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fredweesleyismyslut · 4 years ago

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No More Secrets - Tim Drake x reader

A/N: One of my many interests is reading comic books sometimes and in middle school I got really into the robins and batman, so this is me living out my fantasy of dating my favorite by writing Tim Drake fanfic haha. Anyways, twas also written at 12am like most of my writings nowadays because apparently I like writing when I’m running on 3 hours of sleep and 2 cups of coffee at night. So, before I ramble more I’m gonna stop here, so I hope you enjoy this and have a good whatever it is where you live/whenever you’re reading this and if it’s not good it’ll get better! Byeeeee!

Staring at the clock, it felt as if it was mocking you, ticking the seconds away as you waited for your boyfriend to show. Muttering under your breath you said to yourself, “Of course he’s a no show.” You had prepared dinner for him at home, it was your two year anniversary and you had a surprise for him. Sighing you ran your hand through your hair, looking at your phone the last time that Tim had texted you back, you texted one last time, Hey, babe. I’m gonna head to bed it’s getting late. Before he could text back or call you turned your phone off, done for the night, not wanting to be bothered. Tim Drake, your boyfriend, was somehow always busy and missed all your dates, and now he’s missed your anniversary. It wouldn’t have been a big deal if it wasn’t for the fact that, yet again, he’s missed more than half the dates you’ve ever been on. I mean you probably hang out with his brothers more than he hangs out with you. You can count more than once that Dick, his older brother, had come out and eaten dinner with you instead because you had made reservations and Tim couldn’t make it. Groaning you stretched, allowing the air to be released from your joints as you stood up and ignored the dishing, promising yourself you would wash them the next morning.

The next morning, you heard the doorbell ringing, someone was nonstop ringing the bell as you finally jolted from the bed, “I’m coming, I’m coming!” Opening the door, you questioned, “Why are you ringing the doorbell like a madman at 6am?!” Wiping the grogginess from your eyes, you focused, “Oh, Tim. Hey, what’s up?” You stood at the door, as you continued, “I thought it was the kids next door, they usually come over for breakfast since their mom leaves early.” He nodded as he shuffled his hands together, as he smiled softly, “Can I come in?” You nodded, moving aside, as he walked past you, “I’m sorry.” was the first thing that came out of his mouth as soon as he made it in, “I didn’t mean to ditch you last night, I was-” You cut him off quickly, eyes shooting holes into him, you swear if looks could kill...he’d already be dead. “Oh, let me guess, you were busy, just like every other time.” You scoffed softly, as you went over to get water, “Let me guess again, you bailed because last-minute your neighbor’s house burned down and you had to go save everyone?” Tim frowned softly, “Y/n, baby, I promise it’ll never happen again.” You rolled your eyes softly, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep Timmy.” His hand reached for yours as you quickly pulled away, as if his hand was made from fire, “Be honest with me Tim, are you just not interested anymore?” you moved to the far corner and crossed your arms over your chest as if protecting your heart from hurt, “In the two years we’ve been together I can count maybe three times that we’ve had a date where you didn’t bail last minute. I mean what is going on, did you just have fun playing with me?” Tim’s face turned into one of appalling, “I would never y/n, you know that.” “Do I? Honestly, at this point I don’t know whether I’m dating you or your brothers. I’ve been on more dates with them where they haven’t bailed than dates with you.” Tim opened his mouth to reply but quickly closed it, instead walking closer, “Darling, please, just listen.” You flinched at his touch, as you pulled away, trying to keep your voice in control you took a deep breath. “Did you ever even love me, Tim?” He flinched at those words as his voice took on a pleading tone, “Babe, you mean the world to me you know that. Please don’t do this.” You shook your head, “I can’t do this anymore. This whole wondering if you love me, wondering if you’re not showing up because I’m not enough.” You choked back a sob as you pointed to the door, “Get out.” Tim tried to step closer before you shouted, “Get the hell out, Drake!” His face clouded with hurt at your words and the use of his last name, as he slowly walked out, but before he did he left a small box on the counter. You walked up to it slowly, opening it to find a necklace with a ring attached to it. You felt tears sting your eyes as you quickly went to calm your thoughts before work.

After work, you were walking back home when you heard a child crying in one of the alleys. You thought to yourself, Maybe someone else will help…, but as you thought that guilt crept into your head and you quickly turned around heading in the direction of the sound. Was it an incredibly stupid idea to go into an alley in Gotham, especially by yourself, yes but if there really was a child in need you had to help. Quickly rounding the corner, you looked around not seeing a child anywhere, “What the hell….” you muttered to yourself as you walked in deeper. Breath quickening as you stepped further in, you felt a sharp sting in the back of your head as your knees buckled. Your head stung and you felt something trickling down the back of your head, ears ringing and vision going fuzzy. You looked up, seeing a large man standing over you with a bat in his hand, “Told ya it’d lure her in…” he said, looking at someone in the corner, as a voice responded, “Couldn’t help yourself huh? You just had to be a hero.” Wincing at the pain in your head, you tried to say something but all that left your mouth was a pained groan, as the man atop you was about to grab your shoulder something whizzed past your vision as the man whirled around shouting in pain. Whatever it was, it had grazed his arm and he was bleeding slightly, as he glanced around, holding his bat tightly. From somewhere behind you there was a loud thud as the man in front of you yelled, “Hey, who are you?!” A figure dressed in red ran past you as the two started fighting. The one in the red suit was gliding around as if he was a butterfly, gracefully avoiding the man’s blows, and throwing his own blows that hit the man each time.

Soon, the fight was over as the one in the red suit hit the man with a final blow, kicking his bat out of his hand and knocking him out. “You okay?” he asked, voice quite familiar to your ears, as he walked up, “You really shouldn’t be walking around in alleys by yourself, especially not in Gotham.” You groaned, trying to sit up, “I- There- I know. It was stupid.” He held his hand out as you accepted, pulling you up with ease, he looked at you. Finally, uncomfortable from the gaze you broke first, “Ummmm...thank you for that. I’m sure you get that a lot since, y’know, I’m assuming you do this every day, but seriously...thanks” He nodded mouth sliding into a tight line as he seemed to be considering something, “Do you want me to take you home, miss?” You were about to decline but felt your knees wobble slightly, “I’ll take that as a yes? I don’t think you’ll make it home without falling on your pretty face.” You smiled softly, “Are you flirting with me?” “I’m trying. Is it working?” Chuckling softly you smiled, as a slight frown replaced it quickly, “I have a boyfriend...sorry.” The man nodded, “I figured….pretty girl like you.” Laughing you smiled, “We’re actually having kind of a fight right now…” you glanced up at him, frown deepening, “I said some harsh stuff to him that I didn’t mean...I’m only saying this to you because we’ll probably never see each other again or at least hopefully not I would prefer to not have my life needing saving every day.” He smiled, “That would definitely be preferable. If I had to save you more than three times I would call it fate at that point.” He was holding you tightly as he swept from rooftops using his grappling hooks or whatever it was called, “Do you believe in fate?” you asked, keeping your eyes on his face, too afraid to glace down. “I’m not sure...Do you?” “Avoiding the question huh? Well...I thought I did. I think I thought fate brought me and boyfriend together...y’know that whole true love and soulmate mumbo jumbo the whole deal.” Laughing at yourself you continued, “I just...I really loved him and I don’t think he felt the same. I was always second most important to whatever it was he did in his free time. All the secrets just became too much...does that make me selfish?” The vigilante shook his head, “I think it makes you honest. You deserve someone who puts you first...someone who doesn’t keep his life a secret from you.”

A couple more minutes and you had arrived at your balcony, “Thanks, for everything tonight and the free therapy session.” you smiled, as he set you down. “No problem, y/n.” You turned around quickly at the mention of your name, “How do you know my name?” you questioned, maybe I let it slip? You thought but you were pretty sure you hadn’t even said your name once, then the idea that his voice sounded familiar set in. “I-uh…” he muttered as you slowly walked up, placing your hand on his cheek, “Tim? Is it you?” you asked gently, as your hand crept up to the edge of his mask, “Can I?” He nodded softly, as you pulled it away, “It is you. I would recognize your voice anywhere.” Tim shuffled awkwardly as he glanced at his feet, charisma from two minutes ago gone now that the mask was off. Then another thought set in, “Were you following me?” you questioned eyes slanting slightly. Tim’s eyes widened as he replied, “You’re missing the big picture here...I kinda saved you...” You laughed slightly as you punched his chest, “I’m messing with you...although I am kind of embarrassed that I complained about you to y’know...you.” Tim smiled softly, “Nothing you said was wrong though... This-” he said as he gestured to himself, “Is a big part of who I am, and I kept it from you it was unfair, especially after two years of you being patient every time I bailed.” He stepped closer, closing the gap as he held your chin, “You deserve to know about this part of me. You mean everything to me y/n y/l/n, I love you.” You leaned into his touch as you smiled softly, as he continued, “I promise I’ll never keep a big secret like this from you again...I just didn’t want to put you in danger and didn’t realize I was hurting you more by keeping you away. If you will, I’d like to make it up to you, maybe dinner tomorrow?” You nodded softly, as you placed a kiss to his cheek, “I’m glad you came to your senses and just so we’re clear you keep things this big from me again then Gotham’s safety will be the least of your worries, Timothy.” He gulped slightly, as he muttered, “Okay, I promise, no secrets especially not big ones.” Then you grabbed his shoulders pulling him down to your height, “How bout you start making it up to tonight? I think Gotham can wait for one night…” Tim grinned cheekily as he pressed his lips to yours, “I’m sure Bruce won’t mind.” You pulled away quickly, “Wait, Bruce, as in Wayne, as in your father? He’s Batman?!” You realized then that your world was about to get a lot more interesting and your homework was going to be the least of your worries when your boyfriend and his family were vigilantes by night.

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selfindulgentpoorlywritten · 5 years ago

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Hip-Check (Matthew Tkachuk Imagine)

Alright y’all, I finally fixed it! Hopefully this version is more coherent now that I’m not drunk off my ass.

Rating: T

Pairing: Matthew Tkachuk/Reader

Words: 1572

Warnings: none

Requested: yes/no

Summary: You’re just trying to get coffee after a long night at work. You end up getting a little extra.

Your job fucking sucks. Well, it doesn’t really, you’re just in a bad mood after a shitty shift. Spring and summer are the busiest time of year, which is stressful enough, but also everything that could go wrong did go wrong today. A real Murphy’s Law of a shift. Your propane tank had a leak, so your forklift ran out and stopped at the far end of the dock, meaning you had to walk all the way down and back with the tanks since everyone else was too busy to grab one for you. Then the system went down, so you had to run all your bills to and from the supervisor’s desk for them to put in directly. Then approximately eight million pallets needed to be repaired or entirely re-stacked throughout the seven hours you were there. Oh, and your unbearable coworker with an obvious crush on you— while also seeming to think you’re his personal therapist— kept stopping by your trucks to chat. So over all, super fun day. Or night, rather. You get off at 6am, meaning it’s 6:15 when you get to Starbucks to treat yourself to something sugary and caffeinated before going to give your friend’s daughter a lift to school.

The drive-through is packed, so you decide to go inside and wait in that hellish line instead. At least that way you can play on your phone without someone honking at you for not moving up two feet .2 seconds after it opens up. You’re not really in the mood to be around people, especially in a noisy place after a noisy night at work, but whatever. You open the door, and just before you can go through, someone darts inside in front of you, jostling you a bit. Irritating on its own, yes, but what really gets your hackles raised is that they don’t even say anything. No apology, no thank you, no nothing. Just breeze past you, fucking ram into you, and say fuck all about it. Any other day, you’d roll your eyes and let it go, but not today. Not today.

“Hey man,” you call as you come in the door behind them, “What the fuck?” They turn to face you, looking annoyed, and oh shit. You know exactly who that is, and you don’t really want to piss him off. But you started it and now you’ve gotta finish it.

“What?” he demands, standing tall and crossing his arms over his puffed up chest like he’s trying to be intimidating.

“Did you seriously just do that?” it’s not really a question, more like a confirmation. A bit of an aggressive confirmation, but.

“I’m in a hurry,” he says, like that’s a legitimate excuse.

“So am I,” you’re not, “You don’t see me pushing people.” A few people had looked over when you’d first confronted him, but they’ve all looked away by this point, more interested in coffee than you two, so you don’t feel too bad. That’s the beauty of cities: no one gives a shit what you do so long as it doesn’t affect them. Tkachuk stares you down, but when you just fold your arms and stare right back, he huffs and rolls his eyes. He throws out a “whatever” and turns his back on you. Oh hell no. You get in line behind him, because you’re not about to wait longer than necessary, but this definitely isn’t over.

“Are you fucking serious, dude?” you hiss just loud enough for him to hear. He turns back toward you.

“I don’t have time for this,” he snips right in your face. This close up, he’s huge, and it’s more than a bit intimidating, but your spite carries you through.

“Neither do the rest of us,” you spit back, “You can wait like everybody else. There’s a fucking line anyway.” This is so stupid. You would’ve held the door for him if he’d just waited a damn minute. Something changes in his expression, though, and he deflates a bit. The person behind you clears their throat, and the two of you shuffle forward to fill the several-person-wide gap that had formed. With that second to breathe, your anger starts to dissipate pretty quickly. God, you’ve been so rude to the other customers, causing a scene like this. At least it seems like Tkachuk is starting to unwind, which makes it easier for you to regain your composure.

“I’m sorry,” he says after a pause, like apologizing was akin to bathing a cat, “It’s just--” He trails off, looks frustrated, shuffles up in the line, looks frustrated some more.

“My sister is in town and I promised I’d get her Starbucks for her first day here,” he explains, like he’d rather be admitting to murder, “I forgot about it, so I’m trying to get it before she wakes up.” Oh. That’s actually. Sweet? Obviously it’s still a dick move to check someone in a coffee shop, but the fact that he did it for a good cause helps soothe your anger all the more.

“I just want everything to be perfect, y’know?” he finishes, head still held high despite his hunched shoulders and clenched fists. You’re not usually a touchy-feely person, but you’re nearly overwhelmed with the urge to hug him. You wish your brothers cared that much about you. While you don’t hug him, you do touch the outside of his wrist with gentle fingertips, looking up into his eyes when they snap to you. They’re a disarming shade of blue that you hadn’t really noticed before, and you almost forget what you were going to say. Focus.

“I’m sure she’ll be happy just to have her brother around,” you assure him, all annoyance forgotten, “As long as you don’t hip check her through a door.” Okay, maybe not entirely forgotten. It gets him to laugh, shaking his head a bit, and his posture relaxes. You can feel the muscles and tendons in his wrist and forearm go slack, and for some reason his hands going soft makes you want to hold them. You’re gonna end up in love with the dude by time you leave, at this rate.

“I really am sorry about that,” he says, “I thought I had enough room.” You just shrug and straighten back up alongside him.

“Eh, It wasn’t that big of a deal,” you dismiss, “I just had a bad day at work and took it out on you. Sorry about that.” His brows look much cuter when they’re furrowed in confusion rather than anger.

“You had a bad day at work already?” he asks. You huff a laugh.

“I work night shift,” you explain, “So I guess more of a bad night at work.” You watch as realization dawns on his face, his mouth making a silent “oh”. Then you realize you’re still basically holding his wrist, so you bring your hand back to your side and hope he didn’t notice, so you can avoid that embarrassment. Except he stops you with a soft grip on your fingers, pulling you to the counter alongside him. He snags a pen from the counter and scribbles something on the back of your hand while effortlessly rattling off his order to the barista.

“And whatever she wants,” he tacks on at the end, motioning to you with a jerk of his head.

“Oh, you don’t have to,” you say, dumbfounded at how far left this interaction has gone. How the hell did you go from wanting to punch him, to him offering to buy your coffee? Damn, you must be charming.

“It’s the least I can do,” he insists, and you’re not about to turn down a free drink. He plunks the pen back onto the counter and pays after you order, still holding your hand. When you look down, you-- oh. That’s. That is his phone number. On your hand. Your hand. After you just chewed him out in public for being rude, and he gave you his number. What the hell.

“I forgot that we have to wait for them to make the drinks, so this doesn’t have the same effect, huh?” he says, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly with one hand, and leading you to the waiting area with the other. Matthew Tkachuk just gave you his phone number. Maybe you got hit in the head with a box on the dock, and this is all a dream. That would make more sense.

“I was gonna say ‘text me’ and walk away all cool, but,” he shrugs, “Doesn’t always work out that way.” He was trying to be cool. He was going to write his number on your hand and walk away “cool”. Well, if he’s going to give you the opportunity, you’re not going to overlook the chance.

“Damn,” you say, shaking your head facetiously, “Gotta work on your timing.” Tkachuk looks mildly devastated until he realizes you’re joking, which makes you feel mildly powerful. He must really want to see you. The both of you chat for a few minutes, the subject switching between hockey and coffee and family until his name is called. He steps forward to take his drinks and when he turns back to you, he looks conflicted.

“Better go give her that coffee,” you say, “I’ll see you later?” A small smile grows on his face.

“Yeah,” he replies, eyes soft, “Yeah, you will.”

#matthew tkachuk imagine #nhl imagines #ri #andis coping mechanism #pls tell me if this doesnt make any sense

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supraveng · 5 years ago

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Agent of Shield - Chapter 2

Summary: You are a relatively new agent at Shield, but not a field agent, apparently that is about to change when you meet the Avengers and they realize you are a valuable asset

Word count:2259

PREVIOUS CHAPTER

I wake up Sunday morning around 5am, I can’t remember the last time I slept for a full 8 hours like that, but I feel so refreshed that I hop right up and head to the kitchen. Checking my phone while my coffee brews, I see a text from my dad just before midnight last night.

Pops: Pumpkin, how was your day? I hadn’t heard from you, I’m sure you are staying busy. Hopefully made it to the shelter today and found yourself a new companion.

Y/N: Good morning Colonel! I was in bed much earlier than you apparently. I’ll call you after my run this morning, love you

I sit down sipping my coffee and grab a protein bar before heading back in my room to change to my favorite leggings and tank. I used to hate running, but after moving to NYC, watching the sunrise as I jog through Central Park makes my day so much better, I can’t imagine missing it even once. This morning I’m a bit earlier than usual and get a chance to take the longer route through the park. The sunrise is as beautiful as ever and adds a calming effect that I crave in this crazy world. I decide to treat myself this morning and swing by my favorite coffee shop while heading down Central Park West. As I step into the shop my phone rings and I answer without looking at the caller id. “Colonel, I told you I would call you when I got home, what’s making you so impatient this morning?”

I state with fake annoyance. “uh, Agent Miller?” I hear in response, ok, that’s definitely not my dad. “Yea, who is this? And how did you get this number?” I respond as I finally look at the caller id and see it’s a blocked number. With a soft chuckle they respond “this is Steve Rogers; Director Fury gave me your number. I didn’t intend on calling you this early, but we received some new communications late last night and hoping you are available to translate for us again.” Wow, he even sounds handsome, how is that possible. “Oh, hi, yes of course I can help. I’m on the upper west side right now, I can be at the tower in 15 minutes, but I just finished a run and I’m kind of disgusting.” Why did you just say that, you idiot? “That would be great, the quicker we can get this resolved, the better. Should we send a car for you?” he asks. “No, I’m good. I’m picking up coffee, do you need any?” Seriously? What is wrong with me? It’s like I hear his voice and turn into an imbecile. “No, but thank you for the offer, see you soon.” he replies before disconnecting the call. I grab my coffee and start heading toward mid-town when I look down and realize what I’m wearing, not only is the word Juicy across my ass, but my tank reads ‘I’m not a rapper, I just cuss a lot’. I laugh at how ridiculous I feel for being worried about what I’m wearing, I should be worried about the sweat that’s beginning to dry on my skin, bleh.

I arrive at the tower just as a security guard is unlocking the door for me. “Good morning” I chirp trying to sound as professional as possible while looking like a huge mess. “They are expecting you in the conference room on the 25th floor, use the first elevator on the left” he responds barely looking up, apparently, he’s not a morning person. “Thanks” I smile as I head toward the elevators. “Nice outfit” he smirks as I walk into the elevator. Well, this should be interesting. Walking down the hall I get an eerie flashback from yesterday’s recordings and try to calm myself to focus on the task and not get too overwhelmed. That worked for almost a full 5 minutes before you walk into the conference room to find Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson dressed in sweats and t-shirts. A girl could die happy here! Deep breath and don’t make an ass of yourself! “Good morning gentlemen, I’m glad you got the dress code memo” I say as I enter the room. “Glad you could make it on such short notice, Agent Miller, this is Sam Wilson. Sam, this is Agent Miller, she is helping us with our translating” Steve smiles as he introduces me. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr. Wilson, please call me Y/N.” “Well, you can call me Sam, and I’m glad none of us overdressed this morning.” he responds as you move closer to the conference room table. “Normally, I would have put a bit more effort into my appearance, but I was finishing my run through the park when you called.” I smile and try to calm my nerves. “It’s 645 in the morning and you were finishing your run?” he asks with a bit of shock. I nod my head and grab a pen and paper off the table. “Geez, your worst than Cap! Wait, what park are you running through in the middle of the night?” he asks with a raised eyebrow and has now caught the attention of Steve, who seems more interested in the conversation now. “Um, Central Park and it’s not the middle of the night, I didn’t get there until almost 530” you say nonchalantly. The are both now looking at you like you have 3 heads. “What? Growing up, I was the lazy one still in bed at 6am. And I like watching the sunrise, it’s a good way to start your day. So, you have another conversation to translate?” you add quickly trying to change the subject.

“Yes, we received a few early this morning, or I guess last night is a better time frame. Anyway, there are a few bits and pieces here and there. Hopefully they have more info for us, but anything we can get will help us at this point.” Steve responds. “Actually, how are your typing skills? There are about 15 different recordings so I was hoping you might be able to type them up as you translate.” he adds looking at you hopeful. “I think I’m around 90 wpm, so that shouldn’t be an issue” “Great, I’ll grab the laptop and you can get started” he claps Sam on the back as he heads out the door. Sam looks you over as if he’s trying to solve a riddle. “You ok?” I ask. “I’m assuming you came from a military family if 6am made you the lazy one, am I right?” he asks with a knowing smile. “Yes, my dad is a marine, and both of my brothers joined after college, one in the Navy and one in the Air Force” you smile realizing that Sam probably knows your dad and your brothers even if he hasn’t figured it out yet. Steve comes back in the room, walking up behind you with the laptop and you realize that he’s now probably read your ass and you are trying your best to not crawl under the table in embarrassment. “Ok, here is everything you should need. The files are in the desktop folder with today’s date. Thanks again for putting your life on hold to help us out.” Steve says as he sets the laptop down in front of you. You relax just from his kind words and smile at him, “it’s my pleasure, Steve”.

You begin working and do your best to not stare and drool over the gorgeous men in the room. Just as you are about to begin your next recording, the buildings AI FRIDAY alerts Steve of a call coming in for you. You look up confused and shrug your shoulders, no one knows you are here. Then you hear Director Fury’s voice loud and clear. “Sorry to interrupt the party going on over there, but Agent Miller? Would you like to explain why Colonel Miller is calling me at this hour on a Sunday morning?” he states sounding as irritated as ever. “That’s probably because he loves you and misses you.” You respond flatly. “Ok, that’s probably only part of the reason, I was supposed to call him when I was done with my run and I got sidetracked. Be a dear and cover for me?” you respond hoping that Nick is in a good mood and willing to help you out. Sam is looking at Steve utterly confused, to which Steve just shrugs and shakes his head, laughing at how you seem completely comfortable around Fury and not at all intimidated like everyone else in SHIELD. “How about you tell him yourself?” he responds before you hear a beep and your dad starting to talk. “Pumpkin, are you there?” You hang your head embarrassed even more than you thought was possible for one day and you’ve only been awake for a little over 2 hours at this point. “Hi dad, I’m so sorry I didn’t call you, but I’m at work right now and I will call you as soon as I’m done, I promise.” You begin bargaining knowing full well it will get you no where but hoping he will take mercy on you. “What are you having for breakfast?” he responds. Your shoulders slump knowing this is only going to get worst. Steve looks at you a little confused as to the question. Ok, I might as well get this over, if I don’t play along with his silly games then this is only going to become more humiliating. “I’m having pineapples covered in guacamole” you respond hoping Sam and Steve aren’t paying attention. You then look up and know they heard but the confused and disgusted expressions on their faces. “Alright, that’s good. Now explain yourself.” he responds, and you take a deep breath. “Dad, I was finishing my run and got called into work. I’m here now but have a bit more work to do, I promise I will call you the minute I’m done and headed home.” “Fine, I wasn’t expecting to see you at the Stark tower at this time of the morning and assumed your body was discarded in the dumpster, that would be the only reason .you hadn’t called and didn’t answer my calls.” “Old man, you are so dramatic” you say with a smirk “and I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.” “Good, bye Pumpkin.”

The call disconnects and you look at Sam and Steve hoping that you can get back to translating but knowing by the looks on their faces they have a lot of questions. “What the hell was that?” Sam asks trying to understand the conversation you just had with your dad. “That was my dad, he’s a bit overprotective and paranoid” you respond hoping that would explain enough. “Wait, your dad is Colonel Miller, as in Colonel Joseph Miller?” he asks. You nod and smile, you love your dad, but he had a reputation of being a big mean Marine, which he could be if he wanted to, but he never was with you, he was a giant teddy bear that worried about you more than necessary. “And your breakfast choice?” Steve asked, still quite confused by what just happened. “Oh, that” I respond “when we were younger, my dad started this thing so that we could relay to him if we were in danger or kidnapped. He asks about what we are eating and the most ridiculous or gross thing you answer means you are fine. If I had answered pancakes, then he would know that I’m in danger, if I add eggs, then I’ve been injured. If I add bacon it’s by someone I know, it’s crazy, and has only been used in innocent situations like today, but like I said he’s paranoid and overprotective” I shrug and smile at the guys. It’s one of the things that made you love your dad, a thousand miles away and still making sure you are protected no matter what. Steve looks at you with his brow furrowed “that’s kind of genius.” I nod “yea, he’s good like that” I respond. “Wait, if he’s your dad, then Joshua and Jacob are your brothers?” Sam asks like he just figured everything out. I nod and smile “Yes, they are, and I apologize for anything they did that got you in trouble, that’s kind of their specialty.” “Are you kidding? Jacob was my saving grace in the Air Force, he is a bad ass and one of the best airmen I’ve ever known!” Sam explains with a huge smile on his face. “Well, I’m glad, he would like to here that, he was medically discharged a few years ago after breaking his shoulder and it not healing as quickly as it should have. He actually just started working with the Secret Service and finally feeling like himself again.” I tell him. “Wow, that’s incredible. I would love to catch up with him. What about Josh? Is he still sailing?” he asks. “Yes, he’s on the west coast, San Diego or maybe Seattle. I’m not sure, he moves around a lot.” I respond. “Well, now that we are all caught up, Sam, can you check the data that just came in? Hopefully, we can get through this info and still enjoy the rest of our day” Steve says thoughtfully as he looks between you and Sam. “Of course” I respond and go back to the recordings.

TAGS @farfromjustordinary

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#agent of shield #marvel au #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #avengers au #avengers fanfiction #avengers fandom #marvel fanfiction #marvel fandom

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elena-mayfair · 5 years ago

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Shadow from a past

Pairing: Dean Winchester x reader, Ethan Hunt x reader (it's complicated), John Wick x reader (wait for it)

Warning: None

Word count: 4842

Disclaimer: I don’t live in New York and never been there so everything is based on my own imagination and sources like movies, tv and games. Forgive me any inconsistencies with a real world. Also I do not own the gifs, credits to the authors. Also also, English is not my first language so I apologize for any possible mistakes.

Summary: I don’t want to spoil to many details so lets just say it is crossfiction between Supernatural and John Wick with a bit of Mission Impossible.

Shadow from the past: Chapter 1

“Be careful while looking into the darkness. Be careful because you might like what you find there”

Dreams. They can be blessing and the curse at the same time. When you hope for them to come usually they are nowhere to be found. Or worse, they are coming but they are not exactly what you were hoping for.

***

“Concierge. How may I be of service?” soft male voice with a slight French accent spoken to the phone.

.........

“It’s Y/N/L. Is he back?”

…

“Miss Y/L/N. I am sorry but I have not seen him tonight”

…

“Thank you. Please let me know if he shows up”

….

“Of course miss Y/L/N.”

….

“Thank you”

….

“Miss Y/L/N…” soft voice spoke again after brief silence “I don’t mean to overstep any boundaries here but how is your wound?”

“What wound?....” no response on the other side of line “Charon? What wound?”

“There is a bullet in your arm....there is a stab wound in your abdomen and left thigh. You are going to die…and there is nothing he can do about it. You are going to die….and no one will mourn after you…”

….. … … … …..

***

You abruptly opened your eyes. You were lying in the bed breathing heavily trying to pull yourself back from a dream. Room was completely dark, one of the benefits of not having a windows in the bedroom. You slowly started gaining conscious. Your hands drifted to your stomach subconsciously but your cold fingers did not found anything suspicious. You slowly and gently got up from a bed trying not to wake up man who was sleeping right next to you.

“It was just a dream” you thought to yourself rubbing your eyes “just a fucking dream”.

You got up from a bed and quietly went to the bathroom. You shut the door behind you and turned on the light. Sudden, sharp and unapologetic whiteness of the celling lamp was hurting your eyes but at the same time it was good for bringing you back to reality.

“Fuck I look like shit” You looked at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes seemed to be tired and sad at the same time, there were visible dark circles below. You haven’t dream this kind of nightmare for years.

“Screw it…there is nothing I cannot fix with a make up” you thought to yourself while splashing cold water on your face.

“Hey sweetheart” you felt a hand wrapping around your waist. You stood up from a bathroom sink with your eyes still closed only to feel him standing right behind you “Having hard time to sleep?” he asked with a husky voice burying his face in your neck and kissing you lightly.

“Dean...” you whispered and put your hands over his wrapping his arms tighter around you “Did I wake you?”

“Nah…alarm clock did” he replied brushing his lips over your neck.

“Liar” you whispered “what time is it?”

“After 6am”

“Damn… it is way too early to be awake” you sighed “Coffee or bed?” you asked turning yourself in his arms to face him. He looked adorable with his messy hair and sleepy green eyes.

“Sweetheart as much as I wish to go back to bed with you….” he started

“I know I know…research, we got work to do blah blah blah” you cut him off annoyed a bit “I’m gonna make some coffee than” you kissed his cheek and left him in the bathroom for his morning routine.

You dressed yourself quickly. Black sweatpants and black tank top seemed like a good option for not such a good morning. You tight your hair in loose messy bun just enough so they would not fell on your face. You grabbed your phone from a night stand and brown leather which was hanging loosely on the chair. Coffee was the mission but on your way to kitchen you decided to take a small detour and walk outside for some fresh air.

Morning was cold and gloomy, dark clouds were all over the sky and morning sun was nowhere to be found. You reached to your pocket for a package of cigarettes and a lighter. It was a routine already. After a nightmare like that you needed some cold air and cigarette.

“What the hell was that” you thought to yourself inhaling a smoke. You closed your eyes enjoying a morning cigarette and you saw it all flashing back. This elegant, modern classic room…old rotatory phone, black satin sheets on the king size bed, Blanton’s Single Barrel Bourbon on the night stand right next to fully loaded Glock 26 and your body cover in blood. You put a cigarette into your mouth and started rubbing your left shoulder “Some wounds will never heal” you thought to yourself.

Dream caught you of guard. True, you were used to a nightmares, you had them since you could remember, way before you entered supernatural world. Perks of being a witch. Your dreams were always vivid and felt very very real. Sometimes there were more than just a dreams. Premonitions would be more accurate, visions of…you didn’t know exactly of what. It’s not like you foreseen the future. It was more a feeling, a warning manifesting through your dreams. Sometimes you had hard time to interpret them correctly and you never talked about it with Dean or Sam. They would understand but you didn’t want to worry them. Especially Dean who was worrying constantly even if he was doing his best not to show it. And there was of course another site to all of it…he did not knew everything about you. There were things that you left hidden from everyone, well almost everyone, but Dean was one of the people that you kept secrets from. Not because you didn’t trust him, you did. He was your friend, your partner, your safe haven and for over 6 years now. And that was the reason why you kept a secrets from him. You didn’t want to ruin what you found here. But past is a past...it creeps out in the darkness, lurks form the shadows, and you can never outrun it.

You inhale thick smoke one last time and you went back to a bunker. Smell of coffee hit your nose and you smiled to yourself hearing Gimmie Shelter by The Rolling Stones playing in the kitchen. You entered a kitchen and saw three steaming cups of coffee on the table, two black and one white, just as you liked it. Sam was sitting in front of his laptop going through morning news as he did every day. Dean on the other hand was behind stove waiving plastic spatula to the beats of music and humming words of the song under his nose.

“Rise and shine Y/N!” he smiled to you “bacon and eggs what you think?”

“Nah thank you I had a breakfast already” you smiled sarcastically sitting down opposite to Sam.

“Yeah… I can smell your breakfast up here” Dean frowned “I thought we’re passed this subject”

“Oh gimmie some brake Dean!”

“I’m just saying smoking ain’t good for ya sweetheart”

“Yeah yeah…and your greasy bacon is?” you snapped back “Dean I don’t have a strength to argue with you before my morning coffee”

“How about some smoothie?” Sam asked lifting his head from a screen of his laptop.

“That sounds more like it. Thank you Sammy” you agreed with a smile

“Oh so that’s how it is?!” Dean teased “smoothie over bacon and eggs?! What’s wrong with you people? Smoothie for god sake…”

“I prefer something energizing and easy to swallow at the morning. You know that hun” you replied with a slightly apologetic voice “I appreciate a gesture but I’m really not feeling like eating anytime soon” you added.

“That bad huh?” Sam asked placing a banana-strawberry smoothie in front of you “Dean mentioned that you had a rough night” he added seeing your puzzled face.

“Yeah, but not that bad as he described it. I had worse”

“You looked pretty freaked out” Dean said sitting to your right with a plate full of eggs, bacon and crispy toasts on a side.

“Like I said…”you said changing your voice slightly to emphasize your words “I had worse. Can we change subject? Sam, you found something good?”

“Yes actually. I believe I found us a case” Sam replied looking back at the screen of his computer.

“Great!!” you almost clapped your hands with excitement. You were feeling very much like hunting today “what is it? Ghost, demons, werewolves, shape shifters, vampires? Please say vampires” you added with a childish voice.

“Someone is eager to hunt…” Dean noticed.

“What?! Don’t blame a girl for need to hunt things and save folks” you replied with most innocent smile that you could master in this moment.

“Mhm…”Dean hummed “more like to put a bullet or ten in some monster head” he pointed out sarcastically.

“I don’t know yet to be honest” Sam continued ignoring your little exchange with Dean “Twelve bodies dropped dead”

“Where?” Dean asked chewing on his bacon.

“New York” Sam replied “One witness reported over dozen of dead bodies in one of the fancy clubs in Manhattan. All brutally murdered, at least 3 bullets per body”.

“That doesn’t sound like us. It’s more Gangs of New York than Ghostbusters” Dean mumbled through eggs.

“Maybe. But there is more to the story” Sam scrolled a bit through the article “Witness is 25 years old Karen Davis, collage student. She stated that over the course of about 5 minutes she heard multiple gun shots and saw bodies dropping on the floor. She run outside along with other people. She called police and when cops showed up she went back to club with a company of three officers. And this is where it’s getting interesting. All bodies were gone. No trace of a gun shots, blood, bodies or anything. Like nothing ever happened”

“So what cops are saying?” Your interest definitely peeked.

“Nothing. Mass hysteria caused by a prank. No bodies, no case” Sam replied.

“Worth checking out” you stated “maybe it’s a hunting. It’s a New York. Lots of people could die in there. We’ve seen that before. Ghost trapped into loop reliving their own death”

“Alright looks like we do have case” Dean drank what left of his coffee and stoop up “You kids go grab a gear and pack our stuff and I’m going to check on baby. It’s a day ride to New York”

“Fancy club in New York…” you sighed “That means suits, heels and ties”

“That’s right baby! It is time for tight skirt and heels!” Dean smirked at you and left to garage.

***

Two days later you stood in front of NYPD 14th precinct in Manhattan New York. It wasn’t your typical hunting area. Rarely were you hunting in the big cities like New York, frankly you could remember one or two cases which you took in big cities. All of it due to the fact that it was definitely tougher to do your job here than in small cities. People were tougher to crack, harder to talk with and they usually pretended that they see nothing even if they undoubtedly saw something. And police…police was whole different story all together. Let’s just say that it was easier to fool small town cop then big city cop. But couple last weeks were quiet and frankly you all started to actively search for a job. You especially were bored out of your mind and annoyed with your daily routine. Because what hunter can do when there is nothing to hunt? Argue with Dean over socks he left again next to the bed in your shared bedroom. Or his boxers he left on the floor in the bathroom. Or how messy bathroom sink looked like every time after you finished your make up. Or the fact that he wants to watch Aliens six time over last two weeks. Or about how much he drinks, or how much you smoke. Or how much Sam is annoyed by both of you. Or the fact that you forgot a pie…again.

It was about time for a hunt because you all were starting getting on each other nerves.

“Alright, time for a show” you thought to yourself looking at your reflection in the Impala windshield.

“You look absolutely amazing” Dean complemented sizing you from head to toe.

“Well thank you mister” you smiled with a charm. You knew very well how good you look. You did your absolute best today. When putting your outfit today you decided to look professional but sexy and dangerous at the same time. You decided to wear black leather-ish fitted pants with high waits, black sleeveless satin blouse unbuttoned just enough to cause a distraction to any cop that you will talk to today. You left your heels home, only woman knows how hard it is to run in heels, and you bet on your trusty suede booties which looked like they were one with a leather pants. On top you put your favorite brown leather jacket which was always useful, especially for hiding gun on your lower back. Hair you put into tight, sleek high pony tail.

“Still got it” you thought to yourself satisfied of the look that you managed to put together. It was New York, and you had to be honest with yourself, you and New York had a history together. As much as you wanted to suppress memories creeping out in every corner you couldn’t. There was something odd about being back in Big Apple. Something strangely comforting and familiar yet oddly unnerving at the same time. Something was off and deep down you felt that clearly.

Dean stood right next to you and fixed his tie just to teas the fact that you were checking yourself out in the windshield.

“Well how do I look?” he winked at you.

“Dangerous… if you get any lucky maybe some foolish girls will end up in your bed today” you winked back at him and walked towards the precinct.

“If you get any lucky maybe you will score today too. With this ass it won’t be hard” he teased quietly but loud enough so you could hear him.

“Hush! Behave yourself” you scolded him with a smile “Be professional, we got work to do”

“Yes mam!” with that Dean approach the counter “Agent Page and Tylor FBI” he introduced himself and you flashing badge in front of the officer.

“We’re here about shootout in the Skyfall club” you followed flashing your badge and slightly hovering over the counter. You didn’t even have to think about what you do or what you say, it was routine already for Dean and you. You did that together way too many times.

“Follow me agents.” Police officer replied shortly with a slightly shaky voice and he led you to the commissioner office.

“Like taking candy from a baby” you thought to yourself satisfied that everything was going smooth like usual. Until it didn’t…

….

It was only split of second, you weren’t even truly sure if you really saw what you thought you saw. Or more like who you thought you saw. Maybe it was a wave of brown hair, or way he walked, or the smell of leather, fresh air and Code by Armani which followed him. All of that was more than enough to lose your cool for a moment. You slowed down loosing your rhythm with Dean and your eyes followed the smell and the felling.

….

“Was that…” you thought to yourself.

……

“Agent Tylor?” Dean voice brought you back to reality “Everything alright?” he was looking at you disoriented.

….

“Yeah…” you said with barely audible voice “Yes agent Page, everything alright. It was just a hunch. Though I saw something” you added out loud catching up to him. “Shall we?” you added and you entered commissioner office not waiting for Dean.

Office was dark, full of boxes, office containers, coffee cups and papers lying all over. Cigarette smoke was floating in the air clearly visible in dimmed light which immediately caused irritation in Dean. Commissioner was old school cop who surely seen too much in his long years of duty.

“Commissioner Loeb” he introduced himself not lifting his eyes from the document he was trying to read “Agents…?”

“Tylor and Page” you introduced yourself and Dean “We would like to talk to you about…”

“Yeah Skyfall club shootout. I heard” he cut you off with his eyes still focused on the document “Nothing to talk about here. There is no case. There never was one to begin with”

“We will decide if there is a case or if there is none” Dean spoke up with cold gruff voice “We would like to see case files” he added.

“Of course you would like to see case files” still looking at the document “But let me ask you this one agent” he emphasized last word “Why FBI is suddenly interested in none existing case involving shootout which never happened?”

“Well commissioner” you spoke up “it is none of your business I believe. And correct if I’m wrong but I believe we are the one here who are asking a questions. Your job is to politely answer them and help us do our job” you added with a smooth voice at you sat down on the opposite side of the desk. “You don’t mind?” you asked rhetorically reaching for a cigarettes in your pocket and lighter on his desk. That move definitely caught his attention, exactly as you hoped it would.

He finally looked up from the document which he was so stubbornly reading just in time to see your cleavage exposed while you were hovering over his desk.

“I definitely don’t” he said firmly not even trying to hide his interest in your breasts. You could swear that you heard Deans jaw clench while he took two small steps to stand right behind you.

“Stupid rules don’t you agree?” you said lighting up your cigarette “No smoking indoors. I wish I could find an asshole who came up with this rule and show him what I think about it”

“I completely agree with you agent Tylor” commissioner replied. You knew you had him on a hook. Just like you planned.

“Call me Y/N” you replied looking him directly into eyes “So about this non existing case involving shootout which never happened” you continued “Files? I’m sure you have a report somewhere here”

“Of course, of course” commissioner started going through pile of folders stacked on the side of his desk “Got it! Here you go agent Tylor” he handed you over a folder with a smile that immediately created in you need to punch him in the face.

“Thank you commissioner” you smiled charmingly and passed folder to Dean without even looking at it. You played your part, you got a files.

“See…that wasn’t so hard wasn’t it?” Dean uttered with a snarky voice taking a files from you. He quickly went through the pages “That’s it?”

“Well that’s all we could gather” commissioner defended himself “Like I said there is no case.”

“Let me make this straight. You did get 911 call from a panicked girl who reported that she heard multiple gunshots and she saw at least dozen of bodies dropping on the ground and you didn’t even bother to take an official statement from her?” Dean summarized.

“You forgetting agent that after my guys arrived to check out so called shootout they found absolutely nothing. No guns, no blood, no bodies, no tracers of any shootout” commissioner defended again “You won’t tell me that someone wiped this place clean in a matter of less than 20 minutes”

“Yeah that is exactly what we could expect from you and your guys” Dean snapped back “We gonna keep this and do expect visit from upstairs” he waved the folder and started to walk out.

“Thank you for cooperation commissioner” you put down your cigarette and followed Dean.

“Agent Tylor!” commissioner rose up from his chair “Let me know if you need any help. Any help at all”

“We won’t” you replied with charming smile and you walked outside with Dean.

“Like taking candy from a baby….”

***

“Well that was a bummer” Dean stated and open passenger seat doors for you “We got stinking pile of nothing”

“I kinda expected that to be honest, we knew right from the get-go that this case stinks for miles” you took your gun out of the holster on your lower back and sat comfortably in passenger seat.

“Yeah we did but I kinda hoped that they will give us something y’know, anything to catch onto. And we don’t have even witness address.” Dean took his seat in the driver seat “Let’s hope that Sam had a better luck with researching on history of the building”

You stayed quiet, your eyes focused on the entry to the precinct.

“But let me tell ya sweetheart it was pure pleasure to watch you in action” Dean smirked and turned on Impala’s engine. She purred pleasantly. “The way you played that cop! You were on your A game! New York is bringing out your inner famme fatale” he continued but you were not there anymore. You drifted in your thoughts thinking about smell of leather and Code. Impala purred quietly trying to bring you back from your thoughts but you drifted even further.

…..

You thought about dark grey 1969 Ford Mustang that you used to love so much. You could see him quietly driving with his hand on your knee. You could see his small smile and his stealthy looks in your direction when you were looking outside of the window relaxing while wind was blowing your hair. You could feel his gentle touch, you could taste bourbon on his lips and you could smell Sauvage by Christian Dior on him mixed with gun powder and something else…something dangerous.

…..

“Y/N you with me?” Dean gave a worried look pulling you back to reality.

“Mhm…” You couldn’t shake of that feeling that rising up inside you. Feeling which was telling you that this case is far from your normal supernatural gig. That there is no hunting, no ghosts trapped in the loop and that you should have never come back to New York. There was a passed creeping in the shadows and you knew very well that you cannot outrun it.

“I’m sorry babe, I zone out” you looked back at Dean “I was thinking you know….we don’t have any lead except the club so let’s go check out the club. What you think? I bet we will spot our witness there”

“You really think that three days after shootout she will be already back on the dance floor?” Dean hesitated.

“I’m sure of it. See this is a New York it’s Manhattan and Skyfall is apparently hot in this season. If you want to mean anything in your little social world you gotta be there. Shootout or no shootout. That’s how it is here”

“You would know would ya’. You used to live here” Dean pointed out”

“Yes I did. Many many years ago” you replied shortly” “In a very different life” you added silently and you drifted again in your thoughts.

***

Two hours later you were standing in front of the Skyfall club waiting for your partner who was on “finding parking spot” mission. It was Friday evening and lack of a parking spot was something that you very much expected. But Dean being Dean wouldn’t agree to leave baby and take a cab. Even when faced with all the logical reasons presented by you he still stubbornly refused. You were wondering which was more inconvenient for him, the fact that you dared to suggest that taking a cab is a better option or the fact that you decided that he needs to go shopping. While going through his clothes you sadly discovered that you have only two options, suit or flannel and destroyed denims none of which was suitable for high class club in Manhattan. You forced him to where simple white shirt with sleeves rolled up to an elbow and dark blue denims the only one which didn’t have any history of hunting on them and not because they were the only one clean, it was because he hated them and never wore them. He claimed that he looked like a hipster douchebag and never listened to your counterarguments.

“Where are you Dean” you thought to yourself looking at your watch. It’s been over 20 minutes and you were starting to feel like ditchable prom date. You took a deep breath scouting your surroundings. You knew this area very well, you recognized the streets, the corners, the alleys… there was history looping in every one of them. Couple blocks away there was a small jazz club which you used to visit very often, and a bit further the hotel in which you stayed way too many times. You knew it was there without need to see it. Beautiful Neo-Renaissance building glooming on the corner of the street, inconspicuous on the outside, with a velvety black canopy above the entrance and two doorman standing on both sides of the stairs. Suddenly the strange feeling from earlier came back and hit you with twice of a force. “Fuck it, I need a drink…or ten” you thought to yourself and entered the club alone.

Place was crowded with people in their 20’s and 30’s searching for a glimpse of happiness. It wa lighted with warm yellows, browns and golden lights spreading more exotic and cozy vibe, something you definitely did not expected. You were expecting more cold blues and whites and silvers and more modern vibe. It was a pleasant surprise none the less. You smoothly maneuvered through the dance floor to the bar. You leaned over the bar waiting for a bartender to come to you.

“Whisky on the rocks” he said with a wink and placed a glass in front of you “Something good am I right? Glenmorangie 18yo” he poured you double with single ice cube.

“Well…impressive” you stated taking a sip of your favorite whisky.

“Oh honey I’m good but that that good” he smiled “it’s from guy over there” he pointed with his eyes to the booth in the corner behind you.

You smiled and turned back thinking that Dean finally manage to find a parking spot but there was no one there. Only an empty whisky glass on the table and empty sit.

Hundred thoughts went through your head all at once and felling of unease rose up deep inside. Your heart started pumping much faster than usual. You knew you lied to yourself. You never said a word to Dean about 18yo scotch that you’ve been currently drinking…how he would know. You took a glass and walked straight to a booth. You didn’t know what for honestly. You wanted to check for a clues, you wanted to find out if your felling was correct. Or perhaps you wanted to prove yourself wrong. Memories flashed through your mind…

Mustang, jazz, Sauvage, Glenmorangie…his love voice, his gentle touch, his small smile, his “This won’t end up well”…

You were making your way through the crowd, eyes focused on the glass, trying to suppress all the memories coming back to you. You forgot about case, about witness, about shootout about everything else. You were almost there, you could see clearly that ice did not melted yet, you could smell…

….

Code

…..

You froze in your place for a moment absorbing sudden shift in the atmosphere around you. You knew that this time you did not imagined it. Everything else disappeared, loud music seemed to be distant, dancing people seemed to dance in slow motion, reality shifted and slowed down.

You slowly turned around and you saw him walking directly towards you with his big brown eyes focused like a laser. Light was twinkling on his face almost masking curiosity mixed with anger, surprise and a bit of happiness… perhaps?

“Y/N” he said without braking an eye contact. He stood few steps away from you his hand dangerously close to his side, where he most likely held his gun.

….

“Ethan” you replied with trained, polite voice.

…..

“You working again?” he asked still completely focused on you. His face tense in the anticipation.

And with that question you knew, you were sure that there was no case, no ghost, no hunting and there was definitely a shootout. You knew that he was here, he order you a drink and he is involved in all of this. Past catch up with you, there is no other way than forward. You knew that to that question there was only one correct answer.

…..

“Yeah, I am”

***

Chapter 2

#dean winchester #john wick x reader #john wick #dean winchester x reader #supernatural #john wick fanfic #john wick imagines #John wick fanfiction #Dean winchester imagines #Ethan hunt #ethan hunt x rader #mission impossible #supernatural fanfiction #Crossfiction #Supernatural owns me

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marvellous-fangirl · 5 years ago

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Undercover

You and Steve go undercover on a mission, but it gets compromised

Oneshot

Word Count: 2,760

Pairings: Steve x Reader

Warnings: Fluff, UncomfortableWithRomanticEmotions!Steve

A/N: This has to be one of my favourites ngl

Y/N collapsed into a chair in the briefing room, yawning. “So remind me why we’re up at 6am?” She stretched. “We’ve located a major Hydra scientist.” Began Fury. “He has highest level clearance in their facilities and we need to capture him to find out what he knows, but also to allow us to infiltrate the base.” Heads nodded. “But surely the areas that require highest level clearance will have high security measures?” asked Steve. “There are retinal scans, voice recognition, and three different guard stations to verify ID.” Replied Fury. “How are we going to infiltrate the base when none of us look like him?” added Natasha. “We’ll use his pass to forge a new one. We’ll also hack into the Hydra systems to add retinal and vocal data. Parker, I understand your friend is good with computers.” Peter’s eyes lit up and he nodded. “Mr Fury can I call him now?” Fury smirked slightly. “Sure kid.” Peter pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialled Ned’s number. “Hey Ned is anyone else there?” Y/N could hear the distant voice resonating from the phone. “No why? Peter is everything ok?” Ned hissed in the distance. “The Avengers want the Guy in the Chair!” Peter grinned. Y/N heard distant muffled screaming. “So I’ll take it he agreed.” Fury chuckled and Peter blushed slightly but returned the smile as he nodded. “Excellent. Now, the only way we can capture the scientist without Hydra being notified is to befriend him and lure him to a seemingly innocent event. Whoever goes undercover must have no contact with us and must be able to be perceived as a friend.” “Y/N should be a part of it.” Tony said and others nodded. “Ideally those who go undercover would be a feasible couple.” Fury added. All eyes turned to Steve, who turned slightly pink. “Sure I’ll do it.”

Y/N was packing her bags when Steve knocked on her door. Y/N looked up, hair flicking out of her eyes. “Hey Steve.” She smiled. “Hey Y/N.” He said, leaning against the doorframe, arms folded. “I uh just wanted to check you’re alright with the whole uh couple thing.” Y/N laughed slightly. “Of course I am!” Steve smiled with relief at her words. “Okay.” “So what kind of couple are we anyway? Moving into our first apartment? Fiancés? Married?” She grinned, adding a wink to the last possibility. Steve flushed again and Y/N straightened up. “Are you sure you’re alright with this Steve?” “Huh? Oh yeah yeah I am.” He smiled. “How about we’re just getting our first apartment? Then we’re taking it slow.” Y/N smiled. “That sounds great.” Grinned Steve.

Y/N pulled on her hoodie and slipped a ring onto her finger. She grabbed a box of her things and pulled her suitcase behind her. Y/N saw Steve and couldn’t help but to laugh. “What is it with you guys with wearing baseball hats under hoodies with sunglasses when you’re supposed to be blending in?” She cackled. Steve looked mildly offended. “I want to hide my face!” He said, hurt. “People are more likely to look at your face if you’re wearing ridiculous clothes like that.” Y/N giggled and Steve frowned. “Oh come on at least take the sunglasses off.” She grinned, nudging him playfully. He smiled and rolled his eyes as his slid the sunglasses into his pocket. Fury stepped forward, ready to meet them. “Rogers, Y/L/N.” He nodded. “We have provided you with furniture to make the move in more realistic. There is also a car which you will drive to the location. The scientist lives on the same floor as you just down the hall. You’ll know who he is. Good Luck. You have a year. I hope it won’t have to last that long but you must do whatever is required.” The pair nodded. “Can we say goodbye to everyone before we go?” Y/N asked and Fury chuckled. “Of course. I’m not a monster.”

Y/N stepped out of the car with her box and slipped her hand into Steve’s who pulled a large suitcase behind him with ease. Steve smiled down at Y/N as they walked up to their new apartment together and Y/N tried not to grin. As they unlocked the door and stepped inside, Steve pulled his hand out of Y/N’s a little too quickly as he stepped over to the new furniture provided by Fury and he went through to the bedroom. “We’re sharing a bed.” Steve said, coming back to the main room and sitting on the sofa next to Y/N. Y/N smiled. “Is that alright with you?” Steve hesitated. “Uh yeah if you are.” Y/N rested her head on his shoulder. She could feel how tense his muscles were but he put his arm around her shoulders and he relaxed slightly. Y/N smiled to herself as he turned on the new TV.

A knock on the door interrupted their entertainment and Steve got up to greet the visitor. Y/N was watching from the sofa. Three people were standing there, evidently their new neighbours. “Welcome to the building!” Said a young man with a handsome moustache. “Thank you!” Steve grinned. “I’m Sam and that’s Natasha over there.” Y/N smiled and waved from the sofa. The trio leant around Steve’s large figure to get a better look at her and they waved in return. “We were wondering if you would want to come to a welcome party to help you get to know everyone in the building?” A middle aged lady asked. Y/N had gotten up from the sofa and wrapped her arms around Steve’s waist, hugging him from the side. “We’d love that.” She smiled looking up at Steve, who leaned down and kissed her forehead. “You two are cute.” The lady said. Y/N chuckled. “We think we are.” She smirked and Steve laughed with the others.

Steve was waiting for her by the door and Y/N grabbed her bag as she slipped her hand into his once again. She smiled softly. “Shall we go then?” Steve grinned and they made their way to the apartment. They were greeted by many faces and conversation was easy. They nailed their characters’ stories down to a point and there was no sense of doubt whatsoever. The pair had also done extra research the night before so they would be prepared for questions. Part way through the welcome wagon, Steve and Y/N shared a look that clearly said that they were happy with how well the night was going. They were talking about some things that they needed for the conversation, when a thin, greasy man introduced himself. “I don’t believe we’ve met.” He smiled, holding out his hand, his British accent thick. Y/N shook it, a friendly smile on her face and Steve grinned and took his hand enthusiastically. “My name is Tobias Meade.” “It’s so nice to meet you! I’m Natasha and this is Sam.” She smiled. Steve grinned. “Is that a British accent I detect?” He asked and the man chuckled. “Indeed it is. I grew up in Hampshire.” Y/N smiled and nodded. “And then I studied in London and moved here three years ago.” “What did you study?” Y/N asked. “Oh you know. This and that. Science mainly.” “Sounds fascinating. Anything specific or is it government secrets?” She winked and the man shifted uncomfortably. Y/N realised she may have made a mistake. “Ah well you could say that.” The man mumbled before disappearing into the groups of people. Y/N groaned. “I just blew it, didn’t I.” Steve hugged her and put on a laugh. He leant down to whisper in her ear. “We’re fine I promise you.” He kissed her forehead then hesitated. “Are you ok with me doing that?” He asked and Y/N laughed genuinely. “Of course I am.” She chuckled and she leant into the super soldier for another hug.

“What’re you doing Steve?” He snapped the sketchbook shut. “Nothing.” Y/N raised an eyebrow. He got up from his armchair and clearly went to hide it. He came back and sat down next to Y/N on the sofa. Y/N snuggled under his arm and she felt his muscles tense then relax. He played with her hair and she smiled slightly. Steve slouched down and Y/N repositioned her head onto his chest. He put his legs up on the coffee table and Y/N rested hers on top of his. She looked up at him to see a soft smile on his face. She grinned. Both of their breathing gradually grew heavy and they eventually fell asleep.

Y/N stirred slightly as Steve carried her through to the bedroom. He laid her on her side of the bed and pushed the hair out of her face, before placing a light kiss on her forehead. He sat down on the other side, causing Y/N to roll slightly into the middle. He lay down, distributing his weight more and Y/N smiled to herself as his arm tentatively wrapped around her waist.

Y/N felt Steve sit up on the edge of the bed as the sun leaked through the blinds. She rolled over to watch him. His head was in his hands. “Steve you alright?” She asked. He jumped slightly before turning to look at her. He scanned her face before smiling. “I’m great.” He said and Y/N smiled tiredly. He lay down next to her. “How about we go and explore this neighbourhood then.” It was her turn to study his face now. He looked stressed and tired, yet somehow also relaxed. She didn’t push into that though and nodded instead. They got up to get dressed. Steve had pulled on his trousers and was looking for a top when he turned a bright shade of pink because he turned around to see Y/N standing in jeans and a bra. His eyes widened and he spun around to face away from her, burying his face in his hands. “Steve?” Y/N asked. Steve turned and saw that she still hadn’t put a top on and flushed an even deeper shade. Y/N giggled and tackled him into a hug, the skin to skin contact sending shocks up and down Steve’s body.

Y/N and Steve walked hand in hand through the mall, Y/N swinging their arms back and forth playfully. Y/N leant into Steve, pointing at mannequins in the windows. He chuckled when she criticised clothing and was pulled into multiple shops and asked for opinions. Steve insisted on buying her a small star necklace that she couldn’t stop looking at and she thanked him repeatedly throughout the day.

As they were walking, Steve’s arms laden with bags, Y/N spotted Tobias and waved. She could feel Steve’s grip tighten on her hand but she didn’t show that in her face. The scientist made eye contact, paused before smiling and beckoning the pair over to him. Y/N instantly dragged Steve with her, who stumbled but regained his footing. “Hey Tobias.” “Ah hello.” He replied, smiling slightly. “Natasha I was wondering if I could have your opinion on a few items.” He asked. Y/N nodded and smiled. “Of course!” Steve made to follow her. “Ah Sam. I was wondering if I could have Natasha’s opinion alone.” Y/N smiled and nodded. Steve hesitated unnoticeably for Tobias for a split second before breaking into a smile and nodding, clapping the British man on the shoulder, who flinched but smiled in return. Y/N followed the scientist into a store and over to a corner. She felt something sharp against her leg. “Do not look down.” Tobias murmured, pointing at shelves and then acting like he was asking her opinion. “Now turn to the Captain over there and wave reassuringly.” Y/N’s heart was pounding in her chest. She turned to Steve and waved with a smile, his worried stare flooded with relief. “I know who you are Y/L/N and if you want to make it back to your friends then you’ll do exactly as I tell you.”

Steve and Y/N had travelled back to their apartment that evening and when Steve awoke in the middle of the night, his arms instinctively searched for Y/N. He carefully reached over to the other side of the bed, only to find cold, empty bed sheets. His heart stopped and he sat bolt upright. He fumbled for the lamp and flicked it on, to see an empty bed, which had been abandoned hours ago. He leapt out of bed, tugging on a hoodie and he ran into the rest of the apartment, searching for Y/N but she wasn’t there. The front door was bolted from the inside so she couldn’t have left that way. He felt a cold breeze on the back of his neck and he looked to the window, which was open a crack. He rubbed his eyes and went back into the bedroom. He opened the wardrobe and pulled a trunk out of the base of it, causing the floor to shake with the weight of its impact. He unlocked and opened it, then started to change.

Steve opened the window and took a small breath before jumping out of it, landing on his shield with a thud that knocked the air out of his lungs. He stood up, dusted himself off, then spoke into his comms. “Fury do you copy.” The line crackled for a few seconds before Fury’s deep voice responded. “Rogers I copy. We’re tracking her now.” Steve flexed his neck. “Steve we’ve found her.” Natasha’s voice spoke clearly into his ear. “Only six blocks north of you, but she’s moving.” Steve bolted in the given direction, not even bothering to respond.

Steve ran into the middle of the road, not caring about the squealing of brakes, the complaints of car horns and the shouts of “Oh my God is that Captain America?!”. “Nat which car is it.” He half yelled, energy slowly seeping out of him, despite his super soldier form. “Black limo, second lane.” Steve pushed himself even harder, running as fast as he possibly could and soon he was running alongside the vehicle. He peered through the darkened windows and just about made out the figure of Y/N slumped unconscious in a corner. He shattered the passenger seat window and swung into the limo. He smashed the driver in the face, unclipped the man’s seatbelt and pushed the bleeding body out of the door after leaning across and opening it. He quickly clambered into the driver’s seat before the limo lost control and he sped away from the mess behind him towards the Avengers Compound.

Y/N opened her eyes, then shut them immediately due to the bright white lights in the medical bay. She rubbed her eyes with one hand as they gradually adjusted and stretches, muscles screaming in protest. She looked down at her other hand, grasped in that of a super soldier, who was dosing in an armchair next to her bed. She smiled softly and squeezed his hand. Steve jumped and looked at his hand. Y/N watched his gaze dart up her arm, from her hand to her face. His face broke into a joyous and relieved smile. His eyes were slightly red and puffy. “Y/N.” He breathed, holding her hand tightly within his. “You’re alright.” Y/N kept smiling. “Of course I am.” She said. “Steve have you been crying?” She added, quietly. Steve avoided her gaze and nodded ever so slightly. “I was so worried.” Steve whispered. Y/N brought her hand up to Steve’s cheek, where she wiped away a fresh tear with her thumb. Steve leant into her hand and she smiled. Fury stepped into the room. “Y/N. I see you are awake. We need to debrief you as the mission failed.” “That isn’t technically our fault.” Y/N replied with a smirk and Steve chuckled. “Indeed.” Fury added. “I must say your acting was not at fault.” “It wasn’t really acting.” Steve murmured, looking at Y/N, who’s sarcastic expression softened. Fury chuckled. “I’ll leave you two lovebirds alone. We can debrief later.” He said, turning on his heel, leaving the pair blushing a bright shade of red. They then laughed and Steve kissed the palm of Y/N’s hand which was still against his cheek. “Y/N... there’s something I need to.. uh.. tell you.” “I think I can guess.” “So do you want to... uh..” “Fondue?” She grinned, bursting into laughter at Steve’s expression, who was making a mental note to never tell her anything ever. “How about a date?” He suggested and she chuckled, pulling Steve into a long kiss.

#marvellousfanfics #marvel #avengers #marvel fanfic #marvel imagine #avengers fanfic #avengers imagine #steve rogers #captain america #chris evans #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers imagine

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spn-ficfanatic · 6 years ago

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Shot Through The Heart Pt 2

Part 1 was requested by @imaginationisgrowth and can be read HERE. I’m so sorry this is so late, I’m too much of a perfectionist sometimes. Man, can you imagine if I posted my full series’ chapter by chapter? It’d take a year to get through 3 parts lol

Summary: In this twisted SPN AU!fic, Dean went to Harvard to become a doctor and Sam stayed with their dad. In part 1 Sam brought you into the ER, covered in blood, and Dean looked after you. Now, you’re on the road with the brothers as they hunt their missing father and you hope to return the favour to Dean.

Characters: Dean x Reader, Sam Words: 2325 Genre: Fluff mostly

You relished in the fresh air as the Impala sped off down the street away from Dean’s apartment. You’d started to get cabin fever, and some time on the road was just what the doctor ordered. You could tell Dean was enjoying himself too, despite what he’d want you to believe. The moment he stepped into the car he stroked the wheel like it was a long-lost lover and you had to bite back a giggle.

“You ok back there?” Dean asked concerned, looking back to check on you. You looked around at the mountain of pillows he’d placed behind you and surrounding you, and the blanket tucked around your feet, and huffed out a laugh.

“Could have done with a couple of extra pillows but I think I’ll survive,” you teased, earning a laugh from Sam in the passenger seat. “Just watch the road old man.”

The journey out of state was filled with laughter and stories from past hunts. Dean told a few risque tales of life on campus which did little to keep your mind off the events of only a few hours prior. You made a mental note to talk to him privately the first chance you got; the last thing you wanted was Sam being privy to the knowledge that his brother and yourself had shared a couple of sweet confusing moments before he rocked up.

You and Sam each shared a few hours of shut eye before reaching the first hotel, and you looked out the door with excitement. You peeled yourself away from the pillows and slid across the seat to exit the door on the other side, and stretched gently once you were outside.

“Hey careful, no popping anymore stitches,” Dean scolded, pointing at your sternly.

“Geez Dad, lighten up,” you responded, rolling your eyes.

“Yer Dad, lighten up,” Sam teased as he passed with the bags, grinning and winking at you as he did. You laughed and followed behind, having already been forbidden to carry anything heavier than a pistol.

You checked the bed carefully before sitting down, still tired despite the rest you’d just had in the car. Sam had decided a quick easy hunt would be a good way to get Dean back into the game, and had managed to track down a simple salt and burn to this town.

“So, what’s the first step to gank this ghost?” you asked, eager to help out however you could. You didn’t miss the glance Dean and Sam shared, and frowned slightly.

“Actually…” Sam started.

“Oh CUMMON! You’re not sidelining me already! It’s a goddamn salt and burn!” you yelled, which had Sam and Dean step back.

“How could you possibly know what I was gonna say?” Sam questioned, wide-eyed.

“Either I’m a fucking psychic, or I just know men better than I care to,” you grumbled, grabbing your clothes as you stormed off into the bathroom. “I’m taking a shower, you two do whatever the hell you want to.”

You slammed the door as hard as you could, which only gave you a moment of satisfaction before the anger came back. Biting back the tears you ran the water and started to undress. A small knock on the door interrupted you, and without bothering to put your top back on you pulled the door open a few inches, blocking the view of whichever brother was brave, or stupid, enough to bother you.

“What!?” you snapped, and Dean put his hands up in defense.

“Y/N seriously, only 7 hours ago you were puking up your guts and I was resewing the bullet hole in your chest, all I’m asking is you take one day to settle dow- are you naked?”

His sudden realisation cut him off, and you smirked wickedly. His eyes had started at your own but had slowly travelled down your torso as he spoke, landing where you had devilishly left a little side-boob hanging out.

“I’m about to have a shower Dean, what do you think?” you told him, with a hint of a flirt in your voice. He swallowed thickly, his adam’s apple bobbing up and down, and you had to bite your tongue to keep from laughing out loud.

“Dean, my eyes are up here,” you told him, using your finger to lift his chin. His eyes were full of lust and you couldn’t help but wish Sam would go on this hunt by himself.

“Focus Dean, you have a job to do. I’ll be fine, I’ll do what you say and I’ll stay put for now. Just be safe alright?” you relented.

“Thank you. We’ll only be gone a couple of hours. Maybe order in some pizza or something,” he told you, leaning over as if to kiss you on the cheek but then pulling back in the same second. You sighed as he walked away, and closed the door behind you so you could have your shower in peace.

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The room was dark when Sam and Dean returned from the hunt, earlier than expected. It really was a simple case, they didn’t even have to wait for sundown to do the salt and burn, and Dean felt a little bad for not including you after all. He’d planned to take you out to dinner to apologise but you were fast asleep when they came back.

“I take it you two are sharing?” Sam asked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

He’d been on Dean’s back the entire time they were gone, asking what was going on between the two of you. Dean denied any feelings but his brother wasn’t buying it, and had decided to make it his personal mission to get the two of you together... Starting with bed sharing.

“May as well, not like we haven’t before,” Dean replied nonchalantly, knowing it would drive his brother crazy. As he suspected, he made a face but Dean quickly shut him up by pointing out your sleeping form.

“Sshhh,” he scolded, quickly changing into his boxers and climbing in next to you. He fell asleep quickly, and when he shifted in his sleep only 10 minutes later to spoon you Sam looked on with a smile.

The curtains in the room sucked, and as the first beam of sunshine hit the window pane the entire room lit up. You groaned quietly as you stirred, you heart rate increasing when you realised who was draped over you. You rubbed the sleep from your eyes and looked up just as Sam slipped into the room with a coffee.

“Dude, it’s 6am. Normal people are still in bed,” you mumbled, and slid out of the bed carefully so as not to wake Dean. The angle jostled your wounds and you hissed as you moved, and Sam abruptly looked up from untying his shoelaces.

“You OK?” he asked concerned, starting to stand.

You waved him off as you walked over to the kitchenette. “Sit down Lassie I’m fine, just a bit stiff in the morning is all.”

You started to make yourself a coffee, all the while you could feel Sam’s gaze behind your back. You tried to ignore it, but eventually you sat your mug down and turned to face him.

“What is it Sam?” you asked.

“Nothing,” he answered, averting his eyes to his lap embarrassed at having been caught out. “Just… I know I said it before, but I’m really sorry about what happened.”

You nodded in understanding, and walked over to him. He stood, and you enveloped each other in a hug.

“You have nothing to be sorry for Sam, I’m the one who stepped in front of you remember?”

“Yer to save me!” he replied, pulling back to look at you. “If I’d been paying closer attention-”

“The other vamp would have got ya,” you cut him off. “To see the one with the gun you would have had to turn away from the vamp that was trying to rip out your jugular vein. I don’t regret what I did Sam, I’d do it again.”

“You nearly died,” he added quietly, and you frowned.

“So I’m told. Dean also told me you donated some blood to top me up?”

Sam nodded and you smiled. “OK, so we’re even. Now forget about it and let me make my coffee, ok?”

“Yer alright. But hey,” he added, taking your hand as you started to walk away from him, pulling you back. “Two things. One, listen to Dean ok? I don’t want you getting hurt again.”

You sighed and rolled your eyes. “Yes, ok big bro, and what’s number two?”

“For what it’s worth, I think you and Dean would be really great together.”

He smiled as you stared at him like a cow looks at an oncoming train. “Wh, wha, wh-”

Sam opened his mouth to answer you but Dean’s shuffling form and groan as he woke up promptly ended the conversation. You went back to making your coffee, your mind buzzing over what Sam said. You had his permission… that was cool you figured. But did you have Dean’s? He kept acting like he wanted something more with you, but nothing was transpiring from it and it was driving you crazy. If your mind was buzzing before Dean stood up, topless, it was in meltdown the moment his feet touched the ground.

“I’m gonna drink my coffee in the sun,” you announced with wide eyes and a high pitch, taking your mug outside without sparing him another glance.

15 minutes later he joined you with his own mug, hair wet after obviously having had a shower. You looked up from your phone as he approached, and you felt your cheeks blush slightly as he sat down next to you on the park bench.

“Everything ok?” he asked, taking a sip of his drink.

You scoffed in response. “I’m fine. Dandy. How was the hunt last night?”

“I am sorry about that Y/N, in hindsight you probably could have helped,” he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face tiredly. “It was simple even for a salt and burn.”

“Nah, don’t sweat it. Got some pizza, watched some tellie… was a good night,” you told him with a smile, trying to let him know there were no hard feelings. He nodded and a weight seemed to be lifted off his shoulder.

“So, we caught wind of a possible demon possession in Texas. Thought perhaps you could give us a hand on that one if you felt up to it?”

You beamed as you nodded your head furiously, and Dean laughed. He offered his hand, which you took, and guided you back to the room to pack and get on the road.

--------------------------------------

“Are we there yet?” you whined from the backseat for the 5th time. You’d managed to convince Dean that the mountain of pillows was overkill, and you were graciously sitting back in the seat watching the world pass you by through the window. Sam groaned and you chuckled.

“Sorry sorry, I’ll stop,” you promised with a smirk. Leaning forward, you rested your head on your arms as you laid them across the seat in front of you. “Seriously though, are we very far away? Feels like we’ve been driving for days.”

“Pretty much yer,” Dean told you, pulling off the highway. “The town centre is only 10 or so minutes away.”

You breathed a sigh of relief and sat back, feeling your stitches pull as you did. You absentmindedly rubbed them as you looked out the window, wondering if you’d ever feel normal again. Dean warned you in the hospital that having your spleen removed, and recovering from a punctured lung, was going to take some time to recover from. Not only that, but you would be more susceptible to issues in the future. You could be sent packing from a simple case of the flu and that idea admittedly scared you a little; as a hunter you were prepared to go down in the blaze of glory, not from a head cold.

The air around you relaxed as you pulled into the motel, everyone anxious to get out and have a stretch. Sam got the bags again while Dean checked you all in, and soon you were gathered around the dining table figuring out the next step to catching this demon.

-------------------------

“To us,” you cheered, clinking the neck of your beer bottle against Sam and Dean’s.

“I can’t believe I’m letting you have a beer,” Dean grumbled as he took a sip of his own and you laughed.

“Pretty strong use of the word ‘let’ there Dean,” Sam chimed in. “Pretty sure she was having a drink no matter what you said.”

You simply stuck your tongue out teasingly at the older Winchester as you took a sip. “I’ll be a good little girl and only have the one, if that makes you feel better?”

Dean only nodded in response, but you caught a glimpse of the corners of his mouth pulling up into a small smile.

“I can’t believe you managed to get through a case on research duty alone Y/N,” Sam told you incredulously, and you shrugged. “I was certain you’d turn up during the fight, guns a’blazing.”

“Well, what can I say, Doctor’s orders,” you told him, winking at Dean and gently tapping his foot with your own. “I am feeling much better though.”

You and Sam looked at Dean expectantly, and as he felt your gaze on him he cleared his throat and put his beer down.

“You do seem to be moving around alright,” he admitted, and as he saw a spark light in your eyes he grinned. “I think I can safely say you’re ready for the next hunt.”

You cheered loudly and high fived Sam, before reaching into your pocket and pulling out a $5 note to hand him. Dean looked confused and his brother shrugged.

“I told her you’d cave.”

A/N: Sorry guys, not sure there’ll be a part 3 to this. I had intended to make it a trilogy but I’m having serious trouble coming up with a next part and it’s been mooooonths! I hope you enjoy it for what it is though :)

Shot Through The Heart pt 2 requested by @mannls & @muchamusedaboutnothing

Tag Lists (Open)

“Dean/Jensen” taglist: @lilydarcy (won’t tag *SOB*), @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk, @perpetualabsurdity

“Everything” taglist: @angelsandwinchesters, @grace-for-sale, @growningupgeek, @iamnotsaneatall, @nanie5, @waywardasfudge, @ronja-uebrick, @im-dead-inside05, @julzdec, @adoptdontshoppets, @meghanbeinghappy, @sleepylunarwolf , @sammysgirl1997, @imaginationisgrowth

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uruhabuns · 6 years ago

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it’s all about the foundation (fem!makeup artist!reader x ruki) (part 1)

A/N: so i’ve been toying with this idea for a while, and after reading true beauty i finally had the guts to write it out LMAO also this is my first dot-point scenario, so I tried to keep it as to-the-point as possible. I hope you guys enjoy!!

_________

(Part 2) / (Part 3)

You were an assistant makeup artist at DeepEnd, and you usually work with KPOP idols when they have promotions in Japan

You were an expert at everything to do with idol makeup (especially glitter, gradients, and dewy looks)

Since you were younger than the senior makeup artists and stylists, you had to stick with being an assistant and helping them

If you were to do makeup, you were never allowed do a full face; either base or eyes or lips

One day kaolu frantically called into management saying that his assistant was deathly sick and needed someone QUICK.

Because guess what

That day was GazettE’s tour final

And coincidentally it was your day off

So your phone went berserk at 6am while you were sleeping

WHAT THE HELL DO THESE GUYS WANT

“H--”

“Sorry to wake you up so early, ______-san, but Kaolu urgently needs an assistant today. Can you help out?”

You wanted to throw your phone away and say no, but that extra cash sounded v tempting, so you accepted.

You knew of Kaolu and that he works with bands and some idols, but you never talked to him because he was always busy, and the assistants don’t usually talk to other makeup artists and stylists who weren’t on their team

So when you got to the company building at 8am with all your gear, you waited nervously for Kaolu, and not knowing who you were going to work on that day

When he arrived, the two of you greeted each other formally before getting into the car to take you to the venue

Which ended up being Shin Kiba Studio Coast

During the car ride, the two of you got to know each other more, and talked about each other’s makeup styles

When you told him you usually work with kpop idols and that you usually use korean makeup brands, he literally made the 😬 face

Welp guess i brought all my stuff for nothing

So then Kaolu showed you his portfolio, so you knew what you were up for

You saw ruki and uruha’s makeup, which looked slightly intimidating because it was so smokey and heavy, and you’ve never worked with this kind of style before

Since korean makeup probably doesn’t have as much impact on the face as western brands, you probably had to use twice as much product as you usually would use

Seeing your reaction, Kaolu told you not to worry bc he would be doing most of the work, and that Ruki and Uruha’s features make it easier to do this type of makeup

When you guys arrived at the venue, he lead you to the makeup room where all the GazettE members and the other makeup artists were waiting

“Sorry we’re late, my assistant called in sick last minute so we had to get another one”

They understood and began to work

You tagged along behind Kaolu to wait for his instructions

“______-san, this is Ruki and Uruha,” he introduced, “Don’t be shy~”

As soon as Ruki saw someone unfamiliar who wasn’t their usual assistant, he immediately noticed how cute and pretty you were

Judging from your makeup and style, he guessed that you probably never worked with visual kei before

You saw the two males, who were already in costume, and bowed, greeting them shyly, to which they returned the greeting.

Kaolu then instructed you to start with Ruki’s base makeup, and to use his makeup products rather than yours, because he felt that yours wouldn’t last as long as his

You had to comply, so you nodded, and took a bottle of hand sanitiser and some hair clips from your duffle bag to start

You sat down in front of Ruki, taking a small breath to calm yourself down

Ruki only smirked softly when he saw how shy you were

He observed the slight blush on your cheeks, the soft brown that coloured your eyebrows, and the glitter on your aegyosal and eyelids that complimented your pinkish coral gradient lips; your makeup style was exactly how he preferred on girls -- fresh and pretty, rather than dramatic and heavy.

You applied the sanitiser onto your hands, rubbing it dry

You brushed his bangs to each side of his face, and clipped them back with the hair clips

When you did so, Ruki couldn’t help but notice the subtle sweet scent of your perfume, and feel how soft the back of your fingers were when they brushed against his forehead

That’s when he decided to start talking. “So...are you new here?”

You nodded. “To visual kei, I am. But I usually work with kpop idols when they come to Japan.”

“Sorry, I meant to DeepEnd.”

“Oh! No, I’ve been here for a year.”

“A young one, then, huh?”

You smiled shyly, and tucked your hair behind your ear, something you usually do when you get shy. “I graduated beauty school last year, but I like to do my own styles too.”

As you reached for the primer that was next to Kaolu as he was working on Uruha, Ruki smirked at how cute you were.

You then asked him if he applied anything before coming to the venue

He said only moisturiser

You then told him you had to refresh his skin because it might have accumulated dust and dirt while he travelled to the venue, so you took out a cotton pad and a bottle of Etude House skin freshener, and sprayed it onto the pad.

Just as you were about to put it on Ruki’s face, Kaolu immediately fREAKED as he was working on Uruha’s base makeup

“______! I said to just do the base!”

His reaction caught the attention of the other members too

You froze in your seat. “W-we usually do this with idols before doing their make-”

“He already applied skincare, don’t try to wipe anything off.”

You chewed on your lower lip and nodded. “I understand. I’m sorry.”

You put the bottle back into your bag and threw the cotton pad into the bin.

“Yo, it’s her first time doing makeup for us. You don’t have to be so hard on her.” Ruki defended you.

He couldn’t help but feel bad for you for being scolded during your first time doing visual kei makeup

You grabbed the MAC makeup base, and pumped it a few times onto the back of your hand.

“Thank you...” you said quietly, careful to avoid eye contact with Ruki.

“It’s nothing. I know it’s hard, but for now just do what your senpais tell you, even if you have better ways to do things. I’ve been there before.”

You nodded and dabbed some primer onto your ring finger, applying it by delicately tapping it evenly across Ruki’s face -- a new technique that he hadn’t come across with Kaolu before that didn’t make his skin feel like it was pulled on

Ruki felt the awkwardness in the air, so he decided to make a conversation with you to make you more comfortable working.

“I guess idol makeup technique is different to visual kei technique, huh?”

You nodded softly. “Y-yes...”

“How so?”

“Everything has to look fresh and clean and flawless. That’s why I needed to clean your face first. After that I would apply essence and moisturiser anyway...”

“Ah...”

You took out your trusty beauty blender and freshening mist from your gear bag, and sprayed the mist onto the sponge.

You squeezed the sponge a few times to let it absorb the mist before spraying again. You repeated this until the sponge was damp enough to be able to blend without absorbing product.

Ruki watched you as you did so, observing your delicate hands, before you began to blend out the primer on his face

After that, you applied Kaolu’s concealer and matte foundation in the same way; spread by tapping with the ring finger, then gently blending out with the beauty blender

Ruki couldn’t help but feel his heart race a bit more every time you came close to him

The smell of your perfume, the feel of your gentle touch, and the sight of your flushed cheeks kicked his senses up several notches

NO THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!!!

Before he knew it, you were already done with Ruki’s foundation makeup

His skin looked flawless and perfectly matte, and felt fresher with less layers of foundation and powder than how Kaolu would usually do it.

Huh...must be idol technique...Ruki thought, She is really good.

“Kaolu-san, I’m done.”

He went over to Ruki to check your work

“Perfect, _______-san. You did well.”

“She did a great job,” Ruki added, “My face doesn’t feel like a cake, either.”

You couldn’t help but blush slightly at the compliments, feeling accomplished since you’ve never worked with these guys before.

“Great. _______, you can take a break, just come back in half an hour.”

“Thank you. I will.” you said, beginning to make your way out of the room with your handbag.

“Also, I’d hate to ask, but is it okay if you could grab a coffee for me on your way back? There’s a Starbucks nearby the venue. I’ll pay you back.”

You nodded, half-reluctantly. “Of course.”

Once you left the room, Uruha began to tease Ruki.

“I see you.”

“What?”

“Are you really trying to play dumb?”

“Says the actual dumb one. What are you even talking about?”

“You like her, don’t you?”

Ruki flinched at the assumption. “What? Are you out of your mind? You out of all people should know I don’t do love at first sight.”

“RUKI LIKES SOMEONE?!” Reita yelled from the other side of the room, causing his makeup artist to scold him to sit down and stay still.

“Wait, since when did Ruki have crushes on people?” Aoi added.

“I never said I liked anyone!! Geez!”

Uruha smirked in amusement. “It’s been a while since someone made you feel this way, huh? I saw the way you looked at her. I didn’t know you were into the cute girls now.”

“Doesn’t his type always change?” Kai asked with amusement. “How old is she, anyway?”

“Too young for him, obviously.” Aoi replied with a laugh.

“WOAH, HE LIKES THE YOUNG ONES NOW?!” Reita exclaimed, “Why don’t you ever tell us these kinds of things?”

By then, Ruki had enough. “SHUT UP!! You guys are talking fucking nonsense. I have no time for girls or relationships.”

The other members only snorted to contain their laughter.

Uruha lightly poked Ruki’s arm. “Sure, keep telling that to yourself. But if you do end up dating her, or someone like her, don’t break her heart. She seems too innocent for someone like us.”

For the first time in what felt like forever, Ruki felt something spark inside him - a feeling he had learnt to forget.

#the gazette #mine.#the gazette scenario #ruki #ruki scenario #i hope this was okay :'))#will write part two soon!!#i'm sleepy af adjskgfh

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unvillges · 7 years ago

Text

Fools | Chapter 6

Pairing: min yoongi x ofc

Summary: min yoongi is a world famous producer and needs an assistant to help him out, but what he got was much more

Word Count: 4,952

Authors Note: this chapter was supposed to be a short filler chapter but ended up becoming on of the longest and one of my favorites! i hope you enjoy it just as much as i do!

fools masterlist

The weekend approached quickly after than night with Yoongi, I had woken up the next morning completely confused as to where I was but was happily greeted with a cup of coffee and then a stack of things to do, heading back to my normal work day. But it was finally the weekend and I could relax, even if Yoongi couldn’t. He had a knack for staying in the studio even when he knew he shouldn’t, usually sending me a few texts about the things he was working on, this weekend didn’t seem to be much different.

Yoongi (10:15am)

I need you to make a trip out of town with me tomorrow.

It was the message that flashed on my screen with his name attached to it, causing me to stop what I was doing. I wasn’t going to lie, despite being work related it was nice to hear from him. I quickly pick up my phone and sent a message back, letting my fingers tap against the glass.

To: Yoongi (10:15m)

Cool, where we heading? Europe? Somewhere expensive and relaxing?

I laugh at myself before hitting send, hoping that he found my words just as funny as I did. Before I can even lock my phone the three little dots popped up, letting me know he was replying back.

Yoongi (10:15am)

Yes, actually. We have a dinner planned on the top of the Eiffel Tower and then we’re going to take a gondola ride in Venice right before we watch the sunrise in Barcelona.

Do u think they pay me enough for Europe?

I laugh again, this time at his response, shaking my head as I texted back. I didn’t realize he could be this calm and fun. We usually have a tense work relationship, the dinner earlier this week was a different side that I had never seen, it was nice to get to know this other side of him.

To: Yoongi (10:16m)

That Rolex on your wrists says otherwise!!!!!

But, okay, where are we going?

Yoongi (10:16am)

Ok you’re right….

Anyway

LA, there’s a big meeting going on and I need you to be there

To: Yoongi (10:16m)

Only if the hotel room is free

Yoongi (10:16am)

Why wouldn’t it be?

To: Yoongi (10:17m)

Maybe you were getting cheap on me, how am I supposed to know?

Yoongi (10:17am)

Oh my gosh, the company is paying

To: Yoongi (10:17m)

Then it’s free

Yoongi (10:17am)

Yes

To: Yoongi (10:17m)

Then I will accommodate you

Yoongi (10:18am)

You didn’t have much of a choice

To: Yoongi (10:18m)

There’s always a choice, Yoongi.

Where there’s a will, there’s a way

Yoongi (10:18am)

I don’t think that’s what that means

Also, Hoseok will be joining us as well

I know you two are “pals”

To: Yoongi (10:18m)

“Pals”????

Why the quotes

Yoongi (10:20am)

You guys are all buddy buddy now but I don’t know how deep it is.

So….

“Pals”

To: Yoongi (10:20m)

Uh oh is someone jealous??

Yoongi (10:20am)

Of you and Hoseok? You have a better chance of that trip I promised before

To: Yoongi (10:20m)

:( That’s just mean

Yoongi (10:21am)

Yeah, yeah

Anyway we leave for the airport tomorrow at 6am, I have your ticket

See you then.

I laugh once more before putting my phone down thinking about the upcoming trip I was just informed of. First, the wave of anxiety of not having anything packed hit me quickly causing me to get up and start to get everything together. Although I knew it was still early in the day I knew that if I tried to do it late at night that I’d probably just lay on my bed scrolling on my phone instead of even attempting to pack and then I’d rush wake up before I had to leave for the airport to pack and I’d be late – it’s usually how my other trips went.

I figured we wouldn’t have much time for tourist-y type of things, but I had never been to Los Angeles before, actually I had never been outside the East Coast so it was pretty special and exciting. It was the only thing I could think about the whole day, my parents probably getting tired of my chatter about it as we spent the day together.

“Just be safe.” My mom reminds me after we finish dinner, my hands busy drying the now clean plates from any water that was still on them. “That’s all we ask, but we’re excited.” She reminds me with a soft smile. “Does Dad have to drop you off at the airport?”

“I’m actually not sure.” I say as I finish the last one and put it back into the cabinet. “I don’t know if they’ll call a car or if I have to drive myself, I’ll let you guys know before I go to bed.” I give them a soft smile before heading upstairs and into my room. It was tough being twenty-two and still living at home, while I still loved and appreciated my family I missed the freedom that I had in college. But, a house I don’t have to pay for with my loving parents wasn’t something I’d trade, I was right out of college I still needed time to work and save some money.

I find myself back in my room and laying down on my bed when I take out my phone, opening it up to send Yoongi a quick text.

To: Yoongi (6:45pm)

So what’s the deal for tomorrow?

Yoongi (6:45pm)

Well, you’re going to get on a plane

And fly to California

To: Yoongi (6:46pm)

Well I know that!

I meant like ride to the airport

Do I have one?

What time should I leave?

Yoongi (6:46pm)

6am is when you leave

Hoseok and I can come pick you up, we’re taking a car

To: Yoongi (6:47pm)

Are you sure?

Yoongi (6:47pm)

Yes

Just be ready on time please

We will be there at 6am sharp

To: Yoongi (6:47pm)

THANK YOU!!!!!

A swift thumbs up emoji was sent before our conversation ended leaving me to finish packing some last minute items before I went to sleep to try to get some type of rest before my flight in the morning. By the time my eyes had shut it felt like no time had passed before they were open again, groaning as I shut my alarm off trying not to think about how early I was up. I got ready quickly, I made sure I looked decent enough for the airport before heading downstairs and waiting for the car to arrive. I tried my best not to wake my parents, knowing well that despite my quiet footsteps I could easily wake them up.

Yoongi (5:57am)

Will be there in 3

Are you up?

To: Yoongi (5:57am)

Yes

I’ll see you soon.

Despite the rush of waking up and getting together quickly, my body was extremely tired and it was hard for me to keep my eyes open even as the lights of the car pulled into my driveway signaling that they were here. Hoseok, as the gentleman he was, hopped out of the car when I got there and took my bags, giving me a slight side hug before he threw my bags into the trunk so I could get into the car, finding myself sitting in between Hoseok and Yoongi. His eyes were shut, head leaning onto the window next to him as he blasted some music through a pair of headphones. It was obvious that Hoseok slamming the trunk shut woke him up, his heavy eye lids finding their way over to my face as he’s trying to recognize the setting that he’s in.

“Good morning,” I say and he raises an eyebrow which makes me realize that while he can read my lips the music blasting in his ears probably blocked off what I was saying. He carefully peels back the bulky set and looks back over at me. “I said good morning, since you just woke up.” He gives me a lazy smile as his head tilts up a bit took look at me properly.

“Good morning and good night, I’m going to back to sleep.” He laughs before his eyes shut again, his hand moving to put his headphone back. I find myself doing the same and drifting off to as good of a slumber that I could for being stuck in a car for an hour.

“We’re here!!” Hoseok’s sing-song voice startled me awake, making me come to my sense quickly. My head was laying on Yoongi’s shoulder, tilting my head slightly to look up at him, his eyes completely open and staring out the window as if he didn’t even realize I was laying on him. I picked my head up and let out a yawn, looking away from him as Hoseok opened the door and we slid out of the back seat.

“Alright, come get your bags!” Hoseok said in a too-loud-for-this-early voice as he took the bags from the drivers hands and passed them out to each of us. I rolled my eyes and thanked him as he handed me mine, waiting patiently for them to be done. I looked over at Yoongi for a second, his eyes were shut as his arm rested on the handle of his suitcase that was perched up. “Come on.” Hoseok slaps his arm which causes his eyes to jolt open. “We’re going.”

For it being this early in the morning the airport was packed which actually left us pressed for time to get to the actual flight, which lucky for us we made it right before the gate closed. I had been on a plane before, but only a few times and they weren’t long but this one wasn’t much different, and although it wasn’t the first class experience I was hoping our company would pay for, it was relaxing. Yoongi’s laptop was out, his headphones in as it looked like he was mixing something together, Hoseok sat in between us and unlike his friend he wasn’t trapped away doing work or sleeping, instead trying to have a conversation with me without annoying the other passengers.

“Are you excited?” He asked when we were preparing to land, a warm smile on his face. “This is your first time, right?”

“I’m so excited.” I respond as I take a sip of my water bottle. “But what’s the schedule like?”

“Today is going to be a relaxing day.” He says as he takes a quick look at the time on his phone. “Tomorrow we have to be up and have small meetings starting at 8 and ending at around 6-7PM, so we’re going to need you to stay near, get food, things like that. Maybe even take notes if he’s feeling ambitious enough to ask you.” I laugh and nod my head. “Then the next day we’re going into the LA studio for a bit, there’s some people we need to meet with for some possible collaborations and this is their only free week and then we have a flight back home that night. You’ll pretty much be on call.”

“Don’t really have a choice, do I?” I tease which makes him send a wink back at my words before we both start chuckling. The connection I had with this job was weird, and the connection I had with Yoongi was even weirder. There were times where I would catch him staring at me or he would find himself in my office trying to ask my questions that I had answered multiple times already. Things weren’t flirting on more than a boss-employee relationship but sometimes it felt like he wanted it to be or was trying to make it that way. But, by the same token, there were times where he would just ignore me, act as if I wasn’t even in the room or that he didn’t even realize I existed and it was confusing.

I would be lying if I said I didn’t find him somewhat attractive, the way his shaggy dark hair often overlapped his eyelids, making him sweep it back with a hat and leaving it messy underneath. When he would laugh his whole face lit up, his eyes shutting and crinkling up his nose as the sweet sound left his lips, sometimes it made my heart skip a beat but I always brushed it off as just being surprised. If I really thought about it, things were different from the first time we had met and the time we had spent together but I always just pegged it as him being more comfortable with me being his employee. Maybe I was reading the signs wrong, or, of course, maybe I was just thinking way too into this. And it continued to flood my mind until we got off the plane, taking another car to the hotel we were staying at. My brain found a way to shut off these thoughts and focus on the beautiful city that was passing before my very own eyes. It was still early in the morning, the sun barely rising in the sky, but still leaving a unbelievable hue on everything that it touched.

“Pretty right?” Hoseok asked as he elbowed my side, I didn’t have to look at him to know that there was a huge smile on his face. “I was blown away the first time I saw it too.”

Things were just different than they were in New York, it didn’t have this feeling of darkness over it even on the brightest of days. It felt warm and light, the way that the palm trees moved ever so slightly in the breeze, and how the sun radiated off the clear water breaking apart into small stars across the waves. It was breath taking.

“Do you remember that?” Hoseok asks making you look over to see him looking at Yoongi. “Our first time here? It feels like it was so long ago.” He wasn’t wearing his headphones as I thought he would be, you know his usual tactic of isolation, instead he was staring out of the window next to him and taking in the view just as much as I was.

“Yeah, when we decided to try to sneak onto the beach at 4am with that bottle of vodka that you bought and got the cops called on us?” Yoongi snickers which then makes Hoseok erupt in laughter as well.

“Well that, but I just meant how young we were and how blown away we were by everything.” They both laugh again, my attention being snatched away by the ocean as we drove past it, letting them continue to talk about the past. I had never heard them laugh so hard other than now when they were exchanging stories and it made me excited for the day we had in store, and the fact that maybe we could make some memories of our own.

Hours passed and while I wanted to go out and explore LA, my body decided to shut down the second I got into my hotel room taking a nap until I woke up and the sun was starting to set. I rolled over and looked at my phone, just flipping through some texts from my parents before seeing that I had what felt like a million from Hoseok and Yoongi.

Hoseok (5:45pm)

Yo yo yo, anyone awake?

Yoongi (5:45pm)

Working

What

Hoseok (5:45pm)

Of course you are

Where’s Lili?

Yoongi (5:45pm)

Idk, sleeping?

What do u want

Hoseok (5:45pm)

Attitude

Do you want to get dinner

Yoongi (5:46pm)

Idk, sleeping?

No, working

Hoseok (5:46pm)

You have to eat at some point

Come on!!!

Yoongi (5:46pm)

Just bring me something back

Hoseok (5:46pm)

…

Yoongi (5:46pm)

What

Hoseok (5:47pm)

…

Yoongi (5:47pm)

What!!!

Hoseok (5:47pm)

…

Yoongi (5:47pm)

PLEASE bring me something back

Hoseok (5:47pm)

There we go

Should I wait to see until Lili wakes up?

Yoongi (5:47pm)

Lol

Sure if you want

The last message came in as I was reading the other ones so I assumed he hadn’t left yet, texting back the group chat as quickly as possible.

To: YOONGI & HOSEOK (5:47pm)

I just woke up and could definitely use some food

Hoseok (5:48pm)

YESSSS

What are you in the mood for?

My treat

To: YOONGI & HOSEOK (5:48pm)

Anything!!

Hoseok (5:48pm)

Awesome okay

Yoongs you sure you don’t want to come

Yoongi (5:48pm)

Yep

Have fun

Hoseok (5:48pm)

Alright Lili I’m on my way to your room

I put my phone down and just fixed myself up quickly to make sure that I looked presentable for dinner. A knock at the door captured my attention and I opened it up to see Hoseok standing there a smile on his face.

“You look well rested,” he laughs as I move to join him in the hallway, letting my hotel door close behind me. “Ready to go?”

“Ready as I will ever be.” I give him a smile before we head out to the streets of LA. As we walked and talked I couldn’t help but take in the sights of the city once more, just trying to take it in with my only free day that I have. I can’t help but miss Yoongi in a weird way now that he’s not with us, even though he was usually quiet and didn’t really add much to the conversation it was like a piece of the puzzle was gone.

We got to the restaurant which was only a few blocks away and got seated quickly. We decided to sit outside on the patio rather than inside, and it was a good choice. From where I was sitting I could see the sun setting behind the buildings of the city. The patio itself was situated nicely, the tables were close together but above us dangled these dim lights that were woven through ivy, welcome the nights presence with ease.

“Thanks for coming out with me.” Hoseok says as we open our menus, giving me a smile. I tug the sweater around me tighter and give him a soft smile. “Usually when it’s the two of us, Yoongi just sits in his room and I have to go out by myself. It’s not a lot of fun.”

“Why doesn’t he come out?” I ask, although I’m not sure if it’s overstepping my boundaries or not, but Hoseok’s shrug makes me think maybe he doesn’t even know the true answer.

“He’s really into his work, obviously, and I don’t think he ever takes a break. When we were younger we had more fun, but I guess the time for that is over with now. You know? Sometimes I wish he didn’t, I wish someone could show him that things don’t have to always be work. There’s work time and then there’s real life.” He mumbles something after that I can’t quite pick up on but I don’t bother to him to repeat it, if he wanted me to hear it I would have been able to. “Maybe you can help him out.” He offers as he reaches to the middle of the table and grabs a piece of bread from the basket.

“How do you suggest I do that?” I ask, raising my eyebrow as I grab the glass of wine in front of me, taking a sip of it I wait for an answer.

“Make his studio less inviting, start putting stuff he hates in it.”

“Ha!” I laugh as I hold the glass in my hand. “As if he’d even let me in there.”

“You’re still not allowed in? How does he expect you to do anything?” He asks, but all I can do is shrug which makes the red liquid swirl around slightly in my glass. “This kid is going to kill both of us, you know?”

We laugh and the conversation moves on, but my mind stays on the topic. I always wondered why he wouldn’t let me into his studio, what was so important that he could be locking away. He always quickly closed the door when I appeared in the hallway, either locking himself in the four walls or standing in front of the door and protecting what was ever in there.

Deep down I couldn’t help but just think that it was because that was where he poured his heart and his soul, the place where he could bare everything into his music, maybe even the sheer idea of someone he didn’t know too well stepping into that space could very much show way too much. More than he wanted. But this was all speculation, I had no idea for sure and I sure as hell wasn’t going to be finding out anytime soon – although I wanted to.

I wanted to be able to feel trusted enough in my own job to not overstep my boundary when it came to Yoongi, I wanted him to know that I was there to help him, not out to get him as he might think, but I knew that changing someone’s mind like that would be hard. I could tell with the nervous glances I would get whenever I would walk into the break room and he was typing on his phone, what I could only assume was lyrics for a new song. It was obvious enough he didn’t trust me or think I was capable but I didn’t know how to break that barrier and I still wasn’t sure.

It was after the waitress took our order that his phone started buzzing on the table, his eyes narrowing slightly as he read the name before picking it up. He spoke softly and with his head turned away from me, it was either something business related or personal so I entertained myself with my own phone to not seem rude of trying to listen in – although I was most definitely trying to listen.

“Ok, ok, ok, bye.” He hung up and put the phone down, I followed his actions a few moments later. I could clearly see the look on his face, it was one of confusion but a few seconds later a smile plastered on as I could tell he wasn’t looking at me, but past me. My head turned to see where he was looking and all I could see was Yoongi walking over to our table, a soft smirk on his features as he looked down at us.

“Mind if I join?” He asked in a soft voice, obviously embarrassed at Hoseok’s sheer joy at his presence. But, he wasn’t lucky enough to get out of it just yet as a few moments later his friend stood up and wrapped his arms around him, giving him a hug as he teased Yoongi, which got Hoseok nothing but a disapproving head shake as the two sat back down.

He had changed from the dark clothes I had seen him in early this morning. Every ounce of darkness that were woven into his usual black jeans was replaced for a blue denim pair, the holes that covered them intricately placed throughout. His usual dark sweatshirt was now a more vibrant red button down that was hoisted over a black and white striped shirt, but his signature black hat still sat on top of his head. Apparently Los Angeles changed the quiet boy into a more vibrant dresser, and although the clothes seemed to be different on him he seemed to be enjoying it.

“Isn’t someone very vibrant today?” Hoseok responds, is hand moving to touch Yoongi’s red shirt. “Feeling the weather?”

“I got it last time we were here, remember? I thought it’d be a nice change and…” his voice trails off for a moment. “I kind of forgot LA isn’t as cold as New York, so the only other things I brought were big fucking sweatshirts.” He laughs.

I noted at how easily the curse word rolled off his tongue. It’s not that he hadn’t cursed in the office before, it was usually a ‘fuck this’ or a ‘fuck that’ or a ‘I can’t get this fucking beat’ throughout the day, but those were frustrations coming out.

“What made you want to come? It had to be my very great persuasive skills.” Hoseok asks, his eyebrows wiggling as he speaks.

“Uhh…” Yoongi chuckles and shakes his head, his eyes moving to look from Hoseok and over to me, staring at me for a moment as he thinks of a response to his friend’s question. “No.” He responds, his gaze quickly moving back. “I decided that I was too hungry to sit around and wait. I knew I wouldn’t hear the end of it if I decided to go somewhere else and you guys found out, so you’re welcome.”

“I’m glad you came.” I find myself stumbling out the words before I can figure out what I’m saying and I can feel two pair of eyes staring at me. I quickly take a sip of my wine to try to stop myself from saying anything else. Yoongi didn’t look away now, he just kept looking at me as I sipped for a few moments before putting the glass back down on the table. “I didn’t want you to feel left out is all.” I try to clarify my statement but I wasn’t sure if I was doing it for them or for me at that point, to try to clear up what my own words meant, even if I wasn’t too sure.

“I didn’t feel left out, but thank you.” He gives me a warm smile, the corners of his lips tugging up slightly. His smiles were rare but they were calming as if they were trying to reassure you that everything was going to be okay.

And everything was, or at least in the moment with the three of us it felt like it was. I knew deep down it was a job and that the two boys I was with at the time were just people I worked with, but a part of me couldn’t help but feel a little bit differently.

The rest of the evening goes on well, we eat our food and have a nice time even after the sunset for good and the darkness took over the city I was soon finding out was another place I would come to love as much as home. We sat, ate, drank and talked for what seemed like hours and maybe it was, no one had been keeping time.

“Man, that was a fun time.” Hoseok said as we got off the elevator to the floor we were staying on. “Get some sleep, guys, night!” He calls out as he quickly heads into his room which happens to be before mine and Yoongi’s, the two of us waving before he disappears.

“Did you have a good time?” He asks as he wanders, stopping right in front of the door to his suite.

“I did, did you?”

“I did. I never really get out when I’m out here, it was a nice time.” He explains before things fall silent, he avoids my gaze, looking down at the key card in his hand as we both lean against either side of the frame of the door, standing a foot or less apart. “We have to be up early tomorrow.”

“Can’t you go five seconds without talking about work?” I ask with a bit of a chuckle, my hand moving up to rest on his shoulder. “I got the itinerary email already this morning, I know.” He chuckles softly as he looks up at me through his eyelashes, not fully picking his head up. “I’ll be there.” I say as I let my arm drop back down at my side.

“You sound like Hoseok.”

“We’ve talked about this before.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it. He cares.”

“He wants you to have fun.”

“I have fun.”

“You’re twenty-five and you’ve been out to eat once this month…with me and it was a few days ago.”

“You’re making it sound like it’s a bad thing.”

“I’m making it sound like it’s an unhealthy thing.” He licks his bottom lip as he picks his head up, letting out a sigh as I speak. “Why did you really come out tonight?” I ask after a few moments of silence and I can tell by the question it’s something that maybe he wasn’t hoping to answer.

“Maybe I just wanted to hang out with you, is that so bad? And Hoseok.” He adds his friends name in quickly. “And Hoseok.” He repeats once more. “You guys did invite me out if you remember correctly.”

“Actually he did, I was just promised free food.”

“You secretly wanted me there too.”

“Says who?” My eyebrow raises slightly.

“Says me.” He takes a step forward, now towering over me. His hands stay by his side but for a moment, one split second, I swore I could see them twitch forward as if they wanted to reach out and grab my own.

“You know, we have to be up early tomorrow.” My quick response causes a smirk to land on his features, shaking his head at the fact that his own words were being used against him. “Goodnight, Yoongi.”

“Goodnight, Lili.”

I took a step back and waved quickly, before turning and jogging over to my room a few doors away. I couldn’t help but feel that things felt like they were starting to change and I wasn’t sure why, and I wanted to find out, and I hoped that I could.

#yoongi fic #yoongi fanfiction #yoongi ff #yoongi imagine #yoongi reaction #yoongi scenarios #yoongi scenario #bts fanfic #bts ff #bts fic #bts reaction #bts scenario #bts imagine

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prettyyoungtragedy · 7 years ago

Text

You and I, Just the two of us - Chapter 3

You and I, just the two of us - (AU!) 3

James (Bucky) x reader, – Steve x reader (Later in fic)

Summary: The reader is reeling from a life changing event; a year later can she finally move on? Or will the past come tumbling down like an avalanche…

A/N: Sooo I decided to do an AU! Its my first time writing one, I am rather excited so I sinceeeerely hope you all drop me some feedback, because I god damn love writing!!

Word Count: 5293

Warnings: Nothing bad…

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It was 6am Monday morning, you were rushing out the front door of your apartment, balancing your handbag, laptop case, and research files. You were going to be late for a meeting with Tony if you didn’t rush, and he hated tardiness.

Your phone was buzzing in your pocket repeatedly, you had to ignore it as you rush outside into the cold December morning air, and head towards the subway. Tony had offered you a company car multiple times, but you turned it down, you hated being stuck in the New York morning rush hour and the subway was more efficient in getting you to and from work.

Twenty minutes later, you walk into your lab at Stark Tower, and dump all your items on your desk.

“You have 10 minutes” Maria Hill your colleague called out to you as she walked passed, knowing you had a meeting at 6:30Am,

“Thanks Maria,” you call after her sarcastically and quickly gather up all your files and head to the elevator. When you arrived at the boardroom, Tony and Bruce were already there, discussing their latest project.

“Just in time!” Tony says when he sees you,

“Morning,” you greet them and take a seat at the table, knowing Tony had a million other things to go over so he would want to make this snappy.

Tony went over budgets and other developments with you and Bruce, and he informed you that he would be joining your divisions from the new year, saying it only made sense to have his two top researchers working in the same field just work together. You were delighted by this as you couldn’t wait to work with Bruce, he was fantastic at his job.

The meeting ends and Tony excuses himself, Bruce walks you out and back to your lab.

“So, how was the rest of your night with Steve?” He asks you,

“It was surprisingly fun,” you reply, thinking back to the lovely night you had with Steve. You had gone home and felt giddy all weekend because of you time with him, it was annoyingly fun.

“Good to hear, will you see him again?” Bruce pried

“I might,” you throw him a look, “Are you asking for Natasha?”

Bruce laughed, “ah you know how she is, she needs all the details, give her a call or she will hound me for information,” he said, shaking head,

You sighed, you loved Natasha, but she was so insistent sometimes. “I’ll text her sometime today,” you say to Bruce as you walk into the lab, “Hey, did you meet Steve before?” you ask Bruce,

“Yeah, I have met him, a few times,” Bruce replied taking a seat,

You frowned, “How come Nat never introduced us before?”

“Well with everything that you were going through she didn’t know if it was the right time,” he explained,

“Makes sense, I guess” you say,

A few more minutes of conversation with Bruce and then he excused, himself to work and you sat at your desk going through some research. You plug in your iPod and turn the volume up, whenever you worked you would immerse yourself in music,

The lab was empty as most of your colleagues were out on assignment or had stepped away from their desks. So, you hadn’t heard Maria come bustling in, practically squealing with excitement,

“Y/N, oh my god” she almost shouted in your face,

Startling you, you pull your headphones out and look up at her in confusion. She held a massive bouquet of almost 50 white roses, waving the card in your face.

“These are for you!” Maria said excitedly, handing you the card,

You hesitated for a moment, there was only one person who knew how much you loved white roses and you silently prayed that the flowers were not from Luke. Taking the card from Maria you looked at it, and immediately smiled,

‘Thank you for an amazing evening, you haven’t left my mind since’

S Grant Rogers.

“Oh my god! Y/N did you go on a date with Steve Rogers?!” Maria gasped excitedly,

You smiled wider, and just looked at her, not wanting to give anything away. “You did, oh my god, oh my god, I am freaking out for you!” She squealed grabbing your hands and jumping around with you,

“Maria, relax” you laughed, “It was a few drinks, Natasha and Bruce were there, it wasn’t a date.”

“Good god, don’t down play this! He was number 1 on Forbes list, and he is so incredibly gorgeous!” she gasped, being overly dramatic.

You laughed at her dramatics, “I don’t even know if he likes me,” you shrug, you weren’t sure if you were ready to let someone new into your life. You had only just now begun to get try and get over Luke.

Maria looked at you like you were crazy, “The man sent you 50 white roses and basically said he can’t stop thinking about you, and you aren’t sure if he likes you.” she said grabbing the card from you hard, “This is like shouting it from the rooftops!”

“Okay, okay let me get back to work,” You reply not wanting to get into this with Maria, who just sighs and then picks up the flowers

“I’ll put this in water for you,” she says, “I am so jealous!” and then she leaves.

The rest of the day goes by rather quickly, but you are unable to concentrate on work. The beautiful bouquet of white roses now displayed on your desk in front of you, all your female colleagues gushing over it when Maria told them who it was from, everyone asking relentless questions. They all knew about what had happened with Luke, and had been cautious around you since it happened, in a small way it finally felt like your life might be able to go back to normal.

As you were leaving the lab, your phone buzzed, without looking you answered it. It was James.

“Hey Y/N,” his voice sounded,

Your heart rate spiked, and you had an immediate flashback to the Sunday morning you spent in his kitchen, almost fucking.

“Oh, Hi James” you mutter,

“Well, don’t act too excited,” he said, clearly hurt by your reaction to him calling,

“Sorry, I am just leaving work, a little distracted.” You quickly apologize hiding the nervousness in your voice.

“Can we talk?” He asks solemnly over the phone,

You sighed, you couldn’t avoid him forever and you missed having him around. “Sure, meet me at my place in an hour?” you respond,

He agrees, and you end the call, the cold evening breeze blows gently on your face as you made your way to the subway station. Thinking about the past year of your life, your heart missed Luke terribly but in the last week things had changed so much, you were finally opening yourself up to moving on and it felt good, but you knew you weren’t entirely ready to jump into a new life.

When you got home, you ordered in pizzas, knowing James was going to want to get some the moment he arrived. You grab a beer from the fridge and sit on the couch flipping through the Netflix selection, mindlessly.

Half way into an episode of MindHunter, you hear the buzzer go off and you know its James,

“It’s open,” you call out,

James walks into the living room, placing his outwear on the coathanger as he does, “Hey” he says, coming over to greet you by giving you a kiss atop your head,

“Hello James,” you reply, giving him a smile, “I already ordered the pizza”

“I brought the beer,” he says, placing a 12 pack on the coffee table and taking a seat on the couch with you,

“Good thinking,” you high-five him,

It felt a little awkward between the two of you, and you could both feel it.

“So, stranger” James said looking at you with a smirk, “Why are you avoiding me?”

“I am not avoiding you,” you laugh nervously, “I have just been busy with work”

“Too busy to reply to my texts?” He quizzed raising an eyebrow,

You sighed, you couldn’t lie to him. As much as you wanted to avoid this talk you had to have it with him. Before it got any more awkward,

“Okay, look we both know what almost happened last week, and it was a moment of weakness on my part, I was lonely and sad because, well you know why, and I wasn’t thinking straight.” You say

“I was,” he replied straight-faced,

“What,” you say confused,

“I was thinking straight when I kissed you,” James said, staring you down

You shifted in your seat, your heart hammering in your chest at his confession. “Why did you kiss me,” you ask softly,

James shrugged, “Seemed like the right thing to do in the moment,” he said sort of nonchalantly,

Your mouth fell open, and you threw a pillow at him, exasperated. “Are you fucking joking?!” you yelled at him,

James chuckled, “Stop making it such a big deal Y/N, friends can kiss and fuck sometimes,”

“Oh my god, James just stop.” You groaned, covering your face with a pillow

“Why are you over thinking this, you clearly need some release, and I adore you enough to help you out,” He said heartily,

“Oh, so you are just throwing me a free bone then?” You said, glowering at him,

“Exactly, think of it like a stress reliever.” James said,

“You are making this whole situation so fucking weird,” you said, shaking your head, he was offering to sleep with you as a friend helping another friend. Were you that pent up that he noticed it, thinking about it, the last time you had sex with anyone was almost 15 months ago, before you and Luke even broke up.

“How is this weird? We have known each other for years, plus I have seen you naked so many times over the years, it’s basically the same thing,” He pointed out, “Except this time I’ll be inside you” he grinned widely, James laughed at his own comment as usual.

“Ugh don’t be vulgar, also you slept with Natasha, that is breaking the girl code.” You retort,

“Why would Natasha have to know?” he challenged,

“How can I keep this from her? You are her ex-boyfriend!” you exclaimed, “I would be a terrible friend, if I did this.”

James looked at you, a wicked smirk on his face. “Ah but you are thinking about it,” he said huskily, biting his lip.

You couldn’t help but smile at him, He was so obnoxious and carefree, it made you feel the same way. James always found a way to make light of a situation, you knew this would have serious implications, and it was a terrible idea. Something inside you wanted to sleep with him, even if it was just once, just to feel what it would be like. James looked like a spectacular lover, or so you thought.

But on the other hand, Natasha was your best friend, and this was her ex-boyfriend, even if there were no feelings involved, it would still be a disaster. You felt like you were being a really terrible person in this moment by even considering it.

Thankfully you didn’t have to respond to him as the doorbell rang. It was the pizza,

You spent the rest of the evening with James, catching up on the week you hadn’t spent together.

“Wanda is still on my case by the way, she wants to go on a date, ugh” He said grabbing another slice of cheesy pizza. He ate like a fucking horse and still looked like a Greek god.

“Why don’t you just go on the damn date,” You asked, taking a sip of the cold beer, you had just opened. You were on your fourth drink for the night, James had well surpassed you and was drinking his 6th.

“Because I don’t date,” was his reply,

You rolled your eyes, “That’s bullshit, you dated Nat and that girl from your dad’s company for a while,”

“Yeah and look how well both of those relationships turned out,” James said,

“So is the plan to just sleep around until you die?” You asked him,

James paused and took a sip of his beer, he seemed to really contemplate his answer. “Nah, when I find the right person, I’ll settle down.” He said thoughtfully,

You snorted at his comment, unable to picture him being in a serious relationship with anyone.

“Well here is to both of us finding the ONE, in the new year” You say, raising your bottle in a cheer,

He clinks his bottle against yours, “Merry fucking Christmas,” he adds for good measure, making you laugh.

______________________

The weeks went by faster than expected and it was Christmas Eve. Steve had tried to see you twice but his bust work schedule kept him travelling often, he texted you on the regular though and sent you different gifts from every location he was at.

The girls in your lab were all swooning over his gestures, weekly there were fresh flowers being delivered, and a bottle or the best prosecco when he was in Italy, Chocolates from Belgium, Cheese from Switzerland, Donuts from Canada. It was all rather excessive but nevertheless you enjoyed the attention.

Natasha had gone into full bride mode, as her wedding was now 4 months away and she needed to buckle down on the planning. She had asked you to be her maid of honor, so you had to help her shoulder the burden of planning her wedding.

Christmas Eve, you sat in her living room looking over a hundred different types of fonts, napkins and color schemes trying to help her decide.

“I really feel like we should be going the classic red roses and white way,” Nat said holding up a red rose and a white napkin, “But then I paid peach, gold and dusty pink together and suddenly everything changes.” Then lifts another trio of colors, roses and napkins to show you.

“Classic is always good,” you offer your opinion, you were so tired by now. The two of you had spent the whole day doing wedding chores and all you wanted to do was drink by this point.

Natasha examined both options, “Ok I have decided, its this one” she says holding up the peach, gold and dusty pink trio.

“Oh thank god,” you sighed,

“I know this is tiring but its my wedding, I want it to be perfect” Nat said, topping up your glass with the prosecco you had brought over,

“Hey, I’m not complaining,” you reply, thankfully drinking the crisp alcohol.

Nat examined the bottle of prosecco, “Damn, this is some seriously good prosecco,” she noted, “Steve has good taste,”

You nod in agreement; the gifts were all in wonderful taste. “So, are you going on an actual date with him ever?” Natasha asks,

“I would like to at some point, but he is always travelling”

“You better lock that down before some other hoe comes along and takes him,” Natasha joked,

“Oh god Nat, I am not looking to marry the guy,” you say swatting her shoulder

“I bet he would make a fine husband for you,” she giggled,

“That is the furthest thing on my mind right now,” you said, “My focus is finding a new apartment.”

This comment made Natasha drop her phone into her lap, and she screamed in delight. “OHMYGOD Y/N!” she practically jumped over the couch and onto you. It might not have been significant to anyone else, but you finally moving out of the apartment you and Luke had lived in together for almost 3 years meant you were finally moving on.

“I am so happy for you babe!” She said, choking back tears,

“Natasha,” you laughed, “Why are you crying?!”

“Because, I am just so happy that you are finally coming back to us,” Natasha replied wiping the tears from her eyes, “Luke really hurt you and you were so changed and I am glad that you are moving on, its time.”

You smiled at your best friend, she had always been there for you and you hadn’t realized just how much, Luke breaking up with you, affected her as well. She had been the one trying to put the pieces he had left you in back together, and it hadn’t been easy for her.

“So, apartment hunting soon?” You offer,

“Yes yes and yes!” She yelped in delight,

Just then Bruce walked in,

“What are we excited about?” he asked, placing the tray of snacks on the table. It looked amazing, Bruce always made the best food whenever you were over, he was an amazing cook.

“Y/N is looking for a new apartment!” Natasha said excitedly,

Bruce looked at you, with a stunned expression, then quickly came over and hugged you tightly. “That is amazing news Y/N!” he said happily,

“Oh shit is that the time?” Nat suddenly exclaimed looking at her watch, “Come on, we have a party to get ready for,” she said to you, dragging you to your feet and out of the living room.

You were spending Christmas Eve with Bruce and Natasha, as your family was on vacation in Bora Bora and you rarely ever saw them anyways. The couple had outdone themselves with the gifts and the food, and the company. A few friends from the office, and friends from university had shown up and you were all mingling, enjoying the alcohol that flowed freely.

You weren’t expecting James to be there as he always spent Christmas with his family in the Hamptons, but just after dinner, you saw him walk in.

“Buckyyy!” Natasha called in a sing song voice over the blaring music when she saw him, she was a little tipsy, but she looked ever so stunning, in a maroon dress that hugged her figure. Her blonde hair tumbling over her shoulders like honey.

“Hello beautiful,” James smile at her, kissing her on the cheek and falling into her embrace. He wore grey slacks, and a crisp white shirt, holding his suit jacket over his shoulder.

“Don’t you look handsome, Buckyyy” You say walking over to him, imitating the way Nat had just said his name,

James undid a few buttons on his shirt, making a face “My mother, made me dress up” he explained,

“Yeah, I am not used to you looking so…clean,” Nat said touching his hair,

You laughed, “You still look great, don’t fuss over it” then grabbed a glass of champagne off a tray of a waiter passing by and handed it to him, “Come on, you will never believe who is here,” you say to him grabbing his hand and dragging him into the party.

“Sam!” you called loudly, “Samuel Wilson!”

Sam turned around to face you, his whole face changing when he saw James, a broad smile plastered on his face.

“Well, Well Well, If it isn’t James Buchanan Barnes,” Sam said, clapping James on the shoulder and pulling him into a hug,

“No ways!” he responded, hugging Sam back, “When did you get back?”

“A couple of months back,” Sam answered, “Yeah, I’m staying in the Bronx, its feels weird being back.”

Sam was in the military, him and James used to be best friends from way back in high school. Sam was deployed 3 years ago and hadn’t been home since.

“What are you doing now? Where are you based?” James asked,

“I live here in the Bronx now,” Sam answered, “Yeah, I’m working down at the VA”

James grinned, and grabbed his friends shoulder, “Its good to see you again, Sam” he said sincerely,

You left the two of them to catch up and went to find Natasha. She was standing on the balcony talking to Bruce, they looked so in love with each other, standing in the cold moonlight. Bruce’s arms wrapped round her waist lovingly gazing into her eyes with a warm smile on his face, Nat wore a similar expression. As you watched them, you felt a dull ache in your chest, flashing back to when Luke would look at you like that.

“They’re good together,” a voice sounded right beside your ear, startling you.

“Geez, I didn’t see you there James” you hissed, swatting him away

“You smell great,” he said, smirking at you.

“Oh my god, can you not,” you hit him upside the head,

He laughs and throws his arm over your shoulders, neither of you noticed Natasha watching the two of you.

As you look around the party, your heart suddenly stops. You see Steve standing in the doorway, looking very out of place and incredibly handsome. You pull yourself out of James’ embrace and quickly make your way towards Steve, whose face lights up when he sees you. As you walk away from James’, he scowls at the man you’re walking towards, feelings of jealously unfurling in him.

“Steve! What are you doing here?” You exclaim, hugging him.

“Natasha invited me,” he replied, “wasn’t sure if I was going to make it really, I missed my flight”

“Well I’m glad you came,” you smiled at him, “I was getting a little tired of not seeing your face and only texting,” you joked,

Steve chortled, “I guess it’s a good thing I’m here then,”

You grab two glasses of champagne from a passing waiter, and hand one to him, “Come lets go say hello to Natasha before I keep you all to myself,” you kidded.

Natasha was well passed tipsy when you and Steve finally found her, Bruce was giving her water in the kitchen, attempting to sober her up a little.

“I can’t have you passing out before all you guests leave,” you hear him chastise her,

“I’m finnnnne” Natasha muttered at him, “I just won’t drink anymore champagne,”

When Bruce saw you, he sighed, relieve. “Oh thank god, Y/N, we need to sober her up, its not even midnight yet and she is wrecked.”

Natasha looked up at you from her seat, “Steeeeveee” she said loudly opening her arms for a hug,

To which Steve obliged and exchanged hello’s with both her and Bruce, “I think we should maybe get her upstairs Bruce,” you said, “She needs to just sleep this off, there’s no coming back from this level of drunk.”

“Maybe give her some more water and let her eat something?” Steve offered, and then went to go and get some for her.

Bruce sighed, knowing that he would now have to host their guests until everyone leaves, and he hated it. Natasha was always better at hosting than he was.

Just as Bruce was about to help Natasha up, Sam and James walked into the kitchen. “There you are! We’ve been looking for you,” Sam said, then he saw Natasha sitting on the floor holding her head, and looked at you and Bruce,

“She okay?” he asked,

“Yeah, she just had a little too much champagne,” you explained,

“Buuuckyyy,” Natasha crooned when she saw him, “Come sit with me,” patting the spot beside her,

James walked over to Nat and took a seat on the floor, in front of her. “Tasha, do you need a BnR?” he asked her quietly,

Bruce looked at you confused and mouthed, “BnR?”

“Boot and rally,” you explained to him,

Bruce was still confused, “Its when you throw up, get rid of the alcohol in your system so you can sober up faster,” Sam chimed in,

Bruce mad a disgusted face, “Oh god no, please don’t throw up and then go back to the party, rather just let her sleep it off.” he said,

“I just want to have fun,” Natasha grumbled, “You’re all being boring,”

Steve walked back into the kitchen holding a plate of food and a big glass of water and handed it to you,

Sam being the polite guy that he was stuck his hand out and introduced himself, “Sam Wilson,” he said, “And this is Bucky Barnes,” pointing to James

“Steve Rogers,” Steve replied shaking his hand,

“It’s James,” said James, not bothering to shake Steve’s hand or looking up from sit seat by Natasha,

You couldn’t help but feel a little annoyed with him for being so rude to Steve, but you knew that was the way James was, and nothing anyone could say would ever change that.

“Alright, lets get her to bed,” you say, thanking Steve for the food and water

James helped her to her feet and Bruce took her from him, “Come on darling, I got you.” Bruce said grasping her firmly around the shoulders and leading her out of the kitchen, hoping none of their guests would see them go upstairs.

You followed them upstairs, and helped Bruce put Natasha to bed then headed back downstairs. The party had quieted down by now, a lot of people had evidently also plied themselves with champagne and had gone home.

James, Sam, Steve and unfortunately Wanda whom you had been avoiding all night all sat in the living room now, chatting amongst themselves.

“She okay?” James asked, when you and Bruce walked back into the living room,

“Yeah, she just needs sleep,” Bruce sighed, “Let me go and say goodbye to the rest of my guests and pay the staff,” he said, raking his fingers through his hair and then walked back out.

Wanda sat next to James, trying to keep a conversation going with him while Sam watched with intrigued delight at James’ face while she did so.

You took a seat next to Steve, “So that was a short-lived party,” you say quietly to him,

“Those are the best kinds of parties,” he responds jokingly, “Natasha can really knock them back, respect to her for that.”

You can’t help but laugh because that was Nat, since high school, always the first one to pass out a party.

“So, what are we doing tonight?” Sam asks everyone looking around the room,

“Drinking,” James muttered downing his drink in front of him, Wanda was still forcing a conversation and you could see on his face he was getting impatient. You felt like of bad for her but you she was kind of annoying,

“Here here,” Sam says, downing his drink,

“I’m down with that,” you agree, downing your glass of champagne as well,

Steve looks at you with a surprised look on his face, then he grins, “I guess I have some catching up to do” he says then gets two glasses of champagne and downs them in quick succession,

Wanda not wanting to be the odd one takes a few sips of the drink in front of her, “Sorry, I can’t down my drink, I’m a bit of a lightweight.” She said,

You stand up and walked over to the bar that Nat and Bruce had, it was always fully stocked, “I think they have shots somewhere here,” you say, opening the cupboard and scanning it. Your eye fell on the bottle of tequila and you grabbed it,

“Anyone keen?” you ask them, putting the bottle on the coffee table along with a couple of shot glasses,

James was the first to agree, you poured a couple of shots and handed them to everyone, “Merry fucking Christmas,” you said, looking at James with a smile, it was an inside joke, but he got it and it made him smile.

The conversation picked up between the group easily after a few shots in, James, Sam and you reminiscing on your college days, talking shit in general.

“I’m sorry, I have to ask,” Wanda said, looking at Steve “But you’re Steve Rogers, right?”

Steve nodded with a smile,

“I am such a huge fan of your work,” She gushes excitedly, “Your Forbes cover was fantastic,”

Steve awkwardly thanks her, and Sam and James just sit back looking confused by the whole exchange.

Wanting to draw away from Wanda’s now rambling to Steve about his work, you jumped up “Let’s play some music,” you say, walking over to the Bluetooth stereo,

Surprise flits across James’ face, he knew you well enough to know you only ever danced with one person, Luke. Sam hadn’t been around during your break up, so he still knew you as the fun-loving person you used to be, and Steve didn’t really know you well enough to know how much you loved dancing.

That part of you had kind of disappeared when Luke broke up with you, and you missed it. For some reason tonight, all you wanted to do was dance.

Wanda stands up excitedly, “Yes! Please!” she enthusiastically agreed,

Sam and Steve had struck up a conversation and we heartily engrossed in it, which you were appreciative for because Sam was the only person treating Steve like a normal everyday guy.

You flip through the selection and find the song you are looking for, and hit play.

The song starts over the surround sound speakers, and you immediately loosen up, the alcohol helped. you strolled over to the bar, taking off your shoes and started making yourself another drink, swaying slightly to the beat of the music.

James came over to the bar, and began to dance with you. The two of you were so engrossed in dancing to the song you hadn’t noticed, Sam, Steve and Wanda watching you.

You had a routine with James that you used to do way back at college parties, as a party trick. You hadn’t done it in a long time but both of you still remembered it step by step, James picked you up and basically tossed you in the air, to the beat, catching you. The moment your feet touched the ground he twirled you around and then dipped you, your breath catching in your throat when you look into his ice blue eyes.

Sam and Steve both start clapping when the song ends,

“Holy shit, I can’t believe you two still remember how to do that!” Sam exclaims coming over to high five you and James,

You laughed, feeling the happiest you had felt in a while, “I haven’t done that in a while,” you mused,

“That was fantastic, you’re a great dancer,” Steve said, “Learned something new about you tonight,”

The night wore on, and the five you, Bruce included, hung around the house, chatting and enjoying each other’s company. By the end of the night, you had decided to stay over to Bruce and Natasha’s as it was almost 3 in the morning and didn’t want to take a cab home,

You stood outside saying goodnight to Steve, while Sam and James were at the door waiting for you.

“It was really good to see you again, Y/N,” Steve said, touching your shoulder.

“Likewise, we should do this again sometime,” you reply,

“Maybe with less people?”

You smiled at him, you really liked Steve, but you knew it would never work between the two of you. not with his lifestyle, at best it would be a really great fling to tell at parties some day you thought.

“Yeah, text me.” You say, then he kisses you on the cheek and bids you goodnight.

As you walk back into the house, Sam starts teasing you almost immediately, “Ooooh he’s got a crush on youuu” he mocks,

“Shut up Sam,” You said whacking him on the arm, James is silent on the matter.

He laughed and the three of you headed inside, to a respective room to catch some much-needed sleep.

This had been one of the best Christmas Eve’s you’d had in a long time.

Tags: @addictionmarvel

#Steve Rogers #steve x reader #au!steve rogers #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #au!bucky #au!bruce #au!natasha #natasha romanoff #bruce banner #sam wilson #marvel fic #fanfiction #fanfic

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themiddlelayer · 5 years ago

Text

Okay, Universe...I hear you!

When I was in the process of leaving Tampa people would ask me how I was doing. My answer was that I was getting things done but my meltdown was scheduled for February 15th so I’d have enough discounted chocolate to get me through it. I was mostly joking, but apparently Universe was listening attentively and granted my wish.

Dinner with Puppy on Thursday went well, bad food and crappy service aside. My work day had been productive and I’d initially planned on meeting Subby Soldier for coffee and a movie Friday night but he ended up with overnight duty. I was bummed but decided that doing Galentine's Day with Cookie was a great plan.

I was craving my mac and cheese... lots of real cheese, milk, all the things that are worth the pain on occasion. My mood was generally okay but I still knew I needed a little extra comfort. I cooked dinner at her house and we got caught up on Grey’s Anatomy with a box of chocolates between us. And then things started to unravel.

First it was Tampa sending me a “Happy Valentine’s Day” text. That pissed me off to no end. Like, how fucking dare he!?! What did he think I would do given that I haven’t responded to ANY of the messages he’s sent me? Did he think I’d be so weak and sad that I’d finally reply and open that door again? Fuck that!

And then Byron called me. I love that man with all of my heart and wish I was closer so I could be more of a support. His daughter’s murderer was convicted of 2nd degree murder and a stack of lesser offenses which was good news overall. I think he expected the verdict to make him feel better, but I’m afraid that it’s just taken away the thing he was focusing his anger. I worry about him all the time.

The thing that broke the floodgates during our call was him talking about how amazing I am... he tells me that I’m the smartest person he’s ever known and how much he loves me. He said that he knows a lot of his issues in life happened because of his own choices...“It’s not that I didn’t want to grow up I just didn’t know how.” Ouch!

He then said that it’s super shitty because I’ve had to keep rebuilding my life because of other people’s choices and behavior. That’s one of those things that’s almost harder to hear. I honestly thought that I was always the good guy in my own story because I couldn’t see what I was doing wrong. That’s human nature. We need to believe we are doing things right even if we aren’t. Having someone outside of it all telling me that I wasn’t wrong except for loving the wrong men and giving too much of myself away... fuck... It really is harder to hear that I am worthy, I am loved, I am fucking amazing and that it’s truly their loss. Just ouch.

Saturday morning I woke up around 6am in a lot of pain, physical and emotional. After crying for a little while, I dozed off again and slept until well past 10am. Even then, there was more crying and lounging in bed until almost noon while I messaged Puppy and chatted a bit with Subby Soldier.

I made plans to pull myself out of bed and meet Subby Soldier at a local park then go to a movie. It was a slow morning and he said he was helping a friend with his computer but he’d keep me posted on timing. I was dressed and ready to go when he said he had gotten in the shower. And that’s when the bubble burst. Subby Soldier had told me that he and his wife were in an open relationship... that she would be so excited to hear about his stories as that’s what their thing was... Nope!

I was the one to do the blocking... And it wasn’t about him by any means. I was genuinely just looking for a band aid... for temporary relief while I’m putting myself back together. But I felt really stupid. I pulled my boots off and cried away all of my makeup.

Byron called me in the midst of a crying jag which helped me simmer down a bit. He was just checking in on me again, but he opened with asking if I’d heard about the trial. When he called on Friday night he sounded... tired... and I do worry that he isn’t maintaining his sobriety after all. I wouldn’t blame or judge him in the least if that was the case, I just want him healthy and safe.

It was also in the throes of it all that a communication breakdown happened between Juno and Puppy about him coming down today. One of the things I’d been thinking about when I woke up was that I wasn’t sure if I was ready to have Puppy stay overnight. Sex is one thing, sleeping together is a whole other level of intimacy.

Juno had asked Puppy to talk about things, not because she isn’t comfortable with me but because she’s owning her own feelings and growing pains around practicing polyamory after their history of monogamy...I seriously adore her!

I expressed MY feelings to Puppy and he assumed that Juno had said something to me that prompted it. He lashed out to her and she called me crying.

I reassured her the best I could that I was not going to allow Puppy to behave like that and that if he didn’t get it together and take proper care of her emotional needs that he would lose me quick. I’m not about to cause any more pain or stress for her. As much as I adore Puppy and am looking forward to seeing his D-type side it’s not worth it to me if everything isn’t fully above board and healthy everywhere. I ‘laid the law down’ with Puppy I got a short reply, then nothing for several hours until he messaged later with an apology.

I pulled myself together eventually, had a bite of sativa fudge and made myself some air-fried buffalo tofu. From there I pulled out a Frida puzzle and started sorting it.

My phone rang a little later and it was Spartan Man from Texas. He’s been on facebook a ton lately and I’d just been thinking about how much I missed having the kind of relationship he and I had. We were on and off for about 6 years. When we were free we had amazing sex, made videos together and were generally fuck buddies with emphasis on buddies.

When we were involved with others and doing the monogamy thing we still enjoyed hanging out, watching documentaries and having long talks about the nature of life, humanity, and all things deep and esoteric. He did kinda fall off the deep end awhile back with his affinity for Alex Jones and all things 2 steps too far into homeopathic land, but over-all he’s a good guy and we always had drama-free fun together.

We talked about the good times and the ‘blue screen moments’ as he called the really good times, especially the one when I came over to trip sit while he and his roommate were shrooming. We are both single but I know that actually getting romantically involved with him would be out of the question, even if we were in the same zip code. However, I wouldn’t rule out a weekend together at some point.

After we hung up I realized that my fudge had kicked in and I was a little high. I sent him a text apologizing if I’d been extra chatty and telling him why. More flirty texts were exchanged before I melted into the couch for more Letterkenny until I was ready for bed.

Overall Saturday was exhausting so I didn’t feel bad crawling back into bed less than 12 hours from when I’d crawled out. I slept this morning until 9am and have been chatting with Juno all morning.

She and Puppy seem to be doing a little better this morning and she sent me a pic of them curled up in bed with their new little fur baby. It made me smile lots.

Ultimately, I get it that the Universe is just keeping me out of trouble. I’m trying not to be resentful of the fact that I’m clearly not allowed a band aid and that I have to do all of this the hard way... again... but in the end I know it’s just another round of serious growing pains.

I’ve got my tattoo consult in a few hours. I’ve decided on a phoenix to cover the bad ink on my shoulder that I got 25 years ago. The artist won’t be available to do the work until Sept/Oct but but her work is worth waiting for. That, and depending on how many sessions it will take I may get it done on or near my birthday.

I’m on my do-over 40 and skipping to 42 this fall because, as we all know, 42 is the meaning of life!

Off to start the day... or should I say afternoon. We’ll see how things go with Puppy and how I’m feeling tomorrow. I’m hoping that things will go well and I’ll have a big smile on my face soon enough... but I know that whatever happens it really is for the best.

I hear you, Universe! I really do!

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captainsbabysitter-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Space Princesses and Coffee Dates: Ch 2

So there’s probably going to be at least one more full chapter to this. Because @yourtropegirl asked for no smut, I might make an extra chapter at some point that can be read separately for those of you who would like that particular payoff.

First Chapter Here

Pairing: McKirk

Rating/Warnings: E for everyone. Fluff’s ahoy. Maybe some secondhand embarrassment.

Length: 1525 words

Summary: Here’s the date, guys! Enjoy awkward turtle Jim being precious.

The confirming text came a few hours later. ‘Sister said yes. Up for coffee in the morning?’

‘Coffee’s just about the only thing I *am* up for in the morning.’ And so what if he was picturing the way Bones’ eyes crinkled when he chuckled as Jim sent his reply.

He nearly choked on his mouthful of coffee when Len’s answer came back as ‘That’s a shame.’

“You okay, keptin?” Pavel’s voice carried across the room.

“He’s texting that doctor,” Sulu smirked. No one should look that smug when failing to fix an espresso machine. “Sounds like he’s better at flirting than we thought.”

A groan from the Russian preceded a $5 bill being slid across the counter. Sulu’s smug factor ramped up another couple notches as he pocketed it.

Jim tried to find it in himself to be offended. “You placed a bet on that?”

“What else are we going to do?” Sulu shrugged. Quiet curses were immediately followed by a resigned grumble. “Pav call Scotty. This stupid thing won’t work. With any luck, he’ll get in tonight.”

“Have fun with that,” Jim grinned while he tapped away at his phone. “I’m gonna lock up. You have your keys? Ny’s cat buried Spock’s somewhere and he can’t find them. You’ll have to let both of you in in the morning.”

“Yeah, alright,” Sulu waved him off absently, still not entirely content to leave the ill-behaved machine alone. “Have fun on your date. We expect details.”

“A lady doesn’t kiss and tell.”

“Good thing you’ve never been described as ladylike in your life.”

Jim had a good chuckle at that as he hit most of the lights and locked the door behind him.

~*~*~

The next morning was largely spent getting ready. Under normal circumstances, Jim relied almost exclusively on his charm and how good his ass looked in jeans, but something about the way Bones flirted so casually twisted his tongue and his gut in knots while sending his heart thrumming against his ribcage. It had him standing in front of his closet, wide awake and just a little manic, at 6am. Two hours should be long enough to find something to wear, right? His thoughts were interrupted by several rapid-fire alerts from his phone.

‘You’ll be fine.’ Of course Ny would’ve heard. ‘Don’t overthink it and just be yourself.’

‘Nyota has informed me I should wish you well on your date.’

‘She said I should wish you luck, but as I don’t believe in it I saw little point.’

That was the tension break Jim needed. He laughed to himself and sent off a couple quick ‘Thanks, guys’ and turned back to his choices. It was just a coffee date, not dinner out somewhere nice so slacks seemed a bit much. Ass-hugging jeans it was, then. He chewed on his lip a bit as he debated between t-shirt and a button-up.

He snagged his phone from where he’d tossed it on the bed and took a couple pics to send to Uhura. ‘Ny I’m hopeless help?’

‘Oh my god, do you love this guy or something? You’re just going for coffee, right?’

‘Yeah at that café down the street from my place.’

‘Go with the t-shirt, but wear that leather jacket.’

‘Thanks. You’re the best.’

‘I know.’

Once the clothes were laid out on the bed, Jim hopped in the shower. His hair was styled meticulously, toothbrush sticking out of his mouth as his attention waffled between hygiene routines.

Ny knew exactly what she was talking about. Once Jim shrugged the leather jacket onto his shoulders and turned every which way in front of the mirror on the back of his door, he had to admit she was right. The jeans and t-shirt hugged his body nicely and the jacket was just loose enough. Together they looked thrown together enough to be casual for the setting, but definitely good enough to be worn on a date. He ran a hand over his chin just once more to make sure he didn’t miss a spot shaving before he booked it out the door. Just a few minutes to 8; if he left now, he’d make it to the café in time.

Len was leaning against the wall just beside the door waiting for him when Jim finally came up, and the blond felt his mouth run dry; those jeans should be illegal and the way he had the sleeves rolled up and the top couple buttons undone was just downright sinful. He’d let his stubble grow in again, and Jim had to admit the effect was stunning. He enjoyed the view for another couple moments before Len glanced his way and smiled.

“Hey, Bones!” Did he sound as jittery as he thought he sounded? He hoped not. Not when Bones looked cool as a cucumber.

“Morning, Jim.” Len pushed away from the wall as Jim drew closer. “Ready to head in?”

The grin he gave in response was cheeky. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

They put in their orders at the counter and settled themselves at a table on the terrace. The sun was coming up over the trees, and there was a soft bite to the air that said fall was coming. Jim found himself looking around, hands fidgeting and leg bouncing as he struggled to remember any of the roughly fifty million conversation starters he’d thought up since the night before.

Bones didn’t seem like he was about to let that go. He ran his eyes over Jim’s shifting form for just a second before he reached over to snag his hand. “You nervous, Jimmy?”

“Are you not?”

“Honestly? This is the first date I’ve been on since before Jo was born. I think my heart’s about to hop out’ve my throat.”

“Glad I’m not the only one!”

Both of them laughing finally cuts the tension and conversation flows easily. Len asked about how Jim came to own Enterprise Books at such a young age (inherited from his adopted father), Jim asked some questions about his daughter.

“Her mother got primary custody and I let Joss have the house so Jo wouldn’t have to move somewhere different. Us splitting was nasty enough even if she was only a newborn when it was all happening.”

Jim let out a low whistle. “Wow, that sounds rough. If she had primary custody, how’d the munchkin come to live here with you?”

“There was a car accident. Joss was on her way to get Jo from daycare about a year ago and a car drifted into her lane going something like double the speed limit. You got the bookstore from your adoptive dad? What happened to your birth parents?”

“Father died the day I was born, mum didn’t handle it well, and Uncle Frank’s drunk ass was the reason dad won custody without much of a fight. He was one of my father’s army buddies, I guess.”

“And where is he now?”

A slow smile crept to Jim’s lips as he leaned in. “Why? Looking to meet the parents already? Dad retired, his husband is still a doctor.”

“Oh, so you’re just taking after your dad and chasing a doctor, huh?” Apparently two can play the teasing game. Len rested his chin in his hand and ran his eyes over Jim’s form. “Granted, you’d make a perfect trophy husband, kid.”

“Depends. You still in your residency? Can’t afford much of a trophy husband if you are.”

“If I were still in my residency, do you think I’d have so much spare time to hang around the store flirting?”

That startles him a bit. Honestly, Jim hadn’t noticed. “You were flirting?”

Len nodded and took a sip of his coffee, offering up a smile to the girl who came out to refill their cups. “Thanks. And yeah, Jim, I was flirting with you. I think. I’m not great at it, apparently.”

“I’m just oblivious, I guess.”

The rest of breakfast was spent chatting about light topics of interest. Jim found himself falling hard and fast as he listened to stories about Len’s childhood in Georgia, his quick yet difficult skip through his undergrad and med school (seriously, who finishes their residency before 28?), and everything that led him here to San Francisco. In turn, Jim told him about Iowa, his rather impressive track record of runaways and misdemeanors before he even hit his teens, and how he came to live with Chris when he was just shy of 10 years old. Len leaned forward intently as Jim regaled him with the story of how Chris and Phil met.

“They didn’t waste any time, did they?” Len chuckled.

“No, they didn’t,” Jim agreed before he drew his lip between his teeth in thought. “Y’know… Neither should we. If you’re interested, I mean, my place is just down the block…”

He shifted a bit under Len’s suddenly intense gaze. Had he misread the whole situation? Maybe this really was just supposed to be them meeting up as friends and he’d assumed too much.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

Jim blinked at him in surprise. “Really?”

“Lead the way, o captain, my captain.”

Tagging: @mccoymostly @thevalesofanduin @emmkolenn @thinkwritexpress-official @auduna-druitt @pinkamour1588 @southernbellestatues @thislovelymaelstrom

#why does mckirk happen to good people #mckirk #jim kirk #leonard mccoy #tia writes

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liebeztod · 5 years ago

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we will always belong together

I am ready to talk about Peter.

Silly, because Peter is all I ever talk about, or think about. But I want to talk about what has happened, what it's like having him back; the happiness, the sadness, the new fears, the new hopes.

I didn't go to Japan expecting to see him. I went to Japan with the hopes of seeing him, but it all seemed so... far-fetched. With our timeline, it just seemed impossible.

I hadn't seen him since July of 2014. I hadn't spoken to him since April of 2017.

When I made my plans for Japan, I knew deep in my heart I would like to see him. But after 2 years of sending him messages, begging him to come back, I felt that any message to him would go unanswered.

Even with Max somewhat plastered onto my heart, I thought -- well, Peter can still come back. If he really didn't want to hear from me, he would have blocked my number on WhatsApp, or blocked me on Facebook.

So I didn't reach out prior to my Japan visit. But I did hope that maybe he'd see a Facebook post or two of me in his adopted country.

And... he did. Just that. And it still all feels like a dream.

I was in Tokyo for a day and a half, at most. Initially, anyway. I did the baseball thing, which took up most my free day in Tokyo. Five days later, it was my last day in Kyoto and I woke up to the message I had been hoping to see for two years.

At first, when I saw Peter's name I didn't think it was real. I sighed, said: "I've dreamt of this hundreds of times." Literally HUNDREDS. Never mind that the dream was so much more detailed, I refused to fall for it. But still, I got up, left my phone in my little hostel room, and took a shower. When I came back to my room, I paused. Did I peer at my phone in a dreamlike state, or was that WhatsApp notification real?

This time I opened up WhatsApp and read the message: An apology. A long, winded apology. A request to see me if I were coming back to Tokyo.

Of course, I was coming back to Tokyo after my tour ended in Osaka. Suddenly, my entire trip felt like it had been turned upside down. Peter's name, a name I thought would never grace my phone again, set my heart aflutter and demolished any progress I might have made in the last 2 years.

And the thing is, none of it has ever really been progress. Everything I have done was still tinged with spite against him. I slept with Dieter because I was mad at Peter, I slept with David because I was mad at Peter. I stopped sleeping with men for over a year until I slept with Max, and I did that because I liked Max, but there was still that reminder of Peter. Why? Because similar to Peter, Max was my friend. I trusted Peter, and I trusted Max, and I just couldn't shake the similarities, the gentleness, the familiarity.

Anyway, I'll get to the psycho anlayzation in a bit.

I replied to Peter saying, "You have no idea how long I have waited for this message. Of course I want to see you!" And for the rest of the week we texted each other as if nothing had changed. Of course, I wanted to pummel him, to scream, to cry but I thought -- there's plenty of time to do that in person.

I flew to Tokyo from Osaka on April 14th. I was terrified. I couldn't sleep. I said goodbye to all my tour mates the night before, and lay in that uncomfortable bunk bed all night until 6am rang and I had to walk my ass 1 mile to the bus station. I was so nervous, so so so so nervous.

Upon reaching my hotel in Tokyo, right across the street from Shinagawa Station, I texted him that I couldn't check in until 4pm. I said, "We can meet now, if you'd like? I'm in my airplane clothes, so don't judge."

He told me to meet him at Ueno Park, by the Hard Rock Cafe. I scoffed, to which he said, "We won't GO to the Hard Rock, it's just a landmark."

Unfortunately, though, I couldn't figure out how to get to Ueno Park from the station. I keep blaming it on Google Maps -- as Google Maps would read my directions to me in Mandarin rather than Japanese -- but I'm sure my nerves had a great deal to do with it. Of course, there were plenty of lines that would drop me off at Ueno Park, but I just couldn't wrap my head around subway instructions, or seeing him. I think, a month later, I can finally realize that I was trying to prolong the suspense and longing I had felt for two years.

Suddenly, for the first time in FIVE years I was going to see him again. For the first time in two years, I was going to hear his voice again. I felt like I was in a movie as I waited for him to fetch me at Shinagawa Station. I stood inside the station, near one of the many escalators to one of the many platforms. I didn't know which direction or platform he was coming from -- all I knew is I was scared shitless. Embarrassed by how I looked without makeup, or refinement, or perfume. I was leaning against a bannister, overlooking the platform for the Tokkaido Line, listening to Sunday in the Park With George. (Honestly, a fitting soundtrack for Peter and I!)

20 minutes into waiting, something told me to turn around. I stood straight and turned around, watching people pass by, observing the vending machines across the way from me, looking at the different platform signs and the stairways below them.

5 minutes into my nervous people-and-thing watching, however, I saw him coming up the stairway from the Yamanote Line platform. That dark, messy hair, the glasses, his dark eyes -- tall and in a garish sweater, and I thought, "Oh my god, this is real. My life is a goddamn romcom."

If I remember correctly, we walked toward each other. I don't think I let him close the distance all on his own. We hugged, of course, and I think I muttered a, "Oh my god, hello?"

I can't remember all that was said between us in those initial moments. He was trying to get us to Sensoji Shrine. He found the right subway line to take us there, and as we sat on that train (or stood? I can't remember) he asked what I had been listening to. I think I clumsily tried to explain Sunday in the Park with George, awkwardly praising Stephen Sondheim's genius but I was too amazed by Peter's presence, after so long an absence. In my head I had almost convinced myself that he had never existed in the first place.

We walked around Sensoji, walked to Kitchen town (or something like that), went to Akihabara, everywhere touristy that I never managed to visit in that day in a half I was in Tokyo. We played arcade games together, ate udon, shopped. He did whatever I wanted to do, which was very nerve-wrecking.

We got a coffee around 5pm. I wanted to burst, so finally I said it: "Don't you find it strange, being here with me?"

He seemed so taken aback by the question.

"I suppose I did at first, but... now I feel like nothing has changed between us. I am still the same person I've always been." I wanted to laugh a bitter, ugly laugh at that. Perhaps I did on the inside, since I can still hear it in my memory.

"I am not the same person I was 2 years ago," I replied. I changed the subject, regretting having brought it up. I wanted an in depth conversation, but it wasn't going to happen in a coffee shop full of customers.

I suggested going back to my hotel so I could freshen up before dinner.

While he waited in my room, I showered, shaved, did everything I could thinking I was getting laid that night. We had dinner, shared pleasant conversation.

As we walked back to the hotel I told him, "I really missed you." He groaned, "I'm not good at this sort of thing, expressing myself." Annoyed, I berated him with, "Neither am I, it took a lot of courage for me to say that." And he laughed and said, "Oh, fine. Yes, of course I missed you too, but that's my own fault, isn't it?"

It was, but I had already forgiven him. Of course I still wanted to talk, but I already knew where my heart was. I knew I wanted him. When we reached the lobby, I invited him back to my room, but he politely declined, blaming it on stomach issues. I felt so humiliated, but I tried again.

"Please, we don't have to do anything -- you can just stay with me."

He then did something I will never forget; he grabbed both my hands and said, "I really want to come up, I do. I just don't feel well. Tomorrow? We can have dinner after your Disney visit?"

I felt a bit better about that, and believed him. I said, "Yes, of course."

Come Monday, after Disney Tokyo Sea, I got back to the hotel around 6:30pm. He met me in the hotel lobby. We had ramen near the hotel. Afterward, I tried slutting it up again.

"Do you want to come upstairs for a coffee or tea?" I asked. "Yes, let's do that," he replied.

I made him his espresso, a tea for myself, and we sat at this little table right next to the window. I had a wonderful view of the Tokyo skyline. It was so picturesque. I've never seen this movie, but I think that maybe Peter and I sitting against this nighttime vision of Tokyo could've been a shot in Lost in Translation.

He speaks first: "We need to talk about something." And I feel all hope, all wonder and happiness drain out of me. I know exactly what's going to come out of his mouth.

"I know this isn't fair to you, because I have most definitely been leading you on, and of course you wouldn't know because of what I did, but... I am seeing someone."

I can no longer look at him. I'm staring at the cup in my hands, at the window pane, at the green patterned carpet, and all I can muster up is, "Of course you are. I wish I had asked, I wanted to ask--"

And he said, "I wanted to tell you, but I was so scared. I was enjoying my time with you too much."

Shaking my head, I go, "No, no, it's fine -- you don't owe me anything --"

"But I do. I should have told you. The thing is, when we were in the elevator, I wasn't sure what I was going to decide to do. I want you, I want to be with you like that."

Shocked by this admission, I look up, so confused, and joyful, and bitter and relieved.

"I do not want to leave here without you knowing that I want you. I want you and me in that ridiculously huge bed, but--I can't do that to Katie."

I make notes to remember the moment forever, until I realize it's my turn to speak. I ask about Katie. He himhaws, saying, "I don't want to talk about her..." And I retaliate with, "I would feel much better if you told me about her. Please, tell me about her so I know she is a real person." He asks why, and I say, "Because -- you're telling me you're willing to do THAT, well so am I."

I guess it's strange. When I was in Las Vegas for my conference 2 months ago, 2 married men literally propositioned sex to me and I turned them down. My excuses being "for the sanctity of your marriage," and my respect for their wives. But as soon as the love of my life, Peter, tells me he thought about it I am suddenly bereft of any moral compass. I am basically begging him to tell me about Katie, because, well... what other barrier did I have?

He tells me about her: she is a bit older, they met in a foreigners group, like me she is American.

I ask, "How're things between you two?" And his answer is everything I want. "Things are fine... they're okay. I mean, yes, it's just okay, but I still can't do that with you as much as I want to." "You're not being very convincing." "I know, this is very hard. Being here with you, after that night in London."

He then asks, "Has there been anyone else? Since you and I?" And I get flustered, and say, "Yes." He says, "Oh, I am glad." I say, "Uh, don't be. Everyone since you has been a mistake." He asks why. I explain the situation with Mark, and Peter looks visibly angry. I explain a few others, and the way they mistreated me, and the ways I mistreated them.

"I have to be honest," and truly, this was the most honest I have ever been with someone to their face, "everything since you was just me trying to get over you. There have never been feelings attached, and maybe that's the problem. Mark hurt me physically, yes, but not emotionally the way you have done."

I don't mean to hurt Peter in this way, but I can see it stings a bit. I keep going.

"Max was the closest thing I had to moving on from you, but even still -- he's on a different continent, like you were. I don't think there's anything but you."

He seems so disappointed by this. He says, "But we only knew each other for a total of, what? Five days in London? How can you have feelings for me?"

And I am hurt by this. "I know, it's ridiculous, but doesn't that make it all the more valid? I knew I had feelings for you after five days. I still wanted you, even when I got back to California. All these years. You were the closest thing I had to a boyfriend, the only person who ever called me and seemed interested in my days. Was London just a fling?"

And he was so quick to say, "Absolutely not. I had feelings for you too, but knew you were leaving. I didn't want you to go."

A question I had always wanted answered. My heart melts. He tells me there were 2 girls between me and Katie. I tell him I don't want to tell him my number. I tell him I'm not so much interested in sex anymore thanks to Mark, I just do it to remind myself how much I dislike it.

"Then who is to say, if we had sex tonight, that you would like it?" I shrug. "I feel like it'd be different with you, because I actually like you, Peter." He seems confused. I press on: "I mean, you set the bar pretty damn high. You could've 'taken my virginity' -- you had a good three opportunities to do so -- and you never did. You being utterly decent has turned every guy since you into a monster. With what Mark did, with what others have done... my nights with you were the most romantic. I trust you. If we were together, I know you wouldn't hurt me."

Somewhere in all this, he tells me that Katie plans on moving back to Hawaii in August.

He says, "She wants me to quit my job and move there with her. But I don't want to do that. I want to stay here for another 3 years. I know it isn't going to last."

And then he says the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me:

"Even knowing this, we can't... we can't do what you and I both want to do. Because then you'll always know I'm willing to cheat, and I don't want you to think that of me. Because... because I think we are going to end up together, maybe not this year, but we will be with each other."

I think all the breath left my body at that admission. Whether he was saying it to make me feel desired, or ease my disappointment, I was so much more head over heels for him than I had ever been. I think all I could say was, "Wow."

He went on, "Hopefully it won't be another five years before we see each other, but it's going to be us."

Apparently, by this point, Katie has already tried calling him a couple of times. He says, "I don't know what I am going to tell her. I can't say I've been spending time with another woman whom I have history with."

Huh, that's right -- I'm a woman. But in all of this I felt like a very powerless girl who has been given the world, or a perfectly petaled flower with which I've won a game of "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not."

I beg him not to tell her he's been with me. He says, of course. I tell him I will walk him downstairs. He mutters something like, "I will keep you updated on whatever happens after August, of course."

We stand up, and we hug -- but it's unlike any embrace I've ever had. He holds onto me for a good 4 minutes, at least. I do the same, breathing in his scent which I so loved back in 2014. My nose buried in his chest, his shoulder, although I wanted nothing more than to look up at him and have him lean down to kiss me.

One hand of his moved up my back to my neck, and then finally to my head which he cradled to his heart. It was the most romantic embrace I have ever been in, and as loved as I felt, I also felt very nervous about the whole thing. I couldn't help myself, and in my usual awkward fashion I thought a joke would diffuse the tension in the room. As my face was buried in his shoulder I muttered, "God, are we in Casablanca?"

He reprimanded me, in that haughty, sardonic tone of his that I so deeply missed, "Oh, shut up!" He held me tighter. I felt my heart well up with so much love and all I could think was, "Oh dear god, I missed this -- I missed him scolding me, I missed his sarcasm, I missed him, I love him, oh god, oh god, never let me go."

But of course, Katie was calling.

I walked him down to the lobby, where he held me again for a second. He asked to see me one more time. As the next day was my last day in Tokyo, I of course said yes.

The next day was hard, though. While souvenir shopping I cried several times, thinking of Peter and I -- starcrossed again. The timing being wrong.

He sent me a lovely WhatsApp message that day, saying something like, "I can't stop thinking about you. I am upset that you have had a bad time romantically, and all I want to do is hold you. I wish we could do something about it together, but the timing is not right."

I am reduced to a primal despair at this, but also a hope that there'll be a time for us. I reply that I had dreamt he held me -- and god, was that dream vivid. He didn't reply and I felt very nervous by this. But we still met for dinner, and it was fine -- hardly any mention of the conversation the night prior. Just two gaijin in the outer ring of Tokyo in an Okinawan restaurant.

He walked me back to the train station. It was close to 11:30PM, the last train was about to depart. It was all so... dramatic. He said to me, "I know it's only been three days, but I have gotten so used to you being here. I really liked seeing you everyday."

My heart, which had broken every moment since we were reunited on Sunday, continues shattering into smaller and smaller pieces. I think, 'I'm never going to recover from this one, am I?'

I say, "Well, we just have to make sure we see each other again, and sooner. I will make sure we see each other before five years passes again."

He grunts, "Maybe."

I say, "No, not that again. Once you told me we'd never see each other again. And look, here we are -- not expecting to see each other this week. We can, and we will. I will make sure of it."

He says, "I did say that, didn't I? God, I am a little shit. I am so glad I was wrong."

We get to the turnstiles. I tell him, "I will miss you." He says, "Yes, I will miss you too."

As we lean toward each other to hug goodbye, his hands find their way onto my neck and into my hair again. I sigh as he pulls my head to his chest again; my hands wrap around his back and clutch tightly at his sweater. I think I muttered a very sad, "This is like London all over again. I do not want to leave you." He makes some sort of noise in agreement, and whispers in my ear, "I will keep you updated on the situation I am in."

We let go of each other, until he grabs my hands and says, "Will you look back at me when you get past the turnstiles?"

I laugh, and tell him of course. I say, "goodbye," although it is the furthest thing from good. And I go through the turnstile, look back at him and this deep want of being returned to him fills every part of my body.

I sit on an empty train back to Tokyo Station, where I will have to transfer onto another train to Shinagawa Station, and I think -- I should have said it.

So I take out my phone and text him (his phone had died right before he walked me back to the station): "I'm not great at voicing my feelings or expressing myself, so I am sorry for saying this here, and if it makes you uncomfortable but I want you to know -- I am going to wait for you. I know you don't want me to, but I can't help it. I still love you."

He replied to me while I was lying in bed, staring out at the Tokyo skyline. He told me not to wait, that nothing is guaranteed, and of course he loved me too.

I replied back with a simple, "I will try, but between now and August, do you really think I'll fall in love?"

He did not reply.

And I know the answer. I will not fall in love knowing I have been reunited with the love of my life. And as disappointed as I was that we did not sleep together, I also should be grateful that in not doing so, it has proven that Peter's words were genuine. He didn't want to see me just to sleep with me. I know he wants me, that he is remorseful, that he had feelings for me spanning back to London 2014...

It was all so romantic, and laughable and dramatic. I came back feeling like I was on Cloud 9. Suddenly all the love songs made sense again. Any semblance of feeling I had for Max was suddenly eradicated; my heart only beats for Peter. I also feel like I've taken a vow of celibacy. Of course, as much as I dislike sex, I still like everything that leads up to it. But I only seem to choose partners who take me, but don't know how to satisfy. Of course, that's another reason I dislike sex -- because I don't choose considerate partners.

I remember specifically bedding Chris A. from New Jersey, and how he pushed my head down to give him head, but he did not return the favor.

I keep thinking about Brett, and how he keeps sexting me about how he wants to sexually dominate me. And the thing is, I am no angel, I egg it on knowing full well we will not be sleeping together, but sexting can be just as exciting.

I've even met with Brett for a drink -- 2 Mondays ago, to be exact. I could tell how much he wanted me, especially in the way he'd look for any excuse to touch my exposed knee or wrist as we sat at that divey, nasty Irish bar.

My heart belongs to Peter. And of course, Tokyo seemed so romantic -- now, being back in realistic Los Angeles, I do have to apply some realism to the situation. There is the possibility that maybe, just maybe, things are more than "Fine" and "Okay" with his girlfriend, Katie. Maybe she'll stay in Tokyo. Maybe he'll move to Hawaii. Maybe he and I will not end up together.

That is a hard pill to swallow. But I feel like these are not worries that will even matter until August. I will have some sort of answer then. And even then... I will still feel the way that I feel. If two years of being ghosted aren't enough to dissuade my feelings, then why would the obstacle of another woman stop me from being in love with Peter?

It does make me sad, though, this idea that if I don't end up with Peter, I will never find my way to something else. I am very scared I won't end up with him, and that I'll be in limbo looking for something better.

How can there be something better, though, after him? He has done the worst thing in ignoring me for 2 years, and I still loved him.

Also... it's not just Peter. Men are just... awful. I hate dating, and the expectation of sex on the first date, and how boring they are. No one is interesting, no one is exciting. I also dislike that I like hurting men, because it saves me from the possibility of them hurting me. Not that I think that they can.

Mark left bruises, David didn't understand the meaning of the word 'stop,' and Dieter gave me HPV. These are different hurts, pains -- but these are things I am definitely able to bounce back from. Yes, they have scarred me physically, and I can openly admit I have an unhealthy relationship with sex as a result of my time with them -- but none of it will matter if I can have Peter, because he doesn't take when he knows he can. He would ask, he is gentle.

I think I like having sex, as terrible as the act is, to make me look forward to Peter all the more. Maybe I like having sex, as terrible as the act is, to prove to myself that I am as worthless as I believe I am. I have a lot of conflicting ideas on sex, but at the end of the day, I know I will not like it unless it's me making love with someone I love. The missing ingredient... love, and trust, and decency. That doesn't exist in a Tinder date, or a coworker.

God, I love him so! And how I am constantly writing poetry about him in my head, and how I think of what he would think as I drive and sing along to music on my commute.

If we do not end up together, my god, I do not know how I will manage to recover. These last 2 years were a miracle -- but now that I am back at square one, how can I find the strength to live without him? Again? It'd be wishful thinking to suggest I'll survive the heartbreak a second time around.

#lwta #drea diaries

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junioradventure · 6 years ago

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GETTING SIGNED STRAY KIDS’ CUPS from SOUL CUP café at JYP!

WHAT A WEEKEND. I can’t believe I actually got... autographed cups from Stray Kids ㅠㅠ And to think that I stumbled upon the news of the event pretty much randomly.

So, I’m sure STAYS know about Stray Kids’ official Twitter, Instagram, and even Facebook handles, but to get the in-depth and most current information, schedule, and events of the group, you should join their “JYP Fan’s” cafe as well! Heck, I didn’t even know about it until like a week ago, honestly. I mostly saw their updates on their IG, but the JYP Fan’s website is where it’s at. It’s basically like their fancafe. You can go to the website and join easily here. I also didn’t keep track of their Twitter up until recently when I got to check it out, but their Twitter updates also link to the JYP website for events and all that good stuff! Keep reading for the full experience!

Anyway, after waking up at around 12 o’clock in the afternoon on Saturday, I thought, today is going to be a relaxing day. Yesterday was rough, but it’s the weekend, so I’m just gonna kick back! I check the Stray Kids’ fancafe just on a whim and I saw that they added a new event.

“Stray Kids 1st Anniversary with SOUL CUP”

WHAT THE HECK, THAT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE! Granted, I didn’t check the fancafe on Friday because of the aforementioned craziness of how busy and tiring that day was for me, but darn it, I should have because it felt like a bomb just dropped on me! I hurriedly threw on some clothes, got ready, and looked up the way to get to that cafe from my place in Jeongja.

The cafe is in the Gangdong area, literally on the first floor of the JYP Entertainment building. From my area, since I’m in Bundang, it took around an hour and a half, with walking, subway, and a bus. I got there around 3 something.

Some JYP Entertainment pictures I took.

I got off at a bus stop across the street and passed the front entrance of the building, as the cafe’s entrance is located on the side. You just walk and pass the JYP building but turn left immediately at the edge of the building. You will see a giant red cup and there’s the entrance to the cafe.

It’s kinda hard to miss it.

A grander view of the main entrance.

Hmm, no line. “It must not be busy!” I foolishly think as I walk in, my mind numb to reality as I order a drink. I ask the cashier, “Do you have the Stray Kids cup?” to which he replies, “It’s sold out.”

I’m okay. No, really I am. I sit down after getting my mango blueberry smoothie, which was actually really yummy. I find a nice seat and see a giant projector screen on a little stage, which was playing all JYP artists’ music videos (including SKZ of course!)

(I only have video footage of the screen and such. I want to put together a little video too, I hope I can manage to get that done lol)

The atmosphere is really nice and chill, but the music videos playing throughout the cafe made me wanna jam out haha which I did. I saw some fans and... they had signed cups ㅠㅠ At this point, I also ordered a slice of chocolate salted sea caramel cake because I came all the way here so I might as well have my cake and eat it too.

As I finish my food, I remembered something from the announcement on the fancafe... The event said it was running from Saturday to Monday... which might mean... I went up to the barista and asked if they would have more cups tomorrow. She said yes. OMG OMG OMG OMG- that’s what was going on in my head. I still have a chance. I told myself, tomorrow you are coming back here and this time you will get. Those. Signed. Cups.

I woke up at 6am. I couldn’t even properly sleep that night because I had weird, random mini-dreams (unrelated lol). However, I got myself up and out of the house, on a mission.

I got to the cafe at around 7:19 am. However, there were already a lot of fans waiting... I got in line but there were at least, hmm, around like... I can’t even estimate correctly, like 60 people or so in front of me? Don’t quote on me on that number though, because it seemed like quite a lot. And thus began my waiting game. I was nervous that I wasn’t going to get any cups, and my journey back here would be for naught. It was bitingly cold, and I was hungry.

Then I realized, negative thoughts would not help me at this moment. I plugged in my earphones and started listening to “Mixtape #3″. GOSH I LOVE THIS SONG, it always lifts my spirits and this time was no different. More and more people showed up and got in line. The line was so long, it went to the end of the street and then the line continued like across from me.

After what seemed like an eternity, the line started moving! It moved up quicker than I had thought, but once I was in the front door, that’s when it seemed like I was only moving a few inches at a time. The line zigzagged like three times towards the cashier. A lot of Stray Kids MV’s were playing. The place was abuzz with STAYS. I tried to keep the doubts and fear out of my head. I was almost near the counter...

What I saw before I ordered at the counter! Just to further showcase the event :)

LUCKILY, I GOT THE SIGNED CUPS! ㅠㅠ

Apparently, with every drink or food you purchase, you could get one individually-signed cup, by random. I saw a lot of STAYS generally get 3, so that’s what I did. I ordered a Strawberry Cheesecake Ice Cream, a Dazzering Milk Tea, and an affogato. I actually ordered the affogato on accident even though I don’t even really drink coffee.

Right before I ordered, though, there was a particular group of STAYS who were pretty much manning the area right before you order. They were pretty much bartering their cups for their desired member, which was pretty smart because basically everyone in line was a STAY and since the cups were given randomly to us, there was a way everyone could end up with their biases’ signatures. Except if you were Hyunjin biased, because his signed cups were pretty rare from what I heard, and whoever got his, most likely was his fan and wouldn’t want to trade. Luckily, even if I loved them all, the ones I was shooting for was mostly Chan and Woojin.

Anyways, one STAY asked me which member I liked and I told her Chan and Woojin. She echoed it to her friends and apparently they had my biases’ cups!! She really wanted Changbin’s. With fingers crossed, after ordering, the cashier handed me my three cups and...

All 3 were Changbin’s!

The STAYS around me spazzed when they saw my cups, and I was shook too! The same STAY asked me which members I liked again, and then began the trading. She pulled me along after passing down the news of my cups to her friends. She told me to come with her and she brought me to her friend, who had Chan’s cup! I traded one Changbin cup and got my bias’ signed cup ㅠㅠ I was taken the opposite direction, where another STAY had Woojin’s cup! I traded my other Changbin cup for it.

Finally, I figured I might as well make another Changbin fan happy. I asked if someone had Felix’s signed cup, I could part ways with Changbin’s. Another STAY did, and that was it! I was a happy camper. I ate my ice cream and drank my coffee and milk tea happily while watching MV’s on the big screen. For all three items, it cost around 21,000 won (~$`18.47 USD) but for their autographed cups? Ummmm yes please.

Overall, it was a lot of waiting. The cafe actually opens at 9am, and it took around 2 hours to get my order in (and the cups). If I didn’t live like an hour and 20 minutes away by subway, I would’ve wanted to get there earlier x_x Then the waiting wouldn’t have seemed so bad.

But I got my biases’ cups, so everything was worth it!! ㅠㅠ

#straykids #autograph #soulcup #jypentertainment #miroh #스트레이키즈 #fanaccount

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cophinelovin · 8 years ago

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My Life Changed When I Met You Ch. 10

Also on ff.net and AO3.

March 2026

Delphine woke up early, alone in her own apartment. She stretched out, knowing she needed to get up. She had an early meeting today and could not be late. She got up and sauntered into the kitchen to make coffee. She looked over at the clock, chuckling to herself as she saw it was only 6:15. She thought about Cosima and how she would never be seen at this hour of the day. She could hear her voice in her head...That’s why I’m a professor, and all my classes are in the afternoon, Del.

As she prepared her breakfast, she thought about the brunette, and about the last few months. She’d never been so happy in her life. Cosima was something special, and she found her head floating in the clouds whenever she thought about her. She was always on her mind. She had been for years, but now, the connection they shared was deeper, stronger. It felt amazing.

They spent most nights together, but when Delphine needed to get up early, she didn’t want to bother Cosima, so they would spend the time apart. Waking up without her always felt weird after spending so much time together. She found herself reaching over in the morning to feel the empty side of the bed before she even opened her eyes, always forgetting for a moment that Cosima wasn’t there and pouting to herself.

She felt like a teenager again. She was almost 40, yet Cosima made her feel like this was her first love. In a way, it was.

She wanted to wish Cosima a good morning, but she knew if she called her now, the brunette would never let her forget it, so she scarfed down her breakfast and jumped in the shower.

When she got out, she found she had a text message.

Got up to pee. I know you’re up. I miss you in my bed.

Delphine grinned and felt a warmth run through her body. She texted back.

I miss you too. Good morning, mon amour.

Delphine got dressed quickly as Cosima answered.

Skip work. Come cuddle with me. I’m cold.

She chuckled to herself as she responded.

I wish I could. I’ll see you later.

She didn’t receive a response and shook her head, knowing Cosima had fallen back to sleep already. She felt a lightness in her heart as she ran out the door.

---

April 2026

Cosima woke up, opening her eyes to blonde curls, Delphine lying on her stomach, her arms above her head under the pillow, facing away from her. She smiled as she moved in closer, throwing her arm and leg over her girlfriend, her hips shifting half on top of the taller woman’s body.

“Mmm,” Delphine hummed as Cosima gripped her tightly.

“Sorry,” Cosima whispered, “Didn’t mean to wake you up. I just wanted to hold you.” She loved the idea of Delphine being the first thing she saw when she opened her eyes in the morning. It was the most wonderful feeling.

“It’s ok,” the blonde mumbled, her eyes still closed. “I’m surprised you woke up before me,” she joked.

“Yeah, me too,” Cosima chuckled, laying a gentle kiss to Delphine’s bare back.

Delphine sighed and rolled over within Cosima’s embrace, her hands moving to the brunette’s hips and tugged her closer. “Morning,” she breathed before pressing her lips to Cosima’s in a short, sweet kiss.

Cosima smiled. “Hey, would you want to go have a picnic today? Go to the Golden Gate Bridge? Like we used to?” she asked, rubbing lovingly down Delphine’s arm.

“You want to go back there?” Delphine replied.

“Well, I remember how much you used to love it. I think our first summer, we went there like 12 times,” Cosima laughed. “And it’s supposed to be really nice today. I thought we could relax together.”

Delphine grinned, her sleepy eyes full of love for the woman in front of her. “That sounds wonderful.”

---

They picked up food on the way and laid out a blanket when they got to the park, sitting down and looking out onto the bridge in front of them. It was a beautiful day, barely any clouds in the sky and the two women sat next to each other and ate.

Once they finished, Cosima laid back on the blanket, propping herself up with her elbows underneath her. She reached out for Delphine, who was sitting cross legged next to her, looking out at the bridge. “Hey, Del,” she whispered.

“Hmm,” Delphine hummed as she looked down toward the grinning brunette.

Cosima squeezed her side. “Whatcha thinking about?”

“Oh, just how peaceful it is here. I think this is the first place I realized that I belong here,” she told her, “When we would come, you made me feel like I belonged.”

Cosima sat up and wrapped her arms around Delphine’s torso, leaning in to kiss her cheek. She brought her hand up to Delphine’s chin and brought her face toward her. “Hey,” she started, “I’ve been thinking.”

“Uh oh,” Delphine chuckled, placing her hand on Cosima’s knee. “About?”

Cosima smirked, trying to hide her nerves. “Del, um, so like, when I woke up this morning, and I saw you, I got this feeling, like this really giddy feeling in my stomach, and I realized something,” she explained, “I realized I want to wake up next to you every morning, not just some mornings. And like, I want to find your hair in everything...well I already do...but anyway...I want your stuff everywhere so even when you’re not home I can be around it and know you’ll come home soon, to our home, and I want my apartment to smell like you...well, our apartment...and um, I guess that was a really long way of me asking you—”

“Yes,” Delphine interjected, giggling at Cosima’s rambling.

“I didn’t ask you anything yet!” Cosima laughed.

“Well, sometimes I can’t wait for you to finish one of your long rants, and I just need to speak up,” Delphine smiled, pulling at Cosima’s sides. “But go ahead, ask me.”

Cosima grinned. “Del, move in with me?” she asked, her eyes sparkling.

Delphine leaned in, brushing her lips against Cosima’s, excitement running through her body. “Yes,” she breathed before pressing her lips into the brunette’s.

Cosima returned the kiss and couldn’t help her lips from curling up into a smile. She pulled back. “Fuck, I love you so much,” she stated.

Delphine giggled and shook her head. “You and your dirty mouth.”

“You love my dirty mouth,” Cosima teased, wiggling her eyebrows.

“So fucking cheeky,” Delphine joked.

Cosima gasped, pretending to be offended. “You’re stuck with me now...for real. Once you move in with me, that’s it. I hope you’re prepared.”

“Oh, I am prepared, chérie,” Delphine replied, “Prepared to wake you up to exercise with me every day at 6am, and make sure you are eating healthy...no more Eskimo Pies.”

Cosima frowned. “Ok, maybe I should rethink this,” she joked. “Unless your version of exercise and eating healthy is insinuating something else that I might like more,” she winked.

Delphine laughed, pulling her into a hug, resting Cosima's head on her chest. “What am I going to do with you?”

“Love me?”

Delphine sighed. “Always.”

---

June 2026

“You almost ready?”

Cosima leaned over the sink, applying her makeup. “Mhmm, one sec,” she replied.

“We don’t want to be late,” Delphine told her.

Cosima put the cap back on her eyeliner and came out of the bathroom. “All set,” she smiled, looking over her girlfriend. “Del, you look amazing,” she told her, eyeing her curves in her tight black dress.

“You do too,” Delphine echoed, moving in to squeeze gently at Cosima’s hips under her form fitting red dress.

“Come on,” Cosima said, “Scotty is waiting.”

It was Scott’s 40th birthday and his wife was throwing him a huge bash. They arrived at the venue, strolling inside to see plenty of tables and chairs along with a substantial dance floor and a DJ. The party was catered and they were immediately given glasses of wine by one of the waiters as they walked in.

“Holy shit, this is fancy,” Cosima exclaimed.

Delphine leaned in to Cosima’s ear. “Well, when you are one of the top scientists in your field and are responsible for many scientific breakthroughs, you tend to get paid quite well,” she told her, chuckling.

They mingled, wishing Scott a happy birthday and saying hello to their other friends before sitting down as dinner was served. Sarah and Cal were there, along with Felix, who brought his new boyfriend, Colin. They chatted and enjoyed each other’s company before the DJ turned up the music and most of their table got up to dance.

Cosima stood up, reaching her hand out to Delphine. “Dr. Cormier,” she propositioned, “Come dance with me.”

“No, no, Cosima,” Delphine whined.

“Yes, yes, come on,” Cosima told her, grabbing her hand and pulling her up.

Delphine allowed herself to be pulled up and dragged to the dance floor, Cosima pulling Delphine’s arms around her waist as she threw her own arms up around the taller woman’s neck.

Cosima leaned closer as they swayed together. “You are so gorgeous,” she whispered, “I’m pretty sure everyone in this room is jealous of me for being able to dance with you.”

Delphine chuckled and blushed, her hands pressing into Cosima’s lower back. She looked down into Cosima’s gaze, feeling butterflies in her stomach. She still felt like it was the first time Cosima had looked at her like that.

“Holy shit,” Delphine heard someone say. She looked to her right, seeing Paul standing there, a tray in his hand, dressed in a catering outfit. Both women saw him as he came closer. “Delphine Cormier? And Cosima? Damn.”

Delphine pulled back from Cosima for a moment, flashing her most polite smile. “Paul,” she stated.

“Wow,” he replied, looking her up and down.

Cosima did not like the way he was eyeing her and felt herself starting to get defensive. Delphine could feel the change in the brunette’s body language and she squeezed her hand.

“You work here?” Delphine asked, trying her best to have a civilized conversation.

“Oh, my dad owns this catering company. I usually don’t work as a waiter anymore. I’m management, you know, but I had to fill in at the last minute,” he explained in a cocky way, “I’m going to own this company one day.”

“Good for you,” Delphine answered.

Paul nodded, looking between Delphine and Cosima. “Never would’ve pegged you for a lesbian, Delphine,” he chuckled.

Delphine clenched her jaw. “Well, I’m not a lesbian. I’m bisexual, not that I really need to explain myself to you,” she stated, firmly.

Paul leaned in, like they were old friends just shooting the shit, and nudged her arm with his elbow. “Oh, does that mean you’d do it with a guy and a girl at the same time? Is that what you guys are looking for? Because I’m totally in.”

Cosima couldn’t keep to herself anymore. She stepped forward, putting herself in between Paul and Delphine. “Alrighty Paul, I think you’ve established your ignorance perfectly well. You should probably be going now,” she told him with a fake smile.

Paul looked offended, thinking what he said was just fine. “What? It’s a perfectly valid question. She’s bi, isn’t she?”

Cosima’s rage bubbled up and she took another step toward him, the size difference between them almost laughable, but she didn’t care. “Ok, you really want to get into this now, don’t you?” she spat, getting into his face. “This isn’t about you and your dick. Bisexual women don’t exist just so you can sleep with two women at once. And no, we don’t want you to watch. No, we don’t want you anywhere near us. We’re perfectly satisfied in a way I’m sure no girl has ever been with you.”

Paul’s mouth fell open. “Jeez, you’re a jerk!” he responded.

“I’m the jerk? Why don’t you go back to your job before I report you to daddy?” Cosima fumed.

“Whatever,” Paul muttered and walked away.

Cosima stared as she watched him, her mind coming back to reality as she turned around to look at Delphine.

Delphine’s mouth was open as well, a stunned look on her face.

“Ugh, men like that infuriate me,” she huffed before stepping close to Delphine and looking up at her. She took her hands in hers. “Sorry, was that too much?”

Delphine shook her head and smirked, leaning in toward Cosima’s ear. “No, it was sexy. I like when you defend me like that. Can I take you home and show you my gratitude?”

Cosima felt a shiver run down her spine as she bit her lip. “Uh, yeah you can.”

---

As soon as they walked into the apartment, Delphine closed the door and grabbed Cosima’s hips, pushing her forcefully against the wall and pressing the length of her body against the smaller woman as she kissed her. Cosima felt a surge of desire run through her as she fervently returned the kiss, loving that Delphine was taking control.

Cosima tried to move her hands to Delphine’s back but the blonde was faster and gripped Cosima’s wrists, bringing her hands above her head against the wall, leaving her open and vulnerable. Cosima moaned as Delphine bit down on her neck before bringing her mouth to the brunette’s ear.

“You look so fucking sexy in that dress,” Delphine breathed, “I’ve wanted to fuck you all night.”

“Holy shit,” Cosima groaned, Delphine’s boldness making her knees give out. Over the past few months, Delphine had become more and more daring, and Cosima especially loved when she talked dirty to her.

Cosima tried to move her hands, but Delphine had her in an iron grip. “Ah, ah,” the blonde teased, “You’re mine.” She tried to press her thigh in between Cosima’s legs but her dress was too tight to get where she wanted to.

Cosima moaned, pressing herself forward as Delphine chuckled. “I guess we’re going to have to do something about this dress,” she groaned. She pulled Cosima’s hands away from the wall and led her to the bedroom.

Once they got to the room, Delphine unzipped Cosima’s dress, undoing her own and slipping both off, leaving the two women in only their underwear.

Cosima stepped toward Delphine, trying to pull her close, but Delphine pushed her back onto the bed, climbing on top immediately and attacking her lips. She reached her hand down to graze over Cosima’s underwear, feeling her wetness through the fabric.

Cosima gasped, shivers running through her as her hips bucked up involuntarily.

Delphine took her hand away and Cosima whimpered. She began kissing down her body roughly, sucking on her skin in all the places she knew Cosima loved. She moved lower, pulling Cosima’s underwear off before coming back up to suck at her pulse point, her finger moving to run up through her wetness.

“Fuck, Delphine,” Cosima panted, opening her legs wider.

“That’s right. I’m going to eat you until you come in my mouth,” Delphine whispered in her ear.

“Oh my god,” Cosima moaned, as she felt her desire grow. “Jesus, Del.”

Delphine moved lower, situating herself between Cosima’s legs and pressing her mouth to her core, lightly at first, flicking and teasing, listening to the brunette’s reactions.

Cosima felt the pleasure radiate as she threw her head back, letting out a series of moans and whimpers. She bent her knees, letting them fall open, as she tangled her hand in Delphine’s curls, urging her on. Delphine’s hot, wet mouth was making her feel incredible.

Delphine stuck to her motions, letting Cosima’s hips dictate the intensity of the pressure as she enveloped Cosima’s clit in her mouth. The moment she heard Cosima’s breathing pick up, she inserted her finger, thrusting mercilessly as she knew the brunette was close.

“Ungg...ohhh,” Cosima moaned loudly, her mind only focused on Delphine’s skillful tongue and nimble fingers. “I’m close...oh god,” she breathed.

Delphine kept up her rhythm until Cosima broke, grunting and panting, her hand digging into Delphine’s head as her hips jolted into the blonde’s face.

Cosima tugged at Delphine’s head, jerking her hips away as her body got too sensitive and Delphine let out a small gasp at her hair being pulled.

“Oh, shit...fuck,” Cosima panted, “Shit, sorry, did I hurt you?”

Delphine looked up at her. “No, no it’s ok,” she chuckled, as she pulled out, coming back up to Cosima’s face. “I love making you come,” she whispered before kissing her, Cosima tasting herself on Delphine’s lips and moaning.

Cosima pulled back, catching her breath, her body in a blissful state. “Ok, if you talk to me like that when you fuck me,” she breathed, “Well...fuck…” She wrapped her arms around Delphine and pressed close to her, unable to come up with any words to describe her feelings.

Delphine giggled and kissed her cheek before laying her head down on her shoulder. “Good?”

“Fuck yeah,” Cosima answered.

“My goodness, you become such a potty mouth when my fingers are inside you,” Delphine teased.

Cosima laughed. “Is this what I get when I stand up for you? Because if so, I’ll definitely do it more often.”

“Well, it didn’t hurt,” she smiled, “It was hot, you getting all defensive.”

“I’m guessing you may need some attention then,” Cosima smirked, moving her hand slowly down between them, her fingers grazing Delphine’s stomach on the way down before she reached her destination. She found slick folds and moaned. “Fuuuuck, Del, you’re so wet.”

“I am aching for you,” Delphine whispered.

Cosima didn’t wait any longer. She got a surge of energy, flipping them over so she was on top, pulling off Delphine’s panties and letting her fingers glide over the wet skin as the blonde groaned underneath her.

“Yes,” Delphine panted, “Please.”

“Tell me exactly what you want,” Cosima whispered, nibbling on her earlobe.

“I want to feel you inside,” Delphine pleaded, “I need you to fuck me.”

Cosima knew her girlfriend was more than ready for her as she thrust a finger in, adding a second one after a moment, causing Delphine’s hips to jolt up and a series of whimpers to come out of her mouth. Cosima laid her torso on top of the blonde’s as she fucked her, giving her as much skin contact as possible. Delphine gripped at her back, digging her fingers in hard enough to leave a mark.

“Yes, yes,” Delphine breathed, “Oh, yes.”

Cosima gently grazed Delphine’s straining clit with her thumb to gauge the blonde’s reaction and when she groaned, she did it again.

She kept at it, sucking at Delphine’s neck as she brought her body closer to its peak. She knew Delphine wouldn’t last much longer as her breathing sped up, her pulse racing. “Come for me,” she ordered, “Come.”

Delphine had little control over her body as she came hard in Cosima’s hand, groaning as her body reached its maximum pleasure. She shook in Cosima’s arms, doing her best to hold onto her.

Her body finally fell limp and she smiled, chuckling to herself with her eyes closed.

Cosima wrapped her arm over Delphine’s torso and buried her face in her neck. “I. Love. You.” she whispered slowly, emphasizing each word.

“Mmm,” Delphine replied, unable to move a single muscle in her feeling of ecstasy.

Cosima smiled into soft skin and closed her eyes. “Thanks for tonight, baby,” she whispered, “I love being with you.”

Delphine smiled and took a deep breath. “Me too,” she spoke softly.

“God, you’ve exhausted me,” Cosima chuckled.

“Sleep, my love,” she whispered.

Cosima hummed, perfectly content to snuggle up to Delphine, the only person she ever wanted in this world. Her heart felt full and happy as she fell asleep.

---

January 2032

Cosima woke up to find the bed empty. She stretched and sauntered into the kitchen, seeing that Delphine had already made coffee. She noticed blonde curls outside the window on the front porch. She poured herself a cup of coffee and walked through the screen door to find her partner sitting, reading a book on their porch swing. Cosima grinned wide and sat next to her, placing her coffee on the table next to her.

“Morning, cutie,” she smiled.

“Morning, chėrie,” Delphine replied, leaning over to give her a kiss.

Cosima leaned back, enjoying the cool breeze. “We did it, Del.”

“Hmm?” Delphine asked, putting her book in her lap.

“We have a house,” Cosima grinned, her eyes gleaming.

They had moved in a few weeks ago, and were finally feeling like they had everything unpacked. It had been a lot of work, especially with both of them so busy at their jobs, but they got through it, and the payoff was worth it.

“It is so nice,” Delphine cooed, moving closer to wrap her arm around Cosima’s shoulders.

“Yeah, it is,” Cosima whispered, leaning her head on Delphine’s chest. She took a deep breath, feeling relaxed for the first time in a while, after being stressed out for so long.

Delphine planted a gentle kiss on Cosima’s forehead. “You know, we’ve been together for six years now,” she told her.

“Yeah, but it kind of feels like we’ve been together for like, 30 years, doesn’t it?” Cosima joked.

Delphine giggled. “Ah yes, this relationship has taken its toll on me,” she teased.

“You?” Cosima laughed, “What about me? I’ve been in love with you for 30 years!”

Delphine sighed. “So have I. It just took me a long time to admit it to myself,” she said, a more solemn tone in her voice.

Cosima grabbed her hand and squeezed gently. “But you did. And damn, am I grateful,” she chuckled.

Delphine took a deep breath. “Cosima,” she started, “Did you ever think...would you ever want to get married?”

Cosima sat up, looking into Delphine’s eyes intensely. “Wait, are you asking me to marry you?”

Delphine chuckled nervously. “I just wanted to bring it up. It’s been on my mind.”

“Oh, wow, I just thought...I don’t know, I didn’t think you’d want to get married again,” Cosima stated.

“Cosima, I was so young the first time I got married,” Delphine told her, “And I thought, maybe we could talk about it.”

Cosima grinned, pulling Delphine closer and rubbing their noses together. “Del, I would love to marry you,” she whispered.

“Yeah?” Delphine smiled.

“Yeah, you’re my life,” Cosima explained, “And I want you forever, and while we don’t necessarily need a piece of paper that says it, I wouldn’t mind.”

Delphine gripped the sides of Cosima’s head and pulled her in, pressing her lips to the brunette’s. “I want that too,” she breathed.

Cosima giggled, her love for the woman in front of her coursing through her. She couldn’t believe how this woman made her feel, even after all these years.

“I was thinking...I mean, if you want something else, please tell me...but maybe, we could just go to the courthouse and get married, just me and you, something special for just the two of us,” Delphine told her.

“That sounds absolutely perfect,” Cosima replied, “I don’t have any desire to have a big wedding or anything.” She brought her knees up to her chest, nuzzling into Delphine’s side as the blonde wrapped her arms completely around her.

“Ok,” Delphine smiled, “Just the two of us.”

Cosima let out a contented sigh. This was her happy place, lying in Delphine’s arms, feeling the blonde’s heart beat against her skin, listening to her slow breathing, rubbing gently at the back of her hand with her thumb. This was everything to her.

“I love you, Cosima,” Delphine whispered, squeezing tightly.

Cosima closed her eyes to memorize the feeling.

“I love you, too, Del.”

---

#Cophine #cophine fanfic #cophine fic #cosima niehaus #cosima x delphine #delphine cormier #Orphan Black #orphan black fic #ob

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castawxayaway · 8 years ago

Text

One Sided: A Twitter Series, Part Four

Much longer part today, story is developing now so I’m excited. Thank you for the love and asks- enjoy!

one / two / three / four / five / six / seven

masterlist

6:55am, 26.7.16

Waking up after having less than two hours of sleep is never easy, especially when you commit to do something that requires leaving the house at 8am. Forcing the heavy duvet that consumes me and calls my name that mutters sweet nothings into my ears in attempt to convince me to stay I sit upright, instantly regretting it. The usual dragging feeling spreads through my body, the heaviness from lack of sleep returns and the lamps still being visible through the blinds never makes me feel happy.

Placing my feet against the bitty carpet goosebumps become visible as they wrap themselves around my bare legs, the cold air attacking my exposed skin with all it had and the urge to be warm under the duvet was irresistible. I hold onto the duvet, the constant battle I have with myself everyday, regardless of having commitments or not.

It’s been too long now, yet no one gets it really- I’m not tired, I’m exhausted and done. Taking my phone off of charge I slip on my Dad’s old fleece I sort of permanently borrowed, despite how ugly it is you can’t beat the comfort and thickness of it. Heading downstairs for breakfast I scroll past notifications, see if anyone has answered my messages- not that I’m expecting to see Ashton on my feed, as if.

Clicking on my messages I see three new messages, all from Maddie. Maddie had a bit of a habit of rant texting or ensuring I know of all the plans and details for the day ahead.

6am: So I will see you on the bus at 8:10 as I’m getting on a different stop.

6:02am: Why aren’t you answering? You are always on your phone. Ugh, the others know so just meet them at the stop.

6:09am: How are you anyway?

Laughing to myself I shake my head at Maddie’s messages, always as frantic as ever before, but that’s friends for you. Slowly I got ready for the day ahead, knowing it would be a long one and the wait for brunch would be excruciating considering the rumbling of my stomach now and it’s only 7:10.

Groaning I pick up my phone and aimlessly scroll through social media as I sip at my tea before heading upstairs, phone still in hand and the same four apps to rotate between. Putting my phone down I quickly get ready knowing how early Emma will be and Spencer will shortly follow.

7:18am: Hey guys, don’t worry I won’t be late- I’ll see you at the bus stop at 7:50?

Following my message to the group they all reply within minutes, consisting of ‘sure you will’ and ‘hurry up.’ I roll my eyes and pick up the pace, knowing they are as eager as me to eat something. Just as I finish getting ready and grab my bag I run down the stairs, grab my boots and slip them on and yell a goodbye to my parents.

As I close the front door behind me I sigh, seeing the sky still laced with the remainder of the night as it begins to fade away and be replaced with the colours of joy and new beginnings. Wishing I had opted to wear jeans over a skirt I wrap my jacket tighter around myself and plug my earphones in, shutting the world out.

The short walk to the bus stop allows me to think about a few things, different things than the thoughts that occur when I can’t sleep. I play over what happened last night and pause, did that actually happen? Feeling for my phone in my pocket I pull it out and click on the app, praying it was just a dream, but what if I actually said that to him? Why would I think he’d care?

My fingertips tremble as I press the small envelope and see at the top of my messages;

You and ASHTON IRWIN.

“What?” I mutter to myself as I stand on the edge of the curb, completely confused and slightly proud of myself for managing this, pulling something off so unlike myself. “Right, right.” Nodding I continue walking and daydream about what I could write to him, should I even write to him? Is that weird?

Shaking the thoughts away I near the bus stop and see no other figures hanging around. For once I’m the early bird outside of her nest. I lean against the frame of the small shelter patiently waiting for them to turn up to join me, glancing up I see the glowing orange writing on the screen, ‘TEN MINUTES.’

Debating in my mind what to say I look either side of me, I mean, no one is here to judge me so why not?

7:52am: Hi Ashton, morning I guess.

7:52am: Actually I have no idea what time it is for you right now, but if it’s night time as I’m presuming I hope you’re sleeping or just relaxing.

7:52am: Thank you for well, nevermind.

“Woah, you’re here before us?” Emma laughed as I slipped my phone back into my pocket and turned to face her. Shifting my focus from her I saw a car park opposite and Spencer climbed out, talking to Adam- her boyfriend since we were kids.

Shrugging my shoulders we both sat down on the awkwardly thin bench angled to ensure discomfort whilst we waited for the bus and Spencer, both betting which would arrive first.

8:01am: Hey, you almost here?

8:01am: We’re just a few minutes away, upstairs towards the back of the bus Maddie :)

8:01am: Good as I’m cold and got a lot to tell you.

As always Maddie has a story, I show the message to the others and we all share a knowing look. “Why am I not surprised?” Spencer speaks up and laughs lightly to herself.

Once Maddie gets on and clocks onto where we are sat I move along to the window seat. She sits down next to me exhaling loudly, less than 2 seconds and she’s already irritated by something, I think this is her personal best. “Everything alright Mads?” I speak up and look to the others who shake their heads and turn to have their own conversation, meaning it’s up to me to take the weight of her troubles yet again.

“Ugh it’s just this bus and how it was late and it’s raining.” I could see her lips moving and the faint sound of her whines but my ears wouldn’t tune in to the drabble she spoke.

No matter how hard I tried to tell myself to listen I couldn’t help but zone out, not that Maddie would notice as she is too wrapped up in her eventful morning, all two hours of it. “-and then he finally let me on.” Lifting her hands up in annoyance she just scoffed, I assumed she finished and I shook my head, trying to act as if I knew all she said.

“Awful.” Trying to mimic her tone she nodded in agreement.

Problem with being the one who doesn’t sleep means when others can’t sleep I’m usually the first person they turn to, and the one they confide in. Yet most of the time I can barely focus on their written words, what bothers them about petty things. Instead all I can think about is the bigger matters, life, death, the future, the inevitable, anything else.

Maddie turned to talk to Spencer and I happily observed life outside of the bus window. Dotted in rain droplets it altered my vision and perception of how everything was that we passed by in a hurry, from Mums with push chairs to teenagers listening to music and elders hand in hand; just life.

8:26am: Ever think about life on the road? What you see outside and how you can’t interfere or be apart of it, no matter how badly you want to?

Sending the short message I lock my phone again, unsure why of all people to talk to I opt to a dead end rather than Maddie, Emma, Spencer, Anna even. Zoning out entirely as my eyes fixate on the droplets of rain and how they have clung to the window like cement Maddie taps my shoulder as she stands up, getting off of the bus.

Once we get outside we walk down the road to the cafe which is unexpectedly bigger as you go up the narrow creaky staircase and past the old movie posters and local acts performing in the theatre. The smell of pastries and coffee beans brings a smile to my face as we find a table quickly, relaxing into the comfy wooden back and plump cushion I sit on.

“Chocolate tea or plain tea?” Emma asks as she is intrigued by the idea of chocolate tea, something so unheard of her green eyes glisten with pure fascination.

Maddie rests her head in her hands, “Be adventurous.”

Emma and Maddie go first to order, leaving me and Spencer to wait a little bit longer. “How many hours last night?” She spoke up as I rubbed my eyes.

Spencer has known me since we were 2, our Mums went to the same Doctor and somehow met there. I’d always known her but was never close until we were around 10, from then on in we’ve been inseparable- except when she’s with Adam. And since she has known me for years she knows me inside and out, being one of the few to know about my sleep problem.

Sighing I cross my arms on the table and bury my head in the soft darkness for a little while, drown out the chatter of the early morning. I simply raise two fingers up and hear a loud sigh. “You need to tell someone about it, it’s gone on too long.” I ignore her comment as always, what good will telling someone do? Last time I tried to tell someone it didn’t go so well as they didn’t believe a word I said and blamed it on lack of exercise.

Lifting my head up I gave her a small smile, she knew I wouldn’t talk about it unless it was in a jokey manner. Truth is it hurts too much.

Maddie and Emma come over laughing and sit back down, “Bless him must be his first day on the job.” Emma chuckled.

“What happened?” I spoke up wanting to find a way to feel more energised, if anyone could make me feel jolly and distract me it would be these guys.

Emma nodded to Maddie who struggled to hold back her laughs, “We think there’s a new barista there and we ordered chocolate tea and he, he picked up a carton of milk and didn’t know the lid wasn’t on and he spun it around and-” I could see her cheeks tinting red, the luminous colour of the raspberry sauce displayed next to the menus on our table. “it went all over the counter, the coffee machine, partly on him and.”

“and the cashiers back.” Emma finished as Maddie hid her face only showing her shoulders going up and down. “Oh, the look on the cashier’s face just said it all.” Emma shook her head and pulled a very fed up and pissed off expression, I glanced over to Spencer and she shrugged her shoulders whilst the other two were unable to control themselves.

“Well,” Spencer stood up and looked my way, “we better go order something to eat, I can hear your stomach from here.” She motioned for me to join her and we headed down the creaky stairs in silence towards the chatter of plates and whirring of the coffee machine.

As we queue up I glance up to see the enlarged menu above the coffee machine splattered in milk and can’t help but nudge Spencer to see. Both of us share a mischievous smile until I’m called to the counter, unaware of being next in line. “Hi, how are you today?” I speak up, fighting back the tiredness that is lacing around my eyes and trickling through my body, making it feel heavier than it is. Talking like this, small talk can help, fight the urge to close my eyes and embrace a positive conversation- no matter how short it may be.

“Oh.” I hear him speak up and as I look up I smile to him. Hair the colour of a strongly brewed cup of tea and eyes as bright as the green grass I wish to see in the summer along with a shy smile he wears. “It’s erm, it’s been good- well besides spilling milk everywhere.” He lets out a nervous laugh and I do the whole smiling to myself and look at my feet then back at him thing, something I do to break eye contact before it gets awkward.

“You’re the milk person then, guess the cashier went to change?” I joked and he laughed in response and leant over the till.

His face was close to mine and up close I could see the flecks of amber running around those green eyes, it was unusual, but I liked it. “He was trying to impress the girl he was serving and I sort of screwed up his plan when she burst out laughing at him.” I chuckled in response as he smiled brightly at my laugh. “You have a great laugh.” He beamed to me and I moved away from the counter, leaning my hands against it as I focused on the menu board above.

“Can I get the summer berry pancakes and a breakfast tea please?” I moved the conversation on as a wave of sleep smacked me square on, the desire for food and caffeine increased and I felt someone touch my arm. Turning I saw Spencer look at me with concern, I merely shook my head and she took her hand away.

The milk guy told the others my order and then focused back on me with a bright smile, one that wasn’t there two minutes ago. “Do you have a stamp card?” I raised an eyebrow to him and he picked one up. “Here, let me just stamp this and basically if you come back you collect stamps yada yada yada free brunch.” My eyes went wide with excitement at the thought of free brunch, I knew I must’ve looked like a kid in Disneyland but one can never say no to free food.

“I’m always up for free food.” I cannot hide my smile as he passed me my stamp card and I slipped it into my purse. Looking back to him his smile was gone and replaced by a disheartened expression.

“I’ll erm, your food will be brought up to you. Enjoy.” He waved me off with less enthusiasm and I wondered what happened in that split second, shrugging it off I headed back upstairs and was quickly followed by Spencer.

“You know,” She spoke up as I kept on walking up towards the window on the landing before the next flight of stairs. “you’ve never been good at knowing when a guy flirts have you?” I can feel my cheeks burning up and shrug it off.

“He wasn’t flirting Spencer, not everyone is instantly a flirt just because you are.” I joke and continue walking on up towards the others.

“Oh come on, you didn’t see the smile he had, how he complimented your laugh or how he looked at your eyes with a similar look Adam has at doughnuts.

Stopping I turn back to face her, “You’re comparing my face to doughnuts?” Sighing I continue walking towards our table as she apologises profusely, realising the poor example she used.

Everyone continues to chatter whilst I check my phone quickly and type a short message, needing to get it off my chest.

8:47am: Ever been compared to something less than complimentary, degrading even?

8:47am: As I was just compared to a doughnut, morning off to a good start.

Smiling to the message I lock my phone and see all eyes focused on me. “What?” I ask and they still keep their eyes fixated on mine, an element of curiosity about them.

“Why are you smiling to your phone, you normally get annoyed by it.” Emma speaks up and I place it face down on the table.

“It’s nothing really.” I say but Maddie and Spencer raise an eyebrow, then all three of them move closer, clearly not buying it. “Fine.” Sighing I move my hair out of my face and rest my head in my hand. “I am messaging Ashton Irwin.” I state it as if it were nothing exciting, so bluntly it could not even cut butter.

They don’t respond immediately like I expected them to, instead they stay quiet and wear similar perplexed looks. “You know, Ashton the drummer?” I try yet they still seem non responsive. “From 5 Seconds of Summer?” Then they let out a small ‘O’ and then nothing.

“How the hell did you get to message him of all people?” Maddie asked completely shocked and almost in a state of disbelief.

I began to explain a condensed version of last night, missing out on the insomnia aspect and more that I just couldn’t get to sleep and by the time I was finished it seemed as if no one believed it. “That sort of thing doesn’t just happen, come on.” Maddie looked away awkwardly and I glanced to the others but they too avoided eye contact.

“Well I’ll show you.” Just as I went onto Twitter our food and drinks came. “I’ll show you later.” I piped up as my mouth began to water at the sight of fluffy pancakes drizzled in a berry compote and fresh berries between stacks.

As we headed down the stairs of the cafe we thanked the staff and headed on out. “Miss? Erm berry pancake person?” Someone apprehensively called out and the four of us turned around, slightly confused as to why we were being summoned. “You.” He pointed to me and I felt insecure and worried as to why I was being pinpointed.

“Did I do something wrong? I did pay!” I exclaim as I begin to search through my purse for my receipt, Spencer agreeing with me stating how she saw me pay.

“No no Miss, it’s nothing to do with that!” He faffed in front of my purse and I held it to my side, letting out a sigh of relief. “Just, just check your stamp card, you’ll thank us later.” He smiled and wished us a good day and headed back inside the cafe.

We all looked at each other with confused expressions, “Well that was weird.” I joked and continued walking yet the others remained stationary. “What?” Lifting my arms up they all focused on my purse, not saying anything. “Yeah like there’s something on my card out of everyone’s.” I mumbled under my breath as I pulled my stamp card out and saw the small tea shaped stamp, the others quickly huddled around. “See? Nothing.” I passed it to them and continued walking with not a single care as I was awake, wide awake.

“Call me, Daniel?!” Spencer yelled and I turned on my heels and saw the shocked expressions on their faces. Titling my head she held it up and I took the few steps towards it and saw a name and a number scribbled down. “The milk guy do you think?” She beamed and I shrugged my shoulders taking it in my grasp.

“I, I don’t know.” I mumbled and put the card in my pocket next to my phone, “guess I’ll find out later.” Smiling to them we walked on, hoping to enjoy this short burst of sunshine before the clouds form again.

#5sos #twitter series #5 seconds of summer #5sos imagines #5sos series #5 seconds of summer imagines #imagines #preferences #5sos ashton #ashton irwin #ashton irwin imagines #5sos preferences #ashton #5sos writing #series #writing #twitter dms #afi

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