#honestly tho I could not guess these two are played by the same man if I had no idea who patrick was

[ormymarius]

Patrick Wilson as Ed Warren and Orm Marius, my beloveds

[sliced-peaches]

hit it off right

Jeong Jaehyun x reader | 5.8k | friends to…?

After hearing about him for what seems like forever, you finally meet Jungwoo’s hot roommate. But it’s a lot more wholesome than anything else.

📀 now playing: say it - maggie rogers // decent - bas, amaarae // perfect places - lorde // dear to me - electric guest

a/n: seeing Jae getting drunk with YoungJi did something for me. I miss him and it’s really hard being a military wife. this is part of a larger collection coming soon, so nothing spicy. pls enjoy~

mentions of: other nct members, bff! Jungwoo, alcohol consumption, marijuana usage, light flirting, honestly tho everyone is just shy and cute and silly

A few days before the party, you’d asked Jungwoo what kind of wine his roommate liked. Since it was a celebration, you figured you should at least bring a gift.

“He told me to tell you to not bring anything.”

“How could he even know?” You whine, incredulous.

“Because I know you and your habit of balling out on people who are being celebrated.”

There’s not much you can say to that. You are known to bring a nice bottle of something that suits the taste of the one being celebrated. You love to see the joy on someone’s face when they get a tailored gift.

It’s the least you could do for someone when you notice their hard work. It feels good to appreciate someone, especially a friend like Jungwoo. It’s only natural you’d extend the perks to his roommate, right?

“You talk to your roomie about me?” You coo, poking his cheek. Setting his coffee cup down, he nods, seemingly pleased to share this piece of information with you.

“In passing. I told him you were coming, that I invited your coworker, too. I’ve gushed about her to him a few times. He just kinda smiled? Not in a weird way. Like… I don’t know. He just stared at me for a few seconds. Then he said he was happy to hear that. So-“

“Sounds like he’s in full support.”

Jungwoo smiles, bringing the cup back to his lips. Then he gives you a sly look over the rim before he speaks again.

“He also asked me about you.”

“What about me?”

“I guess I talk about you all the time, right? I told him about your art, all the art shows you’re in. I’m sure I’ve shown him a picture of you before, like from that time we went to the beach.”

“You showed your roommate my bikini photos?”

His eyes widen and he starts to immediately apologize when raise your hands to cut him off.

“Wait. Did he like them?”

“He… didn’t say much of anything if I’m being honest.”

“Oh.”

“Which doesn’t really mean anything, honestly. Sometimes he just doesn’t have anything to say.”

“…okay that’s a little better.”

It’s hard to imagine Jungwoo living with someone who doesn’t talk as much as he does.

The way you two often communicate is rapid-fire, dramatic, occasionally riffing off the other’s jokes. He likes to share his thoughts out loud and use you as a sounding board. You like to ramble about abstract art ideas and the special interest of the week.

Trying to picture your yap king living with someone who probably makes three facial expressions a year (says Jungwoo) makes you wish you could be a fly on the wall.

“How much have I told you about Jae? I know he’s always out, or at work so….”

His roommate’s name is Jaehyun. All you really know about him is that he’s close in age to Jungwoo, he used to be really competitive m, and that he has a cousin somewhere in Europe. Not much else past that.

“One time I was over you showed me a photo or two from when you guys were in high school. I’ve seen him in your stories too.”

“You said he was cute! I forgot about that.”

You recall a guy with dark hair and a cute bowl cut, wearing the same basketball jersey as Jungwoo. When you said cute, you were referring to their round faces and goofy hair cuts. The more recent pictures on Instagram were usually from an angle where you couldn’t really see his face, but he was always dressed nice from what you could tell.

“He was! Little cutie stranger man.”

There’s a beat.

“Okay, so about that. He’s was cute but now he’s, like, super handsome.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, he’s hot. Bulked up, started dressing nicer, smells good. His jawline is insane. He should actually model. I didn’t know he was going to look like that when we grew up, you know?” He shakes his head in disbelief.

“Damn, you ever told him all that?”

“All the time, actually. He’s so sick of me. At this point I’m just saying something that’s objectively true. You’d be lying if you thought he was ugly. So that being said-“

He whips his head towards you, you watch a plot and scheme form in his brain. His lips curl into something devilish.

“Careful not to fall in love with my roommate, yeah?”

You blink at him, two times. Three times.

“Huh?”

His words sounded like a warning, but it feels like he very much would prefer you do the opposite.

“I just feel like he’s someone you’d fall for.”

“You’ve never seen me fall for anyone. Not once since you’ve known me.”

“Exactly. Which is why I’m saying… I think you guys will get along well.”

“Don’t hope too hard, but I’m sure he’s lovely.”

Sighing, Jungwoo offers you a sympathetic look. You ignore it and instead check for any emails from the art festival you’re vending at later in the month. It’s not much help, as you can still feel his eyes on you.

“I think he’d be good for you.”

“I don’t think playing matchmaker with your friends is that good of an idea,” you clipped.

Right before you met Jungwoo in senior year of college, you’d been in a relationship that ended pretty badly. You were in love, and you think he was, too. At one point at least.

But when things run their course, and you stay in them too long, they start to drain you of everything.

You’d lost a lot of time and energy trying to be pretty enough, interesting enough, desirable enough to keep the spark alive. To keep his attention. But to no avail. It was like he was just waiting for you to leave.

After a while, feeling empty and settling for whatever he could toss your way was too much to bear. It was just time to let go.

It was hard when at the end, you realized he just didn’t love you like you loved him. But was too scared himself to be honest with you about it.

Heartbreak was one thing, but grieving a relationship that wasn’t all that real was another. It took you a long time to move through that pain.

Jungwoo watched you put a lot of effort into rebuilding your personality, your self worth, your confidence. He was nothing but supportive, as were your other friends, dragging you to every show in the city, joining you at a new cafe or listening to your new ideas about art you’d been neglecting. And Jungwoo’s friends were a wonderful addition to your life, as well.

It was beyond being choosy- you’d taken yourself out of the dating game altogether, focusing on work, art, your friends. Yourself.

Now you were very careful not to let anyone in and disrupt that. It’s been a beautiful life to fall back into; you’d hate to lose it to the wrong person.

Jungwoo is nothing but understanding still, squeezing your arm instead of pushing any further.

“Well, regardless, I know you’ll get along well. Even as friends.”

You roll your eyes at him, a small smile creeping back onto your face.

“Don’t look into his eyes, though, seriously. He’s something else.”

On the trip over to Jungwoos apartment your friend tells you about her day, catching you up on some work gossip and her roommates string of interesting dates.

She laughs at how engrossed you are in her words, loving how excited you are to listen to the tea. You’re asking questions, connecting dots. The entertainment is delicious.

“I’m never on shit, so I’m living vicariously through you guys,” you sigh.

“We’re on shit tonight! I’m excited to party with Jungwoo.”

You flit your eyes over to her. “Yeah?”

“Girl, yes. He seems like a good person to party with. He’s always so bubbly and sweet when we go out for coffee, and always supportive of you so he’s good in my book.”

You wish she knew why you were smiling so big.

“He is a sweetheart, and a wonderful friend. I feel like you guys will get along well, I’m surprised we haven’t all gone out before.”

Pulling your phone out, you open your camera to check for a lipgloss reapplication when text from Jungwoo comes through.

woo-ah: 🎶 what’s ur ETA?🎵

“C-can I be honest with you?”

Immediately you lock your phone, adjusting your body to give her your full attention.

“Of course you can.”

She glances towards the driver, bringing her hand up to cover her mouth like she’s telling you a juicy secret.

“I think he’s gorgeous.” Her cute confession has you both giggling like schoolgirls in the back of the rideshare. “Don’t tell him, please!”

“Babe, your secret is safe with me.” You pinch your fingers together, pretending to zip your lips. “You wanna hear a secret?”

Her eyes widen in anticipation.

“I think he thinks you’re cute, too.”

“Shut up, no way!”

“Let’s just say I have insider info.”

“Your secret is safe with me.”

you: appx 4 min 🤠

woo-ah: 🪩🕺🫶🏼

You lock arms with your friend as you lead the way into the apartment building, being here enough times to know what floor and that the right elevator is faster than the left.

She’s talking about the book her roommate just recommended her as you get to Jungwoos floor. You even ask her to send you a text, saying that she should start a bookclub as you rap your knuckles on the door.

Jungwoo opens the door, moving to hug you both and welcome you into the apartment.

“Come in, come in!”

Music is playing from a speaker, and a chorus of voices comes from the living room.

You walk ahead of Jungwoo and your friend, who are exchanging thank you’s for invitations and gifts of alcohol, and a chorus of voices welcomes you in the living room.

Doyoung and Donghyuck practically race and slide around in their socks to hug you and kiss you on the forehead and you pull them in for a haphazard group hug.

“Long time no see!” Doyoung clasps his hands together. “It’s so nice to have us all together at one time.”

“What a mom, we’re here to get shitfaced.” Donghyuck teasing Doyoung is secretly something you live for, but you pretend to defend Doyoung from him.

“Let us get a few drinks in before you start shit talking him, damn!”

The guys make sure you’re introduced to the rest of their friends, the ones you haven’t had a chance to meet yet. You’ve heard all their names in conversation, usually when talking about some social event or fun times they had back in school. It was wonderful to finally put names to faces, and they were more than happy to do the same for you.

“Jungwoo finally brought you around!” Renjun and Jaemin cheer. “We’ve been wanting to meet you for so long.”

You blush under all the affection from them.

“I’m so glad to finally meet you guys.”

“Come on, you have to try the cocktail YangYang made.”

Dragging you into the kitchen, you’re flooded by more introductions, jokes and insanely loud laughter, and it feels like you’ve been doing this for years with them already.

YangYang passes you a glass, a sliced lemon garnishing the side and all. You take one sip, then immediately take another. “Wow, this is delicious. Thank you!”

“There are three kinds of liquors in there,” he says, shooting you an apologetic look. “All light, but they told me I had to get everyone drunk, so-“

Before he can even try to apologize, stop him.

“That’s my kind of drink, then!” And you propose a toast with whoever’s in the kitchen.

The cheers begin to die down when someone walks into the kitchen.

Jungwoo has a lot of attractive friends. You knew this from the jump. He’s a model, he had model friends, friends who were in entertainment and the arts. From seeing whoever was on his Instagram story every few weeks, to getting drinks with everyone else occasionally, you’d gotten very used to being surrounded by pretty men.

Jungwoo did not prepare you well enough for Jeong Jaehyun.

“It’s our boy! Congratulations!”

The kitchen erupts into more greetings and well wishes as the man of the hour had just arrived. You sit back as everyone moves into pat him on the back, hug him or, like Donghyuck, kiss him right on the cheek.

Everyone’s voices just turn into background noise as you take him in.

He smiles the most beautiful smile you’ve ever been blessed enough to witness, and you have to force yourself to take a large sip of your drink so not to gawk at him.

Renjun and Jaemin motion for you to come closer, and you use the one solid second you have to steel your nerves as you step closer to them.

Jaemin slings his arm around you. “Jae, have you met our girl yet?”

Renjun playfully shakes his arm. “Jungwoo has been keeping her from us for eons.”

Jaehyun takes a step closer to you. He’s tall, much taller than you, so you have to tilt your head back to fully look at him.

And what a sight to see.

Jaehyun smiles again, a little shy but just for you. His eyes crinkle at the corners, smile so sincere and kind like he’s smiling at someone he’s known for years.

Extending his hand out to you, he wants to greet you properly. Shakily you place your smaller hand in his. But instead of shaking your hand, he uses both hands to gently hold it.

“It’s nice to finally meet you.”

The baritone voice almost knocks you on your ass.

Taking take a moment to will some confidence, some chill to come through when you speak, you swallow and push your shoulders back.

“You as well, Jaehyun. It’s been a long time coming, yeah?”

It’s taking everything in you to sound normal and relaxed, unfazed by this man.

He cocks his head to the side and laughs, his nose crinkling and smile lines that resemble whiskers making themselves visible. The sight makes your head spin.

“A very long time.” He releases your hand, and you place it against the side of your glass hoping it will absorb some of the heat from the exchange. “Thank you for coming.”

With your resolve expiring in seconds, you’re so thankful for Jungwoo making his way into the kitchen. While he introduces your work friend to Jaehyun, you shuffle out the kitchen alongside Renjun and Jaemin.

You sit on the armrest of the couch, listening to them bicker over what game the party should play first, remembering how to breathe.

Jaehyun quietly settles into a chair for one close to you, tuning into the commotion. He doesn’t make a move towards you, and you’re glad even if just for a moment. Out the corner of your eye, you take him in.

Handsome isn’t the right word to use, you think. He’s dressed clean and simple, nice jeans and a white t-shirt. The side profile is something unreal, perfect chiseled features but his face still soft and welcoming. His dark hair is slightly pushed back, a few stands falling over his forehead. He leans forward to tap Jaemin on the shoulder, complimenting him on ‘how big he’s gotten’ at the gym, with the younger preening under his praise.

Just in the short time in the same room, it’s clear that Jaehyun is like a big brother. And from what Jungwoo has told you is super sweet and caring. That alone makes you want to know him more, and makes him all the more attractive.

Looking over at you, he offers you a small smile which you mirror to avoid coming off as awkward. Noticing that you are both nursing the same drink, he raises his glass towards you for a small toast.

“To you and the summer,” you offer, raising your glass as you do so.

“I can drink to that.”

You take another large swig of your drink, hoping after the third your nerves can handle more than two sentences next time.

It’s silly, you think, to be this affected by a man. An attractive one, yes. But just a man. A friend of a friend, even.

Jungwoo’s words echo in the back of your mind, that he thought you and Jaehyun would get along well. Part of you doesn’t want to prove him right, but another part of you wonders if getting along with Jaehyun wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

So you try your best to start and make conversation.

“I heard about your promotion, congratulations!”

“Ah thank you,” he says, smiling into his cup. “It’s actually more of a career change.”

“Really? What are you going to be doing?”

He takes a minute to respond, and for a moment you wonder if he even heard in the first place. Before you can repeat yourself, however, he’s speaking again.

“I’m… writing music. Singing some, too. For me and for others.” He points over his shoulder with his thumb. “I’ll be working with Taeyong a lot, in his studio.”

Eyebrows raising, you lean in a bit.

“You sing, Jaehyun?”

“Sometimes.” He takes a drink. “I write stories on artists, interview people in music. Do some editing. The company I work for was really cool about letting me try different things, I really liked working for them.”

There’s a moment where you’re not sure if he’s going to speak again, and right when you think you should ask another question he continues.

“But I always wanted to sing my own songs, produce my own work. My current line of business has its perks, a lot of connections too. So I’ve been working on my own stuff on the side.”

You didn’t peg him as someone in performance- he’s so pretty you’re surprised he isn’t a model or an actor honestly. But he doesn’t seem to be anything anyone would think at first glance.

“That’s so exciting. Especially working with friends, I like Taeyongie’s music. And ’m really happy to hear you’re able to chase after your dream.”

“Thank you, I’m excited to share.”

He looks at you through his eyelashes as he takes another drink.

So we’re both trying to numb our nerves, you thought to yourself.

“I hope I get to hear some music from you soon.”

He casts another smile your way, and that’s when you know the liquor is kicking in because it doesn’t send you reeling this time.

“I hope you do, too. Soon.”

“Shots?”

Everyone gathers around in the living room, passing small glasses around to those partaking in alcoholic festivities tonight. You pass one to Jaehyun, who holds it up against the light.

“I haven’t taken a shot in a long time.”

“I got you the good shit, Jae.” Jungwoo holds up two expensive bottles. “Whiskey? Or gin?”

“Oh shit… let’s do the gin. Sticking with lights tonight.”

He asks for your preference, and you do the same.

Jungwoo opens the bottle of gin and pours the first round of shots for the night. After he pours his own, he holds his glass up for a toast.

“I know this is, like, the fourth toast of the night but it probably won’t be the last if I’m being honest.”

Taeyong groans. “I’m betting on at least seven in total.”

“Those are rookie numbers,” YangYang yells out, the younger boys cackling and suggesting higher numbers.

“Anyway!” Jungwoo bangs the gin bottle on the coffee table. “This is the emotional one. It’s the end of the summer and I hate to see her go. But we’re moving into fall, and falling into our new lives-“

Donghyuck pretends to yawn.

“Dude shut up, it’s just Jaehyun-”

“I’m not finished!” And he taps the bottle again, your head falling against the back of the couch in silent laughter. “Thank you all for being part of another summer and thank you guys for coming to celebrate one of my closest, oldest friends.”

“Literally.”

Doyoung throws a pillow at Donghyuck and motions for Jungwoo to continue.

Jungwoo turns to Jaehyun, who’s made his way onto the couch alongside you and your friend. “I’m happy to see you make your wildest dreams come true. I can’t wait to see you become the sexy superstar you were always meant to be. Cheers!”

The room is full of cheers and then groans from knocking back shots with no chasers, but it’s a pleasant burn as it slides down your throat.

You blow a kiss at Jungwoo, wiping a fake tear from your eye. “Your speech was beautiful. Very moving.”

The next hour is filled with mini beer pong (players had to sip water instead of alcohol, many thanks to Doyoung), stories about the boys time in school or how some of them met their partners, and shared soju.

The boys complain that he’ll cheat if he plays so instead Jaehyun shares a strong bottle of peach soju, his favorite, with you and your coworker.

At first, it’s very cute to just watch Jaehyun laugh at all of his friends antics. He enjoys listening, occasionally cracking a few jokes or making funny noises. But he’s more than happy to settle back into the couch and observe.

But he’s also big on being a good host, even if he’s the one being celebrated- if he isn’t offering you another drink he’s offering to grab something from the kitchen for you. They’re small but clear gestures to make sure his couch neighbors are as comfortable as he is.

He’s laid back and quiet but attentive- it has you swooning a bit. It’s a contrast to the rest of the men in the apartment, who are also sweet but characteristically loud and rambunctious. You love it, but it’s fascinating to watch Jaehyun hum and giggle to himself rather than dominate a conversation.

After you clear the second soju bottle and Jungwoo has wedged himself between you and your friend, you think you hear Jaehyun giggle beside you.

“What’s so funny?” You laugh, setting the empty bottle down on the coffee table.

He just shrugs, cheeks beginning to flush from the alcohol. He’s pretty like this, you think.

“Are you a silly drunk, Jae?” You tease, catching the attention of Donghyuck.

“Oh man, he’s gonna start getting real silly soon.” The younger man comes to sit on the armrest closest to Jaehyun, affectionately brushing his hair off his forehead. He weakly tries to swat Donghyucks hand away.

“I’m not silly,” he tries to argue, way too cute and whiny compared to the man you met just two hours ago.

“You’re sooo silly right now,” Donghyuck laughs. “She’s going to have to take care of you soon!”

His eyebrows shoot up and he tries to sit straighter, attempting to coolly settle against the back of the couch. “No, no. I’m fine. I’m-“

“Come get some air with us!” Jaemin and Donghyuck pull him up by his arms, with little to no resistance from Jaehyun. He just rolls his eyes as they pull him to his feet.

Jaemin cheers, pushing him towards the sliding door to the deck.

Looking over his shoulder, he nods at you. “Need anything while I’m up?”

You wave him off towards the door.

“No, I’m okay. Go get some air.”

With you beaming up at him, Jaehyun swears the room has gotten a few degrees hotter. The air will do him good.

Jaehyun finds you in the kitchen later, just finishing one of the cookies someone brought. You pass one to him and he finishes it in one bite.

“How many drinks in are you?”

“Shit… I’m at about four. Not including that shot.”

“I think I’m at about the same,” he says, shuffling closer to you at the kitchen island overlooking the living room.

There’s a moment of silence that you share, watching all of his and Jungwoos friends (and yours now) fill up the apartment with laughter (and some screaming- Renjun set Mario Kart up on the tv).

Your heart swells knowing how loved Jungwoo is, as well as Jaehyun.

But then it dawns on you that you haven’t seen Jungwoo or your friend in a while. Before you can mention that to Jaehyun, he bumps his hip against yours.

The alcohol might not have been enough to turn the alarms off in your brain yet, but your body is slow to react to him essentially snuggling into your side. He’s warm, and he smells warm too. Like a vanilla candle. There’s something else you can’t place, but it’s more than pleasant.

“I have to tell you a secret.” He whispers, and it’s cute and kind of whiny.

“A secret?” You say, barely over a whisper. He nods slowly, looking into the crowd.

He can’t see shit, in all honesty.

“I may or may not be a little crossed.”

“That’s what I smell on you?”

“Shit, is it bad?” Just like that, he’s a little more self conscious than he is silly. He smells his shirt in a few different places, earning a laugh from you.

“No, you’re fine. It’s because you’re so close that I can smell it.” He sighs and laughs almost at himself. “Is that where you and the boys went?”

“Yeah. I don’t usually smoke but it’s something like a special occasion.”

“Absolutely it is. You deserve it.”

He simply hums, letting a a few seconds pass before he speaks again.

“You smoke?”

“Weed? Rarely.”

“Cigs?”

“Not once in my life.”

“Good for you, we’re all nicotine addicts in here.”

“Vape away, I could never judge.”

At that you both turn towards the other at the same time, chests inches apart.

His eyes are low from the weed, the whites tinted red. He’s looking down at you, a silly, boyish grin on his lips. You can’t help but blush under his gaze, lips curving into a grin of their own.

“Thanks for coming tonight.” His voice is soft, barely audible. You feel yourself subconsciously leaning into him, wishing to hear him a little louder.

“Of course, I had to support the homie. And play wingman.”

He tilts his head back to glance around the room , the realization hitting him then.

“Oh shit, I haven’t seen them in a while.”

“Then I guess I did a good job. I barely did anything but whatever.”

He laughs, voice deep and rumbly. “You did great.”

He leans onto the counter, his arm resting closing to where your hip sits against the edge. He slowly shifts his eyes back over to you, looking over your frame. Just once, even his sluggish brain is careful not to get ahead of itself.

“I’m glad we finally got to meet.”

“I am too.” Your skin is on fire under his intense gaze. It’s not so much intense as it is just so warm, so amiable. You deflect to take some of the heat off of you, quite literally. “Jungwoo talks about you all the time.”

“Yeah? What does he say?”

That you’re so fucking handsome and I’d be stupid to lie and disagree.

“That you don’t say too much, but you’re a really good friend.”

A surprised look washed over his face, then he turns sheepish.

“He’s…… that’s sweet of him.” Jaehyun rubs the back of his neck, thinking on his next words as carefully as his crossed mind will allow him. “I’m glad you’re his friend. He needs someone like you.”

You tilt your head to the side.

“What do you mean?”

“Someone who isn’t as shy as him.”

“Haha, you think I don’t get shy?” It’s funny when you think back on how nerve wracking is was to shake his hand for the first time.

But he’s just giving you this knowing look now, a ghost of a smirk at the corner of his lips.

“If you do, you hide it well.” You could scream. Can he see right through you? “But seriously. You push him to do well.”

Jaehyun is slow to speak, but even inebriated he’s intentional. Something you’ve learned in just the past few hours about him is that it may take him a while to get his thoughts out, but it’s more than worth it to hear what he has to say.

You hang on to every pause like your life depends on it, eager to hear what comes out of his mouth next.

“Before you guys worked together, he was a lot more… reserved. And passive? Like, he’s good at everything he does. We know this. But… he never really sought recognition.”

“You’re right. But he deserves it.”

He nods while he thinks on his next words.

“Yeah. I remember in school he was just happy to pass and be included in things. Never attracted much attention to himself. Never wanted to be in the spotlight. But since working with you, he’s become proud of the work he does. His confidence has grown. He’s louder. Funnier. You pushed him a lot.”

“That’s all him, he works hard-“

“He does, you pushed him though. When he finally started modeling last year all he could do was say how thankful he was for you. How you encouraged him, helped him with headshots. Went shopping with him and made sure he felt good going into auditions. And it took off.”

Your breath catches in your throat.

“He… he said that? Really?”

“He did. You’ve been a very good friend to him.”

Blinking away the tears that started to pinprick behind your eyes, you smile at Jaehyun whose own eyes are filled with mirth. Even cross faded, Jaehyun’s words were so sincere and kind.

“Are you crying?”

You sniffle, using your thumbs to collect any tears in the corner of your eyes so not to ruin your makeup.

“I was gonna but I’m okay.”

He laughs that hearty laugh again and ruffles your hair. It’s such a small gesture, but so comfortable. Domestic even. Like you’ve been friends for years. It makes your heart even fuller than it already is and if he keeps it up, it’ll burst before the end of the night.

The alcohol coursing through you is doing nothing but spread this warmth, double time. Happiness feels good coursing through you.

“Let’s get some water, yeah?” He cocks his head toward the fridge. “Doyoung brought some sparkling water.”

You begin to follow him as he takes a few steps backwards. “What flavor?”

“We have…” He starts, opening the door to the fridge. “I can barely see. Wow.”

“Move, I’ll look.”

You hip check him out of the way, and hear someone come into the kitchen behind you.

“I’m no better, but this looks like ginger peach. And calamansi.”

“Pass me a calamansi, please? You want a sparkling water, Taeyong?”

“Do you think it’s a good mixer for gin?” He asks, loud enough for someone in the living room to hear.

Then, that someone yells out: “Another round of shots?”

Laughing, you hand Jaehyun his sparkling water, and pass a ginger and peach flavored water to Taeyong. “Let’s find out, yeah?”

More cheering is heard as you shuffle back into the living room and let Doyoung pour the next round of shots.

He’s a sweetheart and pours the shots right into you and Taeyongs cans, Jaehyun sneakily placing a sealed water bottle next to your foot.

It’s well into the night, the hour a single digit when the party starts to die down.

Jungwoo is in the loveseat for one and a half, your friend snuggled into his side.

You’ve found yourself back on the couch with Jaehyuns head resting on your shoulder and one of his legs swung over Taeyongs. Miraculously, Donghyuck has found a way to lay across you all comfortably.

“I’m going to order a ride home for us soon,” your friend says through a yawn. Donghyuck is already whining, earning some light smacks from the older boys under him.

“We’re so comfy, why would you want to mess up our cuddle pile?

“I’m not cuddling, I’m being leaned on,” you tease, grinning down at Jaehyun who can barely hold his eyes open. He’s trying his best to focus on one of your faces because he sees three, but he’s not complaining.

“Hm… my bad.” He moves to sit up, but Donghyuck just nestles into him even further, and Jaehyun can’t seem to muster up enough strength to (care) knock him into the floor. “I really… I really did try.”

Jaehyun has hit peak silly hours. From little hums and cute noises to the worst dad jokes you’ve heard in a while, you understand what Donghyuck meant earlier. Jaemin and Jungwoo even got him to cutely pose for drunk selfies earlier.

Laughing through your nose, you use the hand that’s free to reach around and pat his cheek affectionately. In this state he instinctually leans into your touch, humming in approval. You have to fight the urge to squeeze his cheeks. “Jae you gonna be alright?”

“I told you she was going to have to take care of you!” At that, he and Taeyong had enough and pushed him into the floor. He lets out a squawk as his body hits the ground with a light thud. “Fuck. It’s comfier down here anyway.”

Jungwoo slowly stands up, helping your friend to her feet. “So Donghyuck is sleeping here, literally right there. No blanket. I don’t want to see you using something weird as a replacement either.”

While the boys still present start to bicker some more, Jaehyun taps your knee to get your attention.

“I’ll be okay. Just got a little carried away.”

“You’re okay. Let’s get you to bed then?”

His eyes open a little wider, mouth parting to say something. You wait.

“Are you staying over?”

“No I’m going home tonight.”

He pouts, and it almost sends you to another dimension.

“Aw don’t make that face, I’ll be back soon.”

“Okay. Good.”

You call to Taeyong, who really isn’t that much better, but he does help you get Jaehyun off the couch and down the hall to his bedroom.

You let Taeyong handle the hard part of getting him out of his jeans and under the covers, heading to the kitchen to fill a glass of water. “Jungwoo, you have any painkiller?”

“In that drawer by the stove.” He stands beside you in the kitchen. “For Jae?”

“Yeah. You want any water?”

“Nah I was good tonight. I’ll be okay.” He purses his lips. “You’re sweet for that. Taking care of him.”

“I’m not doing anything I wouldn’t do for you.”

“I know… exactly what I mean.” You shake your head and walk to Jaehyun’s room, entering while Taeyong exits.

“He’s decent, just whiny.”

“Thank you, I’ll just leave this for him then.”

You approach the side of the bed where he’s sprawled out, eyes barely open but you can see them following you even in the dark.

“Brought you some water. And some painkiller. Take it when you can, yeah?”

“Hm. Tell Jungwoo to give Hyuck a blanket.”

You chuckle and ruffle his hair before moving to leave.

“Have a good night, Jaehyun.”

“Hmm…”

unknown number: hey it’s jaehyun

unknown number: jungwoo gave me your number. thanks for coming yesterday. don’t be a stranger!

[pocketizz]

Hellooooo! This is kinda a long post today but it’s a dump of a lot of stuff and some ig ‘backstory’ to one of my friends… Enjoy!

—————————————————

I was meant to go into work today (only volunteering at a charity shop) But i got no sleep last night so i didn’t go 😔 went into town anyways with my mum to get some bits for the house, also got my dad a toblerone bc his birthday is soon!

i got him a wine bottle holder that’s in the shape of a car for his main gift (he wanted it i don’t get the appeal tho). He’s made a little man cave for himself at the house, made his own bar and a pool table that turns into a flat table to play ping pong on (it’s v cool) he also makes all his own wine now???? Not complaining tho, he’s got so many bottles it means i can steal one or two here and there without him noticing :P

Speaking of alcohol, I got invited to go to a party with my friends and their freinds this friday but i said my mum wouldn’t let me go bc i didn’t want to hang around a bunch of people i hardly know, get drunk, and then have to get either a bus home or call my mum whilst drunk and i didn’t want either of them :P

My ex-girlfriend (let’s call her H) has been msging me a lot recently, she wants to meet up in aug when she’s back from a holiday. I don’t reallyyyyyyy want to… I love her (as a friend now) but she’s been pretty rude to my bsf and her bf recently (my bsf ‘S’ Her bf ‘Al’). She told both sides that the other was $hing bc of being in a relationship and how ‘stressful’ it was. Although S has struggled w that before and currently, she was not doing so bc of a relationship, and Al doesn’t and hasn’t????? H is just such a liar honestly, it’s been the same since we first met, she’ll just make shit up: one example of this was when we were in yr9, she told me that a girl in our yr had called me ‘fat and ugly’ so she punched this girl in the face (in front of other people), gave her a black eye, and told her to go to the nurse and say that she’d just walked into a door or fallen over or smth.

Reasons i know this is fake/a fat lie:

1. She supposedly did it in front of others, if this was the case it would be a big thing, my whole yr were pretty close at the time so this story would’ve spread quickly. I never heard anything about it happening.

2. H would not tell me who it was. I was genuinely upset and surprised that someone had said that abt me, and wanted to know who had said that so i could either confront them or just stay clear away from them. She made it into some sort of game, where i had to guess who it was who’d said it. This upset me even more so she told me it was sm1 who i went to primary with. For the rest of the week i scouted out every single person at that school who went to the same primary as me to see if anyone had a black eye or looked injured but no one did.

3. When i asked H about it more recently she told me it was this girl called ‘T’ …. i hadn’t spoken to T since at least yr3 and had never interacted with her in secondary school, why she would care abt what i looked like makes no sense… H also supposedly had a crush on T during yr10, why she would have a crush on a girl she punched in the face i have no idea…

So i doubt that really happened. She also just lies about little stupid things, the sports she plays, the careers she has/had, Apparently she was supposed to play Enid Bingham (the emo one) from stranger things but she turned the roll down bc of school (she would’ve been 11/12 at the time of casting, enid is supposed to be 16/17) (maybe, idk but a lot older than 12) and supposedly she’s been in tons of films and shows but she just doesn’t want to tell anyone what she’s been in…. sureeeee

You should see some of the shit she sends me jesus christ, all of that soppy shit on tt like the ‘This is how i see you’ slideshows that are art pieces, don’t get me wrong it was cute when we were dating, but now that we’re not i find it kinda weird. i should tell her but knowing her she would cause some shite bc of it.

Recently she blocked everyone on our gc for ‘no reason’, S then asked on this gc ‘So you blocked us and made us upset and worried for you for ‘no reason’?’ she got PISSED at this ( copy and pasted from the gc)

‘You don’t get to do that’

‘You don’t get to guilt trip me and make it all about yourself that’s not right’

She wasn’t guilt tripping??? She was upset for a valid reason and worried about you for a valid reason (H has struggled with their MH before as well as $uicidal thoughts ect so people are (RIGHTFULLY) worried when she blocks everyone and drops off the face of the earth for a day!

When i msged her later asking why she blocked everyone she said (copy and pasted again)

‘It’s just so I don’t get careless and start upsetting people cause I’ve been a bit short recently so I’m like punishing myself’

Which sucks don’t get me wrong, i don’t want her to feel as though she has to ‘punish’ herself bc she’s had a short fuse atm (probably bc she’s stressed from gcse season) But how can you say this after doing the exact thing you just said you didn’t want to do?!?!!!! i didn’t respond to that msg bc it just pissed me off seeing it after she had been so rude to S…

(Quick lore dump of me and H’s friend/relationship)

- Became friends in yr9 through two mutual friends

- i had a fat crush on her in yr9 and so did she but we never said anything

- She then dated my bsf and i felt v awkward abt being around them both

- Yr 10 a mutual ‘Friend’ drove us apart

- End of yr10, this ‘Friend’ was a pos who ‘Exiled’ (their words not mine) me and my friend (we’ll call her ‘K’) from our friend group for not hanging out with M (the ‘friend’ for less than 3 days…)

-end of yr 10 Me and H are friends again ‼️‼️‼️

- (yr 11) At S’s house for a sleepover, both drunk and during truth or dare she gets asked by sm1 ‘what’s the longest you’ve ever had a crush on sm1?’ She says just under 3yrs. How long had we been friends? Just under 3 yrs, coinky dink i think not.

- One thursday i do drugs for the first time (in school ik please don’t judge i was going through it) I feel like shit all day, passing out being sick ect but refuse to go home. Next day i stay off bc im coming down and still feel like shit. Sat morning i get a big confession text from her ‘i’ve liked you forever i feel bad hiding it from you i don’t like lying to you’ (but she does…. so often…) later that month we’re dating. It’s awkward. It’s horrible. She never talks to me in person and always avoids me which takes skill bc we go to the same school and are in a lot of the same lessons so???? She wants a ‘break’ bc GCSEs will be stressful, i say ‘let’s just break up then’ bc i was pissed at her for doing it over text rather than to my face, a few gcse’s later me and S are walking around town after an exam and she tells me ‘H really wants to ask you out again and is just wating for exams to be over’ I say ‘ew’ i msg her saying ‘i don’t want to be in a relationship with you again, im saying this now so i don’t have to potentially turn you down face to face in the future’

She says okay i’ll stop

She doesn’t, she keeps on being flirty sending me texts about how much she loves me or misses me (it’s so much worse if she gets drunk) and i try my best to let her down gently each time but she never seems to get the hint.

So yeah!

Now you know a little bit more about me and H :0

I’ll write some more tomorrow but for now i’m going to bed!

Good night anyone reading, i hope you’ve had a great day you deserve it! <3

[princeshroob]

Okay, so it's officially been a year since I started playing, and I was wondering if I wanted to do something for it...or even if I could do something, but I eventually came up with the idea to go over my squad in order of first acquiring them, all the way to the present

(I swear to Terra, if I get something notable from free pulls before this comes up, I'm gonna explode)

...So uh, I wanted to have Mudrock and Surtr in the same picture, but they were too far apart for that, so screw it, I'm going with two pictures at once here! Anyways, in case you didn't know, I got into this game because of Mudrock and waited until she was rate-up before rerolling, and this is basically what I ended up with. Crazy thing, I actually got her twice in the same 10 roll, so I got to enjoy her with -1 DP cost immediately! And then when I went to pull more in hopes of getting Surtr (who was the shoperator at the time) I immediately got her from a single headhunting ticket! Amazing!! And yeah, that's why I wanted them in the same picture together.

Anyways, you can also see Angelina and Bagpipe there. Angelina was from the Newbie pool, and like Mudrock I also got two of her. But...meh, I didn't really feel like building her up too much. I did e1 her, but honestly, if I got her much later on, she'd probably be sitting in e0 Purgatory. Bagpipe, on the other hand, was the first 6* I got from a Top Operator tag, and that was a heck of a lucksack! I actually got her twice total from recruits, and then another pot from the CC shop. Two more pots and she'll be epic!

so uh, anyone else in those two screenshots...Oh, Utage? I got her that early?? Dang, never realized she was with me for as long as Mudrock XD. Also Myrtle is also e2, but I think pretty much everyone has e2d her, if only for access to e2 supports. Perfumer and Cuora were much later e2s, sometime after Il Siracusano, I think? Oh yeah, I guess Indra is a bit notable in how she's a recruit-exclusive 5*, but that's it.

Hmm, a bit less things of note here. Lumen was very recently promoted to e2, although I did neglect to get his potentials since I was a bit preoccupied with getting Mudrock to e2. At least his event should rerun real soon. Meteor, Cliffheart, Courier, and Ethan I promoted to e1 since I've seen guides use them pretty often. Gavial I kinda quickly fell in love with after her Alter came out, so that was definitely a waifu e2 there! Saria tho, oh boy. She's so freaking awesome! Definitely one of my best recruit lucksacks!

Now, I think it was around this time where CC#9 started. I had Surtr that I've seen Risk 18 strats for, and I've seen strats that used Horn, so I basically fused those two strats together so I could use easier risks overall.

...Ah, funny that the three e2s on this image are those three. Anyways, Exusiai was, yet again, another recruit lucksack, and she does so much damage! Well, so long as the enemies don't have too much defense, but there's ways to make up for that. Texas was from the pinboard missions, nothing unusual there. Lappland was from the 5* selector new players get, and I got her because man, having her earlier would've made SN so much less painful...but also, just having her in general is nice. Also, Elysium I got as my guarantee 5* when pulling on a banner that had him, so that was pretty sweet.

Hoo boy, here we go. Imma be real, when I first saw Sideroca, my mind instantly went "I have to get her" and, well, she's the welfare operator from the W event, so of course I did. Also, you might think it's funny that Gavialter and Blaze are right next to each other. Well, I rolled a bit on the banner in hopes of getting Chalter (Not that hard tho, since the odds weren't exactly in my favor) and I ended up getting Gavialter. As for Blaze...shoperator. Even after rolling Gavialter. XD. I just think she's cute! Also, Click was promoted because the event made me realize how weak my caster game was at the time, so I thought I'd e2 her as a sort of budget option. Wasn't really ready to promote Amiya at the time, so this had to be an acceptable compromise.

(If you're wondering why I didn't mention Amiya before...did I really need to? Everyone has to promote her in order to complete chapter 8. That's just how it is.)

Oh right, around this time was when the first Trials for Navigator event started. I...can't quite recall if I did Ultimate TN-4, but I'm pretty sure I got all the rewards at least, so there's that.

Oh, and there's also CC#10. I...barely remember what I did, and past me didn't exactly do a good job of actually posting the clear screen of risk 18. Man, they really dropped the ball on that. I definitely baited the cannon with Mudrock tho, no way am I gonna forget her pivotal role there!

OKAY, I'M LOOKING OVER MY SCREEN AND THE SCREENSHOTS I TOOK AND I COMPLETELY MISSED BLUE POISON! Ugh, she deserves better than to be skipped over, though to be fair, I was trying to focus on getting all my 6*s screenshotted at least, but anyways, she's e2 as well.

Anyways, Jaye there is e2, my first male e2 actually, and Ptilopsis I actually got from the 5* selector we got last anniversary (I think I'm gonna go for Warfarin with the next one btw, not like I can lucksack her in headhunting outside of kernal) and she's been very helpful! Astgenne, the welfare from the seemingly mythical Dorothy event, was so cute I couldn't not e2 her! Pinecone I e2'd cuz I was coping about not having Chalter, and Hibiscus Alter I e2'd cuz purple hair is too good! As for Fartooth...I considered building her, heck I even promoted her to e1, but I just have too many other operators that I would rather build.

Hoo boy, this. This is undoubtedly the start of where my power skyrocketed! Let's get the elephant in the room out of the way, I originally wasn't gonna go for Mlynar, but I decided that I might as well go until a 6* (though my track record tends to go otherwise if I don't get a good result) and I thankfully got him, and oh boy has he been integral in a lot of my hard clears! Nightingale...right, I got her and Fartooth from the standard banner with Saga and Mountain cuz those were both 6*s I had an interest in. Well, unlike Fartooth, I actually built her (though it was long after pulling her) and she's been pretty helpful keeping my team alive through heavy arts damage. Also Proviso I promoted to e2 and it had nothing to do with her base skill and everything to do with how cute she is XD. Whislash I was absolutely dying to get so you bet your bottom dollar I e2'd her almost immediately! Ifrit I got from yellow cert shop, and she's been pretty helpful when I can make good use of her. Chen I just happened to get with a Top Op + Nuker combo cuz why not? Didn't like my other options at the time much. Mostima, unfortunately, was a Top Op recruit that I didn't want cuz I wanted Ceobe, but oh well.

Anyways, if Mlynar wasn't enough, how about the time I pulled FREAKING SKALTER WHILE BREAKING PITY AFTER SPARK? Like, she would've been my spark if I had lucksacked Nearl Alter, so that's basically the same exact event in my mind. Anyways, aside from her, I didn't get any off-rates in that banner, so I was left with 2 Penance and 4 Texas Alters from that banner. Ceobe, as I mentioned, was a huge want for me, so I of course got her from the yellow cert shop, and then Horn was from the 6* selector at that time, and she's also been super helpful for me since then. Especially for IS#3, dear lord is she good against the first endboss there.

Right, this is around when CC#11 started. Risk 18 was absurdly easy that I didn't even need a guide for that (though my huge spike in power was also a factor.) I did push for higher risk though, and ended up with risk 25.

Almost getting towards the end here. Mizuki was a spook from the Gnosis banner (I primarily wanted Aurora) and, while he may not be the best 6* I could've got, I still wanna e2 him real soon. Kal'tsit was from yellow cert shop (which was during that absolutely horrific time period of Yostar forgetting Saga exists) and Magallan was just a random Top Op roll. Not building her, too small brain to use her well. Mountain was from the gamma headhunting ticket, and he was the one I wanted the least, but I still wanted him...even if my post at the time didn't look like I did I am an unappreciative jerk but anyways, it turned out to be for the better that I got him over Pozyomka. Lin was an absolute lucksack from free rolls on the banner, and I actually went out of my way to e2 her during the event! Lava Alter I e2'd cuz again, purple hair. Then there's Eyja, who was another yellow cert grab. Do I need to say anything about her? She's been the top Caster in the game since Day 1, with only Goldenglow being a possible threat to that title! (though for top caster in my heart, that title belongs to Ceobe XD)

I think both Trials for Navigator 2 and CC#12 were well after this, but the later operators I got weren't that important for that, so I'll just go over them here. Except...I barely remember what I did for TN#2. I just know that I did the Ultimate trial, so there's that. CC#12 though, my memory's a bit more clear on that. I did some strategizing for a few risks above 18, then changed them a bit to get even higher, all the way up to 26, exceeding CC#11 by a single risk! I honestly feel proud about that!

And now we have reached the present day. Rosa and Pozy both spooked me during the Yato Alter banner, the latter of which I built up quickly. And oh boy, is she super powerful! Even in the current event, she's been integral in dealing with the boss super quickly in my auto deploy setup! But Rosa sadly will take a backseat while I wait for Typhon, because believe you me, there's no timeline where I don't get her! Yato of course I had to hit the hard pity for, but she's been working very well for me. Weedy was another random top op. She was supposedly good for CC#12, but that didn't really convince me to build her sadly. Saga I have waited TOO FREAKING LONG for her to be in the yellow cert shop. And of course, Goldenglow I got with the 6* selector from the store as of now! Oh, also I got FEater to e1 max cuz she's super cute and I hope to e2 her some day.

Aaaaaand that's it. Man, it took a while to get this done that I actually wrote this in a few sessions cuz my attention span is...not great. But at least I got it done in time!

[cacklingblobbittyrabbitty]

super super unhinged rainbow magic post 9 of 12

If you thought the creation of an entire backstory for Bethany the Ballet Fairy was extreme please brace yourself further it’s gonna get EVEN BETTER

SPORTS FAIRIES

Helena

She do be riding horses doe - she’s doing the dressage babey and she’s a successful medal winner!

This is top quality shit man

Favourite part: sparkly boots!!!

Least favourite part: kill me the necklaces are back

Cute hairnet tho we love some safety!

Francesca

First braids! Whoop whoop! However some of the beads are not attached to her braids lmao

I want the hair to be a darker brown colour as well tbh

Necklace ew murder murder death death death

Shoes don’t match her outfit and it HURTS

Apart from that the outfit is basic but cute (crop makes it cute)

Pulls off the knee-high footie socks surprisingly well

HEADCANONS:

Dynamic attacker (not defender thank you very much), she kisses her girlfriend on the field, and she plays for brazil

Zoe

YESSSSSSS THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL DYNAMIC

Why is her left skate so fat has she broken + taped her ankle? This is canon now that she has, bitch has broken EVERY bone possible

The fingerless gloves are INCREDIBLE

I’m glad about the lack of elbow guards because they would reduce the pointiness of her elbows which are the single most effective murder weapon in fairyland

I love the stars! It’s so 80s and cheesy and I love them!

Why is her necklace a roller skate wheel though (rolls eyes)

Dyed hair?? A queen

A great red

She dyed it to match her skates!

COMMITTED TO HER SPORT also she has a trophy wall plus she roller-derby-murders women in her spare time and she’s happy about it

HEADCANONS:

Naomi - there is no netball in the united states (there is no war in ba sing se)

Can’t believe that this girl has bunches, ribbons AND a headband!!! It’s overkill imo

The necklace is a decent size but AS PER FUCKIN USUAL would be better if not there

Trainers are cute

It’s a netball outfit! At least it’s cuter than my high school netball outfits, but that’s because it’s a middle-class-ass netball outfit but I do like the peppiness

Strong use of colour! Thumbs up!

Trans girl that secretly wants to be a horse girl (gasp but like fair enough horses are objectively cooler than netball, even though she plays for the school team)

Hey you definitely Do Not Remember Bethany the Ballet Fairy’s chin shape but Naomi has the same one which means SHE IS BETHANY’S LITTLE SISTER

HEADCANONS:

Samantha (swimming)

The grey streaks are perplexing cos surely she’s not Old but honestly she is kinda rocking it, I love the hair but you Know it’s full of salt at all times

The use of goggles as a headband is decently cute!

Why does it have to be a two-piece if it’s going to cover the same amount of torso as a one-piece? I guess it makes going to the loo easy tho tbf

Very 2000s design omg

Fucking skirt could be cute but you can tell it feels so horribly artifical

Anklet is cute!

Barefoot QUEEN in tune with nature

Mum friend - she is the sunscreen queen, she has an straw beach bag entirely full of snacks, and she is so nice and chill   

She is not a professional swimmer AT ALL, she just goes to the swimming pool at the resort every year

Possibly the only straight fairy (experimented once with a girl but mainly likes men)

She knows breaststroke and doggy paddle and she thinks doggy paddle is a stroke

Everyone else is super fucking stressed out at the pool doing like actual lengths and exercise and Samantha is like do you want to come and do backflips with me in the deep end?

HEADCANONS:

Alice

The swirls are so cute! She definitely embroidered them herself

I want it to be a dress with a slightly higher waistline instead of a top with an overly long torso

Great job on a matching tennis racket that goes with your accessories - she painted it, DIY queen

Hair is BEAUTIFUL

Shoes are from the year 3000 omg so modernnnnn

The lil visor thing! Adorable! SO iconic

Alice is Naomi’s twin sister and Bethany’s younger sister, and she’s a massive girly girl. She’s the youngest child in the family, there’s not much pressure on her so she’s a chill kid. She’s cis and she’s a massive ally. Alice is absolutely the most likely out of everyone to go to the swimming pool with Samantha - Bethany never comes with her but 50% of the time Alice can get Naomi to come and hang out at the pool

Gemma

RHYTHMIC GYMNASTICS REPRESENTATION BABEY with the HOOPS and the RIBBON hell YEAH she definitely competes internationally

Outfit is bloody beautiful and it MATCHES HER HOOP

The yellow leggings are stupid but I like them

Her hair is in competition mode rn it is a good SOLID bun - the ribbon is for aesthetic only

Colour scheme showing support for Ukraine

Necklace is NOT gymnastics worthy full stop

[therapy-ghost]

Hi! Here's my information for our mega matchup exchange. Could I please get a romantic matchup for Resident Evil, DC, Marvel, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Helluva Boss, Hazbin Hotel, Pokemon (with a preference for Sun/Moon or Sword/Shield), and Genshin Impact?

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Straight

Age: 20

Zodiac Sign: Gemini

MBTI: INFJ-A

Ennegram: 5w6

Personality: I'm pretty quiet in social settings but if someone talks to me first, I can keep a conversation going. I will occasionally go up to someone to initial a conversation but not very often. With people that I'm close with, I'm very open and sarcastic. And I make a lot of self-depreciating jokes (even though I have a high self worth). I set very high standards for myself but I also usually meet those standards. People say I have a good poker face/a scary glare but I've never seen it. People also say I look like someone who "knows what they're doing".

Likes/Hobbies: Reading, writing, anime, video games, and listening to music (stuff like Hamilton, Panic! at the Disco and Offspring). I want to be a fantasy writer and I am currently studying an English major at university.

Dislikes: Spiders (deathly afraid of those), being forgotten when I'm gone, and disappointing those who I care about.

Looks: I'm 164cm (5'4") and have an average build (not too curvy but definitely not straight up and down). I have green eyes that everyone thinks are brown and curly/frizzy dark brown hair that is down to the middle of my back

I hope you have a lovely day and that life is treating you kindly! Looking forward to getting to work on your matchup as well!

~Eren

Resident Evil: Luis Sera

I love him to be honest(I dont like his remake design tho)

he 100 percent has a pokerface as well, he just has a bit of a hard time keeping it

also makes self depreciated jokes so you can easily have a joke off.

if you two are sitting on the couch and you both see a spider at the same time; he left an hour ago.

he's a hamilton viber; will rock out to the schuyler sisters with you and try and sing you'll be back like in the musical(Spit and all)

DC: Dick Grayson

supportive king right here

you wanna write a fantasy book? already bought! as sson as you start writng he is on the waitlist for one.

he's a bit of a diva; so if he has something to rant about, he play with your hair while you do whatever.

now, unlike Luis, he can deal with spiders for you; he is your knight in spandex armor.

he also will watch anime if you are watching it, just wants to spend time with you sice most of the time he is either working or... working.

Marvel: Bruce Banner

he is also kinda quiet in social settings so you two togetehr is just like your own little bubble.

you have a little corner dedicated to you in his lab for you to write or read or whatever when you come to visit him.

he will help you if you want help in your quest of high standards.

he has somehom gotten hulk not to try and kill you so... yay

JJBA part 5; Bruno

mom's are made to be supportive and thats what he is, he is a mom

he buys a copy of your book once it comes out for everyone.

he would never be disappointed in you; he is there for you always.

he enjoys simple small talk about how your day is going and what you have been up to.

if you need peace and quiet, consider everyone gone on a job.

Helluva Boss: Vortex

bro is chill

he is like 6’11” so you look short compaired to him lol.

music exchanging with each other, I feel like he will enjoy a bit of offspring.

if you need help with anything to achieve your goals, he’s the man.

he’s the extrovert for you so you don’t have to start up conversations and just jump in when you feel like it.

Hazbin Hotel: Lucifer

honestly… *shrug*

golden retriever x black cat but the golden retriever will bite you with out hesitation.

he’s described to be very silly and out going, so I guess the conversations with be fun.

Relates to King George a bit to much(being to head of hell in all his greatness)

treats you like a literal queen; what ever you feel like, videos games, books, movies; you name you have it in your hands in the next 20 seconds, and if you don’t want anything, that’s fine to.

Pokemon Sword and Shield; Raihan

using his internet following to advertise your book once it’s out.

matching bandanna’s for you too

he is probably one of the more extroverted people on this list so conversation jump started

uses you expert ability of dialect to make his post and literally anything seem better.

with his social following and the fact that he is with you; you will never be forgotten

Genshin Impact: Kaeya

This cheeky bastard will pick you up, he is a ‘tall male’ after all.

he is very sweet to you; every time he comes back from a mission with the other knights, his first course of action will to be hunt you down and give you a hug.

he is also quite sarcastic so… joke swat?

he likes to sit literally anywhere and read with you.

if you like to have your hair played with… so does he; so playing with hair is also something he does(it’s a blue character thing)

I really hope you enjoy this; and have a wonderful day/night!!!

[greypetrel]

!! for the hand in hand starters, how about ∆ HEAL ∆   -  sender treats a wound on the receiver’s hand

Hello! ✨

No character stated? Uh. Let’s do something new, shall we. And since last prompt was light and very fluff...

Also I honestly don’t know how but in my first DA2 play I triggered Anders’ romance by mistake. I was running after Isabela and suddenly Anders tried to kiss me and I was there bitch what. Of course I kept it.

Tis the prompt list

∆ HEAL ∆   -  sender treats a wound on the receiver’s hand

Raina staggered back, bumping her back against the wall -she didn’t want to know what exactly fell when she did, she just felt something splorch under her boot and she prayed it was a patch of snow that hadn’t melted yet. She had no heart to peek down and look, she was better without looking. She fixed on her adversary instead, raising up her fists against her face, spitting on the side as the last of the thugs got close by, blabbering something she didn’t even care to listen to. She was panting, her left thigh hurt if she put her weight on her leg, and as per usual, that spot on her left ribcage had a bruise as well, with two or three others around herself. None on her back, tho, of which she was proud.

So much for her grand return to the Hanged Man after Anders finally declared her stomach healed and her good to go out. He would have probably killed her for running head-first into a brawl after her second beer of the evening, but in the moment she couldn’t care less. Things were finally back to normal, she felt alive again, adrenaline rushing and keeping her active. And she hadn’t even needed to put that much effort in finding the fight. Or well, starting it, but those were details. She loved Kirkwall.

She waited in guard for the last thug to approach her – he was a tall and buff mercenary always so quick in whistling at her and Merrill whenever they came around the tavern, big words, apparently no neck and slow feet, not intelligent enough to guess that if she knocked out his three friends, chances were that she would have done the same with him as well. But oh no, he was the last in town to know exactly who killed the Arishok. Raina wasn’t complaining.

He stepped up, gained speed -as much as he could- and raised his fist, ready to punch her… And she ducked last minute, crouching and slipping just below his fist and leaving it colliding against the wall where her nose was before. How unfortunate. She didn’t lose time, and spun around at once. He just started screaming in pain that she hit him, slapping hard against his right ear to make him lose balance and kicking him in the kidney, from behind, hard with her knee, building momentum by spinning on herself.

He fell on the ground, and she punched his nose -she heard the crack of the bone breaking and ignored the sharp pain in her knuckles as they collided against the skull. He was on the ground, breathing hard and holding his nose with both hands, groaning loudly in gurgling noises, throat full of blood. Raina panted hard, spitting again somewhere and waiting for him to cross her eyes.

“Say one more comment to any girl and I’ll get back to finish the work. Got it, Casanova?”

She smiled at him, leaving clear that she wasn’t joking. He luckily got the message, and nodded, not trying to get up again. Luckily for her, because her hand was throbbing pretty painfully, and she was tired. Too much time in convalescence, and surely there wasn’t anything tugging in her stomach. Nothing at all, uh-uh.

She nodded once, declared it had been a pleasure talking of basic decency with them, and as the group of thugs was raising back from the ground and scampering away scared from her, she entered back the tavern.

Cheers and whistles welcomed her in, and in all answer she curtseyed, as graciously and elegantly as her mother tried to teach her ever since she was a child. She had listened, just refused to do it for the Chantry Mother in Lothering, driving her mother crazy and Garrett laughing under his hand.

Satisfied with herself and feeling a little less cranky than when she entered the tavern, she went straight for the counter, winking at Corff and asking him whatever hard liquor tasted less like piss he had.

She heard someone calling her from behind, but honestly? She didn’t want the company. Not this evening. This evening was for getting in the first fight on the way, no daggers, no weapons, just good old punches and kicks, and getting horribly drunk. She killed the fucking Arishok and suddenly everyone in Hightown liked her, the hypocrites, she had sex with one of her best friends on a whim and said best friend somehow didn’t hate her, was ok with the thing, just told her to settle things up with the other friend she really liked and had sex with and tell her what she decided. And who never came to check on her whilst she healed. Not when she was conscious at least, she’s been told the piratess has been there in the first night, after they got back from the palace. But then? Nothing.

And Raina Hawke was never good at talking about feelings. And feelings, with Bela, were very clearly out of the discussion. So, she would have done the sensible thing anyone in her fucked up position would do. Drown the feelings that shouldn’t be there in… It was clear, it could be whatever spirit brewed in a cellar in Darktown- and get on with her life. Decided what she wanted to do with her life.

Maybe the answer was on the bottom of that glass.

But when she drowned it, all in one gulp, there was none, just her throat burning hot, and her hand hurting really bad. Fantastic, the thugs had hard heads for real. She shook the offending appendage in the air, breathing out the too strong liquor and, finally, assessing the situation. Her knuckles were angry and red, and the blood was hers too, gushing out from a couple of bad cuts across the bones. Right when her fingers bent, and she bent them enough not to let the cut close. Fantastic.

She grunted, rubbing angrily her hand against her jacket -it was dirty anyway- and asking for another drink. Maybe it would have been the right one for an answer.

Isabela, tho, arrived before her drink, casually leaning her back against the counter, right beside her.

“What next, convincing Martin to lower his prices by gnawing at his ears?”

“You know me, I live to serve.”

“A difficult course of action. If Anders entered now and saw you like this, he’d tie you to the bed.”

“He wished.”

She snorted, mirthlessly. Feeling horrible right after for the sarcasm she used. She didn’t know if it was already cool joking on it, or it was too soon after he tried to kiss her and she had to tell him she wasn’t interested. In boys in general. Never been.

Her liquor arrived, giving her at least a distraction. Another shot right down her throat, all of a sudden. It hurt less than the first, her throat probably numbing. The silence felt forced and tense, and she was about to ask for maybe another couple of small drinks, when Bela stopped her, placing a hand on her elbow and pulling a little.

“Come on, Champion, let me see that hand.”

“What for.”

“We wouldn’t want Blondie to throw a fit because you’re undoing all his hard work.”

She laughed, but there was little joy in it, and she refused to look at her in the eyes, carefully looking at a random point on the other side of the room. Raina nodded and followed her, snaking through other adventors and usual faces to climb up the stairs, Isabela leading her to the room she inhabited. It wasn’t the first time, Raina knew what to expect. Few things scattered untidily around with little care, trinkets on surfaces of little value, just to sway thieves so uncareful to go stealing from her, just the bed neatly done.

And what she met was a tidy room, knick-knacks at their usual place, but no clothes, bad romance novels, papers and quills and tools around. An opened sack tossed in a corner, evidently full. So that was it. Raina tried to ignore the sting of knowing she was leaving, didn’t comment in the least to anything she saw. She just politely asked for permission to ender the Captain’s quarters, in a mock salute, and went to sit on the foot of the bed, perching on the border, when she was allowed in. She didn’t take off the jacket, but just focused on her boots as Bela retrieved from her sack the small lacquered box she kept her medicinal tools in. Because a girls must be ready for everything. And brought to the bed the bowl of water from the vanity, with a clean cloth.

She offered her hand when she asked, not saying anything but a nod of her head and letting her work, washing it thoroughly and disinfecting it with a pomade she had for the occasions. It stung, it really stung, and Raina hissed through her teeth, instinctively trying to retract her hand.

“For a person who gets in so many fights, your pain tolerance is incredibly low.” She giggles, and if Raina had wanted to hurt herself more, she could stop and consider that behind her words there was some affection. But, no.

“Why being predictable, after all. Predictability is boring.”

“Exactly, why.”

Silence fell again as Isabela carefully rubbed the pomade on her knuckles, fingers very delicate on hers and pressing a little on the meaty part of her hand, in a proper massage. It shouldn’t have been so intimate, none of them even closed the door. But they’d been there in other situations, none of them had involved luggages ready for departure, and there hadn’t been any “I almost died to save your life” part yet.  When she finished, Bela didn’t let go of the hand, taking it in both of hers and placing it on her lap. Raina didn’t turn to look and let her do, stubbornly silent.

“Listen. I’m… I wanted to thank you for what you did. All of it.”

“I should thank you for coming back.”

“Yeah, sure.” She snorted. “You could have done it without me. You and Aveline could have stormed the Keep on your own, add your brother in the mix and neither the ashes would have been left.”

“I… “ I didn’t care enough to do it. Weren’t it for you, I would have left the city to the Qunari. She can’t tell her anything of that sort, tho. “… I don’t think so.” Better. Less pining. Maybe.

She heard sighing from her right, some more fumbling in the box, before something leant on her knuckles. A rapid glance on the side showed clean bandages being wrapped around it. The discourse looked concluded, but if Bela was really leaving, she had to ask. She needed to ask.

“You never came to say hi, ever since the Keep.” There. She couldn’t look at her anymore. “Why so?”

The work on her hand stopped.

“I am sorry. I… I was busy.”

Oh. So it was that. Busy. Well, she could understand it. After all, they had stolen back a relic from a gang of bandits whose boss was still around and knew who did it. And she also had had to organise her journey. Of course. Raina couldn’t reply, too busy, herself, to suppress everything, every nasty, self-deprecating and uncomfortable feeling that was arising in her throat. She wished it was alcohol, but she didn’t drink enough. She swallowed it.

“Well, you missed Anders almost getting along with Fenris, and Merrill playing doctor. It was fun. And Wicked Grace on my bed all together in our nightwear. Nothing much, anyway, we could do it again.” A pause. “Well, not the Anders and Fenris not trying to jump at each other’s throat, that would be difficult to recreate.”

“Merrill told me.”

“About the pyjama party? Yes, that was fun, Garrett and her built a huge pillow fort, Beowoof destroyed running right at it. It was-”

“She told me about you. And her.”

“… Ah.”

She froze, not replying in the least. And what to tell her? Yeah she had been crying and she was cute and I fucked it up but maybe not so much.

“She’s a good one, Hawke she’ll… She’ll be good for you.”

It hurt, honestly. It hurt even more than that luggage ready for departure.

“What about…?”

“We had our fun together. But that was it. Fun, right?”

“Yeah…” No, it was not. Not for her. “It’s been fun.”

She didn’t sound convinced, not even to herself. But, whatever doubts she had is ignored, swept away in that pile of unsaid and unexpressed that’s raising so high this evening. And with that, Bela deemed the bandage done, and patted delicately the back of her hand, satisfied.

“There, good as new. And that’s it.”

“When are you leaving?”

“Tomorrow.”

“I see.”

“It’s… I can’t stay here, Hawke.”

“I understand.”

“Castillon’s men will look for me.”

“Of course.”

“And… I don’t want to drag you in. I already did too much damage to you.”

“I was the one to follow you and not Aveline.”

“It wasn’t Aveline you almost died in a one-on-one combat.”

And, Raina had no words to reply to that. She just slouched forward, propping her elbows on her thighs and crossing her fingers between them, observing with focus a larger crack between two of the planks of the pavement, following the nodes in the woods.

“I- Listen, I’m not good for you. Haven’t been from the start. We both know it. I told you I didn’t want feelings.”

“You did.”

“And, you found another person. It’s gonna be fine. Someone has to think of your own good, while you’re so busy thinking of everyone else’s…”

“It makes sense.”

She felt her eyes burning, and clenched her jaw, hard, not to cry. What had Merrill done to her, that she now cried at every given chance? So many years in carefully avoiding it and now, twice in a week? She hated Kirkwall.

A hand clenched on her shoulder -contracted to the limit shoulder, but the fingers managed to squeeze nonetheless.

“So, goodbye, Hawke. And thank you, really. For everything. I’ll… I’ll leave you here, take your time. It’s the least I can do.”

And with that, Isabela rose up, mattress swaying a little as her weight left it. One step, another, another one as the Captain reached the door, hinges squeaking-

“It doesn’t have to be one over the other.” Raina blurted out, unwillingly. She hated how desperate she looked. But she could care later. “I mean, if you two are ok… It works with both, for me. All three of us. If you’re ok.”

There, out in the open, the forbidden dream she couldn’t even admit with herself. Drooling out of her lips before she can even think about what she was saying. Her heart thumped so loud in her ears, nose pricked as the urge to cry got more and more urgent every second Isabela didn’t speak. But again, she suppressed tears for twenty years. She could resist some more, contracting her fingers on themselves until the knuckles still visible became white. And waiting.

“… Goodbye, Hawke. Thank you.”

And with that, the door closed behind Bela, and Raina was left to herself and her tears, bursting out suddenly and more violently than she would have expected. She didn’t care if she could be heard -the walls of that place were horribly thin- or of whatever. She just slipped to the ground, pressed her face between her thighs, and hugged her knees, crying and crying until she had no more to give.

By all means, all Isabela said made perfect, absolute sense. But this was Kirkwall, and this was her, and nothing in that city or in her life followed rules that made any sense. So, she just dragged herself to her feet, and marched right out of the tavern, straight to home.

There was alcohol that was more reliable, at home, for sure.

[mcu-vanity-blog]

GOTG 3 Review (done by the characters I care about)

Disclaimer: I didn't watch the Christmas special

Peter: Has a complete alcoholism arc in the first ten minutes for some reason? It's implied he's been drinking a lot since Endgame and then, like 15 minutes in, he says out loud "This wouldn't've happened if I hadn't been drinking" and then that's just the end of it? My brother in Christ, this movie is 2 and a half hours long, maybe cut that bit aye?

He is very much just another character in this entry. Most of his lines could easily be given to Mantis or Nebula and nothing would really change. Chris Pratt looks visibly unenthused to be here most of the time.

(New) Gamora: Honestly, could've been left out of the MCU entirely since her death in Infinity War. Zoe Saldana is the best part of every MCU film she's been in.

In this film though, she starts off with the Ravagers >> maybe learns that she's a slightly better person than she thought >> goes back to the Ravagers.

She's basically just sort of "also there" for the whole film, and is often just acting as a foil for Peter's arc (which, btw, is realising that this woman who looks like his dead girlfriend isn't actually his dead girlfriend; a fact he already knows).

Idk man, it's weird. I think Zoe just contractually had to be in this one?

Rocket: Is very much the main character of this film, but spends a good two-thirds of it asleep. You mainly see him in flashbacks where he's being abused/experimented on by the film's villain.

It's a very classic James Gunn thing I think; take a small and helpless guy and make the audience empathise with him because of how small and helpless he is. I guess it's not super nuanced in that way, but it's not necessarily an unenjoyable story for him.

It was weird that they decided to give us his origin in what is apparently the final entry of this trilogy though?

Like, "you've loved this character for 9 years now and this might be the last chance you get to see him and his friends all together again! How about we have sleep the entire time and, instead, explain exactly how he became who he was when you met him 5 movies ago!". It's kind of just silly (Dan Harmon articulates this idea really well here at 0:35-0:51).

Nebula: Gets more screen-time and characterization in this film, still not the most interesting character tho :/.

I also don't think that Karen Gillian can act :(. Would much rather have OG Gamora over her

Drax: Still just relegated to unfunny comic relief. His thing in the first movie was that his culture didn't have metaphors and he was a little careless/happy-go-lucky; he wasn't an idiot.

Ever since then? He has exclusively been an idiot.

Don't care, but feel sorry that Dave Bautista still has to play this role, even though he does very well in it <3

Groot: Again, hasn't been interesting since the first movie. He used to be this sort of mysterious, ancient, gentle giant type of character, but he's basically been just a type of sci-fi set dressing in all the movies since then.

I know James Gunn has said he's a brand new Groot from the one we see in that movie, but it's like... why? Compare the scenes of OG Groot to literally any scene of Gunn-written Groot and tell me which one is the more interesting character.

Adam Warlock: Surprisingly good. Unfortunately, he's that same James Gunn character of grown-up person with the mind of a child (think Killer Sharl in Suicide Squad), but it kinda works in this? I like that they let Will Poulter keep his accent and I look forward to seeing him written by more competent writers.

[lumyart]

man i love emma endlessly too i find them so smart and their face’s bone structure jfc and they’re also soso endearing (i love love love how awkward they are omg my most beloved baby 🥺) how can someone not love them??? but their own side of the fandom pushed me away from them :( and here for example it is sooo hard to go through their tag or rhaenyra’s without finding some shit featuring daemon and their disgusting piece of a relationship every two posts u.u i’m trying to keep them close to my heart tho and consume whatever of them i find here or on my own somewhere else but it is difficult because they did almost just theatre before hotd and … sigh idk if i could go to see their plays and stuff i would istg like every day until im broke bc they seem so good and i love theatre but :((( theatre is so ephemeral i so hope they have more audiovisual projects in the future bc like i said before i’m not watching a second of that hell of a show (i do watch their scenes tho them and olivia’s bc their talent?? ohh, stunning!!) anyway, the twoiaf fandom suck ass and i’m so sorry you all have to be part of it, although im grateful at the same time because that brought you all to this ship and omg you’re all so talented i get emotional 😢🤍

emma are so cool i love them so much, i can't wait to see their other projects as well<3 but yeah unfortunately i have to stick to the rhaenicent emma stans or to the rhaenicent tag to see them😭 same for milly :( i love seeing the two of them at award shows and i wish olivia and emily would come as well but i guess it's not happening :(

honestly it's teaching me to not use twitter as much so maybe some good will come out of this😭 i need to let go of that hell app

[footballandshit]

bestie i'd love to hear your thoughts of the $sg and me$$i drama

hi bestie!! it's honestly kinda messy...(pun not intended)

okay so lemme get this story straight - he went on a trip to saudi to fulfil his obligations as their tourism ambassador, but failed to obtain the permission to do so from the club. apparently the coaching staff instructions were that if they won the game against lorient, they would have monday and tuesday off, but they didn't, hence only tuesday off. so, messi was clearly absent from training, as he reportedly left to saudi like almost right after the lorient match. as a result, he was handed a two-week unpaid suspension from games and trainings.

and like to makes things worse, rumours are that he seems not interested to stay at psg and is already searching for options, as he will become a free agent in the summer. al-hilal has reportedly made an offer for messi, so this isn't looking too good rn. (and i'm not too sure if the qatar-saudi arabia reported 'beef' also played a part in all this)

is the long suspension necessary? i really have no comment, psg has not handed such a suspension before so idk why they want to do it rn - is it just to show that no player is bigger that the club or perhaps just to make him look bad while he's searching for a new club? also tryna see this from messi's pov, because like he has had to reschedule this trip many time because of his commitments in psg, so he decided to just go and get it done (and also maybe he didn't expect to lose the game?? haha) but yeah with all the transfer rumours going on at the same time, it just doesn't sit too right with many. but like is it wrong for him to be looking at other options rn tho? his contract is ending anyways, and he doesn't seem to want to stay at psg, so why are fans being so harsh?? let the man be lol? at this point, if a player wants to play for the money or for the club, it's really up to them tbh, like what are we to do anyways?

and now messi released an apology video for his actions, but like idk if that's gonna change anything 💀

the fan protests and all...idk man, idt i wanna comment on it haha, but it isn't really a nice thing to talk shit about your own players when they're still playing for your club?? i heard they wanted neymar out too? but like i think gathering in front of his house and insulting him is just a bit too much and disrespectful actually. (and now neymar was found liking a post that called psg a small club so 💀)

but like let's be real, psg also kinda signed them all in the first place for like pr benefits etc (and well they were the only club who could probably afford the wages and demands lol), so i'm not really surprised if players don't really feel like committing tbh. and then there are also rumours about some tensions and questions within the dressing room, especially with kylian's position and powers...

all in all, psg really need to sort their shit out if they wanna be taken seriosly as a club tbh. and as for messi, i honestly got nothing to say - he's probably leaving anyways so good for him i guess? won't be surprised if players slowly staart to leave. with all the psg drama and their recent performance...psg just doesn't spark joy anymore

(sorry for the long ramble sksk 💙)

[thatgirlkalani]

bye?

I'm at a point in my life where I'm in full blown self destruct mode my life is a series of unfortunate events and it Dosent seem to be getting any better I have no will to live but I'm scared to die..not really scared to do but scared to do it myself...every couple of weeks its something new and fuccin terrible its been like that since the car crash I literally can't catch a break I can't win and I'm so mf tired of it after all the shit I been thru I still care too much I still love too hard I still give too many fuccs and I don't know how to turn it off I Juss wanna be numb or not exist or some shit I'm always seeing the good in people when the human race is literally shit. I feel like everybody in my life currently doesn't fwm as much as I fw them and I'm over exerting and ppl don't actually like me and I know they don't care how I do I can tell by little things...not answering a text..a call. bluffing on a link...and I just sense energies ... I don't have friends that are like me and I haven't in years and the one I did have. I lost at no fault of my own all of my friendships and relationships go to shit anytime somebody makes me happy they leave or get taken or change but something always goes wrong I find somebody I actually care or want to care about and get traumatized by it I have horrible taste in men bc. I seem to only want the ones that are gonna ruin my life stress me out or could give two fuccs how I feel and its crazy because they seem to be the only ones I relate or feel close to then its alll down tf hill from there. Idk if my poor choices in men comes from wanting to get as far from people like my family or from my long ass list of SA history but either way its gone to shit all these niggas do is hurt the feelings that I barley have , disappoint me, not give a Fucc inconvenience me or all of the above....the hyper sexuality has calmed down for the time being but the hyper fixation has kicked in there's no in-between I'm either completely cool on everybody, hyper sexual because I need to be in control of my body or I'm hyper fixated... normally on somebody who could give two shits.. and can't find interest in anybody else which is where I'm currently at...and I have every reason to be obsessed with this man even tho I know I shouldn't but its too late bc I genuinely fwh again I know better but currently I'm stuck and at a point where I hate myself because I watch him want/give everybody a chance but me then I'm forced to hear about it but have to play it cool bc I Juss want to keep him in my life atp bc. I don't have much... I don't really know how to pinpoint where all my abandonment issues came from but at the same time I can point out specific situations that have added to them because everyone that I attach myself to leaves.. and or hurts tf out of me and its been happening since I was 14 friendships and relationships alike.....why I really Juss wanna disconnect from everybody and I do ever so often but I get lonely and I hate that I wish I didn't need anybody.. I wish a lot I wish I didn't hate myself..I wish I didn't give so many chances.. wish I didn't love people who don't love me bacc...wish I could go numb, wish I didn't have mommy and daddy issues mannn fml. the. mommy and daddy issues is a whole other story because they weren't abusive in anyway except emotionally and I don't think they meant it but I just can't get past it... its hard to show affection to them and shit of that nature I wish we were closer I wish we shared similar views I wish I was comfortable going to them but I don't..im the. blacc sheep of the family and even if they wont admit it they know and I feel it.. I'm honestly tired of existing tired of the panic attacks tired of the manic episodes tired of the abandonment issues tired or the attachment issues tired of it all I really don't wanna be here doing this atp I'm only living for my grandmas...and. I guess my parents idk bc I don't wanna be here but I don't wanna hurt them..but I feel like I have nothing and no one anyone I had anyone I related to anyone that was my..

[wiktorianala]

Ma yapping about a game I just finished if anyone would care (and probably at some point getting out of topic, so just starting to talk about other stuffs)\/

Ok, so I just finished dsaf3 "good ending" and... what the fuck. Just to make things straight I accually replayed it 2nd time now, because 1st time was few hours ago, in the morning with no sleep so my brain was almost turned off, so ending seemed, not really interesting, nor emotional, at least not as much as innternet maked it seem, so that's why I just replayed it from last save (I just woke up so brain working just finey) and OH MY GOD WHO LET THIS MAN COOK? Like I've gotta say, I thought that I was "crying" hard over "evil route" (because honestly it not really made me cry but rather left me sad as fuck and not knowing what to do with myself), but holy shit after this thing I genuelly was in front of screen crying like a little fuckin baby (and stil left not knowing what to do with myself). I don't really think any game ever made me cry this hard, nah I bet I could say any piece of media. Gosh even now I want to cry again. Anyway I honestly was suprised that part that mostly break me was not the after battle with henry on flipside, but rather, at the end just thos tumbstones and all. Maybe because it all just cumulated at the end, I dunno. Honestly it's surelly gotta be for me one of thos games, for which I wish I could erase my memory, just to expirience them once more for first time. Closest to this might be when I'll finally get out of phase for it, for a longer time, just to replay entire serie again. Gotta say that arter palying all mayor routes from all 3 games (+ quite a few smaller ones) this serie surelly jumps into "fave games" category, right under portal2 (which is hightest place a game for me can go, because srry, but I hold very nostalgic connection for portal, and even if I'll find a game that I'll like more, thare's just like, I dunno a part of me saying "nostalgia at first place" so I can do shit about it), and that means I really fckn enjoyed it, because for now my faves only had "tier one (AKA. portal2)", and "tier two" wich was rest of my fave games, and now it has tier one (still the same), tier two which now include dsaf and tier three which is rest of faves (and if someone's interested "how much games are then here rn in total", answear would be... lemme check, It's five games in total on my fave list or more like "tha ultimate fave ones", and it's not because I play not many games, but rather that I rarelly find games that strike me in the way that, I don't know how to put it into words. I guess I just rarelly find "that one" type of stuff). Wait... didn't I get off topic? Hard to say. Ok, so anyway I really enjoyed it despite all of the cryies that occured ( and by this I mean not only 3rd game but honestly entire franchise because on "good ending" in 2nd game I broke too, and on just as I said somewhere before on "evil route" in 3rd too (on first one not thought, but it doesn't make me like it less) ( but no matter what 3rd is surelly my fave out of all)). And when I'll put my mind together , I'll think about concept for fanart (just like with evil route, a fanart directly of an specific ending) and maybe in spare time will make some doodles ( I'll have to think about in which art style it'll be(or wich one will fit it the best)). I know- I know I tend to make quite a lot (at least for my standards) arts from dsaf, BUT IT'S MY CURRENT FIXATION SO, I'M SORRRRRY. I guess next game I'll be playing will be dialtown, but for that to happen i want it to get on sale (just, so I could buy base game with dlc in price of just base (I know it don't work that way but I don't care))Yeah so ummm, that's all? I guess yes. Just like last time I bet noones reading that(and I don't mind it, after all I'm the one who decides to don't add tags to any just txt type of post, just so it won't pop up at any random person page, god it would feel awkward, especially looking at the point that I'm just writing the way that I would talk to someone so "first thing that comes to mind get noted" so after some amount of time, stuffs that I write feel really stupid/cringey. Shit I'm off topic again) Anyway, Byee~*

[ityoboiantwon]

Rant Rant Rant

I be hating hanging out with my parents man, mostly just my dad tho. Like I love both of them and they’ve done so much for me but I can’t stand being around both of them at the same time. Like every time I drive over to my moms house to meet both of them, there’s always at least a 60% chance me and my dad will get in a argument that ruins the whole rest of our time hanging out. Like just today we all met up and we already started arguing at a red light because my dad was mad that this guy wasent turning right. I was all like it’s fine we’re not in a rush and he can wait for the next green even though that sucks but then he said “ive been driving longer than you’ve been alive” and bla bla. And he’s so quick to take a combative tone and he constantly looks for confrontation all the fucking time like he was getting ready to roll down his window and cus at the guy in front of us and it’s like why bro. He has such bad anger problems and I hate being around him when he’s angry because if you try to tell him anything he just lashes back at you and he wins every argument because not gonna lie he is a very intimidating bald black man. He is so quick to violence and hanging out with him just drains me. And I feel bad for my mom because she’s had to put up with this for so long. (They’re divorced and have been since I was little but they still hangout sometimes) We’ve both learned to just leave him alone when he’s angry which is not how it should be. We just sit back and take it.

I honestly don’t think the two of them should even hang out anymore. My moms been in AA for almost a year now and she’s trying to quit drinking but the last time the two of them hung out without me, my dad ended up letting her get some alcohol EVEN THO HE KNEW SHE WAS SOBER FOR LIKE A COUPLE MONTHS UP TO THAT POINT WHICH WAS REALLY GOOD FOR HER. Sorry for the all caps there. But ye he basically let her drink even though he knows she’s really trying to quit which is such a scumbag thing to do. Its not the first time he's done something like this either. That’s made me lose a lot of respect for him but I can’t tell him that or bring that up because he’ll definitely blow up at me and flip this all on me. Then he’ll play stupid and say “oh I didn’t know she couldn’t handle just a little alcohol” but it’s like nigga you literally married this woman dog, you know she shouldn’t even have a single fucking drop of liquor. He loves playing dumb and he can never never never admit when he’s wrong he’s alsways gotta be right and it’s so fucking stupid. That’s another way we’ll get into arguments because he’ll gaslight me about the most minuscule bullshit. 

I guess this really just turned into a rant about my dad, I just had to get this shit off my chest I don’t expect anyone to read this. I still love my father of course because he’s the hardest working person I know and he raised me the best he could. It’s just that I don’t think I really wanna see him that much anymore now that I’m an adult. But at the same time, he doesn’t really have a lot of friends and me and my mom are the only family he has now because he decided to ostracize himself from the rest of his family. And he has no plans of mending that relationship and he claims he doesn’t care about not seeing his mom and other family even though he brings them up A LOT out of the blue during conversations. I probably need to talk to a therapist or sum. My father definitely needs a therapist. But honestly, I feel like if he actually got a therapist it would just play out like any scene with Tony Soprano and his therapist. He would probably get nothing done.

Anyways go nuggets. 

[nogenderbee]

So...i played the new otome game love and deepspace and absolutely IN LOVE with this one guy like

THIS MAN RIGHT HERE STOLE MY HEART THE MOMENT I MET HIM (plus he prob loves me too like omg we're so alike except for the fact that he hate cats-)

AND THE SWEET THING IS in this game you could like make him decide what clothing he want to wear in the home screen so i like try it out so like two days ago i opened the game and was FLABBERGASTED BY THIS MAN LIKE??

HE WORE THIS OUTFIT RIGHT?? AND GUESS WHAT I'M WEARING THAT DAY

THIS OUTFIT LIKE THE WHITE DRESS SHIRT?? THE WHITE JEANS??? THE GLASSES?!?! ESPECIALLY THE GLASSES??? IS THIS MAN IS STALKING ME OR SOMETHING?? IT'S TERRIFYINGLY SWEET THAT WE MATCHES LIKE OMG???

I'm still loyal with my husband ayn but damn he do became my top 5 really fast

-🌹

Omg, he's actually looking so sweet! Tho I probably couldn't survive hate for cats cuz OMG KITTIES

But I feel like I'd honestly doe on spot if character would dress the same as me- Like that's cute and pretty interesting but my worries about covering cameras constantly would so increase ToT

But this still looks pretty fun! So don't worry, no one's accusing you of disloyalty to your husband haha

[zombies-aliens]

So how was my day today. Well I went to the gym at 5am but I got there at 6am and had friends waiting :/ so I felt bad for that. But they get along well so there's that, I know I probably didn't bother them since they had each other but I still don't wanna do that tomorrow. Oh yeah I'm going tomorrow btw. I should prob be sleeping rn but I have to write about my day first. Well I went to work later that same day 🙃 it wasn't so great, idk how the other two were awake and I took a nap...

You know what dude my day has been so weird at work. I really don't have it in me to talk atm. Nothing really bad happened, it was a pretty average day, but something was weird and maybe it was because I was so sleepy. But it wasn't just that my attitude and thoughts were bad :/ I had just bad thoughts today that my friends don't really like me, they're just pretending, shit like that. And you know, that really effects me and I think of scenarios of how id respond if something were to go wrong in the friendship. Which I hope doesn't. It was creating a tension in myself for no reason. But part of me feels like it's true. I hate being disliked by people I want to be friends with, but I'm scared to say that I want to be friends because get unsure about if they're really my friends or if I'm something else to them. And I'm the stupid one. That's not ideal for me obviously. My day wasn't so bad for what happened in the physical world but in my own private inner world. There was trouble in paradise today. I hope tomorrow is better. I hope they both like me. But I could go on about how they both known each other probably way longer than I have and I'm the new friend of the group so I'm kinda feeling like the outcast in a way ESPECIALLY AT THE GYM HOLY SHIT. And honestly that's what Kickstarted my bad attitude, it's bc even tho my friend is married with kids, her and the guy get along pretty damn well, even she called him baby at the end after a hug, and I didn't get a hug. So I felt kinda I guess cold. Like I get no love. I mean hey it's fine I try to remember I'm not entitled to anything. I probably said that in another post but yeah it's the same thing I try to remember that to humble myself and not act like a kid who didn't get to play and have fun but the others could. I felt like an outcast in all honesty. And she's still inclusive with me like she says hi and still said bye to me but idk man, and she even texted to see if I'm good to drive home, but I fucking hate how shit I felt seeing and hearing that. I just want that intimacy as well you know? I haven't had that in so many years. Physical intimacy, and it doesn't have to be sexual neither. It doesn't have to be with my married friend neither.. but is this the best it's gonna get for me? I'm just gonna be someone's third wheel all the time? It sorta pisses me off bc like I don't wanna see that shit it ruins my mood but they don't get why it does tho. It's cus I've been lonely for so fucking long. And that set off a reaction in me like holding a mirror to me and it's just me, or maybe a guy friend, but there's never a girl by my side I can call mine and she can call me hers. It's just. Me. I'm sad man. I'm actually getting sad now. I just want a girlfriend to feel the love everyone's feeling all the time. But not just any random girl of course. But yeah. That's been my life for a long time. It's depressing and lonely. I think what I like about having a girlfriend is that, im her favorite. She liked me so so much that we are a couple now and that's the proof. She chose me and I chose her. We both like each other and don't take it for granted. But with me and my friends it's just so cold and empty. We're friends but idk why. Just because we hang out in the same place for 8 hours? Like my friend I went to the rave with said he enjoys my company but dude... wdym? Name 2 conversations we've had that were good? You can't. Name a time where I made you laugh? You can't. Name a time where- man what's my last name man do you even know my birthday? I don't know his neither. Like why are we friends it's so shallow 😅 this shit isn't even funny to me. I'm just confused. It makes more sense with the girl, but not with him. He's a cool dude sure, but... idk. And I'm gonna see these two tomorrow. I don't get how I'm the only one that questions but I'm probably the only one experiencing this. Nah you wouldn't get it. Cause it's always just me isn't it.

[chellyfishing]

I FINISHED THE THING in-depth thoughts and full spoilers for a two decade-old game ahead, god this is so long

let’s get a few criticisms out of the way first cause i do have a few minor notes: va stuff. the voice for ada is not the same as in 2 remake and all due respect to the new actress the performance is just not as good. it would bother me for continuity reasons as well, but the va in 2 was white while this one is actually east asian, so i figure that’s why a recast was done, in which case, i get it. i just wish the performance had been as good. that feels so mean. it’s fine! it’s not bad! it’s just a bit flat especially in comparison to the other one, which was honestly kinda flawless.

more unforgivably, dc douglas does not play albert wesker in this. they should have paid him whatever he wanted. he is synonymous with the role. i’m offended. jail.

(as a slight tangent, it’s possible that it doesn’t bother me that matt mercer is no longer leon because i never played 4 classic or, lol, 6, but it’s not like i’ve ever played a game with wesker in it either. this is the same actor as in 2 remake, and i really like how he plays leon. like obviously matt would also deliver a great performance, he is goat and i would die for him, but this actor just really kinda nails him for me. he has so many sarcastic quips and action one-liners but he never delivers them in a way that feels cocky or smart-ass, which i think is SO key for what makes leon so likable. he’s just tired!! he doesn’t get paid enough for the things he has to deal with!!)

uhh, the pacing. didn’t love it. this game is LONG. i couldn’t find how long my first play of village was but google tells me it’s about a 9-10 hour game and that sounds about right. my final save in 4 remake was just under 17 hours. i do take my time in my first play of games, but that’s long for a resi! still, that in itself is a neutral quality, and it’ll obviously get shorter now that i know what i’m doing, but it’s so action-heavy that it feels a bit relentless at times, especially across the middle bit. like, 3 remake is also pretty action-heavy, but it’s a fraction as long and paced itself very well. it was just a lot sometimes and i think slow, quiet parts are so vital to maintaining the correct level of tension in a game like this. otherwise it just becomes a bit tiring.

there were a couple major points in the game where i feel like it didn’t do an amazing job of telling me what the hell i was supposed to be doing. i got stuck straight out the gate the very first time i got to the village square cause my dumb ass was running around thinking i needed to find an exit. the worst imo was when the regeneradors first appear tho. like, you read in a note about the scope, but then you can’t get the scope until you’ve activated TWO of them. so i’m shooting at them, hoping that sufficient firepower will take them down, but it’s basically impossible without the scope or perhaps the devil’s own luck. you pretty much just have to kite them until you can upgrade your keycard to get into the room with the scope. they also probably could have done a better job with the location of the wrench, or maybe i’m just an idiot, but i was running around for awhile trying to find the damn thing. yeah i read a creecher swallowed a tool and then i immediately forgot about it, what do you want from me! the worst part is there is literally a wrench sitting on a table in the room with the power switch but no, not THAT wrench, you need the OTHER wrench ONLY.

so obviously one major change from the original was that they wanted to eliminate the QTEs, but i feel like as a result a lot of things happened in cutscene. i don’t know if there’s a one-to-one correlation here but that would be my guess anyway. like it just seemed like they had cool action-y things they wanted to include but couldn’t actually turn them into real gameplay so they said fuck it, cutscene, so there were times i was sitting there like, man i wish i was doing that cool thing right now.

hmm, the villains were a bit of a miss for me. i wouldn’t count mr. x or nemesis as villain CHARACTERS (they’re a gameplay mechanic slash boss more than anything), or the birkins honestly, but 2 does have chief irons, and 3 has mikhail, both of whom i thought worked really well in their respective roles. and then obviously in 7 and 8 you have some absolutely iconic villains in the bakers and the lords. so i guess maybe i have a kind of high bar for this series. ramón is easily the best of the lot, extremely memorable design, spends a lot of time taunting you over loudspeaker like really who does that? and even with him i think this game is just so jam-packed with boss-level encounters that he doesn’t... how to explain. i mean first of all he’s not even introduced until kind of late into things, and he’s really only around for that one stretch, if you get me? for my thoughts on the character of krauser, see below, méndez is just wish mr. x, and saddler’s whatever. i feel like the monsters are more memorable than the characters, really, which i guess is fine.

partially related to the two points above and ultimately kind of a mixed opinion, but luis was done so dirty. i’m pretty sure i knew he was going to die, and even if i didn’t the challenge for finishing chapter 11 is called “adios, caballero,” so i mean? but like. a knife in the back? after all that? just one little knife in the back? shove an herb in this man’s mouth! i get it, gameplay and story segregation, but it just felt sooooo cheap and convenient. from a storytelling standpoint, the primary purpose seems to be to make you, the player, hate krauser, because like, you can tell me he’s important to leon but a two-second flash in the opening scenes don’t help me know him from adam. i dunno, surely there were better ways to have done this. that having been said, his final scene did make me genuinely so emotional. it should feel as cheap and emotionally manipulative as the knife in the back but for whatever reason it didn’t. still, you could have had him give that speech before the fatal would and then at least killed him with a knife to the HEAD. or even better, “i’ll hold krauser off, you have to go save ashley! take this key!” or something? and then as you’re running away you see him get knifed in the gut and then later krauser taunts you with his lighter and you get it back after you finally defeat him?? somebody should pay me for this. anyway if you can kill someone with a single knife to the back in a cutscene, then what is to stop you from doing that to anyone. all of it is “because the plot says so,” and sometimes you need a better reason than that if you want to tell the best story you can! (but then he’s just sitting there with his lighter and you have to leave him and then the island blows up and baaaaawwwww. justice for luis.)

okay but quick note: mike? absolutely ejected from the helicopter before it went down and radioed for pickup. he’s fine and you can’t tell me otherwise.

moving past my own personal bugbears, i’m going to state what is perhaps my most controversial, spicy hot take ever, but i really like ashley. (controversial, yes, but surprising? as the only member of the sherry birkin defense league--she’s 12, you ghouls--i think not.) i liked ashley a lot! i liked her design, i liked her performance. she honestly was such a good sport given all the trauma. no, she’s no elizabeth comstock or miles tails per hour, but you tell her to shut herself in a locker and she barely even expresses distaste. she was doing her best!! and she needed to scream “LEON!” because then i knew she was in trouble! i also really, really liked her relationship with leon. he was so kind to her, and she tried so hard to help them both get out alive despite being way out of her depth. it was very big brother/little sister and i’m so here for it. team ashley. i hope she’s living her best life.

important! i finally figured out why i’m not into leon/ada even tho they are both bisexual bait: leon is asexual but not aromantic, and ada is aromantic but not asexual. the chemistry is all contradictory. so like, i’m not sitting over here invested in them overcoming their differences or whatever. also, leon is a puppy and ada eats puppies for breakfast.

some of the action set pieces seem goofy on paper, like ah yes, we must escape on a high-speed water scooter as an entire island collapses and explodes all around us. and yet, they made it work. mine cart rides? worked. harpooning a monster fish as it dragged you frantically around a lake? worked! fighting two giants over idk what is that lava? you better believe it worked!!

(oh, and i absolutely shot the water and got et by the giant fish. i had to do it once. i recommend it. peak comedy.)

speaking of the two giants tho, i almost had an absolute breakdown when i got to that fight, because i was severely lacking in ordnance, and i had bought a damn rocket launcher but it was in storage and this is for whatever ungodly reason the one merchant who doesn’t have a typewriter what the ACTUAL fuck. reloading my last helpful save would have lost me forty-fifty minutes and some pretty tough battles. i thought there was no way i could do it! anyway it turned out to be incredibly easy, and i didn’t even notice the switch to drop them in the lava until after i’d beat one and done severe damage to the other so i was like might as well finish this by hand. i basically only used my pistol and luis. it was fine.

i also thought i was gonna be trapped forever outside the room with the two blind guys, so i googled for strategies (“two blind guys at once?!”) and like, obviously those bells are put there to create distractions, but i was so focused on trying to use the cultists as bait that i hadn’t even tried them, and it turns out using the bell will actually stun the big guys when they run into it. so i circled around to get into position, hit the bell, both of them crashed into it, i started unloading my magnum into their backs, they were dead in seconds. didn’t even need a full clip. again, easy.

i know i complained about krauser above but really his boss fight is so unique. like, i struggled at first because he’s mr. don’t-bring-a-gun-to-a-knife-fight, so i was like, best not waste my ammo, i bet he’ll just parry or dodge all my shots, so i was trying to fight knife-only, and i used up my healing items and my armor was already busted after that first bit, and i’m like, clearly i’m doing something wrong. anyway once i mixed guns into it, it got a lot more doable and i could appreciate it a lot better. it’s grueling and man when he’d pop up and go SLOPPY! and pin you, that was bogus, but the whole thing just felt really different and neat. when i finally got to the last stage and he Revealed His True Form, i thought, oh good, finally, a straight-up boss fight, and then he’s still so quick and has multiple one-hit kills?? that chapter was the only one where my hit percentage was below 70 and i don’t even care because it doesn’t count. anyway, should have been more annoying than it was tho my zeal for it is somewhat mitigated by him having some cheap-ass moves, but still. i appreciate it a lot.

speaking of knives, i know at least non-diegetically it doesn’t work because you break and lose knives in resi2 remake but i like to pretend the combat knife you start with is, in fact, the one marvin gave you at the station.

as i said i take my time on first plays of any game, so i don’t care about rank, but when i got a B i was like oh! i must have done pretty well even so! anyway it turns out there is no C rank in this game.

oh, it probably goes without saying, but the sound design is, as always, perfection. if these people don’t have awards, they should, and if they do, give them more.

graphics are really good. one thing i’ve found even in games that have good graphics is that if you move your camera so that leaves or grass are right in front of it they look really bad because obviously those assets aren’t meant to be seen or examined up close, but in this game they actually still look good! it passed the leaf test.

i feel like i complained more than talked about the things i liked but i mean that’s always easier isn’t it? overall, just so so good. non-villain characters, performances, production quality, gameplay, variety of encounters, all so good. i don’t know where it ranks compared to the others i’ve played, but honestly i’m not sure i know how to rank those in comparison to each other either.

i’m sure i could say a lot more and i’ll remember twenty things i wanted to after i hit post but this is already a lot. i’m so pleased! happy birthday to me!! thanks capcom!