#his axis death screen lines made me laugh so hard

[akemiiya]

the vengeance route is so funny when you think about how most of it is just two edgy twelve year olds beefing with each other

[evermorehaikyuu]

Day 2

Title: The Last Goodbye

Note: This one does have mentions of death and the state of dying in it, along with a character death; proceed with caution. Not going to lie, this is probably the one I've been looking forward to writing because one scene was inspired by the umbrella academy. See you on the other side.

˜”*°•.˜”*°•.•°*”˜.•°*”˜

“Hey, what do you think happens after you die?” Y/N said, sipping on her drink, staring at her best friend since they were babies. Sugawara Koushi, the boy she could trust with her life, the boy she would do absolutely anything for if it made him continue smiling. 

“Hmm…” He looked at the sky, swans migrating overhead from their original destination, before glancing at the lake across from them. They always went there whenever either one of them was feeling stressed or they just wanted to be together. “Well, there is a legend of what happens before you head to the afterlife. Why?” He poked her cheek, grinning from ear to ear. “You’re more curious by the day about everything, aren’t you?���

Y/N reciprocated his smile and grabbed his wrist gently. “Don’t leave me like that, tell me what’s the legend.”

“Well, the legend is basically that after you die, you wait three days and then you have a few minutes before heading off. You get to go and see the person you love the most and be able to talk to them before leaving. No one’s really allowed to speak about the moments. However, no one wants to talk about it because it hurts them. Some people leave too early and it’s heart-breaking.” Sugawara sighed out of sadness for what might have happened in everyone’s last moments.

Y/N hugged him tightly, her lips turned up. “You won’t leave me alone though, right? Not even when you go out with someone?”

He laughed and embraced her. “No, I’m never leaving you alone. You’d be reckless without me.”

“Hey, at least I can cook without burning the house down!”

“Can you really though?”

“I cooked for you last time, didn’t I?” She pouted, squinting at the boy before her that was currently doubting her skills. She ran her hand through his hair and said, “But seriously. You won’t leave me right? You’ll stay with me?”

“Of course, Y/N. I’m not going anywhere. I promise.” 

~

It was a phenomenon how someone’s day could be turned upside down with only a few words. Those words could convert the happiest day of your life into one of the worst days of your life. Bad news spread faster than wildfire, faster than rumors. Pitiful looks were one of the gifts you would receive as condolences for your loss. Moving on took time.

Unless you missed something that could’ve happened but escaped your grip faster than you could blink.

Nostalgia was a powerful emotion, more powerful than anything else. It was one of the emotions that you could not suppress no matter what. Any emotion could ruin you, that was for sure, but nostalgia gripped your memories and taunted you with them right in front of you. There was nothing you could do, nowhere to go. 

Y/N was currently walking back home from school, exhausted from the day’s work. However, she stayed awake, waiting for Sugawara to arrive around 8. Yet...he was late. He was never late to one of their hangouts.

Her phone rang around 9 pm and she looked at the caller ID, Daichi’s nickname appearing on the tiny screen. Answering the call, she said pleasantly, “Hey, Daichi, what’s up? Do you know where’s Suga? He should’ve arrived an hour ago.”

“Y/N.” His voice was breathless and rising in panic, but he tried to swallow it trying not to let her know what was going on.

But Y/N was too smart for that. Her arms started going numb as she swallowed dryly. “Daichi. Where’s Sugawara.”

“He…” Daichi gulped before speaking again, his voice coming out shakily. “He’s in the hospital...he got into an accident. Something happened to him, but Y/N--” His voice cracked, on the verge of tears. “They think he’s not going to make it.”

And just like that, the world around her collapsed, her earth spinning out of its axis. The sound of her phone falling to the floor was far away as the realization that her best friend was in the hospital, on his deathbed. Her legs were numb as she sunk to the floor, Daichi’s voice far away. “Daichi. Where are you?”

“On my way to the hospital.”

Grabbing her keys and ending the call, she started sprinting out of her house, adrenaline pumping in her veins. Her lungs started screaming for air and her legs were working themselves to their limit but still, she persevered, determined to get to Sugawara on time. You won’t make it, you don’t have the will. A tiny voice in her head said, trying to state the facts.

This wasn’t a Disney movie, she knew that. However, if she was able to get there, even if he was in a coma, even if he lost his memories, if she was able to get there and see him wake up, consequences and all, she’d thank every god there was above.

The hospital was in her line of view, her breath coming out shakily as she slowed to a stop in front of the tall building. So many people died inside of its walls. If Sugawara was one of them...she’d lose everything. Everything would’ve been awful, gray and bleak without him. He was the reason she woke up in the morning, he was the reason she laughed all the time, he was the reason she believed in love. 

And yet…

And yet, somehow, she never got to tell him. 

It’s not too late, she thought as she got to the receptionist’s desk, quickly giving the woman Sugawara’s information. She tried to look at the receptionist’s face for any sign of Sugawara’s status, whether he was hanging onto his lifeline or already gone from this earth. The stink of antiseptic made everything surreal.

“Fifth floor, darling.” The woman said, nodding towards the elevators.

Y/N ignored the mechanical devices and pushed her way through a wooden door where the stairs were. Her legs could’ve groaned at the sight above her. The fifth floor was high up but it was nothing. She wanted to see him, no matter the position he was in. 

Before she knew it, she had reached the fifth floor, barreling through the halls as she tried to find her way to Suga’s door. When she found the number A-14, she tried to open the door, only to find it locked.

“Come on, come on, please, please, please…” She pleaded, her breath held in her chest as she watched the door with desperation in her eyes. One sign. That was all she needed. One sign that he was still alive. 

She paced outside of the doors, trying to get her mind out of the worst situation. What seemed like an eternity later, the door opened, a nurse walking out of the room. She stared at Y/N and asked, “Are you here to see Sugawara Koushi?”

“Yes! How is he, is he in there--” Y/N knew he was in there and she tried to crane her head to look inside.

Several weary doctors walked outside and stood next to the nurse. With a melancholy voice, she said, “He...he didn’t make it. He passed away from blunt trauma to the head at 9:14 pm.”

9:15 pm. It was as if fate was tormenting her. She had barely passed the chance to see him, to see his smile one last time. Now she never got to say goodbye. The last words she ever told him were: “I’ll see you later.” And that never happened. Her world had already started crashing around her.

She shoved her way inside, pushing past the doctors and slamming the door open. Respect for the dead was something everyone talked about, and she’d actually do it if it wasn’t the fact that her best friend was there, no life in his body.

Cautiously walking over, she expected him to open his eyes and say something, anything. But he remained lifeless. She reached out to grab his hand. Cold. Limp. 

Dead.

“No, no, no, no! You can’t die on me now!” She screamed after being silent for a minute. She gripped his hand, wishing that it could bring him back to life. “You promised me that you wouldn’t leave me alone! You promised!” She cupped his face, tears streaming down her cheeks as her hands only felt the coldness coming from him. He was gone. There was nothing she could do about it.

The dam in her broke, tears flooding through as she fell to her knees, covering her face as she sobbed. She sobbed until she couldn’t anymore and right when she stopped, she only had to see his limp hand over the bed and broke down again.

She didn’t remember heading back home. She didn’t remember getting into bed. Daichi and Asahi did that for her. But none of those memories would ever get back to her.

He was gone. 

~

It had been three days since Sugawara’s passing. Y/N could only roll out of bed, eat at least a cracker and climb back into bed. But...something was different about today.

Getting away from her bed, everything around her was hazy, yet she knew her routine. Without thinking twice about it, she started walking to the lake where, a long time ago, she had talked about death with Sugawara. She didn’t know it’d catch up to them so quickly. Not them, only him. 

The walk to the lake took longer than usual, only because she wasn’t chattering and laughing with Sugawara. She could only see the bleak darkness around her and she didn’t understand how everyone was happy. Then again, not everyone knew him.

The lake reflected the sunset, making the atmosphere around look ethereal. She stood there for a minute, her stomach twisting from the feeling of loss. It was funny how fast your life could turn upside down without a second thought. You were expected to mourn and move on as quickly as possible. How hard was it to lose someone you couldn’t say those three words to? How hard was it to lose someone who you had a chance with but never got to take it?

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

Y/N whipped her head to look in the direction from which the voice came from. Her eyes widened and her lips parted as she realized who was talking. He appeared, shimmering from the light of the sunset. Sugawara was next to her again. He turned towards her, a sad smile on his face. “Come on, smile for me. I don’t want to leave without seeing your smile one last time.”

“I-I can’t…” Y/N replied, her heart twisting as she recalled the words he once said, the legend he had spoken about. 

“Turns out the legend was true, huh?” He extended his arms, looking at them. “Well, I do look shiny, that was on my bucket list, I guess.” Sugawara gazed at Y/N with a tender expression. “Remember what I said? You only have a few minutes to see the person you loved--”

“Or could’ve loved…” The realization sunk on her, her expression changing from lamentable to fruition. 

“Guess I should’ve said something earlier. Maybe I should’ve gone to you earlier, maybe we would’ve still had time.” His voice was creeping towards shrill before taking a deep breath and staring at her with despair in his eyes. “I don’t want to go, I’m scared, Y/N.” 

“You deserve paradise. You deserve every good thing that this world could not provide for you--”

“No. I’m not scared for me. I don’t want to leave you or Daichi or Asahi or any of them alone. I don’t want to ever feel you cry, I don’t want you to be alone. I broke my promise!” 

She wished she could touch him, but it was in every book: touch the spirit and they’d fade away. Y/N had to restrain herself from reaching over to hug him, even if her heart hurt for him. “Hey...you didn’t break your promise. I’ll be okay, I promise. I know it doesn’t seem like it right now, but it will be okay. I’ll see you when it’s my time. I swear I’ll look for you so we can be together again. Just don’t panic about any of us. I’ll look after them, it’s my promise to you.” Her breath hitched in her throat as she realized he was sluggishly fading away. 

Sugawara slowly beamed at her and pursed his lips. “You promise to find me when it’s your time? I want you to take your time, to live the life I couldn’t have. Do you swear that you’ll do those two things?”

“I swear, Koushi.” Her lip was quivering, but she forced herself to look at him with a brave face. 

“Good.” He looked at himself again, noticing that he was fading slowly. “Can I ask for a favor?”

“Of course.”

“Can you hug me as I go?”

She swallowed and reached out for him, bringing him into her embrace, squeezing her eyes closed. Quiet tears came out of her as she tried to cling onto him for a longer time, hoping that her grip was enough for him to stay with her, even though she knew that that wouldn’t happen.

Sugawara held onto her as long as he could, his vision blurring with tears as everything started going black. He knew he only had seconds before he left the earth, left Y/N alone. He didn’t want to go, he didn’t want to leave her alone, but if he had to go, he wanted to leave her with something that she would remember until it was her time. Clutching onto her tightly, he swallowed and whispered before fading away completely.

“I love you.”

With those words, he was gone.

~

Taglist: @skyguy-peach​ @jovialnoise​ @versatilewindow​ @tsukiibaka​ @jaegersblogh​ @kodzuken-pie​ @sugusho​ @kara-grayson04​ @erialexerz​

[mindthekat]

For an Andreil prompt, what about, childhood friends? Or maybe just them going on a date? Oh or Andreil + social media maybe?

okay so neil’s POV is HARD and this is the garbage i came up with? pls be kind

read on a03 | 2132 words | rating: t????

                                                         ______

The thought doesn’t even cross Neil’s mind until Nicky brings it up. They’re all huddled in the girls’ room for Dan-mandated movie night - something about “team bonding” - and Andrew is in an evening session with Bee which leaves Neil at the center of attention. Aaron won choosing rights this week by betting that the freshman wouldn’t even make it through a week of practice before making a “butcher” comment at Neil, which means they’re watching another stupid superhero movie. Neil is bouncing where he’s sitting on the floor in front of the couch, glancing at the clock every five seconds. Something is exploding on screen when Nicky leans over and nudges Neil.

“What, you got a hot date with Andrew or something?”

It shouldn’t strike Neil as odd. The question. The assumption. It’s not like he doesn’t know what dating looks like for other people. He watches Matt and Dan get dressed up on off-weekends and go to dinner or a movie. Katelyn and Aaron have a standing date on Wednesday evenings after practice. But for Neil and Andrew, everything is different. It’s been months since Baltimore but Andrew still barely lets Neil out of his sight. The longest they spend apart is Andrew’s sessions with Bee or when they’re in class and even those hours are an exercise in self-control. It’s like Andrew can’t bear the thought of Neil disappearing on him again. Not after falling to his knees on shitty carpet in a shitty motel in the middle of Baltimore with Neil’s battered and bruised face tucked between his palms. Not after feeling the evidence of Neil’s stupidity and Lola’s insanity under his own fingertips. Not after waking up to Neil trembling and whimpering no, no, no in his sleep.

No, Andrew and Neil don’t do dates. They’ve traded them for promises, and stay, and yes. They trade kisses over the hood of the Maserati and unfinished cigarettes and keys to a house and a heart. Neil isn’t sure what going out to dinner or going to a movie could give him that he isn’t already getting. Because the thing is, Neil is happy for the first time in his life. He’s allowed to want things now.

“What?” He asks Nicky, confusion written all over his face. He spares another glance at the clock, counting down the minutes until Andrew is settled in beside him again, close enough to touch. Close enough to remind Neil that he’s alive and he’s allowed to have this.

“You. Andrew. Dinner and a movie?” Nicky prods, jamming his finger into Neil’s ribcage.

“We’re not..we’re not like that.” Neil stumbles over his words, trying to find the right ones on his tongue.

Before Nicky can poke and prod any further, the door swings open and Andrew makes his way in. The sight of him alone is enough for Neils heart to stutter. Andrews participation in team movie night is never a given. It’s as tentative as his consent is. A yes one day does not guarantee a yes the next day. But his sessions with Bee lately have been leaving him more unpredictable than usual. There’s days where Andrew comes back and won’t want Neil any closer than five feet away from him. There are days where he curls up into Neils space and finds contact with every inch of his body. Toes tucked under Neils thighs while they lounge on the couch. Pinky fingers wrapped around one another while Neil works on his homework and Andrew reads. Fingers wrapped in Neils overgrown curls, mouth pressed to the curve of his throat.

Today, it seems to be the latter. He shuts the door behind him and settles in on the floor next to Neil, burying his fingers in his hair almost immediately. Neil leans into the touch instinctively, without even meaning to. He tucks himself into Andrew’s side and presses a kiss to his temple, earning him a bite to his earlobe in retaliation.

“Shut up and watch the movie.”

                                                          ______

The thought doesn’t cross Neil’s mind again until a week later when Andrew is pressed against him, inch for inch. Andrew’s palms are ghosting over his sides, pressing into the curves of his ribcage and hipbones. He’s mouthing at Neils neck and driving his hips forward and Neil feels like a string pulled taut. Every point of connection between him and Andrew feels like a fire sparking.

“Where’s Kevin?” Neil breathes, squirming under Andrew’s hold on his hips.

“Fuck if I know.” Andrew sucks a fresh hickey into the base of Neil’s throat, next to where another is fading. And fuck, Neil might have a fetish for Andrew’s neck but he sure as hell has no complaints about Andrew’s attention to his.

If someone would have told him a year ago that he would have this, that he would have Andrew and the Foxes and a future, he would have laughed. A year ago there were only minutes and hours. He lived in moments between practice and class and games and lies. He couldn’t imagine weeks or even months into the future. He couldn’t dream of a moment beyond the one he was living in.

Andrew is hot and firm where he’s pressed against Neil, making it nearly impossible to focus on anything but Andrew’s breath and the scrape of teeth across his shoulder.

“Wanna blow you. Yes or no?” Andrew pushes up onto his elbows to level a stare at Neils face, searching for something in his expression. Whatever he finds there and in the breathy Yes that Neil lets out must be enough because he mouths his way down Neils bare chest. He pauses to suck another bruise into his ribcage, running his tongue along the lines of Neil’s ribs.

It’s not often that they find time to do this, take time with one another. Now that practice has started again, night practices have resumed as well. If Kevin isn’t up their asses about running drills, he’s coping with Riko’s death with the bottom of a bottle of Jack Daniels.

Andrew bites into the soft flesh of Neil’s inner thigh before tonguing at the tip of Neil’s cock. He’s been rock hard since Andrew undressed him but when Andrew swallows down, he nearly whites out at the feeling. He doesn’t last long. He never does when Andrew works him up first but i when he comes he shakes under Andrew’s hands.

“Can I-“

“Shoulders only and don’t watch.” Andrew says through gritted teeth before Neil can even finish his question.

It’s like this most often, Andrew getting himself off above Neil. There are bad days, days where Andrew kicks Neil out of the room or retreats to the bathroom to take care of his own arousal but most days it’s like this. Andrew holds himself up on one elbow while Neil runs his fingers across Andrew’s shoulders. Andrew’s other hand dips below the waistband of his sweatpants and minutes later, he’s burying his face into Neil’s neck and his entire body goes rigid above Neil.

After they’ve showered, they settle against one another in the bottom bunk, Andrew’s back to the wall and Neil tucked against Andrew’s chest.

“Andrew?” Neil asks sleepily, just on the edge of being awake.

“Unf.” Andrew grunts in response.

“Would you want to go on a date sometime?”

Andrew’s even breath against Neil’s neck is the only sound in the room for what feels like hours until Neil realizes that Andrew has fallen asleep. His hand is still wound tight in the fabric of Neil’s shirt but the small puffs of breath in Neil’s ear is distinctly even, the only evidence that Andrew is capable of relaxing.

                                                         ______

It’s after Andrew’s next session that Andrew drops onto the couch where Neil is knee deep in calculus homework. He drops two tickets into Neil’s lap and twirls an unlit cigarette between his fingers.

“Friday after practice. I heard you like that shitty band that Matt always plays.” Andrew says unceremoniously, like he hasn’t just dropped two concert tickets into Neil’s lap. To anyone else, concert tickets might not mean much but Neil knows just how much Andrew is giving him with these two small strips of cardstock. It’s more than just acknowledging that he heard Neil’s question between warm sheets and Andrew’s breath against his neck. It’s acknowledging that he cares about what Neil wants, acknowledging that whatever this is between them is something he cares enough about to indulge Neil’s fantasy of normalcy.

“You heard me.” Neil says, eyes shining and jaw slightly agape.

“Of course I did. You never shut up.” Andrew says, though the quirk of the corner of his mouth betrays his smugness at knowing he’s the one to make Neil look like this.

“Andrew..” Neil says, still unbelieving. He stares at Andrew, as if he will disappear if he looks away.

“Stop looking at me like that or I’ll take Kevin.” Andrew replies, the small tilt of his lips saying otherwise.

Neil leans down to where Andrew is trying his best to scowl at him, slowly enough that Andrew could pull away if he needs to, and presses a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Thank you.” He whispers.

If they spend the next thirty minutes making out on the couch, Neil’s calculus homework forgotten, well that’s nobody’s business.

                                                         ______

Andrew’s fingers grip Neil tightly as they weave through the crowd. The concert is standing room only and Neil already offered to stand at the back of the club so Andrew can press his back against the wall instead of leaving it to strangers. A few tables litter the edges of the standing room but they’re all full and Andrew is pulling Neil through the crowd until they’re close enough to the stage where Neil can see above the heads bobbing in front of them.

“If we’re going to go to a concert you may as well be able to see.” Andrew explains, as if he hasn’t turned the world on its axis with the amount of concessions he’s made for Neil in one week alone.

The evening is an exercise in growth and trust for them both. Andrew stands rigid through the opening act, though he does allow Neil to stand at his back with his hands on his waist. They’re not pressed close together but allowing Neil to touch him outside his direct line of vision is a first.

By the time the main act crosses the stage, Andrew is leaning into Neil’s touch. Whether it’s exhaustion from the week or just giving Neil another permission, Neil isn’t sure but he hooks his chin over Andrew’s shoulder and crosses his arms over Andrew’s stomach. “We don’t have to stay long.” Neil says, instead of I’m here and I see you.

“Shut up.” Andrew says despite curling into Neil’s lithe body. And Neil presses small kisses wherever he can reach: the side of Andrew’s neck, his cheek, the shell of his ear. The music is familiar, some songs Matt has played in the changing room after practice or during team dinners. Neil isn’t familiar with the lyrics by any means but between the sway of bodies around him and the heat of Andrew’s body, the lyrics strike him harder than music usually does.

'Cause somebody hurt me

Somebody hurt me

But I'm staying alive

And I can tell

When you get nervous

You think being yourself means being unworthy

And it's hard to love with a heart that's hurting

“Yes or no Andrew?”

Andrew is turning around in his grip before the question leaves Neil’s mouth, his hands finding Neil’s hair and tugging until Neil’s mouth is sliding against his. For a moment the crowd melts away and it’s just the two of them wrapped up in each other, pressed together at the chest and at the hips. Neil never takes Andrew for granted and anytime he has Andrew’s lips sliding against his, he is acutely aware of how lucky he is but getting to hold Andrew tight against him in a crowd of people is something else entirely. It’s stupid that he should feel possesive after everything they’ve been through. Andrew has shown him in more than words that he chooses Neil but there’s something that unfurls in his chest at knowing that Andrew is his.

“Idiot.” Andrew mumbles when they pull away for a moment, as if he can read Neil’s mind.

Their surroundings come back to them in pieces. They’re hardly aware of the song ending as they push through the crowd to make it out of the club. Neil reaches over the center console of Maserati in silent request. Andrew takes his hand wordlessly as he rolls his eyes.

“It’s just a hand.” He says.

“Its your hand.”