#his max boost laugh gives me joy

[roaldseth]

You see, I have two hands. One is for hunting. One is for fishing. I am taking them both to a Cabela's.

[sunrizef1]

Baby Blue

Pairing: Logan Sargeant x fem!reader

Warnings: Slight cursing, not edited

Word count: 3.8k (this was supposed to be short 😭)

Summary: Logan had just misspoke, shouldnt have been a huge problem, right? Wait, what do you mean he said he had a daughter? And is that his girlfriend?

Authors Note: Surpise, not a whiv chapter but instead, an uncharacteristically sweet fic.

Logan had fucked up. Royally. And he knew that, which is why, the second the words had left his mouth, he was grimacing, gaze quickly switching over to Oscar who was sat a few yards away with wide eyes.

It was the United States Grand Prix. Austin, Texas. Logan had been put on the media panel that day since he was the only American present and had the most connection to Austin, Daniel Ricciardo not included.

By pure luck or maybe by sheer will, Logan had been sat next to Oscar, both grateful to have a friend next to them. Fortunately, on Oscar’s other side was Max, a driver who’d always been respectful toward the American. Lewis completed the quartet, another driver that Logan wouldn’t have to worry about in terms of kindness.

When the panel started, almost none of the questions were for him. He’d expected that, he wasn’t exactly having an overwhelming season. Especially compared to the joys and successes of the Red Bull world champion or the unexpected high-placing finishes of the Aussie next to him. And his woes were nothing to write home about when placed next to the declining team performances from the 7-time world champion and future Ferrari driver.

So, as he had expected, most of the questions were asked to his left.

But he’d been put on the panel for a reason, and eventually an America-related question did arise, signaling that maybe he would be of use today.

“Good morning,” the reporter calls out toward Logan and he smiles with a nod toward the darkness where the reporters are all sat.

“Morning.”

“How’s it feel to be back racing in America? You have any family or special guests in the garage this weekend, giving you that extra boost?”

Oscar nudges his knee with his own, causing Logan to let out a small laugh as he glances over. He actually did have some special guests in the garage, not just his own family, who’d come from Miami for this, but also, you, his Fiancée. And his 4-year-old daughter, of course.

Your entire family lived in Texas. So whenever you werent following Logan around the world, you landed back home in Texas, the family home being the best place for your daughter to grow up. It helped that your parents loved her more than the world, constant presents being rained down on the little girl every time you’d bring her. He hadn’t seen you in about two months, not having had a time to come back to America since summer. So having you in his garage for the first time in a while was all that much more of a motivator for him.

He raises the microphone to his lips to say a paraphrased version of that, your relationship not being a very public one yet. Logan wanted to get the wedding done before he paraded you around, not wanting to add the stress of the public on your already existing stress from wedding planning and taking care of your daughter.

“It’s always great to get back home, you know? Uh, got to stay with some family out here for a few days, got some good southern food in me, which was great,” Logan laughs lightly, watching as the reporters grin widens, “And it always feels different when you’ve got important people in the garage, cheering you on. People who don’t usually get to make it, so that’s really nice.”

The reporter nods as Logan puts his mic down, but she raises hers to further the questioning, “Anyone specific? A lot of people were curious about a few different people in your garage.”

Logan nods, your family was pretty well known, especially in Texas. You weren’t famous or anything, but you’d grown up like Logan and when people have that type of money, their names get spoken pretty often.

“Yeah, some close family and friends. You’re probably asking about the l/n’s and I, um, knew them growing up so it’s really nice to see them out here supporting me,” Logan pauses slightly. The internet was pretty sure he had a girlfriend, not that he’d confirmed anything. It wasn’t hard to figure out though, as he almost never shut up about you. But it wouldn’t hurt if he mentioned having a girlfriend, right? Everyone already knew that anyway, it couldn’t do too much damage, “My girlfriend’s here, as well. Really happy to have her here, she hasn’t been to a race in a while.”

Oscar snorts, making Logan glare at the Aussie. Oscar knew you were more than his girlfriend, having been present at the engagement. He also knew Logan was leaving out a key family member in his list, a certain baby being completely unmentioned.

“Well it’s always nice to have your family, right?” The reporter nods with a kind smile, jotting something down on her notebook.

Logan nods with a matching smile, eyes shining as he thinks about you and your family in the garage, “Yeah, and I mean, my daughter-“

Logan pauses, stomach dropping as he takes in the slip-up. He glances over to Oscar whose eyes are wide with shock, mouth dropped open slightly. Max leans forward to lock eyes with the American from Oscars other side, eyebrows furrowed. Lewis looks his way as well, but his expression is soft as he takes in the younger man’s evident embarrassment.

Logan had fucked up.

His cheeks are bright red as all the eyes in the room stare at him, questioning looks on their faces. Logan laughs slightly, rubbing the back of his neck as he looks back out toward the reporter who’s now wearing an incredulous smile, “Shit.”

This breaks some of the shock in the room, laughs ringing out from in front of him. Logan shakes his head with another embarrassed laugh, “My girlfriends gonna be so mad at me.”

Logan drops the mic next to him, reaching his hands up to shield his face in order to avoid some of the embarrassment. Oscar, still laughing, reaches over to pat him on the back, his free hand stifling the laugh threatening to escape his throat.

Luckily for Logan, they run out of time before the questions can get back to him and the surprise child he just revealed he had. He’s quick to rush out of the room, only pausing to allow Oscar to catch up before he’s gone again, practically running to Williams.

He can hear Oscar struggling to keep up behind him, shocked laughs occasionally echoing out as he runs.

“Logan- Come on, slow down man!” Oscars calling out toward the blond, Logan continuing at his fast pace. He only slows when he makes it to hospitality, Oscar slamming on his brakes in order to avoid crashing into the taller mans back.

Logans eyes scan the room in search of you, Oscar reaching a tired arm up to rest agaisnt the distressed Americans shoulder.

Oscars groaning as Logan walks off, apparently having caught sight of your family.

“Hi, Mrs. L/N,” Logan says shyly as he walks up to your mom, a sheepish smile painted on his flushed face. Your mom turns toward him with a smile but after taking in his guilty demeanor, she looks at him suspiciously.

“You’ve known me for 18 years and you’ve never called me Mrs L/N,” your mom looks your fiancé up and down, eyes narrowing as she catches sight of an equally nervous Oscar, “What did you do, Logan? And why did you drag Oscar into it?”

Logan laughs nervously, glancing back at Oscar who ducks his head, looking away from the interaction, “Do you, maybe, know where y/n is? It’s important.”

Your mom pauses, suspicion still rolling of her in waves. But, sensing Logan’s urgency, she nods, “She’s in your room with Nat.”

Logan can’t help the smile that shows at the mention of your daughter’s name, sighing slightly with relief, “Thank you, I need to go talk to her.”

Your mom just nods, watching as Logan starts to walk quickly away, moving toward you in his room. Oscar moves to follow but your mom is calling him back before he can take a step, “Stay here, Oscar. Let him go, you’re going to tell me about the season. Either that or you’ll be the one to tell me what Logan did.”

Oscar, having had plenty of conversations with your mother while growing up, sighs, accepting his fate, “It’s been good.”

Logan, though, has made it to his room, opening the door quietly as he reaches it. He smiles once he looks inside, being met with you dancing around with your daughter, music playing from your phone on the table. As the door opens, your daughter looks over, a grin breaking out on her little face as she practically lights up, “Daddy!”

Logan grins as your daughter jumps up, sprinting over to jump into her dad’s embrace, giggling as he lifts her up into the air, clutching her gently to his chest, “Hi, baby. You having fun with mama?”

Your daughter nods, smiling brightly as she turns to look back at you, “Yeah! Me and mama went to see the cars and they let me sit in it! I wanna be a driver like you, dad.”

Logan grins, looking over to where you’re stood, a small smile on your face as you watch the interaction. When you catch Logan’s gaze on you, you speak up, “They let her sit in your car. They told her about how her daddy races every weekend and she decided that that’s what she wanted to do. She said you’re the coolest person she knows, now.”

Logan laughs, warmth filling his heart as you recap your daughter’s words, “Just don’t tell her Oscar races, too. Can’t have her thinking he’s cooler than me.”

You daughter looks up at the statement, confusion crossing her face, “Uncle Os drives fast too?”

Logan hums, nodding as he sways, your daughter resting her head on his chest, “Yeah, he does. He’s not as cool as me, though.”

You daughter hums, “I think he’s pretty cool.”

You laugh, moving toward the father-daughter pair, a serious look crossing your face, “He is, baby. Do you want to go see him so I can talk to daddy?”

Logan grimaces but lets go as your daughter nods, letting you set her down. She wraps her small hand around one of your fingers, swaying happily at the idea of seeing her Australian uncle.

You push the door open to go find Oscar but when you look up, you see Oscar’s already stood there. He looks exhausted and Logan knows that a conversation with your mom was no doubt the reason why.

“Uncle Ozzy!” Your daughter’s small voice calls from below you, causing a bright grin to burst onto Oscar’s face as he picks her up, the small girls hands immediately moving to push against his face. Oscar laughs, moving an arm to support the small girls weight as she pushes his face around.

You smile at the pair, laughing as your daughter grasps Oscars hair in her small fists and pulls gently, just watching as his head rolls around, “Can you watch her? I have to talk to Logan.”

Oscar smirks, glancing over your shoulder to see Logan standing sheepishly, “Someones in trouble.”

You hum, small smile on your lips, “Can you just hang with her for a minute?”

“Yeah, I can,” Oscar says, smiling down at your daughter in his arms, “Anything for my favourite American.”

You hear Logan mumble “rude” under his breath, warranting a snort from you as you watch Oscar walk away, no doubt about to parade your daughter around to anyone who'd listen.

You turn back around, coming face-to-face with Logans grimacing form, “Saw the panel.”

Logan winces, rubbing his hand along the back of his neck, “Yeah?”

You hum, stepping across the room to reach your fiance, “Mhm, I did.”

“Im sorry,” Logan sighs, looking anywhere but at you.

You can't help the small laugh that escapes you at his clear distress. Logans head snaps up, confusion crossing his face at your apparent glee, “What?”

“Im not mad, Lo,” you laugh, wrapping your arms around his neck. He stares at you, a puzzled look stuck on his previously fear-stricken face.

“You’re not?”

You smile up at him, shaking your head, “I mean, it's not how I would’ve wanted to announce it but I don’t mind too much.”

“Really?” You giggle when you catch the relief on his face, his shoulders dropping dramatically.

“Mhm,” you tangle one of your hands in the hair at the nape of his neck, his head tilting slightly back into your touch, “It was nice to be private for a while during the engagement. We didn’t have concrete wedding plans and Nat was so young. But the weddings basically planned and Nats old enough to handle herself in public, I think it’s a really good time, actually. Do you want to say something official?”

“I will, but until then I’d be happy to not have to hide you guys,” Logan grins, a hand reaching up to grasp the side of your face. You blush as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead.

“That sounds lovely,” you say, untangling yourself from his hold, “But, for now, I think you have interviews to attend to.”

“Yeah, yeah, I do,” Logan replies, but his gaze is still locked on you, love filling his eyes, “I’ll see you in a minute, I love you.”

“Love you too, Lo. Go do your interviews,” Your soft smile shines, lighting up your face.

Logan nods, moving to exit the small room, stopping to send you another grin. You laugh, pushing him out of the room, the door sliding closed behind him.

He moves on practical auto-pilot, feet carrying him to the media pen, thoughts of his family stuck on his mind. He reaches the pen quickly, spotting a group of about 8 drivers all huddled together in a chat. He thinks about walking the other direction but Max spots him first, gesturing for the younger driver to walk over. Logan agrees reluctantly, making his way to his fellow drivers.

“Logan!” Max calls, a smile on his face as he greets the Williams driver warmly.

Logan nods, smiling at Max politely, “Hey, Max.”

Max grins, throwing an arm around the blond driver, “How are you doing?”

Logan hums with a small smirk, knowing exactly what Max was eluding to, “I’m great, actually. Thanks for asking, Max.”

Max tilts his head with a wide smile, raising an eyebrow, “Yeah?”

“Yeah, I mean, you know how my morning went.”

Max seems to catch that Logan’s allowing him to publicly address the situation in front of the other drivers, turning his attention to the slightly confused drivers around them, “How’d the Mrs feel about it?”

“She was fine with it,” Logan smiles, “Honestly kinda happy to be open about it.”

“I didn’t know you had a girlfriend,” Lando says from across the small circle, a confused look occupying his face.

Logan shakes his head lightly, arms crossed across his chest, “Fiancée, actually. Been engaged for like a year now.”

This sends a wave of shock around the group, Daniel being the only one to pipe up, a huge smile on his face, “I know what this is about!”

George turns to the VCARB driver, a questioning look laying beneath his dramatic sunglasses, “What are you talking about?”

Before Daniel can explain, a high-pitched voice yells out from behind Logan.

“Daddy!”

Several drivers turn, being met with the sight of a small girl sprinting her way toward the group, a smiley Oscar trailing along behind her. The girl giggled as she approaches her father, skipping along happily as she gets near him. Logan leans down, opening his arms to let her walk into his grasp. She wraps her arms around his neck and Logan holds her tightly as Oscar stops behind him.

“Hey baby,” Logan says to his daughter as he looks down at her, “Have a good time with uncle Osc?”

The small girl nods excitedly, grinning as she looks back over to the man she’d spent the past 15 minutes with, “Ozzy took me to the orange garage, um, papaya I think actually, and I got to sit in another car!”

Logan hums, running a hand through the girls hair, trying his best to swipe it back into place, “Yeah?”

“Uh huh, it was really fun!”

Logan smiles, turning back to thank Oscar for looking after the girl. He turns back around, catching the gaze of about 8 different F1 drivers, all with varying levels of shock painted on their faces, “I don't know if you guys saw, but, um, I accidently revealed i had a daughter this morning and, um, this is her?”

Max is the first to laugh, having already been through his shock about the young girl currently attached to her father. Logans face heats as the drivers stare, Nat burrowing her head in her fathers neck as she tries to discreetly glance at the men around her without having to make any eye contact.

“Congrats, man,” Daniel grins, moving over to clap the younger driver on the back. Logan chuckles slightly as your daughter finally moves her head away from him, her curiosity at the Aussie overtaking her shyness.

The honey badger smiles at her, nodding his head. She smiles gently, reaching a small fist out toward the man. Daniels eyes widen at the gesture, eyes glancing between the girl and her outstretched arm before he reaches his own hand up to fist-bump hers. She nods with a satisfied smile, turning back toward Logans neck.

“He’s kinda cool, I think,” She mumbles and Logan smiles glancing over to see if Daniel has heard her words. Based on the increased grin on his face, Logan figures he had.

The rest of the drivers take their turns congratulating Logan on his fatherhood and introducing themselves to the small girl, her favourites being Daniel, Max, George and Alex, who she’d already met in the Williams garage over the past few months.

Eventually, all the socializing caused her to fall asleep against her father's chest, her tired eyes slowly drifting closed. Logan sways slightly, trying his best to soothe her in her slumber.

Once she's fallen asleep, he turns to Oscar, "Do you know where y/n is?"

Oscar nods, "I think she'd fallen asleep when I went to drop Nat back off. Didn't want to wake her so I just brought her over here."

Logan nods, glancing over to see the other drivers getting pulled into interviews. He didn't want to wake you, knowing how little sleep you'd been getting lately with all the wedding planning and your daughter. Anyone else in your family would be too hard to find on such short notice.

So, when his pr officer calls him over to do interviews, he holds Nat a little bit tighter, hoping the interviews don't wake her.

He smiles at the shocked interviewer as she hands him a microphone which he holds in his free hand, trying his best to support your daughter with one arm.

"Morning," Logan nods, voice low.

The interviewer nods slightly, shaking herself out of her shock so she can ask the American some questions.

"Good morning!" Logan thanks his lucky stars as the woman catches his drift and tries her hardest to stay cheerful while keeping her voice relatively quiet, "I had a couple questions about the panel from this morning but it seems you've answered them yourself before I could even ask."

Logan laughs, glancing down at his girl before bringing the microphone to his lips, "Yeah, my girlfriend was asleep and I didn't want to wake her so this girl is joining us today."

The interviewer smiles warmly, "Before this I saw she was hanging out with some of the other drivers?"

"Yeah, yeah, she was. She, uh, had a good time getting to meet some of the grid. But, you know, all the socializing tired her out."

The woman in front of him nods again, glancing over his shoulder at who Logan knew to be Max, getting asked questions across the pen, "How'd they react?"

"I think they were pretty surprised, you know? I don't think a lot of them saw the panel from this morning and even then, I didn't really give much of an explanation. Don't think Max even believed me until Oscar brought her over," Logan laughs, grinning lovingly at the girl starting to stir in his arms.

"Hi baby," Logan says gently, watching as the little girl rubs at her eyes, trying to pull the tiredness from them.

"Hi Dad, where'd Ozzy go?"

Logan glances over his shoulder, looking for the Australian in question. He eventually sees him, turning his body so Nat can see him as well,

"Uncle Osc is just over there, angel."

The girls nods, a frown still on her face from having to wake up, “What about Maxy?”

Logan grins, happy that his daughter was already comfortable with his fellow drivers, even going as far to seek Max out. Logan turns straight around, pointing behind them at the Red Bull driver, "He's there. And Danny's next to him."

The girl nods, a satisfied look on her face as she spots her new friends. Logan turns back to the interviewer, the grin not leaving his face.

Max, meanwhile, is in the middle of an interview when he notice the interviewer looking over his shoulder. Max looks at the man in front of him with a confused look, the man quick to explain.

"Think the newest addition to the paddock is looking for you, Max."

Max looks over his shoulder to see a small girl, chin resting on her dad's shoulder as she stares back at Max. When he turns to see her, she grins, moving a small hand to wave excitedly at the driver before moving to tug at her father's hair, looking for his attention.

Max grins, waving back as Logan looks over, indulging the girl. She laughs happily, getting even more excited as she spots Daniel beside him.

"Maxy! Danny!" Max looks beside him and sees that Daniel hasn't noticed your daughters yelling and he quickly leans to the side, poking the Aussie. Daniel turns to the side to see what Max wants but is instead met with Max pointing vaguely across the pen. Daniel glances over and grins when he sees Logan and his daughter, the smaller of the two waving hurriedly at the pair of drivers.

Daniel waves back, a grin practically splitting his face. The interviewer sends him a questioning glance and he laughs lightly, "Seems we've got a new cheerleader, then."

The interviewer laughs, quickly returning to the questions. Max, after waving bye to your daughter, turns back as well.

Your daughter, now properly noticed by her new favorite drivers, turns back around, letting Logan get back to his questions. She wraps her arms around his neck gently, smiling in satisfaction as she leans up to tell him something.

"I like your friends, dad."

Logan smiles warmly, happy to see her getting along with his coworkers, "I'm glad, baby."

———————————————

@casperlikej @evie-119

[yudgefudge]

Footballers as Pokemon Trainers, YNWA EDITION

Klopp, Alisson Becker and Virgil are in this post. Also this one is kind of longer than the others, sorry! I just really like how these teams came out and wanted to explain my reasonings behind them!!

@liverpool-enjoyer, @addictivewhispering and @lonely-salamander the usual! come get ur food, etc.

Firstly, as I'm doing Liverpool's manager, I'd like to cover Liverpool's mascot Pokemon as well, which I'd say is Moltres. Because it's just like the red bird on the Liverpool thingie. All mascots will probably be legendaries/mythicals/pseudos unless some other pokemon fits PERFECTLY for it.

Now onto Klopp himself.

Jurgen Klopp

now my friend theo (@addictivewhispering) made an EXCELLENT post about how different coaches would be as pokemon trainers, and with their permission I'll be putting that here:

i think klopp would prioritize speedy pokemon with good attack. glass cannons who are fragile defensively (get it bc liverpool players are always injured...). he'd use lots of priority moves along with things like u-turn and volt switch to try and overrun the opponent. always tries to hit as hard as he can, lots of boosted crit rate moves too

That sums up what I'd see his Pokemon fighting style to be! As a coach he gets to go past the 3 pokemon pattern I've been doing so far, but other than coaches (and Ronaldo, when I get around to him), everyone else should have three pokemon.

Talonflame

Although I don't believe it would be his starter, I believe Talonflame would be Klopp's signature battling Pokemon. First of all, it's the red YWNA bird. Secondly it fits with his fighting style; Talonflame plays as a fragile cannon and can also be used as a pivot since it learns U-Turn. Another thing I did with these was I tried to make them advantageous (and disadvantageous) in certain conditions, as a cheeky reference to how Klopp often blames the outcome of a match on the conditions of the pitch (the wind, height of grass, etc.). So for Talonflame, it has a 4x weakness to Stealth Rocks, which is the most prominent entry hazard in the metagame currently. It's also powerful in the Sun weather, and really bad in Rain.

2. Perrserker

This is what I believe would be Klopp's starter Pokemon, and by extension, his partner Pokemon. When I sent Max an ask about this sort of thing, she suggested Melmetal for Klopp, but I don't give legendaries to trainers, so I decided on giving him a Steel-type. Perrserker has his beard and also his toothy grin, as well as jovial attitude, but fierceness in battle (on the pitch). Perrserker's ability, Steely Spirit, powers up other Steel-types in the party (although I didn't give klopp any more steel types) which feels very YNWA to me. Also, Perrserker is very good in Sandstorm.

3. Abomasnow

This one is the main part of my "translating the Klopp blaming the weather meme" idea. Abomasnow is bearded like Klopp as well. But for those who don't know, Abomasnow's ability sets up Hail (called Snow now) which is obviously its most advantageous weather. It also has a 4x weakness to Fire, which ties in with Talonflame and having disadvantages in certain situations. And although I agrre that Klopp would use sweepers, I do think he would still want to set up an Aurora Veil.

4. Hydreigon

Drei is the german word for three. Hydreigon is german. Jurgen is german. Hydreigon also has a 4x weakness to Fairy type.

5. Noibat

Jurgen would capture a Noibat because he found it cute, then would realize it can amplify his voice, then use it when celebrating at the sides to make his laughs of joy heard, as well as when he shouts orders. He also thinks it's very cute. It also has a 4x weakness to Ice.

idk if u've noticed, but it seems like Klopp's team is good against one another. Well it was intentional. I feel like Klopp would unintentionally do that. Then he's just like. Oh well. Anyways

Alisson Becker

Does not like battling that much, if at all. Prefers contests if anything, but really just wants to vibe, tbh. Also I accidentally made him a Fairy type trainer. Oh well.

Shiny Ribombee

Max said that Alisson would have a weakness for cute things like and I agree. Cutiefly (Ribombee's baby form) is the smallest, cutest thing ever. I feel like Alisson would meet it by catching it between a pair of big goalkeeper gloves and just fall in love with it. Idk. And then they were inseparable from there.

2. Mega Gardevoir

Alisson always gave me the vibes of "fierce, cute protector" which is exactly what Gardevoir is. People think it's weak and flimsy because of it's design...but it can literally open black holes. Yeah I'm not 100% about this one but I think it fits. Well, I can guarantee you Alisson would have a Ralts.

3. Cottonee

Another example of him having a weakness for pretty things. The way Cottonee's cotton is styled reminds me of Alisson's hair and beard as well. Also I imagine he lets it use Aromatherapy to calm him down when he's anxious.

Virgil:

Virgil definitely just likes big, defensive, scary-looking Pokemon. But secretly they're all just sillies like he is.

Golurk

Golurk would definitely be his starter...like that's Virgil embodied right there. It has his looming stare, big frame, and also it fucking flies and I think Virgil would find that awesome, and take Alisson on rides with it.

2. Metagross

Similar reasoning to Golurk tbh. But here's the thing. Despite how big and strong Metagross looks, it's still weak to Knock Off (dark-type move), and that fact for some reason, reminds me of that video of Van Dijk tripping where the commentator called him van disney. yeah don't ask idk either.

3. Grimmsnarl

Alisson kept bugging him to capture a 'cute' fairy type,,,,,and it's this fucking thing yep

[awindylife-writes]

Voyage of the Damned Part 3

Relationships: the Doctor x reader, Astrid x reader (platonic), Astrid x Doctor (platonic)

Summary: Voyage of the Damned rewrite. The Doctor and you find yourselves on the Titanic, space edition. You meet Astrid and get ready for a wonderful day, but then a meteor shower hits the ship and it starts falling towards Earth.

Author's notes: There was a number of things l didn't like about this Christmas special so again, l rewrote it.

Warnings: a ship crashes, multiple mentions of dearth bc a lot of people die, Astrid dies

"It's for the Doctor!" Astrid yelled at Midshipman Frame over the comms. She needed to teleport NOW. "Y/n and him are down on deck thirty-one, alone, against all the Host and Gods know what else and they're doing it for us!" Silence on the other end. "It's time we did something for them," she ended her speech with a finallity.

A moment passed and she feared she'd failed.

But then, "Giving you power," came through the comms.

~

"Only one person could have the power and the money to hide themselves on board like that. And l should know, 'cause..." the Doctor trailed off. You stared at the strange compartment you had found on deck thirty-one.

"My name is Max," a voice finished for him. A strange machine with a head in it came through the smoke.

"Who the hell are you?" it demaned.

"I'm y/n, and this is the Doctor," you pointed at your friend with false cheerfulness, "Hello!" you wiggled your fingers in greeting.

~

"You wreck the ship and the board find their shares halved in value." The Doctor was spelling out Capricorn's plan.

"But that's not enough," you interjected. From what you've learned about them, mad billionares who were losing all their money didn't do things half-way.

"Oh yes,"  the Doctor went on. "'Cause if a Max Capricorn ship hits the Earth, it destroys an entire planet. Outrage back home!" he growled. "Scandal! The buisness is wiped out!"

The billionare's head nodded. "And? The whole board is thrown in jail, for mass murder!" His eyes shone with revenge.

"While you sit here, safe in the- what's it called?" you turned to the Doctor.

"Impact camber," he filled in.

"I have men," Capricorn gloated now, "waiting to retreave me from the ruins. And enough off-world accounts to retire me to the beaches of Enhaxico Two where the ladies, so l'm told, are very fond of... metal."

You were going to puke.

"So that's the plan," the Doctor growled in rage. "A retirement plan. Two thousand people on this ship, six billion underneath us, all of them slaughtered and why? Because Max Capricorn is a loser."

"I never lose," the billionare's head scowled in threat and your voice immediately rang out, mocking, "You can't even sink the Titanic!"

"Oh but l can, pretty girl!" he laughed. "I can cancel the engines, from here!" Red lights and alarms were suddenly flaring everywhere before you could spit in his face.

The Doctor yelled behind you, "You can't do this!"

"Host, hold them!" Caprocorn ordered in turn and began the Gloat 2.0. "Not so clever now, are you? Shame we couldn't work together, you two are rather good. All that banter and yet not a word wasted." The head sighed. "Time for me to... retire."

Ugh, you thought as you furiously tried to get free. That pun alone would be enough to kill a buisness.

"The Titanic is falling, the sky will burn, let the Christmas inferno commence!" Capricorn yelled in victory and called his minions. "Kill them!"

The robots brought up their halos and went for the Doctor's neck.

"NO!" You fought with everything you had but you were late, you'd be too late!

"MISTER CAPRICORN!" a voice you knew cut through your fear.

And it ignited terror. It was Astrid, sitting in a forklift. "I resign," she told the head and drove forward, ful throttle.

"NO!" the Doctor and you screamed, "ASTRID STOP!" "ASTRID DON'T!"

She didn't listen and rammed into the life support system, but its engine was too strong. They were equal and couldn't move each other.

You bit, kicked and screamed, anything to get free.

But then she caught your eyes with hers and everything stopped. There was an eternity in her face. She looked at the Doctor too but you still stared at her.

Then she turned away and stepped on it. The life support lifted and she drove on.

There was no sound. The world was mute as you watched Astrid go over.

You were suddenly at the edge, looking at her disappear into the fire. Someone was screaming. Someone was screaming and you wanted to calm them, help them.

Then you realized it was your own voice.

The world came back into focus. The ship was falling apart and the Doctor was silent at your side. He was staring at the spot where Astrid had disappeared. His face was pale and his eyes blank. You laid your tears aside and took his hand.

"We need to go," you told him, your voice wet with tears. He didn't move.

"Doctor, we need to go,"  you told him again calmly. You thought that was why he looked at you suddenly, and then stood up.

He rewired a Host with lightning speed. It took you each under one arm and off you went.

When you broke through the ceiling of the bridge, you were still in one piece. Arms you had used to shield your head were a bit bloody and you were sure there were at least two splinters in them. You don't look the gift horse in the mouth, even though you would prefer a different Christmas miracle.

"What's your first name?" the Doctor asked the injured Midshipman Frame.

He answered in confusion, "Alonzo."

"You're kidding," the Doctor breathed as a shocked smile spread on his face. You didn't know. You just didn't know anymore. You were drowing in the emptiness inside you but his name was Alonzo.

"Allons-y, Alonzo!" the Doctor yelled and you held on tight. You didn't scream. You didn't even open your mouth. There was nothing anymore.

The Doctor whoohooed when he managed to right the course of the ship and you were just there. Were you there? Astrid wasn't. And that was what mattered in the end.

~

"TELEPORT!" the Doctor yelled and it didn't matter. "Y/N, SHE WAS WEARING A TELEPORT BRACELET!!!"

That woke you up. You ran faster than ever before, to the main deck where the teleport was.

"Brixton, sonic," the Doctor demanded from the billionare and caught it as it was thrown. "Mister Copper, the teleports, have they got an emergency setting??"

"I don't know, they should have?"

"She fell, Mister Copper, she fell!" the Doctor told him while pulling apart the machine like a madman. "What's the emergency code?"

The billionare interjected, "What the hell are you doing?"

"We can bring her back!" you yelled with everything in you.

The historian explained, "If a passenger has an accident on shore leave, their molecules are automatically suspended so they're in stasis, so if you just trigger the shift..."

"THERE!!!" the Doctor screamed and flicked the switch.

And there was your Astrid.

"Falling..." You could hear her voice!

"Only halfway there, come on!" The Doctor wasn't finished with the teleporter.

"I keep falling!" She was scared. Your friend was scared and you wanted nothing but to calm her. You carefully walked up to her and took hold of her hand. It felt like holding warm smoke.

There were tears on your cheeks already, again.

"If l can find the molecule grid, boost the restoration matrix and-" The computer snapped and threw sparks. "NO-NO-NO-NO-NO!!" the Doctor screamed in desparation, "need more phase containment-"

You sobbed, but you knew what was coming. You just looked at your Astrid Pith, into her crystal blue eyes and sushed her. "Hey, hey Astrid, it's alright. It's me, it's y/n, remember? You're alright. l've got you," you promised with a voice as soft as sunlight.

She didn't look as scared as before. Then, so slowly you thought you were imagining it, she looked at you.

"Let her go," you could hear the historian and you sobbed again.

But then Astrid's voice cut through. "Stop me falling?" she asked and you nodded. You found her gaze with yours and promised her, "Anything."

"She's just atoms," you heard Mister Copper from behind you. "An echo with a ghost of consciousness."

"She's stardust," you concluded as your voice broke. "You hear that Astrid?" you asked, still looking into her blue eyes."You're stardust."

She didn't seem to hear, so you did the only thing you could think of.

"There's an old tradition," you told her and softly kissed her cheek. Then you kissed the other, and then her forehead.

"You dreamt of traveling," the Doctor came to stand beside you. You were still sobbing when you pulled away from her and you didn't try to stop. There was no one there you needed to save face for.

"Now you can travel forever," you told her. You knew what the Doctor would do, and your eyes didn't leave hers for a moment.

You heard him soothe her, "You're not falling Astrid."

"You're flying," you both said in one voice.

You watched as she floated away, through the window into the universe.

Then you turned to the Doctor and buried your face in his chest as you both cried.

~

"I transferred all my shares to Max Capricorn's rivals. It's made me rich," the billionare Brixton admitted, disbelieving.

You were empty, and you were tired. That was the only reason why you didn't tear this man limb from limb. Astrid was dead.

"Mister Copper," the Doctor's voice woke you up. "I think, you deserve one of these."

You turned around and saw him holding a teleport bracelet out to the historian. Then, after the latter took it, he slipped one on your wrist. He took your hand and suddenly you were standing in the snow.

~

"But l can have a house, and a garden and-" You couldn't help but smile a little. At least Mister Copper would be alright.

The Doctor yelled after him, "Where are you going?"

"I have no idea!" the man replied in joy.

"Well, we don't either," your alien smiled gently at you and you tried to smile back, you really did. He looked at you, his brown eyes full of sorrow, and pulled you to him. You held onto him tightly as he hugged you.

"But! Y/N!" the historian yelled and you turned in his direction.

"I won't forget her," he promised you. You were tired, so so tired, so you just nodded. "Thank you," you told Mister Copper for her. "We won't either."

"We won't," the Doctor assured you softly, just to be sure.

Then he opened the TARDIS door and stepped into your home after you. You walked up the way and then stood in front of the controls, lost.

The Doctor walked up behind you and decided he would do anything, anything to keep away the blank look in your eyes. He turned to you and pulled you to him again. You let him, your movements sluggish and dazed.

"I've got you," he assured you. "I've got you, y/n. You aren't alone, and you aren't lost. You've got me." And that was enough. You sobbed into his chest, you didn't know for which time today.

But this was different. This was yours, and you clung to the Doctor as everything in you came to the surface.

His tears joined yours. He'd lost Astrid too, and he hated seeing you in pain. He slowly brought both of you down to kneel when you were too tired to stand.

And that was it. That was what you needed and that was what you had. You would be alright. In time, you would be alright.

[mccall-me-maurice]

LOTF Drabbles for every single one of my ships based on songs on my playlist while I wait for the movers to finish

Jalph [Boom Clap - Charli XCX]: “You’re the glitter in the darkness of my world.”

Jack glances at the fair boy’s face from across the classroom. Somehow, even with the disgusting lights the school provides for their students, Ralph manages to make them appear as if they’re worth $100. It’s probably just the way that the redhead views him, only knowing portions about the boy, as if he was glancing through a keyhole. The feelings that boil under Jack’s skin - froth spilling over the edge of the pot and into the fire - consume his every waking day, plague every thought that rushes through his skull. But he has to place a glass lid on top of the water because god forbid anyone figure out that he was in love with Ralph Allebach. God forbid anyone figure out he was queer. Because in the end, he was just a fucked up kid drunk on the love he had for his nemesis. A kid the real world would tear apart, limb by limb.

Rogermon [Walk Away - The Script]: “(S)he finds colour in the darkest places, (S)he finds beauty in the saddest of faces.”

A flower bud sprouts in the garden of Eden, without even knowing that it had just entered paradise. It sinks its roots into perfect soil, the plant itself never realising that it had found a home where other’s didn’t even know of its existence. Simon Cortés was like Roger Volkov’s garden of Eden. Every time the boy created a scar or slashed open a mental wound, Simon was there to heal it. He would administer the pill, absorb the bad things with his own light, stitch every laceration that used to leave Roger doubled over and overflowing with rage. Simon Cortés was an angel trying his hardest to turn a devil to the right side of the coin.

Mauram [The Other Side - Jason DeRulo]: “This could be perfect, but we won’t know unless we try.”

Maurice always felt like there was nothing in the world to fight for. No matter who came in and out of the house inside of his brain, nobody would stay for very long. Nobody could stay for very long. He never made room for anyone in the four walls, knowing that he had enough space for himself and that was good enough. Or, it used to be good enough. But one can only live in a house all alone for so long before they start to long for someone there with them. At the very least a neighbourhood surrounding him, so maybe he wouldn’t be all alone. Which is exactly what Sam Pinch did. He slowly found the materials and built his own residence right next to Maurice’s. A boy who the brunette never wanted to talk to, who he actively avoided at the beginnings of their friendship, had opened the front door and never swung it shut. Because, in the end, Maurice couldn’t call anything home if he didn’t have Sam.

Robric [Capital Letters - Hailee Steinfeld]: “When we lie so still, but you’re taking me places.”

Robert was honestly bored with his life before he met the twins. It was the same daily routine, get up, get ready, go to school, attend choir practice then rinse and repeat. Falling into something familiar did feel nice at times, knowing that every hour of the day was used to it’s fullest and that he could predict when things would get done or when he’d have free time. But the twins brought a specific spice in his life, one that everyone else had failed to do. In the end, it was mostly Eric who forced Robert up and out of his comfort zone, aiding him in more mischievous tasks and generally becoming the brunette’s backbone. Eric was there, in the hospital, when Robert sprained his wrist, apologising profusely about ever making him try to climb a tree to grab an apple. And even in the immense pain shooting through his wrist, he blamed himself for ever doing. It occurred to him then, in the hospital waiting room, that no matter what happened to the two of them, Robert would always find a way to defend Eric. Even if the boy was clearly in the wrong. When all was said and all was done, Eric was the most important thing in Robert’s life. And he was oddly okay with that.

Billiggy [Breaking Your Own Heart - Kelly Clarkson]: “The very thing you’ve been the most afraid of, you’ve been doing from the start.”

Bill can’t remember ever apologising to anyone. For anything. His pride has always been greater than that, never letting the blonde stoop so low as to get on his knees and beg someone for forgiveness. In all honesty, he’s never done anything bad enough to need to beg someone to just let him have another chance. If you really wanted to look at it through a kaleidoscope lens, then one could assume Bill was petrified of hurting someone’s feelings and then needing to apologise. But that heart gripping sensation was something he had to conquer upon apologising to Peter Curtis for past mistakes. He’d known he was probably in the wrong at the time and convinced himself that he was right in some sick, twisted manner. So when he stuttered out the words to try and excuse his behaviour, Bill knew that they didn’t sound as genuine as he wanted them too. But Peter just chuckled and claimed that he had known for a while that Bill didn’t mean it, and out of everyone in the choir to forgive, he was more than willing to part on good terms with the blonde. And that’s how Bill Borg found himself in an unusual friendship with the boy he once called Piggy.

Wilrold [Jet Black Heart - 5 Seconds of Summer]: “But these chemicals moving between us are the reason to start again.”

Of all the people in the world to fall in love with, Wilfred Lucio chose his childhood best friend. And he’s almost certain that Harold Miracle has fallen in love with him too. Between the way he spends every waking hour with Wilfred and how he clings to the boy as if they’re attracting sides of magnets. He’s never that way with anyone else, in fact, Harold gives most people serious attitude when they ask him innocent enough questions. It is almost as if nobody else in this world matters to him quite like Wilfred does. Which is probably why the two do everything together, they’re practically conjoined at the hip. And that’s why nothing hurts the teal haired boy more than watching Harold run off and be free on his own, blind to the fact that his own best friend was drowning in an unconditional love for him that couldn’t be stopped, no matter how many barricades were built.

Perciberry [This Town - Niall Horan]: “And I know that it’s wrong, That I can’t move on.”

Max’s worst fear was always losing Percival. It was always watching the soft smile that breaks out on his face dissipate like sugar in boiling water. So when the brunette comes to Max, tears streaming down his cheeks and nose tinged red from the crying he’s still doing, the boy assumes the worst. For once, his intuition is right. Percival doesn’t give a reason, doesn’t let the other have any insight. Just sobs out a break up and retreats, broken cries still ringing in Max’s ears. Weeks and weeks pass and the boy knows that he’s still in love with Percival, he still loves the way he laughs as if everything is the funniest thing he’s ever heard, he still loves how Percival insists people call him “Percy” because it’s easier for the boy himself to remember. Despite every path Max taking leading him directly to the feet of Percival Wemys Maddison, he knows that deep down in the base of his heart, something made him unloveable. He was the one who tore them apart, he was the thorn in their side. He wasn’t sure how he did it, but he’d lost the one person who swore to love him until death. And Max would still take Percival’s hand and grip it tight if he asked.

Jalter [Use Somebody - Kings of Leon]: “You know that I could use somebody, someone like you, and all you know and how you speak.”

Johnny is one of the only people in Walter’s life who doesn’t judge any of the choices he makes. He tries to advise the boy in the right direction; steer him on the right path, but he will never tell Walter what he can and cannot do. This fact is endearing in a way, making the dark haired boy want to wrap his friend up in a tight hug and spin him around until they couldn’t stand anymore. Everlasting support was something Walter always lacked from others, so getting it from the strawberry blonde just boosted his self confidence and the image he chose to paint himself as. It takes him years upon years of being Johnny’s friend before he realises that the boy was always by his side not because he just wanted to be there for Walter. But because he couldn’t stand to watch the boy do it alone. Johnny has made Walter the centre of his galaxy subconsciously, just letting the raven haired boy become the sun and letting himself revolve around him. But to Walter, Johnny was the sun and he was the moon. The boy would light him up no matter what happened, always shedding the pure radiance of joy onto Walter. He wouldn’t trade anything in the world for the feeling.

[fatesdeepdive]

Entry 8: Rinkah’s Burning Loins

My Castle

After fully dedicating ourselves to Hoshido, the game finally really begins. We’re given access to a customizable castle in the Astral Plane where our army waits between battles. We can talk to our units, giving them minor stat boosts or new weapons. Right off the bat, we have a farm and spring to give us resources, rooms for Corrin and Lilith, and a Hall of Records.

In Lilith’s spring, we can feed her to make her level up. Different foods affect her stats in different ways. Note that, although Lilith now has stats, she isn’t usable in battle. Other players can invade our Castle through spotpass, which I’ll discuss in a later entry, and Lilith is only usable in those battles.

Lilith

Lilith is a weird squirrel dragon thing that floats around clutching a random ball. She used to be our stable girl and is now our pet. I think she has a crush on Corrin. Her design is unique and cute, I like it. Gameplay wise, she can only use a modified Physic staff. I don’t dislike her personality, but she feels like a throwaway character added at the last minute. She raises a ton of questions that I doubt will ever be answered.

In the Hall of Records, we can see descriptions of all the units we’ll ever recruit, rewatch cutscenes, read unreadable poems, and play around with a relationship tester. The relationship tester is randomized, by the way, which kinda makes it pointless. That said, it told me that Corrin expects betrayal from Rinkah, while Rinkah’s loins are set afire by Corrin. This is now canon, I have decided.

In Corrin’s room, we can change their hairstyle and invite an ally over to chill. I chose Kaze. He complimented Corrin’s piano skills, which she apparently has, then stared at us, blushing, while thanking us for saving him from Garon.

So, let’s talk about the elephant in the room. In the Japanese version you get to rub units while in close up mode. Like Pokemon Amie except...with people. This was removed in the English version. A lot of Fire Emblem fans were pissed, crying about censorship because Nintendo of America had the gall to remove the minigame where you rub Camila’s tiddies while she moans. And I’m going to say a hot take right now: they made the right call. That stuff was weird and indulgent. It was the living embodiment of the fanservice focussed design that plagues modern Fire Emblem games. Good riddance.

Inviting allies to Corrin’s cool sex treehouse boosts our support levels. I suppose it's time I mentioned that. In Fire Emblem games, units form bonds from fighting next to each other, unlocking short conversations that flesh them out as characters. Units also fight together better when they have high supports. Now, here’s the fun thing about supports:

There are more than 600 supports in this game. Not support conversations, support lines, each of which is made up of three or four conversations. And, because God has cursed me for my hubris and my work is never finished, I’m going to read all of them.

Admittedly, I’m not going to unlock all of them. S-Rank conversations result in marriages and each unit only gets one. It’d take a few dozen playthroughs to get all of Corrin’s S-Rank conversations and I don’t hate myself that much, so I’m reading the transcripts from the wiki. I think I’m going to do four supports per Entry; that’ll leave me with a few extra by the time we reach the end, but I’ll just do a support grab bag entry or something.

Before we do supports, let’s finish up improving the castle. I built a weapon shop and a statue of Corrin that boosts her max speed. We are limited on the number of buildings we can build, but that isn’t a big deal yet because the only other option was to build a stave shop.

Support: Corrin/Rinkah

C: Corrin attempts to discuss battle tactics with Rinkah, but Rinkah blows her off and tells her to stop trying to be friends. Rinkah does acknowledge that Corrin’s authority and that Corrin saved her life, but tells the princess leave her alone.

B: Corrin pesters Rinkah until she explains why she’s so aloof. Rinkah explains that, the Flame Tribe keeps a great flame burning in the center of the village to honor the God of Fire. In the past, outsiders have extinguished the fire. One such instance was followed by a volcanic eruption that decimated the tribe. As a rule, the people of the Flame Tribe are wary of outsiders. Rinkah also explains that she’s working for Hoshido because her father commanded her to, much to her chagrin.

A: Rinkah explains that she would have preferred to die an honorable warrior’s death than be captured and resents Corrin for sparing her. Corrin says that she’s glad Rinkah is still alive, because it means Rinkah and her can be friends. Corrin also says that, despite the chaos of war, she believes in fate and its ability to bring people together. Corrin encourages Rinkah to use this opportunity to learn more about the outside world and bring that knowledge home with her. Rinkah begrudgingly agrees.

This is how the conversation will end on my playthrough, but if Corrin has a penis, you can get an S-Rank proposal conversation. I’ll be listing all of these off along with the normal conversations.

S: Rinkah comes to Corrin, blushing, and tells him that he has been a constant reminder of her shame and regret over being captured. But, over time, these feelings were replaced with love. Love that she hated, because Corrin is an outsider. Corrin says that he’s loved Rinkah since the day they met and only told her to be friendly to other people as an excuse to spend time with her. Rinkah states that, from now on, she will remember her capture as the happiest day of her life and the two get married.

Review: I really like this support line. It expands Rinkah’s backstory and culture, ties it into Corrin’s own isolation and belief in fate, and deals with the tumultuous meeting they had in Chapter 2. The confession comes out of nowhere, admittedly, but I do like Rinkah grappling with her mixed feelings of hate and love. Solid support.

Support: Corrin/Jakob

C: Corrin comes to Jakob to ask for a favor. Jakob interrupts her by humorously listing off the things he would do for Corrin. Things like slay dragons for her, which is actually kinda offensive now that I think about it. Corrin begs Jakob to allow her to be independent and Jakob refuses. Corrin explains that she’s his boss and he tells her that servitude is his reason for living. Jakob explains that, when he started working for Corrin, he was incompetent, and her kindness towards him made him indebted to her. The two compromise on the agreement that Jakob will teach Corrin how to make tea. After Corrin leaves, Jakob mumbles to himself that things might get apocalyptic.

B: Corrin repeatedly tries and fails to make a decent cup of tea. Both of them get some funny lines in, with Corrin telling Jakob that she can’t hear him because she’s ignoring him and Jakob saying that, saying that they’ll run out of leaves before Corrin makes decent tea. They meaning the nation in this case. Corrin eventually makes a passable cup, after Jakob secretly adds in sugar.

A: Jakob admits to Corrin that he messed with her tea and she laughs it off, admitting that she knew all along. She apologizes for being stubborn and accepts that she still needs Jakob’s help sometimes. Jakob says that he falls apart without Corrin. Corrin says that the two of them are alike in that way and Jakob literally faints from joy.

S: Jakob is acting more distant than normal. When Corrin asks him about this, he admits that he’s fallen for her and resigns from his duties as butler, because it is improper for him to have feelings for his mistress. Corrin begs him to say because she needs him and admits that she loves him too. The two of them get embarrassed and Corrin fires Jakob, giving him the new job of husband.

Review: This was a hilarious support that really made me appreciate Jakob’s snarky yet loyal personality. He is the perfect butler. The conflict of Corrin wanting to be independent and Jakob wanting to take care of her is a good dynamic that made me appreciate the relationship between these two characters. I do like them more as a platonic couple than a romantic one, but Jakob quitting his job because falling in love with Corrin is improper is a nice character moment.

Support: Corrin/Kaze

C: A villager gives Kaze a bunch of radishes because he’s super hot. And I mean, he is. Kaze apparently doesn’t realize that he’s hot until Corrin explains it to him. Kaze mentions that he dislikes the attention because he isn’t a good person before running off.

B: Corrin asks Kaze to follow her around so she can figure out what’s bothering him. Kaze says no, so Corrin annoys him until he agrees to hang out with him. Then he runs away again.

A: Kaze admits to Corrin that it was his fault that Garon kidnapped her, because when he was a child, he noticed the Nohrian soldiers that killed Sumeragi were in the city but said nothing about it. I don’t know how that makes Corrin’s kidnapping his fault, you’d expect there to be soldiers guarding a king. And the fact that Kaze was there means that there were also Hoshido soldiers, which means there was no reason to be suspicious of the Nohrians. Also, Kaze was a teenager at the oldest, so he should probably get some leeway. Whatever. Kaze apologizes to Corrin and Corrin, in turn, apologizes for making him live with guilt for fifteen years. Corrin also points out that Kaze led her home, meaning that they’re even now. Kaze compares Corrin to Mikoto because of her kindness and pledges to serve Corrin as her loyal retainer.

S: Corrin and Kaze joke around about Corrin’s kidnapping. It’s cute. Corrin mentions that, now that she’s spent so much time offscreen with Kaze, she likes him even more. Kaze blurts out that he loves Corrin, despite being her bodyguard, and the two propose.

Review: I found this chain a bit lacking, to be honest. The first two conversations were filler and the origin for Kaze’s guilt complex is kinda dumb. Kaze’s relationship with Corrin defines him as a character. He is so guilt ridden over her kidnapping that he would betray his country and his family to protect her. Later parts of the game hinge on this relationship. But, three of their four conversations are dull. I do like Kaze’s guilt complex as a concept, and think becoming Corrin’s retainer alongside Jakob and/or Felicia and a way to repent, but it isn’t enough to save this support line.

Support: Kaze/Rinkah

C: Kaze gets a bunch of candy for being hot and shares it with Rinkah, who secretly loves candy.

B: Kaze continues to give Rinkah candy.

A: Kaze continues to give Rinkah candy.

S: Kaze reveals that he’s been giving Rinkah candy because he’s in love with her.

Review: This one was a big let down. The fact that Kaze and Rinkah are introduced together made me think it would be about their capture, but no. It’s just Kaze giving Rinkah candy for four conversations straight. And it’s cute fluff, but it’s nothing more than that. There is something interesting below the surface with Rinkah hiding her love of candy to protect her image, but it’s never really explored.

So, off to a mixed start with the support conversations.

Birthright Chapter 7: A Vow Upheld

Team Corrin heads to a Hoshidan fort where Sakura is tending to wounded soldiers. We are introduced to Sakura’s retainers, Subaki and Hana. Suddenly, the fort is attacked by Nohrian forces. Corrin and Azura point out the ridiculousness of them attacking immediately after they arrived. Sakura freaks out because the fort is being used as a hospital and has no military value. So apparently Nohr is now being evil just to be evil.

Subaki and Hana agree to help Corrin defend the fort and argue over who’s more important to Sakura, much to her annoyance. Subaki and Hana give me a good opportunity to discuss a few interesting things about classes in this game. First off, unlike in most Fire Emblem games, classes are NOT gender-specific, as demonstrated by Subaki being the first male Pegasus Knight in the series. Secondly, the classic Fire Emblem classes were divided between the two nations. Nohr got Mercenaries, Hoshido got Myrmidons. Nohr got Wyvern Riders, Hoshido got Pegasus Knights. Etc. I really like this, it gives the two countries different feels in combat both aesthetically and mechanically. Finally, a lot of Hoshidan classes were renamed to be more Eastern, shown by Hana being a Samurai instead of a Myrmidon, or by Sakura being a Shrine Maiden instead of a Cleric.

Subaki

Subaki is a Sky Knight, this game’s equivalent of a Pegasus Knight. He can fly over terrain and has good speed and resistance, but is decimated by arrows. His personal skill buffs his hit and avoid when he has full health. Design wise, I like how ridiculously smug he looks. Personality wise, he seems over-competitive yet fiercely loyal to Sakura.

Hana

Hana is a Samurai with high speed and skill. Her personal skill damaged nearby enemies when she scores a kill. Her design is fine, if a little bland. Personality wise, she seems over-competitive yet fiercely loyal to Sakura.

Starting with this chapter, we have a prep menu, where we can choose which units to use and rearrange them on the map. We can bring our whole team in with us, so it’s a little pointless, but it's nice. Worth noting that you can have units start in pair up via this menu, unlike in Awakening where you had to pair them up after the battle started.

At the start of the battle, the chapter’s boss, a Cavalier named Silas, shouts out to Corrin that he’s her childhood best friend. She does not remember him even slightly. Okie dokie.

This map is decent. It’s a bit short, but it features a lot of good bottlenecks. The Dragon Veins can be used to open heal tiles, which is a bit pointless because you have two healers. When Silas and Corrin fight, he reiterates that they used to be friends. Corrin says that she can’t remember her past. And that confuses me, because I was under the impression that she got amnesia when she was taken to Nohr, which would have been before she met Silas. Unless he’s lying.

After the battle, Corrin refuses to kill Silas. She interrogates him about why he was so hesitant to attack them and he explains that, when they were children, he helped Corrin sneak out of the walls to have a picnic. The guards tried to execute Silas for this, but Corrin stopped them, because apparently guards listen to small children. Because of this, Silas feels he owes a debt to Corrin.

Question. Why was this random child allowed to play with the super secret hostage princess? Whatever.

Corrin eventually recovers a vague memory of Silas and asks him to join the gang. She explains that Garon is crazy and evil and that’s enough to make him swap sides. Silas is now officially the most sane character in the game. I mean, he should have probably realized this stuff before being sent to destroy a hospital for shits and giggles, but still.

Also, Silas mentions that Corrin’s favorite food is surf and turf. Perhaps this symbolizes how Corrin is stuck between both kingdoms? Or maybe it’s a random throwaway line. You be the judge!

At the end of the chapter, Saizo and a new character named Orochi show up, wounded, and report that Takumi and Ryoma have gone missing. Uh oh.

Team Corrin decide to help search for the missing princes. Sakura decides to come along, despite Corrin and Kaze’s objections. Silas also decides to come along and Saizo points out that he totally could be a spy or traitor. He’s a dick, but he is infinitely smarter than Kaze.

[profitinaecho]

Should’ve Been a Cowboy

Liz could always tell when Max had been watching a western because he got a certain swagger. He had definitely been on a western kick lately because he was even starting to talk deeper like John Wayne. But then, the aliens were programmed to mimic the culture and speech patterns of any humans they encountered. Max’s birthday was coming up and Liz was going to surprise him with a couples trail ride at one of the local ranches. The ranch owner had come into the Crashdown that morning and Liz had asked for a favor. Max always claimed to have an affinity for horses. He was going to be so excited.

Sneaking up behind Max, Liz tiptoed until she was just behind him. Throwing her hands over his eyes from behind the couch, she deepened her voice and said “Guess who?”

Max didn’t even flinch. “Could it be my gorgeous, intelligent girlfriend? Who is literally the only other person in the house? By the way, I could feel your approach through the handprint.”

“I’d say we should stop doing that in bed to restore the mystery but I don’t want to give up our special hand print time.” Liz wrapped her arms around his neck from behind and rested her cheek against his. “I got you a birthday surprise.” Max tilted his head to kiss her cheek. “Saturday morning, we’re going on a couples trail ride.”

“Really? I have an affinity for horses.” Max was excited. He swore he had an inner cowboy.

Liz giggled at his joy. “Have you ever actually ridden a horse?”

“I live in New Mexico. Of course I’ve ridden a horse. Mom used to take me and Isobel for lessons when we were little. I always thought I would have one one day.”

Coming around the couch, Liz perched in Max’s lap and he automatically wrapped his arms around her to steady her. “What are we watching?”

“Walker, Texas Ranger.”

————————————-

Saturday morning, Liz woke Max up with a special birthday blowjob then rolled out of bed to make him his favorite type of omelette. After breakfast, they got dressed in wrangler jeans and black ariat boots. Liz wore a purple blouse with a matching belt with a purple and black belt buckle. Max wore a blue button up shirt with his black belt and big square silver belt buckle. He finished his look off with his favorite cowboy hat.

“What, no spurs?” Liz teased him.

“Not today.” Max smiled at her and his eyes crinkled. “We’re going to have the best time. Thank you, Liz.”

————————————-

“This is Tuff. He will be your mount today.” The blonde ranch hand handed Max the reins to a stocky palomino. Max patted the large horse’s neck and let him sniff his hand. “And this is Silk” The ranch hand handed Liz the reins to a smutty buckskin. “The horses know the trail so all you have to do is hang on. They’re good horses.”

Max came up behind Liz to help her up on her horse. “Bend your left leg and keep it bent. I’m going to give you a boost. Ready? 1… 2…” On 3, Max lifted Liz easily and she swung her leg up over the dappled desert colored mare. Max helped her adjust her stirrups then turned to get up on his own horse. He put his left foot in the stirrup and swung his right leg up over the saddle. Max clicked his tongue and his horse walked forward, swishing his flaxen mane at a fly. Liz’s horse followed and side by side they headed down the trail.

The horses' heads bobbed in rhythm to their steps and the leather saddles squeaked each time they trotted for a few paces. Tuff’s ears flopped back and forth as he moved while Silk kept her ears pinned close to her head to remind everyone who was running this show. In Silk’s mind, it was definitely her. They rode side by side for an hour talking about their hopes and dreams and enjoying each other's company. Under a large oak tree, Max and Liz found themselves leaning towards each other and kissing. Max stroked Liz’s cheek tenderly and smiled so big his eyes crinkled. “Do you remember what I said to you our first night together?”

“Echos” Liz smiled at him coyly.

“Before that.”

“It isn’t THAT big? That was a lie by the way.” Liz’s forehead crinkled in concentration. Max’s member was out of this world. Liz was no virgin and had never seen anything like it, not that she was complaining.

Max laughed at her confusion. “Before that.”

Liz played with the hair at the nape of his neck and bit her lip as she thought. “Oh! That we didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to. But I wanted to. You had to know by that point that I was going to make love to you.”

“I hoped. Of course, I hoped. But it wasn’t an expectation. I would have been happy just kissing you or to have your mouth on me.” Max closed his eyes thinking about the first time he slid into her warm heat. “I was so nervous and it was so much more than I deserved.”

“Oh, Max. I was nervous too. I knew it was going to change my life because I could never be without you again.” She pecked his lips twice.

“My point is, that I will only ever take what you offer willingly and only if it makes you feel good. That goes for everything.” Max cleared his throat. He was getting emotional thinking about his girlfriend again. “Thank you for giving me the perfect birthday. I love you.”

“I love you too. Forever.” Liz smiled happily back at him, her long dark hair waving in the wind.

“Always.” Max promised. They shifted back in their saddles away from each other. He urged his blonde horse forward and they headed back to the barn.

[camillemontespan]

sports day [drake walker x camille montespan x lily]

Just a one shot I dreamt up. No reason for this other than it’s Sunday fluff. 

 @jovialyouthmusic​ @sirbeepsalot @pug-bitch @moonlightgem7 @fromthedeskofpaisleybleakmore @emceesynonymroll @dcbbw @iplaydrake @drakewalkerisreal @notoriouscs @i-bloody-love-drake-walker @katedrakeohd @rainbowsinthestorm

      ********************************************************************

'Okay, Lily, how are you feeling?' Camille asked her daughter. Lily jumped up and down, clapping her hands. 'Excited!'

It was her schools Sports Day. At five years old, it was her first one and she couldn't contain her joy.

Drake and Camille had chosen for Lily to attend a 'normal' school in Valtoria. It was still a prestigious institution but there were no other noble children there. Many had criticised their decision, believing it would only serve to make Lily unaware of how to navigate courtly life and lacking in the skills to be a Duchess when she was older, but her parents had been adamant - Drake more so. He wanted his daughter to grow up with no frills and to experience a normal childhood. He wanted her to have commoner friends to keep her grounded.

Drake brought over three bottles of water and handed two of them to his wife and daughter. 'Ready to go, champ?' he asked Lily. Lily nodded and began to do star jumps.

'Is she warming up?' Camille whispered to Drake.

'Looks like it..'

'There's my little sports star!'

They turned to see Maxwell and Bertrand walking towards them. Maxwell was beaming. 'You ready to win some medals?!' he hollered.

Lily ran towards her Uncle Max and he pulled her into a bear hug. Lily then broke away to hug Uncle Bertrand who crouched down to talk to her face to face.

'Now, Lily. This is the most important day of your life,' he told her seriously. 'As an honorary Beaumont, you must know we don't do things by halves. We go all in. What do we do?'

'We go all in!' Lily repeated, her face serious too. 

Camille bit her lip. 'Honey, it's the taking part that counts, you don't have to win, it's meant to be fun.'

Bertrand stared at the Duchess. 'Camille, have you forgotten about the suitor competition you were competing in six years ago? We. Go. All. In.'

'Yeah but she rejected Liam and married me so..' Drake said, shifting on his feet awkwardly.

'I meant in terms of the regatta and such,' Bertrand explained. 'Sporting events.'

Lily was then distracted, her eyes going wide. 'Uncle Leo!'

Olivia and Leo were walking towards the group, Leo's arm was slung around Olivia's shoulder. He was wearing aviators, a brown leather jacket, white fitted t-shirt, jeans and boots. Olivia was dressed in leather trousers, a low cut red top and stiletto heels. They both looked so out of place, like they should be in LA or something.  

Lily ran towards Leo. 'There's my pretty girl!' he laughed, picking her up and turning her upside down.

Leo held her by the ankles as he strode over to the group before setting Lily down. 'You been practicing your warm ups?' he asked her.

'Star jumps and stretches!' Lily told him.

Camille blinked. 'Why is everyone taking this so seriously like it's life or death?'

Drake chuckled and squeezed her hand. 'I'm not. This is just a fun day out to me.'

Camille smiled up at him. 'I swear, you keep me sane.'

Lily was looking up at Olivia, entranced. Any time she saw her godmother, she was rendered speechless at how glamorous she was. Olivia was her idol. 'Auntie Olivia, do you think I'll win?'

Olivia crouched down to talk to her. 'Babe, I know you will. You just show those fuckers who's boss - '

'OLIVIA!' Camille and Drake both burst out.

Olivia looked up at them, a look of boredom on her face. 'What?'

Lily looked up at her parents. 'Mommy, daddy, what are fuckers?'

Drake pressed his fingers against the bridge of nose. 'So help me God..' he muttered. Camille looked furious.

'You can't swear in front of our daughter!' she hissed.

Olivia smirked. 'Camille, that's nothing! Could have been worse, I could have called them cun-'

Leo clapped his hand over his girlfriends mouth. 'Okaaaay babe, let's get you a drink!'

He led Olivia away, keeping hold of her tightly so she wouldn’t trip over the grass in her heels. Drake and Camille focused back on Lily, who was now doing burpees.

‘Who the hell taught her how to do burpees?’ Drake asked, staring at his daughter with a bewildered expression on his face.

‘You’re welcome!’ Leo shouted over his shoulder. 

Camille sighed. ‘Lils, lets go to your teammates. Can you see the yellow team anywhere?’

Lily scanned the field. ‘There! I see Violet and Harper!’ 

Camille took her hand and the two of them wandered over to the yellow team. Drake smiled as he watched them go. This was exactly the kind of childhood he had hoped for Lily and he was so glad she was experiencing normality. 

‘Hey Drake!’ 

Hana arrived beside Drake carrying a tray of brownies. Drake hungrily looked at the baked goods and Hana giggled. ‘Do you want one?’

Drake reddened and cleared his throat. ‘Nah, those are for the kids.’

‘I won’t tell.’

Drake’s hand shot out to pick up a brownie and he shovelled it in his mouth. ‘Jesus, Hana, these taste like heaven.’

‘It’s my secret recipe!’ she said, giving him a wink. ‘Where’s Lily? I want to give these to her team.’

Drake pointed at Lily and said with his mouth full, ‘Over there.’

Hana joined Camille and Lily. Lily’s mouth dropped when she saw the brownies and the rest of her team mates crowded around to try them. She was going to be the popular one today.

                         *********************************************************

‘YES LILY! Keep going!’ Bertrand shouted. He was right at the sidelines studying Lily’s efforts during the wheelbarrow race. Violet was holding her legs and Lily was driving them forward on her hands, keeping her body off the ground. 

They were currently third out of eight teams which was a great start. Lily’s face was set in concentration as she tried to be the best wheelbarrow she could be. 

‘You guys are amazing!’ Hana squealed, clapping her hands. ‘You can do it!’

Camille was cheering her daughter on while Drake took photos on his phone. 

‘She is taking this so seriously, isn’t she?’ he said, smiling. Camille rolled her eyes. 

‘Thanks to her uncles and aunties.’

‘She’ll win, Camille.’

‘I know but if she doesn’t, I don’t want her getting sad,’ Camille told him. ‘She always puts so much pressure on herself.’

Drake brought Camille in for a hug. ‘If she loses -and that’s a big if- we’ll buy her McDonalds on the way home. A dinner for champions, okay?’

Camille smiled. ‘That would be perfect either way.’ 

                         *******************************************************

‘Pretend it’s a crown!’ Bertrand instructed from the sidelines. Lily was balancing a  small rubber ring on her head and walking, trying to keep it balanced.  ‘Wear the crown! Be the crown!’

‘Is someone usurping me?’

The group turned to see Liam standing behind them, a warm smile on his features. ‘Hey guys, sorry I’m late.’ 

The rest of the parents were staring. The King was at their school’s sports day. What. The. Hell. 

His bodyguards were in attendance but aside from that, no fanfare had been made of his arrival. Drake handed him a bottle of water. ‘Good to see you, man.’ 

Leo clapped his brother on the back. ‘You still free this weekend for the Beaumont Bash? Maxwell’s planned a rager.’

‘A Beaumont Bash is always a rager,’ Olivia said. Maxwell beamed. ‘This is the best rager yet.’

Liam chuckled and shrugged. ‘Yeah, I’m still coming. Nothing too heavy, though. I have duties the next day.’

‘Nothing you can’t do hungover at your desk!’ Leo quipped. 

They all turned back to watch Lily who had managed to make it to the finish line with the rubber ring still on her head. They began to cheer, but were overshadowed in enthusiasm by Bertrand, who was ecstatic. 

‘Oh, Camille, I can’t wait to give her etiquette lessons when she’s older!’ he cried. 

‘Aww Bertrand, you softie!’ she said, squeezing him against her. Bertrand wrapped his arm around her shoulder and continued to watch his future student. ‘She is so like you,’ he whispered.

‘Yeah but she’s got Drake’s smirk,’ she replied. 

‘Oh, I’m aware!’ Bertrand laughed. 

The sports teacher blew into her whistle. ‘Time for lunch!’ she announced. 

Camille picked up the food box she had brought with her. She had made sandwiches for each of Lily’s teammates and included orange juice and chocolate bars for a sugar boost. Lily took her mother’s hand when she saw her and helped Camille distribute sandwiches. 

‘Lils, let’s top up your sun cream,’ Camille said. ‘We don’t want you burning.’

Lily sighed but obliged. Camille smothered her skin in sun cream before adding a little blob to the tip of her nose. ‘There!’ 

Lily rubbed her nose and sat down on the grass to eat her lunch with her friends. Violet was looking sad because she wasn’t performing so well. 

‘Violet, you’re so, so, so good,’ Lily told her. ‘Like, you were the best at helping me be a wheelbarrow.’ 

‘Yeah but I still suck at everything else.’

‘No you don’t. Here, have a chocolate bar.’

Lily handed her a chocolate bar and Violet took it gratefully. Camille watched her daughter with a sense of pride. 

         *****************************************************************************

‘Last event of the day!’ the teacher bellowed. ‘The relay race! First team mate runs with the batton and passes it to their waiting team mate until the batton reaches the final person who must get it to the finish line to win the trophy!’

‘Ooooooh!’ the children chorused. 

The teams assembled. Lily was placed to be the final team mate to receive the batten. To get to the finish line first was a big responsibility, huge actually, and she had to get there. 

The teacher blew her whistle and Lily’s team mate, Harper, was off running towards Milo. ‘Come on, Harper!’ Lily screamed. 

Maxwell and Hana were pretending to be cheerleaders on the sidelines. ‘Give me an L!’ Maxwell sang. 

They made an L shape with their arms. 

‘Give me an I!’ 

They began to spell out Lily’s name as Milo ran towards Violet with the batton. 

‘Do you think Milo has a crush on Lily?’ Camille asked Drake. ‘He kept blushing every time she spoke to him at lunch.’

Drake stared at Milo. ‘And so it starts...’ he muttered.

‘Drake..’ Camille sighed, a warning in her voice. ‘He’s five.’

‘Still a boy. Still has a dick.’

‘Drake!’ she hissed.

‘Go Violet! You’re flying!’ Lily shouted, cheering on her friend who had now been passed the batton. Violet ran towards Lily, holding out the batton. 

Lily grabbed it and turned to run towards the finish line. Her dark hair blew in the wind as she ran, clutching the batton as tightly as she could. 

‘You can do it, girl!’ Leo hollered, his fist in the air. ‘Remember our training!’

Lily kept running, the finish line in sight. This field was so long. 

Then she tripped.

The batton flew out of her hands and she landed with a thump on the grass. Winded, she lay there still for a moment.  Everyone went silent. Camille clapped her hand to her mouth and was about to rush over but was beaten to it by Drake, who was already racing towards his daughter. 

He knelt down and gently inspected Lily, who was whimpering. 

‘Honey, are you hurt?’

She nodded, her lip trembling.

‘Where?’

‘My ankle, it hurts..’

Drake wrapped his arms around his daughter to lift her up but she shook her head. ‘No daddy, I want to finish the race.’

‘You’re hurt-’

‘Daddy, please,’ she whispered, tears filling her eyes. 

Drake sighed and looked to where the finish line was. It wasn’t far at all. Well, to him anyway. But he was 6′4 and a fully grown adult. 

‘Okay, honey. Let’s finish the race,’ he whispered. ‘Get on my shoulders.’ 

He helped Lily onto his shoulders and he slowly stood up. ‘Ready, champ?’ 

She sniffled and rubbed her eyes before studying the finish line with a new determination.  Her eyes narrowed. ‘Let’s go, daddy.’

Carrying Lily on his shoulders, Drake began to run towards the finish line. Camille and their friends burst out cheering, along with the other parents who were applauding. Camille ran along the sidelines, keeping the pace with Drake, watching this unfold.  ‘YES MY BABIES!’ she screamed. 

Lily was laughing now as Drake ran closer to the finish line. Violet and Harper were jumping up and down, cheering them on. 

Drake reached the finish line and everyone began to shout his name. Lily squealed in delight, her hurt ankle forgotten. 

       *************************************************************************

The green team came first, followed by the red team. Lily’s team came fifth, which meant they were awarded chocolate coin medals. 

But Lily was given a plastic medal from the teacher who had inspected her ankle. Lily lined up with the others who had plastic medals to have photos taken and she held hers aloft.

‘I GOT A MEDAL FUCKERS!’

Everyone went quiet, except for Olivia who sniggered. ‘That’s my girl.’

[artyrogue]

Blind Date Gaming: Race Days

Oof. The perils of blind dating present themselves in the randomness of your match. Sometimes you get a win and hit it off with your date; sometimes, invariably, you get paired with a bad fit. Today's date was a major blast of the latter. But I get ahead of myself. Let's focus on what my date had to offer during our long night together.

Oh, hello there, Race Days! As the name hints, it's a racing game. Now, I'm really not much for racing games. They never clicked with me much, and thus I have little experience with them. Perhaps this title will be the one that changes my mind a bit?

So this game is actually two in one. The first game is 4 Wheel Drive, one of those first-person driving games where 60% of your action space is the dashboard of a car. At least in this game you see the track map, I guess? It's like having an oldschool GPS in your car long before Google Maps was a thing!

17th place. Because we need 18 vehicles in our racing game for some reason? What is even the color of a participation ribbon for that rank?

Well, it starts off rough. Like 4 FPS rough. You slog through the slow-updating track, driving a chunky jeep around 17 other chunky jeeps in an... err... 'adrenaline-pumping' race. Your primary salvation here is that you get on-screen cues for turns. Without that, I probably would have ended up on some toll road without cash, resulting in some passive aggressive bills being sent to me in the mail. Honestly, though, you'll be paying attention to these signals more than the road since the road blends into the offroad area pretty seamlessly. Only the crappy sound effects will tell you that you're off the pavement.

See this? There's only 1 lane here. The rest is dust or something? Good thing they painted divider lines in the desert.

The other jeeps don't present much challenge, though maybe it was because I was playing in easy mode. Hey, don't judge! I know my weaknesses and play around them! Still, they do have weird hit boxes. Or maybe it's YOUR jeep that has a weird hit box? Perhaps this truck I'm in is some weird import made to host a whole party in the back, thus it's much wider in the body. Well, whatever, this party sucks and my jeep needs to go on a diet. I guess it'll be lighter fuel from now on!

You CAN sort of total your jeep if you act like a goon and keep ramming NPCs. Hope you have good insurance!

So that's basically it, I guess. Due to time constraints, I only played one set of tracks. None of them were particularly memorable or fun to drive on. There are no real mechanics that make this game stand out unless you're looking for a racing game with invisible tracks. I did ace the cup, though, so I guess I have a new trophy at my drab-colored ranch house in the 'burbs on Minnesota (or wherever Jeep-owners usually live).

Man, Duke Nukem needs to find a tailor and should look up proper wine-bottle-toting form

Okay! On to game #2! This game is...HUAGH!

I wouldn't flaunt your graphics team here, chaps

Ohhh-kay, so that's a bold choice of visual presentation right off the bat. This beaut is called Dirty Racin', which I assume might be like Dirty Dancing? Probably doesn't have any romance though, unless it's got like Nascar fans severely crushing on Dale Earnhardt the third. Is there a third one? I assume Nascar drivers have titles like the Dread Pirate Roberts or something. Maybe not. (Apologies if I have insulted racing fans somehow; disclaimer: I'm severely out of my element here.)

Does...does the driver lie down in there? How does he even fit inside?

Like in 4 Wheel Drive, you get to choose a difficulty. After the ease of Jeep Racing Simulator 2000, I decided to be adventurous and go with 'Hazardous'. I don't want to disappoint the cool dude on the options screen who is constructed out of straight lines by choosing easy mode. But wow, that guy is entirely made out of straight lines. The art team here clearly earned their keep.

It takes almost a full bottle of gel every morning to get his bangs at perfect angles like that

So what's this racing game about? Overhead racetracks, apparently. It's you and 3 other cars on a bunch of different tracks, trying your best to outmaneuver each other for a coveted first place victory. Unfortunately, there's only 2 lanes of space, though, so you end up colliding with your opposition all over the place.

Luckily for me, the first couple races just require you to not get last place. I hate the controls in games like this, so I am naturally terrible at this game. I pull through and squeak a third place due to dumb luck, though. Then I'm greeted by some amazing sex idol racing queen that is in no way poorly drawn and clearly epitomizes the breast part about racing. I mean best part. Best part! She offers me car upgrades with the coins I found lying along the racetrack. Let's ignore how a speeding car can safely pick up these caches of money.

Uhh, hey pumpkin, can you move your elbow there? What are you even leaning on?

After this, I travel to the next event, which is a series of 3 races. I have to place first overall to win and unlock more tracks on the map. Okay! Let's do this!

Mmyep, I got 4th place each time. Ok, try again!

...Alright, once more! I think I have the hang of things a bit! I got third once!

Nope, this bites

After a series of horrible losses, I tried to back out and see what else I could play. I mean, there was a second direction to go; maybe the other track is better? But no, the game over screen only lets you try the same race again or quit entirely. So you either have to grind it out and win on that specific map or you have to start over from the beginning. Excellent news. Well, I opted to flee and try a lower difficulty. Surely I can make some ground h-

Yeah, screw this game

I gave up after noticing the AI isn't remotely different in the lower difficulty. Moreover, I started fuming and compounding a list of things I hate about this game! What a joy to be spending time with it. Please let me rant and release this pent up anger. It's therapeutic and I need to vent worse than a racecar with an overheating engine.

All opponents have better handling and stats than you. You need to upgrade your car to even be at the same level as them.

All bumps, be they into walls or other cars, up your damage meter; more damage means a malfunctioning car. You CAN get damage fixed after a race for cash, but doing so pretty much depletes your funds and you get no upgrades. Which means you're STILL at a disadvantage over your opponents.

You always start at fourth place. This means you have to contend with 3 other cars hogging the road space, blocking you and making it hard to get a foothold.

You can't replay levels you beat. This means no grinding for coins or leveling up.

There are only two single races available at the start, both of which have the low bar of making third or higher. After doing those, you MUST do a 'win 1st place in these three races' level to progress.

You can activate nitro for a quick boost, but it's pretty useless since the AI almost immediately activates their own and overtakes you with their better handling and blocking.

Opponents seem to gain higher speed if they're behind you. Like, their non-nitro max speed actually increases, so they easily overtake you.

You can bump into special flashing walls for powerups, but some of them are useless. The best one gives you superspeed for the rest of the match, but it's so fast I can't control it well. I just ended up bumping into walls like mad and upping my damage, all the while having the AI overtake me anyway.

Whew. So there's that embarrassment. I'm sure some of you are laughing at me since this game is probably child's play, but I just can't do it. The GameFAQs guide even says that all difficulty modes are super-easy, so it must just be me. I never got higher than third place. In the end, this was a steaming pile of garbage for me that I wouldn't date again if it was the last form of entertainment left in the world. Not even Upgrade Lady can sway my decision to let this one die forever in a horrible roadside crash. (Okay, so that definitely offended some of you; apologies again!) Take this Sprite of Passage and forget about this game forever. Don't worry, it deserves it.

what else did you expect to be the Sprite of Passage?

[othersportsnews-blog]

Seattle Mariners ace Felix Hernandez on changing to the U.S. and understanding English

New Post has been published on https://othersportsnews.com/seattle-mariners-ace-felix-hernandez-on-changing-to-the-u-s-and-understanding-english/

Seattle Mariners ace Felix Hernandez on changing to the U.S. and understanding English

eight:00 AM ET

Marly RiveraESPN Writer

Near

Marly Rivera is a writer for ESPNdeportes.com and ESPN.com.

This job interview was performed in Spanish and has been translated.

Considering the fact that Felix Hernandez manufactured his MLB debut at just 19 a long time previous, he has turn out to be 1 of the most fearsome rivals in the key leagues. “King Felix” is a six-time All-Star, a few-time Cy Younger finalist and fourth-greatest active pitcher in WAR (51.9) — but when he arrived to the U.S. at sixteen, he failed to know how to order food stuff outside of a buffet. Hernandez spoke with Marly Rivera about changing to the U.S., understanding to pitch, and boosting his young children in a design and style so different from his personal upbringing.

Béisbol Encounter is ESPN’s time-extended look at how the sport and Latino society intersect.

Far more from Béisbol Encounter: • Introducing Béisbol Encounter / Bienvenidos a Béisbol Encounter • Manny Machado is the facial area of baseball’s new identity / En Contra de la Rutina • Béisbol Encounter 50-male job interview

What have you skipped participating in baseball below and not in Venezuela? It really is pretty different. You skip your family. When I arrived below in the United States at sixteen a long time previous, it was the initial time I was ever divided from my dad and mom. Not recognizing the language, not recognizing the society, it was fairly tricky. I had the prospect to enjoy in 2003 in Venezuelan winter league, and I returned very last calendar year. I had not played there in a extended time, and it can be seriously different. The Venezuelan enthusiast is pretty nervous, they want everything to be excellent, and 1 is human, 1 will make faults. Here people are calmer, extra passive. I consider which is the most important variation.

What was the toughest thing when you received below at sixteen? The toughest thing was to converse. Also buying food stuff. I skipped my family a great deal. I named my mom every single working day. I would communicate to her about everything, how it was around below, how we worked, it was seriously tough. But my mom just said to me, ‘Son, you determined to be a baseball player.’

Did you ever regret coming to the US because you skipped your family as well a great deal? Under no circumstances. It never crossed my intellect. Considering the fact that I was a child, I observed large leaguers participating in on tv and my mentality was constantly to be a large leaguer. That was my desire, to be like them. So it never crossed my intellect. I tried using to study English as immediately as achievable, and that helped me the most.

What did you do to strengthen your English? I constantly listened to Us citizens acquiring conversations. I constantly tried using to listen and study in the dialogue. I also watched a great deal of tv with no subtitles. An American player told me when you cannot be shy you cannot experience humiliated. If you say a little something wrong and an individual corrects you, you should not enable it hassle you, because which is what is actually greatest for you. That also helped me.

How extended did it get you to converse with coaches and teammates? It was a course of action. Like people say, I butchered it [laughs]. But in about two a long time I began to enable free.

And you could previously communicate to the push? It was tricky for me. I was shy. In my initial calendar year in the majors I had a translator. Immediately after that, I told them ‘I want to say what I feel’. They requested me if I felt cozy, and I said indeed, that I preferred to specific myself and say what I experience throughout the sport. The initial time speaking in English immediately after a sport I received a small anxious. Immediately after that, I received applied to acquiring a great deal of cameras around. As you begin obtaining applied to it, you can enable free and speak calmly.

You said it was tricky to order food stuff in advance of you acquired English. How did you check out? We would keep at a hotel close to our spring training complicated [in Peoria], at the Hampton Inn. Now it can be different because there’s a Starbucks, but in advance of there was a ‘Jack in the Box’, and I favored eating there. I acquired to order the ‘number seven,’ and I retained eating that for a extended time. It was a double cheeseburger that arrived with a coke and French fries. There were also many Venezuelans who had been there a extended time previously, so we helped each and every other out. From time to time we would take in at a buffet, and we favored it because we just had to get up and provide our personal food stuff and failed to have to communicate to any person.

Do you study, listen to tunes or desire to look at videos in Spanish? You have to stability it 50-50. I listen to Latin tunes and American tunes. I look at videos in English. I have developed pretty accustomed to lifestyle in the United States, while I like to journey to Venezuela.

Do you speak Spanish all the time at property? When the children are with my wife, they speak in Spanish. When they are with me, in particular when we are participating in, we occasionally speak in Spanish, occasionally in English, and Spanglish. If my son claims a little something to his mom, he constantly claims it in Spanish. We have a great deal of assortment. I considered that my youngest was not heading to speak Spanish pretty properly, but he seriously speaks it beautifully. When we go to Venezuela, my girl speaks only in Spanish, because she claims ‘Daddy, below they speak Spanish’.

Because you were a leading prospect, was your treatment method in the slight leagues different from other Latinos? The way they address you is different. It really is pretty, pretty different when you might be the leading prospect. They get treatment of you extra. They support you with everything. They you should not enable you enjoy winter ball. The way they address potential customers, it can be seriously different.

What was the most important shock for you when you went back again to enjoy baseball in Venezuela? When I initial pitched in Venezuela, I was not the exact pitcher I am now. I was only 17 a long time previous. The time I played there very last calendar year was pretty, pretty different. The supporters are different. Supporters are extraordinary. Some opinions cannot be recurring [laughs] but I relished it to the max, in particular when I played in Valencia, in my property city. My complete family was there. I had to get a great deal of tickets. The ambiance of that sport seriously was a little something stunning.

What is the most important variation between supporters in Venezuela and Seattle? The screams, the noise, the ambiance, the rudeness of some of the points said out there. They yell at you ‘strikeout, strikeout, strikeout’. It really is pretty different from American baseball. In Venezuela, baseball is also a supply of joy for the place proper now, because of all that is occurring. In a sport of baseball people can get pleasure from them selves and have exciting. I consider which is also why Venezuelan supporters have such enthusiasm.

What was the initial ‘luxury’ you acquired? Very first, we fixed my previous man’s property, for the complete family. I also acquired a car or truck that we all applied, a Ford Explorer. My father was a truck driver, so I also helped him established up a truck company for people to work for him. I received a fantastic bonus, so I also acquired some earrings.

How do you tackle what you have achieved and the economic situation you are in now? The most critical thing is to have humility and recognize what you have. It took a seriously large effort to get to wherever I am. I received below with a great deal of sweat off my brow no 1 has ever offered me just about anything. I have gained it. We will have to also be pretty grateful for the family that taught you what humility is. That is what is actually most critical.

How do you instruct your young children to recognize points, when they have never lacked just about anything? I am pretty passive with my young children. If they say ‘Daddy I want this,’ I give it to them. But my wife won’t. My wife has taught them a great deal. She’s the 1 who helps them the most to worth points. When we go to Venezuela she explains what is occurring in the place, and that we stay in the United States, but that points constantly have to be gained. She tells them that everything cannot be ‘Daddy, give me this and that’. Factors have to be gained, and they have to be pretty grateful for everything.

Because of what is actually occurring in Venezuela, do you have to be extra cautious when you journey? Incredibly a great deal so. I stroll around with a bodyguard. Which is the only way I can go out. It seriously hurts me to see the place in that problem, people who have nothing to take in, or who take in only when a working day. That hurts me a great deal.

I worry because my complete family is in Venezuela. But I cannot bring all of them all below. What can 1 do? I consider 1 must not get involved [in politics]. We have to wait around for a miracle to occur. It will get a extended time for Venezuela to return to wherever it was, but we are continue to self-confident that points will strengthen.

How did you study to take care of your cash? [When I was young] my mom and father handled my cash and despatched it to me via Western Union. They would deposit cash and I would get it out. [As an adult] my brokers helped me out with that. I understood a economic advisor for a player who was below, Eddie Guardado. He released me. I talked to him and he gave me a great deal of self esteem and he’s continue to operating with me. The most critical thing for me now is to consider about my young children, their university, their potential and that they can continue on living properly. That is why you have to have personal savings.

Hernandez pitched for his indigenous Venezuela in this year’s Planet Baseball Common. Orlando Ramirez/Usa Now Sporting activities

Do you consider of yourself as an individual who opened doors for other Venezuelan players? In my situation, indeed. But extended in advance of me, many other players opened doors a extended time in the past. All those were our heroes. We watched them enjoy baseball at this degree as supporters and we dreamed of becoming like them. I watched Freddie García and Pedro Martínez pitch a great deal. I liked the way they pitched.

Who taught you how to pitch? My brother, who was a pitching mentor. He played two a long time in the slight leagues but did not make it to the large leagues. We played every single working day on the porch of the property. We shattered all my mom’s glass home windows [laughs]. We constantly listened to her scolding us, but we retained on participating in. When I was small I also seriously favored to strike. So I would pitch in a sport and then would enjoy shortstop in a different sport.

Was your talent noticeable considering the fact that childhood or did it develop above time? You could see it from the beginning. But I was a slacker seriously lazy. What I preferred to do all the time was go to the courtroom to enjoy basketball. When I was 13 or fourteen a long time previous, there were a great deal of scouts who would appear to see me, so they would get my ID so I could not go to the courtroom to enjoy basketball.

I continue to get pleasure from participating in basketball, but not like in advance of. I am a super enthusiast of the NBA. I love it. My favored players are Dwyane Wade and Michael Jordan. Jordan is an idol for all of us. The greatest basketball player in the planet. Now it can be Lebron.

Have you previously told yourself ‘I manufactured it’? That second has not appear to me still. I have not told myself still that I achieved my desire. It has not transpired to me still. Possibly that second will appear when I retire. Perhaps I will look back again then and say ‘look at everything you did, all your numbers you did achieve your desire.’

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Instagramer Community!

We are extremely fortunate to have such a great customer base for our luxury beachwear for girls! Our customers reciprocate their feelings towards our luxury beachwear for girls by displaying their love via Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest and other sources of social media. We always take our time to hear what they have to say, however, in this unique situation we've decided to actively reach out to them about our luxury beachwear for girls and comment on girls fashion as well. We have made a commitment to make sure our customers is our number one priority. with that being said, our luxury beachwear for girls, girls fashion, designs, quality, sipping and customer service are the utmost importance to Stella Cove. To give credit where it is rightfully due we have put in some more time and diligence to our blog to reflect our beloved customers who have elevated our luxury beachwear for girls to a higher level. Gurks fashion is to be innovated by Stella Cove to raise the expectation of our customer and of course our competitors. We all know who has the best luxury beachwear for girls though!

Mai Tilson:

One of the many photographers that have snapped pictures of our luxury beachwear for girls! We decided to get her involved with our blog. She loves our brand, designs and of course luxury beachwear for girls!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

This is a hard question because I laugh all the time, but the last time I laugh so hard that I cried and I literally had to change my pants, it was one night I was going out to dinner with two of my friends, and I can’t remember why we started laughing but we couldn’t stop, and I was sitting by myself at the back and I was laying on the seat because I could not sit up straight from laughing so hard, then we all started snorting from the laughs and that made us laugh even more, then everything was hilarious! The next day I remember having sore abs from the laughing workout! haha

What’s your life motto/slogan?

I have a few that I tell my kids all the time: “Do what you have to do, so you can do what you want to do”  You hear this one a lot in my house at the moment, first comes school, homework, chores, do the work first, so we can play, have fun, spend time doing what we want, and in long term it means that if they want something for them in their life they need to work hard to reach it. “Always shoot for the stars” and “Anything is possible” I live my life by those and they have taken me on a fabulous journey so far.

What’s your favourite part about the brand?

I LOVE THE COLOURS and the beautiful prints on all the designs, from the pastels to the florals.

Melanie Hoad:

Melanie is a young model who makes our luxury beachwear for girls look especially fabulous! Her poses and and natural flow bring some added elegance to our luxury beachwear for girls.

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

My last laugh out loud moment was this morning when both our children walked into our bedroom at 6am, both Cleo and Duke had each dressed themselves, layered in seven individual pairs of swim suits each and put swimming goggles on both dogs (a border collie cross & standard poodle) and said to us ‘Mum and Dad….do you get our message, can you tell what we want to do today?’!  A hysterical way to start the day!

What's your life motto/ slogan?

There’s a saying that exists in our world which is that you can’t have fun every day.  I object!  Why not?  I believe that we should try to make everything we do as much fun as possible, even those things we may consider ordinary or mundane should have as much fun and laughter injected into them!  Life’s too short not to laugh and enjoy each moment as much as is humanly possible!  I make a point of laughter, humour and love – it makes the world go around and enriches your day.  Who has time to frown or feel down?  Not me!

What do you like most about the brand?

What’s not to like about Stella Cove?  To be more specific, I love the youthful vibe of the colourful prints created the brand as they hark of childhood dreams and imaginings!  They make me remember my childhood feelings of joy and encompass the freedom of youth!  The girls swim wear designs are beautifully feminine also, taking the girly vibe to a classy max whilst the boys swimwear is artfully and classically created with a timeless feel.  I also loved seeing Cleo and Duke’s faces light up when they saw Stella Cove garments for the first time – great big smiles all round!

Melanie makes all our luxury beachwear for girls look phenomenal! We are delighted when ever we are tagged in her photos!

Emma Kahle:

One of our beloved followers from our awesome Instagram page! She owns our luxury beachwear for girls! She actually submitted for selfies to us in one of our lovely bikinis!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

my last laugh out loud moment was a few days ago. my friend told me a really funny joke that made me laugh really hard!

What's your life motto/ slogan?

my life motto is "be yourself because everyone is already taken."

What do you like most about the brand?

There are so many things to love about stella cove! I love the prices, quality ect but my most favorite thing are the patterns!!! they are insanely cute and appropriate.

These are the type of followers which make our community special! The girls and boys who are over joyed to be wearing our luxury beachwear for girls!

Madeline McGraw

What we love most about our community is that we aren't only getting the children to love us for our comofortable luxury beachwear for girls, but that we get parents approval as well! They of course love the elegance that their children are in, but they also love the high quality swimwear from the finest materials in Europe. They definitely appreciate the UV 50+ sun protection that our  luxury beachwear for girls!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

Recently at school my friend and I were playing volleyball and the all hit my face!

What's your life motto/ slogan?

You can sit with me & you are beautiful

What you're favorite part about the brand?

Love the different patterns, styles & fittings of each piece exquisite piece.

We love to see families enjoying our luxury beachwear for girls because if you're at the pool or the beach it is always a good time when you have your perfect Stella Cove outfit on!

Daphnie Pearl:

We love to make sure our luxury beachwear for girls can withstand the many beach adventures your family will have a summer! That is why we use high quality materials to keep the fun going in our luxury beachwear for girls!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

Daphnie laughs all the time! This morning before school she was playing with her kitty who was jumping and swatting at her backpack as Daphnie was running around the house giggling!

What’s your life’s slogan/motto?

From Cinderella; Have courage and be kind!

What’s your favorite part about the brand?

Daphnie loves to swim and it's fun to have so many different colors and styles of swimwear to choose from!

We love to see little champions dominate the day at the beach and make sure they live with salty memories and the sound of the waves in their dreams! Hoping only to wake to another magnificent beach day wearing the perfect luxury beachwear for girls brand, Stella Cove! Our community hides no emotions when it comes to them enjoying there daycations!

Emily and Mary McGettigan:

When it come to our luxury beachwear for girls our community love that its unique styles and color combinations allow them to boost their own beauty! We love that we play such a role in the girls fashion industry to become one of the next greatest innovators. Our luxury beachwear for girls is sure to be on your next wish list!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

lol moment for Emily... goofing around at the pumpkin patch with her BFF Ashlee! Fun pushing each other around in the wheelbarrow!

Mine was when the kids taught me how to use the bee filter in snap chat!

What’s your life motto/slogan?

Emily's motto.. throw kindness around like confetti.   (U can never be too kind).

Mine---just do it!

What do you like most about the brand?

Emily loves that it is cute and unique

I love the quality and the fit!!!

Our luxury beachwear for girls is nothing, but the highest quality to meet the highest standards!

The 3 of Us:

We are so well known for our luxury beachwear for girls, yet we do have amazing designs and styles for boys as well! We want to make sure they are just comfortable in their beachwear, just like their sisters. Better yet, we make it easy for parents to have the sibling matching! Our luxury beachwear for girls is greatly complimented by the boys beachwear, which makes it a perfect picture every time!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

My son makes me laugh out loud on a daily basis!

What’s your life’s motto/slogan?

A good life is when you smile often, dream big, laugh alot and realize how blessed you are for what you have.

What’s your favorite part about the brand?

I love the whimsical design, the colors and the mood of the brand. I adore SC for being a classy and sophisticated children brand and can’t praise you enough for your superb product.

All the summer explorers are prepared for all the beaches around the world, whether it's our boys or luxury beachwear for girls!

Michelle Nicole Photography:

Our luxury beachwear for girls is sure to had some sweet times to the salty waves of the beach! We love to see everyone from the parents, to the kids, to even the professionals have a splendid time!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

The day we got our brand new goldendoodle puppy and he was chasing my kids around, but when tried to stop his paws were so bigger than his body and he slid right into the sliding glass door :).

What’s your life’s motto/slogan?

To always do what makes me happy, and never conform and change to please others.

What’s your favorite part about the brand?

My favorite part about Stella Cove brand is the fun and unique prints. It reminds me of a carefree childhood, filled with laughter and popsicles on the beach 🌴🌴

Our community loves to have loads of fun with our luxury beachwear for girls on! There's nothing, but smiles and sunshine with Stella Cove on!

Elanor:

We love that our community stretches across the globe! It's an awesome feeling they provide us knowing that our luxury beachwear for girls are in beaches across Europe, Australia, North and South America and of course Asia! Our luxury beachwear for girls has no boundaries, exactly like our beautiful Instagram family!

When was your last laugh out loud moment?

It was the day at my school photo, but my friend didn’t realize and her hair was crazy!

What’s your life’s motto/slogan?

Live life in the sunny lane.

What’s your favorite part about the brand?

I feel that the designs are so carefully chosen, not just plopped together in a printer.

Here at Stella Cove want everyone to know that they are welcome into our community to spread positivity, joy and happiness through are unique expression of our luxury beachwear for girls! We love to inspire boys and girls to become great every day and let them know that we are always interacting with our Instagram family!