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laura1633 · 1 day ago

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Oh wow i have a serious problem i just went over what i wrote to you and i probably should have stopped at the first two sentences but it gets me upset the abuse lando faces i dont even like the guy i perfer oscar, max, charles and carlos but even i know that sending death threats to someone is not okay, and it upsets me that people almost always take his words out of context like when did lando say he actually had a chance at winning the wdc this year? I've seen people bash on him for the latest race where max raced incredibly, but what they dont seem to understand is that the race's terrible race conditions could have actually seriously injured him, we all seem to forget that the guy is younger then max, less experienced, and has huge problems with self-worth that actively seem to affect the way he race's. the fact that max won in the rust bucket that barely seemed to work in favor of the guy is incredable, but bashing on another driver for seemingly not wanting to take a chance with the awfull race conditions (*please note that this is what it looked like to me on what lando was doing that race where he did make mistakes but the weather wasnt helping ether* also note that that franco, oliver and others commented ether on the weather being dangerous, their cars 'Presumably the cars not agreeing with the weather ether', or the fact they couldnt see for shit and out right stated that someone should have a talk with the fia *i couldnt watch the whole race but ive seen snippets of driver radio's and the like, so i cant say with 100% certainty that this is correct*)

So yeah i think that, if i as someone who doesnt like lando, its really concerning what some people say about the guy and as a side note none of the other drivers seem to notice the hate from what ive seen but this last part might just be me. What are your thoughts on the hate lando's been getting seeming to increase anytime he seems to actually want to enjoy racing with the other more popular (equally popular?) Drivers?

🍑anon

Hi anon,

That’s okay, I will respond to this ask rather than the previous one (but just for context for anyone else the previous ask was about fan fiction so wan’t anything mean). This ended up being a really lengthy answer because I have lots of thoughts!!!

I’ll put the answer under the cut and tag as anti Lando despite this really just being my opinion and I personally don’t think I am being particularly harsh here but maybe people will disagree.

Firstly hopefully to most people it goes without saying that sending death threats is not okay, that goes for any of the drivers (and various other individuals that I have seen targeted over the past few years). I also have never understood people specifically going to an individual’s social media page just to spout negativity or abuse at them, if you don’t like someone you don’t need to follow them.

However, I am surprised that people seem to be shocked that Lando is receiving hate online as this is absolutely nothing new and, if I am being honest, I have seen worse (not that this is a competition!).

I will speak from the perspective of being a Max supporter and say that the abuse he has received both online and at track has been appalling over the years. After Silverstone 2021 there were plenty of comments from people saying he ‘deserved’ such an awful crash or that they wished it had been worse. Even this year there were memes going around saying that maybe we needed a repeat of Silverstone 21 (a meme liked by Lando’s dad no less, not that I think we should be blaming children for their parent’s actions!). Not only that but there is rarely a week that goes by that I don’t see jokes online about how Jos is the only one that ‘can beat Max’ or people posting memes about Max being left at a gas station when he does badly. Max needed a bodyguard in Mexico last year because there were concerns over death threats, he’s been booed up on the podium, had people chanting cheat at him in the fan zone, every comment section on his social media includes comments telling him he is a cheat or that his achievements mean nothing. The British media are like vultures any time there is even a hint of controversy. I don’t know why everyone is suddenly up in arms about Lando receiving hate, perhaps its a case of only caring when it happens to ‘their’ driver.

It doesn’t just happen to Max either. I don’t follow Lewis on social media but I still know the type or racist abuse he has faced over the years. Other drivers also receive abuse - Lance for example has vile things said about him, Nicholas Latifi was sent death threats after 2021. I am sure most if not every driver has experienced some level of hate. Social media can be extremely toxic.

Do I think any of the drivers should have to deal with such toxicity? No, but Lando is nowhere near the only one to receive hate and I don’t think someone like Max who appears ‘strong’ should have to put up with things because people get the impression it doesn’t bother him.

Whether the other drivers notice, well probably they do but its not happening just to Lando. Did Lando realise how much toxicity was being thrown at Max after Austria or Mexico? Did he try and calm things with the media or did he double down and make things worse for Max?

As for taking Lando’s words out of context. That definitely happens from time to time, the same as with any driver. Media goes for clickbait headlines and run with them. The problem is that Lando has also said things that haven’t been taken out of context and that people still find distasteful. The comments about it not being talent and being luck did not come across well. I was tempted to give him the benefit on that one and assume he was referring to himself and saying it was not him being untalented but unlucky but then he doubled down by saying nobody deserved to win the race more than George - how can I take that any other way other than the fact he was saying Max didn’t ‘deserve’ to win the race.

As for Lando saying he thought he could win the WDC, if he didn’t think he could win it this year then to me that would be more of a concern. He has a championship winning car and has done for most the season, if he can’t win it now then when?! He should have been confident that he could win or at least put up a good fight. I would have had no problem with him openly saying he is going for the championship. Look at Charles who is not afraid to say that whilst it is still possible he is still fighting. I think part of the problem here lies with Mclaren because they should have been fully backing Lando and hyping him up but seemed to flip flop back and forth about whether they thought he was truly in the fight. It’s hardly going to give Lando confidence when his team don’t seem to be backing him as strongly as they could be.

As for Brazil, Lando didn’t have a great race. George got past him at the start. He made too many errors. Charles finished in front of him despite starting behind him. Max, Esteban and Pierre took a risk staying out on those worn inters, they gambled on the fact the race would be red flagged but also on their abilities and confidence to keep the car on track under those conditions. They all did extremely well and deserved their podium spots. The most important thing though is that all the drivers came away without serious injuries because over the course of that weekend there were numerous occasions where entertainment was put over safety. If a driver felt they had to pit for safety reasons then I am glad they took that step.

Lando is younger than Max but I don’t think we need to baby him in terms of his racing or in terms of giving him a free pass with what he says in the media. He is 24 years old, the same age Max was when Max won his first championship under very intense pressure.

I think you are correct about confidence or self worth affecting him. Whilst I wouldn't like to comment to much on his mentality, to me (and I don’t tend to watch too many of his interviews so I could be wrong) he seems to flop back and forth between being overly critical of himself and then also not taking accountability and saying someone else just had the fastest car or were lucky. I think it would be really good for him to be able to look as objectively as possible about where he has actually made mistakes and can improve but also being able to pick out the things he has done well and be proud of those things.

Overall I don’t think any drivers should have to put up with the amount of hate that they have to put up with but Lando is not the only one to receive hate and, dare I say it, I don’t even think it has been as vicious as some of the things I have seen over the years. Social media is toxic and people should be more mindful and realise these are real people - all of them!!

Also, once again lets be thankful that nobody was seriously hurt over the weekend and lets hope the Fia take steps to act more swiftly when safety cars and red flags are needed and that they put safety above other concerns.

#Max Verstappen #Formula 1 #anti Lando #Mentions of ...#cw: racism #cw: abuse

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sudoka · 16 hours ago

Text

Outpacing the Dawn

Blackwood Mountain is unforgiving. At night the mountain glows with a strange blue shimmer. One that threatens to consume everyone on it. Is tonight the night you confess to Josh? Or has your fate already been sealed?

Ao3

Washington Lodge. 7 Hours Until Dawn.

Rust and blood. The pungent smell filled your nostrils. Pain exploded behind your eyes, and sparks swam in your vision as you opened your eyes. In front of you was an old welded lever and just beyond that, a chain link barrier holding… two figures in the distance. You sat up, picking your groggy head up, the bare concrete cold on your hands as the two figures came into focus. Matt and Josh.

Memories flooded your head. Coming to Blackwood Mountain, warmth, awkwardly diverging from the group to relax, and then… nothing. You had sprawled out on your bed to finish your current read when it happened. The Psycho.

“Good, you’ve finally joined us.” You looked up and around, seeing no one else. The voice was muffled. Calculated. Standing up, sparks came into your vision again, but you pushed the pounding in your head aside.

The name said your voice, but your eyes were trained on the two boys in front of you. They were shackled to a wooden board, feet dangling. And then Matt coughed. Josh tilted his head. They were alive.

“Matt!” You rushed forward, trying the door, but to no avail. “Josh!” You began rattling the door handle harder. Slammed your body against the door frame. It shuddered, but there was no give. “Are you guys okay?”

And then you saw it. Your stomach dropped. Right in front of them was a horizontal saw. An image of the grotesque skull mask flashed in your memories. This was his doing. And you didn’t like where this was going.

“We’re okay! What’s going on? What is that?” Matt turned his head towards you and shouted your name. Josh’s eyes fluttered, he seemed to be fuzzy.

Before you could respond, the Psycho’s voice filled the room again. “So kind of you to join us. When you go in there, be honest with your feelings. Say your goodbyes. Have fun.”

Click.

You pushed onto the door and fell onto the floor. Hard. Scrambling up, you ran over to… your mind stopped. How did this affect this guy’s sick game? It was clear whatever happened in here would affect the outcome. How in the everloving hell would it be determined?

Your stomach sank lower than you thought it could. Be honest with your feelings. There’s no way this crazy guy would know-

“I’ve been dreaming of having Matt all to myself lately. We’ve only ever kissed, but I think he’s going to ask me out after winning the big game. Obviously he’s going to win.” Hot isn’t even the word to describe the feeling etching across your face at the words filling the silence.

“W-What is this?” Matt looked at you.

You couldn’t form any words as the Psycho’s voice continued to echo around the room.

“He said he wants to play varsity, and I really think he’s going to make it big. Is there room for me there? I’ll just focus on tonight and hopefully it ends with me under him.”

Matt’s eyebrows furrowed and you took a step towards him. “That fucker must’ve stolen my journal. These were from a really long time ago. You know the night.” You cringed at your own words.

“Good to know it’s from a long time ago,” Matt replied and shifted his body uncomfortably, trying to wrestle himself out of the shackles. Your heart panged. He didn’t deserve to hear these words, especially since your relationship with him didn’t pan out.

And the person who really didn’t deserve to hear those words was the current person your heart belonged to. Josh glanced between you and Matt wordlessly. His eye caught yours and the contact sucked you into a vortex of the past.

Washington Residence. Two Years Ago.

“Thank you for doing this for me. You’ll have lots of fun, I promise.” Matt gave your hand a squeeze.

“Okay, okay. No need to pile it on. I’m happy to be here for you.” With a returning squeeze, you smiled at Matt. It was a humid August night, the remaining crickets of summer still flitting about. Matt and the rest of the football team won their first big game of the season. And as Matt’s not-quite girlfriend you were obliged to go.

The relationship started innocently enough. You both had a world history course together, one Matt was flunking. The teacher assigned you to be his tutor as one of the star pupils of class. And strangely enough, it turned out Matt wasn’t too dumb to keep up with the course, he just needed to focus less on sports and more on school. With nothing to really teach him, tutoring sessions became more of a rendezvous.

Now, here you were. Holding his hand publicly and entering a stranger’s huge house. It honestly felt more like a mansion with a spiraled staircase and multiple hallways you looked like you could get lost in. Matt had never quite asked you out, but at some point between the make-out sessions you both knew you were exclusive. He always mentioned his ragtag group of friends, with whom you were familiar with from various classes, but never really interacted with.

Within minutes you had already lost Matt. He gave you a quick peck on the forehead and began to chum it up with the rest of his team. You had smiled and motioned encouragingly, but now found yourself alone. Awkward and with no familiar faces, you decided to go to the bathroom to freshen up.

It took you a little longer than you would have liked, with seemingly endless doors, but eventually someone pointed you in the right direction. Finally opening the bathroom door, you were surprised to see a brunette with her head out of the small glass window.

“Hey, are you okay?”

The stranger coughed and you saw smoke permeating around the glass window. “All good! Mind closing the door on your way out?”

“Yeah, sure, I’ll find another bathroom, no problem.” You rolled your eyes and shut the door. It wasn’t a big deal, but what if you had to actually use the bathroom? There had to be another one in this place.

Matt being away was no big deal, but gosh you had no idea what you were doing here. You shook your head just as you heard your name being called. Turning towards the sound you saw one of your classmates, Sam, waving at you excitedly with a disgruntled looking blonde next to her.

“Heyyy, Sam,” You drifted over, excited to see a familiar face. She was ecstatic to see you, bringing you into an emphatic, but brief hug. “Didn’t strike you as the party kind.”

“I’m not, I’m here for moral support,” she elbowed the guy next to her. He had his arms crossed, his glasses acutely perched on his face.

He coughed and then muttered out, “I’m Chris.” His tone was off, his eyes scanning the crowd.

“Don’t mind him, he’s not usually like this. We just can’t find our friend Ashley.” Sam gave you a pointed look and catching her drift, you nodded. “What brings you here?” The question caught you off guard.

“Oh I uh… I’m here with Matt actually.” Both blondes snapped their attention towards you. You floundered under their inquisitive gazes. “We uh…”

Thankfully, a reprieve was here. “What is up, party people!” You turned to see a new face. His features were strikingly unique with sharp blue eyes, and a humble bravado. He donned a big smile, slinging his arm around Chris. Your eyes met his and startlingly, your heart rate was quickening despite your inhibitions.

“Oh, Josh! This is one of my classmates,” Sam introduced you by name.

“Pretty name,” he said casually, a teasing smile on his face. You couldn’t help but return his smile, a faint heat creeping onto your cheeks. Then he turned back to Chris. “Why are you pouting, man? Drinks? Drinks?” He turned to you and Sam. You wondered if he was sober himself. Chris shook his head, but a light smile danced on his lips.

“I’m good,” both you and Sam said simultaneously. Josh threw his hands up in defeat.

“Alright, well, I gotta go make sure Matt and Mike don’t break anything from the keg stands.” And just as quickly as he had appeared, he disappeared, swallowed into a sea of people.

“Did you want to go with Matt too?” Sam asked you. You thought for a moment and then shook your head. “I was actually looking for a bathroom. The last one I was in had some girl literally through the window.”

“Oh, god, not again,” Chris muttered. “Was it downstairs?” His question seemed odd as you were all still on the first floor.

“It was… why?”

“Crap, that must be Ashley again. Last time she got stuck,” Chris sighed in exasperation. “Sam, come help me?”

“Why me?” She laughed, seeming to already know the answer.

“Last time she got stuck I- listen, I can’t just grab her.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll come.” After taking a step, Sam turned towards you. “You can come with if you want.”

Her offer was kind, but you shook your head. “Thanks, but I don’t think having a stranger there for this is the best idea.”

Chris was practically pulling Sam the second your conversation wrapped up. She turned her head and yelled over the deafening music. “We’ll be back!”

Then you were alone again. It wasn’t too bad, but so many people milled about. You were mulling over whether or not to find Matt when Josh bumped into you.

“Whoa, sorry,” he said, grinning cheekily. Whatever was in his cup sloshed over between you both onto the floor.

“No problem,” You laughed, his smile utterly infectious.

“Can I get you something?” He asked, his voice tinged with concern. “I know you said you won’t drink, but we have like… lemonade. Can’t have people over to mí casa and leave em’ dry.”

“Oh, this is your place?” Your eyebrow shot up.

“Yup. I know, an impressive place for an impressive guy.” He brushed off his shoulder proudly.

You shook your head in amusement. “Sure, I’ll take a lemonade. I was looking for the bathroom earlier, but it was occupied. Are there any other ones?”

He relaxed at your request. “There’s one up the stairs and to the left. I’ll go get your drink.” He had a sort of restlessness about him, but he was proactive, you’d give him that.

Upstairs was daunting and vast, the muffled sounds of the party blaring below your feet. Despite this, the respite was quite nice. Eventually, you found your way to the bathroom and entered, looking into the mirror. This night was not going the way you wanted it to. From Josh’s words, Matt was doing… keg stands. Not exactly the most admirable act.

But you shrugged it off, patting your cheeks with your hands. This night was going to be over soon. Enjoying the solitude, you started to wander the halls. The carpet was plushy, the walls lined with family photos of Josh, who you assumed to be his parents, and two younger girls. Sisters, you figured from the striking resemblance they all bore to each other.

The lights were dim, sconces that were not in your tax bracket lining the walls. Something in you told you to turn back after making headway through the halls, remembering Josh was bringing you a drink. The last thing you wanted was to be seen as a creep, especially with Matt’s friends. You had just turned around when voices cut across the night.

“C’mon Hannah, you look fine!”

“Fine is not the word to describe this!”

You froze as two figures made their way down towards you. As they got closer, you realized they were the same girls from family photos.

The one with glasses and longer hair marched right past you, her face clearly red even with the soft lighting. She went into a nearby room and slammed the door shut.

The other girl looked at you sheepishly. “I’m so sorry about that. She’s just… a little sensitive. I’m Beth.” She touched your arm softly. “I hate to ask this of you, but I need to find my brother. Can you just… stay with her for a second? You don’t have to go in or anything, but I’d really appreciate it.”

“Sure,” you said, not sure what to think. In a flash, Beth was gone. You stood there for a second, rocking on your heels when you heard a soft sob from inside the room. Taking a deep breath, you decided to knock softly.

“Go away, Beth!” The other sister, whom you assumed was Hannah yelled out.

“It’s not Beth,” you cringed at your own words, not knowing what else to say.

After a few seconds that felt like an eternity, she responded. “Come in.”

Pushing the door open, you saw her sitting in front of a vanity, her nose and face still red from tears as she looked at you through the mirror.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, concern etched on your face.

She wiped at her face as you stepped closer. “I just wanted to look cute tonight… and no matter how much I look in the mirror, no matter what I do, none of it feels right.”

“I know the feeling,” you said, now standing behind her at the chair.

“This is going to sound so stupid, but I really wanted to impress my crush. Look good for him,” she said with a half sob.

“No… that’s not stupid at all…” You inhaled. “You look so beautiful…” You said softly, not wanting to overstep the boundaries of someone you just met.

She smiled sadly at that. “Thanks… I don’t even know you, but you’re really nice.” She leaned back in her chair. “I just feel like a huge fool. Look at me, dorky glasses, frayed hair.”

“Your hair’s not that frayed,” you said, crossing your arms. “But if it bothers you that much, I do have an idea,” you offered, looking her over. She really was pretty, her soft doe eyes enlarged by her glasses.

Hannah turned towards you now, picking her head up. “Really?”

With a nod, you took a strand of her dark hair in your fingers tentatively. She turned back to the mirror to watch as you started a crown braid on her hair.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t even introduce myself and here you are doing my hair. I’m Hannah,” she said. You offered your name in return, laughing softly.

“We do stupid things for boys. For instance, I’m here for one too.”

“Who?” She asked, leaning forward. You averted her gaze from the mirror, shaking your head.

“That’s fair,” she laughed. “But since we’re friends now, I’ll figure it out.” You laughed at the family’s overt comfort with people. First Josh, then Beth, and now Hannah, none of them backing away from engaging with people.

“You are just like your siblings. I step foot in here and you guys are everywhere.” You started to work on braiding the other side of her hair.

“It’s a Washington thing,” she giggled. “So you’re friends with them?”

“I actually just met all of you for the first time. I came here with Matt.” Your fingers faltered as the words fell from your lips.

“I knew it!” She exclaimed. “He was acting really coy these past couple of weeks.” She noticed the blush creeping on your face and settled back down. “Well, my crush is Mike so…”

You smiled at her confession, finishing her braid and joining the two strands together. “Well, I heard they were both doing keg stands, so who knows if they’ll even recognize us. But…” you said, grabbing a nearby butterfly clip she had strewn on the dresser. “Mike is bound to recognize someone as gorgeous as you.” The clip laid neatly in her hair now, pretty, ornate blue and gold now adorning her head.

A blush crept on her face and she bowed her head. “Thank you…Actually, I know just how to thank you.” Without warning, she grabbed your hand and pulled you through the halls. You followed closely, laughing breathlessly as she brought you into a bedroom.

As you oriented yourself, Hannah busied herself in a dresser drawer. You looked around, the walls of this room covered in horror movie posters, the bed in the middle covered in blue checkered bed sheets, little classic monster figurines lining any shelf space available. It should’ve been overwhelming, but you found it had a certain charm. Your eyes widened, this had to be Josh’s room.

“Aaand, here!” Hannah turned towards you, holding out a flowery silver ring. It looked as if the band was made of branches, intricately winding over themselves. The ring was breathtaking. She noticed the hesitation on your face and pushed it into your hands. “Don’t worry about Josh. He owes me this. Please, take it.”

Your fingers closed over the ring. “I really don’t-”

“Uh-uh!” Hannah held up a hand. “You help me with Mike, I help you with Matt. A ring that pretty belongs on a girl like you.” She broke out into a grin and took your hand again, leading out towards the stairs. Her sudden energy was contagious and you both spoke in hushed whispers about updating each other on how the night goes.

Right before the stairs were Beth and Josh, making their way towards you both hurriedly. Both Beth and Josh looked at you and Hannah and then back to each other.

“Hannah?” Beth asked bemusedly.

Hannah stood up straighter. “I am sorry for how I acted earlier, Beth. I am a new woman. And it helps that I had help from someone” Hannah smiled at you appreciatively. Josh stood there silently, a similar look on his face as Beth’s.

Beth nodded, too astounded to speak. “You are a wizard,” she said to you, pulling Hannah towards her. She mouthed a thank you over her shoulder as they left.

Now with just you and Josh, you turned towards him. “What happened?” He asked you incredulously, a light smile playing on his lips.

“I just went in and offered to braid her hair. She really needed it,” you said, shrugging. “And she also declared us friends.”

“I see that,” he said with a laugh.”Y’know she doesn’t get along with people that easily, so I’m surprised she even said that.” He extended his arm, offering a red solo cup. “As promised, one lemonade.”

“Thank you,” You reached to take the lemonade, your fingers brushing against his you took the cup. “I- um…” You looked at him, feeling flutters spread through your body, as if there were butterflies in your ribcage, bursting to escape. His gaze locked onto you, and the rest of the party became drowned out by the beating of your heart.

Josh cleared his throat, drawing his hand back first. “No problem. Like I said, can’t have anyone high and dry at my place.”

You nervously took a sip of the lemonade, trying to still the beating of your heart. You were here with Matt, you reminded yourself. And then you remembered the ring Hannah had handed to you.

“Oh!” you said, reaching into your pocket. Taking the adorned silver ring out, you held it out to Josh. “Hannah gave this to me, but it looked like it was yours.” You flushed at your words, hoping he wouldn’t be upset.

Instead, Josh looked surprised, his eyebrows shooting up. “It is hers actually, it’s a Washington heirloom.” He sighed. “Did she go digging in my room? All she had to do was ask.”

“I’m sorry,” you said, your fingers curling over the ring nervously.

“No, no,” he waved at you. “Keep it. It suits you,” His eyes drifted down to the ring in your hand, and he laid his hands on yours, pushing your fingers to hold it. The contact sent electricity into your body.

“Are you sure?” You asked, tilting your head.

He nodded, his gaze unwavering from the precious silver in your hand.

“I’ll take good care of it, I promise,” you said, unsure of whether to put it in your purse or not, weighing the least awkward way to do this with your drink in your hand.

“Ah, here,” he said, reaching out. Your hand instinctively moved the cup towards him. Instead, he had taken the ring and was now slipping it gently onto your index finger. For a moment, neither of you moved, both of you looking down at the ring on your finger. It felt comfortable, sliding onto your finger like butter. But it wasn’t too big, settling just right. The cold metal was in stark contrast to the heat of Josh’s hands, still warmly holding yours.

A loud crash from downstairs broke the moment. You both laughed nervously, and you drew your hand back.

“I-I should go check on that,” he said.

You nodded, letting him go a few paces ahead of you, gripping the railing as you went downstairs. The heat of the moment didn’t escape you, and your head swam. Going back downstairs broke your feelings of solitude, an arm immediately slinging itself over your shoulders.

“There you are, babe.” Your face flushed at Matt’s familiar voice calling you babe. You turned towards him, a delirious look on his face. He was clearly inebriated.

“Hey, stranger,” you joked, leaning into his touch. Matt brushed his lips against the side of your head, and you froze. “What’d I miss?” You asked, taking a cautious sip of your lemonade. This was the first time Matt displayed PDA with you, and of course, it was when he was drunk.

“Nothing at all, this party was so boring without you,” He clumsily nuzzled his face into your hair. Your body shifted, feeling the room sway. Despite being sober, the music felt like too much. It was pounding.

“Didn’t look like that when I heard you did keg stands.” You turned to look at him, taking in how his eyes had a distant glaze to them, his head bobbing with tipsy movement.

“‘Ts not like that,” He slurred. You frowned, your mind growing worried about his current state.

“Alright, stud, we should get you home,” You said, patting his shoulder. Matt blanched, shaking his head adamantly.

“No, I didn’t get to introduce you to my friends,” he shook his head.

“I met some of them, don’t worry about it,” I offered, pulling Matt’s hand in an attempt to lead him to the door. But he just shook his head again.

“But we didn’t even-,” He cut himself off, his lips having much too fluid movement for someone as drunk as he was. His mouth was on your neck, trailing up to your ear. His breath was hot and warm. “Please,” he begged. You didn’t know what to say to his words, so you just let the moment overtake you. All of the months of creeping around, of the small dates and stolen moments culminated into this. Your desire and need for Matt took over your head and body. Before you knew it, he was pulling on you, and you were being swept into his arms.

His lips met yours over and over clumsily. Your heart beat in your chest, knowing you had wanted this for so long. You let him take you upstairs, your mind swimming as you both entered a dark room. All that mattered in this moment was you and Matt, letting him push you down onto a soft bed. Yet, somewhere in the haze of making out, a sneaking suspicion grew in the back of your head. You hadn’t made it that far past the staircase… As you opened your eyes, you froze, seeing the dark shelves and shadows around you. Without thinking, you pushed on Matt’s shoulder with your hand. This was-

“Are you okay?” Matt paused, pulling back from you. You had completely froze. The light leaking in from a nearby window caught on the silver ring, glinting as it laid against Matt’s shoulder.

“Yeah,” you answered as you tried to catch your breath. “This is um, it’s just, this is someone’s room, I don’t feel comfortable going any further.”

Matt visibly relaxed at your words, a small grin forming on his lips. “Don’t worry about it.” And then he was leaning back in again, any worries exiting his body. You looked up at him in concern as he dove back in, calculating how to stop him just as the sound of the door being opened and the flood of light switching on caused both of you to go rigid.

“Oh c'mon man, I said the guest bedrooms!” Your body stiffened as the familiar voice sunk into your head. Your eyes squeezed shut, embarrassed of the position that you were in.

“Sorry, your room was just the closest!” Matt responded, unfazed. His heat suddenly left you as he moved to get up. Your heart thudded loudly in your chest as you realized you couldn’t just lay here. Moving to get up, you couldn’t help but catch Josh’s eye. Matt took your hand in his to bring you both out of the bedroom, out of Josh’s bedroom.

“I’m sorry-” you started, but stopped as you noticed that Josh’s gaze was averted as he stared off onto the floor, his hands shoved deep into his pockets. Despite just meeting him, your heart panged. Whatever connection, or spark, or whatever you had felt earlier had just been snuffed out, and it was clear from his expression he felt the same way.

Washington Lodge. Present.

Now, here you were. A full two years later, making the eye contact you had desperately craved with him, but for all of the wrong reasons. This time, his eyes didn’t tear away from yours. They were searching for something, and you felt your stomach flip with dread.

Without warning, the Psycho’s voice filled the dimly lit room again. “Why does Josh look at me like that? It’s like he knows that my heart’s about to beat out of my chest and I can’t take it anymore. He’s so headstrong and arrogant and yet all I want is to kiss him. To hold him. To be held. I can’t keep writing like I’m a teen anymore. This is so embarrassing. I feel something so deep for him that I just feel like imploding.”

“I-” You floundered under Josh and Matt’s gazes as your deepest thoughts were now floating around in the room. Nothing made any sense. Why was this psychotic guy attempting to reveal your innermost thoughts?

Say your goodbyes. The command sent a shiver down your spine. And then it was suddenly like it all clicked. He was going to make you choose. And this might be your last time talking to either one of them. Or both if this sick guy didn’t get the show he wanted.

You approached Matt first, as he was the first subject matter of the entries. “Look, I know things weren’t always perfect for us, you have Emily now, but I wanted you to know that I never held anything against you. And I’m sorry this guy is getting his sick kicks from watching all of this. I care about you, I really do. I was naive and stupid and so many things I can’t take back.” Your breath hitched as you confessed this to Matt.

Matt met your gaze, a certain softness growing in his deep eyes. “I made mistakes too.”

You wrung your hands nervously, your palms beginning to tingle from your next action. It was now or never to get closure with Matt. Closing your eyes, you leaned up and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. His eyes fluttered closed as he savored the feeling.

When you pulled back, you filled your lungs with a deep, shaky breath and faced Josh. Kind, warm, thoughtful Josh. The Josh who never missed an important date in your life, who you spent many nights with just talking for hours or watching cheesy movies. The one you just heard how much gravity was between you and your ex boyfriend.

Wordlessly, you moved over to him, placing a hand on his cheek. He looked at you, his brows furrowed and spoke before you could say anything. “Did you write that?” He almost whispered, seemingly stunned.

“I did… recently actually. Josh-,” You ignored the feeling of Matt’s eyes on the scene in front of him. You had moved on a long time ago and so had he. “-I know you probably don’t feel the same way, but I need you to know how I feel about you.” In case this is our last time together, you said to yourself. Even if anyone got released, who’s to say there wouldn’t be more. You shoved the thought down and decided not to waste another single second.

“I’m so sorry it had to happen this way.” You pressed your lips against Josh’s. He was warm, and everything you had imagined. He kissed you back eagerly, and you felt all of your reservations go. The kiss was affectionate, and sweet, and you felt as though you could kiss him for eternity. You pulled back from the kiss to see his reaction, every part of you burned to know how he felt, you needed to hear it.

Words formed on his lips before the world was plunged into darkness again. Your blood ran cold. Someone was pulling you away roughly, your feet dragging on the hard concrete as cold leather gripped your skin. “No!” you exclaimed, struggling against who you knew was the psycho. His show was over. The next thing you knew was the increasingly familiar scrape of the cold concrete against your skin.

The lights flicked on again and so did the saw, whirring to life in a roar.

“Good job, that went about how I expected.” The psycho’s dismembered voice filled the chamber. You got up and gripped the chain fence separating you from Matt and Josh.

“No, please, I’ll do anything you want,” you begged, shaking the fence. The saw started to move and your heart plummeted. You moved to the door again, trying desperately to make it move. It didn’t even shake in its frame.

“You made your choice,” the Psycho drawled.

“Bullshit, I made no choice!” you yelled, throwing your weight against the door again. “Let them go!” You kept rattling the door, but you couldn’t help but look at Matt and Josh, both struggling against their restraints as the rusty saw reached what looked like a fork in its track. And then it turned left. Towards Josh.

“No, no, please!” Tears filled your eyes as you got more frantic against the door. Slick sweat on your palms caused your hand to slip from the handle.

The sound of Josh saying your name caused you to turn your attention towards him. His eyes were widened in fright. “I want you to know that I-” but his words were too little too late. Screams pierced the air as the blade plunged into his stomach. From you. From Matt. And from Josh himself. The sight and smell of heavy iron filled your nostrils. The smell was nauseating as Josh yelled, his entrails being spilled out onto the floor as the saw cut deeper. And deeper. His body went still, his head limp.

Click.

You tumbled onto the floor, your vision swimming as you began to feel light headed. A blurry vision of Josh’s body filled your sight. Of what was left of him. He was silent. And you couldn’t comprehend it.

“Josh!” You shouted, pulling yourself up. You were going to go to him. He had to be okay, this wasn’t real. Something fastened around your waist.

“We have to go,” Matt said, pulling you against him.

“No, we have to help him,” you said, tears blurring your vision as snot began to drip from your nose.

“He’s gone. He’s gone and we have to go. Now.” Matt’s voice was gentle, but he was firm. Everything in you struggled against him, your hand reaching out frailly towards Josh’s motionless body. Your knees were weak as you fought against Matt.

Nothing was real. You had just kissed Josh. Felt his warmth against you. He was just there, alive and breathing.

In your weakened state, Matt was able to drag you out of the chamber. The door swung closed and clicked behind you both, a sharp sign of no return.

“I can’t leave him here,” you cried out, shaking in Matt’s arms. He was warm, blood from his letterman jacket seeping against your skin. It was hot and sticky. And that’s when it hit you. This was Josh’s blood. Still warm.

“We have to go,” Matt said. He tightened his grip on you. “If that sicko comes back, what then? We need to find the others and get out of here.” His voice was empathetic, but unwavering. He wasn’t going to let you go.

You nodded, letting your body go slack despite everything in your body screaming at you to go to Josh, even if you couldn’t. You wanted to just rot here with him. Everything moved in a blur as Matt guided you both out of the basement. The lodge felt ice cold, devoid of all life. Just hours before you had been talking to Josh on the couch, your legs curled up as you hung onto his every word, the fire softly roaring. And now, there was nothing.

The weather had begun to pick up outside, the snow and wind swirling. At this rate, it would be an arduous task to make anything out. The trees cast long shadows on the night, engulfing everything in darkness. Both you and Matt walked quickly, your scraped knees burning from the cold under your jeans. Tears flowed from your eyes, still unable to process everything they had just seen. They felt like daggers of ice dragging across your face.

“It’s going to be impossible to find the others like this, " Matt said, raising his hand to his face to shield his eyes against the poor visibility.

The others. You had almost completely forgotten that the entire friend group had collected on the mountain. Sam, Chris, Ashley, Mike, Jess, and Emily…

“Shit,” you replied. A shiver passed through your body, both from the cold mountain air and the thought of the others with the psycho killer on the loose. Were they okay? Were they safe? You didn’t think you could take any more losses tonight.

Matt softened for a moment as you shivered, and took his jacket off, draping it onto your shoulders. It was little comfort, but you appreciated the sentiment nonetheless. The worn out letterman jacket was warm, the right sleeve completely drenched in blood. In Josh’s blood. Your stomach churned at the thought and you fought to keep the nausea down as you traversed the woods with Matt.

You looked over at Matt silently. Taking the jacket off left him in nothing but his jean jacket and gray sweater. Despite losing the bloody jacket, splatters of blood still trailed over his face and neck, his right sweater arm stained with red. He looked over, catching your gaze and offered his clean arm. You took it gratefully, happy to have something to ground you.

The moment was short lived as a sudden crunch in the distance caused you both to snap towards the origin of the noise. Was it a friend? Or worse, had the psycho followed you both? No, it couldn’t be the psycho, there were three frames now emerging from the darkness.

You released your breath as the figures came into view in the pale moonlight- Chris, Ashley, and Emily.

“Whoa, what the hell happened?” Chris rushed forward first, taking in the sight before him.

Ashley started to chip in, “Are you guys ok-”

“What the hell is going on here? Where were you, Matt?” Emily stepped forward, pushing past Ashley and Chris to look at you and Matt. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of you- Matt’s ex-girlfriend, clutching his arm in his jacket.

Matt’s words tumbled out in quick succession with yours.

“There’s a killer on the loose, and he’s after us all-”

“I can’t, I don’t know. Josh is- We need to leave,-”

Emily’s eyes widened, and she moved closer to you and Matt. “Holy shit, is that blood?” Her cold demeanor dropped as she shifted closer in concern. Her words caused you and Matt to fall silent. This is not what you had expected from her. Emily usually treated you brusquely. You couldn’t really blame her given how Matt was not known for concise story-telling. Now all three sets of eyes gazed at you both intensely.

“That’s what we’ve been saying. There’s a killer here and he’s after all of us. We barely escaped with our lives and he’s probably going to try to catch up to us.” Matt shook his head, and stared down at the ground. This was affecting him more than he was letting on.

Chris and Ashley exchanged silent glances.

“And… where is Josh?” Ashley asked quietly, placing her hand on Chris’ faintly. Your chest heaved. All eyes were on you. You could feel your heart constricting as the words refused to leave your throat.

“He’s… he’s…” You kept trying to shove the words out, but they wouldn't come.

“He’s gone,” Matt stepped in. “He’s… Josh is gone.” Your grasp released from Matt’s arm as his words hit your ears.

“Oh god,” Emily said, placing her hand over her mouth. Ashley leaned into Chris sorrowfully.

“We need to go. Right now, we need to find a way off of this mountain,” Matt said, the urgency in his voice picking up.

“What we need is to go get help,” Emily interjected.

“And what about Sam?” Ashley piped up. Her head turned toward the lodge frantically as she spoke. “She’s still in there.”

Silence fell on the group with these words. It was as if everyone froze, unsure of what to do.

Finally, Chris spoke up. “Okay, Ashley and I will go find Sam, Jess, and Mike; the rest of you contact the authorities.”

“Okay, but we need to go. Right now. There’s an old radio tower in the distance we can probably get to,” Emily pressed. She dusted the snow off of her leather coat.

You sheepishly nodded. You were in no condition to try to go back into the lodge, the images still fresh and pervasive in your mind.

The group split, Ashley and Chris towards the lodge; you, Matt and Emily towards the old radio tower. The three of you moved in hurried silence, the wind howling as it picked up through the trees. Your hand had dropped from Matt’s arm, instead Emily resuming her place and holding his hand.

Things weren’t particularly tense between the three of you, both you and Matt had made things clear to Emily, his new girlfriend, that things were over.

“I’m sorry about what happened to Josh,” Emily said, glancing over at you again. Her gaze was empathetic, but her eyes glossing over the bloody letterman jacket didn’t escape you.

“Em,” Matt said tautly.

“What? How she felt wasn’t exactly a secret,” Emily whispered much too loudly.

“It’s okay. I’m okay,” you lied, releasing a small breath. “I appreciate it, Emily, really.” That part was true. Even though you and Emily didn’t have the best relationship, she was surprisingly amicable about your past with Matt. Her concern here was a welcome one. But you couldn’t help but feel a stab of resentment at her part in the drama the last time you all were gathered here on the mountain.

The silence returned. Your thoughts became a mess. Every Washington you had grown to love was gone. Every single one cruelly ripped from your hands. And it was all this psychopath's fault. A growing anger bubbled up inside of you. If you ever faced this guy again, you knew you would tear him a new one, even if it was the last thing you did. The cold rippled through you and you pulled Matt’s jacket closer into you. The blood from the sleeve was now cooled, leaving an uncomfortable sticky feeling on your skin.

Thoughts of Josh floated around in your head. His smile. His laugh. The way he always put others first. Even when they didn’t deserve it. Your fingers moved to idly play with your silver ring, the one he had placed on you that first night you met. Hannah’s gift. You had no idea how much things would change, that your relationships with them would deepen so much. That this small token would be all you had left of your best friend and her brother that you were in love with. You had never taken it off, it was like a permanent fixture on your body, and now a permanent reminder of all of your losses.

As the silence stretched on, you all passed a gate. It was locked, offering no shortcuts and no easy passage on the cold, desolate trek. That is, until you stumbled upon a small outpost.

“Finally, something,” Emily exclaimed.

“Yeah, something,” you replied, a sudden glaze in your eyes as something shiny reflected in them. Matt and Emily followed your gaze as you pulled an axe out of the outpost door.

Matt frowned as the axe came off of the wood cleanly. You turned it over in your hands, feeling the hilt. It was a little heavy, but nothing you couldn’t handle with the sound of your own blood pumping loudly in your ears.

“Nice catch,” Matt said with your name. “I’ll hold onto it.” He reached for the hilt, and you bristled.

Matt paused as you drew back, caught off guard. You coughed and pulled the axe closer to you.

“Finders keepers,” you joked weakly. Your grip on the axe tightened. A whole new web of possibilities opened up with uncovering the weapon, the feeling fluttering in you. “Actually-” you started slowly, testing the waters. “- I think with this, it’d be best if I found the others. Ensure their safety.”

“What?” Emily turned towards you. “No way, we found it, it should be protection for us. Matt.” She looked at Matt, whose frown had only deepened. You bristled again, feeling as if he could read your every thought. It was as if he could sense the pure anger flowing through you, despite your calm exterior.

“She’s right, Emily.”

“What?” Both you and Emily looked at him incredulously. Anyone in their right mind would want to keep the axe. You knew that much.

“She’s lost enough tonight. We’ll be okay, I’ve got enough brawn for us both,” Matt flexed his muscles, laughing haphazardly. You cracked a soft smile at his attempt to diffuse the situation.

“Unbelievable.” Emily threw her hands up. “You two are the worst do-gooders I’ve ever met in my life. It’s us, or the psycho.”

“Don’t worry. If I come across him, I’ll take care of him.” The glint returned to your eyes as you gazed at the axe. “Better that than letting him find us.”

Emily shifted uncomfortably. “Fine, just make sure you swing hard.” You nodded, your lips pressed into a hard, thin line. With the axe, you had a new power. One that was going to take what you wanted. It would save you all.

Matt saying your name momentarily pulled you back to reality. “Please be careful,” he said, eyeing you nervously. “I wouldn’t let you go on your own, but we need to get help.”

“Good luck,” you said, a sense of finality in your tone. This might very well be the last time you saw either of them, and you knew it. With your new weapon in hand, you trudged off towards the lodge, a renewed sense of vigor in your step. This was your chance to set things right. It wouldn't bring them back, no, but it might sate the bubbling in the depths of your stomach. The feeling gnawed at you, hungry for more. Hungry for revenge.

#josh washington #until dawn #Josh Washington x reader #josh until dawn #until dawn josh

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umbramoons · 3 days ago

Text

TECH MOMENTS PT. 5

The Bad Batch S1 E1: Aftermath

This one's a doozy, my friends! Enjoy 100+ bullet points and 50+ pics of our favorite clone genius!

- Running through the droids, putting an explosive on everyone he can get his hands on. ❤

- “Hey, clanker! Catch!” (This was the moment I realized that I like him. My brain did a double take, like: "Wait he's attractive.") ❤

- Kicking a droid for no reason ❤

- Walking off the battlefield like it wasn’t even hard.

- I love the little distracted wave he gives General Billaba. Everything about him is just so endearing to me.

- His voice is a little more deep and raspy than usual while he’s talking about the war ending. Gosh, I’m down so bad for this man.

- He’s the only one who doesn’t have a blaster drawn when they first approach Caleb.

- Tech is one of the ones sent to talk to the regs about what’s going on. Echo makes sense since he’s technically still a reg, too, but why Tech? Because he’s the least likely to cause a problem.

- He’s also the first one to run to talk to the regs. Taking initiative once again.

- Tech: “The regs have been ordered to execute the Jedi.”

Hunter: “What? Which Jedi?”

Tech: “All of them.” The disbelief in his voice is subtle but there.

- This is a glow-up, people (a small one since he was already pretty, but still)! Tech is gorgeous, and no one can tell me otherwise. ❤

- I love his tiny smile when he finishes explaining how long they’ve been gone.

- The disappointed look on his face when Wrecker doesn’t understand his explanation of how long they’ve been away from Kamino.

- He has the smallest smile on his face when he hears that General Grevious has been defeated.

- “Just like I said.”

- He looks so done when Wrecker punches him.

- When the clones pass by with the body of a Jedi, it’s Tech Hunter shares a look with.

- “Excuse me, trooper, what division are you from?” *gets shoved aside* “Oh. Well, they seem the same to me.” ❤

- He immediately starts working on something once he gets back to their barracks.

- All the formulas and calculations on his bunk wall… a result of his sleepless nights, I’m sure.

- I love the curious look he gives Crosshair when he says they didn’t complete every objective.

- “And my exceptional mind.” I love him an unhealthy amount.

- “My guess is we are immune to the effects of the programming.” *looks at Crosshair* “Though I can’t be one hundred percent certain of it.” He looks so. Kriffing. GORGEOUS.

- “You are more machine than man. Percentage-wise, at least.” His little reassurance to Echo at the end.

- Hunter: “This is one meeting I don’t want to miss.”

Tech: “First time for everything.”

- The way he’s just looking at his datapad throughout the meeting.

- Stepping out of line to ask Hunter what’s wrong. First of all, noticing something’s up with him. And second, it takes some serious courage to break formation like that during such an important briefing while all your superiors can clearly see you.

- “Still don’t think the regs are programmed?”

- Crosshair: “Republic, Empire, what’s the difference?”

Tech: “The systematic termination of the Jedi is a big one for me.” ❤

- “Adolescent human female. Origins... uncertain.”

- Tech’s mouth quirks up in a tiny smile when Omega says she was wondering when they’d come back. He already likes her.

- His look of surprise when he realizes Omega knows his name.

- The way he stares after Omega in wonder. ❤

- There’s this split second (right after Hunter says "everyone's talking about it) where it looks like he’s looking directly into the camera, and it’s just like, “Well hello there, sir.”

- “Hopefully not mental. Clearly, we’d never pass that.” It's okay, I'm not neurotypical either, babe.

- Leaning around Hunter to see Omega.

- “You want to sit with us? That’s never happened before.”

- He can’t stop grinning at Omega after she says she likes him and his team for not fitting in. ❤

- I love the way his expression shifts when Hunter asks where Omega’s family is. Like, "that's actually a really good point."

- The way his face instantly drops when the regs make a jab at them. At Omega. He’s used to being pushed around, but he’s not pleased to see this precious girl being mocked.

- I love the way he’s all squared up in the background of this fight.

- Calling out a warning to Echo and then running over to the clone who knocks him out. It doesn’t show it, but Tech definitely threw a punch at the guy for hurting his best friend. ❤

- “We’re more deviant than we are defective.”

- “Then we are not being reprimanded?” He’s so used to getting in trouble.

- His eye roll when Wrecker charges into battle without thinking. I thank God every day that we can always see his eyes with those goggles. ❤

- He’s not at all phased by passing through live rounds to get to Wrecker. He’d gladly walk through fire for the people he loves.

- “Wrecker, are you alright?”

- That little head shake when Hunter signals a plan to him. Like he doesn’t think it will work, but he knows they have no other option.

- Wrecker: “Aw, I hate hand signals!”

Tech: “Perhaps if you memorized them?”

Wrecker: “Why don’t you memorize them?”

Tech: “I have.”

- They’re in the middle of a battle, but he’s sitting against those barriers so casually.

- The way he stops Wrecker from crushing the droid.

- Reprogramming the droid, then choosing to ride on its shoulders like a legend. (Note that it looks like he’s the only one to specifically get an impressed reaction out of Tarkin with his performance in this simulation) ❤

- Can I also just say how impressive that was? He completely reprogrammed a hostile droid to follow his commands while under heavy fire. In less than a minute. What a man, what a legend.

- “Wrecker. Look alive.” I feel like he has the capacity to lead, he just doesn’t want to.

- Reaches out to Wrecker (who calls him buddy). “I’m -” *flops down* “not going anywhere.” ❤

- I love the way he takes a deep breath and straightens his posture for a second after Echo and Wrecker help him up.

- “There’s a fundamental difference between taking fire in battle and being used as target practice.” I love how upset he is about this. Also, he’s also backing up Wrecker’s feelings with his own here.

- None of the others make eye contact with Tarkin when he’s examining them. Tech does and practically glares at him. ❤

- I love his expression shift when Tarkin says the insurgents are Separatists. I can’t place the expression, but I love it. It’s almost like “Come on, I thought the war was over. Oh well.”

- I love his little disappointed look when Echo says he can’t crack the files. And then how he immediately offers to help.

- “That’s not going near my rack. I refuse to sleep by a projectile again.” AGAIN?!

- Tech comes right behind Hunter to exit the ship (and then leads them for a significant portion of their walk). Possibly symbolizing his position within the squad.

- Echo: “What was that?”

Tech: “You don’t want to know.” 😑

- “Easy, Wrecker. Your programming’s kicking in.” I legit laughed out loud at this when I first watched the show. ❤

- His datapad lighting up his eyes makes him look so beautiful.

- Hunter always relies on him.

- The way he instantly senses that something’s wrong when he can’t see any droids in the camp.

- “There aren’t any droids, Wrecker.” You can tell that he’s starting to get a little agitated about this situation.

- Defending both sides when others choose one.

- Tech is the first one to ease up and stand down. Almost the second he hears Hunter start talking, like he knew he was going to tell them to back off. (And his eyes look stunning in that shot when he does. They immediately soften and become non-threatening.) You can just tell how much he and Hunter respect and trust each other. ❤

- He looks so pretty in this warm light of the camp. Who am I kidding, he looks good in every lighting.

- Geeking out over Saw. (And Saw is absolutely staring him down as he does. Like, they’re having a staring contest until he’s handed a weapon to examine. I don’t like that foreshadowing.)

- I also love the look on his face when Cross says “Is that a request?” I just always love his expressions.

- The way he leans forward with the tiniest hint of concern when Saw tells them to look at the insurgents they were sent to destroy. Anyone who says Tech is emotionless hasn’t been paying attention to him at all.

- His offended look when Saw said he thought he was the smart one.

- He is absolutely GORGEOUS in that shot where Crosshair says that the war is over. He’s literally flawless, and he’s perfect.

- “At least with the Republic, we knew where we stood. Tarkin and this Empire are a whole different story.”

- He literally jerks back in surprise when Cross says that Hunter isn’t fit to lead their squad.

- The concerned and confused look on his face when Hunter brings up Omega.

- “I would not discount Omega’s insight. A state of heightened awareness is not unusual for an enhanced clone such as herself.” Standing up for Omega before he knows her that well. ❤

- “When Nala Se spoke of five clones, Tarkin assumed that meant us, but Echo’s a reg. The fifth is Omega.”

- “Well, I thought it was obvious.” Leans against the doorframe like he couldn’t care less. ❤

- That glare when Crosshair suggests leaving Omega on Kamino.

- His little breath before saying “this is unusual” just makes him feel so alive to me.

- I love how he’s constantly glancing over and making eye contact with Crosshair. These two were so close.

- HIS BLACKS. TECH IN HIS BLACKS. Hallelujah for this scene. We wouldn’t be nearly as familiar with everyone's body types without it. Gorgeous man. Everyone likes to talk about Hunter's tiny waist, but Tech's is just as snatched.

- “Well, the mission wasn’t a total failure.” Of course he’s the first one to notice Omega. ❤

- His face is so warm and happy when he sees Omega. And then he immediately shifts to unamused at Crosshair’s complaint. ❤

- He shoots another tiny smile Omega’s way when Hunter says they were looking for her.

- “I never thought you disobeying orders was a problem.” Facts, love.

- Crosshair never directs his anger at Tech. It’s always at the others. Even if Tech does say something he doesn’t like, he doesn’t get mad until someone else expounds upon it, and then he snaps at them. Cross clearly has a favorite here.

- Cross starts shaking his head with clear distress and frustration when Wrecker says that they disobey orders all the time, and you can see that Tech notices it. He tilts his head and frowns a little bit. ❤

- The concerned look he and Echo exchange when Crosshair starts to confront Hunter again.

- He looks freaked out when the guards hit Hunter.

- Reaching out for Crosshair when they take him away. That broke my heart when I first noticed it. ❤

- The way he bounces his leg when he’s thinking hard. ❤

- “I’ve got it! Why didn’t I think of it before?”

- He talks with his hands. ❤

- Covering his mouth when Wrecker talks too loud.

- Running his fingers over the wall to see where the weak point is. ❤

- The confusion and worry on his face when Wrecker says it still didn’t work. Gorgeous, gorgeous.

- The way he glances over at Hunter (or probably the guards) before going over to help Wrecker. Ugh, he’s literally perfect.

- “Oh, yes it did.” ❤

- Bending a metal panel with his bare hands like it’s nothing. My man is strong! I love how he doesn’t follow the trope of the nerdy character being weak.

- Wrecker: “I’ll never fit through that!”

Tech shakes his head. “Astute as always, Wrecker.”

- I love the way he rolls his eyes and facepalms when Wrecker blows their cover.

- Grabbing a blaster and stunning the last conscious guard. He shoots twice, just to be sure, and carries the blaster. He’s such a boss.

- Turning to confirm the guards aren’t dead (or going to follow them) before leaving the brig.

- Tech looks so cute when he tells Wrecker to hold still.

- I love how Tech serves as the unofficial medic (with Echo’s help, of course).

- Omega: “I guess I got lucky.”

Tech: “She's not the only one.” *gestures to Wrecker without looking up* ❤

- "What's the plan, Hunter?"

- Omega: “What about your friends? Could any of them help us?”

Tech: “That would be a short list.”

- The way he leans in and smiles so brightly when Omega asks that question.

- His smile when Hunter tells him to plot a course for J-19. ❤

- I love the way he shakes his head with clear affection when Wrecker cheers this time.

#tech moments #tech tuesday #the bad batch #tbb #sw the bad batch #star wars tbb #bad batch #tbb tech #star wars #sw tbb #tech bad batch #tech tbb #bad batch tech

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haunted4kent · 12 hours ago

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crumpled memory. t . todoroki

about ; in the midst of distraction in the aftermath, the mind lingers on one.

word count ; 3.5k

a/n : based on reccomendation from the one and only @seneon hopefully this breaks hopes and dreams idk <3

touya sought freedom, a voice, and an end to the burning hatred in his bones. when he stood down, letting the piercing ice his family enclosed him in melt. he had a selfish desire to mend.

he went home with a glimmer of childhood nostalgia in his heart. the breeze of the wind rocking the swings in the park, the ocean singing at night, and the mountains around them reminded him of you.

the winter was even quieter than the ones he’d spent alone. he knew that you were around, he could be okay with it if you thought he was dead, but the thought runs through his head, you will not allow him to atone. he knows the horror that ran through your bones watching him on that damned broadcast. each one of his decisions would haunt the view you had of the man he became.

“touya.” natsuo’s voice snaps him out, and he gestures at touya’s hands. “you alright?”

he sat clenching a photograph, the sides folding in from the pressure of his hold. he looks down and begins to flatten it out. “yeah, i was just thinking.”

natsuo speaks with sincerity. “you need to call them.”

touyas throat speaks for him, a chuckle bubbling out of his throat. “i don't know where she is natsuo.” his gaze is helpless, it's not like he hasn't tried to find you before, but so many media pages hadn't been posted on in years, he didn't think youd ever get back to him, let alone want to be affiliated.

“their mother still works at the clinic.”

you were stubborn, and determined, knew your morals, the list could go on about how well matured you were for a child. touya had known that since he met you. who had no desire to look for an idol, someone to praise. yet, you still accepted the complete opposite, it was a feeling so distinctly different from the acceptance of a peer, a parent, or a trusted adult. you who had no urge for words of approval, everything he wished he could have been.

this was different, more complex than just simple permission from a mother to speak to their child, one someone could be so proud of.

he was scared, in the midst of his thoughts to push it away, get upset at natsuo for even suggesting it. he was mature, reasonable, and allowed himself to make a gentle choice.

…

the snow hugged the mountains, and his mind could not forget how badly he wishes it was a winter day the last time he went to sekoto peak. you’d told him not to, and still in the belief his father had heart in him, he still went.

“the seasons dry touya, you can't push yourself or you'll get hurt.”

the words played in his head like they’d come from the radio, it didn't sound right, it was broken and mixed up . he had been forgetting for a long time, that when he dreamed and you were there, you never spoke, and what you've said before comes to him in his voice.

you knew that forest better than anyone, he should have listened. it's when he started going up there that he met you. a quiet child in a puffy pink jacket that bothered him to touch, too scratchy to bear. your dad was a fisherman who worked in the mountains hunting in the winter, he never let you near touya often, just to run off and make snow angels where he could see.

he didn't tell you about his power for a long time, never much of a subject considering how little involved quirks were in your life at all. your father was quirkless, and your mother had a telepathic quirk. which leads to you having a quirk that with a touch, could soothe the brain. reset mode.

it was terrible, at least that's what he wanted to think. each time touya would freak out, go on a blabber about his dad, or how natsuo didn't listen.

a tap on the hand would make his brain just, stop. he could move freely absolutely, just to form a thought was difficult. it was so quiet in his head, and for a moment, everything felt okay.

soon, he never even needed it. time with you, was time with you. he did not need to speak about the terrors at home because he simply was too indulged with how your day went, the work you had to do with your dad, or how you were scared of growing up.

“i’m going to be a philosopher, learn about the bullshit world we live in and why we do the things we do. sounds fun doesn't it?”

it's a topic that grew larger. the day he told you about his power, you told him what your dreams were. time went on, and the more he hurt himself, the more you noticed. the more you’d talk about it.

silence rang in his head as flame consumed him, the same silent buzz raged on his skin.

“touya.” when he blinks, the clinic your mother worked at sat before the car. it's worn down over time for sure, but the small trinkets still sat on the window sill. “what if she blows up at me?” he turns to natsuo, his eyes feel strained. “you’ll be fine, and if she launches anything she can get her hands on at you, you have to find them.”

he swallowed down the knot in his throat, pushing the car door open, placing his hand on handle like to open the clinics. natsuo gives a loving shove, and he decides to straighten his shoulders.

walking into the clinic, the familiar jingle rings above his head, and a woman who is not your mother sits at the front desk. she does however welcome with a warm smile, and the ends of his lips impulsively rise.

“hi, um could i possibly speak to the owner please?”

“is there an issue?”

��no ma’am.” the way he was speaking felt abnormal to him, he never even spoke this way with you. he just wanted it to work out. he didn’t care if he was thrown out, some sort of closure is all he wanted.

“alright, i'll call her up for you.”

in the next moment, she's already walking out, her smile fading slightly before rising again. he swears he's sweating like an animal. “touya.”

“hi ma’am.” again, his fallen smile raises. he tries to look her in the eye, at least her face but they are stuck to the floor.

“you know you don't have to speak to me with all that mannerism.” a light chuckle comes from her, and the weight off his shoulders slides off. he is able to look her in the eye, noticing how she's aged and how admirable she still is.

“well don't just stand there, come here boy.” her hands lightly gesture, and his boots shuffle against the floor. the gentle grip on his coat sends warmth through his hands, he’d forgotten his gloves at home. “your not mad?” a heavy cold breath leaves his lungs, and he doesn't feel suffocated for a moment.

“if i was, would they already be their way?” his hands loosened off her back, looked over to the woman at the front desk who set down the phone with the smuggest grin you’d ever see.

…

“okay please stop.”

“i can't help it natsuo!!” touya whined, he’d been waiting 35 minutes. you were up further north doing whatever it was you did in the mountains, he never really understood what jobs could be up there. your mother had offered hot chocolate, and it sat in the cup holder. he was too nervous to eat or drink.

“didn’t they say like you'd never become enemies or something?” natsuo picks the warm cup up out of the cup holder, sipping on it, and smacks his lips. “that's good as shit.”

“it doesn't matter, that was before everything you know?” his hands dug into his coat pocket, scuffling out the photograph he had crumpled. “maybe they're not as forgiving anymore, and they're on their way to slap the shit out of me.”

“they did that once too.” natsuo butts in the middle of another gulp.

“okay now you need to stop.” with a grumble, he snatches the picture back, clumping it into his pocket again.

through the clinic window, the girl from the desk points, and the rumbling starts becoming louder and louder from the distance.

“get your girl kind of moment i guess.” natsuo grins, going to nudge him in the side, but hits nothing. he was already rushing out of the car.

standing with the sunlight beaming through the clouds, he can't see you standing there, but the car door swung open, the sound of your engine. the cloud must have toppled over the sun quickly, considering your face starts coming into view. you look slightly deranged, panting like you've been running. he could chuckle at you. you still have an unshakeable determination.

when your feet begin to move toward him, he is already tensing his face. however, instead of the slap that he would have hardly been able to feel, he is slightly winded.

your arms shoving around him, and the scratchy sound of your jacket doesn’t bother him this time.

“you're a fucking idiot!” he’s taken aback when your hands push at his chest from the embrace you were just in.

“11 years too long. i shouldn't have had to find out over a stupid broadcast- over the fucking radio! i was with my dad and you said your name-!”

his arms swayed limply at his sides. “i’m sorry i-“

your fingers push back the hair blowing into your face, swallowing down the lump in your throat. “i know you are, and it’s okay.”

when touya spent his years alone. it taught him to neglect everyone around him. the words “sorry” had never been a part of him in the years rage lived in him. unless he’d accidentally thrown a ball at you too hard or made too cruel of a joke, that's the only time he’d ever found himself saying the words.

empathy only came naturally to the people who deserved it

waving from the other car door, natsuo stands waving gently. “hi natsuo.” you chuckle, and his eyes are squinted from the breeze. “been a minute huh?”

...

“you know i get it if you don't want to talk to me right?” touya shuffled through the trunk of your car, pulling a pair of tennis shoes out.

“that's not how i feel.” he kneels, unzipping your mountain boots and slipping them off. “i was upset i never tried to do anything about what you had always told me.” he looks up for a moment, your gaze lingered on his hands, he goes back to slipping on the sneakers.

“that's not your fault.”

“you know things may have turned out differently though.” he sighs, slipping off the ledge following his hands underneath your shoulders. “well, there is nothing we can do now. feel alright?”

“feels fine, thank you touya.”

he nods with a folded smile. “so the park?” he asks, tilting his head slightly and crossing his arms. “yup, lets go.” your nose scrunches at him, and he lets a sarcastic scoff out as he lets his foot hit the back of your knee.

a scoff then comes from you, your foot also hitting at the back of his. “what, you going to race me? i think you need some oil there old man”

in this moment, blood pumps through his veins with oxygen, and everything explodes and combines, he is working again. it feels he has crawled out of the dirt and bloomed. “its a block, i'll race you, and i'll win.”

“ohh okay, keep up then.” and watching your feet begin off the concrete. “hey! we could have at least had a countdown!” and he begins to run after you. your laughs run through his head, making his surroundings on the gray day brighter. a child-like filter on the world.

he does wear down rather quickly, but he expected it. he knew the truth.

watching as you roll onto the grass entrance of the park, screaming out in victory, he dives straight beside you. “i went so easy on you!”

“yeah right! considering the look on your face-” he had worked himself out for you, hadn't he? the weak smile, but the tender winces leaving his chuckles told you something else.

“you were struggling-!” an awkward laugh bubbled from your throat, and he lay sprawled on the grass with his eyes shut.

there at that moment, no matter if he had begun to heal, there was no fuel left in him. touya was dying.

“we should do some stuff, we're already here. we can go to the beach next.” staring up into the sky, your mind blends past and present, everything felt so silent when touya was gone. laying in the sun during the summer felt uncomfortable like the sun was destroying your skin and making everything troublesome. each year you'd waste away waiting for the winter for things to be okay.

“the sun is setting, maybe tomorrow? when you can be more comfortable.” touya turns his head, looking over at you. “no, today. the beach is pretty when the moonlight hits it anyway, but first, the swings.”

there at that moment, you knew, touya was dying. the sun was falling to dusk, and each time his time would be cut shorter, like the winters of the cruel world. letting the fallen smile rise again, you tug at his hand, pulling him up til he can follow you up to the swings that he had well outgrown. there was no reason to dwell on the fate everybody would find.

touya digs his hands into his pockets, sitting on the seat of the swing. it sits rather snug, but he lets his feet swing. “it's curfew by now, the parents of this neighbor aren't gonna like us very much.”

“i don't live here anymore.” you shrug.

“i do.” he chuckles. “and everything reminds me of–everything you know.”

“well, let's not get sappy. i'll push you.” shifting off your swing, your hands push at his back, giving him some motion to swing back and forth.

his head gets buzzy.

there's nothing to think about but the stars fading into the sky, and the cherished street lights that illuminate the slides. there was no thought, but like never before, the shush from your lips plays in his head like he himself is doing it.

the feeling of his body rocking back and forth goes on till there is no velocity left.

looking up, the sky has gone dark from its gray closure. “you’ve got to stop doing that y/n!!” you snort, mockingly quietly from your swing. “i wanna go to the beach, so stop staring and come back to reality.”

“i heard you that time-” he blinks, standing from the swing, it hits him in the back of the leg. he doesn't react however, just silently reaching back to stop it.

“we’ll walk?”

“yeah, why not.”

…

watching from the concrete ledge of the beach, the moonlight shines down upon the water. the tide swallows the sand, and you stand beyond letting it wash on your knees. it was too cold for touya, it felt empty again, that he couldn't stand beside you like he would, or go swimming in the middle of winter. the water almost speaks to you, splashes from afar confusing and replacing it with lost memories.

but in his mind, it is almost a blessing that he could watch you live one more time. a person of peace who found no need. he tries to wipe the feeling of nostalgia from his mind.

you run up, panting slightly from the cold. you sit on the ledge with him.

“it’s so nice, you sure you can’t go skim it?”

“could send my body into shock, rather not end it now.” he chuckles, turning his head, taking a breath, about to speak before he stops. “-you know, i want to live. i've always wanted to live.” he lets the air stuck in his lungs release, a cool cloud coming with it.

“we're all going to die anyway.” your mind fixates again on the truth.

“quote, “your body won't hold up much longer.” i guess, but i won't be kicking it anytime soon.” his hand pushes at your back.

“go, i had a good view.”

“your vile touya.”

“not like that, you're just pretty.” a small scrunch comes to his eye, his hand still patting you on.

“i might swim, who knows.” and the breeze starts to pick up. it's going to snow. you take a couple of steps before you nervously dig your foot into the ground.

“y/n?” he calls. his hands press the ledge, but he doesn't slide off, just watches as you approach.

“touya.” the crack in your voice sends his body up. “what is it?”

“i just don’t wanna lose you all over again. i can't.” his hands reach for you. his rough palms skim continuously rubbing at the side of your face. “shh, nono. don't be silly. when has my dumbass ever gone out and not come back?”

his thumbs start at the tears pinching at your eyes. it feels like years of pent-up emotion spilling from your words and from your eyes. possibly pushed underwater to choke on the salt of the sea, every landscape you shared with him had shoved its pollution into your lungs.

“the seasons dry touya.”

“please don't cry.”

his arms pull you to his chest, each shake of your body making him flinch, biting down on the flesh of his cheek. “you cold? come on, let's put your shoes back on. you've never jumped in that water and you know you won't.”

pulling from his chest, his sleeves wipe at the drying streams. he chuckles at the cold-induced redness on the pout of your lips. “you’re a dick touya.”

turning you both around, he rolls his eyes. “maybe, but i try my best to be nice to you. now sit before you get sick.” he kneels, sliding your socks on, and then your shoes. “it's gonna snow, we should go.” you sniffle, looking up to the gray hoard of clouds fogging in.

“we should, your set. let's go.” again, he slides you off from beneath your shoulders. somehow you've forgotten how habit it was for him. standing under the fire pole at the park to catch you, or helping you jump over the neighborhood walls. touya was made “evil.”

…

snowfalls. the street light outside his home illuminated its speed. by morning a light coat will rest upon the ground, the mountains covered with a tighter hug.

“those pants don't look like they are drying, i could go up and get something from fuyumi-”

“nono, i couldn't.” you shake your head, and he shakes his. “nono, you can just give it back the next time you see me. sit on the couch inside and i'll deal with it.”

“thank you touya.”

he clicks his tongue, shrugging as he pushes the door open for you. “don't have to thank me, i'd rather you not freeze.”

he brings down a pair of fleece cargos, handing them to you. “she said she doesn't even use them, bring em back whenever, or not.”

“well i can't put them on if you're staring.” he raises his brows, spinning around. “sorry.”

struggling to get the damp pants off your knees, you grunt. “i can help by the way, no peeking i promise.”

“fine, pull.” he turns around, a hand still on his eyes all while gripping the end of the pants and tugging them off, then turning back around.

“alright, heading out.” you stand off the couch and reach to hug him. his chin sits on your shoulder.

you both know it feels like you’ve shrunk, you cannot even feel the roughness against your cheek, maybe in some better place, where a father didn't choose power and heir, there could have been more time. your lips pushing against his cheek, the wrap of the embrace unraveling. “bye touya.” and his head goes fuzzy.

…

in the morning, the gray cast filled the sky once again, yet rain turned the snow to mush.

when the phone rings, you almost assume touya got your number from your mother. you pick up the number without a second thought. “hello?”

you expected the arrogant rasp, and your heart pounds a couple of beats quicker. the voice makes you set down the clothing you were folding. “natsuo? what's up?”

“you live there? i live two houses down! if you want, we could go and swim at the beach!

“it's the middle of the winter.”

“so?!”

"natsuo? come on whats up? is everything alright?"

“touya died. he’s dead.”

all over again, you'll stand before the same eyes, shared by the blood of a man you cannot bear. you won't look back to that house, you won't speak to enji or rei. the eyes of his siblings will haunt you, no matter blue or gray. summers and winters, the skies' beauty will be hidden from your eyes.

your lungs are on fire, your body hitting the concrete with each step sending blaze through your nerves till you've made it. soaked down in water, the fleece pants in one hand.

natsuo stands with a photograph in his hand.

"i dont know what happened."

masterlist.

#✧˚ · . writing #✧˚ · . mha works #touya todoroki #todoroki dabi #dabi todoroki #todoroki touya #my hero academia #mha #mha touya #mha dabi #boku no hero academia

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