#honestly thought thered be more but eh im not complaining

[biohazard-inevitable]

“So what’d you do over winter break?”

Got through 2 one piece arcs why

[narwhalandchill]

ok misc stream thoughts!!!

ANYWAY livestream over nice 30 pulls of aventurine funds for anni!!!! they didnt do anything insane but honestly it was kinda cope to expect them to, ratio for free was clearly a more of a spontaneous move and hes available throughout anniversary anyway so the "another 5*" were.... a little over the top im sorry wjkjwdjkwdjk altho i wouldnt have complained obviously. a free himeko or sth couldve been on theme for the cosmodussy event but eh cant be helped

im actually glad for the skippability of the reruns 😭😭 like i have luocha n jingliu (+ LC for latter) so by skipping acheron for now im gonna have a nice time getting aventurine and most likely his LC (2/3 of his 4* LC selection is so sad tho), love that fucker hope he gets to do proper mayhem in story too. cool death talk please dont actually die yourself for real for real tho i will be sad. like i do think its based of aventurine to pull off a stunt that appears to be what we in the business might call a certified chapter 5 komaeda moment but. ahahaha nooo dont actually die youre such a funny hat man .

(also sick boss form is sick but . bootleg FL im sorry aventurine. they hit perfection already and theyre never fucking topping the galaxy cape cyclops eye beak mask drip i swear JSWJWJDKWJKDWJK but also yes me biased? in favor of that ginger? i could never)

but it seems ill have a solid time getting aventurine and saving up for now??? since i dont think im too interested in robin or boothill either. i was kinda worried topaz' rerun would be in 2.1 for IPC antics with aventurine bc i am kinda curious abt pulling for her but now its gonna be 2.2 at the earliest so. Phew

the stream ran a bit too long lmao but like overall i tend to like the dev discussions so most of it was still neat, altho downside of dev streams is that not knowing chinese i cant just like. afk and listen on headphones and go get water or something 💀💀 and they were definitely dragging stuff out on purpose no way they werent but eh. people will live its just bideo game livestream. and like these folks do hard work on the game they can yap about what they do sometimes its only right lmao

leakers public shaming session was definitely a jumpscare but i do genuinely empathize w shaoji on that one. like. ive always been one for kit + banner leaks first and foremost and story leaks just. i dont care for them much. ive had my share of looking at them occasionally but i definitely agree with the way story leaks either by themselves or when misconstrued and misinterpreted really fucking mess with the intended experience for any given story and how that must feel like shit for the writers. like if story leaks stopped happening altogether id be perfectly content. and thats just ppl who look at story leaks on purpose cuz. im not going to even begin w how like. yes the leaks subreddits and most big leakers do spoiler warnings and keep the story stuff spoilered. but then theres literally the entire rest of the internet where shit gets spread untagged and without warnings the second they are posted anywhere at all and how that fucking ruins peoples experiences. like its 1 thing to click at a spoiler tagged post knowingly and get ur experience messed up with. but when u dont even want to see it its rly fucking bad and i v well understand condemning all story leaks (even those properly flagged) just on that basis alone. but yeah actually felt bad for him there and see where he was coming from for sure, even as a consumer of leaks

ok well that sure was a wall of text. didnt expect to write that much JWJKWJKDDWJK but ya

Anyway. biggest priority is holding strong w skipping acheron as sick as her animations are but def looking forward to her teaser and the animated short. like . even with the black swan dykery. (that was a fucking jumpscare too). i dont need her rn. despite how cool she is 😭😭

& also have to say im v happy they clarified their stance on hi3rd references like. the way theyre going abt it is absolutely how it should be going. hsr by nature is more directly linked to hi3rd like honkai is in the name but its such a dumbass idea (like some fan takes out there....) to want the stories of hsr depend on another games lore. rewarding old fans with easter eggs and tidbits is perfectly fine and im even interested in seeing where they go with acherons obvious raiden situation - especially knowing theyre not about to ruin their own story with "it was hi3rd all along!" (not that i ever rly thought theyd seriously blunder that bad lmao 💀) . so yea thats neat

i think story wise im not gonna say much of my thoughts bc unfortunately i have clicked on like. a leak or four. not the major stuff i dont think but enough that commenting on stuff w some of the things im aware of in the periphery is going to tint stuff . but im still excited to see where things go!!!

AAND OH. ACTUALLY i do have one more thing . so the multiple POV thing being actually implemented is SOOOO good im so fucking happy theyre committing to it being a thing 😭😭😭 like SO many story pitfalls can be avoided by just letting it be that TB doesnt need to be fucking everywhere a major thing happens as the centerpiece of events so we as players can see it. like it gives a way of showing different events and sides of characters in a much more natural manner its sooo good that theyre implementing it already. like this alone has me in such high hopes for the story going forward. like yea theyve branched from our POV before already and in penacony as well but expanding on it even more is 100% the correct way forward

last thing: god they did jingliu so dirty in her concert illustration. WHAT is she wearing 💀💀💀anyway yeah lesgo 2.1 its cool

i lied real last thing: siobhan . siobhan i would do anything---

[wc-wild-rewrite]

Fire and Ice reread!

I didnt enjoy this nearly as much as the first book, so 7/10, i give my reasonings in the My Thoughts section. The writing is less clunky in the way its written, but the writing itself is, eh, its not terrible but its not book 1 standard.

On the bright side, i'm loving Windclan and the thunderclan apprentices.

Prolouge

Poor morningflower, having to give birth road-side without her mate

Its been nearly a moon since windclan was driven out, so they were there when rusty joined thunderclan

Deadfoot my beloved

Honestly ashfoot your complaining isnt unjustified, id be mad too

Chapter 1

They need to grow in their leafbare fur, interesting! Probably never brought up again though

"After many moons as an apprentice" its been 4 moons max, and you spent one of those moons not actually training, how did you even qualify for this

Ah yes, exposition monolouge on what happened the previous book

God i love how respectful whitestorm is

"Only been warriors for a few days" you literally just finished your vigil, dude, its not even been a whole day

Honor is a big thing for the clans

I like the idea of longtail just walking around camp giving the least subtle hints for days on end

Aww swiftpaw was so anxious for his ceremony, thats adorable

Way to have double standards, longtail. Still love you tho

And theres the full moon

Ah, more exposition, on lionheart this time. Thank you, erins, we get it, we did read the last book

Interesting how easily bluestar takes ravenpaw's leaving. I mean, not the tigerclaw part, but the leaving the clan part.

Chapter 2

Whitestorm still being respectful, even to the enemy

Oh no, whiteclaw, your not gonna see the end of this book

Yeah, so he did spend a moon looking after her

Im shocked Tigerclaw wants Windclan back

Chapter 3

Slow slug

Yellowfang seems rather chipper today

Chapter 4

As of the gathering, its been two moons since windclan was driven out

They have wood ants

They know what a year is

Apparently windclan doesnt patrol its borders often

Chapter 5

Ok so this generstion of windclan cats are DEFINITELY traumatised

I can't imagine tnp journey is gonna go well for them

I admire their sturdiness though, still willing to fight despite everything

Chapter 6

Ooo smart move, Fireheart, asking to go with them instead of offering help

Gorsekit is officially a little creature

Deadfoot!! My boy!!

I love fireheart's comeback to the apprentice

Aww barley likes sharing food with his boyfriend

Chapter 7

I love deadfoot so much, little blorbo man

Damn ok riverclan chill out

"Lame warrior" can we not

But also yess tigerclaw save my boy

Chapter 8

Oh no, whiteclaw!

Yess willowpelt protect your son

I wonder how much the story would've changed if sandpaw had dropped instead of whiteclaw, or both of them

Tigerclaw i see you trying to get your cronies new apprentices

I hope fireheart and greystripe share the story with the elders, i like them

Ok apparently brackenpaw is ginger now

Awww cinderpaw babie girl

Lil moody brackenpaw there, love him

But also they are like 4 moons didnt we just learn this was bad

Chapter 9

Honestly it is so irresponsible for bluestar to make these two mentors, they are like 10 moons at best, theres only 6 moons between them and their apprentices

Someone get Greystripe in therapy

Queens tell boogeyman stories of kit-snatching owls

Again, tree scaling, this time by smallear

Aw cinderpaw, my adhd babie girl

"When you brought them home" girl that was you, you were that kit. I know this is a writing error but i like to think its a mental disconnection due to the trauma of it

God, the "that cat in the forest...was his sister!" Is such a 2009 writing style

Chapter 10

Rip tulipkit, i think your the first of that litter to die

I wonder if fern and ash ever remembered their littermate

I love the difference between cinderpaw's wild bounding and brackenpaw's careful thinking

Awww princess and fireheart bonding is so cute

Chapter 11

Aw i like seeing them mentor, its so cute

Greystripe u kitten

Silverstream!!

"Cant you drown in your own territory" your honor i love her

Haha mischeivous cinderpaw

Chapter 12

Cinderpaw is a good liar confirmed

"Where were you when i was training" asked fireheart, the liar. "I found somewhere quiet to rest" said greystripe, also a liar

I cant tell if tigerclaw really is that observant or firepaw is just the king of overthinking

Brackenpaw's such a nerd i love him

Cinderpaw sweetie your adorable but please dont sneak up on your mentor

Chapter 13

They lost 5 kits to greencough last year, we never get info about them

Still very interesting that each prey has its own stalking technique

Chapter 14

"He was breaking the code by meeting up with another cat" oh really, sound familiar buddy?

Fuck it, im with greystripe, go see your code-breaking girlfriend

Since when the fuck has speckletail had a kit, but also hi mistlekit!!

Chapter 15

Dude your a hypocrite stop yelling at your bestie's girlfriend

But i do like how leader's daughter seems to be an important title

Silverstream's got a point, their love isnt affecting anyone

Ohhh the tabby kit was mistlekit

Ok damn why is dustpaw so aggressive

I wonder how dustpaw feels, technically being the cause behind cinderpaw's injury

Chapter 16

Explicitily described as twisted, noted

Chapter 17

Tigerclaw honestly didnt mean to, huh.

So now theres two kits with whitecough

Oh willowpelt absolutely heard that

Chapter 18

Unfortunately, fireheart, i gotta agree, its frustating watching people react to tragedies and just move on

Chapter 19

You've changed your tune awfully fast, Sandpaw, are we gonna get a reason for that or do we have to guess?

Willowpelt feels like shes covering for her son, but im definitely looking too far into it

These patrols are always longtail, darkstripe, and willowpelt. I know they probably just dont have any other warriors but its suspicious

Chapter 20

Oop, greystripe got sent to his room

Goddamn dustpaw chill out

Chapter 21

Princess honey you cant just spring this on a cat

Oh shes so sweet

Aaaand heres the ooc writing, this doesnt make sense

"It'll be at least 5 moons" would you rather he bring in a 5 moon old kit whos already adjusted to kittypet life?

Ah, there goes elderkit

At least the queens have some compassion

Ah, tom's first panic attack

Chapter 22

Has it been one moon or two? Im not sure

Cinderpaw i still love you

Asha and fern recently stopped nursing, meaning their about a moon old. Only a moon's differemce between them and cloud, then

"With all that white fur" what, like Frostfur? Or Whitestorm? Shut the fuck up, darkstripe

Chapter 23

Yeah, so its been 2 moons since the gorge fight

Deadfoot!!!

Yeah ya'll better shut up, starclan's displeased

Chapter 24

I still dont think fireheart would be this against greystripe's relationship

Ok no yeah fireheart's definitely overthinking this, he was talking about the mossball, dude

Chapter 25

Again! Willowpelt and Darkstripe in the same patrol

I can see Whitestorm being really pissed off at disrespect like this

Tigerclaw really doesnt think before he acts, huh

Good brackenpaw, run boy, run!

Hello brokenstar, you mangy motherfucker

Chapter 26

Spottedleaf's death was six moons ago, though this feels incorrect

Also fireheart, dude, you barely knew her

Kick their ass, frostfur! Kick their ass!

I nearly forgot yellowfang was a warrior before a medicine cat

Pathetic ass brokenstar, wheres your gloating now huh

Eugh can we not have this burden to the clan thing. Like shes allowed to feel like that, but only if the narrative shuts that shit down

Yay whitestorm back at it again being logical

Chapter 27

Yay, sandstorm and dustpelt!

I dont like dustpelt tbh but lets see if he redeems himself

Yeah, yellowfang, you shut that shit down!

Ok damn, greystripe, calm down, i dont even know why your angry anymore

Chapter 28

I might not like incredibly stubborn characters much, but i gotta give it to cloudkit, hes like a moon old and he caught a vole

Ugh i forgot spottedleaf is his messenger

Chapter 29

He just can't get it into his head that he's a hypocrite, huh?

What part of "dont leave the camp unguarded" was missed here, you just took every single warrior with you

Im not as fond as cloudkit as i am with cinder and bracken, but he knows what he wants

Chapter 30

Tigerclaw you arrogant bastard, i still love you though

I didnt see my boy deadfoot, where was he!!

About fuckin time these two reconcile, good god, this could've been sorted chapters ago

My thoughts

Eh, 7/10, a lot of it was just frustrating to read. Im really not a fan of miscommunication tropes or whatever hypocritcal shit was going on between fire and grey. Im also getting really sick of spottedleaf, The cloudkit being brought in scene was bad and weird, and dustpaw's just an asshole.

I liked the mentoring scenes, the apprentices, and yellowfang. I quite like brokenstar and tigerstar, even if their both bastards, and my boy whitestorm is still well written. I like that the queens are good fighters, and how supportive princess is of her brother. We didnt see much of runningwind but im fond of him. They still havent explained why sandstorm warmed up to him so suddenly, but its only book 2

Overall, a bit of a sour one, i definitely prefer the first book, out of the two, and i still think fire and ice should've been the name for the 6th book

[everydaydg]

While not perfect in any way.

Mazinger Z infinity is an enjoyable experience!

I enjoyed this quite a bit! I wasnt expecting much to begin with but hey! I had fun

Before I voice some complains, I want to say that I like this movie alot and I recommend it a fairrr bit.

okay with that in mind, heres a bunch of incoherent thoughts about the movie.

I will say its pacing was... not great. It went from real slow to real fast in the last 30 mins of the movie

(Honestly most of the movie feels like setup for those 30 minutes

and tbf that is the best part of the movie.)

Eh idk about the mazin girls. might be missing a reference or something but it is super blatant fan service. ah well its just on two scenes so it doesnt hurt much

it was interesting seeing Koji years after the fight against Dr.Hell. I like it! I get why he woudnt be as spunky as usual, him being more mature and all but he did seem a biiit off in some ways. maybe im just used to how he acts in Zero, Toei and Mazinkaiser

I liked the characters in general, I mean its mazinger, it already has a strong cast but I liked it.

Boss having a restaurant was cute

The CG animation is not half bad! even if I do feel it looks a bit cheap at times.

Mind you, im not saying "oooo this should have been 2D" indirectly, I love anime thats done with CG!

im saying that the CG sometimes look like the bike shots from kotetsushin which is... less than ideal

The advertising is not subtle at all LMAO

YALL WANNA DRIVE A NISAN- DUDE THERES SO MANY NISANS IN THIS MOVIE ITS NUTS. AND DONT THINK I DIDNT NOTICE THAT ONE LAPTOP LOL

I cant hate the movie if it has giant swing rocket punch

actually the movie evoided an issue I often find in OVAs and some series.

They utilize mazinger's arsenal to its full extent.

They even use southern cross knives... who even remembers that one, man

tetsuya (despite only having one fight scene) also has a surprisingly complete arsenal

Its great!

Overall 7/10

its fun! but you enjoyment kinda depends on if you are a fan of the series already

I can see myself coming back for those 30 minutes

[insomnihan]

han’s Entire Thoughts and Feelings on TWICE’s “Feel Special”

IM A ONCE I SWEAR-

im REALLY LATE BUT I CAN EXPLAIN im really living that College Life™ now and i literally dont have much time anymore for pretty much anything (rip to me but thats how it be) ANYWAY IM HERE NOW AND LIKE ALWAYS I HAVE THINGS TO SAY ABOUT THIS AMAZING GROUP AND THEIR TALENT ITS BEEN MARINATING IN MY BRAIN

there are no read mores here so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ALRIGHT SO-

THE SONG i had a VERY GOOD feeling when it came to this song and im not saying that as a Once™ like i just felt really good even just LISTENING TO THE TEASERS LIKE THIS👏WILL👏BE👏EVERYTHING👏 LEMME TALK ABOUT JUST HOW GLAMOROUS™??????? THIS SOUNDS?????? its somehow so soft but goes so hard at the exact same time and honestly i aM HERE FOR THAT KIND OF SONG- IM DIRECTLY REFERRING TO DAHYUNS RAP BREAK WHERE IT GOES HARD OUT OF NOWHERE I- can we talk about these lyrics?????? P L E A S E????? we love songs that sounds like its nice and light BUT the LYRICS BICTH lyrics filled with how the world could be against them and hurt them how they would be all alone and wanna hide and feel as if they could disappear and no one would care or notice that B U T they have pEOPLE AROUND THEM WHO LOVE THEM AND MAKE THEM FEEL WANTED (but not in a like ‘these people healed me’ kind of way but like in a more ‘these people make it easier to deal with it’ kind of way??????? i dont wanna sound too Big Stupid™ but anyway-) IM CRYING DONT LOOK AT ME-

OF COURSE THE DANCE IS ALWAYS GOOD AND LIKE ANY OTHER OF THEIR DANCES I STARTED FOLLOWING ALONG EVENTUALLY- when they raise their arms for ‘you make me feel special’ and that part in the middle with jihyo as the center with all that arm movement and just THE ENTIRETY of choreography during dahyuns part (and of course that move she does too during it but ive said enough) literally mess me up i swear- and then those moves near the end when theyre in the line and when momo was center that was EVERYTHING™

THE VISUALS their sets are just always Pretty™ right????? for this mv in particular i LOVE SPARKLE™ and SHINE™ and LIGHT™ so this entire mv was SO gorgeous and all this shiny golds and the glittery silvers and the various vibrant colors but its NOT OVERBEARING AND HURTS YOUR EYES ive stared at these sets for five hours now-

SOME SCENES THAT I LIKED AND WANNA MENTION:

LITERALLY EVERY DANCE SCENE: the gold set with the chandelier and the darker room with their more elegant dresses with ANOTHER chandelier and the one outside of the diner JUST VERY GOOD

uuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUH MINAS SCENE???????? HELLO??????? V BEAUTIFUL???????? V V BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tzuyus doll house literally all of those patterns and those colors im screaming internally why is it SO pretty AND the room momo was in with all the glass cases and just OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

diamond room??????? was that what nayeon was in??????? anyway SHINY™ and then jihyo is looking at her through all those millions of tv screens im sure that means something deep and i feel everyone figured out what that means so i wont go on

the diner (again I THINK) where sana is just sitting in front of i just like it al lot those colors were pleasing to my eyes (i feel like i should mention dahyuns umbrella during this and how the colors of it just sticks out i love that)

T H E M

DO I EVEN NEED TO SAY IT????????? THEYRE SO PRETTY?????????? JUST SO STUNNING AND BLESS MY EYES EVERY SINGLE TIME???????? the outfits the hair the makeup the colors given to them to wear the jewelry IM SO IN LOVE WITH HOW THEY LOOK IN THE MV i pretty much have nothing to complain or want to change like this like they are just so amazingly pretty i cant believe they are real and exist like this god thank you-

nayeon pls that sparkly pink outfit in the gold room with the puffy sleeves like by description it sounds ugly but i swear to you she looks incredible THE BLACK DRESS in that diamond or whatever room LITERALLY STOP THIS that white one with the big sleeves and the teal(????) hair and bangs....................... a little debatable i wont lie to you BUT SHES STILL KILLING IT- HOWEVER THE DRESS IN THE DARKER ROOM AND THAT F UCKING PURPLE SILKY ONE THANK YOU

jeongyeon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BACK AT IT AGAIN WITH SHORT HAIR i need to express how amazing she looked with that RED AND THAT BLACK AND BLUE ONE DURING THE DANCE SCENES BE QUIET!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the shimmery dance outfit with the flow-y pants AND the white one with the short skirt AND that light blue one during the diner dance scenes P L E A S E i cant- you used to be my bias dont Attack™ me like this

MOMO WHOS FOREHEAD WAS REVEALED AND EVERYONE COLLECTIVELY LOST THEIR MINDS (INCLUDING ME) this womans power i swear she nearly broke everyone!!!!!!!!!!! that black dress with the see through sleeves literALLY IM DYING- the pink dress with that sheer dress (??? i dunno how to describe that i-) the white dress THAT PURPLE ONE LEAVE ME ALONE- (also the braids in the side of her head......................... im- just yes)

PINK HAIRED SANA I WAS SHAKING FROM JUST THE TEASER just the black jacket and the shimmery silver skirt (i think) and those red boots..................... y e a h the white outfit that has one long sleeve and theres no sleeve on the other side pls- and then the pink two piece with those shimmery boots the black and blue ombre dress and the light blue with the black boots I CANNOT™

J I H Y O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BIAS WHO KILLS ME EVERY DAMN TIME that black dress with her shoulders out and all that jewelry THAT HIT DIFFERENT its my favorite fit of the whole mv that white two piece outfit im Died™ the one dance outfit that was mostly sheer?????? the ponytail??????? THE PURPLE TWO PIECE WITH THE PANTS AND THE BLACK SHORTER DRESS WITH THE PURPLE YES MAAM and she still has short hair im crying we already know how i feel about short hair

MINA 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i was shocked to see her like forreal it was still incredible she participated for the music video knowing her situation i havent seen any live performances but i recall that she doesnt perform with them THE ELEGANT SPARKLY DRESS LOOKING LIKE A WHOLE ENTIRE PRINCESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the white dress for the dance scenes with the one sleeve and the sparkly pink and white one and the pink (salmon colored????? pink-) dress IM APPRECIATE YOU

dahyun L I S T E N she used to be my bias too so this video just like jeongyeon SHE CAME AFTER MY NECK her kinda blue hair the white dance outfit with her shoulders out and the short dress with big long sleeves and the BLUE JACKET WHILE SHES IN THE RAIN WITH THE BLUE EYESHADOW PLS

chaeyoung................................ i was Attacked™ i dunno why i never considered her for a bias i considered her as one of my favorites (as if thats two different categories???? anyway-) that holographic fit with the long high ponytail yes the white two piece with the pants and gloves (i think she has bangs in this look???? if my eyes arent deceiving me) YES the shimmery one with the long see-through dress Y E S the pink (i dunno the color but ill just say pink-) dress Y E S and the light blue two piece YEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tzuyu literally the scenes with her in the little house is by far one of the most stunning looks i saw in the mv i- the crown on her head with the flowers and she has like blue hair and that BIG ASS dress covered in flowers and its so colorful and she looks freakin AMAZING the pink two piece with matching colored sneakers the white dress the LONG BLACK DRESS that was seen for like two (2) seconds and then that one fit that was a mix of blue and purple??????? i dunno but IT HIT why are you attacking me-

i literally just named all of their looks but they looked great in EVERY SINGLE ONE I JUST HAD TO MENTION THEM ALL

LIKE THIS SONG IS JUST SO GOOD ITS SO GOOD and the message the lyrics hold there are TEARS IN MY EYES the fact that the song is more on more on the upbeat side rather than making it sad is just............................... im love- ITS JUST SO TWICE™ YKNOW??????? even tho they changed their sound (i believe) it still feels like twice!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in recent time their songs havent disappointed me or made me go ‘eh’ on the first listen AT ALL thats just their Power™ and they are just SO incredible and amazing and I LOVE THIS SONG AND MV

IN CONCLUSION: LISTENING TO THIS HEALED MY SOUL AND MADE ME FEEL SPECIAL BETTER

[istheresomebodywhocanimagine]

Write It Down

strawberryfields-forever said: Ok so I absolutely LOVE your writing!! I was wondering if you could another roger Taylor Imagine where the reader gets really drunk and ends up at Rogers Place and he takes care of them and then she ends up confessing her feelings and you can take it from there? Please and thank you! Xxx

(a/n: i’m SO SORRY THIS IS SO LONG I CAN NEVER HELP MYSELF FUCK also this layout might be fucked when i first post it but i’ll try to fix it ASAP)

“Roger, it’s barely midnight, you’ve got to be fucking with me!” you complained, nearly tripping over yourself as he pulled you out of the pub and away from the guy who you’d just been chatting with. “Just one more pint!”

Roger ignored your incessant complaining as he got out onto the sidewalk, the pub door swinging shut behind you, and he began to look for a cab. Cursing at the lack of cars around, he quickly realized there was no way you were making it all the way back to your flat, not tonight. “My place, then,” he mumbled, letting go of your wrist to wrap his arm around your waist, starting to lead you towards his flat that was just over 7 blocks away.

“My flat is the other way!” you protested, almost being dead weight against his side as he used all of his strength to guide you down the street. “Where are we going, you silly goose?” you laughed, leaning even more on him and making him chuckle at how sloshed you were.

Despite your embarrassing situation, you were quite enjoying Roger’s arm around you. Of course, you were using all of your willpower left to keep your mouth shut, because even in your inebriated state, you knew this was not the time to clue Roger in on your little crush.

“Goose? Is that what you think of me?” he teased, helping you across the street and flipping off a car that honked at you both. “We’re going to my place, you can sleep there.”

“OoooOooOh,” you drew out, wiggling your eyebrows. “I get to go to the goose’s nest tonight!”

“My God,” he laughed, trying not to drop you as he continued to lead the way down the sidewalk, your arm wrapping loosely around his shoulder.

As he walked the 7 long blocks with you, you blabbered on and on about the guy at the bar. He had to hear about how he was an old friend from primary, and how he’d bought you drinks and asked if you’d been to a late night chips place down the road. You said you told him you hadn’t, so he offered to take you but you didn’t want to leave, and that’s about the time the “big boss Roger” showed up to end the fun.

As you walked up to the tower block Roger was living in with Brian and Freddie, you sighed dramatically and leaned your head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry I tried to make you stay longer,” you mumbled, slurring your words quite a bit, but Roger already knew how to decipher your drunken ramblings. You loved that about him. In fact, there were quite a few more things you loved about him that you hadn’t told him before. It was a pity you’d become such close friends, because you reckoned that was the only thing preventing you from telling Roger how you felt about him.

He chuckled and shook his head as you both approached the stairs, Roger wondering to himself how he’d get you up to the 4th floor. “Hey, let’s crawl up the stairs, that’d be fun, right?” he suggested, hoping you’d take to the idea. You groaned before starting to crawl up them, knowing the alternative was being carried and that would kill Roger before you got to the 2nd floor.

Roger followed, snickering a bit at the state of you, but encouraged you all the way to his floor, where you decided to lay down. “Rog, I’m beat,” you complained, pressing a hand against your head and closing your eyes. “I think I’m going to sleep here.”

“No, no, Y/N, don’t be a drama queen, that’s Fred’s job,” he ordered, grabbing ahold of your hand and pulling you up to what could be considered a standing position. Throwing your arm over his shoulder, he managed to drag you down to his flat as you apologized for trying to sleep. He then unlocked the door kicked it open gently, calling out for his roommates.

You decided to join in. “Freddieeeee,” you sang, your eyes still halfway closed and heavily lidded as you laughed at how terrible you sounded. “Briaaaann, come out, come out, wherever you are!”

Roger carefully sat you down on the sofa, patting your head gently before heading off to their rooms to find them empty. They must have decided to stay longer at the pub than they had originally planned, which made Roger groan softly. He was alone in getting your drunk ass to bed.

“Looks like it’s just you and me,” he said as he came back into the front room, where you’d managed to pull off your shoes and sprawl out on the couch. Your heart fluttered as you realized you were truly alone with Roger, and anything could happen. Jesus, I must be really drunk if I’m thinking we’re going to do anything but go to sleep tonight, you thought. “Let’s get a glass of water in you, eh?”

You nodded once, smiling lopsidedly up at him before closing your eyes and humming to yourself. As Roger grabbed a glass of water and some Tylenol for you, he heard you start to quietly sing off-key, then suddenly, you stopped. After a pause, you called out to him. “Rog, come sing your harmony, you bastard!”

You then began to sing Doing All Right unbearably loud, Roger trying to shush you and try not to laugh as he reminded you of the upstairs neighbor who hated how loud they were. As if on cue, the upstairs neighbor stomped on the floor, which made you shut up and look at Roger with an impish grin. He looked adorable tonight, and you hated yourself for noting that. He was supposed to be your best friend and confidant, and now here you were wondering why you hadn’t made out with him already.

As you admired him, he couldn’t help but grin back at you. Shaking his head, he helped you sit up, handing you the water and Tylenol before sitting next to you and pulling his shoes off. You gratefully took the pills and water, then sat the glass on the nightstand next to you before laying down again, sprawling over Roger’s lap and making him raise an eyebrow at you. “I’m sorry for being loud,” you practically whispered, running a hand over your face before giving him a guilty look. “I promise I’ll be good now.”

“You’re awfully apologetic tonight,” he remarked, relaxing back against the couch and spreading one arm out along the back while the other hand rested on your stomach lightly. “How come you never want to apologize to me when you’re not a shitfaced mess?!”

“Oh, fuck off and die,” you automatically replied, reaching out to smack his chest playfully. As soon as you did it, your jaw dropped and you began apologizing profusely, becoming a babbling mess again.

He began to shush you again, laughing in between shushes and finally resorting to putting a hand over your mouth. Quieting again, Roger gave it a moment before moving his hand to play with a strand of your hair instead. “I think it’s time you went to bed, sweetheart.”

“No, I’m finnne!” you swore, though your drooping eyelids told him otherwise. He gave you a look, which made you whine and roll off his lap, crawling to the floor and starting to make your way towards his bedroom. “You’re such a bully,” you whined as you slowly crawled your way down the hallway, Roger following close behind and rolling his eyes.

“Do you want to sleep on the floor tonight?” he warned, which made you crawl faster and scramble into his bed when you got to his room. “That’s what I thought.”

“I’m sorry, Rog, I didn’t mean it,” you whined, crawling under his covers and peeking out at him as he started to get ready for bed. “Thank you for taking care of me tonight,” you added, wanting to get back on his good side. “I really ‘preciate it, honestly. You’re the best.”

“That’s my job,” he reassured, pulling off his shirt and tossing it in his dirty laundry as you watched him. You admired his remarkably slender build that contradicted somewhat with his status as a drummer. He didn’t have any remarkably prominent muscles on him, but he was still toned, and though his hair was longer, he didn’t seem too feminine to you in the dim light that was coming through his blinds from the city lights outside. Though, would it matter if he did look feminine? You found yourself thinking that Roger was attractive to you in any state, drunk or sober, angry or happy, mean or nice, any way, any day.

“You’re my faaavorite, Roggie,” you said affectionately, overwhelmed with admiration for him all of a sudden.

Roger laughed at that, glancing back at you before going over to his closet. “I’d bloody hope so.”

“You don’t have to take care of me, like this, you know?” you mumbled, still watching him as he searched for some pajama pants in his piles of clothes. “I know I can be a bit much, and you’re soooo fucking wonderful for putting up with me,” you continued on, Roger smirking at that. He found a pair of pajama pants, which he started switching into, so you looked at the ceiling out of courtesy and started to close your eyes. “I mean it, Rog. You’re the best, you treat me wayyyyy too well. There’s nothing keeping you here-”

“Well, it’s my flat,” he interjected, making you open your eyes again and shoot him a dirty look. “I’m sorry, go on about how I’m the best,” he laughed, starting to crawl into bed with you and making you scoot over as he laid on his side next to you, watching you expectantly with his head propped up on one hand. You were suddenly nervous, Roger no closer than he’d ever been to you before. You’d slept in the same bed before, but you’d never felt so much love for him all at once while in such close proximity. Unable to filter yourself, you continued.

“I meant, like, I’m just me and that’s alright, I guess, but there’s no reason for you to stick around and take all my bullshit like you do. Like, you’re not my boyfriend or anything,” you rambled, both you and Roger not sure where you were going with this. The alcohol still coursing through your body propelled you, however, and you kept talking. “But I’on’t know, I always thought you’d end up my boyfriend, as much as you put up with me, but I’ve pretty much just given up that idea. You keep sticking around anyways, honestly kind of scamming yourself, you are,” you admitted, avoiding eye contact with Roger and instead looking at his collarbones as you played with the duvet nervously. You knew you’d started to say too much, but your stupid feelings wouldn’t stop coming out because you were so nervous and Roger being right there made you even more nervous.

“You thought we’d end up dating?” Roger asked, no hint of emotion in his voice to suggest he leaned either way on the issue. He was asking more for a clarification, which made you even more shaky as you tried to compose a response that wasn’t horridly revealing. However, that worked out about as well as it could, considering the amount of alcohol you’d consumed before leaving the bar.

“I guess, yeah,” you mumbled, still afraid to look up at him. “Fred’s always teasing me about when you’re going to ask me out, so I guess after a certain point… I didn’t mind the idea of it anymore?” The last part of the sentence came out as more of a question, and you squeezed your eyes shut, mentally smacking yourself for sounding so terrified. Fuck it. I’m already this far gone, why not just let it all out? “No,no, no, not I guess. I know I don’t mind the idea anymore. Actually, I’m a bit bummed you still haven’t asked me out. What’s with that?”

“Very subtle, Y/N,” Roger teased, reaching up to replace a stray hair that had fallen into your face. “Fred’s been bothering you about me, has he? I’ll have to tell him off tomorrow.”

“Oh, please don’t!” you begged, quickly looking up at him with a desperate look in your eyes. “He’ll know that I told you that I fancy you and then I’ll never hear the end of it!”

“Well, now there’s news,” Roger commented, a blush creeping on to your cheeks as you realized how stupidly you’d just told him how you felt about him. Shit, you’ve done it now, Y/N. “You never said you fancy me, love, not until just now. What’s with that?”

“Oh, forget it,” you groaned hopelessly, rolling over to face away from him and pulling the covers over your head. The room felt like it was spinning as you laid there in the dark, and you took a few deep breaths to calm down. “Forget I even said that, I’m sloshed and don’t know what I’m doing.”

Roger began to laugh, tugging the covers back down and booing you. “Oh, boo you, I was just taking the piss. Look at me, I’m sorry! I won’t do it again.” You reluctantly rolled back over, giving him the stink eye as you kept the covers pulled up to your shoulders, trying to hide as much vulnerability as possible. “Now, back to the asking you out thing, when did Fred start to bother you about this?”

You wracked your brain, struggling to pull memories through the muddle of alcohol and embarrassment, but you finally recalled at least an approximate date and managed to choke it out. “A couple months ago, maybe?”

“Damn! He was supposed to keep his mouth shut,” Roger cursed, mainly to himself. “Also, you’ve been taking this from him for two whole months?”

“Yeah,” you admitted reluctantly, sounding ashamed. Then, your brain latched on to what he said before, and starting racing as you tried to figure out what he’d meant. “Freddie was supposed to keep his mouth shut about what?” you pried, suddenly propping your head up on one hand too.

Roger chuckled, then shook his head and laid down on his back, his eyes lazily tracing around the ceiling as he answered nonchalantly. “Well, if you must know, I told him I’d been thinking about asking you out a couple months ago, when we were recording one night. But I’d honestly been having so much fun and going out with you anyways these last few months, I didn’t even think about it anymore. I thought he’d zipped it, but that worked about as well as I should have expected… Lead singers, they have such big mouths.”

Your face broke out into a wide grin as you processed what he was saying. “God, I better be sober enough now to remember this in the morning,” you murmured, rubbing your eyes to stop the room from spinning and hardly believing what had just went down.

“I’ll convince you it was a dream,” Roger taunted, looking over at you only to receive more stink eye from you.

“I’m going to write it down right now so I don’t forget,” you stated, climbing over him and out of the bed in a determined fashion, Roger trying to grab you to keep you from leaving but failing. You clumsily made your way over to his desk and grabbed a pencil and his journal that he wrote songs in, flipping through the pages to find an empty one while Roger untangled himself from the duvet that you’d gotten him wrapped up in.

“Hey, don’t read that!” he exclaimed, nearly falling off the bed as he tried to scramble over to you, so you ran out of the room, nearly slipping in the hallway as you made your way to the bathroom and locked yourself in. Roger got there two seconds too late, banging on the door as you leaned against the other side, knowing the lock wouldn’t hold long if he had a key. “Are you mad, Y/N? Give me my song book!”

You ignored him, figuring he genuinely didn’t want you to remember what he’d confessed, and kept going through the pages. On your quest to find an empty one, something caught your eye as you flipped through quickly, and you stopped. Going back, you realized that it was your name that had gotten your attention, and you got back to the page to find a song titled after you.

Curiosity got the best of you and you started reading his scribblings as best as you could. You realized it was a love song, and your heart soared as you smiled wider than you figured you ever had. Roger liked you as much as you fancied him, and now you had proof.

You heard Roger start to unlock the door with a key so you unlocked it anyways, swinging it open to find a disheveled Roger. His hair was unkempt, the duvet still caught around his foot, and he was looking at you wildly as he tried to rationalize what to do next. You were just smiling at him, his song book still open to the page you were just reading, and you held it up to show him. 

Visibly deflating, he snatched the song book from you and put a hand on your upper back, pushing you firmly but gently in the direction of his room like you were a small child in trouble for getting out of bed past bedtime.

“I didn’t write that,” he lied lamely, just making you giggle and laugh as you entered his room, crawling back into his bed. “It was… Brian. Yeah, Brian borrowed my journal and wrote that about you! Right weirdo, he is. I don’t write that mushy crud like him and Deacy.”

He leaned on his desk with one hand to reach down and unwrap the duvet from his ankle, and when he looked back up at you, you were still grinning and giggling at him. He sighed, mainly at himself, and came back over to the bed, tossing the duvet over you before reluctantly crawling back into bed with you and laying on his back, staring at the ceiling.

“Whatever you say, Rog,” you finally replied, Roger groaning softly as he refused to recognize he was on the embarrassing side of things now. However, when you curled up against his side and draped your arm loosely over his stomach, he didn’t push you away. 

In fact, as you drifted off peacefully, he even smiled a bit and wrapped an arm around you protectively, drifting off himself as he realized that, no matter how embarrassing, he’d finally gotten what he’d wanted after all this time – you.

[rk-869]

Ac!au. assassination failed

(Im using the name nines because I like it the most) (Also im not the best at writing and ignore typos or grammar errors, English isn’t my first language) Nines was the most skilled assassin in the brotherhood. He was very well known and always accomplished his mission. He got it done quickly and most of the people who hired him were happy about this. But boy did he knew his life was going to change after this mission.

“So you take the task, mr. Nines?” A rich man looks up at the assassin who was hiding half in the shadow. He was sitting on the desk well the only thing could be seen from underneath his hood was two ice blue eyes looking curious at the man. The man slightly shivers, this assassin was pretty intimidating and he could feel it. “I will indeed, this man Connor anderson will be eliminated as soon as possible” Nines replies. He stood up and nodded at the man “I’ll see ay you after you bring me evidence you actually killed him. Only to be sure though.” Nines rolls his eyes because of this. As if he wasn’t trustworthy enough. He didn’t complain about it and just tapped his hood before sliding out of the window back into the darkness.

As nines had climbed onto a building and watched over his hometown , he started wondering how long it would take to get his target down. He did a bit of digging into Connors history and this man wasn’t an easy one. He was rich young and well skilled so he should be careful with him. Nines decides to hold an eye on him so he could study the best moment he could possibly attack this person and bring him down without others to notice. He nods to himself as he was sure that’d be the best option to do. The assassin sighs and stared down the town being amused by the light and beauty of it. Sometimes he wished he wasn’t alone so he could share the love for his town with someone else, but assassins were born to be alone. Nines smiles sadly at this thought shaking his head before sliding down to the ground again, going home so he could start fresh tomorrow.

The next day Nines was as early as the sun and was already wondering around the crowd in the city. He found out where Connor mostly hangs out and started heading towards it staying as much out of sight as he could. He saw his target sitting down on a table holding a drink or something well talking to his dad, Hank anderson. Nines sat down on a bench not far away from them and listened to their conversation. “Oh cmon dad it would be fun! You haven’t had fun in weeks this party will definitely loosen you up a bit” Connor said chuckling well looking at the older man “Connor please im too old for parties. Im already having fun enough well sitting on a couch with some beer well petting sumo, I don’t need stuff like that in my life anymore. But if you wanna go, go ahead you’re old enough to choose for yourself” hank nodded at Connor making him sigh “You’ll be missing alot, but fine stay at home. I’ll make sure I make some food for you before i go” He holds up his glass at hank before throwing it back into his mouth. Nines couldn’t help but smile a bit. A typical son-dad relationship. Would almost be a shame to break it if Connor wasn’t seen as a threat. Besides that, a party? That’d be the best time to let him get into a room and shut him down. Nines needed more information about this party. He looks carefully up at the two people interacting seeing hank smiling st Connor before ruffling through his brown hair “you’re such a good kid son” Connor just smiled brightly before they left. Nines heart pounded a bit. He didn’t understand why though but seeing his target smile was so pure. He shook his head trying to get this thought out of his mind knowing that he needed to assassin this man and shouldn’t be thinking like this. The assassin stood up and followed the two men from a safe distance.

After a half day of following Connor around Nines came to know that the party was tomorrow night so he had enough time to get ready for it. Nines had decided to go undercover and make sure he could get Connor to follow him into a room. The next day flee by as he had prepared everything. The assassin was unrecognizable, being in a classy suit and all dressed up for the party. It was a fancy party for rich people and everyone could walk in, if you had money of course. Nines heads to the party and was capable of fooling the guards to let him in. He looks around the place trying to find his target and locked his vision on Connor as he was standing talking to some people. Connor looked comfy instead of fancy, his clothes being a bit loose and his hair being a messy but on a let say cute way. Nines couldn’t help but stare a bit at him looking at every single detail of his body before actually approaching him. As he got closer nines saw Connor was smaller than him what was amusing to him for some reason. When the assassin got closer Connor looks up towards him meeting looking into his cold eyes with two brown warm orbs. They looked welcoming and friendly. Nines once again felt his heart skip a beat but ignored it. He wasn’t here for this bullshit he was here to accomplish his task. Connor gave him a smile “well hello, im sure we haven’t met yet.” Connor held out his hands and nines took it “im Connor anderson, one of the hosts here” Nines nodded and lightly smiled back “im Nines, its a pleasure to meet you mr. Anderson” Connor softly chuckles taking his hand back “oh just call me Connor im not much of a mister person” Nines nods at him. They picked up a conversation as Connor started telling him what he experienced through traveling and sailing but that he was always happy to be back in his hometown that he loved. Nines started to feel more appreciation towards this man for some reason. How he talks about this town and how passionate it was. Connor was interesting for nines honestly and for some reason he made nines feel weird watching his brown eyes sparkle from excitement well speaking. Nines bit his lip a bit. For once in his life he felt that a task for him was going to be hard. He never had this before mostly he could just slit a mans throat easily after interacting with them. But this man felt different. Nines didn’t know why but he just did. The assassin cursed in himself before making the conclusion he just needed to do this. He never failed a mission anyways

“Um Connor? Could I talk to you in private?” The young man looks surprised by his request but nodded “of course! Follow me theres a empty room around here” he smiles and starts heading towards it. Nines followed with his hands on his back calmly. As they got into the room Nines got close to Connor immediately. The smaller man got confused by this and wanted to say something but kept it shut as a faint red crosses his face. Nines didn’t understand it but did understand what he needed to do. He grabbed Connor and held him close, their faces almost a inch away from each other. Nines heart pounded fast being so close to Connor but neither of them said something. Both males had a blush crossed their face now looking into each other’s eyes. But a look of fear went into Connors eyes as nines pressed a knife against his neck. Nines wanted to do it, he wanted to accomplish his mission but he couldn’t. In such short time this young person had a affect on him that he couldn’t describe at all. He bit his lip seeing the fear in Connors eyes before dropping the knife and closed the gap between them kissing the other roughly. Connor was caught off guard by this but after a minute or so he kissed back. They parted as nines pants slightly from all the tension that got into him before releasing the flustered man he was holding. Nines huffed looking down at him “this isn’t over yet.” He softly says before opening the window and disappears into the shadows. Connor had watched him leave rather flustered and amused. Who was he?

[cliffffhangerr i guesss]

>Yo, this was so cute! I need you write more! Are you going to write more? I hope so. Love at first sight, eh? I’m digging it fam, I am :)

[survivormetaverse]

Episode 4 - "Now the fun part begins" ~Colin

All I gotta say....finesse

Look at us go✨ I say us because if I say me that sounds conceited even tho it was literally a hero challenge 😂. [HI THIS WAS BURIED IN MY TABS IT'S FROM ROUND 3 I WAS PROBS GONNA WRITE MORE BUT OH WELL]

We tribe swapped and I was really stressed at first because now im on the tribe that loses all of the challenges. But its fine bcs im friends with everyone now and im in an alliance with Ginny and Amy. I also love Danny he is literally under the influence rn im exposing him. But hopefully when hws sober he remembers how cool i am and we will work together. And Jennifer is on my tribe and we're friendly with each other. But honestly it would be in my best game interests to have her the one voted out. If it comes to that. Bcs Im literally working with everyone and shes pretty inactive.

Welp. Here we are. Swapped. It's a lil fucked up but I saw it coming. So I got stuck with Brayden which is like whatever to me, I'm glad him and I talked enough on original phantoms. But the issue is that it's just him and myself. Along with that its the two S.E.E.S. and one Fool. So I immediately swooped in on Jared, I tried to be relatable with him by talking about Danny and Shaad, who I know, and I think gthat brought him comfort. I spilled to Jared that Danny and Shaad know each other to show him that I have info and I'm willing to be open about stuff and talk with him straight up. We got to talking, and we declared that we want to work together WHICH IS GREAT!! Idk how much I can trust him, but if I show him loyalty and openness I think I'd get it back from him which is clutch. I need him to be the third with Brayden and myself, but I'm sure Jay and Elle are thinking the exact same thing. That's why I swooped in so fast, and I'm sure he'll tell them what they want to hear and theres a chance hes doing that to me as well (and I don't blame him, make your own decisions Jared king), but I need to show him that sticking with me is the better option. Idk idk I'm just trying to avoid playing my idol rn. I'll keep working on Jared, and I'll see what Brayden's been up to. ALSOOO APPARENTLY so Brayden tells me that him and Elle played together (which I knew), but he voted them out so idk how their dynamic is. Lots to think about, I guess now I actually do want to win immunity because I don't feel as secure as I did on original phantoms. But I def have Brayden on my side, and I'm really hoping Jared is truly gonna ride with me. Idols/advantages are also a potential problem here because what if Elle or Jay have one. I hope Brayden is just lying to me and he secretly has something too. I almost told him about mine but I decided against it. Much to think about, much to do, much to win.

I got an idolllll✨ lol so glad i signed up because no one else from my tribe did so it was super easy 😄 Tribe swap!! Sad bc i'll miss Colin 😔 real homie right there um i mean sure others too maybe lol I switched with Jay so no worries there and Anastasia I'm sorry to say we've never really clicked like we've worked together before (and she's backstabbed me before) but we've never really been like *this* y'know??? And Babs and Jennifer I barely talked to Babs likes musical theater and vine references tho so she's cool B) Anywayssss Dennis knows the pain of being a Starbucks barista and I was with Jared in the shape memory and felt bad for them oof so yeah OH! and Brayden helped vote me out in Kyoshi after saying he wouldn't vote for me... Dont Love That but also it was kinda a hopeless situation in Kyoshi kinda tragicccc for me funnily enough I was tribe swap screwed over but that's not like this time (if it is I will SCREAM but also I'm chill with whatever place I get in this game so eh) yeah i kinda made myself stop drinking caffeine/copious amounts of sugar for a year and then started back at Starbucks and immediately broke soooo I have no idea how coherent this is I think we'll do well in the challenge!! It's scavenger hunt but also I am working this weekend :( hate that for me ik me too boo so we'll see how much I can do I remember being upset at myself in prev. seasons because I went too hard in challenges and I feel like in this one I just don't have the time to 😂 the way to get priorities is to get a life apparently lol kidding but also am I??? Idk kinda forgot what I was talking about. Yay in the Phantom tribe now and we will crush this challenge✨

This tribe is getting on my nerves. 2 of them are super nice and I'd love to work with them but I don't know how the pre-alliances worked before this tribe. I really enjoy Amy and Anastasia but trying to talk to Ginnifer is like pulling teeth and Jennifer still hasn't said....anything.

https://youtu.be/maj4CRLrsjQ sorry this is really long i didnt mean to

My tribe is going to council.

At first, I thought I was SCREWED because I got neither Amy, Dennis, or Brayden from my OG tribe for the swap. I barely spoke to Josh, but at least he tries in challenges and we have that going for us. I absolutely adore Colin, he's experienced and he doesn't hide it, but here's a good support system and I see why he goes far in these games. By virtue of me being active, I can hopefully stay alive from this swap. As for the challenge, it's incredibly difficult to do since only the 3 of us are actively doing it, and with 3 slots, it means everyone has to do everything, which is virtually impossible. Shaad complained about his old tribe but a lot of his tribemates' confessionals about him were about him being inactive, and I'm definitely seeing it. Babs hasn't even accepted my message request yet. I absolutely trust Colin and I'm debatable with Josh, but I sure hope that he's not working with Shaad and Babs. But I'm 99% sure that's not the case because even Colin hasn't talked to Babs much and they haven't even been accepting message requests. I absolutely think we're headed to tribal, but honestly, that might be fine because it'll save my other allies in the other tribes. I just hate going to tribal council because it's never fun and it makes me nervous. Every time. But hopefully my social relationships I've made will get me through this swap even if I have to (at last, I guess) go to tribal council. 

~

https://youtu.be/FJOPBi8cnBk

The swap is fun so far doing a fun and hilarious scavenger hunt but yuck my face is sticky blech 

Okay I think I figured out a lot. I think all the idols are on my tribe. The way Jared and Jay talk to me shows me that theyre smart players and I realllllly think they both have idols. And the three of us are just dancing around that subject. So if we go to tribal, I have to move very cautiously and thats why im trying to get another advantage. I think Jay is going for it too, homeboy messages me in 10 minute intervals. I think I can only afford going to tribal once with this tribe, I'm just hoping we win out especially if all the idols are chilling here I don't want to play it yet. Ima just keep hunting i dont have a lot of thoughts rn.

I'm not sure where I'm at. I feel decent about elle, she has familiarity with me, it should be convenient for her and I to stay together. I do like Jared too...the hope is that he links up with us and we can take out Brayden. Nothing personal against Brayden, but I like Dennis more, and I feel like I can work with Dennis in a merge scenario. If we can get Brayden out whenever we go to tribal, I'll also be put in a scenario at that point where I can either go with Jared and Elle, or maybe Jared and Dennis. Dennis seems very low key and more social than strategic, so he's a good person to play with for a decent amount of time. 

Uh idr my last confessional or when it was :( we just did the scavenger hunt challenge and are waiting for results and i really hope we don't have to go to tribal bc what a crappy birthday present that'd be!! Bc my birthday is tomorrow :)))))) I hope people remember bc I'm not going to say anything 😶 just to see who remembereddddd probs no one and ill break midday or maybe I'll leave it alone who knows! I'm going on a picnic tomorrow tho and then probs celebrating with fam so it'd be a bad day for a tribal :( OMG what if I got voted out on My Birthday that'd be so r00d but like kinda iconic too very memorable 21st brithday the one where I was voted out Metaverse... anyways uh hope we win this challenge lol 😅

Okay so it's cute and all that we won but Miss Jennifer needs to go ASAP. I low-key wanted to go to tribal just so I could let her GO, but it's whatever. I get a day to chill finally. I don't have to think as hard anymore. I feel good.

~

I think the thing I am very interested in seeing is what's about to happen with Shaad in that tribe.

~

But also, I really love Amy. I think she's really gonna be good for me.

okay i've been slacking on confessionals so im gonna pretend this is like 2 days ago and make one solely about the swap AHHH TRIBE SWAP i'm kinda excited that none of my alliance members are on my new tribe. that seems opposite but its gonna give me a better chance to branch out and make new connections, then when merge hits rekindle the old alliance that existed pre swap. hopefully that all pans out!! immediately I started vibing with Jodi. she's an absolute QUEEN and we match each other's energies perfectly. we've been shading others in the tribe, joking around, connecting personally, it's been great!! honestly i knew within like the first 20 mins I wanted to duo with her and be a f2. the rest of the tribe however? sheeeeesh babs and shaad are very inactive. apparently shaad blew up on his last tribe bc they almost voted him out... for being inactive? like sir if the shoe fits. pls fix it. babs is going THRU it and I feel for them. but... just say somethin josh is kind of a king. jodi likes him. he's putting in a lot of effort and I appreciate that. not sure if it makes him a threat but it definitely makes him an asset SO I approached both of them with an alliance!! and it worked!! i now have ANOTHER alliance woo!! with josh and jodi!! woo!! here's part of my host chat rambling bc I confess way more there than I do here i think Jodi and Josh might be like a duo tho the way Jodi talks about is kinda sus imma need to weasel my way in maybe I'll suggest a trio alliance as the most 'active' people on the tribe as a means to get close to them, then I'll use that to secure a f2 with jodi jodi radiates the same type of chaotic energy I do in games but she gets more bored than I do which is not good but more fun

~

we LOST but im not SURPRISED i feel like we shouldve won SOLELY bc I got SANDRA DIAZ-TWINE to send me a selfie. that's fucking iconic. one of my proudest org career moments. anyway now the fun part begins. gotta decide who goes. it's either shaad or babs. I think the easiest and most common sense thing to do is vote babs because they've been more inactive. but also its the first live tribal and I think shaad will give drama if we vote him off. and that makes GOOD FUCKING TV. so idk. options options. we'll see!

holy shit phantoms won immunity. phantoms stays the winning tribe 4 times in a row holy shit. i actually wanted to win this time and put a lot of effort into this because no ma'am i need safety rn and work on these relationships. just need time. speaking of time, im about to hit hour 12 of the endurance hunt and im starting to feel like a madman. but babyyyyy i want another advantage and hopefully another fucking idol holy shit can you imagine???? i still haven't told anyone and my lips are gonna remain sealed. however i still think that yall are messy and set up my tribe where u knew brayden and i werent super close and from what ive gathered jay and elle weren't close either. so u put the two pairs that arent close with the one fool. okay so what else could we possibly have in common on this tribe to add more mess? IDOLS!!!!! like the three people that got the idols got swapped onto the same tribe like that has to be it. so jared would have to have one, even though he told me he didnt but the way he talked to me about idols in general literally makes me feel like he has one. i was like it would be so nice to have a little bit of security and hes like yeah i know what you mean. like bro just tell me u got a fuckin idol already. so then jay or elle have to have one. and i am convinced jay has one. maybe elle is gonna gag me with her idol but im gonna assume its jay. jared has spoken with him, and i have spoken with him. the three of us feel really good with each other (but im pretty sure jared has me above him bc i got to him first). we'll probs make an alliance chat shortly. i recognize that jared and jay are good at the strategic part of the game and are really smart and just good overall competitors and ESPECIALLY if they have idols that makes them even more dangerous. so i have to work with them than against them i have to make sure that they know i have them above everyone else. i think three strong players naturally gravitated towards eachother and if we really all do have idols its so funny that we're not telling each other. but im slowly but surely working on getting it out of them but if theyre as smart as i think they are they wont tell me. im just gonna continue being "transparent" with them and we'll see where it goes i hope they dont catch on. also jays a fucking liar because we were on a call today and i asked him if he did any hunts. he gave me a pause and then slurred his speech when he said "i haven't done any" like broooooooo ur fuckin lying to me right through your teeth. im convinced hes doing this one because he was up early for some breakfast and his lil skype thing showed online status allllll day like i gotta assume hes doing it. even if he didnt do the first three like hes def doing the last three dont play dumb with me!!!! i am not the one baby. but actually as im writing this hes not online anymore so if he really was doing it maybe he stopped? so if he was up early i would assume he started at 7 or 8 and ending by 9:30 he did 13 or 14 hours? idk im literally going till i cant stay up anymore ive already hit the 12 hours mark now if i went this long i have to go for the w likeee i have to. thats all i got for ya right now dont ever ask me for anything again.

no joke my brain is melting pls help

~

i want a survivor wiki page :(

During challenge: https://youtu.be/IsGPtYtgnQ4 After challenge results: https://youtu.be/CgmLGWBvEhw

https://youtu.be/Yfsh_odV-Zg

The tribe swap really confused me. I was finally getting the hang of this game but now I'm doubting myself again. I also haven't been active much for the past 2 days and I think my tribe mates have noticed. I need to stay on top of things better if I don't want to (eventually) get voted out.

That this tribe swap screwed me over. It left me with Babs whos been completely inactive and Shaad whos been completely useless. At least I gained an alliance with Jodi and Colin but this is fucking pitiful.

https://youtu.be/pE207b8VRFE

can't wait to vote out jared and jay once jury starts

So I had planned on doing hourly milestone activities like calling a friend at 15 hours, eating ice cream at 16 hours etc and I was filming it to vlog the evening for my confessionals.. but my mom called me around 10:55 for a family emergency and when it was done it was 11:01 and my alarm got overridden by the call. That’s how I dropped and I’m really sad 😔 i low key don’t wanna play the game today but I literally have tribal so I have to stay online, even tho I’d still be more active than babs and shaad ☠️ I wanted this one so bad because the only thing I’m good at is not sleeping. Whoever went longer than 15.5 hours is now at the top of my hitlist, if I find out you also tried this hard for an advantage, I will take u out w my army. Even if it’s a superidol. The only good thing from this L is it ignited a huge motivator for me to play this game hard again (but not too hard) but have a goal and mission to complete. 

~

https://youtu.be/PR8XWvdH-Hc

~

update: i think Amy has it. I'll ask her about it at the merge, she won the 24 hour comp in her last org so it's very possible she gunned this advantage out. if she tells me she has it, then i know I'm absolutely her #1, if not, then we'll see what happens ..... 

~~~

Edgic:

Power Rankings:

Phantom

Jared: He has done well to place himself firmly in the middle of his tribe. The two sides are definitely going by tribal lines at the moment which makes him the most powerful person on the tribe. Everyone wants to work with him. He will definitely be safe if his tribe has to go to tribal council soon.

Jay: This comes as a surprise, but Jay has bonded well with Jared. So much so that Jared listed Jay as the person he trusts the most currently on his tribe. This gives the S.E.E.S. side a bit more longevity on this tribe which is definitely in Jay’s interest. I can see Jared and Jay forming a tight duo.

Dennis: He is definitely in a better spot than he was on his last tribe. No one on this tribe has explicitly said they distrust or want to target Dennis. He’s playing it safe which is good. He lands himself higher than Elle because Jared seems to trust him more. If the decision was between Dennis and Elle, he would be the one safe. Additionally, he’s also sniffed out that the idols are all on this tribe (which is just a coincidence). However, he believes that Jay has it rather than Elle which is an unfortunate guess from him. However, what is excellent game sense is that he wants to form an alliance with Jay and Jared which could definitely benefit him in the long run when he needs to separate himself from his Phantoms.

Elle: It is sad to see Elle near the bottom, but it doesn’t seem like they have won anyone over with their charm on this tribe. Everyone besides Jay sees Elle as someone expendable if this tribe were to go to two consecutive tribal councils. On the plus side, Elle has an idol. If it comes to that, she may be able to keep herself safe.

Brayden: For some reason, no one except Dennis trusts Brayden. In fact, I would not be surprised if Jared, Jay, and Elle came to the consensus that he should be the one to go out of the two Phantoms. Brayden’s unwillingness to work with Dennis rears its ugly head as, even now, Brayden wants to distance himself from Dennis. He seems to believe that he is good with Jay and Jared when both parties have listed him on the bottom of their trust rankings. If Brayden is not careful, he is going to find himself blindsided and voted out premerge in this game.

Fools

Danny: Amy and Anastasia want to keep Danny in spite of their alliance with Ginny. It feels as if both of them want to work closely with him AND want to ditch that alliance. Danny easily has the most control as he has key allies that are willing to go to bat for him if things get messy. I even believe that he would be saved rather than Ginny if this tribe were to go to tribal council consecutively.

Anastasia: Her prior connection with Ginny has instantly landed her in an alliance with Amy despite the fact she doesn’t even know Amy like that. In fact, Anastasia doesn’t even trust Amy that much, but is still willing to work with her and pretend to be allies. Additionally, she has gotten into the good graces of Danny for whom she is trying to work closely with. Anastasia is the most connected with Danny which means she is the safest out of the group. However, Amy sees right through the veneer which means that Anastasia could be labelled as a big threat and be subsequently taken out at the early stages of merge. It was definitely a mistake to inform Amy about their prior connection with Elle.

Amy: What lands Amy here is that Anastasia doesn’t trust her. I was surprised too, but, looking at it, Anastasia would cut Amy over Ginnifer. What puts her above Ginnifer is her activity, however. Hopefully Amy can gain more trust with Danny and Anastasia and be safer in the future. Amy has a good read on Anastasia which keeps her in this position as well. She knows exactly what she needs to do to survive this tribe with the necessary numbers, but can she do it?

Ginnifer: I believe Ginnifer made a misstep by creating an alliance with Anastasia and Amy. At least for Amy, she doesn’t know how to feel considering Ginny never mentioned the alliance and just put them in it. It may have been a bit too presumptuous which leads to hesitation and distrust with the people she wants to ally with. Finally, Danny was also annoyed by Ginny being inactive near the start of the challenge which lowers her overall safety at tribal council

Jennifer: Where is Jennifer San Diego? Her inactivity and unhelpfulness in the challenge makes her the easiest target. There’s not much to say except if she doesn’t pick it up soon and socialize, she will be sitting in the VL.

S.E.E.S.

Jodi: Once again, Jodi has emerged as the tribe leader. Despite being on a plane for the whole day, she has been the most vocal about organizing the challenge. People are very attracted to Jodi’s energy making it easy for her to make allies in any situation she finds herself in. Right now, she has allied with Colin and Josh which easily puts her on the top of this trio alliance. Therefore, she is the safest person on the tribe. She has also been dictating this vote pretty heavily. I fear that Jodi just does not know how to chill though. Her biggest weakness is that she will jump out at anything and try to keep talking when she should just hold back. If she keeps playing the way she is, she will end up as an early jury boot.

Colin: Colin has attached himself to Jodi pretty heavily. I can definitely see this being Colin’s Final 2 rather than any of his allies back on S.E.E.S. The good part about it is that Jodi seems to feel the same way which is great. Additionally, Colin can hide behind Jodi’s massive target at merge.

Josh: Josh does very well in the challenges which keeps him in people’s good graces. His activity definitely helps him survive this tribe as well. He has found himself allied with Jodi out of necessity though. I do not doubt that Colin and Jodi will leave Josh in the dust once merge rolls around and they have their allies back. However, Josh is doing the thing he should be doing at pre-merge: being good at challenges and being active. Anything more would put an unnecessary target on his back at merge.

Babs: Babs is never online and did not even try to help in the challenge. This leaves them low. However, they do still have a Vote Blocker so they can pull some shenanigans if they so choose. Additionally, their inactivity may be used as a shield for now as, at the very least, Jodi is still willing to gtry and get to know Babs.

Shaad: I do not particularly understand why the trio alliance wants to target Shaad. He has a pre-established enemy in Jared and is willing to blow up if he wants to. He could make a great shield in the future, and he would not target these people. However, they believe that Shaad is more useless in the challenges than Babs (despite Babs never being online). And, without any allies on this tribe, there is no one there to vouch for Shaad making his demise seem clear. I hope somehow Shaad can pull himself out, but it does not seem likely.

[survivor-all-stars-blog]

EP 9: “I'll Be a Fucking Pawn For Y'all If It Saves My Ass" - Carson

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK WHEN WILL THINGS ACTUALLY GO MY WAY?  NEVER. :/  

This sucks so much, y'all are awesome for getting Kait to her SECOND win.

That could've been cleaner. Yikes.

This vote obviously put me in something of a weird position. I was never going to vote Kait because of our alliance. And yes, I firmly believe she'd side with me over the alleged Malay-cult. She and I have been closer than a lot of allies I've had in these games so far. We're in lockstep, we're keeping each other sane, and we're not even talking exclusively strategy. The best alliances are formed by people who like each other's outlooks and attitudes, right? That's me and Kait right now.

I was also never going to vote Jack or Lydia because of our awesome Thotse quad with Wes. And I was not likely to vote Steffen unless there was a critical mass going his way. That left us with Ruthie (immune,) Carson and Jakey (on Kabru with me.) So, shit.

Anyway, I told MJ I might try to protect Jake if I could because they both want to work together. But the momentum started swinging his way, and it became even more locked in when he started targeting Kait. His best play would've been to target Steffen or Carson, and even then I'm not sure he could've rallied the votes. 

Not wanting to be totally screwed on Kabru after a blindside, I didn't really engage with Jake too much. He came to me asking me to vote with him, almost as a last resort I feel? We hadn't talked since the swap, and he only came to me at 6:30, even though I know for a fact he was talking with others throughout the day. He told me he had Ruthie, Jack and Steffen locked in. I knew the latter two just weren't true. So rather than give him false hope, I checked with the latter two that their votes hadn't changed, then told Jake the votes weren't as locked in as he thought. 

And he, somewhat predictably, lost his shit. He didn't want to accept that, telling me that if I voted for him, he'd stay... that my vote was the difference maker... that I was too far up Kait's ass to see it... that I needed to grow a fucking backbone... that I'm pathetic.... that I'm terrible at the game...

Yeah, I've played enough games by now to know nothing good comes from engaging in someone who's resorting to personal shots. So I disengaged. And I think Jake may have forgotten there's a second game going on, in his blind rage? As a multiple-time pre-juror, I know for a fact that it's so not worth getting upset over. Shit happens, the game doesn't break your way. But attacking people over it accomplishes exactly nothing. From what I hear, it sounds like I got off easy too. Apparently he ripped hard into Carson, Kait, Lydia and Jack too.

I don't like when people are sore losers. I don't like when people go for personal shots in a game that's meant to be fun. But I especially don't like when people do both of the above to my friends. Fuck that noise. Any chance of me wanting to work with Jake on Kabru went out the window with that, and I'm sure he feels likewise based on that vote. If it makes sense, I might vote with him as a matter of necessity, but he's not long for this game if I have my say. Bye Felicia.

Normally I would've been more upset about the vote being delayed a few hours, but between the extenuating circumstances out of the hosts' control and the fact that Jake still would've been in the One World chat anyway, nothing noticeably changed. So, fuck it, what's two hours of waiting?

Anyway I like slither.io. It's not my best game, but I enjoy it. Can't wait to put up a high score and show Jake that he's not God's gift to competitions. "Oh mind you I’m the best competitor on this tribe. Not tooting my own horn, just looking back at past performances."??? Like, fuck you? One unnecessarily long endurance run in an early comp doesn't mean we should all just bow down to your *~clear challenge superiority~*. Different people are skilled at different things. 

I'm so glad nobody responded to his diatribe in the OW chat. The last thing he needed was to be enabled. His perspective is just that – HIS perspective. It's clear he doesn't really have a grasp of how this game is playing out, or else he might not have been the one to go last night.

Gage is super duper cute! But he never responds to my messages, so I am super duper not happy about that! Like, Gage, please. C'mon, Gage. Get it together. C'mon. I sent him what I did in the adventure, and you know the response I got? It was a riveting, rambling silence. Like...? What!? Didn't Gage WIN once or something?? How did he manage that??? Did he sleepwalk there, or were the other people in the final tribal council just that bad? I am completely befuddled.

Oh MJ really just threw me under the bus eh? I can't believe I got the full Olympics experience in one night. Choke.

Oh not me getting one of the highest scores on both my tribes for a flash game!? What a foreign concept. 

safe in both games, so i have time to work on RELATIONSHIPS and read my book on how to win survivor so i can win this!!!!

please help

mj and pat treating me like pawns for the adventure! love it.

ill be a fucking pawn for yall if it saves my ass but an idol or something WOULD be nice.

In other news, Jimmy is the bee's knees. Yes, he is! He is so very cool! Yes, he's hip!

me and kait on call

i think theres an imbalance of trust between mj and i.

i trust him wholeheartedly as hes my only close ally, but he sees me as expendable from what i get from our conversations. he barely responds and i obviously seem to be of lesser priority? but idk maybe im just paranoid, but im holding on for dear life

me pressuring mj into sending his screenshots of his latest chats and seeing almost all of them are about the game! how iconic.

LISTEN I REALLY WANNA KILL THE OA TONIGHT. LIKE I WANT OWEN TO LEAVE. i'm just in this STUPID FUCKENING SPOT in the middle of jenn and jimmy and LOGI-WAN????????? IS LEAKING SHIT TO JENN THAT I WANT JENN OUT ??? OR SOME SHIT LIKE WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT SDGJSDKLSD;  GOD. 

i have more to say but i will wait for after class but i'm still like i legit don't know what i wanna do

i'm gonna need a pair of cargo shorts for all the people logi-wan thinks i have in my pockets!!!

Sorry that I've been kinda AWOL but it's because I've been feeling pretty shitty about my position in the game as a whole. I'm very lucky to have Matt in the game who is always willing to have strategic conversations that I know will provide me with a secure outlet that's not going to make my position even worse. I told him I planned on making a fake idol but idk if I'll go ahead with exposing that I have an "idol" to my tribe due to current changes in circumstances that I'll talk about later. Jakey's exposing of the tight Malaysian core alliance has made them change their tune which I'm really happy about because I'm sure I'm the target tonight (thanks Owen, you suck), but thankfully Jimmy exists and wants to work with me to pull off some move because the Malaysian's are going whack and he is thankful I saved him all that time ago back in Easter Island? I- I didn't do that much except kill my own game but thank you for willing to switch shit up! 

It looks like their might be a chance I will stay tonight, however there are several different stories being played out on this tribe. Logan told me flat out it's me. However Jimmy told me Logan approached him and Jenn to vote out Gage? I don't get why when clearly Gage showed him loyalty? I'm not complaining cuz it means the vote would not be on me. But I think it's gonna be on me since Jenn reassured that it probably was. So it would come down to MJ voting with Jenn/Jimmy over Owen/Logan. Alternatively I could be a total bitch and expose a plan if I'm totally unsure what to do, or 10 minutes before tribal I could post my fake messages and idol that I found to hopefully send them into a panic and switch their votes off me and onto someone not me. It's a tough position to be in cuz I don't want to reveal I've an idol and for it to backfire somehow, but also how it may look untrustworthy to my alliance if I "had" an idol and didnt "play" it. So hmm. I'm concerned because Gage seems to be going after Logan now but is trying to get Owen? I fear this is where it could blow up. 4 of these people are going to both tribals so it's a very tricky situation. If the plan falls apart, the votes might just all fall back onto me because I'm the "easy vote". I have to see what happens and make a calculated decision before tribal that will work in my favour.  

It could be game over, or game on. 

So like, I want Gage to go home. He is going to both tribals like Jenn, Jimmy, and Owen. Lydia and Owen are in the minority in Game B, so I'm thinking they're going to be easy boots because Gage is close to Kait. Well, I don't want that to happen, obviously. They're both my allies. But I'm also on good terms with Jenn and Jimmy, so I don't want them to go. Kait isn't an option because Kait isn't going to both tribals, and no one wants an angry, scorned Kait in the game. That's like leaving a provoked bear in the game. No thanks! Plus I'm good with her, too. That leaves Gage, and he made it super easy for me to want him gone by not speaking to me at all, lol. I sent you the receipts of my adventure, the least you can do is respond! Rude!!! Anyways, yeah, Gage should go. Also, he is trying to target me, I guess? Which is also not cool. Good Guy Gage is going down.

please god

WHOA I WON THAT IMMUNITY HUH!!!!!! im honestly not that worried if we lose just bc ik i have mj ruthie and matt on my side no matter what and that would at least tie it. but basically i tried to go on call with owen and kait to smooth over some relationships... i rly intended to work with owen if he would let me but he went and told kait the one piece of information i told him which was that i heard that lydia and kait made a deal to stay.. owen u rly know how to piss me OFF huh

i had a pretty good call with kait and i hope it was enough that if mj did keep me if we lose on tribe b, she wouldn't flip her shit and come after mj. mj is literally the saving grace of my game and ill do anything for him in this game. if that means i gotta be fake with kait and pretend like i wanna smooth things over and work together then ill do that. anyway ruthie is a legend and will win this season bookmark THAT

I've been laying SUPER low.  Like, I apologized to Kait and told her I was close to voting her out because she scares me as a player or whatever, but that I really wanted to work with her because we didn't get a chance to work together in Trashy, and then I also threw in how my good friend Ashley Sarah liked playing with her so much when Kait was catfishing in Canaries and hopefully we bonded a bit.  SHE FREAKING TERRIFIES ME but if working with her keeps me around longer, I'm all for it.  I'm not going to try to make anymore big moves for awhile because as much as I want to, I don't want to piss off the rest of the people in the tribes.  

My goal now is to stay close with Steffen, Steve and keep talking to Pat because he's just so nice.  He's genuinely the nicest person playing in my opinion.  I'm also going to stay close to Jakey, he's my number one, and I'm going to stay close to Carson as well, and just try to stay on his good side and stuff.  I don't want to take Carson to the end, there is no way.  As much as I love Steffen I'd rather not take him to the end either.  Jakey I could see, going all the way with but we both have to stay in order for anything like that to actually happen.  

I don't know if I made the right choice in putting my foot down about voting Jimmy over Gage. Every option seems bad in my opinion, but I think I've made it pretty clear I want Gage around, just to turn my back and vote him next time... I don't know. This will probably bite me in the ass somehow, like maybe Gage is lying to me and Lydia will end up going, or idk god knows what will happen....

Nobody has really talked to me since I went to dinner at 6:30... So part of me just feels like I'm getting clocked on both tribes. Either way, I guess I'll see what happens. 

I don't want this to be the end, really, and I don't know if it's smart to try and take control in a game where everything spreads like fire and is painfully obvious. I just gotta keep crossing my fingers, huH!

Time off???? from this game????? A concept! I don't know what to do with my hands.

gage is leaving????? maybe.... even tho i'd prefer owen leaving but... everything is so risky and shaky at this point im so KJDFHJKDHS NNNNNNNNNNNNNNN 

This may be my last confessional! I decided against playing the fake idol card because I didn't want it to blow up the plan currently in place. If it goes how I hope I should survive but I've still got low expectations. Secondly, I'm a bad explainer of things and I didn't want to get caught out and laughed at because I made a silly idol. It's a card I'll keep in my pocket if I survive. If not, I'll be thankful to those who tried to keep me in the game and I'll wish my allies luck in surviving. But fingers crossed and all the other stereotypical survival things to say. Lets goooooooo

I guess Gage is coming for me, so I had to switch my vote against him. If he knew how much I'd been doing to protect his ass, maybe he'd think differently.

It's a shame when people's stupid decisions prevent others from doing the right thing. Oh well! STUPID.

I had three calls the hour before tribal with Jenn, Lydia, and Owen and they were all concerned with getting Gage out, and then he gets voted out unanimously in both games. I'm glad all that time I spent trying to get him out wasn't wasted. Bye-bye, Gage! Don't target me next time, okay?

Whew I am so happy I survived but extremely sad that it came at Gage's expense. I really would've loved to work with him because he's honest, caring, charming etc. He's just a all round good guy and buddy. I'm also interested that suddenly I'm making a whole pack of new friends? Kait (although drunk) is talking to me for the first time since day 1 and secondly Owen has found his voice to chat to me! So I'm very interested to see what position this could put me in. I'm also shook that Matt thought my idol was real? I told him it was fake before I made it gdfihgkol. Maybe I should pull it out if it's convincing enough! Also I'm surprised Lydia came to me and goes "you're welcome". Um. I'm not sure you swung the vote on my tribe to Gage considering there was talk of it being him at lunchtime today? Like. I'm crediting Jenn and Jimmy for that one so sorry this isn't Port Royal and I'm a different player. Just cuz I'm in a shitty position doesn't mean I'm not beginning around for whatever scraps I can find. I HOPE this tribal is  turning point for me, but you hosts are sending us all to tribal again so I'll probably get taken out as the easy vote, but I trust Jenn/Jimmy to at least tie it for us.