#horrible experience today 0/10 would do again | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

what-do-1000-swords-look-like · 4 years

Text

I normally try to keep things light on here and just keep it fandom-only. I mean, we all have dealt with enough this past year and the world can make all of us a bit weary at one time or another. But I want to talk about something here that I think is super important in the face of Walker premiering this week, and in light of Jared’s recent comments.

Trigger warning: there is mention of suicidal ideation below

So today was a little bit of a rough day for me personally but just really small stuff, like lazy co-workers and nasty callers, things like that. All stupid, small stuff. When that kind of thing happens and I find myself starting to get sucked into the bs or under a little bit of a dark cloud, I put on things that will make me laugh as background noise. Sometimes stand-up routines, sometimes podcasts, that kind of thing. The last couple of months, I’ve been replaying Jensen and Misha Jibcon videos, along with some from Jared and Misha or J2 once in a while. Today’s was Jensen and Misha’s 2016 Jibcon and while it helped perk up my mood as the two of them were hilarious (as always), a part of it caught my attention and well... it hit hard.

youtube

Misha talks about a mom and daughter who approached him at a past con (starts at 0:20) and the daughter mentioned how if it wasn’t for the show, she wouldn’t be here. And the mom agreed and was crying, which made Misha emotional as well.

I thought it over for a moment and then rewatched him talking about it again. It hit me especially hard because I know just what that daughter was talking about, what Misha then goes on to say and Jensen. As a human, as someone who has been there, as someone that knew others who had been there...it’s tough, to say the least. Personally, I couldn’t do what these guys do. I would be an emotional mess that needed to take a break every two minutes. So I give them credit, but more importantly, I give this girl and everyone who has had the courage to approach and tell these guys their personal stories even more credit.

But this... This is why people are upset with Dean’s ending and how his part of that whole finale went. Not just because his character deserved better (he did) and not just because it would have made more sense for the story they had been telling since season 10 (it would have). It’s because of this. The dangerous message that was given out by choosing this ending for Dean, a character who infamously had low self-worth, expected to die young, and had perpetuated suicide ideation within the story line more than once.

“At least my life can mean something.” - Dean

“And it didn’t before?” - Bobby

Especially with that line of dialogue from the death scene: “We always knew it would end this way for me” + the only time he gets any peace, any happiness is in Heaven? = HORRIBLE MESSAGING to those who identify with Dean and his character, possibly having had to deal with some similar issues and traumas

How horrific for a show that not only was aware of this but also encouraged the interaction with said fans that approached them to tell their stories and how they identified with the story/these characters, calling all of us the SPN Family. Right? That was my first reaction after the finale aired. ‘How could you do this to all of those who told you what Dean meant to them?’

The thing is, the actors (Jensen & Mish included) know this (how important this story and characters are to people) and they did things themselves outside of the show to acknowledge this (i.e. Always Keep Fighting, Random Acts, You Are Not Alone) as well as other issues and traumatic experiences fans were dealing with as Misha says above, how important the show and these characters are to the fans, the SPN Family. The show itself was very well aware of this importance, this self-identification that took place with Dean’s story, Sam’s story, Cas’ story, and the other stories presented in the series. These guys are front and center with the fans they interacted with and met with on a frequent basis. They know.

And like Sam has said to Dean in the show: “How can you care so little about yourself?”

So they all know. And what floors me is that they did do the right thing. They took it all to heart and they gave it their best, gave it their all, as much as they could have. They never forgot how important this was to people. Not just the cast or J2M. This includes the crew and yes, even most if not all of the writers. I know you’re probably thinking that’s not the case due to the dumpster fire finale we got, the one with the worst messages possible mentioned above, but here’s the thing: if you don’t see that episode breaking the 4th wall to let you know that this episode was not theirs anymore and it was the network’s (and it’s totally fine if you don’t), you at least know from that bridge crew shot and the message J2 both said that they do still appreciate their fans. What other series finale do you get one of those messages included the way they did it? And the writers did start moving Dean away from what they originally planned back in the early seasons to be Dean’s end. We see that starting as far back as season 10, beginning with that confession scene in 10x16. We even see Dean and Sam starting to break their toxic co-dependency. Lucifer says it in season 11 when trying to convince Sam to let him ride shotgun out of Hell to go fight Amara. “That’s not you anymore.” And he says this after revisiting when Sam sacrificed himself to save Dean and the world, which came after the scene of Sam and Amelia with the dog (and he didn’t look for Dean when Dean was in Purgatory). They were effectively trying to get the brothers to a healthier point individually and together, especially Dean. The point is, they knew.

But the network...well that’s a whole other ball game to put it nicely. They knew, too, but... We know by now that the finale was a backdoor pilot for Walker. We know how this network works. They are the ones who don’t care about the messaging they are putting out unless it’s an advertising message. This is why networks leave the stories to the creatives. They bankroll them and stamp ownership upon the content and that’s it. They are not supposed to get involved in the story being told, not to this extent at least. Because they are executives, people who look at numbers whether they be ratings or how much money made or expenses, contracts, etc. They don’t give a flying fig about the story and how people view the story (except that they’re viewing it) and as long as it doesn’t cause a massive uproar (i.e. D&D’s new show that just got cancelled by HBO this year) that will come back to bite them where the sun doesn’t shine.

So that’s why I think Jared’s comments, while it’s obvious that he’s parroting things the network would say regarding Walker and the end of SPN, hit so hard for some. Not just about the erasure of Eileen but also about Sam living on being Dean’s success story. That wasn’t a success story. Take all the other issues out of it, let’s pretend Sam is any other sibling on TV or IRL, and what would we say to how Jared is framing it? He lived his life well to honor his brother but you don’t call it a success story because that person is no longer there. That’s not success. And ten times out of ten, that sibling would prefer to have the one they lost back if they could, rather than wanting to honor them in the first place.

Jared, my dude, I know you probably gave this interview a bit ago and it was then released in a timely fashion but did we not just learn how powerful words can be in this country in the past two weeks? We all got a valuable lesson on how impactful our words can be, especially when we have a large platform. Especially, since you are a public figure, have done PR before, and know how you need to watch your words on social media platforms. Especially, since Always Keep Fighting and hearing how people/the SPN Family closely relate to Dean and to Sam yourself. I love you but please, think it through before you speak next time, especially when it comes to that part of the finale/story/ending.

To be fair, articles and magazines, quotes always get taken out of context during the interviews, but this...I was a little surprised by this. It didn’t eradicate my love for Jared but now after rewatching this video and thinking on it more, I see why people are angry, why people are pissed at him. Especially when it comes to Dean’s story. I have had my own rough patch as I’m sure some other people on this site have as well at one time or another, similar to that girl’s story that Misha talks about, and while SPN/Dean/Cas were not what helped me get through it, what did is very important to me. And it would hurt me deeply if someone made similar comments about something that is so personal to me and helped me through one of the darkest times in my life, basically diminishing the impact it had on me and something so deeply personal to me. So I can only imagine how that girl is feeling now, how most of those who hated the messaging behind Dean’s death and his ending feel.

The only thing I can say that may be a source of light for those hurting who identified with Dean, is that confession scene that Robert Berens wrote in 15x18. If you don’t ship Destiel, that’s fine. That’s not what I’m talking about. Listen to the words he says to Dean, we all know how important they are for Dean to hear, for his story. And not just because it helps him with Chuck’s end in the next episode. Not just because Dean may or may not love Cas back. Because Dean needed to hear all of that. It may be a painful scene for some to watch due to Cas’ death soon after, due to Dean’s obvious pain at the end of the episode, but that part, that is light and love and something worth holding onto. Not just for Dean or the show but also for yourself.

youtube

Dean may be a fictional character. It may be a fictional story on a TV screen. But it meant something to a lot of people, from all different walks of life.

#dean winchester #spn finale #spn #dean winchester deserved better #give better messaging to your viewers #how many times do we have to say it #dean's death wasn't shocking or brilliant #it was horrifying #always keep fighting #you are never alone #you are not alone #dean winchester ending #dean winchester death #horrible messaging #spnposts

10 notes · View notes

thefloatingstone · 5 years

Text

Last time I made a playlist of recommended youtube channels to enjoy while in lockdown or self quarantine, I focused on individual videos while also recommending other videos from the same channel.

I thought I’d make another list only this time I’m going to be recommending playlists or series on youtuber instead of just individual videos.

This is gonna go exactly like last time, so check out any of these that might seem interesting to you, and hopefully I can give you something to look into if you want something to watch but don’t feel like watching a Netflix or Crunchyroll show.

Last time I tried to put this under a read more break but it didn’t work and I ended up posting this long-ass post on everyone’s dash. Well I decided to do so again here. hit J to skip to the bottom of the post if you don’t feel like reading this whole thing. If you’re on tumblr mobile; why?

In no particular order;

Cinemassacre movie reviews and topics

All of you already know James Rolfe as the AVGN. I started watching him before Youtube was even a thing, before he was even signed on with Screwattack. Back when his videos could only be seen on his own website (or for some reason included on the free DVD you got with the local video game magazines). However, I eventually outgrew the outrage style humour of the AVGN episodes... but then James started doing Monster Madness where he would talk about his love for horror movies, and this where I learned about his vast knowledge about movie history and even films I had never even heard mention of before! I think it’s safe to say, he got me to be interested in movie history just as much as movie production and film as a viewing experience.

I recommend this playlist which is a hodgepodge of James talking about old horror movie franchises, talking about his first experience with Power Rangers as someone who didn’t grow up with it, or how Bob Ross is a childhood hero of his. It’s an excellent play list that’s really laid back but you learn a lot of stuff from it. James is very informed for the most part and it leads you to wanting to check out a lot of these things too, just because he’s so passionate about it.

If I ever get over my weird hang up about speaking out loud, these are the kinds of videos I’d like to make.

Vinesauce Vinny: The Neverhood

Vinny is by no means a new Let’s Player, having been on Youtube for over 10 years now, but I only started watching him a few months ago. I started with this playlist when I saw he was doing The Neverhood, a game I had heard about but never seen played before. The Neverhood is a bizarre game, as a point and click PC game from the 90s where the entirety of the video game was made with stop motion and clay. Something that sounds so insane you would say it’s impossible if not for the fact that it exists. The claymation itself is extremely well done, and the game has a really weird and absurd sense of humour. Just the strangest things happen in this thing. Now couple that with Vinny’s very dry and straightforward delivery and you have probably one of the funniest Let’s Plays I’ve watched in a long time.

This is also “short” for a Let’s Play series. With only 4 parts to it, the longest video only being a bit under and hour and 30 minutes. It’ll still take up a good chunk of your time, but it’s not as daunting as some of the other Let’s Plays I’ll mention on this list.

Team Four Star: Pokemon Shield Nuzlocke

Exactly what it says on the tin. The guys from Team Four Star play Pokemon Shield with Nuzlocke rules. They’ve done several Nuzlocke runs in the past, but I find the Pokemon Shield is the best one they’ve done. Especially since a lot of the needless fluff and grinding has been edited out. So unlike some of their previous series you don’t see a lot of Kieran and Grant running in a circle for an hour trying to catch a specific pokemon or trying to get to a certain level.

It’s also hilarious as they have a lot of “house rules” for the Nuzlocke often involving the exercise bike they.... have..... for some reason.

It’s very good and the gym battles become SUPER hype with the Nuzlocke rules and the music.

Baywatching

Having been going to a few years now, watch Allison try her very best to go through and do a video series where she talks about summarises every episode of Baywatch.

.... Ever. Single. Episode.

She’s not even close to done yet (and now she’s introduced Baywatch Nights AS WELL) but her trying to explain the batshit insanity of this show, it’s over the top characters, it’s insane plots and behind the scenes weirdness with all the enthusiasm and love for this slice of 90s is amazing. Please enjoy a good thick chunk of inside jokes, silly character voices, and a whole lot of ?????

Brutal Moose: Shenmue

Probably one of the most chill channels on all of Youtube, Brutal Moose aka Ian, prefers playing games you wouldn’t think would make for good Let’s Plays. And maybe they don’t, objectively. A collection of playlists covering Truck Simulator, Nancy Drew, Hidden Object games etc etc, spliced in with old commercials from drive in theaters from the 50s,60s and 70s. Ian’s Let’s Play channel is great for just putting on and letting play for company while you’re drawing or grinding in a video game or playing Stardew or something.

I recommend his Shenmue playthrough as Ian completely fell in love with the game and went on to play both the sequel and the newly released third game. Ian genuinely adores the weird voice acting and all the menial tasks and mini-games you can do. I watched this a lot in 2018 when I was going through a rough time, and it really helped me in a strange way to just put Ian on and listen to him talk to the chat and drive a forklift around for like 4 hours straight before going to Tomato Mart or wasting all his money on the gacha machines.

A Measured Response to “In Defense of Dark Souls 2″

At some point, big name youtuber Hbomberguy made a video called “In Defense of Dark Souls II”. I’m not subscribed to Hbomberguy but I enjoyed his video on why Sherlock (the BBC show) is trash. (come to think of it I should have added that to the first list). And it seems the video on Sherlock was really good and well argued.... and it seems his “In Defense of Dark Souls 2″ video... was not.

Using subjective language, bad representation of facts, or simply outright getting certain information wrong, Hbomberguy′s video on Dark Souls II is, at best, a man trying to argue that he likes Dark Souls II because it is “Objectively good”, rather than simply accept he likes it... because he likes it.

MauLer is kind of an asshole, but I have learned more about dissecting someone’s argument and deconstructing what they have said watching his response series than I have in any english or debate class I have ever had.

The response is over 10 hours long, but this is because MauLer takes time with each and every statement he takes umbrage with, discussing what is being said, discusses why it is false or dubious, and then compares with actual facts and research.

If you ever want to know how to to distinguish subjective opinion from objective fact in someone else’s argument regarding... ANYTHING really, I highly recommend this series.

I may not like MauLer as a person, but DAMN if he doesn’t know how to deconstruct an argument in a logic, emotionless way.

John Wolfe: Maize

Maize is a stupid game. a Stupid stupid game.

It involves sentient corn, and underground secret genetics lab, a Russian bootleg teddy bear that hates everyone, sentient corn, and a crumpet.

This game IMMEDIATELY went on my wishlist after watching this playthrough. Please watch John try and figure what the actual fuck is going on in this Monty Python-eque weird black comedy. It’s stupid, it’s weird, it’s bizarre and it’s honestly one of the funniest games I’ve seen streamed.

Hollywood: a Celebration of the Silent Era

This is not a youtube playlist. I mean it IS, but what this actually is, is a TV series released in the UK in 1980 covering the Silent Film era. As it was made in 1980, it includes interviews with many of the silent film stars who were often still alive during this documentary’s production. Each episode covers a specific theme of the silent movie era. One episode is about comedies, one is about WWI, one is about Westerns etc etc.

It’s a fascinating series, because it focuses on the silent era which, in modern day, I think many people unfairly think of as “those first few years of movies before movies really became a thing.” And that’s such a shame and really not true. The artistry, camera tricks, and raw nature of this early era of film making is so important and produced films which can still be watched today easily, possibly even easier than a few modern movies as often the very fact that the films are silent means they are universal, regardless of what language you speak.

I think an episode or two might have been turned to private or copyright claimed in this playlist, but I know if you do a search on youtube you can find the episode uploaded by someone else.

Diamanda Hagan: Bonekickers

Bonekickers is the show Mathew Graham made before he went on to work on the new Dr. Who. It is about archaeologists and it is God-fucking-Awful.

It is.... look. Ok. I like Archaeology a lot. But this isn’t a show that’s bad “if you like history” or “if you know things about archaeology”. This show is bad because it doesn’t make a single fucking lick of sense, all the characters are awful and terrible, and even if you understand what’s going on in the story you’re still going to be screaming “WHY????” at the screen as each new baffling stupid piece of the puzzle slots into place.

Diamanda Hagan has 0 time for this garbage and she’s going to walk you through each episode to show you how truly horrible this piece of garbage is.

Cry Plays: Ori and the Blind Forest

With Ori and the Will of the Wisps releasing recently, now is a great time to go and watch Cry playthrough the first Ori game. an absolutely gorgeous piece of work with a beautiful soundtrack and really likeable character designs and a sweet story, Ori is a great game to put on, sit back, and just let it wash over you. Cry’s playthrough is also great because although its a Metroidvania game, Cry fast forwards the parts where he backtracks for a long period of time, so you don’t get stuck watching him run back and forth as he tries to figure out where to go next or anything like that.

Cry also recently started playing the sequel as well!

If you enjoyed this list at all, please consider tipping me for a coffee

☕️ Ko-fi ☕️

#self isolation #Quarantine #Youtube #Links #Recommendations #Recommended #ask to tag #long post #No editing we die like men

55 notes · View notes

intersectionalism · 5 years

Photo

By Gabrielle Blair

Today, I tried something new. I wrote a Twitter thread for the first time. It’s about abortion, and how I think we need to approach the topic differently. I thought I’d share it here, because I know many of you don’t use Twitter.

So here’s the thread, broken up into small Tweet-size pieces. : )

I’m a mother of six, and a Mormon. I have a good understanding of arguments surrounding abortion, religious and otherwise. I’ve been listening to men grandstand about women’s reproductive rights, and I’m convinced men actually have zero interest in stopping abortion. Here’s why…

If you want to stop abortion, you need to prevent unwanted pregnancies. And men are 100% responsible for unwanted pregnancies. No for real, they are. Perhaps you are thinking: IT TAKES TWO! And yes, it does take two for _intentional_ pregnancies.

But ALL unwanted pregnancies are caused by the irresponsible ejaculations of men. Period. Don’t believe me? Let me walk you through it. Let’s start with this: women can only get pregnant about 2 days each month. And that’s for a limited number of years.

That makes 24 days a year a women might get pregnant. But men can _cause_ pregnancy 365 days a year. In fact, if you’re a man who ejaculates multiple times a day, you could cause multiple pregnancies daily. In theory a man could cause 1000+ unwanted pregnancies in just one year.

And though their sperm gets crappier as they age, men can cause unwanted pregnancies from puberty till death. So just starting with basic biology + the calendar it’s easy to see men are the issue here.

But what about birth control? If a woman doesn’t want to risk an unwanted pregnancy, why wouldn’t she just use birth control? If a women can manage to figure out how to get an abortion, surely she can get birth control, right? Great questions.

Modern birth control is possibly the greatest invention of the last century, and I am very grateful for it. It’s also brutal. The side effects for many women are ridiculously harmful. So ridiculous, that when an oral contraception for men was created, it wasn’t approved…

… because of the side effects. And the list of side effects was about 1/3 as long as the known side effects for women’s oral contraception.

There’s a lot to be unpacked just in that story, but I’ll simply point out (in case you didn’t know) that as a society, we really don’t mind if women suffer, physically or mentally, as long as it makes things easier for men.

But good news, Men: Even with the horrible side effects, women are still very willing to use birth control. Unfortunately it’s harder to get than it should be. Birth control options for women require a doctor’s appointment and a prescription. It’s not free, and often not cheap.

In fact there are many people trying to make it more expensive by fighting to make sure insurance companies refuse to cover it. Oral contraceptives for women can’t be acquired easily, or at the last minute. And they don’t work instantly.

If we’re talking about the pill, it requires consistent daily use and doesn’t leave much room for mistakes, forgetfulness, or unexpected disruptions to daily schedules. And again, the side effects can be brutal. I’M STILL GRATEFUL FOR IT PLEASE DON’T TAKE IT AWAY.

I’m just saying women’s birth control isn’t simple or easy. In contrast, let’s look at birth control for men, meaning condoms. Condoms are readily available at all hours, inexpensive, convenient, and don’t require a prescription. They’re effective, and work on demand, instantly.

Men can keep them stocked up just in case, so they’re always prepared. Amazing! They are so much easier than birth control options for women. As a bonus, in general, women love when men use condoms. They keep us from getting STDs, they don’t lessen our pleasure during sex…

… or prevent us from climaxing. And the best part? Clean up is so much easier — no waddling to the toilet as your jizz drips down our legs. So why in the world are there ever unwanted pregnancies? Why don’t men just use condoms every time they have sex? Seems so simple, right?

Oh. I remember. Men _don’t_ love condoms. In fact, men frequently pressure women to have sex without a condom. And it’s not unheard of for men to remove the condom during sex, without the women’s permission or knowledge. (Pro-tip: That’s assault.)

Why would men want to have sex without a condom? Good question. Apparently it’s because for the minutes they are penetrating their partner, having no condom on gives the experience more pleasure.

So… there are men willing to risk getting a woman pregnant — which means literally risking her life, her health, her social status, her relationships, and her career, so that they can experience a few minutes of _slightly_ more pleasure? Is that for real? Yes. Yes it is.

What are we talking about here pleasure-wise? If there’s a pleasure scale, with pain beginning at zero and going down into the negatives, a back-scratch falling at 5, and an orgasm without a condom being a 10, where would sex _with_ a condom fall? Like a 7 or 8?

So it’s not like sex with a condom is _not_ pleasurable, it’s just not _as_ pleasurable. An 8 instead of a 10. Let me emphasize that again: Men regularly choose to put women at massive risk by having non-condom sex, in order to experience a few minutes of slightly more pleasure.

Now keep in mind, for the truly condom-averse, men also have a non-condom, always-ready birth control built right in, called the pull out. It’s not perfect, and it’s a favorite joke, but it is also 96% effective.

So surely, we can expect men who aren’t wearing a condom to at least pull out every time they have sex, right?

Nope.

And why not?

Well, again, apparently it’s _slightly_ more pleasurable to climax inside a vagina than, say, on their partner’s stomach. So men are willing to risk the life, health and well-being of women, in order to experience a tiny bit more pleasure for like 5 seconds during orgasm.

It’s mind-boggling and disturbing when you realize that’s the choice men are making. And honestly, I’m not as mad as I should be about this, because we’ve trained men from birth that their pleasure is of utmost importance in the world. (And to dis-associate sex and pregnancy.)

While we’re here, let’s talk a bit more about pleasure and biology. Did you know that a man CAN’T get a woman pregnant without having an orgasm? Which means that we can conclude getting a woman pregnant is a pleasurable act for men.

But did you further know that men CAN get a woman pregnant without HER feeling any pleasure at all? In fact, it’s totally possible for a man to impregnate a woman even while causing her excruciating pain, trauma or horror.

In contrast, a woman can have non-stop orgasms with or without a partner and never once get herself pregnant. A woman’s orgasm has literally nothing to do with pregnancy or fertility — her clitoris exists not for creating new babies, but simply for pleasure.

No matter how many orgasms she has, they won’t make her pregnant. Pregnancies can only happen when men have an orgasm. Unwanted pregnancies can only happen when men orgasm irresponsibly.

What this means is a women can be the sluttliest slut in the entire world who loves having orgasms all day long and all night long and she will never find herself with an unwanted pregnancy unless a man shows up and ejaculates irresponsibly.

Women enjoying sex does not equal unwanted pregnancy and abortion. Men enjoying sex and having irresponsible ejaculations is what causes unwanted pregnancies and abortion.

Let’s talk more about responsibility. Men often don’t know, and don’t ask, and don’t think to ask, if they’ve caused a pregnancy. They may never think of it, or associate sex with making babies at all. Why? Because there are 0 consequences for men who cause unwanted pregnancies.

If the woman decides to have an abortion, the man may never know he caused an unwanted pregnancy with his irresponsible ejaculation.

If the woman decides to have the baby, or put the baby up for adoption, the man may never know he caused an unwanted pregnancy with his irresponsible ejaculation, or that there’s now a child walking around with 50% of his DNA.

If the woman does tell him that he caused an unwanted pregnancy and that she’s having the baby, the closest thing to a consequence for him, is that he may need to pay child support. But our current child support system is well-known to be a joke.

61% of men (or women) who are legally required to pay it, simply don’t. With little or no repercussions. Their credit isn’t even affected. So, many men keep going as is, causing unwanted pregnancies with irresponsible ejaculations and never giving it thought.

When the topic of abortion comes up, men might think: Abortion is horrible; women should not have abortions. And never once consider the man who CAUSED the unwanted pregnancy. If you’re not holding men responsible for unwanted pregnancies, then you are wasting your time.

Stop protesting at clinics. Stop shaming women. Stop trying to overturn abortion laws. If you actually care about reducing or eliminating the number of abortions in our country, simply HOLD MEN RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR ACTIONS.

What would that look like? What if there was a real and immediate consequence for men who cause an unwanted pregnancy? What kind of consequence would make sense? Should it be as harsh, painful, nauseating, scarring, expensive, risky, and life-altering…

… as forcing a woman to go through a 9-month unwanted pregnancy?

In my experience, men really like their testicles. If irresponsible ejaculations were putting their balls at risk, they would stop being irresponsible. Does castration seem like a cruel and unusual punishment? Definitely.

But is it worse than forcing 500,000 women a year to puke daily for months, gain 40 pounds, and then rip their bodies apart in childbirth? Is a handful of castrations worse than women dying during forced pregnancy & childbirth?

Put a castration law on the books, implement the law, let the media tell the story, and in 3 months or less, tada! abortions will have virtually disappeared. Can you picture it? No more abortions in less than 3 months, without ever trying to outlaw them. Amazing.

For those of you who consider abortion to be murder, wouldn’t you be on board with having a handful of men castrated, if it prevented 500,000 murders each year?

And if not, is that because you actually care more about policing women’s bodies, morality, and sexuality, than you do about reducing or eliminating abortions? (That’s a rhetorical question.)

Hey, you can even have the men who will be castrated bank their sperm before it happens — just in case they want to responsibly have kids some day.

Can’t wrap your head around a physical punishment for men? Even though you seem to be more than fine with physical punishments for women? Okay. Then how about this prevention idea: At the onset of puberty, all males in the U.S. could be required by law to get a vasectomy.

Vasectomies are very safe, totally reversible, and about as invasive as an doctor’s exam for a woman getting a birth control prescription. There is some soreness afterwards for about 24 hours, but that’s pretty much it for side effects.

(So much better than The Pill, which is taken by millions of women in our country, the side effects of which are well known and can be brutal.)

If/when the male becomes a responsible adult, and perhaps finds a mate, if they want to have a baby, the vasectomy can be reversed, and then redone once the childbearing stage is over. And each male can bank their sperm before the vasectomy, just in case.

It’s not that wild of an idea. 80% of males in the U.S. are circumcised, most as babies. And that’s not reversible.

Don’t like my ideas? That’s fine. I’m sure there are better ones. Go ahead and suggest your own ideas. My point is that it’s nonsense to focus on women if you’re trying to get rid of abortions. Abortion is the “cure” for an unwanted pregnancy.

If you want to stop abortions, you need to prevent the “disease” – meaning, unwanted pregnancies. And the only way to do that, is by focusing on men, because: MEN CAUSE 100% OF UNWANTED PREGNANCIES. Or. IRRESPONSIBLE EJACULATIONS BY MEN CAUSE 100% OF UNWANTED PREGNANCIES.

If you’re a man, what would the consequence need to be for you to never again ejaculate irresponsibly? Would it be money related? Maybe a loss of rights or freedoms? Physical pain?

Ask yourselves: What would it take for you to value the life of your sexual partner more than your own temporary pleasure or convenience?

Are you someone who learns better with analogies? Let’s try this one: Think of another great pleasure in life, let’s say food. Think of your favorite meal, dessert, or drink.

What if you found out that every time you indulge in that favorite food you risked causing great physical and mental pain for someone you know intimately. You might not cause any pain, but it’s a real risk.

Well, you’d probably be sad, but never indulge in that food again, right? Not worth the risk!

And then, what if you further found out, there was a simple thing you could do before you ate that favorite food, and it would eliminate the risk of causing pain to someone else. Which is great news!

BUT the simple thing you need to do makes the experience of eating the food slightly less pleasurable. To be clear, it would still be VERY pleasurable, but slightly less so. Like maybe you have to eat the food with a fork or spoon that you don’t particularly like.

Would you be willing to do that simple thing, and eliminate the risk of causing pain to someone you know intimately, every single time you ate your favorite food?

OF COURSE YOU WOULD.

Condoms (or even pulling out) is that simple thing. Don’t put women at risk. Don’t choose to maximize your own pleasure if it risks causing women pain.

Men mostly run our government. Men mostly make the laws. And men could eliminate abortions in 3 months or less without ever touching an abortion law or evening mentioning women.

In summary: STOP TRYING TO CONTROL WOMEN’S BODIES AND SEXUALITY. UNWANTED PREGNANCIES ARE CAUSED BY MEN.

The end.

——

Thread on Twitter

Thread on Design Mom

#gabrielle blair #design mom #abortion #reproductive freedom #viral #intersectionalism

476 notes · View notes

your-dietician · 3 years

Text

Kylian Mbappe the fall-guy as France lose penalty shootout to Switzerland and exit Euro 2020

New Post has been published on https://tattlepress.com/sports/kylian-mbappe-the-fall-guy-as-france-lose-penalty-shootout-to-switzerland-and-exit-euro-2020/

Kylian Mbappe the fall-guy as France lose penalty shootout to Switzerland and exit Euro 2020

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates – Getty

Kylian Mbappe misses the tenth penalty of the shootout and Swiss win 5-4

France looked to have it won in a four-minute period when they saved a pen and scored twice

But Swiss fought back with goals on 81 and 90th minutes to force extra time

World champions France have been dramatically eliminated from Euro 2020 on penalties after Switzerland recovered from 3-1 down to equalise in added time and then triumph in a shoot-out.

Kylian Mbappe missed the decisive 10th penalty, with Switzerland goalkeeper Yann Sommer diving to his right and denying the Paris St Germain striker. All nine players from either side had earlier scored from the penalty spot.

It is the first time that Switzerland have reached the quarter finals of a major competition since 1954 and, with France having been favourites to triumph at Wembley on July 11, the result throws the tournament wide open.

It was also the first penalty shoot-out the Switzerland have ever won and they will now play Spain in the quarter-finals in St Petersburg on Friday night.

Switzerland’s goalkeeper Yann Sommer with the key moment – AFP/Getty

Mario Gavranovic had earlier scored in the 92nd minute to follow two headed goals from Haris Seferovic, the second in the 81st minute, after France had briefly appeared to be cantering towards a last 16 tie against Spain.

France had scored three goals in a brilliant 18 minute second-half spell but, having begun poorly and fallen behind during a dreadful first-half, their attacking flair was ultimately undone by defensive frailties.

With Lucas Hernandez and Lucas Digne both going off injured in France’s final group game against Portugal, Deschamps was left without a natural left-back.

The solution was drastic. Rather than ask one of his squad to play out of position, he overhauled France’s entire system, switching to three at the back and bringing in Barcelona centre-back Clement Lenglet alongside Raphael Varane and Presnel Kimpembe.

It meant Benjamin Pavard and midfielder Adrien Rabiot operating as wing-backs and, for the opening five minutes at least, France did pose the expected threat.

Story continues

Kylian Mbappe, who had gone through the entire group phase without scoring, immediately surged at Nico Elvedi to the right of Switzerland’s three-man defence.

A corner was quickly forced, with Varane then evading the entire Swiss defence to rise in space for what was a free header from just outside the six-yard box. The Madrid defender’s execution, however, went horribly wrong and he skewed his effort well over.

The early chances seemed to give France a false sense of superiority and, with their players clearly struggling badly to adjust to their new system, Switzerland took control of the game.

Arsenal’s Granit Xhaka was excellent in his anchoring midfield role, while Stephen Zuber was constantly drifting skillfully into pockets of space.

France’s central duo of Paul Pogba and N’golo Kante, by contrast, looked lost without an additional midfield body alongside them and the entire team were displaying an alarming lack of energy and intensity. With Zuber proving especially adept at exploiting the spaces behind Pavard in the world champion’s unfamiliar formation, Switzerland took a deserved lead.

Zuber had surged to the byline down France’s right and, having effortlessly cut back inside Pavard, floated a pinpoint cross for Haris Seferovic. The Benfica striker duly shook off Lenglet with embarrassing ease and rose to head powerfully past Hugo Lloris into the bottom corner. Following Switzerland’s 3-1 win against Turkey in Baku to clinch their place in the knockout phase, it was a fourth assist in two games for Zuber. It could even have been 2-0 by half-time, with Xherdan Shaqiri then delivering a cross that Breel Embolo headed wastefully wide.

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates

Patrick Vieira, the former captain, was not the only one to wonder aloud at half-time whether there were some imposters in the France team.

Deschamps was at least decisive. Off came Lenglet. On came Kingsley Coman and the disastrous experiment with a three-man defence and wing-backs was abandoned. It meant Rabiot was now playing out of position at left-back and France did continue to wobble badly. Embolo again darted into the box and crossed for Zuber, who just hesitated long enough for Kimpembe to recover with a potentially match-saving tackle. Zuber remained Switzerland’s main creative threat and then drew a hopelessly rash tackle from Pavard. He tried to get up and continue but, with referee Fernando Andres Rapallini waving playing on, VAR correctly intervened to ensure a further check.

The replay confirmed that the contact did take place on the line of the penalty area and Switzerland were handed a further golden opportunity to extend their lead. Ricardo Rodriguez stepped up and, while his penalty did lack conviction, Lloris still did brilliantly dive low to his right to parry the ball to safety. It gave France both a lifeline and an urgently needed surge of adrenaline.

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates – AFP via Getty Images

The ball was played quickly forward by Mbappe to Karim Benzema who, quite exquisitely, brought it under control with the outstretched heel of his left foot, before bringing France level.

Another blur of passing followed, with Antoine Greizmann and Mbappe playing a quick one-two, before looping the ball across the six-yard for Benzema to put France into the lead. There had been less than two minutes between the goals.

France were now a team transformed and, having carved out a further flurry of chances, Pogba delivered the finish of the night and arguably even the tournament. Benzema’s shot had first been blocked but fell to Pogba in space 30 yards from goal and, having started his shot just outside Yann Sommer’s left-hand post, the ball curled spectacularly back into the top corner.

Switzerland, though, were still not done and France’s glaring defensive weaknesses remained. First Kevin Mbabu crossed for Seferovic to again head past Lloris and then, in the second minute of added time, Xhaka teed up Gavranovic for his equaliser.

And then came extra time and the shootout.

10:17 PM

What an evening’s football

We will get to the match report from Jeremy Wilson shortly. I am hearing that there may even be another match on tomorrow. If it’s half as exciting as the two games today then we are in for a wild ride! Thanks for following this one with us. Cheers.

10:14 PM

Regret to inform you

that the talk on ITV from the likes of Neville, G and Pougatch, M is that it’s all opening up for England… Oh crikey.

10:14 PM

Granit Xhaka

wins the man of the match award.

Granit Xhaka before the shootout – EPA-EFE

10:10 PM

What a tremendous day

of football that was! Croatia and Spain produced a highly entertaining match, and then this Swiss triumph over mighty France.

10:06 PM

Keano’s on form

as you would imagine. “I’m glad they got punished for that. You can have all the quality in the world, but if you don’t turn up with the proper attitude, it’s hard to switch it back on.”

He points out that Pogba lost the ball for the Swiss third, and indeed he did. Plenty of speculation as to whether Pogba can do it in a midfield two. That might be for another day, maybe.

09:55 PM

And here’s the save

Switzerland’s goalkeeper Yann Sommer with the key moment – AFP/Getty

09:52 PM

One of the many Swiss heroes

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates

09:51 PM

Here’s Mbappe walking up to the fateful spot kick

Kylian Mbappe of France makes his way towards the box to take his side’s fifth penalty – Getty

09:49 PM

France are out of Euro 2020

Switzerland looked gone for all money at 3-1, but they fought like neutral tigers.

09:48 PM

Poor Kylian Mbappé

Ah the poor kid. He ran up, he hit it hard and true, the keeper Sommer guesses, he dives and he gets a good strong hand on it.

Kylian hit it to the keeper’s right, but it wasn’t in the corner. It was the weakest of the ten penalties. The keeper was moving across and would have gone too far, but he managed to claw at it with his ‘wrong’ hand, the trailing left hand. Mbappé, as you would imagine, looks devastated.

Switzerland win 5-4 on penalties

09:45 PM

SAVED! Kylian Mbappe’s penalty is saved

France are out!

09:44 PM

Switzerland 5 France 4

Mehmedi runs up and slots it in the corner. Mehmedi scores!

It’s over to Mbappe……..

09:44 PM

Switzerland 4 France 4

Kimpembe the next man. Hits it with his left, top corner, never stopping that. Kimpembe scores

09:43 PM

Switzerland 4 France 3

Vargas steps up. Lloris guesses right, dives right, Lloris gets a hand to it but he has hit it just hard enough. Ooof, nervous moment. Varga scores.

09:42 PM

Switzerland 3 France 3

Marcus Thuram steps up. He looks a bit nervous. The keeper guesses right – dives to his right. But it was well struck from Lilian’s boy. Thuram scores

09:41 PM

Switzerland 3 France 2

Akanji of Dortmund…. runs up, waits for the keeper to move, and fires it into the corner. Akanji scores

09:40 PM

Switzerland 2 France 2

No mistake from Olivier Giroud, right into the corner, nicely taken. Giroud scores!

09:39 PM

Switzerland 2 France 1

It’s Schar of Newcsatle, slots it delicately into the corner, sending Lloris the wrong way. Schar scores!

09:38 PM

Switzerland 1 France 1

The Man United man stutters in his run up and mullers it into the top corner. Nobody’s saving that. Pogba scores!

09:38 PM

Up steps Paul Pogba

Looks to the heavens.

09:37 PM

Switzerland 1 France 0

Gavranovic of Zagreb blasts it into the roof of the net. Nice. Gavranovic scores

09:37 PM

Switzerland will shoot first

It will be Gavranovic, who scored their late equaliser.

09:36 PM

Here are the rosters

France: Lloris, Varane, Lenglet, Kimpembe, Pavard, Pogba, Kante, Rabiot, Griezmann, Benzema, Mbappe-Lottin. Subs: Lemar, Giroud, Tolisso, Zouma, Mandanda, Sissoko, Coman, Lucas, Ben Yedder, Maignan, Dubois, Thuram.

Switzerland: Sommer, Elvedi, Akanji, Rodriguez, Widmer, Freuler, Xhaka, Zuber, Shaqiri, Seferovic, Embolo. Subs: Mbabu, Zakaria, Vargas, Mvogo, Sow, Fassnacht, Benito, Mehmedi, Gavranovic, Fernandes, Kobel, Schar.

Referee: Fernando Rapallini (Argentina)

09:34 PM

Penalty shootout

Oh my goodness how exciting. Who do you think will win?

The French guys are in a huddle, all their players and support staff.

Benzema, Griezemann are already subbed off as you know – so that’s two who would have taken, I guess.

But for the Swiss, Shaq, and the two goal Seferovic have also gone so.

Lloris obviously has saved one pen already tonight.

09:32 PM

120 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Rabiot with a silly foul. Xhaka will be the one who gets the last chance… a direct freekick. Miles over.

It’s going to penalties!

09:31 PM

119 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

The French are the side with the ball, the ones asking the questions, probing, trying to open up one more chance… and here it is! Into the area, acrobatic leap from Giroud. Leaping save from the keeper but he was always getting there.

09:29 PM

117 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

If Pogba played like this on the reg, United would be winning the League every year. Mind you, what about Arsenal’s Granit Xhaka? He has been superb.

A minor lull in the last 90 seconds. Have thoughts turned to pens?

09:26 PM

114 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

What a pass from Pogba, just drills it with the outside of the foot on the volley into the path of Thuram, he crosses it… Giroud! Fluffs the shot.

Clive says of that quarterbacked pass: “Tonight Matthew, I am going to be Tom Brady!”

09:23 PM

112 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

It’s all France. Thuram HAS now come on as a sub. Bombs down the flank, crosses. It’s hacked clear in a panic. Corner. Cleared.

But it is the French who are asking all of the questions.

09:22 PM

111 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Now it is Pogba who carves the defence open with a surgeon’s pass… Mbappe puts it into the side netting. He let it come across himself and tries it with the left. He should have taken it early with his right.

Coman IS now coming off.

09:21 PM

110 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Some wonderful battling from Kante, powers forward, simply will not countenance losing the ball. Manages to play it inside to Mbappe, who scuffs the shot wide.

09:20 PM

108 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Pogba robs Mehmedi and powers forward, what a sight he is in full flow. Akanji barges him to the floor and accepts the justified yellow with no complaint.

09:18 PM

106 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Can Mbappe deliver? He had a couple of electric moments early on but has been kept pretty well boxed up by the Swiss.

09:16 PM

The Swiss will kick us off

Where’s your money?

09:15 PM

HT in ET: France 3 Switzerland 3

Good press from the French. They force and error, turn it over, and release Sissoko. He cannot play a meaningful ball in. That will be the end of the first period.

Bit of a quieter period after a madcap first 90. I fancy there’ll be a winner before pens are needed, personally.

09:12 PM

103 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Are the Swiss finishing stronger? They seem to be putting France under a fair deal of pressure. Mehmedi has done a great job since coming on as sub. He’s shot wide from a corner.

09:09 PM

100 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Players dropping like flies. Xhaka lunges in on Pogba, but comes off worse. He’s okay.

Sissoko breaks forward and tries an effort. That will land somewhere in Budapest. I love that story of the French lads who went to the wrong capital.

09:07 PM

98 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Thuram is coming on to replace Coman, who was himself a sub. Coman seems to have gone in the hamstring. No! Coman has convinced the medical staff to let him stay on.

Magnificent game, high drama and the crowd are…. doing a Mexican wave. I guess that’s what you get for not having supporters of the ACTUAL TEAMS WHO ARE PLAYING in the ground.

09:06 PM

96 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Mbabu does superbly down the right, hard low cross. Varane saves the day once again. There were two Swiss attackers lurking and Varane had to be perfect. He’s a magnificent defender that guy.

09:04 PM

96 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Haris Seferovic, absolute warrior’s performance, is coming off. Scharr (of Newcastle) is coming on.

09:03 PM

94 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

So close! Coman gets down the flank, crosses, Pavard has a chance… the ball won’t quite drop for him and he has to improvise. Flicks a shot at goal – well saved by Sommer. Tipped over for a corner, dealt with okay.

09:01 PM

32 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Benzema is coming off – looked a bit like he might have picked up a knock? Regardless, it is Giroud who comes on.

09:00 PM

92 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

The aforementioned Mehmedi gets up at a corner, but plants his effort right at the keeper.

08:59 PM

91 mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Booking for Pavard – he’s going to miss the next match – DD has got major problems at full back. But he’s got more pressing problems right now. He went in high on Mehmedi

08:57 PM

Benzema with the first of his two

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates

08:56 PM

End of 90 minutes: France 3 Switzerland 3

Exceptional entertainment. What a half of football. Five goals and a missed penalty.

08:55 PM

90+ mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

And we are still not done! Now France deliver it up field, find Coman, he brings it under control with his chest, he cuts inside… and smacks it against the upright. Oh my days. What a game! And there will be another 30 minutes at least, because that is the end of 90 minutes!

08:54 PM

90+ mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Arsenal fans, do not adjust your sets… Granit Xhaka is absolutely delivering. Another wonderful pass from deep… Mehmedi only has to control it and he’s got a one on one. But his control fails him.

08:53 PM

90+ mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Kante out of his element, making a driving run into the Swiss box… a Swiss defender, Mbabu, slides in. A natural forward might have tried to game a pen there.

08:52 PM

90+ mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Going to be four minutes added. Can either side find a winner?

08:51 PM

90+ mins: France 3 Switzerland 3

Xhaka was the man who played the pass from midfield. Kimpembe the defender who lost the man Gavranovic.

Four minutes are going to be added on…

08:49 PM

GOAL! France 3 Switzerland 3 (Gavranovic 90)

The Swiss hound the French in midfield. Benzema (?) gives Pogba a bit of a hospital pass, he’s surrounded by two players and he loses it. It’s played forward to Gavranovic, he controls it on the edge of the box, he takes a touch and he has fired it home into the corner!

08:47 PM

88 mins: France 3 Switzerland 2

Can the Swiss get hold of it and have one last spin of the wheel? France giving nothing at the moment.

08:46 PM

87 mins: France 3 Switzerland 2

Sissoko is coming on, Antoine G makes way, Deschamps just needs to shore this up. Coman is booked for a foul.

08:44 PM

84 mins: France 3 Switzerland 2

The Swiss have it in the net. Rodriguez tries an effort from distance, it is a bit of a daisy cutter, but it turns into an inadvertant through ball for Gavranovic… who slots the ball away! But that looks offside, and indeed it is offside.

08:42 PM

82 mins: France 3 Switzerland 2

Well where’s your money now?! The Swiss looked beaten after the two goals, but the third goal from Poggers only seems to have roused them. It is the men in all white who have the ball now.

08:41 PM

GOAL! France 3 Switzerland 2 (Seferovic 82)

The French were looking so classy, so slick, but they’ve allowed the Swiss to get forward down the right. A cross into the middle and a meaty, beaty, big and bouncy header from the mighty Seferovic – he’s a lovely big boy and he’s got up majestically there. Proper old school goal: cross from the right win, gie it tae tha big man and he has headed that home.

08:39 PM

80 mins: France 3 Switzerland 1

Just when France were starting to look sublime….

08:35 PM

77 mins: France 3 Switzerland 1

Another good move: Rabiot, Benzema… the movement is superb now… Coman joins in and has a shot. Smartly struck but at the keeper.

08:34 PM

GOAL! France 3 Switzerland 1 (Pogba 75)

… Benzema tries a shot, it is repelled, but only as far as Paul Pogba. He takes a couple of touches, and then unloads a glorious shot into the top corner from range. Absolute peach.

08:33 PM

74 mins: France 2 Switzerland 1

The French front three are really starting to enjoy themselves, liquid, dangerous, pacy football from them…

08:31 PM

72 mins: France 2 Switzerland 1

Mbabu and Gavranovic are coming on.

08:29 PM

70 mins: France 2 Switzerland 1

It’s all starting to happen for France. The interplay, the pace, the understanding, the connections. They look a different team.

08:28 PM

68 mins: France 2 Switzerland 1

Swiss clear the ensuing corner. They look a bit stunned and deflated. And why wouldn’t they?

08:27 PM

67 mins: France 2 Switzerland 1

We’ve already had one comedy own goal today and we nearly had enough… aimless long ball from the French, the Swiss keeper comes out, but Widmer, running back, sends the ball over his keeper with a looping header. Oh my goodness… it drifts wide, thankfully.

08:25 PM

65 mins: France 2 Switzerland 1

Xherdan Shaqiri with a perfect curled freekick… it’s beaten everyone and Widmer and Seferovic are in each others way unmarked at the back post. Ref has blown, not sure for what. Anyway they couldn’t tuck it away

08:19 PM

60 mins: France 2 Switzerland 1

Four minutes, one penalty save, two goals. France showing World Champion heart there. They’d been playing like a drain.

One minute 42 seconds between the two Benzema goals.

08:18 PM

GOAL! France 2 Switzerland 1 (Benzema 58)

More genius from Franhce, this time it is Griezmann who dances through, tries to dink it over the goalie… keeper does pretty well but he’s pushed it into the path of Benzema, who has the simplest of headers to make it 2-1.

08:17 PM

57 mins: France 1 Switzerland 1

The French are back in business.

08:16 PM

GOAL! France 1 Switzerland 1 (Benzema 56)

Oooh, Switzerland. That’s got to hurt. Mbappe plays a little slide rule through and Benzema produces a simply otherworldly touch, he kind of gathers it with his foot miles behind the rest of his body, somehow manages to drag it into the path and then slots it away. Genius.

08:14 PM

55 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

It seems to have lifted France. Pogba drives them on, releases the ball perfectly for the unmarked Mbappe and he measures out a curling shot at the far post… it’s just wide. Always looked wide.

08:13 PM

54 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Oh it’s a brilliant save from Hugo Lloris – well done sir. The penalty was reasonably well directed, low and to the keeper’s right but it was not hit with much conviction. Lloris dived and palmed it away. Huge moment, obviously.

Ricardo Rodriguez has his penalty saved

08:12 PM

It will be Ricardo Rodriguez to take it

Hugo Lloris, what have you got?

08:11 PM

52 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Zuber with a direct and quick run down the left and goes down under the challenge of Pavard. That looks well worth a Var check to me. He was haring into the box on the left, he has flown in, Zuber has done him with a bit of skill and the Frenchman has absolutely cleaned him out.

The match plays on, the French go up the other end, but soon enough that move breaks down and it is a Var check. Swiss penalty!

08:08 PM

49 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Goal saving, maybe tournament saving intervention, from Varane. Embolo had got to the byline, pulled it back and it looked like Seferovic was perfectly placed to apply the finish but Varane somehow got a touch to save the day.

08:06 PM

47 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Pogba drives forward and beats a couple. Then blooters it wide but still.

Griezmann also had a shot from range just then.

08:05 PM

46 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

I would imagine Didier has given the le hairdryeur at half time, the French have come out looking brighter.

No shot on target for them in the first half.

Rabiot has gone to left back. Lenglet the man who came off.

08:04 PM

Any changes at HT?

Yes by the looks – Coman is coming on.

Keane fin at half time: “The one thing you need in football is enthusiasm. They don’t look like they’ve got an appetite for the game. They’re not playing as a team. For all the quality they have, two lads in midfield are all over the place, the strikers are just hanging on hoping that their quality will be enough. That’s not enough at this level.

“I could play for Switzerland tonight. If you gave me time on the ball, I’d still be playing. They’re in huge trouble.”

08:00 PM

This seems to have been the key moment for ITV Hub

07:56 PM

People on Twitter are saying ITV Hub is not working well

07:52 PM

Half time: France 0 Switzerland 1

Well, well, well. Upset on the cards? France got their formation wrong, I think: they used a back three but it seemed to make them a bit flat, in terms of the geometry of their set up, and figuratively as well. The Swiss have been bright and busy.

The lad marking Mbappe, Elvedi, looked like he was in for a long evening but other colleagues have joined in to help out the right back, and Mbappe has been kept largely quiet. Antoine Griezmann has done naff all. Karim Benzema also very limited involvement.

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates – AFP via Getty Images

07:50 PM

45+ mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Granit Xhaka sends Embolo, who blooters his cross well out. Maybe they need to get him looked at… anyway, that is half time.

07:49 PM

45+ mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Benzema drives into the box and shoots. Rebounds out, Embolo goes up for the header with Rabiot who has absolutely drilled him with the head. Ooof. God that could have been nasty. Well he’s up and seemingly okay to carry on but the Docs will be checking him over at HT, which is imminent.

07:48 PM

45 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Embolo surges into the box, he’s looked lively. France have plenty back and get it clear but he’s a threat that guy, no question.

07:46 PM

44 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Mbappe, maybe getting impatient, tries a low percentage shot from outside the box.

07:44 PM

42 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Deschamps looks a little uneasy as he paces that technical area.

07:43 PM

41 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Swiss corner. Lloris was rooted to his line, but it is cleared by one of his defenders.

07:42 PM

40 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Nice move this from the Swiss, Xhaka slots it through but Embolo’s touch lets him down. He could have been in there.

07:41 PM

39 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Looks like the French are in fact switching to a back four.

07:41 PM

38 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

There’s a drinks break and someone has got on the pitch – a streaker I guess judging from the amused jeers.

07:40 PM

37 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Rabiot has got forward well but his fellow wing back Benjamin Pavard, on the right, hasn’t really got up at all. So those three at the back are four and half at the back and it’s all a bit flat and defensive for the French.

07:39 PM

36 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Antoine G has a corner for the French. That’s easily dealt with.

07:37 PM

32 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Nico Elvedi has a hell of a job on, marking Mbappe. That just got harder: he has been booked for tripping Adrien Rabiot.

07:35 PM

30 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Varane has chopped down Steven Zuber.

Freekick comes in and Embolo has a header! Should have done better, and he knows it..

07:30 PM

28 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Rabiot is coming into the game, cutting inside and he’s let rip with a spiffy shot, not at all far wide.

07:29 PM

27 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Pogba with a nice ball fired in, Benzema controls it gorgeously with the outside of his boot as he spins, but really well marshalled by the Swiss defence there. Doing a decent job so far.

07:28 PM

25 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Mbappe strikes it cleanly, wall does its job and rebounds to the same player. Mbappe crushes the rebound wide. He can certainly give the ball a wallop.

07:27 PM

24 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

France have a freekick…

07:23 PM

22 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

France starting to tick… Rabiot drives to the goal-line, crosses, and the keeper does well just to flap that away with a striker lurking.

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates – Pool via Reuters

07:23 PM

20 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Xhaka looks to drive the Swiss forward but he has given it away… Pogba with great vision to pick out Mbappe, but he’s caught offside. He’s been caught off a few times the last couple of times I have watched him. Coach should tell him that he’s so quick he can just take a breath, non?

07:22 PM

19 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

A pass intended for Mbappe goes astray and he’s got a bit of a cob on.

07:20 PM

18 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

Approving reaction from Chris Sutton on the BBC about that goal! “This is a terrific header from the big cart-horse, he gets up superbly. He bullies Lenglet, nudging him to take him out of the game and then he powers the header into the far corner.

Rabiot gives it away..

07:19 PM

17 mins: France 0 Switzerland 1

That should make for a cracking game, shouldn’t it? The French will really have to have a go. They’ve got a freekick to get started with, Antoine Griezmann slings it in but the Swiss deal with that okay.

07:15 PM

GOAL! France 0 Switzerland 1 (Seferovic 15)

The Swiss have it in the goal! Nice build up play. Seferovic and Embolo are involved in a patient, clever build up. It’s out to Zuber on the left, decent delivery. The ball is hung up, Sferovic gives the centre back Lenglet a judicious wee shove and then puts the header away. Var check, but it is not going to save the French. Well played Switzerland!

07:15 PM

14 mins: France 0 Switzerland 0

Switzerland enjoying a nice little spell of the ball here.

07:11 PM

9 mins: France 0 Switzerland 0

A better few minutes for the Swiss, couple of attacks of their own, not letting France have it all their own way.

Presnel Kimpembe was limping a bit for Les Bleus a moment ago… we’ll keep an eye on him.

07:07 PM

6 mins: France 0 Switzerland 0

Mbappe at it again, at Elvedi again. Xhaka comes back to help out and makes an important intervention.

07:06 PM

5 mins: France 0 Switzerland 0

Another dangerous France attack, Benzema with a shot: Steven Zuber with a block.

07:06 PM

4 mins: France 0 Switzerland 0

All France in the early stages. Ally McCoisy says: “Early signs are it might be a long night for Elvedi on the right side of that Swiss defence. Both Kylian Mbappe and Karim Benzema have had a go at him already.”

France: Hugo Lloris (captain); Presnel Kimpembe, Raphael Varane, Clement Lenglet, Adrien Rabiot, Benjamin Pavard; Paul Pogba, N’Golo Kante; Antoine Griezmann, Kylian Mbappe, Karim Benzema

Switzerland: Yann Sommer; Nico Elvedi, Manuel Akanji, Ricardo Rodriguez, Steven Zuber, Silvan Widmer; Remo Freuler, Granit Xhaka (captain), Xherdan Shaqiri; Breel Embolo, Haris Seferovic

07:03 PM

2 mins: France 0 Switzerland 0

Raphael Varane gets up well there! Towers above all for a free header and really could have done better there.

07:01 PM

1 mins: France 0 Switzerland 0

France in dark blue shirts and shorts, red socks. Swiss in all white. Mbappe the first player to show, runs down the left. France have won a corner.

07:00 PM

Deschamps had to solve

a problem with an injury at left back to Digne and Hernandez, so has decided to do away with one altogether and play three centre backs. We’ll see how it all works – right now!

06:55 PM

Anthem time!

The Swissers to play first.

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates – Pool Photo via AP

06:54 PM

The players are in the tunnel

Here come the French boys. There are about 25,000 fans in. 24 degrees the temperature. Clive Tyldesley says that there are approx “1,500 fans” from each of the two competing countries.

06:53 PM

This man is among the problems the Swiss have to solve

Paul Pogba – DeFodi Images via Getty Images

06:46 PM

ITV’s pundits

are unanimous in their assessment that only complacency can defeat France tonight. That and possibly Xherdan Shaqiri. But the expert view appears to be that N’Golo Kante will just sit on him, and that should nullify the attacking threat of the Swiss.

06:40 PM

The winner of this match

will play Spain in the next round. Luis Enrique’s men have won the game of the tournament so far, beating the Croatians 5-3 aet. It was 3-1 late in normal time but Croatia forced extra time, had a great chance early in it, and then let in two.

06:36 PM

Fans are up for it!

france vs switzerland euro 2020 live score team news latest updates – AFP via Getty Images

06:13 PM

France tactics

World champions France appear to have changed their approach and the team news suggests they will play with three centre backs when they take on Switzerland in their European Championship last-16 clash.

Coach Didier Deschamps has made three changes to the team that drew 2-2 with Portugal in their last Group F match on Wednesday while the Swiss, who last played eight days ago when they beat Turkey to finish third in Group A, remain unchanged.

The French have added Clement Lenglet into the centre of defence alongside Presnel Kimpembe and Raphael Varane and prefer Adrien Rabiot on the left to Lucas Hernandez, and Benjamin Pavard on the right to Jules Kounde.

Corentin Tolisso is the other player who drops to the bench for France, whose midfielder Ngolo Kante celebrates his 50th cap.

Switzerland, who have gone out in the last 16 at the last three major tournaments, have stuck with the lineup from last Sunday’s 3-1 win in Baku.

It means flying full back Kevin Mbabu, who was an option for coach Vladimir Petkovic, remains on the bench despite much speculation he could start.

For Petkovic, the match is his 77th in charge of the Swiss side, equalling the record of Karl Rappan, who had four spells in charge of the national team between 1937 and 1963.

Teams again

France: Hugo Lloris (captain); Presnel Kimpembe, Raphael Varane, Clement Lenglet, Adrien Rabiot, Benjamin Pavard; Paul Pogba, N’Golo Kante; Antoine Griezmann, Kylian Mbappe, Karim Benzema

Switzerland: Yann Sommer; Nico Elvedi, Manuel Akanji, Ricardo Rodriguez, Steven Zuber, Silvan Widmer; Remo Freuler, Granit Xhaka (captain), Xherdan Shaqiri; Breel Embolo, Haris Seferovic

05:59 PM

Team news

Referee: Fernando Rapallini (Argentina)

05:55 PM

Extra time in the other game

We should have our teams for this one very shortly.

05:52 PM

What you reading this for?!

Get yourself over to Croatia 3 Spain 3!!!

05:50 PM

Kylian Mbappe arrives

France’s forward Kylian Mbappe exits the team bus as he arrives at the National Arena in Bucharest – AFP/Getty

05:47 PM

While we wait for this one to start

You’d be well advised to follow Rob Bagchi’s live blog of the Croatia 2 Spain 3 match… there are five or so minutes left and Modric’s boys are giving it their all.

05:24 PM

France vs Switzerland match preview

Good evening and welcome to our live blog of France vs Switzerland, in the last 16 stage of the Euros. We will have all the build up ahead of the 8pm kick off and the team news. In the meantime, here’s my colleague Luke Edwards to set the scene…

Before a ball had been kicked at this European Championships we knew who the favourites to win it were and nothing that has happened since has done anything to dent confidence in France.

They finished top of by far the toughest group, beating Germany before securing the draws against Portugal and Hungary which enabled Didier Deschamps’ side to qualify for the round of 16 top, setting up tonight’s first knockout test against Switzerland.

Other sides, Italy, Belgium and the Netherlands, may have qualified with maximum points, but France did so leaving plenty in reserve.

Whenever they were put under pressure, most notably by Portugal in their final group game, where they fell behind twice, the French got back into it with the sort of effortless upping of performance levels, led by the Manchester United midfielder Paul Pogba and Juventus’ Adrien Rabiot, that looked ominous for everyone else.

When you also factor in that arguably their best player, Paris Saint Germain’s Kylian Mbappe has not scored a goal yet, it is impossible to escape the idea so much more can come from Les Blues starting against the Swiss.

The reigning world champions have not been at their best – more functionable than flair – but in the Germany game, in particular, they delivered a performance that was simply too good for one of the other major nations to handle.

It all points towards the completion of an enthralling test, a challenge to replicate the achievements of the last great French side which won the World Cup in 1998 and the European Championships two years later. Expectations are so high that anything less than a victory in the final at Wembley on July 11th will be perceived as a failure.

It is an expectation this generation are used to playing with. Just as they are comfortable with the comparison with those that conquered Europe and the rest of the world before them. They are not burdened by the weight of history, they seem to be inspired by it.

There was a time when we could allude to fragility in France. They have had talented teams before and failed, but when you have already won the World Cup, why would any of the players feel the strain of trying to win the Euros too?

There was pressure in the group stage and they came through with the air of an athlete qualifying from the heats – doing enough to get over the line ahead of their rivals but doing so with plenty left in reserve.

The concern for the rest of those with genuine title winning credentials – including England of course – is that you feel France could easily move through the gears as we enter the business end of the tournament.

Should he add a European Championship winning medal to the World Cup one he helped inspire France to three years ago, Pogba’s status as one of the world’s best will be assured in silverware.

Yet, at club level, he remains a difficult problem to work out. For Manchester United, there have always been flashes of brilliance, but also far too many mediocre displays and the criticism that comes with it.

“For me, it’s only the French Pogba that matters,”said Deschamps when asked about the difference between the player in blue compared to red.

“I don’t like talking about what’s going on at club football whether it’s [Ole Gunnar] Solskjær or any other coach. Players are different, coaches are different.

“The only thing that’s important to me is what he’s doing for the French team and the importance he has on the pitch. He is a born leader and a highly influential player.”

Pogba has never received the same sort of global acclaim someone like Zinedine Zidance received when he was the star of those tournament triumphs in 98 and 2000.

But Pogba will match him if France are crowned champions. He will no longer have to prove anything to anyone – not in France at least. The scene is set.

Source link

0 notes

emptyspacefalling · 4 years

Text

TW ACCIDENTAL OD

Welp so today i accidentally od'd on prozac

I took my doses too close to each other i think

And let me tell you it was such a horrible experience and i would 0/10 recommend even on accident

I actually thought i was having a panic attack and then i ended up tensing so bad that i couldn't move my hands and feet and my dad had to help me out the car

And then i had to pump my hands and stuff to regain movement

I was nauseated and my heart rate spiked up to like 130

Constant anxiety

My mom equates it do doing speed

Its been hours i think and i still have some chest burning and anxiety, slight trembling and nausea

Im ready to have these bad feelings go away. And im not taking that prozac again

0 notes

hellyeahrpmemes · 7 years

Text

※ JENNA MARBLES SENTENCE STARTERS, PT. VIII ※

here’s sentences from 10 more of jenna’s videos! feel free to change names/pronouns/zodiac signs/etc.! more jenna sentences

OPEN LETTERS

“So I had a bunch of thoughts floating around in my head and I didn’t know what to do with them, so I decided to make them all open letters.”

“Dear open letters: lighten up, man. Take it easy.”

“This is really difficult because I have my contacts in and my glasses on.”

“Why is your dog screaming? Like, literally screaming.”

“I’ve met more new people in the last week of my life than I have in the past year. I don’t know if that’s the saddest thing ever or the most awesome thing ever.”

“Good try, but it needs a little work.”

“What’s your favorite vegetable? Eggplant, said no one.”

“We know you know. You know we know.”

“Stop keeping all the cool stuff for yourselves. It’s selfish.”

“0/10 design, I am very angry.”

“Who thought of this? This is a terrible idea.”

“Dear avocados: you can still fuck yourselves, you’re getting worse.”

“Are you sure you’re supposed to be here? Because something doesn’t seem right.”

“I feel better now.”

“Dear bees: if you’re so endangered, why are there always at least 100 of you in my backyard at any given moment just waiting to give your life and hurt me?”

“You’re a do-nothing. Do you wanna be a do-nothing? Cause right now, you’re a do-nothing.”

“I sprayed hairspray directly into my ear the other day, and it was a horrible experience. I don’t wanna relive it ever again.”

“I like, really, really wanna be your friend.”

“Not everything in life requires crying.”

“We get it, you’re on an emotional roller coaster called life, but aren’t we all?”

“Can you please shut the fuck up?”

FULL FACE USING ONLY HIGHLIGHTERS CHALLENGE

“Yes, finally, a makeup challenge that I can do.”

“I’m ready, I wanna do it, I’m so excited.”

“It feels like I dipped my face in a bowl of nacho cheese.”

“I look like the tin man, but we’re gonna fix it.”

“It’s starting to smell a little like paint thinner, but I think it’s worth it.”

“I want you to be able to see my face in the dark.”

“This is the look I’m going for.”

“I’m gonna use this mascara in the color ‘my parents are disappointed in me’.”

“I wanna be seen from space.”

“I mean, now I’m ready.”

“Get on my level, all other makeup artists.”

“This video has been the highlight of my life.”

BAD HABITS

“I need some tape to tape my eyes open.”

“I’m not secretly addicted to crack cocaine.”

“It’s more of a nervous thing.”

“I’m kinda lazy, so that’s kind hard to do.”

“I can’t help it, cause it makes me feel better.”

“Hey, you wanna stay up for another 3 hours?”

“Better go ahead and watch the entire season right now.”

“Is it rude? Yes. Is it terrible? Yes.”

“I feel like it makes every argument a little less serious.”

“Everything’s gonna be okay, it’s really not a big deal.”

“I’m helping us in the long-term.”

“Who the fuck invented contacts? Incredible invention.”

“I’m doing what they would want me to. I’m living my best life.”

“I don’t really like to throw things out, because things are so good, why would I throw this out?”

“That is not an appropriate thing to do with your belongings.”

“A little bit of chaos is good for your kitchen or your house, not a lot though.”

“I’m borderline too much.”

“I somehow refuse to charge anything ever.”

“I’m the most annoying person.”

“I have a really bad habit about being very nitpicky about not even the things that matter in life.”

“That fuckin’ pillow needs to go there.”

“Don’t fucking touch that, or I will kill you.”

“I’m very sorry. I’m working on it.”

“He knows that he owns my soul.”

“This is the reality that I’ve created for myself.”

“I get locked out all the time.”

“That’s not a habit, it’s just a thing.”

“What am I supposed to do about that?”

“Have you seen this dog yet? I found it.”

“That is the spice of life, am I right?”

“I feel vulnerable. I always do. You know that.”

REVIEWING BAD APPS 2

“It’s just fuckin’ funny, man, okay?”

“Whose life is this?”

“Here we motherfuckin’ go.”

“This app can’t be good for anyone.”

“This is not legal. There’s no way they can do this.”

“This is disgusting, you know that?”

“I give that a get out of my ear/10.”

“I’ve never been happier to play rock paper scissors with a stranger.”

“Blink if you’re being held captive.”

“We were playing rock paper scissors and now we’re buying a bikini.”

“This got so fucking creepy!”

“This is a work environment…!”

“What the fuck is this job you got, girl, you’re better than that!”

“This is what happens if you do drugs once.”

“10/10 idea for a tattoo.”

“This is criminal.”

“I think that’s sexy Christmas, and worth a dollar.”

“That is a demon.”

“That was weird and sad.”

“That was so aggravating!”

“Can he see us?”

“That is the most legendary app of all time.”

“Don’t touch my hat, what is wrong with you?”

MY BOYFRIEND TEACHES ME JIU JITSU

“I can’t believe we’re doing this.”

“This doesn’t sound like the sport for me.”

“This doesn’t sound like a sport at all.”

“You can strangle someone to death.”

“Am I allowed to lick? Spit? Blow on you? Scream loudly? Sing a song?”

“It’s basically the same rules as Kindergarten; don’t be a complete asshole and spit on people.”

“Sounds like a disrespectful sport, that’s what it sounds like.”

“Is there gonna be snacks?”

“Please don’t break my arm.”

“No, you can’t sing that.”

“One, two, three, goodbye.”

“It felt wrong.”

“That’s really not allowed.”

“Don’t do that with your tongue.”

“Can’t you just kill them with your kindness?”

“Oh my fuck, you’re heavy.”

“My leg hurts, is that normal?”

“I don’t want to choke you, I love you.”

“It doesn’t look very threatening when I do it.”

“Don’t you want to choke me right now?

“I love you, but don’t do that.”

“Ow, for fuck’s sake!”

“Whose hand is that?”

“What do you call this? Is it called ‘sleepover’?”

“Why would anyone want to do this?”

“Don’t do it, I tried it, it’s a bad idea.”

“Who the fuck is that?”

“I feel like I didn’t even get a workout, I just got wet.”

ROAST YOURSELF CHALLENGE

“You know, I don’t eat beef, but, if I did, I would like it roasted.”

“You were cool in 2012, the end.”

“You’re actual trash.”

“You got a Masters Degree and don’t use it.”

“Not cool, man. Clarinets are easy to misplace.”

“The fuck was that, a Lion King reference?”

“Can’t even trust you to not make it weird for even one second.”

“I’m not making it weird, you’re making weird.”

“Ya nasty. Get a manicure.”

“You should grow up and get a job.”

“You have a radio show because your face is better for radio.”

“Where is your top lip?”

“I watched you bite your own toenail the other day.”

“Your hair is stupid!”

ASMR MUKBANG UNBOXING GAMING TUTORIAL

“Can someone fucking help you?”

“I hear that they have billions of dollars and lots of Mexican food.”

“I would prefer neater handwriting, but this slop-fest will have to do for now.”

“They only fill the chips up to about here.”

“These have been sitting out for a little while, so they’re kind of stale.”

“It tastes a little like the long line I waited in to get this.”

“Did you do anything fun today at school?”

“I got it at Target.”

“It smells good, but it’s a lot, you know?”

“There’s a tag that says something about getting arrested if you take it off.”

“Am I going to jail now?”

“I’ve been to that bitch’s house, and I can’t get Kylie lip kit.”

“I hope this was everything you wanted ever.”

REACTING TO MY OLD VIDEOS (300TH VIDEO)

“It’s hard to watch yourself, and it’s cringey, especially if it’s old.”

“Oh, man, this is brutal.”

“A very nice young girl with a very large chip on her shoulder.”

“I’m still incredibly embarrassed and ashamed.”

“Look at this tan, though… look at this tan.”

“There was a fire at my job, and, like a good employee, I put the fire out with a fire extinguisher.”

“I was working at a tanning salon, and I was like, this is a good look.”

“I am past this phase, thankfully.”

“It looks like it feels like Doritos because it did feel like Doritos.”

“I’ve come a long way.”

“Those things are demonic-looking.”

“The voice is very jarring.”

“It’s a lot. If you could just dial it back, like, a bunch of notches, that’d be really great.”

“I mean, I can’t say that I blame you.”

“I can’t even fully understand what I’m saying.”

“He filmed the whole thing on my laptop.”

“I’ve been the same since day one, so…”

“The worst quality, the worst audio, just terrible. Terrible all around.”

“She seems like a nice girl.”

“Jenna, I feel like you’re throwing your life away.”

“I think my entire life will be a cycle of me looking back at everything I’ve ever done and being like, ‘this is horrible. I hate it’.”

“I hate you for this.”

“This is the worst thing I’ve ever seen.”

“It genuinely pissed people off.”

“People were so mad at me.”

“It felt like people hated me personally.”

“Everyone’s just thinking that I’m some alcoholic.”

“I certainly feel that I’ve changed a lot as a person.”

“I’ve said lots of things that I probably shouldn’t have said.”

“It means everything to me. I just really appreciate it more than I could ever possibly tell you.”

“I changed my life.”

“Thank you so, so, so, so much for being kind to me, and caring, and giving me a chance to learn from my mistakes.”

“This is the most fun, most cool, most amazing thing that I could ever ask for.”

THOUGHTS FROM A BATHTUB 2

“Petition to make formal bath time a thing.”

“You can’t fit a square peg in a round hole, but you can light everything on fire.”

“They already make hot sauce, but why don’t they make cold sauce for food that’s too spicy?”

“I think it should be socially acceptable to sprint anywhere you want to. It’s faster, and I’m in a hurry.”

“One time, I wished upon a cloud.”

“The word tabletop is redundant.”

“Don’t hate the player, hate the coach.”

I think alarm systems would be more effective if, instead of alarm noises, they just shouted out the entire Gettysburg Address.”

“One time, your parents had sex with each other.”

“I think a really dirty, lazy person invented Febreeze.”

“I will now perform the opening song “Bonjour” from “Beauty and the Beast”.”

“I feel vulnerable right now. I feel very vulnerable and out there.”

JENNA’S RATCHET FASHION BOUTIQUE: DOG COSTUMES

“I was genuinely baffled by it.”

“I am a mere mortal, not a crafting god.”

“I feel like this is the fairest way to do this, to please everyone.”

“This could get very dicey, but let’s do it, I’m ready.”

“Now you’re filled in, congratulations, you’re welcome.”

“This is really, really bad.”

“I don’t really know what my plan is.”

“I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before.”

“I hope I don’t regret this.”

“Why wait for Halloween to make your dreams come true?”

“Much to your, and my, surprise, this actually works.”

“Is it overkill? Yeah.”

“See something cool? Make a mediocre version of it.”

“Please work, please work.”

“I don’t have any other ideas, there is no Plan B, this has to work.”

#rp memes #rp sentence starters #roleplay meme #roleplay sentence starters #mine

41 notes · View notes

gadgetsrevv · 5 years

Text

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Line ups confirmed, Daniel James decision, Premier League latest | Football | Sport

WEST HAM vs MANCHESTER UNITED – PREMIER LEAGUE LIVE!

West Ham have won two of their last four home league games against Manchester United

Manchester United have scored more Premier League goals against West Ham than any other side (94)

Sebastien Haller has scored three of the Hammers’ six Premier League goals this term

United have not kept an away league clean sheet since a 3-0 win at relegated Fulham in early February

West Ham XI: Fabianski, Cresswell, Diop, Ogbonna, Fredericks, Rice, Fornals, Noble, Yarmolenko, Anderson, Haller

Manchester United XI: De Gea, Wan-Bissaka, Lindelof, Maguire, Young, Matic, Pereira, McTominay, Mata, Rashford

Twitter round-up

13:35: Peter: Marcos Rojo should have started instead of Ashley Young. Fred should have played in place of Andreas Pereira. We have no attacking options. We all saw what Marcus Rashford did during the week. Wasted like a hundred chances!

Now, Peter might be exaggerating a bit but he’s got a point.

A colleague of mine, Ben Pringle, did some statistical analysis and found that Rashford’s underlying statistics are less-than-favourable compared to his Premier League rivals.

His shot accuracy is currently sat at just 42.86 per cent according to Wyscout data, which is way down on the likes of Temmu Pukki who has hit the target with 75 per cent of his efforts.

According to Wyscout’s unique algorithm, Rashford currently holds an index value of 3.36 ‘Expected goals’ from his 14 shots so far in 2019/20.

This means he is one of just three top forwards who have scored less goals than expected in the current campaign, partially due to some wayward free-kicks and a host of blocked efforts from inside the box.

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Premier League score, goals, highlights and updates (Image: GETTY)

Search term

13:30: I was having a look at some of the key search terms surrounding Manchester United today. Y’know, to see what everyone is looking for.

And at the top was… ‘Man Utd 9 – 0 Ipswich’

Now what could have prompted such a search? Could it have been Ipswich’s dogged 1-0 victory over Gillingham yesterday? Or, more likely, Manchester City’s absolute tonking of Watford.

The champions were at their ruthless best at the Etihad Stadium on Saturday as they hammered the hapless Hornets by the joint second-biggest scoreline in Premier League history – one short of equalling Manchester United’s record.

youtube

Show some ambition!

13:25: That’s the rallying cry from West Ham manager Manuel Pellegrini, who wants his side to show their ambition to compete with the top six.

In last season’s meeting at the London Stadium, West Ham ran out 3-1 winners but Pellegrini expects a tough fixture this time.

“We know that we have a very strong team in front of us, now we have a good test against United and we will try to beat them,” Pellegrini said.

“It’s the only way to try to arrive in the first six positions of the table, demonstrating every game that you are able to do it.”

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Premier League score, goals, highlights and updates (Image: GETTY)

Twitter round-up

Usually I would bring you reaction to the line ups – but people seem more interested in Sky Sports having Jose Mourinho, Roy Keane and Graeme Souness on the panel this afternoon.

Max: Mourinho, Souness and Keane in the same room. Whoever came up with that idea needs a promotion!

Michael: Roy Keane, Graeme Souness and Jose Mourinho are Sky’s pundits today. Genuine shame they’re not showing an Arsenal match.

Dan: Souness, Mourinho & Keane in the studio. No pressure Man Utd.

Team news – Manchester United

13:15: Ole Gunnar Solskjaer makes nine changes from that dreadful Europa League match against Astana. I can’t put into words how bad that was for the neutral.

Anyway, Nemanja Matic and Marcus Rashford are the only survivors. No sign of Mason Greenwood, who is presumably injured.

Daniel James starts after recovering from a back problem.

Team news – West Ham

13:10: Manuel Pellegrini makes two changes to the West Ham side that drew 0-0 at Aston Villa.

Aaron Cresswell replaces the suspended Arthur Masuaku, while summer arrival Pablo Fornals comes in for the injured Manuel Lanzini.

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Premier League score, goals, highlights and updates (Image: GETTY)

Bigger news

13:05: Well this has to be the signing of the summer – Roy Keane has joined Sky Sports’ punditry team for this season.

Keane has made clear his desire to return to management, but the Corkman couldn’t resist joining Graeme Souness to create the angriest punditry team ever assembled.

“I’ve worked with Sky Sports quite a few times over the years and it’s always been an experience I’ve enjoyed, so this makes absolute sense,” Keane said.

“It’s a game of opinions, I’ve never shied away from giving mine and that’s only going to continue this season. Sky Sports has always been famous for the heated debates – I look forward to starting a few more.”

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Premier League score, goals, highlights and updates (Image: GETTY)

The sides

13:00: The starting XI’s arrive. Pablo Fornals starts for West Ham, while there’s no sign of Mason Greenwood in the Manchester United squad.

West Ham XI: Fabianski, Cresswell, Diop, Ogbonna, Fredericks, Rice, Fornals, Noble, Yarmolenko, Anderson, Haller.

Subs: Jiminez, Balbuena, Zabaleta, Snodgrass, Sanchez, Wilshere, Ajeti.

Manchester United XI: De Gea, Wan-Bissaka, Lindelof, Maguire, Young, Matic, Pereira, McTominay, Mata, Rashford.

Subs: Romero, Lingard, Rojo, Fred, Gomes, Tuanzebe, Chong.

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Premier League score, goals, highlights and updates (Image: GETTY)

What’s on?

12:55: Plenty. Four Premier League fixtures this afternoon and four of the eight sides in action will be using Euston train station. Can’t see that going horribly wrong.

Sunday fixtures: West Ham vs Manchester United, Crystal Palace vs Wolves, Chelsea vs Liverpool and Arsenal vs Aston Villa.

I think we call that a veritable buffet of football. *Ticks off Word of the Day calendar*

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Premier League score, goals, highlights and updates (Image: GETTY)

Afternoon

12:50: You here for the West Ham vs Manchester United match? Good, you’re in the right place. Congratulations.

How’s everyone feeling today? Few sore heads around I’m sure.

I had my first (and last) ever trip to the dog track last night. 12 races and not a single winner. That has to be a record of some kind?

Anyway, back to more important matters.

Fresh from their Europa League exploits – Ole Gunnar Solskjaer’s side travel down to London for a clash against West Ham who, for my money, are flying under the radar in the battle for a top-six finish.

Manuel Pellegrini’s side haven’t tasted defeat since the opening day against Manchester City.

All the ingredients for a cracking Sunday fixture. Standby for team news.

West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Premier League score, goals, highlights and updates (Image: GETTY)

WEST HAM vs MANCHESTER UNITED – EARLY TEAM NEWS

West Ham’s long-term absentee Winston Reid could return for the under-23s next week or the week after.

The 31-year-old has been sidelined since his knee injury against Swansea almost a year and a half ago, but could be nearing a return.

Manuel Lanzini has a small problem, which will be assessed on Saturday. Arthur Masuaku will be unavailable after his sending-off at Aston Villa on Monday and is expected to be replaced by Aaron Cresswell.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer hopes to have Daniel James back against the Hammers, but the Manchester United manager again expects to be without Paul Pogba, Anthony Martial and Luke Shaw.

James missed Thursday’s Europa League win against Astana due to a knock sustained against Leicester and will be assessed ahead of the trip to the capital.

Solskjaer is not expecting Pogba (ankle) or Martial (thigh) to return on Sunday, while left-back Shaw (hamstring) remains sidelined.

Source link . More news

via wordpress https://ift.tt/31I4IqU

#Football News West Ham vs Man Utd LIVE: Line ups confirmed #Daniel James decision #Premier League la

0 notes

snowbirdrv · 5 years

Text

Notes from the road!

From

Timber Trails Campground 1276 Matts Lane, Mulberry Grove, IL

2 1/2 hrs/170 miles to

Stopover #6 on our RV trip – a “loop” from Clearwater to Terre Haute, Indiana

– Cape Camping & RV Park 1900 N. Kings Highway, Cape Girardeau, MO 63701 (1.5 miles from I-55, Exit 99) 573-332-8888 Toll Free: 1-800-335-1178 $34/night with Good Sam 10% discount. https://www.goodsam.com/campgrounds-rv-parks/details/default.aspx?cgid=250000347 Blogbook Entry Restaurants: https://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurants-g44207-Cape_Girardeau_Missouri.html Lambert’s Cafe I, 2305 E. Malone, Sikeston, MO https://throwedrolls.com/lamberts-cafe-i/

Very friendly and accomodating Hostess who parked us beside the restroom/shower facility – very clean and comfortable – when we asked. We have stayed here in the past and liked it. The FHU sites are drive-throughs with good TV and WiFi reception. There are many restaurants a short drive away (Mexican within walking distance) and a short drive to downtown and the Mississippi riverfront for shopping and sightseeing. If you are up for a short road excursion you’ll find a Lambert’s Cafe – “The Home of Throwed Rolls” and some pretty good down-home cooking. Lambert’s is not only a restaurant it’s an experience. We had planned a trip to Lambert’s but it was too blooming hot (feels like 105!) we opted for KFC instead and stayed indoors at our site. August is not the optimum time of year for Rving in the South as is February camping in the North. Heat wave passing through here currently.

This is a review and notes from a previous visit we made to Cape Girardeau on the

Mississippi River. www.snowbirdrvtrails.com/capegirardeau.html and our previous Blogbook Entry More about Lambert’s (unique) Cafe: Lambert’s Cafe I, 2305 E. Malone, Sikeston, MO https://throwedrolls.com/lamberts-cafe-i/ ———————————————————————————————————-

3 hrs/208 miles to

Stopover #7 on our RV trip – a “loop” from Clearwater, FL to Terre Haute, Indiana – Notes from the road! Memphis South RV Park And Campground 256 Campground Drive, Coldwater, MS 38618 Passport America $25/Cash https://www.passportamerica.com/campgrounds/data/2856/Memphis-South-RV-Park-And-Campground/0#top Restaurants: https://www.yelp.com/search?cflt=restaurants&find_loc=Coldwater%2C+MS+38618

We have stayed in several campgrounds in Mississippi in the past and when we found Memphis South in 2012 I thought we had a winner for this stretch of road. That was then and this is now. The long road in and around the Park is pitted with potholes so badly you cannot find a path where one or more wheels and we were thankful we weren’t towing Big Bertha this time. The long entrance road is horrible. The Passport price is cheap at $25/cash per night but no longer worth it. One of very few Passport America campgrounds we would not stay at again. The WiFi was non-existent even though we had a line of sight to the repeater less than 50 yards away. The over-the-air TV channels consisted of PBS and children’s programs unless your antenna was directed just so. Ours is fixed so it meant we would have to park backwards on the site. We did that the second night were able to receive the Network channels.

The staff was cheerful and friendly before and now it’s lacsidaisical at best (being kind) – and showing little interest in our TV or WiFi problems. This could be and once was a great little stopover on I-55 but enter at your own axle’s risk. There is a Subway and Shell gas near the entrance and we can’t honestly recommend either of those either.

Observation: Trying to write on the road has its obstacles like when I glance over and Stanley has a paw in my fresh brewed coffee. Yes, he likes coffee too when he can get away with it.

Normally we head South from here on I-55 toward New Orleans and Bay St. Louis (two of our very favorite places to visit) and then East towards Florida. I-55 through Mississippi is one of the nicer Interstates we travel but this time we will be angling in a Southeasterly direction to pick up I-75 again just above what was our first stopover on this trip near Valdosta Georgia.

———————————————————————————————————-

2 1/2hrs/164 miles to

Stopover #8 on our RV trip – a “loop” from Clearwater, FL to Terre Haute, Indiana – Notes from the road! Togetherness Works RV Park 3161 State Hwy 253,Guin, Alabama Reservation: 205-487-6092 $25/Cash

Every now and then we find a gem – a treasure hidden in plain sight waiting for anyone to find it. On this trip it’s clearly “Togetherness Works RV Park”. Rv Park building is not Junior’s real job. He calls it more of a hobby that started 20 years ago on a piece of Alabama mountainside his Mom called home. Just forest on 20 acres when he began to turn it into a beautiful, rural retreat it is today.

Junior turned lumberjack for part of the “hobby” carefully turning the acerage into some beautiful camping spots. He did some road building to assure good gravel roadways and drainage. He ran city water and sewer lines to each site as well as power. He turned sawyer and built a small sawmill to build a deck and bench for each site. He built a very nice cabin for their kids when they came to visit. His wife, the Alabama Gardener in the family, planted flowers and gardens throughout.

He had lumber left over after he built the cabin and his wife mentioned it would really be nice to have a shower house – so he built one. The shower house (all knotty pine and tongue and groove inside) turned out large and spacious so his wife said it would be even better if they could have a laundy room. Sure enough you’ll find washer and dryer in the building.

Junior doesn’t advertise so it’s mostly word-of-mouth and not the easiest place to find on the ‘Net but it’s off Alabama Exit 26 from I-22. Then turn right to the stop sign, then left to a “Y” in the road. Left at the Y for 3 miles to the campground.. Phone 205-412-7554 from the stop sign and the owner will meet you at the end of his road.

This one took some research! Though there are campgrounds along I-22 in Alabama there are very few with good reviews near our stopping point. So it was this one with good reviews or a Walmart Super Center parking lot nearby. We made the right choice and if ever you find yourself RVing on I-22 near Guin Alabama you’d do well to give Junior and his wife a phone call and stop on in. This place also has to be gorgeous when the Fall foliage breaks out!

Now it’s on to Troy, Alabama.

———————————————————————————————————-

Notes from the road:

3 1/2 hrs/225 miles to

Stopover #9 on our RV trip – a “loop” from Clearwater, FL to Terre Haute, Indiana and back again.

Walnut Creek RV Park

222 County Road 5516

Troy, Alabama 36081 334-482-3532

Passport America $17

https://www.passportamerica.com/campgrounds/data/3767/Walnut-Creek-RV-Park/0#top

Restaurants: https://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurants-g30887-Troy_Alabama.html

Things to Do: https://www.thecrazytourist.com/15-best-things-to-do-in-troy-al/

150 RV sites, can accommodate any size RV, 20/30/50 amp, dump station, water, sewer, full hookups, pull thrus, tent sites, restrooms, showers, Cable TV, biking, ATV, picnic area, nature watching, fishing, 10,000 square foot indoor pavilion w/stage, sound system, handicap facilities, full kitchen, ice machine, and tables and chairs. Lighted and secure area, 20 acre stocked spring fed lake with daily fishing permits available. 29 sites overlooking Lake Promise. Covered picnic area adjacent to pavilion. Peaceful and country atmosphere minutes from Troy.

We do recommend

Sisters Restaurant 13153 US-231, Troy, AL

It’s a Southern style buffet filled with “homemades” and totally delicious. The $12.50 pp price can’t be beat either!

——————————————————————————-

3 ½ hrs/200 miles to

Stopover #10 on our RV trip – a “loop” from Clearwater, FL to Terre Haute, Indiana –

Loop complete and back to our first stopover 3 weeks ago.

Eagles Roost RV Resort

5465 Mill Store Road, Lake Park, GA 31636

229-559-5192

$32/Night. Good Sam -10%.

4 hrs./225 miles

Stop # 11 Back at Home Base – Clearwater, Florida.- with Jasmine the new addition to our family.

You will be able to trace our entire loop by visiting our Blog at

https://snowbirdrvtrails.wordpress.com/2019/08/10/travels-with-niki-new-3-week-adventure/

SUMMARY:

Our Roadtrek Simplicity SRT “Sunset Princess” completed the journey with no issues or malfunctions of any kind.

Total Miles: 2,678

Total Camping Cost: $608.

Saved $225 with Passport America

Saved $21 with Good Sam discount.

Total Gas cost: $489.

Average MPG: 13 (The roof AC really hurts the mileage!)

Restaurant Cost: $568.

——————————————————————————- To start this 3 week loop from Tampa to Terre Haute, IN from the beginning click here: https://snowbirdrvtrails.wordpress.com/2019/08/10/travels-with-niki-new-3-week-adventure/ ——————————————————————————-

Our Trip Continues: Cape Girardeau, MO to Tampa, FL Notes from the road! From Timber Trails Campground 1276 Matts Lane, Mulberry Grove, IL 2 1/2 hrs/170 miles to…

0 notes

lk-mitogen · 5 years

Text

mental health rant

A friend of mine had an explosive breakdown at work today, and he got into a lot of trouble for it (he yelled at an R4 and an external doctor, both of which are...wayyyyyy higher up in rank than we are lmao, we’re at the bottom rung or lower). Talking to him and his girlfriend and another friend individually, I got the gist of why he did it -- his parents are divorcing, he has financial issues because of it, he’s lost faith in becoming a pediatrician and now has no idea who he wants to be, we work under insane pressure every day and no one gives a shit except when we fuck up, etc etc -- and I remembered me in my first year and a bit of med school, how I was just like that, because my own parents were divocing and it was hellish, and people came to know me as “that person who’s always fighting with the teachers” because I didn’t give a shit who you were, if you were wrong I told you and gave you twenty citations to back up my opinion, and it was just disruptive and offensive and it absolutely made me no allies.

He wasn’t wrong to get angry, to get irritated, but there are ways of expressing it that are better and more productive, but the reason I can tell that is because I’m in a better place now.

And like, he’s not the only one. My best medical school friend had a prolonged breakdown from last year until very recently, and it manifested as panic attacks and fainting spells and she would literally tell me “I have to get fresh air” and leave me alone in the emergency room with 20 patients because she just couldn’t handle it anymore, and I hated her a little bit for it, not gonna lie, she abandoned me when I really fucking needed someone to help me over and over and over, even in the middle of a goddamn surgery once, but I understood, I got it, and she got help and she’s better now, and she’s an impeccable doctor, whipsmart and attentive, I’d consult her anyday.

And like, this guy’s girlfriend has lately been complaining about nonspecific abdominal symptoms, and she keeps wanting to find a medical explanation for it, but I know it’s psychological, because she’s dealing with the same stress we’re all under PLUS her boyfriend is going absolutely nuts and in a violent way, it’s not the first time he yells at people when he’s frustrated, it’s just the first time he did it to people high enough and emotionally alien enough to him to report the shit out of him for it, and she’s his onlly emotional support, he’s the kind of boyfriend who would say “if you leave me I’ll kill myself”, so good luck with that sort of insane pressure, even if you have enough money to pay for your own transportation and food without difficulties like some other people have.

Another friend keeps sleeping in, she just can’t get up, I keep telling her put!! an alarm!! earlier!!! and she swears she does, but she says she can’t help herself from turning it off, because she “self-sabotages”, and it’s so!! fucking!!! frustrating!!!! because again, she leaves me to handle the 6:45 am handoff alone every. single. day. because she can’t get up and she arrives at 7:20 am with coffee and an apology and I gotta grit my teeth and bear it, because I GET IT, i really really do, she’s under a lot of stress and it manifests as self-sabotage, like, boy do I get it, I’ve been there, so I try to be kind and understanding and patient but. My god. I legit tune her out now whenever she starts apologizing because I’m 99.999% sick of it. And like! She’s a great doctor! Her bedside manner is A++ I admire her so much for it, and she genuinely cares for our patients, even the worst of the lot, I really wish I had her empathy (only not really because that’s where her self-destructive tendencies come from, I think). Basically, she’s a great person, just. Man. Wake the fuck up on time, PLEASE.

And this other guy, another part of our team, is a total flake, he keeps manifesting nonspecific symptoms like MY JAW HURTS I GOTTA GET MY WISDOM TEETH PULLED OUT!! one day and MY ABDOMEN HURTS I CANT COME TO WORK I THINK I HAVE APENDICITIS!!! and fucking shit like this every goddamn week it’s something new, and he’s on so many different medications for depression and anxiety and sleeping and staying awake and he’s gained easily 20 kilograms this year and I feel for him, I really do, his life is spiraling out of control and he’s clawing the walls all the way down to rock bottom, and I can see it, everyone can see it, but he’s too flakey to ever get anyone on his side, and part of me wants to tell him, buddy, take a sabbatical, but the problem is, he already took one so he can’t take another, and he’s burned me too many times and not reciprocated emotionally enough for me to reach out and help him, because I will drown right alongside him at the rate he’s going.

And then my other friend!! Whom I care about! A lot!! she’s also super empathic and kind but. SHE IS. SO GODDAMN SLOW. AT EVERYTHING. In the time it takes me to see 6 patients and write their SOAP notes she’s done one, and she’s not the sharpest tool in the box, she sometimes suggests treatments that are...not the correct ones, and so I gotta go and help her out, talk it through with her so she doesn’t heck it up, and she’s super cool about it! But!!! SO GODDAMN SLOW!!!!! PLEASE! LEARN TO BE MORE EFFICIENT!!! Even though I know it’s all a symptom of burnout, too, even I’m not cold-hearted enough to not realize it.

We’re all just. Shambling through this year, trying our best, and our best manifests in different ways when under stress, sometimes it’s just showing up to work. Sometimes it’s just managing to write the note, even if it takes you hours. Sometimes it’s asking your buddy if they can cover you so you can go cry in the bathroom for five minutes and then come back. We’re all doing our absolute best to be here and attentive and empathic, and I am really proud of everyone, but I’m also really sick of being the most sane person on the team. A selfish childish part of me is like, I WANNA HAVE MY BREAKDOWN TOO DAMNIT!! But I’m too old for it, and I’ve trained myself quite well to handle my meltdowns in efficient ways, productive ways, so I can get back on the horse quickly and in a stable manner. I’m proud of me for that too, but it does get tiring, having all parts of my team leaking anxiety and depression and stress in psychosomatic ways.

So I’m going to give in to my desire right now and have a very condensed breakdown rant and hopefully get all my high octane frustration out in one go, and then parse it out once it’s text.

For the past 10 months I’ve lived through the best and worst of people. I’ve given folks CPR to the point where their ribs break under my hands, I’ve had to fist a lady’s inverted uterus back into place in the most body horror moment of my life, I legit feared for my life when this dude going through withdrawal physically threatened me, I’ve delivered an extremely deformed baby with gastroschisis manually and their guts were spilling over my hands and though it didn’t die in my arms it died about ten minutes later in mom’s and it was sad as FUCK, I’ve had 13 12 11 and 10 year old girls delivering babies because their brother cousin uncle foster dad abused them and abortion is illegal in my stupid fucking hyper catholic state and this is a never ending cycle cause mom was 14 when they had them and on and on and on, and this other time I was the only fucking doctor at a public hospital once during an overnight shift and I had to suture this guy’s toes back on having 0 prior experience suturing ANYTHING and they fell right off the next day because I didn’t know what the FUCK I was doing and I still feel fucking awful about that, and at that same fucking hospital some IDIOT put formaldehyde in a saline solution bottle and this poor surgical nurse accidentally poured it into some poor patient’s open abdominal cavity IN FRONT OF ME and the fucking suction didn’t work because that public hospital is a piece of SHIT and that patient totally died and the resident told the family it had been something else and I WAS THERE and it was BULLSHIT, and COUNTLESS other horrible, truly horrible, absolutely horrible things, and I’ve tried to take all of that shit and learn something from it, make something good come out of so much, so much, SO MUCH awful, and I’ve patiently, patiently, patiently tried to tolerate my collegue’s breakdowns, and their eternal lateness, and the residents yelling at me, and the external doctors telling us we’re never going to be anything worthy, and I think I’ve been doing a good job of it, to be honest, at this point I feel like I’ve become this politely smiling shell of myself to survive it, because a part of me feels like I’m living in an alternate dimension where morality and ethics and laws no longer exist, because they simply do not apply anymore, someone has just taken all of that important stuff and dismissed it to be kindergarden stuff, and I gotta nod and go with it or else I’m going to be my friend saying “i need air” and leaving, or “i self sabotage like this” and sleeping in, or “i think my wisdom tooth is aching” and taking the day off or just, simply, EXPLODING at everyone until they kick me out, and like

a big part of me is MOURNING the fact that I’ve become like this, that THIS is what becoming a doctor means in my country, that THIS is the type of formation they require of us. This horrible automaton of a person, that is a symbol of so much goodness but underneath it it’s all lawless shit, it’s all under the water shit, it’s all cover everyone’s fuck ups type shit. I hate it. I hate what I’m becoming. This person that can talk about all this and kind of go “yeah, I guess it’s objectively awful, but have I told you about [this even more awful event]?” because if you play that game there’s always a worse story, there’s always lower, and lower, and LOWER.

I’ll always be glad I chose to study this career, for all it’s morphed me into something I never wished to be. Because I can wade in these muddy rotten waters and help my friends and my family navigate it, I can help strangers and underprivileged people navigate it, I can help all of them from my insider privileges, to make their experience better than it would have been without me, more efficient, more smooth, more right, correct, lawful. I can’t help everyone, and I’m human and I’ll fuck up now and again too, because I’m learning, but I know, firm in my heart, that wherever I go it will be better that I was there than if I wasn’t.

Even if it’s just because the bar is so fucking low it’s difficult not to do better, believe you me, a lot of my colleagues are so fucking burnt out that they somehow still do it worse, and I’ve seen it in external doctors as well.

I’ll take all of these horrible awful no good experiences and I’m going to do better, I’m already better, I will make people have a better experience when they are going through the worst parts of their lives. Even if I had to mess myself up a lot to survive it, I think it’s worth it to spend this one life of mine doing this. I really really do.

#doodle diary #tho no doodles this time

0 notes

cosmosogler · 7 years

Text

i am having PROBLEMS!!!

this morning i did ok, but as the day went on i have been getting more and more restless and agitated. i seem to have endeared myself to some of the staff but i really, really don’t feel prepared for this test. i know only two of us have studied for it but... suzanne told me that about half of the students pass the test on the first try. i joked about getting “a zero or something embarrassing like that” to the staff member that came and visited with us studying in the office and he laughed, but it wasn’t really a joke...

i left a little late but i did ride the bus to the department. i got there at 10 and made myself comfortable in the lounge for a little bit before suzanne and her little brother alex showed up. alex is super into recycling and waste management. i friended him on facebook and he types like a maniac though. he’s my age but he’s not a major so he just hung out for a little bit while suzanne filled out some notes for his doctor for him i guess.

snoopy has started headbutting me in the hair whenever i bend over to pick stuff up. maybe she can tell how stressed i am and wants to reassure me. i don’t know. i’m glad she feels more comfortable around me at least. she let me brush her chest a little bit today. she didn’t eat as much though.

i also got my meds refilled. that wasn’t too hard except getting to the health center through the construction was hellish. i studied with suzanne and jennica and ioannis and soham and taylor for most of the day. i didn’t see keegan. i am listing all the physics grads i know here so i can try to start remembering everyone.

it was exhausting. i liked the lunch i packed and ate most of it... but i guess the difficulty of the material on top of the long hours on top of the stress draining my energy just wiped me out and i felt braindead by 4:30 so i went home. the bus took a half hour to get to the station which was obnoxious, and the bus schedule app doesn’t say which stops go in which direction or which routes go to which stops. just which routes arrive at any particular stop. so i had to memorize the four day routes that go past my apartment complex and the three night routes. that was tiring too.

when i got home i unpacked and got settled in and then made myself a big mac and cheese dinner with some fruit and green machine juice. i also hard boiled some eggs for breakfast- never done that before! it didn’t turn out the best, but i think i might know what to do instead next time. so i will try again tomorrow. i didn’t get sick from the velveeta goop cheese so i’m hoping that means i can handle milk products in general in the future.

but i was so scatterbrained after dinner that i didn’t get any more studying done. i just couldn’t. i barely remember what i did all evening. i want to sleep for a million years and never take the test.

it’s hard to take a 12-hour test BEFORE classes start and expect to get anything more than 10%. i was hoping i could work on my test anxiety a little bit beforehand i guess. or get some kind of pep talk? but all the encouragement and “oh i didn’t either”s i’ve gotten from the people around me haven’t helped at all.

i found out today that i also got a scholarship for 3,000 dollars a year for three years. now that i know the school invested in me (which was apparently kind of risky if i go by what i saw of the graduate adviser yesterday) and then put in extra resources ON TOP of that i feel like i’m going to let everyone down before the semester even begins.

if i don’t do well on this test... that will be a really bad sign for the future, and it will also mean that i have a ton of work to do if i want to catch up and then, worse, keep up.

man. i haven’t even considered that i might do *well* on the test. it wasn’t worth the resources to consider. the chances are basically “not going to happen” anyway. i can’t do well on tests. i don’t do well on tests. short tests, long tests, marathon tests. quizzes. the only thing i contribute to group projects is a lot of questions that i have to rely on my teammate to answer, and then i can’t answer any of their questions.

i want so badly to do well. i keep telling myself that. but thinking about it, it seems so likely that i’m going to worry everyone right out of the gate that it feels like i don’t even want to do well any more. and that’s really bothersome. i don’t like that. i want to want to succeed.

i want to talk to someone about how i’m feeling, but my old friends aren’t really available and my new friends i haven’t put enough time into to really trust them at all yet. and i think if i sat them down and told them how seriously, non-jokingly horrible i feel about the test coming up in 11 hours then i’ll really intimidate them.

when i interact with these new guys i feel like i’m watching myself say words at them. i can understand the words they say back fine, and i am trying to get to know them. but every time i open my big dumb loud mouth and talk about my goddang feelings i feel like i’m hogging the spotlight. like maybe if i cram in just one more snappy comment they’ll like me more. but the whole time i’m also sitting there in the back of my mind thinking, is this really happening? is it me saying those words? why am i saying them? what will these other people get out of it?

i wish i had more time, but i know that if i had more time i would spend it all doing nothing anyway.

i don’t understand why the negative self talk comes back in full force so quickly every time i go a few days without seeing a therapist. am i just not working hard enough?

maybe i’ve forgotten how to practice. practice anything. i sit and look at stuff and i think and think about it but i don’t do any of the things i think about doing. and i’m an active learner. i know this. i know that if i go out and do stuff a lot i’ll get better at the stuff i do. but i’m so tired, and i just want to die, and if i do nothing for long enough maybe no one will miss me when i do die.

i guess that’s the root of it, huh. being invested in my life is hard, and unpleasant, and i know the world will go on without me. there’s no actual requirement, and if there was, i probably still wouldn’t do it even then. all those connections got chopped off over the years. all the tethers to real life vs the life in my head where i am still enthusiastic about stuff but i never participate in any of it outside of my imagination. at this point i may as well just literally be a brain in a jar with a nonstop receipt style printout of nonsense words.

i keep recognizing the problem in new ways but i still haven’t done anything about it. or maybe i do things about it and then stop and forget about it until i rediscover the problem, and hope that using this NEW metaphor will finally get me moving!!! if all the pieces fall into place, then the effort just happens, right? if i can move the information around enough then new things will happen, right? i don’t have to do anything for things to happen, right???

no willpower at all. i used to be so stubborn. now i’m just stubbornly nothing.

it’s... hard, to exert my will in life. it’s hard because i know that saying “no” doesn’t actually mean anything. people won’t stop if THEY don’t want to, because what they want is more important to them than what i want and there’s no way i can actually stop them from doing what i told them not to do. crying, making a fuss, fighting back, calling for help, none of it actually does anything. people won’t help if they don’t want to help. you just sit there in the dark screaming forever and no one comes because there is no one TO come.

i hate that that also applies to me.

i screamed a lot in my nightmares as a kid but i’m a silent sleeper i guess. people don’t wake me up from nightmares. i don’t really call for help even in my dreams any more.

how do you not kill yourself after living like that? after learning that about the world? your own parents don’t stop hurting you because they don’t feel like stopping? your best “friend” won’t stop hurting you because he doesn’t feel like it? your friends won’t help you or even believe you even when it happens right in front of them because they don’t feel like it?

i guess the only reason i haven’t killed myself at this point is because that would require actually doing something. there’s a certain unreality to the idea, like “i can’t actually do that, it wouldn’t happen that way” when i think about it, the same feeling i get when i think about anything. graduating. HAVING LITERALLY GRADUATED ALREADY, WITH A DEGREE. working a real job. meeting people and caring about them. making meals, which i do every day despite being surprised at finding myself in the kitchen every time.

sleeping.

hmm. this might be more urgent than i thought it was. maybe i should call the counseling center during my lunch break tomorrow (between the two sections of test) and see if i can get a quick appointment. not sure when i’d go in this week because of the test, but i only have three hours of class a day this semester. next week could be fine.

making phone calls is weird too but i guess at this point i’m completely uninvested in what’s happening so it’s easier than it used to be.

ok. pep talk. even if i do get a 0 on the test, i am already enrolled. it would be weird to kick me out, even if i will get a lot of worried looks. if i put in the work, and use my resources, and put myself in a position to succeed, all i gotta do is work hard to succeed. so all i gotta do here, besides *actually practice my field,* is learn how to be invested again. i’ve been invested before. maybe it’s like learning to walk again.

in my experience, doing more things than i have energy for, but not so many things that i get burnt out, actually gives me more energy. kind of like working out. if i push myself (but not break myself), and keep myself healthy, then maybe i can learn how to throw myself at a problem in a way that will actually solve it.

is that an ok pep talk? i wanted to try to end on a positive note. finding bad thoughts and replacing them with more realistic ideas is how you train your brain to think in a less self-destructive way. and it’s easier to sleep when i’m pumped up than it is when i want to cry.

#tw suicide #no really #ill try to be ok though

1 note · View note

captain-shitpost · 7 years

Text

Tangled String Chapter 1

Relationship tags: UF!Fontcest, Kustard, Kedgeup, Sans/UF!Papyrus/UF!Sans

Rating: E

Tags: Underfell, Genocide Route, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Established Relationship, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder-PTSD, Amputation, Hurt/Comfort, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Sexuality Before First Heat, Healthy Communication, Healthy Relationships, Smut, Fluff, Slice of Life, Ecto-Genitalia, Soul Sex, Non-Binary Frisk, Fluff, Everyone Acts Edgier Than They Really Are

Summary: Sans has given up. After his fight with the Anomaly, he knew it was only a matter of time before he dusted, and could you blame him for wanting to be with someone he knew in his last moments? But when he took a shortcut to Grillby's, something went wrong and flung him to a new world-one where it's kill, or be killed. His brother is alive but completely different, and a different version of him enjoys pissing him off.

For some reason, they both help him get better again.With their help he may just learn to live again, as long as he lets them in. After all, that's a lot easier said than done.

Ao3 link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10654206/chapters/23576172

Sans was having an oddly good day. He got up this morning to Boss calling him a lazy fuck and kicking him out of bed, ate an admittedly dubious breakfast of bread and mustard, took a nice long nap at his sentry station, scammed a few people out of their money selling shitty hotdogs and eventually wandered over to Grillby’s. Almost 2 hours later, he was pleasantly buzzed and waiting for his brother to burst through the doors in exactly 37 minutes and drag him home when he felt a tingle near the base of his spine, followed by the sound of a large object crashing behind him and breaking wood. He whipped around and saw a previously empty bar table smashed into splinters, the monsters that were near it scrambling away to safety.

The entire bar was completely silent for probably the first time since it opened. It lasted all of 10 seconds until the crowd erupted into activity.

Everyone was scuffling, either trying to back away from the table or trying to approach it out of curiosity. With the entire guard out on duty, the patrons were getting rowdy, right up until Grillby slammed the glass he was cleaning hard on the counter, crackling in warning. Nobody was stupid enough to challenge the bartender’s authority, so once he flicked his hand everybody backed away from the rubble. He approached it, fireball ready to fly in hand, and Sans quietly followed him, right behind his billowing coattails.

He saw the way Grillby stopped and straightened out, the minute stutter of his flames giving away his surprise. He shuffled next to the taller monster to get a better look, and holy shit it was a skeleton.

A rather unusual skeleton, though Sans had little experience with his own kind. They were unusually short (he had been sure he was the only short skeleton to ever exist until now), wearing a hoodie in a rare shade of blue, and slippers. Slippers. They had a style that Sans could appreciate, even if they didn’t have common sense. And he saw all that before he noticed the stream of dust falling out of their sleeve.

Grillby was fast on his feet, bending down to pull the skeleton’s hoodie off, Sans feeling a rising sense of nausea when he saw the way their arm was slowly dusting, the decay creeping up to their elbow. Grillby frowned.

“…Whiskey,” he barked out, Red Bird jumping off their barstool and looking for the requested item. The fireball Grillby summoned changed colours from purple to green and he quickly pressed it into their chest. Sans approached the skeleton’s head, trying to see if they were awake.

He saw that their-his eyelids were closed, just like Sans expected from his lack of reaction. What he didn’t expect was his face being a mirror image of his own, except his teeth were blunt and all accounted for, and he had no scars on his face.

Shit. He knew who this was. He knew who this was and he knew why they were dusting so slowly, despite not being a boss monster. His eyes flickered to the skeleton’s ribs and he was unsettled by the deep gash running across them diagonally, visible through the tatters of his shirt, starting from his right clavicle and cutting left to the bottom of his ribs. A red liquid was pooling from it, dripping slowly down his ribs, soaking into his clothes.

He was pushed aside by Red Bird so he could put the whiskey down next to Grillby. Sans backed off to let them work and pulled out his cellphone, letting out a relieved breath when he saw the battery wasn’t dead.

“grillbz, i’m calling boss. he’s gonna want to know about this,” he announced, dialing the number and listening to the annoying beeping. Grillby barely had time to nod, frown of concentration on his face, before Boss answered.

“SANS I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU FORGOT YOUR MONEY BEFORE EATING AT GRILLBY’S AGAIN I’M GOING TO THROW YOU OUT THE WINDOW.”

Sans grimaced. Calling his brother to annoy him and consequently get nagged at was usually the highlight of his day, despite Papyrus limiting it to once a day to prevent slacking off during work hours, and this was definitely not what he wanted to talk to his bro about. “uh. didn’t, actually. there’s kinda a situation at grillby’s. can you send in one of the guards?”

He heard Boss’ huff on the other end. “NO, THEY ALL HAVE TRAINING WITH UNDYNE TODAY, I’M COVERING FOR THEM. I’LL BE THERE IN A MINUTE,” he exclaimed, the sound of snow crunching loudly audible from the speaker. “WHAT IS THE SITUATION?”

Red looked around, checking to see if all the other monsters’ attentions were on the passed-out skeleton and bartender, then quietly slipped out the door. “a monster fell into grillby’s table. he’s, uh, pretty messed up,” he muttered, swallowing nervously. “fell, as in fell out of thin air. grillbz is trying to keep him alive.”

There was a pause on the other side in which Sans heard only breathing and running. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN, FELL OUT OF THIN AIR? LIKE A SHORTCUT? YOU SAID ONLY YOU COULD DO THAT,” he exclaimed. Red could see a dot in the distance, approaching Snowdin from the forest, kicking up snow as it moved.

“ho boy. listen, bro,” he said, knowing it sounded more personal than Boss, “this is gonna be really weird and i promise i’ll try to explain after we’re alone, but once you get here you gotta make sure the guy stays with us, alright? at least at first.”

The dot was covering a lot of ground, and soon he could see the red scarf billowing behind it. He turned off his phone and stuck it in his pocket along with his hands. He always fidgeted with them when he was nervous, and showing your nerves was a sign of lack of control over emotions. A vulnerability.

Slowing down from his mad dash yet not breaking a sweat, Papyrus stopped in front of him. Sans let out a breath of relief he didn’t realize he was holding as the other skeleton straightened out, scapulas rolled back and chin up, looking every bit the vice-captain of the Royal Guard. Stars, his brother was cool.

He leveled his eye light at Sans, making him subconsciously straighten up. It was a purely professional look, so he responded in kind. “SHOW ME.”

Sans stepped into the bar, stepping to the side and holding the door open for Boss. His boots made an intimidating ‘click, click’ on the wooden floor, and all the monsters’ gazes, except Grillby’s, snapped to him. It was ballsy, making so much noise when you walked. It showed you were confident enough you didn’t need to hide.

They approached the passed-out skeleton, watching as Grillby tried to get him to choke down some whiskey to heal him, apparently hitting the limit of what green magic could do. He saw Boss stop for a moment, a flash of surprise showing on his face, but he snuffed it out before anyone else noticed.

“WHAT’S HIS STATUS?” Papyrus demanded.

“Dead, if you don’t fuck off and let me work,” Grillby snapped back. He was probably the only monster in Snowdin that could get away with blatant disrespect of that level, but given that he was usually cooperative with the demands of the Guard, Boss let it slide this time. There was a mutual dislike yet grudging respect between the two monsters, and Sans figured that if it had been anyone else that talked to him that way they would be eating their teeth.

With a grumble, Papyrus stepped back and turned to the bar patrons, barking out demands and questions at the shaky, half-drunk monsters to gather information. He wouldn’t be getting a lot, but Sans knew his brother would have to write a report about this later.

Grillby suddenly gestured him over, so Sans followed his non-verbal instructions, propping the skeleton up so Grillby could force liquid down his throat. The first few tries ended with the whiskey simply dripping through his thoracic opening and down his chest, but after two more rounds of healing magic the passed-out skeleton managed to reflexively convert the substance into magic. The toughest step done, Grillby’s posture relaxed a bit as he fed the skeleton more alcohol.

Sans looked around at the patrons. Papyrus was keeping them busy with interrogations, and Grillby wasn’t the nosy type, so he quickly checked the monster.

*SANS 1 HP 1 ATK 1 DEF

*1 LV 0 EXP

*He ’s given up.

Sans winced. He had a strong hunch already that, somehow, this was a Sans from an alternate universe. Even if his name wasn’t evidence enough, the horrible HP was. But what really unsettled him was this Sans’ lack of EXP-not only was it extremely rare for adults to not have a single LV, but this Sans had obviously been in a fight to the death. Never killed someone, was in a fight to the death, and looking at his flavor text…it painted an unsettling picture. He wondered what happened to him.

“His HP isn’t rising above 1, I can’t help him more than this,” Grillby huffed, putting the bottle away. He knew the fire monster’s posture meant he gave up on his counterpart, but Sans knew that his HP wouldn’t rise above that with healing magic and food. Grillby got up and dusted himself off, then went to collect the splinters of wood that used to be a table off the floor, breaking them into smaller bits and munching on them as he went to get his cleaning supplies.

Papyrus noticed the healing had stopped, so he interrupted the stuttering of the drunk fish monster in front of him and approached. He looked at Sans’ imploring gaze, then picked up the monster, acting cold but carefully cradling his neck, hand underneath his hoodie so nobody could see.

“WE’RE KEEPING HIM DETAINED IN THE SHED UNTIL HE WAKES UP, I CAN’T RISK HIM DUSTING ON THE WAY TO THE NEW HOME JAIL. WE’RE LEAVING. DON’T START SHIT WHILE I’M GONE,” he bit out at the patrons. They nodded stiffly.

Sans grinned a bit more genuinely as he followed him out the door and into the snow, taking his usual position on his brother’s left side and slightly behind him, around an arm’s length away. He carelessly waved behind him to the bartender, and with a ringing the door closed behind them.

Papyrus shifted the skeleton from a bridal carry into a more comfortable position, keeping him propped up on his hip and his skull resting on his shoulder. Sans payed careful attention to the skeleton in case he woke up and tried to attack. He felt the slightest bit of irrational jealousy that he tried to smother. His brother had never carried him in public like that.

It was always nice to see the way Papyrus relaxed once he entered their home (or shed, in this case), when he was finally out of the eye of the public. His posture was still great, but his shoulders weren’t so tense and his spine slouched into something approaching natural. He approached the bed in the corner, well-made in case Captain Undyne needed a place to crash, and set the skeleton on it. Looking over his clothes, he removed the tattered shirt, having to rip it up to get it off completely, then lowered the skeleton’s shorts slightly to check for underwear. His counterpart must have been as lazy as he was, because he wasn’t wearing any, so Papyrus let them be. His fuzzy slippers came off next and then, with a slight blush that made Sans snort and laugh, Papyrus tried removing his socks.

The right one came off easily and landed on the ground with a wet slap, but when Papyrus tugged off the other one, Sans flinched seeing it squish together, like there was no bone to fill it up. Sure enough, it was half-full of dust, and Papyrus spilled the contents on the floor with a curse after he lost his grip on it. Half the skeleton’s foot was gone, all his fingers and metatarsals were missing, as well as all the bones up to the calcaneus. Papyrus clicked his tongue in disgust and left the room, Sans moving closer to continue the examination.

The skeleton’s left foot was half-dusted, and looking carefully he noticed his right foot was missing the very tips of his top phalanges. Checking the rest of his legs and spine, he saw no wounds and was surprised by the utter lack of scars. Even with 1 HP, there were ways of getting wounds without dusting. So no EXP, no previous injuries, but still somehow in a battle to the death. Sans was finding more questions the more he looked for answers.

His right arm was fine, but the left was missing his entire forearm and the bottom part of his humerus. Sans grimaced. If his counterpart was left-handed like him, that would be a bitch to get used to. He saw the giant gash on his otherwise pristine ribs, and noted that while it still looked new and ready to open again if put under strain, it was scabbed over. His skull was in good shape, and he lifted the lids to see his eye lights flicker weakly into life, blown completely and hazy at the edges, indicating that the skeleton would be out for a while.

His brother came back into the room with a first aid kit and cleaning supplies in his hands, carefully proceeding to clean the area around the wound so he could dress it.

“So,” Papyrus said calmly, much quieter once he didn’t have to intimidate random citizens and careful not to disturb their new guest. “What really happened, Sans?”

Sans watched the way his brother’s long fingers unwound gauze, winding it around the smaller skeleton’s ribs. Where the hell should he even start? “remember when i told you about when i was a scientist?”

Papyrus frowned, securing the gauze with pins. “Of course. It was the first damn time I managed to get you to be honest about anything,” he snipped, squeezing out a washcloth to wipe the dust and red liquid off his counterpart’s bones.

“shit, you’ll never let that go, will ya bro?” Sans snickered. “one of the ideas we worked with was parallel universes. like, apart from our own, there are an infinite number of universes out there. and they’re all different. like, some will be completely different from ours, but some will be similar, just with a few changes.”

Papyrus hummed in thought, frowning at how dirty the water got once he put the cloth in. “So it could be a world like ours, but the monsters are on the surface.”

Sans grinned. Damn his bro was smart. “exactly. or it could be a world where monsters don’t even exist, or never even got trapped underground. hell, there could be one that was exactly the same as ours, except the only difference was that i sold 10 hotdogs instead of 11 today.”

“For fuck’s sake, Sans, I told you that’s illegal. You’ll lose your damn job if they catch you at best, jail time at worst, you bonehead,” Papyrus growled, trying his best to stay quiet.

“hey, it’ll be fine, no need to worry. i know a guy, so i won’t get boned,” Sans said with a smirk, letting Papyrus fume on his own. “but as I was saying, this guy here is probably from one of those other universes. did you try checking him?”

Papyrus dropped the cloth in its basin, the water a disgusting mixture of grey and red. Sans could tell the exact moment he checked, because his expression changed from its default tired annoyance into a look of surprise, the frown deepening as his sockets widened. “Wait, what the-”

“yup. he’s me from another world. i’m not sure how the fuck he got here or why, and i can’t tell yet how dangerous he is. but we should keep an eye on him until he wakes up and i can ask him a few questions. and we’ll see after that. he could cause a mess if he wakes up and has no idea where he is,” Sans explained, looking at his counterpart’s face. During his research, they found evidence of other universes, but they never figured out a way to access them. By all calculations, it was impossible to contact them, so how in the hell did this guy end up here?

Papyrus’ expression shifted into something more somber. “So he’s you? You from another world?” he asked quietly, and if it was anyone else but Sans listening they wouldn’t be able to hear the note of sadness in his voice. Sans gently took his hand, rubbing it with his thumb. He knew exactly what his brother was thinking. He could already see the way his brother was planning their next meals to accommodate the small skeleton’s needs, and the way his eye lights flickered over him he knew he was sizing him up for new clothes. For all his bravado, his brother could be such a bleeding heart sometimes.

Sans raised his brother’s hand and clacked the back of his phalanges with his teeth, more of an idea of a kiss than an actual one, but his brother smiled at it anyway. “hey. grillbz did what he could, there’s nothing else we can do for him. he’s gotta pull through on his own,” he mumbled into his brother’s long phalanges, then lowered his hand. He still didn’t let go, though. “come on, get some food and go sleep. i’ll keep an eye on him in case he wakes up.”

Papyrus scoffed. “You’ll fall asleep after five minutes, Sans, I know what you’re like in the evening. You go first, I need to clean up the floor anyways. Take time off tomorrow to keep an eye on him during the day, for once you have an almost decent excuse to skip.”

Sans chuckled, getting up to stand in front of his bro, then bending forward and giving his brother a quick clack on the teeth. “you’re the coolest, bro,” he whispered, his voice going low and full of awe the way he knew made Papyrus blush. Papyrus chuckled deeply and pulled him closer by the hips, wrapping his long arms around his body.

“Of course. After all, I am the Great and Terrible Papyrus! Everything I do is the coolest!” he said half-laughing, before going in for a second kiss, this one much longer. Sans felt his magic spark, and he opened his mouth with a smile when he felt Papyrus’ tongue lick for entrance.

He stood there for a while enjoying the languid yet skilled movements of his brother’s tongue, the way their magic sparked and ebbed at the point of contact, spreading into his bones. He felt the responding heat in his pelvis, but he knew with their unexpected guest needing attention nothing more would happen tonight. All the same, once they broke the kiss he was reluctant to move again, enjoying the way Papyrus nuzzled his skull into the side of his neck, shivering when he let out a warm, content sigh, way too much like the one his brother made in…other situations. He suddenly really regretted his counterpart’s appearance.

With an embarrassed chuckle and a blush, Sans backed up, watching the knowing smirk on his brother’s face. The bastard knew exactly what he was doing.

Payprus smacked him on the ass, laughing loudly at Sans’ yelp of surprise. “Go sleep, brother. I have this covered.”

Sans grumbled, rubbing his ass. His sacrum stung, and it did nothing to kill his arousal. “asshole. we’ll see who’s laughing when i spank you.”

Papyrus grinned, too cheeky to really sell the look fake innocence. “Is that a promise?”

Sans flipped him off with a laugh, then entered the living room through the door that connected it to the shed. It was a new edition, Papyrus nagging him to make it after Undyne bitched about having to walk in the snow to get to the kitchen. The things he did for his brother.

He grabbed the bag of leftover popato chisps from the fridge for his before-bedtime snack, then took a shortcut to his bed, chucking off his sweater and shoes and crawling under the covers. He knew if he ate in Papyrus’ bed he’d get crumbs all over it, and while he gave precisely zero fucks, Papyrus would have a nervous breakdown.

He listened to the sounds of his brother cleaning downstairs as he ate, calming him down until his eyelids were drooping. He didn’t know what happened to his counterpart, or what would happen next, but he knew the routine he had with his brother was going to get blown to shit. It will be such a pain keeping an eye on the guy, if he even survived.

In the very depths of his soul, he felt a pang of worry for the short skeleton. He scoffed and tried to ignore it, but it wouldn’t let go. He let it carry him into an uneasy sleep.

#undertale #underfell #tangled string #fics

19 notes · View notes

imagine-ikebukuro · 8 years

Text

tagged in a few things

more under the cut!

92 truths meme

Tagged by: @glitzcake thank u!

LAST…

[1] Drink: orange juice

[2] Phone call: a friend of mine, annika

[3]Text message: my brother

[4] Song you listened to: this remix, i’m obsessed with it lately!

[5] Time you cried: aw shit, a few days ago? last weekend? idk man

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] Dated someone twice: no

[7] Been cheated on: nope

[8] Kissed someone and regretted it: yup

[9] Lost someone special: kind of? but… more in a sense of drifting apart rather than someone passing away

[10] Been depressed: not diagnosed, but i’m pretty sure my mental health is not at its best at all

[11] Gotten drunk and thrown up: lmao yes and not only once either

LIST THREE FAVOURITE COLORS…

[12] grey!

[13] turquoise!

[14] burgundy!

IN THE LAST YEAR…

[15] IN THE LAST YEAR…

[16] fallen out of love: nah

[17] laughed until you cried: pretty sure

[18] found out someone was talking about you: people be talking shit 24/7 and all i gotta say about it: I DON’T CARE AS LONG AS IT’S ABOUT ME

[19] met someone who changed you: mhhhh, no not really

[20] found out who your true friends are: definitely!

[21] kissed someone on your facebook list: yeeeaaah? could’ve been in 2015, my sense of time is terrible Dx

GENERAL…

[22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: 90% of people, 5% others are friends i’ve known for several months or years over the internet and 5% are random people or some “celebrities” i found lmao

[23] do you have any pets: no, sadly not ;;

[24] do you want to change your name: i’m fine with my name, tbh!

[25] what did you do for your last birthday: i went to the museum and ate sushi with my family and a few weeks later had a party with my friends

[26] what time did you wake up: today? 8am

[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: watching youtube videos

[28] name something you cannot wait for: to finally be accepted to college and not being nervous about applying for university and everything, but have it all sorted out

[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: she’s sitting in the same room as me right now

[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: if i could go back in time, i would do anything to have my father and i get along properly today

[31] what are you listening to right now: a zelda remix playlist

[32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: actually, yes, i had a huge crush on someone named tom, he was two classes above me during middle school

[33] something that is getting you nervous: the thought of me getting my wisdom teeth removed tomorrow, ugh. also, general organization and planning shit, like applying for college, moving out of my hometown, living on my own very soon, being forced to meet new people, all that jazz.

[34] most visited website: i guess tumblr? even though, lately, it’s probably youtube

[35] elementary: 2004 - 2008

[36] high school: graduated last year

[37] college: i can apply for my first semester next week. if i’m accepted, i’ll start going there in fall this year.

[38] hair color: i’m a ginger, so red-brown

[39] long or short hair: short! i cut it into an undercut like almost 2 years ago

[40] do you have a crush on someone: no, i avoid that shit

[41] what do you like about yourself: my eye color?

[42] piercings: i literally got zero piercings, not even on my ears, but i wish i had an industrial piercing and i used to really want flesh tunnels, maybe i’ll get there eventually

[43] blood type: i actually don’t know :^)

[44] nickname: some people call me lilly, some call me li. the villagers in my animal crossing town call me ukeprince, wot

[45] relationship status: married to the neighbour’s cat which i saw from my window and went out for just to pet it about 500 times by now

[46] zodiac sign: virgo!

[47] pronouns: they/them, she/her, he/him

[48] fav tv show: at the moment i’m watching PLL (but i don’t like it at all so rip) my favorite’s gotta be buffy the vampire slayer!

[49] tattoos: none yet

[50] right or left hand: right handed

FIRST…

[51] surgery: i had surgery in my mouth last year and like mentioned above, i’m getting my wisdom teeth removed tomorrow, if that counts

[52] piercing: none

[53] best friend: she’s not even active on tumblr anymore, rip, her name’s lydia though IF YOU READ THIS, THEN HELLO MY BRO

[54] sport: i’m planning to swim regularly again after recovering and healing up from surgery

[55] vacation: if it counts, my first ever “vacation” was the music festival Rock im Park 2013 with my father and a good friend of mine

[56] pair of trainers: no clue

RIGHT NOW…

[57] eating: nothing

[58] drinking: orange juice

[59] i’m about to: maybe get to playing some loz: botw

[60] listening to: still the loz remix playlist

[61] waiting for: anxious feelings to pass

[62] want: a huge cup of coffee

[63] get married: nopedy nope, i don’t fixate myself on wishing to get married. if it happens, it happens and i’ll be happy about it, but if not, then that’s cool on my terms, too!

[64] career: i’m working on becoming a teacher (i want to teach german, english and ethics in high schools)

WHICH IS BETTER…

[65] hugs or kisses: honestly, it depends, but generally, i’d say hugs

[66] lips or eyes: eyessss

[67] shorter or taller: i don’t care, both is nice

[68] older or younger: as long as it’s pretty close to my age, i don’t mind

[69] romantic or spontaneous: neither LMAO if i had to chose, romantic, bc i’m as spontaneous as a potato, i gotta plan ahead, bruh

[70] nice arms or nice stomach: stomach! and by that i mean any kind of stomach! ripped af or soft, i’m weak.

[71] sensitive or loud: sensitive

[72] hook up or relationship: relationship

[73] troublemaker or hesitant: a nice balance between the two would be cool. let’s be real though, troublemakers always catch my eye, even though i’m quickly annoyed by them just as well wtf is wrong with me

HAVE YOU EVER…

[74] kissed a stranger?: no

[75] drank hard liquor?: yes

[76] lost glasses/contact lenses?: no wtf i’d be walking around half blind

[77] turned someone down: yes

[78] sex on first date?: no

[79] broken someone’s heart?: apparently so

[80] had your own heart broken?: at the time i think i would’ve called it that, but honestly, it wasn’t that horrible, so nah?

[81] been arrested?: no

[82] cried when someone died?: yeah

[83] fallen for a friend?: do lowkey crushes count in which you gush over how amazing someone is? platonic crushes? it’s a thing.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

[84] yourself?: i used not to, but lately i’m more confident i think!

[85] miracles?: not really

[86] love at first sight?: no

[87] Santa Claus?: no

[88] kiss on the first date?: sure

[89] angels?: no

OTHER…

[90] current best friend’s name: Lydia

[91] eye color: greyish-green (if i cry or sometimes late at night they’re really GREEN!)

[92] favorite movie: nightmare before christmas!

10 questions ask game.

tagged by @peacefuldesires thx!

What things make you smile and all warm-fuzzy inside? CATS no seriously, i can have the worst day, but when i walk home and get to pet a cat on the way, i instantly better. i remember coming home after my last final exam all upset and a cat meowing at me and purring and wanting to cuddle with me and i couldn’t help but smile!

What things make you feel a bit sad (don’t push yourself to answer this one)? my current family situation, there’s a bit of drama and fights going on.

What things inspire you to grow? anything and everything, to be honest. there’s new things you experience and learn every single day. things you conquer and master just fine and mistakes you make and all of them shape you into knowing what to do next time a bit more.

The last song(s) that you couldn’t stop listening to? i can’t really think of anything right now, uhhhh, i’ve been listening to the trust me durarara!! ending lately again haha

5. Are you an introvert/extrovert/ambivert? What kind (are you a shy extrovert, super confident introvert, or perhaps a really confused ambivert :0)?: i’m an introvert through and through. i wouldn’t say i’m exceptionally shy nor super confident. i’m somewhere in between. it really depends, around my friends i’m outgoing and cheering and with certain strangers, especially if i know i have to talk with them for literally no longer than 3 minutes right now (i.e. a cashier or someone you walk past) then i’m polite and rather talkative. i just feel exhausted even after spending a lot of time with friends, though the time was enjoyable, but i need my alone time for sure.

What calms you down? the triangle breath! it’s my favorite method to use whenever i feel anxious, upset, angry, or just need to stop and pause for a few minutes. you picture a triangle in your mind (you can even trace it with your finger, or if you can draw it on a piece of paper). you take a breath in through your nose, tracing one side of the triangle. then you breathe out through your mouth, tracing the second and third side of it. other than that, listening to music, taking a nap, petting a cat, watching videos of cats or other cute stuff, sometimes playing a video game.

A character that you really relate to (perhaps you have similar personalities, or maybe you came from similar backgrounds)?: this is gonna sound trashy, but saeyoung choi from mystic messenger and there’s a story behind it too. my friends were playing it way before me and told me “there’s this character that looks just like you, you know nerd glasses, messy red hair, always wearing a baggy black hoodie. he even acts like you, making puns and using memes ALL THE TIME!” and it’s true lmao. also, kaneki ken to some extent? like i really resonate with his personality, the choices he makes, his thoughts speak to me, he’s pretty harsh on himself and goes through ways that are self destructive if he can help others with it.

One thing you love learning? language, it’s just fascinating to me.

Angst or fluff? ANGST, I AM THE ANGST QUEEN, COME ON

If you punch yourself, does that mean you’re strong or does that mean you’re weak? neither and a little bit of both at the same time. let’s go deep in on this one and take the “punch” as emotional self loathing. bashing yourself down definitely doesn’t mean you’re strong, it doesn’t make you tough at all, it only means you’re harsh on yourself. it doesn’t make you weak either. you’re making yourself believe you are weak, but the fact that you endure that and still have the power to do so, means you’re tougher than you’re think.

MY QUESTIONS:

Now that spring’s here, what’s your favorite thing about this season and what do you not like about it?

What’s your spirit animal? Literally. Which animal do you think resembles your inner self and why? (maybe your Patronus, if you know it?

What’s your go-to order at a café?

Do you consider yourself to be creative?

If you could go back in time and change something, would you? If so, what? If not, why?

Where do you see yourself in 20 years from now?

Home sweet home, what makes you feel comfortable in your own home? What’s the overall aesthetic of your room, any colors, textures, an atmosphere, do you maybe keep many stuffed animals or posters or plants?

What do you think is most important when it comes to friendship?

What’s something you improved in since last year?

Werewolves or Vampires, which are cooler?

I tag: @imagine-your-party-hosts || @obsessivefujoshi || @dotaccino || @mollyxmousey || anyone who wants to do this

#i was tagged #shut up liane #long post for ts #not drrr

3 notes · View notes

limejuicer1862 · 5 years

Text

Wombwell Rainbow Interviews

I am honoured and privileged that the following writers local, national and international have agreed to be interviewed by me. I gave the writers two options: an emailed list of questions or a more fluid interview via messenger.

The usual ground is covered about motivation, daily routines and work ethic, but some surprises too. Some of these poets you may know, others may be new to you. I hope you enjoy the experience as much as I do.

#gallery-0-6 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-6 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 50%; } #gallery-0-6 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-6 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

Charley Barnes

is a Worcestershire-based writer, poet and lecturer. She currently splits her time between lecturing at Newman University, Birmingham, and at the University of Worcester. Occasionally, she manages to write some poetry.

Charley’s debut pamphlet, A Z-hearted Guide to Heartache, was published by V. Press in July 2018 and the pamphlet deals with all manner of topics including love, food, and disability. Following this, Charley’s debut novel, Intention, was published by Bloodhound Books in January 2019. Her second novel Copycat and second pamphlet are forthcoming. Recently she was awarded the Poet Laureateship for Worcestershire.

Website details:

Website: http://www.charleybarneswriter.com Twitter: @charleyblogs Instagram: @charleyblogs Facebook: search for ‘Charley Barnes – Writer’

The Interview

1. What inspired you to write poetry?

It sounds very cliché but writing poetry has always helped me to work out how I think and feel about things. I find that when I start writing, I dig out things that I’ve been holding on to, and I shape them into something, and being able to do that felt and still feels like a real gift to me.

The second strand of that answer, subsequently, is that I like being able to make other people feel – which I suppose is what inspired me to start writing poetry that wasn’t about things that I’d experienced, but rather look at things that other people had.

2. Who introduced you to poetry?

My primary school teachers must have done but I can’t remember much beyond the compulsory William Shakespeare studies! I suppose the person who really kick-started everything was an Undergraduate lecturer of mine, who was leading a class on poetry. She wanted to show us all a different side of things. She came into the lecture hall one week and put on a YouTube clip of Byron Vincent performing poetry, and I fell in love. From then on, I wanted to write and I definitely some day wanted to perform.

3. How aware were you of the dominating presence of older poets?

I think anyone who is introduced to poetry through school is always uncomfortably aware of the presence of older poets, because that’s largely the poetry syllabus that’s available. Things might have changed, of course, but when I was studying poetry at A-level the most alive and kicking poet who we studied was Carol Ann Duffy (who I love, incidentally, but she didn’t exactly move me to get on a stage).

When I went to university things changed, slightly, as I’ve already mentioned above. But even then, that was one module across three years of studying! The older poets were inescapable and now, when I teach my own Undergraduates, I can still hear some of the same old school names being thrown about between them.

4. What is your daily writing routine?

I’m not convinced I really have one. When I’m writing something with an end-game – for example, a pamphlet or a new novel – then I’ll write compulsively. Generally speaking I try to do something every morning, because at least then I know I’ve achieved something writerly for the day. If I’m working on a project then I have this same morning-work mentally, but my work usually continues well into the evening (which isn’t a great routine to fall into but I’m sort of wedged in it now).

I was writing a new novel at the end of last year and I really wanted a set routine, but when it came to it I’d do my ‘I want to write this much today’ word count first thing, and then I had to, just had to, add more in the evening – which saw me writing until silly hours.

Maybe after this interview I can sit myself down and have a serious conversation about daily routines!

5. What motivates you to write?

Honestly, I’m a horrible person when I don’t – and that’s a large part of what keeps me writing, even when I don’t have anything to say. Fortunately for me, I often have something to say for myself (as my mother will vouch for). I tend to get my claws stuck in something and then I’m away. My first pamphlet, A Z-hearted Guide to Heartache, gave me space to touch on lots of things, so in bitesize chunks I was able to deal with: broken homes, disabilities, relationships, both good and bad. The subjects might seem broad, but I suppose, in having something personal to say about them, I felt spurred on to write the poems.

My second pamphlet, which is coming later this year, was very much motivated by personal issues again but ones that I know apply to many, many people. It’s called Body Talk and it discusses ‘food problems’ that people develop, that I have had brushes with myself (since dieting, and going in the opposite direction to comfort eating), and airing that kind of thing – having the freedom, even, to air that kind of thing – was a great motivator when writing.

6. What is your work ethic?

Intense – too intense, I think some would say. In an earlier answer I commented that I write compulsively when I’m working on a project; I suppose, across the board, I try to give everything ‘All’ all the time. It’ll backfire on me sooner or later and I’ll need a rest, but hopefully that time will be when I’ve got a few best-sellers out there and I can afford some downtime (a girl can dream).

7. How do the writers you read when you were young influence you today?

I think, as I’ve said above, I was introduced to a lot of the older poets and my formal education in poetry consistently relied on them, so they haven’t influenced me in a conventional way. The poets I read when I was in school influence me but in a ‘aim to be more accessible to everyone’ kind of way. It’s the poets who I read now – Neil Hilborn, Andrea Gibson (for performance) and the likes of Andrew McMillan and Alex Reed – who really have an influence on me, more so than anything I read as a child or teenager.

8. Who of today’s writers do you admire the most and why?

Oops – I’ve sort of started to answer this above. For stage performance, I could go on forever: Neil Hilborn always makes me write something; Andrea Gibson was one of the first performance poets who I fell for entirely because their style is cutting but beautiful and it always leaves me feeling something; Rudy Francisco has a wonderful spoken delivery and he’s such a personable poet, he could be delivering each piece just to you – the same applies to Birmingham’s own Casey Bailey. He has such a careful and controlled delivery, and I truly admire that in performance work.

On the page, I still love poets who make me exhale heavily when I’ve read their work – Alex Reed, Kate Daniels, Nafeesa Hamid – but I also love poets who are playing around with form, structure and even their content, so writers like Andrew McMillan, who I’ve mentioned, and Jenna Clake.

9. Why do you write?

Because I need to. Even if I was doing any other job in the world – something that doesn’t encourage creativity, let’s say, which my current jobs do – then I truly believe that I would still need to write. I think people often say that they write because they have something to say, which I suppose is a fair and reasonable answer, and I in-part agree with it sometimes. But sometimes I write because I don’t have anything in the world to say at all, and writing helps me to work that out as well.

I suppose the short and jovial answer to that would have been: Because I can’t afford a therapist.

10. What would you say to someone who asked you “How do you become a writer?”

I have no idea! I’m three published books in and I’m still not brave enough to call myself a writer. But I suppose if one of my students were to sit me down and ask, I would tell them to write – all the time. I’ve previously told students to treat writing like a muscle, that you exercise and build on until eventually it can hold more weight – or rather, churn out a better first draft – than it did to begin with. Reading is also an important part of it. Sooner or later, as a budding writer, you stop reading books like you’re a reader and you start reading them like you’re a writer: I like this, or I wouldn’t have done that, and that really works! So I suppose my answer is write a lot and read a lot – read things you know you’re going to hate even, just so you know what you don’t want to be doing.

Oh, you also need two readers in your life: one who doesn’t read at all and one who reads compulsively, because both of these people will give you the best feedback you could ask for, especially in your early I’ve-got-a-brilliant-idea drafts.

11. Tell me about the writing projects you have on at the moment.

Right now, I’m actually working on my second novel – that’s my main focus for the next month or so. I’m in the messy crossing things out stage but I’m making it a better book for it (I hope, at least). I’m also quietly planning a collaborative pamphlet with another poet friend too, so when the novel is out of the way I’ll be diving into that entirely. My brain is whirring away on ideas for another novel already but I have a one book at a time policy when it comes to writing, so I’m afraid that will have to wait a little while longer too – but it’s ready and waiting, so stay tuned.

Wombwell Rainbow Interviews: Charley Barnes Wombwell Rainbow Interviews I am honoured and privileged that the following writers local, national and international have agreed to be interviewed by me.

0 notes