#honestly don’t know what occupation she’d have in a modern setting

[into-the-feniverse]

A biomed student, a graphic design student, and a theology student walk into a bar…

The drawing without a background + the sketch because I’m not suuuuper jazzed about how it looks with one but it looked too empty without it

Disclaimer: the background is from Pexels

Also, I tried asking ChatGPT to finish the joke for me:

[wallwriterstuff]

Chalk Lines || Alec Volturi x Reader ||

Summary: Alec has met his mate, but he isn’t quite sure he wants one. With a few revelations from Marcus and the discovery of a hidden talent, Alec finds that having a mate isn’t actually all that bad. 

Warnings: Implied homelessness, a brief mention of your standard Volturi violence 

Words: 3427 

The witch twins had quite the reputation and none of the adjectives used to describe them were necessarily pretty.

Deadly.

Cruel.

Sadistic.

Terrifying.

It was a useful reputation given their occupation, but it wasn’t necessarily a true reflection of either twin’s character. Though she may have been hot-headed and quick to torture her adversaries, Jane became far less terrifying when one knew about her penchant for collecting coins; she’d sworn both Demetri and Felix to secrecy when the pair had stumbled across the tiered briefcases in her room, specially designed to hold centuries worth of different coins in varying types and shapes. Alec on the other hand was considered less likely to explode with rage but seen as the quiet and calculating type, yet if anyone saw him squirreled away in Volterra’s library, nose glued to the pages of a book as it so often was, the jagged edges of his cold silence suddenly became a lot softer and he looked far less threatening.

Sadly, people rarely looked beyond the surface in this modern world. It was for that very reason that Alec had not seen his mate in the two weeks since you’d been brought to Volterra. It had been pure coincidence that as they tracked the abnormally large nomadic coven, they’d stumbled right through the alleyway the young human was huddled in. Alec had been locked in place the moment he set eyes on you, your tear stained cheeks turning his muscles rigid until the others had been forced to stop with him. You were about the same age as he had been when he was turned he thought, which only made it all the stranger that the young human would be alone in a filthy alleyway so late at night. He couldn’t just leave you, not when he could smell the oncoming storm and all you had was a flimsy looking jacket and a leather-bound book to your name. Of course, they also couldn’t have just left the hunt, not when those nomads had drawn too much attention already.

The human hadn’t particularly appreciated being forcibly removed from their alleyway to witness the execution of five vampires, or maybe it was the fact said vampires tried to kill you as Alec and the others flitted about tearing them limb from limb? Either way the violent spectacle had not been the best introduction to the supernatural world, and the fear in your eyes whenever you saw Alec, Demetri, Felix or Jane ever since that moment was something that irked Alec more than he let on. He didn’t even necessarily want a mate, so the instinctual upset he felt at your obvious distress had only made his irritation worse the longer the situation dragged on for. Caius was getting impatient to, insisting the little human be turned and the threat to their secrecy you represented eliminated. Aro was of a different opinion, wanting you to have some time to adjust to your new life in Italy and to start feeling comfortable amongst the Coven members, lest you be thrown into a heightened state of anxiety and terror when you were turned.

Alec hadn’t even seen the damn human he had being trying to avoid and track down in equal measure. If Caius’s ranting hadn’t been enough to drive him mad Jane had been giving him an earful about making himself miserable by ignoring you. He knew he was being a little petulant, but the truth was he was forever frozen at 13 (maybe 14, he wasn’t too sure since the date wasn’t kept as religiously in the medieval era and his human memory was blotchy at best) and didn’t want to be eternally bound to a lover. It was in the library, his eyes rereading the same page he’d been stuck on for the last twenty minutes, that Marcus found him. He greeted his master with a gentle inclination of his head, mildly surprised when the older man glided to the opposite end of the sofa he sat on and sank down into the leather.

“Haven’t you read that one before?” Marcus asked. His voice was no more than a breath of air, a sigh carried on a gentle breeze. He was not known for being loud or brash. Alec glanced at him, not surprised to find his master staring straight ahead with the same mournful expression he always held. Well, it was Didyme’s portrait that hung above the fireplace after all, she had loved reading to.

“I have read everything in here at least five times over.” Alec pointed out, bringing the ghost of a smile to Marcus’s lips. It wasn’t necessarily unusual for Marcus to join him in the library, though it was far more common for their evenings to spent in silence since he wasn’t the best conversationalist. That was okay though, since Alec wasn’t particular keen on conversation either, preferring the quiet and the calm it brought. The last moments of his life were spent full of screaming and shouting and he found himself rather adverse to loud noise now.

“I wonder, has your mate seen this library?” he mused. Alec frowned slightly, the familiar irritation bubbling within him at the mention of his mate. Maybe he didn’t want to share something with someone who clearly wasn’t keen on sharing even a sliver of their time with him, had no one though of that?

“I would not know.” He replied, though he couldn’t quite keep his voice even. Marcus hummed slightly under his breath, his eyes never once leaving the painting across from him. Alec felt the usual sympathy that bubbled within him when Marcus looked like this, when it was clear his coven and his duty were all he had left but all he wanted was to be ash on the wind, finally free. Marcus called his name softly, forcing Alec to turn his attention from his book (that he was no further through than he had been when he started reading almost two hours ago) and look back at the ancient one.

“I do not think they want a mate either.” He said, surprising him. Alec thought he had hidden it rather well, but he should have known that Marcus would see. He read relationships, he saw the bonds that formed between people and no doubt had acknowledge how weak the one Alec shared with his so called mate must have been. Hell, he was surprised it hadn’t withered and died yet.

“They…don’t?” he questioned. Marcus shook his head.

“Relationships look different, for everyone. Romantic threads tend to be a different colour, yours…yours resembles something more akin to friendship.” He informed him. Alec’s brows tugged down into a frown.

“Mates don’t have to be romantically involved?” he questioned. Marcus chuckled.

“No, platonic relationships between mates are more common than you think. Perhaps there ought to be another name for these kinds of mates, but I believe, what yours would like more than anything else, is a friend.” His voice was calming to the turbulent thoughts in his head, and Alec found himself nodding along as if part of him had known that all along. The problem was, Alec wasn’t exactly sure how to go about making friends either. He didn’t have all that many, and he supposed that you didn’t have all that many either given the state he’d found you in. Looking back on it, he couldn’t honestly say he found that he was as curious as a mate should be. The mates he knew were all romantically involved and completely devoted to everything about their other half, yet he’d never really felt that intense sort of pull towards them. There was a pull there for sure but…it wasn’t strong.

“I’m not sure how to be a good friend.” He admitted quietly, setting his book aside.

“Sometimes souls are joined together not because they are the missing other half, but simply because the halves that already exist compliment each other so well.” Marcus said, his eyes turning back towards Didyme’s portrait. Alec followed his gaze briefly, finding himself a lot calmer somehow when he thought of his mate as something other than a life partner. Now he wasn’t caught up in the worry of expectations, he felt guilt start to creep in. His mate had been left alone in an unfamiliar castle after a terrifying experience, and he had done little to soothe them since their arrival. He sighed quietly, pushed to his feet, and bid his master a quiet farewell before heading to Demetri’s room. What was he even supposed to do when he found you? What was he supposed to say? What could make up for a fortnight of ignorance on his part?

“Alec, are you planning on knocking or will you continue to dwindle away the evening hours by standing like an idiot at my door?” Demetri wondered, opening it just enough to lean his shoulder against the wooden frame. His face was smug, like he knew already what he was here for. Alec didn’t give him the satisfaction.

“Do not waste my time and less of it shall dwindle away, then.” He retorted, face unchanging. Demetri cocked his head, his smirk widening slightly as the silence settled between them. For those who knew Demetri well, it was easy to tell when he was using his gift. It was practically instinctual for him at this point but Alec saw the brief lapse of his attention, his eyes shifting from sharp and keen to vacant as he reached for your tenor, not seeing the hallway anymore but a variety of what he had described as colourful cords once.

“Same place they’ve been the past few weeks.” He said finally, his smile falling slightly, “One floor up right at the end of the corridor above us.” Alec frowned slightly. That corridor was abandoned, what was his mate doing there? With a slight nod of appreciation to Demetri, Alec turned on his heel and moved swiftly down the corridor towards the stairs leading upward. A lot of the upper floor had been destroyed in Marcus’s rage after he had lost Didyme. He had torn through most of the castle in his rage, rumour had it, but some of it had simply never been restored. Alec slowed his pace, eyes cutting through the gloom. The ripped tapestries and the leaves and dust that had blown in from broken windows left the whole place feeling rather eerie. He wondered briefly how his fragile mate could stand to be in such a place. Didn’t humans prefer lighter, warmer places? Then again, you had been left in an alleyway for some bizarre reason and Alec had know idea how long you’d been there.

A faint glow came from the room at the end of the corridor, the soft yellow light of a lamp he realised, as he moved closer. He could hear a gentle humming to, the melody building to the lyrics of a song he didn’t recognise drifting through the quiet toward him. He paused in the doorway, taking a moment to stare in awe. Unbeknownst to them, you had turned this abandoned room into your own personal haven, away from the vampires and the rest of the world. The floors were swept clean, the ivy that was creeping through a few other windows stripped away and cut back. The tapestries were removed from the walls and artfully ripped to create overlapping, mismatched pieces for an abstract, faded carpet in one corner. The shelves had been cleaned and polished, Alec recognising some of the books as those that had been provided in your room by them, but there was also a myriad of art supplies he knew hadn’t been. Currently, some of the tapestry was being used to soften the stone beneath your knees as you continued to add to a small, colourful piece in the corner of the curved wall.

It took him a moment to realise you were holding chalks, blending the light and dark to make varying shades for grass. One half of the large expanse of wall opposite the window was dark, in shades of grey and black and white. The one thing that did stand out was vibrant red of a figures eyes, and as Alec looked closer he realised that the blended figures were cloaked, depicting exactly what his mate had seen the night they met. The other half was still taking shape but was clearly supposed to be a brighter image.

“You have incredible talent.” He complimented. You jumped at the sound of his voice, heart jolting and speeding up in your chest as you dropped the chalk. With wide eyes, you stared back at Alec before scrambling to your feet, wiping chalky hands on the cloth protruding from the pocket of your jeans. Swallowing nervously, you glance back at your artwork before dropping your eyes to the floor, scuffing the toe of your shoe against the tapestry carpet. Alec thought you looked quite small like that, like you were embarrassed almost or expecting him to berate you, to laugh, or worse.  

“Thanks.” You mumbled. Alec hadn’t heard your voice sound like this before, the soft tones soothing and mellow, much different to the harsh sounds of screaming the night you’d met.

“May I come in?” he asked. He felt like he was intruding. You had set up plenty of lamps about and cushions on the carpet to make a small seating area, this was their space, not his. Slowly, his mate nodded, and Alec looked back at the chalk art on the wall once more.

“I…can rub it away.” You said, sounding uncertain. Alec immediately shook his head.

“Please don’t. I meant what I said, you have talent.” He lifted his hand without thinking, placing his index finger on a section of white and rubbing softly. Running his thumb over his finger, he marvelled at the slippery feel of the chalk dust between his fingers. “All of this is chalk?” he asked, the surprise in his voice obvious. He had never used chalk before as a medium. You nodded your head, pointing to the bucket of chalks at your feet, they were small and worked to stubs in some cases, but you clearly had made do.

“Did you never draw on the pavement with chalk as a kid?” you asked him. Alec’s lips twitched upward, a hint of mischief glinting in his eyes.

“When I was child, we barely had roads.” He answered. He heard your heartbeat falter a little in your chest, the shock registering on your face. Now he took the time to look you over, he realised you looked quite calm here in your little space. You clearly felt at ease here, your (Y/E/C) eyes soft and open for him to read. Despite that, you were clearly still a little wary of him to, unsure of what to say, what his intentions were in coming here. “How long have you been drawing?” he asked, hating the way the silence grew so easily between you both. You shrugged a shoulder, moving towards your little cushion area and settling yourself cross-legged on the floor, looking up at him curiously. Alec folded his arms, remaining standing. Truthfully, he’d be no more comfortable on the floor than he would be standing, but he also didn’t want to invade your space when you were quite obviously sizing him up.

It was odd to feel like he was intruding in his own home.

“A while, my Mom taught me.” You answered. It was no more and no less than he had asked for. Alec nodded along, uncertain what to say next. How did people make friends? Drawing your knees up to your chest, you dropped your chin on top of your legs, looking up at him. Come to think of it, you hadn’t taken your eyes off of him yet. Alec let his eyes wander once more, taking in the books and supplies scattered about.

“You need some new chalk.” He noted. Maybe he could do something about your passion to try and gain your trust a bit?

“I can make do.” You answered immediately. Alec frowned.

“You’ve barely any left.” He retorted stubbornly. You shrugged at him again, like you didn’t really care much either way. “Well, we can go out tomorrow and get more maybe…or some new books for your shelf, if you like.” He offered. You tilted your head, regarding him like you were watching an interesting experiment through a microscope.

“You don’t have to.” You murmured, looking mildly bewildered by him. Alec got the impression not many people offered to do nice things for you.

“You’ve yet to see the city. I think that should change.” He said, and with a time to pick you up at your room tomorrow he left you be. He wasn’t even half-way down the corridor when he heard the scraping of chalk on the stone once more. Alec wasn’t honestly prepared for just how much time it took. He had thought you had been quite calm and comfortable with him that night he first went to you, but it was weeks before you held a fluent conversation with him, letting him freely know your thoughts without being prompted by questions, some of which you wouldn’t answer. You were clearly not used to trusting others, but over the weeks Alec spent learning to draw from you, reading with you, helping you further decorate your nook of the castle, he couldn’t deny you had developed a strong friendship. He felt complete, calm, happy even. Marcus had been right. Fate had drawn the two of you together not because you were meant to be his missing piece, but rather you were meant to smooth over the cracks and heal one another so that when the person who was meant to fill the gap came along, they got something a little less broken than before.

“Alec? I don’t think I ever said thank you, did I?” you asked, four centuries later while overlooking the Parisian skyline. You were on a mission to eradicate an idiotic nomad with a terrible habit of torturing humans, something Felix was very upset he was missing out on. Alec looked at you with a raised eyebrow.

“Thank you for what?” he questioned. You grinned at him.

“For choosing this little sewer rat to be your best friend.” You poked and prodded his side as you spoke, making him squirm slightly as he tried to bat your hands away. His serious expression faltered, melting into a carefree smile before he laughed and snatched you up, threatening to drop you over the edge. It would have been a lot less terrifying if you weren’t on one of the highest beams the Eiffel Tower had to offer.

“You want to keep trying your luck? Well? Do you?” he demanded, grinning wildly as you squealed, fingers curled tight into his arms. Alec reeled you back in, settling you on the beam beside him so you could go back to swinging your legs back and forth. For a moment the sound of your laughter fading into the night was allowed to settle, drifting away on the breeze as the silence grew between you. It was then Alec spoke. “You don’t have to thank me. I think I did it as much for me as I did for you.” He confessed. He could feel your eyes burning holes in the side of his face and risked a glance sideways, seeing your understanding expression. You knew all of his past, the same way he knew yours. You had both healed each other from a considerable amount of trauma.

“Well then…here’s to us.” You declared, standing to grip the metal beam behind you and you leaned out, chin up high and free hand on your hip in a ridiculous, ostentatious pose. You looked oddly like you were trying to model for a statue pose. Alec snorted.

“I am not doing that.” He said.

“What? No! Come on! You can’t leave me hanging like this!” you protested. Alec stood, shaking his head and starting to climb down.

“Watch me.”

“No!”

“Goodbye, Y/N.”

“Best friends don’t let each other do stupid things alone!”

“You are never alone, I just prefer to watch your stupidity from the side-lines so I can be as affiliated with it as little as possible.”

“I’ll race you then!”

“Y/N don’t you dare jump off of the top of the Eiffel tower! Even we’re not that indestructible.”

“You ruin all my fun.”

[cruelangelstheses]

the whirlwind girl

fandom: six of crows rating: T characters: inej, nina words: 2.1k additional tags: modern au with magic, first meetings, sexual harassment, could be read as platonic or romantic description: when a drunk man hits on inej at a bar, a stranger comes to her rescue. a/n: HIIII i wrote this for the @sixofcrowszine which has now been shipped so i can post!!! i don’t have much to say except that this book absolutely enraptured me and i love nina and inej and their interactions with each other so !! girls <3 inspired by that prompt that’s like “you were being hit on at a bar so i pretended to be your partner to get them to go away”

read it on ao3

—

Inej isn’t sure why she’s even here.

She’s never been a fan of clubs or bars or similar establishments, especially not at night—too loud, bursting full with people whose inhibitions are hindered by alcohol. Besides, she’s just finished performing, and while the roar of a crowd cheering for her is much different from a bunch of random drunks, it still counts as being around people, and it drains her just the same. She prefers to spend her evenings curled up with a book or hanging out with a couple of close friends, not out late partying.

The whole reason she even came into the Crow Club in the first place is because she knows someone who works here, a funny and good-natured—if reckless—young man named Jesper, who spends about the same amount of time gambling during his off-hours as he does bartending during his shifts. Unfortunately for Inej, it turns out that Jesper, for once in his life, actually isn’t here tonight, even though he’s always here on Saturday nights. According to the current bartender, a slightly older man that Inej doesn’t recognize, he’s on a date, of all things, with a boy named Wylan. Perhaps she’ll text him about it later and ask how it went.

She’s happy for him, of course, but this also means that she has no business being at the Crow Club, so now she’s sitting awkwardly at the bar with a virgin pina colada in hand. She rarely drinks alcohol; she always needs to feel sharp, like the edge of a fresh blade. She knows she could just pay and leave, but it feels weird; she just got here. Maybe she’ll sit and people-watch for another ten or fifteen minutes, then slip out.

As this thought crosses her mind, Inej watches as a stocky, sweaty-looking man, already clearly inebriated, enters the casino...and immediately plops down onto the empty barstool beside her.

Inej takes a sip of her drink and stares down into the glass, pretending to be incredibly interested in its contents, but it does nothing to stop the man from leaning over and saying, “Saw your performance.” His breath smells of cheap whiskey, and Inej has to stop herself from wrinkling her nose.

“Did you, now?” she says without looking at him. Inej works the same job she’s always worked: she performs with her parents as a small troupe of traveling acrobats. Despite their occupation being somewhat unconventional in this day and age—circuses and such just don’t get as much traction as they used to—they manage fairly well. Besides, Inej lives for the thrill of the high wire.

“I did,” the man replies. Out of the corner of her eye, she can see him grinning like a wild dog. “Impressive, if I do say so myself.”

“Thank you.” Inej drums her fingernails nervously against the glass and takes another sip. She can feel her butterfly knife up against her hip, but using it might get her kicked out of the Crow Club—which wouldn’t be a huge loss, really, except that she’d hardly ever get to see Jesper. She already doesn’t see him very often since she travels so much. Or maybe pulling a knife on a guy wouldn’t make a difference here; it’s far from the nicest place in Ketterdam, and Ketterdam is far from the nicest city in Kerch.

Unexpectedly, the man slings an arm around Inej’s shoulders. “What do you say to showing me a few more tricks, hmm?”

This is why Inej doesn’t like bars.

“Um.” She clears her throat, squirming slightly. “No, thank you. Uh, my parents wouldn’t be pleased.”

The man licks his lips. His eyes gleam with bad intentions. “Who says your parents have to know, huh?”

Before Inej can say or do anything else, a brown-haired whirlwind of a girl she’s never seen before marches up to them and says in Kerch, “Hey! Hands off my girlfriend!”

Inej can feel her face heating up. Either this girl has the wrong person, or she knows exactly what she’s doing.

The man narrows his eyes in confusion and reluctantly pulls his arm away from Inej. The girl, pale and curvaceous with bright green eyes, puts her hands on her hips and shakes her head in disbelief. “Honestly. I leave for five minutes to go to the bathroom and come back to find that someone thinks he can just put his hands all over her. I mean, have some damn respect!” At that, she points an accusatory finger at the man.

Alright. It’s definitely the latter.

“I, uh, didn’t realize she was taken,” he says as he looks the girl up and down. “But hey,” he adds with a sly grin, “the more the merrier, right?”

The girl groans. “Classic,” she mutters under her breath. Putting a hand on the man’s upper arm, she leans in and says, quiet but firm, “We’re not interested.”

The man’s eyelids start to droop. Then, a second later, he passes out face-first onto the counter. A few people turn to look in their direction, and the girl feigns concern, gesturing helplessly to the man. “I think he had too much to drink,” she says, which is probably true, to be fair. One of the bouncers sighs and wanders over to grab him.

Inej watches them in silence. It’s not until the bouncer and the unconscious man are completely out of earshot that she turns to the girl that rescued her and says, not unkindly, “You’re a Heartrender.”

The girl hops up onto the barstool previously inhabited by the drunk man. “That I am,” she says quietly, so as not to be heard by the wrong set of ears. Suddenly she’s speaking in perfect Suli instead of Kerch, perhaps to make Inej more comfortable. “But more importantly, I’m the girl who just saved your ass.” She shrugs. “I thought maybe I could get him to leave you alone without having to use my power, but then he got creepier, so I just kind of said ‘fuck it’ and lowered his heart rate enough to make him pass out.”

Inej laughs a little at that. “I bet that’s useful,” she replies.

“Oh, yeah,” the girl agrees, “but I’m also persecuted for it, so...you win some, you lose some, I guess.” She says it casually, but Inej can hear the bitterness behind it.

Inej isn’t a Grisha, but she is Suli, and she knows well the feeling of persecution. “I understand,” she says softly. “And...thank you.” She could’ve handled it—at least, that’s what she tells herself—but she appreciates the gesture, more than she can properly express.

“It’s nothing,” the girl replies, but the faint pink in her cheeks tells a different story. “I have a lot of experience dealing with men like that. I figured I might as well help you out.” She holds her hands up defensively. “Not that I don’t think you could’ve handled it yourself, but…”

Inej shakes her head in understanding. “No, I get it,” she says. “I’m good with a knife, but I didn’t want to use it unless I felt like I had to.”

The girl’s eyes gleam with interest at that. “Nice. Oh!” she says, looking as though she just remembered something important. “I just realized I never even introduced myself. I’m Nina. You’re Inej, right? Inej Ghafa? I know you from your performances. I’ve seen some videos of you and your family online.”

“Really?” Inej says. For some reason, it still surprises her whenever people tell her that they know her from the internet. She didn’t think her family was that popular.

“Of course,” Nina replies. “You guys are really phenomenal.”

Before Inej can come up with an appropriate response to the compliment, she feels her phone buzzing in her pocket. Pulling it out, she chuckles at the name displayed: Mama. “Speaking of my family,” she says to Nina. “Let’s see if I can even hear her over all this Saints-forsaken noise.”

Nina crosses her fingers in support as Inej answers the phone and puts it up to her ear. “Hello?”

On the other end, she can just faintly hear her mother asking her where she is.

“I’m at the Crow Club, Mama,” she says. “I was looking for Jesper, but he’s not here, so I’m coming back to the room now.”

Seemingly satisfied with that response, her mother wishes her safety on the walk back to the hotel and hangs up.

“Sorry,” she says to Nina, slipping her phone back into her pocket. “I should probably be going. I was planning on leaving soon anyway when that guy came over.”

“That’s okay,” Nina says, hopping off the barstool. “I was thinking of heading out soon, too.”

Inej sets some kruge down on the counter for the bartender, then follows Nina out the door and into the cool night air.

“Hey,” Nina says as they stand outside the club, watching cars go by. “Would you want to—I don’t know—keep in touch?” She blushes as she says it, which doesn’t seem standard for her. “I know we didn’t talk for long, but I’m not from Kerch, so I don’t have many friends here, and you seem like a really cool person. I know you travel a lot, but…” She trails off and shrugs.

There’s still that part of Inej that warns her to exercise caution, that just because Nina helped her once doesn’t mean she’s “safe” yet. Deep down, though, Inej can feel the goodness in her. She saw a stranger in trouble and immediately leapt to her defense, even though it could’ve ended badly, even though she could’ve exposed herself as a Grisha in a potentially hostile environment. The least Inej can do is allow herself to trust her, just a little, just enough.

“That would be nice,” Inej says, pulling her phone back out. “I can give you my phone number, and you can give me yours.”

Nina’s face lights up, and Inej knows that this is the right decision. “Great!”

They exchange phones and plug their names and numbers into each other’s contact lists. When Inej gets her phone back, she sees that Nina’s surname is Zenik. It flows nicely, like a stream unobstructed by rocks or logs: Nina Zenik. Nina Zenik.

“Hmm.” Nina taps her chin thoughtfully. “I was going to offer to walk you back to wherever you’re staying, but I don’t want you to feel like I’m mothering you or think you can’t handle yourself. But it’s also a late night in Ketterdam, and that’s dangerous for anyone, let alone a young woman walking by herself. Me as well as you.”

Inej would be lying if she said she didn’t feel at least a twinge of anxiety walking the streets of Ketterdam alone at night. Staring down at the new number in her contacts, an idea presents itself to her.

“We could talk on the phone as we walk back to our places,” she says. “That way you can make sure that I’m safe, and I can make sure that you’re safe. Then, if something were to happen to one of us, the other one would know.”

A flash of what looks like relief crosses Nina’s face before she quickly covers it up. “Good idea.”

Nina’s apartment is, of course, in the opposite direction of Inej’s hotel, so they go their separate ways until they’re out of each others’ earshot, and then Inej calls Nina.

“Wow, I haven’t heard from you in forever,” Nina says.

Inej laughs. “I know. Such an agonizingly long thirty seconds.”

It takes Inej about fifteen minutes to walk to the hotel, during which she learns that the reason Nina is in Ketterdam is because she’s studying abroad for a semester, and that she’s currently attending Os Alta University to be a translator. She tells Inej funny college stories, and Inej tells her crazy stories about her travels in return. Strangely enough, Nina’s voice actually grounds her rather than distracts her. It keeps her mind in the moment so that she never has a chance to get lost in her own head. She doesn’t usually let her mind drift when she’s out and about in a large city, but with Nina, the odds are even lower. It’s comforting. Her voice is a guiding light.

Nina arrives at her apartment first, but she stays on the line with Inej, who reaches the hotel about five minutes later. Standing outside the front doors, Inej promises to keep in touch with the whirlwind girl who bounced into her life so suddenly less than an hour ago. When they finally hang up, her chest feels light.

[jackie-think-about-it]

Covered in the Colors

this started out as an excuse for me to write about colors but then it spiraled out of control as usual. my first newsies fic!!!

Modern AU Javid!

DISCLAIMER: I have no idea how crushes or romance work so if I’m laying it on too thick, that’s why

Jack Kelly was a creature of habit. As much as he loved spontaneity and thrived in it, there were some things he just had to do. Painting sessions with Medda, his adopted mother, was one of them. Every Tuesday, he would pick her up and they would drive to the studio where he worked (Of course, the habit started because of the staff discount!), where the following hours would be filled with ‘happy little trees’ and varying degrees of finished artwork. Don’t tell anyone, but Jack always hung around extra to study the canvases and mentally hand out corrections here and there. It was yet another habit. Being an art teacher had its effects, after all.

This session in particular shouldn’t have been any different. He may have bribed the girl leading the session (Smalls, his brain helpfully supplied) with a month’s supply of her favorite candies to do a desert/sunset painting, so he was looking forward to getting his hands on it. He opened the door for Medda, offering a hand gallantly, laughing when she took it and daintily stepped out of the beat-up truck like it was Cinderella’s carriage.

“I didn’t know I’d raised such a gentleman!” She grinned as they walked into the classroom, where Smalls was setting up easels, brushes, and cups of paint water. There were about 20 minutes until the session officially started, but Jack made an effort to come early every week to organize the paints and help register the attendees. He busied himself with the palettes, retorting “Nah, Mama, I’m an eldritch being of chaos trapped in a human body and you know it!” like it was second nature. It was.

He balanced the stack precariously in his arms, which in hindsight was a catastrophe waiting to happen. The leaning tower of palettes decided to come crumbling down while he was near the door; just his luck.  The resounding clatter drew Smalls and Medda’s attention, and Jack huffed in annoyance, crouching down to pick them back up. Before he nabbed all of them, another pair of hands appeared in his peripheral.

“Here, let me help you with that.” The most attractive man Jack had ever seen was also on the floor, handing him the palettes that managed to escape his grasp. He was lanky, with dark brown, wavy hair, bright, hazel eyes, strong, hooked nose, and a gorgeous, easy smile. Jack mumbled his thanks, hurriedly distributing them and side-eyeing the brunet (who had gone to register with Smalls) with a smile. Time flew after that, and before long, everyone else had come and the session began.

The powers that be must have found favor with Jack today, because the pretty stranger chose a station right across from his. They went around the room, introducing themselves, but most of their names and occupations escaped his attention. When it was his newfound muse’s turn, he smiled shyly, and wow. Jack decided there wasn’t much he wouldn’t do to bring that smile onto his handsome face.

“Hey, um, my name’s David, and I’m a gra- um, grad student,” he said with a voice that probably made angels jealous. David, huh? Pretty name for a pretty guy. Jack shelved the information mentally, before screeching to a halt. What kind of bullshit was this? He wasn’t one to fall for people out of nowhere. Why would this evening and this guy be any different? How did he know he wasn’t straight or something? As the instructions began, he lost himself to the familiar rhythm of brushstrokes and beautiful scenery, only glancing over every so often at David. Jack could easily excuse that as checking the reference picture, since from his perspective, it was just behind him.

It only half surprised Jack that when he looked down, a face was taking shape in the red tones of his landscape. He really was whipped, wasn’t he? Medda nudged his elbow, and when he turned, she gave him a sly wink. Immediately, his face turned red, and he put his face in his hands. “Mama!” He hissed quietly, before jerking his hands back like he’d been burned. Too late, he realized that his fingers were covered in paint, so that meant… Great. Good going, Kelly. He wiped off what he could, taking out his phone to check his reflection. Pink, purple, and orange were smeared on his cheeks, as well as a smattering of red on his nose. How did that even get there?

Jack scrubbed at his face with some water and a paper towel, successfully removing the worst of the acrylic mess. Then, he looked around to make sure nobody else (well, Medda didn’t count, but she’d seen things much more embarrassing than that) saw what happened. That’s when his eyes landed on David yet again. His eyes were narrowed in concentration, and his lips were pursed in a thin line. Jack couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to kiss them- Nope, moving on. David’s hands were like another canvas altogether, stained with sunlight and mesas and sky. They were totally worth waxing poetic over! Long, musicians’ fingers (probably; Jack could tell because he used to dabble in piano), with streaks of paint down the sides from quick fixes and broad palms dappled with white like stars.

He cleared his throat, tapping the other man’s easel with the clean end of a brush as soon as his hands were off it. “David, right? ‘M gonna call you Davey.” When he snorted and didn’t show any sign of hating the nickname, Jack grinned and continued. “Graduate school, huh? So what’s a busy guy like you doin’ here?”

Davey shrugged, smiling sheepishly. “My, uh, my sister booked it for me, told me that I needed to stop studying for once in my life.” He let out a chuckle, and Jack could’ve sworn he couldn’t be more infatuated with this man, but here he was. Damn. It took a few minutes to realize that he was waiting for Jack’s own reason, and he stammered out a reply. “I work here, so my mom and I get discounted tickets. It’s a weekly kinda thing?”  

“That’s awesome! So, Jack, you’re an artist?” When he nodded, Davey raised an eyebrow. “Then what are you doing in a beginner’s class, trying to make us all look bad?” He laughed as Jack sputtered, trying to come up with some kind of response that didn’t make him look like a jackass. (Get it? Jack-ass?) “It’s honestly a little mind numbing,” here he got a mild glare from Smalls, so he shot her an apologetic grin, “but it’s nice to do something easy and let my mind wander once a week.” Of course, this week, his mind decided to wander towards the tall freakin’ god in front of him.

Davey pursed his lips, before breaking into a smile. “I was honestly expecting something less deep, but.. Wow.” He let out a breath, looking down at his canvas. Jack gasped in mock offense, a hand raised to his heart. “David! I cannot believe- Are you callin’ me an idiot?” Because you’d be right, his brain filled in. Thanks, brain. Now it was the other man’s turn to flounder like a fish out of water, finally blurting “That’s no- that isn’t what I meant! Nonono, I meant that in a good way! Promise.” Jack watched him turn red with embarrassment, before the pair broke out into quiet laughter.

Before he knew it, the session was almost over. The hours passed by with easy, somewhat flirty conversation and laughing. Jack’s painting was pretty much finished, other than that face smiling back at him. In a moment of pure impulse, he decided to leave it on there. He was taking it home, Davey surely wouldn’t see it! Right..? “Hey, Jack! Can I see what yours looks like?” Well, shit. Jack chuckled nervously, shaking his head, and Davey grinned teasingly. “Oh, c’mon! It’s probably just going to make everyone feel bad about theirs or something!”

In another moment of pure impulse, he relented. He turned his canvas around, and Davey smiled. “See? That looks great!” Then, his eyes fell on the part Jack desperately wanted him to overlook, and he gasped. “Is that- is that me?” He leaned in closer, and oh boy was Jack about to melt into a little puddle of embarrassment. “Uh, maybe?” He squeaked, shuffling his feet. He was relieved to see Davey smile, blushing slightly. “It’s super good! I’m flattered.”

Jack took a deep breath, before steeling his nerves. “Um.. Could I draw you for real, sometime? And maybe take you out for a coffee after?” He was hoping for the best, but preparing for the worst. Imagine his surprise when Davey blushed further. “I’d really, um, really like that.” They made plans to meet the following Thursday, and Jack smiled. “It’s a date!” He tried not to sound as ecstatic as he felt, but it was definitely there. After they said their goodbyes, Medda winked at him, having watched this all go down. "Aw, shaddup Ma," he groaned, picking up the canvas and smiling at Davey's face chiseled into the landscape. Underneath it lay a neatly scrawled phone number, and Jack knew that he would treasure this painting for years to come.

[melodyalanaroster]

Let Me Care For You

“Please don’t wake me up, I might sleep forever. ‘Cause the sun shines cold on me. Please don’t wake me up, I might sleep forever. I don’t wanna hear the lie today��� Tomorrow won’t be okay….” the song blared as the room’s lone occupant lie beneath the covers on her bed.

It wasn’t every day that Alana’s depression got the best of her… But the people closest to her had gotten the gist that, whenever she blasted “Tomorrow” by Downplay, it was one of those days where it hit her and wouldn’t let go. Of course, most of the people outside Amouria’s Black Tower had no clue of this fact. Alana had been separate from ninety percent of the outside world for the better part of the past four and a half years… People assumed that, with everything she had gone through and what she had become, she had to have some form of depression… It was to be expected. But, she never seemed to let it get her down; or when it did, she never showed it in public.

So, when a certain blonde haired, golden eyed, punk came a knocking on her door, he simply assumed that it was something that he had done to upset her. “Alana?!” He called as he continued to knock on the door to her apartment. “Ah! Nathaniel! What are you doing here?” a voice asked from behind him. He turned around to see a girl with short black hair, translucent skin, and teal colored eyes smiling at him. “Lyra. Alana’s not answering her door. I know she’s here because she’s not in any of her other usual spots and she would tell me if she was leaving town for the weekend.” He explained, concerned. “Well, come on. I’ve got her mail and I know where the spare key is. Lyra smiled, comfortingly, as she pulled out the key and let them in.

Lyra and Nathaniel walked over to the kitchen table and she set the mail down. The apartment was quite luxurious. A sky high, state of the art, penthouse, with the perfect blend of geeky collecting and modern elegant decorations. “Well, she’s not in the main part, let’s check her bedroom.” Lyra stated. As they walked up the stairs to the door of the master suite. “I wait frozen in sorrow and on and on, and on and on it goes.” blares from the room and Lyra instantly realizes what’s going on. “Oh no!” she croaked. “What?” Nathaniel inquired. “When Melody listens to “Tomorrow” by Downplay on loop, it means that her depression is getting the best of her. I can guarantee that she’s curled up in her bed, trying to forget that she even exists.” she explained. “So, what do we do?” Nathaniel asked. “Trust me, everyone in the Senior Staff of the Red Death Regimen has tried to pull her from these waves… We usually have to wait it out because nothing we do works.” Lyra replied. “I’m not gonna sit by and do nothing!” Nathaniel declared as worry washed over his face. “Well, you love her, don’t you? Do what your heart tells you is best.” Lyra suggested as she left the apartment.

Nathaniel opened the door to the master suite and discovered exactly what Lyra had said he would. “You know? When I ignore the world, that is not an invitation for the world to come busting at my door.” a tired voice rang from the bed. “I was worried about you Alana.” Nathaniel stated as he walked towards the bed. Alana sighed. “I don’t wanna get out of bed… So, unless you wanna take off your jacket and shoes and get in this bed with me, then you’re here for nothing.” she said flatly. Nathaniel looked at the bed and thought for a minute. Alana was usually quiet and cheery outside the Tower. When she did talk, she tried to be peaceful, and she always aimed to make him smile. He walked over to the ottoman at the foot of the bed, slipped off his shoes, placed them on the floor, took off his jacket, put it on the ottoman, walked over to the bed, lifted up the comforter, and slipped into the bed. “You decided to stay.” Alana sighed as she felt Nathaniel’s chest pressed against her back. “You haven’t let me be alone since you got back… And, I’ll admit, its been rather nice… So I’m not gonna let you be alone.” Nathaniel gently confirmed as he wrapped his arms around her. Alana began to sob. “Alana! Don’t cry! Please don’t cry!” Nathaniel pleaded. Alana rolled over and buried her face in his chest. “Nath. Do you have any idea how much I’ve needed your embrace over the past few years?!” she sobbed. “Alana…” he began. “I know you don’t wanna talk about it…” she cut in. “My Melody…. We don’t need to talk about it. You’ve already told me everything…” he sighed as he ran his hand through her hair. “Oh, Nathaniel!” she sobbed.

After a few minutes of sobbing, Alana had fallen asleep. Nathaniel reached over Alana and changed the music to something soothing. “That’s enough of the sad music.” he declared. As the “Star Locket Melody” from Sailor Moon began to play, her body relaxed into his and he couldn’t help but be awestruck. It was obvious that she was paying him special attention. Whereas everyone told her to stay away from him, she ignored them and often walked up to him. She always did her best to greet him with a smile. Of course, he knew that she didn’t like everything he did, and she told him off when she saw fit.. But she always gave him another chance. She had told Rosalaya off, and made it known to everyone else that she didn’t care about his reputation… She was sticking by him this time and nothing was gonna change that. He knew she was depressed and even had a bit of PTSD. No one could go through what she’s gone through and not have them. But, unlike the rest of the outside world, Alana talked to him and was completely honest with him. He had even begun to comprehend why they broke up. She didn’t want to do it, but she had to for his protection…. The one thing she didn’t tell him about was these waves of depression.

“Alana, wake up! You’re having a nightmare!” Nathaniel shook her as she awoke. “Oh! Nath! Am I dreaming?” She gasped as she pinched herself and grabbed her glasses off the bedside table. Night had fallen, which meant that she had been asleep a couple of hours. “No you’re not. Come on, put on a bra and a pair of shoes.” Nathaniel demanded, a sweet grin appearing on his face. “Why?” Alana inquired. “Because I’m taking you out for a snack and you already look cute… So, just put on a bra and a pair of shoes so we can go.” he beamed. “Uh, okay then.” Alana replied as she rushed to her closet.

“I really shouldn’t be going out like this.” Alana considered as she grabbed her phone and they started leaving the apartment. She was wearing her Yang Xiao Long pajamas, a sports bra, long socks and a pair of slip on shoes. Definitely not the style she usually went with when she left the Black Tower… More comfortable, less dangerous, and a lot more skin showing than she usually prefers… Nathaniel looked at her and smiled. “You really do look cute Alana… But here, if it will make you more comfortable, wear this.” He chuckled as he handed her his jacket. “Are you sure?” Alana inquired, wide eyed. She knew he hated exposing his arms, because it reminded him of what his father would do to him. “Of course I’m sure.” He reassured. Alana slipped her arms through the deep green jacket. It was something she’d never wear in any other circumstance, as it was an article that reminded her of Izaya Orihara, but now, HE was handing it to her. Nathaniel, the one person outside her family that she’s loved the most for years; the only person she’s ever been in love with. It was much too big for her, but the size only added to the comfort that it provided. “Huh, you look even cuter with my jacket on.” Nathaniel cooed as they got into the elevator and started going to the ground floor.

The sight of Alana wearing her pajamas and Nathaniel’s jacket while holding his hand as they walked to the cafe was not what anyone expected. “The nacho place is closed?” Alana asked. “Not closed, just full. I would have taken you there if I could.” Nathaniel clarified. “Nachos and tacos sound really good right about now….” she muttered. “One thing that will never change about you is that Tex-Mex is some of your favorite comfort food. Its a good thing I’ve managed to remember that.” he grinned. “Am I really that predictable?” Alana asked. “Yes, but in this case, its definitely a good thing.” Nathaniel replied. When they made it to the Cozy Bear Cafe, several sets of eyes immediately darted to them. “Oi! Waiter!” Nathaniel called as they sat down at a table. “Nath, be nice.” Alana commented. “Yes?” Hyun responded, his bittersweet gaze turning soft as he looked at Alana. “Get Alana a white chocolate, hazelnut, frappe with coffee and whipped cream and a croissant.” Nathaniel ordered. “Alana? Is that what you want?” Hyun queried. “Yeah.” Alana replied. “Alright then. It’ll be out soon.” Hyun acknowledged as he wrote down the order and walked off. “Nath?” Alana asked, tired. “Yes?” Nathaniel answered. “Why are you doing this?” She questioned. Nathaniel looked at her, smiled, and held her hand. “You’re always taking care of me… Let me take care of you for once.” He cooed. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reposting due to a broken link. I really wanted to showcase a bit of Alana's depression. As an audiophile who struggles with depression, I can honestly say, "Tomorrow" by Downplay and "Asleep" by the Smiths are perfect songs that explain it.... Credit goes to: FNAFfanart67 ChiNoMiko @nathanieljacott

[livvywrites]

For the Pride Questions! #14 with Aishlynn Mynerva annnnnnd #7 with Asa Veranus

thank you!!!! and funny you should choose these two, considering i’m planning a romance for them :D which means these will work great together, honestly, so i’m going to combine them ;) 

i’m setting these in a modern au of mine i haven’t gotten to play much in :D

pride month prompts! [open]

7.  Their first outing/date that was impacted by their identity (maybe for a gender based identity, wearing something gender affirming. Maybe for an aspec, a special date that emphasizes their partners respect for their orientation)

14.  Introducing their partner

[under a cut bc this got a bit long!]

Asa picked at the sleeves of her blouse, biting her lip as she gazed in the mirror. Everything felt like too much one moment, and not enough the next. It had never been an issue before, before she had met her friends. She dressed how she felt--often turtlenecks and long skirts or very loose trousers, regardless of how she felt that day.

Then, she met Aishlynn. It didn’t take long for her to come out to her--Asa knew that a lot of people didn’t understand Aishlynn’s mannerisms, but she did, and she felt safe around Aishlynn. Safe enough to be herself, which was really all that she or anyone could ask for out of someone.

Aishlynn’s sister and friends were a different story.

It’s not that Asa didn’t think they would be accepting. She just... well. It was all still so new to her, hanging around them. She’d known Aishlynn for several years now. Talitha as well, actually, though in a more distant way. The others were... new. 

But now she and Aishlynn were dating. Which meant she was going to be around them more. And she didn’t want to have to hide part of herself, part of their relationship with this group that had become so central to Aishlynn’s life. (No matter what she said.) 

Knowing all of that, feeling all of that, didn’t stop her from being nervous, though.

There came a knock on the door.

“Asa?” It was Aishlynn. Of course it was. “We really need to be leaving soon.”

“Just a minute, darling.” Unconsciously, her voice went higher, softer than normal. She’d always had a softer and higher pitched voice than AMAB people generally had, but years of practice and work had allowed her to make it even more feminine, when she needed it to be.

“Alright,” Aishlynn said. “I’m going to tell Talitha to order your tea.”

Asa tried to frown, but wasn’t quite able to. “Underhanded,” she said. “You know I like my first cup hot.”

Aishlynn laughed. It was a wonderful sound, and not one that Asa got to hear often. She was in a good mood. It made her smile widen. “Whatever it takes to get you out the door,” she said, but Asa knew that she would wait as long as was necessary. Would cancel the whole outing if Asa said the word.

It was that thought that finally gave her the courage to open the door, and step out into the hall.

Aishlynn looked her over.

Asa hadn’t put on anything fancy. Just a nice, butter yellow sweater dress over black leggings and boots. Her hair had been braided, resting over her shoulder. Small hoop earrings completed the ensemble.

She smiled. “How do I look?”

Aishlynn took her hand. “Wonderful.”

###

The bell of the cafe tinkled as they entered. Asa could feel her palms sweating. Aishlynn paid them no mind, instead guiding her across the cafe to a corner booth.

A crumpled straw wrapper bounced off Talitha’s cheek and rolled off the table to land by Asa’s feet. None of the table’s occupants paid it any mind--they were too busy watching Talitha brace her hands on the table. “Oi!” She grasped at the straw in Lyr’s mouth, which he pulled out, laughing.

“I’m so glad to see such shining examples of maturity,” Aishlynn drawled.

Talitha turned to them with a grin. She glanced at Asa, but didn’t even bat an eye. “Right, because your reaction would have been any more dignified,” she shot back. She didn’t wait for Aishlynn to respond, though, instead looking directly at Asa.

Asa could feel her heart beat faster.

“You look lovely, feathers,” she said. “Though, there is a distinct lack of... feathers.”

Asa snorted. “Believe it or not, I don’t wear them every day.” She paused. “And... thanks.”

Talitha grinned. “So, like, are you trans? Nonbinary? Using gender neutral pronouns, or feminine ones? Or! Or, wait, is this like, you still prefer masculine pronouns but you just like wearing traditionally feminine clothes? Or--”

Alinora yanked Talitha back into the booth, though this had a side effect of causing her to fall in Alinora’s lap. “Give Asa a chance to answer,” she said, and Asa appreciated the purposeful lack of pronouns.

“I’m genderfluid,” she said. “Today I’m feeling more feminine. Feminine pronouns are appreciated, but neutral and masculine pronouns are fine too.”

Talitha squinted at her. “Are they, or are you just sayin’ that to make it easier on us, because, believe me, I can handle the--”

Alinora covered her mouth. “Aishlynn wouldn’t let her lie to us, Tali,” she said, in a voice of long-suffering patience. 

Lyr nodded. “It’s true.” He glanced at Asa, and then at her hands joined with Aishlynn’s. “Don’t think that’s the only thing that they came to tell us, either.”

It was Aishlynn who answered this time, lifting and extended their conjoined hands. “We’re dating,” she said, plain and simple--as she preferred. It made Asa smile.

Talitha raised her glass. “Hear, hear! Congratulations!”

Lyr joined suit, and after a shared glance, so did Ava and Alinora.

Alinora lowered her glass and looked at Aishlynn. “So is that where you’ve been disappearing to? Date night?”

Aishlynn nodded. She and Asa slid into the empty seats--Asa next to Talitha, because Aishlynn sitting next to her was always a disaster, and Aishlynn next to Ava.

Alinora glanced at Asa. “You’ll be coming around the house more too, won’t you?”

“If that’s okay?”

Alinora shrugged. “Aish’s house. I have a system, though. I’ll run it through with you.”

“It’s not complicated,” Talitha said. “Don’t worry ‘bout it.”

“If it’s not complicated, why do you mess it up every time you come over?” 

“Because you’re adorable when you yell at me~”

Alinora scowled.

Aishlynn snorted. “I did warn you she was obnoxious,” she said, and reached over to take Asa’s hand over the table.

Talitha gagged playfully, which caused Alinora to dump her into the floor. Lyr laughed, Ava rolled her eyes fondly, Aishlynn hid her smile into her shoulder, and Asa?

Asa relaxed into her chair, taking the drink Ava slid her, and smiled into her cup.

adding the taglist even though it’s modern au. lemme know if you don’t want to be added for modern au stuff! 

taglist: @quartzses​​; @idreamonpaper​​; @runningonrain​​; @witchywrite​​; @queenofsquirrelsstuff​​; @margaretcroftwrites​​; @purpleshadows1989​​; @klywrites​​; @she-writes-love​​; @sixstepsaway​​; @neptune-nereid​​; @firesidefantasy​​; @joshuaorrizonte​; @waterfallwritings​; @languageisbae​; @lady-redshield-writes​​; @luciellesgarden​​; @dogwrites​; @quilloftheclouds​; @natalierosewrites​; @toboldlywrite​; @alternativeforensicscientist​; @jcckwrites​; @fictionshewrote​; 

[cheswirls]

a quick sum-up of che’s future career plans, bc reasons

im halfway through the dive!! anime show that came out this summer season, and i’m having a lot of thoughts, and plus i finished going through all the footage i missed today of skate america while i was at a bball game, and it’s made me realize different things i guess? 

it might be mid-long length so its going under a cut, but to gain intereststart off, this is all about my desire to be an athletic trainer for the usa olympic center at colorado springs, co !

ive been an at(now when you see that abb. you know what it means hah!! not assistant teacher hmm) student since my freshman year of high school, and i’ve loved it a whole bunch. back then i was set on going to columbia U for their writing program, and i wanted to major in graphic design afterwards/during/it wasnt super planned out i was a fr. i didnt know what bfa or mfa stood for yet. it wasnt until end of sophomore year than i thought about being an at for realsies.

but i also still loved gd. so there was a confliction there.

junior year i took a break from working volleyball in the fall and did my one and only year of football and it was terrible primarily bc the team i worked with didnt know how to function as a group and half the group were selfless bitch whores but like thats another storyyy, secondly bc i jus really discovered i didnt care abt football at all. it was mostly for the experience and i gained it and i liked it bc i hung out w a lot of people from helping out w varsity (i was one of two our of the five juniors that had been there since my fr year and was only on jv bc it was my first year w football, but one of the seniors had to work a bunch so when they needed an extra person i was the one w the most experience so i was w them a lot,) point was it was fun!!! and you have fun w ppl you like that you dont work w all the time and i shouldnt say fun bc lots of times it was awful,

basically! it was fun being w the varsity trainers which were the seniors and the other junior that had been around since fr year. volleyball was fun but it had always been a one-at-student-per-team sport , so it was different jus being w other ats that shared the same team and not the same sport(which in the us is made up of at least three different teams, a fr,jv,and varsity). it was a more open environment and so it inspired a lot of talk with the at grad students we had that semester (we got 3-4 every semester in a partnership w the D1 uni in town, it was always cool to hear stories from them!) and anyway i remember talking w a couple of the grads one practice and we were discussing all the different occupations athletic trainers could have, and what they wanted to work with in the future, and the topic veered towards professional sports and the olympics.

i thought it was really cool when we were talking about it, and then we got busy and it flew out of my mind. i dont remember when it came back and became a focus, but sometime before my senior year, i had decided i wanted to work at the olympic level.

real quick i mentioned gd and the struggle, so to bring that into focus, my junior year i took a whole bunch of different tech classes (gd&i, compsci, webtech) and in one of those, i had the opportunity to go to a ... i cant remember what the term was for it, but it was kinda an event for gd students and it had a little competition and stuff, and it was really fun! nd you got a lot of info abt the community college hosting it and i learned their program was really good, so the gd versus at internal struggle continued, and i remember talking to my sponsor teacher (she actually taught all three of my tech classes that year aaa i loved her) about how i didnt know what to do and shit and i dunno what she told me but like, i think she was trying to be encouraging but she basically said it was up to me, like she didnt try and nod me into a direction, that i can recall.

so SOMEHOW bc i honestly cannot remember, by senior year i’ve decided that im gonna jus fuck it and pick BOTH and double major in gd and athletic training. AND i had it all planned out, where i was gonna get a degree in gd and open up an online business, and then go into a masters program for at and then enter into the olympic field. 

by this point creative writing is still cool and a great hobby but i couldnt possibly double major AND have a minor that’d be too much. id still love to take a cw course tho one day.

basically a buncha crazy stuff happened that first semester but by winter break i had an acceptance letter to a uni a couple hours north of home with a good accredited undergrad program (accredited basically means you graduate w a masters in four years so its fasttracked which woulda been great but uh..) and by the time i found out that next semester that they were doing away with the accredited program i was already too emotionally invested to consider panic-switching(panic bc it was february and id already been admitted hah...) but i decided it’d be okay. basically if you dont remember/werent around one of my school’s head ats died in a car crash died around early october ‘16. she went to undergrad where i go now, and i’d talked to her about it september that semester wondering if she knew anything abt their program and uh surprise, she’d done the same program small world. after the funeral in november and a ton of thought i applied there. (november was.. crazy in general last year. rly crazy)

may was when i started adding on sports to the future olympics job, bc i started thinking about it and after finally getting a friend to watch yuri on ice, he started making his was through all of sochi’s figure skating stuff, and then the 2010 vancouver olympics, and i decided i wanted to recap a bit on that too.

the 2010 olympics was really my first experience with figure skating. i’m a west texas gal and so theres not a lot out here to get exposed to, so seeing these best-of-the-best class sports was fun, and the earliest experience i can remember of such. i was in fifth grade so i dont remember a ton, but i do remember being captivated by korea’s yuna kim, who won gold that year in fs. shes an fs legend at this point, so if you’re into figure skating and don’t know who she is, go look her up. you wont be disappointed.

in 2012 was the london olympics. i remember a lot from it, like watching the opening ceremony with my parents and seeing the queen jump out of a helicoptor(which is like,, still cool to this day wow) and being fascinated my michael phelps and all the swimming he did so grandly. it was also my first real exposure to diving. the oldest i could recall anything abt the sport was at a pizza hut somewhere.. in town i think, and i was w my best friend at the time and my mom was there so i think maybe we were on the way back from the lake??? sounds right, i think. and we were talking abt how i always held my nose when i went underwater bc i didnt know how to not get water all up my nostrils and be underwter(and i still dont to this day aha) and she mentioned like, joining a diving team would be cool! would help me get over it and all! and i like recalling it dunno what she was talking abt bc we lived in dirt city nothing so i highly doubt there was or is any sort of diving sport happening. swimming, yeah maybe, there were lessons at pools and bodyworks areas around town, competitive teams im not sure tho, but not diving like at all so??? dunno.

so my next and technically first real experience with it was watching the london olympics. and i thought, wow, this is so neat!! i watched from that one day like the opening events, and i think i was old enough to search online like yea i had a laptop by then so i looked up the schedule for the things i wanted to see most of, and i ended up watching i think most of the diving events (i missed a couple for.. archery, i think? maybe?) and absolutely loving it. iunno what it was, maybe something i never thought i could do?(bc not hold my nose?? while i dove???????? scaryy) but i enjoyed it a bunch.

i was older when sochi was a thing, my 8th grade year. i was able to appreciate things a lot more. when i tuned into events, tony hawk and snowboarding were the main focus, but figure skating was on a lot as well. i had a tv in my room by that point, so if i didnt like what was playing on the main tv, i could go watch another event. i learned a lot of names and faces through that, and so while my bff was watching it our senior year if i was with him id point out skaters and their nationalities and stuff, like yuzuru hanyus always been a modern day household name w figure skating, but i leanred abt him BECAUSE of the sochi olympics, and he was one of the ones i’ve never forgotten. i really really liked it, so much that i watched worlds after, and around the same time my fr year, i tuned in to just the worlds championship again. i didn’t pick up trying to watch grand prix(which is their regular season, for those unaware) season until my junior year, and most of it was day-or-two-late videos from youtube, since the ice channel i think it a paid-for thing (i still dont know much abt it hah) and nothing was on tv otherwise, aside from the skate america event. but since that first time after sochi, ive always been around watching worlds fs near the beg of each year. i’d familiarized myself by senior year with the fs world, and actually,

early (i think march?) of my junior year, i searched up trying to find a figure skating anime at the time. and what did i find?? ginban, the only figure skating anime at the time. i watched like maybe all of one episode, it was abt a girl who shared her body w the ghost of a former figure skater while she was competing in events, and it was.. okay? lackluster, in the animation dept, but it was a 2005 show so.. yeah.

so after that i was like kk that wasnt good lets find another. and i didnt. not yet, anyway. instead, i found an announcement for violet evergarden’s animated adaptation, and yuri on ice, a realistic adaptation of the sport of figure skating. thats bolded bc its important. i found that shit abt yoi before it even had a promo poster, certainly before the pv came around that got everyone hyped up. i found it bc i was looking for figure skating in the first place. in fact, i think when the pv came out and got popular, i didnt even relate it to the upcoming fs anime i’d read about previously. it took me a bit to connect the dots. 

watching yuri on ice at the same time as the gp 2016 season was surreal, but really interesting. i got my bff into it before the second to last episode came out, and i only remember that bc he finally showed any interest when he found something on twitter abt it being gay (newsflash/// hes gay, and before yoi his fav show was no6 bc that was as close as it got. he still rly likes it, we both do, but his solid favc is now definitely yoi. representation matters and all) and was like well now i HAVE to watch it and i was all yes it ends soon so pls. and he watched it twice in a weekend, and thrice before the finale came out, and then a few more times after that, iunno how many times but certainly more thn i have(i went back after the .. maybe ep 10? w/e ending had the after party reveal that changed everything, so i went back to analyze everything before the next ep) and between the week of 11 and finale 12, he started watching the sochi fs competition, and then the 2010 after the show ended w ep 12. 

seeing this great fs show and getting a friend into the world of figure skating really renewed my love for it all. before the semester went out i went back and watched the reruns of the sochi fs stuff. and by may i’d decided i wanted to cosider that to be the sport i worked with.

with diving, it took a similar twist. in the form of the rio 16 olympics. i was all over that shit, i downloaded an nbc app on my phone so i could watch events live while i traveled with volleyball to a tournament in dallas and while i was at practice w them at home and generally jus away from the house and a tv. i planned that shit out had a schedule and everything for what i was watching live, and a lot of it was swimming, but a whoooole lot of live stuff was the diving. 

in the hotel room in dallas the tv would always be on to w/e olympics events were airing at the time, either track or diving tho, one or the other, or recaps. quite a few girls ended up in the room in the evening and we’d all do stuff and watch in passing at the same time, and it was suuuuuper fun. watching the chinese women perform flawlessly and walk away w all the gold was fun, but finding a good commentator to actually say such was a disheartening challenge( one of the most memorable moments w live commentary that year was hearing a woman say of one of the chinese ladies that she’d done better before, after they revealed her personal best score ever like rly cmon be unbiased and jus passionate abt the sport youre covering pls.

ive always been super fond of the diving scene. it may not be as much as fs, but honestly, i wish i grew up in an area w a diving team now, or wish i could try it out now, bc thats how much fun it seems. i still wanna go up to the big city like 30min away from uni and learn to ice skate in the civic center there, but hands down if i had to pick a sport to join tomorrow or die i’d pick diving. 

so also by may, and throughout the culmination of senior year, diving was the second sport on the olympic to-train-for list. you get a five-year contract w the olympics, now i think it’s usa as a whole and i think its by center so say, if i get a job in colorado springs i cant apply in another five years to chula vista or even like lake placid, but iunno for sure. the five-year thing is involved somehow bc i’ve heard it from a physical therapist and trainer-that-works-in-a-sports-med-clinic duo in one body named sarah, who’s been contracted out from the clinic by my high school since junior year also, bc she knows people who’ve worked w the olympics, and then another from church that worked w olympics that knows my family uh iunno how well but i know of him, i think he also works in the clinic as some sort of on-hand surgeon but a diff person than who sarah knew. so its five years somehow and then i’ll take my bfa in gd and open my online business and do that from a studio at home and look after my owl/cat pet combo.

since may, it had been ‘olympics, with either figure skating or diving’. and it stayed that for a long time. now, since a couple weeks ago, and this is again while gp season is happening for fs, its diving. i wanna work w the usa olympic diving team as their team athletic trainer, and i cant do it this summer bc i have to have completed two years of uni, instead of a certain standing, like be a junior, but so NEXT summer, before my senior year of uni, (i came in a sopho so 6 sem only ah) i’m applying for an internship at the center in colorado springs, and that’s the team i hope i work with. 

now i tell people, diving, but if i get offered figure skating, i’ll take it, but diving is the goal now. if i love it and wanna continue professionally, great, i can do that and have an online gd shop. and if i decide i want something different? i’ll work olympics and then join w a professional-level figure skating i actually dunno how it works. coach, and their skater in turn. coach, with multiple skaters under them. a culmination of diff usa skaters. w/e, something in the professional fs world.

and thats uh, thats it! dive has been so much fun to watch, and i realize i talk a lot on here about working w basketball and being an at student in general and the vast majority have no idea what i mean, so hopefully this clarifies. thank you!!