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#hinted past abuse
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Laura attending the 84 tournament and witnessing everything that happens, she’s proud of her boy for trying his best but she doesn’t quiet approved of him going after his opponents leg like that.
When she makes it to the parking lot and sees Johnny and his teacher arguing she speeds up, intent to butt in and tell the man off for what he’s been teaching her kid.
Then he’s grabbing Johnny in a chokehold and she sees red. She’s running up to them and getting the man over the head with her hand bag, suddenly seeing all those times men had done something similar to her and she won’t stand for her baby experiencing it as well.
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eddywoww · 27 days
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Me: a Father’s Day fic would be fun
Also me: make steve suffer
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gufettogrigio · 1 year
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Bastian contrario
Grimaud's cemetery is grim in the rain. Damon is the one who has had the forethought to bring an umbrella and wouldn't mind sharing but there's not much point. The wet gravel crunches under Jacques' sneakers a few feet in front of him, his steps almost a run. Damon has to bite his tongue. If they shouldn't be seen, why are they here?
Didier Pironi's tomb is unassumingly lined up in a row of others, him and his brother side by side. There's a few flowers, some in pots, some not. Jacques hasn't brought any.
He stands there, in his t-shirt and baggy jeans, stubborn under the rain, just a step away from the shelter of Damon's umbrella. 
"He had a lot of my father's things." - Jacques says  - "My dad never cared enough to have a journal, not enough patience, but he'd keep all of the train tickets, hotel receipts, the flyers and so on. All bunched up in folders. Pironi sorted them out for me in years and gave them to me."
"I didn't know you two talked."
There's a shrug. "He didn't want to. I am very stubborn." 
The rain doesn't let on. Damon considers it a victory that when Jacques decides to sit cross-legged on the gravel in front of the grave, he lets Damon sit by his side with the umbrella. He's soaked through, his bleached blond hair plastered to his forehead, his round glasses fogged up by the rain.
"Once, we were in Monaco, Jody and Pironi came over. I was at the table doing my homework and they came into the room and stayed there talking." 
He takes his glasses off. "I fucked up. I am not good at math."
Jacques says them but they are not his words. It doesn't make them a lie if you believe them. Damon hears what is not said: he has seen Jacques do math for the cars. He's good. A child of eight or nine should not be expected to be 'good'.
"Dad got mad and then got even madder because I knocked the pencil sharpenings over when I scrambled to try and fix the mistakes. He never…he never hit me. Not once. He would just walk out the room like I wasn't interesting anymore. I wasn't a very interesting child. Sometimes my mum wasn't a very interesting woman."
Jacques tilts his head, fingers gripping the tin frame of his glasses. He's never still. Damon knows the look on his face, PR proper. Lie,lie, lie. Keep the family secrets. How dare you do otherwise? But you forfeit your hand when you've killed yourself in a car and Jacques is here in sneakers and a t-shirt and all four wheels on the tarmac. 
"My first real memory of Pironi is him with pencil all over his hands from picking up the sharpenings, sitting next to me doing primary school math."
 He drops the glasses in the gravel and reaches out, the tips of his fingers grazing the headstone. "Didi knew who my father was. Didi saw what I saw. He loved my father anyway. He just wasn't blind. He always made me feel like I wasn't insane for thinking that my father was a horrible person. He also made me feel a lot less guilty for adoring him anyway. And if I win the Championship, I'll bring it to Didi first."
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Mai speaking facts only victim azula is of her father but she made her own choices to abuse her friends and that is on her
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tempest-toss · 1 year
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If it wasn't for Agent Sapphire, maybe I would've continued that cycle...
--Ten
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panics-side-blog · 2 years
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New Cycle - Chapter 5 - 3AMstoryIdeas - Transformers - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]
I seem to always forget to upload the link.
Also as a side note this chapter isn't as much of a wall text like the last one. I also edited the last one to be more easy on the eye. Plus first chapter is rewriten, it has now an addition of 1k words in it.
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celestialmancer · 6 months
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☀️.
#Ramble time about some deeply personal parts of Ishtar’s backstory (things that only friends that can handle heavy subjects get to see)#(if they wanna obviously i aint gonna drop this on those who would rather not but those curious & who can handle it? im chill disclosing)#but regardless…#here we go. touches on Kaletu too.#for obvs reasons this ain’t being posted in public spaces. but all I’ll say is i’ve dropped. enough hints i think.#about just how far kaletu was willing to go w the extents of his abuse.#through the mention of where i derived his name from. & a thing or two on Ishtar’s TH profile#(w the name thing i mean the. Kaletu bein derived from shukaletuda. in mesopotamian mythos. & TH issa thing i said is trauma response)#that honestly isn’t anything i’ll bring up like in spaces where it ain’t allowed ofc. but.#as well as me mentioning this is somethn that he almost got legal repercussions for.#(but didn’t bc money & power & fame talks ig.)#this aspect of their backstory. is. important to me given its purpose as a processing things i went through ordeal.#which is why im so antsy abt who i share it with bc i dont wanna. share that sorta thing w someone who is judgmental af#& wanna only share w ppl who are accepting & even willing to like.#accept ishtar in their past ig. & even realize also why their themes for their arc are so significant. but yeah.#…anyway. ive rambled enough for now in tags? the actual ramble like i said’s only for friends interested ig so.#but i do warn for heavy ass subjects (which again. no problem with me discussing & i do wanna share. just. fear is all.)
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babycharmander · 2 months
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(BOOK OF BILL SPOILERS)
I just finished reading The Book of Bill and I am kindof losing my mind over some of this stuff.
I had wondered if Alex Hirsch might make Bill sympathetic in some way and oh boy I was not expecting him to do it so successfully (and without cheapening Bill's character).
So, we learn that Bill was born into a 2D world... as a mutant who can see into the third dimension. He claims he was absolutely loved by all, but when talking about his powers, he mentions under Pyrokinesis:
"Cipher, Cipher, he's insane / Starting fires with his brain." The kids in grade school could be so cruel. But where are they now, huh? WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
So probably not quite as liked as he was letting on. To add to that, there's the silly straw page, which looks like silly nonsense until you decipher some of the codes:
"EYE DOCTOR OF A DIFFERENT KIND / WHO WANTS TO MAKE HIS PATIENTS BLIND" "THE DOCTOR SAYS / THREE SIPS A DAY / WILL MAKE THE VISIONS / GO AWAY"
I wasn't sure what this meant until I saw someone point out... he was seeing a third dimension that no one else could see. His parents probably took him to the eye doctor to try to "fix" him. Which, speaking of his eye doctor, the coded message in the section about human eyeballs says something interesting:
"MY OPTOMETRIST NEVER SAW IT COMING"
It could be a joke given beforehand he's talking about dissecting a human eye, but given the previous hints of medical abuse, I wouldn't put it past him that he tried to get revenge on his eye doctor.
Oh yeah and the whole thing about him setting his entire dimension on fire? Yeah it turns out it was entirely a mistake (he just wanted everyone to understand the third dimension he was seeing so they could be free of only two dimensions), he was so traumatized by it he blacks out when trying to recall it. He deeply, deeply regrets it, and...
"What? Your ENTIRE home dimension? destroyed? How? By what?" Bill looked distant, more distant than I'd ever seen him. "By a monster."
He sees himself as a monster.
And yet, he's not some innocent, misunderstood being. He still revels in causing pain and chaos. He's terrible in general, but becomes incredibly abusive toward Ford.
"YOU'RE MY PROPERTY. DON'T FORGET IT. The hillbilly abandoned you, your father won't want you returning without millions, you have no friends, and if you died out here in the snow, who would even miss you?"
Which... speaking of him and Ford...
Yes, yes, I know people ship them. But like, whether you see their relationship as romantic or platonic (I see it as the latter), there's some interesting parallels to be made here.
Both Bill and Ford are mutants who were mocked for their being different. (Bill was not physically a mutant, as far as we know, but more in the sense of him having vision stronger than that of everyone else in his dimension, and also having special powers. And he does describe himself as a mutant.) Both became social outcasts, separated from their families but still haunted by them (Ford seeing commercials of Stan on TV and running across old photos of him and his brother, Bill being haunted by his family in some form). Neither could return home for one reason or another. Both more powerful than their peers (Ford intellectually, Bill in terms of actual powers). Both of them isolated and alone. (Yes, Bill does have the Henchmaniacs, but they seem like shallow friends, and only really seem to follow him out of a desire to have a place to party.)
Ford was not aware of most of this, aside from knowing that Bill could not go home because his dimension was destroyed. But Bill absolutely saw himself in Ford. There was no other person he tried to use whom he felt a stronger connection to.
And he actually seems to care about Ford--he actually gave him a birthday present, and when Ford didn't like it, he decided to get drunk and party with him instead to make up for it.
And then when Ford realizes what Bill's plan actually is and refuses to go along with it, and fights back no matter what Bill does, Bill completely breaks down.
After living for trillions of years, he met someone who was like him, and that person rejected him.
He goes berserk, wreaking havoc, being caught by the dimensional authority that he's been taunting for most of his life.
And then after dying and being cast out of hell for being too annoying, he winds up faced with the Axolotl, who sends him to therapy, where he continues to break down further, sending out the book in a desperate attempt to find someone, anyone who will help him break loose and wreak havoc once again.
"You have no friends, and if you died ... who would even miss you?"
I don't know, Bill. Who would even miss you?
In short,
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[ID: The front and back of one of Bill's Valentines cards. On the front is a black void with Bill Cipher lying down without his hat, gazing blankly upwards, with the text "I DON'T WANT TO DIE ALONE" above him. On the back is a simple white "TO/FROM" in red, with a red outline illustration of Bill spontaneously growing a mouth and eating a realistic, bloody heart. /end ID]
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psilactis · 9 months
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I'm so tired
#Realized these past few weeks that people just.... Don't believe I'm feeling like shit#Like. I'm basically suicidal#I haven't said this to anyone#Not explicitly but I've hinted at it#What I have said however is that I feel like I'm in very real danger of being physically harmed in my current living situation#And that I live closed off in my bedroom to avoid interacting with my abuser#And that it would help immensely if I could just hang out with my friends you know?#Just get out of the house#See human beings that don't drive me into a panic attack by just existing in the same room as me#But everyone basically treats me like I'm insane for being afraid#No one invites me for anything#Everyone is always busy when I seek company#So I just become more and more closed off#I'm in such a depressive funk I'm barely trying to talk to anyone anymore#I just don't have the strength#I'm basically off the radar in every social media and chatting app.#And even the people who I've reached out to and asked for help haven't. Realized#Or cared#I'm so tired of trying to keep going. What even is the point anymore#A few years ago my first therapist told me we aren't supposed to be sad. Not all the time. Not like this#And at the time that gave so much hope that things would get better#But now a days it just freaks me out because it doesn't feel like I will ever be able to feel anything but this.#To exist in any way but this. Alone. No conexions. Only interacting with family who hates me wants me dead or resents me#This isn't even bringing all my health issues into account#Therapy isn't even helping#I'm thinking of quitting#I can only see the money going away and no improvement at all#Personal tag
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yawnderu · 4 months
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For Simon, there's something oddly alluring about the way you crumble beneath his touch. The way his rough hands seem to leave an invisible trail of electricity on your smooth skin, quickly becoming addicted to the way your back arches, soft lips parted as your moaning rises to a crescendo, Simon's wide hips keeping you in place as every single inch of his thick, drooling cock slams in and out of you at an almost sloppy pace, too pussy-drunk to focus on anything other than the way your body feels so right in his hands, on the way you react to every single touch.
A deep, shaky breath makes its way out of your lips, hot air kissing Simon's skin, only adding to the heat rising to his cheeks from how perfect you look in that moment, the thin layer of sweat coating your body and your tits bouncing up and down with each thrust, keeping him entranced as his hips move purely out of muscle memory, too familiar with intimacy when it comes to you.
Simon leans down, planting open-mouthed kisses all over your bouncing chest, the feeling of the shaking fat nearly forcing his hips to stutter before he gets a hold of himself, wanting to be as close to you as possible, even if only for a few more minutes. His warm tongue sneaks past his lips, capturing one of your nipples into his mouth, licking and sucking like a man starved, basking in the sound of deep, cropped breaths escaping through your teeth, always so reactive to every single thing he does.
Your arms encircle his behemoth frame, draping over his broad shoulders, feeling his muscles instinctively flex beneath your touch, never one to shy away from the effect intimacy has on him. The moment your head leans down, Simon gets the hint, his cracked lips crashing against yours as he keeps abusing your fucked-out cunt, swallowing every single one of your needy, whiny moans.
A shaky breath leaves his lips, already feeling his core tighten despite his best attempts at dragging it out, his tongue wrapping around yours in a battle for dominance that you instantly forfeit, the feeling of his bulbous tip slamming against the spongy entrance of your cervix not giving you much of a chance to think. Your eyes drift down below, fully focused on the ring of your juices wrapping around the base of Simon's cock, his dark, unkept happy trail glistening with your slick.
“Cum f'me, pretty.’’ Simon's hoarse voice whispers in your ear, ramming in and out of you at an almost unlawful pace, one of his hands reaching up to grasp your tit, using your own body as leverage to fuck into you harder, his lips coming back to yours like a magnet, wanting to feel every single inch of your perfect body beneath him, quivering in pure bliss.
Your walls wrap tighter around his cock, pulling him deeper —if it's even possible—, his mouth muffling the high-pitched, whinier moan leaving your lips the moment you cum around his dick, coating his veiny shaft with slick. He thrusts into you one last time, his muscles tightening up before relaxing as he comes undone, ropes of hot, thick cum shooting into your cervix.
His large body nearly collapses on top of you in the aftermath of his orgasm, though he's quick to catch himself, supporting his own weight with his arms. There's nothing but pure reverence in those half-lidded brown eyes, admiring you even when the energy drains out of him at a rapid pace, his thin, pink lips planting a soft kiss on your forehead before he slowly pulls his softening cock out of you, a string of his thick, white cum keeping you connected until he lies besides you, wrapping his burly arms around your exhausted frame, your face resting against his warm chest.
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youryanderedaddy · 4 months
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tw: female reader, non - con, sadism, hinted abuse
I'm thinking about the sweet sadistic type.
The way he pins you down and folds your body at whatever angle is convenient for him, completely disregarding those pained little yelps that tear your throat, or so you think. In reality he finds your broken gasps incredibly hot and would do anything to force more out of that cute little mouth despite your protests.
When you're so much smaller than him it's hard to see you as anything more than a defenseless plush toy - impossible to control the cute aggression that overtakes him at the sight of you when all he wants to do is pinch your cheeks and squeeze your thighs red, leaving fingerprints all over your body. He wants to bite your neck, to suck at your sweet spot for so long it stops being pleasurable and becomes unbearable instead - wants you to push at his chest and kick his legs just for the real helplessness to set in your brain.
When he takes you, he makes sure you're stretched, but never enough for it to be painless. Your captor finds sick satisfaction in the way your walls hug his cock all the way to your cervix, tight pussy throbbing in a pitiful attempt to adjust to his massive length - stretching you beyond your comfort. And when you finally cave in and give him those beautiful tears he loves so much, he's the first to caress your hot wet cheeks and kiss your puffy eyes. You're doing so well for me, sweet girl. Just bear with it for a bit longer. But it's never just a bit. He keeps rutting into you for hours, getting rougher and faster with each impending orgasm while you keep falling in and out of sleep, every time waking up to a sinister, lovesick gaze and a hand around your throat. Every time he's thrusting just a bit deeper, making your body jump and twist like it weights nothing.
He loves leaving bruises on you, although he would never admit it out loud. You look absolutely beautiful when you're bare before him, bashfully trying to hide the striking, undeniable proof that you're all his - the blue hickeys on your collarbone, the purple spots across your ass and thighs, the red marks all over your tits. It feels him with so much pride he always ends up pulling you in and kissing you with teeth, leaving a thin trail of blood down your chin. The things you do to me, baby. You really know how to set me on fire.
Still, he thinks you're the prettiest when you're crying. When he has just hit you and your cheek is burning, or when you hear your parents' names on the radio, and you let out those big, pearly tears, when you let your voice out after fighting your misery for so long. Shh, come here, babydoll. I know what will make you feel better. I'm going to give you lots of love until you forget about those pests from your past. Just try not to scream so much this time. You remember what happened last time, right? I would absolutely hate to see you hurt.
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onepureangel · 2 years
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i finally was able to tell my partner abt my hypersexuality and my eating disorder ,, which felt nice to talk abt but i also feel kinda guilty ? and idk where thats coming from
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sunderwight · 2 months
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SV scenario where Shen Jiu is also Shen Yuan's Meimei.
Trans egg SJ never got to examine her gender identity very much in her first life. What with all the enslavement, abuse (given as well as received), misunderstandings, betrayals, dismemberment, and death, there was far too much for her to ever come to terms with a set of concepts she'd never really had the luxury to entertain. By the time Shen Jiu was a peak lord, the Shen Qingqiu persona was locked in, and any dreams of a different life or inclinations to the contrary of her role were ruthlessly quashed by SJ herself.
But when SJ finally dies and her soul is free to reincarnate (taking a few more memories than usual along for the ride), she has mixed feelings about being born as the youngest daughter of a wealthy family.
The mixed feelings don't actually last long, though after a while she starts to wonder why the fates would grant her a reprieve? Maybe remembering her past life is her punishment, because it's certainly the worst part of her new situation. Her parents are indulgent, her older brothers all dote on her and spoil her, and when she tests limits she's only gently rebuked if she gets rebuked at all. Not only is she allowed to wear fine dresses and look pretty, she's expected to (actually the expectation does chafe, a bit). But even when she uses foul language, skips classes, reads controversial books, and commits myriad other tiny rebellions, no real retribution ever comes of it.
Even despite everything, after some years Shen Jiu starts to become... not complacent, but perhaps calmer would be a better description. She has a stable future handed to her on a silver platter. Very few things remind her of her past, either. She can read books about snotty highborn lords getting railed by werewolves as readily as classics of literature or academic papers on science, business, culture, politics, or whatever else takes her fancy. Her family doesn't even put demands on her to marry, despite some of her mother's hints in that direction. For the first time, Shen Jiu has a life where it seems like she can't fail, she can only succeed however much she wants to. It's like having nowhere to go but up, except without the part about hitting rock bottom.
A foolish set of assumptions, in the end. There's always something to lose.
When Shen Yuan suddenly dies, Shen Jiu recognizes the sinister hand of the same entity which oversaw her own reincarnation. One which had visited her dreams quite recently, trying to tempt her back to her first life with offers of being able to change the past. It wasn't even difficult to deny it. Shen Jiu doesn't believe she could change what happened, and she doesn't really want to try. Her one regret is what happened to that person, the one who died so horribly while rushing to her rescue, and even that, she doesn't know how she would change (because she still doesn't know why he bothered in the first place).
But how dare the System God take the silliest and softest of her brothers to try and fix her accursed first life?! Luo Binghe will eat him alive! Cang Qiong will mistake him for a demon or a madman or worse, and throw him into some cell somewhere, if they don't just kill him outright!
Shen Meimei tries to negotiate with the System, but it tells her the window of opportunity for her to go back instead has passed. Smarmy piece of shit. There's nothing she can do without supernatural help, however, except bide her time and wait for another "window of opportunity". It's in the midst of this that she discovers PIDW, and its (terrible) account not only of the broad strokes of her first life and death, but of what came afterwards. That little beast really wrecked the world, huh? And all those women, too. She's never been more grateful to have not figured herself out in her first life. But at least with access to this information, she can try and prepare more. (She's suspicious of who actually wrote this account as well -- is Luo Binghe himself in this world? Better to leave it now, in that case, before he inevitably makes another bid for power and destroys everything in his wake all over again!)
When the System finally gives her an opportunity to go back (as herself, or rather "Bonus Epilogue Side Character -- Shen Qingqiu's Mysterious Little Sister!") she is braced for any number of outcomes. Shen Yuan could be dead. He could be imprisoned. He could have had his limbs all cut off. He could be stuffed into a pickle jar. He could be hiding or on the run somewhere. Hopefully, he'll be hiding behind that person, confused and distraught but still intact thanks to the sect leader's guilt-driven sense of obligation. Most likely if the same number of years have passed since Shen Yuan "left", he's already been destroyed by Luo Binghe and all Shen Jiu will be able to do is avenge him. But she has some ideas of how to kill the beast, so, she will.
Of course, what she finds is nothing she expected, and almost even worse.
Luo Binghe married her brother?!
Death is too good for him! Shen Jiu's going to skin him alive!!!
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urdepressedslut · 1 year
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You’re Mine, Sunshine (masterlist) ♡
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♡ Pairing: Grumpy!Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Fem!Reader (Mob!Au Bodyguard!Au)
♡ Series Summary: Bucky gets picked by a very rich and respected man to be his daughter’s personal bodyguard. The Father warns him that it won’t be an easy job, that she is a brat and difficult to deal with. But what happens when Bucky meets you and you’re the complete opposite?
♡ Series Warnings: mentions of amputation, dark themes, violence, death/death threats, talk of parent death, fluff, angst, stalking, daddy issues, anxiety attacks/panic attacks, abuse, depression, depressive episodes, PTSD, dry humping, hints to smut, (warnings to be added as new chapters are released)
Trope ⇢ Grumpy x Sunshine ☀️
(SERIES ONGOING)
Last Updated: 9/8/23
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT | SERIES 18+
⇨ Chapter One
↳ After Pierce interviews Bucky for the job, he warns him of you. Bucky is starting to rethink his decision, but when he meets you... you're not what he expected.
⇨ Chapter Two
↳ Bucky takes you home, and later finds you in the library. You both get to know each other a little better, but Bucky is hesitant.
⇨ Chapter Three
↳ Bucky has a surprise meeting with Pierce, getting informed about your secret admire. Meanwhile, Bucky tries to keep things professional, he’s hesitant to cross the line when you need him.
⇨ Chapter Four
↳ You don’t know what to think of Bucky after he took you to bed last night. Bucky can’t continue to keep the stalking situation hidden from you. Something is found on your doorstep.
⇨ Chapter Five
↳ Getting to know each other better doesn’t go according to plan. Bucky has to comfort you and fix the mess he made. Will you forgive him?
⇨ Chapter Six
↳ Bucky receives a morning visit from Steve, with the news about what was in the box. Bucky continues to think about what he should do. Should he tell you the truth about your stalker?
⇨ Chapter Seven
↳ Bucky finds you making a mess in the kitchen, attempting to bake and offers his help. The two of you get to talking and some reveals about each other begin to come out. Will he finally tell you about your stalker?
⇨ Chapter Eight
↳ After a surprise visit from Pierce, tension arises as he threatens Bucky of his job. Pierce wants to have a talk with you and it doesn't go very well.
⇨ Chapter Nine
↳ After the events from the other day, you try and cope with the reality of what happened. The world is a lot less colorful than you remember. Bucky helps comfort you after you realize you have no one left.
⇨ Chapter Ten
↳ Someone comes knocking at your door in the morning. Bucky answers and is surprised with who he finds. Are they going to help them or hurt them?
⇨ Chapter Eleven
↳ The tension can't be ignored anymore between you and Bucky. Steve shows up and he's not alone.
⇨ Chapter Twelve
↳ Reality is hitting you as you, Bucky, Steve and his men all venture off to a secret safe house only Steve knows about. The events from the last couple of days are starting to hit you with a sickening force, leaving you weak and crippled.
⇨ Chapter Thirteen
↳ Your dreams consist of random memories of your parents, but are they really random? Despite the past days of hell—you still find it difficult to resist Bucky. You two spend a heated morning together, devouring each other while you still have these moments.
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tempest-toss · 1 year
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coconut pineapple— do you have any nicknames? and, is there anything you’d want to change your name to? Ten!
Sure I do!
Pix, Puck, Pi, Pipi, nerd, scrawny, and a few my parents gave me after I developed my anomaly.
Uhm, there isn't any name I'd like to change it to, I think Pixel Matrix is a great name.
--Ten
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luveline · 6 months
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You mentioned in one post that bombshell!reader was furious with the team for not helping Reid with his addiction (as she should be)…. Would you maybe write about her helping him thru withdrawal or thru the cravings that follow? Maybe subtly at first, then just making sure he knew he wasn’t alone? Just some tender moments where Spencer starts to realize she actually cares about him, even if he doesn’t believe her flirting yet.
-🌕
I love every single thing you write, even for fandoms I’m not even in. You’re amazing!!
thank you for requesting my sweetheart!!! I really hope this is what you wanted, love you <3 fem!reader
cw past drug abuse
“Hi, Spencer Reid.” 
You perch on the edge of his desk with no further introduction. You’ve changed perfumes, to his immediate recognition, the rich smell of your usual parfum swapped for a less consuming scent. He detects apple blossom, and rose, the smallest hint of jasmine, a contrast to your usual vanilla and peony. The human brain can remember 50,000 scents, and Spencer can remember all of yours. Or, he could. 
“You’re not saying hi anymore?” 
“Hi, Y/N.” 
“Hi. It’s nice to see you.” You put your hand on his. Spencer isn’t sure you’ve ever touched his hand before, he’s never really let you, but he doesn’t move away. A huge winding of tension between his shoulders begins to unspool. “It’s really nice to see you, babe. I’ve missed you tons and tons.” 
He looks up tentatively. “You have?” 
“I have. I haven’t really been invited, today. I’m just here to see you.” 
“Why?” Spencer asks. 
You tighten your fingers on his hand. “Missed you. Thought maybe we should, like…” And that’s unusual, for you to use filler words, Spencer doesn’t know what to think of it. “Well, I have something to say to you, and it’s going to either sound reassuring or ridiculous.” 
“Okay.” 
You give him a withering look. “Don’t make it any easier for me.” 
He laughs. The sound alone fosters your smile. “Sorry,” he says softly, “I doubt it’ll be ridiculous.” 
“Spencer Reid, we are friends. We are. But we never do anything outside of work, so I was thinking you could come over tonight and we’d make dinner and watch TV and stuff.” 
“And stuff.” 
“I’m a bit nervous,” you confess, looking down at your lap, then quickly back up into his face, “I’m worried you won’t want to.” 
You’re kind to avoid saying what he’s sure you’re thinking; you’re worried he won’t want to spend the night with you, and instead will look down the long barrel of a small needle. Or, he thinks that’s what you’re thinking. He does it to everyone. 
“What do you want to make for dinner?” he asks. 
“What are you enjoying lately?” 
“I… I don’t know. I’m not really eating.”
“Cereal?” 
“Yes,” he laughs. “Lots of cereal.” 
You tap the wheel of his chair with your heel. You’re dressed as though you aren’t working, wearing a sweet dark dress with a starched collar and baby sleeves, stockings, and a necklace at your neck that glows with a small white crystal. You look amazing. It never makes any sense to Spencer, why you’d taken an interest in him, and why you bother now. He knows he’s hard to care for. He knows he’s making it worse. 
You look up and down his face. You must see the purple half circles beneath his eyes, the crack at the corner of his mouth, the cut he can’t stop picking on his cheek. Every time it scabs, he opens it again. One second he’s sitting there and the next he’s got blood under his fingernail. 
“Hug?” you ask hopefully. 
He goes to stand. You move in too fast and wrap your arms around him, leg slotting between his, leaning over his shoulders with a distinct sense of protectiveness. You squeeze him, a little sigh escaping you that sounds loud so close to his ear. 
“How has it been this week?” you ask quietly. 
“It’s fine.” He cups your back in his arm carefully. The other wraps tight around the small of it. He soaks you up, scared you’re gonna pull away any second. 
“How are you feeling about it? Do you need any extra help?” 
He cringes. “No,” he says. “It’s really fine.” 
“When you texted me, about the cravings? What are they like today?” 
He wishes he could breathe in the smell of your perfume and your skin and tell you they’re all better now. It would make sense; there isn’t much in his life that hasn’t been made better by your attention. He’d struggle to do this without you. You’re his only friend who actually cared enough to say the problem out loud, but you’re just a woman, you can’t work the sort of magic necessary to kick this for him. 
“Spencer?” You pull away, nudging his cheek with the back of your finger. 
“They’re okay. I’m not gonna do anything.” 
“Good, honey. I’m proud of you. I know how hard this is.” 
He bites the inside of his lip, surprised at your caring. He shouldn’t be.
“What are you two whispering about?”
You and Spencer have different reactions to Emily’s sudden question. He flinches like he’s been caught with his hand in the cookie jar and you, still vaguely pissed with everyone for not telling you Spencer was struggling and not afraid to show it, keep your eyes trained on his face. 
“Nothing,” Spencer says. 
You turn to her with a small smile. You still like her, Spencer knows. Secretly, he’s pleased you’re angry for him. It’s nice to have someone so obviously on his side. “We’re just deciding what to get for dinner.” 
“Oh, nice. Date night?” she teases. 
You press your cheek to his forehead. “Date night,” you agree, your hand unmissable where it bunches in his sweater near his heart. 
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