#hm........... my heart............
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"mithrun is the only real monsterfucker in dungeon meshi" is objectively the funniest bit you can get out of his everything, but in all seriousness i think his attraction to his love interest is deliberately overstated—and that makes sense, because romantic jealousy is a classic and digestible motive, which is explicitly what kabru was aiming for in condensing mithrun's backstory, and also because until chapter 94, mithrun wasn't willing to admit to the true nature of his desires.
but because romantic envy is both classic and digestible, it probably isn’t a unique enough or complicated enough desire to tempt a demon’s appetite. mithrun’s wish, as far as we can figure from kabru’s reduced retelling, was to have a life in which he had never become one of the canaries, and that carries like 3857 implications and desires within it. that’s delicious. his love interest acts as sort of a red herring to his motivation for making it, though. (side note: i'm saying "love interest" here because, keeping in mind that i barely speak japanese on a good day anymore, "想い人" is something i'd usually take as just kind of an old-fashioned and romantic way to refer to a lover, but in context i wonder if both the connotation of yearning and the vagueness are intentional, and i think this phrasing gets those aspects of it more effectively. anyway.)
mithrun considered his love interest to be untrustworthy. there was a minute where i thought that comment might be about a similar-looking elf (yugin, one of his squad members), but comparing the two…
the "sketchy" arrow is definitely referring to the elf we know as his love interest—the bangs go toward her right, she only has the one forehead ornament, and, most notably, her ears aren't notched.
every time she’s given a full-body depiction in his dungeon, she’s drawn as a chimera, with the body of a snake from the waist down. (side note: the “what if a dungeon has chimeras before reaching level 4?”/“then the dungeon lord is unstable” exchange just being mithrun grilling his past self alive is so funny. he’s so. but anyway) there are a couple things about this.
first, the snake part of the chimera appears to be modeled after some species of coral snake mimic
which, in the biology-for-fun manga, i… doubt is a coincidence, especially with the added context of the “untrustworthy” comment. the dungeon’s conjured illusion of mithrun’s love interest was a harmless copycat of a venomous original. for whatever reason, he felt this person was a threat and made up a "safe" version of her to be in a relationship with, and while it’s definitely possible to be attracted to or even love someone you find to be toxic and/or intimidating, when you take that into consideration alongside the configuration of her body, you get some interesting implications.
which brings us to our second point: if we assume that mithrun was not in fact fucking a snake, then sexual attraction, at least, was so far removed from his idea of a relationship with this person that he did not even bother to keep her dungeon copy human enough to maintain the illusion of the option of a sexual relationship. this is somewhat echoed in the depictions of their interactions, which also imply a frankly unexpected romantic distance. she kisses his cheek and he doesn't seem to react; she's at the edge of a narrow bed with only one set of pillows, on top of his blankets while he's underneath them.
the kiss is particularly interesting because it seems to contrast the text. kabru's narration tells us this was everything mithrun could have asked for, but mithrun is there looking unreadable to pensive, likely because this is right before the panel that makes it clear things in the dungeon are beginning to go wrong.
walking through this backwards for a minute, we have the physical barrier of his bedding and the spatial separation inherent in a bed made for one person, the emotional barrier of his mounting anxiety getting in the way of his ability to enjoy the affection he sought, and... the snake, which historically carries the connotation of temptation, yes, but also mistrust, barring physical intimacy. okay. ok. if a dungeon reflects the mentality of its lord, all of this might suggest that mithrun was not able to have any real desire for a relationship with this person. his unwillingness to be vulnerable or let another person in was insurmountable. but in that case, why was she such a focal point that she remained to the end, after his dungeon had stopped creating iterations of his friends to come and visit him? why would he get so upset over her meeting with his brother that he became lord of a dungeon about it?
well. mithrun's brother was also interested in her, probably genuinely. and mithrun had to win.
you have an older brother who your parents completely ignore, probably in part because he is chronically ill/disabled and almost definitely in part because he received a ton of recessive traits that resulted in rumors that he was an illegitimate child. you are aware, most likely because those same parents fucking told you, that you actually are an illegitimate child. but they keep you around because you had the good fortune of looking just like your mother. what can that possibly teach you but that you, like your brother, are disposable?
it's utterly unsurprising that mithrun, under these circumstances, developed a pathological need to be better than everyone around him. people don't keep you otherwise. i'd argue this is also why he says he looked down on everyone he knew while milsiril claims his dungeon reeked of feelings of inferiority—he sought out people's worst traits and prioritized them in his mind to protect his already extremely fragile sense of self-worth, and all the while he tried to be as likable and high-performing as he possibly could be. his parents disposed of him anyway, but even then he tried to keep up the performance. he was kind to everyone. he never once lost to a dungeon.
when he saw his "love interest" meeting up with his brother, what he saw was himself being replaced by a person his parents had always treated as worthless, and if that was what they thought of the child they'd kept, what value could anyone possibly see in the bastard they'd given away to die? mithrun and kabru tell the story like he wanted to win this unnamed elf's heart, but it was never about being with her. it was about cementing his worth, proving that he didn't deserve to be thrown away.
and so it's particularly cruel that his demon discarded him, too. but maybe it's also particularly gentle that, in the end, there was someone who refused to even consider giving up on him.
kui laid it out in three panels better than i could hope to.
yeah. it's love. you wanted to be loved, even when the only way you were able to understand it was through the desire to be wanted, and you wanted that so badly that the idea of being consumed felt like the promise of finally mattering to someone.
#dungeon meshi spoilers#mithrun#dungeon meshi#this has been rotating for a while but i wanted to check my evidence before getting into it thanks user angelspenance for posting that meme#half of this is just the text and the other half i'm sure has been said before but it's making my brain [radio static] so here this is#someone did for sure mention this but i do find it very cute that in his fucked up conjured world meant to portray his ideal reality#his teammates came to visit him. like part of the fantasy was then explicitly that they cared about him and were his friends. even though#he says he tried to see the worst in them.#hm it does feel important to note that i do also believe 100% in mithrun suicidality--his desire to be eaten does seem to focus a lot on#wanting it to be Over. wanting not to be left incomplete and empty anymore.#but that loops back around a bit to the hole in your heart that appears when you feel unloved. it's many things and the same thing at once#snakes#long post#severe problems#meshy
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HI TUMBLR i'm completely new to this. enjoy my rambling HELLO TO THE CHONNY JASH HMS PEOPLEESPECIALLY . ! Expect more of this if I ever remember to post :] I've literally only been at this for ... 2 months.......?? 2 months into the fandom? And only like. a month of properly being fully invested. And I've already worked out my own designs ........ [Mostly.!] First up we have Heart !! First character I looked at designing due to being assigned them by my friend group [hi gang :) !!] This LITTLE - Anyway I have good emotions toward him and enjoy him so much...... /pos Feel free to ask me anything abt the design, notes or concepts behind it! I will ramble your ear off. Be prepared... ALL OF THIS IS ENTIRELY HEADCANNON OKAY !! dont kill me /silly
#hms#cj hms#chonny jash#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cccc heart#0ne-eyed-ghost redesigns#heart chonny jash#chonny heart#heart cj#cccc#art#artwork#HES MY FAVORITE ? HONESTLY? SORRYY :Pray:#i literally cant get enough of bullying him or rp'ing in character#how does one even tag#wtvr im doing it#0ne-eyed-ghost#headcanon#headcannon design
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your movie charles art gives me cuteness aggression
obsessed with getting these asks back to back and yet they both hold some truth i think ...... thank you very much everyone ....
#semi-nsft ?? ig ??#xmen#xmen movies#xmen dofp#xmen first class#charles xavier#professor x#snap sketches#fr thank you - both of you :] !!!!! i do my best to make any and all iterations of charles xavier look lovable#not hard. for me anyway. i have this condition called Perpetual Heart Eyes and it worsens when i see/think of a chara i like#tho im mildly appalled by how much love my movie charles doodles get considering i only really draw him. when you guys mention him vjLAEAEJ#'appalled' is a weird word. Pleasantly Surprised is better i think#BUT AGAIN I DONT MEAN TO thats just how it happens. ig thats also why im happy to hear it. or read it LOL#LIKE I /HAVE/ DRAWN HIM ON MY OWN OF /COURSE/ just. def doesnt feel like that much ... hm ...#tho tbh maybe i do draw mostly in response to asks .... im not getting the hard data on that we're moving on it aint that serious#ANYWAYS. more movie charles to come. hopefully. idk if SOON but hopefully i still have some stuff i wanna draw with him#on that note @ second anon topping him wouldnt fix him or make things better really but itd be fun to watch probably
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I feel like people don't often fully appreciate how hard dating can be for demisexuals.
It just hit me the other day when I found out that most people are kissing by the first date and having sex by the third and to me that is just wild. And apparently, some people wait up to three months before having sex and that's seen as like a really long time and I'm sorry but is everyone okay???
After three dates a person is still a stranger and after three months they're at most an acquaintance - and people are not willing to wait longer and you'll be seen as unreasonable if you want to wait for a year or more??
#I'm asexual and am not in the business of wanting sex with anyone#but sometimes I find myself wondering if I could and in what situation#and I'm like hm maybe if I knew someone for like 5 years and loved them a lot as a friend and trusted them maybe I could compromise#and then I found out about expectations in dating culture and my mind was blown#it makes me realise how asexual I am lol#but I feel like most people are using dating apps now and it's pretty hard to have a really slow getting to know someone#so my heart goes out to demisexual people because I think a lot of people see them as not having many obstacles#demisexual#asexual spectrum#asexual community#ace spectrum#acespec#asexuality#asexual
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Sources: Wikipedia (Angel), Wikipedia (Robot), Wikipedia (Sacredness - Holy), Wikipedia (Guardian Angel), Wikipedia (Duty), Wikipedia (Seraph), Wikipedia (Transcendence - Religion), Wikipedia (Divinity)
#my webs#web weaving#webweaving#got this idea while writing about angels earlier and went oh!! okay let's do that#and then when choosing a format i was like hm a webweave is good but what if we started branching out yk? so we have this now#does it make sense? i hope it does lmao all the arranging and rearranging takes forever nobody tells you that#i heart parallels baby!!!#angelposting
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obsessed w them <3<3<3
#my art#ninjago#i know in my heart kai wasnt a biter but look me in the eye and tell me he couldn´t´ve been? hm?#anyways cranked this out in one sitting so it´s probably real messy lmao#the kai and wyldfire dynamic is everything to me <3<3<3<3#fanart#dr2 spoilers#ninjago spoilers#ninjago dragons rising#kai smith#wyldfyre#wyldfire#how is her name spelled even????#kai jiang
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woe be upon ye... tech gear roxas
#kingdom hearts#roxas#i found the left one in my old doodles and was like. hm. i bet i could make it sexier#zilly art
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i think i need a lobotomy
#weee single hued barn because i Couldnt Be Fucked!#also i Do love single hue things. it always looks tasty <3#and its a fun little exercise in values! or something! am i making excuses! maybe!#anyway im back on my Putting Guys In Outfits bullshit#theres not enough barnaby art....#theres not enough Handsome barnaby art....#scribble garnish#welcome home puppet show#welcome home#barnaby b beagle#hes my everythinggggggg#cant wait to see him get Fucked Up 🕺 Fucked Up 💃 Fucked Up 🍻#every day i wake up and look at the teeny tiny barnaby in the teeny tiny heart shaped locket In My Mind#Also. an aside. a Thought i had while doodling.#a Genuine Curiosity musing.#i wonder what kinda drinks the neighbors would favor...#what would they order at a bar if they could go to one...#im soooo fucking curious guys im. I WANNA KNOW#what drink should i have put in barn's hand. hm. This Question Will Forever Haunt The Depths Of My Skull
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(YOU CAN'T LET THEM GO HOME.)
#i have no good caption for this#ignore the mistakes i dont have the motivation to fix them#sighhh#i watched another playthrough today and i am just.#haha as it turns out the story doesnt get any less relatable and heart breaking the second time thru!!!!!#hhhg#i love sif#...#ugh#anyway#isat#isat siffrin#isat spoilers#in stars and time#in stars and time spoilers#isat act 5 spoilers#i will always draw sif like a creature btw#hes always kibty to me#the little beast#the monster under his own bed#hm#my art#i missed that one#... i like this one a lot#i like SIF a lot#this game broke me#trying to make a caption#ok yep yeah no that ones good<333#guh#i get it man i get it
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yeah i’m into chonny jash now . idk what happened to me but i will not be escaping anytime in the near future . Exciting Day
#peachphernaliart#only the First pass of a soul design i will probably change it#hes my favorite :-]#cccc#cccc heart#cccc mind#cccc soul#chonny jash#chonnys charming chaos compendium#hms#cj heart#cj mind#cj soul#eyestrain#cw eyestrain
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never got around to finishing this one. Original and ID below cut
[ID 1: A drawing of Heart, Mind, and Soul on a ski lift. Heart and Mind are sitting on either side of Soul, and Heart is reaching over Soul to grab at Mind. They are yelling at each other. Soul is leaned back in the middle seat holding a lit cigarette as it says, “I hope this ski lift breaks and we die.” End ID.] [ID 2: The original image that the joke comes from. It’s a screenshot from roblox; three players are riding on a ski lift. The middle one is saying, “I hope this ski lift breaks and we die.” “Lift” is misspelled to be “life.” End ID.]
#my art#cccc#cj soul#cj heart#cj mind#cj hms#cccc fanart#Proportions are off LMAO don’t look too closely#smoking#cw smoking#cw cigarettes#chonnys charming chaos compendium
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reposts my chonny jash art cutely 💜💜
#originally posted on my pinterest acc btw#chonny jash#chonny jash soul#chonny jash mind#chonny jash heart#cj hms#cccc hms#hms#heart mind and soul#chonnys charming chaos compendium#my art
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The Death of Jashius Chaesar
Happy Ides of March!
Featuring (left to right): @artofdansan, Whole, WWPH, Chonny, Mind, Kairos/the before., Heart, THDPH, Soul. As well as The Narrator/Mathias, and 20XX in the back
#Chonny Jash#chonny jash fanart#cccc hms#cj hms#cj whole#cj mind#cj heart#cj soul#chonny’s charming chaos compendium#cj tb.#cj the before#cj kairos#will wood power hour#cj wwph#that handsome devil power hour#cj thdph#cj charis#gwtnlh#cj gw#cj mathias#cj narrator#cj 20xx#ides of march#itsnotjustgibberish#art#the anarchy anthology#cringle jimble from my songs#might color this eventually#also drawing over old paintings is so fun I should do this more
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oh to trust another troll w a sharp object against yr head
#homestuck#solkat#sollux captor#karkat vantas#2023#vioart#cut my hair recently..#told the barber to hv fun w it and he gave me the thin mullet of a jrock idol#anw i think its. hm.#combing thru old content i do notice for every year since hs ended theres at least 5 ppl going like. “man... solkat huh”#and despite it being 5. its crazy how the weight of that sentiment can echo across hundreds of ppl going yeah in their minds#how.... to explain to non-slkts just how inconsolable we are#dvkt can fill the heart and ersl can tickle the funny but . yk. solkat is silly chaotic dramatic and sincere everything-in-one#ultimately i do think dvkt endgame was the right move but. well. slkt is imprinted in my dna as the otp ever....#do u know how CRAZY it makes me that slkt both ended up w time players!!! i have a future post planned on this HRAGH.#maybe feb/march 2024 hm. its a rather 👁️ one that i still need time to marinate on
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hellaur. I felt like drawing a musical timeline of my goofy little heart interp :) so here he is! ^_^ I’m so very normal about him
Oh yea, cute little fun fact about him, those purple hearts on his wings are actually colourful feathers :) so when he’s angry and they’re puffed up, they split in half like little broken hearts
#cccc#chonny jash#heart cj#heart chonny jash#art#my art#hms#chonny’s charming chaos compendium#plooper#look at him ain’t he cute#he’s okay I promise#he’s chillin#oh yea important note he was NOT intentionally blinded#I just don’t fw that sorry. it was a freak accident here#absolutely diabolical transition though#my favourite little disaster#fucked up and evil
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midnight crew based / inspired kids or something
i have been spinning them around in my head like a microwave for 3 days now and they make me so happy
their names are jack ( original i know ), coby , dean , and hyde respectively methinks
EDIT : IF U SEE THIS DONT REBLOG THIS ONE REBLOG THE RESPRITES FROM MY ALT THEYRE WAY BETTER !!!! WAY WAY BETTER ! https://www.tumblr.com/apochryphalantithesis/740274504979382272/i-love-editing-their-outfits-theyre-like-little
#aquared homestuck au where the midnight crew are the kids and there are some other guys too i think#homestuck#homestuck fankid#?? i guess#the midnight crew#spades slick#clubs deuce#diamonds droog#hearts boxcars#shit what else do i tag this with#hm#sinks away into my little hidey hole#also id appreciate feedback on the names
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