#his voice is so soft and gentle and UUUGH

[nekrosmos]

"Please Sergeant Garrick, don't be shy, take what you like."

Nikolai in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare | 11/?

[paperclip-skz]

Always Knew

fem*Reader x Minho

*WARNING*

contains p n v, sex, unprotected sex, kissing, oral ( men receiving), tension, fluff; I'm sure I missed something; let me know in the comments.

WC: 2.3k

*****

You stumble past the door, flinging your shoes off to the side and slinging your coat onto the rack. 

Your body deflates like a balloon the second you walk into your shared apartment. “How’d it go?” Minho calls from the couch, watching some new random drama. You walk to the living room, where he is comfortably sitting in his perfect plain grey shirt and his perfect black sweat. Why does he have to be so goddamn perfect? You grumble internally. 

He tears his eyes away from the screen and looks at you, where his face lights up like a Christmas tree. “Bad date?” he smirks. 

“Oh, wipe that stupid smirk off,” you crumble, falling down onto the couch in a huff. You reach for some popcorn from the bowl resting on the coffee table. You stuff your face with a handful of popcorn and glue your eyes to the TV screen. 

“What was so bad about this one?” Minho side-eyes you.

You roll your eyes at the memory of your failed date, “what wasn’t bad about him?! He didn’t pay! He forgot my name twice!” You twist your body completely to him, trying to get your aggravating point across. “he kept talking about his job like nonstop. He didn’t want to have a conversation; he just wanted to talk! AND he chewed with his mouth open….ALL NIGHT!”

You slam your body to the couch, making it all dramatic like the world is ending, and for you, it just might. This is number 7 down the drain, and it all just seems hopeless, especially because the one you really want is laughing right beside you. 

“It sounds like you just got unlucky…again,” he smirks.

“Uuugh,” you say, grab the nearest pillow, set it right between you and Minho, and slam your head against it. Minho chuckles at your overdramatic self and starts petting the crazy strands of hair that stick out. 

What you don’t know is that Minho is secretly throwing a party in his head. He dreads the day you come home from another one of those cheap dates and you're actually happy. So when he says his next words, they are through gritted teeth.“Come on, kitty, there's always next time,” he coos sarcastically. 

You lift your head, your frown still visible. Oh, what Minho would give to tug on that pouted lip and make you whimper. “Yeah, I guess you're right.” Minho is knocked out of his thoughts by you, shuffling into a position on the couch and getting your phone into your hand. 

You begin the tedious journey of going back to swiping left or right, looking at profiles and bios to see if anyone strikes your interest. 

Minho tries his hardest to pay attention back to the drama he is watching, but he can’t help but look over your shoulder. Who are you looking for? What are you looking for? Surely, he could be that person, that one person you crave. He could be anything you’d ever need. 

“Oh! Heres someone! He’s cute…I guess” he watches you read and contemplate. He can see the indents of your brows and your bottom lip disappearing into your teeth, and he can visually see you thinking about a date. NOT CONFIRMING, but thinking. 

Emotions surge through him. Is he really going to stand by for an 8th date just to risk the idea of you walking in here with a smile plastered on your face?

No.

“Fuck!” he runs his hands up and down his face, which makes your head snap up. You stare at his stressed-out face, and his hands slap down to his lap as he stares at you, thinking about something.

“Fuck what?” you ask in a small voice. 

“Fuck this, I’m sorry, but I’m done waiting” he grabs both sides of your face to bring you closer to him, smashing your lips on his. His kiss is anything but gentle or soft; it's hurried and sloppy. He thinks you’ll push him away; thats why his kiss is hurried, trying to get every taste of you savored and memorized before you run away. 

But you don’t. To his surprise and yours, you lean in. moaning into his mouth and reaching around to grasp his head to deepen the kiss. 

You both part for a breath, not realizing how long your tongues had been intertwined. “I—I’m sorry. I—I just…I couldn’t,” he stutters, failing his words. 

Now, it's your turn to grab his face and softly connect your lips, and now it's your turn to lead the kiss. You take your time, swiping your tongue along his bottom lip and twirling your tongue, which makes both of you see stars. This time when you part, he immediately attacks your neck with little kisses, sucking on the skin just above your collarbone. 

Your eyes roll to the back of your head, relishing the feeling of his soft lips on your skin. You always imagined what his lips would feel like… soft, warm, and inviting, with a hint of urgency and a touch of tenderness.

You roll your head back, giving him more access to your skin. Minho growls at your invitation, taking advantage of your exposed neck. He litters your skin with love bites, making sure to go over each with his tongue, leaving beautiful red marks that you surely won’t be able to cover up in the morning. 

You can feel your panties drip with arousal, knowing all this foreplay is only adding to the turn in your stomach, “Minho, please,” you whine. Minho disconnects himself from your neck, and you gasp at the sight of him. His eyes are blown, his lips are swollen from all the kissing, and his chest heaves out of control with each breath. 

You bite your lip at the sight of him. “I had a very nice dream that started like this."

“Oh yeah?” you perk, shifting your position so you are straddling his lap on the couch. “What was it about?” you asked, curious about his fanites about you. 

“I dreamt of your legs wrapped around my waist.” You fully seat your ass on his growing hard-on, and his eyes close in a heavenly way, “Your head was thrown back so I could mark your neck,” he groans out as you start to rock your hips back and forth. The tip of his cock pushes against your clit every time. 

Words are lost as you continue your movements, but Minho keeps going, describing his vivid dream: "You were screaming my name as I rammed myself into you.” his last word left his lips, and his hips bucked into you; his groin pushing straight up to your core. 

You moan loudly, not caring if the neighbors might hear. Before you can protest, Minho is grabbing you by cupping your ass and lifting you so he can carry you to his bedroom. The second he slams you down onto the bed, he’s ripping your clothes off, leaving you bare before him, and he's throwing his clothes somewhere in a far-off corner. 

You gaze at the sight of him. You’ve seen him shirtless before, but always on accident, not daring to look a second further, but now you have a chance to gaze, a chance to ogle over every defined line of his body. He’s perfectly toned and perfectly built, and the little scar on the underside of his stomach sticks out like a sore thumb, almost like a birthmark. 

He waits for you to say something, do something…You lean up, never breaking eye contact with him, a place a gentle kiss on his scar. You never minded it, in fact, the deepest parts of you thought it was sexy, but you knew he didn’t like it. 

His gaze met yours with a newfound intensity, a subtle smile playing at the corner of his lips, hinting at a mischievous thought. And then you realized your position.

He brought his hand carefully up to the side of your cheek guiding you to your covered erection. He was still in his boxers, the tight elastic taunting you. 

You look up to him one last time for permission and he urges you on. You hook your finger into the band and tug down his boxers, letting his cock spring free. 

Your eyes widen and your breath freezes. Your mouth waters at the sight of a long, thick, prominent vein outlining his entire length. The tip budging and red, begging for attention, and the precum that leaks has you instinctively wetting your lips. 

“I’ll take it that you like what you see,” he smirks. 

You steadily reach out and fist his cock; the feeling makes him hiss. You know from past experiences how tight a guy enjoys it…but you decided to be a tease and loosely stroke his cock. 

“Tease me some more, and I’ll show you my reaction,” His deep, guttural growl reverberates through the air, sending a chill down your spine and causing you to clench in response to his intimidating words.

Immediately, you correct your hand, tightening your grip. You see him hold back moans and whimpers from how painfully he’s biting his lip, and the sight makes you pool in your panties. Experimentally you dart your tongue out to the tip of his cock, coating it in small kitten licks. A small guttural groan escapes past his lips, which sends a strike of confidence through your body. With that same confidence, you part your lips, letting his length past them. Finally, He releases a series of beautiful, melodic whimpers that echo through the room along with the sinful noises you make, taking the full length of his cock. 

You’re so focused on not gagging on his cock that you don’t realize that Minho has full eyes on you, watching your lips wrap around him. Watching you fully engulfed with him makes him twitch, shit….he’s not gonna last long.

His cock throbs heavily on your greedy tongue, the rich, creamy flavor of his pre-cum already embedded in your mind. You begin to bob your head back and forth, sucking the rim of his cock into your mouth. 

 He’s wanted this for so long that he didn’t realize how good you’d actually feel. Mindlessly he grips your hair and yanks you off of his cock. He pushes your shoulders down and falls on top of you, kissing your lips. He can taste the saltiness of his precum on your lips, which only makes him hungrier for more. 

His tongue demands entrance, and you're quick to grant it. Without thinking, you wrap your legs around his waist, pulling his free cock closer to your bare core. You can feel him slip around against your sensitive lips with all the wetness thats gathered. 

You both sigh at the feeling. His tip only catches your entrance with every steady hump but never fully settles into you. “Minho!” you whine. 

With one last playful smirk he sends your way, he FINALLY pushes his entire length into you. You can feel every vein, every ridge of himself, and every small twitch he makes. 

He watches every single movement of your face, watching it contort in pleasure. His eyes shut tight as he tries with every fiber of himself not to ruin the moment, to let you relish in being stretched open for him. He wants so badly to lose control and pound into you, but he knows you need time. 

He can feel you clenching, the tightness of your cunt making him curse under his breath. “Baby, please tell me I can move,” he said, leaning his forehead against yours. 

Words are lost; they die on your tongue before you can force them out, so you respond with a quiet nod of your head. He takes it, and he starts rocking his hips slowly into you. 

Your mouth parts and the feeling of him pushed all the way inside you; you could swear you could see the smallest bump outlining your stomach, disappearing when Minho rocks out and reappearing when he rocks back into you. 

Minho picks up his pace every so slightly, all the while connecting his eyes with yours. You grip the sheets, holding back your screams, your mind already a mess of pleasure. 

“God, you’re so beautiful,” he whimpers. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted you like this.” He places a chaste kiss on your lips, “Please, Y/N…Please let me show how badly I want you.” He takes a breath, never slowing down in his pace. “Let me show you how much I love you.”

His words make your chest swell, and they almost bring tears to your eyes. “O-okay. How much do you love me, Minho?” 

Your words hang in the air like cigarette smoke before Minho takes action. His hips become pistons. Slamming into you with no pause in sight. You can’t hold back your screams anymore; you scream his name over and over, letting him know who you belong to. 

His thumb sneaks down to trace lazy circles that make your whole body shiver. “I love you, Y/N, I do,” he all but cries.

Your mind is so blown out with pleasure and overwhelming happiness that tears begin to roll down your cheeks. “Say it back, Y/N, please!” he begs. 

“I love you too!” you come crashing as your words bounce off the walls. Shivering on Minho's cock, and that is all he needs to find his release, coating your inner gummy walls white. 

Minho makes no move to pull out, settling still inside you as he collapses on top of you, enveloping your lips with his. You both break the kiss, locking eyes with one another. 

"I love you," you whisper, the words carrying the weight of all the moments you've shared together, the laughter and tears, the late-night conversations and quiet moments. As you speak, you feel the depth of your emotions, the profound connection that binds you together. He looks at you, his eyes reflecting the memories you've made, and in that moment, you see a new tenderness, a deeper understanding, and something unspoken. It's as if all the unspoken words, all the gestures and glances, converge in this single moment. You know he loves you back…..you’ve always known. 

[mrfeenysmustache]

Banner art by @cakeit0n

Written for Discord Drabble Night

All word counts: 100

Prompt One: Cold

The blood on his hands. The ice in his veins. The rage in his heart.

There was a lot about him that others didn’t understand, and her feelings for him bewildered her friends.

But they didn’t see him. The gentle way he held her hand. The heat of his body wrapped around her in the night. The passion that simmered below the surface of his skin. The softness of him when he pulled her close, kissed her face, said her name.

He was controlled. He was reserved. He did not suffer any fools.

But there was nothing cold about him.

Prompt Two: Blur

In a blur of yoki, the silver fur that covered his body shortened and his body shrank and shifted, leaving behind a bedraggled man with knotted hair, tattered clothes and half feral eyes.

He took a deep breath and held it.

He recognized that scent.

Hundreds of years roaming countrysides hiding, waiting, searching, and Sesshomaru had lost nearly all his sense in isolation, but this scent held promise.

He stepped out of the trees onto the path, and beloved blue eyes widened and watered.

“Sesshomaru!”

She was in his arms and he sighed in relief.

He’d found her. Home.

Finally.

Prompt Three: Grim

“Oh, this is grim indeed.” Sango’s voice was serious, sympathetic. Grave.

Pitying.

Kagome rolled her eyes and huffed.

“I know it’s a long shot but I can’t help it! I can’t explain it either. He’s just… different from what everyone else thinks!”

Sango looked skeptical, Miroku ignored them to search through her underwear drawer, but Inuyasha snorted harshly from his spot lounging across the bed.

“A long shot. FEH! That bastard’s been mooning after you for months. Will y’all just bone and get it over with before you drive me crazy?!”

“Uuugh, Inuyasha!” She chased him cackling from the room.

Prompt Four: dread

A woman’s scream, sharp and shrill, sliced through his sensitive ears and ricocheted down his spine.

He smirked.

The part he’d been waiting for, the one he knew she’d been dreading, had finally arrived and the results had been better than expected.

He’d always said he had no use for horror movies. As long lived and powerful as he was he’d seen plenty of real, actual horror. But the way the sweetly scented woman pressed her soft body into his side, buried her pretty face into his chest, cling to him for safety and protection, had him reassessing those opinions.

Prompt Five: Shadow

Touching down at the edge of the little sun warmed meadow, Sesshomaru flared his aura, smiling softly as the door to the little hut opened and two puppy eared children raced out and leapt into his arms.

Kagome followed slowly, stomach round with another life. He nuzzled her hair, wrapped her in his arms, ignored the sadness in the depths of her eyes as he listened to the children tell him of their latest adventures.

He longed to bring them out of the shadows but it was still too dangerous, and he was not his father-

He would keep them.

Prompt Six: Ominous

Her heart fluttered rapidly, her palms sweat, and she around nervously, the ominous silence in this part of the forest putting her on edge.

The leaves rustled, branches cracked, the sound of footsteps echoed all around, and then out of nothing stepped the spirit of the forest.

Sesshomaru.

There he stood, beautiful and otherworldly, silently waiting for her request.

“M-my… my brother is sick, I’ve lost my job, I have no more money to help my mother with.”

“You know the price of my assistance.”

“Yes. My firstborn.”

He smirked, sending a bold of heat through her.

“Let’s get started.”

Prompt Seven: Obscure

“Grain Preparation in the Feudal Era” was an obscure class, one you could only attend at 8 am on Wednesdays on the farthest corner of the campus. It was related to her major, the one she’d chosen to keep her connected to her people and adventures in the past.

She was taking it for Professor Sessho Wantanabe, a professor who’s name she hadn’t noticed before.

Her heart thundered as she stood at the door, pushing it open slowly and gasping at the sight of him, golden eyes glowing warmly.

“I found you.” She breathed, and he rushed to her side.

Prompt Eight: Fear

He noticed her smile.

He noticed her glowing eyes.

He noticed the subtle notes and shifts in her scent.

He noticed the way his skin burned when she touched his arm.

He liked the way her cheeks bloomed like roses when he spoke softly to her.

When some fool in the village proposed to her it took all his strength not to rip his head from his shoulders.

When she was snatched naked from a hot spring by a bat demon he raged that someone had seen her so bare and vulnerable.

It was as he feared- he loved her.

Prompt Nine: Smother

Kagome twirled her fingers through the tendrils of silver silk that fell over her skin as his mouth smothered every inch of her body with his lips and tongue and teeth.

She closed her eyes and sighed, her blood singing and body humming, sated yet starved even after being locked away with him for days in his rooms once the ceremony linking them for eternity completed.

He crept back up, captured her lips, pressed her into the sheets with his full weight, sending her thoughts into a tailspin until they centered back on him and she sighed his name.

“Sesshomaru.”

Prompt Ten: Balance

Wearing her new white summer dress for her current visit to the Feudal era had seemed like a good idea that morning.

It was a clear summer day and she’d be sitting by the river while Rin and Shippo swam and played. The other adults were busy helping build Inuyasha’s hut for his new bride, but she’d been happy to volunteer to watch them.

Until she’d tripped and fallen in. Sesshomaru had shown up, eyes plastered to her chest in her now transparent white dress.

“Your balance is abysmal,” he said, “but I cannot say I find the results displeasing.”

[ichor-and-symbiosis]

Rest. (NSFWish)

You found Tomura sunken into your bedsheets, clothing and all, with the expression of someone who is altogether dead to the world. His chest barely moved from controlled breathing, and if you took a peak beneath the bandages, you would surely find a frown line etched into his damaged skin.

Tomura did not react to your arrival. You wordlessly locked the door behind you and took in the sight. He did not even remove his shoes, but thankfully he knew by now that you would lose your mind if he had climbed into bed with them still on. His legs dangled off the side of the bed, and you were struck with the sudden urge to help him undress.

So you do just that. Tomura did little more than shift and peer at you through heavily lidded eyes as you placed your first aid kit beside you on the floor and carefully unlaced his shoes. You removed his socks for good measure and chucked them away lest you died from the smell. Grabbing your kit, you climbed over Tomura’s prone form and left the plastic box off to the side as you rested your ass on his pelvis to avoid harming his recently healed leg.

“I heard your injuries were acting up after the meeting,” you finally said, your fingers working on the knot of his tie. “Can I take a look?”

Tomura tisked and looked away. “It’s not a big deal.”

“I don’t understand why you don’t tell Ujiko about this. Or me."

“Better to just get used to this shit.”

“If you’re referring to you getting used to being in pain, then no. Not on my watch.” You slid the tie from his collar, tossed it aside, and began undoing the buttons of his shirt. "And if you’re referring to me having to get used to seeing you like this, then also no.”

The conversation died out, as it always did. Tomura was well aware of your thoughts on his horrible self-care, and you did not have the energy to hound him for it for the millionth time. Your efforts were focused on something far more pressing — removing that damn shirt. You pulled on the lapels to get him to rise up a bit, and Tomura winced as he complied.

And yet, of course he would put up a struggle. You stared down at him without a hint of amusement as he leered up at you, loosely wrapping his arms around your waist. “I need help removing my shirt, Nurse,” he teased, looking every bit the insufferable bastard.

You cupped his face and smoothed your thumbs over the bandages. The dark circles under his eyes looked worse and worse every day. The temptation to kiss them was quickly growing to be unbearable.

The glint in his eyes dimmed a little as you caressed him. He rested his forehead against your sternum, letting out a soft sigh when you dug your fingers in his hair and ran them down behind his ears, trailing further down his neck and hooking them beneath his opened shirt to coax it off his shoulders. Your heart raced as he mouthed a weak kiss to your exposed skin.

A chilling gust of wind blew in through the open window, causing him to shiver as you removed his shirt. “Why in the world did you open the window in the middle of winter?” you asked, hugging him close to you.

Tomura buried his face in your chest. “Needed to get rid of the stuffy sex funk in here.”

“Liar, you’d turn our musk into cologne if you could.” He huffed a short laugh. You stroked his back and kissed the top of his head. “You just wanted a reason to cuddle without outright asking for it.”

He grunted in response. Wow, he must be feeling pretty awful if he’s refusing to take the bait.

You focused your attention on the bandages wrapped around his right arm, unwinding them with practiced ease. Tomura’s eyes bore into you while you worked.

The further you unraveled the bandages, the more your gut twisted with anxiety. His skin was cracked and fraying at the seams, exposing darkened sinewy muscles that refused to heal. “It’s gotten worse,” you whispered, clutching the bloodied bandages for a moment before throwing them off the bed as though they burned your hands. “I don’t understand, Ujiko said the ointment would at least stop the progression — “

Tomura placed a hand over your mouth to silence you. The cold tingle of his prosthetic seeped into your lips. “Don’t worry about it. It’s getting taken care of, okay?”

He had a sharp gleam in his eyes that brokered no further questions. You decided to trust him — whatever Tomura had been discussing with the doctor recently, it had to be for his ultimate benefit, right?

The last thing he needed was for you to lose your mental fortitude. Especially these days, with the League’s fate hanging by a thread under the shadow of the Liberation Front. Your lover had grand plans, and you chose to believe that he had taken your feelings into consideration. Come what may, Tomura would be alright. He had to be.

You meekly nodded. Tomura softened his expression, traced his thumb over your bottom lip, and let his hand fall back to the bed as he held out his damaged arm to you. You continued your ministrations, rubbing the ointment over his skin with utmost care and tenderly wrapping the wounds as you worked with singleminded determination. You could do this much for Tomura, at least.

You placed your hands on his chest and lightly pushed him back onto the sheets. He followed your silent command and stared up at you with an inscrutable expression, equal parts guarded yet yearning for you. His fingers twitched by his side as he held back from dragging you to him. Smiling lightly, you leaned down to press a lingering kiss to his mouth. His lips were warm and soft despite the chapped texture, so wonderfully unique. You coaxed his mouth open with a teasing swipe of your tongue, and he let out a barely-there moan as you tangled your tongue with his own.

The shift of his hips against yours reminded you that you were not finished. You brought the kiss to a swift end, giggling when he leaned up to peck your lips one last time before falling back and relenting to your plans. His pants and underwear were removed in short order — you flushed at the sight of his cock springing free — and Tomura readjusted his position on the bed while you quickly discarded your clothing to join him under the thick comforter.

To your surprise, Tomura draped his bandaged arm across your waist and rested his head on your shoulder. His erection prodded your thigh, yet neither of you were in a hurry to seek relief from this ever-present sexual tension that lingered whenever you were alone together.

You wrapped your arms around him and kissed his forehead. “Does your arm still hurt?”

“You know it does.”

Ever the blunt one. You buried your nose in his hair and closed your eyes, hugging him closer to you. “What am I going to do with you … "

“I can think of a few suggestions.” You could hear the impish smile in his voice.

A wandering hand trailed upwards along your side and found itself resting innocently on your breast. “I’m not entertaining those suggestions when your body is falling apart.” You jolted when he pinched your nipple in retaliation.

“And yet you were practically begging me to fuck you in the shower last night,” he grumbled.

“For all we know, that’s probably what caused your injuries to flare up today. Maybe we need to be more careful.”

“Uuugh.” Before Tomura could grouse any further, another cold breeze crept in to wreak havoc. You smirked when he curled himself fully around you and groaned.

“Didn’t think your window scheme through, did you?”

“Should have fucking closed it when you came in … “

“Should have been less awkward about cuddles.”

Tomura shifted his head to glare up at you. “Aren’t you supposed to be making me feel better?”

You rolled your eyes and pressed his face back to your chest. “Go to sleep already.”

“How am I supposed to do that when you’re suffocating me with your tits?”

“Is that a complaint I hear?”

Tomura paused. “Nope.”

He turned his head and kissed the top of your breast. Seemingly satisfied with the turn of events, his lips trailed downwards, hovering over your pert nipple as his tongue darted out to tease the stiff bud. You carded your fingers through his hair and sighed appreciatively, arching your back as he began to suckle your nipple.

Even when you were supposed to be taking care of your lover, he still found ways to turn the attention back onto you. Although … with that pleased expression lighting up his features, you wondered if he really was benefitting from this somehow. The stiff heat of his erection rutting against your thigh was certainly a telltale sign.

You let him take control. It just felt so damn good to have him lavish you with his intoxicating kisses, like a balm to your weary soul. His injured arm gripped you as tight as it could. You placed a hand over it and sighed his name, and for some odd reason, Tomura ceased his lascivious actions.

You tilted your head to look down — he was staring at you, his mouth pressed into a slight frown and his crimson eyes wide and vulnerable. This was not an expression you saw often. It brought a furious blush to your cheeks, yet you were too captivated by his gentle face to look away.

“You know I appreciate you, right?” he said, voice steady and firm. Confident. Filled with truth.

Your blush darkened tenfold. “I … “ You looked away then, feeling yourself crumble under his stare. “ … th-thank you.”

Tomura wriggled up your body to sneak flirty kisses along your neck. “I mean it,” he murmured into your skin. “You keep me grounded.”

Unable to resist any longer, you gripped his hair and angled his face up towards you to capture his lips. It had only been a hasty, desperate motion done in the heat of the moment. You didn’t mean for it to turn into a slow makeout session — yet here you were, your hands smoothing over his scarred back as Tomura cupped your cheek with his bandaged hand and allowed your tongue to explore his mouth.

You released his mouth with a wet pop. “What did I say about taking things slow?”

“You said to be careful," he whispered, his eyes honed in on your puffy lips. “That’s a huge difference.”

“In the morning,” you replied. “Please, just let your body rest. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

Tomura searched your face for a moment before settling back into place, head against your shoulder and arm looped around your waist once more. You huffed a soft laugh at his petulant compliance and petted his hair, only allowing yourself to drift off to sleep when you finally heard his breathing even out into a slow, steady rhythm.

[eleanor-devil]

Boruto: Sacrifices [Remade] | Chap.10 - Hardest Battle

Written by: Eleanor-Devil & @mirage-05​​

Prologue | Chap.1 | Chap.2 | Chap.3 | Chap.4 | Chap.5 | Chap.6 | Chap.7 | Chap.8 | Chap.9 | Chap. 10 - You’re here

Checking on her daughter to make sure she was tucked in safely, Hinata’s eyes drifted back to the clock on the wall. Naruto was running late… Of course, that wouldn’t be the first time. The woman had adjusted to the life as the Hokage’s wife smoothly and without a complaint, she knew Naruto’s dedication to his duties and that was one of the many qualities she admired in the man she loved. And with the village still on high alert after the recent attack, she knew it was Naruto’s top priority to see the village to safety and peace once again before being able to rest properly. But it wasn’t very usual for him to call Boruto to his office at such a late hour. It was already past midnight… and something nagging at the back of her mind gave the woman a chilled feeling. She sighed and leaned down to gently caress Hima’s hair as the little girl mumbled and shivered in her sleep. And just then, there was a soft knock on the door. As quietly but quickly as she could, Hinata went down the stairs. She opened the door and came face to face with her husband. Or well… a clone of his. For her Byakugan induced eyesight, even when the dojutsu wasn’t activated, it was a very clear distinction. “Naruto…” she whispered, concern and apprehension in her voice, especially because she noticed the grave look on his face. “Hinata-san…” Ironically, the clones would always address her with honorifics, although it was a little awkward for the young woman. “Naruto-san will not be able to come home tonight. There has been another attack.”

The woman’s heart skipped a beat. “Is it… bad…?” she managed to ask, her mind immediately snapping to her son. “No, it has already been thwarted, but…” Naruto’s voice faded away as he had to look away for a minute. “But… something unfortunate has happened.” “Naruto…” Hinata was almost hesitant to ask. “Boruto’s friend, Mitsuki… he was attacked by the assailants. He was taken to the hospital, and both Naruto-san and Boruto are with him now.” The woman’s hands flew to her mouth, her eyes widening. Shock was still the dominant expression on her features when she was eventually able to lower her hands a minute later. “A-and how is Mitsuki-kun…?” Naruto sighed. “We don’t know all the details yet but… I’m afraid it doesn’t look very good. We will keep you updated.” Not able to say anything more, Hinata just nodded, and had to lean against the door sill as the clone disappeared in a puff. … The first thing Shikadai noticed as he was heading to the border for his patrol duty was that there was an abnormal activity in the village for this late hour. The jounins were rushing everywhere, apparently in a big hurry, and whispers… there was a great deal of whispering going around. And although he didn’t stop to listen to most of them because duty was awaiting, the young Nara caught some words… “new attack”... “genin”... Just what was going on…? Well… surely he would find out when he reached his post. He had always viewed these late-night patrols as a kind of a drag, but now he was feeling anxious, restless… At first, it didn’t seem like anyone was going to pay attention to him when he arrived at the border. It had been almost a solid minute before he finally came across a familiar face. “Mirai!” The young woman strode over to him, looking a bit distraught and… very confused. “Shikadai… what are you doing here?” “Uuugh… I have the next shift...” “Oh…” This fact, for some reason, seemed to be an inconvenience to the Sarutobi. “Look… the circumstances have changed. You are no longer on patrol duty.” “What? But…” Now he was more alert and anxious than ever. “Mirai, just… what’s going on? I heard something about a new attack…” A pensive look settled in Mirai’s red eyes. “Yes… there has been an attack not even an hour ago. It was thwarted, but…” She didn’t continue for a moment. Shikadai’s eyes widened. “The genin…” The woman sighed. “I don’t know all the details… Only that… apparently Konohamaru-nii-san’s team got involved and now they’re in the hospital. I don’t know which one of them got hurt.” She might not, but with a sinking feeling in his stomach, Shikadai realized he probably had a good idea who. After all, there was only one known hot-head in the team. Mirai clamped a hand on his shoulder, giving him a small but gentle smile. “There’s nothing for you to do here now. Just go home and rest.” As she turned and walked away from him, the Nara muttered to himself. “Sure… I’ll do just that.” ... He had a bad feeling about this. He had just barely seen Kurama bringing in two men before a call came from the hospital, stating that 0 blood type was needed immediately. So, curious as he was, and being also someone that happened to have that blood type, he had rushed to the hospital. To put it mildly, there was total chaos going on. It took Kakashi a while to finally stop a nurse. "I came for the blood donation..." "Oh, Lord Sixth," a relieved look came over the nurse's face. "You are type O, right? Please, follow me." She brought him to a small room. Kakashi was too wired up to sit still. "What is the situation?" he asked as the needle pierced his skin. "The Hokage will come here to inform you in a second." the nurse said simply. Indeed, as soon as the nurse finished and rushed out with the blood bag, Naruto walked in. "I'm so glad you could come, Kakashi-sensei..." "What's going on, Naruto? I came as quickly as I can..." "Just in time, too. The surgery has only begun a few minutes ago, we needed immediate-" Before Naruto could finish, there was a ruckus outside. “Yamanaka Inojin, I thought we taught you better manners than to come barging in a hospital!” “But we came for the blood donation too!” “You don’t have the correct blood type, young man.” “These are our friends we are talking about!” Perplexed, the Hokage turned to the door of the room as six agitated-looking genins indeed pretty much barged in, followed closely by a strict and exasperated looking Ino. “Lord Seventh, forgive me, I did try to stop them.” Naruto nodded wordlessly to her. The kids, on the other hand, seemed to have totally forgotten about hospital rules in their panic, they all started talking at once. “Lord Seventh - I heard it on the news-” “And I spoke to the border guards-” “Where are Boruto, Sarada and Mitsuki?” “Are they okay?” As they paused for a minute to catch their breath, Kakashi leveled a gaze to his old student. “I’d say you owe an explanation to all of us.” Naruto sighed before conceding with a nod. “I will. Let’s just move out of here.” … “Boruto…” the young Uzumaki heard Sarada’s voice all of a sudden, which was the only thing that made him turn away from the doors that directed to the surgery room. He didn’t even have time to blink as two blurred green and purple shapes moved forward, and a second later he was being hugged tightly by Metal and Sumire. “You- you guys…” he managed to stammer as he felt a pang in his heart. “We heard about the attack…” Metal said sadly as they pulled back. “But I didn’t imagine it would be… damn…” Shikadai shook his head as he took in his best friend’s appearance, mainly… his blood-soaked shirt, that was something hard to miss… especially when said shirt used to be white and it was now massively tinted in dark red. “Lord Seventh told us what he could…” “Is Mitsuki-kun gonna be okay…?” Sumire asked in a tiny voice. “We… we don’t know…” Sarada stammered in a shaky voice, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. “Well, we didn’t come too long ago… All we know is… he left us a letter telling us he was leaving Konoha and-” “What?!” was the collective response they received from their friends, which resulted in a passing nurse shooting a disapproving look at the group and then hushing them. “What do you mean, leaving Konoha?” Inojin said at last, flabbergasted. “Yeah… that’s one thing he’s gonna have to answer to us for when he gets better…” Boruto’s voice faltered as he looked at the doors again, and his next word was almost inaudible. “If…” “Hey hey, what’s with the pessimistic attitude?” Chocho said, rubbing her best friend’s arm. “Mitsuki is strong, right?” “One of the best in our class,” Metal added with a kind smile. “There’s no way he will just give up like that, I won’t believe it!” Iwabe supported them firmly. They were finally able to bring a thin smile to the faces of the remaining members of Team Konohamaru. “Thanks guys…” Just then, Ino approached them. “I appreciate your concerns about your friends but you really can’t all stay in here, and there’s no point, we don’t know how long the surgery will take.” The kids definitely looked reluctant to leave, but there was nothing to it. One by one, they bid goodbye and started to leave but Shikadai didn’t move. “I will stay with you guys.” he said determinedly. ”I won’t be able to rest properly if I don’t know Mitsuki is okay.” … There was no news. Simple as that. It had been hours now and there was still nothing about Mitsuki's state and how the surgery was going. There had already been an exchange between the medics and they all looked exhausted, it was clear to the adults that the situation wasn't good... Naruto was trying to control himself from pacing around the halls, it would only put the kids nervous, and right now they were calm, smiling softly at something they were watching on Boruto's phone, they did not need to have a nervous crisis because of him. So instead of pacing, he sighed... again. He looked sideways at Orochimaru, who... hadn't changed his position much or at all since his son had been taken down the hall, standing at the very same spot, not having even moved an inch. His arms were crossed, his fingers tight. His eyes, hard and cold as steel, were glued to the surgery hall's doors. Minutes ticked away, slowly, agonizingly turning into another half an hour... 'Please...' Naruto thought, closing his eyes for a minute. 'Please help him... Please let this turn out alright...' The doors of the hall opened and everyone's eyes turned to it but no sight of Mitsuki in his bed. Instead who came out was one of the medics. He didn't look exhausted but he seemed close to it, so Naruto guessed it was yet another shift. But instead, the medic stopped close to him before bowing. "Lord Hokage..." he started. His heart skipped a beat and he tried his hardest to not think of every single thing that could have gone wrong inside that surgery room. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Ino and Kiba moving a little closer to the kids, while Sasuke, Konohamaru and Kakashi moved closer to him and the medic. The Hokage gulped once, and although keeping the calm tone to it, his whisper came out a little strained. "How is he holding up?" The medic sighed through the mask. "He lost a lot of blood but thanks to the donation he is stable. The surgery is still going but it's very complicated. His heart was damaged by the lightning, I'm afraid that will leave a scar but..." He stopped for a moment before he continued. "...but that will be the least of his problems if he... if he survives..." 'If...?' The hollow word echoed in the man's mind, leaving behind horror and a terrible sadness...  He slowly raised his hand to grab the front of his cloak, where his heart is. It felt like he couldn't hold it in place... "What... what do you mean, the least of his problems...?" The medic sighed again before looking back at the Hokage. "Lord Seventh... if the boy survives this... it will be a miracle if he doesn't get a heart condition after that lightning trauma he suffered to his chest... all in all I’m afraid to say that his heart might become very weak." The silence the medic's words left behind was... deafening. A lump had formed in his throat, and trying to gulp it down, Naruto felt a lone tear making its way down his cheek. "Excuse me... I need to go back." "Thank you..." he managed to whisper. Please... please bring the child back to us, safe and sound, he wanted to add... But words simply didn't form… “I just don’t get it…” Konohamaru muttered, his hands pushing hair out of his eyes, although the motion looked more like he was pulling his hair out. “Mitsuki wouldn’t just barge in battle without fully assessing his enemy, he knows better… And lightning is his second main chakra nature, he never once lost a battle that way…” "You said that he sent a distress message to you?" Kakashi intervened. "Yes..." Something then clicked on the Hokage's mind, and he turned to look at his former sensei. "You think he heard something he shouldn't and had to defend himself when he was attacked?" "Well, that would be my best guess. Or he tried to turn back and warn the guards, and that was when those ninjas found him." The older man's tone was disgusted. "It's something we will know once the interrogations are over." "Heartless cowards," Konohamaru growled, so mad that he was shaking. "So they thought it was easier to go all out against a child... Didn't even have the courage to face stronger ninjas..." Silence once again reigned over them as they returned to their torturous wait. Sasuke glanced over his friend for a brief second, then walked over to him. "Naruto..." he said silently, apparently only for him to hear. "Maybe it's not the time for this but... We should also consider the possibility that the boy could have some connection with those ninjas." The Hokage's head immediately snapped to him, a confused look on his expression. "What is that even supposed to mean?" "You know what I mean. Maybe this was not a coincidental attack." Naruto's eyes hardened, so much so that they looked like two dark storm clouds. "You are right. This is not the time, nor the place." "We can't just disregard this. For just one time, use your head. With Orochimaru here-" "That's enough." the blond cut in, and his tone was so sharp and unrelenting that Sasuke had to close his mouth, only with a slight frown on his face. "There is a child in there, the same age as our children, fighting for his life. Put your heart in it for once, and just pray." They didn't say anything more to each other after that. Naruto glanced once again at the Sannin, who had not moved, at all. Realizing that he had to tell him about what they had learned, the Hokage took a deep breath, gathering his courage, and approached the older man, Sasuke right behind him. "Do not waste your breath." the man practically spat out of his teeth. "I heard all of it." "Orochimaru..." Naruto tried to start, but he was cut into yet again. "So you all think that my son is somehow related to those ninjas?" the man continued, and the blond had to gulp, not knowing what to say. "Be glad... be glad that my son tried to protect your worthless lives even when he was barely clinging to life, because if I had not promised him... We would not be having this conversation right now." The Hokage closed his mouth in a tight line when those words left the Sannin's mouth. He didn't know what promise Orochimaru had made to his son but he was clearly holding on to it... "What... promise?" he dared to ask. "A promise to not crush this village. He seemed to think this was not your fault... Although I fail to see why." The Sannin's voice was almost emotionless until this point, but the hint of a dangerous threat etched its way to his tone as he spoke next. "Just know this... My promise is only ever valid if Mitsuki makes it out of there... So you better start praying that he keeps holding on." he finished in a low, venomous hiss, his eyes moving to Sasuke for a fraction of a second. Naruto felt another lump in his throat but didn't look away... Instead he looked into the Sannin's cold golden eyes. "That is not the only reason why I am praying." The Sannin just kept glaring at him with those icy eyes, unimpressed. After a moment of assessing the Hokage, he finally spoke again. "Tell me one thing. Why... did Mitsuki decide to leave Konoha in the first place?" Naruto didn't know what to say... the situation was already bad enough as it was, with Orochimaru threatening to end Konoha if Mitsuki didn't survive... What would he do when he found out about the harassments...? But... he couldn't hide it either... better tell the truth now. Sighing, he looked down. "Three days ago... there was an attack in Konoha's orphanage. Everything pointed that it had been you behind the attack and... Mitsuki suffered the consequences of that. Because he is your child..." And just like that, Orochimaru felt his careful control slipping, albeit only a little, and managed to control the shaking of his hands, of anger. "So that was your idea of peace...? I thought Konoha had become a better place... Yet my son had to suffer the aftermath of an attack - which I have not even heard of, mind you." He was silent for a moment, and then squinted. "What kind of consequences?" he demanded, a dangerous tone audible in his whisper. This caught Naruto's attention. He knew that the Sannin, from years of experience, would praise an attack if he had been the one behind it but... that wasn't the case now. "You mean you weren't behind the attack...?" "I guarantee you, if it was indeed me behind the attack, I would not go into hiding like some coward," he hissed through his teeth. "I always play my cards on the table, if you did not notice that just a moment ago. What motive would I have to attack your village?" A venomous glint came into his eyes as he asked once again. "What kind of consequences?" Naruto gulped... No... he couldn't just go and say that the clans were the ones behind the harassments against Mitsuki, not when he was dealing with Orochimaru. "Children... that's all... they played some... pranks against Mitsuki." "Do you think... even for a minute... that I believe my son was driven out of the village because of some childish pranks...?" His anger and hatred were brewing deeper down. He hated being lied to - especially when he was doing the exact opposite. "Tell me the truth." What could he do…? Orochimaru was clearly losing his patience. But he was the Hokage and although the clans were at fault, he couldn't expose them like that "I..." he started. "The clans did it. They ordered harassments to be held against your son." A new voice joined the conversation and although Orochimaru just moved his eyes, Naruto turned his head completely in Sasuke's direction. "And they were done, by children." "Sasuke...!" Naruto hissed, low. The Uchiha eyed his friend with his usual calm look. "Those people are grown-ups, Naruto. They knew clearly what they were doing. If they had courage to do that then they also should have the guts to deal with the consequences." He eyed his former sensei once again. "Children, however, can be very easily manipulated into the best soldiers, they don't question, they don't think if it's right and they don't think of consequences." "Oh, there will be consequences, you can be sure of that. If Mitsuki doesn't survive... the clans won't survive to see another day. I guarantee you will suffer for all eternity." He silently added, 'Like I am now...' in his head, his mouth a thin, straight line. "The matter is already being taken care of..." said Naruto. "The clans are not going unpunished for what they did, I assure you of that." The Hokage then sighed, the matter from before suddenly returned to his mind. "I still don't understand...why they would attack him... Kakashi-sensei theorizes that he might've heard something..." "He would not let rogue ninjas discover him...!" He had taught the child better than that... "But in any case, he should not have been there alone." His gaze once again drifted to the doors of the surgery hall. "Especially not tonight..." The last part did catch both Naruto's and Sasuke's attention. The Uchiha narrowed his eyes as he eyed the Sannin carefully. "What do you mean by 'especially not tonight'...?" "Ever since he was little... I noticed the moon has a powerful effect on Mitsuki." the older man began. "At nights with the full moon, he would always be full of energy, there were nights he would just stay up, training or doing other things that would normally wear people down. On new moons though... he would become so weak, sometimes even to the point of falling sick." He jerked his head to the window that was not too far from them. "What moon do you think tonight is?" Naruto's eyes widened as he recalled that in that night, before Mitsuki had come to say goodbye, he had casually looked up at the night sky and noticed there was no moon. "Crap..." he murmured. Sasuke was surprised for a moment but was quick to recover. "I see... does that influence his chances of survival as well...?" At Sasuke's question, the Sannin didn't bother to say anything, his only answer was the closing of his eyes and his fists tightening a little more. As the two stayed silent, it was clear that their talk was over. He had nothing more to say, anyway. He was already going through a plan to crush all those meddling clans... The deep silence was killing Naruto, pretty much all that could be heard in that hall right now was the sound coming from the video that Boruto and Sarada were watching on the cellphone. Sighing, the blond looked at Orochimaru before asking. "How...far does the moon affect Mitsuki...?" The Sannin sighed, nearly regretting having let this information at their disposal. "The child is affected by the full cycle of the moon, as per say. As I have said, when it is nearing the full moon, he is energetic, lively, he would be hard to handle. The waning moon has the opposite effect. He would mostly spend all the night in his room, sometimes not even coming out of the bed. I remember during one cycle he got really ill, Karin had to stay up all night..." Not a random choice for name at all, he thought, his mind was far away... If what Orochimaru was saying was the full truth then Mitsuki was extremely vulnerable and weak when the ninjas attacked... had he known that it was new moon night? Had he known he would be weak at that very moment? Naruto wanted answers... badly... "I have never heard of such a thing before... I wonder why it affects him." A humorless, cold smile came to his face. He glanced for a short while to the window again, before turning his gaze back to the door of the hall. "You are aware Mitsuki is not an ordinary human, are you not?" he said simply. Orochimaru was and always will be a full mystery that Naruto would never understand... even his current words had left him more confused than ever but... he did not dare to ask for the meaning of it because he was sure... that if Orochimaru wanted them to know, he would have let them know. … Shikadai looked up at the adults with a worried look on his face, he had caught up to a couple of words from the conversation, not the full length, but it was enough for him to get the scope of it… This was serious, Mitsuki’s condition was very serious… Thankfully, though, Boruto and Sarada didn’t seem to have heard it, they were focused on the videos and photos including Mitsuki on the blond’s phone, and Ino-san had been careful about diverting their attention too. Determined to keep things that way (because heaven only knew that they couldn’t handle a breakdown from the two right now), the Nara tried to force an uplifting tone in his voice. “Hey, Boruto, why don’t you show us the next photo?” Boruto smiled a bit at his friend before turning back to face his phone, he slid his finger across the screen to the next picture but actually found a video. At the beginning he couldn't remember well what that video was about but as the scenes started going, his smile widened, though it didn't reach his eyes. "Aren't there safer ways to go on ice?" came a voice, and by the closeness of it, it was clear that the speaking person was the one who was holding the camera. The voice was easily recognizable as Mitsuki's. "Oh come on, are you telling me that you're chickening out?" a figure suddenly skated into the frame, and they were all looking into the widely-grinning face of Boruto. "If you consider making sure I don't break a leg, an arm or even lose my teeth, chickening out then so be it." replied the voice to which the Boruto in the video rolled his eyes before moving a bit away from the camera. "Aw fine. At least make sure you get everything on record, because I'm planning to use my amazing skating skills to-" WHAM! Not exactly looking at where he was going while boosting, Boruto had skated, turned around in what was supposed to be a graceful twist... and had slammed right into a huge trunk of a tree. Needless to say, Mitsuki's chuckles soon echoed through the whole video sound and it was clear that he was trying to calm himself down as the camera moved closer to Boruto and he tried to speak in between laughs. "Are you okay?" "It's not funny," the pout Boruto pulled off was so... cute and funny that in a moment, more laughter could be heard, while those who were watching the video just smiled brokenly. "Delete this, will you?" "Oooh no," Mitsuki said with a chuckle. "This, I'm definitely keeping." "No, come on man!" All that the camera was filming right now was the greyish winter sky, meaning that Mitsuki must have raised it really high so Boruto couldn't reach it. "Give it back, Mitsuki! That's so uncool!" "Nuh-uh," that was all that he got for an answer. As the only sounds after that were heard, which were the two boys horsing around and finally falling back on the ice, the video came to an end. Boruto was now gazing at the screen with slightly teary eyes, a small, fond smile on his face. "I never thought I would be glad he kept this..." he mused, then gulped. He had forgotten about the video altogether... Ino didn’t know what more comforting words to offer, it didn’t seem like anything she could say reached these two right now, so… out of her motherly instinct, she just reached out and held the blond in her arms. ... It had felt like ages... When he finally heard the doors of the surgery hall open and a general shuffling as everyone gathered, Boruto practically jumped to his feet, and the phone slid from his fingers, hitting the ground with a thud. Slowly, the stretcher on which his best friend was lying was pushed out, followed by the nurses and medics and finally Sakura and Tsunade, all of them looked very tired. It wasn't like the blond could notice anyone but his best friend right then, though. Mitsuki looked... almost peaceful, his chest rising and falling rhythmically. He could've easily been just sleeping, if not for the fact that his skin was even paler than usual, and he was covered in bandages, everywhere... His friend never seemed younger to him then he did right now. "Please, give us some space." one of the nurses urged, and Boruto noticed pretty much everyone had gathered around the stretcher. The adults drew back slightly, but Boruto, Sarada and Shikadai remained by Mitsuki's side as he was brought to his room. The Nara, for once in his life, seemed to be at a loss of words. They watched in silence as the staff connected their friend to some machines, including an oxygen supply and the heart monitor, filling the room with steady rhythms in a second. Sarada brought her hands to her mouth, trying to hold back her sobs. As Sakura and Tsunade came out after the nurses, the three approached them. "Mama, can we... go inside?" Sarada asked in a tiny voice. Sakura sighed and thought about it. "Only for a little while," she said finally. "He needs his rest." The children quickly nodded as they immediately walked inside the room. In less than a second, they were by Mitsuki's side. Boruto and Sarada grabbed his hands and squeezed them a little, not too tight of course... “Dammit, Mitsuki…” Shikadai mumbled with a catch in his voice. “How did you even get into this…?” "He’s an idiot, that’s how..." Boruto said in a whisper as he looked at his friend, biting his lip. "...do you have any idea of how much you scared us...?" Sarada sighed, Boruto was right, but if Mitsuki was hearing them, as some people claimed that while sleeping people could still hear the others on the outside… that sure wouldn't cheer him up. "He is right but… don't listen to him now..." She smiled softly. "You're going to be okay now and that's what matters..." The adults had gathered in front of the room, silently gazing inside, relieved that the kid had made it through the surgery even with such serious injuries. Konohamaru felt pride filling his heart, trying to drown the sorrow inside, as he looked at his students. "He is going to be alright..." he mumbled, more to himself than anyone really. "He sure is..." said Naruto softly. It was apparent in his features... he was grateful to God for having listened to their prayers. The Sannin was trying his hardest to keep his emotions at bay as he watched his son fighting for his life. He had always been the fighter, the strongest... His warrior spirit had not failed this time, either. He realized that he was proud... and glad - really glad that the child still carried that stubbornness... It seemed like they had been there forever, with the adults carefully watching over them, and medics dropping in every now and then to check. The three kids remained at the boy's side, talking to him... in hopes that he would soon wake up and... do something to cheer them all up. After what felt like an eternity, Boruto noticed a movement out of the corner of his eyes. "Mitsuki...?" he whispered unbelievably, as the blue-haired boy's fingers twitched once again. Sarada raised her head and looked at Mitsuki in amazement as his eyelashes fluttered slowly, his eyes opening a crack. Both of the kids gasped then, and a tearful smile made its way on the girl's face. "Mitsuki..." she whispered happily. It took a while for the blue haired boy to understand his surroundings. Where was he...? What had happened? Why did his body feel so... weak and numb...? But slowly the images of what had happened flashed in his head... the attack, the rogue ninjas... his father's arms... Mitsuki closed his eyes back for a moment before opening them again. "Bo... ruto...?" he whispered. "Sar... Sarada...?" He still couldn't make out the figures in front of him, but the blonde and black hairs seemed unmistakable… and another one… was that Shikadai…? His throat suddenly feeling parched, Mitsuki tried to gulp, but everything seemed to hurt now... Boruto was so relieved that he actually laughed - it was a broken laugh if anything, but a laugh nonetheless. "That's right, we're right here," he said, hastily wiping at his eyes to prevent the few tears from falling. "You are where you truly belong," Sarada mused in a broken voice, giving a gentle squeeze to Mitsuki's hand. Mitsuki couldn't help but return the smile with an equally broken, weak one. “Just take it easy, you’re going to be alright…” It wasn’t usual to see the always well-composed Shikadai like this, but now he looked quite shaken indeed. Mitsuki moved his golden eyes slowly to where Boruto was but looked past him, to the people outside of the room staring at him. "He is awake," he heard one of them say, though he couldn't make out who. Konohamaru had moved closer to the glass panel, a huge weight lifted from his heart as he saw his youngest student's eyes turning towards them, and couldn't help but smile himself as the general mood around him lightened with the child's awakening. "Well done kiddo... I knew you would make it..." he whispered. The boy felt his eyes burn slightly. He felt content... everyone in here was safe and sound. He had done it right... He tried to say something but no words came out. He felt his heart tug. Something... didn't feel right about this. He felt his body growing numb and cold with each passing second, so much that he had begun shaking a little. His heart was thumping loudly in his chest, he could feel each pound... but they were getting slower... 'Was this how it was supposed to be...?' he wondered. He closed his eyes for a moment, then opened them again, this time slower. Somehow... he felt this was just right, and that he... was actually ready. He gently pulled his hand out of Boruto's, reaching for something that was covering his mouth and nose. He didn't know how much strength he had left... He needed his friends to hear him... Boruto panicked a bit when he saw his friend reach for the oxygen mask. He couldn't take it off yet! He still needed it! The blond was quick to put his hand over Mitsuki's again. "Hey, easy there man. You can't take it off yet..." Sarada felt something was off, the look in Mitsuki's pale golden eyes was strange... Something wasn't right, they were so... empty, nothing like the gaze she was used to from him. Mitsuki felt a tremor shaking his body as his heart tried to do its job against all odds, even if for a few prolonged seconds. He slowly tried to raise his other hand but pain shot through it immediately. Seeing that he crumpled his face because of it, Sarada held on to his hand more tightly. With the last bit of his strength, Mitsuki gave his friends' hands a weak squeeze. "Thank you..." he whispered, and his eyes moved to Shikadai as he heard something in that steady noise change. "...for being my friends..." "What... nonsense are you talking about?" said Boruto, a worried frown crossing his features. "Why are you thanking us?" Shikadai felt his heart starting to race as his eyes widened, something was definitely wrong about this! He had been to hospitals before, he was sure he never heard the machines going haywire like this! “I-I’m going to call the medics!” he stammered to no one in particular, his friends’ attention wasn't on him. "Mi... Mitsuki..." Sarada whispered, a mix of emotions replacing her relieved one slowly as she got up from where she sat, watching the boy's chest moving slower - this was definitely not right! Her head whipped to the heart monitor as the pace picked up. Boruto didn't really know what these all meant, but their reaction gave him chills. "Mitsuki!" he shouted, holding on to his friend's hand, but the blue haired boy had lost his grip. "No, no... stay with us!!" This was more like a scream, and the blond felt himself losing his grip. "Fight it, stay with us!!!" "Boruto..." Even through all the sounds of the machines and the ringing in his ear as a reminiscent of his yelling, Boruto heard his friend's voice, and his own heart skipped a beat. "I'm sorry..." Mitsuki's hand slipped from his grasp and fell onto the mattress, just as the blond watched in horror his chest stopped moving altogether. An ear-piercing cry filled the room, breaking harshly into the deafening silence. … Shikadai froze, face-to-face with the adults as he heard the sound, their expressions a reflection of what he was suddenly feeling inside - a large, terrifying hollow, as if his stomach had dropped a couple of feet, leaving his body behind. Without even realizing what he was doing, the boy turned behind, his horrified gaze landing upon two of his best friends… trying to reach Mitsuki… He… was supposed to do something, he went out of this room for a reason, he was sure of it… but suddenly… he couldn’t remember what that was at all… ... Naruto had realized something was wrong the moment he had seen the kids start to panic, so he was ready to go get Sakura and Tsunade when Shikadai opened the door and came face-to-face with them. What he wasn’t at all prepared for was, though… His blood froze in his veins as his head quickly turned towards the boy in his bed, watching both his son and Sarada screaming for their friend. 'No, no, no...! You have to fight it!' This and many other frantic thoughts raced through the Hokage's mind as he stared in disbelief at what was happening... "Naruto!" Kakashi’s sharp voice woke him from his shock as he remembered what he had to do. He ran as fast as he could towards Sakura's office. He didn't even knock, he just abruptly pushed the door open. "Sakura-chan, Granny Tsunade! You have to come now!" Just the way he entered the room and the pure horror on Naruto's face left no need for further explanation as Sakura and Tsunade both practically ran out of the room, a few of the nurses also on their heels. Tsunade reached for her com to announce code blue and the room number, and Sakura, hearing the shrill cry of the heart machine, upped her pace. ... The little, blue-haired child was completely alone in the darkness... Well, that wasn't really accurate. There were people around. People he... remembered somehow. All with their backs to him. And he was scared... For some reason, he was scared beyond belief. He opened his mouth to call for them, tried to reach forward... But it seemed like they were too far away... 'You are no longer wanted here...' a voice came, and following that, one of the people surrounding him started walking away. There were many words, many hurtful phrases ringing around the darkness, and one by one people left, as the child only watched in fear and helplessness... Getting smaller and smaller with each step taken away from him... 'Why won't anyone come to your help...?' A tall brunette with a blue scarf walked away, and tears now started to fall from the child's eyes. 'Outsider!' rang a chorus of voices, as a blond and black haired duo walked away laughing, hand in hand, not taking a glance back. Broken, Mitsuki tried to run after them... but fell. He turned to the last person... A tall, black haired man. 'Dad...?' came a very feeble, childish voice. 'Why don't you hurry up and die already...?' with that, the man was gone, too. Now but a toddler, Mitsuki pulled his knees to him, hugging them with his small arms, and cried, cried... After what felt like an eternity, a shadow fell over him. The toddler raised his head, wondering, hoping if anyone had come back for him... His eyes widened in fear as he saw a gruff man with spiky blond hair looming over, looking down at him with a merciless leer. Without a heed to the child's crying and whimpering, the man grabbed a fistful of Mitsuki's hair and raised him in the air, laughing loud and cold... ... The girl, Sasuke's daughter, got up on the bed, trying to revive his boy, the Sannin could see how endless tears rolled down her cheeks one by one, unstoppable, as her whole frame shook. The boy had completely frozen... 'Mommy...?' a young voice inside his head asked, an almost hysteric tone to it, and for the briefest of seconds the room disappeared as the man saw two familiar bodies in front of him... A black haired man and a brown haired woman... Lying side by side, apparently dead... Then a small figure with long, black hair approached them. 'Daddy...?' ... Boruto had completely frozen in time the moment his friend's hand slipped out of his own and fell with a silent thud against the mattress. Blue eyes widened in horror, mouth hung open, he even found it difficult to breathe. Sarada was in shock too, but she was quick to snap out of it. She had to do something! Anything! Practically climbing on the bed, the Uchiha put both her hands, one on the top of the other, against Mitsuki's chest and pumped it. "No, no, no, you're not gonna die on us, you idiot!" Tears were starting to fall from her ebony eyes but the girl just kept on pushing the chest. But Mitsuki's eyes remained closed and the machine kept its chilled sound around the room... it wasn't working! "Mitsuki, come on!" Sarada cried out, and even more tears rolled down her cheeks. She wasn’t going to give up on her friend, she couldn't! "Get your heart beating!" She tried to hold back her sobs, but it was no use. "Please don't leave us!..." Her frame shook with the harsh sobs that were almost tearing her lungs apart, but she kept on pumping. "Please..." she begged, trying to tune out that awful sound. ...At that moment, her mother and Tsunade came in running. "Get them out of here!" yelled Tsunade as she reached the bed and pushed Boruto out of the way as gently as she could. Sakura took her daughter in her arms and quickly set her back on the floor. The pink haired woman then moved swiftly to the dying boy and returned to do what her daughter had been doing all along. "Start keeping track of the time!" Boruto only came to his senses as he felt strong arms grabbing him. "No! NO!" he screamed, his eyes still on his friend. "LET ME GO, I NEED TO BE WITH HIM!!" he continued screaming, and actually tried to kick whoever was holding him as he was being taken out of the room. "MITSUKI!!!" he screamed at the top of his lungs, and started sobbing harshly. Then that someone scooped him up and he suddenly found himself snuggled into his father's chest. "Don't look..." Naruto whispered, his voice strained and grave. Boruto held onto his father's clothes as he started crying his heart out. He never realized Naruto was taking him out until he felt a cool wind ruffling his hair. Sarada tried to return to her friend's side but as soon as she did, a strong arm grabbed and scooped her up as well. She only realized she was being taken when she saw Mitsuki and her mother getting further and further away... But she didn't have any strength left... not even to scream the way Boruto had... … “Move away, boy,” Shikadai heard Lady Fifth’s urgent voice and felt her hands firmly moving him aside. Maybe he shouldn’t… but he just couldn’t help it as he immediately drifted back to the window of the room, watching the chaos inside, his friends getting forcefully taken away… He couldn’t move… All his muscles were locked in place as he looked on, shell-shocked… He had forgotten that they weren’t at all alone, at least not until he felt a familiar touch, a motherly but firm one… “Please don’t take me out too,” he whispered, his tone so listless that he wasn’t sure Ino heard him. Gently, Ino turned him away from the window and held him tightly to herself. “Don’t watch then…” “This… this can’t possibly be happening…” the boy kept murmuring numbly, not even realizing he was shaking like a leaf. “We… we are still children… there has to be some sort of rule setting kids apart from these situations, right…?” Ino didn’t say anything more, just held him closer. They would have to bring him back… right…? ... Not... all was lost, no he wouldn't believe that. Truthfully, he should have taken this in his own hands from the beginning instead of trusting Konoha. There was still Juugo... And even if that plan fails, he could always deliver his son's soul to another, healthy body, maybe even one of those children's bodies if it came to that point... 'I just want my parents back...!' the voice, his seven-year-old voice screamed in his head, tears in his voice... He was... crying...? 'Why did it have to be them?! Why do I have to be alone?! That's not fair!' ... "How many seconds?" Sakura asked, sweat dropping by the side of her cheek. "Fifteen," a nurse answered, quickly looking at her watch. 'Good Lord,’ Sakura thought, forcing her mind to stay clear. "Move your hands." she heard Tsunade call, and she used the time to focus her chakra in her hands. She watched as her mentor injected a small portion of adrenaline directly to the boy's heart. "Hekirekite no Jutsu!" She brought her hands back down on Mitsuki's chest, and the boy's body lifted slightly from the bed. ... The boy was crying, the pain was too much to bear... Why... why did he have to suffer so...? Shouldn't it be quicker if he just let go, and never looked back...? Suddenly, the man's cruel laughter stopped, and his hand released the toddler's hair. Before he could fall, though, he was caught, held gently and lovingly in a pair of warm arms. He dared to raise his head and look... The angel's light was pushing away all the darkness, all the hateful voices, trying to heal his heart... The pink haired angel smiled fondly at him, her arms tightening around him a little more, her expression so merciful and loving... 'It's okay, baby, it's going to be alright...' she mused, almost cooing. 'Don't be afraid... I'm here...' ... Sakura mentally cursed as the machine's sound didn't change. Seeing no changes with the first charge, Tsunade repeated the same move... She had to be careful, the boy’s heart was already so weak due to the burns... but they had to bring him back. "Come on..." Sakura whispered, not taking her eyes from the boy's face, counting as she continued with the compressions. "You can do it, Mitsuki, come on..." she let her chakra flow to his body once again, but the results were the same... ... Don’t be afraid...? How was he supposed to do that...? The little toddler could feel nothing but fear, even with the angel here... None of those people who he cared about was here... They... didn't... care about him... 'Why do you fight...?' a sinister voice rang in his ears, blocking the angel's. Squeezing his eyes shut, the toddler pushed away from her. He scrambled to his feet quickly and started running, deeper and deeper into the darkness... Then he stumbled onto something and fell forward, landing hard on the ground. Cruel laughter echoed all around the black void, and the toddler curled in on himself, sobbing. 'Outsider! Outsider! Outsider!' the chants echoed repeatedly while the boy kept crying, wishing this to all end... ... The minutes passed, excruciatingly slow but also painfully quick... and nothing. "...Sh... Shall I announce the time...?" The nurse couldn't finish the sentence, a sad look visible in her eyes. Sakura was distinctly aware that there was some sort of chaos going on inside or outside of the room, but her mind had automatically tuned out any sound other than the machine. "Wait... wait just a second..." she mumbled in response to the nurse. She still had her hands on the kid's chest, she couldn't give up... She had to act careful, but she knew just the tiniest amount of shock that might do the difference, and she would never forgive herself if she didn't give it all her best. "Sakura-san... It might be too much already..." The nurse warned her. "Let's just leave the child in peace..." another nurse said, her voice shaky. Tsunade snapped back to herself and hastily hushed the nurse, staring at Sakura. Sakura remained in silence as she kept looking at the heart machine, her chakra still flowing through Mitsuki's chest... 'Please… please come back...' Sakura thought... ... The toddler wasn't sure how long he stayed there, curled up in the fetus position, crying, hurting... He felt a warm presence approaching... felt someone putting their arms around him yet again, but he lacked the energy, the will to look up... He didn't know anymore... ... Outside, a leaf from a nearby tree fell from its place as the clouds dropped their first tears and wetted the ground, little by little...        

[salamanderskin]

Respite

Still on the CR kick with no sign of easing. Just a sick Fjord feeling sorry for himself and then feeling guilty about it. Caduceus gives him such much-needed softness.  Set during episode 92 no spoilers I think. Kind of a follow up to this because stifles give me life.

The mood in the group is strange when the Mighty Nein ride out from Zadash.

Fjord loves them all but his head aches just trying to keep track of the aims and worries and triumphs that bind their little group; he can read the tension rising from Beau like steam, Jester beside her with a combination of concern and bubbling joy at her new found father. Then there’s Caleb and Nott and Yasha and then there’s Caduceus. He feels like he needs a whole extra brain to think about Caduceus with and maybe a whole extra heart to hold the bond that has grown between them in the past few weeks. 

His head really does ache, though. His throat feels hot and dry, with a lancing pain when he swallows, and he can’t stop sniffling every five minutes. His mood darkens in sync with the clouds that thicken on the horizon.  He would give a lot to be safely back in the Xorhaus, meditating in the magical sunlight of Caduceus’s garden, rather than pounding across these monotonous grasslands on horseback. 

He feels small and selfish just thinking about it. They are in the midst of trying to stop a war and chasing resolution for dear friends trapped by years of trauma. One of their group was possessed until, like, last week, others have been or are about to be reintroduced to their respective abusers.  And Fjord has a cold. 

He still feels shitty, though. 

He is distracted from this minor complaint when the party finally find a place to stop. The gentle, grassy slopes offer no cover, but they could see anything coming a mile away. For example, they soon spot someone else’s campfire a little way away. Nott and Jester leap to investigate. He lets them go. If they need backup they’ll yell. Loudly. Let them do the legwork while he sits down. 

That leaves the other three to set a fire while Caleb conjures the tiny magical hut which is their home away from home. Fjord can’t seem to get warm. He inches closer to the fire until the smoke irritates his eyes and rubs at his arms with his palms to try to gather some heat. The itchiness in his nose has grown intense and distracting- he hovers a hand near his face to scrub at it but the irritation with neither leave nor crest into a relieving sneeze. His throat burns and he feels overall miserable. “Hey, are you ok? You look… I don’t know… you look frustrated.”

That’s one word for it. He doesn’t want Caduceus to worry, but he also knows the Firbolg can see right through him so he explains, “Remember how you said I might be getting sick?”

“Oh dear,” Caduceus’ mouth twists in sympathy.

“Nothing serious, I promise you. I’m just-” Fjord sniffles in demonstration, demonstrating how he can hardly breathe through his nose. He regrets it immediately when it makes him cough. 

“Can I come check you over?” Caduceus approaches, gaze soft and concerned. 

“There’s really no need, I’m sure it’s just a cold.”

Caduceus raises an eyebrow. “What if I want to be sure? I don’t want you to feel badly.” 

“Well then, I’ll humour you.” 

Fjord doesn’t expect the contact needed for the diagnosis to come in the form of a kiss to the forehead, but it’s very lovely. The magic feels like a little trickle of warmth, though perhaps that’s just the butterflies he always gets when they make contact. 

“Okay.” Caduceus says, drawing back. “I don’t think a healing spell will do much, but I’ll put something for the congestion in some tea, alright?”

“Sounds good. Thank you.”

The dark has truly drawn in now. The sky has clouded and there are no stars. A little wind ruffles the long grasses,  makes the campfire leap and the smoke veer from side to side so that there is no getting away from it. After their time in the city is strange to be somewhere so open. No buildings, no mountains, no break in the horizon. The sky arcs above them like a great upturned basin, thick with clotting clouds. 

It would be peaceful if it wasn’t for how the cold makes Fjord’s nose drip and his head ache. He feels thoroughly sorry for himself and then immediately feels childish for it. He has been getting soft from all the city living. He presses the sides of his nose again, trying to push into his sinuses and ease the dull pain there. 

Caduceus returns just as he is blowing his nose, passes a cup of tea to Caleb, then to Yasha then approaches with one for Fjord. “Here you are. Drink it while it’s hot.” 

The firbolg looks lovely in the firelight, Fjord thinks. The warmth touches his ashy gray to a warm dove-colour and when he turns his head, the clean lines of his cheeks and brow stand out like a statue of some forest god. Caduceus has added a knitted shawl over his shoulders but he doesn’t seem cold at all. Fjord envies him that. It must be the fur. He sees Caduceus turn to sit on a stump on the other side and quickly moves up to make space beside himself. 

“Want me to sit beside you?” Caduceus asks.

“Yes please.” Fjord says. He wants more, of course, so much more than that, but that is a good start. His friend’s body settles beside his  and he feels his mood lift even as he shivers. Their thighs press together and he leans in to the comforting warmth of the firbolg’s flank. Caduceus has some height on him, which makes it wonderfully easy to lean his head into his shoulder.

Before Fjord can protest, Caduceus removes his shawl from his shoulders and spreads it over both their laps. Fjord gives a little hum of thanks, lets his eyes drift closed in the sudden, soothing warmth of it. 

Fjord could probably fall asleep here. He almost does, if it wasn’t for how badly he needs to sneeze. He manages to cup his hands over his face, though he doesn’t need to, really; there isn’t any sound to it, just a ferocious bob of his head and a whole-body shudder. He scrunches his nose and clenches his eyes shut to try to fight the tickle, then flinches into another repressed “hh- mmkx!!!” He breathes out a “uuugh” of a groan at how stuffy he feels afterwards. 

“Was that a sneeze?” Caduceus turns to look at him with an expression he can’t quite read. 

“Y-up- hknt!” Fjord nods, forefinger jammed up under his nose, sneezes again. It makes his head throb. “--hhnxxt!”

“Oh! Bless you, then.” 

“Thadks.” His voice comes out thick and wrecked. “Guhh… ’scuse me.” 

It’s almost worth it for how Caduceus draws him closer and rubs his back. 

They are startled from the embrace by a shout and a blur of blue as Jester sprints toward them out of the dark and then away again, calling for Nott.

Fjord raises his head, peers out into the night and strains his ears for sounds of a struggle. Across the other side of the fire, the others are on equally high alert; Yasha drawn to her full height, Beau with her night-vision goggles, Caleb’s gaze gone vague as he sees through the eyes of his familiar.

“Do you think we should-?” Caduceus begins.

“They... seem to have a handle on the situation.” Caleb gives with a wry smile and everyone relaxes. If Caleb hasn’t launched himself protectively after the little goblin then they must be safe enough.

Fjord laughs too, as he wonders what shenanigans the two most chaotic members of the nein had got up to out there in the dark. It turns into a fit of coughing that blossoms in his throat and won’t stop until Yasha has passed him her water skin.

“Better not, think I’m coming down with something.” He manages with the scraps of breath he can grab. “I’ll risk it,” Yasha’s voice is steady and sweet as ever, so he drinks. It does help, and it helps even more when she reaches to give him a hug from one side.  “I hope you feel better soon, Fjord.” 

When Nott and Jester finally return it is with laughter on their lips and not a slip of regret for running into an enemy camp in the middle of the night.

 Once he might have rolled his eyes at their celebration of escaping trouble they could have easily avoided, then seethed with a gut full of worry that one day they might not come out clean, snapped at Nott and brushed off Jester’s affectionate advances. These days he feels calmer, more trusting, able to accept things as they come. Some of it is a gift from the Wildmother, the same deep faith which Caduceus glows with. Some of it is Caduceus himself. His very presence makes Fjord feel lighter. 

He watches the Firbolg lean over the fire, lit like a stained-glass window as he conjures a bowl of stew seemingly from nowhere. 

He sits beside the fire and listens to his teammates recount their chaotic adventures with a sense of calm in his belly and Caduceus’ shawl over his knees. He pinches his nose hard and groans, trying to stave off sneezes but now then a few still escape. 

He shudders into his fist, with no more sound than a “-hh'nkt” of suppressed force, 

They’re as quiet as he can make them, but Caleb’s head perks up all the same, brows canted in his familiar expression of mild concern. “Gesundheit.” 

“Looking a little green there, buddy.” Nott adds. 

“Oh no, Fjord, are you sick?” Jester’s head snaps round in interest.

“Just a sniffle.” He shrugs. He’s not the one who should be the centre of attention tonight. Beau and Nott are. 

Thank the Wildmother, Caduceus Clay’s deep, steady voice distracts them from making a scene, “He’s fine. Jester, tell me how you met those bandits before?” 

Once again Fjord admires Caduceus’ mild diplomacy. The light conversation is exactly what they need to keep their minds from the path ahead. Beau in particular has expressed she won’t be talking about her traumas to the group in general,while  Nott doesn’t seem to know what she wants right now. 

Fjord himself is deeply grateful because he has to sneeze again and this time it escapes him as an orcish “hhuhh--’TSSSHHHuu!” He groans and swears as he blows his nose afterwards. Caduceus’ arm is there for him to lean into when he shivers despite the fire. 

“I think you should go to bed,” Caduceus says softly. 

Luckily the rest of the Nein are of the same mind, so Caleb conjures the magical dome they use as a shelter. It’s warmish inside and warmer still when their bodies pile in next to each other. They take their familiar places; Yasha takes first watch, Beau and Jester are spooning while Nott curls at Caleb’s feet like a gnarly green cat. Fjord and Caduceus lie beside each other, as always. At some point on their travels, the foot of space between their sleeping bodies became an inch, became Fjord with his head pillowed Caduceus’ chest or their fingers intertwined. No one in the Mighty Nein has even teased them about it. Yet. That is a blessing Fjord will enjoy for as long as he can. 

It’s almost pitch-black inside the hut. Fjord can hear the others of the Nein breathing and shifting in their close proximity. He wants to sleep but his head feels stuffed and thick. Breathing through his mouth is making his throat dry but he can’t get enough air any other way. In frustration he pinches and knuckles at his nose, wiggling it in hope of easing the deep-seated itch. It doesn’t help.

Instead he feels his breath coming in shallow pants, makes an involuntary “ghhh” of a groan at how congested he feels. He manages to sneeze into his fist without more than a shudder of his head but then there’s another and another in a slow, exhausting fit with plenty of time for miserable sniffles in between. 

He is hovering between one “ hh'nkt” and the next when he feels a tender arm on his shoulder as Caduceus scoots up closer to him. He rolls over obligingly until his head is cradled against the firbolg’s shoulder. In a moment their blankets are settled over both of them, welcoming him into a pool of shared body heat that makes him sigh in satisfaction.

It’s still recent enough to be novel, this sleeping together, still sends a flutter of joy through him that Caduceus is his now. They haven’t talked about what it means exactly, but he’s so glad of it, especially when he feels like this.

The moment is interrupted by a stinging itch in his nose and all he can do is buck his head and stifle a sneeze into Caduceus’ chest. His partner doesn’t flinch, just holds him tighter and lets it happen. “Bless you sweetheart. Are you done?”

He nods, then shakes his head and desperately crushes his nose into his fist for a hard double “--mmkx!--’nkt!”--- Repressing it makes his head spin. He relaxes again with a heavy sigh and turns to wipe his nose. He’s too congested for it to be messy, thank goodness. It feels like all the gunk is just stuck up in his head. At least he’s not noisy enough to wake the others. 

“Poor thing. Feeling worse?” Caduceus notices. His bass voice is so low it is barely a rumble in his chest. Fjord thinks he feels the vibration rather than hears it. 

“...yeah…” He admits. 

“Such bad timing…” Caduceus sighs softly. “If we were back in the house, I have a very good soup recipe for this kind of thing.  The hot tub would be good for you too. I could take care of you a little.” 

Fjord snuffles thickly and sighs. That does sound good. 

“Will you two SHUT UP!?” 

That sounds less good. That would be Beauregard.

She has reason to be tense, which is why Fjord merely grunts “Sorry!” instead of snapping back. Her complaint is backed up by some light grumbling from Nott and by Caleb clearing his throat in a way that makes it clear he is also awake. Despite the safety of their position, it seems nobody is sleeping well tonight.

Fjord may as well try, though. He’s going to be groggy enough in the morning as it is and he wants a clear head for the confrontation with Beau’s family. Well, a metaphorical one at least. 

He rolls over and closes his eyes, trying to will his mind away from his burning throat and the compulsive deserve to keep swallowing against it. He tries to reach for the place Caduceus has shown him in meditation; a lulled state where his body of least possible concern. It’s hard without his breathing as a reliable guide but he is beginning to manage it when he feels Caduceus tuck into the space behind him. A seven-foot tall firbolg makes a luxurious big spoon. It makes Fjord huff a laugh, which makes him cough. 

Caduceus cuddles against him, bringing blessed warmth along with comfort. Long arms reach around to smooth his hair and linger on his forehead, rubbing right at the root of Fjord’s headache without even having to ask. It feels really good.

In the darkness of the dome he hears the heavier breathing that means Beauregard has fallen asleep. Jester turns over and makes an undeniably cute sound. Beneath Caduceus’ loving touch he feels the fatigue wash over him, pulling him down into sleep.

From the very cusp of consciousness, he senses Caleb rise and tiptoe to sit at the doorway beside Yasha, but feels no tug of concern. Let the two light sleepers keep each other company. He has everything he needs right here. 

Fjord falls asleep to the sound of a gentle rain beginning to fall. He doesn’t dream of angry Gods. He doesn’t dream of anything at all. 

[longingfreesia]

bury it in mine | ao3 mirror

raven and ciel try to set up a nice date, and end up with a bit more than they expected. wc 4291

note: i just think these two being happy and in love and learning to heal together is neat.

Ciel is washing up, and says, “I have a date tonight.”

Lu rolls her eyes. “Why are you telling me?”

Ciel takes her plate from in front of her (it’s already practically clean with how she eats) and smiles. “Because, I don’t want you trying to communicate with me and hearing us.”

“Why would I care?” She says, pouting.

“Well, I guess you wouldn’t. I guess you would just love to hear me talking to my sweetums.” He puts a sickening emphasis on the last word and Lu sticks her finger in her mouth, gagging exaggeratedly.

“You’re gross.”

“What, you don’t wanna see me and my darling peaches? My pumpkin sweetie pie? My little cuddle muffinー“

“Uuugh, okay, okay, stop it!” Lu whines, shaking her head with her hands over her ears. “I won’t snoop!” Ciel chuckles as he sorts the dishes into their place in the cabinets. Lu knows he’s won this round, and blows a raspberry at him as he pulls his chair out from their table.

...

Several hours pass. Ciel is more anxious than usual.

“That must be the third time you've checked the kitchen. What's got you so worked up?” Lu asks, boredom hanging on her words.

“It's a very special night! I have to make sure everything is perfect!” Ciel replies, stopping only for a moment to do so.

Lu scoffs. “Of course it's going to be perfect. You're the host, after all.”

Ciel stops once again to lean back into the doorframe and go ‘aaawwww, luuuu…’ in a way that makes her pout and him grin.

“You're a good kid, y'know?”

“Yeah, I would be if I were actually a kid.”

Ciel smiles, and slides into his spot at the table. “Maybe you're right. I shouldn't worry so much…”

“Duh! He gets all doofy whenever he's around you, he'll definitely be happy.”

Ciel turns to look at her, almost dumbfounded and it clearly evident on his face, and she feels smug. Tonight should be fun.

...

Ciel jumps up when Lu loudly announces she can tell Raven is outside.

“You're acting like a teenager.”

Ciel shushes her. She crosses her arms and he gives up.

He opens the door, and gasps softly.

“Ah, is it bad?” Raven asks. “I'm… not good with formal wear, so I didn't…”

“No, no, it's fine! More than fine! You look stunning.” Lu rolls her eyes behind him. Her butler was so easy to impress when it came to men. Raven had big muscles! So what!

Raven looks down sheepishly, and Ciel nearly melts. He's so cute. “...Thank you.”

“Oh! Come in. I've got something going already, but Lu isーLu!”

“What!”

Ciels voice is hushed but frantic as he rushes over to her. “You said you'd goー”

“And I will. After I get whatever you're making.”

Ciel groans. Lu has donned a smug face she hasn't in a while, and he knows this is payback. “Fine. Just behave.”

Lu smirks, and Raven chuckles. Ciel startles, having momentarily forgotten he came in. “You two get along well.”

Lu sticks her tongue out at him. This is going well.

“I need to go check on the foodーI'll be back as soon as possible, okay?” Ciel says. Both of them nod, and he leaves for the kitchen.

Lu immediately stares Raven down with an intensity he didn't know eleven-year-olds could have.

“Go ahead, sit.” She says, but it feels almost like a threat. He does as she says anyway.

“Have… I done something wrong?” He asks.

“No. The opposite… so far.” She says, kicking her legs back and forth under the table. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“About?”

“Ciel, what else?”

“Oh… of course.”

Lu ‘hmph’s and crosses her arms. “Listen to me well when I say this,” she starts, attempting to take on the regal voice she did so long ago, “Ciel is my royal butler. If you hurt him in any way shape or form, I'll have no choice but to get rid of you for good.” She narrows her eyes at him. “Got it?” She adds, punctuating it with a stomp of her foot. Raven blinks.

“Y… yes ma'am.”

“Good!” She exclaims. Then, after a moment of silence, “He cares an awful lot about you. I've only seen him get that look in his eyes about… someone… else important to him. He'll... tell you that on his own time, I think. But, the point is… you must be reaaal special for him to think of you like that. So just don't screw it up, okay? I can't have my butler with a broken heart.” Her tone is somewhat playful, but her face betrays her genuinity.

Raven isn't sure what to say, but for “Of course. I'd never dream of it.” That was the answer, yes, but the rest of what she saidーreally? Ciel thought that highly of him? It was… It was…

Lu scrutinizes him under her gaze a moment longer, then beams. “I'm gonna go to bed.”

“Hm? I thought you wanted the dinner Ciel is making.”

“That? Well… Maybe, but he asked me not to snoop. I'm a woman of my word, you know. I just needed to make sure you knew your place.” She smirks. “Hey, pinky promise?”

“Pi…” His confused expression shifts to a gentle smile. She really was a kid, wasn’t she? “Sure.”

Lu hooks their pinkies together and shakes his arm as hard as her little arm can, then skips off somewhere up a short flight of stairs.

Raven finds himself uneasy, for some reason.

One, he figures, likely being Lus near-threatening, another being… simply not knowing what to do in someone else home. He felt unwelcome, despite being invited here. Was it alright for him to be here, after all? Yes, surely…

A faint sound catches his ear, and his eyes go wide when he realizes what it is. Ciel… is singing, as he cooks. Not loudly, just a low, gentle hum over the sound of a low fire. It's… rather soothing, actually, and he feels his anxieties melt. He wonders, briefly, if this is something Lu gets to hear often.

He also wonders if perhaps Ciel would do that for him, sometime. It's a thought that makes him feel the need to shake his head as if to dispel it. But… it’s so nice, and something so elegant, in contrast to him… (could he ever sing, himself? no, that was silly.) It warms his heart, a bit, and he saves it in his mind.

Ciel soon after pops his head through the doorway, informing him that he'll be bringing something out in a moment in a singsong manner.

When he does finally come out, he's carrying platters of elaborate dishes Raven can barely (or plain doesn't) recognize. He feels like he's stolen something, somehow, or that he's lost.

The plates clink on the table. “I can eat this?”

Ciel snorts. “Yes, silly. I made this for you.” He pauses. “I hope it's alright, I'm used to making sweets, since that's what Lu likes, but… I think you like meat more, not the type for cake, so I tried that…” He practically speaks to himself instead of Raven with how he babbles. He appears to be so wrapped up in the food that he hasn't even noticed that Lu left.

Raven clears his throat. “I don't think I've ever even seen food this elaborate. Thank you.”

Ciel beams. His ears light up in a way that's very charming, and he practically glows with pride. “I'm glad!”

Raven… still feels somewhat like he isn't allowed to eat what's in front of him, but… (ah, where did he find steak that big…?) Just this once.

He would have to ask Ciel to teach him how to cook, soon.

...

He realizes, now, that perhaps he doesn't feed himself properly, and that he is very, very sleepy.

“Oh, are you alright? Maybe I went overboard…”

Raven simply shakes his head. He wouldn't want Ciel to stress over it. It wasn't bad, anyway, just new.

“Hm… do you want to go to bed?” He swallows, shortly, “I'd hate to send you home so quickly. You could stay here for the night?” He can feel his heart beating faster, nervous, but he was never one to let that show. Besides, he felt confident in this.

Raven blinks. “That's alright with you?”

“Why would I offer if it wasn't?”

“Fair point. Then where?”

Ciel suddenly straightens. “Ah... “

“What?”

“We don't have a guest room… Would you mind staying in mine?”

Ravens immediate thought is ‘no, of course not,’ as it was nothing to himーhe had spent nights packed into cots with his peers before, that would be nothing, except…

Except, Ciel was… different. He was, (he felt his stomach stir oddly at the words) in love with him. It was different.

He shakes his head, in any case. “That's fine, as long as you're alright with it.”

Ciel nods, and holds his hand out for Raven to take it. Raven almost misses it, confused at first at the unfamiliar gesture. He reprimands himself right after for being so strange.

Ciels bed is lit through a window by early moonlight. It's pleasant, making the room more comforting than it already looked. And… a few soft plushies lay on the sides of the bed. Lus? (speaking of, where did lu run off to? she can't have gone somewhere far, right? but he doesn't pry.)

“Hmm… you can borrow something of mine if you want something more comfortable to sleep in.” Ciel shrugs towards one of two doors next to each other. “The closet’s there if you wanna take a shot to see if it fits.”

Raven nods, except he shuffles awkwardly through what he can find and grabbing a pair of sweatpants. They’re loose enough that it doesn’t matter if they fit or not, and he doesn’t plan on wearing a shirt anyway. Ciel nods him towards the other door when he walks out, but when he exits again, he stares.

“What’s wrong?” Raven asks.

“Huh? Oh, nothing. Nothing at all, honestly. You just… always look good.” He laughs, breathy and short. Raven suddenly feels embarrassed. Did he always look at him like that? Not that he minded, so much, but… the concept of being attractive to someone was foreign and long-forgotten. And… mostly just embarrassing.

Ciel repeats the same thing Raven did, and comes out in an oversized shirt with… a large print of a very round cat in the middle? That was… cute…  He shuffles into the bed wordlessly, with the ease of a motion he’s taken countless times. Except, it was with someone else this time, wasn't it?

Raven finds that he's stayed silently by the door for a rather long time now when Ciel turns to look at him, concerned.

“Do you not want to get in? It's fine if that's the case.”

“No, I…” Raven starts, but doesn't know where he's going. He worries his lip instead.

“...Mmm.” Ciel gets out of the bed and walks to him, taking his hand. “It's alright. Come on.” He says, pulling lightly on his hand. Raven follows the lead, and comes to sit on the edge of the bed with him.

He thinks he should at least turn away for this, or something, so he does. A ritual he knows by heart and muscle memory, a seal popping open, and a very strange feeling later, he hefts his Nasod arm to the floor and props it up. He’d have to quickly get it back on in the morning, but… it’d cause more trouble than convenience if he didn’t.

Ciel is staring, again. He quickly catches himself, but not before Raven notices.

“...Sorry.”

“Everyone does. It's fine.”

He shifts under the sheets with Ciel, and suddenly feels very wrong. He doesn't deserve this, does he? He most certainly doesn't, not like this. He’ll hurt Ciel if he gets any closer, so he should stay on the opposite side, and…

and Ciel pulls him by the waist into his arms.

“That's better,” he mutters sleepily, and rubs circles into Ravens back.

It's… good. Ciels embrace is calming, and feels more like home than anything Raven’s felt in… who knows how long.

But still… still, the feeling of being undeserving persisted. Ciel must have been able to feel how he remained stiff and anxious, because he kisses Ravens forehead.

“Hey,” he says, guiding Ravens hand to his own hip. “I want to be here with you. ...You won’t hurt me, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Raven breathes deeply before looking Ciel in the eyes. “Do you promise?”

He smiles, almost laughing. “I promise.

In fact…” He trails off, leaning closer to Raven, almost directly on him. “I want you to kiss me.”

Raven at least knows enough to know it'd be awkward to say anything, and obliges. Ciel is warm, and it spreads to himーwarm, soft and encompassing, something Raven welcomes with open arms, lets cover him whole. It feels safe, with himーsomething he rarely feels anymore.

Perhaps it's alright, thenーjust this once, to allow himself to let his guard down, to be happy without consequence.

Maybe… just this once. Maybe (he hopes, somewhere deep in his heart he can't yet see,) much more in the future.

...

There's something warm, something wet, something too bright covering his arms to the biceps. He doesn't get time to process it before he's lifted and shoved by the collar towards a tank, barely harboring a glance at the floor before being submerged. Bodies, bodies smothering it, smothering himーhe can't breathe. Every gasp is filled with burning liquid, every frantic scrape he takes at the glass is meaningless. He can't move his limbs, anything, everything is numbing. He can't let this happen, not again not again notー

He wakes and the ceiling is too far away. He moves his left arm first, remembers where he is, then tries his right, and remembers there’s nothing. He finds a warm hand almost immediately after scrambling in front of him again with his left, and gasps.

Ah, Ciel… Right, he's with Ciel… They fell asleep together, something that hadn't happened before.

He takes a deep breath and makes a decision.

“I'm sorry, Ciel,” Raven mutters before making to get out of the bed. Ciel stirs when he gets up, and he curses under his breath. He freezes, holding his breath and waiting until Ciel settles again before leaving.

...

The night air feels like stepping through a certain, into something new and refreshing. He breathes in deeply, trying to collect himself. He shoves his hand down the pocket of his sweatpants (ciels, rather), wondering if anyone would cause a fuss over a scary-looking man with one arm wandering around at night.

That was what people called him, wasn't it? Scary. He shakes his head. He knows he didn't give that feeling before he was captured. He figures it's a combination of the Nasod arm and all his scars. And… his demeanor. He tries to be nicer, he really does… He sighs. There's nothing to be done about it, really, is there? He's tried for years, to no avail. Perhaps he's damaged in more ways than his arm.

He kicks a loose chip of the sidewalk. It was a bit cold… It was the middle of the night, after all, and he'd only bothered to pull on his shoes so he could walk before heading out. It didn't matter, in any case. He would live. Nonetheless, he shivers and rubs his shoulder. He knew this part of Ruben well enough to know that… soon enough, a small river would come into view. He quickly gets to it, just as he thought.

He's come here before, on a few occasions like this. He finds water calming, for whatever reason. He settles by the shore, staring out at the surface of the water, rippling gently with the cool night winds. He attempts to settle his breathing, tune it with an imaginary flow of the waves. Ciel didn't need to see him like this. This way, he could deal with things on his own, and no one would be burdened with his issues.

The water is tranquil, and the aura of it seeps through his chest, until he finds the maelstrom in his chest has calmed. Running away like thisーit wasn't something he did before, either. But this was good, he knew it wasーit was the best possible solution that he could access to his troubles. At the very least, it was certainly better than… less than savory methods he'd used to cope in the past.

He stays like this for a long while, contemplating more than he likely should, in a state like this. He's only broken out of it when he hears frantic footsteps.

Shit, shit, shit, who is that? If it was just a passerby, he'd be fine, but if it wasn'tーshit, he hadn't brought a weapon, and his balance was thrown off (if just slightly) with no prosthetic.

“Raven? Are you there?” A familiar voice calls, and Ravens heart twists.

“...How did you find me?” He asks, perhaps too quietly.

Ciel rubs the back of his neck as he keeps walking to Raven. “I don't know that myself. I ran around for, ah, who knows how long until now.” He near collapses next to Raven when he gets to him. Raven feels his heart twinge with guilt. Had he been looking for him the whole time he'd been out…?

“...I’m sorry.” Raven mutters. Ciel laughs, out of breath.

“You should be!” then, after a moment, “I'm kidding. Very much so. You scared me half to death, though…” Ciel hangs his arms on his knees, breathing heavy. “So, any reason why you absconded into the night like that? I'm just that bad of a host?” He tries to keep his tone light, but concern shines through.

“It's… nothing, really.”

“Running off at four o’clock in the morning is kind of a little more than nothing.”

Raven runs a hand over his face, keeps it in his hair and stares at the stars. “It's nothing for you to worry about, at least.”

Ciel watches him as his head falls. “Raven?”

“Mm?”

“If…” He leans over to take Ravens hand in his own, ever-so-softly, and Raven turns to look at him in surprise. “If we're, really, seriously doing this, it's absolutely something for me to worry about.”

Raven feels his heart swell through the genuine words and Ciels gaze. “I… Sorry. I'm sorry. I didn’t mean to… ruin the night you set up.”

“Shhh, don't be, you didn’t,” Ciel says, kissing Ravens knuckles. “Just let me know what's wrong.”

“You could tell that much?”

Ciel scoffs. “Is running away something you do when you're happy?”

Raven rolls his eyes. “Alright, I get it. It… was a nightmare, is all.”

“‘Is all.’”

“What?”

“That’s really all?”

Raven fidgets anxiously. He squeezes Ciels hand, not meeting his gaze, “No… It's not.”

“...Is it something I can know?”

Raven once again looks surprised. “What do you mean?”

“I mean…” His face grows more solemn. “Things appear in my nightmares that… are very, very personal. If that's not something you're ready to share with me, it's okay. If you are, though... “ He brings Ravens hand to his chest. “I'm here to listen to anything you tell me.”

Raven clenches, unclenches his hand, stares at the ground between his feet. After a long moment, “I’ve told you how I got my Nasod arm, haven’t I?”

Ciel nods. “A little. I know you were experimented on, not much else.”

Ravens face is scrunched up something fierce, and he scowls at himself. “I… had a fiance. Comrades. They… were all killed, when I was kidnapped, and someone I had trusted aided in their murder.” He tries not to pay attention to the way Ciels face goes soft and heartbroken. “That’s… all I need to say, I think. You can likely imagine what the nightmares are about, now.”

“Ah…Iー”

“Don’t tell me you’re sorry for me. I don’t need it.”

“I wasn’t going to.”

“Then what?” If you’re not going to offer me your pity like everyone else, then what?

“I lost someone very important to me, too.” Ciel mutters, leaning against Ravens arm now.

“Hm?”

“He was… like a father to me. He took me in after my family was killed. I had a little sister, too.” Raven chances a look at Ciels face. He’s staring out at the water, head leaning on Ravens shoulder.

He has a smile on his face, but he’s not looking at the water, is he?

“He died, then?”

“Mm. What do you think? Killed, rather.” He gives a soft laugh. “He wanted me never to be like himーnever to be a hitman like himーeven made me promise not to hurt people.” He closes his eyes. “When I found out he was killed… I was just a kid, but I killed the people who hunted him down. With my past, nowーso much for that promise, I guess…”

Ciel hums and wraps his arm around Ravens, getting somehow even closer to him. “That’s my sob story. If I’m going to trust you, might as well get it all out.”

Raven lets them stay quiet for a moment, wrapped up in each others presence.

“Thank you… for telling me.”

Ciel shrugs. “I just want you to know that, you’re not alone in that pain, I suppose.” Then, after a moment, “Just because I spilled all that out doesn’t mean you have to. It’s okay if you don’t want to say anymore than you already have.”

Raven squeezes Ciels hand. “...Maybe… Maybe another time.”

“That’s fine.”

They watch the water together in silence. Raven tries to process everything that’s been said. The water is achy and the air feels thin with the scent of fresh grass. It’s familiar and not.

“Hey… Why’d you run off? You could’ve talked to me…” Ciel asks, lifting his head up to look at Raven.

“Ah, er. I didn’t want to burden you. I didn’t think you’d wake up…”

Ciel shakes his head. “The bed was all cold and empty after you left. I guess it was enough to disturb my sleep.” He pauses, then adds, “I’m glad it did. I don’t want you to be alone like that…”

“It’s not an issue. I’ve done it for years. Getting out, away from things, it helps me. It clears my mind, and doing it alone makes sure it doesn’t bother anyone.” Raven says as if it’s the plainest thing in the world.

“Mmm… Maybe so, but… I love you, you know. It wouldn’t bother me.” Ciel says, soft, almost a whisper.

‘I love you, you know.’ ‘I love you.’ ‘I love you.’ His tone so gentle, so genuine, repeating itself in Ravens mind, knowing it was directed at him, that it was meant wholly and truly…

Raven asks, pensively, “May I kiss you?” and Ciel dons a sleepy smile, nodding.

So he does, and it is safe, and it is comfortable, and he is most certainly home.

Ciel says, “I’m very glad I met you,” and nuzzles into Ravens neck, and Raven melts.

“And I you.” Raven pulls Ciel closer to him, arm around his waist.

“I want… I want to be there for you, like you have been for me,” Raven mumbles into Ciels hair. “I am not… particularly… good with emotions, mine or others. But, I… you deserve the same compassion you’ve given to me.” He seems to stumble over his words, as if finding a rocky path through a river.

Ciel smiles. “Aww, you’re a sweetheart.” Raven looks almost shocked, and he laughs. “But, really… It’s enough just to be with you.” He tips his head up towards Raven. “It’s wonderful. I couldn’t ask for anything more.”

‘I don’t deserve you,’ flits through Ravens mind. ‘I don’t deserve such love, such care,’ he almost says it, the words dyeing his lips and then seeping in. He decides against it. Ciel shivers out loud and Raven pulls him closer.

“I’m… sorry for making you come out here in the middle of the night. We should get back inside, you’ll get sick.”

Ciel laughs at him. “I’m not that fragile, you know. But… yeah, I would like to get back in the warm house.” He shifts up to kiss Ravens cheek, and he almost doesn’t register Ciels next words from surprise. “Mm, but you’re so warm. Like a heater.”

“Let's go home,” says Raven, softer than anything else he's said tonight, and half-carries Ciel back to his bed.

The night is still cold, but Raven feels a warm fireplace in his chest that outmatches all of it.

...

By the time they get home, Ciel has shifted from walking beside Raven, holding his hand, to being near-asleep leaning against his side, with Raven having to nudge him alert every now and then.

He attempts to get in the doors as quietly as possible, and without disturbing the man half-asleep on his shoulder. He briefly forgets where the bedroom is, but he eventually finds it and nudges the door open with his foot and helps him into bed, where he goes still almost immediately.

It was… calming, somewhat, to watch him fall into sleep so easily. Knowing he could keep Ciel safe, and he could be that comfortable around him… It was good. Perhaps… he was capable of loving him as he deserved, perhaps he was capable of more than hurt.

He slips into the bed after him, and this time, lets himself lay close to Ciel, soaking up his warmth like a cat on a windowsill.

Maybe… Just maybe, he was allowed this happiness.