#holy shit its si fuckin cute!!!!!

[maiseui]

holy. fucking. shit. THIS WAS INSANE. THIS CHAPTER FUCKING ATE LIKE CRAZY HOLY CRAP I CANNOT BELIEVE U DID IT???? YOU REVIVED MIND GAMES??? LITERALLY ONE OF UR BEST FICS TO DATE???? HOLY FUCK

LEMME TELL U THIS WHOLE CHAPTER HAD ME FUCKING SCREAMING RUNNING LAPS AROUND THE ROOM KICKING MY FEET EATING MY TOES I WAS GOING CRAZY BROOOOOOOOOOO 😭😭😭⁉️😆😆😆 BROO THE WAY JK WANTS ME TO GO FUCKING CRAZY PULLING OUT MY HAIR IN THIS FIC ITS WILDDD 😆😆😆😆😆😆

I LOVED IT. I LOVED THIS CHAPTER SO MUCH IT GENUINELY WAS SO SOSOSOS CAPTIVATING. firstly I was chuckling at namjoon like hOMIE WAS STRESSEDDDD about the whole scandal thing Im so sorry for laughing but the way jk just blatantly ignored him and began the live so abruptly GEN MADE ME LAUGH. like all namjoon's little sighs legit were so ENTERTAINING 😭 JUST THE WHOLE TANDEM WITH SEOKJIN YOONGI AND ALL THE OTHER MEMBERS WAS OSO ENTERTAINING TOO I LOVE THEIR DYNAMIC :< MAN U DO SO WELL CAPTURING THIS LIKE group roommates!au cos lets be real if we think ab that situation irl its kinda weird af but U MAKE IT SEEM SO NATURAL bc of the way the conversation flows so well? ? anyways all this to Basically Say I love the dialogue and the banter it's so well written I Lurve It. ALSO ‼️ just the way they care about aeum is so heartwarming like WOW. at certain parts I was felt genuinely touched at the way they kept drawing everything back to how she would ultimately be the one who was going to get the brunt of everything :< I hate that it's true and I'm kinda glad you highlighted this,, like female idols will get FUCKING SHAT ON for doing the same shit male idols do ????? but anyways I digress - — - THI SWAS SO GOOD. THE THEMES HERE WERE SO STRONG I REALLY LOVED THE WAY EVERYTHING UNFOLDED

LEMME TELL U I FUCKING SCREAMED WHEN HE PULLED HER INTO THAT ROOM 😭 BROOOO I JUST LOVE THE PUSH AND PULL ASPECT OF THIS FIC LIKE I GET IT WE HATE TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS WE HATE VAGUE MEN BUT DAMN BABY WHY DO I LOOOVE VAGUE MEN WHY IS THIS TOXICITY MAKING ME TWIRL MY HAIR AND GIGGLE ? ? ?? ? ? ?DAMN 😭⁉️ it's jut the way everything is written like WOWEEE I cannot express enough that I feel like you really really really nailed your characterisation here and it really really elevated the entire chapter for me - just having so much insight into aeum's pain genuinely left me speechless at parts. THE "YOU WANT TO GOUGE YOUR HEART" SENTENCE WAS INSANE. IT MADE MY JAW DROP. IT WAS SOS OSOSOSOS PERFECT?? LIKE SHE JUST WANTS TO SHOW HIM HER HEART AND HONESTLY HE PROBABLY DOESN'T REALISE THE EXTENT OF HIS OWN ACTIONS UNTIL SHE DOES??? BROO I WANT JK TO EAT SHITTTT like don't get me wrong he's perfect he's flawless in this fic (we love toxic men) but also why r u playing aeum like that. 😟 I kinda love how u showed where his mindset is that: that when he's with her, logic just flies out the window but when there's distance he kind of sobers up and tries to draw the line again. I really respect him bc obviously he's a leader and he really doesn't downplay the responsibility that comes with it: he cares a lot about the group and I think just drawing that distance from aeum aligns with his big big big passion and love for the group and what they do :< it's kind of sad yk like he's suffering in his own way LET THAT BOY LOVE ☹️

HIS id rather kiss u than focus on a game; id rather sleep with you than compete FUCING BYEEEE BITCH WHY DID YOU INCLUDE THAT. AOPUFEHJWIOHU2IUPHW SI FUCING LOST IT LIKE HOLY MOTHER FUCKING SHIT BRO LET ME FIND A GUY WHO SAYS THAT SHIT TO MEEEE 😭😭 FUCKIN SOBBING SMEARING MY SHIT ON THE WALLS UGH I LOVE LOVE LOVE JK'S DIALOGUE IN THIS FIC IT'S INSANE. also "all yours" was SO HEARTBREAKING. JUST THE WAY HE relinquishes everything in the interests of keeping the group together is :((( so :((( :((( :(((( :((( but anwayy.

TAEHYUNG !!!!! BRO!!! YOURE SSO CUTE N FOR WHATTTT LIKE JUST HIS CHARACTER IN GENERAL HE'S THE PERFECT SECOND MALE LEAD NO CAP 1!!!!! the ducking last line?? THE WAY HE ALWAYS RUNS TO AEUM'S DEFENCE AND THE WAY HE WAS LIKE NO JK IT'S NOT JUST "ANY MEMBER" IT'S AEUM U FUCKIG BITCH. like dude fuck yea. jk literally needs someone like that; someone who's going to shove shit in his face; someone who's going to ignite that little fire within him so that he has enough strength to fight for the girl I LOVE IT SO MUCH I LOVE THEIR DYNAMIC JUST EVERYTHING

btw the blade was scary MOMMY COME PICK ME UP ??? BROOOO WHO IN TEH FUCUUCUKKK 😭 ALSO THE WEIRDO WHO KEEPS MESSAGING AEUM UMMMMM. ?>>>>???????????

jeon jungkook drives you to think strict criticism isn’t too bad, purely because you didn’t expect things to turn a bit steamier than intended.

as the one and only female esports player, misery was at your fingertip when your skills suddenly deteriorated. however, the stoic leader of your team—jungkook, simply couldn’t sit back. he puts you back on track, yet no one told you sparks would fly; and the crazy fact that it’s inevitable.

pairing : jungkook x you (as aeum). au(s) : tsundere!jungkook, leader!jungkook, gamer!jungkook, roommates!au. genres : fluff, (intense) mutual pining, slowburn, innuendos of suggestive themes, (a sick) love triangle.

content : you thought your skill was the one problem here, but you eventually realise you’re quite surrounded by guys that you’d like to go on your honeymoon with. clearly, consequences follow since you’re not the only person who thinks so (the rest of the world does too).

peek jungkook’s mind in this playlist.

previous chapter. next chapter. chapter directory. masterlist.

chapter six.

word count : 6.2k.

namjoon furrows his brows in flourishing concern. “you shouldn’t be reading every hate comment of yours.”

“not every.” you cheekily wave a finger of disapproval at namjoon. “they just happen to tag along with the positive comments.” 

“still,” taehyung exhales loudly as if it’s his loss.

what you said is true, and the others have the wrong idea. to you, those comments rub onto you like dirt—annoying, a bit upsetting at first, but later, you just roll your eyes and brush it off.

because what girl wouldn’t be envious of you?

come on, you’d be burning in jealousy and sighing loudly if the news broke out one day and said your favourite celebrity—j-hope, is getting married—or already has four children of his own.

social media was harsh to you at the start of your career, but the moment you proved them wrong with your scores in-game, the majority of the commenters dropped a bit of their rage towards you.

but today, the world is crueller than you ever imagined it to be.

and like how thanos snapped his fingers and caused destruction in another universe, you’ve also become a menace to society like him, causing utmost destruction.

“so,” jungkook disrupts the silence with one word. “our best bet is for me to go live and clarify the news?” it’s just jungkook, but everyone’s guises turn serious as their shoulders visibly tense, including yourself. 

you’re slightly worried about this, since you’re very sure there would be people who’d lower their gazes and scoff at jungkook’s fearless yet brazen approach towards the scandalous news. because knowing him, he wouldn’t seem apologetic at all. the man is empathetic to an extent, but it only applies if it’s reasonable.

“realistically, jungkook’s stance is what everyone is looking forward to.” namjoon says. “his words would matter the most, and it’d extinguish the fire faster than anything else.”

“wouldn’t that put aeum in an uncomfortable position?” taehyung steps forward, breaking the intimate circle of your members to confront both namjoon and jungkook’s idea. “it’ll look like she’s relying on jungkook’s opinion.” he crosses his arms in obvious disdain. “that won’t settle any rage directed at her.”

jungkook exhales a loud breath. “silence will fuel the media more.” he cuts himself short; you can tell his head has plotted a full, convincing argument to disagree, but he keeps it locked down for taehyung.

“i wasn’t suggesting silence,” taehyung puts a hand on top of jungkook’s shoulder before peering up into his eyes with a tense smile. “like you said, it’d fuel them more, and even then, aeum would still be taking the biggest fall.” he clicks his tongue, “you wouldn’t want that.”

“speaking for yourself.” unlike taehyung, jungkook deadpans instead of dealing with the flagged skinship. flinging the hand on his shoulder looks like his last priority.

“maybe.” taehyung replies.

yoongi’s sigh is only audible to you, since he happens to be right next to you. “didn’t think i’d see them like this again.” 

“fire and ice,” jimin says curtly.

“scary stuff.” seokjin murmurs.

“you’re older than both of them.” jimin snorts.

“cockroaches could be a day old and i’d still be scared shitless.” seokjin says rather seriously.

jimin flashes him a look of slight disgust before slowly bobbing his head in understanding. “honestly,” he taps his chin in wonder. “i kind of get that.”

namjoon roughly shakes his head at their bickering, and seokjin and jimin mutually come to a wordless agreement of shutting up, only because the flame circling jungkook and taehyung is intensifying even through great silence. their eyes are sharp like knives and their lips remain thin and curved.

you cautiously eye taehyung’s hand on jungkook’s shoulder, gulping at it. “my friends,” you whisper lousily. “i have a mouth and some intelligence, let me partake in my own matters.”

jungkook and taehyung stare at you in unison like you’re a toddler unable to make decisions. 

screw these guys!

you throw your arms in disbelief. “i’m definitely coming out of my mother’s womb earlier than both of you in my next life.”

“what happens if aeum and jungkook confirm the dating news?” jimin randomly asks.

you flash your narrowed eyes at jimin, hoping he figures out the fact that you are now offended. jeon jungkook was the one to instantly shut you down with denial the moment he heard that his glittery reputation is about to go downhill.

“it’s a misunderstanding.” he said.

“it’s a misunderstanding.” he actually said.

“it’s a misunderstanding.” he said genuinely.

beautiful reminder to tell you to never fall for your leader and to never fantasise about you and his future again.

“that was out of genuine curiosity.” jimin shoots both his hands up in the air; surrendering, to dodge any judgement.

“take a better look at the situation, my friend.” seokjin says. “let’s say aeum and taehyung confirmed to be dating, the majority would probably applaud and celebrate that their long ship has finally sailed.” he explains dramatically. “but if aeum and jungkook are something?”

“everyone would be upset since jungkook has the biggest fanbase, and the most questionable and intense female fans.” jimin finishes. “even worse because aeum and jungkook were never seen together until today.”

“there we go.” seokjin nods in approval.

“we’re going off track.” taehyung warns. “let’s listen to coach.”

“if we were to confirm, the rage towards aeum would multiply and jungkook would lose a quarter of his fanbase. fans will also start to become more personal, so it’ll be a matter of time until they send out private threats and malicious comments. not to mention, other teams would look down on us since we’d consume the media for dating news.” namjoon answers truthfully. “we should avoid that at all costs. not just for the team, but for aeum and jungkook.”

“and if we go along with jungkook going live and explaining the truth?” yoongi asks, sounding more invested in the conversation than before.

“it’d make things quieter in general.” namjoon clarifies. “the news about aeum and jungkook will be reduced, but we can’t expect people to stop talking about it. the public attention will still be ours, but it’ll eventually settle down after a week or two.”

“should we be worried about the malicious comments directed at aeum?” yoongi asks again. “we can clearly see that she’s the most affected.”

“realistically speaking, we won’t be able to block off every negative comment directed at her.” namjoon exhales a deep sigh, “we’ll definitely try our best though.”

you shake your head profusely, hoping to decline the protection of your members. “stop it,” you huff lightly. “i only want you to keep practicing with me until the tournament.”

“jungkook?” namjoon calls out.

turning your head to where namjoon’s concerned gaze is headed, you spot jungkook turning on his computer over at his usual desk. he almost tosses himself into the seat, getting quite comfortable before setting up his live broadcast settings in front of you and the rest of the team’s confused faces.

“jungkook.” taehyung calls out as well, except sounding more stern.

“at least try to smile, captain.” you trudge over to his side, ready to witness his deadpanning announcement towards the audience. the comment section won’t be much of an entertaining sight, but jungkook definitely will be.

“just talk for a long while, jung—” namjoon tries to fit in his advice, but jungkook doesn’t even hesitate to click the ‘live’ button. “oh, jesus.” he drops his forehead, feeling the urge to conceal his identity from the audience out of embarrassment.

just like that, the earlier conversation naturally dissipated. there’s no way anyone can speak up when every given second is getting broadcasted for the public audience with venomous tongues.

the members begin acting like they were busy with at least something—seokjin quickly jumps onto the couch and whips out his phone, continuing with his webtoon. yoongi and jimin, on the other hand, are hopeless. they literally act like they’ve been forced and paid to act—looking up at the ceiling and scratching their necks awkwardly. all of them look stupid and oblivious behind jungkook’s still expression.

“i’d sincerely like to apologise for any inconvenience our actions have caused.” jungkook finally says, but he meets silence after his one sentence. his eyes are glued to the comments rolling up crazily. “the admins will blacklist anyone that fits. i won’t tolerate any harassment towards any of our members.”

your eyes widen in panic, a flush overtaking you upon hearing jungkook’s blatant boldness. you’re desperate to jump into the rescue of your team’s supporters, but you know very well they won’t be welcoming you, especially beside your annoyingly famous leader who keeps shutting you down like his computer.

visibly, namjoon is as frustrated as you are. he’s already thinking of closing statements to the media once they try to make a topic out of jungkook’s nonchalance in front of such scandalous news. the way he’s sighing with all his might surprisingly kindles a quiet chuckle amongst the members, only because he looks overly dramatic whenever he does start to project his soft anger. 

“i was worried about aeum catching a cold.” jungkook confesses the truth fearlessly. “the tournament is right around the corner. i was simply trying to minimise all risks regarding our team’s health.”

you knew that jungkook isn’t the type to beat around the bush, but you definitely didn’t predict his demeanour to be like this at all. he’s more confrontational than you ever thought. what can you expect though? it’s jungkook—the leader, at the end of the day.

his gaze casted downwards, jungkook breaks into a scoff and shakes his head. “if a team leader can’t look after his teammates, i consider them incapable.”

jungkook is too good at this.

he’s proving the viewers wrong by exaggerating his role in the team, and everything he’s pointing out is utterly understandable. he knows repeating facts is the best method to kill fire.

jungkook sighs irritatedly at the viewer’s reactions. it’s no doubt they’re going crazy over his exaggerated care towards you—the only female player in the team. “there are terms and conditions we agreed to.” he explains calmly, “dating is prohibited.”

oh…

it’s clear that the corner of your lips sink at the rule. it hasn’t been long since you started feeling this way for jungkook, and you never really thought about it being prohibited. you totally forgot about that, and for some reason, you dreamed that there was nothing wrong with this blooming feeling until now.

few seconds in, you blink out of thought to hurriedly bury your emotion by pursing your lips together. in your peripheral vision, there’s taehyung leaning against a wall. your lips zip up even tighter when you realise that he’s staring at you in concern.

with your eyes travelling back to the ongoing broadcast, you catch jungkook free of stress. his eyes have softened and so have the comments. “we’ll see you at the tournament,” he says. “stay safe and take care of yourselves in the meantime.” 

like that, everyone breathes out loud as soon as jungkook turns off his own broadcast. the livestream was short and impactful, maybe like how namjoon pictured. 

“you scared the living shit out of all of us!” seokjin yells from the couch. “please give us a warning next time.”

“you did well.” namjoon praises the outcome. “it was smart of you to keep it short and not react to any of the opinions.” 

“i agree,” jimin says. “let’s just wait it out now.”

you shake your head, letting out an extensive breath. “i’m really, really, really sorry this happened.” 

“we’re all close like family, aeum.” taehyung reassures from where he is. “this would’ve happened sooner or later.” he hints cryptically.

“that’s true.” you nod. “since we’re all close like family.” you repeat, acknowledging taehyung’s thoughts towards you.

“it’d be wise of us to all stay inside as much as possible.” namjoon suggests. “it’ll still take time for the public to settle down.”

“never went out anyway.” yoongi’s eyes pan around the living room.

“seokjin, we’ll be counting on you for our meals.” jimin cracks into a smile. “we’ll all camp inside and practice.”

“i am a filler member of the team, not the chef.” seokjin stands up with a stomp, pumping his chest out to defend himself. “but i’ll do it anyway.” he then says.

“jungkook, could you lead today’s training?” namjoon walks over to jungkook and places a hand on his shoulder. “i have to head over to the company today because of the news.”

“yeah,” jungkook says. “don’t worry.” 

“alright, i’ll check back in later.” namjoon heaves out a sigh, knowing there’s heaps of work piled up for him. he straightens out the wrinkles of his blazer before waving goodbye wordlessly.

“we’re starting.” jungkook announces. “sign in and i’ll send everyone a party invitation.” he spins in his seat to face the entire team standing in front of him. jungkook eyes everyone individually, including you. again, he treats you like everyone else. “we don’t have much time.”

“sounds good.” taehyung is the first person to obediently march over to his computer at jungkook’s word. it’s like their argument never happened, but you assume this is professionalism.

eventually, everyone gathers and sits in front of their computers. the semi-circle is complete once again today, and you feel strangely protected—like you can overcome anything with these people surrounding you.

like taehyung said, they’re family.

your family.

you take your seat beside jungkook, and that’s when he finally turns his head to look at you wholly. you didn’t expect that, especially after being disappointed countless times on your own today. 

“how do you feel?” jungkook asks you directly.

“safe.” smiling gently, you answer honestly.

jungkook nods once and fixes his gaze back onto his computer screen. his hand is tightly latched onto his mouse as he invites everyone into his team.

with the invitation pending on your screen, you just quietly observe the side of his face, again taking interest in the scar on his cheek. he never fails to capture your interest, but it doesn’t seem that way for him.

how can you change that?

sighing out loud, you decide to focus on your game instead. you press on the tick to your right, accepting jungkook’s request as usual. each banner in the lobby gets filled right away with the usernames of your members, but that’s when you see a private message sent to your chat box.

[34742748382] : ahhhh i didn’t expect jungkook to respond that fast with a livestream lol

[34742748382] : i guess i should try harder ^^

[34742748382] : good luck with today’s practice!!!!!!! it’s not long till the tournament

again?

it’s them again.

you hold in your breath as you feel your chest tighten in fright again when you see the same username from before—that time jungkook tried to hide the messages from you. whoever they are—they’re back, but you can’t afford to freak out. 

not when the team is practicing.

scouring all your members’ faces, they all look equally concentrated to practice. no one here is on a different page. there’s determination in their eyes, which is beyond normal because the tournament is really near.

you quickly move your cursor above the username, blocking them to ensure no other messages come through. maybe your clicks were a little too aggressive, jungkook is fast to notice that something is out of place for you.

“aeum.” jungkook mutters under his breath.

“privacy, please!” you hiss quietly, feigning composure at the situation eating you alive. the anonymous’ words are preying on you bit by bit. “my little brother was spamming stupid messages in-game, spilling my old secrets and everything—”

“what’s his name?” jungkook asks, and the rest of the members hear.

um.

“my little brother’s name?” you question obliviously.

jungkook crosses his arms. “do you prefer me to ask what secrets?”

bursting into a tense laughter, your gaze bounces from jungkook to taehyung, jimin and yoongi before coming back to meet your leader’s stare. “jeno.” you toss an answer. “that’s his name.”

“is he teasing you again?” taehyung suddenly inserts, supporting your atrocious lie. he’s making you even more anxious because now you’ve got two people to explain to and beg for forgiveness if you ever get caught.

but now, you can slip out of this thanks to taehyung.

“he doesn’t learn.” you shake your head while smiling innocently at taehyung who’s in the corner. he’d never understand the meaning behind your smile though.

“aeum and jeno?” jimin repeats from metres away. “your parents are too good with names.”

“right?” you take your chance to side with jimin too. “we better get to it before i start missing them.” you say aloud, but it’s basically addressed to jungkook. “i might just run away.”

jungkook collects a deep breath as if he’s decided. “is everyone ready?”

practice ended in time with the sunset; an aurora of pink, orange and red is presented to you and the rest of your team who isn’t too bothered by the snuggly colours in the sky. it’s almost time to eat dinner, but you’d much prefer to return when you’re not caged by the thought of someone’s animosity from before. they’ve been in your mind ever since.

my god… you feel like you’ve aged ten years.

you are a corpse. 

you are disintegrating.

and you hate that you’re still wondering about what tonight’s dinner might be.

in general, you feel baffled. you don’t feel too depressed, only because you genuinely do feel infinitely supported. that’s why you’ve still got the perseverance to ponder about dinner and smile when you want to. however, you can’t help but to feel disturbed about what could potentially come. you’re still far from becoming numb when you stumble across comments on the internet. how will you condone direct attacks? are you perfectly valid to be thinking about that—or are you merely overreacting because you’re flustered from the consistency of a single person behind anonymity?

distracted, you lift yourself off your chair, slide off the headset tightened around your ears, stretch your arms as you head towards the stairs. you’re the first person to sign out today. it’s only expected of you, especially after that disaster.

at times like this, you sincerely wish you could run back home.

when you reach the second floor, you slowly drag your feet to your room. there’s a fair distance for you since yoongi’s room comes first, then jimin, seokjin, jungkook and then it’s yours before taehyung. the rooms are all aligned horizontally. 

as you pass the first two doors, a door swings open in front without any warning. a draft of wind shoots out, and your body jerks in surprise. you pause for a few seconds to avoid any means of planting your nose into the door, then take the initiative to walk around, still hoping to make it to your sweet destination.

wait.

isn’t that—

before you can even think, a firm force grasps your wrist to tug you into the room. you gasp in the midst, but your following breath is stolen when you lay your eyes on the owner of the room.

it was brief, but you’re not mistaken.

when did he get here?

the scent of soap is pungent—it hypnotises all your senses when your body thuds against jungkook’s chest. with your face buried into the softness of his new black t-shirt he changed into, you’re swept in a complete daze. your hands instinctively crawl to his hips, and you grab ahold of his shirt in your fists, unafraid of creasing his freshly cleaned shirt.

for a moment, the world is quiet.

it’s just you and the warmth of him.

you begin to wonder when silence inevitably abducts you. over and over again, you’re met with the same old uncertainty storming inside of your mind. perhaps your mind is playing games, or jungkook is the one playing games with you. on days jungkook makes you feel like he might just be your prince charming, you’re kicking your blanket like an idiot every night. however, it’s when you think the gap between you and jungkook no longer exists after one thing and another, he finds a way to pry it back open again by reverting to his old self—to the person you never knew.

when you’re looking at him expectedly, he’s never looking back.

when he acts friendly again out of the blue, you’re always searching for answers.

why did he worry when you were sick?

why did he feel accountable for you?

why did he take you to his room and leave you to sleep under his watch?

why did he kiss you that night when you were drunk?

why does he expect you to answer when he was the one behind everything misleading?

why does he try to keep you safe at a red light?

why is he allowed to wrap his arms around you during the times you feel most upset?

why doesn’t he tell you who hayoung is?

why does he look for an answer in you when you asked for his first?

why does he care about you?

why is he making you overthink?

because you adored him so much—as a player and even as a person, you were always blinded to everything jungkook did. 

“are you alright?” jungkook speaks softly into your ear. he’s keeping the noise to the minimum, but he’s also intentional with his tone—just to make you feel like he’s the one to turn to when you’re in need. “you’re never convincing, so is it up to me to get better at reading you?”

why doesn’t he have his arms wrapped around you now?

why are you the only person holding him desperately?

“why?” you finally unleash your thoughts, your head still against jungkook. once upon a time, they were all securely locked for his sake, but now you don’t care if that all shatters. “tell me why you care.” you ask without trying to sound hostile, merely because you want him to discern your earnestness.

jungkook doesn’t say anything.

you tear yourself away from jungkook’s chest and peer up at him in despondency. “or am i misunderstanding?” you echo his words emptily, yet his face keeps still.

“it’s not a misunderstanding.” jungkook then replies solemnly. “i care so much to the point it’s uncomfortable.” 

at this second, there’s nothing in this world that can beat jungkook. he’s standing right here, probably not even thinking about how your body is reacting; your heart squeezes up in desperation for sweeter words. you want to gouge your heart out and show him how many pricks there are—maybe then, he’ll think less and talk more.

“i easily forget about the tournament when you're around.” jungkook, not giving a hell about what you think anymore, harshly pulls your wrist and places your palm onto the left region of his chest. under his skin, you feel each of his thumping heartbeats—it’s rapid every time it contracts; it feels like it’s going to beat out of his chest anytime soon.

yours feels the same, except worse.

he probably doesn’t know that as well.

“when you’re here, i don’t think about the consequences.” jungkook drops his hand, letting you do the work from here onward. he now looks at you with eyes devoid of emotion; which goes against what he just said. perhaps that’s why he’s given you an opportunity to feel rather than see.

you slide your hand off his chest as you turn away. instead, you’re staring at his bed, which only torments you further at the recollection of memories piercing your mind like a bullet. “you really don’t listen to a word i say.” you murmur cryptically. “i thought i told you to stop being vague.” 

“i’d rather kiss you than focus on a game.” jungkook confesses instead. “i’d rather sleep with you than compete.”

“jungkook, that’s—” you interrupt, dreading every one of his confessions. anxiety gushes in when you realise that he was slowly breaking apart too. it’s not your fault—you know it isn’t, but to see jungkook displeased with himself is hurting more than any injury out there. everyone knows that he cherishes his career more than anything.

“i’m sure you can imagine how detrimental it is to the team if a leader can’t set priorities.”

you get it now.

you’ve become jungkook’s mistake.

although you’re not fully certain if jungkook can reciprocate your feelings, there’s one thing you’re sure about: his affection. it grew beyond his control. he didn’t think it would; he didn’t think anything could blur his vision because he always believed in himself. the jungkook you know is collected and confident—in the beginning, you didn’t think he was capable of conveying such romantic emotions.

yet he’s come so far.

from the jungkook who didn’t budge at any of your rants, to the jungkook who constantly finds you to prove that you’re deserving of admiration.

maybe that’s enough for you.

“i have to value you as my teammate more than anything.” jungkook hooks a finger below your chin to raise your head up from your own shadows. you erase the bitter smile that crept up to your lips, but there’s no doubt he saw. “and with the terms and conditions we agreed to, there’s not much ahead for us.”

again, jungkook is too good at this.

“jungkook,” you breathe out thickly. “jeon jungkook.” you call out his name for the first time. his eyes dilate in surprise, and you simply smile at his eyes you seem to be obsessed with.

you can’t help it.

it’s jungkook after all.

“let’s stay apart.” you determine on your own. “we’ll go back a few steps.”

wordlessly, jungkook retracts his hand. “is that easy for you?” he asks after some thought.

no.

not at all.

as if.

“tell me,” jungkook demands an answer. “is it really?”

“someone will have to think about the consequences.”

“if that’s what you want.”

suddenly feeling your eyes dry, you habitually swipe at your eyes with an arm. the moment you pull a part of yourself off of your face, a single drop wells up in the inner corner of your eyes.

huh?

no way.

just before a tear can creep out of your eyes, you clear your throat and quickly peer up at the sky. you use gravity to your advantage to suppress the escape of a single tear. “you better come down for dinner.” you prod casually once you flick your head back down. “i’ll steal yours if you don’t.”

“all yours.”

and just like that, you back away, little by little, until you feel the back of your shoulders hit the door.  you don’t think twice when you twist the handle of jungkook’s door before stepping out of his room. with your back turned against him, you let the door shut loudly behind you.

now you wipe your tears away.

the next afternoon, you dedicate yourself to another day of training with your team. it’s been a while since you stopped struggling in-game; you’re not diving in unnecessarily out of greed anymore, and that alone carried meaningful outcomes. you’ve been top fragging for the last few matches, and namjoon has been screaming in your ear in awe at your improvement.

on the other hand, everything else felt ordinary. the sky was a pale blue, the sun was shining vigorously, and jungkook acted exactly like himself. thanks to him, it was easier for you to stay far behind. because for all you know, you’ve been accustomed to this situation long ago anyway, since he never actually gave you special treatment unless the two of you were privately secluded. 

not a thing in the world is going to notice your dimming relationship with jungkook. you’re the only person that can claim everything that happened between you and him as a fragment made of reality.

“aeum!” seokjin shouts from the kitchen. he’s cutting up some of the vegetables you and jungkook bought that day. “a parcel arrived under your name today with the rest of the fan mails!”

“really?” you ask again; half out of scepticism, the other half out of excitement. ever since the release of you and jungkook’s photos, fanmade letters and gifts have stopped substantially. “where is it?” 

“on the doormat!” 

you run to where the doormat is, and you swiftly retrieve a pink cardboard box the second you see it. your name is handwritten on the top of the box with hearts drawn underneath. the sender’s name isn’t attached, but most of the time, their names are revealed in the letters for confidentiality. 

the tape sealing the box appears resistant, so you rush over to the kitchen to loot a pair of scissors. you pinch seokjin’s scissors to cut precisely along the lines of the box before gaping blankly at the content inside. 

all you see is shredded pink tissue paper filling the box. your logic tells you to reach in since something could be hiding somewhere beneath the bed of shreds. the other option is flipping it the other way around, but there’s a probability that the item could be extremely fragile, hence the overwhelming amount of tissue paper.

or… there could be nothing in it.

that all aside, you put a hand inside the bed of shredded tissue paper in an attempt to grab anything tangible. swivelling your lost hand for a few seconds in the unknown, you’re thinking you might’ve been baited. 

“i thought so.” you snicker. “such effort too.”

your hand feels for anything on each side of the box, and just when you thought you’ve seriously been toyed with, you feel something slit the base of your hand. the burning sensation is enough to force a whimper out of you, but you tighten your lips, adamant to keep the pain hidden.

you promptly pull your hand out, only to confront blood—it’s flowing constantly out of your hand, but not strongly. the heat consumes your fingers before engulfing your palm. from the top of your hand to your forearm, your blood drips down, staining your arm and shirt in no other colour but red. 

you try to find the bleeding source; it’s obvious a blade slashed your palm diagonally. the blade cut you when you tried to hold whatever was inside; you gripped onto it instinctively without any suspicion at all, thinking it might’ve been something more pleasant.

biting down onto your lower lip, you apply pressure with your remaining hand when the blood drops onto the tile. it almost sounding like persistent spits of rain. clearly, your one hand isn’t enough to stop the stream; you’re helplessly leaving a trail of your own blood with every step you take away from seokjin.

who sent this?

an anti-fan?

it’s someone who’s enraged about the news of you and jungkook.

you’ve heard about this before—if “fans” can pour superglue into orange juice and are also fully capable of gifting dead animals; it’s no surprise someone was brave enough to hide a blade to stop you from competing.

“aeum?” 

the terror of watching taehyung’s face lose all colour and turn immobile from shock sucks every breath from your mouth. upon realising that it’s your blood in your own hands, taehyung breaks free to jolt to where you are. his hands stretch out to apply extra pressure onto your wound, and you involuntarily wince at the sharp pain nipping at your separated skin.

“who—” taehyung is seething. he’s losing every whit of sanity; you can tell just by hearing him breathe—it’s becoming more and more shallow with more time passing. his hand is shaking tremendously as you watch your blood stain him too. “what’s going on? you need to explain—” his head snaps in every direction to find a clue on what exactly happened. eventually, his breath hitches when he detects the box sitting at the table. “who sent that?”

“i don’t know,” you answer truthfully. you thought you’d find at least a note in there somewhere. “maybe someone who’s upset?” you try to jest in this situation.

speechless with rage, taehyung tugs on one end of his scarf around his neck, removing it in one swift motion. “i’m taking you to the hospital.” he suggests pensively before tying the scarf around your hand to compress the bleeding. his remaining grip builds up the pressure against your now clothed gash, but at the same time, taehyung’s hands are getting dirtier by the second.

with taehyung’s quivering hand still cupping yours, you put your hand on top of his to calm him down. “taehyung.” you whisper while you squeeze his hand. “we shouldn’t.”

if you get caught with taehyung this time, you really wouldn’t know when you’ll be back on stage.

taehyung finally looks up to meet your eyes. “if this gets infected, you seriously won’t be able to compete.” 

“i’m not saying i’m going to ignore professional treatment, dummy. i don’t want it to be infected either.” you reply honestly. “let’s get namjoon to call someone over.” you tilt your head cheekily, “he restricted me from going out, so i’m going to use it to my advantage when i can.”

“what the—” seokjin’s jaw drops at the sight of you and taehyung fiddling with blood. “what happened? what did i miss?” he fires a bunch of questions. “oh god, who’s blood is that?”

“i was right behind you too.” you glare playfully at seokjin.

“i’m—” seokjin stutters. “i’m going to call namjoon, and we’re going to get you to the hospital—holy shit, what if you need stitches?”

“shut up.” you deadpan unseriously. “can we be optimistic?”

“how do you expect optimism when you’re losing blood?” seokjin argues in growing concern. “i’ll come back with the emergency kit, so you stay right there!” he then spurts up the stairs, making a ruckus in the house. if anyone else is home, it’s only a matter of time until they lose their guts too.

“sorry,” taehyung’s voice comes out soft and glum. perhaps he’s found some composure after covering your wound. “i went a little too overboard, didn’t i?” taehyung sighs, “getting mad and all.”

“you’re kidding me.” you gasp inwardly before crumbling into a faint chuckle. there’s absolutely no reason for him to feel apologetic when he saved you from paranoia. “i was thinking about calling you my saviour from now on, and what? you’re saying you went overboard?”

now taehyung flashes you a smile. “i would’ve preferred myself to be calm for you.” 

“well,” you smack your lips together to make an amused sound. “i’ll gladly accept both sides of you.” taehyung narrows his eyes like he has something in mind, but because you’re you, taehyung is too predictable. “and also your other sides too. maybe i should pick a favourite—”

out of nowhere, you hear a click reverberate from the front door. the sound should be unnoticeable to a person’s ear, but it’s merely because you and taehyung are situated quite close, the two of you catch the noise at the same second. your attention diverts instantaneously—from your injury to the next person who’s bound to witness your messy casualty.

the door opens, and your heart convulses when you watch jungkook enter indoors with a lowered gaze. there’s a piece of paper scrunched in between his balled fingers, and the expression he dons is off. his face is contorted with pure, undiluted anger; his jaw is clenched and his eyes are dull, deprived of life and light. 

did something happen to him?

your curiosity chained you—before you can even think of potential answers to respond to another person about this cursed accident, your eyes are at level with jungkook’s when he turns his head around decisively. the inevitable happens, and you’re caught up in another knot the moment you observe his face darkening more. unlike taehyung, there isn’t a sense of urgency in him, solely disturbance. he glowers at your hand like he knew what he was walking into.

does the piece of paper have to do anything with his reaction?

it must be.

despite jungkook’s appearance, no one in the room comments about his arrival. you’d think taehyung would, but he doesn’t move his mouth.

“i brought the emergency kit—” seokjin reports back to the scene that’s now completely quelled. there isn’t space for seokjin to fit in, and same goes to you—who would even dare to if they’re driven in the middle of fire and ice?

“give it to me, seokjin.” you say quietly, enough to not break the flurrying tension.

“pass it to me.” taehyung intercepts in an antagonistic tone. he grabs ahold of the kit from seokjin before bringing your aching hands closer to him; physically encouraging you to follow his lead.

you can’t help but to hesitate; the idea of simply dismissing jungkook out of spite is unacceptable on your end, but you can’t leave taehyung alone either—not after everything he did for you.

so you just stare back at jungkook, nodding at him to induce him to understand you’re fine (though he never literally asked), but you think this is the best you can do, otherwise you’ll just be walking away from him, seeming like you never want to turn back around.

“taehyung,” jungkook calls out when you and taehyung’s backs ultimately turn against him.

to your surprise, taehyung faces jungkook immediately whilst deadpanning. “what is it?” he answers coldly, holding your hand tight.

“am i not worthy of an explanation?” jungkook walks up to taehyung, automatically drawing him near to you as well. taehyung cocks his brow at him, and you sigh knowingly. “a teammate of ours is injured.” jungkook asserts a fact.

“aeum is injured.” taehyung corrects nonchalantly.

[vampire-pez]

Girl…

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 5]

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, use of toys(sybian), squirting, the long awaited chapter 5 😳💕 do they finally meet?!?!?!?! hehehehehehe also sorry for not being able to post this yesterday, had a busy week and when I tell ya I woke up at 3pm today 😗 💕💕💕💕 as always, thank you so much for your continued interest!! I'm already writing ch 6 and im SOOOO EXCITEDDDD hHEHEHEHEEHEH 💕💕💕💕💕 HAVE A GREAT REST OF YOUR WEEKENDS! 🍒 

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - ? 

“You guys! I--you have to see this!”

You can’t wipe the smile off of your face when you shimmy to the side, excitedly showing off the new gift that Seungcheol had sent in the mail.

sleepy_wonu: holy hell

universe_WZ: that mustve costed hella

alphagyu97: nothin like feelin extra poor amirite lads

angelhan: it was only a matter of time before dom.cheol was untouchable lol 

You giggle slightly as you adjust the camera so that you and your new sybian are in frame. “Hey~ Don’t say that!! Y’know it’s not the amount of money you spend on me… I’m glad you guys are always here with me~” The sound of coins clinking goes off in the back as you read a few more comments.

dom.cheol: well princess, don’t u wanna show them how you use your new toy? ;)

tangerine_kwan: fuck i bet it can get u to cum so fuckin fast

hoshi_tiger_xx: yessss

dom.cheol has donated $100

hoshi_tiger_xx has donated $50

“Hmm~ How many times do you think I can cum with this? Oh! Why don’t we do this~” You pause, sliding your wet panties down your legs before tossing the material to the side. You grin, swinging a leg over the toy until you’re straddling it. “Rapid fire question! Whoever guesses the right amount of orgasms I can take before I call quits… Wins a special unreleased photoset of me! Go!”

dom.cheol: 5

universe_WZ: 4

sleepy_wonu: 6

angelhan: 3 artist8hao: 5

alphagyu97: everyone took all the good numbers already!!! 7!!!!!

gentleman_josh95: DMAN IT 3

tangerine_kwan: 8, fuck

kitty_junjun: ugh i was gonna say 4!!!!

xcaliburDK: i was gonna say 5!!!!

therealchan99: 2? thats so low tho….

chwenon: as if anyone is gonna say 1, lmao. Uh 6…. If sleepy_wonu happens to disappear

hoshi_tiger_xx: im gonna say 10, but… seems… risky

Reaching for the remote, you situate yourself until the raised part of the toy sits directly on your clit. A shiver runs up your spine at the feeling; already excited for what’s in store. “Um, to be fair I haven’t tried it myself yet so I’m not sure either... Hehe, but I guess we’ll find out together, huh?”

Gulping, you set the sybian to its lowest setting, the air getting knocked out of your lungs immediately as your body lurches forward. “H--holy shit!” The vibrations are already harsh on the lowest setting; your fingers gripping the remote tightly as you try to adjust to the feeling. “O--oh my g-god, I--”

dom.cheol: aww can ur cute lil clit take it?

xcaliburDK: maybe one of the lower numbers was right lol…

The moans spill freely from your lips, garbled noises getting lost in the mix when you start to grind against the vibration. “Fuck, it--it feels suh--so good, hah, already feel like ‘m gonna cum…” You whine, already getting lost in the pleasure. For a second, you’re tempted to raise the vibration intensity but you hold back, letting your wetness coat the toy as you continue to grind down onto it. The sound of donations and comments sound fuzzy to your ears; only the sound of the sybian buzzing reminding you that the camera was still even on.

“Ngh, g-god, I’m--I’m gonna cum!”

tangerine_kwan has donated $75

xcaliburDK has donated $50

dom.cheol has donated $200

dom.cheol: cmon, lets see that pretty pussy cum

Your legs shake as you cum, only a squeak coming out of your mouth as you lurch forward atop the toy. The grip you have on the remote loosens while simultaneously trying to turn it off in the midst of your orgasm.

dom.cheol: awww cumming so hard on the first setting? Cute

therealchan99: lol baby is in trouble now

angelhan: maybe 3 was right lmao

“I--a-ah, fu--fuck!” You cry, shaky fingers finally managing to shut the toy off. Your body immediately untenses; chest heaving with how sensitive you already were and it had only been your first orgasm and the lowest setting of the toy. “O-oh my g-god, I--I didn’t know i-it was that s-strong…” You mumble, body buzzing with the remnants of your orgasm.

sleepy_wonu: well mr dom.cheol did pay top dollar

gentleman_josh95: imagine if u had this for yesterdays show lol

“Oh god, if--if I had this for yesterday’s show, I would’ve been too boneless to do today’s show!” You laugh airily, slowly grinding against the toy already. “It feels really nice though… I’m already super curious about how strong the other settings are…” Trailing off, you reach for the remote again, throat dry as you fiddle with the knob.

kitty_junjun: what if u set it to the max setting

chwenon: idk if her cute lil body could take it

dom.cheol: its okay baby, take ur time. I wanna see how sensitive that pussy of yours can get

“But ‘m already so sensitive~ I dunno how much more I can take~” You tease, biting your lip when all the comments flooding the chat are words of encouragement.

You knew when you started camming that it’d be no easy job. Building up your fanbase and subscriber count had taken you months upon months to even get within the thousands and camming was physically exhausting. Some days your viewer counts were low and some days they were above average and sometimes you didn’t make as much in one show than another.

tangerine_kwan: was therealchan99 right with 2 then? Heh

therealchan99: finally FINALLY ITS MY TIME TO SHINE

Giggling, you slowly start turning the knob; body twitching when the vibrations kick in at full force.

Seungcheol watches in amazement at the way your body jerks atop the machine.

He can see the way your legs twitch unbearably when you cum for the third time; your brows furrowed at the intensity of the vibrations and your taut body when you can barely manage to turn the machine off.

Licking his lips, he slowly thrusts up into his closed palm, spreading the precum down his shaft as he watches you catch your breath.

“I--ngh, fuh--fuck, I---I don’t--don’t know if I--I can cum a-again…”

Seungcheol moans at your breathy whimpers; the arousal in his body pooling up quickly when he sees the fucked out expression in your eyes. His eyes flit to the wetness that coats the silicone portion of the toy, smirking when he realizes how much you really seemed to enjoy the gift he’d gotten you.

Mentally patting himself on the back, he praises himself for making the right decision.

angelhan: please tlel me im the winner im begging

universe_WZ: NO

dom.cheol: is the princess tired already? ;)

You catch your breath, not wanting to give up despite how fuzzy your head was getting and how much your body was buzzing. “I dunno… We still haven’t tried the last setting, you guys… And I’m just so curious...” You whisper, hazy eyes staring into the camera.

hoshi_tiger_xx: god u look so pretty like this, all fucked out

artis8hao: right? fuck, id kill to be that guy who can get u off like this

xcaliburDK: goddamn same

The sound of coins clinking mixes with the ringing in your ears; fingertips already on the knob of the remote.

You take a deep breath, letting the adrenaline kick in as you quickly set the knob to the highest setting, a high pitched cry spilling from your lips when you let go of the remote in favor of holding onto the machine instead. Grinding down onto it, you meet the toy's harsh vibrations as it quickly forces another orgasm out of you in the matter of seconds.

Choked cries spill from your lips as your entire body tenses up; body twitching uncontrollably as you cum for the fourth time. You lean back with whatever energy you have left, bracing yourself on the back of the toy as you relieve your swollen clit of the buzzing machine. Your orgasm refuses to stop and you can already tell how obscenely wet everything’s gotten when your head starts to clear.

alphagyu97: fuck you squirted all over the toy baby

universe_WZ: fuck fucki fuck

universe_WZ: wait did i winf kjfhdsjk

You shakily slide off of the machine, resting on your side as the machine still buzzes with life next to you. Your entire body won’t stop shaking, head muddled as you fight the urge to shut your eyes and sleep for the next 5 days. “I’m--I--” You whimper, still feeling the phantom vibrations between your legs.

“I--ho--holy fuck, I, w-wow, I--I don’t--that--I’m, I’m just… wow.”

dom.cheol has donated $400

dom.cheol: knew you’d like it ;)

universe_WZ: THAT MEANS I WON

universe_WZ has donated $150

angelhan has donated $150

therealchan99: well, at least some of us got close

hoshi_tiger_xx: fuckin speak for urself man i said /10/

You end the show after letting ‘universe_WZ’ know you’ll contact him soon, shutting your eyes as you lay on your soiled sheets.

You can still feel your fingertips twitching when your eyes slide shut, chest heaving in deep breaths as you try to relax yourself, momentarily cursing yourself for pushing your body too far for tonight’s show. 

Groaning, you reach for your phone, the screen lighting up with a text from Seungcheol, a simple ‘don’t forget to drink water ;)’ in your notifications and you can’t help but pout.

Seungcheol was nice, almost too nice. Definitely not in a murderer kinda way though, you think. 

He bought you expensive gifts and never asked for anything in return which made you feel bad sometimes. And while the donations and tips you’d made through your camshows was enough to get by with, Seungcheol’s generous donations helped you always make your rent and bills on time without worrying if you’d have enough or not.

You quickly text him back with a smile on your face; hoping that he’ll like what you had to offer.

Seungcheol feels the exact same way he did when you first contacted him offering him a free show, except maybe ten times worse. At first, he’d been a little sad that he hadn’t won your quick little game but this made up for it 20-fold.

The six simple words read ‘want to meet up next friday?’, a small heart emoji next to the question and he’d almost thrown his phone when he read it, hands shakily responding with a simple ‘I’d love to.’ to make it seem like he was calm when he was most definitely not.

His immediate next order of business after replying was to text Namjoon despite how late into the night it already was, begging for the day off and offering to take any shifts or pay cuts in exchange for it. 

All he needed was one day and he swore he’d never miss a day of work ever again.

Namjoon responds with a quick ‘sure, why not’, momentarily confusing him as to why his boss was awake while simultaneously sending Seungcheol into complete panic when he realizes he finally gets to meet you.

The week goes by extremely quickly to Seungcheol; his mood on a completely different level when he offers to pick up Yoongi’s Sunday shift without a complaint. He cleans up all the messes around the roller rink and even offers to do jobs that aren’t his which have Jeongguk raising a brow at the older male.

In the days that lead up to your meeting, Seungcheol looks up a few cafes that you might be interested in and even goes to get an STD exam, not that he’s expecting anything. Safety first, he says.

Your Wednesday show comes and goes, Seungcheol too excited to even get off when he watches you and he even donates an extra $600 at the end of the show; travel spending money, he offers.

And Thursday comes without a hitch and he all but skips to the employee backroom once his shift is over, humming a tune while he changes out of his uniform.

“Hey hyung, no offense, but are you okay?” Jeongguk rests against the locker next to Seungcheol’s open one, brow raised at the blue haired male that beams back at him. “I’m scared, why are you so… giddy. You even offered to take Yoongi-hyung’s weekend shift? What the hell was that about? I’ve never seen him that giddy either.  Man, this place is getting weird, maybe I should quit...”

Seungcheol can’t help but laugh, patting Jeongguk on the shoulder before shutting his locker.

“I have an important meeting tomorrow, that’s all. And don’t quit, ‘cause who else is gonna give me free food.”

While the excitement had him since Saturday, now that it was finally Friday, he was downright nervous.

The two of you had agreed to meet at 2PM in front of the cafe that Seungcheol had picked out and you’d gotten a hotel in town to make it easier on yourself instead of trying to get back to your place too late. Seungcheol had offered to come pick you up, but you had politely declined; instead opting to meet him first before letting him do anything else for you.

And by nature, Seungcheol gets to the cafe 15 minutes early, fidgeting and continuously running his fingers through his hair as he patiently waits. He can feel his palms getting sweaty when he rubs them against his jeans, mentally trying to keep calm and his head floods with all sorts of thoughts; mainly, how he even got into this position with you in the first place. And he gets so distracted that he doesn’t realize you’d be standing watching him zone out for the last 5 minutes.

“Wow, not sure what’s got you so focused but you’re standing so still!”

Seungcheol hears your cute airy laugh that follows, a cherry blush on his cheeks when his eyes meet your smiling face. “I--oh my god…” He whispers, taking in your appearance.

He feels his face buzzing, fingers twitching when he sees you in a cute simple  sundress. “W-wow, you--you’re just… so beautiful. I mean, you’re beautiful on cam too but just, wow, in person? Incredible.” The blush reaches his ears when he realizes he’s rambling, a nervous laugh spilling out of his lips.

“S--sorry, I, uh, usually I’m more chill than this but y’know…” He trails off, to which you nod. You step closer to Seungcheol and he gets a hint of your sweet smelling perfume, mentally groaning when your cute eyes peer up into his.

“That’s okay! I totally understand~ I’m kinda nervous myself too, to be honest…” You pause, a pink blush coating your own cheeks. “But let’s talk over some food, huh?”

Seungcheol doesn’t want to pry, but he’s not sure if he should address you as ‘Cherry’ in person, or if he should avoid calling you by anything at all.

He watches as you go through the cafe’s menu, biting the inside of his cheek as he itches to ask.

“‘Cheol… I can feel you staring, y’know.. Penny for your thoughts?” You ask, concerned eyes meeting his nervous ones.

“I just-- Sorry, I didn’t mean to be awkward, I just was wondering how I should address you in person? I don’t want to overstep my bounds, I know you don’t put your real name out there so…”

You place your menu down, closing it before leaning on your palms atop the small table. Seungcheol is cute, too cute, you think. You knew this would be a question when the two of you eventually met and you had given yourself the time to get used to the idea that he’d know your real name.

He eyes hyperfocus on your glossy lips, watching as you say your name for him for the first time.

Seungcheol’s heart threatens to beat out of his chest when he hears it; repeating it over and over in his head before he says it out loud.

“Wow, it sounds nice when it’s you saying it~” You tease, leaning back in your chair. “I don’t mind if you call me by my name, by the way! The pet names are cute but maybe we should keep that to the bedroom~” You end in a whisper, winking at the male.

Fuck, he thinks, just as his cock throbs at your comment. He really wishes you wouldn’t say things like that because he’s weak and he knows it, especially when it comes to you. “Okay, cool! Yeah, sorry, I just---I didn’t want to overstep, I know you don’t really let that be public information.”

“Of course! And thank you, I really can’t tell you how much you’ve done for me. I really… really wouldn’t be able to do all the things that I do if it weren’t for your constant support.”

You want to say more, but the waiter comes to take your orders, cutting you off until he leaves again.

“By the way…” Seungcheol looks at you with curious eyes, lips puckered around his drink straw. “Tell me about yourself, ‘Cheollie! I feel like we didn’t really get to talk that one time!”

He swallows the water in his mouth, licking his dry lips. Here goes nothing, he thinks.

“I swear, and please don’t think I’m a loser, but I--I work at a roller rink. It’s really not cool, I’m not some high paid CEO or whatever, I--I just, I work hard?” Seungcheol chuckles, running a hand through his hair as he waits for your reply.

“Wait, that’s so cool! Oh my gosh, I kinda wanna go!”

The surprise washes over Seungcheol, eyes wide as saucers when he hears you saying you’d want to visit his workplace. “Wuh---wait, seriously!?”

“Yeah! It’s kinda, like, retro! I haven’t been to one since I was a kid!” He quickly offers to bring you to the roller rink on Sunday so you could have somewhere to hang out while you were in town.

“And sadly, I took a shift on Sunday so you can hang with me while I work.” 

Seungcheol grins, watching as you jokingly roll your eyes at him. “So you did it on purpose, huh…” The two of you share a laugh, glad that your first meeting seemed to be going okay so far.

“Well, I mean, if it makes you feel any better, my best friend works the concession stand so I’ll make sure to get you a free pair of skates and food whenever you want?”

“It’s a deal!”

The two of you continue to talk over your late lunch, Seungcheol telling you of the various work hijinks he’d gone through at his time working at the roller rink.

“Which, by the way, that morning show you did… Hope you know I holed up in the restroom for an entire hour for that ‘lil stunt.”

You can’t help the tears that fall from your eyes when you laugh, only feeling slightly bad for the blue haired male. “But I told you! Sometimes it’s just like that, y’know~” You tease back, heart blooming at the way you and Seungcheol got along.

In all honesty, there’d been something on your mind since you first sat down and you didn’t know when the right time to ask was, or if it was even appropriate.

The smile slips from your face as you bite the inside of your cheek in thought.

Seungcheol takes the bill from the waiter, slipping his card into the holder before you can even offer. But he notices the way your expression falls, noting the hesitance in your eyes when he looks at you from across the table.

“Are you okay? What’s wrong?” His voice is gentle, soft and caring when he leans over the table to make sure you’re alright.

“Yeah! Just---Can I ask you for a favor?”

[anestheticrage]

Be me: Japanese honor student🎓, 15, with half a brain and even less of a plan. Hunting bitches by day and witches by night. Livin that dank only child✌️ life while mom n dad yeet all over the globe, leavin me plenty of time to forget not to make 2 lunches for myself #quirky 😜

no time for socialization or basic electronics skills ???📱??? when your best friends are an alien demon rabbit🐰👽 and the inexplicable Hole ™ in your brain. lmao, btw did i mention im ✨M✨A✨G✨I✨C✨A✨L✨

dreamin bout my 2D waifus again when familiar pink haired cancer patient dances through my brain passin out fliers: Kamihama Meguca Dating Service: Sponsored by Cult of the Magius. 250 stones per session 🤔

seems legit, Mr. Moneybags. wasn't spending my unwieldy sack of gemstones on anything else anyway. lets pull 💎💎💎

first up we have Redhead Radagast and her plethora of plants. 🌿☺️🦎

anndd, nearly dies immediately. 

well not off to a great start but i guess shes pretty cute at lea- oh FUCK its her girlfriend, Tsundere Poseidon😒🔱💦, and their exasperated, straight and single Sword Mom 😔🗡️🔥. fml gonna have to save up for the next pull. might as well play a few rounds with what i got tho. 

get in some good girl talk about things like school, color coded hair styles, body count, permanent soul damage, and our personal demon pacts. ya know, the usual 😚 . realize my dark backstory seems to be missing, so the girls take me to Ketchup Queen Sappho 🍅🥧 (wtf?) to molest my glowy egg stone. whatevs, more action than ive had since Kuroe 🖤 got added to the story anyway

the gang agrees it's time to hunt down the cutest rabbit pimp 🕶️🐇💵 in the city. >> say 🎵mukyuuu🎵 one more time and ill hug you so hard my backstory will pop right out, you adorable fluffy bastard. plz be my new best friend 💕

Form brand new friendship pact with Kyubae, and remember that my lil Sis 🐥 was always the best wingman for pickin up magic chicks, and kept her side of the room so spotless i forgot she existed. whoops 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ Maybe if I find her i can stop paying these exorbitant pull fees.📵💎

speaking of which: hot damn this week's featured bachelorette is a 19 year old model and magical detective🔎 with massive levels of PTSD and self loathing 🥵💙💦 more likely to stab you or dramatically jump off a rooftoop than utter a single positive comment. wow, maybe i really COULD find true love…

... if i had MORE THAN A 1% FUCKING DRAW CHANCE. 😡 smh

hard to make much progress finding sis or winning the broken heart of a hard boiled detective amidst the never ending lover's quarrel of the Trident Vine Lesbians. 💔 Sword Mom tells them if they don't behave a monster will take them away. LOL classic mom 🤣

>>>HOLY FUCK IT DID

declare all-out war on urban legends, starting with staircases ⚔️ to reunite the dysfunctional trio, and hope that I net a way better lineup with the next 10x pull. at least sad sleuth lady came to help out. they say combat is the best way to bond wi-   and there she goes off the rooftop again 🙄 fml

alright that got way off track, we need a fresh start, away from all the loli drama. how bout a little B&E🔓🔨🤷🏻‍♀️ at the local house of worship to clear my head. ahh nothing like the unanswered prayers of the masses to get you in the mood for another wasted pull, and the 🔥 MIGHTIEST 🔥 headache you could ask for with a side of Double Cooked Pork 🐖🍜 (meh 5/10🧾)

venture forth into the spiritual unknown with your new human flamethrower🔥🌻🧡 and ask your favorite private eye to please, for the love of Eve, trade Meguca accounts with me~~~ Head through the eastern spirit portal to meet up with hologram propaganda sis and detective crush's evil ex, who joined a dating-app cult (#fuck) and also turned into the moon?🌕?(that's rough buddy)

get ambushed by Acid Horse on Wheels 🌈🐴 and vomit up my soul so hard that its time for a crossover episode. T U R F F F   W A R R R *que operatic harmonies* 💛 Blondie with the hair drills and enough attitude and guns to fill up a noble phantasm tries to ban my account permanently, but PI heartthrob denies her admin privileges. aww babe i didn't know you cared. 😭♥️

get kidnapped by my new true love and go back to her place 😏  defs enough empty rooms to house five emotionally traumatized girls and at least two ghosts hehehe👻 XD 💚🃏💜🎸 decide to form the anti-gossip brigade and recruit my blazing sunflower after getting ambushed by the witch living in my fruit loops🥣

❌outvoted 2:1 that cults are bad. mf. fiinneee one last pull to round out the team and then I'll delete the app. cmonnn Karin 🎃~

OH HELL YEAH TWO FOR ONE.

Always wanted a daughter 💜🔨🐄 with a penchant for pissing off the local Martial Arts & Books Club and drinking suspicious liquids offered by total strangers. Well if it's good enough for her AND the sexy mayadere with enough game to seduce a mermaid, might as well get in on that myself. 

#curseddrank 🤢 0/24 would not recommend to a friend, 'cept maybe Ria

win alot of cash 🤑, blow up a fountain, meet the pied piper²🎶🖕, moon cult, monochrome feathers, something about liberation✊🏻; adopt temper tantrum cow girl. aces 💜🥩

Next up!!! skydiving with DJ Hammer! Jump to apparently-not-certain death after suicidal A.I. 💚💾🗼 tells you to rescue her hostage before they run out of Radiohead albums and have to move on to Thom Yorke's solo discography. save the invisible shield kitten 💚👑😿 from happiness and get chased through the internet by the sexiest homicidal Paint Pallette 💚🎨😈 since Caravaggio. (apparently green is the color of the digital apocalypse. i’m deleting Kako from my friend's list)

that’s it, fuck this app. 250 stones 💎 per-life-threatening-experience is more than i’m willing to deal with 😓 don’t wanna mess with the perfect nuclear family anyway. we've already got: 

✔️the two emotionally traumatized moms with memory and commitment issues

✔️the adhd daughter with anger management problems and a giant hammer

✔️the psychologically abused scizophrenic cat

✔️and the eccentric aunt with crippling anxiety

#squadgoals

now that were done hoarding bitches, its time to hunt the witches. and the bitches makin the witches. btw did i mention the witches ARE the bitches! AND WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!? 📽️⁉️💀 wait fuck lets back up a second

This is Nemo📕 and Token🧪 and they have all the answers but prefer if you only ask vague questions in exchange for vague responses so they can fill in the rest by discussing their superior intellect 🧠 at length. not to mention they built that dating app, so of course everyone in my harem decides to be a FUCKING. TRAITOR.🤬

cept waifu prime ofc 🥰💙. [PTSD > brainwashing] 'yOu CaN bE tHe LeAdEr NoW'. i have been from the very beginning you traumatized Hinedere nightmare. maybe if you weren't so caught up collecting surrogate daughters you would've noticed IM👏THE👏ONLY👏 ONE👏PROGRESSING👏THE FUCKING👏PLOT✨

rescue the rest of dysfunctional found-family™ from selves before my adorable firebender burns down Disnihama🎡🔥😱 during her weekly anxiety attack. (love the makeover T B H) 

CHAPTER 8: Magical Girl Massacre🩸🗡️

   - everyone has like, the shittiest day ever

   - the new Pope really needs to be extradited from the church

   - make friends with a really pretty tree 🌺🌲✨

i swear, if i don't finish this god damn story in time to get that free pull im gonna beat the shit out of every mirror i find in that giant mansion that i haven't even had any time to even mention yet. 🖕🏚️ let alone EVERYTHING happening with the prequel [fuck you, I'm the star] girls 💗💜💙💛❤️️ and their multidimensional melodrama. We don't need that many repetitive af episodes to emphasize that Homo-ra is a shitty person. we've all seen Rebellion. 🙄

NO, I DONT CARE IF YOU WANT SAPPHO'S BACKSTORY, I ONLY HAVE 79 STONES LEFT AND IF YACHAN FINDS OUT I HAVEN'T DELETED THE APP YET IM GONNA HAVE TO GO SLEEP IN WITH SANA 😭💎💸😠

uhhhggggg where were we… Topple a cult and burn down Hotel Denoument only to realize that Sis was fused with the dating app servers this entire madokafuckin time (told ya she was the best wingman 😊). 

Dilemma: Sis =🥚, Triumvirate of Trouble want 🐣. What do? vote now:

Help Hatch - IIIIIII

Not Do That - IIIII

What The Actual Fuck Is Going On - IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Lets just fight everyone until something good happens.

🔥🔫🔥🗡️🔥😱🔥🌆🔥😱🔥🛡️🔥💣🔥

Kill (???) the artist-in-chief of the italian reindeer murder police after teaching her the true meaning of Christmas 🎄 hatch 🐣lil Sis and realize she WAS your wingman all along🐰 MUKYUUUU! we're just gonna ignore how much trouble it would have saved if you'd just mentioned that. "yOu DiDnT aSk..." 

FUCK YOU SPACE BITCH. ONCE AN INCUBATOR ALWAYS AN INCUBATOR 🖕���🔪

anywho, somewhere along the lines we of course summoned the Antichrist ⚙️ because why not raise the stakes to max and still not kill off a single character. Madofuckinkami, can we PLEASE wrap this up. 😩💤

feathers (not the culty kind, tfm) rain from the sky, and the power of friendship and not having the Urobutcher 🔪🩸as a lead writer saves our peacefully sectioned off alternate reality 😇

TL:DR fuck cults, real life waifus DO exist, don't sell your soul to space rabbits, or your stones to megacorporations. Enjoy arc 2 on the JP server with your shitty translation patch you filthy fuckin weebs 

Yours Truly, 

- Thirsty Weeb Eroha 💗💎😘 

[reidmeup]

pros about teenage bounty hunters:

nice sister dynamics, they fight, they make up, they do crazy shit together and then blame the other -- peak sis shit

Nice(ish?) adults!!!!! outside!!! family!!!! people say it’s found family? good shit [look i’m saying nice not responsible thats a whole other shit]

girls being H O R N Y -- an revolutionary concept. it’s not just fuckin’ boys we wanna have sEX TOO GODDAMMIT

satire of religious family, education and friends

depiction of black people in position of power and a quite cute interracial couple until the tenth episode sent that to shit

the beefy dude being a quite nice and domestic dude despite bowser dislike for him? yes

bisexual awakening and wlw relationship! let me say this again BISEXUAL AWAKENING AND WLW RELATIONSHIP!!!!!

EXCITED teacher! supportive TEACHER! ngl i had a blast with her being all “you can do it!!! i trust you!!!”

teenager DRAMAAAAA it made me laugh ngl

masturbation discourse!!!!!

first times being with people you love <3 (and with protection!)

secure and badass women characters with reasonable depth to their characters (could it be better? yes. but hey, it could also be so much worse)

a lot of good christian/religious things for young people to see such as god doesn’t hating you for having sex or loving same-sex people; be a good person; not letting other people be slandered by your actions (ngl what sterling did for her alleged enemy then??? exemplary) and things like don’t smoke/don’t do drugs (tho this is not religious, but yk idk)

the cons:

another show with white protags only this time they’re even RICHER than normal

i’m talking upper class ‘i own idk how many cars and i go to one of these fancy white clubs where i golf and shoot targets and look down on other people’ rich

LOTS OF WHITE PEOPLES PROBLEMS LIKE HOLY FUCK SO MANY WHITE PEOPLES PROBLEMS AND EVEN WORSE--- WHITE TEENS PROBLEMS AT THAT

the beginning of blair and miles relationship was cringy ngl here;

religious family education, family and friends; what did u expect? it’s kinda a two way street

bit of queer-baiting and black-baiting ngl here

uhhh... lots of guns? talk? and use? and parading ‘em around like they’re nothing? idk man it’s also atlanta i’m sure its kinda normal shit

unfortunately none of the white supremacists with the feds flag got punched on the nose as they should

idk i’m sure there was lot more but i’m tired already

in the end? binge-worthy go see it and scream to me on my inbox

[therainroguefanfiction]

🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 046 [Family]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,486

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

〈“The tallest mountain started as a stone. I once was weak, but now I’ve grown. Hero! I know, the weakness within is my greatest foe!” Jonathan Young, “Hero (One Punch Man Cover)”〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

I followed Naomasa from the room toward the front of the police station where two men were standing off to the side of the front desk, talking quietly amongst each other. The one on the right is pretty tall and broad, similar to flame fuck but a few inches smaller. He wore armor the color of pickles with orange and grey accents. Short, messy platinum blonde hair covered his head.

The second man is thin and only a few inches shorter than myself. He was wearing a deep grey suit with a pin-stripe vest over a white shirt and orange tie. His hair is several inches longer than the first guy’s, a rich navy blue with the tips a frosted orange.

They turned around to face us when we approached, their lime green eyes widening. Naomasa cleared his throat, “I was told that you’re here to pick up Miss Winchester, but -” His words were cut short when the larger of the men rushed forward, throwing his arms around me and crushing my body to his, my feet dangling above the ground.

I wiggled in his grip, the pain in my arm starting to seep through the pain pills they had given me. “Let go of me, you fucking ape!”

His brow furrowed as he looked down at me. “Who taught you such language?”

The smaller of the two sighed, his fingers brushing against the orange tips hanging over his forehead. “Pops, you can’t just go around hugging people you’ve just met, they’ll think you’re an absolute eejit. Let her down,”

He hesitated, his lips curling down into a frown before he finally set me down. The second his arms released me, I curled my right hand into a fist and punched him in the side – there was a small opening not covered by the armor. He stepped back with a wheeze, “Deadly! Even without using your quirk, you’re quite strong!”

“Winchester,” Naomasa sent me a warning look.

“What?” I spat, clutching my shoulder. “If he had been a villain, I woulda been dead! For a detective, your reflexes are shit. Besides, I’m still fucking recovering and now my goddamn shoulder is throbbing!”

“Please don’t scold her,” The smaller held his hand up with an exasperated look. “He deserved it.”

“Damn fucking right he did.”

“Sorry about him,” he smiled softly. “He can get a bit excitable sometimes. Would we be able to talk someone a bit more… private?”

“Fuck no,” I deadpanned. “I ain’t goin’ nowhere with you fucks. I don’t know who you are or what you want, but I’m tired, in pain, and have no fucks to give you.”

Worry flashed through the big man’s eyes. “You’re in pain? We need to get you to a healer!” He tried to grab my hand but Naomasa stepped between us. ‘Bout fucking time he did something.

“Would you care to explain why the number five hero of Ireland knows a first-year student from Japan?”

“I’m her oul fella!” The man huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Her… what?” Naomasa sent me a confused look and I just shrugged. Fuck if I know.

The front doors to the department slid open and Toshi’s muscled form came rushing in, his blue eyes filled with worry as they scanned the room. Once he found us, he speed-walked over, throwing his arms around me in a gentle embrace that didn’t add any more pain to my body. “Young Jen! I’m so glad you’re okay! Tsukauchi called me and told the gist of what happened!”

I patted his back with my good arm, my voice softening. “Sorry for worrying you, Tosh.”

He pulled away from the hug only to squish my face between his large hands. “You have a lot of explaining to do when we get home!”

“I ant luki,” I muttered, my words smooshed together like my fucking face is.

“Hm?”

I smacked his hands away, rubbing my cheek. “I said, ‘I ain’t Lucy’.”

“Who is Lucy?” He tilted his head in confusion.

“You uncultured swine -”

“All Might? It’s been donkey’s years since I last saw ya!” The large man grinned, holding his arms out.

“Luck!” Toshi returned the grin, the two men embracing one another. “Why didn’t you tell me you had arrived in Japan? When did you get here?”

“Just yesterday! I wanted to surprise ya!”

“You two know each other?” Naomasa questioned, raising a brow.

“He’s an old friend of mine,” Toshi explained, clapping the man, Luck, on the shoulder. “Why? Is something wrong?”

“He’s weird as fuck,” I deadpanned from behind the detective. “And why the fuck is your beard brown but the rest of your hair is platinum? It looks stupid.”

The smaller of the two quickly covered his mouth, shoulders shaking as he laughed. “I told you, pops.”

“It’s a fashion statement!” He cried. “And I’m not weird!”

Toshi laughed loudly. “He’s pretty eccentric, that’s for sure! Tsukauchi, is young Jen free to go?”

“Yes. If we have any more questions, we’ll be in touch.” He smiled at me, resting his gloved hand on my head. “Try to stay out of trouble, okay? You did well, Winchester.”

I clicked my tongue before offering him a grin. “I’ve always prided myself on being good at being kidnapped.”

He chuckled.

“Wait, you were kidnapped?” The second boy looked at me with worry before exchanging a look with Luck.

“Yeah, it was one hell of a time,” I responded blankly.

Toshi cleared his throat. “Luck, can you bring us back to U.A.?”

“I can,” Luck held out his hands. The boy took his left while Toshi took his right before holding the other out to me.

“Take my hand, young Jen.”

Raising a brow, I slid my hand into his, feeling a familiar sensation overcome my senses, but it was gone as quick as it came. I blinked dumbly. Oh… we’re standing just outside the U.A. gate. This guy can teleport? Or is it something different?

Toshi led us into the school and to one of the lounges he often used when he needed to talk to me and Zuku in private. The two men sat on one side, while me and Toshi took the other. Both couches were a faded chocolate brown that squeaked whenever one of us moved.

“I’m sure you must be quite confused,” Toshi commented, glancing at me.

“That’s the fucking understatement of the century,” I rolled my eyes.

The second boy shifted, folding one leg over the other as he smiled softly at me. “Perhaps we should start with some introductions, hm? My name is Ryan O’Connor.”

“Right, right!” Luck grinned. “I’m the Lucky Hero: Luck! Also known as Felix Kevin O’Connor, but you can call me Kevin. Or Felix. Or Luck. Or -”

“Or eejit,” Ryan rolled his eyes.

I grunted. “Jen Winchester.”

Luck leaned forward and reached his hand across the table but hesitated before pulling it back to his lap. “You’re so beautiful. Just like your oul dear.”

“My deer?” I raised a brow, looking at Toshi.

“Oul dear,” Ryan corrected with a chuckle. “Your mum.”

My eye twitched. “Everyone seriously fuckin’ knows her, don’t they?”

“Well, you see…” Toshi rubbed the back of his head. “When you were… conceived, there were two possible fathers in the picture. One of those men… was Luck.”

“I found out about you about two months after you disappeared,” Luck explained with a sad smile.

“I was reluctant to inform him when we… found you, since I couldn’t be sure that he was your father. You were already processing so much information at the time, you see.”

“So what changed, then?” I asked, leaning back against the couch and looking up at the ceiling.

“Your teleportation ability.”

“You inherited my quirk!” Luck exclaimed proudly. “Well, one of them anyway.”

“You also have two?”

“That’s right! My main quirk is called ‘Luck’, which makes me super lucky! It’s not perfect, though, and it can fail me on occasion, but I make up for it with my teleportation!”

Hmm, are double quirks a genetic thing? “So~… you’re my father, huh?”

“I am,” Luck nodded vigorously, his eyes shining.

“And I’m your half-brother,” Ryan smiled, tilting his head to the side.

“How old are you?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at him. “And your quirk, what is it?”

“I just turned fifteen a month ago, so you’re my big sis. And my quirk is called ‘bat’. It’s not very impressive, but…” His body started to shrink and shift until a small bat replaced where he had been sitting a moment ago, a miniature suit on its body. He flapped his wings, gliding over to hover in front of me.

Holy. Fucking. Satan’s. Asscrack. It’s the most adorable fucking thing I’ve ever seen in my life! He squeaked in surprise when I grabbed him, holding him to my chest. “So fucking cute!”

Luck laughed loudly, slapping his knee. “Most girls are afraid of ’em in that form!”

“Because most girls are fucking stupid.” I scowled, my fingers gently rubbing his head. “So what does all of this mean, exactly?”

The two men exchanged a look before Luck spoke up. “I don’t expect you to suddenly start calling me your oul fella or to return to Ireland with us, but I would like to build a relationship with you. I think ‘Lis woulda liked that for us… so, I’ve decided! We’re moving to Japan, Ryan, my boy!”

Ryan let out a squeak of surprise before his body started to shift and expand in my arms. “Don’t be thick, pops! You can’t just abandon your duties back home, there are people counting on you.”

He laughed again, waving his hand. “Don’t worry! I already made the arrangements before we left Dublin. Sean will be finishing up the last of our cases before transferring over here.”

I scoffed. “What about your son, bro? At least give him the fucking option to keep his life back home.”

“Oh, I’m not worried about me, but thank you -” His voice went a pitch higher when he turned his head to me, his cheeks going a bright red.

I cocked a brow in confusion. “Uh, you good or?”

He cleared his throat, bangs covering his eyes as he quickly transformed again, slipping through my arms and settling on the couch beside his dad who was currently laughing his ass off. “You shoulda seen your face just now, you were scarlet!”

Ryan settled down on the couch, taking human form once again and huffing, turning his face away from us.

“Don’t mind him,” Luck slapped the boy’s shoulder roughly. “He’s never been close to any girl, ‘cept for his oul dear before!”

“Shut your gob,” he muttered, covering his face with his hand. “Do you really think it’s such a good idea to leave Sean in charge? Last time you did so, we ended up owing the Dublin P.D. eighteen-hundred euro.”

“Hahaha! I remember that, good times!”

“You only say that because I’m the one that dealt with it,” he scowled.

“And ya did a fierce job, as always!”

“Have you found a place to stay already?” Toshi questioned. “Young Jen is still staying with Aizawa, so I have some space in my apartment.”

“Aizawa?” Ryan inquired, tilting his head to the side.

“You are far too young for a boyfriend, young lady!” Luck slammed his hand on the table, looking far too upset for the current situation.

“Hah?” My eyes narrowed at him. “I don’t need your fucking permission to date someone.”

“Now, now, everyone calm down.” Toshi held his hands up, smiling brightly. “Aizawa is a teacher here at U.A. and -”

“Go away out of that,” Luck smacked his knee with his hand. “Surely it’s not allowed for a teacher to date a student!”

“Well, no, but -”

“I’ll date whoever the fuck I want, old man,” I growled, slamming my hand on the table and meeting his gaze. “Don’t think that just because you fucked my mom once upon a time, you can just appear and start controlling my life, because that ain’t about to fucking happen!”

The air was tense around us and I expected him to get angry and yell back at me, but he didn’t. Instead, he smiled softly, his large hand reaching out to ruffle my hair. “You’ve grown up to be so strong, darlin’. I’m glad.”

“I, uhh,” I scratched my cheek, sitting back down. “Thanks…”

Ryan cleared his throat, “Dating or not, it’s a bit inappropriate, no?”

“Zawa was injured protecting his students,” I responded, narrowing my eyes at him. “So I decided to stay with him until he fully recovers from those injuries. He’s family, after all.”

Luck ruffled the boy’s hair with a laugh. “Sorry, sorry. It’s just… we’re a bit overprotective when it comes to our own. And to answer your question, All Might – I’ve found a nice house on the other side of town, but the papers are still being put in order. Should only be a day or two longer.”

“Well, old friend, you’re welcome to stay with me until then!” Toshi glanced at the clock and coughed into his hand. I glanced at him. He’s pushing himself to be in this form, the fucking idiot.

Recognition flashed through Luck’s green eyes. “Much appreciated friend, but don’t worry ’bout us. It’s getting late, boyo, let’s go find us a nice hotel!”

Ryan hummed, sending me a soft smile as he stood up. “It was nice meeting you, sis. I hope we can form a closer bond in the future.”

My lips twitched up. “Yeah… I’m sure we will.” The two of them left the room, the door sliding closed behind them. Toshi let out a breath, his muscle form popping. “He knows about you don’t he?”

Toshi coughed a couple of times, blood splattering against his fist. “He’s seen this form and knows I have a limit, but he doesn’t know the details behind it. His son has no idea.” I hummed thoughtfully and he patted my knee. “You should head home and get some rest. I’ll call Tsukauchi and get the story from him.”

“Sure,” I stood up and headed toward the door, my hand hovering over the handle. “Hey, Tosh?”

“Yes?”

“You said there were two possible fathers… who was the second guy?”

He was silent for a couple of minutes and when he finally spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper. “I don’t think you want to know…”

I raised a brow. “Come on, it can’t be that bad. Wait… it’s not some fucker with a clown quirk, is it? ‘Cause those fucks are creepy as hell. Shit, what if it’s a spider quirk?! Oh hell nah!”

“No…” he took a deep breath before moving his eyes up to meet mine. “The other man she was seeing… it was Endeavor.”

“Holy fucking Deadpool choking on a chimichanga…”

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

▸ Forward

📜 Read more by checking out my masterlist 📜

[og-doubletrouble-kinnie]

SPOP Season 4 notes

Spoilers obvi

Gonna be a bit different from my s3 notes, as I’m p much just gonna liveblog stuff here- Since I dont wanna spoil my friends... Rip 😔

Ep 1:

Mom: Icecream cake :-D me, sobbing: Mom I love you

Every time my mom does something I cry. I love and miss her sm

YALL JUST HURTIN PERFUMA LIKE THIS-

WHY CAN THE SWORD BE A MOP-

Ya know I always thought Hordaks red teeth were fuckin weird af

GRANDMA GRANDMA GRANDMA GRANDMA

GO GET MY GIRLFRIEND YOU UGLY KITTY

EMILYYYYYYYYY AWAAAA

They really out here just reusing the princess prom outfits huh?

Really though I swear if Entrapta doesnt come back I’ll scream. You cant just trade in my beautiful amasing gf for me. I know I’m great but I swear.

Rip Auntie Angella.... 😔

I wasn’t even there for the corrination- I kinda feel bad for that but... I was alittle busy... With somethin- Hell if I know what.

HELL YEAH QUEEN GLIMMERRR

Oh hot diggity Catra-

Look I may not like her but I can really respect her tactics....

EP 2:

Okay what does Perfuma have against the crimson wastes- Hopefully its (Rightful) fear!

Oh nooo the gooooo

One does not simply call Adora soft

Aweeee Perfuma and Bow bonding...

Perfuma is cacti-phobic hahahaha

O.O Wheres the ship

Huntara eats sand and theres nothing you can do about it.

OOOO NEW TOWN NEW TOWN NEW TOWN

MEMEMEMEMEMMEMEMEMEMMEMEMEMEMMEMEMEMEME

AH YES MY FIRST WORDS ARE BEING SCORPIA AND FLIRTING WITH CATRA. HOW FITTING.

God im so dramatic I love it

Perfuma Im so proud of you bb

Hot take? Perfuma x Huntara

AWEEE IM SO HAPPYYYYYYYY

Honestly being Catra was always fun

Ep 3:

Pajamas Catra? Catra without her headband? Wild shit. Wild shit.

She cute tho ngl

Oh hecc its time to fuck with the rebels-

I s2g its rly lookin like my tl may just be flip flopped on which side I helped- Idk... its only ep 3 jfkbgf

Wittle moth society... so cute...

Flutterina... Adorable

SHE RA CAKE

The moth town leader is adorable. Precious old lady. I love her. her design is amazing. 10/10 I love her

Wait what-

Ohhhh my god what happened-

Catra if you dont start appreciating Scorpia right this second I swear to god I will appreciate her myself.

Flutterina is so precious. All her fangirling...

Are we gonna explorer the whole.. reaction catra has every time someone mentions the Portal??

MAGICAL SACRED BOND TIME

FLUTTERINA IS A PRECIOUS BABY AND I LOVE HERRR

SCORPIAAAA SIS GET OVER HERE LEMME HUG UUUU

Oh....

OH

O H

OKAY

I AM ON BOARD WITH THIS

Ep.4

Spinerella and nettossa are precious 100%

Okay but I’m right. tiny cute and pink. I didnt even catch it. I done fooled myself.

Am cutie

GRANDMAS BA C K BOIISSSSS

god I love shadow weaver. I miss her sm

B O BB N O

OKAY SPOT ON BO IMPRESSION!

IM SO CUUUTTTEEE

Yaaayyyyy Catras having fun!

WEAVER LIKES DAISIES. PRECIOUS. AWA. GWANDMAAAA

She makes great bait and u know it.

Oh no are the gfs fighting-

Catra legit thought glimmer was me I love this-

CATRA WHY DO YOU KNOW WHAT GLITTER TASTES LIKE-

..... Okay literally as I type thet I get mems of her eating glitter okay cool

Ohhh That was cool-

Hey Catra dont hide your grateful attitude you dick

God I love these girlfriends

LET WEAVER BE GOOD ADORA

This is cute

Ep 5

Kyle you precious little boy

Oh are they finally gonna develop these three?

Ditzy light hope is cute light hope

SHES ALL SMILEYYYY

I love Kyle launie and roheleo... Precious

“I made a crystal :-D”

“I know what will help!” “no dont-”

Kyle I love you

“Oh trust me the information is never gonna load for you.”

Lookit these... three siblings.... Blessed babes

COMPUTER MOM HAS EMOTIONS

AWA

KYLE BABY NOOO

HARD SQUINTING AT LIGHT HOPE

EP 6

Oh boi Scoria episode here we go

God I love that she kept Emily....

Scorpia is too bright and cheery for the hoarde. Redeem her damnit

Hecc I hate that Im being so mean to the best friend squad but oooog its so fun to watch

Emily’s personality is so cuuuteee -w-

Emily scared of Catra.. precious

SCORPIA YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER-

I wanna hug her so bad

Hehehehehehe >:)

Damnit Bo, ruining my work-

CRYING

Scorpias entrapta impression tho

SCORPIA YOU TOUCH THAT GARNET GOD DAMNIT

Im gonna cry, emilys recordings....

GOD I LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND-

..... Whats goin on with the Garnet...

LET GLIMMER BE DARK

THE GREATEST HUGS, SCORPIA. GREATEST HUGS

Emily youre so smart.

SCORPIA FINALLY KNOWIN SHES WORTH BETTER HELL YEAH YOU GO SISTER

Catra rly needs a hug tbh

OHHHH HELL YESSSSSS

God I wanna know more about the scorpion kingdom....

Ep 7

Mermista you are too happy when holding everyone in a room against their will

OH OKAY THAT WOULD EXPLAIN WHY

SPOILERS MERMISTA

Ohhh hohoho I am lovin this story~

Shadow weaver bein an embarassing mom to Adora, adorable

Adora was absolutely suspicious of Weaver in my tl 100% Sure I made her more trusted, but Adora is stubborn

BFDJKGBFJKD ENTRAPTAS HELPERS ARE IN THE CASTLE

Ooooooo This is a great ep...

Ohh Im having fun arent I~

Ohhhhhhh Shiiiiiiiiiiit Rip selenious

Ep8

I hope yallre keepin an eye on me, Or I’ll get out >:-)

Awee depressed baby :-(

SHANTYYYY

OH THIS IS PRECIOUS

Seahawk this is a terrible idea....

This better be a musical episode

BDHJFBD WRONG KIDNAPPERS

I love depressed mermista

Return of the she-mop!

Oooo seahawk past....

Awee Catra misses Scorpia

And is finally realizin shes gone

O u c h poor Seahawk

OW GLIMMER

HELL YEAH MERMISTA

“A SEAGULL TOLD ME!”

Oooo Catra, a natural born killer~

I love bein able to finally see Octavia in action

Low key musical Ep, hell yesssss

I already shipped mermista and seahawk but this ep... Is just makin me ship it more....

SCORPIA HAS MOMS

The fact that it took this long for Catra to finally go to scorpias room and check on her

How the fuck do the boats work

Ep 9

OHHHHH Razz gets the sheras mixed up thats honestly so cute-

Razz... I lov u

I love her refrences to the old charas

Razzzz awe precious.. The first time...

Oooo I love seein Mara

AWEE LIGHT HOPE SOFT FOR MARA

Good I feel bad for Razz tbh??? hoppin back and forth between Sheras

MARAS TRANSFORMATIONNNNN

God she looks so much better than Adora holy fuck

NOOO RAZZ DONT CRYYY

HOLY FUCKING SH I WHAT THE F U CFDHFDJBKJGBSKED

Hot fucking damn I didnt expect this what the sh iiiiiii

I STILL WANNA HUG RAZZ-

Ep 10

DAMN IM SO COLD XD

That fuckin POOF

PLEAAASSEE LET ME AND WEAVER BOND PLZ I WANT MY GRANDMAAAAA

Let Frosta nap 2020

SCORPIAAAA

DONT SNEAK UP BEHIND SCORPIA

Daaaamn Catra... Go take a nap hun, you look terrible

Oh sweetie.....

Glimmer please you didn’t see what they saw.

Aaaannnnd Okay the queenliness is goin to her head cool

SCORPIA BABYYYY

Caaaatttrrraaaaa

LOOPY LOOP BETRAYAL

God I love them learning the ship

FBHJSDBFSJHVFD OH MY GOD FAKE TEARS

SHE DID IT IM SO PROUD OF HERRR

Ep11

Eeeeee I hope they find my blessed gorl.....

Whats swifty hearin..

OH SHIT SHERA DOESNT WORK-

I cant believe the first ones just have a fucking dump

MICHA MICHAM ICHA ITS MY UCLE I KNOW IT

HELL YEAH BAEBEEEEEE

I KNEW HE WAS ALIVE

Sweet my uncles just a lil crazy haha

MICHA I LOV YOU

Awaaaaaa

Glimmer loses one parent and gains the other. Girl only gets one parent at a time. Hahahaha

The world has to nerf her lmao

Hell yeah hes cool!

Okay cool proof that Lighthope just wants to activate the weapon

Guys just tell him she’s a teenager omfg

Hoooooly hecc

NOOOOOOOO aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

SHE RAAAAA

MY WIIIFFFEEEE

AAAAAAAA

YAASSSS

EEEEE

Ohhhh Scorpia is the key.....

Interesting.......

Ep 12

EVEN WEAVER IS CONFUSED

You bet you ass Ive escaped bitches >:)

-cries- I’ve missed my wife

Awaaa she never changes!

Someone hug Catra I s2g

DT nooooooo

SHE SHOWS NO CONNECTION BECAUSE YOU TOOK IT WEAVER-

I adore Weaver in this season- Who am I kidding, I adore Weaver in every season

THe hoarde is led by two kids who just need some tender love and care

God Ive missed her...

SWEETIE WHY ARE YOU SO CHEERY ALL THE TIME- AAA I LOVE YOU

squinty

Uhhhggggg I now hate that I remember having a runestone of my own

Tho I DO wanna know what kinda powers Scorpia will get....

Sweetie no non onononononononononononononoono

BABY NOOO NO NO O NONONONONONONONONONO

IM GONNA CRY SHE BETTER BE OKAY-

YESS BABY

AWAAA ENTRAPTA I LOVE YOUUUU

bdhsvfbjskbfd I can only do her hair bjkvfdbgfkd

OWO IM SO SMART YET SO DUMB

HORDAK TEARS?!

Hehehehehe YES I HELPED GLIMMER

Ep 13

Nobodies followin Catra anymore lmao

Ohhhh shit Catras gonna d i e

Rip in pieces Hordak

Ohhh shiiiiiiii

SEAHAWK LIL HEART EYES

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I love callin Catra out ohhhh my g o d

OOoooooo Lightning!

I gotta question that rn Glimmer...

Damnit Hordak aint dead...

Ohhh hecc hecc hecc hecc

OH SHIT THE SWORD-

Ya rly just teleport a whole room like that-

I like horde prime-

His eyes are cool and his palette is so much nicer aaaa

Fffffuck

Fave season so far

And not just cause I’m finally in it xD

Expect more posts when the mems really start pouring... Gotta figure out how all this changed in my TL since it DEFINITELY wasn’t just like this-

[tumblunni]

Hhhh bunni legs pain accomplishment day

I HAVE FINISHED THE SHOPPING OF HELL

Tfw u only get paid 4 days before christmas and have to rush everything aaaa

It was bad enough today so i'm so glad i got it done before it got even more busy!

Misc boring essentials i bought for myself: new phone charger cos broken, new trousers cos i spilt hair bleach on my only two pairs, new shoes cos my left shoe literally snapped in half down the middle like wtf even happened there, cheap pink hair dye from a discount store cos i wanna try different colours but in a thrifty way

Now for EXCITING CHRISTMAS PRESENT TIME!!!!

First off SO MANY pc and xbox 360 games from Every Charity Shop In Cardiff, St Mellons, Rumney and Llanrumney. My sis has been trying to find some games to play but was like 'dont worry about it i can just wait til the charity shop gets something good'. So i thought i'd get some stocking stuffers via all the charity shops on my side of town. By our powers combined we will blitz the entire vale of glamorgan's discount gaming scene!!! I found SO MANY good stuff for £1/£2/£3 like holy shit i love when charity shops dont know the proper price for shit XD

speaking of which i also found a WEBCAM for £2! If its that cheap it probanly isnt great but itd still be fun to play around with! :D and the same store also had an old vintage G1 My Little Pony coffee mug in excellent condition. Oh god the nostalgia! My support worker gave me a lift to llanrumney so i had to awkwardly explain why i had an armful of weird 80s mugs and big teary eyes!

Speaking of vintage, i found this new vintage toys and games shop in cardiff called Galactic Attic! The name hooked me in and then they actually DID have pokemon inside! As well as all sorts of stuff ranging from 40s to 90s, wow! There was even a lil pile of old 90s gaming magazines in the corner, covered up by a bunch of boxes. I'm glad i noticed them! I got the announcemt issues for pokemon diamond pearl and platinum in a weird old pokemon fan magazine that i loved as a kid. Im kinda sad that nowadays we just have one official magazine fpr each console and not the wild madness of amateaur journalists failing horribly to get news from japan. Shame they didnt have Beckett Pokemon cos that one was infamous fot drawing its own terrible interpretations of pokemon sprites to avoid copyright. And speaking of terrible, they even had bootleg pokemon!! I talked to the cashier and he was like "you know those are fake right" and i was like "yeah its so nostalgic thats why i want em" and he was like "lol yeah they actually sell pretty well so i'm not mad my supplier ripped me off". It was a pretty good and awesomely terrible fake at the same time? There was this exact replica of some japanese display stand for the product and then the actual pokeball toys looked perfect BUT the mini pokemon inside were.. Really not. I am so damn happy with the surprise inside my one, surprise inside has never been more accurate! I can't take a picture now cos my phone is charging but REGICHEETO. Just..just imagine that, and whatever you're imagining it is probably worse. I love it so fuckin much. Also less hilariously there were some bootleg mini pika plushies with actually (as far as i can tell) their own unique design? They have cute lil winter scarves and an art style that reminds me of the Magical Pokemon Adventure manga. A really cute and good bootleg that i would have loved to see as a real product! The only way you can even tell its a bootleg is because there's no marking on the tail. I dunno, maybe if i still have some brown fabric in the cupboard i could fix it? Or maybe its unique tail makes it even more special! I mean there's Cosplay Pikachu with its double tail marking so maybe this is her cousin Accessory Pikachu with no markings? He just likes wearing scarfs and hats and stuff. OMG HE'S THE POKEMON GO EVENT PIKACHU!!!!!!

Along the miscness of finding a few things for myself, i also found: cute lil pokemon pencilcase, kingdom hearts blind bag, cheap copy of Fruits Basket volume 1 cos the new remake is coming out soon and i wanna Get Hype! The KH blind bag was really weird cos i didnt know they now have an entirely different set as well as the keychains i bought before. Its kind of a shame the art style doesnt match cos vexen is only in the keychains, alas! But i do really love these ones! Theyre apparantly made by funko pop but dont have the art style AT ALL, they just look like really accurate versions of the characters in mini form. Its kinda like the 'distance animation' style in steven universe? (Incidentally they also do SU ones but they missed the opportunitu to actually use the distance style, lol) I got a Sora in his kh2 outfit and i'm decently happy with that, its not one i really wanted but its not a bad one either. But i think now i've tried the fun of surprise once i'll just buy the actual ones i want off ebay later. They have roxas in his organization outfit! With a happy smile!!!

Oh oh and then EVEN MORE XBOX GAMES OF THE WILD THRIFT STORE VOID! i managed to find the whole fable series, two assassins creeds, saints row, gta, some misc shooter games and racers that she wanted but i dont know much about, mass effect 2 and ff13. I think maybe one or two others cos i cant fully remember right now. Theyre all in separate bags strewn across the room and my shoulders feel like death so i'll sort through them later.

Aaaand i wrote up like 14 paragraphs more but tumblr didnt save my draft fpr some fuckin reason and now im way too tired to do it again

Briefer summary:

* had a huge horrible panic attack getting stuck in a skyscraper shopping centre clothes place full of screaming and every perfume smell and WHY DO I HAVE TO NAVIGATE THIS HELL MAZE TO FIND THE ESCALATOR and seriously i was my most primal animalistic self and i went full fight or flight on this bitch

* had a lovely time visiting Cool Shop Grandma and rambled the story of how i met her and how we became friends but hhh too tired to rewrite. But anyway today i gave her a christmas pikachu plush as thanks for everything and cos her shop is moving on to its next location soon. She got really teary and gave me a big hug! She's gonna be at a comic con in march so i hope i'm able to go to that and see her again.

* went on a wild goose chase looking for harry potter merchandise and eventually found a gold plated replica of the movie prop version of the time turner and HELL YES my sis will love it!

* rambled about several market stalls that were cool but i can make a separate post about that in the morning when i find their contact details to advertise them

* got a plushie delibird and decided to take selfies with it everywhere to try and fight my social anxiety somehow. We went to a neat lil restaurant and had cheesy fries and a coke float!

* asked for a refund on an item for the first time ever and im proud of myself

* went off on a mystery bus trip to buy a preowned 3ds and pokemon games from a lady in an online preowned stuff facebook group and it didnt go horribly and i am glad! She was really nice and i witnessed A Good And Smart Parenting Moment and man it healed my heart and i wish i'd been raised that way. Again i'll probably ramble about the details later when im less tired, it really touched my heart seriously! And now i have MANY GIFTS FOR SIS!

* in total i was out present shopping from 9am to 8pm and i clicked my shoulder out of its socket for a split second from.all the heavy bags. Now im in a lot of aches and i need a sleeps

The End

[edelwary]

when you were first getting into art, what and how did you draw? (like did you just doodle ur masterpieces on pieces of paper and posted-notes or did you have a proper sketchbook) how did you find motivation? bc ive been trying to draw but I always get unmotivated and stop while still wanting to get better just by doing nothing.

REALLY LONG, LOTS OF ADVICES FOR ARTISTS : 

TL;DR ; skip to the HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW part bc i have a megaton of shit to say lol + The MOTIVATION part 

mmh… I’ll get into details with this one tbh bc it’s a long ass process ahah : 

I live by the sea ; when i was youung i used to draw TONS of boat, but like, dollhouse boats, you could see the insides and stuff ; i loved to add tiny details and stuff, and imbricate everything together !

around 8 or 9 yo, i went to the public library with school and discovered the wonderful world of mangas ! I basically… Copy pasted an entire Mermaid Melody tome x) 

For about 2 years i alternated between reading mangas and trying to copy them ! Then i just kept drawing in the margins of my schoolwork for about… 5 years ! I have a Fuck Ton of sketchbooks of that time, it was… The start. Lol. Never say it’s bad because it’s never bad, just not there yet !!

Around my 13 yo, i went every saturday, for two years, under a bookstore ; there was a cave, and drawing classes ; that teacher was mean and harsh and stuff, but like… Not really. He would take away my eraser for the class, force me to use pencil, to draw something else (bulky boys instead of magical girls). 

I’ve learned a lot, more in terms of How To LEARN to draw than to draw itself, but i still progressed a LOT !! 

Then i kept drawing by myself for a year and i really worked hard on it ; about hours a day, trying watercolors and stuff ; i have a real problem with colors in traditionnal art, but i’m much better with lines (i should scan some RAD stuff i made in the weekend, yall ive never done anything this good i stg i dont know why i always forget im so much better on paper) 

This gets us to my sweet 16 ; i have to year of advance, bc i got ‘’’promoted’’’ idk how to say it ; anyways, i entered my (current) animation school for the first year at 16; vERY IMPRESSIVE AND TERRIFYING. 

And i learned. A fuckmegaton. Of shit there. 

Now i’m going for my third year there and i can make photorealistic marmora blades and cyberkpunk decors if i want to and that’s rad, but here is

 HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW : 

I have one HYPER important advice, and i’m keeping it to heart since i’m like, 11 : Have. Sketchbooks. Please !!! It’s very important. Here’s why : 

You keep everything with you in one place. You have 1 sketchbook, it’s basically easy to take every where (a A5, or A4 are pretty easy to carry, i have like, 12 of those, and around 8 of A3) 

You keep track of what you’ve done. It’s super important, bc first you can cry of laughter at your old stuff bc its cute but not so good, and second, you can just be like ‘holy mama’ and see how much you’ve improved

It’s very important to be organized. I WORK in art, and trust me, if there’s something that i’ve learned this year through tears and missing files and bugs : Be. Impeccable. Now if it’s for fun, go a little loose, and just have a folder for art on your computer, and a sketchbook, no need to stress, but the better you try to keep a record of where is what, the better you’ll see whats wrong

Notebooks are friends !! You can draw, write, glue stuff, make notes, lists, everything !!! I have my life in those. It’s more important to me than any of my phones. 

Be proud of it. Like, not everything, duh ! But try to tell yourself than it’s like a RPG ; even if it’s only 2 xp here and there, one day you’ll beat level 40, and that’s super important : art is. Fuckin. Long.

I cant stress it enough. It’s soooo long !!! SO LONG !! it’s years. It’s like karate and fishing and ANYTHING. To be good at it, it takes time, but it WILL COME if you keep trying. There’s no secret passage. 

You’re gonna me it, believe in me who believes in you. 

Use. References. 

Coming from a little shit who’s got a really good visual memory, that can sound like bs, but i stg everything is always AT LEAST twice as good if you’ve used a visual support. 

I’m not saying COPY EVRYTHING (even though thats a good training) I’m saying, if you really want to do that asian tiger, please have at least two or three pictures of it nearby. Take photos of your hands, and stuff ! 

Make it harder. 

No eraser. 

Paint. 

I draw all my backgrounds on my sketchbook with INDIAN INK; no returns, no refunds. 

Ink, Ink, INK !! Don’t allow mistakes.

And if you make mistakes :

New page, restart

It’s okay

It’s for you

I once started back again a whole EXAM bc it was bad, i got one of my best grades 

You’ll improve and be more assured if you know you just have to DO IT. Trust me. It’s VISIBLE; if you can erase, you fidget and hesitate and ‘’kbeujebez hahhaaa idkkidsd’’ ; stop ; do it, and if you don’t like it ? Try again, there’s no time limit

Draw as large as you can 

There’s no interesting story here, it just helps. Bigger movement of the hand, more place for details, breathing lines

Thin lineart helps

Thinner. Make it even thinner

Break the rules, but not the ones that structure your art 

Big lineart ? Why not

Unfinished lines, vaporeous colors ? Pretty

Cubism is actually based on extensive and intense practice of classical art, it’s not wibbly wooblly ; the anatomy is more correct than you think 

Structure and composition are important, but so is movement and life ; choose your fighter ; mine is fluidity and fun, i’m like, a rogue/archer in drawing. Some people are dwarf fighter. That’s amazing and great. 

Don’t be afraid to do nothing

Pages and pages of my sketchbooks are actually just lance facing right and smiling, you know… 

Sometimes it just doesnt work : two ways :

Take a break, Kiki’s delivery service style

Keep trying, break your art until it obeys and comes back

Take breaks. Breath. 

Don’t compare. I do it, it doesn’t help at all. You’ll make it ; and if you compare, keep in mind that everyone’s different

I’m not gonna lie, it’s NOT easy, it’s even hard 

But I really, really think it’s worth it 

MOTIVATION :

My main bitch 

I’m always pumped for art because i can LITTERALLY NOT do anything else ; i love reading and writing and stuff but at the end of the day i just want !!! to draw !!!! aaaaaa-

Fall in love with it, and with the possibilities ; i have stories to tell, tell me yours ! Do your best, one day it WILL work

Actual advices : 

I have an inspiration blog where i just reblogs stuff i like to draw them later

Find a picture, copy it. Do it again. Change the characters (i have 2 ocs and Lance and Keith as default characters) in the pic. 

Like an artstyle ? Break it to its very core, analyse it, copy it, redo it, trace it and ABSORB it. Don’t copy/past, LEARN from your heroes.

Do what you like. I have 86578 pieces of voltron, this is not a coincidence. I have ENDLESS ideas for this show, wtf. 

Try new things. Buy indian ink im begging you. It’s so cool. 

Have a game with yourself, or a challenge. STICK TO IT. 

Study. When you’re bored, usually it’s because you’re stagnating. Make it harder or do hands until you cry. 

Love your backgrounds; make backgrounds, study trees, and tokyo streets, and venice’s bridges. Decor is just as cool as characters, if not more

Mess a little with everything. My roomate more than one found me stained from head to toes trying to DO STUFF 

Draw outfits. Draw what you want but can’t afford 

MAKE YOUR LIFE A COMIC. Remember those sketchbooks ? Make a comic a week/month/every full moon, whatever, and draw your life (mine’s the roomates au lol) 

Prompts blogs are cool too 

Make fanart of a fic you liked ; you have the characters and the pose already, you just have to illustrate ; double bonus, you probably will make a writer’s day, if not year !

That little movie that plays when you listen to your favorite song ? DRAW IT

Your favorite scene in your favorite movie ? Redraw each shot. On post it. Plus it looks awesome afterwards to have the infamous TREX scene of Jurassic Parks in post it

Get bored. That’s inevitable. Dance, scream, get back to it. Walk, draw everything you see. 

Make a paper google map street view : Take a walk : every 50 meters, draw what is in front of you. 

Snapchats your friends. Draw their snapchats when they answer 

Draw maps. Invent places. Invent bikes, and hovercrafts, and monsters. Make your everyday inventory. Make your life a video game, and do the concept arts of it. 

FETCH your inspiration. I have approx. 20 artbooks, full of drawings and concept arts of my fave movies/games ; take what you like and add it to the story you have since you’re 8. We all have one. 

Ask for it ; your sis, your mom, me even ! If you dont have ideas, someone will have them. 

WELL i’m gonna stop there, even though i got like, 9864567 more to say, but with this you should be fine ! Anon, i’m rooting for you ! we all start somewhere, just hold on!!!! 

[nickrbockr]

Simon Vs Fan Fic: Chapter 4 - Trust your Gut

I landed early and Leah was there to pick my tired butt up from the trip (I can never sleep on planes). I told her it had to happen in Shady Creek and she was on board with it and that made me feel better. Our first day back was filled with catching up in between first day boring syllabus reviews in classes.

Freshman are forced to live on campus their first year and I had an interesting, but forgettable roommate. I have friends in the theatre department here, but starting sophomore year, Leah and I lived together in a nice (and affordable) apartment. Mom and Dad helped us with the rent, Dad being happy that it was the last year he had to pay. People kept telling us we were crazy to live with a friend, but since we’ve been friends for so long and Leah is…well Leah, who always spoke her mind, we never had any issues.

Luckily for both of us, we are great cooks at exceedingly different aspects. I am a stovetop master and handle dinners and savory breakfasts and Leah is a baking champion and handles sweet breakfasts and lunches. Yin-Yang of food: I wake up to waffles and Leah comes home to stir-fry. It’s a match made in love handles.

Ever since my best friend in the department caught on, Ian would come over from time to time to eat both breakfast and dinner, and we swore lunch because our peanut butter would mysteriously be consumed at a fast rate. Ian’s a diamond in the rough in the sense that is he one of the only straight men in the theatre department. This makes him a perfect ladies man because everyone assumes he’s gay when we go out together, girls talk to us, I tell him ‘Oh, my boyfriend’s calling me,’ and that opens the conversation to his heterosexuality and he leaves me with a wink and a finger gun.  I’d give it the ‘ol Leah exhale if Ian and I hadn’t perfected it so much.

Outside of that aspect of Ian, he’s a great actor and has, on the hateful occasions, defended me against some drunk country boys at the city bars. Leah calls me his ward and Bram found it too funny. It’s not that funny, but Ian is a guy I know I’ll be friends with for the rest of my life.

“Aaaaaaaaayooooooooo Si-Si,” Ian yelled as he busted in the door and bear hugged me.

“Ugh, I regret it giving him a key already,” Leah said, not standing from the dinner table.

“What’s on the menu tonight?”

“Chicken BLT with pesto mayo and rice.”

Ian glanced over at Leah, “The TA checks musta kicked in with a two course meal, Le Burke.”

Leah and I both paid equally for the food, but Leah was the one who did the shopping. Because she loved it. Also, she actually doesn’t mind Ian’s nickname for her because he gives it a French pronunciation. Also, and she’ll never admit this because it’s against everything she believes, but she maaaaaay have a slight crush on him.

“It’s our last year Ian, may as well live it up, right?”

We all ate and caught up from the summer. Leah regaled us of her TA duties by day, and wine-infused studying by summer night, I bragged about Bram & I’s historic Splash Pad attendance since Bram saw my minute abs I formed junior year and wanted to show me off, and Ian explained his summer back in South Dakota camping every weekend with his high school buddies.

“Dude, have you ever seen the stars without light pollution?” Ian asked, in a serious tone.

“Yes, Ian, Si and I have the capability of turning our head up.” Leah said sarcastically.

“Yeah, but when you did, were you within or outside of the yellow light of the city.”

“Come on, Ian, Midwest dudes aren’t the only dudes who can see stars,” I validate. It reminded me of when Bram and I took a trip this summer with Nick & Abby to an AirBnB beach house. All days were spent as a group, but once the sun finally set, it was hard to not sneak into our bedrooms at opposite ends of the house and do what couples do. I try not to tell Leah about too much as she gets mad FOMO (fear of missing out).

“Okay, so you know what that looks like when the sky comes to life and you see the billions of other starts that you normally can’t see and all it took was unplugging and going out on your adventure.”

“But you don’t need just to see stars to feel that way, Ian,” Leah claims.

“Okay Le Burke, fine, but we all have that place we can go that makes us emotionally unpack, and not in the lets talk about our feelings way, but in the I feel less pressure from society and what it expects of me way. Where’s that for you?” Ian points at her.

“My bedroom.” Leah states.

“Your bedroom? Really?”

“Yeah, what’s wrong with that?”

“I dunno, seems trapped to me.” Ian answers, helping himself to the last BLT.

“You’re an extrovert, I’m an introvert, I don’t see a cramped room, I see a space in the entire universe that is built specifically for me and my liking and it relaxes me!”

Ian took a big bite and replied with a mouth full, “You know what, you got a point Le Burke.”

“Enough time around me, you’ll find I always know what I’m talking about.”

“What about you, Simon?” Ian asked.

I hadn’t been listening the conversation. When Ian asked about the place where we can emotionally unpack, all I could think about was that night on the Ferris wheel with soft eyes Bram Greenfeld in his strong arms next to his soccer calves. Though many people were around us, that little carriage built for two felt the most weight lifting experience.

“Si? Earth-to-Si,” Leah said in a robot voice.

“The ring,” I start. “Would it be tacky to get a ring that looks like a ferris wheel?”

“I didn’t take you for the man jewelry type, Si” Ian laughed, taking another bite that was probably a bit too big.

“A ferris wheel would just look like a merry-go-round on its side and I don’t think that’s cute.” Leah replied. “Besides, it would be a statement engagement ring and Bram isn’t really a statement jewelry person.”

“Engagement ring?” Ian muffled out of his mouth. “Are you proposing to Bram?”

“Oh, shit. Yes, Ian, I’m proposing to Bram in January.”

Ian spit out the food onto his plate to the lament of Leah and powered over to me to give me another bear hug.

“Fuck yeah Si! That’s so fuckin’ cool congratulations!”

Ian is obsessed with Bram. On the occasions Bram visited me up here, Ian steals him away so they can talk about soccer. Bram loves it because it’s hard to talk soccer in Baltimore, so I usually have to peel Ian off of Bram. Ian always asks Bram jokingly if he has a sister and Bram always lets him know she’s only five.

He finally let me go and went back to his spit out food and put it back in his mouth to finish.

“Are you fucking serious Ian?!” Leah screamed.

“I don’t want to waste food on such a beautiful evening. We have to celebrate.”

Celebrating turned into shots and beers and the rest of the night we spent talking about the show line up for our senior year and which roles we’d want verses the one we may be assigned. Leah explained her classes and we got into brief sociology based debates. Around one A.M., Ian was asleep on the couch and Leah and I were in my room, head to head, just like in high school.

“So I was thinking and you’re right, I think the ferris wheel ring maybe too much.”

“Maybe a little.” Leah replied in a slight slur. “It could have been worse, you could have suggested an Oreo ring.”

She’s right, unfortunately. We both laughed a drunken laugh.

“Know of any cool ring shops in New Haven?” I ask. “I wanna start looking.”

“Si, don’t rush this. Let the ring find you. The one ring-”

“TO RULE THEM ALL!” We both finish.

“When I brought it up to Dad, he just said ‘do you trust me’ and so I don’t know if he’s helping me or not.” I explain.

“Maybe trust your Dad. You’ll be proposing in Shady C anyway, take a chance on your Jack Spier.”

We both chuckle and talk a few more minutes until Leah goes to bed and I’m left staring at my ceiling. I grabbed my laptop and began some drunken Google searching for engagement ring ideas and of course they’re all the most un-Bram like options.

But…like what could I get Bram that will scream us, but at the same time be elegant and show how much I love him? I am leaning towards no stone…I think Bram and I are simple folk with simple tastes. Bram tastes like…no, focus, get my hand out of my pants.

Should I put the ring in a sleeve of Oreos and have him open it? I mean, it know how tacky it sounds because it’s so tacky, but would Bram like how tacky it is and just think it’s cute? Where is the tipping point!?

Bzzz

Bram I hope you had a good first day! I’m assuming Ian’s passed out already? ;)

And just like that, my ring anxiety began to dissolve.

                                                                                               I did and he is!                                                             For a bro, he’s not much of a drinker

. .. … If you talk about soccer, he’ll drink you under the table. He runs on pure adrenaline when you bring up Argentina.

                                                           You know I tried, and it didn’t work                             I think I’m missing the Bram-factor in my conversation

. .. … I’m missing the Simon-Spier.

                                                           Strange, I thought you had my heart                                         Be sure you don’t lose it, it’s the only one I have

. .. … I keep it in the space mine was because you seem have taken mine.

                                                                                                                 <3              Above is evidence I have yours, show me mine so I know it’s safe

. .. … <3 It isn’t going anywhere. Oh, also, I almost forgot. Mom is going to be in New Haven guest lecturing for the...ugh, Women Sexual Studies Class.

Holy shit, this is perfect. I was going to call her but this is a thousand times better. In person, somehow, seems easier because I can see her reactions. Bram’s Mom and I get along great…I think. She allows me to call her by her first name, Tracy, so that’s a start. I just don’t think we’ve ever really had a chance to talk about anything but Bram, so our relationship is just a little one-note, but think we’re both okay talking about Bram that much.

                        Even after four years, Ms Every Time Including Oral strikes again!                                               That’s great, I’ll call her tomorrow to get the details.                                                                                                 I’ll make her dinner.                                             Remind me, her favorite dish is baked salmon right?

. .. … Yes. Simon, you’re too kind. You don’t even like salmon.

                                                                                               Yeah, but I love you.

. .. … <<33 That’s your big heart, still with me. I love you more.

                                                                                                             Impossible.

I fall asleep and wake up to my alarm and more textual love from Bram. I roll out of bed, shower, and get Ian’s ass up for class. Leah already had an egg bake on the table with a note that said ‘Warm me for a minute in the microwave nerds.’ Ian stuffs an extra large portion in his mouth and straps on his bag. I pull us out the door and we jump into Ian’s beat-up Buick to Acting IV.

At lunch I call Tracy and she let’s me know she’ll be here Thursday night for a full day of lectures on Friday. She sounded excited to be asked to lecture and hopefully a good mood enough to hear me wanting to marry her son.

Tuesday comes and goes (for dinner it was just Leah and me and I made us homemade pizza with a cauliflower crust and actually. Actually it wasn’t half bad. Normal crust is always better, but it wasn’t bad).

Wednesday night Leah and I are in the library, me searching for monologues and she posting up to help the Intro to Sociology class students write a big surprise essay assigned by a notoriously hard professor.

“I hope the sociology professors see the irony in making me slave away helping their students cause they’re too lazy.” Leah scoffs, chewing a big piece of pink bubblegum.

“Isn’t that the gig of a Teacher’s Assistant?” I’m burning through stacks of books I stole from the shelves and have a few to photocopy of already earmarked monologues from actor’s past.

“Be on the right side of history, Simon. I’m supposed to assist the teacher, not the student. I got the salmon, by the way, I pulled it from the freezer this morning.”

I gave her a puppy dog smile and head tilt. “This is why you’re the Queen.”

“Damn straight. Know what you’re going to say?”

“No,” I reply. “But I’ve landed the best people in my life by going in without a plan…pretty much my entire life is that.”

“I’m not here to be your English professor, Google how to set up a works cited page!” Leah shouts at a baby freshman. He runs off and frantically types away at his laptop. “Trust your gut, Si, trust your gut. All of it except the part that thought a ferris wheel ring, though, throw that part in the trash.”

I scanned copies of the chosen monologues to work on and we went home. Abby and Nick Skyped us and we all caught up since leaving each other this summer. We planned trips and talked about classes and how Abby and Nick saw Benedict Cumberbatch walking in New York. I fell asleep that night as a usually do, texting Bram, and woke up Thursday morning to cook Leah and I omelets. The rest of the day flew by because before I knew it I was back at home prepping dinner.

I tidied up the apartment as Leah left to study at the library again. She was worried the students would still be there and ask her for helps so she, honest to God, wore a wig to throw them off. I chuckled as she sashayed out the door. Even though I don’t like to eat salmon, I’m a natural when it comes to cooking it and I had all the food ready as soon as Tracy knocked at the door. We hugged and exchanged kisses on the cheek as she presented a bottle of red wine. Then she flew past me into the kitchen and she checked the salmon.

After a deep inhale, she smiled. “Simon, I must say you know how to season.”

“Practice makes perfect, Tracy.”

We made small talk about her trip up here, which evolved into her career taking off. That quickly transitioned into the points she was covering in her lecture during the classes until we both finished eating, but she saw me playing with remnants of potatoes with my fork.

“So, Simon, what are your plans after college?”

“Oh, you know,” I started. “Bram and I were talking of living in New York for awhile. Professors here have some connections to companies there and if I pay my cards right I can get some steady work right away. Bram said he’d love to write for the New York Times, so it’s a perfect move. He mentioned a professor there is on the staff and wrote him a great letter of recommendation, so that’s exciting. Hoping to focus on having fun this year too before we have to be full-fledged adults.”

“Sure sounds like the planning part of Bram rubbed off on you. He gets that from me, trust me.”

“Yeah, Bram is, the greatest, Tracy. I actually wanted to talk to you about Bram.”

I swallowed hard and set my fork down. I was still formulating the words, so I covered myself quickly and picked up the bottle of wine. I got the nerves I felt right before an audition. This audition, however, I couldn’t afford to screw up.

“Refill?”

Tracy nodded with a raised eyebrow and I topped off her glass.

“Seems you want me a little buzzed for this, Simon.”

The audition started. “Oh, no, no, not buzzed. It is custom to have a drink if you’re celebrating something.”

“Oh? What are celebrating tonight?”

Bram…Bram…Bram. Saying his name calmed my nerves. Picturing his lips and remembering his scent centered me.

“Tracy. I am so madly…deeply…overwhelmingly in love with Abraham. My life has been nothing like I could have imagined it or deserved it and it is because of him. I want to always be with him and, because of that, I wanted to make you aware of my intentions. Tracy, my intentions are to ask your son to marry me and before I do, I wanted to ask for your blessing as his mother.”

Tracy tilted her head in the way Bram does and covered her mouth with her right hand. A loud inhale through her nose told me she had an emotional reaction to the news, and I was hoping it was tears of joy. She dropped her hand and a large smile crossed her face (Bram got his smile from her. Definetely).

“Simon Spier. The fact that you...that you gave my son the courage…that you make my son happy…that you cooked me dinner and asked me…I see the way you look at my son and I see the way my son looks at you and even Elijah and I never looked at each other they way you both do. My goal as a mom was to give Abraham a great life and a better one than mine and it looks like this will be just another strong foundation to that claim.”

Tracy put her hand onto mind and squeezed it.

“Simon, you absolutely have my blessing.”

YES, YES,YES! With tears in both our eyes, we hug each other. I pour the last of the wine between our glasses and we chees to me, to Bram, and to us.

“Thank you, Simon. I know you didn’t have to do this, or ask, and it means a lot to me that you did.” Then she became serious for a minute. “Do you intend on asking my ex-husband?”

Is that…a trick question?! Audition not over.

“Yes,” I start wearily. “I wanted to be sure I can tell Bram both of his parents gave me their blessing. I wanted to be sure that you both know how much I intend to love and care for your son. I’m not sure I can fully explain or find the right metaphors to show to what capacity I care for him, but I will spend the rest of my life trying to perfect it into a simple phrase that, when I figure it out, I will tell you.”

Tracy smiled and burst into a happy, crying laughter.

“Simon, since the moment we met, I never had a doubt that you would marry my son. I’m so happy and excited for both of you.”

A tear dropped down my face. What an enormous compliment from a mother to another about her son. I smiled and went on to explain to her when I was planning on proposing.

“Of course, how perfect! Do you have a ring?”

“Funny story, Tracy. Dad said that he’d help me with that, and I’m going to put my bet that he will deliver. After twenty-one years, he has yet to let me down.”

“Wonderful, I can’t wait to see it.”

“Yes, so I was still arranging how I wanted to propose and one scenario has me doing in front of my parents and you and Elijah.”

“Such an old soul in a young man. Why so formal?”

That’s a good question. Maybe…maybe it’s because Bram and my middle school and high school experience wasn’t conventional. And that maybe there is a comfort in being a part of a conventional process. Plus, it’s respectful and is bound to earn me brownie points with the possible new in-laws.

“I trust my gut, Tracy. My gut told me formal.”

“Trust your gut, Simon. It’s made all sorts of great decisions. But I have one, very important question for you.”

I clear my throat. “Uh, yes, of course.”

“Do we have more wine?”

We laugh and Tracy explains it’s getting late and excuses herself back to her hotel room.

When I check my phone, I have a few missed texts from Bram.

Hey! I hope Mom is going easy on you. Be careful, she will try to judge how you seasoned the fish, but I’m confident you’ll pass. I taught you well. I can see you both eating the food right now and I’m super jealous I can’t be there. Well, not super jealous if Mom talks about her lecture, which she will. Text me when you can! I know you’re being courteous and won’t check your phone while she’s there. I’m so confident in that fact that I’m going to send you a picture.

Below that text was a well-curated picture of Bram’s nether region.

                                                                                                Bram! Scandalous! Though you were right, Tracy just left. We finished a bottle of wine, sorry I got her tipsy! You’re right, she did talk about her lecture, but it’s focused on female anatomy, something we needn’t worry. I love you Bram. I love you so much. And that picture, you better be careful or it may start something.

 . .. … Start something, huh? I’m not afraid. Show me what you got! ;)

You can imagine what the rest of the night turned into.

[tamisdava-blog]

Me and my sis playing lobotomy corporation

Me: Sis, please make my wish :3

sis: oh god what now?

*after hours of persuasion*

Me: finally!

Sis: FML

*game starts*

Me: so lets start with basics! *explains everything about abnormalities, the skull guy(dont force me to write their full names please) act and TRALALALA!

Sis: fuck this shit! *runs away after first day in game*

Me: COME BACK HERE NYAAAAAAAH! *chasing*

*after a week of chasing my sister*

Me: lets start again :3

sis: FML again.

*this time i somehow holded her so she wasn't able to run this time!*

me: choose our new abnormally monster!

sis: this cant get any worse right? *chooses grandma*

*i already had grandma before i started playing this game so its was easy*

me: nu how? :3

sis: the game is getting more interesting.

me: LETS CHOOSE! >:3

Sis: *chooses meat lantern*

me: o i didn't had this in my first walkthrought!

Sis: OMG this one is so cute :3

me: yep :3

*after of our first meeting with meat lantern*

Me: WTF?! IT RAN AWAY?!

sis: whata you said?

Me: SEARCH IT!

SIS: WHEREEEE?!

Me: SHOW THE BASE!

Sis:...

*Meat Lantern comes out and eats someone*

Me and my sis: O_O ... *dead silence*

Sis: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?! I THOUGHT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE CUTE!

ME: I SAID THAT I DIDN'T MET IT! WHY YOU CHOSE IT?! PANICKING! PANICKING!

*after we learned about it more and we with miracle completed the day*

ME: oh so its only needed temperence lvl 1...

Sis: choosing new one! *chooses theresia*

*the next day in game*

Me: so... oh you chose Theresia :D

Sis: let me guess you already had this one and it was good?

Me: yep

*next day opening information team!*

Sis: sis i chose a butterfly!

me: *looks* O_O *sights* thanks to god its not butterfly, its just a fat fairy.

Sis: oki doki!

*choosing the burning girl!*

Sis: oh its new right?

me: lets not touch her.

Sis: But-

me: I SAID NOPE!

*because of problems we weren't able to complete this day fast and we were stuck there for a long time*

Me: HOLY SHIT! WE ARE DOOMED!

Sis: what?

Me: *turns her head* THE BURNING GIRL! SHE RAN AWAY! WE ARE SO DOOMED! SHE IS GOING TO BOOM AND KILL EVERYONE THERE!

Sis: AAAAAAH WHAT SHOULD WE DO!

ME: MOVE THEM! MOVE THEM IN OTHER ROOM!

SIS: OH *%# IT ISN'T WORKING!

ME: FUUUUUUUUCKAA!

*the burning girl boomed*

Me and sis: O_O

Me: wait they are alive?

Sis: HOly i dont know what to say here! THEY ARE ALIVE!

*happy music and hugging with tears*

After that day in game*

Sis: *chooses the naked woman*

Me: *oh crap i dont remember what we should do with her* *i played demo but i dont remember .-_-.*

Me: lets test her instincts!

*and after because of other reason we weren't able to complete the day fast*

Sis: *SCREAMS* OH MY CRAP! WHAT THE HECK WAS THIS .O_O.

Me: oh i remembered. SHE DID IT! *points on naked woman with a evil voice* because we weren't visiting her fo a long time she decided to scare us :D

Sis: you couldn't warned me?!

Me: nah :D

*after that day in game*

Sis: AAH MY EYES! I AM ALREADY TIRED!

ME: Me too :) *cant close eyes*

Sis: *chooses book that is made from skin*

Sis: lets check it?

Me: nope

*opening training team!*

Sis: *chooses butterfly face*

ME: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! D: FUCK YoU!

Sis: you are saying it to me?

Me: TO BOTH OF YOU! You know why he holds coffin?

Sis: em no?

Me: oh i'll tell you why! FOR THE START HE WILL RUN AWAY AND HE WILL KILLS EVERYONE AND HE WILL PUT US IN THAT COFFIN!

Sis: met him?

Me: YES AND BECAUSE OF HIM I LOST GAME D::( WHY THE HECK YOU DIDN'T ASKED ME BEFORE CHOOSING THIS MOTH THAT CRAPS IN THAT COFFIN!

Sis: wait does he really do it? :)

Me: NEIN! AND STOP PISSING ME FOR FUN!

*after our first meeting with him*

Me: FML he just ran out.

Sis: what should we do?

Me: send our people to die, we'll lose anyway -_-

Sis: why the heck you are so heartless?!

Me: in real life i amn't heartless and you in real life aren't so emotional.

sis: but we are sending them to death!

ME: Oh wait i am a bad cop and you are good cop! And btw that butterfly face is death himself belive me, i experienced that.

Sis: oh Holy cheese burger without meat, Meat lantern ran out!

ME: we are sooo craped!

*meat lantern eats someone*

Me: OMG TAK DO YOU SEE IT?!

Sis: ???

Me: that stupid moth is going to Meat Lantern.

ME and sis: HAHAHAHAA *evil laught* we are going to see the battle of titans!

*the butterfly attacks Lanter from far*

ME: ok lantern is doomed how i see

Sis: COME ON COMECOKEMCOEMCOEMC ON@!

*the stupid butterfly goes to Meaty*

Me and sis: OH SHITOHSHITOHSHIT! MEAT LANTERN WON! OUR SAVIOR! .^_^.

sis: oh shit there is only Yuri left.

Yuri: .o-o. *the only poor worker left alive*

Me: faster lets collect energy before that stupid thing that is butterfly or moth with coffin ran away again.

*didn't make it in time and that stupid thingo with coffin ran away and with him ran away Meat lantern*

ME: LMAO our savior knows when he needs to help us >:D

Sis: he is truly our savior >:>D

*and meaty won this time too*

Me and sis: WE WON!

Yuri: Fuck those stupid girls .o~o.

*continuing*

*after this day bootyfly ran away again*

Sis: W.H.A.T W.E S.H.O.U.L.D D.O?

Me: we should force Meaty to run away. What he dislikes more?

Sis: ... Repression.

me: lets do it!

*after of several times doing so*

Sis: why the heck it isn't running away?!

Me: IDK D:

Sis: lets do something else with him!

ME: NOOOO! He dislikes this REPRESSION!

Sis: i promise if we'll lose i wont start playing this game again!

Me: like you would have a choice. You remember that i am having birthday in march? =)

Sis: FML >:>

Yuri: please butterfly with the dam coffin come and kill me! because of them died my friends! i want to be with them!

Butterfly: Nu if you are asking me, i'll try to come =)

Yuri: NO NO! come now! I cant take it anymore!

ME: oh fuckin dam miracle Meaty finally broke free!

Sis: finally.

*meaty eats Yuri*

me and sis: O_O'

Butterfly: you %^## i wanted to kill him! >=(

Meaty: *turns* you can fight me and take him from my belly if you wont lose again you stupid moth in a costume!

Angela: Managers, you lose the day, you should start this day over.

Me and sis: ok lets watch the battle of titans 2 and we'll go to sleep

Angela: but-

Me and sis: shhhhhhhh

Angela: *sight* what a stupid kids. *disappears*

Sis: *closes game*

Me: whatcha think?

Sis: i thought Meaty was on our side!

Me: tak-tak we repressioned it, you know that its bad right? you would like it on his place?

Sis: But it was Yuri we just were commanding-

Yuri's ghost: *shows middle fingers*

Sis: wait, justice was executed, Yuri repressioned meaty and he was eaten, we were commanding him and many died because of us so we lost the game.

Yuri: fuck you *goes in heaven*

Me: karma, now i feel bad. Meaty was the one who saved us, and with what we paid him? We just repressioned him till he ate Yuri.

Sis: geez i didn't thought that the game would be so hard.

*after the week*

ME: *opens game* *restarts game*

Angela: *sits on chair with a turned back* *turns* Oh so you came back... without your big sister, i see...

To be continued?

Lobotomy corporation is really a great game. In my opinion it deserves more fans and respect, its still a demo but its great and now it has a plot.

[yandererichietozier]

pass the happy along! when you get this, reply with five things that make you happy then send this to the last ten people in your activity!

SRY THIS IS LATE I JST NOTICED THIS NOW!!!

1. MY INTERESTS!!! currently like. IT makes me super fuckin happy bc its a big SI of mine atm, but i’ve been fixating on B.99 recently tbh it’s so sexy

2. MY BFS!!! MY BFS ARE SO SO CUTE, i love them so much, one of em sent me a cute bunny plush as a late christmas gift or sth nd its so cute. i love them sm, they both say rly sweet things n are both just super funny i can’t wait to get to know them more n spend as much time as i can w/ them!! i adore them

3. MY FRIENDS!!! I ALSO RLY LOVE MY FRIENDS, esp my butch mom @sunbutch & the horror kin squad, they all put up w/ my bs nd dumb jokes so i rly do love them all sm

4. MUSIC BICH!!! I love music sm it’s my fuckign life line, esp buddy holly & frankie lymon. holy fuck their voices are so smooth, i love buddy holly sm he’s like an idol fr me rn. but yeah generally i fucking love music, esp instruments like the trumpet n guitar which im planning on learning in th future

5. UUHHHH sth else that makes me happy is probs how far ive come n how im trying so fucking hard to improve myself even though i do dumb shit like trying to push myself harder than i should rather than taking baby steps-- BUT. IM A LOT BETTER THAN I WAS LAST YEAR TBH, SO IM WORKIN TOWARDS RECOVERY THIS YEAR FUCK YEHA

[jungkookio]

bias tag game

hoooooooo boy so i was tagged by @hoodiejungkook​ @literally-just-yoongi-trash​ @aragyeom​ to do this... y do u want me to expose myself like this

Rules: write down the last 15 associated tags with your bias.  

yoongs:

#take his belt and choke me with it

#not to be nsfw buti have an undying need to fucking hug this man 

#when wiwllhe start capitalising on his sweat as a highlight tbh #i wna tthtta glowhgngnnfngngnghhggghhg #why is my grandpa man so hot ti rlly wanan dfckkin d8 him

#omfg fuck off #look at him hes a dumpling #a soot ball #he owns the key to m heart #honestly im rlly soft over my boys tonight #im cryign in th club

#im sorry but he looks like that sailor moon 'but you didnt do anything' meme #but like hot

#im... rlly out here loving this loser i cannot believe myself #i fell in love with some grandpa infant hybrid #look at this pingu lookin ass god i love him so much

#who let this emo kid out the house #wheres his mum

#c hoke #what the fuck wjat the fuck #when will he fucking spit on me #whatthehfuxuckgoddddddddddddddd he #what the fuck i swear everyone wants me to roll into a coma and fucking die #i hope ifkckng choke seriously what thejfuck is thsi #what is his problem why is he like this

#thsi is the begsat theing to evr hapoenr yi me shsudjrnshjsjrbndkansb pleaese

#ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my god you own my fucking heart #u cld own my kidney too if u ever need it just ask

#i want him to tuck him in n kiss his forehead but i also want him to spit in my mouth u feel? #probably not #kinkshame me

#okay... he gettin thicker #i love my man's pancake ass okay #im eatin well tonight !!/1!!1/! #nourished !! #acvdhdjsjbdbsjsj hav i evr mntiond i hte mslf

#i love him so much ohmygod  #!! fuck !! #m heart went nyooooooooooooom  #💟💖💗💕💓💝💟💓💕💖💞💗💟💖💕💞💓💝💟💕💞💓💝💟💗💞💕💗💟💓💝💕💗💟💖💖💟💕💞💓💖💗

#m heart just launched outta m chest #idk wht t doabout it tbh #i... need that

#ohmygodohmyogogododdoohohoh #hooh my fuckicjg n god #im fucking malfunctioning btixch #bwaht the fuck he looks so fucking goood #hes rlly rpepin the gays again inhis flannel #an icon #he looks like a billion fckng dollars bitxchm im rlly choking #im gna eat a fucking shoe i love him so mcuh #godthey rlly mad ehim blond again #i dk what to domblond yoongs has always been m favourtei #n im alwaysh fucking screaming about it and bitch x hes rlly blodn n im rlly crying because fuck #hhes in his fckckng prime okay #hes th mc of m heartmcnncnnnnnggggggggggggggjhsbdhjbfhbnj

jungkook:

#i wanna punch him in th face #but with lovecause i love him so much  #i cld never hurt him #honestly i'd much rather him sucker punch me in the jaw #look at him he's such a shit but he's my favourite #eugghhdghhdhhhhjjhhjhj 

#he cld crush a bitxch with those thighs #(its me) #(im the bitxch) #(please crush me)

#fucking b e a n me #rightin th fckn skull #just straight up fucking murder me #what kinda zoom #its all so shiny #hes fckng gleaming #his shirt is fcking gleaming #meanwhile im constructing my coffin while i wait for him to b e a n me #the fuck

#biyxch his tiddies bigger than mine

#its always th lasttwo gufs that tip me over the edge #m reachign fr th mfing gun bitxch #i hate this shirt n its aphrodisiac bullshit #oyster juice #it had to have been soaked in fckng ousyetr juice #can u hear my inner turmoil sis............. this shirt has victimised me #the shirt #it strikes again

#wow look its my emo boyfriend

#ggggggggggggggno the shirt can fuck off #whoever manufactured it #you know what no it wasnt manufactured #it was hand crafted by satan himself to fucking tempt me to evil #show me a single fancam of mr jeon fucking jungkook in that shirt where he doesnt look at one with the fucking devil #find me one! #i can guarantee u wont find any bitxch #possessed #absolute blasphemy #i hope i fckign burn in hell

#the second gif is him throwing my heart out the fucking window

#ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my gohd how can he be this cute while literally drnched in sweat #ion kno but hes gleaming #shining #glowing even #he hsa no faults #look at his smile it cld make flwers grow fck off #n the stars are in his eyes #all of them #im real emo tonight #hes so bright #the most beautiful boy #a baby #my best baby boy in th whole wrld #i wld gv hm m everythng #i love hm so mch m heart is so full #im nourished

#this era makes m choke on air #he was so rude the entire time i really hsatge bjgbnkgjbnfdkjbdfj bjbngnbkgnbkgfkbng #...gotta go #i hope he *** **** ******** ** *** ***** ** *** **********

#jungkook is so cute i love him so much what the fuck #he is the purest mostwholesome lil fella ive ever seen #his gecko friend :(((( #bitxch #search: how to be a gecko #hes so excited wgdhjb #'this one is a different guy!" #what the actual fuck jungkook rip m heart out y dont u #he saved m life wow #bad day who? dont know her #m never gna b sad again

#oh my god someone get me out of his ass #i'm too far #so far up his ass

#ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm????? #i want him to dropkick me down a flight of stairs

#i want to fuxjckxking die and be dead get this photo away from me #what the ever loving fuck #are you seeing jungkooks arm??? are u seei g it #cause biyxch i am and i choxked #i hope i die #ababsbndnenjabsbsjjsnsl ouc h

#hes like my age in these photos whahat the fuck #why do noboys near me look exactly like this with this exact personality and this exact dna

jimin:

#he looks like a sad puppy and im not having it #ill fight the fucking rain #ill punch a cloud i dont give a fuck 

#i wld step on a lego brick for u

#omg hs lilcrooked tooth #im ugly cryign bitxch #thats it im cryign in th club fr real

#im screamign outta my ass #what the fuck jimin #what kinda extra ass #he did a fuckin split to try and kick a golden glittering pompom #this is gay culture

#he looks like a rich housewife #please step on me

#his fucking n e c k #look at it fuck #what the fuckim..... #im rlly reaching fr th fckng gun sis jesus hcirst

#@nasa i will pay you to launch me into th fckng sun bitxch 

#can he maybe... jump like that again... on m fuckin head 

#i swear hes like... made of gold and honey and stardust or smth what th e fuck

#i literally just said oh my god under m breath #buyt i cldnt get th words right so i just sorta went ohgghg #what the fuck

#this is some chaotic evil behaviour right here what the fuck jimin

#perfection? on my dash? its morelikely than u think!

#i hope i die immediately right now this very second

#can he punch me in th fucking throatplease #i will pay him to straight up fucking deck me

#oh my fucking god im #he #whatthe actual fuck is this?????? #what the fuck is thsi ?!??!?!?! #no #ihave truly had e nough of this shit ajshdbjdbnjfkfl #i become a fckcng jimin stan and this is th shit i get in return???????? #chronic agonising pain #yes thnk u jimin thts rlly what i fuckcing signed up for #this was not part of th fucking contract #i just wanted a cute squishy boy with a lil button nose #n mybe a bit of sad contemplation #i did not want !!!! sin !!!!!! #in my christian household????????? #blasphemy #this is fucking blasphemy #the power of christ compels you #fuck wheres the holy water bitxch #this boysjhdbfjhbfjbjgbjbfbflk #u kno what fuck it if this is what death feels like sign me th fuck up #guess ill just die bitxch

do u ever just look back at your past self and think... is she okay

im tagging: @namjoonsgalaxy @blumiin @minsuga--genius @velvethoseok @hobisnovia @gukiee @itskimtaehyung @parkjiminivan @jiminyoongs (if u want !!)

[blatherkatt]

Title: The Calm Is Terrifying When The Storm Is All You Know [Homestuck]

Prologue 2: Regarding Dave Strider

Summary: There were two kinds of trolls who went to Earth: rich shitheads with too much money and free time, and desperate assholes who couldn’t survive on Alternia, even with the best efforts of the young Condesce. Karkat hated the planet almost immediately, but with his home planet too dangerous for mutants, he really didn’t have any choice but to hide out on this weird little diurnal planet. At least he’d be safe. Or so he thought, right before blundering his way into an accidental friendship with the son of an anti-troll terrorist. 

Rating: M

Chapter Warnings: Death mention, Heavily implied abuse, mentions of terrorist activity (courtesy of Bro Strider), Dave’s mental gymnastics hard at work; So Many Pesterlogs, Illustrated  

FIRST | NEXT 

4/13/2009

(Excerpt from a front page newspaper article)

ALTERNIAN EMBASSY UNDER ATTACK

The Alternian embassy in Austin, Texas suffered a bomb strike yesterday. Several casualties have been recorded. […] Several suspects were seen on video, but as of yet none have been arrested. The primary suspect is a man named Derek Strider. Strider was honored as a hero for his actions during the wars between Alternia and Earth. Strider is currently 33 years old, 6’5”, blonde, pale-skinned, frequently seen wearing an orange baseball cap and triangular sunglasses. Police ask anyone with any information on his whereabouts to please call…

08/05/2011

(Post made to a comedy blog maintained anonymously by one Dirk L.)

The Big Bi-Annual Serious Post(tm).  

Alright, guys. Sorry to be doing this again, but it’s the anniversary, and I’m fucking desperate. To everyone who’s new enough to this blog to have never witnessed my twice-yearly floundering tribute to futility, buckle the fuck up because we’re in for a wild ride.

Yeah, I know, “you were so cute as a child,” et cetera et cetera. Do me a favor and save the patronizing comments on this particular baby photo and instead turn your attention to the little boy on the left. His name is Dave. When this photo was taken, he was six years old; he’s currently a few months shy of thirteen. Assuming he’s still alive, anyway.

I haven’t seen him in six years. Six years ago today, our father came in the dead of night and kidnapped him.

It’s pretty clear at this point that the police have given up on finding him. I haven’t. I’d have to be a pretty shitty older brother to do that, but unfortunately, there’s not much I can do on my own.

All I’m asking is that if you have any word on him, if you know him, if you’ve seen him, if you ran into him in a fucking supermarket, anything at all, please, please tell me. It’s a long shot, I know, but, shit, maybe this weird fucking blog I run can do some good, right?

Let’s skip the usual fucking around, though. Like I said, it’s been six years. I assure you, none of you are the first one to think of the hilarious joke of leading me on and relentlessly fucking with me. It’s not funny, and I’m not in the mood.

Thanks.

(Chatlog from Pesterchum)

— ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 9:15 PM 08/05/2011 —

EB: hey, you’re the guy who runs that weird blog, right?

TT: I run a number of weird blogs. You’ll have to be more specific.

TT: I don’t post my handle on any of them anymore, though, so I’m a bit confused as to how you got it.

EB: got it from my sister! shes been following you for a little while and said you added her recently

EB: she’s gutsygumshoe!

EB: id message you through the actual blog but i mean i dont have a tumblr haha

TT: Ah, okay.

TT: GG’s pretty cool. Knowing she gave you my handle is at least reassuring in the sense that I don’t have to worry so much about who’s getting my contact info.

TT: Why so keen to talk to me, though? It doesn’t sound like you’ve much interest in the contents of the actual blog.

EB: nah its not a sense of humor i feel like i really get

EB: but thats not the point here its actually really important!

EB: see my sis was talking about that post you made today at dinner

EB: she felt really bad for you i guess but she showed it to me and i think i might know dave!

TT: Ah. We’re doing this, okay.

EB: ???

TT: I hope you’ll excuse me not leaping for joy.

TT: There’s been a lot of false alarms over the years. It’s hard to hope.

EB: i mean that might be for the best

EB: im really not sure myself but a lot of weird stuff matches up

EB: the kid in the picture does look a lot like the dave i know and the number of siblings matches up!

TT: Never said that the little girl was my sister.

EB: oh, isn’t she?

EB: that puts a bit of a damper on things if not, because the sister was something he was a lot more sure of.

TT: Um. What?

EB: i should start from the beginning here shouldnt i haha

EB: sorry im a little nervous! and dave isnt online right now because of course he isnt so i cant double check this stuff with him yet ugh

EB: hes like one of my best friends even though weve only met online

EB: the age matches up too! hes twelve right now and turns 13 in a few months

TT: Hm. A bit coincidental, sure, but Dave isn’t exactly a rare name.

EB: he looks a lot like your dave too though!

EB: here look at this

— ectoBiologist sent a file: socool.jpg —

TT: That is the shittiest photo I’ve ever seen.

EB: ugh yeah sorry

EB: he takes them bad on purpose, hes got a really weird sense of humor

EB: thats honestly the best one i have of him right now :(

TT: I can sort of see what you mean by there being a bit of a resemblance, though.

TT: If I squint and tilt my head really hard, I mean.

EB: yeah ok but i mean im still not at the really important part!

EB: see ive known for a while that he lives with his bro

EB: but like a couple weeks ago he told me something really weird!

TT: We’re pretty sure Dave was kidnapped by our father.

TT: I think I’d know if I was living with him.

EB: thats the thing though! his bro isnt actually his brother

EB: hes daves dad

EB: dave isnt sure why the guy makes him call him bro

EB: he told me though that he feels like he does actually have an older brother

EB: cant remember the older brothers name very well, he thinks it starts with a d?

EB: and he remembers having a sister too, and he was like.

EB: absolutely positive her name was rose

EB: wasn’t sure on her age though, he thought she must’ve been pretty close to his age

EB: but i mean if that girl in that photo isn’t your sister then that kinda throws all this right down the drain

TT: She is.

EB: what?

TT: She is my sister. I was…sorry, it was a reflex. I’m so used to people fucking with me over this, I said that to try and throw you off, but

TT: Fuck, my hands are shaking. I hope you’re serious here.

EB: is all that stuff right then??

TT: Her name’s Rose, and she is our sister, and my name does start with a D.

TT: Is there anything else about him that you can tell me that might help identify him?

EB: um

EB: oh! his birthday’s december 3rd!

TT: I

TT: Jesus Christ

EB: :D

EB: ah fuck there he is hold on

EB: asshole finally got online

EB: im gonna show him that post

TT: I

TT: Yeah, you should

TT: Do that.

TT: I’m

TT: Fuck.

EB: oh my god he is rambling up a storm

EB: ive never seen him this excited gosh

EB: do you wanna talk to him? i can give you his handle

TT: Jesus fucking Christ of course I want to talk to him.

TT: Please.

TT: Fuck.

EB: turntechgodhead!

EB: i gave him yours too

EB: you still there dude?

EB: oh i guess you’re probably talking to him now huh haha

— timaeusTestified [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 9:23 PM 08/05/2011 —

TT: Dave?

TG: holy shit

TG: holy shit holy shit i thought i fucking dreamed it all holy shit

TG: im trying to sort all this shit but its all so fucking vague

TG: rose is real though right

TT: She is. You and she are twins.

TG: holy fuck

TG: holy shit im a twin holy fuck

TG: and you too holy shit

TG: i cant fucking remember your name though i dont know whats going on with that

TG: like my brain just decided to pick random details to remember about you all

TG: roses name? sure

TG: the fact that were fucking twins? nope

TG: older brother exists? yeah sure that can stay

TG: his name? hell no

TG: was it dick please tell me its not dick i will throw myself out the fucking window

TT: Dirk, actually.

TG: FUCK

TG: thank fuck im not crazy you guys actually exist jfc

TT: Are you okay?

TG: im the okayest motherfucker this side of the milky way

TG: the fucking siblings i thought i dreamed up actually exists and im talking to one of them

TG: im like if okay took a physical form and that form was the coolest dude who ever fuckin existed

TG: okaying all the fuck over the place

TG: why are you asking thats a weird thing to ask

TT: No, I mean.

TT: Are you…safe, I guess?

TG: uh yeah i guess

TG: this particular motel room doesnt strike me as the cleanest but i mean at least theres no bedbugs this time

TT: You’re in a motel?

TG: yeah weve been moving around a lot lately

TT: I’d imagine so.

TT: According to the news, the old man’s been pretty busy lately.

TG: yyyyyeah

TG: i dont know whats up with that

TG: i mean i know the trolls fuckin invaded us or whatever but i was like a year old when that shit ended

TG: i dunno why he hates them so much

TG: im sure hes got his reasons maybe its all for the best but i kinda want nothing to do with that shit

TT: So you’re not involved in that stuff?

TG: i kinda get the feeling hes building up to dragging me into it but not yet no

TT: Where are you?

TG: didnt get the name of the town but i assume were still in texas

TG: thats where weve been as long as i can remember

TG: excluding the shit i remember from being with you guys

TG: like i guess that might be in texas but the memories dont feel like texas

TG: its a little too you know

TG: not the suns blistering steaming asshole

TG: i mean jesus its fuckin hot here all the time and i swear i have memories of not being miserable from the sun trying to roast us all alive

TT: We’re in upstate New York, actually.

TG: holy shit really

TT: Yeah.

TT: You got really mad once when you found out that there is no literal big apple.

TG: the fuck do you mean once im still pissed

TG: god damn big apple youd expect a place like that to specialize in fuckin aj but no its just a stupid nickname

TG: city of fuckin lies is what it is

TT: Jesus Christ.

TG: sorry except im not

TG: i take my aj fuckin seriously

TT: No, I just

TT: It’s really you, Christ.

TT: This is happening. I’m talking to my baby brother for the first time in six years, and he’s still dorkishly addicted to apple juice.

TG: fuck you aj is the nectar of the gods

TG: shit i gotta go bros back

TT: What? Why?

TG: ill be in touch when i can

TG: bro doesnt want me talking to people online anymore and im not particularly thrilled at the prospect of a strife tonight

TG: see you around

— turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 9:47 PM 08/05/2011 —

TT: Wait, Dave!

TT: Shit.

— timaeusTestified [TT] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 10:15 PM 08/05/2011 —

TT: Thank you.

EB: :B

— timaeusTestified [TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 10:16 PM 08/05/2011 —

08/06/2011

— tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 10:25 AM 08/06/2011 —

TT: Dave, it’s Rose.

— turntechGodhead is offline! —

TT: Thank you, Pesterchum, for confirming the obvious.

TT: I just wanted to make sure you had my contact information as well.

TT: Dirk said he spoke to you yesterday, and I will confess that I am almost afraid to believe him.

TT: It almost hurts to hope, as cliche as that is to say.

TT: But if it’s true, and this really is you, I look forward to at least being able to talk to you again.

— tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 10:30 AM 08/06/2011 —

— turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 10:14 PM 08/06/2011 —

TG: rose holy shit

TG: ok first off lets talk about that fucking username

TG: what the fuck rose

TG: what the actual fuck

TT: Well, there goes any doubt as to your identity I might have had.

TG: the fucks that supposed to mean

TT: I suppose it means that I’ve missed you.

TT: This feels so surreal. Six years with you gone, and here we are, talking.

TT: And you’re the same as ever, somehow.

TG: excuse me im not the one going on the internet as some octopus in a shrink suit

TG: tentacletherapist what the actual fuck

TT: What kind of name is turntechGodhead, then?

TG: a fuckin awesome one is what

TT: Truly, it demonstrates both your nobility and your humility.

TG: you bet your ass it does

TG: the humblest fuckin guy to ever shock the fuckin world with his sick beats

TG: ill rap you under the table and be super not braggy about it

TG: sounds like a fuckin paradox but im just fuckin cool enough to pull it off

TG: be makin people drop like flies with my dope rhymes

TG: everyone be trippin over this sick beat

TG: some guy at the clubs monocle just popped out and socked him in the face

TG: like hey loser why arent you that fuckin awesome and modest

TT: I’m sorry, there’s a man in a suit and a monocle at this hypothetical club?

TG: well it wasnt a club to start with

TG: just some fancy dudes all bein posh and shit

TG: but i walked in and its a fuckin party now

TG: i didnt even have to start rappin i just set foot in the place and it all lights the fuck up

TG: glowsticks are popping into existence to get the rave going and half the posh dudes immediately start fuckin grinding

TG: and im like yo i only wanted to grab one of your weird sandwiches and leave but yall gotta be like this

TG: cant a guy just go somewhere without the party starting on me

TT: How dreadful it must be, to be such a majestic being!

TG: its a curse i must bear

TG: heavy is the crown

TT: I’m sorry to change the subject to something very strange, but I have an odd favor to ask.

TG: yeah shoot

TT: Your friend, John, provided one of your “ironic selfies” to Dirk to try and confirm your identity to him.

TT: Would it be possible to get one with the irony turned down a few notches?

TT: And possibly minus the shades?

TG: woah what why

TT: It’s…

TT: Our mother misses you too, Dave. She’s been devastated ever since we lost you.

TG: oh

TT: I think it would do her some good to at least know what you look like, now.

TT: The only existing pictures of you we have are so old.

TG: yeah

TG: yeah i can do that hold up

— turntechGodhead sent a file: boringasfuckselfie.jpg —

TT: Thank you.

TT: Here’s a recent picture of myself and Dirk, by the by.

TT: Fair trade.

— tentacleTherapist sent a file: EquallyBoring.jpg —

TG: well shit

TG: dirks hair somehow got even more bullshit anime

TG: i thought i was definitely fucking imagining that part but nope

TT: It is pretty bullshit.

TT: He goes through a lot of hair gel.

TG: hahahaha

TG: rose

TG: rose hey rose

TT: I’m still here, Dave. What is it?

TG: rose were twins

TT: We are, yes.

TG: im still fucking losing it over that okay

TG: bro never fuckin talks about you guys and he got mad at me for asking too much years back so i stopped

TG: but i swear ive always had this feeling like i definitely wasnt an only child and i remembered you strongest

TG: dont tell dirk that but i did

TG: its like

TG: i was so sure i musta dreamed you guys up but youre real and i have a twin im a fuckin twin rose

TT: While I can’t completely relate, as our mother never made any secret of your existence and Dirk remembered you quite clearly, I can at least connect to the surrealism of this experience.

TT: I’m almost afraid I’m going to wake up and be left bereft.

TG: fuck i wanna keep talking but bros gonna be home any minute

TT: Do you need to sign off for the night?

TG: yeah

TG: dont wanna get in trouble

TG: i am pretty much directly disobeying him right now

TT: Any idea when you’ll  be able to get online next?

TG: no

TG: ill talk to you whenever im on though

TT: Take care.

TG: you too

TG: miss you like hell

— turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 11:25 PM 08/06/2011 —

12/03/2011

— turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 10:45 PM 12/03/2011 —

— TG sent TT a file: happyfuckignbIRTH.gif —

TT: The sentiment is appreciated, but you’re a day early.

TG: what

TG: but

TG: were twins

TG: its my birthday

TT: Yes, well.

TT: You managed to claw your way into the world thirteen minutes before I did.

TT: And as it just so happens, that thirteen minute period straddled the chiming of midnight.

TT: As such, your birthday is technically the day before mine.

TG: wait im the older twin

TG: holy shit i didnt see that coming

TT: I don’t see how it matters very much.

TG: now listen here you whippersnapper

TT: Hush.

TG: as much as id love to lord it up i really cant talk much

TG: im pretty much just droppin that file and running

TT: Well, before you go.

TT: I’ve no such masterpiece prepared, myself, but.

TT: I hope you’ve had a happy birthday.

TG: eh its been alright i guess

TG: enjoy your early present you lucky motherfucker i gotta go

— turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 10:47 PM 12/03/2011 —

12/15/2011

— turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 11:29 PM 12/15/2011 —

TG: dirk

TG: dude are you there it says youre online but im pretty sure its like

TG: after midnight where you are

TT: About half an hour before, actually.

TG: thank fuck

TT: What’s up?

TG: remember how i said back when we first talked that bro wasnt making me tag along with his fuckin

TG: weird bullshit fight the trolls business

TT: Has that changed?

TG: he made me help him yesterday

TG: im still fuckin shaking i dont know what to do

TG: im sure hes got whatever reasons for doing this shit but i cant

TG: he killed some of them dirk

TG: i watched people die yesterday i dont know what to do

TG: i dont wanna fuckin hurt anyone even if they are aliens

TT: We need to get you the fuck out of there.

TT: Is there any way you can get away from him? I can look up bus schedules, or, shit, hit up the blogs and see if anyone can drive you up here.

TG: dude no

TG: im freakin out but i cant fuckin abandon him hes still family

TT: Dave, he kidnapped you. You realize that, right?

TG: what

TT: He has no legal custody over you.

TG: hes my dad though

TT: He’s a man with no legal rights to your care, who is now actively forcing you to participate in acts of incredible violence against an entire group of people.

TT: That’s fucked up, even if they did technically invade us, once.

TG: dude no its

TG: im fine i just needed to talk to someone and rose is offline

TT: She’s asleep.

TT: I’m not budging on this, though.

TT: You need to get the fuck out of there. He’s going to get you killed.

TG: i can protect my fuckin self thanks

TG: i dont wanna kill anyone but that doesnt mean i cant fight fuck you

TT: That’s not what I meant.

— turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 11:57 PM 12/15/2011 —

05/15/2012

— turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 9:13 PM 05/14/2012 —

TG: hey are you awake

GG: :o

GG: i think i should be asking you that mr night owl!

GG: isnt it like three in the morning where you are?

TG: sleep is for the weak

TG: and for weird girls with medical conditions i guess

GG: hehe

GG: what have you even been up to lately? i havent heard from you in like a week and you talk to me super late!

TG: yeah sorry bros had me busy

TG: doing

TG: stuff

TG: you know what lets not talk about that

TG: as you pointed out it is the asscrack of the morning out here

TG: if im gonna be awake anyway im not spending it talking about that bullshit

GG: has he been running you ragged again? thats awful!

TG: alright fuck well i guess we are talking about it

TG: hes not

TG: putting me at the front of things anymore thank fuck

TG: i think he just gave up on trying to make me do some of the really intense shit at least for now

TG: but hes still expecting me to do shit behind the scenes

TG: cut power

TG: sneak in and unlock doors

TG: shit like that

TG: and hes been watching me like a fuckin hawk i havent been able to get online at all until now so thats why ive been absent

GG: :(

GG: well im glad to hear from you even if it is really late!

TG: yeah

TG: ass o clock or not its nice to fuckin

TG: just talk to someone for a while

TG: dunno why bros gotta be such an asshole i mean i know hes paranoid about us getting caught but its not like the police are gonna have any fuckin idea my shitty pesterchum account is related to the stuff hes doing

TG: like fuck off dude let me talk to my friends

GG: yeah!! >:B

TG: so hey on this latest mission i saw a dude in a fursuit and thought of you

TG: theres no conventions going on right now that im aware of or anything he just decided he was gonna walk around in a fucking animal suit

TG: was the most surreal thing i saw today

TG: and i literally see aliens on a pretty regular fucking basis so thats saying a lot

GG: pfft!

GG: dave i told you i have no interest in fursuits

TG: yeah i know youre too hardcore furry to be able to settle for something like that

TG: you weirdo

GG: says the guy who collects dead things

TG: shut up my dead shit collection is certified off the wall amazing

TG: had an expert in awesome things come by and personally give me the certificate

TG: showed up and went holy shit

TG: thats a rad ass collection of dead shit

TG: heres your certificate let me grovel at your feet

TG: let me bow before its magnificence

GG: lol dave

GG: it is pretty awesome but it is weird too!

GG: the two are not mutually exclusive silly

GG: …dave?

GG: it says you’ve been typing for like twenty minutes now :o

—turntechGodhead [TG] is an idle chum! —

GG: dave??

GG: are you okay?

GG: did you fall asleep?

GG: thats really cute if you did but you need to be careful!

GG: your bros gonna be really mad if he catches you talking to me

GG: …….he didnt catch you did he?

GG: dave?????

— turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 10:25 PM 05/14/2012 —

GG: oh no

— turntechGodhead [TG] is offline! —

GG: D:

06/23/2012

—timaeusTestified [TT] began pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC] at 3:17 PM 06/23/2012 —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: EB1.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: socool.jpg —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Dirk1.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Dirk2.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Dirk3.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Rose1.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: boringasfuckselfie.jpg —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: EquallyBoring.jpg —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Rose2.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Rose3.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Rose4.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Rose5.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/Rose6.txt —

— timaeusTestified sent a file: TG/GG1.txt —

TT: There’s everything Rose and I have been able to scrounge up between the two of us, plus gardenGnostic’s last conversation with him.

TT: She was the last person to talk to him.

TT: EB and GG are both going to see if they have any other logs saved with him. I can send them to you, or they can send them directly.

TT: They might have more than me or Rose. They’ve both known Dave since he was ten, apparently.

GC: 4LR1GHT

GC: G1V3 M3 4 B1T TO R34D THROUGH TH3S3

GC: 1M GO1NG TO H4V3 TO H4V3 MY COMPUT3R GUY GO 1NTO YOUR 4CCOUNTS TO V3R1FY TH4T TH3S3 4R3 L3G1T

TT: That’s fine.

TT: I mean, I can’t speak for GG or EB, but I don’t have a problem with it.

TT: Are you going to be able to get at the existing police files on him?

TT: This whole business with the old man meant that we couldn’t get the police to take any of this stuff when it was going on. They just said that there was nothing they could do.

TT: Out of their hands, they said.

TT: And apparently the people whose hands it was in didn’t particularly care about Dave’s involvement.

GC: Y34H, MOST OF TH3 TROLLS UP 4T TH3 TOP WH3N 1T COM3S TO 1NT3RSP3C13S CR1M1N4L PROC33D1NGS DONT R34LLY G3T YOUR W31RD HUM4N F4M1LY UN1TS

GC: OR HOW S3R1OUSLY YOU GUYS T4K3 PROT3CT1NG YOUR YOUNG

GC: 1 M34N 1 DONT R34LLY G3T 1T 31TH3R

GC: 1T DO3SNT M4K3 MUCH S3NS3 TO M3

GC: BUT 4T L34ST 1 K33P 1N M1ND TH4T 1T 1S 4CTU4LLY 4 TH1NG

GC: 1 M34N G33Z

GC: SOM3ON3 H3R3 N33DS TO B3 CULTUR4LLY S3NS1T1V3

GC: 4LL JOK1NG 4SID3

GC: DONT YOU WORRY 1 W1LL F1ND 4 W4Y TO G3T 4T THOS3 F1L3S WH3TH3R TH3 H1GH3R UPS W4NT M3 TO OR NOT >:]

TT: Sounds like the legends are true, then.

GC: L3G3NDS?

TT: Word on the street is that you’re something of a bloodhound.

TT: That you don’t give up on a case you’ve taken, no matter how little you have to work with or how bad it gets.

GC: H3H3H3H3H3H3

TT: That’s why I brought this to you.

TT: Everyone else has given up on Dave, it seems.

TT: You’re the best hope we’ve got of finding him, at this point. Thank you for that, by the way.

GC: 1 M34N

GC: DONT G3T M3 WRONG, YOU BROUGHT M3 1NTO TH1S FOR A SP3C1F1C PURPOS3 4ND 1 1NT3ND TO S33 TH4T PURPOS3 THROUGH

GC: BUT MY PR1M4RY GO4L H3R3 IS TO G3T MY B1G BR34K

GC: TH1S 1S 4 R34LLY GOOD 4NGL3 TO H4V3 ON TH3 STR1D3R C4SE

GC: 4ND 1 4M CR4CK1NG 1T OP3N 4ND M4K1NG MY M4RK

TT: Yeah, I know.

TT: I’m not under any sort of illusions here. You’ve got your own ulterior motives for taking this case, especially considering we’re basically paying you on the combined allowances of two literal children.

TT: That doesn’t change the fact that you’re still the first person outside our family to put serious effort into finding Dave in a long time.

TT: Ulterior motives or not,

TT: That’s a really big deal to us.

TT: So, again: Thank you.

GC: >:]

GC: 4LR1GHT TH4TS 3NOUGH B31NG S4PPY

GC: 1 GOT 4 JOB TO DO

GC: 1 W1LL TRY TO K33P YOU POSTED

— gallowsCallibrator [GC] ceased trolling timaeusTestified [TT] —

[no-this-is-sin-blog]

400 QUESTIONS!

C1. Name: Mady 2. Nickname(s): Two-Bit, Madster, Mads, and (by my teachers) STOP DRAWING! 3. Birthday: April 19, 4. That makes you (age): an age 5. Where were you born (city): Albuquerque, New Mexico 6. Location right now (planet ): Earth 7. Shoe size: US Women's size 9 wide 8. How many piercings?: two and my ears 9. Tattoos?: nope 10. When you wake up you're: cold and tired 11. When you're about to sleep you're: awake 12. Zodiac sign: Aries/Taurus (CUSP) 13. Moon Sign: Taurus 14. Righty or Lefty: Righty 15. Innie or Outie: Innie 16. School: hell

Section Two: Looks

17. Nationality: European American 18. Hair colour: ginger in some light, brown in another lighting. 20. Weight: (uncomfortable subject) 21. Height: 5′ 11′‘ 22. Braces? Yep 23. Glasses? contacts

Section Three: Private Life

24. Do you have a boy/girlfriend? Nope 25. If so, who? Nobody 26. If not, do you have a crush on someone? yeah 27. Who has a crush on you? some creep in my grade 28. Ever cheated on your bf/gf? no 29. Who was your first kiss: some guy named Jack in kindergarten 30. Who was your last kiss: no one ;( 31. Are you a virgin? yes 32. Ever had a threesome before? no 33. NQ- Every been swarmed by ladybugs?: no 34. Have you ever been in love? yes 35. Broken any hearts? yeah that creep in my grade 36. Got your heart broken?  yes 37. Ever liked a friend? yes 38. What happened? they’re either dating someone or not into girls

Section Four: Past Relationships

39. How many relationships have you been in? Two 40. How many were serious enough to count: One 41. Who were those serious ones: My friend K9 42. NQ- Who used to be your best friend: Some girl who I’m gonna call So 43. What made them different: They were weird like me. 44. What happened: I grew up, she didn't. 45. FRIENDSHIP Best boy/girlfriend: Dani or Aye (Not real names, none of the names are real) 46. FRIENDSHIP Worst boy/girlfriend: So or Ant 47. Ever been kissed: Yes 48. Who do you want back: Princess 49. Who do you regret: Doing so much dumb shit 50. Why?: cause it ruined me emotionally

Section Five: Favourites

51. Song: Lana Del Rey - Cherry 52. Movie: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban 53. Food: Sushi 54. Drink: Blueberry Ice Tea (with honey and frozen blueberries) 55. Store: Walgreens 56. Television show: Eyewitness 57. Holiday: Samhain or Yuletide 58. Book: Witch Child 59. Ice cream: Honey Lavander 60. Sweets: Chocolate 61. Crisps: with fish 62. Type of music: indie or pop or rap 63. Artist: Lana Del Rey, Atlas, Samsa, and The 1975 64. Word: Brittle 65. Time of day: Lunch Time 66. Dressing: Vinegar 67. Alcoholic drink: Whiskey 68. Colour(s): Green and Grey 69. Piece of clothing: My Jean Jacket or Sunflower Jumer 70. Character: Sirius Black 71. Smell: Candle Smoke 72. Shampoo: Pantene 73. Soap: Rainbath 74. Smiley: The weird upside down one 75. Board game: Monopoly 76. Sport: Quidditch 77. Number: 7 78. Quote: "Everything is a choice" Tom Hiddleston 79. Animal(s): Cats, Bearded Dragons, Racoons, and Squirellles 80. Actor(s): Tom Hiddleston, Chris Hemsworth, Emma Watson, Tom Felton, Matt Dillon, Rob Lowe, Patrick Swayze, 82. Vegetable: Carrot 83. Fruit: Rambutan 84. Place to be: My room 85. Thing in your room: My altar 86. Gum: 5Gum 87. Shape: Stellated Icosahedron 88. Country: Europe 89. Mall: Outlet 90. Car: Subaru 91. Boy's name: Tobias or  Montgomery 92. Girl's name: Cassiopeia or Petra 93. Family member: My mom 94. Restaurant: Red Robin 95. Movie place: Regal 96. Person to go to the movies with: my friends 97. Noise: Cats meowing 98. Brand of shoe: anything off brand 99. Brand of clothing: anything from a thrift store 100. Body part of a chicken: Boob 101. Swear word: Bitch 102. Month: April 103. Possession: My books 104. Team: Fuck sports 105. Season: Autumn 106. Radio station: 92.5 107. Magazine: Ew 108. Favourite grade: 8th 109. Least favourite grade: 6th 110. Teacher: Ms. Veraya 111. Least favourite teacher: Mr. Shipp (Mr. Shit) 112. Subject: English or Art 113. Subject to talk about: ALL

Section Six: Family

114. Who's your mum?: Noel 115. Who's your dad?: Brian 116. Any step-parents?: nopee 117. Any brothers?: Zac 118. Any Sisters?: nopers 120. Coolest: My mum 121. Loudest: my dad 122. Best relative: my mom 123. Worse relative: my cousin Marilyn 124. Do you get along with your parents? My mom yes, my dad no 125. With your siblings? ehh 126. Does anyone understand you? yeah to an extent 127. Do you have any pets?:  yes 128. If so, what kind and name? 3 Cats: Button (Mister) (Fluffy Tux), Shadow (Shamu) (Short Hair Tux), and Ginger (Loki) (Tortoise Shel). 2 Dogs: Thor and Ruby, both are yellow labs, and a fuck ton of fish 129. If not, what do you want as a pet?:

Section Seven: School

131. Are you still in school? Si 132. Did you drop out?: Nah 133. Your current GPA: Probably a C average like 2.0 Idk 134. Do you buy or bring lunch?: Buy 135. ABC's?: Yes 136. Favorite class: English 137. Play any sports at school?: Nahh 138. Are you popular? Noppe 139. Favourite memory: When my friend Dani hugs me (she's such a non-touchy person that when she does its like HOLY FUCC IM SO SPECIAL) 140. Most humiliating moment: A lot 141. Most funniest moment: When my friend Aiden fell on his ass while riding his Heelys 142. Most scared moment: Every. Time. I. Get. A. Test. Back

Section Eight: What do you think of when you hear

145. Chicken: Flap Flap Flap 146. Dog: Woof 147. Christina Aguilera: uh 148. Ricky Martin: whom? 149. 50 cent: No 150. Poop: ew 151. Beach: pretty 152. Desert: Sand 153. Water: Ponyo 154. Osama: Bin Laden 155. Love: need 156. Your little brother: shh 157. Butt: Booty 158. Clowns: No 159. Wonder: Imagine 16o. Brown: Earth 161. Banana: Gross 162. Sex: Mhhhmhmh 163. Parents: 1/2 164. Homosexuals: My friends 165. God: Loki

Section Nine: Do you believe in

166. God: Loki 167. Heaven: Ehhh 168. Devil: Hel 169. Hell: Helheim 170: Boogyman: ehh 171. Closet Monsters: Ghosties 172. Fortune tellings: Sure 173. Magic: Yeah 174. Love at first sight: If it happens it happens 175. Ghosts: Yes 176. Voo-doo dolls: Yes 177. Reincarnation: Yes 178. Yourself: EH

Section Ten: Do you

179. Smoke: no 180. Do drugs: once or twice 181. Drink alcohol: no 182. Cuss: YES 183. Sing in the shower: yes 184. Like school: to an extent 185. Want to get married: yes 186. Type with all of your fingers: yes 187. Think you're attractive: no and yes 188. Drink and drive: no 189. Snore: no 190. Sleepwalk: no 191. Like watching sunrises and sunsets: yes

Section Eleven: Have you ever

192. Flashed someone: yes 193. Gotten so drunk til you threw up everywhere: no 194. Told that person how you felt: no... 195. Been arrested: no 196. Gone to jail or Juve: no 197. Skateboarded: yes 198. Skinny dipped: no 199. Rock climbed: yes 200. Killed someone: no... 201. Watched porn: yes 202. Gone on a road trip: yes 203. Went out of the country: no 204. Talked back to an adult: yEs 205. Broken a law: yes 206. Got pulled over: no 208: Cried to get out of trouble: yes 209. Let a friend cry on your shoulder: yes 210. Kissed a brother's or sister's friend: no 211. Kissed a friend's brother or sister: no 212. Dropped something on the floor and let someone eat it anyways: yes 213. Moon someone: no 214. Shop-lifted: yes 215. Worked at McDonald's: no 216. Eaten a dog: noo 217. Give money to a homeless person: yes 218. Glued your hand to yourself:   yes 219. Kissed someone of the same sex: yes 220. Had a one night stand: no 221. Smoked: yes 222. Done drugs: yes 223. Lose a friend because of your ex: no 224. Slap someone for being stupid: yes 225. Had cyber sex: no. 226. Wish you were the opposite sex: no 227. Caught someone doing something: yes 228. Played a game that removes clothing: yes 229. Cried during a movie: YES 230. Cried over someone: YES 231. Wanted to hook up with a friend: ye 232. Hooked up with someone you barely met: no 233. Ran away from home: yes 234. Cheated on a test: yes

Section Twelve: Would you

235. Bungee jump: HELL YEAH 236. Skydive: YES 237. Swim with dolphins: HELL FUCKIN YEAH 238. Steal a friend's bf or gf: nah 239. Try to be the opposite sex: yeah 240. Lie to the police: yes 241. Run from the police: yeah 242. Lie to your parents: yes 243. Backstab a friend for your own well being: no 244. Be an exotic dancer: yes 245. NQ- Kill the president: Yes...

Section Thirteen: Are you

246. Shy: yes 247. Loud: yes 248. Nice: yes 249: Outgoing:. depends 250: Quiet: yes 251. Mean: yes 252. Emotional: yes 253. Sensitive: yes 254. Gay: Pan 255. Strong: yeah 256. Weak:  yes 257. Caring: yes 258. Dangerous: when it need be 259. Crazy: yeah 260. Spontaneous: yes 261. Funny: yes 262. Sweet: yes 263. Sharing:. si 264. Responsible: ehhh 265. Trustworthy: yeah 266. Open-minded: yes 267. Creative: yes 268. Cute:. I hope so 269. Slick: kinda 270. Smart: yeah 271. Dumb: yeah 272. Evil: eh 273. Ghetto: kind of 274. Classy:  depends on the situation 275. Photogenic: NO 276. Dependable: yeah 277. Greedy: depends on what is at hand 278. Ugly: to myself yes 279. Messy: yes 280. Neat: depends 281. Perverted: Nah 282. Silly: yea 283. A B****: yes 284. A Good Listener: yes 285. A Fighter: yes 286. A Party Animal: Nah 287. A Game Freak: Nah 288. A Computer Freak: Nah

Section Fourteen: Future

289. Dream job: writer 290. Dream house: a small cottage (if I have no kids) or an apartment 291. Husband/Wife: someone really cool, ya know nice, and not psychotic 292. Kids: 2-3 293. Names: OHH I have nameees so If I have girls I want their names to be Cassiopeia, Petra, and or Alexis, and if I have boys I want their names to be Montgomery, Tobias, and or Blake 294. Pets: Cats and or a bearded dragon 295. Car: a green Subaru 296. Age you would want to get married: like 27 or 30? 297. Best Man/Bride's Maid: My friend Dani 298. Honeymoon: Germany

Section Fifteen: Your friends

299. Best friend: Dani 300. Known the longest: k9 301. Craziest: Simon 302. Loudest: Simon 303. Shyest: Simon 304. Best hair: Dani 305. Best eyes: k9 306. Best body: Dani 307. Most Athletic: Dani 308. Hot-Tempered: Simon 309. Most impatient: Simon 310. Shortest: k9 311. Tallest: me (or Simon) 312. Skinniest: Dani 313. Best singer: Dani 314. Funniest: Dani 315. Can always make you laugh: Dani 316. Wish you talked to more: Dani 317. Wish you saw more: Dani 318. Who drives you insane after a while: Simon 319. Who you can stay around forever and never get sick of: Dani 320. Ever lose a friend because you took it to the 'next level': No 321. Whose always been there when you need them: Dani or k9 322. Who is like your family: k9 323. How many friends do you have?: 8 who are kinda close 324. How many are really close? four (Dani, Simon, k9, and Kens

Section Sixteen: The last

325. Thing you ate: Salad 326. Thing you drank: Seltzer Water 327. Thing you wore: A 70's Sunflower jumper and leggings 328. Thing you did:  typed 329. Place you went: School 330. Thing you got pierced or tattooed: Ears 331. Person you saw: My mom 332. Person you hugged: Dani 333. Person you kissed: No 334. NQ- Person you beat to a juicy pulp: noone 335. Person you talked to online: Simon 336. Person you talked to on the phone: k9 337. Song you heard: Diet MTN Dew - Lana Del Rey 338. Show you saw: Star V.S. The Forces of Evil 339. Time you fought with your parents: like yesterday 340. Time you fought with a friend: almost never 341. Words you said: fuck science

Section Seventeen: Now

343. What are you eating: air 344. What are you drinking: air 345. What are you thinking: i don't want to finish my homework 346. What are you wearing: clothes 347. What are you doing: typing 349. Hair: weird 350. Mood: eh 351. Listening to: music 352. Talking to anyone: no 353. Watching anything: music

Section Eighteen: Yes or No

354. Are you a vegetarian: i try to be pescatarian 355. Are you a carnivore: no 356. Are you heterosexual: no 357. Do you like penguins: Yes 358. Do you write poetry: sometimes 359. Do you see stupid people: yes 360. You + Me: whom 361. Do you like the Osbournes: no? 362. Can you see flying pigs: yes 363. Do you sleep with stuffed animals on your bed: yes 364. Are you from Afghanistan: no 365. Is Christina Aguilera ugly: no 366. Are you a zombie: yes 367. Am I annoying you: no 368. Do you bite your nails: yes 369. Can you cross your eyes: yes 370. Do you make your bed in the morning: yes 371. Have you touched someone's private part: yes

Section Nineteen: This or That

372. Winter or Summer: Summer 373. Spring or Autumn: Spring 374. Shakira or Britney: Shakira 375. MTV or VH1: ???? 376. Black or White: Black 377. Yellow or Pink: Yellow 378. Football or Basketball: Football 379. Mobile Phone or Pager: Phone 380. Pen or Pencil: Pencil 381. Cold or Hot: Cold 382. Tattoos or Piercings: Tattoos 383. Inside or Outside: Outside 384. Weed or Alcohol: Weed 385. Coke or Pepsi: Both 386. Tape or Glue: Glue 387. McDonald's or In-n-Out: In-n-Out

Section Twenty: Opinions

388. What do you think about classical music: okay 389. About boy bands: sure 390. About suicide: please try and get help 391. About people who try to force their opinions on you: fuk off 392. About teen pregnancy: stop 393. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years: dead? 394. Who do you think you'll still be friends within 5 years: Dani or Kens 395. About gay men: queens

Section Twenty-One:

396. Do you have a website: no 397. Current weather right now: rain 398. Current time:  8:50 pm 399. Any shout outs: @flower-in-the-ashes 400. Last thoughts: help me

[tumblunni]

What do you guys think about the names Dustin and Darcy for my protagonists in Let's Go?

Cos i really wanted to play the co op mode thing by myself, just so i can pretend this role in the plot is filled by two siblings and have a bit of fun roleplaying that. But i dunno yet how the co-op works and whether you'd be able to customize the avatar of the second player or if its just the default trainer? Or can you only play co-op if you have two separate games? Im planning to buy the other version anyway once i get more money, so it could be fun to play my first version with sibling one and then the second playthru is sibling two's turn to shine!

Oh and the whole reason i wanted to do this is cos i wanna try out the customization features to make some ocs now that there's no competitive online stuff unless you pay a subscription fee (LOL NO THANKS). Like..i always felt like i HAD to make my character me in xy/sumo/usum, otherwise its like lying online? But of course i cant actually make me because theres no nonbinary option or even remotely ambiguous outfits for either gender. And you cant have wild hair colours while i dye my hair 24/7 irl lol. Its silly cos like 95% of the gym leaders and other characters ingame have anime hair colours yet the player has to be normal? So yeah i cpuldnt really enjoy making this innacurate defanged version of myself yet i didnt feel like i was allowed to just make up a new character either. Closest i could do was give myself white hair like my old trainersona when i was 12, lol. I mean i guess thats my 'real hair colour' underneath the dye right now, if you think about it that way?

OH GOD PIKACHU CAN HAVE A LITTLE TUXEDO AND BOWLER HAT HOLY FUCK IM SORRY TO INTERRUPT THIS BUT I WAS WATCHING THE IGN REVIEW AND THEY SHOWED PIKA BOWLER HAT PLEASE GO GOOGLE THAT VIDEO JUST FOR THAT 1 SECOND OF NEW FOOTAGE OF MY BEAUTIFUL CLASSY BOYE

okay where was i

Yeah! I think sibling trainers could be a good and unique way to handle a rival! Like having them be your sibling already establishes that rivalry. But it can be a soft and nice rivalry! I wanna go with that fun version rather than the full on angry exaggerated sibling rivalries you often see in kids media. Like i know that some people legit dont get on with their siblings and some people can even have a very gary esque full on rivalry thats sorta 'love to hate' or like..tsundere pretending you hate them. But personally i never had experience with that, i can never relate to those 'tfw u hate ur sibling and theyre always an asshole but lolll u love them anyway' posts. I only got to live with my little sister for a little while due to the catastrophe of abusive parenthood that was my childhood, and i lost contact with her forever when she was very young so i doubt she'd even remember me. *sigh* But like i don't think i only love her so much because i miss her! People say newborns and toddlers are the most bratty so like you'd think if i was gonna ever find her 'annoying' i would have done it back then. I was always just mega proud of her and whenever she'd be 'bratty' i'd be cheering her on and trying to protect her from mom. And when she'd try and pull pranks on me or practise play-fighting or whatever i was just like 'lol thats legit funny' and taking play-falls so she felt better about herself. Like we didnt have much power in that household so i felt like encouraging her pretending to be a wrestler would help her feel like she had some sort of control in some part of her life i guess? And just i wished i was allowed to roughhouse and run around and be all 'unladylike' and just enjoy BEING A KID when i was a kid, yknow? I always had legit fun being with her and legit enjoyed it and was legit proud and legit never annoyed. I just dont understand 'yeah she's annoying but i love her anyway'. I was only ever her rival as a play-rival to help encourage her to like.. Enjoy the things she enjoyed. Feel like someone else cared. I only ever acted like 'ha ha baby stuff yeah sure i hate hanging out with my sister" cos i thought i was SUPPOSED TO. I always felt so guilty doing it and so dissappointed cos id rather hang out with her than be a boring stereotypical teen tbh. I dunno, maybe this isnt typical for siblings and its just a sign of how badly we were raised? I was just real fuckin lonely and absolutely loved having a family member who loved me for the first time since my grandma died. Same reason i always used to act all 'i am too cool i totally am not soft for my lil sister' around my lil sister's dad. I really wanted him to love me too! I used to say swear words at him cos i thougjt he would thibk i was Cool And Adult?? I have soooo many cringe moments from that phase of my childhood. Man it hurts to think that i never actually did get to become that positive influence that protected my sister from my mum and let her know she was loved. Cos i was sent to live with my dad when she was like 5ish? And never saw her again and now im too scared to try and reach out to her again because 1: she probably doesnt even remember me, 2: theres a chance she believes my mum saying i was some horrible asshole who abandoned the family, 3: even bigger chance that contacting her could mean my mum finding me again and big fuckin risk of further abuse. Plus the awkwardness of introducing my trans self when she'd remember me as her sister and all. Sigh! All i can do is hope that her cool dad eventually got custody of her, and that he didnt turn out to be a secret bastard like when i met my own dad. He seemed good, but then again i was just a lil kid and my dad seemed good at first. Sighhhhhh...

SO UMM YEAH WOW I MADE MYSELF SAD

Anyway the point is that whenever i write siblings i'd rather write 100% unapologetic super loving love cos its wish fullfillment for me. This is also why in/cest shipping is a massive beserk button for me, good wholesome family relationships are REAL FUCKIN IMPORTANT and how DARE you corrupt that shit! Some people would fuckin KILL to have that wholesome family!!

Anyway lol thats why i'd like a Wholesome Rivalry for these sibling ocs! Like they challenge each other to contests along the way just for fun, and they react all 'wow my sis is the BEST' when you beat them, so hard feelings at all. And you dont JUST do rival stuff but also sometimes just hang out and have fun cos you missed each other. And if anyone threatens your sibling then THAT is the only time you see the Serious Sibling Power! Rival moments: ha ha lol bet ya cant beat me ooo im a scary villain LOL I CANT KEEP A STRAIGHT FACE HAHA! Giovanni punches your brother: *stony cold death glare from hell as tricksy prank sis turns into an unstoppable vengeance engine* Oh, but also the only other time they'd be serious is in their final battle together! Like most of the 'rivalry' is just competing to make the adventure fun and to help each other get stronger. But if sis/bro ever actually legit said they really want to fight to find out who's the best, and its like..important to help their self confidence, then i think bro/sis would respect that and go all out. Taking a fall and letting them win would be the most disrespectful thing of all! Oh, but i do think there would be one kind of battle like that during the story? Like in one of the more low stakes faux-rival fights the sibling actually does try and let you win, and the challenge is to try and lose against all odds. High stakes super failure battle!!! Imagine the evil team in the background like 'wtf' as these two run the most aggressively slow race of all time! XD

Oh and i kinda thought about different personalities for the two of them based on who you pick? Like i did like that aspect about brendan/may in RSE compared to other 'unpicked option becomes rival' characters in later games that didnt even have one personality let alone two. It just sucks that the personalities they decided to give them were 'female rival is super self concious and thinks youre better than her because youre a boy' and 'male rival is super ego and thinks he's better than you because he's a boy'. Boooo!

So instead of that the personalities i was thinking for these two would be less sexist lol. Male sibling Dustin is basically Wally so far? I need to develop him a bit more to make him a bit distinct, i mean its not like every single shy dude is identical. I'm thinking maybe mix him with all the wasted potential in Brendan? Like in the game they slightly hint at him having the ONE non stereotypical trait of liking cute teddy bears, and that made me think about how much better his whole plot would have been if it actually criticized his sexism and said that he only behaves that way cos he's overcompensating for being bullied for being 'feminine', yknow? And then in the manga they actually DO write him as super feminine, and even as a contest star who loves fashion and dressing up his pokemon! But then GAHHH they present it as some sort of fuckin 'character flaw', like he's shown to be selfish and superficial because of it. And the backstory is that him and the female protagonist used to be 'normal' until a traumatic event. Brendan was a Natural Fighting Prodigy until he saved his female friend from a wild pokemon and was so traumatized that he never wanted to fight again, while she wanted to learn to fight so she'd never need to be protected again. But this is not only presented as Wrong Ways To Be Gender but also like.. Fighting their natural instinct which still comes through?? Like male protag hasnt fought in YEARS yet whenever he's forced to fight he's just magically better at it than female protag who's been practising all these years to become his equal. Ha ha silly girl you can never achieve that! All you get is this patronizing 'well if you just tryyyyy girly things im sure you'll like it' plot and then you get rescued by him in the end because OF COURSE you do. Sigh! I cant believe they made me hate that pairing even more than the games did! So yeah i dont really wanna write Dustin as a jerkass who's secretly got synpathetic motives of internalized homophobia/sexism, cos i feel thats a plot very specific to my perceptuons of Brendan and id basically just have to make Dustin a clone of him and he wouldnt be able to shine on his own merits. Instead i'm just thinking of writing him as a 100% sensitive soul, and he still faces predjudice for not being that bigoted idea of an 'ideal man' but really the fact he doesnt bow down to their demands proves that he's the bravest person here.

And then I'm thinking maybe the female sibling Darcy is the older one and is a bit "gary ish"? Like eitjer way you still have a friendly and loving siblingness, but she's a bit more of a sass who is tsundere about admitting she loves her bro. But i dont think she's the cold or grumpy sort of tsundere, more like a trickstery tomboy? Bombastic loki jock sis! She can only be a bit abrasive with her bro cos she wants to teach him to be tough even when she's not there to protect him. But sometimes she can mess it up and make him feel like he has to change his personality in order to be tough, rather than letting him know she supports him in being "unmasculine" and just wants to help him find the confidence to stand up to people who bully him for it. Like she feels like she is 'weaker' than him in the sense that she worries too much about what people will think if she expresses her real emotions, yknow? Like theyre both suffering from toxic masculinity! He's suffering from the standard form where men who are too 'soft' are beaten down into that mould. Ans she's suffering from the problem where 'masculine' girls feel like they have to be '100% masculine' in order to be allowed to be themselves at all. Like back when i was a kid and before i came out as trans i always used to try and pretend to like sports ans like..cliche macho shit where you Cant Admit You Care About Your Friends and also i wasnt allowed to like ANY feminine things at all. I had to either follow the stereotype of femininity entirely or follow the opposite stereotype, i wasnt allowed to just reject stereotypes and like what i actually like. So yeah me realizing i wasnt really a girl has led to me embracing more 'girly' things than back when i thought i was one! So i think Darcy would have a similar arc but like..the cis equivelant? Just finds people who arent such judgmental pricks and stops having to conform to either of those stereotypes in order to keep fake friends who dont really give a shit about her. She can have a plot about both forced feminine and masculine stereotypes being equally limiting, rather than that shitty 'being masculine is a prison uwu every woman will be happier embracing her love of makeup' shit. That dominant narrative just made me feel like i was somehow wrong about myself whenever i didnt like 100% Of Sports All The Time, i must be somehow girly if i liked even ONE girly thing yet i needed hundreds of proofs if i wanted to be masculine. And like i wasnt just allowed to be neither! I wasnt allowed to like parts of both! I wasnt allowed to BE GODDAMN TRANS!!! So yeah i dunno if i'd go whole hog and make this character a trans man or a nonbinary person tho? I think she's just actually a cis girl who happens to be sporty and brash and likes a lot of 'masculine' fashion and hobbies. And she's just been made to feel self concious about it, as if she cant possibly REALLY be that unless she likes Every Single Boy Thing and wins at Every Single Challenge. Does anyone else remember that shit too? The girls have to win Every sports game against the boys in order to be 'one of the boys' but if you lose even one of them it somehow proves that you're inferior. Even though the boys lost 50 billion games to you and that doesnt prove theyre inferior! Like man she has sooooo many 'gary rivals' in her school life, thats why she loves going on this adventure with a kind brother rival who actually respects her! So her resolution would just be her staying the same but being more confident about it and saying fuk u to those fake friends. Same as her brother's plot, just they both face different specifics to the way this sexism affects them, yknow?

Oh but yeah when i did finally learn about LGBT stuff and realize i was trans it was Big Amazing cos even in the rare stories about Its Okay To Be Yourself it still left me feeling weirdly empty when the girl decides that yes she does wanna be a girl in the end. So i get that these plots might come off as queerbaiting if i write them badly? I need to make sure to make it clear that these characters 100% want to be seen as this gender and its just other people being fuckfaces and trying to define what their gender has to mean. I think maybe i'll try and mitigate this potential misunderstanding by adding different sorts of lgbt content. And, well, also cos i just want lgbt content in all of my stories because i am lgbt, of course! I'm 100% sure that Darcy is gay, and i think also maybe possibly Dustin is trans? Like, his plot is about being mocked for being a 'feminine' boy, but its also even more personal for him because he's a trans boy and he feels like he needs to change his personality in order to pass/he isnt really real because his personality doesnt fit the stereotypical image of a man. Like if you'd looked at the two of them back when they were identical twins, you probably would have expected Darcy to end up being trans if you were the sort of person who believes those basic ass stereotypes about 'boys who play with barbies and girls who play with trucks'. Or i mean maybe its the other way around and Darcy is a trans girl who still has a 'masculine' personality according to stereotypes? Or even both of them are trans and both face being told that they arent real because they dont fit the perfect stereotype of a trans person according to cis perceptions? Or maybe i'm overcomplicating things with all of this and it'd just muddy the message i guess. I might just keep it to them both being cis but also both of them like girls. And i can always apply my trans and other LGBT headcanons to other characters along their adventure.

Anyway LOL im rambling too much!