#honestly i was just like. let me make these three icons out of this scene. eh

[ofashesandthorns]

please please please don't bring me to tears when i just did my make up so nice~!

[mascdestr0yer]

BE CAREFUL

spiderwoman!paige x fem!reader

Warnings: overuse of italics, fluff, angst, slight cursing ?

Synopsis: paige got a lil hurt..

A/N: this is placed in ny city, for obvious reasons, it’s based off of the iconic scene we all know and love, if you don’t know the scene, well..

PAIGE LAID IN YOUR BED, watching you as you studied hour after hour.

“you can’t invite me over and just study, that’s very rude,” She began stretching, then she walked over to your desk, closing your book, grabbing your calculator.

“paige!—“ you huffed, not too upset, you had been ignoring the girl. “i didn’t invite you, you came over by yourself.”

“Literally the same thing— do you treat all your guests like this?” she shakes her head with faux disappointment. “Come on, let’s watch a movie, i know you want to,” she smirked, gently pulling you to your bed.

“maybe a little..”

“atta girl, come on,” she patted the spot next her.

The two were halfway through some romcom movie, “my mom is having her new boyfriend over and he’s going to be spending some nights over here more often, so i was wondering if we could hang out at your place instead..?”

“yeah, sure, i thought you like your mom’s new boyfriend?” she questions, fiddling her zipper on her jacket.

“i do—but, i just want to hangout with no interruptions and he’s so pushy.” your voice was soft, paige could tell you weren’t trying to sound rude.

She let out a chuckle in return,“excuses excuses..”

“i mean, if wanna meet him that’s fine by me.”

“i’d love too,” her smirk was too wide for you liking.

“why do you look like that..?”

“like what? this is my face, it’s awfully rude to judge someone off things they can’t change, especially, if they saved your life,” Of course she had to use the save your life.

“okay spider-girl,” you rolled your eyes, closing your laptop.

“first off, it’s spiderwoman to you, secondly i was watching that.”

It’s been a couple days without seeing each other, school would usually be the time you guys had at least some time together but, unfortunately it was spring break.

You both were busy so it was understandable, so here you were typing away trying to finish you Ap lit paper before break was over, you’ve been procrastinating all month.

Now as the due date nears the paper is all you can think about. Your laptop feels like it could explode from how long it’s been on.

you hear a soft but, loud enough knock at your window, “come in.”

You get out of your seat, walking over to her, “you know, when i said you can come over whenever i didn’t mean through my window, my mom would kill me,”

she chuckled and stumbled out of the window, she had three long claw marks on her back, “paige, what—what happened?”

“you should see the other guy..” she joked as you sat her down, “—the other guy… in this instance being a giant mutant lizard,”

“Hey, y/n, do you wanna have rice Krispy treats? your mom’s making rice Krispy treats,” you could hear your mom’s boyfriend, edwin, say down the hall. that makes you jump up and rush to your door. paige quickly gets out of your chair to hide.

you opened the door, out of breath, “no, edwin, i do not want rice Krispy treats , honestly—i’m seventeen years old,” you say way harsher than you’d like.

“well, i just thought i remembered someone saying last week that her fantasy was to live in a marshmallow house,” Edwin raised a brow, he decided not to question the other of breath situation.

“well, that’s impractical,” you closed your door and then reopened it, “and fatning,” you closed you door again.

you looked at paige who was sat ln the floor behind you chair, “marshmallow house,” she teased, you just rolled your eyes.

you reopened your door, “m’sorry edwin, i just can’t have rice Krispy treats right now, i’m—i’m working on this paper and like it’s due soon so, you don’t even wanna know.”

He just nods his and walks away, you sighed.

the taller girl winced as cleaned her wound, throwing her head back slightly.

“his—his tail was like humongous..” she started, you grimaced at the sight of her trembling body.

“shh.. it’s okay,” you cooed, you tried to bandage the girl quickly but, tight enough so it wouldn’t hurt her. when you were finished the two of you laid on your bed, you gently combed your fingers through her hair.

“thank you..” it muffled by your shirt that she had her face buried in.

“you’re welcome, just be more careful next time.. you know i’m not always gonna be here,” you responded softly.

“you’re not allowed to talk like that,” her grip on your shirt tightened.

“okay okay..” you chuckled.

“it’s not funny,”

sorry if it’s too short, hope you guys liked it, taglist: @aerinaga @danc1ngqu33n @darlindayss @secretlifeofmarii @aavasstuff @h34rtsformilli @ajcuteee @naipoohh @theendofevangelionnn @mrsengstler @thebignunfun @tired-duckling @julienbakerloverr @mrsarnold @slut4uconnwbb @abbyswif3 @svudetective @liviiyyy @hellokittyfeenie @paigeslanyard @latenighttalkinqwp @ashortyluvsports @kittykatz1227 @seraphicgrll @paulamdm @patscorner @addil244 @1-800-fantasy @typicalkith

[lilycolbertsstuff]

Ok let’s talk all things Bridgerton.

First things first, we’ve all binged it the day that it came out, right?

Second, Nicola Coughlan the woman that you are.

Now let’s move on to the serious stuff.

I have to say that so far I’m liking this season but there are some things that I really don’t understand, namely all the subplots. Some of them should’ve either been cut or they should’ve had less screen time. I understand for example the introduction of Francesca and John because of how their story plays out in the future but what about the Mondriches? Don’t get me wrong I like their characters and their chemistry but I really don’t get why they’re such a prominent part of this season, hopefully their presence will be justified in part 2 for it would be heartbreaking to see unnecessary hate towards them.

Another aspect I liked is Eloise and Cressida’s friendship. In the beginning I didn’t think it would be something genuine but turns out that El does actually come to care for Cressida, who is finally not just relegated to being the mean girl.

Kate and Anthony are a dream to watch on screen, their chemistry is out of this world and they most definitely deserve the long ass honeymoon for god knows how hard these two have worked for their families.

I found Francesca to be such an interesting character and her and John were cute but the side couple that I’m really curious about is Violet and lady Danbury’s brother.

The Featheringtons were a highlight of this season to me. They had no business being this funny. Every time a scene with them came on I was prepared to laugh.

Queen Charlotte and lady Danbury are such icons you can’t help but love them.

Last but not least, Benedict. My boy what have they done to you? It’s so painfully obvious that they didn’t know what to do with his character because give me a valid reason why his storyline this time around is him going to bed with a widow; I would’ve much rather liked to see him in those artists’ parties or whatever like he did in season one and maybe explore more of that aspect of his personality in preparation for his own season, which hopefully will be next.

Time to talk about the leads:

I wish we could’ve seen more of Colin’s identity crisis but I feel like whenever the script was lacking Luke did a great job compensating with his body language and facial expressions. Also can we all agree that he’s just so whipped for Pen after their first kiss?

As a fellow wallflower I really related to the scenes where Penelope felt frustrated with the ton and all the socialising. I can confirm that even when we get all dolled up and feel confident in our own skin for once it’s still so hard to put ourselves out there. We feel called by the wall and somehow we find it more fascinating to observe all the different dynamics going on around us rather than actively taking part in them, even if sometimes we want to.

The scenes where Pen threw herself on her bed and sighed? Yep, I felt that.

I honestly didn’t mind that Colin and Pen got together by the end of the first part of the season for we’ve been watching the build up to their relationship for three seasons now. These two have been friends for ages so it’s not like they had to go through all that getting to know each other phase. Furthermore, I’m pretty sure that part 2 will focus on the unfolding of the lady whistledown storyline and having Colin and Pen be together makes more sense because now he loves and wants to marry her leading to an even more crushing reveal.

The carriage scene?! I died and resurrected in the span of like 3 minutes, and that’s just their first intimate scene I don’t know what will happen to me with the ones to come.

These were my overall thoughts on Bridgerton season 3. I can’t wait till part 2 comes out but also I will be deep in exam season so it’ll be a wild ride, let’s hope everything turns out for the best.🐝🩵

[ambrosiagourmet]

I notice no one has asked yet so for the character thing: laios! Or if you want to go for a less common one: the winged lion

Laios!!!!!!

First impression

Honestly its hard to even limit this within the confines of starting the actual manga. I genuinely think I'd have to say my real first impression of Laios was the "autism be damned, my boy can work a grill" joke that gets passed around a lot 😭

Impression now

Older brother.

Loves his friends and family so much. Let him infodump!!!!! A guy that can character arc so hard he becomes a king because its the only way to deal with the things he can no longer let himself look away from. A guy who wants to eat a good meal. A guy who wants everyone to eat a good meal.

A guy who can be all that and still kind of pettily complain that he doesn't get to hang out with monsters anymore & can mope about it soooo annoyingly. A guy who decided to eat the concept of all-consuming hunger because it was the only way to deal with the problem so he might as well try. A guy who can completely change his life by deciding to share his special interest. A guy who can imitate a dog really well.

Favorite moment

Don't make me choooose... okay I'm gonna do three:

1. Assembling Falin's bones with Marcille

The humor. The patience. The slow realization that, despite how absurd of a task it is, it is actually all possible. The moments of admiration for the way skeletons work, the love of the details, the care of assembling all three skeletons just to make sure they get Falin right. Iconic scene.

2. Killing Falin

"Unable to make myself accept. Unable to make myself resist" lives in my soul now idk what else to say. Life is so vibrant and horrifying and raw and beautiful and to let yourself fully be a part of it you must take up space. You must consume. You must fight. You must take and be taken from. Ourgh

3. Talking Marcille down

I love that he looks so goofy on his way up to her. I love the context of how much he refuses to give up on her leading up to this, and how he refuses to give up on her now. I love how everyone is part of this scene, but he's the first one to cross the threshold. I love how she almost blows him up but can't do it (fun fact: this exact situation/post was how she killed Mithrun a couple of chapters ago. It was close).

I love the way he appeals to her mostly just with messy honesty, and I love the silly three rules callback. It's such a sweet chapter.

Also honorary mention for the final page of the story, which gets me every time.

Idea for a story

I'm actually currently fiddling with a longer story concept dealing with the question of Laios needing an heir. Dungeon Meshi is grounded enough in politics that it genuinely feels like a question that the characters will have to grapple with at some point. At the same time, there's no way that like arranged marriage and even having kids in general are not messy topics for Laios and I don't think anyone involved would want to force him to be miserable.

(I also don't personally like the idea of Falin as his heir ftr, bc I think forcing Falin into that role sucks and I don't think anyone would go for it)

So how DO they deal with the issue? Idk! I might write a long meandering story about it! Maybe! I want to, at least.

Unpopular opinion

Ughhhh I don't realllly want to poke this with a stick but yeah I definitely think my most generic (apparently????) Unpopular Opinion with Laios is just that his relationship with Marcille is meaningful and loving. I personally don't view it as romantic and they mean a lot to me as a platonic-life-partners kind of thing, but I also think that dividing relationships in general into Ships TM and Definitely Not Ships isn't really appealing to me personally. I just care them.

(at the same time I really do worry about trying to write about them and it being taken as romantic despite me very intentionally not framing it as such. idk, navigating this stuff is complicated.)

Favorite relationship

UGHHHH LIKE. It is probably him and Marcille. But it's so hard to rank that against him and Falin. Both relationships mean a lot to me and I love them and I love to think about them.

Because him and Marcille have more on the page interactions to dig into and because I don't see them discussed as much, I do tend to gravitate to Marcille & Laios stuff above all else. But like.... don't make me actually commit to picking.

Favorite headcanon

I can't think of a strong answer for this so I'm going to make one up on the spot: I think he giggled to himself soooo much when he included the winged lion in his king outfit but made it so that it looks like the wolf head is eating it. I think he continues to giggle about it years later. I think he gets dressed in the morning and puts on his cloak and goes "get ate, idiot" as he fastens it around his shoulders.

Oh actually for a more genuine headcanon related to the story thing I mentioned above: I think Laios is really good with kids but would be scared of having any of his own. I think he'd have trouble with the classic "I don't want to mess them up the way my dad messed me up" abused kid struggle.

[whenthegoldrays]

TOP TEN EUNEUN MOMENTS (according to me)

10. Festival scene

The perfection of this scene, Eun Gyeol at his down-baddest and Eun Yoo putting on a brave face while literally going through some of the most distressing moments of her life, and their being kept apart by the (very understandable) misunderstanding and just. wanting to reach out and be comforted but staying behind those barriers. Chef’s kiss.

9. “Tears in Heaven”

The significance of his singing to her, singing this song specifically because it’s part of the connection they share and don’t realize yet, plus the lyrics being so peculiarly perfect for their situation. And the tenderness in his eyes! (This scene is also enhanced by Eun Gyeol’s later conversation with Mr. Choi.)

8. “You’ll be born just fine”

A tiny moment but so perfect because not only does it show off Eun Yoo’s slightly unhinged sense of humor, it’s also a perfect establishment that they are, in fact, on the same page now. And their facial expressions absolutely sell it.

7. “Under one condition”

This is technically a moment between Eun Gyeol and Yichan, but the fact that Eun Gyeol told Eun Yoo he hated her all of three minutes ago and is now publicly declaring his love for her in front of the whole school (and exposing himself to everyone’s anger in response) is simply too iconic and hilarious and to me, wraps up the essence of the show’s character dynamics flawlessly.

6. “Ajumma???”

Their delivery lives rent free in my head, and they just. hate each other so much right here. Kind of a delight.

5. Once more around the block

Am I overly attached to this scene because of the soundtrack playing over it? Maybe. But the way he cares!!! They’ve had the most emotionally and physically exhausting day and then they get this moment to calm down, for Eun Yoo to lie her head on his shoulder and for him to let her rest undisturbed for a few extra minutes. And!! she goes along with it, because she likes his nearness.

4. “You have three seconds”

The layers and layers to this scene. Both of them pushing their own agenda, both of them wary of the other, both of them YAPPING. The way Eun Gyeol goes from oblivious to apologetic to scared for his life to flustered to baffled in the span of like 45 seconds. And the chemistry is chemistry-ing.

3. “That’s the real me!”

My deep and abiding love for this exchange. Eun Yoo calling back to the pool scene and possibly expecting another fake answer, and Eun Gyeol answering her immediately. He doesn’t have to think up an answer anymore, he knows when he started liking her, he knows why and how, and the truth — that he likes her for her, not for her assumed identity — is so blindingly beautiful to her that she can only shout for joy.

2. “I’ll take my time figuring it out”

Obsessed with everything about this scene, from the callback to the last lightning storm, to Eun Gyeol’s promise to both help Eun Yoo get home and also make sure to draw out their time together as long as possible, to the tension. The longing. And the way the scene is structured around what you’d expect to be the most important part — but instead it draws a curtain of privacy around that moment and leaves the emphasis on his promise and how important and heart-fluttering it is to her. Add to that the beautiful OST and Eun Gyeol dancing down the street in joy and you’ve got a perfect scene to feed my mental illness.

1. “Let’s just stay together”

You knew it was coming. I love few things in this world more than a romantic rain scene, and this one deserves the world for so many reasons. The bigness of their emotions leading up to this moment — her whole plan and perception of her past has been shattered, and she runs away in distress, and he runs after her! He runs through the airport in desperation, he can’t lose her. They’ve been yelling and fighting and sobbing and everything feels like so much, but when he finds her everything slows down, everything can be still and he can just speak honestly. He wants to stay with her. The objections don’t matter. What matters is he wants to be by her side. He wants to shield her from the storm. And she takes his hand and stands up again and suddenly everything is a little less bleak, a little bit warmer. Plus Master watching them in satisfaction that they’ve found their helper? CHILLS.

[shiki-aki]

“You told me to go wherever I like, but I want to be with you until the end.”

A Shikiaki Meta

Part Two: Shiki and Akira’s Encounters (I)

A sharp burst of wind; the flash of naked steel.

[Previous] Part One: Akira's Characterization

This is part two of the meta where we’ll finally get to analyzing Shiki and Akira’s initial encounters. I ended up splitting this part in half because it was getting too long, so part three of the meta will be a direct continuation of part two.

Just as a heads up, I’m going to be rambling a lot more going forward because there’s just so much I love about every single Shikiaki interaction that it’s difficult for me to organize my thoughts and lay them out in a concise manner, but I'll try. Also, I’ll probably gush over Shiki a lot, but I’ll keep it to a minimum (no I won’t lol).

The reason why I’m not ordering anything into sections but rather just analyzing each scene as they come up is because I feel like there are just so many intertwining layers when it comes to the Shikiaki dynamic, that it’s hard to talk about one aspect of their relationship without inevitably straying into another. Going through every single scene in Shiki’s route and breaking down exactly what happens in them, along with my interpretation/analysis of each scene, is, frankly, the easiest way for me to go about writing this meta, so that’s how I’m going to do it.

We pick up where we left off with Akira going into the alley even though he sees all these people running. This act in particular hints to Akira’s fearlessness, which is a character trait that’s expanded more upon later in Shiki’s route. Logically, what Akira should do is go back into the hotel and ask Rin or Motomi who Shiki is and why everyone’s running away from him. Instead, he lets his curiosity get the better of him and decides to go see who Shiki is for himself, because Akira can’t help but be intrigued by the fact that there’s someone who is so strong and powerful that his mere name and presence would inspire fear into others.

In the alley, he senses a deadly presence and can tell this person isn’t some “common thug” like those other Igra fighters. He sees the blood, the dead bodies, and then the man responsible for the massacre, and Akira instantly deduces that this man is Shiki—the guy everyone is running away from.

Honestly, I just love the tension and buildup to the moment that Akira actually sees Shiki. He can immediately sense what makes Shiki so different from everyone else.

Then we finally see Shiki in this iconic CG, and this is the first line of text that accompanies it:

—Crimson eyes, redder than blood.

I'm calling attention to this line because it tells us the very first thing that Akira notices about Shiki: his eyes.

Eyes are a recurring motif in Shiki’s route. There are several, and I mean several instances in Shiki's route where the text mentions Shiki's eyes. The game makes a point of drawing attention to Shiki's eyes, and since the game takes place from Akira's POV, it's Akira himself who is noticing Shiki's eyes each time this is happening.

From a writing standpoint, it doesn't make sense to point out Shiki's eyes or the color of his eyes so much because in real life, we rarely take notice of people's eye color. Like really, truly think about how often you take notice of people's eyes when talking to them instead of just paying attention to their body language or the words they're saying. It wouldn't make sense for Akira to notice or mention Shiki's eyes in his POV so much… unless there was a deeper meaning behind it.

In Shiki's route, the motif of eyes is repeated throughout the story as a way of highlighting and reinforcing the character dynamic between Shiki and Akira. It's not about their eyes in a literal sense, but about the figurative meanings/ideas conveyed through the motif. When Akira looks into Shiki's eyes, he's seeing and acknowledging Shiki's confidence and strength, his domineering attitude, and his single-minded ambition. When Shiki looks into Akira's eyes, he's seeing and acknowledging Akira's fearlessness, his indomitable spirit, and his strong will.

Simply put, the act of gazing into each other's eyes is about Shiki and Akira acknowledging (and more implicitly, respecting) the character traits that the other has. And it’s this recognition and understanding of each other's psyches that shape their overall dynamic and interactions. Shiki’s overbearing confidence and domineering attitude is what pushes Akira to act more stubborn and prideful, and in turn, Akira’s indomitable disposition is what pushes Shiki into acting more aggressive and forceful with him. It's this back-and-forth struggle between them that makes their individual characterizations shine, because we see how their characterizations continuously grow and develop in response to the other's actions and behaviors.

Their interactions are driven by how constantly at odds they are with each other, and this opposition between them is what leads to their eventual character growths. The more Shiki demands Akira to submit, the more Akira develops a resolve to stay true to himself and follow his own will. And the more Akira refuses to give in, the more Shiki comes to respect him and see how strength can manifest in ways other than physical prowess, and apply that principle to himself.

The recurring act of them gazing into each other's eyes throughout the narrative also doubles as a way of adding tension to their dynamic because let's be real: the way Shiki and Akira look at each other is extremely intense and sexually charged. In fact, the manga does an excellent job at showing the chemistry between their gazes, since it's a more visual medium than textual.

The gist of my point is: a lot of Shiki and Akira’s interactions in the game (and manga) involve them eye fucking each other, and it's narratively important to their dynamic that they do so. It adds sexual tension to their interactions, but it also gives us insight to their characterizations and how they perceive each other.

When Akira and Shiki finally engage in battle, Akira focuses on the weight of Shiki’s sword against his knife. That’s his initial reaction. But then his focus shifts to Shiki’s gaze on him, and while he can’t interpret any emotion from Shiki’s expression, he can identify the bloodlust in Shiki’s eyes. This is already the first instance of Akira being able to gauge something about Shiki's behavior just by looking into his eyes.

Akira’s impression of Shiki is that he looks “like a mannequin,” which is a bit of a strange descriptor to use, but it’s a deliberate choice of words here because this isn’t the only time in the game in which Shiki is likened to a doll. My interpretation of this is that Akira is perceiving Shiki’s strength, demeanor, and appearance as inhuman during this moment because Shiki is leagues beyond anyone he’s ever met, and there's just something about him that makes him stand out from the rest.

And this idea of not being human is an image that Shiki himself very carefully cultivates. He actively tries to cast away his humanity (emotions) in order to achieve what he perceives to be ultimate strength. After all, the only one who was strong enough to make him feel fear for the first time in his life was an emotionless "weapon," so Shiki tries to discard his emotions in pursuit of that same strength, believing emotions to be a source of weakness for him.

Hence why the text describes Shiki's face as "pallid and expressionless" during this scene and likens him to a mannequin. A mannequin/doll doesn't experience emotions, and it doesn't suffer the same flaws a human would when it comes to feeling exhaustion or hesitation or any other limitations in battle. Basically, Shiki wants to be like Nano, because although he'll never admit it out loud, he knows that Nano is stronger than him.

To top it all off, the soundtrack that plays whenever Shiki shows up in the game is called "Invincible," which further demonstrates how he wants to be above his humanity so he can prove (and reaffirm) his strength. The only ironic thing about all this is that he ends up developing an emotional attachment to Akira and feeling affection for him by the end of his route, and this meta is all about exploring how Shiki gets to that point.

It's not a coincidence that the choice selection for Shiki's route involves Shiki and Akira looking directly into each other's eyes. This is what I mean when I say their interactions are about them eye fucking each other. It really could not get any more explicit about how their dynamic revolves around them meeting each other’s gazes and acknowledging each other's core traits and strengths through that act.

This is the defining moment that determines whether you'll end up on Shiki's route or not. If Akira chooses to look away, you won't end up on Shiki's route because Shiki will perceive Akira as weak and disregard him. But if Akira chooses to hold his gaze, then the game will continue on Shiki's route because Shiki will recognize Akira's backbone and consider him to be different from the other fighters who usually avert their gaze out of fear.

The choice is a test of Akira's strength—not physical, but mental. It's already clear that Shiki overpowers Akira in terms of physical strength, but Akira's mental resilience is what makes Shiki interested in him following this exchange.

This moment tells us just as much info about Shiki's characterization as it does for Akira's. Shiki will only acknowledge those who are brave enough to face him head on, and Akira is exactly that type of headstrong person who won't let himself succumb to his own fears and doubts in battle.

I’m including the manga version of the same scene here because it conveys the tension of this moment extremely well, and also because I love Chayamachi Suguro’s artstyle. Mostly because I love Chayamachi Suguro’s artstyle.

The panels are formatted in a way that makes it clear the focus is on Shiki’s and Akira’s gazes, which ties back in with the motif of eyes I discussed before.

Akira recognizes that this isn't just a battle of strength between them, but also a battle of wills. He knows that looking away first would be akin to admitting defeat, but Akira is not the type of person to just roll over and give up easily. His perseverance is what enabled him to survive thus far in the first place.

Shiki calls Akira a "weakling," which pisses Akira off because it's obvious trash talk, but on some level, he knows Shiki is right.

And from Shiki's POV, he does view Akira as weak and beneath him, but he also recognizes that Akira is different from the other fighters. Instead of running away, Akira chose to fight him head on—and that's Akira's own form of strength that Shiki subconsciously acknowledges. If Shiki really did view Akira as a weakling who wasn't worth his time (or had any worth being alive at all), he would've continued his attack and killed Akira right there, but he didn't. Instead he backed off and walked away.

Even though Shiki is the one to back off first, it's clear that Akira is the loser in the fight. Akira understands this; he understands the disparity between him and Shiki in terms of strength. Shiki also knows he's made it clear just how weak Akira is compared to him, which is why it isn't an admission of defeat when he walks away first, but a power move. He knows Akira can't do anything to him.

Honestly, I love Akira's reaction after this near-death encounter with Shiki. He's aware of how easily he could've died in this fight, and yet he feels… elation/euphoria following this experience. This isn't like the fight with Takeru where it could've gone either way because they're evenly matched. Akira was 100% dead here if Shiki actually intended to kill him.

Akira's initial reaction isn't even to feel upset that he lost, but to bask in the excitement of such a thrilling encounter. This is the same guy who couldn't even feel any emotion when fighting in Bl@ster, but it was precisely because nobody in Bl@ster could match up to him and threaten his position as the champion that Akira started to feel numb. The same guy who wants to know what it's like to face death, and is now one step closer to it.

And now that Akira has finally fought someone who's way stronger than him and experiences what it's like to lose a fight, he realizes he's not as strong as he thought he was. This is the moment when Akira finally understands that Igra is a completely different experience from Bl@ster. It wasn't seeing a guy committing necrophilia, or watching the Executioners maniacally bashing someone's head in, or facing an opponent who is evenly matched with him (Takeru) that made him realize that Igra is nothing like Bl@ster. No, it was him getting his ass handed to by Shiki that made him realize this.

I'm going to pause for a moment here to draw a parallel between this Shikiaki scene and Shiki's first encounter with Nano, because it’s hard to talk about the Shikiaki dynamic without going into Shiki’s backstory and explaining his mindset and why he comes to be so fascinated with Akira in particular.

The following quote is what Shiki says at the very beginning of his drama CD:

Shiki: I have never forgotten, not once, have I forgot those vacant purple pupils. The anxiety and the feeling as if I was shivering...What led me to understand what fear was. That sole experience of humiliation in my memory. Since that day, I kept pursuing him. This memory of the weak experience in the past exists to bury that man.

(Credit to silver_spray on Livejournal for the translation. I'll be using their translation any time I cite text from Shiki's drama CD, since they have a full translation of his drama CD in one place.)

The translation is a little clunky, but we can understand what Shiki's saying in his monologue. He's talking about the day he saw Nano at the military base and how he experienced fear for the first time in his life. The reason why Shiki can't let go of this memory, and why he centers his ambition solely on the pursuit of Nano, is because Nano shattered Shiki’s self-perception and made Shiki doubt everything he knew about himself.

Shiki is someone who prides himself on his strength and bases his entire identity around being strong. He thinks that those who exhibit fear are "weak," and that's why he felt so humiliated when Nano made him feel fear for the first time. If experiencing fear makes one weak, then by Shiki's own logic, he's weak and not actually strong like he thought he was. Shiki couldn't reconcile this revelation with his mindset, and it fucked him up severely to realize he was no different from the "cowards" and "weaklings" he looked down upon.

It's not just that Nano made Shiki feel fear during their encounter; it's that Shiki derives meaning in his existence by believing he's strong and proving his strength, so having his sense of self challenged like this messed him up.

And just to make it clear: I’m not judging Shiki’s character by how complex, fleshed out, or sympathetic his backstory/motivation is. I don’t mind that Shiki has a “shallow” goal, and I certainly don't think that diminishes his chemistry with Akira. What matters to me most is how consistent Shiki’s character is in relation to the themes set up within his own route, and how well he acts as a foil to Akira. Shiki embodies all the values that Akira lacks in his own life (a strong sense of purpose, an inclination to live, the freedom to do as he will with his own existence), and him acting as a foil to Akira serves to further our understanding of Akira's character. In short: I’m judging Shiki's characterization, backstory, and motivation by how well all of these factors come together to form his dynamic with Akira.

In part one of this meta, I explained how Akira’s character embodies the theme of nihilism (life is meaningless, none of your actions have any intrinsic value, death just means the body stops functioning). Shiki’s character stands directly as a contrast to this. His character embodies the theme of existentialism (you create your own meaning in life, your actions define who you are, you have the freedom to dictate your own purpose and reason for existing). Shiki finds meaning in his existence by being strong, and his actions and attitude reflect that. He walks his own path in life and doesn’t let anyone or anything impede him.

After his meeting with Nano, Shiki devotes his life to the goal of surpassing Nano—the one person who made him feel weak, who made him feel fear, who made him taste the humiliation of defeat—and his desire for revenge consumes him so much that it inadvertently becomes his sole purpose for existing.

So the big difference between Shiki and Akira is: Akira doesn’t see any reason to live, let alone a meaning to his own existence, while Shiki has made surpassing Nano his entire purpose and reason for living—his raison d'être, if you will.

If Akira's nihilism makes him believe that nothing in life has any value or meaning, therefore nothing he does matter, then Shiki's existentialism makes him believe that he can determine his own meaning in life (being the strongest) through his actions, therefore he'll devote himself to this one goal to validate his existence.

It’s the perfect setup for their dynamic. It’s not just that Shiki and Akira clash as characters—it’s that their philosophies, the very set of values that shape who they are and how they view themselves in the world, are in direct opposition with each other, but it's this polarity that makes them drawn to each other, and it’s what leads to their eventual character growths.

Again, I’m not an expert on philosophy, but to be fair, I don’t think the game is trying to do a meaningful dissection of these themes, either. It simply uses them as a framework for Shiki’s and Akira’s characterizations and their dynamic, and thus my analysis is also applied that way in this meta. I’m not focusing on their philosophies so much as I’m focusing on how, exactly, their opposing mindsets influence the way they interact and view each other, and how, eventually, their dynamic shifts from mutual hate to mutual respect.

This meta in general will focus on Akira's and Shiki's characterizations because I think their compatibility is most evident in how they individually change and complete each other's character arcs.

Getting back to the point of how Shiki and Akira’s first meeting parallels Shiki and Nano’s first meeting, Nano made Shiki feel utterly weak and powerless for the first time in his life, and Shiki does the same here to Akira. Shiki believed he was the strongest prior to his encounter with Nano, and Akira never fought anyone who could come close to beating him in Bl@ster. Even in Igra, Akira was evenly matched with Takeru. The circumstances are very similar, but the reason why Akira doesn’t feel nearly as devastated from experiencing defeat after his fight with Shiki is because unlike Shiki, he never based his identity or existence around being strong or invincible. Sure, his pride is hurt, and now he knows that being the undefeated Bl@ster champion doesn’t actually mean anything, but he just brushes it off and accepts the outcome.

The point I’m trying to make with this parallel is: Shiki takes up the role of "Nano" in his encounters with Akira, but because of this, he also sees himself in Akira when Akira struggles against him. You could say that Shiki projects onto Akira, and the reason why he likes it when Akira fights back is because it makes him feel validated in his own struggle against Nano.

But as much as I'm trying to say there's a parallel between these two scenes, there's actually a pointed difference: Shiki was overcome with fear when he faced Nano and wanted to "erase" that fear by killing Nano, while Akira stood his ground and locked eyes with Shiki as a way of challenging Shiki’s dominance. In fact, there's nothing in the text that indicates Akira feels any fear during this scene with Shiki; just anticipation and excitement. And this distinction is what leads Shiki to become so fascinated by Akira’s behavior and mindset. When confronted with the same circumstance, why is it that Akira is able to fight back without succumbing to fear?

So there’s two reasons in particular for why Akira stands out to Shiki during their first encounter:

Akira didn’t run away like the other fighters

Akira didn’t show fear/"Look Away" even when he was clearly outclassed in their fight

We know that Shiki considers people who exhibit fear to be weak. So what does that make Akira, then?

I'm leaving that question open-ended because I don't think even Shiki himself can answer that question. He might call Akira a weakling, but he obviously shows a different thought in his actions if he chooses to let Akira live, and Shiki isn’t the type of person whose words should be taken at face value considering he tries to suppress his emotions in order to be strong.

Akira is different from all the people Shiki has met before; there’s no denying that, and this feeling of "I've never met anyone like you" is mutual. For Akira, it's the first time he's met someone who can make him feel completely outclassed. For Shiki, it's the first time he's encountered someone who met his gaze in battle instead of succumbing to fear.

Okay. We are finally done analyzing this (very iconic) scene. Onto the next one.

Akira gets ambushed by three dudes, almost gets raped, also gets his arm stabbed, and then manages to barely escape because one of the guys started having a reaction after tasting Akira’s blood on his knife. Akira tries to process what happened, realizes it’s “pointless to dwell on the matter” and then decides to reflect on his encounter with Shiki instead. Like… this just shows where Akira’s priorities lie. He’s more focused on his encounter with Shiki than the encounter he just had with those three men, even though the latter was a much more dangerous and terrifying situation for him.

"He’s actually got quite the fanclub going."

(Can confirm that a Shiki fanclub exists because I’m in it.)

Jokes aside, if it wasn’t obvious enough before that Akira is interested in Shiki (especially after such an intense encounter), then it should be clear now. He tries to gather some info about Shiki from Motomi but doesn’t learn much aside from the fact that Shiki’s apparently not interested in challenging Il Re and probably has "some other goal."

The next time Shiki and Akira meet is right after Nano leaves a suitcase in Akira's hand and informs him that, "A man will be here soon."

That man turns out to be Shiki. What's interesting to me is how civil this interaction starts out—as civil as you can get with someone like Shiki. The last time they met, Shiki nearly killed Akira, and the only reason Akira came out of that fight alive was because Shiki chose to spare him.

After Shiki checks the contents of the suitcase, he threatens Akira and tells him to "forget everything [he] saw here." But think about it: if Shiki really wanted to make sure Akira wouldn't tell anyone, he could just kill Akira and permanently silence him. And yet he's making the decision to spare Akira, again. Shiki, the guy who's infamous for killing people whenever he shows up and making everyone run away at the sight of him.

Shiki's already treating Akira differently from the rest. If a random thug had been there in the alleyway instead of Akira, I think it's safe to assume Shiki would've killed the guy already without going through all this trouble of making a threat. But he gives Akira the opportunity to live, so long as Akira agrees to his demand of course, and it's probably because he remembers and acknowledges Akira's bravery from their previous encounter.

And now we get the classic Shikiaki moment of Shiki and Akira meeting each other's eyes. Akira is backed into a position where he has to obey or else Shiki will kill him, but we know from Akira’s previous encounters with the police that he hates being pushed around and told what to do, and any time someone tries to subdue him, he responds in a rebellious manner. It’s interesting to note that the text goes out of its way to state that Akira feels fear during this moment, which is understandable given how Shiki has his sword right at his throat and he’s one slice away from dying. But instead of succumbing to his fear and obeying quietly, Akira chooses to defy Shiki.

Shiki asks Akira if he would rather die, to which Akira decides yes, he would. And this decision is so important to the dynamic between them. It's what compels Shiki to keep pushing Akira so that he can see how far Akira is willing to risk death just for the sake of defying him. It's what makes Akira start to develop agency through his actions and find meaning in the choices he makes. This moment is the impetus for their dynamic in the way that it sets up all their future interactions onward.

Akira takes it one step further and even taunts Shiki to kill him. This is how much he despises being subjugated to someone else.

The reason why Akira deliberately provokes Shiki is because it's his own way of trying to take back control of the situation. If Akira is the one making the demands—"You might as well kill me"—then Shiki will technically be the one obeying Akira if he does kill him.

I've been talking a lot about how Shiki and Akira are different, how their characterizations make them clash, and how their philosophies oppose each other on a fundamental level, but actually, part of what makes their dynamic so compelling and intense is that they're… extremely similar when you think about it. They're both stubborn, strong-willed, determined to have their own way, and they refuse to submit to others, which is how you end up with this dynamic where neither of them are willing to relent. Ironically, these traits that add conflict and tension to their dynamic are the same traits that end up making them respect each other by the end of Shiki's route.

Shiki is just as stubborn as Akira is when it comes to not wanting to be under the control of someone else, which is why he chooses not to kill Akira despite the blatant provocation.

The other factor for why Shiki doesn't kill Akira during this scene is because he views Akira as an anomaly. He's so used to other Igra fighters begging for mercy from him that it genuinely catches him off guard that Akira would refuse to beg for his life.

Shiki doesn't kill Akira because on some level, he respects Akira's pride, fearlessness, and determination. Akira doesn't let his fear stop him from lashing out against Shiki.

We know that Akira feels fear during this moment because the text made a point of explicitly telling us so: "Akira felt afraid, but at the same time, he felt a rising indignation." But there's a nuance to it. Shiki thinks feeling fear is a sign of weakness—that’s why he felt so humiliated when Nano made him feel fear. Akira, on the other hand, doesn’t associate fear with humiliation or weakness; rather, being forced into submission is what makes him feel humiliated and weak, which is why he stubbornly resists Shiki in spite of the fear he feels.

The difference between Shiki and Akira is that Shiki lets his fear of Nano control his actions, while Akira doesn’t let his fear control him. And this distinction plays a big role in why Shiki slowly comes to respect Akira.

Going back to the text, Shiki decides to spare Akira, but he calls Akira a “fool.” It’s not really clear why he specifically uses this term to insult Akira, but based on my own interpretation of Shiki’s character, this is what I believe: he calls Akira a fool because he thinks it’s foolish that Akira doesn’t value or respect his own life.

Even though Shiki goes around killing people for the hell of it, I think he actually values life—way more than Akira does, at least. He only kills the people who he deems to be weak, and lets people like Akira and Rin (for a while) live. But I think Shiki’s perspective on life is most telling in the way he views his own life. He dedicates his whole life to achieving this one goal, and goes about it in an extremely unhealthy way, uncaring of the consequences that come with the path he takes.

If Akira doesn’t see a point in living because he thinks life has no meaning or value, then Shiki is the polar opposite of him in that he holds his own life in high regard, such that every action he takes has a purpose/meaning to it.

The text tells us, unambiguously, that the reason why Akira got so worked up during this confrontation is because the one thing he can't stand is people trying to control him. Again, Akira's characterization has been very consistent so far. His interactions with Shiki and the way they play out feel organic because both of their actions and dialogue match what we know of their characterizations and philosophies.

The text also reminds us that Akira was feeling terror during this moment with Shiki. But he's not humiliated over feeling fear; he's angry that he was pushed around and forced to bend to someone's will.

We know how Akira feels after this confrontation, but what about on Shiki's end? Well, this is Shiki's POV from the drama CD:

(For context, he's just killed three men who were on Rein and is dissatisfied by how weak they were.)

Shiki: I know, even if drugs are used, if Line is used, that a suitable person that can show as strong a power as that man won't appear so easily. But the chance is not zero. That's why I am providing the original fluid of Line to Arbitro and going along with his nonsense. But, why is there still this incomprehensible irritation? [Flashback] Akira: Then just kill me. Shiki: You want to give up and seek death? Akira: It's better than having to beg you for mercy. [End flashback] Shiki: Foolish. Just a nobody I happened to let off.

We learn that the reason why Shiki goes around distributing Rein is because he wants to face worthy opponents, and the whole Igra system is set up so that only those who are strong enough to collect a correct set of tags can challenge Il Re. But the thing is, Shiki looks down on people who use Rein for power instead of relying on their internal strength. He’s looking for strong opponents who use Rein so he can reaffirm his belief that self-made strength is superior to the strength gained from drugs.

It's a very contrived way of proving his strength, but it speaks to how much he fears and despises Nano. Shiki wants to surpass Nano, but he knows he can’t get close to him, so instead, he wants to kill those who have gained power via Rein as a way of reassuring himself that he is strong, and that he's better than Nano and everyone else because he doesn't have to rely on the power of the Nicole virus.

Unfortunately, there haven't been any new challengers for Il Re lately, much to his dismay. Shiki mostly spends his spare time killing random thugs in Toshima to sate his bloodlust, and during one of these killings, Shiki feels irritated for some reason. Then his mind flashes back to his encounter with Akira, and it's heavily implied that this memory is the source of his current emotional conflict. He remembers Akira's backbone during their confrontation, then tries to dismiss it by telling himself that Akira is "just a nobody."

It's obvious Shiki is in denial of his own emotions because if Akira really was just a nobody, Shiki wouldn't even be sparing him a second thought like he is now. Clearly that encounter affected him more than he would like to admit. And take note of how this flashback is contrasted with the preceding segment of Shiki mulling over how he hasn't been able to find any worthy opponents in a while, and how even though Rein is spreading around the city, the strength of your typical Igra fighter is still too low for his standards. Shiki's monologue and the flashback with Akira are deliberately juxtaposed in a way that helps us infer how Shiki views Akira.

Shiki recalls this memory with Akira specifically because Akira stands out as an outlier among all the Igra fighters he's encountered. Akira is someone who doesn't neatly fit into Shiki's definition of a weakling. He's not strong because Shiki is superior to him in terms of physical strength. But he's not weak either because he doesn't submit to anyone, and he doesn't give in to his fear of death. Most people beg for mercy in front of Shiki, but Akira is different in that he would rather die than ever endure the humiliation of begging.

We can see that Shiki has started to take an interest in Akira, even if he acts in denial about it.

I'm going to jump ahead now to this other scene where Akira is thinking to himself after the Meal of Duty massacre and his fight with Takeru. It's not a Shikiaki scene because it's about Takeru, but I'm including it here for the sake of Akira's characterization because it provides us some perspective on Akira's values.

The last time Akira and Takeru met was in Meal of Duty. Takeru was on Rein and was fully intent on killing Akira, but Akira barely managed to escape thanks to his blood. By all means, Akira shouldn’t have any reason to sympathize with Takeru or even feel any concern for him, especially after Takeru tried to kill him. It's not like they knew each other all that well, and their encounters were always colored in hostility thanks to Takeru's aggression. Akira shouldn't feel bad or care about what happens to Takeru; he hardly cares about people in general, but he expresses some sympathy toward him because Takeru is different.

Akira himself doesn't really know why he's concerned for Takeru, but he has enough self-awareness to understand that it's probably because he "caught a glimpse of something inside Takeru… some seething passion that set him apart from the other Igra fighters."

I've been talking a lot about how the reason why Shiki becomes so obsessed with Akira is because Akira is different from all the other Igra fighters. Akira doesn't like to back down, he doesn't cower in fear or submit to anyone even when forced into a life-or-death scenario.

But, on the other side of this, Akira also develops an obsession with Shiki because Shiki is so different from any of the fighters he's met before. He's drawn to the way Shiki is so single-mindedly dedicated to his goal and how he'll stop at nothing to achieve it.

I'm not going to go in-depth about it here because I want to save my analysis for when we actually get to the moonlight scene and learn more about Shiki's motivation, but I just wanted to throw that thought out there for now.

---

This is where I’ll end off part two for now. Part three will be a direct continuation of this.

[Next] Part Three: Shiki and Akira's Encounters (II)

[minotaur-asterion]

The voices, and when they get down with the sickness (long post underneath, please prepare yourself):

I think Hero kind of wishes they could act out that classic sickfic scene where they get to stay in bed all day and someone brings them soup and takes good care of them. Well, it’ll never happen with that nervous attitude, so until they get the balls to ask someone they’ll have to suck it up and take care of themselves. So, so tired the entire time. Poor meow meow

Alternatively, Hero’s a doting caretaker, if not physically distant. Doesn’t want to catch anything… but rest assured, they’re at their charge’s beck and call- they’ll bring food, medicine, heating pads, blankets, the crown of Russia, Russia, and more!

Cold can’t tell until something really noticeable happens, and even then it can be a while before he figures out he’s sick. Oh, his nose is running? It has been getting cold recently, no pun intended. He collapsed? Has to determine whether it was lack of sleep or if he got stabbed recently and that was blood loss; illness just doesn’t immediately come to mind. Might get a little loopy and out of it while recovering. Appreciates the lack of taste if forced to eat

Cold’s really good at treating sick folks, but taking care of them can be 50/50 depending on who it is. If he actually gives a shit he mostly curls up in a chair nearby and chills- again, pun not intended- until they need something. He might even offer the briefest of cuddles, which depending on his charge’s strength might end up lasting a lot longer than he planned

Cheated gets sick a lot- he doesn’t get much sleep so his body doesn’t have a lot of energy to fight it off. It’s total chaos if he gets a fever. Complains soooo much. But he gets very warmly happy if someone throws in the towel to take care of him. Wants to snuggle a lot

He refuses to take care of most of the others. Fuck them! But he’s probably going to get roped into it one way or another, knowing his luck. The only people he’d actually agree to care for is Opportunist and Contrarian since they live together. I’ve always imagined those three as a package deal anyway

Speaking of Opportunist- ey’re used to a little bit of body ache, so ey’re able to power through the less severe colds and such, just take it a little easier than usual, wear a mask to work, you know. It gets trickier when severe sickness aligns with a bad back day, ey don’t enjoy feeling like that while barely being able to move around. Ey’re honored if anyone decides to help, honestly…

Opportunist is a believer in laughter being the best medicine. He likes to talk and talk about all sorts of things just to take his charge’s mind off their symptoms. He also likes to hear himself talk, so it’s a bonus, really!

Contrarian… surprisingly barely ever gets sick. Or, at least, they don’t let on most of the times they do. Maybe they get a little quieter, but it’s surprisingly easy to melt into the crowd for them. It’s probably easier to not expect or ask for anything anyway

But on the contrary, pun intended this time, Contrarian loves to help out and take care of sick folks. God knows he’s not helpful at all with treating the sickness- which makes me think he’d be a good duo with Cold- but he’ll certainly entertain and keep company. “Oh, but you’ll catch something-“ he definitely will, but it’s worth it!

Paranoid is fascinated by disease. Would probably get sick and immediately think “how can I turn this into a zombie-making virus?” Jots down every single sniffle in her journal. Studies the microorganisms that caused it. Just really weird and iconically herself about it. The few times she does sleep, her dreams will be even weirder than usual. I think her obsession with recording the darn thing is overriding the symptoms

It’s much the same with when someone else is sick- pencil to paper, on a scale of one to ten how bad do you feel, describe your symptoms, can I get a swab for totally normal not nefarious reasons. Makes sure to wash her hands after existing in the same room as anyone who’s sick

Broken genuinely doesn’t think it’ll make it. Sure, it’s a really light flu, but it just won’t survive. Most illnesses are similar to a bad pain day regardless of how bad they’d normally be, but the good thing about the whole ordeal is snuggles and attention… Even if it’s out like a light most of the time. Might get weird and horny about it

Broken gets really worried about the others when they’re sick, and usually sticks them in bed if he can even move them there. Perches at the foot of the bed and watches closely. A little creepy, but he means well. So so so worried

Hunted’s surprisingly clean, so it’s hard for it to get too sick. Very pragmatic approach to dealing with it, which includes keeping everything clean during times when it feels better and resting when it feels worse. Doesn’t enjoy it for a second, especially when it clogs its ears and nose, but it’ll survive

Goes a little haywire when someone else is sick. You’ve never bore witness to the kind of strength it can muster to get someone in its nest. Protective as all get out, preens and tries to spoon feed. Will only allow people it trusts with its life- and maybe not even that depending on how feral it is- near the nest

Stubborn isn’t one to get sick often, and even then through the sheer power of, I dunno, muscles or something, he can fight it off pretty well. Just lay off the baking for a bit so he doesn’t accidentally infect anyone… In the rarest cases where he just can’t keep going as usual, he becomes surprisingly tame. Too tired to get all worked up. Sleepy little guy…

They can also be surprisingly helpful, especially with calming down a much stronger personality (cough. Hunted) who’s also trying to take care of someone sick. Makes the meanest fucking soup you’ve ever had the pleasure of tasting. And I say this with Broken definitely in mind, but they get a little affectionate about it. Just a smidge. Not because they care about this person, no! Don’t be ridiculous

Smitten probably gets sick all the time from his flower allergies, but he can’t bring himself to stop gardening. That’s why he got allergy medicine. If it’s not allergies he’s stumped on what to do. Might even get dramatic about it- write his will, eat some ice cream while watching his favorite rom com shows (he knows at least that sugar can help calm nausea), read Shakespeare, uh… I don’t know what else he’d do but it’d be dramatic!

Smitten’s a total sweetheart when taking care of someone else. Breakfast in bed, reads to them (dyslexic, does silly voices), treats them like total royalty. The drawback? Literally never takes care of anyone on a whim. Has to be planned, premeditated. Draws up a schedule of the whole thing

Skeptic likes to take sick days slow. Sit in the butterfly garden. Unless it’s winter. Then he’ll just stay in bed the whole day. Probably hibernates through the illness and wakes up crusty but healthy

He’ll certainly try his best to take care of someone else, but he’s not that great at it. Good at reassuring them about their anxieties though. Gives them a little too much medicine

I have a feeling Meek might be immune to disease. Otherwise she’d fucking die. Sneezes so loudly it’s like a bomb went off

She’s also not great about helping someone through their sickness, but she’ll scoot into their lap and offer them to pet her. The others suspect she might even like being pet… she will vehemently deny it though

Flinching is very shaky when she’s sick. Terrible grip strength. She’ll realize something’s off when she accidentally drops her favorite mug and now has to sadly stare at it on the ground before Doubting picks it up and puts it back together (he made a mug that’s easy to repair specifically for this reason)

Very gentle with sick people, almost as though she’s afraid to break them. Wonderful bedside manner. If she wasn’t so squeamish she would’ve tried becoming a nurse, but alas, just a librarian for now…

Doubting’s vision is usually bleary, but eventually he’ll figure out something’s wrong when he puts his glasses on and he still can’t see well. He’s a good patient, though, and recovers quickly with the right conditions

A lot like Flinching, he’s also good about taking care of others. May or may not be developing experimental treatments for diseases though. Do not touch those beakers

Much like a huge disoriented beast, Obsessed doesn’t do well with sickness. It messes with them badly. Not as clean as Hunted about it but definitely not to be trifled with still. Think like a rabid animal, how they can lose their fear of certain things and just… stare

They don’t live near anyone, so there’s nobody to take care of when sick

[aannonn]

jibaku shounen hanako kun chapter 108..... LET'S GO!

Nene is such an icon istg lmao I love her so much <3

Wait wha- woah! Tsukasa is defenseless now? That's not something you see everyday. Is that good or bad? lol

Twin Power!!1!

Tsukasa-kun... Poor kid. Amane really messed up, didn't he?

Can't really blame him, tho- The world was just too cruel and unfair to those 2. They are just kids😭

...This part really hurts me. Idk why but its just- Tsukasa just seems like he's just- He just- Tsukasa is just like- It seems to me that Tsukasa is like-

"Oh.

Oh."

then;

"Amane.. Amane, are you listening? Amane, can you hear me? Amane, are you coming? Amane, do you hate me? Amane, is that why you never came for me? Amane, I can't die anymore Amane, but I feel like you're slowly killing me again. Amane. Amane. Amane. Amane. Amane. Amane. AmaneAmaneAmaneAmaneAmaneamanemaneamaneamaneamane-"

something like that lol

Idk its just seems to me that Tsukasa gave up. But at the same time he is unconsciously taking Nene's request seriously about calling his brother (Twin Power!) so he started calling Amane in his mind and then- welp

this scene hurts me alot. ;') can't wait to finally watch it animated! (i feel like watching it animated will just hurt me even more omg-)

He came! He finally came! Twin Power worked1!!1

Tsukasa looks so surprised. Amane looks pretty annoyed lol

Honestly, I really really believe that Tsukasa actually called for him, and Amane actually listened.

I mean- Think about this;

Yes, Nene called for Hanako, but that was before they both (Tsukasa and Nene) fell down. And while Hanako may have delayed a lil' bit, there is something that make me think that Tsukasa did actually call for Amane..

While they are falling, it appears this;

It's open for many interpretation and possibilities, but I feel like this is to represent that Tsukasa did actually call for Amane, just not out-loud.

I like to think that; In my own point of view, it's like;

It seems to me that Tsukasa did called him from the very deep bottom of his heart. He didn't speak, but he for sure screamed for Amane from the very bottom of his heart.

He wanted Amane to come (he never said he didn't). He said that Amane wouldn't come for him anyway, but that doesn't mean that he didn't want to call for him. It doesn't mean that he didn't want Amane to come.

Tsukasa has been wishing for his brother to come to him for a long time, but Amane never did. And Tsukasa was always alone. So I think that hope slowly faded away.

Although, Amane remains being his older brother, and Tsukasa continues to love him more than anything in the world, so he can't help but let himself spark that hope again, let himself call Amane again, even though he knew it probably wouldn't work, like it never did. But he still took what Nene' said seriously, and so he decided to try it, only one last time.

So imagine his surprise when he sees that it actually worked. That Amane actually came for him.

He looks so shocked, amazed, devasted, surprised; He's feeling alot of emotions at once.

so many emotions that he doesn't even do the ":O" face anymore.

It's an genuine and unexpected surprise. Amane actually came. Amane actually listened. Amane actually-

He saved them both omg I love them sm

this panel gives me many siblings vibes.

Amane just looks so done with them lmao

Normal! Nene would never say things like this, but she's a kid and kids are usually more confident and say things without thinking too much about it so-

Hanako is amazed. Flustered. Shocked.

Happy;3

Tsukasa looks so indignated for being the third-wheel lmao

perfect.

they are actually acting like siblings omgg i love them sm

tsukasa did not had to bring up chapter 105 again but he did.

Idk why but i really love this panel with all the three of them together. They give me siblings-who-just-got-caught-fighting vibes lol

:O

TSUKASA AND TERU IN THE VERY SAME ROOM???? IN THE VERY SAME PLACE??? AT THE VERY SAME TIME?????

interaction is gonna happen. i'm telling you

finally.. the day has finally come... Tsukasa + Teru interaction is finally gonna happen........ AFTER YEARS OF WAITING WE FINALLY HAVE ARRIVED TO THIS MOMENT PEOPLE

Welp! i think that's it...? Excited for the next chapter yayayaya

it feels like this chapter delayed a whole bunch... but time for me just went by pretty slow actually...

Welp! I think that's finally it..?

Cya ~ !

part 2 of this post!

[xtrastuff]

It's my birthday today. So I decided to make this little fun story of one of Javelin's birthdays!

Everyone shouted in my ear, their voices overlapping in a cacophony of excitement.

"Happy birthday, Javelin!"

I sat there, stunned, as I gazed at the cake with candles not yet lit. The scene felt surreal. Ms. Undyne had explained that this was a 'birthday,' a celebration of one's birth into the world. The problem was, I didn't exactly remember when I was born. So, Ms. Undyne had assigned me a date—August 26th, two weeks after her own.

I didn't mind it, but it seemed a bit... extra. Still, the effort everyone put into this celebration was heartwarming. Even the famous fashion icon Ms. Mewmew showed up, to Ms. Alphys' surprise, which was a lot. I wonder how many people Undyne knows.

"Come on now, blow out the candles, dear!" Mettaton's voice chimed in. He was that flamboyant robot who hosted various shows on TV. "The cameras are watching. Everyone wants to see the birthday of the son of the Chief of Police."

He wasn't kidding—there were at least three cameras trained on me, their red lights blinking. Was he trying to turn this into a reality show?

"Don't try to turn his celebration into one of your crappy shows!" Undyne barked, pushing Mettaton out of the way. Her single eye glared at him with a mixture of irritation and protectiveness. "This is about and for him."

“Well darling I paid for Shyren to sing one of her best performances, and I paid for most of the gifts, so having a bit of cameras on him isn’t too bad now.”

I looked around the room, taking in the faces of everyone who had come to celebrate with me. Alphys sat next to me while Papyrus stood behind me."It brings a tear to my eye, seeing the great UNCLE Papyrus' little friend grow up. It hurts as much as when Frisk grew up so fast," Papyrus said, his skeletal grin softening with a touch of nostalgia.

I always wondered why he started that whole 'uncle' thing. Sure, I'm technically Ms. Undyne's kid, but I doubt they're related. He just kind of started calling himself that out of nowhere. But honestly, it's harmless and even endearing.

While everyone had their eyes on me, I took a moment to stand up. I lowered my head, feeling the weight of the moment.

I wanted to make a speech. A part of me felt like I didn't deserve any of this—the effort, the respect, the love. But despite those doubts, I was grateful, and I wanted them to know.

I let out a breath, and the room fell silent, all eyes on me.

"Thanks, everyone, really. I haven't known any of you for long, and I know myself even less, but I'm very thankful that you were the people I ended up calling family."

Undyne wrestled my hair a bit to my dismay.

"Now you’re stuck with us punk. And maybe when you get a bit older, you’ll be as tough as me!” Undyne said.

Alphys nervously chuckled. But she didn’t need to say anything for me to know how she felt.

Papyrus stepped forward, his bony hand resting on my shoulder. His smile was as wide as ever.

“Undyne was a hero, I was also amazing her, and you shall be as well young Javelin!" he said. Then, with a dramatic flair, he added, "And don't forget, you have the AMAZING UNCLE Papyrus to guide you!"

The old turtle also nodded from far away in the crowd. If it wasn’t for my good eyesight I wouldn’t have seen him.

Mettaton, despite his earlier antics, seemed genuinely moved. His normally flashy demeanor was toned down as he approached with a smile.

"That was a beautiful speech, darling," he said, giving a small bow. “Now, someone lights the candles for him so we see him blow these out.”

Ms. Alphys reached for the lighter, but Undyne managed to snag it first, her toothy grin spreading wide as she held it up.

"Alright, punk, get ready to blow these out!" she said with enthusiasm.

A flame flickered to life from the lighter. I watched as it slowly approached one of the candles. Everyone seemed kind of excited, their faces lit up by the warm glow. But then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ms. Alphys' eyes shoot wide open as if she had just realized something critical.

I wondered what it was—

...

Undyne burned the house down. I don't know how or why, but it probably had something to do with one of Ms. Alphys' rules: 'Never let Undyne cook or near anything flammable.'

Honestly, I was surprised, not just because we all made it out fine, but because it happened almost instantly.

"MY EXPENSIVE GIFTS!" Mettaton shouted, his usual composure lost in a moment of melodramatic despair. Ms. Undyne, surprisingly, was relaxed, standing with her hands on her hips as if surveying the damage with a sense of accomplishment. What was stranger was Ms. Alphys, who wore a look of absolute indifference.

"Well, I at least brought this," Gerson said, handing me a cupcake. He had a gruff, wise air about him, his eyes twinkling with a hint of amusement. "I was gonna snag it and leave, but consider it your present."

I smiled, taking the cupcake with gratitude. "Honestly, I'm happy with this."

The remnants of the party were chaotic, yet somehow it felt fitting. We stood outside. Despite everything that happened, we were still enjoying ourselves. We even laughed at it really.

If this is what a birthday is like then... I think I'm fine with that.

[sineala]

Hi Sine! I find myself in possession of a very long plot (not going to count how many of those are in my inventory), and was hoping you'd share what program(s) you use for yours? I'm the sort who'd use a murder-wall with notecards but I don't have space rn. I *should* use tagging systems but all the ones available are so sketchy and unreliable that I lose focus just typing. Also I tried to search but. This is tumbs. Thanks - Shusu

Oh boy, this question was made for me!

The first novel-length story I wrote, I wrote in TextEdit. All 90,000 words of it. I basically just made a list of the scenes I wanted in the order I wanted them in, started typing the story above the list, and deleted every scene from the list when I had written it. I don't recommend this.

These days, I use Scapple and Scrivener. I have much more detail below. I am sure I have talked about them before but, as you say, Tumblr is hard to search.

Different things will work for different people, and I don't always start this way, but sometimes, while I'm still trying to rough out an idea, I start with a mind mapping program. You know that brainstorming technique that you learned in, like, third grade, where you take a piece of paper and you write down the main idea in the center in a bubble and then branch lines out from those with more bubbles containing related ideas, and then branch things out from those, and so on? You can get programs to do that instead of a big piece of paper, and the advantage to doing this on a computer is that your piece of paper can be infinitely large and you won't ever run out of space.

I will sometimes skip this step if I already know what order things are going to happen in (in that case, I just make an outline), but if it's the kind of unformed idea where I just want to write down everything that happens as I think of it so I won't forget it later, then I use a mind map.

I also use it to write down bits of dialogue as I think of them; the program I use lets me change fonts and colors and so on, so I have color-coded my dialogue by character:

I feel like I have probably posted this before but Tumblr is not letting me search. Also, this is probably not how you're supposed to use this, judging by how it exports data, but whatever.

There are a variety of programs that can help you make mind maps, and I'm sure a lot of them are good. The one I use is Scapple, which I like for a few reasons: it's very easy to use (you type something in, and then to connect two bubbles you drag one on top of the other) in a way that gives you a lot of freedom; it's not a subscription model like a lot of apps are (you buy it, you pay once, you can use it forever, and it costs about $20); and mostly, it's made by the developer of the writing program I use (Scrivener), meaning that the two programs integrate very well.

So then there's Scrivener.

Scrivener is probably the absolute most useful software I have ever owned; I have bought it four times now. (All three desktop versions and then the iOS version.) It is a word processor that is designed to help you structure and write novels. There are similar programs for free or at least cheaper, of course, but this is the one I use. (It also isn't a subscription; you just buy it.)

The downside is that it's a very complex program. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it can look a little daunting. It's one of those programs that has hundreds of features and you will only use about fifty percent of them, but everyone uses a different fifty percent, so there's something for everyone. (It can generate character names! There's a feature on the Mac version where it can highlight words by part of speech! You can change all the icons! The LaTeX export is pretty decent!)

Honestly, as long as you can figure out how to make scenes, rearrange scenes, edit synopses, and get your work out of the program, you're good to go; that's probably what you'll be doing most of the time.

Scrivener is basically designed around the murder-wall-of-notecards writing approach. A Scrivener project contains your Draft, which can have a bunch of folders in it (chapters) which can have individual documents (scenes). Each scene has an index card associated with it, and each index card is where you can write a synopsis for each scene.

You can view your story as single scenes or as a whole story (optionally with a window showing the synopses, so you can remember what you thought was going to happen while you are writing; I have shown this above) or you can just view the synopses as an outline or as index cards, like so:

There's your murder wall right there.

Rearranging the index cards also rearranges the scenes. (Rearranging the scenes using the list in the sidebar also rearranges the scenes.) So if you want to swap scenes around, you can do that. If you want to write the end first, you can do that. If you want to add three more scenes in the middle, you can do that.

You can also search your whole project, color code the index cards, tag them however you want with keywords (e.g., a keyword for every character who appears in the scene) and then look at everything you've tagged with particular keywords, notate scenes by whether they're done or not, and basically everything else you can think of. Mostly I have used this to color code scenes by POV so I can keep track of who's talking; I could also have used keywords.

So my first move when I start a project in Scrivener is to make a bunch of blank documents for all the scenes I think I will have, give them some kind of meaningful title, start writing down on the notecards things that will happen in each scene, and then move them around. This is where Scapple comes in handy -- both because I already have an idea from making a mind map in Scapple of what scenes I want, and also because the integration between Scapple and Scrivener makes it really, really easy to get started.

How do Scapple and Scrivener integrate, you ask? If you make a mind map in Scapple, you can drag and drop it into Scrivener and it will automatically make one scene for every bubble you have, and the text of each bubble will be on the notecard, so you can basically start with all of your scenes that you already have made in Scapple and then reorder them as you like.

Scrivener projects also have a Research section, where you can store basically anything related to what you're working on; you can set it to show your draft and your research at the same time. Basically anything can go in here. Mine usually have notes, more notes, character information, lines I cut but wanted to save somewhere (there is also a versioning system built in if you prefer that), comics panels, reference pictures, and entire webpages. This way, you'll never have to figure out what you did with that thing you looked up for your story, because you can keep it right there with your story.

Scrivener costs $60, which is kind of a lot, but there are very often coupons for 50% off from online software retailers (I just saw one on Boing Boing a couple days ago that still works as of the time I am answering this; I can vouch that they are a legit retailer). Also if you know anyone who has won NaNoWriMo, they get a Scrivener coupon as part of their winnings, and some people don't use theirs. It has a thirty-day free trial period (IIRC that's 30 days of use, not 30 calendar days) so you can try it and see if it works for you.

I also made a Compile Format for Scrivener 3 -- the current version -- so I can export HTML suitable for AO3 or Dreamwidth in one click. Scrivener can export your work in basically any format you can think of, but the default HTML exports all have too much stuff in them for my liking.

(Scrivener also has a bunch of preset templates for various kinds of writing -- like, there's a Novel template with room for character sheets and settings and all of that. You can make your own template, too. I actually made my own template for writing fanfiction for AO3. I'm not sharing this one because it is so personalized to me that it wouldn't be useful -- but, for example, I already know that I'm going to want a document in my Research section where I list notes about canon, and one where I list what bits I need to edit, and one where I copy in any conversations I've had with beta readers that I might want to refer to, and one where I list the things that will be in the AO3 header (it contains empty spaces for Title, Fandom, Tags, Summary, etc) so I can now always start with that. You can make a template yourself by opening a new project, setting it up exactly the way you like with the Research documents exactly the way you want, and then doing File > Save as Template. It will copy everything including any text that's in there so you want to use something that doesn't already have any story or research content written in it because then that will get copied. But it's a real timesaver.)

Anyway. Scrivener is the best.

[licncourt]

moments in VC that alter my brain chemistry (in a good way)

I thought was a good idea so thank you to @prouvaireafterdark for tagging me in @msrandonstuff 's request for a list like this!

I have to specify "(in a good way)" because there is so much wtf nonsense in these books, but I will gladly do a separate "(in a bad way)" list if y'all want. These are mostly from the first two books because they're by FAR the best, but there are a couple from the third and from the last three. If you've seen my Loustat moments post, you've seen everything you need to see from the middle books.

I've included page numbers for all these, but they won't apply to every version of the books. Fortunately, I have a Google Drive folder of VC book PDFs that these correspond to linked here

Spoilers, obviously.

Louis' turning in Interview with the Vampire p. 22-24 (romantic, sexy horror at its finest)

THE PROSTITUTE SCENE in IWTV p. 83-94 (an abridged version is in the 1994 movie, but the AMC show replaced it, rather anticlimactically imo, with the tenor scene. I have a breakdown of what makes the OG version so incredible right here)

Claudia's turning in IWTV p. 97-101 (while I understand the reasoning behind the changes in the AMC show, I prefer the book version. Additional Claudia spoilers here)

Louis' confession and slaughter of the priest in IWTV p. 154-156 (still heartbroken that this was storyboarded but cut from the movie, AMC better give it to me)

Claudia's "murder" of Lestat in IWTV p. 143-145 (gaslight gatekeep girlboss)

Louis and Lestat's brief reunion at the end of IWTV p. 340-346 (fucking brutal, iconic though and way gayer than the movie version)

The intro of The Vampire Lestat p. 1-3 (the first page is written, I swear to you, in the style of My Immortal, but I love it)

Lestat's first date with Nicolas as mortals in TVL p. 30-35 (Loustat is everything but human Nickistat is soooo baby)

Lestat's turning in TVL p. 63-66 (big CW for non-con, but a amazingly chilling scene)

Lestat finds the dungeon of Magnus' tower in TVL p. 77-79 (such a great horror moment)

Nicolas' condemnation of Lestat in TVL p. 198-201 (heartbreaking but such a watershed moment)

Lestat's recollections of Louis and Claudia in TVL p. 385-388 (THEY!!!!!!)

LOUSTAT REUNION FR THIS TIME in TVL p. 403-411 (this is the most important part of VC actually. Nothing else matters)

Lestat's rock concert in TVL p. 412-417 (he is so stupid but good for him)

Armand turning Daniel, the interviewer from IWTV, in Queen of the Damned p. 62-65 (the whole chapter this is from, The Devil's Minion, is amazing and one of the most loved parts of VC, so honestly just read it all)

Louis and Lestat visit NOLA in QotD p. 270-273 (this is where you should stop reading. Nothing is gained past this point)

Louis and Lestat express their feelings for real in Prince Lestat p. 508 (this is on my Loustat moments post, but it has to be here too)

Louis lets go of his grief and accepts happiness at the end of PL p. 518-525 (Louis was in Anne Rice character jail for almost forty years but YES YES THE TIGER IS OUT)

Louis and Lestat commit to each other permanently in Prince Lestat and the Realms of Atlantis p. 131-141 (so many incredible Loustat things packed in here. All that makes this book justified in its existence)

Louis and Lestat live happily ever after in Blood Communion p. 282-284 (If it wasn't for this after All That Shit, I would've had to smash my face into concrete)

[wickedmoonlite]

KinnPorsche Rewatch 2023

Reminder: as we go into heavier topics in KP (dub-con/non-con, toxic behaviors, etc.), I will not be doing deep dives. I’m planning on taking this just below surface value as these are literally thoughts I have in the moment as I’m watching. Thank you.

Side Story Random Thoughts

Tankhun is so dramatic here. Fake crying and the whole time giving side eye to P like "he's really buying this?"

Why is this hospital so fancy though? K is sleeping in a queen size bed for goodness sake.

Ah yes, Vegas. Here to stir shit up.

I'm on vacation he says. I'm gonna sleep alone he says. Liar. Scared of fake ghosts (actually probably not fake, most hospitals are haunted for obvious reasons).

K, I think it might be slightly obvious that P is going to stay by your side. Come on now. But thanks for giving him a phone so he can talk to Chay at least. Damn.

Sweet little ending with a cuddle ❤

Episode 7 Random Thoughts

Iconic Pete opening.

The lighting in this episode is so pretty.

Porsche and Big really just focus on a guy with an earbud... Meanwhile, another guy just strolls up with a damn grenade. Honestly.

I love how all the people there are causing a ruckus because there's a grenade up for grabs but no one fucking leaves?? They just sit there and watch??? What are y'all doing?

I dunno, beating someone into a confession probably would be difficult if the person is particularly tight lipped. But Vegas walking over with a torture case? Idk, I think I'd rather talk than be tortured...

The look that Pete gives Vegas though. Somewhat intrigued, it seems.

Did he pull out a tooth?? What is that?

Gun always trying to out wit and out maneuver his brother. He has one hell of a complex... And gave his sons a complex. And abused them. And he has too many cravats.

The red velvet shirt though.

I actually really enjoy this scene where we see how differently the minor family operates. People greeting with respect as they walk by, but they're more relaxed than the main family's people are.

Vegas walking in and out of the shadows, the lighting in general.. It's... Telling in a way. Of what kind of character Vegas puts forth for his people but also of the darkness dwelling within.

I feel like for how many people most likely live in that complex, they should have like three of those long tables set up.

Typical teenage boy with a messy room but it's just the house that's messy.

Why is K still on a saline drip at home? How long has it been since he got shot?

"But Daddy I love him!!" Honestly though, P makes K such a better person overall. Not just for their employees, but for himself. K doesn't necessarily need to be cruel to be an effective leader. I still hold that K was the worst thing to happen to P though, it turned him into someone that the old P would have hated.

Back to the single seat on the Panigale.

Vegas is more like a dad to Macau than Gun is.

Chay is all embarrassed about his room, like no my crush cannot go in there because he'll see my little shrine.

I love how easy going Kim seems to be around Chay. Compared to how we know he can be. Jeff did such a good job with him.

And then the closeup where we see the friendly demeanor drop and he goes straight back into nosy mode and walls go back up.

And then when Chay comes back, those walls come down a bit again and Kim's like damn, this boy is getting to me. I must get him to admit his crush.

It's because he's jealous, P. Always because he's jealous. K is so bad at communication and trusting P 🥴 get your shit together.

That shit eating smirk on Vegas's face. So good at sowing little seeds of distrust.

My boy Tay coming in with the best advice. And the best style.

How long has that body been there though?

Pete's out here doing the most.

I actually love that K comes to see P and gives him the lucky gun to hold onto. Nice symbolism.

"Let me show you your product." Guns ablaze. God this scene is well done. Porsche and Vegas work together surprisingly well for gun fights.

I think I've played too much Assassin's Creed, I always want to hear requiescat in pace vs reposa in pace.

The party is so well lit. All these lighting differences are so pretty.

Then Vegas trying to get Porsche to stay on with him, telling him what he thinks P wants to hear bc he's a stalker ass.

Porsche is visibly uncomfortable around Vegas in the bathroom scene. Then during the kiss pushes him away... Because he only loves Kinn.

Then Porsche hits Kinn where it hurts: I know about your ex, but only vaguely.

So hurtful, that slap was well deserved.

"I shouldn't have loved a shitty guy like you." He was trying to hit K where it hurt. And finally speaking the words that K needed to hear.

I do like how P takes back control during the NC scene. Doing sexy time on his own terms this time.

The chemistry is out of fucking control.

Consistently, the best NC scene of the series in this episode, in my humble opinion. Plus growing (my faves) KimChay's relationship :')

Episode 8 next!

[fonulyn]

I don't know if this'll make things feel better or worse but the whole remake hype train was what got me into the resi series, my new fav ship and introduced me to the original. Honestly, i've come to appreciate the original a lot more and i honestly like some parts better than the remake. (you're right hand comes off? - absolutely iconic)

I do understand how it feel when something your into for so long gets a new installment or addition that drastically changes things up in fandom. I think i'd feel exactly the same way as you if I was introduced to re4 earlier. You're feelings are perfectly valid and i'm sorry that your enjoyment of things in fandom has not quite been the same.

I am planning on using more of the og canon and stuff in some of my upcoming fanworks. I love how in fan fiction you can pick and chose the pieces you like best and create something new and exciting:) Also, although the new game is what got me into resi, seeing that original knife fight scene on yt is what got me into metaltango! Some of my favorite metaltango works i've read were either based on the og canon or came out long before the remake. So I just wanted to say that love and appreciation for the original is not completely dead, although it seems like the newer installment has taken over things a bit.

I hope you feel better soon, I know how taxing it feels to have creative or motivational slumps in life. I don't really know if there's anything to be said to make things feel better in the moment, but I've found that trying out something new or taking a break can help a bit. ♥️ (i'm not intending to give unsolicited advice or anything, these are just some or my experiences)

first off, the most important thing: "your right hand comes off?" is 100% brilliant and one of the best lines in video games ever :'D

it's absolutely awesome that the remake has gotten new people into the fandom and like i said, it's probably a really nice game with really nice characters! it's just so... everywhere right now 😅 i've been trying to blacklist it so i won't at least need to see it so much but people aren't really tagging so most of the time 90% of my dash is the remake. i think if it wasn't so in-my-face all the time i wouldn't feel so bothered by it tbh. (and i don't even remember when i last read metaltango bc it's so remake focused now, and that makes me sad)

and you're 100% right, appreciation for the original is not completely dead! which is of course very lovely. and maybe in time, things'll even out a bit, and the original will start appearing more in fandom spaces too. let's see if i manage to hang on that long :')

and thank you 💖 (don't worry, much appreciated!) you're objectively completely right that taking a break or finding new things would probably be good for me. i'm just kinda scared because the last time i "took a small fandom break" i ended up not writing a single word for over three years and i'm legit afraid it'll happen again. it'd be miserable. even moreso than i am right now anyway.

[sapphire-weapon]

ok i need to be a bitch on main for a bit because i saw a tweet that has made me go “if it weren’t for my horse” all morning and i literally cannot let it go and i just need to get it out

look man i’m hyped about FFXVI’s demo too. the set-up for the narrative is very, very strong with excellent character writing. the preview of gameplay we got is very promising.

but this is a braindead fucking take and a nonsense statement that tells on you really profoundly. tell me that you only care about spectacle without saying that you only care about spectacle.

if you compare the FFXVI opening with the FFVII opening, you actually have no business discussing video games.

FFVII’s opening was iconic because it threw you right into the game with no set-up, no context -- go do a terrorism in the flashiest way possible and don’t ask questions.

FFXVI’s opening was more or less a movie. in that two-hour opener, maybe 35 minutes of it was actual gameplay where you had freedom to move around and do stuff and not just “ok we’re going to let you walk forward for about 15 seconds so that we can say that we had player engagement in this scene.”

those are two WILDLY DIFFERENT THINGS, and i would argue that the opening of FFXVI is actually very weak because of it. there were a few different points where i was like “ok but am i actually going to get a chance to play this game at any point?” and that makes for a bad opener. joe normie picking up this game because he’s seen the hype around it might not even make it to the actual gameplay section that doesn’t even start until over an hour after the game fucking begins, because his time is limited and if the opener is this long-winded, he’s not going to want to sit through an entire game of this.

that was what TLOU1′s opening did well. it had the same flashiness and punch of FFXVI’s opener, but it took under 20 minutes to have the same impact that it took FFXVI two fucking hours to set up.

i just.

imagine fucking making a tweet like this not even three months after RE4make released. RE4 opening with the village fight actually is one of the strongest openers in a video game ever, and it was a huge reason why OG was so successful. RE4′s opener actually was the best opener for a game since FFVII, and people made that point repeatedly when OG released.

you know what other game got praised for doing this? DMC3. you know what DMC3 also did? throw you right into the game in the flashiest, most exciting way possible.

you know what other game got this praise, as well? uncharted 2. take a fucking guess how uncharted 2 opened.

if the FFXVI demo was a pilot for a show, it would be hailed as one of the best first episodes of a show ever. but FFXVI isn’t a fucking TV show. it’s a fucking video game. and as a game, its opening is really, really weak, and it honestly might kill my desire to replay it in the future.

so let’s not sit here and let hype for a story completely blank out all of our cognitive processes and make dumbass, bullshit fucking nonsense statements like this. it’ll hurt the game in the long run by setting people’s expectations to something that they’re not going to get.

[radellama]

Magus and/or Flea

Magus

First impression

Ohhhh big cape evil dude with one of the coolest boss themes I've ever heard!?

Impression now

Favorite moment

Sighhhhh there's so many... When you really look at him he has such nuance and everything is linked and I LOVE thinking about him (been almost 15 years lol...) It's really hard to just pick one. For now, let's just say his iconic line

Idea for a story

Men of Mystics

For real tho, I've wanted to do a cool horror/creepy pasta type story about Magus in relation to the black wind. I just don't know how to get the really good feeling out into words or art so it's been a few years in the back of my mind. Just something about being so young and losing your mum to the black winds, and watching your sister slowly succumb to the same thing, all before you start to hear it yourself... Yeah, I wish I had in inspiration to pull it off how I want

Unpopular opinion

A vast majority of the fandom reduce him to a gross and/or incorrect flanderization of self. That, or glossing over him entirely, when he adds so much to the narrative of ct as a whole. I still see fucking terrible takes on him as recently as 2022 lol and it makes me a bit sad. I know my interpretations won't be to everyone's liking but I've put effort into looking into him (and most the ct cast as a whole) and picking up the subtle things that are laid out right there in the source material. Looking only at him (or anyone for that matter) PURELY through a fandom lens gets tiring for me to see sometimes...

Favorite relationship

HARLAND

FOR REAL THO, ALL THESE YEARS LATER AND HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH SCHALA IS STILL SO NICE.... EVEN THO most of that relationship is his one sided view on it, he still dedicated most of his life working to try and avenge/save her. It's strong enough that it prevailed through to both sequels (to varying degrees and missed opportunities 🙄) because he just cared that much. Even when he's a grown man, he's still that little kid who's sad cause he misses his sister!!!!

Favorite headcanon

That the use of magic changes your appearance. I had a whole theory about hair colour and magical affinity, which explains why Magus has such a beautiful icy blue colour. It also explains why his ears got pointy, and I like to further that by imagining that he overall looks very sharp and angular, as much as a human can. I try to express that with most art I make of him, I know he's really hot and even if it's so subtle most will miss it, I try to keep him looking sharp.

///

Flea

First impression

WOAH WE'RE FIGHTING IN THE STARS!!!

(fun fact, flea was one of my very first glimpses of ct, before my very own playthrough I used to sit with my dad in his office and watch him play, and he was going through Magus' castle one of the first time I watched him!)

Impression now

EPIC NB TRANS MASC KING!!!

Favorite moment

Idea for a story

Hmm... Honestly, a lot of the stuff I wanted to explore for him (+the other generals) is gong into men of mystics. I've always just wanted to kinda explore the behind the scenes lives of everyone leading up to the war in 600ad, and that's exactly what men of mystics is - all that boring stuff, but harland is there :p

Unpopular opinion

Flea is not trans fem. Let trans mascs have this one, he literally says 'hey, I'm a guy'

I'm not saying this as a dig at trans fems, if they see something in him and connect with him that way I love to see it - I'm saying as a trans masc myself who often feels like people hear the word 'trans' and think it only means 'trans woman,' let us have this one and respect the masc despite appearing androgynous/feminine, I talked about it a little while ago here

Favorite relationship

Honestly? With slash and ozzie. I'm soooo interested in how the dynamic between the three of them plays out, I love thinking about the antics they'd get up to while they were rising to general status

Favorite headcanon

Honestly not so much a hc but more trying to bring back the aspects of Flea that were lost through translation. Mainly the amazing pun on his name making him talk real flirty. I wish there was a way we could have all the little nuances brought over to eng, I could talk about them all day....

[mbarrcra]

𝙎𝘾𝙍𝙀𝘼𝙈 𝙌𝙐𝙀𝙀𝙉𝙎 𝙋𝘼𝙉𝙀𝙇 : 𝙈𝙀𝙇𝙄𝙎𝙎𝘼 𝘽𝘼𝙍𝙍𝙀𝙍𝘼

Can you tell us about the character(s) you have played?

“Think it’s pretty safe to say most people know me from portraying Sam Carpenter in the latest Scream films, she’s a protective older sister and the daughter of a serial killer, a total wild card. And most recently I had the honor of portraying Joey in Abigail, a woman with a dark past who, along with a group of fellow criminals, accidentally kidnap a ballerina vampire who is thirsty for blood.”

Who would be your dream final girl to team up with?

“Already hitting me with the hard questions, I see. Oh my god, there’s so many iconic final girls I love and adore, including all three of these beautiful and badass women sitting up here. The ultimate dream? All of us together in a project.”

Do you think you would be able to survive a horror movie?

“Honestly? No! I mean, I guess it mostly depends on the situation? Like, if I had to face off with a scary clown… well, I’d probably just faint on the spot but I might be able to survive a day or two in a zombie apocalypse or something.”

What is the most interesting part of making a horror movie come to life?

“I’ve learned filming a horror movie is kind of like being on a playground with your siblings and friends. Like, that level of imagination and having to pretend to be scared and scream your heart out is kind of ridiculous if you want to be rational about it so you really have to let go and let your inner child kind of come out and be fearless and do all these crazy things that horror requires. It’s just always the best time, I absolutely love it.”

What horror scream queens from the past inspired you?

“Jamie Lee Curtis is kind of the goat, right? The ultimate scream queen who paved the way for the rest of us.”

What did you to unwind after a day of intense scenes?

“All the dog cuddles and a relaxing playlist.”

Would you like your movie(s) to get a sequel? If so, where do you see your character going? 

“Listen, I’ve been begging Matt and Tyler for an Abigail sequel and even pitched a few different ideas, but I think Abigail and Joey teaming up and kicking vampire ass would be an absolute blast.”

Would you ever return to making another horror movie/series?

“Oh, absolutely. I don’t think I’ll be able to get away from horror, and I also don’t want to. It’s become a genre I’ve really grown to love and one that has fully embraced me, which I’m extremely grateful for.”