#his brother is actually THE WORST!!!!! I HATE HIM!!!!
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Unpopular opinion: Nico's trauma is over rated
Okay so I'm not saying that it's not validated or anything, there's a reason it's over rated, but so many fans act like he's the only one and that no one else's trauma matters because Nico has it the worst. When did we start comparing literal trauma?? I think somebody we should look into more is honestly.. Percy. He's the main character and all, but it's almost like all the fans forgot how much he's gone through, which is CRAZY to me. Anyways I have a list cause I love making list and yeah.
1. Getting abused by his step dad, which made him feel worthless and like he didn't matter.
2. Everyone bullying him.
3. The only person who ever seemed to care about him, his mom, disappeared.
4. Getting punished bc of his father.
5. Getting accused of stealing something and getting sent on a quest at TWELVE.
6. His first friend at camp betrayed him, which gave him trust issues.
7. His best friend getting kidnapped.
8. Getting turned into a guinea pig, which actually gave him a phobia over.
9. Having suicidal thoughts while only being THIRTEEN.
10. Never thinking he is enough.
11. His other best friend being kidnapped.
12. Watching Bianica sacrifice herself after he tried to stop her.
13. Holding up the literal sky while also being injured.
14. Being blamed for Bianica's death (and believing it.)
15. Finding out Nico is a child of Hades and deciding to protect him against the Prophecy even if he hated him.
16. Annabeth mad at him bc Rachel likes him, even though he can't control that.
17. Getting lost and separated in the Labyrinth.
18. Watching Pan fade out of existence.
19. Watching Bekendorf explode on a boat.
20. Being the Demigod of the Prophecy.
21. Fighting a war on his birthday, the battle of Manhattan.
22. Watching so many people die in front of his eyes, knowing he couldn't save them.
23. Silena betraying him and the camp (I don't think she was a bad guy at the end but yea.)
24. Feeling guilty that Luke committed suicide and blaming himself when it isn't his fault (idk how true this one is but I've seen it so..)
25. Being kidnapped and all his memory taken away.
26. (This one is kinda a joke) Watching Octavian kill his pillow pet.. rip perry the panda pillow pet.
27. Being in another Prophecy of the seven.
28. Being afraid of drowning, while also being a child of Poseidian.
29. Falling into Tarturus with Annabeth.
30. Going completely psycho and mad.
31. Leaving Bob it Tarturus and feeling super guilty about it.
32. Making Gaia rise with a nosebleed.
33. Fighting in the battle of camp half blood.
34. Thinking Leo died.
35. Finally thinking he has a break and getting asked to help Apollo.
36. Becoming an older brother. (it's not like physical trauma but I'll explain it later)*
37. Jason's death.
38. Going on more quest to get college recommendation letters.
*okay so becoming an older brother was on this list because even if he was so happy to get a half sibling, he's been an only child for a long time and it's hard to accept new people in your life. Also older brother duties. Even if he was just leaving the house when she was a couple months old, I still put it on there bc many people can count it as one. Also I'm the oldest out of 6 kids growing up so I would count it lol*
And people still have the audacity to say percy was too much of a jerk in heroes of olympus, please. I would act the same way.
Anyways I actually have a list of a lot of different characters traumas cause I got bored one night so if you want to see the other list, tell me!!
#anyways i think we should talk about Percy's trauma more#percy jackson#pjo fandom#percy series#percy jackon and the olympians#heroes of olympus#nico di angelo#teenagers with trauma#rick riordan
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It's tinfoil hat times I have more observations for eagle eyes listeners (yes a Nightvale ref)
This will contain spoilers for recent TSAMS and LAES!
I gotta go to bed so I won't be able to contain everything but just some stuff I noticed recently and something I've been thinking about.
I won't be as organized as usual, warning spoilers below!
Picking apart what Dark Sun said and did...he used the word expunge. I don't know if this is problem of VA's picking a word that sounds cool...or they picked it know what it means? Expunge is a word that means 'to remove', 'delete', 'strike from the record'. So...why would he collect data on Sun's choice to kill Nexus and expunge that across the multiverse? Why would deleting that make Suns turn on Moons? I'm too tired to think about it past this but...it's interesting. What if D!Sun did delete something?
The biggest thing between Sun and choosing to kill...its his love and trust...but I wonder how Sun's decision to choose the greater good and his family would delete something? That sparkle nighttime Sun was beating his Moon while crying that he hated him...but did he actually? How can we know? I can't wait to find out more about the entire Sun on Moon violence. D!Sun said it was his hate for Nexus but that's not the case...because Sun himself stated he still can't get himself to hate Nexus. We also know, the only reason Sun's magic worked was because of what Ruin did...so I think my theory about the NSP and SP interacting to possibly make Nexus into a new being still stands. D!Sun knew Ruin planted that device when he made Sun choose.
I feel like history just keeps repeating itself where Sun's choices will never be choices and his decision will always be made for him. Moving into more stuff! The recent episodes omigod!!! Moon! He finally stepped up! I still have many things to point out though. I was talking in @goodolddumbbanana dms because like...we're both still disappointed by the episodes...(I won't type the entire dms cause like I want banana to do their piece too without me speaking over them)
When Moon talked to Sun at the pier, he still managed to make it about himself. Did anyone else notice that? He turned it into his normal "I hate myself" routine. He proceeded to let Sun know he's the best brother ever...but Sun just...I don't think he believes it. Even if Lunar and Earth also both tell him that. Even Solar. He just won't believe it.
Looking at how Sun's entire...existence has gone, it's pretty understandable why he'd think and feel this way.
He hasn't been shown by his family (except Earth) he's the best so why would he believe it? Especially coming from Moon who's done nothing but lie to him and break promises. Moon stepped up but...was acting annoyed to take care of Sun. He just was acting like he was ready to get stuff over with. Then...When Sun finally asked the million dollar question. "Did you hate me? Do you hate me?" He's always been asking that and never got a straight answer. Moon has always acted like he really did hate him in the past. Worst of all? Moon told Sun he did.
He told his emotionally beaten brother who's soul is shattered, that 'Yes Sun, I did hate you'...Moon...being honest in this particular situation...I don't think it's the best idea.
Moon, to an emotionally unstable - highly fragile - Sun, basically confirmed Sun's darkest fear. The soul deep ache Sun feels. It's not...gratifying...Sun may now have closure that 'wow he treated me like that because he did hate me' but the big issues with this? Moon has not really changed how he treats Sun. He stopped physically hurting him but he still hurts him. In small ways. We saw that first hand in the last few eps. He left to avoid Sun entirely. He broke promise after promise. He'd rather throw himself a pity party then buck up and just be there for Sun.
Sun always leads with the best intentions. He tells Moon he loves him. He encourages him. He builds him up. (I think i've said this before lol)
Then we get the MVP Earth ep. That episode was honest to God beautiful. Earth is an amazing sister and Kat knocked it out of the ball park with her vocal performance today. She put in so much emotion. I like how Earth's breaking point wasn't her taking care of Dazzle or Sun. Her breaking point was how her family was treating her and Sun like shit. They both left them to their own devices. It was so sad. I was wondering when they kept showing Solar who was taking care of Sun and honestly it makes so much sense it was Earth.
Then in the same episode she said Lunar is acting strange. I'm going to be honest, I know exactly why Lunar is acting mad at Earth.
I don't get a ton of opportunity to talk about Lunar. In the recent episodes his sorest spot was prodded by Taurus. Taurus is basically telling him to get over himself.
Which...I don't agree with how Gemini and Taurus are going about it. Letting go of your hate and hurt is so important but them just telling Lunar to do it isn't going to work. He needs to be taught how to.
So why is Lunar mad at Earth? Never forget, Lunar hasn't developed much he's still a very selfish immature person. He's mad at Earth he's stagnating. He's blaming her for his stunted emotional growth. He chose to numb himself to deal with his emotions and if he admits that was wrong then it'd be a long time of wasted efforts. He would have so many regrets if he admits he's been doing everything wrong.
After all, If Lunar wasn't so apathetic about N!Moon would he have made a difference in him becoming Nexus? (No, but Lunar could be thinking about that)
Lunar, I believe, is blaming Earth for not 'fixing' him. He doesn't understand he needs to want to change himself for it to happen. (it's the same thing for Moon, he knows he's flawed but has given up on improving) I think Lunar just kind of assumed Earth was supposed to automatically make him better with him not doing any work himself.
Then the crux of why he's mad at Earth.
It's simple.
She's friends with Eclipse.
That's really what it is.
Think about it, he hates Eclipse. Eclipse is now in the front of his mind to the point he's acting odd and watching Nutella ads for hours. He's trying to mute his rage. What Taurus and Gemini said would anger anyone.
Telling a victim to not only get over their abuse but also get along with their abuser? It's plain wrong. Lunar has the right to hate Eclipse, the only problem is that it is harming him. Hatred will always be someone's undoing. It is a negative, putrid thing that only destroys.
He's been shoving his emotions down for so long they're bound to explode. I know Lunar loves Sun and wants to be there for him but he's been apathetic for so long now he can't. So he's lashing out and projecting his own self anger onto Earth. She's right there after all.
Solar is basically acting like a keeper to everyone and despite doing better for Sun, Solar is still emotionally distant. Moon physically isn't there. Lunar won't lash out at Monty. He won't take his frustration out on kids like Dazzle and Jack.
Earth is also just...too nice. So yeah, I absolutely understand why Lunar is angry at Earth. He's being totally unfair and immature about it too, because it's not like there's other problems, ie Sun is literally broken and can't leave bed.
but I digress, I like that Moon is stepping up. I just hope he doesn't keep dropping the ball. I think Sun right now truly doesn't think Moon cares...Moon is going to have to do a lot to show him otherwise. I'm glad Lunar finally checked on Sun and I hope he does it more often, because Sun loves Lunar too. He loves the entire family. Earth was right to cry about how they were failing Sun.
I'm really proud of Earth and Solar for stepping up to help Sun.
#brainrot#sabronda brainrot#it's my bedtime#i couldn't sleep without posting this#earth mvp this ep#tsams#laes#the sun and moon show#the lunar and earth show#laes earth#laes lunar#tsams earth#tsams lunar#tsams sun#tsams moon#tsams solar#tsams spoilers#laes spoilers#sabronda yapping#tsams dark sun
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i swear on all that i am that i'm not into him.
... even if i have been thinking about kissing him all day
#I HATE HIM I HATE HIM#guys he's seriously the worst#and uh... you know how r.eboot d.ante is my best friend....#you know how he has a twin brother....#SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP I SAID NOTHING#his brother is actually THE WORST!!!!! I HATE HIM!!!!#also. just gotta say. i love og d.mc so much! i love silver haired d.ante and v.ergil#but i selfship with the reboot twins#any feelings i have for the reboot brothers is totally separate than the original brothers#so#HYPOTHETICALLY!!!! if i start saying stupid shit like 'i think reboot v.ergil is hot'#it has nothing to do with Original V.ergil#aka the storm that is approaching#thats all#... and i'm not into v.ergil shut uo shut up shut up shut upppppp ive written too much bullshit about my s/i threatening to kill him and#yelling at him to be into him. guys this isnt happening. it's not. i'm not in denial either because i cant deny feelings that dont exist!!#ash rambles 💚#... idiot. fucking idiot.
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hate to remind y’all of this but louis really is just A Man™️
as are any other male celebrities you like. just mf dudes.
#celebrity worship dying between me and the mutuals and i’m loving it#‘fuck love island worst show i’ve ever seen end love island’ *hangs out with love island aus castmates*#*flips off israel flag but still eats his maccas like it’s not been on the boycott list for months*#doubtful he’s checked out the boycott lists or anything like you wanna pretend you’re actually an anarchist for once? do more white man!!#would i still [redacted] absolutely BUT he IS just a man#ideologies that should coexist: celebrities are just people + celebrities have reach and power every day people do not#and if you have a position of power/reach it doesn’t mean you’re excempt from x responsibilities and the like!#watch people accuse me of hating him again because i don’t kiss his ass 24/7. oh brother#alex talks
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For someone who’s writing a fic centered around Sesshomaru x OC I sure do like to put Inuyasha under a microscope to prod at his brain to figure out what’s going on in there.
(Anyways, here’s my favorite paragraph from Inuyasha’s POV from the most recent chapter.)
"He knew what it was like to lose a loved one. He knew what it was like to lose someone he thought he could trust. He knew what it was like to love and not trust, and to have that love and distrust thrown back in his face. He knew what it was like to love and lose, because he had done it several times before, and each time was more painful than the last. His entire childhood was spent running and hiding in fear, trying desperately to stay alive, because all he had known had left him and the world was intent on getting rid of him too."
(Also an excerpt from Sango’s POV because I love her and there’s something very important near the end of it.)
Lifting her gaze, Sango turned to stare at Inuyasha again- the boy chancing a glance at her out of the corner of his eye, over his shoulders. To the demon slayer, who had been informed how badly Sesshōmaru had treated him in the past, and had seen them fight at least once, Inuyasha looked like a frightened dog.
He was afraid.
Not for Irene, who- deep down- he knew was alive, but of the idea that Sesshōmaru had somehow changed. The person he despised more than anything, perhaps even more than Naraku himself.
Sango remembered all too clearly the way Inuyasha had lashed out at Irene before when she said she didn’t hate Sesshōmaru. When she said she had actually felt safe with him. The idea that Sesshōmaru could have had a change of heart, and was no longer the ruthless demon Inuyasha grew up with- grew up avoiding, grew up trying to survive against- was… terrifying to him. It was like the world he thought he understood was coming crashing down around him.
Because if Sesshōmaru’s heart actually changed for the better, if he was actually going out of his way to save Irene- Inuyasha’s friend- then that meant Inuyasha would have to feel gratitude towards him. One of his best friends would be alive because of the half-brother that had so-often wanted him dead.
But… that doesn’t erase the past.
Sango wonders if Inuyasha realizes that. If he knows that, just because Sesshōmaru has the capacity to care now and even cares about one of their friends, it doesn’t mean the scars of the past will vanish. Inuyasha is still allowed to hate him. He’s allowed to hold a grudge.
Sesshōmaru had been awful to him.
Just because there will be gratitude to the demon lord for saving Irene, that doesn’t mean Inuyasha has to forgive him.
“Inuyasha…” The bloodied mask felt heavy in Sango’s hand, but she didn’t set it down. Her features shifted into something gentler, yet still so very sad. “It’s okay.”
The half-demon said nothing.
“It’s okay to hate Sesshōmaru.”
His feelings are completely valid on this matter. Forgiveness is a gift, not an obligation, and Inuyasha does not have to give it if he does not choose so.
#he’s such a complex character. like he doesn’t seem to at first glance but if you actually DELVE into it?#boy’s a tsundere but like onky because he’s been THROUGH some shit#he was bullied by humans and hunted down by demons. his mother and only supporter died when he was a child#his own brother spent most of Inuyasha’s life trying to kill him#when he finally learned to love again he couldn’t TRUST and then had that love and distrust thrown back at him in the worst way possible#and ended up bound to a tree for fifty years before a girl identical to the one who pinned him there woke him up#and then he learned to love AND trust. but then becomes so very afraid of losing everything all over again#so he tries to keep his new friends at a distance but fails because they’re stubborn and affectionate and LOVE him for who he is#and now the brother who hates him and tried several times to kill him is raising a HUMAN??? He ADOPTED a human????#in this essay I will-#Inuyasha#Sesshomaru#kagome higurashi#his tsundere-ness is like a defense mechanism and it HURTS ME but like in a good way#sango#lord sesshoumaru#Sesshomaru x oc
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Looks like I just lost another close friend to guy who isn't worth a pile of dog shit. 😊
#my best friend no less#i cried about this shit practically all afternoon but i'm all out of tears and now i'm just pissed off.#this shit has been going on for a long ass time but i've finally reached my breaking point with it#i love her#but she is delusional#and it kills me to say that#but that whole “relationship” (if you even want to call it that) is fake. all he cares about is money not her#the worst part is that she knows it too#oh but she “loves him” and “wants to give him one last chance” girl what the fuck?#oh but better yet he dumped her once 2 years ago already and i've hated his punk ass since#never should've gotten back tother after that and i told her as much even back then#all he does is make her cry#not do anything arount their town house#and sit on his ass and watch tv or sleep when he's not working#that's the tame stuff too i could say sooo much worse but i'm actually not trying to air her dirty laundry out her#i'm just pissed off#but suddenly IM the bad guy when tell her i won't support her or this “relationship” when she told me they were getting back together today#this is after i helped her and her parents ans brother move all her stuff out of the town house last Monday and back to her parents place#after she told me they were done for good#but IM the bad guy for bringing up all of fhe reasons listed above and all of the REALLY bad things about the relationship#when i tell her i won't be supporting her any longer and that i'll be walking away if she goes back to him#best part is her family agrees with me and they tell her all the things i say about him and then some#but when i go out on the line and put my heart down on the table for her and all i get back is a text saying:#“i don't really like how you're texting right now so we'll talk about this later.”#girl#i don't know whether or not i want to cry harder or strangle her#i think it's both#so yeah i think i just lost my best friend to a guy who doesn't remotly deserve her and everything kicks rocks rn#it's just like my other friend all over again#why do my friend have such dog shit taste in men
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@limey-self-inserts LMAO RIGHT 😂😂 at least in the first season of the bad batch + like half of the second one, he remained like STUBBORNLY his worst self for a long while.
When I was talking about it with my partner, I was thinking about just how much of an ASSHOLE he was to Rex. And what he SAID to Rex about Echo during that arc in season 7 "I would have left him for dead too, after all he's just another reg" like BRO WHAT? That's why I hated him so much at first = _ = and that's also why I figured it's not out of the realm of possibility for him to say something like that to Brea! Maybe he didn't really mean what he said about Kep but he DEFINITELY just wanted to hurt Rex.
Like...I imagine he and Brea haven't been in contact for a while but he's been thinking about her this whole time you know? Maybe he's even thought about trying to reach out to her but his dumb pride doesn't let him, and then when they see each other again it's too late. Not sure how he finds out but she's clearly in love with Rex now, a REG, something Crosshair inherently dislikes but he now HATES. Not to mention when order 66 happens, Crosshair can feel that pull, less so than an unaltered clone but he still feels it and it's probably FUELED by his feelings of betrayal BY Brea. The jedi are traitors according to his coding, but she specifically betrayed HIM in his mind. And for THAT they must pay.
#jane journals#self insert talk#🎯 baby shot me down 🎯#NOW U CAN SEE THE HIDDEN MEANINGS BEHIND THIS SHIP TAG#UGH I HATE HIM SO MUCH 😡💖😡💖😡💖😡💖😡💖😡#its sooooo fun to think about this juicy angst tho!!#like i dont think shed go on the mission to retrieve echo WITH rex and them. i think she gets called elsewhere#but she was there to comfort rex and tell him he's doing the right thing#similarly to how padme did for anakin!#and maybe theyre hidden but not well hidden ENOUGH and crosshair sees them share a kiss or a loving touch#maybe through his periscope! or whatever its called on his rifle#and his heart SHATTERS#in his mind he keeps getting betrayed again and again tbh by brea THEN by his brothers by defecting from the empire#again hes just his WORST self the whole time#hes obsessive too i imagine that during a period of time where the boys are hanging out with brea post-order 66 they encounter each other#maybe crosshair even CAPTURES her#he probably tries to convince her she still has a chance and to turn herself into the empire. he can save her. get her a pardon#and he TOTALLY believes that cause hes still too stubborn to see that the empire doesnt ACTUALLY care about him#ofc she refuses and somehow escapes later shes reunited with rex yadda yadda#but the truth is deep down he STILL loves her despite the betrayal and despite her refusal#the way he still loves and misses his brothers despite them being TRAITORS as well#IM A YAPPER NOW SHJFJGG#i kept all this inside for a long while so thats why im letting it all out#you're welcome!
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Wow, I just finished Black Adam and I’m pleasantly surprised by how much I liked it? At times it did try a little too hard to be cool, to the point where it almost felt like their target audience were 12 year old boys, but none the less, it was really enjoyable and probably my favorite or 2nd favorite DCEU movie ever.
(Spoilers below):
I still stand by all the criticism I had about the lack of Arab/MENA actors in this movie, especially considering that Khandaq in this movie was basically a mix between Egypt and Iraq with a little dash of Palestine, but again, surprisingly there wasn’t anything too offensive? The worst thing was them creating a fake swirly script instead of using actual Arabic script and over-using the yellow-filter™ without showing and any greenery (I loved the fake ancient Khandaq Doctor Fate created in their fight with Black Adam, I wished the country actually looked like that through-out the film)
My only REAL problem was how they half-assed the Middle Eastern commentary about Khandaq being occupied by invaders and how its supposed to mirror the real-life state of the Middle East, if you’re gonna do it then go all the way, because Adrianna made some solid points against the JSA and how they failed to protect Khandaq, but that plot-line was immediately dropped and nothing came out of it, seriously, like a “you’re right, we failed you and we apologize” would have been nice at least. Never the less, it was still nice to finally see one movie where an Arabic-coded country gets saved by their own people, the scene that had the citizens of Khandaq going to streets to fight those zombies was my favorite scene of the entire movie (I just wished Black Adam, just like main villain of the movie, was actually played by a MENA actor)
Speaking of the JSA, I’m afraid they were the weakest part of the movie (especially Cyclone and Atom), nothing against them, but I felt like this movie should have either been an JSA movie or a Black Adam movie, not both at the same time.
I personally wouldn’t have minded Adrianna and Amon taking their place in helping Black Adam fight against Sabbac? We could have had a found-family type of story with Black Adam choosing to share his powers with his new family as a way to heal from his trauma. I mean lets not pretend that all of the Tomaz family weren’t the best part of the movie? Now imagine if they got super-powers and were Isis and Osiris? It would have been the icing on the cake.
#I'm really confused about how overly-hated Amon was when this movie first come out#as if he wasn't a highlight#the worst thing I could say about him was that he acted a little too young for his age#but that's it#I loved his relationship with Black Adam#especially considering they didn't have much going on in the comics#but I really hope this movie will inspire DC to bring him and his sister back to canon#and actually let them stay as brother and sister not mother and son!!!#Black Adam#Amon Tomaz#Adrianna Tomaz#movie review
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Every now and then I replay the first episode of VLD and I wonder why I thought it be a good show lol
#mostly just the part where Allura is assigning pilots to lions#why lol. the first five people who show up are just perfect fits?? hate it lol#i have no au plot ideas but itd have made more sense to draw out the forming of voltron. like for a longer time. like its the s1 finale#and to be traveling looking for appropriate pilots#or the s2 finale? like what if the original gang somehow stayed in contact despite not being Voltron paladins and they proved being the best#team despite not piloting immediately. i feel like a stronger plot of their forming teamwork outside of being Voltron would have also made#their friendships seem more real too lmao#like what if Lance IS Blue's pilot bit hes the only one for a long time. the other lions couldn't actually *just be* located#*but. not bit. and what if Pidge runs off in a stolen vessel to find her dad and brother. what if Shiro isnt.. so flat as a character and is#desperate to find his old team and runs off with them to help out and free others#Keith could somehow get involved with The Blades a lot sooner#and Hunk finds his footing as a leader in rebellion organization. i hate that he was just the funny guy allll the way thru#also (still not a plot bc my brain is unorganized lol) Allura doesnt die. Shiro actually gets to be gay with a husband. and we either need#to not make Lotor a villain or just go all out on making him the worst. i personally dont want him to be a villain bc it was stupid lol#also PULEEEAASE Lance is bi. Lance “I'm just getting a feel for the stick” *obsessed with his rival who doesnt even know he exists* McClain#i want to see him get over his crush on Allura within like 6 episodes and then see him making out with the mermaids then Keith when everyone#starts reuniting lol. my bicon Lance deserves to kiss mermaids like we all do and then get on when the otp lol#now im nostalgic for s1 VLD vibes. ya know. before hell lol#it really just gets worse after ... s3? everyone feels different. i usually tolerate up to about the end of s3 before i feel like its donezo#aunt posting#vld#voltron: legendary defender
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i should really hang out with more indo wrestling fans (they actually got other nia jax stans here)
#yeah i like her. sue me lol#i like her moves and she hasnt injured anyone in months and its not like anyone working with her is making interviews or vagueposts about it#unlike certain guys including my own faves. she's literally not in the worst scale of worst ppl and yet the hate she got is overblown#one of the classic GOATs in wrestling actually beats his wife and one of the newer fan favoriters who still got fanfic written about him#injured literally two brothers in the same year and made rape comments about a girl and he never get as horrible backlash that nia gets#and if anyone wants to come at her for being antivaxx there are male stars who are still loved despite being a flat earther#worst past is i see this double standards on bloggers who i expected to know better..... maybe theyre not so in touch with the rumor mills#but cmon. do you ever question why the girls bad marks tend to be more well know than the guys?#ugh. some of yalls support for women's art seems superficial ngl#compared to my indo wrasslin friends and when they like women#they just make fancams about how cool their girls are and how they should win and it seems 100 times more sincere than the yuri moment#posting i see on tumblr#fandom wank
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heartbreaking: this user enjoys characters who have a romantic relationship that breaks off permanently in favour of a different one, but really hates when fans of the second one get really weird and hostile about the first one, so they're never fully satisfied
#i really like she//nko. i also like sha//karian. hate how weird it seems to be between these two online </3#i enjoy that part of shep's development! people change!! i don't want it to be a dig why do u have to make it weird#me in th Shipping People Websites: can you let people break up in peace (I am assaulted by dozens of ooc two-sentence cu*k*ld fantasies)#youve already won brothers. one of these is wildly more popular than the others ifnotmisinterpretedregularly. y be weird on unrelated posts#tangentially related but even if i dont care much for vampire boy baldursgate i promise. you dont have to remind ppl loveposting about him#that you dont like him actually or interpret him in the worst possible way or think his fans are (pejorative of choice)#you are just weird and uncomfortable to be around and i implore you to learn to make friends in social environments. gobd bless#armour clanking#if this show up in any main tags its outside of my hands. i didnt put any in. its up to the lord if i will have annoying people in notifs#so do not contribute to it ! 👍 i dont come here to argue at 3am i come here to yell at my wall at 3. you can yell too if you want thats it
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i will sob my brains out at 5 am remembering events from this year and also christmas last year and being annoyingly petty and unable to let go of relatively small comments just bc i’m sensitive and raw and have a complex
#personal#fake therapy is fun till ur sobbing and biting ur lip and realize how hard ur gripping your arm#ben said i was an adult after i jokingly not jokingly mentioned mom made me go to work for 3 days with a broken foot#after she was complaining about how mean we are to her#which i imagine was just resentment of her calling me abusive the other day#and also i was out returning stuff for my mom at like 4 different stores and came back home like give me five to change so i don’t look#frumpy when we get dinner#and then moms like hurry up oh my god and bens like stop that’ll just make her take longer and fuck both of you i’ve been changing for what#5 fucking minutes? is it that deep ?#and mom saying i should have gone earlier but i didn’t bc i was sick and she’s like whatever and i can already feel the difference with my#brother home and it’s awful bc i do love him and enjoy his company#and maybe i’m on edge bc he only visits during holidays and holidays never go well for home#me#and we have fun and enjoy dinner but also that comment and like yeah maybe it was my fault for not just going anyway#but also mom was threatening to kick me out and making fun of me crying in pain#and fuck you you have a completely dynamic to her and she actually fucking likes you#and i just turn into this worst verison of my self around him bc i have a complex and i hate it#anyway. my tummy hurts. im no longer crying so this emotion will be purged pretty soon amen
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#vent#my brother really doesn't see me as a person does he#im allowed to be around as decoration for his personality#im allowed to be around if it serves him in some way#but I can't be a person I can't have opinions I can't have needs#I can't have problems im supposed to be his pillow to scream into and punch when he feels like it#I can't be unwell because I'm not a person#I'm a doll he can show around when he feels one way and toss against the wall when he feels another way#I think he actually hates me#he's so mean to me on a level that makes it hit much harder than other things#always assuming the worst about me#because im bad annoying a waste of space im loud and useless#unless I serve him#I listen to him vent I play therapist because I love him#I love my family and I want all of them to be okay and to be happy#and I've minimized myself to the point I don't know who I am anymore and neither do they#though im not so sure they even care#my mother is actively working on herself#she's in therapy#she's nicer to me now and a touch more considerate#and I appreciate it... but I'll never be able to forget what she and the others have done to me over the years#and it'll take much more than 8 weeks in a clinic to overwrite that survival strategy I developed as a child...#I feel like I'll never be whole again#like Ive lost myself forever...#my brother is ableist. he hates the neurodivergent which is mostly directed at my sister but also me unknowingly#he attacks me for my symptoms. judges me harshly and is just very mean in general#if I end up getting the autism diagnosis i am so scared of him finding out#it's strange because I love him he's my brother and we have fun but im also scared of him because I know what he's capable of and I know#what he's like when he's angry. I know how he used to laugh at me getting hurt as a child and how he would physically attack me for#expressing excitement around him. I repeat things I find funny or nice or just good in general like if someone says something funny I repeat
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AJDJAJDJWHE HIIIIIII!!! HI I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU!!!!!
#i booted up the shiny s.kyrim ps5 update today#first thing i did? ran to my beloved#goodness he looks so good in those shiny graphics#i love him sooo much! i know he's a member of the thieves guild but uh#he stole my heart#ash rambles 💚#also i've been getting sooo many crushes as of late#theres this one really pretty girl#and uh. theres a character i said i wouldnt ever fucking like. he's kinda...#my beef with him began when i saw that he wears red glasses ajshajdh so do i! and so I've dedicated myself to proving that i'm obviously the#cooler one with red glasses! but... he's kind of... handsome.#JUST A LITTLE BIT#i haven't played his game yet#and#theres a character thats been haunting me for months#i hate him but i love him but he's the worst but i care but i dont but i want to see him dead but i want the best for him but he's#disgusting but he's so hot and goodness that man confuses me. his twin brother is also my best friend f/o and i'm not trying to#pull the 'heyyy bro i banged your brother!' card#he's actually so horrible. but he's actually so handsome#wait this post was about r.une#okay so i really love r.une#he's super kind and sweet and i love how he's so polite to the player! he was ash's first friend in the guild. he talked to her when no one#else did. she was pretty intimidated of everything and everyone at first and preferred to hide in the corner but he approached her with#such a polite and charming smile.. (swoons)#anyways i am eepy! point is.#1) i love mr. r.une s.kyrim so much.#2) i have a crush on yet another stunning lady that is so out of my league#she likes makeup and fashion and i keep thinking about lipstick marks on my face 😳#3) i think i'm developing another crush and it's giving big enemies to lovers vibes.#4)that one character is confusing me as always. feelings are complicated. i hate him. but i love him. but i hate him. ok i hit tag limit gn!
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random oc facts, of the "they have problems" flavor
#oc talk#1- luca developed claustrophobia from the time he was locked in the school's bathroom by her bullies#2- chase got his depression from his mom; who also has it; except she goes to therapy and has meds so its now somewhat controlled#he was quite the spoiled kid by both his parents but his mom was the one who would always agree with him and give him everything#even if he was in the wrong and the worst piece of shit he could be. she felt guilty about him getting clinical depression for 'her fault'#so she wanted to 'compensate him' for 'ruining his life'. he was still pretty harsh with both of them so.#one day he told her to kill herself and go to hell over a minor thing; that same night he went to see finnley#so he never knew his mom actually tried to kill herself if thats what he wanted. his dad was kinda bitter for a few days#but eventually forgave him. and as i said none of them told him anything so he never knew.#3- maverick still gets nervous when he sees cops or hears police sirens - hes always on the edge#whether theyre going to actually arrest him some day. he doesnt know if zachary's body was ever found as he avoided tv for that reason#like he hid it in an abandoned house. it was a horrible hiding place but it was the closest he had and he was panicking with a dead body#so its not like he could do the smartest things in that state. also of course he left his dna everywhere- finding him would be really easy#but it never happened since zachary came back before anyone noticed his disappearance. and with a new appearance#its was like the old zachary people knew just stopped existing entirely. you cant do a murder case without a body#so it was just labeled as a sudden disappearance. however mav is paranoid over it when in his non-empty state#and when hes empty hes so focused in finding someone new to obsess over he stops caring- maybe he could even find someone on prison!#4- rafael doesnt talks to his family due to charlotte manipulating him into believing theyre all horrible people who hate her#and in fact they hate her! mostly his sister. they hate what she did to their son/brother but hes so blind and easy to manipulate#they stopped trying to knock some common sense into him. his sister was afraid this would happen eventually bc he was always gullible#SPECIALLY when hes in love. and well guess what happened!!#5- on the topic of charlotte; she has both tried to kill herself AND kill someone. well; her 'suicide attempt' was more likely#wanted to get hospitalized but not *actually* ending her life. in her mind that would make her parents notice how much they hurt her#with their 'favoritism' towards raven. girl they literally never had a favoritism YOU are the one who think so!!!#she never got what she wanted though-- she ended up vomiting the pills and suddenly got too embarrassed to talk about it#and guess who she wanted to kill? exactly; raven! they would sometimes see each other on family reunions and it was weird#she bought anti-freezer and brought it to a reunion-- she has been on a barista course so technically no one would think anything#if she made drinks for everyone. but raven was just so insistent on seeing the process-- due to actual curiosity-- that she couldnt do it#so she came home with an anti-freezer and incredible frustrated lmao. she was 17 though so its not like it was thoroughly planned#but you know. the intention was there.
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i am having a genuine core memory type of bad day today like serious SERIOUS things are going down and i missed a flight because genuine life changing events are happening and got put on standby for another which got delayed multiple times til i would’ve missed my connecting flight home and anyways it was overbooked so i didn’t make it on, and then now five hours after they left me at the airport im finally heading home and i was like “well at least i can eat the fries i bought that i didn’t get to eat yesterday” but my useless cousin who has not only been completely useless through this weeks long ordeal but has also been making things worse stepped in and ate the whole giant box of fries cause he “thought we were leaving” even though my mom clearly left half her stuff behind at the house and told him we did not make our flight so she was going to stay in town and try and get me home and also this whole situation (except for the fries) is straight up my fault cause i didn’t wanna get out of bed for 20 minutes when we woke up and like normally this would be fine especially since i went to bed at 2 am packing suitcases and then had to wake up at 7 and also slept super poorly anyways but i still have no self discipline and everything has gone wrong because of that
#i should be freshly showered and in bed right now having a good cry#i’m genuinely seething at my cousin btw we keep asking him to do the most basic things and he makes some excuse#and then it turns out to be a lie#like my cousin is stronger/bigger than i am so my mom wanted his help w the suitcases#and we went out for one last dinner last night but he kept telling my mom he wanted to go home and sleep bc his job starts early#and getting irritated at her when she tried to take two minutes to finish eating#anyways we went home early and he did not go to bed. we could hear him gaming and yelling at the computer til we went to bed at 2 am#and his job starts at 3 am so he can’t have actually been worried about sleeping#oh he also just didn’t go to work and this is like a repeated occurrence#and he didn’t bother seeing us off to the airport or wake up til like 11#when i called him saying we needed him to bring my passport and it was an emergency#idk this all seems like super trivial but my mom is straight up handling a tragedy alone#i won’t deny that i haven’t really been useful but i’ve been coming along everywhere on top of remote working from here#meanwhile he’s kinda just been at home gaming and not leaving his room#i can kind of excuse his brother who’s also been at home but he’s also like super obviously been prepping for a super rough final and idk#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. can you at least have some decency and like#try not to pile more work on my mother who is dealing with one of the worst things that can happen to her#and try to use your parents not being around as an excuse to run around town with your friends#while lying to my mom and saying you need to sleep or work or yeah you’ll be straight home (you’re going for lunch with your buds)#i mentioned something about how i’ve spent time with him instead of my friends when he’s visiting us and he was like ‘you have friends?’#i don’t know man i can’t cry in bed i can’t sleep cause they keep the house cold#basic functioning is making me miserable with the brain issues i don’t know what to do#cause if i go home im going to be in the exact same situation just#with a better bathroom and a guitar and feeling useless and sad because i can’t help#anyways i need to text my boss to let her know no shot i can make it tomorrow#which feels awful cause i was supposed to get back A WEEK AGO i had to extend i hate it here i hate it here i hate it here
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