#his name is pirate pete

[bookshelfdreams]

That is certainly - a statement.

What about Jim, who both metaphorically and literally discovers a path for themself beyond what they were raised to be? What about Pete, who learns to overcome his toxic masculinity, his posturing and self-importance? What about Ed, whose entire story is about deconstructing the performance that is expected of him?

What about, oh, idk, our main fucking character Stede Bonnet, whose arc starts with him literally breaking out from the hetero marriage he was forced into despite never fitting in? Who tries (and initially fails) to build a community where he can be himself? Whose entire story is about discovering his own queerness! He starts out not even able to put a finger on WHY his marriage made him feel so suffocated, and then journeys through s1 until he reaches the emotional climax - "His name is Ed"!

Contrast that with Izzy, who has to be dragged into a supportive community kicking and screaming. Who rejects care and compassion, even at his worst, who has to be forced to accept help. He receives the leg and calls the crew a homophobic slur for it, ffs. Only after that, only when people refuse to let him push them away, is he able to poke his nose into something approaching positive human connections. And that's a powerful narrative, sure, in it's own way; but it's hardly the Ultimate Queer Experience, and it's definitely not the "only queer arc".

And Izzy never lets go of the old ways. He never abandons the Blackbeard-era pirate lifestyle for something more positive, not fully. And that's okay, because ultimately, his arc isn't even about himself.

It's about Ed.

Ed keeps repeating toxic relationship patterns, and Izzy is a part of that. He's linked (on purpose, and I wish it had been done more explicitly) to Ed's father; because Izzy represents the poison that was instilled in Ed from a young age, and that has become so entrenched in his system that he can't imagine a life without it. He keeps Izzy around despite being hurt by him because Izzy is predictable, and in that, is safe, even though he hurts Ed; at least it's a hurt Ed is familiar with and can rely on.

When Izzy slowly changes it's to show that Ed is growing beyond the little voice in his head telling him to reject softness, that he can never be loved, that We're just not these kinds of people. If Izzy can evolve from someone spitting boyfriend at Ed like it's a slur to someone congratulating him on getting laid by that same person, Ed can overcome his inner demons telling him the same thing.

That's the point of Izzy's arc. And this is why he has to die, because Ed can never be truly free as long as Izzy is around. So Izzy goes, quietly, peacefully, and releases Ed of the poison; apologizes to him, tells him I was so wrong, and I am so sorry, because that's what Ed needs to hear to move forward.

And that's such a kind, positive way to end the story of Izzy Hands.

[veeagainsttheday]

I adore this but I think I might be understanding it differently than a lot of other people - Ed is telling this story about notorious pirate Stede Bonnet, not his co-innkeeper, who of course goes by a different, cool name. Same as Ed, who is certainly not Blackbeard. So these guests are getting a bit of the experience Stede did with Black Pete telling him stories about Blackbeard before they met - they're going to leave being like, "so that innkeeper Jeff sure has a crush on notorious pirate Stede Bonnet"

[ofmdrecaps]

10/05/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Matthew Maher's Birthdayl S2 Anniversary; David Jenkins; Rhys Darby; Samba Schutte: BTS; S2 Anniversary Fan tributes!; Stats & Trends; Truly Docked Events; OFMD Buys Boats - The Raffle News; Love Notes;

== Matthew Maher's Birthday! ==

Happy birthday to our fabulous Pete!! Happy birthday Matthew! We hope it is absolutely amazing!! Thank you to @adoptourcrew for spotlighting his b-day!

Check out their dedication video!

Source: Adopt Our Crew Tumblr

== S2 Anniversary ==

Happy S2 anniversary yall! It's be been one year since s2 came out! So much activity has been going on!

= David Jenkins =

Pirate Dad, David Jenkins has been very VERY ACTIVE today!

He even was kind enough to respond to some fandom fun! Note: I removed the users name and handle since they went private (I can only assume cause of people being jerks). Pro Tip: If you don't like something, don't be a dick about it. - David Jenkins

Annnnd Chaos Dad answered our friend @thought-balloon!!

Source: David Jenkins Twitter

= Samba Schutte =

Samba joined in the fun by giving us NEW BTS!!!

Source: Samba Schutte's Instagram

= Adopt Our Crew =

Our friends at Adopt Our Crew sent a lovely message in honor of the anniversary <3

Source: Adopt Our Crew Instagram

== S2 Anniversary Fan Spotlight ==

So many fans brought out some beautiful dedications for us as well!

= Emcolbs =

The lovely @emcolbs made such an absolutely stunning tribute to OFMD, Stede and Ed becoming mateys! Excuse me while I cry like a baby. You can get a copy of this for free to print out on em's Ko-Fi! Visit em on her various socials! Instagram / Tumblr / InPrint

Source: Emcolbs Twitter

= Illustory Art =

Our darling friend @illustoryart made this delightfully detailed and colorful tribute to OFMD for the S2 Anniversary! I can never get over the unique and adorable style of their art! Check Illustory art out on Twitter / Instagram!

Source: Illustory Art Twitter / Instagram

= Moss Groves =

Look at this brilliant dedication done by our so very talented @mossgroves! Their likenesses for Stede and Ed are second to none, and always bring such light and love to these two <3 Visit Moss Groves Linktr.ee for more of her exquisite work!

Source: MossGroves Twitter

= Ram Ranch =

Our fantastic friend Ram, has really knocked this tribute to OFMD out of the park. His work is always so stunningly lit, and detailed and seeing our boys as mateys makes me tear up just like Ed <3 Look at those butterflies! Please check out his other work on Twitter and Instagram!

Source: Ram Ranch Twitter

= Lumillys =

Another adorable and so incredibly creative dedication to OFMD was done by the dazzling @lumiilys! Check out this incredibly inventive pop up book Ollie made! You can check out his work on his various socials: Twitter / Tumblr / Instagram

Source: Lumiily's twitter 

= Jaskierx =

This sweet dedication to our show really hit me hard today so thank you Lyse <3 You always know exactly what to say.

Source: Jaskierx Tumblr

= A Muse of Fyre =

And another lovely tribute to S2 by our friend @amuseoffyre and their insanely awesome muppet Ed and Stede!

Source: Amuseoffyre's Twitter

Obviously there were so many lovely dedications! I just wanted to highlight some that really caught my eye and was able to get permission to share!!

== Stats & Trends ==

Our friends over at Never Left Podcast was kind enough to share that OFMD is still the 9th most popular show on max for the s2 Anniversary!

Source: Never Left Podcast Twitter

Also, our dear crewmate Lucy was able to catch #OurFlagMeansDeath trending for the S2 Anniversary!

Source: Lucy aka Butterscup95 on Twitter

== Truly Docked Events ==

Our friends over at Truly Dock Gatherings & Events have another event coming up on January 24, 2026! This time in St. Augustine, Florida!

"We are chartering a private sail which will include dinner, a pirate battle, and more! More details on the ticket page!"

Tickets: https://truly-docked-ofmd.ticketleap.com/truly-docked-2026/

Discord: https://discord.gg/b9Sv5u96uF

Source: TrulyDockedOFMD Instagram

== OFMD Buys Boats - The Raffle ==

More updates! Interested in the raffle? More info below!

Linktr.ee

Instagram

Twitter

Reddit

Tumblr

Facebook

You can sign up for email updates here!

Or Email them at ofmd.buys.boats@gmail.com!

Source: OFMD Buys Boats Facebook

Source: OFMD Buys Boats Facebook

== Love Notes ==

Hey lovelies! First of all! Happy S2 Anniversary!

I know this is a day late, sorry about that! There's been a lot of chatter over some of the things that David said yesterday-- some folks took it as OFMD was not getting an s3, some people took it as still quite hopeful! I gotta say, I'm loving how much it's given us all something to focus on again. We get to celebrate OFMD-- we get to speculate. I realize it's not a "hey s3 is happening!" but it's hopeful, and what is life without hope? It's kraken era, it's gravy basket, and HOPE is what pulls us OUT of those places! So go out and clown/honk and celebrate if you want to! Take every tweet from David as a good thing! If you don't want to-- that's okay too! But with so many months of "hey we've reached the end of the road" looming over us, it feels like a good thing to think there's going to "most if not all of us would do it again in a heartbeat". This fandom wears hope well, at least I think so. Alright, I'm already late so I'm gonna shush. I hope you all had a lovely anniversary, and the beginning of this week treats you with nothing but kindness lovelies. Take care of yourselves <3

[justarandombrit]

Okay, so in case anyone couldn't make it to the livestream (and just because I wanted to), I wrote down some notes while watching it, so if anyone wants to read them, they're below the cut. (Also sorry ANI fans, my dad came in to borrow a pencil while the ANI segment was happening, so I missed a lot of it)

. There was a 4 minute long intro voice over before AVPM

. James watched AVPM

. 600,000 and Lauren plays the green screen piano

. 700,000 and Lauren does an architectural digest on the green screen house

. Jon really loves Ready To Go

. Darren keeps letting Joey know he sounds like shit on old recordings

. Pinball Pete’s burnt down 🙏🙏

. MAMD was the first student produced album to make the charts

. A Very Potter Sequel’s name came before A Very Potter Musical

. They accidentally wrote Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

. James gave Julia Albain leg splints

. During Starship the entire cast was breathing fibreglass

. Starship was called “knowingly amateurish”

. Darren was supposed to write 15 songs for Starship, but he got cast on GLEE

. Darren flew in to join a rehearsal as a surprise, ran in singing Beauty and everyone was so pissed

. Everyone still loves Kick It Up A Notch

. Nick: “Which was Holy Musical B@man-

Lauren: “Fuck yeah”

. They made up Sweet Tooth, and then found out he was an actual Batman villain

. Matt came up with “Calendar Man, your days are numbered” in his dream, and it was so good it forced him awake to instantly call Nick

. Everyone thought the flying machine joke was the best AVPM joke

. Goin' Back To Hogwarts Reprise made everyone cry

. AVPSY was five hours long

. Curt saw AVPSY

. Darren arrived 2 hours before the show and didn't get a chance to read through a lot of the script

. Darren came up with “I hope you find that swimming pool”

. Joey ate one banana on the day of AVPSY and during Sidekick went “I'm losing my vision”

. They had to pay the hotel union $11,000 to use THEIR OWN microphones, and Darren's STILL BROKE

. Jeff accidentally washed out his Aladdin hair dye

. A.J. Holmes had the same agent as Jafar's original VA, and they got him to do the intro and say “pee” and “poop” in Jafar's voice

. ANI was, as we know, expected to be a hit, and, as we know, it was not

. TTO was, as we know, expected to fail, and, as we know, did not

. TTO had a batshit cast party

. Pierce used to ask Matt insanely complicated questions before bed, e.g, “How did WWII happen?”

. Firebringer was a really old concept

. Literally no one questioned why the “I don't really wanna do the work today” clip had loads of people dressed as cavewomen + cavemen

. Firebringer was the first show Jon saw live

. They made up all the Hatchetfield shows at the same time

. Nick kept making sure Paul was having fun

. The song from the Pirate Show, “Born To Be Wretched goes so fucking hard. Like if a sea shanty was a musical theatre song essentially

. Mariah: “Rich gays, please give”

. Lauren choreographed Show Stoppin' Number

. People actually gave Lauren their phones when she asked in Inevitable, and they would take them backstage and take selfies before giving them back. One time it was locked and she shouted “WHAT'S THE PASSCODE?!?!?”

. Joey: “I'm in the middle of Wiggle”

. Everyone was ill during Black Friday

. Bryce saw Black Friday

. BRYCE GOT THE APPLE

. Nick told her “Interesting things happen here” when showing her to the seat

. Ahhh when Jeff played Tom…

. Angela was in Jaime’s improv class

. Angela is no longer on vocal rest

. Angela had to kill Sherman with a finger gun one night

. Will was 100% ready for NPMD

. Will was at a party they went to during A Very Starkid Reunion

. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR STARKID

. Rip Kim

. The Docks of Troutspear is sung by Matt’s favourite character (it also slaps)

. The Pit Stop in Hatchetfield livestream is going to be a tag team deathmatch

. I love Starkid so much

[footnotesaregreat]

ofmd headcannons bc i physically can’t stop thinking about these bitches

izzy sings at lucius and pete’s ceremony probably fly me to the moon or killing me softly (written by laszlo cravensworth & later plagiarized)

at the party that follows they all gather up singing shanties, ed & izzy whispering the lyrics to stede, who is still getting the hang of pirate music

stede & ed are supporting izzy’s back, that is still healing, despite his protests

they are also holding hands (ed-stede, stede-izzy)

jim, archie, olu & zheng are sitting suspiciously close

auntie & jackie instantly become besties

wee john, frenchie, roach & the swede are playing some intricate card game but wee john keeps losing deliberately to go back to his knitting

he’s making sweaters for all of them because Winter Is Coming & none of them have warm clothes

when a seagull lands on deck & refuses to stop pinching ed everyone knows who it is

he stays with them for about a week at a time & always comes back

they made a little nest in the sleeping quarters for him right next to roach & the swede

ed has permanently moved into stede’s room & they’ve made a new bed to fit three people for the nights iz wants some company

they also have room with the rest of the crew for the nights when they prefer to sleep alone.

 ed & fang go fishing almost everyday & after a couple weeks they don’t need to speak & just sit in comfortable silence

stede keeps training with iz, taking turns fighting zheng & jim

when ed returns one day with fang & sees stede beating all three of them he wants to fight him more than ever. their duel goes on for a long time, the bets placed by the crew reaching extreme heights. in the end stede knocks him down & disarms him. everyone, especially pete, lose their fucking minds

at night stede still reads them stories, sometimes new from recent books he’s gotten, but usually the now familiar fairy tales calm them down the most

sometimes stede, ed, iz, jim, archie, olu, zheng, lucius & pete go on date nights where they try different food, listen to music, sharing sweets

frenchie, wee john, fang & roach can often be seen sticking together, not really seeking any romantic or sexual relationship, but simply wanting companionship

when izzy’s unicorn hoof finally gives out he is absolutely heartbroken so of course the entire crew go out to find him the most durable materials to make him another one

they give it to him the next day & it’s decorated by stede, lucius & surprisingly zheng

wee john has also knitted him a leg warmer for whenever he needs a break from the prosthetic

iz obviously loses his shit when he sees it & totally doesn’t call them twats

then they all proceed to fall on top of him to engulf him in an annoyingly wet hug, ed & stede sneaking two kisses on his cheeks

they often have themed parties to make use of stede’s unending secret wardrobe

wee john, iz & jim rule these parties being the best drag queens & king

after a couple years they dock on a small, peaceful town. everyone immediately loves it there & that’s when stede & ed decide to retire

they use ed’s treasure to buy a large building & the whole crew work together to turn it into an inn

 they officially open ‘The Gentle Unicorn Inn’ (ed chose the name)

they also have a little tavern right next to it called ‘Jeff’s’ (they have a lot of fun whenever someone asks ‘who’s jeff?’)

ann & mary regularly pop by & drop off some antiques ann’s looted, for stede to either keep or even sell

every couple of months or so the crew visit for a few days & all of them have designated rooms in the inn

sometimes ed & stede close for a week or so to go on a little trip on the ‘revenge’ with the crew

izzy will go & stay with them more often than the rest of them & even though he doesn’t have his own room he has no problem staying at stede & ed’s

he always sleeps in the middle of their bed

[the-golden-comet]

✨OC Origins Name Tag Game✨

Thank you for the tag, @katenewmanwrites , @willtheweaver , @mysticstarlightduck , @the-letterbox-archives , @lychhiker-writes , and @kaylinalexanderbooks ! And thank you for both the tag AND the game, @pixies-love-envy ! Though, I think people will be disappointed to hear most of these are just my brain saying, “Yeah I like how that sounds”

I want to know how you came up with your original character’s names and personalities. Are they based on people in your real life? Are they straight from your brain? Are they a mix of several people?

Speaking of….

Peter Hart

So obviously “Hart” and “Heart” having a double meaning, but a “hart” is also the name of a male deer in England, and I see Peter as a handsome young buck. A leader of his pack, looks gentle enough, but will absolutely gore you with his antlers if you get too close.

And the name Peter? Brain said: “What’s a good name that Benjamin can yell in a British accent? Peter. That’ll do.” Also lots of pirates with names consisting of “Pete” (though Peter hates this nickname)

Benjamin Bartholomew

(If anyone is named Benjamin Matthias Bartholomew, I apologize in advance for what I’m about to say)

I basically asked my brain: “Pick the most pompous, pretentious, princely sounding name you can think of.” And this is what it came up with. Also his initials are BB, and he is, indeed, BB ✨

Ali

“Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves” from Scheherazade’s 1001 Nights.

Noah

The Story of Noah’s Ark (his eyes are olive-colored)

Tenshi

Japanese for “Angel”. Bro’s name is literally Angel.

Tyrell (Tyr)

Named after Tyr the Norse God of War, Heroic Endeavor, and Justice. Also “Tyrell” means “stubborn,” and he ABSOLUTELY is.

Tagging (no pressure): @fortunatetragedy (curious about Sullivan, Royston, and Khalid Abandonado), @autism-purgatory , @alinacapellabooks , @gioiaalbanoart , @wyked-ao3 , @drchenquill , @lychhiker-writes , @honeybewrites , @deanwax , @sunglasses-in-the-bentley , @jev-urisk ,+open tag! ✨

[collinrobinsonsglasses]

Too Soft to be a Pirate

Izzy Hands x Reader (GN)

Chapter 4 of a series, but I think this one can be read by itself. <3

Summary: Blackbeard invades Stede Bonnet's ship. It follows along with the chaos of season 1 episode 4. When the reader thinks they're facing death they decide to shoot their shot with Izzy.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter}

{Next Chapter}

Chapter 4: Discomfort in a Married State

Among all the pirate ships you’d encountered in your time sailing with Blackbeard, Stede Bonnet’s ship stood out as the most unique. The ship's cabins were stocked with an assortment of knick-knacks and exquisite china. The majority of your morning was devoted to wandering the ship, discovering its hidden treasures. 

Stede Bonnet’s crew had been assembled on the deck, currently enduring the wrath of Izzy Hands. Recognizing that you would soon be drawn into the chaos, you took a moment to enjoy the temporary peace. You stumbled upon Fang fixated on one of the cabinets. The shelves were lined with a spectacle of intricately decorated tea cups resting on saucers. 

“I like these!” Fang whispered to you as you joined him, his eyes sparkling with excitement. “Look at all the pretty little flowers painted on them”. 

“I like them too,” you responded smiling, giving his arm a gentle squeeze. 

Fang had an intimidating presence upon first glance. His stature was imposing, and he was a skilled fighter, capable of unleashing fierceness when he needed to. Yet, the Fang you had come to know was surprisingly gentle and sensitive. He was like a colossal teddy bear–a teddy bear with the potential to be lethal, but over the year of knowing him, you couldn’t help but grow more fond of his sensitive side. 

Ivan found both you and Fang, each holding a teacup close to your faces, thoroughly examining every little detail on the delicate glass. Ivan joined you in examining the teacups for a while before letting you know that Izzy had summoned everyone to the deck. You followed behind Fang and Ivan, joining Bonnet’s crew just as one of the men remarked that he expected Blackbeard to be taller. Fang delivered a solid whack to Black Pete’s stomach, earning a swift reprimand from Blackbeard.

As Blackbeard delivered his opening speech to Bonnet’s crew, your attention was fixed on the first mate. Izzy appeared exhausted from the unfolding situation, a stark contrast to Blackbeard’s seemingly joyful mood. It didn’t take long for Izzy to grow tired of his captain’s antics, prompting him to demand that everyone return to work. You empathized with Izzy. Managing the entire crew while navigating Blackbeard’s unpredictable moods seemed like a challenge. Izzy worked hard to ensure everyone’s safety, but it seemed like no one ever really acknowledged his efforts.   

Blackbeard retreated to Stede Bonnet’s cabin, and the remaining crew members from the Queen Anne’s Revenge dispersed to attend to other tasks aboard the ship. You observed Frenchie struggling to free his sleeve from a nail, realizing he inadvertently hammered his jacket to the deck. Taking a seat beside him, you grabbed the hammer and attempted to pry the nail from the wood, working to free Frenchie. Since you boarded his ship, you hadn’t had the chance to speak with him yet. 

“Your part of Blackbeard's crew then? I think that is fairly badass”, Frenchie remarked, casting a curious glance in your direction. Fortunately, Frenchie didn’t seem upset that you had failed to mention that on your first encounter. 

You smiled back at him, having successfully liberated his jacket from the dock. 

“Do you think we’re gonna be able to live or die?” Frenchie whispered nervously. 

“I think you’ll live,” you responded, contemplating your captain’s demeanor. “Blackbeard seems to be in a good mood, and he’s spending a lot of time taking care of your captain.”

You both chatted and shared laughs as you worked together to repair the dock. Frenchie pointed out his crewmates, offering a name and brief description for each of them. As you conversed with Frenchie, you failed to notice that Izzy had returned to the quarterdeck, and was shooting daggers in your direction. You finally noticed Izzy’s presence on deck as Buttons handed him a spyglass to gaze out at the sea. This led to Izzy cursing repeatedly as he headed in your direction. 

“Get up,” he said, seizing your arm and lifting you to stand. “You’re coming with me to find Blackbeard.” He shot a glare at Frenchie as he led you away, grumbling, “Do your own fucking work, you useless twat.” 

You and Izzy commenced the search for your captain in silence, scouring the ship. With each room you explored, you could sense Izzy’s impatience and anger escalating. “You shouldn’t be conversing or helping Bonnet’s crew,” Izzy huffed, breaking the silence. “We’ve invaded them. It’s beyond me why you’d choose to engage with their bunch when you have competent people on your crew you could talk to.” 

“Sorry, sir,” you replied genuinely, not wanting to further aggravate Izzy. 

Entering Stede’s cabin, you found it vacant. “Edward, are you in here?” Izzy called out into the empty room. 

“Why do you need to find him? What’s going on?” you inquired of Izzy. 

“The Spanish are approaching, and if we don’t come up with a plan soon we’re going to die”, Izzy spat. 

“Blackbeard has a plan though, right? He always has a plan,” you said with a tinge of fear in your voice. 

“Yes. Blackbeard always has a plan, but whoever the fuck we’re dealing with as of late is not Blackbeard”, Izzy responded with disdain. “I don’t know who that twat is.” 

Fang and Ivan quickly joined the search around the ship. Upon entering the galley, you found Bonnet’s crew enjoying a meal. Izzy was visibly displeased by this scene, and it resulted in another slap on the back of Black Pete’s head. Your three crewmates exited as quickly as they entered, and you lingered a bit longer in the galley, creating a buffer for yourself from the irate Izzy. 

“Alls I know is women are bad luck on ships. Historically”, Black Pete continued their previous conversation once he had seen the men leave. 

“That’s a myth!” Jim shot back, glaring at Pete. 

“Jim’s right!” you chimed in. “Haven’t you heard of Anne Bonny or Mary Read?” 

All eyes turned toward you in surprise as you entered the conversation. 

“Two legendary pirates, and both of them were women,” you said decisively. 

“I’m glad someone on this ship has some sense.” Jim exclaimed, giving you a nod of approval. 

You swiftly left to catch up with Izzy as the crew’s argument continued. You didn’t want the first mate to catch you fraternizing with the others again. As you were departing, you heard Frenchie begin explaining the science behind why women attract demons. 

You caught up with Izzy and the search to find Blackbeard persisted until he ultimately threw in the towel. You stood on the deck with Ivan and Fang as Bonnet’s crew carried on with their tasks on the ship. Out of the blue, Blackbeard emerged from the captain’s cabin, donned in a stylish pair of pink trousers and a billowy white shirt. Blackbeard made a dancing motion, moving the oversized sleeves of his shirt back and forth. Glancing at Ivan and Fang beside you, they appeared utterly stunned. 

As you attempted to recover from the initial shock of seeing Blackbeard in fancy attire, Stede appeared wearing Blackbeard’s leather. You glanced at Izzy in that moment, observing the veins bulging on his forehead. This was an entirely new level of anger for him. You noticed Izzy engaging in a conversation with your captain, and they temporarily stepped away. You watched as Bonnet’s crew lined up to greet him. Blackbeard’s clothes looked out of place on Stede. After a while you witnessed Izzy making a beeline towards Captain Bonnet, forcefully dragging him past you and down below the deck. Ivan and Fang followed closely behind. 

Blackbeard nonchalantly followed the group, then paused to flash you a cocky smile. “Hey, little mouse,” he grinned.  

“Stede Bonnet suits you,” you smiled back, pointing to his new outfit. 

“I agree,” he said, giving a little twirl before descending below deck. 

Once Blackbeard descended the stairs, the fog began to set in, prompting Black Pete to declare your captain a genius. You sighed in relief, rolling your eyes as you realized Blackbeard had likely been causing Izzy stress for his own entertainment. Blackbeard took great delight in unveiling the plan he had orchestrated all along, and you watched him putting on a show for all the new faces on the ship. When Izzy pointed out he had the date wrong, the mood quickly shifted. Blackbeard declared death was imminent before wandering back to Stede’s cabin declaring he was going to get drunk. 

For a moment, the entire crew froze on deck, confusion painted on their faces. You observed as each crew member slowly dispersed, heading toward what they wanted to do or who they wanted to spend their last moments with. Seeking solace, you went and sat on the stairs leading up to the quarterdeck, pondering various thoughts in your head. 

Fang found you there and joined you, sipping from a teacup. Ivan quickly followed, leaning against the banister. It wasn’t surprising that Fang and Ivan would want to spend their last moments together. Their deep connection and care for each other was clear since the moment you first met them. 

“What are you drinking, Fang?” you asked, smiling at his cup of choice. 

“Rum!” Fang giggled. “It tastes even better from this cup.” 

“Very fancy!” you replied in a playful tone. 

Your attention shifted to Izzy, leaving the deck and returning with the rum bottle you had given him. He slowly paced towards the bow of the ship, looking defeated, and then disappeared. Fang watched you as you observed Izzy. 

“You should let that little angry man know how you feel,” Fang suggested gently. 

You shot Fang a look, but did not respond. That suggestion was so ridiculous it didn’t deserve a response.  

Ivan tapped his foot against yours to get your attention before speaking. “He’s right, you know. What do you have to lose?” 

“My life, Ivan,” you replied, looking at both men with wide eyes. “I fully believe if I tried to talk about my feelings with Izzy he would stab me.” 

Fang rested his hand on your knee and squeezed lovingly. “If you don’t tell him now, you might never get to. The likelihood of death is high either way,” Fang teased softly. 

“Come on!” Ivan exclaimed, grabbing your hand and lifting you from your seated position. “We want what’s best for you, pip-squeak. It’s obvious you want to talk to him.” 

You stopped to look at both men for a second. Your heart swelled in your chest, and you kissed them both on the cheek. “Thank you for always looking after me,” you whispered before heading toward the bow. 

You discovered Izzy seated against the wall, his feet stretched out as he gazed at the ocean. 

“Hey, Izzy,” you said quietly, feeling your heart pound against your chest. “Can I join you?” 

Izzy didn’t verbally reply but shifted over, leaving enough space for you to sit on the floor next to him. There wasn’t much room on the bow’s deck, but you weren’t complaining. You settled down beside him, feeling one of your legs firmly press against his in the confined space. He glanced at you for a moment before offering the bottle of rum he was holding. 

“You got me this, so it’s only fair for me to share,” he said gruffly. 

Taking a sip, you felt the alcohol burn as it traveled from your throat to your stomach, warming you up inside and providing a momentary distraction. 

“I can’t believe I’m going to die on a ship with a fucking unicorn as it’s figurehead,” Izzy uttered in disbelief. 

“I like that it’s a unicorn”, you replied sweetly. 

“Why? Because it’s pretty?” Izzy replied, his tone condescending. 

Disregarding his comment, you continued speaking. “It was just my mom and me growing up, and she always told me stories about unicorns,” you said, your gaze fixed on the figurehead. “There’s a legend that their horns can purify poisoned water. I like the idea that even something that’s been poisoned can undergo transformation with the touch of the right creature.” You paused for a second, anticipating a sarcastic comment from the first mate. However, when he remained silent, you continued. 

“They’re often described in myths as proud, fiercely independent, and powerful creatures,” you smiled, recognizing that you were also describing the man sitting next to you. “I used to tell my mom that one day I was going to catch one. But, I’ve come to realize that maybe creatures like that are meant to be admired from afar. Being able to witness their beauty is enough.” 

You turned toward Izzy to discover him gazing at you, as if attempting to unravel a mystery. Taking one final sip from the bottle of rum, you handed it back to him. “Unicorns are also really pretty,” you said as you offered a teasing smile. Izzy returned your smile, the warmth in his eyes devoid of any smugness, as if sharing a genuine moment of connection. 

A moment of silence lingered before you spoke again. “If I ask you a question, Izzy, do you promise not to stab me?” 

“Depends on the question. Ask at your own risk.” Izzy responded with a wry smile. 

“Why are you still sailing with Blackbeard? I know he’s a legend, but it seems like he takes great pleasure in tormenting you,” you asked hesitantly. 

You observed Izzy take a deep breath before responding. “Edward and I built a legacy together. He’s brilliant and one of the best sailors I’ve ever met. It’s my duty as first mate to watch out for him. I owe him that. That’s why I’ve stayed by his side for so long, despite his recent descent into insanity.” 

“It’s just that you’re always looking out for Blackbeard and the rest of the crew, but who’s looking out for you?” you said, peering into his eyes. 

He locked eyes with you and whispered, “I don’t need anyone taking care of me.” 

"I think you do." you said leaning in closer, your voice gentle yet firm. 

Izzy fixed his gaze on you, as if deep in contemplation. 

A strand of hair danced across your face with the wind. Izzy delicately used his fingers to tuck it behind your ear, resting his thumb against your face. You leaned into his touch, and as you did, you noticed his eyes look down towards your lips. He refocused his gaze on yours, and you inched closer, your eyes now dropping to his lips. In an instant, Izzy’s lips met yours. 

Izzy’s kiss was slow and tender. His lips, soft and tasting of the lingering rum you both had shared. Time seemed to pause as you lost yourself in the moment, feeling the warmth of his touch. The kiss deepened, evolving into a desperate exchange, as if you both had been waiting an eternity to be enveloped in each other’s embrace. Izzy, with an urgency, pulled you onto his lap, your knees resting on either side of his extended legs. His hands firmly grabbing your waist, drawing you in even closer. Your arms found their way around his neck, and your hands rested entangled in Izzy’s hair.

“Izzy! Where are you?” Blackbeard’s voice echoed across the ship. “We need to be a lighthouse!” he yelled. 

Izzy abruptly halted the kiss upon hearing his captain’s voice. “Fuck,” he mumbled to himself, leaning his head against the wall and closing his eyes briefly. With a reluctant sigh, he gently moved you off his lap and stood up, the weight of responsibility settling back onto his shoulders. As he walked back towards the deck a mixture of frustration and resignation played across his features. 

“Fuck!” you whispered, frustration echoing in your voice as you laid back on the deck where Izzy had left you. With a sigh, you covered your face with your hands, trying to process the abrupt interruption. The cool wood beneath you provided a stark contrast to the warmth that still lingered from your stolen moment with the first mate. 

Upon returning to the deck, Izzy was nowhere to be found, and a mirror was being hoisted onto the top of the mast. The rest of the crew stood towards the edge of the ship, staring out into the ocean. You squeezed your way in between Ivan and Fang, purposefully avoiding eye contact with them. You zoned out for a while, but the world snapped back into focus as you were enveloped in a hug by Fang and Ivan. “It worked,” Ivan whispered with excitement. 

As the chaos gradually died down, you decided to look for Izzy and guessed he was hiding in his cabin. 

⚓⚓⚓⚓⚓⚓⚓

In his cabin, Izzy moved with a sense of urgency, hastily stuffing his belongings into bags. The decision was made - he couldn’t stay on this ship any longer. He had given Blackbeard his resignation along with his two middle fingers and called him a twat. If he had a choice on who to spend his last night on earth with, Izzy would have undoubtedly chosen Ed. However, Edward had opted for Stede Fucking Bonnet, adding an extra layer of frustration to the already complex emotions Izzy was grappling with. He loved Edward, but he hated whoever this man was, posing as him. 

The kiss Izzy shared with you weighed heavily on his conscience. It was a moment of weakness, a brief escape from the looming threat of death.  He had allowed himself something soft and nice that he didn’t deserve. Deep down, Izzy felt undeserving of any affection from you. In his eyes, no one on this ship deserved you, especially not a group of pirates. He hated that you were a pirate. You were too pure for that. You had a sweetness like no one else he had ever met. He wanted to taste it when he thought there would be no consequences. The fact that life would continue complicated things. 

Izzy was well aware that the kiss meant nothing to you. He understood that people sought comfort in moments of impending death, trying to ease the overwhelming fear of the end. 

Izzy’s thoughts were abruptly halted by the sound of a knock on his cabin door. 

“Izzy?” your voice called out, causing an unexpected tightness in his chest. “Can we talk?” 

Izzy wordlessly swung the door open to welcome you in, but deliberately avoided meeting your eyes. He remained focused on the task of packing his belongings. 

“Where are you going, Izzy?” you inquired, your voice carrying a quiet concern that echoed in the confined space of the cabin. 

“I’m leaving tomorrow morning. There are things I did and said tonight that I regret,” Izzy confessed, his words hanging in the air. 

Had Izzy been observing you, he would have noticed the profound pain etched across your features in response to those words. 

“I’m not going to tell anyone about what happened between us, Izzy,” you assured, your voice carrying a tone of sincerity. 

“It’s more than just about you,” Izzy responded. 

“Why did you kiss me?” you asked, seeking some answers from Izzy. 

“Oh, fuck off. It’s the same reason you kissed me back. A distraction. Nothing more,” Izzy retorted, dismissing the question. 

“Got it,” you replied in a hushed tone, walking away from his cabin. 

When Izzy finally looked up, he realized you were no longer there. 

⚓⚓⚓⚓⚓⚓⚓

You briskly walked away from the first mate’s cabin, making your way to the familiar spot on the stairs. It was there that the first tear escaped, followed by a cascade of emotions that manifested in silent sobs. Hastily, you brushed the tears away, determined not to attract any unwanted attention. You settled into a quiet moment, resting your head on your knees, listening to the rhythmic sound of waves caressing the side of the ship. 

“Hey, friend,” a gentle voice reached out to you as a hand softly nuzzled your hair. 

You glanced up to discover fang standing before you, with a sheepish look on his face. 

“Wanna talk about it?” he inquired. 

You responded with a subtle shake of your head, maintaining silence. Returning your forehead to your knees, you sense Fang settling on the stair beside you, his hand gently rubbing your back in a soothing rhythm. He stayed next to you for quite a while. 

A large part of you dreaded Izzy’s departure, but a small part of you wondered if distance would be the best thing for him. You had a feeling Edward wasn't finished with Stede Bonnet yet, and you knew Izzy would likely continue getting hurt. 

As your thoughts continued to race, you knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep, so you decided to just stay on deck watching the waves. With the first rays of dawn, you witnessed Izzy assembling his dinghy, ready to part ways. Edward hopped down from the mast, engaging in a conversation with his first mate. You were too far away to hear what they were saying. 

The exchange concluded with Izzy calling out to Edward, a fond smile gracing his face. “You still got it,” he remarked, loud enough for you to catch. 

"I know.", Edward replied before turning towards you. In that fleeting moment, you detected a subtle change in his demeanor - a fleeting hardness in his eyes as he thought he was unobserved. His attention, however, quickly shifted to you as he approached. 

"He's staying around, little mouse. Don't you worry.", Edward assured, giving your shoulder a reassuring squeeze as he ascended the stairs towards the ship’s helm. 

Forcing a smile in response, you felt a pang of sadness within you. Edward, consumed by his own thoughts, didn’t register your expression. The familiar look on Izzy’s face as he watched Blackbeard walk away told a story you knew too well. He was always going to choose Edward. While you couldn’t blame Izzy for succumbing once again to Edward’s persuasive nature, it didn’t make the situation any less heartbreaking. The legendary Blackbeard was a force that you, with all your sincerity and affection, could never rival. Edward would remain an anchor for Izzy, his heart forever tethered to him.

{Next Chapter}

[pandalorian36]

Izzy x (Genderneutral)Reader

Ed reveals the reason Izzy is always so grumpy and short tempered is because he got separated from you.

Warnings: Mentions of blood, knives/swords. Word count: 4655

Izzy stomps away from yet another shouting match muttering under his breath as he goes the rest of the crew staring after him in a state of shock. He had never yelled that much for something so little. Lucius had kissed Pete on the cheek and next thing Izzy was yelling and cursing about everything. “Well, that was intense.” Lucius nods agreeing with his partner just as Stede and Ed emerge onto deck “What the blazes was that all about?” Ed glances over at his first mate and Roach speaks up “Izzy snapped.”

Ed nods slightly “We heard that. Why?” Lucius glances at Pete “I kissed Pete on the cheek.” Stede looks shocked “Something so small? Really? We thought someone had broken the ship.” Ed looks confused a moment before looking up speaking quickly “What’s the date?”

“Sorry?”

“The date. Today. What is it?”

Lucius looks at the diary tucked under his arm “June 2nd possibly 3rd.” Ed, Ivan and Fang all exchange a look of understanding “June 3rd. I’ll go check on him.” Ed leaves the rest of the crew gathering around Ivan and Fang who clearly have the rest of the story. Stede pipes up “What happened June 3rd?" Ivan sighs shrugging “It was just over two years ago. We raided a merchant vessel, turned out to have a lot more weapons on board than we intended and was actually full of trained soldiers. We managed to set the ship a light and get back to the Queen Anne when the flames hit a gunpowder storage. Lucky our ship wasn’t damaged, but it caused a big confusion.”

He stops and Fang takes over the story “those that were on the main deck didn’t get injured, but it did confuse us enough that the merchant crew managed to take charge. Two of our crew where captured which did allow the rest to escape but Ed forbid us from going back. We now know one was killed but the second we don’t know. Their name was Y/N, they were Izzy’s. Partner? Lover? Companion? Actually, I’m not sure what they were but they were incredibly close, always had each other’s backs. God, forbid you threatened one of them the other was always close by. They were the only one who could best Izzy at swordplay,” he grins “Part from Stede.”

Ivan sighs “Before we lost Y/N, Izzy was actually pretty tolerable. He’s always had a temper and a tendency to threaten people, but Y/N could always calm them. Couldn’t help but like Y/N, don’t get me wrong they were a ruthless pirate, loyal to Ed and Izzy. Forgot to mention Y/N was Ed’s younger sibling, least we think so. Fiercely protective of each other.”

The whole crew remains silent taking the information in. Ed leans on the railing next to Izzy crossing his arms out over the water “I miss ‘em too Iz.”

“Fuck off Edward.”

“I just thought… Actually, don’t know what I thought.”

Izzy sighs shoulders sagging “Why couldn’t we go back?” Ed frowns staring out over the sea “I had to think of the crew. If we had gone back, you know none of us would of come away.” Ed clasps Izzy’s shoulder “Y/N probably would have some stupid motivational crap to say to ya but fraid all I got is they’re gone mate, not anything we can do about it. Just have to move on.” Ed walks away Stede falling into step beside him “You never mentioned you had a brother/sister?”

Ed shrugs slightly walking back into their cabin “Not something I like to talk about. They’re dead not anything can do about it.”

“Still, you must miss them. Where you close?” Ed sighs falling onto the sofa “Suppose we we’re close yea. Them and Izzy where the only two I ever trusted.” Stede sits on the edge of the sofa by Ed’s feet frowning “I’m sorry.” Ed shrugs “‘is alright. Sometimes feel guilty for it though. You know? I was captain, I ordered the raid and the burning of the ship.”

“It’s not your fault Ed,” Stede tries to sound reassuring patting his leg “I’m sure there was nothing you could have done.” Ed flips himself around, so his head is in Stedes lap letting him play with his hair “It’s not your fault.”

Izzy is still standing over the railing the ring usually safe around his neck scarf clasped between thumb and finger.

“Izzy.” Y/N hisses from the shadows pulling the first mate away from the crowds “What the fuck are you doing?” Y/N rolls their eyes “Playing crochet. What do you fucking think I’m doing. Captain Vance just turned up.”

“Shit.” Y/N snorts in response “My thoughts exactly. Come on.” The two make their way towards the docks using the back alleys both freezing when a deep gravelly voice echoes down the confined space making it seem louder “Well, well, well what do we have here? Israel Hands and Y/N Teach.” The two-freeze swearing colourfully before turning Izzy raising his sword and Y/N gripping a pistol tightly “What do you want Vance?”

Vance a large bulky man with scars decorating most of his skin the remainder coated in ink. “That’s Captain Vance to you dog.” Y/N scowls their grip on the pistol tightening as the flick the hammer ready to fire “What do you want Captain Vance?”

“I want to kill you two worthless lumps. You torched my ship.” Izzy smiles slightly “Only a little.” Vance seethes “A little. A little? You destroyed it.” Vance takes out two pistols readying them to fire “I would like to draw this out, make it painful and slow. Then watch as Black Beard finds your mutilated bodies. But unfortunately, I do not have that luxury. Still, you will at least be dead.” Y/N shoots first three shots echoing around the alley. Vance falls to the ground blood blossoming from his shoulder while his shots hit the wall sending bits of rock flying.

“Time to go.” Y/N grabs Izzy’s arm the two of them running full pelt from the alley as Vance swearing and spluttering lumbers back to his feet to give chase. Flying out into the busy street where a market is being held the two dodge between stalls skidding down another alley as Vance’s crew appear with their captain in the lead a bloodied cloth to his shoulder “FIND THEM.”

“We’ve got to get back to the ship!” Y/N turns to Izzy pausing when they both realise how close they have gotten in the small space. Izzy’s cheek heat while Y/N smirks “Am I making you uncomfortable Iz?” he shakes his head slightly making the latter chuckle pressing a soft kiss to his cheek before shooting him a wink “I’ll cause a distraction. You get Ed.”

Before Izzy can protest Y/N has leapt onto the closest stool selling jewellery grabbed a fistful of brightly coloured gems and started yelling at the top of their lungs “Captain Vance, I believe these colours would draw the attention away from that ass of a face you have. Although anyone would have to be blind before they even considered you attractive. Least you can fight… oh wait no you can’t. You’re just crap at everything aren’t you.”

Jumping from stall to stall and causing utter chaos in the midst Y/N runs deeper into town while Izzy runs back to the ship to get backup. The two of them may be the best swords on the Queen Anne but they’re also smart enough to know Captain Vance and his crew are not to be messed with. As Izzy reaches the ship as a large explosion shakes the docks a cloud of dust rising from deep inside the town. “What the fuck was that.” Ed appears on the gangplank while Izzy sighs shaking his head slightly “Who do you think?” they both say the same thing in unison “Y/N.”

As if they have been summoned Y/N comes skidding over the rooftop’s tiles falling to the floor before they topple to the ground in a heap when they jump on a barrel that is not secure “What the fuck did you do?” Izzy helps them to their feet “Caused a distraction. Captain Vance will no longer be a problem.” Ed snorts supporting Y/N’s other side as they walk onto the ship “Our worst enemy gone for good. Excellent work. Iz help ‘em get cleaned up gotta make sure we’re ready to go.”

Izzy helps Y/N limp to their cabin “Do I even want to know?” Y/N shrugs “Probably not. Got you something.” Out their pocket they take a simple diamond ring smiling proudly “It’s not real, and pretty sure it’s not even gold but for you.” Izzy takes it slipping it on the handkerchief around his neck “Where did you get it?”

Y/N starts removing their outer layers poking at a wound on their side while talking “Stole it. Its only temporary before I get you something better. Can’t have my man wearing second rate jewellery. But thought you needed something to show you were taken. Not that pirates care for such things. You don’t have to wear it; just thought I don’t know.” Izzy rolls his eyes clamping a hand over Y/Ns mouth to stop their rambling “I’ll wear it. Though we’ve already got tattoos can’t get much more permanent than that.” Y/N shrugs starting to clean their cut before Izzy takes over kneeling between their legs on the floor “Do you think we’ll be okay? With our profession and everything.”

The two stare into each other’s eyes a moment before Y/N closes the gap cupping Izzy’s face gently “We’re gonna be just fine.”

Izzy returns the ring to its rightful place. Y/N did in fact gift him much more most of it stolen but some of it actually bought, including the sword hanging at his side. He glances at the pale band of skin on his ring finger still visible despite two years, the ring that use to sit their long gone. Where he had no idea, but it felt like a stab to the chest every time he saw it was gone. Returning his gaze out over the sea he ignores the whispering crew behind him wishing he could go back and change the past and return Y/N Teach to his side.

Your P/O/V:

Shit. I duck into the nearest alley tugging my hood further forward as a group of navy officer’s marches past in perfect form. Breathing a sigh of relief when they pass, I push back my hood leaning against the wall. Finally free of that cramped cell and tattered clothing. Two years, eight months and three weeks spent in an British prison, it’s a relief to be free. Though wanted posters have started appearing around the docks with a reasonable reward.

Keeping to the shadows I head closer to the docks inspecting the ships currently docked. Taverns are the best place for gossip, and I have heard varying tales of my brother, which ones I believe I am not sure. Most people give me wary looks the heavy hood, leather and two swords crossed across my back and pistol holstered on my thigh don’t exactly scream friendly.

Finding a dingy tavern any member of the navy would avoid like the plague I step inside tossing a few coins on the counter “Rum.” The bartender an elderly man with multiple missing teeth and stringy hair pushes a glass across the counter “And information I imagine?” I smile into my drink “What do you know of Blackbeard?”

“Blackbeard? Queen Anne is under new captainage they was here last week. Not sure where Blackbeard ended up. Word is he’s gone soft sailing with some gentlemen pirate, though few believe those rumours.” I nod finishing my drink he refills it without my asking before moving along the bar to serve someone else. I sip this one leaning back against the bar, gentlemen pirate never heard of him before.

Finishing my second drink I stalk out the bar all I need is a ship. A small vessel catches my eye definitely pirate from the crew loading up supplies I watch from the shadows as they stumble about on deck. Not the most experienced of crew but they will have to all I need is the captain. Someone clears their throat behind me, and I turn “Shit.” The officer grins “Y/N Teach you are under arrest.” I sigh putting my hands in the air “Fine you caught me.” turning away for a second, I form a fist before spinning back catching the officer across the jaw sending him sprawling to the ground.

Taking of I run towards the tree line more shouts echoing behind, so much for a low profile. Several shots ring out as I start zig-zagging closer to the trees jumping over a stack of barrels and a wall before finally reaching the trees. “You are ordered to stop.” I grin speeding up as I enter the trees following a worn path deeper in land before taking a sharp turn back to the coast. Swinging myself up into the low branches I jump from tree to tree watching the navy officers below following my footprints “Where did they go?”

“They can’t be far.”

“Do we kill them?”

I jump to the next tree slowly making my way back to town. Jumping back to the ground I turn quickly when two men yelp. Drawing my sword, I turn lowering it when it is not soldiers. “You never saw me.” they both nod and I take off again reaching a small beach already inhabited. A group of pirates lounging around on the sand. “Captain?” I take a step back ready to run again when two men turn to answer the question: one an elaborately dressed blond who looks more gentleman than pirate the other. “Edward!?”

I would recognise that beard anywhere. I push back my hood taking several steps forward, his eyes widen in recognition “You’re not dead.” I snort “Not last I checked.” He runs over poking my chest then my cheek “You’re really not dead.” I roll my eyes punching him in the stomach making him grunt “Point taken.” I grin “That’s for leaving me behind.” He laughs the two of us colliding in a hug “Can’t believe you’re not dead.” I laugh “Sorry to disappoint.”

He shakes his head “What? No. Not what I meant. Shit. Izzy. Where’s Izzy? Stede where’s Izzy?” Stede the fancy blonde looks confused “Back on the ship. Why?” Ed grins grabbing my arm “Come on.” I dig my heels into the sand “Navy kinda after my head. Town is not a good idea.” Ed frowns only pausing a moment before resuming dragging me across the beach “Nope. Come on.” I manage to tug up my hood as we practically sprint to the ship I spotted earlier and up onto the deck.

“Izzy! Get your butt out here. Iz. Iz. Izzy.” Fang, Ivan, and Izzy all come running onto deck swords drawn “Edward what the hell is going… on?” I push back my hood Izzy’s sword falling to the ground “Look who’s not dead.”

“Y/N?” I smile slightly the rest of the crew disappearing my sole focus on Izzy. “I missed you Iz.” He steps forward still looking a little shell shocked “We thought you were dead.” I shrug slightly “Had a couple close calls but still here.” I smile my stomach tying in knots as I step closer “I can leave if…” I don’t get the chance to finish his body colliding with mine “Don’t. Don’t even.” I chuckle wrapping my arms around him “You really think I would leave Iz? Spent the last two years trying to get back to you.”

His grip tightens but I gently ease his face away from my neck cupping his face in one hand smiling softly “Missed you Iz.” He returns my smile the corners of his eyes crinkling slightly “You’re really here.” I nod leaning my forehead against his “I’m here.” I grin tracing the ring around his neck “Can’t believe you still have this. Which reminds me, this belongs to you.” I tug on the cord around my neck two identical silver bands with waves pressed into the metal. I take one of putting it back where it belongs on Izzy’s ring finger “I thought I lost it.” I shake my head “You left it on the side in our cabin when you helped with my stitches. I was going to return it after the raid and well you know the rest.”

My brother clears his throat the two of us pulling apart “Wait hang on. Izzy is capable of smiling?” I bite my lip leaning down to kiss Izzy’s cheek neither of us had ever been big on PDA, but I want to remind myself he’s real. Izzy scowls at the pirate who spoke making him laugh Ed steps forward before anything else can be said “Everybody. This is my little brother/sister Y/N.” Stede smiles brightly “Stede Bonnet its lovely to meet you.” I shake his hand tentatively shocked when Ed throws an arm around his shoulders smiling lovingly at the strange man “Reunion can wait we really need to get out here.”

We all turn our attention back to the docks where a large number of navy officers have gathered combing the docks from top to bottom. Stede nods “Right. Come along everyone, get the rest of those stores below pronto.” The ship is a flurry of activity as the gang plank is raised and the sails unfurled. I remain tense till we are well out into the open sea, Izzy joins me at the prow, and I move so I can wrap my arms around his waist head resting on his shoulder “So how long has Ed been like this?”

Izzy chuckles leaning forward against the railing my arms atop his “Fair while.” I close my eyes breathing in the sea air enjoying the light breeze that ruffles Izzy’s hair “I’m sorry.” I open my eyes confused. “I thought you were behind us. I should have checked, should have been there for you.” I move my arms so they are wrapped around his chest and waist “Iz there is nothing you could have done. I don’t blame you for what happened.”

“You should.” His voice sounds so small it breaks my heart “I don’t, and neither should you. none of us knew what would happen, pirating ain’t a career known for its safety. The only thing I couldn’t stand was the fact I never got to say goodbye or tell you how much I love you or how much you mean to me.” he turns so we are face to face tears staining his cheeks which I brush away gently “Because I do love you Israel hands. Time has not changed that.”

“I love you too.” His lips are hesitant at first as they brush against mine before I draw him closer with a hand cupping his cheek. “Swear we won’t leave each other’s side ever again.” I grin “Till death do us part right?” he nods lips twitching into a small smile “Till death do us part.” I kiss him again deeper this time running my fingers through his hair while his dig into the front of my shirt pulling the two of us closer together. “This better not be a dream.” I chuckle tracing the star then the swallow tattooed on his neck “I promise its real.”

We remain together ignoring the rest of the crew who stare and whisper while we return to our previous position watching the water lapping the front of the boat while catching up on two years of tales more so from him than me catching me up on the strange crew, he has found himself with. Finally, we exhaust most topics and Izzy sighs heavily “They will want to talk to you.” I smile “I won you over, reckon I can deal with this lot.” His smile grows slightly before returning to his neutral expression “Let’s get this over with then.” We turn making our way to the centre deck the crew trying and failing to hide their curiosity. Ed saunters over grinning “You both look insanely happy. Hey, you got your ring back.” Izzy nods slightly tracing the silver band while Ed throws an arm around my shoulders “Everyone this is Y/N. Y/N this is my new crew, well our crew.” He grins at Stede “Lucius, Pete, John, Jim, Frenchie, Olowande, Roach, Swede, and Frenchie. You already know Ivan and Fang.” I nod slightly in greeting.

Olo waves while Swede looks confused “I thought they were dead.” I smile slightly “Nope.” Ivan grins “Good to have ya back.” Ed chuckles while Stede clumsily walks over stuttering over his words “Well then, how about you tell us a bit about yourself. We talk things through as a crew on this vessel. And I know I would like to know a bit more about you.” I frown “What’s there to know? I’m good with a sword, spent the last two years in a British jail cell, anyone hurts Izzy or my brother, and they get a knife in the gut.” Stede nods looking slightly alarmed “Right well I was thinking more along the lines of your favourite colour? Or perhaps hobbies?”

Izzy makes a sort of choked cough noise while I bite back a laugh “Your new to this aren't you?.” Stede beams “Yes, realatively. Now Roach is our resident cook and doctor, Izzy is first mate, Buttons is normally at the helm and Lucius is my scribe. I’m sure you will find your place soon enough; do you have any particular skills you feel may benefit the group?” Ed laughs “You kidding? They’re strong, fast, agile. Excellent with a sword and daggers, spent half their time up in the bloody rigging. Though two years out of action may have effected that.”

I grin reaching for one of my swords “Want to test that theory, Edward?” he draws his own sword spinning it artistically “Alright N/N.” Izzy sighs grumbling “You won’t beat them Ed.” I block every blow I may have been locked up for two years but that didn’t stop me from training in any way I could keeping up arm strength and agility. My muscles strain slightly but I grin putting more weight into my blows before knocking my brother to the ground sword pointed to his chest “Fuck. Really thought I could win that.” Grinning I haul him back to his feet “Don’t feel too bad about its Eddy.”

He groans rolling his eyes “Not that fucking name again.” I laugh clapping him on the back “Only if you piss me off, I promise.” The rest of the crew are grinning broadly while Ed claps me on the shoulder “So two years in prison ay?” I shrug eyes darkening “Don’t want to talk about it.”

“When did you get out?” I sigh running my thumb over my blade before sheathing it “Three days ago. I got to the coast this morning. Then you know the rest.” His face softens slightly “I’m sorry N/N.” I shrug brushing him off “It’s in the past, nothing you could have done. Just drop it.” he nods returning to his usual self “Well you catch up on some rest. Iz?” he nods motioning with his head, I follow into a small cabin immaculately tidy. A bunk along one wall just big enough for two, a writing desk, two storage chests and a small window “I kept all your stuff. Never could bring myself to getting rid of it.”

I turn pulling him into a tight hug the both of us dropping our shields “Thought of you every day.” He chuckles kissing me gently “I didn’t handle you leaving well.” I smile tugging of my jacket and laying it over the chair also removing my swords and boots “Let me guess you returned to your grouchy side.” He rolls his eyes “I’m always grouchy.” Laughing I sit on the bed pulling him down on top “Yea, but you have a grouchy side and then your super grouchy side. I know you Iz and I would have acted the same way.”

He sighs the two of us laying comfortably on the bed. He starts tracing the tattoos on my arms stopping at the largest on my bicep. An anchor with rope wrapped around it and a compass behind. “I remember when you got that.” I grin “Ed was acting all high and mighty that he got a tattoo so I had to get one that was bigger.” Izzy chuckles continuing up to my shoulder before moving to my other arm focusing on the inside of my wrist an anchor with roses wrapped around it “I regretted not getting mine more visible.”

I grin tracing the back of his shoulder blade where his own tattoo is etched. “We could get another one?” he laughs “Hmm maybe.” I shift slightly my shirt riding up “What’s that?” I freeze tugging my shirt back down “It’s nothing.” Sitting up he pushes my shirt back eyes turning cold as he examines the lines wrapping around my sides scars left from all the times the navy tried to get information out of me “Turn over.”

“Iz, I don’t think.” “Turn over.” slowly I turn almost glad I can’t see his expression as his fingers ghost over the skin. “I’m going to fucking kill them.” I turn back grabbing his hands “I’m okay Iz. I was worth more alive than dead, but they gave up trying to get information after eight months. ” I try and smile failing when Izzy looks so broken “Is your entire back…” I shrug “I have no idea. Probably. Could only see a small portion in the mirror.” Sighing I turn and pull of my shirt Izzy he traces up along the back “Fucking hell Y/N.”

“How’s my tattoo?” his hands freeze a chocked laugh coming from him “Sorry, just trying to make light of this.” His arms wrap tightly around my waist “I should have been there to protect you.” I relax into his warmth turning around so we are face to face. “Okay here’s what’s going to happen. We are going to move on from this, you are going to stop beating yourself up. I don’t blame you for anything. Look at me Iz,” he meets my eyes and I smile “Now pull yourself together. Neither of us are good with this sappy crap we can leave that to Ed and whatever him and the weird blonde have going on.”

A grin slowly spreads across his face “I don’t know what I did to deserve you Y/N Teach.” I grin rolling my eyes playfully “I love you Izzy Hands.” His mouth collides with mine the two of us falling back into the bed “We ever bump into the navy I’m slaughtering them all.” I grin kissing him again “If it makes you feel better, I already killed the two who did it.” He snorts kissing my cheek “Helps a little.” He flops onto my chest while I run my fingers through his hair.

3rd person P/O/V:

Ed walks out onto deck frowning “Anyone seen Iz?” the rest of the crew look around confused. Where is the angry man of a first mate? “Pete, Ivan? No one has seen him?”

“Nope.” “No.”

“Frenchie go check his cabin.” Frenchie nods and disappears below deck knocking gently on the door before peeking inside. Y/N and Izzy are sprawled on the bed in a tangle of limbs both sleeping soundly. Hastily Frenchie shuts the door and makes his way back to the deck “Both asleep captain.” Ed laughs “Sleeping? Really?” Stede smiles warmly “Well they have both been through rather a lot. Let’s leave them rest for a bit.”

[deskgirl]

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death Rating: General Main Characters: Wee John, Izzy Hands Setting: Post-season 2, "nobody dies/everybody lives" timeline

For the Izzy and Crew Event, a slice of life piece. I'm posting this here for now, but I'll upload to AO3 eventually.

Excerpt:

“What the fuck’s a leisure activity?” the man asked, growing more confused and frustrated.

“Stuff you like doing. Like having fancy drinks and blowing stuff up just for fun and telling people to fuck off when they’re wasting your time.” Wee John paused for emphasis, holding his drink aloft. “So fuck off.”

~

Sharing a Drink

~

A rum bottle flew across the crowded bar and shattered. Someone flung a chair in response. The gift of a thrown chair was clearly not appreciated as it was returned with equal force. A pistol went off, smoke pluming up from a third table totally uninvolved in the dispute but clearly annoyed by the disturbance. Rather than settling things, though, this only encouraged more thrown objects in more directions, a fair number of them sharp and pointy. This was generally ignored by everyone else in the bar as they were too busy getting drunk or cheating at cards.

Standard fare for a “den of iniquity,” as Stede liked to call these pirate-friendly dives. Or was it den of antiquity? Something like that. This particular den of inebriety had become the crew’s new favorite tavern until Jackie could get herself reestablished. In a lot of places, the beer was shit, but the bar here served decent stuff, barely watered down at all. The atmosphere was kind of bougie, but the prices weren’t bad and you hardly ever had to step over a dead body on your way to the outhouse. 

Wee John relaxed on a bench seat tucked against the wall, resting his back as he guarded the drinks the crew had left with him before scattering to the wind. John’s corner table provided a nice vantage point to watch the doors and his friends as they got up to their usual shenanigans. 

Frenchie and the Swede were doing something by the dice tables that would probably get them kicked out before the night was over, Jim was coaching a nervously laughing Oluwande through a game of darts against Archie and Zheng, and he thought he saw Lucius and Black Pete necking in the shadows by the coat rack. Zheng’s scary aunt had been here a minute ago, but John saw her slip out through the kitchen and knew better than to ask questions. 

“Whoa, look at you!” 

Wee John glanced sidelong at the man who’d staggered up to his table. He was about average as far as pirates went: a smattering of piercings, tasteful battle scar here and there, bit of gunpowder under the nails, short beard that needed a proper trim and oil, and a dusty leather jacket over what was probably the only shirt the man had to his name.

The unwanted visitor was also clearly deep in his cups, judging by his gaping expression and faint swaying. 

“Yer a big bastard,” the man continued. 

“That so?” Wee John asked as if it were news to him.

The other man paused, perplexed. “Yeah, mate.”

“You should see my brother. There’s a reason everyone calls me Wee John,” Wee John said, going back to sipping his drink. It was a fancy little thing in a narrow glass, orangey pink with a curl of grapefruit peel on top. He’d been feeling fancy when they all came in here riding high on their last raid, and nothing said fancy like a garnish. 

“I bet,” the other pirate laughed, dropping his hands to the table heavily. The crew’s drinks rattled and sloshed. “Let’s see what you can do, yeah? Arm wrestle, what’cha say?”

“No thanks. It’s my day off.”

“Your what?”

“My day off,” Wee John explained. “It’s like a mini vacation.”

“What’s a vacation?” 

“It’s a day when you don’t work. You’re supposed to do leisure activities.”

“What the fuck’s a leisure activity?” the man asked, growing more confused and frustrated.

“Stuff you like doing. Like having fancy drinks and blowing stuff up just for fun and telling people to fuck off when they’re wasting your time.” Wee John paused for emphasis, holding his drink aloft. “So fuck off.”

“You–!” The other man reared back, teeth bared, then lunged at Wee John. John distantly hoped that he’d come around the table instead of vaulting it. It’d be a real dick move if he knocked over everyone’s drinks. 

Suddenly the man went very still, his body hunched forward, arms out and shoulders stiff, all of his forward momentum halted by the feather-light touch of a blade at his throat. 

“I know you’re not fucking with my crew,” a familiar voice rasped from behind the drunk man. Izzy Hands stepped to the side and tilted his head so the unfortunate bastard could have a better look at who’d gotten the jump on him.

The drunk pirate’s eyes widened comically. “You’re…”

Izzy let the man flounder for a moment, clearly enjoying the recognition. “I am.” He eyed the other man up and down, taking his time, then sucked his teeth as if disappointed. God but he was a dramatic little shit. Wee John found it rather endearing now that it was being directed at someone else. 

“I didn’t know he was with you, Mr. Hands, I swear,” the man said. He still hadn’t moved and neither had Izzy’s knife. 

“That’s unfortunate,” Izzy said with a dash of fake sympathy. There was a long pause where John had the satisfaction of watching a fat drop of sweat roll down the man’s temple and into his beard. Then Izzy sniffed and slowly drew the blade away. “Luckily for you, I’m in an unusually good mood. Now, take my man Mr. Feeney’s advice and fuck off before I change my mind.” When the man continued to stand there, he made a shooing gesture with his knife.

As if an invisible cord had been cut, the man backpedaled wildly, bumped into someone behind him who spilled their beer and started swearing, then spun and ran off.

Izzy held himself tall for a moment longer before slowly deflating, leaning his hip against the table for support. Wee John recognized the signs of fatigue. The little man had pushed himself hard yesterday during the raid. Probably made himself sore the same as Wee John had with his back. 

“Hey,” Wee John called. When Izzy looked over, he patted the spot on the bench to his left.

Izzy hesitated before carefully shifting his weight and coming around the table. He startled when Wee John took hold of his elbow but didn’t protest the help as he eased himself down onto the bench. 

“Drink?” Wee John asked.

“You offering?” 

Wee John waved a hand at the table. “Crew’s offering.”

Izzy snorted softly as he perused the selection of abandoned drinks. After a bit of thought, he went for the half-tankard of ale. 

“Whose is this?” Izzy asked idly. He gave it a sniff before tipping it back to take a drink, not waiting for Wee John’s reply first.

“Archie’s,” Wee John said. “You know, I coulda handled that guy.”

“I know,” Izzy reassured as he wiped at the corners of his mouth with his thumb. “But like you said, it’s your day off. You’re not getting paid to work off the books so don’t bother.”

“That how you’re gonna play it?” Wee John gave his shoulder a squeeze. “You could just admit you like us, you stubborn little fucker.”

“I could also just jump in the bay.” 

Wee John chuckled. 

“Anyways, don’t act like I’ve done you any real favor.” Izzy gestured with his newly acquired tankard. 

When Wee John looked, he could see the drunk bastard who’d run off now sat at a table near the door and speaking heatedly to another man. He looked somewhat better kempt, with a long, red coat and dark hair tied at the nape of his neck. He was flanked by two bruisers who seemed intent on the conversation as well. 

“That’ll be his captain,” Wee John guessed. “They’re gonna jump us when we leave the bar.”

Izzy hummed in agreement.

“Should we tell the others? Leave out the back?”

Izzy eyed what was left in the tankard before throwing it back. He let out a satisfied sigh. “No need to ruin the crew’s fun. What’s a vacation without a bit of bloodshed?” 

“I don’t think you know what a vacation is.”

“Nope,” Izzy agreed. “Now pass me that drink with the lime wedge in it.”

[ladyluscinia]

Ok. Ok. Time to put my thoughts in order about S2 and we're starting at literally the first scene because whoo boy is there a lot going on that I like.

So. Stede's Fantasy Pirate Rescue aka this show having no illusions about Stede's fuck ups and where the story-driving conflict is coming from (*cough* Stede and Edward themselves *cough*)

It opens with what frankly a concerning amount of fandom seemed to view as the solution to all the problems of S1 - namely a Stede vs Izzy swordfight. Stede is really going all in on his dashing pirate hero fantasy. He has the beard. The sword skills. He gets his sword knocked out of his hand (again) but this time it ends on a witty one liner and stabbing Izzy with a concealed knife before artfully claiming his cutlass. He even dramatically kills him! And, villain defeated, there's Ed running through the surf to embrace him! Everything is perfect and wonderful and conflict free - and it all collapses back into reality with Wee John literally farting all over it.

Pete even openly mocks his moaning "Ed, Ed" in his sleep!

Because it's a fantasy! A ridiculous one at that! And the truly fantastical bit isn't even the reunion, or Stede's heroics. No... The part that's absurd, that even Stede can't make himself believe in his own subconscious mind, is that there's a convenient external villain to all of this and he and Ed can just pick back up where they left off.

Fantasy!Izzy and Fantasy!Ed are basically barbie dolls in this dream, but you can watch Stede's awareness that this is truly just a comforting fantasy slipping through.

Fantasy!Izzy gets cast as the villain because why wouldn't he? Stede has disliked him going back to that conversation at Spanish Jackie's where he basically offloaded a bunch of his own issues on this random pirate guy for having bad vibes, Izzy did betray him specifically to the Navy, and the last thing his crew would have been able to tell him about was Izzy ordering his stuff tossed and rowing them to an island (on Blackbeard's orders, but that's easy enough for Stede to ignore). He's even got him putting on a villain voice!

But the line. The only fantasy character line in this entire dream that connects with the situation in reality instead of sounding like stock NPC responses. Stede defeats his villain and The Villain / Fantasy!Izzy / Stede's subconscious looks up from his knees and reminds him:

"I never made you leave him. You did that yourself."

And Stede kills him for saying it! Goes back to the comforting script where he demands to know where Ed is and Izzy calls him a twat! Shut up, subconscious, Stede needs to rescue his damsel!

And his damsel barbie doll is so happy to see him! Fantasy!Edward's lines are the most disconnected, NPC babble. It's hilarious 🤣

Fantasy!Ed: "I knew you'd find me, babe"

Stede: "You're not mad?"

Fantasy!Ed: "I knew you'd find me, love"

Stede: "So we're good? About everything?"

Fantasy!Ed: "Fucking love the beard, mate".

Can I mention how much I love the repetition there? Zero engagement in the conversation, totally amps up the NPC vibe.

Stede is begging his own dream to reassure him that he didn't hurt Ed that bad, to tell him Ed will be so happy to see him it will fix everything, and he doesn't get what he's looking for. Because it's not true. The show in fact laughs in the face of that interpretation. Stede's making up a idealized "fix" (being a dashing hero) for the BlackBonnet relationship, and even Stede knows it's bullshit.

Edward and Stede's relationship issues and personal struggles have a bodycount this season (R.I.P. Ivan 😭) and it's immensely satisfying that so far no one is inclined to pull their punches on this fact or foist the blame elsewhere.

Not even Stede's subconscious!

[demiboydemon]

Weird Animal Crossing Headcanons!

Tom Nook used to be married to Redd, now is dating KK Slider. He used to just have a crush on him, but after KK came to the island they got drunk on vacation juice and hooked up in the closed Able Sisters’ changing room, and other places after Sable caught them and kicked them out. The next morning, they talked about it and decided to take things slow. After meeting up every Saturday for a few months, they put labels on things. Timmy and Tommy who were so glad to see their Dad/Uncle happy, even though Tom Nook had to make up a sfw story about how they got together.

Redd is single, but still likes Tom Nook. He’s scornful and jealous that Tom has moved on. He always hopes that he will see him in his boat and want him back. It hasn’t worked yet, but he’s hoping if he keeps selling fake art, Tom will get mad enough to talk to him. Recently he came to tell Redd that he was welcome to sell his art on the regular part of the island as long as he didn’t claim the forgeries were real, but Redd told him to go fuck himself.

Blathers is married to Brewster. It was hard being long distance so Brewster decided to move to the island, too. Sometimes Blathers is self-conscious about how much he talks, but Brewster finds it adorable. Sometimes a family is a bird who talks too much and a bird who doesn’t talk enough.

Harvey, Harriet, Leif, and Pascal are in a polyamorous relationship with each other. Harvey and Harriet got together first, then they met Pascal and Leif. Harriet isn’t dating Pascal, but they are good friends. They’re currently a closed polycule.

Flick and CJ are dating. They were childhood best friends, then got together as teens. Now they live together in a 2 bedroom apartment. One of the bedrooms belongs to the bugs and fish. Flick doesn’t talk to his dad much, and people assume it’s because he’s homophobic. Really it’s because Nat loves eating bugs. Another example of politics destroying families 😔

Pelly moved on from Pete after she caught him pirating content from Phyllis’s Onlyfans. She’s now with a pelican named Pierre, who is a Boondoxian. Pierre is scared of Phyllis, as everyone should be.

Gracie is friends with benefits with Pavé and Resetti. She’s a dom and they’re into that.

Dr Shrunk’s wife wanted to open up their marriage and he agreed, but now regrets it. He talked to Dr Shrunk (his wife) about his regrets and she told him she wanted a divorce. He is having a midlife crisis, and now the only reactions he can teach are ‘heartbreak,’ ‘hefty child support,’ and ‘look at my exotic tattoo.’ This is why he is absent in New Horizons, as Nintendo didn’t think these reactions would be profitable. (Geez, show the man some compassion.)

Ankha is taking a break from dating after someone leaked her nudes. She went on a coffee date with Wisp once, but he was too much of a scaredy-cat for her.

Don Resetti has a crush on Beppe at OK Motors. They don’t see each other much, but every time they do is magical. A scrapped part of New Horizons was the player setting them up on a date in exchange for bells, but Nintendo decided against it.

Reese and Cyrus are happy as ever, and are that couple you mute on social media because they make you feel bad about your own love life.

Franklin used to have a Tinder, but deleted it after he only got messages from vore roleplayers. Speed dating hasn’t worked out well for him, either.

Gillivarr has an unrequited crush on Celeste. Celeste is the unrequited crush of many, many people.

Wardell and Niko are in a committed relationship after working together for years. Digby and Lottie had to make amendments to the HHA rule book because they were sick of the PDA.

Lloid is well-endowed, but he still has a difficult time with dating because it’s made of clay, and no size in the world can make up for that.

[teatyryn]

hahha wow lonely freddy protag no way i was going to post the body sheet or whatever for pete but then I finished and decided it didn't look like how i wanted.

anyways look now we have chuck!!!! though i might change it up like give him nerd glasses cause he gives me the vibes and i think it's cute.

I can't believe that their last names are DINGLEWOOD though. Alec sort of came off as pouty to me LMAO idk… bratty <3

I want to believe Pete would possess Foxy since the lyrics of the song are all abt being a pirate but I'm delusional and that would also kind of suck since in like a stitchwraith epilogue an agony-infected Foxy gets smushed in the trash compactor so maybe not.

Fazbear frights siblings are like tragic. or at least these two are bc alec was definitely an ass but like right when he wants to be better it just goes downhill LOL. I always thought pete was alright as a sibling before the parent divorce. though that's my interpretation since nothing confirms he was bad before he started getting frustrated and having to take care of his brother and also just quitting football. ALSO,, wasn't he getting made fun of when he tripped during that one frog dissection scene and they kept whispering about him getting kicked from the football team. like he supposedly has friends but he never talks to them???

Is there a confirmed timeline for the fazbear frights stories? It's implied at the end of Step Closer that Foxy disappeared after 4 weeks and that was when the stitchwraith took it to be crushed like all the other agony-infected things.

Okay but it's all agreed that the step closer ending hit like a truck... ha. it was so sudden

[larphis]

My overtly dramatic but realistic prediction for the OFMD S2 pearl necklace:

After Stede and Ed make up, their freshly reestablished bond is (understandbly so) very fragile because Ed still carries a lot of the hurt from that night on the beach with him.

Stede, seeing how horribly he hurt the man that he loves, decides to come up with a plan and tells Ed that the crew and him will do some “lame robbery” to earn some money back and that Ed should just stay in the cabin because it wouldn’t excite him anyways and he should better use that time to rest and to get some energy back.

In reality Stede drags the crew into a fancy jewlery store and asks them for help to pick out something fancy because of Ed’s love for fine things.

The crew being absolutely done (because let’s be real “picking out apology jewlery for your captain’s boyfriend who left you out to die” really wasn’t part of the job description) just points at all kinds of stuff in hopes of going back to the ship as soon as possible.

However, Stede - being the extra person he is - feels like nothing is good enough for his beloved until he sees the pearl necklace and his eyes light up.

The crew looks very sceptical and asks their captain if he is sure that that is really something that Edward, Blackbeard, would like; but Stede is 100% convinced (“It’s perfect”).

So they steal the necklace (“I am sorry gentlemen, I wish I could pay you for your services but I’m doing this in the name of love!”) and head back to the ship.

When Stede arrives, Edward is already standing on deck and skeptically but curiously comes up to see what they gathered from the “lame robbery” - Izzy is right by his side and looks as pissed as ever.

While the crew already prepares to be thrown of the ship a second time, Stede hides the necklace behind his back and starts with a speech that probably goes something like:

“Ed, I know how much I’ve hurt you but I wanted you to know that I am so thankful to have been given a second chance by you and that I really don’t take any of this for granted.

And to honor that, I, with the help of the crew, picked out this fine piece of jewlery to remind you of the fact that you are worthy of beautiful things and how much I really meant it when I told you that I loved you”

Edward very slowly takes the pearl necklace out of Stede’s hands and looks at it with an unreadable expression - which in turn makes Izzy grin with pride:

“You are such a miserable creature, Bonnet. Did you really think that you could make someone like Blackbeard, the most cruel pirate to have ever lived, forgive you by gifting him a woman’s necklace?!”

“I love it”

“Exactly! He- WHAT?!”

Ed’s eyes are watery and still focused on the necklace as he quietly repeats himself:

“I love it”, he says, hesitates, but then walks up to Stede and kisses him on the cheek, “thank you” he adds and starts blushing.

(“Most cruel pirate to have ever lived” repeats Black Pete meanwhile under his breath with an obvious eyeroll, which earns him an elbow from Lucius)

Stede finally feels the tension leave his body and manages to shyly reply “no, thank you” with a smile that mirrors Ed’s.

Izzy only manages to hiss “I’m too old for this shit” as he turns on his heel and walks off.

But Ed honored the symbol of their renewed love and never went anywhere without the necklace again.

[theofficialpresidentoftheusa]

Okay here’s a whole post with my thoughts/theories about how the next two episodes and the finale are going to play out, using BTS footage, reviewer’s comments, and the promo. My attempt at piecing together an entire timeline for the rest of the season, basically. (Though pretty much focused on Ed + Stede’s plot)

Major spoilers, obviously, especially for the finale (though it’s mostly theory, but there’s some very spoilery BTS pictures)

So, starting with episode 6, we’ll be getting either a Pete/Lucius wedding or some kind of party. With the title being “Calypso’s birthday”, I think the party theme and the prior lupete proposal could be a red herring for a wedding, and it could be just a party for the sake of a party. Calypso could be wee John’s drag name, rather than a yet to be named character (and in that sense maybe it’s more along the lines of ‘the birth of calypso’ for the title) Who knows. Anyways. Some kind of party, that we then see interrupted by Ned Lowe, who begins to torture the crew for breaking his record of most ships hit in a day or what have you.

Now from reviews we’ve been told that Blackbeard is not the one who ultimately saves the crew, and it is in fact stede who steps up and averts a crisis. I think this is what begins stede’s newfound infamy, defeating or at least stopping the torture of his crew from this famous pirate.

With his open wound, it needs to be cauterized, hence this scene:

Followed by these two hooking up, with stede having a confidence high, and them just completely giving into their horniness of averting a near-death situation:

I mean, the wall slam, the next morning half nude bed scene, it’s a given. It’s happening. No doubt. 100% sure of it.

As far as how or why they end up at Spanish Jackie’s, for episode 7, “Man on Fire” I dunno. I think a review summary said they’re just chilling. Not really there with any intent. And with stede’s defeat of Ned and his other stories building him infamy, he has groupies and fans now.

Which i think begins to build this divide between him and Ed. Being as Ed is probably looking at retiring from the pirate life, and stede is really just starting at it, I think they’re going to come to some kind of impasse by the finale.

Regardless, before the season began all the reviewers had was up to the 7th episode, and everyone mentioned how it ended on a cliffhanger. And I think the cliffhanger will be this-

Based on the explosions, fire, and mass panic scenes that we have seen from here:

And here:

I think prince Ricky will be launching an all out attack on the republic of pirates, probably taking out several of zheng’s ships (likely with those suspicious ass clocks). Here is where stede and Ed will be separated, and the episode will leave us with them apart. (Possibly thinking the other is dead? Though we’ve had a LOT of near deaths this season so. Maybe not)

I think it could be a fight between the two about their diverging paths that separates them, leading to Ed back on the ship and Izzy’s “frowny face” line and him once again being a mediator for Ed and Stede’s relationship

Part of why I think they’ll be separated is that it’s the only logical reason why they would have a reunion scene in the finale (which is called “Mermen” I believe?)

Where stede looks up to see Ed on the opposite side of the fight:

Quite possibly this scene, of Ed emerging from the ocean:

And they fight their way to each other:

And embrace:

And save Zheng:

And team up with her

Now I get murky on the rest here, but they probably come up with some kind of counter attack plan where they infiltrate Ricky’s/ the English army, and take it down from the inside.

See Ed here in what looks like English army clothes, as well as Frenchie and black Pete on the side in outfits as well, and the other shot of frenchie and Lucius.

And from this plan, which I do believe succeeds in some regard, we get a ‼️‼️ major character death

And I think (SPOILER SPOILER SPOLIER‼️) it’s Izzy. He’s the only one not pictured (except for wee john), Jim is giving some kind of eulogy:

And everyone begins to walk away EXCEPT ed and stede, who remain looking down.

Unfortunately it narratively makes sense as well to have Izzy, who started as a purely selfish character, become someone who would sacrifice himself for his newfound family. PLUS it being a parallel to last season, where he gave them up to the English. I don’t like it, but it does make sense. It hits the hardest, too. And reviews of the finale have said it hits hard emotionally.

As far as how we’ll leave off, I have this feeling that Ed may stay behind and stede may go off to continue pirating. I just don’t see how they can stay together with their warring desires at the moment. But it’s not going to be an end to their relationship, I just think they’re going to try to both do their own thing. To have them choose to be apart yet together, instead of forcibly apart like where we ended last season, it just feels like something David would do. And it really would show them being secure in their relationship, allowing them to develop themselves outside of each other and come into their own on their own terms.

This scene in particular makes me feel like this is them talking about Ed staying, and possibly even fixing up this house for them while Stede goes out to pirate.

Ed is stede’s lighthouse to come back to. I’m seeing fuckin parallels to pirates of the Caribbean with Elizabeth and will. Maybe we’ll get stede choosing Ed over piracy, especially with the end of the golden age of piracy looming, and his desire to build a life together instead of building his reputation but. That’s just my wishful thinking.

[something-about-sunflowers]

Hot take: The people who are STILL insisting that Izzy is homophobic (despite the NUMEROUS instances of the cast/crew/David himself saying that nobody on the show is being targeted for their identity and ‘it’s not “I can’t believe he’s with a guy” but “I can’t believe he’s with THAT guy”‘ ad nauseam) towards Stede, Lucius, or Ed (I don’t believe I’ve seen anyone say anything about Fang or Pete, though I could be wrong, but I’m gonna touch on that in a bit too*)? They’re, unironically, being homophobic by stereotyping the characters and reducing them to just their sexuality.

If you recognize that Stede is a multifaceted character and you recognize the ways in which he is multifaceted - He’s a man born into wealth and raised on classist, colonialist ideals. Yes, he’s also traumatized by how he was treated by his father and peers but trauma doesn’t exempt people from blame when participating in, embracing, enforcing, and benefiting from classist and colonialist ideals - you will understand that Izzy is not being homophobic towards him just because he hates him.

If you only view Stede as a gay man and ignore everything else about his character then the only motivation for Izzy to hate him MUST be because he’s a gay man and therefore Izzy MUST be homophobic.

If you recognize that Lucius is a multifaceted character and you recognize the ways in which he is multifaceted - He’s a man who likely was born into some level of the middle class, given that he can read and write (It’s also possible that he was born into a working class family and he learned to read and write there, but it’s the unlikely option by default. None of the rest of the working class crew know how to read or write save Jim who was raised by a nun and would have been taught by her.), he also avoids doing work which is necessary for the function of the ship that they live on and depend on for their livelihoods and encourages the rest of the crew to do the same with his insubordination. He’s also in an unorthodox relationship that people who have not experienced the concept of consensual non-monogamy would not understand and might interpret as cheating - you will understand that Izzy is not being homophobic towards him just because he hates him.

If you only view Lucius as a gay man and ignore everything else about his character then the only motivation for Izzy to hate him MUST be because he’s a gay man and therefore Izzy MUST be homophobic.

If you recognize that Ed is a multifaceted character and you recognize the ways in which he is multifaceted - He’s a man of color, born into a working class family who worked hard to make a name for himself, to the point where he did not have to endanger himself or his crew to earn their livelihoods. He’s also some level of neurodivergent and understimulated by the environment he’s in (because he excels at his job) which leads him to make irrational and dangerous decisions and puts the lives of himself and his crew in danger. He’s also been making increasingly out of character decisions (corroborated by Fang and Ivan) by the influence of Stede - you will understand that Izzy is not being homophobic towards him just because he’s angry about his relationship with Stede.

If you only view Ed as a gay man and ignore everything else about his character then the only motivation for Izzy to be angry about his relationship with Stede (and only Stede, because he had no qualms about Ed and Calico Jack’s involvement with one another given that he sent Jack to get Ed out of the way of the English, but that’s another post I don’t have the spoons to make) MUST be because he’s a gay man and therefore Izzy MUST be homophobic.

If you IGNORE that Izzy is a multifaceted character and you IGNORE the ways in which he is multifaceted - He’s a gay (we’re not having this argument) working class man who earned his high ranking position on an extremely respectable pirate’s crew. He’s capable and is rightfully angry when he’s looked down on because of his class. He recognizes the importance of ship maintenance and is rightfully angry when those tasks are ignored. He doesn’t understand Lucius’ relationship dynamic and thinks he can use (what he thought was) him cheating on his partner (seriously, how is ‘I’m going to tell the man you were fucking that you were fucking another man’ threatening to out him?) as a motivation to make him do the necessary ship work. He is rightfully angry when his orders are ignored because he’s the highest authority on the ship next to the captains. He is in love with Ed and is jealous because Ed is in love with Stede - you can pretend that Izzy is homophobic because of how he behaves towards the other gay men on the ship.

If you ignore that Izzy has valid reasons for his actions (which does not mean that the actions are all entirely justified) then the only motivation for them MUST be because he’s homophobic.

(* The persistent neglect of Fang and Pete in these discussions is also rooted in homophobia. Fang and Pete are the only explicitly gay men on the ship who don’t, at any point, present ‘femininely’** and therefore don’t fall so easily into the bubble of the stereotypical gay man and so they get ignored in these discussions because they aren’t suitable to push the narrative that Izzy only interacts negatively towards ‘feminine’/’gnc’** gay men.)

(** The insistence that Stede, Lucius, and Ed are in any way, at any point, LEGITIMATELY presenting ‘femininely’ or are ‘gender non-conforming’ is ALSO rooted in homophobia - and I’d argue a touch of racism via Ed’s hair and beard as they relate to his indigenous roots. The assumption/association with those three being considered feminine comes from their identity as gay men. That is homophobia.

Stede wears men’s clothes. He wears RICH men’s clothes. Bright, colorful, patterned fabrics are worn by RICH men in the 1700s - if you want to argue that, say, king George presented femininely or was gnc because of the way he dressed be my guest but you won’t because he doesn’t and he isn’t. Lucius wears men’s clothes. His clothes are perfectly at place amongst the rest of the crew’s clothes. Ed wears men’s clothes. His leather is in direct relation to gay leather-men which is a hyper-masculine aesthetic in the same way drag is - typically - a hyper-feminine aesthetic. His appreciation for Stede’s clothes comes from the wealth and privilege that centers around the easy possession of those types and quantities of fabrics.

None of them behave in ways that are stereotypically feminine. Having and expressing emotions is not a uniquely or inherently feminine trait. Caring for and maintaining your appearance is not a uniquely or inherently feminine trait. Even if they were, Izzy also does those things. Izzy frequently expresses his emotions - yes, anger, a stereotypically ‘masculine’ emotion, but others as well. He also puts a great deal of care into his appearance, aside from the materials, the only difference between his and Stede’s outfits are the type of shoes and the presence of a jacket. If those traits are to be considered inherently feminine then it is disingenuous to not apply that label to Izzy as well.)

[house-afire]

you can have a little revenge, as a treat (Izzy/Lucius)

(tw: references to noncon)

Izzy knew Lucius was tailing him back to his cabin. He didn’t stay so close it was stupid—more like a nervy cat’s way of following than a puppy’s—but he was still as subtle as a cannonball. He wasn’t surprised when there was a knock half-a-minute after he got inside.

“I’d say ‘fuck off,’ but you don’t like listening, do you?”

The door creaked open. “Did you know it was me, or is that just, like, how you greet people?”

“It can be both.”

“Fair.” Lucius slipped in and sat down, like he’d had a real invitation. He gave Izzy a fierce, almost angry look. “I asked Pete to be my matelot.”

He didn’t know what he’d expected this to be about, but it sure as fuck wasn’t this. “And you came to me for congratulations?”

“Uh, no. I can see why that would be weird, if I’d done that. No, I want to—” He pressed his lips together. Turned out that was one last bolstering-up of the dam before he kicked it to pieces. “Stede doesn’t want to listen to what happened to me after Blackbeard pushed me overboard, and he said I shouldn’t tell Pete every dark little detail, either. And he was right. It’s a lot, and I shouldn’t … track filth around. But if I don’t tell someone about it, I’m going to lose my fucking mind. You’re not squeamish, and you won’t cry over me.”

That glare of his, Izzy saw now, had just a hint of desperation to it.

He’d never talked about anything more than he’d had to—swallowed it all down like his fucking toes—but he had, as the whole cursed lot of them knew by now, sicked up enough before to know that it could help. And if you were going to spew, better to do it in private.

“Fine,” Izzy said.

Lucius boggled at him for a moment, like a fish pulled out of the water, and then said, “Right, I expected that to be a lot harder.”

He sat down on the other end of the bed, as far from Izzy as he could get. Crossed his legs and uncrossed them, scowling at his knees like they’d betrayed him. He fixed his gaze somewhere over Izzy’s shoulder.

“I went between a lot of ships, after I got picked up. Wasn’t really by choice, not after the first … first bad one. A good ship—a good ship will let you leave, and you don’t know until it’s too late that if they’ll let you go, you might be … might be better off staying. I should never have left the first berth I got. They only wanted me as a whore, but that’s not so bad, is it? I mean, you’d probably say that’s most of what I did around here anyway.”

His gaze flickered over to Izzy like he expected him to laugh or nod. Izzy didn’t do either: you didn’t fuck about when you could see there was a storm on the horizon.

“Okay. Fine. Be understanding, like that’s not creepy.” He shifted around again, fidgeting like his own skin wasn’t enough to keep together, like he had to hold on to himself. “The other ships were all worse. I thought most pirates were—”

“Like Bonnet?” Izzy said incredulously.

“Like you,” Lucius said. “I thought the worst I’d have to contend with would be a whole ship of Izzy Hands, and I’d just be annoyed and stressed or, fine, dead, but in a—normal way. But you never—you wouldn’t—”

He dug his fingers into his arms. He’d wind up with bruises from it.

“The worst ship was called Dead Man’s Folly. And they had a little dog named Pepper, and they liked having puppet shows in the evenings, and I just fucking need—somebody—to fucking listen.”

Izzy didn’t know the details yet, but the puppet shows were a cursed enough notion for him to tell the outline of it already. Nothing curdled like whimsy; nothing was worse when it turned dark.

He listened. And as Lucius told him all of it, he stowed away a few things in particular.

Dead Man’s Folly. Captain Graves.

***

It took another fortnight—and a through-gritted-teeth request about it to Bonnet, who was so shocked Izzy would ask him for a favor that he gave in at once—but Izzy saw to it that they made one of the Dead Man’s Folly’s regular ports of call.

“I never had the impression you were all that enamored of shore leave,” Bonnet said, watching as Izzy scanned the ships crowded into the bay. “Care to share your holiday plans?”

Izzy’s lips flexed, hard, as he found the flag he was looking for. “Not responsible for what you don’t know about,” he said. “Better to leave it.”

“If you’re looking for trouble, you ought to have company!”

“Not for this,” Izzy said. “You’d approve, at least in theory, but you won’t want to see it. It won’t be very … gentlemanly.”

Bonnet looked crestfallen, but he said, “Well, if that’s what you think, I suppose I agree. I—trust you, Izzy. God, never thought I’d be saying that.”

“It’s weird, isn’t it?” Izzy said.

“It is a bit weird, yeah. Nice, though.”

Almost against his will, Izzy said, “Yeah, it’s nice.” He cleared his throat. “Keep Lucius and Black Pete on the ship, even if everyone else goes to shore for the night. I don’t know, throw them a fucking engagement party.”

Bonnet brightened. “I have been meaning to do that, you know. Of course, you can’t plan a proper celebration in one night, but—”

“Whatever,” Izzy said, putting his foot into the rigging and starting down. It took more presence of mind to do this these days, but it wasn’t so bad once you got used to it. “Just no cake.”

“Yes, I think we all learned our lessons on the cake front. Have no fear! Roach is a pastry virtuoso. There doesn’t exist a confection that he can’t master.”

Perfect. A night of sugar and blood. Captured their lives here pretty well, really.

***

It wasn’t hard to find the Dead Man’s Folly. Ships captained by assholes always made themselves known sooner or later.

Some of Bonnet’s luck must have rubbed off on him, because he got the sweetest of chances: all hands in port for the night, and just Graves and his first mate aboard.

Easiest thing in the world for Izzy to hail them, plain and simple, and get welcomed on. The first mate didn’t even ask him his business, though he found it out in a hurry. Izzy didn’t make a meal out of that one: it was Graves he’d come here for, Graves who had been the rotten core of Lucius’s story.

Graves, who was drinking the night away in his cabin.

He wasn’t completely soused yet, which was good. Izzy wasn’t going to give him a chance to retrieve his sword or pistol—he was here to murder, not raiding or dueling; the usual rules of the profession didn’t apply—but he wanted him sober. He wanted Graves to know what he was paying for.

“Who the fuck are you?”

“Curious passerby,” Izzy said. “My ship dropped anchor here, same as yours, and I’d heard so many rumors about the fearsome Captain Graves that I had to come myself to see what was what.”

The fact that Graves didn’t immediately blink at him and ask if he was taking the piss was a marvel and a half. As far as Izzy was concerned, the only pirate worth that kind of slobbery adulation was Edward himself—and Edward had tired of it a long time ago.

“What rumors would those be?” Graves said, hungry for any morsel of a reputation.

“I heard,” Izzy said, “that you picked up a pretty little piece of one-time jetsam a while back.”

Graves earned himself an even slower death by not even being able to fucking remember at first, like he fished bitchy scribes out of the sea every week at least.

“Oh,” Graves said, comprehension finally dawning on him. “Rat Boy. I wouldn’t go as far as pretty.”

Fucking hell, at this rate, Izzy was going to have to spend most of the fucking year killing this prick.

“Rat Boy. That’s the one.” He gave Graves a smile that would’ve sent a smarter man running. “Heard something about a bit of puppetry too, I think. Sounded … inventive.”

Graves, not content with all previous acts of wanton fucking stupidity, took this compliment at face value too. “Keeps the crew entertained on the slow nights. Everybody loves a good show.”

“Yeah? You come up with that yourself, then?”

Graves spread out his hands. “I’m a great innovator, unrecognized in my time.”

“Oh, I bet recognition’s right on its way,” Izzy said. “Nipping at your heels. You really got your whole hand up his arsehole, then.”

“He squirmed, but in it went,” Graves said, wiggling his fingers.

“You like that, watching him squirm? Wouldn’t go so far as to call him pretty, no, but you liked how he looked with you wrist-deep in his arse and making a show of him? Liked having him catch rats with his teeth? You must have. Liked it so well you didn’t even call him by his right name. Do you know it?”

It was, to Izzy’s great pleasure, finally starting to dawn on Graves that Izzy hadn’t really come here to have a wank to his great ingenuity. He stared at Izzy, the damp whites of his eyes looking like Roach’s poached eggs.

“My first mate is right up on deck—”

“He is. All over the deck, you might say.” Izzy leaned back in his chair. “Now, him I didn’t have much of a conversation with, so he didn’t have a chance to make things worse for himself. Just as dead as you’re going to be, though. Had it coming too, because a first mate’s responsible for everything that happens on his ship.”

Graves stared up at the ceiling, like blood was going to start dripping down right on cue. Izzy hoped he had a vivid picture of what all over the deck could mean. He gave Graves time to think about it. Then some more time to think about how much worse Izzy might do to the man who’d just been running his mouth about being the brains behind the human fucking puppet.

“I’ll make you a deal,” Izzy said, drawing his sword and laying it across his knees. “If you can come up with his name, I won’t cram a fat bilge rat down your sorry throat until you choke on it. I don’t really want to go looking for one anyway. This is going to take enough time as it is.”

Graves was sputtering now, like he was trying to save Izzy the rat-finding trouble by choking on his own spit first. “But he—he—”

“Made it back to his own ship.”

“He couldn’t have,” Graves insisted. “He—he said his captain there threw him overboard!”

“I’m not his fucking captain,” Izzy said. “Come up with that name yet?”

Graves’s pulse was fluttering in his throat, rapid as a lady’s fan. Thinking so hard beads of sweat were popping out on his brow: the great innovator at work.

“J—John.”

“Reasonable gamble,” Izzy allowed. “Thing is—it’s not right by even a letter.”

He ran Graves through, pinning him to his fancy chair; rapped the hilt with two fingers and set it to quivering in Graves’s belly. The screams were easy enough to ignore. Just part of the mess, like the blood.

He’d intended to make Lucius Spriggs the last thing Graves ever heard, but it seemed like Lucius’s name deserved better than being dragged back into this room with all its filth. Stupid thought, but there it was.

Instead, he said, “S’pose it doesn’t matter. Saw a dead rat right outside—seems a shame to waste it.” He hadn’t, but he figured Graves deserved to die with that thought in his head. And one more for good measure: “I’m not much for imagination; save that for the captains of the world. But I do work out how to make the fucking plans happen, even yours. The way I see it, all I have to do is cut your hand off—” He tapped a dagger blade against each of Graves’s wrists. “And then I can shove it up your arse. Put on a puppet show just the way you like.”

“You can’t do this,” Graves said. Blood was already hitting his lips as he whined, which meant he was dying faster than Izzy would like, and the bastard was too fucking dimwitted to know it.

Aided in the fuckery, at least.

“Oh, you’ll squirm, but in it’ll go,” Izzy told him. “You said as much yourself. It’ll be slick enough with your own blood, that ought to make it easier.”

He let Graves wriggle and bleed for another few minutes, but there wasn’t any satisfaction to it once the man was well and truly out of his head. Nothing to be gained by hurting a dumb animal. Izzy cut his throat to finish him off.

He stood there a while, breathing in the scent of blood. (And shit. He bet Bonnet’s tales of piracy never talked about how often dying men shit themselves.) He hadn’t paid Graves back for even what the fucker had done to Lucius, but there was revenge and then there was fucking monstrosity. He’d had enough of the latter to last him a lifetime.

Mutilating a corpse, though—that was run-of-the-mill pirate shit, honestly.

“Not saying he’ll make you the centerpiece of the fucking wedding,” he said to Graves’s body, “because he’s still a bit too soft for it, even after what your lot did to him. Which is almost fucking impressive. But he is, God help me, enough of a pirate to appreciate a token.”

Not the head. You walked through port swinging a man’s severed head like a sack of fucking apples, you wound up having to talk about it. Hand wouldn’t attract nearly as much attention—stray hands were as common around here as the pox—but Lucius wouldn’t want one. Not with where Graves’s had been. Fucking reminder, not a proper keepsake. Foot? He glanced down at his hoof—smiled a bit—and then scoffed. Jesus Christ, if he took Graves’s foot, Twatty would never fucking shut up about how interesting it must be inside Izzy’s head. He’d grow old and die before he heard the end of it.

Ear, he decided. Graves had been thoughtful enough to wear some gaudy emeralds there, might as well make use of it.

He sawed off the left one; it had a bit missing off the top, tapering to a lump of scar tissue, so between that and the fucking jewels, it’d be plain enough who it belonged to.

He spat on Graves’s body, before he went.

***

Frenchie was playing his lute when Izzy got back, and he shot Izzy a shy smile and plucked the first few notes of the tune he’d somehow gotten in his head was Izzy’s favorite. He raised his eyebrows.

Izzy waved him off—don’t change it on my account—and Frenchie drifted back to the other song.

Unbefuckinglievable that he’d somehow wound up with a life where people cared what fucking music he wanted. Fucking smiles and moonlight.

And a man’s ear in his pocket. Couldn’t say he’d ever had that before either, strictly speaking. Not as such.

Sugar and blood, he thought.

He found Lucius tucked up in Black Pete’s arms, listening to the music. Little fucker had always been bold as brass when it came to lazing about, never one to spring into action, but this was a new development, this melting back into his boyfriend’s chest and fucking relaxing more as Izzy came close.

Lucius looked up at him through his eyelashes. “Joining us?”

“Oh, get up,” Izzy said, nudging at him with the toe of his boot. “I’ve got a … matelotage gift for you. Just you, not him.”

“Well, color me intrigued,” Lucius said. He twisted around enough to press a kiss to Black Pete’s lips. “Save my seat.”

“Of course! And if he’s giving you what I think he’s giving you, babe, you’re gonna have to let me know if he put a bow on it first.”

They made it around to a quiet side of the deck—as private as anything ever got, with a ship this unwholesomely chummy—and Lucius flicked his gaze downwards and says, “Does it have a bow on it? I’ve always liked unwrapping presents.”

“For fuck’s sake.” Izzy reached into his pocket and pulled out the handkerchief-swaddled ear. It still felt warm. “Here.”

“I swear,” Lucius murmured, “the number of otherwise lovely gifts I get with blood all over them ….” He unfolded the handkerchief and his breath caught in his throat. He stared down at it. “This is—his.”

Izzy nodded.

“That’s what you did tonight. You went out and cut a man’s ear off for me.”

“Killed him too,” Izzy said. “And the first mate.”

“Killed. You walked onto another pirate ship, killed its officers, and brought me back an ear.” Lucius tugged roughly at the earring, like he was half-tempted to tear through the earlobe and yank it free. “How did you even get away with that alive?”

Izzy shrugged. “They’d given the crew shore leave. Otherwise I would’ve had to settle for just the captain, and it would’ve been trickier. Easy enough as it was.”

Lucius wrapped the handkerchief up again. His fingers were shaking. “And here I had this whole vastly symbolic shark telling me I had to move on.”

“You are moving on,” Izzy said. “Or did you miss where it was a fucking wedding present? You’ve got Pete. You’re not sulking about the ship anymore, letting your whole life fester. You fucking talked it out, like you’re Bonnet Jr. You’ve just got some bastard’s ear now too, little piece for the mantel.”

Lucius took a deep breath and then said, “Don’t stab me, because it will so ruin the moment,” and leaned in fast and pressed his lips to Izzy’s cheek. The touch was light and warm. “This is honestly one of the sweetest things anyone’s ever done for me.”

“Fuck off,” Izzy said, even if it took a moment or two too long. His face felt hot. “It’s a severed ear, not a bunch of flowers.”

“I love it.”

“Yeah.” There was more open appreciation in his voice than he’d meant to put there. “Figured you were enough of a bloodthirsty little shit for it.”

“Speaking of which—you’re not … expecting me to cut off Blackbeard’s ear for you, are you?”

“You couldn’t give him so much as a fucking haircut,” Izzy said.

“I know that, but I figured I should, you know, offer.”

“Mm. You didn’t quite, though.”

“I said that I knew I should,” Lucius said. “That’s almost the same thing. I’m self-aware.”

Izzy snorted, and Lucius smiled—victorious and alive and prettier than fucking Graves could have ever fucking hoped to be.

“Don’t tell me you commit glorious, bloody acts of heroism for all the boys,” he said, slipping the bundled-up handkerchief into his pocket. “I don’t need to be a one-and-only, but I still like to feel special.”

He wasn’t quite a one-and-only, Izzy thought, looking over towards the stern, where the ship’s captains and her company was lounging about listening to their moonlit music and probably fiddling with their own beloved severed ears. But he was one of just a few. And special wasn’t the worst word for it, if Izzy were going to talk about it, which he absolutely fucking wasn’t.

“Oh,” Lucius said quietly, following his gaze. “I can certainly work with that.” He kissed Izzy again, on the mouth this time, even more softly than before. It hit Izzy like a kind of slow lightning strike and left him tingling. “Come and sit with us? God, that would be something. One valiant defender of my honor on either side. And Frenchie will play that song he’s absolutely convinced you like.”

“Don’t know why he thinks that,” Izzy said, following Lucius, “but I might be coming around on it.”