#hope this helps babey

[isolctions]

how do you cut posts ?

hey friend — i’m mobile, so pls forgive me for a lack of links / any misspellings.

if you currently have legacy editor & you are reblogging from another legacy editor blog, you can use new xkit’s Editable Reblogs.

if you currently have legacy editor & are reblogging from a beta editor blog, you can use Editable Reblogs to cut your posts — but keep in mind that the beta editor person may not be able to cut yours / it may post the previous reply in your reblog. in that case, you have to also use xkit rewritten’s Trim Posts by saving the post to your drafts & trimming the reply above it. i personally use this method when rping with beta editor blogs as a legacy blogger, and so far it has worked without fucking up any posts.

if you currently have beta editor & are reblogging from a beta editor blog, xkit rewritten’s Trim Posts should work without any extra steps.

if any of my mutuals are smarter than me abt this & have any corrections to make / any other tips to chime in, pls do so lololol

[smokbeast]

finally..unhinged sun real…

[waddles-ex-machina]

Hiiii! So, I just started interacting with the fandom I realized there's a lot of Johanna x Kaisa shippers (Sketchbook is the name ship?), and I wanted to know what's the appeal of the ship cus it never occurred to me to ship them lmao

Anyway, all in good faith! Thank you if you answer it, but it's fine if you don't!

Hello! Welcome to the fandom!

That’s a totally fair question, I’ve been a sketchbook shipper for years so to be honest shipping them is just second nature to me now, but let me uhhh try and remember some of my (and the rest of the fandom’s) reasoning. gonna put this under a cut bc it got kind of long I’m sorry 😭

Soo my favourite reason and the thing I never shut up about is that Johanna and Kaisa fulfill VASTLY different roles in Hilda’s life and in the show itself - Johanna is coded to be this very safe stable character for Hilda who isn't all that into her adventures (I know she breaks out of this image later in the show, but it’s still a big part of her character. like. for the most part she just wants some peace at home with a cup of tea please) and Kaisa is there specifically to enable Hilda’s adventures and point her at the dangerous thing. and character dynamic-wise, this is just. very funny. POV you’re a single mother just trying to see her child to the next birthday and the weird lady at the library keeps giving her books that can raise the dead. they’re at such odds by design that it sets up a ton of potential for how they could start off on the wrong foot (enemies to lovers babeyy) or have to try and meet each-other in the middle. and they’re both involved enough in Hilda’s life that it really feels like only a matter of time til they get thrown together by one of Hilda’s shenanigans

also, design and personality-wise they have an “opposites attract” kind of vibe I think? for instance Johanna is outwardly very friendly and a bit of a people-pleaser, but takes absolutely no shit when Hilda is in danger, and Kaisa puts up this dark mysterious persona, but deep down is quite insecure and anxious (and also more caring than she lets on - you can tell she’s also got a bit of a soft spot for Hilda when the kid isn’t actively trying to steal swords) so it’s fun to imagine how Johanna and Kaisa’s personalities could play off each-other when they have such different outward appearances but are more similar deep-down.

Theres also some fun angst reasons off the top of my head:

Johanna has had absolutely nothing but bad experiences with magic and Kaisa is an actual witch, and is partially responsible for some of those experiences (tide mice, etc). you can spin like 1 million scenarios out of this and people already have and it's great bdhsgdjh

Johanna has spent most of her life being abandoned by the people she trusts (her parents, Anders) and Kaisa has been shown to (unwillingly) shut people out and withdraw for fear of not being good enough. You could read them as both having difficulty trusting and maybe being able to help eachother through their insecurities together

to steal a very good point I saw @the-hilda-librarians-wife make a while ago, they’re both outcasts in their respective communities - Johanna struggles to fit in with the other parents and isn’t shown really having any friends in the show, and Kaisa gave up being a ‘proper’ witch to be the keeper of the books, and the other witches clearly look down on her as a result. They lead vastly different lives, but do have similarities that they could connect over and support each-other through.

ALSO - now we know Johanna is also magical and lost a part of herself from having her memory wiped - there is that potential for them to find the things that they’ve been missing in eachother. Kaisa deals with all kinds of magic shenanigans as her day job and could arguably do with some peace and someone to lean on, but she isn’t shy about magic/danger/any other weirdness. Johanna has an adventurous side that was repressed along with her childhood memories for years that still feels very distant to her. They could help bring these things out in each-other and bring a bit of balance to each-other’s lives.

And, coming back to what I said about them having different roles in the show, it’s just very fun to picture them as a co-parenting duo for Hilda. normal mom & chaotic mom. Hilda would be absolutely unstoppable

Finally, imo Kaisa is absolutely a lesbian (years ago I made a joke post on here saying smth like “did the Hilda team know they were making a wlw icon here” and someone from the team replied with “yes” JDKHSJ) and I’ve been in the fandom long enough to know the effect that Johanna has on those, I rest my case 😌

I hope that explains it kind of!! also if anyone else has any other points to make for why they like the ship feel free to add on!!

[shima-draws]

Grips my shirt and tears it apart so that all the buttons go flying and SCREAMS I love Law and Cora so much what the FUCK!!!!

[tsuchinokoroyale]

If he’s lookin for some thrills, ya hit him with the frills 🐠

[indigopoptart]

Quick Post! A comm i did for a friend! @chocolix76

ft some other variants (and the og scrapped😭)

im glad u like it😭 tqm bro!!

[sapphic-luthor]

Happy Sunday! You mentioned the other week you really like podcasts - any you would recommend? I’m trying to get into some but I never seem to be able to find any I like. They definitely seem like they’d be good company for walks. Hope your week ahead is sunny and full of good vibes! - SMA

HELLO i have just had the most hellish two weeks of my life so i lost last weeks message in a brain black hole so sorry sorry!! but life has righted itself again and all is well and re: podcasts i’m honestly a big Critical Role fan and it is a huge, huge, undertaking but i do recommend giving it a quick try just in case (start w campaign 2)

my other podcasts are honestly not ones i usually recommend to people because they’re like.., maybe objectively not interesting to most people but

Lingthusiasm is a great fun linguistics podcast w one of my favourite linguists

The History of English is a little dry but contains SO MUCH COOL INFO about language construction and history and general history of eurasia

My Dad Wrote A Porno is a classic and truly insane comedy podcast that, no matter what you think you will get going into it is even better than you can imagine

Candlelit Tales is a brother-sister duo who tells Irish mythology stories while their musician friend freestyles music behind to add to the vibes and it’s just . they’re real good.

[gentlefxlk]

Who gives justice to those who are oppressed, and food to those who hunger.

The Lord sets the prisoners free; the Lord opens the eyes of the blind; * the Lord lifts up those who are bowed down;

The Lord loves the righteous; the Lord cares for the stranger; he sustains the orphan and widow, but frustrates the way of the wicked.

— psalm 146:6-8

[jackalhadrurusluvr]

crossing my fingers and just hoping all the symptoms of ocd i have are just the autism instead

[cowboyishbabe]

Why is it so cold in here????????

[wienervulture]

i thought i banished my catholic guilt but it’s taken me this long to potentially refer to myself as an atheist

[angelbarelywrites]

♡ slashers scenarios | let’s get kinky

♡ fandoms; Halloween, Texas Chainsaw Massacre (original + 2006), House of Wax, The Boy, Dead by Daylight, slashers (general)

♡ characters; Micheal Myers, Thomas Hewitt, Bubba Sawyer, Vincent Sinclair, Brahms Heelshire

♡ reader; gender neutral

♡cw; graphic sexual content, kink content

♡notes; pretty much just kink lists babey

oh boy i hope this doesn’t reveal anything about me

also happy easter lol

•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•

Micheal Myers

> Knifeplay and breathplay are a given with this one

> He likes to be in complete control

> And a hand around the throat or a blade ghosting the skin definitely help him achieve that

> He also loves both tying you up and being tied up, surprisingly

> Letting you ride him while he’s tied to the bed is just about the only way you’ll get the man to relinquish any of that control

> And even then he makes sure you know he’s still the boss- if you’re too much of a brat he’s slipping the restraints and fucking you so hard you walk funny after

> He loves marking you up, mostly through biting

> And he likes to keep the mask on- even if he’s at a point where he rarely wears it around you

> He’ll quietly degrade you if you’re into that- you have to earn praise though

> But if you praise him you may actually be able to fluster him for once

Thomas Hewitt

> Breeding kink breeding kink breeding kink you can’t convince me otherwise

> He loves pinning you down into a mating press and watching your face as he fills you

> He’s so rough and overwhelming

> He likes to lick away your tears when it’s just too much

>And sometimes he’ll keep you pinned there well after, keeping himself inside.

> He’d let you call him daddy- and god does he get into it, but he’d be too shy to suggest anything like that himself

> He loves praise and he loves letting you know how good you feel

> Not usually verbally, but he’ll growl and moan and purr shamelessly

> He’s the king of oral, he’s like a man starved and you’ll end up overstimulated 9 out of 10 times

> And he loves when you reciprocate, especially if you don’t mind him fucking your mouth

Bubba Sawyer

> He’s a bit vanilla, not having much experience or knowledge beyond sex for procreation.

> Insert Drayton’s “sex or the saw” quote here lol

> But he’ll try anything for you at least once, he’s so eager to please.

> Most notably he makes a wonderful little submissive

> Whether you want him to bottom or just power bottom yourself, he loves being used to make you feel good

> He enjoys any and all praise

> He’s rather insecure, so he loves compliments on his appearance especially

> If you call him a pretty boy he melts

> 100 percent would love if you called yourself mommy/daddy/any other dom titles

> He loves when you sit on his face more than anything else

Vincent Sinclair

> The softest dom. He wants to take care of you around the clock, but especially in bed

> He’s a service top- it’s all for you. So much more concerned with you getting off than even being touched.

> He’s into wax play (Because it’s funny but also bc it’s underrated)

> And he likes to restrain you so he can worship you completely uninterrupted

> He’s not afraid of using toys, especially when you’re all tied up and at his mercy

> He loves taking pictures of you as well

> At first he claims it’s for reference but you know better, baby has a documentation kink

> He loves just watching too

> Trying to keep control while you touch yourself and moan his name is his favorite pastime

Brahms Heelshire

> Huge brat in need of taming

> Only a switch in the technical sense- he’ll top if you beg/bribe/pester him enough. He’s just lazy tbh

> Love love loves being both degraded and praised

> “filthy little boy” “pretty little slut” etc

> Prefers calling you mommy/daddy but can work with master

> And he’ll be your puppy if you want him to be

> He wears a cute collar and leash and lets you yank on it while you make him fuck you

> He loves when you edge him too

> Until he’s nearly in tears and whining and begging you to let him cum

> If you have boobs he’s obsessed with them

> And even if you don’t he’ll give the area lots of attention

[vhaos-chaotic-writing]

can i resquets Yandere Tfa Optimus, Prowl, Blurr and Jazz x cybertronian reader who is a motherly figure to Sari so much so that she sees Sari as if she were her Sparkling also that she almost got into a fight with Sentinel for insulting Sari

Ou yeaaa, we fighting that chin-ass Sentinel to protect the babey (Sari)!!! ᕦ(òwóˇ)ᕤ

Yandere!TFA Optimus Prime, Prowl, Blurr & Jazz x Cybertronian!Fem!Reader who is a motherly figure to Sari (HCs)

WARNINGS: Yandere behaviour. Reader is female leaning, Cybertronian and an Autobot. Reader gets referred as Mom and takes a motherly role. Mentions of threatening, hurting or killing someone (all towards Sentinel Prime)

Optimus Prime

Whenever Optimus gets to see you interacting with Sari, he thanks Primus for be allowed to witness such precious sight. Sari has grown to like you so much, going first to you to pass time whenever you are free and you are more than happy to pass time with her.

No matter how much Bee whines that you always steal Sari's attention and time, the girl always arguments back a "I want to pass time with my mom!", making you chuckle and Optimus can't help but hope Sari gets to see him as the fatherly figure (or at least the 2nd, sorry Isaac Sumdac...)

Loves how you view Sari as a sparkling and take care of her, always making sure she is well taken care of, safe and sound, and so on.

And he has to be the one to physically hold you back whenever Sentinel Prime is around making his uncalled for comments about humans and Sari, specially.

"Call my girl a 'mucky organic' and I'll be the one to send you to the well of the All Spark!" You warn the taller mech to then turn around and walk away. Sentinel was this close to grab your shoulder to make you stay so he could reprend you (how dare you speak to him like that?!). But before he can grab you, his wrist is grabbed by another servo.

Optimus Prime always tries to remain civil with Sentinel, and sometimes he gives into the arguments the other mech always does for the sake of trying to humilliate Optimus or just get on his nerves... but that moment was different.

TFA Optimus would be a protective, possessive leaning yandere.

The shadow casted on his faceplate and how his optics shine dangerously as he stares with warning makes Sentinel actually step back and then leave.

Prowl

Other bots joke that Prowl is your personal shadow as he tends to follow you like a 'lost puppy' when you are around - which is funny, in your optics he is acting more like a guard dog.

Everything you do fascinates him - even your motherly nature around Sari.

TFA Prowl would be a stalker, worshipping yandere - the type of yandere that always follows his beloved one in silence and taking everything about them.

Just small things, of course! Like a piece of your armour that fell when you were fighting with a decepticon, a note you wrote to remind yourself of something and when you no longer needed it, and so on...

Maybe a photo or two while cuddling Sari... oh, you're so precious.

But of course - just as there are so many bots and organics that don't see the true beauty on things, like nature, there are bots that don't see the beauty in you and your maternal love for the young girl.

Like Sentinel Prime.

Prowl once witnessed you discussing loudly with the other bigger bot, you looked so angry as you left, carrying Sari in your arms.

Sentinel was going to go after you when a shuriken passed just by the side of his helm, doing a small cut on his cheekplate.

And when the Prime turned around to yell at whoever threw that shuriken, he was met with Prowl, the upper side of his frame covered by the shadow of a hallway... something in Sentinel said to not move or yell back, as after a couple of moments, the Cyber-ninja blends with the shadows, leaving a silent threat in the air.

No one will disturb your beauty as long as he is around.

Blurr

We got a yapper (Blurr) x listener (You) dynamic here, definitely.

TFA Blurr is an obsessive yandere, from helm to pedes, and said obsessiveness also leans onto a worshipping side.

This mech actually shuts his mouth the moment you introduce yourself to him and remains silent as long as you speak.

Your voice is like the most refined energon done on Cybertron. And even better, even sweeter.

He broke code a few times and visited you while he was on earth (let's, before he got stuck with Skywarp and Thundercracker.)

Loves to hear you speak, and the moment you brought up your love for Sari, how you care so much for her and being with her always makes you laugh and feel happy... oh, such a precious sight Blurr replays over and over again in his mind when he is thinking about you.

He is definitely already planning out everything: When the war is over and the decepticons are brought down, he is going to ask your servo in marriage (as humans say), become your conjux endura, have as many sparklings as you want with him - he is already thinking on their designations and he can't wait to share them with you!

You are perfect! You are perfect you are perfect oh my Primus you are perfect youaresoperfectforhimitmakeshissparkbeatsoquicklyitmightkillhimhelovesyouhelovesyouhelovesyou

Of course - the moment you share with him about how once Sentinel Prime said something rather rude about Sari... Blurr feels his spark break in half at how you looked.

You looked angry, hurt that someone said something about the girl you saw as your own sparkling.

No, no, no - please, smile again, keep talking about how Sari brings you happiness or - or tell Blurr about whatever makes you happy. He wishes to listen, he needs to listen to your happiness - he doesn't wish to see you angry or hurt, pleasepleaseplease

In that little moment, Blurr promises to make Sentinel Prime regret ever open his mouth. He will make sure that mech becomes complete silent, as Blurr only wishes to hear you. Only you.

Jazz

TFA Jazz gives me the vibes of a stalker, self-aware yandere that slowlys transitions into delusion.

It would have been a slow burn from his part to fall in love (and obsess) with you, but it was the interactions he saw of you with Sari that made his spark develop those feelings.

He loved those moments where he got to see you carrying the girl with your arms, and the strong bond you two shared.

When Sari told you that time Jazz got scared at her when she just did a 'Oowa-booga!' scare at the mech, you laughed with such joy, and Jazz felt his spark explode inside his chestplate.

Oh, his beautiful conjux and his sparkling are so adorable!

... oh wait, you two are not together (yet).

Sentinel Prime has learned to keep his mouth shut and keep his own thoughts to himself whenever you are around, either if Jazz is also there or not.

Last time he called you a 'bot with too much organic germs' and Sari a 'nasty, organic pet', aside that he nearly got his aft kicked by you, and...

He swears Jazz nearly shoot him on the helm when they were chasing after a decepticon that decided to attack them nearby the forest. He would have yelled at Jazz... if it wasn't for that murderous gleam he got to see through the mech's visor.

TFA Jazz is such a fiiine mech, I got my eyes on him now. ♪(´▽｀) Finally done! Hope you all like it! Vhaos out!

[ghosts-bandwagon]

headcanons of the bois+ könig with a reader who is quite young to be at the 141, but they soon realize that they're not as innocent as they look like? i hope this is an appropiate request : )

Ooh! We love a badass 😭❤️ (I wasn’t sure if this was meant to be platonic or romantic but I tried to make it so it can be read as either)

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley:

Honestly thoroughly impressed

You clicked instantly with Gaz and Soap, and that didn’t exactly fill him with confidence

He’d passed you off as a young and reckless kid, he wasn’t exactly eager to have you in his squad but who’s he to argue orders

(That’s a lie, he voiced his concerns to Price who told him to trust you)

But then he saw you on the field, focused, precise, deadly, and absolutely lethal if you found your back against the wall

After you seeing you take down a group of men at least twice your size and walk away relatively unscathed, he decided to take you under his wing

He’d train with you constantly, on the mats, in the range, in the gym and you’d take his lessons in stride, he’s not doing it to hone you into an even deadlier weapon

He’s sharpening your skills so you can come back to him in one piece

John ‘Soap’ MacTavish:

When you were first introduced to the team, he had his reservations but took it upon himself to protect you, no matter what

Especially after you so happily laughed at his jokes

So when you were shipped out together and you provided the most excellent cover fire he’s ever experienced, he’s heavily rethinking his initial judgement of you

He’s reconsidering it even more when he saw you single-handedly cleared the floor while supporting him on your shoulder

“Steamin’ Jesus, didn’t see that comin’” not only was he referring to the surprise attach, but to the lethal force you used to handle the situation

“That why you got me, Soap, I’ve got you.” You beamed up at him, and his heart melted.

Bad ass or not, he still vowed to protect you.

John Price:

He’s not as surprised as the rest of them, he read through your file, saw your accomplishments in the academy

He wasn’t as surprised but his expectations were certainly high, that didn’t mean he didn’t feel any less obligated to keep you safe

Still, when you came at your opponents with deadly accuracy and precision he’s only ever seen from Ghost, he’s a little aghast, definitely not in a bad way though

He’s 100% impressed, his expectations were exceeded but now he had a different reason to worry about you

So to help you stay as safe as possible, he paired you with Ghost to strengthen your training, he doesn’t want you to hurt yourself needlessly

Kyle ‘Gaz’ Gerrick:

Absolutely blindsided

If you look babey, and you sound babey, then you are babey

So when Price paired you with him, he definitely had his reservations

But seeing you in action was a completely different story. He honestly struggled to believe that he was watching the same person he’d just had coffee with this morning

You’re telling me this lethal one person army was sharing memes and TikTok’s with him this morning??? Unreal.

At the same time, he’s pretty young looking himself and can relate to being judged because of that. So he feels bad for second guessing your strength

He’s definitely asking you for pointers when you get back to base

König:

Not surprised but still a little surprised, he knows firsthand that appearances aren’t always what they seem, so when he was told you were a force to be reckoned with, he believed it. But still quietly promised himself to keep both eyes on you.

So when you were shipped out together, he was a little too focused on trying to protect you that he left himself open to injury

And then he saw it

He saw every ounce of your prowess. You were on a warpath, doing everything possible, single-handedly, to clear the area so the two of you could leave. You came back to him, breathless, and enchanting. You stretched your arm out to him, keeping an eye over your shoulder,

“Come on, big guy, let’s get you up.”

And here I- agh- thought I’d be protecting you.” He teased, groaning as he accepted your hand and helped himself up. You braced yourself as you pulled him upright,

“Maybe next time, Köni. For now, I’ve got you.” You laughed, flashing him a bright smile. Next time, he’d have your back. He swears it.

[diagonal-queen]

HELLO!! i keep requesting them sotty im obsessed but what about hunting dogs with a s/o who has a child😅😅i got silly again

Hunting Dogs with your child

♡ pairing: Fukuchi Ouchi, Jouno Saigiku, Tecchou Suehiro, Teruko Okura (platonic), Tachihara Michizou x gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: How do these goofballs fare as stepdads? (or, in Teruko's case, fun auntie?)

♡ cw: Swearing, unofficial stepfathering, unrealistically good stepfathering, reader's ex situation is not established but it's assumed that their baby momma/daddy is not in the picture (Tachihara), mentions of violence

note: I just haven't written anything in ages, and for that I apologise. Wow, being in university is time consuming! I've had block for months and it's been an absolute pain in the arse but I'm back babey! Keep your requests coming anon- I am the Hunting Dogs whisperer and I will write them till I die. Apologies for errors and I hope you enjoy x

Fukuchi:

My dude is so so so enthusiastic. You mean to tell him that he gets a beautiful loving partner AND a new little guy to hang out with?? Sign him tf up

This man buys your kid so many presents it's genuinely concerning. Your child is spoilt to hell and back by Fukuchi. You need to discourage him from this behaviour STAT

He constantly uses dad words like 'buddy' and 'pal' and 'kiddo' to refer to your kid and they eventually start responding to these nicknames lol

He would totally also do dad stances and just embrace the fatherly aura that is slowly overtaking him day by day (bro starts falling asleep on the couch while the game's on at 9pm)

He's actually surprisingly gentle with your child. If they cry he'll pick them up and comfort them very well. He's like a whole different person when your kid is scared or sad- it's the cutest thing ever

If your child ever gets him a Fathers' Day present he'll probably cry like old man tears of joy. In fact if your child ever does anything nice for him he'll be incredibly touched. Kinda reminds him what he's doing his job for :')

Tells your child great exaggerated (CHILD FRIENDLY) stories about his heroic achievements as a soldier before bed. It's genuinely super cute you guys

If the kid ever runs up to him in excitement when he arrives home in the evening he returns the energy and is like 'omg there they are! that's my kiddo! how have you been??' and picks them up and AUGH they're so cute

Just....🥺🥺

Jouno:

Your child is probably scared of him at first. Within their first meeting he probably makes them cry.

Sorry y'all 😭 but he doesn't exactly come off as much of a teddy bear...and nor does he really act like one with anyone else other than you in private

Jouno just isn't good with kids. Not in the sense that he's scared of them but that he doesn't really know how to interact with them without being intimidating or otherwise just detached

But he really loves you, and he wants to be a good parental figure to your kid, so he tries to warm them up to him by getting them a gift. That probably helps- he might not know much about kids but he's right to assume that they fucking love receiving gifts

Whatever your child's hobbies/interests are, Jouno genuinely does try to connect with them over it, and after a while it does work.

Soon enough your child and Jouno are inseparable and your child is spewing sadistic military rhetoric and oh dear god you've made a terrible mistake introducing the two of them

Yeah, Jouno probably teaches your kid all KINDS of horrible things. He will tell your child stories about times he's tortured suspects, or slaughtered gangs, and just stuff that is not family friendly. You have to nip that behaviour in the bud or else...

He's generally pretty good at taking care of your child, but like, if your kid cried because they were scared there was a monster under the bed, Jouno would probably be like "Yeah. There is. Good luck." and then turn off the lights and leave 💀

Just give him time. He'll learn how to be an emotionally available parent at SOME point

Tecchou:

He's not the step dad. He's the dad that stepped up

Tecchou is definitely very aloof and awkward around your child- like, he knows how to interact with you, but children are different. Children are frightening. And they are his biggest fear maybe

In spite of this, he is fiercely protective of your kid. He will make sure that child is as safe and calm as possible at all times, and he certainly prefers to show that he cares through actions rather than words.

He usually wouldn't initiate physical contact with your child but if they hugged him he would hug back, if they gave him a hi-five he would do it back, etc etc. he will never let your kid down

If your child likes make belief, you can bet you'd walk into a room and find your kid all dressed up, off their rocker in full theatre mode, while Tecchou is sitting on the floor, also dressed up, but looking more depressed than ever before

Save him from your baby. They are taking YEARS off his life

He probably accidentally sends your kid to hospital at some point because he cooked for them. Damnit Tecchou, how don't you realise that a child's stomach wouldn't be able to handle a combination of chocolate and beef

It's okay though, he does learn from this. Plus, he takes care of your child and buys them presents and hangs out with them until they're better <3

He might not join your child in the ball pit, but he would watch them swim around in there with the softest, faintest, most affectionate smile on his face. And that is all that matters folks

Teruko (platonic):

The funnest, meanest, coolest auntie ever

Teruko will lead your child down a dreadful path. Limit their visits to holidays and birthdays for your own sake and the sake of your young one

She's really more than happy to negatively influence look after your child if you need her to though, and they love her because she's super chill and lets them get away with all kinds of things (that aren't violent crimes against humanity)

Your parent says one cookie after dinner? Screw it, have six. I won't tell if you won't. - Teruko, probably

She uses her ability to entertain your kid sometimes- usually she'll decrease her age so she can join them in things like building pillow forts and playing on jungle gyms

I'm just picturing them playing at the park and some concerned parent coming up to them asking where their guardian is and Teruko just fucking transforms into a grown woman on the spot and goes 'WHO'S ASKING' 😭

Teruko is a super cool fun aunt. But she is very wise, and she really will give your kid good life advice on occasion.

She'll also cheer them up when they're feeling down, and if they're feeling scared she helps them step out of their comfort zones and confront their fears (in a safe way!!)

If your kid is like, getting picked on at school or something, Teruko will nag you to phone their school about it. If you don't, she does. If they don't do anything about it, she does. Bottom line is NOBODY fucks with your kid when Teruko is around

I guess technically she really is scary dog privilege lmao

Tachihara:

Help he's so nervous at first? Tachihara this is a child, not a wise sage- you can be normal around them

He just wants to make a good impression on the child okay he's doing his best

But (obviously) your kid immediately loves him, and thinks he's the coolest guy ever, and wants to hang out with him all the time

Tachihara has a bit of a concern that the kid will think that he's trying to replace their other parent, which is fair, but it's unfounded because your child absolutely adores him and does not care about that at all

If your child ever calls him 'Dad' watch his soul fucking transcend to a new plane, he's so surprised and honoured that this beautiful person's child would consider him their parent

Your kid has Tachihara wrapped around their tiny finger. He will oblige them with anything- if you've got a toddler who likes uppies and piggybacks, say your prayers for Tachihara's upper arm and back muscles because he will carry them for hours

You really need him to stop leaving weaponry around the house, though- the absolute HEART ATTACK you had when you saw your precious baby carrying around an unloaded pistol

Also, Tachihara, babe, STOP SWEARING SO MUCH AROUND THE BABY. I CAN'T HAVE MY KID SAYING 'FUCK' TO STRANGERS - you, probably

Doesn't really ever talk about his job(s) with your kid, all they know is that he 'kills bad guys', and they think that's cool as fuck

He's not perfect, sure. But he is trying so hard to be The Perfect Parent™ and, more importantly, he loves your child to bits

taglist~ ♡ @gettinshiggywithit, @fyodorhatr, @flower-of-darkness, @bejeweledgirl, @kokoenjiandco, @pinkiipeachiikeen

of course, thank you to anon for this req!

[txttletale]

Also for the record when you accuse art of being ideologically bad, I do not assume you don't enjoy it as art, I assume you want the artist executed by firing squad in front of you, because you're a communist and that's what communists are like; hope this helps

thats right babey