#him picking up on her accent is bc we know he's good at this in canon!

[teatitty]

Okay so I'm generously calling this the Dandy Guardian AU until I think of a better name but essentially this is the rundown [had to put this under a cut because it got long WHOOPS]:

In the book version of events, Dandelion isn't present when Geralt is in Cintra and calls the Law of Surprise, but he does know about what happened. I can't recall if we ever see that convo in text or if it's just background knowledge but that's not important right now

When the Fall of Cintra happens, Dandelion already has his ear to the ground, the walls and the crowds to follow Nilfgaard's movements - Oxenfurt's bards are the best bet anyone has for gathering information about the invading armies because they are spread so wide around the continent and have so many connections

Dandelion's first thought is not to send word to Oxenfurt about Cintra's fall. His first thought is Geralt, and his blasted Child Surprise. He starts tracking his way to Cintra, hoping that he might be able to cross paths with Geralt in the surrounding territories to assure himself that his friend didn't get caught in the middle of that Fall

Meanwhile, Ciri knows she has to find a Witcher by the name of Geralt. She knows he is her destiny. She has no fucking idea where to start looking for him, but she's on the run from Nilfgaard, terrified and anxious and stressed, and in her bag, to her surprise, she finds a well worn copy of a hidden book of Dandelion's poems, all of which are to do with Geralt's adventures. Mousesack had given it to her in secret when she was six, and it had been one of her favourites ever since

She quite forgot she had it in her bag

Cirilla has no idea where to find Geralt. But Dandelion might. Dandelion, she thinks, is her best bet to track her own destiny

And of the two of them, Dandelion isn't a very hard man to find. His bright plumage and singing laughter leaves an easy trail of rumours and tracks to follow. Curiously, whenever she asks about where she might find him, people don't tend to question her. They look at her with sympathy - and sometimes pity - and ask if she has anyone else she can rely on

"No," says Ciri, sombre and trembling. "I only have him."

It's not a lie, exactly, and she's gotten quite good at hiding her aristocratic accent. They point her to when they last heard of his presence. They ask if she needs any help. She thanks them for it, because she is still polite, if angry and confused and oh-so-very lost, but she declines any further company

She goes on.

Every night, she opens up that little book of poems, and tries to imagine what the man described in them is like. It's the closest thing she has to knowing Geralt the Person rather than Geralt the Cursed Witcher

Cirilla is three weeks' worth of travel out from Cintra's borders when she finds Dandelion. It's a little more accurate to say she's dragged over to him - apparently, a blonde, freckle faced child asking about such a famous bard is a quick titter of gossip in the grapevine, and she quickly discovers why it is that nobody ever asked her why she wanted him, and always looked with sympathy or pity at her plight:

Dandelion's hair is blonde. Hers is paler than his own, but he is blonde, like her, and his eyes are bright and clear. His face, though worn and tired, is fair and freckled just like hers, and he is just as surprised as she is when she finds herself shoved in front of him and announced to be his "illegitimate daughter"

"Whoever you got unlucky enough to knock up," says the other minstrel who guided her, "the poor lass seems all alone now. From what I heard, you're the only thing she's got left in the world."

Whatever the minstrel says next is lost to her - for a few aching moments, Dandelion looks panicked. And then something shifts. His face softens. "You look dead on your feet, darling," he says. "Come on, lets get you upstairs and clean you up a bit."

Cirilla doesn't trust strangers. Oddly, Dandelion doesn't feel like one. Perhaps because she has spent so many nights reading his work. Or maybe it's because he's a friend of her destiny. Either way, she quietly follows him up to his room, and when the door is closed, he says, "You don't know where Geralt is, do you?"

Ciri does not.

Her lip trembles. Her shoulders shake. When she finally heaves a sob, Dandelion does not crowd her. But his hands are gentle when he moves her cloak from her shoulders. His voice is soft as he brushes her hair and hums a quiet song

Dandelion never met Pavetta in person. But he once saw her in a painting, and he's seen plenty of Calanthe's likeness over the years besides. Ciri looks a spitting image of them both. Privately, he's impressed at how well she could hide her accent. But she is still just a child, and Dandelion has much more experience with putting on such a performance. He's worn many a different mask with many a different voice over the years, and he had heard traces of her native Cintran beneath the roughness of her croak

Cirilla is alone. But she is also alive, and Dandelion knows, with a confidence born of years by Geralt's side, that his Witcher would never let himself die before finding this girl safe

When the morning comes, he begins to take her North

[h0tb0x1nnac0ff1n]

Very excited to see your page grow ! 🤍 sorry for the long request 😣😣❕

Can i request a Daryl x fem!reader where the reader’s whole love language was cooking for people before everything went to shit? But because to the outbreak and where they ran from place to place.. she just could never make anything and because lack of ingredients which sort of kills her morale.

However, when they’re staying at Alexandria.. One day she gets one look at their pantry and is strangely super excited and very much productive for the whole afternoon. Which causes confusion among the group because “woah reader is rlly happy, wonder what’s up.” And it’s because she can finally cook the food she loved to make and it’s now time for Daryl to test-taste each and every single dish made all with her love 🤍 .

Just some wholesome fluffiness bc i personally imagine Daryl had like food made by someone for him. He deserves the best as he just eats everything up bc its made with all of our love 🤍🤍🤍

Hello!!! I think this is an amazing idea! Can I just say that I’ve found my people 🤧

Here’s to my first X Reader on here 🥂

Warning: Talks about food/ fluff/ killing walkers (normal TWD stuff)

HOPE YALL ENJOY❤️

You a chef or something’?

For as long as you could remember, you always loved to cook for the people closest to you.

You would make them their favorite foods and the look on their faces when they would take that first bite was enough to make your entire day.

But when everything happened, cooking food that actually tasted good was the least of your concern, breaking your little chef heart. But when you walked into Alexandria for the first time and saw the plethora of food they had, your heart practically sung.

“What type of herbs do you have?”

“Just about everything, basil, thyme, rosemary, paprika. You name it we probably have it.”

“Where did you get all of them?” You said with a little giggle in your throat.

“Out scavenging, this area used to be a huge neighborhood so there was lots of herbs and seasonings that were left behind”

You were so excited for all of the possibilities! You could make so many different foods and you can now FINALLY show off to everyone how much you loved to cook. But there was one person who you especially wanted to impress.

He sat outside of the house cleaning his bow you and Rick’s group had decided to stay in until you could trust these new people.

You walked up to the house with a huge basket of cans, herbs, seasonings, and just whatever you could put into a meal.

“What gotcha all skipping down the street like a child?” the bowman said with his southern twang, an accent you been hearing since you joined the group back at the quarry.

“Just some herbs and seasonings”

“Whatcha gonna use tha for?”

“Uh, cooking?” You said in a questionable tone.

“Do you want me to cook you something?”

“Nah, you don’ gotta do tha. Whatcha gonna make with all of those anyway?”

“I have lots of ideas on what to make, you know it’s been a while since I cooked, maybe you could come inside and taste everything?”

Daryl gave it a second of thought, but in his normal gruff voice “Fine, but you gotta cook what I ask for”

“Okay!”

Ever since you first met Daryl and the quarry you always thought he was a hard working man. Always went out and got food. He was a survivor, a man the world couldn’t take down no matter what it threw to him.

When he saved you after the walkers invaded the camp, you began to not just think he was a cool guy but also to have a sense of respect for him.

“What do you want me to cook you?”

“Well, I got this squirrel that I plan of skinning, be nice to do somethin with it.”

And that got you thinking. “Maybe we could do a stew, or a baked squirrel, or maybe-“ “Woah, calm down ther’ just make a stew that’ll be simple enough all righ’?”

“Okay, a stew. Hmm.” You go inside the house and walk to the kitchen placing down the basket, and you start looking at the seasonings, and vegetables in your basket. You pick out the cucumber, carrots, squash, flour, and eggs “How many squirrels do you have?”

“I got five”

“Okay, I can make a broth from the squirrels and make a minestrone soup”

“The hell is a minestrone soup?” “It’s a soup from Italy, filled with vegetables.”

“Well okay, tell me when it done”

You gave him a big smile and turned around to get started on this soup, you had Daryl skin the squirrels for you, you baked the squirrel and toon of the meat, then placed the meat in a bag and put it in the fridge for the stew. You then got the bones and some meat from the squirrel, put it in a pot filled with garlic, carrots, onions, and you put it to the top of the got with water. Then you let it cook on the stove top for HOURS.

The next day you strained the broth and started on the soup. You chopped up the vegetables and you made the pasta. Using the flour and eggs you used 3 parts flour, and 2 parts egg. You than mixed with your hands and used a rolling pin to flatten it out. Daryl than came up to you to check what you were doing “Why ya just now startin tha?” “I had to make the broth, that took all night.”

“Ya didn’t have to do tha it justa soup I woulda had you make me somethin else if I knew it would take that long.”

“Don’t be an ass Daryl I’m doing this because I care.”

“But why do you care, why do ya care about the way food tastes n all tha, it jus ment for ya to survive.”

“I know, but mankind invented art, and I believe cooking is an art. You deserve some good food after everything you do, just let me show that I care.”

“Fine, just stop being philosophical.”

“That a big word even for you Mr. Dixon.” You joked.

He just scoffed and walked away. ‘Finally some peace to myself’ you thought. You loved that man you do but sometimes he can just get in your nerves. But you know he’s an ass out of love.

One hour later, the soup is finally now just simmering in the pot. You decided it would be a good idea to make a cake because you think Daryl might appreciate it for taking so long to cook the soup.

You ran down to the little ‘Grocery store’ they had down the street and picked up some sugar, butter, and vanilla flavoring.

You devoted to them start on the cake, also making your own butter crème frosting. After two hours, everything was perfect.

You decided to set up the table and piped open a glass of red wine.

“Daryl ! Dinners ready!”

Daryl walked slowly into the house to see you dressed in a beautiful floral summer dress and some fake pearl earrings from the mall back when you were in the quarry.

“Wha’ with all this?” He asked not knowing how to react. All he knew was this beautiful woman whom he adored had made him a meal that smelled sweeter than anything else.

“I thought you would enjoy it, so I decided to get some wine, and the nicest bowl I could find”

“Well, tha’ sweet of ya, wish I dressed up a bit more now.”

Daryl was wearing what he usually does, his t-shirt with his beautiful arms showing, with his angel wing vest and his cargo pants with boots.

“You look just fine Daryl, not like we have many clothes anyway.”

Daryl silently agreed and sat down

You served him the soup with a slice of buttered Italian bread and a glass of wine.

You sat yourself across from him and Daryl instantly started to eat.

“Oh wow-“ Daryl’s face looked as if he had never eaten before.

“This the best soup I ever had”

“Are you messing with me?” Daryl had never really given many compliments to anybody, so him saying so ment a lot.

“I’m serious, the carrots are nice, ion think I ever had squash before so that new.”

“Aw well thank you Daryl”

“Nah thank you, so tell me sunshine” and nickname he had given to you that just made your heart flutter.

“Why is cooking so important to ya?”

“I think it just the feeling that, I can make people happy, that I could make them something and they would enjoy it.”

“Mm” he replied nodding.

After dinner you and Daryl had a slice of the cake you had decided to bake last minute, he also said that the cake was and I quote “Fucking amazing”.

You two decided to hang out and talk while you both cleaned up the kitchen.

“Hey Daryl.”

“Ya what’s up sunshine?”

“Do you think I could cook for you more often? I mean I hope you liked it”

“Woman, I loved your cooking, imma be coming over every nigh’ now.”

You were so happy to hear that, Daryl actually loved your cooking. You felt so happy you couldn’t hold back your smile, making your face a bit red.

Daryl smiled and continued wiping down the table.

After that you decided to go to bed, Daryl had decided to as well, but he slept downstairs still.

You kissed him a goodnight kiss on his cheek and walked up stairs. Thinking about the day, Daryl fell asleep with a smile on his face excited for what tomorrow will bring.

.

.

.

.

.

.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING!!!!! So sorry if it shitty but thank you all for reading my first x reader on this app 🤧 ❤️

[sant-riley]

Okay yk what idc I got alot of thoughts of Puerto rican! Reader with the boys, I am not sorry, I need to get this out of my system. so I'm giving her the codename of Teddy :) sorry if that ruins the immersion!

General hcs/thoughts I have with the boys from mw2:

Ghost could destroy an entire pernil by himself. He actively looks forward to it every single Thanksgiving despite him literally not being American and thus doesn't celebrate it. "L.T, don't tell me you're going over to her house just for some pork." "Why yes Johnny, I am." He is not sharing with a single soul, he will break someone's fingers. (Teddy makes him his own at this point so the others can have a try)

Soap fucking chugs Coquito like it's nothing, bc technically it isn't compared to the stuff he has back home. At first he was apprehensive but now he usually goes home with a bottle. He will share but if he sees someone wasting it he will be pissed. It is hard as fuck to come by in Scotland if not the base.

Price very much enjoys the cleaning playist Teddy has, she told him how growing up that that was how her mom told her it was time to get her ass up and do chores. He finds himself playing it early in the morning while he does documents to wake himself up.

Everyone's favorite song round let's go

Soap's favorite - Suavemente

Ghost's favorite - Anhelo (totally not bc he danced with her to this one)

Price's favorite - Danza Kuduro

Gaz's favorite - La Vaca

Alejandro being surprised when he sees a short Hispanic woman with two big ass European men. "Tu con estos dos? de donde eres chiquita?"

Soap fucking pushes himself in and answers for her, a smug little smile from all the little Spanish he picked up. Ghost just rolls his eyes and tries to not groan. Soap being a showoff.

The solidarity between the Vaqueros and Teddy 🤝 different countries but there's alot to have in common.

Teddy cursing in Spanish at the top of her lungs and Alejandra and Rudy snorting. "You kiss your grandmother with that mouth?"

The boys have in fact danced with her when she's feeling homesick, each one. Soap and Gaz don't mind doing it in public where as Ghost and Price rather do it in their rooms/her room. Ghost and Price will say its good exercise but we all know the truth.

When fresh food is available, they'll ask her to make the food she eats off duty. It's different combinations of rice and beans, along with meat always.

Everyone fucking devours tostones btw. Literally they have to buy so many plantains to make sure everyone has their fill or there will in fact be a fight.

SHE MAKES THEM HELP MAKE PASTELES!! It's a whole assembly line. Christmas is a war zone in of itself trying to make the shits.

Ghost drinks Cafe bustelo straight out the machine. No one else can stand the stuff bc it's too strong.

When sofrito has to be made, everyone makes Soap cut the onions lmfao, the worst part of the entire process.

Everyone starts to saying spanglish around base, Gaz switching from English to accented Spanish is a interesting sight 😭 Teddy mocks him as if she isn't to blame.

THE WAY GHOST SAYS NUEVO IN RESPONSE TO LEAVING ALEJANDRO AND HE GETS FLAMED FOR IT BC THATS NOT HOW YOU SAY OF COURSE.

"Really? Nuevo? Do you know what that means?" "Oh for fucks sakes."

Okay I'm tired and my fingers hurt from typing all of this lol I'll add more probably at some point!

If you'd like to be tagged in future works, please comment under my rules that are pinned to my blog!

[verfound]

FIC: "I Have Your...Cake" (MLB; Lukanette; LBSC Lukanette Month 2024)

@lovebugs-and-snakecharmers is doing a Lukanette Month for September 2024, and we all just kinda tossed some prompts in the disco to compile a list?  We ended up with 71 prompts, so I decided I’d roll some dice to pick a prompt, do a twenty minute (ish, bc we all know sometimes they run away from me) sprint, and try to get some short fics out this month?

(Rated M for Bachelorette Party-style shenanigans)

Read on Ao3

05 September 2024

Prompt 27: Opposite

The man who answered the door was the exact opposite of what Marinette had been expecting, going from the pictures.

For one thing, he wasn’t blond.  For another, he wasn’t…he was…that is to say…

He had a face, for one.  The pictures she had been sent for ‘reference’ were not of her client’s face.

(…but she wasn’t sure you could actually dye…where the pictures were, so again: she had thought the client was blond.)

And from the few phone calls they’d had – because most of the correspondence had been through Rose, because she didn’t normally do this sort of thing but Rose was a dear friend and she was doing her a favor – she hadn’t expected him to be so…well.  Cute.

…which was an entirely unfair thought to have, because this man was getting married the next day – she was holding the baked proof that he was very much getting married the next day – and was definitely not someone that Marinette should be considering ‘cute’.

(…panty-dropping, Alya would probably say, because good Lord those eyes and shoulders and…down, girl.)

“Yes?” he asked, and if her brain had still been functioning she might think it weird that his voice sounded deeper, too.  Less accented.  Less manic.

The voice from the phone had bee grating at best.  This voice…oh, she could spend hours listening to that voice.  She wondered what her name would sound like wrapped in it.  How other things would sound wrapped in it.

…she was perhaps just a little gone, which, going back to the fact that he was completely and utterly unavailable, was a big problem.

“Mademoiselle?” he asked, and she shook her head as she (mostly) came back to her senses.  She was making an absolute fool of herself – she had to get it together!  She straightened her back and thrust (…goddammit phrasing!) the bakery box out at him.

“I-I-I have your penis!” she actually yelped, and dear God just kill her now.  There was a beat that passed between them as her words seemed to sink in, and then his eyebrows were lifting into his hairline and an adorable little flush was coloring his cheeks and Down, Girl!  “I-I mean  your cake!  Your penis cake!  The cake of your penis!  For your party?”

He blinked again as realization seemed to sink in, and the flush on his cheeks grew darker as a strangled little chuckle left him.  She groaned and hung her head.

“…kill me now,” she moaned.  She glanced up at him, her head still bent over the box, and bit down on her lip.  If she hadn’t been in the middle of dying from mortification, she might have noticed the way his eyes seemed to focus on that.  “I am so sorry.  That was so unprofessional, M. King.  It’s just…I didn’t expect you to be so hot.”

His eyes widened again, and she almost dropped the cake.  She jerked up, her back ramrod straight, and squeaked.

“I-I mean cute!  Attractive!  I mean you’re not – you’re taken!  Engaged!  Affianced!” and God, now she was rambling.  Why wasn’t he stopping her?  Why was he grinning like that?  She groaned again and pushed the cake out a little more.  “…please take this and put me out of my misery.”

“…I think I like your misery,” he chuckled, his voice sounding more than a little strangled, but he still took the cake.  He winced as he glanced at the box, distinctly not opening it, and put it on a table behind the door.  He turned back to her with an easy smile and folded his arms over his chest as he leaned against the frame.  “And for the record.  If it makes any difference.  I’m not M. King.”

He glanced back at the box as she sucked in a breath, his eyebrows furrowing.  His expression turned wry as he looked back at her.

“…that’s not seriously a cake of his junk, is it?” he asked.  She nodded, and he grimaced.  “I was really hoping he was joking about that.  Bri’s gonna hate…shit.  Fuck.  Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

“…sorry?” she squeaked, her eyes widening again.  He turned back into the flat, his expression suddenly furious, but she was more than a little distracted by the way his ass looked in those jeans.

“Dingo, you jackass – you didn’t actually order strippers for your party, did you?!” he shouted, and her eyes grew even wider.  Ordered what now???  When no answer came, the man’s jaw clenched.  “I am not going to jail for you, asshole!”

“…um…” she coughed, and he jumped as he turned back to her – like he had completely forgotten she was there.

“…shit.  Sorry,” he said, shaking his head.  “It’s just…Dingo – the groom – is a fucking moron.  I didn’t think he’d actually ordered the stupid cake – his fiancée, Bri, told him multiple times she didn’t want it, but he kept joking about…”

There must have been some kind of expression on her face – there had to be, from the heat she could feel filling her cheeks and the way her eyes were stinging – that made him wince and look away.  His hand came up to rub at the back of his neck, and his own blush had spread to the tips of his ears.

…he had no right to be that hot and that adorable.

“…sorry,” he said again, wincing.  “That’s…that’s not actually your problem.  Sorry.  They…um.  Fuck.  They paid you, right?  For the cake?”

“Y-yeah,” she said, nodding.  She cleared her throat and nodded again, a bit stronger.  “Yes.  I was just dropping it off on my way home.  I…sorry.  So you’re not Dingo, then?”

“God, no,” he laughed, shaking his head.  He held out his hand, his smile softening.  “Luka.  Luka Couffaine.”

“Oh!  Juleka’s brother, right?” she asked, snapping her fingers.  He lifted his eyebrows.  “The musician?”

“You know Jules?” he asked.  His hand was still held out awkwardly between them.  She nodded.

“And Rose,” she said.  “We’ve been friends since collège.  I’m Marinette.”

“Oh, right!  The designer!” the man – Luka – said, nodding.  “They talk about you all the time.  It’s nice to finally have a face to put with the name.  Your parents are bakers, right?  Is that how you ended up making…”

He glanced back at the box, and she giggled nervously.

“Rose and Juleka are really good friends, and I never turn down a good friend,” she said, shrugging.  “…even if it makes me really uncomfortable.  I’m chronically helpful.”

“Your stuff’s incredible,” Luka said.  He rolled his eyes and smiled.  “Never thought I’d say this, but I’m almost looking forward to eating Ding’s junk now.”

She choked on a laugh, clapping her hands over her mouth, and his smile grew.  When she had better gathered herself, she looked up at him with an almost giddy smile.

“…hey, are you doing anything tomorrow?” he asked.  Her eyebrows lifted, and he grinned.  “I’d love to…well.  I’d love to buy you a coffee, but I’m kinda supposed to be in this wedding.  I may have promised the groom I’d be his best man.”

She giggled at the way he rolled his eyes, and his smile grew.  He dipped his head towards her.

“Care to be my plus one?” he asked, grinning.  “I’m told the cake’s going to be amazing.”

She choked on another laugh.  She knew it would be – her parents were making it.

“Isn’t it bad form to invite someone to a wedding for a first date?” she asked.  “Besides.  I’m already going to be there – I have to help the bakers set up the cake.”

“Perfect!” he said.  Something moved in her periphery, and she noticed he was wiggling his fingers at her.  He was still holding his hand up between them.  “You have to be there.  I have to be there –best man, remember?  Why not be there together?  I’d say I’d buy you a drink, but it’s going to be an open bar.  Maybe I can buy you some cake instead.”

“…the cake’s free, too,” she laughed.  His grin grew.

“Perfect,” he said.  “You can buy me cake.”

He wiggled his fingers again, and she rolled her eyes as she raised a hand to clasp his.  She was momentarily dazed by how…warm his hand felt around hers.  Like it was made to hold hers.

“It’s a date,” he said, squeezing her hand.  Her smile warmed, and she nodded.  Suddenly she didn’t really care if it was bad form, asking someone to a wedding for a first date.

“I can’t wait.”

[saintship]

GAZ COMING HOME TO A SURPRISE PARTY FROM YOU AND HIS FAMILY AND MAYBE EVEN A PROPOSAL OR PREGNANCY ANNOUNCEMENT BC HES A GOOD BOY WHO DESERVES GOOD THINGS PLSTHX

YOU GOT IT❗️❗️❗️

Warnings: lovey dovey, swearing, kissy kissy, proposal

Warm welcome - Gaz x Reader

The kitchen calendar made you smile; partly because Gaz insisted on keeping up with them, marking and annotating and doodling in the margins, and partly because you’d been waiting for today’s date for eight months.

The deployment had gone on for much longer than it was supposed to, which was normal, but you couldn’t help the nights you spent sitting by the phone or sifting through photo albums, the images of his face the only thing you could focus on. And, he could only tell you so much; all you knew was someone on the task force needed to be rescued, and it took more than one try. Gaz told you your FaceTimes were the only thing keeping him steady. He’d also made a bold stroke in your relationship; asking his mother to call you personally.

She’d called when you were nodding off after pacing the kitchen late into the night, picking at your takeout and furiously cleaning the countertops. When your tears started rolling, the phone rang. The unknown number made you think of the worst; you picked it up in a panic.

“Is he okay?” You asked breathlessly, one hand resting at your head to steady yourself.

“Sorry?.. I might have the wrong number, is this..”

The way she said your name caught your attention; Gaz had a certain lilt to his accent that you found so cute; and now you’d heard it from the source.

“Yes..”

“I’m Kyle’s mum.”

You leaned against the kitchen island, your breathing steadying. “Hi..”

“It’s nice to hear your voice, I wish he would have brought you home last holiday.”

“He talks about me?”

A gentle laugh answered you. “Darling, he doesn’t stop.”

You blink, folding one arm under the other as you began to feel a warmth in your chest from the gesture, Kyle talking about you to his mom..

“And anyway, he gave me your number, he knows how late you stay up and wanted to make sure you had someone on the line.”

The warmth burst into a brilliant light of admiration and love for your boyfriend; he knew he couldn’t always be there, and instead of only offering an apology, he furthered your involvement in a different way.

“I- that’s..” You huffed, smiling through the dried tear streaks and headache that plagued you.

“Ma’am, I- I love your son more than I can say..”

“I’d hope so.” She replied easily.

You laughed again, your worry fizzling into a low flame.

You spent three hours on the phone that night; though it felt like minutes. You learned about Kyle; how he was during primary school, how he would dress as a differently ranked soldier every Halloween, and picked up every flyer he could to enlist out of high school. She had been terrified, of course, no mother hopes for her son to be a soldier, but she supported his job anyway. It was something you shared; a love that overpowered your fear of the worst outcome.

“What do you usually do when he arrives?”

She’d been asking how you were feeling about him coming home in a few days, if everything went to plan, that was.

“I uh, I make dinner, you know, usually I get his car washed and waxed or something nice like that for him to come home to. He loves that thing more than me.”

“He better not!”

You laughed together for the umpteenth time.

“But.. we could plan something with more people? I’d love to spend some time together in person, and you can bring anyone you like..”

“That would be amazing, darling.”

So, a few days later, Kyle’s mother and father, brother, sister, grandfather and aunt were helping you pin up streamers and a ‘welcome home’ banner, fixing a large meal, and yelling at the TV as their home city struggled in the latest aired football match.

Before they had arrived, though, you’d gone to a family-owned jeweler for a nice watch to gift him with. Skimming the rows of silver and gold plated pieces, you thought about looking somewhere else when you wandered near the ring cases. What began as pure curiosity built into a warm image of you revealing a small box, pouring everything in your mind into the room, and fitting the ring onto his perfect hands before kissing his stupidly perfect face. One band in particular was a shiny tungsten ring, stronger than steel and with a smooth, silver finish. You didn’t think, you just swiped your card.

Now, that ring sat in a velvet box under your pillow, where you examined it each night, anxiety stirring in your stomach. Was this the right time? But you couldn’t think about that now; he was almost home.

“He’s pulling in..” You murmur to the room when you spot him through the blinds, and you rush to stand near the doorway. The sound of keys jingling nearly made you break your cover out of excitement, but he pushed the door open, and the room erupted in cheers of surprise, the ‘Welcome home’ banner in the kitchen glittering in its gold letters.

His eyes widened and blinked in surprise, looking between his family in you with a disbelieving laugh. You took him in your arms, melting in the sensation of him squeezing you back just as tight as his family cooed at the gesture.

“You did this?” He murmured near your ear.

You kiss his cheek that’s facing away from his family.

“Me and your mom..”

“Oh, hell..” he stroked your cheek, his brow drawing together in further disbelief.

You led him, smiling, to the kitchen for him to hug his family next, your heart bursting when he lifted his sister in the air with the momentum of his hug.

“This is mental..” he murmured as he wrapped an arm around you again, looking around.

“You’ve got a gem, Kyle.” His father spoke earnestly.

Kyle turned to move a piece of hair away from your eyes. “Yeah, I know..”

“Big softie!” His sister teased loudly, grinning.

“Sod off..” He threw a crumpled napkin at her, making you smile at the exchange.

The dinner was amazing, but you could have eaten anything with them and enjoyed the experience. It felt like you’d stepped into a beautiful other world where you just felt right. Having him next to you, let alone in the same room, was elating after being separated from him for so long, and you couldn’t help but always be pressed against him in some way. Linking a finger, resting your leg against his, touching shoulders, anything to feel the warmth you’d been craving for the better part of a year.

When it was time to say goodbye, and the last guest closed the door behind him, Kyle kissed you deeply, holding your face delicately with both his hands.

“You’re unbelievably, incredibly, amazing..” he murmured against your lips. “Missed you so fucking much, babe..”

His accent was thicker when he spoke so honestly, and it made your head spin. Or maybe that was how he kissed you like you put the sun in the sky.

“Missed you more..” you pulled him into a close hug, nestling your head into his neck shamelessly.

“You tired?” You ask quietly.

“Yeah..” the slight guilt in his voice made you pull back slightly.

“Kyle, I get it, I promise. Let’s go to bed, baby..”

He let you lead him to the bathroom where you brushed your teeth together before changing and slipping under the covers. Your head pounded as you partially hid your hand under the pillow, clutching the small box so tightly it might have bursted if you hadn’t taken in a steadying breath.

“You alright?” Kyle traced your knuckles with his hands; he was sitting up slightly, his hat taken off along with his shirt, and the soft lamp light just lit up his eyes in the most adorable way..

“I have a question.. it’s- important.” You shifted slightly closer.

“Is everything alright?” He rephrased his question slowly, worry growing in his gaze.

“I’ll just.. show you first..” With a quick exhale, you pulled the box from underneath the pillow, gently separating your free hand from his to open the top. His eyes grew wide.

“Sweeheart..”

“I’m so in love with you.. every time I talk about you, or hear you, or see you—think of you.. I’m just so gone it makes me look stupid. I want to spend my life with you, and I want to give myself to you. Because that’s how I would feel right, and safe. With you..”

You breathed deeply.

“Kyle Garrick.. will you marry me?”

His jaw might as well have detached, because his mouth had been hanging open for half of your deceleration.

“Y-yes! Fuck, yes!” He scrambled to sit up fully as you slid the ring on, taking the first opportunity to smother you in a hug and pepper your face and neck with kisses. “I love you so much..”

Tears of adrenaline and joy stung your eyes as you laughed breathlessly.

“I love you more..”

[ameliora-j]

happy twisted tuesday!! okay this might sound rly weird but imagine stepdad bf (could be anyone) x innocent reader who’s in highschool and he picks her up from school and then parks in the middle of the student parking lot and rails her… omg and a bunch of guys walking by and they see the foggy windows and shaky car and reader keeps riding bc it feels too good and she loves her daddy- i’ll stop now 😭

i made her a grad student bc the high school thing made me a little uncomfortable :')

���𐑂 it’s twisted tuesday ! send in ur dark au requests :>

content: stepcest, stepdad!sonny, age gap, established relationship, unprotected piv, size kink, praise kink, breeding kink, DARKFIC, THIS POST IS 18+ MDNI

𐐪𐑂 𐐪𐑂 𐐪𐑂

you smile as you see the big, black svu that belonged to your stepdad. you skipped over and climbed into the car. "hey, doll face" his staten island accent rang out. "how was your class?" he asks

"hi daddy" you smile, kissing his cheek as you fix your skirt. "school was alright. is work going okay?" sonny was amazing. he started dating your mom when you were a sophomore in college, and married her when you graduated. you and sonny were close, given the fact that your mom was never home and both of you were studying law at fordham. it didn't take long before you and sonny began to develop a physical relationship.

physical developed into a loving one very quickly. how could you not love him? he was the epitome of an angel. "works goin alright, it's work." he sighed. "you want any lunch before i take you home or did you eat on campus?" he asks, beginning to pull around the building and into a parking lot.

"i could eat" you smile softly "where are we going?" you ask curiously as you look around the parking lot.

"i need you to help relax me, doll" he says "can you do that for daddy?" he asks. you smile brightly, bobbing your head in a nod. you would do anything for sonny. "there's my good girl" he smiles, cupping your jaw before giving you a soft kiss.

you smile softly as you kiss him back, gently holding his jaw. he hums softly as he pulls back before climbing into the backseat. "c'mon, doll" he mumbles, patting his thigh. you smile as you climb back with him, straddling his lap and going right back into your kiss as you grinded down on his lap.

he lets out a throaty groan against your lips, gripping your hips as if his life depended on it. he moved your hips for you as you kissed down his neck, his bulge growing against your center, causing the wet patch on your panties to grow as you moaned against his skin. "c'mon doll, ride daddy's cock" he orders, patting your ass to get you moving.

you nod quickly, undoing his belt and pulling his cock free from his black suit pants. he moans quietly as you stroke his cock, his head falling back against the seat. you pushed your panties aside before slowly sinking down on him. sonny's wet lips parted slightly as you slowly sank down on him. "it's so big" you whine as you slowly begin to bounce on him.

"oh i know it is, baby. but you take it so fucking well" he grunts. his thumb finds your clit easily, rubbing gentle circles on the swollen button as you rode him slowly. "you're doing so fuckin good for daddy. takin his big cock in your slutty little pussy" he grunts, gripping your hips tighter as he bounces you on his lap. "i love the way you stretch around me baby. squeezin me so fuckin tight" he grunted.

the car began to shake with the force of your bouncing, windows fogging as the car quickly became humid with you and sonny's heavy pants. you could hear the sounds of people walking past the car, but you couldn't bring yourself to care. not when sonny's cock was pressing perfectly against your gspot and his relentless thumb on your clit was beginning to send you spiraling into seventh heaven.

you moan loudly, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him into a sloppy kiss as you rode his cock. "'m gonna cum, daddy" you whine softly. "please i need to cum so bad. wanna milk your cock. feel your babies filling me up." you babble.

sonny groans loudly, gripping your hips tightly before beginning to pound up into you. skin slapping on sin combined with your loud moans providing a beautiful symphony for sonny's ears as he approached his thigh. "i feel your little pussy gripping my cock, baby. cum for me" he orders lowly in your ear, not once faltering in his thrusts. "soak your step daddy's cock with your cum baby. and i'll fill you nice and good with my babies. get you nice and round with my seed" you gasp at his words, moaning loudly as your hips falter. you cum hard, absolutely creaming his cock as your body shook on his lap.

you distantly registered the sound of sonny swearing loudly before you felt his cum coating the walls of your pussy. you whine loudly, falling into his chest as you come down from your high. you press yourself against his chest, listening to his beating heart as he rubbed your back gently.

he helped you to come down before you both fixed yourselves and crawled back to the front of the car. "so..." sonny began, rolling down the windows to clear the flog as he began pulling out of the parking lot. "pizza or burgers?" he smiled charmingly at you.

[demonir]

I spent all day yesterday with my mom talking abt a lot of stuff but amongst all those things she let me intensely infodump about tf2 for hours and I got to show her a lot of things, here are the highlights of me showing tf2 to a white uruguayan 53 year old woman who’s only game experience is bejeweled

I first gave her a very surface level rundown of the game plot which she found nonsensical the more questions she asked, I showed her the meet the merc vids first and at the end of each I gave her extra info about them

She thinks heavy is interesting and she’d probably like him more if he was put in a normal situation where he’s just a civilian living life, she never made a fat joke abt him so lets fucking gooooooo 👍👍👍👍👍👍

Her feelings on scout are mixed and didn’t like when I said he was one of my favorites, she said I need to like smarter people (this will be her downfall later) she did like him a lot more after we watched Expiration Date and found him and Miss Pauling endearing (she was great at picking up the subtext which surprised me) also asked her what age she thought scout had and she said 19 or 20 😭 then made a joke abt his baby face when I told her his actual age

Engineer scares her a small bit and does NOT understand how he’s my number 1 favorite (it was so hard to pretend I am normal about him in front of her) thinks him playing the guitar with a glove is stupid. I explained to her a bit of the conagher family story and she said that dell basically got the short end of the stick (because he’s tasked with fighting in the war AND maintaining the australium immortality devices when australium ran out) 😭

Thinks sniper is okay, I asked her what age she thought he had and she said 50 LMAOOOOO when I told her his actual presumed age she went “oh damn then I’m doing GREAT for my age”. I went on a huge tangent about the comic’s timeline and plot just to explain to her how he’s not ACTUALLY australian and she got sad abt him :( I did not tell her abt the jarate until a lot later bc I knew it would irredeemably ruin her image of sniper, I explained to her the game mechanic and as I was going to say “it gives the enemy a negative effect” she cuts me off and goes “yeah it makes them die from embarrassment” she also made a jarate pun in Spanish that I can’t remember at all rn I’m so sorry

Did not understand a single thing demoman said in the entire video and I don’t really blame her, her English is not good or that advanced it’s quite strange because she can understand some random complex words but had to ask me what “screw you” means so yeah she didn’t understand demomans accent she did however notice it was the same voice actor as heavy. I told her about demomans background and story and she found it so incredibly strange but wished for him to recover from alcoholism because it’s not good for him 💜 I told her abt demomans charms but she wasn’t quite charmed herself sadly (she did enjoy him in emesis blue)

Like mother like child, the Meet The Spy video was her favorite out of the bunch and she very quickly clocked in on the fact spy is scouts father without me saying anything, she said that from a technical standpoint spy is the most valuable mercenary on the team (goddamn not even the medic got considered) she also enjoyed him a lot in Expiration Date and Emesis Blue, I think hes still her favorite as of right now. Also we watched lil pootis and she laughed SO hard when I told her blu spy divorced blu ma and got with blu engie. She also frowned when red spy left lil pootis in the hallway alone and made jokes about mistreating his grandson

She did NOT like meet the medic or medic himself, absolutely creeped out by him and when I told her medic is one of my favorites she looked at me and went “your concept of what’s “comedic” and “fun” is very wrong and I hope you never get a boyfriend because I’m afraid of what you’ll bring home”….. I don’t know if she was serious or not 😭 I also never mentioned liking medic that way but I guess she fucking clocked me for it anyways. I tried to give her some medic propaganda and she found him tricking the devil to be very funny, I haven’t asked her if her opinion on medic has changed after watching emesis blue tho (I’m very curious to know since it’s a very different interpretation of him) I haven’t told her a single thing about heavymedic because I am afraid of what she’s gonna do with the knowledge of tf2 ships and I’m probably gonna keep it that way. She did seem charmed by the way medic genuinely loves his doves since she’s an animal lover herself

Soldier scared her a bit but mostly confused her, her initial reaction was rejection because of his ultra patriotism, nonsensical lines and violent tendencies however he grew onto her rather quickly to even make it to like second or third place on her list of favorites mainly because I told her about his raccoon sanctuary and the fact he is a great boyfriend (I didn’t tell her abt the naked honey fighting… I’ll show her later) and a great friend to demoman as well (she finds their cross faction friendship adorable)

Pyro absolutely TERRIFIES her she was utterly horrified by the meet the pyro video and doesn’t know what scares her more, the idea that pyro doesn’t know what they’re doing or that they do and do it anyway. I didn’t get to tell her abt pyro becoming a CEO in the comics but I’ll mention it eventually, the interpretation of them in emesis blue probably did not help her be less scared of pyro lmao. Also she thought the baby mercs in the meet the pyro video were oddly adorable and wants one….whatever that means

Overall she said the age of the game shows itself in the videos with their quality and what not and I also told her they were animated using SFM and briefly explained how it’s a free software fans have used for years to make fan content. Also she thinks the blu spy head in the freezer is the FUNNIEST shit ever

Her thoughts about Expiration Date:

She noted how this was obviously more recent because the quality was better

When she saw scout asleep in the van she went “that’s how I sleep”

She picked on a lot of details that I didn’t think she would and actually hearing her thoughts about the video after was rather fun, she did note how scout had used what he learned from spy later on the fight against the bread monster with miss Pauling for example

Nearly screamed when the bread monster ate the dove and let out a sigh of relief when she saw it was ok

Found scout very endearing when he explained he knew girls like Pauling don’t like him

The bit with the bucket made her laugh out loud I had to pause the video because she was curled into a ball laughing

I had failed to explain that they have teleportation technology in tf2 so when she saw the teleporters she loudly went “what the FUCK is that”

Loved miss Pauling a lot in fact before watching this video she asked me if we were gonna see her at some point since I had already spent a while talking abt her earlier

She didn’t have a lot of comments about other stuff I showed her that are worth mentioning but she loved emesis blue! She’s like me about liking weird confusing movies so that part she loved a lot but could do with a bit less violence, at one point whenever the characters were in danger she’d cover her face and go “they don’t die do they?” Over and over again lmao

I plan on showing her more stuff although it’s slightly difficult bc of the language barrier, if y’all have any videos or stuff you’d like for me to show her plz share but be aware of that

[wish-i-were-heather]

okay so im halfway through the gandest game!!! (spoiler warning up to chapter 42)

i already gave my thoughts up to like 24 so im just gonna continue from there (literally copy and pasting off of the doc i have where i just write my thoughts as i read)

I’m 100% on the theory that Odette is Alice Hawthorne because how would she know Tobias????? I mean sure she could have some other past with him but idk I feel like that’s her

“Gigi didn’t get to fall apart” (118) um ma’am do we need to talk are you okay gigi? I feel like at some point we’re gonna have a scene where she breaks down and omg what if Grayson comforts her that’d be so sweet

I’m gonna jump Knox. Not in a good way. 

TALK NERDY TO ME????? (121) NO WAY THAT WAS A COINCIDENCE  THAT HAS TO BE A REFERENCE

“Make yourself useful, British” (123) Wow Savannah really getting creative with these nicknames

Ok but I keep forgetting Rohan is British and has a British accent which only makes him 100x hotter

Omg just kiss already

I love how Lyra is like no he can’t pick me up “she already knew how Grayson touch could linger, how it’s ghost refused to be exorcized” (136) honey no that’s not him he’s only doing that bc hes in love with you 

SHE REWATCHED THE KISS?? GIRLLLL WHATT I would’ve too tho NOT BC AVERYGRAYSON BUT BECAUSE GRAYSON IS SO FINE and i'd want him to kiss me 😔

Odette is like us she so ships them omg I kinda love that for her “you hands, her hips” (137)

GRAYSON CAN PICK ME UP ANY DAY OMG I GOT FRICKIN BUTTERFLIES READING THAT SCENE DIHSISBSJSBISJD

“I need a moment” (138) Grayson honey we all know why you really need that moment but please try to focus on the game and be horny for Lyra later okay?

I kinda ship Gigi and Brady tho. I never liked this slater guy so honestly I’m not complaining

GRAYSON HAWTHORNE ADMITTING HE'S WRONG??? If Jamie was there he would never hear the end of it

The way that Brady and Knox talk about this calla person reminds me of how book one Jamie and gray would talk about Emily but like different ofc

OKAY IF BRADY AND GIGI DON'T BECOME A THING EVENTUALLY I WILL RIOT BECAUSE WDYM HE LOOKS AT HER THE WAY JAMESON LOOKS AT AVERY?? IDC IF HES JUST LOOKING AT THE WORDS ITS MORE THAN THAT-

SAVVY??????????

“I do not care what words people use to describe me, because those people are all beneath me” (163) SAVANNAH GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS GRAYSON OMG

Wait after readint the end of chapter 41 what the heck is up with knox??? Obviously he and brady have some sort of history but why’s he being like that???? Im really confused and honestly a little concerned. Whats up with him and small spaces, some sort of trauma? But also like he makes me feel unsafe 

WAIT SHE PRESSED THE WRONG BUTTON? Its okay tho shes just a girl 🎀 

Ok wait brady and knox’s history together???!!! Does that explain why knox was like that when brady said his mom had cancer? Still don't like knox tho like what

[br4tphobia]

Now sis you know you gotta give us the ☕️ on how last night happened!!!

GIRLLL. i got dickkkeeddd all the way deown!! 🙈🙈🙈 but this is what happenneeedd

ok so as soon as he step through the door we hug riighttt, then he says i smell good, like bby it ain nun new but tyy. he did too oml 😖 but yhh he askin me hru and shi and i do the same, im leadin him upstairs to my lil palaacee 🙈🙈 music was already playin the led lights was on toooo🤞🏾🤞🏾 he said “damn u really set the mood” i saaiiiddd “i js wanna have a good time” i smiled at him too, he told me i had a nice smile im not letting it go to waste !! 🙈🙈 so i lay down on the bed and i feel his hand on my ass im like sir..

but anyways i pass a controller to him bc im tryna chill first and he took it, we played a injustice 2 for a bit and he said “who wins, chooses the other person a piece of clothing to take off”

it was corny as shit but i agreed so we playedd and guess who won.. him. 😞 he told me to take off my shirt and i did blah blah he saw my tattoo and said it was pretty cool, he won again and i took off my shorts bc he said sooooo, i won this time and im telling him to take off that shirt bc i cant get over his chest tat omggg 😖 he won again.. ☹️ aannnddd the underwear haddd to go. 😕 so ms.bertha (my p$$y 💁🏾‍♀️) was js out.

“change of plans, play by urself. see if u can focus.” idk what he means until the match starts and i feel his fingers pushin against ms. bertha.. like you just awoken her, ain no goin back.

so he start fingerin me and lord. i put the controller down bc he know what he’s doing!! but he stops. 🧍🏾‍♀️ “focus” im whining bc hello? i’m tryna get fingered and u stoppin.. but yk i picked that damn controller up and started playing again but now he kissin on my damn neckk, “if you win, you dont need to worry bout allat shit.”

that pissed me off but hey. the dick was worth ittt!! so blah blahh i won and i laid the fuck back and let him finger the shittt outta be while he tonguing me downnn. hes such a good kisser 🥹

skip that shit now he inbetween my thighs. 🙈 when i tell u, HE KNOWS HOW TO EAT SUM PUSSY. oml i didnt wanna grab his hair bc what if he dont like it? but then he says “u can touch me” so i took that opportunity, i kinda tugged on it accidentally bc it felt so gooodd and bro like whines kinda!? omg. that woke me all the way up bccc 😫 bro would not let up either i had to push that mf away!! 😭

im sensitive bc i came like twice already and now im js jerkin him off while we kissinnn and then he pulls away then smiles. U GOT ME READY TO RISK IT AAALLLLLLL. cuz u still playin wimmie? ☹️☹️☹️

but yeaaa he asks for consent i said yh he slides it in and says “shit you’re wet.” oh baby ik but girl. GIRL. he filled me right tf uppp, he waited a while then he started moving and lemme tell u. ooo chile im hooked onto him!! 😖

im over here moanin n shit, soundin smexxyyy and omfg. bc tell me why this mf sounds so pretty. hes like quite kinda but you can still hear him grooaaannn ☹️ lord he was pushin down on ma stomach n urr thang, bro put my leg on his shoulder too!! oh u goin deeeppp 😖 but we wasnt in missionary long before he let me ontop, first mistake. 🙈

put that hang in reverse and took my joy ride (u get it 🤓😭😭😭) , bc lemme tell u. this nigga slaps hard as hell . AND I MEAN IT. bro slapped my ass mf hard i still saw the print when i looked in the mirror. LIKE HELLO?

oml the accent. THE MF ACCENT.. ugghg bc why is he sayin “just like that princess” HE CALLED ME PRINCESS THE WHOLE TIMR HE WAS THERE oml ☹️

so im doin my thanggg, spellin coconut with my waist a few times bc thats what really got him🤭🤭 touching all up on me i tell u 😓 thenn i lean down on the bedand threw that shit tff backk!! oml no bc i was abt to cum right so i told him, i swear when i came this nigga is talking me through it omfgg! “there you go princess” “let it out” SIRRRR. his voice was so soft im telling you!! i love me some men with nice ass voices. 😩

so we still goin and im sensitive asl so im getting loud and he is with me 🤭🤭 yk blah blah blah he nutted on my ass 💁🏾‍♀️💁🏾‍♀️ we kept the position and he put face down ass up after i had anotherr orgasm

and he fuckin my shit up oml. he told me to keep my arch i swear i could nOTT. he had to push on my back!! yk he nuts a few times i do too blah blah and swear i was on the verge of screaming when he slowed down, like he was still strokin my shit so good but slow as helll. my nigga.. he fucked me so good i called him daddy 🤭 he made me repeat that shit too like sirr. 😭 now he in my ear tellin me “nut on this dick” “you can do it” “cmon princess gimme another”

shii i did!! 🙈🙈🙈 and guess what? he nutted with me 💁🏾‍♀️🤞🏾🤞🏾🤞🏾

trust me this was so much longer than written but he after careddd, made sure i peed blah blah

he was watching tiktok before he started kissing on me again and slid my panties deoowwnnn, he hit it from the side yk thatt i got a grip on him the way he sayin my shit so fat 🙈🙈🙈

we both came blah blah same thing every round, we rested for a lil bit

i asked him if he could take me downstairs but i was just joking!! so tell me why this nigga fr carried me downstairs.. 😛

we spent a lil time together, crackin jokes before he came up behind me, hiked my leg on the counter yawwpp, but we had to stop bc his food was done. 😒

he asked me if i was hungry but i wasnt any more bc i fucked up some cheezits

but yh we went back upstairssss and talked for a while before he laid down he woke up around 3 and already touchin on me 😞 but my friend was right we stayed like that for a while until he wanted to start playin with ms.bertha.. 😛 yk i give in immediately bc he knowsss how to use his fingers real good 😫 that middle and ring inside + the thumb ontop combo zont play!!!

ykk im pressin my ass on his print bc he got me so needy and for what? he got my face down ass up again and a notification popped up which showed my friends message, and me told me to reply.. 😞 and obviously, i did. liv u can see that 😭😭 but bro threatened to stop like no sir u gon keep goin.. ☹️

so yeppp after that i immediately fell asleep omg. he did too but guess who woke up firstt 🤭🤭 big valerie!! i wanted to brush my teeth first bc i found it a lil nasty to do that a dirty mouth. 😒 luckily he ain wake up and yk i craawwwlll under them sheets and got the fuck to work!! 🤭

he woke up and already grabbing on my head n shii. im deep throating and strokin his balls or whatevaa, got him moanin and cussin. 💁🏾‍♀️💁🏾‍♀️ he told me he was abt to cum and yk i js stroked him bc i dont got time to be havin literal kids in my mouth..but i do for them to be on my lips!

u said my lips was attractive? oh worrddd? bet. 😩 my lips was on his tip right im trying so hard not to smile bc lord the hold i had on him!!! 🙈🙈🙈 he buss all on my shit, licked them lips and he kissed me right afterr 😁

he asked me if i would be ok by myself, i told him yh bc im not tryna have my roommates see him 😭 ugh i wish he staayyyeeeddd. ☹️ but yk he took a shower and i washed his clothes 🤞🏾🤞🏾

anddd bae left around 12 ☹️☹️☹️ his tongued me tf down before leaving too like sir dpwm i will take u right back upstairs 😒

THATS IT 💁🏾‍♀️💁🏾‍♀️💁🏾‍♀️ @luvliv4lifexoxo here girl!! hope u woke ya ass up

[ageless-soul-au]

got a curious question about the heroes— what languages can they speak? or understand in case they can't speak it for whatever reason?

Most of them just speak Hylian and Hylian Sign (bc sign language is considered a different language bc it has different structure and grammar even tho we don't write it out like that) but here are the heroes that we know are at least a little multi lingual.

Legend could call himself a fucking polymath at this point. He knows Hylian and Hylian Sign fluently ofc, and can read/write Lorulean since it's the same as Hylian, just mirrored. He can read Mudoran but isn't sure about the pronunciation since it's a dead language in his time, and is at least conversational in Holodruman, Labrynnan, and Subrosian. He's very interested in learning Gerudo currently, so that might be another one added to the list eventually.

Cinder knows Lorulean fluently since he's from there (written Hylian was the real challenge for him but he got it).

Time knows some Gerudo and Gerudo Sign, probably just conversationally, but he's illiterate so he can't read or write anything.

Four knows Picori fluently bc of the jabber fruit.

Hyrule is fluent in Fey, though they shouldn't speak it around normal people if they want those individuals to stay sane.

Fae probably knows some Fey as well, just what she needed to for getting through her quest.

Twilight knows how to read Twili, and Midna has tried to teach him some, but he has trouble getting around his accent for pronunciation.

Wild knows Sheikah, both ancient and modern, and would like to know the Zora/Rito mother tongue but it's p much impossible for them to produce or even decipher what all those clicks and whistles mean. Sidon appreciates his little Hylian's desire to connect but it just won't happen and he thinks them trying (and failing horrifically) is very cute.

Odyssey is fluent in Gerudo! And he's probably trying very hard to learn Gerudo Sign, but not quite fluent in it yet. He can talk to his boyfriend in his native tongue and that's good enough for now. (And on that note, Legacy probably knows both Sheikah and Gerudo.)

Champion probably knows at least some sign for all the major races just in case. He takes his guard job very seriously, and being nonverbal needs some workarounds in case not everyone knows Hylian Sign. He doesn't wanna end up playing charades.

Wind probably has picked up some Rito birdcalls, both bc he's friends w Medli and Komali, and having an alternative to pirate code with Tetra can be useful. Nothing like. Truly substantial tho.

Sky has maybe like. Some Lanayru mining robot translations lying around in a book somewhere in case he needs it.

Wars knows bits and pieces of a certain language his mother used, doesn't think very much about it. He should maybe talk to Legend....

And that's about it! TLDR most of them know at least snippets of another language according to need.

-Kio & Mizu

[ursifors]

anyway taking a break from other aus because i've been thinking about my fallout au a lot lately! i'm currently building Eventer in fallout 4 to get pic refs but that'll take me quite some time. for now, an updated version of the au framework!

i wrote this: "since we have joe, bk, and ky now i have to add them! i think bk and ky were traveling together for awhile, both of them being from a recently opened vault. joe i think is someone from a different settlement that takes a shine to michael and follows him to Eventer." in a different post but i already want to change that so *scribbles over it* REDO god this au has so many retcons already

i had to read more this bc i started fucking RAMBLING

gavin is not a vault dweller, he is a mr. handy who was put into a synth body (like curie) this explains his british accent and also i think it just fits. i have a wip of a fanfic of them doing the procedure to transfer him into the synth body that maybe one day i'll finish and post here, who knows.

YOU KNOW I GOTTA ADD THE NEWBIES <33 it will be very hard for me to not make joe "guy who gets inexplicably attached to michael and follows him everywhere" in every single au i make but for this i think joe might be a vault dweller (for reference, jeremy and previously gavin before i retconned him were the only vault dwellers) i just think being a vault dweller can give you that kind of new baby but quickly learning the ropes feel that joe has for me still

bk is definitely a shop owner or caravaner that eventually just moved in because she made so many friends. she has such a big and friendly personality i really see her making a lot of social connections and being on good terms with most people who caravan or have stores. i think in eventer she runs a weapons store!

ky i can see as almost like, the unofficial mayor of eventer. she brings everyone together and makes the community closer! she's great at organizing events (heh) remembering important things about what the community needs or wants, ect. she isnt "in charge" as no one really has all the power, but i think her jack and trevor are the ones most respected and who people go to when they need a town wide decision made.

speaking of, i decided i wanted to have trevor and alfredo sort be what valentine is and make them detectives! i want to incorporate more red web vibes in my aus and fallout is a perfect place for that as there are canonically aliens and cryptids in the fallout universe, as well as. you know. murder and such.

as far as who lives together and their roles in the community the updated version would be:

michael and lindsay live together and run a general goods store and as such are involved in trade with other towns and farms nearby. lindsay is a ghoul in this au btw. because i couldn't not make someone a ghoul and i think ghouls are fucking badass so its them, as the most badass person in ah.

gavin lives alone but has several cats. he is the doctor and runs a small clinic out of his home.

jack lives alone and is the radio dj! mostly playing music but also settlement wide announcements when necessary and covering the news ect, like most fallout radio djs do.

trevor and alfredo live together and run a detective agency. when they don't have any cases, trevor builds stuff to help the community and alfredo picks up guard duty rounds as he is one of their most competent with a gun.

matt and jeremy live together! matt works with their livestock (which is just a handful of brahmin and also a radstaag they cant get to leave) while jeremy is more of the "main character" since i made this au because of him, so he goes off an adventures the most. of course he comes back at least every 2 days because of his cats! who if you'll remember, are an eye bot (zipper), a tiny securiton (booker), and 3 real cats.

bk and ky live together - bk runs a weapons story which i am electing right now to call Friendly Fire because thats their team name but also it FITS SO WELL OMG - anyway ky helps with this sometimes when she's not busy planning a cookout, or helping matt set up something for the animals, or giving jack news updates to talk about ect.

EDIT I FORGOT TO ADD JOE: joe lives alone and i think is the head guard like he patrols and keeps the town safe bc its very open. he also delegates patrolling schedules ect. cannot stress enough how he is not a cop tho. he is guarding the town from mole rats and raiders not arresting ppl for crimes.

[veilkeeper]

Tav questions for Serenity: 9 + 13 + 14 + 16 + 26 (can you tell i like color schemes) + 33 + 58

a rare serenity ask.... alright here we go, i'll do my best but a lot of this is going to be subject to change when i actually get around to his pt

(questions from here)

9. What is your Tav’s biggest priority or goal?

this is so interesting bc theres like, the goal serenity is working towards and says he wants, and then there's the thing he actually wants but does nothing about. pre-tadpole, he'd tell you his goals align with his father's - he intends to do as is expected of him. secretly, however, he wants nothing more than to be rid of the Urge. post-tadpole, he's more honest about his goals.

13. How does your Tav fight in a combat situation?

so. a lot of people build their durges as like. sneaky assassin types. and i get that, it makes sense with the whole god of assassins, murder in the shadowy streets of baldur's gate thing. serenity however is a bladelock with a big fuck-off sword. he can stealth, he just doesnt care to once he's in an actual fight. he's a bit of a show-off - he likes letting people know he's got tricks up his sleeve and he can and will kill them. he likes when people are scared of him and his power before they die.

14. Does your Tav know any other languages besides Common? 

i really want to say yes, but truthfully, probably not. he spent most of his life in the temple of bhaal and i just dont think they're doing language lessons in there.

(putting the rest under the cut)

16. Which of the companions does your Tav trust most? 

extremely subject to change when i start vibe checking people but i suspect serenity is going to gravitate towards people in the moral middle-ground. he'll like astarion but not trust him, he'll like wyll but not trust him. lae'zel is more loyal to her people/queen than she'd ever be to him, etc. anyone too good or too morally dubious will raise his hackles, and anyone with loyalties that might conflict with his safety will do the same. so i think the best candidates for Trusted Besties are shadowheart and gale. keep in mind that especially in the early days, serenity is (ironically much like astarion) picking who he's trying to tie to him as insulation for if that Ominous Bloodlust in his head ever becomes a problem.

26. What is the most prominent color in your Tav’s color scheme?

pre-tadpole serenity followed typical temple of bhaal dress, a lot of black with red accents. gortash could... occasionally... convince him to wear nicer clothes and when that happened he liked to experiment with different colours. he's already playing dress up, right? might as well be completely out of character. it's not like he likes it............ shut up. post-tadpole he wears whatever he wants, and i will have so much fun experimenting with dyes to see what colour i like on him.

33. What is your Tav’s relationship with their family?

serenity intentionally stomps down any memory of their foster family, he does not want to think about them. not because they were awful but because they were so good and theyre the only victims of his he's ever felt bad about (not that he'd admit it). that leaves orin as his only "family" and... i think he wants them to be friends. i think he wants them to not be antagonistic towards each other, he wants them to be a team. but their father constantly pits them against each other and orin fucking hates him for being the Golden Child, so instead he does his best to keep things as civil as possible while knowing he's going to have to kill her one day.

58. What decision would your party have to make in order for Tav to consider splitting off from the group?

short of grabbing pitchforks and going after him, nothing. serenity is taking all of his moral cues from the gang since he's pretty sure what he thinks is cool is... an outlier opinion. like he's not going to try to take the moral high ground anywhere, because he was fantasizing about finding a nice spot to watch the goblins and tieflings tear each other apart.

[the-cat-chat]

June 24, 2023

The Drop (2014)

Bob Saginowski, a barman, becomes entangled in an investigation after the mafia-run bar where he works is robbed.

JayBell: This was an almost blind pick on our part. I had never heard of this movie at all, but Tom Hardy is in it, so why not give it a shot. Plus, a crime drama is right up our alley.

First of all, Tom Hardy’s accent takes a bit to get used to. Aside from that, the persona of his character in the first part of the movie is like likable idiot? Disheveled himbo? Oblivious bystander? Whatever you want to call it, he really plays up this personality to make the ending more dramatic and shocking. It’s actually a pretty good move because it does work. Although the “big” twist at the end is heavily hinted throughout the movie, so I’m not sure how many people were actually surprised by it. With that said, it’s fun to see the change in his character at the end after seeing him bumbling along in the beginning.

The plot is solid and enjoyable, but I did think the pacing was slightly slower than I would like. Maybe that’s because we figured out the twist so soon and I was ready for “it” to be revealed and everything.

I did get frustrated with our romance in this movie. Well actually I don’t know if I would really call it a romance. It’s more like the potential of a romance. I like that they give our two characters a lot of interactions to build up a sort of friendship without going straight to the romance. Yet, in the end, I did want to smack our leading lady upside the head and ask her if she was serious. After all that happens, I honestly think maybe it would be a good idea for her to move on. Bob isn’t like the worst she could pick (especially compared to her ex), but I think she needs to get a new type.

Obviously the puppy is my favorite character.

Rating: 6/10 cats 🐈  

Anzie: Soooo this weekend was suppose to be a comedic reprieve from all the heartache we’ve endured. And last second having to find a new movie since The Princess had to be unavailable after we’ve talked about the possibility of watching it for months, would usually end in disaster for our unable-to- make-a-decision-selves. But heyyy, drama is close enough to comedy right? When it has Tom Hardy in it, riggght?? HBO also had it listed as a romance- which I get I guessssss. If I found a man in the wild that looked like Tom Hardy I could consider putting up with quite a bit, not this muuuch but some. Plus it was James Gandolfini’s last movie, and we all love a good crime movie.

So. This movie. I really liked it- the plot twists were amazing. And the actors were so good with how they made their characters behave and something ALWAY feels just off so you’re on the edge of your seat- it is for sure not boring. I have to say too even tho you pick up those weird vibes and think this is going to happen or this or that- it’s still fun watching it play out and very entertaining and very suspenseful. And can we talk about how cutttttteeeeee the pupper is?!?? Bc honestly I think he gives this movie at least 3 of its points just on his own.

That being said- even though I enjoyed it - there were moments I felt like that nervous laughter meme of Julia Louis-Dreyfus bc I was constantly like what is with Tom Hardy’s character- it was like unintentionally funny to me how he kept going on about this puppy when this huge deal about the Chechen’s money is going on. It’s golden.

My one complaint, wait make it two- first the weird ex- I know he had to be a part of it - but I don’t have to like it. And second- HOW COULD COUSIN MARV?? The movies definitely worth a watch and there’s a lot of good detail and great acting - I always have that problem of separating actors and the characters like that’s Tom Hardy or James Gandolfini playing someone - but this movie sucked me in and I was able to really just enjoy the story and the shocking twists.

Rating: 7/10 Pups 🐶

[springvaletales]

((Session 53 is here! Actually it was here last week but a lot’s been going on IRL so I only got it all typed up today.))

We’re all kind of braindead, Sir Carl Jaeger’s player can’t attend, and I’m fresh off an interview, so today is going to be all about Shenanigans and little else.

The party woke up at the Whitescale Inn, and Bagelby immediately offered to disguise Lex as an old lady so they could hustle strangers by challenging them to arm wrestle for coin.

Their first victim was Kwara, the pompous human leader of a group of surly teenagers who I described as “an antagonist from an 80’s fighting anime who starts as an enemy but ends the season as your ride-or-die best friend”

Bagelby had so much fun messing with Kwara that he forgot to pick the gang’s pockets.

Ena had planned on setting up her proposal to Asahi today, but Asahi now won’t leave her side, and she’s growing increasingly desperate to ditch her soon-to-be wife in an unsuspicious way so she can set up her proposal.

Thiori went off to find a library and some books about jewelry making, and found a small local library run by three overworked Kobolds who only just took over the library from an elf who had used a long and complicated organizational system that no-one else understood.

Somewhere in all this chaos, Sir Carl went off on his own.

“Are you supposed to tip your librarian?”

I underestimated how much Thiori’s Player loves Kobolds. He gave them all of his gold. Like, ALL of it.

Me: “Was that a ‘sad’ yeah? Or a ‘his mind expanded SO far that day ‘ yeah?”

Thiori’s Player: “Yeah.”

The party met up for lunch (Lex paid with all of the gold she and Bagelby, uh, ‘found’) and Lex was the only one who rolled high enough to spot a mysterious figure armored in white watching them from the rooftops across the square.

The figure shook his head at her like a disappointed parent, and then vanished in a blinding flash of white light.

Lex doesn’t know anything about the local history, but Thiori - who was given the customer service experience of a lifetime by his new Kobold worshipers - knows that the figure matches the description of Whitescale, a folk hero from the era of the Dark King’s fall.

The party decided to get to the bottom of the Whitescale Incident by talking directly to the Mayor....whose house is attached to the local Whitescale museum.

Mayor Twillhopper’s Tortle receptionist is from New Jersey bc that’s the accent I panic-chose and now I’m stuck with it.

Bagelby, excited: “Asahi, didn’t I do good? I didn’t even tell her what we did to the last mayor we met!”

Asahi, screaming inside: “That’s great, Bagel! Please do not utter any more words!”

Thiori wandered into a museum dedicated to the folk hero Whitescale, and met the Tabaxi Postal worker/museum guard Geli (who was more interested in a nap than collecting admission) and a 14yo anime protagonist.

“I refUSE to let Geli get fired.”

Meanwhile, Lex managed to lure the figure she’d seen into a dead-end alley before confronting him, and found him to be a 7ft suit of armor who told her to stop scamming people because it A) wasn’t nice and B) was going to cause more problems for him after she and her party left town.

Whitescale 2.0 clocked for Lawful Stupid.

Whitescale 2.0 also clocked for a ‘Robin, despite me using a DxD image as his reference.

Lex asked him about the Sunfell Cult, and Whitescale 2.0 admitted that the cult has been a growing problem in the town for over a year.

Whitescale 2.0 told Lex to meet him on the roof of the Lightbell Bell Tower after sunset, and vanished when her back was turned.

Back at the Mayor’s house/museum, Mayor Twillhopper is now “Disheveled Bowtie Daddy” (I never should have described him as ‘Bruce-Wayne-but-in-party-mode’).

Mayor Twillhopper has a custom-made wine glass that can hold an entire keg’s worth of liquid,

He and Sir Carl Jaeger have been drinking together almost the entire day. They are both very drunk.

He also has a built-in magical dispenser bar that slides out of the wall of his sitting room and can dispense just about any beverage you can imagine.

Bagelby tried to claim he was over 21, but failed his deception roll, and the Mayor (claiming that he knew what a teenaged boy looked like because he had one) offered him slug juice instead.

Asahi straight up asked the Mayor if he was Whitescale, which he denied.

She also straight up asked him how old he was, as he expressed surprise in hearing that Velenna had taken on a new student (Bagelby), and was told to mind her manners.

The Mayor’s adopted human son, Twyl Twillhopper (14), walked in in through a hallway to the attached museum, and tried to sneak past his father’s guests. He was unsuccessful, and his father called him over to brag about his budding magical prowess.

Bagelby and Twyl got into a magical pissing contest of seeing who could best imitate the Mayor’s appearance using Disguise Self (Bagelby) and Minor Illusion (Twyl).

The Mayor’s secretary walked in to try and get him to sign some paperwork, saw three Twillhoppers, and immediately left again.

They have already figured out half of my plot twist god damnit.

Asahi used a magical acorn to call Ena to join them at the Mayor’s house, but Ena misunderstood the context, thought Asahi was in danger, and broke in through a window instead of using the front door.

This window happened to lead into the bedroom of the Mayor’s son, who freaked out upon finding a strange horned woman in his room.

Asahi ran upstairs when the screaming started, and both she and Ena had to be escorted back downstairs by two very underpaid guards.

At the same time, Thiori found the attached hallway and came over from the museum, and casually asked what he’d missed.

Lex filled him in, startling everyone else, who hadn’t noticed her coming in behind the secretary earlier.

We left off there with the party together at the Mayor’s house, with Lex still to tell everyone about meeting Whitescale 2.0 on the Bell Tower roof.

[castle-dominion]

c4x7 cops & robbers

castle: bored af Tho I like how he's with his mom at the bank not for co-signing or anything but just for... moral support?

MR: Richard, I’m a business woman now. I do not want your money, I do not want your signature, thank you very much. It’s the principle. Dp: No, Ms. Rogers, it’s the interest. RC: And I’ve just lost mine. Excuse me.

I'm watching this after covid, it didn't seem out of the ordinary At All to see ppl with masks. RC, seeing sussy stuff: Hm. I think this bank is about to be robbed. *robbery starts* RC: It’s not my imagination. It’s definitely not my imagination. I love how he Just Happens to be on the phone with the cops when this is going down lol. She's able to just call it over to her homicide team

Ok so I know This Guy & he just nods at castle's shh motion. Makes sense For Now. Castle should really put the phone in his bra or smth so he can have it still recording w/o needing to have it up to his ear obviously. If it was in his bra (which he totally has) he could still describe the scene (which is smart of him) Manager just has it on his neck? Make that four. "You a cop? (to Castle) You called a cop?" "No. I-- We were already on the line when you guys came in."

British sounding accent huh Love the different doctor names. My first thought was healthcare was so bad in the usa that they needed to rob a bank. How did he open the door I thought he locked it? He DID lock it the thing is right there! I guess it has some wiggle room. You know, come to think of it, those doors look lik ethey are made of glass. Strong structured & thick, but still. A heavy object a couple times... Love a good hostage situation. We've all seen Die Hard we know how this goes.

Man's right. You're homicide he's robbery. He's also very calm & direct. Not impolite but firm & short. (tho "missed your cue" was rude) Where's demming tho?

What if I raise my hand to ask a question? lmao acab tho I don't trust anything here

Ryan looks very s2 like. Blue shirt, tie, brown normal jacket. Espt looks bisexual with his layers. Nice to have contacts in emergency service units Bro I think the robbery people have this handled.

She's a woman she doesn't need to have a bedroom voice the robber is just like horny & straight or smth I don't think that keeping him calm is hard bc he seems like a pro. TJ: Yeah, I don't like that other guy. KB: Yeah, me neither. peterson: ?? Trapper John! Bro it's M*A*S*H! You should come down & watch this episode with us! He IS a pro Oh no now cap peterson thinks that he is beckett's boyf.

Wow what a jerk. Blaming someone for the bank getting robbed. Or well, for getting the cops here too soon. If the cops didn't get here maybe they would have left with the money & let the hostages go. Except the bank ppl said the silent alarms went so ok. Oh no don't tell me we're going to deliver a baby I like how she says they should let the pregnant lady go but the way she says it implies she's ok with being held hostage.

RC: Don’t worry mother. I saw this work on Die Hard. RC: Uh, Mr. Howser-- Excuse me, Doctor Howser. Why not just give them a cup behind a desk?

RC: So, why Doogie Howser? I mean there's so many cool TV doctors you could pick.

Was espt in ESU before homicide? What IS his exp?

omg he likes her <3 lmao the banker & actress hitting it off I wanted to check out the food at my new work before I start working there & ofc I ended up using the washroom & there was some sort of old b/w sensual film playing in the stall. it is not his box: how did he get the key? woah castle remembers which wall & row & column it was in?? & Dp knows the number??? Martha-?

Three hours sounds... reasonable...

it's me! I know morse code! ... -.. is what I saw but they kept cutting away. I also don't know numbers only letters. Numbers are easy I just don't know them. how DO you know it's him? It could be another smart civilian!

Martha actress moments Why is That Guy telling castle this? He was "in the washroom" during castle's secret message sal martino? idk I'll continue with That Guy (unless I quote). "you have no idea" WOW THIS EPISODE IS GOOD I don't make promises

Rick did too well, SM was supposed to freak out bc of the c-4 but rick calmed him down which was NOT the plan.

Wasn't gideon fields? Sus. KR: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You can't go in there, we don't have a warrant and we don't have probable cause. JE: Bro, Castle's life depends on this. KR: ... Did you just hear that? I think I just heard someone yell out, "Help, police!" JE: (in a voice) "Help, police!" There it is again. Ah yes, dead bodies. Grody. & perfect for the homicide detectives.

I couldn't tell if she was dead for a week or she was just old... but then again the smell of decomp

JE: I don't get it. This is a little, old, retired librarian. What could possibly be in her safe deposit box that would be worth doing all this? KR: Nazi gold, cold fusion, map to Atlantis. JE: Hey, Castle Jr., could you maybe start thinking like a cop, please? (Castle HAS mentioned nazi gold) KR standing with That Booty: I am!?? JE: Are you? KR: It had to have been something huge that was worth killing her over, right? Hey, Super Cop, check it out.

Hug alexis, becks, she needs it, you might too. But hey, rick made kate promise to take care of alexis! & esposito promised to get rid of his porn collection!

Rick just do the flashing bracelet thing again. Idk numbers but (-.-.) ..-. --- ..- .-. is easy enough What is HER accent? cushions is a good idea <3 GOSH WHAT aT Least put him sideways so he doesn't choke!

told Whom to stay with her? Y'all never leave me a voicemail, please text.

it's legit not enough time bestie Send in esposito he looks like a buff firefighter paramedic

Trapper would know her voice. Bad idea. Love the double talking obv not a paramedic since she didn't know she could put the gurney closer to the ground & then raise it up once the fellow is on there UM SIGN LANGUAGE MUCH? Castle could have totally slipped it into sal's shirt

Martha should totally have just kicked everyone's ass & the hostages could have gotten themselves out on the fury of a mother There is a second T in twenTy kate That chuckle was very nathan fillion bc that's where the money is lmao Castle why are you revealing your hand? Just like tf2 for real just like rvb for real Castle has escaped duck tape before. Zip ties are easy to get out of

RC: Mother, I find I'm no longer satisfied with the customer service at this establishment. I think we should take our business elsewhere. Me: Is that code? RC: no just trying to be funny ig

Ron Brandt. Good thing I didn't switch names Were those guys wearing black before? & now they are covered in dust? or were they always wearing that greyish colour?

PUT AWAY THE GUN BEFORE YOU UNTIE THEM BESTIE mr: *shaking her hands with a grin*

They would NOT have messed up Captain Peterson probably is surprised with how good castle is, he's like "wow this guy really does know his stuff" Whose body parts?

Oh no are castle's banker & mother going to sleep together?

I like how beckett has a touchphone & ryan has a flip or smth

See? Castle wasn't supposed to calm him down Holy crap bad bruising I sometimes hate being a christian (what with being who I am) but right now I love it.

That Guy: Honey, I'm home. what a line Girl u should have kicked his balls while he was outside the door TG: Oh, no. Hon, you bumped your head. Ha what a typical abuser line. Disgusting.

*kept the cop's face in shadow*

JE: Come on, let's go pick them up. KR: Ithaca??? Why is espt just going on this huge road trip with ryan? RC: Even as a hostage, I help you solve murders. Beckett, I think…I think you have the perfect partner.

Poor alexis. Poor Ash. Long distance sucks.

In my binge watch I should have counted these. 8th time becks saved castle, castle has saved her 9.

The vodun episode with the purses & champagne, I remember that. The nikki heat murders were not a save, she lived you just gave her your coat RC: Won't be forgetting that anytime soon.

[stitchspell]

Temptation in a Kilt CH 1

by Victoria Roberts

fun little find at a local bookstore, they sell a lot of these old romance novels they pick up at estate sales. Every now and again I drop in to pick up a cheesy romance book and my partner and I read through them chapter by chapter until we both get lost in an ADHD activity frensy, but the books help keep us on a task.

hard to read aloud if you can't do a good scottish accent, which I cannae, but my partner puts on a fantastic show for me.

So far we've got a traditional 'met at royal banquet' kind of setting. We've got our MC, Cieran (I looked up how this could be pronounced and there were like 3 different ways and we settled on KEER-IN bc it seemed like the one we would mess up the least), oldest of three sons who inherited his father's estate, etc, etc, general male lead stuff, haven't seen too much of his personality yet but he seems to be the stereotypical 'my brothers are idiots and I'm very serious' guy. Our female lead, Rosalia, is honestly the star of the show, we've got our typical 'parents are broke and trying to marry me off to a gross dude for m o n e y' thing going on. I was kind of guessing the way the story was going to go when we were introduced to her via her mom screaming at her in the banquet hall about how she was 21 now, nO oNe WiLl MaRrY yOu kind of scene, you know. The male and female lead lock eyes and gush about it endlessly (they haven't spoken at all in the first chapter'. Rosalia's mother, unnamed so far I think (she may have been named but her character is basically 'bitchy mom' so I kept reffering to her as that), finds said 'gross dude' she's supposed to marry who basically offers an open marriage after she bears him an heir, basic plot kind of stuff for these books. The world is really small up to this point? Like, my partner and I kept kind of flip-flopping between 'yeah, this is about right for these kinds of books' and 'okay this is a little different' kind of stuff. Maybe my scope on this kind of literature is still small. Work in progress i'll probably return to later. Anyway, Rosalia and Cieran part ways at the banquet, again they haven't spoke at all, and Rosalia returns home to discuss her future being married to aforementioned 'gross dude' with his gross dude plans and sexual propositions. They give us a sweet older cook who's kind of a grandma to her and a stable boy who sees her (platonically) as like a sibling/friend as a relief from her otherwise shitty life with her mean ass mom and complacent dad (dad's still a dick in my option for sitting by while the mom does all of the forced marriage arranging/ beatings), we see a little bit of her life there and kind of see a peak of her personality, which is a little one dimensional so far but to be fair we're only in first chapter, BUT THEN

we get like a 'mulan' moment???? She cuts off all her hair and runs away in the night with one of her family's horses???? I know it's a little cliché but I didn't expect it with the way the chapter was going, honestly. She takes off towards Northern Scotland where she has a grandmother she's never met (her mom was an englishwoman and didn't want to associate w/ any of dad's family, but she's gotten letters/ gifts from her grandmother), the last scene in the chapter is her passing out on her horse but like, I read a tiny bit into the second chapter and she was FOUND by Cieran's party on their way back to his estate (obv she's still in disguise) So that's my poor, uncultured review of Temptation in a Kilt Chapter 1 (and kind of a tiny bit of 2.)