#how can it be this easy to hurt and destroy those who have done you no wrong?
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aconitemare · 9 months ago
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#I just don’t understand how so many people can be so committed to hatred#why? why?#the banality of evil……just#how can it be this easy to hurt and destroy those who have done you no wrong?#sorry I’ll pull myself together because I have work to get done but#it’s so hard sometimes to reconcile this truth I know that we all deserve life and happiness#and the reality that others do not think that is truth#how do they not think what I think??#how can they stand to watch others’ pain and not ache?#and how can they hurt others themselves?#that violence and hatred is natural to many is something I’ve known since I was young#and the majority of the time I don’t question it. it is just a fact of life. like in the way I know some people can taste paprika#even though I personally can’t.#but then I see some video online of cops assaulting a woman#for standing against GENOCIDE—the most senseless and destructive and vile of acts in the world—and I am struck by how much I just#cant understand it. like there is a whole facet of humanity I cannot reach. I cannot UNDERSTAND.#and though I am glad to not be full of senseless and casual hatred I wonder if it would hurt less if I did understand it.#like. if I could AT LEAST /understand/ what makes a person capable maybe it wouldn’t be so horrifying to me. because it wouldn’t seem like#this strange alien entity or cosmic horror#I could reason with it and demystify it and not feel so scared by the fact that seemingly every other person I walk by could wipe out#a whole people. could assault a mother. could slaughter a child. and feel nothing at all#or watch it happen and feel nothing but smug glee#I can’t let my brain go too far with these thoughts. bad bad bad#messages for the void
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a-little-ray-of-fantasy · 1 year ago
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An analysis on how Sir Pentious' character design represents his personality and development perfectly (beware of Hazbin Hotel spoilers)
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Let's get this out of the way: Sir Pentious is a snake, an animal mostly known for generally believed negative traits such as poison, deceit and betrayal. We don't know WHY he's in Hell, maybe he was a "snake oil salesman" considering he comes from the Victorian times and he's into hyping up what he does, or maybe he was into war. Thing is, he's a Sinner whose design just scream "Evil".
(BTW, a snake could also represent "fertility": looking at you, Egg Boiz!)
He always had eyes all around him not just because of a stylistic choice.
Sir Pentious always felt like he was watched, and had to watch out for any danger.
"Everyone here is too nice: obviously it must be a lie! I can sense they are planning to kill me, but when?! HOW?! I must be PREPARED!"
Sadly, he's been constantly berated by other demons, far more effective in destruction, status, cruelty and charisma. Alastor won't ever bother to remember him, Cherri always ones up him, and the Vs, the ones he admires to most, won't care less about him.
To the point that Vox sent him as a spy without the intention to save him if things were going to fail. Heck, he even openly tells him to die while calling him a failure.
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So of course he's got reasons to have trust issues, or taking everything so seriously, being constantly reminded of what he can't accomplish. So he puts an air of grandure that may be very flamboyant, but is VERY frail.
But, if we have to be frank here, his biggest source of insecurities... is himself.
He has eyes on his tail (his softer, more vulnerable side, which is ironically made even MORE lieable to getting hurt because of how sensitive those organs are), and inside his hood, so he could look out better for danger when on alert mode.
Heck, even the mark on his hood kinda resembles one eye.
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Problem is, when you see his hood folded, when he's at ease, neutral or sad, those are not looking at outside sources.
They're looking at him, at his back. A constant stare that happens everytime he lets his guard down and shows how vulnerable he is. A gaze that can sense all of his weakness, his struggles, his insecurities.
And it's all him.
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Pentious constantly believes that his inferiority complex will fade away once he'll accomplish something grand that will make others accept him. But he is his biggest critic, his worst enemy: HE is the one who believes he's a failure, that he'll never gain approval from others.
This show takes place in Hell, but this is Sir Pentious' personal Hell: insecurity born out of self hatred. Doomed to feel everyone's gaze upon him, including his own. Believing the danger to his self esteem is from others, when it's really from him.
But then he's accepted at the Hazbin Hotel: Charlie forgives him, he bonds with Angel, Husk and Niffty who don't care a bit about what he's accomplished or not, or what he's done in the past.
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He feels more comfortable in showing his vulnerable side, and no one judges him for how easy it is for him to get emotional.
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Of course he's still very insecure, considering how he struggles to confess to Cherri, but notice how he stops building machines or planning to attack others as soon as he starts bonding with the others: he doesn't have a reason to destroy or attack, now that he knows he's loved.
And his final design, when he goes to Heaven, shows how much he's changed, yet stayed the same. He may have died a hero, but he's still the same awkward snake we've come to love.
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Speaking of love, let's talk about that!
No more eyes on his tail, now it's just on his chest (showing he's opened his heart), his glasses are now heart shaped, and even the markings inside his hood resemble kiss marks more than anything else.
And look: the mark on his hood is now heart shaped!
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Why all these hearts? Why did all the eyes disappeared from his body? Even his eyes that were looking at his back?
Simple: love. Love defeated his insecurities and self hatred. He died for love.
He died protecting his friends, his new family, his new home.
He confessed and kissed Cherri knowing full well he wouldn't have made it, and yet he went anyway.
The usually cowardly and timid Pentious actually faced a great danger with courage and determination: he acted selflessly by putting himself in harm's way, he didn't steal (naturally) and by going against Adam he did indeed "stick it to the man"!
He used his weaponry knowhow and battle experience not to conquer, but to save his loved ones.
His only thought up until his demise was: "I'll go down protecting them".
And he's been rewarded not only by becoming an angel, but also being spawned directly in front of Emily and Sera, two Seraphim, the highest rank for an angel to have, who have also been depicted as snakes of fire throughout history! Sir Pentious, the lowly demon considered a failure by everyone, actually has been noticed by the Seraphim! He's come so far!
He's now come to represent the REAL symbolism of a snake: the duality of death and rebirth, transformation and immortality (ironically a reference to the fact he's been around since 1888 without ever dying from any Extermination or blessed weapons).
And isn't so poetic that a snake, the "source of the original evil", was the first sinner to ascend to Heaven? Or that this episode was released on February 1st, or National Serpent Day?
And of course, as the Bible itself says:
"Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends."
(John 15:13)
And knowing him, I'm confident in saying he'll keep helping his friends even in his new position, like the soft hearted noodle he's always been, but was to afraid to show it up until now.
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jjkarmy091 · 21 days ago
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Second Best- Jungkook (part 8 )
Summary: Being friends with someone who has your heart it’s already hard, let alone when that special someone ends up falling in love with your best friend, the one you think would never make anything to hurt you . Will you be able to ignore it and move on? what will happen when everything gets too much for you to handle?
Genre: Friends to lovers; angst; body insecurities; bullying; friend betrayel;
Pairing: Jungkook x female!reader
Wordcount: 5.781
Author's note: It took me a lot but here it is. Got so many blocks writting this and I'm not satified with it. It doesn't matter how many time I write and rewrite it, it feels like it's never good enough but I tried my best so please go easy on me. Hope you like it and let me know if you want a next chapter or not. Also: I'm sorry for any mistakes
Love you loads <3
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When Y/n woke up the next morning she could swear her head was gonna fall off. It was one of those headaches it makes you wanna clung onto the bedsheets and never leave ‘till the next day. Flashbacks of the night before went through her brain but she brushed them off. She wanted to enjoy the few days she had taken, yet she’s still thinking about the same. She thought she was doing a good job but Taehyung’s words didn’t really help too, she definitely was going to face Sewoon with all these facts. Y/n always chose kindness over anything else but would all of that have gotten her anywhere? Looking back, she had serious doubts about that. 
Getting up from the bed and heading to the bathroom she notices everything is still very quiet which means Lisa is still asleep. Y/n wants to do something nice for her so she decides to make a huge breakfast once she knows that food is Lisa's undoing and starts preparing things without making too much noise (or at least trying to). Everything’s almost ready when Y/n listens to steps aproaching the kitchen/living room area as she pours some orange juice in Lisa’s cup saying good morning. Lisa looks at her and smiles, answering her back and sitting down.  
“what’s all this?”  
“It’s just a way to thank you for being such a great person to me. I know I've been hard to handle these last days but I want you to know that I truly feel grateful for everything you’ve done for me so far. If it wasn’t for you I don’t know how things would’ve ended up for me, I’d probably be crying in my room, thinking how much I suck because the guy I’m in love with doesn’t love me back” 
“I told you Y/n, it’s completely fine. I always liked you. You bring such a positive vibe and you’re so kind and fun to be around. It’s good to be around you and if I can help you somehow I will.” A few minutes of silence passed until Lisa asked what she was dying to know. “Did you talk to him?” Y/n stops suddenly, swallows hard and shakes her head.  
“No” 
“care to explain why?” 
“I’ve been thinking about your words and you’re right! I have to stop being a pussy and be real with myself and my feelings, not for others but for me. All this mess started because I'm always comparing myself to others all the time. I was so scared that Sewoon and Jungkook would meet and I was the bridge for them to start something. I allowed this. If only I wasn't so afraid and had more confidence in myself maybe it would be me in Sewoon's place and that kills me inside Lisa. For once in my life it would have been simple and sincere and I'm the only one to blame for this."
"What makes you think he was never interested in you Y/n? Because from what you told me it seemed to me that he was quite into you” 
"He definitely wasn't Lisa, you're confusing things. He found my attitude towards him funny when we first met, I don't know. But he never showed any signs, he never said anything and I was afraid of destroying the friendship we were building by saying something. He even used to go on dates. At the end he would go to the coffee shop and we would talk about it and stuff.” 
Lisa frowned “So he went on dates but never hooked up with them afterwards? a boy in his prime, with basic needs and would always come to you afterwards? You never found anything weird?” 
“For what he told me he had just gotten out of a complicated relationship. I think he was more interested in meeting new people, go out for a bit, clear his head.” 
“and come back to you in the end” Lisa mocks while Y/n throws a piece of bread at her, hitting her in the forehead. “Don’t be annoying” 
“Y/n you may not understand much about boys but I do and that's not normal for someone who don't have feelings for you. At best, he would go home.” Y/n drank some of her juice. "stop it! if that was true he wouldn't have gone straight to my supposed best friend. Why would he do that if he was interested in me?  The way he looked at her, how he said she was the best thing that ever happened to him and that he would never be able to love anyone the way he loves her. Not to mention what he did for Sewoon. She told me some things and all I could think about was how I wish it was me instead. I hoped it was me but I'm a coward, that's why I'm still here, 23 years old and a virgin. Even in that regard, Sewoon was lucky.” Y/n looks at her plate, trying to avoid eye contact with Lisa, knowing that would be enough to make her start crying but kept talking
“How she described the way he touched her, grabbed her, how he -- in short, everything. There was this one time she couldn't stop talking about how and where they did it so I invented that I was super busy and couldn't talk so she could leave and I could cry in peace. I swore never again.” 
“After everything Tae told you do you still think things are as Sewoon says?” Y/n didn’t answer, instead she got up and started taking the dishes onto the table, washing them. Lisa got up too, leaving her plate in the sink "always listen to things with a hint of doubt but specially with your heart." Y/n decided to change the subject. 
“What are we doing today?” Lisa laughed “let’s introduce you to this place the right way. See something else than snowboards” With this they got ready for the day. Lisa already knew the place with the palm of her hands so she knew what and where to go with Y/n.  
Even tho her mind was still in another place she actually found herself enjoying their time there. She enjoyed it so much that she didn't even notice the days passing by until the day for them to leave had arrived. Although the first days were complicated now she didn't mind staying another day or two but there were things to fix that she was eager to mend and she wouldn't find the so needed peace she wanted until everything was cleared up.
On their last day there Lisa suggested to go for a hot chocolate where they found Tae and his friend once again. They saw each other a lot during their staying and ended up clearing everything up and agreed that Sewoon was a NO topic. That night they went to a club all together and Y/n remembers having so much fun and getting so drunk that she ended up on top of Tae's friend. (Not the way you guys are thinking, pervs ;)
Y/n already had too much to drink and once they were stepping out of the club she tripped and Tae's friend was there and tried to hold her only for Y/n to bring him down with her. All of them laughed and they even took a picture of them both on the floor in a suspicious position. She just hoped any of it would end up on social media, at least for now because she knew either Sewoon or Jungkook would see it, but of course things never go the way she wanted them too. On their way home Y/n got a notification on instagram saying Taehyung tagged her in a photo so she opened it and saw a set of pictures, the first being Y/n, Lisa, Tae and his friend with drinks on their hands and Tae's arm around Y/n's waist and the second just a photo of Y/n and Tae making a funny face among with other random pics with the caption “Glad to see an old flame again. Loved these days with the best people. Let's repeat it next year” Fuck
She still had two days before going back to work and a few hours' journey ahead of her and the last thing she wanted was to end these wonderful days in an anxiety attack at an airport far from home because of a set of pictures.
It was a peaceful trip, they both took the opportunity to sleep and rest during the flight since when they arrived they had a lot to do. Y/n agreed to move to Lisa's house just as she had proposed. One night before going to sleep she spoke with her landlord and canceled the lease so she had little time to organize her stuff and take them to Lisa's. As soon as the plane landed they looked at each other and smiled, grabbed their things and slowly walked out of the airport where Lisa's father was waiting for them. As soon as they got into the car, Lisa said 
“I'm sad it's over but I'm happy we're getting home. I honestly love traveling but the moment I get to my space and make myself comfortable at home is always the best of all. Speaking of it, we still have to get your things. How about we go to my house, unpack, have lunch and then pack the rest of your stuff? Unless you're tired”
“I agree with you Liz, nothing feels better than the comfort of home, and yes, I was thinking the same. I still have two days before going back to work so I have to make the most of it. Right now, i just really want to eat I’m starving and I can’t function without food” They both laugh. Lisa asked her father to turn on the radio and as soon as he did, Tate mcrae's new song started to play. Needless to say they started singing with all their power until they arrived at Lisa's house. Y/n didn't remember having that much fun, not even with Sewoon and she had known her for years.  
After arriving at the place, her father said goodbye to them and left their bags at the front door so they could unpack them. They decided to order Taco Bell and while they waited for food and for the washing machine to stop, they sat down on the sofa. Y/n was looking at her phone until she heard herself say 
“I don’t know what to do” Lisa gets confused and kept her silence in order for Y/n to say something else, getting comfy on the couch. It took her a while to speak again.
“I-  we got back to reality and I can't ignore the fact that I never spoke to Jungkook again ever since that day. It's making me nervous because my mind is racing 1000 percent, I mean, imagine he no longer wants to talk to me or listen to what I have to say.. In hindsight I should have said something to him but I was so hurt. Furthermore, I received a message from Sewoon asking what the hell I was doing with Tae without telling her. Let's just say it wasn’t a very nice message. What should I do Lisa?” 
“First of all breath Y/n. Being like this won't get you anywhere. Second: I honestly think you should send a text to Jungkook, tell him that you need to talk to him and that you know that ignoring him wasn't the right choice but that there are a lot of things he doesn't know and that it's difficult to explain. Ask him to meet, preferably in a place other than your work because it will draw a lot of attention on you. You still have time to get back to work, make the most of it before - " Before Lisa finished, the washing machine was heard making its characteristic sound and Lisa apologized and said she'd be right back while Y/n continued sitting on the sofa looking stupidly at her phone. Lisa was right, she couldn’t drag this anymore.
“Hi Jungkook, how are you? I hope you’re doing well. I’m doing good. I know i probably kept you up at night, or maybe you didn’t even think of me but still I’m writting this to give you some heads up on why I disappeared the way I did. Truth is, I had a lot going on these last few months and I know that’s not an excuse and I was on the wrong for not replying to your texts but honestly I didn’t know what else to do. I was in a real mess. I still am and the way I thought it was possible to get out of this chaos inside my mind was to escape my reality and move away. I'm sorry, I know I should have said something but I'm ready to explain everything to you now, if you still want to.  
I love you.” 
During the rest of the day Lisa helped Y/n move her things to her new place. The fact that she didn’t have a lot of things made it easier. After that, they went grocery shopping and ended up passing by Y/n’s work and decided to walk in being greeted for her co-worker Sana 
“Ohh well well well. Who do we have here? Good evening lady and welcome back! thought you’d never show your face around here again. I already miss you, how are you doing? And most importantly, when will you return? I'm so tired of putting up with the boss alone, everyday he gets more and more annoying” She says making Y/n and Lisa laugh. 
“It’s been wonderful having some days to actually rest, sad to see it end” Yn says with a smile. “How’s it going around here?” 
“Pretty much the same you know. Had your really hot friend coming over everyday at the same hour he used to come. I guess he didn’t believe me when I told him you took some days off. Weird you didn’t, you guys were so close and were together all the time I thought you’d end up together after he broke things off with Sewoon. The last time I saw him was two days ago with her actually. They came here together.” Y/n’s heart stopped for a second and she had a hard time breathing all of a sudden 
“Together how?”  
“Like I said they came in here together, sat at that table over there and chatted for a while. It was a very busy shift and I was alone here so I couldn’t see or hear a lot. When it calmed down I looked at them, Jungkook was holding her hand and saying something to her while she looked like she was crying or about to. Then I couldn't understand anything else because several customers came in at the same time. When I noticed, he was already coming to pay and Sewoon was at the entrance waiting for him. That day he didn't say anything, he looked somewhere behind me but didn't speak, he just smiled, paid and left but I couldn’t see if he went alone or with her. I’m sorry”  
Of course this was going to happen, all she had to do was disappear for a few days and they wouldn't waste time getting on top of each other. She was so stupid. Was she really worthless? Lisa looked at her worriedly but didn't say anything, simply ordered two drinks while Y/n thanked her and looked out the window. If she had known, she would have enjoyed the trip even more without thinking about those two. She felt bad about leaving Jungkook in a vacuum and he was very much entertained. She always had a tiny bit of hope but what for? Sana had left to prepare their order when Lisa spoke 
“Don't pay attention to it Y/n. It could be many things, you don't know. If he really was with her why was he always coming over and asking about you?” 
“Because that’s what friends are supposed to do Lisa! They worry about each other, which makes sense given how I left the club that night and the fact that I didn't say anything to him in the following days made him think that something bad had happened to me. Everything friendship based.. Maybe that's why he didn't answer me, because he's with her. Sewoon must have shown him the photos we took with Tae on vacation. He was sure I was okay so he moved on with her, again.  
Lisa didn't have the chance to say anything because their order was given to them and they said goodbye to Sana and made their way to the car. Lisa started driving and to get home they had to pass by Y/n's old house. As they approached the road Y/n saw someone she knew very well, Sewoon and next to her was Jungkook in front of her old appartment. As if they could see her, Y/n leaned as far back as she could against the seat.  
""Lisa, for all that is most sacred to you, please don't stop here, don't look, don't do anything other than move as quickly as possible. Don’t ask me anything just go!" 
Always the second, never the chosen, as always. 
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As they get to their now shared apartment Y/n tells Lisa that she's not hungry and if she doesn't mind she's going to rest because it was a very long day and that tomorrow is the last day and she wants to take the opportunity to organize the rest of her things and relax. Lisa says she doesn't mind at all, that she also feels the same and is going to rest, specially because the next day she has a last minute meeting.
Y/n tried to make Lisa not notice it but she's not stupid. As she drove past Y/n's old building she saw the silhouettes that bothered her so much and all she had to do was put two and two together upon seeing her reaction. The only thing she wanted was to park and give Sewoon a good slap and tell her everything she had been holding back so far.  
After getting home both went to their rooms. Y/n couldn’t get any sleep. She tossed and turned but sleep was far away.  Y/n looked at her phone and still no text or call from Jungkook. Why was she stupid and sent him a text? Clearly he wasn't worried at all, not even an "ok" he had responded. Suddenly she felt her eyes blurry and that was when she realized the tears rolling down her cheeks. She thought she was worth more, even if it was just in terms of friendship. After some time lost in her own thoughts, she decided to put on her headphones and try to get some sleep and managed to do so after a few hours. 
The next day, when she woke up it felt like she had been hit by a bus. Lisa had also gone out to deal with some matters at work, at least she remembered mentioning something about it. Once alone, Y/n had decided to stay in bed. Honestly she wasn't in the mood to do anything else and wanted to take to relax since she was going back to work the next day. Willingness? none. It was going to be hard but the way things were going neither Jungkook nor Sewoon were going to show up there or so she thought.
The next day her alarm went off and Y/n got ready for the day. She was going to do a double shift today since Sana was off, so she was on her own. For some reason she was nervous, it seemed like it was her first day again so her anxiety was on the roof. 
As incredible as it may seem, as soon as she arrived she saw her regular customers greeting her and telling her how much they missed her (most of them elderly people who used to frequent the shop even before she worked there and who had loved her since her first day) relaxed her immediately. Everything went very well. During her break Lisa went to see her and they chatted and drank coffee before going back to do the other part of the shift. Until then, everything was going perfectly. No sign of people she didn't want to see, she hadn't had any rude customers and her boss was in a very good mood. It was all too good to be true since luck is not something that goes on her side. 
Y/n was getting ready to close the shop and at that point she was usually alone. She was putting the chairs on the table when she heard the entrance bell signal that someone else was there with her. When she turned to inform the customer that they were closed, she came across someone she didn't want or even expeected to see.
In front of her was Jungkook with wet hair and helmet in hand. He seemed agitated, confused and angry. Very angry. Y/n couldn't help but notice the dark circles under his eyes as if he hadn't slept in days. She stopped on the spot, what would she say or do? They hadn't seen or spoken to each other for almost a week and the atmosphere was tense and she just wanted to disappear. 
He looked at her with such an intense gaze that she had to turn away while saying "we are closed" and pretended to keep doing what she was doing. 
"Really? After days of complete silence while i was worried sick about you. After leaving without any kind of warning? After that stupid fight on the club and sudden departure with someone that neither Sewoon nor I knew, that's all you have to tell me? we are closed? Are you for real?” 
Y/n stopped doing what she was doing but kept her back to him. It’s a good thing he couldn't see her because her hands were like jelly, shaking so much that she thought she was going to faint right there, however continued to act tough and ignored him, took a deep breath and started walking to the counter until she felt a hand grab her arm.  
“Y/n please stop shitting me. I’ve been going crazy these last few days because of you and you act like you don't care. I don't know what's worse, your attitude or the fact that I don't recognize you at all" and with these words Y/n turned around and looked at him with tears threatening to fall. She released herself from Jungkook's hand and turned completely towards him. She was on the verge of bursting. 
“You. Out of all people YOU are the only one who can't say that. I did everything for you Jungkook. I was always there for you when you needed me, remember? I knew when you were good, when you were sad, when it wasn't the best time to talk and when you wanted to say something but didn't know how. You needed me and I was there but when it was the other way around, were you there for me? Did you care at all?” she sighed “All this because I didn't answer to some calls and texts from you? You were so worried about me that you were always tied to Sewoon, don't tell me you were also worried about me when you were inside her. Be honest Jungkook, you only remembered me when it suited you. Admit it, when it comes to me you don't think twice." 
Jungkook didn't say anything, he looked at her as if she had just stuck a knife into him. He expected everything but this version of Y/n. He had noticed for some time she was different but he never asked her because he didn't want to bring up the subject that was bothering her hoping she’d be the one to open up to him yet it seems like it was a bad decision to wait. Maybe he should have talked to her when he noticed it, he knows he was stupid but he wasn't going to give in now. He was about to speak again when Y/n continued her speech.
“Things weren't supposed to be like this but everything is already ruined so what I'm about to say won't make a difference and honestly I'm tired of staying silent so as not to hurt other people and try to please them. That's why I'm in this shit right now, so here it goes.” Y/n looks him straight in the eyes and more tears run down her face, it's now or never. 
“I’m in love with you Jungkook”
As soon as the words left her mouth, a sob came out as well. This is where it ends and she knows it. His expression changed from angry to pure shock. She knew him very well, but at this moment she couldn't read his thoughts, everything was so confusing, he seemed so confused and she didn't understand why. She was breaking and to avoid even more suffering said
“Please let's not talk about this anymore. Things are pretty obvious and we don't need to drag this out any further. I need to close this Jungkook, I'm tired and I need--" 
“How long Y/n? How long have you felt this way?” Jungkook's look was anything but disappointed. It was a look she couldn't decipher and she also didn't know if she wanted to. Y/n looked down and replied 
“ A few months after we met and started hanging out more” Jungkook turned around and placed his elbows on the counter and his hands resting on his head.  
“And you never thought to tell me? Don't you think that would be a good thing to do?” he sounded so mad. “All this time you had feelings for me and you never said anything, never showed any signs and now I'm the bad guy for moving on with my life? And why you’re talking about Sewoon? We broke things off a long time ago and you know it. You were there!” 
“Ohh please Jungkook, anything but that. I'm not blaming you for anything, in fact, I even supported you, remember ? it was ME who introduced you to Sewoon  because YOU wanted me to! Even if I told you earlier what would change? Every time you came to me it was either because you just had a dinner date or someone had asked for your number. You love to say I'm always on your mind, I guess that I wasn’t on it those nights. I'm just the girl you would share things with and ask for advice, you don't have to be very smart to see that.” 
“Is that why you left without saying anything?” Y/n looked at him and when he saw that he wasn't getting a response, he went to her and got so close that she could see all the moles on his face, some that she hadn't even realized he had.  
“Y/n answer me. It's the least I deserve.” Even though there was some distance between them, Y/n felt trapped so she decided to move away a little, hitting her back on the counter. 
“Yes. After our conversation at the club and the way I saw you look at Sewoon I realized that there was no chance for me, not that I didn't already know, but I got the confirmation that day and the way you were more interested in going to her than hearing me confirmed my guesses once again, yet it was when you went to her and you kissed in the middle of all those people that my heart was left in pieces. I looked at you and instead of being happy that my best friend was back with the girl he's in love with, I just wished it was me in her place. I had to get out of there before everyone saw me break." Y/n cleaned some tears that were running down
"In Sewoon's eyes I'm already pathetic, but in yours? I preferred to die than to know you had that image of me. I went to the bathroom and that's when I met a friend from school, we ended up talking and exchanging contacts. She asked me if I wanted a ride and I took the opportunity to leave, that's when you found me. That night I spent at her house and she made me an offer and invited me to go traveling with her. For my mental health I accepted and only God knows what it cost me not to have said anything to you and I'm really sorry for that, I know it wasn't the right thing to do, but Jungkook you didn't care either because when I texted you back you never answered me. You can't judge my actions after having done the same thing.”
“You could never be pathetic y/n. I've always said how much I admire the way you are and I keep praising that, I would never get that impression of you. I know you went on a trip with Lisa and two other boys, Sewoon had shown me pictures of you, that's why I don't understand Y/n, none of this adds up. And I never received any text from you because unlike you, every day I checked if you had come to work, if you sent anything or if Sewoon knew anything about you. That's the reason I was with Sewoon a lot more these last few days. It's sad that I only found out that you were back because I saw your friend here yesterday, I recognized her from those photos, so I went to her and asked her about you. She told me you were coming back to work today and to show up around this time because you'd be alone. I was crazy looking for you, wondering if you were in a dead end, that's when Sewoon called me saying you were okay, hanging with some guys you probably met there. She also sent me the pictures, that's when I calmed down.”
Y/n didn't know which part made her more shocked, if the fact that Lisa spoke to Jungkook or knowing Sewoon sent the photos to him and omitted the fact that they both know the boy in question.
"Oh my god. After all this time Sewoon is still keeping you in the dark. Well just so you know the guy who posted the pictures is Sewoons ex-boyfriend, the one she left you for. Remember when she broke up with you? Yeah it was because of him. There are definitely things you should clarify with her, as she changes everything that corresponds to reality. Things that don't concern me at all and to be honest I'm tired of this conversation, it doesn't matter anymore. Things happened and it's ove, so if you don't mind it was a complicated day --” She didn't expect Jungkook to get so close to her but the truth is that they were centimeters away from each other and that was making her even more nervous and uncomfortable. She tried to get around him but he put his arms on either side of Y/n's body, trapping her there.  
"Did it work? Did you forget about me there? Did any of those guys help you forget me?”  Y/n had no response, she was completely surrendered to looking between his eyes and lips. She wasn't brave enough to grab him and kiss him, specially since he was still fooling around with Sewoon or so she thought, even tho the denied it. Still she wouldn't feel good doing that even if Sewoon hadn't been the best friend, so she did what she does best, avoided the interaction.  
“"I had fun and regardless of things I don't owe you any kind of explanation. I finally learned my lesson and you're not the exception, Jungkook. You're the rule and I don't give second chances to get me hurt, not even to you. I don't want to continue in this agony every time I see you and ask myself why others and not me? It took me a long time to get there but I finally managed to understand that as long as I don't like and accept myself as I am, neither will others and for that reason I ask you not to come here again. This is a closed subject and one that I want to bury.”  
“We’re not done having this conversation Y/n, I have to tell you some-”  
“Yes we are Jungkook, don’t you get it? I just told you I’m in love with you. My best friend who’s in love with my other best friend, who's still into her ex boyfriend. Did you even hear what I said about Sewoon?"
" I don't care about Sewoon,Y/n. Don't you fucking get it? All this time the only person on my mind was you. I tried really hard not to call you because why would I need to know where you were or who you were with. In your eyes I dated your best friend but in my eyes the only thing that connected me to her was you."
"Lisa has been fixing something she didn’t break because of how weak I was to stand for myself. I’m tired of being this innocent and naive girl everyone can step on. I'm not blaming you Jungkook, you didn't know and things turned out this way and it's okay. It's over and I think it's the best for you and me. I’ll be here if you need something but right now I don’t want to be around you. I need to fix myself before being there for you or Sewoon again and if you really care about me you’ll respect that” 
“Y/n, you're not understanding I--"
“Please Jungkook, just go. Let me do this for me and maybe we can talk about this in the future and laugh about it.” He didn't say anything else, he swallowed hard, shook his head, picked up his helmet and left, slamming the door loudly and that's when y/n collapsed. 
"I love you Jungkook. I love you so much but I can't be your second option." Y/n said as she slid down the wall, succumbing to the pain of something she never had.
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tags: @esposadomd @joonlover1207 @eegyo @furrywonderlandwolf @minghaosimp @differentrunawayperson @nikkinikj @jksusawife @jk97bam @cryingoverpixelsetc @bhonbhon @lostinneocity @almostpurplelady @meowforluv @imagine-this-motherfucker @jk-190811 @cryingoverpixelsetc @11thenightwemet11 @rinkud @ayatie97 @jk-190811 @shaku1995
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scripts4dreamers · 1 month ago
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Me and my one (1) friend who has also had their brain corrupted by the blight (dragon age) have been fighting about this for two days but I’m so sure I’m right, so I humbly present my thesis to you lovely people.
1. After the events of the Veilguard, if Rook and Neve ended up together, Neve tries to leave you.
LET ME EXPLAIN! (Spoilers for the Veilguard ending)
I love Neve. She’s my favorite romance from Veilguard, she’s an incredible character and she does not deserve all the hate she gets. Having said that, she does 1000% try and leave Rook.
The one thing we know about Neve, almost from the moment we meet her, is that she is not a believer. She doesn’t believe Solas is a god, at first, she doesn’t believe anyone will have her back, she doesn’t believe Minrathous will improve and she doesn’t believe she’s going to survive this job. But still she fights on, not out of a genuine belief that she can win, but because she has a soft spot for lost causes.
Neve has devoted her life to being the champion of lost causes. She tells Rook that, even if this job doesn’t get her, one of them will. She risks her life, day in and day out, in service of a city that has done nothing but hurt her. Neve believes she’s a dead woman walking, and all she wants to do is go down protecting the people of Dock Town because someone has to. Someone has to.
And then she meets Rook and Harding and now gods are real, and they’re destroying the world and oh well everything was always going to go down in flames, so why not help out? She’s always been a magnet for bad news, for bad luck, for the worst of humanity, so why not spend her last days fighting for what little good is left?
She tries to fight falling for Rook, but they’re everything she wishes the world could be. They’re the lifeline she’s been waiting for since before the world forced her to stop believing. They’re good and kind and full of life and how can she do anything but love them for that? But she’s already dead, they’re both already dead and she can’t survive another loss.
She throws herself into loving them only after she lost them to the Fade. Only after Harding/Davrin died. After her world already ended, because that’s when she really realizes how quickly it can all end and how much time she wasted pushing people away. The goddamn WORLD IS ENDING and the person you love is THERE and they’re REAL and they WANT YOU, so why not? What is there to lose? It’s easy to love someone when the world is ending. It’s easy to love someone when you’re both already doomed.
But then the world doesn’t end. The sun rises on a blighted Minrathous and they’re both still alive, and now she’s faced with rebuilding. There’s so much work to be done, she’s a bloody, scarred mess and the job she was brought in for is over, isn’t it? She’s not a cool noir detective who died saving the world anymore, she’s someone’s partner, someone’s friend and lover and those aren’t jobs she had ever prepared herself to take.
Suddenly, without the haze of panic and the urgency of stopping the gods, things look different. She needs a new apartment. Minrathous needs a detective. Life goes back to normal and Neve still isn’t a believer.
Of course, everyone says they’ll stay in touch. Bonds formed that can never be broken and all that, but Neve knows better. You don’t hang around once the party is over. You don’t give the world more ways to hurt you, more people to take. You don’t give people a chance to leave you.
So she leaves first.
She regrets it. She hates herself for it. She cries herself to sleep wondering how she could be such a coward, but she leaves. She packs a bag, writes a goodbye letter and leaves before morning.
Now, do I think her and Rook get back together? Absolutely I do. I just think that, with all the events of Veilguard happening in such a short time, there’s going to be some major questions for all the companions once the dust settles, and leaving before you can be left is Neve Gallus’ answer to those questions.
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andvys · 1 year ago
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I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss | part 5
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Warnings: angst, hurt/no comfort, mentions of cheating, heartbreak, lots of angst
Pairings: Steve Harrington x fem!cheerleader!reader , Steve Harrington x Nancy Wheeler
Summary: Everything comes crashing down on you and Steve.
Word count: 3.3k
A/N: @wroteclassicaly thank you for the angsty suggestion, I put it to good use hehe
series masterlist
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You have been through so much pain in the past couple of weeks, heartbreak and sadness. Sadness that you have turned into anger because you would rather deal with that than with anything else that heartbreaks brings you. It was easy to pretend not to care about him any longer when you have settled for the anger that he brought to you.
You finally put those rose colored glasses down and saw him for who he really was all along. He was by no means a good boyfriend or a good guy for that matter, he hurt you and then he did the worst thing that he could ever do to you – he cheated on you. That was one thing that you have been so deeply afraid of. That was the only thing you had asked him not to do but he did it anyway. He kissed another girl, he would’ve done much more if she let him, you know it, you know him. And in the end he left you for her. 
He made you feel like your whole relationship was a lie, that the love he felt for you was never real. That you never mattered to him.
Weeks of self doubt, questions and what if’s haunted you. Crying yourself to sleep or drowning yourself in things that aren’t good for you have become your reality in the past few weeks. You were suffering but you wouldn’t let anyone see. You’ve put on an armor and found out that you should’ve done that a long time ago, it protected you from him and the things he still made you feel. 
You found peace in knowing that this was over, that no matter how much you love him, you could still let him go. 
You let him go. 
The walls have moved up higher and higher around you, despite the pain deep in your bones, you have started to feel stronger again. It took you weeks to get there. And it only took him a minute to strip you of the armor, to destroy the walls that you have struggled to build up. He took away all your power, all your strength with just a simple touch. 
The moment you feel his lips on yours, you push him away before it can fully turn into a kiss. A cold wave washes over you, your heart begins to pound faster than it did before. You feel so many things at once, shock, confusion, longing, sadness and anger. 
“What the hell, Steve?” 
He blinks and the softness in his eyes begins to fade away. His lips part and he frowns a little as he stares down at you. He takes in the angry look on your face – the tears in your eyes that he hasn’t seen in a long time.
“Get off of me!” 
Realization rushes through him, a shiver runs down his spine and the feeling of guilt and regret starts to take over. He moves away instantly. He sits back on your bed and runs his hand through his hair, not looking away from you. You scoot away from him and get off the bed, tucking your hair behind your ears, you cup your cheeks as you begin to pace around your room. 
“S-Shit, y/n. I’m sorry.” What exactly is he sorry for? For wanting to kiss you? For feeling like it was the right thing to do? 
“Y-You’re sorry?” You laugh, turning your back to him, you stare at the ground in disbelief. 
He is sorry, he is sorry for trying to kiss you the way he kissed her when he was still yours. 
You try to fight the tears but you can’t, right now, there is no fight left in you. 
Steve stares at you. His heart is pounding in his chest, dread begins to take over. Why did he do that? He gets up and walks towards you, he hesitates when he hears your quiet sniffle. He places his hand on your shoulder, instantly regretting it when you flinch at his touch. You turn around to face him. Your glassy eyes meet his, his breath gets caught in his throat. 
The last time he saw you like this was the morning after the Halloween party. Back then, his own feelings confused him, he didn’t know what he was feeling when he broke your heart. Now he realizes that what he was feeling, what he is feeling right now is sadness. 
“D-Don’t touch me, Steve!” 
Your words are out of anger but your voice is shaky and filled with sadness. 
“I-I’m sorry, y/n. I-I didn’t mean to upset you–”
“Why did you do that?” You ask. You step towards him. “W-Why did you try to kiss me?” 
He blinks and stares at you for the longest time. The room is silent, the energy is heavy. 
“It felt right,” he says without thinking. 
A laugh of disbelief falls from your lips, you shake your head. 
“Just how it felt right to kiss her when you were still with me?” You finally ask. 
He furrows his brows, his eyes flash with confusion. Shaking his head, he steps closer to you, “w-what?” He asks. 
If you weren’t so agitated right now, you would see the genuine confused look on his face. 
“Nancy!” You say. “You kissed Nancy a-and don’t even try to deny it, Steve! Billy told me that he saw you kissing her in your car!” 
Steve feels a little defeated when he realizes what you are talking about. He doesn’t even blame you for believing Billy. Steve had met up with Nancy at Benny’s Burgers to work on the group project, when they went back into his car later that night, she kissed him – he didn’t kiss her back, in fact, he was frozen in place when he felt her foreign lips moving against his. Steve had pushed her away when he realized what was happening. Billy must’ve seen them at a bad moment and of course he had to tell you. 
He closes his eyes for a moment, he pinches the bridge of his nose. He knows that whatever he will say won’t get you to calm down. You won’t believe him and he doesn’t blame you. 
“I didn’t kiss her, y/n. I swear to god, I didn’t.” 
This whole thing – this conversation is ridiculous, how he is standing in front of you, trying to make you believe that he didn’t kiss his girlfriend. 
“She kissed me, I pushed her away – I would’ve never done this to you.” 
“You – what?!” You scoff, shaking your head, “you would’ve never done this to me?” You ask and point to yourself, a look of disbelief crosses your face as you stare at him. He broke your heart, he told you he never loved you, he fell in love with her while he was still with you, he dumped you and now he is claiming that he would have never done this to you? 
You never wanted this to happen, you never wanted to show him how hurt you still are, you never wanted him to know that he still has so much power over you, you never wanted him to see how much you still love him. 
The anger and the heartbreak takes over you and you lose the control that you have had all these weeks. 
Why did he have to do this to you? 
“Y-You left me, Steve! You left me for her! You fell in love with her while you were with me a-and now you wanna tell me that you wouldn’t have done this to me? Y-You did so much worse, Steve!” 
Steve feels his heart dropping to his stomach. The tears that roll down your cheeks, the heartbroken look on your face and the pain in your voice makes him feel like he has finally crashed back into reality. These past few weeks have been a blur, it felt like he was in a constant state of haziness, like he wasn’t himself, like he wasn’t there. 
But now he is here and the realization of what he has done to you finally comes rushing in. 
“You said you never loved me, o-our whole relationship was a fucking lie a-and I knew it! I always knew it, you treated me like shit! You stood me up, you talked to other girls, y-you could be so fucking mean to me and I still stayed b-because I loved you – I loved you so much, Steve.” Your voice cracks and you have to take a deep breath. You don’t even see him clearly, your eyes are blurred with tears. “I-I hoped you loved me too because you were still with me, despite everything b-but then she came along a-and then everything got so much worse and I realized, you were never actually with me. You put a label on us but you never took it seriously. You took everything from me but you never gave me anything in return! I was yours but you were never mine.” 
Steve’s face becomes etched with sadness. He can’t remember what it feels like to have tears welling up in his eyes but he gets reminded again when he feels them, when his vision blurs the longer he stares at you and realizes how much pain he had caused you – how much he regrets hurting you. 
Your eyes are filled with betrayal and heartbreak. After all this time, you are still hurting, maybe even more so than you did when he left you. He remembers the shock on your face when he told you that he is not in love with you anymore or when he told you that he was never in love with you in the first place. What a lie. He always loved you, he never stopped loving you. 
“I-I’m so sorry.” Is all he manages to say. He doesn’t recognize his own voice, it’s shaky and filled with grief.
“Y-You’re sorry?” You whisper as you tilt your head. A single tear rolls down his cheek, the sadness in his features makes you angry. 
He takes a step towards you, close enough to reach out to touch you but you slap his hands away, “don’t touch me, Steve!” You snap at him as you place your hands on his chest and push him away from you. 
“Y/n, please – I-I lied to you, I loved you, I love you!”
For some reason, your heart breaks even more at his words. You stare at him, hoping to find the lies in his eyes but the worst part is, you can’t. You can’t find it – he is telling the truth and somehow that makes it all worse. He loved you, he loves you and that wasn’t enough. The one thing that matters the most in a relationship wasn’t enough for him. His heart chose you but he didn’t want you. 
You raise your shaky hand up to your face and wipe the fallen tears but the moment a sob breaks free, you begin to cry harder. Your chest aches more than it ever did. 
This is all you wanted, for him to love you but now you wish he never did. To know that someone loved you and still chose to break your heart and leave you for someone else hurts more than to find out that you were never loved in the first place, at least that would have made sense. 
Steve watches you, his bottom lip is quivering, his heart is beating wildly in his chest, tears roll down his cheeks. He regrets it all. He wants to pull you into his arms and comfort you but how can he do that when he was the one who put you into this place of pain and suffering? 
It feels like he has just woken up only to find himself in a nightmare. What has he done? He did the worst thing that he could do to you. Your quiet sobs break his heart. He did this to you. 
“I hate you,” you whisper through the tears, “I hate you so much. I hate that I love you.”
He feels like the worst person alive. He feels miserable. 
“Y/n–”
You keep wiping your tears away, as though it will help. You shake your head. Your eyes meet his glassy ones. 
“Why are you crying?” You ask, angrily.
His shoulders slump as he takes a step towards you, “p-please forgive me, I never wanted to hurt you–”
“Fuck you!” You cry, “that’s bullshit, Steve! Everything you do, everything you say is bullshit! Y-You’re bullshit!” You place your hands back on his chest and try to shove him out of your room and he lets you, he doesn’t fight back. 
Your words cut him deeply. His throat thickens and feels like he is about to break down in front of you. 
He whispers your name when you stop pushing him. He takes hold of your wrists and for a moment, you let him. 
His hazel eyes are filled with pain, regret and sadness. He is crying and even through the hazy anger, you realize that you have never seen him cry before, not in all those years you have known him. It hurts to see him like that – after all, you still love him. 
“I regret you, Steve,” you whisper, not looking away from his eyes, “I regret you all the time.” 
“What?” 
“If I could turn back time, I would’ve never fallen in love with you, I would’ve never given you my heart, I would’ve never slept with you.”
He shakes his head, more tears brim his eyes. 
“I want you to leave me alone – I want you to forget that I exist. You got what you wanted, you got her, the girl you love. Now get out of my life and don’t fucking look back, I want nothing to do with you.” 
Your words may come from anger but he will never know how much it hurts you to say them.
“No..”
“You did this. You wanted this, remember? You threw me away, you threw us away.”
He holds your wrists tighter as though it will get you back. He shakes his head, “please..”
“You’ve done enough, asshole. Now get out of my life, I don’t want to see you, I don’t want to talk to you, I don’t want anything to do with you,” you spit, ignoring the tears that stream down yours and his face. “Just leave, I’m done with you.” You say and finally rip your hands free. 
Steve feels like falling to his knees and begging for forgiveness but the damage is done. He ruined everything. He ruined the only real thing in his life. He ripped open your wounds that have just begun to heal. 
He looks into your eyes and finally everything begins to make sense. Why he can’t get you out of his head. Why it feels so wrong to be with her. Why he thinks of you when she lies beside him. He is in love with you, he always was, he just didn’t understand it. You have always been there, you have always been the one. 
But he broke you, he broke what you two had. He did this. And he only sees it now. There is no apologizing for what he did. There is no making up for it. It’s too late for it all. 
There is love in your eyes but there is also something that tells him that it’s all over. You have let go of him a while ago, you draw the line that can’t be crossed anymore. Whatever he will do, won’t be enough to get you back. 
It’s over. 
You still love him and the look in your eyes tells him that you always will but that doesn’t mean that he will ever get a chance again. You closed the door, you locked it and destroyed the keys. There is no way back for him. 
He can see that you are barely holding yourself together, you are shaking, your bottom lip is trembling and the tears continue to roll down your cheeks. The urge to pull you into his arms and comfort you in a way he never has before is so strong but he knows that he will only make things worse if he tries to touch you again. 
He lifts his hand towards his face and wipes away the tears that you would have kissed away if things were different. Your heart jumps in your chest when you notice the hair tie around his wrist, it belonged to you. 
“I’m sorry, dolly.” He whispers softly, using the nickname he used to call you when you were children. He turns away from you and unlike the last time, it hurts. Because back then, he never truly walked away from you, he left his heart with you, he never took it away, you always had it. He never truly knew how deeply in love with you he was but now he knows, now that he has to walk away from you. 
And he doesn’t know how much it hurts you to see him walk away again. Despite the anger inside of you, it hurts you more than it did last time. 
You slam your door shut and place your palms against it. You close your eyes and try to take deep breaths. Don’t cry, just stop, stop crying. You don’t listen to the voices in your head, you don’t bother to. You are so sick of it, of crying but you can’t even stop yourself from breaking down again. 
You have let go of him, you have come to peace knowing that he never loved you. Why did he have to do this? 
You turn off the lights and walk towards your window nook, you sit down and make the mistake of looking down into your driveway. He is still here. Standing by his car and looking down at the ground. 
Your heart longs for him. 
His heart longs for you. 
But everything is too late now. 
Steve had never felt heartbreak before, this is the first time and he knows there is no one to blame but himself. He ruined the best thing that he had. 
He can’t fight the tears away, he can’t stop himself from crying. Not on the drive home and not when he walks into his house. He drags himself upstairs and the moment he takes a seat on his bed, he breaks down and he hates himself for it, he hates himself for feeling so sad and broken knowing that it was him who did all of this. 
He never felt that tight feeling in his chest, the emptiness inside of him that begins to eat at him as he sobs into his hands when he thinks about you, about what he had let go off. What he had ruined. What he had lost. 
It’s not just his pain that is making him cry, it’s also the regret and the guilt of hurting you. 
When he left you, he kept thinking about the tears in your eyes, the shocked and hurt look on your face when he told you that he never loved you, it made his chest hurt but he distracted himself with other things so he wouldn’t think about it, but now it all hits him. He will never forget the look on your face, the tears of heartbreak and anger. The thought of what he had done to you. 
Your words cut deep but he knows he deserved it. 
He deserves so much worse. 
While you regret him – he regrets her. He regrets everything. 
The next day at school both of your seats stay empty. 
next chapter
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This was a bit of a short chapter but I feel like it was the right moment to wrap it up.
@wroteclassicaly @corrodedseraphine @corrodedcorpses @mysticmunson @screammunson @imjuststeddietrashatthispoint @sherrylyn628 @somethingvicked @nemesis729 @taintedcigs @hellfire--cult @take-everything-you-can
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ooooo-mcyt · 9 days ago
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The cow incident in Limited Life drives me insane.
Joel comes out of Double Life and he immediately doesn't know how to cope with it. He'd been painfully alone, in Third Life and Last Life, something he recognized and lamented multiple times. Every alliance he made was temporary. He was always forced onto the offensive, always forced to play it risky, always forced to rely only on himself. Then Double Life happens and for once Joel can go to sleep knowing he'll still have a partner he can trust in the morning. That never happened before, and he doesn't know how to handle it ending.
The first time Joel sees Etho in Limited Life, Etho has a new thing going for him. Allies- so fast?- and a plan. That's how this game works, of course, Etho's been through this twice before. But for Joel, who never had a partner to lose in the first place, feeling like a stranger to Etho felt. Bad. It felt like abandonment. Betrayal. "I can't believe you replaced me with a cow!"
So Joel kills the cow, and the next one for good measure. He has to. Joel feels stupid and lonely and discombobulated, and he hates the helplessness of it, hates feeling weak. So Joel proves he's not any of those things, that he's as ruthless as he was in Last Life. Etho clearly moved on, after all, Joel wasn't going to be the sentimental one.
Meanwhile from Etho's perspective, he hasn't done anything to Joel. All Etho did was find a new team, because it's a constant rule across the series that previous seasons don't matter (well, they do matter, they matter so much, but they aren't supposed to, and the players honor that as much as they can, for the most part). Etho can't be expected to immediately rush back to Joel and beg to be a team again. That would be- unprecedented, and frankly, pathetic. So Etho plays the game like normal. And then Joel kills his cows.
Etho has no reason to think it was retribution for anything- it just feels malicious. Like Joel was going out of his way to target the things Etho values and destroy them, possibly just to show how little their previous connection mattered to him. So of course Etho was upset, and of course Etho held onto it, couldn't let it go, because life moves on, and seasons change, but feelings don't, and to Etho, Joel killing that cow was such a betrayal of those feelings.
Of course, things have cooled down, since Limited Life. But neither of them have ever been good at talking about how they feel, and the rift never closed fully. Because to both of them, the other person made the choice to cut off the lingering ties between them very early after Double Life ended, and that's not a gap that's easy to bridge if you feel like it'll just get you hurt.
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hotdaemondtargaryen · 6 months ago
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EWAN MITCHELL INTERVIEWED BY THE INVERSE MAGAZINE.
HOW HAS AEMOND CHANGED OVER SEASON TWO?
"For the first four episodes, you see Aemond operating from the peripheries."
"You see him and Criston Cole during their Shadow Council scenes trying to manipulate the Council table to the way they want to run things."
"Aemond is waiting for his moment to strike."
"At the end of Episode 4 — at the Battle of Rook’s Rest — he seizes his opportunity to take two dragons out with one stone."
"It's only until the “Red Sowing” in Episode 7, where Rhaenyra enlists and raises new dragon riders, that Aemond’s power is threatened."
"You're going to see a more desperate side to Aemond."
"And a desperate Aemond is a dangerous one because he might overcompensate."
"He might be a little more irrational than the composed stoic face that he's had before."
"In Episode 8, he's outgunned and he's outraged."
"The Blacks have seven dragons, the Greens have three."
"We have Vhagar, we have Dreamfyre, and we have Daeron’s dragon Tessarion, who's just taken wing."
"Aemond very much wants to win the war."
DO YOU CONSIDER AEMOND THE VILLAIN OF HOUSE OF THE DRAGON?
"It's very easy to make that assumption and judgment just because of the way that he looks."
"His Targaryen blacks, the long hair, the eye patch — it screams villain, but it depends on what side you're on."
"He's the guy who is prepared to do the necessary evil."
"He wants to be seen as a war hero."
"He knows he can be loved, but he knows he can achieve more if he's willing to be feared."
"He's done a lot of bad stuff to support the theory that he is the villain of the show."
"That's one of the most satisfying things for me is decoding his DNA and discovering that he isn't just that two-dimensional villain."
CAN YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT ABOUT THE BATTLE OF ROOK'S REST? WERE AEMOND'S ACTIONS PURPOSEFUL? WAS THAT COLLATERAL DAMAGE OR DID HE JUST TAKE AN OPPORTUNITY TO SEIZE THE POWER?
"I think it could be all three of those things."
"It could be that Aemond did, in fact, see an opportunity to take two dragons off the board with one stone, or was Aegon just in the way?"
"Aegon was never part of the original plan for the battle."
"But with everything that Aegon did and the ringleader status he inhabited in Aemond's childhood, there's an awful lot of evidence to support that."
"What Aemond did was intentional, but whether or not it was premeditated is another thing."
SO WHEN YOU WERE ACTING ALONGSIDE AEGON IN THE LATER EPISODES WHEN THERE'S A CONFRONTATION AT HIS SICK BED, THAT WAS WITH THE KKOWLEDGE OF MALICIOUS INTENT?
"I think so."
"Their relationship is so multifaceted."
"There's a hatred for his brother, but also a certain love that he always craved from him."
"Aegon was supposed to be his big brother."
"He was supposed to look out for him."
"He just never did."
"I thought there was something really fascinating in the fact that Aemond left that marble marker on Aegon’s chest."
"Maybe he left it there for him in a way to say, “The chair's there for you when the war is finished,” or he might've just been pressing the stone marker into his chest to make him hurt that little bit more."
IN EPISODE 8, WE FIRST SEE AEMOND AFTER HE RAZES THE ENTIRETY OF SHARP POINT BECAUSE HE'S MAD ABOUT RHAENYRA'S NEW DRAGON FORCES. WHAT IS GOING THROUGH HIS MIND?
"It's a spur-of-the-moment retaliation."
"He has to overcompensate for this newfound knowledge that Rhaenyra has raised new dragonriders against him and changed the tide of the war."
"Sharp Point, from what I understand of the geography of Westeros, is actually very closely connected to The Gullet."
"Aemond feels like it's justified."
"He's destroying a bit of the Gullet and destroying the blockade that Rhaenyra set up at the beginning of Season 2."
"But ultimately, what he does is atrocious."
WE NEXT SEE HIM TALKING ABOUT THE SMALLFOLK HAVING TO SACRIFICE FOR THE WAR EFFORT. WHAT IS AEMOND SACRIFICING?
It goes back to that moment when Helaena's by the throne Aemond's just gazing up at it and Helaena says, “Was it worth the price?”
"Ultimately, what he sacrificed is his humanity."
"It's that theme that is so prevalent throughout our series: whether love trumps duty or duty trumps love."
"In Aemond's eye, love is a weakness."
WE SEE HIM CONFRONT ALICENT IN THIS EPISODE AND BASICALLY ACCUSE HER OF HAVING TOO MUCH COMPASSION. DOES AEMOND SEE HER AS AN ENEMY? IS THERE ANY AFFECTION REMAINING?
"I think there is."
"One of the main motivations I've played from the beginning of Season 2 was this idea that he wants his mum."
I think he's heartbroken when he says, “Would you not have us prevail?” and she says, “Not like this.”
"That's not part of Aemond's vision."
When he sent Alicent away in Episode 6, he said, “Look, let me deal with the war.”
"You just wait by the margins and then when I've won this war, we can pick up and work on our relationship."
"But the fact that she rebukes him at that moment in Episode 8, he's heartbroken."
"It's horrible for Aemond to comprehend that his mom isn't on his side."
SPEAKING OF WOMEN IN AEMOND'S LIFE, HELAENA GOES TO AEMOND AND ACCUSES HIM OF BURNING AEGON PURPOSEFULLY AND HINTS AT AEMOND'S DEATH. IS HE SHAKEN BY THAT?
"He's definitely shaken."
In an act of desperation, he goes to his sister and says, “Look, you and me, we need to ride out. We need to go to the Riverlands. We need to take out Daemon and destroy all of the influence that he has with the houses of the Riverlands.”
"Aemond is ultimately rebuked by both Alicent and Helaena."
"He's always had this very singular vision of how everything was going to go down."
"But when that starts to get challenged, when he recognizes that Alicent and Helaena aren't on his side, and then when Helaena comes out with this prophecy."
I think a part of him definitely thinks, “Oh no, my sister could be right.”
WHAT CAN WE EXPECT FROM AEMOND IN SEASON 3?
"I think you're going to see someone who's a lot more desperate and a lot more erratic."
"Targaryens were always considered closer to gods than men."
"And what Rhaenyra does at the end of Episode 7 very much challenges and questions the belief that you have to be a legitimate Targaryen to ride a dragon."
"And although their heritage from what we've heard sounds pretty legit, the rest of Westeros doesn’t see that."
"As Aemond says at the end of Episode 8 in that confrontation with his mother and his sister, the people of Westeros ultimately see commonfolk made into dragon lords."
"It very much paints a large target not only on Aemond's back but also on the back of all the Targaryens."
"It compromises their god-like status in a sense."
"And Aemond is definitely going to retaliate."
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tulipe-rose · 14 days ago
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This isn't talked about enough.
Akutagawa here is adamant that evil must pay the price for its deeds. Kenji agrees with him, even recognizing the way he downplayed the harm done, because to Akutagawa, he was basically disregarding all of their hard work as something so easy to let go of. That it was as replaceable as a broken cup.
To Kenji, he may be used to it, so it really doesn't matter much, in the sense where they could just replant it, and just be glad that it wasn't all ruined. But to Akutagawa, it isn't everyday that he works so hard on something only to have it destroyed by a selfish someone you can exact revenge on. Someone who deserves the wrath and pain of ruining the genuine hard work and heart put into the rice paddies. Kenji recognizes and apologizes because he understands. And that's just so mature of him.
Not to mention that he agrees with Akutagawa's perspective and resentment to an extent, the 'may' showing that there are some things he doesn't agree with. He knows what it's like–and is completely fine with having to–to fight foes when talking things out doesn't work, because that's the only way they're going to listen and respect what he's trying to say to them. He's instilled fear and guilt into the hearts of those who have wronged him, and those who didn't alike, using it to his advantage. It's how he protects his loved ones from harm, so he sees no harm in embracing it.
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The key difference here is that despite it all, he continues to bear no ill will towards any of his foes, with the circumstances taken into consideration. He'll probably never go as far as murder unless he was paying them back in like to what they did to someone he cared for. ‘Killing people is bad’, he did say, yes, but not everyone abides by their ideals under the heavy influence of grief and anger.
Especially not Kenji.
He would resort to murder in a fit of rage, and I really don't know how he'd feel about his actions after it passes. He's as kind as a saint in his own way, but he keeps a thick red line painted at hurting his friends.
So yes, he does believe retribution is important for those who wrong others, just how it's done depends on the severity to him; it's not all worth murder.
It'd take a long period of time, months upon months, before Akutagawa eventually widens his tunnel view vision. It'd be stupid to try to rush him instead of taking things at a slower pace, teaching him life lessons here and there when it called for it until things came full circle to form a slightly broader outlook, increasing his problem solving steps and not jumping to murder and threats at the slightest inconvenience.
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andywritingstuff · 1 month ago
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“Everything I touch turns to poison.”
 Geto Suguru loves nobody. His heart gave up years ago, unable to feel anything that wasn’t a hunger sated only with power and vengeance against those civilian monkeys that believe they’re better than everybody, yet are the worst thing that has graced this damned planet.
  “Everything I touch turns to poison.”
The girls - those he rescued when they were barely kids, mistreated and abused by ignorants - are the live example of it: girls with a great talent, transformed into the perfect vessels to carry on his war plan against humans and sorcerers that stood in his way; girls that were just learning how to survive the world…
How did they end up?
Geto Suguru is a broken person. A person that cannot be trusted. If he betrayed his best friend, how can somebody trust him? How can someone look at him in the eyes and see something worthy of appreciation and trust?
You…
How did you see it?
 No, the question must be reiterated: how is it that, despite everything, you took his blood-stained hand and kissed his knuckles, looking at him as if he was the most precious thing on Earth? How did you have the guts to stroke his hair and murmur sweet words into his ear when he felt his world falling apart on his shoulders while he was unable to do anything about it?
 “Everything I touch turns to poison.” 
It’s just a matter of time for your sweetness to turn sour, for the warmth of your hands to become as hot as lava; now comforting, it will become ardent and hurtful. It’s just a matter of time that you realize he’s a farce. That now he’s not as sure of what he believes in, of what he wants to do.
And maybe the answer lies in the most simple and obvious: he is the venom.
He gets in your bloodstream and contaminates you, takes from you what he needs. Mixes in with your blood and controls your body. He spreads out and occupies every part of you until you’re useless to him, and then leaves you being a carcass of your former self.
“Everything I touch turns to poison.”
 That’s why it’s best for him to get away and never come back. Leave a letter, at most, and never contact you again. Getting away is easy. He did it once with Satoru, what’s doing it once more?
But, really… Suguru is tired of running away. He’s the strongest, isn’t he? Then, why does his heart tremble whenever he thinks of being with you? With your infinite kindliness, he should be the one that refers to you with the utmost respect, like many others refer to him. With your beauty, he should cover his eyes whenever you pass by. Kneel to the floor with his forehead on the ground to avoid looking at you if he doesn’t want to perish at the sight. He should be adoring you, and not the other way around.
 What have you done to this man? You’ve destroyed him, do you even notice? Do you notice how he tries to keep calm whenever you’re around but his eyes betray him? The eyes are the windows to the soul, or so artists say. He’s presenting it to you entirely. He observes you, waiting - hoping - that your gaze finds his own and creates this click! he desperately desires.
And when it finally happens, he can’t help but ask himself if you feel as intensely as he does.
Does your heart beat like his?
Do you get goosebumps?
Do you feel your lungs burning inside you?
He can only hope you do.
 This intensity he feels, do you feel it too? But, then again - Geto Suguru is not someone who feels lightly.
  “Everything I touch turns to poison.”
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iamnotoriginalphil · 7 months ago
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The Hurt (Kate Stewart x gn!Reader)
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Synopsis: You're just a little too in love with your boss.
Words: 2.4k
Warnings: unrequited feelings, like one swear word
AN: I loved how much Kate we got to see in the last season so I figured I'd see if anyone else loves her like I do.
It shouldn’t be so difficult. It shouldn’t. You sat, and you worked, and if you were lucky you got to go out in the field. You were living your dream. Science that made a difference. Science that could one day change the world. Science unlike anything you could imagine when you’d been doing your undergraduate degree all those years ago. 
It shouldn’t hurt. 
And it wouldn’t, if not for her. The woman who turned your dreams into something not quite so sweet. The only one who made your work torture.
Kate Stewart. Your boss. And the only person in the room you couldn’t look away from. 
She was electrifying. So passionate. When she spoke you couldn’t help but listen. You’d follow her into fire with little more than a single look. The perfect leader, a mix of compassionate and hard working and so smart it blew your mind. She lit up the room and made everyone want to work that little bit harder. 
It didn’t hurt that she was beautiful.
Her commanding presence only added to it. She was intriguing, drawing you in, and if she wasn’t so passionate about her work she wouldn’t be nearly so enticing. Just being in her presence was enough to turn your knees to jelly and have your heart beating too fast. 
The hurt was deeply embedded in your identity, you weren’t sure who you would be without it. 
You weren’t anyone important. One of the brains down in the labs, analysing the tech that came in and learning to replicate it. You doubt she even knew your name. But you knew her and it was slowly destroying you from the inside out. 
You kept thinking that maybe if you put in more hours, if you proved your worth, if you had some massive breakthrough, she might learn your name. 
That was until the love of the job pulled you in again. You were, at your heart, a scientist. Alien technology was like showing a child a magic trick. You were determined to figure out how it was done. It was the kind of playground most scientists could only dream about. And you were one of the lucky few that got to be in the sandbox. 
The point was, it was easy to get lost in your work. You didn’t realise how late it had gotten until you looked up and realised you were completely alone in the lab. Stretching your arms above your head, you felt the ache in your spine. You’d been hunched over too long, fiddling with all the tiny bits of a something that had been dropped off to you that morning.
“I see I’m not the only one burning the midnight oil.”
You startled, almost falling off your stool. Grasping the edge of the bench you righted yourself before turning around. Kate, in all her resplendent glory, not even having the decency to look as tired as you were beginning to feel, was making her way towards you. One hand in her trouser pocket and a small smile on her face, you felt like a deer in the headlights under her amused gaze.
“What are you working on?” she asked.
“Oh, uh… I think it’s some kind of energy… convertor… thing,” you replied, “I’m still figuring it out.”
“Did that come in from the York site this morning?” she asked.
“Mmhm,” you hummed, looking back down at it.
You only looked up when you saw her taking a seat across from you. Even now, in a mostly dark lab, she didn’t look half as tired as you felt. Blonde hair still sleek, brown eyes with the twinkle of curiosity, dressed impeccably. It wasn’t fair when you were sure you looked a mess. 
“You’re often here late,” she said, those warm brown eyes landing on you. 
“There’s so much to learn,” you replied with a small shrug, “sometimes it’s hard to drag myself away.”
“Now that’s a sentiment I can understand,” she said with a small chuckle. 
You weren’t really sure what to say. It was so easy to feel tongue tied around her, basking in her commanding aura, the way she wielded her personality like it was nothing, like it wouldn’t fucking wreck you. When she looked at you the way she was now, all soft edges and familiarity and intimacy, it made your head spin. 
But maybe that’s what made her such a good leader. She could talk to the grunts as if they were just as important as the leadership teams. She could make you feel like she was interested in you. Which was dangerous for a number of reasons. 
“Sometimes I miss being in the lab doing the science. Truth is, this place feels more like home than my desk upstairs,” she said into the silence, looking around the darkened space. 
“You could always come back,” you said then immediately felt a wave of embarrassment. Of course she wouldn’t. She had more important things to spend her time on. Like saving the world, mostly. 
“If I had the time, believe me, I would.” The small smile she sent in your direction had your heart fluttering. 
“I can’t imagine ever giving this up,” you said, not sure if you were talking about your work or the moment you were sharing with her. 
“There’s really nothing you think might be more important or worth your time?” The twinkle in her eye was really beginning to make you feel breathless. 
“I like being in the guts of the thing. Other people are better suited for the brain,” you replied with a small shrug. 
Her laugh was throaty, warm, intimate. The kind of thing you’d hear while sharing a drink in a secluded bar. Not like your boss asking you about your work. Not that she really was. But looking at you from under lowered lashes, in the dim light, lit up by the lamp sitting on your desk to highlight the alien tech, the soft look on her face, it was hard to remember she was your boss.
“Although I think you’re the heart of the whole thing,” you murmured. 
Something in her face brightened, gratification softening every line of her body. The way she smiled was enough to make you willing to do anything to see it again. It was dangerous, the way you would give her every part of you to earn that smile. 
“When I was a little girl, I resented UNIT so much. It stole all of my father’s time and attention and he had none left for me. I didn’t realise what he was building. All I knew was that it was more important than me to him,” she said, voice soft as her mind drifted. 
You froze, listening to her, wanting to hear more.
“But when I did see him, the stories he told. Oh, they were wonderful. Stories of aliens and time travel, and a man in a small blue box. I wanted to know more. I craved it. I dreamt about the universe out there and all the things it held. I wanted to know it all.”
You lent forward. 
“It took a while but I got my degree and I joined UNIT. And I got to do science like I’d never seen before. So many species I'd never even imagined, coming here to Earth and I had access to them here. Not in this exact lab. Back then we were more hidden and a few decades behind technologically speaking, but one like it. I spent hours here. Nights. Weekends. You couldn’t drag me out of here. And then I understood why Dad spent all his time here. It’s an addiction.”
You were nodding. Because you got it. This job, the things you saw, the puzzles you got to take apart and put back together again, it was like nothing you’d ever experienced. Just look at what you’d been working on when she’d found you. You wouldn’t get that working at Google or for a pharmaceutical company. This was the kind of stuff science dreams were made of. 
“It’s that moment when it all suddenly makes sense. The fog clears and you understand how something works. All of the long hours and the frustration and the confusion are worth it. And then you know more about this universe and how it works and no one else on the planet has that information. There’s no feeling like it.”
Your breath caught. The way she spoke about it was like she was reaching into your chest and grasping your heart in a tight fist. Twisting your guts. Because that was it. That was exactly it. 
“And that’s not even the parts that make me love science. Unravelling the secrets of the universe is wonderful but it’s not what gets me out of bed in the morning. It’s satiating my own curiosity. It’s understanding the world we live in better. It’s getting the chance to ask questions and find the answers as I give in to my own need to know. It’s looking at something like this…”
One finger tapped the top of your alien device. 
“And knowing just a bit more than the day before.”
Your lips parted as you dragged your gaze back up to her, finding her already watching you. She was leaning towards you, over the bench and you realised how close your faces had grown. You blinked, ready to draw back, put more space between you.
“My father always said ‘science leads’. A quote from the Doctor. But it’s the work being done in this lab and others like it that make my job possible. This work guides the decisions I make for this organisation. And through it I can continue my father’s legacy and build something he would be proud of,” she said, her fingers still on the unknown device on the bench. And still looking at you. 
“I think he’d be very proud of you,” you said.
“Thank you.” Her hand drew back, putting her back on her side of the bench, “I know what I do is important, but I still miss this.”
“Do you want to help with this? Might scratch that itch,” you offered.
When she settled beside you, on your side of the bench, you felt your heart flutter. Shoulder to shoulder, you bent towards the wiring and the metal, her hair brushing against your skin. It was strange, the conflict you felt inside, sitting there with her in the small circle of light. 
On the one hand, she was so confident in the work, almost as if she was able to read your mind. She could predict what you were thinking and what you were going to do with ease. On the other, she was close enough you could smell the perfume that clung to her skin, and the warmth of her body washing over you. It was a very specific kind of torture and one you would willingly submit to every night for just one more moment like this. 
“Your work on that laser bomb was brilliant,” she murmured, “and that report you wrote on the blue tree was beautiful.”
You startled, dropping the tiny screwdriver you’d been holding. Her warm chuckle against your ear was enough to have your heart fluttering without pause. 
“I didn’t think you knew who I was,” you admitted, picking it up again, trying not to let her see the shockwaves of her laughter still moving through your body. 
“You’re one of my best,” she said, so unaware how that one little word made your heart skip a beat. My. A claiming you hadn’t known you’d wanted. Even more than the compliment. 
You turned your head, finding her so close. You were practically sharing the same air. Noses close to brushing. You froze, not sure what to do when she was so close. Her lips quirked up in a small smile and your gaze darted down to them then back up, embarrassment curling in your stomach. But you were only human. And she was so very tempting. 
“Of course I know you,” she whispered.
The moment hung between you, strung out until it was taut. Any moment it would break, time speeding up once more to compensate for the stolen time between heartbeats. But for now, you could marvel at the way she was looking at you, like you’d split open right down the middle, baring your soul to her. Those eyes, never missing a detail, looked at you as if she could see you. Really see you. Right down into all the crevices no one ever bothered looking at. You were splayed open for her to see. 
The way her eyes burned, you thought she might like whatever it was she could see. 
One of the night guards rounded the corner of the hall, whistling loud in the night’s silence. Your breath stuttered in your chest and she lent away from you, disappointment swimming in dark eyes. 
“It’s late,” she said.
“It is,” you agreed, not able to say anything else.
“You should return home, get some sleep,” she said.
“Is that what you’re going to do?” you asked, surprised by the need to know, to be able to picture her once she was no longer standing in front of you.
“I hope so,” she said, that same small smile back on her face.
“Goodnight,” you said with a small nod.
“Goodnight,” she said, her hand coming to rest on your shoulder, “sweet dreams.”
Her hand squeezed, lingering a moment longer, sending heat licking over your skin. She turned, a hand in her trouser pocket, and you watched her walk away from you. The shadows swallowed her, heels echoing down empty hallways as she left you with your work.
The hope that had welled in your chest remained, slow to drain. You could still smell her perfume on the air, feel the warmth of her body, hear her chuckle soft in your ear, more vibration than sound. 
And maybe that was the truth of it. That hope, when it came to Kate Stewart, hurt worst of all.
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jedi-enthusiasm-blog · 1 month ago
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The Many Names of Peace (pt.2/?): Compassion
Inspired by Why We Did Nothing by BairnSidhe
Part I | Part II
CONTENT WARNINGS:
Genocide (discussed). The Dral'han/Excision is mentioned and spoken about for a few paragraphs.
Child murder (discussed). Padawan hunting is haunts the narrative, and one of the victims was the main character's brother.
Corpse desecration (mentioned). Padawan braids and beads are found in Mandalorian art and stolen Lightsabers are carried on belts.
Missing children (discussed). A Master and a very young Padawan have disappeared in a high risk field post.
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"But… still" Terith swallows hard, shaking their head. They don't like it, but they understand where the Jetiise of that time were coming from. But the present… "The Dral'han was a time long ago, and you offer much to nearly everyone else. Yet you never reach that benevolent hand toward Mandalore. You've never even tried to repair what they destroyed." 
Terith has seen Manda'yaim. They know how much damage the Dral'han did to the planet. They know many people died, they know entire Clans were wiped out from existance. Sometimes, they wonder how many of the dead had nobody left to say the Remembrances for them.
The Jetiise did nothing. Even if Terith can understand why, it doesn't absolve them. A genocide, the blood of a people, is on their hands.
"We will." Zahara responds, with the easy confidence that comes from faith in her people, from the knowledge of what they have done to help everybody, even those who hurt them.
"That claim has been unfounded so far, Jetii" Terith shoots back, not as angry as before but still furious over the lack of action from those who are supposed to be the guardians of peace and justice. "Despite every petition for aid and reconciliation, despite Mand'alor after Mand'alor swallowing their pride for the sake of their people. Of course people call you heartless, why shouldn't they, when you show no sign of that compassion you claim to uphold? I bet you don't even consider Mandalore beyond History lessons on the barbarians from the Outer Rim."
Zahara can't help it. She chuckles. The Mandalorian doesn't know, cannot imagine how wrong they are. But this time it's only ignorance, and ignorance can be fixed.
Delahm, kyii leo’yth.
"It's actually a favorite assignment for young Jedi Service Corps members" the kage Jedi says wryly. "How to save you, when you exist so close to destruction every day. It's used to teach problem solving, since there are a million ways to do it. I'm not a Service Corps member so I'll admit my knowledge is limited, but according to my… friends, the Corps have been collecting the best ideas for… over seven hundred and sixty years, actually."
Under their buy'ce, Terith's jaw drops. They try to speak, but it only comes out as a wordless sound of disbelief.
"We don't just consider your suffering, we have plans to end it, and we will." Zahara adds, seeing as the Mandalorian is too surprised and confused to interrupt her. Then she shrugs, there are more decisions involved than she has power over —the Senate will have the final say. "One day. Maybe."
"What do you mean maybe?!" Terith demands. "You Jetiise get some sort of sick pleasure of having the keys to saving my people and do nothing to help us out, all for some grudge against long dead Mando'ade?!"
"Who said 'long dead'?!" Zahara snarls, feeling the familiar sharp cold of fury curling in her stomach, her mind conjuring the memory of a light snuffed out, and a familiar braid hanging from a different set of armor.
The Mandalorian's fury swirls in the Force, and it takes all of Zahara's willpower to ignore it. Her mental shields will be metaphorical splinters at this rate. She grits her teeth and slowly breathes in and out.
Kai’an. Soo’yth, kyii kai’an. Bexlyth, kyii maijah.
"If we stood by once because our lives and memories are long, yes, it was petty, cruel and beneath us" Zahara agrees easily. It was wrong and, even if she understands their reaction emotionally, the Shadow will make no attempt to justify it. Unfortunately, there is the milodon in the room yet to adress, and it seems like Terith will not get it until she spells it out for them. "But is pettiness, is it cruelty, to protect our people now? From very real and current threats?
"We will give you the plans, we will give you our aid, we will grant you our forgiveness and friendship" Zahara places her right hand over her heart, in the kage gesture of oath taking. "We will give you everything… when the hunts, murders and desecrations stop."
"Wait. Wait. What do you mean when they stop?!" Terith questions, fighting against rising horror. "The Jetii hunts happened centuries ago…!"
"Two of my Siblings are dead at Mandalorian hands" Zahara cuts them off. Fire burns in her eyes as she remembers the desecrations she's seen, the braids and beads decorating tapestries, the Lightsabers hanging from unworthy belts. She understands ignorance, but she will not let this armored aristocrat dictate a rewrite her of people's tragedy. The kage Jedi will not allow Terith to look away from what their people have done. "The most recent Mandalorian murders of Jedi were mere months ago."
The Jetii steps foward, and Terith takes a step back. The most recent. Two vod dead at the hands of Mando'ade. She makes no more attempts to approach them, but Terith isn't fooled. They know the rumors of Jetiise being able to kill people with their minds. Even without armor, even without weapons —although they doubt she doesn't carry a kad'au, since all Jetiise seem to—, even tied up and blindfolded, the near-human Jetii is one of, if not the, most dangerous being in the area.
"You only draw breath because I don't see braids or beads decorating your armor" Zahara says slowly, wanting to make sure the message sinks in. "Thus I'm going to assume you've killed no younglings of my people, at least recently. As a show of kindness and goodwill. Like I've said before, Jedi are merciful."
There's an explosion close by. The building shakes, and Zahara pulls herself out of her memories. She's not here to get justice that borders on revenge —if it isn't outright—, she's here to find the missing Jaieh-Padawan pair that got caught in the crossfire of her homeplanet's war.
"If you, or any with you, have harmed the Knight or, Force forbid, the missing youngling I'm trying to find" she whispers, so low Terith's buy'ce almost doesn't pick it up, "I'm going to, without a care for the Code against murder and revenge and the Republic restrictions on my people, tear you apart limb from limb."
"Wait. Wait. There's an adiika in this mess?!" Terith exclaims in alarm. "What happened?!"
Zahara sighs, feeling all the anger leave her as quickly as it came. The unexpected reaction from the Mandalorian has knocked all the fight out of her. So, she falls back on the same base all Jedi rely on: the sharing of knowledge.
"A long story involving a Master taking in a youngling older than usual despite the Republic's restrictions, which started a chain reaction of massive proportions" Zahara doesn't say what the massive proportions are. One would need to be a Jedi and have all the details, otherwise they'd find it ridiculous. She's a Jedi and knows the details and still finds it ridiculous. "Said chain reaction led to the Master getting killed in the middle of a war and his grieving Padawan being Knighted in a rush in order to raise and train the youngling."
Terith's heart goes out for the adiika and their cabur. Poor Jet'verd, promoted too soon after the death of their mentor and having to take care of a grieving and lost ad.
"Somehow, this led to the Jaieh-Padawan pair being sent to mediate a corporate dispute on this kriffing planet in the middle of a war, which is not a training post, it's a high risk field post" the Jetii goes on, and her worry for the missing adiika is genuine. "Particularly because of its proximity to space marked as Knight and Master only, because our Padawans, our younglings, don't come back."
"You mean Mandalorian space" Terith says, and there's something in their voice. Not acceptance or understanding, but… resignation. A willingness not to question the Jedi's experiences.
"Yeah" Zahara agrees, "I do."
(Notes under the cut)
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Dai Bendu
Delahm, kyii leo’yth — ignorance, yet knowledge
Kai'an — inner balance, inner peace
Soo’yth, kyii kai’an — emotion, yet peace
Bexlyth, kyii maijah — passion, yet serenity
Mando'a
Jetiise — Jedi (plural)
Jetii — Jedi (singular)
Manda'yaim — lit. "Home of the Mandalorian soul", planet Mandalore
Buy'ce — helmet
Mando'ade — Mandalorians. Lit "children of Mandalore"
Kad'au — Lightsaber
Adiika — child, kid, someone under thirteen.
Cabur — guardian, person who's taking care of a child but isn't their parent.
Dral'han is the orbital bombardment of Mandalore, done by the Republic in roughly 800BBY. As Terith says, entire Clans were wiped out from existance. They understand why the Jedi didn't do anything (in fact, they're self-aware enough to know they'd do worse), but they're still angry, rightfully so. Zahara knows it too, makes no attempt to justify it, and explains that most Jedi know it was fucked up and are making plans for reparations.
Terith: *says Mandalorians have attempted reconciliation, that the Mandalorians who kill Jedi Padawans are all dead and that Jedi don't consider the Mandalorians' plight* Zahara: Amazing. Every word of what you just said was wrong.
Zahara means her enishee and Padawan-sibling. She stumbles over the words because there is no good translation in Basic.
"Over seven hundred and sixty years" AKA since the Dral'han.
Milodons are huge, insect-like animals native to Quarzite, the kages' home planet. Kage Warriors often use them as mounts. And, because kage memory is Like That, Zahara has fond memories of riding a milodon as a toddler. Like most other Jedi, Zahara is very close to the culture she was born in and has incorporated many Kage Warrior traditions into her life (now I'll have brain-rot about this fictional culture we know literally nothing about in order to flesh out Zahara more, yay!).
The right hand over the heart (left side of the chest for kages, humans and kiffars, varies in other species) is the kage gesture of oath taking. However, it's also a Mandalorian salute. Terith is a bit confused, but easily and correctly guesses it's a gesture of oath taking, but incorrectly assumes it's a Jedi one.
"We will help you once we are sure you won't murder our children" is not exactly an unreasonable demand. Unfortunately, many Mandalorians don't know it's still happening because bigots and Jedi hunters have learned to hide their…hobbies. So, to them, it looks like the Jedi still hold a grudge for something that happened (under their point of view, remember different species have widely different lifespans and memories) a long time ago. It's common in fanfiction to depict Mandalorians as diverse, but in the many canonical sources I've checked (Disney and Legends), while there has been alien ancestry mentioned (which isn't a feat considering the size of the galaxy), those considered Mandalorians are nearly always human. It's weird. So I've decided that there are multiple species among Mandalorians, but most of them are near-humans (trogutas, zabraks, twi'leks, kiffars, kages, etc), not netis, kel dors or whatever species Yoda is, so they don't have members of long-lived species that lived through the Excision or the New Sith Wars, unlike the Jedi who do have first hand accounts.
"Two of my Siblings are dead at Mandalorian hands" Drovan her crechemate is the first "sibling" of Zahara's killed by Mandalorians. The other (who hasn't come up yet) is Feemor. Feemor was registered as a Watchman and a Finder, although he was actually a Shadow, and adored kids. His death kickstarts a chain reaction of events of epic, galactic-wide proportions, so any details will be spoilers (Zahara says siblings because there is no good word in Basic to describe Jedi relationships She once claimed Basic sucks as a teenager and hasn't backed down since)
For the record, I'd like to state the Battle of Galindraan has already happened here. I want to state that, despite common fandom misconception, the Mandalorians shot first. While the Jedi had their Lightsabers drawn (perfectly reasonable considering the Mandalorians are enemies nearly as ancient as the Sith), they were a fair distance away and couldn't attack unless they were reflecting blaster shots ie. self defense.
"Armored aristocrat". This misunderstanding is a result of a cultural miscommunication. In the past (when Tarre Vizla was alive and Jedi-Mandalorian relationships were "enemy of my enemy" rather than complete animosity), only those born in important Houses (Vizla, Wren and Kryze) could afford a full beskar armor (those Houses have a few hundred people each). Beskar is, after all, rare and expensive. This is why Zahara assumes Terith is from a noble House, which in her mind translates to "aristocratic bastard". However, the gorane decided, at some point when the Houses' influence had dimmed, to dilute and alloy beskar with other more common and less expensive metals, both to make their jobs easier and to give more people armor. This, paired with the recent trend of passing down armor through families, most Mandalorians have their own beskar'gam instead of just the kar'ta (heart of the armor, where the sigil representing Clan and faction is).
To add to the above point, choosing to make Wren and Vizla important Houses was because, in TCW, it's mentioned that most people want Satine as a ruler and are in favor of, at least, most of her policies and reforms, but the warrior elite hates her guts (which implies most Mandalorians aren't actually warriors, unlike what fanon seems to believe, only the elite can be warriors).
Said warrior elite founded Death Watch to commit terrorism and scare the people enough that they'd accept them ruling with an iron fist. Death Watch members are basically privileged nobles and aristocrats throwing a temper tantrum because they can't get away with being assholes anymore.
The mission to Quarzite was supposed to be simple and easy enough for a young Knight and their very young Padawan. But the Senate is careless with Jedi lives, and sends them on missions understaffed or with faulty intel every other time. A missing Padawan, particularly a Padawan as young as the one missing, is cause for alarm. Hence why Zahara was pulled from the investigation of Feemor's murder and sent to find the missing Knight and Padawan. The Council isn't very optimistic, but they want to have corpses to burn, Lightsabers and kybers to honor them and some consolation of knowing what happened to them.
In case it wasn't clear, the Knight and Padawan that went missing in the middle of a warzone are Obi-Wan and Anakin. Because of course they are, it's Obi-Wan and Anakin we're talking about.
The war Zahara mentions is the one between kages and belugans. The belugans have been subjugating the kages for centuries, and the kages fighting back caused the start of a war. Anakin and Obi-Wan were supposed to negotiate a standard and boring corporate dispute between two belugan corporations. However, Anakin is beginning to learn bad behaviors (mainly from Palpatine) and decided to do something stupidly reckless.
"Somehow". Indeed, the Jedi have no fucking idea of how all those events even fit together. Then they realize Obi-Wan and Anakin are members of Yoda's line and go "yeah that makes sense." Feemor is the only sane one in that crazy lineage, and he's a fucking Shadow that busts slave rings in his downtime!
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bats-and-birds-24 · 9 months ago
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Chapter 2:
The first time Bruce's heart shattered, he saw his parents shot dead in front of him.
The second time his heart shattered, he was carrying Jason's broken body out of a destroyed warehouse.
After Jason's death, Bruce's mind would not let him rest. He didn't deserve to, not after failing his son that badly.
Sounds of Jason screaming for Bruce, mixed with the Joker's cacophony of gory clangs of crowbar cracking bone, were etched into his mind.
His thoughts took over his life.
He should've noticed that Jason had left to go meet up with his so called "mother".
He needed to be better, Gotham needed to be safer.
He will make Gotham safe.
It started with him cracking down on the Joker gang, but then he started to expand the list, any criminal who hurt kids would face his wrath.
All he would see in his mind's eye as he punched them to bloody unconsciousness was the Joker's face.
Batman might have broken his oath if he had caught sight of Joker during those days.
In the middle of the haze filled bloodbath that was Bruce's life after Jason's death, he somehow managed to miss a curious pair of eyes following him from rooftop to rooftop.
The first time he met Tim, Bruce flinched.
Another dark haired child with determination sparking in his eyes.
He can't do this again.
It got worse when he said he wanted to be Robin.
"Batman needs a Robin." He stated matter of factly.
Even though his hands trembled his eyes were locked with Bruce's own.
Tim was scared but determined.
"Robin's done, he's dead. No one else can be Robin again." Bruce croaked out. The kid's face looked crestfallen.
Good, maybe he'll avoid Batman from now on.
Bruce should've known it wouldn't be that easy. Tim had somehow managed to get Dick on his side.
How he managed to do that was a mystery, as Bruce himself was iced out of Dick's life.
Their communication being brief and work related.
The final straw was when Alfred managed to corner him in the library.
Jason's favourite spot in the manor.
"Master Bruce, you cannot keep avoiding young master Tim forever." Alfred stated
"It's for his own good Alfred." Bruce snapped not even looking up at him.
"Is it now? The boy's been running around with barely a jacket on in this cold, doing dangerous detective work to try and gain your approval." Alfred replied with a pointed stare.
"I tried to dissuade him." Bruce muttered.
"He's marked, you know that won't work." He sighed.
"Alfred I can't make him Robin, end of discussion." He replied in a frustrated huff.
In the end Alfred got his way.
He always did.
But the feeling wasn't the same. He didn't feel proud or happy when he saw Robin in the field anymore. Just relief that he's survived another day.
He kept a close eye on Tim as well, checking in via comms during patrol and spying in his bedroom to ensure that he hadn't snuck off into the chilly Gotham night.
He can't fail another Robin.
Until he did.
Tim had been caught by the Joker gang and he didn't even trust Bruce enough to call for help. He had multiple bruises and a dislocated shoulder.
He got away alive, but it could've gone worse.
Much worse.
Should he ban Tim from being Robin, should he tell his parents?
No that won't work, the Drakes barely seem involved in their son's life, Tim would probably find a way to circumvent the ban. The kid was too stubborn for his own good.
He was getting a headache.
Bruce rubbed his mark absently as he pondered on what to do.
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sky-fire-forever · 2 months ago
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DADWC time :D How does ❛  i know things aren't easy right now, but i want to remain a fixture in your life. after all, you're one in mine.  ❜ for Rook/Lucanis sound?? Obsessed about this pairing rn!
Thank you for the prompt! I tried something new with this, with it being from the point of view of someone outside of the pairing I’m writing it for. You can be the judge of how it turned out.
For @dadrunkwriting - Dragon Age: The Veilguard Spoilers
My Rook in this is Voltah de Riva, who uses they/them pronouns.
Caterina does not believe herself to be an unkind woman. Strict, perhaps, but it’s out of necessity. Everything she’s done has been for the good of her family, for the betterment of those who have survived. She’s lost too much to go soft now and lose it all. 
Part of wanting the best for her family is wanting the best partners for those who remain. Lucanis is the First Talon now and if he is to wed, he deserves the best, someone who will support him and who can fend for themselves if things turn sour. He deserves someone who will protect their standing and can provide heirs to house Dellamorte. 
What he doesn’t need is a Crow from another house grasping at power and encouraging dangerous ideas. 
“I fail to see the problem,” Lucanis says, his voice tight with irritation he can hardly contain. “Rook has done more than prove themself. They not only saved the world, but they helped put an end to Ilario’s misdeeds, they helped save you and they stopped a ravaging dragon from destroying Treviso. What more could you ask from them?” 
Caterina leans against her cane, a frown upon her lips. “Surely you can not be so blind, Lucanis.” It hurts her to break her grandson’s heart this way, but it’s far better than the alternative. “The de Rivas want the title of First Talon. You are standing in the way of that. All it would take would be your death and then–”
“Rook would never.” Lucanis sounds offended by the very idea. “They could not care less about my title. Their interest in me long predated my appointment as First Talon and I have no doubt that they would continue to love me if I were to lose that title entirely.” 
“You must be practical,” Caterina insists. “This is Viago’s protege. Do you not think he has trained them well? To manipulate and deceive?” 
“No more than any other Crow.” 
“But they are a Crow,” Caterina reminds him. “A Crow of a lesser standing who stands to win much by building a relationship with you. That is not even to speak of the way they encourage that thing inside of you.”
“Don’t bring Spite into this,” Lucanis warns.
“It is a demon, Lucanis. One that we should be focused on removing as soon as possible.” 
“As I have told you before, there is no separating us now.”
“Do you know that? Or are you simply unwilling to try?” She presses. “Because Rook told you not to bother trying?”
The idea of a demon remaining permanently within her grandson is terrifying in its possibility. It’s even more frightening that Lucanis doesn’t seem the least bit concerned with removing the foul creature inside of him. All because a pretty face told him to accept the demon as part of him. 
Caterina knows better. She knows her grandson is no demon. 
“Rook did not–”
“Would you give up your entire life for them? Throw away all we have worked for? For an upstart and a demon?” 
“That’s enough!” Lucanis snaps and Caterina is caught off guard enough to fall silent. “Enough. Please.” His voice turns from harsh to soft in a moment, guilt bleeding into his tone. 
She grips her cane tightly. “These are the questions you must ask yourself, Lucanis,” she says. “You can not run from them forever.” 
She leaves him to ponder her words, but doesn’t stray far, listening in to see how he reacts to what she has to say. She hopes he’ll listen, prays that he’ll see sense and abandon this childish romance of his. She wants nothing more than his happiness, save for his survival. 
She hears him sigh and she hesitates only a moment before following him out of the room. She sticks to the shadows, knowing from years of training how to follow even the most perceptive men without being spotted. She uses her old tricks now, trailing her grandson as he leaves the estate and climbs to the rooftops. 
She spots who he’s meeting right away, Rook’s face lit by moonlight as they pace back and forth on the ledge. 
They look up as Lucanis approaches, their face breaking into a grin. “So, how’d it go?” When Lucanis doesn’t respond, they whistle. “That bad, huh?” 
“I don’t understand it,” Lucanis says. “I thought she would see reason, but it’s like she’s incapable of believing our love is for love’s sake. Everything appears as a bid for power to her.” 
“Guess I am the power-hungry type,” Rook jokes. “I mean, it’s always been my dream to take over the world!” 
“Rook, please. Be serious.” 
Rook’s smile falls and they sit on the edge of the roof, their legs dangling off the side. “What do you want me to say, Lucanis?” They ask. “Your grandmother isn’t going to change her mind about me no matter what I do. She isn’t that kind of woman.” 
Lucanis sits beside them. “I know.”
“Then what do you want to do?” 
He sighs, considering. “I know things aren’t easy right now, but I want to remain a fixture in your life,” he says. “After all, you’re one in mine.”
Rook studies his face in the moonlight. “Good,” they say eventually. “I’m not letting you go that easily, Dellamorte.” 
“I would hope not.” 
The way Lucanis looks at his lover in what is believed to be a private moment gives Caterina a moment of hesitation. There’s love there, genuine and passionate. It’s more affection than she’s ever seen on her grandson’s face before. 
She hopes that love doesn’t get him killed.
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arlana-likes-to-write · 2 years ago
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Family is more than Blood - Masterlist
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You are the older sister of Natasha and Yelena, brought together by a Red Room Mission in Ohio. But to you blood doesn’t mean family and when the mission is over they are still your sisters. 
Main Story (2016 - 2018) 
Lean on Me by Bill Withers - Whispers of Natasha’s escape echo throughout the Red Room and you know it’s your chance to make a deal to ensure their safety. 
The World Turned Upside Down - Natasha and Yelena face the man that has destroyed the lives of so many young girls. They learn the things you had to do as part of your deal.  
Promise - As Melina goes through the data that Natasha took from Dreyokv, she finds your file and learns that your birthday is coming up. With the help of Natasha and the other Avengers, they try to give you a much needed break. 
What if I’m not needed? - Yelena wakes up from a nightmare and instead of going to Natasha she turns to you. 
Safe. You are Safe -  After returning to the compound from a solo mission to free a Widow, you are badly injured. But as a Widow injury means punishments and you can’t afford to be punished because who will protect your sisters if they kill you.
Patient - A higher level Widow is in NYC and you need your sisters help but when they can’t help you a new visitor to the compound may be the answer to your problems. 
A Helping a Hand - In 2013, Dreykov sends you on a mission that is a little below your skill level. But you don’t expect to run into the Avengers and your primary mission changed. 
Sugar Rush - Carol and you test the boundary of just being friends
You Have Yourself a Deal - Carol is worried when you don’t show up for your date and she has every reason to worry when Natasha and Melina get a link to a security feed of your torture chamber. 
Darkest Mind - Sometimes the voices and the guilt got to loud and the only way you knew how to quiet the world around you was through pain.
Accidents Happen - When Carol has a nightmare and hurts you with her powers, your sisters don’t take it to well.
Resolved - Forgiveness isn’t something easy to give but when your sister is taken it may be to late. 
At Your Back - Wanda needs a gentle reminder that she is not alone and she has gained another sibling at the compound. 
Resting on Your Shoulder - A trip to Iowa to met the Bartons is the perfect thing you need to rid your mind of Danie’s screams. 
Tiny Dancer -  After you and Natasha return to the compound, those closest to you know something bad happened. Carol learns another dark part of your past.
Mine to Protect - The Avengers capture a member of Dreykov’s second ring and he is asking for you.  
Doctor, Doctor - You are struggling to keep your head above water and you need help
Drabbles
A Trip Back Home - visiting Ohio with your sisters  
A Black Widow Halloween - Celebrating Halloween with the Avengers, cause some unwanted memories to come up. 
Through Your Eyes - You are learning how to be a person and undo all of Red Room trauma 
‘What Ifs’ 
It’s okay. Let me Go - Natasha calls you asking for a favor when an off world threat comes to threatens half of the Earth’s population.
Letters to a Goodbye - These are the letters you wrote to everyone before the time heist. Part 2 of It’s okay. Let me go. 
Face to Face - When Alexei tells you that the mission is over you’ve made a decision to give Melina, Yelena, and Natasha a chance to run 
Trust is Earned - Melina has made it clear that she doesn’t trust you, what can be done to earn her trust back? (Part 2 of Face to Face)
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satureja13 · 3 months ago
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It's the last night before the tests and - should they all pass - the last night on their home planet...
It's already late but the Boys are still awake. And they're learning diligently.
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Rubyn is tutoring Sai on Androids. Their fields of applications, their maintenance - and their dangers...
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Sai knows about their dangers just all too well now. And he wonders why Rubyn hadn't desintegrated her evil creation RoDri6ue2-B. Since they are about to do exactly that with Tiny Can...
Rubyn: "Do you think we have the right to do so?" Sai: "Why not? It's just a machine. Of course we have the right to turn it off - if it malfunctions and can't be repaired. And we even have the obligation to destroy machines that are a possible danger to mankind."
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Rubyn: "The following is what Captain Picard said at the hearing to Android Data's defense in the episode 'The Measure of a Man:
"Commander Riker has dramatically demonstrated to this court that Lieutenant Commander Data is a machine. Do we deny that? No, because it is not relevant: we, too, are machines, just machines of a different type. Commander Riker has also reminded us that Lieutenant Commander Data was created by a man; do we deny that? No. Again, it is not relevant. Children are created from the 'building blocks' of their parents' DNA. Are they property?"
I think it's not as easy as it seems. RoDri6ue2-B and Tiny Can are sentient beings. And even though RoDri6ue2-B is - let's say 'eccentric' - he never acted against the law. And the strive for world domination makes one excellent president material in some parts of this planet, right? Tiny Can only ever tried to help you - successfully. Hasn't he?" Sai wasn't convinced: "I don't know, they could be a potential danger in the future... Who knows what he's capable of?" Rubyn: "Well, anyone of us could be a 'potential danger' in the future. Jack, for example. He could spiral down again into madness anytime. Shall we withdraw him in advance, then?" Sai: "What? No!"
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And while Rubyn and Sai philosophized about what makes one 'human', Jack and Kiyoshi went to the small yard behind the workshop for Jack's martial arts training. He's designated as security officer and takes this very serious. Jack: "Argh! I just can't seem to get this Tal-Shaya move right!" Kiyoshi suggested to practise with him - boy-to-boy.
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The others already went to bed to be fit and well rested for the tests in the morning, so Kiyoshi and Jack went a bit away from the tents to not disturb them. Ah, how they'd missed this! They didn't know it then, but fighting is something they both really enjoyed back in their days as a (secret) couple.
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And just like in the good old days, the intense physical contact aroused them - significantly ö.Ö' Jack doesn't know what to do with all those feelings - and the need. He needed more of Kiyoshi - now!
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And Kiyoshi seems to feel the same way ö.Ö'
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They agreed to quickly take a cold shower and go to sleep!
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But the Romantium ore, Sai had threwn under the shrubbery, thwarted their plans and made them giving themselves over to absolute pleasure - as if they were remote-controlled.
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'Give yourself over to absolute pleasure Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh Erotic nightmares beyond any measure And sensual daydreams to treasure forever Can't you just see it?
Oh, oh, oh
Don't dream it, be it.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show
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And - of course - Sai and Jeb heard them. Sai: "These noises don't sound like fighting noises anymore... What are they doing again?!" Jeb is a bit jealous. These are exactly the noises he wants to make with Sai. But he can't - because he can't hurt him...
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Jack and Kiyoshi also didn't notice the ore when they crawled out of the bush. Jack even almost hit his foot on it!
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Sober and deflated, they are devastated of what they'd done again. Sure, they talked it out last time, but it still feels wrong - to both of them. Being as close and intimate as they are as mates, just mates is one thing. But woohooing (and let alone kissing) feels still weird. Even though they try hard not to make it weird.
Jack: "Do you think it's the heat again?" Kiyoshi: "Hm - I thought if I were your Alpha once again it would stop, after I - uhm ... claimed you once...? I'll ask Greg about it." Jack: "Maybe rather Uncle Stefan..." Kiyoshi: "Right." Because Jack hates Greg...
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From the Beginning 🔱 Underwater Love 🔱 Latest
Current Chapter: starts ▶️ here Last Chapter: 'Here comes the Sun' from the beginning ▶️ here
📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 23-29
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strangelittlestories · 11 months ago
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It was somewhere around a year into the apocalypse when the Lion and the Lamb found what they had long been looking for: a very remote (and thus largely unpillaged) and *very fancy* hotel.
(Lion and Lamb were the names I knew them by, at least. We met at a wedding - always a strange event in the end times - and they did not give me their true names. This was, honestly, a wise move given the kind of entity I am. But they did gift me with this anecdote, which perhaps reveals more about them than a simple name could.)
After scouting the place out - and bloodily evicting a small pack of ghouls that had gotten separated from the horde and (hopelessly lost) wandered into the hotel spa - the pair climbed the many steps to the building’s palatial penthouse suite.
There, they found many wondrous treasures. Fluffy bathrobes. Tiny sachets of shampoo. A bed so large it should probably have been illegal.
And, of course, a little peace and quiet.
---
“What do you think the thread count on these sheets are?” Asked Lamb.
“Do I look like the kind of person who understands thread count?” Lion was already lying in the bed, starfishing her limbs out across the pillowy expanse.
“It’s just…this might be the softest thing I’ve ever felt. This has got to be four hundred. Maybe even five?” Lamb’s brow wrinkled for a moment. “Hey - would you mind if I take this with us when we leave?”
“What’s the matter? You already afraid to go back to scratchy blankets and sleeping bags?” Lion grinned, while twisting the top off a little bottle of Jack Daniels. A small pile of tiny liquor bottles lay beside her; across the room, her axe rested against the sundered mini bar.
“No, I uh-” Lamb looked sheepish. “I was thinking it’d make for good bandages.”
Lion paused with the mini bottle of Jack on her lips. She made steady eye contact with Lamb as she downed the bottle, then threw it casually to one side.
“You want to take the sheets off this bed.” She sat up and calmly took hold of Lamb’s arm, pulling him close. “This bed that may as well be made of clouds. These covers that were probably hand spun by gods or artisanal Shoreditch arseholes. This bed that may be the last gift from a now-absent god, and which - by the way - we have not even hugged in yet…”
“Well, when you put it like that-”
“You want to take the sheets off this bed - this bed that is larger than some countries - and tear it up for stab wounds and bullet holes?”
“I just-”
At this point, Lion yanked on Lamb’s arm and he tumbled awkwardly into the aforementioned bed, rolling over Lion and landing nestled snugly in the crook of her shoulder. It was somewhere between a cuddle and a headlock and, if we’re being honest, Lamb really didn’t mind that.
Some time passed. We need not discuss how it passed, let us simply say that it did and that, for the Lion and the Lamb, its passage was necessary, healing and only mildly bruising.
Lamb sighed happily and said:
“I just thought. Y’know, about the bandages. That … well, dangerous shit happens to us so often. It’s really easy to get used to being scared. To being hurt. So I figured it might be nice, y’know, if when we were patching each other up, we had something soft to do it with. So that even when it hurts the most, we can *practise* being soft. And it’d be something that reminded us of this. This perfect day we stole for ourselves. A happy memory to literally bind up the hurt with.” Lamb looked shyly up at Lion. “It probably sounds silly. Or soppy. But, well. I am those things sometimes.”
Lion leant down and gently and carefully kissed Lamb on the forehead.
“Okay.” She said, in a voice roaring with love. “We can destroy the sheets when we’re done.”
“Thanks.” Said Lamb. “I knew you’d cotton on.”
And, even despite the pun, Lion could not have been happier.
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