#his brain is fried from too much drugs

[moss-ball69]

Biblically accurate Tf2 pyro pt 1

[semisolidmind]

been seeing some anthro designs of the current blorbos and i can’t stop thinking about an au for it. so, to get it outta my brain;

(i guess this is a college au?)

—dogday and catnap as adoptive brothers, with a big group of friends (the critters, who are mostly dogday’s friends that tolerate catnap), the cat is primarily mute and allows his brother to do the talking for the both of them.

—catnap was kidnapped when he and dogday were kids. he was 5, and he was missing for five years. to their credit, his family never gave up hope of finding him. when he was found, he was dazed, stumbling along the road, malnourished, and bleeding from shallow wounds on his arms and legs. his vocal chords had been fried through the forced inhalation of some strange drug, and he couldn't speak at all for a good long while after. catnap and his adopted family learned sign language (and though his voice healed somewhat as he got older, he still prefers not to use it). despite getting better, his voice maintains a raspy, whispery quality.

—catnap was obviously traumatized by his time away and refused to talk about it. it was deduced that he'd been taken by an infamous cult in the area and indoctrinated. a very close eye was kept on him throughout the rest of his grade school life. with no behavioral problems beyond a lack of speech and general closed-off attitude, most write off any weird behavior of his as a result of his trauma. he maintains a close relationship with his brother, he works nightshifts at a gas station, and stays out of trouble. supposedly.

—(catnap's a serial killer. he destroys anyone with a target placed on them by his god; a being the cult calls "the prototype." the cult conditioned him to be their executioner. catnap still smokes the opium-based drugs fed to him all those years ago, now sent to him discreetly by the cult; to help him "see what the prototype wants him to see," and "enact his will." his almost-full immunity allows him to use the smoke to knock out his victims by casually taking a drag and blowing it into their faces (he then either kills them right then or takes them to the cult to be sacrificed).

—dogday is a bright, happy fella who makes friends with almost anyone. he's a favorite on campus, a sweet guy who radiates sunshine and maintains a large group of friends. he has a massive crush on y/n, a newcomer to his school, and immediately integrates them into his circle (he calls them angel, something about them "saving" him from some accident? no one is really sure what happened there). he's terrible at hiding just how smitten he is, and his friends tease him when y/n isn't around. dogday swears he'll confess, but he gets so flustered and nervous about messing up their relationship. it doesn't help that his angel is so oblivious to his love (bobby does her best to try and nudge y/n towards dogday, but it never seems to click). y/n and dogday are very close despite all this tension.

—catnap likes y/n too, in his quiet way. he'll stand with them when the group is together, resting his chin on the top of their head or leaning on them while everyone stands around and talks. he sits next to them in the library while bubba tutors dogday in math, resting his head on the desk and watching y/n read out of his peripheral. he likes how quiet they are. they're so...so gentle with him, without being condescending or infantalizing him. he appreciates the care they show him. he wants all the attention they'll give him.

he also likes that they're a little scared of him.

some more ideas:

—both boys are close to y/n and spend a lot of time with them, without the rest of their friends.

—y/n becomes one of the only people catnap won't kill. he's gotten attached.

—happening in a universe where monsters and humans coexist. not a ton of division, but there's a monster side of town (where the buildings are much bigger to accommodate larger bodies) and a human side.

—you think catnap is the only dangerous one until you see how dogday reacts to y/n being harmed in some way. like catnap is the obviously dangerous one you don't take your eyes off of but then you catch dogday outta your peripheral about to clock you with a pipe

—dogday is an absolutely wonderful partner, so devoted and loyal, and willing to throw hands if given a reason to (a big surprise to anyone who thinks he's just the "nice" one). y/n isn't completely oblivious to his affection, but is hesitant to act on any feelings they have; while most monsters don't mind human/monster relationships, there are plenty of humans that disapprove. they don't want dogday to be harassed because of them.

—a scene where catnap forcefully shotguns red smoke into y/n’s mouth to knock them out cause he thinks it’d make them happier to not have to “worry so much" and take a nap w/ him (also he wants a lil kiss and can't be normal about it). or maybe he's tryna kidnap them or smth. y/n doesn't really remember much when catnap does this, and writes it off as catnap's drowsy nature rubbing off on them when they wake up after an unexpected snooze.

—catnap doesn't like being touched usually. his brother and y/n are the exceptions.

—it's very subtle, and noone would notice if they weren't watching them closely, but both catnap's and dogday's pupils get a bit bigger when looking at y/n. two overgrown, lovesick housepets.

[zorosdimples]

MORE, PLEASE, ALWAYS, FOREVER

pairing ༄ simeon x gn!reader

warnings ༄ minors: please do not interact! i will block you. suggestive content, religious/sacrilegious imagery, corruption, manipulation, dubious consent, drugging. simeon calls reader “little one” and “darling.” please let me know if i’m missing anything!

word count ༄ 771

notes ༄ this is my first time posting my writing, so please be kind! this drabble is darker than what i usually write; i’ve just been thinking about simeon and corruption for months… i have fluffier pieces in the works, i promise! <3

“but s-simeon,” you whispered, afraid to raise your voice lest desire drip from each syllable—as if the angel couldn’t see your trembling thighs or the glint of hunger in your gaze. your skin glowed, he observed, all dewy with want; he had never seen anything so beautiful, so vulnerable. your chest heaved as though you couldn’t catch your breath. “you’re an angel.”

“yes?” he hummed, trying not to sound too eager—all while his blood sang for you.

your tongue wetly floundered for a response, brain unable to comprehend anything other than the fierce fire that licked at your very core. oh, if he did not relish your sputtering, dumb state. you hung onto his every word as if he would lead you to salvation.

that’s what angels were created for, right?

“angels, humans, demons—we all have more in common than you think. we all have similar urges, similar needs,” simeon stated, lithe fingers traveling down your sides to dig into the soft flesh of your hips, forcing a breathy sigh from your lips. shame would have eaten you alive had it not been for your desperation.

“but you humans are rather self-centered, no?” he asked with an experimental squeeze that had your eyes fluttering dreamily. “you assume that your corrupted moral compass applies to the other two realms.”

you shivered as simeon leaned so close that you could smell the sweetness—caramel?—that clung to his skin. his lips brushed your ear as he whispered, “angels, as god’s chosen creatures, are encouraged to love deeply.” his fingertips grazed your belly as you swallowed thickly. his hot breath melted your resolve while his thinly-veiled words had your nerves thrumming in anticipation.

patience was a virtue that simeon usually embodied, but the thrill you inspired within him was cracking his restraint. he couldn’t help but push: push himself, push you. he needed to hear you to say it.

he gently cradled your chin between his thumb and forefinger, angling your face to meet his expectant gaze. if you had been in the right state of mind, perhaps you would have noticed how his azure irises were unusually dark, pools of midnight you could drown in.

the smile that tugged at his lips was almost wicked as he probed, “what do you need, little one? tell me.”

the endearment fell on deaf ears as you leaned into simeon’s grasp like a simpering pet. your eyes flickered down to his lips instead of answering his question, biting down on your own almost hard enough to draw blood.

“ah ah,” he chided, pinching your chin, still a hair’s breadth from your face.

you looked like a wounded animal for a moment, eyes wide and shimmering, staring down the barrel of a hunter’s gun. you tried to wriggle from his grasp in embarrassment.

the angel’s grip was unyielding, though. he was certain there would be bruises on your tender flesh come morning—the thought only heightened his arousal. his honeyed chuckle, like a potent sedative, lulled your movements.

“as much as i appreciate your enthusiasm,” simeon said with featherlight strokes to your burning cheek, “i need you to use your words, darling.”

you whimpered in response. your brain was fried, incapable of intelligent thought. all you could do was feel and act—instinct usurping rationale—more animal than human. all you could muster was a breathy and pathetic “please,” punctuated by the unshed tears that sparkled in your eyes.

“please what?” he cooed with faux sympathy. his free hand skimmed down the slope of your shoulder and the curve of your arm to ultimately settle on the fat of your thigh. the movement caused a tremor to ricochet through your body.

he looked at you like he wanted to devour you, to pick your bones clean, to consume you so wholly that not even your soul remained. and maybe it should have frightened you. but all you wanted was to lay yourself bare and let the angel feast on you until there was nothing left.

“i need you, simeon,” you finally breathed, soft as a prayer.

as soon as the words left your bruised lips, he lifted you onto his lap, wrapping your legs around his waist. you exhaled a warbled moan when he dipped down to scrape his teeth against the column of your throat. “that wasn’t so difficult, was it?” he murmured into your skin.

you were too far gone to answer—not that simeon cared. he finally had you where he wanted you, writhing and whining prettily. he made a mental note to thank solomon for the spell that had his little human begging for more, please, always, forever.

[itgetzweird08]

Okay But Imagine If Endeavor had a secret love child

(TW: Mentions of cheating, hints towards abuse, hints towards pregnancy)

Okay so just imagine. Me personally, Enji Todoroki does not seem like a loyal man in the SLIGHTEST with his track record. Like I could definitely see him going to clubs and hooking up with people while on missions out of the country to let off steam because he has a wife who he doesn’t love, a son that is a danger to himself and doesn’t know what it means to quit, and two other children who are ‘failed experiments’

Enji is hella motivated to accomplish his mission to create the most powerful kid, HOWEVER, he’s still human. I think deep deep down he might want some form of true love and human connection. And that’s where /she/ comes in. The gorgeous woman that he meets in a diner one late night in America, while trying to get a decent meal after a hard mission. Any place that would even come close to having something that fits his meal plan is closed, but he knows he needs to eat. So this seemed like his best option.

He enters the diner, and it’s sorta dark and is cheap as all hell. He had half a mind to turn around and just starve, but the smell of something fried hit his nose and he gave up that thought quickly. He picked his own seat, a booth in the back next to a window that hadn’t been cleaned in a while. His hand touched something sticky on the table, and his lip curled in disgust. But that curl turned into a small ‘o’ as his jaw dropped, his eyes catching the waitress that was walking towards his booth. He was never a love at first sight kind of man, especially when he gave up such a silly concept long ago, but this was enough to make him get on his knees and praise Cupid. It felt like an arrow of warmth and desire had been shot through his chest. He had a fire quirk but nothing had made him feel so hot.

Rei and the kids were nothing but a distant thought all the way in the back of his brain stem when the woman approached his table. She seemed other worldly, tall and full and brave and soft. Something about her full curls and dark skin gave nothing less than goddess. There was so much to look at but there felt like so little time to take in everything she had to offer.

A soft clearing of her throat though brought him out of his stupor.

“Can I get you anything, sugar?”

The nickname made him blush, heat rushing to his face. It was a miracle his skin didn’t alight with his flame. “Yes- my apologies. Let me get, um,” here he was, sweating and stuttering like a school boy. Pathetic- he was pathetic. Before he could get truly angry at himself, she laughed, and the sound was like a drug.

“Here, you seem like you’ve been working hard. Let me get you a coffee and a proper menu, and I’ll come back for ya. Sound good?”

And all he could do is nod with a fry mouth, his face so hot he could’ve sworn his quirk was activated.

When she came back, she poured him a coffee, asking if he was from around while he browsed the menu. He said no, and told her of his hero work and his home in Japan. She listened with open ears and heart, finding herself sitting in the booth to listen to the scarlet haired man. She took the extra mug on the table, pouring herself a cup and loading it with mini creamers and sugar packets. It was a complete contrast to Enji’s own pitch black cup. But he didn’t mind. He honestly found it cute. He wondered if the sugar in the coffee was apart of what made the woman so sweet.

One cup of coffee turned to two. And that two turned to three with two waffle specials and a bowl of fruit to share. That ended up being a free meal for him and a ride home for her after her long shift. And the kiss at the door, well…you can guess where that led.

He left in the morning before she could wake, as he had a flight to catch by that noon. But he left her with a parting gift: his cell number and the large jacket he gave her when the night breeze got too cold.

Their affair continued for a while. It didn’t help Enji that Touya was putting himself in more danger, Rei seemed to be increasingly more difficult to deal with, and like her body got tired of the constant trying for his perfectly quirked child. And he knew it was wrong, of course he did, but when had that ever been enough to stop him? He began making up missions and lies, just to fly back across the sea to see his gorgeous waitress. And every time he left her a gift. A diamond charm bracelet, a new pair of shoes, a heart felt note with Godiva chocolates. And all she did in return was make him feel alive, like his life was worth more then it ever had been.

Six months.

It all lasted six months.

That was until he got the call from Rei, mid flight across the ocean, that she was pregnant. All thoughts of love and happiness and the small whisp of desire to leave his family behind and start a new one with his lover was erased. He had a feeling. This was it, his perfect child. He had the pilot turn the plane around, leaving his doll with one last parting gift.

The baby growing within her.

This time? He didn’t look back.

[klbwriting]

Broken Prism

Chapter 4

Fandom: Red Hood

Pairing: Jason Toddxfemale!Reader

Warnings: none

Summary: Jason reflects on his return to the city and you come face to face with Batman

After returning to Gotham six months ago Jason started to relearn the ebbs and flows of the city right away, like he hadn’t been gone for almost seven years. He started by patrolling the same routes he and Batman once had, seeing what Batman and his replacement were up to. He followed their path, seeing how it changed or stayed the same. He was trying to assess their patterns and maybe get an inkling to what happened when he died. He could remember a decent amount about his past, prior to the pit and the league. Five years of spending nights trying to stay awake, avoiding nightmares of cold steel and screeching, gave a person a lot of time thinking and thinking led to remembering. The only thing he couldn’t fully put together in his mind was how he had actually died. He figured it had something to do with Batman, why else would he dream about a bat attacking him so much? He wasn’t a psychiatrist, but he figured it wasn’t that hard to put those pieces together. However, after following the Batman and his new protégé for a few weeks nothing sparked except more memories of patrols just like they were doing. Taking out bad guys, helping innocents, the usual good vigilante stuff. He noticed Batman still didn’t kill and it sickened him. He had studied more than his fair share of villains in his time with the league and if any of those ‘people’ deserved to die it was the ones living in Gotham. After he had learned all that he could he had turned to part two of his return scheme. Money, territory, power.

While following Batman and new Robin he had noticed that they didn’t pay too much attention to the lower-level criminals like drug dealers. Honestly, between Penguin, Mr. Fries, Two-Face and the rest when would they have time? So he had gotten to work. A couple hours of beheading lieutenants and meeting with the bosses he had a whole little crew of dealers, 40 percent of their sales, and no one dealing to kids anymore. If they did it was a bullet between the eyes, no questions asked. A few challenged him, not paying up or still dealing around the schools. They were soon found by GCPD, a bullet in the brain and maybe some extra cuts and bruises for when Jason felt extra annoyed. The cash the dealers gave him supplied him well enough to establish some safehouses, get extra gear, and make sure that enough cops were paid to stay away from him business.

Once this was finished Jason decided to check out Arkham, see who was actually locked up and who was just rumored to be in the asylum. He stalked the halls, quiet like Batman taught him to be, using shadows and the old architecture to his advantage. He found Two-Face, Calendar Man, Clayface, Hush, all locked up. He was heading down a part of the old wing when he first heard the laugh, or was it sobbing, or maybe screaming? It sounded like a horrible medley of all three. As soon as it hit his ears he froze, encased in shadow and in the past. That laugh, a crowbar, a bomb. The Joker. Jason’s heart raced, the read out on his helmet said that it was getting too high, he needed to calm down or risk a panic attack, a heart attack, death by laughter. He started breathing too fast through his nose, hyperventilating. His eyes flashed around, frantic. He needed to leave, get out of this place as fast as he could.

He wasn’t 100 percent sure how he had escaped unseen but he didn’t stop running until he was knee deep in the river, the realization that his pants were wet making him snap out of his trance. Joker had killed him. Hours of torture, bones broken, scars that the pit psychically healed but would never heal in his soul, then a bomb, the fire and the light to end everything. Why was it that Jason had died but that motherfucker was still alive? Batman had to have known who had killed him. Who had taken him from this earth and put him inside of it. Why hadn’t he killed him? Did Jason really matter so little that Batman had just wandered off, letting Joker keep his breath and just replacing him with a newer model Robin? Jason saw green, snarling like an animal. He stomped back to where he had left his bike and headed into East End. If there was anyone who deserved a few bullets, maybe some broken skulls, they would be there. Jason needed to kill and to think. Now, months later and still no where less pissed off about Batman’s ridiculous no kill rule Jason watched his former mentor stalking the city, looking for something. Probably that woman who had showed up at his house and stolen his car. His soulmate. Jason still couldn’t believe that he had a soulmate, and she still must be his since his world was still colorful. He could see the bright neon signs, all pinks and oranges and greens, see the attempts the city made of parks and flowers and landscaping in lush yellows and blues. And he saw how the red of his helmet gleaned when he walked by a window, too bad not everyone got to see these things. He couldn’t remember the world in black and white and gray, that seemed like a lifetime ago. He supposed it was. Jason still had his mission on his mind, taking down the Batman, killing Joker, all of that, but her eyes had distracted him momentarily. He wanted to know what Batman was going to do to her, wanted to make sure she was safe from the lies that Bruce Wayne tells those he thinks he can manipulate and use. She wasn’t going to be a pawn for his bullshit.

Jason perched on a fire escape overlooking a back alley. He could see her window across the street, she was in the apartment, probably her bedroom, at a desk typing. The rain was blurring her face a little, but he could still see that she was focused, and he wished he knew on what. He wished he knew her thoughts, her likes, dislikes, he wanted to know her favorite color now that she could see them. And he wanted to know her name above everything else. He knew he could go figure it out, use the records database and find her name based on her address, but he wanted to hear her tell him it, hear her voice say her name, say his name. He could see why Batman had thought he had been too young for a soulmate. This drive to be around her was becoming all consuming and Jason couldn’t tell if it was because she was just his soulmate or if it was because a soulmate meant that he still had a soul, something in him might still be worth saving to someone. If she had known him, would she have killed Joker? Did she mourn him when her world had gone back to black and white? Had she been confused to see the color return? So many questions and he was too scared to get his answers. He heard the familiar sound of quiet settle around him, Batman was lurking. He looked around, keeping himself silent as he used his helmets readout to track the vigilante on the roof of her building. He scaled down the side of it, effortlessly opening the window to what was probably the living room, disengaging the alarm that was there. He knocked on her bedroom door, making her get up and answer, clearly confused and worried, she pulled out a switchblade from her pocket before opening the bedroom door. Jason turned on his enhanced hearing device to listen into the conversation.

“What the fuck?” you said, hearing someone knock at your bedroom door. You had roommates but they were out of Gotham for the weekend, escaping the dreary city in search of sunshine that lasted more than five minutes a day. No one should be in your apartment, let alone knocking at your bedroom door. You took out the blade you carried, flipping it open, ready to start stabbing, opening the door quickly, throwing your weight against the intruder, knife pressing and…breaking. You frowned, feeling the stone muscle of armor, shoving uselessly against it. The blade of your knife had broken and gone flying off onto your bed. You looked up and swallowed. Batman, well fuck, he must be mad you stole his car.

“YN YLN?” Batman said, voice graveled, but you could hear the lilt of Bruce Wayne’s fancy rich tone underneath. You stepped back, breathing deep as you calmed down. He probably wouldn’t kill you, wasn’t that his rule?

“Bruce Waynes?” you mocked back, mimicking his deep bass. You thought you saw the uptick of his lips into a smirk, but it was gone fast enough that you could have imagined it. “I left your car in a nice part of town, I’m sure it's already back in your garage.”

“I’m not here about a car,” he said. You weren’t entirely surprised. “Can we talk for a minute?” At least he was polite after the breaking and entering. You motioned to the living room, wanting to get his hulking mass out of your safe space. He went back to the living room, standing in the middle. It wasn’t a big room either, but it was enough for you and your two friends. You felt strange sitting down as he stood so you got up again, busying yourself by tidying up. It didn’t need a lot of picking up, you were clean by nature, keeping mostly everything in place, but you needed to do something with your hands.

“So what do you want?” you asked, putting away a book before going to the small kitchen area to do the few dishes in the sink.

“Why did you ask about Robin?” he asked. You looked at him. “Who are you?”

“You replaced him, you replaced my soulmate,” you said. You knew he had fancy gadgets to see if people were lying so you figured why bother? Not like him knowing this truth would matter. Robin may have been alive out there but despite your best efforts you hadn’t been able to find anything about him, just that Joker had killed him in some other country almost seven years ago. You were able to see a subtle sign of surprise on Batman’s face, his lips thinning out at the revelation.

“I didn’t replace him,” he said, but it sounded lame, an excuse. “There were others who needed my help and I need help for them.” You felt white hot anger course through you.

“You replaced him because you were too weak to save him! You couldn’t even kill his murderer, what the fuck is wrong with you? Why isn’t Joker cut up into pieces and decaying at the bottom of some endless pit somewhere?” you demanded, throwing a glass at him. He deflected it and it shattered into pieces. “Where is that Robin now?” You assumed Batman must know about the return of his former partner. The silence stretched out.

“J-…”

“Don’t say his name, I don’t want to hear his name from anyone but him,” you said, holding up a hand. The silence went on again.

“That Robin is dead, you said it yourself,” Batman replied, clearly confused. You froze.

“You don’t know,” you said. He had no idea that Robin was back, somewhere in the world, he was alive. You had assumed he would return to Gotham, find Batman and join back up in the cause, or maybe get some type of revenge. But nothing, nothing except for that new guy, the one no one could figure out. The one they called Red Hood. The one who had fled at the sight of you. Your brain was whirring and you were worried Batman would hear the gears turning. “Get out.” You left no room for argument, and it appeared he wasn’t exactly sure what to say to you next, so he left the way he came in. You fixed the alarm and closed the window, cleaning up the broken glass and going back to your room. You needed to figure out how to contact the Red Hood. Either he knew about Robin or…or he was Robin.

[junkiepunkie]

just a lil tiny bit from my Harry Potter era Wolfstar fic

tw: drug use (weed.)

September 3rd, 1993.

Day two of Remus Lupin's teaching career started with a bad omen. His dream was filled with exclusively him. That stupid dog! He had tossed and turned for hours until he finally just gave in and crawled out of bed. He had yet to fully unpack his trunk and fill his small astronomy tower bedroom with clutter, not that he owned too much, but what he did was mostly sentimental rather than practical. One thing he did unpack as soon as he arrived however was his 'medicine', both his Wolfsbane and  his more human medication. He plucked, from his desk drawer a small sandwich bag, half-filled with weed, as well as a wad of rolling papers.He withdrew two rolling papers and laid out a generous amount of cannabis, swiftly rolling his blunt and licking it shut and searching around aimlessly for his wand. He looked around his room, which was only lit by his wand light for a solid three minutes before he clocked that he was holding it the whole time. He laughed half-heartedly at his stupidity, knowing it would have cracked up a room full of his friends. It never will now, but it really would've. 

He sat his wand at an angle on his desk so that just enough light would reach him when he went back to bed without it giving his already fried brain a migraine, then he took his insomnia remedy and clicked his fingers, producing fire from his fingertips for just a moment to light it. The first inhale was didn't hit him but the second was fucking orgasmic. Remus felt his head lull backwards until it hit his pillow with a thud. The pain that ran constant in his joints dulled -it didn't fade, just dropped on his list of priorities- and the thought of Sirius Black, for a period, died. Then, with his brief emptiness of mind, he drifted into a delightfully dreamless sleep.

[amourtoken]

sugar daddy Will has eaten away at my brain like a parasite so here's a lil continuation off that ask

*NSFW below the cut, MDNI*

cw: semi public activities, nervous as fuck Will, dare I say nearly subby will??, car sex, handjobs, raw sex, nipple play, oral (implied)

♡ I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVD-

♡ he's been pacing around his house all fucking day waiting to come see you, throwing on 100 different outfits and hating all of them cause he can't decide what vibe to go for and he's also got like 1000 different gifts for you even tho he just brought you well over $1k in jewelry like 3 days ago. Why is his heart racing so fast and his stomach fluttering so terribly??? This feels like a middle school crush. You're just so lovely :((

♡ you'd finally agreed to hang out with him outside of your club, just the two of you. It took a little convincing but you liked him as much as he likes you and he treats you so differently compared to other clients you've had. You'd like a genuine connection with him. The gifts aren't even the main reason but damn they're nice.

♡ he had a whole plan but the second you got in his car in that pretty Lil black dress he got you a few weeks back and all of the jewelry he picked out for you his brain fried. He kept stuttering while talking to you and his hands were shaking so bad it extended to his whole body. You leaned in for a hug and he eagerly pulled you tightly to him, breathing you in and admiring the sweet smell you chose to wear that day. He didn't wanna let you but relented when you pulled back a bit

♡ you rested your hand on his thigh while he was driving and it was over lol. He was shaking so bad he literally could not continue driving. Thankfully it was already pretty dark out so pulling over wouldn't be too suspicious. You feigned confusion but knew exactly what you did lol

♡ will nearly drug you over to his side of the car, both hands holding your face to press his lips to yours without a word. You happily returned the kiss of course, but it was still so fucking messy. One of those kisses where teeth clash and you wonder if it can even really be considered a kiss. His fingers laced in your hair and he relished at the feeling, you'd done it so well but he couldn't help himself.

♡ you kept your hand on his thigh, sliding up further as the kiss continued. Your manicured nails (that he paid for) tracing shapes against his skin through his pants and feeling the way his leg bounced anxiously. Poor thing :( it didn't help when you palmed him through his pants and tugged at his zipper either. He felt like he was gonna pass out.

♡ he brushed your hands off, undoing his pants himself and tugging them down just enough to free his length which was pathetically hard and nearly dripping pre cum from barely even making out for a minute. You wrapped your hand around his cock and his head fell back against the seat, moaning and trying to catch his breath. He looked so good like this ugh.

♡ after a minute one of his hands came to wrap around yours, squeezing lightly and changing the rhythm you were stroking him at.

"Faster, please- like this-"

♡ you followed his direction and his hips bucked up into your hand, he was covering his mouth to try and muffle some of the sounds he was making but truthfully it wasn't helping. You didn't even need lube or anything to get him off, his cock was leaking and twitching in your palm so much and his legs were shaking. He wanted you so fucking bad he couldn't even begin to voice it. It felt like his skin was on fire and electric currents were flickering through his veins.

"F-fuck- fuck- wait, 'm gonna cum- please- w-wanna cum inside please-"

♡ he was stuttering so much and tripping over his words he wanted to say a million things at once but could barely get anything out. You continued stroking his cock until he was right at the edge, brushing your thumb across the slit pulling the most needy whimper from his throat before stopping. This time he did practically drag you across the console to his side, having you straddle his hips while he frantically hiked your dress up and tugged your panties to the side.

"Is this okay? Need you so bad.."

♡ he brushed his tip through your folds, nudging against your clit and making you jolt at the feeling. His free hand came up from it's spot on your hip to tug the front of your dress down, his eyes glued to your now bare tits. He didn't think one person could possibly be so perfect until he met you.

♡ Will buried his face in your chest as he sank into you, a deep groan falling from his lips as he pressed sloppy kisses to your tits and it didn't take very long for him to set a nearly violent rhythm of his hips. Your fingers laced in his hair while he fucked into you, one hand tugging at your nipple and massaging your chest while his mouth worked at the other. He was moaning and whining freely while his tongue lapped at your now sore nipple. He wanted to taste and feel all of you and you were enveloping every sense he had in the most overwhelming way.

♡ the burning in his stomach came back 10 times as bad as before, his hips stuttered against yours while he tried to drag the feeling out as long as he could. He didn't wanna cum yet but he couldn't help it if things kept up this way. You were rocking your hips against his just right and tugging his hair to direct his attention at your chest. How had he gone this long without you? His moans were pitching a little higher and he wrapped both arms tight around your waist as he drilled into you like he'd never have the chance again.

"B-baby- fuck, pussy so fucking good- oh god-"

"Gripping me so fuckin' tight- feels like this pussy was made for me-"

"Feel so fucking good- fuck angel- can I cum inside? Please- please tell me I can"

♡ every thrust he was sinking in as deep as he could get and near bruising your cervix, with his arms around your waist he managed to fuck up into you even harder. His orgasm caught him off guard and the arms around you tightened so hard you could barely breathe. Will whimpered into your neck and tears pricked at his vision as he twitched inside of you, painting your insides with his cum. Poor thing was panting pathetically and holding you tight on his lap as he finished, aftershocks of his end making his legs shake.

♡ Will recovered enough to leave a trail of kisses across your collar and neck, praising you profusely for letting him fuck you and how good you felt. After some of the brain fog cleared he realized you hadn't cum and almost toppled you over begging you to settle in the back seat with him so he could make you cum like he wanted to. Who were you to decline?

♡ will was ungracefully climbing in the back to meet you, roughly tossing your legs over his shoulders and burying his face in your pretty pussy like you deserved for making him cum so fucking hard. Hopefully this counted as a date to you because you weren't going anywhere soon.

[ego-meliorem-esse]

When you say "followed by a raging storm," what do you mean? What does that look like and what does Alfred's 'usual' raging storm entail?

Tw: drug use (yeah sorry)

To be honest its not a very common thing to happen. Just a silly example could be simply overworking himself. And by god, does he overwork himself. Alfred is the sort of person to bottle things up untill they overflow. He will do his work, then the extra work he was given, then he will do the extra work he gave himself, then maybe do a thing on the side, forgetting to take a break for weeks. Months on some occassions.

He realizes he has taken on too much. He will not be able to finish everything on time. At the same time it takes so much for him to get to this point of "i cant do this anymore" but also looking on from the outside it would seem be is folding at the slightest of obstacles.

Then all of a sudden he will break. When he does its usually unsettlingly silent. Its quiet and calm. If he is at a point of raging storm approaching, he will quiety shut down his laptop, turn off his phone, lock all the locls on his doors, and probably just lay himself on the floor. He will eat nothing and drink nothing. Its the whole quiet before the storm situation. Tho the storm in his case has already begun. His mind is working overtime and he cannot focus on a single thought. At this point its difficult to speak to him, he will not form sentences. His mind is a house with dozens of windows, all open. A hurricane is outside. All the windows are creaking, banging and letting in the storm. Which one do you close first? Is it even worth it? What if you close one window and the damn door breaks open due to the storm?

Every little whispering voice of self doubt is screeming at this point. And every critique or simply unkind word by another person/nation set aside is coming into full view.

At this point the only way he knows how to quiet down the thoughts and feelings overflowing is either taking antidepressants and anti anxiety pills stashed away, perscribed by a doctor but untouched untill now, or simply snorting cocaine. At that point he is feeling exhausted, negative and self conscious. Those are relatively unfamilliar grounds. Coke gives him the opposite, something he is used to: the feeling of positivity, energy and confidence.

Absolute shit way of dealing with his feelings. Alfred can be exceptionally intelligent, and he is most of the time. He is stupid tho when it comes to feeling feelings. Zero knowledge. He is just "ew bad feeling, ew ew, go away, no like, have to remove".

Sorry this is probably not the answer you wanted, especially not including drug use but I'm afraid it's 2 am, my brain is fried and I got college tomorrow all day so this is my coping mechanism.

I love my big boy Alfred but he needs to leave the lines alone stg

[erikiara80]

Parallels

I was working on this post and saw these Willel parallels. I took a couple of screenshots, because I noticed something.

Here. Axel mentions schizofrenia as he touches his neck, like Will and Henry (more at the end of the post (*)

In psychiatry, the name Soteria stands for "an alternative low-drug milieu-therapeutic approach to acute schizophrenia".

Also, interesting tattoos, Axel.

Brain damaged. I've talked about this one. I think it's not a coincidence that we only get a close up of it during the police chase in 2x01, because later Axel wears this mask. Same mask at Melvald's, and it's also a parallel to how Brenner Senior looks when he comes back from Dimension X (in S3 Mike says that using too much power could damage El's brain)

I could be wrong, but that little tattoo on his cheekbone reminds me of the blood stain on Henry's cheeckbone. The one that keeps changing, from an X to a Y

And then there's the claw scratching Axel's skin. They're definitely hinting at something, here.

More parallels

In S3, Steve and Robin are the "twins", Dustin calls them Tweedledee and Tweedledum, characters in an English nursery rhyme

And in Through the looking glass, the sequel to Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland. The man who fries Terry's brain is Ray Carroll.

In the TV show Ray is watching, a kid wakes up from a nightmare, hugs his dog and tells his father that he dreamt that his doctor was giving him his shot in his arm. Will being drugged in S2, yes, but the mention of the dog also makes me think about Chester and the vanishing scene.

In fact, El opens the door of Ray's house, like the Demogorgon opens the chain lock in S1.

Another interesting thing is that Ray Carroll did three tours in Vietnam as a MSC officer, so there's also a connection to Hopper (here). And speaking of drugs, Carroll and Alice in Wonderland,

in the 60s and 70s, Alice became a slang term for LSD

There are many references to rabbits and Alice in the show. Alice Creel says that their new house is like a dream. Her brother kills a rabbit, in S1 Jon says that his father forced him to shoot a rabbit. I could go on (and talk about the cigarettes), but here I want to focus on Hopper, Ray, El and Terry.

Ray Carroll->Vietnam->Hopper

Carroll->Alice in Wonderland->Alice->slang for LSD (Kali's powers and her nickname K are also connected to drugs/mind control)

two white rabbits in Jane's room

All the times someone mentions LSD or the word psychedelic, they're talking to Hopper

Powell in 1x03: "LSD mind control experiments"

In 1x06 Becky talks about LSD and psychedelics and then says that Hopper and Terry would've gotten along

Owens in 2x02: "These patterns here are really pretty. I like the design. It's almost psychedelic."

I doubt this is a random line. Look at the orange books behind Owens. In S4 Hopper says that Uncle Sam wanted him to fight in some jungle, and in Vietnam he was exposed to Agent Orange. Yeah, it's all connected to Will, El, Terry, Hopper and Joyce.

(*) There's so much in this shot. The fire and the car make me think about an accident (here, here and here). And Axel touching his neck while mentioning dream circles seems to hint at powers and timeloops

Later in the episode we actually see a burnt car and, imo, a hint at One. No. Ace-> Number One.

[gravedigginbbydoll]

Hawkins University : The Munson Edition

64.media.tumblr.com

AN: Hey, y'all. So this is it. I took 5ever to finish it, I know, but it's been a crazy ride. I wanted to give these two a sweet ending and plenty of room for any future blurbs if I decide to write them. Truth be told, I think I will step away from series writing for now. I will be uploading blurbs, but not as regularly as I used to. Please know I'm here tho and always willing to answer messages.

In an effort to not be corny, I won't blab too much but thank you all for reading my writing. It means the world to me. I've been through a lot while writing this fanfic, and Hawkins Uni has been my own little world that I share with you all. Your interactions, love, and reading mean the world to me. Thank you all so much.

→ cliches: friends to lovers, heavy use of nicknames instead of Y/N, we're all just struggling college kids, Music Tutor! Eddie, Resident Assistant! Reader, good girl x bad boy, instant connections, 'I don't trust most people but I trust you', 'are we friends or more?', and 'I can't believe you're such a slut that you have a special dtf drawer...'

→ warnings: mature topics, insecurity, hurt and comfort, drinking and drug usage, strong language, bullying, mental health, discussion of suicide and self harm, mature thoughts, eventual smut, minors dni

→ pairing: modern!college!eddie x college!fem!reader

<Previous Masterlist

Epilogue

Bug's POV

You stood anxiously, fiddling with your clothes, nerves swirling in your stomach. You’d passed your finals and managed to make it through the semester without a huge hiccup, even passing your Beginner’s Guitar with flying colors. Afterwards, Eddie asked you to accompany him on a date, teasing that the two of you rarely got a moment alone without Robin and Steve third-wheeling. You agreed, despite your apprehension at being seen out in public. You’d not gotten as many glares or dirty looks lately (no doubt due to the Munson boy glaring down anyone who even huffed in your direction.), but you still felt uneasy. 

You and Eddie were going to Frosty’s per your old rituals, then snuggling in bed and watching movies. But something was off. Eddie was smiling lately like he had a secret, and it made you a bit on edge. You shook your head, shaking off bad thoughts and anxiety as best as you could. 

You headed down to the parking lot, only to see Eddie looking as gorgeous as ever in a leather jacket, leaning against a motorbike. His head was tilted back, smoke billowing into the air up above him. He rarely smoked unless stressed. Your stomach tightened further. 

Maybe he wants to break up with you…

I mean…He is a catch…and way out of your league. 

You should just let him get it over with, he’s probably tired of you…

Your brain swirled with anxiety, thoughts drowning out all reason. 

Eddie turned his head over to you, smile blindingly bright. 

“Hey. Ready for our hot date?,” He teased, winking at you, brown eyes glimmering with mischief. 

You smiled as convincingly as you could, your stomach churning. 

“Sure. Let’s go.”

You sat in the furthest booth, the dim area in the usually bright burger joint giving an illusion of privacy. Eddie was sharing his fries with you, flirting blatantly and telling silly stories about his childhood years, how much of a pain he’d been for Wayne to hassle with. 

You tried to calm your nerves, seeing as he wasn’t breaking up with you. At least so far. 

Then, towards the end of the meal, soda watered down and bellies full, Eddie’s face got solemn. 

Your heart squeezed, stomach churning while your hands trembled. 

You never even got to tell him you loved him.

It was silly to think it would last anyway…

You steeled your nerves, trying to brace yourself, using all it took to keep your lip from tremblings, hands shaky and eyes stinging. 

“Look…Y/N,” He started, the use of your name and not some sweet pet name or Bug turning your nerves to ice. 

“I don’t know how to say this…I’ve been wanting to say it for a while. Since I helped you with the whole bullying incident,” He clenched his fists a bit, as if angered by the memory. Your heart was pounding. He held off from a breakup for this long? Why?

He looked up, brown eyes raw and full of emotion, brows furrowed softly. 

“You mean everything to me. You make me want to be a better person. The way you’re absolutely selfless and patient and caring…it’s like a beam of light. I know you always go on and on about how I’m a star…But in reality, I’m the moon reflecting the bright light of you,” Eddies voice was thick with emotion, eyes blinking back tears. 

Your head swam with confusion. You were still tense, readying yourself for the killing blow but loosening up a bit, brows furrowed as you stared at Eddie. 

He reached into his pocket, pulling out a small velvet box and sliding it across to you, his hands a bit shaky. 

You reached out cautiously to it, heart skipping a beat, grabbing for the box. You gingerly opened it, brow furrowing in confusion. Inside was a brand new key, the bronze twinkling up at you in the light. You grabbed at the key, turning it over in your palm. 

“Eddie..What is this?”

He fiddled with his rings, a nervous habit of his that you knew from time spent with him. His eyes darted down to the table avoiding your gaze. 

“It’s a key. To my place…It’s kinda my corny way of asking if you want to move in with me next year,” He smiled crookedly at you, cheeks pink and expression bashful. 

Your heart soared, your eyes beginning to water as you shook softly. 

Eddie’s brows furrowed, getting up quickly to sit next to you in the seat, placing his arm around you. 

“Bug… What’s wrong? Is it too soon? I’m sorry, I just-” 

You shook your head, laughing a bit while tears flowed, leaning into him and hugging him. 

“No, you doofus, I thought you were gonna break up with me!,” You sniffed, heart overflowing with emotions. 

Eddie pulled away looking into your eyes, expression worried and sympathetic. “What? Baby, no. I love you. I would never do that, especially not in a place so important to us.” 

Your heart skipped a beat as you felt everything stop. You blinked away stray tears, looking into Eddie’s warm eyes, feeling your emotions overflow. 

“You…you love me?” 

He nodded, smiling gently, caressing the side of your face. “Of course I do,” He murmured to you, eyes softening. 

You felt your heart soar as you smiled, tears continuing to roll down your cheeks, pulling Eddie in by the shirt for a bruising kiss, his soft gasp making your stomach flutter. You pulled away, smiling, eyes focused on him. 

“I love you too…of course I’ll move in with you.”

Eddie’s grin beamed as he attacked your face with kisses, causing you to squeal as he rambled on between playful pecks. 

“We’ll get you your own mug-” 

“-and start moving your stuff in-”

“-and I can build you a PC-”

You giggled the night away as Eddie continued on his excited planning, even after stopping his attack of kisses, his demeanor even brighter than before. 

That night, when the apartment was quiet and it was almost time for sleep, you and Eddie laid down, whispering promises of shopping sprees and domesticity. You felt like you were on cloud nine, your body relaxing and your heart floating above all your anxieties for the time being. 

Sure you still had issues with insecurity, and anxiety, and life was far from perfect. 

But you’d learned something. 

Maybe life didn’t necessarily have happy endings, but it sure as hell had joy, and you would savor every last drop of it. 

Taglist: @josephquinnsfreckles @corrodedcoffincumslut @kirisuteg0men @bebe07011 @amira0303 @vintagehellfire @lottie-90 @animechick555

[keouil]

nobody wants water this thin

"it's all in his head," yaga tells her. "he's not letting himself heal." 3k. gojo/shoko. angst. also on ao3.

nothing in the cry of cicadas suggests they are about to die. — matsuo bashō

Shoko ran with lightning at her feet.

Missions don’t end when you’ve been surviving on four hours of sleep every night, tending to every body but your own. Missions don't end when one of you doesn't return from one, badly broken and bruised and maimed. Missions don't end when another taps out, saying to themselves this wasn't the kind of life they signed up for. Missions don't end when it's just the two of you against the wreckage of the world, now, and possibly forever: the carnage from all you've lost threatening to split itself from the womb and multiply the grief tenfold. 

It doesn't end, either, when one of you leaves for good. 

When he takes with him, not just the friendship and the years and the trust; but an entire worldview that completely divorced itself from everything you've ever been taught to believe. 

The world keeps going for everyone, but it spins faster you think, when your best friend leaves and the other keeps trying to run himself ragged to the ground for it.

-

Shoko gets there in time to hear Gojo screaming. 

She slows to a crawl just outside the clinic, feeling her entire heart hammering inside her chest and turning her knees delicate. She allows herself a single calming breath, stopping herself just enough to wicker her heart back into its original stitching. He was strong, but she had to be stronger these days. She had to be strong now.

She opens the door expecting to see the worst, only it’s just exactly that, but also so much more.

Gojo was still screaming his lungs out.

Ijichi was currently sprawled all over the hospital bed, frail limbs and arms vainly trying to contain a thrashing Gojo who was doing everything to free himself. There were about a dozen wires drilled into his skin, starting from the top of his head to his arms to his chest to every part of his body, it seemed. He was attached to an IV drip, the end of it dangerously being poached open with all his jostling. He was trying to rip everything off from his body, and not gently.

He had a blindfold on, a thick strip of white cloth spanning the excess of his eyes; but it's not, Shoko dares a step closer to see, it's not doing anything. 

Even from some distance away, she could see the blue in his eyes lighting up like fireflies in the summer. It was practically glowing. 

"Gojo?"

Gojo stills, craning his neck for the sound. Ijichi stops with him, collecting his breath. She can tell he doesn't quite know where she was in the room, her location in relation to him, and was trying to triangulate by sheer sound alone. This, she thinks, should have been her first warning.

"Gojo?" Shoko tries again, approaching the bed slowly. "It's me."

But mostly missions don't end, Shoko thought bitterly, when one of you starts treating them like heroin to a drug addict. When he starts twitching and flinching on mandated days off without the crutch of activity. It doesn’t end when one of you stops caring that you'd rather burn yourself out than be buried with the grief.

“Gojo.”

Gojo finds her eyes first in any room he enters. He can tell it's her by the sound of her sandals on the wooden floor of his dorm room, pliant and soft. He can recognize her by touch alone, sometimes; the feel of soft, cool fingers to his temple when he fried his brain too much and she needed to practice her massages on someone.

But even so Gojo would recognize her without sight, without touch, without feel: often enough, just her alone, was enough.

And so he should have sensed her coming long before she even got there. It would have been easy, she thinks, if he wasn't already delirious.

"Shoko?" she hears Gojo whisper, a hopeful lilt to his voice at the end, like hushed prayers to a pagan god. "Shoko, is that you," he says again, growing a little more desperate, a little more breathless, until it morphs into something like a wail. 

"Shoko.” Gojo croaks. “Help. Help me, oh god, please—I can't fucking see."

-

"It's all in his head," Yaga tells her when they finally sedate Gojo enough to get him unconscious. There are fresh scabs all over his body from trying to rip the needles and wires out, and they're not mending itself as fast as they're used to, because: "He's not letting himself heal."

She was in the lower slums of Hirai when she got the first call, dismissing it as Ijichi probably wanting to ask her for the nth time if she wanted to grab dinner with him. She couldn’t even maintain her longest friendship, what good would another complication do? The second, then, a few hours after: still Ijichi. Now with about twenty texts in varied lengths. She was knee-deep in the guts of a curse, and had literally, her hands full. 

The third one came from Yaga. She picked up on the first ring, and he didn’t wait a beat. It’s Gojo, he said first thing. Get here now.

"What do you mean?" Shoko asks, on her fifth cup of coffee and itching for a cigarette instead to calm her nerves. The clinic was always cold, but it always felt colder when it was someone she knew on the gurney. “I didn’t even know that was possible.”

"I was hoping you could tell me," Yaga says, leaning back into the chair. "You’re the doctor."

"In training, unlicensed, a student," reminds Shoko, glancing unsurely at Gojo’s way. "We’re not taught how to deal with a six eyes user who can't fucking see."

Yaga considers for a moment. "Have you seen his test results?"

Shoko nods grimly. "They're—" she pauses. "Fine. As usual. He's in perfect health."

Yaga gives her a knowing look. “Exactly.”

“Where was he when it happened?” Shoko finds herself asking.

Yaga holds her gaze, unflinching. “Shinjuku.”

-

They were a few months away from graduation. 

A pathetic picture they painted, she thought; just two seniors marching on to the drone of a funeral pyre. Maybe that's why they amped up his missions and her hours, why she wasn't able to keep as close of an eye on him anymore and he let himself be withered so willingly. Otherwise, Shoko thinks, she at least would have seen the first legs of the spiral. The snap of sanity that was always dangling itself in his nose with every extra mission, every sleepless night, every mistake he thought himself responsible for. 

Every body. Every kouhai. Every friend.

Shoko realizes then how much she’d been walking on eggshells around him.

Her breath always in arrest inside of her when he was near, just always waiting to be catapulted into disarray that she laps up as much air as she can. He was always going to snap and she was always going to brave right through it with him, this she knows like a universal truth. Constant fighting, several large-scale tragedies, and numerous breakdowns did that to a person, especially for someone high-strung and battle-ready and grief-stricken as Gojo.

There was always going to be a breaking point. 

But now that it's here, and that it's metastasized into a form that left him blind and manic and deluded, Shoko comes to another realization of her own as she looks on at his sleeping body and studies the steady rise and fall of his chest: how wholly unprepared she is for it. 

-

Gojo escaped in the middle of the night.

He couldn't have gotten far, barefoot and drugged up on psychedelics as he was. His normally traceless trail left bread crumbs all over the school and the outskirts of the mountain, sloppy and disjointed. His eyes still weren't working right and it was obvious in the jagged evidence of his sleepwalking, wandering around aimlessly and with no regard for his safety.

Eventually someone—she really hopes it wasn’t Ijichi or another first year—found him by the torii gates, shivering in nothing but his flimsy strip of a hospital gown, cold and numb and mumbling nonsense to himself. His feet were bloody, fresh scrapes to his knees and arms. He was curled in on himself, knees tucked out from under him like an infant as he rocked back and forth. 

Shoko notes with some degree of unease it was exactly the same place he died.

Gojo did it again the next day. And the next day. And then the next.

They kept having to drag him back in, kicking and screaming and having to be drugged into obedience. He struggled against them all relentlessly, fangs out and voice biting. They had to bring in more people from the outside, because even Gojo at his most disoriented was stronger than the force of a hundred men. When he started scratching at his eyes, Yaga finally decided to throw a straitjacket on him.

And that’s when Gojo started rambling about absolutely everything.

Religious cults, propaganda, death, rebirth. He just wanted a world without all of that now, he moaned, and why couldn't he just understand that? and then started getting angry, started growling incessantly, these goddamn higher ups, i'll kill them all. When they'd finally got him subdued enough to feed him his nightly dose of neuroleptics, started talking slower, like his mind wasn't quite catching up with his reality: w-what have you done to my eyes? where are they? only to start babbling nervously, g-get me getou. he's a third year like me. g-get him will you, he'll fix it, my eyes, he'll fix everything.

It was the most awkward, heart-wrenching thing Shoko had witnessed. 

She didn't quite know how to take all of that in, his delusion and desperation, even as she saw it happening right in front of her. He was falling apart from right under their noses, his pain so colossal and angry and loud—that even some of the elders who insisted on monitoring his progress had to look away sometimes. It's not a Gojo they're familiar with, she knows, this body of wires and chords and stitches.

But where they had the luxury of turning away, Shoko could do nothing but hold his pain in and let it sweep over her like a river makes its way to the deep bottomless sea.

Unstopping. Unlooking. Without end. 

A forever thing.

And so she stood there, night after night, looking nimbly on as they kept pumping his body full of tranquilizers and hypnotics. To sedate. To soothe. To contain. And Shoko wants to ask them sometimes, what exactly it was they thought they were keeping in? The grief or the anger or the impending explosion? Maybe a little bit of everything, then, she thought. Gojo certainly had enough to light up the world bare and burn it down to its skeletal frame.

Bare bones.  

She watched in horror as everyone tried their best to placate him night after night. 

Ijichi, still so young and so unprepared and their responsibility, still maintain that deadly persistent idol worship for him that Shoko didn't have the heart to tell him heroes only end in tragedies. He'd know soon enough. Yaga, a steady presence around them that never wavered, never showed any real panic in this impossible situation; hold him down and explain to a clearly hysterical Gojo that suddenly just looked so and only 18 and nothing else: that Haibara had been gone for a while, remember, you were his pallbearer. Nanami too, yes, but—but—not to worry because they’ll get him back. Yes, they’ll find him right away, and Getou too.

Shoko’s heart ached. 

What was there left to break of her after this, she wonders? 

Off they went, day by day, just trying to soothe and ground him back down to a place they brought him up too high that he had no choice but to crash. But even Icarus plummeted right to his death: watching Gojo splinter parts of himself for everyone to see, in slow crawls, just felt like a cruel fate by the gods to drag out every piece of his misery until he all but drowned himself in it.

And she could do nothing except look on and try her best to keep him alive, shell-shocked, feeling her entire worldview shatter inside and eat its way to every part of her body.

Bare bones.

-

Yaga had to let important people abroad know. Ijichi had to cover a few missions.

And so one night when the stirring began, when she heard the rustle of cloth being shoved around and a slow groan as his muscles strained in protest from being locked in and Gojo all but tore through his restraints: Shoko was alone.

He's not going to hurt me, was her first thought, sensing his growing alarm as he kept looking around with blind eyes and probably sensing the energy of the room stale and empty. He's not going to hurt me.

Then his eyes lock on her.

"Amanai?"

Shoko feels her entire body go still. 

Oh god, she thought. Her hair.

Oh god, she thought. His grief.

Oh god, she thought, finally, her soul weeping: I’m so sorry, Gojo.

Shoko doesn't trust her voice, her body, her soul. Gojo thinks he can see now, but he wasn't seeing her. He was seeing a vision of someone he wanted so badly to imprint to reality he was willing his eyes to project it for him. He was starting to blink out the disorientation, nimble arms moving to stand up from the bed.

"Wait," Shoko finds herself saying, trying to get closer but feeling her legs melt right into the floor along with all logical reasoning. "Just—just wait. Gojo. Don't."

"A-Amanai," Gojo ignores the voice that didn’t match in his head, stops fumbling enough to tilt his head at her as he blinks more of her into vision. Hands fisting at his sides he was already drawing blood, whimpers, "Amanai. I'm—" he stops, choking on the words scratchy at his throat. "Oh god. I'm s-sorry—..I-I'm s-so sorry, you were so young, ohgod—"

Shoko finds her legs making careful, shaky steps towards him. "Gojo," she starts gently. "Gojo, it's okay. You’re okay."

"No, no, no," he mewls, voice rising an octave, reaching up to tear his blindfold open as he starts trying to gouge his eyes out. The air in the room instantly shifts, becoming more and more claustrophobic. He was sucking all the energy out, his cursed energy manic and spiking.

"Nothing is okay! It’s...—" he hiccups, stammering, "...I-It's all wrong. Get it out of me! I-I want it out, get it out! Now!"

Shoko wants to ask what, what does he want out of him exactly, the ghosts or his eyes or both? But no sooner is she opening her mouth his eyes flash red and suddenly the energy isn’t just suffocating: it’s downright punishing.

He could so easily kill now, she thinks, without remorse.

Even himself—more importantly—himself.

“Gojo,” she manages to get to his bed in time, forcing his hands down and sending a bout of cooling energy to get him to stop. Ignoring the way blood was starting to pool from his eyes, she meets hard flesh and even harsher lines of cursed energy; and even then it’s always been dominating, but it had never felt so oppressive. 

“Gojo.” Shoko tries again, sending calming droughts into his nerves slowly but steadily. “Stop. You’re hurting yourself. Calm down. Now.”

He kept trying to fight her, hissing at Amanai to get away or he’ll hurt her. He very nearly does when he strikes a palm out and carves a scar right down her knuckles, leaving behind wet trails of blood, but still Shoko held. 

When his delirium had finally waned—but even that was a stretch—the muddled vision in his eyes started to clear a little.

But as he took in everything anew, the clinic he liked hiding in to to get away from classes, the sterile tools he always played with to annoy her, the smell and feel and look of the place slipping back into familiarity; and then the blindfold, oh god the blindfold: he just shattered.

Gojo sobbed harder than Shoko has ever seen him do, pounding and beating down on his own chest she's sure she heard ribs crack. He wailed and howled, crippled by the compounded grief and loss and despair and agony no eighteen year old should ever feel. He poked at all his bindings, tearing them apart from the flesh, leaving a chain of angry red gashes of blood and skin. He was opening up fresh wounds and ripping them anew. His hands were bloody and sticky, his eyes so blown out with pools of tears that just didn’t cease.

Shoko could do nothing but fight back her own.

She tried to force him back into his cot again, unsteady arms struggling to get him into his straitjacket, and still through it all Gojo heaved and yelled and cried out: about human evolution and revolutions, about star plasmas, about wars and propaganda and politics and the higher ups, and could they just fucking stop making murderers out of sorcerers and stop treating us like we're dispensable and how he was so goddamn tired of it all, the expectation, the missions, the funerals, and how he should've just stayed dead and i fucking hate it here so stop, just stop, please, fucking kill me already.

An axe through her heart. 

A gun to her head. 

A million needles sinking into her skin. 

Getou leaving them a second time. 

Shoko thinks as she looks on at the pure, unadulterated agony on Gojo's eyes, thinks yes: those would hurt more.

Instead she summons her bones back into her body and steels them, fiber to fiber and joint to joint. Because to her, who has never known pain like he does, strength looks like this:

"You don't mean that," Shoko finds her voice in time, successfully biting back tears as she focused all her attention to keeping him stable, the thunder in her heart just background noise. "Don't say that, Gojo, please, I'll fix it," she manages to add without breaking. "I'll—I'll fix your eyes. I'll fix everything."

“My dearest darling Shoko.”

Gojo says suddenly, sweetly, suddenly so like her Gojo that she had to take pause and watch as he trailed a bloodied hand down her face. When she looks up, the glint in his eye was teasing, but dangerous; like they were driving headfirst into the edge of a cliff with nothing but his hands behind the wheel for her to trustfall into.

“I hurt in places you can’t heal.”

[lighterfluid1]

Getting absolutly buttfuck baked with the bakusquad

☆ GN!READER ☆

!! WARNINGS; mentions of drugs and alcohol !!

☆ KATSUKI BAKUGO;

At first, Katsuki couldn't be bothered to sink down to you and the rest of your friends level's. He thought doing drugs was fucking stupid.

But knowing you and your friends, you weren't just going to let him miss out on all the fun.

"What, y'too scared Kacchan~!" Denki teases. It took quite the effort to finally get him to at least try it.

Sero had been the one to bring the bong, since he was the stonner of the group. And since he was experienced, he tried to teach Katsuki how to do it but...but he wouldn't have it.

"SHUT UP YOU MORON! I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!"

He obviously didn't, especially since after lighting it he inhailed half of the smoke inside.

After getting hit with that shit, he had completely forgotten his will to live. This was a completely different Katsuki Bakugo then the one you knew.

As he sat on the couch, zonning out into the abyss Kirishima approched him. The other weed virgin of the group.

"DUDE! ARE YOU OKAY?!" He shouted, shaking Katsuki's body. Kirishima was also hessitant to try, but him and Katsuki both pretty much had the same weakness.

After a few more minutes he eventually fell asleep on the couch.

☆ EIJIRO KIRISHIMA;

Similar to Bakugo, he wasn't sure about smoking for the first time. But unlike Katsuki, he was just scared. Poor guy.

You all knew that if he really didn't want to, you'd back off but after all your convincing he finally gave in.

"YEAHH! YOUR THE MAN!" Denki shouted, Kirishima going in for the puff. But him being inexperienced...he didn't know how to light that shit.

"Thats the side you light...not the side you inhail from." Sero said, holding back tears of laughter. Once Kirishima finally got the hang of it, he took a pretty big hit and immiditally started coughing.

Thats when...Sero brought out the edibles! Kirishima obviously not enjoying himself, immidiatlly melted at the sight of beautifully baked chocolate browniesーstuffed with grass.

After taking a bite, he realised weed just was not for him.

"Who made these?!ーthey're disgusting!" Kirishima whined, spiting out the brownie.

But it didn't take long before Kirishima finally got high. First he was confused, not knowing what the side effects we're, but once he realised he immiditally started laying down.

You Sero and Denki laughed at him as he fell asleep beside Katsuki, who was long gone at this point. You three took pictures, waiting for the moment to show them both.

Since they we're so far goneーthat's when Denki brought out the sharpies. Denki and Sero drew on their faces as you sat back and watched taking small hits.

☆ DENKI KAMINARI;

Denki had gotten stoned with Sero before, since they we're weed buddies but not like this.

The three of you we're doing a who can inhail the most challage while Katsuki and Kirishima slept on the couch.

Denki was first, as he put his mouth up to the circular opening taking a deep breath as he inahiled almost half of what was inside. You and Sero we're quite shocked he managed to inhail so much.

At that point, he had obviously won. But since he inahiled so much he got baked out of his mind.

Denki is the one who usually gets high the fastest, and not to mention he still lacks tolerance...so he naturally gets the most stoned.

When Denki is high...its best to watch him causiously from, afar. This is because when he's on drugs he gets the same side effects that he does after using his quirk. And not only thatーhis quirk kinda goes crazy on whoever is near him.

It's definatly worth watching though, he stumbles around the house doing the most random crap as he murmers shit to himself.

Take your eye's of off him for one second and he's probably passed out somewhere. And in the most non-convenient places too.

He'll walk around completely brain fried and decide that passing out in someones closet is a good idea. Or even in the bathtub.

"Heyーwhere'd Denki go?! I swear I only took my eyes off of him for one minute!" Sero asks franticlly, looking around.

"Who knows...wanna hit?" You reply.

☆ HANTA SERO;

Out of everyone in the group, Sero is the most experienced like I said. But not only that, he also gets the most snacky.

After a few hits hes diging through the pantry without a care in the world.

He'll order an entire pizza for himself and then eat an entire bag of chips, wheither it be your house or his. But he does get pretty stupid too, as if his regular iq isn't low enough.

"Who ordered pizza?" He'll ask.

Not to mention, when he's high everything becomes funny to him. You'll be trying your best to be serious and he'll probably just stand there laughing at you like a moron.

But you have to be honest, you can't stay mad at him forver. Eventually you too will be laughing with him.

Sero being a complete show off, also knows how to do tricks. He'll inhail and shoot out smoke rings awaiting your applause.

But...after hoarding all the food to himself, he'll start hoarding the bong too. It's as if he's not even aware he's high.

Because of this...Sero will probably be the one to green out. But even after throwing up he'll just keep hitting it.

For the sake of his stomach you grab the bong from him waiting for him to fall asleep with everyone else but he just ends up taking shots instead.

You both know he's trying his best to fight his sleepy demons but he can't fight forever, which leads him to pass out at the kitchen counter beside a bottle of booze.

☆ EXTRA;

Once everyone has passed out, your the last one standing. Because your so nice, you make sure everyone is tucked in comfortably for when they wake up. Denki who was on the floor, is now moved to one of the upstairs bedrooms. Sero, passed out on the kicten counter, is moved to the couch. You pop out the leg rests and put a blanket over him as you then tend to Katsuki and Kirishima. As comfortable as they look nuzzled up together, you pop out the leg rests on that side of the couch as wellーgentlly placing a blankets over them.

...

!! All characters are over 18 !!

Ty for reading <3 reblogs and follows are appreciated.

- MILES/SMILES

[thebottomfromhell]

hi I absolutely love your writing!!! may I request the upper moons walking in/hearing reader singing a love song that they're so sure is about them, along with their reactions?

not necessary to add, but it'd be funny if reader had that song playing in their head over and over due to how in love they are while in the middle of a meeting with muzan and him going "what the fuck, who is this for, you're pathetic"

thank you so much for your time!

My brain after reading this ask in bethesda game quest format: *skyrim quest initiation drums* Find a song that at least have love included that represents the Uppermoons.

I loved this concept, call me cringe or whatever but if you have never liked a musical song (movie songs included, don't you go on denial. If you liked disney the stfu) or appreciate a good Opera (the LUNGS these people have, try singing in a threater loud enough for everyone to hear you without a mic, I dare you), then you're missing something.

I'm very sorry for the wait, I hope you like this one too. Thank you for the request too, it's something different and I had fun with it.

Uppermoons and GN reader confessing over a song (Musical AU with modern music and spotify/music youtube)

Songs used: [vid with lyrics + translation if needed]

Gyutaro - Your love is my drug (Kesha)

Gyokko - Prisoner (Jeffree Star)

Sekido - Dark red (Steve Lacy)

Karaku - Perro fiel (Shakira ft. Nicky Jam)

Urogi - Balada (Gusttavo Lima)

Aizetsu - Name of love (Bebe Rexha and Martin Garrix)

Nakime - Boyfriend (Dove Cameron)

Akaza - Love story (Indila)

Douma - Shut up and listen (Nicholas Bonnin)

Kokushibou - Tsuki no curse (Reika Okina)

Warnings: My broken taste in music, sexual content mentioned (in song), sexual content implied, slight drug use mentioned (in song), Akaza sings in french and slight angst, yandere behavior (in song),

Gyutaro:

"Maybe I need some rehab. Or maybe just need some sleep. I got a sick obsession. I'm seein' it in my dreams." Holy SHIT you listen Kesha? He listens Kesha too! His sister was the one to introduce him to the artist and, he admits, the songs are very catchy. "What you got, boy, is hard to find! I think about all the time.I'm all strung out, my heart is fried. I just can't get you off my mind" "Your love is my drug" is not really his favorite from her, "blah blah blah" and "cannibal" take that prize by far (no, it's not because it's fun to sing as if he was high, he doesn't sing... at all... no, Daki, he just said he would not-)

"Because your love, your love! Your love is my drug! Your love, your love, your love!" Fuck. He really didn't mean to, he just... did it. You look at him surprised, you didn't even know he was around. Still you laugh a bit with him as he keeps singing as he forces you into his shoulder and back like he does with Daki. "I said your love, your love, your love is my drug! Your love, your love, your love!" He moves slightly, careful not to drop you, he just looks so active and joyful.

You are addicted to this side of him to, this one it barely shows, that side of him that is actually fun to be with, chaotic and messy the same way he is intimate and caring. This is your guy. "But left to my own devices I'm addicted, it's a crisis. My friends think I've gone crazy." He interrupts again. "OH! I like this part! My judgment's getting kinda hazy. My steeze is gonna be affected if I keep it up like a lovesick crackhead." You let him keep singing, until it gets to a part that is important to you, in ehich you get off Gyutaro to cup his face in your hands, making eye contact.

"I don't care what people say. The rush is worth the price I pay. I get so high when you're with me. But crash and crave you when you leave." There, you got it, you see his eyes glow a little as he keeps looking at you, face blushing. He gets it. He always gets it, even when he doesn't want to. "Wow. Ne, just... wow. This song is perfect for you, y'know?" You chuckle a little at that. "How about you? Do you also feel like that?" He looks at the other side a bit embarrased before nodding. "I do, ne. The song is good. Really good." Maybe that is why you spend the rest of the night singing it, along with other songs from Kesha. It was lovely (Also, he nails it at blah blah blah), you wilk repite it again.

Gyokko:

"I got no regrets. And I remember the day that we met. There was no way that I could forget you.So I followed you home. And I waited 'til you were alone." Ok, Gyokko doesn't even own a home, staying at the house of his victims for a week or so doesn't count, even if you have followed him to one or two of them. He was the one to invite you, the behaviors of this song is not yours. If it had to be someone's, it would be Gyokko's. "And I know this seems so wrong. But I'm just a lovesick criminal."

"Oh! I knew you had good taste, but this is amazing!" You never stfu faster than that, closing your mouth the second you heard Gyokko's voice. You turn around and he seems... cheerful. "You can arrest me, baby, I don't wanna leave. Lock me up, throw away the key. I don't care if I'm in trouble deep. I'm addicted to your love." He keeps singing it, moving with the beat. You knew the song was his taste, but you didn't expect this outcome. "I love that song. One of my favorites. And the fact that you love it too! It's magnificent!" Still, if he is aware of the main reason you like the song, he doesn't let it show.

"I'll be your prisoner. I'll be your prisoner tonight." You keep goin, not knowing if it's to pretend nothing happened or if you are just vibing with it, but you both keep going. "I, I, I, I'm under your spell. And I just can't get enough!" You don't talk about it until you finish the song, but... you will, you can sense it. But you can also see Gyokko smiling, enjoying the time with you. "I'm prepared for all the consequences." "Believe me, I have the worst intentions." "I'm prepared for all the consequences! Believe me, believe me!"

You will be fine.

Sekido:

Sekido is NOT going to apologize, he never even thought about it. Sure, he was rude to you and maybe crossed a line or two, but you made him angry first. You also crossed the line this time! He doesn't even remember what you said to each other, but he remember it was bad. Why would he apologize if he is wondering if he even should forgive you. "Something bad is 'bout to happen to me. I don't know it, but I feel it coming. Might be so sad, might leave my nose running. I just hope she don't wanna leave me." He stopped when he heard your voice.

Sekido was never the one to plead, he was never the one to even ask for things. He is by far the most prideful of the clones. But if you were actually to go, to leave- "Don't you give me up, please don't give up. Honey, I belong with you, and only you, baby. Only you, my girl, only you, babe. Only you, darling, only you, babe. Only you, my girl, only you, babe. Only you, darling, only you." Wouldn't he beg like this, so pitiful and needy, because even if he doesn't want to admit it... he loves you. "Y/N."

He interrupts you, making you just realize he is there. "Is this... how you feel. Or am I reading this wrong?" He gets close slowly, but you can't really answer. You also don't want to be the one to apologize first, to admit you need him as much as he needs you without knowing what he is feeling. After some seconds of silence Sekido looks away and starts singing what you just sand, but more like a murmur, if the lips separated less then it would onlu be a hum. "Don't you give me up, please don't give up. Honey, I belong with you, and only you, baby." It sounds sincere. It is.

None of you apologizes, you both just keep... singing and huming. Just staying together, not wanting to leave. At all.

Karaku:

"C'mon, what were you humming, hot-stuff? I heard you just now. I promise not to laugh even if it's a lame virging song." He is teasing you. Of course he is, but he won't leave you alone until you obey. "How about you sing it? Since the song is clearly stuck in your head." How did he actually convince you? Only Karaku knows, but in the end you do as he says. Maybe you wanted this, to take it out of your chest. He has no way you actually think about him everytime you hum this song. Is like conffesing without actually doing so. "Aquí estás. Ya no puedes detenerte. ¿Dónde vas? Si estoy loco por tenerte." He seems to recognize the song, raising an eyebrow while smirking. "¿Cómo lo iba a saber? Que te vería otra vez. Tú me confundes no sé qué hacer...." You stop.

This is embarrasing, you better leav- "Yo lo que quiero es pasarla bien. Yo tengo miedo de que me guste, y me haga enloquecer. Si eso pasa yo seguiré. Contigo aquí como un perro fiel." Oh.... oh. He likes the song, and you don't know why, but that alone raises your confidence. Specially when he grabs your hand to make you spin around, as if dancing, laughing cheerfuly and loudly when you follow the lead. "Yo tengo miedo de que me guste, y me haga enloquecer." "Like that! Keep it up." You do, sometimes he moves as if to dance, mostly keeping himself roamimg around you, interrupting to sing himself or cheer up at times.

"Dicen que tú eres peligrosa. No le hago caso a esas cosas. Dime qué está pasando. Me tienes como un loco, soy un loco enamorado, eh." "Crazy man in love", that parts come from your heart, because you are in love. He puts one hand behind your head and the other in your waist before going the next part. "Quiero saber cuánto me vas a insistir. Y hasta dónde llegarías por mí. Siento mucho la espera. Pero valdrá la pena cuando te esté besando." "When I kiss you", and he just finishes the verse by doing so. And damn if it isn't worth every damn second of yearning. He speaks again after pulling apart, only inches away from your face. "Best love confession ever, hot-stuff. Very nice to use a "romantic" language. Keep coming for me and I'll keep you as mine, got it?"

What else were you meant to do but nod? Damn, you don't have to be a genius to know where the night is going. And you are going to like it.

Urogi:

For context... You were singing, only to stop when Urogi appeared from the sky. Now he has been following you "C'mon, sing again. PLISS? I like that song, I promise. I just want to hear you sing it." It took less than an hour of whining and puppy-eyes to convince you.

"Eu já lavei o meu carro, regulei o som. Já 'tá tudo preparado, vem que o brega é bom. Menina fica a vontade, entre e faça a festa. Me liga mais tarde, vou adorar, vamos nessa" And Urogi interrupts, to your surprise, singing the next part as he flies around you, grabbing your hands in his, exagerating movements as if dancing. "Gata, me liga, mais tarde tem balada! Quero curtir com você na madrugada! Dançar, pular até o Sol raiar! C'MON, IT'S YOUR TURN Y/N!" You follow the song and repear that same fragment before Urogi steals the next part again.

"O tchê tcherere tchê tchê! Tcherere tchê tchê! Tchê, tchê, tchê!" The song barely says anything at all. It's barely has content, but... it fits Urogi. It's more a thing of vibe than of actual words. "Se você me olhar vou querer te pegar. E depois namorar, curtição. Que hoje vai rolar." Really, it's simple, the song could be sintesized in a "let's party and if I catch your eye let's stay together the whole night", but it's cheerful, full of joy, very light... very Urogi. Maybe that is why you like it.

You are unsure if Urogi gets what you are really feeling, but he gets completely the song. And he does want to stay with you and have fun the whole night. It's a win. You will be able to explain things to him later, but for now. "Gusttavo Lima!"

Aizetsu:

"If I told you this was only gonna hurt. If I warned you that the fire's gonna burn. Would you walk in? Would you let me do it first? Do it all in the name of love?" Just after you finish that part you feel a hand on your shoulder, you turn around to see Aizetsu. You blush at the realization he found you singing, though he is blushing too. "Would you mind if I sing with you?" He doesn't explain himself futher as he asks shyly, you can only nod as he takes a breath to continue the song.

"Would you let me lead you even when you're blind? In the darkness, in the middle of the night. In the silence, when there's no one by your side." He looks at you as if waiting you to join, smiling softly as he offers his hand. "Would you call in the name of love?" You take it. "In the name of love, name of love. In the name of love, name of love. In the name of." You basically also hum together the instrumental, in a softer version. You spare glances on each other, deep and adoring.

"When there's madness, when there's poison in your head." It's almost as if you were actually talking. "When the sadness leaves you broken in your bed." You sure get that Aizetsu means it. Every word of it, that is why he wanted to sing with you. "I will hold you in the depths of your despair." "And it's all in the name of love" And so. "I wanna testify." "Scream in the holy light." "You bring me back to life." And it's all in the name of love. That you look at each other, hold your hands, talk. Because you do talk once you both finish.

"I love you a lot. Do you.. it would make me sad if you were not singing for me like I was singing for you.... but I would unders-" you must interrupt him "I was singing for you too." He smiles softly at you. "Can.... can I kiss you? Please?" No, because you kiss him first. What a lovely song, lovely night, and lovely romance.

Nakime:

"I could be a better boyfriend than him, I could do the shit that he never did. Up all night, I won't quit." Not the type of melody Nakime is used to, the opposite, but it's a nice song. "Thinking I'm gonna steal you from him. I could be such a gentleman." You sing with the most care, because you know she is watching, she is hearing, even if you can't see her. This is her castle, after all.

You know what you are doing, the message that you are giving. Nakime loves music, what better way to confess than with a song. And this is a song which just... vibes with her. You have no idea if she has ever heard it before, but it seems it doesn't matter. "I don't need to tell you twice. All the ways he can't suffice. If I could give you some advice. I would leave with me tonight." It doesn't, because she is talented in her art. So she plays the biwa, making a beat for you to follow. "The universe must have divined this, mmm, mmm. Ladies first, baby, I insist."

"I could be a better boyfriend than him. I could do the shit that he never did. Up all night, I won't quit. Thinking I'm gonna steal you from him. I could be such a gentleman." She sings this part with you, using the biwa to also change the settings. It gets a bit dizzy, but you love the display. She is very proud of her power. "Plus all my clothes would fit." She sings that part alone once you are both in the same room.

You look at her, she smiles at you. Seeing you are not going to sing anymore, she speaks. "I liked your song. Let's do this again some time. It's a date." She says, just before leaving you in your home. A date... you are proud of yourself, that's it. The lesbian power of the song did it trick, like you knew it would. You. Won.

Akaza:

Akaza doesn't know why he hasn't shown himself, he just... got lost in the song. It's one he knows, the melody,, the lyrics, the meaning... "Il n'est pas fou. Il l'aime c'est tout. Il la voit partout. Il l'attend debout. Debout une rose à la main. Non, non plus rien ne le retient." It's a lovely song, he can't think other way to describe it that is not deppressing, to be honest, and he doesn't want to think this song as sad, even if his chest aches a bit with it. "Dans sa love story!" "It's a love story", as said before, he knows the lyrics, he knows the meaning, and Akaza likes it. You keep singing for a while before even realizing he is there, but one second you open your eyes and turn around, facing the golden eyes.

"Em... how long have you been standing there?" You ask embarrased, blushing as Akaza also has some red in his cheeks. He doesn't answer your question, just takes some steps forward to grab gently yet firm, somehow desesperate, your hands into his. "Can you please keep singing? Please?" He asks twice, looking away as he whispers the secon pleading. You decide to just keep singing. "Je serai riche. Et je t'offrirai tout mon or. Et si tu t'en fiches. Je t'attendrai sur le port. Et si tu m'ignores...." "And if you ignore me...."

You know, you have seen, that Akaza is mourning, yearning, or something. You don't know, he himself doesn't know, but that nostalgia and melancholy.... sometimes you feel it takes him away from you. That is why you didn't want him to listen you sing about him, to confess. Because you are unsure id he will "Je t'offrirai mon dernier souffle de vie." "Give you the las breath of my life" and yet he keeps singing for you without letting your hands go. "Dans ma love story!"

"Et il y a toi..." Akaza waits for you to continue, tender and adoring eyes, "Et il y a moi." Yes! There is you. There is! And you are hopeful Akaza is there, is here, too."Et personne n'y croit. Mais l'amour fait d'un fou un roi. Et si tu m'ignores.... J'me battrai encore et encore!" "C'est ta love story!" You take that as a confession, and it shows in your blushed face and adoring eyes, he seems to agree in it. "C'est ta love story!" And of course, you join. "C'est l'histoire d'une vie! Love story!" You just look at each other, not bothering with the world, and giving in to tentation. You both kiss.

(And actually have to talk things through AFTER, you know? This is not a musical, as romantic as it was.)

Douma:

"Shut up and listen. Look at my eyes, don't tell me lies. I need you to tell me truth." You started singing on your own, but Douma got in the room, looking curious. He doesn't move besides closing the door besides him, doesn't speak, just... stands ghere, watching you. But part of you feels like he is urging for more. It's hard to tell, because he always urging for more of everything. "You gotta be clear, tell me the details. I gotta know as much as it hurts. I need you to tell me the truth." More violence, food, attention, power, sensations, pain... it's unclear most of the times. It becomes really hard to tell if he actually likes you.

"Bet you like it when I show up in a gown. Let my body work it out, slow your grind. Don't tell me to stop it, just let me on top and. Baby, you want it, yeah." He sings after you repeat the same part, maybe he hust wanted to do that. If it's because he wants to share the song with you or if he is just messing around... Douma himself probably isn't 100% sure. "When you tie me, do it slow, forget the time. Move position, take me south, ease your mind. Don't tell me to stop it, just let me on top and. Baby, you want it, yeah." He goes to grab you, to press his body against you. He understands the lyrics, not being able to recognize emotions doesn't make him stupid or inmune to sex. This is probably how the night will end.

Maybe it's better that way. "Slow it down if you need to, oh. Show me how just to please you. Ooh, work it out in the sheets. Do me and see through, I want to you feel you." Staying safe, showing intimacy in a way Douma can actually understand it, instead of leaving him guessing and wondering how he should feel. How a normal human, even a normal demon, would feel. You wish these things could be explainede with words in a language Douma fully knows. But the language is not the problem, nor is Douma or you.

You spend the night together, limbs tangling both bodies. Douma is content, satified, you too. Even if you feel like there a lot more things to say, but there is hardly a moment or a way to do so....

Kokushibou:

"Tsuki no kaasu tsumetai yume no naka de....." If you ask Kokushibou, music that is not in japanese is not real music. He is stuck in his own ass, always too focused on tradition and hierarchy and how japan is the "raising sun" blah blah blah. Sometimes he gets very annoying like that, to the point loving him does feel like a curse. "Kotoba no nai sekai de. Bokura wa ai wo kataru. Itsuka kimi ni todoku made..." wait a sec- Kokushibou is behind you, isn't he? You turn around and yep, he is. "Kokushibou-san...."

He keeps quiet for a while, like always, until he finally thinks he has something worth saying. "I like that song. Can you keep singing for me?" You really wanted to say no, but you also wanted to sing for him. After all, this song is recorded in your mind just for him. "Tsuki no kaasu. Tsumetai yume no naka kara. Kimi wo tooku tsuresaritakute. Dokomade yukeru. Ai wo shinjite ii basho made." Maybe another person, demon or human, would have joined and singed with you. Kokushibou did not.

"Dokomade yukeru. Ai wo shinjite ii basho made. Yoru no mukou futari dake de." Ypu finished the song for him, barely getting any reaction. This song is really perfect for you both. "Thank you for singing for me." He barely understands, it's not a surprise for you to have to actually explain it. "I did it because that is how I feel about you." Silence again, you are more than used to it. Kokushibou is not a person of intimacy, of sharing feelings, he clearly doesn't know how to answer back, and part of you feels guilty for putting him in the situation of having to. "I see."

He leaves after that, and you know he will evade you for at least a week or two from know own. If you are lucky he will want to talk about it after that and tell you he feels the same. But until then... it's a "Moon's curse in this icy dream."

Bonus:

Muzan: And then Nakime is going to su-

*Song from above starts playing in the background*

Muzan: Excu- *looking around* ..... Who is playing....?

Akaza: Is something wrong, Muzan-sama?

Muzan: Am I the only one hearing this?

Gyutaro: ..... I don't hear anything.

Nakime: Sorry.

Kokushibou: Hmn?

. . .

Y/N humming with the song on their head: Mhmnhmnhmn mhn hmn hmn mhn.

Muzan: SHUT THE FUCK UP, IT'S BEEN 5 HOURS WITH THAT SAME SONG! AT LEAST PUT SOMETHING DIFFERENT! Pathetic creature, who is this even for?!

[treacheryinblue]

Chapter 3/?

× Elysium (noun) : a place or condition of ideal happiness. type of: fictitious place, imaginary place, mythical place.

Word Count: 9.3k

Masterlist

A Noah Sebastian x OC Series

× Summary: Noah and his new found (sort of) friend, Persephone, battle the trivial ins and outs of being teenagers in a world that doesn't accept you. They survive together all the way into adulthood - with bouts of loneliness included - where the world is still a fickle bitch.

× Warnings!: language, violence, slowburn, friends to lovers to enemies back to friends, rinse and repeat (not even in that order), eventual smut, sexual themes, etc. Each chapter will have its own set of separate warnings.

× Author Notes: ( 1 ) And there I go again with the too much rambling and making chapters entirely too long. What's the preference when it comes to things like this? ( 2 ) Don't forget that there will be no smut or sexual descriptions while Persephone is still a minor aka anytime before 2016. ( 3 ) Another time jump will be coming up within the next chapter. As I stated before, I'm not trying to dwell too long in the past for them, but my brain always has a way of dragging things out. This may also be the last chapter of Seph as a minor... ◔‿◔

× Chapter Warnings!: language, brief sexual themes

SUMMER OF 2014

FRIDAY AUGUST 1st

NOAH

“Did you guys hear about Persephone?” 

Everyone stared at the dark haired girl - now known as Alexa - after she dropped down into the booth next to Folio, waiting for her to continue. 

“Ya know, after her party last weekend?” 

Christ, if this girl didn't just spit it out. Noah didn't want to hear about Seph, no, but he for some reason felt anxious about whatever was about to be revealed. It already wasn't sitting right with him. 

“Well, her parents apparently came home early because someone cut their security cameras back on to the live setting, and they saw all of it. The people, the alcohol, the huge mess she hadn't been able to get cleaned up yet. It was bad.” 

Alexa was nodding as she spoke, though she was now taking a long pause. They could sense she had more to say, so Noah made a face for her to continue, which she huffed and did. Folio’s new girl was cool and all, but damn did she have a flare for the dramatics. She also had this weird power of knowing everything about everyone. It was a little scary.

“A little birdy told me that Seph then had a masssivveee breakdown. I'm talking a full on freak out. She trashed the place even more, broke some priceless vases her mom had, got blood everywhere because she accidentally cut herself on the glass or some shit. Yeah, it was insane. Something legit right out of a movie.” 

Noah was fighting back the urge to spew his lunch everywhere. His stomach was churning, his insides turning every which way, and there was no end in sight for it. He was avoiding everyone's gaze, instead choosing to stare at a blank spot on the table while processing what Alexa was saying. 

“Who did you hear that from?” Nick spoke up, obviously suspicious of the story. He was the only one who really knew what happened between him, Seph, and Maisie that night, so of course he was going to dig deeper. 

“I shouldn't even be telling anyone this, but my brother was a paramedic at the scene. He said he thinks it was all stress induced, but some people are saying she was on drugs.” 

“No, she didn't do drugs.” Noah shook his head, refusing to believe that rumor. It was clear there was a lot that Seph needed to work on, but he wasn't going to let her name be dragged through the mud over something he knew wasn't true. 

“Drugs, no drugs. Doesn't matter. Her parents sent her away to some facility up state but they're telling people she's spending her senior year studying abroad in Sweden or somewhere posh sounding like that.” 

“That's fucking wild,” Folio sighed while shoving a couple of fries into his mouth. “Pretty bummed I only got to go to one of her parties.”

“Shut up, Folio,” Noah heavily exhaled, his thumb and pointer finger rubbing and digging at his eyes. 

There was a part of him that didn't believe it, or rather didn't want to believe it. But if Alexa's brother was there, then he had to admit that was a pretty reliable source. And after what he saw that night, it was all pretty plausible. 

Fucking hell. 

SPRING TO SUMMER 2015

PERSEPHONE 

Fingertips lightly traced the tiny delicate scars that now scattered across the top and bottom of her hands. There was a point months ago when she was worried about how they would heal, nervous as to whether or not they'd always look red and angry. Thankfully that wasn't the case, for they were small and white, barely noticeable unless you were close enough or already knew they were there. The soles of her feet carried identical scars, all because of the shards of glass she had stupidly walked over. 

“We've still never really talked about why you thought you couldn't seek help or guidance, Persephone.” 

Although she heard the older woman’s question, her eyes remained down on her hands. The same scars she had stared at for days upon days were way more interesting than whatever bullshit she was going to try prying from her today. Only sometimes did she give the woman a bit of information, just to tide her over so she could report to her parents that she was making ‘great progress’. 

“You really want to know?” 

“Well, yes, of course.” 

Slowly nodding, Seph took in a deep breath before dropping her hands into her lap and finally lifting her gaze to the older woman. She held her pen at the ready, fully prepped to scribe down anything of importance she may divulge. 

“I figured there was no point in ever telling people about what was happening inside of me. It was best kept inside, like everything else.” 

“Why did you feel that way?”

Seph shrugged, arms crossing over her chest in a defensive manner. Yep, the woman was right on it with that damned pen too. Of course she was going to take note of her stance. 

“Because people don't want to hear about the difficulties of life coming from someone like me.” 

“Someone like you…what does that mean?”

“You know what it means. You're in my father's pocket, after all.” 

Everyone at this ridiculously irritating place was. The only employee she had become slightly friendly with was a second shift nurse who let her use his phone, but of course for a price. Gross, not like that. He wanted money, just as everyone did. $100 for fifteen minutes. Can you believe that? 

The woman eyed her from across the room. She was waiting for her to continue because obviously her smart ass remark wasn't a sufficient answer. 

“Someone who has the means to do anything and everything. Never a need for anything. Someone who has all of their material wants satisfied. That kind of person.” 

Seph twisted her lips and looked out the wall of windows within the office. God, she couldn't wait to be out of this place. 

“People tend to forget that material items aren't everything, though. At the end of the day, they don't fucking mean anything. I can't talk to a purse. I can't voice my frustrations to a goddamn overpriced car.” 

This made her laugh, the sound of it echoing through the otherwise quiet office. Her therapist didn't seem to find it as funny, but that was okay. She wasn't trying to spit jokes at her anyway. It was all the truth. 

“You don't believe your parents could see that you were struggling? What about your friends?”

Ah, of course the woman was going to try to get all the answers she had been seeking from the beginning. A part of her was starting to think that she didn't really care about how Seph was, she just wanted to know all the gritty and secret details of a man’s family who basically owned her. 

“I didn't have friends, not really. Well…I had one, but he was a new friend. He wasn't ready to learn all of my inner workings.” 

Persephone could tell the woman wanted to dive into this ‘he’, but she wasn't going to give her the opportunity. Noah was not going to become a pawn in her sessions that could be used against her. 

“And my parents were never around, so no, they didn't see a damn thing. It took it literally blowing up in their faces for them to notice.” 

That was enough talking for today. Seph was mentally tired of this gymnastics routine she was forced to partake in multiple times a week, and now all she wanted to do was get the hell out of there. Both the office and the facility as a whole. Though mainly the former right then because it was nearing the time for her to be out a hundred bucks. 

Once she was given the ‘okay’ to call it a day, she couldn't have scurried out fast enough. And like perfect clockwork, Ben was waiting outside of her room, ready to collect. They didn't say anything to each other as he slyly slipped his phone to her, then carried on down the hall until he would circle back fifteen minutes later. 

Seph hid within her bathroom, her body uncomfortably seated within the empty bathtub with the curtain drawn. She didn't know why this is where she felt safest making calls, but it's the one and only place she had done it since her first month there. 

One ring. 

Two rings. 

Three rings.

On the fourth, the call connected and she was able to breathe a sigh of relief. 

“Pom,” he answered without missing a beat, his smile easily heard in his tone. 

“Hey, peach,” she softly spoke, immediately feeling more like herself as soon as she was in friendly company. 

“Did you make all the doctors happy today?” 

Seph snorted out a laugh, rolling her eyes to herself. “Well, I didn't threaten any of them, if that's what you mean.”

“Ah, so progress! That warms my heart.” 

“I think they're going to let me come home soon. Therapist number two was really digging in. But how's things there?”

“If you want to ask about him, then you can.” 

The smile she wore slowly began to fade, her eyes fixated on a random spot of her sweatpants that she had started picking at. 

“No…I mean…is he okay? I'm not going to come home to him having lost a leg or something, right?” 

Nick laughed, and she just knew he was shaking his head. “I can say with absolute certainty that all of his limbs are still intact. A one legged front man would be pretty badass though, yeah?” 

As much as Seph wanted to get lost in thoughts of Noah, she couldn't bring herself to do so right then. She had to save that for those particularly hard moments while she was locked away. 

“Did you tell her?” 

A female voice in the background broke through, followed by a hushed response from Nick that she couldn't make out. There was some shuffling on the other side, then he was heavily sighing before speaking up again. 

“Shit, Seph, I hate to do this…but I don't want you to come home and be blindsided.” 

“You're really freaking me out right now.” 

“Alexa heard that your dad…yeah! I'm getting to it!” Again Nick huffed, and this whole thing being drawn out was literally going to cause her heart to beat out of her chest. 

“She heard that your dad is trying to press charges against Maisie…for the video of you and Noah. Some shit about child pornography, I don't know. Apparently she sent it to her brother, so that's not only possessing, but also distributing.” 

“What the actual fuck, Nick?!” Seph quickly covered her mouth with her hand to muffle her outburst, which allowed her a moment to take a deep breath and count to ten. 

“No…how? How is he going to do that when nothing happened in the video? It was just us kissing and his shirt coming off. Not mine!” 

“I'm not a lawyer, Seph, I don't know. That's just what Alexa heard, so it could hold zero weight.” 

“Does Noah know?” 

“Yeah…apparently your dad also paid him a visit…fuck, I wasn't supposed to tell you that.” 

More hushed voices rambled off in the background. The main one she could make out was from Alexa still, but a new one had been added that caught her off guard.

“Who the hell are you being so secretive with?” 

His voice came through loud and clear this time, so Seph assumed he had lowered the phone to play it off like he wasn't on it. Not very smart, Nick. Not smart at all. 

“Huh? No one. I was just gonna order a pizza.” 

“Nick, you're a terrible liar. What are you doing?”

Seph sunk down further in the bathtub, a hand holding her forehead in complete disbelief for what was happening. It was the first time she had heard Noah’s voice since she saw him last, and of course it had to be when she was talking to his best friend on the down low. 

“Pom? Who’s Pom?” 

NOAH

There was a brief moment of tug-of-war as he tried to wrestle the phone from Nick. Never had his best friend kept something from him, at least not to his knowledge, but especially not when he had been caught red handed. 

Finally, Nick gave in and released the device, allowing him to turn it around until he could clearly read the name plastered on the screen. 

“Pom? Who's Pom?” His brows furrowed in confusion, though he still lifted the phone up to his ear. There was no sound on the other end, except for the very faint hint of a breath being taken. Then, the line went dead, the call ending from the other side. 

Nick was staring at him with wide eyes and he could already see the explanation just waiting to escape him. 

“Dude…I'm sorry,” he began, hands holding out in a defensive stance. “Pom is Seph…ya know, like pomegranate? Persephone is a goddess who-”

“I know who Persephone is! I understand the reference, Nick!”

“Right, yeah. You know how she would always say 'you're a peach' to me? Well, she just started calling me peach one day and it stuck, so she became Pom and it was just this dumb thing to help her while she's away, and -”

“You've been talking to her this entire time?”

Nick paused, his body relaxing for a brief moment as he thought back to when their first conversation could've been. 

“Not the entire time…probably since last September?” 

Noah was really hoping Nick could feel the fire in his glare, because boy, was it intense. What the hell was he supposed to do with this information? Should he even be mad? It was honestly the fact that Nick kept it from him that really pissed him off. Why would he? Unless…Seph had asked for him to. 

“She doesn't want to talk to me.” It didn't take much for him to put it all together. Seph was complicated as all hell, but she could be predictable at times too. 

“No, she does. She does, okay? She hasn't straight up told me why she won't, but my guess is that she's embarrassed. I don't know! I'm not an expert on teenage girls!” 

“You two are just best friends now or something?” 

Nick heavily exhaled, his arms dropping down to his sides in defeat. A silence settled between them, one that was just long enough for each of them to gather their thoughts. Or, at least try to. 

“Dude…come on.” Nick shook his head slowly at Noah, a look of disbelief beginning to move across his features. “Don't make me seem like an asshole because I was trying to be there for her.”

That's exactly how Noah saw it, though. Although he wouldn't always have this opinion on the matter, it's how he felt currently. He wanted to be the one there for Seph. He wanted to help her through whatever it was she was struggling with. She wouldn't let him be that person, though, and that's what really stung. 

Fuck, why was he letting a girl he had been friends with for a month plague his mind like this? 

“It's whatever, man. I'll just see her when she gets out, I guess.” 

Noah didn't want this to become a huge conflict between him and Nick. As easy as it would've been for him to argue his point right then, it wasn't worth the headache. Nick was his best friend, and had been for years, while Seph was only just a girl he had developed an infatuation with. 

PERSEPHONE 

“I know it's bad timing, dear, but your father and I expected you to be home next week.”

On and on her mother went during the drive home, all while Seph spent the duration staring out the window. Her fingers were itching to get a hold of her phone but the device had yet to be given back to her - of course. Honestly, she would be surprised if her parents let her have it back at all. 

But at least it seemed like the snow queen was over the disastrous ending that was her beloved vases. 

“But, we’ll have a nice dinner as a family tonight, then he and I will be back Sunday evening.” 

Seph wanted to laugh at how ridiculous her mom sounded. When did they ever have nice dinners together? At least one, if not both, of her parents always ended up wandering off to take business calls in the middle of meals, leaving her to eat alone. What was so nice about that? 

“Does that sound like a plan?” 

Forcing a slight smile, she finally looked over to the older woman and nodded. “Yeah, sounds good to me.” 

Although Seph could tell that her mother was trying, she was curious to know how much of it was genuine. They had never had a strong relationship to begin with, but that was expected given how her parents chose to put their careers ahead of their daughter. Seph used to be sad about it, though she stopped caring as much the older she got. Them not being around sure as hell didn't stop them from putting the pressure on whenever possible. 

× × ×

“No, the doctors said her medications may make her…unlike herself for a bit.” The woman spoke in a murmur to her father upon their arrival home, as if Seph couldn't hear them. 

“A bit? She's been on them for nearly a year now. How much time does it take?” 

“However much it does, Chris. I don't know.” Her mother retorted, the annoyance evident in her tone. 

Seph didn't hear much more because she had made it to the top of the staircase, now aiming straight for her bedroom. She just wanted to be alone for the first time in forever. No worries of nurses and doctors barging in, or the occasional fellow patient that tried to make friends with her. 

There was a sudden halt in her steps when she entered her room. It definitely wasn't how she had left it aka in an utter mess. No, it was thoroughly cleaned now. Nothing out of place. Just as it usually was before things began to truly go downhill for her. Shaking her head to herself, Seph pushed her suitcase off to the side to tend to later, her gaze glancing over to her desk. Lying on top were multiple college applications, as well as letters from others she had applied to before leaving. Columbia, Brown, Dartmouth - ‘her’ top choices. Not really. Those were actually choices that belonged to her parents. 

With furrowed brows, Seph carefully shifted the papers around. Her lips moved as she quietly skimmed over the gist of each letter, her anger bubbling with every word. All the letters claimed acceptance for this year’s fall semester. 

“What the fuck?” She muttered to herself just before she abruptly pulled her hand from the pages. She couldn't handle this right now. The last thing she wanted to think about was what her father had been up to while she was gone. Paying off universities? That was a new low for even him. No way in hell would they have willingly taken her after everything, but Seph was sure their minds were changed as soon as her dad made a hefty donation. How many libraries or community centers now had their name plastered across them? 

“Oh…you've already seen the letters.”

Seph lifted her head to see her mother standing in her doorway, a slight uneasiness to her. 

“Well, they are on my desk. Seems like someone wanted me to see them.” 

Marilyn, the snow queen in question, took in a deep breath and heavily exhaled while crossing the threshold inside. She immediately approached where Seph stood, her own hands frantically shuffling the papers together and then tucking them beneath her arm. 

“No need to worry about those right now.” Reaching back with her free hand, the older woman then retrieved something before extending it out to Seph. It was her phone. 

“I figured you could use a bit of normalcy again.” 

Hesitantly, Seph accepted the device, slowly nodding. 

“Thanks,” she lowly spoke. 

This whole demeanor that her mom was portraying was very out of the ordinary for her. She couldn't help but to be slightly taken back by it. Maybe it made it appear as if she wasn't actually thankful, although she was. Who could blame her for being suspicious, though? After what had happened, this was the last sort of interaction she was expecting. 

“Dinner will be at six, okay?” 

Seph watched as her mother walked away, giving her a small nod in understanding. Once she was gone, she followed the same path she took, only to quietly close the bedroom door to allow her some privacy. There was then a need within her to get her phone turned on. She rushed over to the side of her bed where she typically had her charger plugged in, relieved to see that the cord remained. After inserting it into her phone, she waited a few seconds, then the Apple logo popped up. 

A sigh of relief left her, her body lowering down to sit on the edge of her bed. As the device powered on for the first time in who knows how long, notification after notification began to flash across the screen. 

grl are you okay?? 

i'm worried! 

Alexa 

Heard about your incident. Dramatic. 

Seriously? Call me. 

Stop being a baby. I'm sure daddy made sure you have your phone. 

Sweden? That's laughable. You hate fish. You'd never survive on the cuisine. 

No one believes that's where you are, by the way. 

Your dad is fucking insane!!!! 

Maisie 

babe come on talk to me. 

i’m not mad about you and emo guy. 

maisie showed me the video but it's fuckin dumb. 

lol can't believe you were gonna fuck him tho. 

sweden?? and you didn't tell me?? wtf

Mason 

OMG miss you! 

damn it's gonna suck to not have any infamous Seph parties senior year! 

Aw hope you have so much fun abroad! I loved it when I went! 

u are not gunna believe wat i heard about u

Random “friends”

I miss you. 

Noah 

It was a horrible idea for her to read any of these, but she couldn't bring herself to look away. There were a lot that she deleted, most being from unknown numbers or people she hadn't even spoken to since way before all of this. Everyone obviously just wanted some entail and they thought going directly to the source would work out for them. Oh how wrong they were. 

The last message she read was what really got to her, though. She assumed Noah had known the truth of what happened pretty early on, meaning that his text from only a couple of months ago was honest. That's what she was telling herself, at least. Every other text thread was deleted except for that one, then she started a new one. 

‘Home. Need to see a friendly face.’ 

Seph stared down at the screen as if Nick would have already replied when she knew he was busier than usual these days. The band, working at a tattoo shop, it all left very little downtime for him and the others. But much to her surprise, the little gray bubble appeared, indicating that he was typing. 

‘FUCK YEA DUDE!!’

'Come by the shop!’

'I'm here working on some pieces until probably 9’

It was impossible for her to explain how at ease she now felt knowing someone was excited about her being back, especially when that someone happened to be one of the only people she considered a friend. Getting close to Nick had come out of left field; definitely not done on purpose since she always felt like he only tolerated her for Noah. Who ever would've thought they would've gotten as close as they had while hours away? It was all strictly platonic, though. She looked at Nick as more of a brother type, and she knew he viewed her the same. Well…as a sister, but same sentiment. 

After dinner, she would slip away and somehow make it to the tattoo shop Nick had mentioned a few times. Maybe she’d get lucky and her parents would do their usual routine of acting as if she wasn't even there, just so she wouldn't have to awkwardly crawl out of her window. Plus, that would also mean they wouldn't realize she had left. Perfect. All she had to do was make it through dinner…

Well, that wasn't currently going so well. 

Her favorite meal had been cooked for the night, though her appetite was nearly nonexistent these days. Was it the mental issues? Or the meds she downed to help fix said issues? Either way, a few bites was all she could stomach. 

“Not hungry?” Her mother spoke up first, her lips showcasing a sympathetic smile. 

Okay, seriously. What the hell had gotten into her? 

“No…not really. Sorry.” 

Marilyn shook her head in a way to silently tell Seph that it was okay, but before she could verbally respond, her father was beating her to it. 

“You need to eat,” he demanded as he eyed her from across the table. “It'll help you feel better to have decent food again.” 

Seph stared at the older man, inwardly biting her tongue to prevent herself from saying anything too rash. No need to cause an argument on her first night back. 

“I don't think I'll be feeling too great when this doesn't sit well and ends up in the toilet.” 

A heavy sigh came from her mother, who then covered the sound by taking a long swallow from her glass of wine. Ugh, she should've snuck a few sips for herself before dinner began. 

Although Seph could tell that there was something needing to be said that was right on the tip of her father’s tongue, he remained silent. The daggers he glared at her were loud enough. Before anything could be set off, she carefully slid her chair back and stood up. 

“Where are you going?” Her father sternly questioned as she walked by with her sights set on the front door. Seph snagged a set of car keys and clutched them tight within her palm, fully prepared to make a run for it if she really needed to. Hopefully it wouldn't come to that. 

“I just need some air.” 

There was a start of a protest from her parents, but she didn't linger long enough to hear whatever it was they had to say. She was already out the door and closing the distance between herself and her mom’s car. 

× × ×

It was a blessing that she knew downtown Richmond like the back of her hand or else she never would've found the tattoo shop tucked in along the congested street. There was a neon red ‘open' sign glowing in the window, but nothing beyond that really told you what the business was until you were right on top of it. Not too surprising to her that the guys would work somewhere low key. 

There was a faint jingle from the bell above the door as she entered the building, though she figured the bell was only for show because the music playing inside easily drowned it out. A girl with multiple piercings shining on her face sat behind the front desk, and the opening and closing of the door caused her to look up at who could possibly be coming in near closing time. 

“Hey…” she hesitantly spoke, though a polite smile was visible on her lips. “I'm looking for Nick.” 

Piercing girl glanced over her shoulder and leaned back in her seat a bit as if trying to see something just out of reach. 

“Do you have an appointment?” She questioned after returning to her resting position. “We aren't taking walk ins right now.” 

“Oh…no…I'm just a friend of his.” Seph almost blurted out that she wasn't even old enough to get a tattoo, though she figured that surely would've gotten her kicked out. “He told me to stop by.” 

“Seph?”

A familiar voice broke through before either of the girls could exchange any more words. She lifted her eyes to see Nick stepping through a door that led to the back, both of them sharing near identical smiles at the sight of each other. Seph slid around the counter and rushed over with quick steps, her arms immediately being thrown around his neck to embrace in a close hug. 

“Peach!” She excitedly exclaimed while her arms squeezed him so tight that she was convinced she was cutting off his ability to breathe. Never had she and Nick really even touched, yet here they were, embracing each other as people within the tattoo shop awkwardly sideyed them. 

“Your hair!” Seph gasped as she pulled back to look at him, her hands now grasping his shoulders. Nick mimicked her stance, laughing as her eyes scanned all around his face and the new tattoos he adorned. “You cut it!” 

“People tend to get haircuts every now and then,” he continued to laugh. 

“Yeah, but it's kinda all mullet-y now! I love it!” It didn't matter that he had a beanie on in the middle of the summer. She could still see those new layers. 

“If you think I look different, then just wait until you see Noah. Dude has grown at least two - shit, sorry, Pom.”

The smile she wore began to fade at his mention of Noah, her grip on his shoulders loosening. She didn't like this reaction her mind and body immediately had to his mere existence being brought up. Hopefully this glitch in her system would work itself out. 

“It's all good,” she shook her head. “I'm gonna have to face the music at some point, yeah?”

Nick gave her a sympathetic smile to accompany the gentle squeeze of her shoulder. He then nodded his head towards the door he had come from, motioning for her to follow. 

“Come on, let's get away from all this fucking noise.” 

Ushering her into the back room, Seph was greeted by what appeared to be a break area; a table with a couple of chairs, a fridge, couch, and all the other workings for people to be comfortable when working long shifts. In front of the couch there was a coffee table with different sketches strewn about it. She assumed this is what Nick had been working on. 

“I had no idea you were doing tattoo stuff,” she muttered softly while approaching the coffee table to gaze down upon the drawings. 

“You never asked.” Nick shrugged, his body bent to peer into the fridge towards the back of the room. “I mean, I never really asked things about you either, so I guess we're both assholes.” 

Seph glanced back at him, extending a sheepish smile. “Sorry. I've had a lot going on up here.” She motioned to her head before lowering down onto the couch. 

Nick was following suit not too long after, his hands holding out a bottle of water for her while the other clasped around a beer for himself. 

“Hey!” She laughed, eying the other beverage. “Not fair!” 

“What? You're not old enough to drink.” Nick chuckled while taking a swallow from the can. 

“Neither are you!” 

Although her eyes narrowed at him in a glare, she was only joking. She released a dramatic sigh, but then took the offered water and twisted the cap off. “You better be glad I shouldn’t drink with my meds.” 

After taking a couple of sips from her water, she carefully placed the bottle on the coffee table and then tugged the sketchbook into her lap. She began to slowly flip through the pages, though she hadn't even bothered to ask if she could. Oops. 

“How is…all of that going, by the way?” 

“Fine, I guess,” she gave a single shoulder shrug. “Everything is amazing and perfect.” 

Nick’s eye roll was so pronounced that she swore she heard his eyes somersaulting in his skull. He then sighed, his face telling her that he was not convinced. 

“You're full of shit,” he smiled despite the attempt at a serious conversation that she was trying to shoot down. 

Seph laughed, nodding. “Yeah, I am.” 

With a pause in her page flipping, she glanced over to him, seeing that he was staring directly at her. There was no way he was going to drop the topic. As annoying as it was, Seph was a little…touched that Nick cared enough to actually ask. Not even her parents had. 

“I don't really like them,” she honestly revealed. “They always make my brain feel like it's in a fog. I'm mega tired, nothing tastes good, and all I want to do is rot in my bed.” 

A finger then tapped the page she had been staring down at, the drawing that of some sort of creature with horns. She had no idea what it was, but she liked it. “This is cool,” she complimented with hopes to change the subject. 

Seph knew she should've known better than to even attempt it. 

“Hey,” Nick tried to gain her attention, which she eventually gave him by lifting her head and meeting his gaze. “You know you can talk to me, right? Noah, too…he’d probably sing about it all night if you did.” 

Offering a faint smile, she nodded. “I know…it's just hard talking to anyone about things, but especially Noah. Opening up has never been easy for me.” 

As easy as it would've been for her to elaborate on this, she didn't. She wasn't trying to make this a pity party for herself. Coming by to see Nick was actually supposed to be the exact opposite of that. 

Nick leaned forward a bit, his elbows resting on his knees and both hands grasping the beer can. “Talk. To. Him.” He further explained, this being his final attempt at trying to get her to do what they all knew needed to be done. 

“You'll end up regretting it if you don't.” 

× × ×

It was that conversation that landed her in the guys’ shared home the following night. Again she had left her own house without explanation; fully ignoring her parents on her way out. They seemed to be letting her do whatever for now, though she wasn't sure how much longer she would be able to push her luck. Whatever. They should just be glad she had finally ditched the sweatpants for a pair of shorts and slapped some makeup on her face for the first time in a year. It was minimal, but at least she cared enough about something to try. 

Nick had claimed it was only going to be a small get together, but the ten to fifteen people mingling around told her otherwise. No, it wasn't anywhere near the level her parties had been, but it was still a bit much for someone in her current mental state. Seph was determined to power through, though. She was desperate to return to her old self. At least in some aspects. 

“Oh my god! Sephy!” 

There was barely time to react before Alexa was rushing to her, forcing her into a tight hug that she had not been prepared for. She still smiled, choking out a soft laugh as her hands hesitantly patted the girl's back. 

“I thought I heard Nick say something about you being back! Oh my god! This is amazing! How are you?!” 

While her and Alexa had been kinda friends before this whole thing, she wouldn't have considered them to be close. They were acquaintances at best, though she was assuming things were going well between her and Folio if she was still hanging with the guys. Guess that meant she would have to stay on her good side as well. 

“I'm good! Yeah, things are going good.” Seph nodded once they had broken from the hug. She felt as if she was going to be telling this lie a lot going forward. 

Alexa gasped and held onto her arm, her eyes going wide as she looked back to the room she had just emerged from. “Have you seen Noah yet?! He's going to be so fucking stoked to see you. I know it.” 

Opening her mouth to speak, she wasn't even able to get a word out before Alexa was pulling her along to the next room. Her voice called out for Noah, repeating his name a couple of times. 

“Look who's finally back from Sweden!” Alexa gently bumped her with her shoulder as she laughed, and when she glanced over to the girl, she winked at her. Huh, okay. Was everyone just going to be in on this joke? 

“Sweden?” A guy with long dark hair that was pulled half back she didn't recognize spoke up, a bright smile taking up his face. “Hallå!”

Alexa laughed again as she reached out to his shoulder, shaking her head. 

As much as Seph wanted to figure out what that was about, she was now far too lost in the other guy that stood in front of her. Noah. Her eyes stuck to him, unable to look away, though she didn't want to. He had definitely filled out some within the last year and his hair was much longer, but it suited him. 

Also, when the hell had he gotten a neck tattoo? 

NOAH

Persephone fucking Hill. 

In his house. 

Staring up at him with awe. 

Fuck. 

What the hell was he supposed to say? Good to see you? Wow, so glad you're free? Nice tits?

Okay, definitely not the last one. That was a bad thought for him to even have. But still, nothing felt like it would be the right thing to say after how things ended. 

“Long time no see,” he then blurted out. 

Goddammit. That was lame as fuck. 

Noah could sense both Jolly and Alexa picking up on the awkward vibes because they took simultaneous swallows of their drinks and then slipped away in a nonchalant manner. 

“I probably wouldn't have even recognized you if Alexa hadn't dragged me over here.” Seph chuckled, and he knew immediately that she was just as nervous as he was. That was a bit of a relief. 

He wanted to tell her that that was okay because he would've spotted her within seconds. The words didn't leave his mouth, though. Actually, no words did. Noah continued to stare at her, both of them holding the other’s gaze. 

No, he couldn't get caught up in Seph again. It wasn't good for him. It wasn't good for her. Neither of them were what the other needed. That's what he had been telling himself for a year as he tried to get over her. Noah wished he could say that it had worked. 

“Noah…can we skip the weirdness of acting like we don't know each other? I've had a lot of time to think about how this would go, y’know, when we saw each other again, and every interaction I imagined was awkward…to say the least.” 

Seph laughed as a hand lifted to tuck her hair behind her ear, her eyes tearing from his for a brief moment. He inwardly frowned when this happened, already missing the sight of her honey colored irises. But when she didn't look back at him yet, he finally nodded and glanced around the kitchen. 

“Do you want a drink? I can fix you something.” Noah was already reaching for bottles before she could reply because of course he remembered her favorite mix: fruit punch and vodka. He found it revolting but he had a fond memory of her mouth dyed red one night when they sat in her backyard, and she was telling him some story he didn't remember all because of said red dye. 

“Sure…but hold the vodka.” She placed a hand on his wrist to stop him from untwisting the cap of the liquor, the small touch like fire on his skin. 

“I'm not really drinking at the moment.” 

It then dawned on him that Seph was probably on some medications she had been instructed not to mix alcohol with. He was tempted to tell her that it would be fine because he did it all the time, but this maybe wasn't the time. Seph was a big girl. She could make her own decisions. 

“Oh, yeah, that's cool. Just fruit punch it is then.” As he set the vodka bottle aside, he instead grabbed the juice and filled the cup half way before passing it her way. She gazed at him from over the rim while taking a sip, that sight alone making him weak in the knees. 

Get it the fuck together, Noah. 

“This is probably when I should tell you that I'm sorry…”

It seemed as if apologies at parties were starting to become their new norm. He couldn't say he was very fond of it. 

Noah took in a deep breath before swallowing from his own drink, his head shaking while lowering the cup. 

“You don't have to do that, Seph. Seriously. Ancient history.” 

He watched as she shifted awkwardly before leaning a hip into the kitchen island they stood behind. She looked basically the same, though maybe a few pounds lighter and her hair was longer, just as his was. Noah assumed the former had to do with the lack of decent food, and probably just a lack of appetite all together. He understood how it could be when starting medications. 

“I saw your text.” 

Noah froze, his mind racing to figure out what she was talking about. He then remembered the one message he had sent a couple of months ago when he had been up way too late and lost in his thoughts. It happened a lot but he usually had enough self control to not message her. That night, not so much. 

When he didn't say anything, she continued. 

“I missed you too.” 

That made him scoff, head shaking while taking another generous swallow of his drink. He looked off to the side as if interested in whatever his friends were doing, but he was actually trying to hold back his words. 

Glancing back to Seph, her brows were furrowed in confusion. 

Noah shrugged, fingers tapping against the side of his cup he held. “I need to talk to you about something.” 

With no other explanation, he placed a hand against her lower back while gently maneuvering her out of the kitchen and to the opposite side of the house where his room was. Noah could tell Seph was lost, which wasn't a shock. He wasn't exactly being very forthcoming right then. 

The door to his bedroom was quietly closed, then he was turning to look at her again. He expected her to be staring back at him, but she was actually slowly stepping around his room, studying the minimal items he had on the walls and on his desk. Clutter and knickknacks had never really been his thing. 

It was then that Noah realized this was the first time Seph had been in his room, or just where he lived in general. They were always somewhere less personal before, until the night of her party. 

“So, uh, your dad came and talked to me while you were gone.” 

He had no idea how to approach this topic, though he figured it was best to do it sooner rather than later. 

“I heard…” she murmured, her focus up on the framed images hanging on his wall. “That sounds like it was loads of fun.” 

Noah chuckled, a hand rubbing nervously at the back of his neck. “Not exactly the words I'd use.” 

“What did he want?” 

A few steps were taken so he stood at her side, his eyes down on her while hers remained elsewhere. There was an urge to reach out and touch the bare skin of her shoulder, brush her hair aside, but he resisted by shoving his free hand into his pocket. 

“He tossed out a lot of legal jargon, probably just to confuse me, but what I gathered is that he's thinking about pressing charges against Maisie. He also had a few choice words for me and our friendship.” 

Seph then looked at him, head tilted up at just the right angle for their eyes to meet. Her figure shifted and turned a bit, both of them facing each other. 

“I'm not going to let him press charges,” she exclaimed with a confidence that he hadn't been expecting. “Nothing happened in the video.” 

Was she not interested in the last bit he had tossed in? 

“He doesn't want us around each other.” 

This made her softly laugh, her eyes rolling. “Of course he doesn't.” 

“I'm not really su-”

“What do you think about that?” Seph cut him off, her eyebrow arched curiously. 

Noah stumbled over his words a bit since he hadn't really thought that in depth about it yet. He figured he needed to see how things were between them first. And now that he had…he still had no idea. 

“Do you want us to not be around each other?” She repeated her question with different wording, as if that would get an actual response out of him. 

“No…” he hesitantly replied, a slight smile appearing. 

“Then what he wants or has to say doesn't matter.” 

Again, Noah was struggling to find his words. Fuck. This was not going how he wanted it to. He was supposed to be agreeing with her dad, telling her that it was best for them to stay away from each other. But nope, he couldn't bring himself to say it. How could he when she was looking at him like that?

“I really did miss you.” 

Welp, that really cut his growing mood a bit. 

“It's actually funny that you say that since you didn't make any attempt to talk to me.” 

There was no way he could continue to bite his tongue on the matter when she just kept bringing it up…kind of. Inadvertently. 

“But you talked to Nick…how many times? Multiple times a week for nearly a year?” 

Seph bit down into her lower lip, her gaze dropping to the carpet in shame. Damn. Now he felt bad. 

No. He wouldn't let her get to him that easily. 

“I…I know it was shitty, okay? I didn't even mean to start talking to him. His Instagram was public so I was able to message him from a nurse’s account. I just wanted to check in…see how everyone was…but then talking to him helped keep my mind at ease when I really needed it.” 

Noah now did an eye roll of his own, his feet shuffling back a bit so he could place some distance between them. That sure as hell didn't explain why she hadn't talked to him. Only why she hadn't contacted him first. 

“Fuck, Noah. I was terrified to talk to you, is that what you want to hear? I didn't want to know how mad you were at me or find out what you thought about me after everything.” 

“Mad? I wasn't mad at you, Seph. I was worried! You kick me out, I don't hear from you, and then I find out from Alexa that you're gone?” 

A hand ran over his face, heavily exhaling. He definitely hadn't been prepared to have this conversation with her right then. 

“And what do you mean by what I thought of you? I always looked at you like the sun fucking shone out of your ass, so why would that have changed?” 

Seph was physically taken back by his statement. Her mouth fell open a bit, but then promptly closed. Head shaking, he could see the clench in her jaw. This told him that she was not happy. 

“No, you looked at me like I was this perfect unobtainable thing! You were just as blind to everything like my parents were because you couldn't fathom the fact that someone you saw as sunshine was falling apart bit by bit everyday!” 

It was Noah's turn to be taken back now. He stared straight at Seph, sporting a clenched jaw of his own that rivaled hers. 

“I didn't want you to think of me like that, Noah. And I know it's ass backwards and doesn't make sense. Don't want you to see me as perfect…don't want you to see me breaking down…” Seph shook her head to herself, her hands moving about as she spoke at a rather fast pace. 

“Believe me, I'm confused too.” 

“You've got to stop caring so much about what other people think. If someone judges you for breaking under pressure, then you call them an ‘asshole’ and keep it moving!” 

Seph had her eyes cast to the ceiling, her lips folded in for only a brief moment. He was waiting for her to say something - anything - that let him know she understood. 

“It's not that simple.”

Nope. Not the response he was hoping to hear. 

“But it is that simple, Seph. Why the fuck do you care about what other people have to say? Myself included.” 

“I don't…” she stammered over the two words, and Noah could tell that even she wasn't convinced. 

“Why, Seph?” He found himself taking a step closer to where she stood, his voice a little softer now than it previously had been. It hadn't been his intention to get so worked up, especially not when this was the first time they were seeing each other in what felt like forever. 

Noah could see the tears welling in her eyes. He knew that she knew why. It was only a matter of whether or not she was going to reveal this to him. He wasn't going to push her, but he was well aware of how this all needed to go. Seph needed to admit it to herself. 

“Because…I only feel worth anything when I know people like me.” 

PERSEPHONE 

And there it was. The truth Noah had been trying to tug out of her since the beginning of it all. It felt juvenile to say, admitting that people’s thoughts and opinions of her was what made her feel good about herself. Did that mean Maisie had been right about her? Was she only interested in Noah because of how he used to once look at her as if she was perfect? 

No, she wouldn't let that be true. He was worth so much more than that to her, even if she had a horrible way of showing it. 

“Fuck other people, Seph. They don't mean anything. Only the people who you feel like yourself around are the ones who matter.” 

“And what if they see parts of me they don't like? Hm? What happens then? What happens when you realize I'm just some fucked up girl who isn't worth the hassle?” 

Seph couldn't stop her voice from breaking as she laid it all out for him. If Noah wanted honesty, then that's what she would give him. And if he happened to run, well, at least she could say 'I told ya so’. 

Instead of using his words, Noah was quick to cross the remainder of the bedroom to where she stood. His large hands enveloped her face and soon he was pulling her up into a kiss that made her heart race and her breathing halt, all at the same time. She was unable to stop herself from leaning into him, eager to have as much of him pressed against her as she could. It was just like they were back in her room a year ago when she craved to truly feel him. Definitely didn't take much for that need to return full force. 

Seph didn't dare break from the kiss as her hand came up to grasp the back of his neck, her fingers briefly tangling into the long strands of his hair. She actually somehow managed to deepen the kiss even as Noah progressed forward, both of them taking in sync steps back to where his bed was. 

As soon as she was lying back against his perfectly made bed, Noah followed right behind her. She pulled him down close against her, his lithe frame settling between her legs, knees pressed firm into his hips. One hand held himself up while the other drifted beneath the shirt she wore, just to feel the warmth of her skin against his own. Seph broke from his lips for mere seconds so she could rid him of his own shirt, which Noah took as an invitation to do the same. It had definitely been one. 

“Noah…” she murmured into his mouth as they again collided in a heated kiss. As much as she didn't want to, she managed to pull back a bit, just as his fingers began to work on the button of her shorts. Though when she stopped, his hands also paused. Seph licked over her lips as she gazed up at him. She was then thankful for her flushed cheeks because that meant the blush creeping up was well hidden. 

“I've never done this before…” she admitted, despite knowing that he probably already knew this from past conversations. As well as Maisie outing her during all of that commotion. There was just a weird urge she had to properly disclose the information to him. 

Noah released her shorts, though his hands shifted to glide along her hips and up her sides in a soothing manner. “Are you sure?” 

There was a pause and then he was shaking his head, laughing in slight embarrassment at himself. “Not ‘are you sure' you haven't done this because I think you'd know if you had. But are you sure that you want to…right now…with me?” 

Of course she couldn't help but to laugh along with him, her nose scrunching at how flustered he had just made himself. Noah’s cheeks were now red with a blush and it was a sight she was hoping to always remember. 

Seph sunk her teeth into her lower lip after their laughter had died down. She didn't want to hesitate with her response because she didn't want Noah to think she was second guessing anything. Maybe the timing wasn't ideal, considering there was a get together happening on the other side of the wall, but Seph wasn't the kind of girl who needed planning and rose petals. The social construct of virginity wasn't that deep to her, not like how a lot of people made it out to be.  All that she cared about was trusting the other person and actually caring about them…much like how she cared for Noah. 

“Yes,” she finally spoke with confidence, just so Noah knew she wasn't second guessing anything that had to do with him. 

Noah then took in a deep breath, giving her a nod of his own before his head angled down and his lips trailed slowly along her neck. Oh, so now he was going to take his time? 

“Just one thing…” she breathlessly mumbled after her eyes had fluttered closed and she was doing all she could to focus on the new sensations sweeping through her. 

“Anything,” Noah continued to kiss and bite at the sensitive skin of her neck, his fingers returning to the button of her shorts that he managed to swiftly pop free. 

Seph softly laughed, her hand lifting to cradle the side of his head in a way that made him pull back just enough to gaze down at her. 

“Can you lock the door?” 

CHAPTER FOUR JUMP

× End of chapter notes!: One guess as to where my eyes started crossing because I was beyond tired but needed to get this completed at a decent stopping point. :') ANYWAYYY, not me pausing halfway through and thinking, "is this about to become a Ruffilo fic?" A story really does write itself sometimes but NO. I had to refrain. But will there more little Peach and Pom moments? Yes. ♥‿♥

If anyone can tell me what the preferred chapter length is among the masses, then that would be greaaat. Stop me from my wild ramblings. Please. Unless you guys are into it and then I guess I'll just keep on truckin'.

[bronx-bomber87]

We march forward onto ep 8 for our series rewatch. :)

1x08 Time of death

This ep is a desert for gifs in general and Chenford content sadly.

Also a very Nolan forward ep. But lots of good Tim stuff too I wanted to review. That being said, had to use screen shots with my phone since this was a gif desert haha But none the less the review carries on ha

We start with Tim seeing Isabel being brought back to station cuffs and all.... Poor Tim. Always looks the saddest when Isabel is around. He asked Grey what is going on. Finds out she made a deal to be a CI Oof. His rough ride continues when it comes to her. The man can not catch a break. But her time with him is all about to come to head one way or another which he truly he needs.

We get our first (really our only) shot of our fav duo in their shop. Lucy commends Tim for letting the drugs be found. It's good she's reminding him what he decided was for the best. You can see he is still laden with heavy guilt over it. His internal loyalty still scolding him for not doing so. He defends Isabel and tells Lucy they weren't hers. I mean no...but she did willingly stash them for Carson my love.

He so desperate to have an explanation to this situation. To why she’s acting the way she is. He’s such a black and white guy. He needs this to make sense to him. To have something to hang this on. So he goes with her being taken advantage of. It’s what going to the narrative in his head for this. What his brain is able to wrap itself around. Lucy of course thinks that is BS and does what she does best. Calls him on it. Asking him if really believes that? Sadly we don’t get an answer due to Nolan’s officer involved shooting coming up. As the ep moves on we delve deeper into Isabel's CI SL. Tim finds out the plan from Talia and is none to pleased.

Tim comes into Capt. Anderson’s office like a bat out of hell. Ready to start throwing verbal punches. I love how the Capt immediately shuts him down before he continues. She’s like future Lucy puts him in check when he needs it. Something he responds to very well. He turns into sad puppy after she reprimands his abrupt entrance and lists off why Isabel is doing this OP.

When she is listing off those reasons he looks stressed. Tim wants so badly to control this situation. Yet he is at its mercy and its killing him. He’s so worried. He tells her the Isabel in her file is gone. The emotions brewing inside him and the look in his eyes. My damn heart. Eric doing what he does best. Killing me softly with his acting.

You see the empathy in Anderson's eyes after he says this. She softens a bit. Tells him at this point all she can give him is rescue detail. Only offer on the table for him. He accepts this but looks so resigned. Tim then apologizes for barging in and leaves much more defeated than when we walked in.

We get to see him next waiting in his car for the OP to start. Tim is causing self inflicted wounds, watching old videos on his phone of him and Isabel. Clearly long before this moment in time. Living in the past as long as he can before this op begins.

Angela interrupts this trip down memory lane by showing up in his car. (And bringing fries with her LOL) None the less she is ready to go into battle with him. To be there for him. You can see it on his face how much he appreciates this. He’s never one to ask but those important to him know he when he needs it. Her talking him through the op once it pops off is what he needs. I love Lopez. She’s the best. A true loyal friend through and through for Tim.

The op goes south pretty quickly after Isabel goes off book. They rush in to find Isabel’s wire and a trail of blood... Tim loses it on Wolfe and Vestri for letting this happen. Angela has to hold him back from going after them, his worst nightmare come to life in this moment. The one thing he always feared would happen. Ugh. This is where it ends for Tim at least. It’s a TBC with Nolan's SL still hanging in balance as well.

~~~

Side Notes-Non Chenford

Cold open is pretty funny with the escape room haha they’re all high fiving then Talia remember he’s a criminal LOL it’s such a serious episode they needed this levity up front.

Wolfe saying Isabel fallen off a long way since Tim( referring to Carson once they see him). She sure has….

Thank you all for your continued likes/ comments and reblogs. They mean more to me than you know. ❤️ Will try to get 1x09 next chance I get.

[uniasus]

Um, this 'Yugi has a unknown kid' story is now at 5K. Why, my brain, why? He hasn't even met the boy yet 😭

------

Yugi sighed. They would find out eventually, and some of them probably already knew.  

Case in point, when Yugi was halfway down the stairs into the kitchen, both Duke and Joey scrambled to prostrate themselves.  

“We’re soo sorry. We already apologized for drugging you that night, and now we’re really sorry for not watching you better.” 

Over their heads, he saw Kaiba raise an eyebrow at Mai, who gleamed at the hint of a story she hadn’t heard yet. Tristan seemed surprised too, twitching as he grabbed a seat in the tight kitchen. Ryou, already munching on fries, ignored the show.  

Yugi crossed his arms. “I even recall Duke being there when I woke up.” 

“I’m sorry!” the man wailed. He picked his head up just a bit. “It did sound like you were having fun though.” 

Yugi flushed scarlet. He didn’t even remember that night, but that made everything worse.  

Solomon coughed, waiting behind Yugi on the stairs.  

Yugi let his show of anger go. He could have used a condom. The woman, whoever she was, could have insisted on one too. And as much as maybe Joey and Duke should have pulled him away from a one-night stand while high as a kite thanks to whatever they'd given him, he couldn’t have expected them to follow him into the bedroom. Their hearts had been in a good place, and he couldn’t begrudge their desire to cheer him up.