#his Again yknow? not worth the effort this is nice enough as-is
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got carried away with a sketch and now i dont feel like finishing it properly <3
#ull look at this and say 'tf u mean its done???' and i say Lies. those are sketch lines and color blocks that i unfortunately started shadin#by the time i was adding subsurface scattering i realized it was too late. i run out of energy very quickly so im not gonna essentially do t#his Again yknow? not worth the effort this is nice enough as-is#unrelated to the pic but i finished book 6 tn and sobbed for 30 mins straight and idias horrors are so uncomfortably similar to me Help#god......i need to call my lil sister tomorrow. twst is ruining my life. why r all the ones i say 'just like me fr' so fucking awful and lam#idia?? leona?? azul????? throwing myself into the sun so i will dissolve and ignore this. at least i get deuce as well. hes my parttime son#oh wait this aint abt them this is abt sil seb. they got married when they were 4/5 seb proposed with a flower tied as a ring#ty for coming to my ted talk#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#silver vanrouge#<3#sebek zigvolt#silsebe#suntails
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p-post a ... a preview mayhaps
we're not at the smut part but here's this
cw;; fem!reader, eren and armin are fucking weird, dark content sorta 18+
“Explain yourself or I’m ubering home.”
Armin laughs again, scratching his chin. It terrifies you, just slightly - how someone so aware and so.. whatever he is can look so angelic. So lighthearted.
“It’s not anything to explain, really. Me and ‘ren just like the same things. We have since we were kids so whenever we want something, we.. work together to get it? Watching R-rated movies, getting toys, etc.,”
There is no way this is going where you think it is.
“It’s the first time it’s been over a person, that’s all.”
Holy shit.
“A-are you talking about me?”
This makes Eren burst out into laughter. A full blown laugh, enough to make him put his drink down. Armin looks over at him with a smile.
“No fucking shit.”
“Be nice to her, Eren. She was scared of us, yknow?”
You really, really don’t know how to feel. An overwhelming mix of emotions is making you feel like you might pass-out. Your hand goes up to your forehead, your eyes clenching shut as you try and understand the implications. There’s more to this, you know that now. There’s always more, and your gut hasn’t failed you at all.
“So what then? You want to.. fuck me, I guess. But why me? And why were you two acting so.. fucking weird about it?”
“We didn’t mean to scare you, you just happened to catch on. To me and ‘min. How we act around Mikasa, all of it. We just wanted to test how much you knew.”
“And we like to make sure if something we want is worth the effort. If you couldn’t figure out what wavelength Eren and I are on, it would’ve been a waste.”
You don’t miss the want. The implication of keep. Your mind feels heavy.
“...What do you mean by want?”
Armin grins a little.
“You’re really clever, yknow? I can see why you’re here on scholarship.”
Eren takes a sip of his drink, taking a deep breath.
“We don’t do the whole fuck and leave thing. We wanna keep you.”
“Like date me?”
"Sure. If you wanna call it that."
#dark content cw#return to sender#GOD THEYRE FUCKING WEIRD!!!!!#fic previews#im losing my mind#ask to tag
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idk man I just really like your style of rambling about them ig? like I find peoples' enthusiasm for things very sweet and infectious sometimes and your emetkoto posts defs hit that spot for me? like your joy and love for them seeps through and infects me too it's great. emetkoto good. anyway tell us about after vauthry. do it. give us the deets.
well thank you very much, it makes me happy to hear that ive had that effect on you 🥺🥺🥺 thats exactly what i hope to do with my posts about them but i do have bad demon brain so sometimes im like hmm. 'am i just being unbearably annoying instead actually???' and ofc sometimes its 'oh this is not original at all nobody wants to read this' so its always nice to have a little reassurance like this ghsljgsfd….
cracks my fingers so hard they all break anyway now for that essay you asked for
RIGHT SO LIKE right before vauthry, literally the night before that fight is when emet selch takes k'oto to the tempest to marry him and seubsequently erase his memory of it to "keep things fair" or whatever (basically he still had tiny little pangs of doubt about how things would turn out bc of yknow the whole being tempered for 12k+ years situation and he wanted to make sure that if it like. came to them having to fight. k'oto wouldnt hesitate bc he had smth like that holding him back :,) little did he know that he tried to hesitate in the end anyway and was only stopped from sparing him by ardbert) but thats a whole like other thing i still have to finish writing the worlds longest stupidest hardest to read post about so im physically restraining myself from going on about this anymore right this moment as much as i want to repeat myself forever about it bc GOD. God. god.
but anyway he was full of love and hope for k'oto, so much hope that he would be able to hold the light and prove mankinds worth so he could lay his mission to rest and stay by his side (and undo the spell holding his memories of the wedding) he was so SO ready for it and then. it just. all came crashing down :,) he'd allowed himself to let his guard down and put his duty aside and have hope in humanity again one last time and fall in love and k'oto just couldnt do it! even with his subtle help holding the light back he couldnt handle it, he was still too weak at 7 rejoinings and that shit hurted bad!!! he succumbed to the tempering and grief and rage and disappointment and closed himself off again…from there its probably the more canon adjacent bit of their story, graha tia acting embarassment, back to the tempest (altho k'oto doesnt remember having been there once before AUGH), amaurot, dying gasp :,)
throughout it all k'oto is trying desperately to get him to listen to him again but emet selch keeps cutting him off and ignoring him which hurts A LOT and ofc he says some. mean things to try and get him to just leave it be and accept what has to be done and stop talking about it bc HE didnt wanna think about it anymore EITHER obviously here but k'oto doesnt give up he keeps trying all the way to the very end….he never planned to kill emet selch, he just wanted to weaken him enough that he would take a moment to stop and think and listen , a last ditch effort to fix things but ardbert (and everyone else really) saw that it was like. too late for that. there was no way in hell emet selch was hearing reason anymore and if k'oto let him live there was a pretty high chance he would just kill him when he tried to get close to him so he took control of his body and made sure that axe killed, oops! way to kill a dudes soulmate and then be absorbed into his soul so you can never actually apologize for it…when the dust settled and k'oto realized what had happened he. was. A MESS!!
the only thing stopping him from breaking down right away was emet selch shushing him like 'let me enjoy this last moment with you in peace and quiet'……remember us and all that (although 'us' had a very obvious double meaning here
anyway tldr; WEHHHHHHH,,,,,,,
sorry for unreadability i very much wrote it exactly as it came out of my brain which is a long run on thought with no consideration for line or paragraph breaks. i tried to turn it into a few chunks for you
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Hunted for Sport
Now to do a complete 180 from my Mammon fic, here is predator/prey Lucifer! this is suuuuuper self indulgent bc i was looking for stuff to read, but nothing was really scratchin the itch yknow? so i wrote this at like 5am
Warnings: NSFW, DUB-CON
Pairing: Lucifer x GN!MC
Words: 2339
Tags: Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Gender-Neutral Main Character (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Dubious Consent, Implied Consent, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Aftercare, Primal, Predator/Prey, Blood Kink, Blood Drinking, S&M, Injury, Fear Play, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Rimming, Biting, Kissing, Dark, Rough Sex, Not Beta Read, Sleepy Cuddles, Bubble Bath, Edgeplay, Smut, Possessive Sex
Summary: Please make sure to read the tags before reading! Hunted and fucked in the forest by Lucifer, followed by fluffy aftercare because he has class
Note: Like my last one, this is also on my ao3 which is linked in my bio!
Fear. It was all you could feel as you ran through the forest outside the House of Lamentation. Your chest heaved and your lungs were already starting to burn. ��How long has it been?’ You managed to think, had it been hours? Or merely minutes? The pain in your ankle pulled you from your thoughts as you crashed to the ground. You curled into yourself as coughs wracked your body, the wind having been knocked out. Your ankle throbbed and you could feel dull stinging from almost every inch of exposed skin, scratches from the foliage marring your skin.
That's when you heard him. His sonorous voice filled your ears as he sang, your brain too foggy to make out the words. The sound grew as his almost casual steps grew closer. ‘Gotta run, gotta escape’ You repeated the thought in your head as you struggled in the underbrush, sucking in a breath as you forced yourself to your feet. You kept moving forward, after all, what else could you do? Give in? No. No matter how nice it might seem to just give in, to surrender and finally be at rest you couldn’t keep yourself from limping on. The pain in your ankle was getting unbearable, aggravated by your desperate attempt at survival. Your vision was getting hazy, and your blood was rushing in your ears, and yet, you could still hear him sing. It was like he was all around you, his voice swirling around and pressing into you.
“Y/n.” Directly behind you. You whip yourself around and hiss, not a good idea as your ankle screams. “Look at you,” Lucifer regarded you, “how pitiful.” Tears were streaming down your face as you backed away slightly. Lucifer matched your movements, keeping the short distance between the two of you the same. You were hyperventilating, your heart was racing, your eyes flicked about quickly, looking for a weakness, a chance to escape, anything. Alas, no such opportunity provided itself, as he quickly closed the gap and grabbed your chin with a gloved hand, forcing you to look directly into his eyes. Hunger, amusement, and arousal swirled in his crimson eyes as he gave you a much too gentle smile. Lucifer leaned forward, his lips brushing against your ear. “You’re not even worth my effort.” His voice was essentially a growl, low and sharp sounding in your ear. “Why don’t you keep running?”
Before you even had the chance to register his words, you were on the forest floor once again. Lucifer had pushed you there. You stared up at him for what felt like forever, he was standing over you, his hands casually resting in his front pockets. “What are you waiting for? Run.” You snapped back to reality. He was letting you go? That didn’t seem right, but you weren't about to wait around and question it. You once again clambered to your feet and took flight, ducking under branches and barreling through bushes. He had started singing again. How far could you go? How much farther would you need to go? Your mind raced as you free your shirt that had caught on a branch. It didn’t matter, you would keep going, you would make it. ‘Dear god let me make it.’ But no god could hear you.
You realized this as you ran headfirst into Lucifer, he wrapped an arm tightly around your waist and clasped a hand around one of your wrists. He was in his demon form at this point, sharp horns protruding from his hair, soft wings fluttering against his back. His grip was tight, like he was trying to squeeze the life from you just like this. “Tsk tsk little lamb, running right into the waiting arms of the one chasing you? I had expected better.” You struggled weakly, your body beginning to give up. Every muscle in your body was weary, unable to do anything against the demon that hadn’t even broken a sweat. He buried his face in your neck with a deep laugh. “You know you can’t go on, don’t you lamb?” He took a deep breath in, filling his lungs with your scent. “Just give into me.” His breath was somehow cold against your flushed skin, and your knees gave in, causing you to slump in his grip. Another laugh rumbled his chest, this time much more wicked. “Wonderful.”
You suddenly felt a sharp pain in your neck, your tired brain taking a few moments to realize Lucifer had bitten into you. A choked whimper escaped your lips. Blood trickled down from where his mouth still sat, the metallic taste filling his mouth, causing him to let out a moan. It was a shallow bite, not something you could bleed out from. He greedily lapped and sucked at your neck as the bleeding began to slow. His hand released your wrist, opting to instead explore your thigh, hips, and ass. He squeezed hard on your ass, earning another whimper from you. He swiftly turned you around and pushed you to the ground, your knees, chest, and face all making contact with the hard ground. Lucifer pressed himself against you, grinding slightly against you as he growled in your ear, “You. Are. Mine.” His words filled your mind, repeating over and over.”
You felt his weight pull off of you, before he ripped what was left of your top off, leaving you cold and shivering. Lucifer pulled his gloves off, and threw them to the side. He raked his claws down your back, small crimson beads forming along the bright burning scratched he left behind. His hands reached the waistband of your bottoms, and he swiftly rid you of them along with your underwear. He let out a deep growl as he kneaded your ass, staring hungrily down at your fully exposed body. Suddenly, you could feel his mouth on your ass, his tongue skillfully swirling and prodding the tight hole. He tongued your ass with vigor, claws digging into your ass cheeks as his grip tightened. Small moans began to fall from your mouth, just loud enough that he could hear them. He pulled back much to your.. Disappointment? Surely, you couldn’t be disappointed that he had stopped rimming you.
You heard the pop of a lid, followed by a cold, wet finger rubbing against your ass. Had he brought lube? Huh. Lucifer began to press his finger into you, easily slipping the whole finger in. He wiggled the finger inside you for a moment, before he began to push a second finger into you. This finger was met with slight resistance, taking a tiny bit longer to fit inside you. Once both fingers were full inside, he began to scissor them, opening and stretching you out. He pushed them in and out as well, curling his fingers as he went. Your legs were shaking, and your sex was dripping from the stimulation. He hummed as he added a third finger, really making sure to prepare you for what was next.
Just as you felt you could take no more, Lucifer pulled his fingers from you. You whined and your ass was gaping slightly from the loss of his fingers. “Oh?” his voice was filled with amusement. “Could it be that you’re wanting this?” He chuckled, which was shortly followed by the sound of a zipper. His thick cock rubbed between your ass cheeks, he drizzled more lube across the top of his cock as the bottom got coated by what was already on your ass. “I can’t wait any longer.” You felt the head of his cock press against your ass, and quickly pop in, eliciting a moan from you, and a deep groan from him. He pressed deeper, stretching and filling you more than you could’ve imagined.
As he bottomed out, he placed a hand against your back, and his other hand on your hip. “F-fuck,” he swore as he pulled back slowly, before quickly snapping his hips foreward. He began to set a pace, not very fast, but his thrusts were rough, pushing you forward each time. His claws dug into your skin as he quickened, letting his moans and groans fall freely. His hand shifted from your hip to your sex, long fingers moving defltly and driving you insane. You were close and he could tell. “Are you going to cum?” he panted out. “What a filthy slut, going to cum out here in the woods.” His fingers and thrusts pushed you over the edge, and you let out a strangled moan that was on the verge of sounding like a scream. As your orgasm wracked your body, causing you to shake all over, you tightened on Lucifer's cock, basically sucking him in.
Lucifer did not let up, his fingers continued working your sex, his thrusts remained as quick and rough as they had been. The sensation was overwhelming, your vision was spotty and it was all you could do to manage to breath. He followed close behind you, groaning as he released his cum deep into your ass. His thrusts continued though, slightly more erratic, but not slowing down. “You really think im -mng- finished with you?” He leaned over your back and kissed at your neck. “As if.” He pulled out of you momentarily, and flipped you onto your back. He swiftly reinserted himself and leaned over you. He rested on his forearms, framing your head as he caught your mouth in his. He thrust slowly now, grinding himself into you as he messily kissed you. You weakly wrapped your arms around his neck, and kissed back. “Mmhh, what a sweet little lamb you are,” he purred between kisses.
He kept going like this, slowly fucking you, almost passionately. Alternating between kissing your mouth, cheeks, neck, ears, anywhere he could reach. It was almost as if you were making love in his bed at home, the way he treated you now. You could feel yourself grow closer to orgasm again, and you clamped down on his cock. He smiled against your skin upon feeling this. “Close again, little lamb?” his voice was still rough in your ears, but there was a small hint of sweetness to it. “I’m close too.” You tangled a hand into his hair at those words, running your nails against his scalp and tugging gently. He shifted his weight to support himself with one arm, and slid a hand between the two of you to rub against your sex once more.
His thrusts quicked slightly as his orgasm built, and he gently moaned your name in your ear. “I want you to cum with me lamb, fuck I’m so close.” You weakly moaned his name in response, your voice thick in your throat. He suddenly thrust hard into you, and filled you once more with his cum. The warm feeling combined with his fingers pushed you over for the second time, you continually moaned out his name as you rode out your orgasm. Your breaths began to slow as he brought his hand up to your mouth. You opened your mouth and cleaned yourself from his hand. He caressed your cheek with his now cleaned hand. “Such a good lamb for me.”
He pulled himself from you, zipping his softening cock back into his pants. He helped you sit up and kissed you sweetly, before wrapping you up in his coat and picking you up. “Let’s get you home, hm?” He whispered as you settled into his arms, head resting on his chest. You nodded and closed your eyes as the two of you walked in a warm silence to the House of Lamentation. Before you knew it, you had reached his room. He gently set you on his bed. “I’ll run a bath.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead, before retreating to his private bathroom. You sighed happily, cuddling into his coat and breathing in his scent. It wasn’t long before sweet floral scents began wafting from the bathroom. Lucifer emerged from the bathroom with a first aid kit. “Time to clean up lamb.” You begrudgingly shed his coat, moving as he instructed to give him better access to the various scrapes, cuts, and bite marks. He whispered praise as he cleaned you up with an antiseptic, peppering in plenty of ‘I love you’s.
He gets to your ankle and you winced. You really managed to do a number on that one. He had used a small amount of magic on the larger of the cuts, but he used more on your ankle. The swelling immediately reduced, and the pain lessened and dulled. “Thank you love,” you managed to croak, your voice not quite ready to be used much. He kissed your nose.
“Of course, now, I think the bath is ready.” With that, he picked you up once more, carrying you into the bathroom and helping you into the warm bubble bath he had prepared. He quickly shed his own clothes, and slipped in the tub behind you, wrapping his arms around you. You lean back into him, resting your head against his shoulder. The two of you stay like this, holding each other as he hummed gently. As you felt the water start to cool, you took turns washing the other, gently cleaning off your skin, and massaging your hair. Once you were both clean, Lucifer helped you out of the tub, wrapping a fluffy towel around your shoulders. He drained the tub as you worked on toweling off, he followed suit once he was finished with the tub.
Now dry, Lucifer returned to tending to your wounds. Applying ointments and bandages, then gently wrapping your ankle. He let out a yawn, and laughed lightly at himself. “Time for bed it seems.” You nodded, giving a yawn yourself. You shimmy under the covers, Lucifer laid himself next to you and wrapped his arms around you. “Good night lamb, sweet dreams.” He kissed you once more, before you both drifted off to sleep.
#obey me#shall we date obey me#lucifer#obey me lucifer#luci#lucifer x mc#lucifer x reader#smut#obey me smut#obey me fanfic#obey me one shot#fluff#angst#dubcon#blood#aftercare#predator prey#adrians writing
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Could I request Kid and Killer with an S/O that never celebrates her birthday so they surprise her with a party and she starts crying because she never expected it. No body celebrated it before so she never bothered with it
These turned out kinda long oops
He didn’t celebrate your birthday in the beginning only because he doesn’t really pay attention to birthdays and never realized you had never celebrated it- he didn’t even know when your birthday was
Tbh he doesn’t really celebrate birthdays either, he just uses it as an excuse for more drinking and partying than usual
So he doesn’t really know how to celebrate a birthday
At first he wanted to just take the crew out to the bar for your birthday “party”
But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that you deserved more
So he would ask Killer for any info on how birthday parties are supposed to be celebrated, but Killer really doesn’t know either
So he used the little knowledge of it that he actually knows: cake and gifts
He doesn’t like sweets and obviously he doesn’t know how to make them, but thankfully Killer has some sort of idea on the recipe because there’s actually a recipe book or two in the ship’s kitchen
So he’ll make the cake per Kid’s demand, and Kid tries to think of what to get you
He loves spoiling you in general yknow- for example from the treasure they get/steal he gives you rings, bracelets, jewels, etc.
But he wanted to get you something special because it’s a special occasion, even he thinks that, and clothes+jewelry are normal things for him to get you
So he actually decided to try making something for you, which was a little metal heart shaped with an intricate design of overlapping shards of metal- he was embarrassed to say the least, thinking you wouldn’t like it
The whole time planning, he was keeping a close eye on you making sure you didn’t stumble upon anything or hear anything- while he was also keeping an eye on the crew making sure they didn’t say anything, he had Killer’s help on this too
Eventually the day arrives and he has the crew set up everything on the deck while you’re napping. Then he goes down to get you and trails closely behind you while you make your way up onto the deck
He’s standing behind you with a wide smirk watching you jump as the crew shouted “SURPRISE”, he pulled it off *proud sigh*
But when you turn to him with tears rolling down your cheeks he thinks he messed up or scared you
“Oi ______ stop crying!”
“Is something wrong?!”
���Do you not like it?!”
He holds your shoulders while you try to explain why your crying through your tears, and once. he understands he scolds you for making him worry
While you’re partying with the rest of the crew, Kid is sat over on the side thinking how special this must have been to make you cry and he’s happy that he put so much effort into it because he definitely feels like it was worth it
It makes him extremely happy and proud that he was able to offer you something that you had never experienced before- but accompanying these feelings there was also the anger towards the people who never bothered to celebrate the day you were created because without that day he wouldn’t have you
When the party was over and you were with Kid in his room, he was sitting on the bed looking deep in concentration. He had been wondering if giving you the metal heart was a good idea, you had gotten a lot of other gifts from the crew- but he wanted you to know how hard he worked for you, how much he would do for you
So he called you over and pulled your into his lap before attaching his lips to yours. Devouring you with more passion that roughness, which was quite unusual for him. He parted breathlessly, taking a moment to stare into your eyes, then he ever so slightly held out his hand, directly in front of him against his stomach. If he hadn’t glanced down at the object, you wouldn’t have noticed it
The heart glittered in the dim light of the room, but Kid’s eyes were fixated on the sparkle in your own, the way you softly smiled as you turned the object over in your hands, and the arrival of tears once again wetting your cheeks
“Oi, you’ve already cried once today you baby” Depsite his rude words, his voice was soft and gentle. Kid wore a prominent blush and a stutter, yet a serious face as he promised to show you the love you never recieved as a child, telling you that you deserve the world and more. And he would be the one to give it to you
Okay but “Murder Machine” just makes him even more attractive
Tbh he also didn’t take other crewmates’ birthdays very seriously, because all they ever did for the occasion was drink and party more
Killer had realized the crew never celebrated your birthday, no one really asked for your birthday the day you joined so no one knew when the date was
The only reason Killer didn’t ask himself was because he didn’t know if it was a touchy subject or if there was a specific reason you never said anything, and the last thing he wanted was to make you uncomfortable
However, when you were drunk one time you had spilled the date of your birthday and Killer had written it down- luckily you didn’t remember telling him so he could plan a surprise party
He had a small idea of how a birthday was supposed to be celebrated- cakes, gifts, friends, just the basics
Buuut, Kid wasn’t onboard with Killer’s plan. He doesn’t like birthday parties, or cake- sweets in general. Kid’s refusal to help Killer with the party angered him as well as slightly insulted him. But he refused to give up because he wanted you to enjoy your birthday, it’s a special day
Killer’s birthday isn’t important to him, but your birthday will be
He decided he would just celebrate alone with you- that means no Kid, no craziness, and it’s more intimate. He really just wanted to spend time with you, so he’s hoping you won’t mind it being just the two of you. He also wanted to make sure you wouldn’t be overwhelmed by the sudden celebration which you had never experienced before
At least Kid was nice enough to let Killer have the kitchen to himself on the date
The hardest part was trying to decide what gift to get you; it had to be something you like, and something meaningful. Maybe something that would remind you of him?
The week before your birthday, when he was still planning this, he had gone off by himself on the island you docked at- so he could look for a gift from one of the village’s shops
Eventually after about and hour of searching, finding something, deciding it wasn’t good enough or you wouldn’t like it, then putting it back, Killer found a teddy bear. Fluffy fur that was about the same color as his hair, he thought you would like it because you always compliment his hair and run your fingers through it
He was proud of the gift at first, but he kept doubting if you would like it or not
He managed to keep the little celebration a seceret, which was particularly easy because the crew didn’t have a problem with him wanting to celebrate alone with you- the only problem was Kid kept threatening to tell you
So when the day finally arrived, Killer was totally nervous, On the outside he looked perfectly calm, nothing out of the ordinary. But inside he was a wreck, doubting everything he planned
The cake came out fine, so did the icing. It was a simple one layer cake frosted with [y/f/c] icing. He places little flowers he had picked up on the last island, around the kitchen. and and and.... candles- he had a few little candles placed around the kitchen that provided a dim light
He placed the cake on the counter, accompanied by two plates and the correct utensils of course- and he kept the bear hidden in a cabinet so he could pull it out later
He went to get you from your room quite late, once everyone else was in their beds. He wanted it to be as quiet as possible and this was unfortunately the only way to have that. You didn’t know about this surprise from Killer because you had just assumed this day would be. like every other year, so you you had gone to sleep
Killer had to wake you up which made him feel kind of guilty, but he thought you looked adorable while he lead you down the hall to the kitchen
He had you step in before him and leaned over your shoulder to whisper a soft “happy birthday _____” He awaited your reaction to the cake and decorations he had placed so excitedly, but when he did not recieve one he got worried
“_______?” He whispered your name and you turned around with tears streaming down your face, it was a heartbreaking sigh in crontrast to your soft smile
“______? What’s wrong? Do you not like it? You can go if you want, you don’t have to stay” Killer whisper shouted. You threw yourself against his chest and wrapped your arms around his torso while explaining through sobs that you just didn’t expect it because no one ever celebrated your birthday
Killer smiled widely behind his mask at your reaction, yes of course he hated seeing you cry but at least they were happy tears
For a minute his smile faltered, suddenly realizing how hard it must have been on you to not grow up with a single birthday or party celebrating your birth, because hell even Kid “celebrated the crew’s birthdays. He felt a pang of anger towards those who had most likely made you feel sad on the past birthday days by not doing anything to give you the day you deserved
He led you over to the counter where you jumped up and sat with him to eat the cake
It was silent while you ate, of course you spared a few glances at Killer to see him enjoy food without his mask on. After about 2/3 of the cake was gone and you gazed lovingly up at Killer ignoring his confused and flustered face, he reached down to open the cabinet and get the bear out
He placed it in your hands hesitatingly and waited. He watched you look at the bear for a quick second before you broke into a huge smile and told him you love it
He smiles softly and pulled you into him to hold you
“It’s fur reminds me of you” You giggled as you noticed the similarity between the bear’s fur and your boyfriend’s
“I was hoping you’d say that”
#one piece#one piece headcanons#eustass kid#eustass kid headcanons#killer#one piece killer#killer headcanons
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Why would Loki believe what Mobius tells or shows him? Frigga's death-film could be faked, Loki's responsibility for it might false, saying he always fails and causes death etc. ... where's the proof? Yes, the segments were selected to manipulate his emotions and align him with the TVA, and there's self-loathing, but he's also supposed to be smart and familiar with how lies work. Maybe he's playing along to escape and do what every Loki who ever existed and created a variant did: what he wants.
[please blacklist spoiler tags: #loki tv series spoilers, #loki series spoilers, #loki spoilers]
Well, here's the thing.
(under the cut for spoilers + length)
Objectively, I agree with you - that is, I fully recognize and agree with the characterization of Loki being intelligent and also manipulative (and therefore more than familiar with the art of lying), and I agree that it would be really, really hard to manipulate Loki without him realizing what you're doing and figuring out how to counter it and manipulate you in return (and you won't figure it out as quickly).
However. I don't think Loki is impossible to manipulate, or that his intelligence and innate capacity to lie (often and well) mean that he's immune to falling prey to someone else's schemes, when those schemes are rooted in/relying on all of the rawest vulnerabilities that Loki, as a person, possesses.
Loki's tragic flaw (or one of them, in my opinion) is that his emotions can and often do get the better of him because they are the result of how thoroughly and bone-deeply he hates himself. In Thor 2011, for example, Loki's initial plan evolves from trying to delay Thor's coronation into trying to simultaneously destroy Asgard's greatest enemy (and, presumably, destroy the monster within himself) and trying to prove his worth as a prince and a son to Odin. Were his plan to succeed, the only thing he would ultimately gain is validation that he has equal value to Thor. (Certainly he knows that Odin will wake up and Thor will eventually return; like, there are no long-term goals for keeping the throne here.)
Point being, everything he's orchestrating becomes motivated by emotion over logic and, ultimately, he doesn't really lose so much as he gives up because Odin rejects his plan - and, therefore, rejects Loki - and it hurts him so badly that he attempts to kill himself. He literally can't live with the pain it causes him.
So, I mean, we already know that Loki is deeply emotional and immensely insecure. We know that he's felt inferior and out of place his entire life, only to have those feelings validated by the revelation of his being Jotun and the rejection of his effort to prove himself as worthy as Thor.
We also know that a literally suicidal Loki ended up going through an extremely traumatic experience with Thanos and, furthermore, he has now failed pretty majorly in "taking over" Earth. Loki's in bad mental shape and, I mean, there's his proof right there that Mobius is right and that he always fails and causes death. He failed in Thor 2011 (and caused death). He failed in Avengers (and caused death). He believes himself to be worthless, deserving of rejection; he is emotionally unstable and has untapped reservoirs of pain under the surface.
He is, in other words, in an absolutely ideal place to be manipulated by Mobius. He doesn't seem to believe what Mobius tells or shows him at first - asking where Frigga is being kept, not believing the events that haven't happened to him yet, arguing back against every point Mobius makes, etc. But, as the scene wears on, you can tell he's becoming less and less sure that it's a falsity and more and more uncomfortable and upset because Mobius is unrelentingly digging at everything Loki's ever feared about himself.
That's the state Loki's in when Mobius selectively shows him the most painful scenes from his future.
Not to diagnose Loki, bc I am not qualified to do so, but to project a little bit - as an emotionally unstable person myself, who has struggled with mental health for as long as I can remember, I can very easily see how Loki would believe Mobius at that point.
It's like, imagine that you have all of these fears about yourself and they color the lens through which you view the world. I mean, Loki's experiences have definitely contributed to his poor self worth, and his family and culture have fucked him up - no imagined slights here - but when you hate yourself enough, it can alter how you perceive every little thing.
You may blame yourself a little harder for things that aren't your fault. You may too quickly assume that someone else thinks the worst of you when they may not think anything in particular about you at all. You may feel completely and utterly alone and hopeless about that ever changing because why would anyone want ever want to love someone as worthless as you?
Now imagine you've done some really bad things and, deep down, you feel guilty about them. You didn't enjoy doing them, but you did enjoy how powerful they made you feel, and that makes you a bad person, too. You weren't even wanted as a baby, for fuck's sake; you were literally abandoned for no discernable reason besides possibly being a runt, aka being born wrong.
These are all things you feel, and then here comes this person who is showing you events that have happened that he shouldn't know about, he's telling you information about yourself that he shouldn't have, he's showing you that he's got the resources to figure you and your life out and then he tells you to your face - while showing you even more failure and death in your future - oh hey, everything that you fear and everything that you feel? Yeah, that's all valid. You are irredeemable. You are responsible for death and destruction. You are unwanted, both by your family and by existence itself. You're only here so that others can have someone to stand on while they climb to the top. You killed your own mother because you're so selfish and vengeful! God, how do you even live with yourself, you destructive waste of space?
I mean, again, call me biased and paint me as projecting my mental illnesses on Loki but if it were me, no amount of intelligence or experience with lies would be enough to not believe every single word Mobius said about me (and about the situation).
It's certainly possible that Loki is playing along to escape; I mean, we know that he does eventually escape, though whether he gets captured again or not remains to be seen. But I think that, at the conclusion of the episode, Loki has just been broken down enough by everything he went through that day (it was a really rough day for Loki) that he's like, yknow what, just - okay, fine, tell me what I have to do bc I'm all outta options here.
(Actually, to be completely honest, I think there's both going on - Loki is resigned to being stuck with the TVA but also he probably recognizes that, at some point, he's going to get the opportunity to escape and might as well play nice until it comes along.)
So, yeah - I completely buy how that scene went down in regards to Loki believing Mobius.
#thank you for the ask!#asks#charlotte replies#loki tv series spoilers#loki series spoilers#loki spoilers#loki pokey artichokey#i will never be over loki#mobius dick#tw mental health#tw suicide attempt mention#tw suicidal ideation#tw depression#tw gaslighting#tw psychological abuse
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Bleach Canon Vs. Studio Clown Episode 1
Intro to the series
WARNING: Long read but theres plenty of pictures
The first deviation we’re greeted with is what the anime presents as the arrival of hollows into the human world. With a likely artistic rendition of them forming from the shadows of Hueco Mundo and dripping/bleeding over into the human world like splotches of ink, after which they disappear - unable to be perceived by humans.
A/N: Which, kubos to the anime, is rather neat.
The anime also decided to incorporate the first volume poem which is the thematic beginning and a great establisher of the mood/themes of Bleach, which roughly translates to:
我らは 姿無きが故に それを畏れ
“We fear that which cannot be seen”
And then they curiously add a line to this poem?
姿無き故に敬う
”We revere that which cannot be seen"
A/N: Which, initially seems on brand with the spiritualism of that “which is not seen” - the shinigami, DEATH itself if you will. However, unlike the themes of “fear” and “fear of death/the unseen”, “reverence” is not really a theme prevalent or definitive for bleach. Reverence is not particularly reserved for death or death gods, but antagonists with themes of divinity/the Soul King himself, but I digress.
Next off the bully scene has a couple of missing/reworded lines, as well as some of the delivery changed, but overall it’s not significant enough to mention.
I also wish they’d kept Ichigo’s shit yourself scary face from this moment right here, since it really underlines how serious and personally invested Ichigo is in bringing small justice to the souls of the departed, but I can only pray a future remake does include it.
^ I am disappointed in y’all :/
vs.
v Karma delivery, bitch
Then for some reason the next scene is changed significantly:
In the manga, it builds up slowly to Ichigo’s reveal of supernatural abilities with the iconic TM character profile intros (which I can see why weren’t recreated in the anime, but I sure wish they put them in....)
with him spooking the bullies off with the ghost girl right behind him
Versus his scary face doing the job instead.....
It’s a small change, and I can see why it would be opted for - we don’t really know if they even saw the ghost in the first place (then again you could argue that would spook them anyway). There is a tonal difference in the long run though. The manga emphasizes once again *why* ichigo is scolding them in the first place - he sees the people disrespected by them knocking down the vase, he wants them to acknowledge their actions *because* in his mind, there are real victims he knows from it. While in the anime, since the ghost is not yet introduced, it feels more like “you are disrespectful to the dead” in a more generalized way vs. him actually being acquainted with the dead and treating them like the living.
(Again, not sure why change it so much at all........the suspense and reveal are in the manga just the same.... but ok)
As well as cutting off this small moment where you can see Ichigo’s very human (and cute!) interactions with the ghosts. To him they’re just as real as the living, and he lends them a hand whenever they ask for help.
Also lmfao this 4kids level of censorship.....
It goes on rather faithfully for a while, no significant omissions, then Pierrot decides to randomly replace Yuzu’s lines with Karin??
Manga:
Anime:
Which is an odd choice, given that not only does Yuzu sense ghosts just fine (albeit at a much lesser level than her family) and that later comes into play with Fishbone & Grandfisher, but Karin literally later admits that she doesn’t even want to acknowledge their presence, so why the change....?
They also cut short Karin’s little talk about Ichigo’s stats, which is a fair change for screentime’s sake, but mentioned for the record.
There’s a bit of a divergence with Yuzu lore, when the manga explicitly states she sees them, but not “clearly”, the anime focuses on her barely sensing them. I guess it doesn’t matter that much in the long run, since she is not that prevalent in the story, but it’s here for the record nonetheless.
Anime:
vs.
Manga:A
Also this next bit was removed, probably for the sake of pacing (which, totally fair!!), but it’s funny and I love the Kurosaki family so here it is:
It does make the flow a bit better in the manga, since this talk of selling his talents distracts Ichigo and creates an opening for his father to strike, in the anime, the same is done with Ichigo just randomly saying
and thats where his father attacks him, which isnt really an issue, just kind of funny of how the manga is like:
Ichigo’s distracted by his sisters plotting to sell him out and hence Isshin has his chance to strike back
vs the anime being like:
Ichigo randomly thinks about dinner mid convo about ghosts and thats what distracts him from play-fighting with his dad
gfdkhlgfdg okayyyy....moving on
In the manga this scene is interspliced with Ichigo’s inner monologue about the nature of his powers (with hip jargon like “for real” courtesy of Viz )
(but my beef with Viz translations are for another day)
Also the line about “He told me more ghosts than ever have been haunting me” has been given to Karin for some reason, probably to make her feel more included in the scene/Ichigos life.
Notably, Isshin’s response is changed from “What?! He talks about stuff like that with you (Yuzu, singular)” to “What?! He talks about stuff like that with you guys?” as well, again probably to include Karin more into the dialogue. (Mmmm ok....)
Minor detail, but Karin’s lines has been changed to more “boyish” speech structure in the Japanese dub, which may seem insignificant, but ...... that is for later.
.....
This little exchange
is replaced with:
Which, seems innocuous adaptation differences, but Yuzu’s lines keep decreasing and it’s a short enough moment to like....include and establish how motherly Yuzu is acting towards Ichigo.....but ok...huh.
And now we get into the big boy changes.
So, probably for the sake of grounding the supernatural element of the series, the anime decided to skip time to the next morning and introduce the hollow attacks with a news report.
Which.....is an interesting choice. I am assuming this is addressing how the real world perceives the hollow attacks, which Bleach doesn’t put too much effort into addressing, but very soon after this we learn about stuff like memory replacement and other various technology to keep things under wraps so this is either redundant or implying that shinigamis have not been doing their job, which hm......
Next off is the bizarre choice to paint Isshin out of the picture for the night
Not sure why, but ok
Again, where’s the shinigami with their Kikanshinki (memory replacement devices)??? Pierrot where’s the lore coherence......
Anyway, Ichigo goes to replace the girl’s vase, but suprise-surprise she’s gone-zo. Wonder what happened to her.....
(And....again, people vehemently don’t want a reboot when the anime looks like this? )
So Ichigo hears a scream and a hollow scream and follows the sound (Ok?).
Totally random hollows attack. Which Ichigo somehow has never seen so far? Mind you, this isn’t like in the manga, where Fishbone was sent by Aizen specifically after Ichigo to make him aware of it. These are random-ass hollows attacking people, so how come Ichigo suddenly sees them. Ya coulda played it safe Pierrot, and stuck to the book, but we got plot inconsistencies episode one so let’s party.
The girl is, of course, not eaten and they run away.
She trips at the most inconvenient moment. (can ghosts trip? Ghost don’t even have legs in japanese lore and Kubo draws them floating around so okkkkkkkk)
(ok ok, im just being petty, bUT YKNOW)
(convenient tripping on deadass levelled ground is convenient)
(also God I really want that bag Ichigo’s got on his shoulder, it looks so nice)
Random-ass hollow closes in and
BOOM
Rukia
(Now, if the rest of Bleach and the manga didn’t exist I would like this moment. We get a glimpse into Rukia’s abilities, into shinigami as a concept and we don’t really get to see her slice and dice hollows that much overall so the moment itself is rad in isolation.
Now, unfortunately for Pierrot’s screenwriters, Bleach manga exists and so does it’s lore, which again, would not be inconsistent with each other if the adapation was faithful. Now, Ichigo sees a shinigami, for some reason, for the first time in his 15 years of life. All of a sudden.
You could argue, that much like in the manga, this is all part of Aizen’s plan TM, but like, she literally leaves right after leaving Ichigo gaping in awe ghfkjgdf. Why’d Aizen give him an appetizer, I really don’t understand how this change is benefitting the narrative in any way. It’s ....dare I say....generic.)
Rukia yeets the hollow
(why is this kid suddenly not wearing shoes?)
and goes off on her merry way, leaving Ichigo shooketh
ALSO RUKIA MA’AM THERES A FUCKING STRAY GHOST RIGHT AT YOUR RIGHT????? ISNT IT YOUR LIKE....JOB.......... TO HELP GHOSTS MOVE ON??? i know killing hollows is the fun part, but like ghjkfdlgfd ??? are you gonna ignore her???
( his fucking face ghfjdkgdlfgfd)
So after this wholeass pointless detour (you’ll see why it’s pointless in a moment) we timeskip again (the filler is strong in this one. These 6 minutes were worth not coming up with something cohesive and removing scenes that actually make sense ah yes)
Ichigo is in deep thought TM about who tf is the stranger he’d just seen. Likely mulling over the monsters and how this person was able to slay said monsters. Probably thinking how unusual they are.
and as if on cue
the stranger makes their presence once more
(my God these faces gfhgkldfg)
....
Now let’s briefly address what happens in the manga instead.
Instead of the whole timeskip scene with the fight, Ichigo simply returns to his room on the same day, and oddly enough recognizes the species of the butterfly he sees? (nerdy boi! nerdy!! boi!)
rukia arrives much the same
(With the little text emphasizing how he’d never been aware of soul reapers, which is unsurprising given their secrecy, and makes sense in the long run since their first meeting is specifically orchestrated by Aizen. Two species that werent meant to interact brought together by his schemes.)
Back to the anime:
Ichigo pauses to ponder who tf they are and why the fuck they’re there.
and then the anime has the gall to suddenly revert to sticking to the manga, which like.... Ichigo kicks her for no reason? I guess because she isn’t answering? Even though Ichigo knows she has a sword and can wield it? Reckless boy.
Manga Ichigo thinks she’s a burglar, therefore, unsurprisingly, is comfortable kicking her outta his house. It’s a silly moment, but it also shows how accustomed or stupidly brave he is with the supernatural.
In the anime Ichigo asks her who she is instead of all that, and she responds pretty similarly to the manga
AND THE NEXT SCENE IS WHERE IT CLICKS WHY THEY WENT OUT OF THEIR WAY TO REMOVE ISSHIN FROM THE HOUSE.
(Ichigo and Rukia addressing the pointless filler, this leads nowhere)
Rukia check him out like she’s checking if the oranges on sale dont have mold on them
slapstick ensues
and Rukia decides to answer his question.
Vs. the manga in which Isshin doesn’t leave his children home alone for some random conference and is actually used very efficient for two reasons:
1) building up on the burglar gag with actually funny slapstick that is based on a previously established joke
2) Instead of Rukia just saying “oh usually people can’t see me”, we get an actual demonstration of it, the reader gets to see “oh Isshin can’t see her - she must be a spiritual entity,” which further clicks with her surprised reaction at him being able to kick her in the first place.
The next scene is the classique Pierrot censorship.
Ghost girl runs away from what I’m assuming is Fishbone.
Aside from not showing her get eaten, the scene is pretty much delivering the same message,
bUT
BECAUSE OF THE STUPID ASS FILLER WITH THEM MEETING RUKIA BEFORE THIS, I CAN ACCUSE RUKIA OF NEGLIGENCE.
UNLIKE THE MANGA, where Rukia arrives the night before and is specifically seeking Fishbone, therefore having no time to help this girl pass away,
This vvvvvvv
could have been prevented if SOMEONE DID THEIR FUCKING JOB THE DAY BEFORE VVVVVVV
(I rest my case. Thank you Pierrot for making Rukia either negligent or an idiot. Awesome, And mind you, these changes were unnecessary. The manga’s pacing is fine. They could’ve extended scenes. But nope, had to go for making them meet beforehand.)
Anyway, we get to see some actual stakes in the manga
The next scene which is this in the manga
has two changes to it. Firstly, obviously Isshin being consoled by Yuzu isn’t included since he isn’t home in the anime, and even if he were, I can see why that would be removed, cute as it may be.
And secondly, due to them having met prior Ichigo asks two additional questions:
And Rukia nods at both, which means she acknowledges that she had seen the girl the hollow was after and yet did nothing to help her pass on.
(Reminder the Bleach anime was in production WAAAAY past the first 4 volumes, which gave a good general idea of the series, which y’know, was fine to adapt as is.
You’ll see these changes add up into becoming inconsistent with further Bleach lore. There’s a reason people call Bleach a hot mess, and I’m afraid Kubo ain’t really it.)
(Volume 14 Note from Kubo where he talks about the anime being announced)
Back to the series
Pet peeve time: Wish the anime was half as expressive as the manga
These scenes are supposed to represent
This panel:
(Nitpicking? Perhaps, but idc)
So uh, this scene is odd
Again, because of the addition of that filler with the hollow
Ichigo has seen her in action
And they even added Rukia trying to convince him
even though, yknow???
LITerally the previous day???
Anyway in the manga, where Ichigo has reason to be distrustful of her and her claims since y’know hes never seen her or a shinigami in action, but has enough proof that she’s a ghost bc his dad didn’t see her, he simply dismisses her before she can reply, and instead of just getting angry for being called a pipsqueak
she shows both Ichigo and the audience proof of her spiritual powers by binding Ichigo and forcing him to quietly listen to her explanations.
(To reiterate - Anime Rukia has to verbally try to convince Ichigo WHO SAW HER FIGHT A HOLLOW THE OTHER DAY that shes no ordinary ghost. And because of that, she has no other reason to use Sai on him other than that shes mad she was called a pipsqueak bc she just tried to verbally convince him shei is a shinigami. When they could just adapt the manga and have her both demonstrate her powers and put him in his place at the same time. Wild.)
Also CRIMINALLY BORING SHOT, WITH CRIMINALLY BORING RUKIA
#NotMyRukia
LOOK AT THE MANGA
LOOK AT HER SMUGLY OWNING ICHIGO’S IGNORANT ASS #FuckYeahRukia
Also the subs may not show it if you’re watching it on Netflix, but anime Rukia says “I am not allowed to lay my hands on humans outside orders,” which like, you ARE LITERALLY DOING THAT. Manga Rukia is fine with bullying Ichigo, but she draws a line at killing him, but man Anime Rukia, you give no fucks about the laws huh.
why so cheerful?
(also Rukia be right tho)
(specifcally compared to hell you could say Soul society is a resftul place lmfao)
Also anime salary man gets to rest in peace, even like, pray and shit
Meanwhile the manga
YEET TO SOUL SOCIETY
(also notice how we’ve been robbed of ichigo’s silly socks
I swear the anime knows how to suck the soul out of the manga
Get it? Soul! haha ....moving on.)
Really Rukia? One of your jobs?
GUESS YOU WERE OFF DUTY HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(I’M SORRY BUT LIKE, SEE HOW POINTLESS THIS FILLER IS UGH!!!)
(Again pet peeve but look at how ugly this screen is COMPARED TO THE MANGA)
(What have they done to you, queen)
(also they never mention the name Konso ( or as Viz calls it here -”soul funeral”, thanks Viz)
Next on, not a pet peeve, but an observation:
Anime Rukia keeps her sketchbook in her kimono
Manga Rukia keeps it at the titty
Yep, which you neglected to do the day before,
she literally says “With the konso I did just a moment ago” like she used the word before. Like you can contextually get it, but why cut that line out of the dialogue if you don’t change the next line it’s referenced in?
There’s also a dialogue change from the manga’s well, Viz uses “vaporize” which is not a bad choice given the specific wording Kubo uses, but the original says
昇華 • 滅却
sublimate/convert • extinguish
which is a clever little nod/foreshadowing to the nature of souls in bleach and that they can be “converted” in and out of a hollowfied state.
While the anime just says “to slay hollows”, and albeit it lacks the little nod the manga has to offer, I can’t see how they’d include it in the anime at that stage so I’m fine with them simplifying it to like, an exorcism.
A better question then Rukia - WHY DIDN’T YOU SEND OFF HER SOUL????
also WAIT THE GIRL IS STILL ALIVE?? she’s dead-dead by this point in the manga.
BULLSHIT !!! YOU LITERALLY EXPLAIN LATER WHY!! ACTUALLY YOU EXPLAINED EARLIER WHY!!! YOU LITERALLY SAID THIS, 1 MINUTE AGO :
Anyway, Fishbone almost grants her the priviledge of escaping this God-awful anime, but is suddenly stopped?
AND CAN TALK??
wait WHY DOES FISHBONE TALK?? GHFJD isnt this supposed to be a juicy reveal for later when Ichigo realizes “hey theyre not actual complete monsters - but used to be humans!” Hm, ok.
Also leaves her alone? Damn ok...
Reminder:
Moooving on...
Speaking of the manga, this little moment is missing:
Since there is no pointless filler that would make him ask about the ghost girl therefore exposing Rukia’s slacking off of her duty, Ichigo realizes that there must be a hollow nearby bc in the manga he actually has braincells to spare.
Also wiping off the Baron’s moustache moment is gone 😢
Missing and dearly missed is also this moment, which consolidates how protective Ichigo is of his family. He only needs to hear Yuzu scream to click that the hollow is nearby and his family is in danger. I feel like anime Ichigo should be even more worried since his sisters are alone but ok??
Also foreshadows their dynamic of Rukia trying to stop his reckless attempts at pushing himself to protect his family, bc yknow....she has her own Kaien trauma to process.
Next off....
This is .... a choice....
They were very eager to give Yuzu’s lines to Karin just a couple of moments ago but now this whole exchange:
Where we see a very pragmatic yet soft side of Karin
She doesn’t know what is happening, and doesn’t expect her brother to fight it - he just wants him to be safe, because she loves her family. At least warn him before it gets to him and hurts him.
is replaced with this:
Yuzu, sweetie, what do you think he can do to achieve that.
I guess at least Anime Ichigo tries to get Rukia to do her job as she looks down on Yuzu in silence.
But compare it to the manga:
#MyRukia stops by Karin to check for a pulse and reassures Ichigo that his sister is alive.
Manga Ichigo is NUMBER ONE oniichan in town and doesnt have time to call out to a stranger to save his family - HES BEYOND READY TO GO FIGHT, RECKLESS AS IT IS, EVEN THOUGH HIS OWN FAMILY BEGS HIM TO JUST RUN. because he cant let himself be unable to protect them. He cant live with himself if he doesnt try his darnest to protect them.
*elevator music playing as ichigo tries to get rukia’s attention but she fucks off downstairs, but instead of doing shit he just does the worm on the floor*
which I guess is more realistic for a teenage boy, but Ichigo is literally traumatized by being unable to protect a family member. Y’all think a ghost he’s never seen before is gonna stop him?
Yooo, pathetic. #NotMyIchigo
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Studying Days
Summary: Flora pages through her book, jotting down ideas for what enchantment to show off on her final test, when someone knocks at her door.
Why are they trying so hard to get good grades anyway?
Flora sat in the room she shared with Bloom alone, her friend having gone out to a cafe with Stella. Laid open on her lap was a book on enchantments which she paged through, humming as she found particularly useful ones to demonstrate for her exam. Imbuing objects with permanent magic was the culmination of all they’d been learning in their enchantment class this year, and the amount of her grade that relied on this assignment reflected that.
It was honestly good fortune that Bloom had gone out. Love her friend as she did, Flora could still admit that Bloom’s ability to sit down and study was lacking. She wouldn’t have been able to get much work done if she had spent most of it tutoring Bloom and getting the girl to focus.
Flora had just completed the third chapter when someone knocked on the door. The tapping was too light to be Bloom, so it must’ve been one of the fellow Winx (excluding Stella, who had the unfortunate tendency to barge into rooms out of excitement). Flora closed the book, slipping a twig through to mark the pages, and called out, “Come in!”
Flora excellently hid her surprise when Musa entered the room, a bag thrown across her shoulder. It was rare for Musa to seek out her companionship, perhaps she thought Bloom had already returned?
“Hey, so,” Musa rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, sending Flora a crooked smile (and damn if that didn’t make her heart melt). “Tecna’s being kinda loud right now, yknow, destroying Timmy at video games again, and you and I normally get similar grades so…” Musa held out her book bag. “Wanna study together?”
Now that Musa mentioned it, she and Flora did normally receive the highest grades among the Winx (and among most of the students, Flora was allowed to brag a little), a fact that was just so slightly out of place with their normal personas that even Flora forgot it occasionally herself. Flora’s eyes quickly darted up and down Musa’s figure, thoughts whirring through her head.
Then, without much fanfare, Flora shrugged and gave Musa a small smile. “Sure, why not?”
Perhaps Musa would make for Flora’s first good study partner.
An hour later, they were both sitting on the floor with books fanning out around them. Musa’s recorder sat in the center, with Flora taking down observation notes as Musa attempted to enchant it.
It had taken them a while to decide on what to do. Musa was apparently a practical learner, and Flora couldn’t deny that she also liked that method. Musa’s instruments made for very simple things to enchant, and they had decided that playing it should make it rain.
It would be a very clear sign that the magic had worked correctly, and, if they managed to pull it off, be very impressive for the exam.
Unfortunately, neither had managed to successfully do so yet.
“Can’t we just go murder Stormy and put her essence into the flute?” Musa complained.
Flora tapped her chin. “Well, I don’t think we would manage to do so properly if we still are having trouble with enchanting an object. Tying an essence to it would be much more complicated magic, and we should wait until we have the proper skills to do so.”
Musa hummed and tipped her head in forced agreement, but not without adding, “I’d be really motivated to make the magic work though.”
Flora laughed, covering her mouth with a hand. She had to admit, the idea of getting back at the Trix would be very good motivation. But she just responded with, “I guess we’ll just have to rely on the prospect of a good grade to keep us going.”
“Sometimes it doesn’t seem that worth it.”
At this Flora sat down more comfortably, leaning her chin into her palm as she looked over at Musa. They had already been studying for a while, so Flora supposed one conversation break was deserved. “And why’s that?”
Musa was already waving away her previous comment. “I suppose I don’t mean it that much, I really like learning new things and that’s all the motivation I need. Guess I just wish my dad would be a bit more excited about me doing well in school. He’s nice about it and all but like, his support feels weird sometimes.”
Flora hummed comfortingly. She had found her friends, just like Miele, liked the soft songs she knew by heart. Besides, what was there for her to say? Musa didn’t seem to want a retort, or unconditional support, so Flora would just be a vine on the wall, listening for now.
“I wanna be a musician, yknow? But my dad really hates that idea, so whenever I get good grades he’s happy, but happy in the way where he thinks I’m giving up on my dream and doing something he’d prefer. Just, sucks because I like school and I like doing well.”
At some point during her speech, Musa had flopped onto the floor, her head resting near Flora’s crossed legs. With deft fingertips, Flora undid the tight pigtails Musa’s hair normally was held in, and began running her fingers through the black strands.
“Musa, I’m sure your father will come around to you being a musician someday, and if he doesn’t want to, I’ll go to each of your concerts to cheer you on.” Flora probably would’ve gone anyway, Musa’s music truly was beautiful, and it was always nice to hear the rare pieces she’d share with the group. And if Flora didn’t go, one of the other Winx (Tecna) most certainly would.
Musa giggled and swatted Flora’s hand away playfully. “Don’t say that, concerts take up a lot of time, especially if I ever get good enough to go on tour. You wouldn’t want to follow me to like, 20 different stops.”
Flora had never considered that. She mulled over the information, and then discarded it. “I would get Stella to teleport me.”
Musa rolled her eyes, obviously having to concede the point. “So why do you try so hard to do well in school?”
“This is trying hard to you?” Flora asked dryly, gesturing around at the state of their life. To be honest, this was probably Flora’s worst academic year of her life. She was far too busy dealing with the Trix to focus on school as much as she’d like.
Besides Flora had never studied overly much anyway, it was more in her ability to focus.
“You know what I mean!”
Flora chuckled, and leaned back for a few moments. An answer didn’t immediately bloom on the tip of her tongue, it wasn’t something she had thought of much. School was simply something you were supposed to be good at, for no other reason than to be good at it. And Flora certainly had never found it very hard to be good at academics.
“I suppose I want to be at school to help me later in life, for a good career, but I think I may just like being good at it,” Flora shrugged, her last words making Musa cackle. “If I can be good at school, is that not enough of a reason to be?”
“I mean, it does mean you can hold your report card over Stella.”
“I’d never tease one of my friends like that. Stella does put in some effort to be good at school, and I’d never discourage her in that way.” Flora clutched a hand to her chest.
“Well, you certainly do consistently uphold your reputation of being the nicest person in all of Alfea,” Musa smirked.
Flora blinked down at her, a facade of innocence masking her face. “I have no idea what you mean.”
Musa snorted, “Sure you don’t. Now come on, let’s get back to work.”
There were many reasons Flora tried so hard at Alfea. Sometimes it was to be a good role model for her little sister, sometimes to defeat the evil forces that kept bothering them. But more commonly, it was for little things, like the look of hilariously overdramatic betrayal Bloom shot her when Musa dragged Flora out of the room, saying that “It’s time for the A honor roll girls to do some actual studying.”
#winx club#fanfic#fanfiction#winx#flora#musa#flora and musa bonding!!!!#they bond over being a+ students#yall should see the amount of headcanons i have about floras academics#studying days
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OKAY COOL I WAS ON THE FENCE ABOUT POSTING MY OWN EXPERIENCES IN THE KFAM DISCORD BECAUSE A POST ABOUT People Being Mean To Sage Specifically SEEMED KIND OF MASTURBATORY OR SELF-PITYING OR WHATEVER BUT IF WE REALLY ARE GOING TO STILL BE OUT HERE PUSHING THE This Server Is A Lovely Familial Community And Dissenters Are The Problem NARRATIVE EVEN NOW? HELL NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT.
obviously this is hard to be objective about. this stuff is a lot less concrete than my first post, a lot more based on vibes i got, which, yknow, is why it’s not in my first post. but if anyone identifies with this, if anyone sees their own experiences in this discord reflected in mine, then it’s going to be worth the worry i’m reading too much into things, or others thinking the same of me. if i can help anyone who felt like THEY were mistreated there and weren’t sure if they were reading too much into things, then. it’s worth it. especially since the M.O. in there was ‘everything’s fine and if not we’re going to MAKE IT FINE by silencing anyone who disagrees’.
a lot of talk has been done about the censorship (word used loosely, first amendment protects from the government not from the mods etc, definitely a specific suppression of dissenting ideas though) the mods have been doing--once more i suggest @kfam-tea for receipts and screenshots. not something i feel great about, but not something i have personal experience with, so i won't speak to it. see also my first post about my interactions with the creators. it touches on the dogpiling, which i'll go into more depth on in this post. you can find it [link: here].
so. the first thing in the official discord that tipped me off about the hivemind samethink phenomenon is that the whole place is distinctly frosty on the subject of samben. that’s a post all its own, one that follows through to numbers on ao3 and whatever, but i’m not here to make a ship manifesto. suffice it to say i got attached to the ship upon listening, inhaled the (suspiciously small) ao3 tag, and was stopped in my tracks at the discord server where any implication of such ship inclinations were met with silence and pointed changes of subject.
distinctly weird. distinctly unusual fandom behavior, that i couldnt even hint around shipping the two men whose incredibly profound relationship is literally the crux of the show, who have exchanged ‘i love you’s, one of whom is confirmed gay--all other romantic entanglements aside, because when have those stopped shippers? that was weird. i realize that's maybe a bit tinfoil hat of me. it could have been the goldfish-bowl big-brother-is-watching vibe from having creators in there, except, as i said, it carries to other sites.
anyway, much more concrete was when i spoke out about my thoughts on ben’s actions in ep68. again, enough there for another post, so tl;dr: he was doing his best, he’s a good guy and a good friend, but his actions DIRECTLY outed sammy to the WHOLE town, without allowing sammy to say the words himself. it was an accident, yes, but it had tangible, harmful consequences, and even accidental harm warrants apology. it should at least be... acknowledged. at some point. by the show OR the fandom. it's a disservice to ben himself to never get the chance to own up to it.
this was an unacceptable take. i tried breaching this topic and making my case twice, and got THOROUGHLY dogpiled both times. a dozen fans crawled out of the woodwork to argue heatedly, sometimes getting quite aggressive, sometimes toeing the line of outright hostility toward me personally. definitely some downright rude messages. not once did anybody speak up to defend my right to put forward my dissenting opinion, let alone SUPPORT my argument, god forbid. ben’s were the actions of a good friend, i was told. outing someone to their whole town without giving them the chance to say it on their own terms didn't qualify as harm at all, i was told, on account of ben's heart being in the right place.
still, the opinions being argued matter less than the attitudes and behaviors. people don't have to agree with me about that ep, i don't care. i do care about being given the right to, as a single person on my own, have space to make an argument without being shouted down by a dozen people. i do care about how it fit into a greater pattern of forbidding any criticism of the show, and ben in particular, who is a good friend and therefore all of his actions are good and harmless, who is our resident heterosexual unassailable paragon of purity. which might explain the samben problem--sammy/ron[/jack] was perfectly fine, even popular, but there was never a whisper of shipping ben with anyone but emily. they're Official. theyre The Perfect Couple. don't you dare challenge that (and for the most part, i didn’t dare. i quickly learned not to).
my [link: previous post] details kyle's response to these fun events, where he specifically went out of the way to follow me being shouted into silence (a result of me being driven to literal tears and shutting down rather than invite more argument) with a warm congratulations to everybody for their conduct in this discussion. because that's the kind of conversation kyle wants to specifically and explicitly praise and encourage, i guess.
anyway. this contributed to the growing sense over my time in the discord that people held a certain distaste for me but didn’t want to say anything direct. instead they talked around me, ignored me, immediately changed the subject from my messages, the whole while bestowing constant glowing compliments on each other and endlessly repeating saccharine sentiments about what a nice family type community they were, how grateful they were for the discord being such a positive space. i suppose that’s an easy impression to get when negativity is ruthlessly suppressed (and apparently outright censored nowadays) and instead of insults or, god forbid, communication with people with whom folks might take issue, they just (more or less) silently stonewall and cold shoulder them.
again, i could be misreading cues, being egocentric or tinfoil hat by reading this pattern into how i in particular was treated. either way, the fact that i was given the fandom friday shout out the week after KFAM live was definitely... strange. fishy, even. i was already mostly out the door at that point, had been for weeks--it was actually in my last few days speaking there period. i felt strangely guilty that they would dedicate a day to me when i didn’t like being there much and hardly spoke any longer. one thing’s for sure: my congratulations were fewer and more impersonal, perfunctory, and/or generic than other fans got (i kept a screenshot). i still have no idea what to make of that one, but there you have it.
p.s.: since vagues are in vogue now apparently, i might as well mention the person who's been accused of being A Problem In The Discord For A While Now, among nastier things, which definitely is not an effort to justify kyle's passive aggressive response to their untagged post which used the phrase 'death of the author', or kyle subsequently crying on twitter about death threats because apparently he couldn't be bothered to google a basic literary analysis term and thought if he was vague enough nobody would look into what was actually said. i guess he was right, if the hundreds of asspats and outcries against The Evils Of Podcast Fan Meanies were any indication.
i digress. i just wanted to testify that the fan in question was one of maybe three or four people on the server who consistently treated me nicely and acted like they liked me. and that another fan who claimed to be uncomfortable around death-of-the-author-person was the person who came the closest to being outright nasty to me when i expressed a critical opinion. make of that what you will i guess!
p.p.s.: if i never say anything more about this whole thing or the creators’ part in it, i do want to say for the record: noah james is fully exempt from all of this and remains absolutely wonderful and a whole treasure. like dont pedestalize male creators and assume them incapable of wrongdoing etc etc but i had an hour long midnight denny’s breakfast sitting across from him and he was nothing short of an angel the whole time. sweetest guy i’ve ever met. he hasn’t breathed a word about any of this drama. he may not even know it’s going on because he’s too busy being the most beautiful and talented man in america or something. i love you noah
#sage speaks#sage original post#kfam#king falls am#kfam drama#kfam critical#kfam negative#kfam hate#long post#kfam tea#ok to reblog
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i sent these to puck also but. 17 33 53 67 78 for both stupids
>:) Time For Idiots. again i kinda went off hard so this shit under a read more
17. Do they have a best friend? If so, who, and what makes them their best friend?
pen’s best friend growing up from when he was Baybey till he left the palace was mikolai! they were best friends kind of because like. they were rlly close in age and were both born in the palace and were both Boys Who Needed A Buddy Bc They Were Stuck In This Like Very Formal Place All The Time And Wanted To Be Silly Kids. so kind of best buddies by necessity. he was the graf’s son. he was the court jester’s son. can i make it any more obvious etc etc. he was also very much one of those kids who was like My Mom Is My Best Friend <3 also
but now that he’s out of the palace the party r very much his best friends. like. They’ve Seen Him Die. hes fucked up over and over again and they still accept him n believe in him, and hes not used to things being that like... unconditional, u know. if he had to pick one person in arsonparty it Wld be miss telltale but like. he kind of views her as like That One Really Cool Older Sibling Who Can Do No Wrong Who U Look Up To rather than like friend vibes? and at first that manifested for him like. oh i feel protected by her. but now its like . Oh i feel protected by her but Also i want her to understand her self worth and see herself the way i see her bc like i would like her to feel comfortable enough to allow herself to also get taken care of and protected.... but yeah
agni is ! hm! pre brain damage school agni was too busy to form any like. meaningful connections w anyone. that shit was hard as it was on its own and it also just like. Wasnt Top Priority so she didnt put a lot of effort into it bc she was 2 busy stressing over academics. Her Roommate Was Cool but also she felt a little intimidated by her.
crimesagni has uhhh friendly work acquaintances that she , again, didnt let herself put a lot of stake in but still genuinely enjoyed their presence! But I Mean Like. Seras. Yeah. seras is definitely The Exception Of That. #JustBestFriendThings!! its cool how friendly the.y are . also like. the party is the first time agni’s had a Friend Group before and like people who want to hang out w her..... she rlly enjoys it! turns out things r much more linear n lucid when u have outside ppl as frames of reference. also they are all very kind to her which makes her real happy, n seem to genuinely care abt her wellbeing, and dont mind all of the shit she’s gotten them into w her Work Stuff.
33. Did they ever dye their hair before? If so, to what colour? Did they like it?
pen hasnt but if he Could he’d dye his hair black >:) little goth boy
agni also hasnt, and i dont think she would care to that much even if given the opportunity! if someone wanted to like, practice on her hair tho, she’d offer it!
53. What is something that they want but can’t have?
pen . lol. he wants the period of his life back before everything went to shit, when he was likeeee 17. he just kinda wants to exist in that little time bubble forever.
agni i think deep down would like to go back before she self-sabotaged her life and was still on track to being a respectable member of society w a good career, just for a little bit n not permanently, to compare her quality of life then w her quality of life now and see if it was worth it.
67. What is something that is simple, but always makes them smile?
pen: when his mom wld dance with him!!! playing hide and seek w mikolai during high mourning when he was a kid!! juniper’s little “ehhhh” moments!! when anybody (but esp ori and juni) laugh at his silly jests >:) going to dinner parties and knowing essactly what to do >:) when his friends let him take care of them, like when juni let him brush his hair!!!
agni: lavinia reading over her good marks and telling her how proud she is!! edda walking her to the temple when she was really little after dressing her up real pretty and holding her hand the whole time!! the way seras says her full name!! when dendy sings his little songs!!! Amadeus Antics. the fact that cyrus asked for her n elviras help w his home stuff and he thinks shes like. competent enough to be of help!
78. If they had a nightmare, who would they run to?
at home, pen would run to his mom 100%, and just kinda cry for a little bit, and then probably have a sleepover in her room.
w the party, pen would go to ori oops! he wouldnt want to wake her up like, physically, bc he wouldnt want to catch her off guard and have her Burst Into Flames, but probably hover in her doorway and tell her what happened. and ask if he should try to go back to sleep or not, or what he shld do.
now that ori has Unbalanced Humors tho, pen probably would not want to bother her bedrest, so he’d go to juni, jangle on up to his bed and be all stubborn n not leave him alone bc he’d be too scared to try n go back to sleep on his own!! Lots Of Lamenting
back in zadash if agni Could, she wld go to seras (IM SORRY SHES LIKE THIS SHES JUST A CRINGEFAIL WITH ONE (1) FRIEND)... ask if she cld lay on hands her so she cld rule out Brain Chemical Stuff being the culprit, but even if that wasnt the case Ask 2 Be Held. A Little Bit. she usually gets reallyy overstimulated with physical contact and it is Bad but with her It Is Just Good And Nice. yknow.
w the party, agni would probably try to deal w it herself, first and foremost. if she cldnt, she’d either go to cyrus bc he’s very nice to her and ask if she can look at some of his art stuff to calm down, or theo bc she has a very calming voice and is rlly good at thinking things through logically which comforts her, or adaeze bc Mayhaps She Has A Nice Mango Snack Like Last Time Again!!
#i have Disease Of Talk About My Kids Forever#thank you for question....sss....#dnd tag#mel talks#agni#penance the jester
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Rewriting Saints Row IV
Hi this is my absolute least favorite game of the series and I kind of hate it! But here I am regardless putting my time and efforts into making an entire post dedicated to what I like and (in my opinions) how to fix the parts I don’t like...
This is also written to match by SRTT post rather than the base canon for the games! Which literally changes nothing but Johnny is already known to be alive before this game, so yknow...
This is also a HUGE post whoops
And again, this is just for fun. Don’t like it? Don’t interact with it. I’m not forcing you to read this. That being said, I do like discussing this kind of stuff so I totally up if you wanna just talk about alternatives or how you think things would play out and stuff
Plot/Story Specific Changes:
President’s Cabinet:
Fuck Keith David! Get him out of here! Leave sir! Go back to your movies!
Johnny Gat is our new Vice President because we know regardless of his skill at the matter, The Boss would make him his VP
This also gives Ben King a lot more reason to hold it against The Boss that he isn’t the VP, because at least before Keith David was a likable actor and had his own skillset for the role. Now it’s Johnny fucking Gat who has all the diplomatic and political tact of a shoe
The Boss’ dream isn’t some stupid 50s sitcom, that was so dumb, hardehar 50s is so nice and polite my ass
I think shit like meeting Julius, the boat explosion, Dex’s attempt to kill them, Magarac Statue blowing up even if they tried to go there, Johnny bleeding out after the fight with Jyunichi, and probably much more are better suited pieces to a much larger much more intimidating and genuine nightmare sim that would have broken The Boss inevitably
All the times they almost died because they weren’t quick enough, all the times they just barely saved their friends? A lot scarier than “oh noes I cawn’t kiww anybodwy uwu” crap
Zinyak doesn't really destroy the Earth
First of all: I don’t think he’d waste so many potential assets over the folly of one idiot
Second of all: The man’s supposed to be like a genius of sorts? So I find it ridiculous that he doesn’t have the ability to hide the fact that Earth is Actually Totally Fine from an idiot like The Boss
Third of all: To avoid Kinzie being oh so smart and debunking Zinyak’s scheme- She’s absolutely distraught when the Earth blew up and surprisingly caught up in her emotions, a pretty new thing for her. So I think it’s plausible she would bee too caught up in the moment to do much and afterwards is too caught up trying to help The Boss find and rescue what they believe is the last hopes for humanity
Kinzie doesn’t save anyone before The Boss, she goes straight for The Boss and before trying to go to Earth, they rescue Johnny Gat
Kinzie was prepared prior to saving The Boss with a few locations already in mind that she found as she was looking for them
One of which obvs ended up being Johnny
Another of which is a Surprise Prison that will help us later
All she knows is that it’s definitely based from Stilwater in ye olden days (first game, not actually ye olden days lmao) so she was assuming it was definitely either The Boss or Johnny
(Spoiler it’s Lin)
Additionally: The sim we do activities and hang out in isn’t Steelport. It should have been Stilwater and you know it.
After the Earth is “destroyed” and The Boss needs to go back into the sim and start recruiting people, Johnny steps in a lot when discussing who to save next
Sorry Matt, your rescue is getting pushed back a little
Johnny’s very adamant about not saving Matt first, “We are not saving that little goth punk whatever kid before we save our girl and Pierce. I don’t give a fuck that you’re president, I’m impeaching you, we’re saving Shaundi next. Not Matt.”
Shaundi’s nightmare sim stays relatively the same, but maybe polish up the writing better
I like her nightmare and the angle, but the writing just felt very,,,awkward to me?
She was supposed to be hung up on feeling helpless and the fact that she felt that because she was always “the damsel” and in need of protection, that Johnny was gone
But the writing kind of just skimmed over that
Then they save Pierce because, yeah, they give him a lot of shit, but he’s one of Johnny and The Boss and Shaundi’s closest friends and Johnny’s already made it clear they’re not saving anyone else until they got both Shaundi and Pierce back
Then you have the 3 rescues that you pick the order for
Asha
Ben
Matt
Then comes the replacement for Johnny’s canon rescue; It’s Lin’s Rescue Now
Kinzie isn’t sure who it really could be because they already have The Boss and Johnny, and they’ve already identified which sim is Ben’s
She asks Pierce and Shaundi for help trying to identify the sim while Johnny and The Boss are fuckin around in the sim
Neither of them have a clue who it could be
But both of them recognize the invading gang members in the sim as Westside Rollerz members so they recommend asking Johnny and The Boss about it
Johnny and The Boss have a moment of “Holy fucking shit, there’s no way” “It couldn’t be her, could it?” all the while the rest of the crew is just like “Any day now, who couldn’t it be?”
Lin’s nightmare sim is the events following up to her kidnapping and then the moments before Zinyak got her when she was in the process of drowing
A street race where some shithead Roller sabotaged Lin’s car so she had to forfeit midrace and then some guys kidnap her
I was figuring you’d be racing to catch up to her and then the race ends for you when she has to pullover
And then a brief cutscene of her trying to fight of some Rollerz goons while The Boss is locked in their car and can’t get out no matter how hard they try to break the window or bust it open
Then a followup cutscene Lin and Sharp arguing about The Playa not arriving to her rescue
“It appears to me like your little friend won’t be joining us. Oh well, we’ll take care of them soon enough. For now, just you will have to do.”
“Could your head be any further up your ass? Get on with it already, I’m getting bored here.”
And a short line from The Boss like, “What an asshole, jokes on him I wasted that son of a bitch years ago. And I’m not leaving without Lin this time.”
The last part is a timed boss battle with Sharp
Kinzie’s trying to do her tech thing and find a workaround to save Lin from drowning while The Boss fends off Sharp and miscellaneous goons
After Lin’s rescued and Sharp is dead, she steals the gun from The Boss in a cutscene and empties it into Sharp
“I have been waiting too fucking long to do that.”
There’s a brief reunion scene between her and The Boss
“Man, you don’t know how glad I am to see you.”
“Oh. My. God. You can fucking talk, that’s almost as crazy as the fact I’ve been living in this hellhole for years....You look good, did you do something to your hair?”
“You have no idea, Lin. You’ve missed a lot.”
“Nothing we can’t talk about over a beer after we get out of here. Speaking of, you got a plan for that or-?”
Kinzie chimes in, “I do.”
Kinzie isn’t the one who defends Matt when he says the mission is a bad idea because that was dumb and out of character, agree with him maybe, but not defend him
Instead of Keith’s betrayal/loyalty mission/whatever; We get Lin going into the simulation on her own to try and save Donnie after having Matt find his sim for her when The Boss pushes off saving Donnie as something to do later since Donnie’s not exactly useful in a mission like saving the universe and destroying Zinyak
“How do you even know he’s not dead? What makes you think Zinyak even abducted him?”
“Because I know he’s still alive, and Matt found him.”
“Look, we’ll take care of this after we end Zinyak. There’s no cars for him to rig or information to leak to us with these guys.”
“There’s gotta be a fucking reason he got abducted, playa. He’s worth saving.”
Johnny chimes in, “We’re not saving your stupid boyfriend right now, Lin. We have bigger fucking problems to deal with.”
It just progresses into a whole fight and the others are kind of just like....”Holy shit....there’s three of them now.” until Ben King steps in and tells them to all shut the fuck up
“Listen, Lin. We’re going to get your boy, but we aren’t doing it now. It’ll be the first thing after we kick Zinyak’s ass.”
The Boss chimes in, “Who said anything about the f-”
“I said...it’ll be the first thing we do, got it?”
Donnie’s nightmare sim is The Boss attacking his garage but Lin never shows up and instead he gets “killed” and then it’s The Boss harassing him and attacking him to get him to rig the Brotherhood vehicles and for the location of Carlos and Maero threatening him and ultimately “killing” him as well and then repeat
Bet The Boss kind of feels a little bad about always picking on him now, huh
Lin is at least, she feels guilty about setting up the raid on Donnie’s garage in SR1 and then just feels really pissed off about The Boss going after him more in SR2
Eventually The Boss shows up to help and with some hacking skills(TM) is given their superpowers and Lin is given powers as well to save Donnie
Obviously he can’t believe Lin is fucking ALIVE let alone just SAVED his ass
“Y-You’re alive? But Mr.Sharp killed you! A-And I let him! They found your body in the river and-....where the hell have you been for so long?”
“Listen, Donnie, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”
“Are you sure? Because Earth got invaded by aliens and I’ve been dying repeatedly everyday since.”
“Shit, yeah. That son of a bitch, Zinyak, saved my ass from drowning back in Stilwater. This asshole over her saved me from that.”
“I bet their to blame for all this! It’s always their fault! Ultor, STAG, Gangstas in Space, Cyrus Temple, they’re the fucking president now can you believe that?”
The Boss chimes in, “I’m standing right fucking here! And for your information, I happen to be an excellent president!”
“Now’s really not the time, playa.”
And also that The Boss also SAVED him
“I thought you fucking hated me, I can’t believe you just did that.”
“Yeah, well, don’t get your panties in a twist, I’m only here for Lin.”
“Oh.”
Okay I lied, Zinyak DOES destroy the Earth for realsies
But only towards the end of the game, like following up to the boss battle
He reveals like
“Oh, it seems you haven’t learned your lesson then. I suppose I’ll have to really blow up your pitiful little planet then? Such a shame really, humanity could have been quite useful to the Zin Empire, but one must cut’s one’s losses sometimes. Their certainly not worth the trouble your putting me through here.”
This gives him time however to have abducted more people, including like Oleg, Viola, Donnie, etc etc etc
Fuck the Enter the Dominatrix DLC
Yeah it’s funny and all but like, where’s something actually interesting and additional to the game?
Replace it with DLC where you rescue like Viola and Oleg and stuff instead
Viola’s nightmare obviously would have to do with being stuck working for Killbane and probably have a boss battle where you fight simbane after he tries to kill Viola as well after having killed her sister
Oleg has a few options I think but the most appealing idea to me is a nightmare about him trying (and failing repeatedly) to escape the KGB
Character Specific Changes:
There really isn’t much to be put here shockingly
Maybe I’m the only one who thinks this but I think they should have expanded on the jokey romances more
I’m not talkin’ like full on bioware romances, just yknow maybe a little more than a single repeatable scene that varies from being shockingly indepth (Johnny) to just a fucking joke (Kinzie)
Maybe like add in a decision for a difference between just like casual sex or an actual romance with the characters
If you pick an actual romance then there’s random little banter lines about it when you have homies and maybe a few lines in some cutscenes or smth, nothing huge
Like say, you have Pierce and Shaundi as homies with you:
Romance Shaundi:
P: It’s about damn time someone did something
S: What are you talking about?
P: Uh, you and The Boss? Duh
S: Oh my god, shut up
P: Took ya’ long enough...y'all only been eye fucking each other as long as I can remember
S: Shut up, Pierce!
P: Chill! I’m happy for you, girl! Don’t attack me!
Romance Pierce:
S: So...you and The Boss, huh?
P: I already don’t like where this is going
S: I’m just surprised is all, you’ve been into them since like day one
P: No. I haven’t.
S: [snorts] Yeah, right. You used to get so upset when-
P: Shut up! They’re standing right there!
Or uh Pierce and Johnny:
Romance Pierce:
J: Hey, man, I’m proud of you for finally tellin’ The Boss how you feel
P: Wh- I didn’t- I’m not the one who-
J: But if you ever even think about hurting them [cocks gun] I won’t hesitate to put a cap in your ass
P: Man, calm down. I ain’t gonna do shit, jesus
J: [laughs] I’m just messin’ with you, Pierce. I’m not gonna shoot you.....Unless...
P: This is why I don’t tell you things, Gat! What the hell, man?!
Romance Johnny:
P: I can’t believe you and The Boss weren’t already fucking
J: Me neither
P: Didn’t you ever...yknow...like wonder? You never even thought about it?
J: Oh, no. I thought about it plenty. I wasn’t about to be the one to say somethin’ though
P: Did we finally find something Johnny Gat is scared of?
J: Fuck no, man, just after what happened with Eesh-
P: So...you were scared?”
J: No!
Lin getting to know everyone is a very big thing, like she’s suddenly surrounded by new people and everyone but Johnny and The Boss from before her abduction are dead
She gets along really well with Shaundi, Johnny (duh), Ben King, Asha, and Donnie (duh)
She gets along pretty damn well with Pierce too but it’s a pretty similar teasing relationship as Shaundi and Pierce and she gives him a hard time a lot
He gripes about how he has to deal with 2 Shaundis and Lin now a lot
She and Asha are pretty different but also pretty similar, they’re both really stubborn and dedicated to what they deem their “duties” but Lin still likes to let loose and have fun a lot more than Asha
A lot of their interactions consist of Lin trying to convince Asha to just let loose “a little” and have some fun
Asha for the most part wouldn’t ever really admit that she likes Lin but if pushed she’d definitely say something like “I definitely respect her. Maybe the Saints wouldn’t be as ridiculous and out of control if she was never taken from them before.”
Also because again you can pry wlw Lin from my cold dead hands we get this exchange:
“You know...you remind me a lot of one of my exes.”
“That’s...nice.”
“Stubborn, pretty, law-abiding, all work no play-”
“Is there a point to this?”
“Not really, I just keep thinking about it.”
“I see...and what happened to them?”
“She broke up with me for some prick named Blake...[laughs] So I broke his nose next time I saw him. Detention for a month, but definitely worth it to see her face.”
“No wonder The President likes you...”
She also gets along with Matt pretty well, having gone to him to find Donnie instead of Kinzie, although that was simply because she figured Matt would keep quiet about it and not tell The Boss, as well as Kinzie was already doing 101 things for The Boss at the time
She really doesn’t understand the whole Nyteblade thing but vampires are kind of cool she guesses and also it’s not like there’s a ton of shows or books left to entertain herself with, at least with Nyteblade, Matt’s got the memory of an elephant and probably totally recreates a ton of the episodes and key scenes because he is Absolutely That Guy first of all
She ends up getting pretty into it but if you ask about it she’ll shrug it off as simply because it’s “the only show left to watch”
Lin also remarks with Shaundi how she reminds her a lot of herself
“You know, I used to be some fun loving party girl myself.”
“Really? What happened?”
“Los Carnales and Julius fucking Little. Couldn’t go five feet out of my house without some assholes doing a drive-by or starting gang wars.”
“Oh...”
“Had to step up if I wanted it to stop, we see how well that turned out.”
“...Yeah....”
Alternatively to the nightmare sim swap I listed earlier...Johnny Gat would be The Boss’ husband in the 50s nightmare sim for sure
Kinzie definitely brings that up to Johnny if they’re both homies, especially if you romanced Johnny
Matt Miller and Donnie friendship when-
Turns out Donnie’s also a fan of Nyteblade
And Matt liked the Feed Dogs’ admittedly short lived time of activity
They both geek out of dumb shit and also talk about how fuckin scary The Boss can be and how lucky they are as some of the few remaining living members of gangs that The Boss fucking demolished
CID gets a lil more establishment
aka I mean he gets like a lil hologram of what he used to look like before becoming an AI in the zin system when he’s in the sim so he can hold guns and run around with you as a homie
also cut the whole thing of him trying to bargain with The Boss for “a woman” because that entire segment was weird and uncomfortable
#saints row#saints row 4#johnny gat#matt miller#pierce washington#asha odekar#shaundi#zinyak#benjamin king#kinzie kensington#saints row lin#saints row donnie#stop talkin playa#rewriting saints row
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Wake Me Up - Chapter 3
Summertime. Young. Single. Free.
You were living your dream life. You had a great place, amazing friends and a steady job. Independent and happy and free, what more could you ask for?
You didn’t think that meeting Chanyeol at a concert or Minho on the beach would influence your life as much as they did. They weren’t supposed to, anyway.
What exactly are you to do with whirlwind romances that show up when you weren’t expecting them?
Characters: Park Chanyeol, Choi Minho, OC’s and appearances by others.
Soundtrack: Geronimo - Sheppard
Chapter 1, 2
We couldn’t stay late this time. We had added several hours to our trip home and both Presley and I had to be at work early in the morning. It was hard to say goodbye, though. Chanyeol and I linked pinkies as we walked to the car. My heart sank more and more with every step. We exchanged phone numbers on the way, and he promised to FaceTime me from the road as often as he could.
He got to the passenger side with me, but neither of us reached for the handle to open the door. I reached down and fiddled with his shirt. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to get this back to you…”
He reached down and cupped my chin, gently forcing me to make eye contact with him. “This isn’t the last time that I’m going to see you. We’ll figure something out. I promise.”
I smiled at his promise and nodded. He leaned forward and gave me another small kiss before Kihyun, from the drivers side with Presley said, “we really should let them get on the road.” We all agreed and Chanyeol finally opened my door for me. I got into the car and, after one final kiss to my forehead, he shut it.
We started driving home, and I promised to stay up with Presley as best as I could. We talked about her future with Kihyun and what they were going from here. The only answer she had for me was a shrug.
“I missed him. It was like a wave crashed on me when I saw him again, yknow?” I did know. That feeling was all too familiar for me, which is why it made me nervous.
“You don’t think you’re just forgetting the bad to focus on the good? I mean, you told me a ton of stuff he had done to you. I just don’t want bad habits to repeat just because y’all had a good weekend.”
“If they do,” she said, “then at least I got to experience the rush of being giddy again.”
“You don’t want to experience the rush of being giddy over someone new?”
“Different rushes.” Presley looked at me and smiled. “Why? New rush overwhelming you a bit.”
I was glad it was dark, because I knew that I had blushed. I cleared my throat. “Yeah. I… uh… I’m not really sure where that came from.”
“You’re the last person I ever expected to have something like that happen to you.” Presley said. “You’ve been so shut off from the idea of a relationship lately.”
Nodding, I said, “I know. After Mark…” I rolled my eyes. “But maybe that’s why this happened; because I wasn’t looking for it? Does that make sense?”
The drive was rough. Over halfway, I ended up taking over for Presley since she was struggling to keep her eyes open. We made it back to my apartment around 4 am, and both immediately crashed out. Presley made it to the couch and didn’t even wait for me to get her a change of clothes or a blanket. I was fairly certain that I had fallen asleep while walking to my room.
My alarm rang at 7:30 and I whined. I knew that I couldn’t call in. My boss had overheard me talking about my trip, so she had made a comment in passing about “making sure I show up on Monday.” I woke Presley up so she could use the second bathroom to get ready and she rummaged through my closet for work clothes to wear. After a quick shower and light make up, I trudged my way out the door in an outfit that, more than likely, wasn’t going to be considered “professional” enough. I was too exhausted to care though.
My morning conference started out as hell. The coffee I had made at the office had run out too quickly and was taking its time in letting its caffeine kick in. There was no way that everybody around me didn’t notice my eyes flutter closed once or twice. At one point, my coworker Jongdae kicked me under the desk to jolt me awake. I appreciated the gesture, but would have liked his kick to hurt less. Eventually, though, the meeting ended. My boss reiterated the importance of finishing the reports due tomorrow and I nodded as I headed off to my desk to plug headphones in and to block out everyone else.
Punching numbers and collecting data for things such as stock increases and decreases was boring enough as it was. Add in that, tomorrow, my extra quarterly report of what the budget increases would allow for pay increases, and my day felt set up for failure. I groaned to myself that I would never, ever take a trip like that again when I heard a voice over my headphones.
“Long weekend?”
I spun to see Jongdae standing there with a venti from Starbucks stretched out to me.
“I am 99 percent sure that you are my guardian angel.” I gasped as I reached out for the coffee, without even knowing what was inside of the cup. Luckily, Jongdae and I had done enough coffee runs together that he knew how to flavor my coffee for me.
“One day,” he started as he pulled a chair up next to me, “I’m going to get you something completely different, just to watch your face when you take a sip.” I laughed, but silently feared that day.
“How was the trip?” he asked. Jongdae was my one coworker I could be completely honest with. We had trained together, and he and his girlfriend, Nikki, were one of the only other couples I could tolerate being around without feeling like a third wheel.
I thought about how I was going to answer, but Jongdae said, “ahhh! What’s that smile for?!” My hand flew to cover my mouth and I realized that, just even thinking about Chanyeol had brought a grin to my lips.
Embarrassed, I shushed him before spilling the whole story. His eyes grew wide as he said, “wait, wait, wait. Miss ‘I cancel a date because a guy called me pretty so he’s obviously moving too fast’ has met her match?”
“Shut up, Dae.” I rolled my eyes. “Let’s be honest. Now that the weekend is over, I’ll probably never hear from him again.”
Saying those words out loud settled some disappointment in my chest that I didn’t dare show outwardly.
As if the universe was laughing at me, in that exact moment, my phone lit up on my desk. Chanyeol’s name flashed across the screen and my cheeks grew warm.
“Sure. Never again.” Jongdae winked at me and stood up to leave my office. I thanked him again for the coffee, then, after a quick scan to make sure my boss wasn’t around, I opened the text.
Received text: Good morning, gorgeous.
Sent text: Good morning sleeping beauty.
Received text: hey! In my world, waking up before 11 is waking up early.
Sent text: oh the life of a rock star. It must be so difficult to be you.
Received text: thank you for acknowledging my struggle.
Received text: I hope your morning hasn’t been too rough.
Sent text: I’m pretty exhausted.
Sent text: ...but it was worth it.
Received text: I’m glad to read that. What time are you off? Wanna FaceTime before my show tonight?
Sent text: sure! I’ll try to leave by 5:30.
Received text: I’ll talk to you soon then.
I laid my phone back down and got butterflies all over again. He wanted to FaceTime?! It was only one day, but he was genuinely making an effort. I started to wonder how long that would last, but I also knew that I couldn’t do that to myself. I needed to enjoy this for what it was. Whatever it was- it was nice.
Making sure I had hit send on my reports, I grabbed my bag and bolted out of the doors at exactly 5:30 pm. Jongdae told me to slow down and shouted something about leaving when he still has reports to do. I waved my phone at him and told him I would fill him in tomorrow, which didn’t lessen his whines.
Thankful I lived close, I sped home, only slowing down for red lights and the one speed trap that I knew a cop hid behind. I don’t even remember running to my apartment and unlocking the door. Desi’s voice was laced with confusion as she asked if I was okay as I sprinted past her in the kitchen to get to my room. I said, “tell you in a minute!” before shutting the door and sitting on my bed. I took a deep breath, opened my front facing camera to make myself look less disheveled, and then pulled up Chanyeol’s contact name to hit “call.”
It only rang a few times before his face filled my screen. The giddy feeling was back. He beamed at me and I couldn’t help but smile back at his infectious grin.
“She lives!” he cheered.
“Barely! I’m surprised I’m even awake right now. You should feel special that I didn’t come home from work and just pass out.”
“Well thank you for gracing me with your presence!” he teased.
We talked about my day and my job. He asked for details on the reports I had to be done, and it was nice to talk to someone so genuinely interested in learning about me. He told me about their drive from Austin to Albuquerque, New Mexico. Apparently Kihyun and Dojoon had argued about Presley and what it meant for the band since the last time, apparently there was drama.
“It’s great song writing material, isn’t it?” I joked. Subconsciously, I got worried that this would mean bad news for Pres in the future.
Chanyeol shrugged. “Not my relationship. Not my business. They tried to bring you up too but I told them that was my business, not theirs.” I felt a twinge if guilt for gushing about him to other people when he seemed to want to keep it between us, but that faded when he finally said, “I did end up telling them that I thought you were great and I couldn’t wait to get to know you better.”
His ears turned red and he bit his bottom lip, waiting for my reaction to his confession.
“Well, Chanyeol, the feeling is definitely mutual.”
Relief crossed his face and I heard Kihyun in the background calling out to him.
Chanyeol looked disappointed as he said, “I guess it’s time for our sound check. I’ll text you after the show?” I nodded and told him I would talk to him later.
The second that we hung up, Desi threw my bedroom door open.
“Who. the. hell. was. that?!” Her eyes were wide and each word was accented heavily
I buried my face in a pillow and began laughing. She sat down and I filled her in on the whole story. I told her Chanyeol was the reason we had gone to Austin and added an extra day to the trip. I showed her his shirt that I had kept. She stared at me in disbelief.
“You hate love!” she shouted at me.
“I do not!” I objected.
“Yes you do!” Collin called ou tfrom the other room.
“Hey! I didn’t receive your RSVP to this conversation!” I yelled back.
Desi laughed but said, “this is good! This is growth! You’re opening up! That’s amazing.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not getting married tomorrow. I’m just…” pausing, I realized that I had no clue what I was doing. “What the hell am I doing?!” I looked at her and she shook a finger at me.
“Don’t you dare start that! Don’t do that thing where you overthink things!”
“I’m offended at your accusation!” I swung my pillow at her.
“Give this a chance,” Desi’s voice was soft and serious. “You deserve to be happy in love again.”
Sighing, I told her she was right.
We ordered delivery and, immediately after, I passed out. I was so exhausted from not sleeping for most of the weekend that, although I wanted to wait up for Chanyeol’s text, I knew that it wasn’t going to happen.
The next morning, I woke up and, after shutting off my alarm, saw one unread message from Chanyeol on my phone.
Received text: I hope you’re sleeping well, lovely. Talk to you in the morning.
I pulled my phone close to my chest and couldn’t help the smile that crossed my lips. Maybe this was going to be a very good thing after all.
#exosnet#exo#kpop#exo fanfic#exo fanfiction#kpop fanfiction#kpop fanfic#exo fan fiction#exo fan fic#kpop fan fiction#kpop fan fic#chanyeol
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Ask A Pro: Does Birthday Sex Count As A Present For My Boyfriend?
Dear Head Pro,
I read your advice like its my life and you always seem to know what to do. I’ve been seeing this guy for a little over a month and our relationship is exclusive hookup/borderline dating — we’ve been out on one official date and have spent a lot of time together. His bday is coming up super soon and I have NO IDEA what to get him. I really want it to work out between us (i.e. don’t want there to be any pressure because that does more harm than good) and don’t want to get the wrong thing and disappoint him/freak him out. I also don’t want it to look like I’m trying too hard but want to make sure I show the right amount of effort. He knows I like him but I’ve never actually told him that. He is super generous to me and I don’t want him to see what I give him as me being cheap. Do I go for the sexy or sweet? What should be my budget? More importantly, given our current stage in the relationship what is the most appropriate gift to give? Plz help, I’m dying here.
Xoxo, Birthday Sex or what….
Dear Sure, Why Not,
Man, birthdays are really fucking weird, when you think about it. They make sense for children — kids are dumb and dont accomplish anything and thus are largely (and rightly) ignored, so its nice to let them have a special day once in a while. But as adults? Its like, Congratulations, you made it another 365 days in a first-world country without dying! Lets all go out to an annoying group dinner (split checks plz). Adding sex to the equation makes it even weirder — My vagina is available to you on demand, but how about I get you something youd ACTUALLY like?
I dont think the needlessly delicate nature of your relationship matters (as an aside, if youre hanging out and fucking on the reg and yet you think telling him you like him will torpedo the relationship, stop and think for a minute about what that says about him). It should be somewhat personal, and should reflect the fact that youre in an intimate relationship — an Applebees gift card aint gonna cut it, not that it ever does. As for budget, that depends on where you are in life. If youre broke-ass college students, Id say keep it under $50. If youre real adults, keep it under $100.
My vote is a nice bottle of booze, his favorite if youre privy to that information. If youre in college, replace nice bottle of booze with a case of beer thats not Natty Light. A girl I was dating in college got me one of those once (Miller High Life — THE CHAMPAGNE OF BOTTLED TEARS), and it was at least two weeks before I dumped her and started fucking someone else. Otherwise, get him a bottle of scotch, actually go out for dinner, and maybe let him touch your butthole or something.
Feliz Cumpleanos,
Head Pro
Hey Head Pro,
I recently moved to a new city where I didn’t previously know anyone for grad school. I’ve made some good friends at school, but its been pretty boring (read: nonexistent) on the guy front and I don’t want to shit where I eat since 1. grad school is basically high school all over again and the rumor mill is an active one, and 2. I spend enough fucking time with these people and it would be nice to date someone outside the bubble.
Any tips on how to meet people thats not a blackout at a bar situation or on a dating app? I’m also super busy with school so it’s not like I’ve got plenty of time to dedicate, but I’m going a little crazy from boredom so I need some sort of remedy. Help me with your infinite wisdom!
Bored in the Bubble
Dear Bubble Girl,
Christ, what grad school do you go to where its basically high school? If thats the case, can we all stop putting on airs and and accept grad school for the tremendous time- and money-suck that it is (unless you intend to add a PhD to the end of your name, that is)? This is the endgame of the stupid educational arms race were experiencing, where every mouth-breathing townie feels like they have to have an advanced degree to qualify for a job as a bank teller. There are still ditches that need to be dug, yknow?
Anyway, Im a little baffled as to how youre unable to meet people on a college campus in a major city. If I found myself in that situation, I would literally die from sexual exhaustion, and probably flunk out of my Masters in Organic Social Community Building. WORTH IT. Youre also doing that fun thing where you expressly state that you arent interested in taking advantage of the convenient resources that most people appreciate (i.e., bars, dating apps and your social circle). Thats like saying I dont believe in killing animals and I dont like the taste of meat, but I want a hamburger — please advise.
Since Im assuming youre on or near campus, there are probably about 1,000 groups, clubs and activities you could get involved in. There are also recreational and intramural sports, if youre the sporting type. Unfortunately, anything like that is going to demand some of your time (which youll have plenty of after your first year, if you dont already), but again youre sour on the resources that dont. What do you do for fun? Do you paint? Jog? Write? Yoga? Act out erotic Scream Queens fan fiction in your living room? Whatever it is youre into, I guarantee theres a like-minded group of students (both grad and undergrad) who are into the same things.
That will entail mixing your personal hobbies with your love life, but sometimes you have to make some compromises to get what you want in life — like going to grad school, for instance.
Scholarly Kisses,
Head Pro
Head Pro is required wants to answer your questions about life, love and birthday sex. Email him at [email protected] for advice.
from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/ask-a-pro-does-birthday-sex-count-as-a-present-for-my-boyfriend/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/172055697002
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Ask A Pro: Does Birthday Sex Count As A Present For My Boyfriend?
Dear Head Pro,
I read your advice like its my life and you always seem to know what to do. I’ve been seeing this guy for a little over a month and our relationship is exclusive hookup/borderline dating — we’ve been out on one official date and have spent a lot of time together. His bday is coming up super soon and I have NO IDEA what to get him. I really want it to work out between us (i.e. don’t want there to be any pressure because that does more harm than good) and don’t want to get the wrong thing and disappoint him/freak him out. I also don’t want it to look like I’m trying too hard but want to make sure I show the right amount of effort. He knows I like him but I’ve never actually told him that. He is super generous to me and I don’t want him to see what I give him as me being cheap. Do I go for the sexy or sweet? What should be my budget? More importantly, given our current stage in the relationship what is the most appropriate gift to give? Plz help, I’m dying here.
Xoxo, Birthday Sex or what….
Dear Sure, Why Not,
Man, birthdays are really fucking weird, when you think about it. They make sense for children — kids are dumb and dont accomplish anything and thus are largely (and rightly) ignored, so its nice to let them have a special day once in a while. But as adults? Its like, Congratulations, you made it another 365 days in a first-world country without dying! Lets all go out to an annoying group dinner (split checks plz). Adding sex to the equation makes it even weirder — My vagina is available to you on demand, but how about I get you something youd ACTUALLY like?
I dont think the needlessly delicate nature of your relationship matters (as an aside, if youre hanging out and fucking on the reg and yet you think telling him you like him will torpedo the relationship, stop and think for a minute about what that says about him). It should be somewhat personal, and should reflect the fact that youre in an intimate relationship — an Applebees gift card aint gonna cut it, not that it ever does. As for budget, that depends on where you are in life. If youre broke-ass college students, Id say keep it under $50. If youre real adults, keep it under $100.
My vote is a nice bottle of booze, his favorite if youre privy to that information. If youre in college, replace nice bottle of booze with a case of beer thats not Natty Light. A girl I was dating in college got me one of those once (Miller High Life — THE CHAMPAGNE OF BOTTLED TEARS), and it was at least two weeks before I dumped her and started fucking someone else. Otherwise, get him a bottle of scotch, actually go out for dinner, and maybe let him touch your butthole or something.
Feliz Cumpleanos,
Head Pro
Hey Head Pro,
I recently moved to a new city where I didn’t previously know anyone for grad school. I’ve made some good friends at school, but its been pretty boring (read: nonexistent) on the guy front and I don’t want to shit where I eat since 1. grad school is basically high school all over again and the rumor mill is an active one, and 2. I spend enough fucking time with these people and it would be nice to date someone outside the bubble.
Any tips on how to meet people thats not a blackout at a bar situation or on a dating app? I’m also super busy with school so it’s not like I’ve got plenty of time to dedicate, but I’m going a little crazy from boredom so I need some sort of remedy. Help me with your infinite wisdom!
Bored in the Bubble
Dear Bubble Girl,
Christ, what grad school do you go to where its basically high school? If thats the case, can we all stop putting on airs and and accept grad school for the tremendous time- and money-suck that it is (unless you intend to add a PhD to the end of your name, that is)? This is the endgame of the stupid educational arms race were experiencing, where every mouth-breathing townie feels like they have to have an advanced degree to qualify for a job as a bank teller. There are still ditches that need to be dug, yknow?
Anyway, Im a little baffled as to how youre unable to meet people on a college campus in a major city. If I found myself in that situation, I would literally die from sexual exhaustion, and probably flunk out of my Masters in Organic Social Community Building. WORTH IT. Youre also doing that fun thing where you expressly state that you arent interested in taking advantage of the convenient resources that most people appreciate (i.e., bars, dating apps and your social circle). Thats like saying I dont believe in killing animals and I dont like the taste of meat, but I want a hamburger — please advise.
Since Im assuming youre on or near campus, there are probably about 1,000 groups, clubs and activities you could get involved in. There are also recreational and intramural sports, if youre the sporting type. Unfortunately, anything like that is going to demand some of your time (which youll have plenty of after your first year, if you dont already), but again youre sour on the resources that dont. What do you do for fun? Do you paint? Jog? Write? Yoga? Act out erotic Scream Queens fan fiction in your living room? Whatever it is youre into, I guarantee theres a like-minded group of students (both grad and undergrad) who are into the same things.
That will entail mixing your personal hobbies with your love life, but sometimes you have to make some compromises to get what you want in life — like going to grad school, for instance.
Scholarly Kisses,
Head Pro
Head Pro is required wants to answer your questions about life, love and birthday sex. Email him at [email protected] for advice.
Source: http://allofbeer.com/ask-a-pro-does-birthday-sex-count-as-a-present-for-my-boyfriend/
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from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2018/03/20/ask-a-pro-does-birthday-sex-count-as-a-present-for-my-boyfriend/
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Ask A Pro: Does Birthday Sex Count As A Present For My Boyfriend?
Dear Head Pro,
I read your advice like its my life and you always seem to know what to do. I’ve been seeing this guy for a little over a month and our relationship is exclusive hookup/borderline dating — we’ve been out on one official date and have spent a lot of time together. His bday is coming up super soon and I have NO IDEA what to get him. I really want it to work out between us (i.e. don’t want there to be any pressure because that does more harm than good) and don’t want to get the wrong thing and disappoint him/freak him out. I also don’t want it to look like I’m trying too hard but want to make sure I show the right amount of effort. He knows I like him but I’ve never actually told him that. He is super generous to me and I don’t want him to see what I give him as me being cheap. Do I go for the sexy or sweet? What should be my budget? More importantly, given our current stage in the relationship what is the most appropriate gift to give? Plz help, I’m dying here.
Xoxo, Birthday Sex or what….
Dear Sure, Why Not,
Man, birthdays are really fucking weird, when you think about it. They make sense for children — kids are dumb and dont accomplish anything and thus are largely (and rightly) ignored, so its nice to let them have a special day once in a while. But as adults? Its like, Congratulations, you made it another 365 days in a first-world country without dying! Lets all go out to an annoying group dinner (split checks plz). Adding sex to the equation makes it even weirder — My vagina is available to you on demand, but how about I get you something youd ACTUALLY like?
I dont think the needlessly delicate nature of your relationship matters (as an aside, if youre hanging out and fucking on the reg and yet you think telling him you like him will torpedo the relationship, stop and think for a minute about what that says about him). It should be somewhat personal, and should reflect the fact that youre in an intimate relationship — an Applebees gift card aint gonna cut it, not that it ever does. As for budget, that depends on where you are in life. If youre broke-ass college students, Id say keep it under $50. If youre real adults, keep it under $100.
My vote is a nice bottle of booze, his favorite if youre privy to that information. If youre in college, replace nice bottle of booze with a case of beer thats not Natty Light. A girl I was dating in college got me one of those once (Miller High Life — THE CHAMPAGNE OF BOTTLED TEARS), and it was at least two weeks before I dumped her and started fucking someone else. Otherwise, get him a bottle of scotch, actually go out for dinner, and maybe let him touch your butthole or something.
Feliz Cumpleanos,
Head Pro
Hey Head Pro,
I recently moved to a new city where I didn’t previously know anyone for grad school. I’ve made some good friends at school, but its been pretty boring (read: nonexistent) on the guy front and I don’t want to shit where I eat since 1. grad school is basically high school all over again and the rumor mill is an active one, and 2. I spend enough fucking time with these people and it would be nice to date someone outside the bubble.
Any tips on how to meet people thats not a blackout at a bar situation or on a dating app? I’m also super busy with school so it’s not like I’ve got plenty of time to dedicate, but I’m going a little crazy from boredom so I need some sort of remedy. Help me with your infinite wisdom!
Bored in the Bubble
Dear Bubble Girl,
Christ, what grad school do you go to where its basically high school? If thats the case, can we all stop putting on airs and and accept grad school for the tremendous time- and money-suck that it is (unless you intend to add a PhD to the end of your name, that is)? This is the endgame of the stupid educational arms race were experiencing, where every mouth-breathing townie feels like they have to have an advanced degree to qualify for a job as a bank teller. There are still ditches that need to be dug, yknow?
Anyway, Im a little baffled as to how youre unable to meet people on a college campus in a major city. If I found myself in that situation, I would literally die from sexual exhaustion, and probably flunk out of my Masters in Organic Social Community Building. WORTH IT. Youre also doing that fun thing where you expressly state that you arent interested in taking advantage of the convenient resources that most people appreciate (i.e., bars, dating apps and your social circle). Thats like saying I dont believe in killing animals and I dont like the taste of meat, but I want a hamburger — please advise.
Since Im assuming youre on or near campus, there are probably about 1,000 groups, clubs and activities you could get involved in. There are also recreational and intramural sports, if youre the sporting type. Unfortunately, anything like that is going to demand some of your time (which youll have plenty of after your first year, if you dont already), but again youre sour on the resources that dont. What do you do for fun? Do you paint? Jog? Write? Yoga? Act out erotic Scream Queens fan fiction in your living room? Whatever it is youre into, I guarantee theres a like-minded group of students (both grad and undergrad) who are into the same things.
That will entail mixing your personal hobbies with your love life, but sometimes you have to make some compromises to get what you want in life — like going to grad school, for instance.
Scholarly Kisses,
Head Pro
Head Pro is required wants to answer your questions about life, love and birthday sex. Email him at [email protected] for advice.
from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/ask-a-pro-does-birthday-sex-count-as-a-present-for-my-boyfriend/
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Recovery Phase
Welcome to my 2 years worth of recovery story.
The ones’ who’ve known me way before 2015 will know why. But this ones’ for the one who prolly is reading this and dont know hahahaha
I was the girl who loved her ex way too much & is willing to do anything & everything for his happiness. Was supposed to get married but yeah... the longest time ever to move on.
Here’s what everyone didnt know and kept telling me that i always deserve better, when they havent been hearing what was it that is really happening to me, & us. Yes, im gna tell everything that has been happening for the past 2/3 years, till now.
My relationship with my ex was perfect. Prolly the only time i started acting up was when he left me to Brunei, for 9 months.. (yes im also the girl who cant stand being away from my boyfriend for too long) and when i say acting up, i mean, i start being crazy cause i miss him. Hahahah well it was pretty easy cause i had work distracting me. He is honestly a nice, lovely and caring person...
But he had someone else.. oh we were 3 1/2 years together. I knew he had someone else but i kept forgiving him for all that he did cause i loved him & it was too hard for me to let go. & i kept on telling myself that it’ll get better. But i was wrong.
It honestly got worst. It got worst cause i start drifting away from him and do my own stuffs. It really hit me on the night he asked me “b, do you really still love me ?” Cause i know that i was really drifting apart & i also knew what i did what i did... was wrong. Here is what everyone doesnt know... i let guys in.. i let guys be close to me. Only because i wanted to know if he felt what i felt.. if he felt the pain i felt. But nope..
So i stopped wtv i was doing. And he got mad over what i did. I saw him with another girl in his house. I broke up with him. Everyone thought that I actually broke up with him cause he was with another girl in the house. But nope. I broke up with him cause i know the more i hold on, the more shits I’ll be doing, & it’ll be more painful for me. And i knew what was my shortcomings, i knew why the other girl existed. I knew why he did all those. I accepted fate, and left him.
After the break up, i found myself going back to him everytime. I dont even know why. It was hard. Reaaaally hard. I tried Tinder. Met all sorts of guys. Cant seem to forget him still.. then i told myself that maybe i should spend more time with my girlfriend & bestfriend. It worked. But truth to be told, there were times of the day where I’ll rmb him and think of him. I just dont wna start again with someone new... yknow ?
Okay.. the duration from the breakup till i found a boyfriend.... i gained so much weight. It was weird. Serious. Still met my ex a couple of times, just to see how he’s doing. Aight, here’s the part where i start moving on..
I met Anwar.
Not as my officer. But as a guest to my family event. Yep, the first time we met was at my family event.
I was dating his friend...... before i know him.
Something happened and he got me. My life is so confusing.
It tooook meeee sooooo muchhhh to open up to someone new again. I had trouble telling him what is wrong with me, that i tend to just shut myself up. Still checked on my ex once in awhile.
Yes, i treated Anwar like shit for the first 3 months of the relationship. He made so much efforts to heal me, to fix me, to make me love him. He had all the patience which i doubt anyone has. He is really one of a kind..
I started 2016 = i started loving him.
Cause i found out that there was sth else that my ex did wayyyyy before the break up. And I realised that it’s rlly not worth it anymore to think of/abt him. I got engaged to Anwar, mid of the year. I think twice if this is rlly what i want. Yes, i wna settle down but am i doing the right thing ? But as time goes by.. Anwar really showed me.. he guided me all the way, and has never given up. I know right at that moment that he deserves everything in this world. Everything seems to be going really smooth from then on. Gotten over my ex and what he did. Yes... until......
2017 happened. Ally Marcia existed. And it happened again. This girl gave me the shittiest time of my life ever. Im not saying she’s fully at fault. I did scold Anwar for what he did.. he regretted it cause he knows & sees what a minah i can be, when im fucking mad 😂
I felt really empty and useless and worthless. Like why is this happening to me again. Do i really deserve this kind of shit. And again, i shut down from Anwar for almost a month. Zero sayang, zero ‘i love you’, zero kisses, zero attention. I just dk what else to do. I really feel like i wasn’t good enough, no matter how hard i tried.
Tbh, even up till today, just by hearing her name or knowing anyth abt her, can make me feel like i wna kill her... still. Yes. Its really that bad.
She didnt wna give up on trying to get Anwar, even aft 5 months. Even i myself give up on getting mad. Sampai maki maki. Okay im not the kind of person who always curse. But this girl.... i rlly cannot tahan. Can you believe it, even when i sound her and told her to stop it, she still wna disturb my rs and still wna teach my Anwar to lie to me just so she can meet Anwar ? Ridiculous.
But anyways... ive forgave anwar fr all that he did and yes it took alot to make me trust him again. But his efforts is A++. Anwar & I are happy now, with what we both have & with wtv we had faced previously. He has been putting so much efforts in our relationship,to make us work. He did everything for my happiness. He did everything for me. He supports me in everything that i do. Yes, he is my forever & always.
2 years of recovery.. because.. there is existence of 2 unnecessary girls.
Im so glad its the end of the year cause i rlly wna forget all these and put all of these behind. I really love Anwar & ya if you girls wna be close to him.. for no apparent reason, kau standby je kene satu penumbuk. I hope we will get better and better as days goes by.
I love you potato, always 💖
Thank you for existing in my life & making things better for me always.
#nrfdxnwr
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