#horrible pregnancies

[mrs-snape5984]

„You’re not alone, together we stand. I’ll be by your side, you know, I’ll take your hand…”

“Just stay strong, ‘cause you know, I’m here for you…” (“Keep holding on” by Avril Lavigne)

I decided to set a trigger warning on this post: Miscarriages, high risk pregnancies, ICSI treatments, traumatic wish for a child journey, hysterectomy. So, please feel free to skip the following x paragraphs, if you feel triggered by these topics. Thank you.

Those of you lovely people of Snapedom, who know me and my way of blogging about Severus and my personal hardships might have noticed, that I’m mostly venting about ME/CFS and the crumbs, which are left from my former life. Since I can’t do much about it right now, I decided to “fix” another one of my countless issues…an internal wound, which desperately needs to heal!

As some of you might remember, I’m a mother of three wonderful children. There are my eleven years old twins and then there’s my six years old daughter. My pregnancies were the result of a long and painful journey of ICSI treatments, several miscarriages, way too many tears, about ten surgeries - due to Endometriosis and myomas - which eventually ended in a hysterectomy four years ago.

My desperate wish for a child led me to some decisions and life choices, which I probably wouldn’t have made, if I would have been clearer…maybe more stable in my whole mindset. One of these choices was a totally over rushed marriage to a narcissistic man, who made me believe, that he wanted the same. Gosh…I’ve been so desperate and so fucking stupid! Well, at least I got my twins because of him.

I went to the appointment for the transfer of the embryos on my own. He didn’t want to join the procedure…and I should have known, that he was already saying “goodbye” back then.

The pregnancy was rough. I had to lie in bed from the 8th week of pregnancy until they were born as premature babies in the 29th week of pregnancy. The last 4,5 months of pregnancy, I had to stay in the hospital…fighting for my babies’ lives all on my own. The father of them had decided, that he didn’t want to be a father anymore…wow…

I don’t want to go further into details about this phase of my life…at least not yet. I commissioned my friend @alinearthp for this project and asked her for several drawings of the different phases of my journey to become a mother. This artwork will be the start of my healing process…and I’m incredibly grateful, that you’re doing this for me, Aline! I know, that you’ll need time to draw all these wishes of mine, but I’ll be patiently waiting for each of your breathtaking pieces of art, my dear!

So, for the next couple of months, Severus will accompany me on my path through this phase of my past…just like he did back then, when I spent months in a hospital bed in “Trendelenburg” position. During this period of my life - and to be honest, in so many other phases of the past 21 years, as well - I clung to my imagination of Severus in order to feel less helpless and alone. His resilience and determination have always been my inspiration to keep going through all these hardships, which life kept throwing at me. He’s the love of my life…and he will forever be the guiding light in my darkness.

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

[trans-androgyne]

Yes, trans men and mascs have historically been subjected to less public violence and ridicule than trans women and fems. Is having privilege really the only reason you can think of for that? Have you considered that they had less ability to be publicly visible in the first place? Please remember that the lack of autonomy women have historically been granted also applies to transmascs. They would have been considered the property of men. Spousal rape wasn't illegal everywhere in my country until 1993. How easy do you think it would be for forcibly impregnated transmascs to transition? For abused transmascs in general? Do you think they were all even allowed out of the house often without a man? There are so many stories of transmascs being forcibly institutionalized for being trans. Is that situation and otherwise being quietly abused and erased really so much better than hypervisibility?

[dykedvonte]

I haven’t really talked about Jimmy’s hallucinated version of Polle but I do subscribe to the idea that that is the closest thing to Anya’s true thoughts and feelings along with the representation of the hypothetical baby.

Text color, the whole horse attraction and monsters based on pregnancy/female anatomy, it joking about calling Jimmy old man? It’s both Jimmy purposely trying to ignore Anya and what he did but also not being able to cause he knows, in the back of his mind it all links back to her. But the closet thing he can accept about it is that it fostered something that would be undoubtedly linked to him.

It’s not exactly Anya and it’s not exactly the child. It’s his manifestation of all the things he would’ve failed doing for it and have already failed to take responsibility for. He failed as a decent person, a captain and he would’ve failed as a father which are all things Anya would subtly acknowledge throughout the game in little ways.

It specifically being Polle, the mascot to the Pony Express is more likely a call back to how the pony express is used to mean things that were never going to make it or were rearing for an end. It’s all symbolic and it’s all in Jimmy’s head because he refuses to acknowledge the real person and events his subconscious is basing it on.

[moongothic]

Not sure I've ever actually verbalized this properly before but what genuinely makes Crocodad a theory I'm emotionally invested in, is how like

Like the kinda implication here is that, because Ivankov's HRT is MAGIC and gives you a functional cis body (it's all about that wish fulfillment baybee), Crocodile could not have transitioned until after the baby was born (since he wouldn't have the bits for it anymore). Which begs the question of, why would he not have transitioned before ever even getting pregnant? And to me, unless Ivankov just didn't get their DF until it was "too late", like. It really would just make sense if Crocodile never figured his gender shit out until he got pregnant. Like IDK, maybe I'm just projecting my personal pregnancy repulsion onto him, but like. Watching your body change against your will into something very traditionally feminine and do irreversible damage to your body (pregnancy hormones be scary yo) as some parasite grows inside you and having these deeply gendered expectations just thrusted upon you (not even like directly by other people, but just the societal expectation that's been taught to you since forever that you now kind of assume you have to live up to). Like that sounds like a horrible, dysphoria inducing nightmare to go through, something that could very easily become the straw that breaks the camel's back (or, the sledgehammer that cracked the egg)

And then you add the fact that Crocodile could not have held any negative feelings towards the baby, otherwise the brat would've been aborted. Meaning despite all the horrible shit he was going through internally, Crocodile still loved that child and was willing to go through hell for it

But then you add the fact that, as I've discussed in the past, it's very likely the baby was going to be left in Garp's care from the very begining. Like that might've been the plan from the get-go. So Crocodile was carrying a child he knew he would have to give up and would probably never see again.

Like. All of that is so emotionally fucking devastating.

But then!! You get some hope because hey, Crocodile figuring his gender shit out and being able to get help from Ivankov would mean he could escape the Dysphoria Hell at the very least, like there's that bit of relief, right?

But then. Fucking. Dragon??? Is he bi, or did they get divorced because Dragon's not into men??? Is the Dragodile Divorce real???

'Cause if so. Like. Again, to re-iterate. Crocodile went through 9 months of nightmareish dysphoria hell to birth a child he loved but knew he could never see ever again, and while he got to have that dysporia alliviated thanks to Ivankov, doing so also resulted in him losing his husband.

Like even just conceptually that is so fucking

Like yes Crocodad has so much potential to be hysterical and an absolute clown show, and my speculation about The Details of it are indeed just speculation and could be completely wrong.

BUT DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I'M EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN THIS SHIT. DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW FUCKING SAD CROCODAD MIGHT BE

[boytumms]

Think fairies could be storks? They'd be surrogates, flying with their bellies heavy and large depending on how many babies their clients ordered, and when they arrive, just pop on their doorsteps or crash on the couch if their clients are kind enough. Extra points if the clients just do this just to watch the fairies pop their babies out or just delay the birth as much as they can by feeding the fairies or giving him massages or smth

You know I would be ordering like a million babies just to watch the stork fairies push them out, maybe play with them and torture them a little too hehe. Especially if you could order multiples, imagine ordering triplets or more and making your stork fly all that way with a belly that possibly weighs more then he does (maybe they can still fly with the help of magic, but it would still be a long hard journey).

By the time they get to your home they'd be exhausted, barely have the energy to give birth. I might make some give birth as soon as they arrive, even if they're too tired to push. Others I would plug up, letting them "rest" long enough for the babies to continue growing in their tummies, until they're screaming for me to let them birth before they burst.

Or, maybe I'd plug them all up, and let each one give birth one by one, taking my time to enjoy each stork boy give birth while I ignore the rest and make them wait their turn, letting them suffer as they writhe and moan in agony, rubbing and clutching at their swelling tightening bellies.

Each boy has a harder and harder time giving birth after being bound up for so long, and the boy at the very end has the hardest, longest, and most painful birth of them all. After hours and hours of waiting, his belly has grown so much bigger, like a big swollen overripe fruit. Now, after suffering through so many fruitless contractions he can't even muster up the strength to push. His belly bounces with the force of the babies inside him, nearly too big to come out at this point. He begs for help, the only way he'll be able to give birth now is if I help him push. I could give in and help him by squeezing his tummy to force the massive babies through his tiny hips while he screams and cries, or... I could watch him grow and grow until he's shrieking in agony around his swelling belly, watching him thrash against the unbearable pressure until his tummy can't hold anymore...

[ccbatman]

actually so sick how they made steph into a martyr for everything wrong with gotham when she lived her whole life trying to prove that she was everything right

[shithowdy]

just want everyone to know that i am irrevocably maternity pantspilled, i don't understand why they don't manufacture normal trouser bands like this. it is so fucking logical. our guts expand and contract all day.

i bought these the other day for general low-stress wear (they are a nice and gender neutral shape, up to size 20w us for these ones) and i am already buying another pair. sitting in every other type of trouser causes extreme nerve pain as the band digs in except this. i now can sit in a chair and know peace. if you have nerve damage or endo/pcos/etc or IBS bloating or just fucking hate the feeling of bands digging into your waist this is it. i am telling you. grabbing you by the shoulders and shaking you. ignore the branding and get ready for all your ads to think you are expecting, try the damn pants, and join me in peace.

[softsimming]

What's the difference between a crib and a bassinet? Please tell me it's pre-built.. Lorenzo's going to kill me if he has to put this together.

[crivalsduo]

c!dream gets pregnant in the horrible/happy au and c!techno goes nuts trying to make everything perfect 'cause he's heard being pregnant makes you want a really nice 'nest' so he's breaking out all the nice blankets and pillows and the softest clothes for dream.

meanwhile dream is wearing the same shirt he stole from techno for the past week and only likes one blanket and one pillow that's a little crusty with drool and he's got snacks hidden under it.

[preggomancer]

once again thinking about how sillygoofy it is that my brain must separate my kink and non kink interests so completely because my favorite character of all time is a classic complicated fucked up trans (TO ME) bisexual man who canonically has a child due to magical circumstances against his will and is repeatedly described as extremely attractive but if I think about him in any sexual way whatsoever makes me viscerally uncomfortable

[justsomeoneunordinary]

Izuna is totally the kinda guy to have a pregnancy kink all the while he fucking hates kids with a passion

Which leads to situations such as blurting out "Put a baby in me!" when things get heated in the bedroom, and Tobirama just. fucking stops in his doing and goes, "No? I've seen how you're with Kagami; I'm not putting a baby anywhere near you, least of all in you," successfully killing the mood with his deadpan reply

[merakiui]

Tw: slut shaming, incel!Idia, him being gross, noncon, size kink kinda, afab but crossdressing, etc

Imagine just bullying Idia daily when you game with him, calling his penis small repeatedly, this man had enough of your daily shenanigans, but the more he sees you the more he notices just how small you are compared to him to be just a normal male.

Your body is just so..... Feminine. Your frame is small but your thighs thick? Now he just has to test for himself, he bets that you were a slut who only likes getting gangbanged by the Savanaclaw students.

Come on? A girl crossdressing in an all boys school? We all know this troupe. He bets you are all loose from all the fucking you did,( little did he know you were a virgin all along, what non virgin would hang out with him daily anyway?)

He decided to take action against your mockery and pins you on the floor while you were distracted with your game,

"Hey prefect, tell me, why would a man wear more clothes around their chest?"

"W-what?! Get off me you tiny penis bitch, even squidward's nose is bigger-"

Idia wasted no time to strip you off your clothing, he was right after all, you were a girl, all girls are the same after all, it's their fault that no one wants to fuck him, you are just yet another loose slut.

He zip ties your hands then begins licking your cunt, this taste is quite addictive, but why isn't it all wet an soppy like in hentai? He attempts to shove a finger in but his single finger is getting clamped like crazy, no way..... You were a virgin? But no aren't you a slut?

He continues to lick your clit while his large hands keep your legs open, he stares at you, you really are a girl huh? How did he never catch that? As he did what hentai taught him you slowly gushed on his face, no longer fighting back from being all brain mushy.

He almost cummed in his pants but it's okay, you were meant to be bred anyway like the bitch you are. As he inserted his long dick you started to cry.

"Its too big, it won't fit. Can we stop this already?"

"Where did this your snarky bitchy attitude go? What happened with calling me tiny? No no, you're staying right here, this is all your fault. You finish what you started."

When he filled you to the brim, he can notice the massive bulge of himself inside of you, tiny you say? You were regretting your words right there, you started to scream and squirm as he thrusted.

It burns, it stings, it hurts, its feels good...wait what? You began slurring your words, you went from screaming no to screaming more. He finished inside of you.

White was oozing out, he took pics for later purposes. From that incident onwards Idia started to take action against you. You were converting from a brat to a cutie pliant kitten.

You do what he asks you to, like wearing a collar with his name on it, and wearing the skirts with tights you oh so despise. Every time you wanted to act out, he always threatened to share pictures of you and hack into the whole campus's phone just to spread it, maybe next time you should have watched your words.

UUUWUAAAAA IZUNA, THIS IS DELICIOUS OTL OTL OTL OTL

(cw: yandere, nsfw, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, implied captivity, non-con, pregnancy mentions, incel idia, misogyny)

And he’ll make you sit on his lap and cockwarm him while he’s gaming. Maybe he’ll make you wear a ball gag so you won’t be too noisy when he’s on vc. If you’re good and you don’t cum, he might let you take off that cute, revealing outfit you can’t stand. Maybe he’ll let you wear his hoodie. It’ll be so oversized on you. He might just fuck you in it. :) he probably uses you as a reference for when he’s sketching. He’ll stuff you full of all kinds of sex toys just so he can improve his anatomy or certain poses. Or he’ll want to recreate scenes from his favorite hentai.

And if you can just stop complaining and take his cock like the good kitten you are, he’ll bring you birth control, all that stuff girls need for their monthly periods, and anything else you might want. But that’s only if you’re obedient. He’ll dangle all of these good things in front of you because with the click of a button he can have them ordered to his dorm, but he can take them away just as fast. All it takes is one bratty comment from you and he might not let you take any birth control. He never bothers to wear condoms either because doing it raw is so much better. Idia has plenty of money and resources to care for a child (not that he’s truly ready for parenthood, but you’d look cute with a round belly and he’s always wanted to try pregnancy sex…), and if it’s you he wouldn’t mind it. But maybe that’s just his dick talking. Logical Idia says there’s no way he’d be able to take on that sort of challenge, but Idia when he’s buried to the hilt inside of you and you’re digging your nails into his shoulders thinks there would be nothing better than knocking you up and waiting for your belly to swell and your tits to grow a size or two and begin leaking. :)

That’s really all you’re good for, isn’t it? You should’ve known what you were getting into when you found yourself stuck at an all-boys academy. That’s basically a hentai waiting to happen. You’re basically signing yourself up to be a communal cumdump. Idia feels lucky he got to you before anyone else did. There are so many eligible bachelors here… there’s no way he can compete with them, but now he has you and he doesn’t have to compete. You may be a little brat when you aren’t stuffed full of cock, but at least he sees the real you when you’re under him, completely at his mercy and always melting at the slightest touch. He’ll condition his kitten well until you know exactly what to say and do when he expects it.

[moongothic]

Seen a few people too many discuss the concept of Dragodile Baby 2 and my hot take is that there's no way in hell Crocodile would ever detransition just to go through nine months of horrible dysphoria again, let alone go through pregnancy ever again (or allow Ivankov to even touch him, what if they died and weren't able to trans Croc's gender again afterwards? Hell naw, ain't worth the risk)

But this leaves an opportunity for a Funnier Option:

Dragon wants another baby? Sure, but it's his turn to carry it >:)

[mossytrashcan]

I hate how people justify bullying with “oh but they CHOSE to do the thing I hate! It’s a CHOICE” because I actually don’t give a fuck. I’m not concerned with them choosing to wear an ugly outfit, I’m concerned with you being a fucking dick

[poorlittleyaoyao]

A thing about trying to plot out QS canon-divergence fixit where the marriage is averted is that the obvious solution to “she was already pregnant before they knew the truth” is, well, end the pregnancy. The wider world doesn’t seem to know that she’d conceived prior to marriage, so can’t be more than a month or so along as of the wedding for it to be plausible. People have been inducing abortion in dire circumstances despite physical risk and moral stigma throughout history. QS has magic at her disposal and the means to remove herself from society unnoticed during the recovery period, and even if it’s taboo, is it more taboo than incest?

[moonrisemoonchild]

I have been watching a lot of Dan and Phil's old content and I just watched Dan's "DAN IS ON FIRE" video. I am in tears when he says "the best is still yet to come" and looking at where they were to where they are now. The best was yet to come. 😭😭😭😭

Someone make a gif set or video. Please. I am having feelings.