#hourglass is a beautiful song but also so sad

[gabriellerudessa]

While there's still a good way to finish Compass (Norm Maclean x OC), I'm already taking notes and saving songs to a playlist for the kinda sequel where it will be Squire Thaddeus x OC (sequel because the OC is a character from Compass, Goose, but only this, "same timeline", and I plan on writing in such a way that reading Compass will not be needed).

Anyway.

I have a Title and as a consequence, Main Song

No I won't give explanations of WHY. But I'll say that Thaddeus will be destroyed in my hands 😬

[murkystarlight]

DREAMZZZ season2 spoilers part 5.

(And my personal comments)

First off- finally! I'm doing the last episode. I also have a small theory? Kind of thing? So.. yeah.

Episode 10

(Yay)

So... starting off with, WHY DID I NEVER NOTICE MADEO HAVING YELLOW TEETH??

It's so obvious and I had no friggin idea?!!

Okay. Now let's really start

The three(Iz, Cooper and Logan) standing in the bleachers together? Adorable.

What the heck is hummus?

"The Grand Inspector told us to compete as individuals. Teo's just following the rules."

(The the best time to be a supportive friend- I swear to god. He has a thing for Mateo. I just- it makes sense for some reason now)

"He's just.. acting like a jerk to get ahead, right?"

(Or maybe Cooper had a thing for rebels.)

I can't tell if Madeo has really dark purple hair. Or if it's black. Also, it has texture???

"Haha! The Never Which would never attack Castle Nocturnia. Our defenses are too strong"

Ooh.... he- ah... you... ooo...😓 how do we tell him guys-

"You can't be the guardian. Guardians are just statues or mountains or- whatever, until their realm is in terrible danger"

Actually. That's smart. How come we never thought of that??

And Phil replies with: "ah.. but Izzie. Castle Nocturnia is always in danger. So I. Am always awake. Alert"

Which... also. Kinda makes sense

"But I don't want you in danger either"

Awww- awh- no- oh my gah- look at em- look at them hugging like that.. why do they keep taking Izzie's fuzzy friends away from herr

"How could I been so stupid. All the red flags were there"

At least she acknowledges it 🚩🚩🚩

"Easy Zoey. You couldn't have known he was your dad"

~Bonding~ it's beautiful

"Everytime I got caught the night hunter let me go. He knew about my watch and my song when we first met. Well, the first time I met him"

Hat was both.... smart and sad

And a pinch of stupid

"-and got us trapped next to this clown"

"Who?? Me??? You think I'm funny?"

*yes. Actually. The nightmare king became a comedian

Mateo making stuff without an hourglass... wow... it's a thing.l he can do. Guess we can put that to good use later (also- what's with the dramatic music? He literally made a chainsaw out of a green blob/smile thing)

"I wish we never made Z into guardian in the first place"

"I hate to say, I told you so~ actually I love saying it"

Seriously the nightmare king became some sorta icon in the second season

Zoey's face- I know she's mad. But it's really cute. You can see it between the bars when she fires em arrows. (I really like the concept of the bow though-)

"What did you do to my brother!"

That was- very forward

"Okay, you caught me. I'm not Mateo."

Oh. It worked! That was easy

"I'm better"

Oh- wow. Things just got bad

Izzie's "let me out" sounds so alarming and desperate. Maybe she's afraid of the dark? Or... confined spaces? Holes in the ground? ...okay. who wouldn't be afraid of random holes in the ground-

Also- they moved places? They're standing in a different place now

"Where are Izzie and Zoey?"

"Izzie's.. probably letting off steam somewhere. We saw how mad she was"

"No, no, Izzie is always there for her bro, especially when she's mad at him."

When did they get so close! I like it though

"Something's wrong"

✨Bonds✨

"Ugh- will you ever stop talking?!"

Love her tone

"I'm gonna slime your lips shut so you stop talking"

"Do you speak to your father with that mouth?"

(He knows- he knows~)

*a bunch of arrows*

(Also- different sound effects. Maybe- her emotions affect the music of her bow)

"That was adorable"

I agree Migo. Although you probably didn't mean it in the same way I mean it

"Your daddy will be so proud"

This he tone you use to speak with toddlers. Beautiful

Mateo's smirk flashing for like- a second

"I wish you were a big silent statue"

~Mateo smirking intensifies~

"Ready to get out of that cage?"

"Is.. this a trick?"

"You wanna stay in there? Fine-"

"Wait! Okay, I'll play along"

Mateo is a teenager. Look at him playing those dirty lil tricks

"Teo, what are you doing?"

"He's right!"

"Of course I am... about what?"

Why is he cute tho? Like- I can imagine him being a Migo now.

Takashiiiiiiiii whoooooo

Idk why I like him so much. He's a cute guy. I guess

Astrid could probably dance in that wheelchair. She dreams of being a break dancer or smth. ...oh great. I have a headcanon now. Yippie.....

(Logan- ughhhh Oh my god- Logans face... look at hat small sigh escaping his lips- ughhhhhhhh ship)

(Oh god- and Cooper- Cooper with that smirk... and the eyebrows- 🤣 Logan. I'm sorry to say but... you have a ship now. You are... linked to her. No going back. Not anymore...)

The girls swooning over Madeo- lol

Madeo has an odd eye. I don't think I noticed that before either. Or... did I forget?

Spiders- why's it got to be spiders..... (sorry. That's a different fandom- hold on)

Ohhh! Look at the bird Astrid dreamcrafts! So cool and pretty and-

Z-blob!!

Nightmare King is really funny. Look at him being all joyful like a kid.

"With power, comes purpose. To be a guardian you can't leave"

No- but this was really smart. Bever would've though of that... guess Mateo really is creative

Anyways- Z-blob!!!! Yayyyy

Our adorable loved green blob is back!

NH: "No-!"

Sniv: "like father like daughter, right boss? Breaking out of a trap-"

NH: "and headed straight into another!"

Look at the two supporting the Night Hunter. So cute.... aww..

And also we can see how much he does care about Zoey. Though it may be a wrong way to show it...-

Okay- but look at the design of Doomblob

Is that not sick? That is soooo friggin sickkk

"Call me crazy, but I think Izzie may have been right"

Ugh- finally Cooper!

"Bro, that's what I've been trying to say"

Logan I think it's your turn to give Cooper the smirk and the eyebrows thing.

"That is not out Mateo..."

Very smart mr. Oz. Verrry smart...

Did he just poke the bird?? Excuse- 😲

The fu-...

"Astrid!"

(Still reminds me of httyd)

Cooper! Stop with the- pudding or- whatever that is!

(That's the only recipe he knows- apparently... heh)

Astrid has a really pretty hourglass design. Look at it. Really. Go look at it. It's pretty. Take a closer look at it.

Also- the heck?? Did he just break her hourglass?? How do you repair that?

...is.. no one else concerned about Astrid... losing her hourglass? Maybe it is repairable? Maybe do the trial again? Or just.. make it?

Fillipo- oh my god, is that what they call Phil? Phil is much better. Though.. Fillipo is.. pretty fun

"Phil get back, Phil!"

And like- a long pause. But Phil was too shocked to move

The black effect to cover it- it made it so much cooler.

Mateo did a flip? Sorta thing??

Noooo Phil! Izzie keeps losing animal friends-

"Zoey, use your watch"

"I can't-!"

A lot of desperate screaming Izzie noises... (kind of annoying but-)

The gem on the staff, the portal thing sucking everything up, and the Never Witch laughing-...

Everything turned to crap all of a sudden- woahh

"How do you do anything without an hourglass?" (We got some lore? to unravel with Astrid now~) "should we wake up?"

Persevered? Hm... hmmmmm.....

"We'll be trapped in Castle Nocturnia-"

"Together!"

Not the problem here Mr. Oz! (This is some toxic relationship)

Too many things happening at the same time

Cooper really? Ah- uh.. okay.. yeah. That works.

"Zoey! You've got to reverse this!"

"I can't! I don't have my watch anymore"

And this is why you don't throw useful things away because you hold a grudge on the person that the item is connected to. If it's a good item and not too much of a overwhelming trauma? Keep it.

Mr. Oz is confused as F-

"Dad?! What are you doing here?"

So causal-

"Did she say 'dad?'"

Mhm.

"Well this day is chock full of surprises"

Am I right Albert? (Also. That was the first time Albert said anything in this whole episode. ???)

Z-blob!! Ahhhhhhhhh!

"Go help mateo get the staff"

"What about.. your dad"

They don't have anytime to... acknowledge stuff. Poor kids.

Nooo the pegasus alcorn whatever steed thing! (I guess I'm an animal lover?)

"Take this... there's enough time to save yourself"

Why is his voice so raspy?

"No, I don't want that thing. I don't want anything to do with you"

Really Zoey? Save lives first?! Hello??

"I have to save my friends"

With the watch!! Zoey!

The Never which! Oo look at her hair. Pretty

Oh- doomblobs body is in the shape of the cauldron

A rope! Finally! Cooper! Good job

Albert!! Noooo

"Mine! All mine! Forever!!"

She's also like a kid with tantrums.... kids shows I guess-

Eternal picture. Perfect scene

Really- I need to know her exact motives

"You're breaking it!"

"I know"

🥰

Cool weird blue light? I'm in.

I don't think Izzie was gone that late... shouldn't she have appeared.. much after?? Eh. Whatever we have a screen show limit thing-

The watch cracking- was awesome

No! Ziannnnnnnn

Why all the animals..... nooo

Too much happened at once.

"So um... look. I'm just gonna cut right through it. I'm inviting Astrid to our landing and I hope that's cool-"

"I really don't care as long as we stay together"

Omigod- they're like... already dating but kept it a secret or something- lol. They definitely had that plan for some time and was going to tell them eventually but then this happens-

They're like- so a couple already. What?!

Also you uh...

So.. uh.. you realize that- no adults? They're the only survivors? And... no.. science teacher? So when they wake up and go to school....

Izzie...

"Not like a real dream. But what it used to be and we'll wake up and then go back to sleep and Phil will be okay"

Actually. That wouldn't be half bad as an ending for this series. Just kidding-

"And I just wanna go back to the part where I don't remember anything"

Everyone is there for her... look at them...

Is Izzie going to have a similar thing to Teo now? Also. She must be really protective about her friends after this

Exactly Mateo! Do the speech! That... Cooper and Izzie has been repeating. Mostly Cooper though.

"It's up to us to take down the never witch. It always has been"

That- that's kinda sad...

"And nothings going to stand in our way"

Literally-

"Let's rock and roll"

Wow Zoey. Really? (It's cool. I like it- I'm not hating on it)

But it is pretty inspiring... welp. That's it. Thank you so much❤

Previous part

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Hello could I get a matchup from Jujutsu Kaisen and My Hero Academia please :) . My name is Sitara that means Star . Would prefer a matchup for the adult males in JJK and Pro heroes in MHA

Pronouns : She / her

Sexuality : Heterosexual , likes men

Zodiac : Aries

MBTI : ENFJ

Appearance : 5'7 ( considered tall by my friends ) . hourglass body. Thigh length long black straight hair , black eyes . Wheat brown skin. I have multiple aesthetics for clothing according to occasion like sweet girl , badass girl outfits , dark feminine , old money . But I try to look sexy while still being elegant . Big doe eyes , small nose and lips with chubby cheeks .

Personality : I'm very extroverted , I need people to match my energy . But I'm calm and reliable when I need to get a work done. Very independent and thus wants to take care of people I love. I respond very nicely to affection , I love it. Physical touch , words of affirmation , acts of service , gifts all are my love languages . I have many insecurities that people don't know despite them thinking I'm beautiful and intelligent ( Am I ? I don't know , I think I'm weird and have insecurities but I never tell anyone). I'm confident in my own abilities and kind of a leader and responsible person with a fun side too. People say I'm charismatic . I can understand other people's hidden side below their extroverted self so I comfort them and try to understand because I have feel them too. I can easily understand such people . Have many insecurities and trust issues but is willing to get over them for someone I love . I'm the life of the party , have many friends but I have small circle of close friends. I have a tendency to protect my loved ones and care for them even if I know they can. very calm and collected , don't loose my cool easily

Likes and Dislikes : I hate people who aren't loyal to their friends or partners . I'm very loyal to my loved ones but people think I'm a player , cheater , don't know why. I love to party and love dancing . I love songs that can make me dance but hate sad songs and slow songs ( unless I'm in a romantic mood ) . I love spicy food. I love to party where I can dance and go wild but i also like formal parties with elegant and expensive dinners. I can't eat or drink something very sweet. I love mangas and action movies or series . I also like Turkish and K dramas but not the ones that are too cheesy like It's Okay Not to be Okay and Vincenzo. I loved the female leads there. I love people who can return the same affection and love like me , who are clingy or touch starved because so am I and I can give affection to them. I love beaches and have a collection of swimsuits. Likes rap songs. I like poetry and i can compose nice ones . Chronicles of Narnia is my favorite and I also like Shadow and Bone. Fan of Digimon and Beyblade . Technology geek

Hobbies : I 'm trained in MMA and good at it. I love to dance . I 'm also good at horse riding and I can also play drums. I like driving cars and I also like to dress up. I like surfing too. Not good at cooking , just basic cooking knowledge for daily need . Good at academics . i do art too. I can also do Ice skating. Good at playing chess and polo. I also read books that are mystery and thrillers

Thank you : )

Hi Sitara! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took a while. I hope you like your matchups!

In Jujutsu Kaisen, I match you with...

Gojo certainly matches your extroverted energy. He’s able to keep up with you when most others wouldn’t be able to. But at the same time, even though he doesn’t seem like it, he’s certainly capable of stepping up and assuming responsibility when needed.

Your party buddy forever! Gojo likes partying and it’s even better when he’s with someone. He’s right there with you, dancing along to every good dance song that comes on.

Surprisingly loyal. While he may seem like someone who wouldn’t be loyal in a relationship at first glance, Gojo is going to stick by your side through everything.

He’s got some things in his past that mean he doesn’t want the people he cares about to think he doesn’t care about them. So he’ll reassure you that you’re the only one for him.

Not super touch starved, but at the same time, he’s not about to turn down affection. Just as he matches your energy, Gojo will also match your levels of affection.

If you give him a quick peck on the cheek, he’ll return the gesture. But if you run towards him before jumping into a hug, he’s holding you tight and swinging you around, laughing.

In My Hero Academia, I match you with...

Much like Gojo, Hawks is good at matching your energy. He’s a bit more relaxed than Gojo though, preferring to watch you than join in.

Great at helping you with your insecurities. Hawks has a silver tongue and knows exactly what to say to help you see the best in yourself. He just wants to help you see yourself the same way he sees you.

Hawks isn’t super into cooking either so you’ll probably be getting a lot of takeaway. Thankfully, he knows a lot of cheap and healthy places around town.

Ice skating dates! Hawks isn’t too bad at ice skating…just be prepared to see him fully extend his wings to try and maintain his balance. You better not be standing too close…

Hawks also loves going driving with you. He usually flies everywhere so driving is a nice change of perspective. I hope you don’t mind feathers getting all over you and the car though.

[moonctzeny]

love to hate me

request:  celebrity! jaehyun + enemies to lovers + “don’t you want to know how i feel?”

pairing: friends to enemies to lovers! jaehyun x female reader

genre: smut, angst, fluff... this fic has it all folks

word count:  7.514k

warnings: toxic behaviour, public sex, light restraining, jaehyun pulls a ‘white boy punching the wall’ at some point 

summary: “You and Jaehyun meet as SM trainees, developing a friendship until he debuts and you deicde to leave the company and pursue a solo career. When you reunite again in a music show and he acts like he barely knows you, you stubbornly begin a series of hate-brimmed sex rendez-vous. Your touch-and-go relationship continues on, until a song collaboration will force you both to deal with all your repressed feelings for each other”

a/n: this is the longest it has ever taken me to finish a fic.. I have a love-hate relationship with this (no pun intended XD). I hope whoever requested this likes it!

------------------------------------------------

Of-fucking-course you had to bump into him out of all people at the vending machine. All you wanted was a drink to refresh you before you got up on stage, and now you have to deal with Mr. Too Good For This World and his relentless teasing. His eyes, lit up by an amusement that was also evident in his smirk, stayed glued on your body, raking up and down at it for a second too long. Not that you didn’t like it.

“Stare much?”, you bark at him in hopes of snapping him out of his trance, and push through him to punch in the code of your favorite drink. But alas, he always had a comeback ready on the edge of his lips.

“You look ridiculous”, he states and you have to admit that your outfit, though fitting for the Halloween special of today’s music show, was way different than anything else he had ever seen you in. Reincarnated as Dorothy Gale for the night, your stylists had chosen a short, light blue checkered dress, with red stilettos that gave a sexy twist to the character’s ruby slippers. Hair neatly braided in two pigtails, decorated by ribbons and topped off by glittery pink makeup. The image of innocence. Jaehyun had to laugh.

“Says the man dressed up as Woody”

It was unfair, you admitted, how good he looked in that stupid outfit. His hair was gelled back, a few strands framing his handsome face strategically. The yellow shirt fitted him like a glove, its bright colour lighting him up as well. And those jeans, tight in all the right places, just melted over the muscles of his thighs. The ones that you’ve come undone on one too many times.

“So”, he lilts, giving you a once over before lowering both the volume and pitch of his voice, “want a ride?”

You scoff, sparing him an incredulous look, “on what horse, cowboy?”

He doesn’t reply, only points with his eyes to his crotch that is undeniably sporting a visible tent, and you gasp when you see the outline of his dick twitching under your stare.

“Jesus Christ, Jaehyun”, you mutter with a disgusted look on your face before picking up the almost forgotten beverage that the vending machine had barfed out for you. The boy mentioned, however, was unfazed.

“They don’t call me Woody for nothing”

Almost choking at the drink that was supposed to calm you down, you catch his eyes rolling at you through your third cough. Well, that ruins one of your favourite childhood movies. “Don’t pretend to be a prude. Now are we going to fuck before you get on stage of not?”

You can clearly remember the first time you met Jung Jaehyun alone. You always spotted him somewhere in the SM buildings, joking around with his future bandmates, barely ever without company. As a fellow vocal trainee, he introduced himself to you as Yoonoh, filling up the awkward silence while your vocal teacher prepared the music sheets for the both of you to rehearse.

You were thankful the two of you always got paired up together. Jaehyun was charming, easy to be around, funny. He was a model SM trainee with the otherworldly looks he possessed, almost impossible for anyone’s eyes not to follow him when he entered a room. Radiant porcelain skin, soft brown locks, and a dimpled smile that made your heart melt in seconds.

You can also clearly remember the first time you had the privilege of hearing him sing. Jaehyun had a beautiful baritone voice, one that contradicted his flower boy image but matched his manly personality perfectly. The four walls of the small practice room resonated with his sound, that was stable and smooth like honey. The lessons were challenging but Jaehyun made them bearable through spending time with him. Maybe it was your shared struggles, or how you were always tired and vulnerable when you saw him. Maybe it was those damned dimples, but your heart always beat faster when you were around him.

“Sometimes I get discouraged”, he confides in you in that same room, hours later, early into the morning now. The vocal lesson stretched on longer than expected, leaving you two sitting on the floor, sharing a cup of lemon-honey tea to soothe your vocal chords. You let your head rest to the leather couch behind you as you stare into his handsome features one by one. What time was it? Shouldn’t you be back at your dorms by now? It didn’t matter, this was one of those moments when time seems to stop and life seems unreal. When the only thing that you care about is the person standing next to you, and whatever it is they have to tell you.

 “I fear that I will never get to debut. There’s handsome guys all over the company. I just don’t know if my skills are enough.”  

You thought he was crazy for thinking that way, wanted to scream at him that he’s just perfect and more than enough for the company, or for anything in this world for that matter. But Jaehyun was reserved, the type to always mask his true feelings behind a smile and you were more than glad that he finally opened up to you, that he saw you as someone trustworthy. You didn’t want to dismiss his feelings, so you just pet his hair while you listened to his concerns.

 As you mindlessly gaze at the rainy weather outside, a couple of droplets following their own path down the froggy window remind you that time does run by. Even if every day seemed the same, following the same routine, going to the same classes over and over again.

Jaehyun had this sad look that contorted his pretty face and you hated it, reaching up to massage away the wrinkles between his eyebrows. You don’t know which godly creature made the hourglass of time freeze this moment, nor did you know why Jaehyun leaned forward to capture your lips into a kiss. Maybe it was his way of saying thank you for keeping your ears and heart open for him, for listening to him when he needed it most.

It felt so lovely while it lasted, two young people leaning on each other during an uncertainty that anchored them far away from their emotional shoreline. But life as a trainee isn’t a fairytale and falling in love can have serious ramifications. So you promise to each other that this will be a one time thing, and then you never speak of this night ever again.

Unsurprisingly enough, Jaehyun got to successfully debut, yet you didn’t have the same luck. The company had plans of focusing on their new boy group, thus postponing your debut for an uncertain amount of time. It was hard for you to decide to switch labels, to throw away the years of hope and dedication you had pinned on this company but the faith you placed on yourself was stronger.

It’s years later when you finally get to promote as a solo artist in a different company, and you are happy to say that the decision you made all those years ago was the right one. The exposure you got wasn’t the same as being in a Big 3 company, however leaving SM entertainment has its pros. Flexible schedule, less scrutiny, great creative freedom over your work. 

This wasn’t the first time you have come across your old trainee buddy. Jaehyun had multiple comebacks in a year, so it was only natural that his group’s and your promotions would sometimes overlap. You were only a rookie, and NCT turned out to become pretty popular, so of course the wins were always tied to their names.

The first time you walked past him in the hallways, dark makeup and professional styling making you both almost unrecognizable, you expected a wave, small talk, maybe some reminiscing of the old times. Instead, you got a cold stare or at best, an arrogant smirk coupled with a “Do better next time”. It was shocking to you how much Yoonoh, the boy with the shy smile and awkward social skills, would turn into such a stranger.

How you always ended up sneaking out with him to have a quickie in one of the ready rooms, was beyond you. He rushed you inside before checking both sides of the hallway, cautious to hide from any curious eyes. The coast was clear and Jaehyun doesn’t like to waste time, so he pins you against the door he just closed behind him, face dipped in your neck. You can feel his fingers dancing on the skin of your thighs, eager to explore what is hidden under your frilly skirt, and their delicacy in contrast to his feverish kisses sends a shiver down your spine.

One pretty whine from your lips, then two, three and you can feel Jaehyun smile deviously against your neck. The softness is too enticing for him to resist, so he nips at it skillfully, trying to get a reaction out of you. He recognizes that you have plenty of talent as a singer, yet the symphonies you sing out for him in those little sessions seem to be his favorite.

“Jaehyun, cut it out. I’m going on stage in like, 20 minutes”

“Turn me on then”

Wasn’t he the one that basically flashed you in the middle of the cafeteria for just existing? Isn’t it his hard on that digs against your lower stomach? The demand made you mad, and you wanted nothing more than to entice him with a nice blowjob, only to take a big, strong bite off that cock of his. But see, you had a full face of makeup on and your career is way more important than a fuckboy, so you’ll have to get creative.

Flipping him around so that he’s the one trapped between you and the door, you start to suck on his collarbones , then nibble at the tender flesh. He seems distracted enough by it so that you open the button of his jeans and fully remove his belt from their loops with no objections. Palming him over his boxers to keep him entranced, you manage to bring his wrists together, wrapping the leather around them, then lastly fastening them in place.

His eyes widen in shock when he realizes that he’s too late, wiggling his hands in a futile attempt to free himself. Your laugh is sadistic, making the hairs on his arms stand on edge and you gloat in the effect you have on him. 

Giving your palm a good lick, you form a ring with your fingers, wrapping them around the base of his member. He hisses and drops his head back, thudding loudly against the wall. His cock enlarges and reddens as you move your hand up and down, changing the pressure according to his reactions. Jaehyun isn’t one to express himself freely but there is not much he can do to stop the low moans leaving his lips. Not when you rub circles over his tip with the soft skin of your palm.

He looks so fucking good, all squirmy and desperate and trying to hold himself from saying ‘please’. You almost want to keep going, squeeze him more until he whines and begs to cum, and admire the white beads dripping from his slit and covering your hand. Almost.

You halt your movements with a last strong stroke, crossing your arms over your chest as you stare back at him. Jaehyun tentatively opens one eye to see why you have stopped, only to come across that bratty smile that he loves as much as he hates.

“You should have dressed up as a siren. Seducing people before they realize you are a man eating bitch”

“If you want someone to jerk you off you can go ask one of your little fangirls. I want to get fucked.”

“Let me go then. And you’ll wish you never did”

You scoff at his cockiness, nonchalantly freeing him from his constraints, and the way he immediately has a hold of your jaw reminds you of a predator eyeing its prey. His eyes have a crazy look in them, moving frantically over every part of your body like he can’t decide what to grab onto first. He decides on your hips, bending you over a table full of snacks and makeup tools and flyers of today’s schedule.

“You think it’s funny to tease me like that?”, he asks you with a peremptory voice that signifies you’d better shut up.

You hear shuffling behind you and assume it’s him slipping on a condom, so you make yourself more comfortable on the wooden surface. A hard slap on your ass jolts you alert.

“I asked you a fucking question”, Jaehyun presses brusquely and flips your skirt fully over your ass, pulling your panties down until they’re bunched up right over your knees.

“It’s fun”, you moan out, breathless both from the pleasure and the stinging feeling on your right cheek, “What are you gonna do about it?”

Was the room occupied by one of the artists that have already been on stage? Or will they barge in at any moment to find you bent over and pussy dripping for Jaehyun to finally dive inside you? He chuckled at the sight of you, eyes feasting off your naked body, your ass up just the way he likes it. Not so innocent anymore, huh?

He doesn’t reply to you, aligning himself against your slit and bottoming out in one go instead. Involuntarily, you let out a small screech, the sudden stretch catching you off guard.

“You better stay quiet, siren. Or maybe you would like it if people found us like this? Saw how good you take my cock whenever I ask”

You wanted to bite back at him, but the only sound you could make was a guttural moan. It was embarrassingly loud, and you fall forward to bite your fist and force yourself to shut up. It was effective, yet Jaehyun had other plans for you, pulling your pigtails towards him in a strong grip that has you against his chest in seconds.

“Nuh, uh, uh, siren”, he hums in your ear, his panting making his voice sound huskier and smokier than ever, “How about trying to stay quiet by using your willpower alone? That way it’s more- how did you call it? Fun.” 

He slows down his pace momentarily, as if he’s giving you time to answer him. But the moment you open your mouth to talk back at him, he thrusts particularly hard inside you, forcing a whimper out of your lips.

“Fuck you, Jaehyun”

“As you wish”

Jaehyun was conceited and cocky and a dick, but he was also a good fuck. He kept at it with what seemed like all the energy in the world, fucking you against that table until you came all over him, and your legs gave out. It ended how it always did, with him moaning how fucking sexy you look and how much he hates you, and you swallowing your pride as you swallow his cum. You’d tell each other to fuck off and never bother the other again, until you meet up at the next comeback, to do this shit all over again.

And that’s how things would stay if it wasn’t for that goddamn phone call from your manager.

“...so we thought what better way to promote your new song by recording a duet with NCT’s Jaehyun?”

No, no, no this can’t be happening. No way. Anyone but him.

“Are you sure this is the only way we can promote me? Can’t I just go to variety programs like every other idol out there?”

“y/n, duets by different group members are one of the most efficient methods of promoting there is! And with NCT’s latest song topping the charts this will be a great opportunity for you. Taemin and Sunmi did it. Suzy and Baekhyun, Chanyeol and Punch-“

“Alright, okay, I get it”

“Besides, since you used to be an SM trainee they specifically asked for you. The directors made some pretty big compliments on your work”

Isn’t it a little too late now? Not like they didn’t have the chance to debut you, right? That being said, there isn’t much to oppose to decline SM’s offer; your manager is right and you know it. Saying no to Lee Sooman and giving up a popularity push like that is basically career suicide. Nor could you let your manager know about your and Jaehyun’s little adventures, minutes before you have to go on stage.

“Just send me the schedule. I don’t have to record with him, right?”

“Oh no, they’ll record his part first and then they’ll send it to us. But there will be a music video of course”

Oh for fuck’s sake.

There was this little monster of worriedness that was screaming inside your head, refusing to shut up. This collaboration isn’t going to be easy, but you didn’t want to let Jaehyun’s pettiness get in the way of your career. Fumbling with your phone in your hands, you kept removing and reinserting its case compulsively, over and over again, until you mustered the courage to take matters into your own hands.You knew his number was buried somewhere in your contacts.

you [16:35]: hey it’s me, y/n

Jung Yoonoh [16:50]: y/n who??

you [16:55]: y/n y/l/n? the girl whose guts you were inside in last week? we have a song coming up 😒

Jung Yoonoh [16:57]: oh y/n right

Jung Yoonoh [16:58]: thought you’d have deleted my number

Well you sure have deleted mine, you murmur with your blood boiling, regretting reaching out to him in the first place. 

you [16:59]: i always hoard peoples contacts

you [17:00]: old habits die hard i guess

Jung Yoonoh [17:00]: like the habit of me being inside your guts?

You gasp out after reading his last message, hands awkwardly juggling your phone until you’ve forced yourself to calm down. After waiting for a while, until your face has reached its previous temperature, you feel focused again, and type out your original intentions for this conversation.

you [17:05]: this isn’t what i texted you about.

you [17:07]: we have this project coming up and while I know we aren’t exactly on the best terms, this comeback is very important for me

you [17:08]: and i don’t want to fuck it up

Jung Yoonoh [17:10]: kitty cat, relax. maybe this is a brand new word for you but i know what professionalism is

you [17:10]: don’t you ever and i mean ever call me that again

you [17:11]: glad to see we are on the same page

You didn’t expect a message back, nor did you get one. All you could do from now on, was pray that the promotions would go smoothly and Jaehyun wouldn’t do anything stupid that would jeopardize your collaboration.

------------------------------------------------------

And the day you dreaded finally came. The first day of filming for the music video. 

You had already finished recording the song, a bittersweet balad about two lovers who lost their way, only for their paths to cross again. When you listened to the demo for the first time, it only took three notes from Jaehyun’s pre-recorded verse to spread goosebumps on your skin. His voice was deeper and even more developed than you remember. Long forgotten memories, shoved deep inside your brain so as not to leave a bitter aftertaste in your mouth, came flooding up again. But things have changed since then.

The sky was crying rain and lightning, fitting to the storm inside your head. Normally you'd be excited to film a music video, bubbling with energy and unable to contain a smile. Today, all you could do was let your teeth abuse the cuticles of your left thumb, until little drops of blood ruined the fresh manicure you got for the shoot. 

Following your manager inside the studio, you take a quick glance at all the props the creative directors have prepared. They were very intricate, filled with all different types of flowers everywhere. Some of the fake rooms looked like classrooms, two others were decorated like teenage bedrooms. It was a lot more than you have anticipated.

“The song will be part of a drama OST, that’s why the budget is higher than usual”, your manager tells you as if he was reading your mind. 

He leads you to the changing room, where you try on different outfits your stylist has chosen for you, while simultaneously being briefed on the concept of the music video. It’s kinda cheesy and cute, with you and Jaehyun posing as high-school students falling in love. Certain scenes of the drama, whose plot matches the music video’s, will intercept in between.

You’re seated on the makeup chair, sunk in the uneasiness caused by your co-star. Jaehyun had arrived a few minutes after you, his bare face more handsome than you’ve ever looked in your most glamorous state and you can’t help but stare at him. He is all polite smiles and bows to the staff, and even gives you a formal greeting. 

You’re not sure why you just can’t bring yourself to stop your legs from shaking as the makeup artist patiently tries to apply a rosy blush on your cheekbones. It’s like you’re scared that everyone will see right through the both of you, somehow enter your brain and find out that you’re replaying your last encounter with Jaehyun in the music show’s waiting room in your head. As you try to read through his expression, to see if he’s nearly as nervous as you are, you defeatedly can’t decode what’s going on inside his head. Not like you ever could.

You glance at both you and Jaehyun through the mirror, admiring the youthful makeup. Blushy cheeks and innocent eyes of two teenagers in love, masking the raw lust between two nemesi. It couldn’t stray any further from the truth.

A staff member leads both you and Jaehyun (who is refusing to spare even one look your way) back to the main set. The director is passionately explaining what he wants to see from you in your first scene, but you can barely focus with Jaehyun’s eyes burning holes through your school girl outfit. You block him out and walk inside the ‘classroom’, spotting the cameras and sitting on your designated seat, while you wait for your signal to start.

Of course, you had acted before. Yes, you had expected for the director to ask you for some more intimate moments with your co-star. But when Jaehyun passed you a “love note” from the desk in front of you, looking all blushy and shy and with his dimples showing, you felt that the role of crushing schoolgirl became a little too easy for you to act out. 

And maybe, just maybe he was feeling the same way too. He looked pretty flustered when he saw you dancing across class, shifting restlessly in his seat when you bent forward to tie your shoelaces. Whether you did it on purpose or not, was a question your ego didn’t allow you to answer truthfully.

Most of the individual shots would be handled at a different shoot, so all you had to do was get over this one day with him. That’s what you repeated yourself over and over again. And you did pretty well, smiling charmingly at the camera, with the director praising you for your “innocent look”. You didn’t miss the scoff slipping from Jaehyun’s lips but you were good at ignoring it, focusing on getting through the different scenes in one-shot. 

You were currently leaning your body against the wall, playing with your hair while Jaehyun glances down at you, like a boy that is ready to confess to his first love. 

“y/n, I need you to give me something more shy, more bashful”, the director yells eagerly, but you can barely hear him, too focused on regulating your breathing. The look your co-star is giving you right now might seem loving and pure to the staff, but you know all too well the motives hidden behind his facade. It’s the calm before the storm, the silence he purposefully keeps to make you squirm, right before he whispers the most sinful propositions in your ears. 

Reading him like an open book, you stand still as he leans closer, just enough so that no one besides you get to hear his words.

“Come on y/n, can’t you act bashful? Or is it impossible for you to get embarrassed after getting fucked against the window of a TV station’s building?”

Clearing your throat, you’re suddenly hyper aware of every single sound and movement in the room. Suffocating, even in the light clothes you were wearing, and desperately trying to mute out his words that bring you back to the day he was repenting.

“When you were pressed up against that glass, moaning my name, all exposed for anyone that simply looked up to see, you weren’t too shy, were you?”

You raise your palm to wipe a bead of sweat that has collected on your temple, and breathe deeply through your nose, as if a good pump of oxygen would cool off the sudden heat between your legs. 

“Shut up Jaehyun”, you simply hiss through your front teeth, but he isn’t done yet.

“You know I can’t hold myself when I see you in skirts. So pretty. And you love to tease me in them too, I’ve noticed. Flashing me again and again until you get to suckle on my dick”

You were sure his voice was barely louder than a whisper, but the thought of anyone accidentally prying into your conversation had your whole body raising in temperature. The heat didn’t take long to reach your cheeks and you couldn’t remember the last time your legs felt like jelly, as they do now.

“Perfect y/n, that’s exactly what I’m looking for!”

You blinked back at Jaehyun a couple times, your mind trying to process that the director is cheering you on instead of scolding you to focus. The trembling hands, the fast-paced heartbeat, your big doe eyes. Though involuntarily, you had nailed the scene.

“You’re welcome”, Jaehyun mouths at you just as the staff announces a break. He scurries off to his dressing room without a word, as if he hadn’t just spewed his dirtiest of thoughts on set. It was almost as if he was daring you to follow him, but it’s not like he had left you a choice. You were fuming.

“Jaehyun”, you called out to him strictly but he didn’t acknowledge you, only walked further inside the small room with his name written neatly on the door. He was removing some of the heavier jewellery, rubbing the red lines they had left on his neck and wrist, momentarily catching your eyes on the mirror's reflection. They were misty, unreadable, and with how unpredictable you knew he could be, you decided to close the door behind you.

“Closing the door?”, he muses and in just a few long strides he has managed to trap you between his body and the wooden surface. It is reminiscent of your last meeting at the music show, and the memory of you tying him up doesn’t help with the organizing of your thoughts. “What are you planning on doing to me in here?”

You point one finger against his chest, not enough to create any real distance between you, but it comforts you nonetheless.

“What the fuck was that out there? What happened to professionalism?”

“Relax, kitty cat. I was just helping you act better”. His eyes stayed glued on your hips, once again making you all wound up and jumpy under his stare, “And it worked. You should be thanking me”

“I. Told. You.”, you started, tapping your finger on his sternum to emphasize each word, “Never call me that again. Today’s already hard as it is, why do you have to make it harder?”

He takes one more step towards you, his chest now touching yours and your hand that separated you lands involuntarily on his right peck. As if his presence wasn’t overwhelming enough, you feel a hardness pressing against your thigh, and for a moment you worry he can feel how wet you really are under your skirt. His voice is a low, a deep rumble.

“I don’t know. Why do you have to make everything so hard?”

“You are unbelievable”, you scowl at him and free yourself from his trap. You turn to the big mirror to avoid looking at him anymore, and you come to the embarrassing realization of how fucked out you look right now. You had to get out of there as soon as possible, before you do anything stupid and lose any trace of self control left in you. But not before you gave Jaehyun an earful.

“What I meant was that I am out there, being paid to be all lovey-dovey with you. This is not something easy for me you know. It’s basically prostitution.”

You catch Jaehyun’s eyes in his reflection, and for a fleeting moment they turn a colour that you hadn’t seen them in for a long time. Hurt? Disappointment? Whatever it was, it was gone in a second, replaced by that smile that made him both irresistibly smackable and fuckable at the same time.

“Did it cross your tiny brain that maybe someone could hear you? Staff leaks information all the time! If they found out we were fucking…”

“Were? Past tense?”

“Are. Will be. Whatever.” You sigh, defeated, hiding your eyes with your palms as you face him once again. “Like I said, this is important to me. So no more dirty talk on set. Okay?”

Jaehyun avoided your glance, from embarrassment or uninterest maybe. “Okay”

You continue to sit there silently, but your head is so occupied with a million thoughts that you don’t notice. How you will get through the rest of the shooting, whether your manager is looking for you or not, the coldness of the glass Jaehyun had pressed you against that day. The only thing that snapped you out of it, was him suddenly taking off his shirt.

“What are you doing?”, you ask panicking, but you can’t dismiss the pool of excitement in your belly.

“We have a wardrobe change after the break, remember? And since you refuse to leave my changing room..”

You clear your throat, trying your hardest to rip your eyes away from his abdomen, that you’ve so keenly marked with love bites before. His naked skin must have monopolized your attention way more than you realized, as you can’t remember when he slithered his way closer to you, towering over your height.

“Stare much?”, he almost growls, arousal dripping from his voice.

Every fiber of your being wanted to lurch forward, glide your fingers through his hair and start nibbling at those pretty lips of his. The sexual tension, amplified by the argument you just had, was filling the room like a thick liquid would fill a cup. One more drop, one more second of his staring and it would overflow. It felt so real, that you could feel that drop landing on your forehead. Then another one on your cheek, and that’s when you realized that what you felt was real.

“What the-?”, Jaehyun mumbles as he stares up at the ceiling, a big wet spot staining it and allowing the water drops to slowly wet his styled locks. As you start to put two and two together, someone knocks loudly on the door, making you both jump one feet away from the other.

“Get undressed”, a high-pitched male voice that you recognize as Jaehyun’s manager calls through the door, “the rain is ruining the set. It’s a wrap for today”

———————————————————————

A soft touch on your lower back, an even softer breath making your ears tingle. A tentative kiss on your neck that’s full of purpose and makes you shiver.

And then another touch, this time more south on your body. Fingertips grazing over your sensitive clit. Easily moving through your wetness and finally dipping inside of you. That baritone voice.

“This pussy is mine, isn’t it, kitty cat?”

You look up to meet the face of the familiar voice, only to meet Jaehyun’s baby brown eyes. The pleasure was enough to make you ignore the despised nickname, flowing intensely through your body. You let out a desperate moan, gripping his arms to keep your balance. His fingers are now dragging through your walls and you clench around them instinctively, confused but enamored by his touch. You are falling apart.

“Jaehyun? What are you doing?”

“I want to make love to you”

“Love? But you hate me”

He plants another kiss on the slope of your neck, his hands picking up in pace and making you feel like you’re floating on air.

“Love. Hate. Is there really any difference when I’m here, ready to please you? Willing to make you feel things you have never felt before?”

“You already do”, you admit, only seconds away from your orgasm. The bliss is so close you can almost taste it, but for now you choose to taste his lips. They are so soft and warm that you realize you haven’t kissed Jaehyun since that night at the practice room. How you miss him. Not the group visual, not the idol, not even Jaehyun. Yoonoh.

“Yoonoh”, you moan out against his lips as the pleasure overtakes you, a low buzz humming in your ears, “mmm yes, Yoonoh”

“Who the fuck is Yoonoh?”

You finally wake up, your manager shaking you awake being the first thing you see. The sun’s morning rays are peeking through your blinds, warming your skin in lines. Your phone’s ignored alarm clock is still buzzing on top of your nightstand.

“No one. I’m awake, thanks”

Fuck. That makes it what? The fourth night in a row you dreamt about him?

“Get, up. Quickly. We’re late”

You groaned at the banging of your head that was caused by you getting up so fast. It was early into the morning, as you had to get ready for the mv’s second shooting day. The heavy rainfall wouldn’t allow for the filming to continue for another week, yet aided your growing anxiety of having to encounter Yoon- Jaehyun again. 

You felt a little stupid, like a kid that goes to middle school for the first time, anxious but full of butterflies in your stomach in the thought of seeing him again. You weren’t sure who the anger, that came with the inability to control the fresh feelings bubbling from your dream, should be directed at. Your manager for booking you this job? Jaehyun for making it his goal to have you dripping wet on set? You, for letting it all affect you so much?

You decide on the former, giving your poor manager the cold shower for forcing you to deal with the problems you’ve caused yourself. Checking your phone, you realise that you are, indeed, late, and wonder how quick you’re going to have to make your morning shower.

“Is Jaehyun and his team there already?”, you ask your manager as nonchalantly as you could, feigning mildly interested in his answer.

“Oh, they didn’t tell you? The other team asked for the shootings to continue separately”. You felt your stomach drop all the way down to your condo’s basement. And the icing on the cake: “Jung Jaehyun’s request”

Maybe your manager wasn’t as clueless to your electricity, or maybe it was your sudden impulse to pluck every loose thread of the pyjama top you were wearing that made him sense the discomfort following what he’d just said. He plops next to you on your bed, boards creaking in the silent room and you feel his rough hands patting you on the back.

“I’m sure he had an overlap in schedules and needed a break, nothing to do with you”

But you knew better, and you knew your palms wouldn’t stop itching unless you picked up your fucking phone and sent him a message. 

you [06:30]: i heard you can’t make it to set today. everything ok?

You wish you never did. The radio silence from his number was way worse than any insult, any form of teasing he could give you on set. You even tried calling him, desperate for an answer, a closure even. Maybe he was busy. Maybe the shooting took longer than expected. Maybe he wasn’t avoiding you; one of his managers uploaded his latest story on his instagram, not him. Maybe at the end of the week he would get back to you.

------------------------------------------------------

Going to his dorm unannounced was not a good idea. Waiting for someone to open the door for you, you hope his members will recognise you from your trainee days, or those rare nights Jaehyun sneaked you in when you were both lonely and in need of a… well, whatever you two were.

You’re starting to worry that whoever saw you from the peephole thought you were a sasaeng and called security, when Mark opens the door. His eyes are wide open behind his glasses, clearly not expecting you and immediately yelling for his ‘Jaehyun hyung’.

Soon, the called male arrives at the apartment’s entrance, annoyed for being interrupted from whatever it was he was doing. “What is it, me and Jungwoo are watching the season fina-“

As if Mark suddenly turned invisible, Jaehyun walks right past him, grabbing you by the wrist and dragging you to his room without another word.

Jungwoo, engrossed with the aforementioned show’s season finale on his computer screen, tries to cover up his naked torso in panic when he notices you. 

“Get out.”, Jaehyun orders him, and the younger man knows that his tone is not one to be argued with. It triggers the cold sweat that makes your clothes stick closer to your skin and forces your heartbeat to quicken, pumping blood all over your body. The door closes, leaving you both alone with only the sound of Jungwoo’s laptop still playing in the background. A lighthearted scene that is too oxymoronic against the tension that is just palpable at this point. What the hell were you thinking coming here?

“What the hell were you thinking coming here?”, Jaehyun speaks your thoughts out loud, and you wince at how empty your head is with excuses.

“Are you ignoring me?”

“What?”, he asks dumbly, hoping you would avoid asking again.

“Was it that hard to text me back? Am I such a waste of your time?”

Jaehyun seems angry at your confrontation, his bad mood escalating with every word that is leaving your mouth. He still avoids to look at you, toying with some plushies and decorations next to his bedpost. You realize you never had time to really notice them, barely recognizing them. You always entered the room blindly, pressed up against Jaehyun’s body and with his lips all over your neck, then left as soon as the sex was over. His apathy was infuriating.

One by one, you start to remove all of your outerwear, dropping your clothes on the floor until you’re left in only your bra and jeans. Jaehyun stares at you incredulously, then at the pile of clothes on the floor, unable to make out the reasoning behind your impromptu stripping.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting naked. Seems to be the only time you can actually pay attention to me.”

You reach for the buttons of your jeans, only able to unzip it halfway before Jaehyun has you pinned against the wall behind you, his fingers cool and pressing lightly against your neck.

“I-I fucking hate you!”, he cries, punching the surface to release some of the steam, and lets go of the hold on your neck almost completely. How tempted he is, to just fuck your right against that wall, pour out his anger by pouring out his cum inside you, then ignore each other like you always do.

It’s the easy thing to do, keeping the toxic circle going. All barking and fucking and no real problem gets resolved in the end. He wouldn’t even call a cab for you, preferring to be hated for something he wasn’t than to be rejected for showing the real him. You would still have no idea about his feelings towards you, going around saying how awful he was while asking for a round two. But Jaehyun was tired.

“Can’t you tell that I am trying to distance myself from you?”, he sighs and it’s the first time you’ve ever heard him sound so emotionally exhausted.

“Why do you dislike me so much? We used to be friends and then one day you-“

“Friends? Just friends?”, he interrupts you with a chuckle and a sarcastic puff through his nose, and you shake your head.

“If you also think that what we had was more special than a common friendship then why act like you don’t know me?”

“You were the one who wanted to ‘forget about anything happening and never telling a soul about it’, remember?”

“I thought we came to a mutual agreement! I was just trying to save our careers and it worked Jaehyun, you got to debut and I-“

“And you just threw away everything we had like it was the easiest thing to do! Do you ever want to know how I feel, y/n? First you want nothing to do with me, left the company without even saying goodbye. Then I try to forget about you, become an asshole to keep you out of my life and suddenly you want to jump my bones. One day you just play blind to everything, asking for professionalism and now I’m the one ignoring you? What the fuck do you want? A fuck buddy? A professional? A friend?”

“I want you, Yoonoh. Fuck, I just want you”

You’re not sure which one of you initiates the kiss. His lips are as plump and kissed as hard as you recalled, a couple of tears staining your cheeks that you didn’t realize you were holding back. It felt so right, the way his head pushed and pulled away from yours, always inviting you back to him. One hand was situated over the dimples of your waist, the other lost between your hair, untangling it gently. You decided to lay yours over his heart, feeling its tempo and calming yourself down.

You kiss for what seems like an eternity, so drunk in bliss that you can’t remember how you made it through life without Jaehyun’s taste all over your tongue. When he pulls away from your lips, you almost whine, but his fingertips dabbing at the soft skin of your cheeks feel just as comforting.

“I don’t want us to be like this anymore”, you whisper to him and he nods encouragingly, holding you even closer. “I’m sorry for not reaching out to you all these years ago, I just thought ‘What would a brand new idol want to do with a failed trainee like me’-“

Jaehyun brings your fingers to his lips, kissing all your knuckles one by one and you think you’re gonna burst at the seams. “You weren’t a failure, you were the best thing to happen to me back then”. His voice is so sincere that you don’t dare question the veracity of what he’s saying and you let him continue. “When I saw you again I was so bitter, I decided to turn off my feelings. I think I get too comfortable in that role. I put it on for me, my members, my fans even”, he stops then, laughing sadly, “it’s how I finally got you”

It was your turn to open up his eyes to the truth, holding his face between your hands and admiring its beauty. 

“That’s not true. I kept staying because I knew what was hidden behind all that armor. I guess, the sex was the only way to get closer to you”

“Not because I’m good?”, he jokes, wiggling his eyebrows and you can feel his dimples forming under your fingers.

“Eh, you’re pretty good too”

He starts pecking your neck, his smile obvious in his kisses and you squeal when he lifts you to his bed. Bouncing on the hard mattress, you let him lay his body weight over yours as he gives you a million traces of his love. 

“So, I’m guessing this means we start over?”, he asks reluctantly as he emerges from your half naked body and you hold back from cooing at him.

“I thought you loved to hate me?”

“I think I hate it, but I love you”

[onyxheartbeat]

Dear HIM/Ville Valo fans,

this is a long post but I must discuss this.

________

I came across this interview of Kat Von D from a few days ago. Before I get into my thoughts, below is a passage from her old book “Go Big or Go Home” which you may or may not have read. She wrote about Ville:

________

“I only knew his music, and I loved it on first listen. It was dark and it was beautiful. It was metal and it was poetry. It was love loaded into a gun, and I wondered about the man behind the songs.  Two years later, our paths crossed, and like the majority of the connections I’ve made in life, tattooing brought us together. Through our first tattoo sessions, we began to get to know each other. For the next few years, I just thought of him as my friend from overseas, and that was all. Then, after knowing him for six years, something changed. It could have been the wine, the music, or the moon. Most likely it was just perfect timing. Just one kiss, and he changed my world. We were both sad back then, and lost. I was depressed, having finally ended a marriage that had been doomed from the beginning. I was also dealing with the pressures of filming a television show, which was totally new to me - and drinking my way blindly through it all. His story mirrored mine, and he had been feeling just as low. We had been waiting for something to happen, for someone or something to come along and save us from ourselves. And when it suddenly seemed that that someone was each other, it took us both by surprise. We shared darkness, and doing that bought light back into our somber worlds: for once, we didn’t feel alone.He’s the reason why I wanted to write music to begin with - and learn to sing. I remember the exact moment I made up my mind about making music. It was something I felt I needed to do, not for any reason other than a way to respond to him. It didn’t matter if the songs I’d write never saw the light of day, as long as he was able to listen to my music, my message to him. He had told me to look for a package at my door step, prefacing the delivery of the contents, his new album, saying, “These are all of the things that are easier sung than said.”I knew what he meant, but never imagined that each song would be filled with direct messages to me. I put the album on, and the music rushed out of the speakers and filled my house. His voice rang all around, making it’s way to the core of my heart with every word he sang. As cryptic as those lyrics may have been for anyone else, I knew exactly what each word meant and recognized every event and place he referred to. The songs were so beautiful, I just wished so badly that he could have said everything out loud just once to me. How should I respond to something like this? Where do I even start?The first time I saw him after I got sober, he was in town working on music. We sat in my office at the shop until the late hours of the night, talking and catching up about everything - music, home, art and work. Did we talk about love? No. We constantly danced around our past instead. What happened to us? I couldn’t find the courage to ask because I was scared of the answer I already knew. We decided to draw, with pencils and paper in front of us, we sat at opposite ends of the table. He pulled my three-minute timer from one of the nearby shelves, and placed it at the center of the table. He suggested we draw each other, and I was game. With a flip of the hourglass, the grains of sand moved from one vessel to the other, and we began.Sketching these timed portraits forced us to stare at each other, making it practically impossible to focus on the drawing itself. I had almost forgotten how beautiful his face was. He has a combination of eyes, lips, and a darkness to his looks that makes him look almost otherworldly. With him, I felt like I was at the center of an orderly, tranquil, magnificent universe. For those short three minutes, there were no questions about life or purpose. It was as if we never needed any more from each other than this.Like all people, I’ve suffered from love sickness and tasted the pain of love. The theatrical director of my mind, the one who staged all these versions of him and my life with him, seemed to be unaffected by reason. I was finding myself constantly day dreaming of the past.His eyes, his hands, his crooked smile - I’d ruminate over his features. Things he said. Things he did. Things he wrote. Things he drew. Things he sang. Over and over again, I’d sift through these images and memories as if they somehow contained the answer to my prayers. But I was living with a long-age memory of him; living so far away from the present moment.If we had spoken about what we were or what we thought we were, back when we got sober, I wouldn’t have been so confused, wandering what if, and writing the rest of our story in my mind. What did I expect? For him to magically not hear about me being in a relationship? And to not be bothered by it? If only he would have asked….. I would have….. If we could have only talked….. then things would be….. if we allowed ourselves to transform our fears of being open, vulnerable, then, I’d convince myself, we would be together. I realized that none of that mattered now. If I wanted to be free of this unrequited longing, I would have to make peace with the past and finally let it go. There was no way around it. But did I want to be free of it? - and him?I listened to one of his songs the other day. Out of all the songs he wrote on that album, this one was the most direct. He sings my name in the chorus. By the time the song is over, I’ve felt a range of emotions - I’m sad but happy, frustrated but calm. He sings about how I alone bring him to a place of stillness and peace within when we are together. What a victorious feeling - to enter into a place with him where no one else has been. To be able to bring goodness to and draw it out of someone. Those sweet thoughts were interrupted by  an e-mail from him. Impeccable timing as always. It’s just a short note, letting me now he’s somewhere out there, thinking of me. He ends the message by calling me “Star Face” - his pet name for me from long ago that no one else uses. At that moment, I loathe him for it. I loathe him because I love him. Sometimes it feels like it would be so much easier to walk away from this if he’d just tell me that he hates me, that he wants nothing to do with me. But instead he calls me “Star Face.” There is no way he doesn’t know what he’s doing. He’s not letting go, either.‘Ultimately, it is the desire, not the desired, that we love.’The silver plane hurtled over Newfoundland, over the Labrador sea. Someone told me I might see the northern lights as I fly east and north, but I wouldn’t have noticed as I was deep in writing the letter that I had already mentally composed long before I decided to make this trip to see him over New Year’s Day. I didn’t have to edit myself this time, I knew exactly what the letter would say.I reread the note to myself before sealing the envelope. Then I drew out the first letter of his name in pencil on the front. What a beautiful letter it was, probably my favorite out of the entire alphabet. A letter I was so used to writing myself. With ease the swirls and curves of each arch seemed to flow from my heart, my mind’s eye, drawn in and through my arms to my hands, releasing themselves onto the pale ivory paper envelope. My plane landed soon after.I had missed this country, I had missed him, too. I wondered how time had treated him ,for it had been a few years since I had last seen him. I wondered if I still had the ability to quiet his heart when he was feeling manic. He always said I had a way of doing that when I was near. And I wondered if he even needed me in that way anymore.When we met up, he looked just as beautiful as the day we saw each other for the first time, almost ten years before. And as if no time had passed, we started right where we left off - hours flew by in the comfort of each other’s presence. Talking. Catching up.He asked if I was getting sleepy, and my attempt at concealing the tiredness was transparent. I looked at the clock; maybe it was the jet lag or the clock hands pointing to midnight, but I knew it was time to say good-bye. Reluctantly, we both stood up and tried our best to part ways. As good as it felt to be near him again, I gave him the letter I had written letting him know that I was letting the nation of us go. He took the sealed envelope, and then I watched him walk away for what I assumed would be the last time.My heart didn’t belong locked up in a tower across the ocean from my home. It belonged in my chest, beating, living, feeling, sometimes hurting, but always loving. I deserved to be free, and understanding and needing that more than a dream, I was finally able to let him go.”

_________

Now, let me start by saying, I’ve never understood this and I still don’t. I’ve had that passage saved in my drafts for years because I keep almost anything pertaining to Ville. 

I’ve been a HIM fan since I was about 15 years old, and have followed Ville’s life and work closely. The friendship between them was always apparent to HIM fans in those days, because we saw her in photos with the band often. I used to watch Miami Ink and LA Ink as regularly as pretty much anyone in those days, and I remember when this particular passage of her book was brought to light, the HIM fan base read it and we all had our thoughts. We were all aware of Screamworks being written about Kat (it’s obvious in the lyrics of the album) even though Ville never specifically said Kat’s name when asked about it in interviews.

I remember being baffled back when we as HIM fans discovered this passage from the book. I couldn’t imagine not making that relationship work if it was true love. I’m a bit biased because I adore Ville and he’s like a dream to me, but I just couldn’t understand it. It seemed like she took the relationship for granted or she didn’t love him enough to make it work; but I digress. I get it; love and relationships are complex.

Still, flash forward to this recent interview (the screenshot), she says it was unrequited love, and I’m still not understanding it. Why release all the songs now? Why didn’t she make it work if it was true love? Who is she trying to say was the one not reciprocating (as the word “unrequited” suggests) in the relationship? I don’t understand any of it. More than anything, I’ve had so many questions that I wish I could ask Ville about it all because he only spoke briefly about it all, and it was always rather cryptic. 

I’m only writing this as a HIM fan, and because I love Ville and his lyrics on Screamworks so, so much (it’s an extremely underrated album in the HIM discography, in my opinion) so I’m letting any fellow HIM lovers know she wrote an album in response to it, in case you’re interested. I haven’t followed Kat or her work in many years, so I don’t know what to make of all this, but it’s always been extremely apparent to me when listening to Screamworks that a lot of heart went into it and even pain, not that his lyrics on other albums aren’t like that too, but I felt it more on Screamworks. I feel that Ville was the one who was truly heartbroken.

You all probably know from following my blog that I’m obsessed with love and unrequited love. Any romantic stories, bittersweet letters, heartbreak, longing etc. is just my favorite thing in the world so please excuse the long post, haha.

[dynananarmy]

REPUTATION|| Min Yoongi

Summary:

You were in the top. There was no person in the world who didn't know your name, either for your success or your reputation, believing that the only thing you should do is smile, be a good girl, don't force your opinions on people, and NOT for any reason deny the dating rumors. But then a gummy smile and a sweet accent came to change all your believe system, from a friends with benefits to falling in love, you encounter a new fear: would he love you despite your reputation

Pairings: Idol!Min Yoongi(SUGA) x singer!reader   

Warnings: distorted body image and unwarranted fear of gaining weight. Unhealthy habits like starvation, underage alcohol consuption. Mild smut and age gap (Yoongi is 25 and reader is 20) but everything is consensual). If i miss something please let me know.

Gorgeous

You should take it as a compliment That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk You should think about the consequence Of your magnetic field being a little too strong And I got a boyfriend, he's older than us He's in the club doing, I don't know what You're so cool, it makes me hate you so much

You make me so happy, it turns back to sad, yeah There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have Guess I'll just stumble on home to my cats Alone, unless you wanna come along, oh

Anxiety was a familiar feeling, a daily occurrence even before you knew how to call it. The constant fear of making the wrong move, not filling everybody's expectations. But it never gets easier, walking a red carpet was nerve wracking at 20 like it was when you were 13, but expectations were higher, every single album need it to be different, different  sound, different style, you need it to be more mature but not to sexy because then you were to provocative for kids who follow you, but not to demure because then you are a prim. And then, you were too fat, and then too skinny, or you would have the nice flat stomach that people expect but you didn't have the hourglass figure. So everything you stand in an outfit risky enough for you, you would shake like a leaf, praying that the apple and the water that you had eaten would not somehow make you look bloated. That you contour was blended, that the powder under your eyes would not flash in camera. 

You were about to promote your second single of your album, a song who was for a ex manager and ended up seeing as a call out for war for a singer whom you were friends but ended up splitting ways when she started dating an ex boyfriend, an ex boyfriend that you don't actually love but it was still awkward going out with the new girlfriend of your ex. Your team takes it as publicity, even if there was not an actual feud, good or bad, publicity is publicity, and so the music video only seems to spark even more fire. Still you invited all of your friends, friends that you met through other friends, in fashion shows or while performing in lingerie runways, the kind of friends that you partied with in your mansion in Coney Island or the one in Malibu. But that only sends a spark of worry, appearing in a music video with models with perfect bodies only makes you even more insecure about your own, and you were scared about what people would think about it.

A tug in your arm pulled you out of the dazed of the camera's flash and your thoughts, Calum King was a producer, a handsome embodiment of masculinity, a strong build body, a short beard, barely there but enough to let you know that he was a man. He was older than you by a lot, not enough to be scandalous but enough to raise a few eyebrows.

 He smile and you copied and hold his arm to the cameras, the lady assisting the red carpet gesture you to move and once you were out of the sight of the camera you let a shaky breath a pound in the head and the emptiness of your stomach make you feel dizzy and your publicist move quickly, holding a hard candy to you.

“Are you okay?” Calum asks, still holding you, you nod immediately and put the candy in your mouth.

“I´m good, the lights make me feel light headed but nothing that a little bit of sugar does´n fix” you say tasting the candy, feeling a little bit less tired, he nods but his sight was already far away from you. 

“Baby, i´m going to say hello to a few friends, I¨ll see you in our seats, okay?” He doesn't wait for an answer, his manager following behind, you let a sigh of relief, relieved that you don't have to keep pretending anymore, Calum and you met a few months ago while visiting a friend of your to the studio, a paparazzi saw you having coffee and after that you kept seeing each other, he would be your date in events and to the world, you were official, but you didn't even be intimate,barely hold hands while walking in the streets, or kiss each other more than a few pecks when winning a prize, but even that, it felt forced. Your publicist looks away from her phone to look at you and gives you an indifferent look.

“A new korean band is in here, apparently they are very famous and are contending against you for one of the awards, maybe you should go and see them so people see that you support new talents”

Curiosity sparks within you  “Korean band, is it BTS?” you asked, sipping your water you publicist arch an eyebrow

“Yes, did you know them?” she looks rarely interested, you nod reminiscing how  a few weeks ago you had stumbled on a fan edit of you and one of the members titled “1997 golden babies” seeing the dark haired boy dancing and performing with that much passion caught your attention, looking at his name and thus his group, fascinated enough that you had expend a few hour looking at the music videos and some of their performances, a bubble of excitement grew in your stomach making you feel energized again and you started to walk knowing your publicist was going to take you to them, skipping to some people you got to the corner where a group of at least 10 men stand, you immediately felt short and tiny and intimidated but you put your confident face and wait for your publicist to talk with one of the men, who yo assume was their manager, he look surprised and his gazed fall to you where you standing sandwiched between your bodyguards, he nod and went to say something to the remaining men 7 of them wipe their heads instantly to you and you smile, you make the remaining and they scatter in formation, pushing the taller men in front, he gives you a smile and flashed with a set of dimples.

“Hii, is so nice to meet you guys” You break the ice, you scanned every single one of them, from the tall broad shoulder one to Jungkook, the one of the edit and then your eyes fall to one of them, instantly draw for the way he looks at you, like he knew something your eyes goes back to the taller guy as he start to talk.

“It's so incredible to meet, we are big fans of your music” he says, you had heard that a lot but he sound genuine and the rest of the boy nodded, your eyes went back to the guy with the feline eyes and you see something that you had seen before but rarely from another artist, admiration, but also understanding, like he understanded something and he was fascinated by it. 

“Are you performing tonight?” you asked trying to shake the feeling that he was reading you like a book he understands the language. 

“Ummm, no, not tonight, hopefully someday”  he looked a little ashamed but that only made you feel more admiration for them, they are escalating little by little.

“Id watched some of your performance” a chorus of ¨whoas¨ breaks their silence and you smile wider “You would have made us look like kids beside you, you are truly amazing” you compliment, the words flooding with ease, all of them let a ¨thank you¨ and when you meet eyes with the feline eyed boy he gives you the most beautiful and shy gummy smile, something inside you felt warm and fuzzy and you enjoy it so much that you wish it never went away. Your publicist asked for a picture and you stand with them.

The flash was quick, you changed the pose and at the same time you felt a delicate brush of fingers in your back. Tingles run down your spine and your hair stands, how was it possible that a man could make you feel that way without talking, without knowing him? You didn't even know his name, or how he was, he could be an asshole. 

The camera stop flashing and the warm fingers leave your trembling body (you didn't know if it was of starvation or the adrenaline running through your veins) You look at him, the man with the gummy smile, cat-like eyes and the rose petal lips, he bow and you did the same as a reflex, that make him smile fully and the giddy, warm feeling bubble in your stomach all the way up your chest. You broke eye contact and with warm cheeks you went to hug the taller guy hugging all of them (not without almost melting in gummy smile boy, and breathing deeply his mainly citrus smell).

Your entrance was cut out by your manager, who led you backstage and you hope you bump into them, to talk to him, to hear him and let his fingers pay with your skin, but you were immediately trap in the changing room pulling other set of clothes and when you get out your publicist was waiting with a mint and a glass of ice you chew while letting the makeup artist  retouch your makeup.

You had already stood up 5 times to receive an award and Top Social Artist was the last nomination before going to change for your performance. Sitting on the front row with Calum on your side being the perfect supporting boyfriend and with Zendaya on the other side beside her a bunch of other models friends, big names in the industry who appeared in the music video that had already premiered a few awards ago. And although you should've be worried if you would win the category you were already seeing black spots, nausea and heavy eyelids accompanying, and sitting beside with the most beautiful, tallest, slimmest, women of the moment didn't make you feel better, you could barely hear anything but the sound of blood pumping through your ears but after hearing your name and the loud cheers of your fans a smile appear in your clammy face, you wonder if you could even stand to get  the award if you win, a louder cheer broke in the arena and looking to the screen you saw the south korean band announced and when it disappears it took a few seconds for the screams to stop, the announcers opened the envelope, two seconds of silence in the speakers and then...“BTS!” You jump clapping finding strength out of nowhere and with a smile you saw the band walk in front of your eyes with wide eyes, open mouth and smiles, a single hand sticking out for you and knowing who it was you brush his hand with yours. 

Then you turn back and with a bodyguard in front and another in your heels, you walk into the main stage of the arena. 

Everything was blurry, you followed the guard into the hallway and crouched to get in the elevator, holding the mic and letting your head go over the choreography. And when the voice in your in ear says “one”you feel the lift move and stand.You felt like you were going to faint, but still make your moves as smooth as possibly, it felt like forever but when you give the final move and look at the camera you give the most convincing smile ever. Wait for the count to end and the light to ade out to let your body fall to the ground. But the light did not fade, and the camera was still on you. 

The host appeared to your side to announce that your music had already broken a record and that you had won another 2 awards. You accept the award and let the host hug you and unintentionally your body stumbles, your eyes give a turn and feel almost lost conscious.“It's okay” you said to the man and pulled out with a smile, looking to the worried crowd,”It's okay” you repeat in the mic ” I very excited, to be here and to win this awards, thank you to everybody that make this possible, my fans, my family, my team, everybody that listen my music and the art i make, thank you so much, i love you” You said, making well rehearsed words leave your mouth, you leave following the lady with the awards, numb. 

The act seemed innocent and so quickly and random that nobody should have noted, but it set something, pieces clicking in place, for you felt illicit, scandalous, it ignited something that you have never let your body cave in, lust. A sin so impure that only thinking about it makes you flustered, but it only took a couple of glances, some brushes of skin and a hug for you to continue the seduction game he started. And you wanted him to win, to ditch all the circus and let him take you to the hotel, seeing him all in black contrasting with his soft creamy skin, a fallen angel.  

Wanting to feel something, did you deserve the awards? Your music had moved so much from your original goal that  you barely felt it was good. So you didn't feel proud, and you did not feel happy, or sad, or angry. You felt hungry, and tired.

 How dare he be so cool? With the glinting earrings and the necklaces and the deep voice and side smile, a dream, you never thought he was just your type. Was it possible for you to have him? A quick internet research let you know his name, his position on the group and his age, he was a little over five years older than you, younger than your “exes” but so much different, he felt real, a real man, but at the same time he was surreal, to perfect,  to gorgeous. And you wanted to know all about him.

You sit alone in the buffet of your hotel, with other people who also went to the awards, munching on a chicken salad with some delicious sauce and bread sticks and a glass of orange juice. Your orange juice, of course, was spiked with alcohol by your manager, a way to make you last giggly and awake for the rest of the night. Feeling already full with your second plate and with already a certain amount of alcohol in your system, you felt better, enough to keep looking at the table in front of you. Where 7 boy sit holding a camera laughing at one of them knocking the glass with the camera gummy smile boy who had, just like you, been looking at you smile with you and you hold the big stack of tissues at him, he walk to you and brushing fingers he take it from your hands “thanks” he said with a deep voice, one that you had already heard in his music videos but never compared to the real thing.

It took you 30 minutes to shower, dry your hair, put light makeup and a flowy black dress, that fall above your knees, do a quick google research of what to expect at losing your virginity and chugging the mini bottle of wine of your mini fridge, cleaning all of the clothes on the bed and quickly fix it. And when you thought that he wouldn't come a knock was heard. You look for the last time in the mirror and open the door.

 And he was there, his hair now completely straight  and soft looking and his face was bare, no necklace and simple cotton shirt and black cargo pants. Like he couldn't be more gorgeous.  Oh wait, he could, looking at you with the damn smile. “Hi” you said, already losing the game “Hi”, deep voice and cute accent, you can't help but giggle, boozing  alcohol in your veins.

“Please, please come in” You open the door all the way “ I´m y/n, by the way” you said and he looks at you, “I know, I´m Yoongi” he says laughing “I know” you respondHe lifted an eyebrow “you do?” he said with a smug smile, “of course i know, i'm not that  dump to hook up with a guy i don't even know the name of” you widen your eyes and blame the alcohol by your blunt remark, but feel relieved when he laughs. He let you lead the way to the living room and when he sits on the couch he notices the object on the coffee table, an unopened copy of BTS 'latest album you had.

They said goodbye and you broke contact, gulping the last of your orange juice and immediately got replaced, you looked back at your manager and publicist, talking to their manager, using the translator that look flustered, and you knew why, after yourself had talked with your manager about your request, voice confident but cheeks flushed, your manager didn't even had to approach BTS manager before he was already on his way, at that you felt a weird feeling, a territorial frown in your eyes, but you couldn't blame him. Every celebrity you have met has done this.  A simple deal, a way for celebrities to keep their affairs as private and publicly clean, both sides agreed to keep it quiet and not slip ups. When they finally look at you, turn again to him, his manager walking to him, and slipping a black plastic card. A key to the room to one of the suites. Your suite.

“I thought you could signed for me” you explained with a shy tone “I found it on the airport bookstore and since i kinda collect music album i thought it was a nice addition” 

He grabbed it “can i open it?”  he said with the cute accent, you nod excited and he carefully start to unwrap you sit by his side to get a better look, when he finished it, he looks at you

 “it has a photocard” he explains and you giggle again at the way he pronounce the last word, feeling the warm feeling in your stomach and he send your favorite smile at you.He opens the book and stop at the page with the card stuck to it “It's random so is a surprise, go, turn it around” he gesture to the book, you grab it and turn it around,

 “Oww” you let out a disappointed sound when you look at the man that clearly wasn't your Min Yoongi, he laughs and you pout “what can i do if i want one of you?” you ask with a distressed look. He dares to look flustered and he reach to his neck and the his hair, you wanted yours in its place, you licked your lips and look at lis face, “You could buy lots of album until mine come out” hmmm

“That's a good idea” his stare became intense and his eyes darken, his tongue brushed his bottom lip and someone must move forward because your lips replaced his tongue was now kissing his lips. 

Your fingers grab his shirt while his palms was cupping your cheeks, thumb brushing against it, the darkest desires in your mind, the need to be touch to be taken care of,taking his hand in yours you put it on your thigh, where your dress had lift and he complied to your silent request, pushing the fabric up and caressing your skin, but not where you need it him.

 You lean in the couch bringing him with you, but he pull from the kiss, leaving you gasping, “are you sure?” he ask, with his soft, dark eyes, lips swollen and flushed cheeks, you nod, but he shakes his head “are you sure?” he repeats, you think for a second looking at your giddy, boozy brain, “yes, i'm sure” you said with the most confident voice you could muster, he kiss you again and then its your turn to pull away from the kiss ”wait, wait, i,  i haven't, i never have i ever before, i mean, i never had done this before” you confess and he looks at you still panting, he nods, and ask again “are you sure?” and you are.

He didn't let you lay in the couch.

He let you run your fingers through his torso and take his shirt off.

You let him pull down the strips of your dress.

He let you know how much he desires you.

You let him touch for the first time against the wall, making you see stars and blow away in a climax.

He takes to the bed, carrying like you were a leaf.

You let him stole sweet moans out of your mouth

He takes it slowly, touching skin like you were fine china.

You feel like a confident woman when you whisper “you are so gorgeous, I can say anything to your face.”

He lets a deep chuckle and gives a deep thrust making you scream of pleasure.

A mix of sloppy kisses, discreet love bites, nails against skin and pasional hip thrust between the sheets you let yourself think for a second that is not a one time thing, that euphoric feeling you were experimenting and that it was the most happy you had been in years was going to finish the moment he finish panting against your neck.

You tried to not look disappointed when he stood up and walked to the bathroom, closing your eyes, letting yourself feel the remnants of your climax.

He came back a few minutes later, cleaning between your legs and leaving a soft kiss in your thigh before slipping your underwear in its place, holding you in his arms.

You cried for the first time in front of a person. 

He tells you that he knew you were hungry, he had felt it before. Not by his own choice.

You tell him about the empty feeling in your stage while on stage.

He kisses your face while rubbing circles in your back.

  When the morning sun came up you watched his sleeping figure, his back up and belly down, face facing you and his arm around you.

You mindlessly start writing invisible letters, your name. Wishing he could be more than a stranger.

He lets you a note. His number. Breakfast. And a single pink flower and a book from the souvenir store “ The meaning of flowers”

Azalea

 The azalea is the flower that ushers in springtime in the southern United States. That’s one reason it’s so closely associated with beauty and rebirth. 

These blooms are often given as a symbolic message to, “Take care of yourself,” which is an important sentiment to extend to the bereaved.

Little-Known fact:

 Azaleas are celebrated in festivals throughout the world, especially the U.S. and Asia. In Chinese culture, the azalea is known as the “thinking of home bush” and was immortalized in the poetry of a famous poet during the Tang dynasty.

HIIIIIIIIII

SO 

I FINISH THIS CHAPTER

It took years, but my mental health has been bad lately and also was hard to write the first meeting, if it look to rushed, dont worry its kinda the point, they are not in love but definetly know that they felt something. But they dont know each other,  i like to think of them as soulmates. 

We see how she was physically and mentaly hitting rock bottom and her team is not as innocent as it look.

If i was vague about everything, when the managers were talking, they were basically negociating the one night stand, that way the public wouldnt found out. A normal ocurrence in this AU.

Everything you feel courius about, please let me know.

Thank you so much for reading, i love you

[lovecolibri]

SaL anon here and we're one week away from having these two idiots on our screens again! Current mood is melancholy hope, so let's talk about Emphasis. This song is one of my favorites, the soft sad music is perfect with the pure poetry that is the lyrics ("life is a branch and it is a dove, handcrafted by confusing love" ??!! So many feels). The lyrics are great for Malex, both searched for answers (Michael his roots, Alex how to get ahead of his dad) but really only found light with each other

ONE WEEK?! It doesn't seem real! It's been 84 years....lol

Well, you picked another good one, Nonnie! I love this song, it's so soft a pretty and it grapples with all these big questions and tries to remind you to be comfortable not having all the answers. And "melancholy hope" is such a perfect descriptor for this song! I'm going to keep this in pretty much two blocks because I think they lyrics are better absorbed together.

death is promised to the bee who’s sting protects the colony. was its life worth nothing more than honey for the queen?

life is a branch and it is a dove, handcrafted by confusing love. sign language is our reply, when church bells make no sound.

in hollow towers and empty hives, we craved sweetness with a fear of heights. was it all just a grain of sand in an hourglass?

the smartest thing i’ve ever learned is that i don’t have all the answers, just a little light to call my own.

though it pales in comparison to the overarching shadows, a speck of light can reignite the sun and swallow darkness whole.

Just some thinky thoughts about that first verse and Michael sacrificing his life and future to protect Isobel and her mind from what happened. Just some thinky thoughts about Michael panicking when Alex first leaned it, but he was craving something he didn't even know he wanted and was worried it was too late. Just some thinky thoughts about Alex and Michael being just a tiny light in each other's darkness and while they couldn't abolish the darkness FOR each other, that speck of light may be enough now to help them find and reignite their OWN inner light to banish their individual demons. (if we don't get a Malex handprint I might riot)

death is a cold, blindfolded kiss. it is the finger pressed upon our lips. it puts an unwanted emphasis on how we should have lived.

life is a gorgeous, broken gift. six billion+ pieces waiting to be fixed. love letters that were never signed, sent to where we live.

but the sweetest thing i’ve ever heard is that i don’t have to have the answers, just a little light to call my own.

though it pales in comparison to the overarching shadows, a speck of light can reignite the sun and swallow darkness whole.

I love this verse with the comparison imagery of death being cold and dark and quiet, and life being beautiful and maybe broken, but with that hopeful lilt of just waiting to be fixed. But man, the focus (as it's the title of the song which makes it the most memorable) being that death "puts an unwanted emphasis on how we should have lived" and it looks like we're going to see that with Max some this season but I would also LOVE to have an Alex flashback to him losing his leg and thinking he was going to die and missing Michael and thinking about wasted time. If we get him telling Michael about it (maybe as he's injured again and before we get a handprint healing?!?!) and how almost dying made him reevaluate how he wanted to live and when he saw Michael again he knew. And speaking of that handprint that I am manifesting for season 3, could that be the speck of light that swallows darkness whole? I guess we are going to find out in LESS THAN ONE WEEK!!

[pastelrose-vivi]

Queendom 2 Round 1:Signature Song Ranking

6. Viviz

The thing about this is that there truly were no bad performances this round, everyone did so well! However, in my opinion, Viviz did the least. It didn’t feel new, it felt like they were performing the two songs as they had before, which also felt lacking because they were performing with half the members that they usually are. I don’t remember who said it, but I agree that, in this case, performing two songs meant neither stood out. This was a beautiful goodbye to Gfriend that the members never got, and I could feel the nostalgia from the performance but I just don’t think it was enough.

5. Kep1er

I was going back and forth on whether this was 5th or 4th but the comment from one of the contestants that it just felt like a music show performance really put into words how I felt about the performance and why I put them lower. I think the remix was solid and their dancing was spectacular but it really didn’t feel all that different. I think they needed to utilize the stage better. They barely used the LED screens. Also, despite ostensibly changing the concept to a racer theme, with the outfits and flags, it didn’t feel like a concept and vibe change. I think this performance would have been elevated so much more by better integrating the concept change.

4. Brave Girls

This is the first performance I’ve seen by Brave Girls and they killed it! A super fun performance and creative as well. I think the nanta section and the dance break were my favorite parts. I don’t think they fell into the same trap as Viviz, where performing two songs means not giving either a chance to stand out, which I think they accomplished by having it be Chi Mat Baram for most of the performance and only adding in the chorus of Rollin’ at the end. My only complaint is I don’t feel the new concept was properly integrated. The intro and the dance break has great, bad ass energy, but the parts from the actual songs were still very peppy and there was a disconnect between sections that felt a little odd

3. WJSN

I’m so happy they performed As You Wish, it’s the song that I was guessing they’d perform, although after seeing them float Save Me Save You as an option for this round I’m a bit sad it wasn’t that because that’s my favorite WJSN single. This was such a good performance though! I know they weren’t satisfied with it but the only noticeable mistake was the hourglass breaking which wasn’t even their fault. I don’t entirely understand what the story was but the performance was so beautiful. It was definitely a different vibe from the original way it was performed but I do wish they went a bit more different with it.

2. Hyolyn

The queen absolutely killed it! I couldn’t even tell that her shoe was broken. She deserved to get first in every category. The concept change from pool party to tropical paradise wasn’t huge, but it was distinct which I loved and thought did a lot of heavy lifting to make this stand out. This didn’t feel like a Sistar song only being performed by one member, this felt like a Hyolyn song. She nailed this performance and if it had only been the 5 artists who were able to perform at round one, Hyolyn would have been my number 1.

1. Loona

It’s unfortunate that they couldn’t perform this at round 1 because I think they’d have been giving Hyolyn a run for her money. I’m a big fan of traditional concepts and I think they always do well on Queendom/Kingdom so it was a good idea to do it. And they executed it so well! An amazing performance, from vocals to dance to remix to concept. I can’t wait to see them actually compete.

First Thoughts on Round 2

The match up I’m most excited for Brave Girls and Kep1er. The rookies vs. the group that recently blew up is such and interesting combo and their concepts are so different. I don’t really know a whole lot about Brave Girls (the only songs I know of are Rollin, Chi Mat Baram, High Heels and Deepened) so I don’t know what I want Kep1er to do, but I am hopeful that they don’t choose Rollin. Brave Girls has a large discography and I think it would be nice to show more of what they have to offer. As for Brave Girls covering Kep1er, I’m betting on Mvsk being chosen. I think it’s doubtful that Brave Girls will choose Wa Da Da because Kep1er just did it and it would be kind of repetitive. Plus I don’t think any other songs on Kep1er’s EP would fit them. Mvsk has the most mature vibe of Kep1er’s songs and I think Brave Girls could really do something with that.

The matchup I’m most worried about is WJSN and Viviz. Their concepts are already so similar that I think it’ll be hard to do a distinct cover, but I hope they prove me wrong. I hope that WJSN choose Bop Bop for their cover. They’ve done upbeat before with Boogie Up and I’d like to see them do Viviz’s new song instead of just doing their Gfriend stuff. I know that Viviz has been saying that Viviz=Gfriend and that they are fundamentally the same but still. I’d like to see them do Bop Bop, I just don’t know what concept I’d like to see. If they do a Gfriend song, I think Fingertip would be a fun and interesting choice that works well with WJSN’s concept. As for Viviz’s cover, I’m always hoping for Save Me Save You to be on the table. But I also don’t know the vibe that Viviz is going for as Viviz. Bop Bop doesn’t sound like a Gfriend song. So if they’re wanting to follow the sound they have as Viviz, Boogie Up might be a good choice for them. But if they want to go Gfriend vibes, I think Secret would be a good choice

I think the Hyolyn and Loona swap is going to be the most interesting. They both are so good at making concepts, as seen by round 1. I don’t think any groups are going to dip into b sides other than Brave Girl, who would be doing it only because Kep1er only has one single, and I don’t think Hyolyn would dip into Loona’s predebut solos, so that leaves only 4 songs since Paint the Town is also off the table. I would be interested in seeing what Hyolyn would do with Butterfly because that’s my least favorite Loona single but I’m also interested in her take on So What. I just don’t think Hi High and Why Not would be Hyolyn’s pick but who knows? I think this is the least predictable match up. As for Loona we have a bit of a spoiler to help a prediction, because in the teaser for next episode it shows that they have a bright 50’s diner concept. I was really hoping that they would perform one of Hyolyn’s solo songs here and I think that’s still possible. I think bright and happy summer songs like See Sea and Bae would lend themselves to this concept. As for possible Sistar songs, I think Loving U or I Swear would be interesting to see but that’s also because they’re my favorite Sistar songs. Maybe So Cool, but I think a really interesting concept switch for this would be I Like That. I think it’s unlikely because that would be a difficult concept change to pull of but I’d love to see it.

[silverglass83]

OC Association for Yurielle

I was tagged by @mogwaei​ and though I know you are not very far with Part 1, I hope this isn't too spoilery for both you and new readers of my Dragonlance fic series: Time of the Hourglass. Thank you for tagging me!

This also kind of turned into a list of things, not only associated with Yurielle, but her favorites too. The portrait above is by me. I also did a companion piece of Raistlin Majere to match.

Animal: Fistandantilus frequently calls her 'little bird' and though I have yet to reveal what this means, there is a reason behind the symbolism!

Color: Indigo and silver but if I were to pick her favorite it'd probably be gold and black for her Hourglass Mage

Month: I don't think there is a particular month that would be associated her and since she was orphaned at a young age, Yurielle doesn't know her exact birthday. (but since Raistlin is technically a Gemini, I head canon that Yurielle is a Libra because I'm weird like that xD)

Song: This one is hard because most songs I have in mind are ones that represent both her and Raistlin and their relationship together. However, I did post a song in chapter 23 of Part 1 – 'The Humming' by Enya - that I still think represents Yurielle's mystery, magic, and purpose. And because I'm a huge Final Fantasy fan, the 'Prelude' song could be associated with Yurielle because of its pure, yet haunting melody - especially FFXIV's Prelude, because I created my character in that game to be her lol.

Day or Night: Nighttime because as Raistlin has said that she is the star that no darkness can cover

Plant: Dandelion, nettle, thistles, ivy – the sort of plants that most find to be weeds (at least in our world) Yurielle finds value and beauty in and will probably sit for hours doodling in her sketchbook while studying them.

Scent: Books and incense such as patchouli. But she is known to smell like peppermint, roses, orange blossoms and other various scents depending on her current favorite soap at the time.

Gemstone: Rainbow obsidian, labradorite -any dark stone that reveals an array of color and beauty upon closer inspection and light (because that is what she does for others)

Season: Autumn? While not particularly associated with her, I'd say that she probably enjoys fall the most. The chilled hush before winter and the way leaves crunch in her hands is probably some of Yurielle's favorite things! Plus, Raistlin often thinks of the Vallenwoods in Solace when looking at her hair, especially when sunlight highlights the red in it.

Place(s): Again, I can't think of any particular place associated with her but Yurielle loves the Shoikan Grove and the Tower of High Sorcery in Palanthas! She embraces the Grove's sadness and sings to soothe its ache while she can spend hours getting lost in and uncovering all the secrets within the tower itself. However, it's not the typical secrets one would expect a wizard would search for inside, but rather the forgotten, ordinary items – be it a button rolled under a dresser, a hairpin forgotten under a rug – she likes to find them and discover their secrets.

Element: Light. For reasons.

Food & drink: Dandelion tea and ginger snap cookies. She also has a sweet tooth and enjoys a good sticky bun or sweet roll! ~~~ I think that about covers her for now. I don’t really know anyone else on tumblr who has an OC to talk about... so I sadly can’t really tag anyone further. But check out @mogwaei​‘s original post here! Thank you for reading!

[milkybonya]

Soulmate!Wooseok

This is part of a Soulmate!Pentagon series that was requested by an anon: Soulmate!Hongseok / Soulmate!Kino / Soulmate!Shinwon / Soulmate!Yeo One / Soulmate!Jinho / Soulmate!Hui /Soulmate!Yanan / Soulmate!Yuto

Warnings: this is more dark/angsty ! 

Pairing: Wooseok x reader

Summary: Everyone has an hourglass necklace that looks the same as the one their soulmate has. The sand does not stop falling until the moment your soulmate is standing before you. 

Song (rec) to listen to while reading: The Black Hall by Pentagon

[a/n]: im thinking about my anon who requested Wooseok scenarios before hehe,, i hope they’re doing okay, i hope all of you who read this are doing well !! take care of yourselves, or else i’ll be sad :(

You’ve worn the necklace ever since you can remember, the cool, silver chain against your skin becoming a natural feeling. The necklace has been like an anchor when you’re in deep thought, anxious or nervous, keeping you down to earth and bringing you back to reality. It’s always satisfying to watch the tiny grains of sand trickle through the glass.

The hourglass itself is small, barely the size of your pinkie finger, so it’s not too heavy or bulky when it hangs around your neck. You’ve always adored it and considered yourself lucky for having such a pretty necklace. Since everyone’s necklace is unique and the only person with a necklace like theirs is their soulmate, some people end up with some crazy looking hourglasses around their necks.

Yours is very simple: just the glass and a deep maroon-coloured sand that falls. Nothing extra or fancy, and you love it that way.

Sometimes you scramble for the necklace when you see an attractive person in your vicinity, hoping that the sand has stopped falling, and that you’ve met your soulmate. It has never happened though.

Some people date around even though they haven’t met their soulmate yet, but you tell yourself you want to be loyal. Your friend is a bad influence, though.

“Come on, there’s nothing wrong with going to the club! Please, just come once and have a good time. I promise I won’t make you talk with anyone!” your friend begs as she pulls your sleeve. 

With a sigh, you give in, and she starts to head for the closet of your room to find things for you to wear.

“I’ll come as long as you let me choose my own outfit,” you say. Your friend agrees with a quick nod before you can say no, and walks out so you can quickly choose something to wear.

All dressed up, you and your friend leave and head to a nearby club, one that is apparently good, according to your friend. Her hourglass is still full of trickling sand too, but she’s always in the club looking for a lover. 

“I don’t really believe in soulmates or destiny,” she always says. “I’ll find my own lover!” but sadly, her relationships never last.

There is a long lineup outside of the club already when you approach it, the black doors shut with two ushers on either side. The building is only two floors high, with all of the bricks painted black. 

Your friend has her arm looped in yours tightly, and is walking for the doors. You wonder why she’s not going to back of the line and get worried when people glare at you. But the ushers seem to recognize her and open the door for her immediately.

“How did we get in that fast?” you whisper in her ear as the two of you enter.

“I come here way too often,” she responds. “Everyone here knows me!”

The music gets louder and louder as the darkness of the hallway leading to the main area swallows you. Then, it’s all bright lights and people moving their bodies: dancing, laughing, flirting, singing along.

Your friend walks to the dance floor immediately, and you notice a lot of people eyeing her and her moves up. You don’t want to leave her side but you’re hesitant to be the centre of attention, so you just hang around the lounging area, becoming a wallflower.

While still dancing, your friend gestures for you to join her, but you shake your head and she gives you a pout. She ends up dancing over to you and dragging you to dance with her. I’ll never forgive you for this, you think.

You try your best to loosen up and enjoy the moment, imagining that no one is watching you, even though you have become the centre of attention as you dance around your friend who is popular here. She doesn’t care though; all her attention is on you and helping you have a good time. 

Looking around, your eyes fall on the DJ who is on a platform near the back of the club, clearly enjoying himself as he belts out tunes. You admire the way he’s vibing with the music and having a good time. 

The black hair that keeps prickling his eyes bounce around as he moves his head to the beat. His large eyes move away from his hands that are entangled with the buttons and keys in front of him to look at the people on the dance floor. When his eyes meet yours, he gives you a small smile, nodding at you. You can’t help but wonder if that smile was a greeting or if he was laughing at your embarrassing moves.

“Stop staring at the DJ!” your friend shouts in your ear, trying to break through the loud music.

You stick your tongue out at her and continue to dance.

After some time, you’re worn out and resting in the lounging area, drinking something cold to help you cool off and catch your breath. You can’t help but look in the direction of the DJ again. Yes, he’s cute. Maybe you’re already crushing on him. You can’t help it! This is your friend’s fault >:(

You notice that he has removed his headset and someone else is taking his place as he leaves the platform while running his long fingers through his hair. Even the way he walks is so cool and effortless. You feel a hand wipe across your chin and you turn to your friend.

“Stop drooling over him! Just go talk to him already,” she says, sipping her drink.

“I can’t just do that..” you say.

“Oh come on! What, do you want me to do it for you?” she asks, already standing up. Even pulling her arm down is not enough to stop her, and you put your head down on the table as she approaches him. Curious, you move your head a little to the left to peek at the tall figure of the DJ who is listening to your friend’s words with a small smile.

As soon as your friend points in your direction, you hide your face again. The DJ laughs from his spot next to your friend. He places his hands in his pockets as he walks over to you, his necklace swinging against his chest.

“[y/n], you can’t hide forever, you know. He’s here now.” your friend says, tapping your arm that you’ve laid across the table. You slowly look up to see the beautiful face of the DJ grinning down at you. He scratches the back of his head before he sits down across from you. Your friend does nothing but give you a wink before walking off.

“I’m Wooseok,” he says, in a deep voice. “You’re [y/n]?” you nod silently in return, still slouched over the table and looking down in embarrassment.

“Nice necklace,” he says, making you realize that you’re pulling on it - your nervous habit.

“Thanks,” you say, looking down at it.

“Doesn’t it kind of look like mine though?” Wooseok asks, holding his up so you can see. 

“Yeah, but why are you still wearing it if the sand has stopped falling?” you ask.

He gives you a shocked look, his eyes falling onto his hourglass.

“It has... stopped falling?” he asks. He looks around before his eyes return to you.

“Wait, what about yours?” he asks.

“What about mine?” you ask, looking at your necklace again... only to notice that the sand in yours has also stopped falling. When he notices your wide eyes, Wooseok laughs.

“Our necklaces look the same and the sand stopped falling at the same time. I wonder what this means?” he teases.

“You’re my soulmate,” you gasp.

[nad-zeta]

Match up ｡◕‿◕｡

Hello, may I get a ikemen vampire match please! :D PHYSICAL FEATURES: 5'5", long straight black hair (past the shoulders, but not past the chest), light brown skin, beauty mark on my left cheek almost adjacent to nostril, "fiery" brown almond shaped eyes and a little bit of a thicker eyebrows, body figure: close to a pear shape or an hourglass (I really can't distinguish the difference between the two when it comes to my body).

PERSONALITY: I tend to be down to earth when I need to be, but to be honest my head is always in the clouds and I have a habit to look forward to the future rather than to focus on the present. People would tend to think I am strong and could be a good leader, but I think they hold this perception because I am confident in myself and strong willed. In actuality I hate to lead others, rather I like to help everyone else with their vision or goals. I am also someone who finds positivity in many situations, but sometimes pessimistic (or just pure procrastination) gets the better of me, but I have no worries when this happens because I becone my own motivator. Big dreamer and occasionally a romantic (when the mood is right). Also, I have had my shares of being shut out during conversationsor have noticed people wanting to be a part of a group or to be inclusive in some manner, due to these experiencesand observations I found myselfalways wanting to make sure everyonehas had their voice spoken and listened to. As a direct influence to my personality on how I want everyone to have a voice and to be listened to I became someonewho enjoyed being the listener and the observer in the group. I have recently taken the Bridge Myer Test and it said I am and INFP (which I believe describes me fairly well).

HOW WOULD I ACT IN A RELATIONSHIP: I love to listen to others and observe their reactions, understanding who they are on a deeper level, this only further my understanding of my love language: which is quality time. Just spending time with the person I love and listening to them while they interchangeably listen to me is my ultimate high. Even enjoying each others company and not saying a word sits well in my heart, as long as we are enjoying ourselves. I am not a level 10 PDA person, but to be honest I wouldn't mind having someone who is expressive in that area (as long as I am given space afterwards), to be honset I may even enjoy it. At the start of a relationship I tend to have rose colored glasses on max as I pursue someone I like, but as they admit their emotions they hold for me and the lovely valentine styled scene shatters and I begin to see everything more clearly. Instantly I tend to only want a relationship of friendship to grow between us, which becomes a better outcome as I can grow to love the confesser as the person they really are and actually develop genuine love and not just a crush or lust.

MORE INFO ABOUT ME: I am currently studying architecture and I love the arts. Hobbies of mine is to expand my herb garden, go jogging, go white water rafting, learn to roller skate (still a beginner), learn to paddle board (still a dream of mine to even start this hobbie), help my dad pick vegtables from the garden, and feed our sheep. I tend to take the beaten path when traveling, shopping, or finding a place to eat. Also for a little fun for this match-up, I'm minoring in Medevial Renaissance in hopes to use my degree to go to Europe or Japan and restore old castles or buildings. Speaking about traveling, I love areas that heavy on history, culture, and connected towards nature (some areas that come to mind is Scotland, New Orleans Louisiana, Savannah Georgia, Montana, Italy, Greece, ect.). Some of my other invests would be: enjoying horror, mystery, psychologically teasing movies and books, murder podcasts, history documentaries (especially history documentaries that involves the involvement of phantoms, occult, witchcraft, voodoo,.ect) paranormal YouTubevideos, I love to go antiquing, and enjoy exploringthe food world (while I also improvemy skill in cooking), and I enjoy indie pop music and recently found myself loving songs with a twist of blues.

Hi hi love! 🌻❤Thank you so much for the request and sorry for taking so long with it! I hope you have a super good day, sending lots of hugs! ❤☺Hope ya enjoy it! ❤☺ @100christy

 So I match you with.................. Comte

  The first time you met the legend, Saint Germain de Comte was during one of your classes minoring in the Medieval Renaissance. They had gotten in a very handsome man with gold, dusty coloured hair and timeless golden eyes, to guest speak during one of the lectures. He spoke with a sense of a knowing grace about alchemy, the traditions, cultures and history of that time. He had encaptivated all the students; all eyes were on him as everyone hung onto his every word. He elegantly walked about the lecture hall speaking as if he had, had a first account of the event being described and that is when his eyes locked with yours. His golden eyes were gleaming in the rays of the afternoon sun, piercing down into the depths of your soul, and that is when this mysterious man stole your heart. And little known to you, the second this man saw your fiery brown almond eyes, his breath caught in his throat and he found that for the first time in his immortal life, his heart had been stolen right from under his nose.

For the rest of his lecture, you were off in the clouds, far away from reality, in fact by the time you had come back down to earth the lesson was over and all the students were on their feet to leave. You caught a glance of the golden man’s coat that he had forgotten laying on the front desk. Suddenly you felt the urge to chase after him. You trailed behind the blond man, hoping to catch up to him to deliver him his coat back. You followed him all the way to some fancy museum when you lost sight of him as he disappeared through a large wooden door. There was a mystical air about the door and sounding area, and as a travel and mystery lover, you couldn’t help but follow after the man. The room around you changed from crips white museum walls, to an old victorian style room filled to the brim with the most fascinating antiques. You wished nothing more than to explore the house filled with the most curious nicknacks, but you pushed on to find the man to return him the coat.

You were suddenly startled when the very man that you were trying to track down, appeared behind you and tapped you on the shoulder, “Are you looking for me, Ma Cherie.” You got a freight but relaxed the second you caught sight of his gentle smile.

“Found you! You forgot your coat in class, so I thought I might return it to you.” He smiled down tenderly at you as he gently took the coat from your hands, “I hope you didn’t go through to much trouble to get this back to me my dear,” He then carefully took your hand and laid a chaste kiss on it, “would you like to join me in the garden from some tea, Ma Cherie. I would like to do at least something to thank you for going through all that trouble.” A sad smile crossed his face as he gently took your hand in his and led you to the garden signalling for the butler to bring the two of you some tea and snacks to the gazebo out in the lush, vibrant garden.

Comte couldn’t help but smile a fond smile down at you as you excitingly examined his herb garden. He crouched down beside you and gushed all about his little plants he had nursed from seedling, and you couldn’t help but smile up at the man. His timeless old face had tuned youthful as he raved all about the herbs and how his butler uses them in their meals. He even offered you a little patch to start your own, and before you could decline, he dropped the “you will be here for one-month” bomb. And that is how your relationship with the pureblood started.

In the weeks to follow you and Comte spent a significant amount of time together from travelling around the province to visit every antique shop insight to doing a bit of gardening together.

As it was, the two of you shared a common love language, and that would be quality time, and as such, every free moment the two of you got, was spent together. Comte is very much a busybody and has many different friends in different places, so its no surprise when he invites you along to travel with him. Once he is done with his business the two of your travel around the area going sightseeing, from looking at different castles to discovering all that is to be known about French architecture of the late 19th century. In fact, sometimes your travels expand even out of Paris to neighbouring provinces and areas.

When the two of you aren’t off travelling the world together, you are back at the mansion just enjoying each others company. Sometimes the two of you would simply be in the same room together each busy with their own task while enjoying the company of the other presence.

As time passes the two of you become relatively close friends, Comte knows you have to go back in a month, and he wouldn’t dare ask you to give up your life in the future for him. So he cherishes every moment spent in the past with you. He knows his heart will be broken in two when the day comes, but he is determined to do what it takes to make you happy. After all, you are the love of his life, whether you know it or not. This man fell in love with you the moment he first met you, and after spending countless days with you, that love has only grown.

He loves how strong-willed and confident you are, giving all the men and woman at the fancy banquets a run for their money. He loves how much you have helped the fellow residents subtly realize their visions and goals and have helped them to grow. He especially loves the way you include everyone in your conversations. You're a truly kind and caring soul, and he can't help but deeply cherish you. So he does the only thing he can do while you are still with him….. he spoils you. This man loves to buy gifts for you, and he WILL buy you anything and everything your heart desires.

And through your time spent the golden pureblood, you have come to realize that somewhere along the line you stopped seeing him as a friend and instead saw him as a potential partner. Your rose coloured glasses were shattered, as you had come upon that realization one night during one of the balls. You were dancing with Comte and couldn’t help but beam at the carefree smile he wore, and at that moment you realized you wanted to spend the rest of your life seeing that carefree smile. You realized that your feeling had gone beyond some measly crush or just lust, but that you truly loved him as a best friend, dare I say, soul mate. You were now determined to make your feelings know.

You confessed your feeling to Comte one sunny afternoon while the two of you went white water rafting. After making your way down the river, the two of you landed up in a still lake in the middle of the forest. The two of you had found this river a while back while you were hiking after you had insisted on taking the beaten path. On the waters of the crystal clear still water you looked up into Comte's golden eyes and confessed your love. To say this man was delighted would be an understatement. Gentlemanly as always he gently took hold of your hand and kissed it, while stating that he felt the exact same way.

The two fo you cuties were inseparable, always off together doing some or other fun activity. Comte loved that you had so many varies hobbies, and he truly enjoyed participating in each and every one of these hobbies. Be it jogging, or rollerskating he was always keen to try new things.

His favourite of your hobbies would have to be shopping and discovering new places to eat. If the two of you aren’t doing something active, you are out in the town buying everything in sight and trying variouse new restaurants. It has actually become a lunchtime tradition for Comte to seek you out and escort you into town where the two of you would have lunch together at a new café.

The two of you have a very open and honest relationship that has been built on the best foundation….. Friendship. Comte absolutely loves those quieter moments with you nestled against his chest as the two of you talk about anything and everything. He loves that you actually listen to and try and, understand who he is on a deeper level.

He is at his happiest when he is just spending time with you and listening to you as you interchangeably listen to him as well. Speaking of, you absolutely love picking this man’s brain about cultures and history, and he loves nothing more than to tell you story upon story of historical events that he has lived through and witnessed first hand. This man lives for that excited expression on your face whenever the two of you talk history, culture and how it is connected to nature. And oooh when comte found out you liked mysteries and stories about the paranormal (phantoms, occult, witchcraft, voodoo,etc), he was all too pleased to spill the tea and even do some research on the topics together with you.

All and all the two of you have a lot of fun together, whether its out exploring the world or spending a quiet night in simply nestled in each other's arms exchanging words of love. Comte will spend every day of your mortal life cherishing you. And every day of your immortal life together showering you with an endless amount of love and affection. After all, he is at his happiest when you are happy, his dearest soul mate

Other Potential matches………………… Dazai 

I hope you enjoyed this love and have the best day!❤☺🥰

[smolbeandrabbles]

Beat This Summer - Nolan Sorrento x Reader (Ready Player One)

GIF CREDIT: X

@mandy23b​ @wltz-bby​ @happyskywhale​ #mendotagsquad

Nolan Sorrento + 47: “Dogs don’t wear clothes!” Requested by @mysticaltimemachinewench

Author’s Note: Okay, this one took a little time. And I was already thinking of a vacation premise with Nolan, then kinda worked the dogs into it - and then *bam* this one hit me-! Also while doing all my research it all kinda just fell into place and I couldn’t believe how perfectly. Please enjoy! 😁 @mendelskrull​ - Shoutout for your help around vacationing in Sorrento, I hope I did it justice! 

Beat This Summer - Brad Paisley

Disclaimer: RPO characters not mine / gif not mine / lyrics not mine / a teeny-tiny reference to Tron Legacy for those that haven’t seen it

Premise: While on a much needed vacation in Italy, Nolan Sorrento decides he’s the dog fashion police.

Words: 2746

Warnings: N/A - a slight sexual reference and he’s drinking.

_____ Like the Ferris wheel goes around and around Well the trouble with up is there's always a down First I'm holding your hand and we're on the boardwalk There's heaven right here on these streets and these docks But the sun keeps setting and the days go fast And the sand on the beach is like an hourglass And I can just feel it, I'm slipping away And babe, I can already say As long as I live, whatever I do As great as it is you know what's a bummer I ain't never gonna beat this summer with you Baby, it's true The taste in your kiss is so bittersweet I ain't gonna beat, no way I'm gonna beat this summer with you Maybe I know that it ain't over yet So let's make the most of what we have left But it's hard living for this moment we're in Knowing it's all gonna end Looking at you, girl, standing there, Got your wayfarer's on and the sun in your hair And just like the song in a seashell, you'll be stuck in mind Bouncing around in my head And baby, I can tell As long as I live, whatever I do Baby, it's true I ain't gonna beat, no way I'm gonna beat this summer with you

---

It won’t always be like this... you found yourself thinking as you sat there outside that little cafe. Even if you wished it could be. Even if part of you felt like you never wanted to leave. He would have to - you didn’t see them letting him run the company from here... and Nolan didn’t have anything with him to help him run the company. Besides a tablet - which he was allowed to check once a day for anything urgent and then you hid it away again.

 The holiday had been your suggestion. Nolan looked like he needed a break, in your opinion he also more than deserved it. He’d worked so hard for so long and neither of you had had a proper holiday for at least a year. In fact, a rather lasting memory for you was that he blew off the last vacation for something that IOI “urgently” needed him for and you had to go alone. Even though you were away and relaxing, it was one of your worst weeks. This time, no wasn’t an option. Nolan Sorrento was coming on holiday with you and unwinding, even if he complained the whole time; and what better place to go than Italy. Sorrento, Italy, of course! You could only assume that given the namesake his ancestral lineage would trace back here. Nolan didn’t complain even once - he didn’t even roll his eyes when you suggested it as a place to go. He’d been once before, but not with you, and he’d been younger then. Before everything in the world had turned fairly dystopian. Sorrento was still fairly untouched by that though; still a popular tourist destination (for those that could afford such things). There were the occasional VR headsets, but you hadn’t seen one IOI advert. Life was better here - another reason why you thought Nolan might be acting more settled. You made the note in the back of your head that maybe moving to Europe would be a good plan, in future, even if you had to wait until he retired and IOI were using him as a chairman (bonus if he looked a little like Alan in Tron Legacy. You could visualise that; wondering for a second what Nolan would look like with glasses).

 You’d had a really fantastic holiday so far, and you still had a few days left... but you were already worried about it ending. Sad that he’d soon enough be slipping back into a suit at some ungodly hour in the morning and kissing you goodbye until just as ridiculously late in the evening. That made you more determined to sit and enjoy it while you could. And whilst you sat here staring at him this morning sipping coffee and red wine (Yes. Really. - but of course your wine connoisseur was going to do such a thing ‘My dear! This is Italy!’ and you teasing back, with what you had learned about the city you were visiting ‘But then surely you should be sipping limoncello?!’, ending with Nolan giving you a sharp look), you couldn’t help but reminisce your holiday.

It hadn’t all been picturesque squares and coastline – although the Amalfi coast was known for that – in Sorrento itself you’d had the opportunity to visit small museums (art and archaeological), pretty churches and colonnades, go down to the bay and marina to sit and watch the boats sail in and out across the sea, probably about every ice cream parlour that Nolan would allow you to drag him into, and quaint shopping streets, including market day – a tradition not broken by the state of the world and maybe one of your favourite days so far. Of course you hadn’t missed the opportunity to watch Limoncello being produced and the reason Nolan had probably given you such a look was because you continued to make the same joke every time he ordered wine instead – despite his insistence that wine from Campania was still fantastic. Outside of the city you’d been able to get a little more cultural; Naples, Pompeii, Vesuvius where you could both wax lyrical about ancient history together – a mutual interest - and Sorrento was also near a quiet marine reserve with stunning views of its own. And as if all that wasn’t enough on its own, he’d also whisked you across the water to the ever popular island of Capri. You felt a million miles from what you were used to in Columbus; it couldn’t have been any wonder why you wanted to stay here.

 You were only slightly snapped back to reality by the waiter coming to check on things; you use the word slightly because, although it had taken you out of your daydreams, Nolan was now speaking Italian. And you were fast discovering there was no better sound in the universe - you didn’t think you’d ever been so besotted with something so completely in your life. You were talking full on heart eyes. You didn’t understand much of it, but it just sounded so good with that voice of his. You shuddered slightly in delight and you could tell he’d caught it from the corner of his eye because Nolan smirked - even if his full attention was on the back and forth banter. More than once you’d thought about being brave enough to ask him to use it in far more intimate situations. Maybe tonight. Tonight you were going to the best drinks terrace in the city to watch the sunset - Nolan’s words, still after everywhere he’d taken you so far, you’d believe him - yet you’re craving of it would have to wait, even though he’d would continue using Italian all day. The café you were sitting in was on Plaza Tasso, lined with little places like this you weren’t sure how Nolan managed to determine that this was also the best one. Perhaps because he’d been before; but he probably wasn’t far wrong. In the late morning sun, you were sure that this was about to drift its way into early lunch as Nolan hadn’t had an inkling of giving you a rundown of his planned day. He had no inclination to move right now either and leant back in his chair for a minute with a smile. He'd looked good all holiday, but there was something about him in the sun right now; in a nice button up shirt, sleeves rolled to his elbows, and shorts – Nolan’s shades were back in his hair and the constant bright weather has turned it a beautiful silver grey. You would also attribute the sun today to how dazzling the blue in his eyes looked and, as a further blessing that was only making you sit and swoon harder, his freckles were out… ‘Oh god… oh my god… he’s so beautiful!’ You were sitting to the table leaning on your hands and hanging onto every word he said, even when you didn’t understand the language. Until Nolan turned those eyes on you, biting his lip as he smiled and traced his gaze over you – telling you how great you looked today. Your face was heating up and that, in particular, had nothing to do with the hot sunshine, you were beaming so much your face was aching, and he knew it. So Nolan spent his time trying to make you smile more, and laugh more, to the point where you were forced to cover your face and yet that only made him turn up the sweet talk. “Please… Nolan! A girl can only take so much.” “Uh huh…” He grinned with a little wink, “And yet,” Nolan indicated around him, “In a city as beautiful as this, it’s clear to me that the most stunning sight is right in front of me.” “NOLAN!!” You could only imagine the shade of red you were turning. “Aw, come now, Y/N, don’t deny it.” You would; you were never one for taking compliments without hiding behind your hands. Nolan at best would deflect them with a bashful smile, but usually gave you a look that told you to please carry on. Today Nolan was content on giving them, he was receiving enough just from the looks you were giving him. He would revel in that attention; and couldn’t help but be a little smug about it. You were content to sit in silence and stare at him; but Nolan did eventually get to telling you about what he was thinking your day would entail – with the promise of that terrace this evening though, it was certainly going to be a more relaxing day. You were ready for that and would have been content to stay with him in bed all day – you weren’t going to complain though when he was a vision in sunlight. Sweet talk and small talk persisted as you continued to sip your drinks, and soon enough the table was filled with empty glasses and cups, and Nolan was asking for the lunch menu. No, moving on was happening no time soon – and you were still enamoured with each other. Just about the time you started thinking that though, Nolan’s eyeline moved from you to just behind, and he raised an eyebrow. You probably wouldn’t have noticed, if his coffee cup hadn’t been half way to his lips – now frozen. “What?” You looked in the direction he was staring but saw nothing out of the ordinary. Nolan had other ideas. “Hold on. What!?” You watched his eyes follow a woman and a dog and wondered why he looked so incensed. To you she looked like a typical Italian woman, dressed well – maybe a little too well to be walking through town with a dog, but each to their own – with a dog walking obediently on a lead. Nolan’s voice very nearly pitched; "No! That’s not right-! What is going on-!!?” You raised an eyebrow at him and then looked back; the dog itself was also dressed: dress shirt, waistcoat, bow tie. And you leant on your hand again with a smile; “Aww!! It’s so cute!” Nolan immediately snorted, “NO it’s not-! Dogs don’t wear clothes-!” Oh, that was his problem-!? It was making you think back to when you were younger and the dog you used to have, he had many outfits that you loved to dress him up in: from the cute, to sophisticated, to absolutely hysterical. They were fond memories, and you found yourself smiling as you reminisced; “When I was growing up I had a dog: we used to dress him up and it was so sweet!” You saw Nolan cringe out of the corner of your eye and you wondered if he was cringing at the scenario in front of him, or the fact that he’d said such a thing and with your anecdote he’d probably felt as if he’d screwed up big time. You wouldn’t hold it against him, but maybe you wouldn’t tell him that for a while – and you’d let him stew with the embarrassment. He cleared his throat, sliding his shades down over his eyes so you didn’t catch them emoting; “If you say so…” “I do-! It’s just a fine-looking lady with a handsome dog-! What’s wrong with that-!? Who made you the killjoy police?! Or are you the fashion police?” “I think I lost fashion police status a little while ago.” “Or you’re a rookie.” You thought on it, “The suits are sharp. Your intern days… ehhhhh… But I’ll forgive you, everyone has a glow up no matter how late.” He tried to keep a straight face but gave in and chuckled, “Thanks-!” Your eyes were drawn to the sound of barking from the other side of the plaza, and you realised that this dressed dog was not alone. In fact there were many well-dressed Italians walking well-dressed dogs; in suits and pretty dresses – a fashion show? For dogs? Surely not! Suddenly you gasped, realising that they were all heading out of the church. A wedding procession! Your hand went to your mouth, because there was no way you were letting Nolan realise how much you were smiling at that. “Oh my god…” He murmured, realising. All the guests and their dogs were dressed beautifully that much was true, but the bride and groom looked flawless. And, as you might expect, their dogs were in a matching dress and suit. You wouldn’t be surprised if they were essentially the best man and flower girl. But the matching really got you – and the whole idea was wonderful. The guests had been allowed to bring their dogs; and had dressed them appropriately. And with the sun shining down on them today, the wedding party looked glorious – they were all so happy and smiling. And the bride and groom looked so in love. You immediately looked over to your partner, pleased to see this hadn’t gone unnoticed, and despite his protest to the dressed dogs, there was a little smile on his face. Small it might have been, but significant. Nolan recognised the way they were looking at each other to be similar to the way you had both been flirting over these drinks. You wondered if he thought about the possibility of marriage as often as you did. If Nolan was even that traditional… and his smile only broadened as you continued to stare across at him. “You’re missing the pictures you know!” He grinned, still watching the square. “Yes…” You mused, “But, part of me wishes I could take pictures of this.” He laughed, shaking his head, and you saw that small bashful smile he tried to hide;  “Uh huh…” You looked back to the dogs again, how cute and happy they looked, feeding off every owners energy – as if they also knew the significance of the day. “But Nolan don’t they look so CUTE!! They’re all dressed so well-!” Nolan picked up his wine glass and took a sip, making you wonder if he really needed a drink for this. He didn’t agree with you, instead he looked across to you – and even behind those shades you knew exactly the look in his eyes. “Don’t get ANY ideas-!!!” You immediately straightened in your chair, attentive to his sentence and its implications; “Are you gonna propose?!” He scoffed, folding his arms to immediately shut your excitement down before it became uncontrollable; “Hell nah! If I was gonna do that I would have done it on the way to Capri!” Ah-! Yes; not only was Capri really beautiful, but Nolan insisted that instead of taking you over on a private boat (you were surprised), you had to go over on a tourist boat. As you had continued to sail towards the island however you realised why, as Nolan took your hand and you found yourselves sailing under a rock formation shaped like a heart. If you didn’t think that was pretty and romantic enough; your guide was not opposed to cranking up the love songs – and then apparently as tradition, all the couples onboard kissed. Which of course Nolan knew, so when the romantic music started and you got a little confused you only had to look to that smirk on his face to know he’d planned this one out too. For the record it was a good kiss, and he held your hand tight, unopposed to stealing more than one. Now he mentioned it, the heart grotto would have been a pretty ideal place to propose to someone. Nolan pressed his fingers to his lips; “Oh god, would that be too cliché?!” Your eyes were wide just thinking on the prospect and the way he now seemed to be in too much denial; “Boy! Say sike! You’re gonna propose!” He totally was, he had to be. Nolan pushed his shades back and turned his gorgeous blue eyes on you. This time he was firm; “No! I’m not! I’m not! Stop it! If that’s what you want, you’ll be disappointed.” You sighed gently, accepting that that wasn’t to be your fate on this holiday, but maybe soon. It was after all a not now, rather than a dead set against it. As you settled down once more to watch the dogs in the wedding party with that pretty, absentminded smile Nolan was only watching you. With a gentle smile of his own; One day I will... darling... I promise you, that will be us, one day...

---

10/16! More than half way! Home Stretch time!! Thank you for reading!!! 💜💙

[paradise-creator]

@ezmariest

hiiii!! I was wondering if I could request a haven box matchup? I’m rlly sorry about submitting it there was too much of a word limit in the ask thing :(

First I’m a bi curious female and I would love a romantic matchup with a male :)

Uh ok I’m really fun and like making weird or random jokes a lot, like a lot humor is kinda my coping mechanism haha😗✌️ I’m very respectful and understanding of other people and I’m really supportive. I’m enthusiastic and talkative with those I’m close with but with other people I’m vv quiet. Im also rlly laid back. A lot of people say I’m really kind or “too nice” and I love helping people or making them laugh. I have a bad tendency to hide my feeling and emotions and usually I block my problems with humor. Many have said I’m very ambitious and I have a lot of goals. I also am pretty insecure and I get down on myself way too much because of a lot of reasons but mostly bc of my high expectations and that I’m a perfectionist. I love sweets

I like goofy or weird people because then I can be myself and I like doing spontaneous and fun things. However I am an introvert so even though I love enthusiastic people, I get drained out when I hang out with too many people for too long. I also don’t like judgmental people, especially if they judge things that others can’t control or others dreams.

Hobbies: I really love sports and I’m pretty athletic. I play volleyball and think it’s fun but my main sport is definetly basketball. I really love drawing and I also love writing. And music is kind of the love of my life and you will always see me daydreaming with my earbuds in just listening to music.

Appearance: I have very long hair that’s really light brown, greenish gray eyes, and rounder features. I’m around 5’8 1/2 and I have an hourglass body but with MUCH more on my thighs and butt😃🤚I and athletic body type and I would say I look ✨sturdy✨and I’m pretty thin everywhere but my thighs and butt like I’ve said before. I value comfort in clothes at the moment so sweatpants and hoodies or just oversized stuff are kinda my go to. However I do want to have a better style which would kinda be a mix of “art hoe” and “alt girl” ahsjhja

Some fun facts about me:

*I love sweets, especially chocolate, and I love nighttime.

*I’m constantly daydreaming and doodling and I get called out on it by my friends.

*I want to be an animator for Disney Pixar when I’m older and My goal is to go to cal arts for college.

*A couple of my favorite songs are eight wonder (lemon demon), rue (girl in red), any mother mother song (but especially “oh Ana”) , and rhinestone eyes (gorillaz)

Ahh sorry I didn’t realize how long this was, thank you so much!! <33

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Hello and Welcome my Starlight!

The Haven box includes:

- Match up

- Sun drop

- Old habits die hard

- His lil' mama

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

I'd match you up with

Nishinoya Yuu, Karasuno's Guardian

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Sun drops

The reasons why I paired you

- SUGAWARA WON'T LEAVE MY MIND AND HE'S ONE OF THE RUNNER UPS XD

- My first thought was Nishinoya but Ushijima and Sugawara said "No ❤️"

- But in the end, I choose Noya!

- You both would just be so cute! Like Yes please

- To him it doesn't matter that you are taller. HE LOVE YOU FOR YOUUUUUUUUUU

-He might be loud and energetic but he really respects your boundaries

- Though, you might have to take care of him more than the other way around, it's a good dynamic

- VERY BALANCED DYNAMIC RIGHT HERE

- You both if often just joke around and it's entertaining really

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Old habits die hard 

Random head canons

-You and Noya would have two day SPECIFICALLY for date time and/or Sharing time

-Those two days depends per week and schedule but there has to be TWO days

-In these days you both would just share your thoughts and feelings

-Noya, being a libero, has a tendency to be observant so he’ll know when you’re down

-He’ll joke around with you to lift up the mood but he will turn serious if needed

-C U D D L E S are a must for dates!

-He doesn’t care that you are taller than him, he actually loves it! (He loves being big spoon tho!)

-JUST LET HIM LOVE YOUUUUUUUU Like please

- He will do anything for your attention, (please just pay attention to him)

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

His Lil' mama

“Lil’ mama! My team wants to meet you. Up for it?” Noya asked his taller lover. He then wrapped his arm around her waist as waited for her answer. “If you want too, sure! I don’t mind,” She replied with a smile. “That’s great! Let’s go!” He then said as he dragged her to the gym. “Wait! Like right now!” She replied as she tried to keep her balance. “Yes! Like right now~” Noya said enthusiastically. Some students stared at the taller female in pity. Nishinoya maybe a well of guy but with someone so shy at first glance, it’s hard to imagine their relationship. “Oh c’mon now babe! Don’t back on me now,” Noya said as he stopped. “I just really want to prove to the guys that you exist and not just a replacement for our goddess!” He declared as he held her hand. “I love you more than the goddess!” He added as he kissed her hand.

The greenish grey eyed girl blush a bit and looked away. The whole school can see how whipped Noya is for this girl. As much as it was a surprised for everyone on how Noya got a girlfriend but at least now Kiyoko has one less thing to worry about. “Let’s go rolling thunder to the gym so I can show you off to my pals,” Noya said as they continued but with a slower pace this time. Once they both reached the gym, everyone froze as they realized that the female was way taller. “That’s just sad. Noya is shorter than his own girlfriend,” Tsukkishima teased. “AND SO? I LOVE IT THAT WAY!” Noya barked. “This is my lil’ mama! My love! MY ONE AND ONLY SO DON’T STEAL HER AWAY!” He added as he smirked. Now his girl was behind him, kind of regretting the decision of coming but it made him happy so it was worth it. “Hello there,” She said with a small wave.

“WOW! NOYA-SAN! HOW DID YOU GET SUCH A BEAUTIFUL GIRL??” Hinata asked as he looked at the female. As time went by, the libero and his lil’mama got along with everyone. It was a bit strange at first as Noya has a girl now. And he isn’t all over Kiyoko like he used to but he still is Noya. The team enjoyed the presence and aura of the two. It was somewhat comforting. Once the whole get together and practice ended, Noya walked his girl home. “So, what did ya think? I’m pretty cool on court, ya?” Noya asked as he looked at her eyes. “You were awesome~ Can I watch your practice from now own?” She asked as she hook their arms together. Noya blushed a bit and smiled brightly. “Of course you can, Babe! No one’s stopping you,” He then said as he kissed her cheek. “Plus, having you there, I have my own cheerleader to keep me motivated,” He added as he chuckled. “So I won’t be a distraction?” She asked teasingly as she remembered what happened a few moments ago.

“OKAY LOOK I WAS ADMIRING YOUR BEAUTY AND FORGOT I WAS ON COURT!” Noya said as he huffed. “Plus, I receive the ball anyway. So I did my job,” He added with a soft smile. And then he knew that she was the one for him. Forever and always, that’s what he believes.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Author's note

I'm sorry if it took so long! I was at school. But I hope you enjoy this one and thanks for requesting~

[untitledtallgeesepodcast]

There were a total of five OSTs released for Gundam Wing (the fifth was dedicated to the music of Endless Waltz, which will not be covered in this post or this playlist). Caitlin asked if I (Cathy) would create a playlist of my favorites. I didn't think she expected I would also write a novel. But here we go.

Let’s listen to some of the music of Gundam Wing!

(All song titles will be described with their English name and also the strangely romanized Spotify name.)

There are three main categories of Gundam Wing OST songs: (1) shoot 'em up fighting tracks which usually feature loud riffs, drums, and blats and blares coming at you at the same speed and frequency of mobile suits firing pointlessly at the Gundams, (2) instrumental, orchestral songs meant for the intermission period of a ballet that was never written or performed, or (3) synthy stuff with saxophones that wouldn't be out of place in a dingy rainy bar scene of a tame movie from the 80s. Most of the really recognizable tracks are in the first OST. OST 2 tends towards less interesting instrumental waltz-like stuff, Sanq Kingdom ballroom music as I've termed it in my head. They're fine, tolerable pieces of music, but you don't hear them and instantly think "Gundam Wing." By the time you get to OST 3, you're digging into the really deep cuts of Gundam Wing OST tracks, some of which I don't remember being in the show at all. (OST 4 is almost entirely character songs.)

We open with two of the best OPs—nay, songs—to have ever been made, "Just Communication" and "Rhythm Emotion," both by TWO-MIX. "Rhythm Emotion" was not, as you may have imagined, a mid-season swap-out. It was only used for about 10 episodes, and you may have even forgotten what it sounded like until just this moment, but "Rhythm Emotion" is no slacker. With alien, wintery synths that make you feel like you're soaring through the sky and between enemy mobile suits, this is one of those songs you would hear heavily remixed for knock-off DDR machines in arcades for years to come. The breakdown is cheesy, overemotional, and yet gives me the same goosebumps I would feel, years later, when listening to Love Live's "Snow Halation." Its more accomplished older sister, "Just Communication," dates itself from its opening note, but it owns its place in time and history unapologetically. Timeless, instantly recognizable, and eminently singable, you could, as Caitlin says in Episode 1, play this in a karaoke room full of randos and you're guaranteed to have someone scream along. There are some songs that make everyone feel like the star of their own shounen anime when they hear it, and "Just Communication" is one of them. Turning it up full volume in your car is like blasting "Take My Breath Away" while speeding on a motorcycle with a leather jacket. You are invincible through all 4:20 minutes of this song.

After that, perhaps one of the most famous instrumental tracks from the series: "The Wings of a Boy that Killed Adolescence / Shisyunki wo Koroshita Syonen no Tsubasa." (That boy is Heero Yuy. I know you know that, but this OST makes it explicit with its last instrumental track, "Code Name Heero Yuy," which is just another version of this melody.) There are a lot of songs like this, fighting tracks that hurry along at a clip, heroic but a little bit anxious ("When the Dragon Swims / Ryu ga Oyogutoki...," "Break Out," "Scattering Left Light / Kakusansuru Zanko" which barely sounds like music and is clearly hoping to be the soundtrack to your next laser tag game). I want to call out among them "Mission Accomplished / Ninmu Suiko," which has a last half that is so tied in my head to the world of Gundam Wing that when I hear it, I am instantly transported. It's almost a letdown that it's just an OST track, because it builds up such amazing tension that it releases just as quickly. "Mission Accomplished" is a bridge between these energetic tracks and more headbang-y, hard metal type fight songs like "Use the Cloak of Darkness / Kurayami Karano Tsukai," one of my all-time favorite guitar riffs from the GW OSTs. A lot of OST 1 is full of this "Enter Sandman" type stuff, though you still get reprises in the later OSTs, like "Well-Planned Tactics / Butsuryo Sakusen." The back half of "Cloak of Darkness," though, is a completely different track, this time pure fascist military fantasy. A lot of OSTs were like this, two short BGMs together masquerading as a one- to two-minute track. I'm not sure if it was just more expensive to list out a bunch of 45 second tracks, or if Otani Kou just ran out of emo names for all of them.

One thing I didn’t realize until this project is that there are no less than five variations on Relena’s theme in OST 1 alone:

Soft Hair and See-through Eyes / Yawarakana Kami...

Inside the Girl's Heart... / Syojyo no Mune no Oku Niwa...

To Beauty, to Elegance, and to Noble-mindedness / Karen ni Yuga ni...

I Feel Like I Can Cross Even That Rainbow Bridge / Ano Niji...

As Relena Peacecraft / Relena Peacecraft Toshite

When you've heard one, you've heard them all, so I’m putting on "Soft Hair...,” the wonderfully 80s and slightly boozy "adult contemporary" version of it, completely with a Kenny G sax. The others feel much more pure and dignified, especially "To Beauty...," which I think of as "waltz music" as it shows up in many of the early series' ballroom scenes. ”Rainbow Bridge..." is a worthy remix/variant, and for another similar boozy 80s feel, also try "Coolheaded Bloodthirstiness / Reitetsu na sakki" from OST 1. While I’ve left most of this playlist in chronological album order, I’ve moved up "I Believed We'd Meet / Kanarazu Aeruto Shinji” from OST 3. This track is not particularly noteworthy to me, but I leave it here as an example of how even later in the series, Otani Kou makes references to this refrain, even if it's not played note for note.

Because like any good soundtrack, Gundam Wing reuses themes and motifs. "Searching for Peace Buried Amid the Corpses / Shikabane ni Umoreta..." and "That Clown Doesn't Need Make Up for Tears / Sono Doukeshi..." share the same melody, only one is a fighting song and another is a mourning song. I actually like the rendition in "Hourglass of a Sad Color / Kanashimi-iro no Sunadokei" (also from OST1) better, but while "Hourglass" is a straightforward BGM track, "That Clown..." shows off one of the more interesting aspects of the Gundam Wing OSTs: its frequent blending of synths, cheesy sax, and more classic orchestral strings. You can hear it in second half of "That Clown...", but also in tracks like "Unknown Pressure / Michi no Pressure," or OST 3's " Behind The Scenes of The Blackout / Anten no Butaiura de," which is a typical "woe is me" orchestral track that is for some reason constantly interrupted by digital "beep boop" mumblings. Without that blend, you're left with a lot of grave-sounding tracks with bombastic Phantom of the Opera-worthy brass sections, like "Soldiers Who Don't Have a Gravepost / Bhyounaki Senshitachi" or "Legend of Zero / Zero no Densetsu." Not that those songs are bad, which is why I include the last of the instrumental tracks from OST 3: "Who Will Give Their Life / Darega Tameni Inochi," which takes itself very seriously and very earnestly, just like the show itself.

One of the other frequent moods of these OST is anxiety, perhaps no better demonstrated than "You Can Hear a Voice Calling the Soul /Tamashii wo Yobu Koe ga Suru", which has a guitar emitting screeches of existential despair. “Signs of Consciousness / Ishiki no Taido" is from this same school, but its second half is more "I am walking into a rave already a few minutes into what I know is going to be a bad trip," which is not really a mood I remember from the series itself. By the time you get to OST 3, you start venturing into tracks that wouldn't be out of place in a horror film. You can hear an example of it in "The Eyes of a Mobile Doll / Mobile Doll no Me," which is on this list because it sounds like a fever dream, but you could also check out "The Abandoned Horse of the Age / Jidai no Sutegoma," which is not on this playlist and has the same effect. Some of them, like "I Don't Like Fairytales / Otogi-banashi wa Sukijyanai," are inspiringly atmospheric, almost hypnotic. Is Gundam Wing horror? [Treize Voice] Yes, the Horror of War.

Some quick call-outs in the odds and ends group: “Tokimeite Harmony” is the 3x4 theme, a literal duet between a violin and a flute, and it’s there for that reason and that reason alone. I could not tell you for the life of me where in the series “Yasuragi no Hitotoki...”, “Kizuna,” “Sonzai Syomei,” or “Kioku no Gyakuryu” come from, but they sound like beautiful tracks from a video game I’ve never played. Similarly, “That Day Was The Last Day I Saw Your Smile / Anohi Saigo ni Mita Egao” is uncharacteristically fluttery and beautiful for a Gundam Wing OST piece, an almost Ghibli-esque track which nevertheless ends on an anxiety-inducing note of unrest.

And finally, the character songs. I leave you with one for each of the six main characters, and then a bonus.

Heero Yuy: "With Only My Words / Oredake no Kotoba de." Did you expect Heero's singing voice to sound like this? Neither did I. I have no idea why they thought this was a good image song for Heero. It's not. I leave it here because you must listen to it. The better "sounding" song is "Flying Away," which shows up in this CD later, but it doesn't give me the same dissonance as this one.

Duo Maxwell: “Wild Wing.” "Good Luck & Good Bye" is the superior song. (there's a little bit of Wang Chung “Everybody Have Fun Tonight" to it), but the sheer hilarity of this chorus (WILD WING BOYS!) means that i have to include it.

Trowa Barton: “Clown / Doukeshi.” What to say about this? This is a typical ballad, something you may play during a romantic moment of a kdrama or during the slow motion death scene in a Hong Kong film that would be released around the same time as GW was. I feel bad for Nakahara Shigeru who clearly is straining himself singing this. but it is nothing if not period accurate.

Quatre Raberba Winner: “Star’s Gaze / Hoshi no Manazashi.” Poor Orikasa Ai. Quatre’s voice is passably bishounen in the series itself, but it's hard to hide that his seiyuu was a woman when it came to the image songs. That said, her voice has a much fuller quality than her fellow pilots, and this is actually a decent-enough filler song. You could imagine debuting an idol maybe in the late 80s with this track.

Chang Wufei: “Knock at Tomorrow's Door / Asu eno Door wo Tatake.” If Wing were a kpop group, Wufei would be the rapper. You don't get to argue with me here. It's hard enough to imagine Wufei actually singing, but Ishino Ryuzou's singing voice also doesn't bear that much resemblance to the voice he adopted for the character. 

Relena Peacecraft: “Love is Not Crying Yet / Ai wa Mada Nakanai.” One of the most unexpected of the image songs is this bossa nova inspired track for Relena. Like Orikasa's ballad, this song almost works as a real song, and the purity of Yajima Akiko's voice is incredibly charming, which makes it all that more surprising that she's actually best known for being the seiyuu to the eponymous Shin-chan of Crayon Shin-Chan.

I do not include the image songs for Zechs and Treize, simply because they're boring. Both of them are extremely well-known and popular seiyuus, who have since done a number of musical projects. You can tell that they will fare better at that endeavor than Trowa’s seiyuu, but there's really nothing interesting to say about their songs. As always, the men of Gundam Wing are shown up by their female counterpart: Lady Une's "Brightness & Darkness" is positively anthemic and fun to listen to. Sayuri doesn't hit all the notes perfectly, and you can sense there is Fleetwood Mac / Stevie Nicks impersonator out there who could really knock this one out of the park, but if I were to keep one image song out of the whole bunch, it'd be this one.

[lovely-teeztaetae]

@strarrynighttone Heyyyy 💖💖First of all I want to say that I just love your writing 🥺💓it's just sooooo gooooooooood 💞and I wanted to ask if it's not to late to ask ship with Ateez pleaseeeee 👀🥺

Sooo I am 20 years old college student. I am 5'8 and have hourglass figure and have oval face. My hair is long dirty blond and eyes are green and pale skin type . I am INFP ✌🏻. Pansexual and proud. My zodiac is Leo 🌟.Oooo and I am hufflepuff 💛.Oh help me for describing myself bc I really bad at that, but let's gooo. Soooo I am really crazy from time to time. One moment I could be hyper active, happy other I am just depressed and anxious🙄. Oh I also really like caramel latte and most of the coffees and I like experiment making them... Welp I like cooking and I am decent at that. I also have resting poker face like my friends sometimes say that I scream bloody serial killer from that expression. I also give out good advices here and there, but never can't give advice to myself and follow it also I have really good sixth sense. I love my cat and dog sooooo much, but also love all animals. I really like to look out for make up at new looks out there. I love dancing 💃🏼 and I also like reading different kind of genres. When I meet new people I am really shy and reserved, because I don't really know that person and don't know what I can say and what I can't. With my friends and my family I am just crazy, playful, dirty minded, weird humour, dark jokes and all that jazz. I don't really intimate skin ship first, but if other person intimates it I will almost never turn it down . I love to cuddle and I think it's only times when I make first move. Also I sometimes can be whinny, and I cry easily when watching sad movies, but I don't really like crying in front others bc of my problems sooo I prefer to cry it out alone when listening to music. I am always ready to fight others if they insult or make people that are preciuos to me sad. But I don't really like to fight with people I love so I almost always comeback with apology and joke in hand (my mom just loves them). Most of the time I like wearing jeans and jumpers or blouses with jacket and sneakers or high-heeled boots and just on rare occasions I wear dresses and skirts, but I love fashion grungy style or vintage kind of styles. I love beaches and my dream is to live near one. I prefer night walks because I love to go star gazing.Most of the things I do almost always depends on my mood soooooo every time it's different things that I like to dooo like go out and put all night walk or just staying and reading and going to the club to dance. I think that's all I could get I think 😔

And again loveeeeee your blog ❤️❤️❤️💖💞💓 it's amazing and your are amazing hooooman💝

P. S sorry if there are any mistakes 🙏🏻🥺

It’s definitely not too late!

And with you, I see a lot of similarities with myself if I may :3

AND thank you so much for supporting me so much! It really does warm my heart to always get your notifications! :)

Okay, I now, with you, I see you as a very fun loving and kind person.

You’re creative, and can be an open book once you really get to know someone and are comfortable!

And sooooo, drumroll please ☺️

You gottttttttttt,,,,,,,,,

♡ Song Mingi ♡

WHAAAAAAA MINGI, your fellow LEO! (Which can be VERY sassy at times!)

So, I paired you with our lovely big baby because both of you seem to be very entertaining!

And your shy demeanour gave Mingi an easy interest in you!

He liked how different you were from him, and how when you all talked, you’d give back snarky replies.

From the first time you two met Mingi knew you were gonna be one HECK of a person, but little did he know what it would blossom into~

While you’re the sweet and caring person, Mingi is the straight forward one. Which makes you guys the perfect duo 🥺

You’re both cute and cuddly, and so people assume your guys relationship is super cuddly and sweet.

But when you guys are alone, it isn’t always necessarily like that, there’s much more than what meets the eye.~

♡ FIRE ♡

- song ; ‘Glamazon’ RuPaul -

- ( Reason behind song ) -

This song was chosen because I feel like it can be a representation of how Mingi sees Y/n sometimes! And it is a very over the top concept which I love~

~ Le fluffy ~

“Alright, what color next?” I asked Mingi while subconsciously wiping the makeup brush onto my already stained shirt.

“Hmm, what goes with green and black?” He asked looking into the small mirror.

“Nothing.” I simply stated with a small smile.

He studied the pallete closely before landing on a bright red color in the top corner.

“Oh, try this one!” He said excitedly.

I looked up at him with loving eyes and gave him a small smile before studying the color.

“We ll, it goes with your hair.~” I cooed, pulling up his hair and causing him to let out a small laugh.

Now just where to put it? I thought in my head, seeing as one eye was a neon green and the other a glittery black.

“You could do one of those cut creases.” He stated pointing towards the center of his eye.

“How do you know what that is and even I don’t?” I teased, putting some pigment onto the brush. I’d of course heard of it before, but never tried it for myself.

“I have no idea how I do that though hang on-“ I grabbed my phone but he quickly stopped me.

“No no! I can teach you and show you how to.”

“Alright.” I said with a cheeky smile, setting my phone right back down where it was.

~

“Ohh this one next!” I exclaimed pointing towards the glittery blue shade.

Mingi looked at me with small eyes and began to apply the color to my eyelid.

And now, here we were, with random colors now spread all throughout our eyelids and cheeks.

Mingi decided that what he would do is put makeup on my eye to teach me, and I’d just follow along and mimick what he did to me.

And now, we both looked a mess, with both of our shirts stained with colors we didn’t even remembering using, and streaks we didn’t even remember creating.

“I must say, you look very handsome.” I teased, cooing his now that now also had red on it.

“You too~.” He cooed back.

“But beautiful! Not handsome!” He exclaimed, widening his tiny eyes.

“Awe so so cute~.” My free eye twinkled at him as my other one was getting lightly patted on with the brush.

And his eyes twinkled right back at me with a wide smile.

“Soo Y/n, I lost my key again so I’m gonna-” San and Yeosang walked through the door with multiple snacks I’m hand and stopped upon seeing us on my living room floor in the mess of makeup.

“Wow.” San said with squinted eyes, and I started to feel bad. We were all supposed to meet at the movies later tonight, but Yeosang and San decided to come over to the house to finish a series Mingi and I had started a while ago, as we only had four episodes left in the season.

“Oh gosh, sorry we-“

“And you didn’t invite us?” He asked with a painful look.

“My eyes are literally huge, I’d be able to fit twice as much as Mingi.” Yeosang joked, setting the food down and having a seat next to us, followed by San’s equally as eager self.

Well, this ought to be fun.

- FIRE

I hope you enjoyed this ship! And again I am so sorry it took a while :(

If you would like me to fix or change anything with it just let me know! :)

[lisinfleur]

Mais uma pra série Poesia Brasileira pros Brazucas de plantão (E galera de Portugal também!) 

One more for the ones who like Brazillian PT music and poetry!

Free style translation:

Childish Song

It was a house not so funny Because of the lack of affection, it had nothing It had a roof, a pool, architect It just couldn't buy what was missing Well structured, sometimes full But even full, there was solitude The poet used to say: what is made of ego In the fool's street, causes frustration

Yeah, yeah, yeah Hmm, hmm, hmm Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Hmm, hmm, hmm

There was another house, a corner of the gueto Without asphalt on the street, out of the pattern Eternit (a kind of roof tile) perforated, small, narrow But if you want to come there is water for the beans (usually poor people in Brazil will put water in the black beans to make it thinner and increase it for more people to be able to eat). If Mengão (Flamengo Football Clube) will play, we can even parcel There will be meat, beer, soda and coal (material usual for a barbecue) The coins are counted, the energy always cut But faith wasn't missing, they had gratitude.

Yeah yeah yeah But it was so close to heaven Yeah yeah yeah But it was so close to heaven

How sweet was the dream there Even not having the best condition Everyone could sleep there Even with only one old mattress

But it was made with a lot of love But it was made with a lot of love

Life is a childish song It is, seriously, think, can you see? Beauties and beasts, castles and jails Princesses, Pinocchios, good guys and...

Yeah, I don't know if this is good or bad Someone tells me what in this world is real? The shooting on the school, the shirt on the clothesline The villain that is on the story or the one on the news? Tell me! Why the discoveries are lethal? The monsters became literal I used to play police and thief some time ago Now, nobody else plays It became too realist... The bullets became real, drilling Eternit To play we still want, but the blood stained the pike (catches) The end of the story is sad when the evil is not gone The boogeyman exists! Do not dare to play outside Because five little boys were out for a ride No drugs, no flagrant, no fucking disgrace The police triggered, pá pá pá pá (shot sounds) But no one, not a single one of them came back from there. There were more than a hundred shots in this story without a moral Directly from the bottom of the chaos I search for my docks in a world of dogs Humans are bad In the end, the evil results from the choice we have in our hands A childish song, for real But I'm sorry, old man, here the Beauty won't end up with the Beast Of course, here is everyone in its own space Crystal shoes step over the barefoot Rapunzel is beautiful, yes, with her dreads on the terrace But if the hare comes with a Juliet (a brand of expensive dark glasses) even the turtle quicken the pace. Why is it so hard to explain In the "ciranda, cirandinha" (Brazillian traditional childish song) the siren comes to "frame me" (a common way to express the police approach) Telling me to turn away without even explain From Costa Barros to Guadalupe (districts of the state of Rio de Janeiro in Brazil), a million of plots How can you explain to a child that safety makes you afraid? How do you explain that 80 shots were a mistake? (a reference to a crime where a black family was murdered with 80 shots and the military responsible said they have mistaken the car) 80 shots... 80 shots, man Carrousel of horrors, everything takes you as a hostage Reasons to cry even the ballerina has The beginning is already the end of the trail Even Alice realized it wasn't a wonder

There is something wrong with the world. Do not take your eyes out of the hourglass The human being is, in a summary, the cancer of the planet Society is sick and judges the color of the grimace God writes plans of peace, but he also gives us the pen And we? We write the life Iphones, the hunger, the dry The man, the drones, the envy, and the hurt The money, disputes, blood, and the trigger Cereals, mansions, condos, and guetos It's everything inside out, we failed in our cribs Our happy ending has to do with the beginning Only the beginning, only the beginning For planting to be free, the harvest is the price. Life is a childish song, see it for yourself We're Pinocchios, planting lies, and putting the blame on Gepetto We need to go back home...

Where it was made with a lot of love Where it was made with a lot of love