#IDK IF ILL BE ABLE 2 SEND THIS 2 PPL BUT

[especdreamy]

^ This user is hoping that they can wear their Karl Jacobs hoodie in public in peace sometime soon

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[moonlit-dreamers]

Can you rate all TSAMS Sun ships?

im gonna be careful with this one so im gonna try and avoid the ships that might be/are "incestuous" since i quite enjoy having friends and staying out of drama. once more ill probably forget some character so i apologize </3 (last post i fucking forgot dark sun im so sorry augh). also leaving out poly ships bc, again, this would go on Forever. AND ALSO same as before, the lower the rating the less i ship it and it isnt about me "disliking" it but rather not personally enjoying it

sun/eclipse - 10/10 - there is soooo much flexibility with this ship istg. probably why i always come back to it lol. it can be toxic, abusive, fluffy, enemies to lovers, fix-it, etc. *slaps suneclipse* you can fit so many dynamics in this bad boy

sun/solar - 10/10 - its on equal footing with sun/eclipse especially bc its the first ship i had in this fandom (tho i was very shy </3) cuz its just. ITS SO GOOD! its wonderful hurt/comfort and helping each other heal from the past they had with different versions of the other while also acknowledging that they arent the same and thats what makes them Better

sun/dark sun - 9/10 - do i just like selfcest? yes. yes i do. i think dark sun should let sun go apeshit and they take over the world while holding hands and kissing send post

sun/sunbeam - 8/10 - something something learning from an alternate/older version of yourself. i feel like sun would be able to guide sunbeam through a lot of things bc he understands sunbeam in a way others cant. or maybe i just like selfcest-

sun/moonshine - 7/10 - honestly i dont really Have any ideas for this ship but. i like them. i think itd be cute

sun/ruin - 7/10 - i think they could fix each other /j ghfskgjdfhg in all seriousness itd be fun. again, no ideas, but i like it

sun/solarflare - 6/10 - it most certainly has potential. lil guy with lots of energy x big emotionless robot learning about the world.

sun/foxy - 4/10 - i used to be a HUGE kidscove shipper but then i got bored after i started being more active with dca/dca ships in this fandom. i still think its fun and cute, i just dont like it anymore *shrug*

sun/bloodmoon - 4/10 - i can kinda see it? idk. maybe with v1 bloodmoon but v2? eh? idk man i just watch ppl clump rocks together on the playground and i sit there like "i have no fucking clue what theyre doing but theyre having fun with their rocks" and thats pretty much how i feel about this ship ghjfdghdk

sun/killcode - 3/10 - head empty so i got no comment </3 but i Do see the appeal of big monster x lil guy.

sun/monty - 3/10 - meh. not that interested in it. tho in general i dont really enjoy ships as much if they arent dca/dca rghsrgrgkj but yeah with this its an eh for me

sun/puppet - 2/10 - out of genuine curiosity- does anyone ship this? idk if ive seen it before so i feel like this is some ultra-rarepair shit. shout out to you if you ship this

i feel like im forgetting some ppl but thats okay cuz i can edit them in later when i remember who it is while im trying to sleep <3

[anemoiashifts]

the exploitation of mental health within the shifting community.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

im saying this with the intention to not send a wave of hate to anyone but a shitoker with 50,000 followers who confessed (on reddit) to to lying about it shifting for about 2 years & has bragged about making just under $2000 in sponsorships & then goes onto call ppl who shift mentally ill, schizophrenic & delusional. they’ve also they know how easy it is to lie bc ppl are “wanting an escape”. they’ve entertained the idea that “to save their asses” they should — if they do confess to lying — to make it out like she was doing it as a way to get tiktok followers, as if that isn’t preying upon ppls desperation to get out of toxic & harmful situations & wanting of a better life.

taking this for what it is, I want to talk about the exploitation of ppls mental health within the shifting community — mainly shiftok.

it’s not secret 85% or shiftok is mentally ill kids who want to escape this reality out of loneliness or destructive & toxic situations. i take such an issue with this because of this reason specifically (other then the speed of misinformation & drowning out actual ppl who are educated / want to shift). if someone believes shifters are really just “mentally ill 13 year olds” — her words not mine — why not…idk ? try to squeeze in content trying to encourage ppl getting better ? but , no. ppl who lie about shifting can’t do that bc they’re blinded by numbers & profit & not the well being of children who are struggling deeply. if shifting is real & made up & “grown ass ppl who believe in it too, sadly” —again, her words not mine — believe in shifting , why are you knowingly profiting from mental problems ?

this isn’t simply ppl “lying about shifting”. it’s other children & adults build a platform & make profit from the exploitation of peoples desperation for a better life. we need to start looking at it this way.

the only ppl who are worse then anti-shifters are the ppl who knowingly lie for years. they’re the sick ones, not us.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

sorry if this brought the vibes down a tad. ive been looking for an excuse to speak up on this for a while. id like to expand upon this conversation more as there’s so many thoughts i have about it in the future.

to calm your worries , yes shifting is real. no , im not lying about shifting. all we can do is wish the best for these kind of ppl & hope they’re able to stop chronically lying & learn that their actions do have consequences.

again , please do not try & find this person. im not trying to ruin someone’s life as they’re fifteen themselves.

[yagamisdiary]

I have a love hate relationship with the fact that you enjoy making us suffer throughout the entirety of your books and making us think they will have a bad ending just to give us the best possible endings ever 🥲 ugh i love you so much youre my favorite author ever, while im here i apologize for the incoming paragraphs but i just need to say it:

1. Idk how you do it but the book covers you choose are always so perfect like?? Idk if im explaining myself but i feel like they capture the vibes of the books perfectly

2. Ok now this is kinda personal and i dont mean to sound like im venting, but have you ever read a fic that impacted you so much to the point where you find yourself still thinking about it to this day 😭 bc that's how i feel about both of ur books, they're so beautifully written and i'm always thinking about the characters or going back to read random parts of the books (edit: i had this paragraph written way before parasite was removed okay but i started rereading eldia yesterday because im truly heartbroken, devastated, downcast, miserable, dejected and inconsolable by the fact that its finished)

I discovered you in july-ish 2021 during parasite era but didnt actually read it until june 2022, i was devastated when i finished it but also had to cleanse my soul cause i accidentally burnt my self out during the last few chapters (i mean it in a good way lol, it was rlly hard to read the last 2 chapters 🙇‍♀️ they were written really well and i felt unsettled while reading the beginning of y/ns whole breakdown, i could feel the gloomy depressed vibe it had if you get what i mean), so anyway i moved on to Eldia. At that time, it was fairly new so there were only like 10 or 11 chapters, ive been keeping up with Eldia ever since and its truly bittersweet to see it end like i was literally full on sobbing for no reason 🥲 probably the sentiment of being a reader for 2 years idk lol. Anyway what im trying to say is that your books were one of the only things that helped me escape reality in 2022, i didnt really find joy in anything and hated my life, however ive definitely improved ever since, so im honestly rlly thankful for you Amara 💕

Edit: i just know it sounds stupid and youre probably tired of hearing the same thing over and over, but i've had this written out for like 5 months and was kinda scared to send it because i felt like it was corny, but with Eldia's resolution i felt encouraged seeing all these people tell you what they think :P so sorry for the long ass paragraph lmao, i just needed to say it because i know in 10 years ill be a grown ass woman and still thinking about these books, theyre attached to my brain forever (like a parasite, ironic)

Ok so i doubt ppl will read this (or that you'll even read all of it) so if you reached the end i must say that you actually ate with the baby names in Eldia 🤭 im saying it here to avoid accidentally spoiling anyone but Andromeda 😪 i remember in early july i sent you an anon ask saying that i pictured you as a girl mom and even listed a few names, i was gonna list Andromeda so its kinda funny to me 😭 and Elrose?? Andromeda is my fav name but Elrose grew on me and i actually rlly like it, idk why it just sounds and looks so satisfying OMG DAMN I JUST SCROLLED UP AND DID I REALLY WRITE ALL OF THAT?? IM SO SORRY AMARA 😭😭 i definitely had way more to say but i feel bad now, it was gonna be an anonymous ask but atp i'll just let it be public

to conclude i must say that whenever someone asks me what my favorite books are, i hate that im not able to say "Oh my favorite books are parasite and eldia" because they're considered fanfics and not 'real books', i think thats really stupid, not only because fanfiction is just as valid as what ppl consider 'real books' but because there are so many fanfictions turned into real books or movies?? Ok im done (for now) but as you can tell im not really good at going straight to the point sorry for writing about 10 paragraphs love you queen vivan las escritoras latinas 🤞

1. honestly i find a pic that fits the vibe i want the book to give before i even write the story then i just somehow find a way to incorporate the cover

ex) eldia’s cover is jean with wine all over him, iykyk there’s an exact scene in eldia that references the cover

2. thank u so much 🥲 the ppl who have stuck around the longest always say the most sweet stuff bc yall really have been alongside me for so many years now and were like growing together which is kinda cool

3. i wanted a name that had ambrose and elijah both in it and it was either elrose or embrose but i ended up liking elrose more, embrose was too similar to ambrose

4. i don’t mind the length of the message at all! i love love love reading all the stuff i receive and the ones that are the longest stick with me the most. 🫶🏼

[rollercoasterwords]

(this is from marxismlupinism btw just sending an anon cause still shadowbanned + dont want my r/s blog tied to my main blog anyway)

lmao if only my followers were your followers literally idk why my anons r so mad im just stating the established party line of the blog they chose to follow...

literally every online community ive been in youve been able to say you think the community has XYZ problem and people could discuss the problem and suggest solutions honestly baffling that peoples response to someone saying the hp fandom is transphobic is to go "no it's not" instead of, idk, either trying to make it less transphobic if you think it's salvageable or leaving it if you think it's unsalvageable. the only communities ik that would respond to an accusation of transphobia w denial rather than taking trans people's concerns seriously are, well, actually overtly explicitly transphobic communities lol... and the people claiming they "engage critically" are very clearly not if their response to criticism of the hp fandom is to be defensive—if you engage critically with something that means taking seriously good faith criticism of the thing you engage critically with. like i "engaged critically" w hp/rs for the past 2.5 years and i have never ever gotten defensive at someone criticising hp or its fandom (esp since like... almost all the people criticising hp or its fandom are trans and im not gonna go harass another trans person for being understandably upset at ppl engaging w transphobic media lol).

hp fans (including tme trans hp fans—and, btw, we're well aware there are some transmasculine hp fans, the rest of the trans community just think they suck and are losers lol and i can't imagine that the transmasc hp fans aren't aware of this fact unless they just dont interact w other trans people outside the hp fandom at all) will criticise hp and jkr while believing that the hp fandom itself is above criticism. this does the dual work of distancing themselves from harry potter/jkr, which even they cannot defend/pretend is not bad, while also absolving themselves of all responsibility for any transphobia & transmisogyny they perpetuate or engage in. it's honestly a deeply immature way of engaging with media as well as one that logically falls apart under any scrutiny—firstly, if you accept that hp and its author are deeply bigoted, isn't it just logical that its fanbase would share the politics of the source media? secondly, this is just empirically false lol. there didnt always used to be basically no trans women in the hp fandom—i myself used to be friends with several back in the old days—but most transfems left the fandom in 2020–2021 bc of jkr's increasing transmisogyny. and speak to any of the transfems who did leave at that time and they can tell you their firsthand experiences. like, i really dunno how you can claim the hp fandom isnt transmisogynistic without just outright saying that you think most trans women are crazy and making shit up when they say they dont want anything to do with hp or its fans.

anyway ill stop writing essays in ur inbox now rae xoxo love ya have a nice day!

hi laura <3 yeah truly i think it is so weird that someone would choose 2 follow a blog on tumblr.com which clearly states "i don't like hp/hp fandom" and then get mad when that blog makes a post saying. "i don't like hp/hp fandom." babe why r u at the criticizing hp fandom store if u don't want hp fandom criticism....

and yeah i've talked before on my blog abt how like. i do not think we can "separate" fandom from jkr + the inherent shittiness of hp + my personal stance is that i think if u are engaging with hp fandom in 2023 u should at least be prepared to acknowledge + address the fact that u are engaging w a fundamentally conservative piece of media that is rooted in horrible politics, bc if u don't fully understand how jkr's politics are steeped throughout the franchise then it is much more likely that u will just be. absorbing + perpetuating them.

i think something that gets left out of a lot of conversations abt jkr even when discussing how shitty she is within hp fandom is the fact that like. yeah she's broadly transphobic, but she is specifically transmisogynistic, and the politics + policies she endorses are most targeted + harmful towards trans women. in my personal experience thus far in hp fandom i've encountered a lot of tme trans people, and i think there can be this tendency to go "well i'm trans and i know so many trans people who have carved out a space in this fandom that is super affirming + positive for ourselves, so obviously there is no transphobia here" and like. bc of the strong emotional connection to what people view as a safe queer space it can feel like an attack or whatever when someone goes "ok but. have u considered transmisogyny." or just whenever someone is like. rude/mean/cunty in their criticism of hp--but like. tbh as tme trans people i just think it's more important to recognize that many other trans people (and especially tma trans people) have a reason for being rude/mean/cunty in their criticism of hp and even if it hurts ur feelings it's more important to actually think about where that critique is coming from then to get upset bc u feel like it wasn't phrased nicely. at the end of the day just bc a space feels safe 2 u does not mean it is going 2 feel safe 2 everyone!!

[tojisun]

WAAA U NOTICED SO QUICKLY !! i was gonna tell u after that i changed my user n all, TWAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SURPRISE SUNSUN grrrrrr its ok tho ur off the hook! but but im glad you like the theme!!!!! i have yet to warm up to it, maybe ill change it to a blue theme if i dislike it:0 who knows !!

YAYYYYY YOU LIKE THE SONG!!!??? DUDE ITS SO GROOVY YES I LOVE IT!!! i was dancing to it in my room w headphones on *BITES KNUCKLES* ITS SO GOOD!! sunsun i would frickin LOVE to go to a pub or smfin with you n dance n have fun :< ITS A DREAM !!!!!!!!

ALSO YES UR SO CUTE!!! i could like bite ur cheeks (im wack ik, dont u dare look at me) ur just so adorable BFMDBDB HEHE i love you so so much!!!!!! MWAH MWAH

SMOOCHIEESSSSSSE N BIG BEAR HUGS !!!!!! update on meeee: ive been doing well otherwise! my semester just ended and my summer session is starting next week so im excited for that! its just one class, gonna be chill :> nuffin crazy !

HOW R U HAVE U PAMPERED URSELF YET (u better soon bc u deserve it miss maam) HOWS WORK !? U SAID THAT DUDE WAS A BIT BETTER BUT THEN HE MADE U MAD !! i feel like he's giving u whiplash :| ill fight him for you sunsun, just you let me know.

(i yapped so much omg oki *throws a flower at u* bye bye)

i check ppls blogs when they send me stuff shebjehehe

ouu blue would be pretty too!!

and yes i do love the song!! i was listening to it w my headphones too so the bass and everything were so rich in my ears aaahhhhhh and no fr :(( ur such a sweetheart, i wanna go out with u and stuffff

i never expected to appear cute online so thank u for seeing me that way Hhehwhe <33 i love you so much too darling dear !!!!

oh yey!! i hope ur enjoying ur summer break and that ur summer sem would be a cruise!! i made an error (well, a habit at this point) of being a full time student again during summer and our buildings are so old i keep getting stifled

two of my profs sound inchresting tho. the other one 😭 oh god her voice lulls me to sleep

im pamperin myself today!! after going to the drs n stuff BUT YEA!! my sister’s gon take me out drivin too which is fun bc my instructor’s been sick for a week now :(

WORK WAS GOOD! idk if i shared this here yet but we found a fuckin mic in our tech room and he was able to make it work (i may have kinda influenced him to focus on making the mic work instead of us actually doing our tasks, and that shit took 2 hrs so 😭)

yea no fr hes giving me a whiplash. although we’re finally building a good rapport w each other! he hates my music taste tho like fuck him wtv but thats bc hes into oldies rock. i played bad omens bc he asked what do i mean by modern metal and then he said no thanks and asked if i have mobile (band) instead. which, yea i do 😭 so we bonded over that ig

but yea! he still tends to be so aggravating but im learning to let it wash over me bc IM STUCK BESIDE HIM what good is it to let the anger fester (prioritizing myself!!!)

BUT YEA I RAMBLED AGAIN i need to shut it upppop!!! bye sweetheart <33

[isoobie]

hii, im asking like a bunch of writers for an opinion on this ! im 13 ( ‘10 ) nn looking 2 become a writer on here but i like told one of friends n they were like “ no u probably shouldn't, ure kinda young ” personally i don't see a problem as ill be respecting boundaries of like adults n stuff like that doesn't want minors on their blog, won't be interacting with nsfw works at all nn be in like my own lil corner w ppl that r comfy w a 13 turning 14yro interacting w them and stuff, so is my friend right orr am i able to write nd stuff on here ?

hello !!! welcome to blr ^^ i hope u enjoy it here a have a good time btw

imo i am a minor just like you so i can kind of relate you in a way but i really apperiacte you sending this ask first before doing anything on the app first ( im assuming ) i don't think 13 is that young considering they are younger people on this app but and the end of the day it is ur choice.

about the nsfw works, as a minor myself i do see alot of smut tags pop up and some of my moots write nsfw works as well but you just have to be careful and take responsibility about that if you wanna stay on this app.

tbh the main thing i think that's important is to check people's carrd ( this is so random and im so sorry if you don't understand what i am about to say ) because that's where all there information is stored idk what to call it but it's really useful when making mutuals and interacting w other accs.

like i said at the beginning it ur choice and you should remember to be safe on the app if you want start :D hoped it help & please ask more question if u want im very happy to help !!!

[irrealisms]

💌 hiiiii wil hru

HI ORACLE oh man it's been a While since we talked huh!!!! i have been really good actually, moved states to escape psychiatry & move in with my partner in a neat 2-for-1 deal

i realize you are no longer a dsmp main but you have excellent dsmp takes and you're super kind! and it was really really good talking to you while i was failing out of part-time school as, like--idk, disabled solidarity? it was just one conversation but i definitely remember it as like. it made me feel a lot better about being bad at things and not being able to work or do school and so on, & it was a good reminder tht like. the ppl i think are cool on tumblr also have these sorts of struggles.

(mutuals send me a 💌 and ill tell u something i love about you)

[rebellum]

Ive had a bad day today (due to period and I think overexertion) after 2 good days where I did a couple hours each day of work (hence thr overexertion)(also i totally forgot how to spell that autocorrect saved the day idk if you guys would have gotten "over ex her sion") and so I'm having one of those moments where I'm just Fed Up. It feels like when there's a big snow storm in late March. Like, hey, this isn't rally unexpected, but come ON we are SO CLOSE cant this just be over yet?

And i worry that I'm actually lying to ppl somehow bc I feel like my boyfriend doesn't understand how sick I still am, even tho he definitely knows (and is the one to have to tell me "hey, picking a video game based on which is less likely to cause mass real life death from demons is a mental illness thought, just so you know") and so he definitely knows so I dont know why I feel like I'm lying. Maybe cause my friends don't know the details? But I think they know i have more than just anxiety and depression and trauma. At the psychiatrist office the other day I said i didn't have ptsd and we had a weird miscommunication where he thought I meant I dont have trauma. When obviously I do very much. And he had to be like "someone who wasn't traumatized wouldn't be crying in my office right now" (he said that much kinder than how I'm typing it) and I was so confused and then explained that I don't have nightmares about the trauma and he was like "yeah but you don't need nightmares to have ptsd" but then he immediately moved on , which was weird, like ok are you thinking I could have ptsd and don't know it?? But I dont think i do, it doesn't ruin my life like others, tho I'll admit the people I'm close to who have it have cptsd which has slightly different symptoms, I can see my fingers typing from the mirror that's near my bed and it confused and almost startled me for a quick second lol. Earlier today I experienced some heart palpitations like I haven't for a while, so I guess I have to keep an eye on that, it was bizarre because I was fine and just sitting there and suddenly it felt like my heart was a horse with 11 legs, I would have said a lesser number that would have made slightly more sense (i mean, 11 is too much, it wuldnt be able to go anywhere) but those were potentially numbers that didn't have their place in this post right now (tho I like using them some times, I have nothing against you guys)(sorry @ readers) but I mean my heart was beating so fast and so erratically and it was ODD like uh. Hi. Haven't had you get this bad in a while. It's fine though I'm fine, I have a beh nine heart murmur and tach ee cardia (or is it palpitations? Or both?) But turns out while my heart acts weird its still fine, like when someone puts on tap handles the wrong way. Did you guys know that's a thing? I don't mean like the cold tap says hot, I mean like its supposed to be a tap water runs when you move the handle towards you, but if you mess up it makes it so that to turn the tap on you turn the handle away from you, which can work if there's space, but when my brothers sink randomly exploded a few weeks ago (and started sending up a whole guys-er) my bro and parents went to fix it and put the taps on the wrong way, and it was against a wall so they had to go back to step like 5 of putting a sink together and redo it.

[imraespace]

doing your hair last night and then it gets wet is so real 💔💔

im currently makinf another rin edit to post for his bday today once again bc i feel like this one edit is really easy to do BUT NOW IM LOOKING FOR FONTS SO THIS ISNT EVEN THAT EASY EITHER SO MANY FONTS R UGLY 👿👿

i was actually typing this ask like an hour or so ago but then one of my bluelock moots just?? ASKED ME FOR MATH HELP? i mean i helped them but like theyre basically making me do their work for them?? i dont really mind bc they seem younger than me but like broski im someone who makes edits and you ask me ABOUT MATH?? i thought id be able to escape math because i have it next semester but apparently not if im helping ppl on the internet STOP

theyre also honestly a little weird and very how do i say this like funny inappropriate??? like they started talking ab theyre gonna tickle me and stuff (if u get my gist HELP) like theyre a minor im also a minor so i dont really care bc ik theyre like YK JOKING BUT IM ALSO LIKE WE MET?? 2 DAYS AGO????? AND URE ALREADY LIKE THIS?? like im the same w my friends but ive known them for 3+ years and they just met me and theyre already going at it.. LIKE I DONT REALLY CARE TOO MUCH BUT ITS QUESTIONABLE??

i have chem homework due today at 11:59pm but im too lazy to get up and submit it like i legit already have it done but im… too lazy to get up take a photo and submit 💔 i cant be doing this

i started writing this at like 5:30 why did i finish typing this at practically 6:30 THIS IS NOT REAL

- 🐙

OMG YOU REMINDED ME TO MAKE MY EDIT (its gonna be unserious bc its on capcut and idk how to use capcut.. and im lazy) actually i had this edit idea for the itoshi brothers for a while but im lazy! maybe ill make it some day I HATE FONT HUNTING then i get distracted and forget im editing

HELPME MATHS IM CAKCLIN quit editing and become a maths teacher online🙏🏽🙏🏽!!

HELP TICKLE YOU? dang 2 days ago they wanna be your best friend!! i mean i understand but i think thats a bit too much for 2 days on tiktok if a mutual started talking to me in 2 days time im still scared to send a video HELP

haha chem hw cant relate as a business student!!! *points and laugh bc im too lazy to find the emojis on laptop* but i can relate with the lazy HELP i have typing hw to do and im typing rn! but i dont wanna open up word to type silly work😒

ALSO WHY DID IT TAKE YOU AN HOUR HELP

actually i wanna edit now i blame you (im joking)

[audiovisualrecall]

Called out from work for today's shift past night bc I was really not feeling well, like sick and wasn't sure how I'd feel in the morning or if I'd be able to be up in time for work (didn't fall asleep until 1am, and no lunch packed) and of course now I feel fine and am not sure if the 2 people I texted counts as 'informing my supervisor' as the callout line person says to do as well, or if I should've just called the store when I woke up at 8 to ask to speak to produce lead at the time bc idk if that is one of the ppl I texted or not and I don't have contact # for the other 2 ppl. But I Did let someone know! I also did call out properly on the phone line and so store leadership knows and should have informed whoever opened today in theory.

Anyway so I feel worried over that, but I also feel silly for calling out and then feeling fine. Like maybe I should have called in *late* instead?? And then just whenever I got up gotten ready and headed over whenever I could? And I'd still be there to help bc Saturdays are a lot of work and a lot of it keeps falling on my team member like we had a lot in yesterday iirc and I was off then so I just feel bad. Bc I'm fine now! I'm totally fine! So I feel guilty for calling out and not going to work, I feel guilty that anita will be doing all the work today since I'm not there, and I feel guilty for being home on a Saturday and not going to shul even tho I wasn't supposed to be home anyway?? Idk. Brains are annoying. Blugh.

And also I accidentally said yes to 'do you have symptoms of a food borne illness' bc like. kinda?? But that's not the cause of the symptom? Bc I'm 90% sure it was caused by some oregano and/or tomato in my lunch on Wednesday and/or eating too much chocolate + corn recently. In other words, not a result of an illness, just a result of food sensitivities/intolerances being triggered. But since technically it Is a symptom that is shared w food borne illness I felt weird saying no so I was like uhhh...yyeeesss? And before I could clarify that the guy said he would send the info to store leadership and said goodbye and hung up lol. But I feel kinda dumb for that too.

So I'm just getting an extra day off for no reason and I'm so used to 'If you can't go to [work] then you can't do anything fun either' (used to be abt school, bc I would stay home in middle school pretending to not feel well bc I was unhappy there. I did not share how i was feeling with anyone, not even my social worker oe school counselor. Everyone tried, srsly. But the message of 'can't do anything fun if u felt bad enough to stay home' has unfortunately stuck too well in my brain)

[octocurse]

ok now onto just sending everything tht might and might not be canon. Most is a decided yes tho. Remember the tws still apply !! Also spoilers if ur wanting info in order or something idk

also imagery of animal death and gore

Melo (9) was created from the other half of Misery’s soul, an attempt to remember a time when it was alive and happy. Misery doesn’t have a “Real Name”, or one that it actually remembers. After being stuck in the monoplain for hundreds of years, part of it has deteriorated, the rest of what was human. Its soul is stronger than ever, however. Its actual title is The Misery, I just refer to it by simply Misery since it can be redundant. These ocs have been long in the making- With it having just started out as my persona, some kid and a literal demon (that looked like a homophobic oc for hazbin hotel/hj)

(Please ignore the photo of some atmosphere tumblr wont let me delete it)

These are some early stage stuff I drew, from early of last year. The most recent redesign I have saved would be this:

I don’t remember when I drew it, but Midas and 9 have generally stayed the same. Theres literally no reason for 9 to be part cat but she’s allowed 2 be bc I said so (I can’t draw hands). Also, I apparently tried renaming them to Hecate but I suck at naming things so it didn’t work out lol

I’m thinking of redesigning Misery to have something like a plague doctor mask that has no eyes.

in the original thing The Misery committed and that’s what caused the hundreds of years to lead 2 this but I don’t think ?? i want that to be canon bc I’m actually smart and know that I don’t have the brain skills to handle a successful attempt in a story.

Misery is prolly gonna have been ill from an infected outer wound and that’s what killed them. Either way I guess I just want them 2 have like. A death that can be interpreted by anyone as something different in a way.

I think Misery and Melo r transmasc and transfem hostility maybe.

I don’t know when but I had decided earlier on that 9 would rename herself Melo later on. heres more art tht is based on stuff 4 stage (i think) 3-4

They’ve changed a lot since this. But I miiight bring back the other neos, who knows

Her and Imani (name might change in the future) I think would either have a mother-child or sibling relationship since I created them to have come from a similar form of creation.

Imani was also created by a lonely spirit and got shoved into the exact same spot, just with different motives. The spirit wanted to create life, but Misery wanted to BE alive.

(Not canon at all, still deciding) Most of the ppl in the town were actually formed the same way, but they don’t remember it bc of the travelers, who often replace memories and are able to get them to connect to the world around it. Imani likely works with the travelers in helping collect spirits.

Due to how Melo was created, her body doesn’t rlly. Work right. Take that how you want, but it literally REJECTS Misery from it, and it’s why they get burnt by the barriers. Misery isn’t a good person !! It traumatizes Melo. And most of s2 is her learning how to cope with everything- A new environment, new people, and a lot of trauma.

I’ve experienced my fair share of trauma (not gonna go into detail but I’ve experienced abuse and traumatic events), and I want to project ways of coping onto Melo.

Melo at her core is a child- She’s a scared child with a fucked up spirit sharing a body w/ her until she literally DRAGS it out of her. but she Still doesn’t feel ok after. Because she’s still healing. Healing takes time, and I want to show that time- The growth process, the change, being weaker but becoming stronger in a special way. How she doesn’t have to go through it alone- she eventually has a good support system. Friends and adoptive family.

Theres so many changes I need and want to make for this story- so many things r being planned and changed every time I suddenly fixate on this silly thing again. I care about these characters so much.

Melo will never forgive Misery, and she’s allowed to.

“Adventures w/ 9”, a show I want 2 create about mental health, growth and change. I’m absolutely open to ANY suggestions !! [Note- I’m updating as I spam my friends !! Also, very long post.] [TW for - Implied transphobia, death, implied s//icide, multiple forms of ab//ce, religious figures referred to as gods, murder, animal death, looots of stuff. (It gets worse) please be careful w/ reading !! I don’t go into super detail abt everything but religion and death are MAJOR things in it.]

Keep reading

[yandererichietozier]

pass the happy along! when you get this, reply with five things that make you happy then send this to the last ten people in your activity!

SRY THIS IS LATE I JST NOTICED THIS NOW!!!

1. MY INTERESTS!!! currently like. IT makes me super fuckin happy bc its a big SI of mine atm, but i’ve been fixating on B.99 recently tbh it’s so sexy

2. MY BFS!!! MY BFS ARE SO SO CUTE, i love them so much, one of em sent me a cute bunny plush as a late christmas gift or sth nd its so cute. i love them sm, they both say rly sweet things n are both just super funny i can’t wait to get to know them more n spend as much time as i can w/ them!! i adore them

3. MY FRIENDS!!! I ALSO RLY LOVE MY FRIENDS, esp my butch mom @sunbutch & the horror kin squad, they all put up w/ my bs nd dumb jokes so i rly do love them all sm

4. MUSIC BICH!!! I love music sm it’s my fuckign life line, esp buddy holly & frankie lymon. holy fuck their voices are so smooth, i love buddy holly sm he’s like an idol fr me rn. but yeah generally i fucking love music, esp instruments like the trumpet n guitar which im planning on learning in th future

5. UUHHHH sth else that makes me happy is probs how far ive come n how im trying so fucking hard to improve myself even though i do dumb shit like trying to push myself harder than i should rather than taking baby steps-- BUT. IM A LOT BETTER THAN I WAS LAST YEAR TBH, SO IM WORKIN TOWARDS RECOVERY THIS YEAR FUCK YEHA

[kpophubb]

Hii it's me!

Your Hee anonie~ ☆

I'm back and ready to spam you with love. However, this message won't be any soft hour or imagine :O !

Firstly, seeing your response makes me giggle and my friends actually suspected for like 2 weeks that I actually had a crush on someone. As if law school gives time for that. ANYWAY after much confrontation I told them that it's me reading your response to my asks hehehe

Secondly, soooooooo I am huge reader and I mainly love to read classics, mysteries and legal thrillers (whodunit!!!) And there was book fair in my campus!! 60% off 😲 SO OFC I WENT and I was picking up classics, some textbooks etc. And I passed by romance section. Now I am not a romance reader (I have read a few which I LOVE) anyway but I love looking at what's new or what's currently hot in each genre. And suddenly I get surrounded by like 8 girls who are simultaneously going "NO PLS YOU GOTTA READ THIS ILL GIVE MY FIRST BORN IF YOU DO" "it's so good" "you'll cry" "you jaw will be hanging open" blah blah etc etc and help I didn't even know like 3 of them 😭

Guess which book of them were talking about ??

Coolen Hoover's It Ends With Us. And ngl I am kinda hesitant about romance genre itself but also a little to try books from Katie Roberts, Colleen Hoover, Jenny Han etc. Because I just feel like I will be disappointed and there will be a lot of "oh they're teenagers, they're growing they make stupid mistakes" kinda things idk if I am able to explain it nicely. Just hesitant that I might invest time into a book only to get irritated at tbe actions of the characters. And while I do understand that there won't be any drama if the characters were completely rational and fine, it just gets under my nerves when they make stupid decisions like getting back with someone who cheated on them, parents being useless, doing drugs at parties etc. IK I SOUND LIKE A STUCK UP RN BUT PLS I JUST WANT A BOOK WITH RATIONAL AND NORMAL PEOPLE. anyway point is I was like ??? Is this a cult ??? Anyway I ended up getting the book because well they were like "we'll pay for it !!" And how can I say no to my bestie spending money 🤨🤨 true friendship right there.

And then I OPEN TUMBLR AND SEE COLLEEN HOOVER IN YOUR ACC ?? IS THIS A CULT ?

Also here are the romance books I have read AND really loved :

1. House in the Cerulean Sea (ok not really romance but ?? It's still fluff and has romance and found family)

2. Red, white and Royal Blue

3. The Kiss Quotient

4. The Lovely War

Pls I will FRAME THIS BOOK. MAKE A SHRINE. SO GOOD. help.

Anyway do tell me your thoughts on your fav books if you read !! And hehehe pls 🙏 saw your masterlist 😟 I am stunned 🤐 speechless 🤯 masterpieces 💫 I gotta binge read everything now ig I have no other choice.

ALSO YES THIS IS WHAT I ACTUALLY STARTED WRITING THIS ASk FOR.

Are you up for some angst too? Like I have some angsty thoughts if you want. Ofc with enha AlSo may include some SKZ members idk I am not telling 😚

Anyway stay hydrated !! Byeeeee ♡☆♡☆♡

Also yes I manifest Jake hoon live everytime I send you an ask hehe

Hello and welcome my hee anonie 🥺🫶🏻 (I just saw your ask a while ago and I DASHED to get all my work done so I could sit down and reply nicely to you that’s how much attention you deserve from me and everyone) FIRST AND FOREMOST, HAPPY HEESEUNG DAY!🖤

Aaaaaah I love this kinda gossip!! You don’t even have to come up with imagines all the time trust me I love it sm when ppl fill me up with their random thoughts and what they did throughout the day cause it’s so adorable to me!! You can always go upto someone and send them fanfics, but only ppl who care for u and love u truly will sit down and listen to you rant and find you cute for it! For me you’re like that ♡ and ugh omg!😭 if they suspected that, then that means my asks must have made you SMILE REALLY BIG!🥺 that makes me so flattered and smiley you have no idea xhdndjdndj yaay achievement unlocked!😘 (ikr how do people even date when they’re law or med students but FIRST, how do people even date when they Stan enha istg I can’t find anyone else attractive irl my brain has smh registered jake as my real love lmao anyway)

Now I’ll be real honest with you. I’d give it ends with us a 7.5/10 and not really recommend it for someone like you who’s really busy and looking for a 11/10 experience, without any disappointments. I read the book when I was 16 y/o and I remember finding it so touching and good but when I reread the book again once I turned 18, I realized there are so many things wrong with that book? So many mistakes and messed up situations and most importantly, so many triggering themes with no warnings like- childhood trauma, death of a loved one, abusive parents, rape etc. etc. it’s a real bad buzz if you have any one of these traumas as it might inflict unwanted pain inside your heart for no reason. On the other hand, I’d really suggest you “twisted love.” It’s an adult romance book, it’s for mature adult readers, has twists and smut too, friendships, family and it’s really an ♾️/10 for me. :’) <3 and about your Recs??! I’d definitely check them out baby I’m a big bookaholic!

Aww thank you so so much?🥹 I really like editing pics and videos as a free time hobby and since I didn’t have access to internet for 2 hours I edited all the layouts and pics for my masterlist! Thank u so much for showering my works with love. :’) and pls I love angst? Angst is so so underrated in my opinion. Everywhere is fluff and smut but my fav genre is angst tbh. I have a request to you, in your free time, PLS READ MY FIC “but were you mine?” Part 1 is attached to it read it first it’s a small drabble and I also attached and made a video with the title to double the heartbreak effect lol. It was really personal, the dialogues really reflected the insides of my heart a lot, unrequited love and I go hand in hand and that fic I wrote is the most special and closest to my heart. So I’d be so honoured if you read the 2 series drabble and lmk your thoughts. And, I’ll also be up for your angsty imagines ugh I’ll be waiting!!

You take care too bubs!! Ikr I hope so too jakehoon always come live when we talk? That would be so cool!😭 it’s already so cool that you found my book ask after you bought it, see everything you do brings you back to me tehee <3 🙈 now time for my unnecessary tmis that you didn’t ask for. OKAY SO remember how I told you I wanted to make a collector enha ig account? I FINALLY MADE IT! aah so so happy I’ve always found them so aesthetic I can’t believe I made one for me. 🥹 I’ll be posting reels someday too over there hehe! I also feel very relaxed recently cause I wrote poetry in my journal and decorated it with my feelings so AAAH! Since this got quite long anyway, I’ll end this but let you know first that- YOU ARE LOVED, YOU ARE AMAZING, YOU ARE APPRECIATED, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, BE KIND TO YOURSELF AND I LOVE YOU SO VERY MUCH! 🤍🤍

[growing-up-poor-culture]

Really sorry for the inactivity but I've been dealing with paperwork regarding our benefits the last 3 months.

Vent ahead: tw suicidal ideation, tw cussing, tw trauma(??)

The problems started EVEN before i finished my finals and cuz my parents aren't knowledgable in the language of the country we reside in, I've been dealing with the paperwork from ABROAD, during my FINALS, while going throu a depressive episode and horrible executive dysfunctioning + not taking care of my health and when i finished my exams and returned back home I STILL had to deal with these paperworks. And they even asked for more paperwork and temporarily shut out benefits funding.

Being fucking poor isn't just a state it's your health, physically and mentally and it's so exhausting having to prove you are broke as fuck and need help to survive.

The benefits we get are also literally called MINIMUM WAGE and we are a family of 6 members.

My dad has a minor permanent disability, resulting in him not being able to work at all. Even walking for a bit can cause his back to hurt and then he needs to rest for awhile

My mom has been job hunting but they refuse her jobs due to her garments (they do not state it as it is unlawful but they find any random excuses to say no, or even flat out say they dont need workers when the work office itself sent her there)

My older brother is a university student and is awaiting his renewed ID and is not allowed to work without it, so even if he wanted to get a job he cant

Im also a university student and Ive applied for jobs but im also undiagnosed chronically ill, been so since I was a young child. I have a problem with my muscles/lower leg bones which the doctors still dont know the caus off

The money we receive barely covers our living cost. We never buy clothes , we go to different places that hand out food for help, I'm living at my uni dorms for free and not paying anything at all. thats the only reason my parents are able to send 2 of their children to study ouf the country

Like the only reason Im able to get my education is cuz i dont live in USA (thank god) and therefore public universities are for free.

They can't expect us to drop out of school and work to support our family (especially considering how slow they are at giving us our renewed IDs) .

Studying is the long time investment so we can work in the future and support ourselves

The whole reason i created this account is cuz growing up poor fucking sucked and what sucked even more is being treated as a menance, as if we enjoy living like this

And what's worse is that im slowly losing hope of ever being able to be financially independent and truly thrive.

I losta big portion of my chilhood and adolescence to being poor as heck. I developed fear of buying stuff that even now, that our situation has improved cuz we've been receiving help , i still do not buy necessery food items. I've grown so tired of the situation that I'm even having suicidal ideation. Had my parents not needed me to help them throu this idk what i would have done to myself

And what's even more frustrating is that I can't explain or vent to anyone else about this cuz the situation is so complicated and most ppl wont understand that this is our livelihood and that losing it means we could lose our permit of stay in this country and be kicked out even tho ive grown in this country since i was 8 years old

I apologize for the rant

But if this aint growing up poor culture then what is it?✌✌