#his one liners😘👌

[madeleinefunn]

robert sudgen would be THRIVING in the sassy man apocalypse rn

[unabashedly-so]

😉 SDV Elliot HC 😘

Flirting.

Content warning: does get a little naughty post 10 hearts, still SFW.

everyone's entitled to their opinion, even if they're wrong, and since i can't be wrong in my own hc post

📣 Elliott is the biggest flirt of all the bachelors.

...and bachelorettes, I feel confident in that too.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and say in the whole valley maybe.

you don't see it much in his actual in-game dialogue, but tbf you don't see much of it in anyone's dialogue. The game's not really written like that.

BUT IF IT WAS!!!!! ☝️

I'd hang my hat on this. Elliott's flirt game would be 🔥✨🔥😩😩👌👌👌

he's self-assured, he's foppish and aware of it, and heck SOMEBODY's gotta hear all the GREAT one-liners and colloquialisms he's got bouncing around in his head all day from writing.

once he gets to know someone (mainly knows that they're okay with playful, meaningless flirting), he's just shameless.

he's complimentary: "that shirt really brings out your beautiful [color] eyes!"

he's self-aggrandizing: "did you miss me already?" (<--narrator voice: it's been <10 minutes).

he uses pet names and terms of affection so much you almost think he's forgotten your name but it's too late to ask now. "dear," "darling," "love," "light of my life," "sunshine," "lovely," "beautiful," etc.

he's also self-deprecating, or the damsel in distress, "oh, if only there was someone strong and dashing who could save me from my misery!" (author's note: his misery is an unopened wine bottle.)

✨ D R A M A T I C . ✨ calm down, sir. (read: don't.)

then the praise. oh the praise. "bless you, you kind and radiant soul. My world would be so dark but for your captivating light."

he's probably not one to use a lot of physical touch in his flirtations because, y'know, boundaries. But with a receptive 4-7 heart farmer, he might make some exceptions, particularly if it was farmer-led, and so long as it wasn't genuinely romantic or sexual. Like dancing, brief hand-holding, kisses on the hand, hugs of most kinds, etc.

and if there was something he wasn't comfortable with, he'd first deflect playfully. ie, holding hands for too long, "I haven't gotten my cooties booster this year."

he'd only use pick up lines if he came up with them himself. a man has to have standards, y'know.

so, he'd basically be like this with ANYONE with whom he has a decent enough relationship with (and he knows it wouldn't make them uncomfortable)

But. BUT.

Here's where it gets really interesting. Follow me down......

after a farmer gets his 8 heart scene... he shuts it down.

he stops flirting with them. cold turkey.

for those of you who think graphically like i do, see below for a representation:

so what the heck is going on between 8 and 10 hearts???? why does it actually get WORSE than before he barely knew the farmer????????

aliensfeelings.png

he's not thinking much about any kind of relationship beyond friendship (with anyone, really) while he's working on his novel because he's So Close and that's really invigorating and it kind of overshadows all else.

then the book reading happens, and he hears himself say out loud that he dedicated his novel--his ENTIRE BOOK, arguably his LIFE'S WORK up to this point so far--to the farmer that he only just met a few seasons ago

(not to mention he canonically made it at their behest?!??? (2 heart scene picking the genre))

most authors dedicate first books to, like, their spouse or parents, or childhood best friend, sibling--someone MEANINGFUL, who has STAYING POWER, and has impacted the trajectory of their LIFE..........

🎵oh no.

🎵oh no.

🎵oh no no no no no.

talk about a fucking tidal wave of realizations that come crashing down on him. Things that he was too swept up in his own head to really realize or fully acknowledge. Like how, oh no, he's actually been putting some heat (and hope) behind his recent flirty interactions with the farmer. y'know, a more sophisticated of "hahaha... unless.....? 👀" Or how, oh no, did their lips always look so kissable? Or, oh no, was that story arc in his novel just an allegory for his subconscious pining? Oh, you mean the one he just READ OUT LOUD to the entIRE TOWN?????

the man's about to go jump into the sea with cement shoes.

and here's the thing: he's very SELF-assured. His confidence comes from knowing his own worth separate of extrinsic factors. But his confidence when it comes to relationships with other people??? Far less assured. He knows he can be intense in some ways, and not everybody wants that all the time. That stung, having to figure that out the hard way. And now it turns out all the sweet nothings he'd been saying to the farmer are actually emphatically true, but now how's the farmer to know that he's being serious when he says them??? And wouldn't it be so weird to say them with the fervor and hope of it being received genuinely while also having to acknowledge he'd said all those things ingenuously before, but he means them fr now??!?

he's too passionate about his adorée to want them to feel that he was being facetious with them, but was he not???

Oh, Elliott...

Despair(TM)-2

so he stops all flirting with the farmer. He doesn't ice them out, he just... acts a little differently. Where once he might have greeted them with a melodramatic tale of how he missed them so... instead he says, "It's wonderful to see you again."

it's almost like he treats them warmly, but professionally. The friendliness, warmth, sincerity is all still there but the jokes have faded away and he's a little more... stilted. It's about as subtle as he can be (ymmv), but the change is definitely... perceptible.

it's even worse when you take into consideration the bouquet, omfg. it DOES grant him a sense of security, but this is man is a ROMANTIC who is INTENSELY PASSIONATE. He's got a foot in the door, but doesn't want to scare them away by suddenly becoming overbearing. 8-10hearts is a bit of a tightrope walk for him, as he navigates getting closer to the farmer and being aware that not everyone can (or wants to) handle all he has to give (which is fine!).

he tries to give little tastes here and there but..... subtlety is not his strong suit, and he knows it.

and maybe the farmer has to confront him about it at some point, ymmv. it could very much be a "it's not you, it's me" conversation that leads to ???? or in this hc post, it leads to the 10heart event, where Elliott knows he has to let go of his fears and commit.

Despair(TM)-2_final_FINAL

It's just so hard because apparently this farmer really, really means a lot to him.

whoops how'd that happen *sweeps mountain of duck feathers and pomegranates under the rug*

without getting into the 10heart scene too much, I'd just also like to point out how fucking funny it is because you KNOW this romantic ass man has day dreamed so many different scenarios of expressing his love and adoration and when the moment finally arrives he just... totally flops. poetic.

but anyway once that's all established and good, the flirting comes back with a vengeance.

a saucy, naughty, 🌶️spicy🌶️ vengeance.

now that he's figured out where the new boundaries are, he's unafraid to use any opportunity (within reason) to express his adoration for them and reaffirm his commitment to them.

example, farmer teases him over a glass of wine, "wine on your tongue got you slurring, El?" To which he smirks, and lets out a low hum. "It's the wine now and you later, my love."

sometimes it's stupid, like stage whispering to Leah as you join them at the Saloon, "don't look now, but a ten just walked in. Should I talk to them? Do you think I have a chance?" (you're married, btw.) Leah's heard this before and says, "No."

sometimes if you're holding hands, he'll just start spontaneously pull you into a wrap in and dance with you, murmuring some lines of spicy poetry he writes and shares only with you. Sometimes this happens at home or on the farm, but not always.

but one way he NEVER flirts with you again is with anything that would put his adoration of you into question for even a moment. You may as well hang the moon and stars for him, and he'll never once let you forget or doubt that. 💖

sometimes it's just so infuriatingly cocky. "I hope you'll still love me when I'm so old and senile that I forget my own name."

"Of course I will."

"You make me so happy, dear. I just hope I can maintain the stamina needed to properly ravish it out of you."