#hmm.. i dont know. im not good under time pressure either.. like.. there is such a short span of time now where everything will change

[bruiisedfawn]

₊˚ 🍮 ⋅ ☆.𖥔 ݁ ˖

[ray-the-fanatic]

2k12 tmnt for the fandom asks

(sorry i haven't answered yours yet, been having an off day but i'll get to it soon 🙏)

(lol no worries take your time friend!)

SEND ME A FANDOM

 I’ll tell you:

The first character I first fell in love with:  I feel the answer is well know XD I love Raph! I mean makes sense he was my favorite in 03 but I turly loved what 2012 did with him as well. He such a cocky shit at the start of the show and its not that he stops that trait but you do see how he develops for the better as the shown went on. Him feeling he was better and should be leader to how he more takes to his role in his team. You see him go from someone who cracks under pressure when given leadership to making sure he's always prepared, how he makes sure none of them esp Leo are left behind how he lets his softer side come out more when Chompy comes in. HE's also a little smart ass and people need to let him cuss he's had it u-u

The character I never expected to love as much as I do now: 

Shinigami, I sort of dropped off watch 2012 during season 4 so I didn't see her much outside a few epsiode I caught here and there. I havent quite gotten to when she is in the show now either outside clips and such I have seen. But I expected me to feel as I do Renet shes fine but there. Honestly though? I love her. I like how she isn't the usual gloom and doom but even laughs at Mikey's jokes i dunno I just enjoy her.

The character everyone else loves that I don’t: 

Renet, I wouldn't say I hate her. Much how I just wasn't much for the 03 version I would say gose the same in 12. I like her just fine shes a fun charater for the episodes she comes in for and such mostly love the season 5 monter arch. I personlly love her most for the fact she shares a VA with Terra from Teen Titans so it was like getting Beast Boy and Terra back. She just there she's fine I dont find her annoying but Im not hyped about her personally myself.

The character I love that everyone else hates: 

I wouldn't say he is hated but I do see Casey tends to not get much love or people will makes statments about him I just don't agree with like saying he is selfish and uncaring. When you do see that isn't ture. You learn that he and raph talk about stuff like what happened to spike. You see hes the one April talks when at the time who she thought was her mom wanted to leave and she had to pick to stay or go with her. Casey dose care about the turtles he often right there when they need help, he covers them in their battles and like the nightmare episode from the farm house arch he was ready to beat an old man for possibly being the reason they were going to die. I genuinely just love Casey my re watch has made me love him even more I just can't get over his stupid laugh sometimes XD

The character I used to love but don’t any longer:

Slash, NOT that I hate him either I thought he was villain longer though? but he had such a sudden turn around and it felt like such a waste to me. I felt like he could have been good as Raph arch enemy over Xever. Could been used to add to Raph and Casey friendship/partnership. I still like Slash I just wish he had been a villain a bit longer just for all untap story he had to offer.

The character I would totally smooch: 

Give all the turtles smooches on their heads they been through it in this shown u-u

The character I’d want to be like: 

hmmm mr murakami? I dunno dude seems to be enjoying live got hos own businesses willing to make stuff for the turtles he seems chill despite getting dragged into stuff from just knowing the turtles.

The character I’d slap: 

-Raph I love my boy but he needs to be slapped u-u

-Leo also needs a slap sometimes

-Casey he exsits hit em

-Donnie i love him to but smack this boy A pairing that I love:

Rasey uwu I love these two no matter the series I gotta ship these idiots im a sucker for the best friends to lovers trope A pairing that I despise:

hmm I don't think I have any sure theres some I dont ship or personally like much but eh cant say I have a ship I like hate you know? Besides I rather spend time enjoy what I love anyway.

[heyitsphoenixx]

People want to get to know you better

tagged by @tony-caito and a couple others i think whom i do not remember my b

Relationship status: single

Favorite color(s): if u couldn’t tell by the everything about me its currently hot pink and has been for a while now but it changes

Song stuck in your head: joyriding - fiatc

Last thing you googled: four letter words (was looking for knuckle tatts ideas. as i said the spirit of frank possessed me)

Time: 3:39pm

Last book you read: currently reading watchmen and the clockmaker’s daughter by kate morton. the last one i actually finished i don’t remember which came first but it was either monsters by emerald fennell or we have always lived in the castle by shirley jackson

Last thing you hated reading: i dont usually remember the stuff i don’t like reading, but it was probably something for school. also the same as @tony-caito ‘s answer

Favorite thing to cook/bake: brownies or bread

Favorite craft to do in your free time: play guitar or piano or write or draw or paint or

Most niche dislike: no idea what counts as a niche dislike so uhhh the feeling of paper on my teeth or cotton under my nails

Opinion on the circus: as long as no animals are being mistreated its a good fuckin time

Do you have a sense of direction: not in the slightest but if i have the maps app open wherever i am then im good lmao

hmm ill tag @mickeysjones @riotgrrrldestroyah @relyonriley no pressure no pressure

[m-feys]

for the ask, Torchwood! (what else tho akdjjfj)

aishkasjdhkjash ‘what else’ ..... youre not wrong

Favorite character: hmm this is kinda a hard one but im gonna go with Ianto

Least Favorite character: ok, for this im gonna said adam, not because he’s badly written or anything but just because he scares me so much, like he’s a really good antagonist and that makes me hate him askjdhahsd

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): janto, tosh/lois (my crack ship 💖💖💖), ummm, gwen/rhys? ig, tosh/being appreciated, and tosh/any woman. so, thats them, thats my top five kasjhdkjhad

Character I find most attractive: oooh thats hard, im gonna say it’s tosh, jack, or gwen, oh my god, also martha, there are too many ;;;;

Character I would marry: martha, ok that one was easy

Character I would be best friends with: jack, i just think he would be super fun to be friends with

a random thought: torchwood is..... so heartbreaking at times, but i really appreciate how that heartbreak (at least in the first two seasons) is portrayed as something you can still live with and deal with

An unpopular opinion: I dont really like tosh/owen as a ship, i dont think he deserved her after how he treated her. i dont hate owen or anything but i think he should work out his issues on his own and he simply doesnt desever her u_u

My Canon OTP: easy, janto

My Non-canon OTP: again, easy, tosh/lois

Most Badass Character: ok, this might seem off-base but im gonna go with tosh for this, because despite how timid she can sometimes be in social situations, she’s so cool under pressure. like in these highstakes situations she’s unshakable, if theres ever danger, tosh is absolutely the biggest badass. this title could also potientally go to ianto or gwen. but never jack. jack is just a weirdo who runs directly at everything and it just happens to work out for him (sometimes) askdjfhkshdf

Most Epic Villain: the sleepers ! i just really like that episode over all, honestly this villain would have been way cooler if that plotline hadnt been dropped off the face of the earth after s2 (i knowww its in the audios i just mean on screen)

Pairing I am not a fan of: ok, so i already said towen up on the unpopular opinion part bc i didnt read all the way down so im gonna do another pairing i dont like, gwen/jack, it’s like, i get it because theyre both hot, but i really feel like if they were in a romantic relationship they would really just bring out the worst in each other

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): honestly, jack, because i feel like they didnt acknowledge well enough the way his trauma would affect him, or had him really work through it. like, they just would like say “oh all this terrible stuff happened to jack” for the angst and never followed thru with him dealing with that stuff, idk

Favourite Friendship: ok this one is REALLY hard!! i might have to go with ianto & lois, which i know is like crack friendship but like, its so good i love writing those two

Character I most identify with: either ianto or jack (probably ianto considering my url)

Character I wish I could be: god, can none of them be an answer???? skjhkahdhj wait, i would like to be myfanwy. because then ianto would take care of me and give me dark chocolate as a treat sometimes and also i would be a pteranodon and wouldnt have to worry about human problems anymore jdhkhasdkjh

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you mrs. steak lover eater busy writer lefty eyebag 😅

They said 2 weeks, so almost Christmas time when I get them. Yeah, I used to wear contacts when I was in college and I am not used to it. I kept trying to push my glasses back up, only to realize that I am not wearing any lol nah I only have the clear ones. I found a website that used to sell contacts with various designs, I want that in the future 🤣 I can send you a picture when I get it!

I can finally send you pictures O__O!

Ah how much farther did you get with your writing? Also, you leave on the 20th? Will it be an early flight?

I hope you ate enough bread hahaha but oh no, that's definitely not good. Did you still eat it though but only enjoyed it a bit? And what is bacon jam???

I ended up working my shift. It wasn't too busy today, so at least I was kind of relaxing.

Ah I see. By the way, the link did not work. But I did google the thing, that's why I asked if it was genetic. Does the noise give you headaches? Do you hear like a ringing afterwards when the noise goes away?

Oh, does it actually sound like you? I didn't notice. Hahahaha just kidding, you caught on too fast. I was actually joking, I won't ask you to write something like that. Or would I 🤔

No it doesn't sound weird, except for the crying part with the angst lol just kidding. I get so angry with the angst stories I've read before. But not angry at the author, I get angry at myself, because why am I putting myself through this heartache lol

I'm a lesbian, but I do find some men attractive. But I don't want to be with them in any shape or form lol. Also I don't know which one I am,dom or sub.. is that even possible? Maybe I am in between? I know I am a top, but a soft top? I don't know. I barely pay attention to labels.

I see. Do you mind if I ask you how long you've been married to him?

Hm, both. Which are you attracted to, I think you said before something like femme but has a masc side? But yeah, what type are you as well.

- CuriousGeorge

Hi good morning. Sorry i fell asleep.

Aw, 2 weeks of wearing contacts? that sucks.. but hey, at least on Christmas u will have ur sight back :D that's what matters the most! :)

yaaay im excited to see ur new glasses. but i just realized i think u cant send pictures if u send anonymous ask. so i guess it's impossible for me to see the glasses. but it's okay! u can send me someday when u r ready to talk with me off anon or in direct message. no pressure. whichever u r comfortable with.

Wht shape do u always wear? and is it like thick or thin frame? mine are always either square or almost square shape glasses. mostly the frame are thick one, sometimes it's a full frame, sometimes it's just on the half top. the one that i'm always wear now is like a dark bronze or brown-ish color and full frame. i'll send u the pict of it next time. right now i'm too lazy to get up and take picture of it under a brighter light. hahahaha. i'm too comfy now in my bed. :D

wait, what did u mean u can finally send pictures? did u mean u can send pictures even when u r on anon??

how much further on my dark fic with Natasha now? hmm, right now i dont know if I would write a long part 3 or get it done in some part then start part 4 n it will be not too long part 4.

most likely, it will have 4 parts and epilogue. but i might still change my mind. hahaha. I'm just glad that I almost get it done and gets closer n closer to the end. :)

it will be an early flight, very early in the morning and since the airport is an hour away so we'll leave the night before n stay at the airport hotel so we can sleep a little longer. it will be safer anyway.

yeah i still enjoy the steak, just not as tender as i imagine it would be. what sucks is i was craving a good steak. Bacon jam, they cooked the bacon with some onion n i dont know what else but it's sweet and u can taste the caramelized onion. i dont really like onions but i eat the onions in this bacon jam. They put it on their smoked porkchop but i asked them to put it on my steak but the put it on the side.

oh okay, well i guess that's the silver lining of working from home. u can still relaxing while u r working. :D im glad u got to relax a bit. but u havent told me what happened with ur glasses? what broke it?

yes sometimes the noise give me headache n makes me feel like everything spinning n sometimes freaks me out or irritate me. i hear rings in my ear pretty often actually.

haha it does sound like me. lol dont worry, i was just kidding. like i said u can send me request if u want to or comfortable enought to do so.

i am like that too when i read angst, thats why i avoid reading angst unless it has happy ending.

ah i see, yeah i understand what u meant. I sometimes find some men attractive but lately it's just like oh wow, okay, he's a good looking man. but thats all. nothing else. :D

ah i see. okay, yeah i agree with what you meant. it's just labels, eventhough sometimes i'm curious about it on someone but at the end it doesnt really matters, what matters most is I feel comfortable with that person n they feel the same with me.

we've been married for 3.5 years now. so we've been together in total for 9.5 years.

hmm i'm attracted to any of them as long as it's not on the extreme points. I really dont like the fake plastic barbie doll type of girl thats all about look.

N yes, i like femme that still has the masculine side. N lately to be honest, i started to feel attracted to masculine girls as well. (I dont know how the best way to say this.).. the point is im attracted to all type 🤭

Which type am i? Im not sure..im in the middle i guess, not too girly but not too masculine either. I still wear dress / make up when it's needed but mostly my clothes r a little boyish but not really. I still do my hair,nails and eyebrows. I guess long time ago i research n im probably in androgynous type. Not sure.. i dpnt know the best way to answer all this. I just dont wanna sound rude to others or labeling. 😊

Well, u'll know or see it when someday u see my pictures i guess. 😊

How about u?

Next question?

Cheerio!

[juunshua]

Fashion anon again thanks for answering, I know that was a lot! It's exactly as you say, anything you owned came with a place in the hierarchy. But you only actually had to worry if you wanted to be part of the in-crowd. If not, there was judgment and derisiveness but not outright bullying. It was safer not to be cool, less pressure in the long run. (cont.)

You are right about Hao. He IS a rebel in the sense that it's easy to be laughed at if you slip with your choices, especially in Korea where they tend to play it very safe and classic. The stage is one thing, but street fashion is different especially for men. So even if he wears trendy labeled things, he is being gutsy in even choosing to stray from a certain line, he could become a fashion victim (GD anyone?) but he wears things with conviction because he has faith in his own vision.I agree about Gyuhao! What I see from Gyu is that while Hao cares more about self-expression through getting a certain look/making a style statement, he wants to be aesthetic himself, his goal is looking and feeling good, so in doubt less is more. Hao would make sure you got a stunning dress that was very you, and Gyu would prioritize you feeling stunning in the dress, so yes, they balance each other since Hao deals in the fantasy and Gyu in the concrete and practicalities.Investment pieces in fashion are typically things that are high quality, versatile, and "timeless" classics , so they will keep their value or even augment it with time. The kind of thing you pass down to your kids, or resell well if in good condition. Different brands (esp. Big-name) have different specialties. Chanel is iconic for quilted bags and tweed jackets, Burberry for Trench coats etc. Or as you said, Rolex for watches. Gyu's Hermes belt is not a BIG investment piece, but it's a start.I think my favorite style is Vernon's not because I find it pretty itself or flattering, but for how "him" it is and because I love his use of color and accessories, however jarring it may be sometimes.( Like seriously, he sometimes looks like a stoner hobo who had an accident in a paint shop😅😂) Whose style is your fave? :) (and sorry for the rant again)

response under the cut! sorry that this is super late!

hmmm...i don’t know if it was safer to be not cool...it could result in stuff that could affect you for the rest of your life. esp when you’re a kid and you don’t necessarily know that its okay to not be cool? yeah as you get older and you realize ‘oh i don’t have to do everything society tells me to,’ that can put less stress on yourself but to me, thats a different story. as a child you don’t really know that. i think judgment and derisiveness can be bullying too ahaha...but maybe im getting a bit too personal and projecting haos ‘faith in his own vision’ is really such a central aspect in his artistic life i think thats one of the things that i really respect about him, even if i dont necessarily sometimes agree with some of his artistic choices, just him going out there and pulling it off with such confidence is always super respectable to me i dont think ive paid attention to mingyus fashion choices past its general simplicity. i think its interesting that you find that his priority is making himself an aesthetic so his goal is looking and feeling good? it may not be an easy question, but what about his fashion makes you think that? but wowowow!! you put it to words! “Hao deals in the fantasy and Gyu in the concrete and practicalities.” yesyesyesyes!!! exactly that! and i even think i mentioned in my tags of some post that i always felt like if gyuhao were to design clothes, mingyu could be the fundamental layer and lay the foundations, while hao would take on the more creative expression aspect of it, which is, i think, in essence what you yourself said as well!ooh thank you for the definition!vernooonnn omgggg yes his use of colors is really something else! hes not shy at all with them either, often opting for the lighter or more neon shades of them, instead of the darker, more muted ones (though he does have his muted fashion style as well, i believe). hmm its a bit difficult for me to answer that question because i dont really pay attention to fashion all that much, but i do have some commentary on some of the members (basically recurring thoughts when i see the members im about to talk about). my current fashion is woozi, the person id prefer to dress me up if i had to dress up nicely to go somewhere would be mingyu, i realllyyyy love how clothes fit hoshis body, i love how rebellious minghao gets with his fashion, and finally seungkwan has had some amazing looks and i will never shut up about how good he looks in a simple white t shirt and jeans but i also love his overall style just in general? its hard for me to pinpoint a favorite style specifically i think but minghao might win, just because its always so refreshing to look at his outfits. i feel that because fashions do have their ‘ins’ and ‘outs, ‘ a lot of outfits end up looking similar or have similarly derived themes, at least to the untrained eye ahah, like when i go out in public i feel like i see everyone wearing the same style of clothes more or less? just variations on a theme tbh. but for hao, those themes are either used as loosely tied in inspiration or not even present in his choice of clothes. you dont know what hes going to wear ever but when he wears it, you always think ‘yup this is minghao.’ i think i find his fashion the most exciting, aesthetically pleasing, and unpredictable  

[landofsomethingsomething]

ooo how about john trying to pull a prank on roxy but she either catches him in the act or pranks him back since shes been bffsies with jane for years and nothing surprises her anymore

Roxy woke to the sound of her phone buzzing incessantly on the nightstand. Half awake and grumbling to herself, she flipped over onto her back, reached blindly out with one arm, and flopped her hand around like a dying fish until it connected with something hard and square and probably her phone. Somewhere nearby her on the bed, an indignant cat meowed a rebuke, and there was a distinct thud as the jostled animal fled. Roxy called out an apology to the affronted cat and simultaneously unlocked her phone with a quick swipe, held it up before her squinting eyes, and frowned. 

One notification, from John. A simple text containing one ominous emoji: 🎭. 

So. It was gonna be that kind of day, then. 

She didn’t bother to reply, but she did open it up so it’d mark as read on his end. Stew in that one for awhile, Egbert. She tossed her phone beside her on the bed, sat up, and stretched. Let’s do this, she thought, grinning. Another cat peered in from the bedroom door, green eyes blinking slowly. Roxy blinked slowly back. 

Phase one was easy; bedroom to bathroom. She kicked off the covers and swung her legs over the bed – and hopped lightly over the waiting tub of sopor slime plunked down on the floor, right where she’d normally be standing. No sweat. She took three steps toward the bathroom, ducked without even bothering to look, and easily cleared a roll of transparent plastic wrap fastened expertly between her vanity mirror and an old wizard clock taller than she was. Her favorite slippers (cats, of course) were discarded on the bathroom floor, kicked off before bed last night, and she bent and picked them up and carefully shook them out one by one. 

Nothing. She frowned, quirking an eyebrow. Bullshit. 

She felt around the plush soles, and – “Hah!” A telltale square chip, slid into the padding. She fished it out with a finger, shaking her head. “Got you,” she muttered, peering curiously at it. She pressed it between her fingers just to see what it would do.

The answer, apparently, was emit a pressure-trigged garbled tinny mishmash of meowing sounds through a miniscule speaker. Perfect. Laughing, she pocketed the device and continued to the toilet. Seat down. Suspicious. Behind her, a cat pranced into the room, eagerly anticipating its early morning toilet scritches. 

She went to one knee. With one hand, she gave the confused kitty the scritches it had come for, and with the other, she lifted the toilet seat, cringing back – but nothing happened. She examined every inch of the porcelain throne and found absolutely nothing, and in fact, was about to just go ahead and do her damn business already, when she thought to check the fucking toilet paper. 

Tinfoil. Not a tinfoil covered roll of toilet paper, oh no. Just a goddamn toilet paper shaped roll of tinfoil. She snorted. Went to the cabinet to pull a fresh one out. Found six more tinfoil toilet papers. Muttered a few choice oaths under her breath. 

Whatever. Who didn’t piss in the shower every once in awhile? He’d love hearing all about it, next time he was over in the morning. She pulled the tinfoil roll still up by the toilet out a bit and crinkled it, and Mr. Morning Bathroom Scritches happily took the bait, pawing at it. 

To the shower. She saw the device on the head plainly – he didn’t even try to hide it. Curious, she turned the water on just to see what would happen. 

Pink water shot out. Food dye? Probably. The little bastard had probably filled her hair shit with it, too. It was almost tempting to just use it – who had a problem with pink hair? But the truth was, she didn’t trust John’s choice of dye material. Besides, this shit was meant to turn all of her pink, obviously, not just the hair. 

– Actually, she was kind of tempted to just let that happen, too. 

Maybe later. 

She disabled the food coloring (or whatever) device and took a quick shower – and a long piss – and remembered at the last second to check the towels before yanking one off the rack. 

She lifted the edge of one, gingerly. 

It stained her fingertips pink. 

She laughed. 

The towel itself was already pink, of course, that was its natural state… all the easier to hide whatever the fuck this pink powder was all over it. And they were all like that, of course. Naturally. 

She stood in front of the mirror and resolved to air dry. It wasn’t that cold, anyway. Nothing in the hairbrush, but the blow dryer had what looked like the dessicated remains of a feather duster shoved up the barrel, so she set that down for another day. She’d make his enterprising ass pick them all out, later. Only fair. 

Back out and back under the wall of cellophane, and off to face the wardrobe. 

As it turned out, all her clothes were gone. Except her favorite dress. Which also happened to be his favorite dress. Which was a damn good dress, for like, a date. Not that it was horribly indecent – John wasn’t that kind of guy, which was usually charming – it was just, you know. Sequins. Ruffles. Showy. 

“I guess,” she said, pulling it off the hanger, “In Egbert land, prank day counts as a special occasion.” 

Another cat wound itself around her ankles, purring agreement. 

By the time she retrieved her phone, she had three more messages. Two were from John – the same emoji as before, but in greater numbers – and the third was Jane. Roxy opened that one eagerly. 

GG: Miss Roxy. GG: Might I inquire why, on this lovely spring morning, all of the clothing in my closet has been joined by what I can only describe as the most Roxy-like attire I have ever seen? TG: i would invite uTG: on this lovely spring morningTG: to ask ur fuckin son about that cause i guarantee you at this point he knows more than me GG: Oh my. GG: Prank day? TG: he was gonna turn me pink janeTG: pink from head to toeTG: pink dye pink powder and also he put a meow speaker in my meowcat slippersTG: might keep that one tbhTG: its p cuteGG: I gather from your phrasing that his dastardly efforts have been thus far unsuccessful. TG: hmmTG: actually not sure if i can trust you on thisGG: Roxy! TG: prank day is kind of an egbert AND crocker thing and u know thisGG: I cannot believe you would accuse me, your best friend, of collaborating with John to turn you pink. TG: the clothes ARE in your wardrobe apparentlyGG: And if I was in on this, why would I tell you so? TG: fuckTG: uhhhTG: idk but im sure theres a reasonTG: plots within plotsTG: wheels within wheelsTG: cats within catsTG: sec i gotta scritch a cat right fuckin nowGG: Of course. GG: Well. Since I am apparently suspect, I shall leave you to face your trials in peace. Please pick up these clothes in at least a halfway timely fashion, if you please. Closet space is an asset to be cherished, thank you very much. TG: pfft TG: u got like 15 closets all to yourself dont give me thatGG: Even so. TG: alright okayTG: if i survive this ill be by later maybeTG: maybe tomorrowTG: depends ;)GG: Not another word. GG: Tomorrow will be fine. Thank you. GG: And remember what I taught you. TG: he aint got me yetGG: Good. 

She pocketed her phone, checked her shoes five times for hidden gimmicks, found nothing, and sidestepped three buckets of glitter assembled above three separate doorways on her way out. He’d be cleaning all that up later, too, along with any cats who happened to inadvertently roll around in the glitter piles.

… After she took pictures.

The front door seemed strangely bereft of mischievous devices, and having found nothing, it was with some trepidation that she turned the knob and pushed the door open, squinting out into the daylight.

A series of loud pops and flashes nearly blinded her, as apparently an entire newsroom’s worth of photographers got to work snapping pictures. She recovered herself quickly – of course she did – and turned the arm she’d thrown up over her eyes into a dramatic wave, instead, swaying her hips as she descended the steps. The effect, she thought, was only magnified by the entourage of bounding cats spilling out around her.

“Are you serious!” John’s voice in the crowd, and then John himself, hovering up above it, arms crossed. “Not a single one?”

She waved her phone at him. “Not a one, and Janey’s already spilled the beans on where the clothes are, so you don’t even get to lord that one over me this time around.”

The cameras weren’t stopping – probably because the two of them were famous gods and the tabloids fuckin’ loved them, but whatever. She leapt up into the air and lunged after John, who made a not very sincere attempt to lunge away, only to be yanked back by Roxy’s fist bunched up in the back of his shirt. She spun him around in the air, laughing.

“What’s with all the pink, anyhow?” She elbowed him, and he caught her arm, trapping it in his. “First Jake with the blue, now you with the pink, is this kinda fetish a genetic thing I should know about?”

He wrinkled his nose – it was fucking adorable, actually – and stuck his tongue out at her. “It’s not like that,” he insisted. He was lifting her higher, high enough that the sound of the cameras was fading off into nothing. The boy did love to fly. She followed him up, smirking. “I was trying to pick something obnoxious, that you would hate, but also that you would secretly kind of like.”

“Pink kinda is my color,” she conceded.

“Exactly!”

“I liked the slippers.” She slipped the chip out of her pocket, holding it up. John laughed.

“Dirk made that just for you,” he said. “He said you’d find it, though. Guess he was right.”

She pressed the panel down and the tiny speaker erupted in heavily compressed meow-sounds, mingling with the wind. They were far, far up, now, with damp little wispy cloud trails swirling around them. “Hells of cute,” she said, waving it under his nose. He laughed and slipped an arm around her and shot up through the clouds, pulling her with him. It should have been cold up here, especially in the damn dress she was wearing, but godhood came with a number of pretty good perks.

“Tell you what,” she said, grinning, and he looked back at her curiously, eyebrows shooting up. “One day I’m gonna get you so good, you never try any of this prank day shit on me again.”

He scoffed at her. “Yeah right. That’s what they all say.”

She stopped cold in the air, and he drifted to a stop a few seconds later, looking down at her, hands on his hips. Curls of cloud stuff danced between them. Roxy grinned devlishly at him, darted forward, and –

“Hey!” John gasped, as she shot past and grabbed his legs, turning him over in the air. He reached up to grab her, missed, and she worked his shoes off with ease. “Knock it off!” He kicked at her, socked feet far too slow to actually connect, and she laughed a wild laugh and shoved him forward, somersaulting him in the air. “This is not a prank!” he insisted, righting himself and huffing at her, cheeks red. “It doesn’t count! Give me back those shoes.”

“Not a chance,” she said, sweetly, dropping them. He gasped, and predicably, he dove for them. Simultaneously, Roxy dove for him.

She caught him by the waistband as he went darting by, and momentum did the rest. He made an absolutely hilarious yelping sound, gave up on catching his shoes, and spun upward to witness her hovering above him, waving his pants in one hand like a flag.

“Roxy!” He shouted, flushing crimson. “Give those back, come on! This is not how pranking works!”

“Says you,” Roxy said, blowing him a kiss. “See you later! And remember: I love you very much.”

“Roxy, wait –”

He shot for her, but she was already gone, pants in hand, in a rush of wind and void. She laughed uproariously as the blue and white folded around her and changed abruptly to starry black.

Sucker.

[onlyjihoons]

zouk! seongwoo

a/n; honestly it was hard to decide for ong which attraction he should fit, but i figured since he likes to drink, he should prolly belong in singapore's most happening club lmao

this is part of the xmas collab wink wonk with @wannawrite and @hwinkinghwi

-this christmas, you had no other half to celebrate with, and all your friends are either out of the country or partying

-which, led you into Singapore's top club, zouk.

-your friends dragged you into this mess tbh, having had too much money to spend

-it was a free party anyway, so why not

-for once you decided to bravely wear your red and black sequined mini dress you bought last year

-but you didn't have any events important enough, or you were just feeling shy because the dress exposed more skin than you liked

-anyhow, you went to the party looking like a bombshell, even your friend was shocked

-"wow y/n! where did you get that dress??! it looks soooo good on you!!"

-you were sure she had a few to drink before you came, so you politely excused yourself to the bar which was more peaceful as compared to the other areas

-zouk was notorious for being the ideal place for horny guys to find their one night stands, so you were extra careful not to order anything alcoholic

-so you ordered a bottle of mineral water

-the bartender just shot you a quizzical look, but gave you your drink anyway

-the club had really good music though, you were very tempted to dance

-but your heels were like, 5 inches so it made movements alot more harder

-just as you were about to head to the dance floor, a group of guys stopped you, pushing you back to your seat

-"hey sweetheart," the one in blonde hair winked, his breath reeked of alcohol, "can we buy you a drink?"

-"no, i'm meeting my friends. thanks."

-"your friends can wait, " the one in lilac hair scoffed, "we're more important."

-"i, don't drink."

-"then we'll help you! we also started from square one, baby." the one with the smallest face slung his arm around your shoulder, making you uncomfortable

-"i'm cooler sober, thanks"

-credits to my bff for that quote

-"is that so? then why am i not aware of that?"

-a voice behind you spoke up, and it belonged to your high school classmate, ong seongwoo

-you weren't enemies with him, neither were you best friends. just plain, platonic, friends. period.

-however you did see him around your uni as he does attend the same uni as you, except that he took up political science while you took up business

-seongwoo looked dashing in the plain white shirt he was wearing, a dark blue stripe going down along his sleeve. evem though he didnt expose much skin as compared to the other guys in the club, he looked hot

-"i'm so sorry i'm late, baby, did you miss me?" he circled his arms around your waist, pulling you close

-at first you were startled by seongwoo's sudden affections, but you played along with the reassuring smile he sent you

-"yeah baby, i was just waiting for you." you planted a kiss on seongwoo's cheek, surpring you and seongwoo, and the three guys who tried to hit you up

-"see that? shes my girlfriend, why are you hitting on her?" seongwoo squeezed your hand, "and the three of you seem to be too young to be in a club, hmm? especially you," he pointed to the one in lilac hair, shouldnt you be studying?"

-the trio scoffed, then muttering some curse words under their breaths as they tried to find their next victim

-"hey ong, thanks for saving me back there." you smiled

-"no problem y/n, how are you? i've seen you around school but i havent got to see you like...this." his eyes scanned you up and down, making you blush

-"i--i..."

-"yah ong!" you hear someone call out to him, and as he approached, you began to recognise him.

-it was your senior, chanyeol

-"hey ong, i didnt know you had such a pretty girlfriend, and i'm surprised its y/n." he smirked

-"no, no, we're not dating, " you waved your hands nervously, "we're just..."

-"catching up yeah! we were high school classmates!" seongwoo lied through his teeth flawlessly, but chanyeol didnt seem to buy it

-"well have fun catching up," chanyeol shrugged, "i'll have to steal your boyfriend for a while, y/n, so sorry about that."

-you tilted your head in confusion, as chanyeol dragged seongwoo to the dance floor

-after a few bottles of mineral water and mindless chatter with some highschool friends you missed, you were bored and decided to hit the dance floor, finally.

-you had to admit, as much as the place was overrated and overpriced, they had pretty good music playing so you couldnt stop your moves

-until the music changed to updown funk, your eyes were pulled towards a certain human who was pulling off some sick popping moves

-you weaved through the crowd, searching for that person

-when you finally found them, you were shocked

-it was seongwoo

-all his locking and popping steps were legit, only something you would see coming out of an idol

-so you joined in, it was an unintentional collab between the both of you the crowd was cheering, even the dj was cheering

-you had a really good time dancing with seongwoo, it was as if your senior high prom was relived again

-you were dancing till 3am, which was pretty rare of your stamina to allow you to do so

-most of your friends were either wasted or already back home

-the buses already stopped their operations at this timing, leaving you no choice but to call an uber

-just as you were about to do so, a mercedes pulled up in front of you

-as the shades were drawn, you could see seongwoo's dashing face smiling at you

-"need a ride?"

-"will it be too much of a trouble for you?"

-"no its fine! i dont drink anyway"

-what a lie he didnt drink just so that he could send you home

-"..."

-"i cant leave a pretty lady out there by herself, can i?"

-seongwoo winked, and that bought you over

-you hated yourself for having been so easily succumb to seongwoo's blatant flirting, and you hated yourself even more for having fallen for an ex-classmate so quick

-so there you were, sat at the passenger's seat of seongwoo's mercedes, looking out at the window

-it was awkward, but the silence was weirdly comforting for the both of you

-"so, a mercedes, huh?" you pointed, "are you a chaebol or something?"

-"no, i'm not," seongwoo laughed, "my uncle got it for me because i won the bet of me getting into university."

-"ah i see," you nodded, "i havent got my license yet"

-"why?"

-"i just cant bring myself to drive, i dont think im ready for that too."

-"its fine, i can drive you anywhere, whenever you like."

-"so you'll be my driver for my whole life?" you giggled

-"if only you'll be my girlfriend," seongwoo blurted out

-you were stunned, and speechless because you havent seen seongwoo this straightforward before

-"if you cant return back my feelings ive had for 3 years i can forgive you--"

-"3 years?! seongwoo you couldve told me..." your voice went an octave higher, expressing your shock

-seongwoo just laughed bitterly, and he soon reached your place

-"hey y/n, i'll give you time to think--"

-you interrupted him with a kiss, and seongwoo tried to deepen the kiss but there was a knocking on the glass window, and it belonged to your older sister

-you knew you were going to be interrogated when you get back home

-seongwoo pulled away sheepishly, then placing a final peck on your cheek "see you tomorrow, princess."

-you swore if seongwoo kept up with it you would die of high blood pressure

-as soon as you closed the room door behind you when you got home, your older sister smirked, with arms folded,

-"so who was the guy you were making out with?"

[bangtanhug]

What is this talk about Taehyung being treated... differently? ... if it's true, @bighit WYD? I hope this isn't true. BigHit fam, please take care of them -no one get's left out!! And Taehyung -be YOU MAN! ARMYs will accept you no matter what. Also, can we give Taehyung the most amount of LOVE for his upcoming birthday?! Like let's tweet the hell outta it and let Taehyung know

hmmm…honestly i saw threads about it and read many - many opinions about the issue but…hmm..its not that i dont have my own opinion, its just that i have mixed feelings so i stood on the side line and analyze the unfolded scene right now. However, i will try my best to answer with cold head, without being blinded by the emotions and without skipping the details !

if im not mistaken, you’re referring to THIS twitter post which brought the issue to the spotlight. First i will react to this, if its alright with you…

1. Negative fortune: I won’t lie, I didn’t like how his fortune sounded, how his was the worst one. Tae’s facial expressiond darkened immediately after he got it, he re-read that paper for many times and even Jimin had to step in to comfort his friend ( when he said: these papers are fake)  - i hated that part, that’s the truth; because as a fan i don’t like when any of the members feel the way how tae felt at that moment.  on the other hand,we don’t know if this was made by a real fortune teller ( they are really popular in Korea and their famous ones are highly respected) or a fake one. If this was said by a REAL one, then you know…it might be true  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯? We all believe in different things, some people says some stuffs are true some says it’s just brain control … i don’t have the right to decide this, this depends on the individuals. But let’s assume Tae believes in stuff like this, this was made by a real, good, fortune teller then is it really bad if he knows what he can expect next year and be cautious about his acts? maybe with that he can protect himself? …But what if it’s just a fake, random one?-  then Tae will be the victim of this mind game and just because of this useless pressure, he will fail. I don’t know if I expressed my doubt perfectly, but I’m conflicted to say anything. If I were the staff, after receiving the boys’ fortune and seeing how there is only one bad one which might actually hurt the person, I would ask for a new one from somebody else OR I wouldn’t even hand them out to the members, instead I would look for a different topic or idea which would fill those minutes in the DVD.

2. Shaved Ice: well, this part was freaking confusing?! :O I have no idea why Taehyung was the only one who didn’t get his portion, why he had to wait or what really happened. At first, I thought they played games and he lost so this was his punishment, HOWEVER, on the dvd they didn’t show any parts like this. This eating part basically had no context o.o we just witnessed how the members feed him. A few seconds later Tae was eating watermelon alone so here is my concern about this issue. WAS Taehyung on diet at that time so he asked for a few bites? Or did Tae ordered watermelon instead of shaved ice, but he had to wait longer to get it since the staff had to look for ir or not? Tae ate deliciously, he seemed eager to get those bite from the members ( he swallowed so hard to get Jimin and Seokjin spoon too!)  so then why didn’t he get shaved ice? this shouldn’t be a mystery but this part is 100% odd. For me, it seems he was “accidentally”  left out and it wasn’t Taehyung’s choice since he was hungry and he wanted that damn food. However, we can’t judge openly here either because as I mentioned, we have no content here!!! the boys might play before and they might made an order based on rock-paper-scissord… really, I have no idea what happened here.

3. BT21 character. Until this post, I didn’t hear about this…neither read anything negative about Tata’s profile. I’m lack of knowledge in this topic and because of that I don’t want to make quick assumptions since I don’t have enough information for that. If it’s true then this move was disgusting from bt21′s part and from the company’s part too if they said their okay to that. If it’s not true then this is just another false information which tries to hype up the real issue. If anybody knows more about this, then please tell me!  

Now about how Taehyung was mistreated. I think this topic’s roots is from the pre-debut/ debut days when Taehyung was the hidden 7th member. Still today we have no idea why Taehyung was pushed aside. He couldn’t appear in the boys’ vlog - he had to sit aside, his back was only seen on those pictures which Jimin uploaded to the Internet because he couldn’t be revealed until the press conference. Because bighit never adressed the issue we can only assume things

 - this was maybe a marketing move from Bang pd. Since Tae was always handsome and very charming, the fact that he was hidden just put this mysterious aura around him and made the expectation bigger. 

- if it’s not marketing move then WHY?!?! why did he have to hide? why was he pushed aside? Tae mentioned it before that he was actually hurt and jealous because of this. He said he always watched teh boys from behind, feeling left out and sad for being alone. He watched teh other members vlog and while teh world heard about the others nobody knew him.:( I wish one day we would know the real answer for this….I just feel like this was threw under the blanket …

The alien concept….I think it was partly pushed by the company, even they called him 4D and the members too - but also it was partly pushed by the fans. For a long time Taehyung was quiet about the topic however 2 years ago ( i think it was 2 but it might be 3? i dont remember the accurate year) Tae said that he doesn’t like when people call him 4D/alien. Since he was upset about it we/fans stopped calling him in these names. But you might notice that sometimes it still appears in the DVD captions and now with this Tata character too. Now this is an interesting case, you know why? We all know how Taehyung matured and how special he is - he doesn’t use his left brain that much, instead his right brain functions moer which gaves him skills and make him a little bit “different” from the other members. it’s a good thing, this means he relies on his instincts, artistic side more - for example im sure you witnessed many genius Taehyung moments or saw them in fan videos. Tae isn’t stupid, his view of life is very interesting. While others overthink a problem, he would come up with a solution which about nobody would ever think. This part of him was “mistranslated” by bighit and by the fans in the early days. Even namjoon says cutely how Tae is a dummy who you cant hate just love, but also he is actually a genius. I’m not sure if bighit purposely still attempts this or it’s just a mistake of their behalf. 

I feel like we don’t have enough information to judge since there are many things which are hidden by bighit. We don’t know the whole story, we just see glimpses of it…. but because of that, i think some explanation would be nice. Btw the hashtag was partly ignored because of Jonghyun…it wasn’t the right time to do this and for a few other days it will be still pushed aside by fans becaue everyone is just extremely sensitive right now…. i don’t think we should sleep on this, but i think we have to find a way to hear the answers to our questions. Of course the best method would be if we could ask Tae carefully during fansigns but we don’t have the chance for that now … If anybody hear about this more or if you want to share your opinion, I’m all ears just let’s do it polietly, carefully like always

[i-amusemyself]

All 100 Questions.

Bloody hell okay thank you!!! 😄😄😄

1. Is a kiss considered cheating?Yeah, Id say so.

2. Have you ever faked orgasm?Aint never had anyone to fake it with 😂 Ngl tho its the sort of thing id do (which is terrible i know)

3. If you could have one super power, what would it be?Mind reading.

4. Do you think youre gonna be rich in 7-8-9 years?I’d be worried if I didnt have more money than I have now, but idk.

5. Tell us some funny drunk story?Oh jeez erm, I don’t really have any 😂 My friends occasionally remind me of the time at the school christmas ball one of the business teachers turned up and I quickly ran away while aggressively whispering “oh no he knows im a lesbian, aimee told him”.

6. Why are you no longer together with your ex?We work better as friends, its less stressful.

7. If you had to choose one way to die what would it be?See I’m really torn with this question. Part of me thinks itd be nice just to go in my sleep, with a heart attack or something. Its quick and painless you know.But equally I wonder if it would be better to maybe, like, have something where I knew I was gonna die. Because then I’d have time to try and do everything on my bucket list and say goodbye to everyone. Also maybe at that point I’d welcome death lmao.

8. What are your current goals?Idk? Im waiting on A level results which I really hope I’ve done well in.I hope to make lots of new friends at uni and learn how to look after myself quickly I guess. I dont know.

9. Do you like someone?I like a lot of people 😆

10. Who was the last person to disappoint you?Im really not sure??? There arent many people I expect anything from and even then my standards are pretty low. So like, I dont really get disappointed by people, only occasionally by situations.

11. Do you like your body?I could hate it a lot more, but I wouldnt say I’m happy with my body or general appearance. I struggle a lot with my features and my weight and the scars I have (which is ridiculous but thats what mental illness is)

12. Can you keep a diet?I mean if I wasnt on the diet im on rn (with lots of restrictions) id probs be in hospital 😂

13. If the whole world was listening to you right now, what would you say?Honestly id pass out under the pressure of it 😂 idk, id tell them all to take a chill pill but no one would listen.

14. Do you work?Nah, i had 3 jobs at once last yeah but now I’ve ended up with none.

15. If you could choose only one food to eat for the rest of your life what would it be?Either garlic bread or chocolate I cant decide!

16. Would you get a tattoo?I’m v much planning on getting one in the near future so yh!!

17. Something you dont mind spending all your money on?Plane tickets.

18. Can you drive?Yeah! I havent driven since I passed my test, but hopefully I havent forgotten how to that quickly!

19. When was the last time someone told you youre beautiful?…I cant remember. Thats depressing (not that I blame them).

20. What was the last thing you cried for?Argh I have no idea why I was crying, my brain just wasnt doing its job so everything made me stressed and sad.

21. Do you keep a journal?I keep a blog for diary posts but besides that nah

22. Is life fun?If you allow it to be, yeah

23. Is farting in front of people irrelevant?Tf is that supposed to mean? I guess if you know the person well it is.

24. Whats your dream car?I dont know about Dream Car, id have to research it loads to decide what my absolute fave it. Although rn I’d really love a ‘67 VW beetle bc theyre small and cheap on insurance 😂

25. Are grades in school important?My own grades are super important to me, (to the point its probably unhealthy) but in terms of how the people around me do, it doesnt really matter to me. I mean, I want everyone to do well, but I dont judge people based on it.

26. Describe your crush.She’s funny and all around awesome and interesting and good at deep convos and beautiful and way out of my league.

27. What was the last book/movie that really impressed you?The last one I read called The Bell Jar. It was unlike anything I’ve ever read and made me think about a lot of things. Also I related a lot with the main character.

28. What was your last lie?Eh, probably “im fine”.

29. Dumbest lie you ever told?Idk?? I only keep track of the good lies 😉

30. Is crying in front of people embarrasing?It shouldnt be but yeah, I try my best not to.

31. Something you did and are proud of?Umm, idk im p proud of playing basketball and representing my region/training with england. But i quit that so 👏 dicks out for my regrettable decisions 👏

32. Whats your favourite cocktail?Never had one

33. Something you are good at?Annoying people and being clingy 😂 also maths ig

34. Do you like small kids?It depends on the child, the day of the week, the lunar cycle, my menstrual cycle, how hungry I am…Yh legit sometimes I hate them sometimes I love them.

35. How are you feeling right now?Great omg I just got my best friend to watch mamma mia and now shes high on life next to me.

36. What would you name your daughter/son?🤐 there are a couple of names for girls I like and like 2 boys names? But i dont wanna say bc theyre embarrasing.

37. What do you need to be happy?Good company, good food and possibly music.

38. Is there someone you want to punch in the face right now?Theres always at least 3 people I would love to punch 😂

39. What was the last gift you recieved?My best friend got me a necklace and I almost cried its so beautiful

40. What was the last gift you gave?The gift of my company @only-slightly-dangerous 😉😉😉

41. What was the last concert you went to?I went to to see Amber Run in february

42. Favourite place to shop at?Um, as in shop? A place called blue banana probs (england’s hot topic smh)

43. Who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander bc they helped me to understand who I am and how I feel and to be loud and proud about it.And Luke Cutforth bc he’s so open about his mental health and struggles with self harm but hes so happy now.

44. How old were you when you first got drunk?18 lmao

45. How old were you when you first got high?It aint happened yet (and i dont really want it to)

46. How old were you when you first had sex?It aint happened yet smh

47. When was your first kiss?As far as im concerned never

48. Something you want to do until the end this year?What….does this mean….? Idk???

49. Is there something in the past you wish you hadnt done?It’s more stuff I wish I had done tbh. I suppose I said things I shouldnt have or got too involved in drama, but you kinda need all that secondary school shit to learn from it

50. Post a selfie.Lmao nah fam

51. Who are you most comfortable around?My best friend by a mile. Privacy who?

52. Name one thing that terrifies you.Abandonment without explanation.

53. What kind of books do you read?Anything non fiction about medicine/being a doctor/disease/psycopaths.Besides that whatever has been recommended.

54. What would you tell your 12 y/o self?1. Youre gay2. You and I both know you arent joking about being “a dude trapped in a girls body” stop laughing it off and confront it.3. Stand up for yourself.4. Chill out.5. Laugh a lot more omg

55. What is your favourite flower?It’s between petunias and roses

56. Any bad habits you have?Not answering peoples messages unless theyre Certain Person A or Certain Person B.

57. What kind of people are you attracted to?Ones that are out of my league and could kick my ass apparently. Also ones that are kind, listen and think a lot I guess

58. What was the last thing you cried for?Already answered

59. Is there something you dont eat? A food that truly disgusts you?I dont eat loads of stuff bc my guts hate me 😂 but besides all that I’m actually the worlds least picky eater. The only thing I dont like is raw tomato. Thats it.

60. Are you in love?I wish

61. Something you find romantic?All the clichés ngl 😂 just anything that says “i love you” or “i was thinking about you” really

62. How long was your longest relationship?Like 4 months? Barely long term.

63. What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex?Oh jeez i hate these theyre so stereotype-y1. Bitching2. Not supporting each other3. ….?

64. What are 3 things that irritate you about the opposite sex?1. Not supporting each other2. Massive egos3. Yelling

65. What are you saving money for?Uni so I dont starve to death!

66. How would you describe your bad side?Hmm, idk, it depends what someone did to get on my bad side. I’d say stubborn, bitter and angry tho usually.

67. Are you actually a good person? Why?I could be wrong but I think so long as someone has morally good intentions they are usually a good person, whether they always succeed or not. So yeah, I like to think I am.

68. What are you living for?My friends and the hope I have for my future.

69. Have you ever done anything illegal?Piracy? Thats it.

70. Do you like your money?….did I type this question wrong or??

71. Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally?Okay, the honest answer? Yeah. When I was a lot younger and less mature and someone said something that hurt me, I tried to retaliate with equally hurtful comments. I like to think I wouldnt do that now.

72. Ever sent nudes?Lol no

73. Have you ever cheated on someone?Hell no

74. Favourite candy?All candy hates me 😂

75. Is there a blog you visit everyday or almost every day? Tag them.Yeah @oneshappyplace knows I regularly spam her with notes in search or Quality Memes (im so sorry)

76. Do you play any computer games? Whats ur fave?Nah, as if I have time 😂

77. Favourite TV series?Argh I canny choose? I love the IT Crowd, I love supernatural, I love Sherlock, I love in the flesh…

78. Are you religious? Does God exist?I’m not religious and personally I don’t believe there’s a god or higher power but I could be wrong.

79. What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why?The Bell Jar. See 27.

80. What do you think about vegetarians and veganism?I respect it I guess? At one point I was p much a vegetarian until I had to restrict my diet sooo. Tho I could never be one now, let alone a vegan.

81. How long have you been on tumblr?Too long 😂😂😂 Like 3 or 4 years?

82. Do you like chinese food?Love it!

83. McDonalds or Subway?(Never been to subway so) McDonalds.

84. Vodka or Whisky?(Never had whisky so) Vodka.

85. Alcohol or Drugs?(Never had drugs so) Alcohol.

86. Ever been out of your country?I’m currently in the USA so yeah 😂

87. Meaning behind your blog name?It’s p self explanatory and also v true

88. What are you scared of?Abandonment, deep water, knives, toys with battery packs.

89. Last time you were insulted?Ugh, probs like when I met up with a load of school friends for our leaver’s ball.

90. Most traumatic experience?I’d rather not answer that lmao (plus itd take a long time to type)

91. Perfect date idea?Chilling and listening to each other’s favourite songs while coexisting and eating fast food 😂 that or ikea ngl

92. Favourite app on your phone?Tumblr. Even though I hate it, it also keeps me sane.

93. What colour are the walls in your room?White and blue.

94. Do you watch youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber?I love so many youtubers omg. Lukeisnotsexy, mileschronicles, realisticallysaying and filthy frank are faves

95. Share your favourite quote.Pick your fights.

96. What is the meaning of life?To live life to the fullest so youre happy and have minimal regrets. Also to be kind and helpful so even if you dont change the world you might help someone else to.

97. Do you like horror movies?I think….? But I’m not good at watching them alone 😂

98. Have you ever made your mum cry? What happened?Eh…again, would rather not answer (we got some nice supressed memories here)

99. Do you feel lucky or special in any way?I’m still totally in awe of how lucky I am to have met my best friend from 3000 miles away. Like, the probability of it was so so slim and yet here we are.

100. Can you keep a secret?I think so yh! It’s something that I consider super important.

[inthewordsofahalfgoddes]

Free Writing

I feel sick. On friday i came home dizzy feeling like I was dead walking and passed out sleeping for most of the night into the day. I woke up sunday feeling a lot better but as i tried to eat my body was not having it. Even now I can’t stomach too much but apples and even then that is pushing it. i feel like at any second i will puke but It’s a faint sensation. I had two dreams that had me startled and put a slight cloud on my day until i forced the thoughts away. The first was strange and happened about 2 days ago. i was in an apartment listening to a friend of mine talk about his life. I was trying my best to fight trying to have sex with him and failing. even going so far as to entering the bathroom with him. ugh. i was pretty upset at myself in my dream cause I watched myself do it but in my head I was like ‘why are you doing this. don’t do it’. so anyway I have a pair of headphones on connected to like a walkkie talkie and I hear my ex’s voice on the other end. he’s talking about old money business and i click the talk end and ask him to repeat it. He is shocked and he says ‘your voice is too much right now’ and I apologize and ask him to repeat it. he starts to cry and i can hear the emotion and I look up feeling his pain. It was strange because I didn’t really care too much about the situation. I feel like I already moved on from him a long time ago and I didn’t regret my decision at all but haring the pain and emotion in his voice was too much. the dream ends and its a shallow dream so i know im near to akinng up. I carried that with me for the majority of the morning and it bothered me because i feel like i am being punnihsed for how the relationship went. I dragged it on for longer then it needed to be. wayyy longer and I still look back now and regret it but I’m learning to move past it and not dwell too much on it. I eventually was brave enough to face being alone and potentially being unloved so there is that. The other dream happened today. jesus had a weir dtanget and left a silly conversation we were having. i think he really just wanted to step away from me and i was actually pretty okay with it. I feel when we talk too much it puts a strain on our friendship. i wanna-say relationship but...I don’t like that. Inn my head im much more happy seeing it as a friendship because that means its safe. i almost don’t give myself any reason to be jealous  about others and i can give him my love in friendship and that is much more better for me. but some things he said got to me. He was talking about how dull and boring my life would be without him and at first i just joked about it but now I’m startting to see his point. Would i have been exposed to music without him? not as intense bth.My obsession with music and desire to persue it in some shape or form was inspiredby him and who he pointed out to me. I covet his songs so much. They are like staples for me and i dunno im actually listening to one of his songs now (let ‘em know by bryson tiller). So now that he has done his typical thing pretending to be upset and leaving “for couple of days” I have time to think. Its also venus retrograde whihc is like time to revisit and reassess how I see love, how i want to be loved and how I love others. also how my relationships look like and if there is a need for change. This is a simplistic view but its my understanding of it. So I know his venus is in Leo. which lmao is very fitting. hmm sometimes i wonder if I need to slow down with my thoughts of him. I am fascinated by him, pused by him, fired up by him, irritated, annoyed, and some feelings that i cant or wont name. So where does that leave me? Sometimes in my head i’ll call him allan and that makes me pause. Am i waiting for a saviour again? if i am i need to step back and realize that that only ends in pain and dissapointed hope. My last relationship i leanre da lot but it was under duress. it was painful and like forced me out of my caccoon under his hand and i felt so constrained as i tried to heal. it was too much for me and he never did understand me. Now that i’m just feeling jesus out I now see i see him as a saviour and i’m torn bewteen seeing him as one and being okay with it. is it so bad to have friends as liferafts? but at the smame time i dont think he should be treated like one :/ idk its weird though things have been feeling so surreal to me. watching my hands type and literally giving form to my words is unsettling to me. I feel like something is happening to me and i’m scared that its something bad. i don’t rmember being so sick before. in 3 years i only ever experieneced slight sniffles and here i am full blown sick and shit. i’m worried for myself and my body.I ask for michael’s healing and proetction. I am in a strange place and I wonder what will become of all of this. I feel so out of place. maybe its the books i have been reading too. When i read i somtimes carry bits of it into my life. i wake up in this world slightly disjointed and off. I finished reading parable of the talents and that left me shook. i have oto write a book review for that but ive been avoiding it for some reason? anyway I’m a lil way halfway trough lilith’s brood and I find the book fascinating and also scary in a way. i’m not scraed perse about the alients. or maybe i am idk. I’m more scared of the future where women and children will be vulnerable. why is it that males resourt to being bullies again once oscieties are gone? why sare they the most dnagerous? i mean even now they still are and its wrapped up in laws, decorms etc but in a dystopian futuere? terrifying. I couldnt be like Olomina and dress like a man because I am too fullfigured and womenly to pass. i am worried for myself. I just want to be free....i dunno what is going on with me? I ffeel like im drifting in and out of reality and things feel dreamy. I had a thought about my empathy and pisces power and like...maybe all my empathy is for books? thats when i feel so misty and out of it after reading ike my mind really led me away. im happy im reading again at least. it unsettles me that i am becoming  a women. I am entranced with myself seeing the curves, my skin and body seeing how beautiful it is but also seeing how dangerous it is to me and my life. How many times will people punish me for how i look? men mostly. and i dont mind suing what power i apparently have over them but its like i know it will be used aaginst me soon. i never feel wrong for knowing that my body is beautiful. I know it is and i know i am beautiful and a creature many may want to touch and have. I am growing into it and i feel like a flower that is maturing before peoples eyes and im afraid. i know fear is bad so let me say mor elike it unsetles me. but with chnage comes growth and i feel like because of my freeizing myself as i unthaw and turn into who i was supposed to be i am going to blossom very quick. its also weird too because as I say i want this this and this in my body over time i gain that. i was so e skinny and i wished to be thicker and now here i am getting thicker and i know if i atemore id be even thikcer and yet my stomach has not changedd and actually has remained smaller then it as before? i am also finally looking pretty. i felt like such an ugly child and now i wonder if its not that im being graced with it now but that i am seeing it in myself. i know i have eyes that can trap people. I actually look away to make them feel comfortable because if i stare too long at eople they either get caught up in my face (men especially) or they paue for a second.. idk. i feel like im changing t into something that ahs power that i am not comfortble handling;. or am i just being dramatic? the voice in my head is soft and quiet and that is the true me. I have to protect her because thhis world wants to hurt her and she is too good for it. that sounds weird.. But i know i have to keep this shell around me because peope see weakness and want to go for it/. when i gaine dback my sag and leo self i have used it like a shield against people and emotions. only a few know about my soter side/. jesus nampende and allan do. allan has used it and used it agains me to quiet myself, jesus looks down on it and i think nampende is the only one who sees it and sympathzes with it. alone i am soft and always ondering. when im with peoplei am dynamic lughing being wild and having fun. i know that that needs to be my face to protect me. these days i feel like i need to make a descion.  I dont know when and what i need to decide on but i know something will happen soon in my life. something big. idk.maybe its the new moon in virgo? or maybe its just me. im usually okay with momnets of confusion but coupled with this sickness and weird feeling im worried. i had my period so im worired im pregnant but....idk.anywasy on a more shallower side im getting my hair done and im trying to get a new phone. i know its mostyly because i wanna just fuck show people i actually am cute asf? for some reason i cna never capture how beauiful i am in pictures. maybe its the dymanicness of my face. idk i mosty want jesus to se it i think he thinks im ugy af and im like not??? if he saw me in person i dont think he would be saying and talking to me the ay he does. but i cant help things and tb its better that way. if i eve rsee him it will be a good suprise for me when i smirk at him like boyyyy you don fucked up;. anywyas im being etty and yes my exercises ha and will be fueled with this drema in mind veen tho i know it may not actually happen nor go the way i want ti to go. ughh sometimes i forget that im 23 and dont need to have it ll figured out. like thast not un expuse but i always be putting so much pressure on myself to know so much and catch up because i froze so much of myself. i know my body ma=eant well with how it chose to protect me but sis, i suffer lol.I am trying my best to just do my best. I feel tested and tested constantly but i guess with trying to be a better person and working on yourself. oh wait. PLUTO. i remmeber asking pluto a month ago to reveal all my bad shit a lotttt over the course of a month and sicne its a slow moving planet its prob now just hitting me. yikes. well if i cna make it through this then i really will be rdy for anything. so much pressure and stimulation i know i can survive but damn i need a break and shit.well i have tomorrow off so im probgonna chill and dhit. i have a meeting with some witches and other femmes in about an hour so lmao idk man im just trying my best. I hoope the universe sees that im trying because awd jesus i am. I love myself through this no matter what. the feeling that im gonna die is creeping up again its so strange i hvent felt this oh...its probably just anxiety over this sickess. ugdwheteriutuieyte45465hthrethuwt im gonna stop lol this has been too long already (peep the change in tone thast my sag self shining through)