#holy shit im so caught off guard

[birbsong]

wait i didnt expect cappet, albizzi and boborano's cn vas to be so good i thought this was just a random world quest??

[thebisexualwizard]

Got asked out by another wizard and he is nice!?? I DIDNT SEE THIS IN THE PONDERING ORB?? BUT HUZZAH!!

[courtillyy]

im sorry chilled is another mcc ????? why tf am i just finding this out now. im going to lose my actual shit. god bless the gods who decided to make it easy to accidentally sign up. god Bless them

[transsoftwaredev]

Durge: no more secrets! You all need to tell me everything upfront.

Shadowheart: what happened to that bard?

Durge: ..... we can have some secrets.

[tgcg]

an open fly walking

i didnt like this one but i thought id finally air it out since its been sat in my folders for months now

TG: hey karkat

CG: YEAH?

===

TG: you ever noticed you like

TG: walk weird

CG: WOW, OKAY.

CG: HAVE *YOU* EVER NOTICED THAT I DON'T GIVE A SHIT?

TG: pff

===

TG: no listen because i got my ears scoping that shit im like a scouter for dude activity

TG: ok maybe me mentioning it to you is gonna fuck up your ecosystem or something but

TG: you have the heaviest feet of the century man

CG: I DO???

TG: just thrust them straight down into the ground like youre trying to homebrew a san andreas fault

TG: viciously tamping on tectonic plates hoping for top score on the richter scale

TG: waging war against solid particles and the basic flow of gravity

TG: i could ID those footfalls out of a million i mean it

CG: SERIOUSLY?

===

TG: i mean theres nothing wrong with it but

TG: yeah

CG: I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME RIGHT NOW.

TG: im not fucking with you striders honor

TG: when have i ever lied to anybody about anything

CG: NOT UNPACKING THAT QUESTION WITH YOU TODAY.

CG: BUT SHIT, HOLD ON. LET ME SEE.

TG: yeah take the umbrella go over there and just walk to me

CG: ON IT.

===

===

TG: see you just kinda slam em straight down dude

CG: THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY RIOTOUS FUCKING JOKE OF A LIFE.

TG: dont your feet ache

===

CG: MOOT POINT. THIS MIGHT SOUND INSANE BUT I'VE ACTUALLY HAD MY STRUT PODS FOR A WHILE. ANY KIND OF PAIN THIS WOULD'VE BEEN CAUSING WOULD BE TOTALLY FILTERED OUT OF MY SPONGE BY NOW AS BACKGROUND NOISE.

TG: damn i didnt think that through

TG: my shades

CG: ALRIGHT, GET BACK UNDER THE SHITTING UMBRELLA AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME.

TG: look ive fucked myself over here too i dont have shit to clean these with

TG: ugh

===

TG: guess its karma

CG: HOLY FUCK. HOW DID I NEVER NOTICE THIS BEFORE?

TG: i dunno but im gonna assume having a dad thats a literal crab monster is probably a contributing factor

TG: im guessing thats not a great role model for this kinda thing

TG: just conjecture i mean

CG: YOUR ENVY IS OVERWHELMINGLY OBVIOUS DAVE. AS A DISCLAIMER, HE WOULD'VE ABSOLUTELY KICKED YOUR ASS.

TG: yeah probably

CG: THAT'S PRETTY MUCH ALL THERE IS TO SAY ON THE MATTER.

===

TG: but see bro had me stringent on feather feets

TG: i bet i could slip across a bike horn warehouse with nary a fucking toot

CG: HAHA. ASSUMING YOU DON'T MAKE A TOTAL ASS OF YOURSELF, AS PER USUAL.

CG: IF YOU WEREN'T CONSTANTLY RUNNING YOUR GASH ABOUT EVERYTHING AND BEING AN INIMITABLE CLOWN I SERIOUSLY THINK YOU COULD BE ON PAR WITH YOUR CUSTODIAN.

CG: THAT IS A MONUMENTAL "IF".

TG: well look at it this way

TG: im basically doing you all a favor by being a dumbass

TG: never gonna get caught off guard by the bozo patrol

CG: WOW. GOOD POINT.

===

TG: also screw this can i use your shirt

TG: this stupid hoodie is just smudging my lenses up

TG: i cant see dick

CG: UH

CG: SURE, I GUESS.

TG: cool

===

TG: so yeah i could be prowling around like a goddamn verbal assassin sniping convos left and right

TG: but no ive got the decency to go bunp in the night

CG: YEAH.

CG: IT'S DEFINITELY COMPOUNDED BY THE CONSTANT INANE RAMBLINGS.

CG: BUT

CG: IT'S ACTUALLY PRETTY RELAXING, Y'KNOW? IT HAS ITS OWN RHYTHM.

TG: see yeah i sound it off and

===

TG: wait really?

CG: YEAH

CG: I DON'T KNOW

CG: FUCK. HOW DO I EXPLAIN THIS WITHOUT WANTING TO CRAM MY FROND DOWN MY PROTEIN CHUTE.

===

CG: IT'S LIKE

CG: A SALVE FOR MY AGGRAVATION SPONGE.

CG: YOUR VOICE IS THE HUMAN EQUIVALENT OF ASPIRIN.

TG: uh damn karkat hold your hoofbeasts i was talking about the rhythm thing

CG: ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT. I'M TAKING US BOTH THE FUCK OUT RIGHT NOW. YOU HAVE REACHED THE BAD END OF THIS CONVERSATION.

TG: you think thatd be heroic or just

CG: IF I WAS STILL GHOSTING AROUND THE RUINS OF SGRUB'S ARCANE FRIGGIN GAME SYSTEMS, THE COMPLETE LACK OF SHIT AFOOT NOWADAYS WOULD BORE ME TO DEATH.

CG: LIKE. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME OUR THERMAL HULL LEVELLED UP, DAVE?

TG: hah

===

TG: but uh

TG: i mean we had aspirin on earth

CG: NO, NUMBNUBS.

CG: I'M SAYING YOU ARE MY ASPIRIN.

TG: oh

CG: YEAH, TAKE THAT TO THE BANK AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR 20-KARAT ASS.

===

TG: heh

TG: well get this

TG: i will literally talk at you forever for free

TG: you got lifetime priority seating for the davealogues

TG: never gotta go to the drugstore again you can just get doped up on my dulcet tones for the rest of time

TG: take that and some of this

TG: im packin punches

CG: OW, FUCK! NO! MY MIGRAINES!

CG: SWEEPS OF VEINCLOTTING AND NERVEFRAYING DOWN THE FUCKING GAPER. BECAUSE OF YOU.

CG: YOU ASSHOLE, THIS IS THE WORST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME.

CG: AND YOU'RE LAUGHING.

TG: chuckle up it only gets worse from here

===

CG: BE HONEST WITH ME. DID FONDLING MY SHIRT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET EVEN DO ANYTHING?

TG: barely but yknow sometimes you just gotta deal the cards youre given

TG: ill just be astigmatic for a while its cool

CG: PFF… OKAY MAN.

[benderclub]

hey gamers sorry for not being very active all week my friend is planning a portfolio to move to an art school and its got me fucked up

[smutinlove]

bro i loved ur last carl x reader sm

*shy sensitive reader

what if carl and reader fight (maybe cuz she sneakes out of alexandria) then rick scolds him and he has to say sorry to her but she cant help but feel emotional

yes!!!!

im not entirely sure i did the shy part correctly but i tried!!! enjoy love<3

CARL GRIMES X READER

i call this:

"The one that got away"

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

You glanced at the walls that surrounded Alexandria. It was honestly pathetic. You couldn't necessarily go outside of the walls without permission. It angered you. Every small move you even thought about was supposed to be told to Carl and Rick first. Everything.

"Tell Rick."

"Tell the leader's son!" It was shitty.

You liked Carl. He was sweet. But sometimes he was an asshole.

You continued your walk around the walls of Alexandria. It pissed you off that you couldn't go outside. But... there was one way.

Maybe you could achieve a bit of freedom and independence in doing so.

You smirked and ran back to the group's house, passing Carl and Rick on the way. You went inside and opened the cabinet. You grabbed a knife and went back outside. It was still very sunny so you would definitely have time to come and go without being noticed.

You went to one of the walls that wasn't very heavily guarded. After a few attempts at climbing the wall, you finally did it, landing on the ground with a small "thud."

The fresh air was enticing. It was so peaceful. You could barely hear the words of the other Alexandrians. You decided to head into the woods, just to explore a bit. You had a knife with you so you'd probably be fine.

"Beautiful," you whispered as you watched a bird fly by. A tear of joy slipped down your cheek. Why? It was incredibly rare to see something so pure. Most birds are usually gutted by Walkers or killed, cooked, and eaten by those who were brave enough to survive.

You were about to continue walking when you felt something on your shoulder.

"Caught 'ya."

You let out a shriek. "Holy shit!"

It was... fucking Carl. "Having fun?" Carl asked with a hint of bitterness.

"What? You followed me?!" How could he follow you? It's not fair. You wanted one moment of peace... even if it was outside of the walls of Alexandria.

"Of course! You don't know what you're dealing with! These walkers... they've become more vicious!" You rolled your eyes. Like father like son.

"Shut up! You're so bitchy! Carl, you're always telling people what to do and it's so fucking annoying."

Stunned, he didn't say anything.

So you said, "Fuck you, Carl! Go to hell!" Tears threatened to fall down your cheeks, but you held them in.

"You ain't any better! Why would you even sneak out?!"

"To have some fucking freedom! The walls of Alexandria make me feel trapped. I feel like an animal caged up in there! And you... and your fucking father are taking over everything!" A few tears slipped down your cheeks, making you feeling hopeless.

He forcefully took a hold of your wrist, "We are going. Now."

Carl started dragging you, not caring about your protests or exclaims.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

You and Carl reached Alexandria in ten minutes due to his speedy pace.

By this point, you had fantasized about killing Carl in a hundred different ways. And you'd also shed a few more tears before he started yelling at you. Again.

You rushed inside, avoiding everyone.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

"You really had to yell at her?!" Rick scolded. There really was no reason for Carl to yell at you or talk to you in a disrespectful manner. "Well, no, but—"

"—But you need to apologize."

"She shouldn't have snuck out! It's dangerous," Carl retorted.

"And she is old enough to make her own decisions. I agree, it's dangerous and she shouldn't have snuck out. But that was her choice and you should have respected that." Carl stayed quiet this time, letting Rick finish.

"—You can't treat people like that, Carl. Son, I love you. But that was horrible. I want you to go apologize to her. Don't lose her 'cause you said something stupid. She's a good one. You do not wanna sit on a rocking chair at ninety and call her, the one that got away."

"I'm sorry, dad." Carl said. "I know. Now, go."

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Carl entered the house with the yellow door (group's house), Carl sighed and called out, "Hey, Y/N, are you here?"

You sat on the couch, curled up into a ball. Your cheeks were red and puffy from crying. "Hey, oh, Y/N," you heard from behind you.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean all that bullshit I said. I was horrible."

Carl sat down next to you, placing a hand on your shoulder. You looked up, eyes watering again. "Don't cry, please. I'm sorry. I'm the biggest asshole on the planet. I'm so fucking sorry, Y/N."

You nudged closer and wrapped your arms around him, hugging him tight. "I'm sorry," he whispered in your ear once more.

»»————<3———-««

damn guys

inside i was dying frrr

did anyone catch the catwoman/batman reference? :D

anyway this was fun!!! send more reqs yall<3333

he totally wants me<3

[mschimdt]

The Stripper

mike schmidt x f!reader

warnings: so much things man, m recieving, breeding kink? dom reader, stripping bro litteraly idk just read at your own risk

2.5k words

---------------------MINORS DNI-------------------

.

mikes been stressed out lately, his job as freddys going awfully, hes been working there for just over a week and the weird shit thats happened to him there is fucking insane

he caught the animatronics moving on the cameras once, blood stains everywhere (which he cleaned up) and then he met vanessa, she told him what type of shit goes down in this placr and now hes terrified, he only goes there to prove to his aunt that he can keep a job

today was jist an ordinary night, mike was doing a night shift as a security guard at freddys, he usually just slept through his shift because who the fuck wants to break into an old abandoned pizzarea?

apparently someone did, a loud smash woke him up, when he looked at the cameras, it was a group of teenagers exploring but one of them got the attention of the animatronics and is now throwing things at it trying to stop it from chasing him, he got cornered in a room, mike watched him get his upper body get bit off on thr cameras "oh shit" he whispered to himself he realized he had to leave, or he was next after those teenagers he checked the cameras once again, to see where the animatronics are not giving a shit about the people that broke in, when he made sure the animatronics were distracted, he made a run for it, towards the exit

thats where he saw vanessa, holding her gun "the fuck happened mike?" she said, aiming her gun at the hallway infront of them "s-some kids broke in- one of thems dead i sae him on the cameras!"

"shit, we need to get out of here" he was looking at her confused on why her eyes widened, he looked behind him, there was an animatronic rushing their way, "HOLY SHIT" he yelled, running for his life throigh the exit door, up the stairs, and into his car where he was struggling to put the keys in

once he managed to get them in, he quickly drove away, once he was far enough he picked up his phone and called vanessa to make sure she was okay

she picked up "hey vanessa u good?"

"yeah im fine, i dont think those kids are tho"

he spoke to her for a bit before ending the call, parking in some random area he didnt recognise , he sat there for a bit, head against the steering wheel as he processed what happens

'if i keep working there thag might happen to me' he thought

he was abut to leave the unknown area before he noticed a sign above him 'strip club huh' he thought to himself, it was still 3 am, after arguing with himself for a while, he convinved himself to go in.

he took out the car keys, leaving his car, as he walked in purple lights blinded his vision, as he adjusted, he realized the security guy at the door was asking for his ID, "may i have your ID sir?"

"yeah- yeah sure" he handed him his ID, the man read it and gave it back to him and noded, as mike walked in. there were men recieving blowjobs and lap dances

he seated himself on a couch facing the stage, where a woman was dancing, as she finished her preformance your name was called, your stage name 'play kitty' he thought to himself, what a weird choice , as you walked on, mike stared at you, not believing his eyes.

you were the most beautiful thing hes ever seen he stared at you dancing on the pole mesmerised by you

you looked at him, all the guys here were the regulars, exept him. you've never seen him here before, he had his arms crossed across his chest while he watched you

you made eye contact with him- quite a few times on accident, he was an attractive looking guy

you finally finishrd your preformance, walking off the stage, where alot of guys followed you begging you to get a room with them, but you replied "i dont do private bookings!" the guys were still pooling around youx a few leaving after they heard what u said, but a few stayed still begging.

mike got bavk to his senses 'why would a woman as beautiful as her want me when she has all these guys anyways' he said to himself, going to walk around the club to look around, he caught you walking somwhere in the corner of his eye, but he iust ignored you, he couldnt stop his breathing speeding up though, your clothes were really revealing. g string, with a string bra

he walked somewhere, and sat down. opening his phone to check with max and to make sure that abby was okay

he felt a tap on his shoulder, he turned his head around, eyes meeting your beautiful ones

"u-uh hi-?" hr said, nervousness in his voice, "can i sit down with you for a bit? never seen you here." you said "yeah- yeah sure"

you sat down next to him "so what brings you here" you said making eye contact with him, or trying to, because his eyes would meet yours for a few seconds then he'd just look away

"i dont really know honestly" his voice deep, sadness showing on it

"rough day?" you asked

"yeah kinda"

"what happened?" you asked "never mind- sorry i shouldnt be asking"

"no no its okay i needed someone to talk to anyways, uh something happened at work- something really shitty, you dont happen to know that one abandoned pizzarea? freddy fazzbears or something"

"no way! you work there? i used to go there as a kid, you said smiling "what happened there?"

"well, the animatronics are haunted or some shit, some kids broke in while i was on my night shift and they all got absolutley obliterated by the animatronics- weird shit"

"i heard they were haunted, never thought it was real, yeah right whats your name?"

"mike" he replied "whats yours?"

"my stage names play kitty- weird i know, my actual names (Y/N)"

you had a little conversation, exchanged numbers, and mike left, he was definetley coming back here

it was 5 am now, mike drove home, as usual, doing his usual things

the day after, he went to work, he couldnt stop thinking about you, thats when you texted him

"hey mike its (y/n)!"

he picked yp his phone and read the message, then he replied

"hey y/n whats up"

"u coming today ;) ?"

"probably, not sure yet gotta finish work first"

"ill take that as a maybe, see you there"

you said, it was 3am again, "fuck this" mike abandoned his shift, locking up the outside of the pizzarea

he drove back to the club, walking in again the man standing at the door let him in, recognising him from yesterday

he walked in, you were on stage, when you saw him walk in, you eyes brightened, a smirk growing across your face

you continued your preformance, having collected a little bit over a thousand dollars from the guys there

you walked off, heading straight to mike, "you came!" you said with a smile

"why wouldnt i come back? couldnt resist a girl as beautiful as you-" he just said that- 'what the fucks wrong with me' he thought to himself "shit sorry"

u smirked "whyre you apologising? ur pretty cute mike" you said, chuckling afterwards

'she just said that? what?' he thought as you both made your way to a table to sit down

"what made you become a stripper- dont answer if you dont want to its fine" mike asked

"nah its alright, i just needed a but of extra money, i live alone and one job wasnt enough, plus i couldnt bare always staying alone at night- now im never alone im just followed around by desperate guys, theyre annoying but theyre the source of my income" you said

"my shifts almost over, if you want you can come to my place and we can continue talking there? id like to get to know you mike"

"yea- yeah sure why not" he said, shocked at your question, youve barely known him for a day and youre already inviting him to come over

you packed your things up, "mike u got a car with you? my friend drove me here today and im pretty sure she left aa bit ago- she told me"

"yeah sure, gimme ur house adress ill drive us there" he said

u got into mikes car, u told him the adress. he drove yoy both there , parking outside your house

you ooened the door, letting him in, as he walkes through the enterance, he noticed the house displayed your personality very well, clean and organised " alright gimme a second lemme set this stuff up in my room, you can come if you want to" mike nodded, following you into your room, he realized you were just a normal girl, trying to get some extra money to keep things running

" so mike, you got any siblings" mike froze for a second, remembering garret "you okay"

"yeah sorry, i have 2, or 1 techinaccly" "oh! im sorry for asking-"

"no its okay, it was a while ago, he was kidnapped infront of me i was 13, he was 8"

"im sorry mike.. what about your other sibling"

"yeah abby, shes 9, im doing the security gig to keep her, i beat up a guy at a mall last year and i lost my job, and i was going to lose guardianshio over her due to my aunt, so i have to work this shitty job now to prove i can keep a job"

you put your hand on mikes thigh, mike took a deep breath, looking down at your hand on his dark blue jeans, "are you okay mike"

"yeah im fine just somethings on my mind" he said, looking down onto his lap, where your hand rested, you pretended to not notice his growing erection, -shit shit shit' mike panicked he tried to cover it eirh his hands butyou grabbed him gently by the chin, turning his face to look at you, "you need some help with that?" you said, a smirk wide across your face "w-what do you mean?" mike tried to act confused, his face turning red "with this?" you placed your hand onto the growing tent in his pants

the moment your hand touched his erection, he threw his head back, letting out a soft moan "looks like you do" you said, climbing onto his lap, he rested his arms on your hips as you grinded your clothes cunt on his clothed erection

he let out soft moans, his head thrown back, his hands squeezing your hips you leaned down to his ear "whats wrong mikey? feels good?" you said, kissing his earlobe, making your way down his neck

you reached a hand under his shirt, exploring his torso, your hand wandering up and down it

"take it off" you said, mike obeyed, pulling his shirt over his head, revealing his bare chest, light abs across his stomache, you continued kissing his neck, reaching his colar bone where you sucked and nipped making him release liw whimpers, creating a hickey, "gosh mike keep making those sounds and i wont spare you" you said, smirking across his chest, taking in his scent

he smelled like cologne, mixed with the smell of sweat

mikes strong arms wrapped aroundd your waist as you make your way down his chest , and stomache, without hesitation, you slipped your shirt off

mikes facial expression changed, he looked at your tits, then he looked away again "you can look mike its okay"

you made your way, kissing down his stomache, once you finally reached his v line you said "lay down mike, let me make you feel good"

he listened, once he layed down, you unbuckled his belt, and pulled off his pants, leaving his boxers on

you started palming his dick through his boxers, you could tell he was trying his best to keep quiet.

"dont hold back your noises baby, i wanna hear you" you said as you slipped your finger under the waist band of his boxers, slowly pulling them down, his cock sprung out free, he was big, so big, 7 inches minimum

you wrapped your hand around the top of his dick, placing your thumb on the tip wiping away the precum, "mmph" you slowly leaned down, parting your lips, wrapping then around his erect cock, you took as much of his dick as you could in your mouth, you could feel your wetness through your panties

you bobbed your head up and down, making mike release the most lewd noises youve heard a man make. and you quite enjoyed it, "o-oh my go- mph-d im close! im close!"

you just kept going at the same speed, bobbing your head up and down, you felt mikes dick twitch in your mouth, you knew he was close

he looked down at you

you let his dick out of your mouth, stroking it with your hands till he came

streaks of white painted your face and his stomache

"holy shit" was all he said, he rested his arms next to him looking down at you

"one more time? in my pussy this time?"

"yes please" as soona s you whard those words, your pants were already off , panties slipping off with them, mike stared at you completely bare "goddamn" he whispered to himself, you positioned yourself above himx slowly lowering yourself onto his dick, his strong arms held you as his length slid down inside of you

you adjusted, and soon enoughc you were bouncing uo and down his dick, the only sound in the rokm was the slapping noisea from both your bodys and the moans you both let out , your hands supporting you on mikes chest

mikes hand reached down to your pussy. fingers making contact with your slick clit, rubbing circles onto it

"shit mike im close-" "me too" he said throwing his head back to let our another moan

you came first, the knot in your stomache coming undone.

mike remembered he wasnt wearing a condom, "im not we-wearing- shit. a condom." he said oanting between each word

"cum inside me" you said, leaning down and kissing his lips, swallowing all his moans and he came close to releasing his load

he moaned into your mouth, before releasing the warm whiye liquid into your used cunt, you bounced up and down his dick for a bit morw helping him ride out his high, before you collapsed onto him.

after a few minutes, you both cooled down, he pulled himself out, watchinf the cum drip from your cum

he looked at you and all he said was "we should do this again sometime"

-------------------------------------------------------

part 2?

[fortemelody]

AHHHSHFBTKFNTLFKGNFMDM SONIC 3 TRAILER SONIC 3 TRAILER SONIC 3 TRAILER IM LOOSING MY SHIT RN

here’s some things i noticed/wondered/loved:

- i think in that scene where tom is on the ground yelling for sonic, he is wearing a special forces suit. maybe he upgraded from cop to working with gun?? if so i think that’s a really good use of his character actually! he wanted to save a life and raise a family above all else yes, but he still got his previous dream of doing more serious cop work!

- shadow just. has a big ass portal?? like holy shit he’s just suckin the life outta earth and ig that’s one way to do it (or maybe it’s just a ring and i’m stupid idek)

- i’m sure we’ll learn more about this in the actual movie so i’m not too worried, but i’m super confused at the very beginning scene. apparently sonic didn’t change his heart…but he did tho? like he learned what being a true hero meant in the last movie. tbh i feel like that’s enough but hey i’m not against more character development for our boy so!! (also that bit where he’s like “in my lungs” was actually really funny to me, ben schwartz’ awesome delivery caught me off guard)

- GERALD ROBOTNIK ALIVE HUUUUH?! tbh i would’ve preferred if maria was alive, i feel like that would be an interesting dynamic. but also ig that would make it harder for shadow to learn anything so i totally get it. anyways i’m just glad they’re putting a little twist on the story, it keeps it interesting. they already sorta did that with the knuckles and iblis thing actually! (even if that show sucked ass and although that probably wasn’t intentional 😭)

- even tho bro only got like… 3 lines, i really think keanu fits shadow. he’s very soft spoken in comparison to the rest of the case which feels nice. also he’s like the “really bad” guy so ofc he’s not gonna be yappin on and on like sonic or robotnik and he’s gonna take things uber seriously.

- where was my girl maddie :( i think she was only in like a singular frame. hope shes in the movie a somewhat significant amount. i heart pretzel lady!! could live without wade tho like pls im so sick of his bowling soap opera 💀

- FAT ROBOTNIK FAT ROBOTNIK FAT ROBOTNIK!!! after fucking 3 movies they finally fulfilled jim carrey’s wishes!! let the man get creative like please i love jim carrey sm aughdfhfnfmschxj. also love how we got so much stobonik content within that short scene like jesus come get y���all’s food

- shadow at one point says something along the lines of “when we’re done, there won’t be anything left.” maybe i’m reading WAY to into this but what does the “we’re” part mean?? is he working with others? i feel like this is either gonna be team dark or some new movie exclusive character(s). edit: someone made a valid point that he’s actually probably referring to gerald (look at reblogs!)

-CHAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lowkey wonder if the room therye in is like an amusement park or somethin like that

- no sign of amy :( but honestly my prediction now is that she’s gonna be the post credit scene teaser cus they always do a new character reveal there. first tails, then shadow. and honestly now i think it might be better that way so shadow can have a chance to breathe and show his story in full. i’m pretty sure i vaguely remember colleen (tails’ VA) being kinda mysterious about amy’s appearance when asked, and also the fact that it was confirmed that this isn’t the end of the movie franchise/universe. but ig we’ll just have to wait and see!

so sorry i stated this yesterday morning to give my initial thoughts but then got busy and completely forgot to post/finish it. and today i started (and am close to finishing) a very long edit of the trailer, so be on the look out for that too!

genuinely i feel like this movie is gonna somehow be even more record breaking than any of the previous movies and i am so here for the hype 🙏

[ranfordgallus]

SPOILERS FOR THE NEW WILD KRATTS MOVIE "our blue and green world"

Dude i just finished this fucking series and its...its so much im losing my mind rn/pos

This picture makes me wanna pull the trigger what is my life without them yall

Okok...heres my opinions on the new movie↓

I honestly love how we get to see more chris and martin fighting, usually the other fights are like...it doesnt last long but THIS where they just seperate eachother i went crazy like WHAT

Paisleys character development is CRAZY BRO like i thought I'd never see a villain like...change their ways from what i remember from wild kratts

Its crazy that i actually started sympathizing her like holy shit i love the character development, she used to be my second hated character (first is zach) and that scene where she changed her mind on being a villain i was blown away honestly, there are alot of villain in wk that i feel sympathetic for but zach is just the most unlikeable villain i could ever meet

Honestly my complaint is that zach is there, hes like a pest or a parasite i need him terminated this is a kratt brothers episode this does NOT have to have zach crawling in there like GTFO LET ME HAVE MY SIBLING ANGST DAMNIT

And also when chris and martin started singing....now this is my opinion but im not a big fan when characters sing out of nowhere like musical scenes whatever you call it because you never see an episode where a character has a musical scene in wk until now so i got caught off guard LMAO

And thats all i had to say honestly, i love this movie, probably the best movie yet im so glad wild kratts kept feeding me more of that wkcocain to snort on i love it

[livlaughloveluke]

𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐬- 𝐞.𝐥

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: ethan doesn’t believe in love at first sight until he sees you

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: lil cursing, non!ghostface ethan, a short lil fluff

𝐚/𝐧: hopefully this one is a little cuter since the last one was kinda sad 🥴💘 not proofread either! also should next imagine be jack or another ethan?

ethan was sitting in the kitchen, scrolling through instagram on his phone. it was a friday night, and while most college kids were out partying, he was alone in his dorm. he had recently moved from california to attend the university. since he had moved on his own, he didnt know anyone in new york.

he had met his roommate , chad, the previous week. chad was friendly, but he was out with his friends most of time. speaking of which, where was chad tonight? 

while ethan was brainstorming possibilities, the door handle started jiggling, and chad and a group of around six entered, all laughing. 

however, the first thing ethan noticed was you.

your luscious hair slightly bounced as you walked inside with the group, and your bubbly aura immediately filled the room. 

ethan was completely unaware that chad was returning with friends, and was severely caught of guard by their presence. panic filled his mind when he realized what he was wearing. he thought he looked so childish, with his pajama pants and white wife beater. 

you however, thought he look amazing. he was so effortlessly gorgeous, with long, curly brown locks that draped over his forehead beautifully. 

when chad saw ethans freaked out look, he immediately started apologizing for not warning him. 

“holy shit man, im so sorry! i totally forgot to mention that they were coming over for a movie tonight.” chad says, panicking a little. everyone in the room was now fully aware of ethans awkward presence, and glared at him. 

“uh- its no problem. i can go hang out in my room or something. or if you want me to leave the dorm, thats okay too! i can maybe go the store or to-“ ethan stuttered out, now embarrassed and looking at the floor, before he was cut off by another voice. 

“ethan, right? you should join us! we were thinking about watching a horror movie, if you wanted to watch with us.” you say to the shy boy, who lifted his head up, now looking at you.

holy shit. he didn’t believe in love at first sight until he saw you there, the dim lighting somehow enhancing your features. cheesy, i know. but how could he not fall for you? you were caring, and not to mention, absolutely gorgeous. 

“yeah i’d love to!” ethan exclaimed, quickly realizing how desperate he sounded. you only giggled, settling his nerves.

the group was now spread out in the living room, debating what movie to watch. everyone had introduced themselves to ethan, and from listening to them, he concluded that everyone seemed pretty chill. 

anika and mindy were cuddled up together on one side of the couch, with tara and chad on the other side, also snuggling. sam was in her own recliner, which left you and ethan on the floor in the living room. you both sat in beanbag chairs that were very close together, making his heart speed up. 

everyone decided that The Conjuring was a good choice, so chad turned it on. it was around midnight, and with every minute you could feel your eyelids getting heavier and heavier. 

as the movie played, you started to subconsciously close your eyes and lean your head on ethans shoulder. 

your simple actions nearly caused the poor boys lungs to burst, butterflies swarming his stomach. he could no longer focus on the movie, for he was concentrated on keeping you asleep and comfortable. 

however, he wasnt a big night owl, and started to drift off into sleep, too. he rested his head on top of yours, and quickly fell into a deep slumber.

by the end of the movie, you both somehow turned in your sleep, and ended up on the same beanbag, cuddling. your head laid on his chest, and his arms were wrapped loosely around your waist. both deep asleep, probably dreaming about one another.

while the credits played, the group shifted their attention from the screen to you and ethan. well, everyone except anika, because she too had fallen asleep on mindys shoulder.

quiet “awws” echoed from most of the friends, besides mindy, who wasn’t big on other’s relationships. tara was busy thinking, and came to the conclusion that you and him would make the cutest couple.

chad however wasn’t big on thinking, and whipped out his phone to take a picture of the pair. everyone looked at him, a little confused, while he held the biggest grin on his face.

when he noticed everyones facial expressions, he explained his reasoning.

“what? this will be a cute photo for when they start dating!” he blurts out.

the group laughs, and they decide to all spend the night at the boys dorm, because of how late it was, and how tired they all were. 

chad was right. when you and ethan made it official a few months later, the photo never failed to stain his cheeks with a bright red hue.  

[casually-slips-into-coma]

spoilers for iwtv s2e5!!!

initial thoughts throughout:

dubai armand in this ep specifically seems a lot happier than normal. very smiley and kind of excited? like more energy than usual. mans was ready to eat

this fucking turtleneck

loumand library dates

hypnotized security as one does

i like that armand likes to hunt his kills. thought it was a cool detail

made me think of when armand tells daniel to run in the book

daniel was there for gay sex the drugs were just a bonus

he barely registered the coffin. he was like ok ig

the zodiac killer lol

daniel struggling to get the tape out of the plastic lmao

some coke for the gums just in case

you were lonely louis (gagged him)

the extreme change in vibe from daniel shitting himself about louis being a vampire to him laughing along while louis complains about his ex

book quotes!!

daniel validating louis complaining about lestat. theyre just gossiping at this point

BIG time asshole

daniel making A Point and then going sorry and louis saying no,,,,,that🫵was astute🗣🗣

“can u do the fang thing again? i love that, man” hes just like me fr

dangerously unstable psyche ((clocked))

im kinda with her get off that bench brother😭 [about claudia leaving]

jacob the actor you are

ok this whole argument between louis and armand was insane and i replayed it like a million times

kinda love louis coked tf out

being called boring fucking hurts thats a wild argument

he called you a soft beige pillow suffocating him girl u gotta stand up

armand really locked on to the word fascinating

louis said lick my boots😝

gremlin sighting👀

“chop my hands off”👀👀👀👀

picking LINT❓❓off the sofa⁉️ ⁉️

armand mocking him “oh its so hard to be me, its so hard to kill humans, i can feel her feelings as i drain her, louis de point du lac, everyone i know wronged me!”

imitating each others accents

my vampire daddy groomed me into a little bitch holy fuck when they go low i go lower

THE NAME!! the name!! unuttered in our home for 23 years said over and over again until it was pounding in my brain like a hammer!!!!

assad deserves every award my man was actiiiinnggg

she didnt love you/i know

louis :(((

“can u hear her? shes calling me…” ok what if i kms

and then louis runs into the sunlight🙃

hello loml: practical effects

sidestep the big picture get the story straight first daniel said lets lock the fuck in rn we gotta focus

“you said the worst things youve ever said to me” hes just a sopping wet cat

hes fine youre fine this is fine youre all fine

finally seeing unhinged armand ive prayed for times like these

i stand by my cancelled wife btw

small detail of different memories: in louis’ version he apologizes to armand and armand says “meaningless word” and then moves on to talk about the slanted floor. in daniel’s version he remembers the dead guy and the same scene plays out except armand explains he killed the neighbor in between “meaningless word” and how the floor is slanted

vibrating eyes

LOVING how this episode is shot. all the different angles and the camerawork and the fucking MUSIC

canon that louis fucks guys and then kills them fic writers get to it

“128 boys hes brought here—“ “he said it was 5🥺”

daniel basically saying look man ill suck ur dick if u let me go

and then armand making him kneel

armand so unnerving <3

i know its kinda dumb to point out but i love small details of vamp power. specifically how armand picked up that table like it weighed nothing and when he picked up louis

love the idea of louis being like ok just put your feet in the rocks itll help

sopping wet cat armand!!!

but also he really let louis suffer for days instead of just giving him blood to ease the pain😬

lestats voice caught me off guard genuinely

interesting that armand knows where lestat is. i wonder how the show is gonna go about it. is he in the ground??

and refusing to pass along the i love you message……….theres layers here

u left me for death :((

have i atoned for my part of paris👀👀

the armand daniel bite was very do u know what it means to be loved by death

itty bitty armand fangs

need him alive as a testament to our companionship wtf are we even talking about anymore

arun/maitre😵‍💫

the fucking sunglasses im pissing😭😭

he got that shit on tho

welcome back trinity from the matrix

also just the fact that armand came back like yum i had so much fun on that hunt😁 anyway what are you two up to😇☺️

and louis and daniel just had a harrowing 2 hours trying to recover lost memories and coming to the realization that theyve been mega gaslit for decades

armand saying exactly what louis told daniel word for word

a hunch🫢

i love this show

im so excited for next weeks episode this story is unfolding so beautifully. im even more curious now about why and how this second interview is happening. ((also am very confused/curious about what looks like a protest in the promo??))

[running-tweezers]

Ok time for the DamiHux bitch to relisten to the DamiHux Bonus Audio for the 3rd time and record her every thought

(NSFW obvs, minors DNI)

First of all I feel like the opening of this one is a great opportunity to remind everyone of this little thing I managed to write bc holy shit. Good Morning.

Huxley’s sleepy morning voice is so fucking cute 😭

The way they laugh together!!!! They’re in love!!

Damien dodging saying he’s “the handsomest” in every way possible, but Hux is NOT letting him off the hook. Huxley really said “I am going to help give this man the self-confidence he deserves, so help me god”

When they call each other baby??? My brain = 2 liter of Diet Coke, ‘Baby’ = a pack of Mentos. It happened so much in this one I thought I was gonna take off into the atmosphere.

Damien with the Uno Reverse Card Surprise. No You.

It’s their 2 year anniversary I’m gonna cry.

“I’ve been known to swallow my pride.” “You’ve been known to swallow more than that.” Ay Yo

“Dress for a hike” “Why?” “…… bc we’re going for a hike, baby.” “Oh! 😄” Huxley the man you are.

They’re both graduated!!! And they have careers!!! Damien’s working at DAMN!!! He’s trying to fix things like he’s always wanted to!!! They’ve both come so far!!!

“I’m here to help pull you back onto steady ground” What if I cried

The WAY I have wanted these two to fuck outside like that non-canon Huxley BA!!!!!! FINALLY!!!

“Come on Nature Boy. Let’s get natural” DAMIEN PLS

Damien using his powers to turn the water into a natural hot tub, I CAN’T

THAT SMACK CAUGHT ME SO OFF GUARD OH MY GOD. HUXLEY

Hux is so sweet I’m getting a cavity. I don’t care tho, rot my teeth out, big guy.

THE THROAT GOAT RETURNS -air horn noises-

I swear every time Damien engages Throat Goat mode, Huxley sounds like he’s ready to write his goddamn vows.

“Pick me up. Turn us around. Press me into this wall. And Fuck. Me.” WE LOVE A POWER BOTTOM DAMIEN MOMENT

I’d like to introduce you to my favorite thing in the world ✨Damien Whimpering✨

The IMMEDIATE concern from Huxley when he said the rock was digging into his back??? And the healing??? I don’t think we’ve ever seen Hux heal before??? HELLO?? Aftercare King?? I’ll cry??

THEY ARE SO IN LOVE IM GONNA THROW UP /POS

Also HUXLEY HAPPY TRAIL CONFIRMED LETS GO BOYS

In conclusion: this is my new favorite piece of Damien/Huxley anything he has ever made, they are disgustingly cute and in love, and I’m never gonna stop being feral and annoying about them bc they’re everything in a ship I’ve ever loved, thank you goodnight.

[akazzzaa]

Hii ^_^ I love you're writing and I was wondering if you could write an Enmu x fem reader smut where reader has thicc thighs if you're comfortable doing that

Hello! Thank you for enjoying my writing, it means a lot

Summary- Enmu x Fem! Thick! Reader

Genre- SMUT

Warnings- NSFW content//MDNI//Obsession// Stalking//Mentions of blood// Cunnilingus// Body worship// Scent kink

A Dream Come True

Enmu loves your thick thighs, it's what caught his attention the most. A feature that seemed to defy the conventional standards of beauty and left an indelible mark on his twisted desires.

Enmu, usually consumed by a relentless thirst for blood, found himself entranced by the uniqueness of this mortal's physical form. This led him to observe you from the shadows, ensuring he remained unseen.

As the days went by, Enmu's fascination transformed into an obsession. In his twisted mind, he began to see them as a symbol of power and grace.

Unbeknownst to you, Enmu watched every move, studying the way you carried yourself and admiring the strength in your stride. He was drawn to you confidence, resilience, and the way you embraced your own body, thick thighs and all.

One night, unable to contain his desires any longer, Enmu decided to reveal himself. Instead of attacking like he normally would, he approached with an eerie calmness.

You where obviously startled by his sudden appearance and was ready to put up a fight, but Enmu didn't seek violence. Instead, he knelt before you. In his twisted way, he professed his admiration for your unique beauty, particularly fixating on your thighs. He spoke of how they symbolized strength and resilience to him, something he found both fascinating and alluring.

Initially sceptical and on guard, you listened as Enmu expressed himself. Enmu's twisted admiration, though unsettling, carried a strange sincerity.

Enmus hand reached up to grab your hips and pulled you closer to him and you willingly walked closer him. You never had a man so into your body before, and the worship of your figure felt really good. Enmu put his face in-between your crotch and inhaled deeply, '' You smell amazing-let me taste you, worship you, let me show you how beautiful you are'' You look down at him and nod and straight away he begins to pull your skirt up and licks your clit. His one hand had a mouth on it, and began to roam around your thighs as the mouth licked, kissed, and nibbled on your soft flesh. Emnu wanted to take a bite so bad but this is so much better. His other hand began to work his way to your ass to squeeze it. You could feel yourself coming close from him sucking on your clit.

''Holy shit- keep going im gonna c-cum''

Enmu moans into your pussy and keeps his pace needing you to cum in his mouth, your thighs clench around his head, threatening to crush his skull and he was going to loose it, he is finally where he's been dreaming off.

Only now he realised he was close to, his dick pressed up against his trousers creating a tension. You relentlessly grind into his face and moan as you come. He opens his mouth and sticks his tounge in your pussy, making sure he doesn't waste a drop of his hard work. He was like a starved man, and you were feeding him.

You try to catch your breath and hold onto Enmu for support as you come back from your high, '' Do you want to come on them?'' Enmu looks like he's going to pass out, his face beet red and he nods, standing up to face you and pulls his pants down to revel his cock.

You lift your skirt up and hold it giving you both a view of his dick sliding between your thighs. The cum and saliva making your thighs slippery for him to thrust and grind onto you. He was a whimpering mess, his head between you neck sucking on the drum of your pulse was to much for him and came all on your thighs, marking you as his.

''Sh-shit I didn't mean to cum that much'' He collapsed onto you, making you hold him in place so you both don't fall, ''its okay, I got you''

A/N- I have no idea how to write the ending of this or the aftercare : / My smut writing still needs work its just so awkward to write omg I hope its okay

[winwintea]

how wayv would react if you showed up at their doorstep covered in bl**d with a g*n

how wayv members would react if you showed up at their doorstep covered in bl**d with a g*n. PAIRING ▸ wayv x reader 

TRIGGER WARNINGS ▸ mentions of: bl//d (o) and g/ns (u), very angsty

AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ i watched the winwin and ten lovely dance cover again and cried because im an emotional trainwreck... REGARDLESS. idk actually how this prompt came to me but damn

Qian Kun

Kun’s lips are pursed together, his eyes widen at the sight of you. With your blood stained cheeks, mixed with your murky tears, you were covered head to toe in… red. He looks you up and down before demanding angrily, “WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?” His voice is loud and clear, and you can’t help but choke up a few sobs in response, unable to answer him. Kun grabs the gun out of your hands, and embraces you in a tight hug. This time his voice begins to crack and it’s a lot softer, “What did you do…?”

Ten

Ten was so caught off guard by the blood, he didn’t even notice the gun in your hands. “Holy SHIT! What the hell, y/n?” Strings of curses followed, but you couldn’t do anything but just sob uncontrollably. Ten gazes into your teary eyes. It’s hard to see your face clearly, since it’s covered in blood. Although Ten had no idea what you did, you had come to him for help. He grabs your shoulders and presses his face close to yours, and gives you a comforting smile, “Come inside. I’ll get you cleaned up.” He would be your rock. He would be your shield. He would protect you. Always.

Dong Si Cheng

Winwin has mixed feelings as soon as he sees you at the door. He’s definitely shocked, but hides it well. The gun was directed towards Winwin, but your hands were shaking, trembling. You were a wreck, a blubbering mess. He places his hand upon yours, slowly lowering the gun. “Why don’t you put the gun down and tell me what happened?” His voice has a soothing and calming edge to it. He embraced you in a hug, rubbing your back, as he whispered in your ear, “It’s going to be okay.” And that’s almost enough to make you believe his words. Almost.

Xiao De Jun

Xiaojun cursed as soon as he saw you. “Woah…” He held his hands up in defense, eyeing you carefully. His eyes nervously glanced around the area, wondering if any of his neighbors might take notice. You remained silent, your shaky fingers still wrapped around the gun.  The scent of blood fills the air, which Xiaojun notices as quite fresh. Once his shock has worn over, he finally breaks the silence, “Are you going to tell me what happened or are we going to be here all day?”

Wong Kun Hang

Hendery is just at a loss for words. The first thing he says to you, trying to process everything going on in front of him is, “Oh. That looks… messy.” (no shit) Hendery stands there awkwardly, not sure of what to do. He looks into your eyes and stares back at his reflection. There’s nothing left he realizes. Whatever you did, whatever caused this mess… didn’t matter. You would never be the same. The person he once knew, was gone. Lost forever. And he could never get you back. 

Liu Yang Yang 

Yangyang hadn’t expected you to turn up at his doorstep, much less covered in blood. “I’m trying not to freak out… but is the blood yours?” You shook your head, and he stared at you, in awe for a second. He put his hands around your shoulders, and felt how much you were shaking. Not wanting to disturb the neighbors, he brought you inside, wrapped a towel around your body, and quickly filled a bucket with water so he could wash you off. “Yangyang…” You called out to him, your voice still trembling, “Do you trust me?"

[pocket-watcher]

ugh, i have an idea that sounds really good in my head but im worried it'll sound cringe on paper...

so sub who has a comfort video game for the reason that they're hopelessly in love with one of the characters

favorite character somehow notices sub's feelings from their side of the fourth wall, trances them, and pulls them into the game world

(bonus points if both sub and fave character!dom are both fem)

》 @/seraphim-in-the-matrix

Please never be worried about cringe. Being cringe is to be human!!!

I’m sure I can deliver on this! Here ya go:

My PC whirred to life as I fit my pink headphones over my ears.

Finally, I thought to myself. No chores, no work, I finally get to just sit here and play.

My cursor hovered over the icon. I mentally checked I had a drink, some snacks, and that my phone was on silent.

I booted up the game.

The screen whirred to life, with bright colours, and there she was on the title screen.

Okay, so she might not be the main character, but she still was so lovely. Her sultry eyes, her outfit, it was perfect.

Or… would’ve been, if she was real. But I pushed that out of my mind and loaded into my current save.

“Welcome back, Kylie! 💕” the text read, her avatar bobbing up and down, her giant blonde curls landing a second after her body. I smiled at the screen, fiddling with my braids for a second.

I clicked through as the characters flitted their day to day, waiting to see her again. Of course, I’d played through about 60 times, so I knew exactly where to focus my attention.

“Oh! You’re here!” She said. Her avatar no longer in her regular outfit but I’n a more relaxed one reserved for her home scenes.

She looked so cute in her sweats and with her hair up. This was the baking portion of the game.

I was just about to start the mini game when my phone pinged. I thought it was on silent?! I picked it up, annoyed at the disruption when -

“Holy shit.”

I read and reread the notification again and again. They were making a sequel?!

I read the article three times to ensure I digested all the information possible.

“Uh, Kylie?” The text prompter read, her avatar now in a more curious pose than her usual excitable one.

That was weird. I’d never seen that pose before, but then again I don’t think I’d ever waited this long on one of her text screens before.

I turned my attention back to the article to ensure I hadn’t missed some mention of her character in the sequel.

“Kylie!” The text prompted flashed again. She was getting annoyed now, so cute in her little pose. I took a moment staring at the screen. Was this a new update?

That was when the screen glitched for a second. Bright colours filled the room.

I clicked to try and start the mini game. Nothing.

“Now do I have your attention?” The text read.

And another flash. I blinked, caught off guard.

I hit my computer, trying to fix the screen error.

That was when the flashing lingered.

Bright colours flashed in quick succession. Words I couldn’t quite read in time were hidden in there. I leaned in closer, cocking my head. Did I break the game?

It seemed to draw me in… I felt my head growing heavy - maybe it was just my headphones. I noticed my mouth was hanging open. It was then I started to process some of the text amongst the flashing lights.

“You’re doing so well!”

“I know you want me.”

“You’re mine.”

“Don’t you want to join me?”

“It would feel so nice to obey.”

My thoughts were at a standstill. Bring replaced by the flashing words and lights. The music was getting louder. My body felt like pins and needles.

And then it all stopped.

I looked around, no longer in my room, and big blonde curls filling my blurred vision.

“I can’t believe it worked!” She helped me up, steadying me as I swayed from lightheadedness.

“Come on, Kylie! This is going to be so much fun!!”