#how every second he is fighting some aspect of himself to see which prince comes out on top

[didsomeonesayventus]

thinking about how I saw someone say "I wish alcryst stayed badass like in his intro scene" and like.

idk how to tell u that i thought the appeal was this lil fella at odds with himself on every level. He is FIGHTING himself at every level at two extremes, almost literally tearing himself apart from it, self destructive as he tries to build something "worthy" of himself. He's capable of such devastating brutality in battle (high Dex trend making for good crit chances and the only unit in the game who can learn Luna) and unbelievable compassion in the same small vessel (a keen eye for details, his talent being finding the best in others) with a judgment hot as a glowing white knife and capable of forgiving as easily as it would bend should new information present itself.

He hates himself he loves his world he is idealistic and in awe of everything around him but also able to see the bitterness of reality not always being so kind. He feels he's worthless and yet plunges into any course with everything he has and only the slightest hesitation and a bold- perhaps at times concerning -recklessness and courage to send himself, a ranged fighter, straight to the front lines.

He actually loves people, despite his every attempt to stay out of their way and not take up too much space of his own. He presents as timid and with a worthless confidence and yet when you get down to it or threaten his loved ones his spine is forged from steel and will not yield until the threat has passed. He is passionate and emotional, quiet and thoughtful. He aspires to be a strategist. He loves reading fairy tales.

Alcryst is a storm of a person, forever at war with who he wants to be. The whole appeal in is his wildly different sides u fool.

[surgepricing]

I think about Azula shooters often and their common refrain of "if Azula hadn't had a mental breakdown, she would've won" and I'm here to tell you that no, she wouldn't have.

There is no universe in which Azula was winning that fight with Zuko (or Katara, for that matter).

Azula spent so much of Book 2 being built up as this deadly terrifying force against whom the heroes are badly outmatched that it can be difficult to catch exactly how quickly Zuko is advancing.

Back up a bit to Book One. For the fearsome exiled crown prince of the Fire Nation, Zuko's not that impressive a firebender. He's not bad by any stretch, and he's able to lay the untrained Sokka and Katara flat pretty easily. Then he gets in the ring with Aang, who is an airbending master, and the difference between a regular bender and a master becomes apparent when Aang literally puts his ass to bed:

People have attributed this to the fact that no one's fought an airbender in 100 years, but I think it's also worth noting that Aang (a 12 year old from a pacifist nation) has probably never fought anyone before. Like, ever. And yet the second Aang thinks "okay, I'll attack back", the fight's over.

Zuko's got the same genetic predisposition for firebending talent that Azula does, yet it never seems to manifest because of his mental blocks. At the beginning of the series, he's already so beat down that all he really has is conviction, pride, and anger, so even with training from Iroh (the firebending master, thank you very much), he struggles. Yet throughout Book 2, when he has no time to train because he's on the run, he actually seems to advance faster. The fact that his bending is literally tied to his character arc (as his morals become tangled and he has to fight off aforementioned mental blocks) is pretty brilliant. Like, by the time of the Crossroads of Destiny, Zuko getting his ass handed to him by Aang is a pretty consistent feature of the show--he just can't match wits with him.

Hell, at the beginning of the series, he and Iroh (again: the actual firebending master) launch a combined power surface-to-air attack...which Aang casually swats away into a nearby ice wall. Come the Crossroads of Destiny, however, and Zuko by himself launches this bigass fireball that blows through Aang's defenses.

Zuko advances so quickly that it's scary. That prodigious talent is in him even if it doesn't come through as cleanly as with Azula. Who, by the way, was busy about to get flattened by Katara some few dozen feet away, until Zuko took over and then effectively stalemated her himself.

All of this in retrospect makes it abundantly clear why Zuko's firebending seemed to skyrocket so much when he learned true firebending from the Sun Warriors: it was really the only thing left. He's hard a hard road learning how to fight waterbenders, earthbenders, and airbenders, and even if unconsciously, he's applying the philosophy Iroh taught him about augmenting his bending style with aspects of other styles (see also, the waterbending-like fire whips he uses in the above gif). Once he actually understands fire and how it works, he's got it mastered. Hence why any gap between him and Azula effectively disappears as soon as their next fight--before her friends have betrayed her and her stability goes out the window. There's no real sense of urgency to their fight at the Boiling Rock prison. True, Sokka's presence with the sword helps, but Zuko doesn't look remotely worried and he counters Azula's every attack perfectly.

All her life, Azula only ever learned fire. She was taught by the best people the fire nation can employ, so she knows all the cool tricks, but she's still poisoned by the corrupted firebending practiced in the modern ATLA timeline. Unlike Zuko, who managed to get the basics if nothing else from Iroh (fire comes from the breath, and can be used to survive as much as to kill), Azula has always used fire as a weapon and a means to hurt others. She has no true knowledge of the craft, meaning she's got the same weaknesses as Zhao, she's just better disciplined to the point she can make up for it.

Zuko's victory was a given considering Azula's complete loss of control by the time of Sozin's comet, but even had she been in a perfect mental state, she'd have lost, because in many ways Zuko is simply the better firebender.

And that's the truth of it.

[stay-midnight]

Royals. I

Hyunjin x Male Reader

(Late Hyunjin Day Special)

a/n: Look at me and my late ass post again 💀, Anyways, this would be split up into two or tbree parts cause it’s gonna be a bit long than my other fics. So enjoy this for now 🤧 Smut would be on the second part which would be posted in a week or two (No promises though cuz 🤡)

Things to note: Royal AU!, Insult Fight, Implied Changsung (BinxSung), All of skz is here/mentioned, Implied Hookups, TXT is mentioned, Y/N’s a bit of a dick, Hyunjin is barely mentioned here yet, Minho is also a bit of dick, flirty Minho, Minho and Y/N tension, maybe some Seungmin x Y/N here and there too-. Prince! Felix, Jeongin, Changbin, Jisung, Hyunjin, Seungmin, Y/N and Knights! Minho and Chan. Y/N’s last name here is "Hyangsu"

W.C - 2.9K

A prince of the Hwang Kingdom is having their 21st birthday and you were invited, you were a bit salty about this since you really just wanted to relax after these past weeks of taking different lessons from your oh-so-called studious teacher.

As a prince of Hyangsu Kingdom, you were called to attend the Hwang Prince’s birthday ball, and attending this party was of your at most displeasure since you just wanted to have a relaxing break from your studies.

It was a 21st birthday after all, the age where you’re supposed to find a possible suitor and you just didn’t want to see girls fawning over someone.

You sighed in annoyance as your butler comes rushing with different clothes from your wardrobe, ranging from the royal-tailored attire, elegant clothing to a more casual one.

“Just pick me something that looks presentable as Prince, please.” you mumble to him as you glared him down causing him to tremble at your passive-aggressive tone.

You didn’t even know why they’re so serious about this, you’ve went to many royal banquet and events before, and none of them have ever got your parents or workers so.... worked up.

Is it because the Hwang Kingdom was one of the most powerful in the continent? You wanted to scoff at that thought but you may not be wrong.

In the end of playing a game of picking clothes with your butler, he picked a white suit with gold lines tattered over it, it had a gold plating at the shoulder, a red silk belt matching with the red silk long half-blouse, and white pants accompanied by white boots with a red sole.

After getting dressed you walked down to the lounge, waiting for the caravan to arrive.

You were a bit rude and snappy to people, you hated if they interrupted you one bit, not to mention you were sarcastic and people find it hard to win arguments about you. The only things people really liked about you are your looks and brains, you actually had a brain, unlike those snobby rich prince and princesses — who thinks they own the whole world, and the only aspect that are important to them are looks and money.

You sigh as you wait for the royal caravan to arrive.

. . . .

After minutes and minutes of waiting, “Sire?! The caravan is here, the carriage you are going to stay in is ready outside the palace gates.” your butler said fast, fixing his tie and cleaning his monocle afterwards.

You nodded and stood up to walk over to the gates, without command or words exchanged — the guards opened it as soon as they saw you walk down the path. Bowing respectfully at your presence which you answered with a simple “Thank you.”

You hum at the sight of the royal carriage — colored white with intricate designs and patterns made with real gold and of course, the family crest at the side of it.

A knight in a silver suddenly came out of the royal carriage, removing his helmet and smiling as he waved at you.

You let out a small smile back to him, Ah, the one and only Lee Minho, “Minho.” you spoke, reaching out to shake his hand, to which he gladly obliged.

“Y/N. Always a pleasure to see the prince. Well, if you were a bit more excited about this.” He teased, letting out a few snorts. Petting your head while constantly laughing amusedly.

“I’ll stick a fork in your eye one of these days, you stupid knight.” You gave him a death glare as a warning.

“Ah, Prince, you’re so kind~” he grinned, winking at you too, you rolled your eyes at his behaviour. He was always like this, flirty and sometimes egotistic. You didn’t mind it though since he is an amazing duelist and mentor. He isn’t a King’s guard for no reason.

But one day, his cocky attitude is gonna bite him in the ass.

You grumbled and moved forward to the royal carriage, “Lino, you should move, we can’t be late remember?” You tsked, giving Minho a smirk.

“Whatever.” He spoke up in an sassy tone, you snorted at him, to which he glared at you.

He entered inside the carriage, with you slowly following right after.

After entering inside, you sat down at one side while Minho sat near you. It was spacious inside as expected and a small window was also in place.

You had no interest in staying awake for 3 hours during the ride so you decided to take a nap.

~

“You could use my shoulder, you know?” He teased, patting his shoulder while smirking at you.

“Shut up.” you mumble as you shifted a bit so your head could rest more comfortably against the wall.

As much as you wanted to just sleep laying down at the long couch-like thingy where you’re sat at, you can’t because this stupid knight is watching you.

And the last thing you want is him, teasing you for being less than ‘formal’.

Slowly, the sounds around you seem to deafen itself out causing you to relax your shoulders and fall asleep regardless whether Minho is there watching your every move.

~

Opening your eyes as you felt someone poke your cheek, your eyes drifted slowly to the side. You were eye to eye with the knight, faces inches apart.

Your recently droopy eyes from sleeping — shot open in panic, “W-What are you doing!” you stuttered, leaning back from him which made him grin.

“We’re at the city, prince~” He pets your hair, running his hand through it softly.

You glowered and slapped his hand away, “Ugh, keep your hands to yourself, Lino.” you tried to glare the knight down.

“Ah, Feisty.” he smiled back at you to which you responded with a scowl making him laugh loudly.

“No need to be so aggressive~” Minho winked making you just look away and give up, you ignored him and looked out through the window, finding the surrounding endearing.

The loud chattering from the outside is muffled by the walls of the carriage, from at first glance, this was a very happy city.

It has a warm and vibrant tone to it.

. . .

The carriage comes to a sudden halt after riding in what seems to be a hill due to how it felt riding it earlier, the ground was sloped upwards.

The coachman driving the carriage suddenly spoke up, “We’re here, sire.” he spoke up, muffled by the wooden walls but you caught it.

With a sigh, you opened the door and slowly stepped down — your eyes widening at the sight of the towering castle.

It had a wonderful structure, the stone bricks perfectly fit into one another and of course the Hwang family crest adorned the flags that were raised.

Your kingdom’s castle was in no means small but it pales in comparison to that.

Looking around at the surroundings, you saw that a lot of royals were around, some you recognized and some that you had no idea where they came from.

You looked far and noticed the view of the capital at the city which you saw while taking a ride.

.

“...Prince Y/N.” After getting lost in a little bubble after staring at the refreshing view, Minho was nudging your shoulder.

“Hm? What is it?” you said, looking at him with raised eyebrows as you fixed the tie of your suit.

He rolled his eyes, “Did you even hear what I said?” he glared, tapping his foot on the ground multiple times.

“Would I be asking you if I did?” you shot back, clicking your tongue in annoyance as you waited for his answer.

He groaned at your attitude, “You have to sign up to enter the castle. Lose the attitude too, prince.” he said in a careless tone, looking at you with his icy glare.

“Who are you to talk like that to me, knight..?” you scowled at him as you stood your ground firmly.

What was happening now was in contrast to earlier, this was a more serious battle between you and Minho. These were times were usually one of the houseworkers back at your kingdom, steps in to stop both of you and succeeded most of the time.

To be honest though, this fight shouldn't escalate at all.

. . .

From the distance though, someone was watching both of you in amusement, “The party hasn’t even started and they’re bickering all ready.”

“Chan if you could stop them, please?” The man with long black hair commanded to the person next to him.

The knight fixed his posture and nodded, “Of course, my prince.”

“You can call me by my name, you know? We’ve been friends for a long time.” the long-haired man chuckled.

“Still need to use honorifics, sire.” the shorter smiled at the taller before leaving to stop the heated glare-down and exchange of insults at the entrance.

He took one last glance at the royal that was bickering with a knight, finding him amusing but at the same time, he found him interesting.

“Might need to keep an eye on that one.” he hummed to himself before going back inside the castle.

. . .

Minho just recently called you a brat and undeserving of being called a prince of your kingdom, he even mentioned your brother, the crown prince — next in line to the throne — he says of how your brother is just better than you in every way. This sends a devastating pang to your heart as this was not only hurtful to your pride but in a way, he also disregards all your hard work.

“Fuck you. You have no rights to tell me this. You are not my brother nor my parents. You are merely a fucking knight!” you said, shouting the last part.

Your own eyes are tinted with anger, wanting to choke the life out of your escorting knight.

“What, isn’t what all I said was t—”

An applaud was heard from the near distance, cutting Lino off and causing your head to turn to the source of sound.

The man with the curly locks and a pretty face bowed to your direction, “The opening ceremony of the party is starting soon, Prince Hyangsu Y/N. I suggest you sign the guest book and head on inside.” he smiles at you, dimples shown causing you go soften your look.

“While you,” he said sighing after, pointing to Minho with a finger.

“...Fellow knight, let’s chit chat for a bit.” he coughed and grabbed Minho’s hand — dragging him away despites the struggling knight's protest.

You looked around and noticed some of the royals still outside, staring at you with a hint of disappointment probably because of your fight with Minho.

You grumbled, annoyed and angry at the disrespectful knight — you'll most likely have to talk with Minho after this god-forsaken party.

. . .

A yawn almost slipped out of your mouth as the host of the party or ball, at this point you question which is it. The speech lacked any entertainment of the sorts causing you to just listen with half-lidded eyes.

Then came the introduction of the Prince that is having their born day.

A tall man suddenly came out of the curtains, aura filled with confidence and pride, gleaming and filling the room. You inspected his face and not gonna lie, he was indeed pretty, prettier than most princes you have seen — Long black locks neatly tied up in a ponytail, alluring eyes, thick and kissable li— You snapped out of your little bubble after noticing that you were checking the Hwang, this is not good.

You turned away from the center of attention and looked for your small group of friends but felt as if someone was boring holes into your skull.

Turning back, only to see no one staring at you but instead just the continuous blah blah blah’s by the Hwang Prince.

Sighing, you continue to scout the palace room for any signs of a certain fox-eyed brat, someone who dressed too dark and a ray of sunshine.

You clicked your tongue in annoyance when you still haven’t spotted the trio.

. . .

The Prince finally stopped talking and just announced that the dance will start in about an hour, giving his guests — free time to converse with one another.

After going through a sea of screaming princesses that want to marry him, you sighed in relief and just wished to leave this place. That is, until you finally caught a glimpse of a familiar royal. Finally.

.

You poked the shoulder of the foxy prince which startled him, almost causing him to spill his red drink over his royal wear. “God, Y/N, couldn’t you just approach me like a normal person.” he tutted.

Then returned his dimpled smile, he hugged you with one hand unable to engulf with his arms due to the drink he was holding.

“I thought you didn’t go to this clownfest.” you sighed, your words having a sarcastic tone.

“Me? Yang Jeongin wouldn’t miss a ball, especially one that is hosted by one of the richest kingdoms.” he laughed, taking a sip of his drink.

“Is that wine or juice? Also, why are you talking in third person?” you stared at him with confusion.

“This is red water.” he sassed mockingly causing you to roll your eyes and flick his forehead a bit too hard with your index finger.

“Ow!” Jeongin squinted his eyes at you.

He pulls on your ear at payback which you took easily before yawning and looking at the clock impatiently. You wanted to return home and sleep, and also give Minho a lecture.

“Where’s Bin and Lix?” you piped up before taking a seat at the small seat near a pillar, curiously scouting the again for signs of them.

He sighed and sat down right next to you, “Felix-hyung is hunting for more exotic food, since he liked the Shark meat a bit too much and well...” he trailed off, taking a sip of his drink and clearing his throat.

“Bin-hyung is getting flirted slash hitted on again by Prince Jisung of the Han Kingdom. I thought the he already gave up but nope. He still pursuing the Bin booty.” Jeongin chuckled, calling over a roaming waiter for a refill to which the worker happily obliged

You laughed at that since Han has been shooting hearts at Changbin for a long time and always had flirted with him at different parties. Changbin had always rejected his advances though.

“Also they sent a new representative from the Kim kingdom. I’ve never seen him before. Looks cute though, might be your type.” Jeongin said, nudging your shoulders and pointing at a specific direction. Your eyes raked over the prince’s form, charming and handsome but at the same time cute — He was leaning back at the wall, also drinking something.

You grumbled though, this is once again Jeongin trying to hook you up with someone again. It didn’t end well last time — The last prince, Jeongin hooked you up was Prince Yeonjun — All he wanted was sex though, causing you to immediately cut off ties with said prince, leaving a bit heartbroken at that since he only said that he wanted sex after you already spent the night together.

“Not this again, Innie.” you tsked, crossing your arms around your chest.

“Come onnn~.. I thought Yeonjun liked you a lot, he stared at you a lot during Taehyun’s party” Jeongin mumbles since he knows, that you don't like fooling around with people who didn’t even have a single interest on being on an actual relationship.

He felt bad matching you up with him, since he thought that was time you actually would get out of the singles’ list.

He nudged you and tilted his head to the Kim prince’s direction, “He’s walking over here.”

Your head immediately snapped to him, “Did he notice me staring at him earlier?!” you whispered nervously.

He raised his shoulders as he doesn’t know but you could already hear his evil mind spouting not-so-good ideas when he let out a grim grin.

“Well.....~ Y/N, I have to go find Felix, I kinda wanna try the shark meat, Ok byeeeee~” he said as if he was in a rush but this was just a part of his scheme.

“Jeongin, wait, don’t lea—” You couldn’t even finish your sentence before he was out of sight, the man was already extremely near you, his eyes never leaving your own.

You gulp, not knowing what to do in this situation.

In a mere second, you were face to face with the unfamiliar prince. He looked down at you with a emotionless face before sitting down next to you.

“My name is Kim Seungmin, yours?” He spoke with a honey-laced voice crossing his legs as he looked at you with curious eyes.

A smirk was starting to form at the corner of his lips before you opened your mouth to speak.

But nothing came out

He was attractive but he had soft features and an aura that resonates well with his features. He had this cute puppy-look to him but by that smirk he isn’t all that rainbows and sunshines.

Now, this is totally not good.

Little did Y/N know someone was watching this interaction in the distance, a prince than seems to be allured to you ever since he saw you within the crowd. He doesn't seem happy though~

~ tbc

[unbury-the-gays]

Hi hello I come to you with....a shortened list for the ask meme but not really since all of these are meant to be about Kiyan and Adrien (so double of course :3)

So I noted down numbers 16 (kinda want to go strongest to second strongest memory since we already know about witcher trials and a bit about Adriens family...stuff-unless you wanna go more into that then please do feel free to go off!!), 17 (I know Kiyan draws but how is it in general? Does he only draw from reference? Can he just draw out whatever he wants to without having to see it irl? Etc in that specific meaning but I am also curious about that in general for both of them since that isn't something I really considered aside from maybe tactics during a fight?), 54 (both may be smart but also emotional so I am curious if one aspect is more at the forefront when making decisions aside from specific situations or if it's rather even and/or it's more a thing of 'whatever fits the moment') and 63 (I may have my own thoughts that came up reading that question when thinking about them considering all we have from your fic+Adriens letters in game but I am curious what you think)

...I'd also just like to throw the first couple questions to basically every character as in I am wondering if you have any details aside from a couple of physical traits you imagine for the rest of the characters or is it more a 'Here are the 3 important things about how they look and the rest can be filled in freely' (of course also feel free to add in any details about Kiyan and/or Adrien that we may not have seen via fic of art yet if there are any coming to mind~)

(also rip to the last two favourites questions bc A does ice cream even exist in this world and B do dinosaurs??? how could you even decide on that if the characers live in a world without them? Who knows-not me; this is not relevant to the ask meme at all really but I needed to let someone know what my brain decided to focus on for too long before deciding what to ask other than „I'll take everything for Kiyan and Adrien (as per usual) please~“

this also got way longer than intended anyway....oops?

Thanks for the wonderful ask, we had great fun brainstorming from these questions! Getting way longer than intended is apparently the running theme because when we typed up the notes from our brainstorming we ended up with six pages of thoughts. So, um, enjoy? Also Advena made art for the dinosaurs and ice cream! All of that under a readmore because like I said, six pages.

16. What is your OC’s strongest childhood memory? Why and how as that impacted them?

So it probably tells you something that our first thought about this was tragic. We tried to come up with some happy ones too though! 

Adrien:

Adrien’s strongest childhood memory is his mother’s death when he was six. While his mother was alive, she didn't allow the senior prince to be too harsh on Adrien, and probably Adrien's father himself was generally a gentler person thanks to her. After her death, everything got worse.

His strongest not-tragic childhood memory is also of his mother. His mother played an Ofieri instrument (we’re picturing a veena) and she would sing him Ofieri folk songs about their gods and heroes. He’s taken out and polished and retold to himself the memories of singing with her over and over until he's not entirely sure if he actually remembers them or just the story he tells himself. He has a collection of Ofieri instruments, the only one of which he ever actually plays is his mother’s veena. He still remembers one of the songs she sang with him, even though he had to look up the words as an adult to be able to sing the whole thing. 

Adrien’s relationship with his mother, and later with Gisbert’s mother, who taught him to fight with the saber and told him stories of his mother and her homeland, is foundational to the concept of himself and his culture that he’s constructed.

For reference, the folk song probably sounds something like this: https://youtu.be/deyk5b7ggcQ

And his mom would sing to him in the traditional style, like this, though Adrien never learned the technique: https://youtu.be/s5a3pthL_tU 

Kiyan:

So the combination of childhood memories and witcher training is… not great. Every formative childhood experience we thought of was basically a variation on “we shook a witcher and intergenerational trauma fell out.” We brainstormed a tragic scenario, which Gav then got inspired to write so you can read it here: Still Here

His memories of all the dead trainees are part of why he is very soft toward children. Also, he has a major case of survivor’s guilt. He asks himself why he is the one who survived when so many good trainees didn’t, and that is the reason why Kiyan doesn’t want to die. He, unlike his brothers, was given a chance to live. So on the one hand he wants to prove that he deserves it, that as a survivor he has a duty to keep going; and on the other hand, he lives for those who died then. He believes he owes them.

17. What is your OC’s imagination like?

Kiyan: 

Kiyan draws a lot, from reference for practical witcher purposes and from memory to preserve his memories (e.g. he draws his witcher brothers to help him remember them). He doesn’t really do abstract drawing or create things from his imagination when drawing, he’s very focused on references and capturing reality accurately. The witcher trainers noticed his talent for drawing and encouraged it, but only for practical applications. From childhood, his dreams and fantasies were nipped in the bud.

Kiyan reads lots of practical witchering tomes, but he hasn’t sought out fiction books. He’s too pragmatic and doesn’t allow himself to indulge in “frivolous” things when he needs to devote his attention to skills that will help him stay alive as a witcher. 

With music, Kiyan has a good ear and a good sense of rhythm. He can recreate melodies by ear and has an excellent memory. In his travels searching for his heritage, he has encountered many songs, and he remembers them because he’s trained his memory so much. He hasn’t ever taken the time to fully learn an instrument, and he doesn’t have much time or use for singing, so he doesn’t share them often, but he knows them. Some anthropologist would be absolutely thrilled to find him and transcribe all the songs and stories he’s picked up some day.

Kiyan’s relationship to his imagination changes some after his trauma because he uses his imagination to help him cope during his torture and then to process and recover, both on his own and with Adrien. He gets more comfortable with creative expression that doesn’t have a concrete practical benefit, and his art starts to have more abstract and imaginary elements.

Adrien:

Adrien loves to lie. He has a vivid imagination and uses it to come up with complex and believable stories. Often he lies just because it’s fun. When he was a child, his mother and then his nanny told him Ofieri legends, and they encouraged his imagination. He spent a lot of time as a young kid playing at being an Ofieri prince instead of a Redanian one. Even once he outgrew the childhood games, a lot of the way he puts on the persona of being Ofieri is based in imagination. He’s never been to Ofier, only speaks bits of the language, and he builds on his treasured and worn memories of his mother’s stories to create his sense of meaning and culture. 

Adrien reads a lot of adventure novels. He has an idea of what Kiyan’s witchering adventures must be like that is more informed by tropes than reality, and Kiyan finds it exasperating (and adorable, but he doesn’t admit to that part) when he has to correct some outlandish imagination of Adrien’s. Adrien’s fantasies took one look at Kiyan and latched on hard. He’s the perfect adventure hero, of course Adrien fell head over heels.

Adrien really likes art and music, something he got from both his parents. He loves that Kiyan is artistically talented. When Kiyan lets him, he loves to watch him draw, and when he eventually finds out that Kiyan can sing, he badgers him into doing it all the time. 

Adrien loves beautiful things, but he cannot create. He can’t draw well, and he isn’t musically gifted. He struggles with his mom’s veena, not helped by not having any proper lessons, and he desperately wants to be able to play like she did. His imagination allows him to appreciate beautiful things and feel their beauty deeply, but he lacks the talent to express it and create his own art. At least, he hasn't figured out how to do it yet, but writing a novel might work for him.

Bonus (for both of them):

One way that they end up using imagination in bed is roleplay. Adrien loves it, of course, is into it from the start and gets very into the role. Kiyan is skeptical, thinking he’s too practical for games like that, but after Ireneus, he finds it helpful to distance himself from reality. He has to reinvent himself in a lot of ways, and roleplay helps him find new paths to satisfaction after trauma cut off many of the things he once enjoyed.

TL;DR: Kiyan turns his imagination into practical and analytical use, suppressing the more creative part, though that changes a bit after his trauma. Adrien can be very creative and devoted to his fantasy, but he uses it mainly to lie and manipulate people. He loves to experience art and beauty, and Kiyan’s creativity is one of the things that draws Adrien to him.

54: Does your OC think with his/her head or heart?

At first it may seem that Kiyan thinks with his head and Adrien with his heart, and in most cases that's true, but!

Kiyan:

Kiyan is, firstly, a witcher from the cat school and, secondly, later, a person who has survived kidnapping, torture and demon possession. That's enough to break the toughest, so Kiyan has a lot of triggers. That makes thinking with his head not as easy as he would have liked.

His analytical thinking, planning, and commitment to control and order come from the way he was raised. Guxart, not wanting to have another crazy ward, placed great emphasis on following head, not heart. Kiyan also knew that the overabundance of emotions was what resulted in the death of many of his brothers, so he was motivated to stick to the imposed rules of control and logical, cold thinking.

How did he go about it in practice? Well if Kiyan only thought with his head he'd have left Adrien by now. 

Kiyan definitely gets hit hard by the fact that “witchers don’t have emotions” is fundamentally a lie. Witchers learn to suppress their emotions, but no one teaches them how to manage them when they finally explode. Kiyan likes to pretend he’s cold and calculating, but of course, his heart is strong and stubborn and has a strong influence on his decisions. He rationalizes and makes excuses to himself, but he does things by emotion all the time. Case in point, Adrien’s entire everything.

Like most witchers, Kiyan struggles to identify and process his emotions. Cat witchers are notorious for their volatile anger, and Kiyan struggles to act rationally and not vent his rage when he’s angry. When he’s sad or in pain or struggling with other emotions, he defaults to anger as the safest form of expression. When he’s afraid, he tries to rationalize his fear and create options that give him control. If he can’t, he suppresses it. Witchers aren’t allowed to be truly afraid. Suppressed emotions tend to come out in violently angry outbursts. 

When it comes to positive feelings, Kiyan tries not to show them, because he thinks of it as showing weakness. If you care about something, something that makes you happy and feel good, it can be taken away from you. It’s a vulnerability, and vulnerabilities get you killed. He tries to reduce all these feelings into something logical that he can analyze and act on rationally, and then his whole system has a big error, because you just can't do it that way. Especially when as a witcher, he has never been taught what these emotions actually are.

This is why Kiyan is perpetually "annoyed" at Adrien. That's a safe, easily processed emotion. Surely, all of this feeling is annoyance. He’s annoyed at Adrien because that’s the easiest outlet for all the confusing feelings Adrien makes him feel, and then he’s annoyed at himself for being so illogically caught up in all these emotions.

In order to be able to think effectively with your head, you must have things sorted with your heart. Kiyan doesn't have it sorted, so he aspires to think with his head, but ultimately his confused heart makes the decisions.

Adrien:

Adrien obviously thinks mostly with his heart. He succumbs very easily to impulses and desires without thinking about the consequences. He doesn't analyze what he's feeling, he just follows the first impulse, which often makes him make the wrong decisions. 

So when we were describing Adrien we realized we kind of gave him ADHD with the impulsivity, fixations (Kiyan), special interests (horses, Ofieri culture), and general intensity level. Add in the distorted emotional intelligence from difficult family relationships and the fact that as a nobleman he could indulge his whims and mood swings, and basically all of his coping mechanisms are negative. As we are fond of saying, Adrien needs to be hit with a “be a better person” mallet a lot. But there are reasons he’s like this. 

It’s not that Adrien can’t be logical. He’s a good businessman, and he’s good at planning and organizing things. He falls asleep in meetings, though. Not because he's trying to, but because his brain just shuts down. When he has a task that doesn’t involve him emotionally (or if it involves only positive emotions that make him feel good) and it is closed in a short time frame, Adrien can be really brilliant.

Adrien also likes to do things to spite others, even if it doesn't have any tangible benefits for him, or even can harm him. It doesn't count as long as it allows him to get under the skin of his enemies. It is because of his impulsiveness that Adrien may seem unwise, if not stupid, at times. 

Adrien has a high emotional intelligence and strong empathy, but he often uses it in cynical and cruel ways. Adrien knows when he is dealing with a false person who is trying to trick him, and he can likewise read good intentions or naivete. Unfortunately, he doesn't usually use this knowledge for good purposes. Adrien knows how to put pressure on people, knows how to provoke them, knows how to manipulate them. 

When it comes to purely strategic issues like combat, Adrien is able to use gained experience and predict the moves of the opponent, but unfortunately he is also prone to risk. When adrenaline begins to take control of him, Adrien has no hesitation to reach for the most risky solutions, just for the thrill. He’s an adrenaline junkie and it drives Kiyan crazy because he can’t protect him well if he’s going to take risks just for the sake of them.

Interestingly, his propensity to risk drops drastically when the lives of the people he cares about are at stake. This is an interesting contrast because with Kiyan it works completely the opposite - Kiyan usually sees red in such moments and will choose the most instinctive solution - like covering a loved one with his own body to protect them, while Adrien will engage maximum focus to get his loved ones out of a dangerous situation.

Bonus:

All this put together shows how Kiyan and Adrien complement each other and learn from each other. Thanks to Kiyan, Adrien learns patience, and Kiyan forces him to actually think before doing things. Adrien, in turn, helps Kiyan to open up, express his thoughts verbally, and talk about the emotions that torment him. Ultimately, we want to believe that it is possible for two broken people full of bad habits to teach each other how to become better.

63 How does your OC display love?

Adrien:

The whole fic is kind of a thesis on how fucked up Adrien's expression of love is, to be honest, but let’s break some of it down.

Adrien is generous. He likes to give, and he is ready to throw the whole world at the feet of his loved one. And you don’t even have to ask - he will do it on his own initiative. So gifts, presents and gifts again, and generally providing a loved one with all the comfort and safety.

Unfortunately, the gifts also come with possessiveness and a desire to own another person. Adrien can be intense and not take no as an answer. He’d never force anything physical, but attention and gifts, definitely. He's selfish, which is odd to say with all the gifts. But he's selfish as a self-defense mechanism. It's a trauma response, not innate. So the emotion is genuine, but the expression is a collection of red flags. Kiyan catches glimpses of genuine emotion and can't tear himself away, right up until Adrien goes all in on the possession and Kiyan finally hits NOPE (this is basically canon and I love that). He's so intense about everything. Everything is always at maximum for Adrien. The part he's missing is that he can't just make the person he's currently latched onto want him back.

In terms of non-romantic love, Adrien adopts. He sees outcasts and relates to them and gives them everything he can if they'll just stay and love him. He habitually adopts anyone who shows him loyalty and acceptance. You see his guard full of well paid former outlaws and you think he's buying loyalty, but it's more genuine than that. Once you care, you're family. He went very hard on the "my family was horrible so I will make my own." (Insert “he’s a little confused but he got the spirit” meme)

Kiyan:

Kiyan doesn't know how to express feelings, how to show someone that he loves them, because he doesn't fully understand these feelings. He doesn't know the right gestures and words. Also, expressing his feelings verbally is awkward and he feels that he is doing it wrong and that it is not good enough, so he tries to avoid doing it at all. He has to be backed into a corner to get a verbal expression of emotion out of him, and usually these are life and death situations.

He tries to approach love in a practical way like everything else. So he gives gifts too, but of a completely different kind. It’s not so much an expression of generosity or a romantic show of feelings, as providing a loved one with something that they need. Yes, this is a bit of a cat stereotype, dead things on the doorstep, but it’s not wise to make that joke with someone holding that many knives. It can also extend to generally doing things for the other person. No matter how angry or tired he is, he will not leave his loved one in need, and he will do absolutely anything to help and protect them. 

He's bad at expressing his emotions and would much prefer to demonstrate loyalty. Which would actually work great for Adrien, who desperately wants to be cared for, if Adrien could just trust him to do it on his own terms.

Kiyan expresses his feelings through touch without even realizing it. Kiyan likes to touch him not only for the sake of desire, but for intimacy. It's like "I don't know how to tell you this, I don't know how to show it, but I want to be close to you, I want to take care of you." And Kiyan instinctively expresses his love with the way he touches him. When they finally get their shit together they do so much cuddling. And Kiyan wants to run his hands through Adrien's hair so badly. (This comes out as annoyance at his hair for being so curly and soft and ugh because Kiyan is bad at emotions.)

Kiyan has this stupid reflex of shielding his loved ones with his body. Not because he wants to sacrifice himself but because he instinctively perceives Adrien as fragile (for witchers, any human is undoubtedly fragile) and he wants to protect him. If something happens to him, it will seriously threaten his life while Kiyan as a witcher has incomparably higher chances of survival. His wounds heal quickly, he's used to the pain, and he already has many scars, so another one won't make a difference.

Also if you hurt his loved ones, even minimally, he'll kill you. Brutally and painfully.

Bonus:

Do not damage one of the murder husbands; the other one will make you regret that decision extremely thoroughly. Adrien will destroy their life and do a Leverage gloat about it. Kiyan will kill or maim them messily and painfully.

Dinosaurs and ice cream

You're right that they don't work in canon, but they're fun to imagine anyway so have some art!

Dinosaurs: 

Adrien would choose the largest and strongest dinosaur, while Kiyan would probably like the ones that he could kill quickly and efficiently.

Ice cream:

Adrien's favorite ice cream is mint and Kiyan's is strawberry. And of course Adrien introduced Kiyan to ice cream. And Kiyan loves it. 

Oh, almost forgot, on the physical characteristics - we actually have slightly different ideas about how some of the characters look, ourselves, as we discovered when Advena drew Gisbert! So aside from "don't picture the POC as white," we prefer to leave a lot of detail to the reader's imagination.

Thanks so much for the ask, we had a great time playing with all these questions. Sorry for the absolutely ridiculous length of this, but I suppose you knew what you were getting into with us and these characters lol

[voidbeans]

Bestie I don't know if you still want asks but. Tell me about the fantasy novel? I am very intrigued

HELL YEAH HELL YEAH HELL YEAH

*rubs hands together gleefully*

ok so there is literally. so much going on in this. there are multiple different storylines and just. ok. (putting a read more here because this is going to get. long)

So: world stuff. There are four kingdoms. There's one in the center that is kind of the main ruling kingdom, the others surrounding it are all under it (they all have rulers of their own but those rulers answer to the ruler of the central kingdom) (i'll get to him in a second). Each surrounding kingdom is dedicated to either the past, present, or future. So like the kingdom of the past is full of historians and scholars, who believe that the past is what shapes everything, that the only way to move forward is to follow the the examples set by history. The kingdom of the present is full of those who are focused on the now, the mercenaries and merchants and soldiers who believe that the most important thing is living in the moment. And in the kingdom of the future, there are the inventors, the prophets, and the beastmasters.

The beastmasters. Are certainly something. They're a type of inventor, I guess you could say. They build... creatures, out of metal and wood and whatever materials they can find. Creatures that move, that serve, that occasionally even make noise. They say it isn't magic, but no one quite believes them. No one really trusts the beastmasters.

All of these kingdoms are kind of.. well, they're a bit hostile toward each other, due to their differences. They're a ticking time bomb about to go off. Most of the hostility is aimed at the kingdom of the future, however, as most believe that the work they do there goes against the gods and their path.

The gods!! There are three gods, or one god with three faces/aspects. It depends on who you ask. Those aspects are the Judge, Jury, and Executioner. There are seperate churches and priests for each aspect, and each order has a different purpose (priests of the executioner tend to oversee war and, well, executions, they have a reputation for being quite violent).

Oh!! Also!! There are lands bordering the kingdoms. There's the Icelands, which are. Well. Full of ice. Very dangerous. There's the Wastelands, which are basically a desert. And the Woodlands!! A huge forest. It's said that any way you go through any of them, you will come to the mountain, home of three ancient seers.

now!! the characters. there are a lot so bear with me here.

So. there's the royal family, the one that rules from the central kingdom. they are:

King Reyne!! Reyne is. So so dear to me. He's neurodivergent and has an anxiety disorder (projecting time babey) that often affects him worse than he lets on. He's super insecure about his ability to rule, and he's under a lot of stress right now due to the growing hostility between the kingdoms i mentioned earlier. But he's an incredible king and a really good guy, just in general.

Queen Lilah!! Reyne's wife. They were an arranged marriage, and while the two of them are not romantically involved, they love each other very much and Lilah is a strong support for Reyne. She's also a badass. Will beat you up if you insult anyone she cares about. Has a bit of a temper (understatement of the century)

Matti!!! Mathias. Prince Mathias. Reyne and Lilah's son, heir to the throne. He takes after his father a lot. He's very curious and has trouble letting things go. He becomes convinced that someone's trying to betray his parents and the kingdom, and that.. kind of consumes him. I'm so excited to write him he has a brilliant storyline.

Ok and then there's the other people involved with the above family!!

RHYS. RHYSANDER FLORENT BLACKWOOD MY ABSOLUTE BELOVED. The king's advisor (and boyfriend), a total sweetheart with something of an edge to him. He, Reyne, and Lilah have this little chosen family thing going on that's really sweet. They're all each other's support and strength.

Silverfish. Silver is... the queen's spy, gatherer of information, sometimes gives advice too. Lilah wants it to also do assassinations, but it refuses to kill (will give the order to kill, but will not do the killing itself). No one really knows where Silver came from, and most don't trust it, but Lilah does. It never lies.

Alright moving on to other storylines: so y'know how no one likes the kingdom of the future? yeah, that's currently much worse due to some strange and unexplained happenings throughout all four kingdoms. Everyone thinks that it's the kingdom of the future angering the gods. So Reyne sends out a team to investigate these happenings peacefully, made up of a beastmaster from the kingdom of the future (he's cool. has an eyepatch. acts kinda bossy and like xe's in charge. a bit of an asshole, but genuinely cares), a knight from the kingdom of the present (trans woman. can and will kill you if you talk shit about her. has a wife. she's literally the coolest), and a historian from the kingdom of the past (Loren!! Loren is babey. the youngest member of the team, hasn't been in a fight in their life. unlike most of their fellow historians, doesn't hate the kingdom of the future and actually uses some of their technology in their archives (trained clockwork ravens, babey!!)). These guys get into so much shit.

Meanwhile, in the mysterious prison pit of despair run by knife monks: it's a prison. it's a pit. run by spooky dudes in hoods who sometimes take the prisoners and train them in their ways. There's a princess there, imprisoned for the massacre of her family (which she insists she had no part in). She's stuck with an annoying cellmate, a thief who broke into the prison just to see if she could. They're trying to get out.

And finally. there is Faraday. Faraday... is a prophet. He travels around preaching that the gods are dead and that the people must learn to take their fates into their own hands. No one likes that. He's wanted in literally every town everywhere. He's determined to prove that he's right, and believes in himself fully. Everything he says could potentially be true or false. No one knows. Probably not even me. He's. I'm so excited to work with him he's so fun. Has a little genderfluid bard that follows him around, hoping for a good story out of it (Ridley my belidly).

Those are.. the basics. But there is a lot. But I love it so much and I'm so excited about it and aaa thank you EVER so much for letting me ramble about this it means the world to me (and so do you) <333

[themoonlily]

Hi! I found your stories on a ficrec list for Eomer/Lothiriel and WOW!!! MUCH LOVE!!!!! I can't wait to read more wonderful stories from you! Can I ask what got you into this pairing, and what draws you to them? Also: any headcannons about them? (Physical/personality/hobbies/etc.)

Hi there! I am so glad to hear you like my stories. :)

I would say that I got to Éothiriel thanks to Éomer. I can't say I fell in love with him straightaway - I was your typical Aragorn fangirl back in the day (mind you, he’s still one of my favourite characters in the legendarium). I had always enjoyed the bits with Rohan in particular, and the more I watched the films, the more I liked Éomer, and once I had read the books a couple of times, I realised there was so much more to this guy. I loved his integrity, his unashamed passion, his loyalty and devotion to his family and friends, and how he strives to do better and learn. 

His arc in the books is such a fascinating one. He starts out as a scion of one of the leading families of Rohan (and is a son of a princess, no less), but is orphaned along with his sister at an early age, and then raised by the King himself. What kind of a trauma did that loss leave him with, and how did it affect his relationship with his sister? Were his teenage years very difficult thanks to this? At the time of the events of LOTR, he’s a fairly young man - among the youngest of the entire cast - and yet he has this hugely important duty as the Third Marshal of the Mark. He’s passionate but also ready to put himself and his own needs aside in order to do what’s right. The whole House of Eorl dynamics are just so fascinating, even though a lot of it happens outside the actual narrative of LOTR. What are his relationships with his uncle, his cousin, and his sister? How does this partnership with Théodred grow (to the point of Saruman seeing these two as the chief obstacle of the easy conquest of Rohan)? What does it feel like to watch his beloved uncle fall under the influence of ill-intended counsels (not to mention the threat of Wormtongue against Éowyn)? Éomer is portrayed as a fairly temperamental guy, so I can only imagine the fury he must feel at the situation. 

But then Théodred dies, the noose tightens around everybody’s throats, and one may just imagine the desperation and dread he must feel at this point. He’s still figthing and trying to do the right thing, even if that may now mean treason. But he’s still friendly to Aragorn and co. when they meet, recognising them as an opportunity to help Rohan almost immediately. 

He’s so loyal to his family that even after he’s been disgraced and humiliated by Wormtongue by the proxy of Théoden, he still knows where the true malice is coming from, and is ready to fight again for his uncle the moment he’s released. And he slips straight back to being the King’s lieutenant without even blinking his eyes. 

There’s also how Éomer becomes king. I’m fascinated with what it would feel like to him. I mean, he’s been second in line to the throne his whole life, so he probably always realised there’s a chance he’ll be king one day. But the circumstances he comes to the throne - the near ruin of his country, the tragic and violent death of his cousin he might have been able to prevent if not for Wormtongue, the brief time he has with his restored uncle, and then the whole mess of the War of the Ring... all that must feel pretty surreal for him. And, of course, the Battle of Pelennor’s fields, and his scenes in it... wow. Him nearly losing his mind over thinking his sister (and whole family) is dead, charging like a madman over the field, composing some pretty amazing poetry in the spur of the moment, and then just laughing in sheer defiance against what seems like imminent death. What a dude. 

And then there are so many other interesting aspects: how he must have felt over those long years (was he unhappy? was he lonely?), what he expected his life to be versus what it turned out to be, and what it did to him to watch his family leave one by one. I could go on, but then we would be here whole day. 

So, enter Lothíriel. Of course I was eager to know what happens to Éomer after the war is over, and fortunately, Tolkien had an answer ready - although he could really have told us more about them! Not that in canon there is anything to imply it was a love marriage, but personally, I don’t think that a man with a disposition like Éomer would submit to a loveless or faithless marriage (or that he’d risk his relationship with Imrahil by being faithless). I just can’t see it happening. Also I just want him to be happy, and find someone who brightens up his days, someone who won’t leave him. It’s nice to imagine him having a new start with her.  

Sadly, of her personality I can’t say anything that would be indicated by canon, but if we imagine her being anything like her father, then she might be a proud, strong and brave woman. Well, she would probably have to be courageous to leave her homeland for marriage (another reason I think it was a love union, because I want her to be happy, too)! I like to imagine her finding some unexpected, unimagined freedom in Rohan, perhaps even fulfilment of ambition in her role as a queen. Also, maybe with her background and if she had access to some kind of education, she’d be uniquely qualified to helping Éomer to rule and counseling him. Perhaps she even feels some personal pride over the fact that together, they are starting a new dynasty (or a new line) to rule in Rohan. Also, having a fairly big family, I think she would be well equipped to show him the love he has missed most of his life.  

I recall at some point reading the appendix about the House of Eorl, and that Éomer married Imrahil’s daughter, Lothíriel, and thinking yes, this makes sense. It’s just the sense I gleaned from the interactions and circumstances of the story. Of course Éomer would have strong feelings for Imrahil, since he was the one who saw that Éowyn was still alive and hastened her delivery to safety. Being a man of strong emotions, I think Éomer would hold Imrahil and his entire family in high regard thanks to this. Maybe it’s even a ground from which some attachment did grow between him and Lothíriel. Also, Rohirrim are a culture based on horses, and apparently the Princes of Dol Amroth also maintain a cavalry (the Swan Knights who, with Imrahil, took part in the Battle of Pelennor fields). So I see there definitely being a lot of points of connection! 

Of course, it also fits the socio-political frame we are left with at the end of the story: the new unity among the Free Peoples, the task of rebuilding after the war, and this new blooming of the friendship between Rohan and Gondor. On a purely logical level, it is reasonable that he’d marry the daughter of a powerful house like Imrahil’s. But for my purely headcanonish “aesthetic” (if that’s even the right word) reasons I do like the contrast these two make: their different cultures (and all that they entail from songs and poetry to foods and habits), their union as the union of earth and sea, his gold to her silver, the warrior and the lady... also this is purely headcanon/tropes but I definitely think of them as tol/smol and embodying the pair where A is the reason B began to smile again. (Tol/smol is at least half canon because Éomer is apparently as tall as Aragorn, like 6 feet 6 if I recall right. Since he’s also a professional warrior, he’s probably built like it too.)

So, yeah - I guess that’s already a lot of reasons for why I love this pair! There’s just so much potential there, so many avenues to pursue, and so much food for imagination. If you’re interested in more of my headcanons, you could try searching the tag “Éothiriel” in my blog - I’ve got plenty of posts about them! 

Thanks for the ask, and sorry for this answer being so long! I rather got carried away and Éomer deserves every bit of the love he gets, and so does Lothíriel. 

[rainbowsky]

The Wolf Reviewed

Spoiler-free section

My life is divided into two eras: ‘before seeing GG as Ji Chong’ and ‘after seeing GG as Ji Chong’. I will never be the same.

GG is magical in this series, and Ji Chong is among my absolute favorite characters of all time (I am actually in love with this character, which is heartbreaking given the fact that he’s fictional). The show also has many interesting characters and some exciting storylines, and in spite of some of its flaws this series is quite good. Highly recommended.

Of course there’s a lot more to it than that, but I can’t give a full review without spoilers. Here’s the rest for those who have already seen the series.

Spoilers under the cut

OK, where to start?

The Characters

There were so many great characters in this story and overall I found the performances of all of them well-acted and exciting to watch. I especially loved Ji Chong and Yao Ji. Both were complex, mysterious characters who stole the show every time they were onscreen.

Ji Chong was incredible. Everything about him was over-the-top amazing. I can imagine that GG must have identified a lot with Ji Chong because he has a similarly gallant, charismatic and kind personality. Seeing GG perform a character like this was mind-blowing because of the harmony between them in spite of their physical differences.

I could go on and on about how much I love Ji Chong as a character but if you’ve seen the series you already know how great he is. I truly fell in love with that man. He was everything I love in a person, and in such a beautiful package. I loved his nimble mischievousness, his rebelliousness, his fierce independence, his devotion to those he loves, and above all, his integrity.  With one exception that I’ll get into later, everything he did in that series was consistent with the image I had of him and it made my heart melt.

And it was pretty insane to see GG go from the thin, twinkish, bubbly and somewhat diminutive Wei Wuxian to the rugged, masculine, mature and level-headed Ji Chong. Not only because of the personality differences between the two characters, but also because of the physical differences. They look like two entirely different people. Ji Chong looks so tall and imposing in the series!

It’s impressive to see GG’s acting ability shine through in these roles. He has such a gift for acting, and for drawing viewers into the hearts of the characters he plays.

Yao Ji was another character that really impressed me. She had so much intensity and complexity, and her character arc was so strong. She was also just incredibly well styled and she looked breathtaking in every single frame she appeared in. The various headpieces and hairstyles she wore were stunning, and her sidekick Zi Shen was an aesthetic marvel.

I also really loved Ma Jing. Despite the fact that she was often used for comedic effect, her character was quite nuanced and multidimensional. I loved her loyalty and strength, and the depth of the love she had for Ma Zhai Xing really shone through in every scene she was in.

The entire Night Fury group was also amazing. I loved them as a team and as individuals, and the trajectories their characters went through were interesting and engaging. I was really invested in what became of them. When Wen Yan died I was gutted, and I was grateful that Hai Die and Mo Xiao had such a satisfying conclusion to their story.

I also adored Butler Shi. What a great character. He reminded me of one or two guys I know hehe. He had such a warm, endearing quality about him.

I’m realizing that I could sit here and name almost every character in this series. Despite some of the problems that I have with it, I’m reminded that the characters are exceptionally well-realized in this series.

The Story

Overall I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by the story. It was exciting and engaging, and there were some very interesting side conflicts and intrigues. There was an overall sense of adventure and plenty of action, some really emotional moments and even comic relief.

When you think about it, almost every character had something deeper going on outside of the main plot, and those side/back stories were really interesting and varied. There was complexity to the characters and their motives and experiences without it overcomplicating the plot.

The romances were not my cup of tea. I’ll get into that later on. But despite being the thread that ran through the entire story, they really didn’t feel central to it and it was easy to simply enjoy the show while putting aside the annoyances I had with the romances (I did this primarily by consciously choosing to take the story at face value, and choosing to believe that Ma Zhai Xing really was through with Prince Bo).

The show did a great job of getting me engaged and keeping me interested, giving me a story that was complex without being confusing, emotional without being too sappy (with some exceptions). The action, fight scenes, battles, etc. were exciting without feeling fake and cliche. There were some well-choreographed scenes.

I really can’t complain about much. I mean, there were times when I was watching this series that I thought I hated it, but in retrospect I can see that I really loved it in spite of some of the flaws, which I’ll discuss in a moment.

The Soundtrack

The soundtrack was quite good, even if it felt repetitive when I was bingeing the show. So many songs have stuck with me since I finished the series. I especially like Backflow by Jolin Tsai (second-last song on the playlist I linked). Of course I would have loved a song or two with GG, but the soundtrack we got was memorable.

What I hated

I really struggled with some aspects of this series.

I found Bao Na mostly unwatchable. She was incredibly annoying. As a character she had all the traits I dislike. Whiny, stalker, demanding, emotionally immature, jealous... I really couldn’t stand that character for a lot of the series.

It’s true that she started to redeem herself a bit through the course of the series but she never really evolved into someone I wanted to see more of. I definitely had some moments where I liked her and sympathized with her, but mostly she grated on my nerves.

I also hated Prince Bo through most of the series, and found it insulting that I was expected to view him as the protagonist and cheer for him to win the princess’s heart. I felt that the ‘love-hate’ thing between Prince Bo and Ma Zhai Xing was overplayed to a point where I lost all sympathy with Prince Bo and desperately wanted him to die a horrible death through much of the series.

His behavior didn’t reflect someone who was in love but wanted to protect her. Much of his behavior was excessive and gratuitous, much worse than was necessary to achieve its stated goal. He was incredibly emotionally and psychologically abusive toward Ma Zhai Xing to a degree that was often really hard to watch. Especially his near-rape of her.

This is a man that I didn’t want to see redeemed. This is a man I wanted to see burned alive. No one who truly loved Ma Zhai Xing would be even remotely capable of the actions Prince Bo took.

I will admit that he did begin to redeem himself in my eyes a bit later in the series, but not to where I could ever see him with Ma Zhai Xing. I don’t think that’s the sort of treatment one can ever redeem in a relationship. He might be able to redeem himself, but not the relationship. There are some lines, once crossed between people, that one can never come back from.

I actually felt that Yao Ji was a much better match for Prince Bo than the princess was. They were true equals with similarly difficult pasts, and similarly dark deeds to redeem themselves from. They were in so many ways perfect for each other.

Ji Chong and Ma Zhai Xing were a better match because they were more natural equals in terms of personality, values and life paths. There were tremendous parallels between the two of them. Although I ended up feeling she didn’t deserve him.

So for me, it was really difficult to get invested in the love stories I was presented with. Ultimately I found them all very unsatisfying. The people I wanted to see together were treated as unsuitable for each other in ways that were completely unbelievable, and the people I was expected to want to see together had unconvincing chemistry and incompatibilities that I couldn’t overlook.

Seeing Ma Zhai Xing die in the end was an OUTRAGE. Especially when I read about the director’s rationale for that decision.

“Her thought process on killing off “Zhai Xing” was that “King Bo” had done so much for her that it was time for her to do something for him. “Her character had matured the most in the series. Dying for Wolf Boy is the best ending for this identity of hers. To me, this perfect ending is even more in line with her character’s growth.””

I found that shocking. I couldn’t disagree more with this sentiment. She wasted so much of herself and her life for Prince Bo. He treated her like crap, and he didn’t ever truly do anything to redeem himself from that behavior. He should have been the one to die.

In my opinion, REAL character growth for Ma Zhai Xing would have been to see her overcome the fixation with Wolf Boy and with Prince Bo and just move on with her life.

I will say this, though: By the time Ma Zhai Xing died in the show, her character had already been so utterly and thoroughly decimated beyond all recognition via the Prince Bo housewife trajectory that there was no point in her surviving.

The absolute worst moment for me, though, was Ji Chong ending up with Bao Na. Talk about adding insult to injury. This is the one thing that Ji Chong did as a character that ran against my understanding of him as a character.

You could have done anything at all to Ji Chong, including killing him or turning him into a villain, and it would have been less of an insult to me than putting him with Bao Na.

I do try to interpret his invitation for them to travel together in a non-romantic way (despite the fact that in the world of the show there’s no way that a princess is going to go traveling with a prince without her reputation being ruined unless they are a couple). But when I tell myself that he took her traveling to get her away from court and give her some life experience - as friends only - then it becomes less of a bitter pill to swallow. I could see him doing that for her, and I could see them developing a strong friendship through their travels.

I just can’t see them as remotely romantically compatible. Not on any level.

I found it completely unconvincing that the most emotionally mature, honorable person in the entire series who had the healthiest boundaries and a lot of worldly experience and intelligence, would have any interest whatsoever in someone as emotionally immature, childish and inexperienced (and with no boundaries whatsoever) as Bao Na.

I would have preferred it if they’d framed that whole thing as him being a sort of big brother/mentor figure to her.

I felt like I saw chemistry and compatibility between Bao Na and Fourth Prince Chu You Ze, and I would have loved to see them end up together. They were much more at an equal footing. I was expecting that to be the outcome and it would have been a sweet one. They would have made a cute couple.

Final thoughts

The romances in this story seemed fixated on unhealthy, often misogynistic power imbalances and they were really, really hard to watch. Not just in terms of Prince Bo and Ma Zhai Xing but also the ugly Ji Chong and Princess Bao Na hookup they tried to get me to swallow at the end. I hate that kind of ���love’ story. I prefer seeing actual equals find each other in the great wide world.

However, pretty much everything else about the series was excellent. Ji Chong owns my heart and I only wish I could see more of him. GG completely blew me away and far exceeded all of my expectations.

Overall, I really love this series and will definitely be rewatching it.

[shinyatiny]

Flower Crown - yungi

Chapter five: Exchange glances

_____________________________

The entire village was busy as the townsfolk prepared for the festival. People had decorated the numerous streetlights with glorious-looking red lanterns, and as it was already noon, the lanterns illuminated a noble path all the way to the arena. It was like a personal red carpet for anyone who was headed there. The children were throwing flower petals on the streets to welcome the honorable guests to the village, making both Jongho and Mingi smile with adoration.

Some of the villagers greeted Mingi as the pair waltzed through the crowd of people. He tried giving them a polite nod back but failed miserably, awkwardly smiling as he gave up being polished. Jongho laughed at Mingi's stiffness, gaining a grumpy huff from him as a response. "The town's very lively today." He muttered, subconsciously gripping Mingi's hand tighter as he lead him through the thick crowds of people. It usually didn't take much time to reach the huge fighting arena but considering the streets were filled with people from all over the continent, it was harder to get there. "I've never seen so many people in one place. Where I come from, houses are scattered everywhere on the mountains."

Mingi stared at Jongho's (rather muscular) back for a hot second before answering. "Oh yeah! I forgot the whole berserker clan lives on the mountains." He pondered as the corners of his mouth quirked up a little. "Isn't it cold up there?" He cocked his head to the side, eyes shining in fascination towards the other's race.

The berserker hummed, thinking of a fitting answer, his other hand in his pocket. "No, not really. I guess we're built to withstand cold weather. But hot weather, that's something I dislike quite a bit." He admitted, a sweet smile on his lips. "It makes my skin dry."

"Oh? I've never read about that." Mingi mumbled, kicking a small rock on the ground. "As I said, I've never seen a berserker before so this is a big deal for me. I've only read about your kind from my books." He mentioned with an adorable pout as if he was embarrassed he didn't have much knowledge about Jongho's people.

"You've read about berserkers?" The other quirked up an eyebrow as if Mingi could see it. He slowed down because of their heated conversation, figuring out talking with Mingi wasn't bad. "I'm intrigued now. What have you learned?" He grinned, looking over his shoulder.

The elf let out a breathy chuckle, covering his mouth with the palm of his hand like a fine lady of sorts. "Well for starters, berserkers have horns on their head and it's their most distinctive feature after their huge size. Although it seems you aren't really the model berserker out there. Even my father didn't realize." He added. Jongho nodded nonchalantly, anticipation written on his features as if he was waiting for something to happen. And when Mingi finally asked the burning question, Jongho got silent immediately.

"Why don't you have horns, by the way?"

Like a deer caught in headlights, Jongho froze in his steps, staring right ahead at the huge shadow of an arena. Mingi's eyes widened as he realized he had asked a question he never should have. His eyes found the gravel path under his feet and he gently took his hand out of the tight grip Jongho had it in. "I — I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked! I-"

"It's fine, Mingi. Don't worry about it." Jongho assured, turning around to look at the taller elf behind him. He noticed how uncomfortable Mingi looked at the moment, guilt filling his stomach, making him feel worse. His eyes found the hand he had been holding onto just a minute ago. Mingi was keeping his fist close to his chest as if he was afraid to move. "I'd rather not talk about it here. It's a lengthy and saddening story and I believe it'd be better if I were to leave it for next time." He lowered his gaze towards the ground. "Sorry."

"It's fine! I'm okay with that..." Mingi bit his lower lip, guilt washing over him like an enormous wave, getting rid of the happy thoughts in his mind instantly. "I apologize for making you feel uneasy, Jongho. That was never my intention." He mumbled, taking in a sharp breath. "I can see this topic brings you bad memories, so let's change it, shall we?" He faked a smile, rubbing his markings through the silky shirt. "I believe I was talking about what I had learned about berserkers from my books."

"Y — yeah."

"I know berserkers are known for not expressing their emotions too often. They rely on their own strength more than their emotions and I guess that's understandable in some aspects." He explained as if Jongho wasn't a berserker himself, a small but excited smile on his features. "Although I must admit, you seem quite different from what the books have described." He muttered to himself quietly, wishing Jongho didn't hear him, but he did. "Anyway, those are some of the things I've read about your kind. I don't want to keep the other contestants waiting, so maybe we should resume our walk there."

"You aren't wrong about the whole 'known for not using their emotions' thing. I guess we use our brains less than others and use our heads instead." Jongho added, slowly turning around and taking his first step towards the arena, again. "It's harder for some. For example, I don't have a hard time with it most of the time, but there have been days when I have shut down entirely and haven't talked to anyone. No one really knows what causes this but I guess it's the class. Berserkers are like that, and no one really questions it."

Mingi lingered behind Jongho as he took some more steps, lips pursed into a thin line as he carefully listened to every single word. Some of the townspeople made way for them when they realized it was the prince and waved at him. Mingi looked down in embarrassment, almost halting in his steps when a hand grabbed his. He looked up to see Jongho holding his hand once again in a tight grip, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Can we hurry up?" Mingi said shyly, accepting the warm hand. "I dislike crowds."

"Of course," Jongho said, gently showing his gummy smile to the taller elf. He decided to ignore the bad memories and focus on Mingi's mood which had decreased tremendously when he had mentioned Jongho's missing horns. Of course, he felt bad for making Mingi feel that way, but how could he have known Mingi was going to ask something like that. "I'll take a detour so we can get there faster, okay?" He glanced at the other over his shoulder, his smile wavering as he saw Mingi's crestfallen expression.

"You don't need to do that. Just get me out of here, please." Mingi pleaded with a whimper, begged which made Jongho's heart drop instantly. Even if they've known each other for less than a day, the berserker didn't like seeing someone get uncomfortable because of him.

"I know, but I figured you'd want to see the other fighters. You'd see what you're going against in a few hours." Jongho explained while cocking his head to the side a little. "It would be the perfect opportunity to gain some information about the contestants in my opinion." He said nonchalantly, giving Mingi a stiff nod before grabbing his hand again. "Come on, we gotta hurry."

"Okay, fine."

°❀°

And there it was, the fighting arena, big and majestic in size. People were lined up by the huge metal gate, two guards with sharp, long spears standing on both sides, preventing the people from barging in. Mingi and Jongho wandered closer to the gates but kept their distance from the group of people since they weren't attending as spectators. The berserker glanced at Mingi and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. "It's grander than I remembered." He hummed, gazing up at the huge arena up ahead. "I wish there was something like this on the mountains. The only entertaining thing I can recollect regarding my childhood was a playground I visited as a kid." He laughed, a warm smile plastered on his lips.

Mingi cocked his head to the side, a frown engulfing his peaceful expression. Every time Jongho has talked about his time on the mountains, there's been this melancholic feeling in the air, like something was completely missing. Although the way the guard talked about it didn't seem too concerning, it rang some bells in Mingi's head. "Oh please, I'm sure there's something you cherish about that place." He smiled, trying not to show his inner thoughts to the other. He didn't want to worry Jongho, after all. "I mean, this village isn't interesting either. There's only this large arena in the heart of the town and that's about it. Some petite workshops here and there and the rest are residences."

As if something triggered a memory in Jongho's mind, he went quiet for a minute. Mingi noticed the way he almost withdrew from the conversation, looking for an answer on his expression. The berserker seemed to be in a completely different world for a second. After a couple more minutes Jongho had seemed to gather his thoughts and smiled which resembled a fake smile to Mingi. "I wish I could tell you." He finally stated, turning his gaze away from Mingi and glancing at their surroundings in thought. "Could you stay here while I question the guards?"

"O- of course," Mingi said, stuttering as he was still processing Jongho's answer in his mind. That just proved he had no idea what kind of person he was. He was completely in the dark about the other's past and if he was being completely honest, it made him slightly afraid. The fact that he had been so comfortable around Jongho frightened him quite a bit, it felt like they had known each other for a long time, like he had known Seonghwa. But in reality, they've known for less than a day. "I'll wait here until you return, go ahead, yeah." He smiled awkwardly, still held by his thoughts.

Mingi watched as Jongho made a beeline to the guards, his fluffy red hair bouncing as he walked. The people in the line yelled at him, furious that Jongho had casually walked past them and was now the first in line. Mingi could only watch and observe from the distance as the guard and Jongho conversed.

"Mingi!" An awfully familiar voice boomed from behind him. Seonghwa had come to see him.

Mingi beamed when he realized it had been his dear friend who had approached him. The pressure in his chest calmed down even if it was temporary, Seonghwa's presence affected him and he couldn't deny it. Even if it was for a few minutes, the world around him seemed to calm down and all he could focus on was his friend who was warmly smiling and patiently waiting for an answer. "You came!" Mingi grinned, waiting for Seonghwa to initiate something, a reaction, something. And when Seonghwa simply smiled brighter at his tall friend and he wrapped his arms around Mingi's torso, he grew worried. "Seonghwa?"

The older elf hummed next to Mingi's ear, causing goosebumps all over his skin. "I'm sorry you have to do this, Mingi." He mumbled, arms tightening around Mingi's waist. The said elf sighed and leaned into the hug, giving Seonghwa time to collect his thoughts in peace. The topic sure wasn't anything cheerful. "Your father's in the wrong here, for making you go through this. Fuck, I should've prevented this from occurring." He hissed, fists gripping onto Mingi's silky shirt.

"Hey, you're not the cause of this, Hwa," Mingi mumbled, running his hand up and down Seonghwa's back in a calming manner. The other only sighed in contentment as he relaxed more into the hug. They didn't care about the stares they got anymore, the situation was too intimate for anyone to stop it. "Please, don't condemn yourself because of my shitty life. It's not your fault, not in a million years."

A dry chuckle left Seonghwa's lips at Mingi's remark. He pulled away, hands still on Mingi's hips, just for good measure. "I know, dear. I know." He sighed, closing his eyes with a pout. "I just — I don't want you to get injured. I'm aware there are healers there when the competition starts but what if something happens and even they cannot heal you? What if you lose an arm o-or a leg or something? I could never forgive myself..."

And when Seonghwa was done with his rant, Mingi giggled, he fucking giggled. When Seonghwa was worrying his ass off, his friend brushed all of the thoughts away as if he was some kind of a god. "I'm not going to get hurt, Hwa-"

"Promise me. Promise me you won't get hurt, please." Seonghwa whimpered, looking straight into Mingi's brown eyes. "I'd rather not dwell in guilt... Mingi, I've known you for years and years, you getting hurt would — it would break me. I don't know if I'd survive with the guilt, knowing I could've prevented this all from happening. So please, tell me it's going to be alright and promise me you won't get hurt out there."

Seonghwa was desperate, that was clear. To be honest, Mingi was a little moved because Seonghwa clearly cared dearly for him and treasured him as a friend. It made him happy. But this was something he couldn't promise even if he wanted to, the opponent is always unpredictable whether he liked it or not. There's no way he could know their next move, he wasn't a mind-reader. "Seonghwa... you know I can't promise you that..." He murmured, looking down at the gravel path under his feet. "The opponent is unpredictable, I don't know what they're capable of doing. And you know I'm not an expert in combat, I suck, to be honest. I don't even know what I have to do out there! How the hell am I supposed to fight in front of everyone; in front of my father when I have no idea what I'm doing?"

"I'm sorry you have to go through this," Seonghwa pursed his lips together, taking Mingi's hand and pressing his lips on the soft skin. Mingi widened his eyes in surprise but didn't comment on it. Seonghwa must be distressed about the whole competition. "Just know I'll be watching you in the audience among the others. I'll stop the fight if I see you getting hurt, with force if I have to." He smiled sadly, letting go of Mingi's hand. A thousand words were said without speaking with that simple gesture and Mingi understood every single one. "Were you waiting for someone?" Seonghwa asked, letting the heavy topic finally go.

"I — yeah. I was waiting for my guard to come back." Mingi smiled awkwardly, glancing at Jongho who was still chatting with the other guard. "He went to talk with the other guards. I guess he had something to ask from them." He hummed, keeping his eyes fixed on Jongho's figure. "You know, he's an interesting guy, I must say."

Seonghwa tilted his head to the side, waiting for Mingi to continue. "How so?"

"He's not from our village; he's not an elf, Hwa," Mingi stated nonchalantly, a sigh leaving his lips. He didn't expect the awestruck expression in Seonghwa's features when he turned to look at him. "What? As if there aren't any other species walking around town right now. He's just someone I never thought could join my father's forces, that's all."

As if he had just heard a huge secret, the silver-haired widened his eyes in disbelief, eyeing Mingi as if he was asking if what he had said was true or not. "You're kidding." He murmured. "How the hell is he a guard if he's not an elf? You know very well your father doesn't allow anybody to join his ranks, don't you?"

"I'm aware of that, yeah." Mingi sighed. "But I know what he is; he's a berserker-"

"He's a what now?!" Seonghwa interrupted with a restrained yell, eyes wide as plates. A member of the berserker clan living among elves wasn't what he was expecting at all. It was unheard of. "Mingi, that's extremely dangerous, you know that right? And how do you even know he's one of them? He doesn't even have horns and he's shorter than you." He questioned, a confused expression on his features as he observed Mingi's look.

"He told me," Mingi answered quietly, glancing away from his friend. "And how do you even know of this stuff? Have you met him before?" He countered, a similar expression to Seonghwa's on his features now. "You seem to know a lot about berserkers, Hwa." Seonghwa was about to reply but Mingi beat him to it, ignoring the irritated look on his friend's face as he continued to speak louder. "In any case, I don't think Jongho's dangerous. He's proved himself to be calm and collected, so in my opinion, there's nothing to be worried about."

"Mingi, a berserker in an elf village is unheard of! It's a long way to this village from the mountains, you know that. He would've had to walk for months to reach this village. Do you think he'd be that desperate to join your father's forces? Because I don't, there's no way that's the only motivation behind his leave." Seonghwa said with his jaw clenched. "I don't think you understand how grave this situation is, Mingi."

"I-"

"What're you guys talking about?" A familiar voice called out. Mingi sighed and turned to look at Jongho who was running toward his with a wide grin, waving his hand like a child. "Mingi, I know where we have to go now! The guard said the waiting room is there, in that big building next to the arena." He stated, pointing at a semi-worn-out building in the distance. The building's grey, moss-covered walls created a haunting picture in Mingi's mind and he sure wished the building would look better on the inside. The furniture better be nice. "And who's this? Is he your friend?" Jongho cocked his head to the side, an innocent pout on his lips.

Seonghwa huffed and looked away from the red-haired, sticking close to the taller elf. "I'm Seonghwa, Park Seonghwa." He said sternly, gripping onto Mingi's left arm. "I own a local jewelry shop here." He added, ending the conversation right there. Jongho blinked in confusion, slowly nodding with pursed lips. It seems Jongho hadn't realized Seonghwa's annoyed mood yet, and that's what Mingi was fearing.

"Oh! I don't think we've met yet." Jongho smiled brightly, his gums showing. Seonghwa hummed, looking at the hand in front of him, contemplating whether to shake it or not, but he didn't necessarily fancy being impolite. "Uh, Choi Jongho. That's my name if you didn't know it already. I don't know if Mingi mentioned me when I was talking with the other guards." He explained, a blush dancing on his cheeks out of pure embarrassment.

"No, he mentioned you, just not your name," Seonghwa said calmly, nibbling with his dangling earring. The piece of jewelry was one of his own creations; a silver crow with a blue jewel as its eye. A few years back, Mingi had mentioned it looked pretty on him and since then he's been wearing it almost every day, hoping to get some kind of a reaction out of the younger elf. "I heard you're not from around here, Jongho," Seonghwa raised an eyebrow, eyeing the berserker up and down.

Jongho's lip twitched, a look of horror replacing his features for a split second before it was replaced with a worried look. "I-" He started, worriedly glancing at Mingi's direction as if asking for help. "Yeah you — you could say that." He stuttered, scratching his nape out of awkwardness. "Did — have you heard anything else about me?"

Seonghwa snickered, finally letting go of Mingi's arm, a serious expression replacing his previous one. "Just the fact that you aren't an elf." He said. Mingi opened his mouth to say something but decided against it, grabbing Seonghwa's hand, feeling the several rings around his fingers. Seonghwa glanced over his shoulder at Mingi, his full attention on him and him only. "Mingi?" He asked, voice turning soft as if a switch was flicked just now. "Is something wrong?"

"Please, don't force the topic on him..." Mingi mumbled, some extra incoherent words leaving his lips in a rush. Seonghwa nodded gently, shifting his glare to Jongho. "Hwa, the festival should be beginning shortly, I have to go."

"I understand," Seonghwa mumbled, wrapping his arms around Mingi's waist one more time to hug him. The hug was swift, but it warmed his heart and calmed him down. Mingi smiled at the older's touchiness, accepting every little hug and kiss that was presented to him. "Be careful, Gigi. I'll be watching you." Seonghwa said, a smile decorating his lips wonderfully.

" I will," Mingi giggled at the cute nickname, unwrapping his arms around Seonghwa's torso. He looked at Jongho who was awkwardly watching the two interact with pursed lips. "Come on Jongho, let's go. You said you know the way to the waiting room, didn't you?" Mingi chuckled.

"Of course," Jongho said hastily, sprinting to his side immediately. "This way."

"Alright," Mingi smiled. "Bye, Hwa. We'll be seeing each other after the festival."

"Yeah, see you."

°❀°

Jongho pushed the heavy door open, a creak following it. It lead them to a hallway that was lit by the same red lanterns which were hanging from the streetlights. It wasn't anything special, just an ordinary hallway, a long one. But compared to the moss-ridden walls, the inside was much nicer. "Well then, shall we go?" Jongho raised an eyebrow, nudging the other playfully on his shoulder. A small yelp left Mingi's lips at the nudge but he brushed the thought away with a roll of his eyes.

As Jongho closed the wooden door behind him, Mingi observed the hallway, seeing a few people talking up ahead. The closer they got to them, the more Mingi began to realize they weren't from his village, the more he began to realize they weren't elves, to begin with. He halted in his steps, frozen in place as he watched the group interact with each other. What gained his attention was the unusual color of their hair; bright, royal blue. He had never seen anyone with blue hair before, at least not in his village and it intrigued him. It also made him fearful.

"What's he staring at us?"

"I don't know, ignore him. He's a weirdo."

Mingi hadn't even noticed that he had been staring at the group. What made him realize was the sudden silence in the hallway and the countless whispers sent his way. With a blink, he looked away from the group and turned to Jongho who was watching with narrowed eyes, observing the unknown people. He glanced at Mingi who seemed to be unsure of the situation himself and pushed the said elf behind him. "Are you guys going to compete in the festival?" He called for them, gaining their attention. Mingi widened his eyes and was ready to silence him but Jongho kept going. "If not, I have to kindly ask you to leave, this place is for competitors only."

This was one of the moments Mingi would like to bury himself in a hole and disappear from sight. He didn't want to cause any problems and Jongho had seemed to notice his distress as well, placing a hand on his shoulder for reassurance. "Maybe it's not a good idea to pick a fight with those guys, Jongho..." Mingi whispered behind the berserker, gripping onto his shirt for comfort even though he was towering over him because of the height difference. "Jongho-"

"Who are you to tell us that? Are you a competitor yourself Mr. muscle man?" One of the men laughed slyly, leaning against the wooden wall. "You look lost yourselves. Do you need help finding your way out? Out of this village perhaps?" He said with a lazy smirk. This made Jongho's lip twitch in annoyance and he sure hoped it wasn't visible because he was boiling with anger inside.

"Oh, I'm not the one who's fighting, prince Mingi is," Jongho said with a smooth grin, pointing at Mingi who was standing behind him, nervously biting his lip, almost drawing blood from it. If he could've, he would've loved to show them their reaction when he had mentioned Mingi's title, but oh well. "It's his first time being here, so obviously, seeing new people makes him nervous."

The man who had laughed shut up quickly, pursing his lips together and spewing something that seemed to be countless curse words. "Sure." He rolled his eyes in irritation, glaring at Mingi before ignoring the pair completely. Jongho laughed silently, taking Mingi's hand and leading him to the right room on the left. The elf followed put behind him and looked around the building in awe.

When they reached the main building Mingi was breath-taken by the interior of the waiting room. For starters, it was gloriously decorated with wine-red wallpapers with golden flowers embedded into it. Two huge pillars that were at least 4 meters tall stood before him, looking grand as ever. The room was bustling with life, people everywhere. It didn't tone down his anxiety at all and even Jongho seemed to pick up on this, leading him towards a less-crowded corner. Although the festival was only beginning, everyone was already seated at the long tables, glasses full of what looked (and smelled) like their finest grape wine.

Their attires were something Mingi was blown by, majestic and noble-like. He felt rather small in everyone's presence but ignored the gut-twisting feeling in his stomach and focused on the scent of wine and food in the air. Some of the guests had noticed the elf prince and his guard, eyeing the pair from afar like they were something unknown to them. The hall got fairly quiet when they settled down on some benches next to the wall, everyone's attention thoroughly on Mingi and his companion.

The elf gulped down the lump in his throat, looking down at his shiny black shoes for comfort (of course this didn't really help). Cocking his head to the side, he whispered something to Jongho so quietly even the berserker didn't hear him. With a silent curse, he spoke a little louder. "Why's everyone staring at us?" He whisper-yelled, a bead of sweat forming on his neck. "This definitely isn't what I had expected. I hope it won't be like this when we get to the main arena."

"Ever considered they might be staring because of how you look, Mingi?" Jongho countered, whispering back. Mingi widened his eyes looking down at his outfit in confusion as if there was something wrong with his attire. "You look excellent, don't worry. I think everyone's staring at you because you look too fancy for this event. They're jealous." He grinned lazily.

"Me? Too fancy?" Mingi said, a crease forming between his brows. He switched his gaze from his pants to Jongho only to see him smiling widely at him, small crescents forming in his eyes. It almost, almost melted the iceberg of nervousness in his heart, but not entirely. Despite the warm aura Jongho radiated, Mingi couldn't help but feel a little on edge about the whole situation. He never wanted this in the first place as he was forced to compete by his father's orders. Seonghwa's words made him even more nervous. "They can stare all they want, I don't care. It's not like I look terrible." He grinned back, trying to contain the disappointment in his heart.

"Right, of course-"

"I will not let you fight with that outfit! You look hideous, disgusting!" A sudden, loud voice resounded in the hall. Everyone turned their heads towards the abrupt noise at the door, Mingi and Jongho included. "Your piercings are a disgrace here, I won't tolerate something this sickening here, get out of here before I'll throw you out myself!"

"Come on, this?" Another voice, a deeper one responded, a hint of playfulness in it. "You're saying this is hideous? Do you not have an eye for good clothing?"

"I'm saying this outfit of yours isn't pleasing to look at. As I said, it looks terrible on you." The previous man yelled impatiently. Mingi had spotted the yelling man at the doorway, shouting at someone tall, very tall. "Yunho, please go change your outfit into something more traditional, I beg of you." He pleaded, stiff shoulders slumping down in defeat when the other only shook his head. "You're going to compete in that?"

"Why of course I will. Why wouldn't I? I want to fight with style, Mr. Daesung. I'm sure you understand." The man named Yunho declared, quirking up an eyebrow as the corners of his lips lifted upwards. "Also, who are you to boss me around? I don't live in our village anymore so why would I need to follow those silly rules?" He said, leaning against the doorway. "I'm here to have a little fun since the chief sent me an invitation letter, that's all. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go sit somewhere more peaceful." He added with a wide, warm grin.

Everyone's eyes were glued on Yunho's figure as he stepped into the awkwardly silent hall, looking around for an empty seat someplace quiet. Mingi, too, was watching the unknown man, but something more interesting piqued interest in him; his outfit.

This man named Yunho was drop-dead gorgeous. Mingi could've sworn he saw something shimmering under the see-through shirt he was wearing. Yunho's outfit seemed to gain attention from the other guests as well considering what he was wearing was nothing like the traditional outfits everyone else had on. It was closer to Mingi's outfit which made him glad he wasn't the only one with taste. Jongho seemed to ignore the commotion as he was leaning against the wall with his eyes closed.

And when Yunho seated himself on a wooden chair situated on the opposite wall, his silky shirt shifted with his movements. Mingi's eyes went wide when he saw the other. Yunho's gorgeous markings reached from his back all the way to his toned stomach. The dark tattoos gracefully complimented the golden piercing on his belly which made Mingi's heart race for some reason or another.

Then it happened. A smirk, a simple smirk from him was able to set Mingi's cheeks aflame and he wasn't sure if it was a good thing or not. It probably wasn't since the stares he got from Yunho were more intense than the ones his father gave him this morning.

For the first time in a while, Mingi was completely flustered because of someone, and that someone was Yunho whom he didn't even know.

[spaceorphan18]

i really liked your s6 blaine meta! would you be willing to do something similar for season 5 episodes 14-20?

Hi Nonny! Sorry for the delay, this is kind of a huge undertaking.  I’m going to be honest, this will be more of an abridged answer.  I really recommend looking over to my Finding Kurt Hummel Meta, because a lot of Kurt and Blaine’s stories are intertwined, and I do talk a lot about Blaine and his motivations there.  That said, let’s dig in! 

Pre-New York Arc

So, as Blaine tells us when before he’s going to graduate, his senior year has been really hard and really weird.  He broke up with his boyfriend, dealt with a school shooting, suffered the loss of a good friend, and then got engaged.  (Y’all should check out my Glee Timeline to see just how squished all of this stuff really was.) By the time his tenure as a high school student is over, he’s desperate to fast forward to being a full fledged adult -- living out his dreams in New York City.  The problem is trying to force your dreams come true doesn’t always work, especially when a) you’re still a kid trying to figure things out and b) you still have a lot of insecurities and mental health issues to deal with.  

So Blaine (and Kurt) still have a lot of growing up to do.  And a lot of the New York Arc is figuring out just that.  

Let’s talk about the proposal for a second, too.  Blaine jumping to marriage is, yes, a bit pre-mature.  He’s was so desperate to get his relationship back on track with Kurt, and so wanting to prove his commitment, he jumped about fifteen other steps and went straight to what he would be the ultimate band-aide -- marriage.  Well, just because you’re married (or engaged) doesn’t mean you don’t have a lot of issues in your relationship.  Blaine and Kurt were too young for their engagement -- and not necessarily because of their age, but because they really hadn’t dealt with a lot of things the move to New York, the cheating, and the first break up did to their relationship.  However, Blaine wants to ignore a lot of the red flags because he feels since he has Kurt back, and put a ring on that finger, he should be fine, right?  His insecurities about Kurt not loving him or wanting to leave him should be squashed because -- ring.  Right??  Oh, Blainey. 

New New York

So, what we don’t see is the six-to-nine months of Kurt and Blaine living together.  Which is a shame.  Because we don’t see how it started, and how they probably were so head over heels wanting to live together and do all the fun things Burt listed off in his conversation with Kurt before the proposal in Love Love Love that they did not have any kind of conversation about how living together would ultimately work.  So, it’s nine months later, and things aren’t so rosey.  

Blaine is trying very hard to make them the old married couple he wants them to be (which is no shade on Blaine!).  He’s singing old timey songs, and basically trying to show his love through acts of servitude, and kind of trying to ignore the nagging feeling that Kurt’s unhappy about it.  

Blaine is a giver by nature, and wants to make Kurt happy, and he thinks if he can be the perfect boyfriend (because he wasn’t before, made a mistake, didn’t take into account that Kurt really was part of that issue, and blames himself for the relationship woes) that his relationship with Kurt will be fine.  The problem is that Blaine is losing himself in the relationship -- trying to be the person he thinks Kurt wants him to be, and the person his own imagination thinks he should be, instead of the person he really is.  

The other thing is that Blaine is a bit clingy.  There’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend time with your significant other.  But Blaine wants to spend every waking moment with Kurt so they can share their magical journey together.  You see -- in high school, they were joined at the hip, and did do a lot of things together.  But they also had a lot of time apart.  They both had groups of friends to do things with, and different households to go home to.  But now, all aspects of their life are jammed into that little loft.  And for Blaine, it’s fine, (though it’s not - he has to learn how to be an individual person, too), but Kurt is struggling with it. 

Here’s the part where I do need to bring up Blaine and his homelife.  Blaine being who he is - is somewhat just his personality.  But part of it is also his homelife.  We can infer that unlike the Hummel household, Blaine’s family wasn’t exactly ones to unconditionally supportive in the same way.  He always had to compete for attention (and possibly love) with Cooper.  He has always felt that no matter how ‘good’ he is -- he’s a failure.  And he is, by far, his own worst critic.  These are things that Kurt cannot fix for him, and while Kurt can continue to love and support him, Blaine himself has to reach a belief that he is a worthy individual of love, support, and happiness.  

Also, because Blaine is trying so hard to make life perfect for Kurt, he’s not being able to make his own experience uniquely his own.  He tries to find a cute couch -- but it’s rejected (rightfully because bed bugs, but still).  He tries to make himself a space in the loft, but Kurt shuts that down.  Everything is about how Kurt thinks and feels, and because Blaine’s giving in on these things, he starts to go inward on himself, and thus they fight over dumb things.  (Kurt needs to learn how to share and compromise, Blaine needs to learn to stand up for himself and his own wants and needs.)  

As an aside, Blaine isn’t really jealous of Elliott -- that’s a bit of displaced anger.  But going to Elliott does help (wise sage that he is), and while that convo is a little weird, there is some good advice in Elliott saying you have to figure out who you are, and maybe not be so clingy.  Boundaries are good and don’t lose yourself in the relationship. 

So, about their decision to live apart -- my Kurt meta had a good paragraph: 

I’d also like to mention that Kurt isn’t really thrilled with Blaine’s idea.  He doesn’t want Blaine to leave, but he recognizes that something has to change.  Unfortunately, they’re still young and growing and don’t have the tools or experience to figure out how to fix what’s wrong.  So - in a way, I get this solution.  Blaine doesn’t know how to give Kurt emotional space - so let’s try physical instead.  

Blaine wants to fix the situation, so it’s no surprise that Blaine is the one to comp up with the solution.  It’s not great (honestly, they should have moved out and found their own place but alas tv show logic), but it’ll have to work for now.  Blaine is more interested in salvaging his relationship the only way he can try to.  Unfortunately there are some other, bigger issues going on, but for now, they’ve come up with something that might help.  

Bash

It’s a shame we don’t get more Blaine during this episode, because I think it’s really important.  There’s a story here about the frustrations a gay couple can have when one of them is going through a major trauma, and the other can only sit and wait to see how it turns out -- adding in outside factors such as, hospitals not allowing the partner to visit because they aren’t legally “family”.  

So, one of Blaine’s biggest fears is losing Kurt.  And this time he does to an external power.  Blaine, who likes to control things just about as much as Kurt, feels like he should be able to protect Kurt no matter what, and comes out of this episode feeling like it’s his duty to do that.  

You see, Blaine doesn’t think he’ll survive very well if anything ever happened to Kurt, and kind of ignoring the fact that Kurt kinda jumped into the fight himself, Blaine decides that he’ll do everything in his power to ‘save’ him.  Problem is, that’s not at all what Kurt wants or needs....  Which will be discussed more in the next episode. 

Meanwhile, Blaine manages to piss off Carmen Tibideaux with he and Rachel’s little duet idea.  Not liking anyone mad at him, he does go retake the final (or whatever it is), and pours his own fears and sadness into the song.  I do kind of wonder if Blaine’s involvement in this is a slight nod that Blaine won’t be finishing his college career at NYADA.  (Which is fine - the school is utter shit.) 

Tested

Okay, god.  Here’s the Kurt Meta because this is one really complicated episode that I won’t do justice in the little blurb I’m going to write here.  There’s A LOT going on, and it’s helpful in understanding the story as a whole, and I do write about both their sides in the Kurt Meta. 

So, here we are -- Blaine is trying to make Kurt’s New York life and experience perfect, and he kind of ignores his own.  But, he is indulging himself (as young people in new places often do) and not taking care of his physical health either.  He does gain some weight (or Glee tries to suggest that he does), and this latches on to his insecurities from before.  

A lot of this episode’s issues comes down to identity --- Blaine saw himself as the White Knight in Shiny Armor -- the one who protected Kurt from Karofsky, and made him smile.  The one who was the prince who got to give the other prince the Happily Ever After.  The problem, though, is all of this is magical fairy tale talk that doesn’t work in the real world.  

Kurt isn’t a delicate flower who needs rescuing.  He is very physically fit, and is seen as attractive by other people.  And Kurt is trying to find his own, individual identity that isn’t solely connected to Blaine.  All of this activates Blaine’s major insecurity about being rejected -- about not being loved enough.  He doesn’t understand that he doesn’t have to be the person who another person needs for them to love him.  He can just be the person who someone wants.  But Blaine has a very hard time with this concept.  His value of himself is wrapped up in how much he thinks he’s needed, which of course, causes all the problems.  

What’s making it worse is that Blaine begins to manipulate the situation -- trying to make Kurt ‘need’ him again, which is very unhealthy (don’t do that guys!).  But also starts to do what he always does, and we see a repeat of the issues had back in season 3/4.  Blaine starts to pull away physically because he fears he’s not good enough, and in turn, Kurt pulls away emotionally, and it’s just a downward spiral that they keep doing.  

The thing that Blaine is not doing is expressing how he actually feels to Kurt.  When he finally does that at the end of the episode, when he reaches out and says ‘hey I need help’ Kurt is finally there for him.  (Yes, Kurt is still pissed, but at the end of the day, Kurt is not wrong about the fact that he’ll never stop loving blaine -- no matter what happens.)  The problem is, no matter how many times Kurt can say it, or even show it, until Blaine actually trusts him, it’s never going to work.  

As an aside -- one of the reasons I think the second break up actually was good for them, is that Blaine learns how to love himself, and live with himself, after Kurt’s gone.  He’s too attached to defining his self worth based on what Kurt thinks of him -- and that’s not healthy.

(Also, I encourage you to read the Tested Meta -- there is so much to dig into in this episode!) 

Opening Night

There really isn’t much Blaine in this episode - but we do see him use his acts of service love language towards Rachel.  Usually, she’s much better in her response, though.  

I also want to point out that it’s Blaine’s idea to go to the gay bar.  I’m all for Blaine starting to learn where his places in the city are.  Makes me wonder if Kurt and Blaine frequented there together, of this was a Blaine only thing.  Hmm.  

The Back-Up Plan

So... the June Dolloway stuff.  Okay.  

June plays to Blaine’s romantic ideals of what life as a successful performer would be.  And, as we’ve talked about, Blaine’s self worth is based on the idea of how much people need him (or want to use him).  So, he kind of falls into June’s trap, and lets her try to mould him into who she thinks he is.  The problem is, that entails getting rid of Kurt.  But a big part of who Blaine is - is loving Kurt.  

There’s also the issue of competition again (which came up in Tested, too) that I kind of roll my eyes at.  I’m not going to say that Hollywood, or the performing arts, isn’t competitive.  Because it is, in a lot of ways.  However, I feel like media and society are often the ones pushing that narrative.  You can be successful and still support your friends and love ones.  

There’s an entire conversation to be had about how art is subjective, and this idea that this painting is better than that one is just kind of stupid, so all of these fancy awards for things are really, often times, just rich or powerful people stating what they think is the “best” and puts a false equivalency on things that can’t or shouldn’t be pit next to each other.  

So, this whole idea that Blaine is ‘winning’ because June picked him is just -- whatever, Glee.  The thing that I do like, however, is the fact that, despite Kurt being disappointed in the situation, he is still supportive of Blaine and his career.  The thing that I think is a bit contrived is Blaine’s eagerness to please everyone leads him to lie to Kurt instead of be honest about what’s going on with June.  But alas, television. 

However, as we’ve talked about earlier -- Blaine’s ultimate goal is to make everyone happy at the expense of his own happiness, so it isn’t out of nowhere that Blaine would try to please June and Kurt at the same time, in an attempt to ‘fix’ everything before someone rejects him. 

Old Dogs, New Tricks

So... this episode really isn’t about Blaine or the Klaine issues at all.  Chris was perhaps wise (and maybe mandated a little) not to even get into it.  

The thing, though, we do see is that Blaine’s spending a lot of time on his fantasy career ideas with June.  He does recognize that Kurt isn’t really happy with life, and while the Klaine issues will eventually hit the fan, that’s not what this episode is about.  It’s about Kurt trying to find his own place, and make his own happiness, when everyone around him is becoming more successful.  It’s really not Blaine’s issue -- and I’m glad Chris didn’t make it out to be.  

Instead, Blaine plays the supportive partner here, and while they do need to work more of their shit out, I’m glad they do get a softer, and more emotionally aware moment here.  

The Untitled Rachel Berry Project

So, Kurt mentions in this episode that he and Blaine have had some long conversations about their relationship.  And while I’m sure that’s true (probably a lot after Tested), I do have to wonder if Blaine wasn’t listening as well as he should have been.  I think, in order to preserve things, Blaine probably nodded along, and took more notes on how to be the world’s perfect boyfriend, while maybe not actually comprehending some of the issues Kurt laid out.  All the while, I’m guessing that Blaine didn’t express many of his wants or needs, in order to not rock the boat.  Unfortunately, all of this holding back, on both their parts, comes back to haunt them. 

The big lie comes out, that Kurt isn’t in the showcase, and this plays a lot on Kurt’s insecurities, partly about being a failed performer, and a lot about his trust issues with Blaine from the last time they broke up.  Blaine is the type of guy who tries to make everything perfect until he literally can’t anymore, and he’s left there being forced to tell the truth, even though he knows it’ll hurt himself and Kurt.  And while this, normally, would be a minor thing, because of their past history -- this self-imposed forced disappointment is what he expects.  Because he believes that sooner or later, he’s going to eventually disappoint everyone he loves, and they will eventually leave him.  

The thing is -- Blaine has a tendency to push people away, because he thinks that’s what he deserves.  But interestingly, Kurt comes back to him -- and they talk about it.  

And, I’m just gonna quote my Kurt Meta cause I don’t feel like writing it all out, but the Klaine scene here is important! 

So - yeah, let’s break this down…  Kurt’s pretty stiff when he comes to Blaine, arms crossed, looking forward out at the birds and not at Blaine.  He’s thought through is anger, but these kind of conversations are still hard for Kurt.  But then there’s Blaine – who outright says to him that the showcase doesn’t mean anything without Kurt – that /Kurt/ is more important to him than his career.  And Kurt visibly relaxes when he hears this.  Because its confirmation of something he does already know – that Blaine really does love him.  He seems to fuck it up, but he loves him.  And it’s something Kurt really did need to hear again.  

(Obviously vise versa needs to happen, too, but more on that in a second.)

So - Kurt goes on talking about birds, and builds this elaborate metaphor around them – about how taking a step out of the nest is freakin’ scary, but you can’t stay in that nest forever – at some point you have to trust that you can fly.  And even if you fall and hit the ground, you have to keep on trying.  

Well, Kurt comes to the smart conclusion that relationships are like his bird metaphor – you can’t have a relationship unless there is implicit trust there as a foundation.  And he’s learned, the hard way, that yeah, sometimes one of them is going to fuck up and they will hit the ground like a stone, but if you hold on to your faith that it’ll be all fine in the end – that you can help each other out keep that solid foundation, it’ll be okay.  Because at the end of the day, you can’t ever be 100% that someone won’t hurt you again, you can’t control anyone else but yourself (oohh and Kurt letting go of complete control is huge - HUGE).  

And yeah, yeah this little speech is nice and all but what about what’s about to happen? What about the second break up?  Do you guys remember in Dance With Somebody when Blaine says to Kurt - if you’re unhappy talk to me don’t cheat on em?  Well - this is almost the inverse of that.  Kurt says to Blaine that you don’t even know if or when someone’s going to break that trust – and this is true, because yeah, Kurt is going to fuck it up not that long after this conversation.  

But this is a resolution to the original issue back in season 4 – Kurt’s finally understanding that in order for this thing to work, he has to choose to trust Blaine.  Blaine can’t instill that in him – it’s something Kurt has to do for himself.  And for better or worse, he does choose to trust Blaine, to love Blaine, to let Blaine in implicitly.  Blaine has been desperately trying to break through Kurt’s shell since the whole cheating incident, get back into that place in Kurt’s heart.  But what Blaine doesn’t know - or realize - and what Kurt’s just figuring out himself, is that it’s not about Blaine’s ability – it’s about Kurt allowing it to happen.  

Kurt doesn’t let people into his world, past is exterior, implicitly into his heart – but on a smaller scale, this whole June ordeal kind of just puts things into perspective.  Yeah – he was mad about Blaine’s lie – but he realizes that the way Kurt was acting about it, he was going to be hurt either way.  And he can be mad and be angry, but at the end of the day, they all have choices to make, and Kurt makes the decision to still stand by Blaine through the hard stuff as well as the easy stuff.  

(But what about season 6? Well – we’ll talk about that when we get there ;))

I will say this – Kurt never breaks his promise about loving Blaine no matter what.  Even through the stupidity of the second breakup, it’s really not because he doesn’t love Blaine.  That’ll always be apart of him, and the more they go on, the more he understands his own heart will always feel that way.  

Meanwhile – Kurt actually can be (gasp) a loving and supportive partner.  Yeah, it’s hard on him to feel unwanted by June – he’s been fighting that fight since forever.  But he is proud of Blaine, wants Blaine to fly incredibly high – and much like way back when in season 3 with Tony – he’ll be there giving Blaine flowers and telling him how amazing he is.  Which is reassurance that Blaine needs, but doesn’t always get.  

(I realize that’s mostly Kurt’s POV - but it covers what’s going on with Blaine, too.)  

The thing though, while Kurt’s learning what it means to trust again, Blaine really just wants everything to be fine.  And gives in to Kurts wants and needs immediately.  The one problem, really, that’s still lingering is the fact that Blaine is still only defining himself through his relationship, and that’s not good, and is part of the reason Kurt’s going to pull away, and ultimately break up with him, the second time.  

But, we do end the season on a happy note.  Blaine, feeling the love and support from Kurt, is able to stand up to June, and is able to have a moment for himself, where he gets to express his true self, in the form of showing everyone his love for Kurt at the showcase.  We also get a moment of a small step forward when Kurt let’s Blaine have a bit of the loft -- a small space to call his own.  

Yes, ultimately it’s going to break down again, but it’s a first step.  By the end of the season, Blaine and Kurt have started to learn what being in a real, adult relationship is like, but ultimately, for Blaine, he needs to learn to be okay with himself first and foremost, and that is what Season 6 was about... 

If you’d like to continue on, here’s the Season 6 Blaine Meta! 

I know there are things I didn’t get into -- like Blaine’s relationship with Sam, but idk, I don’t think there was much to pick apart there.  

If you guys have any questions on specific things, let me know! :) 

[hogwartsfirebolt]

Hello there! I’m finally here with the third and last part of my favorite drarry fics I read in 2019!!! In the first part and in the second part I recommended 10 stories that made my year, and in this post I’m recommending 10 more that I absolutely adore. The banner art is by @spielzeugkaiser who was really kind and let me use this GORGEOUS piece, which you can (and totally should) reblog right here. Now, without further ado, here’s my,

FAVORITE FICS I READ IN 2019 PART THREE

1. The Company of The Rose - @lower-east-side - 31k - E - Six years after the war, Draco Malfoy has been restoring magical estates, while sidestepping his mother’s plots to marry him off and resolutely avoiding his issues. An advert in the Prophet takes him to a remote island, where a mysterious stranger has purchased an abandoned retreat. But the house has a few secrets of its own, and Draco will be forced to deal with not only his past, but the possibilities of the future.

We’re starting out this list with one of the last fics I read last year, and undoubtedly one of my absolute favorites. It’s gorgeous, sweet, breathtaking, a dozen other adjectives I can’t even think of. Stories that take place in beautiful, secluded places have a special place in my heart, and with a sure hand the author leads us through some of my favorite aspects of the trope: slow forming friendships, the feeling like they’re living in a world of their own as they get to know each other for who they really are, wonderful, delicious sexual tension keeping me breathless until the moment it snaps. The sex pollen element is also worked in a way I had never read before, with an exploration of what happens in the aftermath, addressing the issue of consent it creates. It’s just absolutely phenomenal, every single word of this. 

2. I could be wrong, I could be ready - @harryromper - 57k - M - At first Harry wonders if they’ve managed to destroy his vaults and are trying to tell him in the most oblique way possible. But when he turns the page he realises they’ve found a vault. A vault in the name of Lily and James Potter.The parchment trembles a little in Harry’s hand. He takes another gulp of wine. Harry Potter left Britain after the war and didn’t look back. Ten years later, when Gringotts discovers a vault containing his parents’ belongings—including their badly spell-damaged wedding rings—he’s forced to face up to friends and family who’ve grown in ways he could never imagine, a wizarding London rebuilt beyond his expectations, and the anniversary of the Battle of Hogwarts. And if that wasn’t enough, there’s the entirely unforeseen problem of Draco Malfoy. Featuring pureblood wizarding traditions, ancestral magic, open mic nights, marriage equality, a diner in Brooklyn, and the return of Fleamont Potter.

Explorations of Harry as a character and his post-war issues never fail to hook me right in, and this beautiful fic takes us with him on a journey where he changes so, so much, and at first he does it by running away, thinking everything will remain unchanged as long as he doesn’t acknowledge it, which, of course, isn’t the case. We see him having to face his past, reconnecting with his friends, finding and coming to terms with pieces of himself that he forgot about, or never knew existed in the first place, and it’s absolutely exquisite. The tremendous amount of character development, the regaining of trust in himself and others, the way we can witness a love story blooming slow and steady, and see Harry grow into a confident, wonderful man. God, I have feels for this one, for every detail, every character and setting and emotion. It’s absolutely fantastic. 

3. What Real Thing? - @l0vegl0wsinthedark - 12k - E - They don’t cuddle, they don’t talk about their relationship (or lack thereof) and they certainly never fall asleep in each other’s arms.

This was my year of falling in love with l0ve’s fics. I had read some of her work before, but it was a few months ago that I found myself deep into her ao3 page, nearly weeping with the amount of emotion every single one of her stories stirs up within me. Picking just one was extremely difficult, but I finally chose this one, because the way she paints the relationship between Harry and Draco is masterful, their dynamic shifting and changing little by little, baby steps that become full-on sprints, single-minded and hesitant all at once, until we see them elbows deep into a feeling they don’t even know they’re experiencing, and it’s just brilliant, scorching hot, all-encompassing in a way that made me feel caught up in the whirlwind that is their relationship. If you haven’t yet read anything by l0ve, then I strongly, strongly recommend you start right about NOW. You won’t regret it. 

4. Teeth - @amelior8or - 5k - E - Potter’s been practically begging for it, for months, constantly staring until the air crackles with the intensity of it. Draco always stares back, until all it takes is a brush, a spark, before they go up like flash paper. The crash into each other is inevitable. Draco’s heart has got teeth. And there is nothing he won’t do to keep up the fight with Harry fucking Potter.

I am absolutely, 1000% weak for werewolf stories, and in just 5k words this one managed to enchant and entrance me. It’s hot and fast-paced and intense in the way I love, with their relationship charged with emotion and intensity that transform bickering into passion in the blink of an eye. The moment I reached the end, I went back to the top of the page and reread it that very second, because I had to experience it all over again. Amazing characterization, banter to die for and explosive chemistry are all present in this gem. I kid you not, I’ve read it about six times at this point and just keep going back to that moment in the showers because THAT DIALOGUE IS JUST- wow. 

5. Hush, darling - @magpiefngrl - 23k - E - Draco is in trouble. To get out of it he needs to seduce Harry Potter.

My god what a story this is. Absolutely unique, 23k words that felt like so, so much more because of everything they made me feel. There isn’t a single line of dialogue in this story that doesn’t feel purposeful, the characterizations constructed with such skill that every step the characters take rings true to their essence and gives us another clue to add to the puzzle that is Harry Potter, vulnerable man, powerful man, and Draco Malfoy, in all his darkness and his light. It also features some of the best sex scenes I have read, EVER. I could go on and on about this one, so let me just refer you to my long, individual rec for some more flailing. 

6. The Pirate and the Prince - @nerdherderette - 49k - E - Draco can't believe that fate and circumstance have made him a stowaway on the Master of Death's ship. He doesn't know what's worse: the dread pirate's legendary vendetta against the aristocracy, or the fact that his captor is the most infuriating yet irrefutably fascinating man Draco has ever met.

YES!!!!! YES!!! The moment I saw the cover art for this fic on tumblr my entire being just screamed YES, and it was everything I could’ve hoped for and more. Listen, there is nothing I love more than fics where I get to see Harry as a powerful, ruggedly handsome man who’s not afraid of getting his hands dirty, and in here there’s some of that and MORE, because he’s a freaking PIRATE. And not only did I adore that aspect of it, but the writing pulled me right in, the setting so vibrant I could feel it in my bones, and I just genuinely enjoyed every second of reading this so, so much. There’s ships and adventure and fighting for what’s right, there’s lovely kisses, heated kisses, secret identities and parrot Hedwig. Just, all in all, a great freaking time. 

7. Falling for a Golden Boy - @rockmarina - 44k - E - Merlin. Why couldn’t Draco have moved to a forgotten village in the Alps? He could have turned into a shepherd, learned to make his own damn cheese and given up his damn magic. But no, he’d had to come back to his Eighth year, hadn’t he? And this was his life now. Draping himself over Potter to hear words from him that he knew Potter wouldn’t ever mean.Great. The school year ahead of him looked simply great.“All I know is—when I’m with you, I…” Potter, the heathen, grunted when he read the rest of his line. “Do I really need to say this?”“What, scared of believing your own words, Scarhead?” Draco spat.“Boys,” O’Neill warned them.“All I—all I know is you’re the most amazing person with weak ankles that I've ever met, Meg.” Potter scowled. He was blushing again. “And when I’m with you, I feel less alone.”

My favorite eight year Drarry of all time, probably. I had never before experienced such a beautiful balance of the aftermath of the horrifying events of the war and how they impacted each character, and the light feeling of youthful fun. There are so, so many things to love in the 44k words that make up this masterpiece, so many details that warmed my heart and made me melt inside, so many moments that had me laughing or clutching my chest. In here, you’ll find quite a lot of Hercules references, wonderful teachers, drama club, healing, characters learning to trust, learning to love, learning to cope, beautiful friendships, hopeful romance. It is everything. I talked more about this fic in this individual rec, and I will absolutely talk MORE about it if given the chance. Everyone should read this. 

8. Tease Crossed, Eyes Dotted With A Little Heart - @diligent-thunder - 18k - M -  Draco's a curse-breaker, Harry's an Auror, and they're... something? Maybe? It depends. Harry definitely wants to get laid, Draco wants to follow procedure, and their work wives just want them to stop hiding from the truth. 

I hope you’re not sick of my rambling yet because oooooh boy, THIS ONE. It’s funny, in the way that makes you cover your mouth because you’re about to burst out laughing on the bus, it’s hot, in that casual way that makes you clear your throat and shift your phone just a little, just so the screen can’t be seen by the person sitting beside you because like HELL are you going to stop reading now, it’s sweet, in the way that makes you smile so hard your cheeks hurt, and it’s so detailed and all around so, so much fun to read, in the way that grips you and doesn’t let you go, only to release you when it’s over so you can go and recommend it to your friends, IT’S. SO. GOOD. Real quick: auror + cursebreaker pairing, are-they-friends-with-benefits-or-more, guess-they’d-have-to-actually-TALK-to-know-that, teasing each other in public, getting trapped together for a bit there, powerful female characters, should you guys really be flirting right now? and MORE. Listen, just go read it now and thank me later. 

9. That which hurts (and is desired) - @shealwaysreads - 19k - E - Draco was lying still, and pale, on a bed in a private room in St Mungo’s. The sheets were white, clean, enchanted against stains, vanishing the blood that kept spilling out of him. He hadn’t moved in two days. Not a twitch of his elegant fingers. Not a blink of his fierce eyes. Harry couldn’t even see the faint flutter of his pulse in his throat from where he stood at the foot of the bed, helpless, impotent, furious.

This fic is written so, so beautifully that it aches and leaves such an impression that, thinking back on it, every emotion hits me just as hard as it did when I was reading it. Everything Harry felt, I felt, every moment where he found himself just a little bit more in love with Draco, I was there, every moment of his frustration when Draco is hit with a curse nobody can decipher, I was there for it. With non-linear storytelling, it is evocative, a masterclass in narration, pacing, characterization and beautiful, lyrical writing. I nearly have no words for it. It features: auror partners that work together seamlessly, a dash of pining, a helping of very, very hot sex, and a love story that feels soft like a dream and thrilling like a race. This was the very last story I read in 2019, and I could not have ended the year on a better note. Definitely check this one out.

10. For Thine Is The Kingdom - @kedavranox - 66k - E - On a secret mission, Draco is Turned. With no memory of what happened, he learns that to save his missing Auror partner and regain what he’s lost, he must uncover the long-buried secrets of the vampire covens. To do that, Draco must open his mind and heart to what he has become, the new-found family that surrounds him, and the man who has remained steadfast at his side through it all.Harry spent five years avoiding the man he fell in love with, but when Draco needs his help, he cannot refuse. As they race against the clock to find Draco’s partner, Harry discovers that the bond they share is nothing to hide from, and that he'll never outrun the pace of his own heart.

And last but absolutely not least, there’s this freaking diamond of a story. I swear I want to squeal whenever I remember it. I’ll be brief: it is one of my absolute favorite fics of all time. In here, there’s vampires, unspeakables, a big investigation, wonderful side characters and information given in small little doses as we learn alongside the characters and piece together an entire picture. It’s dazzling, incredibly detailed in every way, with shades to each character and nuances to every interaction and bit of magic we get to see. I feel like anything I can say is not enough, I can never do this story justice. I have tried before, and written the gushiest individual fic rec of my LIFE but just- I honestly have no more words to express how much I think everyone needs to read this. Please, check that rec out, please, check this story out. There is absolutely nothing like it.

----

And that wraps it for 2019! Thank you to all who take the time to check out my lists, and THANK YOU specially if you give these incredible stories a chance, because they deserve all the love in the world. Once again: All the way from here, behind a username and a few tumblr posts, I can honestly say that these 30 stories made my year. I hope they can make yours, too ❤️ If you ever want to discuss these (for tag concerns or plain flailing) (or any story really) my DM’s are always open!!!

[fernrisulfr]

Unpopular FGO Opinion/Rant 2: Bio-Diesel Boogaloo

My second unpopular opinion, though I’ve seen more agreement to this, and there’s a post somewhere that I reblogged which gives a much more comprehensive explanation as to why this is, but “Lostbelt 3: Synchronized Intellectual Nation, SIN” is bad. There’s a few reasons it’s bad.  I will however say this first. Everything about Spartacus? Was good. It was very good. This was a Lostbelt that showed just what Spartacus can be to the narrative. He can be more than just manically shouting about “OPPRESION!!!” in the right setting. My significant other was right when she said the reason he had to die so early in Apocrypha was because had he lived any longer than that, he absolutely would have joined Sieg in starting a Homunculus rebellion. 

So why is Lostbelt 3 bad? A few things. One is that the narrative is very poorly managed. It starts very slow, and almost nothing introduced in the first half actually goes anywhere. Then when we hit the second half of the story the narrative suddenly goes “Oh shit! We’re half done! Better pick up the pace!” and jams it’s foot on the accelerator so that things escalate so quickly barely any of it has time to matter. 

Focusing on the first half of the story, that Vitch was releasing beasts and giants on villages, a point which took up a large chunk of the story, actually went NOWHERE. It really had nothing to do with the story, and the quests themselves brought me back to Orleans where every node and notch was “Here’s two blocks of dialogue. Now fight some Wyverns!”. It was a massive backwards step in FGO’s storytelling. Another issue is that in every Lostbelt so far they’ve tried to give us some sidekick from the world we’re going to prune so we can feel bad about it later, but the one in Lostbelt 3, which he at least got eyes unlike the other anonymous villagers, the kid didn’t even get a NAME. How are we supposed to care about a character with no name and almost no personality to speak of? The kid was quite literally barely more than a generic NPC. 

Speaking of generic NPCs. Let’s talk about how DEEPLY Lostbelt 3 mistreated it’s characters, which is the real crux of why Lostbelt 3 is bad. So Nezha and Mordred just did not matter at all, to the extent they literally got shoved out of the story part way in. Mordred was there for comparison and pairing with Spartacus, but the moment he died she became unimportant and basically didn’t do anything. Nezha started off alright, but then the moment other characters showed up she was likewise shoved to the side, and ultimately out of the story. She basically existed solely to identify that Xiang Yu was a similar existence to herself. Speaking of, Xiang Yu and  Yu Mei-ren’s romance was completely unbelievable. For multiple reasons. Again there’s another tumblr post by someone who’s put more thought into this than I, that explains this better. I’ll try and find it and reblog it again. Anyway. It’s bad and unbelievable. I’ll try to summarize why. Part of the problem is that there’s no real build up to it. It’s a lot of Mei-ren fawning over or being overtly protective of Xiang, and Xiang just being confused. It’s entirely one-sided till almost the end of the story. Then he just does some magic robot calculations and he decides he loves her just like the other Xiang Yu. Which is the other thing the narrative doesn’t pay enough attention to in this “romance”. HE’S NOT THE SAME GUY. Like he’s the “same guy” but an alternate reality version. Mei-ren basically found her husband’s doppleganger and decided to cling to him hoping it’d be the same/because she couldn’t bare to watch another man with that face die. Which could have been very interesting! Really! But it wasn’t paid enough attention to or written properly to BE interesting. Honestly the relationship between Xiang and Mei-ren could have formed an emotional backbone to the story, and instead it’s just kinda off to the side and comes up occasionally, but it’s “super important really!” by the end of the story. 

Related to this is also Gao Changgong, Prince of Lanling, who was UTTERLY UNIMPORTANT. Like he should have been! The Lostbelt started off super strong with that exchange between Gao and Mei-ren in the past, and then the narrative did nothing with it. Gao barely said anything the whole Lostbelt when he should have been more relevant to the plot! He should have been a confidante to Mei-ren! It should have come up that he was happy to be able to see her again in “another life” (such as being a Servant is like living again, albeit briefly). He should have been more involved with Mei-ren and Xiang Yu! Like it could have been done so many ways! He could have been her wingman! Or he could have been her confidante who she talked to about her struggle with Xiang Yu being Xiang Yu but not being HER Xiang Yu. Instead he just didn’t do much, died earlier than any Crypter servant so far in their own Lostbelt, and became utterly irrelevant. 

Red Hare and Chen Gong appeared part way into the story, and served no purpose beyond being Comic Relief, which was a real disservice; especially because their summoning was supposed to be important. It follows after the death of Spartacus, where the Lostbelt suddenly becomes connected to the throne of Heroes because the people regain hope and the concept of a Hero. Their arrival is SIGNIFICANT and then the narrative goes on to do nothing with them. Literally anyone could have been summoned and it would have played out the same. That’s how much their appearance mattered. 

Old Man Li was there, but he also didn’t matter. Specifically it didn’t matter that he was Old Man Li. It doesn’t even come up. It literally could have been anyone. Could have been just some dude, and narratively it would have been the same. 

Which is largely the biggest problem with the narrative. Most of the Servants/Characters present could have been literally anyone and it would have been almost exactly the same. Who anyone was largely did not matter. 

Now let’s address the insect in the room, Emperor Mothman himself,  Shi Huang Di. He was bad. Not like “he was a bad guy”. I mean he was just bad. Poorly written and uninteresting. He was unsympathetic and poorly written. Now. Let me be clear, a villain doesn’t need to be sympathetic. My problem here is that he was unsympathetic, but at the very end of the story they tried to act like he was. I felt nothing for this character, and still do not. He was poorly written and the aspects of him that could have been interesting were under utilized. Also not a fan of his design personally, or at least not compared to images I’ve seen of what he apparently looked like before he became a super-computer, followed by his new moth bod. That’s just a matter of personal preference though and I have no real issues with his physical design. Point is he’s boring. Like everyone else in the story, and despite being there for most of it, he was under utilized, didn’t do much, and his role could have been filled by just about anyone and it would have played out the same. 

And that’s my rant. There’s honestly more to criticize, like the unnecessary on screen torture of Vitch, the generic battles, everything about Liangyu, but I am starting to lose my motivation two rants in, and I fear anything I say at this point will just be me repeating myself. My point is, Lostbelt 3 is bad, and of the first three lostbelts it’s narratively the weakest. (Lostbelt 2 had a LOT of problems, but it was still better. I am at least a little biased though due to a love of Norse Mythology and Sigurd, though those things also make me about three times as judgey as a normal person.).  Anyway. Lostbelt 3 bad. That’s just my opinion. Agree or Disagree, you’re entitled to feel what you do about the matter. 

[imagitory]

Favorite twst boys?

Oooohoohoo, you wish me to talk about my Night Raven College baes? Let’s see then...

Ace Trappola ~ Okay, so I should admit right off the bat that I have a huge soft spot for the Heartslabyul dorm in particular. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll are one of my favorite things ever, and so most adaptations of those works tend to give me some amount of glee, even the really flawed ones. But for Ace specifically, it took me a little while to warm up to him, given that he can be a real prat, but once he and Deuce really rallied around Yuu (especially when they dropped everything on their winter break and took the bus all the way back to school during the Scarabia incident to try to rescue them and Grim -- MY HEART!!!), I fully adopted Ace as my second trash son and that was that. I also loved Ace’s development in the Ghost Bride story line, as well as his admittedly harsh, but still rather fair tear-down of Riddle immediately pre-Overblot. Ace can be really harsh sometimes, but that also makes him an incredibly honest sort who won’t take anyone else’s bull and won’t let anyone push him around -- yet at the same time, he’s also lighthearted enough that he never takes himself too seriously. In some ways he kind of reminds me of Jounouchi Katsuya from Yu-Gi-Oh!, and that’s definitely a compliment.

Deuce Spade ~ MY ORIGINAL TRASH SON. I loved Deuce pretty much from the get-go, considering how passionate he was about trying to fix the mistake with the chandelier and how adorable he was casting the only magic he could manage (“COME FORTH, CAULDRON!” XDD). Then there was the whole “chick” incident where we not only saw his delinquent side which he tries so desperately to hide on full display for the first time, but we also got to see how much he truly loves his mom and how friggin’ stupid and yet absolutely sincere he is, and I just fell in love with Deuce even more. The Wish Upon a Star event where we learn Deuce wants to basically be this world’s equivalent of a sheriff after having been such a delinquent in his younger years only made me feel all the more for this guy -- him wanting to be so much better than he was even if he’s not the smartest, strongest, or most talented guy around I find so compelling and likable.

Riddle Rosehearts ~ Yeah, I know, a lot of Heartslabyul love, but like with Ace, it took me a LONG while to warm up to Riddle. I thought he was a total jerk and I wanted nothing more than to give him a good telling-off (“go ahead, use that stupid collar on me -- I don’t have magic for you to block, you bullying prat!”) until Ace got around to punching Riddle in the face and then tearing him a verbal new one for me. It honestly took Riddle’s Overblotting for me to feel the least bit sorry for him, but it was how sincerely he acted after the fact in trying to make up for his mistakes that really softened my heart to him. Riddle has lived his whole life following rules and convention to the letter, and it’s made him miserable, so now that he’s come to grips with the fact that he doesn’t need to be miserable in order to live an upstanding life, he’s softened a bit. Even with this, though, that rule-abiding, upstanding attitude isn’t always hard to shake, and I think it makes for a much more balanced outcome than if Riddle just went hog-wild and stopped caring about everything -- because the whole reason Riddle followed the rules so closely is he wanted to do what was best for all and to be the best he could be, too. His motivation for being so strict came from a deep passion for leadership and order, and I’m glad that passion of Riddle’s wasn’t dampened, but instead given nuance. Now he can focus his passion more effectively, rather than lashing out in all directions indiscriminately. Like Ace as well, I loved Riddle’s development in the Ghost Marriage plot line, particularly his individual side story with Malleus. It really showcased Riddle’s noblesse oblige moral code, which I personally find the most compelling and likable aspect of his personality.

Jack Howl ~ JACK IS A GOOD BOY. Anyone who disagrees can fight me. (LOL, not really, but...) Like with Deuce, I liked Jack pretty much immediately. From the start, he just came across as so much more down-to-earth and honest than either of the other two main characters from Savanaclaw (even if Jack is also a total tsundere, but honestly, if you’ve watched any kind of anime, you’re fluent enough in “tsundere” as a language to know exactly what Jack really thinks of something). He was sort of depicted as a black sheep in his own dorm, and -- honestly? -- I’m a sucker for characters that are sort of on the fringes and don’t quite conform to what people expect them to be. Add to that how passionate Jack is about working hard and being the best he can be in his own right, as well as how deathly loyal he is, and he’s just overall a character I would love being friends with.

Jamil Viper ~ Jamil was the first character who Overblots who I actually felt sympathy for long before we see his side of the story in flashback form. Part of this admittedly is because I could sort of see where Jamil and Kalim’s story was going ahead of time, but the other reason is that I could see how much work Jamil put in all the time. Even though yeah, it was a real dick move to try to foist out Kalim so he could become Head of Scarabia instead, and yes, he manipulated things to make everyone see Kalim as cruel and irrational, it doesn’t change the fact that Jamil still acted like a Dorm Head a lot more than Kalim did a lot of the time, in the sense of making sure things run smoothly. Kalim definitely brings amazing enthusiasm to Scarabia as its leader and inspires a lot of positive feelings in the people around him, but if there’s a problem, it’s Jamil who often ends up fixing it, not Kalim. And from the start, I really felt for this guy who Kalim -- simply due to privilege -- didn’t seem to acknowledge he was demanding so much of, without receiving the same kind of attention and appreciation in return. I never disliked Kalim for this, because I could tell Kalim didn’t mean it maliciously and admittedly Jamil really should’ve said something since Kalim adores Jamil and would have likely been more than receptive to hearing what he had to say...but at the same time, given their power imbalance, it’s also not completely unsurprising that Jamil didn’t feel like he could say something. The best part about Jamil for me, at least, ended up coming out after he was allowed to finally speak his mind. Yeah, maybe he’s a little meaner now. Yeah, maybe he’s not so patient or amiable now. But he’s also allowed to show more of that deep, searing passion and ambition he’s been bottling up for so long. I loved seeing how much he enjoys dancing and performing through the Fairy Gala event and the recent Pomefiore chapter. I’ve loved how thoroughly (and pretty justifiably) distrustful he is of Azul. I’ve loved how he’s sort of on the fence emotionally about looking after Kalim the way he used to and making sure Kalim doesn’t expect his service the way he subconsciously did before. Jamil is one of the TWST characters who surprised me the most in how much I enjoy him, and I honestly can’t wait to see how much more he grows.

Epel Felmier ~ I WILL PROTECT THIS BOY, OKAY. Not because he’s delicate-looking, but because damn it, if he wants to eat macaroons and steak with the wrong fork, then he should be allowed to just go out and do it. I absolutely love the contrasts we’ve already seen in Epel so far. For as sweet and bishounen as his face is, he has a real rough, informal side fitting his background as a kid from the country, and yet he also has his “Prince Charming” moments too. He completely on his own comes up with the idea to arrive riding a horse when trying to impress the Bride during the Ghost Marriage event, and yet he’ll also tear into a bunch of ghosts who dare mistake him for a girl. Epel reminds me of a friend of mine from high school who also was a lot gruffer and more cynical than his short height and cute face would suggest, and it makes for a very interesting character, I think. You can’t pin this kid down or put him in a single box, and I think that’s awesome.

Vil Schoenheit ~ All right. Before the Pomefiore chapter, I thought there was no way in Hell that I would ever warm up to Vil. His slapping of people’s butts in the Fairy Gala event, his superficial focus on exterior beauty, and his bullying, condescending attitude toward Epel in particular really made me dislike him from the get-go. But then the Pomefiore chapter started and we reached the auditions...and I found myself agreeing with just about every critique he made, in contrast to Rook’s sunnier, fawning reviews. It made me feel like I was watching American Idol or America’s Got Talent and agreeing with Simon Cowell (which I honestly almost always did, whenever I watched those!). And as the Pomefiore chapter’s unfolded, I’ve seen that fascinating contrast in Vil. Yes, he’s very superficial -- but his dream is to act and be an idol, and in that world of celebrity, appearances are important. Yes, he’s very conceited -- but he’s also an incredibly hard worker who’s put in a lot of effort to improve himself and his talents to the point that he should be proud of them. Yes, he’s almost cruel in how relentlessly he pushes people -- but he never holds anyone to a standard he wouldn’t also expect of himself. Yes, he’s very forceful and sees his way as the only way -- but he does truly want those people to succeed in his own weird way, even if he can’t properly express it. Not to mention the fact that he’s constantly typecast as villainous characters, and he just wants to be a hero who makes it to the final curtain call!! My heart!! It’s made it so that like with Jamil, I’ve found sympathy for Vil long before he Overblots, and so I’m all the more eager to see how both the Overblot itself and its aftermath impacts Vil as a character and his relationships with the other characters.

Malleus Draconia ~ Oh, come on, who doesn’t love Tsunotaro? This precious child needs all of the love and party invitations in the world! (And yes, he may be an immortal fae, but he’s still a precious child to me, so there.) I would totally love chatting about gargoyles and grotesques with him. X3

[cartoonfangirl1218]

Royal Friends Headcanons

Because they are good friends, business meetings tend to be relaxed, not so much tension of someone wanting more than their share, they all just want to work together to get the best outcome. 

However, for some it can get so friendly that Alonso and/or Chloe would go off wanting to discuss personal stories and just having fun rather than treaty work. Though when they do get together to party Hoo boy. They party. There's no party like a royal party. And I don't mean Esteban's fancy waltz, seven chambermaids to seven men, I mean the Galdonian chair dances and mulberries and impromptu olaball matches and dance-offs. It's a lot of fun, and no one but a fellow royal really gets how much a party is needed for stress relief. 

Being the only two princes, Alonso quickly took Marzel under his wing to become his best "bro" and his wingman. And though sometimes Alonso's "legendary" plans are disastrous, they are a good influence on each other with Alonso helping Marzel be more outgoing and Marzel bringing Alonso back down to earth. 

Alonso plans to bring Prince Ari under his wing when he gets older. Rebecca not-so-jokingly swears it will be under her dead body. She likes Alonso, but she doesn't trust him to be a good babysitter much less a good role model. 

The girls have royal girls night which is basically a spa weekend with some olaball thrown in, and dressing room fashion shows. Sometimes there’s matching outfits at Val’s insistence. And yes, they it looks awesome.

Chloe and Marisa became such fast friends. Their bubbliness overflows into one another and they're the two main huggers of the group. Plus they both are very interested in learning about each other's worlds, and Marisa can gently but firmly guide Chloe when she backslides in social habits of oblivious selfishness. Also Marisa is always up for helping Chloe journey back to the territory of the sea nymphs and visit her gf Maliga. 

Rebecca develops a snarky relationship with Alonso since she was one of the few that doesn't fall for Alonso's charms or tangos AT ALL. He likes to tease her about her perfectionism and she mocks his playboy attitude. They act like they can't stand each other, but also are brutal when they team up for olaball. When Valentina joins their team, basically the match is won before they even do anything. 

Valentina was a bit perturbed by Chloe's touchy-feeliness, especially when it smushes her ruffles, but she comes to enjoy Chloe's positivity. They really enjoy shopping together too and admire the materials found in the other's countries. 

Valentina sometimes takes Marisa and Marzel as her "pet projects" in teaching them the ways of the human world, and outfitting them in the best of the best Paroisan outfits even if they cannot walk in the many layers and in Marisa's case, the corset.

Chloe, Marisa and Rebecca have ongoing bets on Valentina and Alonso, and Eleteo's relationships.  

More and specific Elena and XY hcs under cut.

Marzel has a small crush on Rebecca, best displayed that whenever Rebecca has to take a trip overseas, he volunteers to guide the ship in case of rocks, even if it takes a couple of weeks, and he has his own princely duties. But he is smitten enough to forget that he has his own kingdom. Rebecca finds it sweet and is considering seeing where it goes especially with Marisa's jokes that they can be sisters-in-law. 

Rebecca is lowkey the mom friend of the group, always trying to find solutions to other's problems and trying to make events enjoyable for everyone. 

Alonso is the one who unofficially cheers the other's up. He doesn't do emotions, and likes to keep things light, so he's the one to go for jokes and pratfalls and caricaturing himself, bound to put the smile back on their faces. 

Chloe gives the best gifts. Not all yachts like King Hector, but very sweet and personal homemade ones.

Elena and Alonso

They still have a teasing flirtation with Alonso knowing it won't go anywhere and Elena always smirking as she shoots him down. But now Elena freely helps Alonso with his romantic woes with Valentina when he endearingly, frantically asks for help to show Val how he cares without looking lame and "whipped." 

In return, Alonso offers free advice which Elena ignores because she doubts Mateo will like the things which Alonso claims "all men want."

Alonso gives Elena updates on how Charoca and Charica are and sends the lava crystals that they send as gifts. 

They enjoy having dance-offs and whenever Alonso wants to show off some new moves, Elena is usually his partner because she picks up dances quickly and they are surprisingly in-sync a lot of the time (they did do an amazing impromptu tango the first day they met after all).

Alonso actually enjoys indulging in her love of puns. Even if he thinks they're lame, he still does them till Elena is crying with laughter.

Elena and Valentina

Elena and Val are probably the closest even if they sometimes fall into a friendly competition. Elena likes to try out her magical expertise, and her new spells that Mateo has taught her with Valentina who is a very proficient wizard in her own right.  Their kingdoms actually hold wizard exchanges and Elena often invites Mateo to join her meetings with Valentina because watching Mateo and Val geek out about magic to be amusing. As well as Mateo's silent frustration at her boasting.

Now they are allies in the kingdoms, they make amazing teammate on the olaball field and invented the Double-Trouble Queen fastball. 

Elena actually taught Valentina to cook since Val had made it part of her royal duty to learn about all different aspects.

Their first dish was pan dulce, with Avaloran chocolate. In return, Val has taught Elena some new hairstyles with copious locks and waves, with some of the best Paraisan hair ornaments.

Elena and Marisa

Marisa gave Elena multiple, stylishly dyed kelp shirts for her visits to Coronado and inadvertently created a trend for kelp clothes. 

Much like Ariel, Marisa goes to Elena to confirm or ask about new human objects that come to the shores that Camila no longer recognizes. 

Marisa got Elena addicted to romance novels that are apparently very popular in Nueva Vista and they spend some beach days laughing about some of the cheesy paragraphs and then they talk about their own romantic lives or the lives of others.

Elena and Marisa do amazing duets together and every year on the Human-Sirena Treaty to celebrate the improved relations. 

Elena and Marisa took crossbow lessons from the Turners, and have an ongoing competition for who can get the most center targets. So far Marisa is in the lead with 3-1. It's slow-going.

Elena and Marzel Elena and Marzel enjoy each other's company a lot during kingdom negotiations. They find they have a similar worldview with formerly having a black & white morality, insecurities in living up to their fathers and so they work well together in working toward a common goal. They enjoy the feeling of accomplishment.

Marzel taught Elena how to play Hermit Hold'em which is basically a poker game, and soon the two were running around Coronado's casinos, having the time of their lives. But that was a bad idea with all the money they wasted, they have been banned by their family members. 

Elena urges Marzel to participate in athletics and helped to teach him olaball, and fencing, the latter which Marzel was surprisingly proficient thanks to his own battle training. But he still enjoys frisbee the best. 

Elena also helps undo some of Alonso's more damaging advice about how to act on the human world, especially in regards to girls. 

They both share their concerns about their younger siblings, while Marisa and Isabel see them as overprotective and overly cautious, they think Isabel and Marisa are impulsive and jump into situations before they're ready. It's nice when you have someone who automatically agrees with you on things. 

Elena and Chloe Elena and Chloe share the same humor when it comes to puns, and always greet each other with a hug and a pun. 

Chloe tends to go off-topic when she sees her friends again instead of focusing on business as she should, but she also asks questions about the other's lives (as Elena once taught her or sang to her to be more precise) and then Elena gets dragged in describing the latest event that her kingdom faced and a whole afternoon goes by before they go back to the treaty Elena came for. 

Chloe gave Elena a taste of some of the best mulberry pies which Elena quickly consumed and had seconds. Which Chloe made into a friendly pie eating contest. 

Chloe takes Elena on hikes through Norburg's amazing pine trails and Elena shares some of the "winning" yoga moves that Ixlan taught her. 

Chloe gives Elena updates on the relationship between Abigail and Hector and proudly details her own diplomatic skills when they fight. Elena is just glad it's not her who has to do it.  Elena and Rebecca 

Rebecca became a sort of big sister inventor to Isabel, though she's not as knowledgeable in STEM, she has the creative knack for it and helps bridge the gap between Isabel's scientific talk and Elena's out-of-the-box thinking. 

Elena and Rebecca share a love for cultural events and what it means to bring the kingdoms' communities together so they often trade lessons on important dances and foods. 

Rebecca and Elena both have a tendency to focus on the minutiae of event/business details when they feel stressed with something. Luckily, it's not at the same time and usually can talk the other off the brink.   Though Rebecca tends to hold herself to a high standard, Elena helped to unleash her fun side and created a vicious prank master. Prince Ari blames Elena for all of it. 

Elena and Rebecca are often the first ones to go for adventures like rock climbing or horse racing and the others are jealous of how easily they take to things like that. 

[greatqueenanna]

The hints that lead to Hans’ betrayal.

Frozen is iconic for many reasons. The songs, the beautiful story of sisterly love, the fun and well written characters, and of course - the twists. Frozen set up a red herring by making you believe that Anna needed romantic love in order to break her frozen curse, only to reveal that she saved herself by her selfless sacrifice for familial love. But that wasn’t the only twist.

In order to warn their audience about risky relationships, the creators of Frozen came up with Prince Hans; the sociopathic young man that took advantage of the fear running rampant in Arendelle to feed into his sense of entitlement.

Hans is arguably, in my opinion, the greatest Disney villain of all time. He’s unique in the fact that he played the protagonists and the audience, and came very close to succeeding in his plans. However, what others feel about Hans is complicated. Some agree that he’s a great villain, but many feel that his twist came out of nowhere, and that there were no hints that lead to his betrayal. This has led many to come up with claims and theories as to why he suddenly became evil, which I discuss a few of them here.

I’m here to tell you that there were actually quite a few hints, both subtle and obvious, that hinted that Hans was going to turn on Anna when the right opportunity came along. Since this is a fairly longer analysis, I will continue this one under the keep reading tab.

Hint 1: You Can’t Marry a Man You Just Met

One of the biggest indicators that something was wrong in Anna’s choice to marry Hans was the reaction she received from both Elsa and Kristoff. When Elsa hears about it, she has to keep herself from laughing. Then when Anna persists, Elsa proclaims that Anna cannot marry someone she just met. Later on, when Anna is explaining to Kristoff what happened with Elsa, he is much more concerned with Anna telling him that she got engaged to someone she met that day. He goes on the criticize and mock her (playfully), not only here but also later on. This is the most obvious evidence, because both characters feel that Anna is making a very bad choice, and this plot element is pretty much the reason Anna and Elsa fight in the first place. If nothing was to come of this, then it wouldn’t of been mentioned in the first place.

Hint 2: How He Really Feels.

The above scene is very famous for showing how Hans actually feels about Anna’s comment, we finish each other’s sandwiches. Here, we clearly see that he thinks she’s ridiculous. However, its not the only scene that shows his true feelings about Anna.

In this scene, Hans is reacting the Anna’s comment “It’s just me.” To which he laughs, and repeats “Just you?” Jen Lee comments that this was the scene that Hans realized that Anna did not think highly of herself; thus, she was easy to manipulate. However, without the prior knowledge of the interview, we can clearly see his expression here is of curiosity, and almost judgmental or confused.  We can see that he finds her lack of self-esteem laughable.

Hans’ comment here is so direct, that even Anna realizes how mean it sounds. Here, Hans tries to defend Anna when she says “I’m completely ordinary!” and he replies with “That’s right, she is.” Although he’s trying to defend her, he pretty much lets slip that he feels she is ordinary and boring; nothing like Elsa.

These three scenes shows us Hans’ opinion of Anna: Ridiculous, laughable, and boring. Basically, he thinks she’s stupid. He cements these feelings in his reveal speech, when he proclaims that Anna was so desperate for love, she made a foolish decision in wanting to marry him, without knowing anything about him.

Hint 3: Drastic Changes in Personality.

One of the staples of people who are sociopaths is their ability to mirror others. Now, everyone has the ability to change their demeanor when they are with certain people. For example, a person will act more mature at work and act more goofy with friends. However, aspects of their original personality will always shine through no matter what. This is not the case for Hans.

For example, when Anna hangs around Elsa for the first time, she tries to act more mature and gentle, but she still seems to second guess and fumble over her words. Same with Elsa; in Frozen 2 Elsa is able to be very collected around nobles, but her more awkward and goofy personality shines through when she accidentally freezes the balcony ledge. Also, while she more comfortable with the people she loves, she is still shy and awkward around them while playing charades.

This is not how Hans is, because he is trying to conceal his true personality. He goes from being goofy and clumsy with Anna, to suddenly mature and vulnerable with Elsa. Then, he drops the nice prince facade all together when the Duke threatens Anna’s image with Arendelle (because this will also put him in a predicament as well). To better explain this, let’s say Hans was truly exactly like Anna. Notice that while Anna also stands up to the Duke, she’s more hesitant and unsure. Hans would be the same way in the scene above. He wouldn’t suddenly start yelling at the Duke and with a confidant and direct demeanor. He would hesitate a bit, maybe even show a bit of regret at what he said. But he doesn’t, and this greatly contradicts who he was trying to be around Anna.

Thus, even if someone doesn't know he’s supposed to be a sociopath, the extreme jumps in personality is very unusual and unsettling.

Hint 4: Subtle Nods

Throughout Frozen there are small, easy to miss on the first viewing, hints that push towards Hans’ betrayal. the above scene is the most famous one, as not only for a small second he has a sinister smile, he is also hinting at what he really wants. In responds to Anna’s “Suddenly I bump into you.” he states “I’ve been searching my whole life to find my own place.” Thus, while Anna is talking about finding him, he is talking about finding Arendelle.

Here, after Elsa just refused to give her blessing, Hans tries to ease Elsa’s suspicions, to which she denies him. Anna’s reaction is sadness, while Hans looks offended. This attitude displayed here, again, contradicts the mature persona he tries to put on in front of Elsa.

This scene shows off Hans’ more selfish nature. In comparison to Kristoff giving Anna his hat and holding her close to him when she is freezing from the curse, Hans warms himself and is completely oblivious that Anna is much more vulnerable than him in her tiny dress. Honestly, a comparison between Hans’ actions and Kristoff’s actions towards Anna warrants an analysis all on its own, but we’ll save that for another time.

Shortly after the above scene, when Anna announces that she is going to find Elsa on her own, Hans panics. He begs her not go on her own. But When Anna announces that she needs him in Arendelle to watch over it, his expression suddenly changes. He is now strangely happy and honored, and is much more willing to let her go. Now that Anna has given him the power he wanted; he has no real use for her now.

The final subtle hint, is the scene at the Ice Palace. Although Hans at first tries to plea to Elsa to not be a monster, he quickly changes his tune and tries to kill her. He looks up at the chandelier after noticing that the Guard is trying to kill her, and aims the arrow at it; making it seem like her death was accident. Thankfully, Elsa was able to get out of the way in time. 

In Conclusion

Hans came to Arendelle in order to court Elsa and become a King. When she was too difficult to reach, he settled for princess Anna, who seemed to be an easier victim to manipulate. He would marry her and then stage an accident for Elsa, making the two of them the ruling monarchs. But with every magical twist and turn that happened, Hans had to adjust his plans accordingly, trying to paint Anna in a positive light and protecting her to ensure his meal ticket. When the dignitaries informed him that if Anna perished Arendelle would fall to him, he was finally able to let his guard down and leave Anna behind. The only thing he didn’t expect was a little magical snowman to ultimately ruin his plans and help Anna stop him. All of this is hinted at throughout the film, and it shows how calculating and manipulative he really is.

[thetrailofyourbloodinthesnow]

Hindu Mythology Event // Day 6 - Underrated Relationships

Lakshman and Urmila

(I had originally planned something different for today, but this fic popped in my head, and I amazed myself by managing to write it in a few days. So enjoy some fluff of these two after Lakshman's return to Ayodhya) (Also in AO3)

"Really, Mila. You don't have to..."

Lakshman was promptly shushed by his wife as she lead him by the hand into the baths. "I want to do it."

He had long ago sworn to himself that when the blessed day of their reunion came, he wouldn't deny her anything she asked of him. So, he stopped protesting and followed her like an obedient child.

Still, he would have preferred to do this by himself. In the last 14 year he hadn't given much thought to his aspect. The grooming and bedecking that were a vital part of courtly life had to be abandoned in the harsh austerities demanded by the forest exile. Royal silks and oiled hair were replaced by clothes of bark and matted hair, but he'd hardly care. Besides, for most of that time the only people that had been around to see him had been Ram and Sita, who were in the same unkempt and unclean state as he was.

He knew he looked nothing like the dashing prince that had left Ayodhya all those years ago, but seeing his reflection in an actual mirror (he had only seen it in rivers and ponds in the forest) and contrasting his looks with those of his twin made him realize just how much he had changed.

"Goodness, I need a bath!" He'd exclaimed, making his family laugh. In reality, he needed far more than a bath but he figured that was a good place to start. He'd tried to excuse himself from everyone to go get clean, but Urmila insisted on helping him.

"You must have expected your prince charming to come swaggering through the palace gates," he told her while she poured perfumes and flower petals into the water for his bath. "And instead, you wondered who was that wild ascetic that was walking toward you." He felt a little ashamed of not having thought of tidying himself up a little bit for her.

"Doesn't matter what I thought." The corners of her mouth curled up. "I'll have my prince charming when I'm done here."

She made him take off his tattered clothes and get into the water. He sighed when he entered the tub, it'd been a long time since he'd had a hot bath and he'd forgotten how good it was for his strained muscles. Urmila began soaping and scrubbing his skin, rubbing it with turmeric and herbal pastes until all the grime and filth that had accumulated in his pores had been drawn out, leaving his skin smooth and soft. She raised an eyebrow to the scratches and bruises that covered his body, but didn't comment on them. She'd already been told everything would be explained later.

Before they arrived back home, Ram had asked them to restrain from telling everyone what had happened during their exile, at least for a few days. Not everything was kept secret, though; the flying chariot that had dropped them in Ayodhya and the talking monkey that accompanied them weren't the kind of things that could wait for an explanation. But for the rest - Ravan, Sita's kidnapping, the war - it was better to wait until they were fully settled in before telling the story.

Lakshman agreed, there was no need to overwhelm their love ones with the full account of their 'adventures' and to make themselves revive them so soon after the facts. To think that only a few days ago, he'd been fighting side by side with monkeys and bears against an army of demons!

It's strange, he thought while he brushed off the dried blood under his nails. A part of me feels like it happened years ago, while another feels like I'm still there.

After she had cleaned him fully, Urmila move on to his beard. It was a long, tangled, unruly thing. She first trimmed it with sharp scissors and then shaved it off, leaving only a mustache, the tips of which she oiled and curled upwards. Lakshman felt oddly naked without his beard, but decided it was worth it after feeling Urmila's soft fingers against his bare skin.

She saved the hardest part for the end: his hair. It took a lot of patience and effort to untangle the rat's nest on top of his head. She had to first soften it with oils and then separated it into small sections that she would then try to past a comb through. If it were for Laksman he would have cut it all off and save himself the trouble, but Urmila had a frown of determination in her face. So he kept quiet and let her continue her ministrations, only wincing whenever her comb got trapped in a knot. "Sorry," she would mutter every time it happened. At last, his hair was freed of tangles and Urmila was able to run her fingers through it.

He sat there for some time, throwing his head back and closing his eyes, enjoying the feeling of her nails softly scraping his scalp. It had been a while since he'd felt so at peace. In the darkest times he had feared this peace would never come again. But there it was, after so long. Hopefully, it had come to stay.

"Lakshman," Urmila's whisper broke his reverie. He opened his eyes slowly to look at his wife, and his heart skipped a beat when he saw how she was looking at him. Her always bright eyes seemed to burn now, scorching with the unmistakable flames of desire. His treacherous mind made his stomach flip by reminding him of the last time that a woman had looked at him like that. But no, he told himself, this is different. There was no edge of possessiveness in Urmila's eyes, no tinge of desperation. Just a tender request.

She was so beautiful, this wife of his. Far more than he'd remembered. Either his memory hadn't done her justice, or she had grown lovelier with the years. Her round face was like a full moon, with dimpled cheeks that still gave her an air of innocence. Her almond-shaped eyes were like two brown pools that he could gladly drown in, with long thick eyelashes that grazed her cheeks like two black fans. And her lips were plump and perfectly curved, looking as soft as rose petals. They drew him in, irresistibly pulling him by an invisible thread until he was touching them with his own lips.

They kissed tentatively at first, as if dipping their toes in the water, before taking a full dive, growing more passionate, more hungry for each other. After a while, Urmila broke the kiss, leaving Lakshman panting, and taking a step back, she began to loosen her clothes. She had clearly changed since he'd last seen her. The girl he'd married never lost the shyness of a new bride, blushing and lowering her glance whenever she undressed in front of him. The woman that stood in front of him now didn't take her eyes from his as she unwrapped her saree and let the fabric drop to the floor, displaying her nakedness without a hint of shame.

Lakshman inhaled sharply. For years he had constrained his baser desires with the painstaking discipline demanded by the life of an ascetic he'd been living. Well, that constrain was thoroughly shaken by the sight of Urmila's naked body. Its perfection aroused the lust the had never been fully quenched, only lay dormant waiting for her.

She sat straddling him, laying on top of his chest and pressing her forehead against his. They both moaned when their bodies came into contact, but neither of them moved afterwards. They stayed perfectly still, holding each other so close they could both feel the other's trumping heartbeat.

"I spent so many nights tossing and turning in my bed," she said in a low husky voice. "Dreaming of the day I would touch your body with mine again." Her eyes now showed a hint of pain behind the desire. "That bed was so cold and lonely."

His own heart ached. He began a string of apologies, but she quieted him. "Shhh, don't apologize. Make it up to me."

He felt that it would take a whole life to make it up to her, but he was willing to start then. He began venturing his hands all over her, feeling every crevasse, every curve of her body, while she clung to his shoulders, nuzzling his neck with little kisses that drove him mad. He wanted to take it slow, to enjoy every second of it, but Urmila was too eager in her passion, making him struggle to keep her pace... Only to have him reach the finish line too soon after starting the race.

His face burned with the shame of it. "I'm sorry... Umm... I... It-it's been a while," he mumbled a pitiful apology. He wanted to slap himself. Not even when he was a green boy had he embarrassed himself so thoroughly.

Urmila shook her head, and lay limp on top of him, burying her face in his shoulder. After a few moments, he felt her breathing become ragged and her tears dampened his shoulder. He opened his mouth to apologize again, but she spoke first, her voice a tremulous murmur, "Please don't ever leave again."

A hard knot lodged his throat. When he had parted all those years ago, they both have made promises of faithfulness and eternal love. But 14 years was a long time. They both had grown up and changed immensely during their separation. They had barely known each other back then, and now they were virtually strangers. His biggest fear upon his return was to find that she had grown indifferent of her distant husband, or worse, that she hated him for having abandoned her in the prime of her youth, when she had been ready to give him all the love that she possessed. And he couldn't have blamed her for it.

He had practiced for years what he would say, how he would ask for her forgiveness upon seeing her. But when he stood in front of front of her, he was speechless. He'd stayed frozen in place, not knowing what to do, for what it felt like an age but must have only been a few seconds. Until she overcame her own hesitation and thrown herself into his arms, crying that she had waited for him, had thought of him every day, and hadn't stopped loving him all this time. He'd lifted her up and spun her around, crying and laughing, and knowing himself to be so lucky that she had guarded her heart for him, as he had guarded his for her. He couldn't repay her loyalty by abandoning her again.

He made her face him, and wiped the tears from her cheeks. Staring into her eyes, he spoke; "Even if I had to leave, I would take you with me," he swore with a voice choked with emotions. "I won't spend another day away from you." The smile she gave him was shaky but it warmed his heart nevertheless.

Lakshman was a man of the Raghu clan, who were always true to their word. And he gave her his word then; that for as long as he lived, he wouldn't let her sleep in a cold lonely bed again.

[harry-sussex]

You're lovely, and I enjoy seeing your blog on my dashboard. I'm sorry this has been such a difficult thing to process. It's always really difficult to rework an image of someone you once thought you knew. However I'd like to just put it out there - sometimes (I think the large majority of the time) news is presented in the most sensationalist way, such that nowadays I make a point of de-sensationalizing any news I read in my head. In the case of the whole Harry's memoir thing- I can sympathize with Harry as a person possibly just wanting to take back some control of the narrative for himself. Not just in the most recent events with family (that I tend to think are less horrifying than the fandom/Twitter sussex squad discusses it anyway), but in all aspects of his life. I do not at all think he's going to put his family on blast. I can easily imagine Meghan reigning that dialogue in; she has the tendency to think before she speaks that he seems to lack. And he loves his family. Similar to The Interview promos, I imagine the publishing house knew to increase the interest by implying it to be a tell all memoir. I think he's just done a lot of growing up that he didn't know he had to do over a short period of time, esp re: implicit bias/racism in the setting of media's blatant attack on someone he loves, and is disappointed by the institution's and his family's response to it. I think he's emerged a more introspective and aware human, albeit a disillusioned one. Yes it breaks my heart to think that Meghan won't get a break from the tabloids any time soon. If I were him I'd counsel him to write it & sit on it for a few yrs. But I don't want to give the media the power to destroy Meghan in my mind, and I pray she & Harry won't either. I think she'll be okay. She's a strong one, and I think he's able to draw that same link for himself and be thoughtful about what he does. No one likes being misunderstood/misinterpreted, and I wouldn't be surprised if Harry's especially triggered by that given his history with the press. Maybe this idea emerged from therapy, idk. I can empathize with that, even if I wouldn't do it myself. I hope and pray Meghan gets the support she needs from him and her loved ones in the meantime. I'm honestly not going to read it. I think the less attention I give the BRF the better off they are, unless they're doing something immoral/illegal (see: Woking pizza alibi). And I think at the end of the day, people will unfairly judge other people, especially public figures that have tragic pasts and are publically fighting with the media. A lot of it is going to be noise and I'm not going to give my energy into figuring it out. I like to think I've got a good sense of who they are as people - flawed but ultimately well meaning and earnest. I'm a huge admirer of Meghan and think Harry got really lucky with this one and I'm proud of him for choosing her in more ways than one. I believe Harry and Meghan are lovely people, and I 100% believe their interview. I believe that there are people in the palace with a lot of unchecked power who deliberately uncovered her and Archie from BRF protection for reasons of believed superiority over Meg & Arch. And they're figuring out how to deal with that as a couple and a family. And it's none of my business past that imo. I pray for them and hope it'll eventually end in peace for them all. Just wanted to add another perspective, and hopefully some levity. xx M

Hi, dear. First thing’s first, I really appreciate that this is off anon lol. I love it when people own their opinions, and it says a lot that you did. So thank you for that.

Second of all, I really appreciate the nuance and perspective that is in this message. I agree that the news is sensationalist, and my initial reaction was based off of that. I did watch the promotional clips of the interview and I believe it did sour my expectations going into it when I watched it nearly a week after it aired. I did my best to stay away from Tumblr because I didn’t want that to hinder my view, but it was impossible to separate the promotions that presented the information one way from what it actually was, and thank you for bringing that up with respect to the memoir because I hadn’t considered it. I will say that my knee jerk reaction is pretty on par with the way I still feel about it 24 hours later, especially since I got the news directly, not from Tumblr or Twitter or anywhere else, but you’re right that it could have soured my view from the very start.

I appreciate that he wants to take back some of the narrative but I think that ship has sailed, tbh. He did that with the interview and now I just think it feels like information overload. At some point, people are going to get tired of hearing the wealthy, privileged, powerful Prince complain about his life while more than 4 million people have died due to a global pandemic in less than 2 years. Not to say that he doesn’t struggle - in the words of Roxane Gay, there is no oppression Olympics (and that can be extended to struggle Olympics) - but people view it that way and will get tired of it, if they haven’t already.

I also agree that Harry’s past with the press has tarnished the way he has handled the media and the public post-exit, when he’s finally in a position to strike back without being somewhat obliged to them as part of the circumstances of his birth. I understand and sympathize with him but I just don’t think the public does, and the public matters much, much more than the perspective of one single American fan, to whom he’s never been obliged, and I simply do not think the public will afford him that same understanding, sympathy, and leniency. The public and the media are critical to his humanitarian work - his mother never realized that towards the end of her life, and I truly don’t think she would have been the martyr/saint she is perceived to be now if she had lived, because she did not know how to meet the media in the middle and eventually that started to piss people off. He’s starting to piss people off now and if it doesn’t bother him personally (which it definitely does), I don’t want it to affect his causes. The Invictus Games, Sentebale, Walking with the Wounded, WellChild, Mayhew, Smartworks, Archewell, etc. deserve better than to suffer the wrath of the media and an apathetic public because their patrons simply will not shut up lol.

I guess my point is that they will be unfairly judged (regardless, but especially due to the way they’re handling things), and I think it would suit them better in the long run if they adopted a different strategy. I really sympathize with the fact that he feels frustrated with the narrative that has been manufactured but I really, really think the narrative will only get worse and worse as he continues to go on and on about how badly his life sucks, basically. Again, I don’t deny that he struggles - we all do, some more than others, especially when there are mental health issues - but the public, to me, simply does not care. My own therapist has told me to simply stop caring about the things that I discuss with him. Not to say that they’re not relevant, important, or worthy of discussion - they absolutely are - but his point is that you cannot change people and you are wasting your energy and struggling yourself because you want to change them so, so, so badly that you’re neglecting your own self care in the process. I hate that I do it to myself and I also hate that he appears to be doing it to himself. I’m sure a lot of this conversation has been brought up in his own therapy, and I’m no professional, but I’m doing my best to heed the advice of my own therapist - which is the opposite of what Harry is doing - and it’s done wonders for me, when I actually can do it.

If there’s anything I know from this whole thing, it’s that Harry is absolutely punching above his weight, love him as I may, and that he adores, adores, adores his wife. He has chosen her from the very second she came into his life and I couldn’t want anything more for him or from her. I’m not going to lie, I would have been in this thing for any wife that Harry chose, because I was here long before Meghan specifically came into his life. However, I am glad every day that he chose her, that he loves her, that he wants to protect her, that she loves him back, that he lives the life with her that he’s wanted as long as I (and I’m sure he) can remember. I love her because he loves her, and I would have no matter what, because at the end of the day, it’s his happiness and comfort that matters to me, that has mattered to me since I discovered him and how wonderful he can be more than 7 years ago. What more could I ask of Meghan? What more, as his fan to the end (annoy me as he may), could I want for him? Who could say anything about her in that regard? If there’s anything that has come of this mess, to me, it’s that Harry loves, loves, loves his wife. I will always be happy for him and I will always be proud of him for choosing her, even if I don’t always agree with the way he goes about it.

I’m looking forward to peace, too. I cannot wait for things to just die out, for them to work things out as a couple and as a family, and for everyone to move on. The family will still do their thing and the Sussexes can do theirs, but I cannot deal with this back and forth, tit for tat, petty nonsense anymore. They’re wonderful and flawed, like the rest of them (except Andrew), and I just hope that they can all come to some kind of agreement or terms that lets this die down. It’s exhausting for everyone - themselves included. If I’m this tired, I can only imagine how tired they all are.

Thanks for stopping by, and sorry for the essay (essays, these past 24 hours lol). I really appreciate your kindness in this message, your presence in my notifications (I do see them!), your nuanced perspective and like I said before, I really, really appreciate that you own it!