sensitive spot inside of you with every thrust. You're almost standing on your tiptoes as you try to angle yourself to fit her better, moaning in ecstasy at the thought of her using you like a personal Fleshlight.

"Right there, Nat. Right there. Please don't stop," you beg, holding onto the edge of the counter so tightly if it weren't made of granite a piece would have snapped off.

"Look at you taking me so well. My good girl," Natasha grunts, losing some of her rhythm as she nears her release. The slick noises of sex fill the kitchen, and with one final thrust you come undone, spilling all over her cock.

***********************************************************************

Movie nights don't always go as planned for the two of you either. More than half the time they end up with both of you on top of each other, Natasha's cock somehow finding its way inside of you every time. But you don't mind. You love being bred by your girlfriend and even if your favorite movie of all time was playing, you'd gladly let yourself be taken any way Natasha wants.

And if being dragged onto Natasha's lap halfway through a movie and made to ride her cock until your legs were shaking and you were seeing stars wasn't enough, Natasha has the audacity to wake you up in the middle of the night, already with her cock between your legs, hard and ready for another round.

Both of you are lying on your sides, and you lift your leg higher to give her easier access to sink into you to the hilt. Your brain is a scrambled mess from being woken up so suddenly and fucked so frequently, but you don't mind at all. You love being used by Natasha and you love making her feel good.

The bed rocks as Natasha thrusts into you, holding onto your leg to keep them separated.

"You like being woken up just to be bred like the slut you are?" she grunts into your ear.

"Yes, yes!" you respond, reaching back to tangle your hand in her hair, dragging her head down into the crook of your neck.

"Who's slut are you?" Natasha asks, her thrusts quickening. She will never get over how well you take her, like your pussy was meant for her cock and her cock only.

"Yours!" you pant, slick running down the inside of your thigh. You aren't even sure if you've cum already, but Natasha gives no signs of slowing down as she plows into you. She gropes onto your breasts, biting bruises onto your neck and shoulders, handling you roughly as she searches for her release. And you're happy to lie there and be used, your body in a state of euphoria as Natasha finally cums into you, the hot pulses of her seed triggering yet another orgasm from you, and you go limp in her arms.

"That's my good girl," Natasha murmurs into your sweaty neck. "You'll look so beautiful carrying my child."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Please like, comment, and reblog! Follow for more content. 🥰

[pigsfeedermaster]

He's been trying to lose weight for years but he always get the weight back... 😂 He should start accepting what he is 🐷🐖 and how sexy he is 🐷😈

[jensengirl83]

Pining In The Pines

Dean x reader

Word count-3843

Warnings- Angst, some fluff

Summary- Y/N and the boys have to go on a hunt in her old hometown. She's not happy to go home, and especially not when Dean makes a comment that brings up bad memories. How will she take it? And will Dean be able to make it right?

A/N- This fills my Secret Passageway square for @jacklesversebingo

First, I suck at summaries 😂 Second, this fic is a little self-indulgent. I've written it about where I'm actually from and the stigma about the people in this area. I really hope you like it!

“So, get this,” Sam started the conversation as he looked at his laptop. 

Y/N couldn’t stop the giggle that bubbled in her chest. It never failed. When he found a hunt, the first words out of his mouth were, ‘So, get this.’ That’s how she and Dean knew to stop and pay attention. He had something they needed to hear. So, she tried to contain her laughter and give Sam the attention he wanted. 

“Y/N…Do you have to laugh every single time?” Sam groaned but didn’t wait for a response, continuing with what he wanted to say, “There’s supposedly been a Wendigo spotted in Morehead, Kentucky. Homeowners caught it on their security camera for their driveway.”

“Morehead…Isn’t that close to where you grew up, sweetheart?” Dean wondered, looking over at the huntress beside him. 

“It’s a few counties over, but yeah, it’s close enough. Did you say there was footage?” she questioned, leaning forward to look at Sam’s laptop as he spun it around for her and Dean to see. 

Her breath caught in her throat as Dean put his hand on her lower back as he leaned forward to watch the video. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she had fallen in love with the eldest Winchester. But how was she supposed to be around him, living in the bunker with him, and not fall head over heels? 

It was true that he had a temper, could be a real grump, and be downright mean sometimes. But, over the years, she’d learned that his temper flared most when someone he cared about was in danger. He would be grumpy when the weight of the world had gotten almost too heavy to bear, and he tried to push it down and keep it bottled up. He was mean when he thought he needed to push someone he cared about away because he was the one putting them in danger. To her, that was just the sign of a man who had been hurt, a man who loved deeply, one who cared so much that the thought of losing someone he loved was unbearable. So, how was she not going to fall for him at some point? 

But that’s as far as it went. She would never admit her feelings. She couldn’t. The likely rejection would be her end, and she would have to leave the bunker. She’d rather pine for him in tortuous silence than not have him in her life at all. So, as always, she shoved her feelings back down, focusing on the screen in front of her, and prepared for the hunt she knew was coming. 

“Earth to Y/N,” Dean nudged her, clearly seeing she was in her own little world. 

“Yeah, yeah. I’m watching,” she rolled her eyes, trying to hide that she was fantasizing about the green-eyed Adonis. 

“Where was that pretty little head of yours?” he teased, his words making her heart ache. If only he really thought that way. 

“Just thinking of what I’ll need to pack. ‘Cause we’re clearly going to Kentucky, am I right?” she lied, hoping they would buy it. 

“Yeah, we have to check this out. I’ve never heard of a Wendigo this far east before,” Sam answered, getting Dean’s attention away from her. Thank Chuck. 

“There’s a lot of things in the Appalachian mountains that no one knows about. Trust me, you don’t want to be caught in those woods alone after dark,” she shivered at the thought. 

“Don’t tell me you’re scared of the dark?” Dean tried to tease, but she gave him a stern look that made him think twice. 

“You should know that I’m not scared of the dark. I follow you into some of the darkest, creepiest places on earth. But, I grew up there, Dean. It’s not even just the monsters you have to worry about. I mean, there are bears, mountain lions, wolves…” she trailed off, not wanting to mention some of the crazy people that live in those mountains. 

“Okay, okay,” Dean huffed, throwing his hands up in mock surrender, “I get it.” 

“You better. You have to keep your head on a swivel while we’re in the woods. I’d hate to have to save your sorry ass from the real-life Yogi Bear,” she winked, “Because your ass will be the picnic basket.” 

Dean crossed his arms over his chest, annoyed at her sarcasm as Sam laughed. Even though she was crazy in love with him, she could give him shit right back. And to be honest, she thoroughly enjoyed frustrating him. As she saw it, it was payback for him making her love him in the first place. She continued to chuckle as she went to her room to pack. Y/N didn’t like the thought of going home. Too many memories she’d like to forget. But duty calls, so she was packing her bags for the long drive to southeast Kentucky. 

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I highly doubt there’s a Wendigo here. They don’t stay in the wide-open woods,” Dean complained while trekking through the mountains. 

“Dean, do you not know anything about the topography of Kentucky?” Y/N asked, shaking her head in annoyance. He’d been in a mood all day. 

“Yes, sweetheart. I spend all my free time studying the layout of a state I rarely ever visit,” his sarcasm made her want to smack him in the head. 

“Well, dear,” she said just as sarcastically, “Kentucky is known for its underground cave systems. You know, Mammoth Cave. One of the biggest cave systems in the world…”  

“Of course! Because spelunking is high on my to-do list!” 

“Oh! Look at him, Sam. He’s using big boy words like spelunking. I’m so proud of you, Dean!” she half shouted at him. Trying to keep her voice down so as not to attract unwanted attention to whatever was out there. 

“Guys! Knock it off. We’re here to kill a Wendigo. Not for you two to kill each other!” Sam exclaimed, throwing his hands up in frustration. 

“She started it,” Dean whined, acting like a child. 

“Fuck off, Dean,” she growled as she walked ahead of them. Leading them to the caves she knew were close. 

Y/N ignored the bickering between the brothers behind her as she made her way through the trees. She loved Dean, but today, she thought about leaving him in one of the caves they found. He’d been an ass since they woke up at the motel, and she couldn’t figure out what had his boxers in a bunch. They’d had to share a bed, but she didn’t think he’d be that pissed about that, but she wouldn’t put anything past him at that point. But, whatever it was, it tempted her to make him Wendigo lunch. 

“Slow down, Y/N. We’re not born and raised hillbillies like you are. It’s taking us a little longer to navigate this hellscape,” Dean yelled, grumbling under his breath about her getting too far ahead. 

Y/N froze. That was the last straw. Yes, she’d been born and raised in the area, but that word…Hillbilly. She’d been trying to get rid of that stigma since she left the mountains, and now hearing Dean, the man she loved, call her that derogatory term was too much to take. 

“Let me tell you something, asshole! Yeah, I grew up here, but I’m not a fucking hillbilly! I’ll have you know not everyone who lives in Appalachia are backwoods, uneducated, rednecks! So, take that term, and shove it straight up your ass!” she screamed, her anger boiling over into dangerous territory. 

Before either of the boys could say a word, a guttural, terrifying growl tore through the darkening woods. Y/N spun around to see what they’d been there to find. The Wendgio was only about thirty feet behind her, moving in quickly. Sam shouted for her to get behind him, breaking her out of her stupor. Once she’d cleared his line of sight, Sam grabbed his homemade flamethrower, flicking his lighter to ignite it, but nothing happened. He tried again but to no avail. Y/N’s screams tore through the night air…

“Run! Follow me!” 

The boys were quick at her heels as she weaved them in and out of the trees and underbrush. Dean couldn’t help but think about how impressed he was at her agility in that terrain. He could tell she’d grown up here and knew her way around, which brought him to his next thought. How guilty he felt for saying what he had. But now was not the time to apologize. Right now, he had to concentrate on not losing sight of her and getting shredded to pieces by the monster on their tails.  

“Here! Guys, hurry!” she shouted, an old moonshining cabin in her sight. 

Once she reached the cabin, she flung open the door, waiting for the boys to enter before slamming it shut, silently praying that the rickety lock would hold just long enough to devise a plan. 

“What the hell happened back there?” Dean asked, hands on his knees as he panted for breath. 

“I don’t know! The flamethrower has never not worked before,” Sam answered with the same labored breathing as his brother. 

“Well, we can figure that out later. Now, we need to figure out how to stay alive!” Y/N yelled, panic starting to set in. 

“Calm down, sweetheart. We’ll be okay,” Dean tried to calm her down, but she was still too angry with him. 

“Don’t! Do not ‘sweetheart’ me! You had no right to talk to me like that!” 

“Look, swe- Y/N, I’m sorry. But I don’t understand why that made you so mad,” Dean spoke as he looked around the cabin for something to use as a makeshift weapon. 

“That was a shit apology, Winchester. Just…just don’t speak to me until we get out of this mess,” she groaned, then mumbled, “If we live through this mess.” 

“Hey!” Dean shouted, getting her attention, “We are getting out of this. Don’t talk like that.” 

“Can you tell me how you plan to get us out of here? Cause I don’t see another way out except through the door that Wendigo is now trying to beat down!” 

As she walked toward Dean, her foot almost went through the floor, or at least it felt like it. She stopped, pushing down with her foot one more time. The bounce under her foot had her laughing loudly, and the boys looked at her like she’d lost her mind. Dean spoke as she started to rip the rug she stood on out of the way. 

“Care to tell us what you find so funny?” 

“This!” she continued to laugh in relief as she pointed to the hatch in the floor where she’d been standing, “It’s our way out!” 

“How do you know that? It could be just an old cellar,” Sam asked, walking over to inspect what she’d found. 

“Well, as Dean so nicely put it, us hillbillies would dig secret passageways to transport the moonshine back and forth without the police seeing them. They almost always lead to an abandoned coal mine or cave opening. Sometimes other cabins.” 

“Y/N, come on, I tried to apologize. I didn’t know it would upset you that much,” Dean threw his hands up in exasperation. 

“Well, it did, and…” she started to argue when Sam interrupted them. 

“Maybe you two can finish this fight once we know we’re not going to die? Let’s go!” 

Y/N and Dean simultaneously rolled their eyes. Sam would have told them they were two peas in a pod if they weren’t in such a hurry to save their asses. Y/N was the first one down the ladder, explaining that she’d be their best bet for not getting completely lost underground, and neither brother disagreed. Dean followed, with Sam on his heels. Once they were underground, Y/N led the way, and the boys were impressed with how well she could get around in the tunnels. 

After what seemed like a lifetime, Dean was going to ask if she really knew where she was going, but before he could open his mouth, they turned a corner and could see a light up ahead in the tunnel's ceiling. Y/N was climbing the ladder through another hatch before Dean knew what was happening. Maybe her nickname should be Squirrel instead of him, he chuckled to himself. As the last brother made it out of the tunnel and into another cabin, Y/N slammed the hatch, pushing an old, heavy piece of furniture over it. Luckily, this one was still quite furnished, with beds still in the bedrooms and an old couch in front of a fireplace. 

“This is home until morning,” she stated, looking around, finding, albeit dusty, pillows and blankets in a closet.

“Better than nothing,” Sam shrugged, walking into one of the bedrooms and shutting the door, leaving only one bedroom for her and Dean. 

“Looks like we’re sharing again, sweetheart,” Dean chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. 

“Nah, take the bed. I’ll take the couch,” she whispered, not looking at him. Damn, she was still mad. 

“I’m not taking a bed and putting you on an old debilitated couch, Y/N.” 

“It’s fine. My adrenaline is still too high to sleep. Besides, I’ll keep watch so you can get some rest. You have to drive us back to the bunker tomorrow. I can sleep in the car.” 

“Y/N…” 

“No, Dean, it’s fine. Please, just take the bed. I’m too tired to argue,” she almost begged, wanting to be alone. 

“I thought you said you weren’t tired?” he smirked, trying to joke, but she wasn’t having it. 

“I’m mentally exhausted. I just need time to myself to wind down. Now, please, go get some sleep so we can get the hell out of here in the morning,” she pleaded, the look on her face breaking his heart. He had really hurt her with what he said. 

“Okay, sweetheart. Good night,” he said dejectedly, knowing it would be a sleepless night. His guilt would make sure of it. 

“Night,” she replied, turning her back to him, sitting down on the couch, staring out the window, never glancing his way. The click of the door made her wince as Dean went to bed.

Sleepless night was an understatement. Dean’s eyes didn’t close once as he lay there thinking how wrong the day had gone. He and Y/N had argued since their feet hit the floor that morning. Him being an ass was the reason for it. He hated fighting with her, but when he woke that morning, she was curled up at his side, her head on his chest. Usually, a man wouldn't complain about having a beautiful woman wrapped around him, but it tends to put you in a pissy mood when it’s a woman you love but can’t have. 

Dean was ass over tea kettle for Y/N, but he’d never tell her that. She deserved so much better than being saddled with a man who could barely stand his own company most days. He drank too much, and he wasn’t good at communicating how he felt. He knew that. Sam had told him many times he needed to learn to open up, but he didn’t want to burden anyone with the shitshow that was his mind. Especially her. So, as with his other emotions, he pushed his love for her deep and tried to ignore it. Lately, that hadn’t been working so well. As he lay there telling himself all the reasons he couldn’t have her, a sound caught his attention. He tiptoed to the door, cracking it slowly, and what he saw had him rushing out the door. 

“Y/N, sweetheart, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” he quizzed her as he rushed to her side, pulling her into his arms. Her sobs were what he’d heard. 

“I’m fine, Dean. Go back to bed,” she hiccuped through her tears. She couldn’t tell him the full truth. 

“Obviously, you are the opposite of fine. Talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” 

“Hey, look at me,” he whispered, placing her chin between his thumb and index finger to turn her face to him, “Is this about today?” 

“Partially,” she admitted, trying to turn her head back to the window, but his grip wouldn’t let her.

“Y/N…I’m so so sorry. I know I was being an ass, but I had no idea it would hurt your feelings like that. Can you explain to me why? I’m not trying to fight. I honestly don’t understand.” 

“I’ve tried to get rid of the ‘hillbilly’ stigma since I left this place. It's always the same thing whenever someone finds out where I’m from. There’s this image people have about people from the Appalachian mountains that just aren’t true. We’re not a bunch of ignorant, uneducated people who live deep in the woods and never come out. Unfortunately, movies and TV shows have depicted us in such a bad light that most people think that’s all we are. And when that term comes from the man you…” she gasped, catching what she almost said. But Dean caught it as well. 

“The man you what, Y/N?” he asked, holding his breath. Was she about to admit what he thought? Maybe, just maybe, he could try to be better, be the man she deserved if she loved him too. 

“Dean…” she whimpered, trying to turn away from him again, but he wasn’t letting her go now. 

“Uh uh, say it. Say it, Y/N,” he pleaded, his eyes staring into hers, “Were you going to say the man you loved?” 

“Yes! Okay? I was going to say the man I loved!” she shouted in frustration as she jumped from the couch, finally breaking Dean’s hold on her, “Now, go ahead and tell me that you don’t see me that way, tell me that you don’t want me, so I can prepare to pack my shit and leave when we get back to the bunker. Because I can’t stay there and see you every day after your rejection. I just can’t.” 

Dean stood and walked to her as she stood staring out the window, her back to him after her confession. He touched her shoulder, gently turning her to face him. Her look of sadness and despair nearly ripped his heart from his chest. He thought having his heart literally ripped out would hurt less than seeing her like this. He slid his hand up from her shoulder to cup her cheek. A tear trickled down her face as she closed her eyes at his touch, and he swiped it away with his thumb. 

“Is that what you want me to tell you, or do you want me to tell you the truth?” he asked softly, waiting for her to open her eyes, which didn’t take a split second. Her eyes went wide. 

“What are you saying?” she uttered shakily. 

“I’m saying that I love you, too, Y/N. I have for a long time.” 

“But, but,” she stuttered, trying to find her words, “You were so mad at me when we woke up this morning. That isn’t how someone acts when they love the person in bed with them.” 

“Sweetheart, I was mad because I opened my eyes to the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen curled up against me, and all I could think was how I wanted it to mean something, and I didn’t think it ever would. If I’m being honest, you could do so much better. And thinking I’d never have you that way pissed me off because I’ve never wanted someone as bad as I want you, Y/N. You’re my first thought when I wake up, and I fall asleep picturing you beside me. I know I’m not a good man, and there’s someone out there that could and would give you more than I’ll ever be able to, but if you really love me, I’m going to be selfish for one time in my fucking life and ask you to give me a chance. I can guarantee that I’m going to piss you off and probably hurt your feelings again, but it will never be intentional. So, what do you say? You want to give us a shot?” He poured his heart out to her, leaning his forehead against hers as he waited for an answer. 

“Dean, contrary to what you believe, you are a good man. You love with your whole being and fiercely protect those lucky enough to get that love. I know you don’t believe you deserve it, but you deserve the world, Dean Winchester, and I’d be honored to be the one to try and give it to you.” 

“Really?” he asked with a million-watt smile, leaning back to look her in the eye. 

“I’ve never wanted anything more,” she returned his smile, both sighing in relief. 

“Come here,” he growled, pulling her face to his and kissing her passionately. 

The kiss was better than either had imagined, and they both poured the love they felt for the other into it. They stayed that way until the need to breathe became too much, pulling away with smiles. He pulled her into a hug, laying his head on top of hers. They stayed silent for a few minutes before Dean broke the silence. 

“So, you want to move your stuff into my room when we get back? 

“I don’t know, Dean,” she pulled back, chewing on her bottom lip, “I really think we need to take this as slowly as possible. Make sure that we’re going to last.” 

“Oh, yeah, okay,” he agreed, his heart clenching at the hurt he felt. 

“I’m just joking,” she laughed, poking him in the ribs, “You’re not going to get rid of me now!” 

“Damn it, Y/N! That wasn’t funny! You almost gave me a heart attack,” he grumbled, not finding her joke all that funny. 

“I think I’m hilarious,” she smirked up at him. 

“You’re something, alright. Now, how about we both try to get some rest? We have a lot of packing to do when we get home,” he suggested, leading her toward the bedroom, “You have a lot of shit. I don’t know where we’re going to put it all.” 

“Ha ha,” she deadpanned, “Well, we could always get rid of your vinyl collection to make room.” 

“Hey! Those are fighting words,” he growled playfully, leaning down to nip at her bottom lip. 

“Bring it on, old man,” she cackled as his eyes shot up his forehead in shock. 

“I’ll show you an old man!” he said in faux anger, chasing her into the bedroom. 

All that could be heard as the bedroom door shut was the laughter and playful banter between the new couple, and that’s how it stayed for the years to come.

@flamencodiva​ @foxyjwls007​ @emoryhemsworth​ ​​ @valsworldofcreativity​​ @hardcoresupernaturalfans​​

@msmarvelouswinchester @lyarr24​​ ​​ @ellewritesfix05​​ @defenderrosetyler​​

@hobby27 ​​ ​​ @supernatural-love14 @vicmc624​​ @squirrelnotsam​​ @tatted-trina6 ​​ @xhannahbananax03 @coffeebooksandfandom​​ ​ @deans-baby-momma​​ @lovelyrocker​​ @fablesrose

​​ @maralisa124​​ @wayward-dreamer​​ @aimee-ginge​​ ​​ @donnaintx​​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​​

@itsdesiree86​​ @kyjey @roxytheimmortal​​ @briagallen @aubageddon91​​

@stoneyggirl2l​​ @kitkatd7​​ ​​ @brilovesdeanwinchester​​ @allonsy-yesiwill​ @krazykelly​​

@440mxs-wife​​ @rebelemilu​​ @sarahbaker2010​​ @tyferbebe​​ @metalfangirl​

@redbarn1995​​ @thoughts-and-funnies​​ @izzathequeen @heavensangel45135​​ @entersand-man​​ ​

@supraveng ​​ @hintsofhoney​ @bobbie3939​​ @waynes-multiverse @katelyn--renee​​

@thinkinghardhardlythinking​​ @makeadealwithdean ​​ @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @pink-sparkly-witch​​

@samsgirl93​​ ​ @maliburenee @thelastpyle​​ @nancymcl​​ @marvelouslyme96​​

@muhahaha303​ @maggiegirl17​ @slamminmine​ @ladysparkles78 @deanwinchestersgirl27 ​

[piggyinthemiddle]

🐷 'Gaining' Diaries with Porky 🐷

Hi, I felt like writing again. It's been a while. :D

This might not be a usual gaining diary as you're used to. Over the past few months I didn't manage to get as big as I wanted to be, mainly due to stress, getting sick and simply not having the time to eat and lay and stuff as much as I need to. But now being with an encouraging and enabling partner, I can feel the pounds being added to my belly again and it's amazing- anyways.

I didn't realise until now how hard it can be to grow visibly fatter at a certain size. Can see the number on the scales get higher but I feel like my gut and rolls remain the same, it's frustrating. However many of you and my partner keep telling me that I'm "obviously fatter than a month ago" and all that so maybe I'm just getting blind to it? God knows.

Does this happen to any of you? Am I going a bit crazy? 😂

________

As for the actual gaining progress, as I said it's kind of stuck around the 400lbs mark at the moment. I didn't lose weight, nor did I gain a lot unfortunately. I maintained for a while. What I can say is that my belly felt less bloated and stretched out as it did when I was really pushing my limits. My stretchmarks calmed down a little bit, my lower belly felt heavy, yet more "settled" and squishy.

I started stuffing again a few days ago and I've been struggling to move properly ever since, needed to get used to the tightness again. I keep the belly on full display for my partner to enjoy when they're around and I've never felt so proud of being such a fat pig before tbh, having someone to impress with it feels so good.

Apart from that many wondered how they feel about my being this fat and getting bigger without intentions to stop: They're enjoying it. They're treating me to dinners, they enjoy patting and jiggling my belly and they keep making comments about the road ahead. Just today we planned out a trip for tomorrow and they went "We should go to (location), I want us to see it before you're too fat" so trust me, they're fully on board and enjoy it. They're aware of me becoming immobile at some point and if they weren't into it, I doubt they'd still be here and watch and even help fattening me up until I am. 🐷

Also can we quickly appreciate the size of my hand compared to my rolls real quick because this snapchat picture is just 👌✨️🐖

Honestly still can't get over that this is actually my body now. Just typing that is exciting. Some of you who I've chatted with were wondering if I ever regret getting this big and I understand the concern but.. guys I'm so happy? I always looked up to the gainers and fat people on YT and all, I never thought I'd ever get there and now look at me. 😌 Such a big pile of lard. No regrets. None.

I doubt anyone even reads the entire thing but some times I just love writing about this, anyways have a good day byeeee porky out 🐷🫶 also add me on snap because half of the stuff never makes it to tumblr okay that's it

Snapchat: porkysnap2022

[lukolabrainrot]

I am going to talk about some of my thoughts about why I believe N's behavior changed as the PR tour progressed. I am also going to talk about my thoughts on if L&N ever got "jiggy with it" 😂 I'll try to get to my thoughts on Toronto and Ireland tomorrow.

Before I start though, I want to mention that I am trying to come to my theories/opinions based off of things I have been able to observe, and verified information online. Obviously though, I don't actually know any of these people irl, so I am never going to understand the full story of what is going on between L/N. All of this is just my thoughts and theories on what is going on based on what has been put out to the public. There has been a lot of speculation online about everything, but I am going to try and not give that information too much weight when coming to my conclusions here. I am interested in hearing everyone's thoughts/opinions though, since this story has a lot of moving parts. Just wanted to put this disclaimer out before moving forward with more of my thoughts/theories.

Alright, on to the main course (this is going to be a LONG post btw)...

N on the PR Tour

I want to start off with the following that we know to be fact about N:

She is INCREDIBLY private about her personal life, especially her dating/romantic life (the same isn't/hasn't really been true about L). In fact, I don't believe N has ever publicly come out as being in a relationship with anyone since she entered the entertainment industry/been in the public eye (although I can't 100% confirm this, so please let me know if there are any articles/or something on her SM where she has publicly confirmed she was in a relationship at some point)

She is VERY online, and very careful about controlling her public narrative

She is a naturally touchy and affectionate person with people, but she seems to hold her true feelings a lot closer to her heart, and it seems to me, that she is kind of "on" in public (which is actually an important skillset to have as someone in the entertainment industry because you really need to know how to stay in control of your public narrative--your fans are your livelihood)

She LOVES photography/taking photos (it is one of her love languages I believe)

Now as I mentioned, L was always a lot more of an open book on the PR tour about his feelings for N (refer to my post here). N seemed to be a lot more reserved/gaurded during the tour when it first started in January, but everything shifted in like April when the world tour started. Below are my thoughts:

N started to become a LOT more obvious through her nonverbal cues about her genuine feelings for L as the tour unfolded. I will say that I believe PART of it probably had to do with getting a little "lost in the sauce" with the energy of the tour. However, I think the larger factor was that L & N were pushed together for many months (in close quarters), and were therefore forced to have conversations about their feelings for each other that I think they had been tiptoeing around for quite a while. From what we then saw from like the middle of Italy (I'm an Italy truther), there was more of a confidence, security, and contentment in how they interacted with each other that signaled to me feelings were shared and reciprocated.

Like I mentioned, she is a PR queen and very, very private about this part of her life. Therefore, why would she decide to be so obvious about her feelings on such a public stage when she knows people analyze everything? Well... I believe this is her way of publicly acknowledging their romantic feelings for each other without ACTUALLY publicly acknowledging anything more than "work besties" is going on with them. Which totally makes sense when you think about it because 1) The fandom would LOSE IT rn 2) That would put a LOT of public pressure on them, and I think these feelings they have shared with each other are very new (but had been brewing for a long time), and I don't think they are confident enough to go public. There is also, of course, the A of the whole situation, which L needs to figure out how he wants to move forward with that. TLDR, the situation is very messy, and I think there is a lot that L/N need to process in private regarding each other out of the public eye. I am pretty confident though that this tour put them in a situation to confront, clarify, and establish what their romantic feelings are for each other outside of the show (and they were reciprocated), and they are taking the space right now to explore that privately.    

Lastly, because I really like analyzing photos and N loves taking pictures, let's talk about those "boyfriend pics" of L she posted since the world tour started. Yes, she was promoting the show, but a lot of those pictures (especially recently) have a very specific vibe. She wants the world to see him the way she sees him. She loves that man, clear and simple. He shines around her, and she knows that. I think it’s also especially telling that she posted the most recent boyfriend pic of her last day of filming (which was the most obvious one in my opinion) now that A is publicly connected to L. It was a statement in my opinion, that regardless of all the drama unfolding, her and L have a really deep and meaningful connection that is special to her. I think it also served as a message that we don’t know the full story, which I think is a positive thing for us Lukola fans. Now I can’t predict the future with these two, but I am fairly certain we wouldn’t have been seeing the type of behavior we saw from them on the PR tour, and the types of photos she has been posting of him lately, if they weren’t confident in moving forward with their romantic relationship in the near future (especially since A has been in the picture for quite some time). I think these pics serve as another crumb that they are a little more than just work besties.

One last note, I think the reason our PR queen started slipping up and changing her answers to certain questions on the tour is because SHE WAS REALLY HAPPY WITH HIM. This can be a whole separate post at some point if people are interested, but I am almost certain from everything I have observed regarding N, that she is quite jaded when it comes to finding a romantic partner, and has been hurt in romantic relationships in the past.  I feel like L is the more sweet, hopeless romantic between the two. I think he allowed her to heal some of her relationship wounds. I think there is something about L and the experiences they’ve shared together that has reignited something within N to make her feel more hopeful about having a deep romantic connection while she can still be very independent and successful in her field. And I think it specifically has something to do with who L is when he is with her and how he treats her. I get the impression he has really altered the way she sees certain things related to romantic relationships. My whole point is that I think they both know what they have, and they know that if they can get on the same page, this relationship would get serious pretty quickly. Therefore, even though N is really private with this part of her life, for L, I think she would publicly acknowledge their relationship, but only when/if they are able to get to a point where they feel confident enough that their relationship would be able to withstand the pressures from the public. They just aren't there currently because of all the other confounding factors, but I don't think that necessarily signals where they will be in like 6 to 8 months imo...

Have L/N ever gotten freaky deaky irl?

From before the PR tour, I just don't have enough information to confidently say yes or no. A lot of people have different opinions on this, and some people think they casually dated near the end of filming season 3/sometime last year (but we don't have any proof of that). This is what I will say:

N still follows J (and vice versa I believe, please lmk if I'm wrong?), so I don't think there is any bad blood there. This makes me pretty certain that L/N never acted on any physical feelings for each other until after that relationship was completely over. I do think though that L/N have had a spark for a while (and tbh, I think L has kind of had a thing for N since they met, and his feelings for her have always been stronger). Therefore, this likely played a part in him emotionally distancing from his relationship with J when season 3 started filming, but at the end of the day, we will never know the specicifics of why they decided to part ways. My guess is that there were a lot of reasons that relationship did not end up working out considering how serious that relationship was.

Considering how WILD L/N's sexual chemistry is, it wouldn't surprise me if they hooked up at some point before the PR tour. But considering L was on Raya by February/March 2023 (from my understanding?), and the fact that N was SUPER busy last year and traveling a bunch, I just don't think there was any time for them to have anything more than something super casual/no commitment (if anything). Even if they did maybe hook up some, I don't think they really directly addressed the depth of their feelings for each other, which is why we saw all that behavior between them on the tour, because I don't think any clear boundaries had been put up and their feelings came flooding back.

Now I feel a lot more confident that somethingggg intimate happened at least once between them on the PR tour. Here are my theories:

I don't think things were great between them at the beginning of the tour (like January) because feelings I think started popping up again for these two during the reshoots in December 2023, and then the NYE kiss comes out, and N and L are feeling disconnected and aren't really on the same page about the tour.

I think they had some conversations in private, because by the VDay event, they seemed a lot more on the same page (and L was giving N those total heart eyes). The extra layer is that (I believe?) A accompanied L to the city the event was in (I think NYC?), but even though A was staying with him, L was STILL looking at N like THAT during the event (which I think speaks VOLUMES).

I think though there were a lot of things they still weren't talking about, and everything came to a head when they got to Italy, which is why the vibes were off at first and it seemed like there was tension between them. This also occurred soon after the Instyle stunt, so I feel like N probably had some feelingssss about that.

I have recently been converted to an Italy truther, so I believe that Italy was where L/N finally addressed/readressed some of their feelings for each other, and N was trying to get some clarity on WTH was going on with A, and making sure it wasn't going to mess anything up with the tour. But I think they "kissed and made up" 😉 and got back on the same page. Which is why there was the shift in Italy, and why we saw what we saw for the rest of the tour.

Not sure exactly what happened of course, but I get the feeling something physical happened after they started having some BIG conversations about each other that they had needed to have for a long time (and I think they continued to have these conversations with each other as the tour progressed). Let's also remember that these are two very non-confrontational people, so I feel like there must have been a LOT of pent up feelings/emotions for them to publicly show that they weren't super happy with each other/beefing during the beginning of Italy.

I also definitely think they physically acted on their feelings in Brazil (like they just had the "glow" imo 😂). And the eff me eyes, c'mon. Like Brazil continually reminded me of that New Girl quote "The stench of filth and lust is all over this room." It just seemed pretty obvious to me 😂 Especially considering the events that transpired right after that with A, and between L/N for the rest of the tour.

Lastly, I know a lot of people believe that L/N didn't physically act on their feelings because the tension would go away. However, I actually think it's a good sign that tension is still there, because I think it shows that there is a pretty deep connection between these two, and they are still feeling that pull/sexual energy after having sex. They kind of remind me of like two friends in a friend group who just admitted their true feelings for each other but aren't ready to go public, but are also having crazy good sex, so they are super obvious and can't really hide it when they are together LOL Regardless if they had ever physically acted on their feelings before the tour, I think these experiences (IF they did indeed occur), helped L/N get clarity if their strong feelings and attraction for each other went past the show and their characters. And I personally think they got that clarity 😉

Wowww okay that turned into an essay LOL, but I think the TLDR is that the situation seems very complicated right now, and I think there is a lot that L/N are needing to figure out in private. But I don't think that negates or invalidates what we saw between them on the PR tour, or that they were "faking" their feelings. Human beings are messy and imperfect, and that is okay. I think the part that still really confuses me is the whole A of the situation, because I just can't wrap my head around it. I would love to hear other people's opinions though on how she factors into all this, so if you have theories/questions you would like to add to that discussion, drop them in my asks. Because I have thoughtssss 😂

[fallenneziah]

If you are excepting requests? May I request a ghost x reader where he sees reader working out and at first he thinks she’s doing it because she wants( he lowkey doesnt want her to lose the weight, 🩷he likes her chubby :((( )but then she just stops eating and doing things she normally does because she’s insecure and he just comforts her. kinda long but only if u wanna do it🫶🏼🫶🏼 feel free to change some thingsss

Aww, thank you anon. Requests are open, I'll happily write for you guys (please send me stuff 😅😂)

Beauty standards.

Cw: unhealthy weight loss, unhealthy coping mechanisms, eating disorder (in standard), Ghost taking care of you. Just fluffy.

Ghost is absolutely enamored by you. As a 6'4 man with muscles for miles, he absolutely adores you to be somewhat opposite of him.

There's just something about your soft tummy and despite how much you workout and how strong you get you never lose that soft plush to your skin that makes him want to pick you up and cradle you for hours.

There was something about your warm thighs. He loved holding them. He loved when you sat on his lap and he could pull your thighs in and squeeze the soft skin in his calloused hand.

What he would give to feel your tummy in his hands, sleeping with his head on your chest and your hands on his skin.

Your body is everything to him. He would love it, kiss it, and worship it every day. He just thinks you're absolutely beautiful.

But lately you haven't been feeling as excited about your body as he is. You'd promised yourself you would stop going on Instagram just to split compare yourself so much to the obvious filtered oblivion that were the supposed supermodels. And you promised you wouldn't let any of it get to you.

You were chubby, and sometimes being labelled as simply cute hit a little nerve inside you. Especially in military.

Slowly falling back down that hole. First staring to with a random weight suggestion board that had been cycling around. You decided to try it, and soon exercise took up a huge chunk of your day. More than it usually did.

Grabbing a half a bite of breakfast to leave for your ass crack of dawn morning run followed up by the crazy workout routine you'd been suggested.

At first Simon commented on the stride and how he was impressed you were stepping up. Under the impression you were taking care of your body's needs.

But it only got worse. Until you felt no change in the workout routine and simply decided you would just stop eating.

You had to get thinner somehow and you wouldn't stop until you could confidently post a picture looking like one of the Karcrashions.

You skipped out on meals and simply gave the excuse of being tired and that you'd get food later. But this only flew for so long. How you thought you'd get away with it with the others let alone your own boyfriend was a wonder.

Once again, laying in your bed after rejecting dinner, hearing the door open. You recognized the heavy footsteps as he approached, kneeling onto the bed.

"Hey Simon..."

Simon hummed, his arms wrapping around you, pushing the blanket back and laying down behind you, kissing your neck.

"Tell me what's wrong." He whispers, pressing another soft kiss behind your ear.

"I'm fine baby, I'm just not feeling hungry."

Simon kisses your nape again. "You're never hungry anymore..."

"Just on a new diet..." You mumbled, wanting to tell him and wanting to hide at the same time. Simon squeezed you gently, his hand splaying across your stomach. His kisses slowly stop and he lays his head there, just listening.

The moment of silence passed before you finally managed out. "I feel Hideous..."

Simon shifts slowly. "Why? What makes you feel... Hideous."

You roll onto your back, giving him a firm look. "You know exactly what. Look at me... No matter what I do I can't get rid of this stupid fat!"

Simon remained silent, nodding a little. His heart sank. Simon understood what it meant to hate yourself. He still remembers the time when he felt like he would rather die than live in his body.

But he loved your body. He could never see you as hideous.

"What? You mean your stomach?" He gently rubbed the plump area. You scoffed though. "It's everything. My thighs, my arms, my stomach..."

Simon looked you up and down, effortlessly lifting you up. He kneeled in front of you, gently wiping a tear before it could fall far.

"Fuck what anyone else says. Fuck it." He leans forward, wrapping his arms around your waist and gently kissing your thighs.

"I love every inch of you." He whispered. "The world can burn before I give one fuck about what they say about you."

You sniffled and grimaced. "I hate it... I wish I was skinny."

Simon looked up at you. "Sweetheart, you're beautiful. You're perfectly healthy. What woman wants a bloke with abs and no fluff. Like sleeping on a goddamn xylophone." He gently kissed your stomach, holding your thighs.

"Everyone likes a little bit of fluff."

"I know I do."

He stood and swept you up again, making you gasp and grip onto him, legs curling around him. He played back down on the bed and postures you on top of him.

"No woman's stomach is completely flat, thigh gap? I couldn't give less of a fuck. All I care about is that you're still healthy, and ultimately, you're happy."

Your eyes brimmed with more tears, sniffling. "You don't... Think I'm ugly?"

Simon leaned up, sliding you down into his lap. He wrapped your legs around his torso and kissed you softly. "Not a day since I met you."

A lot of times, seeing your body in a positive light is a hard thing. Even with people around you who encouraged your proportions. Simon knew this. He knew he could help, he could love you and reassure you that he wasn't here just because of your body.

He loves his fluffy princess 😊.

[hitomisuzuya]

Self aware! Aventurine x fem!reader. Yandere! Aventurine cause why not. Something for giggles at the end.

No smut guys. This is just me being silly, and self indulgent cause Aventurine evaded me. It stings, ngl so this is more to make myself feel better😂 Pay zero attention to this nonsense omg 😂

Aventurine could instantly feel the sadness caused by the crushing weight of life through your hands the moment you played his character demo. He knew what that was like, so to be nice and so you could shut your brain off for awhile, no damage was taken at all from enemies.

Oh, but what's this? You started playing this game just for him. There were 5 days left for him to "come home", but sweetheart, it was an unrealistic gamble. You were still very wet behind the ears. Trailblaze level 39 and barely even aware of your own abilities to play the game.

Aventurine could definitely feel how scared you were observing you struggle and ultimately triumph over certain tasks once you got a feel for it down. It took you a lot of nerve to even play. He would hear you think, "I hate messing up and not doing things right the first time."

Dedication squeezed at your heart. Made you lose sleep. Dedication all for him.

Please quiet your pounding heart, darling. You have a better grasp than you think. It was quite frankly amazing to see.

It was both amusing and endearing to see you soak up information like a sponge. Only to have you try and pull when you had a comfortable amount of currency.

As the days went by, and your time window got closer to slamming shut until the next opportunity, he supposed that it was a good thing Dr. Ratio was helping you out.

Supposed, anyways

You were starting to cheer for Ratio when he started to crit high. That was starting to irk him, but the rush of fulfillment he felt through you when you cleared something made it worth it.

After all, you were doing all this for him. Aventurine was only able to feel your emotions because he is was always on your mind every second you played. Even after logging off.

You are his, damn it. That was that. There really wasn't anyone else you needed. He craved to spoil you.

Of course, he had his own ways of keeping tabs on you. Dr. Ratio was starting to be more use to him that he thought.

Aventurine truly hated shutting you down, especially when he felt your heart sting and a few tears well into your eyes. You held your head high and soldiered right on, brushing them away from your eyes with your delicate hand before they even fell.

He wanted you flourish first. He wanted you to have 10000% confidence. He knew he could've just come home and did everything for you, but he wanted to fight by your side as well as fight for you. He wanted you set up the party with him in it and think with a smile, "I can do this. I know I am capable. And I have you, Aventurine. Nothing can go wrong."

It was a pleasure for him to watch you. Especially in the Simulated Universe, and the Critter Pick quest. How you smiled and giggled at the cat cakes. You cooed at them. Even lamented about not having something like them in another game.

When that time finally came, and it would, don't you worry your pretty little head. He already knew your dedication level was incredibly high, and there would be extra insurance provided by both you and him.

Aventurine realized that you were irrevocably, totally, and completely dizzy in love with him. The words in your head exactly. They made his heart skip beats.

When he realized he was in love with you, it was during the end of Critter Pick mission. It snuck up on him, and slapped him hard in the face. It was when you were facing down the Swarm for the final Curio.

You loathed The Juvenile Sting and Lesser Sting from the Swarm in particular. You'd retreated over and over, getting intimidated when they multiplied. Until one night, you'd narrowed your eyes in determination and said, "Okay, you fucking bugs. Let's go. I won't be bullied by you today. I will do this for the sake of the cat cakes."

You dug your heels in, and didn't run. You wanted to do many times. You were already terribly fragile with your confidence to begin with. He watched you so close, and the surge of pride he felt when he saw you refused to yield in the end was undescribable.

"That's my girl," He'd murmured when the final bug exploded. Ratio may have taken care of you, and he was glad for that. Aventurine knew he would've been better for you.

Until that day when he could come for you, darling, he was still going to be there. Hovering patiently unseen. Maybe your shields around your characters would last a little longer in tight spots. Maybe a mysterious extra skill point would appear that you thought you didn't have. Maybe, just for you, Ratio would have an extra follow up attack.

And okay maybe sometimes when you had to pause battle for whatever reason, Ratio would get downed mysteriously now and then. He really, really was starting to hate that you relied on him so much.

Aventurine sought out a certain master hacker to put traces on your phone. That would was the only way to keep you close off game. Perhaps he would find a way to just come to you. And poof, you would disappear from your world and go with him.

He felt much better knowing where you were, and what you were doing when he so desired. He lived for when he could hear you say his name outloud. It sounded so sweet to him to even hear you think it.

It was ideal, really.

And just who was Scaramouche anyways? He was immediately shut down with such a spine chilling shock when he tried to investigate.

[thedivinetarot]

I'm so sorry for your loss

How does he feel after you blocked him?

☆How to chose the perfect pile for you?

1) Close your eyes.

2) Clear your mind (don't think of anything or anyone).

3) take a deep breathe.

4) Ask the question in your head.

5) Open your eyes, and the picture that you are drawn to the most is your pile.

☆Note:

- Thank you guys for 200 followers, we are growing so fast. I'm grateful to have you guys❤.

- In this reading we are going to reveal how your specific person feel when you blocked them and went no contact with them.

- This reading is for entertainment purposes only. Nothing is set in stone.

Stay safe

Arya❤

Pile 1 - Spell book

How is you current energy?

Pile one are you trying to lose weight for a wedding but obviously it is not working out? I see that you may be on a diet to lose the extra weight and to fit in that beautiful dress you bought but obviously you either not seeing any results or you are not taking the diet seriously. You may be falling at losing this weight. Anyways as a nutrition student I advise you to lower the carb intake but never cut it from your diet. And always remember that you ARE wearing the dress and NOT the dress wearing you. That's a thing, also I see that there's someone who is shaming you for gaining that weight. He might be a man from your family or a man you know? Don't listen to them pile 1. Losing weight needs effort, consistency and finally a lot of patience. You can't lose all that weight in a week or a month! Be patient. I see that this pile is so desperate to lose the weight and they are putting too much pressure on themselves to reach that goal. And if you are not trying to lose the weight. You might be working on a project with someone and that project caused you two to lose your money and now I see that it is going to be a short term money loss. Don't freak out pile one money come and go. You can always ask for help, ask someone to lend you some money. You'll repay them one day when they need it. Another thing I'm picking up on is that this pile are facing financial trouble because of a wedding? You might put too much money and effort into it that now you have a problem with finances?. Okay, the dominant energy on this pile are earth signs (Virgo, Taurus and Capricorn) you might have those placements in your chart or just the dominant element (earth) or dominant planet (Venus, Mercury or Saturn).

Now how does he feel after you blocked him?

So, looking at the cards in front of me this person might have been manipulating you emotionally. The cards also are telling me that he is untrustworthy. So please pile 1 don't fall into that trap again. Do not unblock him. I see that after you blocked him he might got it as a sign to move on from this connection. I see that he is taking his attention and dumping it on someone else. He might be a cancer with gemini placements? Be careful those type of men especially with those placements are super manipulative even if they subconsciously do it. I see that he is asking someone to reach out to you just to know how you are doing. This person is literally a border line psycho😂 I can't. Like he act like he is fine and cool without you but he is still watching your social media or taking the tea on you from a friend of yours or a friend of a friend. Anyways, I see that he is addicted to you. Like even your name make him tremble? I don't know why I got this feeling. He might also was dependent on you emotionally? Like he have dumped all his emotions and trauma into you? Pile 1 dear, he is not worthy of that and our job is not to fix those men. He is like in between two states 1) I should let her go because it is over and the other state is 2) but we could've been good together, there's still things I want to experience with her. Anyways, I see manipulation for some reason. He might manipulated you into thinking something about him that is not exactly the truth. I see that he is being childish of his needs and wants. He is like that baby who want to have his cake and eat it too. You see that person who says that he want a specific type of women but the thought of spending the rest of his life with them terrifies him? You might have his lilith in your sun sign. He is incredibly attracted but afraid of being with you.

Thank you for reading this pile 1. Take care and stay safe❤.

Pile 2 - The burning heart

How is your current energy?

Pile two are you walking away from a friend group? I see that you either walking away from a friend group or leaving an online community. That community might be toxic and it left you unbalanced and insecure? You might have lied to yourself that this community or people are going to make you happy but in fact they made you feel insecure and more triggered? You might be someone who was obsessed of looking like a model or like those IG girls but for some reason as you progressed in that group you started comparing yourself and your life to them? I see you conflicting between you and your inner world and vision but acting happy and positive in front of people. You might also got scammed by them? I see that they were promoting a product that should solve all your problems like magic but then you realize it was a scam? That product may destroyed your skin or gave you breakouts. This pile have water placements (Cancer, Scorpio and pisces) and earth placements (capricorn, virgo and taurus).

How does he feel after you blocked him?

Well, this group is hilarious 😂. I think he didn't know that you blocked him so he kept double texting you and there was no reply so he felt like he f up. I see that if this person is living in the same place as you or the same city he might actually take action to come in and see you. And if not then he felt incredibly confused and insecure. I feel like he might be the type of person that if he faced rejection or a block he let all his previous trauma resurface again and blame himself without actually changing. But hey, let's be honest those men demand you to change but he is literally rotten in his own self with his bad habits and emotional immaturity. I see that this person was eager to know you. Have you dated him pile 2? I don't see anything serious to be honest. It looks like a date or a hookup but not really a serious lover or a partner. He feels so insecure and not stable. He perhaps, wanted to give this connection a shot but was surprised by getting blocked? Lol. I can't it is so funny. Sorry pile 2, I think you should clarify things with him. Wait I will pull a couple of cards to see his energy. He might be a young adult, possibly between 20 and 29? I see that he tried to achieve success multiple times but that didn't really happen. He might opened or worked a series of jobs or businesses/projects but none of them worked. I see that he lied about being happy away from you but he is not. He really wanted this partnership he is so serious omg. Well, I think it is up to you if you want to pursue anything further with him but he is broke sooo it is up to you pile 2, if you want to keep in touch with him or unblock him. I don't know why I keep picturing a black man with braids. He might like wearing white clothes.

Thank you for reading pile 2, stay safe and take care ❤.

Pile 3 - Love magic book

How is your current energy?

I see that this pile are finally seeing the fruits of their labor. I see that pile 3 have been doing alot of inner work and practicing self care. I see that you guys might have realized the old patterns that kept you stuck. I see a lot of inner transformation. You may finally broke free from abusive partner/family or friendships. I see that the chapter you are closing made you insecure about moving on with your life. You may be scared and terrified to take action in your current circumstances. The cards are telling me you don't have the courage yet to approach life in a more optimistic way. I see that this pile are being faced with many decisions to make and there's a lot of opportunities that will give you the abundance you need. I see that this pile are not afraid to face their inner demons. Like as I mentioned above, you might started going to therapy or doing shadow work to deal with the darker side of yourself. This pile’s energy is so internal. I don't see you doing anything to be specific, I see you doing the mundane and being afraid to take higher risks. Guys I felt anxious all of sudden. Have you been dealing with anxiety? If you might be then I asked the cards on how to deal with it and they told me that you need to live in the present moment. Stop living in the future, what will happen will happen and you have no control over the outcome. The cards are encouraging you to embrace the moment and enjoy the blessings from the universe. I see that this pile will have an opportunity to improve their life. I see a job opportunity coming in for you and it will make you so happy. Guys I think life is not that serious so please don't overthink the stuff that you cannot control. Okay? Live your life guys. Anyways, I see a strong uranus and pluto energy. You might have those two planets dominant in your chart or you might be an aquarius, cancer or scorpio. That's what I'm picking up on. You don't have to have those placements if the description fit you correctly.

How does he feel after you blocked him?

I see that your person is practical and stubborn. He might be an aquarius, capricorn or have his sun in the 10th or 11th house in his chart. This person is refusing letting you go. The cards are all pointing to the opposite direction, I see that this person is so attached to you like a puppy. This person is boiling inside, his blood is on fire. I feel like he is feeling stuck and frustrated. He might have a lot of female friends or have a lot of sisters or female siblings. Whatever the case he is asking them to help him of his situation or just spending time with them to get over you. I think that he think what is between you two is not done or finished. He is so fixated on you. I feel like after you left he got depressed and sad. I feel like I'm losing hope. This person keeps himself dissociated by imagination. He keep imagining you two together. He didn't expect you to block him. I don't really see any movement, he is not moving at all. And if you are asking about him taking action towards you I don't see that happening honestly. He is just trapped in his head. He might have an IXXJ mbti (ISTJ,ISFJ, INTJ, INFJ)?. This person is not happy of how things are he is still thinking about you. I heard the phrase "you never left my mind/ imagination". I see that instead of healing and moving on he is distracting himself even more.

Pile 4 - The 3 of swords card

How is your current energy?

Honey why are sad? He doesn't deserve it. I feel like this pile is disappointed by someone they felt a connection with. This person might crossed your boundaries and even was rude to you. I don't really feel like you know this person well, like you see when we meet someone briefly and they leave quite a strong impression on us. I see that you expect this person to treat you in a way and unfortunately you got disappointed. I see that this person did not respect your privacy or personal space. I feel like you might have problem socializing with other? Or social anxiety? And that person was the last straw? Anyways give yourself some time to heal from that and move on. I feel like this pile are trying to be more courageous but they are overthinking and scared. You might be someone who do not trust others and feel so overwhelmed by people. I pulled a card for advice and they are telling you to step into your power, they are telling me that you are strong pile 4. You have this duality to you and if it is not about duality then you can switch masculine and feminine energy within you quite easily. Also trust your intuition. I feel like you have a female figure in your life who is very spiritual and connected to earth. Ask her for help and she will gladly help you. This is your pile if you have leo placements or fire placements in general. I see mars as a dominant planet too. So take what resonates.

How does he feel after you blocked him?

Well, I have two scenario cases in my head. The cards are telling me that he already moved on when you blocked him. He might have had a crush on someone so it was easy for him to move into that. I see that he still watch your social media but BUUT out of curiosity not love or because he want you back. The other case scenario is; he might be working on himself to manifest you. I see that this person is so patient and calculated. He might have other life responsibilities, this person might be old like between 25 and 35. I'm not getting any teenage vibes from this group. What he felt when you blocked him was anxiety and longing? You see those psycho people who do not understand themselves? So they confuse others? He might felt like it is time to move on emotionally but mentally he sometimes long and think about you. He doesn't really understand his emotions. He keeps them to himself. This person is done I'm not seeing any movement but what I do see is thinking deeply about you and unfortunately; his thoughts are manifesting or reaching you. He might send you messages telepathically? I don't know if you believe in telepathy, but after all it is physics and spirituality. I mean our thoughts are patterns and they have vibrations and frequencies so yes it can move from one person to another. If this person keep popping on your mind then he is manifesting you.

Thank you for reading this pile 4. Stay safe❤.

Post date: 31st/Aug/2024- Sat

*Feedback is appreciated

[inthehouseoffinwe]

What do you think would’ve happened if instead of the three Cs, Maedhros and Maglor had been the ones to fight Dior?

I mean we know they’re much more skilled and less bloodthirsty and rash than the rest of their brothers. So here’s an AU:

I think we’d see Mae and Mags come out on top, and assuming they’re out of the main hall, the rest of their brothers would probably make it out of Doriath alive. Elured and Elurin make it out with Elwing.

With all seven still around and watching each other’s backs, I imagine Sirion would be much the same, all all them surviving. The addition of Elwing’s brothers and their soldiers turning on them, *might* turn the tables just enough to kill a couple of Fëanorions, probably Celegorm and Curufin who are still bitter about Luthien and Dior. But I feel it’s more likely due to inexperience, Elured and Elurin are killed, not necessarily by the Fëanorions themselves.

The silmaril ends up with Elwing and we get the same situation of Maedhros and Maglor asking for it back and Elwing throwing herself off the cliff. Mae and Mags genuinely do not want to be here but the letters were refused and the Oath calls. Elwing probably knows her brothers were killed by word of mouth or seeing it herself and legged it.

Enter Elrond and Elros who’d have a more interesting (and fun) time of things with 5-7 sons of Fëanor around. Maedhros would back Maglor on caring for the twins though, less consumed by the oath with all his little brothers alive and kicking. And in canon he did go searching for Dior’s sons. Caranthir probably doesn’t really have an opinion on them, Amrod and Amras are willing to follow their brothers’ lead on things (also when are they ever gonna have a chance to see identical twins again. I think they’d get along pretty well.) I don’t see any of them being particularly hateful towards the kids. Celegorm and Curufin seem to be most susceptible to the Oath and giving in to their nastier sides might be a bit more of a problem, but there’s enough brothers to keep an eye on them. And I think they’d warm up eventually, reluctantly though it may be. Curufin was a father first, remember, it’s more natural for him to care than not.

Safe to say by the time Elrond and Elros go to Gil Galad, they’re very well trained in all manner of things 😂

As for the fate of the Fëanorions, they wouldn’t go for the last ditch attempt Mae and Mags did. From the eldest’s perspective, there’s too much to lose. I want to say the stones might be passed off to them, if only to prove a point, and whoever picks them up would no doubt be burned, but there’s no suicides. There’s no endless lamentation.

In reality though there’s probably still a battle by the chest, the oath awakened and clawing with the stones so close. There might be more of a push to bring them back to Valinor to stand trial, but they’re a force to be reckoned with and Eönwë knows they’d rather die than be dragged back. The Fëanorions are let go with the stones, but instead of being tossed away as the Valar expect, the chest is kept and they go on.

With the oath mostly fulfilled much of the weight across their fëa is gone, and Curufin and Celegorm head out to keep an eye on Celebrimbor. Elros might have a temporary tagalong in Maedhros and Caranthir (new kingdom needs someone with experience to get the economy up and running.) Maglor and both Ambarussa keep their distant eye on Elrond.

(Annatar didn’t expect the seven biggest pains in his Master’s back to greet him at Eregion’s gate, two Silmarils in tow, burning him to the core. Celebrimbor doesn’t know whether to be horrified or thankful. Back in Lindon, Elrond - the one who tipped them off - is cackling and Gil Galad is Concerned TM but decides he’s better off not knowing. His cousins are insane on the best of days.)

Alternatively, Elured and Elurin perhaps remembering how reluctant Maedhros and Maglor were, how Maedhros pleaded with their father to just return the stone so this could all *end*, immediately send the silmaril back when the letter comes. Or maybe they’re just cooler headed and see the logic of returning the stone. Things settle. The Valar do eventually get involved. Silmaril two and three are regained then reclaimed by the brothers as mentioned above. They might burn. They might reject the holders. But the oath is fulfilled and that’s all that matters in the end.

[readychilledwine]

Beauty in Pain Pt 2

Summary - Losing your wings may have been the best thing to ever happen to you

Warnings- mentions of trauma, mentions of therapy, blood, normal happy marriage discussions

A/N - I kept this short and sweet (1000 words) as a kind of like closure moment for those of us who wanted and needed it. ❤️ Also part 2 of the Death of Peace of Mind is still going up tonight. I just didn't want to give you all whiplash since that Eris is so different from drabble Eris 😂

You would never get used to waking up on your back. It was never possible before the incident. You had always slept on your stomach, Azriel's large wing over the top of your smaller ones, your hands and possibly a leg touching. 

Since losing your wings 6 months ago, though, sleeping has changed significantly. It happened one night on a whim, Azriel laying between your legs on his tummy while you played with his hair. Between the warmth and weight of his body on yours, you had fallen asleep after he had. It had become almost nightly now, you falling asleep on your back, basking in the comfort his body weight brought you. 

Azriel shifted above you, sensing you were awake through the bond, and snuggled in tighter. "5 more minutes," sleep laced his deep voice, causing it to be slightly graveled. "Then kisses."

"What if I want kisses now?" Azriel seemed to instantly perk up at the question, his eyes suddenly wide and alert. 

He moved so he was directly above you, a scarred finger coming to trace your cheekbones. "Then who would I be to deny such a beautiful female her morning kisses?" Before he could act on the request, your bedroom door slammed open and a body dived into your bed, shaking it slightly. 

Azriel glared towards your older brother, "What, Cassian?"

You felt Cassian wiggle a hand between you two, finding your waist and pulling you over to him. "You're late for training, she is late for her meeting with Madja." 

Meeting was a polite way to put what you did once a week with the elderly healer. Once a week, you two sat with tea and talked. Sometimes it was about life, sometimes it was about what happened. Sometimes you just listened to her speak about healing, an unexpected career change you recently began going through. 

Azriel buried his head into your shoulder, sighing deeply before getting up and grabbing clothing to change into. Cassian held you close, softly kissing your temple as he dug his body into your bed. "Sorry, Sissy. He's been late the past 5 days."

You didn't have the heart to tell Cassian why. Azriel was ready to settle down to start a family. He wanted late mornings in your bed, and early nights turned in before the sun had fully set. He wanted to know you were safe, no longer a target, and that he'd be with you at all times instead of away for weeks. Azriel was ready to start a family. Cassian had, now the proud dad of a newborn girl. Rhysand had the proud father of a tiny Illyrian male. Azriel was ready for the same joy they had, and you were ready for it, too. 

"Maybe he needs a vacation," you replied. Cassian shrugged. "Or maybe he needed those morning kisses you interrupted."

You two heard Azriel yell in confirmation from the bathroom, and both chuckled. "Madja is waiting for you. I know you don't like these sessions, but they have been good for you."

You stared at him, blinking slowly. "I can't really get out of bed with you here."

"Why?"

"She's naked," Azriel appeared, wearing his training leathers. "Let's go, Cass." Cassian's face flushed before he got out of the bed. "I'll tell her you're on your way." Azriel leaned down, kissing you gently. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Rhys and Madja sat downstairs. They were sipping tea and whispering softly regarding your progress. "She's wonderful with children especially," the old healer said as she added another spoon of sugar into the tea. "They love her and respond to her very well."

Rhysand shifted. "That does not surprise me. Nyx and Emmy both love her. How is she mentally." 

"I'm okay," you moved into the room and sat in the third chair. "No nightmares for the past 3 months." Rhys nodded, reaching for your hand. "Azriel and I talked about starting a family."

They both immediately straightened up, Madja's eyes beginning to sparkle in excitement. "That is a big step, y/n. How do you feel about that?"

You smiled. "We've both always wanted kids. It's just the natural progression at this point. I do not have to work, we technically own the cabin we'd move to outright, we are financially secure."

"But are you ready?" Rhys asked softly. "There's a 100% chance of wings, if it's a girl-"

"She would be loved regardless of what happened to me and protected by her father." You looked firmly at Rhys. "We want this. I want this."

He nodded, rested his forehead against your hand. "Then I want it for both of you as well. Nyx has loved being a big cousin."

Madja trailed back. "Do you not want to work, y/n?" 

You shook your head. "I do until I am pregnant. Once I have a babe, though, I would like to enjoy a stay at home mother role." 

Madja nodded, her smile still firm on her face. "I believe you are healthy enough to have a child. You have my approval as your healer."

Rhys looked towards the door to the training area and sighed. "Cassian is bleeding. They're on their way in." 

Azriel walked in seconds later, a sly smile on his face as he supported Cassian. "Idiot zigged when he should have zagged. Flew straight into a kick." Cassian huffed out a laugh as you moved to allow him to take your spot and went to Azriel's side. 

His arm wrapped around your waist, "You are happy."

You kissed his cheek, smiling as you rested your head on his shoulder. "Happiest I've been in a while."

Azriel leaned into you, whispering into your ear. "Did she approve?" You nodded, feeling his grin grow. "And Rhys?" You nodded again. "Then we should start trying. Now."

"Now?" You looked at him, eyes wide.

"Now," he confirmed before pulling you up the stairs, the two of you laughing with each step. 

[sabahs-stuff]

Manifest appearance change. (Weight loss/gain)

(Success story)

❏First and foremost, Yeah, I know you shouldn't let go of your manifestation. Like detaching from your manifestation bla bla..

However, I have noticed that actively affirming appearance change is difficult for me because I love looking at my reflection in the mirror all the time. And I've to constantly remind myself to affirm. Every time I affirm, one of my inner voices started stating the opposite.

I weighed 47kg (I'm 5'3; I know it's the ideal weight, but I wanted to gain a little more). It was difficult for me to eat more. I believe it was about April 14 or 15. I decided to quit trying to eat more. I started to joke that I was gaining weight without eating,"are u kidding me? I'm eating nothing and also skipping dinner these days, so how tf am I gaining weight?" Some of my friends even laughed at me.🙂

Then, out of nowhere, my sister began complaining that I had gained weight, then few days ago I went to the doctor for a checkup, and they also measured my weight, it's 51KG now. Mind you, I skipped a lot of meals and wasn't eating at all. It was during the Mercury retrograde. I was quite depressed and saddened also someone so close to me died. But it took me like 10 days to gain 4kg. If that's not shocking idk what is.

So, this is what I did (•_•)

Reminder : "If you could make yourself believe that you have the exact appearance you desire, it would change"

Every time I ate, I told myself, "I should be dieting." And look at what I'M doing. I should start working out before it's too late. And that is all. Then I didn't even affirm anything during the day, ( I believe that if you make your brain believe that you're prettiest little creature on the planet and your existence is a service to the humanity then that's how it would be. And my toxic trait is that I believe my presence is a blessing to the humanity.😂

every time I looked in the mirror, I said, "Wtf? I'm gaining weight . "Shit, I need to diet." And trust me when I tell you at that exact moment your brain is going send you a thought "Stop lying; you're still skinny bitch"

But don't forget that you get to select what happens in your reality. If your mind wants to offer you lemons, make lemonade.😂

I said, "Yes, that's correct. If I want to lose my weight I need to affirm I'm still skinny" and I kept on saying "I need to lose weight or I'll gain more weight" just tricked my brain into thinking that I'm chubby and attempting to manifest becoming skinny. And I didn't focused on the end goal; I wasn't obsessed with it; I didn't give a damn about it, but whenever I noticed a little change, I freaked out as if something terrible had happened. And believe me when I say I freaked out it was Oscar worthy😂

I Remember, the first thing I noticed was that my arm was looking a bit chubby. I was screaming and even fake crying, 😭 "Damn this is embarrassing, I need to work out, I'm gaining weight." I then searched and downloaded weight loss workouts online.

Trust me I was living the moment 😂. literally living in the end. It was easy at the time because my brain was literally blank. I had no feelings or emotions, so I fed my brain whatever I wanted, and it ate every thought I gave it. I'm happy with my weight now.

I'm now 51kg this is just a photo I saved from Pinterest but this is my Desired type-

Here are some tips:

Your appearance is constantly changing with your affirmations and beliefs. So don't doubt whether this is going to work or not. 

Your manifestation will take time, depending on you and your beliefs.

And about mental health, I would post about it later, but it's important.

The more you visualize, the faster it will become a reality.Visualise everything; literally, everything you want, VISUALIZE 🙌 stay in your head

The amount of things I changed and manifested in my life is crazy; it's different for each person. But it took me a year to fully understand manifestation. So give yourself time. Spend time with yourself; the better you know yourself, the better you'll get in manifestation. Best advice: talk to yourself (in your head, of course, or others would think you're crazy, lol 😹.)  gossip with yourself; if you want to be tall tell yourself that you're tall and stick to it refuse to let go. ✊🏻

Hope you like it. It's my first ever post but clearly not the last 😉 feel free to ask any questions. 🩷

[dragonfirerogue-writes]

hi this is my first time sending a request and this one was rejected by other writer so I wondered if you could write it instead. I love quinn and I was thinking about a quinn fabray x fem!reader where reader was quinn first love back in middle school in that old school of hers and they had confessed to each other. reader loved quinn since her lucy caboosey phase and you could add that russell or Judy found out and separated them and encouraged quinn to get the nose job and lose weight. anyways, reader goes to McKinley during season 2 where quinn is trying to get her life together and she snaps when reader tries to approach her using her old name they don't speak anymore but reader always look out for quinn from the sideways (she's not from the glee club but she befriends Rachel) and quinn gets even more pissed when she catches rachel mentioning you before glee starts. the whole mess with lucy caboosey gets out and they finally speaks w reader comforting Quinn. make it angsty with a happy ending do not spare our feelings😂

-🫧

Still By Your Side

You know you're staring, but you can't help it. Something about this girl in your class is so familiar. You just can't put your finger on it.

See, you used to live in Lima, but you moved away in middle school. Forced away, rather. Now you're back and junior year began at McKinley High. While you recognized a lot of people, this one person just couldn't jog your memory.

Not until her eyes bore into yours.

As soon as class ends, you pack up your things and dart after the blonde.

"Hey! Wait!"

The blonde turns around, eyebrows cocked with an annoyed look on her face. She doesn't say anything, waiting for you to tell her why you're bothering her.

You take a moment to take her in. This girl was beautiful, that's for sure. There was a grace about her to match. Even her annoyed face looked pretty. You shake the thought from your head before finally speaking.

"Lucy, right? Lucy Fabray? It's me, Y/N."

Almost immediately, a hand covers your mouth and you're shoved against the lockers. Eyes blazing with fury found your shocked ones.

"I don't care who you are. I don't care how we met. But you will NEVER utter that name ever again." She leans closer and dangerously lowers her voice. "I am not Lucy and I will never be again. I am Quinn Fabray. Lucy is dead."

She pushes off of you, shoving you further into the lockers before striding away. You just watch her leave, your heart breaking with each step she takes. You didn't even notice the person next to you until she spoke.

"Sorry about her. She's always been like that."

With a jolt of surprise, you turn to look at the short brunette next to you. There's a moment before you look towards Quinn again.

"No... Not always." A sigh escapes your lips before you turn your attention to your companion. "You're friends with Lu-er... Quinn?" The brunette lets out a soft, rueful laugh.

"Kind of? More like rivals, I guess. We're both in Glee Club together. I'm Rachel Berry." She holds out her hand, which you take to shake.

"Y/N," you reply. "Y/N Y/L."

"If you wanna get close to Quinn, you can join Glee. We always need more members anyway." She offers. You consider it for a moment before shaking your head.

"Nah. I won't bother her like that. And I'd rather get myself settled before joining any clubs." You smile. "Thanks though. Maybe in the future." Rachel returns your smile with her own wide one.

"I'll hold you to that."

-----+++++-----

As the days pass, you learn more about Quinn thanks to Rachel. Her pregnancy and the resulting fallout with her parents, her life with the Glee Club, and now her determination to return to life before her baby. It was a lot and you weren't surprised by how much it affected her. You've already decided to stay out of Quinn's way, but they didn't mean you weren't still drawn to her.

While you tried your best to avoid directly interacting with the blonde, there were times when it was inevitable. Much like when she and Santana got into a fight in the hallway and you made it a point to pull Quinn away while blocking the Latina's attacks with your body.

Quinn didn't even acknowledge you.

It wasn't ideal. Your heart squeezed in pain with every rebuff. But the love you held for her, from the moment you met Lucy, it was worth every glance.

Only once did Quinn speak to you after meeting again. It had been months of just being in her orbit. But suddenly, you're slammed against the wall.

"Stay away from Berry." She growls. "I already have to deal with you everywhere else. I don't need that dwarf opening her big mouth to speak your name."

Recovered from the push and sudden rant, you retort.

"We haven't spoken since the first day! I even honored your request, Quinn. I don't understand why you dislike me so much."

"You don't get it." She leans into your space. If you weren't so frustrated, you would've blushed. "You're the only one who knows about Lucy. About everything I had to go through because of her. You can ruin my reputation with that knowledge. How can I not hate you?"

You could only blink in shock. So much was forgotten. Or rather, repressed. After a moment, you sigh.

"Quinn... What would I gain from that?" With a slump, your head thumps against the wall. "You may have forgotten but I... I loved Lucy." You hear a soft gasp. "I still love her. Even after your parents forced me away. Even after all this time."

You finally look straight into Quinn's eyes.

"If I ever talk about Lucy, it will only be with love and adoration. But since you don't want any indication of her existence, then she'll live in my heart. I'm not here to hurt you, Quinn. You have my word."

With that last word, you push past Quinn, leaving her in the hallway. You laid everything out there and you hope the blonde would trust you.

You didn't notice the look of awe in her face.

-----+++++-----

The first thing you noticed when you walked into school the next week were the whispers. Gossip sprung up all around you. You were confused until you were faced with a poster of a familiar photo.

Lucy Caboosey.

Almost immediately, you move to look for Quinn. At the choir room, you were met with most of the New Directions. Upon seeing you, Rachel rushed up.

"Y/N!"

"What's going on?" Another girl piped up.

"Fabray was being more annoying than Rachel." You recognized her to be Lauren Zizes. "I found out her little secret and decided to even the odds for Prom Queen."

You just stared at her. "YOU WHAT!?"

Everyone jumped at your voice.

"Do you know what she had to go through because of that bullying? I basically had to be her bodyguard in middle school just so she wouldn't be pushed to do anything drastic. And. You. Bring. That. BACK!?"

It didn't matter that Zizes was twice your size and stronger. She shrunk at your rage.

"You better damn well hope I find her before I see you again."

You whirl around to continue your search for Quinn, leaving the group in fear and awe.

Eventually, you follow the trail of torn posters to a classroom where you find the blonde crying at a desk. Quietly, you take a place across from her and wait for her to acknowledge you. It didn't take long for her to look up at you with teary eyes.

"Y/N..."

You smile. "Hey, Luce. Sorry I wasn't around to protect you this time." Quinn let's out a scoff.

"Please. I pushed you away. It's my own fault." A sigh escapes her lips. "How am I going to face the school now?"

"The same way you always did."

Quinn just looks at you, confused.

"Sure, you had an outburst. But you can't let that, or your past, dictate what you do now." You reach out your hand, palm up in an inviting manner. "You show that it doesn't control you. Even if you're just faking it."

She stares at your hand.

"Why are you doing this? After everything that's happened between us." You just give her a sad smile.

"I told you before. I love Lucy. Always will. I told her that as long as I was around, I'd protect her. I intend to keep it."

A tear falls from Quinn's eyes as she looks at you with wonder. Her hand covers yours and she revels in its warmth.

"Do you think you can... Love Quinn like you did Lucy? I've changed so much since you left. I'm not Lucy Caboosey anymore."

"Quinn," you start. "I don't think I could love you like I did Lucy." The blonde wilts, her heart breaking. Her hand clutches tighter onto yours. She had been so scared of her reputation crumbling that it masked her own feelings for you. Feelings she held for so long.

Quinn's actions catch your attention and when you look into her eyes, you're struck by the emotion in them. In an instant, you're back in middle school and falling in love all over again. You let yourself stay in that moment for a bit before speaking again.

"Lucy has a special place in my heart. She's my first love." You watch as your thumb caresses Quinn's hand. "It'll always be there, but it'll never grow." Your eyes meet again. "It can grow with you though. I may not know Quinn as well as I did Lucy, but I'd like to."

The smile on your face is immediately covered by soft lips. In a surge of emotion, the blonde leaned forward to kiss you. Before you could even react, she retreats.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself..." The light blush on her face sparks another memory and your smile widens.

"And here I thought I'd be the one to break." You chuckle. Gently, you lift her hand and kiss each knuckle. "Maybe let me kiss back this time?"

Quinn's blush deepens.