#how many characters of his does this make that are gender bending in some way

[the-boney-rolls]

how HOW have I never noticed that this is a song about a drag queen??

[beesspacedotorg]

Honeysuckle, Honey Boy, Honey Sweet

Summary: You take care of your Beta during his rut, and he's sweet as can be.

Warning: OMEGAVERSE !!!1!!1! sex. gender neutral reader. nothing too crazy for this one. hyune is sweet and subby because this is my house I make the rules. you don't have to read Dibs or Third Leg to understand what's going on, but it would make me happy. special thanks to ems for reading this and letting me know if it was bars. and for letting me steal the honey boy nickname

notes: hello adoring public. this is the third part of the dibsverse. this is what happens when you're insane. I had intended to post this in March and then forgot. Oopsie. I hope you enjoy it and have fun reading it the way I had fun imagining Hwang Hyunjin sweaty and naked.

You love your Hyunjin, your honey boy. That’s how you refer to him in your head, as yours. In all reality, you share him with the pack, but he holds a special place in your heart. He found you first, he kissed you first, he was your first in this pack for many things. You two are laying together, curled up on his bed watching some Business Proposal for what feels like the hundredth time.

“He looks a little like Seungmin,” is what you say and he rolls his eyes.

“You say that every time.”

“It’s not my fault. He does. Also, the glasses thing is hot.” Hyunjin huffs at you.

“I wear glasses.” He sounds like he’s pouting. You turn your head to the side and see that he is.

“Are you … Hwang Hyunjin, are you jealous? Of Cha Sunghoon?” You pause the show. Hyunjin presses his palms into his eyes and sighs.

“No. Well. Maybe.” You frown at him, it’s not like him to be jealous. He’s so full of love for everyone and everything, and you know that the pack would bend over backwards to make sure he feels cared for so this has to be something specific.

“Hyunnie. What’s wrong?”

“I think my cycle is going to start soon.” You hum at him.

“What’s it feel like?” Hyunjin is a Beta, so while his cycles may be mild, he’s subjected to either heats or ruts depending on who he’s around. Your pack has a considerable amount of Omegas, and you know that Changbin’s cycle throws him all over the place depending on who he spends more time around during that period, but you aren’t sure how Hyunjin’s works. The two of you have been together for a while, but his cycle is slower than most, so he hasn’t yet had anything.

“A rut, I think.” You hum again.

“Is that why you’re needlessly jealous over me thinking a fictional character is hot?”

“I’m not jealous-”

“You most certainly are.”

“Fine, I’m not jealous of Cha Sunghoon.”

“Better. Who are you jealous of then, baby?” He hides his face in a pillow and says something that you don’t hear.

“What?” You raise your voice a little, poking his side until he answers you.

“I’m jealous of Seungmin.” That makes you still.

“Seungminnie? What- why?” Hyunjin crosses his arms.

“You keep talking about how hot he is!”

“Well, what do you want me to do, be blind?”

“No, I just-” Hyunjin flops himself over in bed so he’s not facing you anymore, and you can tell from the way his sweet honeysuckle turns into rot that he’s not happy. You lay down beside him and wrap your arms around his back.

“Honey boy. What is it you want me to do?”

“Will you spend it with me?”

“Yeah, I will. Don’t worry.” You kiss the back of his neck, his long hair tickling your nose. “Anything for you, baby.”

-

Felix drapes himself along your back while you’re in the kitchen.

“Hi.”

“Hello, Yongbokkie. What’s up?”

“Hyunjinnie smells like he’s close.”

“Does he?” Your tone is tinged with sarcasm. Hyunjin hasn’t let you out of his sight for very long since you agreed, getting more and more possessive as it gets closer to the start of his cycle. You don’t mind, but you’re also more aware than anyone else how close he is, all things considered. Felix bites you in retaliation for your snark.

“Mean.”

“Captain obvious.”

“What are you doing in here? All by your lonesome.” Felix’s hands start wandering and you laugh a little at him.

“I was going to see if we had enough food, but it seems our Luna took care of that already. So, I’m making a snack instead.” Felix starts to slide his hands under your shirt, mouthing at your neck.

“That’s crazy. I could be your snack instead.” You burst into laughter, shaking him off a little.

“That’s the corniest thing I’ve ever heard in my life, and Changbin took me on a date last week.” You hear a half-hearted yell from the living room that makes you snort.

“So… is that a no?” Felix’s hands are resting on your hips, and you feed him a bit of your snack when he hooks his chin over your shoulder.

“That is a no.” Felix huffs, letting go of you to throw a fake fit behind you.

Felix pretends to throw things around the kitchen, ranting about spoiled Omegas and how they don’t know how to please their Alphas anymore. Something you find extremely ironic, because Felix is an Omega. You’re in the middle of laughing at him when Hyunjin comes in, hair wet from his shower. He gives you a backhug, water droplets falling on you.

“Hi, baby.”

“Hi, Hyunnie. How was your shower?”

“Would’ve been better if you were in it.” You hear Felix gag. Hyunjin flips him off.

“That’s what she said.” You can’t help yourself, giggling at your own joke. Hyunjin takes Felix’s place in your neck.

“Lee Felix Yongbok.” You hear Felix snicker.

“Yeah?” He’s wormed his way between you and the counter to stare Hyunjin in the eye. He’s also in the way of your snack.

“You’re doing this on purpose.”

“Doing what? I’m not doing anything.” Felix smiles, sweet and deceiving, before he wraps his arms around your waist and gets nose-to-nose with Hyunjin.

“I’m telling Channie hyung.” Felix shrugs. Hyunjin’s scent changes so something a little tangier and you can picture him squinting his eyes. “I’m telling Minho.” Felix pulls away almost immediately.

“Hyunjinnie, you’re so mean to me.”

“You’re riling me up on purpose!” Lavender hits your nose before Hyunjin is done speaking.

“Speak of the devil,” you mumble. Felix is still in the way of your snack.

“Yongbokkie,” you know that coo. Felix is fucked.

“Hi, hyung.”

“Are you teasing our Hyunjinnie?”

“I would never.”

“Liar,” Felix has finally moved away from your food. You shove some of it in your mouth when you snitch on him.

“Hey!” He says that, but he’s following where Minho is dragging him with little to no resistance.

“Send me pictures, please.”

“Perv.”

“Sky is blue, grass is green.” Hyunjin grumbles some more as the resident cats of the house leave the kitchen. You feed him.

“Do you want to go to my room, dove?” His voice is quiet, sleepy.

“Yeah. Let’s lay down, hmm?”

-

You like Hyunjin’s room. The walls are painted a calming shade of periwinkle and they’re decorated with pictures of the pack and paintings he made. His desk is covered in half finished sketchbooks and paints. If you look at his easel, there’s a half drawn portrait of you with a picture you don’t remember him taking attached to it.

He’s also in there, which is nice.

He’s woken you up from a nap, hips rutting against your ass and sweat dripping onto your skin.

“Hyune?” Your voice is crackly and groggy with sleep, you think you might have sweat through your shirt, and there’s a pillow crease on your cheek.

“Baby,” he lets out a whine and something in you cracks a little.

“Hey, hmm? What’s wrong?” You turn around to cup his cheeks, and he leans his head into them. You know what’s wrong, so the question is a little redundant, but you ask anyway. Not that it matters, because instead of answering he hikes your leg over his hip and grinds against you in a way that’s dirty and draws noises out of you that you know you’re going to get shit for later.

“Hyunjin, sweetheart, let’s get these off, yeah?” You move to pull away and his grip tightens on you in a way that’s almost painful, an arm coming up under your body to wrap around your waist. He lets out a short growl, and then his eyes widen at himself.

“Okay, yeah. That’s fine. We can stay like this.” His hips pick back up, and you know without a doubt that these sleep shorts and underwear are going straight in the trash when you’re done. Well, maybe not straight. Han Jisung and Lee Felix are freaks.

You let him rut against you messily, kissing his face and his mouth when you can. He’s stronger than he looks, and you aren’t doing anything to fight back, so his motions are rocking you up the bed.

He lets out another whine when he comes, face red and sweaty and the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. He’s finally still, and you can feel every place where your body fluids are cooling down and it’s largely unpleasant. Hyunjin seems to agree because he starts shoving at the clothes he’s wearing angrily. You grab his hands.

“Hey, hey, Hyunjinnie. Let me help, yeah? Let me help and then you can finally fuck me. Isn’t that what you want?” You get to watch his pupils dilate in real time, plush lips falling open as his jaw drops. He’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen. You want to eat him alive. You take off his clothes and yours, dropping the soiled clothes somewhere on the floor because Hyunjin doesn’t seem to care what happens to them right now.

You and him have fucked, to be sure. After everything with Minho, there isn’t a moment where you aren’t being propositioned by someone in the pack. You’ve never seen him like this though, flushed and sweaty, out of it with rut. For a second, you’re worried he might have rut fever, but he can still understand you when you talk to him, and he still kisses back when you press your lips to him, so he’s fine.

“Dove,” his voice is scratchy with disuse and something else.

“Hmm?”

“Want in, please, let me. Lemme,” his hands are pawing at your hips desperately. You lace your fingers through his hair and pull his head back, kissing his neck.

“Calm down. I’ve gotta get ready first. You don’t wanna hurt me, do you?” He shakes his head as best he can through the grip you have on his hair. “That’s what I thought. My honey boy doesn’t wanna hurt his precious Omega, right?” You shift so you’re straddling him, seating yourself right above his cock. You know he can feel where you’re leaking and wet for him. You know what you’re doing is mean, but he already came once, you can have some fun.

“Hyunjinnie,” you let go of his hair to rest your hands on his chest, sliding yourself along his cock. “You feel so nice like this, maybe I won’t even let you inside.” He pouts, eyes furrowing in that cute way of his, bottom lip jutting out and you kiss it.

“I’m kidding.”

“Better be.”

You get yourself off like that, sliding along his cock, letting the tip graze your hole for just a second, just to tease. Hyunjin comes too, a second time, adding to the slick mess on his stomach. He’s whining now, hands grabbing everywhere he can reach, your chest, your ass, your neck, but he hasn’t made any move to force you despite his rut. He’s dirty, your boy.

You know that you wouldn’t be getting away with this if it wasn’t Hyunjin. You know that if you were with any of the Alpha’s during their ruts or Changbinnie or the Omega’s you would’ve been pinned to the bed and stuffed full by now. The knowledge gives you a bit of a head rush. That Hyunjinnie wants you to make him beg a little for what he wants, that he trusts you to take care of him when he’s too out of it to take care of himself. You lean forward and kiss him, all tongue and teeth and filthy.

“Dove, please.” He says this against your mouth, one hand coming up to the back of your head, the other gripping your wrist where it still sits on his chest. You can feel how his grip tightens and loosens periodically, and you appreciate the effort he’s making to not hurt you.

You lean back and this time, this time, you let him sink into you, sliding down down down until you’re at the hilt, sitting prettily on his hips. The noise he lets out is music to your ears, but it’s loud. You hum, rocking against him while he squirms under you.

“Hyunjinnie, baby.”

“Mm?” He peeks his eyes open, god, he’s a vision. Pretty brown eyes blown wide, mouth kiss bruised and open just enough that his pretty tongue is peeking out just a little. His hair is sweat slick just like the rest of him and it’s plastered to his face in some areas.

“Open your mouth for me, honey.” He does, a little confused, but sweet like always. You shove two of your fingers in his mouth and watch as his eyes roll back in his head and his hips buck up into you.

He’s groaning as he sucks on your fingers, treating them the way he would a cock, and you throb at the visual. He’s wrapped his own long fingers around your wrist, moving your hand in and out of his mouth himself. You use a little force to make him gag on them, just because, and the moan he grants you with has you feeling dizzy.

“Honey boy,” You keep your fingers in his mouth as you return your focus to riding him. “Such a pretty boy. Pretty cock too, yeah?” You hook your fingers behind his teeth and yank his jaw open. He has such a pretty mouth. Maybe after his ruts over you’ll play with it. Run the pads of your fingers over his teeth and along his tongue. Push your fingers back until he gags on them, hold them there for good measure. Watch as his drool runs down his face and off your wrist before teasing him for making such a mess.

“Should I get one of the Alpha’s in here? Hmm? Let you choke on their cocks while I ride you silly? Or maybe I should bring in Changbinnie? He stretches your jaw out so nice, doesn’t he?” You feel Hyunjin’s dick kick inside you, but he shakes his head anyway.

“No, you don’t want that?” He grabs your wrist to pull your fingers free and you oblige.

“No, want,” he sucks in a shaky breath when you wipe his spit on his cheek, “just want you.”

If he wasn’t high off brain chemicals, you’d accuse him of flirting with you. You know that he’s not running game, just being honest and sweet, but something in your chest flutters and seizes, causing you to stop your movements.

“Hyunjin,” you didn’t think you’d cry this time. Absolutely certain that you could avoid it if you were taking the lead. He lets out a whine like he’s been hurt and reaches up to wipe the tears off your cheeks.

“Dove?” He sounds panicked, and you kiss him to shut him up. You know he’s been thrown for a loop by your tears, worried he’s hurt you or underperforming in some way, not with it enough to know that you’re crying because you’re in love with him.

“You’re a charmer, aren’t you, Jinnie?” You sniff slightly and pat his shoulder. “I’m getting tired, why don’t you finish the job, hmm?” He goes to turn you over and you pinch his arm. “Like this. I like the way you look under me.” You smile salaciously at him and he ducks his head a little, suddenly shy. You stay where you are, nose-to-nose with him so you can kiss him when you please and lift your knees a little so he has room to play, and he takes it.

He’s sloppy and uncoordinated, but that doesn’t stop him from shifting around until he’s found an angle that has you moaning almost as loud as he is. It makes him smirk, all self satisfied and cocky, before you yank his hair a little and he loses it.

“‘S good.” He’s cute like this, moaning and whining about how hot and wet you are around him.

“Yeah? Just a little more and you’ll make me come too.” He groans. “You want that? Want me to come on your cock?” He nods fervently and his thrusts get faster. You lean down so your lips are pressed against his ear and you can feel his sweat slicked chest gliding against yours.

“Or, maybe you want me to come on your knot. C’mon, honey boy. Let me have it. Your Omega wants it so bad.”

He growls this time, yanking you down by the hips while he fucks up into you, forcing his knot inside your heat. He’s a Beta, so admittedly his knot isn’t as big as an Alpha’s is, but you moan and come on it just like you said you would.

“More.” He reaches his hand between the two of you and places it where you’re sensitive and swollen.

“Hyunnie, what?”

“One more. One more, c’mon.” His spare hand comes up to rest inbetween to shoulder blades, forcing your chest down against him. Between that and his knot you’re stuck

“You motherfucker-”

“Please,” his voice is deep and low and right in your ear. He lets out a groan when the way he’s touching you has him clenching on his knot.

“Hwang Hyunjin-” Your threat is too breathy to have any bite.

“You said you’d do it, you have to.” It doesn’t seem to dawn on him that you came when he did, or if it did he doesn’t care because he keeps up the stimulation until you fall apart on top of him again, walls fluttering along his cock, teeth biting just shy of his scent gland.

When you come back to yourself, he’s pressing kisses on your shoulder.

“You’re a shithead.” You tell him this softly, while running your fingers along the side of his face. He grumbles in response.

“You bit me.”

“Deserved.”

You stop scolding him to kiss him again. It’s not your fault his mouth is so kissable.

“You feel better, honey boy?”

“I feel tired.”

“Good.” He rolls the two of you over until you’re on your side, eyes closing. “Hey.”

“What?”

“Open your mouth.” He squints at you.

“Why?”

“I wanna see it.”

“You’re a freak.” He drops his jaw anyway.

-

(Halfway through your in depth exploration of his molars your phone buzzes. It’s Minho, with pictures of Felix fucked out and crying.

“Who?” Your fingers are still in Hyunjin’s mouth so it comes out muffled. You show him your phone as you take them out.

“Lixie got his just desserts.”

“You can be my dessert.”

“Corny.” You let him roll you onto your back anyway.)

[w4w4lycsss]

I saw you were taking requests for Hades :3

Soo...him x transmasc reader maybe? Like the reader is dysphoric n stuff sigh

And just him x a male reader in general I'm not normal abt the man ragh

SHUT UP, BOY | HADES

summary: You had resentment towards Hades because you feel that he does not validate you, which is quite the opposite and he shows it to you. pairing: Hades x male!transmasc!reader warning: gender dysphoria, body dysphoria and transphobia a/n: I'm a member of the trans umbrella! It was very nice to write it

You had gotten into the bad habit of being a very defensive boy, everything they said to you you took rudely to defend yourself, and it was a terrible way to socialize, so you didn't have many friends. No matter how villainous, macabre and twisted the VKs were, they all respected your identity and when they made fun of you they had the minimum education to respect your identity, at least.

You were angry with them because they had tripped you and you had thrown your things at the entrance to your room, a gesture that irritated your already strong character, you were just sitting on the floor picking up and releasing indirect insults to those who did not see you and collided with you .

When you are missing half of your books, someone bumps their knee into your shoulder, making you raise your head angrily to complain without receiving a response. The person is forgotten when you see Hades, yes, the god of the underworld himself and a VK walk in your direction staring at you.

The only thing you think about is quickly picking up your books before it's too late and he throws them at you again.

 A whirlpool attacks your brain, sweeping away your coherent thoughts when he finally reaches you, bending down and picking up the missing half. You didn't know whether to thank him or insult him.

“I need help with homework. I’m going to pay you back.”

SON OF A BITCH. INTERESTED. UNGRATEFUL TORCH-

You just roll your eyes and receive your books, carrying some in your arms and putting others in your bag. “First, what do you intend to pay me with?” You pause when he opens his mouth. “I'm not interested in money.”

He raised an eyebrow. “What do you want then?”

“Your friends stop bothering me.”

“I can’t promise they will deliver.”

“Then let them reduce it.”

He shrugged and you walked into your room, being followed by him. They were not going to comply.

After doing what many thought impossible, that is, Hades getting a good grade, he didn't stop looking for you with stupid excuses, the most common being that he was bored and couldn't find his friends or he was tired of listening to Uliana complain.

Little by little they formed what could be called 'hate friendship', which was the two of you being friends who insult each other and make unpleasant comments about each other but who at the same time help and defend each other.

Defender.

Not everyone at school was open-minded like you expected, and after a while you got used to it and just let them be as long as they didn't blurt out some personally derogatory comment for the purpose of being annoying. How had it happened to you now?

You were locked in your room, you had locked the door while you looked at yourself with contempt in the full-length mirror; You never hated yourself, you just let yourself develop and when you came of age you would do what you had to do.

You watched as your hair trailed to your elbows, embracing you in an unpleasant mess like greasy cobwebs. Your sculpted waist as if you were a porcelain doll and the curve of your legs towards your crotch made you nauseous.  Your bust wasn't exaggerated, but not all the layers of clothing in the world could hide it.

Miss. Lady. Princess.

“Y/N!” He knocked on your door hard.

“I'm not here.”

“If you don't open the door I'll burn it”

“No, you won't.” You sighed, tearing your heavy gaze away from the distorted figure in the mirror and turning the knob to let Hades in. “What happend?”

He took your arms in a paranoid manner hidden from external annoyance. “What happend? That you locked yourself in your room after an idiot has opened his mouth, that has happened.”

“Where is he now?” You furrowed your eyebrows in doubt.

"Oh, he'll probably be in the infirmary because of the beating that Hook and Maleficent will give him."

"There's no necessary."

“It is completely necessary. Are you OK? Why did you lock the door?”

You looked down. Your face did not express anything; neither tiredness, nor annoyance, nor discomfort nor sadness, it was like a blank canvas that seemed to be painted with the desperation of your mind to be someone.

“I'm fine, seriously, it was nothing.”

Hades, still unconvinced drowning in paranoia and holding your arms so tightly that his nails were beginning to print on your arms, finally hugged you, rubbing his hands down your back to give you comfort.

“You're not like the others, right?”

"What are you talking about?"

“I thought you hated me.”

"I don't understand you."

“Hades, do you see me as a boy?”

The words scratch your throat with the pain of letting them out in a broken whisper, which makes your face take on the expression of being desperate, but also of just wanting him to take care of it. He brings his leather-gloved hand up and cups your cheek, caressing it with his thumb. 

The look in his eyes is nothing but pure longing and cheesy crap you swore you hated until he started punching idiots who refused to respect you. Maybe it wasn't the most romantic thing, but the intention to dare was something new.

"You're my boy, if you wasn't like that I wouldn't have let you get as close as you are now.”

“You came to me.”

He shrugged. “It's something you hit me.”

His face gets dangerously close to yours until his lips meet yours, making your stomach jump and you leave him alone, speaking for all the times you dreamed of a happy ending full of pink hearts for Let them shut up and let you live in the very close moment.

[peacheises]

♠️♥️ Lyney x Reader♥️♠️

Synopsis: Reader has some serious escapist tendencies, no friends anymore, and lives in a shell they are too afraid to crawl out of because they perceive reality as disgusting and mundane nowadays. What happens when a certain magician shows them that reality can still be beautiful as a way to thank them for the freedom they inadvertently granted him with?

!!SPOILERS FOR THE ARCHON QUEST!!

This is kinda long! I also made it at 1 AM so if there are any errors it's cuz of that ('□`) I personally have been going through some things and have been finding a lot of comfort in this goofy ol'magician. So sorry if this has some darkers tones than my usual stuff! I tried to keep reader as gender neutral as I could by not name dropping anyone and only referring to them as "You" variations. If there is a slip up please tell me!

You're hardwired to be an extrovert, but you exist in an environment and place that shuns you and forces you into a shell.

You've had your voice ripped from your throat one too many times and you've been silenced for nothing more than a mere giggle.

You were raised in an isolated world, away from humanity and it's harsh reality.

You didn't have any friends growing up except for the occasional child of a parent's friend who would visit.

Your siblings would hide away and your father would yell all the time. Your mother was always at work. Your friends were in your worlds of fiction and your books. The drawings you began to make to see these adventures you had with them.

You don't know how real people act or how to speak with them, treating everything like dialogue in a book.

Friends you had made at one point eventually coined you as toxic because of your inability to speak with any of them properly. Perhaps you should've tried harder. No, you definitely should have tried harder.

Perhaps they would still be here if you had made more drawings for them. Maybe if you had kept your opinions to yourself. Maybe if you had just smiled and nodded. Maybe they would still be here.

You became a shell. Hiding yourself away from any possible relationships. Keeping yourself away from anyone else you could possibly hurt with your ignorance. You had friends, it's not like you were lonely. The characters you read about and drew all the time were your friends.

Yet, they began to feel empty. You began to feel empty. Focusing all your time on honing your talent and living in a world of fiction reality became bland. Disgusting even. This only drove you to hide away from it even more.

You were lonely, craving friends and love you knew you couldn't let yourself have. It was like an addiction. You had it once and now you want it more. But nothing else ever hits like that first high does, right?

For the sake of everyone else around you, you cut them all off. You were stung once. Being shelter your whole life you didn't know how to handle it. You gave up on everything and everyone.

You felt hollow.

You met him after one of his shows.

The magician was so insistent you see his next one.

You supposed it couldn't hurt.

So you arrived at his next one.

And then the next.

And the next.

Until you began to see every show of his.

He would speak to you after each one, ask you how your day was. He would tell you about his.

Even after he was ousted as a member of the fatui you still saw his shows. You still spoke with him. It was as if you didn't even care.

Something about him and his magic, the reality bending of it all was beautiful. The most beautiful thing you had seen in ages.

It didn't feel real, yet it was. It was magnificent. He was magnificent.

Nothing could change that. Especially not something as silly as a title or affiliations.

As far as you were concerned, he was wonderful.

Even after he began to show you his true colours.

He had shown you something beautiful, and for that you could only appreciate every side of him.

Everything about him was addictive, every single part and side. Every nook and cranny. Both sides of the beautiful coin.

That's when you realised you became too attached.

You didn't want to ruin something so beautiful with your thorns, so you stopped attending his shows.

Stopped seeing him all together.

You couldn't tarnish something so glorious by hurting the person responsible for it. You couldn't hurt the majesty of it all. The majesty he showed you.

He noticed you stopped attending his shows immediately.

He sought after you for ages. Since you hardly leave you house only for food he didn't find you for a while.

However, once he did he wouldn't leave.

He followed you around, asking all about where you had been.

You wouldn't respond.

All though he wouldn't speak of it, you in a way provided him with a sense of comfort.

You didn't even question him once after he was revealed to be of the House of Hearth.

All though you loved him for being able to break reality, you weren't a monster. You never forced him to keep up his acts. You knew even someone as talented as he needs breaks.

So when he approached you, his hair unstyled and in plain wear with nothing more than a mere request of comforting silence or idle chatter not regarding his work you obliged.

He felt as if he could show both sides of himself to you, both sides of that coin. He could be as flashy or as monotonous as he wished. You granted him a sort of freedom.

He became very quickly attached to you.

When you stopped showing up to his performances he panicked.

Perhaps you were tired of his antics?

It took a long time, but you eventually did open up about why you stopped showing up.

He felt a side of him ache.

You were just about as alone in this world as he was, yet not at the same time.

He had his siblings to talk to, the blonde traveller to talk to. You seemed to have no one.

To learn his shows were a break from the world you viewed of rancid initially and how it brought you to love every part of him.

How ethereal he was to you.

And how you were afraid you would grow obsessive and toxic and how you didn't want that for him.

How he had been the closest thing you've had to a friend in years and how attached you had become.

How worried you were for him, how you adored him so much you were willing to cut yourself away if it meant keeping him safe from something potentially toxic. Even if it meant sacrificing your own happiness.

He wouldn't let you feel this way, no, he couldn't let you feel this way anymore.

He assured you that he would never run away, no matter what sides of yourself you were to show him. After all, you did the same for him.

He would understand and help you learn how to make friends, how to properly interact with others. Yet, he would want you to be the same around him.

In a way, he wanted to help you build a mask to wear like he does but still provide you with people you can be yourself around.

He thinks you are wonderful and misunderstood, yet he understands not all can see that. He wants to protect you like he does his siblings.

It's the only way he knows how to help, and you don't seem to mind either. He can't change everyone or anyone's opinion of you. Those are to each their own. But you can. And he can help you find a way to do that.

He doesn't want you to change who you are, but but doesn't want you to feel isolated and alone anymore either.

So a removable mask seems as if it's the best answer, no?

He also introduces you to his siblings and a blonde traveller along with their adventuring party. You meet a large amount of kind people including a young man who visually strikes quite a similar appearance to your friendly magician with a platinum blonde ponytail and bright crimson eyes and a young woman with a long, pink ponytail that fades to a blue and eyes that seem to have seen things beyond the scope of what a woman her age normally would have.

If you begin to feel nervous making so many new friends and with things changing so quickly, he doesn't hesitate to take things slower. He isn't afraid to make any adjustments for you.

He isn't afraid to return the feeling of freedom you blessed him with, so let him crack that shell of yours and help you spread your wings to soar out of that black abyss of isolation you've been drowning yourself in.

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

Can I ask you why you write gender benders? Isn’t it just the same story? Whenever I read them it just feels like they want to make a gay pairing straight.

I’ve talked about this before but for new people who are curious here we go!

You’re right. A lot of gender bender fics do come across like that and I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the only reason they did it. I’ll admit some pairings to me appeal more as f/m then m/m or f/f. Don’t know why, but they do. Yet just as many f/m pairings only appeal to me if I make it gay.

But there is a very large population of people who write gender bends solely to make the pairing straight. And to be frank I see it often with pairings like TodoDeku. A semi popular pairing where they turn one of the characters into a thinly veiled OC but want people to read it.

The characters gender bent are done wildly OOC, without consideration and the story is exactly the same just with this thinly veiled OC. Who is often needing to be saved by their love interest. This new girl is not anything like her male counterpart.

I don’t like these stories. I actually hate them. I feel they’re kind of insults to the stories where gender bends are done right.

Genderbending a character changes the story. For an example (one I’ve been playing with for a while) female Bakugou would be smacked down for her attitude. It’s not feminine. It’s not right. Her mother might have the same attitude but she isn’t as violent- that sort of thing. This has a hugely adverse effect on Fem!Bakugou who gets meaner. People react badly.

But the one person who doesn’t do that and thinks she can be a hero is Izuku.

So, Bakugou latches right the fuck on, being stupidly possessive and protective. Full on yandere.

But it’s still the very angry and violent Bakugou.

For Todoroki as a girl I would never make her feminine. Ever. She would be a tomboy- because her father never let her be anything else. She would be the same emotionless person she was in canon as a boy. Ten to one she’d have the same hairstyle.

The change here would come after the sports festival where she slowly begins exploring herself. Even then I’d never make her feminine. I just can’t see Todoroki being like that. I think I did once but now? Yeah no. Not my jam for her.

But she would be treated differently. A boy being emotionless is hot. A girl being like that is weird. She’d be mocked and taunted. People would call her ice queen and gossip behind her back. I 100% all the girls in class wouldn’t like her because of this. I see her more isolated then canon.

Being a girl is not like being a boy. It’s a vastly different experience because of societal expectations. People treat girls and boys different.

A fem Izuku I see would be more downtrodden by society because her desire to be a hero would be pushed at more. She is a woman and Quirkless- double the ‘delicate’. While I would waffle about if the same sort of bullying would occur given ‘boys don’t hit girls’ I do think it’s possible.

Yet it’s still Izuku who stands up tall and won’t give up. Who in his/her heart of hearts is still the heroic spirit that inspired All Might. So things don’t fully change.

Genderbending gets a really bad rap due to homophobia and sexism. But really it’s a way to explore how things change based on society. How would a woman being X instead of a man goes about?

It’s not the same as making them trans. I do view making a character trans its own form of gender bending but the thing is that this is VASTLY different from going between cis male and cis woman. While I haven’t fully explored the transphobia side yet (due to my own dysphoria regarding my gender being a bitch) POP does explore how being a trans woman would affect Izuku.

Plus magic.

But yeah- the story is never the same when you switch genders. Anyone saying otherwise is naive or lying to themselves. I’d love to live in a world where gender doesn’t impact us but it does. Patriarchy is the dominate way the world works. In Western culture and Eastern. Pretending otherwise is again just you trying to lie.

So: I love genderbends for exploring the concepts. It’s fun!

I do hate it when it’s done to make things straight. I have… issues with certain ways they do some of it. But it’s fun!

[musicalmoritz]

Though on genderswap Mitsukou? What would their characters belike both appearance and personality wise?

Yuri Mitsukou!! I love this question

So awhile back I posted smth like “no fem4masc Yuri Mitsukou it has to be masc4masc” which like. I don’t really agree with anymore. I like that in canon one of them is feminine while the other is masculine and it’s not really done in a stereotypical way. Fandoms make a really big deal about people feminizing male characters- and for good reason, it does happen a lot. But that gets taken to the point that they end up unintentionally reinforcing traditional gender roles. “How dare you draw that man in a skirt” or “that male character would never cry.” It’s also weird to me that I never see the same defense given to female characters being masculinized, so it ends up feeling like a lot of fans just hate femininity. So when a male character is feminine and seemingly likes masc dudes but has one of the loudest personalities in the manga, I think it’s pretty neat. Ofc there are fans that are weirdly against calling Mitsuba feminine but I already blocked most of them so idk what they have to say

(I could talk more in-depth about how fans are so worried about feminizing Mitsuba that they erase all the soft parts of his personality and make him one-dimensional but I’ll hold my tongue)

However, with fem!Mitsuba things are usually portrayed differently. Since dude Mitsuba’s initial conflict was being bullied for looking like a girl, most people say that the reverse would be girl Mitsuba being bullied for looking like a dude. This is fine but we also have to keep in mind that the entire gag of Mitsuba’s character is that he looks feminine but has an unfiltered personality, based on his looks you would never expect him to act that way. So if girl Mitsuba looks boyish, does that mean her personality would be super soft and delicate?? Because, yeah Mitsuba does have a soft side but not in that way, and it’s not at the forefront of his personality. Plus girl Mitsuba could still get bullied for looking too feminine, internalized misogyny is very much a thing

However, at the end of the day it really depends on personal preference so I’m not at all bashing either depiction of fem!Mitsuba. I go back and forth over which one I like more. Gender themes are a pretty big part of how I write Mitsukou so it’s hard for me to imagine that switched up, but it’s also incredibly interesting to think abt. All in all I like to keep fem!Mitsuba looking androgynous, maybe she has a boyish face but still dresses very feminine. Or maybe she has a girly face but dresses very masc. It’s one of those things I like a variety of interpretation on. For this I say she keeps the same hair length and pink cardigan but wears the girls uniform. So like yeah she basically just looks the same

As for Kou, those of you that read my wlw Kou//Nene fic should know that masc girl Kou is actually everything to me. A lot of fans sort of flip their gender presentations when gender bending them- Mitsuba becomes masc and Kou becomes fem. That’s totally great if that’s what you like but for me personally Kou is gonna be wearing Old Spice. I like to imagine her hair a tad longer in the back, like a choppy version of the Bisexual Bob. She wears some type of hoodie over her uniform the same way canon Kou wears a t-shirt under his uniform. The hoodie is blue btw (gotta incorporate the lore from my mtsk fics)

I feel like their personalities and dynamic would stay mostly the same! Maybe make them a bit clingier the way female friendships are but they’re already pretty clingy in canon lol. I do wonder if Kou’s flaw of not being able to open up about his feelings properly would change due to gender socialization. But many women (including myself) have that problem too so I think it would stay the same. She might be able to open up to Teru or Yokoo and Satou better but she’d still struggle to admit when she’s feeling overwhelmed. I could see her not being the type to tell someone how she’s feeling until all those emotions have built up for months. That’s how I’ve seen the whole “can’t talk abt your emotions” problem present itself in women. And men tend to only feel comfortable opening up to their romantic partners, which is something we very much see with Mitsukou in canon. But with fem!Kou, if Yokoo and Satou were girls two they would probably encourage her to talk abt her feelings rather than just being like “let’s give him a task to distract him” (which is fine too, men have different ways of comforting their friends)

Thank you for this ask!!

[shall-we-die]

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{Lovely Boyfriend}

General Boyfriend Headcanons.

#NSFW (Tetchou) || #NSFW (Jouno)

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↬[Fandom]•⊰ {Bungo Stray Dogs}࿐

↬[Characters]•⊰↴

{Tetchou Suehiro || Jouno Saigiku}࿐

↬[Warnings]•⊰ {None}࿐

☰[Main list]•⊰ ────┈┈{0026}┈─╮

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╰┈➤Likes/Reblogs are appreciated࿐

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• Tetchou as a boyfriend is very caring and thoughtful. He is always thinking of new ways to make his s/o feel loved, and makes sure to show his gratitude for them. He is a great listener, and spends time and effort to really understand his lover's thoughts and feelings.

• He goes out of his way to do little things that make them smile, and tries to surprise them by doing things they enjoy. He is always there to provide support and comfort when it is needed, and never fails to show his appreciation towards them.

• Tetchou is very patient, understanding, and forgiving. He does his best to understand the feelings and thoughts of his s/o, and never judges them or holds anything against them. He puts in the effort to make them happy, and is always there to listen and provide support when they need it. He also puts a lot of thought into how to show his feelings, and never takes his significant other for granted. He is also very reliable, and they can always rely on him to be there for them no matter what.

• Tetchou, as a boyfriend, can be quite insecure and possessive. He is very protective of his loved ones, and if they seem to show interest in other people, he can become jealous and untrusting. He also expects his significant other to behave in a certain way, and can be quite critical if they don't meet his expectations. He can be quite stubborn as well, and won't easily bend to the wants or needs of his significant other if they clash with his own ideals.

•He's dedicated, passionate, and shows love in every possible way. He'll surprise with thoughtful gestures like flowers and gifts on special occasions, or just because. He'll go out of his way to make them happy, whether it's cooking their favorite meal or spending an entire day devoted just to them. When they're having a bad day, he'll be there to comfort and reassure them, always lifting their spirits. No matter what difficulties or problems come his way, he'll never fail to make his lover smile.

• Saigiku Jouno's good attitudes as a boyfriend includes his loyalty, dedication, and overall, his desire to please his lover. He always wants to make them happy and show that he loves them, whatever the cost, and he'll go to great lengths to do so. His passion for his lover is unmatched, and he is willing to give them his undivided attention and affection at any time. His efforts and dedication to being a great boyfriend is why many people swoon for him.

• But, he also can be overly possessive. If his lover even looks at another guy, or mentions something positive about a friend of the opposite gender, he can possibly feel jealous and overprotective towards them. While this can be seen as a good thing to some, it can prove to be quite an annoyance, especially if his lover wants to maintain their social life and friendships without him constantly hovering over them. Jouno should trust that his s/o loves him and would never cheat on him.

[therealslimshakespeare]

saw the kinky Julie Jean and Bucky post….so now I have to ask about Maureen and Gale haha 🤣

Oooh yes ok…

This one’s not quite as fluffy but, something that’s important to me is the way that the harrowing things you’ve been through, the struggles with self loathing, etc usually still remain in some way with most folks but in a healthy, trusting, totally transparent relationship, those tendencies -we will loosely call them kinks from here on out- can be explored, soothed and sometimes ameliorated or reinvented into something far kinder but just as hot for the person in question.

Yada yada yada…

Ok, the sexy stuff. Maureen’s kink is Gale Cleven, we know this, from the minute she met him she was entranced with both his beauty but also his strength of character which was entirely foreign to her in regards to men. The fact he disapproved of her and displayed it in almost parental fashion was exotic to her, and very appealing and that got their wires crossed as Gale can understandably not relate to finding that paternal treatment hot. Plainly speaking, Maureen finds Gale’s cool, calm, collected masculinity drool worthy and she enjoys him wrangling her. Sexually that’s everything from gentle domming or spanking or simply making her eat her words while over stimulating her or forcing an apology out of her for her smartassery by edging her. They can be tender but they both like it a bit rough too, she particularly has such an ingrained habit of trying to provoke male attention so when Gale caves and gives it to her, even after years of marriage, it’s maddeningly hot to her, especially if he acts rather impulsively and takes her on the next available surface.

A hard no for her would be sex in the dark or anything that covers her eyes and nose, my girl got assaulted while in prison with a wet sack over her head after repeated drownings, she ain’t into breath play ever.

Gale Cleven’s kinks are also Maureen Kendeigh existing, Lbr, and the fact he’s not felt a boner for a woman besides her since his seventh grade teacher is—- it’s confusing and it’s delightful and it’s something he has to sort well into their marriage but the transparency they share is such that he feels fully known, and that alone -being known and still wanted, or maybe wanted even more- is dizzying for a perfectionist who used to have to earn any approval by immaculate behavior that went against much of his own drive and desires in all of life.

In their early years of marriage he struggles greatly with himself and guilt and internalized homophobia compounded by his own abuse and the abuse he was made to “participate” in at the camp. This added to how he already viewed his homosexuality is killer but it does mean there’s many ways he finds a massive amount of relief and enjoyment with Maureen and her rather unorthodox acceptance of everything. My boy loves playing husband, even if he’s not ready for it full time but he enjoys being a caretaker, he enjoys being a gentle dom and creating moments of gentle domesticity where she makes him feel like a real man. These are sexy times of pure passion and softness. Loves to call her Mrs Cleven during those times and remind her with a smile she’s his wife and so has to do what he wants her to do- which is to let him bend her over the counter top.

On the flip side they also enjoy some gender play, I think, of a variety. Gale is flicking through personalities like they’re clothes during this season and it might not be healthy but it’s hot and Maureen is always game, in a way it makes her feel like she’s in the army again, not just the ladylike Mrs Cleven when she’s taking it up the ass or has her fingers down Gale’s throat- because they do a lot of that, her boy can deepthroat those fingers and the fact they’re Maureen’s mangled ones does something to his brain while scratching his oral fixation.

Does he also often need a finger up the ass to stay hard in the early days? Also yes. He’s so sure he doesn’t, he’s appalled at the suggestion, the fact Maureen has to play wrestle him into letting her only makes his initial reaction all the stronger and…harder. And they let it lie and it becomes a thing. To be honest, these are times he enjoys being “used” in his own words.

After the last Nuremberg trials and his deposition, things get far better for them in many ways and they also decide to have children. At which point Daddy Cleven is so back and he’s gently pinning her wrists to the bed to fuck her again for the fifth time today because they’re trying for a baby, doesn’t she remember? and she’s gotta let her husband do what needs to be done. they’re both filthy and happy about it, it’s great.

Once they have kids I totally think they end up doing more spicy things out in nature just to be away, but it’s a picnic blanket sorta lovemaking.

Also. The face sitting/ pussy eating craze that starts in the stalag never dies. Ever. It is what it is.

[unhappytimeleaper]

Hii can I request yandere Mika hcs please?

requested by anonymous

Word Count; 4,200

Okay, so requests for just general headcanons are hard for me because usually there is just so much I could go off of. I tried my best to whittle down this to where it wasn’t overwhelming but still enough to capture the main points of what I wanted. I ended up cutting out some ideas because I couldn’t keep writing; I wanted to edit and finish this. I’m sorry. 

Also p.s. I’m a very small account with less than 150 followers. I only get notes occasionally, and I say this because I still regularly have minors interact, and I will instantly be able to see that and block you. I’m 100% aware the bigger accounts grow, the harder it can be for one person to check, but none of you are being sneaky, and I don’t care about likes/reblogs enough to let it slide. Go away. I don’t like you if you are actively a minor trying to save my work. If you can read all 4,000 words of this, you can read where it says don’t interact if under Seventeen. Even while getting ready to post this I had an ageless blog like my last post like no.  

Kagehira Mika; Unedited. Gender Neutral Reader.

CW; this is a clusterfuck. Yandere everything. Stalking, jealousy, unsolicited photography, stealing, manipulation, violence [against Mika, not reader], isolation, potential kidnapping, power imbalances, paranoia, other characters enabling yandere’s actions, and dismissal of feelings. Some moments can be read with lewd intentions, though never explicitly stated. Seriously it just has it all.

This blog is 17+ please have your age in your bio or tagged; any ageless blog and below the age asked for will be blocked at the end of the week.

For a general setup, Mika is. Well, a contradiction in many ways. The best way to put it is just as how others describe him, cat-like. It’s never to say Mika thinks he’s above you, consistently battling himself with the idea of being human over something like a doll, but for someone so ‘below’ you metaphorically, he pulls the strings. In the case of you, his extent of creepy actions, his stalking tendencies, and overall jealousy trap you in the strings of the marionette this time. For someone so below you as he claims, why does he have the power? Why does he not listen to you if he claims you have control over him? Cat-like— pets who rely on humans to bend to their needs and take care of them but still are more of a type to “run a household” rather than wait for the owner to come to them. 

A good example is, say, isolation; you explain to him keeping you alone with little interaction outside of him (and maybe minimal time with Shu or Ritsu) isn’t good; it isn’t healthy. Just a little time together in public, you don’t even need to go alone, just need to stretch and feel the bare sun on your skin even for a few moments; he loves you, right? He cares for you, so this would be better for both of you. He’s so weak-willed and eager to please you for a moment you think he’d easily comply, but it doesn’t work. It sends him more into a panicked frenzy, clinging and cuddling, making all sorts of claims that move too fast to rebuttal. It’s dizzying, and in the end, he remains the one truly in power despite his remarks about being only for your needs. 

Of course, the main this is despite his contradictions in power, overall, he does genuinely often seek to please you. Make no mistake that despite being the one with the upper hand in terms of your future, you still can easily live a life of semi-normalcy if you play your cards right. And even if things get to the extreme, like fully isolated, Mika will bend fate to bring you nearly anything you would ask for. And if he can’t get it, he’ll try anything he can to make it. 

Now to argue, the reasoning behind Mika’s tendencies is pretty apparent. The rooted abandonment issues are a crucial factor, it drives most of his fears and creates logic as to why he feels the need to lock onto people so intensely. He’s a rooted stalker, a mix between being extremely open with it and completely hidden, taking photos constantly without your knowledge, willing to collect all sorts of trash or items he can get his hands on, break-in, and more. There basically isn’t a stone unturned where Mika hasn’t been. Even more part of this comes in despite a fear of talking to strangers; he will threaten them for being ‘too friendly’ and say you two are together even if you aren’t, almost always driving people away from you. This can be found in Mika’s delusional nature of having conversations which he thinks are you giving advice or others telling him, much like how he fantasizes about conversations with Shu when looking for answers to projects. Some of this is attributed to Mika being well aware his emotions are almost always in control. 

Regarding you and others interacting, Mika primarily runs on autopilot. He might not even recall what he says to them; it’s a mix of emotion and adrenaline running the show. The final reason for his tendencies is trying to break out of being a doll. He does have feelings, wants, and desires that he should work to fulfill rather than always being just a doll told everything. It’s a lot of weight and pressure, and one of the things that comes with that is the human desire for love. For attention and validation on a deeper scale, something that the human side eventually craves from you. No longer does he just want to be a doll that falls into the corner waiting to be molded; he knows that as a human, these are things that come with it— even if profoundly misplaced. And as away the human side doesn’t take away from his more meek, submissive attitude that came with a doll mentality, at least not entirely, but it is what makes him realize more the nature of his desires. 

And as mentioned, Mika is… well, gross. Not in a literal sense, okay, maybe slightly literally in the thoughts and extreme hoarding of items he might be willing to take, but it’s more than that. Mika pushes the acceptable bounties; he has little and runs purely on emotions and whims— they control him. His actions are horrendously creepy at times, and his delusions push him to do things that just come off as disturbing. The tragic downside is ES isn’t an ordinary place with ordinary people. The majority of those around him come off more as enablers or too busy to care in the hustle of idol life. Examples being are Shu, Ritsu, and Arashi, all being helpless enablers to Mika and doing little to genuinely help you if it means Mika’s happiness. Cosmic Productions doesn’t care; as long as Valkyrie brings in revenue, then you’re just collateral damage and other companies at ES have little awareness of the reality going in the department. Not to mention I don’t think Crazy:B or Eden has the best members to speak on the subject, with 2wink being the most reasonable you could go to, but often they have enough going on it’s hard to seek solace in them.

And the last main general note is that while things would never be easy and life would always have some level of undertones of there being something wrong seeping from under the surface, Mika is one where you could get away with not being kidnapped and isolated. This doesn’t remove any general problems or underlying creepiness, it might even make it worse, but the idea of available yet moderated freedom might be better than nothing. Nearly all of your attention still needs to go to Mika, and if you would be to play the role of a partner to him, having the chance to still semi-function outside of being locked in some rooms might be a better alternative. This does stems from the fact Mika is willing to bend for you, as long as you comply with parts of his affection even for show. It also doesn’t dilute any aspects like stalking or stealing. But unless there is only full-out rejection of everything, would Mika likely turn to Shu or Ritsu for advice which would supply kidnapping as an alternative route (those little shits). It’s not easy for Mika to transport you to the dorm or Shu’s apartment to keep you locked up, and as mentioned, once isolated, getting Mika to let up and let you leave is nearly nonexistent even if you begin to return his advances (both for show or genuine). Overall, this is to say kidnapping is never a guaranteed ending with Mika, unlike with many others but not ever out of the question either. It can come very suddenly and always a looming presence if you aren’t willing to give into Mika’s fantasies. 

Okay, so that is the central portion. Now some more miscellaneous items. 

For one, Mika genuinely doesn’t mind if you use violence against him. Not saying he wants it necessarily; it’s not some masochistic desire to be hit, kicked, and generally beaten by you. But it doesn’t serve as a functional way to get him to stop or go away. He is essentially any attention is still attention. You’re mistaken if you think that while he is crying, clawing at your legs and hips for attention, a quick slap or kick to get him to let go will work. It might somehow many him latch on harder, claiming that it’s okay, you can do it again, it helps you calm down, just let him stay. Keep giving him the attention, the validation. And even worse this behavior is something Mika is willing to do in public if pushed or called out enough. Any terms of thinking you’re abandoning or leaving him creates an overdrive in him, quickly transforming into someone willing to beg to keep you around. In public, it’s made worse because not only does he look like the one being hurt by you— he’s an idol. Well-known one too, and if something terrible happens to him, it will only come back and hurt you. Either through die-hard fans or the company scolding you. Violence not only spurs Mika more but damages your livelihood in the bigger picture, making it null any tactic to help with the burden of Mika’s tendencies. 

However, this extends to one important thing. Your actions don’t really hurt Mika? Even on a physical level. It’s well noted Mika has an extremely high pain tolerance and that it would take a lot for him to acknowledge something hurting him in a way that would temporarily take him out. He doesn’t mind being physically hurt not only because it has some power dynamics and he’s doing anything to please you, but even in the case there is that contraction of him still having the upper hand. He gives you the permission to hit or kick him, likely because he has an awareness of being able to take it without it limiting his hold on you and still giving that outlet to you. Even if these are subconscious choices, it’s unsettling how much control he still has between his physicality benefits, idol career, and connections. Mika truly is a powerhouse in this way, and violence to him practically cannot solve anything as a means of escape, even if he offers it as stress relief or punishment to himself. 

Another big thing for Mika is forgetting the past and focusing on the future. There was before you, and then there is now. Anything before does not matter, and in a sense, he sort of expects this from you as well. Ex-partners, ex-crushes, ex-situation-ships; none of those matter now that he is here, and you better feel the same of these things being ‘dead.’ Photos or any other sentimental item need to be wiped away, and your mind shouldn’t need to wander back to them because you have something more now and forever. This idea of focusing on the future/now also relates to how many delusions and ideas for how things will work out between you in the long term. Marriage, starting a family, domestic life as a whole— Mika spends much of his time picturing and creating pieces that inspire him of this future as well as daydreaming of what life could become no longer attached to his past. 

Some more quick round-head canons; Mika will fill up notebooks and writing your name and his name. Pretty much any cross-over you can think of. Just your name with hearts, your name and his name with hearts, your first name and his last name, his first name and your last name, a teased ship name given from Arashi— the list can go on. It’s scribbled messily, and other times written with such extreme care. It’s only loose papers and trash, on his sketch designs and doodled with his finger on tables. Not only does he do it as a practice of his handwriting and the love of seeing your name written with that, but the combinations he can make feel like a validation of the closeness he has. Much like any early crush, it’s some comfort level of daydreaming— regardless of the actual proximity you have with one another. Also yes, he will lose loose pages and if you don’t know what he’s doing it’s very creepy the first few times. Or hundred. The amount of times he writes your names together is beyond comfort; very heavily boarding on obsessive. 

Mika is also not great at conversations, with mostly everyone but the awkwardness is pushed even more with you. There is too much pressure, and his feelings run in such high control that it often comes out as a mix of self-deprecating, worshipping you, and trying to act like a normal mess. It’s almost always awkward even if you try to ease him and are kind, and it does kinda become worse the longer it goes on because this is when his stalking, photography, and niche personal things become apparent in conversations. If you didn’t think he was stalking you beforehand or at least didn’t catch him, you’d be given many hints the more he talks to you. This extends from the fact he does everything possible to get materials and content he knows interests you. Even if you think it’s something knows one would know you like, Mika does somehow and will in passing bring it up in the weirdest form of trying to have a casual conversation. Books, CDs, and TV shows and stuff are all a part of his hoarding connection about you simply because you like it.  Even if it never would be something he’d look up on his own, he’d do anything to connect and relate even more to you. There never is any proof you can’t call him out other than having suspicions which, once again, little to anyone would take seriously, but you can’t help but feel Mika knows more than he is truly letting on. 

Will do any and everything for you if he can; carrying items, buying you things, cleaning stuff— of course, be careful asking him for this because he might take advantage of you letting him get this close to such personal tasks— but there never is anything he doesn’t offer to do. Idol work might get in the way, though, he can’t neglect his job, but any other time he is on your heels, waiting to do anything he can for you. And sure, at first, it’s nice. It lifts some burdens or comes off as Mika being Mika offering to give more than needed to anyone. But buying you things often comes off with a strange energy radiating off of them, even if there is seemingly nothing wrong. Him cleaning or doing simple domestic tasks, such as laundry, ends up with some things being missing or damaged. You notice so many other weird things in your apartment if he offers to clean. And carrying items,  while seemly harmless, still just makes your stomach churn. He fully just shows up out of nowhere on the most random shopping tasks offering his help and pushing closer and closer to you. What once was Mika feeling like his strange but overall kind, sweet nature stepping up to help an overworked staff member turns exhausting, skin-crawling offer. Even if he usually looks all sweet and innocent offering. Damn, the fact he does have some cuteness charm regardless of his actions. 

Arashi coming in clutch again being an enabler to Mika!! Upon teaching Mika about selfies and the momentum of photos… Mika gets a little too on board with this. He takes photos whenever he can, both blurry and crisp, highly focused or landscape of you, anywhere and everywhere. There are so many pictures he has and collects, often finding it hard to delete any one of them because there is something special attached to each one. Selfies and other photos he can get with you, either to your knowledge or without it are probably the most important to his collections. The second ones are those that either are from dates or situations that Mika dates. He is willing to print them off and keep them all over, even having dedicated spaces and boxes of printed photos or simply made posters. There would probably be some specific photo he becomes horrendously attached to as well, much like having one of Shu he constantly uses to talk to or seek advice from. 

The reason to account for the photos is because, as I’ve touched on, Mika is a filthy hoarder. He will legitimately take whatever he can get his hands on if he thinks it has some value to you. While I think depending on the item, particular trash isn’t seen as valuable or limited value others have much more. For example, plastic utensils aren’t valued at much; you used it once and then got rid of them, which has very little value to you. But say a silverware from your kitchen, chopsticks/spoon/whatever you use daily, has that value level and is worth wanting to keep for his own use. If you wear makeup, an empty lipstick/chapstick tube will be more sentimental or valued than a used tissue. This can also be found in the fact he’s mainly sharing spaces. While he still is a hoarder and does his best to keep his collection out of the main sight or in a place that isn’t easily accessed, there is always a chance someone could come to clean out those spaces. Something like a tissue is more likely to get loaded and thrown away, while Mika could better justify a chapstick holder as being able to be kept. This doesn’t change the fact that he is able and willing to collect a lot of gross things, such as well willing to have a container of bath water of yours if he could easily get it or an old notebook you might forget about. Even if it’s just work notes, he’d take it. And Mika might sometimes try to get rid of parts of his collection until he can secure a long-term and connected relationship with you, such as living together; it’s hard for him to part with anything of yours. These items are fucking everywhere too. His dorm, Shu’s apartment, the sewing station, and his area at CosPro. You might even see things you thought you lost just lying around and be able to “steal” them back with how prolific his hoarding is scattered. 

Clothing is the one thing; sadly, you will probably never get back, or at least if you could not in its original form. Mika loves, even obsessively, uses scraps and parts of your clothing in his. Even in the costumes for Valkyrie if he can, so there is a piece of you on stage with him. His use for upcycling extends back to his past, needing to take clothes and items from the trash to even have things of his own to wear, but now it feels much more special. This is rewriting all of the stigma and pain he carried of having nothing more than trash clothes— discarded by people just as he was. Sure, this clothes was stolen and didn’t have your permission to use, but it has the comfort woven into its threads. It smells like you and has the texture from how you cared for it when you washed it. It has the stains and memories of you, the feeling of someone being so loved by you it’s clearly ready to be thrown out finally, so it’s perfect if he repurposes it. He never takes too much, and if you have a clear favorite item Mika knows not to take it; maybe steal it from the wash pile and use it as a pillow cover for a bit, but always have it returned as well. At that time he’d fantasy the domestic life of being together, where he could openly wear his upcycled material of your clothes patched together [and you can wear them too!]. Or where he can take your clothes and wear them without shame or worry of getting them back on time, and the comments you’d make seeing him in your stuff. All of the fantasies turn him bright red, and even the next day, when you greet him, he looks a little more flushed than usual around you.

However yes, many things go missing, but they are often just as much replaced. Simple things are replaced with Mika spending his own money and then finding ways to either customize or make it so the item is uniquely tied to the two of you. Certain things also have trackers in them, but most are just decorative in some way. You remember how you lost your favorite pair of chopsticks when you brought your own lunch that one day. Weirdly enough the next day a new pair ended up in your bag but one bejeweled on the handle to match a particular sewer’s aesthetic while the other matched yours. Or hair clips that you once got as decorative jokes for a photo you and your friends had been planning; you figured you just misplaced them but these new ones you found are nothing like the previous ones aesthetic… If you look too long in a shop at clothing or accessories Mika might not always be able to buy them due to expenses buts he’s well quick to make them, even with the added benefit of it being tailored now specifically to how you prefer. They always end up at your desk so neatly packaged, many coworkers assume it’s perhaps brands trying to get cozy with you for future deals with idol groups but these aren’t the same as what you saw in the window. No, these are too perfect for you to be just any run-of-the-mill store item. The even more unsettling part is how this person managed to get your measurements so spot on if not for measuring you in your sleep. 

There is also one specific way Mika would get caught for the more,, creepy actions. You’d know he could be a bit of a stalker. He has his moments where it’s oblivious he’s following you or others but those always come off more like a kicked puppy trying to follow someone home rather than malicious. Like he wants to interact, but internal conflict holds him back so much he forgets where he is until he is slightly too far behind and stumbles to keep up. If he really wants to stalk, Mika can keep himself hidden. There are other times all his other more ‘bizarre’ actions are qualified as Mika being Mika, like being fatigued after bouts of practice and finding his way to your desk out of habit in hopes to see you rather than going and getting medical attention/rest, or coming to hover around your desk for inspiration like a cat. If you aren’t there, usually you see cheap candies on your desk as a reminder he was there and is probably off looking for you or went back to the workstation much more disappointed than before. For the most part conversation with Mika, you might not lead to believe anything is deeply wrong with his infatuation levels. He’s always spoken weirdly with his doll-like commentary and the idea of letting others “control” him such as Shu and you. Or that his comments tend to come from a lack of understanding rather than outright trying to harm, so you do your best to guide him in topics. You’ve always known his emotional state can be complex, and his childhood likely made it hard to process feelings, resulting him them dominating his sense of self and backfiring into making them more unsettling than maybe he intended [of course while Mika’s perception of the events being vastly different]. All of these would change when you awake in the middle of the night hearing stumbling in your apartment. The first few times you hear a thump or grunt, you believe it’s just your sleepy brain making up stuff. It’s unsettling, and you always can feel your heart rate spike, but you don’t have anything to assume there is something wrong. But it often continues and you’re getting worried. Everything comes rushing into a close of an era when you manage to shake yourself awake one night, hearing a whine from the floor by your bed only to see a mass of dark hair and clothes. None other than Mika, watching you in your sleep— or well trying. 

See while Mika would love to use the nighttime to stalk around your apartment and get things done… his case of night blindness makes it much harder. Walking into walls or furniture, tripping over a bag that wasn’t always there, or simply leaning in too close that he bonked his head into your trying to look at your face before diving under your bed as to tousle around. It never really hurts, but he does let out a startled noise, or the falling is enough to cause a loud sound. But now, you’ve caught him in the act. And many questions are bound to follow in the morning, ones neither of you can escape from. Finding out Mika’s habits won’t change the outcome for him too much; what will is how you choose to follow but it doesn’t matter. He’ll find a way to be around in your life more no matter how you respond. 

[derekscorner]

Fated Rantings: Seiba Part 2

Zero Seiba, all Tragedy

For my second part of my Fate Zero rambling I decided to dedicate it too Saber herself because my first Seiba post was after the 2006 Fate Stay Night and mostly about her.

Am I obsessed? Yes, all jokes aside, I am to a degree because I grew up liking those king arthur legends. I knew very little as a child but I always loved a King Arthur or Robin Hood story.

And for reasons I won't fully reiterate I do find fascination (and humor) in how accurate Fate is to Arthurian legends despite gender bending the central figure himself.

Saber is very tragic due to these things. Lived as a man in an age that won't let women rule, chosen by a sword to be king, wielding another sword (alongside a holy spear and scabbard) that rendered her ageless, and raised on the idealism of the perfect king.

Her life was full of sacrifice and convoluted magic. When someone like Iskander says she was a "little girl who couldn't chase butterflies or fall in love" or when someone says she was a king who could not understand the hearts of men there is some truth to it.

In a lot of ways she was set up for failure from the start albeit not by intent.

Stark Differences

If you've read the first post then you're likely wondering what else I could say. If you haven't, here: Seiba Part One

I do not think you'll need it but if you're the type to see this and immediately try and draw me into "they treat that way cause WOMEN" then read it. It may not be to your standards but I explain my draw to this character well and my respect for her depiction. I also freely admit that I believe people project quickly at the cost of critical thought but that's a separate rant.

What is relevant here is how does Zero hurt or help how Saber is portrayed in Fate Stay Night... which is hard to answer because every fate work is it's own timeline. (including Fate/Zero)

When you watch Fate Zero you're seeing a slightly (or perhaps greatly) alternative take on the 4th Grail War that Saber mentions in Fate Stay Night.

Her own memories of the 4th Grail war aren't complete. Servants aren't supposed to remember things from one summoning to another either.

Even so I think Zero adds to her. It may be differing timelines but the character is the same at their core....I wonder how many I just pissed off by saying that.

While Fate Zero is praised it also has people who dislike her depiction within it. The Saber we see is very staunch about chivalry and honor and so on. To some this makes her seem overly idealistic compared to her other depictions.

It can even seem overly childish compared to her own past and how she used soldiers in warfare. I won't even disagree on that front, this Saber is idealistic.

But I think that is with intent. She was raised by and fell to the flawed idealism of mankind. Plus, I think that was to parallel her master Kiritsugu and his wife Irisviel.

They too were idealistic on what the grail could actually do and servants always have some form of parallel to their summoner. In FSN she parallels Shirou's heroic complex and sacrificial tendencies.

In Fate Zero she parallels Kiritsugu's flawed idealism.

Point A to B

If we're running on the assumption that FSN and Fate Zero had near identical events then I'd also argue that this depiction of her is meant to show how she got to her depiction in FSN.

Zero shows us how others such as Kirei, Gilgamesh, or Kiritsugu got to where they are. It only makes sense that this had similar effects on Saber who remembers some vague aspects of the 4th War.

In Fate Zero she tells her fellow kings that she wishes to save Britain but in FSN she wishes to undo the sword selection itself. In Fate Zero she a bit more laid back compared to her serious to business take in FSN.

Even if she doesn't fully remember that 4th War it scarred her like the others. The idea that she was a bad king and other negative ideals started to internalize somewhat. Now, we all know there's only some truth in those statements but what we know vs what she believes is different.

I am not saying Fate Zero did it well but I am arguing that this may have been the intention. Her acceptance and growth in FSN's Fate Route benefits from it I'd argue.

It's not necessary since FSN can be read/watched as is but I do appreciate the attempt. I do not consider Saber naive but I do think she was made into a king based on naive ideals.

A King that doesn't know mens Hearts

Another line that I've seen some disdain for. I do not fully agree with it either but there is something to be said for the few times there's some truth in the statement.

The show makes Lancelot the pinpoint of that negative thought process but I feel that's where the other fans get offended. Yes, she didn't fully understand her knights or people but that's more to do with her denying herself her own humanity throughout life.

When I see that fight I saw no confusion on Lancelot's part. He fully understood Arthur, his issue was that he couldn't handle that truth. He deserved the punishment that Guinevere was given in his mind.

Arthur was a perfect king for a horribly imperfect people.

No, the moment the show highlights truth in that line is with Kiritsugu. They never got along and after episode 16 I did not think that highly of him either. He did things so dirty in that episode that I had a visibly disgusted reaction, I can only imagine what she felt as he ruined a fight between two true knights.

She could never understand her master and that was the recipe for ruin from the start. She said it herself in the finale how could "she ever understand a man through three command spells"

The Banquet of Kings

I can't end this without mentioning the infamous Banquet of Kings. The start of Saber's spiral into self doubt.

There's a lot of talk about this scene, the good and ills of it, I wrote a lot about it when talking about Iskander in the previous post. That's not a plug like the first link, it's just a scene with that much to discuss.

For Saber specifically, this was a banquet with demeaning outcomes. Her role as a king was discarded quiet harshly albeit for two differing reasons.

For Gilgamesh she is just a fool. To him she becomes an interesting toy to objectify and own, all the negatives that people get from that talk come from him. That is within his character though, I do not say that as an excuse but because there's no other outcome.

For Gilgamesh to even respect Iskandar as a king/conqueror by the end of Zero is more than I actually expected of him. In his mind he IS the king and anyone else is a joke.

Iskandar was a bit more nuanced. He never disrespected Saber for being female nor as a warrior. She does lose his respect as a fellow king but only after he hears her wish. To him, it's an insult to all those that served her to undo their work and sacrifices.

He also, correctly, identifies her as someone raised trapped in ideals that didn't get a chance to be a person. He words it as "a little girl that didn't get to chase butterflies or fall in love" but the thing he finds sad about her is that lack of choice period.

Ultimately, there is one other key factor that the two actually agree on. Although they differ on why a king stands above other men they do at least agree that they do so.

Saber, in contrast, has a less archaic view that kings serve the people. Now is this wrong? That's hard to say since I'm from an age where monarchy is largely dead.

However, I do think Iskandar is right to the extent that kings inspire. They don't always lead or inspire for good reasons but there is a core logic of a leader present.

I also agree that the lack of childhood or basic human wants hurt her reign. You can make all the jokes you want about a 35yr old woman acting childish in FSN or Ataraxia, that makes sense to me and, it's something she needed more of.

If she had more of that core human experience earlier she may have been able to lead Camelot to a less tragic end. If nothing else, perhaps more of the ones that should've understood her would've.

One of the better retroactive connections here is her accepting things in FSN's Fate Route. She no longer desires to undo it all finding value in her and her comrades efforts. Something that only comes from the normalcy she gains from living with Shirou.

Conclusions?

All in all what I mean to say is that I appreciated her depiction in Zero. It's not flawless but I do see some of the things reflected in her original depiction. I see the attempt to explain some of it.

More than anything else, it helps me appreciate more her growth in FSN's story. All she really needed was someone to let her be a person rather than an ideal king or weapon. (like kiritsugu)

I have no deeper meaning, I just wanted to ramble and discuss the banquet scene. Also, no, I did not forget the amazing Iri & Saber dynamic. I just do not know what to say.

It was wholesome, Saber rocks a suit, and never let Iri drive. Goodnight everybody!

=====================

For my other experiences with Fate go here: https://derekscorner.tumblr.com/tagged/fated-rantings

[literatureloverx]

Hello,

I have an interest in Greek mythology as well, so I don’t mind the discussion in the slightest. It is cool that she is both an agricultural deity and a chthonic one: life and death. Seeing how her absence from Earth is associated with winter, I find it somewhat distantly related to your name “Snow White” as well.

You are not bothering people just by discussing your problems with them. If they are unable to support you or don’t care, it is on them to communicate that. Also, even though you believe your struggles are comparatively “not that bad,” that does not make them any less worthy of addressing if it bothers you. However, I am glad you seek support from your family and friends. Do you feel that being independent and primarily trying to solve issues on your own has been effective thus far? As someone who also does not typically seek others for help, oftentimes it can be lonely or inefficient.

I would say I don’t have nearly as much pride or impulsiveness as Anakin, but I find his intense fear of loss and subsequent obsession in regard to Padmé relatable. He is a fascinating character and somehow both extremely smart and childishly naïve in some aspects. In all honesty, I think I share more traits with Obi-Wan, only less morally upright and more inclined to bend or break rules.

I hear you are learning Russian (for the accent)? Knowing so many as many languages as you do is impressive. How do you typically approach learning new languages?

My (joking) guide to a Slavic accent:

1. Watch Victor Arcane clips.

2. Repeat "Glorious Evolution", "viral bronchitus", and "Victor Nation: how we feeling?" in his voice until you get it right.

I hope you feel better soon,

— 🫀 Cœur anon

(Also, I don’t find it creepy, it is clear that I look at your blog as well, after all. I am not a medical student - although I could have been/kind of wanted to be - but I do like organs. I am curious about what academic or professional fields you are in, if you are comfortable sharing.)

You have such a unique mind; I hope you’re aware of it. I was initially fixated on the pomegranate and apple symbolism, but you’ve drawn a much more thoughtful and logical connection with the winter parallel. Do you always think this way? Very impressive.

Thank you so much for caring—it truly means a lot to me.♥️ Most of the time, I’m able to work through things on my own if I can approach them logically and with a calm perspective. But when it comes to emotional struggles, it’s a different story. I often get stuck in analysis paralysis or feel completely overwhelmed, and I can’t always pull myself out of that on my own.

I also hesitate when it comes to trusting others’ advice because I’m not always convinced they fully understand the heart of the issue. So… it can feel a bit isolating at times. How is it for you, though?

I hope also that you have people in your life who can truly understand and support you during tough times. I can imagine you’d rather share those thoughts with someone closer to you than with a random stranger on the internet. But if you ever do feel like talking, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I’d be honoured to listen to anything you want to share. (And no, this isn’t me mirroring your words, I promise—though I do hope it doesn’t come across that way, haha.) So yes, overall, I agree that it can feel lonely or inefficient.

I can see why you might find Obi-Wan relatable (does the humour factor in as well, by the way?). Personally, I feel I relate more to Qui-Gon Jinn. I’ll keep it gender-neutral here, as there aren’t many female characters in the prequels. Besides, the women in Star Wars often seem so self-assured and authoritative, which doesn’t feel particularly representative of me. That said, you’re always welcome to suggest another character if you think someone else might suit me better.

I actually started learning Russian because I wanted to read Russian works in their original language someday, but… it doesn’t seem like a realistic dream so far, unfortunately. I’ve been really inconsistent lately. At this rate, it might take me a couple of years, haha. Thank you very much for the compliment, but I don’t think I’m particularly gifted at learning new languages. I’ve just been watching a lot of movies in the language I’m trying to learn, which worked for me with French (though it didn’t help with my inconsistency… but anyway, I can at least understand conversations, right?). The same isn’t really possible with Russian, though, because there’s censorship and, generally, a lack of Russian media here in Germany due to the current situation. I hope that’s at least a little helpful.

The reason I’m trying to fake a Russian accent is simply because I find it attractive. I actually tried following your guide to a Slavic accent. Believe it or not, it works. Hahaha.

Regarding my academic field—yes, I’m comfortable sharing, and thank you again for being so sensible. I originally wanted to study psychology because I’ve always been passionate about it, and I hope to eventually become a psychologist. However, due to some issues with matriculation, I would have had to wait about four semesters to enroll. I could have attended another university, but that would have required moving, which wasn’t really an option for me. So, rather than doing nothing while waiting, I decided to matriculate in art history, as it made the most sense under the circumstances.

I’ve always had a strong interest in philosophy and art history as well, but psychology remains my primary focus. I’ll likely pursue it after completing my current studies. I’ll probably finish everything by the time I’m 30… so maybe finding a rich husband wouldn’t be such a bad idea after all. No responsibilities—it does sound rather appealing, doesn’t it? Hahaha.

Edit: I don’t think I’ve said this before—in fact, I checked and I really haven’t—but I genuinely like this letter format. It feels like receiving real letters, haha. Not many people do that here. Also, I’m actually curious about things regarding you too, but I’m not sure if I should ask since you’re quite discreet about yourself (and I can totally understand why), which is why I’m holding back a bit.

[princesssarisa]

For the Shipping & Fandom Ask:

7. What are your top five ships of all time?

16. What gif or screenshot most sums up your ship?

29. What’s your favorite fanfic AU scenario or setting?

7. I couldn't choose out of all media, so I'll pick a specific media. My top five ships of all time in the standard opera repertoire.

Figaro and Susanna (The Marriage of Figaro): Everyone's favorite comic opera couple. Two smart, witty, lively, funny people with different, complimentary forms of cleverness, Figaro's scheming and Susanna's presence of mind. They're utterly devoted to each other, and they work together to outwit the lustful Count and secure their wedding. They have their issues with jealousy and misunderstandings – and by modern standards, Figaro's Act IV misogyny aria and Susanna's violent streak aren't so funny – but they resolve them in the end with an ease that shows the strong foundation of their love.

Rodolfo and Mimí (La Bohéme): *sigh* It's very flawed. I've wanted to punch Rodolfo many times for the way he emotionally hurts Mimí in the months leading to their breakup, and their meeting scene in Act I has some consent issues. But something about them keeps drawing me back to them. It's clear that their love is true and mutual, and they share so much tenderness, warmth, poetry, and beautiful music, capped off with an achingly beautiful tragic ending. And they're both so easy to identify with; sometimes too much.

Tosca and Cavaradossi (Tosca): Another relationship that has its flaws, conflicts, and jealousy issues, but this one has a sense of dedication and stability through it all that others often lack. This is probably helped by the fact that they seem slightly older than other operatic lovers. (Realistically, I suppose they're probably in their 20s, but they always come across as more in their 30s to me.) Yet regardless of age, they still have plenty of passion, sensuality, tenderness, and romantic Puccini music to sing.

Norina and Ernesto (Don Pasquale): A sweet young pair of comic opera innamorati. Romantic Ernesto has more heart than brains, but cunning, playful Norina has enough brains for both of them, and despite their different personalities they mesh well together. I especially like the way they each emphasize how much they want the other to be happy. And when he sees her apparently about to marry his uncle, he doesn't act like a typical tenor and fly into a jealous rage, but just has a moment of shock and disbelief, but then is quickly made to see that it's a trick. For that alone he wins points!

Tamino and Pamina (The Magic Flute): A classic fairy tale pairing: two innocents who fall in Love at First Sight and prove willing to brave fire, floods, darkness, and death to be together. Their interactions are few, but Mozart's music makes their love truly felt. It's unfortunate that in Act II, Tamino figuratively pushes Pamina aside for the sake of Sarastro's trials, but at least on some level he does it for Pamina, to prove he's worthy of her hand. And in the climactic scene, not only do they finally unite as they should, but Pamina is the one who guides Tamino through the deadliest trials.

It wasn't easy to decide on these five ships. They all have their problematic aspects, but most of the other operatic couples I could think of are either much worse or much more boring! It's amazing how dysfunctional most of the romances in the standard opera repertoire really are!

16. I'll share a photo for each of the ships listed above, in order.

29. Call it problematic, but I like gender-bending. I like examining how the characters' social roles would be different in their specific time periods and places if they were gender-bent, and how this might alter the story. (Social roles, not personalities – I don't assume their personalities would be very different because I don't do gender essentialism.) And I like breaking gender stereotypes, which is typically the result.

My unpublished novel An Eternal Crown is a gender-bent retelling of The Magic Flute. I've loved reimagining Tamino and Pamina as Sarisa and Zeran, respectively, and fleshing out their love story from this new starting point.

@leporellian, @tuttocenere

[dragonseeds]

ok would love to hear more of your daemyra emma thoughts because i do see the vision and i'm kinda obsessed

yesss i’m glad you see it too because the parallels are driving me insane currently.

emma to me is pseudo incest already—they hated jesus because he told the truth, etc—which is referenced most obviously in clueless when they made josh cher’s step-brother instead of her almost brother-in-law and basically halved the age difference to make it more palatable. i’m pretty sure emma and knightley have the same age difference as daemon and rhaenyra in both books. it’s like sixteen years? so rhaenyra grows up with daemon but not really, and he’s absolutely her gothic uncle but he’s also an older brother figure to her. i think it’s more apparent with daemyra because they’re initially positioned as rivals who are both desperate for viserys’ approval—they’ll never be his son, but they have both been his heir—and they recognize that in each other and help each other make peace with that and occasionally hurt each other with it. when viserys chooses rhaenyra it takes daemon a minute, like he has some Behaviors and crushing realizations, but ultimately he loves her, loves his family, bends the knee to HER. it reminds me of mr. knightley’s understanding of emma’s relationship with her father and how he agrees to stay with her, in her home, because he loves and respects them both despite traditional social conventions. it’s like… the ultimate fun sexy messed up power dynamic to me because despite the gender inequality, both rhaenyra and emma have a level of power and privilege that most women wouldn’t. the imbalance is still there, but there are so many extra levels to it and negotiations within the relationship to play with. especially when you factor in both of their gender issues, which are also tied up in viserys.

aside from that, it’s just vibes. rhaenyra and emma are such similar characters to me! spoiled and entitled when young, high-handed, but clever and charming and deeply loving, willing to learn and grow from their mistakes—motherless and tied up in their relationships with their father. whereas daemon like. couldn’t be more different than mr. knightley, outside of them both being jealous pathetic bitches, but still rhaenyra idealizes him the same way emma does. because they just like each other! they’re old friends and family and they push each other and challenge each other; they have their own language and way of speaking, their own world within the world. it’s a crazy level of intimacy and chemistry, like it genuinely makes me insane?? i love that daemyra explores the darker aspects of such a relationship—i mean it would be impossible not to given the succession struggles and war and dynastic incest, but specifically daemon takes advantage of his access to rhaenyra when she’s younger in a way mr. knightley never does with emma and never would do (which always reads as a power fantasy to me, esp when coupled with emma’s wealth and the relative independence it brings her: she is safe, she has always been safe; daemon and rhaenyra are really just a different more dangerous exploration of this, almost at the other end of the spectrum)—but they’re still also very sweet and indulgent and comfortable with each other. fucked up and interesting and i love that they get to have that for while by sort of stepping into another genre for a moment before everything falls apart partially due to their own batshit horrible decision making and they destroy each other.

[chenqing9]

Another essay. Subject: Queerness in Yiddish Writing.

I just read a story by Isaac Bashevis Singer (1902-1991, Warsaw-New York City) with a Gay/Trans character. Singer is well-known for writing Yentl (1983) one of the most classic Jewish gender-bending tales, and has always been a wild card in many ways. But something about this undeniably queer story hits different and nothing in the world could make me feel better as a person who awkwardly bridges those worlds.

The story (called ‘Disguised’ in English) is a little questionable by today’s standards and what’s been written about it has not always been gentle. From a modern secular perspective it may be hard to understand the ways in which it’s radical. Some people have felt that it’s meant to be funny and is even homophobic. But I really, really don’t think so. Hear me out. If you want.

Singer was very aware of variations from gender and sexual norms within the societies he moved through. He lived much of his life in New York City but sets this story in a shtetl like the one he grew up in, where the characters follow a religious/cultural code and have very limited options outside of that (again, this is similar to Yentl.) After the main character (Temerl’s) husband Pinchosl vanishes without a trace, she goes in search of him either to determine what happened (if he died) or to ask for a divorce (yes, only the husband can grant a divorce, sigh…) When she does find Pinchosl, (he) has become the wife of a man in another town, (his) lover from the yeshiva (religious school.)

Here’s naturally where it gets interesting. Singer never changes Pinchosl’s pronouns, despite the fact that (he) lives full-time as a woman. I wonder if this were written now whether that would change and honestly I think it would which is why Pinchosl’s pronouns are female from here on entirely based on my opinion. To be honest, as Pinchosl couldn’t live as an openly gay man in this society, this may have been the only alternative for the two lovers. So here I go making assumptions on the work of a dead author. (I’m sorry Isaac if I misgender your character when you aren’t here to let us know your intentions.)

The author’s sympathetic treatment of the character is what gets me. Pinchosl admits to 1) Being in love with Elkonah since before their marriage but being unable to tell anyone, 2) Removing (herself) and Elkonah from their community based on Talmudic law, 3) Knowing that (she) risks both excommunication and death for living this lifestyle in this time and place, and finally 4) Believing that (she) and Elkonah are bound for Gehenna (the concept of Hell popularized in Eastern European Judaism. This really sucks to read honestly but becomes important I think- especially to readers in the communities he is writing to.)

I kind of live for Temerl and Pinchosl having tea:

“This was no longer the modest, bashful Pinchosl she remembered… (she) even joked and smiled - something (she) had never done in former times.” I mean…?

“They were sitting and drinking like two sisters.” …??! Love this?

Temerl gets the divorce papers and swears to Pinchosl never to tell the truth during her lifetime. It’s only on her deathbed that she can tell it, which is supposedly how we as the readers know the tale. And just as we’re thinking the story is over Singer does what he does best- throws us a line. Temerl is dying, and she opens her eyes, smiles, and says, “Perhaps I will meet this madman once again in Gehenna.” And I’m going to be 100%, that tore my heart out because what does she mean?? That… could be so many things. Acknowledgement of her own deviations? Solidarity? Or just irony?

All I know is I think about it now all the time.

All. The time.

[juniperdugong]

Couple Costumes 97s ver.

What you guys would wear as a couple on Halloween and how they react!! || 95s || 96s || 97s || Maknae line || A/N: I tried to make these examples as inclusive as possible, if you don't like that THEN GET OUT! Also, the characters or costumes I mention DO NOT correlate to the boys' personalities and this is all just for some silly Halloween fun! I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE ART, all credit goes to their respective artists!

Mingyu The Frankensteins/The Munsters

Does he want to dress up? No, not necessarily. Will he for you? Oh yeah absolutely! Takes little to no convincing on his end but he might sulk a little because he's slightly embarrassed. But past that initial embarrassment boy howdy does he have suggestions!

No questions asked. He is getting you guys some well-made costumes and sparing no expense and works very hard to impress you tbh. Lowkey I think he's the type to want to do more casual costumes that allude to what the original idea was while still being very stylish and modern. I definitely don't see him pulling out the stops to be especially accurate with the costume choices.

I would die to see you and him in a Frankenstein & Frankenstein's bride costume or Dr. Frankenstein & the Monster. Not only do I think it gives both of you the ability to kind've mix and match what you can be but it is also very recognizable even when done casually because it's so classic. That or go for Lily and Herman from the Munsters, which is essentially the same but y'know slightly different origins.

DK Alice in Wonderland/Sanrio

He's into it if you're into it. Doesn't mind dressing up, giving out candy, or going trick or treating, none of it fazes him and he's just so happy to be doing seasonal things with you. Even just the planning part of the costumes is done with the biggest smile on both of you're faces and it would 100% veer off into many different side conversations because you two are having way too much fun.

If you decide to go for more traditional Halloween costumes then I think any combo of Alice in Wonderland duos would work soooo well. Whether it's Mad Hatter & Alice, Cheshire Cat & White Rabbit, Queen of Hearts & the White Queen, of course, gender-bending where y'all see fit. Any of it would be so cute. Alternatively, I think he would be so down - maybe even being the one to convince you to do a Sanrio duo costume... Him as My Melody & you as Kuromi... Need tbh.

The8 Ghibli Films/The little prince & the rose/Jack & Sally

Listen... The8 and costumes. They are made for each other and I honestly don't think anything would look bad on him, he can pull off anything he wants. That being said I HAVE CONCEPTS!! And I need you to ride this one out with me...

Ghibli films. The one everyone goes to is obvi Sophie and Howl and don't get me wrong you and Hao would kill in that but I'm more thinking Ponyo's parents (Fujimoto & Granmamare), Sheeta & Pazu, Haru & The Prince, or maybe even Kiki & Tombo. Overall, I think Hao would kill in any Ghibli duo, romantic or not.

Jack & Sally/Just bring back Skellington Hao. Listen... I don't care if you dress up as the freaking mayor or Oogie goddamn Boogie, I desperately need to see Hao back in his Jack costume. Truly one of the best SVT costumes to have been worn. Period.

And then there's probably the cutest couple costume that I have been able to think of. Hao as the little prince and you as the rose. First off, this can be done no matter the gender and second, it's just so beautiful. If you've read The Little Prince then you'll get it but regardless if anyone knows what you two are dressed up as this would make for the ultimate couple costume IMO. And on top of that, this is the one that I think Hao would be into the most.

Hao would love to dress up if you suggest it. Doesn't mind either way but just likes spending some time with you and doing stuff that you love. It's a unanimous decision; As you speak it, so it shall be. Honestly, he's one of the most romantic and sentimental members IMO and I don't see a world where Hao doesn't make an event out of Halloween if you celebrate it.

A/N: I hope this delivered ;-; I usually do Minghao in the eighth spot but his was just getting too long to justify putting it first, so I went with the typical birth order.

Please Reblog and Comment if you enjoyed ! (They act as power-ups for me)

Taglist (OPEN): @bemybabiibish @bath1lda @porridgesblog

[serena-darrin]

A bit more on Battle Scars (again, Spoilers under the cut)

We're still getting a lot of stuff via being told it rather then being shown it. The author relies a lot on the narrator to fill in bits and pieces, and it's a very. . . . awkward writing style that I'm really not fond of.

Ok. I knew the sex scene was coming. But, uh, still very very awkward. Not the actual scene, but just. . . . there was no real build up. We have Merrin acting like an idiot schoolgirl going 'hey look, that's hot', and then we have them having sex with a fade to black. That's it. (Not to mention, that they're in -Cal's- bunk! Even assuming this is Merrin either getting caught up in the moment and/or being an ass to her brother, uh, that's probably going to be a problem for the guy who's psychometric?) Just, ugh. No. I'd honestly be happier if this were explicitly a fling or a one-night stand, (which we've been previously told Merrin has done, and that makes perfect sense to me) I just can't buy what's going on here.

Tangent for a moment - I do like that Fret's description breaks expected gender norms for a female character in Star Wars, as she is described as being "shirtless", and, if I'm understanding the author's description, has no boobs! I am cool with this bending of expected gender/biology, and it makes even more sense, since Fret isn't human. I'm honestly surprised that someone on the editing/publishing side of things didn't complain about that, or that it wasn't forced to be be cut/re-edited. Very nice to see a subtle challenge to expected gender and biological expectations there.

Going back to psychometry: Cal getting an echo off Fret's armour. Ok, I actually get this - it's a decent way to vet her, and he does debate the ethics of it all. But a) I actually found the echo very hard to follow, awkwardly so. Was that author's intent, or just writing style? Unsure. b) Why the hell didn't he tell Cere? We've already seen the disasters that happen when these two keep secrets from each other? Which leads to. . . .

Why the hell isn't Cere telling Cal about the circlet? Even only as a mention? It wouldn't have to be their primary mission focus, but why, oh why, is she keeping secrets from him when this went Ever. So. Well, last time? This feels incredibly forced for the sake of plot and character conflict.

Cal's jealous of Fret and Merrin. Honestly, I can kind of see this. Merrin is, in many ways, his sibling and I can see how he just wouldn't be equipped to handle this situation, emotionally - this is the first time he's had to face someone competing, in some ways, for the attention of a member of his family. What's frustrating is that he should be more self-aware. He's a Jedi with the emotional training, truncated as it is, that goes with being a Jedi. The fact he doesn't even realize he's jealous is, honestly, rather annoying, and it feels like he's being oblivious just to force character conflict later.

Why are you having your crew call/briefing 5 minutes before you come out of hyperspace????

Honestly, while it's not terrible, it's gone from 'this is kinda fun, just turn your brain off,' to 'I'm not sure about this, it's got fun parts but uh, not sure.'