#honestly glad that a f/f won one of these

[yugioh-rare-pair-poll]

Congratulations Scryshipping!!! You're the winner of the Yugioh 5Ds Rare Pair Poll!!!

Round 4: Final Round

Propaganda under the cut

Pairing 1: Ushio/Mikage

Propaganda: They're so rare they don't even have a ship name

Pairing 2: Scryshipping (Misty Lola | Misty Tredwell/Sherry  LeBlanc)

Propaganda: Two beautiful women with tragic pasts of loss that made them mistrustful and angry and who were not given enough love in the show. They both give big lesbian energy so I really think they should get to be in the same room together and kiss about their feelings

Now, let’s keep things civil. This is a silly poll where we can share why we love our overlooked ships. There’s no need to be nasty to prove your point. Bashers will be consumed by the earthen gods.

[elllisaaa]

TEACHER'S PET - J. YUNHO

SUMMARY : being a fan of Jane Austen's novels, you should have guessed that your attraction for complicated love stories would put you in trouble at some point. but you wouldn't have imagined that the trouble in question would be named Jeong Yunho - your favourite professor.

-> pairing : literature professor!yunho x student fem!reader

-> words count : 30.4 k

-> genre : college au, smut & angst

-> warnings (w. some spoilers of the plot) : soft!dom!yunho x sub!reader, teasing, dirty talk, praising, marking, hair pulling, doggy, protected and unprotected sex, creampie, body worship, use of 'good girl' and 'slut', oral (f. and m. receiving), deep throating, cum play, manhandling, fingering, begging, riding, semi-public sex, yunho has a big cock, hand kink, facefucking, drunk sex, yunho is calling reader angel (yes, that's a warning), age gap (8 years), mention of fwb relationship w. san, cheating, mentions of family issues, self-depreciation

+ the way i'm depicting yunho does not represent him, it's only a work of fiction.

-> 18+ content bellow, minors dni

-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated ! sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language

-> author's note : should i say sorry for the enormous word count ? maybe. will i apologize ? not at all because i'm so fucking proud of this fic. it might be one of my favourite things i've ever written, i quite fell in love with reader this time lmaoo. i started the process of the plot back in january, and it took me more than 3 months to write this but it's amazing in my opinion, so i hope you'll like it as much as i loved writting it ! also that is such a detail but yes, prices are in euros in this fic because i'm french and i cannot physically write dollars and not feel weird, i'm sorry, bear with it. i should also say sorry for the angst but it don't wanna either, i already cried to myself when i put it into words, it's your turn to suffer.

-> playlist : older by isabel larosa - white mustang by lana del ray - crazy in love by sofia carlberg - middle of the night by elley duhé - reflections by the neighborhood - daddy issues by the neighborhood - babydoll by ari abdul - easier by bernard park - i love you by billie eilish

-> masterlist | ateez masterlist

Jeong Yunho had been the big sensation and the object of all conversations since he started teaching at your university. It was during your freshman year that he joined your college as the new professor of British literature. And honestly, just knowing that you wouldn’t be forced to listen to an old man repeating the same story about how he almost won the Pulitzer Prize twenty years ago over and over was already a relief. But the fact that your new teacher was also very attractive did get you even more interested in his classes. 

Of course, at first, you were like all the other girls on campus, gushing over how handsome Mr. Jeong was, and how well the suits he always wore were perfectly fitting his tall frame. But you quickly discovered a dedicated and very good professor. He helped your whole promotion to go over all the things your old teacher should have presented to you, and thanks to him, you passed your exams. So even if you couldn’t ignore that he was very, very hot, you were mostly glad to have a professor as passionate as you about literature - his handsomeness was only the cherry on top. 

Every time you had a class with him, you knew that this was about to be a good day, because they were always stimulating and never boring. And maybe, just maybe it was because you were always trying to contradict him. In your defense, Mr. Jeong always led you to approach a new subject with an interesting or controversial point of view, and you were often disagreeing, or had things to say about it. And since not many people in your class were really interested in British literature and were only here to admire your teacher for one or two hours, it was not rare for him and you to end up debating about anything and everything. And today was no exception.

“- What do you want me to say Y/N ? This is how things are, I can’t change them.

- Then you’ll have to convince me, Mr. Jeong.”

Your professor chuckled while shaking his head. You were always like this, always trying to get him to surrender and admit that you had the right answer. Yunho didn’t really understand if it was because you liked to be right or simply because you loved a little bit of challenge, but either way, he appreciated how attentive you were to his classes, and how you were trying to question everything every single time. It was stimulating for the class, for you, and even for him. 

“- In this precise case, it is not my job to do that. The fact that you have your opinion on the subject is a very good thing, but there is no right or wrong answer. What we are trying to do here is simply to interpret what message Poe wanted to convey, we can never be sure if our interpretation is the one he had in mind. And I would love to continue this debate but it’s time for you to go, so don’t forget to read the extract of Wuthering Heights I gave you and I’ll see you next week.” 

You rapidly packed up your things to run back to your dorms. Friday often meant a girl’s night out with your two best friends, and you wanted to have enough time to get ready. You three always got to the same bar where you met each other, one of the first nights you went out during your first year of college. You crossed paths with Lola first, the barmaid having messed up both of your cocktail orders. And both of you clicked instantly, despite her being two years older than you. At one point, while you were dancing together, you noticed a girl alone being clearly annoyed by a guy who repeatedly tried to touch her. So your new friend and you acted like you knew her and forced the guy to go away. It turned out that the girl you had kind of saved, Dia, was in the same major as you. You ended up spending the night all together and you kept in touch after that.

And despite Lola having finished her studies before Dia and you, she stayed around the city because of her work. So once in a while, you took the opportunity to go out at the bar where you met. And tonight was one of those nights, and after the exhausting week you had, you kinda needed it anyway. Your roommate, Dajeong, helped choose your outfit and you got ready together because she was also going out with some of her friends, chatting about your days and the new rumours about the basketball team. And of course, you had to dress up a little, putting on a skimpy, little black dress that did wonders to underline the curves of your body. During these concert nights you were going to, there were always a lot of pretty attractive men playing instruments, and that kinda got you going. So you didn’t put away the thought of finishing the night in someone else’s bed. 

Dia picked you up to go to the bar where you joined Lola and immediately ordered your favourite drink. It felt good to finally rest after the awful week you had. It all started on Monday, when you slept in and missed your first class of the morning. And because you had to rush to the second, you forgot your lunch at home and the charger of your laptop. On Thursday, you forgot about the work session you had with some of your classmates for a group project and arrived late. And finally one of your professors claimed to be disappointed in you because you handed him your assignment one hour late because you had an unplanned class at the due date. So yeah, you really needed this drink with your friends. 

“- So I didn’t warn you beforehand, but I’m gonna sing on stage tonight !”

You looked at Lola, dumfounded, while Dia squealed excitedly beside you. Your older friend had tried to make her music known for the past year and it was finally starting to work out for her. Lola was incredibly talented, so you were certain that she would succeed and you were also very very happy for her, a big smile stretching your lips as you gave her a hug.

“- Girl ! That’s incredible ! I’m so proud of you, you deserve it !”

Dia joined your hug, the three of you giggling.

“-  I’m so fucking exited, we were waiting for it !”

It was still a little early, but the bar was already filled with people, and even if it was still pretty cold outside, you were immediately hit by a wave of heat as soon as you stepped in. You really loved the atmosphere of these kinds of nights, where everyone was friendly because they were only there to spend a good time. Lola had to go backstage to get ready, but you quickly stumbled on some of Dia’s friends with whom you talked for a while and since the vibes matched, you decided to stay together to enjoy the concert. One guy had particularly tried to get your attention, and you weren’t mad about it with how good he looked. He was very tall, and could seem intimidating but whenever he smiled or laughed, you could see how kind and sweet he was. While he was saying something to one of his friends, you quickly tapped on Dia’s shoulder.

“- Hey, what’s the name of your friend that’s very tall ?”

She answered you with a smirk, and mischievous glint in his eyes when she leaned towards you.

“- Why ? Does he interest you ?

- Maybe. So ?

- His name’s Mingi. Have fun girl.”

You slapped her arm lightly, rolling your eyes at her comment. But truly, you didn’t mind the playful bantering between the two of you, loving it even. You let her go back to her conversation while you offered yourself and Mingi another drink since you had finished your beer long ago. It happened that Mingi was just as interesting as you thought he would be, and you even spent the first few performances of the night simply talking with him, too immersed in the discussion to acknowledge your surroundings. It’s only when Lola got up on stage that you started to pay attention, cheering for her after she introduced herself to the public. 

And honestly, she nailed it, hyping the crowd like she did that for her whole life. Dia and you surely clapped and screamed for her the loudest. Lola came to you as soon as she got off the stage, hugging both of you and thanking you for coming to see her and cheering for her. She looked the happiest when she was singing, and you couldn’t be more proud of her as all of Dia’s friends were congratulating and praising her. And from this point on, you didn’t have many clear memories, only knowing that you got drink after drink, getting more comfortable with each one. 

Usually, you wouldn’t be all over someone you had just met, but Mingi was really a good guy, he was attractive and you were drunk, so you didn’t mind the way he was kissing you shamelessly, only kissing him back and letting him roam his hands all over your body. But as always when you were tipsy, your mind was jumping from one thing to another. It didn’t matter that you couldn’t see neither Lola nor Dia around anymore, all you wanted was another drink right now.

“- I’m gonna get one more beer, want one ?”

Mingi tried to stop you when you got up, stumbling a little while standing on your feet, the world spinning all around you.

“- Don’t you think you already drank enough Y/N ?

- You’re cute worrying about me ! I’m okay ! I’ll be back in a minute !”

You were practically screaming, and even with the loud music and voices of people around you, you were very loud, making your way over to the bar while chuckling to yourself the whole time. You dropped onto one of the stools in front of the bar, ordering yourself another beer. It’s only when you turned your head on your right side that you noticed someone you knew quite well. 

“- Mr. Jeong !”

The said Mr. Jeong was straddled by your loud voice and even more by your body colliding with his as you kind of dropped your weight on him, circling him with your arms as if you were trying to hug him. For a few seconds, your teacher remained frozen in place, not knowing how to react, before his brain seemed to reactivate again, and pushed you off of him, holding you by your shoulders. Only a quick look at your flushed cheeks, lazy smile and glossy eyes was enough for him to guess that you were drunk. 

“- Y/N ? 

- That’s me ! What are you doing here though ? Teachers are not supposed to go out !”

Yunho couldn’t help but laugh quietly at your behaviour. You were always so neat and put together during his classes, always so focused and organised. So to see you let loose like this, wearing a skimpy little dress, obviously very drunk and your speech so slurred it was actually hard to understand you, was really a shock. 

“- You’ll be surprised to know that I have a life outside of being your teacher.”

Yunho knew that he shouldn’t find the pout on your lips cute, but he did. 

“- ‘m not surprised, you too hot to be a teacher.”

He blamed the alcohol for the way his heart started beating faster at your comment, and even more when you leaned against him once again, breathing in his scent. 

“- ‘m so tired… 

- Where are your friends ? Maybe they can get you home.

- Don’t know…”

You were starting to feel really dizzy. And not the kind of daze when you’re just feeling the agreable effects of all the drinks you had, it was the kind of daze when you’re starting to feel bad, when your head starts to hurt and all you want is your bed and silence. Yunho tried to observe the crowd and spot the friends he usually saw you hanging with around campus, but no one was in sight. So he stood up, paying for his last drink, before helping you walk towards the exit. 

“- Where we going ?

- I’m driving you home. You’re clearly drunk and you lost your friends, it’s not safe for you to stay here alone.” 

You were too far gone to be embarrassed about your behaviour, or to resist too much, so you let your professor drag you to his car and help you get inside, even buckling up your seat belt for you. You only find it in yourself to give him your address, and text Dia to warn her that you were getting home before dozing off. Yunho had to wake you up when he parked in front of your dorm. 

“- We’re here, Y/N.”

You whined, claiming you were comfortable and didn’t want to move, that it was cold outside and the heat in his car was far much better. Yunho sighed while getting out of the car. Helping one of his drunk students get home was not really on his bingo card of the week, but he couldn’t risk you getting in a dangerous situation. He opened the car door on your side after having taken off his jacket, handing it to you as he helped you get out of the vehicle. No words were exchanged as you put on the black leather jacket that was obviously ten times too big for you, drowning your silhouette inside of it. But you could feel the warmth that Yunho’s body had left, and it made the cold of the wind outside less chilly. 

“- You will be alright to get inside alone ?”

You nobbed your head, the nap you took during the way back to your dorm having sobered you up a little. Now, all you wanted was to wrap yourself in your sheets because you were starting to feel the second-hand embarrassment of this whole situation. 

“- Thank you Mr. Jeong.

- You’re welcome Y/N, drink water and take a lot of rest, okay ?”

You nobbed once again, feeling your cheeks heating up when he pressed your shoulder lightly. You didn’t find anything to answer so you decided to simply get inside, not seeing how Yunho kept an eye on you until he was sure you got inside, and only did he drive off. When you pushed the door open, Dajeong was not back from her party yet, so you were met with a silence that instantly eased your headache. You rummaged through the drawers of the kitchen to find some painkillers and a glass of water, gulping the medication down before heading straight to your room. You hadn’t the energy to take off your makeup, nor your outfit, slipping in bed with Yunho’s jacket still on. But it smelled good, it was so warm, like a little cocoon you loved to be wrapped into. And maybe that was why you dreamed of him that night.

The days after this hell of a night, you were hit with the most terrible feeling of embarrassment and guilt you’ve ever felt. Embarrassment because it was definitely what you should feel after having to be driven home by one of your teachers because you were too drunk, and at that, a very attractive and smart teacher - and also your favourite one. Also to be seen in a state like this by him had you mortified. You always tried to remain serious and professional in front of Mr. Jeong, and you never wanted your personal life to interfere like that with your studies. Guilt because he was certainly there to enjoy his own night out and you wrecked that by forcing him to look after you like a little child. You even threw a tantrum because it was too cold, and every time you saw the jacket you even had the audacity to sleep into, you felt even more bad and ashamed of yourself. You didn’t even dare tell Dia and Lola who helped you get home, claiming it was only a guy you knew. 

You also didn’t want rumors to spread. They were fast to go around students, and if you handed Mr. Jeong his jacket back after his class, it would have been enough for people to believe that you two were in a relationship. So you decided to go and see him after his classes in his office, to be sure that you wouldn’t be bothered. You had buried his jacket at the bottom of your bag, as if everyone had X-Ray vision and could see what was inside, walking as fast as you could through the hallways. You had done nothing wrong, but it still felt like it and you had to mentally prepare yourself for the conversation that was going to happen. 

The door was open when you arrived at his office, but you still knocked on it lightly to signal your presence. Mr. Jeong immediately looked up from the assignments he was grading, smiling when he saw it was only you.

“- Come on in Y/N, and close the door behind you.”

You were fairly unable to utter a word, sticking to nodding your head as you did what he told you. Usually, when you came to his office, you would immediately sit down, but you didn’t feel at ease at all today, too shameful to even look at Mr. Jeong in the eyes. 

“- Do you feel better than this weekend ? You didn’t seem very well yesterday either.”

The fact that he was still worrying about you was making you feel even more uncomfortable. 

“- Uh, yes, thank you. Actually I came by to apologise for my behaviour. I was very drunk, and I didn’t know what I was doing anymore. Thank you so much for driving me home, and again, I’m sorry for how I acted and if I said anything disrespectful to you. And here’s your jacket, I washed it for you. And again, I’m so, so sorry.”

You got the jacket out of your bag, putting it on his desk, neatly folded. Your heart was beating unsteady and your breathing was loud. You couldn’t even remember if you actually said anything weird to him, but knowing you and how you had no filter when you were wasted, you surely did. Mr. Jeong stood up to get his jacket back, hanging it on the back of his desk chair. The smile on his lips was reassuring and sweet, and he didn’t seem mad at all, but you couldn’t help the anxiousness from taking over you.

“- It’s not that bad, it has already happened to everyone to be drunk and do stupid things, believe it or not, it happened to me too.

- To bother your teacher because you were completely wasted ?”

Yunho chuckled at your remark, and he was happy to see a small smile spread on your face too. You were always trying to not look him in the eyes since the beginning of the week, and you seemed very embarrassed when Yunho didn’t want you to be. He did that out of kindness, because you were one of his favourite students and also because he couldn’t let you alone when you were in this state, he couldn’t have looked at himself in a mirror if he had let you without anyone to look after you when you were so vulnerable. 

“- Maybe not, but you get my point. It didn’t bother me, and you didn’t say anything strange, don’t worry. We can just forget all about that if you prefer, but I can assure you that you did not do anything wrong Y/N, I’m just happy I was able to get you home safely.”

Your shoulders immediately relaxed, and it was as if you could breathe more easily. You knew that your professor was honest, that he wouldn’t lie to you about something like that. 

“- Thank you so much for taking care of me. I gotta go for my next class now, but really, I’m very grateful Mr. Jeong.

- No problem, just be more careful next time.

- Of course. Have a good day !”

He greeted you back, watching as you left his office and closed the door behind you. And finally, Yunho allowed himself to slump back in his desk chair, sighing loudly. He didn’t lie to you, didn’t tell you that to make you feel better. Except the fact that you did say that you found him hot. That compliment really messed up with his mind. You were always so serious and focused during his classes, and of course, it was obvious you wouldn’t spend your weekends locked up in your room, but seeing you like this was so new, so unusual. The way you looked at him, the way you touched him, the way your dress was riding your thighs up, the way his jacket was now smelling like your intoxicating perfume - the scent of you invading the room little by little. Everything about this was making him see you in a whole different light. 

The only thing Yunho promised himself when he became a professor was to never, ever, find one of his students attractive. Maybe it was because he was young, and much closer to your age when he started teaching, and that he quickly noticed the eyes some of the girls were giving him. Anyway, he swore on his dignity and morals that he would never have this type of thoughts about a student. But now that he got to see you in your skimpy black dress, which was hugging every one of your curves perfectly, while looking him in the eyes and confessing how hot he was may have him reconsidering his decision.

He knew he shouldn’t see you this way, he knew he shouldn’t search your profile on instagram, knew that he shouldn’t look at your photos nor check you out in your pretty little outfits that you loved to post. But he did it anyway, scrolling through your account as if he was a teenager all over again. And when he stumbled over the photos you posted this summer, body on display in your little bikinis, he knew he had to stop before his thoughts started to drift to places he shouldn’t. Because it was dirty, it was disgusting and he shouldn’t think about you, his student, this way. This should have been enough to stop his mind from going back to this night, but it didn’t. And Yunho felt incredibly bad for not being able to control himself.

You felt a little better since your conversation with Mr. Jeong, reassured that you did not say anything weird to him, and that you haven’t made him uncomfortable. That didn’t ease your mind from the fact that you slept in his jacket and even had the nerves to feel cosy because you were surrounded by his scent. But you tried your best to forget it all, just like he advised you to, even if you had to be honest and admit that you did often think about the way he held you by your waist when he helped you walk to his car. 

You shook your head as you tried to concentrate back on the synopsis of the book you had in hand right now. You decided to go to a book shop with Dia this afternoon after your classes. It was something you loved to do together from time to time, always promising yourself that you won’t buy anything but coming back home with at least one new book anyway. You were not paying attention to your surroundings, entirely focused on the book you were looking at, and you didn’t feel it when someone came up behind you. 

“- I see that you’re very dedicated to my classes Y/N.”

You turned around quickly, not needing to see him to recognize the familiar voice of your teacher. He was standing there, dressed more casually than the usual suits he was always wearing for class, only in black pants and a creamy sweater. You tried not to make the blush on your face obvious as you composed yourself before answering. 

“- Well, your recommendations are always great Mr. Jeong, so I might listen to you once again. But only if it gets me one bonus point on my next assignment.”

Yunho couldn’t help the cheeky smile that spreaded on his face whenever you teased him. It wasn’t the behaviour students should have towards their teacher, but he liked it too much to ask you to stop. 

“- You know very well that I don’t get corrupted this easily. 

- And if I bring you some chocolate ?

- Then I might reconsider your proposal.”

You were ready to add something when you were interrupted by the loud ringtone of your phone. You excused yourself and turned around to answer the call. Yunho didn’t mean to eavesdrop on your conversation with a certain “Sannie”, but at the same time, if it was that private, you would’ve walked away, right ? He wondered if you were used to giving surnames like that to every one of your friends or if this guy could be your boyfriend. But why would that interest him in the first place anyway ? It wasn’t like he cared if you were single or taken. And it was none of his business, but still, the question slipped past his lips when you hung up. 

“- Was that your boyfriend ?

- Oh, no, not at all ! San is my best friend, he has been since we were kids.”

Yunho only nodded, already feeling the second-hand embarrassment of asking such a personal and inappropriate question. He needed to get out of here so you didn’t notice the way his ears were heating up, and you gave him the perfect opportunity to do just that. 

“- I have to go but I’ll get this one. 

- Feel free to share your thoughts about it. 

- I’ll do it, thank you. Have a good day Mr. Jeong. 

- You too Y/N.”

And you left with a warm smile, asking yourself if you would have a stranger interaction than this one in your life. How come that one of the most handsome men you’ve ever met, who also happened to be your teacher, wanted to know about your love life ? You didn’t know how to handle this fact, didn’t know why he asked you that either. But it was messing with your head, making you think about things you shouldn’t, about things you never even considered before this night. Well, that was a bit of lying to yourself. Because you did think about him in this light before, did dream about him touching you in such inappropriate ways for a teacher and his student. But you pushed these thoughts away, not ready to dig into why he was making you feel like that and wouldn’t leave your mind.  

And Yunho couldn’t help thinking the same : how he didn’t see you like that before having you all pliant in his hold, before seeing you wearing your little black dress, before hearing you calling him hot. But if he was honest with himself, he did think that you were pretty during the first class you had with him. He did think on numerous occasions that you were smart and the kind of person he would love to go out with. But he couldn’t. Because he was your teacher, and because he was a lot much older than you. It would be inappropriate. 

Even with all of these considerations in mind, Yunho couldn’t stop himself from stealing glances at you every time you stepped a foot into his classroom. He tried to be as subtle as possible because he didn't want to make this situation even weirder than it already was, especially for you. Little did he know you did the same, observing him every time he wasn’t looking your way, struggling to not blush whenever you felt his eyes on you. And Yunho kept telling himself that he couldn’t do that, that it was not right to look at you the way he did, to think about the things he was thinking about every time his eyes landed on you. But he couldn’t stop it. It felt wrong, but for some kind of reason, he was unable to forget about you. 

“- Did the Mr. Jeong hype finally get to your head ?”

You wiped your head towards Dia, heart beating unsteady. She couldn’t know about what happened almost three weeks ago, right ? No she couldn't have guessed, except maybe if someone saw him driving you home. But your friend only chuckled and slapped your arm when she saw the defeated expression on your face.

“- You look like you saw a ghost ! It’s alright bestie, I wouldn’t judge you for finding him handsome, it’s a fact everyone already established.

- Why are you saying that now ?

- Because you’ve become very distracted whenever we have classes with him, and you don’t participate as much as before. Is it because you finally see him like we all do ?”

You groaned and shook your head, but Dia was too close to the truth to not unsettle you. You knew that you did nothing wrong, that it was normal to think that your obviously very attractive teacher was, in fact, very attractive. But you couldn’t kill the guilt creeping in every time you looked at his hands handing back the papers a little too long, or when you caught yourself wondering if his skin smelt as good as his leather jacket did. 

“- First, I’ve never said that he isn’t good looking, and second, I have enough decency to not drool over him during said classes.”

Lie. It was a complete lie. But Dia didn’t need to know that. She didn’t need to know that your professor had invaded your thoughts in a way you didn’t think would be possible, and in a way that was definitely not appropriate. 

“- Decency doesn’t exist when he enters the equation.”

She was not entirely wrong, but you couldn’t let her win, because it would be like admitting to yourself that you did thirst over your teacher, more than you would like to. Luckily for you, Yunho quickly started his class and strangely enough, for the first time since the bar incident, you succeeded in following everything he was saying and not getting too distracted by his hands, or by his smile. 

“- Before I let you go, I wanted to inform you that I decided to create a debate club. I’m aware of what you must all think about these : that they are boring and never pick the subjects you want to discuss. That’s why you’ll be the ones to propose the subjects we will tackle, and you’ll be free to talk about anything you want. It can be music, politics, literature - anything. As long as you respect each others’ opinions, it’s okay for me. If you’re interested, write your name on the sheet on my desk before leaving and that’s all for today. Thank you for your attention, and have a good day.”

Conversations about Mr. Jeong’s propositions were already erupting all around the classroom. You spotted some serious students you already had study sessions with writing down their names, and a bunch of girls who just wanted to check out the teacher for one more hour per week. Dia already warned you that she didn’t have the time to engage in such activities, but you thought it couldn’t be that bad of an idea. After all, you really loved to discuss with people, and this was the perfect occasion to do so. And no, it was not because your professor will be there. Not at all. It only happened that he will animate the whole thing, it was only a coincidence. You got a pen out of your bag and started to write down your name when his now familiar voice interrupted you.

“- I could’ve bet on this.”

You didn’t dare lift your head and meet his gaze, because locking eyes with him in class was one thing - he was far away from you - but having him so close to you suddenly made you nervous. 

“- Am I so predictable ?

- A little, but I’m not complaining. I know that at least one person will actually come and that I will not be alone.”

This time, you had no other choice but to look at him as you had finished writing your name and had no excuse to look at the piece of paper anymore. You knew you shouldn’t feel like this, but your heart still missed a beat when your eyes finally dived into his. You quickly avoided his gaze, pretending to put your pen back in your bag while you searched in your brain to offer him a clever response. 

“- You know me, I’m always here when it comes to debating. 

- I wouldn’t have expected less from you Y/N.”

The way he said your name shouldn’t have made you blush, but it did. You rapidly excused yourself before literally running away from the classroom and all these feelings that shouldn’t invade your mind. It even made you hesitate on your decision to join the debate club. But you didn’t want Mr. Jeong to think that you were not serious. So you went anyway. And even if, as you predicted, not that many people showed up, you still had a good time. You were even able to not think about him in ways you shouldn’t too often. That was until he insisted on giving you all his personal phone number, so he could organise things more easily and give you the opportunity to see museums or expositions you could later discuss on. That was a perfectly sensible decision, obviously.

However, that night when you laid in your bed and couldn’t fall asleep, your fingers hovered over his contact. It was stupid to even think about it. Why would you even send him a text ? And to say what ? Ask him if he had a good day ? Or if he planned anything for the next reunion ? It was stupid, yeah. But you were one click away from sending a text. You threw your phone to the other side of your bed, running your hands over your face. You were so stupid. Stupid for thinking about Jeong Yunho as anything else than your teacher, stupid for thinking that he would even look your way, stupid for thinking that you were any different from all the girls who were swooning over him. You were just like them and even worse. 

The next meeting with the debate club came too quickly for your liking as you were not mentally prepared enough to see the teacher you couldn’t help thinking about all day long. But this was not what occupied your mind today. No. It was this one girl who thought that she was always right just because she said so. Ever since Mr. Jeong announced that the subject was going to be about music and the sense of community it could create, she hadn't shut up, interrupting everyone as if her opinion was more important. And she wouldn’t stop whining about the fact that music was too commercial these days and that there was nothing original anymore, when her playlist was essentially composed of trending songs and Taylor Swift (not that you had something against the girl, you loved some of her songs, but she was far from not being commercial.) And when you tried to argue that, no, music was not only commercial, that there were still good artists and groups that did it because they truly enjoyed and loved making music, she would get mad. Everytime someone else would defend your point of view, she would accuse them of teaming up against her. 

And you were actually a little mad at your teacher for not jumping in and telling something to this girl who was clearly being unreasonable. You ended up saying that you didn’t want to talk anymore, because even if you were not one to give up, you clearly noticed that you couldn’t win this time. You spent the rest of the debate sulking and stealing glances at Mr. Jeong, who was just observing the chaos. You didn’t understand why he would not intervene, and yes, you got that he wanted to let everyone express their opinions, but was it relevant in this case ? You packed up your things rather quickly ; this whole situation put you into a bad mood, and you just wanted to forget it. 

“- Y/N ? Are you alright ?”

His voice straddled you as he came closer to you, letting all the other students go out behind the two of you.

“- Oh, uh, yeah, I’m good. Just a little frustrated, but it’s alright.

- I understand, but this moment is also made for that, even if you’re not agreeing with her, you have to respect it. 

- I know, I don’t have a problem with her not being on my side, I just don’t like it when people victimise themselves to make me feel bad and let them have the last word. That’s not what a debate is about.”

You tried to stay focused on your bottle of water in your hands, and to not stare at him too much. He was wearing one of his black suits once more, and even more since the bar incident, it was doing something to you. 

“- Well, I can’t say you’re wrong, but not everyone here is as mature as you are. You have to take it into consideration. And it is by talking with people like you that people like her will get it and grow up.”

You shrugged, turning your head to the side because you couldn’t hold his gaze anymore. You knew deep down that he was right, but you were too frustrated to admit it right now. 

“- I’ll let you sleep on that Y/N, but don’t let it deter you from coming next time, your interventions are important and I value them. A lot.”

You nodded before saying your goodbyes and quite literally running away from him, once again. He couldn’t make you feel so frustrated you wanted to break something, and the next second made your heart beat like crazy. Because his words surely did. You knew by the way he was often relying on your answers in class that he must appreciate you as a student, but to be aware that he also liked who you were as a person was something else. It was getting bad, really bad, because you couldn’t keep under control the feelings he made appear in you. And you knew it was wrong, knew that he was your teacher, knew that he probably - surely - didn’t feel the same, but you were already in too deep. 

And Yunho couldn’t help thinking the same as he watched you go away. He shouldn’t feel such attraction for his students, and he shouldn’t try to get closer to you, and he shouldn’t try to do all these things that led you to be alone with him. But still, he chose the next subject because he knew he would get a reaction out of you, because he knew it would get you all passionate about it and he loved when you were like this. 

He didn’t miss his shot because you were the first to talk when he announced that today’s session will be about Jane Austen and feminism. Yunho knew she was one of your favourite authors as you often quoted her in your assignments and used her novels as examples, so he was even aware of your opinion on them. Thus as he was regularly doing during his classes, he decided to go against your views, just to see how you would react. It was wrong to do it only to see you get passionate and involved and slightly mad at him - because you both knew that he already told you that he agreed with your ideas. 

“- I understand what you’re saying Y/N, but the fact that Austen never got married but still insisted on talking about marriage in every one of her novels could also show that it was a dream of hers, and not feminism.”

Again, you were feeling so frustrated against your teacher. But this time, it was directed straight to him. You couldn’t figure out why he would do this, nor why he was so dedicated to debating with you in particular, and not with all the other students that were agreeing with you. 

“- On this aspect, her personal life has nothing to do with it. On the contrary, it reinforces what she’s showing. In Pride and Prejudice for example, Lizzie doesn’t accept Darcy’s proposal until he changes and really proves that he loves her. Plus Darcy doesn’t do all these things so she would agree to marry him, he does it only because he loves her truly. She depicts marriage as something you should do out of love, the only happy marriages in her novels are the ones where the two parties are in love with each other. Like Jane and Bingley, and you can contrast with Lydia and Wickham and how their union is never shown as a good thing, for either them or the Bennets’. I think she never got married because she despised the men of her era, and that they wouldn’t meet her expectations, because she wanted a marriage of love, not of arrangement, or relationships or money. That’s why she is showing them so much in her books, because it reflects how she didn’t like the view on marriages during the Victorian era and the sexism she was surely enduring because of her being a writer and not trying to hide it.”

You barely breathed in between your sentences, and when you finally stopped talking, you felt like you just ran a marathon. Mr. Jeong’s gaze never left yours as you spoke, and the intensity of it was making butterflies come alive in your stomach. It was as if you could feel the tension emanating from him, from his eyes staring down at you. He seemed to snap out of his haze when someone voiced out their agreements to your little speech. And after that, he quieted down just as you did. But you could still feel him stealing glances at you, and you couldn’t help doing the same. 

He was wearing another one of his suits - a three piece grey suit, with thin, white strips on it. He had let go of the jacket a long while ago, and had rolled the sleeves of his shirt up his forearms. And you knew you shouldn’t find that attractive, but you did. You did and it was wrong ; because he was your teacher, and because you were supposed to be a little mad at him for refuting the obvious. 

So like a replay of last week, you stayed back, taking your time to pack up your things and waiting until everybody else left to talk to him one on one. Maybe it wasn’t what a good and well behaved student should do, maybe it wasn’t the most appropriate thing to do when you were feeling so attracted to him. Maybe. But you still carried on with your plan, trying to not get distracted by his handsome face, and his pretty hands arranging some papers on his desk. 

“- Why do you keep on pushing me to justify myself like that ? It’s embarrassing, and everyone was so silent afterwards, it was as if I said something wrong, and it’s not agreeable to feel like you are being ridiculous.”

You never had enough nerves to talk to one of your professors like that, but maybe it was the fact that you had a pretty shitty week, or that the way he was looking at you had you feeling some ways you didn’t want to, but you felt a sudden rush of energy and courage coursing through your veins.

“- You did not say anything stupid Y/N, it was very clever on the contrary. And the reason I keep doing that is because I know you have it in you to argue with me and produce this kind of well organised speech. That’s where I want to bring all of my students, but you can always improve and develop your skills. This is what I’m training you for.

- I’m not practising to go to war, Mr. Jeong. All this is not necessary if it makes us feel bad. And why would you do that in front of other students when we already talked about this in class and they all saw you agree with me ? 

- I told you, it’s only because I want you to be able to justify your answers with precise examples like you did today, because it’s important for your future assignments, for your thesis and even just in everyday life. 

- But you know I’m already able to do all that, so why would you seek out my responses everytime ? It feels like you’re targeting me.”

Your cheeks were heating up as time went on, not only because you felt hot from the way all his attention was entirely focused on you, but also because you were so frustrated you could’ve yelled at him. But you had to remind yourself that he was your teacher and that you couldn’t be that disrespectful, that this was the closest you could get to having an argument with him without getting kicked out of your university. He had come closer to you as the discussion progressed, and the sudden proximity between your two bodies didn’t help with your red cheeks. 

“- Yes, I’m targeting you, because I know you’re capable of coming up with things like this, and that you teach a lot to other people by doing so. I love to see you being passionate and invested in the subjects you’re talking about, it makes it fluid to listen to and to understand. Plus, that’s a debate club, disagreeing with you is my job here.”

You wanted to stay calm and collected so bad, wanted to stay as composed as he always was but you couldn’t help how he heightened all your emotions by his mere presence. And the compliments he was giving you didn’t help you relax either. 

“- Yes, okay, but not when you said you approved my views two weeks ago just to change your mind now and make me look like I’ve been talking nonsense all this time. 

- Don’t rely on me and my opinions Y/N, rely on you and what you’re thinking. Do not let other people dictate what you should think on a subject you know and love. 

- I know that, I’m not dumb, but you’re not just everyone else. You’re my teacher and you know what you’re talking about while I don’t. I’m only making assumptions and theories when you give us facts. It’s not the same. 

-  I don’t know it all, what we're making when talking about books and authors who are not here to confirm or deny is always assumptions. You know that I agree with what you said, you know my opinion on Austen and that’s all that matters. 

- But you made it look like what I was saying was irrelevant, you made me look like a fool and I don’t like it, especially when it’s coming from you.”

The two of you had gotten closer and closer, and you were now facing each other, with nothing in between to separate you anymore. Suddenly, you felt an overwhelming need to breathe in his scent, to take the step ahead that was distancing you from him and cut off the act. 

“- What do you mean especially when it’s coming from me ?”

Your breath accelerated when Yunho stepped forward one more time, getting way much closer than decency would allow. But you didn’t make any movement to escape. Because deep down, you wanted this, you craved this. You saw his hand coming up to your face before feeling his fingers brushing against the skin covering your jaw, leading you to raise your head and dive into his eyes. You’ve never seen him from this angle, but with the light of the late afternoon casting shadows on his face, he had never looked prettier.

“- I asked you a question, Y/N.

- I… It’s inappropriate, I shouldn’t say it, I shouldn’t even think about it.”

Despite your words that should deter him from going any further, he swiped his thumb across your bottom lip, smearing your lip gloss. You could hear your own heart beating, aware of every breath you took and every movement of your body. When your eyes met his once again, it was as if adrenaline was spreading through your veins, a sensation that gave you the impression that you were flying. Your gaze flicked down to his lips one second too long for him not to notice and that was Yunho’s last straw as he let his hands drop down to your waist. 

“- I don’t think I should think about what is on my mind right now either.”

As if it was the hint you needed, you grabbed his neck to pull him down to your level. Your lips brushed against his one time, and the next time they met, it was for a real kiss. Yunho squeezed your waist tighter, tugging you closer to him as he let his desire take over his reason. He shouldn’t do that, but your lips tasted like the vanilla chapstick you were always putting on during his classes and that he was dying inside to kiss away. 

It was like your mouth had a mind on its own, kissing your teacher like your life depended on it. You weren’t thinking about the fact that anybody could come in and interrupt you, you weren’t thinking about the fact that what you were doing was forbidden. All you felt was the softness of his hair between your fingers, his large hands on your lower back, and his tongue playing with yours. It all felt too good to stop. 

“- Where are you going ?”

You were putting on your shoes when Dajeong’s voice interrupted you, a knowing smile on her lips. She knew very well where you were going every time you left late at night, during the weekends, she just wanted to tease you.

“- San invited me over, I’m gonna stay the night.

- Of course you are.”

She gave you a little slap on your ass before going back to the series she was watching on the living room TV. Usually, you would’ve laughed or been as excited as her to see your friend but not today. When San had proposed to you to come to his apartment to fool around, you weren’t surprised. It happened often, when neither of you wanted to be alone, when you needed someone to relieve the pressure. And most of the time, you really enjoyed the time you spent together, fooling around without any feelings. But tonight, it was for more selfish reasons that you said yes. 

Because when San was touching you, you were only able to think back to how Yunho’s fingers squeezing your waist felt. And when he kissed you, you could only think back to the way Yunho’s lips made your whole body come alive again. And when he fucked you, you wished it could be Yunho instead. You felt bad, both because you were using your friend to quit thinking about someone else, and because that someone else was your teacher. 

It shouldn’t have felt so good to kiss him, it shouldn’t have sparked a flame and made you crave more, it shouldn’t have made you want to drop to your knees for him. You should’ve been disgusted with yourself and what you did, you should’ve been apologising to him the very next day. But you couldn’t bring yourself to hate this moment, nor to forget it. It was engraved in your memory, enough for you to search him up on social media even when San was holding you in his arms, both of you still naked. It was wrong, once again, but you already crossed the line too many times to count, so who cared anymore ?

For a few weeks, you didn’t even dare to look at him too long, afraid to remember once again how delicious his lips felt on yours. And you didn’t feel his eyes following your every movement like you grew used to. It felt weird, to not have his gaze focused on you, and to see him avert even looking your way during each one of his classes. You stopped going to the debate class, and you stopped answering every one of his questions during lectures. 

And Yunho felt like he had fucked everything up. He should’ve stopped when he started to be attracted to you. He should’ve stopped when he started to seek out your presence even more. He should’ve stopped before kissing you. After you ran away last time, he considered sending you a text to apologise, and ask you to not say anything about what happened. But he didn’t, he wanted to let you breathe and have some time for yourself. Except that he started to get worried about the situation. You hadn’t tried to talk about it with him, you hadn’t come to the debate class since this incident. He spent all his time trying to figure out how to handle the mess he created. That was the question going through his mind once more when you stepped into his classroom for the debate club, looking around to see that no one except you and him were here. 

“- Uh… I’m sorry, did I miss something ?”

Yunho turned to you, and for the first time in weeks, he really looked at you, taking in your silhouette and your outfit - one of the little skirts you loved so much, and your signature black, thigh boots. He should’ve been stressed to see you again, anxious to have to talk to you about this kiss. But instead he felt relief wash over him, and it was like he could breathe again. He looked down at the paper covering his usually organised desk, realising that he had to answer you, even if his voice was shaking a little. 

“- I cancelled today’s reunion, I wasn’t feeling very well.”

You nodded your head, looking around the classroom as if you were searching for something. You debated in your head if you should address the subject with your teacher or not. You were too nervous to talk about it, afraid that he would act like it didn’t ever happen, or worse, as if it didn’t mean anything to him. You were about to go away, to run away, like the other time, when you heard his voice behind you, loud and clear. 

“- Wait ! Please, wait. We need to talk.”

You hesitated for a few moments, your hand hovering above the doorknob. Yunho saw your arm drop by your side before you turned around, taking some steps in his direction, and he was already relieved that you weren’t going to find him disgusting or scream at him. He didn’t need much time to figure out what he was going to tell you, having replayed this exact scene again and again in his head, too many times for his own good. 

“- I have to apologise for what happened last time. It was never my intention to make you feel uncomfortable, or to scare you away. And I’m also sorry for kissing you like that, it was wrong of me, I should’ve never done that. We can forget all about it, or you can do whatever you want because I’ve done enough to make things worse.”

You stayed silent, for seconds that felt like hours for Yunho. He prayed inside that you were going to forgive him, that you were going to tell him that it was okay, that you would simply not talk about it ever again and let him feel guilty about this for the rest of his life. 

“- It’s okay Mr. Jeong, it was a mistake, it could’ve happened to everyone. And I have some parts to take in this too. But I understand. It was a mistake anyway, it didn’t mean anything.” 

It didn’t mean anything. These were the words he unconsciously hoped you wouldn’t pronounce. Because even if he tried to deny it, it meant something to him. It meant so much that he couldn’t stop thinking about it. It meant so much that everytime he sat at his desk, he thought back to the moment he kissed you. It meant so much that even weeks later, he still didn’t forget the taste of your lips, the feeling of having you so close to him. And he craved it. He needed it again. 

“- It’s okay if you want to think about it as a mistake.

- Why are you saying that ?

- Because for me it wasn’t.”

His eyes crossed yours, enough for him to see this little spark he noticed before he captured your lips last time. Maybe it wasn’t only a mistake for you either. Maybe he didn’t fuck it all up. Maybe he still had a chance to make this right, if there was any way to make all of this right.

“- It did mean something to me. I… I haven't stopped thinking about it. I can’t focus on anything else other than you.”

It was as if your breath was knocked out of your lungs again. He did that too much lately. But the intensity with which he was staring at you and your lips, and his confession had your heart feeling weak. And surely, you shouldn’t indulge in your fantasy. Surely, you shouldn’t let yourself get seduced by your teacher. But you were already in too deep, and you couldn’t ignore anymore the way he was making you feel. 

“- I can’t either. I think… I think you should kiss me again, maybe it’ll help.

- Maybe you’re right.”

Yunho bypassed his desk, and you joined him, throwing yourself in his arms. He cradled your face between his hands, and this time he didn’t hesitate when he put his lips on yours, sighing in relief when the taste of your vanilla chapstick invaded his senses again. And the way you were tugging at his suit jacket to pull him closer to you told him everything he needed to know. 

“- Fuck… I missed you so bad Y/N, thought I had messed up everything.”

You stared up at him, now able to see the lust, the desire he had for you going through his brown eyes, and it made your inside flip. You had dreamt about this so much, even if you would’ve rather died than admitted it. But it was true. You were dreaming about having him so close to you, about having him tell you how much he wanted you, about having him just like this. 

“- You didn’t, not at all.”

That was all the talking that was made. Because you already talked too much, and even if he loved hearing your soft voice, all Yunho needed right now was to taste you again, to drown himself in your body and your addicting, intoxicating scent. You didn’t stop him when he reached for your thighs to lift you up and drop you on his desk, not caring about the assignments sheets you were sitting on. 

You discovered the way his lips against yours felt again, savoured the way his tongue played with yours again. And you loved it just as much as the first time, maybe even more. Because this time, you were truly desperate to feel as much as him as possible. You reached to grab his waist, spreading your legs and bringing him even closer to you. And Yunho complied, because he was just as desperate to finally have you all for himself. He let his hands wander from your back to your thighs, and feeling up your bare skin under his fingers was already driving him crazy. 

You tilted your head to the side when Yunho displaced his kisses from the corner of your mouth, to your jawline and then the side of your neck. He was almost devouring you, but you weren’t complaining : it was exactly what you wanted, exactly what you needed. You felt his hands creep up higher, reaching for the hem of your skirt, and his hot breath hitting the now wet skin of your neck. 

“- Do you know how bad I wanted to do this every time you walked in my classroom wearing those skirts and these boots ? Do you know how hard it was to not think about doing exactly that whenever you were looking at me ?”

You let out a moan, not really knowing if it was because of what he just told you or because of the fact that he just gave you a hickey. Your heart was beating too fast, adrenaline rushing through your veins as Yunho kissed down your clothed-covered body, making his way to where his hands were still laying. But it was only when he dropped on his knees and pushed your legs apart some more that you realised what he was doing, your words getting stuck in your throat and being replaced by a pathetic whimper when he kissed the inside of your left thigh instead.

“- Is that okay ?

- Y-Yes Mr. Jeong.

- Call me Yunho, will you ?”

You quickly nodded your head, already far too gone because of his feather like touch everywhere except where you needed him the most. 

“- Good girl.”

And as if it wasn’t already enough to get another noise out of you, he pushed your skirt higher up your thighs, revealing your soaked panties to his hungry gaze. Immediately, he dived in, licking a strip of your arousal through the material of your underwear. This time, another moan escaped you and it encouraged Yunho to push the piece of clothing to the side and taste your juices for real. The groan he let out against your folds had you shivering ang trying to close your legs around his head. But he was holding them with an iron grip, making it impossible for you to move. 

You threw your head back when he sucked on your clit for the first time, one of your hands flying to take a hold of his hair, keeping him just where he was. He ate you out just like he kissed you - hungrily, like a starved man, like it was his last meal. And you were loving it all, trying to keep down your noises because anyone walking by the classroom could hear you and decide to walk in, and you could get in trouble. But the thrill of getting caught was making everything feel so much better. 

“- Feeling good, angel ?

- Yes, so good, don’t stop please…”

The nickname had your legs trembling in no time, and the way he was lapping at your cunt had you close to the edge already. You could feel your pussy clenching around nothing as he sucked on your clit again, making more of your juices come out that he didn’t waste any time licking up. The force with which he was holding your thighs open made you wonder if he could use the same strength to put you in all the positions he wished, if he would use the same strength on you to make you unable to move and fuck you until you passed out. 

“- Yunho… I’m close…”

He hummed against you, doubling his efforts to bring you to the edge. He didn’t need to do much, because you had been waiting for this for too long, and because he felt too good to resist. As you felt your orgasm wash over you, your hand that wasn’t busy in his hair gripped the first things you could reach - one of the paper scattered on his desk, and you couldn’t even feel guilty about the way you crumpled it between your fingers, the rush of pleasure taking over you so strongly you couldn’t bring yourself to care about anything else. 

When you had regained enough consciousness for your legs to support your weight again, Yunho helped you come down off his desk, his hands not leaving your waist even when you were standing in front of him. You smiled when you saw how much you had messed up his hair, as they were going in every direction, and you tried to smother it a little. 

“- Let me see you this week-end if you are free. I want us to talk, and I want to take my time with you, make you understand everything you make me feel.”

And you agreed. Of course. But you started to regret it when you found yourself all alone, in the room of the hotel Yunho had sent you the address of. You were aware that you couldn’t just welcome him at your dorm, or go to his apartment either, because there were risks that someone would recognize you. So here you were, waiting for him. Despite what had happened earlier this week, it still felt incredibly wrong to be there, to do what you were about to do. You looked around the room, where nothing felt familiar and everything felt odd, as if you shouldn’t be here. You were almost ready to leave when the door opened and Yunho entered. 

He was dressed in a pair of black pants, some sneakers and a beige pullover. His casual outfit clashed with the slightly revealing white dress you were wearing underneath your trench. And you felt ridiculous for thinking that putting on something like this was appropriate, though nothing about this situation was appropriate. 

“- I’m sorry, I couldn’t find anywhere to park my car.”

Yunho’s voice broke down the heavy silence hanging in the air, but it didn’t dissipate the strange atmosphere. The room was filled with tension, with unspoken words, with something dangerous and forbidden, but so tempting. 

“- It’s okay, I haven’t been here for long.”

The moment was awkward, neither one of you knowing what to do with themselves. You couldn’t tell him that you were about to leave when he arrived. And he couldn't tell you that the real reason he was late was because he hesitated before coming. But all it took was one eye contact, one look a little too insistent at each other for your lips to find themselves once again, as if they knew better than yourselves what you wanted. And suddenly, nothing felt weird anymore, nothing felt wrong anymore, and everything was finally fitting perfectly - from the way he was holding your waist, to the way the skin of his neck felt under your fingertips. 

“- I missed you.”

The words he whispered against your lips made you feel everything you’ve been needing without knowing it. And you thought that maybe, this wasn’t such a big mistake. And when Yunho’s hands found their way underneath the skirt of your dress to caress the soft skin of your plush thighs, your brain disconnected, letting your emotions control you instead. You got rid of your trench, the material falling to the ground and soon joined by his jacket. You didn’t resist when he grabbed you by your waist to hold you flush against him and kiss you again, finally letting your hands slip under the hem of his pullover and touching his skin. Once again, the way he was kissing you left you dizzy, unable to think about anything other than him. 

“- This dress… 

- Do you like it ? Or is it too much ?

- Fuck, no, it’s…”

He took another look at the way the white tissue was hugging all your curves just right, underlining your silhouette and making you look like an angel. And the fact that you dressed up just for him made his hunger for you grow even more. So when he felt the urge to kiss you again, and again, and again, he gave into it, like he had wanted to for so much longer than he thought. 

“- It’s perfect, you’re beautiful.”

You wanted to compliment him right back, but he didn’t give you enough time to do so, mingling his tongue with yours instead. And you didn’t complain, because you couldn’t get enough of the taste of his lips, of the way his big hands were guiding you to sit on the bed, of the way he was looking at you. You watched closely as he got on his knees to get you rid of these thigh boots that were driving him crazy. Then, he helped you out of your dress, revealing your white lingerie set. 

You thought you would’ve been shy, or embarrassed to let him see you like this. But all you felt right now was desire, and confidence. You smiled when you saw him lick his lips while staring down at your body, and while he wasn’t paying attention, you started to unbuckle his belt. Yunho let you do what you wanted, obeying when you asked him to take off his pullover. When you managed to get rid of his pants, you finally allowed yourself to properly drool over him.

You looked up at him from your sitting position on the bed, while he was still standing in between your legs. It was like crossing his gaze at this precise moment made you realise how real all of this was, and you were hit with the fact that you were really going to fuck with your teacher. But you couldn’t find it in you to fight the feeling anymore. It was too late anyway, you couldn’t go back even if you wanted to. 

So you did nothing to stop him when Yunho pushed your shoulders so you would lay on the bed. You did nothing to stop him when he started to kiss your neck and covered the skin in his marks. You did nothing to stop him when his hands began to roam all around your body because he couldn’t choose only one spot to touch and focus on, because he needed all of you. 

“- I thought you wanted to talk.”

But with the way your fingers were threading through his hair as he massaged your breast over your bra, you definitely weren’t up to talk either. 

“- We’re gonna talk, but after I’ve fucked you.”

He punctuated his sentence by pushing your boobs out of your bra and leaning down to suck on your right nipple. And you couldn’t contradict him when all you were able to do was moan and ask for more. Yunho slowly made his way down to your panties, kissing every part of your exposed skin until he could remember every mole and imperfection of your body. And by the time he took off your underwear, you were already dripping wet and you couldn’t breathe properly anymore. 

“- Please Yunho, please don’t tease…

- Why’s that angel ? You need me that bad ?

- Yes, yes I need you, I want you.”

Finally hearing it from you and not from the dreams he was making did it for Yunho as he searched for a condom in his jacket’s pocket, while you were throwing away the last pieces of clothing separating your skin from his. And you couldn’t help admiring him and his tall frame, his sculpted back, the veins in his hands and arms, his abs slightly peaking out. Everything about him, every inch of him was perfect, made by the Gods. 

And you couldn’t tear your eyes away from his cock either, following his every movement as he got rid of his boxers and put the condom on. It was big, but just as pretty as him, and you already knew he would fill you up just right. When he was close enough to the bed again, you grabbed his hands, pulling him to lay on top of you and kissing him like it was the last time you could taste his lips. 

“- Please Yunho, fuck me…”

And he couldn’t do anything else than do it, sliding right in with how wet you were even if you could still feel the way his cock was stretching you out. But you couldn’t help the moan escaping you when he bottomed out, nor could Yunho stop himself from groaning at how tight you were clenching around him. 

“- Feeling so good around me angel, like you were made for me.”

You were ready to answer, but the force with which he thrusted inside of you stopped you from doing so, uttering a strangled noise instead that was quickly replaced by endless whines and moans as Yunho started to fuck into you. It was as if he knew exactly how to make you feel good, as if he already knew your body like the back of his hand. He found his way to your waist again, pinning your hips down to the mattress so he could do what he wanted, fuck you like he had been wanting to for far too long. 

You could feel your mind drifting far away as all the tension you accumulated these past weeks left your body, washed away by pleasure and desire, washed away by the way Yunho was looking down at you with hooded eyes, lips parted and letting out the most sinful sounds you’ve ever heard. But you needed to feel him even closer to you, impossibly closer to you. So you wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing him down against you. He reached for your legs, guiding you to bend them more until he could hit this sweet spot that made your head fall back with a cry of his name. 

“- I’m not gonna last long angel, been waiting for this for too long. 

- Me too, I’m close, please… 

- You sound so hot when you’re begging.”

You made sure to remember this piece of information before abandoning yourself to the feeling of his cock hitting all the right spots, and of his skilled fingers teasing your clit, the combination making you clench around him impossibly tight as the wave of your orgasm crashed over you. Your release triggered Yunho as he buried his face in your neck, groaning about how good you felt while filling up the condom with his cum. And the crazy thought of him filling you up instead crossed your mind, and it made the feeling of slight overstimulation even more intense. 

You were so out of it that you almost didn’t feel the moment when Yunho got up to throw away the condom. You had purposefully decided to not think about all the consequences that what you just did implied, you just wanted to enjoy this a little longer. So when he came to lay down with you again, you got closer to him immediately, like magnets who couldn’t resist the attraction. His fingers brushing against your cheek encouraged you to turn your head to the side, diving in his hypnotising brown eyes. You stayed like that for a moment, simply looking at each other without saying anything. And as if it was the only thing your bodies knew how to do, you joined your lips again. 

This time, it was slower, more sensual. If before you were devouring each other, now you took your time to savour the taste of his lips and tongue, to appreciate the way his hands were gliding on your skin, tracing invisible patterns on your lower back. It felt so much more intimate than what all this should have been, but it was too late, so you might as well fuck it all up completely. 

This time, Yunho didn’t rush anything, letting you decide on the pace. He let you do what you wanted when you got on top of him, let you deepen the kiss, he let you caress and discover his body. Your kisses wandered from the corner of his mouth to his jawline, going down to his neck, his collarbone, his pecks, his abs, his v-line, careful not to leave any marks on him. You could hide the single hickey he gave you, but you didn’t want to take any risk. When you reached his inner thighs, his hands had made their way to your head, his fingers tangling between the messy strands of your hair. You looked up at him, the desire pouring from your eyes making his heart beat faster. 

“- Can I ?

- Do whatever you want, angel.”

You smiled before you resumed your soft kisses along the skin of his thighs. But this time, you let them go up to his hardening dick. It was even prettier up close - and you’ve never thought you would say that about a dick one day, but you’ve never thought you would fuck with your teacher either. You kissed his length from the tip to the base, before running your tongue along the path you had traced. The action got a gasp out of Yunho, and you could feel him staring down at you as you kitten licked his flushed tip a few times. You wanted to take things slow, to remember this for as long as possible, but you were craving his taste, craving to feel him even more so you just took him into your mouth. He was big to say the least, and you could feel him, heavy on your tongue, stretching your throat as you started to bob your head up and down, stroking with your hands what you couldn’t fit in your mouth.

Yunho watched you intently, mouth slightly open and letting out sighs and grunts because you just felt that good. The sinful vision you offered was enough to make these weeks of mentally torturing himself totally worth it. Maybe he shouldn’t love the way you were making him feel, maybe he shouldn’t love the way you were whining around his shaft, maybe he shouldn’t love the way saliva was spilling out from the corners of your mouth. But he couldn’t care less when he gripped your hair harder and you moaned around his cock, eyes watering and nails digging into the skin of his thighs. 

“- Shit angel, you’re taking it so well. You’re so good to me.”

You hummed around him once more, resisting the urge to gag around him, relaxing your throat until you could take all of him in your mouth. You felt Yunho sit up straight, so he could get a better look at the way his cock was sliding in and out of your lips with ease. The sight was truly mesmerising, and he wanted to engrave it in his memory. 

“- I want to fuck your throat so bad, angel. Will you let me ?”

The pleased sound you let out after he grazed your scalp a few times let him know how willing you were to do just that. Yunho pulled on your hair roughly, forcing you to take all of him, until your nose was rubbing against his stomach and your hands were desperately pawing at his thighs. His thrusts were slow but hard, just what you wanted, just what you needed. 

“- You’re such a good girl Y/N, fuck, you’re going to make me cum. I can do it inside of your pretty mouth, right ?”

You agreed with strangled noises as best as you could with the way he was ruining your throat, but it was enough for Yunho to understand and a few seconds later, he buried himself as deep as he could one last time, cumming down your throat with a loud moan of your name. You did your best to shallow everything, some drops of the sticky substance spilling out. Yunho didn’t waste time picking them up with his fingers, sliding them between your lips instead of his cock, commanding for you to lick them clean, which you gladly did. When he finally let you breathe again, your throat was sore, but you were so wet you could feel your juices sliding down the inside of your thighs. 

“- Open your mouth for me angel, yes just like that. Good girl.”

Yunho grabbed you by your throat bringing your face closer to his and kissing you messily. He didn’t care that he just came into your mouth, he didn’t care that he could still feel his own taste on your tongue as you made out with him, on the contrary, it made everything so much more intense, so much better, so much more special. 

“- Was it good ?

- It was a perfect angel, you’re perfect.”

His hands slid down from your neck to your ass, guiding you to sit on his lap. His touch made you shiver, your back arching unconsciously. 

“- Want me to return the favour angel ?

- Yes please, I want your fingers…”

Yunho pushed you so you would lay down on the bed again, his fingers immediately dipping to your core, brushing lightly against your clit. His fingertips glided with ease against your slit, collecting your juices and spreading them everywhere. And you were hypnotised by the sight, thinking about how well his long fingers would fit perfectly inside of you, how they could reach your sweet spot so easily. 

“- You’re so wet, Y/N, you’re dripping on my hand.

- Please, Yunho…”

The way you were begging for him, the way you were calling his name, the way you were grabbing his biceps, trying to entice him in finally pushing his fingers inside of you - everything was driving him crazy, you were driving him crazy, and he was convinced that he didn’t want all of that to ever stop. His gaze was fixed on your face scrunching up with pleasure when he finally put one finger inside of your clenching pussy. 

“- Feels good ?

- Yes, so good.

- You want another one ?

- Please…”

Yunho bit his lip when he watched you take his second finger with ease, relishing in your sweet voice moaning at the way he was able to reach so deep without making any efforts. You were being so good, and he didn’t have to do anything for you to do so. You were pleading for him so easily, like it was natural, and that was making him feel even more dizzy with want and desire for you. He started to pump his fingers slowly, the squelching sounds from your wet cunt echoing through the room along with your whimpers for more. His other hand creeped up to your thigh, making sure to keep them open. Pleasure was clouding your mind, but your eyes were unable to leave the sight of the veins bulging in his forearms as he fingered you restlessly, thinking about all the ways he could control you, about all the positions he could put you in if he wanted to. 

And when it all started to feel too good, you plopped down against the pillows, not able to hold your own weight anymore from how his fingers were making you feel. Whenever he was curling them against that one spot, your brain turned to mush, and you could only whine and cry for more. You closed your eyes, already feeling close to your relief, but not wanting him to stop. 

“- Yunho… 

- What do you want, angel ?

- I-I want you to fuck me again, please…”

He didn’t let you have any time to think as he bent down to kiss you again, as a reward for being so good to him, so good for him, so perfect for him.

“- Cum on my fingers first, and I’ll fuck you as many time as you want, okay ?”

You nodded energetically, too turned on to think about anything else that wasn’t him. He let down your thigh to circle your clit, efficiently bringing you to your climax in seconds. Your nails dug into his biceps as the rush was taking over you, clenching around his fingers and moaning so loudly he was certain that the people in the room next to you could hear you scream his name. But he loved it, he was loving all of this a little too much. 

But Yunho didn’t ask himself more questions as he got up to find another condom in his pockets. He didn’t dare interrogate why it felt so good when he entered your pussy for the second time. He wasn’t even sure if he wanted to know why hearing you moan his name again and again made his heart beat faster. All he wanted right now was you, all he needed right now was you and your perfect body. 

This time, he wanted to feel you, to really feel you. So he purposely slowed down his thrusts, and even when you wrapped your legs around his waist, all he did was to suck another hickey in between your breasts. It was frustrating, but it also felt insanely good, the type of pleasure that made you unable to think, that made you go to another world because it just felt that good. You knew you were babbling incoherently, mewling for him to go faster, but you were already too far gone to care about how desperate you must look. 

In the heat of the moment, Yunho didn’t think twice before grabbing your wrists and pinning them down to the mattress, but you only whined and clenched around him tighter as an answer. And that made him lose control, his thrusts becoming more sloppy, without any rhythm, because you just felt that good. 

“- Yunho ! I’m gonn- Ah ! Oh my god…

- Cum for me angel, fuck, let me hear you.”

His words pushed you over the edge, the overstimulation from your two previous orgasm making this one feel even more intense and fulfilling. Your moans were high-pitched, but you couldn’t keep your voice down, you couldn’t bring yourself to care about anything else than Yunho, Yunho, Yunho. You could hear him groan as he pulled out, throwing the condom away to pump himself on top of you. He only needed a few seconds to cum on your chest, the white fluid soon covering them and even that felt good. 

You felt so out of your own body that you almost didn’t register when Yunho grabbed some tissues to clean your skin. But the ringtone of your phone was like a brutal reminder that this was only a little bubble that couldn’t last forever. You got up from the bed to answer your phone, Dajeong on the other line reminding you of a gathering with some of your friends that you had completely forgotten, too focused on Yunho and what you just did. As soon as you hung up, you started to put your clothes back on. The awkward silence from before was coming back, but you didn’t want to end it like that. You wished you could’ve stayed with him a little longer, but you had to be realistic : you weren’t his girlfriend and you’ll never be. But when he grabbed your arm and kissed you passionately while you were fully dressed up and he was only wearing his underwear, it felt exactly like that. 

“- Text me later, okay ? I still want us to talk.”

This was becoming too serious for you and you could feel your heart beating too fast for your liking when he cradled your face in his hands to force you to meet his eyes. 

“- So you want to see me again ?

- How could I not ?”

You simply smiled and kissed him again before you left. Your legs were still weak, and when you looked at your reflections in the mirror of the elevator, it was like what you did was written all over your face - in your smudged lipstick and your ruffled hair. But it felt too good, and you were already addicted. You knew it would not be easy to stop, but you preferred to pretend that it could last forever for now. 

You were afraid that everything would feel weird, that you wouldn’t even dare to look at him, or that maybe he would be the one putting an end to all of this. But he didn’t. And the way he was looking at you during his classes could only mean that he craved you just as much as you craved him. And stealing glances at each other was basically all you were able to do for the whole week, because you had a ton of assignments to work on, and because he had too much work. Both of you agreed through text that it was too risky to do anything on the campus, that nothing should happen again in his office. 

However, that didn’t stop your mind from coming back to when he ate you out on his desk, or to him fucking you, or to the way his cock was feeling so heavy on your tongue. And that didn’t stop Yunho from thinking back to your plush thighs clenching around his head, or to your taste, or the way you were screaming his name when he was hitting the right spot. Every night when you came back from your classes, you laid down on your bed, trying to make the aching in your core go away, but the only thing that could satisfy you was him, and you knew it. 

Your frustration reached its peak on Friday when Lola cancelled your night out because she had to work early the next morning. You knew it wasn’t her fault, that it was her colleague for calling in sick just so she could go see her boyfriend, but it still annoyed you, and it was the cherry on top. This whole week would have been stressing enough, but the fact that Yunho made eye contact with you whenever he could, and that he purposefully brushed his fingers against yours every time he handed you some documents added to your irritation. 

You didn’t think twice when you sent him a text, asking him to join you to the hotel because you needed him badly. You didn’t feel ashamed of how desperate and needy you were, because you were too horny to care about the fact that you shouldn’t miss him so much after only one week of not seeing each other. And maybe Yunho should have resisted more but he longed for you, he had wanted you all week and he couldn’t contain his desire anymore. 

This time, he didn’t even greet you when he entered the hotel room, going straight for your lips and taking control of the kiss, devouring your mouth as if you were his oxygen. Maybe you should've talked before doing this again, but lust was clouding his and your mind, none of you thinking about anything else than releasing the tension. 

Soon enough, the floor was covered in your clothes as Yunho manhandled you on your knees, ass up and face down in the pillows, two of his fingers already buried deep inside of you. If last time, he wanted to take his time, today he just needed to ruin you, to break you down, to see you cry for him. And that was exactly what you wanted him to do, what you needed him to do to you. Your brain had already been disconnected, the words coming out of your mouth against your will. 

“- Please Yunho fuck me, please wanna feel you raw, want you to fill me up, please…”

His fingers stilled inside of you for a few seconds, almost making you cry out at the loss of stimulation. What you were asking him to do was crazy, it was not safe, but the way his dick throbbed made all the thinking for him - he wanted that, he dreamt about that.

“- Are you sure about that angel ? 

- Yes, please ! I’m on the pill, I’ll take a plan B, but please I need you, please…”

It was still dangerous, it was still nonsense, but Yunho wasn’t thinking with his brain anymore, nothing logical was crossing his mind anymore. 

“- Fuck, you’re going to kill me Y/N.”

But he loved it, and he loved how tight you felt around him when he pushed his cock inside, loved how he could feel you even better like that, loved how pliant you were in his hold. He gripped your waist as he bottomed out, forcing you to stay still and all you could do was moan out his name like a prayer, because you could feel everything, because it felt even more intense like that, because his strength excited you. And Yunho didn’t hesitate when he started to pound into you, the feeling of your bare cunt around his dick making him delirious. You arched your back more, trying to fuck yourself against his cock because you always wanted more, you always craved more. 

“- You’re such a slut, angel. Fuck ! You’re letting me fuck you raw but you get shy when I look at you, uh ? You’re so fucking naughty.”

You adored it when he called you his good girl, but the way he was holding the back of your neck to keep your head buried in the pillow, and the way he was ruining you felt just as good. The adrenaline rushing in your veins had you getting closer to the edge so quickly, but you didn’t want him to stop. You were unable to say anything else than his name, choking on your words, mewling from the tip of his cock kissing your cervix. 

And Yunho wanted to talk dirty to you, to whisper all the things he knew you loved in your ears, but his mind was clouded with want, and he couldn’t think straight. All he wanted was to spill his load inside of you, do the things he imagined when he was alone, these things he forbade himself to think about. But now he could, and he never felt better than buried deep inside your tight cunt. 

“- Gonna cum inside of you, okay ? Gonna fill you up like the slut you are, angel.

- Please !”

The moan he let out when he stilled inside of you was so erotic you could’ve come only listening to his voice, but the feeling of his cum painting your insides white was what made it for you, your body growing limp in his hold. His grip on your neck and hips tightened, maybe enough to leave you with some marks but you didn’t care. Both of you had trouble coming down, but when you were finally able to, Yunho helped you lay down with him, your head resting on his chest as you were still trying to catch your breath. You felt his fingers brushing your hair away from your face and you looked up at him, your heart skipping a beat when your gaze crossed. 

“- I wasn’t too rough, right ?

- No, it was perfect, I loved it.”

You smiled at each other, and even if it felt too intimate, and even if it was what couples did and not whatever the two of you were, he leaned down to kiss your lips softly. 

“- I loved it too. I think I just want to keep spending a good time with you, I don't want things to get more complicated than they already are, if that’s okay with you. Let’s keep it as simple as possible, yeah ?

- Yeah, I’d like that.”

You were the one to kiss him this time, as if you wanted to seal your agreement, as if it was a silent promise. 

“- Where are we going ?

- It’s a surprise. You can choose the music if you want.”

You didn’t waste any time going through Yunho’s playlist, teasing him about some songs you didn’t think he would listen to and finally settling on a Lana del Ray song. It had been a week since you decided to just do what felt right and not think too much, and he had asked you if you were free to spend your Saturday with him. Of course, you said yes, but you didn’t think that he would pick you up in his car and drive you somewhere, thinking he just wanted to change from the hotel you were always meeting up and show you another place, but it felt like he was literally taking you on a date. 

You watched the landscape unfold through the car window, casually chatting with Yunho about how your week went, about what you ate yesterday, about which book you read lately. Sometimes, you thought that the age difference between the two of you would make things awkward, or that it would clash with your opinions. But it was the exact opposite. Your conversations felt natural, as if you had known each other for decades, as if eight years weren’t separating you. You were twenty-two, you were an adult and you could make your own choices, but sometimes, you were worried about the way he was perceiving you. 

“- Y/N ? We’re almost there.”

You looked down at your phone, seeing that it had in fact been over an hour since he had picked you up and you apparently fell asleep. You yawned as you checked your makeup and hairstyle in the mirror of the sun visor, glad to see that your little nap hadn’t messed up anything. When Yunho stopped the car, you were in a narrow street, where not many stores could be seen. You were about to get out when he asked you to wait, getting out himself and making his way over to the passenger door, opening it for you and offering you his hand to help you out. And smiled up at him as you got out of his car. 

“- You’re such a gentleman.

- For you ? Always.”

His cheeky smile made you giggle, but the fact that he didn’t let go of your hand as he walked you to one of the few shops on the street made your heart skip a beat. He did nastier things to you, said words that would have made anyone feel embarrassed, but for some reason, this small gesture dusted your cheeks in a pink tone that wasn’t due to your excessive use of blush. 

“- I really wanted to show you this place, I think you’re gonna love it.”

He held the door for you, a little bell ringing as you entered a cute, little bookshop. The smell of old pages invaded your nostrils as Yunho guided you through the shelves with a hand on the small of your back. You couldn’t help looking all around, stunned by how much books were in there, by how many you recognized the titles of. The atmosphere of the whole boutique was welcoming and warm, the sunlight reflecting through the coloured glass of the front window displaying moving shadows everywhere and adding to its charm. 

“- You like it ?”

You turned to him with a big smile on your face, almost ready to squeal with excitement. 

“- Of course I like it ! If I could spend my life there I would !

- No one’s stopping you angel.”

A big smile spread on his face as he kissed your forehead and let you wander around, eyes opening wide every time you saw a title you recognized. You were fitting perfectly in the setting with the black bow in your hair, your little brown skirt and your white turtleneck. Yunho was so lost in his contemplation that he almost didn’t hear the lady holding the shop coming out of the stocking room.

“- Yunho ! It’s been a while since I’ve seen you there !

- Yeah Mrs. McMillan, I’m sorry I’ve been quite busy.”

The old lady shook her head, her long, white hair flying around as she did so. 

“- I’ve already told you to call me Isabel, honey, I’m not that old ! And you brought a pretty girl along this time.”

Yunho turned back to you, watching you fondly as you piled up books in your arms, and soon enough the stack would be higher than you. 

“- Is that love I’m seeing in your eyes ?

- No, not at all, she’s only a friend.”

Putting that label on you made his heart ache, because he knew you were so much more than that, and Isabel seemed to know it as well because she looked at him with a gaze filled with disapproval as you came to the counter, still smiling. 

“- Y/N, this is Isabel McMillan, she has been selling books here since I’ve been alive. 

- Nice to meet you Mrs. McMillan ! I have to say that this shop might become my new favourite place, there’s so many things there, it’s incredible !”

Your excitement was contagious as a smile took over the old woman's features too, softening at having someone as passionate as you to compliment her. 

“- Don’t take on your friend’s bad habits, call me Isabel, sweetheart. I’m glad you’re enjoying my hard work. 

- I really do. If I could, I would buy half of these books but sadly I cannot.”

As Isabel noted down the title of the books you wanted to buy - because she didn’t want to use technology, saying it was too tiring to learn these things at her advanced age - Yunho couldn’t detach his eyes from you. 

“- Since you’re with Yunho, and because I’m starting to like you, young lady, I’m going to offer you a little reduction. It’s rare to see people being so dedicated to literature these days, it will not do any harm to my business to encourage you to come again.

- Thank you so much ! But I’m gonna tell you a secret : I would’ve come back, even without that.”

The old lady laughed out loud, along with you and Yunho joined the two of you, because your good mood was infectious. 

“- Do you still have the book I asked you to put away last time ?

- Of course, honey, I’m a woman of words.”

She crouched down behind the counter and came up with a book she handed him. 

“- I’ll pay for it, and all the ones Y/N is taking.

- What ? No, Yunho this is almost fifty euros, it’s too much.

- Can’t I spoil you ? It’s my pleasure angel, I wanna do this for you so let me, okay ?”

The nickname had you unable to hold eye contact with him much longer, and you folded, letting him pay for your books, with butterflies coming alive in your stomach as he held the door for you again on your way out. And Isabel watched all this happen, and she couldn’t help scolding Yunho in his head for being so blind about his own feelings, for being so blind to the way you were looking at him with heart eyes. But after all, it was none of her business. 

“- Put the books in my car, then we can go grab a coffee if you want. 

- I’d like that, yeah ! And thank you for the books, you didn’t have to. 

- Yes, but I wanted to. Stop worrying about that okay ?”

You nodded as you reached his car and you dropped the books on his back seat. But before you could close the door, he handed you the book he took for himself. 

“- This one is also for you. I saw it last time and thought that you might like it. Maybe you could read it while I’m reading one of yours, and when we’re done, we could hand it back with annotations and talk about it. What do you think ?”

When you looked up at him, he looked anxious, maybe because he thought that you wouldn’t like his idea. But you did, the simple fact that he thought about you when seeing this book made you feel dizzy. 

“- I think I love this idea. Wait a minute.”

You turned around, rummaging through all your new books in search of the one you saw and that you bought for the sole reason that it reminded you of him. 

“- I picked up this one thinking about you, actually, so you might read it as well.”

You handed him the book, and he took it gladly as you grabbed the one he picked up for you too. You finally closed the car door and you both headed downtown to find a coffee shop. The first time your hand brushed against his, you didn’t dare to take it. And the second time, he didn’t dare to do it. So the third time, you took a deep breath and intertwined your fingers with his, and he gave your hand a little squeeze, both of you wearing a bright smile on your faces. 

The coffee shop you found was surprisingly pretty empty considering it was a Saturday evening, but you were glad there were not that many people. When you approached the counter, you were ready to recite your favourite coffee order when Yunho took the lead and listed down your usual as if it was written in his mind. You couldn’t even listen to the rest of the things he said to the cashier, focused on why he knew that when you never told him. He must’ve noticed you blankly staring at him, because he turned to you with a little smirk. 

“- What ? You’re surprised I know this ?

- Yes, a little. How did you figure it out ?

- Well, you always come to my classes with the same thing, it was not difficult to notice.”

You rolled your eyes, mainly to hide how flustered the information made you feel. 

“- You’re so obsessed with me.”

As the cashier put your orders down on the counter and announced the price of your drinks, Yunho mouthed “Yes” to you as he paid again for the both of you without letting you enough time to even reach for your purse. And before you could even start to protest, he effectively shut you up by kissing your cheek and dragging you along with him to find an isolated table where you both sat down. As always, the conversation flooded naturally, and you were not thinking about anything displeasing - in this instant, you were truly happy. 

And Yunho was happy too. So when you proposed to play a card game, and that the winner could ask the loser a question about anything, he agreed, even if it was silly, it was okay because it was you. You asked him what his favourite colour was, why he wanted to become a teacher, what he would say to Oscar Wilde if he could talk to him. And he asked you which Austen novel was your favourite, why you wanted to study literature, what your biggest dream was. You were so immersed in your little game that the staff of the coffee shop had to ask you to leave because they were closing the place, and the sky was indeed darker as you got out to walk back to his car. 

He opened the door for you again, and as you watched him make his way to the driver seat, you couldn’t help asking yourself if that was really all he wanted from this afternoon. After all, even if you didn’t put a label on your relationship - if you could even call it that - you knew deep down that the main reason he was seeing you was sex. And if he didn’t plan on having sex with you now, does this mean that this meeting you didn’t dare call a date was only that ? But then, it took you down a rabbit hole of never ending questions that you didn’t want to dig into.

Sensing that your mood was a little down, Yunho didn’t dare to talk too much and disturb you, even if he didn’t understand why. You had a good time, you couldn’t stop smiling and you really seemed to enjoy hanging out with him. And the thought that you could be questioning yourself about your situationship made him a little nervous, though it shouldn’t because this was what it was - a situationship. And it didn’t matter if you made his heart beat faster everytime he saw you. And it didn’t matter if you made him feel alive for the first time in years. It didn’t matter because having more with you was simply impossible. When Yunho parked in front of your dorm, all the serotonin from this day had been washed away with the doubts filling him up.

“- Thank you for everything Yunho, I had a great time.”

But your smile seemed fake, it didn’t reach your eyes as it usually did. And Yunho felt his heart clench painfully. He didn’t want you to feel sad with him. Never. You were supposed to enjoy his company as much as he enjoyed yours. 

“- Are you really alright ? If I overstepped, tell me, please. I don’t want you to keep these things from me Y/N.”

You sighed as you turned your gaze away from him, but his hands on either side of your face forced you to look him in the eyes again. Why did he have to be so perfect all the time ? It would’ve made things so much easier if he didn’t care about you.

“- You did nothing wrong, I’m just thinking too much. 

- About what ?

- I just think we should be more careful if we start going out like that because someone could recognize us. And you could lose your job, or I could get kicked out. I’m probably just being paranoid but…”

That was not the problem, but you didn’t want to talk about the real reason you were feeling so melancholic. Because it would probably ruin everything, and you needed him too much for your own good, you needed him too much to risk losing him.

“- You’re not being crazy, okay ? I understand, and if you’re afraid we might meet someone we know, we can go somewhere else next time, anywhere you wanna go, i’ll take you. How does that sound ? 

- Good. It sounds good.

- Then we’ll be doing that.” 

You nodded, and even if you still felt a little bad, one look from him was enough to make you feel better, to make your worries all go away. So even if your heart was screaming for you not to, you let him kiss your forehead, and then your lips, so softly it made you weak in the knees. But it felt too good to ask him to stop. So you didn’t, and you just kissed him back until you were out of breath. 

“- I’m gonna go, I have to work on your assignment because fucking the teacher won’t get me a free pass, right ?

- That’s the spirit angel, I’m always expecting the best from you.

- Then I have to start now. Be careful on the road, Yu.”

He nodded and watched you get out of his car, not leaving until he saw you get inside the building of your dorm. And then only did he authorise himself to let out a sigh. Because you were too sweet to be true, because you gave him a little nickname that had him feeling much more things than he shouldn’t, because your scent was still lingering everywhere and it was driving him crazy. You were driving him crazy, to be honest. 

And it was bad, really bad. Yunho didn't mean for things to go this far, but he felt like he couldn’t stop now. And if he was honest with himself, he didn’t want to stop now that he had a taste of you. However, it still felt incredibly wrong to go home to his girlfriend when he had spent the day with you and that he didn’t think about her only once. The smell of home cooked food hit him as soon as he stepped inside, and the weight on his shoulders even more heavy as he announced that he was home. 

“- You’re coming back late, baby ! But that’s okay, at least everything is ready for dinner, I made your favourite !”

Guiltiness was creeping up inside of him with every word she said, and everything sounded so fake when he served her his lie about having an important meeting with his colleagues. She didn’t deserve this, she didn’t do anything for him to stop loving her. On the contrary, Hana was always sweet and caring, she was there for him and had been for years. But maybe it was the problem. Maybe it has been too long.  But Yunho perfectly knew the real reason, it was just too painful to admit it, and it would make things too real. 

For a while, he preferred to ignore the fact that you were making the flames come alive again in his heart. He preferred to ignore how much stronger his feelings for you were than for his girlfriend he was supposed to love and cherish and marry soon. But was it really a crime when everything she was doing, everything they were doing seemed faked, forced, done out of habit rather than because of true love and affection ? Yunho knew that he was already in too deep with you to stop, and the way Hana was not paying attention to what he was saying was making him feel a little less remorseful about the way he was only seeing your face when she was kissing him good night. 

Work and classes have been hectic for the both of you these past weeks, so Yunho’s proposal of a getaway trip to the beach this weekend felt like a bubble of oxygen. Sure, you had seen each other, but for never more than a quickie. Sure, you didn’t stop sending each other texts and photos to keep up with your days, but you wanted to hear him calling you angel again. And even if it was supposed to be only that, even if you shouldn’t want that, you still missed spending time with him, talking with him. So you held on to the promise of this little break with him to finally breathe and relax.

When you finally spotted his car parked a few streets away from your dorm, and his tall frame leaning against the drivers’ door, the wind blowing his perfectly styled hair, your heart started to beat faster. The rush you got everytime you laid your eyes on him never flattered. And you didn’t really think about it when you ran to him and threw yourself in his arms. You could hear him chuckling as he buried his face into your neck, holding you closer to him and spinning you around. Both of you needed this hug, and Yunho couldn’t ever get tired of your addicting scent, breathing you in for a moment before he cradled your face into his hands to kiss you like he had wanted to these past few days.

“- I missed you, angel. 

- We literally saw each other yesterday.

- But not like that.”

This comment was enough to make heat rise into your body again. But you simply slapped his chest playfully as he giggled like an idiot. But he didn’t mind your teasing, it was entertaining. Like the gentlemen he always was, Yunho opened the door of the car for you. Every time he drove you somewhere, you felt like a passenger princess - getting to choose the music, opening the windows whenever you wanted, holding his hand when he didn’t need it. The weather was starting to warm up a little, and you smiled as you felt the pleasant air hit your face, making your hair fly in every direction. 

And yes, Yunho felt a little guilty for cancelling plans he had with his girlfriend to take you to the beach, but he needed it. He needed to escape from his life and his routine for just one day, but more importantly, he needed you. He didn’t want to spend his weekend with her family, he wanted to spend it with you. And as he watched you run towards the water, squealing as the cold liquid touched your bare feets, he felt like it was worth it. Your long skirt was floating around you to the rhythm of the wind, and to him, you’ve never looked more beautiful than right now - with your hair all messy, and the brightest smile he’s ever seen on your face directed at him, asking him to come with you. 

There were only a few other people on the beach, allowing you to be as affectionate as you wished. The picnic both of you had prepared was spent between sweet kisses and mindless conversation. And then, Yunho laid down to rest his head on your lap while you read another book he had given to you. You mindlessly started to run your hands through his hair, smiling lightly when he released a satisfied sigh, relaxing even more. And Yunho swore he could’ve fallen asleep just like that - with the sun warming up his body and your presence warming up his heart. 

“- It’s been so long since I’ve last gone to the beach…”

Your self-reflection steered Yunho out of his slumber, looking up at you to find you entirely focused on the landscape in front of your eyes. Suddenly, your tone was a lot more nostalgic, and he couldn’t help his curiosity. Because yes, he knew your body like the back of his hands by now, and he knew what you were liken but he knew so little about your past, about you - the you he was starting to fall in love with. 

“- But you grew up close to the ocean, right ?

- Yeah. We used to go every weekend, it was always the best day of the week and I was so excited to go every time. But when my parents started to fight, we stopped going. Apparently, it reminded them of too many memories and they had no time to do that anymore. I tried to go alone once. I was maybe eight ? I don’t remember well, but I know that I got scolded so badly I’ve never tried it again, even as a teenager. And I kinda had an apprehension to go see the ocean again. 

- I didn’t know that. I’m sorry for proposing that, we can leave whenever you want if you don’t feel comfortable, angel.”

Your eyes finally came back to him, smiling softly at him as you pushed a strand of his hair away from his forehead, your touch making goosebumps come alive on his skin. 

“- It’s okay, I’m over all that now. And when I think back about it, these trips were never perfect. My parents were already fighting back then, I was just too young to understand what it meant. But today I’m here with you, so I knew it would be nothing like that. You make everything better, Yu.”

You leaned forward, pecking his lips for a second or two, but it was enough to make Yunho smile again. He had no idea your childhood could’ve been so chaotic, and from what you told him, he could easily imagine the classic scheme through which you went. And it made sense with the women you were today - strong, independent and determined. But he also learned that you needed him to baby you sometimes, and he was always willing to let you fall into his open arms every time you needed to. And the fact that you were slowly opening up more and more to him everyday felt like a reward. 

“- What was your childhood like ?

- Well, I have a pretty conservative and religious family, and I’ve always felt like I’ve never belonged with them. My parents love me, I know they do, but it’s like I don’t fit in with them, you know ? It’s a strange feeling, but I’ve always been the rebel one : I didn’t do the studies my parents wanted me to do, and I didn’t follow every one of their rules as I grew up, and I’ve never had the same faith as them. I think that’s what disturbed them the most. 

- The feeling of being a disappointment, and of going against the flow is never easy to deal with, especially as a kid. But look where you are now. They should be proud of you for doing a job you love. At least, I’m proud of you.”

This time, Yunho made the first move to kiss you. 

“You’re really an angel, too good to be true.

- I could say the same about you.” 

Because he simply had that aura that made you feel safe, that made you feel comfortable, that made you feel at home. Every time you looked into his eyes, it was as if nothing else existed, as if he was the only thing that was real. But you didn’t want to think about it, didn’t want to dwell on what it meant, didn’t want to think about the fact that this won’t last forever. Instead, you kept on talking, telling each other some childhood memories. And it all felt so peaceful, like you were all alone, like it was both of you against the rest of the world, like you were in a little bubble that could never burst. 

And Yunho really wished he could stay like that with you forever, but the sun was starting to go down and the wind was turning colder. You could’ve fallen asleep on the ride home, lulled by the way he was quietly humming to the songs of the playlist you choose. This day made you forget about everything else, made the stress go away, made all your worries disappear. But you knew it was not only because you got away, but mostly because Yunho was with you. He always had that effect on you, no matter how hard you tried to resist it. You didn’t want this day to end, you didn’t want this feeling to ever go away. So as he parked near your dorm, you kissed his lips one more time.

“- Do you want to come up ? My roommate is not here. 

- What about being careful, angel ? Anyone could recognize me here. 

- It’s Sunday, everyone is either locked up in their rooms working or spending the day out. No one will see you. Please ?”

The fact that you started to kiss down his neck as well as your pleading eyes were close to breaking Yunho’s resolve. He knew he shouldn’t let you have this much of an effect on him, but you had that effect and he couldn’t deny the way he weakly said “yes” and let you drag him to your dorm room. But the way you were giggling against his lips as you pushed him to sit down on your bed made him forget all about his doubts. As you dropped to your knees on the ground, settling between his legs, Yunho couldn’t help the shaky breath that escaped him. 

“- I think I have to pay you back for today, don’t I ?”

The smirk playing on your lips as you unbuckled his belt and helped him get out of his pants did nothing to calm his heartbeat down. And the way you were always so eager to take care of him, to have your mouth on him, did nothing to help either. But it felt too good, so he didn’t stop you and let you kiss his tip one time before you started to kitten-lick his cock. 

“- Fuck, don’t tease, angel. 

- But you look so pretty like that.”

Your pouty lips made him want to spoil you but also to be a little mean. But you were such a good girl for him, taking all of him in your mouth. Everytime you were getting down on your knees for him, Yunho couldn’t help the rush of adrenaline going through his veins.  He threw his head back when he felt your cheeks hollowing, sucking him in deeper. He wanted to stay like that forever, with you drooling around his cock, and his hands buried in your hair. But he needed to have his mouth on you too, to make you feel good. So he took advantage of your size difference to throw you on the bed with ease, pushing up your long skirt so he could dip his head under the material and lick a strip of your wet cunt through your panties. 

“- Yunho… Please, don’t tease.

- But you look so pretty like that.”

You smiled as you lightly slapped his shoulder, eliciting a few chuckles from him before he helped you get out of your underwear and finally got a taste of your cunt. You could only see the top of his head, but the way he was subtly nibbling on your clit had you closing your eyes to appreciate the moment even more. His tongue lapping at your cunt was sending you to places you’ve never been, and you couldn’t care less about the other people at the dorm who might hear you whining his name loudly. This day was so perfect, Yunho was so perfect. You couldn’t ask for more. Or you could, but you would be pushing your luck, and you didn’t want anything else if it meant you could be with him in some way. But you didn’t want to think about all that right now, so you pushed his head further in between your thighs. 

“- Don’t stop, please…”

Yunho groaned against your folds, doubling his efforts to bring you to the edge, practically making out with your pussy at this point. But you didn’t mind, not at all. You wanted him, wanted every little part of his body and soul to be yours. As you felt your orgasm approaching, you started to grind against his face, moaning at the way his nose was bumping against your clit every time you rocked your hips. And when you came with a cry of pleasure, Yunho made sure to hold your thighs open for him to eat you until he had gulped down the last drop of your juices. 

“- How do you taste better every time ? I’ll never get tired of it.

- Good. Because I don't want you to stop.” 

Both of you were still half clothed, but you didn’t mind it as Yunho came up to kiss your lips, his tongue finding yours easily and his hands grabbing your breast over your top like a second nature. Everything felt so familiar, so right, like you were where you should be. Your lips were sealed to his, from the moment he pulled out his condom to the moment his cock entered you, only separating for a brief instant when you moaned in harmony. 

And no words where needed as he made love to you. Because there was no other way to define how he was fucking you, to define the tenderness of his touch, the fondness of his gaze, the softness of his breath hitting your skin. Every sound he elicited from you was immediately drowned in his mouth, your hands tugging at the material of his shirt as you felt close to the edge again. You felt full of so many emotions you couldn’t even name them all, but you knew that Yunho was the only reason you were feeling all that. 

“- I’m close…

- Me too, angel…”

The words you’ve been meaning to say for some time almost slipped past your lips as you felt the rush of pleasure course through your body. And if Yunho hadn’t nuzzled his head into your neck, he would’ve probably been about to say them too. As you came down of your little paradise where nothing existed except for him, you realised how close you’ve been to fuck it all up. And you didn’t want that - you were going to take everything you could have from this relationship, and no matter the state you would end up in, it would be worth it because it was him. 

“- Hey ! Watch where you’re going Y/N !”

Dajeong kept you from walking straight into the door that opened just in front of your face. You sheepishly thanked her, and tried to not get lost in your thoughts again.

“- You seem absent since yesterday. Did something happen this weekend ?”

You knew exactly why you were so absorbed, you knew it. But you couldn’t say it, you couldn’t talk about it with her. It would mean putting Yunho in a dangerous situation, and yourself too. And what would she think of you ? You were always the first one to comment on how stupid all the girls crushing on your teacher were, and now you were the one who ended up in his bed every time he needed you.

“- It’s nothing, I just… Don’t know what to do about something and I’m thinking about it a little too much.”

Your eyes travelled from your friend by your side to Yunho’s silhouette. He was standing near the door of his office, having a lively conversation with a woman you’ve never seen before but you supposed that she was one of his colleagues. You had no right to be jealous. And you weren’t. Not really, at least. You were not jealous about seeing him with someone else, you were mentally prepared for that to happen. But you were jealous of how good she looked beside him, thinking about how ridiculous you must be whenever you were going out with him. Your age difference was visible, and everything felt much more right when he was with someone his age. But you quickly averted your gaze from them, not seeing the pained look on Yunho’s face as he turned his head your way. 

“- You wanna talk about it tonight ? 

- I don’t know, it’s complicated.”

Dajeong smiled at you and grabbed you by your arm, trying to cheer you up a little. She didn’t like to see you down - you were always so energetic and joyful, it felt odd whenever you were like that. 

“- No matter what you decide, I’m here. And I’m keeping you home for a movie night anyway.

- I'd like that a lot. Thank you.

- I told you, I’m here for you.”

You thanked her again and tried not to think about Yunho for the rest of the day. You weren’t even mad at him, except the fact that you had no right feeling like that, it was mostly because you realised that you really couldn’t be with him for more than what you already were. And it hurt more than you think it would have, because even if you tried to stop yourself from daydreaming about a future with him, you still did, and you had started to believe that it could happen, that it could be true. But you had to be sensible and remind yourself that it was impossible, that even if there was the slightest chance that he loved you, he could never do it in the open, and you were not ready to stay a secret your whole life. But you still went to his office after your classes because he had asked you to. When you entered the room, Yunho was waiting for you, anxiously chewing on his nails. He gestured for you to close the door behind you and when you made sure it was locked, you took his hands in yours, confusion lingering in your eyes. 

“- What is it Yu ? Are you alright ?

- I should be the one asking you that.

- Why ?

- Because of what you saw this morning. It’s not what you think, I swear there’s nothing between us, she’s just another teacher I’m working with. I’m not doing any-

- Stop.”

And he did it, mouth closing shut as you tried to not let all the doubts and the melancholy that invaded you today be perceived in your voice or your touch. You stood on your tippy toes to kiss his lips softly, hoping that it would calm him down a little. 

“- I didn’t think anything about it, okay ? I’m not mad, or sad, or anything else. And you can do absolutely what you want, you know, it’s not like I’m your girlfriend or anything. I don’t have a word to say about your relationships.”

The words hurt you, but they hurt him too. He knew you weren’t his girlfriend, he made that clear enough so you understood that nothing like that could ever happen. But it still felt wrong to hear you say that, he still felt bad at seeing the slight discomfort in your eyes. However, you didn’t let him reflect on that too much as you let go of his hands. 

“- Don’t worry about that, okay ? I have to go, I have plans with Dajeong for tonight but text me if you need anything.

- Yeah, have a good night angel.”

You smiled at him before leaving and Yunho’s heart clenched when he saw you go out one more time. Every night you spent together, you had always left before him, and every time, he wished you could stay a little more. And every time, he prayed that it would not be the last time he was going to see you. Even if everything about this was wrong, he didn’t want it to end, and for once, he wanted to be selfish. He wanted to think about himself, to put his happiness first and not everyone else’s opinions. 

That’s why when you told him you had a really bad day, a few weeks after this incident, he decided to think about what made him happier lately and put you first. So he picked you up after class, without telling you where you were going, but it had become a habit of his to never reveal the destination of your little adventures. The ride was silent, the music being the only sound disturbing the quiet atmosphere, but as soon as Yunho parked on the hill that overlooked the whole city so you could see the sunset, you bursted into tears. Yunho pulled you into his lap, running his hands through your hair to calm you down, and encouraging you to talk to him. 

“- Tell me what’s going on, angel. 

- I’m just… Everything I do, it’s never enough. There’s always someone who’s doing it better, there’s always someone to remind me that I’m enough. I’m never enough, for anything or anyone.”

Seeing you like that broke his heart, but Yunho didn’t let his own emotions overpower him. He cradled your face in his hands, whipping your tears away tenderly. 

“- You are enough Y/N, you’ve always been enough and the way you’re feeling right now does not reflect what you really are. You’re doing so much all the time, and for everyone. I promise you are enough, angel. And I’m proud of the person you are, I’m proud of you.”

You nuzzled your head in his chest, a little more serene than five minutes before, his scent soothing your heart and your mind, and his touch so soft and delicate you could’ve fallen asleep in his arms. You stayed like that for a moment, not needing to say anything else as his presence was enough to get you to relax, and you couldn’t say if you spent ten minutes or an hour like that, but you felt so peaceful you didn’t want to move. Whenever you were with him, it was like a little bubble engulfed the two of you, and that nothing else existed beside him and everything he was making you feel. 

“-  Thank you, Yu.”

And you pecked his lips to reinforce that idea. And Yunho pushed away a strand of your hair before he kissed you too, deepening it when you whimpered against his mouth and wrapped your arms around his neck to keep him closer to you. And you stayed there, simply making out and quietly talking about nothing and everything. But it was enough to calm you down. And it was enough for Yunho to be sure about what he wanted to do. But not now. Not when you were so vulnerable he felt like you could break in his arms. 

“- Can you take me home ? I’m tired.

- Of course, angel. I just need to stop by the gas station.”

You nodded and kissed him one last time before getting back in your seat. Your mood was much better on the way back, casually chatting with Yunho as he drove you home with his hand comfortably resting on your thigh. You mindlessly played with his fingers, not really paying attention to the road. You only registered the notifications noises from his phone when he was out and paying for his gas. You glanced at his illuminated screen, not really wanting to know who was texting him but just out of habit, and the nickname of the person texting him was all you needed to know. “My girl 💕” was enough to understand that you weren’t the only one, that he wasn’t as invested in this relationship as you. You were aware of all these things, but to be hit by the realisation, to be faced with the truth was harsh. When he sat back down in his seat, you had to brace yourself so the tears wouldn’t spill from your eyes, so the words you were about to scream at his face wouldn’t slip out from your mouth. 

“- Are you alright, angel ?

-  Hum, yeah, I just wanna go home and sleep. Don't worry.”

You offered him a little smile and he caressed your cheek, but you had to mentally restrain yourself from pushing his hand away. You let him drive you home, forcing yourself to smile and seem normal and composed. Only when you were snuggled underneath your blankets did you allow yourself to let the tears fall freely from your eyes. You were expecting this to stop at some point, but not like that. You were trusting him, you thought he was telling you the truth, you thought that what would separate you would only be the fact that it was impossible, but not that. 

It was so unlike him, always so kind and gentle, always thinking about you and your comfort first. That was surely why you never thought he would do something like that. But after all, you should've seen it coming. This was truly too good to be true, too perfect to last. But you would've wanted it to last for a little longer, for forever. And coming back to reality was hard, it was like waking up from a dream to realise you were only living in a nightmare all this time. That night, you fell asleep with his scent still lingering on your clothes, and dried tears covering your cheeks. 

The next morning, you weren’t doing any better, if not worse. The truth was sinking in, and you were not strong enough to answer his texts yet, leaving him on read and purposely ignoring his demand to see you today. You got up from your bed either way, only because you needed to eat to compensate for your empty heart, and that what Dajeong must have cooked smelled really good. 

“- Wow ! You look like a zombie. A cute zombie, but still a zombie.”

You smiled a little, but it didn’t reach your eyes. You sat down on the stool of the kitchen, watching your roommate finishing up your meal, mind clouded with thoughts of him even if he was the last thing you wanted to think about. 

“- On a serious note, are you alright ?”

The casual question made you tear up again, and you had to take a deep breath so you would not cry again. Dajeong turned off the stove and came to sit down beside you, one hand resting on your shoulder as she encouraged you to talk to her. And you did. You told her everything about what had been going on between Yunho and you for months. It felt like it all started yesterday, like it was only a dream. But with the way it was about to end, you rather have not started this at all. 

“- I would’ve never thought that you would be the type to go out with our teacher. 

- I know. There’s just something about him that I can’t get enough of. I… I think I love him.”

It was the first time you dared to say the words. But it was true. You loved him even if you tried to resist it, even if you tried not to succumb to the temptation he was. But you gave in, and you were happy for as long as it lasted. You knew it would hurt, but you didn’t think it would hurt that much. You underestimated how important he became, how much you relied on him for everything. 

“- And it’s not even the fact that he has a girlfriend or someone else that makes me mad, I was okay with that because I had come to terms with the fact that I will never be more than what we were. But he treated me like I was more, he made me think that he cared about me just to pull out something like that. And I had to find out, he didn’t even have the balls to tell me himself. 

-  He’s a coward, I must admit. And he clearly doesn’t deserve you. He could have never loved you like you need to be loved, you’ll always be a secret with him. It’s better like that. 

- Maybe. But it hurts.”

Some tears escaped your eyes again, and Dajeong didn’t hesitate before pulling you into a tight hug, caressing your head as a way to calm you down. She knew how much a heartbreak could hurt, especially when it ended up like that, especially when it was as intense as what you had. 

“- I know, lovely. It’s gonna take time, but it’s gonna stop hurting eventually. But I think you should talk with him, ask him clearly what’s going on before completely cutting him out of your life. You need closure, you at least deserve that.”

You nodded as Dajeong proposed that you spent the day together, doing some skincare and talking again and again about the same people for the hundredth time while watching some silly movies to cheer you up. And you did exactly that, trying to not think about him for at least one day. You were anxious to go back to class on Monday, fearing that everything would be awkward, or that he would completely ignore you. Somehow, you found the courage to send him a text throughout the weekend, simply to tell him that you needed some space, some time to think about you and him. You didn’t see the point of lying to him, and you silenced his notifications just after. You were strong enough to answer him, but not to witness him pretend and care about you.

Your resolve started to crumble when you saw how miserable he looked the next few days in class. His eye bags were terrible, and he seemed to have lost all his energy. Usually, Yunho would animate all his classes and passionately teach you his subject, but lately, he was only giving you some group work to do, keeping his interventions to a minimum. He spent his time sitting at his desk, either trying to grade some papers or zoning out, looking through the windows. Everytime his sad eyes fell into yours, your heart clenched and ached. But you didn’t have the strength to confront him about what you saw on his phone. You wanted to talk to him, you wanted him to deny, to tell you it was not what you were thinking and that you were the only one - even if you knew it was impossible and that dreaming about it made everything hurt ten times more badly. 

You missed him. You missed hearing his voice, his laugh. You missed his smile, and the dimple he had when you made a terrible joke he couldn’t help giggling at. You missed his touch, the way every time his skin was against yours everything else disappeared. You missed being in his arms, and the sentiment of security it gave you. You simply missed him, and having to see him everyday without being able to look at him for more than a few seconds was a torture. And even if you had unblocked him because you were weak, you continued to ignore every one of his texts and calls either way. It was painful, but a lot less than if he told you face to face that he had someone else, that he lied to you, that he made you fall head over heels for you before fucking it all up, before crushing your heart in between his fingers. 

One day, when you came back to your dorm, you found flowers waiting for you by the door. There was no card with it, but Yunho was the only one who knew that lilies were your favourite flowers. And you cried again when you opened the trash can only to find yourself unable to throw the bouquet away. So you kept it, putting it in a vase and placing it on the kitchen’s counter, seeing him every time you looked at the flowers. 

Another day, when you handed him back an assignment and that your hand brushed against his, it was like time stopped for a moment. Your breath was knocked out of your lungs as you looked up at him, and the plethora of emotions you caught dancing in Yunho’s eyes was enough to bring you back to when he was calling you angel, to when he was treating you like the most beautiful girl in the world. You ran away as quickly as possible, because you were on the verge of telling him that you loved him, and that it would only make things even more complicated than they already were. You felt so stupid for falling for your teacher, but you felt even more ridiculous for believing that you could be more than a side piece to him. 

However, that didn’t stop you from looking at the texts he sent to you, asking you to come meet him in his office because he wanted to explain everything properly. You heard Dajeong words ringing in your head as you took a deep breath and entered the room you had grown familiar with. His scent surrounded you immediately, and Yunho jumped upon your arrival. His glasses were sitting on the bridge of his nose, and his hair were completely dishevelled. You still managed to be smitten by his ethereal beauty. But the way he was looking at you with such desperation forced you to avoid his gaze quickly. 

“- Y/N…”

His voice broke down, and your heart broke too, a little more every time he tried to start a sentence. Yunho wanted to forget everything, to hold you in his arms and promise you the world. But he couldn’t, and the way you were hugging yourself made him want to get down on his knees and beg for your forgiveness. In all honesty, he would do it in the blink of an eye if you asked him, he would do anything if it meant you would forgive him. But it was nearly impossible, and he was well aware of that, but you deserved an explanation - that and so much more. 

“- What did you want to tell me ?”

Your tone was harsher than you wanted it to be, and you didn’t dare look his way, and Yunho didn’t dare make a step in your direction, afraid that you would run away again. But he had to tell you the truth, he had to be honest for once. 

“- It’s not what you think, angel.

- Please, spare me with that, I’m not blind, nor an idiot.

- No, you’re not… And that’s why you deserve to know what is going on. The message you saw the other night was from… My girlfriend.”

You knew it, but to hear him say it was different. It hit exactly the right spot to reopen some wounds that had never healed. You already felt on the verge of tears, but you tried to keep them under control, gripping the handles of your tote bag to ground yourself in reality and brace yourself for what was coming. 

“- But I don’t love her anymore, it's been a long time since I’ve stopped feeling anything for her. We met when we were in highschool, and we were a good match at that time. She was my friend before becoming more, but after all this time, there's nothing left of what I felt for her in the beginning. We were only kids, I didn’t even know what I wanted to do with my life and my family had already planned my future with her. They want me to marry her. But I don’t, not at all. But if I leave her, I know that they will never want to see me again. So I stayed with her but you made me realise what it was to live and be happy again, and that I don’t want to marry someone I don't genuinely love.”

While he was talking, Yunho took some steps in your direction, trying to maintain eye contact with you even if all he wanted was to slap himself in the face for how stupid he had been to think he could handle this the way he did it, to think that you would never discover his secret. At least, you were here. At least, you were listening to him. It should mean something. It should mean that everything wasn’t over yet, right ? Yunho held on to that, but when he tried to reach for your hand and you took a step back, your eyes glistening with tears, it was hard to believe that everything could be alright. And to know that he was the reason you were crying made him feel even more guilty.

“- I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, angel. I wanted to do it a million times, but I was so afraid of losing what we had, I didn’t want to freak you out. And I couldn’t lose you. You are my oxygen, my breath of fresh air in the middle of all this mess, and I need you. I promise I wanted to tell you everything the night you discovered it. But you became so quiet all of sudden, and when I looked at my phone, I assumed you had seen her text. But I swear on my life, I wanted to tell you. I should’ve never lied to you in the first place, I know that, and you can’t imagine how sorry I am.”

You were now sobbing uncontrollably, trying to cover up your voice with your hand, but the hot tears falling down your cheeks were enough proof of how affected you were. Yunho wanted to cradle you in his arms, to protect you from the world like he always did, but he couldn’t shield you from himself and his mistakes. He was supposed to be your safe place, your comfort zone, not to make you feel like that.

“- Do you understand how bad I felt when I saw this message, Yunho ? I… I knew this wouldn’t last, but to realise that you lied to me all this time was even more painful. You made me believe that we had a future together, and you treated me like your girlfriend even when I was not, even when you had someone waiting for you at home. And it hurts.”

Your voice broke down on the last words. You felt pathetic, some kind of silly, naive girl who couldn’t see what was right in front of her eyes, some kind of idiot who thought that it could end well, that it could end without you suffering too much. 

“- I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. And I’ll spend the rest of my life apologising if that’s what you want. We can have a future together, I want a future with you.

- I can’t see it. I-I can’t ask you to leave her, and to turn your back on your whole family for me. ”

One tear rolled down Yunho’s cheek, and you wanted to wipe it away, but he did it himself before you could do anything. It was better like that. If you felt his skin against yours again, you didn’t know if you would be able to finish what you started. 

“- I could do it. If it’s what it takes to keep you with me I’ll do it. I’ll do anything. I love you, Y/N. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone else. I love you so bad it makes my heart ache. I’m ready to do everything it takes to be with you. Everything.”

You should’ve been happy to hear these words you were longing for him to say, only weeks prior. But right now, it only broke your heart more, it only pushed the knife a little deeper into your open wounds. 

“- That’s not what I want for you, you deserve better. I don’t want to fuck up your whole life, even if it meant I could love you.

- But you are my whole life, you’re the only thing I need.”

You wanted to believe him. You wanted to say yes so bad. You wanted to fall back into his touch, to fall back into his arms. But you couldn’t. Still, you let him caress your cheek, swiping his thumb against it to get rid of the tears that had dropped there. It was like you could finally breathe, as if the weight on your heart and the knot in your throat had disappeared only because he touched you. He always had that effect on you. But you had to leave, you had to leave or you would cave in and you knew it wasn’t good for you. So you took his hand in yours, pushing it away slowly, as if not to scare him away. You looked up into his teary, brown eyes. It broke your heart to see him in such a state, but you had to think about yourself too. You had to take care of yourself now that he wasn’t here to do that anymore. 

“- I’m sorry, I need some time to think. I’m… Not sure I can love you like this anymore. I’m sorry.”

He tried to smile at you, but it was joyless, without this little sparkle in his eyes that you loved so much. 

“- You don’t have to apologise, angel. You did nothing wrong, I’m the one who fucked up. I’m the only one to blame here. Take all the time you need, I’ll wait for you.”

You nodded, and you finally let go of his hand, painfully slow to feel his touch for as long as possible. You took a last look at him before turning away and unlocking the door of his office. 

“- Goodbye, Yunho.”

It felt like you were saying farewell, and Yunho wanted to run after you, to beg you to let him still be a part of your life. But he had to respect your choice. So he stayed still, standing there as if it could freeze time in place and give him the ability to come back in time and do things differently. But it was too late, and the only thing he could do was give you space and hope you would grant him a second chance, and hope you would be kind enough to forgive him even if he didn’t deserve it at all. 

You thought that clearing up the situation with Yunho would make it easier for you to move on and forget him as you had initially planned, but you clearly were in the wrong. Feeling his eyes on you was even more painful now. But at least, he seemed to have found his energy back. It was the only thing that made you feel a little better. Because you felt like shit, even if you tried to convince yourself that what you did was for the best, that you couldn’t be together, that you had to be sensible, you didn’t want to do all that. You craved his touch, his kisses, his loving gaze. You craved him and his soothing aura. You craved his love. You wanted him back, but everything was so complicated, everything was so messed up, you weren’t even sure it could work. 

Even if Yunho respected your wish for space and time, he still hadn’t stopped texting you throughout your days - reminders for you to drink, eat and rest properly. You never answered but you saw the messages and it was all that mattered to him. And even if he tried to come back to his daily life, to his routine, he couldn’t. You had taken such an important place in his heart that everything felt empty without you and your smile to brighten his world. Nothing felt as appealing as before. Reading couldn’t take his mind out of things anymore, because he could only see your annotations on the ones you had given to him. And everytime he passed by Mrs McMillan bookstore, his thoughts immediately came back to you and how pretty you looked that day. 

So when some colleagues from the university invited him to have some drinks after work, he said yes. Yunho hoped that some alcohol and talking about anything and everything could take his mind off of you. But all it did was make it worse. With each drink, he felt the urge to call you even stronger. All he wanted was to at least hear your voice, hear his name fall from your lips, see your face, even if the pain he caused was written all over it. 

“- Angel…

- Yunho ? Why are you calling me ? Is there something wrong.”

He sighed in relief at finally hearing your voice ringing in his ears again, at finally hearing you say his name. He preferred the surname you had granted him, but he would take everything that you were willing to give him. 

“- I just… I miss you, and I need you, and I’m sorry. I wanted to tell you again. Because I feel like I didn’t apologise enough.

- It’s okay, I swear. I told you I need some time. Everything is…. Puzzling.

- Still, I’m sorry. 

- I know you are.”

There was silence, but the fact that you hadn’t hung up yet made a little bit of hope blossom in his heart. Maybe there was still a chance. Maybe there was still a world in which you could grant him your forgiveness. 

“- I can’t imagine my life without you. I tried. But I can’t. I need you, angel.

- You know that we can’t, that I can’t. You have a girlfriend, and your family, a career. I can’t just come in and mess up everything.

- I don’t care about all of that. If I’m with you it’s worth it. Please, angel, let me at least see you, even if it’s the last time I get to have you. I want you, one last time. After that, I’ll let you go if that’s what you really want, and I promise you will never have to worry about me again.”

You stayed silent for a while again, your defeated sigh being the only noise echoing through the line.

“- Okay. But this is the last time.”

However, when you joined him in the hotel room you had grown familiar with, you didn’t want it to be the last time. You wanted to stay in his arms forever. You didn’t talk, afraid of the things you could say, afraid you would beg him to stay, to come back, to do exactly what he swore he would do if only you asked him. But you tried not to think about that as you let him kiss you tenderly, as if you were going to break under his touch. And you might, because you needed him so bad it made everything hurt when he was not there.

No words were exchanged as you got rid of your clothes. No words were exchanged when you pushed him down onto the bed and straddled his thighs. No words were needed when you kissed him for the first time in weeks. It felt like you could both finally breathe, like you felt alive again, and it made all the pain go away for just a moment. 

“- I missed you, angel, missed you so fucking much…

- Me too, Yu.”

This was all you were able to say before he shut you up with another desperate kiss, making out with you as if it was the last time he got to have your lips on his - and maybe it would be. So you just decided to shut off your brain, simply running your hands through his hair and thinking about nothing else. You wanted to take your time and appreciate his touch, his eyes and the way he was moaning under your hands, but it felt like you were in a hurry, quickly discarding both of your underwear and sinking down on his cock. You gripped his shoulders, closing your eyes as you let yourself bask into the feeling of finally being full. But your desire took over you, grinding on his dick desperately.

And Yunho couldn’t look at your face, couldn’t see your beautiful eyes without thinking back to them filling up with tears the day he messed up everything between the two of you. But his body was overwhelmed by the feeling of you wrapped around him after weeks of only being able to look at you from afar, relying on his souvenirs to remember what it felt like to kiss you. He desperately wanted to engrave your face in his memories and keep it there forever, but it was too hard. So instead, he just flipped you over the bed, burying his head in your neck to not be tempted to cross your gaze anymore. But his hands still found their way to yours, fingers intertwining as he sped up the pace of his thrusts, both of you moaning in harmony. 

It wasn’t as intimate or as emotional as Yunho wanted your last time together to be like. But the alcohol was clouding his mind even more than everything he felt for you, and the urge to make you his - even if you weren’t, and that you would never be - was taking over him more and more with every clench of your cunt around him. 

“- Fuck, angel… Tell me you love me please…”

You didn’t want to, because you knew how that would make both of you feel, but the words spilled out from your lips before you could stop it, squeezing his hands tighter. 

“- I love you, I love you so much…”

It was enough for Yunho to feel a rush of emotions and desire flood through his veins, his thrusts becoming sloppy and losing any kind of rhythm. It all felt too much, from the way he was hitting your sweet spot to the way his little whines mixed with “i love you”’s that made your heart throb and your mind wanting to hear more of them. It all felt too much to the point you felt on the verge of tears as he laid on top of you, trying to regain some consciousness. But you were fully aware of everything that had just happened, and even if you wanted nothing more than to spend another night in his arms, you knew it wouldn’t do you any good. So you stayed like that until he fell asleep, murmuring again and again against your skin how much you meant to him, that he needed you. And then you ran away, putting your clothes back on in a hurry and checking out your appearance in the mirror of the elevator you had grown familiar with. Except that this time, there was nothing left from the joyful sparkle that usually brightened your eyes whenever you left the hotel. All you could see was how miserable he made you once again, all you could see were the tears cascading down your cheeks and along the marks he left on your neck. You slapped your hand on your mouth, pathetically trying to cover up your sobs. It hurt even more than that day, for some reasons. It all hurt too much to hold it in. 

When Yunho woke up in the morning to an empty bed, he was not surprised, but he was still disappointed. He wished he could have woken up one last time to your pretty and relaxed face, he wished he could have held you through the night one last time. Even if it happened only a few times, when you were too tired to go back to your dorms, it still felt incredibly right to open his eyes and see you all cuddled up against him. Getting up and leaving the room he had so many memories in revealed to be a lot more difficult than he thought it would have been. He took his time getting dressed and making sure he didn’t forget anything before slowly closing the door behind him. Taking a quick look at his reflection in the elevator’s mirror like you did only a few hours ago was enough to notice how wretched he was. His hair were a mess, his eye bags were even worse than a few days before despite him having overslept, and his clothes were wrinkled. But the way it was written all over his face was even more telling. 

The ride back to his apartment was like a walk of shame - because he had promised to his girlfriend that he would be back before 2am, because he made you suffer again, because he felt like shit, like there was no escape from this situation he put himself in. Yunho only had time to hope that Hana was still asleep but as soon as he opened the door, she jumped from her spot on the couch where she had apparently spent a lot of time worrying, seeing how panicked she seemed. 

“- Where were you !? You told me you would be back last night and it’s fucking 10am, Yunho !”

Her anger was totally justified, but the only thing he wanted to do right now was to just be swallowed by the floor, or to curl up in his bed and not get up for the next three years. 

“- I’m sorry, baby, I…

- You what !? It’s the fourth time you’re pulling something like that on me this month, what is going on !?”

Yunho was ready to serve her another well prepared lie, the ones he kept on telling her since he started ditching her to be with you. But he just couldn’t bring himself to say that they all got back to one of his coworkers apartment to keep drinking after the bar closed, and that his phone died so he couldn’t warn her about it, and that he was too drunk and out of his mind to think about borrowing one of his colleagues’. He couldn’t lie to her right now, he couldn’t anymore. And as if it was now a habit every time you sneaked into his mind, he felt tears prickling his eyes, dropping his head low like the coward he was because he couldn’t bear to see her hurt, to see her crying because of him too. And as it had become quite usual for him through the course of these last weeks, apologies slipped past his lips. 

“- I’m sorry Hana, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry… 

- Yunho… Tell me what happened, talk to me. You’ve been so distant and quiet lately, it’s not like you to be so… So absent.”

He wanted to answer, to finally tell her the truth, to tell her everything, but he couldn’t get any word to leave his mouth, only quiet sobs resonating in the hallway as he tried to stop the tears from running down his cheeks. Slowly, Hana got closer to him, taking his hands in hers and guiding him to the couch where he sat down without any resistance and let her pull him into a hug. She could hear his voice shaking and breaking down everytime he let out another apology. It took a long moment for Yunho to finally be able to calm down and find his words back. And when he did, it didn’t make things easier, it didn’t make telling her easier. 

“- I… I met someone.”

The sad but knowing smile spreading on her lips told him everything he needed to know. Because, of course, she was not dumb. Of course, she had understood a long time ago what was going on. Of course, Yunho was the only asshole, the only one to blame for everything he put her, and you, through. 

“- I expected you to say that. 

- I’m so fucking sorry, Hana. I never meant for that to happen, I hadn’t even thought about doing that before I met her. And once it started I couldn’t stop, and when I wanted to tell you everything, it was already too late to not hurt you, and I just got carried away. I’m sorry, I really didn-

- Stop ! Just… Stop.”

So Yunho did, anxiously watching her as she ran a hand through her hair, probably trying to come up with an easy way to tell him that he was a bastard. Which he was, to be honest. 

“- I’m not an idiot. I know that you stopped loving me years ago, Yunho. And I’m not blind either, I saw how you got that sparkle in your eyes back one day, and I knew very well it was not because of me. And before you say anything about being sorry, I know it. I know you are, and I know that you wouldn’t have wanted to hurt me even if I’m just a friend in your eyes. 

- Hana…

- Don’t look at me like that, it’s not a big deal. We’ve been a couple since highschool, it was impossible for us to keep on loving each other until the end of times. I stopped feeling any romantic feelings a while ago, too. Our families are simply what they are, and we can’t change them. But I’m kind of glad you gave us a valid excuse to break up.”

Yunho couldn’t help the giggles that escaped him. She always had that dark humour that he loved so much, and that nobody got except for him and her. 

“- You did not just forgive me for cheating on you because you wanna break up, right ?

- Oh, I certainly did !”

Both of them laughed it off, and it was like a weight was lifted off of his chest, like he could finally breathe a little better. Not as well as when he was with you, but it was a little less bad, now. 

“- You’re sure you wanna do this ? You know how much trouble we’re gonna get into if we break up, right ?

- I know, and trust me when I tell you that I’ve thought about it a lot before. And I’m ready, I don’t want them to dictate my life anymore. I think you can understand that better than everyone else.

- Yeah.”

Silence fell back onto the room, and Yunho never felt more at home in his own apartment than after having agreed to break up with his years-long relationship. But he knew it was better like that, knew that they both needed to finally close this chapter of their life and take a new beginning. 

“- We’re still friends, though, right ? I still need to hear you spill all the tea about your weird coworkers.”

Hana laughed loudly, and the smile spreading on her lips had never been this wide since so much time that he almost forgot what she looked like when she was happy. 

“- Of course ! And I wanna know all the updates about that girl, because she must be brave to want to engage in a relationship with you.”

It was his turn to smile and let happiness fill him again. Why he waited so much time to finally be honest with her when it was clear that they had no feelings for each other anymore would certainly forever be an enigma. But at least, they were both free. At least, Hana could find someone that will truly love her, that will love her like she deserved to be loved. And Yunho didn’t know if that would be enough to convince you that he was serious about you, that he truly loved you, but he had to try. Because you were worth every tear he shed, and all the pain in the world. He would go through these weeks of anguish again and again if it meant you would take him back. 

But Yunho had always been a gentleman - and yeah, it was ironic to describe himself like that after everything he had done - and he let you have as much time as you needed, as much space as you asked for. And even when the urge of letting you know about everything that happened was strong, he resisted the temptation to call you, or to send you a text he knew you would not read because you stopped doing that since that night. 

Everytime his gaze crossed yours in class, it was as if the first time he kissed you in that empty classroom replayed in his mind, it was as if he could still see himself wearing his leather jacket more often only because it still smelled like you and your perfume, it was as if he could still hear you say you loved him for the first time. Everytime his gaze crossed yours in class, he wished you wouldn’t shy away, he wished you wouldn’t look so hurt, he wished he could go back in time and not do all the mistakes he did, he wished he could do everything right and make you happy, and love you right. 

Still, he let you run away after every class so you wouldn’t risk staying in his presence too much. Still, he let you slip through his hands a little more every time you answered his questions about books he had given to you without that energy and passion you had when it was only the two of you in that hotel room, when everything was still perfect. But it also felt like if he didn’t do something right now, you were gonna leave and never come back in his life. He had to do something, he had to stop being a loser, he had to show you that you were never the second choice. 

You were surprised to find another bouquet of lilies on your doorstep before going to class on a random Wednesday. It had been weeks since you last talked to him outside of classes, and it had been more than two months since you last looked at his texts. You weren’t strong enough to block his number again, but you tried not to open the messages anymore. This time there was something written on a little note ; him asking you to meet him by the hill he showed you the night it all went down if you were willing to listen to him, and that if you didn’t come, he would understand that you didn’t want to see him again and that he would leave you alone, no questions asked. 

You thought that you would hesitate more, but in your heart, you had already made the decision to go as soon as you saw the bouquet of your favourite flowers he managed to remember even months after you told him. When you parked your car at the spot he had showed you, his was already there. Yunho was waiting for you, contemplating the cityscape, leaning against the hood of his car, hands in the pockets of his black pants, his white tee moving along with the wind. He looked good in anything, but these simple outfits were always making him look so cosy that you wanted nothing more than snuggling in his arms. 

The warmer wind of the end of spring hit your face as soon as you put your feet outside, the breeze making your hair and the skirt of your flowy dress fly around like you were in some type of dramatic movie. Expect that in those, it always ended well, and that you knew for a fact that your happy end was impossible. But Yunho turned to look at you almost in slow motion, and this time, you couldn’t avoid his intense stare, and this time, you wanted to dive back into whatever the two of you had. 

“- You came.”

His voice was steady, but you could still hear the relief seeping through his words.

“- You asked.”

It was as simple as that, as simple as breathing and walking, as simple as reading and writing. He asked, he called, and you were there in a heartbeat because you would sell your soul for him. 

“- We broke up. We agreed that we didn’t love each other anymore for a long time, and that it was the best decision for both of us.”

You wanted to be sarcastic, wanted to tell him something along the lines of “you want a medal or something”, but it was only because you didn’t know how to deal with that information. Because you didn’t know if it meant anything to him, if it meant anything to you. Before you could think about a kinder response, Yunho continued. 

“- I told you I was willing to do everything if it meant I could be with you, and I was serious. This is the first step, and I’m gonna go all the way even if you’re not willing to give me a second chance because you made me realise how wrong I was all this time.

- But you have a family, friends and a job. You won’t give all that up for me, I don’t want you to. 

- Angel, I’m taking all these risks because it’s for you, because I want you to see that I’m ready to do anything it takes to be with you, and that I’ll keep proving that you didn’t make a mistake by choosing me if you’re letting me come back into your life. My family gave up on me a long while ago, it’s only time for them to understand everything they put me through. And I believe that my friends will be wise enough to choose to support me, because you’re my happiness, and that’s what they should wish for me. 

- Yes, but you’ll still be my teacher. 

- I’ve been your teacher until then and it didn’t cause any problems, did it ? And even if I got in trouble, I know we would figure something out. You mean everything to me Y/N, and I will spend the rest of my life making myself worthy of you if you let me because I love you like I’ve never loved anyone else before.”

Your mind wanted you to say no, but your heart was begging for you to say yes, to give in, to let yourself be happy. And for once, you decided to stop being reasonable. For once, you decided to let things go, to let him guide you through it, to let yourself live.

“- You already are. You’ve always been worthy of me, Yu. I-I love you too, I love you so much.”

This time, when tears started to run down your cheeks, Yunho didn’t hesitate one second before pulling you into his arms, running his fingers against your back to soothe you. The way you immediately circled his waist to have him closer to you made his heartbeat pick up, and you chuckled lightly against his chest when you noticed it. And you stayed like that for who knows how long. The only thing you were aware of was that you’ve never felt as good as when you were in his arms. And maybe it was wrong, maybe it was a mistake. But it felt just right, it clicked perfectly, like the last pieces of a puzzle you had forgotten on your desk for years and that you finally came back to complete only now. When you raised your head to look him in the eyes, Yunho smiled, and you couldn’t help doing the same, especially when he kissed your forehead, and then your nose, and then your lips. 

“- In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”

You wanted to slap him for being so cheesy, but the way your heart missed a couple of beats at the intensity with which he was looking into your eyes rendered you unable to talk, unable to think about some quote to say back to him. 

“- If you keep on confessing to me like that, I might give in, you know…

- Don’t worry about that, angel, I have a ton of citations you’re gonna love.”

His boyish grin made you smile wider, and you couldn’t help the urge to kiss him again, because now you had the right to do so. Being the teacher’s pet had its downsides, but in terms of love confessions, you were certain that Yunho would never run out of ideas. And you were okay with that, because as long as he was with you and that you were with him, there was no way something would go wrong. You smiled at him, and he smiled at you, and as the sun set behind you like in the romance movies you despised, you thought that maybe, happy endings were not so bad in the end, especially when you were the one getting kissed passionately at the end of the film.

-> i don't allow any copies, translations or reposts of my work.

-> moon dividers by @samspenandsword

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[fandomobbsessedb]

Alastor x F!Overlord!Reader

AN: this is the result of the first poll I posted, Alastor won so here we are!

I’ve kinda broken this into two bits in this one shot, there’s a warning farther down if you want to keep within the ideas of “headcannon” but farther below I have the start of a story, I got a bit carried away and am too far gone to delete it.

⚠️Warnings: mentions of blood, death, weapons, smoking, maybe 1 instance of cannibalism ( but its more in the sense of revenge rather than a canabalistic reader) (idk man it’s hell if your triggered don’t read 😭) this is really long already so I might just break it up or continue it to make a part 2. I have a LOOOOOOT of references in here to so many things, if you guys can pick up on them leave a comment and I’ll tag list you in my next fic if you want! Or don’t I honestly couldn’t care less it’s just for fun :p

Reader is referred to with afab terms.

Pt2-

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• In your life you tried to stay on “the right” path. Your parents raised you right, you tried your hardest to be nice, and where always on your best behavior, but after getting the short end of the stick for too long you kinda… loose it.

• You ended up in hell after a night out partying with some of your most valued clients, when you went to drive yourself home the heel of your stiletto got stuck under the gas pedal, as you tried to pull it out you took your eyes off the road and 💥 BAM 💥 you where hit by a large grocer truck.

•Opening your eyes to a red wasteland, the bright flash of lights and the smell of brimstone flood your senses. Looking down to try and gather your bearings you notice your whole body wasn’t (skn/tn) anymore… it was marble grey?

“Where… where am I?” I mumbled under my breath, trying to gather my surroundings, a bright flashing catches my eyes, a gigantic neon sign in the sky gives me my anwser…

“Welcome to Hell!!!”

“Hell…. I’M DEAD?!!!!” I groaned out through barred teeth and stood to my feet, looking around I saw definite signs, this was Hell alright. A blood red sky, fires everywhere, little sinners running around stabbing and shooting one another.

“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, ALL MY WORK, MY SHOPPING EMPIRE, MY CLOSET, MY AWARDS, MY EVERYTHING, RAAAAAAHHH!!!” In my anger I grabbed the nearest sinner and threw them to the ground, putting my foot between their shoulder blades and grabbing their arms.

“You’re gonna tell me right now, what the hell is going on, WHY AM I DEAD AND HERE-” I shouted in their ear, seeing blood come out… oh shit I probably burst their ear drum… oh well, I’ve done that plenty of times to my assistants.

“D-d-do you mean, like in hell, or or just this area?” They questioned nervously. To be fair they were a scrawny little thing…

“What in the-“ I paused to look around, then referred back to this little shit “actually HELL are you talking about?”

“W-w-well, you must, *gulp* you must be new here, huh?” It asked with a weary smile and a weak little laugh, probably trying to ease the tension. “Well, down… down here, we uh, we have overlords who- who rule certain areas, we’re in Ms.Leefolt’s t-t-t-territory right now, I mean, our king Lucifer, Lucifer and Lilith Morningstar rule all of hell…”

“Well, that certainly is… intresting.” I smirk and stand up, releasing his arms but not letting my foot off his back. “So these, overlords… are they appointed by your king, or born into or something?” I question with a sharp red nail in between my teeth, thinking…

“No, no ma’am just, just anyone who’s ballsy enough to, to, take over enough territory and have enough demons- sell them their souls in exchange for something. Umm- if it’s not too much of a bother, could you let me go… I- I can feel my ribs crushing under me…” it started wheezing out and trying to get a hand under its chest to place a barrier between their chest and the ground.

“Hm, well if that’s all true, I can’t let some little thing like you going around gossiping about me.” I growled looking down at this freak… pressing my heel into his spine harder.

“No! No please, I won’t say a thing I promise!! Just let me go, please… pleas-“

SPLAT-

“Whoops, my bad, I slipped.” I reasoned, pulling my now bloody leg out of his torso.

“Ohh, eeeeeew eweweweweweweeew, I’ve got bits of his, ugh, lung on my heels.” Flicking away the bits of organ from my shoes, I take a breath and another look around but this time in a planning sense. Overlords huh, well, I’ll just have to see how much this ‘miss leefolt’ likes the taste of arsenic, I wonder when the last time she had a homemade pie was….

• So of course to establish some dominance in my new living arrangement, I gutted that bitch from the inside out. I took her territory, her power, her souls, even her manor. When I went to her office to kill her I found the deed to her house and all the contracts of sinners who gave her their souls in a pretty shittily hidden safe.

• I mean, I had to work so hard to build my life up just for a stupid grocer to end it all, so this is fine… right?

• The years go by and the world changes, you became one of the most powerful and influential overlords in hell, re-establishing your power once held on earth to a business in hell. Rosie and Velvet quickly becoming your closest friends, Velvet in a more business sense and Rosie being your go to gossip gal. Both of you having elegant and refined tastes. You and Husk became friends over talking shit in a casino one night, and remained friends after his downfall. He talks to you about this, radio demon, from time to time but you haven’t heard much of him

Little do you know he knows almost everything about you~

• Your walking around Cannibal Town one day waiting for Rosie to finish a meeting, watching children run around and little carts selling all kinds of body related snacks.

I lost a bit of my sense of surrounding and almost tripped on a kid running around with his friend throwing a head back and fourth.

"Jerermy! Stop playing with your lunch and apologize to that nice lady you almost ran into."

"Sorry miss, I didn't mean too." He said looking down at the head ashamedly, then offering me a piece of the cheek. "Would you like some of this face? It's really good." He looked up at me with an excited look. "Oh thank you, but I'm waiting for lunch with my friend, I'll go to the butcher and get some though, it looks really good." I smiled my pointy teeth at him, patted his head and motioned him back to his mother, she waved to me and I nodded my head back, thinking it was time for Rosie to be done by now.

"My my, with your reputation of anger issues I would assume you would tear that poor child into bits upon realization." A staticky voice spoke behind me, tilting my head back but not my body as I don't know who it is. I look him up and down, his outfit and cane/staff thingy give off quite the powerful impression. "My, mhm, reputation?" I pester raising my eyebrow.

"Ah-hahahaha, My name's Alastor, its quite a pleasure to finally meet you in person." He introduced reaching for the back of my hand to place a kiss. Him saying his name reminded me, I too finally recognized the name. "Oh, Rosie has told me much about you." The radio demon, his names been brought up many times around cannibal town since he frequented their shops and small town locals.

"Oh yes, Rosie is one of my dearest friends" He replied linking our elbows and started walking towards the shop. "Mine as well, she is quite the darling, so let me ask you now, where you just standing there when I got to the park, or where you going to follow me in silence since I left the emporium~" He didn't stutter in his step but my revelation made the air feel a bit more, weary on his side. Reaching into my hand purse I grabbed my lipstick and hand mirror and paused my walk to apply a touch more. Looking just past my lips in the reflection I saw his eyes in the back corner snap to my down, then back up to my eyes with a tight smile. "Well, are you coming? I know Rosie hates to be kept waiting." I snapped it shut and outreached my elbow waiting for him to link his so that we could start the traverse back to Rosie's.

• After our little group luncheon with Rosie, Alastor and you didn't verbally indicate that you were closer in any sense. But physically you swayed like two tree's. Brushing branches back and fourth with the breeze, restless and apart yet labeled as "together"

• You started doing weekly business deals, him acquiring land and souls for you, and all he asked in returns is he uses that land and those souls as he pleases. Which honestly isn't a lot. When he pulls people or their shadows to come help at the hotel- their mostly your people but he always sends them back to whence they came.

• He likes to pretend he doesn't necessarily care for being around you, however he's always looking for time you two can be together, or even thinking of each other. On his radio show he'll mention new shopping, eating, entertainment locations on your turf. He knows you listen when your able to. Sometimes he uses his power to let his station be the only one playing where ever you are. In the car, in a shopping store, you could be sitting in the bathroom and it would get to the point where you can hear it from the vents. Making you roll your eyes and finish your business so you could get to your office to listen to the radio.

• Truth be told... you where falling to his whims as well. Alastor didn't necessarily have "territory" but many places in one area he had influence in and quite often frequented. When you had rips or damage to your very expensive very delicacy clothing you would walk with him to the seamstress, and afterwards you would often get tea or lunch together. Maybe he knows a good diner or two and ya’ll will sit there and eat, then get a milkshake (mostly bc you wanted one, he just indulges to make you happy though he doesn’t care for the cold sweet taste) and drink it through two straws, awwwwwwwwwwwwe!!

• When either of you knew of prestigious events happening around you invite the other to be your plus one. You go shop together to find outfits for the occasion. You started attending overlord meetings together, with yourself sat on the opposite side of Rosie, sending each other glances and touches under the table whenever Rosie wasn't looking or walked away for a brief moment. At the events you stay close together and often stand away from the crowd, whispering and gossiping together, allowing yourself a to drink silly, little do you know how well he can hold his liquor and often will be the one making sure YOU get home. Sometimes you wake up still dressed, like the gentleman he is, and sometimes you’ll wake up in some red pajama set…. Like the gentleman he is, he’s not gonna let you sleep in an uncomfortable outfit. But he’s respectful about it.

• He often send subliminal messages through your radio to help you fall asleep, to push you to coming to see him, to maybe just stay in your town if he knew something really bad was going on outside. His favorite to do is when your falling asleep he’ll play the calmest songs from his time to comfort you as you drift off.

• When he officially asked to court you he compared you to the beautiful crimson of the sky, saying your cheeks where more bright and delightful to gaze at then the morning sky, when it was particularly bright. All kinds of poetic gestures, sending crows to your windows, sending your gifts of bodies with knives in them, and the knives had small notes left for you on some quote from a book you like. Now how he knows those are your favorite books are beyond you…. you don’t talk about your books much but, maybe he’s seen you reading it at some random point in time? Who knows, not you.

• He’s all in all not a bad partner, of course when you want to go out he usually goes along with what you want to do but if there’s something he refuses to do, his claws are sinking into your arms to keep you from dragging him to do it.

• His smile is genuine around you and you adore when he lets you pet his ears~ he’s not that intimate early on in the relationship but when your just sitting on a couch or watching the sun set from somewhere and you just reach over and pet his ears, he is putty in your hands, physically he keeps his compose fairly well but inside he’s willing to do anything to keep you touching his ears, telling himself he would sell YOU his soul if it meant you wouldn’t stop, petting his ears and helping him groom his antlers, don’t even get me started on the tail… oh wait he’s already got something going on with that… well darn… hopefully you will keep accepting his caring actions rather than push them away.

——-STOP reading here if you don’t want to get into the more “story line” of this idea, if you want more of a story KEEP READING——-

• One night some sinner had gotten into your liquor stash and drank himself ditzy, you chased him into an ally way, looking to end his fucking life. Most of those where gifts from clients that most likely had aphrodisiacs and at the time where trying to get down your pants, but he drank from one of the few special bottles Alastor had gifted you and you went ballistic. You ended up catching him and killing him, and taking a tip from Rosie and ripped some of his limbs off, letting yourself indulge in the taste of warm, liquor filled blood. When you came too you realized you didn't know where you had chased him. Now covered in blood, liquor, rain, mud and whatever mess you stepped in on your way over. Seeing the iluminating lights of the sign for the Hazbin Hotel, your only thought was to try and get to Alastor.

*knock knock knock*

*creeeeeeeeeeeeeeek*

"Oh! Oh my gosh, hi! Come in Come in. " An ecstatic girl ushered you inside, making a towel appear seemingly out of nowhere and helping you dry off. "I'm Charlie, whats your name?"

"Oh, how rude of me" I respond trying to shake off my chills, my nose starts to get a bit runny. "Uhm I'm Y/N, I don't mean to sound intrusive- uh is Alastor here?" I ask hesitantly, not wanting to just barge in but after the night I've had I wasn't in too much of a mood for pleasantries.

"Oh yes! Here, why don't you sit at the bar, have some tea or water or something and I'll run up to his radio tower." She sat me down at a bar stool and walked away. The bartender was turned around already whipping me up something.

"So he's got you wrapped up here huh?" I inquired with a smirk, resting my hands under my chin and trying to keep a little composure. His wings ruffled a little bit before he reached for my favorite hell made brand of brandy, my cotten candy brandy, I'm not one for sweets but I love the zing it gives you. The kind where you loose your vision for a good 7 seconds.

"You haven't usually been one to be a stranger, what gives?" Husk asked turning around handing me my drink and a bowl of pretzels.

"Well when I saw you weren't at your usual gambling tables I didn't think to question it, thought you where maybe getting more chips... ooooor hooking up in the chip room.... ooooor selling even MORE of your soul, if that's even possible, maybe like your wings or your feathers or, like your body as a human shield in the next extermination, never thought you'd be here slinging drinks." I shrugged swirling my drinks around the glass before taking a sip.

Before he could respond he took a bit of a step back and growled really low and deep in his throat.

"Ah yes well he owed me a favor and since I took an investment in this hotel I needed a little work on it done." Alastor came up behind me with a warm towel wrapping it around my shoulders as the one Charlie gave me was wrapped around my waist keeping my legs warm... unfortunatly the sinner got caught at a bad time, I was in the middle of 'me time' before bed and was in my good silk nighty. Glad I walked to my office with my fuzzy robe and ballet slippers. I feel really warm and fuzzy, my heads all….. comfy now… is that static coming from Alast-

"Oh deerest your all wet, would you like to come up and I can help you clean up." He asked you shaking the towel on your shoulders helping you sit up. "Oh yes please" you responded looking at him with sad tired eyes.

-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-

I took a sip of the warm tea Alastor had made me and laid back in the bath, taking it all in. I WAS just planning a quiet evening in at home, maybe snack on some treats I got in the Gluttony ring, watch some hells soap operas. Now I’m here, in my beau’s bathroom, relaxing… maybe I can convince him to let me up to his radio tower to listen to his late night show live, oh that would be fun. I wonder what it looks like up there? I’ve only ever seen his actual town house… a little ways away from town-

*CRASH *

“What the fuck?!” I sat up so fast I almost slipped, sitting on my butt… in the tub…. Shit did he spike my tea?

“Alastor? Is everything okay?” I asked loudly. Standing up carefully keeping three points of contact with the tub and the floor. I reached for a different robe he had given me, a soft red fluffy one, with (what I hope is faux ) fur along the collar and wrists.

Walking towards the bathroom door very carefully I cautiously reached for the shiny silver handle. Telling myself it’s okay but feeling a sense of dread in the pit of my stomach, and the handle was the top of the pit…

“Alastor?” I called out again, once more not getting an answer, bringing my hands to my mouth when I heard a large thump out there, trying to keeping my composure… oh what the hell they know I’m here already. I went to turn the handle what the door got pushed in, had I been able to see what happened I would’ve seen Alastor in his demonic form and it probably would’ve scared the actual shit outta me… but NOPE

I went to open the door when it got pushed open and a bright blue flash covered all of my vision and made me feel… kinda tried… but I’m awake, almost like I’m not in my body… it’s… really hard……. To keep my….. keep my eyes …………………………….………open…….

• You collapsed to the floor slowly breathing, in a trance, feeling some sharper claws pick you up bridal style, if you weren’t so dazed out you would see Alastor frozen in time… like a paused TV… unable to get to you, or subdue your captor. You still had enough conscience to hear a muffled voice talking to a phone~

“Yeah we got her… foil chains worke—“

“Get her ba-“

“…. Longer you take the quicker……….. flasher wears-“

• Last thing you could remember hearing before completing falling out was a radio scramble in your brain, the sound going from a hollow scraggly to a tight scraggle- like turning the tv in between stations………

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AN: WELLLLL WHAT DID YA THINK???? Did you skip to down here or did you read the WHOLE thing. I really hope ya’ll like this, I’m so excited to make part 2, and maybe 3 or 4 depending on how far this goes.

Thank you to anyone who reads this and interacts in any way shape or form!!! Even if it’s just reading :) HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY AND REMEMBER

REALITY IS AN ILLUSION, THE UNIVERSE IS A HOLOGRAM BUY GOLD BYYYYYYEEEEEE

[fkbcorrector]

Hey all,

I'm officially leaving this blog, and tumblr as a whole, the constant growth of cis people inside this kink has completely ruined what this community was for me, it's impossible to come here and not see a post by a clearly bigoted cis person, no matter how much they claim it's just fantasy, they proceed to show their ignorance in many different ways. As a dom, I no longer find this place safe or attractive at all, staying away from bioessencialism is impossible since 70-80% of the posts are about biological aspects and it has severely deteriorated my mental health whenever I log on, hence why I haven't posted in a long time, and I won't be coming back.

No matter how much I created educational posts and fought for this to be a kinky space for all the traumatized trans people that deserve a safe space to express their most hidden disires, our oppressors have always find a way to claim it as their space, and since I am one of the few that fights against it, I'm constantly outnumber by these oppressors.

I'm glad I could help some of you, I think that's the only reason I actually tried to stay here longer, but I'm sorry, I can't keep myself in a space that gives genuely transphobic cis people a space to express their most hidden truths while pretending it's a fantasy, when deep down their wording and actions make it extremely clear it's not. And I know how happy they'll be seeing this post, they will feel as if they won, I won't be here anymore to fight them, and honestly even if they feel it's a win for them and it is true that it's a loss for the community, it's actually a win for me, as I'll be prioratizing my mental health. And a big f/y to all of them who are secretly happy to see me go.

The only thing I am unsure of is if I should delete the blog in its entirety, or leave it up in case any of you would like to keep the posts, including the educational resources I have made, if any of you could answer this, or dm me, or anything at all to make your opinion be heard, I'd appreciate it.

If there's no need for this blog to be up, or if I'm lacking feedback, I'll just delete it, I rather be long gone from this space, and I'd like to make it extremely clear it is not because of the hundreds of people I've made a connection with and helped, I appreciate you fighting for this community and for yourself, it's because once again cis people have taken yet another space that is ours to claim.

Thank you all and take care.

[smoshyourheadin]

Pls write an Ian hecox fluff fic where they are childhood friends!!

sunsets and swing sets

pairing: ian hecox x f! reader

a/n: honestly love ian like yeah my fav millenial!! requests open <3

the golden glow of the evening sun bathed the small suburban park in a warm, nostalgic light. it was a perfect summer evening, the kind that made ian’s heart swell with memories. he walked along the familiar path, gravel crunching under his sneakers, and smiled as he approached the old swing set.

sitting on one of the swings, gently swaying back and forth, was his childhood best friend, you. your hair shimmered in the sunset, and you looked up with a radiant smile as you saw him.

"ian! you made it!" you called, voice filled with joy.

ian quickened his pace and took the swing next to yours. "wouldn't miss it for the world," he said, pushing off the ground to start swinging. "remember how we used to race each other to see who could swing the highest?"

you laughed, a sweet, melodic sound that always made ian feel at home. "you always won, of course. but i still think i got better airtime."

you swung in comfortable silence for a few moments, the rhythm of the swings syncing up, as if you were still the carefree kids who had spent countless hours here. the park had seen your scraped knees, shared secrets, and dreams of the future. and here you were again, older but still holding on to that special bond.

"do you remember the summer we built that fort in the woods behind your house?" you asked, eyes sparkling with the memory.

ian chuckled. "how could I forget? we thought it was indestructible. until that storm came through and knocked it down."

"you were so mad," you teased. "I thought you were going to cry."

ian grinned sheepishly. "i might have, a little. but you were there to cheer me up. with those terrible cookies you baked."

"they weren't that bad!" you protested, nudging him with your shoulder. "okay, maybe they were. but you ate them anyway."

"i had to. you looked so proud."

they laughed together, the sound blending with the rustling leaves and distant chirps of crickets. as the sun dipped below the horizon, casting long shadows across the park, ian felt a wave of contentment wash over him.

"i’m glad we're still close," he said softly, looking at you. "after all these years."

your smile softened. "me too, ian. you've always been there for me. through everything."

"and you for me," he replied. "we might not be kids anymore, but I think this place will always feel like home because of you."

you reached out and took his hand, interlacing your fingers with his and giving a gentle squeeze. "here’s to many more years of sunsets and swing sets."

ian squeezed your hand back, his heart full. "yeah. many more."

you sat hand in hand for a while, eventually walking through the park with him.

at around nine, you decided to head back to your apartment. you stood with him for a moment before kissing his cheek gently, then turning to the front gate of the park.

he watched you go, his stomach turning as he watched the love of his life leave him behind again.

“hey, you coming?” you turned back to look at him.

“yeah,” he said with a shy smile, walking over to you.

“good. thought i’d have to leave you again.” you smirk at him, linking your arm in his.

[thegreatwizardelwin]

I Won’t Say I’m In Love - Part Three

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Joanne Harcourt x Male Reader

F/N L/N is a student in the Sapphire Owl house at Weston College. For some reason, he keeps running into a Scarlet Fox student in his day to day activities. Intrigued, he tries to learn more about him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was incredible to be a part of the Sapphire Miracle. 

You had been selected to participate for your house in the Weston cricket tournament. By calculations, strategy, sacrifice, and a touch of sheer dumb luck, the Sapphire Owl team rose to victory for the second time in Weston’s history. 

Things had quieted down since then…

Though you were currently being coddled by your family whilst also climbing- soaking wet- out of the water post-capsize. 

After a change of clothes, you and the team attended the closing ceremony.

You were congratulated by many of your family and friends, sipping lemonade and speaking with other visitors. Moore was ecstatic to introduce you to his own family, especially (wink) his sister; much to your dismay. But, as you talked, you found her company pleasant enough to consider her as friend material. 

At your age, it seemed that many boys were enjoying the presence of other respectable ladies. You noticed Harcourt dancing with one of them joyfully. He laughed at something she said, his face lighting up as you’d seen it do countless times.

A pang of jealousy hit you as you watched, feeling a certain hostility toward the girl. It only reminded you of how silly your affection really was. You were both boys, and you could never dance with him like that. 

Honestly, it was unfair for you to be upset about something so unchangeable. 

You convinced yourself to be happy for him. 

Perhaps they’d keep it up and one day you’d attend their…

You sighed, disrupting your own train of thoughts because of how disgruntled it made you. You would just learn to accept this, even if it took some time.

Moore’s sister found you again and noticed your expression was troubled.

“Is something the matter?” she asked.

“No, just a little tired.” you perked up, raising your cup to your lips.

“Oh, tired, I see.” 

You stood in silence, awkwardly watching others dance. You wondered if she wanted you to ask her to dance too, what with the way she idled beside you. 

It would clear my mind if I did… 

So, being the gentleman you were, you offered her the opportunity and she accepted.

You danced with Moore’s sister, her name being Theresa. By sheer accident, you nearly bumped into Harcourt and his partner. You looked at each other with surprise and laughed blissfully at the fact.

The night grew to a close, your mood having sincerely improved by the fun you had had.

You bid your farewells to your family and Theresa and then made your way back to the dormitory like the rest of the boys.

You walked down the halls of the school, chattering away with Moore and Blair.

As you got closer to the dorm, one of the boys poked your arm and gestured towards a figure waiting near the gates of the boarding house grounds.

It was Joanne Harcourt. He was still dressed in his clothes from earlier, fiddling with the boater hat in his hands.

Blair snickered.

“Finally gave in to your secret admirer, huh?” he elbowed you.

You gave him a threatening smile.

“Stop it!” you whispered, smacking his head. 

However you couldn’t just ignore the guy. You diverged from the group. They lowered their voices, muttering on about how close you and Harcourt had become for students in different houses.

Harcourt gave you a shy smile as you approached. You took your own hat off to be polite, tucking it under your arm. You kind of just stared at each other until the other boys were out of earshot.

“I’m really glad you won, L/N.” Harcourt said softly.

You laughed.

“I’m sorry about your teams… unfortunate circumstances. From what I did see, your spin balls were fantastic. I was super impressed!” you enthused. 

Harcourt blushed slightly with embarrassment at the memories of the “unfortunate circumstances” that befell his entire house on the field.

“Please don’t bring it up- ever again.” he hid his face in his palms. “A part of me died in that moment.”

You had to cover your mouth to stifle another laugh. You didn’t want to offend him by suggesting his miserable situation was humorous.

“I understand.” you replied, and then decided to change the subject. “I noticed you had a nice lass hanging on your arm tonight! I would’ve never thought you’d be such a charmer.” you teased.

Harcourt was amused.

“Well I noticed,” he paused, “that you didn’t seem very taken by the girl you danced with.”

You thought for a moment on how to respond. The reason why you had shown such indifference was too secret for Harcourt to know just yet. And it was certainly not something you were going to say outside, even if it was after dark. 

“I see women more as friends, right now. I prefer to focus on my other passions.” you said with a shrug. “What about you? Do you like them or are you just being a gentleman?”

That question caught Harcourt off guard. He froze up a bit, as if he were truly analyzing his own feelings.

“I- forgive me, L/N. I don’t mean to be rude. It’s getting late, I should go back to Scarlet Fox house.” he spilled, putting his hat back on.

Your face fell.

“Right, I suppose you should.” you muttered.

You both stood awkwardly, staring at each other as if you had forgotten the words “good night” existed. He glanced over at the walkway that would take him to his boarding house, then met your eyes once more. He bit his lip with uncertainty.

You straightened up.

“I feel bad that I couldn’t help you earlier.” you admitted. “I felt terrible just standing there on the field like I had grass for brains.”

Harcourt flushed again, crossing his arms.

“I told you not to bring it up again! Besides, if you were there with me I would have disintegrated completely. It was so embarrassing.” 

Taking a step forward, you clasped your hands behind your back.

“I know, but I… I want to help you!” you stressed. “ I just want you to be happy, Harcourt. You deserve it, in my book.”

Harcourt’s eyes shot to the ground. He seemed to relax a bit, taking a deep breath.

“Thank you, L/N. You’re kind.”

You reached over and playfully pulled his hat down over his eyes. He giggled, lifting the brim and peering at you. His smile could melt a glacier with how warm it made you feel.

Your eyes softened, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. Your fingers lingered there against his warm skin. He was clearly flustered by it. He reached up and held onto your wrist with both hands.

“If someone were to see us right now…” he trailed off nervously.

You slowly lowered your arm, your index finger curling around his in a promise.

“Until next time.” you murmured, bending and kissing his knuckle.

His jaw dropped, staring at you like he was a deer and you had stepped on a twig. There was a beat of silence as you let his hand go.

“You really just- you really- ? I’ll see you around!” he said quickly, shrinking away from you and hastening away with not another word.

You turned, heading into your dorm. As you entered the building, it was like the air around you was thin. What possessed you to do that? Didn’t you literally just say to yourself you were going to let it go? And what did his reaction mean?

Your smile faltered.

I might have just ruined our relationship with that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I feel like every part of this fic ends with Harcourt running off like a little gerbil or something.

Planning on maybe 2 more parts of Joanne? I wanna write a maurice cole fic where the reader is just as ✨devious✨ 🌺

[ilovetheriddler]

Ehehe, I loved the Arkham Eddie fic! I would love to see a sequel where they sleep together, and other than that I’d just leave it up to you! The fic is your oyster, anything you’d like and I’ll love it!

:)

Smiley! I'm glad you liked it! It was really enjoyable to write, and I'll happily do a sequel! I hope that you enjoy it!

Fulfilled Desires.

(Arkham Games) Edward Nigma x F!Reader.

Word Count: 1,610.

Contents: 🔞NSFW 18+! Slight degradation, praise, slightly rougher sex.

It had been a few months since you were put in that position where you had to work alongside him, and he had only gotten worse in that time. Originally, he used to harrass and torment batman nonstop with riddles and puzzles, but now he was focusing on you instead! It baffled you. Did you really piss him off that much with what you said back then? You couldn't have, not to the extent of his determination to seemingly trap you.

Why? You weren't sure. Perhaps to humiliate you, mock you, insult you, heck, maybe even just outright kill you! Eddie was incredibly difficult to predict and read sometimes, and it terrified you. But it also turned you a bit on as well, much to your frustration.

Yes, that's right. You'd found yourself somewhat drawn to the grease covered, stained shirt wearing, question mark motif, riddle loving menace himself. As a hero, you'd honestly rather die than admit it outloud.

And now here you were, tangled up in a net that was a part of his latest scheme. You let out a frustrated sigh as you noticed the man of the hour himself walk in, the same smug look he always had on his face.

"Well, it seems you've gotten yourself.... a bit stuck in one of my puzzles again, doesn't it?"

"Oh, shut it, Eddie, I'm getting sick and tired of your puzzles! Can't you just go back to bothering Batman instead?!"

"Unfortunately, I can't, The Caped Crusader is incapable of giving me what I want, what I desire...."

You gave him a somewhat curious yet also still annoyed glance.

"And what exactly is it that you want?"

"Oh, it's very simple.... I want you."

"E-Excuse me?!"

Your eyes went wide as Edward slowly and carefully approached the net you were trapped in, leaning against the wall nearby as he took in your current state. An amused chuckle slipped past his lips before he spoke again.

"You heard me, I want you, and to clarify further as to not confuse you more, I mean sexually, carnally, physically, whatever way you want to phrase it!"

You soaked in his words for a few moments, your thoughts running wild at what they meant. On one hand, you should be appalled by them as a hero, on the other hand, you really wanted to be fucked by the riddler. The latter won out, though, after some thought.

"....Alright then, I'll have sex with you."

"W-wait, that actually worked?! I mean, of course it worked! There's no one who could resist my irresistible charm!"

Edward immediately got started on cutting you out of the net. You watched him closely, observing the way that the sweat dripped down his decently strong forearms. Damn, this became a better and better decision the more you thought about it. The moment the net was loose, he quickly picked you up in his arms, carrying you through his lair and to his rundown bedroom with a quickness that was honestly kind of terrifying.

He set you down on his bed and stood there for a moment, a focused expression present on his face.

"Um... Eddie? What are you doing?"

"Quiet, I'm thinking! I've thought about how this would go several times before, yet I want to make sure that I have it perfect in my mind beforehand!"

You moved back on the bed to lie down, shrugging off your jacket and tossing it to the floor as you did. Eventually, he seemed to work out whatever scenario he had in his head because he removed his button-up question mark shirt, moving up onto the bed, crawling on top of you.

"Now, my dear.... before we start, I want you to tell me something."

"Okay, what?"

"Tell me that I'm better than every one of those so-called heroes that you work alongside, that I'm superior in every conceivable way!"

You sighed a bit in annoyance, rolling your eyes.

"Fine, oh Eddie! You're better than all those stupid heroes. You're so intelligent and superior to them in every way! ....There, Happy?"

"Overjoyed, now... I suppose there's no time to waste, hmm?"

You were about to respond, but your words died in your throat as his lips crashed onto yours, in a rough and messy entanglement. His hands yanked on your hair, causing you to moan as he slipped his tongue into your mouth, exploring the area with a mixture of methodical interest and frenzied passion. After a few seconds, he pulled away, leaving you gasping frantically for air, a small trail of saliva just barely connecting your mouths.

"Look at you, you're already a mess, and I haven't even really done anything yet. It's frankly pathetic!"

You felt your face heat up in humiliation as a needy whine escaped you. As much as you didn't want to admit it, you loved his mocking tone, his harsh words. they turned you on more than they should have. His eyes seemed to light up as he realized how much you enjoyed it.

"Oh, I see. You like being degraded, don't you? Or is it only when it's me degrading you? Hmm?"

"Perhaps I do. Is that a problem?"

"Absolutely not, my dear! It's perfect...."

He slowly kisses your jaw before moving down along your neck and to your shoulder, leaving harsh kisses and occasional bites. You let out a surprised and slightly alarmed yelp as he tore off your shirt. Tossing the remnants of it on the floor.

"Damn it, Eddie! W-would it have killed you to just unbutton it?!"

"It would have taken too long, I don't want to waste my time on pointless efforts! However, I do have to appreciate the fact that you didn't wear a bra today. It saves me a few seconds of time."

His mouth moves down to your chest, one of his hands reaching up and cupping one of your breasts, giving it a firm squeeze as he watched your face to take in your reaction, your cute gasps and sounds. You move your hands to the edge of his filthy tank top, attempting to pull it off him. He graciously lifted his arms to help you as you pulled it over his head and threw it off to wherever it ultimately landed.

You could feel your mouth practically watering as you gazed upon his bare chest. The sight of his unkempt course chest hair causing you to feel more aroused than you hypothetically thought it would. Your eyes drift down to the trail of hair leading into his pants. Of course, since your eyes were already glancing down there, you couldn't help but stare at the already extremely pronounced erection straining against the front of his pants.

"...Are you really that desperate sweetheart? Your mouth is practically watering.... do you really need it that badly?"

"S-shut up! I..I was just distracted..."

He hooks his fingers into the waistband of both your pants and underwear and pulled them off quickly, discarding them in the floor. Firmly grasping your thighs and spreading them apart, licking his lips slightly as he took in the sight of your dripping sex.

After a few moments of staring, he dipped his head down, burying his face in between your legs, eagerly lapping at your arousal. A loud whine escaped you as his tongue dipped inside.

"A-ah... Eddie....."

Your eyes went wide as he added one of his fingers along with his focused efforts of devouring you. Pleased and needy groans occasionally, leaving his lips and sending shivers up your spine.

A desperate and frustrated whine left you as he suddenly stopped and pulled back slightly. He looked up at you, his eyes dark with his desire and lust for you in this moment.

"Aw... Are you unsatisfied? Do you want more?"

"...Y-yes.... please...."

"Good girl.... do you need my cock? Is that what you need so badly?"

You nodded eagerly. If he didn't stop teasing you, then you were going to lose it. He chuckled at your needy and frustrated state as he quickly unbuckled his belts, pulling them from the loops and yanking his pants and boxers down, his hard cock springing up as it was freed from its previously constrained fabric. He wrapped your legs losesly around his waist.

"Now... Riddle me this, What is wet, whiney, and in desperate need of something hard?"

"... Is it me?"

He let out an amused chuckle before harshly thrusting into you.

"That's correct!"

He set a brutal and unforgiving pace that left you breathless and practically overwhelmed with pleasure. The addictive feeling of his cock hammering in and out of you has you already near the edge. He hisses out in between moans.

"F-fuck!...you feel so good, like you were made just for me...."

Your nails dig into his back as you try to hold onto him, a melody of moans, whimpers, and whines escape you, only serving to add to his ego. His breath fans over your ear.

"It feels good, doesn't it? Being so full of my cock? I'm the only one that could make you feel like this, aren't i?!"

You nod frantically as you're pushed over the edge, screaming out his name as you climax, his own following shortly after, with a tight grip on your hips and a broken moan he empties his cum into you, slowly starting to slow down his frantic thrusts as he comes down from the feeling.

He pulled out of you and rolled over to lay next to you, catching his breath as he presses a few surprisingly gentle and sweet kisses to your forehead, holding you close to him.

[fruitycutie]

Debate thoughts and quickie analysis!

The main reason Democrat and Republican debates have been historically frustrating is because it's always: Step 1: Republican makes outlandish, false claim about democrats or immigrants or what have you! Step 2: The Democrat responds with, "well no, actually, um" and doesn't actually face or address how INSANE Republican statements are in the first place. Step 3: The Republican, having already won, sneers the whole time and controls the conversation. This has been the case for 90% of recent american history. I am glad to see that that is NOT the case anymore. Kamala is actually doing really good, AND the moderators were on point, too. Like, for example, actually asking critical questions to both, and providing fact checks when Trump says that immigrants are EATING YOUR PETS, Substantiating that they already talked to the mayor of Springfield, Ohio and that there is absolutely no evidence found of something that- lets face it- is just one person's brain worms. It spread from one person's probably ill mind, and became a MAJOR REPUBLICAN POINT! It's that easy. And now it's completely gone because of course it is, its a total fabrication and in 2024 those don't fly anymore because we don't live in ignorance of Trump's strategies anymore. This whole thing just shows how desperate, vile and awful they are, that this is ALL they have after all. Honestly though, just seeing the people making bullshit up on the defensive is great! So I enjoyed the debate a lot. That being said, I want to talk about the fact that I was also pleasantly surprised. I expected it to be more 50/50, truth be told. I do think Kamala, like any other Dem, has a little bit of liberal syndrome - which is pretty standard for Democrats, it's just their bread and butter weakness, but she's definitely the best in that regard - which is why she's actually doing well! What do I mean by that? Well, it's simple. Democrats make this mistake of thinking that they're as equally left as Republicans are right - which is only a little bit, in this theory - and we can unite as a people, if we just try. Meanwhile, the reality of the situation is that the Democrats live in the real world, where people matter and policies affect them, while to be completely honest, Republicans live in the AI power fantasy where the Shadow Qabbal Border Tzar Trans Alien Prison Immigrants from Mexico are killing every aspect of the american dream you love and schools are where your Children transition by Force, you can trademark half of those buzzwords if you want. And you damn well know that if it were convenient for them, they'd include Jews in that, too. The point is, that is fundamentally not something you can compromise with. Because to compromise with something, it has to like, already exist in REALITY, right? And their ideas just don't. To summarize I guess, the main mistake Dems make is that they believe they'll get more of the Republican voter base if they move right slightly. BUT THAT NEVER WORKS!!! Because, the people voting for trump are ALL cultists, who are stuck up their own ass about emotional messaging and DO NOT care for empiricism, DO NOT care for results or outcomes, all they care about is being right that trump is their american savior. After all, as soon as Trump lost in 2020- a verifiable fact with NO room for empirical debate without changing the meaning of the word "lose", a shitstorm of false accusations about the election being stolen happened, the Capitol riot happened, not to mention even that Trump keeps promising that if he gets elected, nobody will have to vote again. Like - come on, it's so transparently fascism, to the point where even the most irrationally opposed to the term have to see it. You cannot reason or compromise with people like that, it's just not possible. Kamala has been better about this than all democrats up to her, easily, but she's still not perfect. And I hope this is completely understood by democrats going forward, if the Republican enstablishment doesn't change it's ways.

[navree]

I wish that I could still enjoy Rhaenicent like you ... but man, this fandom and the show has burned me on that ship. The overwhelming majority of people dislike Alicent and want her to be subservient to Rhaenyra instead of allowing her to be a complex character in her own right. It's just not the "toxic yuri" or the actual "lesbian divorce drama" that I would've liked where both characters can stand solidly on their won, but I am genuinely glad that there is still a popular femslash ship that can capture people's attention. At least there's more canonical F/F ships in the book, so that's nice.

I get that, but I've managed for the most part to avoid those people and honestly most of the Rhaenicent shippers I've seen are just diehard Alicent fans who have also glommed onto Rhaenyra because Alicent loves her. Like at most they're a bit mean to Alicent's kids, which can annoy me as those kids are My Kids as well, but imma be real I'm choosing a woman over a man every time, if it's a fight between Aegon or Aemond and Alicent, Alicent wins for me, even tho I love those two. But my corner of Rhaenicent is literally just people who like both women and who view them as able to both stand on their own two feet, so I've maintained myself as perfectly content. Plus, it is nice to not only have a popular femslash ship but also one that is baked into the text rather than fandom gone wild. Like, don't get me wrong, the writing on this show is flawed at the best and really bad at the worst, and when it comes to Rhaenicent that's still true (there's a lot of stuff they could have done better), but this relationship still very intentional and being created with the goal of being the centerpiece of the show, and it's been like that since day one.

And ultimately, my superhuman immunity to peer pressure means that I don't base my opinion on other people's at all, so even if people act annoying, it still takes a LOT for that to affect my own personal views on something.

[danses-with-dogmeat]

F is for -- Fawkes

I'm so glad he won this poll, honestly. Writing for Fawkes just gives me life <3

Also, holy crap, I gasped when I drew this line for him from the dialogue prompts. It's perfect.

Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this bit of sweetness as much as I loved writing it! 😊

Literally was so excited for this one, that it was the first of the 2k celebration prompts that I started

And here is the 2k event masterlist, for your browsing pleasure!

--

Pair: Fawkes x F!Lone

Dialogue: “I never knew that I could feel this loved."

Word: Forever

Rating: SFW

Category: Fluff

Word Count: 1k

Fawkes grinned as he ducked through the threshold of the front door, nodding approvingly at the smooth way the hinges yielded so easily as he closed the door behind him. 

So many improvements to make still, and yet… This dwelling is more of a home than any place I’ve found myself in prior. 

Or any Lone has lived in. 

That thought comforted him as he moved towards the kitchen, a mouthwatering smell drifting to his marred nose he rounded the corner. At the same time, gentle music sounded from the radio sitting on the counter, lulling him further into this sense of domestic bliss. He sighed as his eyes caught Lone’s form, as she floated from the fridge to the stove, and, not for the first time in the months since the Enclave were wiped out and Project Purity was finally completed, he found himself wondering if he were dreaming. 

After all they had gone through, the trials, the violence, the loss… He wondered if it would ever be possible for the pair to move on, for his Lone, his love… to be happy. As with most situations though, Lone defied all that Fawkes believed was possible. She went beyond his hopes and dreams for her, conquered everything the cruel wasteland threw at her, cared for him so wholly, even as he continued being unable to fathom such things, and now…here they were. 

Existing peacefully; cooking, gardening, reading, dancing, living, in a way the supermutant had never imagined anyone could, so close to the horrors permeating the Capital Wasteland. The way anyone could here, now. Maybe before the bombs and the vaults, the raiding and the wars, the existence of what he’s become, and what Lone has always, not overlooked, but embraced more gracefully than he, himself ever could. 

It was something that Fawkes had no words for.

The gratitude he felt. The affection he held for her was more sacred than anything else he could imagine in his long life, and yet still, it paled in comparison to her own, if she could love him, the way he was now. 

Lone was humming along to the tunes drifting through the air as Fawkes quietly approached from behind, her body jolting only slightly as he lightly placed his hands at her hips and laid a kiss to her head. 

“Anyone else would’ve hit you with their spoon if you snuck up on them like that.” She said with narrow eyes turned to him, and a chuckle rumbled through his chest. 

“That is why I risked it, you see. For even the wrath of your wooden spoon could not deter my show of affection for you.” Fawkes lowered his head in time for his eyes to catch the smile that spread her lips as he spoke. 

“That so, huh?” She continued stirring the vegetables in the pan before her, even as Fawkes nuzzled further into her soft hair. 

He just couldn’t help but be close to her. 

Ever since that fateful day at the Jefferson Memorial, when he’d nearly lost her, he relished Lone being beside him, within his reach. 

She giggled at the way his breath tickled her skin. 

“What’s all this for, love?” She turned around in his embrace, leaving the spoon in the pan as she faced him, and wrapping her own arms around his broader waist. “Really, it’s just dinner, you don't have to act like I'm making miracles in here…” 

Fawkes shook his head as he looked down at her, raising one hand to gently move a stray hair from her face. 

“Do you know the date, Lone?” 

Her brows furrowed at that as she looked blankly towards his chest, as though the answer could be found there. 

“Six months ago, today, we decided to move forward in our relationship.” 

“Only six months?” Her eyes widened, and he felt her body stiffen in his embrace. “It feels like it’s been so much longer than that… all that’s happened…” 

“I know.” He said softly, as he stroked his thumb over her cheek. 

“I’m sorry, I just… How could I have forgotten? Are you sure?” 

Lone looked worried now, and Fawkes felt a pang in his chest. 

“I am certain, yes, but… It’s as you said. So much has happened, so much that you’ve been through in such a short time. I would never blame you, I… I only realized myself when I was in the garden.” 

“Well, dammit. If I’d known, I would’ve planned something. Something to celebrate, you know?” 

“Being here with you now…” Fawkes tightened his embrace, folding her into his arms until she nearly vanished within his bulk, “It is celebration enough, my dear.” 

“I know, but…” She trailed off as she hugged him back, her face pressed firmly to his chest, arms wrapped about him so tightly, her fingers could almost reach each other behind him. “We’re together all the time, and as wonderful as that is, I don’t know… It doesn’t feel like enough.”

“Lone.” Fawkes felt another ache in his chest as he pulled back, leaning down to look her earnestly in the eye as both hands released her waist in favor of caressing her face gently. “I assure you, it is more than enough. To be with you this way… I never knew I could feel this loved. I hardly knew what the word meant before you, and every day that I spend with you by my side quickly becomes my fondest memory.” 

Her hands moved to smooth over the backs of his as she grinned tearily, her cheeks squishing beneath the pressure of both their touches so endearingly, Fawkes couldn’t help but press forward to capture her sweet lips in a chaste kiss. 

Quickly, before he could properly pull away, her hands opted to bring his face closer to hers, before wrapping about the bulk of his shoulders, drawing him nearer as she prolonged the tender contact. 

Fawkes’s chest warmed now, at the feeling of her, and he knew that he was telling her the pure, and honest truth. 

This, right here. It was more than enough. 

[xxkitty13]

Vampire AU pt. 9

Vampire Law x Human Luffy

Previous -> Part 8

Luffy’s nostrils twitched at the aroma in the air. His eyes pop wide open as his stomach begins to grumble from the unknown smell. He rises from his slumber and finds himself sitting on a bed.

"Where am I?" he mumbles to himself.

He yawns, stretching his tight muscles and looks around the dark room. It seems to be the Royal Palace, did Doflamingo capture them? No, he won. Questions begin to pop in his mind as he sees another bed in front of him. A visible lump on the bed shifts underneath the blankets. It appears he's not alone.

Luffy removes the sheets over him and makes his way over to the other side of the room. Whoever is under the blankets is curled like a ball. He proceeds to remove the blanket and to his surprise, it’s Law. The vampire sleeps peacefully, hugging a pillow tightly.

"Torao," Luffy whispers, shaking his arm gently.

Law begins to open his eyelids, revealing his stunning golden orbs. His vision becomes more focused and his met with the grin of his mate.

"Mugi?" he groans, holding his head. "W-what happened?"

The younger pirate furrows his eyebrows, he too confused at the state they're in. "I dunno. I'm just glad to have my hat and that you're here with me," he smiles, pressing on his straw hat. Then, another random whiff of that delicious aroma goes under his nostrils once more, cranking his hunger. "Come on, get up. We have to find out what smells so good!"

He yanks the older's right arm, but Law cries out in pain.

"Ahh!" he screams.

Luffy immediately let's go and is shocked at the sudden wails from his mate. "Oh, sorry. . . I didn't mean to hurt you," guilt present in his voice.

Law grips on his upper arm, there's bandages, and blood is still fresh. His memories resurface from the day before. The whole fight with Doflamingo, he passed out during the battle, he swore he had died. Now, he's alive and his arm is reattached to his body. Most importantly, this mean Luffy defeated Doflamingo.

"M-my arm, how is it back on me?" he questions, looking at his mate.

"Oh, that. I found your crew and they stitched you right back up. I honestly thought you died on me there," he grins.

"How can you say that so lightly?" Law sighs, rolling his eyes.

The vampire removes his blanket and reveals the bandages that cover his body. He attempts to move his limbs, but his body feels like it has been in a wreck. "You have more injuries than me, how come you are up?"

Luffy only shrugs. "I guess I just a good night's sleep."

"Unbelievable,"— he sighs again— "you're truly remarkable Luffy-ya."

The younger blushes and scratches the back of his head. "Ya think so? I only won because of you."

"Don't make me laugh Mugi. That was all you. You're much stronger than me. . ." his voice mumbles at the end. He grips the bed sheets and looks out the window. "You know. . . I was supposed to be one saving you."

"What do you mean Torao? You're pretty strong too."

Frustrated, Law shifts his whole body to the side. "Y-you just don't get it."

Luffy looks concern and sits next to him, gently rubbing his stitched arm. He can feel his muscles tense under the bandages.

“Tell me. What’s wrong?”

Law looks at him by the corner of his eyes, hesitant to speak. Luffy goes to press on his arm, ever so gently, darkening his gaze. The tension in the room rises as the silence continues. Then, Law finally breaks the silence.

“I-I wanted to be the one to protect you,”— he lowers his head— “not the other way around.”

The grip loosens on the vampire’s arm.

“Torao, there’s nothing wrong with that.”

A small huff comes out of the vampire’s mouth. He grits his teeth, displeased at the reality of the situation. The truth is, he is angry that he is weaker than his mate; after all, he is the “dom.”

“Stop sulking,” his young mate pouts.

“You would you still be with me if I’m weak?”

Luffy rolls his eyes and swiftly embraces the older in his arms. Law winces at the sudden rough touch, his body sore from the previous beating. He avoids the human’s gaze, still ashamed at the predicament, but Luffy cusps his face. They lock eyes, one pair showing devoting love and the other beaming with self-loathing.

“We’re not doing this again.” Luffy kisses the tears unbeknownst to Law. The vampire quickly wipes them off, but the human stops him. “It’s okay to be weak. I will always love you. You shouldn’t be ashamed, even if I am stronger, I will always submit to you,” he says softly, pecking Law’s lips.

Luffy gives him a small smile. "Though, I'm not sure we have the same definition of submitting," he chuckles slightly.

The vampire scoffs with a giggle. "You sure about that?"

"Well, at the moment you can barely move. So, who do you think is in control?" he teases. Law tries to move his arm to grab Luffy's throat, but a sharp pain stops him.

Luffy laughs at his failed attempt. "See. Anyway, let's get going, I'm starving." He dashes out the room with his damsel in distress and follows the lingering scent.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖౨ৎ.𖥔 ݁ ˖-`♡´-.𖥔 ݁ ˖౨ৎ.𖥔

The scrumptious aroma that intrigued Luffy happened to be a banquet made for their crews' bravery. The king of Dressrosa wanted to feed his saviors. Local cuisines filled the tabletop alongside with high-quality aged wines and other non-alcoholic beverages.

Luffy was angry at first, that no one woke him up to enjoy the food the king has offered. That feeling quickly faded once Sanji showed him the large T-bone steak and various meats cooked to perfection. Everyone ate, laughed, drank, and some shed a few tears. At the end of the banquet, everyone began to disperse to walk off the huge meal they ate. Luffy rubbed his enlarged belly and was about to grab the last cookie on the platter when someone called his name.

“Luffy-ya, follow me," Law whispered from behind.

The straw hat whipped his head, dropping the cookie back on the platter. “Huh, where to?”

“There’s something I want to show you.”

“Oh, okay!” He gets up from his chair and happily follows after the vampire. "Wait, can you walk on your own?"

"I'm fine, let's go before someone bothers us."

The two men leave the dining hall and exit to the large hallways of the palace. Law leads Luffy to the lower levels, going deeper and deeper into the non-populated sections. After going through multiple turns and descends, Law stops in front of a red door.

"We're here."

Law twists the doorknob and opens the strange door, it creaks, revealing a dim-lit room. Something about this felt like DeJa'Vu to Luffy, almost like he experienced this before. He brushed the feeling off and stepped inside. Once inside, candles lit around the area showing rows of books on shelves.

“So, what is this place?” Luffy cocks his head, eyes trailing to the intricate designs of the shelves and surrounding furniture.

“This is Doflamingo’s side of the castle. He renovated the place to add a sense of home. I guess the celestial dragons had a dark taste in architecture.”

“You mean vampirey?”

“Yes, that. I hate to admit it, but the dark vibe is comforting. I’ve only been here a few times. . . I wonder if he still has that room. . .”

"What room?"

The vampire dismisses the question. "Don't worry about it. I think it's too obscene for what I'm planning. . ." Silence follows shortly after. Recollecting his thoughts, Law walks up to one of the bookshelves. “I used to read here. There are so many books about the human body.”

Luffy takes a peek at the book Law holds open. "Oh. . ." His eyes focused on the sketched drawing of the human heart and its realistic dissection.

"The human body is beautiful, isn't it Mugi?" The vampire's golden eyes stare back at the human's dark ones. It is a tense feeling, making Luffy gulp.

Law closes the book and places it back on the shelf. “I grabbed these from the kitchen.” He pulls out a rectangular item from his jacket, a box of chocolates.

“They’re fine chocolates with cherry filling. I know you mentioned that you don’t like cherry pie, but this is different.”

“Hmm, that’s okay. I don’t think it should taste that bad.” Luff shrugs.

The vampire walks over to the middle of the small room where an antique chaise lounge couch is located at. Law goes to sit near the rolled arm of the black leather couch, patting the spot next to him. Getting the signal, Luffy follows after him and takes a seat at the old sofa. Law then hands him the box of chocolates and gets up to light the candles around them. When he returns, his mate has already devoured half the box.

Law smacks him. “Don’t eat them all!”

Luffy winces at the slight pain on his wrist and pouts, throwing the candy wrappers onto the floor.

"Don't make that face. Anyway, scoot closer," the vampire commands.

Law grabs one of the chocolates and unwraps it. He places it in his mouth, biting it in place. He moves his head forward and grabs Luffy by the back of his head, he pushes their heads together, feeding it to Luffy. The red filling ruptures inside their mouths, covering their tongues with the delicious taste of cherry. The kiss ends in a pop as both slurp the sugary treat down their throats.

Luffy is too stunned to move. Flustered by the action, his face reddens from the erotic kiss. Law only smirks at his reaction. He goes to wipe the small brown stain besides his mate's lower lip, his thumb runs over his pink lip, gently rubbing the smooth skin. Luffy doesn't break eye contact with him, his heart fluttering at every gesture.

"What? Cat got your tongue?" the vampire teases, cupping his face.

The younger shyly looks away, but Law quickly turns his head back. His half-lidded golden eyes spark a tingly sensation down Luffy's groin. The rapid blood rush is not unnoticed as Law gropes the growing bulge.

"Do you want another taste?" he sultry whispers, staring into his lovely doe eyes.

Luffy doesn't responds at first, hypnotized by his lustful gaze, but slowly nods his head as his answer. Law grabs another chocolate from the box and again places it between his teeth. He leans forward and pushes the candy inside Luffy's mouth. This time, the sticky filling runs down their lips, making a mess as it drips. Law licks any remaining syrup off his mate's face, making sure to leave his skin clean. Before Luffy could register anything else, Law shoves his tongue down his throat.

The vampire holds his head with both hands, pressing their faces firmly together. Their tongues swirl against each other, the soft muscles gliding smoothly across one another.

To caught up in the kiss, Law falls back, placing Luffy ontop of him. He grunts at the sudden weight; his injured body still tender from his fight. The kiss stops as Luffy becomes weary from the look of pain in Law's face.

"Are you okay, I should get off."

"No, it's fine,” he huffs out, holding Luffy in place. His hands run down to his hips, adjusting him on his crotch.

"I was thinking. . ."— he looks at him— "let's change it up for once."

Luffy raises his brows in curiosity. "Hmm, how come?"

"I want you to be on top of me tonight. After all, my body is not in the best condition to plow your fine ass," he says, smacking his bottom.

"Ride me. Your way."

Oh that sparked something devious inside of Luffy. He smirks. "My way?"— his weight presses against Law's crotch— "Fine, I'll make you regret that."

"Bring it on," Law taunts.

Luffy immediately lean over, dropping his torso over Law’s hard built abs. His face is only centimeters away from the older, enough for their lips to touch, but the boop of their noses impede it. Their breaths are heavy and warm, a cocky smiles plasters on the younger’s face.

He carefully avoids touching lips, sliding himself down to the vampire’s neck. A small peck is given near his Adam’s apple and more follow down to his chest. Luffy unbuttons the shirt as he works his way down his abdomen. He’s careful to avoid his injuries, trying not to mess with the bandages.

Law tightens his core, loving the fluttering touch of his mate’s pretty lips on his skin. The wet kisses trail down further, closing in on his navel and soon, dangerously close to his v-line. The hair underneath Law's bellybutton tickle Luffy's lips, the soft fluff of hair guides him to the seam of the pants. Using his mouth, Luffy unbuttons the pants and drags the zipper down, revealing the boxers underneath.

The bulge under the cotton cloth is ready to pop. With a seductive look, Luffy looks at Law for a brief moment and dives back down, bitting the seam of the boxers. He pulls them down in a swift movement and the erect member springs right out. The cold air makes the vampire hitch.

"Oh, squeamish aren't you?" Luffy chuckles.

"S-shut up and suck me already." Law grabs the back of his head and attempts to push him down, but Luffy doesn't budge.

The younger ticks his tongue and shakes his head in disappointment. "I thought we were doing this my way." He looks at him, with a cunning grin, and wraps his hand around veiny member. The vampire groans as the grip tightens around his needy shaft. "You're too injured to fight back. This will be fun, wouldn't it?"

Law continued to breathe heavily. Cleary, he has made a mistake. The tone of his lover's voice hints of a suspicious plan. Whatever it is, he knows he is not ready for it.

Satisfied by the vampire's submission, Luffy proceeds to slowly jerk him off.

The vampire knew he was toying with him. He bites his lip, watching the human play with his dry and painful erection. "Luffy-ya," he huffs in desperation.

Luffy rolls his eyes. "You can't wait, huh? Fine, I'll give you what you want."

Holding the shaft steady, he nears his face to the glistening pink tip. His tongue steadily slides over the pre-cum layer on the small slit. Law becomes tense at the touch as his dick begins to pulsate. The teasing continues with every kitten lick over the oozing slit. Law's flushed face turns Luffy on, making him eager to take more of his needy erection.

Having enough of the little game, Luffy suddenly bobbles down on the enlarged cock.

"Oh fuck," Law moans out, dropping his head back.

When it came to giving head, Luffy is another level. His unfathomable hunger has no limits, he takes him whole, leaving no area untouched. It was incredible, feeling his cock hit the deepest part of his mate's throat. In all honesty, he could cum at any given moment, but that would only ruin the fun. Though, Luffy is making it hard to resist.

Luffy fondles his balls as his mouth works it magic. His tongue glides past his thick veins and around the shaft. He holds back his tears, to the point where he stretches his throat to take in more the girthy dick. One could say he was cheating, but why make it harder on yourself. He continues to suck the throbbing cock, making sure to jerk him off at the base while simultaneously deep throating him.

"Luffy, oh— don't stop."

The vampire's moans were music to his ears. Hearing his deep and pleading voice sent an electric flutter in his stomach and into his lower region.

His loud slurps fill the room as he makes a mess, saliva pooling at the bottom of the dick. Law loved the sloppy mess that he would leave, beautifully lubricating his erection. Each bob tightens his core, being sent to a blissful state when his tip touched the back of his throat. It's to the point where the feeling becomes unbearable, and a wrenching buildup arises.

Law's breaths are more profound than before. His mind is gone, only thinking about the pleasurable state that he is in. Luffy bobs his head faster, knowing that Law's orgasm is close. He works diligently, taking his member whole. Many would think that it is a tiring task, but to him, it was a game. To see how long it would take for his lover to paint his tongue clear white. He loved every second of it, the taste of his salty skin, the girth, the gagging feeling in his throat, and most importantly, the screaming of his name.

Shortly after, Law takes a deep breath in and tries to thrust in his mouth. He wines, calling out his name as he spills his cum into his abused mouth. Luffy has won his little game, and is satisfied with his prize.

"Luffy,"— Law pants— "I-I think I'm done."

The human wipes his mouth, already finished swallowing his seed, and gives him a malicious smile. "Done? We're just getting started."

"Wh-"

Before the vampire could speak, Luffy pounced on him and attacked his chapped lips. The kiss deepens, the two entangling themselves, feeling up on one another. Luffy breaks free from the surprise kiss, a trail of saliva still connecting each other, and takes a moment to breathe. He gives him a smug look, wiping his mouth, and chuckles.

Law is taken aback and doesn't mutter a word. Luffy sits on his torso, careful not to sit on his wounds, and looks behind him. The erect member stands proudly behind his ass, Luffy slowly pushes himself against it, smiling back at him.

"So that was your plan, huh?" he hitches.

Luffy smiles. "Maybe."

He then proceeds to slide back, almost crushing the soft genital, enough for Law to wince at the slight pain.

"Careful, that hurts you know."

The younger only laughs. "Yeah, yeah, you'll be alright." He stops and sits right before the member. His hands make way to his shorts and slides them down his legs, along with his briefs.

His own cock stands up, just grazing over Law's. The feeling is soothing, both of their blood-filled erections touching, it only agitated them more. Not wanting to wait any longer, Luffy lifts himself with his legs, aligning himself over Law's aching cock. Though he is not prepped, his devil fruit helps him with that issue. Now over the member, Luffy slowly lets himself sink onto Law's thick cock.

"Fuck—" Law throws his head back, tightly grabbing onto Luffy's thighs, feeling himself be sucked in. Due to his devil fruit, his grip and tightness were on another level. Law didn't know if he should feel blessed or not; regardless, the pleasure is immense.

Luffy finally sinks down to the base of the shaft to where his balls touch his bottom's skin. He lifts his ass up and immediately lets it go back down, not caring for his roughness. His hands trail to the vampire's biceps, holding them for support as he rides the hard cock. The feeling is amazing, having control on how hard the tip hits his g-spot, it is an electrifying sensation jolting through his body.

Law could only moan nonsense as he is fucked to oblivion. The tight hole takes him well, giving a nice pressure around his throbbing dick.

"Shit, you feel fucking amazing," Law moaned through pants, watching Luffy bounce on his thick cock.

Luffy was beginning to lose himself, as his own cock throbbed with pleasure. Each hit to his g-spot drove him crazy, wanting nothing more than to be filled with the vampire's hot seed. His eyes rolled back as his riding became sloppy. Law finally had the strength to take some sort of measure of the situation, using his grip on Luffy's hips to add assistance.

The vampire's hands trail to the human's ass, guiding him to ride his erection. The two match their breathing, loving the good fuck in the secluded room. Just the two of them, fucking to their hearts content. Law couldn't hold back and even through the pain, he bucked his hips up, hitting Luffy's g-spot hard.

"Ah—" Luffy yelps at the sudden force. His body falls forward, but he holds himself up over Law's shoulders. He stops riding him and let's Law fuck him to this own pace— fast.

Law plowed him well, making sure that his abused cock his milked by Luffy's tight ass. It was like a vacuum, the grip impeccable and strong. He feels his core tighten once more, knowing that he is about reach another orgasm. He holds Luffy dear, pulling his hair for their faces to meet. They kiss, moaning in each other's mouths.

Law pulls away for a moment, fastening his face and repeatedly moaning out, "I love you."

"I-I love you too," Luffy manages to say, cum spilling on Law’s chest,

With one more thrust, Law finally came, shooting his hot cum into the beaten hole. The exhausted human falls on top of the other, satisfied with the good fuck.

"I-I'm knocking out," Luffy wines.

Law, who is sucked dry, barely opens his eyes. "You're one to talk," he heaves, trying to clean the white liquid over his abdomen.

Luffy stretches his arm to grab a tissue from the other side of the room and hands it to Law. “Sorry about that, I couldn’t hold it back,” he mumbles, nuzzling his face on the crook of his neck,

Happily, Law embraces the smaller male, trailing his hands over his drowsy face. "Good night Mugi, sleep tight." He kisses his forehead and watches him drift to sleep.

He stays awake, hearing the soothing flicks of the candles in the room. Tomorrow they will depart once again. Another dangerous scheme lies ahead of them, maybe more life threatening than Doflamingo, but's that is future him problem. Right now, all he wants to do is to keep his little human in his arms.

[cielsosinfel]

It's been a while since I've written a Reading Log update, but that's because it's been a while since I finished a book. I've been doing so much reading and stressing over college that is' very hard to focus on reading for fun. But, I want to talk about a book I meant to write up my thoughts on months ago.

The Safekeep by Yael van der Wouden.

(this is REALLY LONG under the cut)

I actually won this in a GR giveaway that I entered on a whim, just because it came up when filtering to LGBTQ books lol. Was surprised to receive an ARC in the mail a week later! And dear god am I glad because it ended up being one of my favorite books I've read in ages. The book was released around a week ago and I really think it's worth checking out.

It is historical fiction, set in The Netherlands in the 1960s. I described it on BluSky as thus when I first started it: "lesbian psychological drama about siblings in post war Netherlands and some kind of toxic erotically charged mess between a hella neurotic woman and her would-be sister-in-law"BUT ITS SO MUCH MORE. Even before we get into the fact this is a novel that is really about the Holocaust. Yes, it IS an erotically charged mess between our hella neurotic PoV protagonist, Isabel, living alone in the house she'd grown up in yet does not own, and being forced to host her would-be sister-in-law Eva, who stands to own the house if she marries Isabel's playboy younger brother, who will gain possession as soon as he marries and settles down to start a family. Isabel is terrified of losing the only place she feels she can exist, to losing this one last connection to her mother, her place of safety where she is in control. Isabel is 30 years old, solitary, quiet, anxious, struggles to empathize with others or express herself; Eva is a wrecking-ball of energy, of airheaded youthful irreverence, trying so hard to ingratiate herself to Isabel, who has decided from the first meeting to hate her guts, and Eva isn't helping by pushing back against Isabel's controlling nature and boundaries over and over and over.

Of course that boundary-pushing while forced to live with one another leads to kissing leads to fucking, and Isabel, who is a 30 year old virgin terrified of the idea of kissing or having sex with a man she reluctantly allows to "court her since people /expect/ her to allow it, has an explosive sexual awakening and an awakened all-devouring hunger for this woman who represents so much of what she finds distasteful in life.

Honestly, the sex scenes in this book are some of the hottest I have read ever, at all, in traditionally-published lesbian or F/F fiction, wither literary or genre. They're incredibly visceral, straightforward and not shying away from the actual physicality of intimacy, of fucking, not dancing around naming the body and the ways these women touch and penetrate one another. It's such a breath of fresh air from writing that carefully refuses to say that a woman's fingers is going in another woman's cunt and getting her wet. The desperate possessiveness is palpable; the fact Isabel is such a repressed mess of a virgin but ends up becoming the partner who so often takes charge, pushes, claims, like she's been denied life-giving waters her whole life and now she's desperate to slake her thirst, is soooooooo wonderfully depicted. THIS is the adulthood loss of virginity I am here for.

But as I said before, this is also a book about the Holocaust, about the post-war years where Dutch Christian society was desperate to "move on" and ignore their complicity in the horrors suffered by the Jewish community of The Netherlands, of the betrayals and thefts that were never acknowledged, the lives that were never returned. To be honest, the summary of the book on the cover or GR didn't mention the Holocaust at all, I assume because it's a huge spoiler for the twist of the novel, but it is the moment of history that the entire story and the lives of these characters revolve around. And Eva! Dear fucking god, Eva is one of the most carefully, thoughtfully written characters struggling with long-term un-treated badly-coping trauma I have read in fucking years. Eva deserves everything good in the world.

I will also not spoil where the story leads to, but I did say this on Bluesky:

got to the third part of this novel and been completely sideswiped yet again in how painfully emotionally gutting harrowing this prose is exploring christian european antisemitism post-ww2 post-holocaust i really hope this novel wins the author a lot of awards for this debut novel its 3am and i cant type, i was just sitting on the floor of my bathroom unable to stop reading as soon as the format of the narrative changed and it just did not stop. i had to force myself to stop reading it. god. also i have to say Eva is one of the most well written characters exemplifying what could be CPTSD/BPD i've read in sooooooooo long. well written traumatized characters. i love her and want her to have even a smidge of happy ending by the end of this

A lot of this book is about taking what people give you on the surface, the masks they put up to keep others from looking too deeply, the masks they put up to keep from having to look into /themselves/ too deeply, and having them torn away from their face until they and all the ugly, ugly, terrified parts of themselves are laid bare and vulnerable. A lot of it is about those in positions of privilege, positions of societal power, being terrified of looking too deeply into the past and acknowledging where they and their families are complicit in the suffering of others and the destruction of lives. Isabel and Eva give each other so much, and then ruin one another so thoroughly, and then come back together over and over, and the ending is such a bittersweet one, a "are they really going to manage through all this?" end, but I loved it so much.

Anyway, TL;DR, yes I recommend this book a lot.

Also it has one of the best "coming out to your siblings" exchanges I've ever read.

Bonus for symbolic horny pear-eating metaphors haunting hella-repressed in-denial lesbians:

[snowbellewells]

Self Promo Sunday: “Now We Are a Fairy Tale”

So this week’s self-promo rerun comes from back in the same timeframe of the show’s canon as “Start of the Dance” a week ago did. I envisioned this little one shot happening not long after the season three finale episode ended, and I do feel like it could work as a missing moment we just didn’t get to see on camera. Here’s hoping you all might enjoy revisiting this time in the show once more with me this week!

Also available on AO3 or ff.net, if that’s your preference...

Summary:  It must be true; they're in the book now... Killian and Emma fluff post-"There's No Place Like Home"

by: @snowbellewells 

It didn't strike Emma Swan fully until much later that night. Not until after she had worried and fretted with her mother over what she had inadvertently done to Regina, held and cooed at, and quite honestly, cried over holding her new baby brother in her arms, and finally trudged up the steps to the loft behind the rest of her family. They were all weary - and certainly ready for a good night's sleep without having to worry about Wicked Witch attacks, lost memories, winged killer primates, or yawning time portals. In fact, everyone was so exhausted that even her incredibly doting, nosey, and old-fashioned parents had not yet raised any sort of argument at the fact that she was tugging her pirate captain along with her. Henry was practically asleep on his feet at the front of their little procession with Snow and the baby, for which Emma was glad; he surely would have noticed.

Killian, however, was making quiet protest any chance he could whisper near her ear without alerting the others. "Lass, you needn't take me in like a stray pup. My room at Granny's is quite sufficient. I cannot impose on your family, and surely your parents will object."

"I don't care, Killian. You're coming," she hissed back. She didn't particularly want to have her parents go all overprotective on her, but right at this moment, she couldn't have him out of her sight either. It was amazing how simply her heart had expanded to want and need him more with every beat. As cautious and guarded as she had been, now that she had admitted her feelings, she was lit up in the glow of his love, and she couldn’t let him go for a second.

"I'll be fine, Love," he insisted as they crossed the threshold and Emma turned to magically seal and safeguard the place behind them – more out of habit than from continued necessity – and the rest of their little troupe moved off further into the house. "This is not the way things are done. For all my jesting, I am a gentleman, Emma, and I wish to court you properly."

"Really, Killian?" she smirked, arching a brow at him, half in flattered disbelief and half in exasperation. Now that she wasn't fighting him anymore, she had honestly been looking forward to really getting her hands on him.

"Aye, truly, Darling," he replied softly. Both the hushed timbre of his voice and the look in his eyes conveyed his sincerity, even without Emma using her superpower. "I wish to do right by you, and I am not sure how far to trust my control if we are to be sleeping in the same quarters."

Emma had to swallow a rather large lump in her throat at the look of hunger in his eyes while he spoke those last words, his hypnotic blue gaze practically caressing her. "You and me both, Buddy," she remarked wryly, admitting in her head that he was probably right to slow this down a bit, though the whole thing seemed oddly reversed from their usual interactions.

"What's that, Swan?" he questioned, a smirk on his face showing he already had a good idea where her thoughts had been.

Looking up at him coyly from beneath her lashes, Emma smirked right back before explaining, "I was honestly looking forward to allowing you into my quarters, Pirate. Your charms have finally won me over."

"About bloody time!" was his immediate playful retort. His eyes flashed with true relief, even as he broke into a pleased chuckle accompanying the familiar response. Then, he was pulling her to him, the hunger flaring again in his expression when she came willingly, almost melting into his embrace. "If that's the way you feel, Princess…" he murmured gruffly before lowering his head and capturing her lips with his own.

It was as desperate and strong as it had been either of the times before. Though she had been warmly overwhelmed and almost boneless as Killian first wrapped her up, Emma was soon responding in kind, her hands clutching almost frantically at his shoulders before one trailed up even further to fist in his dark hair.

It would have been near painful, if Killian hadn't been so stirred by the show of need from her equal to his own. The little growl that escaped her throat, demanding more, spurred him on, and he delved his good hand into her soft, golden hair in return, angling her head just so to deepen the kiss further, a groan rumbling through his chest in spite of himself in response to the feel of Emma in his arms at last.

Tremors ran through Emma's body at Killian's reaction, still not sure how to believe someone could desire her so completely, honestly, and unequivocally. Without coherent thought, Emma realized that she was moving, drawing him along with her, heading toward the hall, to the stairs and her room. They would have made it too; she had no doubt, if there had not been the creak of a floorboard, and then footsteps on the stairs.

They pulled apart as a suspicious-looking Charming appeared above them on the stairway. His hand was still up, having been rubbing his eyes sleepily before he caught his daughter and his new friend in the midst of their first serious makeout session. The Prince's eyes narrowed and his voice, though grumpy and tired, did not brook argument as he came down the rest of the steps to stand before them, studying them both with astute authority.

"I'm grateful, Hook, not stupid," David grumbled, shuffling past them into the kitchen to the sink. "Let's keep it PG in here, shall we?"

Emma couldn't help the actual giggle that escaped her upon seeing Killian's look of confusion at her father's cautionary statement. The oddity of both her man not understanding what a movie was, nor of being caught making out by her father like he should have been able to do when she was a teenager, didn't escape her and she was beaming – truly happy with everything in her life and hardly knowing how to handle so much joy.

David turned with his glass of water and gave each of them a stern, searching look. "I'll see you both in the morning," was all he finally said before moving back toward his and Snow's room. Still, his implication was clear.

"Yes, your Highness," Killian responded, giving the Prince a nod as he passed, and somehow managing to convey both respect and sardonic humor at the same time. Emma could do little more than bite her lip to hold back further laughter at the both of them and the whole situation.

When Charming had gone and they were alone again, Emma couldn't help the fit of giggles she dissolved into, one quick look at Killian's curious expression and the eyebrow he raised in question at her had Emma burying her face in his shoulder, hers shaking with mirth.

"What is it, Love?" he asked, brushing reverent fingers through her hair and chuckling with her, more at simply seeing her happy than in understanding what she found so funny.

She shook her head, glancing back up at him happily. "Nothing much," she assured him with a grin. "One of these days we'll just have to inform you of some modern sayings, Pirate, that's all."

"So, Darling…" he murmured, blue eyes darkening attractively with intent as he leaned forward, all seriousness and innuendo once more, "where were we?"

Emma had to draw in a shaky breath to center herself and keep her body from betraying her by falling right back under his spell. She leaned away from his tempting lips and quirked a wry smile at him, clearly teasing. "I was about to make you forget that you're 'always a gentleman'," she supplied.

Killian's face registered shock for a moment, before he literally licked his lips and reached out to recapture her in his arms. "Too right, Lass," he agreed huskily.

Emma shook her head, this time evading his grasp playfully. "I think it's a good thing David interrupted us," she said hesitantly. "I was getting swept up in the moment, and I don't want to ruin this, the way I've done with nearly every other relationship in my life. Besides, they trust us, Killian…"

He gave her a doubtful look, but she pressed on.

"No, I mean it. They trust you too. And I think you value that more than you let on. Pirate reputation to uphold and all," she winked at him jokingly with that last statement.

"Emma, I would never…" he began, concern in his eyes, as if fearing that she thought he would take advantage.

She stepped forward again, bringing her hand to rest over his heart tenderly. "I know, Killian. Don't worry so much. I was the one who went a little overboard." She paused for a moment, searching his lovely eyes until she saw relief clear them. "Stay here for a second, okay?" she asked finally. "I'll be right back. There's something I want to show you."

She headed for the hallway and saw him moving in to sit on the living room couch, before she turned to tiptoe into Henry's room. Her eyes adjusted to the darkness easily with the aid of the moonlight spilling in through the window and across her son's peaceful, sleeping face. She knew what she was after and quietly crept right over to Henry's desk, where she knew her kept his prized book of fairy tales, front and center on the surface in a place of honor.

Smiling once she had it in her hands, Emma ran her fingertips thoughtfully over the curling, gilt letters on the book's cover. Without this book, Henry would never have known their story, he wouldn't have come looking for her, and her whole life now would be different. For all that she had sworn she wanted out of the crazy, magical Storybrooke world, Emma would no longer want to be in the normal world she'd had – all alone and closed off from love.

Still trying not to make a sound or disturb Henry's rest, Emma turned and slipped out of her son's room and back to the living room where her pirate waited.

When Killian raised his face to smile at her and patted the couch cushion beside him, she was drawn forward – right to his side like a magnet. Opening the large book over both of their laps, Emma could not help cuddling in and laying her head on his shoulder. Even just a few days prior, him wrapping his good arm around her to hold her closer and ruffle her hair would have frightened her, crowded her, felt too confining, but now she reveled in it, tipping her face up to press a kiss to the underside of his strong, defined jaw.

Killian sucked in a quick, strangled breath, and she felt him tense, bringing himself back under control. "You are sailing dangerous waters, Princess," he warned, tone carefully light, but his grip around her showing just how difficult that restraint was. With a sigh, he tried to move beyond what was simmering between them, loosening his taut muscles by sheer force of will. "Why don't you show me what you were intending to show me?" he suggested.

Emma nodded and began to rifle through the pages in the book, looking for the picture she had glimpsed only briefly with Henry earlier at Granny's. She hadn't purposefully been trying to torment Killian; the affection and greedy touching and hunger were completely new to her and nearly overwhelming. It was still surprising and difficult for her to fathom the affect she seemed to have on him without even trying. So many years of being invisible – not mattering to anyone – were not something that could be forgotten in a few days, or even months, and she could easily be stunned all over again by his devotion and care. Emma shook her head a little to clear it of so many circling thoughts, and finally landed on the story she had been seeking. Her hands ghosted over the picture still familiar from recent memory. Then, she turned to study Killian's face, making sure he understood what this meant.

She was no longer fighting it. They were real. They were True.

Killian's eyes widened adorably, leaning over the illustration slightly and then grinning as if his face might split in two. "Are we now in this book, Lass?" he asked, awe in his voice.

A lump that had risen in her throat stopped Emma's words, so she merely nodded her head, locking eyes with him and bringing her hand to cradle his stubbled cheek. She swallowed before finding her voice shakily, then finally managed, "We are. Or at least Charles and Leia are…" she chuckled at her own ridiculously bad attempt at thinking on her feet.

"Ah, well, those two certainly look quite happy, don't they?" he murmured, voice rumbling in her ear and sending shivers racing all along her skin.

Normally, she would be running by now – but instead, for the first time ever, she wanted to stay right there. "It almost looks like a happy ending," she agreed, blinking back the tears of joy that were still trying to threaten.

"So now we are a fairytale ourselves, are we Swan?"

"Looks that way," she responded cheekily.

"The Princess and the Pirate?" he questioned lightly, jokingly trying to guess the title.

"Hmm…" Emma hummed, pretending deep thought for a second, and then she smiled at him warmly, barely resisting the urge to curl up even closer against him. "Maybe you should read it to me, and we'll find out?"

Killian acquiesced easily to her wishes, and Emma could see clearly now that it was the same thing he had been doing for as long as she had known him; striving to do her bidding and waiting for her to understand. His rich, sultry, accented voice wrapped around her like a comforting blanket, retelling the adventure they had undertaken together. Her peace and contentment were so blissfully complete that she was almost afraid to close her eyes, though exhaustion was fast overcoming her as she listened to his voice.

Her eyelashes fluttered, and Emma tried valiantly to fight them back open. Killian's fingers brushed feather-light over her forehead just then, followed by a quick, gentle peck of his lips. Carefully, he eased her down to rest her head on his thigh and stretch her legs out across the couch.

"It's alright, Emma love. Rest. I will be here when you wake."

And with those words, she finally fell into the most peaceful sleep she'd ever had, followed shortly by her pirate – both knowing they were safe… and home at last.

Tagging a few who might enjoy: @jennjenn615 @kmomof4 @searchingwardrobes @teamhook @revanmeetra87 @whimsicallyenchantedrose @laschatzi @jrob64 @apiratewhopines @cosette141 @spartanguard @therooksshiningknight @tiganasummertree @optomisticgirl @scientificapricot @tomeandflickcorner @thislassishooked @winterbaby89 @hollyethecurious @stahlop @sotangledupinit @xarandomdreamx @gingerpolyglot @gingerchangeling @elizabeethan @the-darkdragonfly @donteattheappleshook @xsajx @wefoundloveunderthelight @justanother-unluckysoul @motherkatereloyshipper​ 

[babeczka415]

Eternal Love - Chapter 7

A/N: sorry if this chapter seems rough. If was actually really hard for me to write this knowing where I am taking this story. I hope you all enjoy it though

If you lose someone but find yourself, you won. Today marks a year… a year since he walked away from me.  I never imagined I would lose him but I had refound myself. I was so caught up with him and everything with Hannah that I had lost who I was.

Dan had stuck by my side through all of it. It has been six months since we started dating and everything was going great. I honestly think I can see a future for myself that wasn't a life on the run. However, I found myself missing Jake, especially when Hannah or Lilly talked about him. I was glad he kept in some form of contact with them but man it hurt. It hurt that he was willing to put their lives at risk but not mine. It hurt that he still talked to them and checked in but I was the one he pushed away.

Am I selfish for these feelings? Should I end things with Dan, the great guy is he? All because I find myself still missing Jake. 

I shake my head, no I can't let today get in my head. Dan has been perfect these last six months and my heart would break losing him from my life.

I realize the time and that I need to get the food ready for dinner with Dan tonight. I decided to make a fried steak with a potato salad and some sauteed garlic asparagus.

Dan's POV

It's been six months since her and I decided to be honest about our feelings. At first everything was great. I knew in her heart he still held a spot and I understood, she thought he was her forever love and her heart had been broken. During these six months he realized she's still been healing. There were lots of great moments between them but as he watched her in the kitchen cooking dinner he couldn't help but think they both deserved more. 

She would always hold a special place in his heart, no doubt he would always love her. However, were they really in love? Could they both imagine waking up to each other every morning and falling asleep in eachothers arms every night?

In his heart he knew his answer, he could, but she couldn't. He knew the moment  Gackerman came back her heart would instantly pull towards him without her even realizing. That's what I wanted, I wanted the love he knew that deep down inside both their hearts was still there for eachother.

There hasn't been a moment these six months that he knew would keep her in his arms when he returns. There was no doubt he would return for her.

I lean against the door frame, watching her cooking them dinner. Whoever ends up with her will be a lucky man, but he will always be a part of her life as he cares about her and would do anything to protect her that he could.

I walk up and stand next to her, "MC, can we talk?"

She looks up me with those hazel eyes and a big smile. "Yeah let me just finish dinner, it's just about done." She kisses me on the cheek as she tastes dinner and I can tell she's pleased as she pulls it off the burner. "Let's eat first though, I made your favorite meal."

I swear her smile could light up any room and I feel like I'm about to break her heart. I reluctantly agree to eating before we talk. I don't want her cooking tonight to go to waste. I feel she might kick me out of here and I can't blame her one bit if she does.

MC POV

I'm faking this tonight with Dan. After six months I shouldn't have torn I should feel those butterflies still when he looks at me. I doubt he can tell I'm even faking it. I've noticed these last couple months he's more like the brother I never had and I know we need to end this. However, I don't want this dinner to go to waste. So while he wants to talk I'm glad he agreed to after. 

We enjoy the dinner with a drink. We decided to keep tonight alcohol free which is a nice change.  As we finish eating and joking around I go to take his plate and he grabs my hand. I see in his eyes he wants to talk.

"Dan I need to tell you something," I look away from him.

"Same time then boo" he smiles.

"I think we should end this" we both say at the same time. 

It's almost like a weight is off our shoulders. As we both say the same thing."Dan, don't get me wrong you're a great guy but I feel we're better off as friends." I say with a sigh. 

"Boo, I feel the same towards you. I know today is a year and I know if he does return whether you want to admit if or not. Your heart will pull you right back to him." He puts his hand on my forearm.

I feel the tears because he's right. No matter how much I heal and move on, Jake will always have a part of my heart. Dan pulls me in for a hug and I just start balling. We both know the tears aren't for us, they are for the truth I have been hiding.

[scumbagsblog]

Life’s too short to wait for someone to ask me to answer these, I’m just gonna do it.

1. 64

2. No, but I plan on rereading The Locked Tomb books next year before Alecto comes out

3. Yellowface, She Who Became the Sun, Jade City, When the Angels Left the Old Country, and Man o’ War (in no particular order)

4. Sacha Lamb, R. F. Kuang, and TJ Klune

5. Fantasy, unless we also count “gay” as a genre

6. The Ruin of Kings. I’m a third of the way through it but I decided to try and speed through some books I’d wanted to finish this year instead of trying to finish it and probably not succeeding before the end of the year. #achievementculture

7. 3.7. Yes, I think it’s accurate. I think a lot of people consider 3 stars to be worse than I do. A book should really astound me to get 5 stars, and 4 is “very good but not perfect.” 3 is still a perfectly good book, if maybe a book not worth any awards.

8. Yep! My goal was 50 books, then 60, and I finished with 64. I also played a “spooky reading bingo” game with my friends and I got bingo for it. Also, this wasn’t strictly a goal, but between my new job translating books into Braille and joining an LGBT book club I’ve been reading a lot more culturally diverse novels than I otherwise would have known were out there.

9. Wouldn’t go so far as to call them NEW to me, but I read a lot more short story collections and memoirs this year than I usually do

10. Yellowface

11. The Year of the Flood

12. Camp Damascus and House of Leaves

13. House of Leaves, A Darker Shade of Magic, Like a Love Story, The Dangers of Smoking in Bed

14. Shiver by Junji Ito would be nice, but let’s see if I finish the book I’m working on before year’s end

15. Yellowface won the Goodreads Award and I think that was definitely deserved. Man o’ War was a Stonewall Honor Book — again, deserved. I also read a short story collection called Stories No One Hopes Are about Them which won the Iowa short fiction award. It was… fine.

16. Heartstopper… I’m sorry, it was undoubtedly cute and the art is very good but I honestly think once you peel away the hype it’s just a teenybopper love story like any other ._.

17. When the Angels Left the Old Country. I didn’t have any expectations going into it cuz I read it to translate it for work, but… wow. It was shocking how easily I fell into the story. Absolutely no notes.

18. Good question. Like… 10? I read a lot of books either from the library or at work for free.

19. Yes. Libby app my beloved.

20. I’m Glad My Mom Died. It was very good.

21. No lol go outside

22. According to Goodreads it was Tomie at 750 pages. But I feel like that’s cheating cuz it was a collection of like 22 graphic novels. So I’m gonna go with The Magus at 656 pages.

23. I’ve read books start to finish in one day, but they’re all graphic novels

24. Camp Damascus, mostly because the writing style didn’t speak to me at all and I have a long TBR to get to. Also The Epic of Gilgamesh.

25. No idea! Maybe 70 books? The world is my oyster!

end-of-year book ask

How many books did you read this year?

Did you reread anything? What?

What were your top five books of the year?

Did you discover any new authors that you love this year?

What genre did you read the most of?

Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?

What was your average Goodreads rating? Does it seem accurate?

Did you meet any of your reading goals? Which ones?

Did you get into any new genres?

What was your favorite new release of the year?

What was your favorite book that has been out for a while, but you just now read?

Any books that disappointed you?

What were your least favorite books of the year?

What books do you want to finish before the year is over?

Did you read any books that were nominated for or won awards this year (Booker, Women’s Prize, National Book Award, Pulitzer, Hugo, etc.)? What did you think of them?

What is the most over-hyped book you read this year?

Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

How many books did you buy?

Did you use your library?

What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations?

Did you participate in or watch any booklr, booktube, or book twitter drama?

What’s the longest book you read?

What’s the fastest time it took you to read a book?

Did you DNF anything? Why?

What reading goals do you have for next year?

[malamai]

The last week of school has been a absolute blast!

I think I've probably had more fun than the kids. 😂

We had Aura and Elijah's sports days, Lee made Aura's but couldn't make Elijah's due to working, I somehow managed to do a 39 hour week and make it to everything they did, the sports days, the shows, I am going to Elijah's prize giving today, but I think the sports days I enjoyed the most, I ran the mam's race as always but this year I honestly don't know what has happened in my tiny brain but I have been getting so competitive when it comes to that mam's race. 😂 I ran Auras and its like I had flashbacks of when I used to run cross country at my first high school and was on the team and something in my brain just went "YES I LOVE THIS!" I came 4th in Aura's even though I was absolutely exhausted from work and then I had 2 days to sort myself out for Elijah's, I was raring to go!

So I have been flat out, I did a 39 hour work week this week, the week before that I had done a 48 hour work week, I have been running around organising for school trips, taking care of the house, the dogs, helping Elijah with his induction days and basically you know, I was fatigued, exhausted and ready to flop. His sports day arrived and I was like in my head "THIS IS MY TIME, IM GONNA WIN THIS RACE FOR THIS KID!" Completely just in the zone, two other mams were stood either side of me that I am quite friendly with, one of them is like "we have got this" then the other on the opposite side is saying to me "oh god it's really slippy, I hope I don't fall! 😂" and I'm telling her to stop being daft and she's not gonna fall because I am super supportive like that! 😂 the whistle blows and we all set off like bats out of hell, the lass that was talking about falling, falls instantly after 5 steps, but I didn't even noticed because I was just so focused, I'm running and running and I'm nearing the finish line, I'm in the lead and suddenly I'm like "omfg I am actually gonna win!" Then I get this weird feeling in my leg and my hips, I'm already aching and exhausted and suddenly my leg just went and I HIT THE FUCKING DECK! 😂😂😂 I SLID RIGHT ALONG THE GRASS! I was dying with laughter, it was so funny! If I had not fallen literally an inch away from the finish I would have won! 😂😂😂

The mam who fell came up to me and she's like "omfg I thought you were gonna win! I can't believe we fell over!" I said to her "that's your fault! You jinxed yourself and then took me down with you! I'm racing again with you next year when it's our daughters sportsday ypu are banned from saying the F word and its not the one youd think would be banned at a kids event! 😂 The other mam I was running with was like "what even happened!? You were there and then I looked around and suddenly your weren't!" 😂 the head teacher even came up to me laughing her back off and said "you know Misty, I was just saying the crowd needed to be making more noise! You certainly made them!" Then I got back to my friend and my parents who had also come to Elijah's sports day and they'd videod it! Even better!

Best sports day I've ever had hands down, I had an absolute blast! It's as my best friend said if anyone was going to go down, she's glad it was me because I don't have that thing where I get embarrassed, I just laugh at everything and its just such a me thing to do! 🤣😂😂