#horse race narrative

[o-the-mts]

Just like Hitler before him, Trump is benefiting from the fact that journalism is an incremental, daily business. Every day, reporters have to find something new to write or broadcast. Trump keeps saying dangerous and crazy things, but that’s not new. He’s said it all before. His impeachments and the January 6 insurrection happened years ago. True, he has been indicted four times and now faces up to four criminal trials, but that’s already been reported. What’s new today? For political reporters covering the campaign, that means usually treating Trump’s authoritarian promises as “B-matter.” That’s an old newspaper phrase that refers to the background information that reporters gather about a story’s subject. B-matter is usually exiled to the bottom of an article — if not cut entirely to save space or time. But the horrifying truth is that when Trump’s dictatorial ambitions are left on the cutting room floor as B-matter, America is in trouble.

The Media Still Doesn’t Grasp the Danger of Trump

[hischierlovebot]

I have no interest in the teams per se so now the finals to me is merely a matter of Matthew Tkachuk dragging his team to the finals despite everything and everyone Vs Jack Eichel spitting in the face of everyone to whom he wasn't good enough

[tenth-sentence]

We had the corner of a Pullman car to ourselves that evening as we whirled back to London, and I fancy that the journey was a short one to Colonel Ross as well as to myself, as we listened to our companion's narrative of the events which had occurred at the Dartmoor training stables upon that Monday night, and the means by which he had unravelled them.

"The Illustrated Sherlock Holmes Treasury" - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads

This Dark Descent

YA fantasy in a world of political unrest & war

a girl whose family ranch is overcome with debt, and her only option to save it is to win the dangerous magical horse race - but she’s not allowed to use an enchanted horse

and a girl who uses illegal magic without a license, and can make undetectable animal golems

both are brought together by a rich heir who has a plan to help them both - in exchange for helping him

Jewish folklore; demidemi & questioning MCs

[tarmac-rat]

Absolutely bonkers that we're now living in a world where people are holding up Cyberpunk 2077 to other video games and CYBERPUNK is the positive one in the comparison. (x)

[horsefigureoftheday]

I think one thing people can't stomach about horse movies is that every horse movie ever is achingly sincere. There are no whedonisms or bathos in horse movies. From stories that demand to be taken seriously, like Spirit (2002) and The Mustang (2019), to family movies like Racing Stripes (2005) and The Black Stallion (1979), to tragedies like War Horse (2011) and Black Beauty (1994). Horse movies demand that you let down your emotional walls and open yourself up to sincerity.

The only widely-enjoyed horse movie in recent memory is Nope (2022), but I think that's because of its director and high concept - people can excuse that it's a horse movie because, well, there's also blood and an alien. They can excuse that the emotional conflicts are centered around horses, that every action scene takes place on horseback, that the alien itself is, narratively speaking, an untameable wild horse because, hey, important director and spooky themes. When a big name or a slight thematic shift tells you it's okay to like horse movies, suddenly it's fine.

Blue is for boys, horses are for girls, but if we give the horses a blue filter we can pretend it's acceptable for everyone to be invested in horses.

[liberalsarecool]

The Republican candidate for President in 2024 is going to be a CONVICTED FELON.

This is not a horse race. The 'divided nation' narrative must account for Republicans picking the most flawed individual in history to use as a blunt object to destroy democracy and the rule of law.

[usa2024election]

None of the good things Biden and Democrats have done gets reported on. Why would it? Why would the media want an informed population? They prefer a horse race narrative with Diaper Don in the lead at all times. They miss him!

So spread the truth around. Flawed but decent is better than nothing but flaws and no decency in the maga moron trump.

[sashayed]

have you heard that jordan peele said steven yeun's character is the one that has the most in common with him. have you thought about how most of his cinematic career has been built around discussions of race and the traumas that come from racism. have you thought about how any media handling real and personal topics is a sort of emotional self-disembowelment on the part of the creator. have you thought of the glory and horror of being Seen. have you screamed

Have I? HAVE i. Have I thought about how Peele has discussed being objectified and tokenized on set, especially early in his career? Have I thought about what it's like to suffer real-life trauma in a space created for make-believe? Buddy, I haven't thought about anything else for days!!

I think one thing that makes this movie so visceral to me is that it's an exploration by a great popular artist on the human cost of making popular art. To me, the connection between Peele and Jupe is a link between the auteur and the cult leader — both are people consumed & defined by stories, people who are compelled by a narrative and feel an urge to spread that narrative to an audience.

And I am really impressed by how hard Peele seems to work to reject the cult leader in himself as best he can — to make art that enriches the lives of ALL THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE IT. Every interview is about how collaborative and present he is as a director. Obsessed with this Q&A for many reasons but this moment sticks with me:

KEKE PALMER: There would be moments where we’re going through different parts of this script, this story, from when we first rehearsed to when we were actually on set, or when we had an idea that happened that morning. I would be listening, my head would be down, I’d be listening to what Jordan’s saying, I’m like, man this is deep. And I look up and there’d be just this one little tear falling. Man, this brother’s deep. JORDAN PEELE: I’m not afraid to cry as a director. KP: And he’s chill! He’d be like, “That’s what happens” and tears are falling. I’m like, “Are you all right?” But he keeps going and he’s like “Yeah, yeah. So that’s the thing.” And then he just walks out.

To me, that reads as a person who is NOT JUST super smart and deep and creative etc but who is also aware every moment of how lucky he is to be doing what he's doing, and who is not ashamed of his own reaction to that gratitude. What's to be ashamed of? It's incredibly fun! He is having an amazing time! He's hanging out with people he likes and respects and coating actors with goop in the esophageal tube! What a job!

I wonder if, to be that thankful and that aware (and that collaborative), you have to have experienced the flip side; if you have to have been Jupe, at least for a little while. I wonder if the process of -- to some extent -- commodifying your own suffering (as capitalism practically demands that artists do in order to survive as artists) leads, almost inevitably, to a moment where you think, "I survived this horror and became a Star because I am the main character of reality: I am more special than other people, I have a special ability to communicate, I have a special destiny." That is a powerful story and a seductive one, but if you don't leave it behind, it will eat you and the people around you alive.

It seems to me like an extension of what Peele is exploring in Us--the notion that your contentment is entangled with someone else's suffering. Why you? Why not the person with all your qualities who for whatever reason never ended up where you are? Especially for creators with marginalized identities, right? "Am I occupying a space that should belong to someone else?" You can avoid that question by deciding that you have special individual qualities that make you the Chosen One, as Jupe does. Or you can accept that the question will always haunt you, that luck (LUCKY THE FINAL HORSE??) has no logic, and you try to spread your luck out and open your space up to as many other people as you can. Which you see Peele doing all the time! Gah!!

[pascaloverx]

BORN TO DIE

Summary: In a tense political setting, a Targaryen bastard working as a prostitute is summoned by Prince Aemond to the Red Keep. Aemond wants her to approach his dragon, Vhagar, as a test of her worth. Although he plans for her to claim another dragon in the future, her immediate challenge is to survive Prince Aemond demands while trying to stay alive.

Author’s Note: This work is set in the world created by George R.R. Martin, as depicted in his book Fire & Blood, and none of the characters belong to me. The story will follow some events from the series House of the Dragon (2022), but with changes to fit the fanfiction narrative. Therefore, it will not adhere strictly to the series' storyline. This fanfiction is a work of fiction and may contain inappropriate language, adult content, and violence. Readers be warned. I hope you enjoy the story and interact with it. I apologize if there are any errors in the High Valyrian sections; I used a translator and am unsure of its accuracy. Thank you and happy reading.

PREVIEW TWO

ONE

The journey back to the Red Keep is silent. Aemond communicates only through impatient grunts whenever your hand slips from his waist or when a trot from his horse makes you sway closer to him. The truth is, you’re unsure how to hold onto his waist without practically merging with him. And he’s impatiently racing toward the castle. Your mind is restless. How are you supposed to claim a dragon for Prince Aemond? And what if you fail and end up dead?

"When we arrive at the Red Keep, follow me without further interaction. It’s crucial that your existence remains a secret. We’ll depart as soon as possible to find some use for you. However, your clothes, as well as your smell, betray your origins as a smallfolk. If I’m to endure this journey in your company, it’s better that you’re not reeking." Aemond’s first words directed at you cause discomfort. Not that being treated this way is new, but the discomfort comes from the reality that, once you head toward Dragonstone with Aemond.

"It seems that the mighty Prince Aemond is forgetting that the only safe way to reach Dragonstone without being recognized is by looking like someone like me. Without that fancy attire or that fresh scent, as if you’ve just bathed. Even your silky hair gives away your position. I know how to be invisible, my dear Prince; the question is whether you can be too." You speak, resisting a fleeting urge to lean against Prince Aemond’s back and rest your head on his shoulders.

"I don’t recall asking for your opinion on the matter. Allow me to offer you the opportunity to remain silent before I silence you for good." Prince Aemond could easily embody the arrogant prince. You glance over your shoulder and notice him slightly turning back, likely wanting to gauge your reaction to his threat. You stare at him without saying a word, and you can tell he’s proud of having silenced you.

A few moments later, you arrive at the Red Keep. In that first moment, you question how you’re supposed to dismount from the cursed horse. Aemond has no trouble at all, though he nearly knocks you off in the process of getting down himself. He then begins speaking with some of the King’s guards. Unsure of what to say, you remain silent, still on the horse. You think that if you were to risk a deadly escape, this would be the perfect moment—though lacking any real riding skills, you probably wouldn’t get far. Just then, something makes Prince Aemond notice your hesitation.

“Do you intend to stay on that horse all day? We have tasks to complete,” Prince Aemond snaps, his tone sharp and impatient—his usual demeanor. You look at him, embarrassed. Perhaps he expected a prostitute to know how to dismount a horse with ease. After all, riding cock it's part of what you do for a living.

"I do not intend to waste any more of your time, Your Highness. But I must point out that if I have no idea how to get on a horse, how am I supposed to get off?" You look at Prince Aemond with a certain boldness, wanting to laugh at the angry expression that hovers over his face. He says nothing, simply extends his hands toward you and immediately pulls you down, as if his impatience has reached its limit. His cold hands brush against your skin, indirectly touching your thigh as he yanks you off the horse. You let out a small groan, not as quiet as you would have liked but nothing too conspicuous. The feeling of his hands on you sends shivers down your spine. He however, slightly drops you on the floor as if you were an expendable utensil. You almost stagger but manage to balance yourself as you watch Prince Aemond turn away. You fix your ragged dress as he tries to compose himself, before following Aemond who is already entering the castle.

Aemond orders a few servants to assist you in bathing and changing out of your current attire. He instructs them to provide you with discreet clothing and a cloak. Then he turns to you and whispers near your face, "When you’re done bathing, come to my chambers." You’re not entirely sure why he wants this or if he realizes you have no idea where his chambers are. But you nod gently, confirming that you will go to him.

A servant leads you to a secluded area where there’s a communal bathing space, with other servants also bathing. The sensation of being seen by strangers while you’re naked is a familiar one. Murmurs fill the air, and everyone seems curious about you, though no one speaks to you directly. Not even the servant assisting you. You imagine they’re afraid of Aemond. After all, you are like them—a servant. Moments later, you find yourself dressed in different clothes, delicate and unlike anything you’re used to wearing. The servant finally speaks when she notices your confused gaze, searching for Prince Aemond’s chambers.

"Prince Aemond's chambers are just beyond that door. Knock before entering if you wish to remain alive." The servant speaks softly with unexpected delicacy. You look at her as if relieved to finally know where his chambers are. You want to thank her but imagine that she would rather pretend that this interaction between you two never happened. So you quickly head to Prince Aemond's chambers, silently and taken by nervousness. The servant's words are still clear in your mind as you knock on the door.

Despite knocking on the door, there was no response. You find yourself compelled to enter Aemond’s chambers without an invitation. You fear his anger for not following his order to come to him after bathing. You enter quietly, taking calm steps and making no noise. The first thing you notice is how spacious the room is and how warm it feels compared to the cold water you just bathed in. You immediately think that being a legitimate child of a King must have unimaginable advantages, and you wish you could one day enjoy such comfort for yourself.

"Since you so imprudently entered my chambers, perhaps you'd like to assist me…" Prince Aemond says, appearing suddenly in front of you, which startles you. But it’s not exactly his presence that frightens you. What frightens you is the fact that he is naked. Completely naked, just with his hair loose, even without the eyepatch. Immediately you turn around.

"Your Highness, what kind of assistance do you require from me?" You speak almost as clearly as you can. You have just seen Prince Aemond's cock. And despite your familiarity with cocks, you were not prepared. For a moment, you hope he doesn't misinterpret your reaction.

"I require your assistance to bathe. Do not let your imagination deceive you; I have no intention of having you as a woman in any situation, neither now nor in the future," he says, his tone dry, leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. He truly seems to disdain you, yet he prefers your assistance over that of any other servant in the castle. You nod slightly, acknowledging that you understand he does not desire you, and then turn to approach the bathtub where Aemond has just entered. You need to crouch but manage to assist Prince Aemond as you take the sponge and begin to wash his body.

"Prince Aemond, do you really intend to leave your dragon here and come with me to claim another dragon?" you ask, trying to gently wash his body with the sponge while he seems lost in his own thoughts before your question interrupts him.

"Certainly, it is a risk. But leaving a prostitute I do not trust to seek out a precious asset like a dragon, whether alone or accompanied by one of the Kingsguard, seems foolish to me," Prince Aemond says, observing you with his remaining eye as you touch his back and neck with the sponge. The scent of flowers from the bathwater fills the air, creating a palpable tension between you and Aemond.

"If you do not trust anyone around you, your nights must be quite restless. I may not understand what it means to be a Prince, but it seems lonely not being able to count on someone to do what you expect of them. At least you seem to trust Vhagar, since you’re leaving her here," you say, turning to wash the front of Prince Aemond, positioning yourself face-to-face with him. He then grabs your wrist and pulls you closer to him. His remaining eye seems to bore into your soul as you face him, the scar over his other eye drawing even more attention. You don't understand the reason for his sudden proximity, though you can guess that you must have irritated him.

"Your curiosity about my feelings is an inconvenience. Whether my nights are restful or not is of no concern to you. Whether I trust or distrust those around me is irrelevant to you. The only matter you need to focus on at this moment is that you are to claim a dragon on behalf of the rightful King Aegon II. Now, you may leave my chambers. A servant will show you where you will be staying for the night. Tomorrow, we shall depart for Dragonstone," he says with a stern demeanor. You sense that you have touched upon something deeply personal. You set the sponge aside in the bath and, without further words, proceed to find your lodgings for the night.

The following morning, you are roused by a servant who informs you that Prince Aemond is awaiting your presence. Your body aches from having slept in a corner, far from the scrutiny of any significant figures in the castle, as per the Prince’s instructions to remain as inconspicuous as possible. You are provided with a piece of bread and a bit of water to refresh yourself, and then you are prepared for departure. A cloak is draped over you to aid in disguising your appearance.

You are then escorted to the castle’s exit, where you find Prince Aemond waiting with a stern expression. He is clad in a hooded cloak, his hair presumably secured out of sight, as no strands are visible. He briefly glance at you before looking away, as though there is something he wishes to convey but is unable to express, or perhaps it is merely an illusion of your mind.

"It appears you are appropriately attired for the occasion. However, there remains one item missing," Prince Aemond states as he assesses your appearance from head to toe. While you do not fully comprehend his intent, you infer that this might be his way of offering a compliment.

"Pray, Your Highness, what am I lacking?" you inquire, your tone tinged with irritation, which is understandable given the discomfort of your previous night’s rest. Prince Aemond responds with a faint smile and proceeds to grasp your hands, binding them together with a rope. The unexpected nature of this action leaves you momentarily stunned, and he appears to take a certain satisfaction in ensuring the rope is fastened securely, rendering escape impossible.

“Now, you are tied to me,” Prince Aemond declares as he secures the other end of the rope to his own waist. You cast him an angry look, fully aware that this must be an act of retaliation for the previous night. After a deep, frustrated sigh, you accept your predicament, realizing that this journey with Prince Aemond will test your limits in every conceivable way.

[mariacallous]

The best part about Bill Clinton's speech at the DNC was when he dropped the truth-bomb that out of the 50M jobs created in America since 1989, Democrats are responsible for 49M of them and Republicans are only responsible for 1M. Local news stations are fact-checking that Bill Clinton was right. The MSM are completely ignoring it because it doesn't feed their horse race narrative.

https://x.com/PettyLupone/status/1827006726006243763

[zeldadiscussions]

The repeated use of the specific word imperialism in fandom discussions of TotK really bugs me because like… we know what imperialism looks like, right?

Genocide either by murder or assimilation, leadership that is either of the conquering race or loyal to it generally for personal gain, control of the conquered’s resources, and a social climate where the conquerors are considered superior.

But in this Hyrule none of the other races had their cultures erased, they aren’t governed by Hylian leaders and the local leaders’ first priority is taking care of their people, they manage their own trade affairs, and Hylians don’t constantly subject others to put downs about their race.

If a Hylian man dares enter Gerudo Town without the Chief’s permission, they kick him out or put him in jail. That’s how much control the Gerudo have over their own territory and how little being a Hylian matters if you mess with them.

Rauru is accused of hoarding power but he literally gave his secret stones out to the other races and they remain in possession of them to this day.

Basically the only time the other nations seem to actually follow Hyrule’s lead at all is when facing common threats or working towards common goals. Hyrule only ever meddles in other lands affairs either to lend them aid (Link and Zelda fighting for everyone, the folks at Tabantha Bridge Stable providing disaster releif to the Rito, etc.) or requesting aid from them (Rauru and Zelda asking the Sages and Champions to help them fight Ganon[dorf].) They lead like a team leader leads.

Sonia and Rauru didn’t found an empire.

They founded an alliance.

I know I’m beating a dead horse here but to my eyes at least (for now) there is zero solid evidence of Hyrule exerting control over the daily lives of non-Hylians or stealing their resources, two major defining traits of imperialistic rule. Hyrule is at the head of the alliance, yes, but an empire isn’t the only system of governance that has one group or individual at the helm of a coalition. The difference is in the details and the details here are that Hyrule leads the others but it does not dominate them, and that is key.

The only empire in the game would have been the one Ganondorf was trying to force on everyone and that was pretty bluntly depicted as being a bad thing. How can we say it’s pro-imperialistic if the main conflict is preventing the rise of an evil empire?

You can’t effectively analyze a narrative by completely ignoring everything about it and its meta that contradicts a knee-jerk viewpoint. What is even the point of analyzing it at all at that point?

[apomaro-mellow]

Hear me out- the steve is confused by eddies references bingo, but its because eddie is wrong. I think people forget Steve knows star wars (as evident by the harrington/ henderson handshake), and I think it would be a cool subversion of the trope. I think Steve would know a lot and eddie would not be expecting Sports Star Harrington of all people to check him on his shit, so steve being confused when he gets something wrong that seems "glaringly obvious" but is actually some niche nerd trivia would be funny.

It was Steve, Robin, Eddie, and Dustin hanging out in the backroom of Family Video. It was nearing the end of Robin and Steve's shifts on a Wednesday, their slowest day. So they were hiding out here until the clock ran out. Steve was once again defending the ewoks as necessary to the narrative of Return of the Jedi. Eddie was an ewok-hater. Dustin was on the fence. Robin was of no opinion.

Switching gears, Steve decided to voice something else.

"You know what I don't get? Why is it that Obi-wan never considered that Leia could be a jedi?"

Eddie raised a brow. "Why would Obi-wan think for a second that Leia could be a jedi?"

"Why not?", Robin raised a brow. She didn't have a single horse in the race but was ever an instigator.

Eddie held his hands up. "I'm all for ra-ra feminism, that ain't the issue here."

"Then what is?", Steve asked. "Why can't Leia be just as good of a jedi as Luke? And why was it like Obi-wan just...it was like it never even occurred to him."

"Well why would it?", Dustin asked. "Luke's the hero, so of course it's his job to be the jedi and save the galaxy. Leia is just the chick. No offense Robin."

"Um, all offense taken", Robin tossed a Raisinet at him.

"I'd like Stevie here to explain his position", Eddie gestured a hand to Steve.

"So like, Obi-wan knew who Luke's father was, right?", Steve started. "That means this whole time, he must've known that Leia was his sister. Like literally from the beginning when this princess is sending him a message. So why is it that when he and Yoda are having their whole talk when Luke goes to save them he's like 'Luke is our only hope' and Yoda has to remind him there's another? Obi-wan should've already known Leia was related to Luke and thus Vader and that she could be the galaxy's hope too."

Dustin's jaw went to the floor. "Did you just-"

"Robin, Dustin, you need to leave the room", Eddie said, unbuckling his pants.

Steddie bingo under the cut

[comicaurora]

I watched Castlevania: Nocturne the otger day and liked it a lot less than you seemed to, so I want to hear a more detailed opinion if you have one. Am I in the wrong to think it was more shounen and less "deep" in some way?

I'd say it's definitely more shounen. Introducing the "Richter can't do magic because unresolved trauma" thing right from the jump meant a Believing In Yourself powerup was pretty much inevitable, but I liked the execution of that scene enough that I didn't mind much.

It doesn't quite have the backbone of the original Castlevania, which was grounded so strongly in Dracula's apocalyptic grief - a motivation the audience is directed to find deeply understandable from minute one - that it gave the characters a solid thematic core to play off of. This let the writing stay pretty tight by letting Trevor serve as a foiling mirror for Dracula in their mutual disgust with the failures of human kindness, Sypha for Lisa in their altruistic use of their knowledge and their vilification for "witchcraft", and Alucard in the middle torn between worlds.

Nocturne is more loose and character-driven, but it still has a core theme - the argument over "the natural order" and how that plays into a fear of change from those currently on top. However, Richter doesn't really have a horse in that race, since his motivation starts and ends at Kill Vampires while everyone around him is more complex, trying to overthrow the aristocracy and free the enslaved and such. I think this makes Richter feel a little less important than Trevor was, narratively, because he sort of stands apart from the core philosophical debate at play. It took me a few episodes to get what his deal was and start caring about his self-actualization, and I think he's definitely got further to go. Possibly Alucard's presence in season 2 will give him more to play off of.

I think Nocturne has several independently interesting villains instead of one really good villain, which is a complaint I also saw about Castlevania season 4 - I liked Death just fine, but he really didn't work for everyone, and the secondary villains like Saint Germaine were much more interesting and complex. Nocturne does, however, pull off something Castlevania didn't as much, which is most of the characters acting on their own internal consistent motivation without cleanly falling into the "good guy" or "bad guy" box, causing them to slide into and out of conflicts and alliances depending on the circumstances.

I feel like Bathory is kind of a weak core villain with almost no human-level motivations or ideas beyond General Villainy, and the extent of her development being a darkest hour shonen villain powerup/frieza transformation doesn't help much, which is why I'm kind of holding out hope that they just bite the bullet and bring back Dracula. He's the nemesis from the Castlevania games, and while they gave him and Lisa a happy ending in Castlevania season 4, I don't think they need to keep him on the bench forever. It's been 300 years, Lisa is almost certainly long dead again and Dracula doesn't need to be full Mad With Vengeance Burn Down The World to still be a credible problem in need of a little Belmonting.

I had fun with season 1 of Nocturne with the understanding that the first four-episode "season" of Castlevania wasn't representative of the final shape of the story either. Sypha's character, for instance, was very flat before she and the gang went on their season 2 bonding adventure, not much more than some banter and infodumps. I think Nocturne did solid setup of the cast and the theme they'll be unpacking, and it has lots of room to explore these characters in interesting ways once they energy-ball-tennis Bathory out of the way first.

[manitschilly]

My notes taken while reasearching the Zelda Timeline lol, mostly cannon a little headcannon in places. Also my Zelink rating aren't how much I like them it's how likely they are in the narrative.

Power: Din ->Demise->Ganondorf. The Gerudo give birth to a male every 100 years, and it's only ever been Ganon. The 100 year system got screwed though because Ganon keeps not actually dying. Pigs. Fire. Red.

Courage: Farore-> heros spirit (fierce diety?)-> Link. Only the hero's spirit is reincarnated in Link, so he's not the same person. Not related at all, except for Twilight Princess where Link is a descendant of Ocarina of Time Link. Wolves and horses. Lighting. Green.

Wisdom: Naydra -> Hylia-> Zelda. Every Zelda is actually Hylia reincarnated through a consistant bloodline. Loftwing. Ice. Blue.

-The three goddess create the earth and the triforce, and that's their only relation to Demise, Hylia, and the heros spirit. They're not reincarnations at all, more like patrons. (Unwillingly in Dins case). Din created the land, Farore created life, and Nayru created order.

-possibly Zonai and Sonia and Rauru founding the first kingdom of Hyrule. This would imply there is a Ganon unconnected to Demise sealed for the rest of everything and a dragon Zelda floating around. Rauru and Sonias light and time magic start off the royal family.

-a long undisclosed time with robots for some reason

-A battle between the Hylia, Demise and the races in Hyrule breaks out over the Triforce. Hylia takes the Hylian kingdom into the sky to protect them, then becomes a Hylian to protect the triforce. She also created a sword with a spirit named Fi with her godly power. With Demise sealed for now, she waits to be born.

-Sheikah are probably started around here, as like a Hylia cult.

-First incartion is Skyward Sword, when Hylia chooses to be born as Zelda and chooses Link as her champion to hold the heros spirit. They fight Demise who then curses them to reincarnate forever, and establishes his own incarnation, kicking off the rest of the series. Hylia, now Zelda, is shown to use her time powers. Link, Zelda, and a few Hylians from Skyloft restart the kingdom on the surface.

Link and Zelda are in love, Zelda chosing Link specifically for that reason. This could imply that Hylia and the heros spirit are soulmates in some way, and every incarnarion after is an extension of that. They don't end up together every time, but that makes it even more beautiful and heartrenching. (Just to specify, Links aren't related so don't worry about it) 10/10 Zelink potential this shit is cannon.

Kikwi present. Impa is there as part of the Shiekah. Impa seems to be either a repeated name or a title given to Shiekah warriors meant to protect the reincarnation of Hylia, not their own incarnation.

-another very long time gap

-evil sorcerors are after the triforce which is hidden in the sacred realm. A new temple of time (after the one in Hylias time used to hide the sealed Demise and Zelda) is built around the master sword, which has been holding in Demise this whole time.

-Another long time passes. Zelda's descendants have become the royal family. Princesses are named Zelda after the original incarnation (note, they aren't all reincarnations, just named after her). There is still a lot of magic floating around the bloodline.

-sheikah are sworn to Hylias blood and therefore the royal family.

-Hyrule is again in danger, a special species called the Minish come from the sky to protect them with a special sword, which was then wielded by an incarnation of Link.

-a bitch named Vaati wants light powers, turns the current Zelda (actually an incarnation, you know because there's a hero) to stone, and that times Link turns the Minish's sword into the 4-sword. Zelda is the light power source, as the light power is still in the royal family. 8/10 Zelink potential

Gorons present

-Another time skip

- the four-sword is used to defeat Vaati again by another Link and Zelda incarnation. 6/10 Zelink potential

- time skip

- Giant ass civil war

- shiekah go into hiding but are still used by the royal family for sketchy shit. (Queue shadow temple 'nam flash backs)

- the first actual Ganondorf is born, or the second depending on if the Zonai are before or after.

- Ganondorf is born as king of the gerudo, and pretends to be allied with the king to gain access to the triforce which is still in the sacred realm, sealed with the master sword. This Link incarnation pulls out the master sword as a child and opens the sacred realm, allowing Ganandorf access to the Triforce, the triforce of power attaching itself to him forever. This also gave Link the triforce of Courage and Zelda the triforce of wisdom. The sacred realm becomes evil and Ganondorf is sealed in it. There's a lot of time travel and it ruins just everything.

Zora, Kokiri, Gerudo, and Gorons present.

Great deku tree dies and is reborn.

and now shit hits the fan

Fallen hero time line

- Link freaking dies and Ganondorf wins, taking the while triforce for himself. He still gets sealed in the corrupted sacred realm, but now he has the triforce. 0/10 Zelink potential long term, as Link is dead, but like 8/10 short term.

- time passes and homies keep going into the sacred realm to get the triforce but they never come back and monsters keep coming out. The sealed it again, at great cost of life and resources

- Agahim, some bitch, takes over the kingdom and the remaining sages to break the seal on Ganon. This reincarnarion of Zelda magically contacts the new Link. He kills Ganon and uses his newly acquired triforce to put everything back to normal. Now the royal family has the triforce. 7/10 Zelink potential. Same Link then has Links awakening acid trip. I'd knock down the Zelink potential but Malin like isn't real so.

Zora present

- same Link then has another acid trip but this time it's real, ending with Ganon being brought back to life as a mindless force of chaos. Ups Zelink to like 8/10, and confirms existence of other kingdoms beside Hyrule that aren't in another dimension.

- triforce splits again somehow, power returns to beast Ganon

- time skip

- new Link, new sages, Lorule exists so that's fun, opposite Hyrule dimension without a triforce. Ganon is freed and eats a man probably. Confirms this Link and Zelda have their respective triforces. Upon returning to Hyrule, the triforce is again in 1 piece and peace is restored to Hyrule and Lorule. 8/10 Zelink potential and like 9.5/10 Hildio potential.

- same Link goes to Hytopia, yet another kingdom in the same dimension.

- time skip. Great time, royal family again has the United triforce.

- King breaks up the triforce and sends Courage to the next Link incarnation, hiding its physical location from all except his daughter Zelda. New King puts that Zelda under a sleeping spell and regrets it. Tries to rule with just power of Wisdom but it doesn't go great.

- time skip

- same Ganon steals the triforce of power, new Zelda and Impa. New Link, without triforce of Courage, again postponed Ganon

- same Link is helping Hyrule not burn down, when suddenly he is given the triforce of Courage mark. He wakes up the old Zelda. I'd say the Zelda born in his time is the actual incarnarion, the older Zelda just a princess. 9/10 Zelink actually but like also he's a little weird with old Zelda to little odd but okay.

Child timeline

- Link defeats Ganondorf and is sent back in time to relive the childhood he didn't have. He warns the royal family before Ganondorf can gain any power and therefore the events of Ocarina of Time never happen. Link leaves on a horse to look for Navi and has a Majoras mask acid trip. 10/10 short term Zelink and like 2/10 longterm, but also one of my favorite dynamics. This is one of the tragedy timeliness, where Zelda loved him before sending him back in time (Sheik was a simp). He could have ended up with this Zelda, but he probably didn't because his descendant in the next game isn't royalty like at all. Scrodingers Zelink, if the next Zelink happened then this one didn't, but we don't know if it does.

-Ganondorf is banished to the Twilight realm, where the wizard sent there a Hella long time ago got busy. He gains power with a guy named Zant who takes over the Twilight realm and breaks out to Hyrule. The princess of the Twilight realm named Midna finds the new Link incarnation, an actual descendant of the last one and holder of the triforce of Courage.

Link is trained by the like ghost of the hero of time, who is an adult and missing an eye. The hero of time means nothing to this Hyrule because Ocarina of Time never happened.

They kill Ganondorf finally holy shit and the Twilight mirror is shattered, forever separating the two places.

Like 8/10 Zelink potential, frick Illia freaking hate her. I follow that Zelink both had a crush on Midna but she's gone sooooo

Gerudo, Gorons, and Zora.

-big ass time skip

-new Ganondorf is born finally, but is like immediately sealed with the 4-sword by a new Link. I don't think there even is a Zelda so 0/10 Zelink potential

Adult timeline

-this is what's left when Link gets sent back in time. Ganondorf is sealed in the corrupted spirit realm and the triforce of Courage shatters into 8 pieces, master sword is returned to the temple of time. 10/10 horribly tragic Zelink poor Zelda good lord.

-time passes without any reincarnations.

-Ganon escapes his seal in the sacred realm but there's still no Link or so Hyrule is effed. The gods flood Hyrule, society continues on mountaintops that are now islands and Hyrule is frozen underneath a giant ocean. The Triforce of Wisdom is split in two between Zelda, who stays on land, and her father, in the frozen Hyrule.

-Time passes badly

-Gannon escapes to the surface and kidnaps "girls with pointed ears", or descendants of Hylia. A new Link appears and gets the master sword from the frozen Hyrule, but it doesn't do shit until he fixes the triforce of courage. The king appears and bestows Links pirate captain the other half of the triforce, as she's reveled to be this time's Zelda. The triforce is restored and the old Hyrule gets genocided. Ganon is sealed, not dead, and Link and Zelda/Tetra go to establish a new hyrule. 10/10 Zelink potential this is some good shit. Rito, Kokiri, and Gerudo present

-same Link and Zelda have a bit on their quest, no lasting consequences except for 11/10 Zelink potential. They discover New Hyrule.

-some train shit in New Hyrule, new Link and Zelda have a soft romantic adventure with no lasting consequences except no more trains. 10/10 Zelink it's the whole plot.

Gorons present

After or before

-all the three timelines get just apocalyptic and society is just like gone, so the Zonai come from the Heaven's and with their arrival comes the merging of the three timelines.

-OR potentially Rauru and Sonias time is actually before Skyward Sword, as Ganondorf isn't actually a reincarnation. This would imply that every other game happens inbetween Rauru and Sonias time and Breath of the Wild, which i like better but it makes some leaps in logic, however it also explains the existence of both time and Light magic in the royal blood line.

-time passes

-Hyrule is once again reformed OR formed for the first time, by the last of the Zonai, Raruru and his Hylian wife Sonia. The incarnations are still going strong, so Ganondorf is born but their kind of hosed because there isn't a Link or Zelda OR the incarnations havent started yet and this is the first Ganon, before he was tied to Demise.

Luckily, either way, a Zelda comes from the future, and after a battle ending in the death of Sonia, Rauru uses himself to seal Ganondorf away and Zelda turns into a dragon.

-Time passes, the kingdom grows and hyrule castle is built over Ganondorf.

-Time passes and either all the other games happen or nothing happens, either way Zelda is still a dragon.

Definitely after

-a Link and Zelda are reincarnated to fight Calamity Gannon, whatever is left of the monster Ganon that was never killed in the other timelines. They, with the highly technogically advanced Shiekah, build weapons and postpone his return. We don't know much but like 8/10 Zelink I don't know could be cool. Shiekah go off, creating shrines and all types of shit.

-abreak off of the shiekah called the Yiga form, which is like the shiekah but for Ganon instead of Hylia.

-a new Link and Zelda are born. They are so far ahead that they no longer have a grasp on the incarnations before them besides a few sparce legends. They know Ganon is coming back but they don't know who he is. They know Zelda is suppose to have powers, but they have no idea how she's gets them. Link finds the master sword in the lost woods, guarded by the great deku (the 2nd actually the first one died somewhere).

So they fail, whoops. Link dies and gets put in a Sheikah shrine for healing while Zelda holds of Ganon for 100 years.

-hyrule collapses and turns into almost a tribal society very unconnected.

-Link wakes up, wrecks havoc, and defeats Calamity Ganon, freeing Zelda and starting the reconstruction of hyrule.

10/10 Zelink potential. We got the before when Zelda cononicly loved him but we don't know Links feeling, and then Link might remember her and its like a reuniting thing and it's lovely or he doesn't and they fall in love again. Or possibly he didn't love her before and either way its a saga and his rubber band was in her study in "her" house thats all I'm saying.

-7 years, hyrule is being rebuilt by Zelda.

-A sickness is spreading through Hyrule, Zelda and Link go to investigate and find what's left of the Ganondorf Rauru fought, who is either the first ganondorf or the most recent one. Zelda is sent in the past to Sonia and Rauru, along with the destroyed master sword.

Zelda is turned into a dragon and lives out thousands of years as one, potentially during every other game in the series. If so, the cloud layer established by Hylia was probably around until the upheavel, hiding her.

-The Upheavel happens and the world gets a little more cracked out, but Link defeats the Ganondorf and Zelda is turned back to her Hylian form. 11/10 Zelink potential and the dragon bit is so upsetting.

The three goddesses are present as dragons. Are they dragons? Are they just manifestations of their power? Idek but it's sick.

What the hell is Beedle? I read a fanfic once that he never dies because he helped Hylia once and it was really good so I highkey stand by that.

Sages kinda hop around, usually there's 7, one for each major group, even though not every race exists in every game. Are they extensions of the gods somehow?

(Rito, Zora, Gerudo, Gorons, Hylians, Shiekah, and whatever weird shit they got going on that game usually just Zelda)

One main issue with the Zonai before theory is that there's all the races when the Rito specifically doesn't seem to exist outside of the adult timeline.

There is a possible Kikwi, Kokiri, Korok pipeline.

I prescribe to the fierce deity as the original hero incarnation because it's just fits well and I'm obsessed with him, but it it doesn't really matter either way. I also read a fanfic once where the Fierce Deity loved Hylia and fought with her against Demise, but he died and the hero's spirit in each Link is what's left of him. Also read one where he saved Farore once from Demise and that's why he's specifically blessed with courage. Might have been the same one. I cannot remember it is 5:30 am and I haven't slept yet.

Ears are cool and plot relevant. The closer they are the Hylia the pointier their ears are, they get less pointy over time. Which adds to the Zonai being before because they got the pointiest ears. Also Gerudo ears get more pointy as time goes on.

Din gerudo pipeline? That's interesting. Farore and Nayru don't really have anything like that. Hylia has the Hylians but that's it.

Great Deku tree? Who? How? Why is he still kicking? Kind of adds to the Before Zonai theory or else he would have had to survive whatever apocalypse destroyed everything

In summary, somebody off me and therapy is probably a good investment.

[tanadrin]

What does a "correct" or "effective" response to fascism look like? I see people call for this a lot, in response to Trump here in the US but also the the Euro far right, with the implication that no government or major non-right political party is currently responding the right way. And I don't really know how to parse this sentiment except as a vague call for preemptive political violence. Which, fair, is maybe what we needed, and we're going to pay the price for it.

I think the correct response to fascism includes 1) calling it by its name, and not trying to normalize it (especially in media coverage), 2) freezing out far right parties and not going into coalition with them *or* trying to coopt their voters by adopting elements of their policies (this generally doesn’t work anyway), and 3) continuing to make a political issue out of fascist politics and not just trusting that if you keep to the high road your intrinsic virtue will be rewarded.

That third point looks different in different contexts—in the US for instance, I think there are a lot of meaningful actions the Biden administration could have taken, for example in response to Trump’s conviction, by saying something like “we are not going to give the convicted felon intelligence briefings.” This is both an appropriate response to events *and* a substantive action that keeps his status as a felon a live political issue. Mutatis mutandis you can take a similar approach to politicians in Germany with far right and Nazi ties.

What you can’t do is let this stuff just be part of the rhetorical background noise of campaigns—then it becomes part of the he-said-she-said horse race coverage, and (as US media has currently demonstrated since the debate) coverage might just take the unhinged and violent faction as doing its unhinged and violent thing and only cover what it sees as novelties in “normal” politics, without putting those events in a larger context. Personally I think that’s a huge failure of the political media that they bear serious culpability for—but as a politician you are not in fact the passive subject of media narrative. You have some power to shape it, if you take proactive action.